#my ps works again after 2 years!!

[jaemlonfz]

can you do something about svt members wearing suits and holding their baby in the carrier infront and going for some event and the reader thinking "is it too soon to be wanting baby #2" 🫢 thank you <333

ps: i took over a MONTH to write this and i still think its not that good, i did not review it and english isnt my first language so im sorry if theres grammar errors, i hope yall like it wc: 3,1 K tw: there's the explanation and then pure filth, overall its basically all sorts of positions, crempie, praise kink in most of them, lmk if i forgot something so i was doing everyone in suits and wanting baby #2 but I started to think it was a bit silly because they all looked the same, so I changed the story for most of them. anyways i hope you still liked it, i made it with a lot of love and i apologize for taking so long

Seungcheol

You and Scoups were a public couple, fans distrusted you for years, you were always openly saying how much you loved seventeen's songs and still always singing Seungcheol's excerpts, and he openly talking about the films you star in without the slightest shame. So when you guys finally came out as a couple, your fanbase wasn't shocked at all.

A few years later as a married couple, after a one-year hiatus, you were seen in public with scoups carrying two little girls, that's how they found out that you had become parents of twin girls.

Years later, now with your daughters a bit older, you were getting ready for an awards ceremony, your burgundy dress matching with scoups tie, your girls' dresses in light pink. You were looking for your earring in every corner of your room when you went down to the living room to ask if your husband was with him, but when you arrived in the living room you saw the most adorable scene ever, Seungcheol trying to fix one of the girls' hairstyle while the another was stuck to his back kissing his cheek.

You can tell you felt your stomach turn at the Scoups' serious look as he tried not to ruin his daughter's hair, while the other looked at her father as if he were the most precious thing in the world.

Scoups was such a wonderful, caring and kind father.

You guys hadn't really brought up the subject of having kids anymore considering all the work you'd put in with both of them at once, but now it's a topic you'll actually talk about after seeing your husband being an extraordinary father.

It was only when you arrived at the awards ceremony that you realized you only had one earring in your ear.

-

“How beautiful my dear wife, you already want to have another baby”

Seungcheol said pushing his length into you, as he wiped your tears and brushed the hair stuck to your forehead.

“Will you let me fill you up so you can get pregnant again? Do you want to have a big belly carrying my son again?

Jeonghan

You knew you wanted to have another child with Jeonghan as soon as you saw him carrying your newborn son in the hospital, but that's something that absolutely every mother feels so you honestly didn't pay much attention to the feeling. But now, on the exact same date, a year later, you felt the same thing but with an animalistic intensity.

It was your son's first birthday and you decided to have a party with just the child's grandparents. With a maximum of ten balloons scattered around the large room, the grandparents amused by the baby's toothless smile, you decided to grab a candle and a lighter so you could sing personalized congratulations.

returning to the room with a candle and the lighter in your hand it was completely involuntary to rub your legs with emotion after seeing Jeonghan with your son in his arms. They were both wearing matching clothes, they both had the same smile, the same eyes and the same nose, they were like clones. the baby's thin hair was the same tone as yours but he was still a miniature Jeonghan, and seeing him smile so sincerely with his son in his arms made your eyes water a little.

-

“Jeonghan I want another baby." You admitted once the baby was sleeping in the crib.

“Do you really want another child or do you just want me to fill you?” He said smiling, and after your response in the blink of an eye your situation was completely different.

Your back arched as your ass was in the air and you cried and screamed with your face in the pillow.

“You asked for it, now you handle it.” Jeonghan said kissing your back.

Joshua

Joshua has always been a very giving person, every sunday going to church to pray for the well-being of others, and at least once a month going to orphanages to care for sick or orphaned children. And it was on one of these trips to the orphanage that you met.

Now years later Joshua continues with the same cherished habit of providing for others, and that's how you discovered that necessarily marrying him and carrying his child in your womb

Joshua was in bed when they called from the orphanage saying that a new child had arrived, as always Joshua shouted from the bed and ran asking if you would go with him to meet the new family member, you obviously said yes, quickly getting ready with him.

When you arrived in place, you ran to the bathroom because you were holding on too tightly to make a good impression on the child. returning to the giant garden looking for an unknown face, who you thought was around 4 or 5 years old, you saw Joshua's back and his arms as if he was waiting for something. Joshua quickly noticed your presence and turned to see you.

The child was definitely no older than 6 months old, Joshua held her with so much care, looked at her with so much care and love that you felt your blood pressure dropping.

Joshua was born to be a father, and you were the only one who hadn't realized that yet.

-

Now you had your legs as close together as possible, squeezing yourself constantly trying to hold in the liquid that would give you a child without letting a drop leak out.

As soon as you got home you admitted your dirty thoughts towards Joshua, who quickly took off your clothes, turned you around and filled you up.

“If you really want my son, don’t let a drop leak.” Joshua said from the kitchen, making you a sandwich while you smiled with completely red cheeks.

Junhui

It was the first time you had been away from your son for more than 10 hours, and Junhui was a wreck. Both had already cried because you missed your baby while he slept peacefully next to you, and now the day of true farewell had arrived.

You were going to a wedding a few hours away, so in case it was to late on the way back, you had already booked a hotel room just in case.

At the moment you were adjusting your heels sitting on the bed, while you saw Hunhui on the baby monitor talking to the adorable baby. you managed to hear a few words like “i’m going to miss you.” or “don’t cry too much in your grandmother’s ear.” Junhui was already ready with his suit and you, now late, ran to your son’s room to say goodbye too. but when you arrived at the door, when you saw Junhui's look at the child, you didn't know how to describe whether your heart was tender or swollen.

As expected, it was very late when the wedding ended and you had to sleep at the hotel, you could feel Junhui awake and restless by the way he moved in bed, and it left you with a wonderfull idea.

-

“You're such a good father." You said, panting on top of Junhui, riding his dick. “So worried about your son." Now you lay down in the perfect position to whisper in his ear

“Let’s give him a brother so he won’t be so alone, let’s have another child to worry about." You said and I could feel your cock twitching inside your tight, damaged interior

Soonyoung

it was yours daughter's first halloween, and quite obviously, soonyoung dressed her up as a tiger.

Yall had absolutely no party to go to, and honestly you thought the idea of ​​going door to door with a baby in costume was a bit strange, so you only dressed up for some photos and to have a fun memory about your first halloween as a family.

Soonyoung obviously begs you for the whole family to be tigers, so while you were looking for a shirt of his with a tiger print or some other style of clothing, when you returned to the living room you saw the most heart-warming scene in the world.

Soonyoung was holding the small hands of the child, who was trying to stand, while they were both smiling widely, you couldn't help it and took a photo of the moment, certainly thinking about how beautiful it would look framed on the wall.

Now that your daughter was already asleep, you went to talk to soonyoung about the scene you saw and you were obviously teased about it.

“Since you liked me so much seeing our daughter, let’s have another one”

-

“Younggg…” You mumbled trying not to make noise so as not to wake the beloved child in the next room

“i also love seeing you with our baby, let’s do one more” He pushed his length into you, who groaned at the invasion without warning.

“Ohh… ​​please soon, let’s have another one”

Wonwoo

In fact, wonwoo took the initiative to have another child with you.

Wonwoo has a younger brother and he can definitely say that it is a wonderful thing to have someone to look after and be able to talk to, so after a year of your baby being born wonwoo called you to talk about it.

The conversation was absolutely very short, he simply admitted that he wanted another child and you opened the robe you were wearing and let it fall to the floor

-

“Such a willing mother.” He kissed your chin and quickly moved down to your neck. “Such a willing wife”

“How can you be so willing to make me happy." He smiled ramming his cock into you, who twitched beneath him

“Are you so wet just thinking about me bearing another child? Do you like to imagine me filling your brim?”

You managed to hear a chuckle from him as you hurriedly shook your head answering the question. “You will look so beautiful swollen with my son”

Jihoon

Honestly there wasn't a specific moment that you knew you wanted to have another child with Jihoon, because you always knew that once you saw this man as a father, you would never stop, but I really think the penny dropped when your son asked for a sister.

You were having a movie night when suddenly your three year old son asked for a little sister. your face automatically turned to Jihoon, who as already looking at you.

You talked to your son and said you were going to talk to his father about it, and when you saw your son's reaction, you swore to yourself that you would give this child a giant family to love

“You can rest assured that you’re going to have a little sister." You heard Jihoon whispering in your son’s ear while he was still looking at you

-

“Jihoon…” you whimpered underneath him, your legs spread, your arms up being held by your husband’s strong hand

“We have to fulfill our firstborn’s wish, and now is the perfect time”

Jihoon was referring to the weekend he was spending with his grandparents, you were definitely going to be pregnant by the end of this sunday.

dokyeom -

Today was your cousin's wedding and you were desperately late. putting on your heels as you jumped up to your one-year-old daughter who was in her crib still in her pajamas, after all you left her there to get ready first and dress her up later, but distracted by the happiness of putting on makeup for a big event again you completely lost track of what time .

Mentally cursing yourself for messing around so much while doing your makeup, you entered the room imagining the little girl with her hair all tangled up, a dirty diaper stinking of poop and her tantruming with hunger, but when you opened your eye, preparing for the worst you saw dokyeom a hand without a lap.

He was holding her in his arms, trying to keep her awake so she could rest later. Dokyeom was divine with those formal clothes and kinda wet hair, you were led to think about your husband making you feel good thinking about having another child

She was already dressed beautifully, her suitcase was already packed, her hair was in a beautiful hairstyle and with a beautiful bow that matched her dress. Dokyeom had done all of this knowing you would be late.

-

“do you want to see me be a father again? did you like me seeing our daughter today?” dokyeom said as he kissed your sweaty neck.

“are you going to let me fill you up again? will you let me breed you?" he laughed at your scrunched up face with no coherent thoughts in your brain.

Mingyu

That Mingyu is a famous model that everyone knows, and that you, his makeup artist, had great chemistry with him, everyone knows, that's how you met. Now married with two daughters, brands caught your opportunity to do a commercial featuring Mingyu as his girls' father, so you did him in makeup for the shoot.

It was a casual commercial, something like them at a picnic, an outdoor field. With a brush you touch up the makeup on Mingyu's tanned skin while others arranging the scene.

In the scenes, Mingyu had one on his shoulders and the other was running hand in hand with her father or with the two playing together while he smiled admiringly. Seeing this scene was something that super swelled your heart with love and warmed your insides with emotion at seeing your husband and daughters.

When you got home at the end of the day, you were both exhausted and fell into your crib like rocks.

-

“Mingyu, give me another child” He wasted no time in pushing you onto the bed and holding your legs in the air and starting to push his length into your wet core.

“You were certainly excited about me seeing it in the commercial today, right? Do you want to have another child after you saw me looking so hot taking care of the girls” He talked to you while your eyes rolled constantly.

“Don’t worry, I’ll make sure to only let you sleep tonight after you have an baby in your womb.”

Minghao

You and Minghao always had in mind that you wanted someone to love and call family, technical children would only come as a bonus if your partner also liked the idea of ​​procreating.

Minghao was a little piece of heaven, being everything good you could imagine, so when he thought about his thoughts about just wanting one person to call family without the obligatory need to involve a baby you were left in doubt.

Your first child was an accident and you discovered the pregnancy at 4 months, welcoming the pregnancy you saw the brightness in Minghao's eyes increasing even more, especially after your son was born.

Now, a few years later with an older child and already demonstrating some personality traits, you will see that any chance to bring lives with the same principles as Minghao you will definitely seize this opportunity.

So yes, practically you would get pregnant countless times if it meant several mini Minghao’s around the world.

“Let’s have another baby now Hao” You said as soon as Minghao sat on the bed getting ready to sleep, but now a night’s sleep is no longer guaranteed.

-

You were on your sides, lying on the bed, your pajamas were askew and your panties dragged to the side as Minghao pushed into you calmly.

“How beautiful asking me to get you pregnant, looking at me with such long eyes, your red cheeks and your sweaty hands.” He whispered in your ear slowly

“You were so nervous, did you think I would deny your request?” He kissed your neck moving his index finger to your sensitive spot “I will never deny you that”

Seungkwan

Seungkwan has always been romantic, and even after his first child was born he continued with this characteristic. Always bringing you flowers when he came home from work, bringing you your favorite chocolate or even asking for your favorite food to be delivered to your door while he was traveling.

So in his head, even though he knew that any basic conversation about having another child would probably end with you agreeing with him and you making the second child, but Seungkwan wanted to win over the second child, he wanted to win over you.

Suddenly Seungkwan would come home with clothes that were smaller than what your son was wearing because he had gotten "confused", sometimes he would take the foods you craved during pregnancy and ask you if it reminded you of anything or even buy a shirt written "big brother" for his son after all he hadn't even seen the print. So when you thought about it, you realized that Seungkwan was already way ahead of you, giving you clues about having another child from the beginning.

-

"Kwannie, if you wanted another baby you just had to tell me" You said on top of him, he had covered your face in shame the moment you discovered his plan and climbed on his dick.

"I didn't want to pressure you" He spoke shakily, you guys fit together so well. You were so magnificent on top of him.

"You deserve another child, and I will never feel pressured by something you do."

Vernon

Vernon has a good relationship with his sister. According to him, he and his sister were always friends and always counted on themselves in situations that their parents were unable to help. You have a good relationship with your brother, and you definitely agree with Vernon's wise words.

Gaining a sibling for both of us was like winning the lottery, receiving the best gift in the world, having a friend of your own blood. So you've definitely come to the conclusion that you're either going to have a couple of children or none at all, and as you're now going out with a five-year-old child, it's time to give the gift that you both managed to receive for the anxious firstborn.

-

“I forgot how addictive you are” Vernon mumbled as you moved on top of him.

“I think I’m going to try to get you pregnant every day from now on.”

Chan

Chan is a chaming person, and he actually its very good at making people do what he wanted, without them even knowing that. So when he saw you as a actual mother, holding your lilttle girl in your arms, Chan knew that all he wanted to do for the rest of his life was making you more and more of a mother and seeing you enjoying your motherhood.

Of course he would help around the house, he wanted to be a good husband/father so you could see his effort and give him a reward (a new baby)

Obviously Chan knew that your first pregnancy was very great and you did not suffer at all coparing to others mothers experience, and he knew if someday you started acting like that, it would be the end of the story. But he couldnt help himself when he saw you all curved up for him, with your tearing eyes begging for another baby

-

"Of couse i will give you another baby." He kissed your forehead as you mumbled below his muscular body

"How can i say no after you look at my so beautiful like that?" He whines in your ear seeing you tremble all up again.

"Such a beautiful mother." And yet again, Chan always get what he wants.

[fanfiction4sooya]

Call her now (Karina x Fem!R)

Just wanted to write something to open my year of writings!! Just had this idea and well... you will know more once you read it. Hope ya'll like it! 💖💖💖

Ps: thanks to each one of you who enjoy my works and engage with it. I really appreciate each one of you babies 🥹💖

cw: fingering, humping, fingering, strapons, a tad bit of voyeurism, yves is here too and she is an asshole, girl on girl action, swearing, aggressiveness, light stalking, possessiveness, nipple play, etc.

You always wondered what exactly what was that girl's job. She came in at the bank you worked for to deposit a lot of cash every week and you just asked for her ID and did the transaction, but those questions ate you alive. It wasn't anything illegal otherwise the bank wouldn't approve her transactions; Stripper? No, the bills are big and strippers usually get smaller ones thrown at them. 'Maybe she works something more expensive...' You thought for the 10th time as she left your work place with a small nod and a charming smile.

You were staring at your computer a week later, a complete wreck since you and your girlfriend broke up and your life turned upside down. She was obsessively trying to talk to you since then, following you everywhere. You were honestly not feeling very safe. but the only way you had was come into work like everyday. You still had to pay your bills after all.

You didn't even realized when Jimin sat down to the other side of your desk, her leather purse full of cash with her as always.

"Good afternoon" Her voice broke you off from your trance, making you slightly jump.

"Oh, jesus" You closed your eyes, startled.

"I didn't mean to scare you" She said. "I've been sitting here for about two minutes and you seemingly didn't see me" Polite and cold as always, but this time she scanned you.

You felt the need to hide from her sharp gaze, run away. You knew you probably looked a mess and you didn't want to appear like that in front of the yoo Jimin.

"Are you okay?" You lowered your eyes, shy as ever and she stared at your buzzing phone. You turned the screen down.

"yes, thank you for asking" You smiled, fixing your glasses on your face and trying your best to keep your composure to 1: not melt at how intensely she was staring at you and 2: not lose it because of the many times your ex has called you since your client was in front of you.

"Bad ending?" Jimin said, once again taking you from your own mind. A simple transaction that supposedly would take less than five minutes was taking way longer.

"I'm sorry, what?"

"Your phone buzzed about 6 times already and before you turned your screen down I saw a trash can emoji followed by 'Ex'" She leaned against the chair, her brown overcoat slightly opening and revealing a black leather dress under it. You gulped, looking away. "So I imagine someone is wanting another chance"

"Uh... yeah" You looked at your computer screen again, finishing her transaction. "Apparently she can't take no for an answer" You said, closing your eyes and mentally slapping your forehead. Too much information.

"She?" Jimin smiled, amused. You gave her the deposit receipt and she got up. "Glad to know I have a chance" She smiled, turning away and stopping at your office's door. "Have a good day, Ms" And she left without waiting any response from you.

You spent the rest of your day thinking of what she said. Was it possible? That woman could be described as a doll, an angel, anything but human and well, not that you thought you were ugly but she was another level of pretty. Your phone buzzed again, but this time you picked it up since you were leaving the bank.

"I told you I don't wanna talk to you" You sounded stern but deep down you were scared. Ha Sooyoung could be menacing when she wanted to.

"But I wanna talk to you" You heard her voice loud and clear right behind you. You turned around and of course she was there, leaning against her motorcycle. That fuckboy attitude present as ever.

A few days prior that would be considered attractive, now it just added to how juvenile her mind could be. Looking back she never took you seriously, you were the least on her priorities but you were too enamored with her to realize all that. Only when she broke up with you saying she needed to "get her freedom back" you came back to your senses.

"please baby, why are you being like this?" She stepped forward so fast she caught your hand without you even realizing. "I said I'm sorry, I wasn't in my right mind" Her eyes scanned you, her nostrils slightly moving as she took in your scent. "I miss you in my mouth" She whispered and your legs almost gave up. Sex with her was really good, another reason for you staying with her for so long.

"First of all, take your hands off of me" You gritted your teeth, pulling your hand away from her grip. "Second: I don't care how much you miss me, I am not going back to you because I can't deal with your indecisiveness anymore, so please leave me alone" You tried to turn around but she held you again.

"Are you going to tell me you don't miss me? Me? The one who taught you what pleasure is?" She sounded more like a jerk than ever. "I know your body with the back of my hand baby..." She got really close to you, everyone that passed you two staring a bit. "You can't find anyone better than me" She spat, letting your arm go in a pushing motion.

It hurt your ego more than your arm have her saying that to you, specially because she knew you very young and inexperienced.

"Hello love, I was waiting for you" You heard her voice before seeing her. Out of nowhere jimin had her arm around your waist, pulling you in for a kiss. You were on your tippy toes because of the height difference, her lips firm against yours as it lasted a few seconds. She let go of you with a smile and soon you heard the other one clearing her throat. Jimin's eyes darkened a bit, defiant. "Who is this, love?" She continued the act and you knew you were profusely blusehd.

"She is..."

"I am her girlfriend" Yves said, pulling your arm and you pulled it back to make her let go of you.

"Oh, is she the trashy ex we were talking about?" Jimin showed her teeth in an imitation of a smile, 'whispering' to your ear. "Oh yeah, not worth it at all" Loud enough for yves to hear. The woman was so astonished she couldn't even think of a proper reply when the taller woman held your hand and you took off with her, taking you to her car. You knew it was a porsche due to your ex's obsession with those fancy cars.

She opened the door for your surprised self, delicately closing it behind you and going around to enter the vehicle. Turning the engine on she waved goodbye to yves (who still had her jaw dropped) and took off.

You were just so surprised that no sound came out of you for a few minutes as you saw the city in a flash of lights due to her speed. She noticed your surprised face, of course.

"You can breathe now" She said, side eyeing you and your pencil skirt, your glasses on the tip of your nose.

"Oh, yeah..." You finally allowed yourself to move. After a moment of the most awkward silence ever known to men you spoke. "Thank you for that..." You started, looking at her direction for one millisecond before blushing too hard. She was so attractive it was maddening. "You didn't have to lie to cover for me..." Your voice sounded small.

"I didn't lie" She stared at you now, turning her head at your direction with her hand still on the steering wheel.

"What do you mean?" You blurted out.

"I was waiting for you to get off work so I could take you home" She stared ahead. You were silent for a moment, thinking.

"You waited for hours just to take me home?"

"Yes"

"That's insane. Weren't you bored?" You said feeling bad for her waiting for you all that time.

"The thought of you entertained me" She half smiled at you.

"What... You are a natural sweet talker" You said, honestly amazed, trying to sound offended but of course you sounded playful.

"I'm a pro at it, love" She kept staring at the road, her side profile prettier than anything you've ever seen. "My place or yours?"

"W-what?" You gripped the side of your skirt, wetness already seeping through your panties with just that question. Jesus, that woman was hot.

"If you wanna go to your place its understandable, I'll gladly take you there and we can grab dinner another time" Her right hand let go of the steering wheel and she placed it on your thigh, looking intensely in your eyes. "If you come with me to my place we are going to fuck all night and tomorrow I'll drop you off at work if you'd like"

You stared at her for an eternity, a million thoughts going through your mind. You thought of saying no; excuses and excuses flowing through your head. You opened your mouth, her warm hand in your thigh making your panties damp.

"Your place"

-🌸🌸🌸-

The lights turned on as soon as you stepped inside; actually, as soon as she stepped inside because now she had your legs trapped behind her back, her hands holding you by the ass and your clothed core grinding hungrily against her stomach. You moaned against her lips when your back finally met the wall and you could really feel the weight of her body against yours.

Her tongue felt so good against yours it was really insane. How did that woman learn how to kiss like that? You tried to chase her lips again when she moved away from yours, whining when she ghosted them over yours just to teasingly smile. You rolled your eyes, scratching her shoulders under the brown overcoat.

Without much effort she kept her way to her bedroom with you on her lap, still holding tightly on her shoulders. She carefully placed you in her bed, straightening her back to look at you, her head cocked to the side like a curious feline as she measured you up and down. To your beautiful face and swollen lips, a mean smile on her lips.

"Fuck I wanted this so bad, love" She crawled to you, your panties were ruined at this point.

For some reason you didn't feel shy at all; not shy, not nervous... anything. You only felt wanted. No, not wanted. You felt needed.

She swiftly pulled you by the ankles, placing herself between your legs and staring from your face to the wet path on your underwear, a glint of arousal visible on her face too.

"you are so beautiful, fucking hell" You throbbed when she said that, her voice raspy and low as if she was speaking to herself and not entirely to you.

"Says the actual goddess over me" You bit your lip, embarrassingly out of breath.

"yet you never seemed to be interested in me" She pulled you by the nape, kissing you hungrily while unbuttoning your blouse all the way down, her fingertips grazing your tummy and making you whimper. "I usually don't go for anyone but I need to have you" she pushed you again to lay down, her tongue swirling against yours made your pussy throb like crazy.

Her tongue and teeth never stopped their assault on your lips, all you could do was whimper and scratch her arms when she traced her fingers down to your drenched cunt. You gasped when she touched your hard clit over the fabric, biting her lip a little too hard.

"Jimin, oh god" Was all you managed to say when she circled your clit a couple of times, rolling your hips each time they moved.

"yes princess, keep calling my name while I make you feel good" She lowered her assault to your neck, knowingly that would give you at least one hickey, smiling when you held her arm to keep it from going away.

It felt too good, and too much at the same time. You body felt feather like and the way she moaned while her hand kept working on your clit made you start convulsing, not really understanding why the fuck were you already cumming when with your ex you only could do it by penetration and clit stimulation.

"jimin, t-too much" you started saying but she kept rubing your swollen clit, a particularly harsh bite making you tip over the edge, squirting all over your panties and her hand. You kept rolling your hips, coming down from your high. "I've never squirted before..." You knit your eyebrows together, a bit surprised.

"Fuck, that useless asshole never made you squirt?" she devilishly smiled, biting her lower lip. She sat on her heels, pulling her dress over her head, her big breasts fully on display now as she quickly undressed you as well, pulling your dripping panties from you with and audible moan. "fuck now I want you squirting all over me" She kissed your thighs, placing herself between them to kiss your mound.

"No, it's your turn..." Pulling her to kiss you again, you thought how much you wanted that woman to be lost in you. "let me touch you, please. I don't really know how to but I wanna make you feel good" You stared into her brown eyes, her doll like features a bit more prominent from up close. She touched your face with her knuckles and that alone made you melt.

Nine times out of ten you bottomed with your ex, which didn't teach you a lot in the matters of being a top. She understandably nodded, softly smiling at you.

"Of course, love" She kissed you again and now you finally had the chance to do something instead of only let her do them to you. "It's okay, take your time" She patiently cooed and you shivered. That was arousing, oh so fucking hot.

You flipped her to be under you, straddling her hips and moaning against her skin when your boobs touched hers. She rolled her eyes and you quickly realized that was a soft spot for her, so you trailed your way down with your tongue, latching on them.

"oh, fuck" She pulled your hair a bit when your lips connected to her nipple. "Harder princess, no need to be soft with me" Jimin said, giving you directions and you clenched around nothing thinking of how hot that felt one more time.

Just now you understood how patience was something you needed in a partner. That guidance and lack of judgement... It gave you a boost of confidence.

You pulled on her nipple with a soft 'pop' and she whined, her eyebrows knit together as she rolled her eyes.

Her hips rolled on their own against yours and you ended up moaning too, sucking harshly on her right nipple while pinching the other. You started to grind down, her clit and yours perfectly grazing each other on that sinful position. She closed her eyes, tossing her head back and holding your hips to bump her clit on yours better while you kept working on her boobs.

"This feels perfect princess, k-keep going" Jimin managed to say between broken moans, the skin slapping sound loud and clear that somebody was fucking.

You were both so wet you could feel it between your legs every time she pushed your hips up to pull them down again against hers. You felt her tightening her grip. Time went both slow and fast, it was insane how turned on you were even by the lightest of touches coming from her.

"I'm gonna cum in your pussy baby, fuck fuck fuck" She gripped even harder, leaving her hand prints on your hips, deeply breathing with her eyes closed, your shiny eyes looking up at her in the most adorable way ever. You looked down to where you were connected and you could literally see how you both creamed on each other.

Coming down from her high jimin smiled at you, pulling you up for a deep kiss. Your heart was thrumming in your ears, that kiss alone making you feel things you didn't feel for the longest time, maybe never.

"Are you feeling okay?" She kissed your neck with you still straddling her and you hummed in response. "Good" She sat down, kissing your lips even more fervently than before, pushing one hand between your bodies to finally touch your pussy. "You are soaked, love" You rolled your eyes, hugging her shoulders when two of her fingers invaded you in one go. "Let's take care of that, hm?" She touch your spongy spot, pumping her fingers hard in and out of you.

You heard your cellphone buzz inside your purse somewhere but not that it mattered now that the most beautiful woman you've ever laid your eyes on was literally fucking you hard enough to take your breath away.

"Can't she take a hint?" She said through gritted teeth, speeding up her pace.

"She'll stop..."You managed to say between a moan. "Eventually" She rolled her eyes.

"God, her insistence makes me wanna fuck you even more" She bit your lip. "Makes me wanna strap you down just so you can call her while calling my name" She said, knuckles deep inside you.

The temptation was too much, the thought of you doing such dirty thing making you clench viciously on her fingers.

"Oh, you want that" She growled, her fingers going to a full stop as she pulled them out of you, taking both to her lips and sucking it to gather your taste on her tongue. "I won't take long" She kissed you and got up. "Pick up your phone and wait for me with your legs open" She commanded.

"Y-yes, ma'am" She went to her closet and you quickly fished for your phone in your purse. In fact, a few missed calls from Sooyoung.

Jimin came back wearing a harness with a strapon, putting on a condom on the big thing. For safety reasons, you assumed.

"And your phone?" She asked, eyes glued on yours.

"She isn't calling anymore..." You said a bit out of breath when she knelt between your legs pulling you to her and laying on her stomach. Her tongue swirled between your folds and your clit, ripping a gutural moan from you. "Jesus"

"Call her now" She said, slurping on your juices. Her tongue in and out of you while her nose bumped your clit.

You did as she said, gripping on the phone for dear life when she turned you around placing you in all fours for her, holding your hips with one of them to play with your folds with the tip of the strap, slapping your clit a few times to make you jolt. Finally the other side of the line picked up.

"Where the fuck are you?" She practically shouted and finally jimin slipped in taking you by surprise and you did your best to swallow the sinful moan you were about to let out.

"I am not at my ap- fuck" You let out when she gave you a particularly hard thrust, the whole thing slipping inside you.

"You look beautiful like this, baby" She said loud enough for Yves to hear.

"What the fuck is going on? Where the fuck are you? I swear to god-"

Jimin picked up pace pulling you into her, your face completely smashed against the expensive sheets as you babbled some incoherent words. She picked the phone from your hand, never stopping what she was doing.

"Oh, hi" Her voice sounded poisonous, her free hand slapping your ass with force and making you cry out. "She is a bit busy now..."

