#my new phone takes such better pictures than my old one yaaay

[beesgav]

Tochiro from the airport & Tochiro in the car

[especially-heinous-ada]

A Police Gala, pt. 13

I’m BACK! *bursts through door* I have returned from my hiatus, with a somewhat long Chapter 13 of APG. Just in time to celebrate my 200 followers milestone! Yaaay! I love you, everyone! Thank you for the support! 

Approximately 2600 words. In this Chapter, Rafael attends Kazuma’s dinner party, determined to find out once and for all whether his mysterious neighbor can truly be trusted. 

As always, feel free to holla at me in the comments, and I’ll do my best to holler back at everyone. I love reading everyone’s reactions. :) It motivates my writer’s soul. Lol. For any new readers, you can find the first 12 Chapters here.

And so, here it was: the eve of the highly-anticipated dinner party. Rafael anxiously pulled at his tie for practically the twentieth time that night. This had to go well. He had to get Kazuma’s fingerprints so that he could figure out who this mysterious neighbor really was. The safety of the both of you depended on it. It was all he was able to think about at the office today, resulting in an unproductive day of obsession and worry. Accordingly, he was in a rather foul mood.

He had bid his goodbye to you and sent you off with your police detail and a bodyguard quite some time ago now and you weren’t due back until near midnight. Rafael had explained the dinner party business to you and although you weren’t overly enthused about the idea, you agreed it was important to know who you were dealing with—especially given your circumstances.

The lack of your presence was certainly not helping Rafael’s mood. Feeling quite like a massive bundle of nerves, he paced back and forth, mind racing a mile a minute. It was the only thing he could do to try and calm himself.

“Damn it, where is he?” Rafael thought aloud.

Almost as if on cue, a rap came at the front door. Like a spring-loaded trap, the sound caused Rafael to launch into action. He lunged to the door, pulling it open to reveal Sonny Carisi.

“Hey, Barba. Sorry if I’m late, but that’s kinda the point, isn’t it?” Carisi laughed. Although he was relieved to see Sonny, Rafael’s sour mood didn’t sweeten much at the sight. He was still too wound up about going into the enemy’s lair.

“Let’s just go.” Rafael grumbled, pushing past Carisi into the hallway.

“And Y/N is gone for the night, right?”

“Yes, she’s out with some girlfriends. Rollins said they won’t be back until midnight, so no need to worry.” Carisi nodded as they stepped in front of Kazuma’s door. Rafael let out a massive sigh before knocking loudly.

A few beats passed and the door swung open. Behind it stood Kazuma, dressed in the suit he had picked up from the boutique that eventful day. Rafael’s eyes narrowed.

“You like it?” Kazuma asked with a smile, noticing Rafael’s focus.

“Oh, yes. Very stylish.” Rafael answered halfheartedly. In truth, it was a beautiful suit, however, he wondered if there was a purpose in Kazuma’s choice of attire tonight. Perhaps it was intended as a warning.

“Come on in, Rafael.” Kazuma invited. His gaze then turned to Carisi and he frowned. “And who is this?”

“Ah. This is my friend, Sonny. Y/N couldn’t make it on such short notice—she already made plans—but she sends her regards. I assumed you wouldn’t mind me inviting someone else, since you’d offered the option of a plus-one?”

Kazuma chuckled, motioning for the two to come inside. Once he closed the door behind them, he turned back to face the two.

“Well, I suppose it’s fitting, given the circumstances. My girlfriend couldn’t make it tonight, either; had to put in some overtime. Business is booming this time of year.”

Rafael’s eyes narrowed. How convenient that Kazuma’s girlfriend mysteriously couldn’t make it. Though he was probably thinking the same about your absence. As the three moved into the dining area, Rafael’s gaze darted to the table, where he found only three place settings.

Had Kazuma put away the fourth when his girlfriend called to cancel? Was there ever even a girlfriend to begin with, or was it his way of luring you into his apartment? Well, two could play the manipulation game; this was Rafael’s chance to search the premises without needing a warrant and an assist from the NYPD. Now it was time he took the matter into his own hands, he thought, as he chose a place setting to sit in front of.

“Sorry the place settings are right next to each other; I set it thinking it would be you and your lady friend.” Kazuma apologized, taking his seat at the head of the table. “Feel free to move around if it makes you more comfortable.”

Carisi took him up on the offer and slid his setting to an open chair across the table. When all three were seated, Kazuma raised a hand and snapped his fingers twice. A door on the other side of the room flew open and out emerged a chef with a large, covered platter. He hurried to the table and set the platter down, removing the lid and revealing a delectably cooked roast.

The scent that rushed out when the roast was exposed was intoxicating. Rafael hadn’t eaten since that morning; he was too worried about tonight. For a brief moment, his hunger made him forget the true reason he was here. The chef then busied himself with pouring each man a glass of wine.

“That roast looks delicious,” Carisi announced, “My compliments to the chef.” Having finished pouring, the chef set down the bottle and gave a small, awkward bow, seeing himself out of the room.”

“A private chef? I’m flattered. That couldn’t have been cheap.” Rafael schmoozed, wanting to keep his host in a good mood.

“Ah, well—he’s my own, personal chef. I’m a terrible cook.” Kazuma chuckled. Rafael and Sonny both joined in, though to varying degrees of sincerity.

Piercing through the laughter in the room, a phone rang loudly.

“Oh, that’s me.” Kazuma said, retrieving his cell phone from the breast pocket of his suit. Glancing at the caller ID, he stood. “I’m sorry, I’ve got to take this—an important business call.”

“That’s alright, we get it.” Carisi replied diplomatically before Kazuma dismissed himself from the room. Rafael downed his glass of wine.

Sure. Right. ‘Business call.’ Rafael scoffed inside his head, though he gave no outward sign he disbelieved the legitimacy of Kazuma’s “business.” He had become skilled at hiding his inner thoughts as a result of his years in the courtroom. Attorneys whose emotions got the better of them always had a tell that could be used against them, but not Rafael.

No sooner did the door swing shut after Kazuma than Rafael and Sonny stood to begin searching their surroundings. Deciding it would be better to split up and cover more ground, Rafael went back out to the living room area. He needed an item that would have a clear fingerprint from Kazuma on it.

The remote? No; that gets used too much. He’d know it was missing for sure.

They needed something used often enough for him to leave prints on, but not so often as to be obviously missing following their friendly visit. Rafael’s eyes darted around the room, searching for a viable option, when suddenly, they froze on a small, black picture frame on a shelf. He stepped forward to get a better look.

There were two young boys. They appeared to be sitting on a set of rusty, worn out swings at a park. One wore an ear-to-ear smile and the other an “I’m-too-cool-for-this” sneer. It was a look he’d seen often growing up, from the wannabe gangsters of his neighborhood.

Kazuma has children? No. They can’t be his; they’d have to be about ten, and there’s no way he’s old enough for that unless he became a father before 18. Not that it’s unheard of, but I don’t see him as that type.

