#my rook is not a patient woman when she’s drunk alright

[rookanisstuff]

“I wanna take you in the kitchen. Lift up your wedding dress someone was probably murdered in.”

[ellanainthetardis]

Hey after yesterday's prompt, I wonder if you would consider writing something where Finnick sees Effie in her underwear and how the situation would be totally different. Haymitch's reaction probably as well. :D

Here you go! Some steamy crack to start the week! [x]

Aphrodisiacs

Haymitch watched the boy movehis rook with a quiet sigh of despair. He had been trying to teach Finnick howto be a decent chess-player for two solid years now but the kid wasn’t anatural at it. Four’s victor wasn’t as hopeless at the game as his escort wasbut it was a close thing.

“Not good?” Finnick winced.

“Think it through.” Haymitchrebuked, making a grab for his glass only to realize it was empty. He hauledhimself off the couch and made his way to the liquor cart in the corner of thepenthouse’s living-room, sparing a quick glance for the city lights spillingfrom the bay window. Even in the middle of the night, the Capitol’s sky waspolluted by neon beams and flashing lights. “You’ve got to anticipate youropponent’s next move, boy.”

He poured himself some whiskey,not offering the eighteen year-old kid a refill because he didn’t really fancygetting scolded by Mags in the morning.

“I’m trying.” Finnick grumbled,taking his rook back to its original place to study the chessboard.

Haymitch rubbed his face andglanced at the clock, not surprised to find it was well past one in themorning. On the muted TV, the live feed of the arena was still going strong. Caesar’sface was in the bottom left corner as he commented the action, tangible proofin Haymitch’s opinion that they expected the Sixty-ninth Hunger Games to get avictor tonight. Caesar only appeared at night if the Gamemakers were suresomething interesting would happen. Two and Three still had all their tributesand the Career pack was currently hunting the boy from Six. Once they wouldhave taken him down, Haymitch figured it would be a second bloodbath, the kindof finale the Capitol loved.

The elevator chimed not longafter he had taken back his seat and Finnick had finally decided to move hisknight instead. Bold move. Stupid but bold. The trap was obvious and clumsy toHaymitch’s eyes but the fact that the kid was trying to set traps at all wasalready improvement.

“Haymitch?” Effie’s shrill voicecalled from the hallway, loud enough to wake the dead.

He rolled his eyes. What if hehad been asleep? Would she just have come storming in like a banshee and wokenhim up? Who was he kidding? Of course,she would have.

“Still kicking!” he shouted backbecause she had been reluctant to leave him to his own devices as if he were a child who needed a babysitter and nota grown man. “And what do you know! The Center’s still standing!”

He didn’t get an answer to thatvery clever retort. Finnick was watching him with a small grin, his green eyessparkling in amusement even as he tossed a few glances over his shoulder,waiting for Twelve’s escort to appear. She never did so Haymitch figured shehad gone to bed.

A whole night of partying withher silly friends for whoever’s birthday… She was probably exhausted.

He snorted.

Finnick lifted his eyebrows in asilent question that he waved away. With Effie Trinket, some things were betterleft unexplained.

They didn’t talk much during thenext minutes, Haymitch patiently lured Finnick in the web he had startedweaving since his very first move while avoiding his trap, making the boy sighin irritation. He was about to call checkmate when he heard the clicking ofheels in the corridor…

“Oh, Haymitch…” Effie sing-sang. “I have a surprise for you…”

He knew that tone and he guessed something terrible was about tohappen seconds before she appeared on the living-room’s threshold in all theglory of a pink and black corset bodice complete with ribbon suspenders,stockings and ridiculously high heels.

Finnick gaped.  And stared.

Haymitch bolted out of thearmchair and to her before he could think it through, confused by her own lackof reaction. She was just standing there, staring back, not making any move tocover herself or retreat to the safety of the corridor…

Now, let’s be honest, that wasthe kind of surprises he would have lovedif he had been alone.

The way the kid’s gaze wasroaming on her though? He didn’t love that so much. And he loved it even lessknowing Finnick had had a crush on her forever and that he would probably havevery wet dream that night.

“You mind?” he spat at the boy,trying to shield her with his body, shoving her back toward the corridor.

She was still strangely unresponsiveand it wasn’t until he took a good look at her that he realized why.

She was torched.

She reeked of tequila, her eyeswere glassy and she wasn’t so steady on her legs. She grabbed his arms with ahurt look on her face.

“Don’t you like my surprise?”she whined, her lips wobbling.

That was a drunk Effie for you.She went from complete happiness to total despair in the remarkable space oftwo seconds.

“You get that Finnick’s here,yeah?” he growled. “You remember I told you we were gonna play chess tonight?You need glasses or what?”

She blinked and peered over hisshoulder. “Oh… Yes, he is. How rude of me. Hello, Finnick, dear!”

Finnick was still speechless andcould only wave at her.

Haymitch spared him a glare.“You’re gonna pick that jaw off the floor any time soon, boy?”

