#my only goddamn hobby
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cowboy-robooty · 11 months ago
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Will you ever make a discord server or do u have discord in general?
I DO HAVE DISCORD!! its what i usually give people if we end up messaging more than quick DMS ^_^ i wont lie i probably will never make a discord server because ive thought abt it but........ managing everything is so overwhelming and also uh. i dont join a lot of servers let alone talk in the ones im in often but if youve seen me youll know im not exactly. as gus and wiener put it "socialized for humans". im just no good at that stuff and also itd be a pain in the ass because i have people i dont like that i wouldnt want in the server and theyd make it a whole big deal even tho its like dude its a server centered around me trying to make friends and actually now that i say it out loud that sounds pretty concieted 😨 its like im trying to make my own anime harem.... YOU SEE HOW MY MIND RUNS IN CIRCLES?!?!?! but yah i dont think i could manage such a thing i have too many problems with it that i cant even fit it all in my average essay length inbox response... if u wanna be mai friend then check if were mutuals ^_^ because (with VERY few exceptions cuz... sometimes social obligation is strong enough to compell even me) i dont really tend to follow people unless 1) their art/content significantly impresses me and i wanna be their friend bc of that or 2) their posts and personality shown on da blog is insane and i wanna be their friend bc of that. i kinda subscribe to the older culture of only following people if i would be interested in having a connection (facebook friends style). THAT DOESNT MEAN I DONT LIKE YOU IF I DONT FOLLOW YOU!!!! theres a whole lot of people ive seen swimming around wif great shit and i dont follow em just bc i dont have feelings strong enough to do it (i legit only followed back gus like after 7 months of us being friends lol) yah idk....... feel free to dm me but no promises on replying fast or good n all... i desperately want friends but im so unsocialable its insane.... maybe one day ill change my mind but augh just thinking about it stresses me out im trying to make an effort to join moar public servers tho!
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yakultii · 4 months ago
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sometimes you just gotta go outside to realise you’re not as entirely ugly as you feel (you’re just nature)
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mjfass · 6 months ago
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everyone is sick of your shit, just leave tumblr
Omg, no. I still have a lot of people to annoy!
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halfricanloveyou · 2 months ago
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“hey so we’re gonna need you to focus up and pay attention and not talk for 3 hours straight. and no you can’t look at your phone or ask brief questions or think out loud and 98% of what will be said won’t apply to you.”
“also i know you have adhd and that you said your adderall wore off but so do i. you just have to learn.”
do you seriously think i am capable of that. what if i blew you up with a cool wizard beam attack? what if the beam was purple.
#this is NOT a threat aimed at anyone specifically AT ALL#i will not commit violence NOR WILL I CONDONE IT#but honestly i’m so fucking TIRED of being told to ‘just pay attention’ and ‘work harder on focusing’#i have a fucking DISORDER WHERE MY BRAIN DOES NOT FUCKING WORK CORRECTLY#well i have adhd too. everyone does.#okay? what type then? you on adderall? how many jobs did you lose because of it?#how many times have you almost had to deal with legal issues because of it? how many times did you almost fail college because of it?#i’m tired of ableism by people that ‘have adhd too’#you know good and goddamn well we aren’t all the same and severity and symptoms differ from person to person#honestly this is about a hobby that i love doing that i’m now considering quitting#i’m not the only victim to the overall ableism BUT#refusal to accommodate and demanding compliance in a space that’s supposed to be accepting#yeah no. i can’t sit for 4 fucking hours off adderal and do nothing#and it’s like i do do something for a cumulative 1 hour of that time#i am seriously considering quitting and it breaks my heart#adhd#ableism#i don’t want to but i also don’t want to deal with ableism everything i do something non neurotypical that people have decided is#‘distracting’#i’m making quiet comments under my breath not to anyone next to or near me#and i’m not really willing to go through the process of trying to explain this shit to ableists who claim having the same disorder makes#our experiences and disability levels the same#i’ve had to fight this shit my whole life. i do this hobby because it’s fun#it’s not fun if you’re gonna tell me to sit and do nothing for 4 hours and get mad when i stop paying attention#or if i ask questions or talk to myself.#i’m so fucking tired of this shit.#my grown adult ass is now at the point where i do whatever the fuck i want forever#and sitting around for 3 cumulative hours is not what i fucking want to do
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katyspersonal · 2 years ago
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Cannot fall asleep or eat or drink or do anything productive, all I can do is cry and it's been like this for many hours and doesn't seem to stop. What a day, huh.
Tonight I had a short dream where different peoples/characters hearts were represented as small rooms, and I specifically focused on rooms of Maria, G3hrman and Ad3line. All three were terribly dirty, messy, full of trash and broken things and dark, so I redecorated them to be clean, colorful, renewed and pretty with "magic". Filled them with flowers and living butterflies, too. Made the washed up sullied colors vibrant again.