Frowning, Rafael pondered the photo a moment more before Carisi entered the room.

“I think we should sit back down before he—those his kids?” Rafael shook his head.

“I don’t think so. But we can’t rule it out for certain unless we ask him… which we can’t do, because he can’t know we’ve been poking around.”

“I couldn’t find anything good in there. It’s all expensive—way too conspicuous if I take it. What about you?”

“I haven’t been able to find—” Rafael was halfway through his sentence when Kazuma walked through the doorway. “—the bathroom.” He altered, seeing Kazuma’s figure appear. Carisi frowned, not having seen Kazuma enter the room. Rafael’s eyes darted toward the doorway to send Carisi a nonverbal message. Luckily for him, Carisi understood and turned, seeing Kazuma for the first time since he’d entered.

“Hey, uh, Kazuma, where’s your bathroom?” He asked. “We’ve been trying to find it. I’ve been holding it all through dinner.”

“Well it’s right over—” Carisi’s cell phone began to blare in his pocket. Alarmed, he reached for it and answered instantly, cutting Kazuma off.

“Carisi.” He announced. In the silence of the room, Rafael could hear a woman’s voice barking orders on the other line—Liv.

“Right. You got it, Lieu. I’ll be right there.” Oh, no. Sonny ended the call, stuffing the phone back into his pocket and darting his gaze back and forth between Rafael’s and Kazuma’s faces. “I gotta go; there’s an emergency. They need me at the precinct.” Kazuma frowned.

“How disappointing.” He turned to Rafael. “Well, I guess it’ll just be me and you dining tonight.” Rafael shot an exasperated look at Sonny, who sent an apologetic one back before rounding and exiting the apartment. Rafael cursed his rotten luck; neither he nor Sonny had been able to secure a fingerprint during the search.

Kazuma motioned toward the dining room and, resigned, Rafael re-entered the room, taking his seat once more at the table. Grabbing the wine bottle, he poured himself another glass, downing it quickly in frustration. The two resumed eating and it was silent for what seemed an eternity. The waiter brought out a second bottle of wine and Rafael sipped at a third glass, when Kazuma finally broke the silence.

“So. How long have you been dating Y/N?” Caught off guard, Rafael stuttered slightly, setting down the glass before managing a coherent response.

“Ah—it’s still pretty new.” Kazuma nodded.

“And what’s that like? Dating a celebrity?” Rafael cleared his throat before answering.

“She’s amazing—practically perfect in every way.” He mused, unable to hold back a proud smile.

“I have to say, I’m in awe of you. How did you get a woman like that? I mean, she’s a literal supermodel.”

“Uh, luck?” Rafael chuckled, lifting a brow. All these questions about you were setting off alarm bells in his mind. Why was Kazuma so curious about you? He’d better keep his answers short and vague. Kazuma opened his mouth once again, but before he could say a word, a loud clattering sounded off in the distance and a woman’s voice cried out. The two men instantly turned their attention toward the noise, standing and moving to the exit of the apartment. Once Rafael stepped into the hallway, he saw the source of the commotion.

On the floor outside his apartment was a tangled mass of limbs. Three women were in a pile after, he supposed, tripping and falling atop one another. At the bottom of the pile, he spotted you. His heart skipped a beat and he rushed to pull you free.

“Ow.” You muttered as he stood you up, pulling you in to lean against his chest for support.

“Y/N. Are you alright?” Rafael asked, nervous for your safety. You looked up at him. It seemed to take you a few moments to recognize him, but when you did, you beamed brightly.

“Heyyy, Rafael.” You giggled, swaying in place a bit. Rafael could detect the smell of alcohol on your breath. He frowned. Now was not a good time to walk around inebriated. Though, he couldn’t say he blamed you for wanting to drink and forget your litany of worries. He sighed.

“You scared me.” You frowned.

“I’m sorry, Rafi.” By now, the other girls had stirred to their feet.

“Where’s Amanda?” Rafael urged, trying not to make it obvious he was referring to Rollins, who was supposed to be your detail for the night. You giggled again.

“We gave her the slipppp~”

Kazuma chuckled.

“Looks like you’ve got your hands full there, Rafael.” He said, raising his eyebrows. “How about we just call a raincheck on dinner?” Rafael gave a quick nod of agreement before turning back to you, sweeping you into his arms.

Oooh, he’s so warm. You thought, as you felt Rafael cradle you in his arms. You felt a little disoriented. The room seemed to swirl and sway around you, but you trusted Rafael’s steady strength. You could hear his dress shoes clack across the hardwood of his apartment as he moved. A long, slow creaking noise signaled that he had gently pushed the bedroom door open.

How come he always seemed to be carrying you into the bedroom? You pondered for a fraction of a moment before deciding you didn’t care. Being doted on by Rafael was the best thing ever, in your mind. You let out a big, contented sigh, throwing your arms around his neck. He stopped in place and looked into your eyes.

Those lively, stunning eyes. He knew he’d never get over them. As worried as he’d been when he’d found you out in the hallway, he was relieved to see you again. To hold you close and feel your reassuring warmth. As he laid you down on the bed and loosened your arms from his neck, he couldn’t help but wonder who was rescuing who in this situation.

“I loooove youuuuuu~” you sang through a cheesy grin as you looked up at Rafael from where he sat down next to you on the bed. “You’re the greatest.” He couldn’t help but laugh, laying back and settling in next to you.

“The greatest what?” He prompted, needing an ego boost after the day he’d had.

“The greatest everything!” You responded, snuggling into him. He let out an amused sigh as you slung a leg over him, pulling him closer. “My everything, and the greatest~”

Though it didn’t entirely make sense, Rafael was still flattered by your tipsy singing. It was dangerous for you to be drunk while dangerous men prowled the streets, waiting to exact revenge. He was petrified when he’d seen that Rollins was missing from your company. However, despite all that, he was glad you’d been able to have fun and escape the terrifying reality of your current situation, if only for a short time.

“Rafi’s the beeest~! Best around! Boyfriend in tooown~!” You sang quietly, though enthusiastically, and the vibrations rumbled into Rafael’s chest, creating a pleasant, heartwarming sensation. His eyes fluttered shut for just a moment before his phone sounded off in his breast pocket. He reached for it without opening his eyes and held it to his ear, answering absentmindedly, unwilling to pull himself from the contentment of this moment. His face felt warm, and he wasn’t sure if the heat was caused by you, or the wine.

“Barba.” He answered lazily.

“Oh, my god, Barba, it’s Y/N! She—!”

“I know, Rollins, she’s with me.” Rafael knowingly eased. Rollins let out a massive sigh of relief from the other end.

“That girl is going to give me a heart attack. You’ve really got your hands full with that one, you know that?” Amused, Rafael let out a single chuckle—a quick, sharp exhale of air.

“Tell me something I don’t know.” You gave a dainty little yawn and stretched before returning to your tired, inebriated, almost whisper-like singing. “You headed over to guard the apartment?”

