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vrishchikawrites · 4 years ago

Note

Are you still taking prompts?

Cause if so, I'd love to see a time travel fic where post-canon WWX and LWJ get yeeted back into their younger bodies, and land just before the GC transfer. And Post-Canon WWX - who's had some years of being a part of a loving, supportive family, in a non-toxic, non-abusive environment; and therefore no longer has any misconceptions about how much the Jiangs were not his family - takes one look at JC lying there on the table in the cave after WQ knocked him out (and is now in the middle of prepping for surgery); and just goes, "LOL, yeah; nope.😆 Been there, done that; 10/10, would not recommend.😝 Hey, WQ - change of plans!😎"

(Except, you know, not written like crack. 😉)

Not necessary to include, but a fun idea:

JC gets dragged along to the past as well because he has WWX's GC; so whatever sent them back mistook him for part of WWX and brought him along.

So when he wakes up from the anaesthesia, he freaks out about not having a GC anymore. And WWX has this whole story ready to tell young JC about how, "Oops, sorry; you can't have a new GC after all" - but this is Post-Canon JC; so he knows about the transfer, and knows that this means that WWX decided not to do it again.

Which means he ends up screaming at WWX about, "How dare you not give me your GC!"

So WWX feels exactly zero sympathy.

(Before that happened he was maybe feeling a little bit bad for young JC; because that JC hadn't done anything too bad yet - but he already knew how it would turn out if he went through with it. And he was not giving up his chance to cultivate to immortality with his hubby; just so that JC could Feel Like A Real Man, and go on to murder his way through life again.)

What would be really, really great about this, is if WWX had brought JC to Qinghe or Gusu; or somewhere the other cultivation sects involved in the SSC had gathered, before JC woke up. Planning to leave him there where he would be safe. So when JC wakes up and starts screaming, everybody hears him.

And they're all like, "...WUT."🤤

"You expected him to do what?!?"😲😨😱

So instead of all the sympathy and compassion, etc, that he would have gotten over what happened at LP (that he probably did get the first time), or for losing his GC; basically the entire allied cultivation world as a whole is collectively side-eyeing him.

IDK; I just think it would be really funny.

But mainly, I just want to see WWX a few years post-canon; having the chance to do it all again, and choosing not to go through with the GC transfer. LWJ going with him is because the thought of post-canon LWJ losing his WWX makes me sad; and I want them to stay together. 😋

Post-Canon JC going back and getting stuck with the coreless body he deserved is just for my own catharsis.

(The rest of that idea is simply for the lulz.) 😉

(I decided not to include JC traveling back in time. Hope this works and satisfies you!)

“No, I don’t.” Wei Wuxian sees Wen Qing blink and stare at him while Wen Ning stills in the process of making Jiang Cheng comfortable.

“What?” Wen Qing asks but rethinks it immediately, “No, no need to answer that.” She starts packing away her instruments immediately like she’s glad that Wei Wuxian has changed his mind. He looks at her and feels aching fondness rise in his chest. She must be frustrated that he made her go through all of that trouble and yet she still chooses to move before he can change his mind again.

“What… are we going to tell Jiang-gongzi?” Wen Ning asks tentatively but Wei Wuxian notes the faint look of relief in the boy’s eyes.

“We’ll tell him the treatment wasn't possible,” He says, glancing at his… former shidi. It isn’t an easy decision to make, because he knows Jiang Cheng would suffer for it. A part of him feels like he’s being unnecessarily cruel by denying Jiang Cheng his core.

But he has already paid his debt and it cost countless people their lives. Jiang Cheng’s actions didn’t just lead to the death of the Wens. Lan Zhan had told him about the numerous ‘demonic cultivators’ Jiang Cheng had pursued relentlessly. Even his love wasn’t certain how many people died or were tormented to insanity because of Jiang Cheng’s persistence.

While Wei Wuxian doesn’t intend to let the situation get so out of hand, it is apparent that Jiang Cheng can’t be trusted with power.

He is worried about how Jiang Cheng would react. Wei Wuxian had promised him a core, after all. But whatever happens, a powerless Jiang Cheng is safer for everyone.

“We’ll tell him that rebuilding the core is impossible because Wen Zhuliu destroyed his meridians as well.”

“He has,” Wen Qing points out, “I was about to repair them.”

Wei Wuxian frowns, “And can you repair them still? Without transferring the core?” That would certainly help Jiang Cheng heal faster and accept some spiritual energy transfusions. Wen Qing looks at Jiang Cheng with a frown and nods.

“Wei-gongzi… what changed your mind?” Wen Ning asks as Wen Qing goes to work immediately. Wei Wuxian knows that if he has to help the Wens, he needs to tell them the truth. While Wen Ning would trust him and accept his explanation without too many questions, Wen Qing wouldn’t be so easy.

Wei Wuxian takes a deep breath and closes his eyes, getting his thoughts in order. When he opens them again, both of the Wens are looking at him with frowns.

He grins wryly and spreads his hands, "I have a tale for you, my dear friends."

Jin Guangyao needed to have his last 'hurrah'. He just couldn't leave them be, even as he died. Whatever he did, whatever tool he used, it sent a shockwave of Resentful Energy that would've killed them all.

As always, Wei Wuxian stepped forward to protect people. As always, Lan Wangji stepped forward to protect him.

Wei Wuxian gritted his teeth and changed his plan at the last moment. At first, he wanted to absorb the energy and channel it somewhere else. But with so many people just lingering instead of running, he needed a different solution.

His mind flashed, he saw Jiang Cheng, and decided.

A forbidden array formed.

"I needed something that would use up all of the Resentful Energy and protect everyone, including Lan Zhan."

"So, at the last moment and on the verge of dying, you chose something as improbable as time travel." Wen Qing deadpans. Wen Ning is looking at him with wide eyes. Strangely enough, both look like they believe him. Well, he did mention a few things, personal incidents, that he had no way of knowing if the Wens hadn't told him.

Still.

"I'm not the one for regrets," He says softly as he looks at Jiang Cheng, "But I thought that array was the safest solution. It doesn't harm the current timeline so everyone is safe. Lan Zhan, I know, wouldn't mind following my lead in this." He did regret taking Zewu-jun's brother away from him after such a traumatic event but there really was no other option. Not with Jin Ling so close and so many innocent people in the vicinity.

Wei Wuxian is quite certain that the blast would've destroyed everything around them, including the innocent people around the Guanyin Temple complex.

The siblings exchange glances before Wen Qing returns to Jiang Cheng's side, preparing to work on his meridians, "You're going to change things." She observes, "Save people?"

"Save you and Wen Ning. Save Jiang Yanli. Save innocents, yes."

Wen Qing freezes.

---

Lan Wangji doesn't know what Wei Ying did but he trusts his beloved. When he finds himself in the past, just before the Sunshot Campaign begins and shortly after the fall of the Lotus Pier, he doesn't hesitate.

He knows that his brother is safe and his uncle is managing things at Cloud Recesses. But he also knows that somewhere out there, his beloved is preparing himself for a risky, painful procedure.

Wangji can't let that happen. He thinks back on everything Wen Ning shared with him about the incident, particularly the location of where it occurred. He's probably too late to stop the transfer but perhaps not late enough to stop the Wens from finding Wei Ying.

It takes him days to reach Yiling without the aid of Bichen but he manages and immediately heads towards the approximate location Wen Ning had mentioned.

"Wei Ying," He breathes softly when he spots his beloved shopping for some supplies. He hadn't anticipated finding him so soon but is grateful nonetheless.

Wei Ying is dressed like a peasant and blends in well with the people around him but Wangji can recognize him anywhere.

Dressed discreetly and without his forehead ribbon, Wangji too is inconspicuous. He moves swiftly towards Wei Ying and catches his elbow, eyeing the people in red and white uniform at the far end of the street warily.

"Come." He whispers.

Wei Ying doesn't say a word, just paying the vendor and following Wangji into a more discreet location.

Wangji looks at his beloved's face, drinking in his bright silver eyes and sharp features with acute relief.

"Wei Ying, you… you look well." Strangely so, for someone who has just given up his Golden Core.

Hope stirs in his chest and Wangji reaches for Wei Ying's wrist.

His love's lips quirk in amusement, but Wangji ignores him, focusing on sending his spiritual energy through Wei Ying's meridians.

A strong core pulses in response.

"Wei Ying," Something bright and triumphant burns in his chest and he resists the urge to pull his beloved into a crushing embrace.

He would've supported Wei Ying's decision to give up his core and cultivate with resentful energy again. He knew it wasn't evil or harmful now.

But Wei Ying chose himself. His beloved had finally chosen to save himself.

"Aiya, Lan Zhan!" Wei Ying laughs, "If you keep looking at me like that, I'll do something quite shameless and embarra-"

Wangji kisses him.

He cups that precious face, pulls him close, and slides his lips over soft flesh in a tender expression of love he can't contain.

Wei Ying chose himself.

---

Jiang Cheng returns from his trip to the mountain with a thunderous expression on his face.

He disregards Lan Zhan and grabs Wei Wuxian's arm in a tough grip, dragging him away from the crowded tea house. Lan Zhan follows without a word, his expression frosty and eyes on Jiang Cheng.

"Your Grandmaster," He spits, "Is just as useless and worthless as you. All she could do is repair my meridians! My body was too damaged for anything else, she said!"

Wei Wuxian knows Wen Qing wrote the note they left by Jiang Cheng's side but he hadn't known what she had written.

It must've been reasonably convincing for Jiang Cheng to be convinced.

"That's-" He searches his mind to find words that would be appropriately sympathetic. Saying 'that's too bad' would be just rubbing salt on an open wound.

He may dislike Jiang Cheng, but some of the childhood affection still lingers. He doesn't wish to hurt his former shidi.

"I didn't know," He says finally, his heart throbbing in sympathy at Jiang Cheng's devastated expression. He briefly reconsiders his decision but Lan Zhan shifts discreetly by his side and Wei Wuxian remembers why he made that decision in the first place.

Jiang Cheng had been unworthy of the gift he had been given.

His shidi snarls and turns to Lan Zhan, "What are you doing here, Lan er-gonzi," He snarls, "Coming to triumph in our misery?"

Lan Zhan looks at him flatly, "I came to assist Wei Ying."

"Came to assist Wei Ying," Jiang Cheng mocks, his expression tight and furious, "Well, you're welcome to take him away! There's nothing left for him to destroy. Everything is gone. He invited the wrath of the Wens on our heads to protect you and that led to the destruction of my sect. He couldn't even repay that debt. His Grandmaster failed."

Jiang Cheng turns hate-filled eyes towards him, "You are a curse. My father should have left you to rot on the streets!"

"Jiang Wanyin!" Lan Zhan warns but Wei Wuxian places a hand on the Second Jade's arm to halt him.

"I'm taking you to Meishan to be with shijie." Wei Wuxian says calmly, "And then I'll go join the war efforts."

Jiang Cheng sneers before turning his head away, silent.

Wei Wuxian does as he says. He leaves Jiang Cheng in Jiang Yanli's care and heads to Qinghe with Lan Zhan. The war goes differently than before. He manages to kill Wen Zhuliu and Wen Chao early, which gives them a big morale boost. But that's the only thing that goes their way for a long time.

"I'm going to use it," He tells Lan Zhan once, when the scales tip dangerously in the Wen's favor.

Lan Zhan studies him before nodding gracefully, "I will help."

There's no way to avoid using his cultivation method, not if he wants to keep people safe. He's more careful and restrained this time and he doesn't create the Yīn Hǔ Fú. But Mo Dao is Mo Dao. It attracts disapproval from people regardless.

Wei Wuxian doesn't care and Lan Zhan stays by his side without paying any heed to the grumblings of his clan. He goes to sleep every night with Lan Zhan's guqin notes in his ear and meditates every morning with the Cleansing purging the Resentful Energy from his body.

With a powerful and active Golden Core, Wei Wuxian can't use Mo Dao liberally without risking Qi Deviation. But he uses enough to help them win the war.

Wei Wuxian successfully retakes Lotus Pier and Yunmeng from the Wens. Jiang Cheng's hatred doesn't diminish and even Jiang Yanli grows distant after a while. Jiang Cheng's suffering and downfall hardens something in his soft shijie.

Wei Wuxian accepts that consequence quietly.

He hands Lotus Pier back to Jiang Cheng and stays on the front lines, leaving most of the freshly recruited disciples behind to protect his former martial siblings. When the war ends, argues to keep the Wen cultivators in better conditions. He makes sure everyone knows how much the Jiangs owe the Wen siblings, and saves the children and elderly.

With Jiang Cheng out of the Cultivation World and Wei Wuxian's reputation as a war hero, saving the Wen remnants is easier than it had been before.

---

Everyone is baffled when Jiang Wanyin names a new head disciple and Wei Wuxian never returns to Yunmeng. People gossip, sect leaders question, and new Jiang disciple flounder.

Neither Jiang Wanyin nor Wei Wuxian confirms it but it is clear to everyone that the Jiang Sect has, foolishly, kicked out its most powerful disciple. YunmengJiang remains wealthy but the Sect's influence diminishes significantly once Wei Wuxian leaves.

Other Sects, big and small, scramble to find Wei Wuxian, ready to offer him a place and get a powerful cultivator in their ranks. Letters pour in promising wealth and prestige.

Wei Wuxian ignores them all and settles in Cloud Recesses. He's content to teach a group of eye-wide Lan ducklings now to deal with resentful energy and limit the risk of Qi Deviation. He takes them on Nighthunts, teaches them real-life lessons, encourages creativity, and becomes a well-loved senior.

New YunmengJiang disciples aren't near as strong as their predecessors without someone to teach them properly.

People gossip and speculate as the years pass. They hint that he is wrong to leave his former sect behind but he doesn't care.

Wei Wuxian has Lan Zhan and Lan Sizhui. Wen Qing and Wen Ning live happily in a small farming village not far from Gusu. They intervene before Jin Guangyao kills Nie Mingjue. They save Lan Xichen from heartache. Jin Ling is born and has both of his parents.

That's all he needs to be happy.

YunmengJiang is no longer his responsibility.

#short prompts #time travel au #wei wuxian #lan wangji #no golden core transfer #anti jiang cheng

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marindram · 4 years ago

Text

full transcription of Marin's blog from Omega Mart!

huge thanks to @b0chelly for recording a scroll-through, which i typed this out from. (and warning for Omega Mart lore/story spoilers. second half is in reblog)

Marinknows.best

Location: Seven Monolith Village

Last Login: 12/31/2019

Profile Views: 101,275

About me: I love listening to music and glitter

Friends (0)

June 26, 2018

Happy Birthday to meeeeeeeeee!

So 14 feels way different than 13. For real. I think it's because I was expecting 13 to feel different, but sometimes when you expect something it turns out the opposite ya know?

Plus, 13 is like, "I'm new to being a teenager!!"

14 is more like, "I'm becoming the person I want to be." At least that's how I want it to be. I wanted to start this blog as a record of all that.

I should ask Did you guys feel the same way when you turned 13 and 14?

But probably nobody's gonna read this because I'm just a weirdo in the weird dessert. I mean, I know my best friend Jesse is reading this (hi Jesse). Besides her, crickets.

But yeah, if you are reading this and you don't know me - I live in Seven Monolith Village, a teensy tiny town that you've only heard of if you're into aliens or homesteading. And I'm literally stuck. As in, I'm physically unable to leave. My first memories are of all the adults in my life (Charlie, my great-uncle/father-figure - Rose, my what? Roommate? Mother-figure? Pseudo-aunt? All of the above? and my mom, Cecelia. who doesn't live here) telling me that for some reason, there's something wrong with me that makes it so I can't leave a certain radius of where we live. I got older and thought that they were just exaggerating to keep me safe, but then last year I tried. And it was, let's just say not good.

