#my own. ive lived longer than the kid who ran around in princess dresses and had the long whiteblonde hair everyone loved so much

[uranium]

sigh. drafting coming out texts to my parents about my gender which is awkward because they like. know. most people call me jack and use they/them but they dont use it themsselves and ive never asked but honestly every time i go home and get misgendered and have to hear my deadname i start considering putting spoons in my eyes

[dadoroki]

Reminder [3]

Dabi x F!Reader x Hawks

Description: the final chapter to the story ends here. You’re given an ultimatum, having to choose between your painful past and your current present.

[Part 1] [Part 2] [Part 3]

A/N: I can’t believe it’s been about 7-8 months since I wrote part 1. Whoops!

“Not so hard, Keigo.”

You hissed in pain as the man dabbed the cold cloth on your facial injuries. “Not my fault you wanted to play hero and fight all those Nomus yourself.”

If it wasn’t for him, you wouldn’t have been alive. Iv tubes were hooked onto you and the beeping sound of the monitor aggravated you more than the nagging winged-man himself.

“Yeah well someone had to do it.” The sunset highlighted your face and Keigo couldn’t help but fall distracted. The moment was cut short the minute he heard a loud screech coming out of you. While being distracted, Keigo had accidentally pressed deeply into your wound and in return, you punched his arm. “Ow, sorry sorry.”

“Whatever.” You groaned as you laid back down, facing your back towards him. He was about to question your sudden change in attitude but sensed a weird aura around. Getting up from his seat, he headed towards the door in a hurry. “I’ll come by tomorrow alright? There’s something I gotta deal with.” Without looking back at him, you gave a weak wave.

He quietly shut the door to your room but before he could turn the corner, a voice caught him off guard. “So you and Y/N, huh? Never thought she’d go for someone so low.” How did he know your real name? A low chuckle left Hawks’s lips. He turned around and sent a fake smile followed by a wave. “Oh, I’m sorry. Have we met before? Oh right! I sent dozens of my feathers at you. Hope it didn’t kill ya too much!”

Dabi clenched his teeth, roughly pushing himself off the wall. “I’m gonna burn you to pieces you little chicken shit. You hear me?” Hawks playfully held his hands up. “Woah, calm down buddy! But if you’re serious, why don’t we take it somewhere else?”

~~~~~~~~~ ~~~~~~~~~ ~~~~~~~~~ ~~~~~~~~~

And that’s exactly what happened. The two men faced eachother with two different expressions. One held eyes full of rage and anger while the other was smug and laid-back.

“What’s with the face? Makes you look even more uglier than you already are.”

“Shut the hell up.”

Hawks rubbed his chin, observing the man infront of him while thinking deeply. “I still don’t get it. Why do you hate me so much?”

Dabi only scoffed in response. “Enough talking. When I’m done with you, I’ll be sure to give Y/N your burnt chicken wings as a present.”

Hawks didn’t have time to think as blue flames ignited his way. He flew around the abandoned area, the flames following close and burning everything behind him. Now it was his turn to strike. He flew towards Dabi, a long red feather making it’s way into his hand and he striked. Dabi managed to dodge all his attacks with ease, causing the winged hero to flinch. “Huh, you’re so weak. I don’t understand Y/N.”

Hawks ignored his instigation, attempting to hit him at least once but continuously missing all his shots again. “Look at you, you can’t even hit me. Why would she pick a weak man like you? You couldn’t even protect her.”

Emotions ran deep inside Hawks. More specifically guilt? Insecurity? Deep down, he knew everything Dabi said was nothing but the truth. He couldn’t protect you and for that, his worth for you was a newly engraved insecurity. That sadness turned into matched anger, causing him to hold a tighter grip on his feather and putting all force into the swing.

Dabi let out a maniacal laugh, gripping onto the man’s wrist and throwing him onto the ground. He watched unapologetic as Hawks squirmed beneath him in pain. He reached down to his jacket pocket and took out a shiny object, twisting it between his fingers above the injured hero in a taunting manner. “Keigo Takami.”

Once the name reached his ears, he froze in sheer horror. First your name and now his? He slowly realized the shiny object was the promise ring he gave you. “You.” The unstable man continued with poisonous venom leaking from the single word. “It’s all because of you. Y/N no longer cares about me and that’s all because of you! I’ve always despised you Keigo. Even when we were kids.”

Hawks was at a loss for words. He was in disbelief, unable to comprehend the situation. “I’ve always despised you since the day we met. The day I realized my feelings for Y/N. But of course, you just had to be in my way. You were always in my way.” Dabi psychotically laughed, recalling the memories like it was yesterday. “You know, I used to blame Y/N for not knowing how I felt. But I loved her so much and felt stupid for even thinking about blaming her.”

Dabi laid his hand flat on Hawks’s face, watching the man hiss in pain as the light heat made contact to his skin. “And then I started to blame myself. I was the reason why she didn’t love me back. I wasn’t good enough for her.” The heat began to increase, making the hero groan in pain. If the first one didn’t leave a burn mark, this one definitely did. “But then I realized it wasn’t my fault nor was it her’s. It was yours, Keigo. Did you know I was planning on killing you back then? To pretend it was a double accident? I was gonna kill you but then I thought about Y/N. She’d be alone and depressed out of her mind and so I chose to spare your life. Man, was I stupid for that.”

With that, he removed his hand to reveal a complete burn mark along the hero’s left side. He stood up and dusted himself off, facing his hand towards the half concious man lying helplessly on the ground. “You ruined my life Keigo Takami and now, I’m about to end your’s.”

Before Dabi could finish him off once and for all, a pleading voice called out for him in a distance. “Touya, please! Stop it!” The voice was so pure and angelic that Dabi couldn’t help but retrace back to the old days. Back when he was Touya. He slowly let his hand fall, backing away from Hawks.

Dabi was undoubtedly a powerful man. However, no matter how powerful or strong you are, everyone has their own weakness. And for him, it was you.

You limped over as fast as you could, the pain from days prior still taking in effect. “You need to let this go. This was all in the past.”

“The past can come back to haunt you.”

“The Touya I know wouldn’t do that.”

“I’m not Touya.”

“You are to me. You’ll always be Touya.”

That’s all it took for Dabi to be wrapped around your fingers. Those eyes once filled with hatred and rage were replaced with sadness and despair. In that moment, he fell completely vulnerable to you. “Just choose me damnit, Y/N.”

You rose a brow, confused at his words. “I know we have our differences but my feelings for you never changed. You promised me you’d always choose me so why can’t you just do that goddamnit?”

You realized at that point, you were given two critical choices. These two choices would lead to two very different outcomes.

Firstly, there was Touya. He wasn’t the same person he was back then but nonetheless, you still made a promise to him. Plus, it was hard to see him as Dabi when all you saw was Touya. Deep down, you were aware that some feelings were still there for him though you definitely wouldn’t admit it.

Secondly, there was Keigo. You always saw him as a friend but as time went on, it was like the friendship turned out to be a stepping stone for something new. Honestly speaking, you already imagined what it would be like to have a future with him.

The time to choose was now. You deeply sighed, getting ready to reveal your answer.

