#my husband woke me up with a new projector light

[mooreaux]

It's me birthday!! 🤡🎉 29 huh? When the heck did that happen

[bruhlsbees]

sweet disposition: 1/? || femaleprofessor!reader x modern!alex kerner

hi bestie hehe i’d like to request a little series for you, sub! a little jealous modern alex keener (of age) x professor! f reader (late 20’s) - shes an english romantic lit professor & her “love interest” is a film professor who is one of alex’s shared teacher. alex has a little crush on her, and knows the film teacher is after her. super fluffy, smut maybe??? u decide baby, im just so excited eeeeek!!!

summary: alex kerner is a senior film student and develops a crush for his friend, denis, english professor

pairing: modern!alex kerner and professor!reader

warnings: age gap (alex is 22 and reader is 32), wet dream, sweet sweet pathetic boy, nsfw, 18+, minors dni

word count: 4,387

a/n: thank you for the request @gotmadison ily sweet gal!! this will be a short fic series i write and will post probably throughout the coming weekend! :) please enjoy and if you have any requests or asks please send them in!!!

For Alex Kerner, a senior film student, nothing bored him more than the first day of a new unit. He knew what to expect - twenty plus slides about some dead, or borderline dead, director while connecting their life to the style of films they did and how it related to whatever political controversy was going down at the time. Alex knew that there was a reason for going into so much history to better understand the meaning of the films, but jesus did it have to drag for so long?

The auditorium that Alex’s class was held in was larger, although the class was rather small. There were maybe, at most, thirty students in his class, including him, which felt empty as the auditorium they were in was meant to hold almost double that. Alex didn’t mind though, of all the rows, he was the only one in the back, taking the middle seat - of course, the best view to see a film. He recognized a lot of the faces in his class, as it was a senior level class, but he didn’t bother to converse with many.

It wasn’t that he was shy, not overly at least, he just didn’t care to make friends. It was an afternoon class, he was just getting out of work to rush to his class, and far too exhausted to try and fake being friendly…hence him sitting in the back, all alone. 

The ‘Authorship in Cinema’ course he was currently in was held twice a week - both two hours long. The first class of the week was held for lectures and the second class was held for the film screening. The university was just getting back from winter break, continuing into the last half of the semester. In Alex’s class they had finished their unit on Roman Polanski before the break and they came into the next covering Krzysztof Kieślowski. Alex was thrilled to say the least about not having to listen to his film professor rave on Polanski. Even after discussing Polanski’s case, his professor still seemed to idolize the man.

Alex was not fond of his film professor. He was a younger professor, maybe in his late thirties, early forties, and he seemed to praise the worst directors he could find. His name was Jaxon Thorne and was the staple image of a douche. He always wore faded jeans that were tight in the crotch, scuffed up sneakers that he always tried to pass as being cool, and a sweater with a scarf - even though they were inside. He truly didn’t get how girls liked the man. Alex wouldn’t lie though, some of his opinions were interesting, but the guy loved to hear himself talk, that much was obvious. 

They weren’t even at the tenth slide yet when Alex felt himself beginning to doze off. Work had been busy today, fixing satellites and dealing with prissy wives and their drunk husbands. He was almost late getting to class with all the traffic that was on the highway. The last thing he wanted to do was attend class. It took everything in him not to put his head down and go to sleep right there. He had done it before, and that was a mistake he would never make again. Waking up to everyone staring and snickering while the teacher was hovering over you meant for a lasting effect.

But Alex just couldn’t take it, he was so bored with Kieślowski’s early work. The documentaries of everyday lives for city dwellers, workers, and soldiers could not keep his attention even if he wasn’t tired. He sunk down into his seat, crossing his arms over his chest, before craning his head to the side on his shoulder. His blinking became slow, desperately trying to stay awake and pay attention, but his eyes grew heavy, and before he knew it, his mouth was gaped open, drool slipping out of the corner of his lips.

He didn’t know how long he had dozed off for, but when he woke up he heard the projector screen zip up and the lights click on. Jumping slightly, Alex sat back up, feeling the stickiness of his drool on his face. With a groan, he wiped his face with the sleeve of his jean jacket before beginning to pack his things up into his bag.

“On Wednesday we will dive into his documentary, Workers, and discuss the censorship aspect of it. Come prepared to watch the screening and discuss afterwards. If anyone has any questions or comments, I’ll be staying after for a few minutes.” 

Rolling his eyes, Alex pushed himself out of his chair, swinging his bag over his shoulder before rushing out the back door at the top of the auditorium. He couldn’t have gotten out of there fast enough to avoid his teacher from going off on an ‘intellectual conversation’ on their new unit. Barf.

Alex was happy though to finally be out of class and to enjoy his hour and a half break before his next class. He knew he should have been finalizing what project he wanted to submit for critique in his senior portfolio, but he needed something to wake him up. 

As he turned the hallway, going to leave the building, he stopped by the vending machine and pulled out a crinkled bill from his pocket, pushing it into the machine before pressing the buttons to get a bottle of Coke. To his luck, however, the machine stalled, the bottle retriever getting stuck in front of the row and producing an obnoxious ‘whirring’ noise. 

“Oh you’ve got to be kidding me!” Gripping the side of the vending machine, Alex shook the machine roughly, rocking the broken vending machine back and forth until setting it back, sending a punch to the front of it.

“Woah, woah! Jesus man what did that vending machine do to you?”

Turning his head, Alex’s glare softened at the sight of his friend, Denis, approaching him. Denis, with his books still in his hands, tucked them under his arm as he stood in front of the machine, watching as the machine stalled with Alex’s bottle of Coke.

“The stupid thing got stuck! Is it too much to ask for a bottle of co-”

Before he could finish his sentence, the machine began to work again, grabbing the bottle and dispensing it below. Staring blankly at the bottom, his lips pulled into a tight line, Alex could only feel the embarrassment settling in - and it didn’t help to hear Denis laugh at how ridiculous he reacted.

“Oh my god, dude, you seriously need to take it easy. Did work kill you that bad?” Denis asked, watching as Alex bent down to pull out the bottle, standing back up as he began unscrewing the cap, guzzling the pop down. 

Nodding his head, Alex screwed the cap back on before tucking the bottle in his bag, hiccuping at the carbonation before sighing, “Yeah, and it doesn’t help that I gotta go to Professor Dick’s class right after.” 

Shifting his weight from one foot to the other, Denis nodded, listening to Alex as he vented, “Yeah, Thorne’s a real piece of work. But hey! Only gotta deal with him for another semester after this. Who knows, maybe he will knock a student up and ditch down?”

The fantasy would have been nice to come true, but Alex knew that it would stay just that - a fantasy. Thorne was a questionable guy, with interesting ideas and made borderline inappropriate comments towards the female students in all his classes…but that was just it, he could charm anyone he wanted, and that’s how he stayed around.

“Yeah, maybe when dogs walk on two legs…” Alex mumbled, pressing his knuckles to his eyes and rubbing the sleep out of them, a yawn escaping his lips. 

As he dropped his hands down to his side, he felt Denis nudge him in the arm, groaning at the contact as he was too tired to have any contact, “You got class at seven right?”

Nodding, Alex blinked, a tired smile on his face as he smacked his lips, “Yeah…seven to nine, best time of day to have a senior portfolio workshop.” 

Denis laughed at the sarcastic comment, mentioning that it could’ve been worse and be at seven in the morning than at night. Alex, however, couldn’t see how anything could be worse than an evening class after a long day of work.

“Listen, I got my ‘Romanticism in Literature’ class in a few…why don’t you come with me? My teacher’s pretty cool and I’m sure she won’t mind if you sit in. I’m in the back anyways so she probably won’t even realize. She’s got pretty bad vision I’ve realized. I think she said that her glasses don’t got the right prescription or somethin. She’s always runnin late and claims she never has time to put her contacts in.” 

The detailed explanation of the professor’s vision made Alex laugh, shaking his head as Denis looked at him confused, cheeks red, “What? It’s what she’s told us! She’s always coming in late. I wouldn’t be surprised if she came in late this time around. She’s got office hours before class, so she probably gets held up with a student.”

“Sounds like you’re in love with her, is that right, Denny Boy? Someone’s gotta crush on the teacher? Ain’t that every high school kid’s fantasy? Get the hots for the teacher?” 

Scoffing, Denis rolled his eyes at Alex’s teasing and shoved him in the arm, “No man, come on now, it ain’t like that. Look if you don’t wanna come I don’t care, but I gotta go before I’m late.”

Holding his hands up in defense, Alex trailed behind Denis, going back in the direction he originally came from, “Hey, hey, I was only kidding, don’t gotta get defensive. I’ll take along, hopefully I won’t fall asleep in this class. Why you even taking this class anyways?”

Following Denis into the class, the auditorium setup similar to the one he just came out of, except smaller, Alex sat beside Denis in the back row, watching as the class filled up, only a few seats not filled. 

“I guess I gotta earn some more credits outside my degree, this was the only one that wasn’t completely filled up yet and it worked with my schedule. It ain’t too bad, she gives us a lot of free time to work.” 

Watching as Denis set his bag down beside him, opening his textbook to where they left off the other day, Alex watched Denis prep for the class, the teacher not in sight. Alex figured that the teacher must have been running late, like Denis said she always did, but he couldn’t help but wonder how long it’d be before she even showed up.

Fifteen minutes after class was supposed to begin the front door ripped open, slamming shut seconds after while heels frantically clicked towards the desk in the front of class.

“Sorry I’m late! I got caught up with another professor. I hope you all enjoyed your winter breaks and are happy to be back. I know I’m thrilled to be back!” 

The sweet voice caught Alex’s attention, his eyes pulling from his cell phone and to the front of the class where the professor had just walked in. He felt his mouth fall open slightly, catching it before Denis noticed his reaction.

He was expecting an old lady for Denis’ class, someone who was on the edge of death and smelled of cats. What he found, however, was someone the complete opposite. Younger, curvier, and the scent that filled the room when she entered was warm - like she just finished drinking a cup of coffee.

Her hair was pulled back into a messy bun, bangs hanging low over her eyes, covering the tops of her crooked frames. She couldn’t have been all that older than him, maybe mid-thirties at max. He didn’t notice what she was wearing below, but the shirt she wore clung to her so well, the outline of her fuller chest displayed with her necklace dipping into her cleavage. 

‘Good God, Alex, get a hold of yourself.’

Alex watched the professor, noticing her speaking although his lusted thoughts deafened his ears. He assumed she was asking how the break went and if anyone did anything fun because a few people raised their hands, a kind smile on her face as she listened to her students.

“That’s great to hear, Polly! You’ll have to show me the photos you took sometime. I have never been to that side of the country before,” Her head shifted towards the other side of the room, looking up at the higher rows. “Did anyone else have anything to share about their break?”

Denis’ professor sat patiently and listened to everyone who wanted to share, giving everyone the opportunity to discuss their breaks before she opened up her laptop to get started with class. Alex watched as she picked up the remote and pointed it to the projector box, the screen coming down beside her with her computer screen displayed.

Her home screen featured what he assumed to be her and some friends. He recognized a few of the people in the photo as they were also professors at the university - what made Alex turn his nose, however, was right beside her - in all his douchebag glory, Jaxon Thorne. Before he could make a cohesive thought, the photo went away and a slideshow on Mary Shelley appeared…and maybe for the better.

“Okay everyone! As mentioned in the email, we are gonna be diving into Mary Shelley’s novel Frankenstein for this part of the semester,” She began, her warm smile still ignited, chuckling lightly as some of the students up front became uneasy in their seats, excited for the novel, “I’m glad to hear we have some fans. Now, I promised that I wouldn’t give you any reading over break, but because of that we will be reading quite a bit over the next few weeks.”

The slide shifted to the reading guide and what chapters were due when. Alex watched as some students scribbled the due dates down while others pulled out their cell phones, snapping a photo before stuffing their phones away. 

“For Wednesday I would like you all to have read the preface and letters one through four. Come prepared to discuss your analyses of the text and any questions you may have. Of course, I’ll have my office hours open tomorrow and Wednesday before class, but if there are any questions, you can send me an email and I’ll try to get back with you in a timely manner.” 

The rest of class seemed to lull by, Alex’s gaze fixed on the professor that continued to go over what the last half of the semester would look like, answering the occasional question, before finally it was time to pack up and go. Frowning, Alex shifted in his seat, looking at Denis who was packing things up in his bag. 

“It’s over?” Alex asked, eyebrows furrowed, a pathetic frown on his face.

Looking up from his bag, Denis smiled, nodding, “Yeah man, it is. Why? You fall in love with Mary Shelley?” Standing up, Denis pushed his seat under the table and shrugged his shoulders, “I mean, if it works for your schedule and you’re interested, maybe go up and ask if you can enroll. I don’t know if you’ll be able to with it being so late in the semester, but it’s worth a shot,” Glancing down at his watch, Denis sighed, “Look, I gotta run, but let me know how it goes, okay?” Patting Alex’s back, Denis rushed up the stairs and out the back door, fleeing the auditorium to get to his next class on time.

Meanwhile, Alex kept seated, watching as the professor talked with some students who approached her desk after class, laughing and admiring the editions of Frankenstein that students presented. Was this how professors could be with their students? Actually caring and involved? It seemed like Alex had poor luck with his own professors - either they were old as a bat and didn’t know how to work the computer, or they were a presumptuous dick.

When the students began to flock out, already discussing how they were looking forward to Wednesday’s class, Alex finally stood up, pulling his bag over his shoulder and making his way down the auditorium steps. She hadn’t noticed him as he walked, writing something down in her planner. As he stood now in front of her, he cleared his throat awkwardly, gaining her attention as she looked up, squinting before taking her glasses off.

“Hello,” he began shyly, adjusting the strap of his bag, “I’m Alex. My friend, Denis, he’s in your class.” 

At the mention of Denis, she smiled and nodded, “Yes! Denis, nice boy he is,” She adjusted her position in her seat, leaning back slightly, “I-I’m sorry, are you in my class? I don’t believe I’ve ever see-”

“No! I mean, no, no I’m not in your class. I have a free hour before my next class and Denis invited me to sit in for this one,” He rushed, cheeks red as he realized how abruptly he had interrupted her, “I’m sorry, um, yeah I just came down because I really enjoyed your lecture today. I was curious if there was any way I could maybe enroll? I know it’s late in the semester, but I did enjoy today.” 