Anyway. That part of my life sucks, but not everything sucks. This year is all about Marin Dram 2.0. Not new, but definitely improved.

And maybe someday, somehow somebody will read this and care about what I have to say. Somebodies, even. Until then, this is Marin Dram signing off and sending my lame contemplations into the void!

July 1, 2018

Things I Want To Do Before I Turn 20 (and some of these will never happen like are literally unable to happen but JUST LET ME DREAM

1. Kiss someone (who???)

2. Meet HTB (kiss him) (jk he would never) (plus meeting him would be enough)

3. Go to Paris

4. Go to Rome (or somewhere cooler in Italy, look up where is the best pasta???)

5. Go to Greenland (why not???)

6. Go to New York City

7. Go to LA (with a dream and my cardigan lol)

8. Go to the Grand Canyon (this isn't mine, but 9, Jesse is sitting right here and she went to the GC when we were 12 and she's like blah blah blah it's my favorite place in the world and you'll love it. I'm doing this so she'll shut up.

9. Live in a normal house with normal rooms → ideally 12 of them: living room AND TV room, kitchen, dining room, 3 bathrooms, 3 bedrooms, study/library.

-plus an upstairs downstairs

-I'm willing to compromise on the number of rooms as long as there's more than ONE for TWO PEOPLE and I got my own

-plus an upstairs/downstairs

-I'm willing to compromise on the number of rooms as long as there's more than ONE for TWO PEOPLE and I get my own room with an actual door. Very into doors.

10. Go to a mall (Jesse says there's a bunch of bonkers ones in Vegas)

11. Make friends who aren't Jesse (no offense, Jesse)

12. Get Cecelia (my "mom") to teach me about business stuff so I can open my own cool coffeeshop/bookstore someday

13. Learn to drive (ask Charlie to teach me, he's obsessed with his truck) (Jesse says she can teach me because she's Little Miss Mechanic and thinks she knows everything about cars but news flash Jesse: you're you get than me)

14. Figure out my signature style- like I want people to send me pictures of things and be like "this just screamed Marin" and for that to be true

15. Liquid eyeliner??

16. I'm stopping here because I just read over all this and want to die/cry because easily 3/4 of these are literally impossible?

17. Kill me

18. Bye

19. Lololol Charlie just came in and I was complaining about this, not being able to leave and stuff, etc and he said that I should visit new places by... reading books?? And I mean I like to read. But dude. That's the dumbest thing I've ever head.

July 30, 2018

Okay so this is what I want my life to look like:

I want a pink room. Not just pink... P I N K. Cool pink wallpaper (floral? jacquard??), pink carpet, lots of pink flowers everywhere, a four-poster bed with a pink silk canopy, lots of cool pink throw pillows. Like, so pink that

people think I'm being sarcastic! Oh, and BOOKS. Floor-to-ceiling bookcases, and some of the shelves have, like, STUFF on them that isn't books, like gifts people gave me, or things I've collected on my JOURNEYS. You know, normal stuff that people who live on normal places and do normal things have.

If I lived in in this room, it'd be in awhite three-story house at the end of a cul-de-sac (did you know "culs-de-sac" is the plural? Not "cul-de-sacs"? crazy) and I'd wear very classic girly clothes and my hair would always do what I wanted it to. It'd be one of those towns that people call small, but it's actually a city. just one with a kinda small, cozy feeling. Somewhere that gets cold enough to wear cute jackets but not so cold I have to to like, shovel my driveway. Not a non-place with like 100 people where you can't even go outside without going crazy.

August 2nd, 2018

I guess I should explain where I live, for all my avid fans out there! (lol) (hello??)

So like... I don't live on Earth. At least, not the Earth you think of when you think of EARTH. I live in some some weird off-brand version of Earth called the Forked Earth where there are aliens and magic wells of magic energy and everything is MAGIC but like the crappy kind of magic, where the sun never fully rises and some goo called "runoff" has made everything wacky and oh yeah, my mom is responsible for that and everyone here hates her!! LOL

Also, I can't leave! Like, literally can't! Rose says I'm a "special child of Source" and that's why but that LITERALLY explains tells me nothing, in fact it just raises further questions that no one can seem to answer! AHHHHHHHHHH

Anyway, the last time I tried to leave I felt. When I try to leave I feel like I'm being pulled back by something, like you know those old cartoons where someone's on stage doing something dumb and then someone offstage pulls them away with a giant shepard's crook? It felt like that, and when I opened my eyes I was back in 7 Monolith Village. UGH.

I know this sounds crazy!!!!! But believe me when I say that I am the least crazy person here. Also, """here""" is C R A Z Y. Runoff has made everything the bad kind of psychedelic and then people here actually DRINK IT! Not only do I not DRINK THE STUFF THAT HAS MADE THE WORLD INSANE, I also do not talk to aliens (or whatever Nula are) like Rose or believe crazy conspiracy theories like Charlie, so I believe that qualifies me as the most normal person in the Forked Earth, thank you for this honor, I accept this award with humility and grace!

September 4, 2018

I had the weirdest dream last night?? I was swimming in a pool full of cereal, and when I came up for air, my mom was pouring milk on my head like she was rinsing my hair. She had her hand over my face like I was a little kid and she was shielding me from soap getting in my eyes.

Anyway I have no idea what it's supposed to mean. I went to bed hungry and I need to take a shower? Lol

October 16, 2018

I was trying to hide this entry from Jesse, but JESSE IS A NOSY PERSON. She says that blogs are for readers, and if I wanted something to be private then I should "Just write in a fucking notebook and hide it under your bed like a normal person, Marin." I'm allowed to have secrets!! Anyway, I'm making her a freaking playlist, that's why I wouldn't tell her what I was writing about. but EVEN STILL! I'm allowed to have secrets!! But I have this blog because I wanna get my feelings out, I wanna see everything in my head typed out all nice in a way that doesn't make it look insane. You know? I don't know who I'm asking.) Because, it's not like I go to a normal school or have a normal life where I'm surrounded by normal people I can talk to. No one knows about me! I'm trapped in this crazy place and This blog is my only outlet to the world outside. I KNOW that's heavy but it's true! The point is: Jesse's birthday is coming up. The central consistent thing in pretty much my whole life is sharing headphones with her and listening to music. The soundtrack to my entire existence is her. I wish I had money and could buy her the best presents of all time, but I can make her the best playlist of all time. I want it to be so good it feels like magic. I want her to think I'm magic. I had another dream the other night. I don't remember much, just glitter. I must be crafting too much. Or looking at festival makeup tutorials. Or both.

November 12, 2018

WARNING- Weird thoughts ahead, lol.

I can never tell which feelings are normal, and which are me being a giant weirdo. But for as long as I can remember, I've had this feeling like every part of my body that's possible to have a ribbon tied around it, has a ribbon tied around it. It's so weird. I can't see the other end of the ribbons - how far they go. where they're attached, nothing. And sometimes it's fine, because sometimes I can hardly feel them. I can forget about them for days at a time, weeks, months if I'm lucky. But then other times I can feel them like, pulling at me. It's freaking spooky, to have something pulling at you from somewhere you can't see. I can't tell if it's pulling me toward whatever it is? Or if it's trying to warn me? Or if I'm just insane??

Does that make sense? Does anybody else feel that way? (she asks into the void)

So idk I guess this ribbons-feeling is why I'm really careful all the time. Like I'm just a careful person. Charlie tried to give me a hard time about it, and I can't be like "I don't wanna pull back in the ribbons too hard without realizing it and wreck something!" because he'd be like "WTF Marin, do we need to get you help?" But also, more and more, I want to be the opposite of careful. I want to take a pair of comically oversized scissors and cut the ribbons into so many pieces that nobody can even tell what they are any more.

I don't know why I'm such a freak, only that I am. I don't know why I can't leave 7 Monolith, only that I can't. But there must be a reason, even if I can't see it, and I feel like it makes sense that the ribbons-feeling is part of that reason, right?

There's just a lot.

January 15, 2019

Happy new year! Lol I forgot to write on the actual first day of 2019, but OH WELL!

I got this new glitter nail polish, thanks to the monthly makeup subscription box my "mom" sends me as an outlet for her abandonment guilt. It has like, every color glitter imaginable without quite reading as "rainbow" which is fine just not really what I was in the mood for and it's vaguely halographic and shifts into all these different colors depending on the light. I'm obsessed. Anyway.

I was putting on another layer because I chipped it like 20 minutes into wearing it, and all of a sudden I had this feeling like I recognized the glitter? Like I felt this thing way deep in my gut and for a minute I couldn't breathe. It's the closest thing I've felt to how books and movies make Christmas look. Like I was home, with family, cookies and cider and all that stuff. Familiar and safe. I almost didn't recognize that feeling. And it came from the nail polish. How weird is that.

I mean, I don't want to make it sound like I've had this awful Charles Dickens childhood - Rose and Charlie are the best ever and always there for me and I love them a lot. But things never feel like...home. You know?

My mom always says this cryptic stuff about how I'm "special" and I wanna strangle her because I'm not, but you try getting my mom to stop doing anything she wants to do. Rose told me once that one day, I would "lead the charge into a new era of existence and access" because I'm "of the Source" and I was like uhhhh okay?? Charlie mostly treats me pretty normal, except when I ask him questions about our family. my mom or any Dram. He knows that I want to know more about them and he's my only real entrypoint, but apparently he's like the black sheep of that whole family. He and my mom were close way back right before I was born, but now whenever she comes to visit he barely even looks at her.

So that's to say: nobody tells me anything, ever.

January 16, 2019

Okay this is so weird. I wrote that entry yesterday about glitter and then last night I dreamed about glitter. Then I woke up with purple glitter in my bed?? Like not a lot, so at first I thought it was from my nail polish, but it was just a handful of purely purple glitter that looks nothing like my nail polish. SO WEIRD!!!!!!

February 14, 2019

Rose has an old book full of "ye olde" style fairy tales, and I flipped through it for the first time in forever today.

Not so weirdly, I've always been drawn to the story of Rapunzel.

Rapunzel couldn't leave the tower, or else she'd break her neck and die.

Same.

February 19, 2019

I was reading this article the other day in one of the teen magazines my "mom" gets me a subscription to and it was all about body positivity, which is great, but it was basically just like "wear a crop top if you wannna wear a crop top! it doesn't matter what size you are! You go, girl!" And like, sure. Yes. I am all for that. But doesn't it seem like there are some steps missing in there? Like, I can physically put on a crop top and wear it outside. But how do I convince myself that everybody isn't looking at me and making fun of me in their minds? How do I unlearn the last almost-fifteen years? How do I get actually positive about my body, not just put on a crop top and fight the urge to cry all day?

It's the same thing like when my mom sends me brochures from the CEO camp she ten when she was my age (her dad started the camp for her, which is an insane thing just by itself, but she did all the work, which is even more insane) and she's like "Marin, you lack direction for your life" and I'm like, cool mom. Yeah. I can see that. What I can't see is how to get there from here.

March 2, 2019

This is what I want my life to look like, volume 2:

The walls of my room are covered in Polaroids of me and my friends. There are lots of mirrors in all kinds of shapes. hearts and moons and stars. There's a record player and a lot of vintage records by Billie Holiday and Lena Horne and Peggy Lee and Nina Simone. And Christmas lights! Everywhere! Lots of of pink and purple Christmas lights everywhere.

If I lived in this room, I'd have so many friends and be part of so many clubs. My best friend would have a collection of vintage cameras, and every place we go to that has a photo booth, we'd get photos taken. Every time I'd look at myself in one of those mirrors, I'd feel happy at what I see and never weird or sad. (Jesse hates taking pictures, so even when I actually do normal stuff with her there's no evidence. What even is a life supposed to be without evidence? That's not an actual question you need to answer Jesse, it's just a question)

Anyway, if I lived in this kind of room, my mom would probably be like, an art history professor at a liberal arts college. That's how come everything looks so cool, because I would know stuff about art. My mom and I would love to try new recipes together. We get each other new cookbooks for every special occasion, and right now we're working out way through a Moroccan one. Moroccan Mondays.

In actuality, there's a dust storm happening outside and my eyes sting.

March 9, 2019

Here's what I'm obsessed with lately.

Can. You. EVEN???

February 3, 2020

Omg I totally forgot this blog existed!!

I lost the password and instead of just resetting it I got in one of my super stubborn moods (Taurus moon lol) and just kept putting in guesses and jokes on me, it locked me out. Anyway, that's a boring story.

But my friend Ximena is really good at hacking and stuff, so she got me back in. Yeah you read that right - I have friends. Obviously a lot has happened since my last post. Ximena moved out here a couple months ago (X's family used to live here but they moved away a while ago) and she introduced me to Lora who I sorta-not-really already knew, and Jesse and I have been hanging out with them a ton. Jesse kind of more than me. Which is fine!!

Anyway I'm 15 now? If I lived somewhere normal I'd be psyched about almost being 16, because I'd get a car and have a Sweet Sixteen and eat a huge PINK cake, but I don't!

February 16, 2020

I read this fanfic the other night that was written in the second person so everything was like "you." "you're doing this" etc you know?

So... You go to a drive-in movie with Heartthrob Boy, and he spills soda on you by accident. And you take off your shirt ( you have a tank top on, don't worry) to clean it up, bit you're still all sticky and self-conscious about being sticky and HTB like... used his tongue to get it off??? AAHHHHH I'M DISGUSTING

but also I wonder if a boy will ever touch any part of me with his tongue

March 2, 2020

Hi I don't know if you heard but I have friends :)))

March 15, 2020

I think I'm so into painting my nails and doing my hair because those are things that always fit. I don't have to worry about places not carrying about a size 8, or places that carry XLs but when you read the measurements they're actually size 8s too and it's like jesus if that's an XL what am I

My "mom" was confused why I needed new pants because mine still look new, but I showed her the thigh holes and she was like "that's a weird place for a hole, how did that happen" and I realized that when your legs are a certain size, you just don't know about thigh rub and what it does to clothes. Pants could just last for years.

No matter what, I can paint my nails with a different color nail polish on every finger, and I can always do a braid crown. And I know I'm cute as hell, etc, so this is not a Marin Needs to Learn to Love Herself thing. It's just an UGH thing

April 17, 2020

So Rose does all these Source experiments on plants and flowers and stuff. Tbh, it's just one if those things I hardly even register anymore because it's just always there. She's explained to me a million times what Source is/does/means, but the way Rose explains things sometimes is just a LOT to take in and she refers to me as a "child of Source" but I kinda figure that's like "child of God" right? What else would that mean?

But anyway, it's really annoying because dried flowers are a part of my new aesthetic and I pinned a bunch of them up on my wall but I woke up this morning to a freaking jungle of very alive flowers. I freaked out. on Rose, and she Rose said she didn't do it and I was like WELL THEN WHO DID and she said that I did??

Which like. Obviously that doesn't make sense. I asked her what she meant and She just shook her head and said " It's happening. We should have known" which is some horror movie shit that she refused to elaborate on. I love to feel safe and normal!!

Or maybe it's not a horror movie at all. But maybe it's a superhero movie? Maybe there's some kind of origin story I don't know about yet, and all of this will be worth it once I figure out my powers. I wonder what my costume will look like. Lol.

