#my mom is crazy enough as it is and im TERRIFIED she's going to slip further down the path of self destruction

[ourlordapollo]

.

[elysianslove]

first of all can i just say congrats on the 500 like i'm so happy for you and you absolutely deserve it (huge bear hug :) ) now i had this crazy hcs idea and i immediately thought of you so long story short how would Karasuno , Aoba Johsai and Nekoma react to their sweet manager having powers similar to those of scarlet witch (marvel) or mirajane strauss (fairytail anime) feel free to pick whichever one is easier and thank you so much for indulging my crazy request. love u lots - safiyah <3333

oh my goodness thank you sm for your words here’s a bear hug <3 also also i was literally just thinking just how cool it would be to have like a supernatural au haikyuu thing and then you send me this wow we on some mind reading shit. anyways i really hope you like this. sorry it’s like hq on crack if you want a serious one lemme know hsjkhsk

karasuno high

they lose their shit. 

every single one of them. 

mentally they’re all like 12 (except daichi and mqybe ennoshita) so i definitely think they’d have a very childish reaction to it. 

it’s so endearing though. 

they find out while walking you home one night: it’s very stormy and they just wanted to make sure you get home safe because they worship the ground you walk on. cue like a fucking billboard nearly falling on you and the group of boys and your instincts just kick in and you stop it mid air. 

noya’s still screaming even after everyone’s just gone silent and is gawking at the fact a billboard (or whatever the object is i can’t think rip) is hovering above them. in mid air. because of you. what the fuck? 

daichi’s blood pressure drops he’s like somebody catch me im about to faint wtf is going on. 

you kinda freak and just toss it away and run your way back home, as far away from the boys as possible. 

but alas, you’re their manager, and you have duties to fulfill. so you show up to practice the next morning terrified for your life. 

you’re not really sure why you’re so scared and nervous. you just are? it’s a huge part of who you are and it’d be a big bummer if the most important boys in your life didn’t accept it. 

noya greets you with a really big hug

tanaka’s so loud but what’s new <3 

daichi and suga just come up to you and gently ask if you’re okay because you ran off so quick yesterday

they all act super normal during practice but you can tell

you can tell

they want to ask so many questions they’re gonna explode 

after practice, when coach ukai and takeda leave, and it’s just you, kiyoko, and the boys, it’s s o quiet. you would hear a pin drop. 

you just sigh and go “you can ask” 

your poor eardrums </3 

they’re so fascinated by everything you say 

kiyoko’s like “i had a hunch” like how do u have a hunch about something like this anyways what a queen

noya’s like “make me fly” 

and tsukki in the back “drop him on his ass pls” 

they definitely make you do so many things for them with it 

cleaning duty is now on you because hello !! you can move things with your mind !! 

kags doesn’t get it. he’s like. ok? and ? i can set volleyballs perfectly, hinata can jump really high despite his height, she can move things with her mind? so what? 

i love him 

they’re also crazy good at keeping it a secret? 

not hinata tho he slips up so often like thank god the secret isn’t realistic or believable

he’ll be like “oh yeah? well our manager can move things with her mind!” 

and suga just has to usher him away with a pained smile like “yeah she’s so incredible haha” while doing that thing moms do where they squeeze or pinch your shoulder if they’re mad at you in public 

it feels like a weight lifted off your shoulders when they find out because the closer you grew to these boys, the more they felt like family to you.

aoba johsai

my favorite team 

i hc makki as someone that smokes weed. pls don’t try to convince me otherwise. look at him. he’s a pothead <3 

this is going somewhere i swear.

so you’re a 3rd year manager, meaning you’ve been with these boys a while now, specifically the third years of the team, so y’all are pretty close. 

how they find out: it’s like 3am on a weekend, the seijoh 4 and some of the second years. you’d baked a cake with like all of them all at once in the kitchen, so it was now a mess, so you’re attempting to clean it up as fast as you can the way you know best — with your hands and your mind. makki walks in, high as shit, sees this and just. 

“damn must be the weed.” 

you don’t hear him. so. uh oh. 

he was probably sent there by iwa to get water or something, so iwaizumi walks in and just yells so loud “what the fuck!” 

it’s like they’re all summoned by this. they eventually all pile into the kitchen and you’re literally just frozen in fear with pots and pans and utensils and specks of flour hovering by you. and then you maintain eye contact with iwa as you lift one hand and direct the pans into a cupboard and slowly shut it. 

“so it’s not the weed?” 

they honestly. don’t act any different tbh 

it’s like an added feature of yours that they appreciate. 

oikawa asks you to read his mind to test if what happened that night was real and you just lift him up from off his seat. 

“i asked you to read my mind tho hm” 

yeah mind reading is just a regular thing now. they will slyly ask you to read the other team’s minds during a match and you’re like no that’s cheating. but you do. and you subtlety give them advice. like “hm i wonder if that team’s gonna do this specific attack” 

also oikawa asks (read:begs) u to like help them make it through to nationals

you say “will it feel like a true accomplishment if i do?” 

shuts his pretty face up <3 

they also make you like. toss volleyballs to them. but with your mind. multiple of them. they take it as some stupid challenge idk these boys are dumb i love them 

they also love throwing things at. YOU. LIKE WTF? 

like haha dodgeball but it’s a group of 6’0+ athletes against just. you. 

sounds fair 

they also become insanely protective of you after they find out. idk how that clicks w them but. yes. 

especially mattsun and iwa ? like men. relax.

anyways they would abuse the shit out of your powers genuinely but it’s okay it’s out of love <3

nekoma high

they. they’re idiots. all of them. 

kuroo would probably be like but scientifically ! this makes zero sense 

omg kenma would lose his MIND. 

HES A GAMER BRUH 

HED BE OBSESSED W YOU.

but lowkey bc none of that simp shit </3 

ooou okay so you’re at a training camp and they sneak you in with them so you guys can play truth or dare 

bc yk. you’re kids. 

and y’all are going around and you just pick truth and someone asks what’s the biggest secret you’ve ever kept from us and they expect some dirty shit they’re nasty smh 

and then you straight up go “i can move things w my mind” 

and theyre like ok miss stop playin fr 

keep in mind it’s dark as hell in the dormitory and eerily quiet and you shift one of the chairs in there, and it squeaks loudly

yamamoto jumps and looks at you w so much fear in his eyes. “that wasn’t you” 

“bet?” 

and then suddenly all chairs are moving all at once and yamamato deadass screams 

kuroo’s shrugging like. “it’s just the wind,” like ur not in a closed off room w all the windows shut whatever u say sir <3 

lev’s like

gone into shock. seriously someone go get him water or something. 

when morning comes they’re all like hella scared to approach you except kenma and kuroo bc kenma— is in awe. kuroo — does not believe it. 

you’re kinda :( that they’re scared of you and you approach them after the day is over and just apologize, and tell them you didn’t mean to scare them and that you’d never hurt them or even consider it. 

they do a 180 bruh they just all go “awwwwww” and suffocate you in a group hug so you shove them all off for good measure lmao 

kuroo still doesn’t believe it until you save his ass in broad daylight and he’s like ok maybe it wasn’t fake so what sue me 

whenever there are training camps where other schools come they beg u to help them prank the boys 

especially bokuto and hinata 

and you do obviously 

it’s hilarious watching them scream as something moves slightly. you never do it that it’s suspicious just enough to be like did that happen or is my mind messing w me rn 

scarlet witch also has the ability to mess w people’s mind in the literal sense and whenever one of the boys pisses you off particularly you just make them see their biggest fear 

kenma asks you to reenact some of his favorite gameplays for him

it’s literally just roleplay and you couldn’t care less someone catches the two of you you’re no pussy you can admit when you’re having fun 

overall a very chaotic reaction 

they don’t treat you any different they’re just like 100x more hyped about who you are. like the fact that you’re their manager is already a blessing and now this !!! 

incredible <3333

[bcdrawsandwrites]

Here’s my next entry for @badthingshappenbingo! Just one prompt left after this!

I AM NO LONGER ACCEPTING PROMPTS! The single-bone marks on the card indicate which prompts I have received and am going to write, and I finally have prompts that will earn me a bingo once they’ve been posted (but they’re not posted yet)!

This fic has also been posted to FFN and AO3, so you can check it out on my Assortment of Broken Bones collection on there if you like!

This prompt was suggested by @actingwithportals! I went with a slightly different interpretation, since I don’t really want to hurt Miguel. XD; Hope you enjoy!

Prompt: Outnumbered in a Fight Characters: Miguel, Abel, Abuelita (post-movie, pre-epilogue)

---~~~---

"Abel?"

Miguel's cousin looked up from his textbook—he was studying for a big test, and Miguel hated to bother him, but he was pretty sure this was going to drive him crazy if he didn't ask for help. "Um... could you... help me with a computer thing?"

Abel made a face, tossing his textbook across the table. "Sure. Can't be worse than studying for history, I guess."

Grinning, Miguel hurried off to the living room where an old computer sat in the corner, a pair of more modern headphones hooked up to it. The latter was a very recent addition, purchased shortly after the music ban was lifted. Before then, their computer had no sound at all—the speakers had immediately been tossed as soon as they'd acquired it. Now that it was equipped with headphones, many of the Riveras had been taking advantage of it... which was the problem.

"Look at this," Miguel said, waving a hand at the monitor as he scrolled through Youtube.

Abel squinted at the monitor. "Okay... What am I looking at?"

"Look, it's all history videos... I think those are from Papá, and... and a few music things I like, but there's also..." Miguel made a face. "Makeup tutorials." He scrolled past several recommendations with particularly atrocious thumbnails—clearly things recommended to their Tía Gloria.

"Huh. So...?"

"Could you... show me how to sign up? So it can recommend me the things I want? I think I'm gonna go crazy if I have to see another makeup tutorial."

"That's all?" Laughing, Abel gently shoved Miguel away from the computer and took a seat. "Sure, if that's what you want. But uh..." He glanced around the family room—no one else was there at the moment. "Don't let anyone know I did this for you, all right? You're kinda slightly too young to sign up."

"Pff, just by a month," Miguel argued.

With that settled, he watched as Abel guided him through making an email address (Miguel chose the name "GuitarraYZapatos05"), and, through there, set him up with an account. "And... there," Abel said, slipping off the stool. "You're all done. Just log off whenever you're done."

"¡Gracias!" Miguel slid back onto the stool, and Abel left him to browse the site.

Eagerly he put the headphones on and typed a song into the search bar—he'd known how to navigate the website for some time now, even before the ban had lifted, thanks to his friends showing him videos on occasion when he visited their houses. It was a lot nicer to be able to do it whenever he wanted—looking up songs he'd heard in the plaza and watching videos of people playing them. It was a great way to learn to play the songs, since he'd taught himself to do it by sight. Not to mention, he was discovering a lot of new songs this way (though he sheepishly had to skip over songs every so often—ones he was pretty sure if Abuelita ever heard the lyrics to, she would re-ban music... or at least computers, anyway).

For a good hour or so Miguel listened to different songs, at first paying attention to the videos, and then simply losing himself to the music, shutting his eyes and letting the next videos autoplay. This worked out fine for a while, but then...

"What color is the sky, ay mi amor, ay mi amor!"

Miguel jumped back, nearly tipping backwards off his stool, headphones going askew as his heart hammered in his chest. Even then, he could still hear the familiar voice, and the face on the screen was...

It was a friendly looking face, singing on a stage in front of many adoring fans. Occasionally the man would stoop down to sing a particular line to a girl in the audience, who would swoon over him as he winked. But the last time Miguel saw that face, saw that person, he hadn't looked nearly so friendly.

