#my husband always says I'm not but. 😬

[running-in-the-dark]

.

[simp-ly-writes]

The Comment's Section (pt.10)

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Pairing: Spencer Agnew x gn!Reader

─ · · SUMMARY: an epilogue (no spoilers here!).

─ · · TAGS: gender-neutral pronouns, slowburn, fluff, light angst, cheesiness, friends that act like lovers, friends to lovers, mutual pining, attempt at humour, social media au, officially lovers.

─ · · MASTERLIST | TAGLIST REQUEST | PART SEVEN | PART EIGHT

─ · · A/N: my last smosh fic! thank you all seriously for all the support. I wouldn't have written as much as I did for the fandom without the comments, reblogs and tags I have had the pleasure of receiving. I may come back once I get through the creative burnout i'm feeling for smosh but who knows! Anways-uh... enjoy!

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A few years later...

🔔 (name)s_username just posted for the first time in awhile, check it out!

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Liked by phatchance, spennser, glen_powell, and others

(name)s_username Never really been much of a secret just how much I love my best friend that I can now, officially, call my husband 🫶

Thank you, Spencer, for dealing with my bullshit, for calling me out, letting me cry on your shoulder, yell in your face, eat everything in your fridge and yet still find ways to love me, all of me, and never make me question it for a moment. Thank you, my love, for showing me what love can feel like, what it can look like, and how it can be practiced.

It does not feel like twenty years have gone by but then again, I see you everyday and now I get that with the promise of forever. I love you and that is something I will never take for granted.

*No pictures from the wedding, sorry everyone but I'm keeping those for myself, friends, and family :-) Have roadtrip pictures instead!

View all 11,301 comments

spennser gosh, I didn't know we were hard-launching already?!

↳ (name)s_username babe, we did that nearly five years ago... 😬

username01 I will NEVER get over these two! 😭 I want a love like this! Its been so incredibly beautiful and fulfilling watching you two interact on screen together, congratulations! You both deserve nothing but happiness! #(yourshipname)isforever

username31 why is nobody else commenting about that last picture 🤣

co_mill you have me inspired to re-new my vows! Gosh, I remember meeting you both for the first time and seeing that initial re-spark and to see it, to celebrate it now, gosh-bestie you have my crying. I'm so happy for you both 🫶 #(yourshipname)isforever

↳ (name)s_username you have me sobbing now too! and I told myself I wouldn't cry anymore today! 😭 thank you for always believing in us (even when we didn't lol) ↳ co_mill of course! some people are just meant to be, just at a different time. ❤️❤️ ↳ (name)s_username couldn't have said it better myself ❤️❤️ ↳ username24 okay but why is this thread the most wholesome thing on the interweb??? ↳ username00 who tf says "interweb?"

username69 still don't understand why anyone would care about such a terrible person like yourself. The biggest liar is here and everyone knows it- you lie to yourself too.

username31 congratulations!!! 🎉

username12 OMG THEY GOT MARRIED????? 🥳 YESSSS #(yourshipname)isforever

shayne_topp woah! you got married? OMG I did that too!

↳ (name)s_username oh shit really? I'm still trying to figure out if I like this whole marriage thing or not... /sarcasm ↳ shayne_topp ehhh, I mean, I don't know about you but I have a pretty killer marriage. You and Spencer can try... ↳ (name)s_username SPENCER!! 👺 ↳ spennser yes, love? ❤️ ↳ (name)s_username do we have a better marriage than shourtney? 🥹 ↳ spennser I-uh... 😬 ↳ anthony_padilla (psst, just say yes!) ↳ spennser yes! 😄 ↳ (name)s_username see shanye! take that! 😄 ↳ username88 "yes, love" AHHHHHHHHHHH 💞

username33 #(yourshipname)isforever #(yourshipname)isforever #(yourshipname)isforever #(yourshipname)isforever

username29 YESSS LET"S GOOOOO BOYSSSSS!!!!!!

filmingamanda does this mean I can't make anymore "spencer is attractive jokes, now?"

↳ (name)s_username I mean... you're not wrong so I won't stop you 😉

username90 this all feels surreal... but congrats!! 👏

ianhecox proud of you both, truly ❤️

chickenshopdate and here goes another ex of mine getting married. WHEN WILL IT BE MY TIME GOD??? PLEASEEE

phatchance you both looked so beautiful today 🫶

tomeybones wishing you both years of happiness to come!!

username12 I hate you, so much now.

─────── · ·

🔔 spennser just posted for the first time in awhile, check it out!

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Liked by (name)s_username, filmingamanda, and others

spennser today and everyday from now, I get the pleasure of waking up in my spouses arms. if you would have asked me in college that I would be dating a movie star, comedian, writer, and director as talented, smart, and gorgeous as (name); I would have, quite frankly, told you to shut up and fuck off.

Funny how things change, huh? I now cannot think of a singular day without you in it and cannot remember a day without you in my life. I am so incredibly thankful that you fell in love with me, trusted me with your heart up until now and for forever.

You will always have my love and support. My arms to welcome you back home and I will make sure you never question how much I love you, my love and show you everyday just how much you mean to me.

*No pictures from the wedding! Keeping that private, please do not go looking for pictures.

View all 4,220 comments

(name)s_username I love you, so much. 🫶

↳ spennser I love you. 🫶

username01 AHHHHH. 😭 No but like- AHHHHH you GUYsss are killing me here. After years of waiting im now dying here. My heart cannot take this level of sweetness 🫶 #(yourshipname)isforever

smosh #(yourshipname)isforever

smoshgames #(yourshipname)isforever

smoshpit #(yourshipname)isforever

↳ username99 not all the smosh channels coming together LMAO 😂

username24 "So this is love, mhmm, mhmm, so this is what makes like divine~" - (name) x Spencer

username68 babe, wake up! (name) and Spencer actually got married! #(yourshipname)isforever

damienhass you guys are so stinkin' cute 😊

username77 eh. I bet it'll last a year or two before Spencer gets sick of em.

anthonypadilla with everyone getting married im beginning to feel left out...

↳ ianhecox I mean... we could always get married?

username33 I love that this whole post is about Spence being both genuinely so happy the get to call (name) there's but also wondering how on earth he managed to get with (name) too XD

username90 wishing the couple nothing but happiness and respect 🫡

─────── · ·

─ · · A/N: and holy shit! the comments section is finally over! thank you all again for reading this far, I hope you all have enjoyed reading this series as much as I did writing it. 🫶 - I will always think about this lol

─ · · SPENCER AGNEW TAGLIST: @lisiliely @missflufffanfics @little-stitious-studios @thejourneyneverendsx @sibsteria @lizzylynch1 @babble2 @delaneyburghardt @thevintagefangirl @uniquely-haunting @maricarorp @sarahskywalker-amidala @laurasdrey

[kathlare]

crossed paths

Lando Norris x Amelie Dayman

Summary: Amelie’s unexpected visit to the British Grand Prix stirs a mix of emotions as she reconnects with familiar faces from Lando's family.

Wordcount: 1.0 k

Warnings: fluff, smau

full masterlist // request over here!

July 9th, 2024 - Northamptonshire, United Kingdom

liked by amelieupdate, ln4nation, and others

amelieupdates: Spotted at the Silverstone paddock? 🤔 Could it be Amelie arriving at the British GP? 👀💚

View all 898 comments

f1fanatic99: Is that Amelie arriving or am I seeing things? 🤔 → amelieforever21: @f1fanatic99 honestly, I can't tell but I hope it's her!! We need more of her in F1 💚👀

lando_shippers: WHERE'S LANDO???? WE NEED A REUNION, WE MISS THE VIBES 😭 → amelieadmirer03: @lando_shippers honestly same, their friendship was goals! Bring them back together already!! 😭💥

checosupporter10: Let's gooo, Amelie always showing love for Checo 🙌💚

notameliestalker: I swear, that’s NOT her, just some look-alike 😂 → ameliefan99: @notameliestalker I lowkey thought that too but I’m hoping it’s her! Manifesting it 💫

racefanatic47: Paddock vibes with Amelie > paddock vibes without her 🤧

landoandamelie4ever: OKAY BUT AMELIE AND LANDO NEED TO REUNITE, WE'RE BEGGING!! 🥺💔 → amelieobsessed17: @landoandamelie4ever Imagine the energy if they ever hang out again... we need it for our souls 🙌💫

amelie_is_my_queen: That is Amelie, I can feel it in my bones 🫣✨ → f1fanaticxx: @amelie_is_my_queen SAME, my heart skipped a beat 🤭

f1fanatic23: Why is Amelie even here? Just let her stay out of the paddock 😬

lando4life: Ugh, I miss when Lando and Amelie were friends. Now he's with Magui and it’s just awkward 🥴 → f1queenfan: @lando4life Yikes, can they just stop with the Magui drama and bring back Lando & Amelie vibes? I miss them together 😩

amelie_stan07: Can we please stop shipping them together? They were friends, that's it. 😑 → f1fanatic99: @amelie_stan07 Sorry, but I think they were lowkey cute together... I'm just saying 👀💘

--------------

The paddock at the British Grand Prix buzzed with the usual excitement—photographers darting between team garages, fans craning for glimpses of their favorite drivers, and the scent of freshly brewed coffee wafting through the summer air. Amelie adjusted her sunglasses as she navigated the crowd, her sleek blonde hair catching the sunlight.

She wasn’t here for the spotlight, though. She was here for her sister Stella, who had invited her to support Checo, her husband and Red Bull’s driver. It wasn’t unusual for Amelie to visit the paddock, but it had been a while, where she’d avoided certain awkward encounters with laser-focused determination. Today, she planned to stick to her sister’s side and keep things simple.

But fate, as always, had other plans.

Amelie spotted the small coffee stand near the media center and decided to grab an iced coffee before heading back to the Red Bull garage. As she waited for her order, the sound of a familiar laugh made her stomach drop. She turned, her heart skipping a beat when she saw them—Cisca Norris, Lando’s mum, standing with her youngest daughter, Flo, and his grandparents.

For a moment, Amelie considered pretending she hadn’t seen them. But Cisca’s gaze caught hers, recognition lighting up her face. Without thinking, Amelie smiled and gave them a polite wave. To her surprise—and mild anxiety—they all waved back enthusiastically, as if they hadn’t just been acquaintances but old friends reunited.

—Amelie!— Cisca called, her voice warm and inviting.

There was no avoiding it now. Steeling herself, Amelie walked over, her iced coffee in hand. She wasn’t sure if it was the summer heat or her nerves, but she could feel her cheeks flush as she approached.

—Hello— she greeted with a smile, nodding at Lando’s grandparents before turning to Cisca and Flo. —It’s been a while.—

Cisca beamed, clearly delighted to see her. —It really has. You look wonderful, Amelie.—

—Thank you. So do all of you,— she replied, her voice calm despite the slight tremor in her chest.

Cisca’s mum, Lando’s grandmother, stepped forward, her eyes sparkling as she took in Amelie’s appearance. —My goodness, look at you! Blonde again, it suits you so well. And doesn’t she look older, Cisca? More grown-up.—

Amelie laughed softly, brushing a strand of hair behind her ear. —I guess a few years and a lot of work will do that to you.—

Before anyone could respond, another figure joined the group. Magui, dressed in a tight black dress and oversized sunglasses, sauntered over. She slipped an arm around Cisca’s and smiled, but the gesture didn’t reach her eyes.