April 23, 2020

Is it possible to die from longing? I know that sounds melodramatic, but I'm also kinda serious?? Because it seems like one of those things that could fester and get infected and kill you. It's like when you fall down and bang up your knee, and you need to put a band-aid on the scrape for a while, but THEN you need to air it out - but how do you know when you're supposed to do each one of those things? And if you do either one too much, your knee gets infected. What if I smother my heart with band-aids for too long and it gets infected? This isn't about anybody. I just keep having these dreams about someone I never expected to have dreams about and they're so intense that they keep leaking into my life and I wonder if I need to do something about them.

May 2, 2020

So Jesse's gotten really into metal music, and I tried to get her to play me something since, AS PREVIOUSLY ESTABLISHED, that's what we've literally ALWAYS DONE with music and each other, and she kinda looked at Ximena out of the corner of her eye and said like "I don't think it's really your thing" And it was the meanest thing anybody's ever said to me.

So later I looked up Zenion, the band she was talking about, and I listened to every single fucking song they've ever recorded turned up as loud as it could go with my own headphones that are better than hers anyway, and I loved it. And I didn't love it just because she said I wouldn't. I loved it because it was loud and weird and wild and when I listened to it it made me feel like it's not crazy when so feel stuff so hard it's like my heart's gonna vibrate out of my body. And I would have told Jesse all this and we could have shared it, but I guess she thinks just because I like HTB and glitter and stuff, I don't have the capacity for anything else.

She clearly doesn't know me at all. So much for any kind of whatever, why would she ever want to kiss someone she clearly sees as like a stupid baby.

May 7, 2020

The dreams are getting weirder and they're happening more. I'm getting scared to go to sleep. Not that the dreams are always scary (they almost never are, or not scary like in a typically scary horror movie way). I mean, I've only ever been me. I don't know what other peoples' dreams are like.

The other night in one I was jumping on a trampoline, which is something I've never done in real life. I told Rose about it when I woke up, and she said "do you even know how to jump on a trampoline?" and I said "Rose, it's not like riding a bike. You don't have to learn. You just jump." and then we got into this whole thing about how some things we just know, and jumping's one of them, and how that's so weird. Sometimes I really like talking to Rose about stuff.

May 19, 2020

So, it's prom season in the real world. If I lived somewhere normal, my prom dress would be pink with lots of tulle and silk flowers at the shoulders, and it would fit perfectly and trying in dresses would be fun and not anxiety-inducing.

But since there are only like 10 teenagers currently in 7MV, were not having a homecoming. Cool.

May 27, 2020

So, mom came to visit this weekend, and I asked her about her prom. She was Typical Cecelia at first, very "Prom is a waste of time and money, Marin. It's a night when lesser people play dress-up to engage with their aspirations of grandeur." And I was like eyeroll forever and just stopped talking. BUT THEN she actually talked to me like a human being. She was like, "I actually didn't go to my prom" and when I asked her why she said that she didn't have a date, and was very self-conscious about it. I almost passed out at her admitting that she's ever been anything less than perfect.

(gonna continue this in reblog)

#omega mart #marin dram #omega mart lore

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ifliamsmile · 4 years ago

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Once Upon a Dream - Dick Grayson Imagine (You'll love me at once, The way you did once upon a dream)

pairing: Dick Grayson x Titan! (Preg!Wifey!Reader)

request¹: When Trigon is controlling Dick, he sees Y / n as his wife instead of Dawn. So he tells Y / n what he saw.

request²: Can you write something about Dick and y/n being pregnant and he is protective over her and the baby? Thanks

notes: I joined these two lovely requests together because I thought they fit pretty well I’m so sorry the delay, I’m back at college and doing both is pretty hard but i did my very best. hope you enjoy it xxxx<3 y/e/c: your eye color

y/n/n: your nickname

“Good dreams, big boy.” I said as I put my son to sleep after telling him all the stories he asked me to. John wasn’t a hard-to-deal kid, he reminded me a lot of myself when I was younger, not the bad things, of course, only the good ones, although I wished he could inherit more of Y/n. Looking back at my past doesn’t make me that proud of who I was, but if I admire someone, it surely is my wife.

Heading to our bedroom, I entered, immediately locking my eyes for more than a second with a pair of large, Y/E/C eyes set in a pretty face. Y/N was laying down in our bed, reading her book. It didn’t matter how many times I looked at her, she would always look as beautiful as ever.

“Hey, Boy Wonder.” She greeted me with her specific -and so beloved by me- soft tone of voice.

“Hello, y/n/n” I took my shoes off, sitting in the bed, close to her. Her smell entered my nostrils as I placed a warm kiss on her neck. “How’s our baby and my wife doing?” I caressed her belly, trying to check on our kid as much as I could. Having John four years ago made me way more responsible and careful than I would imagine that I could be someday. Since it, my family had been all I cared for, the hero life didn’t need me as much as they did, or as much as I needed them too.

“We’re doing fine, he didn’t kick me like yesterday so yes..we’re good for today” she told me with a smile on her face. “But my feet, god, they’re killing me”

“Well, I think I can help you on this” I told her with a half smile

“Yeah? Show me how then.” she said and i moved to the end of the bed, sitting with her feet in my laps while i started to massage it.

She left her book on her side, positioning comfortably through the pillows

“I already told you this but..you’re the best husband in the whole world” she said

“I know that, thank you” i said, mocking her

“You’re so sassy, Grayson” we laughed together. I kept doing the massage for ten minutes when, in a matter of a second, we were interrupted by my phone ringing, showing Jason Todd on it’s screen. He was calling for a video call.

I didn’t talk to Jason for ages, what would he want now?

I looked at Y/n and she nodded at me, pointing that I should answer and I did. She got back to read her book while I answered his call, but I knew my wife pretty well to know she was still listening.

“Hey, Jay. Long time no see” I said when his face showed up on the screen. He was different, surely not the same Jason I knew 5 years ago.

“Hey, man, not as good as you, I think.” He answered, showing his legs. He was sitting in a wheelchair, I got perplexed. What the hell did happen to him?

“Jason” I had my hands covering my mouth after passing them through my hair. “What happened?”

“I was stupid. Totally my fault. Riddler and some guys were hitting jewelry stores late at night.” he spoke and I paid attention to every single word “Batman and I staked one out, caught them coming in. Should’ve gone down real simple, but I got too cocky. Big Surprise.” He had his head down, recognizing his mistakes.

“Went straight for him, Though I could take him down on my own. You know the Riddler never uses a gun?”

I nodded at him, it was true, he never did.

“Well, now he does. Bullet hit on my t5 vertebra. I still have it here.”

“Jesus.. I’m so sorry for that.”

“Gotham’s gotten worse, man” He looked at me “Way fucking worse. Commissioner Gordon’s dead.”

“What?” I was completely astonished by what I heard. How the fuck did Bruce let it happen?

“Three days ago. It was the joker, and it was bad. When Bruce finally found where he was. It was too late already.” he said “He’s going to kill the joker”

I felt Y/n’s intrigued eyes on me at this point. She knew Bruce almost too much like I did.

“He would never do that. Bruce has a line he’ll never cross”

“Things have changed, Dick. Alfred Died, I got shot, Commissioner Gordon Died.” Too much information to my own good, I wish I could still be in peace with Yn in bed like I was some minutes ago.

“Why are you telling me all of that now?” I sighed.

“Because you’re the real Robin, man. Not me. He was never the same after you left. Alfred said it. Superman said it. You were the only one he ever listened to. Maybe the only one he cared about after his parents died.” I didn’t answer him this time, it was too much.

“You need to come back to Gotham and convince him not to do it.”

What? Come back to Gotham?

“I can’t. I swore I’d never go back.I haven’t spoke to Bruce in years”

“The whole thing with Tony Zucco. You know what he’s going through. If he does it, there’s no coming back.” I looked back at him “He’s the only hero that Gotham has left.” he sighed “You’re the only one that could save him”

He said and hung up, leaving me with innumerable thoughts, innumerable questions.

I threw my phone at the sofa in front of the bed, getting up and running my hands through my hair.

I felt a pair of arms hugging me from behind

“Dick.” I heard her voice “I’m here.”

“If bruce wants to do something, he’s gonna do it. We both know that.” I said turning around to look at her. “He dresses up like a bat to fight crime. That works for him.” I spoke trying to show her my point of view, it was insane what Jason just told me.

“But this idea that I’m the only one that could save him? It’s bullshit.” I complemented, walking side to side in the room while she was looking calmly at me.

“Then, who?” she just asked

“What?”

“Jim Gordon is dead. Alfred is dead. Barbara’s missing. He fell out with Superman years ago. He’s alone.” She told me, eye to eye.

“He’s always alone, Y/n.”

“Not when you’re around, Dick. How’re you going to feel if you don’t at least try?”

“Bruce Wayne is not my responsibility.” I raised my tone of voice, being hard at what I said. Damn. I knew I had fucked up the minute I said it, so I walked to her.

“I’m sorry.” I hugged her from behind just like she did some minutes ago. “After our baby, if he still hasn’t got shit together, I’ll go. I can’t leave the three of you alone here.”

“Okay.” She said “Oh my god, Dick, he just kicked, he knows we’re talking about’im”

I smiled and moved my hands to her belly in an attempt to feel our son’s kick’s. It was crazy how much my family meant to me, remembering that I always loved Y/n and now, having a life built with her and calling her “wife” is the most peaceful feeling i’ve ever felt.

Our moment was interrupted by a little figure entering our bedroom. It was John with his sleepy face and his teddybear, “Growley” -which one Gar gave to him on his birthday- and we turned our attention to him.

“Hey buddy, couldn’t sleep?” I asked

“Growley wants to go with you.” he told me

“Go where, sweetie?” Y/n asked our older son.

“To Gotham City” He said and I laughed. Did he hear it all?

“Wow. Eavesdropping.” Y/n told me.

“But Growley is your favourite.”

“He’ll protect you.” John said and left, heading to his room, sleeping again.

“Look honey.” Y/n turned to me, putting a hand on my face and I leaned at her touch, closing my eyes, she always had the power to put my shit together when I couldn’t.

“I know that your relationship with Bruce is more than complicated, and that the last time you saw each other you said some things..But he saved you, Dick.”

“What if you’re the only one who can save him back?” I scoff.

“Baby, that’s absurd.” I told her

“But what if?” She asked me.

The next morning I was ready to take a plane to GC. I called Donna to keep here with Y/n until I got back. The bell rang and she was here. Me and Y/n went to receive our old friend.

“Hey Donn” Y/n greeted her.

“I missed you, sister.” The black haired girl answered my wife.

“Hey crazy chick. It’s good to see you. Thank you for coming.” I told her when she came to hug me.

“No problem, don’t worry, I’ll be taking a real good care of these three”

“I don’t doubt it”

We talked to each other and I was ready to leave.

“I’ll be back in a matter of a second, baby, I promise. I’ll have my phone close every time, call me if you need and i’ll be right back.”

“Dick, I’m the one who should be pretty worried by now, and believe me, I am, so please, take care in every moment of this, right?”

"Come on, it’s me. I’m good at this sort of stuff, remember?" I told her with a cocky smile.

We kissed deeply. I gave John a kiss on his head.

“Take care of your mother and your auntie, alright? That’s your mission.”

“Alright, Dad.” he smiled sweetly at me.

“Donn, call me if she feels anything different from normal, any sight of danger and I'll drop everything on Gotham and I'll be back, deal?” Donna nodded at me.

“You’re everything I have. I love you” I said in my wife’s ear, leaving a kiss on her forehead, and leaving.

Gotham was crazy, not the city I knew, the city I left back, this is the closest to hell i’ve ever got to.

I wanted to go back to my family, my pregnant wife, my 4 year old son, my house. But I couldn’t forget that once, Gotham was my home too.

The joker is almost dead. Bruce threw him up from a building and now the police escorted him to a hospital.

I followed to the place that, for a long time, sheltered me. Wayne manor, I needed to talk to Bruce. And I Tried, I told him the joker isn't dead yet and he had a chance to sneak out from darkness. But he didn’t appear so I left.

Although my conscience led me to think I should go back to the better life I chose when I burned my suit, that I should just forget about being Batman’s savior and go back to Y/n, everything kept me stuck on the city. Things happened faster than I could control.

Bruce killed the joker at the hospital. He ran before I could get him, he injured policemen. He didn’t stop at it, he Killed prisoners, nurses, guards. It wasn’t justice, it was a massacre. He couldn’t be saved. He needed to be stopped. I made his name public.

I drove an operation to get him and he killed all my team.

He wanted me to give in to the darkness. To become him.

Well, fuck you, Bruce, you win.

I killed Batman.

“Dick.” Hands on my face and a voice calling my name, it was all I could understand now.

“Dick, It was all planned by trigon” Rachel was at the batcave, where i killed batman. What was she saying? “Dick, you would never kill batman.”

“Shut the fuck up” I told her, I had to kill him.

“You’re the boy from the circus, Dick. We’re supposed to save each other.” She said and we were in my parent’s circus. The flying Graysons, my good memories showed up and I woke up.

“I missed you.”

“Rach” I chuckle.

“Welcome back.” She told me and left to find trigon.

Y/n. Her face filled my mind. Wasn’t it all real? Everything we lived, our home, our son, she was my wife for I don’t know how long and it was all trigon controlling my mind, but still, it felt so real. So good.

I had to find her.

“What’s going on?” Gar appeared with his face pretty much hurted.

“Hey, Gar, I swear I’ll tell you everything later but, where’s Y/n?”

“She’s black eyed, Dick. Outside, Don’t think you should..”

“I will get her back.”

When I came outside, all the titans were looking at Trigon and Raven, and I knew her enough to know that she’d deal pretty well with him. I looked at Y/n and she wasn’t awake, so I pulled her by her arm.

I turned her to look at me and she did.

“Y/n, it’s me, Dick. Wake up.”

“That’s me. The real me.” She had Trigon on her mind still and I needed her back.

“It’s not, I know you, Y/n. I saw you, in my vision, I had you with me so please, come back.”

Our eyes were locked, she seemed to hear what I had said and with no reluctance, she was back, her eyes weren't blacked anymore and she woke up.

“Dick.” she seemed confused. We all were.

“You’re back.”

I hugged her and she hugged me back, words were never spoken between me and Y/n, although I bet everyone knew about our feelings about each other, I never faced it, until now. I broke the embrace to look at her-

“I had you, Y/n, in my mind, during all the time you were with me and when I faced reality, it was sad that it was only a dream. It made me realize that’s enough of hiding, I need you to keep with me, because I don’t know what I’d do if you didn’t and because.. I love you.”

She looked at me as if she couldn’t believe it.

“I’m being completely honest in every word I said.”

“I’m here, Dick. Kiss me.” She said, surprising me, and I did.

“I’ve waited for this for so long.” She said when we parted our kiss.

#sleeping beauty's song #i LOVED WRITING THIS #dick grayson #dick grayson batman #dick grayson comics #dick grayson titans #dick grayson imagines #robin imagines #nightwing imagines #dick grayson imagine #dick grayson one shot #dick grayson quotes #batfamily imagines #titans imagines #rachel roth #trigon #dick grayson x y/n #dick grayson x reader #dick grayson x you

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aitarose · 4 years ago

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hi! i’ve been so inactive lately and wanted to post something today, and i realized i haven’t made an appreciation post for my moots in a hot minute—so hey hotties, here’s some cute words about uu. oh and this isn’t all of my mutuals, just the one’s i’ve spoken to outside of the discord lol asjfdkl

@hesthermay —❥ you’re one of my best friends and ilysm and i hope that we get to meet in person one day, so you can endlessly hear me talk about how much i love jimmy woo. also i want to get matching marvel bracelets or smth, gonna look on etsy later for us ajskdlf

@probablydisgusting —❥ you’re like actually so funny and sweet, whenever you pop in the gc on snap just to say goodmorning or goodnight—it really makes everyone’s day and we love having you around. plus, you were one of the first people to pop into my inbox when i was an atla blog and i think that’s so nice.

