#my friend's grandma (who has a house in a nice neighborhood that we decided to meet at for gerard³)

[kerosene-saint]

it's gonna take me so long to get through all these snacks and candy I got last night

[melohax]

Why Basil isn’t “evil” or knowingly manipulative:

Warning: Major MAJOR Omori Spoilers Ahead

When people aren’t saying Sunny is a psychopath who deserves to be in jail, they’re saying Basil is an evil obsessive mastermind who tricked poor dissociating Sunny into defacing his sister’s corpse.

I’ve already explained before why I disagree with either interpretation but I haven’t gone in depth with Basil’s character. I’ll write about why I don’t think Basil is this dark yandere intentionally manipulating Sunny into dependance on him.

Basil is a tragic character with bad abandonment issues who legitimately wants to help the people he loves most. Unfortunately he also happens to have a broken “normalcy compass” (common in abused and/or neglected children). This means his well intentioned actions are often more harmful than helpful.

Aubrey says during a part of the real world segment that outside our main friend group, she’s always been an outcast. I think it’s no accident that we see in Sunny’s memories that she was the one who introduced Basil to the friend group, implying he’s also always been an outcast like her.

With Aubrey though, we can attribute her outcast status to things like living in the poorest neighborhood in Faraway town while also living in the visibly most worn-down house of said poor neighborhood.

Aubrey has a hoarding alcoholic mother that neglects her and a strict father (Aubrey casually mentions as a kid that her father is weirdly strict about her appearance) who ends up abandoning her anyway. Aubrey’s hot temper doesn’t help either and so even though she manages to be popular and well-loved among her hooligan friends, the rest of the town judges her harshly as if she’s at fault for her horrible life circumstances.

Then we have Basil. Basil’s economic circumstances are visibly better than Aubrey’s and he lives in a nice house surrounded by pretty flowers. Yet even with everything around him (even his appearance) looking so prim and cute, he’s still treated as an outcast.

We know that mentally ill children are way too often shunned by their peers and the adults surrounding them for being “weird” even though it’s not their fault that they have different brain chemistry. Without counting the bullying Aubrey carried out with her friends, Basil was already being ostracized by people outside the main friend group. In one of Sunny’s memories, Basil tells them that he’d always been alone before meeting them.

This lets us know that there’s always been “something” that’s made Basil unpopular with almost everyone. We see hints of why in the contrast between Dreamworld Basil and Real Basil. Whereas Dreamworld Basil is well-spoken, charismatic and cheerful, Real Basil is a nervous wreck that is prone to panic attacks and bouts of screaming. We could say he’s this way cus of what he did to Mari but from knowing Basil’s always been an unliked outcast, I get the feeling he’s not like this only from the Mari situation.

Then we have the probable root of his very obvious abandonment issues: Basil’s parents’ are completely absent save for some pictures in his home. Sunny himself has never seen Basil’s parents in person. Datamining apparently suggests his parents abandoned him when he was a toddler. To top it off, having a constantly ill and mostly unresponsive grandma as his only remaining family doesn’t help with his mental health issues at all, either. No wonder the kid’s clingy.

There’s also the caretaker at his house, who is introduced as Basil’s caretaker, not his sick grandmothers. Basil is at the age where he can legally emancipate himself yet we’re shown he still needs a caretaker to look after him. That Basil needs looking after kinda says to me that he has issues he can’t be left alone with.

So all these paragraphs were to explain the evidence that point to Basil likely being mentally ill since before Mari’s death. Now we get to the parts that make me think he’s been suffering from psychosis even as a kid.

12 year old Basil doesn’t seem capable of understanding the concept of Sunny being angry and accidentally shoving Mari down the stairs. He seems unable to consider the possibility that it was an argument between siblings just at the wrong place at the wrong time, as if that just can’t happen. To Basil, it HAS to be “Something” maliciously causing the incident and/or forcing Sunny to do it.

About the Mari incident and Basil’s fucked up idea: I think a lot of fans forget that first, not only was Basil a 12 year old kid back then (not even a teen yet) but also a lot of the reasoning behind many of Basil’s most important actions seems to be rooted in delusions he genuinely believes.

The same thing happens when the photo album was scribbled over: in his mind, there was no way any of his friends (*cough* Sunny) could have done this. It had to be the same “Something” attached both to him and Sunny that decided to ruin the photos. Basil doesn’t seem to remember doing anything to the album at all.

We could say all of this isn’t psychosis but metaphors for extreme denial instead, like the way Sunny decides things that remind him of The Truth don’t exist (like the closet door).

I don’t think this is all there is to it, tho.

Basil throughout the game tries to guide Sunny to the truth both in Headspace and that the time in his bathroom where he tries to talk to Sunny about the Something following them. Too afraid to hear him out, Sunny runs away instead while Basil screams for Sunny not to leave him again.

This shows imo that Basil’s brand of denial isn’t the same as Sunny’s. Sunny escapes into his own head and pretends everything involving the incident is either perpetually frozen in a time before anything bad happened or that it simply does not exist. He’s all about repression and suppression.

Basil on the other hand, acknowledges that the incident happened but he saw a Something committing the act instead of Sunny himself.

Then, the final battle against Basil confirms to me that Basil’s delusions and hallucinations go beyond denial of Sunny’s guilt.

Even when the truth is finally out in the open for the both of them, Basil still insists it’s “Something” that did everything. He attacks Sunny because he genuinely believes he is attacking Something evil and that this will protect Sunny from it. The most important detail to me: Basil slashes or gouges Sunny’s eye out specifically on the side where Somethings eye peeks out from Mari’s hair.

Saddest of all, we’re never shown if Basil ever managed to realize that there was never a monster doing everything. Although we are shown the burden of the secret is gone in that last scene between Sunny and Basil, we don’t know if Basil ever understood that Sunny wasn’t forced by any monster to kill Mari.

There’s more that can be said but this post already got long af lol. My conclusion is that Basil isn’t some evil yandere mastermind. He’s a sad wreck of a teenager who’s always struggled with mental illness, trying to do the best he can for those he loves while being plagued by nearly constant delusions and hallucinations.

Tricking his best friend/love interest isn’t part of Basil’s modus operandi when a lot of times he can barely tell what’s real and what isn’t.

[themonotonysyndrome]

I know you have plans for the winter break already but what if in that time nothing bad happens and the boys invited the girls to their homelands?

Sayaka’s invited by Deuce to go meet his mother as his closest friends (both totally obvious that everyone sees it as guy invites his girlfriend to his mom for the first time). It’d be so wholesome, with Deuce’mom lightly teases them but very grateful that her son managed to befriend a good girl like Sayaka. And since they’re in the Rose Country, they can go meet Ace and the others!

Kyoko probably goes with Ruggie. He’s self-conscious about his poor neighborhood but after all the time they spent together, relating to each other’s hardships they are more comfortable with one another. She’d get along well with everyone there, especially the kids even if she acts grumpy and denies that she cares about them. The sight of everyone in the poor but close-knited community leaves her with a bittersweet feeling as she remembers her family. But hearing Ruggie’s grandma says that if she doesn’t mind she’s welcome to visit them anytime aling with the neighbor kids cheerfully chirping that they want to see nee-chan again warms her heart

(Oohh what if she decides to stay??)

Homura goes with Kalim and Jamil to the Country of Hot Sands, meeting both of them families. She can’t help but feel uncomfortable with how many ppl there are, and she keeps her guard up even more knowing that Kalim’s life could be targeted at any time. Still, witnessing Kalim being a big brother to his siblings (it’s clear that they love him a lot, even if their own mothers want him out of the picture) and how Jamil’s family being more reserved yet clearly shows that they deeply care for him is heartwarming. She’s grateful that they treat her as a precious friend of their sons. For once in her life, she’s able to understand what family love is like. (Kalim’s dad secretly welcomes the idea of having Homura as Kalim’s wife)

Even though Mami is closer to Vil and Rook, I see her going to Epel’s village, partly because we know very little about Vil’s family and nothing about Rook’s. Although she and him are the only teens around, Mami enjoys the peaceful atmosphere and how caring the people there are. Plus watching him freely being himself and being obviously happy around his family brings a smile to her face. It reminds her of her own parents and for a moment she has a solemn expression before snapping out of it to join in the fun with everyone. Even if her duty as Magical Girl will keep her to find a way back, she’s going to cherish all the memories and all the friends she made here in Twisted Wonderland

Madoka would be so out of place in the Valley of Thorns. She’s most likely be the only human there and will be faced with many looks, but Lilia and the others will be by her side no matter what. And even though it’s nerve wrecking to be so far away from her friends the experience of visiting the Diasomnia’s homeland soon fills her with wonder. Once she shows her magic everyone slowly starts to be more welcoming to her.

Let’s give these girls more happiness! I love the idea that the boys bring the girls that sorted into their dorm to their homelands & meet their families! Let’s do this. 

Sayaka would feel a little awkward at first. I mean, a guy has never invited her to meet his family and homeland before! (Kyousuke doesn’t count here). It’ll be funny that both her and Sayaka doesn’t think too much about the invitation, just good friends, right? Everyone else will be like, “Ah, young love! One day these oblivious idiots will realise it, no worries!” Deuce’s mom would definitely be delighted over Sayaka and adores her! She believes that she’s a good girl and friend to her son and if those two combined? She hopes they can continue to support one another. After hanging out with Deuce’s mom and helping out around the house because Sayaka would insist it, they would go out to hang out with Ace and the rest of the Heartslabyul gang too! Cater would probably drop by at the Rose Kingdom too. Sayaka would want to keep close to Riddle in case his mother did anything to him. And for that lady’s sake? Riddle is gonna be a lot more outspoken and independent from his mother lest Sayaka decides to ‘save’ her too. 

Ruggie had sheepishly and hesitantly offer Kyouko if she would like to come home with him during the Winter Break. Kyouko, at first, doesn’t understand why he’s so self-conscious about it until he brought her to the slums and poor neighbourhood. He worries if it’ll put her off, but to his immense relief and pleasant surprise, Kyouko feels at ease. Right at home, in fact. He would internally chastise himself, he remembers that Kyouko used to live on the streets back where she comes from after the death of her family. You bet this girl gets along well everyone in Ruggie’s home. Despite the environment, Kyouko would quietly yet fiercely thanked him for bringing her to meet his grandma and the close-knitted community he lives with. For now, it’s alright to bask in this warm feeling of having a family again. And you know what? These two would also happily accept Leona offers to meet with him in his palace. He’d grumbled about their noisy presence but compared to dealing with the judgemental servants and annoying family members, Leona enjoys having them with him. Kyouko wonders if Jack would like to hang out with them too. 

(wouldn’t it be nice if Kyouko, Mami and even Sayaka will be hesitant to go back to Mitakihara City? They found love, family and acceptance in Twisted Wonderland with these boys. Madoka would be torn about at this point, Lilia has become her second Dad in all but blood and name. And Homura? This is perfect for her; so bittersweet. She would rather have the other girls live her while she goes back to Mitakihara City. Let her deal with Kyuubey & Walpurgisnacht. She’ll gladly face the nightmares if it means Madoka and everyone else can live happily. PS: I was listening to Jungkook’s Still With You so kudos for making myself sad).

At first, Homura is very reluctant to be separated from Madoka. It took not only Madoka & Lilia’s constant assurance that she’ll be safe and sound but also Malleus in a staring competition with Homura that ended with, “Do you look down on my power and capabilities to keep the Fairy safe?” Cue Sebek spluttering and shrieking in the background, being restrained by an exasperated Silver, at how Homura is underestimating his young master. In the end, she takes up on Kalim’s invitation to the Land of Hot Sands. She’s gotten used to the weather, clothes and culture practice in Scarabia, so adapting to the Land of Hot Sands is not a problem for her. But yes, she definitely feels uncomfortable with how large the Al-Asim family is! Her guards are constantly up despite the warm welcome she receives; she makes sure to be polite though, after all, she is a guest in their home?? Manor?? Palace?? Yeah. She’s cautious and friendly to his Dad, his mother and the other wives but a bit more relax towards Kalim’s siblings. Even the older ones. I feel that she’s patient to their questions and invitations to play. Homura also takes the time to visit Jamil and his reserved family. She never bothered by status before so like Sayaka, she would offer her help around their house too. All in all, I think both families would thank her for looking out for their sons. It’ll be funny if the night before they went back to NRC, Kalim’s dad pull him aside, telling him he approves if he wants to make Homura his wife. We don’t know if Homura even has a family in the anime so it’s a nice to experience what being in a family feels like. (Let’s just hope neither family ever discover the extent she would do to bring back a dead Kalim, yes?). 

