#my life was flashing before my eyes bro omg

[lordgolden]

just thought I made a horrible mistake at work after I called a clerk about one of my cases bc it wasn’t moving forward and I went through the whole scenario in my head like this case I’ve been working on for months is going to be dismissed, my client is going to be so upset and she will never see any money from this, my job is going to fire me, then I’ll get disbarred and censured for malpractice, and then I’ll have to start a new career and for some reason that new career was working at a hardware store for minimum wage in the plant department. all this to say I AM ABOUT TO SEND THE CUNTIEST LETTER TO THIS COURT BC THEY WERE WRONG NOT ME!!!!

[woongiez]

Hiii it's my first time asking you for smt, just so yk I LOVE GUNWOOK SM BRO LIKE I JUST WANNA KEEP THAT 6 FT MAN IN MY POCKET AND PROTECT HIM. yk his little head tilt thing that he does? OKAY CALL ME A WHORE FOR THINKING OF THIS BUT DUDE HEAR ME OUT. His head tilting and he's smiling while he's overstimulating you or something with toys... LIKE IDK MAYBE I'M JUST INTO LIKE THE SWITCH UP LIKE HE'S SO SWEET AND THEN BOOM😭

i never thought i'd ever start writing on tumblr until i received my first ask??/!/!&:@:@ thank u anon for bringing my writing era back 🥹 and i haven't written for a longggg time so please excuse it if it's horrible 😭

BUT OMG you're so so real i know exactly what you're talking about !!!

it's just another normal makeout session on the couch with gunwook like you have everyday but suddenly he pulls apart and looks at you with the cutest shiny puppy eyes.

"hey doll i wanna try something" he says as his cheeks turn a cherry shade of red.

he waits for your nod of approval and as soon as he gets it he picks you up swiftly, carrying you back to the room and placing you down on the bed like the princess you are. he instructs you to undress yourself and he goes into the closet to find something, but comes back with a vibrator. your eyes widen, not knowing what on earth he's going to do to you with it. he crawls towards you on the bed, placing the vibrator beside you.

"i saw these the other day and i thought of using them on you so i bought it" he flashed the most innocent little gummy smile, before smashing his lips onto yours, his teeth pulling on your lower lips as his hands roam all over your body — caressing every inch closely as if he wanted to remember the feeling of your soft skin on his fingertips for the rest of his life.

his hand dipped down to your soaking slit. "so wet already angel? we haven't even gotten started" you could feel him smirking through the kiss; his teasing just made your walls clench around nothing.

"mmh.. wook please just touch me already" your hands squeezed onto his biceps and your nails dug into the skin forming red crescent moons.

"patience baby ... don't bite off more than you can chew" he smirked as he grabbed the vibrator from beside your head, eyebrows furrowed as he tried to switch it on. the glint in his eyes and the buzz of the vibrator as it turned on told you that you were in for a long night.

you watched as he brought his fingers to your soaking wet pussy, running his middle finger up and down, as he maintained eye contact with you. your body shuddered at his touch and he smirked as he brought the vibrator to your clit. the vibrations sent waves throughout your body, the pleasure taking over your body. gunwook just watched your body writhe under him as he pressed the vibrator to your clit, setting it on the highest setting. the ecstasy took over you, your eyes rolling back and your nails digging deeper into his shoulders as you tried your very best to grip onto them. his head tilted a little to the side as he smirked down at you, watching your face contort in pleasure.

“fuck.. fu– wook im gonna c-cum” you managed to get out between gasps as your stomach twisted into a knot.

“come for me angel” he whispered as he pressed the vibrator onto your clit, his other hand reaching for your nipples, tugging and twisting at them.

you bucked your hips as you squirted all over him as you screamed his name, his soaked tank top now clinging onto the outline of his abs. your chest heaved up and down and you tried to catch your breath but the pleasure just started build up again as gunwook rubbed the vibrator on your clit.

“fuck baby that was so hot.. will you do it again?” he mumbled as he leaned and buried his face in your neck, leaving kisses all over.

“mmhh..fuck wook! t-too much!” your legs trembled and your voice started to get all pitchy as he overstimulated you. tears welled in your eyes and your thighs began to clench themselves together but he immediately brought his hand to them, spreading them wide open with all his strength, and watching in awe as your throbbing clit vibrated to the rhythm of the vibrator.

“not until you give me another one angel” he tilted his head as he looked at you, his hand cupping your tear-stained cheeks. safe to say it was a very long night indeed...

[4vanaa]

WHILE YOU WERE SLEEPING, rafe cameron, 04

summary: y/n left the outer banks years ago, determined to build a life far from the memories of her childhood love, rafe cameron. now a botanist, she's moved on-though a quiet part of her still clings to the past. when an event brings her back to OBX, she's forced to confront the one person she never truly forgot.

cw: mature language | masterlist | 03 | 05 |

❀ ❀ ❀ - indication that the chapter takes place in the past!!

❀ ❀ ❀

yourusername 3w

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yourusername better than the movies @/rafecameron

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rafecameron my sunshine

rafecameron so incredibly in love with you

yourusername i love you

sarahcameron the cutest couple

johnbroutledge no we are

rafecameron no you’re not

sarahcameron love looks so pretty on you

cleo disgustingly cute

cleo omg what about our farm wedding??

yourusername i’ll leave him, yk i love you bae

cleo ily more babe

rafecameron so it’s just fuck me huh?

yourusername yes 💔💔

wheeziecameron my future sister in law 😛😛

yourusername 🩷🩷

kiecarrera you’re so cute

yourusername 😛😛

popeheyward commenting for inclusion again

jjmaybank replying for inclusion

topperthornton bro’s a simp, never seen him act this way

rafecameron you’d understand if you could get bitches 🙂‍↔️

Your relationship had been something out of the movies. From the theme park dates, where he’d win you the biggest stuffed animal just to see your smile, to the simple picnics on his boat, where the sun would set and sink into the ocean, and for a moment it felt like the world was only yours.

Rafe was the perfect boyfriend.

He was attentive to your needs, he was constantly reassuring you, he made you feel safe and valued—everything about him felt like magic.

Tonight, the bonfire is set ablaze, its glow reflecting on your faces, its sparks floating through the air. The air smells of salt, smoke, and the heavy scent of alcohol. You watch as JJ, Pope, and cleo hit a volleyball over a stray net, their voices flowing along with the rhythm of the music.

You’re surrounded by warmth, laughter forming in your chest, your hand laced with Rafe’s. His fingers tighten briefly, and he leans close, his lips brushing your ear. “Stay here, Sunshine. I’ll grab us some drinks.”

You nod, smiling up at him. “I’m not going anywhere.”

He flashes a smile, but it doesn’t linger. His eyes search yours for a second longer than they need to before he turns and walks toward the cooler.

The fire crackles, and before you know it, you’re swept into the chaos of JJ and Pope’s game. Someone pulls you in—maybe Cleo, maybe JJ—and you’re laughing, kicking up sand as you attempt to hit the volleyball thrown your way. Your feet are bare, the cold grains of sand slipping between your toes, and for a moment, you forget everything but the feeling of freedom.

You spin, arms outstretched, hair flying wild, the night wrapping you in its soft haze. When you look up, JJ grins at you, his eyes alight with mischief. “You’re on my team now!”

You laugh, breathless, cheeks flushed from the sea breeze and running. It feels easy. Too easy.

Then the warmth fades. A chill seeps in at your back.

You turn, and there he is. Rafe. Standing just outside the fire’s glow, two drinks in his hands. His gaze is fixed on you, the firelight flickering in his eyes.

His expression is hard to read—somewhere between a smile and something else. Something that tightens the air between you.

You jog over to him, the sand cold beneath your feet. “Hey! Thanks for the drink.” You reach for the cup, your fingers brushing his. His grip lingers a second too long before he lets go.

“Looks like you were having fun,” he says, his voice low and even.

“I was.” You smile, but it falters under the weight of his stare. “We were just messing around.”

He nods, his jaw shifting slightly. “Yeah.” A pause. The fire pops and crackles. “You said you’d be by the fire.”

You blink, the words slow to register. “I was just…” You gesture toward the group, the laughter now distant, tinny in your ears. “I didn’t go far.”

He doesn’t respond right away. His eyes flick to JJ, still standing by the shore, and then back to you. The silence stretches just long enough to feel uncomfortable.

Finally, he hands you the drink. “It’s fine,” he says, his tone light, almost too light. “I just didn’t see you.”

You smile, trying to brush away the heaviness pressing at your ribs. “I’m right here.”

He nods, his gaze softening, but it doesn’t quite reach his eyes. “Yeah. You are.”

You take a sip, the cold drink burning down your throat. The music swells, the fire dances, and the laughter resumes—but everything feels just a little off-kilter, like a picture hanging slightly askew.

Rafe’s arm snakes around your waist again, pulling you close. The weight of it should feel comforting. You tell yourself it does.

“Don’t disappear on me, Sunshine,” he murmurs, his voice low and rough, like gravel under silk.

Your smile falters for just a moment. “I’m right here.”

And you are. But he wonders how long you’ll stay when the shadows he keeps hidden finally catch up.

rafecameron 3h

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rafecameron all mine

comments are off.

a/n: please stay with me i promise this gets better. also ch. 5 is out now!!!!

tags: @xoxo-ada @sabrina-carpenter-stan-account

[jade-kyo]

RvB 20th rewatch: s12

Aaaagahhahhsjshaj the mid point to the end…. Fucking agony

I never noticed the cabose written in bullet holes on the wall. Nice reference.

“I AM FUCKING AWESOME” that single moment made me fall in love with Felix…. Yeah that didn’t last

“Yay I have friends!” Me too Caboose

“You’re oddballs that don’t exactly fit in” I feel like the Chorus trilogy is just a love letter to what these characters represent to… well people like me who found comfort in a group of loser assholes finding strength and connection in each other

There is a warthog that is absolutely freaking out in the background AGDKHAKSHS

AYO Ray and Michael cameo!!!

SURPRISE MOTHERFUCKER

Grif’s mental breakdown

Hmmmm thinking about Locus and Felix not being able to return to normal life after the war…

AAAAAHHHH THEIR STRENGTH IS THEIR IDIOCY

I do feel that sometimes they overuse animation in this season… I think animation should be reserved strictly for the most necessary and funniest of bits and bad ass action scenes

Caboose gets to be the one with a good bad idea!!!!

WHY SNOWMAN

DR GRAY!!!!!! MY BELOVED

It really was a big brain move to make the feds actually not evil at all and kinda just as pathetic as the rebels

HOLY SHIT HES BILINGUAL PLEASE DONT KILL ME

“You give meaning to meaningless objects and meaningless people and then risk your lives to protect them, where’s the sense in that” I’m telling you this arc is a love letter to what this show means

Gray is unhinged- she fits right in!

Bro just got incinerated

FELIX YOU RAT BASTARD

I felt so betrayed- in hindsight I really should’ve seen it coming but I thought Felix was funny

Yo I never actually caught that Locus hands the grenade to Carolina- for some reason I always thought she just had a grenade on her

CAROLINA BABYGIRL!!!!!!!

YOU FUCK!!!!! (Just so we’re clear that was an absolutely necessary animated bit 👍🏼)

AAAAHHHH EPSILON AND CAROLINA MY BELOVED AHSKHAKSHSKHSKSH

THEYRE SO SILLY

DELTA!!!!!!

THETA!!!!!

I love the fragments ajkdhakshksh

“Just you and me sis” I AM SO NORAML ALANSKLA IA AMANA SNORNSMNSK JAKAHSNLAJANKSJSKSHWKBSKSNKSHWKSHMSK

PSYCHOANALYSIS FOR EVERYONE!!!!!

Love that Caboose is the only one who didn’t do something to the ship

I AM AN EMOTIONAL TIME BOMB Jesus Christ

“I believe he said he was paid in babies”

Lopez a real one for being the only one to remember Doc

Love the conversation between grimmons back at the crash site. nuance about Simmons and leadership or something… if you catch what I mean… Restoration (what who said that)

“MY LIFE JUST FLASHED BEFORE MY EYES!! IT WAS AWESOME!!!” Quoted line

AAAAAHHHHHHH TUCKER AND WASH!!!!!!!!

Dr. Gray my beloved

TUCKER CABOOSE MOMENT!!!

Wash was pretty dumb to just accept Freckles without question but also I never questioned it either so I can’t exactly judge

CABOOSE MY BELOVED AHAJSJAKDHKSJSKDN

SO SHUT UP AND GET OVER IT!!! Caboose finally gets to be the one to tell someone to shut up!!!!!

“Just say you’re sorry” agskahkshskjsksAJGDKAHSKHDKSGSKVDKDJKSN THEY CARE ABOUT EACH OTHER SO MUCH

CHURCH TUCKER MY BELOVED!!!!!

“Seriously? That’s it, no ‘I’m sorry’ nothing?” Carolina I feel you but also if these guys weren’t completely emotionally constipated at all times I probably wouldn’t love them as much

Also Tucker and Church’s little moment of poking fun at Carolina is so cute omg

Trocadero you are truly something to behold

TUCKER YOU ARE THE BEST OF THEM!!!!!!!

