#my parents threatened to put a hazard sign on my bedroom door at his age

[dyrewrites]

I'm going to be gross for a minute, for anyone who isn't fond of reading about our disgusting human bodies and the smells we produce while we're growing into them...maybe stop here.

Puberty stinks. It just does. There's this common misconception that it's teenage boys who stink...but no. I'm sorry, ladies, you reeked then too. You were just conditioned to wear nice smells to cover it up (also a problem, but I am being sexist right now so you're stuck with the boy side of this).

Boys aren't. In fact, more often than not they are mocked for wearing cologne or body spray or using lotion at that age. They're not even marketed to for it until they're of 'dating age', even then it's to make women happy to be around them.

It's never for them (this is getting better but it's still shit).

So they get to grow up thinking they're gross because they're boys.

And that is fucked up.

I walk into my son's room and gag and tell him I'm getting him an air freshener and I have to have a discussion about it.

"I'm sorry I'm gross."

"No, no, it's normal. It's not your fault. But it does smell, so I'm getting a thing and you're leaving the windows open tonight."

"It isn't normal, I'm gross and sweaty and I smell, how is that normal?"

"You've got a lot of hormones figuring their shit out right now, it's going to make a mess. Everyone goes through it. If you meet a teenager who smells nice, it's because they're covering it up."

He'll grow out of it, be less sweaty all the time and smell different and maybe find a smell he wants to make his for a while.

As one does.

But being a smelly teenager is totally normal.

I share in case, you know...if there are some of you out there, worried about that. Stop it. You're fine. Find a nice body spray or lotion and smell like that instead if you like. Just know it's not your fault. It's nature.