You're not going anywhere!

He could still feel himself held up by the front of his shirt, yanked closer as the eyes of the man—the one who had once been his hero—glared poison into him.

I am the one who is willing to do what it takes to seize my moment... whatever it takes.

"The loco that you make me, it is just un poco crazy!"

The fact that both the terrifying skeleton in his memory and the friendly-looking man in the video were the same person made Miguel feel sick, panicked, and very, very angry. Frantically he clicked several times on the screen to get the video to pause, and scrolled away so he didn't have to look at the man's face anymore. He wrapped his arms around his stomach, shuddering, wishing he could make the memory go away. If anyone deserved to be forgotten, it was Ernesto de la Cruz.

Once the panicked pounding of his heart finally calmed, he looked back at the screen. At first he'd thought that he should sign off for now—that was certainly enough videos for the day, and he felt like playing the real versions of his Papá Héctor's songs so he could get Ernesto's voice out of his head. But then something caught his eye, something he hadn't been paying attention to until now:

OMG, I love Ernesto! he's so flirty here lol

73 people got a bell dropped on their head

this is my favorite DLC song! he has so many good ones though, what a legend

I still have this one on a record. Ernesto himself signed the sleeve! It's my prized possession.

Comments—hundreds of comments, nearly all of them praising Ernesto for his looks, for what a great person he was, for "his" songwriting talent. Miguel felt his face flush in anger as he read more and more of them, all of these people who thought that Ernesto was the songwriting genius, and not his Papá Héctor...!

A part of him recalled that it had only been a month since Dia de Muertos, and the word hadn't gotten out to everyone yet, but it didn't make him feel any less angry. Seeing all of these people praise the man who had killed his great-great-grandfather and then tried to kill him not once, but twice was unbearable.

Unable to stand all the positive comments directed at this man, Miguel quickly found where he could leave a comment of his own, and began typing (a slow process with one finger—he hadn't learned to type properly yet):

Ernesto is the worst musician!! He stole all his songs! Theyre not his! Hes not a real musician!!!

Still fuming, he hit the reply button, and sat back on his stool. One comment probably wouldn't do a whole lot against the hundreds of people fawning over Ernesto here, but he'd thought it might make him feel better to say something.

A notification popped up at the bottom of his screen—someone had... replied to his comment?

Lol, what? Chill out. I'm sorry you don't like the greatest musician of all time.

What? No, that wasn't...! Frustrated, Miguel typed up another reply: Hes not!!! Hes a fraud!!! Hes not a real musician at all!

To his surprise, even more comments came in, this time from several people within moments of each other:

sure, Ernesto is a fraud, just like Elvis, right?

you!!! need to use more!!!! exclamation points!!!!!!

lmfao did you create this account just to troll a DLC video uploaded 7 years ago?

Great, now everyone was making fun of him... but it wasn't funny—Ernesto really did steal all of his songs, and... He shook his head—this wasn't fair. He typed up another reply to the thread (making sure to use fewer exclamation points, if they were going to make fun of him for it): Im telling the truth! He stole all his music from my greatgreat grandpa. He wrote all the songs Ernesto sang including this one.

OMG. OMGGGGG.

no actually dcl is my great great uncle and he told me hmself he wrote all these songs and that if I ever met youtube user ""guitarrayzapatos05" i should tell him that he screwed ur mom

Guys I think this is a kid......

Geez I always hear people say they're related to DLC (wouldn't be surprised, the man supposedly slept around like a rabbit) but this is the first I've heard someone say he stole from their relative. We've got a new nutjob conspiracy theory, fellas.

Adsfjsdflasjfsda;lfjlsajslfdjlds;adj

Miguel wasn't entirely sure what some of this stuff meant, but he did know all these people were mocking him, and with every new reply he felt the anger build in his chest, though his cheeks also felt hot with embarrassment—why was everyone ganging up on him like this? Your all making fun of me! But Im telling the truth!! Ernesto is a bad person and a bad musician! He really did steal from my greatgerat Grandpa!!

He stole from my greatgerat Grandpa too.

Lol how long do you plan to keep this up kid?

Listen, if DLC really did steal his music, we would have heard about it by now. He died almost a century ago. You don't think people haven't looked into this?

he ded 75 years ago moron

omg do u ever shut up

At least one person was being civil with him, but even then they were wrong. Still, Miguel had no idea what to say—his family was still fighting to get this case to the news, but with Mamá Coco having recently passed and his baby sister nearly here, they hadn't had a lot of time to work on it. But maybe he could bring something else up. He typed as fast as he could, tears stinging at the corners of his eyes:

I know he stole it! I found out when I went to the Land of the Dea—

The screen went dark.

Miguel sat there for a moment, stunned, before he heard a slobbery chomping noise coming from beneath the desk. Looking down, he spotted a familiar tail poking out near his stool. "Dante!" he cried, hopping down to yank the dog away.

As he suspected, the power cord was in the dog's mouth, and he was chewing on it lazily.

He was normally used to Dante getting in the way of things, but he felt angrier than normal at the dog. "No! No! Bad dog!" he cried, and swatted Dante on the nose.

The dog whined, immediately dropping the cord and squirming away from Miguel's grasp.

"S-stupid dog, wha'd you do that for? I was just trying to tell them about—!"

"What's going on in here?"

Both Miguel and Dante turned around to see Abuelita hurrying into the room. "I-it's nothing, Abuelita," Miguel said, and frantically wiped at his face.

Abuelita crossed her arms, looking from Miguel, to Dante, to the computer. "Nothing, huh! Is that computer box giving you trouble?"

"I—no, it's... it's not that..." He winced as Dante licked at his face and pushed him away.

"Don't give me that. It must be something, if it's got you so upset."

Abel's voice came from the hallway: "Ummm... did something happen?" Stepping into the room, he blinked at the monitor. "Huh, why's it—WOAH!" Quickly he got down on his hands and knees, grabbing the partially-chewed power cord and plugging it back in. Hitting the "on" button on the machine, he heaved a sigh of relief when the computer began to boot up again. "Geez, I thought you'd broken it."

"Oh, is that all?" Abuelita chuckled. "See, it's fine, mijo."

Dante looked up at the computer and barked at it, and Miguel frowned, using the stool to push himself back up to his feet. He rubbed the heel of his hand into his eyes. "Yeah, I... guess."

"Wait... what did you do on there?" Abel asked, suddenly worried. He quickly glanced from Abuelita and back to Miguel, biting his lip.

Sighing, Miguel, wrapped his arms around himself. "I just... saw some dumb people talking... about de la Cruz," he mumbled.

"Ugh, that man?" Abuelita said, shaking her head. Miguel wondered if she realized she said it in the exact same way she used to refer to Papá Héctor.

"People talking about... oooh, you read the comments, didn't you?" Abel asked, and laughed. "Never read the comments, Miguel!"

Feeling his chest constrict, Miguel balled his hands into fists and held them at his side, glaring at his primo. "It's not that! They were—they were talking about how great de la Cruz was, and—and when I told them he wasn't great, he was a thief, they... they just made fun of me!"

"¡¿Qué?!" Abuelita shouted, then shot an accusatory glare at the monitor. "I will not have people mocking my grandson! Where are they?"

"No, no, Abuelita, it's not like that." For a moment it looked like Abel would laugh again, but he saw how serious Miguel was about this, and frowned. "Well... they don't know yet, Miguel."

"But I tried to tell them!" Miguel swung out his hands, and Dante whimpered, butting his head against Miguel's leg. "I—I tried to tell them that they were wrong, but they just... kept making fun of me. And there were so many of them! I just..." Finally he brought his arms down, grasping his right wrist in his left hand and staring down at the floor. "I just felt like I was all alone."

Feeling his Abuelita's arm wrap around his shoulders, Miguel looked up to see her looking at him seriously. "You're not alone, mijo," she said. "Every single one of us here in this family are standing right behind you. We know the truth about Papá Héctor and that man now, and we won't stop fighting until the whole world knows."

"Y... you mean it?" he asked, hope creeping into his heart again.

"Absolutely. He is family, and we won't give up on him."

A huge smile spread across his face as he wrapped both arms around his abuelita, hugging her. "Gracias, Abuelita."

Laughing, Abuelita returned his hug with a bone-crushing one of her own, squeezing around his back until he was left gasping for air. "Now go have fun, mijo, and don't worry about what the people on that computer box say. They'll understand soon enough!" With that, she happily walked back toward the kitchen to start on dinner, leaving Miguel and his cousin alone.

Abel shifted on his feet, glancing from the computer to Miguel before giving an awkward laugh. "I, uh... know we went through the trouble of setting up a Youtube account for you, but uh... maybe you should stick to Spotify."

[slcters]

 「 avan jogia. cismale. he/him. 」i hope that #lexsquad member「 SLATER MALIH SAVALIA 」adds me to the squad ! the 「 TWENTY THREE 」year old 「 LAW 」 major has been apart of the squad since 「 OCTOBER 2018」and seems to be the 「 DELPHIC 」of the group.「 SLATER」is a「 SENIOR」 and seems to enjoy 「 WRITING & PLAYING MUSIC 」but you can always find them at a squad party , too !

TW:  CHEATING, ABANDONMENT, PORN MENTION, DEATH, DRUGS

Anyways lemme give you some info about my man and try to keep it as short ( I lied ) as possible I’ll have some wanted connections at the end so hit me up to plot cause I live for that :) 

NAME: SLATER MALIH SAVALIA AGE: 23 MAJOR: PRE- LAW SENIOR @ LEX POSITION: A DADDY HOBBIES: givin 0 Fucks, living life to the full, writing, being an PI on his dad, spiting his family n causing problems as a FUCK U. BORN: LONDON, ENGLAND. SEXUALITY: A truE WILD BISEXUAL :”)

BACKGROUND: 

So Slater was born in London, England however when he was younger he moved around a lot with his parents until they settled in LA. Mainly for his dads business and his mum had previously lived there too.

His mum was a travel writer which explains why they traveled a lot, his father runs a few escort agencies + brothels ( nevada only we do it legal here )  and also started up his own pornographic production company / film studio in LA. it would probably now be one of the biggest in the world.  ( think vivid entertainment meets brazzers ) u know FILTHY RICH SHIT.

Both his parents were obviously away quite a lot, his dad ran so many businesses and hmm was hands-on lets say but the household was pretty calm when he was fairly young. his mum was super attentive and loving and just such an amazing role model and always wanted to take him with her to show him the world when she had to leave. i think he definitely was a mummas boy.

at about 8/9 however would’ve been when things kind of came crashing down for him. he really caught his dad cheating on his mum w/ one of the porn stars he hired from the studio. His dad would’ve really asked him NOT to tell him mum because it would break their family up. obviously, slater was like terrified of the chance of losing his family so he just pretended nothing ever happened.

he was so conflicted because he was keeping this huge secret and he had so much guilt but he didn’t wanna be the one to ruin things. Like his dad basically used him as a cover like expecting him to lie for him for a long time. it would’ve really eaten away at him. like it would’ve not been a one-time thing, but slater was in denial for sure.

i think one day slater would’ve slipped up in one of his lies for his dad and his mum ended up fighting out what happened and it was such a mess. it would've led to their divorce and god that was.. SOO messy. they defs didnt have a prenup and like the custody.

I think lowkey he was miserable being with his dad, he had so much resentment and sadness there. he would’ve been okay being with his mum the whole time.

