#my thedas academia

[wardenassan]

I restarted my save this morning because I wasn't really clicking with Veil Jumper (with this Rook anyway) but I've barely had a chance to play since!!!! I got through an annoying work meeting and I was gonna get to play all afternoon and then there was another work emergency!!!!!! I just wanna play!!!!!!!!!

[nadas-dirthalen]

Dragon Age: the Veilguard Was Packed with Lore — But Many of Us Overlooked It

— PART ONE — [ 2 ]

Welcome back, friends and travellers. If you've been here a while, you'll know that I wrote 30,000 words of predictions in the week and a half before DA:tV released. But here's the most surprising thing—I was right, for the most part.

I spent my first Veilguard playthrough grinning (and then sobbing) at all the lore reveals. And here's the thing: I think most of us missed a lot of them, including even me.

So let's begin with...

Titans: Dark and Light, Compassion and Rage, the Eternal Hymn and its Endless Listeners (1/2)

This is your warning: This post will contain spoilers for the entirety of Dragon Age: the Veilguard, and all Dragon Age content made before Veilguard.

Alright, pals. If you've been here a while, you know how this goes. I always start by listing what we're going to cover, like anyone who's never fully recovered from academia.

Today's Discussion:

What Veilguard (Re)Taught Us about the Titans

The Titans the first Shapers of the known world.

The Titans are beings of the Abyss.

The Titans are sleeping, dormant—but alive.

Dwarves are the Titans' children, created to tend them.

The Evanuris mined the Titans' bodies to create people.

The Titans—the Earth—fought back.

What Veilguard (Re)Taught Us about the Titans

The best thing about Dragon Age, as someone who loves the series to death, is that its worldbuilding is consistent, but also bears the unique quality that we, as players, are not aware of it all. Our protagonists in each game don't know everything; the people they learn from also don't know everything. We learn what we can through codices that are all biased and need an extra layer of decoding. This is a feature, not a bug.

It also means that we did not know how to understand the Titans before. Even my 30,000 words of theorycrafting, especially my piece all about the Titans, had elements of speculation. I had to check that speculation against other sources like the Chant of Light, which is a source that we REALLY did not know how to decode when it was revealed piece by piece in DAO, DA2, World of Thedas, and Inquisition.

Here, I'm going to break it all down, piece by piece.

The Titans were the first Shapers of the (known) world.

It is said in the Descent DLC that Titans are enormous beings whose singing shapes the world. Their existence predates much of Thedas, if not all of it. The Titans are called the first Shapers for this reason, and in Veilguard it is restated several times over that they did, indeed, shape the world—for instance, by Cole in Inquisition.

"Their ancient shapers were mountains drawn of all their wills, walking their memories into valleys of the world." —Cole dialogue.

Inquisition told us so much more about the Titans than just that, though. The Titans have a realm all their own, a counterpart to the Fade, mentioned over and again in the Chant of Light and referenced as a quest name in Inquisition.

Here lies the abyss: the well of all souls.

The Titans are beings of the Abyss.

Now, it's important that I mention right here that the Chant of Light has existed long before Inquisition. In fact, its tale is what opens DA:O as the game begins. Recently Eurogamer stated that BioWare has had a massive lore document for the 20+ years of its existence, and I believe that there is no truer example of this than in the Chant of Light itself.

The Abyss, for a long time, was a mystery to us. Inquisition cleared it up a lot—not only with its game content, but with World of Thedas' publication shortly thereafter.

Not only is the Abyss referred to in many elven codices, but we go there. The key locations of the Descent DLC—the Forgotten Caverns, Bastion of the Pure, and the Wellspring—are in a region called the Uncharted Abyss.

Now, with Harding, we go deeper into the Deep Roads than the average dweller. The same is true in that instance: venture down far enough, and we reach a Titan's heart.

We find a Titan's heart there. But the Titan does not wake—none have before DA:tV, and even then, they have not fully woken. Because, for as long as we have known...

The Titans are sleeping, dormant—but alive.

"It's singing. A they that's an it that's asleep, but still making music." — Cole dialogue.

There is so much Cole dialogue in Inquisition that speaks on the sleeping Titans, on their old songs that once sang the same, on how they will never wake up, that it would be folly to try and post every codex here. Suffice it to say: Cole knows of the Titans, knows of their songs, and knows they are asleep. He is one of the pathways to our knowledge of the Titans in Inquisition, and his words are peppered throughout the game.

The Chant of Light also makes reference to a mountainous Maker, who oft speaks about a forgotten mountain. When Andraste meets the Maker "in darkness unbroken," specifically, these words are used:

The Maker Appears to Andraste (7) Eyes sorrow-blinded, in darkness unbroken There 'pon the mountain, a voice answered my call. "Heart that is broken, beats still unceasing, An ocean of sorrow does nobody drown. — Andraste 1:7

Heart that is broken, beats still unceasing — a being who has been broken, but whose heart still beats. We can hear that, in the Descent DLC.

Veilguard confirms that both sources are true through Harding, her personal quest, and the codices for the Dwarven people.

Records that exist outside of Orzammar mention "great sleeping Titans" and "the First Ancestors." — Codex Entry: Harding's Notes: Orzammar and Titans

Harding's experiences in Veilguard, in this way, serve to prove Cole right. That is a deliberate narrative choice: BioWare's way of saying, Yes, this is true. Yes, you should take Cole's take on Titans as correct.

We also know, from Cole, that this state of being is permanent. Not only are the Titans asleep, but they don't know how to wake.

Songs screaming far away. It wants to wake up but can't remember how. No one should be here. — Cole dialogue.

This becomes crucial information in Veilguard, and central to the main plot. It serves as the backdrop for what actually matters most to the characters living in Thedas right now, which is...

Dwarves are the Titans' children, created to tend them.

By now, a lot of people have seen this reveal in the art book: the dwarves were created to tend to their Titan hosts/makers. But we knew this before—we just didn't know it in context, and therefore we did not believe it to be objectively true of Thedas.

In truth, we've known about the elves and the dwarves' origin since the Chant of Light came out in full with World of Thedas volume 2.

At last did the Maker From the living world Make men. Immutable, as the substance of the earth, With souls made of dream and idea, hope and fear, Endless possibilities. — Threnodies 5:5

I talk about it in more depth in my Chant of Light dissection, but what this verse says in context is that the dwarves (the Maker's second children) are beings crafted by the maker: bodies made of lyrium, souls made of the same "dream and idea, hope and fear" as the original spirits.

This concept has already been massively hinted toward with both Valta (who has become The Oracle in DA:tV) and Dagna, who both connect to isatunoll during Descent and Inquisition's base game, respectively.

We've known about the Evanuris' horrible crimes since before Inquisition, as well, for the same reason and from the same verses in the Chant of Light.

Until, at last, some of the firstborn said: "Our Father has abandoned us for these lesser things. We have power over heaven. Let us rule over earth as well And become greater gods than our Father." (8) The demons appeared to the children of earth in dreams And named themselves gods, demanding fealty. — Threnodies 5

With the context given to us by Trespasser and Veilguard, we know without a doubt that the Evanuris are those "jealous spirits" that comprise the Maker's first children.

And just like the Chant describes, they sought to conquer the earth: the realm of the Titans.

The Evanuris mined the Titans' bodies to create people.