The cheeky smile faded into a sadder, smaller smile. She chewed on her bottom lip before leaning forward again, crossing her arms over chest, accentuating her cleavage that Alex desperately tried not to stare at.

“Oh, I’m sorry Alex, but I don’t think I can convince the department to let you in this late in the semester. I love your enthusiasm with the course and would love to have you in my class, but I don’t think I can make that happen.” Her smile dropped to a frown when she saw the visible disappointment in Alex’s face before bending over to open her bag, pulling out a copy of Frankenstein, handing it to Alex.

Looking down at the copy, Alex opened the cover, reading what he assumed to be her name in the cover, before flipping through the pages, a weak smile on his face, trying his best to not look so pathetic in front of her.

“How about this? I probably shouldn’t, but if you want to sit in on the days you’re free, you’re more than welcome to. I’ll forward you the reading guide so you can keep up with us, but you won’t earn any credit in this class. Is that okay?” 

His frown turned into a grin, looking up from the book, Alex nodded, his cheeks pink as his toothy crooked grin spread across his face, “Yeah, yes. Thank you,” Tugging down the front of his striped blue shirt, he cleared his throat awkwardly, looking down at the book before back up at her, “Um, so when are your office hours? Just in case I have any questions?”

Letting out a faint ‘ah’, she opened her notebook and scribbled some notes down, tearing off the paper and handing it to Alex, “You’re more than welcome to shoot me an email though if you need help outside of my office hours. Or you can call my office number, sometimes I answer it.” She admitted, her own cheeks going pink at the confession.

Smiling, Alex looked down at the paper and made a mental note to remember all that she had given him.

My email,

My office number,

Office hours are M&W: 3-5:15 and T&R: 1-2

Class takes place on M&W from 5:30-6:30

:)

The smile she left on the page made Alex’s stomach flutter. His thumb ran along the smiley face before he looked up, thanking her quietly for the note. She was sweet, almost too sweet for Alex to absorb, like he was in a sugar coma and begging for more. 

“Of course, it was nice to meet you Alex. I’m looking forward to seeing you in class. I don’t mean to run off, but I’m to meet another professor here in a couple minutes and don’t need to be lectured on being late.”

When she stood up, Alex’s face went hot. The flowy flower blouse that showed more cleavage than he had seen on a professor before was tucked into a tight jean skirt, clinging to her hips in all the right places, a thick black belt holding it all together. If it weren’t for the fact that he was right in front of her, he probably would have started drooling. 

Packing up her desk, she stuffed her things in her bag, throwing her sweater over her shoulder before throwing her bag around her, moving around the desk to stand beside it now, looking up at Alex. He noted how she was shorter, the heels helping her with height, and how good her legs looked in them. Clearing his throat, he shifted his bag around him to sit in front of his pants, attempting to hide any possible pop-up in his jeans.

“If you’re free tomorrow, stop by my office hours. I’ll even buy you a coffee if it’s too early for you. I know you college boys stay up far too late. I can only imagine what your mothers think.” She teased, shaking her head and she turned and began to head out of the room, hearing Alex keep tight on her trail. 

Turning off the lights and letting him leave first, she shut the door behind her and stood beside Alex, motioning towards the English department office, “I’ll see you tomorrow, or Wednesday, my office is the last one on the right. I’ll be sure to leave my door open!” 

Nodding, Alex smiled and waved goodbye as she waved back, rushing down the hall and weaving through the students to get into the office. Letting out a sigh, Alex leaned against the doorway, processing his first encounter with the professor, the boyish lust grin stuck on his face.

⋆ ⋆ ⋆

Panting hard, Alex gripped her hips tight, his fingers digging into her plush figure, grunting as he snapped his hips into her from behind, her pillowed ass meeting him with each thrust. The sweat that built up on him was beginning to fall down face, trailing down his neck and chest. 

Tangling his right hand into her hair, his left still placed on her hips, Alex pulled her locks gently, smiling at the sound of her wanton moan, her eyes rolling back into her head. 

“A-Alex! Oh god, Alex, I don’t think I’m going to last. F-Fuck!” 

Feeling his own climax build, Alex let out a shaky breath as he bent down craning his neck to kiss her lips as he continued to rut inside of her, his thrusts becoming sloppy and quicker.

The sensation became too much too quickly, his legs shaking as he kneeled behind her befo-

Jolting awake, the obnoxious phone alarm woke Alex from his dream, resulting in a now completely frustrated mood. While still on his back, Alex reached behind him on the shelf that rested behind his bed frame, pulling his phone up and looking at the screen, squinting to gain his vision from waking up, the bright screen burning his eyes.

When he unlocked his phone and opened it, prompting him to his email, his frown lit up and turned into a smile, seeing her name in his inbox.

Good evening, Alex!

I’m sorry this is so late, I’m finally getting back to my apartment and wanted to send this your way before I forgot. Here is the reading guide for the rest of the semester and that information I shared with you earlier in case you lost it.

I look forward to seeing you in my office tomorrow or Wednesday. I hope you have a good night! :)

Best!

Alex’s mood quickly shifted after reading the email. While he was disappointed that the wet dream he was having with her ended so soon, he was more than pleased to see that he had an email from her. Clicking his phone off, Alex tossed his phone onto his bed, sitting up with his hand behind him to keep him up.

His room illuminated a red/orange hue from the lava lamp that sat on his dresser in the corner of his room. Turning his attention towards the window, he looked behind the blinds to see the city life outside his apartment lit up, the sound of music coming from the club down the road and laughs from those partying. 

Letting out a yawn, Alex shook his head and rubbed his face, shifting his legs before stopping quickly, feeling the mess in his boxers. Looking down, Alex groaned seeing the stain in his boxers, pressing his hand to feel the wet spot before sighing, standing up. He pulled his boxers carefully off, tossing them into his laundry basket before making his way into the bathroom to clean up. 

When he entered the small bathroom that was connected to his room, he hissed at the bright light as it came on, looking at himself in the mirror. His hair was tangled up, sticking out on the sides and his eyes were squinted, too tired to open them fully. Shaking his head, Alex climbed into the shower and started the water, the cold water hitting him both waking him up and cooling himself down.

He was absolutely and pathetically smitten over her. There was no doubt about it. Since leaving her class, the only thoughts that occupied his mind were of her. He had already planned out what he would wear tomorrow when he went to her office hours. It was pathetic, truly, with how quickly he was letting the woman ruin him. It was ridiculous to say, no doubt, because what would happen between them? Nothing. Not a single thing would come between the two other than a conversation about Frankenstein, maybe a personal question here and there.

Or so he thought.

[thera-daydreams]

I am painting a scenario in my mind of the hard-drive 😢. (Sorry if my writing style seems bad. :L)

——————- November 3, 2018; 3:23am ————

It was late, (Y/N) new it was late, her mind was occupied for she couldn’t find sleep, after all she couldn’t get the hard-drive out of her mind that Agatha gave her a few hours ago.

‘Sigh’ Twist and turning (Y/N) was to . . . her mind was dangerously piping interest of the hard-drive a bit too much. She knew better than to give in like that, but just looking at the hard-drive it self was already a thorn on her side. Silent but always nagging her.

‘F*ck it.’ she thought.

Walking towards the roof-top, (Y/N) made sure to keep her footsteps as silent as possible, not wanting to wake her housemates nor make them worried.

‘Now let’s see what we have.’

Putting the hard drive in the laptop, connecting it to a projector, turning the volume to the lowest possible, the movie started playing. Like the movie, memories of her past are flashing through her mind. Her late family moments made her felt warmth, sorrow, relief?? Many emotions were flashing in her eyes yet her face stay blank.

Watching the movie made her lose to time not caring if the autumn cold was getting colder and colder as minutes pass, all she could focus on was the movie, currently playing with the characters within.

“It can’t be all sorrow, can it? I’ve always been alone, so I don’t feel the lack. It’s all I’ve ever known. I’ve never experienced loss because I never had a loved one to lose . . . but what is grief, if not love persevering?”

. . .

Rubbing her eyes as the movie ended, credits were rolling, droplets of water were falling from the witches eyes, a tired sigh came out of her mouth once again.

“Hey, what are you crying for?”

Shocked by the familiar voice Wanda looked up and was astonished of who was standing in front of her.

“Come on. Dance with me.”

Waving their hand to motion, Wanda slowly stood up, her face now holding reminiscence, yearning, and nostalgia as she wakes towards them.

The scene changed, no longer was Wanda in her nightwear, instead a red velvet dress was wrapped around her beautifully, a singular rose along with baby-breaths complimented her braid halo. The clicks of her heels got louder by the second she got close to the man whom she only saw in her dreams. Firefly lights then surrounded them.

‘He was here yet he was not here.’ Is what she thought. The man in front of her was wearing a suit n tie, an elegant mahogany red that fits him all too well.

“I-”

“Sshhhh. It’s okay Wanda. I’m here.”

The man in red pulls her towards him placing her hand on we’re his “heart” were to be, along side placing his own hand over hers.

Words were no longer said as the melancholy couple slowed dance to the song, harmonizing together. They had so much to say to each other, wanting to make this moment last forever, yet it would only last for a few moments, perhaps what they wanted to say was too much and it would become meaningless if they did.

A smile came to both of their faces, basking in each other’s warmth. Even after the song ended the silence that came after was comforting to them.

“Hey Wanda.”

“Hm?”

“I’ll always be here. We’ll always be here.”

—————November 3, 2018; 6:56am————

On the couch of the roof-top, lay there a woman with tear stains under her eyes. The Vision illusion, formed by a sentient timed gem (probably gifted by Agatha), puts a blanket over the sleeping woman. A smile of warmth takes over his face.

“You can come out now.”

3 men came out behind the door, reacting like a deer in headlights, came out stumbling one by one. It was when they woke up and was unable to find (Y/N) they panicked thinking if something happened to her. Hearing the music got their attention as they quietly went to investigate the noise only to find themselves curious of the situation with the man you were with.

“Are you perhaps . . . her late husband?” Geto ask in a nervous manner, putting a hand in his pocket the other scratching the back of his neck.

“Yes”

“Oh, cool”

. . . . . . . . . . . . . .

Vision snorted catching the 3 housemates in surprise.

“Alright, I don’t have much time left here please do take care of her.”

Caught in surprise that the man can speak Japanese well, the guys still answered nothing less.

‘Of course’

‘Obviously’

‘We owe her everything.’

As the illusion of the man disappeared with a satisfied smile on his face so did the gem. A comfortable silence once again flew though.

‘Sigh’

The Fushiguro man then walked close to (Y/N), brushing away the recent tears from under her eyelids, wrapped her with the blanket securely, and hold her bridal style. Turning to his other housemate, —‘Hey let’s cook up some breakfast’. The men agreed as they started to walk down the stairs, getting read for another day as they found themselves a bunch of familiar faces with worried looks for the woman a sleep.

—————P.S: At first I was gonna use the song ‘La Vie En Rose’, but I then changed it since I wanted both Wanda and Vision to sing in harmony so that it’s more sweet instead of bittersweet. 🥲☺️🥰 🥀💐Anyway I hope you enjoyed reading this. (Took me like . . . ldk 3-4 hours??)

Awwwww, this was wonderful! 🥰

Thank you for sharing this.

Stay tuned for the next chapter! It's angst... but perhaps not the way you all imagine it. 😉

[thesolitarystripe]

Edna Briggs-Writing Prompt # I’ve Lost Cont

Today's entry was suggested by my best friend, Chenoa. This entire premise was hers and despite my encouragement that she write it; she did not feel like she could. So, I told her I would write it for her. I hope this is what she envisioned, equal parts sad and wholesome.

Enjoy my dearest!

“How long will it be tomorrow, Edna?”

“Sixty-five years.”

“Sixty-five. That’s right…”

The man knew very well how many years it would be that he and his wife would celebrate their marriage. Sixty-five years, tomorrow. Wrinkled hands found more delicate ones, pallid and cool to the touch.

“You still…can’t remember.” There was a weak puff of laughter as Edna turned her head and regarded her husband warmly.

“That’s why I need you here Edna,” at this, the man’s voice cracked with the tightness that formed in his throat. “I’ll never even remember to feed myself.” The pair chuckled softly. Edna patted the top of her husband’s hands.

“Yes, you will Jim.”

That was all she said as she smiled through brimming tears. Edna laid in the comfort of a hospital bed within her own home, in her living room, to be exact. The couple had a large family, and their bedroom was so small that Jim barely fit inside next to both the new and old beds. So, their five children deemed it necessary to move Edna into the main room so that they all could sit beside her—them and their ten grandchildren. It had been two years now that Edna was on hospice and an amazing feat considering the doctors thought she would pass on within the first six months. Edna clung to life the way she held fast to Jim’s hand, with nothing but love and enthusiasm. It was noticeable now, perhaps only to Jim, that Edna’s fingers did not grab hold so hard. In the slipping of her fingers, he felt the waning of her soul and it brought his head down upon her chest as she breathed in and out. So long as he could hear that thrum of her heart, he would know peace. Into the early morning hours, they whispered between them of all life had brought. They shared tender kisses and caresses that Jim desperately fought to commit to memory. Each tickle of her fingers at the back of his neck was etched into his bones and stored away in every fiber of his muscles. Jim would not forget. Somehow, Jim fell asleep. A grown man of ninety-five laid on his wife’s chest, back hunched forward and his arms draped over her; one behind her head and the other over her thighs. Jim fell asleep. When he opened his eyes, the first thing he saw was the look of absolute tranquility upon Edna’s beautiful features. Without moving, speaking, or thinking, Jim knew. Edna was no longer on this plane but, she had made it to midnight. They celebrated their sixty-fifth anniversary in the darkness of their living room.

The days that passed next were a blur. Perhaps one day, Jim would come to and the memories of Edna’s memorial service, her funeral, the crowds of people that came to honor her memory; maybe he would recall it. Today, he sat silently in his living room, the vacant hospital bed beside him. A few of his children were bustling in the kitchen, cooking, and making sure Jim had easy options for food because the man was proficient with a grill and that was about it.