His dad was really the type of parent that would use his kids against each his ex wife like they would use slater to pass on messages and being like no u can’t have him for that day etc etc And not taken slater into consideration.

his dad though really tried his absolute best to bring his mum down which was sooo sad to see, like watching her get put through the ringer by his dad and she just became a bit of a shell of who she was, because he obviously had more than enough money to do it and didn’t want her to see a dime of it even tho he.. RLLY BE LIVING THE HIGH LIFE.

slater would’ve just been back and forth between them both up until he was about 15 when his mum, unfortunately, passed away due to drugs. which was SO UNEXPECTED.  i think there was definitely a lot more to it, like she definitely was self-medicating to help go through the still pending divorce. which would’ve lasted years. 

anyways losing his mum devastated slater because truly she was like a best friend to him, she was. he always enjoyed the weeks at his mums more than his dad and now he knew he’d be stuck there.

he fights a lot with his dad still about everything that happened and what he did, he blames him for it and putting a LITERAL KID in the middle.

anyways though since the separation his dad had like a myriad of “ girlfriends” around who were probably all young enough to be like a step sibling tbh. he never took to any of them until his stepmom. who shockingly he actually really likes. shes one thing keeping his family together atm.

 Anyways as you can imagine slaters dads business was huge and his dad is truly raking in the money but slater has always felt uncomfortable spending or even benefiting off it which is why he’s extremely secretive considering he knows where it comes from and he doesn’t exactly support his dad let alone he doesn’t want to have to explain that to people and get them looking into his family.

his father has really tried and put up this front though as if he’s a huge family man now and is conservative and super religious and smh that pissed off slater to the max. he’s like that dont make no fucking sense..

 when he high school hit though they were going to country clubs all that shit slater hated basically. he truly didn’t mind acting out just to spite his dad knowing hey your a family man what are you gonna do about it??

this drove his dad so crazy and only meant more rules were put on him, it was about the only attention his dad gave him.

when hey fight though its really wild, you know slater throws it in his dads face basically just some fucking pimp and exploits people and he’s never gonna do that and he’d rather have nothing than follow in his footsteps

i think his dad has been fined multiple times for some shady shit going on in his businesses. plus its been common knowledge in the depths of the industry they heavily provide them w/ alcohol drugs etc. probably has had an issue with the treatment of the people hes hired. lawsuits.  there's more under the surface that even slater doesnt know.

there would’ve been a bit of a scandal where his dad employed one of his dumbass country club friends daughters aka someone even slater knew to star in one of his adult films

 but regardless like he knew he really was fortunate he lived an extremely privileged life, like he would be set for life, could sit do nothing and its good. he just never had a huge interest in it unlike his father who really always said that he would take over everything someday and it would turn into a huge family business. and he was like yikes someone come tell him.. no thanks. 

 His dad and him definitely had a rocky relationship after his moms death, he  didn’t parent very much and just left his stepmom in so many uncomfortable situations but honestly

 He saw her more as a friend though then a mum but she was the best parental figure he’s ever even had. She’d genuinely try so hard to make sure his dad was acting like one like telling him he’s going to his sons gigs or else even though slater knew his dad would come for 2 seconds to appease his wife then leave.

But growing up he’s always been super careful of who’s around him and who he lets into his life probably as a result of how secretive his family has always instilled in him to be.

 Like his dad keeps saying we’re family we come first, and he never wanted slater to be sharing that with people about what they did.

 But he has such a resentment to his dad, like he thinks he’s a mess he has a wife he doesn’t give a fuck about a son he doesn’t see, he does god knows what he just is so convinced he can’t turn out like him ever. 

I think people genuinely think he must not come from money because the amount of people who have ever met his parents or seen his house is a handful if that. 

Like he’s always hanging out at other people’s places and just he’s never been really extravagant unless its to purposely spite his dad yikes. that comes from anger.

Like he really got himself a job even though his dad said he could come work for him just cause he was like yeah I don’t want to run ur dumb company and make money off it u pos? 

His dad has definitely been investigated a few times for shady practices. slater definitely started looking into law for that reason, like he genuinely thought he wants to actually be able to put guys who screw the system and own huge corporations and think they can pay outta anything in jail.

meanwhile his dad thought great a lawyer who can defend our family business smh so he supports him He has no clue slater would rather take him down.

hes on the dl investigating his dad himself. who wanna help.

PERSONALITY

losing his mom AND one his best friends showed him that he needs to really do everything he wants to and in that moment which does make him selfish at times 

i think he has abandonment issues, i think like when  his best friend who was kinda the reason he came to lex, happened to pass away also triggered that again ( TBD WHY im leaving this open for plots ) and that really shook him all over.

he really almost feels cursed at this stage.

he was pretty sheltered tbh because his dad wasn’t trusting AT ALL and at first was homeschooled until High school so he didn’t exactly grow up outgoing or being able to have many people at his place or tell them about his life.

i think theres not many people who know he’s related to his dad business, even tho his dad business iS HUGE and legit is his last name. and hes like yeah ha coincidence right??? not my dad at all.

He’s super fucking blunt though like he may be secretive with his personal life but his ass does not hold back which has gotten him into way too many problems. 

He just feels like he grew up lying about so much, his dad was like we don't want people taking advantage of you if they find out who you are and use things against me.

 he hated that and all the secrets about his dad he kept so don’t expect him to hold back on feelings or thoughts back at all 

LOVES to spite and piss his dad off even if that means 30+ students at his dads place during a business meeting lets do it.

He acts a lot without thinking like he sucks at planning anything and a lot of time he seems a little flighty and that he doesn’t take things serious enough esp his relationships

.He’d really go above and beyond though for anyone who’s proven to him that they can be trusted like he’s been known to be all in he either gives it everything or nothing so he goes extravagant

will try everything once.

wild child tm.

 his ass was kinda like living it up. he’s like on the brink of i dont want to just use my dads money but he’s like if i am though i wanna use it to actually do something decent, like get a law degree and be something, travel like his mum did. hes obsessed with the thought of like following in her footsteps BUT HE. NEVER ADMITS IT.

feelings who are u?

 He’s definitely a realist and a little bit cynical too, like he’s seen way too much shit to really have some ideal look on life. 

He doesn’t believe in some fairytale or things just happen for a reason or really in fate or anything like that. 

Like he doesn’t think love fixes everything and someone can be your happiness at all . hes like clearly its only problems so.

He’s only ever really had one serious relationship and a bunch of other casual things but that was just nothing to him

 He’s not closed off to them but he picks and chooses what he gives, but he’s just doubtful how someone’s gonna mix well into his life 

He definitely seems aloof and a bit cold but I mean after a drink and 5 minutes he’ll be picking your brain on just about anything 

loves writing in general, usually lyrics and music though.

secretly Loves a good midnight dnm overlooking the water with a trusted friend

 Awesome at getting himself out of situations he can be pretty convincing lbr

lowkey has abandonment issues. 

connections: donnt say im trash i know.

extra drama - his STEP sibling. aka child of his step mom. 

his best friends sibling, aka the one who passed away :”(

someone whose mum dated his dad WILD.

A TABOO FLING OR CRUSH, basically he got with someone he shouldn’t of, we can decide reasons HOWEVER I’D LOVE if the other chara was the ex of his friend who passed away. HED FEEL LIKE SHIT for having feelings. the angst. and the we cant do this its wrong.

I mean... someone who actually WORKS FOR HIS DAD. i would die, could be an escort, a sex worker, someone who is signed to his dads production company, can be a pornstar or more like a cam star too.

someone who is a huge tease and rlly makes his ass beg to be with them. make him work for it honey.

ooo a really GOOOOD friend and they’ve always been “ platonic” but theres this weird sexual tension and they both know it, but like ooo it could risk the frienndship n makee it weird and like ugh.

like someone whose parents hates them hanging around w/ slater bc of his family, maybe bc they ran in the same circles from back home but they just.. cant stay away from each other.

someone hes kinda dated but they realised we’d be better off as friends even tho weve seenn each other naked, it was fun.

One of the people from back home that found out all about his entire family when the scandal was exposed. They could’ve been friends or enemies.

AN ex!! pls he defs has broken some hearts or THE ONE WHO BROKE HIS :) IF U DO THIS U WILL GET SO MUCH LOVE

An enemy Maybe someone against his family or someone he just can’t stand!

THE damn girl his fucking dad tried to employ to be in his damn movie! My ass would do wild shit for this one wild WILD SHIT.

unrequited love, someone's heart he broke without even realising it

A confidant someone he can really confide in tell-all his dumbass shit too, like his protective ass would really care for this person

Someone who’s into music as much as him pLS!! like someone who can just jam with him late nights

He needs that dnm kinda friend 😂

A fwb that’s self explanatory:)

RIDE OR DIES etc

CHILDHOOD FRIENDS.

ANYTHING IM SOOO OPEN FOR PLOTTING

[freebooter4ever]

my dad group texted my brother and i, highly unusual, and i think jordan was weirded out too cause his response was equally short and confused. on the list of things my little brother and i have never discussed, our dad’s relative interest or lack there of in our lives is pretty high. dad’s been messaging me since october, asking about stuff like where my next living plans are (which he has never done since i first moved out age eighteen), and i’ve only been vaguely responding to the point blank questions cause its just. so. weird. i think my grandpa’s death has shaken dad’s worldview a bit more than he’s been letting on.

he alienated my brother and i pretty much immediately after his secretive marriage to the bottle blonde rich bitch when i was 22. he kicked my brother out as soon as jordan turned 18, and when i discovered this by coming home one summer and seeing jordan wasnt in the house, i got so fucking mad that it was the first time i ever had a full out screaming match at my dad. and apparently this display of anger was when rich bitch decided she didn’t like me (probably valid, but also ironic because pretty much from birth it was known in my entire extended family that dad and i were almost identical personality wise, and both of us have tempers where we will not get mad at anything but frustration will build up and up until on the rare blue moon it boils over, and oh boy. watch out. those moments were the only times i was ever scared of my dad as a kid and i think it only happened twice in my entire life)(if she thinks im crazy when im angry, she should see my dad)

but i was crazy mad because while i was lucky enough to be put in therapy due to attempting to starve myself into non existence at age 13 (many many sessions of ‘family’ therapy with me in the center of a long couch silently trying to pretend i was invisible and my mom two feet away at one end and dad on the opposite end of the couch, and my mom doing all the talking, ranting and raving about how im starving myself to punish her. and then the therapist kicking both my parents out and trying to convince me to say a few words, and her finally getting me to realize that how my mom treated me was not normal and not something i needed to put up with if it made me sad and scared, and then the therapist realizing that i was still too sad and scared to confront it, and her and i coming up with a compromise where we would tell my mom that i was just ‘really attached’ to dad’s house and it wasnt that i was terrified of living with my mom or liked my dad better, it was that i just really liked living in one place instead of out of a suitcase and moving every week), and so had both the therapist and my dad supporting me when at fourteen i finally said enough was enough and demanded that my dad get full custody so i didnt have to spend every other week with my abusive mother anymore - while i got out of that situation, my brother didnt. i tried, he knew that it was my decision to live full time with dad and i made it clear he could do the same, but just as it was a given that i was identical to dad’s personality, my brother was identical to mom’s so i think he was more attached to her than i was. either way, he always refused and insisted on continuing to live between both of them. after i hit driving age, my dad transferred responsibility to me for shuttling my brother to and from my dad’s house to my mom’s apartment. dad’d lock himself in his room, or go to the gym, and i’d turn on an endless rotation of star wars movies for jordan and i to watch before i had to take him to his next week’s place (phantom menace was our favorite cause darth maul was just cool ok, dont judge).