Trespasser taught us so much of what we needed to know about the Evanuris' and Titans' conflicts. Its codices in the Deep Roads outline how it was Mythal, specifically, creating some of the first elves in the coffins found in that zone. The Temple of Solasan features coffins of the exact same kind.

Ir sa tel'nal Mythal las ma theneras Ir san'a emma Him solas evanuris Da'durgen'lin Banal malas elgara Bellanaris, bellanaris. — Codex: Torn Notebook in the Deep Roads, Section 3

My (updated) translation: Isatunoll Mythal gives you dreams Lyrium within Becomes Solas evanuris Little stone boy You give nothing to the Titan (anymore) Forever, forever.

Trespasser reveals that Mythal mined the bodies of slain titans and rendered their demesne unto the People: she conquered Titans and used their bodies for her own ends. The hints about these actions, however, are not exclusive to Trespasser, nor to Solasan. These seeds were planted all the way back at the Temple of Mythal.

Elgar'nan, Wrath and Thunder, Give us glory. Give us victory, over the Earth that shakes our cities. Strike the usurpers with your lightning. Burn the ground under your gaze. Bring Winged Death against those who throw down our work. Elgar'nan, help us tame the land.

This codex to Elgar'nan makes reference to Elgar'nan giving victory over the Earth (capital-E, the Titans). Trespasser would follow this up with much context—that it was Mythal who was first known to have slain Titans, "rendering their demesne unto the People."

I theorized that Mythal's mining of Titans for lyrium to make elvhen bodies was what angered the Titans, based on codices in Trespasser and the Temple of Solasan. (I go into much more depth there!) Veilguard confirms this theory in Solas' Memory #4: A Memory of Manifestation.

Solas: I have the Fade. Besides, this talk of taking on a solid form. When you took the glowing stone to build your body, did the earth not shake? Mythal: The lyrium gives us the strength we had when we were of the Fade. We are the best of physical and spirit.

Mythal's crime was what took the war with the Titans in a new, darker direction. It was what would set off the chain of events that would change the very nature of the world—and it was foreshadowed, back in Inquisition, by Cole.

The Titans—the Earth—fought back.

"They made bodies from the earth, and the earth was afraid. It fought back, but they made it forget." — Cole dialogue.

In this post, I theorized that it was Solas' creation itself that caused the first Titan to "go red." That is to say, to change its nature and fight back. I used codices from Trespasser and Solasan to get there, as well as one paragraph from World of Thedas and this codex on Fen'Harel that describe the Forgotten Ones as "beings of terror, malice, spite, and pestilence."

Thinking about those words, and specifically terror, I read the codex in the secret Deep Roads room in Trespasser with fresh perspective.

For a moment, the scent of blood fills the air, and there is a vivid image of green vines growing and enveloping a sphere of fire. The vision grows dark. An aeon seems to pass. Then the runes crackle, as if filled with an angry energy. A new vision appears: elves collapsing caverns, sealing the Deep Roads with stone and magic. Terror, heart-pounding, ice-cold, as the last of the spells is cast.

Terror. The first of the turned Titans. The fire/plant/ice imagery also caught my eye, and when I went back to Solasan to check, there were many hints that this was, indeed, where Terror came into being. (For more, go look at the most recently linked post in this section!)

Huge implications for Solas aside, what this codex taught me is that Titans' natures could change. This was confirmed in Veilguard many times over, yes—but my point here is that Inquisition taught this to me, just a few days before I gained the context of Veilguard. This was never a retcon! However, this lore plays exactly to BioWare's rules: we did not have the full context, and so almost no one read that Deep Roads codex as it was meant to be interpreted—including me, the first few times I read it!

It was only when I'd seen the achievement icons before Veilguard's release that it all clicked for me. All of the lore of Inquisition and everything before it made sense. That was never a bug, never a retcon, but a genius twist on BioWare's behalf: one that almost no one guessed at for an entire decade.

One that changes everything.

Titans, we know for certain now, behave as spirits. Obscure hints in World of Thedas, Inquisition, and the previous games have been confirmed in Veilguard. This new understanding changes not just the Titans, not just the dwarves, but reframes everything we know about the entire history of Thedas and how its magic system works.

______

Thank you for reading! It means a lot when people engage with these. And don't worry: I'm not nearly through with them. It's taken me a while to compile everything, but with more of Veilguard added to the wiki every day, it's a lot easier to compile things for these posts!

(Immense thanks to the wiki staff, of course. <3)

Up Next: Titans and Spirits are far more similar than we think, and it means everything.

[thedinanshiral]

Time is an illusion

After trying to calculate an estimate for Emmrich's age, i thought "hey, why not calculate what Dragon Age year would be my birth year?" and next thing i knew i was falling down a black hole.

Unfortunately i don't have the exact source as this was said earily on during the glorious week of reveals and news and we were all so very excited i forgot to take notes then but i remember it was first said the time skip to The Veilguard was of 9 years since Trespasser. Then it was said to be 10 years since Trespasser. And yesterday someone asked Weekes on his socials and he replied he thought they'd said the year was 9:52 but we'll have to wait until someone releases an "official answer".

Well, here is my non-official answer: the year is Harvestmere 9:53 Dragon. But most of the game should occur during 9:54. How did i reach that conclusion? A mix of in-game and IRL time estimates.

First a disclaimer: I believe Dragon Age: The Veilguard will be released in November 2024. I only have my gut feeling and DAI's 10th anniversary, and DAO's 15th anniversary to go by to claim that; this whole thing hangs on a November release.

Ok so I went back to my first point of reference which is The Flame Eternal short story from 2021 which states said story happened "thirty years ago" in 9:22 Dragon. This sets the present of Thedas at that time as 9:52 Dragon.

In Inquisition if you ally with mages, during In Hushed Whispers when asking what year is it in that demon infested future the Inquisitor is told it's "Harvestmere 9:42" and Dorian comments you've missed a whole year. This would mean Inquisition -the game- starts in Harvestmere 9:41 Dragon. Let's say the events of the game take a whole year so it ends in 9:42 Dragon. Then Trespasser makes a jump two years ahead of that, to 9:44 Dragon. This is the year we should center these calculations on. Everything up to that point, DAO, DA2, and even DAI occur asynchronously, meaning they don't happen at the same time we're playing them. That's how a 10 year difference between the Fifth Blight in DAO and Inquisition only took 5 years of ours, and how in the span of a few months of ours 2 whole years passed between DAI the Exalted Council in Trespasser. While we as players experience these events in our present time, they do not correspond to our present time, this is specially clear in DA2 when not even the events of the game happen in the present of Thedas as it's Varric telling Cassandra the story of Hawke. The game begins already letting us know this already happened, more or less as Varric narrates it.