~~~~~~~~~ ~~~~~~~~~ ~~~~~~~~~ ~~~~~~~~~

You stood infront of the mirror, taking a full look at yourself. Who would’ve thought the day would come for you to finally get married. A long white dress that made you look like a princess, your hair pinned up, and a sparkling veil travelling from the top of your head all the way down to your dress. The final piece was a necklace which you were having trouble putting on.

“You need help?”

Glancing back, you saw that beautiful faint smile to which you returned. The man made his way behind you and took the necklace from your hands. You watched as he clipped the chains together and smiled, matching his gaze through the mirror. “Thank you, Touya.”

“Anything for you.” He admired you from your reflection, eyes travelling all around to every single detail. He never thought he’d see the day where you were like this. All dressed up for the wedding. An uncomfortable silence filled the room and you couldn’t help but clear your throat. “You should get going soon. You shouldn’t even be here and your family came by the way.”

Touya hummed in response and nodded. He made his way towards the door but stopped and faced you. “It’s not too late, Y/N. Just come with me an-”

“No, Touya.” You said abruptly. “I’m not changing my mind. You know I can’t. It’s the right thing to do anyways.” The right thing to do. He sighed in defeat and quietly left your room. The moment you heard the door shut, you deeply exhaled and rubbed the sides of your forehead in stress. You stared at the promise ring Hawks had given you years ago. Today was the day where he would replace that promise ring with a wedding ring, just like he promised.

“Keigo. I choose Keigo.”

That was a sharp pain in Dabi’s chest like he’d been stabbed right there and then. He was expecting some kind of hope, at least just a little bit, to have you say his name. But you didn’t. There wasn’t even any hesitation when you spoke.

“Why? Why him? Am I not good enough for you?!”

You stared at the ground, unable to look the broken man in the eyes. “It’s just how it is, Touya. I don’t make the rules and I can’t choose any differently. I’m sorry.”

Huh, what a joke he thought. When you’re chained to the institution, you have no choice but to submit yourself. That’s exactly what happened to you and because of that, you were now their little puppet to control. Had that not happen, would you have chosen differently? Would you choose to live your life with him and keep that promise?

Hands deeply shoved in his pockets, Dabi walked away from the building and never turned back.

Tags for my peeps that had to wait😂: @trenchcoatdevilsworld @bmthevick @thepplaskingmonthsago

[steebharringt0n]

snapshots of our lives | b.h x you

fears and worries disappear as you and billy hold your baby boy for the first time.

warnings: like one curse word? IT’S JUST PURE FLUFF GUYS.

words: 4k

a/n: ya gurl is baaaack with some extra fluff for the holidays. a certain drawing inspired this one ;) enjoy!