anyway, the last day i ever stayed at my moms house, my brother was there. and i must have been twenty or twenty one because he would have only been around seventeen. but even at seventeen he was well over six foot five cause he got all the height in the family which was totally not fair but thats besides the point. so while i was there my mom flew into one of her alcohol induced rages, and took it all out on my brother. i had intellectually figured that all the anger my mom used to take out on me had then transferred to my brother once i stopped living there every other week, but up until that point i hadn’t actually seen it. she started shoving him, and punching him, and not enough so it would hurt much, because as i said he was well over six feet and she was barely five six, so he could pretty well block any thing she dished out. but he was cornered, and he looked scared. and i was hiding useless on the stairwell, crying, and begging mom to stop. and it only stopped cause jordan managed to slip out the front door and once he escaped mom went back into the kitchen, still yelling and angry. and i took the chance to grab my school bag and leave in solidarity. and my brother and i stood there awkwardly on the porch, me still crying, and him smoking and trying to look cool and not like he just got chased out of the apartment by a woman half his size. and i promised him we wouldnt go back until she calmed down, and that she was being unreasonable and he didnt deserve any of it, and id figure out somewhere to go. and we started walking down the sidewalk, but not together because we were never that close. he wandered off somewhere to smoke. and that’s as far as i remember.

this day came up in conversation with my grandma in the months after grandpa’s death, during one of our many three am can’t sleep conversations in grandma’s kitchen (grandma would wake up, i’d hear her get out of bed and wake up too. she’d make herself tea and eat some graham crackers and we’d sit together at the table feeling the third empty chair like an ache). grandma brought it up, because apparently, even though i cant remember this at all, i had my no/kia brick phone in my school bag (a minor miracle because i hated carrying around cell phones for the longest time), and i actually called grandma. and grandpa and her came to pick me up, and they found me sitting on a wall a block away from my mom’s apartment, and then we drove around till we found jordan, and then we all went back to my grandparent’s house. after bringing this up, grandma then, completely unprompted, told me something that child me thought about regularly - she said that even though her mom died when she was 8, leaving her to help raise her two younger siblings, grandma thought in some ways it was easier than what my brother and i went through with the divorce and my mom leaving. i used to regularly - not wish my mom dead, exactly - but wish i could pretend she was dead, rather than her just not being there anymore. especially since, when i was suddenly thrown into being her sole emotional and physical punching bag now that dad wasn’t filling the role anymore, a lot of the times being around her post divorce was not a good thing. (I cut off all contact with my mom finally at age 25 and haven’t looked back)

so yeah, i was fucking pissed that i had worked so hard to try to mitigate the damage i caused by leaving jordan alone with my mom for pretty much the entirety of my high school years...only to have my dad kick him out barely a few years after i left for college and thus putting my brother at my mom’s mercy. ostensibly my dad kicked my brother out because of his drug addictions, but my brother was the most mild mannered addict i’ve ever known. the worst thing he ever did was steal a couple hundred dollars from me, but he never got violent, he never got angry. other people got angry at him. my aunt once tried to fight him in a hospital elevator because he sold my cousin heroin or meth or some shit and my cousin ended up impaling a knife in his chest in front of my grandma, which is a whole nother story. but jordan was only nineteen when that happened. my cousin? thirty six. and a long time violent and angry drug addict with a record (he threw a book at his professor’s head and got kicked out of grad school while on cocaine once, which is how he ended up back in washington state and needing a new drug dealer - hence my brother suddenly getting involved) (same cousin later flew into a drug fueled rage in his forties and almost beat his girlfriend to death) (my brother was long since clean by then and had nothing to do with our cousin getting drugs at that point)

all this to say my dad’s rich bitch new wife didn’t think a drug addict and mentally ill artist fit into her picture perfect family, so dad started making it clear we were not welcome at family functions unless we complied with very strict rules. ironically, jordan was let back into the fold first partially because i can hold a grudge for a very long time and i was very very terrified of my mom and dad was the sane stable one and i had trusted him to take care of everything even without me there and dad had failed pretty spectacularly at that. im still bitter at my dad for his secret marriage and subsequent moving into her million dollar mansion and throwing my brother out. but also partially because jordan started following all of dad’s rules, got himself cleaned up (he moved in with his girlfriend, and i think being out of mom’s house had a lot to do with getting over his addictions), started studying computer science, found a really good software engineering job, suddenly dad approved of him. i also partially antagonized rich bitch wife by doing silly things like wearing black leather pants and the most provocative clothes i owned whenever i went over to their house. rich bitch was a very simple narrow minded person with a lot of prejudices. i imagine i was not seen as a good influence on her two younger daughters. and eventually they stopped seeing me altogether. even when i was living in washington for all of 2017 - the only time i ever saw dad was when he’d come visit my grandparents alone. the day before i took grandma on the train to move to ohio, we were supposed to all have dinner together at our family’s favorite place to eat out - crossroads mall - and the rich bitch refused to show up. that’s how petty she is. she also is so dumb she’s under the delusion that kids get into drugs if they don’t have dogs (????) so that’s why she forced my dad to get a dog for her spoiled brat youngest when the girl went into high school. my dad dislikes animals, so i will say one of the highlights of this marriage is seeing my dad become a dog person. the rich bitch and her daughters mostly ignore the dog, but my dad is so attached to max that he even lets the little puppy sit in his lap while driving. anyway, anyone who thinks dogs are the sole answer to preventing drug addictions can go to hell.

yeah, blah blah blah, to sum up its WEIRD for my dad to suddenly be texting my brother and i unprompted, and asking me about my life and my plans. i dont really know how to deal. i miss him. he was always the closest person in my life to the point where even when i moved away for college, i still assumed after i graduated i’d just move back in with dad so it was only four years being gone, cause why would i ever want to live anywhere else?. i kept thinking if i could hit some level of success that he would approve of, that maybe eventually i could become somebody his rich bitch wife would associate with. but that never happened, obviously. 

[tarmairons]

re: that last hp ask i got

i know i said i wouldn’t be cross-posting my bellamort/dark au/riddle fam headcanons from twitter but i’ve decided to post a lengthy updated masterpost here after all so ENJOY bon apetit 

1. see the thing is that 90% of my hcs can’t be described with words bc they’re just.. feelings.. aesthetics.. vibes.. vague scenarios that make me feel some sort of way… the dark au has a certain Feel and i just stick a bunch of domestic concepts in there and shake it all up and that’s it shshsh

2. disclaimer: im like 75% sure my self indulgent ramblings won’t make sense so sorry about that

3. i was fully serious that one time i said on twitter that voldemort’s no.1 priority after taking over the wizarding world was doing sth about his snace (snake face) so yeah. first things first he’s not as fugly in the dark au. as mentioned previously he just looks like mr. ralph and probably wears ornate haute couture power suits

4. the public doesn’t actually know who the augurey is for YEARS… they know whoever it is is voldemort’s second in command and sure there’s rumors that he has an heir but nobody knows it’s delphi. this way she doesn’t have to be reclusive and hide away, she just lives her life, studies and trains, masters the art of dark magic, hangs around town etc, and no one suspects anything bc who would think this tiny super friendly innocent looking girl is the dark lord’s kid — her identity isn’t revealed until she’s deemed Ready to publicly take up her position. and when she is revealed it’s a Big Moment bc she’s a drama queen and lives for attention

5. delphi is taller than bellatrix

6. speaking of bellatrix. she’s presumed dead after the battle of hogwarts which turns out to be a cool bonus for the dark side. any leftover resistance? she’ll take care of that and they’ll never see her coming. tbh this seems a lot cooler in my head bc movie bellatrix would not be stealthy enough to stay hidden for years she would probs trip over something and accidentally commit arson within a few days. but yeah sneaky assassin sounds sexy. plus to be super honest i imagine bella is a teensy bit more collected than in the films... no shade at helena y’all know i would die for her but there are in fact things i would change about her bella. so yeah for a while the only people who know she’s alive aside from her immediate family are probs rod and the malfoys

7. hm so. the malfoys…. much to think about. narcissa did lie to voldemort’s face during the battle so logically he should have killed her the moment he realized she knew harry was alive all along. but this is a soft dark au so let’s pretend bellatrix was like hey dude don’t kill my sister maybe and voldemort was like k. i mean no harm done, harry potter is properly dead in this universe after all

8. but seriously tho. the only reason voldemort didn’t yeet narcissa into a wall was for bella’s sake. he’s nice like that, he probably promised her at one point that he wouldn’t violently murder her family. peak romance

9. delphi is surprisingly close with both her parents although with voldemort it’s more of a mentor-student relationship than a parent-child one bc he’s Like That. growing up it was always bella who insisted they treat delphi more like a child and less like a weapon and voldemort wasn’t always happy about that bc he’s emotionally constipated and also never had a childhood. also he’s, like, evil. so yes, reminding voldemort that delphi was her daughter too sometimes got bella in trouble bc we all know of voldemort’s superiority issues. but no bella didn’t stop insisting that delphi deserved an actual childhood and in the end they compromised like functional adults and delphi turned out pretty well for someone raised by 2 of the most terrifying people alive

10. but yeah that’s not to say voldemort and kid delphi never had soft moments. they did. he even picked her up every once in a while. everyone was surprised, bella most of all. she probably cried in the bathroom later bc the softness overwhelmed her. i’m not sure if i mean that in a sarcastic shitpost kind of way or if she was really moved to tears. y’all decide for yourselves

11. delphi looks very very much like bella but she has tom riddley eyes.. so dark they’re nearly black. and soulless. maybe they even flash red when she’s enraged. and she has very aristocratic very controlled tom riddley mannerisms. it’s not until you piss her off and she goes off the rails that the bella side of her personality kicks in

12. delphi gets along really well with the malfoys (except lucius. she thinks he’s pathetic and likes to tease him. in a friendly way but it’s still harsh. she gets that from her mom) esp scorp. scorp thinks this makes him cool at school bc he gets to fist bump the augurey and not get murdered for it

13. speaking of hogwarts. umbridge is scared shitless of delphi and it’s always a school-wide spectacle when the augurey drops by unexpectedly on official business and umbridge starts stuttering and quivering. scorp sometimes makes a point to approach umbridge and delphi when they’re talking and act all chummy-chummy with his cousin just to make himself look powerful and Cool in front of umbridge and the other students

14. i still don’t know whether voldemort would call delphi ‘delphini’ or just ‘delphi’… i imagine he’s a strict stick-up-his-ass kinda father but who knows. he does call bellatrix ‘bella’ but that’s different i guess

15. but THEN AGAIN he does have a gigantic soft spot for delphi too. maybe he slips up every so often and calls her delphi. i’m literally making this shit up as i go along i’m just smashing my mf keyboard and occasionally glancing at my messy hcs notebook. I TOLD YALL i don’t have solid hcs i just have VIBES and AESTHETICS. the only way you’ll get specific hcs out of me is if you ask very specific questions

16. weirdest brotp is delphi and rodolphus. nobody knows where that came from but they get along so well and it confuses everybody

17. we been knew that bella is batshit crazy and criminally insane or whatever but against all odds she is a surprisingly good mother. she’s always been soft for family (narcissa etc) so it makes sense that she would legit die for delphi. they have this super casual bantery relationship YALL GET ME bella is so proud of delphi she’s literally that “my little baby off to destroy people” meme!!! honestly mother-daughter relationships are my goddamn weakness i would die for the two of them