But why should the calendar of a fictional fantasy game match with ours? Well it shouldn't necessarily, but they've set the game roughly 10 years after the previous one, and 10 years have passed IRL as well, and thats enough for me. The short story saying 9:22 was thirty years ago published in late 2021 also matches this. So after establishing that our present and Thedas' seems to be marching at the same rate now, sort of, i took a look at their calendar. Without going into much detail they have 12 months as well and the calendar in use originated in the early Tevinter Imperium, so the months have an original Tevene name used for official records and academia, and a common name used by the people; i'll be using the latter. DAI begins in Harvestmere 9:41, Harvestmere is the 10th month of the thedosian calendar but just because our times kinda match now that doesn't mean Harvestmere is equivalent to our October. It seems it's equivalent to November. The following month, Firstfall, is when thedosians celebrate Satinalia, which obviously sounds awfully much like Saturnalia, a roman festivity that took place during December. Tevinter Empirium is based on Rome, so i think taking this into consideration is enough to say Firstfall is equivalent to December but since we're here the other detail that adds to this is Harvestmere seems to be November also because DAI begins in Harvestmere, and it was released in November 2014.

Following this train of thought i looked at Trespasser's release date, September 2015. If Firstfall is our December, that'd make our September their Matrinalis, so we could estimate then that the Exalted Council takes place around Matrinalis 9:44 Dragon. The All Soul's day is celebrated at the beginning of Matrinalis, so the lack of mention of it during the Exalted Council tells me the day had already passed.

But 10 years after Trespasser IRL would be September 2025, so how do i make it make sense?

If September 2015 coincides with Matrinalis 9:44 Dragon, then September 2025 would do so with Matrinalis 9:54 Dragon, there's a 10 month difference between Sept. '25 and Nov.'24, so that'd make Nov'24 match with Harvestmere 9:53, merely 2 months away from 9:54 Dragon. Nobody's saying the time skip is exactly 10 years down to a precise date so i think just the year being 9:54 should suffice.

This little difference made me look back at the trailers and realize hey, that's not where the game begins, right? Can't be. What do you mean we immediatelt get hired by Varric and go after Solas at Level 1??? Where's the tutorials??? Is Rook always Tevinter or that's just in the case of choosing Shadow Dragons as a faction? What if Rook's faction is the Mourn Watch, what's a Watcher of Nevarra doing in a Minrathous bar fighting Venatori? What's a Veil Jumper from Arlathan Forest doing in a Minrathous bar fighting Venatori? What's a Grey Warden doing in a Minrathous bar fighting Venatori?? Who says "yeah sure let's go" when a couple of dwarves approach them at a Minrathous bar after fighting Venatori like "hey we gotta stop an elven god from taking down the Veil and destroying the world, wanna come?"?????? The cinematic trailer was just that, ilustrative, but the gameplay trailer was more intentional in everything it showed, and what it didn't show at all. We are introduced to a Rook who happens to be of the Shadow Dragons so them being in Minrathous needs no explanation, and they start at lv.1 and immediately thrown into combat with nothing resembling a tutorial ( except for some commentary edited in to present different aspects of the new system, as it's a gameplay reveal trailer).

So my guess is, yeah the game starts in Harvestmere 9:53 Dragon, and in the two months left until 9:54 Dragon maybe we're shown Rook at their home, or where their faction is, maybe establishing some relationships within said faction ( friends, family, rivals, etc) and thats' when we get a quick tutorial and some context because remember, technically one doesn't need play the previous games first to play The Veilguard. New players must have some introduction to the world of Thedas, what's what, who's who, where's where and what's at stake. So i think the two months difference is when all that -plus a trip to Minrathous if they're not already there- can be crammed into so the action truly starts in 9:54, more or less 10 years after the events of Trespasser.

Not saying i'm correct in my estimations here, and as i mentioned at the beginning all this hangs on a November release, and the time skip being of more o less 10 years. If in the end any of that turns out to be different everything i presented in this post falls like a house of cards. But hey, it was fun putting it up.

If you've read this far, thank you and congratulations, you're a very patient person.

[deedala]

🌿w e e k l y 🍄 t a g 🕯️ w e d n e s d a y🌙

thanks @darlingian for writing this week!! and thanks for tagging me @creepkinginc @energievie @metalheadmickey 💖💖💖

which character from any media would you like to have as a father?: oh hey yeah i am going to have to also say Bob Belcher. He is dad goals.

if money, laws, time, and effort were no object, what animal would you want to have?: im sorry i have a whole entire me and 2 kids to take care of i dont want anything else lmao

what is your Chinese takeout order?: veggie fried rice and veggie egg rolls!

what's your favourite emoji?: omg i dunno uhmmmm 💖 is probably up there!!

would you rather have a library, greenhouse, or home theater in your house?: okay i am a legendary plant killer but i would LOVE to be able to just hang in a greenhouse. thats my vibe. i just cannot be responsible for those plants ok

what childhood tv show do you think of the most fondly?: david the gnome!

what was your tumblr like when you first joined?: for a really long time my tumblr was just my silly little artworks, from like 2011 to late 2014. in 2015 it became more of my dragon age artwork and fandom blog. and then a few years ago i just started reblogging whatever the fuck i wanted. and well now its a whole mess huh. my beloved trash pile.

what clothing style do you love but don't feel compelled to replicate yourself?: cottage core and dark academia

if you were plopped into a fictional world, which one would you know the layout of the best?: Thedas hoo boy

what is your favourite piece of art?: hmmm birth of venus by william-adolphe bouguereau

do you have a water bottle? what does it look like?: aluminum cup with a straw style, its blue and green and has a leaves design on it

what fanfic trope is a quiet fave? uuhhh...i dont know if i have a quiet fav?

do you carry a daily bag? what does it look like? what's the weirdest thing in it?: lately its been an addidas black drawstring bag. i just dug through it and found absolutely nothing un-normal haha?? i guess the most uncommon thing in there might be the epi-pens??

If you had to ship Mickey with another Gallagher, who would it be?: what kind of choice is this?? im going to go ahead and be a cheater and say i BFF ship mickey with debbie

what is a fanfic trope you didn't expect to like and then very much did?: ack...again i dunno?? i just like all the basic things and i dont know enough about the other stuff? maybe i need to try more things that i think sound unfun lol

Do you think s11 Mickey can still carry s11 Ian?: lmao hes so inexplicably swole, yes absolutely

who got custody of the killing bat when they sold the house?: i want debbie to have that, she deserves it.

Okay here's some nuggets who i think might want to play!! @michellemisfit @too-schoolforcool @mickeysgaymom @heymrspatel @gallawitchxx @gardenerian @callivich @juliakayyy @mmmichyyy @jrooc @sam-loves-seb @crossmydna @suzy-queued @tanktopgallavich @lingy910y @transmickey @rereadanon @palepinkgoat @sickness-health-all-that-shit @suchagallabitch @thepupperino @sleepyfacetoughguy @tsuga-of-mars and also you person not tagged you can lie and say i tagged you as always i will corroborate~

[breninarthur]

WIP Title Ask Game

Thanks for the tag @theluckywizard! I swear I cut this down 😅

Rules: reveal the titles of the documents in your WIP folder and tag as many people as there are documents. Let others ask questions about the ones that interest them and post snippets or explain the contents as you see fit!  

Dragon Age

- when darkness comes - Kallian's longfic! Eventual Alistairmance. Currently working on the Korcari Wilds chapter, and the Joining too.