“I’m about to step into the elevator. You’re probably safe going to sleep now, if you’re tired. I’ll be in in a few.”

“That’s alright, I don’t think I’m going to be sleeping any time soon, if Y/N gets her way.” You giggled as you climbed on top of him. “Speaking of which, you should probably wait outside for a while before coming in.” He added as you tossed your dress to the floor beside the bed.

“Gross, Barba.”

He hung up the phone with a grin, wondering how he ever got so lucky as he looked up at you straddling him.

[specialmindz]

CA-THINK!

Gaster opened the door to the nursery, looking tired and annoyed.

“Sans, could you PLEASE keep your brother quiet? You have one job.”

The young Font nodded but didn’t bother telling him who was really responsible for the noise. Even if Flowey WAS trying to avoid Papyrus and only Papyrus, Sans could already predict what would happen if he ratted him out.

He’ll be a jackass and leave the air vent...assuming I can get Dad to believe there’s a talking flower in there to begin with.

He waited for his father to leave the room, but curiously, he did not. Instead, the scientist pulled on something behind him, apparently trying to bring something heavy through the nursery door.

“Don’t bother lending me your assistance or anything Sans. That would just be too much.”

“i thought i had one job?”

Grunting, Gaster finally pulled the thing he was struggling with into the room and sat it where Papyrus’s crib used to be...much to the baby bone’s dismay.

“DIS is my new cwib? Dis piece of cap right here?”

“It’s not a piece of crap, and you should be grateful for whatever you get.”

Sans looked at the new crib, if you could even CALL it new that is. The addition was gross. The metal sheen had long since worn off, leaving it rusty and bare, and some of the bars were missing to the point where the remaining might as well have not even been there. It was definitely in need of at LEAST a mattress and it was definitely from the Dump.

“this looks dangerous dad...”

“You buy dis wit food stamps?”

“It doesn’t matter, this is all you’re getting.”

“We poor now? We got da’ poor?”

“you don’t catch poor, baby bro. it’s not a disease; who told you that?”

A cough emanated from the air vent.

“Does dis mean I can eats at the Dump now?” asked Papyrus, ignoring his brother.

“Absolutely not! We aren’t poor-”

“Then you should buy baby a new cwib...cause’ I’s not sweeping in dat one. I needs my cwib to be cushy for mah tushie!”  

“Then you can borrow. my. FOOT, because I am NOT scouring the Dump for another one just so you can ruin it.”

“Imma tell da’ king you’s trying to give baby tetnis.” 

“Rust doesn’t cause tetanus, so go right ahead.” 

“Imma tell da’ king you’s trying to give me da’ poor.”

“Are you done? You’re either sleeping here or in the toy box, end of discussion.”

CA-THUNK!

Gaster left the nursery, closing the door behind him.

“UCK YOU DOUCHE DADDY! I’ll SWEEP AT DA’ KING’S HOUSE! NYEH!” 

Papyrus rolled onto his back and kicked at the new crib with both feet angrily. “NYEH NYEH NYEH!”

CLANG CLANG CLANG!

“hey bro, quit it!”

“NYEHHHHHHHAAAHHH!!”

CLANG CLANG CLANG CLANG CLANG!

“KNOCK IT OFF BRAT!”

Papyrus instantly stopped and glared at the air vent.

“Yell at me again. Yell at me again, Dirt-Butt and see if I don’t shove my juice box up your juice box.”

“What? What does that even MEAN? Is that supposed to be scary or...?”

“i think he just threatened to shove his juice box up your vagina Flowey,” said Sans chuckling.

Damn bro, where’d you hear that?

“Oh, oh yeah? You think your tough huh? Thug life straight out the womb?”

“I’ll slaps you like yo’ mama should have, nyeh heh heh!” 

A growl was heard from within the air vent, and to Sans’ surprise, Flowey emerged and jumped out...immediately face-planting on the carpet.

“UGH! WHAT THE HELL?!”

WHERE’S THE FRIGGEN’ CRIB MATTRESS?!

“Ooooh, you’s small as hell Dirt-Butt! You slip right through the holes!”

“you alright lil’ guy?”

Flowey got up and looked behind him. There really WAS no crib mattress! He hadn’t been able to see it very well through the grating he slipped through, but now he could tell just what a piece of crap it truly was.

Had he a soul, he might of felt bad for Papyrus, but right now all he felt was hate for the lazy good-for-nothing who’d unintentionally fooled him into embarrassing himself. 

Gibberish-speaking FREAK! Who does he think he is, disobeying MY dad like that?! I KNOW he was ordered to look after these two. Does he think he can just do whatever he wants just because he’s the royal scientist?! 

“Oh you poor baby! Your dad really DOESN’T know how to be a good parent does he?” 

“...”

“You can’t sleep in this...you SHOULDN’T have to sleep in this. Maybe staying at the king’s house is not so bad an idea. He lost his two kids you know, that means he has two free beds that aren’t being used...”

“so?”

“So I’m sure he wouldn’t mind letting you stay with him when he hears about this. He LOVES children, maybe you two should pay him a visit?”

Heh heh heh...

“you’re talking about running away.”

“It’s not ‘running away,’ it’s visiting a lonely old man. Think of how sad he must be! All alone in a big empty house...his family destroyed...” 

“Awww, dat’s sad. Isn’t dat sad Snas? We should go visit Fluffy Buns and give him a hug. Erybody loves a hug from a good baby!”

“don’t..don’t call him that bro.”

“I bet he’d LOVE a hug from you. It’d probably make his whole day.”

Come on...come on you dumb little-

“sure, whatever. maybe dad’ll take care of us better if he knows we’re willing to leaf.”

YES!!

“That’s great!” said Flowey ignoring the pun. “He’s gonna be soooo happy! The king I mean.”

HA HA HA HA! SAY GOODBYE TO YOUR JOB, NERD!  Maybe you can find work at a funeral home somewhere, HA HA HA HA HA HA HA!

...

Why DOES he wear black all the time?

“Yaaay!” Papyrus bounced up in down on his rear end excitedly, picturing he and his brother cuddling up together in the giant bed. 

His old crib and the toy box were too small for Sans to fit into, but this one would be different. He had actually seen the bed before while exploring the Underground and it was exactly like the one in Goldilocks and the Three Bears! Not only would it fit them both, but they could roll around too, without the fear of falling out in the middle of the night. He missed being small enough to hug Sans while he slept... 

“Less go now kay’? Right now.”   

“wh-now? pap, it’s nine at night-”

“Then it’ll be a surprise!” said Flowey quickly. “It’ll be like Present Day for him, trust me.”

Sans gave him a skeptical look, but said nothing. He didn’t believe for a second that Flowey had their best interests in mind, but he felt a need to avenge his brother somehow.

Besides there was nothing worse than unproductive laziness. If someone wanted to do something half-assed then they needed to make sure they were successful, otherwise it was just sloppy work.

“alright everyone, hold onto me.”

“Uhh, no. Thanks but no thanks Trashbag. I’d rather stay here.”