Oh! Oh! I think that’s a good idea! Having Epel inviting Mami to the Village of Harvest. Mami portrays herself as a high-class, sort of noble lady with her fancy teas, ladylike-behaviour and expensive looking apartment, but you know? She’s more than happy to help him around the farm! The serene and quiet atmosphere is a breath of fresh air to her. She’s charming the old ladies and gentlemen left and right with her beautiful smiles and sweet demeanour! Mami would giggle and keep it herself that it’s nice to see Epel slip back to his country accent and let loose without having to worry about Vil breathing down his neck. His family are so welcoming of her that she’s super touched and thanked Epel for bringing her to his home. I want Vil to often call Mami to ask if Epel is treating her right and that would lead him asking her to pass the phone to him and poor Epel complaining that even back home, he can’t run away from Vil! What is this nightmare!? Rook would just one day randomly appear without warning, scaring Mami and Epel. 

If Madoka stands out in Diasomnia, she will definitely look out of place in Malleus’ castle and the Valley of Thorns! The only human around dark Faes, bright pink against black, a sweet thing among reserved and secretive society. I think Malleus’ castle would only be filled with those who he truly trust so she can roam around without worry, though whispers and gossips will sure travel across the land that their Prince finally brought a friend home! And a human, too! Cue of the castle staffs, guards and etc wondering about Madoka. She’ll ease into the scrutiny with Lilia and Silver besides her. As for Malleus? He’s just super excited to show her around, have sleepovers and etc. So precious! 

[agustdmono]

NEIGHBORS; jhs Oneshot (M)

Pairing(s): Jung Hoseok x Reader

Summary: A new family arrived in your neighborhood. You were determined to befriend their one and only son. You definitely weren’t ready for what the boy had in store for you.

Word Count: 9.6K+

Genre(s): ONESHOT! Mature (18+), Smut, bts AU (Boy Next Door Hoseok)

Caution(s): Slight dom!Reader, Slight dom!Hoseok, swearing, dry humping, lots of foreplay, oral (Y/N receives), oral (Hoseok receives), fingering, choking, unprotected sex, multiple orgasms

Author’s Note: We’re back _:(´ཀ`」 ∠):_

You were distraught.

Nothing in the world could ever replace your love for your ex-neighbor: Grandma Margaret. She wasn’t related to you in any way, but you still called her grandma. You’ll miss the cookies that she bakes exactly at 1:23 PM or the smiles she gives you whenever she sits on her front porch. For your twentieth birthday, she gave you her old vinyl player and you cried. Literally.

“Y/N, dear, I’m just a few houses down,” Margaret chuckled.

“I know, but neighbors are special,” you sniffled, placing your hand on your chest to add a dramatic effect.

She rolled her eyes at your actions, but you knew she was amused. It didn’t take very long for you to get along with her. She had a similar personality to yours―basically an older version of you.

“I’m still your neighbor, hon,” she spoke before taking a small sip from her tea.

“No! The point is, you ain’t next to me.”

The two of you sat on the chairs in the gazebo at the front of your house, casually conversing about what’s been going on. She informed you that your new neighbors should be coming in today and you whined, earning a small smack from her cane. Honestly, you’ll even miss getting whacked by her cane.

“Come walk me back. Enjoy my company while you can .”

Of course, you complied. You got up as you held out your arm for her to grab. Both of you managed to climb down the stairs before a moving truck drove past your house and parked on the vacant house’s driveway. You ignored the sound of doors slamming because you were too focused on bringing Margaret home, but for some reason, she wasn’t budging.

“You should welcome your new neighbors, Y/N.”

You looked at her with pleading eyes, hinting that you really don’t want to meet new people just yet. You still had to leave time to mope about not seeing her as much as you want to. She threateningly raised her cane; which caused you to raise your hands in defeat. You jogged towards the opened cargo and saw two men lifting a couch out of the vehicle. Not wanting to distract them, you waited until they placed the heavy object down at the bottom of the ramp.

“Hello, I’m Y/N L/N! Your neighbor on the right-hand side,” you greeted, trying to seem as cheery as possible.

You looked over at Margaret, who was eyeing you and gave her the thumbs up. You’re only doing this for her in all honesty. It’s not like you’re going to experience a whole ‘boy next door’ type of thing. Those things only exist in movies. Right?

“Ah! Hi there! I’m Jung Junsu and this is my son, Hoseok,” the older looking male draped his arms over Hoseok, who had trouble making eye contact with you.

He was shy, but it didn’t bother you at all. In fact, it made you more curious about the male. Once he finally lifted his head up to look at you, he flashed you a shy yet bright smile. You swore that your heart fell out of your chest. He’s a good looking guy and you weren’t prepared for this moment since you were currently wearing your favorite Kookie slippers.

“Jung Hoseok. Hope we can be friends,” he spoke, slightly bowing his head.

“The feeling is mutual,” you beamed. “Do you guys need help? I just need to walk Granny back to her home; so, I’ll be able to lend a hand right after.”

“Actually, we’d appreciate that. My wife needs a hand with the kitchen utensils.”

“No problem. I’ll be back soon.”

You quickly ran back to Margaret, who was fiddling with her cane. You told her what had happened and she was pleased. She mentioned Hoseok and you couldn’t stop babbling about how cute he was and how his smile nearly blinded you. Both of you finally reached her new home, giving her a long hug before you left to help your new neighbors.

“And here’s when Hoseok dressed himself up for the first time,” Mrs. Jung smiled fondly as she pointed at the young boy in the photo album.

You almost cooed at the photo. He was wearing blue jeans and a bright yellow shirt with mixed-match shoes. You could see how proud he must have felt by the way he was posing in the photo.

“Oh! Let me show you when he took a bath and he-”

“Mom! I think she’s seen enough,” Hoseok snatched the photo book before she could lay her hands on it.

The pink tint on his cheeks was evident and you let out a soft chuckle. His mom rolled her eyes but spared him the embarrassment for the day.

“Just come after your classes and I’ll show it to you, Y/N,” she winked as she got up from the couch and headed for the kitchen, but she halted in her steps. “Will you be joining us for dinner?”

You looked at the clock and jumped from your seat. You were so immersed in helping their family that you completely lost track of time. It was already a couple of minutes past seven. The skies were dark and the stars were coming out. Is your mom gonna lecture your ass? Yes. Was it worth it? Hell yeah.

“I’m sorry, maybe next time? My mom is gonna kill me for not being home the whole day without letting her know,” you couldn’t help but bow since you knew it was an appropriate way to show how apologetic you were.

“Of course! You’re welcomed here anytime, Y/N,” she turned back towards you and gave you a hug; which you reciprocated. “You were a big help today, you must let us thank you someday.”

You almost wanted to cry at how welcoming and friendly the family was. They’ll never replace Grandma Margaret, but you definitely don’t mind them. You quickly bidded goodbye to Junsu before leaving their house. Hoseok, being the gentleman, walked you to the door. You slipped on your slippers and without thought, you hugged him goodbye. He froze on the spot, unclear of what to do; so he patted your back. You weren’t offended at the gesture. In fact, you found it amusing at how unsure he seemed.

“I’ll be seeing you around, neighbor,” you smiled, before making your way towards your house.

Once you reached your door, you turned back to make sure he headed back inside. Much to your surprise, he was standing by the van with his arms crossed over his chest. He wanted to make sure you reached your doorstep safely. Your eyes locked with one another and he shyly waved at you before he jogged back to his door. You heard his door slam and that was your cue to head in.

What a nice fucking guy.

Just after one meeting, you were already swooned by Jung Hoseok.

School.

You dreaded school.

Just the word school, made you want to throw yourself off a cliff, but that’s not the point. The real question is whether Hoseok is attending your school or not. A small part of you hoped he would be.

Okay, maybe a big part of you hoped.

Just to be clear, you don’t have feelings for the male. You’re simply curious and you wanted to know more about him. You already set a goal for yourself: befriend Jung Hoseok. It doesn’t seem impossible since you’ve already earned the trust of his family. You just needed him to trust you.

You followed your morning ritual: brushed your teeth, washed your face, and combing your hair. Of course, you had to check the weather for today. That’s crucial because you didn’t want to make the same mistake again when you wore a sweater in ninety-degree weather. You unlocked your phone and tapped on the weather app.

“Sunny,” you read out loud.

You were hoping to wear one of your hoodies, but the weather has spoken. You grabbed some jean shorts from your closet and threw on a shirt. The boys at your school didn’t really catch your eye; so, there wasn’t really anybody to impress. Before you head to the kitchen, you wanted a small amount of sunlight to light up your room. You walked towards the curtains and pushed them apart a tiny bit.

“There ya g―Shit!”

You jumped at the sight of Mr. Jung on the other side of the window. Thankfully, he was just talking to his wife. Nothing more than that. You recollected yourself, finally walking out of the room.

It’s only in the movies. Hoseok’s room wouldn’t be the one adjacent to yours. What did you expect?

“Spill. Hot neighbor or not?”

You looked at your best friend with confusion. She literally appeared out of nowhere and sat in the seat next to you while you were just trying to enjoy your snack before the professor walks in.

“What are yo―oh, you mean the Jung’s?”

“Judging by the last name, I’ll take that as a yes,” F/N concluded as she nodded her head.

“He’s cute,” you continued. “I wouldn’t say hot.”

“Just wait.”

Sometimes you questioned her intuition, but you decided to let it go. Hoseok is cute. He is literal sunshine. He has a smile that makes you want to coo at him, not devour his mouth. You decided that he was adorable, not hot. Nothing more, nothing less.

“How’s the progress with your boy, Min Yoongi?” You smirked.

“It’s getting…somewhere?”

“And?”

“We’re getting coffee during our two-hour break in between class,” she explained as if it wasn’t a big deal.

“Bro. Just ask him out already.”

“Patience is a virtue, Y/N.”

You scoffed at her comment. The professor finally arrived and you were already falling asleep thirty minutes into the session. You looked over at your best friend, who was watching a movie on her laptop. She looked at you and winked before focusing back on her screen. Instead of doing the same, you decided to leave class to go for a stroll.

The campus was practically empty. You enjoyed the peace and quiet for once. Sometimes the place was loud and bustling with fellow students, but not this time. Placing your earphones into your ears, you continued to walk down the concrete path. Your eyes were too focused on the ground and you didn’t notice somebody walking right into your lane. You two bumped shoulders and you turned to see who it was. 

Hoseok.

“I-I’m so sorry. I didn’t see whe—oh, hello.”

“Hey there, neighbor. You lost?” You asked cooly.

“How did yo—“

“You’re the only person I’ve seen on campus right now. Meaning, everyone’s in class and you’re not.”

“What about you?” He asked, beet red.

“Taking a leisurely stroll, thank you very much.”

He grunted at your answer, but he seemed conflicted. You couldn’t let a lonely person roam aimlessly around campus.

“What’s the room number?” You questioned.

“Oh, um, H-208.”

“Come, come, I shall take you there!”

You began to walk towards the room and he hurriedly followed behind you. The silence between you two was steadily increasing the awkward tension.

“What class is this?” You asked, finally breaking the silence.

“Dance,” he answered right away.

This piqued your interest. A boy who dances? Oh man, that’s like wishing on a shooting star: rare as fuck.

“That’s really cool, not a lot of guys do that nowadays.”

“I’m really passionate about it. I enjoy hip-hop the most.”

The two of you easily conversed with one another. You guys would jump from topic to topic and there was a lack of silence. You were relieved at how quickly he opened up to you. Mentally, you pat yourself on the back. Sadly, the conversation had to come to an end as the two of you reached the entrance of his class.

“Here’s your stop.”

“Thanks a lot, I owe you one.”

“Ahh, it’s no big deal,” you shrugged. “I gotta head back to class now. I’ve been gone for thirty minutes already.”

You turned your heels and began heading back towards your class. You heard a voice, so you turned back around to see who it was.

“Y-You’re fun to talk to and thanks for keeping me company,” he smiled before pushing the door open.

Thump.

“Well, shit.”

“And I said, you need some sugar for your coffee? Because I’m what you need,” your best friend explained.