- Knight My Heart - Urban Fantasy Actor AU

- Stories of Thedas: Tabris Tales - Drabbles following various Tabris ancestors

- Dots and Blanks - the next entry in my Nobody Dies* AU

- The Romantic Misadventures of One Maz Hawke

- A WIP for a friend that's taken an embarrassingly long time

- Codex: Kallian Tabris - Kallian as a companion faux wiki page

- Elf Names of Thedas - a list of Elvhen names created using canon words

- Thedas Astrology

My Hero Academia

- All I Want - cringe is dead but is it tho

- best worst coffee in japan - KRBK

- Untitled Christmas KRBK fic

Avatar

- Unnamed ATLA Book 4 fic

- Unnamed Pro-Bending fic - post-Korra, all OCs

Supernatural

- The Reunion - An ancient Destiel fic but it's still in my mind

Original Work (All Working/Redacted Titles)

- Shadows WIP - my main focus, a Celtic fantasy

- Superhero WIP

- To Hell With It - a sort of theological paranormal

- Grief WIP - a play about someone who dies and their sibling and partner who pick up the pieces

Tagging: @ziskandra @bog-mummies @kurgy @rosella-writes @doomhippy83 @cleverblackcat @dreadfutures @liza011 @wildbasil @popcornjoejoe and anyone else who wants to! Please do tag me if you do it ❤

[mirrordaltokki]

Writer's Game

Writer's Game: First Sentences

Rules: post the first sentence of your last ten fics. If you haven't written ten fics, share as many first-sentences as you have.

Tagged by @theepicreboot

I don't have many people, but I'll tag the ones I do that haven't done this! Tagging @hawksongwrites, @dragons-bones, @punchelf, @wickedwildsurge, @gunbun, and anyone who stumbles upon this in the wild.

From top to bottom of my posting order on AO3, the last 10 fics I've got. Behold the sheer diversity of what comes out of my noggin. My it's a lot of isekai. Please mind the tags, as they may not be for everybody and I am very much a DD:DNE writer.

La Lapine et le Dragon - FFXIV. Rated E, WoL/Estinien. An AU erotic retelling of Beaumont's La Belle et la Bête with inspiration from the Epic of Gilgamesh. Featuring a Nidhogg-possessed Estinien as the Beast and the Warrior of Light as Belle. Multi-chapter, WiP.

The Dragonsong War began by man’s greed and ended by man’s ultimate sacrifice.

2. everything he can lay his hands on - FFXIV. Rated E, Erenville/Estinien. The saga of an irritated gleaner who just wants to go home and have a cup of coffee and the brat of a dragoon who decided ‘yes, this one seems good’ and just keeps on testing his limits. One shot, complete.

To be a gleaner was to be perpetually tired.

3. on a grave of yellow flowers - S and D Tier. Rated E, S Tier/D Tier, by nature of the fandom can be read entirely fandom blind. AU Hanahaki wherein D Tier has Hanahaki Disease because of S Tier. One shot, complete.

The masses dubbed him Nyarlathotep, the Crawling Chaos, God of a Thousand Forms, Stalker Among the Stars, the super villain that made other super villains look like jokes, mass murderer, a blight upon humanity.

4. let me treasure you - FFXIV. Rated E, Estinien/Tataru. One shot, complete.

He doesn’t understand how they can’t see it.

5. PF [Duty Completion] That One Meme - FFXIV. Rated M, eventual G'raha Tia/OC or Thancred/OC. The bulk of my life, the isekai fic featuring one FF14 player stuck in the body of her WoL, doing the most to try to change what she thinks are the bad parts of the plot and save the day. Results may vary. Multi-chapter, WiP.

“Left, left, go left motherfucker,” she hissed, knees crossed on her chair as her fingers all but flew across the keyboard, one hand still on her mouse to click and scroll as necessary.

6. Made of Star Stuff - League of Legends. Rated E, Viego/Reader Insert. Featuring a defined reader character who dies and is stuck with her soul in a pond made of stars and souls. Multi-chapter, complete.

It's cold.

7. Grading and You - My Hero Academia/Boku no Hero Academia. Rated T, Reader Insert & Toshinori Yagi/All Might. Gift fic. One shot, complete.

You're pretty sure this isn't how your day was supposed to go.

8. Oops, Wrong Genre - League of Legends. Rated E, Sett/Reader Insert. Genre-savvy modern-day woman isekai'd into Runeterra, thinks she's got it but hasn't got a clue. Accidentally a fight club membership. Multi-chapter, complete.

This is, irrefutably, a spectacularly awful dream ripped straight out of an anime.

9. The Paperwork Has Paperwork - My Hero Academia/Boku no Hero Academia. Rated T, Aizawa/OC. Featuring a police secretary who is underpaid and overworked, hates the hero population for giving her more work, and idolizes Eraserhead as the pinnacle of heroic perfection for his swift and perfect paperwork skills. Doesn't hurt that it turns out he's attractive in person. Multi-chapter, WiP.

Heroes, as a whole, were the most irresponsible wastes of oxygen to walk the face of the planet.

10. I Want To Be Your Canary - Dragon Age: Inquisition. Rated E, eventual Cullen/OC. Modern Character in Thedas, where the main protagonist is a mage stuck in her own botched spellwork and turned into a bird-woman because of it. Multi-chapter, eternal hiatus.

They say that being a hero in your own story meant being the villain in someone else’s.

[ao3feed-izuku-midoriya]

My Dragon Academia

My Dragon Academia by PureLaith

In the wake of the Fifth Blight, the Gray Wardens must rise once again to battle the hordes of Darkspawn, when they all fall, it's up to the last remaining 2 and their 19 other allies to prevent The Blight from exterminating all of Thedas.

Words: 1750, Chapters: 1/1, Language: English

Fandoms: Dragon Age (Video Games), Dragon Age: Origins, 僕のヒーローアカデミア | Boku no Hero Academia | My Hero Academia

Rating: Mature

Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings

Characters: Midoriya Izuku, Aizawa Shouta | Eraserhead, Midoriya Hisashi, Midoriya Inko, Dabi | Todoroki Touya, Akaguro Chizome | Stain, Asui Tsuyu, But she's a, Mabari (Dragon Age), Shimura Nana

Read Here: https://archiveofourown.org/works/44345290

[evillesbianvillainarchive]

Its super late but today me and cole added Hawks and Natsuo to the MTA au so

Natsuo was born in the magi tower but since he wasn’t a mage nor he had any special ability that could interess Endeavor and his goals and also he had no intentions om becoming a templar, he was cast out of the Tower when he was a young teen (around 13 years old). He lived mostly on the streets and at some point found himself in trouble. He was saved by the Grey Wardens and joined them, leaving Ferelden till the blight started and he finally managed to be together with his family again.

Hawks is Chasind and was kidnapped by the Templars when he was rather young - like around 8 years olds - and forced into the Circle. He already got some sort of affinity with animals by that time tho and spent the rest of his time in the Circle either trying to escape - succeeding twice but being brought back because he didnt destroy his phylactery - or using his abilities to learn how to change form into a hawk. By the time he mastered his shapeshifter abilities he already became quite the nemesi of Endeavor, being one of the few mages who dared to stand up to him and that even managed to ridicule him. They were thinking of making him tranquil when Hawks finally managed destroy his phylactery - controlling a templar through blood magic - and escaped in his hawk form. Endeavor chased him but couldn’t find him for months so he lied, saying he found him and killed him to keep his honor in the Chantry.

Hawks went back to the Kolcari Wilds and it was there that he met a little orphan Tokoyami, took him with him and taught him everything he knew about magic and shapeshifting.