--- The low humming of the heart rate monitor machine quietly echoed in the small hospital room. It was 4 in the morning, three occupants currently sleeping as dawn began to break on the California coast. One was sleeping in a tiny bassinet, wrapped up tightly in a hospital blanket and a small blue cap on his head. 

The other person was resting blissfully on the large hospital bed, their body tired and achy from the past couple of hours, and the final person was curled up on the couch, his blonde curls splayed messily as dark stubble decorated his face. He was aching to sleep in a bed, the couch was too hard for his body, but yet with all the commotion happening within the last couple of hours, sleep was just an afterthought.

Until he finally passed out from exhaustion.

He had been too excited to sleep, too nervous. His life had just done a 180 on him about several hours ago and he didn’t want to miss a single moment of his newborn son’s life.

The epidural had already kicked in, your body was numb from the waist down. Your eyes were anxiously attached to the clock, waiting, counting down the hours till baby boy Hargrove would arrive.

“You’re doing it again” his voice brought you out of the reverie you were in.

You turned your head to face him, a slight smile on his lips as his eyes met yours. He was currently sprawled out on the couch, his legs outstretched. Your hand went to rub your swollen belly, it felt as if it was going to burst if you were pregnant any longer.

“Hmm, I have no idea what you’re talking about” you played it coy, but Billy could read your face from miles away. The perks of being together for almost 4 years.

“You’re watching the clock again”

“Can you blame me? I’m almost 10 centimeters and he’s been moving around like crazy” you grunted as you shifted around in the bed, trying to find a more comfortable position. You heard Billy move around on the couch, you then watched as he grabbed the chair in the corner and pulled it over to your bedside.

He rubbed his large hand over his face, he’d been awake for almost 24 hours, those long shifts at the auto shop were starting to get to him. Your water had broken just as you two were settling down for breakfast, Billy was about ready to head off to work when you felt warm liquid trickle down your legs. 

Your body instantly froze. You dropped your fork on the table, then proceeded to clutch your stomach, your eyes shut in pain as a contraction hit you.

Billy jumped out of the chair, racing over to your side. As soon as he saw the wet stains on your dress he instantly knew.

“Shit, shit, shit, shit. I thought he wasn’t supposed to come till next week?!” he shouted as he ran across the apartment, grabbing your overnight bag and the car seat which had yet to be properly placed in the Camaro.

You breathed heavily through your nose as you waited for another contraction to hit, “He’s a baby Billy not a package! He comes when he - fuck!”

You clenched your teeth together, your nails digging imprints on your palm as a contraction sharply hit you. Billy stopped his movements and jumped over to you, crouching down and taking your hands into his.

“Hey, hey, remember what the doc said, breathe in through your nose and out through your mouth”

You swallowed thickly, nodding your head at his instructions and giving him a watery smile in return. You felt like crying, the overwhelming feeling of the situation suddenly made you feel breathless. There were no instructions when it came to babies, and after today you and Billy were on your own with this tiny person.

You inhaled sharply, you could feel your hands trembling and before you knew it there were tears streaming down your face. Billy reached up, letting go of your hands and gently cupping your face, his thumbs wiping away the tears that were staining your cheeks.

“Hey, it’s okay, it’s okay” he gently consoled. If truth be told, he was just as terrified as you were, but he had to be the strong one in this situation, hell you’re about to have a baby and all he did was cum inside of you.

You shook your head, full on sobbing at this point, “No, no, it’s not okay. We’re barely 20 years old and we’re about to have a baby, and we have no idea what we’re doing and what if we suck at this? What if we're terrible parents and - “

Billy did what he does best to shut you up - he lifted his head up and pressed his lips against yours, kissing you with so much fervor that for a second you almost forgot that your water had just broke. When he pulled away, the look in his eyes was so intense that the fear of having this baby with him suddenly melted away.

“I love you Y/N, and this baby okay?”

He pressed his hand against your stomach, he could feel his son kicking around like crazy. He was more than ready to come out into the world.

“I’m fucking terrified too okay? Ever since the day you told me you were pregnant I - I keep thinking that I’m going to turn out like Neil, or that I’m going to fuck this kid up royally in some way or form.”

“Billy - “

“And I know what you’re going to say, that I’m not going to be like Neil. But when I have those thoughts, I - I just think about what an amazing mother you’re going to be, and how I know you’re going to help keep my ass in line. All my fears about being a dad disappear when I know you’re going to be by my side”

Billy’s emotional confession had you bawling, tears cascading down your face. Billy isn’t good with words, and his emotional outbursts were still a work in progress, but you needed him to be your lifeline right now as you were with him when he was struggling. He grabbed your hand and placed a soft kiss on your knuckles,

“We’re in this together okay?”

You sniffled, bobbing your head up and down, “Okay”

“And no matter what happens I’m going to be here okay?”