@imarizaki —❥ i literaly love you sm mari, like you’re adorable and i want to give you a hug, i feel like you give rlly good hugs. and congrats on 400!! you deserve it and i hope 500 comes rolling around fast so you can hit another milestone in the near future ajskfdl

@tsukishumai —❥ cam i swear i know your name like I SWEAR I DO! you’re like an older sister to everyone in the discord and you bring such a comforting presence like it’s so nice to have you in the chat whenever you choose to pop in. you’re quite literally the calm to our insanity

@fukurodianthus —❥ dani you’re asleep rn but when you wake up and see this i want you do know that ily wifey. pls i love it when you harass me in my inbox, i think it’s so funny AND IM GOING TO FLOOD YOUR’S EVENTUALLY I JUST NEED TO BECOME ACTIVE AGAIN ASDJKL

@missmorosis —❥ you’re literally one of my favorite moots ever and you’re always so sweet to me and everyone else around you, it’s so heartwarming to see your positivity and happiness on tumblr and how hard you work! pls ilysm

@ray-ofmoonlight —❥ I LOVE TALKING TO YOU ABOUT THE BACHELOR. i haven’t responded in a hot minute, but dw i’ll answer in a bit i have to go through my messages jaksfld. you’re so nice and fun, and literally the sweetest ever

@diorzumi —❥ hi rheya! i’m so glad you took the time and all that hard work to make the server, like that’s insane and i still can’t believe you did all of that. pls the amount of effort you put into keeping it up is so evident and amazing!! also ur rlly pretty, like RLLY pretty

@luvoikawa —❥ gigi!! my face literally lights up whenever i see you in my notifs or on my dash pls. i love your energy sm and the presence you bring to the discord. like idk, you just seem really cool to me, does that make sense? like you have cool girl energy.

@sugas-cookie —❥ hello rissie. you should be sleeping rn, but ily and you’re my favorite and only child, and no matter what i say i would never bring you back to the ditch. but like...the frogs? i fucking hate the frogs, abolish all frogs they make me physically cringe i cannot.

@kei7ime —❥ CHLOEEE!! every time i see your theme i feel so satisfied, like it’s so pretty it rlly is. you’re so fun and i love talking to you or just popping in your inbox to say hi. omg hi chloe!! ok ok ily

@pxnk-velvet —❥ angie your drawing of us are so cute and i love them sm, and i can’t wait to read the story that you’ve been writing of our gc as a volleyball team, like pls i’m so excited. also the line “just shut up already, angie” lives in my head rent free

@miyalove —❥ hi dylan! i haven’t popped in your inbox in a while but i just wanted to tell you that i love u and you’re so nice and sweet and ilysm. you give off hot girl energy dylan, like for real, you rlly do.

@iwaizoom —❥ HI JADE. you’re so nice and your blog is so pretty, like the light green jaskljl PLS ITS SO PRETTY. i love the vibes you give off like you’re so chill and so easy to talk to sjakljdkl pls ilysm

@kageyuji —❥ lore i love you. like i love you. every time i talk to you i just feel happy like idk it’s this overwhelming feeling, you just have this gift where people feel comfortable when they’re talking to you. and your blog is so pretty pls asdjl

@hikariakaashi —❥ you’re one of my favorite moots, firstly bc of our interactions on tumblr in the early days of the discord and now on snap too. you have rlly good style, like rlly good style—and whenever you do your voice asks, your voice is like rlly pretty! girl you have a rlly pretty voice!

@ceci-chan —❥ hi twinnie! pls i think it’s so funny that we have literally the exact same nose, that’s actually wild. it’s so fun to watch your blog grow and your events are so cute and ily

@nekomabvc —❥ i buried you in here so you’d have to search for your part. literally going to say nothing i’m tired of writing about you goodbye. you called me a whore this morning. that’s not very swag of you, i’m going to report you to mab and cancel you on corpse tumblr.

@bellesowl —❥ hi isa! we haven’t interacted all that much, but in the times we have you’ve been so kind. and you’re rlly pretty, just sayin. you’re blog is also super aesthetic and i literally live for it, pls the muted tones are everything ajsdlk

@gellysticks —❥ angela pls you’re actually so funny like you’re so funny. every time your tiktoks come up in my suggested they literally make me laugh pls—but the frogs are terrible. abort frogs. this is a frog slandering blog. me and all my homies HATE frogs.

@cafemiya —❥ issy you give off such hot girl energy (and you are a hot girl anyways) and your energy is so contagious, like idk how it just is. you bring this positivity to the discord just by being there and i know everyone is so thankful that you’re so interactive with us jaskfdl

@biqherosix —❥ DANIZA I HAVEN’T OPENED YOUR SNAP YET BUT I RLLY WANT TO HEAR YOUR BAND PLAY. pls that’s literally so cool, like i wish i was in a cool band with my friends jsakdljkl. i love talking to you and we’ve been friends for like a good three months now which is crazy

@velvetfireworks —❥ rach i literally never read fics but yours are so good and they live in my head rent free. PLS THE SAKUSA ONE FOR THE BROKEN HEARTS CLUB AUDHS. you’re so nice and so talented and i reread your masterlist OMG I JUST REMEMBERED THE MOB AU ONE THAT ONE IS PERFECTION.

@hajiswife —❥ hi gabbie! your blog is gorgeous and your so nice pls!! like i literally can’t believe we’re mutuals it hits me like a brick. i love your works and your energy sjaklfdjl i’ll probably be popping in your inbox later just to say hi lol

@svgashi —❥ NIKE!!! omg we’re literally sister wives. you’re the first moot i had on tumblr that understood how great sugawara is and it’s like a breath of fresh air from the constant slandering my friends give him. ILY

@sexy-bee-juice —❥ aja!! i love getting your messages and just saying the most out of pocket things with you, and your reblogs make me laugh so hard like you’re rlly funny. also my broken french is terrible but i’m glad it makes you laugh ajskfdl

@koutarousangel —❥ MICKEY PLS YOURE SO FUNNY. I LOVE YOUR VIBES AND EVERYTHING LIKE YOURE FUNNY. and ily too. just putting that in there in case i haven’t said it in a while <3

@hvnlydmn —❥ hi ains! congrats on 5k!! that’s literally so insane like omg you must be reeling rn jadskfl you really really deserve it tho, everyone sees how hard you work and how much content you produce in such a short amount of time CONGRATS ILY

@akaashi-bby —❥ victoria you were the first person i talked to teen wolf with in like three years pls. i’m listening to a song from the show atm and it’s making me sad but ilysm and i love talking to you about literally anything

@laineywritesstuff —❥ LAINE!! hi! you’re so pretty like you look like you give the warmest hugs and i feel like if i ever met you in person i’d just get engulfed does that make sense? you’re so nice and ilysm and i hope you’re have a fantastic day!

@kiyoalex —❥ you’re rlly funny. like rlly funny. and i feel like we match each other’s energy pretty well in pms. pls my insanity is too real back there BUT IT’S OK I THINK BC YOU SEEM TO UNDERSTAND IT LOL ILY

@shoutamajiki —❥ hi nana!! you’re so nice and i’m so glad you joined the discord! and i’m so sorry i added you to my terrible private story on snap pls it’s so bad i’m very very sorry about that jksalfjdl

@sunacity —❥ nea i love your works so much like literally they LIVE in my head. you’re so talented and i can’t believe we’re mutuals that’s literally insane bc i love your stuff pls. and on top of being talented you’re so nice, like the nicest jaskdflj i can’t

ok ok i think that’s it for now, this isn’t all of my mutuals—but it’s the one’s i interact with the most and if we are moots and i didn’t include you pls my inbox or pms are always open to just like go insane in. ok have a great rest of your day!!

#2021:appreciation

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domjaehyun · 3 years ago

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would you wanna talk more about the poetry you almost got published? 🥺

omg ….. yes ….. wtf yes jsjfsjdj okay wait i’m gonna try and control my response bc . i rly don’t think i should go on abt everything i wanna mention (update: i didn’t rly control my response that much i just spared you like . the nitty gritty of my poems/poetry specifically) if you don't wanna read what i have to say as i gush abt poetry for several paragraphs, you prob don't wanna click the read more jdfgsjldk

but i wrote a poetry chapbook (a collection of poems) a few years ago and it was entirely based on flowers!! so yknow how flowers have meanings? i found 50 diff flowers with all different meanings and i wrote a poem about each flower !! and a lot of the poems are like . some of my best work like some of them i read out loud and i literally can’t finish without crying or like i notice lil things i did and i’m like DAMN that was clever 😭😭😭

and i submitted it to a couple of publishers that were doing chapbook contests and if you won you got a cash prize and you got published! and i didn’t win THOSE but i wasn’t super discouraged bc like . i was 20 . i was up against like . Adults like full blown adults who were probs seasoned poets so i was like fine w it bc it’s good practice anyway!! but so somehow i got the idea to just. submit directly to an agency and i kinda forgot abt it for a while and then one day i got a Thick Packet in the mail from them (which, as i know from my college application days, is usually a very good sign) and !!! when i opened it, i flipped out bc i’d gotten a publishing offer!!!!!!! at 20!!!!! like that was insane to me and my mom and i freaked out abt it and i texted my old gc from college (we all took the same advanced poetry class) and told them and they were super excited for me!!!!

i didn’t end up taking it, though, bc like . the agency said basically that bc i’m young and previously unpublished and wouldn’t have had a pre-existing audience (all valid concerns to have as a publishing agency obviously) that it was more of a risky endeavor to publish me so they offered to publish me if i gave them like . basically at least 2k i think it was 2400 or 2700 … i’ll check i still have the emails and pics of the correspondence but like . again . i was 20 !! i was working at a pretty poorly paid job like . i literally had no disposable income to save up :/ like p much all my money went to helping my mom with bills, my transportation to and from work, food on my lunch breaks, and like . a fraction of it would go to like . living my life and trying to have a fragment of fun yknow?

so i ended up not taking the deal bc i couldn’t afford it :////// was super bummed abt that part but like it’s all good!!

and then like maybe a year or 2 later i submitted the same chapbook (i think i had to select 30 poems to meet the page limit) to a small publishing press that specifically centered around lgbt+ women i think? and during the height of the BLM movement, they did a kind of contest but they waived the fee for any black poets so i figured there was literally no harm in trying yknow? and they answered me a whiiiile later (which was fine !! they were a small literary press and i wasn’t in a rush) and while they didn’t pick me for the winner, they gave me like . super touching praise !!! it meant the world to me !!!

i’m gonna . find some of the screenshots of what they both said hol on OKAY i found them hehehe the first one is the one that DID offer a publishing deal

and this one below didn’t BUT said very lovely things to me !!

i just blurred out the name of the chapbook sjfjsjdj im not sure if i wanna have that out rn but yeah !!!

i loooooooove poetry i love writing it it’s like the only time i actually allow myself to process my emotions and thoughts? like my writing fiction is escapism and daydreamy but my writing poetry is very cathartic and personal and rooted in My Feelings !! plus, writing poetry is in a way more freeing in that you don’t have to follow all the linguistic rules bc it’s your form and you can do what you want !! but at the same time it can be a lil more daunting for that exact same reason like . there are NO rules so pretty much Everything You Do should serve a purpose !! but yeah i really love writing poetry and talking abt my poems and stuff and :) yeah :D my mom and i were talking the other day and she rly wanted me to like . join a creative writing poetry club or like somewhere where i can talk abt and share my poetry !!! which rly does sound so cool and awesome but like again . Shy . what if i get there and i feel super inferior to everyone else 😭😭😭 what if i get there and they just like . fuckin hate me for idk what reason 😭😭😭 it’s a lot it is stressful i am Tense abt it but i wanna do it sooooo badly omg

hhhhh yeah 💖 i think poetry-writing-me is the most honest/authentic version of me i’ve ever met tbh :p like i’ve always kinda struggled w like my personal identity and like Who I Am bc i usually just like . adapt to ppl and groups and situations as i see fit and i’m typically extremely good at it !! but it makes me tense sometimes bc i know there are things i’m holding back to like . appear more palatable ig? but when i write poetry it’s not like i’m proving myself to anyone or trying to . impress anyone idt like . it’s just for me . it’s like dancing when no one’s watching you!! actually i saw a quote the other day that was like. “who are you in a dark room with no mirrors” or smth and that . punched me right in the gut ngl i was like Damn Who Am I For Real……

but yeah poetry me is like . the closest i’ve felt to that situation !! more so like the stuff i wrote after my poetry classes bc like . i was aware the poems were gonna be read by my peers and my professor so i couldn’t . rly . go into intense detail abt just how Not Okay I Was jdjfksdk my teacher was extremely perceptive as it was like . she clocked me on smth i didn’t think she was gonna notice and then when she directly asked me abt it i remember i literally just. burst into tears sjfjdjdj and then moving forward i like !!! FAKED getting better in a poem like i wrote a whole poem abt how i’d started fixing that issue bc i knew she would see it and i didn’t want her to worry sjfjdjdj but surprise . i was not okay . i was Lying 👀 was being sneaky in a silly goofy mood 💖

my scorpio moon was not fucking around that day she got found out and was like “oh never again” and buried the emotion far far underground 💖

okay i digress and im sure i gave you way more than you anticipated or asked for so . yes 💖 thank you for asking i love talking abt this stuff 💖

#answered #anon #ummmmmm #about me #???? ig???? idk

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ickle-ronniekins · 4 years ago

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time to be sappy!

hi my lovelies! i’m wishing you all the happiest new year for 2021. without going into too much detail, we all know how much this past year has sucked. that’s honestly the only way to describe it. it’s absolutely sucked. but i know that one thing we’ve learned is to find the light in the darkness, and it’s something i’ve really been trying to focus on as we navigated and continue to navigate our way through this pandemic.

at the beginning of the year, i was in a writing slump. i was going through some personal stuff that honestly knocked the wind right out of me. i didn’t think i’d ever find the energy to write ever again (and it’s my favorite thing to do; it keeps me sane). i was so drained of energy and love of myself that i wanted to say “fuck it” and give up writing altogether. but then, by a miracle, i found some lovely individuals, and you guys re-sparked my love of the thing i need to do in order to make me who i am. write.

there are so many people i need to thank so here we goooooo

@theweasleysredhair chloe! i remember before the twins got insanely popular on here, you were always one of the writers that stuck out to me. we started chatting back and forth and commenting on one another’s fics. and then you’d decided to take a break from tumblr. i didn’t know if you were coming back (and not to be dramatic but i was heartbroken) and THEN YOU DID and we honestly picked up exactly where we’d left off. now we freak out about one another’s stories, cackle like actual idiots at the magic that is impractical jokers, but it goes much deeper than that. we share life stories, offer advice to one another, and you’re always there for me when i need someone. and good god, girl, you can make me laugh. i hope you know that whenever i hear the word “forty” i think of you and scream FOEH in my head. so grateful for you, i can’t even explain it. also SCOOPSKI POTAYTAHS lmao love you

@harrysweasleys alexa i don’t even know how to adequately express how much you mean to me. i can’t even pinpoint when exactly we started talking deeply about anything and everything, but now our friendship spans countries and dimensions and more and i’m just so fucking thankful that we’re friends. you’re one of the kindest people i’ve met on here and i’m just so blessed to know you, write with you, freak out about books with you (even when i bring them to the post office with me LOL) and everything in between. thank you for choosing me to write a collab with. you are wildly talented beyond your years and i hope you always keep writing, because you have a gift with your storytelling. i just adore you.