Also Hawks and Natsuo are together, continuing the memorable tradition of Enji’s kin to just fucking become apostates and/or falling in love with apostates.

[doctormage]

like fucking clockwork now that I have consistent work my brain is just firing off dragon age bullshit at all times. I had the urge to draw for the first time in weeks yesterday. I am in hell

[baejax-the-great]

The first thing Lara did when she decided to leave Val Royeaux was turn off her phone. Actually, the first thing she did was gingerly set down the book she had been reading on the little table next to her armchair. Then she turned off her phone, scooped her things into her duffel, and took one long look at Solas sleeping in their bed.

Never was she more thankful that he was a deep sleeper. Or less thankful. No, definitely more thankful.

Yeah.

It was the middle of the night, but she didn’t sleep much on the train. Sleeping would not solve her problems, and she had more problems than she cared to think about. Leaving felt good. Leaving felt right. As she watched the sun rise over rural Orlais, she was certain it had been the correct decision.

[literary-lion]

Outrageous Things I've Done for the Love of Books | Top Ten Tuesday

Outrageous Things I’ve Done for the Love of Books | Top Ten Tuesday

The topic this week is Outrageous Things I’ve Done for the Love of Books!

This is a weird topic because I’ve never really done anything that out there. Instead, this will just be ten books that I got in ways that were unusual for me! None of them are crazy, and that’s alright. I do love books but I like to display that love in quiet hoarding and reading, nothing dramatic. Although I’m excited…

[echoequinox]

rules: answer 30 questions and tag 20 blogs you wish to know better (i’m not gonna do that lmao). tagged by @hardisonparker​

name/nickname: echo! no nicknames, thank god

gender: woman comma trans question mark

star sign: i was born under the sign of the shadow on the first of sun’s height (or cancer, for the boring astrology)

height: 5′ 10″ (blech, tall girl squad)

time: 8:42am - only awake this early for a therapist who isn’t responding

birthday: july 1

favorite bands: at the moment uhhhh i dont... really listen to a lot of band bands. i’ll just say linkin park still

favorite solo artist: matt maeson and porter robinson for fuckin SURE

song stuck in my head: hero too from my hero academia by... chrissy costanza, i think?

last movie: i think my roommate made me watch To All the Boys I Loved Before: The Third One

last show: cw flash!! i’m really into it rn it’s fuckin great, cisco is a gem tbh

when did you create this blog: like..... 2013 i think, it was when i came out

what do I post: rarely anything, i dunno, clowns?

last thing googled: survey says.... elder scrolls star signs for the above joke JFDKSALC

do I get asks: no :) <3

why I chose my url: when i changed my name to echo i wanted to overhaul my brand so i moved from realityengineer/realityassassin to echoequinox. equinox doesn’t actually have any special meaning, it’s just another E word i liked, like echo

following: 286 but i really should go prune that and then follow new blogs with my more recent hyperfixations (like flash and my hero)

followers: i actually have like 400 followers but i keep forgetting followers on tumblr don’t mean shit like they do on twitter - zero fuckin engagement when it’s not people you know personally

average hours of sleep: anywhere from 6-14 hours a day, broken up every two hours by my insane sleep apnea that stops my breathing completely. i snore really bad lmfao 

lucky number: lucky? none. i like 7s though, like 7, 17, 27, etc. maybe it’s because they’re usually prime

instruments: so i played trombone in high school (ilu @exrayspex <3) but i dont play anything as of late. i really wanna get into music and make fun music in a daw like fruityloops, which i wholeheartedly believe to be an instrument

what am I wearing: this pink shirt that’s too small for me, like all my shirts. that’s it. the bare minimum of a therapy zoom call

dream job: either novelist or video game designer/writer. i really like writing. i wrote a really smutty monster fucker erotica that i’d love to publish but no one to read and edit it lmao whomp whomp (like it put it up on twitter and it didn’t even get any likes, it was rough)

dream trip: somewhere overseas. i really like italy and i’ve wanted to go to greece since i saw it in mamma mia lmfao 

last book I read: OOOOOH the new star wars novel from the high republic uhhh light of the jedi i think. “read” is a strong word - i finished about half of it and got distracted by everything else in my shitty life

favorite food: taco bell, PERIOD. more specifically like... the crunchwrap i guess - lots of meat and cheese, in a convenient to eat package (pro-tip: customize it in ANY way or you’ll get one of the ones sitting on the rack for like an hour). or the quesadilla but you literally have to get extra everything for it to be worth it, but the sauce is to die for. get the app, y’all, you can customize whatever you want super easy, pay for it there, and at the drive thru be like “i have a mobile order for echo” and that’s IT. minimal contact, it’s a godsend

nationality: white (american)

favorite song: uhhh? right now it’s either Hero Too from my hero or Get Your Wish by Porter Robinson 🥺 it feels so painfully trans (also whenever i see porter robinson i think of the “your brother is gnc af” “YOURE INSANE” post because got damn porter is gnc af lmfao)

top three fictional universes: i gueeess i gotta say....... tamriel (elder scrolls), thedas (dragon age), and the my hero universe? yeah that tracks

[ao3feed-tododeku]

Before the Dawn

Before the Dawn by Original CopyCat

Orlais, a nation known for extravagance and secrecy and ruled over for centuries by the renowned Todoroki family. In a nation where competition for influence and esteem between the Orlesian nobles is prime focus, any kind of scandal could be ones downfall. As they say the more influence you have, the higher the chance for demise. Even the ruling family isn't off the table in their cutthroat game. Thus setting a domino effect into place and bringing together an unlikely group of people just trying to survive everyday life in their home continent, Thedas. From a rogue trying to make a quick dime, to the biggest scandal surrounding the Todoroki family and everything in between. Join us as our unlikely heroes face danger, romance, and dragons.

//Loosely based off of Dragon Age. You do not need to know Dragon age to be able to understand it.//

Words: 2595, Chapters: 1/?, Language: English

Series: Part 2 of MonoMay

Fandoms: 僕のヒーローアカデミア | Boku no Hero Academia | My Hero Academia

Rating: Mature

Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence

Categories: F/F, Gen, M/M, Multi

Characters: Monoma Neito, Shinsou Hitoshi, Kendou Itsuka, Kodai Yui, Midoriya Izuku, Todoroki Shouto, Uraraka Ochako, Bakugou Katsuki, Kirishima Eijirou

Relationships: Monoma Neito/Shinsou Hitoshi, Kendou Itsuka/Kodai Yui, Midoriya Izuku/Todoroki Shouto, Bakugou Katsuki/Kirishima Eijirou

Additional Tags: Dragon Age AU, Canon-Typical Violence, Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Implied/Referenced Character Death, Alternate Universe - No Quirks, Emotional/Psychological Abuse, Abuse, taking the cast of bnha and throwing them into a dragon age universe, Templars, Mages, found/ forced family, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, MonoMay, Dragons, Elves

Read Here: http://archiveofourown.org/works/23984041

[orsino-the-enchanter]

Modern Thedas verse: Dark academia aesthetic for my thread with @shield-of-shame

[ao3feed-hitoshi-shinsou]

Before the Dawn

Before the Dawn by Original CopyCat

Orlais, a nation known for extravagance and secrecy and ruled over for centuries by the renowned Todoroki family. In a nation where competition for influence and esteem between the Orlesian nobles is prime focus, any kind of scandal could be ones downfall. As they say the more influence you have, the higher the chance for demise. Even the ruling family isn't off the table in their cutthroat game. Thus setting a domino effect into place and bringing together an unlikely group of people just trying to survive everyday life in their home continent, Thedas. From a rogue trying to make a quick dime, to the biggest scandal surrounding the Todoroki family and everything in between. Join us as our unlikely heroes face danger, romance, and dragons.