18. delphi has a gf (underdeveloped oc time!) who, for the longest time, doesn’t know who she is dating bc delphi is obviously not allowed to say. she finds out the truth eventually and she is properly freaked out for a very very long time. and since all of these hcs are stupidly soft we’re just gonna keep making them softer: the gf is terrified of delphi’s parents at first (obvs) but they’re both extremely fond of her (well, bella is, voldemort probs doesn’t care all that much about who delphi is dating so long as she’s not of subpar blood status or secretly spying for the opposition ya know. as long as delphi trusts her he does too)

19. no but really voldemort trusts delphi and bella implicitly. with delphi it’s bc he raised her and he trusts her to be loyal bc she knows no other way, she was meant to be an extension of his power etc. but with bella it’s something he learns over time, to trust her judgement bc despite her many many flaws she’s very perceptive and usually right

20. voldemort probably makes more horcruxes. still haven’t decided how this ties in with the fact that he’s now safely immortal again and neither delphi nor bella are. who knows maybe they all do the do and split their souls. much to think about. feel free to send ur thots and ideas my way

21. ya know im basic and always on my bellamort bs and therefore: as the years go by voldemort warms up to bella. not that he wasn’t already extremely fond of her before but he kicks it up a notch. i mean, he’s already taken over the world so it’s high time to start experimenting with other wilder things like Feelings. 80/90 years old isn’t too late to experience Love or whatever. might as well wake up one day and realize you’re completely and utterly in love with the woman you’ve spent the last 50+ years with whew. LIKE to be fair bella knows him better than anyone — they understand each other, they’re familiar with each other’s likes, dislikes, mannerisms, nervous tics etc etc. let’s be real it freaked voldemort out at first, being vulnerable to any degree (not that he let it show) but it just became so easy to tell her things that it became a natural thing to do. and obvs he trusts her to keep everything between them and never judge him for anything so that’s sweet

22. y’all keep asking me for domestic hcs but what can i possibly say?? imagine literally any domestic scenario ever and just think bellamort and i’ve probably imagined that same scenario before. except its sexier bc the world is dark and evil and they live in a dark gloomy super fancy manor. so we have these 2 goths right but they’re in love but in that casual familiar way YALL GET ME and sometimes they even drink coffee together in the mornings or like. do that thing where Person A returns from work late at night and its dark and raining and Person B is already home just chilling and they don’t even have to talk they just go about their nighttime routine but it’s soft and familiar and COMFORTABLE. i clearly dont have enough softness in my life i just. love domestic scenarios bye

23. i forgot everything else i wanted to write bc i got distracted by domesticity. im also thinking about how voldemort absolutely despises the thought of any pda but he’ll take bella by the wrist in public every so often when he wants to get her attention, or like. put his hand on her back. small things but oh so soft

24. hhhh okay i have a LOT to say about the power fam’s fashion choices but it’s hard to explain without pictures. i have a wholeass ppt presentation but i’m not about to upload 20+ slides to tumblr. but i seriously was not kidding when i said voldemort wears fancy suits and yes i have references. meanwhile delphi is a fan of feathers but mostly goes with lowkey military-style outfits.. she’s practical yet ostentatious. bella sticks to a conservative yet undeniably sexy selection of evil looking dresses.. i should make all of these into pinterest boards hmm

25. controversial opinion but i think delphi knows she and voldemort are half bloods. so does bella but that’s a whole other story, she been knew. anyhow yeah delphi was told the truth bc it was better for her to find out from the source rather than hear rumors from the opposition and begin to distrust the foundations of voldemort’s whole empire and voldemort himself

26. i used to absolutely hate fics where bella would eventually call voldemort by his name but now im like FUCK THAT we don’t do guilty pleasures anymore we just stan ridiculous things and that’s that. one day voldemort had a Thought (shocking, i know) and was like. Hm so we have a wholeass child and we’re basically married maybe bella shouldn’t have to call me My Lord for the rest of her life. BUT ONLY IN PRIVATE. THATS BETWEEN THE TWO OF THEM it’s nobody’s business. It Is Nobody’s Business

27. speaking of marriage. bella and rod got divorced a few years after the battle. it was just a formality tho let’s be real. they remained very close friends tho!!!!!!!! i think that’s an unpopular opinion among bellamort stans but i genuinely believe bella and rod were always close the way best friends or family are ya know. rod really loves bella but as long as she’s happy he’s happy even if it means her fucking the dark lord on the reg or whatever

28. going back to #6 — when the public finally finds out that bella’s alive they obviously start to wonder about her and voldemort and connect the dots re: delphi etc but nobody ever gets any concrete answers bc there’s never any public pda.. any sort of affection is limited to when it’s just the two of them. and obviously it’s not like voldemort gossips about his private life in tabloid interviews or whatnot. ALSO the whole Bella Is Alive reveal isn’t nearly as dramatic as delphi’s big moment.. it’s more discreet and insidious in that way it implies that she was there hiding in plain sight all along. and if the ministry can keep sth this big a secret, what else are they hiding.. ah classic intimidation tactics of an authoritarian regime

29. i dont think this is ever stated in the CC but in terms of politics and bureaucracy i imagine voldemort has a fancy office in the ministry and spends 99% of his time there and rarely spends any time out and about. he’s almost never seen by anyone, rarely attends events etc. delphi’s the one who handles the day to day shit in the wizarding world. she’s like.. the public relations manager.. between the public and voldemort

30. bella is of similar status within the ministry but that’s just bc people are scared shitless of her. she doesn’t actually hold any political power and she most certainly does not want to, that is not her area of expertise at all

31. delphi is dangerously powerful and i think that’s really sexy of her

32. re: #21 it’s like. as voldemort warms up to bella, she in turn chillaxes a bit with the whole blind devotion thing and becomes bolder with him like. she’ll outright question his decisions or tell him what he should do, make judgement calls etc. and it becomes a regular thing.. turns into this casual companionship ya feel.. i won’t say they become equals bc that’s just unrealistic but he certainly stops treating her like his inferior. he recognizes her value and i daresay her authority and stops treating her like shit all the time Wow Romance Is Alive!! (this sounds like some sort of “douche fuckboi changes for his poor mistreated love interest” schtick but it’s really not that bc they’re both monstrous people who do not deserve any pity so jot that down. they’re horrible and they deserve each other and they eventually do make it work and i am so so happy for them)

33. it is never outright stated that voldemort can’t love. jkr has said that he doesn’t understand love and that it’s just symbolism!!! that he’s the child of a loveless union and grew up without knowing love!!! BUT THAT DOESN’T MEAN HE PHYSICALLY CANNOT LOVE thanks for coming 2 my ted talk. i wasn’t aware of this until a few months ago and i was thrilled to find out my soft hcs are not entirely ooc after all

34. THE POINT IS. THEY ARE A SEMI-FUNCTIONAL FAMILY and i just really love soft domestic scenarios so sorry jkr but the dark au is the only canon now and it belongs to me. everybody has feelings and everything is soft. i’d like to pitch an idea for a kuwtk style reality show but it’s these 3 sociopaths under one roof navigating family life and wizarding world politics

35. to finish i’d like to apologize for downplaying the fact that all 3 of the people i woobified in this post are psychotic murderers and tyrants etc

—— i’ll be updating this if/when i remember anything i forgot AND ALSO send me ur thoughts and comments and constructive criticism etc pls pls pls 

—— follow me on twitter and also curiouscat bc i get a scary amount of q’s about voldemort’s sex life thank you and goodbye

edits:

36. in this household we stan dark haired delphi. no i will not be taking any criticism regarding this particular fact

37. bella and voldemort never get married. obviously, because that’s a disgustingly romantic and pointless thing to do. it’s sentimental and unnecessary (well, voldemort thinks so, bella might just disagree but she’s not about to force his hand) BUT that’s not to say they’re not basically an old married couple anyway. AND as much as voldemort thinks love is weakness or whatever he knows this, that they’re about as close as two people can get. SO if he just so happens to gift her a ring.. well it’s a purely symbolic gesture but the implication is definitely there

38. it’s the horcrux ring. he trusts her that much. m y  h e a r t

[taylorhardybby]

sweetener // ben hardy x reader and bestfriend! Lucy x reader.

hi so basically the reader is a famous musician (shes pretty much based on Ariana Grande with syle elements from kylie jenner but picture her as anyone you like)  this is pretty long and I realised everything I've posted has had the same sort plot kinda so ill be changing that up I promise. 

5.7K words. 

also I've linked the songs that I mention  and ideas of the outfits I've mentions just cause i can I guess. enjoy xo 

_____________________________________

You were 19 when you first met Lucy. She was 22 and you met at a charity gala. You were new in the industry, barely knowing anyone. You and Lucy became instant best friends. She was like your big sister, your mom and your best friends rolled into one person and you couldn’t be more thankful for her. Fast forward three years and Lucy was working on one of her biggest projects yet. Bohemian Rhapsody. You had just released your lasted album and were only weeks away from tour, but when Lucy asked of you would come visit her you were on a plane within the hour.

You had barely seen your best friend in almost two months due to your album blowing up then your surprise world tour, for the last 10 weeks you spent every waking moment  rehearsing,  doing chorography, or at costuming fittings if you weren’t preparing for tour you were doing a interviews or attending events and award shows. You were completely exhausted. But you were new and young, and your record company had almost complete control over you. You were terrified if you said no, they would drop you, and you had worked too hard for that.

Your plane landed in London and you went straight to your hotel, Lucy would be filming until 9pm tonight then she was coming straight over to spend the night and in the morning you would both head over to the set. You were beyond excited, queen had been such a inspiration both musically and just in general through your entire life and to see even a tiny bit of the movie about them would be an honour.

It was 6pm when you got to your hotel, so you had three hours to kill, you considered just going for a walk and exploring but you had seen a few paps at the airport so you were sure there would be more. So you started rehearsing, you played the backing track to your newest song, Everytime. The choreography was fast and you kept messing up the steps during the chorus.

Time slipped away as you rehearsed, and your phone ringing brought you out of your trance.

“Hey sorry, ive bene so distract-” you were cut off, not even bothering to see who was actually calling, until you hear her voice.

“ive bene knocking for ages come let me in baby” you smiled at the nickname, lucy always called you baby, maybe it was because you were younger than her or she said it’s what her older sister would call her.

“oh my god sorry I’m coming lulu” you ran to the door of the hotel room apartment, the door swung open and Lucy was standing their champagne in hand and overnight bag in the other. She dropped her bag and pulled you in for a hug.

“I missed you so much lulu ”

“mee too, baby. I’m so sorry I miss everything” you had come inside and closed the door by now,

“your album release and the Grammys, you won and I wasn’t even there I’m  so sorry” you shook your head,

“its fine trust me its been crazy busy and this is important for you. I’m  just so happy that I get to see you now”

“yes me too now I want all the gossip”

You popped the champagne and shared not only that bottle but another you had found the mini bar, you spoke about your ex Kevin, and how he was inspiration for a few songs on your album. Lucy insisted on listening to your album from start to finish you didn’t mind. You loved your songs and you loved that your best friend sang along to every single word. Your tour was still a secret. Your record company wanted to announce it a week before you actually left, in the same way they kept your album a secret until a week before its release date. You were sworn to secrecy and you had told nobody but your mom, and when Lucy asked how you  were, really truly, you broke down.

“I’m a mess luce, I’m going on tour, surprise!” Lucy congratulated you but she knew you weren’t finished “I’m running myself ragged, if I’m not rehearsing im at a costume fitting I’m doing promo for the album or I’m at an awards show or event” you flopped back onto the bed trying to just let your body rest.