Four’s victor blinked, clearedhis throat and finally realized whyhe shouldn’t be staring. The kid flushed bright red and looked around until hiseyes fell on the jacket Haymitch had discarded earlier. He grabbed it andcrossed the distance to hand it to Twelve’s victor. “Here.”

Haymitch snatched it from hishand and wrapped it around Effie’s body but it didn’t do much to hide… Well…Everything was pretty much on display. He supposed it was a small mercy she waswearing lingerie at all, she could have come barging in naked.

“You should pay attention tome.” Effie pouted, tossing her arms around his neck. “I want you to payattention to me.”

“Oh, I’m paying attention.” hescoffed. “Everyone’s paying attention.”

“Is Finnick leaving soon?” shepurred, nuzzling his check before playfully biting down on his earlobe. “I wantyou to play with me now. Not chessthough. Chess is boring. I want fun. I want…”

“Yeah.” he cut her off beforeshe could say something they would never be able to take back. He wasn’t surehow he was going to keep hearty denials that he wasn’t sleeping with her after that. The tips of his ears were red –and so was the back of his neck, he was pretty sure.

Finnick was equally crimson.“I’m going to go now.”

“She’s drunk.” he tried toargue. “She doesn’t know what she’s doing.”

“Sure.” the boy grinned but itturned to a small wince when Effie tangled a hand in Haymitch’s hair andforced  his head to the side to lick hisneck all the way up.

Haymitch almost choked because…“How many fucking bottles did youdrink?”

“A lot.” she hummed. “And there were those cocktails too… They aresupposed to get you… In the mood. Idrank a lot of those.”

“No kidding.” he deadpanned.

“Alright, I’m off.” Finnickinsisted, jamming the elevator button with his finger. He actually looked a bitspooked now, like he didn’t trust Effie not to have his way with Haymitch withhim standing right there and Haymitch wasn’t sure he was wrong to worry.

He waited until the boy was goneto push her away from him. She whined and immediately tried to sneak closeragain.

“Those cocktails… What the fuck are they?” he frowned.

“Aphrodisiacs.” she hummed. “Ididn’t really want them but Dawn kept buying them for me and it would have beenrude not to drink them. I liked the tequila shots better.”

“Dawn.” he repeated. “Who’sDawn?”

“A girl I used to hook up with.”she dismissed, shrugging off his jacket. And fuck but that corset bodice thing looked good on her. Now that Finnick was gone and he was finally able toappreciate it… His pants suddenly felt tight. “I think she really wanted meto go home with her.” she continued, her fingers traveling down his chest andthen back up. When she started toying with the buttons of his shirt, he didn’tstop her. “I really wanted you to fuck me though.”

“She drugged you?” he growled – because woman or not, there would behell to pay about that.

She stopped unbuttoning hisshirt to look up at him with a confused look, clearly trying to understand thequestion. “Do not be preposterous.” She slurred that last word slowly anduncertainly. “It is just a cocktail. Perfectly harmless. The tequila is thereal devil.”

She managed to get his shirtopen with a content sigh and pushed it off his shoulders, apparently not caringit remained stuck around his arms since he was still holding her at a safedistance. Well, probably not that safe given that her nails were scratching hisnipple.

“Effie.” he grumbled, trying tohold her further away but she whined and bit down on her bottom lip in aridiculously endearing pout. “You get you just made a pass at me in front of Finnick, yeah? You just stood therehalf-naked in front of the boy and you didn’t even care. Don’t tell me you’re in your right mind.”

She blinked and blinked again,looking upset now. “It is not myfault.”

“Didn’t say it was…” he cuthimself off and shook his head. “Okay. Bed. You need to sleep this off.”

“Bed, yes.” she beamed, suddenly happy again.

He hated when she was wasted.It was much easier being the one completely drunk than being the one takingcare of them.

“Your bed.” he clarified.

“Of course.” she chuckled andthen wrinkled her nose. “Your room is a mess.”

“I’m not fucking you when you’re like this.” he insisted. He stoppedfighting to keep her at bay but just because it was easier to steer her in thedirection of her bedroom when she was snuggled close against him.

“But I thought you would likeit.” she complained, looking down at herself and running her hand on thefabric.

“Oh, I like it” he muttered.“Bet the boy liked it too. The little shitcouldn’t take his eyes off you.”

“Language.” She clucked hertongue but she did sound a little put out. She wrapped her arms around his neckagain, making it hard for him to maneuver. He grabbed her waist and she justhopped on like it was perfectly fine for her to lock her legs around his hipson a whim. Her giggles were loud in his ear. “See? I knew you wanted me.”

“When don’t I?” he snorted,hoping she wouldn’t remember any of this in the morning. Not that he would lether forget the main events though. He would take great delight in making fun ofher and embarrassing her.

He managed to get to her roomand tried to drop her on the bed but she refused to let go of him. She was likean octopus and the things her mouth was doing to his neck shouldn’t have beenallowed because it made it really hard to think.Fuck, but she had him throbbing forher and she hadn’t even properly touched him yet.