“You have balls.”

“I’m deter—oh wow, he got some looks.”

You looked to see who your best friend was talking about.

It was Hoseok, leaning against the building while his attention was on his phone. Your best friend wasn’t wrong. You’re surprised that you didn’t notice his black button-up rolled halfway up his forearm or his black skinny jeans that showed off his muscular legs. How could you have missed the important part of his being?

His long wavy hair that fits him so damn perfectly.

Hot damn.

“Hot damn is right.”

“Oh fuck, I said that out loud?”

“Loud and clear,” F/N laughed. “You said he was cute. Now I call bullshit.”

“How’d you know that’s Hoseok?”

“I didn’t, but now I do~!”

You wanted to smack your damn forehead. The two of you kept bickering, but mostly her making fun of your crush for Hoseok.

Wait.

No, it’s definitely not a crush. He’s just a good looking guy who has a heart of gold. You were too busy trying to convince yourself that you don’t like Hoseok to the point where you didn’t notice him walking towards you two. F/N had to smack you out of your thoughts and you were ready to smack her back until you finally noticed him. You immediately put your fist down and smiled at him.

“Y/N! I was waiting for you,” he beamed.

“He was fucking waiting for you,” F/N whispered in your ear; which resulted in your hand colliding with her arm.

“Oh? What for?” You asked, genuinely confused.

“I thought we should walk home together. It would be nice to have someone to talk to,” he offered.

“Take her, please,” F/N pushed you towards him. “I love you, text me when you get home.”

With that, she ran away at the speed of light. Curse her and her running skills. You looked at him while he looked right back at you. How did you not notice his deep brown eyes or his jawline that could slice an iron bar? Okay, exaggerating, but it really seems like it’s possible. Especially for him. Don’t you just hate when friends point out something that you’ve been missing this whole time?

“Ready when you are,” he spoke up.

You nodded and led the way.

“You should come over for dinner later,” he suggested.

Both of you were standing by your front door. His suggestion nearly threw you off, but you definitely weren’t against the idea because you’d be stupid for rejecting free food. Specifically, Korean food.

“Maybe! I gotta ask my mom first,” you answered back.

You swore you saw his smile faltered for a second, but you decided to brush it off and not question it. He watched as you unlocked the door to your house. You couldn’t help but feel nervous. Your heart was beating fast and you didn’t know why. You finally managed to get the door open, so you turned towards him and waved before heading inside.

“W-Wait!”

“Yeah?”

“Let’s exchange numbers, so um, you can text me if you decide to join us.”

You blinked once, then you blink twice because you had to process what he just told you. He wanted your number and you weren’t sure about how to handle that. If you get his number, then you can text him anytime you want. Unless he only texts for dinner purposes only. Once again, you tried not to think too much about it. It’s not like you were excited or anything. It’s just a number.

“Yeah, sure,” you said cooly, trying to hide your excitement.

He handed you his phone and you did the same. You both typed in your phone numbers and gave back the devices. You would hug him to bid him goodbye, but after your best friend pointed out how handsome he was, you hesitated. Your heart was doing flips in your chest, but you’re sure it’s not because you have a crush on him. It’s only because he’s a good looking man. Right?

“Make sure to text me,” he spoke up as he pulled you into a hug.

“Y-Yeah, of course.”

He pulled away and headed back to his house. You finally stepped inside your house and ran to your room. Tossing your backpack aside, you sat at your desk and contemplated whether you should join the Jung’s for dinner or not. The sunlight was blinding your eye, so you got up to shut the blinds. Just as you were about to do so, you saw a figure through the other window.

You expected to see the older male on the other side, but you actually saw Hoseok. Not that you had in issue with that. You thought of waving at Hoseok, but that would be creepy because it would look like you were watching him this whole time. Technically, you’re doing that right now. Just as you were about to shut the blinds, you swore you only blinked for a second and his shirt disappeared from his body.

Oh my- fuck.

Your mouth hung open at the sight. The man got a body. He’s so toned that you could just cry. It was pretty clear that God was biased and Hoseok was his favorite, so he gave him the good shit. You weren’t complaining though because you’re satisfied with being his friend.

But do you truly just want to be friends?

The sound of your phone vibrating snapped you out of your thoughts. You picked up the device to check who it was, but it was an unknown number. That piqued your curiosity. Unlocking your phone, you immediately hit the text app and opened the message.

(1) New message

Sunshine

Hello

You

Did you put yourself as Sunshine?

Sunshine

Yes…

But will you be joining us for dinner?

You

Will the moon and planets be there??

Sunshine

They’re busy

You’re invited to eat with the Jung family

(:

You

I accept, Sunshine

Sunshine

:D

You squealed when he sent that smiley face. That’s so fucking cute. Hoseok’s bright smile was the only thing you could imagine now. You realized you didn’t even ask your mom, but you knew she’d understand. When it came to good looking men, she’s the best wing women out there. In reality, she was sick and tired of your single ass life. What a supportive woman.

Without thought, you grabbed the nearest shirt and changed out of your current one. No one cares about the bottoms, so you just kept on the same shorts that you wore to school earlier. You left the room to inform your mom about your plans. Closing the blinds completely slipped your mind.

You’ve been standing in front of the door for a solid ten minutes now. You didn’t really understand why you became nervous all of a sudden. Literally, a couple of days ago you were fine and comfortable with the family, yet here you are at their doorstep, refusing to push the doorbell. The parents were friendly. The atmosphere was great. They were great. You’re just overthinking. It couldn’t be Hoseok making you feel this way because you’ve only known him for a while. It’s not like you saw him shirtless or anything.

You counted to five and forced yourself to push the button. The sound of the bell echoed through your ears. You waited a couple of seconds and the door flew open, revealing a disheveled Hoseok. Since when did messy hair and heavy breathing look so good on a man?

“Hello, please come in.”

You thanked him and let yourself in. The house was more organized and lively compared to scattered boxes and unbuilt furniture. He led you to the dining room and you saw his parents together in the kitchen chatting.

“Finally! It’s so nice to see you again,” Mrs. Jung beamed.

“Hope you’ve been well,” Mr. Jung nodded.

“Thank you for inviting me,” you smiled.

The four of you gathered in the dining room and sat. Each of them talked about their day. You were fond of the close bond the family shared. Not saying you don’t share that with your family, but it’s nice to see families go through the same thing.

“What do you think of Hoseok, Y/N?” his mother asked.

You nearly choked on your food and ended up having a coughing fit. That question nearly killed you.

“O-Oh, uh, your son is great,” you finally spoke. “Quite the gentleman.”

“Mom, what the he-”

“Barbara’s daughter is single,” she interrupted. “You can thank me later.”

You felt your stomach churn. You could even say that you felt sick.

“I think you two would be a cute couple,” she finished. “Y/N is too good for you anyways.”

This time you nearly fell off your chair. You appreciate the compliment, but never in your life did you think she would ever say that. If anything, you thought Hoseok was too good for you.

“I wouldn’t say that,” you spoke.

“Oh stop, it true. It’s rare to find a girl who helps a family moving in.”

“Well―”

“And you showed Hoseok around the school,” Junsu mentioned.

Wait. If they knew about that, then that means Hoseok talks about you to his parents. You felt some pride swell up in your chest, but he was probably just being nice. Remember, you totally don’t have a crush on your neighbor. Man, your life is a literal movie.

“I think your son is great in his own ways.”

Now all eyes were on you. You felt your face heat up, but you just had to get that off your chest. It wasn’t a lie, you really did think he’s an amazing guy, despite only knowing him for a short period. Thankfully, you weren’t the only one who was red. Hoseok was a tomato.

“You guys shou―”

“And I think Y/N wants to go home! Isn’t that right?” Hoseok explained as he jumped from his seat.

“Y-Yeah, it’s getting late,” you said as you got up from your seat.

You quickly placed your dirty dish into the sink and hugged his parents goodbye before rushing out of the dining room. What the fuck is going on? What the hell just happened?

Once the two of you were alone by the front door, you let out a nervous laugh.

“I’m so sorry about that,” he apologized.

“It’s not a problem. Honestly, my mom is always trying to set me up too.”

“I wouldn’t mind if it was you,” he mumbled.

You didn’t quite catch that, but he’s been through enough for the day. He opened the door for you and you both stepped outside. The stars were out and the moon was a lot brighter today. You were so immersed with the sight. He looked over at you and saw the eyes reflect in your eyes.

Snap.

Ever since your dinner with The Jung’s, you became a lot closer to Hoseok. He would walk with you to and from school, joined you for lunch with your best friend and Yoongi, and he would even come in for dinner. To say that your mom loved him was an understatement. When he wasn’t around, she would call him son-in-law.

You learned many things about the male. He’s a talented artist in many places. Photography, dance, drawing, and more. You were envious of his talent. The little things he did for you would bring a smile to your face. He would send you a good morning text or give you a hug whenever you two depart ways.

Remember how you said you wouldn’t catch feelings?

Too fucking late.

You were in too deep and it was starting to put you in an emotional rollercoaster. Having crushes are fun, but tiring. You have something to look forward to, but when they don’t do something you expect, you can’t help but feel a little sad. Although your friendship with Hoseok was blooming, so was his popularity.

Ever since he won his first dance competition―which he gave you backstage passes―his name spread like wildfire. Nearly every single person knew the name Jung Hoseok. You had to fight off a lot of girls just to be able to meet with him after your classes.

There was a day where you felt sad because you were thinking about Hoseok leaving you for new people. He noticed your saddened mood, so he pulled you off to the side and looked you in the eyes.

No matter who I’m with or where I am, you’ll always be the first person I think of

Ever since he said those words to you, he couldn’t stay off your mind. At this point, it was driving you crazy. Your heart was hurting for Hoseok and you chose to suffer through it.

“Dude, you look lovesick,” F/N blurted out.

You were literally just minding your own business.

“Thanks.”

“I’m gonna call Hos-”

“Don’t you dare,” you threatened; which earned a sigh from your best friend.

“You look miserable,” Yoongi spoke.

The two of you didn’t notice him coming until he sat down next to F/N and said those words. She squealed in excitement and clung onto his arms while resting her head on his shoulder.

“Yeah, not helping, fucking love birds,” you muttered.

“Then do something about it instead of moping around.”

You were about to fight Yoongi, but someone sat next to you; which startled you a bit.

“Do something about what?” Hoseok questioned.

“N-Nothing,” you breathed. “Ah look at the time! Gotta go!”

You got up from your seat and left the area. You couldn’t be around Hoseok because your feelings were becoming unbearable. Just being near him was torture. You wish you could kiss his soft lips and be encased by his strong arms, but sadly, this is reality and you needed to get out of your fantasy land.  

(1) New message

Sunshine

Did you go home without me??

):

You

I wasn’t feeling well, sorry.

Sunshine

Feel better (:

You

Thanks.

It was only four o’clock and you didn’t know what to do. Usually, you were still with Hoseok around this time and it felt odd that you were home early. Even your mom questioned why you were back already, but you only grunted in response before shutting the door of your room. You decided to stare at the ceiling until you drifted off into sleep.

You woke up. You look out your window and saw how dark it was outside. Sadly, you didn’t have any notifications on your phone, specifically none from Hoseok, but you didn’t blame him. You did respond to him monotonously and straight out sounded uninterested. You’d be lying if you said you didn’t want him to text you.

Despite taking a nap, you still felt tired. Maybe it was your emotions weighing you down. Honestly, you didn’t really have the motivation for anything; which sucked ass. You couldn’t help but feel like Hoseok deserved an explanation for your recent actions. Could you even bring yourself to send him a text?

Frustrated, you got up from your comfy bed and went into the kitchen to drink some water. You couldn’t help but wonder what Hoseok was up to right now.

Now's not the time to think about him, Y/N.

You let out a sigh and wished that your feelings would fade. You could literally have a normal and happy friendship with him, but your heart says otherwise. Self-blame won’t get you anywhere though. Maybe if you just outright tell him, you could get over this stupid phase. You prepared yourself for the worse.

So, here you are, sitting on your bed at nine 9:34 PM, conjuring up ideas of how to approach the situation.

(1) New message

You

Hey, look out your window real quick

Sunshine

?