“I’m so tired I never stop. And thank god you called because this three-day break is such a blessing you have no idea” Lucy pulled you into a hug reassuring you it would all work out,

“what about with Kevin, how are you in realm” you sighed, you and Kevin broke up for a good reason, he was having personal issues and it was hurting you physically and mentally, so you left.

“I miss him so much, but I know that I did the right thing for me, I was so unhealthy always looking after him I forgot about me” you paused and thought for a moment “I think he’s better, from what I’ve heard, I still speak to his mom every now and then” Lucy nodded

“you did the right thing Y/N I know you loved him, but you need to look after yourself first” you nodded. The conversation turned a little lighter and you decided to pop another bottle of champagne just because you could,

“to us, successful women who are making shit happen” you made a toast and Lucy shouted back “to us” you changed the music and danced, laughed and just had fun with your best friend.

You woke up to the sun in your eye and Lucy’s alarm blaring, your head was pounding, and you looked around. Lucy was slowing waking up in the bed next to you. You had clearly tried to find pyjamas but you both looked like a mess. As you stood up out of bed you looked down at out outfit, a pair of black hotpants and a large oversized grey shirt tied in a knot and one blue sock. Lucy didn’t look much better and as you looked each their up and down you both laughed. The apartment was a mess. There was pillows and blankets everywhere, you counted 5 champagne bottles, all but one were empty the last was about three-quarters gone.

It was 7 am and Lucy was needed on the set at 8:30 so you both got ready, Lucy ordered breakfast- more specifically coffee, very strong and lots of it.

Once you looked presentable, Lucy looked you up and down raising an eyebrow,

“heels? Really Y/N” her tone was mockingly, and you just shrugged

“you know I love my heels, they make a statement” you twirled, and Lucy laughed at you

“also, I like to feel taller, it’s not easy being tiny”

Lucy drove you to the set, stopping to get more coffee on the way. You had music blaring the whole time just laughing and smiling. The set looked pretty normal and when you got there you followed Lucy to her trailer where you both set down your stuff. Her first costume of the day was already hanging so she got changed then wrapped herself in a coat. You followed her to hair and makeup,  and to your surprise Rami was already there when you walked in and Lucy introduced you of course.

Rami was very sweet and you felt much more comfortable knowing at least one more person liked you here. He mentioned your music and you blushed. These people knew who you were holy shit.

“I actually brought you album the day it came out, I love it” you laughed,

“thanks rami that’s really sweet of you, its still kind mind-blowing that people other than Lucy and my parents listen to my music” everyone laughed and the conversation flowed. Rami left soon after and Lucy finished not much later,

“okay so my the first scene today isn’t until later but we can go watch the boys film if you want” she checked her watch,

“they start in 20 so that heaps of time for you to meet them and what not” you nodded and just followed her into the sound stage.

From the moment you saw him you were breathless, you of course had googled all of Lucy’s co-stars as soon and she knew them but seeing him in person was something else, you eyes met his and you felt you cheeks heat up. You turned your face towards Lucy, sending her a smile but she sent you a knowing look. When you looked panicky, she giggled a little,

You walked over, and they group of four men turned towards you,

“hey Lucy, oooh who’s your friend” the man you assumed was playing john deacon spoke first.

“Joe, Gwil and Ben this is my best friend Y/N” she gestured to you and she spoke “Y/N this is Joe, Gwil, Ben and you of course know rami who you met earlier” you nodded and shook each of their hand but before you could say anything you were cut off,

“Lucy why didn’t you tell us that your Y/N was THE Y/N”  Joe playfully pushed Lucy and she tried to explain, but before you could get to deep in conversation the boys were called to their scene.

The scene was a short one and soon enough Lucy was whisked away to work so you sat there just on your phone, you felt someone come over towards you and you looked up. It was him. Ben Hardy. To say that you were in love was  a bit much, but he was so gorgeous it was hard not to. As he walked over to you smiled but internally you were panicking. You just kept telling yourself don’t make a fool of yourself, don’t do it

“Uh hey Y/N, where’d Lucy go” of course, he just wanted Lucy not you,

“oh she went to do some filming I’m not sure how long she’ll be”

“Okay cool so um are you hungry” you internally died omg what was he going to say holy shit

“I’m starving” he invited you to go with him for lunch, it was just Kraft services but you didn’t mind.

You spent the entire lunch hour just talking and laughing, it was so refreshing for someone to talk to you as just Y/N not THE Y/N.

You spent the next three days surrounded by the BoRhap boys and Lucy having the time of your life. You and Ben had gotten quite close and even while you were still in London if you weren’t with each other you were texting. You decided against telling Lucy, not wanting to make it weird between her and her co-stars.

Two weeks after arriving back in LA the tour was announced, it sold out almost everywhere and you were glad to see that your London tour date was the same weekend that BoRhap wrapped filming, Lucy had already texted that she was coming and that she would need six more tickets which you gave her no questions asked.

You went on tour and it was marvellous, the adrenalin you felt as thousands of people sang along to your songs was thrilling and you never wanted it to stop. You played shows all across the US, you were halfway through the US leg of the tour when you got a surprise. You had still been talking to ben every day and although you hadn’t put a label on it you felt pretty committed. You were in your dressing room, your show started in three hours, so you were slowing warming up your voice when you heard a knock.

When you answered the door there stood Ben his gleaming smile beamed from ear to ear, and he was holding a bunch of flowers, your favourite of course.

“holy shit what are you doing here” he pulled you into his arms and you hugged back excitedly,

“we had a few days off from shooting, so I thought I’d come visit you”  you pulled him into your dressing room and placed the flowers down, your eyes met, and the world felt like it melted away. He pulled you closer and whispered so quietly,

“Y/n can I please kiss you” you nodded,

“please” you barely got the word out from your mouth and your lips were on his.

Everything moved so fast and he fell back onto the sofa and you moved, straddling his lap. Every move felt like it was perfectly practiced and every touch felt like fire and you both shed yourself of clothes, ben of course being the perfect gentle mean continued to ask for permission before doing anything  you were to in the moment to speak so nodding sufficed.

Time passed, and you were lying in bens arms on the sofa, a random sheet covering you as you just held each other.  You lazily shared kisses and spoke about your time apart. The sound of your manager knocking on the door made you jump apart,

“Y/N they need you in hair and makeup” you jumped up and threw on your panties, bra and covered up with your robe.

“shit sorry ben, I totally lost track of time, stay here and I’ll send someone to come and get before the show”

“ill be waiting” you kissed him before closing the door behind you and walking down to hair and makeup.

You were in your first costume, as you walked towards the under stage your makeup artist fixed up the bright red lipstick you had on and you had you Mic in hand. You were ready.

You had never felt so pumped for a show before, partially because you knew Ben was there the other part was probably your post orgasm bliss. You snickered to yourself as you thought about it.

The show was a smash, the crowd were full of energy and so were you. As you walked off stage ben was waiting in the wings for you, he picked you up and spun you around, your lips connected as he did.

“what did you think of the show”

“you were bloody fantastic, I loved it the music, the dancing, the costumes” his kissed you again, “and I thought I was the rock star” you laughed at that one,

“you’ll always be a rock star” you walked hand in hand back to you dressing room, your meet and greet outfit was already laid out and you apologised to ben as you got changed.

“I’m sorry the meet and greets only go for 45 mins then we can go back to the hotel and I’m all yours I promise” he shook his head,

“it’s fine doesn’t apologise I need to make some phone calls anyway, you better keep that promise” he teased, you zipped up your dress. It was short red and left little to the imagination and you loved how ben eye you as you spun and asked his opinion.

“Y/n your making it hard from me not to rip that off your right now” you bit you lip and whispered into his ear,

“I promise you can rip it off later” you kissed directly behind his ear then giggled as he groaned when you walked away.  

The meet and greet felt like it dragged on for hours. Now you loved your fans but  the torment knowing exactly what was going to happen afterwards was enough to make you a little frustrated.

Finally you were back at the hotel, it was a short drive from where you had performed so the car ride wasn’t as tormenting as it could have been. But from the moment you stepped foot in the hotel room the door was locked, and your lips were on Ben’s and your legs were wrapped around his waist.

It was early morning before you had stopped. You both finally so exhausted that you fell sound asleep. Ben woke you up at around 11:30 the next morning apologising as the directors had called him and he was needed back on set ASAP. His flight left in an hour, so you said goodbye, and a little more very quickly and he left. Your next show wasn’t until tomorrow night, but you were flying there later this afternoon.

Three months after Ben had left your US tour was finished, you had gotten so sick and exhausted for weeks now you had been nauseous and your whole body ached. Your period was late, it was the stress. It had to be the stress.  You now had two weeks before the European leg of the tour started, and you were going to stay with Lucy. She had about a week and a half left of filming and although you really wanted to go visit the set you just so sick you could barely move.

Lucy picked you up from the airport and she took you back to her apartment. She brought it up first, after you had been explaining your sickness she blurted it out before she could stop herself,

“Y/N what if your pregnant”

“don’t be ridiculous how could I be- oh shit”

“oh shit what. What do you mean oh shit”?

“he-h came and visited it was months ago fuck why didn’t I think of this” you were rambling and so distracted you did even see your best friends face,

“Y/N who visited who are you talking about Kevin” by now you were crying, you shook your head

“no not Kevin, ben” Lucy gasped,

“ben who, Y/N”

“Ben Hardy” Lucy had that smirk,

“I knew it, I knew you were who he had been talking to”

“your not mad” you were so worried, that she would think you were unprofessional or soothing,

“not at all I don’t care I saw how you too looked ta each other when you first met, it was bound to happen”

So you explained to her when he came and surprised you three months ago and how you spent all night together alone in the hotel room, she was happy for you. That you had moved on form Kevin, but the looming issue was still there. Were you pregnant or not? Lucy disguised herself and drove down the street to the local pharmacy and brought a few tests.

You were terrified, your career had barely even begun and here you were at 21 and potentially pregnant to a man who’s 7 years older than you. You thought about your options, but you knew you would keep it. You had once promised yourself if something like this were to happen you would only get rid of it if it was going to harm you or if you weren’t going to be able to support a child. From what you knew it wasn’t hurting you and you had plenty of funds to support a baby.

You tried to think and work it out, the European part of your tour was only 3 months long. By the end you would be six-ish months pregnant. That’s not too bad. If you altered some of the choreography and costumes, you could probably hide it from the fans until then. It would all work out in the end.

You were brought out of your dream land when Lucy came back. She passed you the first test and came with you into the bathroom.

So you sat. three whole minutes. 180 seconds. The timer went off and Lucy grabbed your hand.

“no matter what that says, I’m here for you we can work this out” you nodded, took a deep breath and turned the test.

Positive.

You don’t even know how long you spent sobbing into Lucy’s arms. But eventually you got up and tried to fix yourself up. You and Lucy were meant to be meeting everyone for dinner tonight and it was 5 pm and you were a hot mess.

So, you showered, fixed your hair and did your makeup. You weren’t even sure how far along you were but now that you knew you were so paranoid that you look pregnant, so you put of two different pairs of spanx and threw on your least fitted outfit.

The dinner went well, considering you entire life had just changed an hour before and you were acting like you were perfectly fine. On the inside you were dying. You sat next to ben and he asked if you were okay more time than you could count. You felt horrible. You wanted to tell him, you really did but you couldn’t put that pressure on him. You could handle this own your own. Lucy surprised everyone with tickets to your London show at the end of dinner, and you were happy but terrified. Lucy had invited all the BoRhap boys as well as Roger and Brian. THE Roger Taylor and Brian May.  You were shitting yourself.