So I can see the look on that freak’s face when he gets that phone call, heh heh heh...  

“GACK!”

Papyrus grabbed Flowey’s stem and promptly put him in his mouth like a dog carrying a bone, then he lifted his arms up, signaling to his brother that he wanted to be carried too.

“heh, alright lil’ guy. hrrup! let’s get outta here.” 

“EW! EW-HEH HEWWW! SMILEYYY, HE’S DROOLING ON ME! GET HIM OFF!!” 

“E gots to take Fuffy Bunny too, Nas!”

“you want to take your fluffy bunny book? why? that thing’s evil!” 

“Nah if ooh find Fuffy Bunny...”

“OH GOD I CAN FEEL HIS TONGUE, AND HIS BREATHE SMELLS LIKE BABY FORMULA! I CAN’T BREATHE!!” 

Picking up the strange book, Sans closed his eyes and pictured as hard as he could exactly where he wanted to go.

It was always hard to keep his mind focused long enough to teleport as he had an imagination more powerful than most, but this time, not only was he unfamiliar with the destination, but he had Flowey screaming in the background. 

It’s going to take me awhile to clear my thoughts with this weed distracting me and making me wanna laugh.

“could you please stop screaming? i can’t concentrate and if i make a mistake...”

“NO I WON’T STOP YELLING, I DON’T EVEN WANNA GO! GET YOUR DISGUSTING BROTHER OFF ME!!”

Sans sighed and tried again. Obviously Flowey didn’t realize how bad the consequences could be if he were to mess up. Usually when he traveled like this he would error and wind up in the location, but not the exact place he was thinking of. When he went to Waterfall, he’d sometimes find himself in the water near the docks, ruining his cellphone, or on top of one of Undyne’s favorite rocks, making him try it again just so he could get down safely. He always had a constant fear of ending up stuck in between a wall or building and he NEVER teleported to Hotland.

Sucks that I live HERE of all places. There’s lava everywhere, and the walkways are so narrow...

“Nyeh? I e no go et?”

“uh, sorry pap. i was thinking about hotland. it sucks that i can’t just take a shortcut there. i have to walk all the time...”

“Oh my GOD, you’re lazy. So what if you can’t teleport to Hotland!? You can get to the lab just fine!” exclaimed Flowey, tired of screaming.

“yeah, but it’s at the BEGINNING of hotland-”

“There’s nothing there.”

“but what if i wanted to go for some reason?”

“THERE’S NOTHING THERE SMILEY. Can we go already?! The more we wait the more petals I have to tear off and regrow. Your idiot brother’s obviously not going to put me down-”

“Nyeh heh heh...”

“OR CARRY ME WITH ONE OF HIS TWO FREE HANDS, so-”

“papyrus, take him out of your mouth.”

“Kay’.” Papyrus removed the plant from his between his teeth, clutching him in his tiny fist.

“good boy pappy. hey, uh flowey, i don’t suppose you have a picture of the king’s bedroom or maybe the other kid’s do ya’?”

“Wh-NO! NO I DON’T HAVE PICTURE’S OF THEIR BEDROOMS!” cried the flower incredulously. “WHY WOULD I HAVE THAT?! WHAT KIND OF A CREEP DO YOU THINK I AM?!”

“the kind that hides in air vents and watches children.”

“...”  

“I gots one!” cried the baby bones excitedly pulling a photo out of his onesie. He handed it to Sans smiling triumphantly.

It felt good to be useful.

The image itself was dark, but still clear. A picture of the king’s room...or at least his bed anyway. In it lay Asgore, sleeping peacefully after a hard day’s work next to a figure he couldn’t quite make out. Sans wasn’t sure when it was taken, but if his highness wasn’t losing sleep, then it had to of been before he lost his family. Nowadays the king looked like he wasn’t sleeping at all.

The other figure must be his wife.

“Why do you have that?”

“I gots anudder one too, just in case he be seeping.”

Papyrus pulled out another photo. This one had was of the kid’s room, though it was a close-up of only one of the beds within. In it lay a sleeping goat child in green, clutching a blanket in one of his paws.

“...”

“They smell like grass big Buther.”

“I want that photo.”

“*pfft!* heh heh ha ha ha! papyrus you can’t-heh hee hee! you c-can’t just take pictures of people pappy, especially their kids-”  

“Why not?! Dis my friend and he fluffy as hell!”

“Give me that photo.”

“it’s illegal, that’s why! even if they don’t put babies in jail, they can STILL find this when you’re an adult, and you’ll STILL get in trouble.”

“Nuh uh! It says on da’ back when it be taken. They gonna know I tooks it when I’s widdle, and cause’ they know babies don’t know any bedder, I won’t go to jail.”

“You’ll go to hell if you don’t give me that photo you little creep...”

“well you still shouldn’t have it. we can’t use these anyway, the kid’s bed is too close to the wall and the king might be asleep.”

“But...I do not wish to sweep in da’ trash cwib...*sniff*” The tiny skeleton dropped Flowey and wrapped his arms around Sans’ neck, burying his head in his hoodie sadly. He had been waiting for a new crib for a long time now, and this was a massive disappointment. There was no way he could sleep in that rusty junk heap, but a toy box was no place for a baby either.

“Nyehhh...”

“aww, *tsk* don’t cry baby bro...tell ya’ what, we’ll give it a shot, how’s that?”

The baby bones nodded and looking at the picture, Sans took his shortcut.

“HEY ASSHOLES, YOU LEFT ME BEHIND!!” 

[botanistlester]

Sweet Pea (14/34)

Summary: A nickname that goes bitter in your mouth. Cries for help that no one listens to. Gentle hands that make you quake on the ground you’re standing on. When Phil first met Nico, he thought he was a gift from the heavens. But behind the mask lies something daunting, something unnerving, that Phil never foresaw. Through his journey, he finds solace in Dan, the regular at his workplace, who seems to be the only one who sees through Nico’s mask to the darkness underneath. Warnings: Abusive relationship, violence A/N: So i had to split chapter 14 into two different parts because otherwise this chapter was going to be literally 8k words long and I didn’t want that, so that means that I had to bump up the number of chapters yaaay (uggghh). thanks to @snowbunnylester for editing this for me! The lyrics at the beginning of this fic are from the song Misanthropic Drunken Loner by Days N Daze!

I have started a patreon account for those of you who would like to support me and my writing endeavors! You can find my patreon account here, and also find more information about perks of this here!

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-

Chapter Fourteen

I feel like we're playing tug of war and i'm the rope and i'm stretched to the limit but you keep on pulling it. I'm gonna lose my god damned mind.

-

Three days passed before Phil decided to suck it up and go back to his own apartment. By then, the swelling of his tongue had gone down enough that he could finally talk properly, and his phone already had another twenty-two missed calls.

It had been four days since Nico had left. Four days since he had told Phil that he had three days to make a decision. Four days since Nico had left Phil crying on the shower floor with a bruise on his cheek and a shattered heart.