“Okay”

“And we need to get you to the hospital, like, now”

Another contraction knocked the wind out of you, your face twisted in agony as shock waves of pain coursed through your body. “Yeah, lets go”

9 hours later you were still sitting at 8 centimeters dilated. The nurses would come and go every 15 minutes to check up on you but with no change all you had to do at this point was play a waiting game. You had even gotten up and walked around the hospital hoping to speed things along, but your effort was fruitless.

Billy took your hand into his, he frowned at all the IVs attached to your wrist, but they were helping keep track of your vitals, and the baby’s. He gently laced his fingers with yours.

“Do you remember our first date?”

You giggled at the memory as your mind wandered back to junior year, “How could I forget? Your Camaro broke down on the way to Benny’s and we ended up making out in your car to Whitesnake’s ‘Is this Love’ until Hopper caught us and ended up towing your car. I’d say that’s a pretty unforgettable first date”

Billy laughed alongside you. Albeit at the time he was feeling embarrassed that he wasn’t able to treat out this cute girl who had been lending him pencils the whole year.

“Do you know what I realized that night?”

Your eyebrow quirked up, “What?”

“That whether I stayed in Hawkins, or moved back to California, that there was never going to be another girl like you”

You stayed quiet as he continued to speak. You could feel his palms get sweaty as he rubbed soft circles over your hand, “You are the only girl I know that could make light of out of my car breaking down. While I was getting angry, you were just laughing. You were happy.” he paused for a second, his blue eyes met yours, warm and inviting. “You didn’t care about fancy dinners or movies or my car breaking down, you just wanted to be with me”

You squeezed his hand, raising it up to your lips and pressing a soft kiss on his fingers. “And four years later, here we are” you smirked, gesturing to your pregnant belly.

A grin spread across his cheeks, “And here we are”

You continued to pepper kisses all over his hand as his eyes never left yours, “I love you Billy.”

He stood quiet as he tried to gather his thoughts. His emotions were at an all time high. You were his girl and you were about to give him the greatest gift he could ask for - a son. The love he felt for you at this moment was insurmountable. He clenched his jaw, trying his hardest not to cry in front of you, but as soon as he blinked, tears welded up. He inhaled shakily, a tiny smile on his face, “And I love you Y/N”

There was a sudden knock at your door. Billy quickly wiped away his tears, as your doctor walked into the room.

“Ms. Y/L/N, let’s hope this baby is ready to come out”

He reached down below to check how many centimeters you were coming along. 

“Is he ready doctor?” you questioned.

“Yep. I’d say you’re about fully effaced. This baby is ready to come out” 

You let out a sigh of relief, squeezing Billy’s hand. You could feel your heart hammering loudly in your chest. The both of you exchanged looks, Billy nodding at you as you held on tight to his hand.

“You may want to go easy on his hand, you may need that for later” The doctor added as he began to call in his nurses.

As soon as the nurses began to gather around your bed, everything started to move quickly.

“Alright Y/N, you’re going to feel a lot of pressure, but when I say push, I want you to push as hard as you can” The doctor ordered. You swallowed heavily, feeling scared and nervous all at once. 

You glanced up at Billy who was standing above you. Sensing all your nerves you placed a chaste kiss on your head, “You got this princess”

He gave your hand a gentle squeeze, and you began to push.

Everything in the world suddenly went mute, and all you could focus on was pushing this baby out of you. You clenched your eyes shut, your jaw locked in tight and you swore that you were bound to break Billy’s hand with how hard you were squeezing it. You let out a loud gasp as you stopped your pushing,

“Good job Y/N! His legs are out! Just one last giant push and you’ll finally be able to meet your baby boy” the doctor kept encouraging. 

Sweat began to drench your body, you looked absolutely exhausted, but to Billy you could have never looked any more beautiful. He leaned down into your ear, “You’re so close baby, he’s almost here”

“B-Billy, it hurts ... I’m so tired ... “ you whimpered to him.

“I know princess, but our baby is almost here. We finally get to meet him” he continued, pressing kisses on the side of your face. You nodded at his words of encouragement, feeling a newfound sense of energy. You clenched his hand once more and you pushed like you’ve never pushed before. You were wailing at the top of your lungs, Billy still chanting supportive words into your ear until you heard the most beautiful scream in the world.

“Here he is! Baby Hargrove!”

The doctor held him up to the light, his little arms flailing around, searching desperately for some warmth. You opened your eyes and a sob escaped your mouth as you watched the nurses quickly whisk him away to the weighing table behind them.

“Baby Hargrove is 7 pounds and 6 ounces. He has all 10 fingers and 10 toes!” the nurse happily exclaimed through his loud cries.

You released Billy’s hand, he leaned down towards you and slammed his lips onto yours - one that was filled with love and passion. As he pulled away, his eyes began to water with tears.