Imagine if Tucker and Church had also gotten caught in Locus and Felix’s teleporter… wouldn’t that have sucked please god I already have a big fic I’m planning I don’t need another

COLONEL SARGE

Why is Carolina so damn BIG next the chairman in that picture ajhdkahsj

P.S. suck our balls

Being completely honest I do think s12 is a little bit of the weak link in the chorus trilogy. It’s not bad but I just find more enjoyment in s11 and s13 but it is possibly Tucker at his best GOD I love him… anyway, pain 🙂

[saetoru]

TEE LMFAOOO

Let it NEVER be said that zhongli havers don't know how to dodge 💋 i need to tell u my story of beating this mini boss dhfbfudbf

So I didn't acc know where it was, I just read that its north of the court so I went looking in that region. Found it. Went onto the cliff bc I've seen the stories and was shit scared. I thought I could just Nahida sniper the shit out of it so I stood on my lil cliff and summoned Raidens eye and Nahida E

Tell me WHY IT STARTED WALKING UP THE CLIFF. Oh my goodness my life flashed before my eyes as it started walking towards me I was like HUH? WHERES MY FUCKEN INSTRUCTION MANUAL FOR THIS SHIT. Anyway I was really wary bc app this thing obliterates a 50k zhongli shield.... so I was like yeah Imma have to dodge 🙄 my worst nightmare smh.

Surprisingly the actual fight wasn't that bad? I was terrified but ngl I lasered it with nahida and shogun 🤡🤡 anything hydro gets decimated with dendro so it was acc okay! I was making progress LMFAO. I think I used zhonglis burst once and that was it. The rest was just Nahida E and NA and shogun E. Also I outsmarted the water blob by hiding behind my Zhongli pillar everytime it used that stupid ass water laser move 😒 anyway ! No characters were killed 💋 I kicked ass fuck u vivianne

I GIGGLED THE WHOLE TIME I READ THIS BC I WAS LIKE OMG !!! SHE SEES MY STRUGGLE NOW !! except i can’t believe vivianne the CUNT climbed the cliff for you HELLO ??? i stood in higher ground and has lynster shoot the shit out of her LMAOOOOOO she’s so ass to fight bro deadass i hated it sm

the first time i tried it i was genuinely so close like im fairly certain just a few hits from al haitham was all i needed and then she just ONE SHOT EVERYONE BACK TO BAVK and my dodging wasn’t good </3

BUT ABYWAY CONGRATS ON THE ACHIEVEMENT LMAOOOO no fight ninianne </3 she’s not as bad tho tbh she’s easier to dodge

[vampzxi]

hey so I went to the beach with a couple of friends today right? and one of the girls who was there she couldn't swim so she stayed on my back for like most of the time. and the second one of the boys was like "thats the deep pool" me and her went d o w n bro 😭

I was tryna get out and she kept pushing me down and I'm so surprised I didn't swallow any water

istg my life flashed before my eyes cause I barely remember anything other than a few seconds before somebody pulled me out

not you almost dying…omg…you’re a victim! 🤒 she was tryna take you out, friend ☹️

there’s no shame in wearing floaties!✊🏽 but i hope ur okay LMFAOOOO

[kithtaehyung]

RYEN HELLO OMG i'm finally here to scream in ur inbox about the window JFNDKFJNGK it's taken a minute bc i like to scroll through the chapter to make sure i don't forget anything and i can't stop re-reading it instead smh so first of all WHEN I TELL YOU MY JAW DROPPED WHEN I SAW THE TAGS omfg literally,,,, I DIDN'T EXPECT LIKE ANY OF THEM i was fr already a little feral and a little sweaty tbh. so u can imagine the whiplash when i start reading AND READER IS UPSET </3 but thank GOD for my queen dom <333333 always talking sense into reader!!! i am still literally screaming at her saying "make up with my future brother-in-law" LMAO AND EVEN THOUGH I KNEW THAT YOONGI WAS GOING TO SNEAK IN I STILL COULD NOT BELIEVE MY EYES WHEN I READ IT. i rlly love how this was "i'm yours and you're mine" but make it >:( lmao. yoongi said it best when he said "teach you to think i'm not yours. as if i don't wanna give you my shit so you can walk around everywhere with it on." SCREAMS (cut to yoongi giving reader HIS CHAIN kjgnkdjfgkjd i literally cannot stand it BUT OH MY GOD RYEN ALL THE SNEAKING AROUND GKJFKJGNDKJG literally saw my life flash before my eyes when bro came in and had to remind myself that This Is Not Real Life Please Breathe. literally every second bro wouldn't LEAVE i was just yelling in my head bc why are you here cockblocking. i love you please GET OUT. then i thought it was over AND NO??????? RYEN. look me in the eyes rn. hold my hands. ARE YOU KIDDING ME. HE KNOCKED ON THE WALL ??????? i can't complain too much bc cockwarming <3 BUT HELP. and vmin overhearing them when they think they're alone????????? dnkgjkjfdg i'm not strong enough to think too much about reader calling yoongi bitch and what happened right after. i am a weak weak person and you are so evil for making "you're gonna show me how you get off" yoongi GRAMMYS YOONGI. also bratty reader i am SCREAMING. like you're gonna call him bitch then disobey his orders????? "pass." ICON. talking about him being put in his place??? I WOULD PAY TO SEE IT. (also love how shy he was about it at the end gkjdnkfj like, sir, don't dish what you can't take. u wanna be punished a little, we get it, just say so) but it wouldn't be 3tan yoongi if he wasn't constantly checking in and taking care of reader </3 like when reader thought they heard smth and he said he was watching </3 when he thought they were in subspace and wanted to check </3 idk smth about it made me </3 </3 he's so </3 </3 i would like to end this off by saying i've never read so much smut i wish i could reenact. WHICH REMINDS ME. YOU'RE TELLING ME??? PEOPLE ARE OUT HERE USING 3TAN AS INSPO FOR THINGS TO DO WITH THEIR PARTNERS??? oh i'm so sick THAT SHOULD BE ME. like i'm glad for u but also jealousy is a disease and i'm SICK. anyways, i'm glad you took your time with it!! it was (as always) worth the wait and i'm p sure i say this every time but perhaps this is my new favorite part???? it's got it all. angst, fluff, communication, their friends, yoongi being sweet, yoongi being a menace, i would keep going but the list will get so long and this is already. A LOT and i don't want tumblr to eat it!!! -loona anon MWAH

LOONA OMFGGGG HI BABE gonna put this under a cut bc it's time to scream back!

WHEN I TELL YOU MY JAW DROPPED WHEN I SAW THE TAGS omfg literally,,,, I DIDN'T EXPECT LIKE ANY OF THEM i was fr already a little feral and a little sweaty tbh. so u can imagine the whiplash when i start reading AND READER IS UPSET </3 but thank GOD for my queen dom <333333 always talking sense into reader!!! i am still literally screaming at her saying "make up with my future brother-in-law"

LMFAOOO i told y'all the warnings were already enough to make me sweat!! and look where we ended up. i don't think anyone knew the extent of my truth there ahahaha. but also, reader baby is upset?? who do i fight oh we're fighting yoongi</333 tragic.

LMAO AND EVEN THOUGH I KNEW THAT YOONGI WAS GOING TO SNEAK IN I STILL COULD NOT BELIEVE MY EYES WHEN I READ IT. i rlly love how this was "i'm yours and you're mine" but make it >:( lmao. yoongi said it best when he said "teach you to think i'm not yours. as if i don't wanna give you my shit so you can walk around everywhere with it on." SCREAMS (cut to yoongi giving reader HIS CHAIN kjgnkdjfgkjd i literally cannot stand it

HAHAHA yes. yoongi managing to surprise us even though his threat about going through a window is right there in writing.... we are the whole circus!! but yeah both of them were just so upset and adorable and i can't stand them actually?? lol.

BUT OH MY GOD RYEN ALL THE SNEAKING AROUND GKJFKJGNDKJG literally saw my life flash before my eyes when bro came in and had to remind myself that This Is Not Real Life Please Breathe. literally every second bro wouldn't LEAVE i was just yelling in my head bc why are you here cockblocking. i love you please GET OUT. then i thought it was over AND NO??????? RYEN. look me in the eyes rn. hold my hands. ARE YOU KIDDING ME. HE KNOCKED ON THE WALL ??????? i can't complain too much bc cockwarming <3 BUT HELP.

the bro interruptions were honestly so FUN to write i was cackling and crying the whole time!! like how does this man know exactly when to ruin a good time his comedic timing was gd hilarious. the fact that you had to take a breath to remind yourself it's not real is so cool?? wtf that's a huge compliment! and the double down is my absolute favorite bc it led to super cute moments :((( but was HORRIFYING when it started happening ahahahaha

and vmin overhearing them when they think they're alone????????? dnkgjkjfdg i'm not strong enough to think too much about reader calling yoongi bitch and what happened right after. i am a weak weak person and you are so evil for making "you're gonna show me how you get off" yoongi GRAMMYS YOONGI. also bratty reader i am SCREAMING. like you're gonna call him bitch then disobey his orders????? "pass." ICON. talking about him being put in his place??? I WOULD PAY TO SEE IT.

I WANT BOTH OF THEM LET ME IN COACH IM SLIDING DOWN THE WALLS BANGING ON THE DOORS. i want vmin too but that's a different story lol. but gOD reader in this was an icon a king a queen a god a goddess all of the praise. to be like that in front of grammys yoongi telling you to show him that? i dunno how reader got the words out lmfao. but the adrenaline rush must have been a huge boost to confidence levels.

(also love how shy he was about it at the end gkjdnkfj like, sir, don't dish what you can't take. u wanna be punished a little, we get it, just say so) but it wouldn't be 3tan yoongi if he wasn't constantly checking in and taking care of reader </3 like when reader thought they heard smth and he said he was watching </3 when he thought they were in subspace and wanted to check </3 idk smth about it made me </3 </3 he's so </3 </3 i would like to end this off by saying i've never read so much smut i wish i could reenact.

PLEASE. YOU GET IT. yoongi being a fcking menace in the control seat but we all know what he wants to see!! he isn't slick at all omfg i'm so sjfjddjks if we ever get to reader's turn? it's over. it's over for everyone involved i may need 28 business days to get through it lol. but yoongi was an absolute sweetheart here. he was mad! he was pissed! but that didn't mean he was gonna disregard the basics like wellbeing and awareness. he knows how to hold himself back and that puts reader in a wonderful position.

WHICH REMINDS ME. YOU'RE TELLING ME??? PEOPLE ARE OUT HERE USING 3TAN AS INSPO FOR THINGS TO DO WITH THEIR PARTNERS??? oh i'm so sick THAT SHOULD BE ME. like i'm glad for u but also jealousy is a disease and i'm SICK.

HAHAHAHA YES LOONA. THERE REALLY ARE PEOPLE OUT HERE DOING JUST THAT AND IM LIVING FOR ITTTT. if i could send you a 3tan yoongi i most definitely would</33

anyways, i'm glad you took your time with it!! it was (as always) worth the wait and i'm p sure i say this every time but perhaps this is my new favorite part???? it's got it all. angst, fluff, communication, their friends, yoongi being sweet, yoongi being a menace, i would keep going but the list will get so long and this is already. A LOT and i don't want tumblr to eat it!!!

i'm screaming?? if this is your new fave part?? hell yeah. that makes me happy bc i didn't think this was on the same level of quality as the others! but if you like it then i'm very satisfied. and you got a point about it having a bit of everything! it's not a holiday special for nothing ehehehe. thank you so much again babe. this made me smile and laugh today LOL ily!

[todayisawthewhxlewxrld]

OMG I JUST HAD THIS RANDO THOUGHT???

ok so im basically deeply in love with inumaki and i just randomly thought ab like imagine being childhood friends with him and u guys get chased by the feral neighborhood dog 😥

(like in a normal au no curses n stuff ur probably around 14-15)

like ur walking home together from a 7/11 slushie trip and a big ass dog starts chasing and you both SCREAMED, running the fucking fastest youve ever ran and inumaki makes it on top a car before you do

ur life flashes before ur eyes as u desperately try to climb onto the car and toge is also desperately trying to pull u on BUT YOU DONT MAKE IT ON THE FIRST TIME 😭😭

so u run in a frantic circle around the car losing a few years of your life everytime the dog nearly chomps down in you all while toge is being COMPLETELY AND UTTERLY USELESS screaming for u on the hood of the car‼️🔥

the second time around toge latches on to u and with the power of friendship youre able to finally climb to safety!!1!1!! ���😍

idk i feel like this is such an inumaki friendship experience

hes so silly n pretty n annoying and i love him

SORRY IF THIS IS TOO MUCH LMAOAOO I KINDA THREW UP THIS SCENARIO IN UR ASK BOX

-🧋

I GIGGLED AT THE WITH THE POWER OF FRIENDSHIP PART HELP ME LORDDDD I LOVED YHIS THIS WAS SO SILLY UGH UR MIND!!!!!!

this reminded me of that one time me and my sister got chased by a chihuahua…. we ended up hiding in her garage for safety…

ANYWAY. i feel like being friends with inumaki means just doing the most random shit ever like why r we under a bridge rn bro

ANYWAY THAT WAS NOT TOO MUCH AT ALL DONT U WORRY I LOVED UR SCENARIO 🫶🫶🫶

[tyrianluda]

So I watched Emesis Blue for the first time today and I wrote my reaction

Here's my reaction

Note: SPOILERS (Obviously), Swearing and mild Simping, Also this is a long post since I had a lot to write

Also the film itself has a lot of blood and gore, as well as flashing lights. Please take this into consideration if you plan on watching it.