I just wish there was someone who could do something like this for me.
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mishkakagehishka · 2 years ago
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I feel so stupid crying over this but i just feel like the biggest idiot in the world
#i spend all my days studying all my goddamn days since OCTOBER#the closest i got to going out was when i'd go get drinks after lectures EVERY ONCE IN A WHILE#i went out with company ONCE. ONE WEEKEND. O N E#and i really AM the idiot bc it's just me#all my other friends have lives and free time#everyone i know is always out always going somewhere hanging out with someone#everyone i know on here is able to work on their hobbies all year round#the way i work like a fucking mule you'd think i'm studying medicine or something#else that guarantees a well-paid job but no. i'm in fucking language studies.#i work like a mule with all my breaks leaving me so exhausted that all i can do is scroll or just rest#and then i DON'T EVEN PASS????????#AND THEN EVEN MY SUMMER ''BREAK'' WILL BE SPENT STUDYING SOMETHING#I DON'T EVEN UNDERSTAND HOW BETTER I COULD STUDY#AND EVEN THEN I'LL HAVE LIKE SIX GODDAMN WEEKS#and then what? another year starts and once again study all day have no time for myself#and because i'm stupid i'll do this for God knows how long#five years at minimum. but that's if i pass everything on time#i failed this exam but it's not a prerequisite for 3rd term only 4th term subjects#but lit is a prerequisite. if i fail this exam i'm already setting myself back an entire semester#and for what? i'm literally wasting my time#i'll be dead in 60 years if i don't raise a hand against myself sooner#i spent 20 years doing fucking nothing that i wanted to do#even during breaks it was everything my parents expected of me#God#and now i can't even go to sleep bc i'm too busy being a pussy bitch and crying about this#and i have to be up in 7½ hours yayyyyy
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nonbayanary · 1 year ago
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Thanks OP i needed this
I think it should take longer to make tv shows and movies. I think shooting days should be shorter. I think AD's lives should be longer. I think we shouldn't have to be in a goddamn rush all the time. I think we should have the time it takes to make good art. I think fans should wait even longer than they do and be happy that everyone who made the art is getting full nights of sleep.
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dordey · 17 days ago
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ik the recent commentary concerning makeup items becoming smaller is more about shrinkflation & that we're paying more money for less volume of product. but tbh haven't seen a bunch of people w the opinion that we don't Need huge amount of product in the first place. idc that makeup items are getting smaller as long as it costs a bunch less. would prefer that actually so i can actually use it up & try something new & am not holding onto things for 5+ years. & also it's easier to travel with smaller volume items or more compact packaging? (tangentially the concepts of salt new york or nudestix or subtl beauty are good in relation to packaging minimalism & product sizes (though nudestix is allegedly awful & also the quality is not good imo))
& tbf some brands already offer travel minis but 1. they're like half the size but still 3/4 of the cost when we Know that they cost a fraction of either of those prices to make. & then 2 they don't have all their shades available in mini sizes which is very limiting
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diabolocracy · 23 days ago
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I love being schizoid and all but I'd love it even more if there was a cure for anhedonia and avolition.
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pigeons-with-jello · 28 days ago
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i swear to yall im trying so so hard to sit down and write but school is trying to maim me and im fighting for my life rn
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snekdood · 6 months ago
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why do ppl you barely know or interact with at all think you give a huge fuck about interacting with them?
#yeah bitch i saw you. no i didnt give a fuck. who even are you sdhjfhvgsdvghfsd#we have no interacted enough for me to like. care? about talking to you or noticing you any further than 'ive interacted w that person#before'. but the way you rushed out was funny. nice to know i have that much power 😌#kind of tells me everything i need to know and all that shit about totally not interacting w that one friend group is probably bs#you probably rushed out of there to go talk to them about how you saw me#and yall like to believe lies bc you need to shit on me bc its the only way you can feel an ounce bit better about living a shitty life#and being oppressed. crabs in a bucket type behavior over here.#the only difference is yall somehow for some goddamn unknown reason to me think you're superior to me meanwhile conservatives#throw us all in the same bucket of 'weird' so i really dont think it matters. like i really dont think your attempt to shit on me is going#to change very much of anyones opinion on you...? like ppl are gonna call you weird queer ppl anyways? welcome to the club losers?#anyways keep coping by trying to shit on me but its not gonna make your life better babe. go smoke somethin.#really wild you'd treat another trans person- someone you know irl no less- like a lolcow when yall have 0 legs to stand on like#who do yall think you are that you get to feel this superiority complex? im begging to know.#like idk if yall know this but while you're desperately clawing to feel better than me my conservative brother is lumping us all together#as crazy dumb easily manipulated trans people like i promise no amount of trying to appease cis people by trying to come off as one of#the Good and Normal trans people is going to work for you and also you'll be dumped in the trash as soon as that totally weirder#person is out of the picture. like when im gone you're gonna be the weird ones babe so.#maybe find a more productive use of your time. perhaps a hobby.#and then maybe some day yall can have made as much art as i have and have as big of a following as me too. k? 💖#which isnt like a whole lot but im sure as fuck more known than any of you....................................... . . . .