“What’s in those aphrodisiaccocktails?” he grumbled.

“Ginger and ale and a lightrecreational drug.” she hummed. “It is all quiteharmless. They are pink with golden specks. Very pretty.”  

“Can’t believe you would bestupid enough to drink that.” he snapped,sitting down on the bed because it was the only way he could think of gettingher off him. She didn’t move out of his lap though. She seemed content to rubherself on him. He clenched his jaw but let her because… Well, fuck, he didn’t have a good reason. He knewshe wasn’t really herself and it was wrong but she was begging him and it wasn’t like they were strangers who had neverslept together before. Besides, she looked like she was in heat and he kind ofhoped if she got it out of her system she would be… a little less high. “Fuck, Effie…”

He groaned and dropped hisforehead on her shoulder because the rhythm she had going… It was good. He was going to come in his pantslike a teenager but it was all so good.

It clearly wasn’t working outthat well for her though because she sneaked a hand between their bodies.

She was touching herself, itwasn’t taking advantage if she was the one doing it… He kept telling himselfthat, not sure it was right, not sure it was okay… He was pretty sure theywould have an explanation the next day anyway so…

“I did not want to sleep withDawn.” she insisted, a little short of breath. “I am strictly into penisesthose days. Yours to be specific.” She laughed. “Isn’t it funny? I am Haymitchoriented…”

“Shit.” he spat and he just… He gave up.  He flopped on his back and he watched herhump him and get herself closer and closer to the climax she wanted, onlybatting her hands away when she tried to open his pants. She came with a sharplittle cry and he knew, just at the sound, that it wasn’t a good orgasm but shedropped on his chest anyway and nestled there like a content cat, leaving himto close his eyes and clench his jaw because of the hard-on nothing wasstimulating anymore. It took a very longtime before his erection disappeared and it wasn’t helped in anyway by thewoman napping on his body.

He found himself petting thepink wig, fighting off sleep. He tried to move her at some point but shestarted grumbling and holding him tighter and he decided it was safer to haveher asleep on top of him rather than in that sort of mood again so he just… drifted off.

He woke up to pained groans anda series of muttered obscenities he wasn’t aware she knew. Her familiar weightwas still on top of him but they had shifted at some point and now most of herlower body was framed by his spread legs – not his most glorious position. Shehad been using his stomach as a pillow and she had her face pressed against thescar on his side – not in a let me wake youup with sex way either.

“What’s the matter, sweetheart?” he teased.“Nasty headache?”

She groaned again and tried tocurl up which ended up with her knees propped on his right one and her torsoweighting down on parts of him that liked her to be pressed upon them. She was a little heavy for such a delicate area though and he pulled herup higher. She immediately hid her face in the crook of his neck and it tookhim a second to realize her problem was the light spilling from the windowbecause nobody had bothered pulling the curtains closed.

“Haymitch, there is an elephantpounding on my head.” she whined. “Make it stop.”

“Sorry, no can’t do. That’s whathappens to naughty girls who take drugs.” he mocked, not bothering to hide hisirritation.

“What are you on about?” shemuttered and then she winced. “Oh, the aphrodisiacs… They are perfectly…” Andthen she stopped and lifted her head, squinting at him because of the sunlight.“Did I truly walk around wearing…”

“Yeah.” he confirmed.

“In front of Finnick?” she insisted, lookingpanicked.

“Oh, yeah.” he shrugged.  “Lickedmy neck too.”

She shut her eyes tight andpressed her face against his shoulder with a disgruntled noise. “I am never drinking again.” She peeked up athim briefly. “Did I come on you?”

“Yeah.” he said but he was a bithesitant, not sure if she was going to be angry about that or not. She hadn’texactly been in any state to consent to anything and he didn’t want to be that asshole.

“You didn’t…” She let her sentence trail off.

“No.” he winced.

“Oh.” she breathed out and thennuzzled his shoulder. “I owe you one then but later if it is alright with you. Right now I feel like dying.”

“You’re not mad, then?” heasked, knowing he should have quitted while he was ahead.

“Mad?” she repeated. “Why wouldI be mad? You took care of me. If either of us should be mad, it shouldprobably be you.”

“I’m mad.” he scowled. “I don’t like you taking drugs. The state youwere in… Anyone could have done anything to you and you’d have probably thanked them too.”

She pursed her lips. “I was not that far gone. Just… uninhibited. My uninhibited self verymuch wants you as it turns out. Poor Dawn was very disappointed.”

“I bet.” he scoffed, coiling ahand around her nape. “Finnickwasn’t, let me tell you.”

“Oh dear.” she groaned againsthis skin. Then she grew very still and she bolted out of the bed and into thebathroom. The door slammed shut mere seconds before he heard the unmistakablesounds of retching.

“Hope you learn your lesson!” hetaunted, comfortable in his hypocrisy. “It’s never fun the next morning!”