"Jimin, please" You cried out loudly, completely forgetting anything else, the toy hitting your womb was too much to handle. "Please I'm gonna cum, please don't stop" you bit the back of your fingers, the urge to cry getting stronger by the second every time she pounded you.

"WHAT THE FUCK-"

"No need to scream, friend" She pulled you by the hair, your body now completely against hers now. "She is mine now, can you hear that?"She lifted the phone while slamming the dick inside your hole to make your moans even more audible for the other woman. "Bye bye" She said to your screaming ex, throwing your phone on the bed and finally hugging you against her. "I knew it was worth the wait..." She licked your ear lobe then your neck, reaching her hand to your clit, thrusting hard as you came screaming, squirting again all over her legs.

She kept the pace, humping the toy up while holding you for a long while. Her embrace felt strong and protective in some way.

Oh you were doomed.

When she finally took it off you fell onto the bed, limp and sweaty and so wet. She took it off, hugging your limp body and pulling you to lay on top of her on her chest and kissing your forehead, then lips taking in your scent.

"Are you feeling okay?" She said after a while.

"I'm feeling light as a feather" You nudged on her neck, feeling somewhat protected. She was warm and passionate and you really liked that. (authors note: Karina is a fire sign after all)

You finally looked around, taking in the luxurious place you were at.

"Can I ask you something?" You said and she hummed. "Don't get me wrong but I've been dying to ask you..." You placed your chin over your hands on her chest, puppy eyes looking up at her. "What do you work with?" You said making her burst out laughing. After a while she finally managed to pull herself together, looking at you.

"I am a professional domme, love" She said and you went 'Oh'. "Does that bother you?" She asked and you quickly shook your head no.

"No that's not it..." You said. "Now I'm just really thinking... are you taking any applications? I could be an intern..." She laughed out loud, caressing your hair.

"Well I am looking for a business partner..." She pulled you in for a kiss. "But you need to take some mandatory classes first" Her tongue swirled against yours and you whimpered. "Are you still interested?" She said, smiling against your lips.

"Oh you can be sure I'll be the best student you've ever had..." You sat again over her pussy, slightly grinding down and you both moaned, searching for that satisfaction one more time.

Your phone buzzed the whole night until it ran out of battery...

[vanteguccir]

It's noted | Chris Sturniolo

Chris Sturniolo x reader

Summary: Where Y/N is part of the Sturniolo Triplets fandom and makes videos about them on TikTok. After years of creating content, one of her videos seems to catch the attention of none other than Chris.

Warning: None.

Requested?: Yes, from anon.

Author's note: That is my work, I DON'T authorize any plagiarism! | English isn't my first language, so I'm sorry if there's any grammar error.

PS.: I used this tiktoker as an inspiration for the content that the reader creates on this.

PS. 2: I'm thinking of making a tag list for my Sturniolo Triplets x reader, so if you want to be included in it and be tagged on every Sturniolo x reader that I post, comment here please! 🩷

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It was true that the Sturniolo Triplets fandom grew so much in such a short time thanks to the fans themselves, who play a big role in bringing the channel to other people through social media - mainly TikTok. It was also true that, at least 90% of this part of the fandom works with edits of different types of the boys; compilation of parts from a certain video or podcast, edits and even memes.

But there was a small portion that made videos talking about the boys, showing their faces and voices while explaining their content, work and even giving tips on how the triplets themselves could increase their audience or improve their brands.

And Y/N was part of this small portion, having been in the fandom since mid-2021 and not missing any videos of the triplets, she could talk about them for hours on end.

Her biggest hobby was making videos giving ideas for their channel and brands: some brands they could collab with, theme ideas for car videos, topics for podcasts, prints for hoodie sets and t-shirts - both for the triplets' brand and for Fresh Love -, different flavors and themes for Space Camp, and so on.

The girl applied all her love and knowledge to all her videos, editing the backgrounds and explaining her ideas with the smallest details, making them understandable. She had perfect lighting, audio, and set equipment for her work, which made the quality equally good as her content.

Her trademark was her strawberry frappuccino, which she was always drinking every time she turned on her phone camera. Fans joked that her obsession with the drink was like Chris's obsession with Pepsi.

And all that was exactly why fans loved her so much. Y/N had more than 400 thousand followers on her TikTok account and all her videos reached an average of 150 thousand likes, in addition to the many comments saying how smart she was for having those ideas, her kindness in sharing them with the public and even complementing her beauty.

The girl spent hours of her day reading each one of them and interacting with fans as if they were best friends, always being very kind. She laughed her ass off at the comments from people who madly tagged the boys, especially Chris, as it was a well-known fact that he was her favorite - she loved to make that very clear.

Some fans even went so far as to say that if Chris was ever ready to get romantically involved with someone again, they wanted it to be with Y/N. The girl read that type of comment with a huge smile on her face and red cheeks, feeling honored. Although she imagined that the boys would never even notice her, she allowed herself to travel through the world of delusion from time to time.

So it was an understandment to say that she was super surprised when, after waking up on a typical Saturday and picking up her phone for the first time in the day before even getting out of bed - a bad habit of hers -, she saw the notifications in triple the volume of its normal.

She felt dizzy with so much information, trying to find in the midst of so many comments and messages what was really happening.

Finally, after traveling between her TikTok, Instagram, and Twitter for long minutes, she finally found it.

Chris Sturniolo had commented on her last video.

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It was Friday, and the triplets had just returned home after finishing recording their new car video that would be posted in a few hours.

Chris was currently lying in his bed, the lights in his room dimmed, and the low noise coming from his phone filling the four walls.

The brunette was just getting ready to take a shower minutes ago, having opened his TikTok and scrolling through his For You for a few minutes, about to take off his clothes used in the filming, when a video of an unknown girl talking about himself caught his attention.

It was very normal to have videos of and about himself on his For You, after all, the hours over the last few years that he spent liking one video or another showed the algorithm that he liked this type of content. Edits and memes of him alone or with his brothers filled his app, and he spent enough time watching, laughing, liking, and, sometimes, reposting some of them.

But it wasn't normal for him to have a completely unknown person talking directly about him, with her face and voice exposed for the world while doing it. And what surprised him most was what she was talking about, that specific video being about different prints and colors that he could use in the next Fresh Love collection.

His blue eyes lingered too long on the girl's face, admiring her features, her sweet voice serving as a melody for his ears.

When Chris dragged his thumb from the right to the left of his screen, entering the girl's profile, he finally noticed her name.

"Y/N." His voice came out in a whisper, enjoying more than necessary how the name slipped off his tongue so easily.

His fingers wandered across the screen, going from one video to another, listening to the ideas carefully - even writing some down on his Notes app -, saving some in a separate folder and browsing the comments, only then realizing that practically all of them were from fans tagging him.

Laughter escaped his lips at some of the jokes the girl made every now and then, while fascination filled his eyes with the effort she put into each idea.

The sound of knocking against his bedroom door startled him, his body jumping as he turned sharply towards the source of it, Matt's head appearing between his door and the frame, his eyebrows furrowed as his eyes traveled around the room briefly.

"You've been listening to this girl for so many hours that I thought she was here with you." Matt commented, opening the door wider and approaching Chris.

The youngest of the triplets rolled his eyes, suppressing the urge to lock his phone screen and keep Y/N all to himself, but she was well known in the fandom and her videos were about him and his brothers, the possibility of her content getting to them as quickly as it got to him was huge.

"It's a girl who appeared on my For You today. She makes videos of ideas for our channel and brands, can you believe it?" Chris looked at Matt as he showed his phone screen with Y/N's profile open. His eyes were wide with fascination, and his lips stretched into an enthusiastic smile.

Matt observed him for a few seconds, noticing his body language and the way he spoke about the girl, it was different from all the other times the boy commented about tiktokers or videos others made about them.

"Send me a video of her, I'll take a look later. Now go upstairs, I bought us something to eat."

༻﹡﹡﹡﹡﹡﹡﹡༺

Another Monday had arrived, and Y/N was looking for strength in her body to get out of bed and face another start of the week.

The thought that in a few hours, she would have a brand new Sturniolo Triplets podcast was what made her tackle her tasks.

Her eyes traveled to the time on her phone and to her notification bar every 10 minutes, as if she was expecting Nick to release the podcast earlier than usual - it was obvious that that wasn't going to happen.

After last Saturday, where she had woken up to a comment from none other than Christopher Sturniolo, her weekend was complete madness.

She spent hours staring at the little comment as her mind tried to process whether she was actually awake or still asleep and in a very good dream.

"loved the idea! it's noted ;)"

"it's noted"? What did that even mean? Did he actually write down her idea for future use? Should she be prepared to wake up some other day and see that he has launched a new collection with something she suggested in one of her videos?

And what made her go crazy the most was that Chris Sturniolo had seen her face, and not only that, he found her attractive enough and her idea creative enough to watch it until the end.

She spent almost the entire previous two days waiting for him to comment again, or even like one of her videos, but that didn't happen. Instead, Y/N received thousands of comments from fans going crazy with her about what happened. At least she had a good laugh with them.

Now, she was in her bedroom, the light from the movie playing on the TV was the only source of illumination. Y/N was lying in her bed, already in her pajamas and with her pre-bed cup of cappuccino on her lap, keeping her legs warm, her eyes on the television, but her mind somewhere else.

The sound of the YouTube notification came from her phone and Y/N had never moved so quickly, her hand taking the device out of her bedside table and unlocking the screen while muting the television, clicking on it with her thumb without even looking at the other notifications.

Her fingers worked on increasing the volume and screen brightness, setting it to the best resolution and getting comfortable on her bed, preparing to stay in that position for the next hour.

The podcast was already at minute 35, and Y/N felt her cheeks hurting from how much she was laughing at the topics brought up by the boys. Nick was especially funny that day, making Chris and Matt laugh at every moment.

In addition to the senseless fights that would arise between the three of them out of nowhere, which made Y/N roll her eyes playfully, already accustomed to their way with each other.

Until her big smile was replaced by an expression of a mixture of fright and surprise.

"Can we take a moment to talk about the intense crush Chris developed this weekend?" Nick interrupted Matt's laughter, taking a sip of his Doctor Pepper.

Chris turned abruptly to his brother, his eyes wide at the comment as he shook his head, almost begging through telepathy for him not to talk about that.

"It's true, Chris spent the weekend obsessing over a fan of ours who makes videos on TikTok with different ideas for our channel." Matt agreed, looking briefly at Nick while his hands moved the microphone support, pressing his lips together as he tried to suppress his laughter at Chris's reaction.

"Yeah, she is super pretty, and her ideas are very interesting. I think I only saw her profile once, but I listened to all her videos through Chris's phone." Nick continued, raising his right hand and directing his palm towards Chris, pretending to cover his figure with it and ignoring his desperate expression. "He literally spent the entire weekend watching her."

"Her name is Y/N. Search for her guys. We might even use one of her ideas on our next podcast." Matt added, his voice coming out low despite his mouth being almost glued to the microphone.

"You guys are horrible, I hate you." Despite the distance, the camera lens that focused on Chris's image captured his red cheeks as he tried to suppress a smile at the thought of the girl who took over his thoughts, rolling his eyes to his brothers.

"Now he will be silent for the next 10 minutes." Nick continued, amusement in his voice as he picked up his Space Camp watermelon lip balm, playing with the object in his hands.

"He's in love Nick, give him some credit." Matt mocked alongside the oldest triplet, a small smile on his face as his eyes watched his brother's reaction.

"Okay, next topic." Chris interrupted loudly, his voice cracking with embarrassment. He raised his arms and moved them from side to side exasperatedly, earning laughter from the other two, before Nick briefly passed his eyes on the document open on his laptop, starting the next topic.

"Oh my God." Y/N whispered, clicking once on the screen and dragging the small ball in the bottom bar to the left, going back a few minutes of the podcast and rewatching that specific part.

The girl repeated that action at least three more times, her brain still processing that Chris Sturniolo had been watching her TikToks all weekend - as if she were some kind of famous artist - and that, apparently, he was developing a mini crush on her as well.

Her heart was beating too fast to be normal as her cheeks burned, a red tinge taking over her skin. Goosebumps ran through her body as her fingers trembled slightly. Her jaw was already hurting from the time she held her mouth open, but no sound escaped from it.

A notification suddenly appearing at the top of the screen caught her eye, her right hand instantly flying to her mouth while her left hand lowered her phone, resting the device on her mattress.

Her eyes were now fixed on the wall in front of her bed, as her mind screamed at herself.

christopherturniolo sent you a direct message.

"hey!"

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My asks are always open. Feel free to send requests or anything at all 🩷💋

Also, again, I'm thinking of making a tag list for my Sturniolo Triplets x reader, so if you want to be included in it and be tagged on every Sturniolo x reader that I post, comment here please! 🩷

Asked tags: @lustfulslxt @soimightlikeoldmen69 @p1xieswrld @lovrejoana

[dumbseee]

Request if your requests are open

Singer!Reader x (driver of your choice)

After their break up she seems fine, takes a 3-day break up off social media but otherwise she's the same as before, so people keep judging her for not being sad enough :(. cuz the driver seems sad and isn't doing well in races but she doesn't show anything and they attack her etc.(not a BIG hate campaign but ppl just make assumptions abt it)

Thanks in advance

Then BOOM she releases "hits different" (by taylor swift) and the fans connect the dots between her relationship and the song

happy face.

charles leclerc x singer!reader.

fc: madison beer.

note: thanks for the request! i really like your idea i hope you don’t mind that i used charles as the driver!

liked by selenagomez, kaiagerber, kyliejenner and 2 891 009 others.

y/n: mother is back.

_

fan1: YEEESSSSSS

fan2: she broke up with charles after three years together and took just three days off social media? that girl is so weird…

fan3: right? while charles is miserable and all sad

fan4: omg y’all are so ANNOYING let my girl enjoy her single life

theweeknd: 🔥

fan5: even if she decided to come back after one minute, that’s her choice

fan6: y’all just love to hate on pretty girls

fan7: charles saw the gold digger in her and left lmao

fan8: gold digger where? homegirl was a billionaire before she was even born LMAO

fan9: don’t come for my girl

fan10: charles’s fans back at it again

fan11: at least she’ll be free from the vultures

fan12: i never liked her tbh

fan13: how can she party and smile like that after a break up?

fan14: i feel so bad for charles…

fan15: charles deserves so much more

view all comments.

liked by arianagrande, zendaya, zayn and 3 910 009 others.

y/n: ‘hits different’ is now out :) ps: reminder to be kind to people.

_

comments have been disabled.

liked by hunterschaffer, arthur_leclerc, carla.brocker and 4 819 009 others.

y/n: thanks you so much for the love ‘hits different’ received! it is my most vulnerable piece of work and putting it out there was hard, but i knew i had to. break ups are never easy, no matter how happy someone can be on the outside, they may be battling their hardest battles inside. but i’ll get better, like they say, what doesn’t kill you makes you stronger.

_

fan1: i’m crying while reading this because it hits so hard, i’m in the middle of a break up and it hurt so bad, thank you y/n.

liked by y/n.

fan2: with one song she managed to put the whole world on pause

fan3: this woman’s lyrics are INSANE they never miss

fan4: she wrote it with her heart it hits so hard

fan5: the way the internet bullied her because she wasn’t « sad enough » is insane to me like wtf??

fan6: you never know what someone is going through behind closed doors, let’s be nicer to each other guys

fan7: i’m sorry but these people are just dumb, she stayed with that guy for YEARS ofc she’s going to be sad

fan8: nah but she clearly confirmed that charles is the one who ended the relationship, so why isn’t he receiving hate?

fan9: i feel so bad for her

fan10: QUEEN

taylorswift: genius!

view all comments.

taglist: @ferrariloverr

[whore-4-drewstarkey]

The Night We Met Pt. 2 - Dad!Rafe Cameron x Fem!Reader

Summary: when rafe finds out that his and Y/N son is slowly going down the same path he did, he decides to open up to their son about his past.

Warning: lots of angst (sorry), heavy drug use, drug overdose talk, alcohol consumption, physical violence, dark themes basically. (so sorry). lmk if i forgot any!! PLEASE DONT READ IF ANY OF THESE WARNINGS TRIGGER YOU!!!

A/N: i did a poll to see which fic you all wanted and this was the winner. i can’t remember how this idea popped in my head but it did. i really hope you all enjoy this one!! FEEDBACK IS ALWAYS WELCOMED! PLEASE BE KIND<33 ps remember to share and like!

W/C: 3.6k+ (holy fuck)

it had been seventeen years since Y/N and rafe had gotten married. the two of them had a son together, archie, who had just turned sixteen years-old. archie had definitely taken after his father looks. he was tall, with dirty blonde hair, and striking blue eyes that would catch anyone’s attention. he had also taken after his fathers athletic abilities, as he was the star quarterback for the kook academy on kildare island. but, unfortunately the worst way he took after his father, was the intense drug use that was slowly starting to make him an addict; just like his father, rafe cameron, was a mere twenty-one years-ago.

as archie had left for school one friday morning on figure eight, Y/N had entered his room to grab his dirty clothes to wash. as she’d grabbed some of his clothes, a small plastic bag had fallen from one of his khaki pants pockets, and onto the wooden floor of his bedroom next to Y/N feet. bending down, Y/N picked the small packet up to investigate it a little more, until realization hit, as tears began to brim her eyes. it was a packet of cocaine. the only thing she felt like she needed to do in that moment was call her husband who’d been in his office downtown at the cameron development. so she did. she immediately pulled out her phone and pressed rafes contact name, waiting for him to pick up as it rang through her ear.

“baby, what’s up? everything okay? you never call while i’m at work” rafe asked Y/N warily as he sat his falcon pen back down on his oak desk, ignoring the documents that needed his signature.

“i-i think y-you n-need t-t-to come home now” Y/N managed to stutter out, laundry basket long forgotten as she’d made her way to rafes home office, where there was the most privacy.

“what? why? baby, tell me what’s wrong” he insisted.

Y/N swallowed sharply before she began to stutter, and beat around the bush, not wanting to trigger him, “i-i found something i-in archie’s bed-bedroom, but i-i want to wa-warn you, i do-don’t want you tr-triggered hunny”

and in that instant, as soon as she said the world ‘trigger’, he knew she’d found not only drugs, but his old drug of choice; cocaine, in their sons bedroom. he let out a shaky breath of air, as he brought his left hand up to run through his shaggy curtain bangs he’d been growing out from his old buzzcut. “i’ll be home in ten, please don’t worry about me and my trigger, i’ll be fine hunny” he reassured his wife of seventeen-years. and with that he hung up immediately, leaving his office and telling his assistant it was family matters.

as soon as rafe put his porsche in park in the driveway, he ran into his and Y/N house which was located on figure eight, calling out Y/N name, “Y/N WHERE ARE YOU BABY? Y/N???!”

“keep it down rafael, i’m in your office you dumbass” she hushed her husband as she walked out of the french doors that lead to the said room. she grabbed his wrist and yanked him into his office, before she started to cry all over again.

rafe quickly wrapped Y/N into his arms, sending her hushed murmurs of comfort and love, easing her to calm down. she was so heartbroken her little boy was going down the same awful path his father once did. it was hard enough for her to have found rafe almost dead after his overdose twenty-one years ago. she had to go to a couple of years of therapy to recover from that incident. she couldn’t even bare the thought about losing her only child to the same demons that almost took rafe out years before. she clutched onto rafe’s forearm as he held her tight into his arms, trying to steady her shaky frame. he swiftly moved the two of them to his office chair located behind his desk, sitting down and bringing her into his lap where he continued to cradle her fragile head. he pecked her head repeatedly before speaking softly, “hey. hey, Y/N look at me hunny” as he held her cheeks to make her look at him. and in that moment his heart shattered. seeing the love of his life hurt tremendously broke him to his core. swiping some of her tears away with the pads of his thumbs he began to speak again, “we will figure this out love. we will get him the help he needs. i’ll do right by him since my father never could for me. he will be okay. i promise. even if i have to tell him about my addiction. got it sweetheart?” and with that, Y/N bit her bottom lip, and nodded her head to rafe’s reassurance.

“good, now, where is it? i promise i will be fine, you don’t have to worry about me. okay?” rafe asked Y/N as he lightly brushed her curtain bangs back behind her ear with the back of his hand, bringing his lips to hers for a delicate but loving kiss. she placed one of her shaky hands to his scruff covered cheeks, stroking his cheekbone softly, “promise you’ll be fine?”

“promise” he cooed as he grabbed her hand that had been stroking his cheekbone and placed a chaste kiss to the palm of it. she then used her other hand to grab the bag of white powder from her sweatshirt pocket, dropping it in rafe’s large, veiny hand.

“how are we going to approach him about it? you are the expert on this kinda stuff aren’t you?” Y/N attempted to tease rafe to lighten the mood. she’d always had a dark sense of humor, just like rafe.

smirking rafe responded,” hahaha very funny. i mean i am i guess? i know how not to approach him if that helps.”

“how so?”

“as long as we don’t do what ward would do, i think we will be fine baby” rafe sighed out at the mention of his fathers name. a cold-hearted man is what he was. was no father to rafe…. ever. hell, he didn’t even acknowledge him as his father these days, only called the man by his name.

“i guess you’re right” Y/N sighed as she stood back up, preparing herself for what was to come in the next few hours.

“we got this baby, we got this. yeah?” rafe once again tried to reassure the woman of his dreams as she nodded her head in response.

——————-

rafe and Y/N had taken a seat on the living room couch as they waited for their beloved son archie to arrive home from school. he’d football practice, but had received a text from rafe demanding him to come home and skip the practice, adding in that he had already talked to archie’s coach, excusing his absence. archie, being just like his father was, obligated to make his father happy, came home in a hurry.

when the front door opened frantically, followed by hurried steps and commotion, Y/N scooted closer to rafe for comfort. she didn’t know what was going to happen or how it would go down. rafe placed his large, veiny hand on her thigh, giving it a light squeeze for reassurance that everything would be okay in the end.

“we’re in here archie!” rafe had hollered from the living room couch as he and Y/N both waited anxiously for archie to arrive.

“h-hey, what’s up? what was so important that i had to miss practice?” archie questioned as rafe motioned for him to take a seat on the couch opposite of the one Y/N and him were seated on.

“umm archie, your mom went to your room this morning to do your laundry and found something a little concerning. i wanna state that we aren’t blaming you and we aren’t criticizing you whatsoever bud, we love you and want the best for you” rafe spoke warily to his and Y/N young son who sat opposite of them, with worried eyes. archie knew immediately what Y/N found when his father said laundry. he had forgotten to put his drug of choice in his secret spot in his dresser.

rafe continued before archie could even speak a word, “ archie, bud, i get it. i know the high is great and all. i know what you’re going through a-“ rafe had been cut off mid sentence by a triggered archie who had begun to yell at his father.

“really? how in the hell would you, of all people understand how good it makes me feel when i get a little bit of a kick?”

and with that outburst and those words coming from his precious archie, came rafe’s sadness and anxiousness. he had to tell him about his addiction and more specifically; he had to tell him about his overdose that dreadful night Y/N had found him in his bedroom. frustratedly, he pinched the bridge of his nose, exhaling loudly as he tried to find the words to tell archie about his horrible past. he tried to sniffle back some tears, but gave up as he had remembered the only reason why he used to hold back his emotions; his father. so, he let a few tears fall down his stubbled cheeks as Y/N had an arm around his shoulders rubbing his back while the other rubbed his inner thigh to comfort him, all while whispering sweet nothings only rafe and her could hear.

“you got this” she whispered as he raised his head again to make eye contact with archie.

“archie…” he started as he composed himself for what he was about to say. “when i was your age, i used to go out and party a lot. when i first started doing cocaine i was only fifteen years-old. nobody knew in my family. hell, it’s not like anyone would have even cared if they had known anyways” rafe shook his head as he took a deep breath to continue.

“and by the time i was seventeen, all i did was party, drink, snort cocaine and get into a lot of physical altercations. i was heavily addicted to the drug. and some of those altercations i had were so bad that some people were even hospitalized. i was not a good person and i sure as hell was a danger to myself and those who were around me.” he swallowed the lump in the back of his throat as he was about to tell archie about a time when he had hurt topper so bad he had to go to the hospital for many reasons. he still couldn’t recall what had happened that night. and yet for some odd reason, topper was still his best friend to this day minus Y/N, she would be his bestest friend til death do them part.

“once, i got so high that when your uncle topper tried to get me to ease up on the lines and shots and get me to go home, i literally blacked out and beat the living shit out of him. he was hospitalized for two days. i broke two of his ribs, his nose, many lacerations from a beer bottle and a concussion. cocaine, let alone any drug for that matter, is not the answer to anyone’s problems. i would know” he pleaded with archie as rafe’s face scrunched up in hurt as he remembered the aftermath of that fight like it was yesterday.

“b-but, buddy, what’s worse is the night i overdosed on cocaine when i was seventeen years-old, twenty-one years ago. if it weren’t for your mom coming over to find your aunt sarah to do some project for school, i wouldn’t be here right now. it was your fucking mother who found me being delirious and aggressive. i almost hit her because i was so out of my mind. but then before i could do anything, i passed out and went out cold, all while my heart almost stopped beating” rafe croaked out as Y/N continued to rub rafe’s back as this had always been a tough subject to talk about after she had told him she was the one who’d found him that night. he continued again once he cleared his throat, “that night i had done a few extra lines and what i didn’t know at the time was that they were laced with small amounts of fentanyl and that’s why my heart rate was so low. i had to have THREE doses of NAR-CAN archie. and then i went into a 2-day coma” rafe started to cry again, not from the remembrance of that night but to the idea that that could be his boy one day.

“i-i didn’t know that dad” archie stuttered out as he looked down to his lap.

rafe continued, “my dad was so adamant about keeping the fentanyl part private that he paid people off so it wouldn’t ruin his deals. and he scrutinized me for doing drugs. he never asked me why. and sure as hell never really cared about me. i promised myself i would do right by you since my father never could do right by me. so that’s why we’re talking and not judging you for your choices.”

“why did you do it?” archie asked his father the question very few people had ever asked him throughout these 23 years since he’d first been introduced to that drug.

rafe, who’d been taken aback responded with a shake of the head confused, “wait what?”

“why did you start using?”

“um, my mom had died when i was ten and from that point on i wasn’t okay mentally. i didn’t have the love a child needs from their mother, instead i had a greedy, self centered, physically and emotionally abusive, selfish man for a father. he only ever seemed to care more about both of your aunts, money and my step mom, than he did me. he would hardly even look my way. he never truly loved me. so when i got to the kook academy and went to my first party, i was offered a line and took it. it made me feel what i thought was happy but looking back at it i just felt numb. but it was just a way for me to forget about my own shit and past and my emotions. using cocaine allowed me to forget everything that had happened. but with it came hurting others i loved and cared about. which is more important to me than myself. i’d do anything to go back and not get addicted. i hated hurting the ones i loved most. and it took years to build my relationships back up all because of my addiction. addiction is a demon. i’m lucky i got clean. you’re lucky you have us, supportive parents who will be there for you every step of the way” rafe spoke with passion as he looked deep into his boys blue eyes that had resembled his own.

“dad, i’m scared. how do i even get clean? how’d you get clean?”

“baby, archie, i don’t wanna find you like i found your father. that night was the scariest night of my life. i had ptsd from that night and had to go to therapy for a few years due to it. i don’t know if i can do that again, especially if it’s you hunny” Y/N cooed as she leaned forward to caress her boy’s face, pushing back his curtain bangs that resembled his fathers when he was his age.

“arch, it’s okay to be scared. hell, i was so scared when i woke up in the hospital and the doctor told my dad and i that i had overdosed on cocaine and fentanyl. when i heard that i wanted to get clean, but i was so scared. and my father had always told me anytime i showed emotion of any kind, to man up. to not show emotion. that’s what lead me to the drugs in the first place. embrace your emotions bud. even if it means you’re scared. it’s healthier that way.” rafe attempted to explain how he felt about expressing one’s emotions.

prepared to answer the second half of archie’s question rafe took an even breath in and out before he spoke, “i got clean probably the worst and most painful way you can do it. i went cold turkey. which takes a lot of determination. after seeing your aunts so scared, i wanted oh-so badly to get clean. but i was hard on the drug. i had gone to another party one night my senior year of high school, and had just quit two days before, when i met your mom. well i thought that was the first time i’d met her because in reality i had no recollection of the night of my overdose. had no idea your mom was the one who’d saved my life. anywho, i basically felt drawn to her and just being around her and talking to her kept me grounded and in line with what i needed to do. and that was get clean. i couldn’t go to a rehab because then my fathers business partners would’ve heard and his deals would’ve fallen through. so i did it on my own. but archie buddy, if your addiction is as bad as mine was by the time i was sixteen, then i want you to know your mom and i want to put you in rehab. it’s the healthiest and best way to get clean”

“i-i never knew that dad. i-i’m sorry. and mom used to go to parties?” archie frowned, as he tried to lighten the mood just slightly, earning a small chuckle from both of his parents.

“and that’s why i’m telling you bud. and yeah your mom was one hell of a beer pong partner” rafe smirked as he side-eyed his wife Y/N. “but arch, bud, i need to know, how often do you use? i promise i won’t judge you. okay? i’ve been through this same boat years ago. i’m here for you. we’re here for you” rafe cocked an eyebrow up as he questioned his only son.