@wand3ringr0s3 HALEY. you little ball of fire, you. i can’t even begin to describe how much your sarcasm absolutely slays me in our daily chats. you always have me laughing like an absolute fool and i’m so grateful for it. i know that we’re nine years apart (ew) (pls i feel so old ugh) but i feel like we’re so close in age. thank you for always being honest, voicing your thoughts and opinions, sharing stories, encouraging us to share ours, and for always, always providing the greatest, hottest, highest quality photos of The Men in the GC for us to thirst over. thank you for being you, for being hilarious, for being kind. thank you for writing the stories that you do -- your creativity knows no bounds and that’s something that’s really freaking special about you as a writer (aside from your overall general talent to break my heart) i adore you. keep shining babe.

@diary-of-an-onliner okay thea, you are honestly an enigma and i mean that in the GREATEST way possible. i absolutely never know what you’re thinking or what you’re going to say, but i know it’s going to get me wracking my brain and thinking hard or absolutely losing my shit and laughing on the ground. you never fail to put a smile on my face with your quips. i absolutely freaking adore you. AND ALSO, YOUR WRITING IS FLAWLESS, so if you ever want to share more of it, you know i’ll absolutely read it and 110% freak the fuck out, because you’re a talented little bean. remember head in the clouds/feet on the ground? because i do, and i’m honestly still cracking up about it, and cannot wait for it (if it’s still a thing). I LOVE YOU

@harrypotter-and-the-onering LINDA. i don’t think i can express with enough words just how sweet and genuine you are. whenever i see you in the group chats, it puts a smile on my face, because you always slide in with the SWEETEST COMMENTS and my heart just melts at them. i know we don’t really chat outside of the GCs much, but i’d like to change that, because i really do adore you. you’re such a bright light in this community, to out friend group, and to everyone who has the pleasure of being in your presence. you’re a beyond talented writer and i hope you continue to write more in the new year! also, whenever i eat swiss chocolate, i’ll think of you LOL

@andromedaa-tonks okay mia, my girl, you’re a solid ten years younger than me but somehow we act like we’re twins, exactly the same age, and i’m here for it! we’ve ranted to one another a lot about heartbreak and love, how frustrating it can be, how difficult it is to find, how much we yearn for love that’s true and lasting. we’ve had our fair share of difficult conversations about it but it’s really helped me to realize exactly what i want, and i hope it’s helped you too. also thank you for always indulging me when i rant to you about hot lifeguards on the beach LMAO (it’s winter and they’re not here and i’m mad, don’t they know i want to stare at them??? smh) thank you for being you. i love you. and you’ll find that love babe.

@mycupoffanfiction ellie, my deary, you sweet girl, you. i think you’re just about the nicest freaking human being i’ve ever met. i cannot think of a time where you haven’t greeted me with anything less than exuberance and excitement. i hope you know how much it means to me! and the comments you leave on my stories? they honestly bring me to tears. i cannot express what that means to me; there have been so many times when i’ve felt that my writing isn’t good enough to be able to publish anything, but you’ve reminded me with your kind words that my writing just needs to find the right reader, and for that, i cannot thank you enough. thank you for sharing your stories and your friendship, i am beyond grateful for them both, and i adore you so very much!

and to those i might not talk too as often, a few things: 1) please let’s chat 2) i’m apologizing in advance because I SUCK (like actually suck) at answering messages and it’ll probably piss you off and i’m so sorry 3) i’m v nervous and shy so pls feel free to ~slide into my DMs~ anytime because i’m awkward and probably won’t do it first LOL 4) i adore you all 5) i see your comments on my writing and i CANNOT. CANNOT. cannot thank you enough. it brings me to tears every time i read them, so thank you x

@fopdoodledane @vogueweasley @pit-and-the-pen @thoseofgreatambition @izzytheninja @acciotwinz @starlightweasley @theweirdsideofstuff @pigwidgexn @whiz-bangs78 @thisismynerdyself @gcdric @thisismysketchbook @jenniweaslee @chaoticgirl04 @writesowhatnext @loony-loopy-lupinn @boxofbadaddiction @immobulusmalfoy @cappsikle @oh-for-merlins-sake @godricsswords @valwritesx i’m surely forgetting people omg i’m so sorry i really am

thank you, all of you, for all of the wonder and imagination and magic and kindness you’ve all brought me. ALSO IT’S LATE AND I’M TIRED AND IF I FORGET ANYONE I AM SO, SO, SO SORRY I JUST SUCK ok love y’all

#erica blogs #im sappy #happy new year you hooligans #I LOVE YA

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homebody-nobody · 4 years ago

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you wanna play with fire (stick and poke tattoo)

Jax did you actually write a whole nother fic?? Why yes, dear reader, I did. This is porn, blame @hvitstark and @aarchiess and the rest of the jiara gc for filling up the Sin Bin with inspiration every day. PLEASE interact with this post I work really hard on these fics and seeing them get like ~30 notes and then dying drains my soul. ------------------------ ao3 -------------------------

‘Come home on time or don’t bother coming home at all!’

Her mother’s words echo in her ears as Kiara stomps away from the house in the late-summer heat. Tears well and sting in her eyes and she wipes them away, refusing to let them fall. She doesn’t understand why her parents don’t get it. Her dad grew up in the Cut. Her mom fell in love there, had Kie there, got married there. She belongs there, so much more than on Figure Eight or anywhere else in kooklandia. There’s an honesty to the Cut that evaporates the closer you get to the country clubs and McMansions on the other side of the island. Her heart feels open there, loved and loving. What happened, to make her parents forget all that? Is money really that important, that corrupting and all-consuming, that they would forget what loyalty feels like? What family is?

JJ’s sitting on the porch when she gets to the Chateau, a paperback folded in half in his left hand and a soda dangling from his right. He stands up when he sees her. “Hey,” he says. He’s wearing one of his absurd cutoffs, cargo shorts slung low and no shoes. There’s a cigarette tucked behind his ear and his hair is a ruffled mess, like he’s had his hands in it, thinking too hard. He looks like some ridiculous parody of a vagabond, every bad boy the after-school specials always warned her about.

Taking a deep breath, she nods to the book in his hand. “I didn’t know you could read,” she says. It’s easier to make fun then show the way her heart opens and bleeds at the sight of him.

He smiles, lopsided and quiet. “Good to see you, too.”

She mounts the stairs to the porch without asking, even though with every step she takes closer to him, she’s less sure of how to act. They haven’t talked since the night John B died, since the last time she was here. They had sex, the night the Phantom went down. It was fast and messy and a little awkward, because she was still Kie and he was still JJ, and fucking your best friend for the first time is never easy, now matter how long you’ve been waiting to do it.

It’s barely been a week, but it feels like longer, and since she got home that next morning, her parents have been tiptoeing around her, waiting for something to break. It was the simplest thing, really, Kie wondering aloud about JJ, about how he was doing and how she might help him pay off his restitution. (Now that Plan A has spiraled down to Plan L and that failed, besides.) It was her mother and her thinly-veiled scoff, the way it tugged at Kie like calloused skin on fresh sheets. It was Kie mentioning dipping into her college fund to help him, and her parents promptly flying off the handle.

And then, the threat of boarding school, of taking her away from everything she knows and everything she loves, shutting her up in the mountains like some hysterical family member in a victorian asylum, sending her to some institution claiming to be a high school but is basically a finishing school prepping spoiled debutantes for husband-hunting at the ivies. She won’t be one of those girls.

JJ greets her with the usual handshake, and when he goes to sit back down, she grabs at his fingers before she loses the courage, because she doesn’t want to think about any of it anymore, not John B or Sarah, not boarding school, not the tenuous future her parents are planning for her and how little she wants it. He stops, frozen, and every one of her senses is trained on the minimal brush of skin, the tension in his back. She wants her hands on him, her nails dragging down his arms, the taste of his sweat and the burn of his gaze. She wants to be lost in him, because touching JJ switches everything else off. He’s like a magnet for her attention, everything blurring until it’s just his mouth and his hands and his --

“Kie,” he says, a warning in his usually jovial voice. His gaze is locked on her hand, her slender fingers tangled in his, gentle things, held between strength and violence. “You said --”

“I know --” she says, pausing for half a second, surprised by her tone and the immediacy of her response. How quickly she wants to forget the lies she told herself about being able to stay away from him, after knowing what his tongue feels like on her clit and the way he fits perfectly inside her, like they were meant to come together. “What I said.” She’s looking at their linked hands as well, but she’s imagining his between her legs, wants to pull him forward and put it there, just to stop feeling so fucking human, because he makes her feel celestial, instead.

“So?” he asks, licking his lips, his breath picking up like he can read her mind, see her the way she wants to be, naked and underneath him.

“So maybe,” she says, her heartbeat rising in her own throat, taking half a step toward him, tucking her bottom lip between her teeth. His eyes betray him, flicking up to her face and following the motion. She looks up at him, and the second her brown eyes land on his, he’s done resisting, done even considering it. He melts, when she looks at him like that, so grateful for it, after waiting so many years convinced it wouldn’t ever happen. “I changed my mind.”

The air hangs heavy and charged as JJ’s rational side, weak to begin with and driven deep with years of half-thought-out decisions and anticipated-yet-ignored consequences, scrambles to pull him out of her orbit, to get him to let go and stop her from burning up in the periphery of his constant firestorm. But her eyes are on his, and she’s touching him, and she’s asking, and the moon could fall without him noticing, right now.

She pulls, and he follows, and they’re crashing into each other, a kiss that starves before it is even born. Paint flakes and dust fill the air when she slams back against the side of the house, her arms looped around JJ’s neck, one of his tight around her waist, the other braced on the siding, fist clenched, forearm taught. The second he touches her, the world stops spinning, or maybe just they do, because she’s dizzy and soaring under his mouth, chest to chest and sharing breath between teeth and lips and tongues. Victory rises in her chest, pride and anticipation simmering just below the beautiful, vacant hunger that comes from JJ kissing her like this, and it’s that pride that bruises, just a little, when he pulls away.

“You can’t just jump me when you’re upset,” he says, but it’s into her neck, practically a growl as his hand flexes against the small of her back, gathering up her shirt, his fingernails just grazing her skin.

“Can’t I?” she answers, canting her hips up a fraction, pushing against him, demanding his return to ravishing her indecently.

“Fuck, Kie --” he says, and he’s nipping at her neck in bursts, like he knows they should be talking about this, but he can’t help but touch her, overwhelmed with the need to taste her skin and leave her wanting.

“Fine,” she says, sliding her forearm against his shoulder until her hand buries itself in his hair, pulling him back up and kissing him fiercely. “We’ll talk about it,” she sighs, before diving back in for another hard, demanding kiss. And then, “After.”

“Yeah, okay,” JJ relents, pushing off the side of the house and dragging her toward the front door. It’s not a choice but a capitulation, a giving in to the unstoppable force that is Kiara tugging at his soul. Because he’d do anything for her, anything to her that she asks, no matter what he tells himself. He slides his teeth over her bottom lip and pulls away, panting. “After.” They slam through the screen door, stumbling over a broken ankle tether and the trash JJ had been meaning to take out, not even bothering with the farce of trying to make it to the bedroom. Her calves slam into the pullout and she topples backwards, taking her with him.

Kissing JJ is a little like waiting out a hurricane and finally hitting the eye. Thrilling and terrifying, surrounded by power and strength, destruction and damage, but finding peace and respite, and a promise, a hint of the sun. Once he has her underneath him, he slows down, settling his weight between her legs, keeping himself propped on his elbows while he kisses her, solid and hard in his intent. It’s torture, him dancing above her, licking into her mouth only to back off and press kisses across her face, her jaw, and down her neck, sucking damning, claiming marks before scraping his teeth over her ear with the slightest pressure, teasing her, pulling obscene noises from her throat and driving her insane. She pushes her hips up again, and he responds with a deep, heavy roll of his, and she can feel his cock, hot and already half-hard, through the layers of fabric between them.

She wants to feel it, in her hand, her mouth, pressing torturously, deliciously inside her, and he’s still fully clothed and taking way too much damn time. Surging up against him, she flips the two of them over, dangerously close to the edge, and straddles his hips, dragging her hands down his chest. Tossing her hair out of her face and pulling it all to one side, she risks glancing down at him, afraid of the vulnerable drop of her stomach every time she meets his eyes. JJ’s an eclipse in totality, pupils blown wide, shining underneath her, beaming in her shadow. His lips are slightly parted, red and wet, hair disheveled, hands coming down to slide up her thighs, and the image is so hot, so perfect, her chest aches as her cunt throbs for him, a dangerous, terrifying combination. She takes off her shirt.

The sigh he lets out is entirely involuntary, reveling in the warmth and the weight of her, in awe of the smooth plains of exposed skin and the soft curves of her body. She leans down to kiss it out of his mouth, his hand coming up to cup the back of her head, the other sliding around the back of her arm as she holds face. It’s too gentle, too kind and slow, so she sinks her teeth into his lower lip until he groans and tightens her fist in his hair, pulling her with him as she straightens. His hands frame her hips as she grinds down on him, and he ducks his head to lay kisses across her collarbones, his hands sliding up her sides, electric on her bare skin. Letting her head fall back, she takes in the feeling of his lips on her chest, his thumbs tucking under the band of her bra. One stays to brush back and forth over the side of her breast while the other reaches around and pinches apart the clasp in an expert move. Her stomach drops at the thought of JJ doing this with other girls.

Taking her hands from his hair to cup his jaw, she redirects his attention back to her lips as her bra slides down her arms and her nipples pebble in the cool air. She holds on just a little too long, presses into him closed-mouth and soft, and he melts under her touch, his hands framing her ribs, her hair falling around them in a peach-scented curtain. When he initiates moments like this, she runs from them, too scared of what she might feel if she falls in like she’s falling now, heart pounding, her thumbs skating over his cheekbones. He leans up into her touch, one of his arms dropping to her waist and pulling her in closer to him, holding her tight. She pulls away from the kiss, keeping her forehead pressed to his.

“Kie,” he sighs. Her breath hitches at the sound of her name from his mouth, like it almost always does, except he’s never close enough to notice. The silence that follows holds too much for the small space it occupies, and while she has no idea what he’s scared of saying, it almost falls from his lips anyway. Before he can make too much of an idiot out of himself, she pulls her arms back out of the straps of her bra, reaching between them to toss it to the side. As she does, she keeps his eyes on his, the smallest pockets of relief opening as his gaze drops to her tits, and then the heat in her stomach picking up again as he licks his lips. He ducks his head again, taking one of her nipples into his mouth like a sacrament, like she’s holy, closing his eyes and moaning, deep and satisfied at the taste of her skin. It goes straight to her cunt, and she feels wetness gathering there, even more than before.

This, they’ve already done. There’s still fading bruises across her chest from the first night they spent together, when he ate her out til she screamed and then fucked her senseless, and while that seems to be the course of action he’s aiming for here, she has other ideas. She slides her hands back into JJ’s hair -- God, she could spend hours playing with JJ’s hair -- and tightens her grip, her blunt nails scraping gently over his scalp. In return, he teases his teeth over her nipple, and when she arches and gasps at the motion, tries to flip himself back on top.