Your heart was beating uncontrollably as you held up the sign that said: I like you a lot. You hid your face behind the white cardboard, desperately trying to hide your embarrassment. A bunch of scenarios played through your head, but you only focused on a specific one: rejection. At one point you felt like you couldn’t breathe because all these emotions were overwhelming, but it is what it is. On the bright side, you got something off your chest. It won’t be eating you up as bad anymore.

You looked passed your board to see if he was still looking at you, but he wasn’t standing by his window anymore. You placed the board on your desk and jogged back to your window. To get a better glimpse, you pulled up the blinds and slid your window open. You poked your head out. Much to your disappointment, he wasn’t there at all. In fact, it made you a little angry. It felt like he ignored you.

You were about to shut your window until something grabbed your hand. Fight mode kicked in real fast, so you readied your fist.

“W-wait!” the person panicked. “I-it’s me, Hoseok!”

You lowered your fist down but yanked your hand away from his. You couldn’t risk falling any deeper than you are right now. Hoseok saddened a little at your action, but he wanted to get straight to the point.

“If you’re here to reject me, I would’ve been fine with a text,” you mumbled. “I appreciate that you came all this way to-”

“That’s not why I’m here,” he interrupted. “C-Can I come in?”

You looked at him with conflict. Is he trying to rub salt on the wound? You moved aside to let him climb through your window. Your arms were crossed above your chest because you were on guard. You refuse to let your heart take any more hits. He stood by your window, fiddling with his fingers as if he was struggling to find the right words. Silence filled the room.

“Well?” You asked, breaking the tension.

He looked at you straight in the eye and stood up straight.

“W-Well, I don’t really know how to say this…”

“As I said if it’s re-”

“No! P-Please, give me a moment.”

You saw how desperate he seemed, so you walked over to your bed and patted the space next to you. You felt bad for being cold, so you want to try to help him feel as comfortable as possible. He hesitated but ended up plopping beside you with his whole body facing you. You waited until he was ready. Sometimes you forget that confessions can be troubling for both parties.

“When I first met you, you offered to help my family,” he spoke up. “You didn’t know who we were, yet you still offered.”

Honestly, you didn’t know where he was trying to go with this, but you didn’t interrupt him. You listened intently.

“To be honest, I was shocked by your kindness. You also helped me at school, let me join your friend group, and kept me company whenever we went home.”

“Oh, well, I guess I’m just a nice person.”

“No, you’re more than that,” he butted in. “You think about others without a second thought. At one point, I admired you.”

Now you were blushing. Your mouth was agape because you didn’t think he viewed you in the light. Either way, you didn’t want hopes to shoot through the roof, so you kept your expectations low.

“And well…” he paused; which left you on edge. “The admiration turned into something more.”

“Damn, I knew it,” you sighed.

“Y-You do?”

“Yeah, you want to be best friends. Is this what it’s like to be friend-zoned?”

“No!”

He was getting frustrated and you were flat out confused. You thought you pieced

everything together. Okay, no more jumping to conclusions. You kept your mouth shut and waited for him to formulate his words.

“I admire you,” he continued. “You make me want to be a better person for you.”

Thump.

“I-I wanted to be there for you and when you were sad that one time, you said you were scared I would leave you, something broke inside of me. I wanted to protect you.”

Thump.

“This whole time, I thought was fine with just being your friend, but I was wrong. I’m really selfish.”

Thump. Thump.

“Eventually, I found myself wanting more. I don’t want to be your friend.”

“Wha-”

“I’m in love with you, Y/N.”

“No fucking way, you lyin’,” you were in complete disbelief.

This all sounds too good to be true.

“I’m being serious,” he said sternly.

You didn’t know how to respond. You prepared yourself for rejection, but instead, you get the complete opposite. He never broke eye contact with you, but you could see that he was getting nervous again. You weren’t responding and he began to worry.

“I know you feel the same way, Y/N,” he whispered, smiling.

Now you’re getting flustered. You can’t run away in your own house. Hoseok felt confident. You both shared the same feelings and nothing can stop you two now. Nothing could go wrong at this point.

“Yeah, so?” you huffed. “You want a kiss as a reward or something?”

“Yeah, actually,” he smirked.

Curse you and your fucking mouth. Putting you in places that you don’t want to be in. Well, you don’t mind kissing him though. It’s not like you’ve always wanted to anyways. He turned his body towards you, so you scooted closer to him and made eye contact with him before looking down at his lips. Since when were they so…pink?

“I’m waiting.”

You rolled your eyes at his comment, but it helped get rid of some of that nervous feeling that welled up in your stomach. Thankfully, his eyes were closed. It would’ve been so awkward if they were staring right at you. He was bouncing in his spot because you could feel the bed shake a bit. You didn’t want to keep the male waiting, so you inched closer and closer. His looks were a bit intimidating up close.

“You can’t back out now,” you warned.

“I wasn’t planning to,” he answered back.

Here goes nothing.

You cupped his face and stared right at his lips. You found it cute that he leaned into your hand a little. He wanted to cherish you as much as you wanted to cherish him. Despite all the stalling you’ve been doing, he was enjoying every single second. All that mattered to him was that you’re there. This isn’t a dream, but it’s reality.

Bringing your face closer to his, you felt his breath hit your lips. He could feel your presence close to his own; which caused his heart rate to increase dramatically. If only you knew how much you meant to him and how badly he’s always wanted for this moment to happen. You both drove each other crazy.

The softness of his lips touched your own. At first, you held your breath in for a second, but you manage to relax into it. What you thought would be a simple peck, turned into open-mouth kisses. As the kisses became more intense, you moved your hands from his face to the back of his neck. He wanted you to be as close as possible, so he placed his hands on your waist and pulled you closer. The kisses you two shared proved how desperately both of you wanted this by the way you held each other.

Just as the two of you were about to pull away from each other, he bit the bottom of your lip and sucked it lightly. He looked at you with lust in his eyes. It was almost scary. But in a sexy way. You could almost feel how much he wanted you, but you wanted to settle down everything between the two of you.

“So…” you trailed off. “What are we now then?”

“Let me ask you out properly before we become official.”

“It doesn’t have to be special.”

“I want it to memorable.”

You felt the heat rise up in your cheeks. Hoseok was determined to make you feel special and he was willing to do as much as he can to prove how much you mean to him. No one has ever bothered to put that much effort into you, let alone being unofficial. Your body moved on its own, and you found yourself embracing him in your arms.  

The weather was sunny, you felt great, and everything was real. Yesterday wasn’t a dream and you realized that the moment you pinched yourself after waking up. Hoseok also sent you a good morning text with hearts surrounding the message. For once, you were having a good morning. The smell of breakfast made your day even better considering how you napped through dinner last night. The table was laid with piles of food and your mouth was watering.

“What’s with the smile on your face?” Your mom asked. “It’s unusual.”

“Don’t wof-ry abou- et,” you struggled to say with waffles stuffed in your mouth.  

“It has to do with Hoseok, huh?” she was eyeing you now.

“Look at the time! Gotta get to class, bye!”

Never have you ran so fast out of your house. The news between you and Hoseok needed to wait because technically, you two aren’t official. Yet. The thought about you two being together, gave you butterflies in your stomach. Right as you locked the front door of your house, Hoseok was already standing in front of your house with coffee in both his hands. He was smiling right at you and you felt the world get brighter.

“Good morning, Y/N,” he beamed. “I got you a little gift.”

“O-Oh! Thank you,” you smiled as you happily took the beverage from his hand.

Walking to school was enjoyable with Hoseok holding your hand and coffee in the other hand. As soon as you got to school, people kept staring, but you were unbothered because all that mattered was that you had him. He was smiling through the stares, but his eyes were mostly on you.

He walked you to your first class and his lips touched your cheek. You waved to him as he headed to his own class. As you sat in your seat, you were ambushed by your best friend once again.

“Bitch! I saw that!” she exclaimed while pointing her index finger at you. She didn’t even bother to sit at her desk. Instead, she stood right in front of you, waiting for an explanation.

“Saw what?”

“Ah! Don’t play dumb,” she countered. “Give me the deets.”

As much as you love your best friend, she can be loud at times because now a majority of the class was looking at you two. You gestured her to lean in closer, so she did. Instead of telling her, you grabbed her ear and told her that you’ll tell her after class. Once you let go, she eyed you while taking her seat next to you. You noticed how her leg was shaking; which you knew meant she was excited.

“So you’re telling me that you pulled a Taylor Swift and it worked?” F/N asked bewilderedly.

You laughed at your best friend's reaction.

“That’s all I gotta say.”

“Honestly, say no more,” she nodded approvingly.  

Dinner was amazing and you still couldn’t believe that Hoseok set it up all by himself, despite your mom wanting to help. The smile on your face wouldn’t go away. You wish you could live this moment forever, but you were grateful that you got to experience it. Hoseok felt accomplished the moment your eyes lit up. He knew that he wanted to make you happy from this moment on.

He led you to your room, ready to watch something on youtube. He already brought extra clothes for himself to get comfortable in. Without a warning, he took off his shirt and you could see the defined lines of his abs. You didn’t realize you were staring until he waved his hand in front of you. Embarrassed, you grabbed a t-shirt, some pajama shorts, and ran to the bathroom without making any eye contact with him. The last thing you heard was him chuckling.

After regaining your posture and successfully changing into comfy clothes, you managed to exit the bathroom with ease. Hoseok was already settled in your bed with his back against the bed frame with his attention on his phone. Who could have known a guy could look so good in a plain white tee and sweats. You hopped on your bed and snuggled into your blankets before taking your laptop and putting on some music. You tried to stay cool despite there being a hot man next to you on your bed. It was pretty exciting.

“I wanna show you a video,” Hoseok spoke up.

You looked up from your phone and leaned closer to him. Instead of playing the video, he wrapped his arm around your shoulders and pulled your closer. The heat traveled up to your cheeks and you looked up at him.

“Sorry, it was the only way I could pull you closer to me,” he smiled.

Well fuck.

As he unlocked his phone, you noticed his wallpaper. The person on his phone looked familiar and he saw you staring at his screen.

“When did you take this?” You asked.

“Remembered the first time you came over for dinner? You were looking at the stars and I couldn’t help myself. I had to capture the moment where heaven couldn’t match your beauty.”

He finally played a video of an idol group dancing, but your thoughts were racing through your head. You tried to calm your heart by taking a deep breath; instead, you got a whiff of his cologne. Oh, boy did that shit smell amazing. Without realizing it, your face was practically buried in his chest.

“It’s Kalvin Clein,” he spoke up as he soothingly rubbed your back.

“You can’t call me out like that,” you mumbled.

“As your boyfriend, yeah I can,” he chuckled.

There were butterflies in your stomach. He can’t just say that term so casually. Your heart and soul wasn’t ready for that. You ended up snuggling closer to him and placing your legs on top of his. Now you could see the screen of his phone more clearly, but this time, someone else was having trouble focusing on the video. His body stiffened, but you paid no attention to the subtle action. Hoseok never showed any interest in certain things. Especially the explicit ones. Then again, you both never tried anything.

We’ve never even had sex.

“W-We can if you want.”

“Did I say that out―oh my god,” you wheezed.

You’re totally not embarrassed at all. Blame your hormones. Speaking your mind has been putting you in deep shit.

“I-I mean we can, but I understand if you do-”

“I do, I really do…” he paused. “I was just going at your pace.”

This man is so fucking considerate that it hurts your soul, but that’s not the only thing that’s hurting. Your need for him is more painful.

“That’s hot.”

“What?”

“What?”

“Fuck it.”

You grabbed his phone out of his hand and gently put it on the nightstand. As much as you love being in his arms, you sat up and straddled him. Honestly, you had nothing to lose at this point. You two were officially already and it’s too late to back out now.

He looked at you with wide eyes, still comprehending what just happened. You didn’t wait for him to make a move, so you began to grind down on his cock. His eyes rolled back as he hissed through his teeth. You felt his hands wrap around your hips eagerly, encouraging you to slowly pace yourself back and forth. They gripped tighter as you continued to rub your womanhood onto his member. You could tell that he was holding back his moans in the back of his throat by the way his breathing was unsteady.

“Let me hear you,” Y/N whispered.

You dipped your face into the crane of his neck and kissed him sweetly.

Hoseok looked at the way you rode him, causing his head to throw back with excitement. Finally, he let himself go and let out his stifled moans.

“Keep going,” he sighed, eyes still closed from the undeniable pleasure.