—And who’s this?— Magui asked, her voice sugary sweet but tinged with a sharpness that didn’t go unnoticed.

Cisca hesitated for the briefest moment before introducing them. —Magui, this is Amelie. She’s an old friend of ours. Amelie, this is Magui.—

Amelie extended a hand, her polite smile unwavering. —Nice to meet you.—

—Likewise,— Magui said, shaking her hand briefly. The tension was palpable, though neither woman let it show.

As they exchanged pleasantries, Amelie couldn’t help but notice the way Cisca and her parents subtly shifted their attention back to her, as if Magui’s presence was an afterthought. Even Flo, who was usually shy, stayed close to Amelie, her little face lighting up when Amelie complimented her new braided hairstyle.

Magui, however, stood off to the side, her expression tightening as she watched how warmly the Norris family interacted with Amelie. The stark difference in their treatment of the two women was impossible to ignore, and the realization made jealousy bubble under her carefully maintained façade.

Lando’s grandmother, oblivious to the undercurrents, spoke up again. —You know, Amelie, we were just talking about you recently. I told Cisca how much we missed having you around. It’s not the same without you. And Lando…— She paused, her expression softening. —He was so happy when you were around. I’ve never seen him look at anyone the way he looked at you.—

Cisca winced slightly, her eyes darting to Magui, who was now visibly uncomfortable. Amelie, for her part, maintained her composure, though her heart ached at the unexpected comment.

—That’s very kind of you to say,— she managed, her voice steady.

Sensing the awkwardness, Cisca stepped in. —Mum, maybe we should let Amelie get back to her sister. I’m sure she’s busy.—

Amelie nodded, grateful for the out. —Yes, I should head back to the garage. It was lovely seeing all of you again.—

Cisca’s grandmother reached out and gave Amelie’s hand a gentle squeeze before she could leave. —You take care of yourself, dear. And don’t be a stranger. You’ll always have a place with us.—

Amelie nodded, her smile softening as her heart swelled with bittersweet warmth. —Thank you. That means a lot to me.— Her gaze flicked to Flo, who was still holding onto her sleeve. —Flo, keep being this amazing, okay? And let your brother know I said hello.—

At that, Flo’s eyes lit up with excitement, but before she could respond, Magui cut in with a strained smile. —I’m sure Lando’s a bit preoccupied, but I’ll pass along the message if we see him before you do.—

Amelie’s polite mask stayed intact, though she could sense the slight barb in Magui’s tone. Cisca’s lips pressed together tightly, her disapproval barely masked, while Lando’s grandmother looked as though she were about to scold someone. To diffuse the tension, Amelie chuckled lightly. —I wouldn’t expect anything less. Racing keeps everyone on their toes.—

With a final polite goodbye, Amelie turned to leave, her steps calm and measured despite the swirl of emotions rising in her chest. She could feel the weight of their gazes, the warmth of Cisca and his grandparents, the jealousy simmering in Magui’s expression. And as she walked away, she couldn’t help but wonder how things had come to this—how the comfort of her past with Lando’s family could still feel so welcoming, yet so far out of reach.

[jeonscatalyst]

Hi,

English is not my first language and I can never construct my words the way I want to or ever really stay on topic (my thoughts wander a lot) so please ignore any weirdness in this ask😬

I just wanted to say I've been thinking a lot about what has been transpiring these past few days, and I think I've finally, truly come to understand the phrase "misery loves company."

I'm not on Twitter but I can imagine that immediately after that last episode of Are You Sure, Taekookers as well as other shippers got to the usual work of twisting things and moments just to soothe their own burn & bring Jikookers down a peg from their high.

I've noticed this thing where every time Jikook have Jikooked and Jikookers celebrate it, bask in their joy, interact happily with each other, and don't talk about other shippers or bring the negativity of "what the cult is saying", and their spaces is just so jolly, clean and healthy or whatever, no toxicity whatsover.. Taekookers and others take it upon themselves to infiltrate the space and bring their misery and bitterness and what's frustrating is that they actually 100% succeed all the time. Blogs here may not show it but I swear every time the tag as just like TWO negative asks (not asks from Jikookers genuinely doubting but the usual blatantly disrespectful & distasteful asks that minimize Jimin and Jungkook's friendship or make it seem like Jungkook would choose Taehyung or anyone else over Jimin) the mood dampens significantly.

It's an energy I can literally feel (sounds cringe, I know, but it's something I've always had) the same way just spending an hour in Taekook spaces makes it clear that they have this weird combination of being somewhat secure that their ship is real & being hidden by Jikook but also being so fearful of the thought of Jimin next to Jungkook & not trusting Jungkook to act like a loyal, faithful husband towards Taehyung where Jimin is concerned. And this does not come from their words, it's just something that's there. It's as if they are sitting in anxiety just waiting for the moment JK reaches over and kisses Jimin full on the mouth, and they are dreading (and by the way, they and other shippers see moments between Jikook as romantic or at least unusual for simple friends to do, even more than Jikookers. I've seen Jikookers say it's a bromance, they act friendly because they are friends first and foremost, while the other sides cry fanservice and make entire analyses about how Bighit would have never shown AYS or any of the past moments between those two if Jikook were a real couple👀)

JIMIN more than Taekook has infested himself in the deepest parts of their minds, like a terrible disease. They even fear him for things independent from their ship; like his greatness as an individual and artist. What makes Taekookers so unique from others is that they do not only move like toxic shippers but toxic solos as well. They bash Jimin outside of things that have to do with Taekook. His artistry, his personality, his relationship with his loved ones and others closest to him. I've never seen anything like it.

Similarly, I feel a majority of Jikookers let Taekookers get inside their heads, when there's really no reason for them to, in my opinion. Jikookers would see a moment between Jikook and take it for what it is.. until a Taekooker comes to twist it; and no matter how absolutely delusional it sounds, it'll take root inside Jikookers' heads and do its work. That's the feeling I get being here for almost two years now.

Anyway, I've been seeing the mini back and forth between Jikookers and some Yoonmin-something blogger and it's been really interesting to him. It's really like clockwork that every time Jikookers are happy about moments from their ship and not bothering anyone, there will come someone from the other side trying to poke and start something, and unfortunately, they succeed every single time.

And it's not only that blogger but I've seen several from different platforms just clearly trying to start a fight (and by "starting a fight" I don't mean having a different opinion about the boys' relationships and shipping a different pair, but deliberately undermining Jikook even as a friendship & subtly suggesting that they have poor character & are extremely ambitious) and when Jikookers rightfully respond (although I really think y'all shouldn't but we do what we want) they turn things around & make it look like Jikookers are the toxic ones and then boast "lol they are so mad, oh the cognitive dissonance, they are crying because there are people who don't believe what they believe" because they somehow think they got their lick back simply because Jimin & JK did whatever they did and those who love their bond had the audacity to hype it up and believe whatever it is that they want to believe about it.

(Also saying all those things about cognitive dissonance & making it seem like "Jokers are mad for no reason" when it's extremely clear that you wrote that post to soothe your own cognitive dissonance and bring Jikookers down to your miserably emotional level, is wild. It's a diabolical tactic)

I've noticed that other shippers literally hate Jikookers for believing in a "company sold ship" and this behavior is basically them punishing you for it. They are projecting their own toxicity onto Jikookers by saying Jikookers are toxic when all Jikookers have ever done is retaliate.

"Other shippers get along well, but it's always Jikookers the problem". I think that's something they said in their post but I'm obvious paraphrasing. That part honestly made me smirk because anyone who truly tries to quiet the bias inside their minds and looks at the different shipping subsections of the fandom, what they say & how they say it, and how they interact with one another, they'd quickly realize that Jikookers are not the problem, and they'd know exactly which shippers are the problem.

"We other shippers get along well together" - Yeah, and we know exactly WHY you get along "so well". It's not rocket science, and it's certainly not because you're all so unproblematic lol. Also it's wild AF for Yoonminers to be in solidarity with Taekookers when Taekookers have dedicated their entire existence to hating Jimin and spewing the most vile things about him just because. But he's one half of the ship they supposedly love so much?? Sure.

Like please find shame. Locate it somewhere🤦‍♀️ because wow.

I wanted to say more but I forgot what and this already so unneccesarily long, but yeah, misery really loves company.

Hi anon!

First of all, there is absolutely nothing wrong with English, hell, you phrased your words and sentences better than I would have (English isn’t my first language either) so don’t worry at all.

I could literally kiss you right now because you have said everything and more. Taekookers have been losing it all day, since they heard Jimin say he was at Jk’s place the night before their Jeju trip and I think it stings more for them because a few hours before we got the clips, they were already talking about the possibility that taekook travelled to Jeju together without Jimin and some of them were already getting ready with their mocking boots on to start asking questions like “why did he choose to travel with this person and not his “boyfriend” "but they were shut up real quick and now they are spiraling. I’ve seen even some of the more “level headed” taekook blogs on here losing their shit today and trying to cope with the information we just got by clinging to Jimin and Jungkook saying they didn’t see much of each other before and all I could do was chuckle because nothing screams more pained than that.

Like you said, Misery loves company and right now they know jokers are on cloud 9 so seeing as they can’t be on cloud 9 as well, they try to drag us down with them and I just pity the jokers who let the cult get into their heads because how much more obvious can it be that they are bothered by Jikook? As you said, it seems like a good chunk of them do really believe that taekook is real but they still can’t shake off this feeling or fear that Jk could still do stuff with Jimin and that is why you see them jubilating every time they think Jk has acted in a typical “bro” or “friend” way with Jimin but they are back to their panic the moment they see Jk behave in a “soft” or “lovers coded” way with Jimin. They are constantly in a state of panic and confusion because one moment they see something that they believe convinces them that there is no way Jikook are a couple but then they turn around and see something else that goes against that belief so no matter how hard they try, they just can’t get Jimin off their minds. He is like that thing that constantly threatens their beliefs and they hate him for him it.

If you visit the taekook tag today, you will see all of them grasping at the tinest straws trying to make themselves feel better and one thing I noticed about taekookers on tumblr which is very different from jikookers is that, taekook blogs on tumblr get some of their highest engagement when they drag or shit talk Jikook and taekookers would claim over and over and over again that they don’t care about jokers but they never get tired of talking about jokers and jikook. Don’t believe me, go search any taekook blog and see how much more engagement they get when they talk shit abt Jikook and jikookers vs when they actually talk about their own ship. The difference is astounding while in jikook spaces or just as a blog owner myself, I notice that while jokers enjoy the occasional taekooker drag, they don’t like going on and on talking about taekook or taekookers. I delete asks I get from people responding to asks from taekookers because after talking about the cult in two or 3 post, I start seeing jikookers clearly not being interested to talk about them and asking for us to move on to topics that concern Jikook. I also get some of the lowest engagements when I talk about the cult while I get my highest engagements when we talk about Jikook being cute and in love. So while jikookers don’t care to go on talking about the cult, the cult’s favourite topic is jokers and jikook.