“Papa, we cut up some fresh fruit it’s in the fridge. Make sure you eat it up, so it doesn’t go bad.” Jim’s oldest granddaughter was talking to him, but Jim was in his cushioned armchair, staring out the sliding glass door that led to their patio. All of Edna’s flowers popped vibrantly against the emerald hues of their meticulously watered grass. Jim wondered if it would all die within a few short hours once the little garden realized its tender was gone. That was good, appropriate, even. The flowers should no longer grow if Edna did not keep them; just as the sun should not rise or fall so long as Edna’s chest was still. Jim looked up at the blinding rays of the celestial body. It seemed he had not yet convinced the star to cease its normal cycle because how could life possibly go on without Edna Briggs. How, could it.

Eventually, Jim’s children and grandchildren left. He was sure it was not an easy choice for them. While he was absentminded and aloof, it did not go unnoticed the way they lingered in the doorway or how they looked at him with concern in their eyes. Jim waved them off with a brave little smile. Then they were gone, and the house was horribly quiet. There was no talk of the gossip at Bingo, no asking what time ‘Jeopardy’ would be on even though it came on every night at the same time; there was a lingering aroma of food, but it was not Edna’s cooking. Jim sat in his armchair. Jim stewed in the silence and looked out the back door until the light dissolved and nighttime fell. This was how he passed most of his days for a week. People called; he did not answer. The only communication he managed was a short text asking his children not to come—he needed time. Jim ate halfheartedly but per his granddaughter’s wishes, he did not let the fruit go bad. She had worked so hard, after all. It was on the sixth night that Jim finally turned on the television. There had been no sound for so long that it almost felt like an intrusion to hear the people in the commercials talking. He left it on and eventually, he fell asleep in his chair with one hand resting on the end of the hospital bed. That was how they had gone to bed many times over the last two years.

Jim was snoring for several hours when a sound finally woke him from his dreamless stasis. It was not the incessant dinging of bells on whatever game show had just come on—he had slept through that many times. There was a clink in the kitchen. Jim and Edna had no pets and had lived alone for a number of years after their children grew up. In Jim’s mind, there was no reason for any part of their home to be making noise unless someone else was in it. As that thought occurred to him, Jim grew very still, eyes wide open and desperately peering through the darkness. Jim had never felt scared but as he sat, totally alone, he felt that sick heat creep into his belly and spread like fire through his veins. The man was paralyzed in his chair, sinking deeper and deeper each time he heard that clinking noise. It was different and seemed to be moving around the kitchen. There was a certain tone of the porcelain in the sink when it was hit; it was very different from the sound that was produced when the marble countertops were bumped or the wooden cabinets. From what he could hear, it sounded like someone was cooking a full meal inside his kitchen. Jim’s jaw clenched. This was silly. The man, finding all the courage of his younger years rolled to his feet and turned to look back. The kitchen was in full view from the living room, there were no walls separating the adjoined spaces. So, when he looked, there was no mistaking what he saw. There was nothing to block him and his glasses were poised on the bridge of his long nose. Jim’s jaw went slack, and he was certain he was either dead or on his way to the grave.

“Edna, what in the hell are you doing?” The little old lady looked exactly the way Jim had last seen her save for the color in her cheeks. That ever-present vibrancy that Edna had when she was alive, her youthful glow, it had returned with a new fullness.

“Well excuse me, Jim, I’m making your late-night snack like I always do. I am more than happy to stop if you’re going to take that attitude with me.” Jim stared. Jim stared for a long time, so long that Edna rolled her eyes. “Tuna fish and saltine crackers, it’s your favorite.” A small plate plopped onto the counter and slid toward Jim. The man looked down for a moment but immediately brought his gaze back to Edna for fear she might vanish.

“Honey, I don’t know how to tell you this but—”

“I’m dead! I know that Jim, I’m not stupid. Someone’s got to come along and take care of you. You said it yourself a week ago, you’ll forget to eat. Then what? Then I have to spend eternity with you too?” Edna smiled after that. It was full of knowingness and patience because she was, indeed, fully aware of her circumstances.

“The—the…the grandkids…they left some food—Edna! How…” Jim was taking cautious steps forward and he found himself vaguely wondering if there was some sort of technology, he wasn’t aware of that could project life-like images of loved ones into your home. Was this some sort of invention created for coping with loss? Jim’s brown eyes did a quick scan of the kitchen. He saw no indication of a projector. There was nothing out of place in his old kitchen, except for a perfectly intact Edna standing in the middle of it.

“Simple. I didn’t want to leave,” Edna shrugged and gave the plate another inch toward Jim. The man had approached and was well within range of the plate now. He looked at Edna incredulously before he swooped in and wrapped his arms around her. She was whole and smelled like his favorite perfume; she had worn it every day since they had met. Jim wasn’t fully aware of it, but he was weeping. Into the meticulously done curls that framed Edna’s head and neck. That familiar tickle of her fingers at the nape of his neck only made him cry harder because his memory had failed him. In the short time away from his wife, Jim had already forgotten what the scrape of her nails felt like on his skin. Edna embraced her husband in the kitchen, endlessly. Only when he was ready to lift his head did she take a small step back and smile up at him. “They really should change that whole ‘till death do us part' bit. It doesn’t have to end there, not if you don’t want it to.” Jim laughed. For the first time in a week, he was smiling, and it felt like rust was crumbling off all the unused facial muscles.

“Well…what do we do?”

“What do we do? Jim I’m going to sit down and watch my shows, it’s only ten-thirty. Now eat!” Jim was given the plate of crackers. He tested its weight; he poked the bottom of it to see if his finger would go through. It didn’t. Finally, he ate a cracker with a scoop of Edna’s infamous tuna salad, and it tasted like home. Jim was not sure if he was crazy or if the Lord had bestowed a miraculous blessing upon him but, he would not question the extra time. Quickly, he shuffled after Edna who was crawling into the hospital bed already glued to the television. Jim sat in his armchair munching and constantly glancing over at Edna to make sure she didn’t get swept away into the ethers.

This was how life went on. Learning the extent of Edna’s abilities happened quickly. Jim soon learned that his children nor his grands could see her despite her standing in the foyer to greet them alongside her husband. No one else saw Edna. She did, one time, touch a dishrag without thinking and when it moved on its own their eldest son yelped and jumped away from it. Jim quickly offered up that it was simply the wind from the open window in the kitchen. Luckily, that was all it took to convince his son that there were no ghosts in the house. All the while, Jim looked at Edna who had her little hand over her mouth, giggling. Edna got to enjoy her family from a distance, something that both made her happy and hurt her. Jim could see the longing in her eyes as Edna sank to the floor to sit by their grandchildren who played, oblivious that grandma was right beside them. There was much that Jim found cruel about Edna’s current existence. While she cooked and cleaned and took care of Jim as well as she had in her living days—she could not enjoy the material things of the mortal world. Edna could watch television, listen to music, and sit beside Jim while holding his hand. She did not get to taste food or hug her kids; she did not have the luxury of soothing her grandbabies or walking outside. Edna had tried to leave the house multiple times, only to tend to her garden but every door in the home seemed to be a wall. Edna could not leave. The pair existed within the living room and kitchen. Eating and watching television. This was their new routine. Edna did not sleep; she didn’t need to. She would stay up and watch Jim, hold his hand, pet his hair; anything to keep her busy through the hours he was not conscious of her. As the months passed, Jim watched these realities affect her though Edna never complained.

One evening, the couple sat watching another ‘Jeopardy’ rerun. They chuckled a little here and there. Edna had made Jim a small platter of cut up meat, cheese, and crackers. She was always feeding him much to his family’s approval—they had predicted Jim would lose weight in the following months after Edna’s passing. They had no idea she still wandered through the home.

“Edna.”

“Yes, dear?”

“How long are you going to stay?”

“That’s a funny question. Funny, because the answer is obvious, isn’t it?” Jim looked at her with a blank expression. “I’m staying until it’s your time.”

“Do you know when that is?”

“No. That’s none of my business, even as a ghost.”

“It could be years.”

“It could be.”

“My grandfather and my father lived past one hundred.”

“Yes, yes, you have good genes. I know.” Edna said it with an air of annoyance like they had this discussion many times over when she was alive.

“My point is, you could be doing this for five more years if not more.”

“You could also die tomorrow,” she quipped.

“Are you going to live every day hoping I die tomorrow?” At this, Edna laughed and shook her head.

“No. Of course not Jim, I want you to enjoy every second of life. Watch the babies grow, watch our bigger babies grow even more. Feel the sun on your face. Tend to my flowers. Eat good food.”

“And what about you?” Jim was very serious, and the tone of his voice had changed from amiable and inquisitive to firm.

“What about me?”

“I suppose you think it’s fine for you to keep on living in this undead existence. Where you get to experience none of the pleasures you just listed off for me.”

“I get to be with my husband. That is the greatest pleasure.”

“Is it, Edna? I see how much you want to hold those grandbabies. The look on your face while I’m eating something you’ve made but you can’t even taste it. Is this really existing at all?” Edna looked at Jim. There was a long discussion had between them, without words. Jim’s eyes were glossy in the way that spoke of tears unarrived but waiting in the trenches. The line of his mouth was hard set and that horrible lump in his throat was thicker than before. It had taken him months to realize it; to see the selfishness of what he did. Jim kept Edna here. It was a blatant fact. No one else could see her, they had accepted her death and let her spirit soar free. Jim did not. Jim carried the burden of damning his wife to this listless life as a specter when she was deserving of so much more. “Edna, you have done what you needed to in this life, tenfold. You raised a beautiful family, we did, together but we both know who did most of the work. I am not blind to that. You have been an excellent grandmother to those babies, and they will grow up to know unconditional love and how to bake the best pies for Christmas. You took care of me, God, you still are! Even in death. This is not your eternal rest, Edna. This is not the peace you have earned after such a full life. It was full, wasn’t it?”

Edna sat on the edge of the hospital bed, legs dangling, hands folded in her lap as she faced Jim. Tears streamed down her face. The weight of this new existence was taxing and harder than she imagined. Participating in life from the sidelines. Watching but not doing. Living but not living at all. “It was very full, Jim. The best life I could have ever wanted and then some.” Edna’s petite shoulders shook with sobs and Jim rose and sat beside her on the bed; he encircled her in his arms and pressed his face against her neck.

“I love you Edna Briggs, but this is not the existence you were meant to have. It is time for me to let you go,” he whispered. Jim breathed in as deeply as he could. Memorizing every dip and curve of her body as if he had not already done that over the last sixty-five years. The smell of her perfume. The smoothness of her skin. The sound of her breath as she wept. These were all important pieces of information, things he would store away and remember on days when he missed her. Every day. Jim would remember it every day. Jim and Edna wept together, just as they had the night she passed. They squeezed one another and eventually fell back on the bed. Jim felt sleep tugging at his eyelids, and he knew, deep in his gut, when he woke tomorrow Edna would be gone. “I promise, I’ll see you soon. I love you so much. You have been the most amazing wife a man could ever ask for.” Jim’s hands were in those bouncy curls, fingers wrapped around Edna’s skull as he touched their foreheads together. “I won’t last long without my other half, but I’ll make sure the grandbabies are skilled pie bakers before I go.” They laughed. The room was quiet except for their sniffling. “It’s okay to go, I love you.” Edna kissed her husband’s face, his forehead, and lips. Edna fell asleep. Finally. She had not realized just how tired her soul was until her eyes closed and she drifted off into the most peaceful slumber within her husband’s arms.

When Jim woke the next morning, he was alone, as expected. Despite the hole he felt in half of his heart, Jim smiled. Edna was finally at peace and that alone brought him more joy than anything else.

[freddiesaysalright]

Peace Like A River Part 1

A Gwilym Lee x Reader Story

Summary: Reader is a stand up comic with a pretty dark past. She has a three new lights in her life: her daughter, Violet; her anonymous correspondent, Dear Friend; and Gwilym Lee. 

Word Count: 3.4K

Tag List: @psychosupernatural @someone-get-a-medic @bensrhapsody @deakyclicks If you’d like to be added, let me know!

A/N: Sorry this took so long! I had like the snippet of an idea for this and then needed more for a plot, but I think I’ve finally got it together lol. Hope y’all like it!

Part I here we go!!!

Grinning, you read over the letter once more from backstage. His words in that graceful, loopy handwriting warmed you from your heart to your toes. You sighed contentedly, stuffed the paper into your back pocket for luck, and waited for your cue.

“Ladies and gentlemen, please welcome to the stage, Y/N Y/L/N!” the host cried. 

You shook out the last of your nerves and walked out on the stage, waving and grinning at the huge crowd that stood and applauded for you. You had never done a show for an audience this large and it was both intimidating and exhilarating. 

“Thank you!” you said, as you waited for them to stop cheering. “Thank you. Thank you all for coming. Really, I appreciate it because whenever I have to go out and do things, I think about killing myself.”

A nervous titter went through the crowd and you smiled again.

“Seriously, I do. I’ll think about killing myself over nothing. Like, the other day, I was in the car on my way home from the store and my sister called me and asked me to stop by her place and help her and her husband move furniture. And I actually thought ‘If I crashed my car right now and died, I wouldn’t have to go move any fucking furniture.’”

They laughed.

“It’s crazy, I know, but I casually think about it any time I’m even minorly inconvenienced. But what stops me from doing it - like, my next line of thought - is something equally meaningless. Like, in that scenario with my sister, the thing that held me back was like, I thought ‘But fuck, Bohemian Rhapsody is coming out in like two months and I really wanna see that.’”

A couple cheers came through the laughter and you smiled.

“Oh, we got some Queen fans in here tonight?” you said. 

More cheers.

“Yeah, cheer, clap, fuck yeah!”

A swell of shouts and whistles went through the crowd and you joined them.

“Fuck yeah, y’all were raised right,” you said when it settled down. “Queen is a great band. Just four sexy dudes making banger after banger. They’re legitimately my favorite band. I’m not gonna lie, they really got me through some shit, but we’ll come back to my trauma later.”

You paused for a small bit of laughter.

“Now normally, I don’t like when comedians talk about Queen. And by that, I mean, I don’t like it when comedians talk about Freddie Mercury,” you said. “And it’s not for some pretentious reason like they’re not real fans or something. It’s literally just that when people joke about Freddie Mercury, they joke about the same two things - his teeth and his sexuality - two extremely fucking boring things to joke about.”