With his size growing in his gray sweatpants, your center became damper alongside him. You two were in sync as the sounds escaped both of your mouths; which then led your hands to trail down his torso, taking the hem of his white t-shirt and tugging it up. Instinctively, Hoseok took your sign and took off his top to toss it onto the floor. You let out a hum of amusement. Before, you had only gotten a chance to see it, but now you had your hands roaming all over his toned body.

“Your turn,” he spoke, mimicking your last action.

You smirked, eyeing the way his fingers fiddled with the bottom of your shirt. But just as you were about to take initiative, he began peeling your own piece of clothing and tossed to the floor as well. You could hear him swearing to himself. Letting out a soft moan, you took your index finger to drag his eyes to yours. He showcased a lovely; yet, lazy smile. With his hair nearly covering his eyes though, you pouted. You wanted to see his gaze meet yours, and that’s exactly what you did. Your fingers pushed his long bangs back, only urging you to kiss him once again.

“You’re so beautiful,” Hoseok murmured against your lips.

All you could do was smile in return. You were flattered above anyone else at that moment. Your riding had increased, but his strong hands stopped you for a few seconds. He didn’t have to say much as that point, but you couldn’t help but let out a small laugh. Knowing he heard you, he also chuckled. All you could think was, goddamn.

It only took a second for Hoseok to flip both of you over. Now that he was on top, he placed a chaste kiss on your lips, then trailing a handful of wet kisses down your neck, between your breasts, and stopping just above the waistband of your shorts. Your moans were constant; even though you had some moments when you wanted to stop yourself from becoming so vulnerable. His doe-like eyes peered up at you, catching each other’s attention while his lips were still pressed against your sensitive skin.

You could feel the corners of his lips lifting up with a smile. He was satisfied with his doing, and you wanted to let him know he was doing everything right. When you felt the beds of his fingertips curling around the elastic, you threw your head back in preparation for what was about to come. When you could feel the cold air of the room hitting the rest of your bare body, you inhaled sharply. Your feet gradually slide up towards yourself naturally, knowing you had to brace yourself. As soon as Hoseok’s hot breath hit your wet center, you felt the shivers running throughout your entire body. His warm hands wrapped themselves around your thighs.

“Please,” you whined, squirming under his control.

“So eager for my tongue baby girl,” he mumbled.

Just as you were about to respond back, you could feel the wetness of his own mouth touch your clit, causing your head to dig back into the pillow. You swore under your breath and bucked your hips towards him. Trying not to lose yourself, your hand reached down for his and gripped it tightly. As his tongue ran up and down between your folds, your toes began to curl. The wears were unstoppable and clearly neither way he. Even when you can't stop your own hips from moving his mouth didn’t pull away at any second. You could feel the intense bubble in your stomach almost bursting.

“Hoseok,” you moaned.

There was nothing like the way you said the name that turned him on even more. Just as he thought he was going to spare you, he took away one of his hands. You gulped. When you felt his two digits pushing into your tight pussy, you bit the bottom of your lips as hard as you could in order not to make any loud noises. As much as you wanted to scream at the top of your lungs with the amount of pleasure he provided you, there were still boundaries. You had to keep in mind that you were still in your room and a house that was shared with more than one person. But when Hoseok started pumping his fingers in and out of you, he was making it too difficult for you. By the way, you seemed to struggle beneath him, he moaned against your clit. The vibrations sent chills down your spine from the additional euphoric feeling.

“I’m so close,” Y/N whispered with desperation. “Keep going.”

Of course, Hoseok would follow your orders. If he had this reaction out of you, he didn’t want it to stop. It was a reward to already have you to call his very own, but having you finish due to his ability would be a great addition. Just then, he thought to push his index and middle finger deeper inside of you, curling the tips of them every time he entered you. Now that the butterflies were set free in your stomach, your hands reached for the top of his head, not wanting this moment to end.

“I-I’m c-coming,” you stuttered, feeling your pussy clenching around his fingers.

After your release of sweet pleasure, you were panting heavily. You felt like you ran a whole marathon. His fingers and tongue felt amazing, yet you felt incomplete. You wanted his cock badly. No, scratch that, you needed his cock. He did so much for you and you wanted to repay him. It took you a lot of effort to sit up. You motioned him to lie down on his back and he followed your order.

Once he settled on his back, you didn’t hesitate to smash your lips together. Your tongues battled for dominance, but you wanted to get straight to pleasuring your man. As much as you love his mouth on yours, you pulled away and grabbed his wrist. His fingers were still coated with your juices, but you didn’t care. Without thought, you brought your mouth to his fingers. You began running your tongue in between the two digits while eyeing him seductively. Eventually, you sucked on his fingers and rolled your eyes back to give him a little show.

“Holy shit,” he breathed.

You smiled at his comment and gave him a quick peck before lowering your head towards his aching bulge. Your hands rubbed his clothed cock and you could hear his breath hitch. Then you traced your fingers around the waistband of both his sweatpants and boxers, quickly pulling them down. His dick sprung up, hitting his stomach. You wrapped your hand his thickness and slowly pumped his girth. He let out a moan as you began to pick up the pace. You finally brought your lips to the tip of his cock. You guided your tongue around him, allowing you to coat his member. Finally, you took his entire size into your mouth and his hands immediately tugged on your locks.

You bobbed your head back and forth at a steady pace. Looking up, you saw him biting down on his lower lip. You wanted to hear him. You wanted him to say your name. Without warning, you brought his cock to the back of your throat.

“Fuck, Y/N.”

Just hearing him say that encouraged you to go faster. You grabbed his hips to steady your pace. Suddenly, you felt a harsh tug on your hair, causing you to pull away from him. You looked at him with confusion.

“Keep that up and I would’ve came in your mouth…” he paused. “But I want to come inside you.”

You felt your pussy moisten at his words. This man was driving you crazy.

“I’m on birth control.”

“That’s all I needed to hear,” he smirked.

He grabbed your arm and pulled you down on your back. Before you knew it, he was back on top of you. Refusing you to do any more work.

“You did enough for me, baby,” he spoke as he sucked on your neck.

His easily slipped a finger inside you, causing you to mewl.

“And you’re already so fucking wet for me.”

He pulled his finger out and positioned himself in between your legs. The tip of his cock was right at your entrance, but he wanted to tease you a bit. You watched as he grabbed his hard length and slowly rubbed it against your folds. You could hear the wetness of your pussy as he would insert the tip and take it out. It was fucking torture.

“Hoseok, baby, please.”

“Please what?”

“Your cock, i-inside me…” you stuttered, “Please!”

You begging for him was music to his ears. He hummed in satisfaction. Finally, he inserted his whole member inside you and it was pure bliss. He placed one of your legs on his shoulder, allowing him to go deeper, causing you to cover your mouth to muffle your screams. He brought his fingers to your clit and rubbed it in a circular motion. You arched your back, taking in all the pleasure he’s giving you. Another bubble was forming at the pit of your stomach and you didn’t know how much longer you could take it. Hoseok could tell you were on the verge of coming, so he picked up the pace. He was going harder while rubbing your clit at the same time as you were closing in on another orgasm. He felt you clench around him, but that didn’t slow down his rhythm.

“Oh fuck!”

You finally reached your limit and came all over his still hardened cock.

“Hands and knees. Now,” he demanded.

He wasn’t going to let you recover. He positioned himself perfectly at your entrance and slammed himself in you, nearly knocking you off your hands. His balls kept hitting your pussy and you knew he wasn’t holding back. As he continued to thrust himself in you, you felt a hard smack on your ass. You moaned at his gesture, earning a hard pull on your hair. Your neck was bending back as he brought his lips to your ear. His teeth were softly gnawing on the shell of your ear. You were enjoying this too much, clearly, he was too.

“Right there, oh shit,” you moaned.

He placed his hands on your hips and pulled you into him. His pace fastened while your moans filled the room. At this point, you knew that both of you could be heard, but you had no fucks left to give. The only thing you could focus on was how close you two were and the immense amounts of pleasure you’ve both given and received. You could tell that you were getting weaker when your head began to slowly fall into the pillow, but Hoseok wasn’t going to have that. Seeing the way he had you, it was the perfect time to give you no choice. When he had one hand secure on your hip, the other reach around to cup your throat. He had no idea how much you enjoyed the retrain, but when he took a quick glance at your eyes, he knew. Your eyes rolled back, hair messy and mouth open wide, he had you locked. Just how he inched you back, your back was nearly touching his torso. Your posture was in that exact position where you could feel every inch of him inside of you. Again, you could feel yourself coming undone once more. He was just too immersed in his actions that his pace was steady and focused. The slapping of his hips against your ass, both of your heavy breaths intertwining with one another, and the sweat dripping down both of your bodies had a great effect on the great event.

“Fuck- I’m gonna-” he uttered.

“Come inside of me babe,” she interrupted.

His breathing suddenly became unsteady and his thrusts also started to feel messy and slow. With every last pumped inside of you, he paused for a second. With one last hard push, he let out a grunt and satisfied sigh.

“Fuck,” he sighed in relief.

As the two of you collected yourselves, your bodies plopped on the bed beside each other. Even though your breaths were still loud and heavy, you both managed to shoot each other a smile. You helped each other clean up and got ready for bed. You both exchanged a couple of words to each other before drifting off into a deep slumber.

You woke up to a peaceful sleeping Hoseok. His breath was steady with one arm was slung over your waist. In the end, you ended up being with the boy next door. You felt him move a bit before he finally opened his eyes. He looked at you and warmly grinned.

“Hey there, neighbor.”

[imaginesforyourfandom]

Heal My Heart - Chapter 5

Christen POV - December 2008

I sighed to myself for what felt like the millionth time as I stared at the Torres house. I knew I needed to go towards it and talk to (Y/N), but there was a part of me that was terrified. I’ve always felt at home and relaxed with (Y/N), but ever since we went to college it feels like there is this never-ending wall between us.

“Christen?” I jumped slightly turning to see (Y/N)’s mom, aunt and grandma getting out of the car.

“Hi!” I said cheerfully making my way towards them. I smiled when Maria opened her arms for a hug.

“Oh sweetheart, how are you?” Rosa, (Y/N)’s grandma, asked me.

“I’m well. I just got back from school not too long ago. I thought I would drop by and see everyone.”

“That’s so sweet. Come on.” Maria said, guiding me towards the house.

Gina, (Y/N)’s aunt, walked into the house first with the two of us following behind. I heard a loud squeal before turning the corner and seeing (Y/N) on the ground blushing while staring at her Aunt.

“(Y/N)!” Gina scolded as the girl in question immediately started shaking her head. “In your mothers’ home?”

“No!” she defended as she stood ready to defend herself. “We were just…”

“Just what?”

“Cuddling?” she stated though it sounded like a question.

“I hope god does not strike you where you stand.” Rosa said walking passed us giving her granddaughter a look. “It’s good to see you Alex.”

“You too ma’am.” Alex said with a bright red face.

“At least have the courtesy to do that in your own room…” her mom said, walking towards her as she looked down.

“Yes Mami…” she said before her mom gave her a kiss on the cheek.

“Will you be staying for dinner Alex?”

“If that’s alright…” the girl said as Maria smiled warmly before walking towards the kitchen.

As soon as all the adults were out of sight, Alex reached out swatting (Y/N) on the arm. The defender grinned down at the girl before turning her eyes to me. I tried not to feel discouraged when her smile seemed to falter a little.

“Hey Chris…” she said walking towards me pulling me in for a hug.

“Hey…” I said before letting her go. I turned towards her girlfriend giving a small smile. “Hi Alex. It’s good to see you again.”

“Yeah! You too…” she said standing up and fixing her clothes. “I’m gonna kill you next time.”

“No, you love me too much…” (Y/N) said, giving her a cheeky smile.

“Unfortunately.” she said giving (Y/N) a kiss before exiting the room heading in the direction of the bathroom.

“You guys are really cute together.” I commented as (Y/N) smiled with a slight blush tinting her cheeks.

“Thanks.” She said looking in the direction that Alex had gone in. “So, what’s up? I didn’t know you’d be dropping by.”

“I was in the neighborhood. I thought I would come see you. We haven’t really seen each other in a while.” A small look of guilt seemed to spread over her face as she nodded her head.

“You’re right. Why don’t you stay for dinner?” she asked as I smiled warmly. I turned my head when Alex came back from the bathroom. She looked between us two before giving (Y/N) a small smile.