(I started writing 23 minutes in)

Love the colors and the use of sound

Having soft and pleasant music for it's most fucked up scenes is an amazing choice

Soldier is still a dumbass but I'm perfectly fine with it

I really like the voice acting, even if you can tell that they are impersonations

Oh god

Scout what the fuck happened to you

(right after) Oh that's what happened to you

Engineer is scaring me rn, his voice

"You look lost, boy" Jesus, that's getting me to shiver in my boots

Scout's voice acting specifically is amazing personally, the screaming feels so painful

"Before you get us killed" 5 seconds before disaster

The camera angles are amazing

The anticipation on some scenes are absolutely chilling

Engineer what the fuck

I should stop flinching when something happens but damn

WHAT THE FUCK WHAT'S WITH THE PIANO

GET HIS ASS MEDIC

OOOOOHHHH THE MUSIC CHANGE

The impact of the hits are so visceral I love it

Medic saying "Nien!" when Engie is about to kill him hits hard

(when Medic is brought back to life) HOLY FUCK HE RESPAWNED

THE FACIAL EXPRESSIONS ARE FUCKING ME UP I SEE THE RAGE AND REVENGE ON MEDIC'S FACE

DAMN

The sigh of relief from medic OMG

It sounds like the voice actors are right next to me when they are breathing heavy or groaning or panting like Bro, I need to be scared, not horny

The argument between spy and soldier is agony bro, it feels like a divorced couple;

"You're gonna shoot me?"

"We're done!"

SNIPER??????

HOLY FUCK IT'S SNIPER

SOLDIER YOU DUMBASS NO

NO

AYO HE (soldier) MADE IT???

SOLDIER YOU DUMBASS I LOVE YOU

"let him bleed" BRUH

soldier? What the fuck is up with you?

(right after) oh

SPY OH GOD

"SOLDIER, DON'T LEAVE ME" *leaves*

the suspense between spy and the masked man oh god

The violence conveyed through the shadow on the wall is amazing. I know this has already been done before but still

The symbolism of the U.S. flag burning behind him is not lost on me

WAR FLASHBACK??? Possible inference of Soldier having PTSD here

DEMOMAN MY GUY :D

THE REPEATED DIALOGUE FROM EARLIER OH DAMN

woah

THE GORE DAMN

the cracking sound effect when soldier picks up the hands is so crunchy

What the

"Goodbye" (on the wall) AH FUCK

The music still pleasant despite the scene being gruesome

I just like the sounds man

DEMOMAN IS AWESOME HERE I LOVE YOU

OH god MEDIC, GET CONTACTS MY GOD

YOOO

I LOVE THE FACIAL EXPRESSIONS FROM HIM (medic) MY GOD

HELIX slander

THE FEAR IN SOLDIER'S EYES UNDER THE HELMET

FUCK OH NO

DEMOMAN AND SOLDIER NO

Medic holy fuck you're the GOAT

the lights buzzing when the... nevermind they turned off

God I feel bad for everyone here jesus christ

HIS LAUGHING IS USUALLY SO UNHINGED AND FUN BUT HERE, IT'S JUST DEPRESSING

"A new car. My own personal assistant. I think I've earned it." JESUS THE CASUAL TALKING DESPITE WHAT HE'S DOING

"I saw the Devil in their eyes" demoman having an line that goes hard

Demoman, my beloved

I forgot to say the writing is amazing

The Shining reference is great right now

Engineer's laugh ..just his laugh...I don't know if I'm scared here or simping

Engineer talking about the respawn is so chilling "It's a purgatory"

I love the aesthetic of this film

"Y/N" I'm getting fanfiction flashbacks

Jules, I saw you for like 5 minutes and I already despise you

"Tata :D" SHUT YOUR ASS UP

The screaming still unnerves me

The callback with the elevator with blood from the start of the film. Also it might be another Shining reference since that was in the movie too

Spy unmasked is kinda attractive ngl, not a great time to say it but still

The baseball possibly being symbolism for Scout and having it be seen when Medic is in emotional distress. I just love symbolism, my bad

The eye contact from Medic looking at the camera like

Medic having delusions from earlier scenes and interactions and having it unnerve him further

WAIT SO THOSE AREN'T DELUSIONS???

WAIT I THINK HE'S STUCK IN A TIME LOOP

the fucked up mercenary designs are amazing and terrifying

Possible religious symbolism with the cross

CLONES. IT'S CLONES

Soldier seeing Demoman again but he's... putting his head against Demo's chest UGH I'M FEELING PAIN AND AGONY AND SADNESS

Soldier unclipping the piece of the grenade OH GOD

MEDIC IS WEARING THE CROSS. I FUCKING KNEW THERE WAS SYMBOLISM

he looks kinda hot with the cross on him. I mean who said that.

I keep repeating this but whatever, I love the voice acting

THE SOUND WHEN MEDIC IS USING THE AXE IS ODDLY SATISFYING WHAT THE HELL

Jules being a war criminal made sense actually given mercenaries IRL are already legally dubious

Spy is speaking facts rn

YESSSS JULES IS DEAD

Spy's face looking burnt and fucked up is oddly aesthetically pleasing

OH GOD THEY'RE DOING RUSSIAN ROULETTE

SOLDIER SAYING 'YOU'RE GONNA MAKE IT" RIGHT BEFORE MEDIC DIES IS PAINFUL

MEDIC

SPY YOU MOTHERFUCKER

I thought the roulette scene would be more drawn out and slow to make the outcome more painful but having it be so quick works well still

"A true enemy has yet to reveal themself."

DEMO, WHAT THE FUCK DOES THAT IMPLY

Soldier being in the place where they dump the corpses and having it resemble the traditional perception of hell, OH GOD

THE SCREAMING IS STILL UNNERVING

I have a feeling the film is doing the "when you stare at the abyss for too long, it stares back at you", when Soldier is looking at him and Scout from earlier

I THINK SOLDIER IS HAVING DELUSIONS TOO LIKE MEDIC

SOLDIER IN CASUAL AND NORMAL CLOTHING WITHOUT THE HELMET FEELS SO WRONG

GOD I FEEL SAD

THE MANN BROTHERS

"I need you to sit down." BRUH HE'S ALREADY SITTING ON A WHEELCHAIR

THE ARGUMENT BETWEEN THE BROTHERS BEING PETTY AS FUCK IS FUNNY

(I PAUSED TO MAKE A GUESS. SOLDIER IS NOT GONNA FOLLOW THE SCRIPT)

(I FUCKING KNEW IT)

SOLDIER LOOKING AT THE MASKED SPY WITH SUCH ANGER WHEN SPEAKING INACCURATELY ABOUT JULES'S DEATH. COMPLETELY UNDERSTANDABLE

"Did you kill him?" I'M ROOTING FOR THE OLD MFS

(NEVERMIND WTF WAS I THINKING)

MEDIC YES

HE FUCKING SHOT SPY

DAMN MEDIC LOOKS GHASTLY

(I PAUSED AGAIN TO PUT ALL MY THOUGHTS IN ORDER)

MEDIC REALLY JUST SHOT A GUY AND LEFT THE FUNERAL HOME WITHOUT A WORD

MEDIC'S FUCKING THOUSAND YARD STARE

"I OUTLIVED YOU BROTHER >:D" *dies right after*

THE COMEDY AND HORROR IN THIS FILM IS AMAZING

ENGINEER'S VOICE IS ASMR RN AND I DON'T KNOW WHY

THE PIANO CHORDS FROM EARLIER YOOO

THIS IS ABSOLUTELY A SHINING REFERENCE

ENGINEER, YOU SON OF A BITCH

also I never said this yet but the cinematography is spectacular

The silence is unnerving me rn

JULES????

(At the scene where it turns out Medic died driving the ambulance)

...holy fuck

CHAD PAYNE, I LOVE YOUR WRITING AND DIRECTION AND VOICE ACTING AND-

[saturnheart]

She took this moment as a chance to take in her younger brother’s ragged appearance, at first glance he looked like he normally did; exhausted. But taking the time to really study him, she knew Carmy was doing worse than he’d ever admit.

💔older sister thingsss

The discoloration under his eyes was the worst Nat had seen it, the deep blue-purple bruising a sign that he was getting even less sleep than he usually did.

poor guys going THROUGH it

She would find him just standing in the restaurant, sometimes eyes staring into nothing as he worried the pendant between his fingers, oftentimes raising it to his lips before letting it go completely and wandering to do whatever task needed to be done.

this!! it kills me like bro really has this pendant and it’s like what keeps him going?? like i find it kinda cute tho (like give me a man who wears my initial 🙄😐🥲)

“That I’m pregnant.” Her final words were spoken just loud enough to alert the crew to her news.

surpiseeeee shawtyyyyy

Nat watched as the two men locked eyes, not too keen on playing referee for these two again. She looked in Carmy’s direction as Richie began making his way over, trying to gauge what was going through her little brother's mind.

these children i swear

“Carmen,” Richie nodded in acknowledgment to Carmy. Richie would be lying if he said he wasn’t purposefully using Carmy’s government name to rile him up, he knew how much Carmy hated it when you did it, and since you weren’t here someone had to uphold the tradition.

i can picture them already LMAO

“I don’t like your tone, Carmen,”

😭

“all I’m sayin’ is Mikey didn’t trademark it whoever did might…I dunno hypothetically deserve an apology in return for said documents.”

richie #1 baby defender !!

“Cat’s out of the bag! Our pregnancy is no longer top secret!”

AWWW PETEEEE

“Nat’s my partner you know? And I’m so grateful for her providing me the opportunity to be a father. Allowing me to build with her, for us to come together and bring a child into this world, it’s a beautiful thing I love her ya know.”

stop he loves her so muchhhh!!!

“Nat she uh…she confided in me about how she always wanted to be the one to throw you a shower if you ever decided to have children. And if-when we had our own she’d want you to be in charge of hers…if you wanted to not like she would force you.”

they’re sisters no matter what 🥹🤍 i’m really glad baby has someone like nat (and pete) but i also feel like sugar needed someone like baby since she grew up with just mikey and carmy + richie was probably one of those friends that was always at their house.

“But Pete was so positive and always looking at life and your situation with a ‘glass half full’ mentality, that his constant belief in you helped to make the hard days easier.”

he’s so needed in that family like he’s adds in a little fun and positivity

“Pete, do you think you could give me Carmen’s number?” You tried not to roll your eyes as you saw Pete’s own light up, you were almost positive he would be telling Nat about this topic of conversation.

🤭🤭

Pete laughed, “He never answers my calls anyway.”

😂😭

I just, whatever is going on between you and Carmen, it’s affecting Nat. And she won’t tell you because you deserve to feel how you feel, but with the baby and the restaurant…she doesn’t need to play "Fix it Felix” with you and Carmen right now.”

WELL SAID PETE 😭 WIFEY NEEDS A BREAK!!!!

“You still fuckin with that lil dumbass boy?” The question caused you to choke on the last bit of cocoa in your cup.

😭😭 he’s so real

“Listen I know we ain’t sposed to have like personal relationships and shit, but lemme know what homeboy looks like I’ll get my goons on em’ for you.” Your head fell back in laughter as Cortez raised his fist to under both of his eyes.

i like this guy LMAO

Carmen stopped in his tracks, eyes finding your figure across the street. You were in front of the church that held the Al-Anon meetings he told you about.

omg

He felt the air leave his lungs as your name flashed across his screen, he realized just how indecent setting that Polaroid picture of you with his chain on might have been now that he was in public, but it’s not like he ever thought you’d call him.

each mention of the polaroids i die a little like.. 🥲

He scrolled through the messages eyes reading over your message with details about a baby shower, your address included.

i can’t wait for the baby shower !!! i’m hoping and praying it’s a sweet time (no drama pls) but whatever you have planned will be GOOD 😭😂

But here he was with a message from you, and a missed call and he wasn’t sure how to take any of it.

sighs

‘Hey Carmen, uh it’s me…Baby. Not sure why I introduced myself. I'm sure you know it’s me.” Carmy let out a watery chuckle at the sound of your voice, even if he hadn't saved your number the delicate timber of your voice would’ve been enough for him.

catch him replaying this voicemail every morning now after receiving it

“I know you have issues with girls actually having your number…Sorry, that was actually kind of rude.”

baby no.. that was actually well deserved for him

“but I think we both deserve a chance to explain our side of things. I um…I also have some things I think you should know. Just, if this is something you’re interested in, you have my number.”

it’s coming soon…. i cannot wait like even if it leaves me in tears

You lived about 30 minutes from where he was, he was confident he could get there in 20 and spare the 10 minutes at a store near you.

i know he’s a chef but i love that he like immediately chooses that he needs to make dinner for her like i know for sure his love language is acts of service like bros here calculating time on how long it will take to get to her place then the grocery market like breatheeee dude

He was nervous, maybe showing up at your house to cook you dinner wasn’t his most thought-out plan but he needed you desperately, needed to see you, be in your presence, and know that there was still a chance of something more between the two of you.

bro 😭😭

the pendant delicately resting against his chest felt warm. Carmen was adamant that he would admit his love for you tonight, unsure if he could go another day living with the fact that you were in love with him, but you still didn’t know just how much he had always loved you. You were so blissfully unaware that since he could remember, you had been the one and only option in his mind.

BROOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO 😭🤍

chapter seven | they know i believed in us last week

masterlist | ↢ previous chapter | next chapter ↣

pairing: carmen berzatto x fem!reader | platonic!pete x fem!reader | male!oc x fem!reader |

summary: carmy struggles to deal with your absence in his life, while you finally learn to live without him.

warning(s): talk about miscarriage (no explicit details) | word miscarriage used once | implied suicidal thoughts | substance abuse | NA | AA | Al-Anon | grief | mention of pregnancy |angst | drama | semi-fluff | language | sad boi carm | baby being mature | woe is me carmy | please let me know if i missed anything |

wc: 7.3k

song rec: i'll still have me - cyn, aquilo

semi-edited/proof-read

“Carm hey, are you listening?” Natalie’s eyes flitted across Carmy’s face, his blank eyes staring directly past her. She took this moment as a chance to take in her younger brother’s ragged appearance, at first glance he looked like he normally did; exhausted. But taking the time to really study him, she knew Carmy was doing worse than he’d ever admit.