You took a sip of water.

“Not only are they boring, they’re just rude. Like, these are things this man was born with and couldn’t change about himself - he had no control over that. What he did have control over - the fucking ridiculous lyrics of Under Pressure.”

A giggle went through them. You smiled.

“I’m serious. Have any of you ever looked up the lyrics to that song? Most of it doesn’t really bother me, it’s just those weird scat-like shit Freddie does between verses. Like, they have these great, meaningful lines followed by Freddie going ‘Um, bah, bah, bay.’ What the fuck?”

They laughed.

“That shit is in the official lyrics of that legendary song and I think about that every goddamn day. That and fucking ‘dee, dah, day - ok!’ Shit like that is how you know these dudes were on drugs. One of those guys came up with that, pitched it to four other people - if not more - and they all went ‘fuckin genius’ and bam! Under Pressure is one of the greatest hits of all time.”

They laughed harder.

“I guess I’m not as disturbed by that as I am by the fact that the people ate it up like they did. It’s one thing for those guys to say it’s genius, but then for us as the public to say it as well just fucks me up. The first time I heard that song I was like ‘what the cinnamon toast fuck am I listening to?’ Shit was weird.”

You took another drink as they laughed. 

“But honestly, I don’t understand why people go for Freddie’s sexuality when there are clearly much more roastable things to talk about. I don’t care how rich and famous he was, if you’re a straight white guy making fun of gay brown guy for being either or both of those things, you’re punching down, dude, and that’s not comedy, that’s just being an asshole.”

For that, they applauded. You continued on through your set, and this audience was great for you. They were responsive and you held their attention throughout. You were almost ready to close the show.

“I always like to end my shows with the most important person in my life,” you said. “I’ve talked about her already tonight, and she’s my daughter, Violet.”

The tech guys put a picture of her up on the projector behind you. You beamed at it. 

“That’s her. She’s three years old and she’s my everything. She’s the reason I get on stage and in front of cameras. She’s the real reason I don’t crash my car to get out of moving furniture.”

With one final laugh, you bid them goodnight. You took a little bow at the roar of applause and smiled widely. You said a few more thank yous before the spotlight dimmed and you walked off stage to the sound of cheering and clapping. It never ceased to amaze you how far you had come. 

Someone took the mic for you as your assistant approached. She was a recent hire, and something you initially resisted. But now that your name and brand had grown, you really did need the help. Her name was Stacy, and she was incredibly efficient. You liked her, as did Violet, which sold you on hiring her.

“Great show,” she said with a smile. “Vi is asleep in the green room. We’ve got a couple VIP guests for you to meet before we take you both back to the hotel.”

“Alright, lead the way,” you replied.

You followed her to another room backstage where you saw a group of men. Most of them had their back to you, but one face, you recognized. Gwilym Lee, who you considered a friend, even though you hadn’t spoken in a while.

Before you had really thrown yourself into standup, you did a bit of acting. You and Gwilym shot a pilot of a sitcom that unfortunately never aired, but while filming, you had become really close. You even felt like he was flirting with you a few times, but back then you were nowhere near ready to start a new relationship, so you’d kept things strictly platonic. Nowadays, you mostly liked each others pictures on Instagram as your main form of communication. But life was busy for both of you. You were on tour and he had gone on to films.

You started to smile but then froze when the man next to Gwilym turned his head. You grabbed Stacy’s arm harshly.

“Holy shit is that Brian May?” you wondered.

She chuckled. “Yeah! The VIP guests are Queen and the cast of Bohemian Rhapsody.”

“Shut the fuck up!” you cried. “Really?!”

“Yep,” she assured you. “Go on in and say hello.”

Your stomach dropped with nerves. Again, you shook yourself free of them and donned your stage personality. Slipping into that mask was where you were most comfortable. While you talked about the things you had endured in your comedy, there it was lighthearted, and you did not have to face it head on. You could throw a joke out and dodge it. 

“Well, hello!” you said brightly as you entered the room. 

They all turned eyes on you and smiled as you were introduced. Brian May and Roger Taylor were without a doubt the most thrilling to shake hands with, but Rami Malek, Joe Mazzello, and Ben Hardy were also exciting. When it came time to shake hands with Gwilym, you offered a warm, friendly smile. 

“It’s great to see you again,” you said. “It’s been two years or so now?”

“Just about,” he replied. “You were wonderful.”

“Thank you!”

“Gwil was the one who convinced us to come tonight,” Joe explained. “He said you were hilarious on set when you filmed before.”

“That’s sweet,” you replied. “It is a shame that show never took off, it was a good one.”

“I certainly loved it,” Gwilym said. 

You chatted with them for a bit. They all were calming to be around. Brian and Roger were complimentary of your bit about Under Pressure, which eased some of your nerves about the set. Even though you were, you didn’t feel like you were putting on a show for them. In minutes, it felt like they were your friends. 

The door opened shortly after and in walked Stacy, hand in hand with your very sleepy daughter. She clutched her stuffed dog close to her chest as she ran right to you and crawled into you lap. You wrapped your arms around her and held her close, kissing the top of her head. She eyed the guests warily. 

“What are you doing awake, sweetie?” you asked gently, stroking her hair. 

“She woke up for a little while,” Stacy explained. “I tried to get her back down but all she wanted was Mommy.”

You smiled. “That’s okay. You can have Mommy whenever you want her.”

She snuggled into your chest, turning her face away from the strangers. 

“You don’t want to say hello?” you wondered, and she shook her head. You looked at the guys. “Sorry. She’s kinda shy.”

“That’s alright,” said Brian. 

“She’s grown up,” Gwilym said. “Last time I saw her, she was just learning to walk.”

“Oh, yeah,” you remembered. “She actually walked right into you during a scene.”

You both chuckled at the memory.  

“The director was almost mad, but she was so cute,” he continued. 

He knelt down in front of you and gently touched her arm. She turned her face to just barely peek at him. 

“Hi, Violet,” he said sweetly, smiling at her. “It’s been a while.”

Her brow furrowed. 

“You were still a little baby,” you explained to her. “But you’ve met Gwilym before.”

She relaxed and looked between you and him. 

“Daddy?” she questioned. 

You stiffened and cleared your throat uncomfortably. Then shook your head. 

“No, baby,” you told her. “No Daddy.”

She pouted at you and then hid her face again. You looked apologetically at Gwilym, who shrugged it off. He started to get up, but hesitated to pick something up off the ground. It was your letter that had been in your pocket. He held it out to you. 

“Is this yours?” he asked. 

You quickly took it, your face flushing with embarrassment. Even though there was no way he knew what it was, you still felt really shy about the whole situation. 

“Yeah, thanks,” you said, not meeting his eyes as you stuffed it back into your pocket. 

“A letter?” he questioned. 

“Just some particularly touching fanmail,” you lied. 

“Not enough people write letters anymore in my opinion,” said Roger. 

“Why sit and write a letter when you can send a text?” Ben replied. “It’s much faster.”

“Yeah, but I sort of miss the anticipation involved in letter writing,” Brian said in agreement with his bandmate. 

You continued to visit with them as Violet slowly fell asleep again against you. For a while, you felt Gwilym’s eyes on you intensely. His expression was odd. It appeared he thought he knew something more about you. It made you shift in your seat a few times before at last, he seemed to let go of whatever question was burning in his mind. 

They visited for about another half hour before you really did need to get back to your hotel, and so did they. You said fond farewells to all of them, reassured them that you would see the movie, and then it came to Gwilym. 

“We’re in New York for a few days,” he said. “Let me know if you’d like to get coffee or something and catch up.”

“That would be great,” you replied with a smile. 

You gave him a side hug since you had Violet on your hip, sleeping soundly. Her stuffed dog slipped from her hand but Gwil caught it before it hit the ground and handed it to you. 

“Can’t have that,” he said lightly. 

“Thank you,” you returned, taking it. You looked at all of them. “Have a wonderful night, guys. It was so great chatting with you.”

They all bid you one final farewell. Gwilym was the last to leave and you shared a lingering look with him before he closed the door. You continued to stare at the spot where he disappeared, realizing now how much you had missed him these last couple years. 

“Ready to go to bed?” Stacy asked. 

With a yawn, you nodded, and she ordered an Uber to take all three of you back to the hotel you were staying in. It wasn’t far from the venue, since you would be doing three shows there this week before moving on Boston. Stacy eyed you with an odd smirk as you stared out the car window. Finally, you looked at her. 

“What is it?” you asked, a bit snappier than you intended. 

“You and Gwilym Lee seemed to have a little something going on,” she said with a sly smirk. 

You rolled your eyes. “We just knew each other a couple years ago. Besides, you know I’m...involved with someone.”

“Ah, right,” she said, rolling her eyes now. “The ever elusive Dear Friend.”

“Hey, if anyone’s elusive, it’s me,” you said. “I was the one who made the arrangement what it is.”

“Y/N, you write letters to some mystery man,” she replied. “He could be anyone. Gwilym Lee is a real person and right in front of you.” 

“Dear Friend is a real person,” you argued. “I’ve just never met him.”

“And yet you’re convinced he’s your soulmate,” she returned. “I just don’t get it. How can you fall in love with someone through paper?”

“You don’t understand,” you said. “You’ve never read his letters. He’s so...eloquent and smart. And I can be myself with him. I can share my deepest thoughts and desires without any fear of judgement. He does so with me as well. It’s a real connection. The strongest I’ve ever felt with anyone.”

“You don’t know anything real about each other,” she insisted. “Not your names, not your jobs, where you live-”

“Those things don’t matter,” you cut across her. “The real stuff is deeper than that. And that’s where Dear Friend and I meet.”

“Whatever,” she said dismissively, weary of having this discussion yet again. “You’ve got your family reunion on your last day in town. I suggest you find a man in person to go with you. If you show up without someone again, I think your mother will actually lose her mind.”

You considered this. She was right, your mother absolutely hounded you about your romantic life since Violet was born. You told her you weren’t ready since your marriage had left you so scarred. You didn’t tell her about Dear Friend, though, since you knew she could never understand something like that. Plus, you had only been corresponding for a year.  

“I think Gwilym would go with you,” Stacy said, nudging you with her elbow. 

“I was thinking more along the lines of hiring some actor to be my boyfriend,” you replied. “I don’t want to expose Gwilym to my family. He’s been nothing but nice to me.”

She chuckled. “At least take him up on the coffee. I really think you should explore your options in case this Dear Friend isn’t who he says he is.”

“I will take him up on the coffee,” you assured her. “But it’s not a date. In the meantime, find some poor struggling actor to go with me and get my mother off my back.”

“I’m on it,” she assured you, already looking through her phone to get started. 

You reached the hotel at last. You took Violet to your room, bidding Stacy goodnight as she went to her room next door. You tucked your daughter into bed and kissed her on the forehead before heading over the desk. You pulled out the letter from Dear Friend that was still in your pocket and read it once more. Then you pulled out your stationery and pen to begin your reply. You were halfway through your letter when you remembered Gwilym. 

You opened your phone and pulled up his number, which you had from your days of being coworkers. You opened up a text to send to him and found yourself blanking on what to say. You had written paragraphs to Dear Friend, but when it came to asking someone to get a simple cup of coffee, you had no idea how to phrase it. It made you all the more certain Dear Friend was your person. Words came easily when talking to him. 

You went with your stage personality. You sent a casual, “Is tomorrow too soon for that coffee?” with a silly emoji. Then you returned to your letter. Gwilym texted back almost right away and suggested meeting around nine in the morning, which you agreed to. Then you finished writing your letter and sealed it in an envelope for Stacy to send off in the morning. 

The letters always took some time. One thing you knew about Dear Friend was that he was from the UK. The PO box you sent the letters to was in London, but you could also tell from the way he spelled things. You often teased each other about these differences. So of course, they took longer to send and receive. But, you agreed with Brian May that the anticipation of getting one was one of the most exciting parts of the experience. 

Another benefit of him being across the pond meant that your opportunities to meet were few. In fact, you hadn’t had one since you started writing. It was a bit of a relief. You knew you loved Dear Friend, but keeping him at arm’s (well, ocean’s) length felt safest. And after your brutal marriage to Violet’s father, Henry, being safe was of top priority for you. And yet, the desire to be with Dear Friend grew daily. It just terrified you to face the reality of it. 

The next morning, you dropped the letter and Violet off with Stacy while you went to meet up with Gwilym. You went to a local coffee shop and ordered. You paid, and he protested, but you insisted, and assured him that he could get it next time. You grabbed a table and started talking. You told him you were still living in Los Angeles and that you were mostly doing shows out in California. You tended to avoid New York, since Henry and his friends and family were still there and he was still an NYPD officer. You couldn’t avoid it on tour, though, nor your family reunion. You told Gwilym about the reunion, but not the part about you ex-husband. 

“You’re hiring someone?” he asked, baffled. “A stranger?”

“Yeah,” you said. “Some guy that was rejected from Broadway or something. I’ll pay him, and we’ll come up with a story for my mother, and then the next time I see her I’ll tell her how we tragically broke up.”

“That’s ridiculous,” he said with a laugh. “I’ll do it for you.”

You blinked. “You really don’t have to-”

“I don’t mind,” he said. “We’re friends. I know meeting strange men is difficult for you.”

Gwilym knew that Henry had abused you because you talked about it in your sets. You never got into gruesome detail, although you had confessed a few things to Dear Friend. You talked on stage about not dating because of what you had been through. It was extremely kind of Gwilym to offer this, and you weren’t sure how you could thank him. Your comedian mask slipped on again. 

“I’m not sure I can afford your rates, Mr. Lee,” you teased. 

“How much was my coffee?” he returned. 

“Five dollars,” you told him. 

“Well, it turns out, for friends, I offer a discounted price of five dollars,” he joked. “So, consider it payment for the coffee.”

Your brow furrowed. “Are you sure about this?”

“Really, it’s fine,” he reassured you. “It’s just one day.”

“I can’t tell you how grateful I am,” you said, seriously. 

He raised a curious eyebrow at your tone. 

“I mean, it’s just one of the nicest things,” you continued, blushing once again under his gaze. “You’re a very generous person, Gwilym.”