“every other day sometimes every day. it just depends. i only started doing it after my injury last football season. yah know, when i broke my wrist? i was just so upset and frustrated that i couldn’t play for the rest of the season and then before i knew it, i was addicted i guess” archie huffed out in anger, just like his father used to do all those years ago. just thinking about how easily he got addicted to the drug pissed him off beyond means. the boy just wanted to get clean.

“fuck” rafe sighed as he bent his head down in his large hands. how had he not even noticed the change in archie? why hadn’t he even thought about how that injury could’ve affected him mentally? was it because he’d been working so much? was he just a horrible father like his own dad was? tears began to brim his eyes once again.

“dad, don’t feel bad about this please. it’s not your fault. i already know that you’re thinking you’ve being working too much and that’s why you haven’t noticed. that’s not true. i’ve just been hiding it really well” archie, spoke to his father as tears brimmed his own eyes now.

“i’m trying not to archie. it’s just hard. are you open to going to rehab or not?” rafe questioned as he lifted his head, swallowed his pride, and pushed back his tears to stay strong for archie and Y/N during these hard times. “i just want to express to you buddy, how lucky you are. this is a great opportunity. you’re lucky to have parents who truly care and love you because i never had that after my mom passed. and we both want the best for you” he continued on.

“of course i’ll go” archie quivered out as he looked at both of his parents. he felt so guilty to have put them through such a mess. especially his mother, Y/N, as she’d been through almost losing rafe all those years ago. he couldn’t even imagine the damage that must’ve done to her mentally when she found him. and to think that that could be him next that she found broke his heart to a thousand pieces.

“i-im sorry” the sixteen year-old boy croaked out to his two loving parents as he lunged forward to hug them both.

“we love you too baby, and we’re gonna get you the help you need” Y/N cooed to her little boy as she pecked his head.

“we’ll get you the help i never got, bud, okay? you’re gonna get through this, okay? got it?” rafe asked his son as he held archie’s face in his hands, making eye contact.

“yeah. im a cameron, of course i got this” he chuckled. “us cameron’s are stubborn and can make it through anything. right?” he questioned his father as he looked up at him.

“damn right. i love you archie, and i’m proud of you for taking such a big step. you’re gonna get clean and you’re gonna stay clean” he patted his son’s cheek as the three soaked in the last of their presence’s before archie left for rehab.

rafe sighed with a smile. he knew archie would get better…. after all he is a cameron for christ sake. ‘it’s hard to get rid of them’ he thought to himself as archie left that night for rehab. he smiled to himself because he knew in the end it would all work out. it always did for a cameron.

@slut4drudy @runningfrom2am @maybankslover

[sunfyresrider]

Love & Ruin 2

Synopsis: After being hidden away for most of your life your mother decided to stop being protective. However, there is one rule you cannot break, DO NOT associate with your uncle Aegon. Of course, it's the first thing you do, and you both quickly realize you will be each other's inevitable downfalls.

Pairing: Aegon Targaryen x You (daughter of Rhaenyra) Warnings: cursing, smut, dubcon, more smut, manipulation, possible murder, obsessive tendencies, incest, SEVERE mental illness, helaemond is canon, failed plots, a disaster wedding, just targ things, too many warnings to count honestly Word count: 10k Note: I am a bad person. Im sorry it took me so long to finish but my life is a cluster fuck of bad and worse and it is a blessing I havent yeeted myself into hell. Pt three is alr in the works unlike this one. PS Helaena's and Aemond's plan did work. I just didn't directly mention what it was...yet. Anyway, I hope you enjoy (if you're still interested) Tags: @lovelykhaleesiii @caffein8me @llearlert @introverbatim @ladybug0095 @yazzzmints @heavenly1927 @rinirinse @aelora-a (srry it didn't let me tag some of you.)

“Be quiet,” Aegon growled into the ear of the whore he chose to warm his bed this morning. The squelching sounds of his thrusts slamming into her cunt echoed throughout the room. She stifled a moan and dug her teeth into the pillow below her head. Her voice did nothing, only reminded him he wasn’t you. Aegon tried to get girls who resembled you but none pleased him the same. 

Today was an especially bad day for Aegon and mayhaps he was taking it out on the whore too much. Her cheeks were stained red from his slaps and surely her cervix would be bruised by how hard he was pounding himself into her. He had good reason though; you were returning home.

It took five years, but he almost was able to move forward with his life. You still plagued him in his dreams and there was a constant tugging at his heart everytime your name was brought up. You simply existing reminded him of the only time he was ever happy, and he clung to the memory like a baby clings to their mother's tit. 

His family was very determined to keep you away. It worked successfully, he hadn’t heard nor seen from you at all. Every letter, every flight, every potential unsavory way of stalking your whereabouts was immediately dispelled. That was only within the first year, at some point he gave up. Aegon knew you would come back at some point; you were in love with him. But days, weeks, months, and years passed and still he received nothing. 

The idea they had turned you against him murdered the last bit of hope he had. It was one of the many things that formed him into the ‘monster’ everyone believed him to be. The first was being born the first son yet being ignored for his elder sister his entire life. The night at Driftmark was the second trauma that seared a mark into his heart and brother's face forever. The third was the forceful marriage to his sister.

Aegon scarcely remembers that day or the night afterwards. He used milk of the poppy to ease his mind to the point he could hardly stand during the vows… he doesn’t know if he actually attended the first dance. He does remember the bedding and it makes his skin crawl. 

He was forced to walk into and perform his own rape. He didn’t want it and would never want it. There was no daydream or drug strong enough to make him forget. It was awful in every sense of the word. Aegon cried during it and then he cried after it. No matter how much he scrubbed himself in the bathing chambers he could not free himself of the feeling of disgust. Then there was the overwhelming guilt that came after. 

Aegon never touched her again, never really interacted with his own children. Why would he? He was an accomplice in her suffering as much as his own. She didn’t want to marry him either, she didn’t want to bear his children. He could never be a good husband, lover or anything of the sort to Helaena. She deserved it, he thought, to have someone who could care for her. Someone who could love her like a wife… not like a sibling.

But that would never be him and it ate him alive like the disease killing their father. She was too kind, too pure for him or any other man at court. She was stupid, yes, but with a larger heart than any of the women he’s met combined. Yet, he never brought himself to do his duty to stay loyal and cherish her like Alicent told him to. The only good thing he ever did for Hel was leaving her alone, it made her happy to be free of him. In truth, it would make everyone happier if the world was rid of him completely. 

Maybe his life wasn’t over yet, maybe there was still a shred of hope for him left in the world. The reason he used to be happy was returning to him. Even if it was to marry another man… He could sort that out easily enough. When Aegon first heard the news, he wasn’t as calm. He 

He could take back what was his and become the man everyone wants him to be… Or he’ll drag you down into his depravity with him. It didn’t matter, either option was a severe improvement from the existence he was currently suffering. 

“Are you ready to be back?” Jacaerys inquired whilst trying to tame the loose curls on his head. The carriage ride from the doc to the keep had proved to be dreadfully long and boring. Luke was seeping anxiety that made the entire car tense. ‘Aemond, Aemond, Aemond, he’s gonna take my eye! He’s gonna kill me if I go back!’ The chants of a scared kid really did threaten to send you over the edge. ‘Just apologize, Lucerys... He’s not going to do anything while grandsire is alive. Nothing is going to happen, just say sorry before it does.’ 

Everything you said fell on deaf ears. His fear was expected, he took his uncle's eye and received no punishment. Granted, after hearing both sides it seemed inevitable for someone to get gravely injured. You still genuinely believed or at least convinced yourself a simple apology might just keep Luke alive for a few more years. “No brother, I would rather be at home,” you muttered in a near whisper. 

Jace, always the obedient son, was oozing confidence completely unbothered by the situation. He learned that from Daemon, never let them see you falter, especially the Hightower cunts. “It’s because of him, isn’t it?” 

Your heart clenched, a sorrowful reminder of your childhood beginning to boil to the surface. A whirlwind of memories threatening to break you. 

You learned how truly codependent you were on your uncle. Without him you had become a shell of whatever it was you once were. Your insecurities reigned supreme as you had an insatiable need for approval from everyone. That meant doing everything you were asked and then some to become the greatest version of yourself you could be. You took care of people, especially your brothers whom you felt the full burden for. You were the eldest and you allowed them into a situation that got them hurt and another child maimed. 

It wasn’t just your insecurities; your moods would take a turn quicker than before. At the drop of a hat, you could be raging or hysterically crying. Sometimes you didn’t even understand why. You became obsessive over little things that didn’t matter in the grand scheme of things. For example: how your dresses were fitted, how your hair was styled, and what you ate and drank. It wasn’t in the front of your mind at the time, but you did things in the way he always preferred. 

Without him, deciding on things became hard. You never needed to think before because he did it for you. Not only that but you became a chronic liar. It wasn’t on purpose, sometimes things would just slip out. You were great at denying any problems you had and chalking them up to your blood moon. You denied any relationship with Aegon and defended him more than he deserved. Especially since he so carelessly abandoned you. No letters, no visits, he left you with fucking nothing. You started to convince yourself you never loved him; it was just pity. You had a burning desire to rescue him and mistook it for genuine affections. 

Four years ago, almost to this very day the invitation to the prince and princess’s wedding had just reached your doorstep. You learned that day just how much you did love him because when the letter was read you cried so much you vomited. You stopped eating, stopped sleeping, stopped doing all the things you love and rotted in your bed waiting for the pain to subside… Or for the stranger to take you. 

The image of him touching her the same way he did you, the idea of him whispering the same things he did to you, the way she would cry out his name like you did… It made you want to rip your hair out and peel your skin off. She probably had an extremely elegant dress; the throne room was probably filled with music and guests, and they would ride their dragons together to show off their union… You tore all the clothes he liked to shreds and punched a hole in your mirror… 

Originally, you never had any disdain for your exceedingly kind and misunderstood aunt but now it was pure untamed hatred. The jealousy was incredible, truly you would be confined to a prison cell if you acted on the things you thought up. 

You could kill both of them and end the war before it even started. You prayed she would miscarry the twins, it didn’t happen. You prayed he would get too drunk and die from alcohol poisoning, obviously it didn’t happen. You prayed the entire keep would be set on fire and everyone within it would die burning in flames just as your father did… it did not. 

You were never good enough for him. He abandoned you and left you to rot after taking something so important from you. You were a fool, a naive idiot. The fear of being abandoned personified ever more when your mother gave birth to two legitimate children. Everyone was going to abandon you and it was driving you insane. You had mastered the art of pretending, no one was able to tell what was underneath the surface. 

Jacaerys was really the only person who noticed the change. He was the only one who saw through your lies and facade. And he was the only one who genuinely helped you overcome the complete insanity you had sunk into. He pulled you out from drowning in a sea of madness and kept you afloat ever since. In turn, you felt a little guilty for your wicked thoughts and desires, but you were atoning for them by good will and actions. 

Still, sometimes late at night when you were alone, he would come back. The memories would come flooding in and sleep would evade you. He had burned a scar into your heart that never fully healed and probably never would. According to your mother who said the first heartbreak is always the worst and most memorable. You didn’t want to come back. You didn’t ever want to see Aegon Targaryen again. 

“No, it’s because- ” You hit your head on the back of the car, knocking the air out of your lungs. The carriage came to a halt, catapulting Lucerys forward into the other seat. Jacaerys bursted into uncontrollable laughter as he rubbed his forehead from the impact. 

It was a great start to a visit, a crash landing. Surely, not foreshadowing the rest of your adventure. As you unpiled from the carriage a welcome party stood there waiting for you. It was unexpected, seeing your grandsire there in decent health, you heard he was much worse. 

Then there were the Hightowers, looking as if they wanted to be anywhere but here. Your eyes scanned over them one by one, Alicent wore her plastered fake smile as usual, Otto stood too stiffly and only looked at Daemon, Aemond looked ready to murder you all. He was far different from what you remembered, tall, slender, and handsome even with one eye. 

Then there was Helaena… Completely disassociated from whatever was happening and mumbling under her breath. You smiled, the rage you felt before when you imagined her was gone. You had actually healed and successfully moved forward. This was good, so great you could even hug her… 

Until your eyes moved to her left. The sunken feeling in your chest blossomed into a new monster threatening to devour you. Your smile faded; your heart began erratically pumping blood to all parts of your body. Your knees locked in place trying to keep your balance. 

Aegon… Aegon was only ten feet away and yet there seemed to be miles between you. It was a joke, a great joke, he looked more gorgeous than he ever had. His hair was cut to frame his face perfectly, his jaw was more defined, his dark circles brought out the beautiful sea blue that surrounded his pupils. 

The smile that adorned his face was larger than any you had seen him wear prior. His eyes twinkled with childlike glee. The corset you wore became suffocatingly tight and the heat in King’s Landing began to make your head spin. Your breathing was rapid, a million emotions coursing their way through your head. 

Aegon took a step down the stairs, your body wanted to flee but you were frozen in time. Another step, all the air in your body left you. A third step made all the bile in your stomach rise to your throat. His feet touched the ground, and he strode towards you, the world started to spin, your mind racing with the worst possible outcomes. 

You blinked, for a mere second. You reminded yourself it had been five years; he had no hold on you anymore. He was a monster, a terrible man and a worse son. Aegon was not going to get under your skin, you were not going to falter in front of him. You were better now, you moved on, you were mentally healthy… 

You opened your eyes, inhaling a deep breath. He was one pace in front of you, “Niece.” 

Disappointment, Aegon was riddled with it every day and today was no expectation. He was so excited his soul wanted to jump out of its skin. But no, the second he approached you passed out and all the sudden he was the villain. What could he have possibly done a foot away to make you faint? 

Unless you were too excited to see him, your heartbeat too fast and you fainted. It would make the most sense, reuniting with the person you truly love would send anyone over the edge. It almost made him faint when he first laid eyes upon you. 

Gods you were so much more beautiful than he could have imagined. You had grown into a gorgeous woman, easily the prettiest one at court. Your eyes sparkled like diamonds, your hair flowed perfectly down your face, and your cheeks still flushed bright pink when you saw him.  

Your dress hugged your figure in all the right places and the things he imagined laid beneath made him insatiably horny. Control, he had to remind himself it’d been years and he needed that. It was hard considering the two days you’d been here he had only seen one glimpse. One quick glimpse in the courtyard before you were stolen away again. 

Your chambers were only a few hallways away and he could see you anytime he wanted. And yet, Aegon had to plot when to corner you. There was not only a hoard of guards following you around every step you took but Jacaerys clung to your skirts like a lost orphan. 

So, he waited and waited… and fucking waited until he was practically ripping the hair from his skull. The lack of your presence was okay on the first day, the second it was tolerable but by the third day it became suspicious. Impatient and spoiled, his mother’s words rang true more and more each day. 

It was increasingly clear that it wasn’t just them keeping you from him, but you were putting extra care into avoiding him. What did he do wrong? The stalking? The letters? The gifts that were never opened. It was all obvious professions of love… Why would you be uncomfortable with that?

Aegon was nursing another goblet of wine as he sunk to the floor. His face felt wet as if he were crying… Was he crying? His body to the point of numbness he could not tell any longer. Sadly, it seemed the wine was not working to cure the ever-disheartening thoughts in his mind. 

You were going to get married and forget all about him. They hadn’t given him a single opportunity to attempt to carve his way back into your heart and most likely weren’t going to. What was the reason for living at this point? The one thing he yearned to touch was so close yet so far. 

He scoffed at himself. Aegon was no tragic poet, but he was beginning to sound like one. It was the alcohol, a new type probably causing his episode. He went to grasp the corner of the table to stand up, but his legs could no longer withstand his weight. The contents on the table along with his own body fell to the floor. 

Not one of his proudest moments to date.  

“You’re pathetic,” an irritating voice laced with superiority drew him out of his head. “Brother, have you come to visit your- I mean my children? They aren’t here.” Aemond clenched his jaw once, twice until he let out a deep breath. There was no point in arguing with Aegon, there was no winning against someone fueled by pure delusions. 

He would never come to see his- Aegon’s children in his room. They would be with their sweet mother far away from the monstrosity they called dad. “We’re all being forced to attend her wedding tourney.” 

“When?” Aegon’s eyes lit up and the sunken expression finally lifted. “At dawn,” Aemond took a step back before the smell of wine, sweat and uncleanliness of three days seeped into his nose. “For the love of the seven take a bath!” 

Hope, there was still hope left in the world! All of the sudden he had awakened, the whimpering pathetic mess he was a few moments ago was long forgotten. The gears in his brain began turning… 

As Aemond strode out of Aegon’s chambers a new plan formed into the mind of the monster himself… “Little brother,” he sang with a cruelty only Aegon could possess. “Will our dear uncle Gwayne be participating?” 

-

Aemond did not loathe his brother as much as everyone believed he did. Yes, he was jealous Aegon the wastrel was first born, and he was not. Yes, he was jealous Helaena was forced to marry the pig instead of him. No, he did not blame his brother for any of this. Solidarity was exceedingly important in times like these, future succession wars and all. 

What he learned was, Aegon hated being married to Helaena as much as she did. Aegon didn’t want to be king and would gladly give it to Aemond if the time came. Lastly, as sad as Aegon could be he was fiercely loyal to his family. If it came down to it Aemond knew his brother would die for them… or take an eye instead. 

“Has he stopped wallowing in his sorrow?” Even when she insulted people Helaena’s voice sounded like angels in his ear. “No, though he has come up with another borderline war crime plan.” She let out a deep sigh as she fiddled with the needle she used to sew. “Should I ask?” 

“He’s urging Gwayne to kill the Fiance before they have a chance to wed.” Helaena stifled a laugh; she should be offended he would dishonor her or even vengeful since her husband dare tried to intervene on another woman’s affairs. Instead, she bit her lip from smiling, “I should be glad she is not as deranged as him or I may not be here today.” 

Aemond rose from his seat and sat down next to her. His long fingers gently caressed the side of her face, pushing back the strands that obscured his view of her violet eyes. “I would kill her before she could ever lift a finger.” 

Helaena gently tugged Aemond’s hands away from her face, cupping them in her lap. “Aems you are far too serious. She’s still as sweet as a rose I hear…” 

There was a sudden silence between them, not uncomfortable in the slightest but eerily still, nonetheless. If Helaena was being honest with herself, she felt terribly for you. She couldn’t imagine what pain he had caused or what exactly he had done to cause you to faint at the mere sight of him. 

She could imagine, Helaena simply wished not to burden herself with those thoughts. You were her savior in a weird sense of the word. Because of your existence her brother did not attempt to bed her or force heirs upon her, he did not touch her, he did not bother her unless requested of him. You kept his mind preoccupied, so she wasn’t completely trapped in a horrid marriage such as her mothers. Aegon was a good brother and only a brother… Sometimes she worried what would happen if you ceased to exist. 

Still, she was trapped in a marriage. Aemond and Helaena had two vastly different reasons for wanting you around. Helaena wanted to see Aegon content, happy even if they were lucky. And if things happened the way it did in her dreams… Their marriage would be annulled and you two could wed and she could continue to do as she pleased with the father of her children. A fairytale but she was known for being the dreamer. 

Aemond simply wanted his brother to get off his fucking ass and do something with his life. He wanted him to stop whoring, to stop pushing away duties, and to start taking matters seriously. The only way he was going to do that was if his favorite toy was promptly returned to him. You also kept Aegon far away from his beloved Helaena, that was merely a bonus. 

If he had to choose, obviously he would have not chosen his brother to become obsessed with one of the bastards, it couldn’t be helped anymore. The seeds of whatever drug Aegon made you take to enjoy him had already been planted. The spell you used to seduce him had already begun working. 

At the very least you defended them… somewhat. It was enough to make him wish you were dead even less. He had to remind himself, though you were a bastard and related to his sworn enemy, you were also just a woman. As his mother once said, ‘all women are created in the image of the mother and to be spoken of with reverence… And to be treated as such!’ 

Aemond let out a breath he didn’t realize he was holding. “We’re going to find a convoluted way to help him, aren’t we?” Helaena hummed to herself for a moment, was there any way they could really help you? “Do you believe she is distant because she believes he abandoned her?” 

They gazed at each other for a moment, a silent agreement. You were easy to read, at least to the dreamer herself… “Yes Aems, I think we are.”

The dress you were forced into was unbearably tight, the summer sun had seeped through the red fabric and your blood felt as if it was boiling. The royal stand was too crowded, too many unwelcome faces and bodies suffocating you. The noise of horses and knights preparing to show off for your favor made your ears ache. Unbearable, that was the best way you could describe your current predicament. 

The fainting spell was enough to have your mother confine you to chambers. She knew, your brothers knew, the Hightowers knew, everyone in the entire keep could see through you both. At every single turn you were specifically swayed far away from your uncle. Absolutely no contact, especially since you were to be married. 

That’s what the entire day was for, to celebrate you being sold off to a son of Dorne. If the heat in King’s Landing doesn’t kill you first, then surely the sun there will do the job. You hoped your death would come sooner rather than late. 

If the day could not go any worse the sound of someone taking a seat next to you caused you to flinch. You could smell him, practically taste the wine emitting off of him. Then there was the seat to your left, the scent of flowers filled your nose. Your eyes stayed glued to your hands. You didn’t dare move or breathe… 

A gentle hand that was as soft as a feather pillow touched yours. “Don’t be nervous.” Helaena, of all the people in the world you did not expect her to say such. Especially now, since you were separating husband and wife or did, they purposely do this to torment you further? “If I’m sitting in your place I can move, princess.” 

You kept your head turned to her, trying your hardest to ignore the one sitting far too close to your right. Where was your mother? Your brothers? Where was your family to rescue you? “Nonsense! I purposely asked Jacaerys to let me sit next to you.” To the right, you could feel two violet eyes burning holes into the back of your skull. 

“How lovely,” you muttered out trying to find your family from the corner of your eyes. How in the seven hells was he next to you? You turned your body towards the crowd, an invisible shield in your mind blocking you from turning the other way. 

Behind you, your entire family was in the row above staring daggers into Aegon. Of course, he stole Lucerys seat before he had a chance to protest. The sound of trumpets blaring, and the weakened voice of your grandsire distracted you, momentarily from the hell you were living in. 

A warm and soft hand was placed over your own. Dragging your nails from tarnishing the skin around them. “Afraid your husband to be is going to lose?” It felt as though a bolt of lightning shot down your back. You bit your lip, no you wanted him to lose and potentially be stabbed in a duel. You actually want to be stabbed too right now.

Milk of the poppy was your savior. That’s what had been prescribed to keep you grounded. It’s why you’re not currently on the floor unconscious. It's why you decided to engage in conversation instead of keeping your mouth shut. It's why you let his hands caress your own and bask in the warmth they provided. It wasn’t you; it was the medication. 

“Why aren’t you participating in the tourney?” You could feel a smile curve onto his face, though you swore not to look. “Why would I? Do you want me to compete for your favor?” You turned to look at him, shocked by the accusation you would want him of all people competing for you. That was a fantasy of children, a dead one at that. 

A mistake was made when you glanced at him. Gods, he was beautiful in the most pathetic way possible. The dark circles, the smug smile, the unruly hair, the piercing eyes and the jaw with just a tad of baby fat encompassing it. You forgot his lady wife sitting next to you, you forgot your family watching you. For a moment, it was just you looking at the pretty monster who ruined you. A shimmer of hope, a memory of childhood championship bubbled to the surface. 

“No Aegon, I think you would lose,” you jested. His eyes sparkled; his subtle grin turned into a wide blinding smile. “I think I already have your favor.” Your mouth parted to speak, cheeks brimming red from the implication.

Down below the sounds of cracking shields and screams of pain stifled by armor were becoming the loudest noise. A Blackwood had just begun a duel with a Bracken and… his entrails were staining the tan colored sand a dark shade of crimson. You felt bile rising up in your throat as you unconsciously tightened your drip on Aegon’s hand. An act that didn’t go unnoticed and was quickly returned. 

“Not a fan of bloodshed?” His voice sounded softer, almost kind versus his usual unserious tone. He was staring at the side of your face and his eyes shone with mild concern combined with amusement. Aegon was always one for violence, not you.  By no means were you against it, seeing the insides of someone’s stomach simply didn’t suit your fancy. 

“And the day grows ugly…” Helaena let out a deep sigh as she gazed at the scene below. Her voice made you quickly realize how disrespectful you were being towards their marriage. In a second, your hand was ripped out of his grasp and placed firmly on your lap. Avoid, you avoided both of their looks and your gaze moved strictly forward. 

You could have sworn you saw a flash of Aemond’s eyepatch and his fingers patting at her knee. Oddly enough, you were very suspicious of brother and sister relationships considering the family you were born into. Thank heavens you were amongst the normal ones… almost. 

“You’re not wrong, Hel. You’re not wrong.” Aegon’s voice had lost all its original sympathetic tone as his lips formed into a pout like a spoiled brat. “Princess! Your favor would surely help me win this tournament if you could be so kind.” 

The sound of your fiancés voice made you want to sink into the abyss of your mind and let it swallow you. Maybe even feed yourself to Vhagar much like your late aunt Laena did. Aegon looked worse, enraged and annoyed to the utmost level. 

His body moved slowly towards your fiancée, and you swore if looks could kill he would be dead. You didn’t flinch or falter this time. You no longer frowned at the sight of the man you were supposed to marry. In fact, you were bubbling with joy.

The second Martell son held a huge smile while he waited for you to place your favor on his lance. You did your best to make a spectacle out of it, wishing him luck as loudly as you could. Your mother was smiling proudly, surely congratulating herself on a fine match she had made. 

She didn’t understand, you weren’t happy because of him. You were happy to see Aegon leaking envy from his pores with the most miserable look on his face. Now he was feeling exactly what you did and it felt fucking fantastic. You gracefully sat back in place with a smile that went ear to ear. 

“Would you like to place a bet on who will win, uncle?” He shifted in place, his eyes following the black mare your fiancée rode. “I don’t intend on betting coins, niece.” An awfully smug look creeped onto his face. “What are we betting?” 

Aegon leaned into you, so his mouth nearly brushed over your ear. His breath was heavy and laced with confidence. His whispers sent a shiver up your spine that glued you in place. “If Gwayne Hightowers knocks your beloved husband off his horse I get to claim you in front of everyone.” 

“…”

Your breath hitched in your throat as the world paused. Heat rose from the tips of your toes to the very top of your head, radiating in all directions. The drugs were no longer keeping your very unstable emotions at bay. Your cheeks were not just flushed by the idea but from the crushing reminder he was not yours to claim. He was stolen from you and didn’t mind until you showed back up. No letters, no secret rendezvous, no gifts on name days or holidays… To Aegon it was always just a game. 

A game he was still fucking playing at your own expense. Could he not see he had done enough? He had ruined what sliver of self-respect you had years ago? What else was there for him to take besides your life. Your original despair turned into something hateful, “My husband will win and when he does you have to stay away from me for as long as I’m here.” 

His mouth hung agape as he was trying to debate this completely unfair bet. Aegon was going to make a jest, defend himself or anything really before the trumpets blared loud enough for the deaf to hear. “Hmph,” you turned in your seat, stone faced, chin held high, completely ignoring his presence to watch the knights begin to mount their horses.

Ser Gwayne Hightower was wearing a suit of armor and a green cape. Gwayne’s helm was in the shape of a lantern… It looked completely ridiculous. His horse wasn’t stupid, it was a powerful white charger, and his lance appeared to be held firmly in his grip. From all the stories you’ve heard, he was an amazing knight. He’d won many tourneys in the past and nearly knocked down Daemon once. 

Your fiancée was on the other side, and he certainly did stand out… The golden decor on his armor was perhaps a bit much and he refused to wear a helm. His horse was beautiful albeit not as powerful as the charger. It wasn’t looking very good.

You were too busy praying to the seven for mercy when the two horses took off. In a flash their lances connected, and poor Quentyn was nearly thrown off. You heard a snicker from the corner, and you whipped your head to stare at the smirk plastered all over Aegon’s face. “Heh look at that!” No fucking way, no way in the names of any god would he get to do anything with you. “Fuck you, uncle,” the venom laced words seeped out of your mouth before you could contain them. Your perfect facade was beginning to break so quickly. 

“That can be arranged.” You gritted your teeth and your nostrils flared. Seeing him win in anyway made you want to snatch a sword and shove it right between his fucking… 

“We have a winner!” 

The crowd erupted into deafening cheers, and you forgot whatever your last thought was. You stood up from your seat to gaze at the ground and surely enough… 

“Quentyn Martell has won the favor of the Princess!” 

Heh heh heh…. You turned to look at him with a smirk only the divine could wear, “I win.” 

He miss stepped, Aegon had completely misread the situation at hand. Her mind had been completely poisoned by those… those cunts! And Gwayne completely fumbled the fucking tourney. This added more layers to the issues already at hand. Firstly, her husband needed to go and fast. Secondly, he had to untaint her mind. Thirdly, how the hell was he going to keep her here with him? Aegon only had a single day and night to do it… 

CRASH

Another empty goblet of wine was thrown into the wall. The small shards covered the floor like winter snow tainted by red droplets of wine. The prince was raging and drinking… ceaselessly. “For the love of the seven will you sit down!” Aemond watched unamused, on the edge of storming out himself at this display. It was getting annoying how easily irritated his brother was becoming. Aegon stomped across, “We have to kill him… Preferably sooner rather than late.” 

“We could tell the truth about her virtue and have a Septon annul the marriage… avoid making any unnecessary enemies.” Aegon pivoted to stare at Aemond, face void of any signs of agreement. “Yes, and besmirch her reputation in the process… Ha! That will surely make her crawl into my bed.” 