“I’m gonna see if your mom needs any help in the kitchen.” She said as (Y/N) nodded her head.

“Thank you, baby.” She responded before turning back towards me. 

“I don’t want to intrude on your guys' night.”

“You’re not. I promise it’s fine. Plus, you can get to know Alex a little better.” She seemed excited which is why I found it so difficult to say no.

“Okay, sure I’ll stay.” I said as she grinned before we headed to the kitchen. (Y/N) immediately moved towards her girlfriend who gave her a warm smile. I turned my attention towards her family as they all shot me small knowing looks.

“Is there anything I can do to help?” I asked as her mom shook her head.

“You can help me set the table.” Rosa said as I turned to go help her put spots down for everyone.

We sat down for dinner not long after. It seemed to go off without any troubles as we all tried to catch up. Once dinner was done, I helped clear the table before deciding to take my leave. (Y/N)’s mom offered me dessert, but I politely declined. I barely got to say goodbye to (Y/N) as her attention seemed to be taken up by Alex. I wonder if this is how (Y/N) felt when I was with Kelley. If so, then I owe her a serious apology.

Alex POV Switch

“I am mortified.” I mumbled as (Y/N) laughed. We were standing outside of her house as I was getting ready to leave.

“Why?”

“Your whole family like caught us making out…” I said as she tried to hold back her laughter.

“Oh, it’s not that bad…” she defended as I glared at her.

“It is.” I said as she smiled softly.

“It’s not. If anything, I think they are super happy knowing how happy I am with you.”

“Don’t be sweet. I am mad at you.” I groaned as she leaned forward to give me a small kiss. “Christen seems nice.”

“She is. She’s been my best friend for years.” She responded as I nodded my head.

“I’m surprised you guys didn’t go to the same school.”

“Yeah, Berkley gave me a better scholarship. I’m not trying to finish school in debt.” She joked as I chuckled.

“That’s fair.”

“I’m really glad you came tonight.”

“You say that like I haven’t been at your house like every day.” She shrugged her shoulders a little before staring at me.

“What can I say other than I love you.” She said softly as I gave her another kiss.

“I love you too.” I mumbled against her lips. “I need to go home though.”

She pouted at me, but reluctantly let me leave. Things have been incredible since we decided to be in a relationship. I have never felt safer than when I am with her. I look at her and I know that I am in good hands.

“Hey sweetie.” My mom said as I entered my house.

“Hi mom.” I said dropping onto the couch.

“How’s (Y/N)?” she asked, giving me a small smile. I blushed a little before smiling.

“She’s good.”

“You should invite her over for dinner one day.” She responded as I nodded my head. “It would be nice to see her again.”

“I’ll ask her.” I said before deciding to head to bed.

The next few weeks were spent with (Y/N). We started to train with each other which was nice considering we were opposing positions. I could feel my game getting better the more I practiced with her. I was over the moon when I got an invite to a New Years party that I was most definitely dragging (Y/N) to. We went last year, but this year we would get to go as a couple.

“How do I look?” I questioned looking to (Y/N) who grinned at me.

“Absolutely perfect.” She responded, biting her lip as I shook my head trying to hide my blush.

“Great! Let’s go…” I said dragging her out the door.

Once we arrived, it was a lot of walking around and talking to people. It was nice to get to spend time with (Y/N) and get to just be with her without any kind of distraction.

“This is nice…” she said as we slow danced together.

“It is, isn’t it…” I responded as she leaned in to give me a kiss. “I love you.”

“I love you too.”

I was pleased to find that there was a balcony that we could escape too. We went up there and I had a strong feeling of Déjà vu as we stood up there together talking.

“This year has been insane…” she said as I nodded my head.

“It’s been very kickass.” I responded remembering my toast I made at the beginning of the year.

“Kickass indeed.” She said as I looked at her.

“What’s been the best part of your year?”

“You mean besides you?” she questioned as I blushed before motioning for her to continue.  “Probably winning a gold medal.”

“Mine is winning the U-20 World Cup…” I said as she nodded her head.

“That was great too.”

“It’s not close to winning a gold medal.” I said as she rolled her eyes.

“Well, if I am being honest…you are the best thing that happened to me this year…”

“I’m better than a gold medal?”

“You’re the greatest thing I could’ve got this year Alex…” she said with a serious look as I smiled softly.

“Keep playing and I might just make you my new year’s kiss…” I said echoing a statement from a year ago as I heard people start counting down.

“I don’t really think I would mind if you were my new year’s kiss…” she responded before leaning in and kissing me. The sounds of people celebrating and the fireworks going off seemed to become faint as I let myself get lost in the feeling of bliss.

“I love you.” I said as she smiled softly at me.

“I love you too.”

We stayed on the balcony a little bit longer before leaving the party altogether. Much like the beginning of this year, (Y/N) stayed at my house but was banished to the couch by my parents. She didn’t seem to mind though as she went without any complaints. It really was a perfect start to the year.

The rest of the break went by at an extremely quick rate. I was a little bummed out when (Y/N) had to leave for the senior team camp. I mean…I am super proud, but I was bummed that we couldn’t spend the last few weeks of break together. The only saving grace was that I got to go back to school and be reunited with Katie, Blake, and some of my other friends.

“How was your break?” Katie asked as I sat with them in the coffee shop.

“It was amazing.” I admitted as they both smiled. “(Y/N) and I spent pretty much the whole thing together.”

“Y’all really attached to each other huh?” Blake asked as I nodded. “She told me you guys got caught by her family…”

“Oh my god.” I mumbled putting my face in my hands to hide my blush.

“No way! Really?” Katie asked with a giant smile as I pouted in embarrassment.

“I’m going to kill her.” I said as they both grinned.

“You got caught by her family? Like, what are we talking….full nude?”

“No! Oh my god!” I said feeling my face burn even more. “We were just making out when her family walked in.”

“That’s so embarrassing.” Blake said as I rolled my eyes.

“It was embarrassing. I couldn’t make eye contact with them after that…”

“I can’t imagine they held it against you…” Blake said, giving me a smile. “I mean her mom seems nice enough…”

“Her mom is a sweetheart.” I responded as they both nodded their heads. “They were really nice about it.”

“When does that jackass get back anyway?” Blake questioned as I shrugged.

“She should be back in another week or so…” I said as she nodded her head.

“Why? Do you miss her?” Katie asked as Blake nodded her head.

“I do…a little bit.” Blake said, giving a small shrug as I smiled. Blake and (Y/N) really are attached to each other.

The next couple days was getting back into my routine of working out and getting used to my classes. I talked on the phone every night with (Y/N), but it didn’t feel as satisfying as if she were actually here.

“Alex?” I turned when I saw Brie coming towards me. I was on a run when the other girl stopped me.

“Brie? Hey, how are you?” I asked as the girl gave me a hug. Brie was on the team with (Y/N) and I. We didn’t talk much mainly because she didn’t seem to like (Y/N) all that much.

“I’m great! How are you?”

“I am well. Just trying to get back in the routine of school.” She laughed giving me a nod.

“I totally get that.” She said as I nodded my head. “So, I heard you’re dating (Y/N)? How’s that going?”

“It’s going well!” I said, feeling a little suspicious of the girl’s question.

“That’s great!” she said as I smiled. “Though, I have to say…you’re so much more forgiving than I am.”

“What do you mean?” I responded with confusion evident on my face.

“I mean…if my friend let me chase someone they knew didn’t like me back, I don’t think I could forgive them...” I felt my heart drop a little at her statement.

“What are you talking about?”

“…and then to date them? Absolutely amazing. You are truly a saint.” She said, seemingly ignoring my question.

“What? Wait…stop! What do you mean?” I questioned as she paused giving me a confused look.

“(Y/N). She knew Tatiana didn’t feel the same way about you.” She said as I felt like I was going to be sick. “You didn’t know?”

“She what? Wait…how do you know that?”

“I heard her talking about it with Val and Torrey. She said she didn’t know how to tell you that she knew that Tati didn’t feel the same way about you. It happened last year.”

I stood there staring at her as she observed me for a moment. I tried to think of what to say to her, but all I could think about was the feeling of betrayal that was running through my chest.

“I’m so sorry Alex. I thought you knew.” Brie said as I shook my head.

“It’s fine. Thank you for telling me.” I said turning and walking away from her. I made my way back to my dorm room as I tried to gather my thoughts.

I looked up when Katie walked in with Blake. They both quieted down when they saw me. I must have seemed very sad as they stared at me with concerned looks.

“Hey what’s wrong?” Katie asked me as she came closer to me.

“Did you guys know that Tati didn’t feel the same way about me last year?” I questioned as Katie gave me a confused look. Blake looked away as I nodded my head.

“I found out from (Y/N).” she said as I shook my head.

“Of course…and how long did she know?” I asked as Blake shrugged her shoulders.

“I don’t know.”

“So, she just let me walk around like an idiot?” I asked to no one in particular. “God, I am so stupid.”

“Alex…” Katie said softly as I shook my head.

“Why didn’t she tell me? I embarrassed myself and she could’ve prevented it.” I argued as they both gave me sad looks.

“I think you should talk to her. If I know anything about her, she had her reasons.” Blake said as I shook my head.

“Well, obviously you are going to take her side. She’s your best friend.” I said as Blake sighed before turning to exit the room.

“(Y/N) isn’t a spiteful person. You know that. She loves you a lot.” She said, exiting before I could respond.

I didn’t say another word as I turned and curled up into bed. Katie tried to talk to me, but I just ignored her. I wasn’t interested in talking to anyone as I tried to think about how I was feeling. Blake is right in that (Y/N) would never intentionally try to hurt anyone.

The next day I went to my classes having really gotten no sleep. Usually, I would head to the coffee shop to get something to drink, but I was feeling too down to do that. I was walking towards my room when the door across the hall opened up. (Y/N) walked out and grinned at me, opening her arms with a giant smile on her face.

“Surprise!” she said as I stopped and stared at her. Her smile faltered a little bit when I didn’t return the smile. “What’s wrong?”

“You’re an ass. That’s what’s wrong.” I said walking towards my room and ignoring my girlfriend.

“What did I do?” she questioned following me into my room. I whipped around towards her, catching her slightly off guard as I pointed a finger at her angrily.

“You let me embarrass myself. You let me get my heart broken.”

“Alex, I have no idea what you’re talking about.” She defended as I glared at her

“So, you didn’t know that Tati didn’t feel the same way about me last year?” her face dropped as she adopted a guilty expression.

“Alex…” she said softly as I shook my head.

“No. Don’t. Whatever you’re going to say…I don’t want to hear it.”

“Please listen to me.” She said coming closer to me as I shook my head. “Let me explain.”

“Why didn’t you tell me?” I questioned deciding I wanted to know why.

“I didn’t know how to tell you and-”

“You encouraged me to go after her!” I exploded a little as she jumped slightly. “You knew and you still encouraged it.”

“No, I never would have done something like that. I found out after that conversation we had. I tried to figure out how to tell you, but it never seemed like the right time. I didn’t want to hurt you and I felt like maybe it would be better coming from Tati than from me. I wasn’t expecting Tati to just never tell you.”

“I trusted you.” I said, feeling tears coming to my eyes.

“I know.” She seemed hesitant to come near me before reaching out and resting her hand on my arm. “Alex, I am so sorry.”

“I need space.” I said abruptly, pulling away from her. She gave me a pleading look as I turned my back to her. “Please leave.”

“Okay.” She said with a sad tone. “I’ll go.”

“Thank you.” I responded, not turning back towards her.

“I love you.” She said as she opened the door. Her movements halted as she waited for me to respond.

“Yeah you too.” I mumbled as she sighed before closing the door.

The next couple days I avoided her at all costs. She had started working at the shop again, so I was avoiding it at all costs. Our fight had definitely divided our group as Blake stayed with (Y/N) and Katie stayed with me. I knew eventually I would need to speak to her, but I was having a hard time wrapping my head around the whole thing.

There was one day that I knew (Y/N) would be in class so I decided to grab some coffee for myself. I entered the shop and walked up to the counter. I grimaced a little when I saw Tati walk towards me. She gave me a small smile before asking for my order. I sat down and waited before the cup was placed down in front of me. I looked up when Tati sat across from me.

“Hey.” She said as I stared at her.