The fact of the matter was that Phil didn’t actually feel ready to go back home. He didn’t want to see the place where Nico had spent hours per day lounging on his couch or sleeping in his bed. He didn’t want to see the items Nico had forgotten, strewn across his floor. He didn’t want to lay in his bed and smell the musky, flowery scent of Nico left on his sheets. He didn’t want to arrive at a place where Nico had promised him he would find someone else if Phil didn’t decide to come back to him in three days.

His mum had kissed him on the cheek and sent him off with a bag of freshly-baked cookies, completely unaware of his inner turmoil. She had told him to call her if he needed anything and to let her know if or when he decided to drop out of class (little did she know, he had already done so the night he had suggested the idea).

When he’d left his mum’s, though, he’d thought he could do it. He’d thought he could unlock his door and walk inside as if it were nothing. He’d thought he could lay on the couch with a bag of crisps and horrible reruns of New Girl and forget that the last year with Nico had ever happened.

But he soon found out that he just couldn’t do it.

His apartment building loomed over him, tall and seeming like it was just waiting to eat him up. He hadn’t even gotten to his own door before he’d begun to shake, his feet glued to the spot. He couldn’t do it, couldn’t move no matter how hard he tried to. There was a bitter taste raising in his throat, his forehead was beginning to sweat, and he was certain that he was going to puke.

Just then, his phone buzzed in his pocket and he drew it out with quivering fingers. Dan’s name flashed across his screen, and he didn’t even think about it before he unlocked his phone and dialed Dan’s number.

The phone rang once before Dan answered, voice both urgent and concerned. “Hello? Phil?”

Phil took a deep, shaky breath. He didn’t know if it was a good idea to call Dan yet, but it was better than nothing. He just hoped Dan didn’t hate him enough to deny him company in this trying time.

“I know that you probably hate me after everything that’s happened, but I just got home and I’m standing outside of my flat and I can’t- I can’t do it,” he rambled, his words coming out in a quick succession of breath. “I keep thinking about how much time Nico has spent with me there and I feel sick and I want to go inside but I physically can’t. I want- I don’t-!” He cut himself off because he was breathing too hard to formulate any other words. It was like his chest had suddenly restricted and he couldn’t breathe.

“Phil? Phil, take some deep breaths,” Dan said quietly, his voice sounding tinny and detached through the phone. “In through your nose, out through your mouth. I’m not mad at you, I’m still here for you whenever you need me, okay?” Phil nodded, even though Dan couldn’t see him. He tried to breathe, to get himself to settle down, but it was the hardest thing he’d ever had to do in his life. “Do you need me to come over? You don’t have to tackle this alone.”

Phil nodded again, a tiny sob escaping his throat. “Y-yes ple-ease.”

“I’ll be right over, okay? I’m gonna get off the phone now so I can get over there.”

“No!” Phil shouted before he could stop himself. He shivered, taking another deep breath before he could start hyperventilating again. “Can y-you stay on the phone w-with me?”

He heard Dan let out a sad sounding chuckle that wasn’t really a chuckle at all. Instead, Dan sounded rather sad when he laughed. Phil didn’t like that at all. He felt as though he was the cause for this. Or even worse, he felt as though maybe Dan didn’t even want to talk to him anymore, and that’s why he’d done such an awkward laugh. “Of course. I won’t hang up the phone.” Phil was grateful for that, even though he probably didn’t deserve the amount of kindness after everything he’d put Dan through.

But true to his word, Dan stayed on the phone with him. Even if they weren’t speaking the entire time, Phil enjoyed his company. The sound of Dan’s breathing calmed him down a considerable amount, made it so Phil’s quivering ceased just slightly. Phil kind of disconnected. He could see, could hear, but he couldn’t really focus on anything. The only thing he could truly focus on was the door to his flat and how it was so close, so familiar, but with a strange darkness that he couldn’t really put his finger on it.

Before he knew it, Dan was there beside him, putting an arm around his shoulders. He was a warmth amidst the coolness of the morning breeze, the safety net that Phil wasn’t entirely sure he deserved. It was with that that Phil came back to reality, shaking his head and looking up at Dan to see that Dan was smiling softly at him.

“We can do this,” Dan told him.

His voice a promise, and the words were the first and only words Dan had spoken to him in person since Phil had kicked him out. He didn’t mention the past, Phil’s new piercings, or even why Phil was having a break down in front of his flat. Instead, he was soothing, trying to coax Phil into tackling this hurdle. Together.

“You ready to do this with me? I won’t leave your side.”

Phil hesitated, Dan’s assurances ringing through his ears. Dan wasn’t leaving. Dan was right there. He didn’t have to enter his home by himself. Dan was there.

Slowly, he nodded his head. “Ready as I’ll ever be,” he breathed, feeling a bit dizzy.

Actually going inside was a slow process. Phil cried. A lot. Dan had to rub his back and tell him that Nico wasn’t inside, that Phil didn’t have to see him anymore. He didn’t know whether he was glad or sad that Nico wasn’t there. He didn’t know whether he wanted to even see him, but something in him yearned for Nico.

He wondered what would happen if Nico showed up on his doorstep; if he would run away screaming or fall into his arms. For some reason, Phil reckoned he would do the latter.

Phil put the lock into the doorknob, but he didn’t twist it yet. He took some deep breaths. In, out, in out. He swore he could already smell the lingering scent of Nico in the air. His mind was playing tricks on him, telling him all about the time where Nico had pressed him against the door and kissed the fuck out of him, at least until their neighbour had walked past and told them to at least go inside. They had laughed so much then, but now, Phil’s lungs felt restricted, like he could hardly breathe, and he swayed a little on his feet as he finally turned the lock to get out of his headspace.

As soon as he entered the flat, Phil’s chest got tight. He could see memories of Nico all the way from his front door. There was a shirt on the couch that belonged to Nico, there was a dish of banana bread they’d baked together sitting on the counter, even a framed picture of he and Nico wearing matching Pokemon shirts. He could smell the musky scent of Nico lingering in the air, as though it was never going to go away, and Phil went to light a candle before remembering that Nico had given him the Pumpkin Pie candle sitting atop his window sill, and he stopped himself in his tracks.

There was too much. It was too much.

“I’m going to be sick,” Phil gasped before he was bolting to the bathroom, Dan hot on his tail.

He didn’t throw up.

For that, he was thankful. Instead, he was sweaty, and cold, and he couldn’t stop spitting up in the toilet, trying to expel something from his stomach. Dan rubbing his back the whole time and held a cold towel to the back of his neck, but it only helped slightly. How pathetic could he be, nearly puking because he’d walked into his own home?

“I’m sorry,” Phil whimpered into the toilet. He was practically hugging the appliance, his arms resting on the seat and his forehead resting atop his arms.

He didn’t have to look to know that Dan was shaking his head. Perhaps Phil just knew him that well now that he could predict his actions before he did them. He could also guess Dan’s next words, which were, “You have nothing to be sorry for.”