Aemond really fucking hated sarcasm above all forms of conversation. “Oh, great manipulative tactician, what exactly were you thinking?” His steps paused as he toyed with the knife he kept on belt. He wasn’t a genius nor was he overly capable of manipulation like his grandfather…

“It can only work if she is obsessed with me again.” The younger brother let out a groan, rubbing his face with both his hands. “What exactly are you planning to do?” 

A wicked smirk curled its way onto his lips. His pupils momentarily turned dark, “Not I, dear brother, what are you going to do.” Aemond lowered his hands, so his eye picked through, raising an eyebrow. 

—

“This won’t do,” Rhaenyra declared as she tossed another necklace laced with jewels onto the floor of your chambers. “Mother!” you gaped as the expensive piece fell to the floor. She pursed her lips together, fingers grazing the delicate jewelry laid before you. “My first born, my only daughter is getting married… Tacky crystals won’t do.” You sunk deeper into your chair, twirling your wet hair in between your fingers. 

Rhaenyra closely examined a few more pieces, none of which suited her exquisite taste. She turned to you, her eyebrows creasing together. “You look more pale than usual.” You looked up at her and her eyes were laced with concern. One thing about your mother is that you could never lie to her. She knew you more than you knew yourself. The slightest bit of discomfort she could snuff out and exile it from your mind. 

“I haven’t been sleeping well as of late.” Her gentle hands went to comb through your hair. “If you changed your mind and don’t wish to get married, I could always have Daemon, take care of it.” You choked up a laugh, “threatening murder on my wedding day? How very festive.” 

A small smile made her lips curve upwards. She let out a breath, plucking a necklace off the counter and holding it to your neck. “Is it him?” The dragon necklace made of diamonds laced with gold details seemed to taunt you. “No, he hasn’t bothered me at all.” A bold-faced lie that your mother could see through instantaneously. Rhaenyra wrapped the necklace around your throat and clasped it in the back. “Really? He seemed to bother you at the tourney.” 

The necklace seemed to be choking you though it wasn’t tight at all. It would have been something you wore if you were getting married to him instead. A golden dragon paying homage to Sunfyre… “Just playful banter. Honestly it went far better than expected.” 

She looked as if she was about to contest what you said but three knocks at the door caught both your attention. It slowly creaked open revealing a maid no older than fifteen. She stood meekly in the entrance shifting eyes between your mother and yourself. 

“I didn’t mean to disturb you; the king requested your presence.” Your mother raised her brow, questioning the situation at hand. You gave a nearly unnoticeable nod, reassuring her everything was all right. She clapped her hands together, “You’re not disturbing anyone! My love I’ll return shortly.”

Rhaenyra strided out the door with the confidence only a queen could possess. You envied the way she carried herself no matter the situation. You slumped back down into your chair staring at yourself in the grandiose mirror. Maybe it wouldn’t be so bad having Daemon rid you of your husband… If anything, he would probably take pride in having something to hold over your head.

But a war was brewing, it was an inevitable fact that no one could deny and soon it would be impossible to ignore. You needed the dornish alliance, and you were the perfect bargaining chip… Curse the seven for making you a woman. 

“You look like you’re in agony. Already getting the wedding blues?” It’s no use asking how he snuck in, it’s no use asking why he was here, and it’s absolutely no fucking use to start panicking. “Uncle, I thought we had an agreement.” His steps were light, almost frolicking to stand behind your seat in front of the vanity. Aegon’s face was the ideal image of serenity, you couldn’t say the same for yourself. 

“It’s your wedding day! Surely, I can offer my congratulations on this joyous day.” There wasn’t an honest way you could describe the pain within your chest. It felt as if a blade had carved a hole within your heart that refused to heal. A dark abyss threatening to swallow you whole. He wasn’t meant to be happy; you were supposed to be cheery. Aegon was meant to pin after you until he died… Not move on and get married, have children, and celebrate your own wedding. 

You didn’t feel the tears quietly falling from your eyes or the way your lip was quivering. His hand moved to graze your shoulder, but you jumped out of your seat, snapping your head back to face him. “Don’t touch me!” He put his hands up in mock surrender, “W-woah…”

“Did you come here to torment me some more? Do you revel watching me be so miserable?” He stumbled back, muttering some incoherent apology that fell on deaf ears. “You abandoned me! You left me like a dog and went to go playhouse with your perfect fucking family, perfect fucking wife and two perfect children.” 

One of the many things you were shouting must have triggered something within him. Aegon grabbed your shoulders with such force you almost buckled under their grip. He shook you like a child would shake their pet if it stopped listening. “Perfect? Have you become fucking delusional? What part of a forced marriage to your sister sounds perfect to you?!” 

“Let me go! Don’t- fucking touch me!” You shouted in between sobs. “No! You’re telling me you’ve been ignoring me for years because you’re fucking jealous?” You swatted at his face, attempting to grab him by his hair to pull him down. Poor idea, Aegon always thought violence was exciting. Somewhere amidst the fight you ended up wrestling on the ground shouting curses at one another. 

“I hate you! I would never be jealous of you!” Aegon shiftly straddled you and began fighting to grab your wrists again. To make it all the more unbearable the bastard was smiling. “Bullshit! It’s seeping off of you.” You bit down on his hand that came just a little too close to your mouth. He growled, slamming on wrists behind your head. “Seven hells will you calm down and listen!” 

You writhed underneath him, albeit with less screams of curses. This rather pathetic display went on for only another minute before he forced his lips onto yours. It was rough, mainly teeth clashing together and lips fighting against one another. Part of you wished it could continue, to relive your past one more time before you were sold off. 

The other part of you bit his lip hard enough to draw blood. Aegon relented, a droplet of blood staining his swollen bottom lip. Whatever spell he had put on you had worked; you were quiet and unusually still. “Look at me.” You turned your head to face the wall, refusing to be trapped by those damned eyes. “Look at me!” Begrudgingly, after being shouted at, you looked at him. “My marriage is not happy. I swear on my own life I only bedded her once. I was so drunk I can’t even remember if it truly happened…” 

“More lies… You have two children.” He scoffed, looking around the room as if asking the seven for patience. “Oh, for the love of- Do you really think those are mine? Just look at them!” Aegon appeared unbelievably desperate for you to believe him. His eyes frantically searching yours for any comfort… 

The twins did appear more similar to one brother than the other… Jaehaera herself was a spitting image of Helaena only. “I don’t believe you…” His face dropped as if you had taken an arrow to his heart. “But it wouldn’t matter if I did. I’m getting married tonight.” A foolish course of action on your part because you gave him hope. A dangerous thing if given to the wrong people and he was by far the wrong person. 

He pressed his mouth against you once more, this time his soft lips caressed your own gently. The taste of wine and iron coated your tastebuds, and it wasn’t at all displeasing. It was comforting, like a hug from an old friend. He pulled his right hand away from your wrist, almost giving you time to escape. But the second your arm moved he grabbed it with his left. A gentle, almost comfortable, kiss was turning into a desperate one. 

Aegon’s tongue slid into your mouth doing circles with your own. Your breaths quickened as he began to nibble on your bottom lip, pulling it between his teeth and then kissing it before letting go again. His hands slid down to your thighs, cupping them firmly in his warm palms and massaging their shape. You shivered when his fingers brushed against your most sensitive area, it had been so long since anyone had touched you. 

The wedding you were supposed to be attending today became a distant memory as he kissed you senseless. His lips trailed across your jawline and down your neck, leaving a trail of fire in its wake. When his nose grazed yours again you found yourself trembling with need. 

“You have missed me,” he whispered breathlessly. You wanted to say no, that your body was betraying you but when his fingers grazed your unclothed cunt all you could mutter was “ah, ah, ah~”

His tongue flicked out and traced up the side of your neck, then back down. He slipped his tongue inside of your ear, and then swallowed down all of your words. His fingers began gently teasing at your clit, sliding between your wet folds, rubbing it painstakingly slow. You whimpered into his mouth, begging him to do more.

Aegon wasn’t supposed to give it all to you so easily but… Forcing in a few fingers was far from all he could do. He began thrusting his fingers in and out of your slick folds, making sure to tease your clit each time. His eye had a wicked gleam to them watching you come undone underneath him, “you think you’ll be happy with another man? You think he’ll be able to please you like I do?” 

You opened your mouth but all that came out was a muffled cry. “No one knows your body like I do. No one can ever please you like I do.” His fingers moved swifter curling up to hit the sweet spot inside of you. Your legs buckled around him as you began to moan ceaselessly. A wicked smile took over his features, “be honest with yourself everytime you try to fuck another man you’ll be imagining me, my lips, my tongue, my fingers and my cock inside of you.” 

Your arms fell limply by your sides, the world spinning in circles as a delicious haze descended upon you. Your hips moved of their own accord, grinding against his fingers as he continued to push them deeper inside of you. “I’ve already ruined you, what other man could want you?  Who do you belong to? Say it!” 

“Y-You! Aegon! I belong to you.” You cried out in pleasure, your voice echoing through the room. He pressed his lips against you once more, swallowing all the noises you made as your cunt tightened around his thick fingers. “That’s a good little girl,” He purred as your orgasm washed over you.

“Aegon…” You breathed, your head lolling to the side as he pulled his fingers out of your quivering pussy. He sat up, face returning to its usual expression of complete nonchalant. “I’ll give you time to get all dressed up, recite vows you do not mean with a stranger, dance until your heart's content and then I’m taking back what’s rightfully mine.” 

He leaped off of you swiftly, lazily fixing his hair and wiping the blood from his mouth. You propped yourself up on your elbows, “What in the seven hells?” Aegon smiled at you, but it wasn’t one of genuine joy. It was sick with cruel eyes behind it. “You’ll see.” 

The seeds of doubt had been planted into your mind and had already begun to sprout. The once joyous occasion was quickly turning into a fucking nightmare. To be Frank, you really wish you were dead instead of standing up here reciting vows you did not mean. It was awkward, unbelievably awkward. For five years your beloved had been pining for you and you were too blind to see it. 

Or it was all a sick joke being played on you. Which one was worse you did not know. Your entire family stood there, smiling, your mother nearly on the verge of tears seeing her only daughter preparing to start a family of her own… Gods, is this how Aegon felt all these years knowing he was the disappointment? You had been completely soiled and yet here you stand with your new husband… Aegon’s scent and markings weren’t even fully off of you! 

The entire ceremony was eerily calm. No random bursts of violence or protests to your union.  Which means your uncle may or may not intend to murder and or maim this man tonight. Any sound of mind woman would be sick at the thought and run for aid… Obviously you were not at all that type of girl. Currently you were jumping out of your skin waiting for him to finally arrive and rescue you. 

The only issue was, he never did show up. Not for the first kiss, not for the first dance, not for the speech his father was barely able to make or the feast itself… Did he intend to ignore you until it was all over? 

____________________________________

Aegon was unbelievably late to the wedding celebration. It was on purpose; he had a few loose strings he needed to tie before he arrived. For once he was sober and painstakingly polite as he walked in. It is fair to mention he had the servants meticulously fix his normal disheveled appearance so he could make an impression on you. 

When Aegon first entered the great hall, his eyes were immediately drawn to the center of the room, where a grand table adorned in the finest gold sits on a raised dais. The royal table is flanked on either side by rich red tapestries, ornately embroidered with the sigils of the houses respectively. If only he could burn all of the dornish banners with Sunfyre.

As he moved throughout the room, Aegon was struck by the attention to detail. Everywhere you looked, you saw the sign of the union between two powerful houses, a testament to the joyous occasion for which this room has been decked out. It was fucking disgusting and Aegon wanted to puke on it.

The throne room was filled to the brim with Lords and Ladies alike from all across the realm. In the center, just in front of the throne sat the royal table. On the opposing sides of the room were the packed tables for the highly esteemed guests. The middle of the room was cleared for dancing and eventually the marriage itself…

He wished he could throw himself into the spikes of the throne. Instead, he had to slither his way through the crowds to make way to the table. Aegon was tired of waiting, He was tired of hearing your family gawk at the well-made match and he was especially tired of doing nothing. Your husband would be dealt with in due time, but he hadn’t the patience to pretend not to be itching to speak to you, to touch you, anything but sit here and fucking watch. 

He finally pulled himself up onto the podium and marched his way in front of you. You seemed stunned, miserable, in awe of his beauty. All of which were better than you being happy to be wed. "I'm insulted you have yet to ask me to dance, uncle." His lips twisted into his usual overly confident smile. “didn’t want to disturb the happy couple so soon.” 

Your eyes rolled into the back of your skull as you stuck out your hand waiting for him to take it. There were stares from certain people of course, those who knew what happened at Driftmark and potentially before. You didn’t really care anymore. 

For a moment, he was the perfect gentleman. Placing his hands in only the proper places and spinning you around the floor with ease. If you were a normal family, this would be a sweet interaction between relatives… But you were twisted and Targaryens. “You know, I’m putting more effort into this dance than my own wedding.” You scoffed, “Oh joy, surely no one will find this suspicious at all.” 

Aegon’s face mirrored disgust as he glanced around you. “Is something the matter?” He rolled his eyes, "Your dearly beloved is gawking." You stood on your tiptoes to glance over his shoulder. Surely enough, the pretty dornish prince was smiling ear to ear watching you…"Do something about it." 

The mischievous look Aegon always wore as a child made its reappearance. It was quick, his hands grasping onto your face and pulling you so close you could feel his breath on your skin. “You would let me dishonor you in front of all these people, bad princess.” You whined trying to lean up into his face, but he pulled back, “tsk tsk, can’t let your husband see you so needy for my affection now, can we?” 

You wished he would stop referring to him as your husband. You wished he would stop reminding you of what waited for you after the night ended. “Sister… Prince Aegon.” Jacaerys appeared from behind like a thief in the night. Immediately souring any positive mood Aegon could have been in. He stepped back, letting his hands fall to his sides. “Nephew.” He gritted through his teeth with a subtle bow. 

“Princess, would you dance with me?” You glanced between the two and felt the humiliation of the situation beginning to seep in. Your mother was on the high podium with a faux smile and a death grip on her fork observing you… “Of course! Let’s go little brother.”

The dance was alright… But you couldn’t get your mind off of the Lannister girl who was practically drooling at the sight of Aegon. He had slept with her before you knew this much. A secret part of you kept track of the whores he buried his cock inside, at least the rich ones. What happened next was honestly a blur, you couldn’t remember a thing. Except that you may or may not have called her a whore and threatened her life if she dared to touch him… She scurried away with her hands on her and tears in her eyes. 

You weren’t jealous at all, only defending Helaena’s honor. 

____________________________________

“Prince Aegon, pleasure to finally meet you,” If the night couldn't get any better the man of the hour had just willingly approached the man plotting against him… “Prince Quentyn, nice of you to believe this is a pleasure.”  He smirked, “Your wife looks very beautiful.” Aegon patted his shoulders, “as does yours.” 

Quentyn winced, a rather noticeable scowl growing on his face. “She’ll never be yours, my prince.”

“You’ll see later tonight whose name she calls out while your cock is inside her.” He smiled a crooked grin. Quentyn’s fists balled up next to his sides, Aegon wasn’t one to directly fight, he was more behind the scenes type of criminal. There was no denying that he was strong, strong enough to crack this man’s skull. But that wasn’t part of the plan… His feet moved fast, swiftly connecting his fist to Aegon’s jaw. 

The crowd erupted behind them, lords and ladies screaming trying to escape the violence. Suddenly, Aegon stopped trying to attack and let the dornish cunt take charge. He tackled him to the ground and landed hit after hit… Was this really worth it, he thought to himself as blood started to trickle down his face. “You- fucking- wastrel-” Aegon was laughing hysterically whilst getting his face beat in… All according to plan, he told himself. 

“Get off of him!” You screeched in horror pulling at the man assaulting your lover. It wasn’t meant to take a turn like it did. Quentyn, not recognizing you, turned and landed a hit square to your cheek knocking you on your ass. “Protect the princess!” Some guard shouted from behind whilst dogpiling onto your husband. He stared in horror at what he had done, you were gripping your cheek mortified, and Aegon was laying there covered in blood laughing his ass off like a psychopath. 

The maester was applying ice to your cheekbone as you nervously picked at the seams on your dress. “We’ll have the marriage annulled by tomorrow.” Rhaenyra paced inside the room. “On what grounds? Aegon was obviously egging him on,” Jacaerys groaned from the corner. “I could kill him and fix this entirely,” Daemon muttered watching his wife rage on. 

The rest of the argument was drowned out, the only noise you could hear was the sound of Aegon’s jaw cracking. You didn’t feel despair that the wedding was ruined, you didn’t feel depressed that your husband had hit you… No, you felt completely fucking enraged. 

Seeing Aegon harmed had awoken something in you. It was hateful and could not be quelled by a simple apology. He fucking beat him to a pulp in the midst of your wedding then had the audacity to lay a hand on you… It may or may not have awoken something because seeing Aegon laughing whilst covered in his own blood made your core heat up. 

“Could I be given some milk of the poppy for the pain, mother?” Rhaenyra looked at you with the most sorrowful expression she could muster, “oh my sweet girl.” She cupped your cheeks in her hands and rubbed at the bruise that was forming. “Go fetch some tea for my daughter, Maester… Now!” 

____________________________________

You were returning to your chambers in a rather dumbed down state. The medicine made your mind hazy, and your body feel light as a feather. It was like wine but far better with less of a hangover. The corridors were dark, all the excitement from tonight was far over. You hummed to yourself lazily, dreading the return to where your husband lay. Until you felt a hand wrap around your mouth and yank you into a hole in the wall you never knew was there. 

You tried to scream but were quickly shushed by a voice that could only belong to one man. “Aegon? What are you doing?” He smiled at you, rubbing the bruise on your cheek. “Will you go out for a walk with me?” You raised your eyebrow in distrust, “To where?” Aegon grinned, almost too enthusiastically to trust, “the dragonpit.” 

The most unexpected event of tonight wasn’t the wedding brawl nor the injury that befall you. It was the fact you were riding on Sunfyre again, with Aegon holding onto your waist as you soared through the stars. It was a wedding gift, he claimed. As far as you knew Aegon never let anyone touch his dragon let alone ride with him, except you. 

It was indescribable, the feeling of the wind rushing past your cheeks. The view of the city and the moon shining above you reflecting off his scales. You were giggling uncontrollably the entire flight listening to Aegon tell jests you hadn’t heard in years. Whatever injury he had gained was long forgotten the second you took off. Whatever drama or chaos in the keep didn’t exist outside. In the sky, you both were completely free. 

You couldn’t say how long you spent outside. Mayhaps it was an hour or two before Sunfyre descended onto a nearby beach surrounded by the most beautiful rock formations you had seen. “Is this your version of bridenapping me?” You teased while he helped you climb down the saddle. “It’s only kidnapping if you fight back.” 

He grasped your hand leading you across the sandy beach, showcasing the stars he supposedly, desperately wanted to show you. “I have an actual gift for you too.” You raised your eyebrows in disbelief, “Is it a ride home on Sunfyre?” Aegon laughed, genuinely laughed for the first time since you’ve returned. He dug in his pocket searching for something… “I had it made years ago but never had the chance to properly give it to you.”

In his hand was the most beautiful golden ring in the shape of a dragon. “A ring? A Sunfyre ring?” Aegon grabbed your hand and slipped it on with ease, “I’m not that creative, you know this. it was meant to be something to remember me by when you left.” Tears were prickling your eyes once more. The fool kept the damned ring all these years and never mentioned it. “Aegon… Be honest for once with me please. Do you still love me?” 

He paused, searching tirelessly for the right words to say. “I… There hasn’t been a day in five years where I haven’t thought about you at least once. There hasn’t been an hour that something has not reminded me of you. There hasn’t been a single night I’ve slept without seeing you… It isn’t normal, it’s twisted and sick and cruel just like I am. No matter what you do to others, to me, to yourself. No matter if the world ends in a freeze or we are in the midst of a war of the ages… I believe I’ll always feel this… And I don’t think I’ll be able to stop until the seven hells take me.” 

You sniffled; he always had such a roundabout way of saying things. “I’ll always love you too.” He smiled genuinely, pulling you into a kiss so gentle yet so firm it made you forget all the dangers of the world, the drama, the potential war, your husband, everything was irrelevant except for you two, right now under the stars.

“We still haven’t done the bedding ceremony.” You whispered against his lips. His eyes lit up, “Have you always been so needy for me?” You didn’t have time to protest before he was passionately colliding his lips against yours once more. You threw your arms around his neck and pulled him closer into you, making sure no part of you would ever be apart from him again.

His arms slipped below your waist as he lowered you onto the ground as gently as he could. Your legs fell open instinctively and his hands began to explore your body. It was vastly different from every other time you’ve been together. It was gentle and loving, passionate and pleasurable without the pain. 

Your bodies started to move in sync with each other, stripping away the clothes that hid your most intimate parts.  His hands held you close to his chest, keeping you warm while you were exposed to the elements. You moaned into his mouth, kissing him passionately with a hunger you had forgotten existed.

He broke the kiss, gasping for air. You opened your eyes to see the moonlight reflected off his face, sometimes Aegon Targaryen looked more God than man. He moved to suckle on your neck as he ran his length against your slit. 

“You’re so beautiful,” He murmured huskily against your ear. He slowly pushed inside, filling you with his thickness. You gasped from the sudden sensation. He was so deep within you, so far reaching you almost felt like you could reach out and touch the stars.

His kisses trailed down your neck, nibbling, sucking, biting. He took his time thrusting inside of you with slow movements, appreciating every moment your bodies were entertained. He stopped mid-thrust, holding himself deep within you.

“I love you, Princess.” He whispered, his voice so tender and soft. You blushed like a child; it was silly to think his cock being inside you didn’t make you feel as embarrassed as him telling you, his feelings. “Always.” You murmured back. He kissed you deeply, his tongue slipping past your teeth.

You clung tight to his neck, your nails digging into his skin. He moved faster, his breaths coming in shorter and quicker. You moaned, your thighs trembling from the feeling of fullness. His fingers traced circles on your inner thigh, and then he moved to your clit. 

He worked you effortlessly, eliciting soft whimpers and moans and love confessions. The world was a blur of fluorescent colors and smells, nothing mattered but you and Aegon. His climax came swiftly, almost right after your own. You begged for him to cum inside you, to fill you with his seed and he always did as you asked. 

He collapsed on top of you, his weight heavy on your shoulders. You wrapped your arms around his back, feeling him relax. “Aegon…” You spoke his name softly, your head resting on his shoulder. “Mhmm?” He said in a daze. “Again?” You whispered, your lips brushing against his neck. He smirked, his cock twitching inside of you.

____________________________________

[harrysmimi]

Whiskey

Synopsis: One where Harry falls for someone but he's married

Ps. This one also has an open ending I can write a part two if I get enough requests or responses on this. And idky I named this Whiskey honestly. Hehe.

Wordcount: 13k+

Part 2

More of my work | Read on Wattpad

CW: Mentions of alcohol, absent parents.

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Harry had everything!

He owned a multi million dollar company, several smaller businesses. He had lavish manshion, fancy cars and he wore nothing but Gucci.

In his case it seemed to be true; Money can't buy happiness.

He dreaded to go home every evening after work. Truly!

So everyday after he gets off of his meetings and daily check-ins. We made an habit of asking his driver to take him to this pub in the town.

The first time he was there, he found the vibes to be immaculate. Everyone minding their own business, a corner with huddled up by a table having little quizzes, old people hanging out just by themselves or in groups, the bar was mostly empty. Even if it was full, it wasn't suffocating like his fifteen-million dollar mantion was starting to feel to him. A perfect Saturday night.

"Hello, can I please get a whiskey?" He asked the barkeep. It was a girl. She looked up at him confused as if he said something alien to her, spared a glance tothe other bartender. But proceeded to get him his drink with trembling hands, with a coaster placed on the bar she placed his drink on top of it. That's when he noticed she poured a little too much in his glass. With a hesitant smile she got back to her work.

He saw that she had a wipe cloth in her hard, and there was just one other barkeep serving four other people. She wiped around the counter and picked up the empty glassware.

"You don't barkeep that often?" Harry asked, not minding the extra ounce of alcohol he got served. The girl looked at him through her glasses perched up on the bridge of her nose.

It was evident on her face she didn't like working there, but she shook her head in no. Most bartenders would love to have conversations.

"I just help cleaning around." She shrugged.

Harry swore he saw the softest smile on her face there as she threw the cleaning cloth on her shoulder, and went on to get pick up the glasses which were newly abandoned now.

Harry sat there sipping on his drink until she returned. Hearing her voice, he wanted to have a conversation with her, about what, he didn't know.

He downed his Whiskey in one go when he saw come back out, it burnt his throat but it was good kinda burn. He shook his head, letting lit a soft groan of a sigh. He wanted to feel that burn so bad!

"Can I have another, please?" He asked the girl, again.

She glanced over at the barkeep again, sighing she pull out away before she pulled out a clean one to pour another glass of whiskey from him. This time a little less.

"Follow the two finger rule." He told her. She glanced at him confused so, he gestured it to her setting two of his fingers horizontally against his empty glass. She tried to mimick him but Harry noticed how small her hands are in compare to his, but she was smart enough to pick up on it and take the ridges on the glass into consideration when she poured just enough this time and replaced his empty glass on the same coaster.

"Thank you for the help." She said, "I don't make the drink here, so I just didn't know. Please don't tell the owner about this."

"It's alright, love." Harry assured her, "I am Harry by the way."

"YN." She smiled.

Actually smiled at him!

A tiny smile. But it was something at least.

She had to get back to work as she could see her boss glaring daggers at her. But soon enough he asked for another glass lf Whiskey. And watch concern take over her pretty eyes.

"You recently started working here?" He asked, not to be creepy but he just didn't know how to start a conversation with her.

"No, I've been working here for four years." She shared, wiping down the counter in front of ber for the millionth time.

"Strange, and you don't know how to pour a Whiskey?"

"Like, I said, I don't make drinks here. We have Sam for that." She spared the Barkeep a glance who was now mixing an intricate drink which was entertaining enough for the drunk customers. "I don't want to bother him because he's been having a bad day today."

Harry could understand. The man putting up a smile on his face for sure. A completely different scenario than his own but he could relate.

"I see." He sounded.

"Mhmm." She nodded.

Harry handed her his card as he was done for the night. Not wanting to get drunk his ass off and have to deal with a headache and a lecture the next day from his wife. YN returned with his card and his bill. He placed his card back in his wallet just as he was about to slip it back in his pocket, he opened it back up and grabbed all the cash he had, six bills of hundred pounds, he placed it on the bill before he grabbed his phone and ready to leave.

"Harry!" He heard a call of his name, "I, uhh, I think you left this." He turned to look at the girl.

"No, that's for you. A tip." He explained, running a finger under his nose subconsciously.

"This is a lot. I am afraid I can't take it." Her voice was very low and he was stood just an arm's distance from her.

"That's okay, I won't tell anyone." A cheeky smirk took over his features, "have a nice rest of the night, YN. And keep it, please." He shot a little wave before he made his way out feeling the alcohol kicking in. That'll help him sleep.

......................................................................

On the Tuesday night, he figured that the girl he saw on the weekend at the pub only worked on weekends. It was a bummer. But that didn't stopped him from ordering his usual.

"Harry, what the fuck is going on with you?" He heard his wife the first thing when he stepped a foot inside.

"Aella, not now." He sighed making his way upstairs.

"No, you've been coming home late. Now apparently you've been drinking. What the fuck is going on? You don't even want to help me around anymore." Aella hissed at him.

That wasn't true. He does help her around still. She never does one thing for him except cook, he doesn't expect her to do anything either. He does his own laundry, makes his own breakfast because she likes to sleep in, he cleans up after him like a grown human he is, he never once asked her to do anything for him.

Why was he so frustrated you may ask?

It's been more than a year now feeling distanced from his partner of ten years. Aella have been nothing but emotionally abusive to him. Ever since his business had taken off from past year and half, it also meant his work load being doubled up.

He's got about twenty thousand people working for his company doesn't mean it takes away all the responsibilities he's got towards his firm. He takes his work seriously. Though he doesn't mind helping around with chores, he lives there of course he does his part and even more at times. Just this morning he had her yelling right in his ear how she haven't been able to go shopping because he has been spending more time at the office to help her do the house chores, so she can have nice time and go out shopping with her friends.

The love they had when they were eighteen, in college, back when he had nothing but debt to his name. Now she sees him as a some credit card and a house maid, she runs away from spending time with him. Hell, he can't even remember the last time they had a meal together and talked about anything but his works or her shopping around. He can't even remember the last they made love. She doesn't talk to him unless she wants to borrow the credit card or when she needs him do certain chore in the house. It was these stupid little things which could be solved easily if she had the patience to talk it through.

He just keeps it to himself now, and does whatever he has to do so she isn't bickering around him. She doesn't want to hire people to help around when they can clearly afford. He wants peace when he's back home.

Right now making his way straight to the guest bedroom seemed rhe best option to him which have become his new bedroom. "We'll talk tomorrow." He mumbled.

......................................................................

It was Saturday and he didn't even noticed. Luckily he was able to get off work early as his assistant did most of his work voluntarily because he wanted a raise. Harry asked him to talk to the manager about it today.

He was going to go see his sister at the mall. She was there to pick up her shoes for her wedding and get her gown fitted for first time. Being her Man of Honour, it was something he was really taking interest into. His older sister was getting married to the love of her life!