His usual textured and fluffy hair was limp against his head, the greasy quality of it proving he needed a wash. The discoloration under his eyes was the worst Nat had seen it, the deep blue-purple bruising a sign that he was getting even less sleep than he usually did. The skin of his lips was dehydrated and bitten to pieces, a tick he had as a child that gradually calmed down as he grew older. And the visible stubble on his chin was enough to know that the absence of your presence in his life was hitting him harder than anyone expected.

Her eyes caught on the chain that was haphazardly peeking out of his shirt, squinting at the newly added pendant hanging from it. Natalie didn’t have to be a genius to know whose initial hung around Carmen’s neck, the chain which was usually safely tucked into his shirt was now blatantly on show for everyone to see. Natalie had noticed it more recently since your and Carmy’s argument, though this was her first time seeing it this close. She would find him just standing in the restaurant, sometimes eyes staring into nothing as he worried the pendant between his fingers, oftentimes raising it to his lips before letting it go completely and wandering to do whatever task needed to be done.

Natalie’s concern was palpable but the discomfort in her abdomen was worse. “Have you tried talking to her?” The shaky breath she let out filtered between the two of them.

Carmen’s eyes finally snapped to hers taking in the uncomfortable expression on her face, “Sug?” He waited for Nat to focus on him. “You good?” The question hung in the air as Natalie tried to even out her breathing.

Using his sister's obvious discomfort to deflect from the conversation she was insistent on having wasn’t the nicest thing to do, but he’d rather put his sister’s well-being before being forced to think about how long it had been since he last spoke to you; he last saw you.

Carmy watched as Sug raised a closed hand to her mouth suppressing the urge to gag. “Yeah good, I’m good.” The forced smile on her lips did nothing to fool Carmy, but he wouldn’t force the issue.

“Can you uh, explain to me again how we’re doing, I spaced.” His fingers raised to run through his hair a small grimace painting his face at the grime he could feel left behind on his fingertips.

“Seven weeks out, Carm, and still so much to be done,” An exhausted sigh breathed through Natalie’s lips. The stress opening this restaurant caused felt extremely unnecessary considering her current status.

“No yeah I heard that,” Carmy nodded his head rapidly, Sug’s words slowly coming back to him. He squinted his eyes, hand scratching the grown-out stubble on his chin.  “You uh said something about the DBA getting rejected?”

“About that.” Natalie’s voice trailed off one hand pressing into her abdomen to ease the ache, “The name’s taken.”

Nat watched as Carmy processed the words, her discomfort felt like it was increasing as the seconds passed by.

“Who the fuck could’ve taken the name?” The idea perplexed Carmy. There was no chance another business could have the same name, well there was, it was just slim as hell.

Nat shrugged just as confused as Carmy “It’s been trademarked for years, whoever filed has all legal rights to the name.”

“Fuck me!” The pitch of Carmy’s voice rose along with his irritation.

Natalie’s own mumbled expletive was drowned out by Carmy’s outburst, the nauseating morning sickness she was experiencing came in an extra hard bout today.

“Yo, Sug…Sug. You sure you’re okay?” Carmy’s concern now outweighed his confusion, Nat’s weird behavior this whole morning was beginning to worry him.

“I can do this Carmy right, tell me I can do this.” Natalie’s breathing began to increase as a slight panic flooded through her. Carmy watched her with wide eyes, no idea what she could even be talking about.

“Tell me I can do it, Carm!” The wave of nausea subsided with her yell, Carmy’s hands raised in the air to divert blame.

“Fuck okay! You can do it Sug.”

“I am…completely terrified. And I’m only telling you because..I don’t know. Just-just in case.” Natalie nodded to herself as a way to provide her nerves with courage.

Carmy just stared at Natalie still not following where she was leading this conversation to.

“I really want this to be loving and good and happy,” A smile rose to Nat’s face “I just..I don’t want anyone to know…well besides Baby and now you.”

Carmy’s eyes focused on Sug’s abdomen, the pieces of the puzzle slowly fitting together in his head. The name she spoke felt like it was echoing through his ears.

“Sure” He wasn’t sure how to react to the news, he had always assumed Natalie would be the first of the siblings to start a family. And as the years passed by he knew it was a desire he himself had.

“I really don’t want Richie to know. Because somehow, it feels more in my control when and who knows…” The sound of the wall falling caused Nat to raise her voice as she finished her sentence. “That I’m pregnant.” Her final words were spoken just loud enough to alert the crew to her news.

“I fuckin’ knew it.” The sound of Richie’s shout grated on Nat’s nerves, but the quiet congratulations helped to ease her ire a bit.

Carmy was happy for Sugar, but it felt like it was setback after setback for the restaurant and all the personal issues he was dealing with weren't helping his stress. He felt his shoulders sag a bit mind racing as to how the name could already be trademarked, or who would’ve trademarked it.

His eyes found Richie’s as the man cajoled about how he knew Natalie was pregnant this whole time. Had Richie told someone the name and they took it for themselves? Did Mikey somehow trademark it while on a bender? The thought made Carmy’s head hurt what the fuck even was the point of opening this restaurant if they couldn’t use the name. The name was the epitome of the restaurant.

If you were here Carmy knew you would've given him an analogy for how he was feeling, you would’ve told him he was like Atlas holding up the sky or whatever he did. He shook his head trying to rid himself of thoughts of you, it wasn’t helping him in the least.

As much as he’d rather not converse with Richie, he needed to get to the bottom of this trademark business.

“Yo, Cousin!” The words felt wrong escaping Carmy’s lips the two men avoided each other in the same way you avoided Carmen.

The agitation on Richie’s face was instant, Carmy knew he fucked up with you, but the cold shoulder he was getting from Richie felt unnecessary.

Nat watched as the two men locked eyes, not too keen on playing referee for these two again. She looked in Carmy’s direction as Richie began making his way over, trying to gauge what was going through her little brother's mind.

“Carmen,” Richie nodded in acknowledgment to Carmy. Richie would be lying if he said he wasn’t purposefully using Carmy’s government name to rile him up, he knew how much Carmy hated it when you did it, and since you weren’t here someone had to uphold the tradition.

Carmy felt his eye twitch Richie’s immaturity since the argument with you felt never-ending. “Did Mikey ever trademark the name?”

Richie frowned looking between him and Nat the assumption that he had any goddamn clue laughable “What the fuck did Mikey look like trademarking shit? Wasn’t I just slangin’ crack to keep the lights on?”

Carmy’s eyes shut as Nat let out a quiet gasp, watching as Richie raised his hands in defense. Maybe running a back alley drug ring wasn’t the best for business, but without it, they may not have been in this moment renovating the restaurant.

“Well someone fucking trademarked it, Richie.” The attitude Carmy was catching was wholly unwelcome.

“I don’t like your tone, Carmen,” Richie matched Carmy’s energy giving him what he was getting. “All I’m sayin’ is Mikey didn’t trademark it whoever did might…I dunno hypothetically deserve an apology in return for said documents.”

Carmy was at his wits end with the older man “Oh so you’re the fucking Riddler now.”

“Baby trademarked the name?” Nat’s voice traveled between the trio at the same time as Carmen’s snarky remark. Carmy’s head shot to her, confused as to how she concluded you had anything to do with the conversation at hand.

“Bingo!” Richie’s hands came together in a loud clap Sydney rolled her eyes at the obnoxious man before looking over the various work orders. “She did that shit years ago and gave it to Mikey as a present, he…left it for her when he passed.”

A quiet fell over their small group, each of them taking in the gesture. Richie had only become privy to the present when he went through the office to try and make sense of what the hell Mikey was doing to keep the business up and running. He had knocked a framed picture of your group off the desk cleaning up the mess only to find the folded trademark document in the back of the broken picture frame.

Your name was haphazardly scribbled into the back of it.

Carmen’s chest heaved as he let the news wash over him, it seemed since the two of you had your falling out the universe was continuously pushing him to interact with you. He raised his hand to his face, rubbing it up and down as he added another item to the long list of things going wrong with the restaurant.

In a way, learning that you were responsible for trademarking the name made Carmy’s chest feel warm. It felt like you wanted this for Mikey just as much as he did, the two of you both supporting Mikey in ways the other never knew. It also gave him an excuse to speak with you, not that he needed one. If he was a better man he would’ve already worked up the courage to reach out to you. He could feel a headache coming on the more he thought about trying to fix things with you.

Carmen was sure he’d figure things out soon, he wasn’t sure how much longer he could figure things out with you not by his side. Which he would admit was quite ironic considering all the times he had willingly pushed you away. But being pushed away by you had proven to him just how badly he was screwing things up with you, to hear you be so upset by his actions he basically forced you into confessing your love stung him to his core.

Carmy wasn’t exactly sure what love was supposed to feel like, but he was almost positive it wasn’t this. The ache in his chest from not being around you, looking for you in every crowd he was in. Soaking up any conversation your name was mentioned in. Maybe he did know what love was supposed to feel like, because for all the time he had been in love with you, he had never once felt so completely and utterly broken as he had been since not fighting for your love a year ago like he should have.

“That was Nat,” you looked up as Pete returned to the table, a smile growing on your face at how happy he looked to have been speaking with his wife. “Cat’s out of the bag! Our pregnancy is no longer top secret!”

Pete’s excitement was contagious, your smile growing wider at his pure joy. “Our pregnancy?” You chuckled never having heard anyone refer to it as if the pregnancy was shared.

You watched as Pete sipped the water in front of him, a signature goofy smile back on his face. “Of course! I mean yeah Nat is carrying the baby, but I’m just as pregnant as she is.” You gave Pete a confused look, a laugh bubbling out of you.

“You laugh now Baby, but I’m serious.” Pete paused as the waiter brought out the bread for your table, both of you quickly thanking them. “Nat’s my partner you know? And I’m so grateful for her providing me the opportunity to be a father. Allowing me to build with her, for us to come together and bring a child into this world, it’s a beautiful thing I love her ya know.”

The sheen in Pete’s eyes was enough to make you emotional you didn’t need to hear his explanation to know how much Pete loved Natalie, you could just see it in the way he looked at her, in the way his face would light up when anyone would mention her name or ask about her.

“I’m happy that Nat has someone like you to build a life with.” Both you and Pete shared misty-eyed smiles, chuckles leaving each of you at how emotional the small things made both of you.

“Looks like that dinner you were planning just turned into a full-blown baby shower!” The loud clap Pete’s hands made startled you. “Wow, it really will be a Baby shower!”

You watched as Pete laughed at his own pun, doing your best not to laugh along with him and encourage his bad jokes. The relationship you developed with Pete was a bit weird in the beginning, you weren’t the most open to the idea, and it’s not because you didn’t like Pete, it just felt like you were replacing Mikey.

It took a while before you could look at Pete and realize he wasn’t trying to replace Mikey’s role in your life, and that the drugs and paranoia had driven you to that conclusion. Pete was a great man, standing by Natalie’s side while she fought to keep you alive. Probably being more accepting than someone else may have been when he and Nat decided to help you. Pete and Natalie both put aside their own lives to help you get better, and get back on your feet, and while part of you wished Mikey was around to ground you as well, Pete’s love and kindness didn’t deserve to be taken for granted.

“That dinner was supposed to be a surprise for you too Peter,” you shot him a tiny glare before reaching for some bread. “I just wanted you both to have a nice night off together, no stress.” The reservation had already been made, but thinking about Pete’s words and the excitement when explaining most everyone knew about the pregnancy, maybe it would have been best for an intimate shower for the two soon-to-be parents.

Pete was definitely a family guy and Natalie came from a big family, maybe a shower would be for the best. Surround them with people who loved and supported them and just allow everyone to bask in the happiness the joyous news brought, you were sure everyone could use a break.

“Okay hypothetically say I put together a small shower for the two of you, is that even something Nat would want?” Sure you knew Nat but Pete was her husband and this was their moment, you didn’t want to ambush her with a party she never wanted.

You watched Pete bristle a little, a nervous smile raised to his lips, “I uh I’m not sure if Nat ever told you but she kinda had this…this whole dream about the two of you,” you frowned confused at what Pete was talking about.

“Well not like an unconscious sleeping dream, more like a-an idea?” Pete’s voice rose at the end of his sentence, not sure if the question in his tone was meant for you or him.

“Pete bud you lost me.” You gave him a small nod of encouragement awaiting his response.

“Um so…after your uh…loss,” a sad smile rose to Pete’s lips, you could see the apology in his eyes. “Nat she uh…she confided in me about how she always wanted to be the one to throw you a shower if you ever decided to have children. And if-when we had our own she’d want you to be in charge of hers…if you wanted to not like she would force you.” The nervous huff of laughter from Pete hung in the air for a minute.

The admission perplexed you, Nat had never brought this up to you directly and maybe it was because she felt like she couldn’t. You weren’t the most open when it came to the topic of your miscarriage always avoiding the conversation whenever Nat tried to breach it.

“Baby…you’re the closest thing Natalie has to a sister. I can promise she would be ecstatic no matter what decision you choose.”

You nodded, the motion happened unconsciously as you tried to take in everything Pete had laid on you. Of course, there were things Nat wouldn’t share with you, but while the two of you were like sisters you didn’t expect her to share every little detail with you. As you let Pete’s words digest you couldn’t help the warm feeling beginning to flood through your body, if you were being honest you weren’t sure if it was the best idea to be throwing anyone a baby shower, but you also knew Natalie deserved to be celebrated, not only for the life she and Pete were creating together, but also for all the work she was doing to ensure that The Bear had a fighting chance.

“Okay,” your head continued its up-and-down motion. “Yeah okay let’s do it but I’m going to need your help, Pete.” You watched the smile on his face increase tenfold, your own wide smile spreading your lips due to how contagious Pete’s joy was.