But Kiara has a goal, and she tightens her thighs around his hips, flattening her hands on his chest and pushing back, shaking her head playfully. He raises his eyebrows and flashes her half a smile, as if to say ‘oh, really?’, but settles his hands on her hips and lets her take charge. Her first order of business is getting him just as naked as she is; he holds up his arms obediently as she tugs his shirt off of him, and this is different now, than when it started. They’re taking their time with each other, grateful to drop the guise of desperation and explore every secret spot and inch of forbidden skin. It should scare the shit out of her, and it sort of does, but it’s also… kinda fun. JJ makes this shy vulnerability so easy to sink into, knowing that any teasing has no real heat behind it, that he’ll be gentle and kind and listen to what she wants and what she likes. Yes, the bar is on the floor, but this boy is her best friend for a reason, this loving, crazy dumbass, that would set himself on fire to keep her warm. And that trust, those years of rapport and familiarity, make moments like these so much more comfortable, easier with a net underneath the thrill of flying high, trading touch for pleasure and knowing that he’ll be there to catch her on the comedown.

She leans down and kisses him, soft at first and then deeper, licking into his mouth and rolling her hips down onto him, stretching her arms above his head and dragging her tits up his bare torso, smiling against his lips at the sound he makes. Ducking her head against his neck, she leaves her own trail of marks and then shifts her weight off of him to the side so she can reach down and pop the fly of his shorts open with one hand. He hisses in a sharp inhale when she reaches her hand between the layers of clothing and palms him over his underwear, giving him a second of satisfying contact before backing off, teasing him with her fingertips. He rolls onto his side, angling himself over her, kissing her hungrily.

“Fucking hell, Kie,” he says, tucking his face into the side of her neck. “You got no fucking right to feel that good.” He’s warm and solid against her chest, hot and hard under her fingers, and something opens in her chest as he kisses her again, slow and sensual but not rushing, not pushing for things to go further or asking for anything she’s not willing to give. She pushes his underwear down as best she can, and he shudders as bare skin meets. The feeling of his cock in her hand sets her skin alight as he muffles moans in her neck, and she twists her hand over the head of it, spreading the wetness she finds there over the shaft.

JJ surrenders to her, relaxing against her side as she works her hand over him, leaning into her, muttering half-formed praise into her skin like a prayer. She bites down a smile at the words, trying to hide how much she enjoys having him so vulnerable under her touch, how hot she gets listening to him react, feeling the soft skin over hard muscle. Kissing him firmly, she pushes him onto his back, leaning over him as she strokes his cock, one of his arms coming up to hold her, the other hand pushing into her hair. She hadn’t had time to do this the first night they were together, too focused on her own desperate need to get lost in him, so she takes her time working her way down his bare torso, sinking her teeth into his chest, leaving red and purple marks in her wake.

He stutters on an inhale when he realizes what she’s doing, and when she curls her hands in the waistband of both shorts and boxers, concern fills his dear, blue eyes. “You don’t have to --” he breathes, caught between concern for her and the deep, furious want pulsing in his blood. “Just because I --”

Kiara licks her lips, and JJ watches the movement, powerless not to. “I want to,” she says, realizing the truth of it as she says it, and the resulting look on JJ’s face puts butterflies in her stomach. (Which, like, she really doesn’t have time to think about right now.) So, in answer, she pulls his pants and underwear down and off, tossing them to the side and settling herself between his legs. It’s a little intimidating, JJ spread out naked before her, his cock eagerly awaiting her attention. She knew it was big, of course. After last time, the rumors had been confirmed true; JJ Maybank was excellently skilled with both hands and mouth, in addition to being ridiculously well-hung. It isn’t fair, really. But it’s one thing when he’s fucking her, and another when she’s face to face with it.

He senses her hesitation and reaches down, brushing his fingers over her face in gentle reverence, and the touch shocks something inside her she’s not ready to confront. Instinctively, she pulls away, and, when concern colors his storm-sky eyes, she smiles, and ties up her hair. JJ’s breath catches in his chest as the sight, and it bolsters her confidence. She leans forward to kiss him one more time, twisting her hand over the head of his cock, solid and determined, and before he can recover, she ducks her head and takes him into her mouth.

He grasps at the sheets as she swirls her tongue curiously around the tip, letting spit and precum drip down the shaft, spreading it towards the base with her hand. “Fuck, yes,” he sighs, his eyes falling closed, his head dropping to the pillow. It’s satisfying, and triumphant, and hot, to see him so at her mercy, helpless and prone in the oldest kind of worship. After a while of torturous teasing, she takes as much of him as she can into her mouth, pressing her thumb into her palm to push down her gag reflex -- a trick Sarah told her about that she’s never needed til him. He keens, and the noise has her pushing her hips against the mattress, rocking into the seam of her shorts. Bobbing her head, experimenting with pace and angle, she flicks her tongue smartly against the underside of the tip of his cock, and the moan that follows that move is very interesting indeed. She tries it a few more times until he’s gasping out a warning, and she draws back until her lips just wrap around the head, swallowing neatly as he chokes out her name.

She comes up smiling, and he half sits up, reaching for her, sated and grasping. He kisses her soundly, pulling her back down next to him, one hand in her hair, one arm around her waist, his favorite way to hold her, it seems. Settling her on her back, his tongue meets hers and he groans at the taste of himself. “You,” he says, pulling back to press kisses down her neck. She can’t keep in the happy, smug giggle that works its way out of her chest. “Are so fucking hot.”

“Not too bad yourself,” she laughs as he tucks his face between her tits, the last word followed by a sharp gasp as he wraps his lips around a nipple, like he can’t help but have his mouth on her, can’t help but taste her skin and send her heart racing.

“I knew you were looking,” he says, propping his chin on her sternum and looking up at her with a shit-eating grin, mischief and post-orgasm glow sparkling in his stupid, stupid blue eyes. He’s been paying attention to her, thinking about this. The thought flips something over in her chest, and she shoves his head playfully.

“Shut up,” she says, trying to keep her voice light. She picks her hips up, trying to keep him focused on the event at hand. Yeah, JJ’s easily distracted, but she’s half-naked in front of him, She kinda hoped that would avoid unnecessary conversation. “And get back to work.”

“Yes ma’am,” he says, half-kidding -- but his eyes darken just a shade too far to be all tease. (Which, she thinks to herself, is certainly something to be investigated.) He devotes his full attention back to her chest, licking and sucking and biting at her nipples, loving the soft, small noises she makes under his touch. Her tits aren’t usually so sensitive, but JJ knows what the fuck he’s doing, and it’s unfair how much he’s able to work her up with her pants still on. Blowing him was already incredibly hot, and, when his hand finally slides into her underwear, he curses at the wetness he finds between her legs. “Holy hell, Kie,” he sighs.

“Maybe a little more hell,” she says, gripping his arm as his finger drags slowly up her slit, “and a little less holy?” She bites her lip as he teases her, dipping in and out of her folds, tracing his fingers over the lips of her cunt, because he wants her to keep making those godforsaken sounds. Because he can.

“Anyone ever tell you you’ve got a smart mouth?” he asks, raising his head to suck a mark directly under her ear, smiling against her skin at the resulting gasp.

“Maybe, ah --” she cries, when his careful fingers find her clit and his calloused fingertips explore the sensitive area, “once or twice.”

This is… way more talking than last time. Last time was desperate and grief-stricken and needy, a request for heedless escape in the wake of the unthinkable. Now -- it’s still a distraction, but there were other courses of action available when she showed up at the Chateau as the sun started to sit low in the afternoon sky. She didn’t have to jump him. He didn’t have to let her. JJ kisses her, deep and filthy, putting himself back in charge, angling his body over hers as she presses back into the thin mattress, arcing into his touch, one hand braced on his (very nice) bicep, the other tangled in his messy, golden hair.

He focuses on her clit, spreading the wetness up from her entrance and toying with different pressure and motions, paying attention to what she likes, and she directs him with the sounds she makes, every small moan a ‘yes, please, more of that.’ He’s the most responsive partner she’s ever had, focused on her and her only, his main purpose to make her feel good, not work her up just to fuck or speed past foreplay to move to something more. It makes it better, and when he finally slides a finger into her, he gasps, too, because it’s a privilege for him to feel her, hot and wet and waiting.

“Oh, god,” she whines, as he pumps his finger slowly in and out of her, his thumb on her clit.

“God’s a little formal,” he says, lifting his head to look at her, his expression teasing even as kindness and something else big and unwanted settles in his eyes. “You can stick with JJ.” She tries to smack his arm for that, but ends up sinking her nails into his skin as he slides another finger inside of her a little too easily. He goes slowly, curling his fingers up into her g-spot with every stroke, kissing her lazily and alternating to her neck when she can’t help but gasp at his touch.

It’s torture, the way he takes his time, and after a while she’s begging. “Fuck me, JJ,” she pleads. “God, fuck me, please,” and his spent cock twitches against her leg because fuck if that isn’t something he’s been waiting to hear. His hand speeds up as he decides his next move. When he takes his hands out of her pants she lets out a sound she’d rather he didn’t remember, but based on the way that he smiles against her skin, he won’t be doing that any time soon. He doesn’t even have time to pause at her waistband as he kisses down her body, because she’s very enthusiastically supporting what’s about to happen next, shoving both shorts and underwear down.

He chuckles and tugs them off, tossing them somewhere that’s future Kie’s problem, and heat rises in him again as she spreads her legs for him. Settling on his stomach, he hooks his arms under her thighs, miles of bare skin pressing together with a quiet whisper of faith. She runs her fingers through his hair as he kisses up her legs, taking his time, reveling in the sight and the smell of her. Foolish smiles meet in shy glances and chuckles that are half breath and half disbelief. JJ radiates warmth from his bare skin, broad and powerful below her, and she hooks a leg over his shoulder, sliding her foot up his back and biting her lip as he raises his eyebrows in response, drawing closer to her hot, aching center.

He starts lightly, dragging the tip of his tongue up her slit, just to taste the wetness there, to make her squirm and curse and ask for more. It’s hard to resist the way she begs for him, and he sets in with a purpose, flicking his tongue over her clit and fitting two fingers inside of her, mouth and hands working with a skilled harmony. She clutches at his hair, not afraid to drag her fingernails over his scalp, vocal and unapologetic in how much she’s enjoying this, how much she wants him. When he finds a combination of hooking his fingers against her g-spot and brushing the tip of his tongue over her clit, her legs clamp around his head as she begins to climb, a deep pull starting low in her stomach.

“Don’t stop,” she pleads, “fucking hell, JJ -- God, just like that, don’t fucking stop. Please don’t fucking stop.” He doesn’t, and the sound that comes out of her as she crashes over the edge is loud and guttural and possibly the hottest thing that’s ever fucking happened to him. She cums against his mouth furiously, her stomach flexing and her legs shaking, and he’s a little proud of himself, honestly, as he brings her down gently, sliding his fingers out of her, soothing her with long strokes of his tongue. When her breathing finally slows, he presses kisses over her thighs and then her stomach as he rises back up to meet her.

She kisses him, awestruck and grateful, not minding her own taste as she pulls him down against her, wanting as much bare skin to be touching as possible. She tucks his hair behind his ears and strokes her thumb over his jaw before he falls on his side next to her, staring, tracing his hand up her side in veneration and wonder. It’s hard, the weight of his gaze, so she closes her eyes, drops her forehead against his. “Literally how,” she sighs, and laughs, one arm tucked under his neck and hooked around his shoulders, the other draped over his trim waist.

“It’s not hard,” he promises (falsely), cheshire grin in full force. “Just paying attention.” He kisses her before she has a chance to respond, mostly gentle but with a sense he’s holding back a little, inviting her to take the next step forward. She deliberates for a moment as she sucks on his lower lip, scraping her teeth gently, cataloguing every noise he makes and what move precedes it, learning him. She could go home, now. She’s been sufficiently distracted. She feels a little better, like maybe she can talk to her parents without screaming her head off or bursting into tears. But the pull of the boy next to her is strong and tempting, miles of tan skin with rippling muscle shifting underneath.

The secret is, she always wants to touch JJ. Something about him is magnetic, like a gravitational field she can’t resist. Whenever they’re in the van or on the Pogue or even just chilling on the couch, she finds herself shifting closer. She’s always stepping just behind his shoulder, would prop her chin there -- if she didn’t know that he would freeze up and question the physical contact. Sometimes, she feels jealousy ache in her stomach at his casual physicality with Pope and John B, always slinging his arm around their shoulders or play-fighting or latching onto them, just to be annoying. He’s still physical with her -- she doesn’t think he knows how not to be -- but it’s different, restrained, and sometimes she sees him half-move, reaching out instinctually, only to second guess himself and let his hands fall.

She shifts into him, pressing herself as close as she can, appreciating the gasp he lets out at the press of her bare chest against his, her leg sliding against his dick, already half-hard again. They kiss for a while, and it would be lazy and slow, if they could let themselves relax; but JJ’s still biting something down, and Kie starts to get frustrated trying to draw it out. Finally, tired of waiting, she licks into his mouth with a sudden push, and he’s not surprised, but annoyingly expectant, glad his baiting has finally worked. There’s a moment of tension and pushing as they silently argue who’s going to be on top, and Kie wins when she reaches down and wraps her hand around his cock.

He falls back, and she climbs on top of him, biting down a wide grin of her own. She sits back on her heels, sticking out her chest a little, stroking him slowly, reveling in the way he fights to control his expression. He starts at her tits, palming them with work-roughened hands, before sliding his palms down her body, lingering on the curve of her waist, brushing over her ass, running down her thighs and back up. She lets her head fall back, drinking in his touch, closing her eyes so she doesn’t have to meet his. She can feel him staring, though, unrelenting and hungry, merciless in the way he worships her. She can’t look at him, can’t take the kind of want and lust seething in his eyes, so settles herself over his cock, sliding her cunt up and down his shaft, her hands braced on his chest, his hands gripping her hips, fingertips sinking into her skin.

Part of her wants him to leave bruises, even though she knows he’s not holding her roughly enough for that. He’s being so kind, so soft and respectful, everything she never thought he would be in a situation like this. She loves the tease, the slow build, but she wants him now, viscerally so, rocking her hips over him, hearing him shudder and moan, feeling him clutch at her. She wants him to beg for her, keen her name like she did his. Leaning down to kiss him, she pushes herself all the way up his cock, the tip just brushing her entrance, and he moans, long and filthy. “God,” he gasps, barely coherent. “Fuck, Kiara, please.”

She smiles at that, sitting up, standing on her knees and taking him in her hand. They’d talked about being clean, about her IUD, the first night, and while she’s grateful she doesn’t have to have the same conversation again, it sets an unnerving precedent. The first time was supposed to be the last time. And now there’s today, and she’s not certain she wants to give him up, yet. She doesn’t know what that means, doesn’t know what he’s feeling or what anything between them would look like in a world so tempest-tossed and half-destroyed. But this -- this part will always be easy.

Taking him inside her feels like a prayer. She goes slowly, sinking down, giving herself time to adjust to his size, his hands flexing on her hips. He fills her perfectly, and she’s never believed the bullshit about soulmates or needing someone else to be complete, but with JJ’s cock inside her, his hips, narrow and strong between her legs, she feels a hell of a lot closer to whole. She starts to move, slow and deep, squeezing him on the way up, bottoming out on the way down. He curses and clenches his teeth, wound so tight she can see it, and she wants him to snap, to flip them in a single move and fuck her into the mattress.