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the-black-parade-system · 1 year ago
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just gonna vent in the tags cuz I feel like it-
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teememdee · 1 year ago
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post to hold me accountable for making some kind of call in the morning to maybe try and get an adhd diagnosis or something finally because i cannot handle this organically anymore
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pinkautist · 1 year ago
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man, h*zbin h*tel finally coming out reminded me of why i hate western fandom so much
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yearofthediamond-dogs · 2 years ago
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I'm christian now
#THE FINE LINE BETWEEN KNOWLEDGE OF MANIFESTING AND AWARENESS OF THE PRESENCE OF UNHINGED FUCKED UP UNFORTUNATE GENETICS#CURRENTLY I BELIEVE IF I THINK ABOUT IT GETS STRONGER. JANKY OUTPUT. CREATING MY OWN DEMISE#THIS SUCKS FUCKING ASS AND I ALSO HAVE APHANTASIA PRETTY MUCH SO I CAN'T COVER UP THE PATTERNS AND DISTORTED IMAGES OF EVERYTHING I DONT#WANT TO SEE BUT THEY'RE THERE AND FRACTALISED. SOMETIMES I CAN SEE IMAGES SO DISTANT AND BLURRY AND TRANSPARENT OVER THE BLACK BUT RN THEY#JUST DISSOLVE AND THE WEIRD SHIT TAKES OVER#I DON'T KNOW HOW TO HANDLE WHAT FEELS LIKE A 1/4 LOADED EGO DEATH#NOT THAT I'D MIND BUT I'D LIKE TO KEEP MY MEMORIES AND PERSONALITY THANKS#ANYWAY I NEED TO EXERCISE AND EAT FOOD AND STAY AWAY FROM THE VICES AND ENGAGE IN ANYTHING BUT THE DEGENARATE TIME-LEECH THAT IS COMPLACENCY#MOTHERFUCKER#NOT EVERYTHING IS A GODDAMN PATTERN OR SIGN AND YOU NEED TO ABANDON THIS PRETENTIOUS HUBRIS THAT THE ALL IS SOMETHING YOU CAN PUT LABELS ON#DIVINATION IS REAL THOUGH#AGAIN THIS FINE LINE#MAYBE I NEED A NEW HOBBY#NOT EVERYTHING IS A FUCKING SYNCHRONICITY. SOMETIMES EVENTS JUST HAPPEN. I MUST BECOME AWARE THAT I HAVE BEEN DESPARATLEY SEEKING SIGNS THAT#I AM CAPABLE OF CLIMBING OUT OF THE GODDAM PIT IVE BEEN IN FOR UNIRONICALLY MOST OF MY LIFE#AND SHIT IS REACHING A TIPPING POINT AND I ALSO JUST HAVE A GLITCHED IMAGE GENERATING SYSTEM AND THE HORRORS ARE ONLY BEING INTERPRETED#AS THE BEGINNING OF SCHIZOPHRENIA BC IM AFRAID OF IT. AND IM SEARCHING FOR AND SEEING PATTERNS IN EVERYTHING BECAUSE I WANT TO ANALYSE EVERY#SINGLE ATOM OF MYSELF AND MY SURROUNDINGS TO SEE IF I CAN FIGURE OUT JUST WHAT IT IS THAT I'M EXPERIENCING#ALSO ANTIPSYCOTIC MEDS NOW LIKE RN JUST IN CASE#THE RINGING IN YOUR EARS ISNT ANYTHING ITS JUST RINGING#NOT EVERYTHING IS A PATTERN AND EVENTS CAN JUST HAPPEN#AAAAHHH
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chaostudee · 6 months ago
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how you get the girl, lando norris.
summary : lando norris reveals in a interview that his celebrity crush is y/n. the majority of the grid teases him over his little crush but little do they know it is mutual. faceclaim : hailee steinfeld warnings : language?? a/n : aaaaagh 2nd win for lando im so happy :) hopefully ferrari can get on the podium in monza. also inspired by how you get the girl by taylor swift.
y/nusername felt cute. might delete later.
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liked by zendaya, florencepugh, landonorris and 1,719,910 others.
zendaya 🔥🔥
florencepugh damnnn girl
user01 goddamn
user11528 wowwww
sabrinacarpenter obsessed with u always
username_90 DONT DELETE GIRL PLEASE
user22 how tf is she single?!?!
y/nfan LITERALLY LIKE WHAT
user92 pick me choose me love me
mclaren new video out now !!