“Perhaps,” he said. “Or you’re just still getting used to kindness.”

You smiled, unwilling to go any deeper. 

“Let’s chalk it up to a combination of both,” you said lightly. 

You finished your coffees and headed to the door. He had to go to an interview and you were going to take Violet around the city since the weather was nice. As you hugged goodbye, you smiled up at him. 

“See you Saturday?” you asked. 

“Saturday,” he affirmed.

[damn14moans]

BTS reaction to your pregnancy.

Kim Seokjin.

Today was a normal day, nothing boded ill. You and Jin were sitting at home and preparing another cake, because this is your weakness. Laughter and jokes spread throughout the house, you were very happy with your loved one. Suddenly, you started to feel sick, and you ran to the toilet, so as not to arrange anything getting out with a guy who was extremely impressionable. The young man called the doctor that hour, because this is not the first day that has happened to you.

When the doctor arrived examining you, he concluded that you were pregnant. Upon learning this news, Gene immediately cried out: “I will be a dad!”

- '' your name '', you must promise me that you will eat as much as you want, without fear of spoiling the figure. And I will take care of you, trying to become the best father and husband in the world, ”the young man calmly said, sitting down next to you on the bed.

“Have you made me an offer now?” you asked quietly, staring at the guy who nodded, and after that he kissed your forehead.

Min Yoongi / Suga.

- Min Yoongi, get ready, we are going for diapers! - you scream, going into your apartment with a guy. The young man, who was dozing at his desk before that, woke up and shouted to you just as loudly:

- And to whom? Gene isn’t so old to walk in diapers.

- This is our baby, who will appear in seven months, - going into the guy’s office, smiling, you say.

“Wow, why didn't you tell me about this a second before giving birth?” Why not when our child would be two years old? - jokingly began to resent Yungi, looking in your eyes that you were a little scared. The only thing that reassured you was that you and the young man often talked about children, and he wanted a little baby.

- What? I didn’t understand, - restraining you ask, even though you’re ready to pounce on your beloved with fists.

“Yes, I'm joking, silly.” Come here, kiss, ”Yungi says, smiling with a warm smile.

Jung Hosoek / J-hope.

“One, two, three, four ...” - you hear the score of Hosoek engaged in the hall. Before the comeback, the guy did not get out of the Big Hit building, rehearsing a new dance. The young man was inspired by his work and the release of a new album, working day and night.

“Three months, or rather a third,” you giggled as you entered the hall. Hearing you, the guy stopped, stepping closer and wrapping you in a hug.

- What is the third month? - the purr purred in your ear, and then smacked on the cheek.

“I'm in the third month, love!” - You answered smiling, winking at Hosoek, a smile spreading on his face.

- This is great news! Today we’re going to buy a stroller and crib, Darling! The guy whispered to you, taking his hand and kissing her.

Kim Namjooon / Rap Monster.

“I want to smile,” Namjoon says calmly, walking with you in the park. You have long worn your baby under your heart, but are afraid to tell the news to the guy.

“I'm pregnant, dear,” fiddling the hem of the dress, you say, and the guy only sighs sadly.

“Another child on my head, I have six of them,” Namjoon groans, and your heart goes into heels. Noticing your facial expression, he takes you by the arms, interlacing your fingers, and says, sincerely smiling:

“This is the best news of my life, my love!” We can handle it!Imagine how the guys will mess with our baby doll, they have been waiting for this for a long time. Jimin ate my whole brain about the fact that he wants to hear the clatter of small legs on the floor and the cries of "Uncle Jimin."

Park Jimin.

- I want a baby! I want a baby! - Jimin whimpers, sitting on the couch next to you at the moment when the projector shows a married couple with a child. This happens every time a young man sees children.

“You will have a baby,” you smile, massaging your beloved's head, because he, like a cat, purrs from this.

- Truth? And when? - Jimin asks enthusiastically, snuggling up to you.

“After seven months, Darling,” you smile, while the guy's eyes light up with happiness, and he kisses you on the lips.

Kim Taehyung / V.

- Honey, here’s a magic box for you, go do the test. I can’t stand it anymore! Moaned Taehyung, tucking a box of dough into your hands, for which he had to get up and go to the pharmacy, which is around the corner. The guy suffered your toxicosis for several days, but today he did not have the patience or strength to watch how you are suffering. At the actions of a loved one, you nodded, running away to the bathroom. A few minutes later you left the bathroom with the test done in your hands, on which two strips were depicted.

- I am pregnant! - you scream joyfully, running up to Taehyung, because you know how much he wanted a baby.

- Well, finally, otherwise I thought I couldn’t wait! - hugging and kissing you on the lips, the young man shouted just as joyfully.

Jeon Jungkook.

You understood that Jungkook was still young in order to have children, but circumstances forced you to tell him this news. Whether she will be joyful or not, the guy will decide.

You have chosen the right moment to tell Jungkook. The guy was sitting on the couch waiting for you, because you agreed to watch a movie together. As soon as you sat next to the guy, he grabbed you into an embrace, pressing him closer to him.

- I do not want to pull. Honey, I'm pregnant, ”you said calmly, turning your head in the direction of your beloved. The guy grinned, smacking you on the nose, and then just as calmly answered:

- I know, according to my estimates, about the second month.

- How do you know? - you asked, arriving in shock, because no one knew about your situation.

“I noticed this and estimated the approximate time when you were eating herring with strawberry ice cream with such a strong appetite,” the young man answered broadly, and you only snuggled in more, knowing that this was your man for life and after her.

[goliath-de-senfina-sango]

Local Teenager has Trippy Dream and Realizations About Family Importance, Family of Local Geniuses not Aware of how Genius they Are, Deceased Poacher not very Smart, Attacks Local Ghost Hunters, Local Family Discusses the Importance of Failsafes

Voices, vaguely familiar and carrying warmth called out to him.  They called his name, the sound distant and irrelevant, so small it is lost to the hearts of stars singing deep beneath the soil.  Lost to the blooming nebulas staining the dark sky with color, miles upon miles of light and rivers of fire and the promise of something new.  Danny can almost hear the words and language they speak; something so close, so distant, something he has never known -- but they ring with such magnificent, terrible truth that he thinks, maybe he has always known them. Maybe they have always lived inside him, alongside the bones. These melodies, these words, that burn with such ferocious clarity that if he just spoke them aloud then the far would become near and he could reach out and pluck the stars from the sky and cradle them in his hands.

Danny woke up in his bed, surrounded by the warm press of his friends.  The music of his dreams fading to the farthest and darkest reaches of his mind and leaving Danny grasping at nothing for them.  So instead of the music he could barely hear the faintest notes of, Danny focused on his friends. His ears had grown so capable that with some focus he could hear even their heartbeats, and at the moment he was glad.  His friends’ pulses were a reassuring sound, as much as the feeling of them pressed against his body and breathing right next to him on either side - reassurance that they were truly there.

Slipping between the rhythmic dances of their ever vibrating molecules, Danny got out of the bed and landed on his feet near silently.  A glance at the clock told him it was 7:10 AM and Danny was beyond glad that it was Saturday. Holding in a yawn, he walked straight to the bathroom, did his routine, and headed downstairs in just his binder and boxers, as everyone in the household had seen him in already.

Or so he thought.  There was a woman in a purple suit with a tie and curly hair sitting in one of the chairs in his living room, holding up an electronic recorder.  And his parents and sister were on the couch, everyone fully dressed. And staring at him. In his underwear. Considering he just let loose a string of swears therein, he hoped the lady didn’t speak Mandarin.

Three minutes later Danny came down in a purple shirt bearing the FMA logo on it and some sweat pants.  “Uh, hi?”

“Danny, I told you about this interview already,” Jazz said through grit teeth.  “This is Souda Ayodele from Genius magazine.” A quick look on the second layer of everything showed that her aura was one of angry beige bees.

Danny turned to stare at the reporter.  “Hi there.” Ms. Ayodele waved back, and Danny walked past the entire event to the kitchen.  “Eggs, or Cereal?” Danny hummed, before catching his mother’s voice pointing out that her focus was ghost hunting.  “Oh, this will be hilarious.” Grabbing cereal, a bowl, and milk, Danny used his intangibility to speed up getting everything together and grabbing a spoon.  He was on the couch in time to hear Jazz claim that ghost hunting was a hobby.

“What they’re really involved in is inventing.”  Jazz smiled, trying to steer the conversation to somewhere safe and normal.

“True, we do invent a majority of the time.  I’ve personally worked on improving the power sources for all of our things around Fentonworks.  Though, we do mechanical engineering as well,” Mom said as Danny ate his cereal.

Dad pulled out one of their holographic projectors and hit the button to let it float.  “I have a full inventory of our inventions right here actually! For instance-”

“Dr. Fenton” Ayodele said, clearly having been here long enough to know that if she didn’t just interrupt then Dad would keep talking.  “Pardon the interruption, but is that...device, um...floating?"

Dad and Mom blinked, looking at each other. Even Danny and Jazz cocked their heads at the question. Their parents had been toying around with hover engines for years, what was the big deal about that?

"Well, yes," Mom began. "That's a patented Fenton Gravity Inverter."

"And...how much can your...um, Gravity Inverter lift?" The reporter asked again.

"Approximately one metric ton, depending on the model." Dad shrugged. "But the Gravity Inverter is only a small part of the FentonWorks itinerary, such-”

"I'm sorry, but just to confirm: your laboratory has successfully created a device which can lift a ton of weight into the air without the energy requirements being prohibitive?" The reporter asked finally.

"Yes," Mom explained slowly as if talking to a child. "It's a relatively simplistic application of physics. Both Danny and Jazz, our children, have been building them for us for years while my husband and I focused on more advanced applications of our research. The Gravity Inverter is, quite literally, 'kids stuff.' In fact, I think Danny built the model that we eventually decided on using for the Fenton Holoprojector."

“A waste of an afternoon since I coulda been working on my paints,” Danny muttered around his cereal.

Ayodele turned to the kids fully.  “Mr. and Ms. Fenton, is what your parents saying true?"

Danny shrugged, clearing his throat as he nodded. "Ah, sure. I mean, those things are pretty easy, I could almost build one in my sleep nowadays.  I’m even using one for a side project I’m doing with a friend. They're not like Physics Cancelers or anything, right Jazz?"

"I guess they're pretty easy," Jazz shrugged, uncomfortable with being the center of attention. "Mom and dad only ask us to work with the safe stuff anyway. None of this is too complicated." Jazz turned to her parents, "If you're using the Model II that Danny built for the Projector, why did you want me to put together a Model VI last week?”

Mom smiled, "Oh, that's for the Specter Speeder, sweetie. We'll be showing that off a little later.  At any rate, though, we would like to get on with the demonstration now. Jack, honey, if you would?"

“Rightio Mads!”  Dad pulled out a remote from his pocket and a projection of an oblong, missile-like object coated in shiny metal and streamlined with a flaming F decal on both sides.  The projection spun in the air at Dad’s press of a button.

"The Fenton Ghost Zone Probe," Mom began, “When finished, will be launched into the Ghost Portal and take numerous measurements including temperature, ecto-thermography, radiospectronomy, and more...of course, this will include video and audio data!"

“Did you say… Ghost Portal?”  The woman looked remarkably uneased by the implications of there being a ghost portal, which was understandable.  Danny wasn’t a fan of the fact himself. Just realizing how easily he slid through matter without even a second thought had Danny shuddering.

“Yup!  We can’t exactly show ya that one just yet,” Dad said with a sigh.  “We didn’t prepare for a presentation proper. We can, however, describe to you exactly how it works!”

And so Dad did just that and Danny tuned him out, eating his cereal since he’d heard this all before about six times.  Instead, he focused on the look of mounting horror on Jazz’s face and counted the seconds before she interrupted Dad again.

“The portal isn’t what we’re here to talk about, Dad!”  Wow, a full 36 seconds. Danny was impressed. “Can we talk about your work in energy?  A self-regenerating energy source?”

“Ectoplasm, Jazz.”  Danny pointed with his spoon.  “They’re converting some of the nuclear batteries to use reactions with ectoplasm instead of the usual stuff.”

“Nuclear… batteries?”  The poor reporter looked so lost and Danny had to wonder why.  Did he say something about ghosts? Well beyond ectoplasm but everyone knew ghosts were made of ectoplasm.  “Do the two of you work at a nuclear facility?”

“No?”  Mom frowned.  “We have nuclear batteries in our ghost hunting technology.”

“The entire facility is powered by a reactor under the labs.”  Danny rolled his eyes. “And solar panels on the roof and a backup geothermal generator.  Actually, all of our windows are solar panels too. I’m pretty sure Mom and Dad are just looking for ways to replicate those effects with ectoplasm?”

“Like we told you, Danny, it’s far more efficient in storage and output of energy than any material we’ve found on earth or any other dimension.”

“I know Mom, I just… I dunno, expected something new?”  Danny shrugged and slurped up the milk from his now-empty bowl, relishing in Jazz’s glare.  “Well, I’m gonna be upstairs having fun.” It was then that Danny spotted Tucker and Sam on the stairs, Sam in her black jeans and a Dumpty Humpty shirt she left last time she stayed over and Tucker in a button-up of Danny’s.  “Guys, c’mon, ignore the interview we’ve got funner stuff to do.”

“That’s not a word, Danny.”  Sam rolled her eyes. “This explains why English teachers hate you.”

“Oh please,” Danny chuckled as he headed into the kitchen, waiting for Sam and Tucker to grab their breakfast.  “The teachers love me. Lancer’s just a pain.”

“Dude,” Tucker said as he grabbed a bag of bacon bits like they were chips and started eating.  “You guys have nuclear reactors in your house?”

“Well not in this house specifically but yeah,” Danny shrugged.  “Did you think we were on the city’s power grid or something?”

“Actually honey we’re supplying power to the whole town,” Mom called out, displaying that all mothers were supernatural entities that could hear anything.

“Huh.  Well, there ya go.”  Danny shrugged and headed to and up the stairs.  Sam and Tucker soon followed, Sam holding a bowl full of fruit.  “Did you put that there yesterday?”

“Yes, you need healthier food in this house, Danny - also why am I only just learning that you guys power the entire town?”  Sam was scowling at him, and Danny wasn’t sure what he’d done this time.