That's probably the only thing in his life keeping him sane right now. Watching his sister so happily get married.

Just as he was passing the Nike store, he swore he saw the girl from the Pub from last weekend with a little ten year old boy. She was bullying him one moment and then pressing a kiss on his head. That reminded him of how Gemma still treats him, even though he's now pushing his thirties.

"Gem!" He beamed finally seeing his sister. "Oh, I missed you so much!" He pulled her in a bear hug.

"Oh, I missed you too!" She cooed. "You're gonna break my ribs!" He chuckled, pulling away finally. "How have you been?"

"Ms. Styles, the fitting room is ready for you." A lady approached them there.

"Oh yeah, thank you so much." Gemma beamed, "I'll go put on the dress."

"Of course, of course!" Harry urged her to go after the lady. He took a seat on the sofa, all he knew was this time Gemma was alone as their mum was busy with work. Anne has been helping out Gemma alot recently now that Harry has a shit load of work put on him. He patiently waited for his sister, watching other people get their dresses around the store. Happy tears and excited squeals were to be heard all over the floor.

His sister finally walked out of the fitting room with her finished up dress. It was exactly like the sketch she had shown him a few weeks ago. A fluffy Aline skirt with a bodice with sweetheart neckline. Her hair tied up in a low bun with the veil pinned in. He stood up from his place.

Now that made everything all the more legit to him.

He clearly remembers how he was accusing for being a drug dealer at eight for something she did to piss him off as if it was just yesterday, now she's all dressed up to be married. Yes, she's the older one but he's still brother. He's always seen her like a princess and his mum a a queen growing up.

"Awh, Harry!" Gemma cooed watching him get all teary eyed. She walked to him to hug him.

"You look so gorgeous!" He mumbled to her. Gemma pulled away to take a look at him, she just chuckled watching a tear make it's way down his cheek. She wiped it off cupping his face before hugging again. He hugged her back, rubbing her back twice, letting her go so she can do what they're here for.

During the appointment, he gave his own little insights what should be added more to the dress, whilst Gemma gave in her own about the fit of dress to her comfort.

Later that afternoon he was dragging her with him to a Tiffany store. She haven't picked out jewellery to go with her dress, and he had exactly piece in his mind from the last time he was there with his wife. It was simple diamond necklace made in platinum, a pair of diomond studs to go it.

"Harry you really don't have to." Gemma told him.

"Please, I want to." He made a puppy face, "it's a wedding present to my big sister."

"It's too expensive."

"But you're too precious to me, please lemme do you lemme do this" He insisted. "You can for something else too if you'd like."

"No, this is perfect." She rushed before he was going around looking for something else for her to choose from, probably something more expensive. "Thank you, Harry. You're the best brother anyone could ask for!"

"I love you, Gem, that's all." He chuckled.

"I love you too!" She said firmly.

On her way out, she was back to bullying him as they walked to the restaurant near by for early dinner. The day out with his sister was well spend. Much more happier than his time at home.

Though he haven't shared anything with Gemma about bis failing marriage, she did picked on his low mood. In the fleeting moments, she caught her baby brother lost somewhere or just having his shoulders slumped. He'd pull himself right up when he'd see her noticing him.

He dropped her back to her flat before he was asking his driver to take him to the pub. On the way he made a few calls to appoint a a few helpers at home, making sure they are being offered a fair salary. They already had a cook, because he doesn't have the time to make food and Aella doesn't seem to be interested in cooking or stepping a foot in kitchen unless it's to get something to eat.

He doesn't blame her, he finds cooking a bit exhausting too.

Rich people problems, he taunted himself.

Just when he stepped into the Pub, his eyes caught the sight of the girl. Taking a tray of beer glasses to the table where they held quizzes and little competitions, but today everyone was watching the Euro. He noticed she was dressed in all black, a pair of black baggy jeans, an oversized sweatshirt, but her shoes were white. Or supposed to be white with how beaten up they looked. Her long hair pulled up in a ponytail on the back of her head, and a pair of glasses he'd seen her wear the last time.

He had to keep his feelings in check as he's caught a bit of infatuation with this girl. He's married. Even though he might not be happy in his relationship in the moment, that doesn't mean he shouldn't even be looking at other people. There is nothing that sitting down with his wife and talk it all out wouldn't fix anything, he just needs to be in right state of mind to initiate the conversation.

He went to sit on his usual spot. There were hardly any people around there, everyone huddled up near the projector screen watching the match. Even the barkeep was paying attention to the game. Everyone was interested in the game apart from YN and him obviously.

"Hello," she smiled politely at him. Doing her job.

"Hello." He kep his phone face down on the bar in front of him. "I'll have the same, Whiskey please."

"Alright." She nodded and got him the drink, sticking to the little tip he gave her to pour the rught amount of whiskey in the glass and placed it right in front of him. Immediately got back to her work, taking in more glasses of alcohol to go serve the people sat in the crowd. When she got back, she stopped right by him.

"Oh, hey Harry, I just wanted to thank you for last week for the tip." She started, "my little brother got selected in his Cricket team at school so he needed new sport shoes which are very expensive. Thank you so much for tipping, even though I was being hesitant to take it. I wouldn't be able to buy him a pair otherwise."

Now that warmed his heart, the cash went to a very good use. "Aw, it's alright, love. I'm happy fo hear that."

She just smiled at him again and got back to her work. Never looked back, unless he needed another drink.

Now all she did was thank him for helping her unknowingly. He ate or drank outside rarely (though it's becoming a norm for him to visit this pub now a days), everytime he made sure to leave a generous tip for the people doing their job.

He had the same job at one time, and he knew how rude some self entitled people can get. He's managed to stay that grounded with his success.

She still had his heart fluttering in his chest as he watched her go about her evening. Working herself to exhaustion.

He couldn't but notice the way she just kept going, around drunk people. Her dark hair pulled up in a bun held up on the back of her hair with a green claw clasp, little pieces of hair falling onto her face.

"How old is he?" He spoke, initiating the conversation.

"Hmm?" YN looked at him as she was too busy putting back the clean glasses on the shelves. "Oh, he's twelve." The smile on her pushed her cheeks up, making her pretty eyes grow smaller.

"You aren't watching the game?"

"I am more into Cricket, actually." She shared, "I don't quite understand football. Don't you wanna watch it?"

"Oh no, I'm here for just a little bit then I'll be heading home." He rushed.

Honestly, he did enjoyed watching football because his wife did. They were friends throughout the highschool, and she played in the girls football team. One of the many reasons why he fell for her in the first place. Luckily they got into same college and started dating, got married after graduation and now there they are. He's sat in a pub downing his third Whiskey for the night, and she is god knows where.

Aella wasn't home when he left for work. He hasn't heard from her since.

He had two more tonight, before he was heading home. Leaving another big tip for YN.

......................................................................

It was a Monday morning, which meant chaos in YN's household.

Being the eldest of five siblings, she is always crushed by her little brothers and sister.

They all lived in a two bedroom flat, clearly not enough room for family of eight. Though, her parents were the most calmest, her dad passed out drunk his ass off on the sofa in the living room, she's in kitchen making breakfast for everyone.

YN was was just moving around the house, getting ready to leave for work whilst her siblings ate their breakfast, when she almost tripped over her dad passed out fast asleep on the rug in living room.

"Adi, who gave him money to go out drink last night?" She asked, as it reeked on alcohol that early in the morning in the living room, obviously she looked at the second eldest.

"Don't look at me like that, I haven't even seen him in five days!" Adi raised his hands up.

"Maa, did you?" She walked in the kitchen to watch her mum just doing ber work, acting nonchalant. That made her loose her mind there. "Haven't I told you clearly, not to give him any cash?" She asked.

"Maa, fucking answer me!" She raised her voice. "I work my ass off just for you to go on and feed to his addiction, huh? I can't fucking believe you!"

"Watch your language, you're talking to your mum!" Her mum raised her voice even louder.

"Don't tell me to watch my language, when you can't watch your actions." She pointed out the very obvious, the bulging stomach of her mum. "Just for your fun of few minutes you're ruining our lives here, you can't watch that?"

"YN, please it's eight in the morning." Adi spoke.

"Shut the fuck up and eat your breakfast!" She scolded the boy, "if I see either you give even a pound to either her, or him, you'll be grounded for good. Do you hear me?"

"Yes!" The boy nodded.

What was the reason behind her sudden outburst, you may wonder?

It was because, she works three jobs to look after brothers and sister, when their parents can't clearly do that. Her dad's an alcoholic and her mum doesn't simply cares. It's a rare thing that she's even up in the morning stepping a foot in the kitchen for any other reason than to eat.

Yes, that's not the only job of a mother to do. But she doesn't have an actual job, she doesn't help around the house, or have she ever helped around with the kids.

It is her who pays all the bills, pays the rent, pays for groceries, and even kids' school fees. Her little brothers could help just so much working part time, the eldest of the boys are eighteen and sixteen. The youngest born being three, and another sibling on the way.

Yeah, it was fucked up. Quite literally!

Somehow she had just managed to get her degree, on wil full scholarship, and it was just her and three of her brothers (which out of two also had full scholarship paying for their school fees) when her parents shared the new of a new baby. Well, that wasn't a problem until their mother started to neglect them either. YN has had it enough when they welcomed the youngest, a girl three years ago.

Apart from working a desk job from Monday to Friday, doing all ghe over time shifts to the point her boss has to force her to take days off so she doesn't sue the firm in future, to working odd jobs on weekends just so she can eat with her brothers and little sister. It was atrocious how their parents treated them, for her to work herself to exhaustion just for her mum to go on give her dad money to go out and get drunk his ass off. She trusted her mother, really did, that is she doesn't want to get a job or even help around the house that much, at least she can go get groceries.

"Come on now, if you all done with your breakfast." YN looked down grabbing her bag to leave for work, she walks her siblings to school everyday.

"YN, you know I'm doing my best to help you right?" Adi spoke walking along his big sister's side as the other kids walked ahead.

"I know, but I want you to focus on your studies first." YN shared. He's a clever boy, and loves to study. "Thank you for helping around though. I really appreciate that!"

He chuckled, "your welcome!"

"Now come on, best of luck for your test."

"How do you know that?" He stood there in surprise at the gate of his school. YN just shrugged.

"Bye, see you tonight. Please take the kids straight home."

"I will, I will." With a salute to his sister he walked back in.

YN made her way to her office taking a train. I was a small firm where she got to do her intership. She hoped to work an extra intership and study further just so she can get her dream and not be stuck being an accountant. No doubt she likes her job, it's a teeny bit enjoyable too, but it doesn't pay her enough to take care of the family she was born in. That makes her hate her job in this firm.

She needed an extended intership to apply at her dream company, Styles and Co., one of her favourite textile and fashion company in the city. The firm was very particular about hiring new people into their work family. The post she wanted to apply for paid so well. But she was stuck to get a proper job which paid her to survive.

It was like salt on her wounds seeing the building stand tall on her way to work everyday there. She glanced at the building, with the company name written in big, bold letters in gold on the building. Sighing she fixed her gaze on the ground as she walked two buildings down, but she bumped into someone.

"Oh!" She gasped, a steady hand on her arm prevented her from falling straight on her ass in the middle of the pavement.

"You alright?" She heard a deep voice.

"Yeah." She nodded finally looking up at the man dressed in a baby pink suit. To her surprise it was was the man from the bar where she worked on weekends. "Oh hi."

"Hello love, good morning." He beamed as dimples dented deep in his cheeks. "How come you're here?"

"Oh, I work two buildings down." She said.

"At the Darwin's, that Finance company?" He asked, surprised and confused. "Thought you worked at the pub?"

"I do, on weekends." She smiled, now getting awkward as he was trying to get to know her work life, "you work here?" She pointed at the building she can only dream to work at.

Harry looked at her trying to hold back his smile, "yeah. I do work here." He didn't wanted to tell her that that was his firm.

"Oh, nice." She nodded, feeling the jealousy build up in her chest all of a sudden. No wonder how he was so well dressed all the time, and leave her huge tips at the pub. She wanted to work there too! "Anyway, I'm getting late for work."

"Yeah, see you around." He said, watching her throw a petite wave at him as she started walking down the street to her work place.

Her heart was thumping against her chest as if it was about burst out of it's cage anytime soon. She could feel the lingering touch of his hand on her bicep still, she didn't know he was holding to keep her steady. It would be a lie to not say that YN's caught on a tiny little crush on this man who she'd met all for five times with brief interactions.

He's extremely polite and a complete gentleman. And also he's so darn pretty. Eyes green as a spring garden, skin as soft looking as a peacock feather, smile as bright as a ray of first morning sunshine. His aura was nothing but pretty pink and golden shades to her. As if he's human form of a golden retriever. Or maybe that's her mind putting together his image as a person in her imagination.

She haven't slept thinking about him late at night.

Yeah, she's fucked. She doesn't know shit about him and she's going crazy like a teenager for someone she saw at the place of weekend job. Or maybe she's just too lonely that it's her subconscious trying to help her with her loneliness. Shaking her head she got to work, longing into her work system.

"Hey YN." She heard Tom, her co-worker who was also her classmate in uni, who annoying worked in the cubical next to hers.

"Hi." She mumbled.

"How is your day going so far?" Tom asked.

"Good, yeah it is good." She nodded, frustratingly.

"Good to know." He nodded, taking a moment before he spoke again. But YN got a call from the manager asking her to go see him.

Tom never bothered YN for the rest of the day. It was after break that YN felt her frustration and anger melting down.

"You know he likes you." Jamila, the girl who sat on the other side of YN spoke, taking full advantage of Tom still being on his linch break.

"Who?" YN stopped her work to look at the curly haired girl next to her.

She leaned back on her chair, "Tom. He likes you and has been trying to ask you out."

"What? Did he tell you that?"

"Yeah, he did. Remember the last time you were being kicked out to take a vacation?" Jamila reminded her.

"Thay was like a year ago." YN added.

"Yeah!" The girl exclaimed, "he's in love with you! But you keep pushing away the poor boy away!"

"Boy? He's a thirty year old man." YN scoffed jokingly.

"And you're twenty-seven. What does it matter? He's an amazing guy." She pressed. It was true. Tom is truly an amazing guy. He's polite, caring and understanding. He certainly doesn't take no shit from their manager like others. He listened to YN sob once when her boyfriend broke up with her, because she didn't had time for him. He does all the bare minimum.

"I think you should put an halt to taking care of the kids who aren't really your responsibility, and give time to yourself." Jamila spoke, "it's time for your mum to be a grandma and she's popping out another kid when she can't take care of the six she already got. That's not fair for you."

"I don't want to talk about that now, Jamila." YN sighed getting back to her work, "those kids are my siblings, I love them."

Jamila didn't wanted to ruin her mood already, so she stopped there.

"Coffee for the ladies!" Tom announced as he placed a cup of coffee each on his colleagues' table, he placed a sandwich he got from the canteen downstairs on YN's. That's when she realised she haven't gotten up from her chair for her break.

"Thanks." She acknowledged the sweet gesture.

"No problem." He smiled and got back to his work.

On the other hand, Harry was surprised to see Aella at his office for the fifth time from last week. He saw from the little window which gave him clear view of the management floor talking to his PA. It gave him hope, that she's there to see him. Talk to him. Maybe they could go out to get lunch, but instead she dropped the lunch on the PA's desk and walked off to where he doesn't know.

His heart sunk to his stomach as he felt a headache burning behind his eyes. He heard a knock on his door which got him sniffling as he looking up. "Come in, please."

"Sir, Mrs. Styles left lunch for you." Mike said.

"Oh, yes please leave it on the table." Harry smiled, "thank you."

"Sure sir." Mike placed the paper bag on the coffee table in his cabin and left.

It was an hour later when he got a notification five thousand pounds being debited from the joint account he had with his wife. It was ridiculous how she spent money like there's no tomorrow. But if he says anything she's going to make a huge fuss about it. So he just went on with his day.

He couldn't take it. He called his assistant to tell him that he's leaving early today. And he did. He was going straight home.

Harry really wants to work this out with his wife. Getting a divorce felt so wrong to him, especially thinking back at how miserable his own parents were. But he's miserable staying in this marriage.

Just as he was waiting for the lift, placing an order for flowers to pick up on the way home on his phone he saw Aella was still there. She was leaving his Financial Advisor's office there.

"Aella?" He said, catching her like a deer in headlights. "What are you doing here?" It was inevitable to deny that his heart beat picked up a pace in his chest with a racing mind his skull.

"Harry, I, uhhh, I was just saying Hi to Richard." She stuttered with a smile on her face. "You, ehm, you want to go home now?"

As if the universe was coming to rescue her the lift door opened with a ding. Harry followed her in. He doesn't want to make a commotion in his office. He was going to wait until in the comfort of their house to even say a word.

......................................................................

"Kids!" YN announced when she got back home with a cake and a few balloons. "Come on, come on!" It was the little Zara's birthday.

The sleepy four year old was having a hard time staying up, on the sofa as their dinner was served close to midnight. It broke YN's heart to see the kids have their dinner this late. She wished he had extra hours in day for this. Their parents already starting to argue like everyday, today the topic was Mac and cheese for dinner.

But she urged the kids to one of the bedrooms so they can celebrate without seeing their parents arguing. She doesn't want the little girl's birthday to be ruined.

Zara was the youngest amd all four of her brothers are very protective of her so if YN. She's spoilt with so much love from her siblings there.

"Happy birthday to you." Every sang little Zara the birthday song as Adi lit the candles on the cake. "Happy birthday dear tiny little Zozo, happy birthday to you!"

"Yay!" YN cheered.

"Blow on the candles." Adi suggested. The little girl could do so much, so YN blew on the candle herself.

"How old are you?" YN asked.

"Four!" Zara held out five fingers instead making her siblings laugh.

"Silly, that's five." The second youngest, Sid giggled pointing out the obvious.

"That's okay." YN cooed, "come on let's eat the cake now!"

The kids went absolutely ham on the cake after eating the shitty mac and cheese their mum made. It was gone and gone. Zara was a mess with chocolate all over tiny hands and chubby cheeks. YN had her cleaned up and changed into clean clothes before she put her off to bed.

"Come on, boys off to bed you go." She announced. "Uh, before you go to bed, throw you laundry in the machine."

"Yes!" Samar, the third youngest said as he walked out with Sid.

"YN, did you got paid today?" Veer, the second oldest of the boys said.

"No, I went to help my friend at her shop after work. I'll get paid by tomorrow, why?"

"No, I just asked." He shrugged.

"What's wrong?" YN stopped him.

"We haven't paid for internet in past two months, I need to do my projects. Doesn't mean I got selected in the cricket team I don't have to do the projects." He shared, "Adi doesn't even let me use the laptop, and the computers at school suck!"

"Why doesn't he let you use the laptop?" She walked her to the boys' room which they all shared, "Adi, why don't you let him use the laptop for the projects?"

"He never asked me!" Adi defended himself. And the boys started arguing. It took YN a good half an hour to resolve the fight being a median when things escalated.

"I'll pay for the Wifi tomorrow after I get, no more fighting now. Go to bed." YN warned the boys before she walked out closing the door behind her. She put the laundry the machine and started it so it is all done by the morning, before she went to bed herself. It was their daily shenanigans, fighting and arguing with one another for something or other.

......................................................................

"Why were in Richard's office, Aella?" Harry asked.

"I told you, I was saying hi to him."

"Yeah? It took you three hours to say hi to him?" He could feel his heart thumping in his ears at this point. "Admit it Aella, there is no running away from this."

"Admit it god damn it!" He yelled when she said nothing. "Why?"

"What do you mean?"

"What do I mean? Why? Why would you go on and cheat!" He felt his eyes tearing up, "I have been trying my best to make this right, every time I come to talk to you. You just scoot away! Why?"

"I am so sorry, Harry." She looked down at her feet, "I am so sorry, you just haven't been there for lately."

"So you go on and cheat instead of talking this through with me?" He broke down, plopped down on the breakfast bar chair.

"You have been busy lately you don't even look at me!" She cried, "I couldn't take it. I am sorry that was so stupid of me."

"How long?" He asked, holding back tears. "How long have this been going on?" But she didn't say a word to him, "fine. Just leave me alone."

"Harry, please." Aella grabbed onto his hand, so tight it was sure going to redden his skin, "please! I am so sorry. Please, please, please let's just talk this through. I can't. I am sorry."

"Just leave me alone, Aella. Just..." He pulled his wrist out of her grip carefully before he walked back to his (guest) bedroom.

......................................................................

These past few months has been nothing but shit. He found out his wife has been cheating on him. With his Financial Advisor, Richard from past one year. It has been going on for a year. Richard was fired to say the least.

It has been a lot for him, mentally and emotionally.

It wasn't in him to even look at the woman he love and adore since he was eighteen. Twelve years she threw under the bus like it was no one's business. But he found himself going to therapy with her. Today was their fourth session and he just can't even get through it with her sat next to him. Harry doesn't even know how Aella convinced him to go to couple's therapy, or where he got the energy to put with the four sessions along her side.

She was back at it again. Taunting him for busy with work, not helping her around, not allowing her to use the credit cards for her shopping anymore was the new one, along with him asking her to look for a job now. He hadn't spoken a word about her choice on being a housewife, it was her choice and he was very willing to take care of her when they got married. It was what they agreed upon. But her spending have been going way out of hand for Harry to even fathom how she could be spending thousands and thousands of pounds on things she doesn't even use. Even once. She needed a bit of humbling, that's what their therapist suggested.

It wasn't something knew but happening since they got married and it had started to bother him now. He tried his best to express what he was feeling and yet have her lash out on him for not respecting her own life decisions. Even going as far as to reminding him the vows he said to her.

It was yet another weekend when Harry found himself walking in the pub again.

"Can I have one old fashioned please?" Harry asked the bar keep who was surprising working on the side he usually sits today. He saw YN walking around picking up empty glasses of liquor around the pub and bringing them back to clean them up and put them back, that's what he's seen her do all the time here.

"Hi, Harry!" She greeted him once she noticed him sitting there, continuing her work.

"Hello," he found himself smiling back at her. She was wearing the same black jeans and a different black hoodie this time. It has started to get cold he'd noticed. The same pair of glasses perched up on the bridge of her nose. He noticed the new pink tint on her cheeks and lips, the length to her eye lashes behind her glasses- maybe she's wearing a new mascara!

"How was your day?" Yeah, that question was coming from him. He was making up the conversation again.

"It was pretty shit." She shrugged, wiping the glasses and putting them away one by one, "my manager at my desk job basically confiscated my work phone and laptop so I take the yearly paid vacation."

"Why would that be a shit day?" He was surprised, "you should happy about it."

"Not when you-" she paused not wanting to tell her life struggles to this man she has met only handful of times, "when you need the job so bad."

"Doesn't your job pay you well?" He took a big gulp of his drink and she just shrugged.

She wasn't to stand there and tell him most of it goes to paying, rent and bill and paying up for her second youngest brother's school fees. That she needs to work those extra jobs to really be able to get groceries and things which are required without any announcement or signs. Like new shoes for the kids, new clothes, new books, new stationary, a new bag pack and what not! Plus the yearly school fees for the kids who don't yet have scholarships.

"I see." He finished up his drink.

YN cringed at watching people drink around her when she despise her own father for doing the same. Why wouldn't she, this thing has torn her family apart to shreds. She hated to work here but it paid more than half of what her desk job pays her monthly.

Her father was fired from his job when her oldest (little) brother was born, because he would sneak alcohol in his water bottles. Her mother never worked, but she stopped caring once it was all too much for her. But one constant thing is that they keep having kids. Which is annoying. Very fucking annoying.

"How was your day?" She asked.

She wanted to keep up with the conversation!

"It was pretty shit for me too." He shrugged. Because it was true. He'd just walked out of the therapy session with his cheating wife.

"Did your boss force your to take days off too so you wouldn't sue their firm?" She smirked a cheeky little smile, "or did they force you to come to office?"

He chuckled, "the former."

Liar!

"Awh! I understand that." She cooed, "I hope you enjoy your paid vacation!"

"I hope so too." He nodded and ordered himself another drink.

"Mhmm!" She affirmed, "are you planning to go anywhere?"

And they talked about his imaginary and impromptu vacation to the Bahamas, and what he would like to do there. He just wasn't going to break her bubble there. She thinks he's just guy who works a very well paying job at one and not an actual CEO and owner of a multi-million dollar firm.

It was grounding but he also like how she found him and his talk interesting enough to care. Even about his fake plans there.

She didn't lash out on him at any point. She listened to him. Gave her own little views. Like how he should try all the coconut drinks and goodies and the local food at his trip to Bahamas which he's planning on to cancelling the very next weekend he sees her. Until she told him she would be continuing to work at the pub for the rest of ber two weeks off.

He forgot his second old fashioned he ordered as it was there. Especially when she started talking about his firm and how she wanted to work there but their skill requirements are something which will take her another life to acquire, having no idea she was talking to the CEO.

It was way better than going to couple's therapy.

Though he thinks he needs therapy. But the solo ones.

He made sure to leave her and the bar keep separate tips, being biased on her even though she didn't serve him anything tonight.

"You can't keep giving me big tips, Harry." She said, holding the money in her shaky hands, "I'd feel too bad to keep it every time."

"Please, it might help plan yourself a little trip to somewhere." He suggested.

Yeah, probably up till the grocery store...?

But she didn't wanted to argue with that so she went on with her work after he finally left. She'd spent her entire shift there. It was one in the morning, she needed to head home. So she clocked out and started making her little (very long) treck to the train station.

It wasn't until she sensed a car coming to an halt where she just passed and someone walking behind her closely. She pulled out her pepper spray from the water bottle compartment and had her fist ready.

"YN, don't punch me!" She heard the voice which was talking her ears off not even ten minutes ago.

"Oh my god!" She let out a gasp of relief. Sort of. If it weren't of him holding onto her hands she would have been lying on the ground, passed out.

She only knew his first name for god's sake!

"You alright?" He asked.

"Mhmm. I was just walking home. What are you doing here?"

"I was heading home too when I saw you walking down the pavement alone this late." He explained, "you want me to drop you off?" He saw someone following her close by there.

"No, it's okay." She smiled hesitantly.

"Oh, I'm sorry. We've met handful of times, I shouldn't have said it like that." He cleared his throat, "but I promise you can trust me." He looked glanced behind him as he could hear foot steps coming their way.

"It's okay, Harry, I am gonna take the train." It wasn't assuring enough for him.

Just as Harry was about to tell her he saw someone following her at a distance, that guy got close by, snatching her bag he ran away. Every happened in the blur but she saw the little blade in the hand of that person.

"No, wait!" She called Harry as he was about to take off after the guy, "He's got a knife with him."

"Don't you have your valuables in the bag?" He asked but grabbed her hand to drag her near his car with him just to be safe.

"No, I have my wallet in my pocket here. Just an extra jacket in the bag." She shared, "it's okay. Thank you though. At least have my pepper spray with me, it was very expensive."

"How did you see he's got a knife with him?"

"I've got four eyes on, Harry." She grinned making him chuckle. "Anyway, I'll head home now."

"YN, please. Someone just stole from you." He insisted, "lemme call a cab for you, yeah?"

"Harry it's fine." She reassured him. "I will manage."

"You sure?" He doesn't want to push her.

"Yes, I am very sure."

"Okay." He nodded.

......................................................................

The very next night, Harry went to the pub again. He needed to because he went to another therapy session with Aella today, he hated himself that much more for going through that instead of saying no.

It was crowded and YN was busy most of the time. But he got to talk to her, a little bit, but she asked him about his vacation. Which he "cancelled" the moment he planned it.

That went on for a week. And they became really good friends in no time. His growing crush on her was inevitable to stop, especially when he couldn't stop flirting with her. Especially when she sometimes flirt back.

"Like, come on Harry! You've got a wife at home!" He scolded himself, especially when he never once mentioned that he's married. He just couldn't bring himself up to do that.

But he started walking her down to the tube station, he still haven't got her number. He just can't bring himself to ask for it, he still carried the guilt of talking to another woman whilst he's still married. He wasn't going to do the same to Aella. That's just not him.

They're not in pre-school anymore to play tit for tat.

He's stuck though. He doesn't know how to approach it but he can't be with Aella or anyone for the matter of fact when he's that broken. His new budding feelings were just adding upto his confusion that much more.

Aella has been cheating on him for over a year. Maybe is it was a one time thing, he might have thought about giving her and those therapy sessions time. The therapist was going a shit job as well. He couldn't fathom how she lived under same roof as him when she was sleeping with someone else this whole while without any guilt. He no longer felt the love and warmth with her and from her that he used to, god knows how long ago. And here he was feeling guilty to even talk to YN, even if that meant as a friend.

Tonight, he still walked her to the tube station. She asked him about his mum and sister, that's all they talked about. He's yet to tell her that he's the owner of the firm she was admiring that day when she bumped into him. She's yet to tell him about her own family, though she hardly ever talks about herself. She was scared of scaring him off like she scared off her ex-boyfriend.

All he knew was she was the oldest of her siblings. That's all he knew.

Harry has got many, many, many more questions to ask to her to get to know her well.

"How were you so chill about your bag being stolen the other day?" He brought up a new topic to speak on as they were walking in complete silence. She just shrugged.

There was nothing in her bag really that day, just an old jacket that got stolen. It was better to loose the bag and that piece of clothing than have anyone go after a person with a sharp object. Plus that wasn't the worse thing happened to her. Was she upset? Yes, that was her favourite jacket. But at least no one got hurt, at least her pepper spray wasn't stolen and she didn't throw a punch at Harry.