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liked by landonorris, zakbrown, f1fan and 479,929 others.
user828 OMG LOVE U MCLAREN
user01 they know what we want hehe
f1fan oh yesssss
username982 oh we are so backkkk
user_72 landoscar !!!!!
y/nusername
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》 user929 omlll she's so pretty wtfff
》 user00 so gorgeouss ughhh
》 y/nlover i cant wait for future projects hehe
》 y/nusername something coming soon 🤫
》 username_89 yesss y/n active era
f1updates lando norris reveals that his celebrity crush is y/n y/ln !!!
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liked by f1fan, f1lover, justaninchident and 129,920 others.
user01 stan oscar for calling him out hehe
f1fan UM WHAT
user472 he's so real for that acc
f1lover Y/N NEEDS TO SEE THIS PLSSS
justaninchident brb changing my name to y/n real quick
user555 so not normal about this
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y/nusername SPIDERMAN INTO THE SPIDERVERSE OUT JUNE 2ND !!!!
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liked by florencepugh, tomholland2013, zendaya and 1,293,920 others.
florencepugh yayyyy i cant waittt
zendaya eeeek so excited
tomholland2013 won't be better than homecoming.....but i have fate
user829 OMG OMG
user739 Y/N AS GWEN OH YES
username_777 i know where i will be june 2nd
lando.jpg
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liked by alexalbon , oscarpiastri, georgerussell and 282,710 others.
alexalbon bros a photographer now
landonorris just a hobby :)
user829 ugh his style lately 😩😩
user119 obsessed with him alwaysss
username_425 bros doing sidequests now
f1fan aagh we need more content like this plsss
f1lover im love his jewellery smmmm
oscarpiastri this week was a good one 😜
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liked by landonorris, y/nusername, georgerussell and 618,910 others.
landonorris :)
user289 your honour i love them !!!
user_19 ughhh they are so cuteeee
justanichident pookies
f1fan mclaren podiums are my favs :)
f1lover but carlando podiums 😚
y/nusername premiere in la last night
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liked by landonorris, florencepugh, zendaya and 917,291 others.
landonorris stunning
y/nusername tyyyyy
user82 oh this look im obsessedddd
f1fan not lando commenting plss he wants her so baddd
user910 she's so hot omg
florencepugh my bsf is so gorgeee
zendaya you ateee so baddd
jimmyfallon interview with y/n y/n out now !!
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liked by landonorris, f1fan, justaninchident and 628,019 others.
user8292 YES THIS IS THE CONTENT WE WANT
user00 okay truthfully i dont like jimmy fallon all that much but he ate with this one u fear
f1fan lando in the likes 🙈
f1lover heheheheheheehhe
username_29 girl was trying to keep it cool but she was blushing so badddd
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y/nusername miami gp 🏎🏁 @ mclaren
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liked by landonorris, mclaren, oscarpiastri and 828,001 others.
mclaren amazing having you in the garage today !!!
user929 EXCUSE ME WHAT
f1fan convinced lando invited her
user82 oh defo
user728 giggling
username_299 oh she's a menance for this
f1lover wait....are we going to get a lando and y/n pic???
justaninchident whos cares about the gp now I ONLY CARE ABOUT Y/N AND LANDO CONTENT
y/nusername finally met my celeb crush 🤭
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》 user899 I LOVE HER FOR THIS
》 f1fan SCREAMING
》 user11 LANDO HAS TO SEE THIS PLS I BEG
》 f1lover i just know that lando is dying rn
》 user0_811 no2 this is why i love y/n
》 georgerussell can confirm that lando did infact scream when he saw this.
landonorris first win feels.
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liked by y/nusername, oscarpiastri, charlesleclerc and 2,893,467 others.
y/nusername so happy for you !!!
landonorris thanksssss
oscarpiastri well deserved mate 🫶
georgerussell congrats !!
user929 EEK SO PROUD
user191 wdym we got y/n and landos first win today......best day everrrr !!!
username_19 i sobbed when he crossed the finished line
f1fan he's come so far 😭😭
justaninchident wdymmm lando just got his first win wtfff
user000 im convinced y/n was his lucky charm
username_10 this 🙌🙌
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landonorris guess it's not a secret anymore 😏
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liked by y/nusername, georgerussell, charlesleclerc and 2,729,920 others.
user72 help the emoji he's so unserious
user11 ughh i love them sm all ready
georgerussell reminder to never doubt you again
charlesleclerc i like to think that i had a part in this
y/nusername <3
username829 awwwww
justaninchident im sobbing acc
f1fan speechless
f1lover829 AS A MARVEL AND F1 FAN IM NOT OKAY
user243 screaming crying throwing up
y/nusername i love u sm baby
landonorris love u more angel
taglist ⭑.ᐟ
@mxryxmfooty
@lottalove4evelyn
@heavy-vettel
@llando4norris
@hadidsworld
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