“You did so good, so so good, I’m so proud of you Y/N” he croaked, brushing away your hair from your face. You nodded at him, being unable to find any words to convey this moment.

The nurse then walked over with your baby boy, all bundled up in his blanket. She gently passed him over to you, “Congratulations, he’s a beautiful baby”

Your Y/E/C eyes were wide with wonderment as you stared down at this tiny person. Billy had an incredulous look on his face, he blinked back tears at the sight in front of him. The love of his life with his son. Your fingers gently wiped away his tiny blonde wisps of hair that you sure were going to match Billy’s curls.

“H-Hi little guy ... I’m your mom ...” you whispered to him. “this guy up here is your dad, he’s a little rough around the edges but he’s secretly a big softy” 

Billy choked out a laugh at your words, wiping away his tears as his gaze never left his son.

Your baby boy was still wailing when the nurse handed him over to you, but the instant he heard your voice, he began to settle down. His cries then turned into soft whimpers, you watched as he slowly opened his eyes, taking in his new surroundings. You let a soft chuckle,

“I was right” you commented out loud to Billy.

He raised an eyebrow, “About what?”

“His eyes. They’re just like yours”

You shifted soundlessly in your sleep, turning over so that you were facing the bassinet. With one eye cracked open, you propped yourself up on your arm, careening your neck towards the sleeping baby. You were desperate to hold him, to feel him in your arms. Feeling much more awake you reached in the bassinet and gently, carefully pulled him into your arms. For weighing about 7 pounds he was a heavy little baby. As you positioned him into your arms, you hissed quietly, forgetting that your body was still sore and tired.

Luckily by the time he was comfortably resting in your arms, he was still knocked out. You chuckled to yourself, a heavy sleeper like his father.

You stared at your son in complete awe, still not being able to believe that this little human was half you and half Billy. You had so much love for this tiny little being that you felt like your heart was going to explode.

Your finger traced the outline of his little face, starting with his wrinkly little forehead. Your finger then trailed down to his nose, which you weren’t sure if he had your nose or Billy’s, but one thing you knew for sure, is that he had Billy’s ocean blue eyes. 

Your finger finally stopped at his cheeks, which were adorably chubby and you wished for a second that he would stay this little forever. 

“Hey mama, you’re up”

You twisted your head to face a sleepy Billy, sitting up and stretching his arms. With a soft smile, you patted the empty space on the bed, “Come sit with us, daddy” You wiggled your eyebrows at the innuendo.

Billy laughed, “Ooh, that may need to stop”

He kicked off his shoes and climbed into the bed, wrapping his arm around you as you snuggled into his side. The morning was beginning to creep in, letting in sunlight into the hospital room. You glanced up and met Billy’s warm gaze, you swear in all of your years that the two of you had been together, you had never seen such a look of love, and adoration in his face. 

A soft coo suddenly broke your attention off of Billy. You glanced down into your arms and saw the baby shifting, his little face twisting into a frown.

“S-should we call a nurse?” Billy asked, there was hesitation laced in his tone.

“No, no, I got this”

You slipped down your hospital gown, just enough to expose your breast. Instinctively, the baby began to root towards you, his mouth found his way towards your nipple and he instantly latched. You winced in pain as you shifted around, resting your body onto Billy’s as the baby began to feed.

“Are you okay? I can go get a nurse” Billy quickly began to speak. Seeing you still in pain was concerning to him.

“No, Billy, I’m okay I promise. Everything is just really sore” you paused, brushing your finger down his cheek, “But look, he latched”

A warm smile spread onto Billy’s lips as he watched his son eagerly eat. “He has my appetite that’s for sure”

“We still need to give him a name” you remarked.

Billy studied his son, trying to think of a good name that would match him, “Jacob?” he offered.

You scrunched up your nose, “Nah. What about … Thomas?”

“No way, Tom Hargrove? Sounds like a used car salesman”

You laughed, “Fair enough”

The both of you then became quiet, gazes locked upon the hungry baby, your minds trying to come up with a good name. Then Billy quipped, “What about Adam?”

“Adam” you tried out the name for yourself, testing to see how it sounded like. “Adam William Hargrove?”

As soon as the name came out of your mouth, Adam pulled away from you, letting out a big yawn from his mouth, milk dribbling out of the corners of his mouth. His eyes carefully opened, curious blues shifting from you to Billy.

“I think he likes it” Billy quietly said.

“We’ll let the nurse know when she comes back in, she can add it to his birth certificate”

Billy hummed in agreement, his eyes still not leaving Adam’s as the fussy baby began to shift in your arms.

“Do you want to hold him? I think you may need to burp him” you noted, as you began to unwrap him from his blanket. He was dressed in a white onesie, his little legs and arms began to move around at the drastic temperature change. Billy gently took the crying baby from your arms,

“Shh, it’s okay Adam, dad’s got ya”

Billy carefully balanced Adam’s head in his one hand, and his small body with his other hand. Adam began to quiet down when he realized that he was in Billy’s arms.