“Hi.” I mumbled earning an amused smile from the barista.

“I heard all about your big fight with (Y/N)” she said as I scowled at the older girl.

“I don’t want to talk about it.” I responded as she nodded her head.

“That’s too bad.” She gave me a giant smile. “I want to.”

“Tati…”

“Alex.” She gave me a look that immediately shut me up. “I know why you’re angry, but I think you are being a little harsh on her.”

“You don’t get to criticize me for this.” I responded as she nodded her head. “She let me make a fool of myself with you. So, did you…you both let me walk around looking like an idiot.”

“Do you know how many times (Y/N) yelled at me for what happened? How many times she scolded me for not telling you? She was so angry at me for what happened that she basically stopped being my friend for a few weeks.”

“You broke my heart Tati…” I said as she looked down with guilt

“I know and I am sorry for that, but (Y/N) mended it.” She said as I deflated at her statement. “(Y/N) stayed by your side through everything. She was going through something too you know…but she put her own problems aside to help you deal with yours. You guys saved each other.”

I sat there saying nothing before she stood up and made her way back towards the counter. I wasn’t sure how long I was sitting there processing her statement until (Y/N) came into the shop. I looked up at her as she gave me a panicked look. She seemed hesitant to come anywhere near me as I motioned for her to sit.

“Hey…” she said softly as I sat there staring at her. The nervousness was coming off her in waves as she waited for me to say something.

“Hi.”

“How are you?”

“I’m angry at you.” She pouted a little at my statement before nodding her head.

“I know.”

“You should have told me.” I said as she looked down for a moment.

“I wanted Tati to tell you. It felt like it would have been better if she had told you. I wasn’t expecting her to let it go on for so long, but you’re right I should have told you. I am so sorry Alex.”

“I love you (Y/N), but I need to know that you’re going to be honest with me even when it’s difficult.”

“I will be. Alex, I would never try to intentionally keep something from you.” She said as I stared at her.

“Do you promise?” she nodded her head as I sighed. I leaned forward a little bringing my hand down to intertwine our fingers. “I did miss you by the way.”

“I missed you too.” She said, giving me the softest smile.

“As adorable as this is, and I am happy for you guys making up…I need (Y/N) to get to work.” I turned and gave Tati a glare as the barista just grinned at me. (Y/N) stood up and leaned down to kiss my cheek. I caught her shirt before she could fully pull away and pulled her back in to give her a firm kiss on the lips.

“I love you.” I mumbled as she smiled.

“I love you too.” She pulled away and went to get to work. I looked down at my backpack and decided to do work while I waited for (Y/N) to be done with her shift.

The next couple weeks were really nice as we all fell back into our usual routines. Blake and Katie seemed overjoyed to know we were back on good terms with each other. (Y/N) was being extra sweet to me to make up for what had happened. I loved the attention she was giving me, but I tried to make sure she knew that I wasn’t going to hold it against her forever.

“What are you guys living plans for next year?” Katie asked as I looked up from doing my homework.

Katie, Blake and I were sitting in the coffee shop doing homework while (Y/N) was working. I glanced over at (Y/N) who was making a drink before looking back at Katie.

“I don’t know.” Blake said crinkling her nose at a question on her homework. “Probably live in the dorms.”

“Would anyone be interested in getting an apartment?” Katie questioned as I looked at her. Blake looked up with a thoughtful expression. “It’s just we all spend time with each other anyway and are constantly sleeping in each other’s rooms.”

“That’s mostly because Alex and (Y/N) don’t know how to stay away from each other for longer than a night.” Blake joked as I scowled at her.

“We do know. We just prefer not to.” She rolled her eyes as I turned to Katie. “I would live in an apartment. I think (Y/N) would too.”

“I was thinking we could get a three bedroom for all of us and it would be nice.” Katie said as I furrowed my brows at her.

“Why would we get a three-bedroom apartment?”

“Well, wouldn’t you and (Y/N) want to be in the same room?” I turned towards Blake before shaking my head.

“No, we would want our own space.” I said as they both gave me confused looks.

“You guys don’t like being away from each other at all…”

“We would want our own space.” I remained firm as they both shook their heads.

“I’m exhausted.” (Y/N) complained sitting next to me and dropping her head down on the table. I rubbed her back a little bit as she groaned.

“Hey, would you want to live in an apartment with us?” Katie asked as (Y/N) looked up and around the table.

“Like, all of you?” I chuckled at the confused expression that passed over her face.

“Yes, all of us you dick…” Blake said as I grinned.

“Why not?” she said shrugging her shoulders. I smiled leaning down and kissing her cheek.

“So, should we get a three bedroom or a four bedroom?” Katie asked while giving me a look that said, ‘shut up’

“Why would we get a three bedroom?” (Y/N) asked, leaning up and stretching her back.

“Well, don’t you and Alex want to sleep together?” Blake questioned as (Y/N) looked to me and then back at them.

“I mean…yeah, but we need our own space.” I nodded my head with a grin as Katie and Blake both shook their heads.

“I hate both of you.” Katie mumbled before (Y/N) stood up to get back to work.

Over the next few weeks, we collectively spent our time looking for places to live that were close to campus. It was mainly about finding a place that we could all afford that had everything we were looking for.

“Okay, but what about this place?” Katie asked, turning her computer screen. I turned to look at the outline of the place. 4 bedrooms, 2 bathrooms, a kitchen, laundry room, and a balcony.

“How much is it?” I questioned as she pulled up the screen.

“Well, according to this, we would all have to pay our own rents which would be about $550 each.”

“That’s not too bad.” I said as she nodded her head.

“I’ll print the information so that we can share it with dumb and dumber.” I let out a laugh before turning to scold the girl for the insults.

“That’s not funny. They are both so smart.”

“No, they are idiots together, but smart on their own.” She said, shaking her head as I bit my laugh to contain my smile. She grabbed the information off the printer before going across the hall to see what the other two thought.

A few minutes later, (Y/N) came into my room giving me a smile as she came closer to me. I happily accepted the kiss she gave me as she climbed into my bed and laid down while I was doing my homework.

“Shouldn’t you be doing homework?” I questioned as she let out a groan.

“Cuddling with you sounds like much more fun.”

“Not as productive though.” I stated earning a pout from her. “Did you see the information about the apartment?”

“I did. It looks great.” She commented, closing her eyes. I gently nudged her to get her to stay awake.

“I think so too.” I smiled as she nodded her head.

“Yeah, so did the other two. Katie is already on the phone with them to see about getting a tour.”

“When exactly are we supposed to go do that?” she shrugged her shoulders as I turned my attention back towards my homework. It wasn’t long before I heard the soft snores coming from my girlfriend. It gave me a chance to observe her as she laid there in a relaxed state. She really was the cutest.

We were in fact able to get a tour of the apartment which went amazingly. We had to see the apartment without (Y/N) due to her being in camp, but she said she trusted our opinions and my “impossibly high standards” whatever that means. We got to sign a lease that would have us staying there for at least the next year once (Y/N) returned. Though, we wouldn’t be allowed to move in until mid-July.

“Katie and I are going to take one half of the apartment and you and (Y/N) will have the other half because there is no way that I will let my room be next to either of yours.” Blake said as I stared at her with an amused smile.

“We aren’t that bad.” I stated as she gave me a wide-eyed look.

“You have no idea how bad you really are.” She said as I grinned at her. “I’m going to get a drink. Do you want anything?”

“Just some water.” I responded as I watched her approach the counter.

“What can I get you?” (Y/N) asked as Blake gave her a mischievous grin.

“Water for your girlfriend.” She said as (Y/N) nodded her head. “I will get a half caramel macchiato and half hazelnut latte.”

“What?” she gave Blake a confused look. “Like, in the same drink?”

“Yep!” The look on (Y/N)’s face was comical as the barista stared at her friend with a deep frown.

“Why don’t you just get a caramel macchiato with hazelnut syrup?”

“Nope. I told you what I want.” Blake responded as the defender’s frown deepened.

“That will be $4.35” she responded as Blake smiled at her. Blake came back and sat down as I shook my head at her.  

“That was mean.” I gave her a look as she laughed.

“Okay, but like watch…” I turned my head to see the confusion on (Y/N)’s face as she stared at the cups and ingredients with frustration. It was about ten minutes later when my girlfriend brought us our drinks.

“This is actually really good.” Blake said, offering me a drink.

“It’s delicious.” I said smiling at (Y/N). “Good job baby.”

“Thanks.” She responded with a proud smile. “Is there anything else I can do for you?”

“No, I think we are good.” She smiled before turning to go back behind the counter. I watched as she continued working for a few minutes before turning towards Blake.

“…and you say you aren’t that bad…”

“Anyways, how are things going with your quest to be famous?” I asked as she shook her head.

“It’s not a quest to be famous. It’s a quest to make music, if we become famous then so be it.” She responded as I nodded my head. “It’s going well though…I bought some equipment that we can use to make some music.”

“That’s great!”

“Yeah, and with all the time you and (Y/N) spend together…there is plenty of time for Katie and I to practice.”

“Oh my god. Does everything have to come back to that?” I questioned as the other girl grinned at me.

“Not necessarily, but your reaction is always funny.”

I rolled my eyes before continuing to do my work. By the end of (Y/N)’s shift, I could see the exhaustion as we made our way back to our rooms. We both got ready for bed before she climbed into bed with me.

“Just think about it this way…finals are almost here which means the end of the semester is almost here.”

“That is not what I want to be thinking about right now.” (Y/N) groaned as I smiled at her. I leaned over and gave her a kiss as she snuggled closer to me.

“It will fly by.”

“I hope so.”

Once the week of finals came along, I was disappointed upon realizing that Katie, Blake, and (Y/N) would finish their finals before I did.

“There’s parties going on like everyday to celebrate the end of the semester.” Katie said with a giant smile as I bit my lip to hide the amusement.

“Doesn’t mean we have to go to all of them.” Blake argued as (Y/N) nodded her head in agreement.

“Also, Alex isn’t done with her finals.” (Y/N) pointed out as I looked up from my spot.

“Don’t use me as an excuse to be antisocial.” I responded, earning a pout from the other girl.

“I don’t want to go anywhere that you’re not.” I bit my lip as I heard Blake scoff.

“That’s gross.” Katie responded, turning her attention to Blake. “Don’t be such a buzzkill. Let’s go out.”

“I’ll only go if (Y/N) goes.” Blake said as (Y/N) frowned.

“I don’t like that.” She pouted as I grinned at her.

“Go…you’ll have fun.” I said as she looked at me before sighing.

“Fine. I’ll go.”

“Yay!”

It was later that night when the trio departed…though it was Katie enthusiastically encouraging the two who were dragging their feet. I continued studying for my test the following day. I would have loved to have gone out with them, but I was extremely close to 90% and wanted to do well.

I glanced at the clock which read 2:43 am when I heard noise in the hallway. I got up and peeked out the door. I almost burst out laughing when I saw Katie shoving (Y/N) down the hallway while trying to hold up a half-conscious Blake.

“Here this belongs to you.” Katie said shoving (Y/N) towards me. The defender immediately opened her arms and hugged me.

“Someone had a lot to drink.” I was met with a lopsided smile from the girl who leaned in to give me a kiss.

“Jesus…why are you so heavy?” Katie groaned as she tried to get Blake and (Y/N)’s door open while also holding up Blake.

“Thank you, Katie.” I said as I pulled (Y/N) into the room with me before shutting the door.

“I missed you.” The defender slurred out giving me a giant smile.

“I missed you too.” I responded as she maintained her grin. “Now, let’s get you to bed.”

I spent the next few moments grabbing some clothes for her as she stood there watching me closely. Eventually, her eyes seemed to wander around the room as she started to hum to herself.

“…and I’ve heard of a love that comes in a lifetime…and I’m pretty sure that you are that love of mine…”

I walked over to her to get her to come sit so I could help her change, but instead she grabbed my hands and started swaying us while singing quite loudly.

“…cause I’m in a field of dandelions wishing on every one that you’ll be mine…miiiiine and I see forever in your eyes…” I bit my lip in amusement as she continued singing the song while attempting to get me to dance with her.

“I need to get you into bed.” I said tugging on her to get her to sit. She wouldn’t move opting to just continue singing so I walked her back so that she was sitting on Katie’s bed.

“…I think that you are the one for me…cause it gets so hard to breathe…when you’re looking at me….”