“Anything and I mean anything Baby, I am your guy.” Pete’s giddiness warmed you even more, you didn’t think you had ever been surrounded by anyone with such a positive attitude before. In the beginning, when Natalie and Pete first began dating, his electric personality was a bit much but you found yourself always trying to make Pete feel included, especially with how off-putting the rest of the Berzatto clan could be.

And when you were recovering it was almost like you had to re-acclimate yourself to Pete’s personality. Your recovery was hard, there were some days you weren’t even sure if you wanted to get better or if you wanted oxygen to continue filling your lungs. But Pete was so positive and always looking at life and your situation with a ‘glass half full’ mentality, that his constant belief in you helped to make the hard days easier.

A small sigh escaped your lips as you readied yourself for the question you were about to ask. “Pete, do you think you could give me Carmen’s number?” You tried not to roll your eyes as you saw Pete’s own light up, you were almost positive he would be telling Nat about this topic of conversation. “Before you get any ideas, I just need it to invite him to the shower.” You raised your hands in defense hoping Pete wouldn’t look into this any more than he already was.

“No can do B, the idea train has already left the station.” His fingers drummed on the table with excitement. “But I will do you one better,” you frowned as you watched Pete pick up his phone, fingers skating across the screen before he held it up to show you. A call to Carmen already going through as Pete sent you a thumbs-up.

You looked at the screen eyes wide, the shock temporarily paralyzed for a moment. The quiet sound of the ringing between the two of you brought you back. “Pete! Hang up the phone.” Your voice was terse as you spoke trying not to draw too much attention from other patrons.

Pete laughed, “He never answers my calls anyway.” Pete’s words irritated you, but you were glad to see the call go to voicemail before Pete pressed the end call button and set his phone down.

You let out a surprised laugh, Pete had definitely been too influenced by the Berzattos during his time with Natalie. The little stunt he just pulled was something you knew both Richie and Mikey would do if given the chance.

“Baby?” Your head raised eyes meeting Pete’s, “I know this may sound selfish, but I…I need you to figure out this thing between you and Carmen.” Your eyebrows furrowed the need to defend yourself hitting you full force, you opened your mouth to respond but stopped as Pete raised his hand, a signal to let him continue.

“I know Baby, I know. I’ll be honest with you, as much as I love Nat’s family I think you should’ve given up on Carmen a long time ago.” Your jaw fell slack, and Pete’s eyes widened a bit. “No, no just for your own wellbeing, your peace of mind.” You began nodding as Pete explained himself better. “I just, whatever is going on between you and Carmen, it’s affecting Nat. And she won’t tell you because you deserve to feel how you feel, but with the baby and the restaurant…she doesn’t need to play "Fix it Felix” with you and Carmen right now.”

You let out a small chuckle at Pete’s explanation, over the years he had begun expressing himself to you more. You being the only one on Natalie’s side who actually gave him the time of day and willfully listened to him, helped him to gain more confidence when around the rest of the Berzattos. You reached for your glass of water, taking a long sip before setting it down.

“Thank you, Pete, for being honest,” you sighed, finger playing with the condensation on your cup. “If I’m being honest, it's easy to forget that Nat’s in the middle of everything. She’s so good at pretending it doesn’t affect her.” A rueful smile rose to your lips, as great as a friend as Natalie had been to you through everything, you weren’t sure the same could be said for yourself. “You’re right, Carmen and I are adults, we should be able to figure this out ourselves. I’ll…I’ll call him, figure things out.” You sent Pete a small smile.

Recently it felt like Natalie and Pete nursed you back to health and then for some reason became your surrogate parents. You didn’t think there was anything wrong with leaning on them, the three of you did endure a traumatic experience together so it was understandable. But maybe you had become too comfortable and relied on them too much to ‘fix’ your life. You could understand where Pete was coming from and he had every right to put his wife’s well-being before the feelings of his friends.

You knew Natalie and Pete would be amazing parents and of course, Nat’s fears were valid. But you had seen firsthand just how loving, caring, and kind the couple was, and while that wasn’t all that went into raising a child it was like a part of you just knew that their child would be in great hands.

“Enough about my poor life choices Pete, have you guys thought of any names?” The timing of the question couldn’t have been more perfect, Pete perked up at the question, eyes glazing over with excitement. A waiter stopped by your table to deliver your entrees as Pete began animatedly explaining his and Nat’s process for picking names.

A part of you ached at how happy Pete was, if things were different, maybe in another life you would’ve been able to see that excitement on another man’s face. Maybe the two of you would’ve come up with your own system for picking out names.

You listened as lunch continued, no matter how many times the thought had crossed your mind, you would always be grateful that Natalie had found a partner to love her in the ways she deserved.

 It was silent between you and Cortez as you made your second lap around the block, the church in the distance behind you. Your hands were preoccupied with a warm disposable cup of hot cocoa as Cortez gingerly sipped his choice of tea. This had become the routine for your meetings with your sponsor, the two of you would meet at the bodega a little ways away from the church that housed both AA and NA meetings. Then continue your meeting with a few circles around the block before ending at the church stairs when all was said and done.

The air was tense between the two of you, Cortez hadn’t taken kindly to your decision to skip out on the few check-ins that you had asked for. In the beginning, you were in constant contact with Cortez, feeling the match between the two of you out. As you progressed through recovery and got back into the routine of daily life the daily talks between the two of you began to dwindle as you settled into life as a recovering addict.

But after that initial meeting at The Beef, being in Carmen’s presence again, surrounding yourself with Richie and the life you once knew, the meetings with Cortez picked back up in frequency. And you were doing fine for some time, the man meeting with you when you needed it, always willing to speak with you whenever you asked and it was helpful, god was it helpful. But then you made it to step nine, step eight in the recovery program was its own monster that Cortez helped you through especially when it came to who didn’t need to be on your list.

You made the decision to text Cortez after admitting your faults to Richie. As great as it felt to finally be open with Richie and let him into your life, it also brought with it the urge to use again. Richie had been kind enough to take the bottle of champagne off your hands that night, but the desire to call Fak and ask if Theo had anything he could spare almost won out. But as you scrolled through your contacts the red icon hovering over the voicemail tab brought you back to your senses.

“So your friend Richie knows?” Your eyes shot to Cortez taking in his side profile before focusing back on their attention focused on the steaming paper cup of coffee gripped in their hands.

“Yeah, his daughter kind of spilled the beans.” You nodded playing with the frayed edges of your jeans.

“That’s a bit fucked up don’t cha think?” Cortez’s brows furrowed. “I mean how does his little girl know but he don’t that’s gotta hurt.”

You rolled your eyes, “Aren’t you supposed to like not be judgmental?” Cortez’s laugh felt like it was grating on your ears, as good a sponsor as he was, he had the personality of an annoying older brother you were happy not to have.

“It ain’t even judgment though, it’s an observation.” You didn’t have to be looking at him to know that annoying smirk was on his lips as he shrugged his shoulders.

You stopped as Cortez dropped his now empty cup in a trash bin on the street, “Didn’t know you received your inspector gadget certification.”

“That smart ass mouth is bouta be the reason you out here looking for a new sponsor,” you let out a cackle before taking a much-needed sip of your hot cocoa. “Sound like my daughter with that dumb shit.” If you didn’t know the man who was walking by your side, you would’ve thought he was actually upset, but you could tell by the uptick of his lips he didn’t take anything to heart.

The two of you rounded the corner coming up on the church. You watched as Cortez plopped his long limbs down on one of the steps, opting to sit on the railing. Cortez took out his pack of cigarettes bringing the box to his mouth and removing one before offering the box in your direction. You slipped one out a small laugh escaped you at the irony of everything, how you had once been so against the cancer sticks that those around you would make sure not to smoke around you. And then instead of indulging in a nicotine addiction, you turned to alcohol and prescription pills, the fact that you would smoke a cigarette here and there to appease your urges now felt a bit comical.

You leaned forward allowing Cortez to light your cigarette, “Man ain’t nothin’ like smoking on Big G’s doorstep.” Cortez’s voice filled the silence that had settled over the two of you, you took a drag of the cigarette, a small chuckle escaping you with the smoke.

“I used to hate these fucking things.” The disgust on your face was obvious even as the stick hung from your mouth.

“Why you take one every time I offer 'em’ then?” Cortez switched positions leaning his elbows on the step behind him as he stretched his long limbs out in front of them, offering a wave to the few people entering the church for whatever meeting was scheduled to take place.

You shrugged eyes falling to Cortez’s beat-up boots as you sucked the nicotine deep into your lungs, “They’re the same brand Mikey smoked.”

“Damn ma, that shits kinda sad.” The two of you locked eyes before small laughs left the both of you. You had been around Cortez for so long that you’d picked up on his need to turn most anything into a joke. And while in the beginning, it pissed you off, you realized that’s just who he was and that sometimes being able to laugh in serious moments or at your trauma was helpful.

“Nah seriously though better smokin’ these than messin’ with that shit that hooked you in the first place. Know what I mean?” You nodded, finishing off the cigarette in your hand before taking the second cigarette Cortez offered. You knew how these things went and had spent so much time with the man that you learned to read him. Cortez only ever smoked two cigarettes and offered you two if the conversation was gonna be a rough one.

“Where you at with them apologies?” You sighed letting the man light your cigarette one more time, allowing the fumes to warm your lungs.

You dropped from your seat on the railing, your backside had gone numb. You settled yourself to lean against the railing “I mean I told Richie the truth and there were a lot of apologies in that conversation. But I feel like he deserves a better apology.” You shrugged, your attention dropping to Cortez as he listened.

“Ima be honest wit chu, this might be the hardest part of recovery. Shit I know it was f’me admittin’ to my little girl her father was a fuckin’ junkie. But at the end of the day, you gotta remember this recovery shit is for you. If homeboy loves you like a sister like you say he does, all that should matter to him is that yo annoyin’ ass still here. A’ight, ma?” You listened, nodding along to his words. “All you can do is apologize for the shit you did, you can’t control whether people forgive you or not, and remember ain’t nobody gotta fuck with your apology if they don’t want to.”

You let Cortez’s words settle into you, to anyone else his words may not have seemed genuine but this is just who Cortez was. And you knew no matter how nonchalant he sounded he was speaking every word from his heart.

“You still fuckin with that lil dumbass boy?” The question caused you to choke on the last bit of cocoa in your cup.

“We had a falling out, he’s one of the people I have to apologize to though.” The cigarette between your fingers continued to burn. “There’s a lot I still haven’t told him…the substance abuse, the reasons behind my overdose.” An exhausted sigh pushed its way through your lips. It was like one thing after another when it came to you and Carmy.

“Listen I know we ain’t sposed to have like personal relationships and shit, but lemme know what homeboy looks like I’ll get my goons on em’ for you.” Your head fell back in laughter as Cortez raised his fist to under both of his eyes.

“No goons Cortez, please. Wait, have you ever actually put a hit on somebody before?” You obviously didn’t know Cortez as well as you would have if the two of you were friends. But it wasn’t hard to tell that he would get down if need be.

“Why someone say somethin’?” The two of you shared a laugh, the now more frequent people entering the church signifying that your time together was coming to an end.

“Aight, I gotta head in, get shit set up in there. But ima send you the info for Nar-Anon you give that shit to people who still choose to put up with yo ass. You comin' in?”

You shook your head sending him a small smile, “I came to the morning meetings today.”

You nodded in thanks as Cortez stood up, pushing yourself off the railing. You placed the cigarette between your lips leaving your hands open to do the handshake Cortez insisted you did after each meeting. When he first introduced it you were still getting used to the idea of being a recovering addict and thought he was fucking crazy. But you realized he used it as a way to break the serious desolate feeling that some of these meetings ended on, to help bring some light to what was such a dark reality.

At least that’s how he explained it to you, but you were sure he just liked doing the handshake his daughter helped him come up with.

“Ima see you when I see you ma stay straight.” You chuckled before turning on your heel to head to your parked car. Putting the bud of the cigarette out against the trash bin you passed. It was still early, enough time for you to knock out some baby shower shopping before it got too late.

Carmen stopped in his tracks, eyes finding your figure across the street. You were in front of the church that held the Al-Anon meetings he told you about. Maybe you would be attending the one he was here for, his eyes traveled to the man sitting on the steps you were talking to eyebrows furrowing as he realized the vapors leaving your mouth weren’t from your warm temperature, but instead the stick you had raised to your mouth.

“Baby?” The question left his lips in a quiet whisper, he knew it was you standing across the street but it had been a few weeks since your last interaction he was sure he had imagined you. But he would know you anywhere, by scent alone. He couldn’t help the shock at watching you smoke, something you had been so opposed to since the two of you were children. Even going so far as telling Carmy you couldn’t be friends when he smoked his first cigarette at 15, the stalemate barely lasted a day after you realized how dumb the idea was.

Carmy watched as the two of you stood up, his hopes to see you inside dwindling as he watched the two of you begin to part ways, an intricate handshake taking place before you turned to leave. He watched as your figure disappeared around the corner, a quiet ‘shit’ leaving his lips before he darted across the street trying to catch you before you were gone for good.

“Baby! Hey!” His shouts were useless, you were too far gone to have even heard him. “Fuck!” One hand raised to sit on the bill of his cap, the universe seemed like it was doing everything in its power to keep the two of you apart. Or maybe it was just the way things were meant to be.

Carmy turned to see the man you were with still standing in the same spot you left him, eyes narrowed as he took in Carmy’s figure. The man eyed Carmy for a moment longer, sending a head nod his way before turning and entering the church. Carmy was tempted to follow the man and ask about you, but whatever your relationship with the unknown man was, it was none of Carmy’s business.