//Loosely based off of Dragon Age. You do not need to know Dragon age to be able to understand it.//

Words: 2595, Chapters: 1/?, Language: English

Series: Part 2 of MonoMay

Fandoms: 僕のヒーローアカデミア | Boku no Hero Academia | My Hero Academia

Rating: Mature

Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence

Categories: F/F, Gen, M/M, Multi

Characters: Monoma Neito, Shinsou Hitoshi, Kendou Itsuka, Kodai Yui, Midoriya Izuku, Todoroki Shouto, Uraraka Ochako, Bakugou Katsuki, Kirishima Eijirou

Relationships: Monoma Neito/Shinsou Hitoshi, Kendou Itsuka/Kodai Yui, Midoriya Izuku/Todoroki Shouto, Bakugou Katsuki/Kirishima Eijirou

Additional Tags: Dragon Age AU, Canon-Typical Violence, Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Implied/Referenced Character Death, Alternate Universe - No Quirks, Emotional/Psychological Abuse, Abuse, taking the cast of bnha and throwing them into a dragon age universe, Templars, Mages, found/ forced family, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, MonoMay, Dragons, Elves

Read Here: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23984041

[veridium]

happy pills

The storm is on the horizon for your favorite modern thedas college girls. It’s my honor to push my piece a step further on the board. This episode brought to you by Norah Jones’s “Happy Pills,” otherwise known as my favorite song to sing wine drunk in the shower! 

Enjoy some sad, tepid burn and friends knocking sense into each other! uwu!

start from the beginning // previous episode

--

6:50am, Friday morning:

--dude, send me your coffee order in ten minutes or perish.

Ellinor: surprise me

--you hate when I do that

Ellinor: you always say that! you know me

--ok fine, it’s my funeral after it’s yours. I’m at the studio. Hopefully you’ve snuck back through the window from your nocturnal love nesting.

Friday morning workout at the dance studio does not rival Josephine’s pep talk as far as therapeutic outlets go, but it’s a close placebo. She’s been going once a day at least since Wednesday evening, and switched to early mornings in order to evade any possible ‘run-in.’ Now she is an even more mean, lean, dancing machine than she usually is, dressed in her black leotard, tights, and running shorts. The last thing on her to-do list while in town is to stop into the coffee shop downtown to pick up coffee for her and Ellinor -- she called dibs on the honors, edging out Cullen for once that week.

She parks her car on the curb at 7:45am and tosses her hair up in a clip. Hopping out of her mini and over the crosswalk, she walks in with ease though the memories flood. Down the way she sees the table where her and Cassandra had their disaster coffee meet-up, and butterflies yet linger in her stomach as she waits in line to place her order.

Just as it’s her turn, people come down the shop stairs from the second-floor lounge area. A set of flats with ballerina laces, the other calf-high, military style boots. The worst combination of people there could ever be. Cassandra, and the red-headed friend of Josephine’s. Lily? Leliana. Leliana.

What are they doing here? It’s the crack of fucking dawn!

They’re walking close, and it’s not due to the lack of space. Shoulder-to-shoulder, like...like how they used to. Olivia can’t bare to look at their faces and have it be made worse. She closes her eyes and turns away. Dread and its accompanying sensations flood her from nose to toe. She braces for a collision, a cringey ‘oh how do you know so-and-so?’ and sly grin for absolutely no reason. Cassandra’s awkward inability to hide her feelings of uncomfortable distaste.

But, across the floor, the secondary door entrance rings its bell, and she turns to see they are gone. Left without so much as a horrible side-eye. Well, fine, if that is how it is...

Is she that unrecognizable post-workout? God, she must be. She pulls out her phone and flips the selfie camera on. It isn’t the worst she’s ever looked -- sophomore year, second semester finals definitely takes the cake in that category. But she does look...human. Mortal. Normal, sans emo pride flag hoisted in her wake.

Her gawking is interrupted by a text from Ellinor:

Ellinor: Hey, still bringing my coffee? I have some things to do and class later…

--Yeah, I’m ordering now. Be at the dorm in 15.

Oh, so she is alive. Funny. She pays for her to-go order, a white non-fat mocha and an Oregon chai. She’s expanding Ellinor’s palate, slowly but surely, starting with the chai family. Today is a risky day to try, though -- Ellinor has been a happy nervous mess, and last night’s antics have them both on edge: another instance where she’d said she would come home in a few hours, tops, only to stay over until morning. Something’s got to give.

Heading to her car, she makes a couple more texts, but to Theia instead:

--dude, hey, do you know Leliana?

She’s buckled up by the time Theia responds. The early mechanic bird always gets first dibs at tinkering with the shop stuff, as she would say.

Theia: Leliana? Who fucking doesn’t.

--That makes me feel better. She queer?

Theia: Yeah, she’s one of us. Cool once she likes you. I swear she ran a government background check on me when I started hanging out with Josie.

--well, great, she’s hanging out with...she who shall not be named

Theia: Well, hope she says goodbye, because I’m still killing her lol

--Ha, very funny. I gotta drive, I’ll text you later. See you this weekend at the gala?

Theia: Yep!

Well, shit. What’s there to like about the situation besides their choice in shoes? Nothing. But she’s got a coffee order to deliver to her best friend, and that takes precedent. She puts the car into gear and takes off.

Once on campus she marches straight up to their rooms, where Ellinor is waiting with a boot tapping the ground and phone in both her hands.

“There you are! Fuck,” Ellinor sighs, rubbing one of her eyes. “Tell me it’s at least a double-shot.”

“Triple,” Olivia grins, handing it to her. They both sip, and Ellinor makes a face.

“Is this a boujee chai? You got me a boujee chai again.”

“I got you a nice chai. You’re welcome, Olivia, for being my coffee fairy…”

Ellinor pinches the bridge of her nose, like a reset button, and refocuses on her phone screen. Is she still grumpy from Olivia’s read last night? Maybe, it was a bit...brutal. That’s what happens when you catch her trying to sleep, noise machine on ocean sounds and late night oreos digesting.

“Thank you,” Ellinor finally spits out, pulling her headphones from her denim jacket pocket. “I’m sorry, I’m just...worried.”

“Why? What’s up? Fuck, my class starts soon, let me throw some clothes on and get my bag.”

A black spaghetti strap, black jeans, and a grey long cardigan will have to do. She runs some product through her wet hair and ties it back up, and out in no more than 3 minutes. They get down the stairs and onto the sidewalk. Private enough for multitasking gossip and academia.

“So, what’s with the stick up your ass?” Olivia asks, slipping her aviators on.

“Nothing.”

“Bullshit.”

“Not even!”

“You got ten minutes before the door closes and you gotta find another plucky blonde to be your confessor, dude. Speak now or forever hold your peace!”

“Urgh!” Ellinor chokes back an erroneous groan, pressing her to-go cup to her lips. “I need to be beamed up, Scotty. This is getting too much.”