With a wide smile on his lips, Billy looked over at you. His blue eyes shined with excitement, “Hey ... he stopped crying”

You rested your chin on Billy’s shoulder, watching as Billy cradled him close to his chest. “Hmm, he knows who his dad is. You did give that big speech to him on how Mötley Crüe is ten times better than Journey”

“And now he has superior music taste, just like his old man” he grinned, winking at you.

Throughout your pregnancy you encouraged Billy to speak to him. He at first thought it was stupid, speaking to a stomach sounded silly. But when you casually mentioned that the baby would start kicking whenever Billy’s voice was heard, he made it his mission to speak to him at least once a week. His head would rest on your belly, his hand splayed out, feeling the soft pitter-patters of his kicks against his palm. You would watch amusingly, brushing his long blonde curls out of his face as he spoke to his son.

You grabbed the white cloth from the small table, placing it on Billy’s shoulder. Billy then adjusted Adam, placing his head onto his shoulder,

“... Do I just pat his back?” he questioned.

You nodded, “Gently”

Billy’s large hand was about the size of Adam’s entire body, which intimated him. He felt so fragile in his arms, he was scared that a single pat on his back would hurt him. But as gentle as he could, his hand found a steady rhythm of pats against his back.

You grinned at Billy, “Look at you, you’re a natural”

The door to your hospital room swung open, and walked in Angela, the nurse who had helped you through your delivery. With a smirk on her face and her arms crossed, she watched as you and Billy figured out how to burp Adam.

“Well I see I’m not needed here much. Did he latch on okay?”

With a swift nod of the head you turned to face Angela, “He’s been doing great. We finally figured out on a name”

“Oh yeah?”

“Adam William Hargrove” you announced to her proudly.

Angela walked over to the white board where the nurses were keeping track of all your vitals. She took a dry erase marker and in large letters she wrote ‘WELCOME ADAM WILLIAM HARGROVE’

“There, now every one will know his name. I’ll be sure to add it to his birth certificate” she closed up the marker cap and walked out of your room.

You turned your attention back to Billy who was still gently patting Adam’s back. After a couple more pats, a small burp escaped out of Adam’s mouth who then proceeded to spit up milk all over the white washcloth. Billy stood frozen, waiting to feel his spit up dribble down his back but you swiftly grabbed the clean end of the washcloth and cleaned up the mess around his mouth,

“He puked didn’t he?” Billy asked uncertainly.  

You giggled, taking away the dirty washcloth from Billy’s shoulder and tossing it on the table. You watched as Adam then proceeded to snuggle onto Billy’s shoulder, nestling his tiny head in between the crook of his neck. Adam let out a whimper, followed by a soft coo as Billy rested his hand on his body. The warmth that radiated off of his hand helped keep Adam warm.

“He’s fine, he just had to show his big ol’ dad who’s running things round here”

You placed a kiss on Adam’s forehead as he settled in Billy’s arms. His little blue eyes started to slowly close as sleep started to take him back in.

“Is he back asleep?”

You hummed out a yes. Billy then carefully shifted his body, laying all the way down so that Adam was laying on his chest. He read that skin-to-skin contact is good for newborns, and he was lucky enough that his shirt was always half-way buttoned, so he took the opportunity to move him just to where his head was resting right above his heart.

You laid back down with your boys, watching them with pure affection. With Billy’s hand still placed on Adam’s back, you interlaced your fingers with Billy, so that the both of you had your hands on Adam’s back, feeling the steady beat of his chest rise and fall with each breath he took.

Within minutes both Billy and Adam were passed out. Your eyes were tired, your body was sore, and your mind was begging you to sleep, but you couldn’t tear your eyes off away from your two favorite boys. 

If heaven was a place on earth, you were sure that this was it. No other moment in your life could ever top this.

Any fears that you had about Adam were gone, had disappeared into thin air. You wanted to laugh at how nervous you were several hours ago at his arrival, but you knew that with Billy by your side that he wouldn’t let you face this alone.

It would be the three of you, now and forever, and you wouldn’t have it any other way.

[kairoskrp]

                                     — On the wicked wings of time, thy kingdom comes

Meet [ Song Jihyo ]

She is a [ thirty-five] year old  [ owner of safer shores ] currently residing in [ skyhall apartments, #605 ]. Visit  and greet  her today!

Personality: 

Song Jihyo is a force of nature. Regal, proud and strong, Jihyo has a strong sense of what is right and what is wrong. She easily feels taken advantage of and will often lash out harshly to make sure people now that’suna-fucking-ceptable.Generally kind-hearted, warm and passionate, she has a strong temper that flares up like a supernova but is also easily pacified. Above all, she is protective and will do anything to keep those she loves safe. She has seen too many things to still care for fear, let alone let it hold her back. Sweet to most, it is a good idea not to get on her bad side.