He sighed eyes shooting up to the sky before taking a deep breath and making his way inside, not wanting to be late and disturb the Al-Anon meeting before it began. Carmy made his way to the room where the meeting usually took place, eyes landing on the same man from outside once more as he greeted members, the sign near the door he stood by signifying it was an NA meeting. Carmy stopped for a moment, eyes darting between the man and the sign he’d just read.

“You lost kid?” Carmy looked at the man brown furrowed as he shook his head, he sent a tight smile the man's way before walking two doors down for his own meeting. Carmen’s brain felt like it was racing a mile a minute. If you weren’t coming to the Al-Anon meeting, why were you here? And why were you talking with someone who appeared to be leading NA meetings?

The vibrating of his phone caught his attention, the device easily slipped out of his pocket. He felt the air leave his lungs as your name flashed across his screen, he realized just how indecent setting that Polaroid picture of you with his chain on might have been now that he was in public, but it’s not like he ever thought you’d call him.

How’d you even get his number?

“Carmen, hey, we’re about to start your coming?” His head shot up to one of the usual who attended these meetings and would talk to him on occasion.

“Yeah uh, just give me a minute.” Carmy gave a tight smile, eyes flashing back to his phone finger moving to swipe across the screen, the call abruptly ending before he even got the chance to hear your voice. Carmen was sure he had the worst luck in the world, a defeated sigh leaving him, he was almost positive there was no chance you were calling him back.

Quickly putting his phone on Do Not Disturb and in the safety of his jacket pocket, he entered the meeting, as much as he wanted to drop everything and fix things with you. He wasn’t even sure what you had called him for. Carmen also knew it was for the best to attend the meeting,

Carmen was sitting in his car allowing it to warm up as he waited. The skyline began to reflect the sunset, the time on the dashboard letting him know it was around dinner time. He fished his phone out of his pocket mindlessly checking the notifications he’d gotten while in the meeting.

Carmy’s brows furrowed at the flurry of messages he received from a group chat he wasn’t aware he was a part of. He frowned as he opened it, your contact is one of the many in the text chain. The only contact with a photo was yours, making you easily distinguishable, he realized the rest of the people in the chat were the restaurant crew. He scrolled through the messages eyes reading over your message with details about a baby shower, your address included.

Carmy exited out of his messages, unsure of how things were between the two of you. It had been three weeks since the argument and neither of you had tried contacting the other. But here he was with a message from you, and a missed call and he wasn’t sure how to take any of it.

He decided it was a good idea to call you back, and try and feel out the atmosphere between the two of you. His heart felt like it was stuttering in his chest as his finger hovered over his screen; you left him a voicemail. He needed to know what the message said, but a part of him was also worried he might not like what he heard, he had hurt you too many times to count, and if whatever you had to say to him broke him down more than he already was, well then he was sure he deserved it.

Carmen took one last deep breath before clicking on the voicemail and raising the phone to his ear, heart pounding in his chest as he heard the sweet whisper of your voice.

‘Hey Carmen, uh it’s me…Baby. Not sure why I introduced myself. I'm sure you know it’s me.” Carmy let out a watery chuckle at the sound of your voice, even if he hadn't saved your number the delicate timber of your voice would’ve been enough for him.

“Listen uh, I got your number for Pete. I hope you don’t mind, I know you have issues with girls actually having your number…Sorry, that was actually kind of rude. Anyway, I uh…Pete helped put things in perspective for me and I, I think we need to talk Carmen. I’m not sure when or if you even want that, but I think we both deserve a chance to explain our side of things. I um…I also have some things I think you should know. Just, if this is something you’re interested in, you have my number.” Carmen felt his heart rate slow down your words, nothing more than a piece offering.

“I just want to be clear though, um..if I don’t hear back from you, I’m going to take that as a sign. So yeah, call me back or something I guess.” The line finally went silent, your voice no longer caressing Carmy’s ears.

It felt like he was having heart palpitations but he knew it was just his nerves getting the best of him. He pulled the phone away from his ear, the time on his phone reading 5:30 p.m. Carmy quickly opened the group chat scrolling through to find your address and open it up in maps. You lived about 30 minutes from where he was, he was confident he could get there in 20 and spare the 10 minutes at a store near you.

Carmen made his decision as he set his phone down in the cup holder before beginning his journey. The ball was in his court, you had given him an olive branch and it was up to him whether he accepted it or not. He was nervous, maybe showing up at your house to cook you dinner wasn’t his most thought-out plan but he needed you desperately, needed to see you, be in your presence, and know that there was still a chance of something more between the two of you.

The hope Carmy felt when he saw you calling him earlier was now back tenfold: the pendant delicately resting against his chest felt warm. Carmen was adamant that he would admit his love for you tonight, unsure if he could go another day living with the fact that you were in love with him, but you still didn’t know just how much he had always loved you. You were so blissfully unaware that since he could remember, you had been the one and only option in his mind.

a/n: wowza, long time no see. i apologize that this is a bit of a filler chapter but it felt kinda necessary idk. anway please let me know if there are any problems with this chapter it's barely edited. enjoy : )

also also: both richard cabral as coco in mayans and manny montana as rio in good girls inspired cortez the sponsor, but head canon him as whoever you want…okay bye now 🤍

[voidbeomgyu]

7:06AM: ive been so inactive bc classes just started again, but ive come back to release my anxiety ab this man at the bus stop. im literally in the bus rn but at the stop i was waiting and then some man ive never talked to before pulls up and starts talking to me. ((for context my class starts at 7:15am and i take the 6am bus bc the next bus is at 7am and id be late by a few right but sometimes idc ab being late cos im tired so i take the 7am bus, like today))

so ive seen this fool like mayb two times before ,i cant remember but he never talked to me until today when he walked to the stop and asked me "arent you cold?" cos all i have on rn are my sweatpants and a tshirt over a white longsleeve cos my first class is a body conditioning class im gonna warm tf up right. but i was like "uh aha a little" and he laughed or whatever and then just kept talking like bro im literally trying to text my "more than friends" friend rn leave me alone. he asked if im going to school rn and BRUH MEN MAKE ME BLANK OUT LIKE MY MOUTH GOES ON AUTO PILOT SO MY DUMBASS SAID YES.

ive had some not good at all experiences with men and boys around my age before so idk, ig over time my axiety just got worse? anyway he was like "college? [state] state?" and i omg i was like "no just college ahah" and the nearest one is like the ONLY ONE SO HE CONNECTED THE DOTS TO WHICH SCHOOL I GO TO OBV. i even told him my name bc im DUMB. but like im wearing my bracelets rn right (i make and wear kandi ((pony bead bracelets))) and the one on my wrist has my name on it and so does the phone charm thing i made. so i like noticed him eyeing it and was like FUCK I CANT EVEN LIE ARRGRGRHHR COS LIKE I COULD SAY IT WAS A FRIEND OR FAMILY MEMBER NAME RIGHT BUT WHY WOULD I HAVE MY PHONE CHARM SAY SOMEONE ELSE'S NAME RIGHT GRRRARRGGRGSGR

after he would finish a thought id turn to look forward to the road again and look down at my phone to text my friend right so it would be silent for like 2 second and then BOOM HE STARTS TALKING AB HOW HE GOT HIS LISENCE SUSPENDED FOR THREE YEARS BC HE KEPT BREAKING THE LAW AND GETTING TICKETS IM LOSING MY MIND WHY WOULD I NEED TO KNOW THIS??!??? he was like yea thats why im taking the bus now and have to wake up so early and im sitting there like 😀👍

i had my mask on bc paranoia yardy kno (tmi i have the covid vaccine and two boosters and i still got sick but i didnt die so cool it did what it was supposed to ((tmi tmi my body is so weak when i was in 5th grade i almost died from an infection spreading up my arm to my heart from a PLAYGROUND WOODCHIP SPLINTER IN MY FINGER...))) so like i wear masks bc i dont wanna get sick by ANYTHING EVEN JUST A COLD OR SOMETHING IDC IDC im happy for that tho cos 1. man does not know what my face looks like and 2. face warm

OKAY ANYWAYS when he found out my name he paused for a second and asked who my dad was and i was like ...what so he said something like his ex's brother had a daughter named [MY NAME BRUH] and i was like 😀👍 aaahawggagwggs so he thought i was her or something. i was like oh okay haha and then turned back around like ive been doing to try and end the conversation right, but like we are waiting at the bus stop yk so theres gonna be cars that pass by and its gonna get loud especially rn everyone is going to work. but since it was loud ig i didnt hear him?? cos suddenly his voice is like way louder than before right so i turn and hes like A FOOT AWAY FROM MY FACE IM AARGRHEGR WHY. he said his name i forgot what it was i wasnt paying attention cos i was like 😦 but it think it was michael, so michael if u ever see this ur weird.

anyway then he said something like "you know what's cool?" and bruh i literally saw my life flash before my eyes. why? idk but that sounds so ????? like scary ???? but i was like "uh sure" and then he went on this tangent about being in the navy and that he got to travel the world like three? idk how many times but he was telling me wheres hes been like naming the countries right

i was just sitting there being my polite little self bc i was raised to no matter what respect when someone is speaking to you in a conversation even if u dont wanna be there. like for when someone older than you is speaking to you i mean and this guy was OOOOOLDER THAN ME faded brown hair covered in grey, brown grey fluffy stash, he looked like maybe early-mid fifties but could pass for being like 70 im being so fr. anyway yea im being polite even tho im like so uncomfortable bc thats just what i do idk😭 it was def obv how uncomfortable i was tho i was fidgeting SO much like shaking both my legs, picking at the skin around my fingers, and trying to end the conversation multiple times. but he just kept going😭

but after that whole idk how long tangent ab navy stuff he suddenly asked (after i turned around to stop talking to him ofc) how old i was like "how old are you if you dont mind me asking?" and so i was like scared but also kinda relieved cos i get comments a lot about how much younger AND how much older i look bc ig i just present myself more mature??? even tho my style and stuff isnt like super mature or anything ppl ive talked to like teachers/parents/classmates who are older than me, like mid twenties to late thirties tell me that they thought i was so much older when im actually like a baby. its only ppl my age that say i look younger right, so i was like oh maybe he thinks im like way older or something?? like im wearing a backpack and a little tote with stuff so it looks like im going to school, but he asked if im attending college or a four year uni meaning he thought i was a little older (or at least he just didnt mention a thought of me being in high school? mayb cos im taking the public bus and not a school bus idk). i said the truth bc I HAD HOPE IDK BRUH LIKE IKKKK I RLLY SHOULD NOT HAVE HAD ANY HOPES BC A MAN IS A MAN AND IF U GET WEIRD VIBES THEN THEY ARE PROB VERY MUCH CORRECT BUT IDK😭😭😭

anyway i told him like yea im 18 and when i tell you his face lit up like LIT UP. i was gonna be sick like why are you smiling so hard at me being so young like he was giddy ab it too like STOPPPP. he was like "woww getting your education earlyyy thats awesome" and tbh idk how to take comments like that bc idk hs at least in my state is like "go to college or university immediately after highschool" and during senior year we have stands up to help us apply for schools and stuff so i dont rly see me being 18 at college early or anything so i just sat there like "😀👍 thanks" IM USING THAT EMOJI COMBO A LOT BUT DAWG ISTG THAT WAS LITERALLY ME THE WHOLE DAMN TIME IM SO FR

i was thinking to myself like WHY IS THIS BUS TAKING SO DAMN LONG PLEASEEEE😭😭😭😭😭 but it arrived eventually and he got on first and sat allllll the way at the back. i always sit near the front bc its just easier ig idk but i was like so relieved bruh while i was sitting there listening to him i was thinking like oh my god P L E A S E do not sit next to me to keep our conversation going i want to sit in silence and be CALM. IM LITERALLY A BROKE COLLEGE DANCE MAJOR STUDENT IM SO PHYSICALLY AND MENTALLY TIRED AND I CANT EVEN DRIVE SO IM TAKING THE PUBLIC BUS AT 6AM EVERY MORNING SO I WAKE UP AT 4:30AM TO GO TO MY 7:15AM BODY CONDITIONING CLASS.

maybe i am overreacting and it was one of those things thats like a fatherly kind of thing. like how sometimes you might meet a nice man who works at a shop and you see him as like a father figure of sorts yk. but like i really REALLY was not getting that vibe. like at some points i was 'like yea cool okay mayb im wrong and ur just a wise man talking life to a kid you met at the bus stop', but then he'd just keep talking. and yk how theres like a line of where something is like too much to say right. like its a common sense thing to know when you're a GROWN person and you first meet someone who is damn younger than you and could pass as a minor, you dont ask like where they live what highschool they went to, (i forgot to mention but yea he asked me that) or dump a bunch of your life on them. like he told me what highschool he went to, what elementary school he went to, what state it was in, and how he was born and raised there, where he used to work, how he had a motercycle and went 160mph coming off the freeway like an idiot, what car i should get when i decide to start drive instead of taking the bus, how cute it is that my name is so similar to a brand (like a one letter difference so he noticed it right away and was like "ohh thats so cool, you're so unique thats cute"), and that whole ex's brother thing was weird too like idk i feel like you wouldnt ask "who's your dad?" but rather ask like "does [name] happen to be your father?" or something yk. NOT TO MENTION THE LISENCE SUSPENDED FOR THREE YEARS NOW ONE YEAR LEFT THING TOO LIKE ��� OKAY WHY WOULD YOU TELL ANYONE YOU JUST MET AB THAT😭😭😭

anyway yea i just didnt get the friendly older man you see in those heart touching movies kinda vibe. more like grown man finds a young girl sitting alone at the bus stop and dumps his life story on her to hopefully rush into some sort of relationship with her kinda vibe. (like those situations ((a lot of the time in fiction lol)) where you meet someone for the first time at a bar or something and you talk the whole damn night and either go home knowing everything ab eachother and planning on meeting again or having fucked in the backseat of one of your cars kinda rush i mean) IDK MAN it was like a scary unsettling kinda vibe yk. it was obv he had so much more he wanted to say bc he was like ig stopping himself?? idk how to elaborate on that but when the bus finally arrived he sighed like "aw the bus is here" so i feel like he wanted to talk with me more.