As for yoonminers, they are a lost cause to me. I have never ever cared about the fact that they think Yoonmin is real because anyone can think whatever they want but what I cannot stand about them is the fact that they are supposedly fans of Jimin yet they have no issues holding hands with the biggest Jimin haters in the fandom. Other than this, a yoonminer to me is just like a vminer or taejiner or Jinkooker where I think the duo is adorable and beautiful together but will never take anyone who seriously thinks they are in a romantic relationship seriously.

Anyways anon, thank you so much for your ask as you really pointed out several important points when it comes to what is actually eating these people up.

[youremyheaven]

on the topic of malefics and sensuality, i'm martian and unsurprisingly celibate. but one thing that i think is unique to martian celibacy is hating men and let me tell you... i sure do 😭 i've had a few experiences as a teen that were like okay at best but as i've gotten older i find men so disgusting and stupid and quite frankly sinister that i just cannot bring myself to even flirt with them. i think there probably is a man out there who won't make me feel this way (venusian munch man if you can hear me please save me) but in the meantime me and my misandrist martian friends (i'm like a mars magnet) are gonna be locked UP

and also, i have mrigashira moon and i think that mrigashira specifically makes you fantasize about romance/sex a lot but not wanting to actually do it. my mrig rising and venus friend feels the same way! we both spent our teen years on wattpad 24/7 😭 mrigs love escapism and fantasy!

omg BBG you spilled 💅🏼

I've noticed the man hating tendency with many Martian women lmaooo, everytime I hear it, I do feel a bit shook ngl, it's like Saturn men hating women

Venusian man save me is so realllll 😩😩😭🤣

Honorable mention for Jupiter men (esp Vishaka) they're the sweetest guys except they're kinda sexless (except Vishaka) they're romantic but not sexual??? If that makes sense??

My friend dated a Vishaka Moon man for a year and he apparently never ever touched her 😭😭😭and she thought it was because he found her unappealing lmao (dating within the Indian context means a man who doesn't touch before marriage is a good man etc so she felt too "slutty" to ask him for anything bc most men are sleazy and would've tried to pull something and him not doing so meant he was a decent guy and she was the problem 💀🤡)

I'd say Venus & Jupiter men are the ones who know how to treat women right 😌😉 (obviously how evolved they're as individuals also matter, there are sex addicted Venusians and party everyday, constant thrill chasing Jupitereans)

Lmaoo the Mrigashira fantasizing about sex and never actually wanting to do the deed is so true. My 60yr old aunt (Mrigashira Moon) has been separated from her husband for like 20 years (and she's thrived as a girlboss ever since) and she often talks about finding a handsome man etc 😌😏🤤 for her company but when my dad says "okay let's try matrimonial sites and find a guy for you 😌🫶🏼" she's like "🤮🤢🤢EWWW"

A gang of Martian misandrists is so funny 😭🤣😳😶‍🌫️💀🤣😭 I feel like Martian women are so unimpressed with me bc I seem like a deranged lover girl to them lmao,, my friend in college had Mars in Mrigashira atmakaraka and she literally acted like my mom and shooed away any man who approached me (since many of them were creepy, I was grateful for it ngl) but the WAYYY she spoke about guys always felt a bit unhinged to me like ??? it can't be normal to walk around with this much rage and angst ??? And I always tried to gauge if there was something in her past that made her this way 😔😶‍🌫️😶 but girlie never dated, never had a crush, never went near a man, was never assaulted/harassed/abused by men etc so I figured it must just be a hating Indian men thing bc who can blame her for that 😔🤡💀she did however feel like her dad was a patriarch with a misogyny issue but that's just every brown dad tbh :/// everytime I told her about a crush or about something some guy told me 🤪😜, she'd start the character assassination on him and make him sound like the worst person to have ever lived ,, and then lowkey make snide remarks that made me feel stupid for having my moment of fun😔like damn ma chill outtttt, I'm not having his babies!!!! We had a very homoerotic friendship so I feel like there's that as well 😬😶‍🌫️😬

[rosewaterandivy]

2024 fic review!

saw this going around somewhere and thought it'd be fun to do. if you'd like to play along, please do! the more the merrier ☺️

i'm limiting this list to wips that i've actually updated this year, rather than announcements or nascent ideas. but feel free to come up with whatever guidelines you'd like!

January

Blurb: Season of the Stick (?k words, as of writing)

eddie has a reputation and a temper. you have something to prove. and hop, well, he has better things to worry about, but he sure as shit isn't blind. Hockey AU.

Oneshot: dick so good we be callin' him NyQuil (1.2k)

getting fucked to sleep by eddie, that's literally it. Explicit.

Series: Through Me - The Fool (6.3k)

Eddie and the Lady of the Lake, feat. advice from one Steve ‘The King’ Harrington. Soulmate Triad Constantine AU.

Series: Begin Again (5k, as of writing)

you weren't always soft. you weren't always his. Kidfic, Kas!Eddie, love triangle.

February

Blurb: Local werewolf annoys town (?k words)

the idea the birthed my werewolf series. Best friend Eddie & confused Steve.

Oneshot (for now) Phármakon (?k words)

in the end, Owens got what he wanted, you and Harrington back in the Drift. because who cares about grief in the face of the apocalypse? Pacific Rim AU.

Series: Whatever's Still to Come (3.1k, as of writing)

Blood like yours, a love like yours could be halved and still be whole. Past lives, mythological reimagining, reincarnation AU, s.h. x reader.

March

Blurb: Ernest Frank only has lovely things to say about you (659 works)

the idea that eventually became my super senior high school eddie AU.

Oneshot: none, embarrassing 😳

Series: Everyone But You (15.4k words, as of writing)

From a blind date gone awry to a tense christening for none other than Chrissy Carver’s baby. Eddie and Munson and you had never quite seen eye to eye, except for the fact that Chrissy could do so much better than her scumbag of a husband. But a stormy night brings terrible news that drags you from the Upper West Side to fucking Williamsburg like some a harbinger of doom, only to end up at said fuckboy’s door. Life As We Know It AU.

April

Blurb: none 😬

Oneshot: none 😬

Series: it'd be cooler if you did (4.2k words, as of writing)

‘86 is gonna be his year, by hook or by crook, Eddie’s walking the stage at graduation and getting that damned diploma. he just needs to focus, but then he took one look at you and— well, you can see for yourself. super senior high school eddie, no UD AU.

Series: careful fear & dead devotion (10.7k words, as of writing)

and you want to beg, like Andromache on the ramparts of Troy, don’t do this, don’t have me nurse fresh grief, but his gaze in reply is redolent and kind, do not borrow sorrows from tomorrow, for you and I have arrived at the grief we were born for. marriage of convenience, Gilded Age AU, s.h. x reader/oc.

Series: Modern Love (4.9k, as of writing)

Modern Steve and Eddie in alternating parts. Meet cutes, dating.

May

Blurb: werewolf senses are tingling (590 words)

steve & eddie's scents head canon

Oneshot: cathedrals (1.8k) - could be a stand alone, if you're not into the OG series hit me like a hook of the right

In the cathedrals of New York and Rome / There is a feeling that you should just go home past actor s.h. x reader/oc

Series: in the woods somewhere (7.6k words, as of writing)

everything was fine. you had it all handled. and then eddie just had to go and run his mouth. to harrington, of all people. ("you woke up on his doorstep!" / "that is neither here nor there, edward.") werewolf fic makes it's debut.

June

Blurb: rumored nights & the rendezvous (752 words)

a prep-school princess and cuntycountry club queen always gets what she wants High school, one night stand, King Steve antics

Blurb: Caught in the Throes (552 words); a Crawl Til Dawn installment

Were you praying at the Lares shrine? || He supposes it could've gone better. winter soldier AU.

Blurb: dragon steve (102 words)

constellations of gold adorn his skin, glimmering in the fading light. he eyes you up and down, with a veiled interest borne of the aristocracy.

Blurb: pornstar steve (337 words)

Steve’s big break was because he was a last minute replacement for a guy who canceled a job the day before filming. bts porn, origins of 'Hung Harrington.'

Oneshot: none 😔

Series: Through Me - Justice (8.5k words)

The world is of but men and beasts, and you cower to none. Soulmate Triad Constantine AU.

July

Blurb: once, twice, three times a lady (224 words)

“So how many times was it then?” hangover & eddie the nuisance.

Oneshot: none

Series: none

Other: dragon steve mb

Of course, she wakes the dragon.

Other: dragon eddie mb

Love always wakes the dragon.

August

Blurb: pornstar eddie (351 words)

and yeah, he may have been up since 4 a.m. that day and a little surly upon arrival. but by the time the scene wraps, he can’t wipe the smile from his face or stop the spring in his step. bts porn, feat. smug eddie

Oneshot: answer July— ah, said July— (4.7k words)

The soft pad of your index finger trails down the scar of his jaw, lingering there as you smile, a little different from before. Softer, somehow. As if it’s just for him. Summersong Request-athon for "July, July!" from Meg; eddie x reader.

Series: in the woods somewhere - bisclavret (5.8k words)

and here he thought he’d hit the bricks when it came to library visits. werewolf fic.

wouldn't know where to start (1k words)

It was nearing sundown as he drove into the small town. Soft summer winds blew through the wheat fields, bending the golden stalks as if it were an ocean of glimmering sunlight. storm chaser steve.

September

Blurb: river for your spring mouth (1.2k words)

He could’ve passed for human if not for his sublime beauty and skin speckled with starfall. dragon eddie & "Starwatcher" for Summersong Request-athon.

Oneshot: buried the bright edge deep (3.2k words)

Dustin, decidedly, is not faring well. Summersong Request-athon for "Burial Ground" from Somna; eddie-centric.

Series: summer soldier, sunshine patriot from aim low, aim true (wip, on-going)

every war story is a love story, but never in the way you’d expect. WWII AU; e.m. x reader/oc & s.h. x reader/oc

October

Blurb: nada

Oneshot: zip

Series: zilch

November

Blurb: never quite as it seems (?k words)

Oneshot: vena amoris (2.5k words)

“Ritchie Rich,” You’d said with a smile, “Voting solely for your interests or ready to join the proletariat with the rest of us?” Trust fund college era s.h.

Series: whatever's still to come - i. (1.7k words)

piercing like a golden arrow, laving like a tongue. Past lives, reincarnation AU.

Series: give you my wild (1.1k words, as of writing)

Richard Thomas Harrington didn’t hold much stock in the trivialities of faith— prayer, destiny, whatever you call it, and they did not deter him along life’s path. Kid fic, past s.h. x oc Sloane Schuyler

December:

Blurb: mechanic eddie (?k words)

something about eddie working the air pressure line at the mechanic’s shop during the first cold snap of the year. Meet cute

Oneshot: all is calm (1.6k words)

the first time, it was an accident. the second time? a coincidence. but the third time… well, unfortunately it’s a habit. s.h. x reader, FWB holiday edition

Series: choicless hope in grief - I. Kairos (4k words, as of writing)

someone has to tell the tale, even if it doesn’t turn out well. it’s one we already know: you will die. in fact, you’re already dead, have been since the beginning. but maybe, it’ll turn out different in the end. Mythological retelling, e.m. x reader, angst

Series: twice as many stars (?k words, as of writing)

Steve Harrington is man who has nothing but time. No, really. Leaving nothing except a vague note, his daughter slips into the past with only a familiar token for an anchor. His busted watch gives him a hint as to the when and where of it all, but does little to calm his nerves.