YN walked beside him in a straight but she found him scooting closer and closer until his arm brushed against her. He hasn't had a drink today, he did asked for one but it just sat in front of him as he chatted away with her.

He has been wanting to hold her hand but her hands were stuffed in pockets of her coat. It was very cold.

"Well, I guess I'll see you tomorrow?" He asked once he'd made sure she'd get in safe in the train.

"I'd say no." She said. "It's none of my business to have a say, but I think we're friends, so as a friend I'd say it's really not good for your health to drink everyday, Harry."

She wouldn't say that to anyone because, well, she was getting good tips and she needed those badly but, she's grown to like Harry quite a bit. Her infatuation on him have grown quite a bit as well. He's a great person afterall! Him talking about his mum and sister is just enough to tell how he treats them. He has been respectful towards her even when he's flirting with her sometimes.

Plus he's very good looking. That's an added bonus.

"Can I kiss you?"

Oh fuck no!

That got her heart pumping as it jumped in her ear, making her tummy do back flips. He stood towering in front of her, way too close that she could feel his aura. Him smirking made her realise she was chewing on her lip as she nodded, muttering a quiet yes.

Of course she said yes!

Harry didn't needed much more talking or convincing, as he reached up cradle her face in his palm. But she stopped him, stepping back. Her fingers lightly wrapped around his anchor tattoo.

"Is that a wedding band?" She asked seeing a plain ring on the fourth finger of his left hand, his usual chunky rings were missing tonight. "Are you married?" It broke Harry's heart to see tears well up behind her glasses, and she took another step back.

He honestly didn't know how he should answer her because it was very obvious. There was no excuse he could make other than admit to her.

"Yes, but-"

"There shouldn't be a but!" She interrupted him, "you're cheating on your partner!"

"YN, please, I, I don't know how to explain but this it's not what you're thinking, love."

"It's exactly what I'm thinking." She stated the obvious, "don't ever talk to me again please."

She left him standing there.

......................................................................

YN couldn't work on weekends anymore, and she took on afternoon shift at work because her mum gave birth to another boy. Luckily the baby wasn't born cranky like others.

It only put more toll on YN alone.

"YN? You alright?" Adi asked who was helping his sister in the kitchen.

"Yeah." She nodded. "Watch your fingers!"

"Oh!" He realised the knife was too close to his fingers as he chopped tomatoes.

"Idiot." YN chuckled smacking him on his shoulder.

After lunch most of the kids were off to sleep, she didn't knew where her dad was he's got an habit that he goes missing for days and then returns back home tk shower and eat, her mum was fast asleep with the new baby. She told Adi to look after the kids for a little bit if they needed anything so she can go take a nice walk.

It was a Sunday night so she was home all day. YN sat down on the bench at the park, there were still few people around but it was getting darker. She pulled out her phone to watch something as she doesn't get much time to do so.

Honestly she has been sulking since the night she last saw Harry. She had no idea he was married already. Maybe if she had asked...

YN had never showed any interest in dating or having a romantic life in all. She had too much on her plate to be a good enough partner to someone. But it was getting harder to keep her feelings in check with him.

Just when she swiped over open Google after putting on her earphones with music on to look at the recent Share values for her work and personal purposes, a article popped up on the new feed.

Divorce Notice: Styles & Co. Owner and CEO, Harry Styles gets cheated on by his wife.

Now she was surprised to see Harry's face plastered on the article cover with a blonde woman. It wasn't something she had ever expected to be.

Styles & Co. owner was in Top 10 richest man in the England, but no one hardly knew about him as a founder and CEO but all about his textile and fashion company. YN has been a huge nerd when it comes to business. She read many business magazines but none of then had even a single picture of Harry. There must have been a possibility which she must have missed by chance as there was a picture of him from one of the many formal events with his wife on his side.

Please give her benifit of the doubt, there are hundreds if not thousands of Harrys in this world!

But never once did she thought that the Harry who visited the pub she worked weekend shifts at would be one of the richest man in England. He was too humble, well spoken, and polite to be a millionaire. And no wonder why he felt her such heavy tips after.

She was furious on herself for potentially breaking up a relationship. She didn't wanted to click on the link, but she turned off her music and did. He was married to her for eight years! They have been together since they were eighteen. There were mentions of even Harry cheating on his wife with a random girl he was spotted with at a club last weekend, blurry pictures of him at the club were attached as receipts, and also written rumours of him seeing other people as well. And that Harry have file for a divorce and sued his (ex) wife for defamation as there were articles about him published two weeks back as well.

She realised she shouldn't have gotten that attached him when they would meet barely for three hours every night for a week and half. She needed to get her attachment issues in check. She was insanely jealous and heart broken she felt when she found out he was married. But she hated herself to not ask him about anything else.

It was a good thing she didn't proceeded with the kiss, not anyone with a sane mind to kiss a married person. But that would leading him on like he did to her by keeping such a huge secret from her. Yes, she haven't told him about her family situation, she doesn't like to tell her traumatic family story to her friends. She wasn't ready. She has her siblings to look after because they have no one to do that.

It was a good thing she didn't kiss him that night!

......................................................................

YN was on her way to work, her desk job on the Friday a week later she had read the article.

Her sulking have gotten worse at home. She was lashing out on her siblings and mother for no reason (well, she had many reasons with her mother). She had been feeling sad, angry, heart broken, guilty and every negative feeling a human can go through. She didn't wanted to celebrate her birthday day before.

Her time went by so fast that she didn't even realise it was time for lunch break, so she headed down stairs to the lobby to get some fresh air and a coffee to keep her up. She haven't been sleeping well either. Just when she was about to walk back to her floor the security guard stopped her.

"Ms. YLN." He called, "someone had these delivered under your name." The man handed her a small bouquet of all pink roses, tulips and carnations, a box of some fancy chocolate which looked very fucking expensive for some reason. She took it and walked upto the sofas kept in the lobby. She placed her coffee cup on the coffee table in front of her along with the chocolate box and plucked out the yellow note.

I'm extremely sorry for what happened that night, I had no bad intentions. Had no reason to basically do something so bad which was happening to me. Hope you like these flowers! Please call me if you think you can forgive me.

Ps. We have a spot for Financial Advisor in my company, would love to have you join our team. Let's at least be friends.

-H

It was all written in messy writing in block letters with red ink. A number scribbled over in the corner with a messy heart drawn as a punctuation at the end of him signing off. On the back of the note said something more.

Please do call me. I'll be looking forward to it. Please?

At the end of the day, YN was walking back home. Bouquet of flowers tucked in between her her chest and arms delicately. She had saved Harry's number on her phone so she pulled up her number to call him finally. He picked up on the third ring.

"Hi, Harry." She spoke, slowing down as she neared his firm.

"Hi, you called!" He celebrated on the other side, a clear sigh audible, "Are you off work now? I wanted to talk."

"I'm on my way back home."

"I, I am still stuck at work, would, would you mind coming up? I, I don't want to talk about this over a phone call. Please?" He plead. His voice wavered, maybe it was him feeling or the poor network connection. YN didn't know if she should go in at his work place. "Come up, I'll ask the receptionist to send you up, please!"

"I- uhhh, okay, okay." She sighed.

"Stay on the phone, okay?" He requested, the line went silent for a bit. "Walk right in."

So she did. The receptionist told her the way to his office. His office was everything she imagined it to look like from the inside, marble floor so clean you could see your face in it, glass cubicles, separated offices for the higher level management on the fourth floor. She took the stair to the third floor for a reason. It was all empty by now, the second floor which was the accounts department. Third floor was all things fashion she did not understand but found very fascinating. A few people still working. She felt very under dressed walking through the floor to another set stairs to the fourth floor, in her blue baggy jeans and long sleeved t-shirt. Her work place didn't had any dress code necessarily, unless the employees are dressed appropriately even if it's something casual.

"Hi, I am here to see Mr. Styles." YN approached the desk out of office at the very end of the hall.

"YN?" The man asked.

"Yeah."

"That's Mr. Styles' office, you can go right in." He pointed at the big brown door.

YN could see Harry already walking upto the door from the skinny glass window next to the door. Before she could knock, he swung the door open. His classic frog smile plaster on his face, wide and happy enough to make his dimples appear evidently on his cheeks. Without a word he stepped aside and let her walk in before he gently shut the door behind him, pulled the blinds down on the skinny window by the door and walked her to the sofa area in his office, opposite to his desk.

"What would you like?" He asked, picking up the receiver to his desk phone. "Coffee? Tea?"

"I, I am good thank you." She stuttered feeling awkward standing there not knowing what to do. The sofa looked way too good and expensive for her to put her butt on it. But she saw still muttering something in the phone quickly.

"Why don't you have a seat?" He suggested already taking a seat on the end of the sofa. She did the same, placing her new bag she thrifted the other day on the floor and the bouquet of flowers on the coffee table carefully. She sat by the edge on the cushion. Harry caught on that but said nothing.

"You wanted to talk?" She asked.

"Mhmm." He nodded, eyes glazed on moony shimmer as he looked at her with his teeth burying in his bottom lip, "about that night, YN, I want to apologise first and explain to you what really happened."

"Why didn't you ever tell me about you being married? You told me nothing about you but at the same time you told me everything!" Her voice wavered as her vision went water with tears. Brick by brick her wall was falling apart there.

"Because I was not happy with her." He stated, carefully scooted closer to her but got on the rug on the floor next to her knees making her shift back in her seat. He reached for her hand, giving her the option to go on and hold his if she wanted to, but she chose not to. "I need you to please listen to me, okay?"

"Mhmm." She sounded.

"She was cheating on me, for over a year. I wasn't happy. I don't know why I put up with her for three months after I found out, but I couldn't take it anymore after that night with you. I filed for a divorce." He looked up at her like a little lost puppy, "I feel so guilty for leading you on like that, love, I wish I knew how to fix that."

"Doesn't matter, you are still married to her." She began but he quickly spoke in between.

"Not anymore."

"You were back then!" She got frustrated, "you were going to do the same thing to her."

It hit him in the very next morning after that night which lead him to get a divorce, there was no other choice than to admit to her, "I know, and I am so guilty for doing that."

"I get it." She said but was interrupted by saying anything further hearing the knock on the door. It was his assistant, two cups of tea which he placed on the coffee table and left.

"Look YN, I have spent enough time with me to know how I feel for you. You've become my best friend in no time. Didn't tell you anything because I was afraid you'd treat me differently, was wrong on that too." He dared to hook his pointer finger around hers but she didn't seem to mind, "I have grown to like you so much."

"Harry, I..." She trailed off for a moment, "I can't, I, I am not ready for anything of this sort. I, I mean I'm not— I can't give you the time..."

"I, why not?" He was surprised, "you were going to-"

"I know, I don't want you to bring that up again." She stated, it made her feel to guilty. No matter if she knew the truth now. "I have my siblings to look after, I am always working and I can't give someone the time and energy. It's not fair. For anyone!"

It has been a thing for YN since her brother Adi, the eldest of the boys' was born. She was just ten years old and she taught herself to take care of her baby brother when her mum would up and leave to gossip with the neighbour lady for hours and hours on end, even the entire day. Then two years later came her another brother, and from then their family had grown from family-of-four to noe a family-of-nine. It was hilarious at this point.

Her boyfriend of three years broke up with her within six months of her moving back in with her parents after the youngest of the boys' was born. Merely because she was working two jobs and looking after the kids who weren't hers!

But they are her siblings.

No matter how much she wanted all of the good things for herself, a loving partner, kids of her own, a little family of her own. She had got to fullfill her dream of through the little babies her mum gave birth to but wanted no responsibilities towards. Since her breakup, she never dated again really. Though her colleagues tried to set her up but none of the dates worked out for her. Which she was totally fine with.

Harry looked at her, "look we can take it slow. To be vulnerable with you, I've started to go to therapy- now you're the only I'm sharing this with because I know you're not going to judge me for it- my therapist says I need time. To myself. Which I have plenty of. That is why I offered you the job as our financial advisor so we can still be friends and hang out. I no longer want to drown my sorrows and sadness in alcohol, it's sickening! I, I want a friend like you!"

She watched as he rushed to speak, faster than he usually talks. His nose was turned pick and so were the apples of his cheeks, eye lashes wet from tears brimming in his eyes. Feeling bad, she found herself slipping her hand in his. His skin was warmly comforting against hers. His hand much bigger than hers, Harry noticed.

"You don't know anything Harry, I'm really sorry if I've unknowingly led you on. It wasn't my intention." She mumbled.

"I want to know, I'm here to listen to you like you do to me, love. You know I would never judge you." He admitted. Honestly he wanted that so bad, not just one sided conversation where only he's the one speaking. "You didn't led me onto anything, no apology is needed here. In fact I should be the one apologising."

"You don't know Harry, I've got..." She trailed off, "I, I can't talk about this right now. I'm sorry." Her apology was punctuated with a quiet sob leaving her lips.

"That's okay," he assured her, "it's fine with me." He noticed how she held her breath until she couldn't, showing the sign what he could only make up to be anxiety. "Here." He fetched her a bottle of water from the mini fridge.

He sat there giving her the time to calm herself down because he didn't wanted to intervene and make things worse for her. Later he offered to drive her home which surprisingly she agreed to, she put up her address on his GPS in the car and sat there in silence. Anxious checking every turn he took.

Now YN wasn't embarrassed of her family, though it come like that. She just hated the judgement which came along with it. Both her parents didn't work, one was alcoholic and other simply doesn't want the responsibility. People asked her why did she took care of kids who weren't hers? Well, they're still her siblings. They didn't asked to be brought up into this world. She doesn't want her siblings to go through what she had went through growing up with a pair of parents who should have clearly gotten a divorce the next hour they got married. She stopped talking about it all together when it started to get to her. She was happy with what she had and being the guardian to her siblings.

"Hmm?" She noticed Harry was actually saying something as he took the last turn to her place.

"I said, how is your brother? How's his cricket practice going on?" He asked again.

"Oh, he's doing fine. He had a match yesterday." She shared.

"Should I stop here?" He asked slowing down two buildings down her actual one. But YN saw her brother there coming back home, probably from one of his jobs.

Adi looked at her suspiciously as the car came to an halt next to him. YN opened the door to get out but her brother blocked her.

"Oh hello there mate!" Adi said, "I am YN's brother, Adi."

"Hello." Harry chuckled watching YN roll her eyes. "I'm Harry."

"Nice to meet you Harry!" Adi exclaimed side eyeing his older sister, "how come you know my sister?"

"We're friends." He shared.

"Oh!" Adi dragged, "would you like to come up, have a cuppa?"

Harry glanced at YN awkwardly, "he's got to go, Adi now move away." She tried to shove the boy aside but he wouldn't budge, so she scolded him. Harry didn't understood a word but Adi moved away and went straight to the building. "Thank you for driving me home Harry."

"Don't mention it." He smiled at her.

"I'm sorry about that, little brothers are very annoying sometimes." She said awkwardly, stalling long enough to make it known she didn't wanted to go. But she had to go, the kids were probably on their own and doing as they please instead of doing their homework.

"Hey!" He complained, "not all little brothers are annoying!" She just chuckled knowing why he was defending the boy he just met, he's probably got an older sister as well!

"Harry, you've become a really good friend over these past few months." YN shared, "thank you so much for everything."

"If anything, I should be the one thank you for listening to me rant." A sheepish smile took over his gorgeous features, "most people find me annoying because I talk slow and shit."

"It's not annoying." She shook her head.

"I'm going to believe you here."

"Anyway, I should go." She said getting out but stopped and plucked out one pink rose from her bouquet and gave it to him.

"Thank you love." He smirked.

"These are very pretty thank-" she was interrupted by Adi coming back out running with a crying Zara in his arms making her jump out and run to the kids.

Harry got out as well in shock watching as the boy explained to his sister what must have happened. Adi was holding onto the little girl's arm securely.

"What happened?" Harry dared to asked.

"Harry, oh my god you're still here!" YN breathed out in relief, "please would you take us to the nearest hospital?"

"Of course, get in." He agreed in a heartbeat. Adi hopped into the backseat with the crying girl next to YN and Harry zoomed to the nearest hospital.

"I think she broke her arm." Adi shared.

After her it's Adi who is there for the kids but he came home late for work. She was pissed that their mum didn't even wanted to keep an eye on the kids that one of them broke an arm literally. Zara was being checked on in the ER when she asked Adi to go back home and check on other kids. She was really furious on her mother.

It was pretty late when the doctors were done treating Zara. She had a cast on which had to be kept on for next two weeks. The little girl was was still overwhelmed by everything, it was the first time she had to be rushed to an ER and hopefully the last time. She looked scared as she lied there with her cast on.

"Harry would you mind staying here whilst I take care of the discharge?" She requested.

"Sure." He nodded.

He sat there by the little girl, "hey, what's your name?"

"Zara." She pouted. "Where is YN?"

"She's gone to take care of a few things so you can home and rest." Harry explained. "I am Harry by the way."

"I want Coco!" She whined quietly. Harry assumed it might be a pet or her stuffed toy.

"Yeah? You miss her?"

"Mhmm." Zara nodded. She's so much like her older sister he noticed there, all same features. YN came back rather quickly.

She had to call up her colleague, Jamila to ask her to lend some money. She had just paid for her mum and took out a loan on her credit card which she's still paying up for. The bank transfer was not going through so Jamila offered to come down to the hospital and pay for the bills.

"I wanna go home." Zara shared with her sister.

"Just a few minutes and we'll go home okay?" YN assured her.

"What's wrong, love?" Harry enquired.

"It's nothing. And Harry, thank you so much for driving us here and waiting here, you really didn't had to but you still did." She smiled, "Thank you."

"No problem, YN." He chuckled.

"I'm just gonna wait for my friend to come here, so you don't have to wait up anymore." YN said urging him, he's done a lot already she doesn't want him to wait up more. It was already close to midnight.

"It's alright, I don't mind waiting up." He assured her. "Nah! No arguing, she's asleep!" He shushed her down, "why did you call your friend over? I would have dropped you back home."

"Oh, it's not that..." She stuttered. She mumble quietly which he couldn't make it but he understood what it was.

"Could have asked me." He sighed standing up from his seat, "come with me." He grabbed a gentle hold on her hand and dragged her out with him.

"Zara's alone the—"

"She's fine there." He interrupted her. "Call your friend up and ask them not to come."

"Harry, listen to me!" She yanked on his hand the best she could to stop him. "I know you want to help, but I can manage to look after my family just fine."

"I'm sorry, YN, but I'm not saying you can't. I'm just trying to help you out here." He explained.

"I really, really appreciate that, Harry. I really do. But you're not going to take it back, are you?"

He just stared at her for a beat, "I will, with twelve per cent interest. Now come on." With that he walked her to the reception and paid for the bills and all, he made YN call her friend and ask them to not go over before dropping her back home. "You want me to carry her upstairs?" He offered, putting his car in park.

"It's alright, I can carry her." She smiled. "Thank you so much for today, Harry."

"Don't mention it." He shook his head chuckling, "hey, YN?"

"Hmm?" She looked up at him stood on the pavement with her sister clung onto her like a baby monkey, fast asleep. She juggled the bouquet of flowers and her keys as well.

"The job post is still available, you can just walk in on Monday for the interview, yeah?" He reminded her.

"Harry, I don't know if I'm qualified enough to be a good Financial Advisor." YN spoke, her voice quiet so she doesn't wake her sister.

"I'm not qualified to be a CEO either," he shrugged.

"Okay, I'll go for the interview." She nodded, "but don't threatened your HR and Manager, please!"

He giggled, "I won't, I promise."

"Alright." She smiled, "good night, amd thank you so much."

"Stop thanking me now!" He warned her, "and good night."

Harry waited for her to wall back in her building safely before getting back in his car.

At least he's got a good friend if not anything else. But he was unaware of what was to come his way.

......................................................................

N O T E :

Y'all this took me wayyyyyy to long write. I've been writing this from late November last year. Was stuck on how I could have explored the characters mentioned in this one.

I can write more about it, tho I don't know what I can. But if y'all have any suggestions I'll consider them. <3

I really hope y'all like this one. Please leave a comment and tell me how you liked it. Or if you have any suggestions.

......................................................................

Tag list:

@vrittivsanghavi @buckymydarlingangel @sweetwritingfanficfriend @theroosterswife24 @sleutherclaw @melllinaa @michellekstyles @sunshinemoonsposts @marialikescherries @japanchrry @onlyangelrain @originalsoulcollector @harrysgirl-1d

Lemme know if you want to added to the tag list

[sorrowsofsilence]

I Was Always Yours • 2

Pairings: Noah Sebastian x Reader

Words: 5.1k

Part One

Warnings: smut 18+ (mentions of PnV, wrap it b4 u tap it pls), fluff, female/male receiving, anxiety/panic attacks, swearing, alcohol, dirty talk

Summary: You grew up with Nick Ruffilo and Noah, but its been years since you’ve seen your best friends due to them being away touring. When Ruffilo came back to your hometown, opening his home tattoo studio, you get the opportunity to reconnect with him, and Noah. Deep down you’ve always had something for Noah, and it turns out he’s always felt something for you too. Perhaps seeing eachother years later, after you’ve both changed, sparked something.

Authors note: This is part 2! Initially I wasn’t planning on doing a second part but there was a lot of love on the first <3 so thank you! Hope you enjoy this one! (With 2 scenes of smut for all of us sick fucks to enjoy!)

PS. THIS IS A FANFIC ABOUT REAL PEOPLE IN FICTIONAL SCENARIOS. I AM NOT IMPLYING THIS IS HOW THESE PEOPLE ARE IRL OR THAT THIS SITUATION WOULD HAPPEN. IT IS FOR FANFIC PURPOSES ONLY!

Noah’s back rested against the bedroom wall, the red LEDs illuminating his room. The clock read 3am, way past our bedtime, yet here I was, succumbing myself to Noah’s need.

“I can’t stop thinking about a few days ago,” he had said as I sat in his bed, days after we reconnected. I was playing on my phone while he was messing around on his computer, working on music. We had hung out non-stop since seeing each other; catching up, sharing stories, reminiscing, and just spending time together like we used to with an added activity.

“Me either,” I had replied, sitting up as my heart began racing thinking about it. What were we now? Were we still just friends? Things were not the same, things were different, but It was a good difference, it was how things always should’ve been…but was it the right choice?

“Nicks asleep,” he had said, turning his chair to face me. It was silent for a moment, as we had stared at each other, trying to read the expression on one another’s face.

“I need you so bad Y/N, you have me completely whipped.” He had said, before standing up and walking over to me: he had started kissing me rigidly, taking me into his arms.

“You need to earn your way back to my lips,” Noah whispered as he groaned deeply, his long, inked fingers tangled within the strands of my hair, wrapped around in a desirable hold.

He held my head in place firmly as my mouth slid up and down, hand holding the rest, tongue swirling around the tip. My legs supported me from below as I kneeled before him at his mercy.

“Christ Y/N, you got cheated on when you can suck dick like this?” Noah looked down at me, eyes fluttering closed before tilting his head back in bliss. His hips rolled into my face gently, beginning to fuck my mouth as his other hand joined the first, gripping the other side of my head, “Man's fucking loss,” he scoffed in disbelief.

I rolled my eyes and internally laughed, choking on Noah before looking up through my lashes, watching as his mouth hung open slightly, eyebrows furrowed in pleasure. Watching the hold I had over him turned me on immensely. He was falling apart because of me.

I gagged on him for a moment longer, pushing myself as far as I could, before pulling off of him, the string of saliva following my lips.

“Fuck,” Noah gave me a breathy laugh, looking down in awe with a lopsided grin “You were gone from me for too long, you’re telling me we could have been doing this years ago?”

I gave him a small smile, “I think we have a lot of missed time to make up for.”

I wrapped my hand around him, stroking up and down, rotating my wrist, before attaching my mouth to him again. Noah’s hands gripped my hair tighter, keeping me in place once again as he fucked me.

“Such a pretty girl, letting me fuck your mouth like this,” Noah pulled me closer to his abdomen as he hit the back of my throat. I gagged but closed my eyes to keep going.

“Y/N, look at me,” Noah demanded and my eyes snapped upwards towards his own, and he watched me watch him. With his lips parted he observed my every move, heavy pants heaving from his chest, shallow grunts pouring from his soul.

“Shit,” Noah’s body began to twitch, and seconds later my mouth was filled, threads of his release coating the back of my throat.

Noah tucked my hair behind my ears, rubbing his fingers down underneath my chin, “Good girls swallow,” he said, “all of it.”

I moaned at his words and obeyed, watching his eyes glint with satisfaction and complete reverence as I sucked.

Drinking in all of him I pulled away, and Noah leaned down, pulling my chin towards him, planting a kiss on my lips. I melted into him, sighing with contentment as he pulled up his black shorts.

“I was always yours,” he said, “but you keep proving to me that I’m never going anywhere ever again.”

+=+=+=+=+=+=

“Folio, Jolly this is Y/N: Y/N, this is Folio and Jolly,” Noah introduced me officially to Nick and Joakim, the drummer and guitarist, and I immediately felt giddy. Although known Noah and Ruffilo for years, I had never met the other two current members in person; only through photographs.

I had to admit I was a little excited, because I really did enjoy their music, and therefore have always wanted to meet the other two.

“It’s cool to see you guys in person and not on a screen,” I laughed shyly, shaking their hands. Folio squinted with his eyes, his crooked tooth smile even more charming face to face. Jolly pulled me in for a shake and a hug, catching me off guard. I felt flush as his long hair tickled my face, patting his back.

“Nice to finally meet you! Noah hasn’t shut up about you.” Folio said, grinning.

Noah ran up from behind, wrapping his arms around me, and lifting me up. I squealed with my back against his chest, laughing as he swung me around, playfully, “yea, because I missed her,” Noah laughed, placing his face in the crook of my neck, still holding on to me from behind.

I held on to his arms that crossed my chest, blushing at his signs of affection in front of his friends.

“I don’t think I’ve ever seen him this happy.” Jolly smiled warmly, “fucking goof.”

“So, you guys were friends growing up?” Folio asked as we all started walking towards the car. Noah had insisted I ride with the boys to the concert, coming early to spend time and see how everything behind the scenes worked. I told Noah I’d be happy to wait in line with the rest of the crowd, but he was taking this VIP very seriously.

“You want me to punish you if you don’t listen to me?”

Yes please, I had thought; but all I could do was stare up at him as he slowly backed me up towards the kitchen table.

“Noah,” I whined, tilting my head at him as he gripped my hips, his cologne filling my senses, “I’m going to watch the show from the crowd, but I’ll come with you everywhere else.”

My back hit the wood, and Noah leaned over me, placing a kiss on my forehead before kissing down to my lips.

“Good,” he mumbled, his hand sliding around my hip to behind, squeezing me, “but you better be behind the stage by the time I walk off at the end of Dethrone, or we’re gonna have a problem.”

“Yeah, Y/N, Noah and I went to school together,” Ruffilo said, offering me a hand to pull me into the car. I sat between him and Noah, Jolly and Folio sitting in the back row.

“Cool,” Folio said, before drumming on the back of the seat. I watched him, smiling.

“You’re pretty good at that hey?” I said, and he smiled back, shrugging.

“I’m hyped for today, I fucking love this place.”

We started driving towards the venue, and the closer we got to our destination, the more I noticed Noah’s anxiety beginning to spike. The entire time he kept his gaze out the window, hand gripping my thigh, resting his chin on his palm. His leg bounced rapidly, and ever so often I felt his fingers squeeze me, his hand beginning to vibrate.

I looked at him with concern, the smile from my conversation with Jolly fading from my lips as Noah took a brief sharp exhale, staying extremely still except for his leg. I placed my hand on top of his own, and Noah immediately stopped bouncing.

You okay? I mouthed, to which he shrugged, his dark brown eyes looking at me with apprehension before turning his gaze back out the window, the concrete jungle swaying past in a grey, lifeless blur. The boys became quiet, pretending to be preoccupied but watched; knowing that Noah was beginning to have a panic attack.

I flipped our hands, entwining my fingers with Noah’s and resting them on his moving leg, rubbing my thumb delicately across his skin. His hands were clammy but I held on in compassion, creating a soothing, rhythmic touch on the top of his hand. I rested my head on his shoulder, to which he placed his on top of mine.

Without saying anything I began to inhale through my nose, expiring throughout my mouth, and Noah eventually caught on, mimicking my breathing pattern. Opening up his palm, I ran the tips of my finger up and down each appendage, tracing the outline of his hand before circling his palm, moving from the centre outwards, before repeating the pattern. Noah analyzed my movements for a moment longer, and I sat up, turning my body to face him.

He watched me, eyes still filled with worry but transitioning to appreciation, before he closed his eyes, pushing his face into the side of mine affectionately. He stayed there for a moment, the soft breath of his exhale brushing across my cheek. With my free hand, I reached up, pushing the bangs delicately out of his face, running my hands through his hair, hoping the sensations helped distract him from his anxiety, even for a brief moment.

I felt sympathy for him, knowing that this must be the anxiety Nick mentioned that Noah’s struggled with lately. Fans have been crazy, and for someone who has always had a low social battery, I can imagine it must be even more difficult for him.

I gave Noah a small smile, before leaving in, giving him a delicate kiss of love and confidence, showing him that he is supported.

“Better?” I whispered, and Noah squeezed my hand in response, eyes lingering on me for a moment more before he let out another breath.

“I don’t know how I survived so long without you.” He whispered back, almost sighing in relief.