In the next two weeks you and Lucy went to the doctors and it was confirmed, you were 14 weeks pregnant. You had a meeting with your head of costuming and she agreed to fix your costumes as discretely as possible, so far only four people knew. Lucy, your doctor, your manager -Angela and your head of costume and makeup -JayJay.

Your London show came so fast, everyone had come backstage to see you. You were in your first costume once again . So far you hadn’t needed to fix the sizing you just wore a waist trainer and spanx underneath. You checked with the doctor who said it should be fine for a few hours for your shows, but you shouldn’t do it all the time. When you walked into your dressing room in your outfit Lucy gave you a worried look but she was confused when she saw no bump. You gave everyone hugs as they wished you luck, you thanked everyone for coming and promised them that this would be one of your best.

The show opened with one of your favourites on the album, God is a woman.  It was followed by breathin’ you spoke to the crowd and in a split second you had a costume change. You were wearing a sparkly red outfit now and your boots were now tan. You had changed your finale so when you changed into the lilac dress and boots, the first few beats of your new song filled the arena.

Breakfast at tiffany’s and bottles of bubbles,

Girls with tattoos who like getting in trouble,

Lashes and diamonds, ATM machine s

Buy myself all my favourite things

This was the first time your new song was being heard and the crowd loved it, 7 Rings was a hit and you finished the performance on a high like no other.

You came off and Lucy was there first screaming with joy

“WHERE THE HELL DID THAT SONG COME FROM ITS AMAZING” “it was a surprise its brand new I literally flew to LA the day before I came here to record it and we did the choro this morning” everyone was in awe of your work ethic and you were passed flowers and small gifts. you excused yourself to get changed. Lucy came with you.

“I can’t believe you went to LA to record the day before you came here, you were so sick that day”

“I know but they won’t let me perform songs until live recorded them in studio and I wanted to perform it for you guys” Lucy picked out an outfit for you before you both headed back to where everyone was.

Backstage the party was growing; your management had thrown a party to celebrate the start of your European tour.  Against all your wishes against it. Champagne was spilling, and the music was loud. You took a glass of champagne just for looks, you had no intentions of actually drinking it.

You found ben almost instantly and he embraced you, you still hadn’t told him but you were going to. Tonight. Its was selfish, you knew you were leaving on tour tomorrow and at least if he wanted nothing to do with you, you would be distracted. Heartbroken but distracted.

It was almost one and the party was still going strong, you took ben’s hand and asked if he wanted to back to your hotel room. You saw Lucy smile as you left, you had to do this. From the moment you were in the car the partition went up and all your plans went out the window. It was cruel, to keep the secret from him but a few moments of bliss before it could all potentially disappear was all you wanted.

You stopped it before it got too heated, one part of you said it was because of the paps and another was because you felt so guilty. Ben didn’t mention it. You went in through the back entry of the hotel and you went straight up to your room.

“Y/n what’s up you’ve been just a little off these last two weeks, Lucy said you’ve been sick” he paused, fuck. He knew. “are you okay, like are you really sick or something, last time I checked the flu doesn’t last for weeks” you sighed and ran you hand though your hair,

“no its not like that I’m not dying or anything I promise” you took a deep breath

“but there is something need to tell you” you sat down trying to calm your nerves, “now just know before I tell you I expect NOTHING from you okay but you deserve to know” Ben looked terrified, you were pretty sure he could have put two and two to bet but just to be clear you said it,

“I’m pregnant, 15 weeks to be exact and its yours”  he didn’t move you swore he barely even breathed. Tears were slipping down your cheeks you wanted him to do something, scream or yell anything was better than silence.

“please. Please say something I’m so sorry it took this long to tell you-“ but he cut you off when he attached his lips to yours.

“I love you Y/n I really fucking love you, and I was going to ask you tonight anyway, but will you be my girlfriend officially”

You nodded, not trusting your words.

“I love you to ben, I really fucking love you too”

You decided to announce your relationship to the fans the next day, as much as you wanted to keep it a secret the longer, they know about it  the less of a shock the pregnancy should be. Hopefully. You posted a selfie of you and Ben, he was kissing you sweetly and it was obvious what had taken place earlier. You had taken the picture month ago and you both loved it.

Now that Ben was finished filming BoRhap and his next project started in 3 months, so it seemed logical that he would  come on tour with you. You decided that he was going to head home and take a few weeks off just relaxing and what not then he would meet you when you got to Paris. It sounded perfect.

It worked. Tour was hard, each day your bump grew, and it was getting very difficult to hide it in the end. But with lighting and costuming you finished tour with a six-month-old baby bump and it was still a secret.  A few weeks into the euro tour you changed all your costumes to from body suits and peplum to flouncy dresses. They all looked gorgeous and you were totally going to be using then in your other tours.

Ben was a god send. You loved having him with you and when tour was over, he was moving to the states. After a hard decision he decided to move to your house, instead of you moving in with him. Living in LA would probably benefit him in the long run anyway, so it wasn’t too hard of a decision.

You had decided to announce your pregnancy at the BoRhap Premier. Your dress was ready. It was the first tight dress you had worn in a while and it perfectly showed your  7-month-old baby bump. The fans were loving your relationship and you hoped the reaction to this would be as happy.

The day of the premier had arrived and you had spent hours In hair and makeup, you were nervous. Excited but nervous. You swear you heard the gasps as you stood out from the car. You were sure it was already world wise news,

“Americas sweetheart Y/N pregnant at 22 to her 28-year-old boyfriend”

You spent the night being questioned about your bump; why it was kept a secret, how far along were you blah blah blah.

By the time you got inside you were exhausted. Your feet hurt, because you were wearing your beloved heels of course. Your face hurt from smiling and your back was killing. Ben tried to look after you, and he got you everything you wanted. Lucy and Rami had also announced their relationship tonight, so the press was buzzing with all this new information.  Lucy sat next to you laughing at all the notifications you were getting,

“hey baby I think you broke the internet have you checked anything”

“im too scared, can you. Check my twitter” Lucy nodded, and she gasped

“they love it. Everyone loves it. Look your fans they did the maths and realised you were pregnant on tour and they love you for it” you started crying. Fucking pregnancy and its hormones . what a relief.

The premier went well and once you flew home, you were on the plane with all the BoRhap boys and Lucy  because as they had promo for the next few weeks. You had already decided to do another album, and you had a few songs ready to go, that you were recording then once you had the baby you would take three ish months off and you would be back in the studio.  Your record company had decided instead of doing another tour if your album was received well you would do more events like award ceremonies  and music festivals. You agreed. You knew that you wanted to continue with music and your baby would always be your first priority.

On the exact day you were 39 weeks, you were standing in the recording booth, it was your last day and you had one last verse to record. Ben had promo all day and you were meeting for lunch in about and hour. As you sang your last lyric everyone clapped, and you were beaming.

“fuck”  this caught the attention of your manager,

“Y/n is everything okay?”

You shook your head,

“my waters just broke”

You were rushed into your car and Angela your manager drove to the hospital as you called ben. He was in the middle of an interview when he was ushered off stage,

“what wrong,”

“Y/n’s waters broke and she son her way to the hospital this interview finishes in about 5 then you’re going straight away”

When Ben arrived with Lucy in tow you were in the hospital bed trying get through another contraction.

At 3:21 pm your gorgeous baby boy was brought into the world. Noah Benjamin Jones was perfect in every way. He was a carbon copy of his father, much to your disgrace. Nine months of pregnancy and he looks like his father. Typical male.  

Noah was the perfect baby, and as you went back to work, he came along and was an angel. When Noah was three you toured again you took your little family with you. Noah loved to see all the new cities and he became a crowd favourite when he would come out and dance with his mamma on stage for his favourite song. History seemed to repeat itself and you found yourself pregnant again in your last few weeks of your second tour.

Your family grew,  your second child was born, a little girl Lucia Rae Jones, named after your best friend of course Lucy.  When Lucia or Cici, was six months old you and ben finally decided to get married. It was a quite a large wedding, but it was full of love and that mattered to you.

[thcmpscn]

‘’NIGHT CONVO’’ – Meston.

LOC: preston’s apartment. @fckmonax

MONA

knocks on the door, super nervous but also excited

PRESTON

takes a deep breath before opening the door “You made it in time, dinners almost ready. Come in”

MONA

grins “Yeah, of course. This has been all I could think about literally since we planned it.” steps inside and kisses his cheek

PRESTON

pulls her in for a quick hug after she kisses him “You’re hype for a chicken salad?”

MONA

“I’m so hype for chicken salad.” lingers in the hug for a bit before heading towards the kitchen “It’s kinda weird but I always wonder how the flavor of food transitions into breast milk. Like what will Venecia taste when I get back home? So many questions.”

PRESTON

“I read somewhere that food makes your milk taste saltier or sweeter, depending on what you eat.” says as they both walk into the kitchen “you’re the only person I know that would get hype for a chicken salad” laughs

MONA

“Huh. Honestly, poor kid. Unable to enjoy actual good food. Has to settle for breastmilk.” leans back against the counter, arms crossed over her chest “What can I say? I find pleasure in the little things.”

PRESTON

''I'm pretty sure milk is her favorite thing in the whole wide world right now.'' chuckles before looking at her for a sec. ''You look nice tonight.''

MONA

“Wow, she’s not nearly as complex as I thought she was.” chuckles, glances down at her outfit despite knowing exactly what she chose “Oh this? I just kinda threw something on. My only qualification was that it didn’t have spit up on it. Thanks though.”

PRESTON

''She really isn't. It'll be a minute before she's just as complex as her mama, though.'' chuckles ''You're welcome. Next time we're having burgers, no salad.''

MONA

“I’m both excited and terrified for that when that day comes.” rolls eyes “It’s gotta be a really, really special occasion. But sure, we’ll have burgers at some point.”

PRESTON

''You'll experience what its like to handle Ramona Mason. It's a lot, I'll tell you that.'' smirks and squints his eyes ''Every single time you see me is a special occasion, keep that in mind.''

MONA

“Yikes, it’ll be like karma coming for me.” grins and shakes her head “So. When are we eating? Not gonna lie, I definitely came over here primarily for the food.”

PRESTON

''It really will be like that.'' shakes head and sighs before letting out another chuckle in serving her plate. ''There you go, hopefully you enjoy the only reason you came here for''

MONA

“I really wanted to bring her her tonight by the way. Like why not? She’s a baby, it’s not like she’s distracting or anything. Fabian literally made me pump and leave her though.” smiles widely as he fixes her plate, takes a seat at the table “Fix yours too. It’d be rude of me to eat alone in someone else’s home.”

PRESTON

''It's alright, makes sense he wouldn't want her here. We'll take it slow, I guess.'' reassures her before shaking his head. ''No, it's alright. I already ate two burgers on my way here, I'm good. – and, someone else's home? really?''

MONA

“Still, it’s annoying. He’s annoying. nods and proceeds to take a bite of her chicken salad “P, stop. You know what I mean. Not that I don’t feel at home here, but you literally cooked for me and it’d be super rude of me to proceed to eat without checking if you were as well. That’s all I meant.”

PRESTON

''He's being a dad and an ex, It can't be easy.'' sighs before nodding ''I get that but you'll have to get used to me cooking for you without worrying if I ate or not''

MONA

rolls her eyes “I guess.” continues eating “Ooor you could just wait to eat until you’re with me next time. Could be like a lil family dinner.”