Or

In order to piece together the present, you have to rewrite the past. Time travel, fix-it, kid fic, Harrington reader

[trippinsorrows]

👏🏼👏🏼👏🏼👏🏼👏🏼👏🏼👏🏼👏🏼

I swear that oneshot was even better than I remembered! 🤍🤍🤍

But now I have to ask, and this is just me being messy, mixing up stories 🤭 but, would Solana had agreed to that kind of life if Roman was

a) married to someone else by arrangement (not love, just like with Solana at first, married to have a heir while he hoes around. And while hoeing around he found Solana)

and b) while already together and with a kid he tells he has to get married to someone else 😬😬😬 to keep his place at the head of the table

i deadass forgot writing it until anon asked 😭😭😭 i gotta get better with tagging and organizing shit, man. smh

but this ask?!?!!? mistress!solana but actually she's the love of his life, and they can't be together because he's with someone else???

a) yes, i think he would. i think he would be married to.....don't hate me, but samantha. let's say her family was an acceptable one. but fuck that bitch. solana is his heart, and she loves him, and he loves her. how would they meet? would she still have the same kind of fucked up family? part of me says yes, to some extent, and he doesn't hesitate to put her up in house, set up security for her, etc. and probably kills xavier and wes. lmao

b) oh man, that would gut her. i'm not too sure about that. it would be angsty as shit. i mean, our poor sis is heartbroken because she always knew it could happen but prayed it wouldn't. a part of me thinks she would leave him. maybe take their son and move to mexico (let's say nina is still alive), because she doesn't want their child growing up as the bastard while roman's 'official' children are recognized. something like:

"how is this supposed to work, roman? hmm? you're her husband on the weekdays but my boyfriend and father to our child on the weekend?"

he runs his hand through his hair, frustrated by every fucking part of this shit. "i don't know okay! i'll figure something out."

"there's nothing to figure out! we can't do this anymore!"

time stands still. "what?"

her eyes are watering, the emotion of it all finally overcoming her. "roman, your family will never accept our son as your heir. he's a bastard to them, and i'm just the whore who birthed him."

"solana---"

"i understand your duty, but---but you have to understand that mine is to....it's to our son, roman, and i can't.....i can't put him through that."

"what are you saying?"

"ro, i---i don't know if it's a good idea for you to continue to be in his life." her voice cracks at the same moment her heart breaks. "or mine."

[mrs-monaghan]

Can you give me the difference of supporter and a shipper?

Does the supporter means they will support whatever they decide and move on? Do the supporters think there is something that's in jkk romantically? Or just their bond?

Shippers are very surface like. They don't truly believe that Jikook is real. Jikook is their favourite duo and they enjoy their moments and maybe some have managed to imagine Jikook are indeed a couple. But not really. It takes very little to change their minds about Jikook.

Shippers are just there to ship but they operate like Jikook are in a fanfic. They never treat them like real people. Some shippers are super Y/N too. U will find they are the ones who draw Jimin with a pu$$y instead of a dick like the man that he is. That way it assists in their fantasy of fucking JK.

They don't care much that Jikook are in the closet so they're the ones commenting Jeon Jimin under JK's lives. They're the ones tagging him under Jikook edits 😬😬😬 and they're the ones always spreading the halago photo despite how incriminating that photo is. I honestly think they think Jikook are just another ship from a Kdrama or some shit.

As for supporters most of us are in relationships or have ever been in rlships. Or at least have witnessed healthy relationships. It's why we stan Jikook to begin with. Because we saw the couple behaviour and we immediately knew something was sus.

Thats why I'm a bit concerned when some married tkkrs call themselves supporters and yet what they consider to be normal is JK ignoring V. It tracks with how u hear some of them complaining their husband has forgotten their anniversary for the 4th time in a row. Being cheated on is what these people know so they can accept how JK acts with Jimin infront of V coz they're getting that at home. It's quite sad when u think about it 🤔

Anyway anon, Jikook supporters most importantly understand what's at stake here. That's why it doesn't matter what incriminating thing they have on Jikook, it will never see the light of day. I suspect if Jikook ever stop hiding, these kisses and hand holds or cuddles will start popping up but until then people really be walking around acting like they don't have gold in their galleries. Damn. Mad respect to y'all thou.

A supporter understands that sometimes partners don't pick up their phones. So during this

When Jimin said he gets obsessive when JK doesn't answer his calls, while shippers latched onto the fact that JK sometimes doesn't pick up and started saying they were broken up, Supporters we latched onto the fact that Jimin gets obsessive with JK. 🥺🥺 It's cute as hell.

This year when there was no sign of Jikook together shippers were already dropping like flies. Meanwhile supporters we knew that didn't mean dick. In fact its insane to think that just because we don't see them 2gether that means they're not a couple anymore. I wanna use the R word but someone will prolly come for me if I do but that's how stupid I think that kind of reasoning is.

Anon, there is no way to answer this question in one sentence, so I hope you're getting my drift here. Supporters don't need to see to believe. All of us are walking around with the knowledge that Jikook were definitely together for JK's birthday. Shippers still think it didn't happen until proven otherwise.

I hope I answered your question. This is why we don't like being called shippers because they take Jikook way too lightly for our liking.

[voloslovelydivinity]

ParadiseLostshipping (Or UUU)(Volo X Mystic selfship)

Sometime in june or july was when we started dating

We got married offically on Nov 7th

READ THE COLORED PARAGRAPHS BEFORE INTERACTING

I am a non sharer interact with caution. Don't get pissy if I block you

I use He/they/It Pronouns

Mystic my self insert is pokemon platinum based

TLDR: Volo and I married irl and spiritually. I have an astral ring on my finger. Due to Volo having an egergore. Its as real and important to me as any physical human relationship due to many traumatic experiences of dealing with physical human relationships. Our love is real as anyone elses especially due to my swearing off human relationships(meaning I'm not actively searching for one) it didn't feel right to me to be with someone else who will hurt me when I'm with Volo who fulfills every bit of my needs and romantic environments that I subconsciously was craving. Respect that its as real to me as your human physical relationship and or your relationship with your f/o. Your experience is yours. mine is mine. I am just a Giratina otherkin rotting away in human flesh prison enjoying life with my husband

Lets say my selfship isn't always cupcakes and rainbows so scroll away if you not into that more heavy (but nons*exual) k*nky stuff ITS JUST ME BEING DUMB AND SELF INDULGENT😅😬

And yes he does see me as his Giratina due to our relationship dynamic we have(pet play/sub/dom scenerio)

SELF SHIPPERS WITH VOLO INTERACT WITH ME WITH GREAT CAUTION! I AM PROTECTIVE AND GET ANXIOUS AND JEALOUS EASILY SO YEAH

It is a major part of my spiritual practice and our relationship is as real to me as any human physical relationship(since Volo is an actual entity in my practice) so please respect that and don't claim its mental illness (I know I am neurodivergent and what I have and don't have mentally)so no self diagnosing me because I'm an actual pagan(who works mostly with Greek Deities)/occultist and I will immediately block you

I had zero control of the situation. But apparently due to the universes constraints and multiple variables adding up. He found me apparently despite my late arrival to the pla party and in his words "fated red string brought us together" . Took me a while and a side-fiasco with Adaman (Volo didn't like that so guess who I chose!?) to fully accept that Volo was dead serious about me and our relationship like h u h!? Never had an entity do that. He is to me a divinized human like a roman Emperor with the sol invictus archetype and values. But he still is mysterious as ever. I can feel, hear and sense him in my space using my Clairsentience and Clairaudience and I astral project to interact with him on his level(since again he is a spiritual entity) and to go on dates etc

Mostly created with Volo channeling through me who was also in an altered state so pardon the sloppyness. I am also working on another template. Yes he sees me as a Giratina gijinka with starry sky hair in the most conceptulized form . Its a thing that is awful. VOLO HAS SWIRLING PURPLE ENERGY IN HIS CHEST IE A PURPLE HEART HHHHHHHH

Our ship name is a play on our exclamation when one of us does something so romantic and or sensual it makes us loose our braincells in the best way

"YOUUUUUUUU~"

And it is called ParadiseLostShipping due to Mystic being a fallen angelic being is because we are both considered an unholy abomination in the eyes of our respective divinity and we let our unhinged apocalypse inducing actions spit in the face of God itself idk a divinized Luciferian troped merchant head over heels over a literal fallen angel sounds pretty sacrilegious and we both are not above wanting to nuke and recreate the world in a fit of nihilistic rage and sorrow at the state of humanity due to the so called creator letting it go to shit.

yes I will be using Piers and or Giratina to represent me (in pokemas)from now on due to similar fashion and demeanor so if you see Piers or Giratina with Volo it equals Mystic and Volo

He thinks of me as a divinity and calls me his Goddexx and or his Fallen Angel/Star(due to me being a Seraphim who fell in past life and due to me being associated with stars), a little devil due to me being his Giratina(lore wise more of an avatar of Giratina). It is a bratty sub/dom relationship thats all I'm saying on that🫣. Red chain leash and red string of fate. Yes we OFFICALLY GOT MARRIED TONIGHT ONTOP OF THE TEMPLE OF SINNOH NOT SHITTING YOU

Volo says "our love is transcendent beyond time and space" And "fated"

Which I'm scared of marriage

our ship aesthetic Void/Occult/Fallen Angelcore/Classical/Celestial/ idk lets say unsettling imagery with darker esoteric/hermetic or religious themes, places that makes one uncomfortable yet serene, divine madness with Biblically accurate angels along with churches, and or Luciferian motifs. Gloomy Traditional Japanese settings with fog and nature , Golden hour sunsets over oceans and the nightsky at dusk with some clouds, Stargazer Lilies, Bleeding heart, White and red Roses and sunflowers. Golds, whites, indigo, dark purples, reds, black and dark green

Vol is practically a monster fucker since I am an eldritch being of stars, abyssal energy and thought up dreamscapes a borderline nullified conglomerate of holy and unholy abstractions rotting away in a physical human vessel ⚠️ along with me being a biblically accurate angel yeah things get freaky

Me with Volo

Mystic's true form leaking out practically

Again we are soul bonded by the red string of fate since in his eyes apparently my outlandish Eldritch Horror of a gremlin self is interesting and he loves interesting things. Also he rambles with the finger point and everything especially when he is in his calmer less intense mode. He is very overprotective of me 🥴

We are connected by many things we share the same worldview. I do not deserve him but he says otherwise.

He is my radiant King, my God , my stargazer and my Beloved Sun ☀️👼💛

I'm his beloved little devil worm, his fallen star/angel, his Divinity 🌠👹🪽

Volo is overprotective of me and doesn't take anyone hurting me or abusing me.