I couldn’t help but blush, resting my head on him again, and he wrapped his arm around me now, leaning me into his chest.

Once we arrived we were rushed into the building. Thankfully there were no fans out yet because we were so early- but I was glad because otherwise, rumours would start. Noah held my hand the entire way, only letting go once we arrived at the green room, and him heading to the washroom.

My eyes followed him as he left, the door closing quickly. I then turned to look at Ruffilo who patted me on the head.

“Nice work Y/N/N.” he hugged me, and I breathed into his chest, sighing.

Folio nodded in agreement, “Wow. I haven’t seen him calm down that fast in a while.”

I frowned, looking at the three of them sadly, “this is a usual occurrence?”

Jolly nodded, “unfortunately. Ever since the fans found out shit about where we lived and dug up stuff from his past, he hasn’t been the same.”

I turned, watching the door, waiting for Noah to return, “that breaks my heart.”

The boys nodded, agreeing.

“But honestly, we still have a fuck ton of fun,” Ruffilo said, reassuring me.

“Yea,” Folio said, beginning to drum the air, “now we get to fuck around until sound check.”

I laughed, “And that means?”

“Tomfoolery,” Jolly said, a glint in his eye, “and shots!”

+=+=

“Fuck I hate vodka,” Noah grumbled, eying the shot glass with a look of disgust, lip curling.

“Don’t be such a pussy, Sebastian,” I raised a brow, the boys cheering as I downed the shot, my nose scrunching as the alcohol burned my throat.

Noah plugged his nose before shooting it back, shaking his head as he swallowed it, coughing.

“That shit is literally vile,” he whined, chugging some juice to mask the flavour.

“Don’t be so dramatic pretty boy, you’re fine,” Jolly laughed, patting Noah’s back.

“You don’t know shit about fuck,” Noah glared, laughing.

“I don’t know shit about fuckin, but I know shit about everything else!” Jolly said, downing a shot himself, and I laughed, smiling harder than I probably have in years.

“Aight boys, time for soundcheck,” Noah said, before extending a hand for me to take. Entwining our fingers he led me with them. I had to admit this was very exciting, getting to see the process of how behind the scenes worked.

Once each section was set up, Folio started drumming, and I watched in amazement as his feet followed his arms, beginning to alternating patterns, hitting the double beat and cymbals.

“He’s extremely talented!” I said, appreciating the opportunity to watch Nick without any other sound present- just the drummer.

“Folio is a complete animal on stage.” Noah agreed, folding his arms and watching in approval.

It was Ruffilo’s turn next, then Jolly, and then Noah.

Noah held the mic close, fiddling with his earpiece, hitting a variety of notes. I watched in amazement, falling completely in love with his ‘acoustic’ voice. It was rare that I got to hear him bare, without any music.

Once they finished, they packed up, and Noah explained how the rest of the show was going to work. They were going to let the audience in soon.

“Are you sure you want to stay in the crowd?” Noah asked, reluctant.

I nodded reassuringly, “of course! I gotta get the bad omen experience.” I couldn’t help but laugh. Nick joined us, placing an arm across my shoulders.

“But- how else is he supposed to get a good luck kiss between songs?” Ruffilo teased as I leaned into him, slapping his chest playfully.

I scoffed, rolling my eyes, “he never needed those before and did just fine.”

Noah gave me a cheeky grin, “ok but now that I can have a good luck kiss, it’s gotta be a ritual now.”

I shook my head, smiling at him, “Whatever, I’m going to go get my fangirl on.”

I turned into Nick, squeezing him, “break a leg, but not literally,” I said.

“I’ll try not to or will I-“ he laughed, before turning to head to Folio and Jolly.

“I’ll let security know to keep an extra close eye on you, I don’t want you getting hurt- especially if a wall of death breaks out.” Noah said cautiously, “And I want you to be against the bar the entire time, and make sure to stay centred so I can keep an eye on you, ok?”

I tilted my head to the side, giving him a ‘really’ look.

“Noah,” I grabbed his t-shirt by the collar, standing on my tiptoes as I pulled him close to me, noses inches apart. Noah’s breathing quickened, his lips parting gently as his eyes trailed between my mouth and eyes rapidly.

“I’ll be okay,” I whispered, closing the gap between our lips, and kissing him hard. Our mouths moved together, Noah wrapping his arms around me, folding into each other.

I pulled away, Noah following reluctantly, moaning in protest.

“Good luck,” I said, giving him a reassuring smile.

Noah kissed me again quickly, before letting me pull away. As I turned to follow security, he grabbed my wrist, holding me for a moment, his eyes darkening. I watched him confused, before the sentence left his lips.

“Don’t forget what I said, you better be backstage by the time Dethrone is finished.”

A flash of heat washed throughout my body as I nodded, and Noah smiled. “Good. See you soon princess.”

Noah walked away, turning back once to give me a brief wink, and I flushed, following security towards the stage. I hopped down, standing right against the barricade.

Within fifteen minutes the venue started filling, the string of fans running towards the front, some even beginning to push into my back. I held onto the bar firmly, not letting myself be shoved to leave the spot. I shared eye contact with a security guard and I nodded, reassuring him I was okay.

About an hour went by, and eventually, the lights went dark, and the fans erupted into a roar.

I too began screaming, the adrenaline of excitement coursing through my veins. Seconds later the stage lit up with a visual, a video beginning to play. Noah, lying on a mattress with an initiation mask began speaking:

Why do you care about these people?

They don’t care about you- none of them?

They don’t even know you- because you haven’t shown them.

Black and white visuals flashed on the screen, and my heart raced with excitement.

Every day, you’ll wake up, and there’ll be less of you.

You live your life for them,

and they don’t even see you.

You don’t even see yourself.

Jolly walked out on stage, still completely dark, but the guitar riff to artificial suicide began.

Can you hear me through the white noise?

Fans screamed, bodies pushing against me in excitement, waiting for the brunette god to walk onto the stage.

The bass dropped, Folio’s drum beat taking over Jolly’s riff, as Ruffilo walked across the stage, masked, bass pumping through my ears. Fans howled again.

“Can you hear me you sick fucks?”

The crowd went feral.

Noah strutted into the stage, the embodiment of confidence and poise, swinging his arms before stopping mid-stage, gazing over the crowd, a hand covering his chest in appreciation for the turnout. His face was covered, only his eyes and mouth barely visible, as a black jacket and hood covered his body- it was almost a shame he was so modest, but I knew that in a few songs, he would strip, leaving himself exposed in that tight, black, vest top me and every other Noah fan admired.

“Can you hear me through the white noise!” He screamed into the mic, raising it in the air as smoke filled the venue, and I hollered in awe, yelling for my boys.

“Soaked in the neon glows

Silver-forked tongues talking to you in the digital snow

A glitch in the chain, a loop in the brain

You wanted to break, but you still wanna play the game!”

Noah bobbed around the stage, Jolly and Ruffilo head banging and I took it all in. The lights flashing, the smoke, the raging excitement radiating from the crowd- I smiled, eyes brimming with tears. I couldn’t help but feel proud of Noah and Nick, almost in disbelief that this was for them. They’ve grown so much, and it was entirely different getting to be part of the crowd myself compared to watching them online.

I screamed until my lungs felt raw, my throat burning, sweat dripping down my face.

All of this time sitting inside, sitting in the dark

And every night I can see why you could never stop, yeah

Lying is hard, and the truth comes out anyway

You're going way too far, gonna drop dead at this rate

Noah sat in front of me now, singing into his mic, his hair covering his eyes as I watched, completely fascinated.

There's no another way, don't let me go

Don't dig another grave today

I'll make the same mistakes, I'll never know

Who I was before I faded away into the grey

I gazed at Noah as he walked across the stage slowly, singing intentionally with every word, eyes scanning the crowd before he landed on me.

The song finished, and there was a short break, before Noah came back, jacket gone, the only thing remaining a pair of black cargo pants, boots, and that stupid fucking tank top.

The lighting defined Noah’s arms, his tattoos glistened from the sweat, and my heart began to race once again. My mind began to race with a million thoughts, but it kept landing on how good he’d look with his head tilted back as I took him in my mouth- or how much I wanted him to give me everything from behind, hands wrapped around my throat.

“What is up my friends!” Noah boomed, waving his arms, as the crowd yelled.

“We are bad omens and we are so fucking thankful to be here tonight!”

Nick hit the kick peddle of the drum kit in excitement, acknowledging the fans.

“We are gonna play an old song for ya, how does that sound?”

The crowd cheered.

“Who knows if I’m there?”

The crowd screamed again.

There are scars that'll never ever show themselves

You get when you're left alone too long in Hell

They tried to keep in the secrets that you wouldn't tell

But they just stripped you for parts you had to sell

Noah crouched in front of the crowd, reaching his arms out. He followed down the front, until stopping right in front of me. Arm extended, the body of hands around me grabbing onto his arms, but he left his hand open.

Noah sang into the mic, watching my eyes with every move. I stared up at him with a smile breaking out onto my face.

Well, if I'm there to catch you when you fall

You'll have a friend down in Hell after all

And if you're there to catch me when I fall

Then maybe Hell ain't so bad after all

I didn't want to believe how much you needed help

And I just left you to be all by yourself

And now I wish I had seen that you weren't doing well

But I just came back to see how hard you fell

I raised my arm, grabbing onto Noah’s hand, feeling my breath hasten as an immense amount of emotions washed over me. Here I was, being sung to, in front of thousands of people- yet it felt like it was just me and Noah.

His words were for me, and my heart raced, pounding out of my chest as we gazed at each other. He squeezed my hand before letting go, making his way down the rest of the stage.

There was a short intermission, and I felt my phone buzz.

Checking it, I noticed Noah texted.

‘Don’t forget what I said.’

I chuckled, shaking my head as I responded.

‘I’ll be there you dork. You guys sound fucking amazing, you’re killing it.’

Seconds later, Noah responded.

‘Don’t take your eyes off me for this next one.’

My breath hitched in my throat, and the lights dimmed inside the venue again, before the bass began, introducing The Death of Peace of Mind.

My mind began to race again, and as Noah stepped onto the stage, his eyes immediately latched onto me.

I made another mistake, thought I could change

Thought I could make it out

Promises break, need to hear you say

You're gonna keep it now

I miss the way you say my name

The way you bend, the way you break

Your makeup running down your face

The way you touch, the way you taste

When the curtains call the time

Will we both go home alive?

It wasn't hard to realize

Love's the death of peace of mind

You're in the walls that I made with crosses and frames

Hanging upside down

For granted, in vain, I took everything

I ever cared about

Noah never broke eye contact during the entire song. Despite walking across the entire stage, his eyes never left mine- and I refused to let mine leave his.

I miss the way you say my name

The way you bend, the way you break

Your makeup running down your face

The way you fuck, the way you taste

Noah ‘Look at me’ Sebastian let his fingers flow to his lips, taking the shape of a V as he licked between them, the crowd going ballistic. I felt my own stomach begin to churn.

You come and go in waves

Leaving me in your wake

You come and go in waves

Swallowing everything

Are you satisfied?

The crowd screamed again, and once the song finished the introduction to Dethrone began. I motioned over the security, who helped me crawl over the barrier and escorted me away from the crowd. As I headed up the stage and walked behind the curtain, I watched the side view of the performance, the boys thrashing out their last song of the night, all energy put into this song.

Here am I, take me to the pearly gates

So I can look you in the eye when I spit in your face

Here am I, take me to the pearly gates

Don't let 'em hit you on the way out when I take your place

As soon as the song finished they walked off stage, the crowd screaming behind them. All the boys smiled as they passed me, nodding sweatily. Noah on the other hand immediately grabbed me, kissing me firmly.

“Good fucking girl.” He said, smiling as his chest heaved with exhaustion. My face blushed again, especially knowing everyone around us heard his praise.

The crowd was screaming behind us again, and the boys had two minutes to compose themselves before going out to wave and bow. I waited patiently, watching them run out and smile with gratitude at the fans below them, throwing an assortment of picks and guitar sticks.

After a few minutes, the boys came back, and before I could say anything Noah instantly grabbed my wrist, pulling me along with him.

“Where are we going?” I asked, confused, but my insides bubbled with excitement.

“I want you in all the ways you’ll let me have you,” Noah muttered through gritted teeth, sending my heart into a frenzy of nerves. He tugged me through the halls, before finding a door, shoving me into the room.

It appeared to be a smaller version of a green room, the only things inside being a washroom and a couch. Almost like it was placed here just for us.

Locking the door swiftly behind him, Noah led me to the black letter couch sitting down, pulling me onto his lap.

I straddled him, his hands working their way underneath my skirt, gripping at the now-exposed skin.

“You didn’t wear shorts?” Noah moaned, almost instantly hardening at the realization. His tattooed hands ran along the back of my thighs, squeezing periodically, bringing his lips into my neck, biting at the skin gently.

“Do I turn you on that much?” I breathed hastily, closing my eyes, enjoying Noah’s worship over my body. He was fully indulging in me, taking every moment for himself.

“You don’t even fucking know,” he whispered, tugging the shirt off of my body, letting his lips trail across my shoulders, “the only thought I’ve had lately is what it would be like getting to eat you out after performing.”

I smiled at his words, closing my eyes as his lips trailed along my torso, my hips beginning to grind into his. “Are we— are we really going to do this here?”

Noah hummed in response, squeezing me to symbolize a yes.

“Let’s make your thoughts a reality then?” I whispered, and Noah’s eyes leered at me, completely insatiable with hunger.

His hands roamed across my body, and as I rotated on top of him, digging my core into his own, he let out a low groan, body thrusting upwards, slowly.

Noah’s hands pulled away my underwear, leaving me fully exposed underneath my skirt. “God I love the idea of you having nothing on underneath this, such easy access.”

I heard voices passing down the hall, and my head snapped towards the door, chest pounding.

“Th-There are people outside this door—” I said, pushing off Noah slightly, but his inked arms wrapped around me, pulling me back.

“Well, this isn’t about them, is it?” Noah said, chuckling lowly, “Just sit on my fucking face already.” 

Noah stayed sitting, but pushed himself deeper into the couch as I crawled up, allowing myself to be right above him, almost hanging over the couch; his breath left a cooling sensation on my skin, and I shuddered in anticipation.

“Spread your legs for me,” Noah demanded, pulling at my thighs.

“Spread them wider,” he said, and I tried, splitting myself completely for his need.

“Noah, please,” I whimpered, my body soaking for him, yet dreaded not being touched.

“Look at you,” he tskd, letting his long fingers rub along my folds, “coming undone before I’ve even started touching you.” 

“Please,” I whispered ever so lightly, gripping into the back of the couch.

Noah’s fingers danced around my skin for a moment longer before he explored my body, inviting himself into my space and causing my thighs to desire to squeeze shut; but Noah held a firm grip, forcing me against his mouth. His tongue circulated me, before he sucked, moaning against my sensitive skin.

“Jesus Christ, I love the way you taste,” Noah slapped my behind, squeezing so hard I knew there would be a mark. I winced at the impact, but my body began to convulse against his lips as he assaulted me where I needed him most.

“F-Fuck, I don’t think I’m gonna last long if you keep doing that,” I moaned, rolling myself into his skin, trying to create more friction for my need. One of Noah’s hands left my skin, trailing down towards his cargo pants as he freed himself, and began to touch his own body.

“I want you to fuck me so bad Noah,” I cried, pushing into him desperately as I watched him pleasure his own impulse, slim fingers cascading through his heat.

“You’ll get that once we get home.” He said, panting from beneath me, “I want you to come all over my face.”

My mouth hung open as my orgasm built, ears began to ring. I let out a moan way louder than intended, causing Noah to begin to thrust into his hips, his body twitching with complete craving. His breathing quickened and I felt him struggle against me as I cried out, pushing against him one final time as I came undone, and Noah released all over his taped hand, rubbing out his own desire.

I panted, pulling myself off of his face and down into his lap, sitting on his mess.

“Imagine how amazing you’ll sound when I’m fucking you senseless.” Noah’s eyes were closed as he smiled and tilted his head back in satisfaction, out of breath.

After a moment I pulled him into a kiss, and we whispered praises against one another’s lips, which was met with gentle moans. 

“I love getting to know you like this.” He sighed, pulling back to look at me as we heaved together, exhausted.

I smiled at him, pressing my forehead against his own, appreciating what Noah and I had begun to build amongst our friendship.

I kissed him again, softly, my body flushing with heat again, “Will you let me ride you when we get back?”

Noah’s deep October eyes opened with lust, staring me down once again with an immense amount of need. “Only if you moan my name for everyone to hear.”

Oh god help me

[writingstoraes]

begin again 🌷 (split pt. 3)

pairing: charles leclerc/fem!reader

type: instagram imagine, social media au

notes: the long awaited part 3! this took so long only cause i had no idea how i want it to go lol anyway i hope u guys love this one :D lmk what u think!

about: almost a year after your split with charles, fans take a trip down memory lane and wondering why the two of you seemed to have watered things down after soft launching other people months ago. a bunch of rumors also set twt crazy along with speculations at your paddock appearance where you apparently support ferrari.

read: part 1, part 2 (can read on its own, but the parts provide context hehe)

yourusername

liked by isahernaez, lilymhe, landonorris, and 231,298 others

yourusername back at the happiest place on earth ❤️

lilymhe Have fun, love xo

yourbff Looking that good just to watch a race????

tyretactics QUEEN I ALWAYS LOOK FORWARD TO YOU EVERY RACE

charliez1655 miss mam twt is on fire we all miss you 😪

leclercsluv wdym shes almost always at every race ricciardoshooey no they meant w charles lol

yourusername recently added to her instagram story!

Now playing: Charles Leclerc, 2023 Austrian GP, Post-Sprint Shootout Interviews

yourusername

liked by yourbff, lilymhe, carlossainz55, and 210,593 others

yourusername on a wednesday, in a cafe, i watched it begin again

lecslover looking GOOD AS HELL QUEEN

sainzplaylist god shes back to the man shes been soft launching i think i am going to be: sick

1655lecs that might be charles, we don't know 🙏 sainzplaylist yeah i think its time we let that go lol

wagsqueens mam im sorry wym by begin again???

charles_leclerc

liked by pierregasly, finemidnights, carlossainz55, and 982,221 others

charles_leclerc It's nice to have a friend 🌅

tyreexpert u cant tell me thats not y/n 😪 she's his friend after all...

joris__trouche Looking sharp!

lecssainz16 war is over you guys theyre back at it i am in my acceptance stage now

Some months later...

yourusername

liked by charles_leclerc, pierregasly, lilymhe, and 756,293 others

yourusername i am and willl always be your number one fan. words cannot encapsulate how proud i am of you; truly, you deserve all of this and so much more. congratulations, my love ❤️

it's nice to see you running towards me again :)

ps. yes we've been soft-launching each other the past months hahaha

leclercfan AM I DREAMING SOMEONE PINCH ME

livwatchraces i screamed when i saw you guys on the screen!!!

carlossainz55 Aaand they're back 🎉

charles_leclerc Thanks, number one shipper

charles_leclerc

liked by landonorris, maxverstappen, arthurleclerc, and 1,982,384 others

charles_leclerc Sunshine in human form.

A few months ago, I started hanging on to the fact that in good faith and in good time, things will eventually work its way out. Almost a year ago, it seems as if we have closed a chapter but today, we are living proof people who are made for each other can begin again.

Ce sera toujours toi 🤍 It will always be you.

scuderiaferrari We missed you tons, Y/N! ❤️

wagsf1 the queen of all queens is back we love to see it

lecslover it's years later and he still talks about her the same way he always have 🥹

sainzchamp The way theyve been soft launching each other all this time and that one rumor of Charles being with another girl was still Y/N 😭

yourusername sold our apartment already? too bad 😆

charles_leclerc I never actually sold it, if I did, I'd probably buy it back

---------

tagging: @slytherheign, @honethatty12, @siovhanroy, @mehrmonga, @mess-in-side, @leclerc16s, @thelovehypothesis, @dakotali, @aldene-styles

notes: eeee and its finally done! cant believe it took so much time before i finished all three parts lol anyway thank you so much for those who waited for the part three (i see all the asks on my inbox and the comments ehehe) i really just didn't know how i wanted it to go so! i hope you guys love this and lmk what you think <3

[gallawitchxx]

hi beeee!! i hope you're doing okay 💖💖💖

ooohohohoho okay for the kiss thingy: god knows why cuz it sounds potentially very painful but i feel so compelled to request 28 🙏

sweet deanna! i'm hanging in, thanks love! 💖 so you & @lingy910y both requested #28 & i want to fill both of your prompts. but because you were (rightfully) afraid of pain, i gave you one that's a bit strange, but has a promisingly happy ending? you can be the judge! xx

- - - - -

send me a number & i'll write you a smoocheroo 😚

- - - - -

#28: ...as a lie ps. this is inspired by this post about dealer!mickey & insomniac!ian, who have now rotted my brain.

Ian hasn’t slept in days.

It’s happened before—endless energy is one of his tried-and-true symptoms of mania—but this isn’t that. He’s taking his meds, his skin isn’t crawling and his mind is fairly quiet. Quiet enough to frustrate him as he tosses and turns and wonders what the fuck’s going on.

His schedule has been all over the place lately; his normal routine lost to the endless cycles of employment and Gallagher family responsibilities. He’d been hoping to add school to the mix this semester so that he could have other, less hectic options than a rig-riding EMT, but he’d pushed it off. A pity, now that all-nighters are apparently his thing.

Night two, he googles a few things, which is a huge mistake. Who can fall asleep after reading about how even just twenty-four hours without sleep can begin to derail your bodily systems? Sleep deprivation can cause or worsen conditions like Type 2 diabetes, High blood pressure, Stroke, Heart attack—his pulse leaps as his phone clatters to the ground.

Night three, he takes to the streets, running around the Southside until his lungs burn and his knees wobble. As he passes the clinic that gave his seventeen-year-old self a lifetime prescription for antipsychotics, he knows that if this lasts much longer, he should call his doctor. Tell them his nighttime meds aren’t putting him to sleep anymore. Nip this insomnia thing in the bud before it can overthrow the delicate balance he’s worked so hard to maintain.

Night four, desperate and a bit delusion, he pulls up a number he hasn’t used in years, saved under a contact labeled, DO NOT TEXT.

He breaks his own rule: Hey. Still making house calls?

The response is almost immediate: the fuck u care for?

Ian rolls his bloodshot eyes, typing: It’s an emergency.

Three little dots herald a response that makes him laugh: a weed emergency?

He stays strong: Wouldn’t ask if I didn’t need it.

The next text makes his chest clench: u ok?

He decides to keep it vague—I can’t sleep, but it’s not what you think.—and hopes he doesn’t have to explain further and is relieved to read: u want ur usual?

Another clench: Indica

Two texts arrive in rapid succession: what else do u want? can i give u head while u smoke or no?

There it is: the reason Ian doesn’t use this number anymore.

Maybe in another life it would be a blessing to have a weed dealer to lovers arc with your childhood crush, but in this one, it was a curse. A curse that lasted almost a whole year, bringing with it an endless bouquet of blissful fucks and free weed, and a million moments of tenderness Ian knew nobody else was getting out of the guy. A curse that eventually came to collect payment in the form of bloodied knuckles, broken hearts and ego wounds. A curse that still clings to Ian’s psyche, filling his dreams with gentle, tattooed fingers and bright blue eyes and a sweet and savory scent that can only be described as Mickey.

Mickey, now DO NOT TEXT.

On second thought, maybe he should never sleep again.

The knock at the door makes him hard—a Pavlovian response that irks him more than the three sleepless nights he’s suffered so far. Three raps, one right after the other. The last one no more than a brush of his hand.

Ian adjusts himself and answers the door.

Fuck, one look at that smug asshole and he’s immediately right back in it. Lust and like and maybe even a little bit of reckless fucking love fill his body, rising to the surface like sweet cream. A layer of fat on the roof of one’s mouth; a treat to lick later, a reminder that they didn’t end things because they weren’t insanely hot for one another and potentially soulmates. They were just idiots. Stubborn, petty dicks.

Oh Pride, the great slayer of men.

Jesus, he needs to sleep.

“First one’s on the house,” Mickey says as he crosses the threshold, a joint held tightly between C and K.

Hours slip by. They laugh, they smoke. It feels like old times. Ian’s body is loose in a way it hasn’t been in years. It feels good. Like maybe-he-could-sleep-tonight good. And as he melts further into the couch, he starts to get a little horny too. Because Mickey’s yapping on and on about some asshole that frequents the bar he works at, and Ian’s listening, he swears he’s listening, but he’s also staring at Mickey’s mouth like he wants to take Mickey up on that text message and shut him the fuck up with his dick.

Like he wants to taste the stale smoke of his tongue.

Wants him to stay the night.

Forever, maybe.

Mickey finishes his story. His eyes go soft and he drums his fingers against his knee. “Should get outta your hair, Gallagher,” he says. “Letcha sleep.”

That’s the last thing Ian wants.

“Not tired,” he fibs.

Mickey cocks an eyebrow. “You’re not? ’S been days, man. This shit’s gotta be hittin’ ya by now.”

It’s true. It has been days and this shit is hitting him. Or maybe he’s having a sleep-deprivation-induced stroke. He just knows Mickey can’t go.

“Can’t go to sleep without a goodnight kiss.”

Mickey’s already leaning in when he asks, “Then you promise you’ll hit the hay?”

Ian nods as Mickey presses a kiss to his lying lips.

[krembruleed]

alright, the other day i loosely implied that i would make a behind the scenes/tutorial type of thing. momma didn't raise no liar, so here goes nothing i guess!

step 1) rough sketch

honestly i skip this entirely if have a really concrete idea of what i want to do. sometimes compositions are just beamed into my brain from On High and a sketch is unnecessary.

step 2) 3d ref

this is where i refine the composition, lighting, camera angles, props, etc. i use DAZ studio for model posing and blender for almost everything else (props, horns, lighting, rendering).

here's a 10 minute video on how to pose models in DAZ if you're interested in doing something like this! it's not very hard! basic posing requires almost no technical know-how.

i've heard magicposer and virt-a-mate are also good for model posing, but i don't have any experience with either program.

after i'm done posing, i transfer the models to blender so i can work on props, environment, and lighting because doing it in DAZ is ass. you can see that i went overboard on the ref for the paladin i worked on last year by modelling armor.

step 3) lineart

at this stage i'm synthesizing my 3d models, reference images, and style choices into lines.

the 3d likeness of my models is poor because I don't have time for that shit, so this is where my humongous folder full of bg3 screenshots comes into play.

for example: looking at my screenshots, astarion's forehead tilts back towards the back of his skull, much more so than my reference model. his chin and jaw are sharper and longer, and the transition between his brow ridge and nose is almost a straight line. if i combine the information from my 3d model and astarion's face, i get something like this:

3d models aren't fleshy (ie, tummy rolls, wrinkles, muscle deformations, butt squish) unless one puts in A LOT of effort like absolute madman chris jones.

you guys know bernini, right? he has a couple great examples of this. see how hades' hands press in on persephone's leg?

this is what we want to add in the lineart because it's too much effort for 3d. laziness is king.

i guess i draw clothes at this stage too, but for some reason there aren't many in this image. ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

step 4) base color

i have a little color picked palette that i use for everybody so i get their skintones right before i start messing with colored lighting. i'll use overlay and hard/soft light layers clipped to the base layer during the shading step later.

step 5) shading

if you thought we were done with the 3d part, guess again! i posterize my 3d reference so i can see the shapes of the shadows and highlights better. if i'm not feeling it, i can go back to 3d and change the lighting really easily.

could I make a cel shader for this? yes. am I going to? No. custom shaders are for people with intelligence and I am fresh out. posterization it is.

from there, i do a pretty standard cel shading deal that i usually blur and set to low opacity. (for this image i stuck to no blur because i had been looking at a lot of morebird's art and was really feeling the hard edges)

photoshop is what i use for final rendering because it has bangin tools. the brush customization alone make ps worth it, but i also particularly abuse puppet warp, noise generation, the camera raw filter, and layer styles.

step 6) background

i put the least effort possible into a background and then i blur it into oblivion so you can't fathom the depths of my ineptitude.

and then i have a finished image! ᕕ( ᐛ )ᕗ

[soaringthroughthegalaxy]

Wash Away the Pain #2 - Hunter

Fleeing Kamino, Hunter knows they’ve made a mistake, but he isn’t sure how to fix it. Could they even fix it? Who knows. All he does know is that he’s way out of his depth.

Pairing: Hunter x gn!reader (can be seen as platonic or romantic)

Word count: 1.5k

Warnings: whump, guilt, hurt and comfort, brief mention of order 66, hopeful ending.

A/N: I was heavily inspired by these gorgeous drawings by @thattoothpick.

This is part of a mini-series where each of our boys will get their sad/angsty shower time, but they can be read as standalone's.

Check out others in the series: Echo, Tech, Wrecker, and Crosshair.

ps; don't care what's canon or not, the Marauder has a fresher 😂

Sign up to be tagged in my future fics.

It’s late, but Hunter can’t sleep.

How did things go so sideways?

They never leave their own behind, and yet…

He sighs, head thunking back against the shower wall. There wasn’t much room in the small fresher on the Marauder, but it was the only space he could be alone with his thoughts. Guilt churns in his gut. What the hell had happened to his baby brother? Why had he fired at them?

Crosshair’s demeanour had changed ever since the order on Kaller. His brother would’ve never fired on a child in the past; he would’ve listened – albeit with a snarky comment – when told to stand down. It was as if Crosshair had been replaced by someone else.