He watches her, lets her set the rhythm, thrusting up as she pushes down, but the movement is still tight and controlled. She knows this boy inside and out, knows that he’s holding back for her, afraid of hurting her, of losing her trust or making her feel objectified or powerless. She knows he wants to be careful, to not fuck this up -- because this is a this, now, neither of them have any say in that anymore -- but she also wants his raw power, his strength and abandon, and maybe that’s what drives the next words to fall from her mouth. “Come on, JJ,” she groans impatiently, raking her fingernails down his chest. “Aren’t you gonna take what’s yours?” He’s confused for exactly half a second before she shifts her weight pointedly to the empty space to their left, and before she even registers that he’s moving, she’s on her back, her hands pinned above her head, JJ’s hips slamming obscenely into her own. It’s intense and desperate and fast, and she tugs one of her hands free, bringing it down to her clit to rub hard circles there in pace with his wild hips, knowing he won’t last long like this and chasing that cherished high, just behind him.

He comes before she does on a sharp, animalistic cry, tensing above her and filling her with warmth. She doesn’t have time to be disappointed, because he swears, pulls out, and replaces his cock immediately with his fingers. His cum makes it easy to fit three fingers inside her at once, dextrous and skilled, focused on making her orgasm just as good as his. It doesn’t take long until she’s grabbing at his shoulder, panting and moaning and almost crying, he feels so good, and when he bats aside the hand on her clit in favor of ducking between her legs and replacing it with his mouth, she screams, riding his face and his hand as wave upon wave crashes over her, feet pushing her hips off the pullout, legs quivering and stomach tense. He stays with her, merciless, flicking his tongue across her clit over and over again, until she has to shove his head away with trembling hands, collapsing into the bed in holy, sated exhaustion.

It takes her a second to open her eyes, and when she does, he’s back up next to her, pushing the three fingers into his mouth to suck them clean. “You’re disgusting,” she says, but she’s still panting, out of breath while her chest heaves, and it carries little heat.

He brushes gentle fingers over her temple, tucking away a stray curl. “But we taste so good together,” he teases, his breath fanning across her face as he leans down to kiss her. Their mouths move in lazy harmony, finally at ease, and, of course, he’s right. “C’mon,” he says, tucking his face against her neck, his floppy blond hair falling into her eyes. “Shower?”

“Mmmm,” she hums, thinking she might be anchored to the bed at the base of her spine. “Maybe in a sec.” Honestly, she doesn’t think she’ll be able to stand, but she doesn’t want to give him the satisfaction of hearing that. He chuckles, knowing exactly what he’s done, and shoves himself up as she curses his never-ending, boundless energy. He brings her water and some paper towels to clean herself up, and, when he sees her sitting up, searching for her underwear, digs in the duffel on the armchair and tosses her a pair of boxers.

She raises an eyebrow at him. “What?” he protests, tugging underwear and a pair of basketball shorts up over his ass. (Which she’s a little disappointed to see disappear beneath layers of fabric once more). “They’re clean.” She puts them on without standing up before rolling over to her stomach and stretching her arms out, tucking them underneath her head. Sweat cools on heated skin as golden hour stretches across the Chateau’s living room, and she wants to live in this moment forever.

JJ lowers himself onto her back, scattering kisses across her shoulders, and she giggles and turns underneath him until they’re pressed chest-to-chest, his weight braced on his elbows on either side of her head. She looks at him, now, her hair a mess and eyes shining, skin still heated from his touch. He leans down to kiss her, and she lets him, even though this is dangerous territory, blurring hazy lines between friends and friends-with-benefits and lovers and ‘together’ and all the other things they could call themselves. The kiss is slow and sweet, and when he pulls back it’s to kiss her cheeks, her closed eyes, her nose. It’s silly and soft and so incorrect to the image of JJ she’s always had in her mind, that she laughs under his attention.

“What?” he asks, laughing with her, dive-bombing her with kisses to her face and neck, her arms coming up around his neck, her fingers in his hair.

“You’re so dumb,” she says, still laughing as she shoves him off. He doesn’t go far, just crashes down next to her, their legs still tangled, one arm tucked back under his head, the other resting on the curve of her waist. Her hands trace his arms, shoulders, chest, mapping them like territory she intends to settle.

“Yeah, but --” he says, and then stops, because the rest of that sentence carries a different weight now. The ‘you still love me’ hangs in the air anyway, and it means something else than it did the last time he tossed it out -- after leaving her stranded on the marsh with Sarah Cameron, a day that feels like years ago.

She curls her hands into fists on his chest before spreading them out again, breaking eye contact and biting her bottom lip. “Yeah,” she sighs. Because she does, even if she can’t define how anymore.

“So you gonna tell me why you came here?” he asks, when the moment stretches on into too many seconds and the weight of it threatens to crush them both.

Kie sighs, heavy and tired, as the memory of earlier that day comes crashing back down, chasing out the golden afternoon and pulling her back to all of the guilt and anger and frustration she’d asked JJ to distract her from. “Do I have to?” she asks, still avoiding his eyes, too tired to dodge it any more carefully than that.

“C’mon, Kie,” he urges, “you said you’d talk about it.” She hates him for a second, because isn’t this JJ’s whole thing? ‘Dank nugs and the stickiest of ickies,’ right? ‘Deny, deny, deny’? There are a million things he’s said, just over this summer, that she could pull out on him right now. But also, she’s not him, and she likes to talk things out, has to, or else whatever it is that’s bothering her consumes every waking thought. Maybe he knows that. Maybe he’s just being a really good friend at a really bad time.

So she tells him, because she’s avoiding Pope and John B’s fucking dead or lost at sea or whatever the fuck he is, and so is Sarah. And even though Kiara would never have considered going to her before -- everything -- maybe she would now, if she had the chance. “My parents want to send me to boarding school,” she says, dropping it whole on his chest and hoping he can breathe under it.

“Oh,” he sighs, like this admission has shoved the word out of him. “Holy shit.”

“Yeah.” He doesn’t say anything else, so she keeps going. “So I freaked out, and I left.” She keeps flexing her hands on his chest, keeping her eyes there even as they threaten to fill with tears. “And my mom --” she chokes, and he pulls her close, putting his lips on her forehead. “My mom said that if I didn’t --” she swallows, trying to keep it together, “that if I didn’t come home on time, not to --” she takes a controlled breath, willing the tears away. “Not to bother coming home at all.” It sounds silly, saying it to him, when she knows, now, what he’s been through. What his dad does to him and why he’s here, instead of his own house. It sounds petty and inconsequential and she’s never felt more like an ignorant kook in her life, so she sniffs, and takes her hands off him.

JJ chews on the information she’s given him, tracing his fingers down her arm, over the curve of her elbow and back up to her shoulder. “You’re still gonna go home, right?” He asks, uncertainty and maybe longing in his voice. She realizes, then, that of course she is. Her parents love her, even if they don’t know how to show it, don't understand what the Cut and its inhabitants (and one in particular) mean to her. Of course, she’s going to go home. Because JJ doesn’t get to. Because she still can.

If she’d had this conversation with anyone else, there would be stomping and cursing and yelling, indignant demands as to why her parents can’t understand her, why they can’t see how they suffocate her, and hold her down. But this is JJ, who doesn’t get to have problems like this, who doesn’t get to have parents that love him or watch him too closely. At least if Luke Maybank threatened to send JJ to boarding school, it would mean that he cared about JJ’s future. It would mean that he’d looked at his son, spoken to him, seen the anger and hurt and desperation to be seen. It would mean, at least, that he was paying attention.

“Yeah,” she says. She’s still scared, of being powerless to control what they want her to do with her life, of being seventeen and helpless. But she’s not going to say that out loud, not when JJ knows what that feels like on a level she can’t even comprehend. He feels like he should say more, and part of her wants him to, but JJ’s always been shit at comforting. This, his presence, is enough. His light touches, his lips pressed to her hairline -- it’s all he has to do. When she starts to nod off, she asks him to hand her her phone, and stumbles out to the porch to dig in her bag for it. She curls on her side, sends a text to her mom about being sorry and that she’ll be home in a few hours, and then sets an alarm for thirty minutes before curfew.

She’ll go home, but she’s going to spend as much time with him as she can. She still doesn’t think he should be alone, and she doesn’t want to be either. He fits himself in behind her, his chest pressed to her back, one arm under her neck, the other tight around her waist. They don’t talk. She doesn’t want to and he doesn’t know what he’d say. She’s exhausted and warm and JJ’s arms around her feel a little bit like armor, like when he’s holding her, the rest of the world can’t get in. Just before she falls asleep, he squeezes her tight, tucking his face into her neck.

“You aren’t going to boarding school,” he whispers. “I promise.” She feels his lips press against her skin. She wants to turn in his arms, kiss him slow and sweet and kind, the way he deserves to be loved. But sleep tugs at her, unrelenting. Just before she slips under the waves, she hears him whisper one more thing.

“I won’t let them take you away from me.”

#jiara #outer banks #jj/kiara #kiara/jj #jj x kiara #kiara x jj #jj maybank #kiara carrera #jiara fic #fanfiction #fic #fanfic #smut #jiara smut #my stuff #my writing

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klarolinedrabbles · 5 years ago

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What are some of the tvd to fandoms greatest hits so to speak... I was only in it for a short time and then jumped out because I couldn't stand to

Oh, well allow me to be your guide. This will be under a read more because I already know, I’m gonna write a whole essay. Shout out to my ride or die @hellsbellschime.

I don’t think any overtly crazy happened during the good!TVD years. No wait, I’m lying.

The year the spin-off got announced, I believe it was tvguide, that posted an article with like info tidbits for currently airing shows. And one of them, was that Hayley was pregnant with Klaus’ kid. I remember this shit so clearly, man. Everyone was so confused. And then they were like SURPRISE, APRIL FOOLS. Because it was in fact April 1st. So ha-ha we all had a laugh, great. Fastforward to what, late April? Episode 4x20 airs, and it’s exactly what happened???

That whole day btw, the day the backdoor pilot for TO aired was just insanity. I’ll say that about a lot of days in this answer, but that day was really just something else. Like we were delirious, that’s the only way I can explain what happened on here. It was a nightmare but also one of the funniest night’s I’ve ever spent on here. I gotta go back for old time’s sake and reblog some of the shit from that night because we all snapped. And not in the good way.

The TVD 100th. Now, we knew Joseph was coming back for that episode so they hype was real. Because up until that point, we’d gotten a huge load of nothing in regards to Klaroline. They released a trailer, a short one, that’s still in my favorites folder on youtube to this day. I rewatch it all the time because it’s iconic. And there was literally .002 seconds of Klaroline. It’s Caroline standing and then Klaus says “hello, caroline” and everyone lost their shit so much when it dropped that ‘hello caroline’ trended ww on twitter.

THE DAY THE NETWORK THAT AIRED TVD IN AUSTRALIA AIRED A PROMO WITH THE KLAROLINE KISS IN 5X11. ICONIC. I literally woke up, logged on at around 11 AM my time, and my dashboard was on fire. It was the BEST. We didn’t know wtf to do, it was amazing.

Paleyfest. Ohhhh buddy, lemme tell ya. So TVD/TO got chosen to have the CW panel’s at Paleyfest that year. Everyone was on a bit of edge because TO to that point was what, almost done with S1 and Klaroline had been given the mega cold-shoulder despite being the very thing other than the Mikaelson’s that got used to lure people in? After the pregnancy plot from hell, everyone was ready to peace tf out, but we got halted because it was a ‘ohh of course it’s gonna continue’ then they tried to nip Klaroline in the bud with 5x11 and no one was having it. So Paleyfest was where we were gonna get some ANSWERS, DAMMIT. I live on the east coast and the festival was held in the west coast so I wasn’t awake when it was happening. I remember making a post about how ‘going to sleep, and hoping when I woke up the answers were good.’. So I went to sleep, woke up a few hours later like 2-3 AM my time, and checked my blog and the first message I had was ‘don’t wake up stephanie, everything is a mess, stay asleep where everything’s fine’ I—

The gist of that was, they basically set JoMo up to be the bad-cop in shutting down Klaroline. He gave this long answer that made absolutely zero sense. The girl who asked the question about Klaroline, who was like 13 at the time, got called a bully for even asking a question at an event she paid to be at. A mess. And JP was like NO CROSSOVERS, ORGANIC, BLAH BLAH. And Paul was sitting next to her going “why can’t the show’s just intersect”, he was right and he said it.

I can’t remember if this was S1 or S2, but somebody tweeted something and Carina replied ‘when you’re found dead in your basement with klaroline written on you this is why’ or something like that, that was a ~fun~ night. And then like half an hour later she was like “I’m sorry, I’ll never tweet about Klaroline again just leave me alone” if you’ve ever seen this fandom refer to ourselves as basement dwellers, this night is why.

NARDUCCI. Can’t forget him. Talk about a man who just didn’t get it. And I don’t mean Klaroline, he just didn’t get anything, nothing in his head has ever clicked, I’m convinced. He used to pick fights on twitter repeatedly. Admitted once that he missed his flight because he was on twitter…arguing with a fan. AND ONE DAY, he decided to just—snap. Went on this hours long tirade against the Klaroline fandom, essentially calling everyone stupid because no one was appreciating the ‘art’ of the show. So when I say it lasted hours, I mean that. Now, you’d think, that he would be done, right? WELL, apparently that wasn’t enough, so the next day, he continued. I remember because I was in this gc on whatsapp, and I remember Erika sending a message to the gc going “omg, Narducci vs KCers round 2″ when I tell you I screamed. The man went on a two-day rampage against this fandom and it was insane.

S6/S2 of TVD/TO was not a fun time. I can genuinely say it was borderline a chore to come on here during that time. It wasn’t fun, every day someone was in argument with someone from production on twitter. Truly the worst year of the fandom, imo. So S7/S3 rolls around and that’s where shit went nuclear.

Hillary and I, are minding our own damn business, when someone come’s to us with information regarding the new seasons. This was post-SDCC, so it’s like the lull of September, waiting for the seasons to start in October. And we get approached with information, talkin bout how Caroline’s gonna be pregnant with Alaric’s twins in S7. When I tell you we didn’t know wtf to do. And we had to like wait on confirmation about it but then we found out it was legit and we were pissed. Literally ask us if we wanted to be in the spoiler game, the answer is no tf we did not. And she and I basically spent two days complaining. LIKE UGHHHH WE DON’T WANNA DO THIS, BUT ALSO THIS IS DISGUSTING, WE CAN’T JUST LET THEM SPRING THIS ON EVERYONE, BUT AGHH WHY US. So we chose collectively, as a duo, because das my other half yo, to blab.

That went over as best as anyone could hope for it to go. Now, flashforward yet again, this time to around late Novemeber/December. I had been sent word that something was going down. TVD/TO lost their Thursday slots and got bumped to Friday’s, so a plan was going on, and they made one. We’d heard that they were rearranging something mid-season because they were gonna make a crossover work, publicly we found out it would be Paul and JoMo that crossover back-to-back. THEN ONE NIGHT—I call it black friday bc that day was a fucking mess—, a friend of mine was friends with an SCer, I wanna say, and she was hearing word that the crossover did have Klaus and Caroline interact via phone call, but that it was very definitively an ending. Because they spoke about Camille and Stefan, etc, etc. Like a closing of the book type thing. So okay, we were like devastated, everyone on twitter was losing their shit. Everyone was pissed, and @-ing the writers all these crazy, sad things, we were a wreck. Ask Hillary about this night because she, I remember, describes it as ‘logging on and reading what everyone else had and not understanding why tf everyone was mad about it’. It was the first and last time that our roles were reversed, and bless her for it.

SO WE’RE SITTING THERE, it’s Saturday, and we kept getting more information and we were like…something isn’t right here. So we did a bit of digging, spoke to a few people and waited it out. LO AND BEHOLD, everything we’d heard about the phone call was false. There was a phone call but the CKers and SCers were so mad about what was actually said in it, that a few of em, ring leaders of the feeble minded, made up a version and passed it around their fandoms as legit till it eventually worked it’s way over to us. So we all jumped the gun on fake information, lmfskdnknsks. Rumor has it, you can still hear Hillary yelling ‘I told you so’ at me through our group chat.