Spirit: Hippolyta, Queen of the Amazons

Power:

Enhanced condition: The user’s physical and mental abilities are above natural members of their species in that verse, beyond what can be emulated via natural training and with little to no maintaining. This entails that they are faster, stronger, more intelligent and overall superior to fellow members of their species, without being obviously supernatural. (Think Captain America.) Jihyo has no extra mental capacities, though.

porcelain to ivory to steel: Jihyo has an increased resistance to pain and injuries. She is nearly immune to all poison or drugs (to her great dismay this includes caffeine and alcohol). Most people could barely hurt her with a punch, and normal knives while still hurting her will find considerably more resistance on her skin. She can fall from great heights that would kill a normal person, or simply blink as they break a chair over her arm. If normal people’s skill is paper, hers is steel.

even heroes have the right to bleed: even so, Jihyo is not invulnerable. Things like shooting her at point blank will still hurt her. While she may fall from greater height, shoving her out of a plane would still kill her. Giving her a ridiculous amount of drugs will still affect her. To her great dismay, alcohol and caffeine is included in the list, and so are painkillers, so when she does get hurt, it’s usually a slow, painful way to recovery. She heals slightly faster than regular humans, but not considerably so. She is more difficult to harm, but when she gets hurt it usually sucks big time for her. Also while she might be more resistant to actual injury, she is not that much more resistant to pain, meaning that while something might not harm her, it may very well still hurt her.

golden medalist girl: Jihyo is in prime condition, and doesn’t have to train much to maintain it. She is considerably more agile than an olympic gymnast, faster than a sprinter, has the stamina of the world’s greatest marathon runner, stronger than a sumo wrestler, has incredibly fast reflexes, and so on. She has a certain affinity to hand-to-hand and close combat especially.

jack of all trades: due to her all-compassing power, she doesn’t really excel at anything. This means that someone with enhanced strength would still be stronger, or enhanced speed would still be faster. Also, while a lot of complicated moves and human feats may be within her capacity, she still has to actually learn and practice the moves. To maintain her energy she must eat copious amounts of food and she often goes hungry.

my spideysense is tingling: along with her physical condition, her senses are also heightened, meaning she sees, hears, smells, feels and tastes on an increased level. She can smell several layers of scent, see greater distances and during night or through smoke (although she posses no skills like heat vision or the likes, so her vision is ultimately still on a human level.) She also has a heightened awareness of dangers.

hear my heart roar: she can however not stop this skill, much like any other part of her condition. This means that she can get overwhelmed if exposed to too much stimuli as well, which can cause headaches or nausea or send her into a panic attacks. Her danger sense also often translates into a sense of paranoia, where she might consider things far more dangerous than they may be.

Biography:

tw: drugs, violence, murder, implied child abuse, implied rape, prostitution

I.

She is a nameless girl, for all the names she has aren’t really hers. She’s a motherless girl, for all the women that hold her hand aren’t really hers. She is a lifeless girl, for the live she leads isn’t hers at all.

She follows a stranger in the airport and she lets a woman she doesn’t know coo over her. In the morning, her father made her swallow a bag of something white, and a doctor put even more inside. She didn’t cry, because good girls don’t cry. Good girls smile and twirl around in their pink princess dress and don’t throw up before they’re told, no matter what. Good girls help the family.

She is seven, and she knows this.

II.

You’re special, her father told her, his hand on her aching tummy. The bag feels heavy and wrong, but she doesn’t cry. Only you can carry something so valuable inside you.

Something inside her stirs, deep within the hollows of her bones, underneath the cage of her ribs, and she knows that to be true.

III.

If she closes her eyes: golden shores, the waves calm and clear enough to see the vividly coloured fish swim, warm as the water washes over her bare feet. It is a dream, maybe, or a memory lodged in the confines of her veins, a soft thrumming like the humming of a bird’s wings. When she closes her eyes, the world is hers, the sand underneath her feet is hers and she belongs.

When she opens them: the smell of chlorine and car exhaust, she sits quietly like a doll by the poolside of a city she doesn’t know as people talk in a language she doesn’t understand. They have taken what is valuable from within her outside of her and with that, she loses her value. She’s just a girl. Just a kid, forgotten.

Just a vessel.

IV.

No one sees her, until Hayoon does. She will have a name to remember, she will have a legacy. She is beautiful, a mirage in the darkness, starlight eyes with a sunshine smile. They never taught Jihyo love, but she knows that’s what it is, the flutter beat of her heart. They never taught Jihyo love or peace or calm, but she knows that’s what it is.

Hayoon wants to be a dancer. She trains ballet, twirling in the sunlight. She loses her balance and wobbles and Jihyo catches her. Hayoon laughs, but doesn’t try again.