“Because I only just found out?”

“What did you mean by This house, Danny?”  Tucker sat on Danny’s bed while Sam got into his desk chair.  “Do you guys have more than one house?”

“Yeah, FentonWorks is the entire block.”  Judging by his friends’ expressions, Danny hadn’t told them this.  “I guess it never came up?” Danny held up a game disc. “Did you think I built our HorrorStations in my room?”  Danny slid the disc into the hand made console, grabbed his controller, and sat next to Tucker.

Before Tucker could respond, Danny felt a chill run up his spine, into his lungs and past his lips and he looked around on the second realm, but he was too late.  The robot Sam had described appeared, right behind Danny, arm aimed point-blank at him. A net shot out and tangled around Danny’s body, throwing him off the bed and into his own console.  In seconds, all three of them were bound in blue nets. “Hello, Ghost Child.”

“Who are you?”  Danny arched a brow.  He needed a moment to pull that power of brilliant, life granting stars into his muscles.  If he transformed inside the house for a fight his parents would not only notice but come up and see his ghost form instead of him.

“I am Skulker,” the robot said, holding up a holographic projection of a cage filled with green abominations unto all gods Danny could think of.  “A collector of things rare and unique. And you, ghost child, are that and more.” Skulker laughed, far more dramatically than he deserved to, and took a step, Danny’s rocket cracking and shattering into pieces.

“That’s my fucking rocket!”  Green fire filled Danny’s veins and he tore the net off of himself, rising to put some dents in the robot.  But when he reached into himself proper, that ice-cold void, heatless and full of lights that no other human being could ever claim to see, he was burned and staggered backward.  “I built that! Just like this!” The Wrist Ray™ struck Skulker in the chest, burning a hole in him, and Danny felt that fire drain out of him into the weapon.

Sam and Tucker behind him used their own wrist rays to cut through the nets, and Sam’s shot from her crouch on the ground sailed over Skulker’s ducking head, leaving a dent in Danny’s wall.  Skulker hit a button on his wrist and the nets began to snap and crackle. Danny reached out and snatched Tucker away before he could get zapped, and kicked the net away from Sam’s feet. He let go just fast enough that neither of them felt the shocks when they raced up into his body and forced his every muscle to tense up - nerves ablaze with screams that he couldn’t make.

Tucker raised his Wrist Ray ™  but Skulker shot it off of his wrist and he yelped.  “Holy shit!”

“Come now, ghost boy, I expected this to be far more of a challenge.  And yet here you are, easily cowed by the merest targeting of your little friends?”  Skulker’s words barely reached Danny’s ears. All he could hear was the rushing of his blood and pain.  Just as the current died down, Danny’s vision blacked out when Sam’s Wrist Ray shot missed the netting itself and hit his foot instead.

The door opened with a bang.  “GET THE HELL AWAY FROM MY SON!”  BOOM Skulker was blasted back by Dad’s bazooka into the wall, and Danny’s vision slowly returned to him.  “Jasmine, take your brother to the infirmary! Kids, get out of here!”

Skulker launched a net at Dad but Mom came to the rescue with her own cannon fire.  It struck Skulker right in the net launcher and ripped off a piece of paneling on his arm.  With a snarl, Skulker took in his surroundings and reached down to grab something purple, before fading from sight and quickly vacating Danny’s range of extra senses.

And soon that didn’t matter because Danny was being rushed down to the infirmary and he could hear Sam and Tucker telling his parents what had happened, ignoring the reporter entirely.  Letting out a cough, Danny turned to Jazz and flashed a grin. It felt more like a grimace. “Hey, I stopped them from embarrassing you in that interview right?”

“You’re a disaster, little brother.”  Jazz took a breath and carded a hand through his hair like she always did when he was hurt.  “We’re gonna get you better, and when you’re better you’re gonna explain to me what the hell you were thinking.”

“Sure thing, Spazz.”  Danny chuckled and sighed.  “I think I need a nap.”

Danny reaches out, eyes transfixed on the distant hearts of stars. One whisper is all it needs. He could do it. He can. If he could just shape the cold clay of his lips.

Danny opened his eyes to the sight of Jazz, Tucker, Sam and his Mom all sitting around the infirmary and doing things.  Sam was looking through one of her scrapbooks while Tucker did something on one of his PDAs - didn’t Skulker fly off with the other one?  Jazz was reading a book about trauma and Mom was checking something on a holographic display. Everything was unnervingly quiet, and for a moment Danny considered going back to sleep.  Rare and unique.  Enough of a freak that some ghost would come hunting me down just to say to the rest of the Underworld ‘hey look, I caught the weirdo!’ regardless of who got in his way or what I have to say about it.  Horologium, with how I rip apart ghosts that piss me off bad enough, I might as well be one of the weird Things that he was showing off in his little hologram.

Instead of dwelling on how his very fucked up existence that shouldn’t have been was putting his family in danger now, he sat up.  His muscles were sore and stiff, and he let out a pained groan from the action, but Danny was at least relieved that he could move at all.  “Okay, remind me never to touch another live wire again.” He saw his friends wince and shrugged before wincing again himself.

“Danny!  Oh, honey don’t try to move too much, alright?”  Mom came to his side in the blink of an eye, checking him over for any signs of electrical burns.  “Oh Danny, baby, are you alright?”

“I’m about as sore as Zephyrus was about Hyacinthus, but I think I’ll be alright.  Though, I’d love to never have to deal with that again.” Danny let out a sigh and laid his head back. I’d also love to be done with this getting better thing.  What was it that Mom and Dad said about ectoplasm? It can absorb electromagnetic energy?   Danny closed his eyes and reached out for the dangling threads of buzzing whines in the lights and sockets, pulling it into himself clumsily.  He bit back a yelp and felt his arm practically convulse when the electricity went the wrong way. Note to self, don’t try that in human form again.  Human bodies are complicated.

“Flex your muscles slowly and methodically, Danny,” Tucker said.  “Gotta get your blood flowing. And check for nerve damage, cause electricity is horrible for the body.  Speaking of, thank you for pulling us out of those nets."

Sam came over and held out a hand, looking slightly unsure as to what she wanted to do.  "Gods, I'm so sorry for shooting you in the foot."

Danny laughed, ignoring the pain of tensing muscles because that was the last thing anyone needed to apologize for as far as Danny was concerned.   "You got the net off yourself by blasting it so you blasted the net on my foot, it's cool. Though, if we end up netted again, please just grab something non-conductive to knock the net away."

"There will be no Next Time, pumpkin.  The anti-ghost defense grid is up and running and no nasty ghost robot is getting in here to target you."

"Thanks, Mom."  Danny let out a sigh and felt something uncurl in relief.  He was safe at home, at the very least. "So Jazz, I think I owe you a thought process."

"That is correct, Second."

"Well, False Maturity, I was thinking, 'that button has something to do with those nets. If I get them away from Sam and Tuck, he can't hurt them with them.' And so I tried doin that."

"My boy the hero!"  Dad came barreling into the room and immediately scooped Danny up into a hug.  "Gave us all a scare! That ecto scum will think twice before trying to attack FentonWorks now!"

“I’ve been told… lungs are important.”  Danny hugged back anyway of course, he wasn’t going to leave this hug ever.

“Mom, Dad,” Jazz piped up.  “The things that come out of the portal are clearly dangerous.  One attacked Danny in his room! Why haven’t we shut down the portal yet?”  The squeeze of Dad’s hug got uncomfortably tighter.

“We’ve tried, Jazzerincess, can’t get the darn thing to turn off.”  Danny felt his blood run even colder.

“What?” Mom sighed and ran a hand over her face.  “We unplugged it, cut all the power from the portal but it seems to be self-sustaining.  All we can do is block it up with those blast doors.”

For several moments there was silence while everyone digested that they had no solid way of keeping the ghosts out of their world.  And I'm the one who opened the door in the first place.

Sam cleared her throat.  "Drs. Fenton? I know who the ghost is.  He told us during his monologing he died putting down the last female purple back gorilla in a hunt.  Name’s Hunter Grosvenor.” Sam sneered around the name as though it were the most disgusting piece of meat she'd had to swallow in her life.

Danny covered his mouth with his hand, curling his fingers into a fist slowly.  Blowing air into it, he resisted the urge to growl. Tucker glared at the sky, daring Skulker to appear so he could dismantle him personally.  “I’ve not felt so incredibly violent in a while. I need videogames-"

"Actually," Tucker interrupted with a sigh.  "Your Horrorstation broke in all the fighting.  The scrap heap also stole my PDA."

"First he gives my best friend a burn on her stomach, then he breaks my models and now my videogames?  When I next see Skulker, I'm going to burn a hole through his faceplate." Danny groaned, laying his head back.   "Can I get a moment with Sam and Tuck?"

"Of course, son."  Dad set him down and ruffled his hair, more gentle with Danny than he ever remembered him being.  The air around Dad was vaguely orangish and Danny let the tiniest bit of ectoplasm reach his eyes.  The orange air around his dad, probably an aura, was tinged with echoes of sour fear and boiling anger that had Danny ready to crawl out of his skin, grab a gun and hunt Skulker down himself.  "You kids go on and do that research project of yours! Mads and I will hunt down that putrid undead creep and rip it apart on a molecular level!"

Danny had never felt so conflicted about something his Dad had said.  On one hand, I'd love for him to destroy Skulker. On the other, the dehumanizing way he says it is disturbing as all hell.

Just as the Fenton Adults left the room, Dad turned around with a big grin.  "By the way Danny, I'm proud of you for looking out for your friends like that."

A wave of something brilliant and blue and love pride relief joy slammed into Danny and filled him from the inside out.  And as the door closed, Danny flexed his fingers and rolled his joints.  Danny stood up and stretched. "Holy shit guys, I think that Dad just healed me up a bit."

"Sweet.  Think he can spread that around or is that a You thing?"  Tucker looked ready to take notes since Danny didn't have his notebook on him.

Danny closed his eyes and focused, gently pulling that cool void up and letting it fill his eyes and ears and every nerve on his body.   He opened his eyes and Danny saw the world bathed in that extreme indigo-like color that seemed to come off of every person he looked at.  Looking closer, he noticed faint blue strings leading from him to his Dad and Mom and Jazz upstairs and a silver string leading to Tucker and Sam each.   Reaching out to grasp the one that he just knew belonged to Jazz Danny was floored by so potent and blended a mix of positivity, concern, and manic energy that he had to stumble back into the bed.  "Danny?"

"Just a me thing.  Definitely. I can see these… strings, connecting me to you guys and my family.  Like spider threads. But like, made of emotions?" He rubbed his temples and hummed.  "Ectoplasm is psychoreactive so maybe it's like, a connection between us made semi tangible to my ghost because of how much ectoplasm is normally around here?  You guys definitely got hit by ectoplasm in spades when the portal activated, so that explains why I can see it linking me to you guys too…"

"Hey.  Science boy."  Sam nudged his hip with her foot and Danny arched a brow at her.   "Save the theories for later. We need a game plan to deal with the guy as soon as possible.  Grovsner was a very efficient hunter if a sadistic bastard.”

Danny sighed and nodded, sitting back down.  “Well, what do we know about him?” Tucker began tapping away at his PDA, eyes moving quickly.

“I know that you’re probably not gonna find anything on the internet.  I had done a report on his barbaric treatment toward animals for an extra credit project and when I looked back for them, on all the same sites as before.  Nothing.” Sam groaned. “But, I do remember what it was he typically did on a hunt for a protected species. He had hunting dogs, laid all kinds of traps, the works.  I’m not sure what kind of things ectoplasm can do to a net besides making it gooier, but being able to phase into walls and crawl spaces where you usually go to is something he’s definitely going to take advantage of.”

“So my locker is probably gonna be rigged to explode, I have to worry about hell hounds, and he has nets that might fall on me on the way to the library or just to like, GameStop.”  Danny leaned back, closing his eyes. “That sounds fun.”

"You assume there are hell hounds," Tucker snorted.

"Of course there are."

"Because you so want there to be ghost dogs."

"Tucker.  Imagine it.  A dog that doesn't poop, just cuddles up with you and gives you infinite love."

"Don't all dogs go to Heaven, Danny?"

"I have strong evidence that there is no such thing as Heaven just like. A door down.  Literally past that wall over there."

"Fair enough."  Tucker sighed and laid his head back.   Then he sat straight up with a grin. "You know what's a great way of being harder to trap?"

"Intelligence?"

"Mobility, Sam.  If we finish those hoverboards we should be able to avoid most of his land traps!"  Danny and Tucker beamed at each other and high fived each other.

"I'm good to go on that!  Sam, wanna learn how to-"

"You guys can have your geek things, Danny, I'm heading upstairs to make use of all your handhelds."  Sam smiled and held her hands up, walking to the stairs. "Scream if you need me."

"Same to you!"  Danny grinned and headed to the door that lead to the main lab.

“You know how your gravity inverter™ works better than I do so I’m gonna work on like, an AI.  No, Danny don’t give me that look, it’s just for navigation, it isn’t self improving or anything like that.  I just want something to help me not crash into things when flying.”

[melbenoisthf]

Norway for two | Toby

When: Jan 27th, 2018

Where: Norway

Who: Melissa and @rxgbxner

What: Toby invites Melissa to Norway and drinking leads to things

Summery: The Chatzy cut us off of the eariler posts. But it was them going on the plane ride drinking , the ride from the airport and talking. Going to his room so he can set up a projector to watch blue planet. Melssia bouncing on the bed and Toby saying to stop that lead to the next post.

---

Melissa smiled at him "Duh I don't mind and maybe I can steal one of the other ones on set for you" she winked and then laughed. Only kidding she coudn't take someone elses suit. But she would let him use her own anytime really. She loved her show so she was glad to hear that she watched it. "We do" she teased him a moment. "Why do you think my ex husband dont talk to me" she winked. She didn't really do anything but they just didn't talk anymore. She took a long drink needing it, she had so much going on and wanted to forget some things. "oh...whats that?" she asked putting her hand on him.