So all was well, I couldn’t tell everyone why not to panic, just that they didn’t need to. Until, this account popped up called tvdspoiler or something on twitter, also saying false information about the phone call. Sending everyone into a panic yet again. I remember this because I was at kmart with my mom, and the kmart by my house was in a basement so I had no cell service. I was able to send like a couple of messages, and was basically like ‘tell everyone to chill, I’ll clear it up when I get home’ did that in like a couple of hours cause then I had to leave to the midnight showing of the force awakens with my friends. So that day was chaotic, but fun. It was the first time I reached 99+ messages on my inbox, lmao.

So that all happened like a good while before we actually saw the episode. But cut to a few weeks later. I woke up at 1 AM my time to drink water, was on tumblr trying to go back to sleep. I checked my inbox and there was this bizarre message talking about ‘got some scoop’ and they were like ‘Finn dies in 3x17, Aurora gets put into some weird sleeping spell in 3x18, Camille and Davina die in 3x19, Lucien dies in 3x20′ and I quite literally laughed??? Literally who wouldn’t. Like who tf would ever believe TO had the balls to do all of that when they never killed anyone off. AND, WHO WOULD BELIEVE THAT SOMEONE WOULD JUST STOP BY, SHARE IT AND LEAVE. So I sent a screenshot to Hillary and was like ‘yo did you get this because wtf’. We often got duplicate messages. And we often got messages of people who were pissed about the two previous times we, from the klaroline fandom of all places, had legit info that wound up being true, that they were just waiting for us to fuck up. So we used to get messages of people pretending they were sharing info, and it was just antis trying to make us look stupid.

SO, Hillary says ‘just answer it because it’s obviously fake’ top ten moments before disaster. I answer it and am like oh haha, and where did that info come from. And they came back like a minute later, saying ‘I have a source’ THEN THEY ELABORATED. They mentioned that Lucien drags Freya and Vincent to Mystic Falls to do this spell with some bullet and etc. So at that point we were like fUCK because that same day we’d found out was in 3x16, which ended with Lucien and this white-oak bullet, having kidnapped Freya. And that’s when we knew, that someone showed up in the middle of the night, spoiled the whole back-half of TO S3—and then left.

The back-half of S3 was so fun??? Every week the info just kept coming true. On the wikia everyone hated me, probably the most anti messages I ever had was during that time, honestly it was great, 10/10 would recommend.

THEN, at some point in our blog history, Hillary had been getting quite a few messages about PT. And she had this fucking line in one of the messages about Phoebe’s pronunciation with her accent for the show, or lack thereof. And she said “weeches and woves will always have a place in my heart” SO THEM PHOEBE TWEETED IT. THAT EXACT LINE, and we were like was she...? So we shrugged off okay. A few days later, she tweeted “hellsbellschime enough, there’s plenty of other things to watch on tv, I hear mad men’s great.” And I—

THIS WAS ON SOME RANDOM ASS SUNDAY. Like I was lounging around, waiting for the new episode of game of thrones and then WHAM, chaos. AND AS IF THAT WASNT ENOUGH, Leah joined in too. Putting a target on my friends back...about her blog that no one was making them read. You can’t make that shit up. And Jenn actually replied to Phoebe’s tweet and got a reply back, and she was all “you’re right, I’m sorry” and then deleted the original tweet, which I still have a screenshot of btw. And then Leah showed up in Hillary’s inbox with this ridiculous three part ask about how she shouldn’t criticize women in the acting industry because of how hard it is for women in that industry which is true, but it doesn’t make you exempt from criticism??? So not sure where she meant to go with that one.

SO THERE WE HAVE IT, our fandom’s greatest hits. I’m sure I can elaborate and insert more, but I’ve been typing for a good 40 minutes.

Told ya, I wrote a whole dissertation, lmaooo.

#Stephanie talks fandom #klaroline #Anonymous

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moodyoranged · 4 years ago

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ballard girls <3<3

who has known each other the longest? hadley and faith actually. they both grew up in ballard, and had ties to the boys group that had them hanging out. i think this group differes from ballard boys in that they kind of linked up in college and weren’t like lifelong friends like the guys (though some of them did know each other before then)

favorite things to do together/hang out spots? they also just like to hang and talk for the most part. i think they’re the type to do little crafts and activities together too. maybe bake. they like going out more than the boys do but they also love hanging out at hadley’s parent’s place or austin and camryn’s place a lot too

who texts the gc the most? oh they all feel like excessive texters. i’d say probably hadley maybe camryn they just feel the most extra about something like that but faith always politely replies and tayla and anna both put their two cents in.

who never answers calls/texts? jade on account of the twins faye on account of being a hot bitch with other shit to do.

who’s the best at keeping secrets? faith or tayla. maybe faye. they just all feel like they would either be sympathetic to why you would want to keep something a secret OR just understand the concept enough to do you that solid.

who’s the worst at keeping secrets? hadley. i love you baby girl but that’s not your super power. anna i got my eye on too.

who’s the designated driver? again i think they take turns. faith if i had to say ends up there the most because she’s a goody girl but they give her a break if girlie ever wants to let loose she deserves it.

who’s the funniest? oh well its hard because i love them but idk if any of them are exactly Comedians... i could see maybe tayla or faye having some jokes

who’s the most boring? none of them are boring they’re all amazing.... jade is boring in the sense that she’s a mom now and she has to be home by 9pm so her mom can go to sleep because she works very early :pensive:

traditions? i think they have more little traditions than like big ones ( even though their yearly christmas party and secret santa gift exchange is a little bit iconic you are dealing with a group of people here who don’t have an off button when it goes to being cute amazing friends who don’t have an off button with gift giving ). but anyways they’re like the kind of people to have monthly outings and celebrate all their little benchmarks and having different little traditions they’ve carried since college. they’re like a sorority but they weren’t they were just an insane friend group that thinks their bi-yearly no-partners-allowed lakeside getaways are their god given right.

worst falling out? i think they don’t have fallings out just mostly little spats. like you said anna and hadley have the potential to get on each other’s nerves and i think jade did feel the need to confront them when she felt like they were moving on from being her friend. but like they’re good at having a come to jesus moment and resolving their problems quick after they come up

who is the closest? i think camryn is very close with hadley and faith in different ways like we’ve talked about how their dynamics are different but they’re something of a trio. beyond that idk i think in my brain i make tayla and anna close and then jade falls in a little more with them. and then faye and tayla and camryn feel like another close little group but ultimately beyond camryn hadley and faith i think they work best as one big friend group they just compliment each other well as we’ve discussed hardcore tonight

who is the least close? hadley and anna. as established they just cannot be alone together they have to be in a larger group or at least have camryn sitting between them to work

best potential couple? hadley and faye gay!hadley rise and tbh i think getting wifed up by a girl boss would do her some good.

worst potential couple? not to keep resorting to hadley and anna but. it’s right there. gay!hadley but in a way where her life becomes worse and we cannot have that.

who has kissed? again i think like they’ve maybe kissed in a cute girl friends in a selfie way or like pecking for spin the bottle/other party games. i don’t think any of them have really kissed kissed in a context outside of these

who has hooked up? again i think none of them i think unless you have some headcanons i haven’t heard about.

who are most likely to hook up that haven’t already? these are boring friend groups for these last few q’s because they are a little strictly platonic like they’re just best girl friends for real and idk if any of them are exceptionally likely to hook up.

@loveback

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whitleyschn33 · 5 years ago

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What if Whitley is secretly just a fusion of Allister and Bede from Pokémon sword and shield? XD on a more serious note what if Whitley had a froslass that his mother gave him?

Are you a psychic?

Because a couple days before I got this ask (which was weeks ago, I know, and I’m very sorry, things have been insane), I started a new Nuzlocke run of Pokemon Shield, and for kicks and giggles because of the “Whitley the Pokemon Trainer” stuff that’s been going around, I made my avatar Whitley, and of course started trying to figure out how a RWBY/Shield AU would work out.

I realized halfway through my plotting that Whitley honestly does fit Bede more than who I cast him as, but a) I wanted him to start at the same place the player does, and b) it’s my AU, so who cares?

Whitley is the younger brother of the current champion, Weiss Schnee, who became champion 2/3 years ago after leaving home to complete the Gym Challenge. Winter, the eldest Schnee sister, left home nearly a decade ago, and wound up as Galar’s Ice Gym Leader. Whitley has remained behind with their mother in their estate outside Postwick.

Willow is neglectful, an alcoholic that spends more time than not drunk in her rooms. Jacques, an abusive jackass and also a business partner of Chairwoman Salem, usually works from home, but during the lead-up and during challenge season, moves to an apartment in Wyndon to focus on the extra work sent his way. This is Whitley’s favorite time of the year, as it gives him the most freedom to leave the estate and go into the nearby towns of Postwick and Wedgehurst.

Oscar Pine and Ruby Rose are the closest things to friends Whitley has, who he visits when he gets the chance to escape his house.

Oscar is Ruby’s cousin - her mother, Summer Rose, is Oscar’s aunt, who Oscar came to live with after his parents were killed in a freak train accident when he was fairly young. Oscar helps Summer with the Budew and Wooloo they breed, farming flowers and wool and selling both in Wedgehurst.

Ruby is the granddaughter of noted Pokemon Professor, Professor Ozpin, and currently works as his assistant while she tries to figure out what she wants to do with her life. Ruby was one of the four rookie challengers that made it into the finals of the Gym Challenge season that saw Weiss become champion, despite being two years younger, but lost against her sister in an early bracket.

Ruby’s half-sister Yang is Galar’s Fighting Gym Leader, taking the role on after making it fairly far in the finals of the gym challenge.

Whitley and Oscar often hang around the Pokemon Lab with Ruby, taking advantage of all the interesting tech and books, as well as the comforting atmosphere. Professor Ozpin works from home a majority of the time, but comes by often enough to recognize Whitley as his grandchildren’s friend and pick up enough hints about his home life.

Close to the beginning of the new Gym Challenge season (called GCS from here on out), Ozpin invites the three of them to his home on Route 2, Ruby guiding them with her Yamper Zwei for protection.

Once there, Ozpin offers to sponsor both Oscar and Whitley in this year’s GCS, and give both of them a starting Pokemon. Oscar’s thrilled, having wanted to venture out into Galar for a while now to learn more, but Whitley is far less so, hesitant to leave his mother alone and terrified of his father’s reaction if/when he found out.

Ozpin assures him there’s no pressure - the Pokemon is his regardless of whether or not he chooses to take on the challenge, so he should just focus on getting to know his chosen Pokemon before deciding.

Oscar lets him go first, since this will be Whitley’s first Pokemon, while he’s had his own Wooloo before.

Whitley considers the Sobble for the matching aesthetics, but realizes he’s probably isn’t patient enough to deal with the constant crying. He settles for Grookey, having at least had a bit of experience with grass-types from visiting Oscar’s Budews. Oscar takes the Sobble.

A small barbecue/party is held at Ozpin’s place, then everyone heads back to Postwick. Whitley takes the Grookey home, and despite being perpetually drunk or hungover, even Willow can’t miss her son bringing home a Pokemon. Reluctantly, Whitley tells her about the professor’s offer, and Willow goes quiet, wandering off to think and leaving Whitley to bond with his Grookey. (In my playthrough, I got a female Grookey I named Rhya - what do you all think Whitley would name his?)

Nearly a week later, the night before Whitley’s heading out to give his answer to the professor, Willow comes to him to give him her blessing and supplies - a mix of her own, Winter’s, and Weiss’ - in the form of a map, money, a hat, a Bag (a case that acts like a Box, but for items rather than Pokemon), camping supplies, etc. Whitley’s understandably shocked by all this, and it certainly throws him for a loop on what he’s going to do next.

The next morning, Oscar, Ruby, and he head over to Ozpin’s place. At Ozpin’s request, he and Oscar have a battle that Whitley manages to win. Hopped up on that and spurred on by his mother’s blessing (and some not-so-subtle comments on wanting/needing a rival from Oscar), he accepts the recommendation, agreeing to accompany Oscar as they attempt the GC.

Whitley returns home briefly to pack and say goodbye to his mother, and gets one final gift - an Egg his mother found a while back, presumably from her Froslass and a random Pokemon that had been passing through the Slumbering Weald. (For your headcanon, anon~)

What happens next... would require me finishing my playthrough, and honestly a Nuzlocke probably isn’t the best way to determine what Pokemon Whitley would choose. I may go through again as a non-Nuzlocke, looking at what Pokemon are available that I think would suit Whitley and try to make a team for him. I’ve got plenty of time now.

Miscellaneous

Gym Leaders:

Milo is replaced with Taiyang, who, when not involved with the GCS, focuses on teaching new trainers, recommending the best of the crop to the Gym Challenge.

Nessa is replaced with Ren - a calm trainer whose Pokemon can flow like water around obstacles, or slam into opponents like a wave.

Kabu is replaced with Qrow - a trainer from an older generation trying to improve himself.

Allister is replaced with Neo - a silent Trainer that can disappear seemingly without a trace, known for her Pokemon’s ability to seemingly dodge any hit.

Opal is replaced by Maria - an older woman that seems to have secrets, searching for an apprentice to soon become the new Fairy Gym Leader. Upon meeting Ruby, who shows up to cheer on Oscar and Whitley at their matches, drags her off to convince her to be the next Fairy Gym Leader, muttering something about “having the eyes for it.”

Like said above, Melony is replaced by Winter, who got the job nearly a decade ago. Known for her powerful attacks and well-disciplined Pokemon, even her multiple type disadvantages don’t seem to turn the tides.

Piers is replaced with Blake - a Trainer specializing in dark types that refuses to use Dynamax, concerned about the effects it may have on the Pokemon that use it constantly. She made it to the finals of the GC, but ultimately fell near the end.

Raihan is replaced by Pyrrha - the near-unbeatable crown jewel of the Gym Challenge, the last obstacle before the finals, and the reason so few challengers make it to them. A prodigy of a trainer that took the position at 14, and has come extremely close to dethroning Weiss multiple times during her reign as champion

Others

Jaune is a Normal-type Gym Leader that just took over this year.

Nora is the Electric Gym Leader, nicknamed “the Hammer” for her tendency to oneshot opposing Pokemon with powerful Thunderbolts and Discharges.

Sun takes Marnie’s place - not Blake’s sibling, but someone that cares for her deeply, and does his best to help spread word of her cause by fighting in the Gym Challenge without Dynamax like she did.

Chairman Rose is replaced by Salem - rather than trying to solve the potential energy crisis, she simply wants to destroy the world and remake it in her own image. Cinder replaces Oleana, pulling the strings to set everything in place for Salem’s plan.

Emerald and Mercury are Bede’s substitutes - kids Salem and Cinder fund on the off-chance of being useful for dirty work.

Team Yell does not exist.

And holy shit, this has gotten long, so I’m gonna stop here before I start just flat out writing fanfiction.

But, uh.... yeah, I can very much see Whitley being a part of the Galar region! A Froslass would be a good aesthetic addition to his team - perhaps a companion rather than a competitive Pokemon, since they have so many type weaknesses.

Thank you for this ask! I thoroughly enjoyed my excuse to ramble about an AU that’s been knocking around my head for a while (and can probably be prodded into doing so again).

Have a wonderful day/evening, and stay safe!

#whitley schnee #rwby #pokemon #rwby pokemon au #galar #oscar pine #ruby rose #ask reply #fanfiction

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