“Too much? Dude, what?”

Ellinor takes another long chug, and their walking gets faster. Oh no, she’s not getting out of this one.

“His sister is arriving today.”

“I thought you were excited to meet her.”

“I am! It’s just...It’s…” they round a corner, a back path to the area of campus where their buildings are located. “You know in movies and shit when people get introduced to other people and the mutual friend goes “ah, shit, this is...my...friend,” like all awkward? I realized this morning that he’s gonna have to do that.”

Olivia sighs, adjusting the position of her bag shoulder strap and hooking her thumb onto it. “And you want to be introduced as an important person.”

“Yes! I--NO!”

“Aha!” Olivia finger guns. Caught red-handed...or...hearted...whatever it is.

“That is not what I am having an issue with! Look, you were right, okay. I don’t want it to be this way. I need to nix it.”

Olivia dragged her shoe heel to a halt, eyes round and mouth agape. “The fuck?! Ellinor, how am I to blame for this?”

“Your text! You...with the thing...and the ‘is this what I want’ shit!”

“Ugh! Ellinor, Jesus Christ!” she grabbed her by the wrist and pulled her off to the side. They had entered a little park-like area, with a couple trees and a cheap looking sitting bench. Guiding -- no, yanking -- Ellinor to it, she slung her onto her ass and set down her coffee.

“Alright, Ellinor, gloves coming off.”

“What?”

“Gloves, off,” Olivia rolls her shoulders. She’s still feeling bouncy and strong from workout. “You keep saying the opposite of what you feel and it shows. You obviously like him, and he obviously likes you. Why are you acting like being an adult only means saying no? The fuck?” Olivia throws her arms up.

“I’m not! I’m just being practical! I don’t even know if would want to be anything else. He seems perfectly fine as it is!”

“Who said to be friends, Ellinor? Who? I’ll give you three guesses, the first two don’t count!”

The world seemed to stop turning. Olivia stood there, hunched forward in her shoulders, looking like she was lobbying on a Congressional floor that water was a basic human right. That same ardor, all for her best friend botching her love life. But Ellinor was squirming for all the wrong reasons. She was doing exactly what she did when things got too good: finding a reason to call it good, while they were ahead.

Ellinor bunches her knees together and sits back, pouting.

“I said it,” she mumbles.

“I’m sorry, I didn’t quite hear. Who?” Olivia holds a hand to the rim of her ear.

Ellinor purses her lips and looks off to the side, evading her eye. “I did…” another low tone.

“Uh, come again?”

“I did! Dammit!” she kicks the floor and folds her arms. “Shit, fuck, dammit…”

“BINGO! Ya’ll we got a winner!” The salt in her tone’s getting excessive, even for her own internal standards. Which, clearly, are immense. Deflating her tirade and taking a breath, Olivia puts her hands to her hips. Shifting from antagonist asshole friend to helpful soccer coach mom.

“Babe,” Olivia gives in, “maybe it’s time you listen to the Disney song and say you like him, and you know what you want from him.”

“Do I?” Ellinor asks as Olivia sits down next to her, thigh-against-thigh. She lays her head on Olivia’s shoulder. “I’m so confused I can barely think straight.”

“Hey, that’s less of a problem then you think.”

“Oh. Ha-ha, nice gay joke, funky little bisexual.”

Olivia giggles, and wraps her arm around hers. “Hey, it worked. And now, we’re gonna be late for class.”

“I know.”

They both sigh, and accept the inevitable. Each of them has their reasons. Ellinor probably doesn’t want to see Cullen and have all her existential agony to show off. Olivia just...wants to stop caring. The week has gone on logistically without a hitch, and her workaholic personality has ensured everything but her love and social life has gone smooth. Everything is on fire, but it’s fine. It’s so fine.

“Well, games are fun, right? We’ll have fun.”

Olivia stills, her cheeks flushing. It suddenly gets a whole lot hotter. “Uh, hey, about that…”

Ellinor twitches and sits up, looking at her with a pointed face of ‘oh god, please don’t.’ “Olivia…”

She cringes and bunches her shoulders. “I just don’t think it’s a good idea.”

“You said yesterday it’d be fine! That you were all good under the hood!”

She glares, but with a laugh in the back of her throat. “I didn’t say ‘all good under the hood.’ I have never said that in my damn life.”

“You! But you said! Ugh, unbelievable!” Ellinor let her hands fall up, then down onto her jeans, making a slapping down. “What’s going on? Did you talk to Cass?”

Cass. She calls her Cass all the time. It’s nice, but it’s not her. Cullen calls her Cass, too. They all call her Cass. Why not her? Why does she have to be extra and say ‘Cassandra’ all the damn time? For fuck’s sake.

“No, I haven’t. It’s still radio silence, but…” she teeters on whether or not to explain, but she figures it’s written all over her face anyways. Ellinor’s look of skeptical frustration says as much. “I saw her this morning.”

She pauses. Anticlimactic, so it seems. “You...saw her? Is that...a big deal?”

“No, it’s…” she rubs her hand against her scalp of tied-back hair. “It’s not that, really. It’s...how I saw her.”

Ellinor looks as if she’s about to hear a testimony of assisted homicide, as she turns to face her, criss-crossing her legs and picking her coffee up. “What is that supposed to mean?”

“You know that girl I told you about, the one Josie introduced me too?”

“Yeah, the creepy redhead. What about her...oh, oh no. Liv…” she scowls in sympathy, “they weren’t…”

Liv smiles with sadness and looks off to the grass in front of them. “They were at the coffee shop. What was supposed to be our coffee shop. At 7:45 in the morning, no less. You know what that means.”

“...morning after hookup coffee…” Ellinor whines a bit in secondhand misery. “Fuck. It can’t be.”

“I mean, I was wrong. I must be,” Olivia shrugs. “Or she’s having very fond friendships.” Very, very fond. 7:45 in the morning, dressed with makeup on and school bags packed fond. No one’s that fond without something that perked them up the morning before. Unless you were Ellinor Trevelyan and hated admitting feelings.

“The worst part,” she chuckles again, “the worst fucking part! Is that Leliana said she heard about me. My dumbass was like ‘oh, cool, Josie mentioned me,’ but no! It was! Her! That...that!” she stops before she gets carried away, gritting her teeth as she puts her coffee to her chin. “They must laugh about me. Goodness, why would she make a move on Cassandra, she’s clearly not interested and spoken for! Secret...CIA lesbians…”

Ellinor rolls her lips, choking on her laugh she so desperately wants to let out. They refrain from eye contact in order to save face.

“You might be jumping to conclusions, maybe? They could be friends. Josie and her seemed tight, and you don’t know if this Leliana person is even--”

“I texted Theia after I saw them. She’s ‘one of us.’ And pretty, and sophisticated, and...has leadership roles. I look like a chipmunk and Marilyn Manson had a love child on a good day.”

Ellinor gasped, and slapped her in the thigh. “Olivia Berenice, shut up! What the hell! Whatever this woman has going for her, you’re hot, okay? Hot, and brilliant, and cultured!”

“I’m a chipmunk!”

Ellinor roars and starts tickling her in the side, but she only groans and squirms like a gangling preteen without proper cognitive awareness. But, laughter does take hold, and she even snorts.