But the fact of the matter was that Phil did have to be sorry. Dan didn’t deserve this. He deserved better than Phil. He shouldn’t have to spend his weekend taking care of a twenty-year old man who was just going through a bad break up. It was just a break up, for God’s sake! They happened all the time, and yet Phil was acting as if he’d just been shot!

Phil wiped his mouth on the back of his hand and attempted to stand up. He didn’t know how long he’d been on his knees in front of the toilet, only knew that it must have been a long time from the way his knees cracked

“Alright. Okay. I think I should be fine. Let’s just… watch the telly or something.”

“Are you sure you’re up for it?” Dan asked quietly, brushing Phil’s hair out of his face. He didn’t flinch when Phil slapped his hand away, didn’t even look phased. Maybe he understood Phil better than he’d originally thought.

“I want to be normal,” Phil told him, putting the damp towelette on the counter and beginning to walk to the lounge. “I want to go back to how things were before he poisoned my home.”

Except Phil didn’t remember how things used to be. He could only remember vague things; he liked to sing even though he was horrible at it, he enjoyed school and had wanted to be an English teacher one day, he liked to write stories, he liked to wear v-necks and tank tops because he liked the way they felt against his skin...

He didn’t really sing anymore, not even in the shower. He’d dropped out of school and honestly didn’t see much of a future for himself, so he didn’t write much anymore either. And he certainly didn’t wear v-necks or tank tops, instead sticking to unflattering band shirts, baggy jumpers, and jeans.

Why had he changed so much in such a short period of time, and why couldn’t he remember how he acted before all of this? Why couldn’t he remember how to be himself? Why couldn’t he remember what being happy without Nico was?

Dan didn’t argue anymore. He merely nodded and helped Phil get back to the living room with one hand hovering comfortingly behind Phil’s back but never actually touching. It was both uncomfortable and nice, so Phil didn’t say anything, merely collapsing on the couch the second he and Dan reached the front of it. Of course, that’s when a loud knock sounded at the door. Phil gave Dan an alarmed stare, his heart sinking to his knees. He hadn’t been expecting anyone else.

Only a single thought ran through his head as his heart started pounding so loud he could feel it thrumming throughout his body.

He hadn’t locked the door.

Standing, Phil shifted to move quickly towards the door, to lock it, to lock out whoever was there, afraid to find out who it might be. He didn’t want to deal with anyone, especially if that someone was someone he didn’t welcome here. Because the thing was, he knew exactly who it was. The only person who didn’t let him know ahead of time before showing up was Nico, the same Nico who made Phil’s entire body shake, who made Phil’s head so loud he couldn’t think.

But before he could get to the door, the knob turned, the door was pushed open, and there in the threshold stood the angriest man that Phil had ever seen.

Nico.

Rage was coming off of him in the form of flames. His green eyes held venom that choked Phil, making him unable to breathe. His curly hair was wild, more out of place than Phil had ever seen, and his muscles were practically bulging through his shirt, even though he wasn’t even that fit. His hands were clenched into fists at his sides and his nostrils were flared, and Phil completely shrunk under his gaze.

He could see Dan get up out of the corner of his eye, could see the way Nico’s eyes immediately flicked over to Dan, his face getting ever angrier. Phil didn’t want to be here. He shouldn’t have come back. He should have stayed at his mum’s for much longer, until Nico had forgotten who he was, until Phil couldn’t remember the way his name sounded coming from pretty pink lips.

Pretty pink lips that had the power to destroy him.

Nico shut the door behind him. The sound made Phil wince and cave in on himself a little bit. He was shivering, quaking in his shoes, and he didn’t really know when he had gotten so afraid of Nico, but suddenly he couldn’t stop. When Nico laughed, his head thrown back, his voice booming through the unfamiliar familiarness of the room, Phil’s lungs nearly collapsed.

“So this is what you’ve been up to, huh?” Nico asked, his tone quiet and icy cold. His eyes flickered between Phil and Dan, his lips screwing up in a nasty frown. “As soon as I leave, you find another man to fuck? I suppose that’s what sluts do, though. They just fuck and fuck until they can’t anymore.” It seemed then that Nico zeroed in on the piercing in Phil’s nose, one that was suddenly so heavy that Phil imagined he could barely lift his head up anymore.

Nico made a disgusted noise. “A septum piercing? Seriously? I didn’t think you could get even more ugly, but I proved myself wrong.”

Phil’s eyes burned at the words, and he sniffled. He felt filthy, disgusting. How could he have ever believed Nico thought he was beautiful? Of course he wasn’t, but Nico had loved him anyway, and Phil had been so lucky... He clenched his teeth shut so he didn’t open his mouth and show off the other piercing hidden inside. He couldn’t believe he’d let himself do something like this, that he’d knowingly gone behind Nico’s back to get something that Nico obviously hated.

Now Nico would never want him again.

Phil didn’t get a chance to speak up and reply, however, as Dan spoke up before him. For once, Phil actually let him speak. He didn’t want to kick Dan out again. He didn’t want to let him go. For a single moment, Phil wanted to cling onto him, to never let him go.

“You’re pathetic, you know that?” Dan said coolly, crossing his arms over his chest. Phil couldn’t look at either of them anymore, so he just stared at his socked feet, at how one sock had hot sauce on it and the other had lemons. “You can’t just barge in here and badmouth Phil like that. You’re not welcome here anymore. Phil’s allowed to do what he wants now. And I’m pretty sure that he doesn’t want you here.”

Phil didn’t need to look at Nico to know that he was probably preparing for murder. He didn’t need to look to know the exact expression that showed on his face right then. The way that his eyes narrowed, how his mouth screwed up in a nasty snarl, how he seemed to loom over them despite his short stature. Phil kept his eyes on the ground, even as Nico spoke.

Phil’s vision began to swim a bit. He hated himself. He hated that he was so scared of the man that he was so in love with. He hated that he was considering abandoning Nico just like Nico’s father abandoned him. He hated that he felt crazy, like he was torn between two feelings - longing and fear - and it was quite literally making him question his own sanity. He was a mess, and anybody could clearly see that.

“Is that so?” Nico asked, his voice strangely calm to anybody’s ears but Phil’s. To Phil, that tone was menacing. That tone meant he was planning something. “Then why don’t you let him tell me that?”

Phil flinched. He couldn’t see the ground anymore through the tears welling in his eyes. His throat felt like it was clogged with cotton wool and there was no way he would be able to speak.

“Well, Phil?” Nico asked him, and he stepped closer, much to Phil’s dismay. “Are you gonna tell me to leave? That you don’t want me anymore? That you don’t love me anymore?”

Before Phil could stop himself, he was shaking his head no. It was like his body had a mind of it’s own, one that he couldn’t control or sway in the slightest. As soon as he heard the word ‘love’, it was like his body went on autopilot and he automatically wanted to scream at the top of his lungs how much he loved Nico, how much he wanted to be with him.