🔺️🔺️🔺️This persons post will explain Volo and I's relationship basically 👁🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺💛💛💛💛💙💙💙

devotional drawing of him

Volo is a bit stricter and traditional romance and marriage ie more "human" since in his source he is originally a human but now is more of a divinized human like how roman Emperors are in my eyes and experience . Tbh volo since he a pop culture entity he doesn't allow me to be spoused to other pop culture entities ie traditional monogamy but if I'm spoused to actual deities that is fine since thats another level of devotion and very different

Vol altar that keeps growing

So enjoy this blog that is devoted to him and I. He is my one and only 👁❤️‍🔥🥰🧏🏼‍♂️❤️

[sugar-omi]

okay, so i've been doing some thinking. i've been scrolling through your blog and i stepped upon these "cheating on cove with Baxter and the other way around" scenarios. (i'm sorry, i wasn't able to read them, my heart couldn't take it ;-;) but!

what if mc was like, in a normal relationship with Baxter. you know, a couple, maybe married later and stuff, while of course still being besties with Cove. later mc and Baxter have a kid together, maybe still a small baby but! plot twist! Baxter gets into an accident or something and dies. (i'm sorry, he's my favourite man but i had to kill him for that scenario:'))

mc is completely devastated and also a little panicked, because what about the baby? and then Cove stepps in, deciding to help his best friend take care of the little one and basically becomes its father. i recently watched a video of a dog "helping" a cat take care of her kittens, and there you have it.

this one may be boring, so feel free to ignore, but i can't stop thinking about it.

ITS OK<333 I figured some ppl didn't read it bc angst n pain</3 trust me I skip over angst all the time

(I even have the tag blocked😬 sorry angst writers but I will read it and not be the same for months, I read a kiribaku angst fic years ago, and was devesated for 4 months afterwards LMAO)

okay i... I cannot expand too much on this bc OUCH

(eta now that I've finished. who am I fooling? I rlly said that like I haven't wrote a whole novel 💀 anyway <3 this clearly made me pop off more than I thought I would bc I read this at first n was devastated!!! I had no words!!!! well clearly I found them LOL)

ALSO BORING??? ANON PLEASE.. BORING WHERE<///3

n im gonna fix the format later but for now here is the bare minimum. I'm going to bed rn so nini everyone enjoy a bit of angst I promise its fluffy as well<333

tags: Angst, Hurt/Comfort

p/n = parental name, since I wanted to leave flexibility for all the readers here <3

but anyway yeah cove would so step up for you

will follow you to the end of the earth and do whatever you need to help you work through this and to adapt to this sudden and unfortunate change

if/when your relationship starts becoming something romantic, cove would absolutely put the brakes on everything and you'd go so slow...

I imagine he'd probably move in with you or you with him, and he'd stay somewhere else (if you're living in his house he will leave anyway, he's a gentleman like that fr) so that way you can figure out if it's not just bc he's doing all these things n you're mistaking admiration for love

you'd spend the first year going super slow, as if you've never known each other before

which technically you haven't, since you've never dated before. but cove would go so far as to find out your favorite color, song, animal, food.. all over again, even though he has it memorized and knows your likes better than his own.

once cove is sure you're ready for this (after much talk between the two of you and even with your therapist that yes you've made enough progress and are emotionally ready for this) does he finally put a label on it

now if you get married...

I imagine cove won't propose at all

like I think you'd have to talk n almost beg him...

in that case he would do a small but grande gesture to propose. or he'd propose to you before you've even left the bed for the day... no inbetween

but like 8 times outta 10, you're gonna have to propose to him

he'd cry and hug you n say yes of course.

and unless you want to keep this outta your wedding, I think cove would include baxter in your wedding.

first, ofc you'd have the picture to honor his memory

but I think he'd even go so far as to have smth in his vows. but to start, he'd say smth like:

"I know the reason we became closer was unfortunate, but I'm so happy to be able to call you and [Child] my family. and I hope I can be a good father and husband"

and "baxter will always have a place in our hearts. even though he and I didn't get along at first (watery chuckle)... I'm glad he got to love you, and I hope he trusts me to love and cherish you the same way as well.."

also if you don't want to give up your wedding ring from baxter, I think cove would even go so far as to suggest combining it with his.

!!! omg I was gonna say your and baxter's wedding bands would be black, but I have another idea

okay now, for YOUR bands, I imagine they're either black or silver and yk those infinity(?) bands? that has the 2 types of metal or whatever

that's what cove would suggest doing. and if you are worried abt people asking why your bands are different, he'd get the same twisted band but silver with say a black diamond or smth. just smth to make it look like it's intentionally different colors but same design or smth

(im overthinking a bit but it's an idea right?! I'm not crazy??<////3)

or if you don't wanna do that, I imagine you can just slip it on a necklace or leave it as is, whatever you want. he wouldn't mind even if you kept wearing it, cove would never ask you to get rid of baxter's image or memory in any way, not unless it was a real problem and your attachment to him/his things was unhealthy anyway.

now for baxter's band... well if you didn't bury it with him, I imagine you'd give it to your child

another thing I think you could do w your wedding band as well, and give them both your bands to do whatever they want with. or if they don't want it of course you're not forcing them to keep it

even though they didn't get to know baxter, the way you and cove still cherish baxter's memory does help them feel something of a connection.

I also imagine baxter would take lots of photo n video w the kid, even though they're young n just a babe, theres so many videos of baxter looking n acting so loving w them

and even a couple where he's teary-eyed n all "imma do you right by you. I love you so much.."

of course, if the kid doesn't feel that connected to baxter since they were too young to know or rmbr anything, and they don't feel anything much other than sympathy and the occasional sting when they see how much baxter loved them, you don't force it.

you both know that baxter was basically a stranger to them and even though they still respect baxter and he has a place in their heart, they don't feel like they're lacking anything.

"I don't really know what to say.. or how to feel... I see how much [P/N] misses you sometimes, and we have pictures of you, and they talk about you and stuff...

but I don't feel like im missing a dad. I hope that doesn't hurt your feelings, I wish I knew you too. sometimes I wish you were still here, so I got to know you as well, even though I'm still happy to have dad cove for my dad.

I just wanna know what you were like. I wanna experience what you were like. I... I wanna miss you like everyone else misses you too...

anyway, just know that dad is great! he takes care of me and [P/N] really well! he makes breakfast in bed, and he does/used to do this thing where he lifts me in the air before bed! he's so cool. I see how he makes [P/N] happy as well, so don't worry. although, [P/N] said you always thought cove was reliable and a good guy so maybe you aren't worrying anyway.

well... that's it I guess. i hope ill get to know you one day, and maybe you can tell me you're glad to see dad took good care of us. goodbye,

baxter."

pa."

cove happily listens to anything they have to say on how they feel abt baxter btw. he accepts any of their feelings, be it that they don't feel anything at all, sympathy for others, or they feel sad abt losing him.

if they do say smth like how even though it's unfortunate and they feel bad for everyone who mourns baxter (for example/especially you), they see cove as their dad and don't feel like they're missing anything and they're happy to have cove for their dad.

ofc he cries n hugs them n tells them he loves em and he's happy n he comforts them if needed of course

I also think cove is very scared abt being a father

especially in this way... even if the kiddo doesn't remember anything, or it's hazy at best, he worries about replacing baxter.

he'd probably worry abt not living up to baxter

baxter was always much more mature, at least it seemed that way most times. cove just worries about if he has the backbone and the ability to parent the child well and be someone they can look up to and/or appreciate for being a good father

cries if they call him dad btw

if they do it before you start dating, I imagine it's one of the catalyst that cause you to talk abt your feelings for each other. or if it's in the early stage..

cove prbly freezes and runs away to the other room n freaks out, definitely cries. if you don't talk to him like right after he calls his dad n cries n shares his worries n fear

either way, when you do talk he's biting his nails n trying not to pace around the room and he's like "if you wanna distance yourselves so that they don't call me dad any more I totally understand, I mean idk it's prbly weird for you-"

n he just rambles. like none of it makes sense n u have to physically shut him up. kiss him, yell, throw a pillow, hit him w the child's stuffed animal, throw a single lego brick at his back and watch him fall to the floor like he just got a nuke thrown at him

if it's later on n theres nothing to worry abt bc youve talked abt this or saw it coming or its just the otherwise most natural step, he cries of course

but he doesn't fall apart from being his in the back w a single fucking Lego as if it hurt 🙄🙄🙄🙄 (I hate this man he's DRAMATIC)

well... actually no he does

hit him, kiss him, hug him, run him over w a hotel wheels truck.... he just cries harder

adopts them like immediately basically

I imagine you do it soon, like maybe before the wedding just so that way you can have a private moment (just to save him some embarrassment from ugly crying in front of your families. in fact he just might faint fr)

n you + the kiddo surprise him w adoption papers (depending on how old the babe is at this point, they have like no idea what's going on but they know that cove is now officially recognized by the whole world (even by the unicorns n wizards n warlocks) as their daddy))

imagine laying in bed w cove n the kid in between you two

and when you wake up, cove is alrdy awake and was watching you two. he was petting the kids wild hair and he had pulled the two of you in and kept you under his arm..

and the sunlight is coming in, the day is just perfect. n the look on cove's face is full of so much love but also a bit somber this time

(cove feels awkward being here like this sometimes. during times like this you have to remind him it's okay, and you pull him back in. of course he does the same for you on those days.)

"I love you two. so much..." he whispers, tears sticking to his lashes

the kid flips over, curling into cove and they stop their sleepy mumbling now that they're tucked into cove's chest, feeling warm, happy, and safe.

you whisper equally as tender. "we were meant to be like this too."

also!! smth I just thought of...

imagine the kid looks mostly/very much like baxter. they act very much like cove's kid

like you would think cove n baxter had a kid together LOL

(if the resemblance is too much, they ask if you're the step parent </3 pls Ik it may not make sm sense but I just think it'd be so fuckin funny)

[running-in-the-dark]

got a new hard drive (had to, no space left 😔), so I'm using that as a reason to completely reorganise my files (mostly shows, movies etc)

I'm having such a good time 💖

[steddie-island]

20 questions for writers

Tagged by @puppy-steve ❤️

1. How many works do you have on AO3?

24! Which doesn't feel like a lot but up until last October, my count was 1. 😌

2. What's your total AO3 word count?

42,730

3. What fandoms do you write for?

Steddie primarily, but I do RP Ineffable Husbands and occasionally Destiel.

4. What are your top 5 fics by kudos?

Just Because We Get Around

Mutually Beneficial (I'm super proud of this one, and it's really cool that it's gotten enough attention to be so close to the top of the list!)

With Extra Nuts

Dustin's Dad

Vixen (Which is the most surprising one on this list for some reason lol)

5. Do you respond to comments?

It might take me a bit but I always try to! If people take the time to leave comments I want them to know that I appreciate it.

6. What is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

I don't think I have any with an angsty ending. Potentially Don't go where I can't follow, which is less than a thousand words but it might be the fic that I'm the proudest of.

7. What's the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

All of them are pretty soft and schmoopy honestly. I could say Forever Yours (Faithfully) but I'm going to go with the most tooth-rotting one which is Nothin' but the kitchen sink.