PRESTON

“Good idea, I’ll wait for you next time if I manage to not go crazy with hunger. - is your food good?”

MONA

“The food’s amazing.” makes a show of taking another bite and moaning “Love having my own personal chef.”

PRESTON

laughs and shakes head “Yeah, nothing’s free in life, you’re gonna have to pay for that food.”

MONA

raises brows “Is paying you with my presence not enough?”

PRESTON

“Give me a kiss and we’re good” smirks

MONA

is taken aback for a sec, chuckles before shaking her head “Nah, my breath smells like chicken salad.”

PRESTON

hums “I guess this boutta be the last time I cook for you, then.”

MONA

groans and stands “Fine. It’s just a little weird that chicken salad breath is what you’re into.” leans in and firmly kisses his lips

PRESTON

cups her face and kisses her harder, lingering for a sec

MONA

smiles contentedly as he moves away “This is really fun, but I think we’re supposed to be talking, right?” lightly strokes his cheek “We should talk before anything else.”

PRESTON

“You’re right” nods, taking a deep breath “Finish your food and we’ll talk”

MONA

sighs, is kinda nervous “Ok. But in the meantime, tell me how your day was?” slips back into her seat, eats

PRESTON

“It was good. There was a big group of people ordering a lot of food and they kept me on my toes for the entirety of my shift but it was alright, I enjoyed it. - My neck is killing me, though.” runs a hand through his neck. “How was yours?”

MONA

pouts as she listens to his story, finishes up the last of her food “And then you really came home and cooked again? It’s almost as if you love overworking yourself.” stands to put her plate in the sink, takes his hand and leads him over to the couch “My day was good. Pretty much the exact same as all of my days lately. Ven woke up at around 6 and I fed her. We went back to sleep until like 8 and repeated the process. Then I chatted a bit over text with an old family friend of mine who is apparently seeing Kayla. Watched some tv. Did mom shit. Not a very exciting day.” positions herself behind him in the couch and begins firmly massaging his neck

PRESTON

“I don’t mind cooking for you. I enjoy it, actually. - I’ll watch it later, leave it there.” takes her hand and follows. Moaning softly when he felt her hands on his neck. “Is Ven doing alright? Like, in general? Does she have doctors appointments and such?” moans quietly again. “How did I not know you were so good at this?”

MONA

“Yeah, she’s doing amazing. Hitting all her milestones. She actually had an appointment Thursday of last week and didn’t even cry when she got her shots. I found that both admirable and terrifying.” continues massaging him, overall feeling really calm and comfortable in the situation

PRESTON

“She’s already a champ, I love that.” pauses “So, let’s just talk about what happened and all that. — Are you ready to star a new relationship?”

MONA

“Ugh. I love her.” freezes for a second before continuing the massage “I’ve honestly kinda learned my lesson with answering that question. Truth is, I don’t know. But I think so.”

PRESTON

“I’m not tryna’ make you go from a relationship to another. We can be together, take things slowly.” shrugs “Like, we don’t gotta move in together right away or do anything too drastic. Just enjoy ourselves, be there for each other and the rest will happen organically.”

MONA

manages to be caught off guard by the conversation despite knowing it was planned “I think I would really appreciate that. That’s what I was mostly scared of, I think. The whole jumping into things. I have a tendency to do that and I feel like it always ends poorly.” hesitates “I guess I’m also kind of afraid of the judgment.”

PRESTON

“It would be best if we just took it like a couple of kids, just enjoying ourselves until we both feel we’re ready to aim higher.” sighs “People won’t judge what they don’t know and they don’t gotta know about us until you want to.”

MONA

“I think I’d like that. Just opening ourselves up to something happening, but also not forcing anything.” smiles “I don’t want you to be a secret though.” sighs “As much as I hate the idea of us being judged, I hate the idea of us only being behind closed doors even more.”

PRESTON

“It’s up to you, bbygirl.” shrugs “I’m fine with whatever you decide”

MONA

“P, I am not keeping you a secret.”

PRESTON

“Alright, that’s good.” nods “How do we go about this?”

MONA

“Uh, I don’t actually. know. I literally always just dive right into the deep end of these things.” chuckles “Let’s just maybe start by making every night like tonight? Maybe some days? Like when’s the next time you’re off?”

PRESTON

shakes head and turns to face her. “First thing first.” pauses “Do you wanna be my girl? Like, officially. No messin’ around with other people, no nothing. Just the two of us.”

MONA

“Wait... so an open relationship isn’t an option?” laughs

PRESTON

“An open relationship between you, me, myself, yourself, all of us.” smirks

MONA

“Ohh, ok. Well in that case, I’m totally on board.” smirks before leaning in to kiss him

PRESTON

kisses her back, breaking the kiss to pull her into a hug “I never thought I’d see the day” chuckles, pulling away

MONA

“I never thought I’d see the day.” laughs “Seriously, I remember the day we first met and you seemed so unimpressed.”

PRESTON

“I was unimpressed, believe me.” chuckles “I was like, another rich, entitled, white girl. Groundbreaking.”

MONA

rolls eyes “Well I’m glad you gave me the opportunity to prove you wrong.”

PRESTON

“The minute you started talking about weird shit, I knew you were different.” laughs

MONA

laughs, checks phone for any updates on ven, sighs “So now what?”

PRESTON

“Now we say goodbye and you go home to that cute little baby of yours and we see each other tomorrow.” smiles

MONA

pouts “But I don’t want to say goodbye.” frowns “But I also want to know what Ven’s up to.”

PRESTON

“She’s probably missing her mama.” pulls her in for another kiss “It’ll ve tomorrow before you know it.” kisses her again

MONA

“Probably. Imagine having me smothering you every second of every day and suddenly I’m just not there?” frowns “She’s probably freaking out right now and Fabian just doesn’t want to say anything and make it seem like he doesn’t know what he’s doing.” sighs and stands

PRESTON

“it’s okay, you said she was always calm and collected, Im sure she’s not freaking out. Just missing you.” walks her to the door. “Text me, alright?”

MONA

“Yeah, but maybe that’s because I’m always around?” stops once she gets to the door, turns to face him “Yeah, of course. I’ll text you once I’m there and settled.”

PRESTON

“Please do, let me know how she’s been in your absence.” leans forward and presses his lips against hers. “Go, we’ll talk in a minute.”

MONA

kisses him back, smiles and waves before walking out of the door

[THE END]

[imissyoulilgucciv]

I think I’m sadistic, but only to myself. 

So much torture, its like watching a terrifying movie when you’re young, or something that makes you uncomfortable, you cover your eyes with your hands leaving just enough space between a few fingers to still see every bit of whats going on. 

I’m having that anxiety again, like when you first died. I have the adrenaline, to get me through the day, and I have things I can enjoy, I can get excited, but it is so much work, and at the end of the day I come here and I melt all over my keyboard. 

 So I open my old journal, the private compulsive blog, because this was around when gus was, when we met, when we took off together, when he moved to be with me and I thought it was only going to be a summer thing, when we skinny dipped, when we got addicted to noids, when we had lots of morning sex before my classes, when we took walks by rocks and stayed with each other for 4 days at a time, which was the usual, never wanting to part, addictive, addicts in love and not for the best. I stil feel so much like I ruined everything, like I really failed. 

I slip into delusions of taking this to the extreme, even though I know he did this, and he did love me, but I am so involved I get so confused and I have to repeatedly do this over and over again, and then I get really crazy and I Start reading things and its so fucking fresh, its like everything comes back. The memories never leave, but you store them elsewhere, I wouldn’t have thought back to this day we were in the car and we had this green bong and that image I just... its so clear. 

The bed sheets on my bed are so clear, rolling around and watching british television shows. I forgot about spending 4 days at a time with him, I forgot how hard it was to seperate at times, but I read this and I fucking crumble over and over again. 

In time it will get further away, in time I wnot think of him 24/7 and I can smile at his photos and I like talking about him. He DID exist, as if I have to now prove that he did, as if I have to remind people I am like this thanks to GUS that he made the biggest impact on my life, between 19-24.. and now for the rest of my life. 

You didn’t come to the show tonight gus, I told you your mom needed you to come. but you didn’t come, I watched other people find their loved ones and it was so spot on, there was someone else who commited suicide and they said to their loved ones they were okay. 

I don’t want this to be true. I’m screaming inside but all I can do is type type type. I can not communicate with my words, and its funny when a proffessor says, you have very confident writing and im like lol if only you knew its because I have thousands of pages of insanity. 

I can not blame you because you’re gone and I only have my side, our side, and it gets so bad, so out of control, and I know you dictated it but I let it spiral out because I didn’t understand what was going on, I did in some ways but not the right ways and I didn’t respond right.. I do believe there was a right. I do believe you could..., 

I can’t even imagine like if you were still alive, to think of unwinding the last three months of my life which have been a fucking spiraling nightmare, there are moments of real ... empowerment? its the liberation that comes from so much pain because you refuse to let it consume you, if thats the route I go, then I kill myself, because that is no way to live. I live with this pain and I bring gus with me. Gus’s mom said how much better I seeemed to be doing, as in not doing the same questions sam thoughts of blame, I have my days, every day, but not the whole day so there is progress. 

I think of death often, which isn’t that odd, I haven’t since we got together again, but the time apart was not good, at this point traumatic, just like this is. 

So. Much. 

Gus deleted  a year of my blog when I ran the other way. He deleted it as if he could just delete himself from my life. This was so hurtful. We spent a lot of that time together and also the time I spent at my other school which was the best time for me, and that was with gus, and this time too and was with gus, its like it’s always hard but he always praised me for who I was, and that helped me be the person I can be, and want to be. I felt like he could read my mind sometimes. I felt such an attachment, I Felt so lucky, to melt when I see him. It was chaotic and hellish but I can be my best too. I don’t understand. I never will. Then I turn to what my therapist says in her culture they call these people the gift of chaos. 

I just wish it didn’t have to end, and not like this. 

all the times you drove down winding roads drunk, even tripping!!! 

how did we get here, its, again, like one small thing could have resulted so differently and yet it didn’t, it was preventable, and I didn’t and couldn’t prevent it. I could have seen you the day before, I wanted to, we misunderstood each other, but I realize how distant my texts can sound so I understand the confusion but I felt so pure about it. I’m so broken about this. 

I think of dying so I can be with you, its not uncommon to do this, but its not just about being with you because part of me also thinks thats not gauranteed, I mean an after life isn’t at all, which would be okay too, because then its just nothingness which really doesn’t even exist not conceptually or physically... so not in the body I know. 

I just think of how at peace they say you are, and the dreams I had you were so happy and they were not like my other dreams, not like any I’ve ever had, and to make the extra effort of telling me it was real.. I just 

what is this

I need you to tell me not to join you. I feel like when your mom dies, I will go too. I can’t do anything while she is alive. We are broken. I wish she knew what her acceptance means to me. I wish she knew. 

how do I get through this. What kind of life is this. I just keep going day by day like I really understand what that means, and my days feel like they don’t end and then I wake up disapointed I didn’t get another visit. I reach my arms over, I read the fucking posts about how you could hold me all night 

I forgot you did that, for some reason I remembered you as not being that way, I don’t sleep well, or still so I just didn’t remember that.. but there it is, clear as can be. 

It takes me back to who we were. To how much changed in just 3...4.... years. the growth, the period of depression which is really like this void I don’t even like to think about. I will have to sort through and accept that part. to understand its value but I can’t do it right now. 

I’m rambling now because sleep is scary, and I don’t have it in me to work.