TL;DR im never taking the 7AM bus instead of the 6AM bus again because of a man i met on a cold wednesday morning 😀👍 happy day everyone

[doebt]

Bro gravy ran across the street and i almost dieddd ttying to get her omg my heart is like racing...shes a charlies bedroom cat for the next foreseeable future

[voidsteffy]

Okay okay I know you probably watched the movie AGES ago but omg. Sita ramam. I cannot

I watched it yesterday and I cannot stop thinking about it ?? Afreen ?? Ram ?? Noorjahan ???

Everything was so pretty everyone was so pretty and it was so sad and I was bawling my eyes out. Also ugh vishnu like ok bro you had a family I get it but :(((( ram :((((

And his letter to sita. Chills. Literal chills.

Anyway idk who else wouldve watched the movie so I'm here don't mind me just crying on a monday morning T-T

You came to the right place, or probably the wrong place cz i can't shut up about this shit

Fun trivia, I saw the first look when it came out, and the music was quite different from the one in the interval and they were still figuring out the poster, the butterflies and stuff

It was a shot of ram on the stones in the flowing pond of the mountains and cut to, he was looking into the train (it didn't strike as the train scene at first, the frame where he peeps from outside to see sita reading his letters on her berth and he smiles, yeah that scene)

And then flash the title

I was (and still am, unabashedly) on a dq high so obviously i checked it out and fell in love

And then, it was afreen's character intro/promo kind of thing where afreen is praying and then she's throwing daaru through windows (car windows as we saw later)

The moment I see Hanu Raghavapudi and Vishal Chandrasekhar (from Krishna Gaadi Veera Prema Gaadha, ok watch it i love that movie it hits so right!) and DQ (from Mahanati and Bangalore Days and OKK like bhoooof) AND MRUNAL THAKUR (from Love, Soniya) and Rashmika IN ASSOCIATION WITH DUTT PRODUCTIONS like....

feed me.

And I liked the vibe the movie went for in the ending, it's bittersweet, sort of like that one Twilight Zone episode where one grows old for the other and all. I like that they left it at a tragedy cz that's how such stories usually end but that doesn't mean they didn't happen.

Ram is my sweet sweet bway who took the correct doses of respect women juice and sita desperately needs a therapist (much like myself) and a stress ball to stop all the clumsiness (much like myself lmao)

The mahanati references, the KGVPG references, and all the director cameos... Yeah they made my day. Vishnu is unapologetically the useless scared kinda prisoner and I respect Sumanth for taking that kind of role tbh, and i wished we'd seen more of Bhumika but eh she deserves her own movies too so imma imagine

Also, RAM AND SITA WITH KIDSSSS! Like, we know the outcome of their story and that's why it's so sad to see them be so cute with kids and get soul married and want kids but never getting the time to live the life they wanted waahhhhhh stap

The music..... Um.... Well i can tell you that each song comes off as a copy of old illayaraja/op naiyyar songs but that's ok cz this year needed such music. The lyrics have me in a chokehold and ram's eyes too

And my favorite scene of all, THE SCENE

Ugh kill me why don't you!

They're on different sides of emotions about this and he's been so supportive and loving towards her but she can't lie to him anymore but she wants to live this lie bcz it's so beautiful and before she breaks it she just wants someone to be there for one last time AAAAAAAAH

In conclusion, Ram is my smolbean, Sita is me and someone can be Afreen so that i can play ninnati theepi and cry for a legitimate reason finally

(also, Rohini in vintage spectacles literally reminds me of my grandma)

[h33arts]

Me: omg i should be a murderer, is there a problem with my decision to you? Bsf: i think arson is better Me: Jesus christ bro no, i wanna personally kill each victim watching them bleed out having their life flash before their eyes as they think of everyone thatt they loved before they take their last breath in this world. Me: As they gasp for breath begging me to not kill them , thinking of every reason to live for, the one perosn that they wud live for. Bsf: Damn girl

[05aaphrodite]

I can't let you escape, not even to your own world

Pairings:Yandere! Venti x reader

Warnings:4th wall breaking,Slight crack fic,Reader death

(Plz don't let my friends see this lmao)

______________ ׂׂૢ་༘࿐_______________

I chug all of my soda then slam it on the table "Aight, let's go farm for Venti's talent mats" I grabbed my controller then push the left joystick forward, after all of these grinding... I finally manage to get him on his rerun, I was skeptical that he would come home but surprisingly, I did a single pull then I got him, I'm grateful that I got my dream team, Xiao,Diluc,Venti,Bennett I will be saving for a Klee rerun.

My phone beeped a notification, I peek at it and it's my friend gc, I put down my controller then grab my phone

(A/n: Btw, the gc is based of my friend gc lol)

❀Genshin Gang❀

Diluc's hairtie

Y'ALL GUESS WHAT??

Albedo simp

OMGGGGGG CONGRATS BHIEEE

E_supremacy

CONGRATSSSSS

Xiao come home plz

I TOLD YA, YOU WILL GET HIM

Ventea

Hope all😭😭

VENTI CAME HOME

BROOOO CONGRATS OMG

ZHONGLI COME HOME

JK JK CONGRATS TOO

Diluc's hairtie

I was losing hope until I wished one more time😭

ZHONGLI COME HOME

CONGRATSSSS AGAIN, AND TO Y/N, BOTH OF YOU GOT VENTI

VENTI CAME HOME

THANKS PALL

E_supremacy 

Now my Zhongli is happy :D

Diluc's hairtie

YESSES

A smile plastered on my face, I'm so happy for them! My attention was stolen when Venti decides to say his idle line "Come on Traveler, let's go! The world is full of lost ballads just waiting to be rediscovered." I put my phone down then grab my controller again "Ok ok, I will pay attention to you now" I chuckled humorously "Good! Just don't make me murder your friends."

The moment he said that line, my thumb suddenly stopped pushing the joystick, did he just..... did I just heard that right? Murder... your friends? What does he mean by that? Someone never mentioned this voiceline of his, I should check the character icon. I clicked on the character icon then proceed to his voicelines, I checked every details but I can't seem to find it, maybe it's a bug? The fact that I was talking to my friends.... maybe Mihoyo intended it?

I shrugged my shoulders then continue to the domain to farm for talent materials. After countless of grinding, I started to have fun with his wind current while harassing random hilichurls for fun, I made him sat at the Barbatos statue "You finally came home..." I smiled as I touch the screen, Venti looked at the camera then smiled "That's so cute! He smiles when he looks at at camera!" I awed, I continue to fawn over him.

⌣ ‿ ‿ ‿ ‿ ‿ ‿ ⌣⌣ ‿ ‿ ‿ ‿ ‿ ‿ ⌣

I woke up by the sound of my ps4 opening, the bright light illuminated my body, and to my surprise, my ps4 opened by itself "What the fuck?" I stood up from the bed then went to investigate it. The creepiest thing is that Venti is the only one in my party, and he is sitting at barbatos' hands, and then I remembered the hacked accounts in genshin, this could be a sign..

I hurriedly grab my controller then check my characters, all of them were Venti! I can't find a single character other than him! What's going on!? I check my weapons but they are okay, I checked my profile and nothing changed but my icon was set to Venti, i checked my primogems and fate but nothing changed, in fear of getting hacked, I contacted Mihoyo for customer support, I can't lose Xiao, I whaled for him! I restarted my ps4 then go back to sleep, in hopes that it will be resolved next morning.

I rubbed my eyes then stretch my arms wide, I look at my ps4 then my phone, I grab my phone then text on the gc

❀Genshin Gang❀

VENTI CAME HOME

Guyssss, something weird happened yesterday 

ZHONGLI COME HOME

Why?

VENTI CAME HOME

My ps4 opened by itself and Venti was the only one in my party, I tried to change my party set back to normal but all of them were Venti

Albedo simp

Welp, sounds like a bug

But hey, freemogems :D

VENTI CAME HOME

My weapons and primogems were untouched but the weird thing is that my character icon is set to Venti, but I didn't change it

This is like a Ddlc reference lmaooo

Xiao come home plz

Aight, time to report to Mihoyo for free 600 primogems 

E_supremacy

Be careful, maybe you're getting hacked? You should change your password incase

VENTI CAME HOME

Yep bro, I will change it

I put my phone down then open my ps4, I prayed to myself that everything is back to normal. Happiness washed over me when I saw that my original party is deployed "must've been a crazy bug.." I chuckled, I change my icon back to Xiao then continue with the grinding "Ooohhh timmie's birds" I smirked, I switched to Xiao then climb the nearest cliff, I glide then plunge on the birds "Free fowls!!" I exclaimed then claim the fowls, my character suddenly switched  back to Venti, I didn't even press anything other than claim fowls "You know I'm getting impatient.." Venti said, again this was not even in his voice lines, then I notice that something is odd with my venti, he kept saying weird lines everytime my attention is drifted to somewhere else, could it be Mihoyo's doings? I hope so, I don't want a ddlc fiasco again.

After farming for his ascension materials, I quit genshin then read some fanfictions in Tumblr, I came across a Kaeya fanfic then proceed to read the contents. All of a sudden, my ps4's screen started to distort, my eyes widened at the sight of it, then a bright light surrounded me, making my head dizzy

.

.

.

. 

"Traveler, you're awake" I woke up to a familiar voice reaching my ears, I blinked my eyes slowly to realize that I'm not in my room, where am I? My jaw dropped when the person I saw in my eyes is none other Venti, this is impossible! He's not real! "Venti...?" I tilt my head in confusion, there's no way this is real.... this must be a dream! The bard showed a genuine smile before putting down his lyre "I'm happy that you pulled for me, I will go crazy if you pulled for him instead, hehe." Venti had a patronizing smile after that, my eyes widened as I sat up "Venti? There's no way that you're real!" I said, feeling my empty pockets, Venti sighed as he stood up, he had his lyre in his hand "Come on Traveler, let's go celebrate the windblume festival." the God reached out his hand, I was reluctant to respond to his offer, he seems a bit suspicious to me, considering my ps4 sucked me in Teyvat. Not to mention, he said these weird lines when I was communicating with my friends, and my controller would move on its own when I'm playing another character "What are you waiting for?" A smile was om his lips, I took his hand then stood up "Ok, let's go." Venti giggled as he led me in Mondstadt, I gaze behind to see the Vennessa tree.

No way.... all of this seemed real... the designs.... the npcs.... all of them are accurate! The only difference is that I don't see control menu "Isn't it beautiful? Traveler?" Venti turned to me, I nodded with hesitant. As my eyes scanned the whole city, Fischl and Bennett were talking to each other, Kaeya,Rosaria, and Diluc at the same table, although Diluc seems poker faced, Barbara was performing for the crowd, Jean and Lisa are eating together, Albedo,Sucrose, and Timaeus are experimenting,Amber is seen gliding, everything seemed lively more than the actual game.... "Come on Traveler!" The bard took my hand without giving me time to consent.

The rustling sounds of the leaves snap me back to reality, it still feels like a dream, did Mihoyo said something about this? The atmosphere is so lively and different "Uh oh woahhh!! Watch out!" Amber then crashed into Noelle, I giggled slightly then turn to the bard who was playing the lyre for a small crowd, as the sweet melodious tone halt to stop, the crowd clapped their hands, I smiled a little bit as I made my way towards him "Did you like it?" Venti inquired, I nodded then smiled, the bard chuckled as he took my hand then led me somewhere.

I realized we were getting far away from the festival, perturbation washed over me "Venti.... where are we going?" sweat dropped on my temples, Venti looked at me with a menacing smile "Somewhere..." 

He led me to starsnatch cliff, the breeze of the wind soothes my nostrils, I can't believe all of these are real.... Venti picked a Cecilia flower then hand it to me, I narrowed my eyes "Are you really.... real?" I gaze at his eyes 

"I'm aware that all of us are just video game characters, that's why I'm a God"

My eyes widened as he said that, he tucked the cecilia behind my ear "Y/n, will you stay here forever..?" The bard took both of my hands, his puppy eyes gleaming, I do want to visit Genshin.... but that does not mean I will abandon my world 

"Venti.... I have my friends and family there..." I said, I averted my gaze to the floor, his grip on me got tighter "Y/n, your world does not need you" his tone was a mix of devastate and anger "All you need is me, you belong here" 

My eyebrows furrowed, what does he mean by that!? "No! I can't just leave everyone! My friends care about me!"  I screamed in frustration. He then uses his anemo powers on me that sent me flying through the air "Arghh! Let me go!!" I desperately try to break free

"Don't you see that I love you? I don't like it when you control me everyday" Venti was feigning sadness on his tone 

"Because you're never real!" I retorted back, a grin was marked on his face "I ever regret pulling for you!" I yelled. The bard went closer then cup my cheeks "So? You already got me, you did this to yourself" then his hands swayed, causing me to fall of the cliff, my life flashed before me, this is it....

"May your soul rest in this game"

[tanzaniiite]

OVER IT • TSUKISHIMA K.

requests: CLOSED

warnings: angst galore

word count: 2.9k

this idea has been in my head for the past couple of days and i’ve finally got to write it out, i’ll be back to request killing after this. enjoy!

It was a simple statement.

You didn't mean anything by it, so you weren't sure why your boyfriend was making a big deal out of nothing. At least, you assumed it was nothing. It's obvious that Tsukishima has trust issues, that you were well aware of. But you've known him since middle school. One would believe that you've passed that hurdle in your relationship, right? Wrong.