8. Do you get hate on fics?

No, thank god. 😬

9. Do you write smut? If so, what kind?

😈 I'm going to say all kinds? Soft and sweet, down and dirty. I want people ridden hard and put away wet.

10. Do you write crossovers?

I almost said I don't but I'm literally working on a Baron x Eddie fic. 😂

11. Have you ever had a fic stolen?

Not that I know of.

12. Have you ever had a fic translated?

I don't think so?

13. Have you ever co-written a fic before?

I got into fandom by RP'ing, and I actually have a couple of them that we've been polishing up to post.

14. What's your all-time favorite ship?

Destiel was my ride or die for a long time. It's how I met my spouse and a few of our friends. Like SPN was a shitshow, and Steddie has taken over the brainrot, but damn if destiel wasn't there for me when I needed it.

15. What's a WIP you want to finish but doubt you will?

Honestly I've had a hard time getting any words to go recently. Right now it feels like A leg to stand on is just going to rot in my WIP folder forever, even though it was just supposed to be PWP (what the fuck guys.) I think realistically, though, if I don't finish anything it's going to be the long fic that I've had outlined for months and also haven't touched. Like I have a playlist for it and I know what I want to do but actually getting words into a doc? Ha. Ha. Haha.

16. What are your writing strengths?

I think I'm good at writing angst. Even though I don't write a ton of it. I'm good at changing the tone between one sentence and the next (and that is why don't go where I can't follow is my favorite fic of mine.)

17. What are your writing weaknesses?

My pacing is off sometimes, I always have to have spouse read and be like "Does this work?? Do I need something else here instead??" As much as I love Scream for me I feel like the ending kind of got rushed in my excitement to post it. 😅

18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language in fic?

It's something I would love to try but I would want to be really careful and not be an author who writes a character who speaks mainly in english, just throws out a random word or phrase of another language to say "See? It's diverse they DO speak another language!" lol. I would definitely want to not just rely on google translate and actually talk to someone who could tell me my sentences made sense.

19. First fandom you wrote for?

RP, it was SPN. But the first fic I published was for Frasier (it's called "Passionfruit", it's Niles and Daphne. Frasier is such a niche little fandom on ao3 but I wrote that in just a couple of hours and I was so fucking proud of myself. And like, it's hot. 😌

20. Favorite fic you've written?

I said it up there ^^ but I think it has to be Don't go where I can't follow. Again, less than 1,000 words but it's a little story with a lot of punch to it, and I will admit that I go back and read it regularly. 😌

Thank you for the tag, this was fun!!

No pressure tags for @pearynice @wynnyfryd @just-my-latest-hyperfixation @pennyplainknits and literally anyone else who wants to do this. ❤️

Full pressure tag for @v3llichor because I'm your wife and you have to. 😘

[lively-potter]

— trials of athena ; four

— genre ; enemies to lovers, kinda slow burn, friends to lovers

— warnings ; a hella lot of cursing, some typos ( of course 🙄😬 ), mature themes, smut, athena doesn’t like feelings, fluff, smut, angst, some violence, a teeny bit of blood and gore, JK’s a dick fr

— intro, teaser, part one, part two, part three

— find me on Wattpad ; LivelyPotter

— 2024 © LivelyPotter all rights reserved

— word count ; 2k

— taglist ; @ahgasegotarmy116 @jk97bam

chapter four ; “my brain is experiencing technical difficulties.”

May 23rd, 2023 9 AM

The next morning, I was still annoyed that my family didn't let me give that rotten rat shit a piece of my mind. It got even worse when Mom and the rest of my family were basically infatuated with that cabbage head.

Mother dearest couldn't stop saying how kind he was. How respectful he was. How sweet. How handsome.

JK this, and JK that.

Constantly.

Gag.

He's a two faced, hotter than the sun, little rat bastard.

After finishing my second round of editing my manuscript for my latest book and sending my agent an email to clue him in on my latest accomplishment, I tore myself away from my desk and stretched my poor, aching shoulders.

"Yo bitch, did you even hear me?" Sawyer hollered through the phone.

"Sonofabitch – Sawyer, you ass! You scared the shit out of me." I grumped, grabbing my phone from the desk and taking it off speaker phone. I set the phone against my ear and flopped back on my bed.

"Sorry dude," I sighed, stretching out my body. "What were you saying?" I asked, lips pulling up in a grin when Sawyer started to whine.

"I was telling your bitch ass that I'm gonna be home soon to see your little boy toy," he snickered.

My eyes widened, "That rotten beaver nugget is not anything to me, and he is anything but little – if we're getting technical about it."

Sawyer moaned tortured, "I can't believe I missed that. I wanna go home."

"Same," I sighed, "I wish you were here. But when you get back, you can come stay with me if it's cool with your parents – which would be a good excuse to see the dickwad next door."

"We could always egg his house," Sawyer said thoughtfully. I laughed loudly and shook my head.

"I wish." I grunted, "But Mom and the others would murder us if we did."

I could picture Sawyer smirking, "They're probably hoping he'll be your future husband." He cackled.

My face flushed heavily from anger or envy—never mind. No. My face did flush from anger, it couldn't be anything else. I wouldn't allow it to be anything else.

"Fuck that!" I squawked, "He's insufferable." I stuck my nose in the air, lip curling as I did so.

Sawyer tutted, "Okay then, so you don't mind if I steal him?"

Yes.

"No," I replied, mentally smacking myself across the face. I absentmindedly traced the bruise on my cheek. "Go on ahead, Sweetpea. Plus, he isn't a possession to steal, bro."

Try it and I'll saw your tiny balls off and shove them down your throat.

A lump grew in my throat at that terrifying thought.

"Anyways," I quickly changed the subject once I heard Mom call for me downstairs. "I gotta go, Mom's calling me – but I'll call you later and tell you any new gossip, 'kay?"

"Kay, hoe. Love you."

A laugh escaped my lips, "Love you too, cunt."

I hung up the phone and pocketed my phone and rushed downstairs.

Mom was waiting for me at the dining room table. I walked into the large room and saw her on her laptop with a stack of papers on her left side.

"Whatcha up to, Ma?" I asked, plopping down into the seat across from her. Mom peered up at me over her glasses with a big smile.

"Hi, sweetie." She greeted, holding a small piece of paper in her french manicure hands. "Would you mind picking up a couple last minute things at the store for me?" She asked, "I would ask one of your dads to do it, but they're dealing with something at the diner."

"Sure, I don't mind. What do you need?" I asked, brows furrowing when she handed me the piece of paper in her hands.

"Here's a list," She smiled, and pecked the top of my head, eyeing the bruise with barely contained amusement. "Thank you."

"No problem," I shrugged, "Just let me get dressed and I'll head out."

I got up from the table and on my way to the stairs, Mom called after me.

"I love you! Oh! And if you see our neighbor; be sure to be nice, Athena."

My face dropped in agitation, "I'll try." To get on his nerves. "But he deserved fuckin' Nair in his shampoo."

***

May 23rd, 2023 10:55 AM

After dressing in black leggings, a random oversized AC/DC shirt I stole from North, and then proceeding to steal his jeep to drive myself to the nearest store, I was already seething after being caught up in a fuckin' traffic jam.

Ugh.

I really hated going out sometimes (what the fuck am I saying? I hate leaving home period).

"Let's get this over with." I mumbled, jumping out of North's jeep (which would soon be mine if I played my cards right, if he didn't rip my heart out after finding out I stole it first.)

Oops.

With Papa's credit card in hand, along with Mom's list; I proceeded my walk into the store.

Twenty minutes had passed, and I nearly had everything – deodorant, shampoo, conditioner, Mom's green juice, and oddly enough a skin tag remover.

With my arms full, I peered down at the last items and paled.

Tampons, I could deal with. But condoms? Eww.

I gagged and cringed.

"This is fucking mortifying," I whispered to myself.

Who knew I would have to buy my parents' condoms. But with all the shit that's been happening recently; it didn't seem too far-fetched. But still nasty.

I hesitantly walked into the women's hygiene isle and got the biggest pack of tampons I've ever seen and squared my shoulders and looked at the ground; briskly walking towards the end of the isle, not paying attention to where I was going until I bumped into a rock wall.

"Oww." I winced, holding my bruised cheek with my free hand, "I'm so sorry, please excuse—" I looked up and froze.

Holy Peanut Butter and Jelly Crackers.

The bitch glaring darkly at me was my neighbor, the unnecessary movie sequel. Who stood towering above me, (glaring darkly, might I add, once again), for accidentally bumping into him.

"...Never mind." I raised a brow. I tried side stepping him, but that stupid beaver bitch nugget stood in front of me, blocking me from moving – for no reason.

I gulped, eyes flashing down to his crouch. It was like getting fucking PTSD flashbacks. Of his monster dick tearing that women's throat in two.

(not that I see all of it happen – it was just my imagination, you dirty hoes)

I bet she'll be having to suck on some of those throat lozenges my dad gives me when I get sick to get some feeling back there.

I tore my eyes away from his pants and felt the back of my neck flush as I took in his outfit.

Black combat boots seemed to be his norm, along with dark clothing. This time the dickhead wore baggy pants, a white tank with a open button down shirt overtop. You could still see the tattoos on his arms, but I knew he had a lot more. A black studded belt tied the entire outfit together.

It tore me up admitting that the dude had style.

My mouth dried at the thought of his bare chest. And those abs. If I could squeal like a little girl at the image of his abs, you bet your bottom dollar I'd do it.

UH-THEE-NA

STOP THINKING OF HIM THIS WAY

HE IS A DICKFACE

A RUDE HOOLIGAN

My neighbor raised a brow of his own and licked at the silver hoops on his lips – eyeing me up and down. His doe eyes darkened back into a glare when he looked into my eyes to find I was looking at him hatefully in return.

"I liked you better when you were stuttering." He rasped, dark eyes flashing in amusement when I bared my teeth at him.

"And I liked you better when you were halfway across the country." I spit back, remembering his conversation with Mom and North last night when he told them he lived in California prior.

Gods, why did this man get me so angry, so quickly?

My neighbor threw back his head and laughed for a moment, and I took the chance to take him in. His dark black hair was shaved in the back, with his hair longer on top. It looked so soft and fluffy; I just wanted to touch and tug it.

Wut? No Athena – the only time I will be thinking about his fluffy hair is when I imagine it all falling out when I put Nair in his hair products.

My neighbor looked back down at me and bit the edge of his lip.

My eye twitched.

I remembered the way he bit his lip when that lady hit her knees in front of him.

DO NOT THINK OF THIS AGAIN.

"Can you get out of my way?" I gritted out through clenched teeth, don't lash out, Athena. Just don't...no matter how much you want to

My neighbor eyed my cheek curiously seeing the handprint shaped bruise and jerked his chin. "What happened there?"

Ah, nothing much. Only that I bitch slapped myself after seeing the pierced beast in your pants. No biggie.

"Not your business, you overdraft bank fee." I snapped. My neighbor's head neared back in shock, lips pursing to keep the smirk off his lips.

"Overdraft bank fee? Really? That's the best you got, Princess?" he asked, bending his knees down to lower his height to look me in the eyes.