He turned to Dan, keeping his eyes low. “Can you let us have a minute?” he asked quietly, a tremor in his voice that shouldn’t have been there. What was he afraid of? Why was he afraid? It was just Nico. He just had to prove to Nico that he was good, that he was worth continuing to love.

“Are you sure that’s safe?” Dan murmured back, putting a soothing hand on Phil’s shoulder that Nico scoffed at. “I don’t want him to ruin you.”

Phil shrugged.

Too late, his mind whispered.

“I’ll be okay,” he said out loud.

For a moment, it didn’t look like Dan believed him. He studied Phil’s face carefully, intently, eyes soft but piercing. Phil refused to look at him, shoulders hunched forward, body curled inward, and he knew he didn’t look convincing, and yet, still, Dan finally sighed, and agreed with a short glare sent Nico’s way.

“I’ll just be in the other room,” Dan declared, watching Phil for another moment before he turned and made his way into the other room, leaving Phil alone with the love of his life and his worst enemy.

Phil was completely unsure of how to act around Nico now, like an empty shell, so he just stood, and he waited.

Chapter Fifteen

[hugee0715]

2017

JANUARY

I got my ear pierced just 2 days before the new year started and I was able to hide it from my mum for a few days. She was really against it, I told her I wanted to get a second hole, but she didn’t want to let me. She was saying how the only thing she can see in front of her eyes is my brother, years and years ago, getting piercings all over his face between two suicide attempts. She thought if I start, I’ll end up there too. And she cried for days when she found it out, already burying me inside her head.

FEBRUARY

This one, I took while walking home from the hospital after having to visit it again after more than a year. This is when I realized I was starting to have problems again. I was so jealous of all the people skating, it was in the morning on a weekday so it wasn’t busy at all and I just wished I had brought my ice skates with me. To make me happy, when everything has started to look really sad.

MARCH

Yaaay, first photo featuring me. Here, I haven’t really lost that much weight yet, but it was already getting there slowly. I remember, my old classmates made me go and visit our old school with them. This is a fancy changing room picture. We sneaked in, talking about all the memories we made. They still bring up how on the first day of 8th grade, as the new girl in class, I found a sock on the floor and simply threw it out of the window. At least the old times could make me laugh.

APRIL

A big portion of April was spent just inside my head, thinking about stuff I shouldn’t have thought about. The fact that I couldn’t control my mind made me lose all the control I had over my body. Everything made me have a physical reaction, the good and the bad as well. But how can you even call anything good if it makes you feel like dying.

MAY

May was the month I started to get really frustrated with myself. Everyone said I’d feel better by the time summer will be around the corner, but that wasn’t really the case. Even if I felt good for a moment, it wouldn’t last long and for the first time, I had the thought that maybe it all comes from my head.

JUNE

This is literally the only picture I took in the whole month of June. A tiny apricot I found on a tree while going on a walk. I went on a lot of those, I didn’t like how I felt when I was inside the house. Everything just cleaned out when I was outside, it calmed me down, it made me feel more sane. Being away from everything and everyone. I also started going to therapy and at first I enjoyed it, I was excited to see the effects of it. Little did I know it won’t have any. That I’d start losing weight so fast, the scale would show less and less with every passing day.

JULY

July, in all honesty, was maybe one of the worst months of all. No school to keep me busy, to distract me. Nothing at all. I had all the time in my hands. The weight losing slowed down after the rapid start, but it didn’t stop. I kept going on walks, trying to get as far as I could, where no one is around, where I could say everything I ever wanted out loud. I’d record myself and listen back to it. For some reason it helped me see how ridiculous I was. How my thoughts didn’t make sense. How pathetic sobbing about these things was. Only good thing I did? I came out. Purely out of desperation, I was keeping so many things in and I had to get some of it out. And saying that I’m gay was easier than that I have a problem.

AUGUST

Since I’m only using pictures that I took or were taken with my phone, no picture for August. I didn’t take a single one. I remember it was exceptionally hot, but I still spent a lot of time outside. I even had a nice tan by the end of the month. Things were bad, but as September came closer, I started to feel a bit better because I knew school would start, bringing a much needed routine back into my life.

SEPTEMBER

They say autumn brings death, but for me, it was what made me come back to life. I was at a concert with a friend, it was September 8th. I had school, I had people around me again and it took my mind off of a lot of things. But most importantly, the next day I messaged a girl. And 3 days later she messaged me back.

OCTOBER

The most exciting month of the year, maybe of my life. I had my mind blown, my feet swept out of under me and my heart melted. I spent hours upon hours talking to the girl I met in the previous month. Until she turned into my girl. It was a crazy experience, it was hard to believe that it was all happening. But what was even harder is believing the effects it had. No more derealization episodes, way less panic attacks, my appetite came back. Over all, I felt happy, I started to like mornings because I knew I’d have a message from her.

NOVEMBER

Second picture where I’m wearing this shirt, but I don’t care. She likes it anyway. 😉 It was a month of comfort, some peace finally. All the bad things slowly disappearing from my head. I just didn’t have time for them to pop up so they stopped trying. I felt so much love instead.

DECEMBER

Most recent times. Things just keep getting better. I gained some weight back, but most importantly, I stopped losing more. I feel happy, my mum says she can see how good of an effect Ileana has on me. And I’ve never seen her so involved, as soon as I look sad for a second, she asks whether we have some drama going on or not. A few months ago I would have never thought she would be like this, seeing me with a girl. Happy that I’m happy.

SO YEAH,

This has been a year, one with many downs, but a few very big highes. It will be one I’ll never forget. And I can only hope that this year will be as good as it is at the very beggining.

[graphicabyss]

Neverland Tour Reports III: Osaka, Nagoya

I think I was having a semi-withdrawal period so not as many in this part, but still some goodies. For proper reports to go news lj comm, I only do the parts about crossdressing, nipples and kisses.

2017.05.06 Osaka

MC starts

K: We are starting the MC so please take your seats!

T: Put down your cute butts! ~

K: Shut up! It’s not the 4 of us talking right now, people are listening!

T: Okay~ ♥ 

Audience: Kawaii~

K: Cute, right? Since he’s so cute I end up forgiving him.

K: You really need to cut it out!

T: What? Shige!

S: Even though Shige didn’t say anything.

T: Shige likes to stand there, by the stairs.

M: He does. He does, right. A random fact about Kato-kun.

T: He loves the spot in front of the stars. When it comes to Osaka, it’s Shige.

S: Don’t start the game of saying “Shige”.

T: Right, Shige?

S: Is it fun?

T: Saying “Shige” feels good.

M: Can I try saying it too?

T: Ok.

M: Shige. (in a cool voice)

S: Taka. (in a cool voice)

K: There aren’t many people who call you Taka, right?

T: That’s the vocalist of One OK Rock.

K: Stop bringing up One OK Rock! It’s better to get permission from Moriuchi.

T: Send him a mail, someone.

S: Send it yourself!

Tegomass sang the song from Pokemon, Shige joined in the middle.

M: Should we also sing the song from “Sailor Moon”?

T: When I was in kindergarten my mum played Tsukino Usagi.