Being around Kei felt like a being around a time bomb. Most people didn't know what would trigger him and his resting bitch face didn't make it any easier either. Of course, having dated him for almost a year now and knowing him for more, you knew what to and what not to bring up. But like most people, you slip up. Who knew ten words would cause so much turmoil?

It started off normal, well as normal as a study date could be. The practice had ended early for some reason, you decided to not pry about it. You, Tsukishima, and Yamaguchi walked home together. The walk was relatively quiet, with you and Tadashi having a small conversation of your own. Once Yamaguchi went on his own merry way, Kei carefully held your hand with his. You glanced at him and smiled slightly. "Oh, what's this? Tsukishima Kei, showing affection?" You teased, swinging your hands back and forth slightly. Tsukishima's cheeks were dusted a light pink, if you asked, he would swear it was the heat (even though the temperature dropped almost an hour ago). But you both knew that you were the only one who had the power to make him flustered, even if it wasn't by much.

"Shut up. I'm your boyfriend, I can't hold your hand?" He questioned, staring straight ahead. You giggled and poked his cheek, "Nope, not you. It's weird" You taunted. It was all fun and games until he snatched his hand away from yours, which caused a whine to leave your lips. "Hey!" You pouted, trying to grab his hand again. "No, it's weird right?" He retorted, holding his hand out of your reach, knowing it was impossible for you to obtain. He chuckled as you jumped trying to get him to hold your hand again. After five minutes, he decided to take pity on you and hold your hand once again. You glared at him, "You're so mean" You stated.

"Of course, I've got to give my girlfriend the full Tsukishima Kei experience"

The walk to his house was full of playful banter exchanged between the two of you. But the minute Kei spotted his brother's car in the driveway, his demeanor changed. You didn't notice the change right away, "Oh, I didn't your brother was visiting from college" You said, still holding Tsukishima's hand. The blonde pulled his hand away from yours and stuck them in his pockets, "Neither did I" He replied, walking ahead of you.

You followed behind him, now noting the solemn mood that took over. You knew Kei didn't talk to his brother much, after the whole "incident" between them. His mom often complained to you about the gap was growing in her two boys' relationship. You couldn't help but feel bad, you knew it was a pride thing when Akiteru lied to his brother. Obviously that doesn't excuse it but still, you understood.

"I'm home, Y/n's with me"

Tsukishima called out while taking his shoes off with you following suit. Akiteru popped his head in the foyer, "Hey lil bro, long time no see" He chirped. Kei just nodded, not bothering to respond. You didn't miss the slight hurt that flashed on his older brother's face before he turned to you. "Omg Y/n, you've gotten so big since I last saw you! How are you?" He asked, pulling you in for a hug. You hugged back, smiling, "I'm good, how's college life? Is it as good as the movies?" You inquired.

Akiteru has always been like an older brother to you, way before you and Tsukishima started dating. He was the reason you two got acquainted in the first place. Akiteru worked for your parents for a couple of summers. And when your parents threw their annual 'End of the Summer' cookout, Akiteru finally accepted their invitation and brought Kei along with him. The rest was history.

"Ha! I wish, it's hard to party when you're swamped with work but that might just be my poor management skills talking" He laughed, scratching his cheek lightly. "Enough about me, what brings you here?" Akiteru asked, crossing his arms over his chest.

"Oh, Kei is gonna help me study for a bit" You answered, suddenly noticing that your boyfriend was no longer in the foyer. "Ah that's good, well I'll let you get to it. Wouldn't want to keep Kei waiting, I think we both know he doesn't have a lot of patience" Akiteru said, whispering the last part causing you to giggle. You waved to the eldest Tsukishima brother as you made you way upstairs to Kei's room.

You opened the room door before closing it gently behind you. Your blonde boyfriend was already at his desk, reading a textbook, his headphones snuggly placed on his head. You walked over to him, lifting one side of his headphones, "Thanks leaving me alone with your brother" You whispered in his ear before pulling away and sitting on his bed.

Tsukishima took off his headphones and turned to look at you, "Sorry, it didn't look like you minded" He replied back. You took note of the snarky tone he used, he's annoyed with you for speaking to his brother. You mentally rolled your eyes, how petty. "My bad, maybe it's because I haven't seen the dude in almost a year" You muttered while rummaging in your bookbag. Tsukishima just stared at you before turning back to his textbook.

You two did work in silence for a good ten minutes before you spoke up. "Are you still mad at Akiteru?" You asked randomly. You knew this was a sensitive topic for your boyfriend but the tension you felt in the foyer earlier wasn't imaginary. "Who said I was mad at him?" Tsukishima inquired, not bothering to look at you. "Uhh, says the tension that was in the air the minute you saw his car" You retorted, looking up from your own textbook.

There was a short pause before he responded, "Well no. I'm not mad at him. Annoyed? Yes. Mad? No" He replied curtly. You knew you could push a few more questions before Kei got to his breaking point. "Well, why? What did he do this time?" You asked, resting your chin on your hand. "Nothing" Kei stated with a note of finality in his voice. Signaling to you that he didn't want to speak about his brother anymore.

But you didn't care. You knew what this was really about, and against your better judgment, you decided to push your agenda. "Clearly, it's something. You don't give dry ass responses to your brother for no reason Kei" You spoke, the textbook in your lap long forgotten. Tsukishima scoffed, "Please. I give dry responses to everyone". You raised an eyebrow, "You don't give dry responses to me" You insisted.

"You're different. Plus I did give you dry responses when I first met you" He claimed, still staring intently at his textbook. You sighed heavily. "Kei, you can't keep holding on to what your brother did. Yeah, it was wrong but he apologized and it happened years ago–" You started before you saw Tsukishima's hand curl into a fist. "Don't speak on things you know nothing about" He said, through gritted teeth.

You narrowed your eyes, was he fucking serious? "What the hell are you talking about? I was there Kei! So was Tadashi and that other kid, I know what I'm talking about" You argued. Finally, for the first time in this whole conversation, Tsukishima turned to face you. If looks could kill, you would be dead on the spot. His honey-colored eyes glared at you and his eyebrows were furrowed causing creases between them.

"Clearly, you don't. If you did, you would know it's not that easy for me to let something like that go. He lied, Y/n" Kei snapped, his glare not once faltering. "Everybody lies Kei. You're smart enough to know that also applies to your brother" You explained, staring at the blonde in disbelief. Why was he so adamant about holding on to this? What was the problem? "That's not the point." He huffed, turning around again.

"Then what is the point Kei?"

Tsukishima just shook his head, returning to his work. You blinked, was he ignoring you now? Wow, so childish. You huffed through your nose and picked up your discarded textbook, "I seriously can't believe you haven't gotten over this yet" You uttered, flipping the pages to the right chapter.

And there it was.

The time bomb finally stopped ticking.

Next thing you knew, Tsukishima slammed his textbook shut and swiveled around in his chair at the speed of light. His face was red and he was shaking, in what you assumed was anger. This, however, wasn't an unfamiliar sight. You and Kei have argued before and you guys would argue again. You were both fireballs, and you know what they say about fighting fire with fire...

"Get out."

"I'm sorry, are you having a tantrum?"

"I said: GET OUT!"

You flinched slightly at his raised voice. You watched how his anger subsided for a hot second before he sat down and returned to his textbook. All you could do was scoff and pack your stuff. He always did this, you always tried to help him. Always tried to get him to open up and what did you get in return? Anger, that's what you got. Every fucking time. You zipped up your bag and flung it over your shoulder before storming out of his room, slamming the door behind you.

You put your shoes on as fast as you could, but it was a little hard to do so with the tears clouding your vision. "Hey" Akiteru spoke softly, sitting next to you on the stoop. You sniffed, "Hey. Kei and I finished studying. So I'm leaving if I could get this stupid shoe on–" You claimed, as you struggled to get your left shoe on. Akiteru took your shoe from you, "I heard you and Kei arguing... you don't need to defend me y'know" He stated as he helped you slip on your shoe with ease.

"I know but he's being such a dick about it. You already apologized, what more does he want?" You asked rhetorically, wiping the tears in your eyes. Akiteru only shrugged, "I don't know what he wants. But I do know he has every right to be upset with me. I lied to him for three years, I would be mad at me too" He spoke, whispering the last part.

"You had a good reason tho–"

"But that doesn't make it okay"

"I know but–"

"Y/n. Kei will forgive me on his own time. I can't force him and neither can you. All I can do is wait and all you can do is support him. I get the feeling he isn't pleased with his girlfriend siding with his brother" Akiteru joked lightly. He gently patted your knee before standing up and stretching.

"Now c'mon, let me drive you home"

The next week was a nightmare. Tsukishima didn't speak to you and vise versa. If he wanted to be an asshole, then so be it. He'll never catch you trying to help him again. But... you'd be lying if you said you didn't miss him. You missed how he would walk you to class, how you two would sit in the courtyard together for lunch, how you would walk him to volleyball practice before going to the library to wait for him. The list goes on, Kei was a big part of your life whether you wanted to admit it or not.

"Y/n! Y/N!"

You turned around to see blue and orange bounding toward you at full speed. You quickly step sided before they collided into you. "Hey Hinata, Kageyama, what's up?" You asked, looking at the two boys trying to catch their breath in front of you. Suddenly they both bowed simultaneously, "Please tutor us!" They asked in unison. You chuckled nervously as students passing by gave you three weird looks. "Uh.. sorry guys but my marks are fairly average. I don't think I'll be any help to you" You claimed, rubbing the back of your neck.

"Please? Tsukishima won't tutor us anymore! He's been a real jerk lately" Hinata huffed, his cheeks puffing out slightly. "More like an asshole" Kageyama commented before quickly stuttering out, "S-Sorry! I know he's your boyfriend–". You held up your hand, "It's okay, I know. He's been the same way with me. I could tutor you guys before practice if you want?" You suggested.

"Yes! Thank you so much Y/n! You're the best!"

Hinata hugged you tightly and you patted his head. "You're welcome Hinata, I'll meet you guys at the gym later" You confirmed, before pulling away and walking to your next class.

Why did you agree to this again?

You loved Hinata and Kags, you saw them as little brothers but.. these boys are idiots. You wanted to tear your hair out. Letting out an exasperated sigh, you tried to explain the formula to them one more time. "Come on guys, it's not that hard" You claimed, leaning your head in your hand. The gym floor was hurting your butt and you couldn't wait for Daichi to show up so you could leave.

Not to mention, you wanted to get out of here before he who shall not be named shows up. "I'm sorry Y/n, I just don't get it," Tobio said, erasing his paper for what seemed like the hundredth time. You sighed, "Y'know what? It's fine. We'll pick this up again tomorrow, you guys have to get ready for practice anyways" You stated as you started packing your stuff. The boys nodded following suit.

You bid them goodbye as you left the gym. Once you turned around to head home, the last person you wanted to see was standing a few feet away from you. Tsukishima stared at you, his eyes widen by a fraction, probably surprised as to why you were in the gym. Next to him was his right-hand man, Yamaguchi. Tadashi just looked between the two of you before heading off to the club room on his own. You didn't blame him, the tension in the air was thick.

"Hey stranger"

"Hey."

You walked to Tsukishima, deciding enough was enough. As much as you hated to admit it, you missed your sarcastic bean pole of a boyfriend. When you stopped right in front of him, he nodded towards the gym, "What were you doing in there?" He asked. Ugh, you got a migraine just thinking about it. "I was trying to teach your friends some math turns out I overestimated how smart they were," You said, looking up at your boyfriend. "Yeah? Well, that was your first mistake" He replied, the smallest of smirks gracing his lips.

You smiled sadly, looking down at your feet, "I miss you" You muttered. You fully expected Tsukishima to pretend to not hear you and make you repeat yourself like he always did. And you two would makeup and all would be good again. But.. he didn't do that. Kei lifted your chin with his fingers to make you face him. He then wrapped his arms around you and pulled you close to him. You, of course, hugged him back as he mumbled something against your hair.

You stifled a giggle as you leaned back to face him. "I'm sorry, I didn't quite catch that. Can you repeat that?" You asked sweetly. "Really Y/n?" He groaned. You nodded, looking at him expectantly. Kei rolled his eyes before looking at you seriously, "I missed you too. And I'm sorry for being a dick" He apologized, kissing your forehead tenderly. A small pout formed on your lips, "Why are you sorry? I pushed you and that's on me. You'll forgive Akiteru on your own time, and I'll support whatever you do. Whether that's giving him forgiveness or the silent treatment" You declared, holding his face in your hands.

Tsukishima rolled his eyes, "Stop being so dramatic, it's annoying. But, you were right. I can't be mad at him forever. He's been trying to make things right since then and I guess I pity him" He explained, still holding you in his arms. "Hm. Well, take it slow, there's no rush. Akiteru will be happy either way. Now go to practice, you're late" You scold, pulling away and pushing your boyfriend towards the gym. Kei grabbed your hand before you walked off, "Hey Y/n?". You hummed in response looking back at him. Your heart skipped a beat as he looked at you with nothing but love and admiration in his eyes.

"I don't what I'd do without you, so thank you for being in my life"

You smiled widely, pressing a soft kiss to Kei's lips, "Aw, look who's being dramatic now".

In the end, you never found the answers to your questions. And that's okay. Because you'll support Tsukishima in all his endeavors, petty or not. Because that's what partners do for each other. Tsukishima wasn't over his brother's betrayal and even though you didn't really understand why... that was okay. Because this was about him, not you.

And so, you got over it.

tanzaniiite © 2020 — all rights reserved. do not repost, modify, or copy. do not plagiarize. thank you.