I gasped at the disrespect, "Okay; listen here, you lunatic." My eye started to twitch again. Damn it. "I am not that short—"

"Really?" he snorted, eyes alight with amusement, "How tall are you? Five Foot?"

He stood to his full height and peered down at me, daring me.

"Four eleven and a quarter, thank you very much for asking." I cut in, ears blushing hotly as he snickered, "and two, I have a lot of insults – I can make you a list, if you'd like, fuckface. And three, my name is Athena, not Princess." I hissed lowly.

I held onto the box of tampons when he looked after I had finished my speech.

My hotter than the sun smirked again (ohmygod, does he not know how to smile? Only smirk?) and peered at the list in my hands.

"You have a mouth on you." He mused, watching with rapt attention as I choked slightly.

"Probably not as good as that lady a couple days ago." I muttered too lowly for him to hear.

His ears perked, "You say something, princess?" he asked, lips lifting in a little smirk.

The back of my neck flushed at the nickname.

I grasped the items in my arms tighter towards me, "Nothing. Now can you move out of my way?" I asked. My neighbor chuckled lowly and reached above my head to grab something.

Sonofabitch: my brain is experiencing technical difficulties.

The fabric of his shirt brushed against my chin, and I got a whiff of his cologne. It was light but fuckin' heavenly. Why did this insufferable salt slug smell so good.

"Here," His eyes sparkled in amusement as he dropped a medium sized box on top of the items in my hands. My face paled then brightened into a blush when I saw the box of condoms.

My neighbor watched my face color in sick amusement.

I wanted to reach over and smack the piss out of his gorgeous cheeks.

He backed away slowly, holding another box of condoms in his hand as he left, chuckling lowly.

"I'll be seeing you soon, princess."

Fuck.

It happened again.

I was malfunctioning. 

My eyes look to the right, and lit up once I saw the Nair powder.

Without a second thought and regret; I swiped the box up in my hands and went to the checkout.

I have a feeling I'll be needing this. Real soon.

A/N

i love my beloved athena sm. are y'all excited to meet sawyer?

[pebblysand]

Omggg pebbles! That mia pov fic🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺 I'm so in love with how you've portrayed her. She's heart broken but she's gonna get better, I hope she does. It's so sad that she was so hurt because of harry especially when harry didn't mean to do so at any point. I wonder if harry actually thinks about her and regrets their relationship for actually hurting her. Also pebbles, how do you think ginny feels about mia at this point? Are ginny and harry sorry that they kissed when harry was in a relationship with mia?

Also at some point do you think harry and miss could ever be in touch? And what about her father? Will that dickhead ever come back to his senses and treat his gem of a daughter the way she deserves? Will they ever be in touch?

Istg i have soooo many questions about mia. Thanks for writing about her, I see so much of myself in her and i can't help but root for her ❤❤❤

aww thanks ❤️. you have a lot of questions about mia? that's good - i have a lot of thoughts, lol 😆 (for reference and for anyone who hasn't read it - Mia fic is here)

it's funny, i recently had a similar discussion with folks on discord about mia getting to her own version of the epilogue. i think people generally want me to say that she's okay in the same way that people want(ed) JKR (obv. pre-JKR becoming awful) to tell them that george was "okay." this sort of comfort of: we know they've been through a lot but they're okay, please-tell-me-they're-okay, you know? and i remember JKR was always a bit like "😬 is he, though?" realistically speaking? i think that's how i feel about mia too.

on discord, about her epilogue, i said:

i think her epilogue in my head is maybe a bit more… bittersweet than other people's epilogues. cause i think (and this is totally my headcanon, you can see it differently), she has a lot of good things coming out of this. she’s able to establish boundaries with her parents in a much healthier way, she learns to trust herself and stops being such a people pleaser, she learns that she doesn’t have to do everything alone, she has an amazing career - all those things made possible by her character evolution while she was with harry. but there’s this bittersweet aspect of: i think to her, he is and will always be the one that got away. and the kind of love story they had, at the age she was (20/21), those are the things that just stick with you, you know? and i don’t think she regrets anything she did/decisions she made, but there’s this aspect of: he’s the one she fell in love with, and he’ll probably always be the one she will compare other people she dates to. and that’s just… it, you know? and i don’t think she’s sad forever, i think she has fun and has a good life and maybe even finds another partner if she wants to, but harry is the one she's always going be talking to her therapist about. again, that’s okay, and i feel for her So Much, but i think it does sort of have this impact on her that never truly goes away.

i think to me, when it came to shaping mia's character, it was very important for her to have her own arc, too. of course, she existed in reaction to harry's storyline, and was going to help him realise some things about himself, but i also wanted her to be a person, and to grow in her own way.

at her core, mia is someone who is very lonely. when we meet her, she's in her last year of uni. she's away from home, in an environment that is not her own, and basically has no one who really cares about her. her mother is having a new family (new husband, new baby) and while she loves her, she's also replacing her. this is a detail in chapter 13 but mia doesn't even have a bed in their new house. her father is an absolute arsehole who tries to control her life after being absent for 17 years, and she doesn't really have friends. harry always says she has a lot of people around her, but they're school friends, acquaintances, going-out friends, not people she'd ever actually confide in. when she's starving herself trying to survive, no one notices. she says so herself in chapter 14:

‘You know no one else [cares], right?’ she says, then. Looks up to cross his gaze and takes his breath away. ‘Not my dad, not my mum, not my friends in school where I’m like,’ she speaks quick, rolling her eyes, ‘the token black girl with the funny accent from up North when their parents all know people - bloody Vivienne Westwood or something,’ she sighs. Her voice breaks. For the first time that morning, he hears tears in her words. ‘And, I don’t even hold it against them. They’ve all got objectively more important things than me to worry about. It’s just so fucking lonely sometimes.’ 

i think when i was building her character, i kept thinking about how lonely i felt during my first years in uni. mia isn't a self-insert in the way that i think we're very different people (god, i would have dumped his arse so much quicker), but that's definitely something i wanted to address in castles. in popular culture, we tend to romanticise our early twenties and uni years as the "best time of our lives," but the more i think back, and the more i talk to my friends now, as a grown-up, the more i realise that many of us have this very similar experience of deep loneliness and this feeling of being "lost" in the wild world of early adulthood. it's not just about mia's family, or her friends, or her doomed romantic relationship with harry. what makes her relatable, i think, is this general feeling of loneliness and inadequacy that we've all felt at some point in that time period of our lives. you're in uni, you're sitting there stressing about finding a job, a partner, what life is going to be like once you graduate. add to that that this period of your life is often where you get your first real relationships and heartbreaks, and it makes for a very hard time. and, it's terribly lonely because it's so romanticised that you can't even say it's hard, or that you're lonely, because This Is The Best Time of Your Life and #yolo.

and, with mia, you add to that the fact that she's broke af. like: she doesn't have money for food. in an environment where everyone around her has money. so, she doesn't want to admit how broke she is, doesn't want to ask for help because there is literally no one who would help her, but the financial stress is killing her. and, i think it's very important to consider that the money harry gives her isn't much to him, but to her - she later owes him her life and her career. the thing about financial precarity is, you can tell people to "pull themselves up by their bootstraps" all you want, the staple of financial precarity is that you're one major expense away from a catastrophe. people are maintained in poverty because what is a small expense to someone with financial security (say: having to fix the lights on your car for instance) can throw someone else in a cycle of debt that they'll never get out of. the money harry gives her is just enough that she's able to get her head above water, and while he always says it's not about the money - to her, that makes a huge difference. because, she's not only one major expense away from a catastrophe, she's also one minor donation away from being able to live the life she dreams of. she - quite literally - owes him paris. she owes her career to him choosing to believe in her in that moment when it mattered. could she have done it without it? maybe. but there is a high chance that if he hadn't given her the money, she'd probably have drowned, given up and gone back to manchester and had a shit job she hated for the rest of her life. that is terribly important. she'll always be grateful to him for helping her out when no one else did.

and, i think the loneliness is also why she and harry connect on such a deep level, because when they meet, he is incredibly lonely too. not in the same relatable, muggle uni ways but: ginny's left, the "buzz" and the elation of the first couple of post-war months have lifted, the press is saying he's gone insane, it's winter, it's dark, wet. he says it himself when they first sleep together in chapter 5:

Mia dances close; Harry mostly watches, but at around three in the morning, they share another taxi home. The fact that they live in the same building could have been a good excuse, Harry thinks, except that by that point, they don’t really need one. He’s already kissed her, trailed his fingers up her thighs in the club (loud music, smoke; he managed to just smile and not think) so it’s not exactly a surprise when he follows her down the stairs to her flat instead of going up to his. He kind of hates himself for the thought but to be honest, it’s been over two months since he’s last had sex and well, she’s offering.

it's kind of tragic but being "there" and "offering" is most of her appeal, at that point in time. and, it's in reaction to those who aren't there and offering. and so, in those months, they bring each other so much. and of course, it grows into something that is much more than loneliness-bonding. again, to mia, harry is the one who shows her her father is an arsehole. he's the one who believes in her when no one else does. he shows her she can trust people. i think the fact that he insists he cares about her, and will always care about her, even when they're not together, means the world to her. she's never had anyone like that in her life. and, in a strange way, by being an - objectively - shitty boyfriend, he teaches her to stand up for herself. because, not only is she terribly lonely, she's also such a people-pleaser that she never pulls anyone up on their shitty behaviour. she doesn't resent her friends (see above), or her dad, or her mum. when harry says this in chapter 15, it really matters:

‘You’re brilliant,’ he just said, instead. His voice cracked and he felt tears clouding his vision, closed his eyes for a moment. ‘You deserve so much better than this.’ She looked down to her lap, then back up to him. ‘Better than him or better than you?’

the question is rhetorical here and they both know it. harry is important to her development as a character because at the end, he allows her to be like: yeah, i fucking deserve better than you people. for her, that's huge.

but then, in a strange way, i do think she's rather nostalgic about it. because i think she really did love him and just wishes things had gone differently. because again, he's the one person who cared about her when no one else did and that's hard to let go of. i think she - again - has very conflicted feelings about it, which do filter through in the paris fic.

that said, to answer your question (I wonder if harry actually thinks about her and regrets their relationship for actually hurting her): yes, he does. i think that's part of his character evolution too. he knows he Fucked Up and it sucks. he feels very guilty about it. that's why he agrees to be the 'bad guy' in the end, when she basically asks him to break up with her because she can't, and then does it in the most godawful way. he takes responsibility for his behaviour, which is also very important to his character arc. it's very hard to navigate your late teens/early twenties without hurting someone without meaning to. what matters is how you react and own up to it. he struggles, acts like a complete douchebag, but in the end, he owns it. he gives her the story she needs to move on and be like: yes, he cared about me, but he was also an arsehole. he gives her that:

She met a boy who slept with her on and off for eight months and broke her heart, dumped her after sex and punched her father in the face. It's not a lie.

in a very strange way, that's an act of love and care too. it might not be enough for her to completely get over him or forget him, but it does allow her to have mixed feelings and hang onto the fact that she deserves better, which is already a lot.

but yeah, of course he feels guilty. he even says so himself in 15 & 16:

(xv) They talk about Mia, that night. Not that he brings it up, but in light of what Gwenog Jones said, he actually asks if she regrets the dating and the going out. There is no judgement in his voice, he’s just curious, and she says: ‘I don’t know, it’s complicated.’ She asks if he regrets Mia and he wants to laugh - same, yeah. He wonders if perhaps, these were the mistakes they needed to make.