“Fine, fine! I’m not a chipmunk!” she wiggles, “I just! I’m mad. I’m mad that I’m mad. I shouldn’t be jealous of something that wasn’t mine to begin with. But here I am, sulking and pouting, going ‘but that’s MY spare bike helmet she’s probably wearing, riding on the back of her motorcycle.’ I want to bury myself alive. This shit blows.” She sips more of her mocha, but the sweetness is no longer satisfying. The taste of resentment and unresolved bisexuality overtakes the white chocolate.

“It...it does blow,” Ellinor admits, leaning forward with her elbows on her knees. “Damn.”

“So, forgive me, but I don’t think me showing up tonight will be good. Or necessary. I’m just gonna be that awkward friend that Cullen wants to be nice to but also respect his roommate’s choices. And from what I gather of Leliana, she’ll probably just go Avril Lavigne and kick me into the mini-golf lagoon.”

That evokes a laugh, but a sorry one. Pity. Ellinor downs the rest of her chai and slides her feet over the edge of the bench, boots barely touching down on the dirt. “That means I’ll be on my own with Rosalie, probably. Fuck.”

“Hey, that’s not a bad thing. You’re cute, and funny. From what I’ve heard of her, she’ll probably look at you like the sun shines out your ass. A grunge babe, out in the world and getting educated. Yeah…” she teases, a crooked and charming smile.

Ellinor groans. “I’m a mess, is what I am. She’ll see me twenty yards out and go ‘shit, what’s that hot mess express doing out here in public?’ and Cullen will go, ‘hey, that’s my friend! My friendly friend, who I only have friendship for. The friendliest friend to ever...friend…” she gets sadder the more she talks, as does her posture. It’s disheartening to see her spin and spin and spin, rather than just cut herself a break.

“Ell, you gotta put yourself outta your misery,” Olivia concludes, pulling her phone out. “And I don’t mean by taking a break.”

“There’s no way to know if I’ll be more miserable for indulging myself, though. I’ll just jump out into the water and fall flat on my face.”

“Or, he could catch you, like he’s been trying and offering to this whole damn time.”

“That’s not true!”

“Ughhh, Ellinooorr,” Olivia falls forward into her lap, her head hung low. “Christ alive.”

“It’s not! He doesn’t look a touch uncomfortable with being friends.”

“Yeah, because so far friends has gotten him a spooning-mate for what, three nights?”

“Two!”

“Two! My God, forget about it, nevermind!”

They roll their eyes at the same time but for contrasting reasons. Olivia, fed up a bit by the circular direction of the conversation, would rather go to class and risk being locked out for her delinquency. “Come on, to class, binch.”

Ellinor lays her head back but pushes herself up, dragging her feet but carrying on. When they’re back on the sidewalk, fresh air in their lungs, things feel a bit less useless.

“But that also means he’s probably sick of me making demands,” Ellinor speaks again after about a minute of walking. “If I try to reset the boundaries, he’ll probably think I’m too bossy or something.”

“The man likes to be bossed,” Olivia says rather mercilessly, “I’ve never seen a guy with a more apparent invisible “peg me” sign on his forehead.”

“Olivia!!”

“What?!” she shrugs, “there’s a nobility in getting pegged.”

“Yeah? And what would you be, if Cassandra was involved?” a sharp, cutting response. Maybe Olivia hit a nerve too far.

She sighs. “The best peggers know when it’s their turn to get pegged,” she answered, “I do not possess such talents. The force is not with me.”

They come to the short concrete walkway to Olivia’s building and stop. People walk past, closer so that they have to be more secretive with their highly classified discussion.

“The force could be in you, maybe,” she giggles crassly, “uh, I mean, pour one out for your pegging skills,” side-stepping towards the path where she must walk alone. “You sure you don’t wanna go, dude? It’ll be a crowd, and you can spend all your time with Rosalie if you want to. I might need the help if she turns out hating my guts.”

Olivia slides her hands into her jean pockets and looks around. No one familiar, no one worth her attentions. Good.

“I’m sorry, Ellinor. I’m recovering, and I’m a hell of a lot better than I was last weekend, but...I don’t think I can see her. See them...at least, not like that.” The sight of Cassandra playing soccer was still sacred to her. The first real sight she ever got of her in action, and the epicenter of happier times with Ellinor on the grass sipping drinks and fantasizing about their love stories.

“Okay. Text me, alright? If you change your mind I can just swing around and come get you.”

“No worries. I’m probably gonna drive home tonight, actually. I got my dress for the gala, I just need to go spend time with Mother dearest.”

“Ugh, really?”

“Yeah. I know,” she huffs, looking up at the third floor windows where her lecture is being held without her. “Time to wake up and get on with life. You, at least, are still holding out.”

“Psh! No,” Ellinor make a ‘yikes face.’ “I’m on thin ice right next to you.”

Olivia stares at her, a brow raised. “Ellinor.”

“...what?”

She shakes her head, and turns her shoulders towards the doors that await her. “I’ll put it this way: I walked out on my person after demanding space once, and she came back around. I did it again, and I lost everything good about it in fear of facing the ‘maybe’ bad stuff. Don’t be me, checking messages that are a week old, hoping that I somehow missed one. Don’t get your heart smashed into the sidewalk when you see him out with someone else because you didn’t know what you may have had. Please.”

It pains her to say it out loud, but it’s true. The week was a yellow-brick road of life lessons learned all-too-late. If she could go back, she’s unsure of what she’d do. Maybe not kiss her, maybe still try but then ask what was wrong. Talk to her. Listen. God, listen better. But it’s too late -- or, it’s too close to being too late, and she can’t keep doing this to herself.

Ellinor frowns, as if she is about to tear up. Olivia grins and pats her on the shoulder. “Hey, go to class, kid.”

“Okay. Text me, please? Let me know when you’re on the road and when you’re home.”

“I will. Love you, bestie.”

“You too, bestie.”

And with that, they part ways, Olivia retreating into her sacred building, called Tifton Hall by everyone else. The stairs sound better than an elevator, and when she gets to the third floor, she sees that class was let out early. Great, so it was no use showing up. She climbs back to the second floor where the faculty offices are along with the TA office desk and inboxes. If she can get nothing else out of being there, she can check for any last minute notes. She’s been a horrible TA -- it’s been over a week since she checked it.

Nothing’s there, though, with the exception of a red post-it. Some Professor’s shorthanded nonsense, probably. Ripping it from the box and sticking it on her finger, though, the truth is revealed:

“Stopped by to drop off things for a Professor. Hope you’re having a good day. -C”

Her throat nearly closes, or so it feels. It must have been old. She looks on the back, and true to Cassandra’s erudite character, it’s dated. The day before last Friday. The day they hadn’t seen each other, or text, really. Turns out her distance wasn’t so far.

She looks down either end of the hallway -- no one’s there to make fun of her for what she is about to do. She pulls out her favorite notebook and presses it to the inside cover. The last thing she’ll ever have, for when she starts to forget it was ever real.

God, Ellinor, don’t fuck up like I have.

Time to put headphones in and marathon King Princess, St. Vincent, and Halsey, her sapphic patroness Saints, until she feels too heartless to care. A playlist on her Spotify made by Sera for her last fallout with a girl, titled “Girl Troubles, Dedicated to Baby Liv.”