But rather than getting to the bottom of it, they’d left him.

He’d left him.

So much for being a good leader. A good brother.

The quiet click of the fresher door doesn’t even register to Hunter as his thoughts spiral, clutching the bandana wrapped around his fist.

The touch of your hand on his tattooed cheek rips him from his thoughts, head tipping forward to look at you standing before him under the shower spray.

You’d heard Hunter get up and had heard him head to the fresher and turn on the shower. Tech, Wrecker, and Omega remain asleep. Echo is on watch as you travel through hyperspace. As the squads nat-born medic, called in because of the inability of your boys to get along with regs, it was your job to look after their wellbeing. And now it felt like Hunter needed some care.

“Hey, H.” You greet him softly once he looks at you. Living in such close quarters had desensitised you to nudity – you’d seen all the boys in varying states of undress over the years and had even ripped blacks from them when they’d been injured to give you more room to work.

Hunter doesn’t bless you with any words, just a tiny nod of his head in acknowledgement. He doesn’t need to say anything for you to understand what’s going on in his head.

“It’s not your fault.” You whisper, fingers smoothing down his face and neck, pushing back wet strands of dark hair plastered to his skin until your palm presses against his chest. 

Hunter’s gaze lingers on yours, searching for reassurance that you may hold the answers he desperately seeks. The steam from the shower swirls around both of you.

“I should’ve done something,” Hunter mutters, his voice a low rasp. The guilt in his eyes mirrors the storm within him. “I left him behind. Left my own brother.”

Your fingers smooth over his collarbone, a gesture of comfort. “You did what you had to do to protect the rest of us. Crosshair wasn’t himself. You couldn’t have predicted it.”

Hunter’s jaw tightens, and his gaze drops to the swirling water pooling at his feet. The Marauder’s constant hum provides a backdrop to the heavy silence between you.

“He’s my responsibility,” Hunter admits, a raw vulnerability in his voice. “I should’ve found a way to save him.”

Your fingers tilt his chin, forcing him to meet your gaze again. “Hunter, you’re only human. You can’t control the choices others make. All you can do is protect the ones who are still here.”

He closes his eyes briefly as if trying to shut out the haunting images that plague his mind.

“You’re not alone in this, H.” You assure him. “We’re a team, and we’ll figure this out together. Whatever happened to Crosshair, we’ll find a way to bring him back.”

Hunter’s shoulders relax, if only slightly, under the weight of your words. The subtle touch of your fingers against his chest feels like an anchor, grounding him in the present moment.

A mixture of gratitude and anguish plays across Hunter’s features. He opens his mouth to respond, but no words come out. Instead, he steps forward, his wet skin meeting your soaked clothes as the shower’s spray cascades around you both.

Without a word, you wrap your arms around him, pulling him into a gentle embrace. A hand cups the back of your head, the other around your waist, holding you close. The water from the shower mingles with the tears that escape his closed eyes. You hold him, offering solace in the only way you know how. Hunter’s breath steadies as he clings to the lifeline of human connection.

As the minutes pass, the weight on Hunter’s shoulders seems to ease. The guilt doesn’t vanish entirely, but it becomes a shared burden. You pull back slightly, holding him at arm’s length. Your eyes lock onto his. “We’ll find him, Hunter.” You affirm, your voice unwavering. “Whatever changed him, we’ll get to the bottom of it. And if there’s a way to bring him back, we’ll find that too.”

Hunter’s expression softens, a mixture of gratitude and determination replacing the turmoil. He nods a silent agreement that resonates through the small fresher. The two of you stand there for a moment longer, the steady hum of the Marauder and the pattering of the shower the only sounds in the room.

You reach for his hand, unfurling the bandana wrapped around it. Quietly, you wrap one end around your hand, too. “We’re with you, Hunter. No matter what.”

Hunter’s grip tightens on his end of the bandana, the physical connection serving as a tangible reminder of the support he has. “What do we do about the kid?” He asks softly, thrown so far out of his element.

You shrug, not having thought that far ahead. “We figure that out, too. You said it yourself: she’s one of us.”

“Never raised a kid before.” Hunter murmurs, brows drawing down into a frown. He could remember himself and his brothers at Omega’s age, but that was his only reference point.

A soft laugh leaves you, echoing in the fresher. “And you think I have?” You tease, delight flaring in your chest as Hunter’s lips pull up slightly into a smile. That was more like it.

Silence lingers between you both again, comfortable as always, but you watch as Hunter’s eyes glaze over a little. “He’ll think we abandoned him in favour of her.” He swallows, jaw clenching as the earlier guilt rears its head again.

“Perhaps, but we know that’s not the case.” You reassure him, hand shifting from his chest to smooth across his bicep, across the dark ink that shades it. “We were kitting up to go and find him, to break him out of wherever he’d been taken.”

Hunter knows you’re right, but pushing away his thoughts is hard. “Should’ve stunned him. Should’ve…”

“Hey. We’re not falling down that ash-rabbit hole, okay?” Your voice is more assertive this time, though still laced with care. “There’s a lot of ‘should’ve’ in life, but if that’s all we focus on, then we miss out on the here and now and forget to look to the future. What’s done is done, how we survive this…takeover…of the Empire, and how we get him back are all matters.” You insist, both hands rising to cup Hunter’s face to draw his focus to you.

It works. Hunter’s eyes find yours as he leans into the comfort you willingly give him. “Think we’ll survive?”

“I’ve spent three years with you. I’ve seen you guys pull off the impossible before.” You point out.

Hunter’s lips quirked into a half-smile, a glimmer of hope breaking through the clouds of doubt that had shrouded him. “Yeah, well, we have the best medic in the galaxy on our side.”

You playfully roll your eyes at his attempt to lighten the mood, but it does its job. “Flattery won’t get you out of the next round of physicals, Sergeant.”

He chuckles, the sound a welcome reprieve from the heavy atmosphere that had lingered moments before. “Wouldn’t dream of it.”

“Let’s get some rest.” You suggest, the exhaustion evident in both of your eyes. “We’ll face whatever comes next with clear heads and a plan.”

With a nod, Hunter switches off the shower, and the two of you step out to towel off, changing into clean blacks stored in the only locker in the room. As you return to the racks, you glimpse Omega, still curled on her makeshift bed. She stirs slightly but settles quickly. Hunter places a hand on your shoulder, a silent expression of gratitude.

As you settle into your bunk, you glance at Hunter, resting in his bed across from you. His eyes meet yours, and an unspoken promise is made in that shared gaze. The journey may be arduous and treacherous, but together, as a family, you will face it all. The Marauder hurtles through the star-studded void, a small vessel carrying the hopes and dreams of those who refuse to be crushed by the weight of a galaxy in turmoil.

Tag list: @clonethirstingisreal @littlemissmanga @starrylothcat @cw80831 @dreamie411 @issa-me-bry-blog

[packsvlog]

Hey there lovely! I hope your weekend is going very well 🥰

I love your blog, I was wondering if I could also have a matchmake please?

- as for appearance, I am short (about 5’1”) and on the plus size side (🙈) and I pretty much hate that about myself lol

- i live for making people happy. That’s what gives my life a purpose

- I smile a lot, not because i am that happy but i believe that it can brighten someone’s day if I greet them with a smile

- i am huge on kindness. I don’t see it as a weakness, I think the world is desperately in need of kindness so I’m trying to fill that role

- I am a team leader but big on considering the human factor in all decisions

- I’ve been struggling with depression for over 2 years but I worked very hard to get out of it 💪

- I am an introvert but I get to be the goofiest extrovert once I am comfortable around someone

- I love to crochet and make anime sketches

- i am absolutely addicted to pancakes

- and Nutella

- i hate summer and i LOVE autumn and winter and cold weather

- I have a master’s in psychology

I hope i was not too boring with all these facts, again I love your blog 🥰🥰🥰

hello, angel! you seem such a nice person, i hope your kindness always stay present and you may heal of your depression, just as me, reach if you ever need anyone to talk! 🤍 ps: sorry for only one pairing, i’ll be doing this from time to time unless i get confused on pairings — i have other works to post and the matchmakings are for fun, hope u guys understand.

✶ 𝐩𝐚𝐢𝐫𝐢𝐧𝐠: kamo choso

Despite all the negative weight of the world, you still have hope, something Choso learned when he first was introduced to you. He knew, in that moment of first seeing your smile, he would be a hopelessly mess by your side, in the positive way.

Choso may not look like it, but he shares the same ideals as you. Not for the whole world, but for those he care the most, their happiness is his goals to achieve — your name is inked with hearts on the top of his priority list.

So, Choso first catch you staring down at yourself, your body, and it’s not something he can understand. Bodies are unimpressive to him, let’s be real, his brothers weren’t the most normal looking ones and the love he had for them went beyond anything. He doesn’t understand your hate for yourself, specially being you, a gentle happy person. Choso tries to help, in his best naive way, he bluntly tells you how pretty you are everyday. He may seems stoic, is that he much prefers to compliment your soul, but you know he means it all.

Choso wasn’t used to smile much until he became your little shadow, wherever you go, he follows. And if you smile, he smiles at you. But if you leave, his face is back to a neutral one or with a scowl. He is adorable. Sometimes, though, if his mind is elsewhere, he is by your side with an angry resting face and your happy self talking with someone, is quite a scene to be presented.

You love to speak of the goods of the world to him, and he loves to listen to it. He believes in your capability to change it all for the better, it rubs to him and he catches himself being gentle to strangers, helping the ones who are in need — he always runs back to you telling what he did, like a puppy waiting for praises, and you better grant him.

Choso first learned of your depression just months after you started to date, you had to explain very detailed what it’s like for him, and it broke his heart into multiple pieces — how could someone good and pure have a burden like that? He helps, as best as he can, as far as you let him go, what Choso wants its to be your safe harbor, the lightning house in the middle of your storms and waves. If you allow him, is not something you would regret.

You both are the introverted couple, sitting by the side, in your own world and conversations. Yuuji is your extroverted adopted child, basically. He adores you, he is the one to order your food when the three of you go out, just happy to be with you guys. Adorable.

There are many coins in the prospects of having a boyfriend who just sprouted of nowhere — you can gift him anything and it will be his first time having that, or you can have him tasting your favorites, again, for the first time.

You present Choso with an immense amount of crotchets of large jumpers in pastel colors and scarfs big enough for him to hide his mouth, an habit of his you find adorable. He wears whatever you give him, so cute this broad large male with an angry face wearing a pink sweater with proud.

That’s the best way to describe Choso, he is proud of you to an extent you have barely an idea of how big it is, his love for you reach beyond this world, and yours as well. How odd it seems, one could say, that a half curse could repent and be in love with a blessing.

────〃✿ FUN FACTS.

◛ ₊· Choso was introduced to pancakes and nutella by you, he does not have a sweet tooth, but he likes to eat it because it’s your favorite. Every time he senses your depression is growing stronger, he makes pancakes stuffed with nutella for you.

◛ ₊· When you told him of you psychology masters he was intrigued, and as soon as you explained he asked if he could do the same — you both are now making the preparations for his documents so he can start college soon (all payed by Gojo, of course).

◛ ₊· Choso likes to stare at you. Just stare, blank face, mouth shut. At first it scared you, until you noticed his eyes. He couldn’t mask or hide the love he held in his eyes.

◛ ₊· If you try to do the same and stare at him, he will get flustered.

[habizuh-studios]

me gushing about tgcf for... idek-

Haha, don't ask why i'm making this post when I'm basically dead, BUT- TGCF is honestly was got me into the danmei fandom. Two of my friends were gushing about it so in order to not feel left out i watched the donghua and it was the BEST DECISION OF MY LIFE not only because the donghua was actually so beautifully animated and the story was so captivating, but also because i watched it in dub and got to see howard wang. Which was great, obviously. unfortunately, i spoiled a LOT. And i mean A LOT of stuff after finishing season 1. I spoiled the ghost city arc, the 800 year wait, and some of Xie Lian's trauma before even starting season 2. And i didn't even have to wait that long for it- some people were waiting over 2 years!! which is crazy to me. The character designs are so intricate and beautiful in all mediums, including the audio drama (which is actually my favorite art out of all of 'em), which HOW?!??!?!? ITS AN AUDIO DRAMA?!?!??! i ended up buying all the books, despite spoiling myself a TON. And i don't regret it at all- i even convinced myself (not really myself, but my dead bank account) to buy the special edition of TGCF!! The official art is gorgeous, the pop-up is gorgeous, the books\ mark is gorgeous, and- despite all the spoilers, after i got used to the writing style it was honestly A BLAST. I finished all the books in less than 2 weeks. I stayed up late reading them- and my favorite part was finishing a book so i could jump to the next one. And my greatest surprise was i didn't even spoil ALL of it to myself! The instigator of the war between xianle and yong'an (if ykyk, hint: family) was such a surprise to me i had to put the book down for a good second before reading it again! xie lians occasional sassiness was honestly really in character, but still a surprise. I have seen some who didnt like tgcf because of the character arcs and hualian- which is fine, but as long as you have the right expectations going into the book, you will not be disappointed. Xie Lian is honestly my favorite. Sue me for being basic, but i love him. Even before knowing all the trauma, i loved him. (Followed closely are Ruoye and Feng Xin, so i guess you can guess my type which i immediately attach to, haha) anyway, in case you weren't looking for my life story, then here: watch the donghua of tgcf, then read all the books, no spoilers. Trust me. Spoilers ruined some of the emotional moments for me yet i still felt empathy for all the characters, which is kind of hard to do. (it hurts, dream on, there is no banquet that does not come to an end). then consume the fan content. Literally all of it. We are the most blessed fandom in history. You may look up some things to expect for tgcf, because i believe the theme is actually quite different from mxtx's other works! I still love wwx tho ;) ----- PS: I also love the parallels. I'll talk about one since this post is so long already, but here- I absolutely love the quotes. A lot of times, popular quotes are remembered when Hua Cheng is saying them, but when you read the books, you realize he's just parroting what xie lian has said... im biased and this isnt for everyone, and obviously his tone and context are wayy different + he has great quotes on his own- but I think it shows his love for him. or maybe i just love Xie Lian, haha.

[samandarkilehar]

⚠ Huge rant ahead, you can skip.

I'm afraid of writing this in a diary because of past trauma iykyk.

So I'm about to share a huge part ig..but I'll try to concise it. In 2022 I took a break after graduating and I applied to universities abroad, got into the course I was dying to do, I got into Neuropsychology in Galway, Ireland. I was very excited to study there and experience it. Most of all the course was my DREAM. The process was almost done deposits were paid, I just had to get my loan sanctioned and book my flight. Then it comes to my parents mind that I can't take the loan amount because apparently they're worried about how I will pay it back (umm, get a well paying job after masters maybe. And okay, I wouldn't have it all covered but I was ready to grind and make it possible. Oh, also .. they got sceptical by listening to few of my relatives say Bigad jayegi bahar ka mahol accha nai hota. She will do nakhara when it comes to marriage, see don't let her go that far. Tell her to do it here. And they got influenced to ruin my dreams and my life just because of a worry about my marriage. No, I wasn't 27...28. I was just 22).

Okay. So long story short they didn't listen to me and told me to just try for any Indian college and I said I wanted only the top ones, so I took another year off and prepared for national entrance exams for Pharmacy. And, I was ziddi enough to try again for abroad universities with a hope to get at least a partial scholarship (I tried my best, but I didn't get any so I had to give up again. Maybe I'll do it for a PhD) I got into all the colleges I applied to tho and a scholarship worth 25% at Strathclyde too but hey, it wasn't enough for them lol.

Now, I got my NIPER result yesterday (rank, 3k something) but the problem is that it has very limited seats and few branches. So the possibility of me getting any branch is very less, maybe if in the last phase of counseling there are any seats left, I'll be given that and no guarantee I'll get the department I want. Plus you can only get in if you qualify for the National Entrance (Results aren't out but I did blunders in that exam because I was anxious so I'm doubtful). Now without a top ranking in The national entrance exam I can't get the top government colleges. Nor will I get a stipend, which I think would have been helpful in convincing them to send me to the college I get here in India.

I wasn't stupid so I applied for a few top private colleges too just in case and I got into it but the fee is around 10 lakh for 2 years which my parents now feel is too much ( I already had informed them about it and they said it's okay we'll pay that, abroad will cost thrice as much so we think this is bearable). Now they have a problem with that.

I have an interview for the one last college I applied to on Monday. It's in the top 5 and a really good one too for research. I told them that it costs around 8 lakhs that is if I clear the interview (which I think I will manage to). But they are giving me mixed signals on everything, making me feel struck where I don't wanna be. I'm afraid they'll want me to stay here at this house and go to any masters college in the city. And the major issue is, I don't wanna stay here I'll go crazy and kms. ( No, not kidding. It gets really suffocating at home). I'm now wondering if I should prepare for this interview because what's the point of all my hard work if where I'm gonna end up is the one place I hate to be.

All they wanna do is worry about my marriage, ffs I'm 23, I wanna live, explore and dream. Like why did u make me so overachieving as a kid ? Why did u expect me to always be good at academics ? Why did u let me ruin my childhood for studies? Why do u still have high expectations on me if all you wanna do in the end is want me to go against my dreams? Why aren't you letting me be myself? Why do I feel so caged ? Stop suffocating my dreams and me.

Ps: If anyone reads all this banter till the end... Here are some flowers for you because ik it's a lot.

Also I love them and ik they don't mean harm but I think I'm adult enough to decide my life and they should stop trying to control it. Understand that this is now my life and not something I should do just to please them.

[whalyrae]

DANCE WITH ME CHAPTER 1

“If you want to keep a secret, you must also hide it from yourself.”

Summary : All your life, you thought you were a beta, a simple and boring beta. Until everything change. But now that you've presented yourself as an omega, how will you manage to live and hide it from your six friends and best friend, all alphas and all in the same pack? (a/n : I'm a shit for summary I'm so sorry-)

Genre : soulmate au (of course I'm a bitch for this), omegaverse, bangtan alphas au!, omega reader, fluff, angst, eventual smut, polyamory relationships

Status : In process

Word Count : 2.5K

Warnings : the usual one I guess, like smut, angst, fluff (yeah its a warning for some people ) mention of depression, abusive parents (physically and morally), violence and blood, PTSD, scars, self harm,...

A/N : finally have the courage to post this (again) ! Hope y'all will enjoy it  🥺 this is my first omegaverse fic, I took a lot of points from the omega verse, and modified some of them to my liking hehe  ps : sorry for any mistakes (again yeah), english is not my first language !  💜

Masterlist | ao3 | wattpad

Chapter 2

☾ ☾ ☾ ☾ ☾ ☾ ☾ ☾ 

At first, it was only the two of you. Jimin and you. You were friends since High School and meet each other at the dance club. You always admired Jimin’s dance skills. After months of hesitation, you finally had the courage to ask him for advice. One thing led to another and you became inseparable. You had even taken the dance school entrance exams together. 

You wanted to go to the same one, why not do it together ?

To the world, the answer seemed logical. Jimin was an alpha, You were a beta.

Betas were ordinary and generally reclusive among themselves because of their low chance of breeding with alphas and omegas.

Coming from a wealthy, worldly background, you had therefore spent much of your life being snubbed and demeaned by the alphas or avoided by the omegas. You had noticed that this separation between classes was even more reinforced in the upper class, bordering on the aristocracy, of which you were technically a part.

Your parents had sent you to a public school from an early age, from nursery school to high school. That's where you met Jimin, who had the same mentality as you.

That was all that mattered to him. 

After both of you had been accepted into the same school and knowing that you would have to leave Busan for Seoul, the question of housing came up.

It was natural for you to become roommates. The salary and living costs would be cut in half and you would have someone you could trust near you if you needed it. That was all you needed to make the decision.

Your parents had been reluctant at first, but as their youngest daughter was a simple beta from an alpha family, the treatment you had received in your life from your parents had always been more careless than your siblings. So you didn't have much difficulty persuading them. 

You had a new life ahead of you. Away from your families, accepted in the school of your dreams, the most prized and reputed in the country, to be able to learn and practice your passion as much as you wanted.

And that's during the holidays before you started dance school that Jimin met Taehyung, also an alpha. 

When you met Jimin again a few weeks before they started school and moved into your apartment, Taehyung introduced himself. He was the same age as Jimin and you and worked at a florist. It was love at first sight.

You noticed right away that they were made for each other. And before you met the others, you were even sure that they were soul mates.

Soon, classes started and you found yourselves in the same group where you met Jungkook and Hoseok.

Jungkook was two years younger than you and had managed to get into the school on a scholarship. A young prodigy like you rarely see.

Hoseok was probably the most talented dancer you and Jimin have ever met. He was a year older, but had spent a year in the United States perfecting his skills before entering this school.

Jimin, Jungkook and Hoseok quickly became friends. You took longer, being more reserved than your best friend. And then as a beta, you had always had trouble with alphas, because of your experiences with some of them. 

But Jimin had quickly changed your mind about them. A lot of the students here didn't come from posh backgrounds like you, the mentality was different. 

Well, unfortunately, it wasn't true for everyone.

There was that day when two second-year alphas decided to torment you. They said that as a beta like you, you didn't belong in such a prestigious school, which was completely wrong. 

Status was of little importance here, only talent. These guys were pretty well known among the first years. They were always bullying the betas and sometimes even the omegas.

Jungkook and Hoseok had intervened. They happened to be walking through the corridors when they heard the two students and recognized you. They intervened and defended you. 

That day you knew that once again Jimin had been right and that he was rarely wrong about people. 

It was on that day that you really became friends with them.

Yeah, Jimin was right. Not all alphas were like these two guys, or the guys in their high school, or your family.

Being the only beta in a family of alphas was not easy. When you didn't show any signs of being an alpha, your family became colder and more distant than they normally were. Coming from an upper class, it was out of the question for your parents to show that their daughter was just a beta, an ordinary person.

You kept asking yourself why you still went home several weekends a month. You couldn't count the number of times you returned to the shared flat on Sunday nights in a pitiful state. Jimin and Taehyung had stopped counting the number of times they had found you crying, sometimes even with minor injuries on your face. But you couldn't afford to cut ties with your family just yet, you couldn't afford it. You were going to live in this hell for some time yet, until you could fully emancipate yourself.

Or until they were the ones to throw you out.

There was still one thing you couldn't stand about alphas. Their auras. They all had this overpowering aura about them that weighed on you. Even more with your housemates. You knew they couldn't help it, they were like that. 

You had always believed that it was unique to alphas, that every beta and every omega felt that way.

It wasn't the case, but you didn't know that yet.

Jimin aura had never bothered you, on the contrary, you had always found it soothing and comforting. Perhaps because you had always had this fusional relationship with each other and because you had known each other for so long. As for Taehyung, Jungkook and Hoseok, let's just say that you got used to them over time. 

Unlike the other alphas you were around, they did not seek any kind of domination over you, conscious or unconscious. They considered you, and every other beta and omega, as their equals. 

A few months after school started, Taehyung had moved into your apartment. Anyway, he was still there. Things had happened naturally to a point where neither Jimin nor even you realized it. And that hadn't bothered you. 

Their neighbors, an old lady, had also moved out. It didn't even take a month for new neighbors to move in. There were three.

When they had come to introduce themselves, Yebin had to use all the force in the world not to laugh at the situation.

Three more alphas.

Kim Namjoon, Min Yoongi et Kim Seokjin.

The first one ran a library. He was without doubt the most impressive alpha you had met so far. He didn't need to speak to earn his respect. But he was still a lovely person... and very clumsy.

Yoongi and Seokjin worked together. Seokjin ran a rather famous café in town while Yoongi was the pastry chef.

Unlike Seokjin, who, with Hoseok, was probably one of the most adorable and caring people on earth, you had some difficulty in sympathizing with Yoongi. It was true that despite his size, this guy was very intimidating. Cold on the outside, you quickly learned that a very warm personality was hiding behind him.

In the meantime and for the sake of convenience, as the dance school was close to the building, Jungkook and Hoseok had moved into the apartment above yours.

Something strange had happened between those seven boys. You quickly felt that a certain chemistry had developed between them. You could never explain why. Every weekend, when you came home, you felt that they were all getting closer and closer. You didn't have to be an Alpha or an Omega to feel it.

It was like they have always known each others. 

Weeks passed, the bonding continued, and what had to happen, happened.

You didn't know when they became a pack, but it happened.

Honestly, you didn't see it coming. Taehyung and Jimin were already a couple after all. But later you learned that Namjoon, Seokjin and Yoongi were one, too, long before they became your neighbors.

You didn't really understand, and you didn't try to understand. It was an alpha thing. As a beta, you were part of the normal people, you didn't care about all that. In fact, you didn't mind it at all. Whether they were a couple of two, three or even seven, as long as no one suffered and they were happy, especially Jimin because he was your best friend, that was all that mattered to you.

But the question had been: did you still belong in that apartment, with them ? Surrounded by all those alphas connected to each other ?

One Friday evening, before leaving for the weekend, you asked them. They were all together in their living room.

They were all surprised, as if what you had just asked them was the most absurd thing they had ever heard.

“Why would you leave?” asked Hoseok.

“That's right, we don't want you to go ! I don't want you to go !” Jimin was quick to embrace you, his head resting on your shoulder, “aren't you happy here?”

“Yes, I am! Of course Chim, it's not that, it's just that- ”

“Because we're an alpha pack, and you're a beta?” Namjoon had finally stood up and approached you, “this is bullshit, you're our friend, y/n. You're one of us and you're a beta. You're one of us and you belong here, as much as any of us. If we've made you feel uncomfortable about something, I'm sorry.”

“But you don't have to leave!” Jungkook clung to your arm, his doe eyes meeting yours, “we like having you with us, don't go Noona, please!”

You had sighed, before smiling.

“I'm the one who's sorry, I thought that since you're... a pack you know, my presence might interfere and I don't want to…”

“You're not interfering with anything, don't worry.” Namjoon ruffled your hair, as you saw the others nodding at his words.

Namjoon was sort of the leader of the pack. Even with you, he would always have the last word. You trusted him. You nodded in turn, and kissed Jungkook's cheek before reaching for your bag.

“So forget what I said, okay? Ah, you're going to have your ruts soon by the way, right?”

These seven were so fusional they'd managed to get them at the same time, well, that's what they were saying, you couldn't make any sense of it anyway.

“Let me know when it's over,” you'd pointed your phone before putting it in your pocket, “it's not that I don't want to be smothered in your alpha pheromones and... hear you guys doing whatever it is you're doing to relieve yourself but... I really don't.”

Your ironic tone and grimace made them laugh. You gave Jimin a final hug and greeted the other alphas before leaving the apartment.

Mating season, yes. You were a beta, you had nothing to do with it. You should have stayed with your parents. The house they lived in was big enough for you to avoid them and your brother and sister. You would stay in her room, work on new choreographies, you had even taken with you some books that Namjoon had recommended. In short, you had plenty to do.

You were just a beta. What could go wrong ?

The night at your family's house, while you were lying in your king-size bed, the first heat wave took possession of your body. It was not the first one you had felt in your life, although this one was more violent than the others. But soon a second, more intense heat wave came, then a third, and a fourth. 

When you had wanted to move and the simple friction of your (surprisingly wet) thighs between them made you moan... when the only thought that crossed your mind was that you needed something inside you, now. 

Something big. 

Something that could fill you up. 

With your eyes closed, you had had a vision of a certain person, someone you knew all too well, leaning over you, his gaze piercing your being. 

Jimin. 

At that moment you felt that something was wrong.

Betas weren't supposed to be in heat. You knew that. You'd learned that in class. Yet your symptoms... no. That couldn't be it. You didn't want to believe it.

You had no choice but to call your mother. First, she gave you some suppressants to calm you down. She then calmly explained that there was nothing much to say or do.

It was rather exceptional, but it could happen in rare cases that the first heat of an omega could be triggered very late, when an omega denied being one or when it was submitted to a strong pressure or a very big stress. This was logical for you because of the family you had lived with all your life and the constant pressure they put on you. 

You realized then that you were not a beta at all, as you, and everyone else for that matter, had thought.

On the top of that, your mother urged you to come to their house less often when the season ended. You had never seen so lacking in love and compassion in someone's eyes. The pain of this new rejection was made worse by the fact that it came, once again, from your own mother.

Were you really that disgusting now that you turned out to be an omega?

You suddenly thought of the boys. Of course, you were thinking about them, how could you not ? Since the beginning of your... heat, Jimin wasn't the only one who invaded your mind in visions... anything but innocent. 

Panic suddenly surged through you. 

Shit. You were an omega. 

An omega who lived with alphas. 

An omega surrounded by alphas. 

Alphas who thought you were just a beta. 

How would they react when they found out?

Probably like your mum. They'd end up rejecting you, too. They would be upset at you for not telling them. They would act differently and end up hating you too. You couldn't bear the thought of them looking like your mother, of Jimin rejecting you too. The thought of that hurt even more than the damn heat.

No, you couldn't tell them.

It was simple. You had to make sure you continued to act like a beta.

For your next heat, you would just improvise.

Yes, it was simple, wasn't it? What could go wrong?

It wasn't like you were thinking of them as alphas. Absolutely not.

Seven alphas were waiting for you at home...

Lying in your bed, you curled up on yourself. You were sure they could fill you up perfectly, each in their own way.

You squeezed your thighs and caught your hand between them, which made you moan again. 

"Fuck..."

Yeah, maybe you were in trouble.