So she grows up like this: playing alone in the corner, pretending the sticks she finds are swords of old, gleaming in the sun. She rages against the sky, besieges the doll castle she got as a gift, conquers a foreign street. Hayoon at her side always, Hayoon twirling in the golden light, Hayoon laughing, Hayoon’s sleepy face smudges against her chest.

Protect, the voice inside her whispers, and Jihyo pulls her closer.

V.

You’re becoming more beautiful every day, they tell Hayoon, and it frightens Jihyo. She knows what that will mean. She is twelve and she understands the ways of the world now. She cannot shield her eyes any longer. Being beautiful means being wanted, and what people want can be sold, but only if the people wanting are important because of their numbers. But Hayoon giggles and she can’t talk.

No one ever asks what she wants. (She wants, more than anything, to go to those golden shores, to hear the birds sing there, to speak in that language that sometime flies through her mind like a fleeting memory, a wisp in the air, a hint of something greater.)

VI.

If she closes her eyes: a white knuckled grip on a kopis, the taste of blood in her mouth but none of it hers, a field of men slewn at her feet as she roars with victory.

If she opens them: Hayoon crying, her eyes swollen shut, blood trickling down her nose. Hayoon screaming they’re going to sell me, they’re going to hurt me. Hayoon crying don’t let them hurt me.

VII.

She is right. They come for her, cursing and forceful. And Hayoon crying don’t let them hurt me, don’t let them hurt me. Hayoon screaming, unnie, save me.

Hayoon screaming don’t let them hurt me, but Jihyo is just a little girl, and she doesn’t want pain either. She is weak and fragile and all alone.

Fight, the voice inside her roars, and Jihyo listens.

VIII.

She is not a girl in a cage, she is not a broken bird. She is a goddess. The blood they have spilled so carelessly is the blood of a queen. Her pulse roars like the rally cry of an army, deafening over her own screams.  In her wake, empires fall. Her eyes have witnessed hundreds of spears gleaming in the sun, coated with blood.

Fight, the voice inside her roars.

She is not fragile. She is unbreakable. She is a tenacious protector, fierce in her wrath.

Fight, the voice inside her roars.

Her anger sparks like a supernova, like a galaxy bursting into life, violent and glorious, a darkness and then the light, her frightened animal heart breaking out of its cage, the golden shores washed by tidal waves.

Fight, the voice inside her roars. I will protect you, the voice inside her promises, and Jihyo is unafraid.

IX.

When the anger subsides and the voice stops roaring, they are all dead at her feet. Hayoon’s eyes are wide and teary-eyed, but when the footsteps sound, she doesn’t hesitate. She takes Jihyo’s hand and pulls her along and together they run into the night.

X.

Life on the street is harder than life in her golden cage, but it is free. She has Hayoon, she has an army of girls just like them, girls who ran into the night with their heads held high, girls with scars and bruises, who fell apart at the seams once, who picked themselves back up. She has Hayoon, she has a stranger’s wallet in her hand. She has a friend and dreams about a woman, strong like a mother, protecting her.

What more could a girl want?

XI.

Of course it is a man who ruins it.

XII.

You are meant for more than this, he says.

This means Hayoon shivering in a corner, this means boys fleeing with broken bones and bruised ribs. This means starving, slowly but surely. This means freezing, slowly but surely. This means living like an animal.

The voice inside her agrees and Jihyo listens.

XIII.

So he teaches her, how to fight, how to destroy. A vessel of another kind. No more deliveries. No more things given, but things taken.

He gives her names.

She makes the names go away.

XIV.

Life is good for a while. They regain another golden palace, Hayoon by her side. No longer a lost girl, but a queen. (And he, her king, in the silent spaces of her mind.)

But Hayoon stops smiling one day. She goes quiet and cold. She doesn’t like it when he comes near her, but she doesn’t tell Jihyo to leave. Jihyo knows, she didn’t like the streets. She didn’t like the fear of it, the uncertainty.

Jihyo knows, Hayoon is too beautiful to suffer like that.

XV.

Months pass and the swelling of Hayoon’s belly can’t be denied anymore. At dinner, Hayoon looks at the table but Jihyo looks at him. He looks away, and Jihyo knows: she should have never trusted a man. No one talks about it, but the truth lies heavy in the air between them, always on the verge of threatening to spill into words.

XVI.

Hayoon doesn’t want to run anymore, so they stay. Her baby girl is healthy, but Hayoon doesn’t smile. Hayoon barely looks. She has his eyes.

A year of silence and Jihyo finds her on the ledge of the apartment building. Hayoon twirls in the golden sunlight of the setting sun and then she is gone.

Then it’s all gone.

XVII.

Fight, the voice inside her roars, but Jihyo is too tired. She knows what fighting means. It means taking more things out of the world.

She doesn’t want anything out of this world. She wants Hayoon in it. She wants Hayoon back. Fight, fight, fight, the voice inside her roars, destroy.

Protect, she tells it. Protect.

XX.

Protect, she tells the voice inside her.

And it answers her. Protect.