Toby smirked. “Somehow I don’t think the skirts and cape will suit me as good as they suit you. I don’t have the legs for it.” There was a beat of silence as he looked over her. He didn’t really know anything about her ex or their situation, and he didn’t want to say anything out of turn but she didn’t seem hurt. “Honestly? He sounds like an idiot,” he smiled softly, “his loss, especially if you have some secret wild side.” Toby’s gaze dropped to her hand. “Me,” He grinned, boldly. Trying to keep the conversation light, despite the fact her simple touch sent a new lease of heat pulsing under his skin.

Melissa looked at him and laughed. "I think you got more legs then you think" she smiled at him. She hadn't had a male friend try on her suit yet. Some of her female friends yes but none of the guys. Well besides the cape many have put that on for fun. She sighed "He is I wanted to make nice with him but nope he freezes me out" she let it go she didn't care anymore. Maybe it was the Jack already hitting her why she was saying so much. "Oh really?" she teased him moving her hand up his leg then put her hand on his cheek. 'you seem to sweet to bounce on"

Toby looked down at his legs, “Oh they’re long, but they’re definitely not made for your kind of costume.” He shot her an apologetic look. He’d been in a couple of relationships but none had been serious enough to have any real effect on him when they ended. “Then I wouldn’t waste your time... You clearly deserve better,” he murmured, tucking a loose strand of hair behind her ear. Toby’s breath hitched as her hand moved up his leg, reaching for the bottle to take a long swig of his own because he definitely needed some liquid courage if he was going to get through the night. “Or maybe your just more innocent than you lead me to believe,” he shot back.

Melissa smiled a moment "Leg's is what you need to pull off the skirt so... I so need to see you in the skirt" she winked. Sure that he could pull it off and rock it. The skirt, the tights and stuff really made a good look. Being married felt like another life to her. Even more for the fact that he didn't want anything to do with Melissa anymore. She had a few drinks on the plane too, so she was already very relaxed and halfway gone. So right now Billy wasn't even on her mind, that love thing did scare her and his thoughts were not in her mind. "I am so not a Marley Rose...." she said with a wink before she took a long swig and kissed him.

Toby shook his head, “no, there’s no way that you’re getting me in a skirt. That’s all your forte.” Of course, with a plane ride so long the Jack wasn’t their first drink of the night. And with her talking about her ex it had never even crossed his mind that she might have something going on currently. It was all new territory for him - he wasn’t exactly a lothario and it definitely wasn’t in his nature to get involved in a one night stand but the alcohol clearly had him buzzed. He returned the kiss, his mouth moving lazily against hers, nipping her bottom lip between his teeth and tugging it gently before deepening it. His hand sliding down from her shoulder, over her breast.

Melissa had to pout "Oh come on you to try it on for me" she said putting her lip out. "Please" she teased him. She was a bit drunk already and didn't really care what she was talking about and what she was doing. She smiled at the return on the kiss, enjoying it. she nibbled on his lip as they kissed once more. while her hand moved from his leg to under his shirt before she started tug at it

Toby had to admit that it was hard to say no when she was looking as him like /that/. “Stop pouting,” his thumb brushed over her lower lip, “it’s not going to work - it’s going to take a lot more than a plead.” He could taste the alcohol on her lips. His muscles fluttering slightly under her touch as her hand made contact with his skin. He broke away for second to pull his shirt over his head - discarding the clothing on the floor as his lips collided with hers again, his mouth trailing from hers down her jaw to her neck.

Melissa kept it up to try and win, she wanted to see him in the skirt. "No.... I need to see you in the skirt....pleaseee....." she said acting as cute as she could. "You're cute and cute people wear skirts ...it will make your legs look so good" she smiled at him. She kissed him deeply again and laid back with him once his shirt was off that lead her to clothes going off one by one along with his. Kissing lead to more, and more . soon it was all over and she was just wrapped up in a blanket tired. "I think we bounced to much...the movie is ..gone...

Toby raised an eyebrow. “No, cute girls wear skirts... it’s not going to happen.” It was all a mix of drunken groans and breathy gasps until they were both lying on their backs staring up at the ceiling, struggling to catch their breath. “Yeah...” he mumbled, his head falling to the side so he could look at her, “that was your fault... you’re the one that wanted a round two.”

Melissa "what do you think a kilit is men wear that, and i think it's hot a man wearing a skirt" she winked. Hoping that he would cave in and do it. She let out a breath for a moment before she looked over at him."Well you're the one that said you are bouncy" she let out a breath, feeling a bit better now. She felt so stuck and busy before and it was nice now. "Oh just wait till we didnt spend hours on a plane before" she closed her eyes to rest

Toby chewed his lower lip, rolling his eyes and sighing before he nodded his agreement. “Fine, when we’re back in LA, or Canada I will put the skirt on for you.” He grinned, meeting her eye. “I was true to my word.” Toby rolled over, slinging an arm around her waist as he finally let the jet lag take over.

Melissa smiled a moment clapping a little. "Oh yes you will look so good" she teased him as she snuggled into him. After all the traveling and what they had done she was very tired and wanted to get some sleep. "Night night...or whatever time it is" she said kissing him once more before she closed her eyes and slept

Toby must have fallen asleep at some point during the night - not that he could remember much of it. He blinked himself awake as the light streamed in through the blinds - squinting his eyes slightly and wincing as his head began to pound. He glanced over at the naked body beside him. Trying to move as subtly as possible so he didn’t wake her.

Melissa slept pretty hard once she fell a sleep. It was a good sleep after a long day and night, so they slept in. But next thing she knew she felt someone move a little so she woke up. But didn't open her eyes for a moment. Once she did she looked up for a moment and smiled before she noticed something. She didn't know this room, was she naked? She looked around to see what was going on and over to see.... not who she thought would be there. She grabbed the blanket to cover herself up. "go...." she said just not looking at him.

Toby shot her a worried look momentarily. He wasn’t exactly sure how these things were supposed to go, he’d only ever been with people while he was in a committed relationship, but he knew that he wasn’t supposed to be met with a look of disgust the following morning. A string of mumbled apologies left his lips - so fucking British -, his back turned to her because it suddenly felt like a violation of privacy to look before he moved to leave the room. Clearly it was a conversation to be had for another time.

Melissa sat up once he was gone still staying covered up. "Oh my god..." she looked around seeing it was Tobys room. She shook her head thinking a moment and resting before she got up and got her clothes on. Not finding her bag in the room she used her hand to fix her hair while she looked in the mirror. "I'm stupid...fuck.." she said to herself. She was hurting her head hurt a lot, her body was sort from what they did the night before. Once she was ready it was maybe a half hour later once she was ready to go down stairs. She was fully dressed and covered in her clothes and she still put a blanket around her as she walked down stairs and found him. "...I... I would say I need to go home but..." she knew she was far away

Toby ‘s mind had been racing. As far as he remembered, he’d been respectful - he hadn’t pushed her into anything, he’d asked if it was okay; he always did. But he still couldn’t help but feel slightly guilty without properly knowing why. She clearly was disappointed and it definitely wasn’t the best feeling in the world. Toby straightened up slightly when she entered the room. “I could... I mean I could arrange a flight or something if that’s what you wanted?” He chewed his lower lip, attempting to meet her eye for the first time. “I’m sorry.”

Melissa looked at him, he seemed nervous or scared. That he didn't know what was going on. So she never said anything about Billy to him was her guess so he had no idea. He was not a problem, good guy, it was really good last night. but it was really wrong and she knew it. "No need waste money I can wait...." she said looking around a moment. "You...I should of known better" she looked at him. "I'm just gonna say it" she said looking at him away. "I... have...well now had a boyfriend back... he's in NY working" she said lookign down she hated herself right now.

Toby tapped his fingers against the table - bobbing his foot up and down uncomfortably until she began to talk again. There was a beat of stunned silence before he managed to take everything in. “Oh...” He rocked back slightly on his chair. “If I had known I wouldn’t have... I mean I just assumed when you were talking about your ex that you were... single, you know?” He sighed softly, “Your secrets safe with me if you want to keep your boyfriend. We can pretend like it never happened.”

Melissa knew he had to be surprised and he was by the look on his face. She let him speak then shook his head. "No... I cant do that" she said and went and sat down on a chair near by him. "My ex-husband he really messed me up.. .not like hurting me but we broke up and now he acts like we never met ...like I am on another world or something now my... who i am with now says he loves me and it's only been a couple months.." she explained. "I don't want to love ... not yet not again..." she bit her lip. "Sorry..I knew I wanted to get drunk and forget things..but " she huffed. "i am gonna tell him I cant be that one that cheats and hides it"

Toby raised his eyes, watching her as she approached him. He ex husband did seem like a real asshole and he could see where she was coming from. Mistakes happened all the time, especially when emotions were flying all over the place and you were jaded from being drunk. “You know... you could have just told him?” Toby bit his lower lip, “if he loves you, I’m sure he would have understood. He might even still understand now...” He swung his legs and nodded his head - it was admirable really. “He’s not going to want to kill me, is he? I mean, if it’s any consolation, you can tell him I don’t remember a great deal of it. I can wipe it from my memory.”

Melissa snuffed she was crying during this. She just was a mess why she was admitting it all to Toby right now. She looked at him a moment then away it was hard right now. She knew what they did and it kept replaying in her head because she felt so bad. "No one can be okay with that, I cant..." she said looking at him. "I don't love him...I like him he's sweet and kind...but ..." she shook her head. "Uhh" she bit her lip. "He played Pennywise....so... " hse made a face her only way to to lighten the mood. "Do you not really?" remember anything?"

Toby couldn’t help but feel sorry for her. It was obvious that she wasn’t a bad person, and she hadn’t came out with the intention to hurt anyone. He tentatively wrapped an arm around her shoulders to try and offer her some form of comfort. “You can’t help your feelings if that’s not what you want... Given, you probably could have used different means of figuring it out or ending it but... maybe it’s what needed to happen? In a really messed up kind of way.” Toby played slightly. “Oh, fuck.” He shrugged. “No, I remember quite a lot but I don’t think he needs to hear about me knowing what his girlfriend looks like naked.”

Melissa she felt so bad right now, so guilty she had never done anything like this before. But after everything with Blake and now this she was sure that the idea of love wasn't for her. She knew if she really liked Billy she couldn't of done anything her heart wouldn't let her. But the fact that it happened that she remebers how good it was did say something. "In a I am gonna kill him way he's gonna be so sad..." she knew it he was a such sweet guy. "Yeah..." she bit her lip over the role that Billy played. "He wont know I wont say who you are... " she said looking at him she hugged him, just needing a hug. "so you...remember...."

Toby nibbled his lower lip and shrugged. “At least your telling him, right? And you never know... he’ll probably forgive you. It’s not like you done it maliciously - and if worse comes to worst I’ll gladly take the blame. I mean, I did sort of get you into it. I asked you to so...” He returned her hug. “Yeah,” he murmured shyly, “I was drunk, I don’t have short term memory loss. I remember quite a lot.”

Melissa looked at him and signed "I have too" she would feel to bad to not. Soon as she got back she would sit Billy down and tell him. "I feel like he would but... I don't feel like it's right if I can sleep with you I can do it again and it's not fair" she admitted with a shake of her head. "You did not..I wanted to have some fun and...we where drinking and ...she bit her lip You're all handsome so it happened" she looked around a moment "oh you doo?" she asked rasing a brow

Toby twisted his mouth slightly to the side in deep thought. He supposed everything she was saying was making sense, he just didn't like the idea that he'd been the one to possibly contradict her happiness. "Well, it's completely up to you, it's not my business," he smiled softly. "I really think it probably had more with the drink than anything else but you're very kind," he laughed. "Yep... I do. ...Do you?"

Melissa smiled at him for a moment, it happened they both ended up wanting it and the over drinking made it happen. She closed her eyes a moment. "Mostly" she said she did remember a lot of it "My flight is tomorrow early so you need to make sure I see everything I can today okay"? she just changed the subject for now. No need to make it weird by thinking about it.

[doubledaffy]

January, 2017. Daisy and I went to Japan to visit Kevin and Shoko. I wrote a lot about it and made this little video. XO.

1-5-17 Thursday

Kyushu island

Hippo Bakery

Beach walk. Bread. Blendy Stick. Laundry mat. Itoshima - wife and husband. I forgot my back pack on the beach it so happens. Moto guys. Daisy thought Japanese surfers were big water turkeys. Ancient pine forest. Karatsu burger. I hated. Aka egg and cheese. Kagamiyama mountain. Body move move. Karatsu castle. Ripped the cube into traffic towards Akasaka station to meet Tsuyoshi. (We got the laundry while I sat in the car). AirBnB guy. Boom box grocery store. Dars. Wasabi potato sticks. Crying toddler. Google translate sucks. Shoko made hot pot meal. Nummy. Kevin whipped his chocolate pops.

Fun fact. The man who invented Tenga, has the Guinness world record for longest JO. How fitting.

Gross airbnb hair on comforter and towel. Do not want to stay there. Wasting more money. :(

1-6-17 Friday

Big dry heave last night. Woke up at 1am thinking "oh boy, something's going on. Whoops!" Ran to the bathroom, felt the heat rise up my body. Was it the broth? The chicken? The Sake? I placed my hands upon the electronically heated seat of the Japanese washlet and began to dry heave. No barf. I felt like Barfing. But nope. My body wouldn't let me. I felt better though and went back to bed. Daisy told me in the AM that they made the HotPot with pork broth, thought of me, and then decided not to tell me. Maybe it was that. Who cares. I feel better today. Kev made Spanish French toast (torijas) for us. It was lovely. Daisy said the shower she took was the best she's ever taken. That's because there's a huge window looking out in the the sea. It's magic. Daisy and went to 7-11. Big presence here. Kev fully loves it. Apparently they make great stuff and the ATM is reliable. Located right next to the "Titty mags" as Kev explained. I took out Shoko's penny board and we stopped at HIPPO tiny surf bakery and got some snacks for the house. No salty bread. We showed up too late. I left the penny board outside and no one stole it! --- Shoko drove us to a special lunch and snack spot. Snack spot was very Japanese and cute and had weird dessert stuff. Lunch spot was closed at 3pm! Great shoe horn though. I Bought the best spoon ever. White metal. Feels like stone. Expensive ceramic gift shops. Hotto motto dance and curb eat. Sake factory great traditional architecture. Drove to muji and inkcube in the mall. Went nuts at Muji. And stuff. Daisy neck hurt. Back home. Cream soup. Organize pack. Test journals and pens out. Daisy in bed by 9. I stay up and eat cream soup and some dars. White chocolate. Do some photos and stuff. Kev teaches himself Japanese on laptop then plays StarDewValley.