S: Your mother? Isn’t that a little weird?

T: I was very happy!

K: Your mum did it?? Sailer Moon?

T: She did. She did the “In the name of the moon, I shall punish you!” Tegomama.

M: I’m sorry to Tegoshi’s mum, but please stop it. 

T: Really? (laughing)

K: But Tegoshi’s mama is pretty. So it would suit her.

S: That mother who wears no sleeves.

T: Every time before a concert my mum sends me a message “Do your best in Osaka!”

S: In my family we don’t do that. Though we do have a family LINE.

K: My sister does that a lot too. Sending me a picture like “I made this!” and I reply “Looks yummy!” What about you, Taka?

S: I have no idea what goes on in Taka’s family.

K: In Taka’s family there’s an older sister and Taka, right?

S: Do you meet?

M: We totally do. Father, mother, sister, 4 siblings.

K/S: 4 siblings?

M: Sorry, a family of 4.

S: When do you meet?

M: When? When we say “Everyone gather!”.

K: Wait, can it be this direct?

M: Yeah.

K: Really? I don’t get this family. Do you share texts? Like with your sister?

M: Not with my sister.

K: What about mother?

M: I do with mother and father but what do you even text your sister?

2017.05.07 Osaka, Day

T: Yesterday we all went to dinner, to a Japanese restaurant. Since next year NEWS will have 15th anniversary so we all shred our ideas about what we want to do for it.

S: When “Ayame” played the 3 of you lay down on stage.

T: But we like it!

S: Also yesterday when we went to dinner you kept teasing “I don’t need that, maybe I should eat”, “I don’t need that, maybe I should drink” [rephrased lyrics]. You even copied the choreography! Like “1,2,3,4″. This is too much!

K: That song is so handy.

T: You can use the lyrics in almost any situation. Isn’t that amazing? That’s how much we love Shige’s song!

M: You should write a song for us.

S: If I actually write it would you sing it?

M: If it’s good I would!

T: But that time we wrote “Ai no Kotoba”, me and Shige made a melody line in the hotel room.

S:  We created about 3 of them but in the end everyone picked the one Tegoshi came up with, they didn’t like mine.

K: That’s not true. I sense bitterness.

2017.05.07 Osaka, Eve

For Green Day (May 4th) Shige treated Koyama to sushi at a really cool restaurant (for his earlier birthday). After that they went to Koyama’s house. There on Koyama’s desk Shige wrote “Yaaay! This is Shige!”with a marker. Looks like defiling someone else’s property is commonplace in Johnny’s. Shige also wanted Koyama to see “Beauty and the Beast” so he bought a ticket for him though he couldn’t go himself because of Bibitto. Koyama said he didn’t get anything from Tegomass.

K: But the two of you didn’t get me anything.

T: Does it have to be an object?

L: What?

T: There are things you can’t see. Like love. (laughing)

S: You can see love, like kisses.  #katosantheshipper

T: That’s ok, but only on the lips.

S: Why does it have to be lips?

M: Koyama is sly. He says “With Massu it’s difficult so I’ll just make him buy me clothes”. 

K: It’s not like that.

M: So what do you want? For example.

K: I want stylish clothes from Massu. Come up with a full costume for me!

M: Full costume?

T: What about me?

K: You’re knowledgeable about wine and stuff so that would be good.

T: So alcohol is good.

K: Alcohol is good, also something all 4 of us could drink. 

T: What is this?

M: Tegoshi asked this before but do you want an object ?

T: Ah, I know. Would a gift certificate be good?

K: It’s convenient. Except there’s no love in it.

So I guess Koyama-san shall be taking the kisses.

2017.05.13 Nagoya

K: You slept a lot today, Kato-san? You seem lively.

S: Yesterday I wrote a manuscript and slept a lot!

Fans: Do your best!

S: Shut up! Shige is always doing his best!

T: I’ll tell you one secret about Koyama-san! 1,5 hours before the concert he did acupuncture to slim down his face. www

K: Wah! Don’t say it! (embarrassed) I did it after the rehearsal~

At DTF, Masuda-san pulled down Koyama’s robe from his shoulder to reveal his chest. Embarrassed, Koyama hid his nipple with his hand.

2017.05.14 Nagoya, Day

That’s the part where Shige lost his voice, I’m sure you know the gist of it already. He woke up realizing he lost his voice, he let the other fill in his parts at the rehearsal and by the time of the concert his voice got better so he tried his best. At the end of it, however, he couldn’t sing U R Not Alone and he cried, frustrated. Of course, the members supported him and Tegoshi asked the audience to help sing his parts. Anyway, just a few parts. 

S: My voice hasn’t recovered in time for the rehearsal so... the members sang instead of me and I got a bit teary-eyed.

K: Of course, NEWS help each other.

S: Just don’t sing better than me. ♥

They proceeded to discuss how their singing parts are assigned for a reason. Massu said that once at a Tegomass concert, they wanted to make a surprise and switch their parts of “Miso Soup”, but it proved to be a lot harder than they imagined, especially the parts where they have to sing together at different keys. So Massu said he realized it’s better if Shige sings his parts. “ [replacing] Koyama’s is fine though”. Brutal. Massu then talked how he sang “Koi wo Shiranai” at “Johnny’s World” and he said he messed up Shige’s part and felt very sorry about it. He even demonstrated exactly what happened there. 

At the end of Full Swing members were to put their hands on the shoulder of the person next to them and Massu was supposed to put his hand on Tegoshi’s shoulder but he stood too far so his hand slipped and grazed his chest. Then Massu tapped his finger against Tegoshi’s nipple. Tegoshi had a startled face until the next song started.

This band’s nipple fixation is no joke.

The day before they has a mid-tour wrapping up party with about 150 members of staff. They played “Intro quiz too.

2017.05.14 Nagoya, Eve

They took some questions from audience and one was what they do between concerts.

K: What do you do, Tegoshi?

T: I took a shower, put ice on my throat, stretched a bit, and after that it’ was just playing games on my phone.

S: He’s really a child! You can hear his voice “Yay! Die!” or “Woah! He’s strong!” He’s so noisy but with my voice now I can’t make fun of him.

T: Don’t say it! That’s embarrassing... (face turning red)

K: I also played games on my phone.

S: Lately Koyama-san plays games a lot, right? 

K: Popping candy.

T: That’s fun.

M: Like PuyoPuyo or Tetris?

K: Yes. When you arrange candy they disappear. I am 33 years old.

S: What’s with these two?

Massu then complained Shige is always blasting music on his speakers. Tegoshi added that when Shige is checking concert footage, he skips other members’ parts so it’s just Shige medley.

M: I was about to play some Western music through the speakers but not on WiFi, on Bluetooth. But when I turned it on, some weird music played! Tegoshi’s game music! Even Tegoshi’s Bluetooth is selfish.

T: I’m playing games that have world tournaments!

S: He’s watched some videos on YouTube and went “Worldwide (level) is cool!” Just go to your Neverland already!