(xvi) It’s a fair question, of course. How he feels about Mia. A couple months have passed. Water, bridges and all that. ‘Still a bit guilty, I think,’ he admits. Winces. ‘You?’ ‘Still a bit jealous, I think.’

so, yeah, regarding how ginny feels: of course, she feels a bit jealous. because she knows that he loved mia and cared about her. and, ginny herself slept around, sure, but love wasn't part of the equation. if you remember, she tried to date someone (early on - from october to january of '98) who she did like (but not yet love) and even told harry about, but then that blew up in her face so spectacularly that feelings never really crystallised. (sidenote: i actually think the matt incident probably had even more of an impact on her than sleeping around because this was the first person she ever put her trust in that wasn't harry (post-amycus) and he dumped her in an extraordinarily dickish way (blamed her for the press, which she couldn't control) and that is also what triggered her to be like: fuck this, they say i'm a slut, might as well be one sort of attitude --- but i digress).

it was really important for me that they both have pasts and insecurities about their respective pasts because -- well, that's part of any relationship, isn't it? like, you should never let it eat you up, but it's normal to feel a bit awkward and insecure about your partner's past at the start of the relationship. and, also about yourself. you really want this to work and not fuck it up. so, like: harry feels shitty about treating mia like shit because he didn't mean to. he feels a bit insecure about the fact that ginny's been with a lot of people before him, and doesn't want to admit it. he feels insecure about whether or not she loves him because she's dumped him once before and, well. she feels insecure because everyone thinks she's a slut and she worries he does too. she feels insecure about the fact that he used to love someone else.

but, the important part is: they talk about it. and, that's how they grow and act adult, and that is what matters. the insecurities are obviously there, but they chat and reassure each other and that's what grown-ups do. it even comes up during the sex in 16 and i love how they deal with it:

‘Merlin, that was -’ she laughs. He laughs, too. ‘Much better than last summer,’ she adds.  He’s got this stupid, self-satisfied, Cheshire cat smile across his face when she finally turns to look at him, so large it’s probably rather obscene, and a stupid (stupidstupid) thought suddenly hits his brain: I’ve had time to practice. He doesn’t say it, but she must bloody read it in his eyes because suddenly, a flash of recognition washes over and he wants to say something - anything - to take back that cringey, gauche thing he hasn’t even fucking said, and he wants to disappear deep - far - into the ground. He thinks back to their conversation at the restaurant, and: ‘Still a bit jealous, I think,’ - it makes his skin crawl. Now, though, Ginny laughs. At him, mostly. ‘Harry,’ she says. ‘Harry, look at me.’  Reluctantly, he does. ‘It’s fine,’ she whispers. ‘Just kiss me.’

there's acceptance there, and love, and trust, and that's what matters.

to anwer your other question: Are ginny and harry sorry that they kissed when harry was in a relationship with mia?

honestly, no, i don't think so, though. i think the kiss is the least of it. it's not about one kiss. it's about Everything Else, really.

regarding mia herself, she might make a cameo at a later date. not saying more. but i don't think she'll come back regularly. she needs to be away from him. she says so herself but this isn't the kind of break up where they can stay friends. it would kill her.

lastly, regarding her father (And what about her father? Will that dickhead ever come back to his senses and treat his gem of a daughter the way she deserves?): i headcanon she goes no-contact with him. you can of course hc different things but imo, that's one toxic relationship she lets go of. she knows harry was right there, and i think she's thankful to him for showing that to her, too.

so, in sum: i think mia moves on. i think she has a great life. i also think her love story and harry are always somewhere in her mind. like everything in castles, it's complicated.

[ardent-fox]

✨ Tag Game Master Post ✨

Hi, all! Catching up on these two games I was tagged in during the holidays 💖

First up, thank you to the lovely @lupeloto for creating and tagging me in this fun Tag Game! 🥰

📺 Favorite tv show? At the moment, Our Flag Means Death (shields self from tomatoes being thrown at her 😁)

🕴️ Favorite character? Oof, this is difficult. Gonna have to go with my precious baby boy, Stede

💋 Favorite relationship in the show? Blackbonnet (shocking, I know)

👯‍♂️ Fav sibling relationship in the show? No blood relations but the entire crew is chosen family, so… all of them?

🎨 Favorite art form? Music, with a heavy focus on lyrics/words

⚡️ A talent you wish you had? Being able to draw would be cool

☀️ What is one thing that can always make your day better? My toddler nephew saying the most hilarious things, he's barely 3 and already the funniest person I know

🎬 Favorite fictional character of all time? Atticus Finch (any works he appears in besides To Kill a Mockingbird do not count)

🌅 Dream place to travel to? Thailand or Ireland (either "land" would do, get it? 🧍‍♀️ ...I'll see myself out)

🎈 You’re planning a huge party, what’s the theme? The Masque of the Red Death, get fancy and spooky, bitches 🎭💀

🍕 Favorite pizza topping of all time? All kinds of cheese and extra mushrooms

🥂 You can pick ONE celebrity to have dinner with… Who? Andrew Garfield, {Marge Simpson voice} I just think he's neat

🎥 Favorite movie that you kinda know is bad but you still love? Rocky Horror Picture Show 👄

👖 How would you describe your style? The "I gained a substantial amount of weight in the past 5 years and haven't bought anything new since, so I now wear whatever I can fit into and lots of dresses and skirts cause pants are uncomfortable and shopping for them is a nightmare" style 😬

🖤 Finally, something making you smile this week? My mom's reaction to a present she really wanted, seeing her that touched was soul ascending ✨

----

Next, I got tagged by @deedala, @tanktopgallavich, @suzy-queued and @lupeloto to complete this round of Weekly Tag Wednesday, thank you my darlings! 💙

Name: Lyds

Location: Unknown location in Europe

Astrological Sign: Taurus squaaaad ♉

What's a TV show or movie you plan to re-watch this year? Hubby has never seen Giant, so I'll be rewatching it soon as well as some other classics like Some Like It Hot and Philadelphia Story, I'm sure I'll rewatch Frankie and Johnny for the umpteenth time as well. As far as shows go, I rewatch Our Flag Means Death at least once a month since it's my comfort show, and might do a Shameless rewatch since I've only seen the whole thing once (excluding all the Gallavich scenes)

What's a book or fic you will probably re-read this year? The entirety or The Menagerie by @crossmydna and Honeycomb by @metalheadmickey with artwork by @heymrspatel 💕

What is a song you will likely continue to play on repeat? I've been replaying One Of Your Girls by Troye Sivan for days and don't plan on stopping anytime soon, also still listening to Hozier's entire Unreal Unearth album whenever I'm chilling

What's a tasty treat you look forward to eating more of this year? Gonna steal Ri's answer here and say cinnamon buns, as well as my husband's homemade pizza rolls that I previously mentioned, as they're our favorite thing to eat while binge-watching

What's a time sink that you will continue to sink time into this year? Scrolling this beloved hellsite

Did you pick up any habits in 2023 that you plan to continue? Only unhealthy ones that I plan on ridding myself of in 2024 👋

What's your toxic trait? Inflexibility and freaking out when things don't turn out the way I've planned

What is a coping mechanism you will continue to indulge in this year? Staying in my burrow with my hyperfixations

Tell me something you like about how you look! My full, rosy lips against my smooth, pale skin

Give me at least three adjectives describing things you like about yourself. Honest, open-minded, creative 🌸

I'm out of the loop (which is about to change since I celebrated the last of the festivities today) and haven't been keeping up with the tags lately, but am still going to tag some peeps if you want to do either or both of these: @heymrspatel, @stocious, @too-schoolforcool, @xninetiestrendx, @krysmiss, @sleepyfacetoughguy, @michellemisfit, @whatwouldmickeydo, @vintagelacerosette, @metalheadmickey, @rereadanon, @francesrose3, @darlingian and anyone who sees this and wants to play! ✨

[siriuslysatorusimping]

Super proud of you for getting out and doing things! Most people don't realise quite how hard that is to do with agoraphobia. I'm happy to see that you're out and doing things! And its been amazing watching you/hearing about how you're claiming your life back from your ex. And I can't wait to see where life takes you next!

Thank you! 🥹 I hope you and your little man are doing well!! My best friend's baby is getting so big, and it's still crazy to me that she's a mom 😳

Agoraphobia is no joke at all. I used to love getting out of the house, and now the very thought of it can absolutely paralyze me. It's been a struggle, I won't lie. There are so many days that I just can't get myself to leave the house for anything, even though I need to go do something. But I'm letting myself embrace the small victories because sometimes that's all it takes. Last week, I let myself be proud of the fact that I got out to pick up a prescription, even though I really didn't want to.

I ranted and I'm so sorry 😭😭 It's below the cut for those who are interested 😬

THANK YOU FOR YOUR MESSAGE!! 💕 I APOLOGIZE FOR BEING MIA AROUND HERE LATELY. AND THAT I HAVEN'T UPDATED ANYTHING IN SO LONG 😭 BUT THANK YOU FOR STILL BEING HERE!

As for taking my life back from my ex? I'm reconnecting with a few old friends and getting closer to my family again. When I was in college and grad school, I talked to my mom almost every single day. That stopped when I started dating my ex-husband. My mom admitted to me that she had stopped calling me because she realized that he and I typically fought after we talked, and she didn't want to make things worse for us by calling to check on me. It made me really sad to hear that my mom was afraid to talk to me because she thought that my husband would get angry. But now, I talk to her at least once a week, sometimes multiple times a week, and she's been so supportive and let me know how proud she is of me for each little step I take. I don't know what I'd do without her.

I've lost a few friends, which makes me a bit sad, but they're the people who believe the lies my ex-husband tells them, so I've realized that I don't need them in my life.

I made the realization a couple weeks ago that I was always anxious and exhausted around him because I had to mask my autism constantly. He got really upset when I stopped masking and would make comments about how he missed the 'old me.' I was quite literally not safe to be myself in my own home when he was around because he didn't love me for who I was; he loved the idea of having a wife who did exactly what he said to do and never disagreed with him for any reason. The more I began to discover about myself and my AuDHD, the more he would say he missed the way I was when we first met: a hyper-anxious, depressed, undiagnosed AuDHD doormat.

Life is still rough. Finances are very tight because I ended up keeping the expensive rent, which wasn't so bad with two incomes but is very rough with just one. I also had to get a lawyer to help me with what should have been a simple divorce since we had no kids or assets, but he made it as difficult as he could. So, I also have a lot of lawyer debt I'm working to pay off. But, as my therapist and I agreed, it was a small price to pay to never have to speak to my ex-husband again.

Where will life take me next? Building a savings, and then, hopefully, traveling. My ex-husband didn't know how to save, or budget. We had quite literally no savings because he just wouldn't stop spending. So I'm trying to build up an emergency fund again, which I haven't had since before getting married.