1-7-17 Saturday

Woke up early. Beach walk. Big shell find. Hippo. Too early for SheoPan! 9:30 is the best time. Come back. Blendy stick with Scones and Cream Soup left over. Computer time clicky and and work / taxes shit. Shower ocean view. Skate to Hippo at 9:30. got the SheoPan. Groin pull fall on the way back. Saw Osky and the Corgy photo shoot. Kev takes us to train. I dropped 40 on the train card by mistake. Taking photos on the train is illegal, Kevin explains. Photo sound on iPhone mandatory. Unpack at AirBnb. Then Bounce to Lunch at crazy under ground mall. Green noodle soup. So many people. So many things. So many structures. So much lighting. So much movement. No white people. Babies dressing nicely. Cool gear. Women in mens wool long straight overcoats. Tan and black. Big buttons and ties. Underground mall culture. Walk tour through FuK with Kev. Side of building greenery stair case hike to views. Photo shoot women and man.  Stop at Julette’s letters. Got a CLIP and stuff. Wooden baby toys nice. Japanese Love Pop and cool pencil, etc. Walk to DONUT spot. Lots of walking. Donut spot in crazy OTHER mall under ground. Madness. Hot down there. Amazing donuts. Weird that in a mall though, but maybe that’s great. Mall Mall Mall. Energy to go to MUJI. Big walk again. Lots of stores and big streets. Mega complex. Water light projector show. Muju is calming. Hot in there. Got more shit. Wanted everything and a new house to decorate. Book for Ben. Meet up with Shoko at Hippo and crazy recycling bear. Walk to restaurant called CHIKEN. Allow smoking, but place is cool and hip and nice. Light beer life. Moscow mule. Was off, from walking and hunger. Kev big adventurous eater. Raw Chicken - SASHIMI. Crazy. Got a little buzzed and let go. Crazy smokey chicken dish. Tasty food overall. Walk back in the Rain. LAWSON Dars and purple gummy candy and Crunky! Shoko peeled off before the AirBnB after party. Incense at the Airbnb made it smell better. Muji lights. 1/4 xanax or whatever to sleep. Pushed beds together with D and passed out.

1-8-17 Sunday

Woke up. Jon Bellion hate listen. Shower in tiny shower. Trying to meet with Kev at Eggs and Things. Big American style food. Just love the American food. Not so much THAT< I love knowing what I’m eating because I have a special little diet that doesn’t really include meat or fish or pork or anything, and here in Japan that’s hard. Kev showed up. After Eats and Things we popped on the train(s) to Dazaifu - a very old (16th century) Shrine (or could be a temple, hard to remember which is which) about 1hr on the localish trains. People on the trains sleep a lot. It’s nice. Also, no one is loud. Very quiet and respectful. Trains are on time and the stations are clean. One train we took was just the loveliest color scheme - light green/blue and red. V. calming. Tons of people in the terminals at times. Felt like Grand Central Terminal. If I ever felt like wanting to go to a Bigger Japanese city, nope - this amount of people is fine. Dazaifu is amazing. Tiny village full of a billion people swarming up to see the shrine, but it was oddly peaceful because no one is rude and it’s generally quiet. Tiny shops and people cooking meat sticks and shit on the sides on the way up. At the end, before the gate, there was a naturally formed single file line just to take a pic with the whacky animal statue. Formed by the people in a simple organized way. Not like the monster americans at Disney. Just a nice simple civilized line. Inside, we had to do a special hand and mouth wash routine to cleanse ourselves a the water zone. I touched my lips to the water bucket stick because it’s hard to know the customs in other countries. A million Japanese people cycling through there each day, and Jeff touches his lips to the community water bucket. We hiked up into the woods and saw an amusement park on the other side which seemed weird being so close to a shine or whatever. We got soft meatless sweet pucks and sat at a low table. Very relaxing stroll. Felt bad that Kev was in the Glum zone not knowing if his relationship is in the pits. Train back Komono woman sleeping among all the other sleeping Japanese people. Kev bounced, had to work and wanted to be home for the night. We wish we could all just stay at the house. Going back to the AirBnB and not having family dinner with the homie was bumming us out. I was excited to take the reins and figure out where to go in the new city. Apple Maps is great for walking directions on this trip. Great UI. Google Maps looks like garbage. Daisy found a place that has burgers and veggy options called Brooklyn Parlor. No shame in just going to a cool hip place that I know I can get something I like. The thing is, the Japanese food I have eaten is amazing. But when you’re without your Japanese speaking friends, it’s very hard to make sure you aren’t eating shell fish or meat. We saw some other cool small restaurants we’d thought looked nice on the walk. 7-11 stop after dinner to get snacks. The Titty Rags had censorship thingies on the genitals and they also had tape on the pages so you couldn’t open em. Old man barfing at the bus stop, but overall we’re getting a friendly vibe from the city. Plans to watch Finding Dori on the lappy, but might just crash. Trying to plan what to do tomorrow with the rental car with Kev. Hard to plan sometimes! We’re living out of a backpack now because of the AirBnB and would like to re-up / swap out our gear.

(First horn sound we’ve heard here. Wow. Just now as I was typing this entry, just goes to show you, why honk, when you can be patient and kind?)  

1-9-17 Monday

Giants

Eggs and things iced coffee?

Train to Kevin's

Rental car madness - couldn’t find Nissan. Goosechase.

Senyoji temple - Magic. Soft. Quiet. Milltion Monks on hill. Old artifacts. Incense. Chanting on Mic.

Everyone backs their car in to the parking spot.

Ichiran Noodle Factory - ticket system. Rice and Egg and cold Mushrooms. Put the plate on the sound thingy and it makes a big sound all across the restaurant signifying that you want your next little order.

Tea Garden Madness - Light up trees across this huge empty yard with pop music blasting from a ton of speakers hidden all over the grounds. I did a BodyMoveMove, naturally.

1-10-17 Tuesday

Tried to go to Hippo today. It’s hard to go there, apparently. Closed on Tuesdays. Whoops! Came back with no pastries, so Kevy Cab hooked up the Pancakes and I took care of the Blendy Sticks. Grabbed the laundry and popped out to the long driving day through windy roads in the beautiful Japanese country side. First we stopped at the big Caldera overlook where a volcano made a blast hole a very long time ago. Then we popped down more windy roads to see the Aso Volcano. It was cloudy, but you could see a massive mountain with a big hole in it smoking underneath sets of ominous clouds. The museum center looked like something out of a Russian Post Apocalypse B movie. Drove to the wrong hot springs, I was getting car sick, so moved up front. The steering wheel is on the right side here, so sitting up front is a treat cuz you feel like you’re just controlling the car with you mind. Finally made it to the real hot springs. It’s a 24hr spot and it’s magical. You pick your favorite little hot spring house for around 1500 Yen (15 bucks). Then you pop in there, shower off, put your coins in the slot thingy that makes hot water blast out of a long tube into a beautiful wooden tub. We would have splurged for the rock tub for an extra dollar. Yup, a dollar for the upgrade. Daisy and I never felt so relaxed. I bought some sheepy slippers at the gift shop and am wearing them now. I also bought a sprite type drink that was about 1/4 size of a glass coke bottle, with a label designed to win design awards. Shoko is now getting car sick, so it’s me and her up front, with her driving. She drives very fast. On the highway she was passing mother fuckers with ease. I was nervous. Grabbed our laundry from the trusty laundry mat (drying only for us). I lay down on the bench while Daisy read Japanese Nylon. I was trying to still my body. Bopped over to the UDON noodle place and got some Tofu Noodle Udon and white rice. It was simply great. Ate at the counter and took some iPhone vids of stuff. At home raging on some 7-11 snacks we got at some point today. 7-11 here is what I want a convenience store to be. It has lots of shit I like and cheap. Daisy in bed now cuz I feel I owe it to myself to document these trips. They’re super important to me and special and I’m lucky to go on them.

1-11-17 Wednesday

Woke up at 8am and popped out to the ocean magic tree zone to dance in public for my BodyMoveMove & Exquisitemovement project. Dancing really gets the heart pumping. Daisy said she wanted to go for a run on the beach but where is she now? Face down in bed, that’s where. I can’t seem to sleep past 8 and I’m loving it. Slid over to Hippo for a pastry run. Scored that ShioPan which is very rare and special, as we all know. Came back and missed the “let’s go” and rushed to get ready. Everyone was making fun of me for being a space cadet on this trip, but I kinda like being loose and spacey when I’m not at the wheel. Most of my life is dictated by me and only me so it’s been really nice that Kev and Shoko are handling everything and being great tour guides. We zap over to Shoko’s parent’s house which is a traditional Japanese magical tiny compound. Garden’s and outbuildings and paths tucked and squeezed into the tiny suburban hillside. They have another house that they open as a cafe and art gallery and everything is as you’d expect a modern day / ancient Japanese house to be. They have a fucking COY POND in the middle of it all with lots of buddies swimming back and forth. Their toilet has a button that lifts and lowers the seat - no touch lifestyle. That sums up the house and how rad it is. We jammed over to a fast food Sushi Roll place that uses a conveyer belt system to deliver your food and you pay per plate. You order on the touch screen and it makes a lot of loud chimes and screams at you, which is the only downside. All this annoyance is overruled by the convenience and novelty. I ate no fish because fish grosses me out and I feel bad for them. They say fish is good for you, but not for me because it’s disgusting and smells like low tide. Your kid isn’t dressed up like he/she is headed to fashion week? Don’t bring them outside then. That’s the rule. Tolls here are very expensive, but the roads, even though I can’t read a god damn word, seem to be great and tight and efficient and clean. Next, we bopped over to the largest bronze Buddah that is laying down. It’s magnificent and peaceful. Snagged a Bodymovemove before going inside and praying at all the little pray stations. Then we got little balls with feathers on them to toss into the tiny buckets but none of us were successful. Guess what? This place is manicured to perfection and has a very hand made feel. Lots of paths into the forest and mini shrines and stuff. Even a tiny Torii Gate you can crawl through. Whoops, sun is setting, so we blast off to another Temple Shrine they’re calling Hay something. It has a lot of stairs and you can see the ocean and whatever. Big hay knot thingy you can pray to. We got gas and stopped at Aeon for food and snacks for gifts. The Nissan March really gets good gas mileage. I can’t find my lens cap, but who cares, I already got the good Bokeh shot on the highway. We’ve been using a “Shared Wallet” System, which is neat. You all put in the same amount of $ at the beginning and when you do group activities you all take out of that. At the end if there’s any left, you split it up. It works well or whatever. Back home Shoko made hot pot - no pork so I don’t need to dry heave over the wash-let again! Beers for everyone but me and desserts and funny convo on the futon and stuff. I took a bath listening to the ocean waves pulse. So nice. That pulsing really does wash away everything bad.

(so that’s it for what I have written. I know we stayed in Japan longer, maybe I wrote the rest of my thoughts in an actual journal? Hard to care to search for it right now. Maybe the video above will do the trick closing that gap. I’m updating this blog right now and it’s 5/11/19 10:07AM)

[alchemicalcoffins]

5am just woke up from this dream.

I met up with this witch doctor friend. His spirit form came out. He said we were going to go and do this test. We met on a lilypad on a lake, he asked me if he could show me his spider. I allowed. A stream of water rose up from the centre of the lake and it carried my spirit and his up into the heavens. I was terrified, I looked down and saw my family. I knew I was going somewhere far, and somehow I had know this place before.

On the way I finally get to touch this girl for real,it’s a brief moment and i arrive in this dark scene.

There is a Japanese woman. She seems to know what she is doing and is going somewhere. I trust her, I doubt her capabilities and I know I’m stronger out of me and her… And it’s just us. She walks up to a gate, opens it, and mumbled something quickly about knowing about the lions, she got into her car and it turns out she had her whole family there. Then she left.

She opened a gate to the lions. The first were cubs. I immediately had to jump into the trees, using extreme core strength to meld myself against the branches to avoid his playful curious nature seeking me out. His indirection makes him difficult to judge his willingness to kill. I got to the top of the tree, and there were dozens of cubs at the top. So pointless of me. I dived out of the trees onto a nearby giraffe. I apologised and asked him first to hold his head, I asked him if it was ok because it may hurt him. He laughed and was so jolly I asked him how he felt. I climbed on and I rode him around in warmth and love. I had never felt such love, saftey… Warmth.

Next I am back in the scene, somewhere at the back of this jaradsic like park. The Asian lady is back. With her husband. They live here? They seem to know what’s going on. They are hurried about, and start to run off like as per usual. Knowing about me and almost laughing. They know something dreadfully huge is coming.

It is a lion. It goes after some other figure and I hide in some darker, thicker, trees. I have no chance as he is enormous. His muscle.. visceral strength… Otherworldly. He must have been more than quadruple my size. He spots me and he comes right up to my face. He stares into my eyes for a moment and I release my terror and be vulnerable​ to him. He laughs, he shows me how he feels the same. Immense pleasure this time, oh my! He said, brothers from the beginning. I was so warm, but had to then tell him, I started shaking and crying, I was so sorry, but I was so scared of his physicality. Why could it be so? He said, he cannot change it and this it is also his burden. I felt his struggle with that, and knew that he was in no better position.

I call upon the lion to work. I bring him to my boss. The lion collects himself and simply gives him $100 out of pity for his egoistic character. Next scene starts to come back into my body and life. I was wired out at work. I was setting up the new lighting system but I felt not good at it. Other men were better. Next I find my old room is set up as a hazard no enter zone. The police are trying to find me. I don’t want to go inside. I see the life of drug use, I see how it all works. I see the police stab an innocent man. I see insecurity. I don’t trust any of it. I never want to go back inside my old room. I find a projector and some girls think they see a wall is false, it is projected by the police. They find out it is true,, I laugh and I they are happy and intrigued and aren’t sure what’s going on I but are like a crime scene dextives and will figure it out . I feel it is the to enter my old abandoned room. Its cagey, but it’s where I have to live. The dream ends. I wake up back in my body and feel the same as walking into the room.