I was unable to get her to change as she laid herself back, but never letting go of me. I just stood next to the bed smiling down at her as she tried to fight the sleep that was very clearly about to happen.

“…I’ve never felt so alive and free…when you’re looking at me…I’ve never felt so happy…”

That seemed to be the end as she was out cold after that. I smiled softly at her making sure she was comfortable before leaning down to kiss her forehead. I returned to my bed clearing it off and making sure all my stuff was put away. I climbed into bed before drifting to sleep.

The next day I had to be out of the room early to go take my test, but I made sure that there was medicine for the impending headache that was most likely to come for (Y/N). I felt slightly annoyed due to the fact that I had the song from the night before stuck in my head. I don’t think I have heard that one before, but (Y/N) seemed like she knew the lyrics pretty well.

Once I was done with my test, I returned to the room to find it empty. I went across the hall and found Blake, Katie, and (Y/N) laying around it. Each one of them looked like they were in pretty bad condition.

“…I told you this would happen, but did you want to listen to me? Noooo, because what do I know?” Blake ranted as Katie and (Y/N) both rolled their eyes.

“You didn’t seem too bothered when that girl was all over you…” Katie said as Blake blushed bright red.

“You all look like shit.” I commented as they all frowned in return.

“That’s rude.” (Y/N) said before pouting at me. I rolled my eyes but made my way to the defender who had opened her arms for me. I climbed into the bed resting my head on her shoulder as she wrapped me into a hug. “How was your final?”

“It was good.” I said feeling all tension leave my body as she ran her hand up and down my back. “How is your hangover?”

“Horrible. I’m never drinking again.”

“Liar.” Blake commented from across the room.

“Fuck off.” (Y/N) responded without missing a beat.

“We had a good time. You have to admit that.” Katie said as Blake scowled.

“My head doesn’t agree.”

“I’m kind of sad I missed it.” I said as (Y/N) pouted even more at me. “I’m glad you had fun though.”

The rest of the day was spent lounging around as the other three didn’t seem eager to move at all. Eventually, it was decided that we would go out to dinner to celebrate the end of the semester. Once I was finished getting ready, I had to wait for both Katie and (Y/N) to finish. I sat at the desk in Blake and (Y/N)’s room while I waited.

“I’m in a field of dandelions wishing on everyone that you’ll be mine…” I sang softly as the song continued to play over and over in my head.

“What did you just say?” I looked up at Blake who had a shocked look on my face.

“I didn’t say anything.” I responded with confusion.

“You were singing…where did you hear that song?” she questioned as I furrowed my brows at her.

“(Y/N) was singing it to me last night when she was drunk.”

“She sang it to you?”

“Yes…why?” Blake had a look of disbelief on her face as I waited for her to respond.

“You do know that she wrote that song, right?”

“She wrote it?” I asked, feeling shock and awe wash over me.

“Yeah…it’s in her songbook. Though, if she asks, I didn’t tell you she has a songbook.”

“I didn’t know that she wrote songs.” I admitted as the other girl nodded her head.

“Yeah, she’s really good at it. I think she finds it easier to put her feelings into songs than into words.”

I sat there for a few minutes thinking about the new information I had received. If she finds it easier to put her feelings into songs, and she sang that song to me. Does that mean that she feels that way about me? My heart swelled a little at the thought that those words are what she feels for me…

Not long after my conversation with Blake, we departed to the restaurant. After dinner, we made our way back to the dorms as Blake and Katie decided they were going to have a practice session for their music.

“That was a beautiful song you sang to me by the way…” I said as (Y/N) laid next to me. She picked her head up giving me a confused look.

“What song?”

“The song you sang me last night…” Her eyes widened a little as I laughed.

“I sang you a song?”

“Yep…a song about dandelions…”

“Oh my god…” she mumbled, running her hands over her face. “I am mortified.”

“Don’t be…it was cute.” I responded removing the girls hands from her face. “Plus, Blake told you wrote the song.”

“She did?”

“She did.”

“Oh my god…”

“Stop…it’s fine.” I said as she frowned. “Did you not want me to hear it?”

“It’s not that…I just don’t show my music to everyone. It’s personal.”

“Well, I thought it was beautiful.” I said leaning over to give her a kiss. She frowned but accepted the kiss anyway.

The next couple weeks were much more relaxed now that we were on break. We got to spend more time with our families. I tried to hide my disappointment when (Y/N) was called away for national team camp. I was proud of her, but still disappointed because I would love to be called up.

She had to go to Ontario to play against Canada. They easily took home a victory with a 4-0 score. (Y/N) got subbed in during the game and I know she was ecstatic to get playing time. Once she returned, I made her tell me everything about the camp.

As we got closer to the move-in date for our apartment, I started to feel my stress grow. There was a lot to do and with (Y/N) being called away to camp at the same time that we would be moving in…my stress was at an all time high. I knew it wasn’t her fault, but I still couldn’t help but feel bothered.

“This is going so well.” Katie said as she stood in our kitchen organizing things with Blake. They were putting stuff away while I sat at the counter.

“Stop pouting.” Blake said as I glared at her.

“I’m not pouting.” I responded as she shook her head.

“Yes, you are.” Katie said as I rolled my eyes at them. “Look, this is a happy time. We have our place. We get to stay here and do whatever we want.”

“I know…I guess I just feel like it’s not complete yet.”

“(Y/N) will be back soon.” Blake said, giving me a soft smile. “Then, our little family will be complete.”

“I’m so sorry.” Katie said freezing in her spot. “Did you just admit to us being a family?”

“I already regret it.” The other girl said with a heavy sigh.

“Oh no you can’t take it back…” I said as she rolled her eyes.

“Is it too late to cancel my lease?”

“Yes, it is.” Katie said, giving Blake a giant smile.

It was a few days later when (Y/N) finally returned to me. She was moving her stuff into her room when I spotted her.

“(Y/N)!” she turned towards me with a giant smile as I launched myself at her. She easily caught me grinning as I wrapped my legs around her waist and kissed her. “I. missed. You.”

“I missed you too.” She said, giving me a soft smile. I gave her another kiss before I heard someone clear their throat. She immediately set me on the ground as (Y/N)’s mother smiled at me.

“Hi Ms. Torres, How are you?” I said trying to ignore the fact that I was blushing so hard. (Y/N) chuckled slightly before moving to grab another box.

“Hello Alex. I’m well.” She responded by giving me a hug. “Also, how many times do I have to tell you? Call me Maria.”

“Right…Maria.” I said as (Y/N) tried to hide her amusement. I glared at her as she walked over leaning to kiss my forehead.

“I think that’s everything mom.” She said turning towards her mother who smiled warmly at her daughter.

“Okay…then I suppose I should be on my way.” She responded as (Y/N) moved to walk her out.

“It really was good seeing you Alex.” Maria said as I smiled.

“You too Ms.-I mean Maria.” I said as she smiled before giving me a hug. It was a few minutes before (Y/N) returned to the apartment.

“That was a great greeting by the way.”

“I hate you.” I responded walking up to her and pulling her in for a kiss.

“I love you too.”

I smiled as she leaned in to peck my lips a few times. We were interrupted by the door opening. I groaned a little earning a small laugh from (Y/N).

“(Y/N)?” Blake stopped and stared at her best friend with shock. “I didn’t know you would be back today.”

“Surprise?” she said as Blake came over and wrapped the defender in a hug.

“I missed you.”

“That’s cute.” The defender responded as the other girl immediately let go of her.

“Yeah, I didn’t miss that.” Blake responded, turning to walk away from her. She didn’t make it far as (Y/N) reached out and yanked her by the back of the shirt pulling her in for another hug.

“I missed you too.”

“I wouldn’t say I missed you more so I missed that you know how to cook, and you can cook for all of us.”

“I knew you were using me.” She said walking over and hugging Katie.

“I use everyone. Keep up.” She said patting (Y/N)’s back. The defender let out a laugh before moving away from her.

The next few days went by in a flash as we all got used to living together. I had my worries prior to moving in about whether we would all be comfortable, but it seemed to go so well as we got to be together spending our time together.

“Where’d you go?” I looked over at (Y/N) who was giving me an odd look.

“What?”

“You like zoned out.” She responded as I frowned.

“How does it feel?” I questioned as she gave me an offended look. “You do it all the time.”

“I do not.” She defended as I nodded my head.

“Yes, you do. Blake is my witness.”

“…and here I was about to ask you to go to dinner with me…” she said as I pouted at her.

“No, wait…ask me.” I said, grabbing onto her as she shook her head.

“I don’t think I should now.”

“Please….” I exaggerated my pout as she rolled her eyes.

“ugh, fine. Alex Morgan, will you go to dinner with me?”

“I would love to.” I grinned leaning over and giving her a kiss as she rolled her eyes.

“It’s a date. Make sure to dress nice.” She said as I grinned. I got up and immediately went to go start getting ready.

Once we were ready to go, we departed and made our way to the restaurant. It was a place called, “The Henry”. I tried to hide the shock on my face at how expensive the food was on the menu, but (Y/N) didn’t seem so worried.

“We are splitting the check.” I said as she looked up at me.

“No.”

“Yes, (Y/N) this is way too expensive.” I said as she shook her head.

“No, seriously…it’s fine.” I frowned before looking back down at the menu.

“Hey, do you-” I looked up at (Y/N) noticing the deer in headlights look on her face as the color seemed to drain.

“(Y/N)?”

I turned to see what her eyes were planted on as I saw a man and woman sitting down together. The man was smiling sweetly at the woman before looking around the restaurant. His eyes stopped on (Y/N) before his face hardened. He said something to the woman sitting at the table before standing up and making his way over. I turned towards (Y/N) who seemed to shrink in her seat as he got closer.

“(Y/N)? What are you doing here?” he questioned, glaring at her as my girlfriend straightened up a little bit.

“That’s none of your business.” She responded though I could see from her hands that she was shaking a little. Instinctively, I reached across the table to take her hand in mine. She shot me a small smile before I glanced at the man. He was looking at our hands before turning an intense glare towards (Y/N).

“You should be ashamed of yourself. The audacity to do this in public. This unnatural behavior is a disgrace and it is people like you that are contributing to the downfall of this great country…” I tuned out his rant as my eyes immediately went to (Y/N) who was just looking down.

“Excuse me?” I cut him off as he stopped and glared at me. (Y/N) looked up, giving me a frantic look. “I think you are way out of line, and I am going to ask you to take your bigotry and leave us alone so we can get back to enjoying our dinner.”

“I don’t know who you think you are, but I am not done having a conversation with my daughter.”

“Then, I think it’s best we leave.” (Y/N) responded, giving me a pleading look as I immediately grabbed my things. We both stood up and tried to move passed him but were stopped when he reached out and grabbed (Y/N)’s arm. She yanked it away glaring at him. “Do. Not. Touch. Me.”

“You’ll regret this.” He said through gritted teeth as she stared at him.

“I’m sure I will.” She said turning and grabbing my hand pulling me towards the exit.

The ride back to the apartment was quiet. I wasn’t sure what to say as she seemed lost in her own thoughts. When we got back to the apartment, she immediately beelined it for her bedroom as I followed her silently.

I watched her from the doorway as she stood in the middle of her room quiet before she started to pace. She started rubbing her chest as her face screwed up into a mix of anger and pain. I could hear her breathing become shallower as tears started running down her face.

I moved closer to her immediately hugging her from behind and pulling her towards her bed. She immediately collapsed into me as I pulled her face into my hands.

“Hey, look at me…” she looked at me with bloodshot eyes as I ran my thumb softly over her face. “Concentrate on your breathing. Stay here with me okay…”

She nodded her head as she tried to gain control over her breathing. It took a few minutes of encouraging words and trying to get her to match my own breathing before she started to calm down a little.

“That’s it. I am so proud of you.” I said softly, pulling her closer and kissing her forehead. I wrapped my arms around her as she rested her head on my shoulder. I kissed the back of her head as she buried her head into my arm.

“It hurts…” she mumbled as I nodded my head.

“I know, but I got you okay…no one can hurt you. I won’t let them.” I responded as she whimpered a little.

We sat like that for another few minutes before I felt her become heavier. I recognized that she had gone to sleep as I gently tried to lay her on her bed. Her grip on me tightened a little as I accepted that I probably wouldn’t be getting away from her anytime soon. Not that I wanted to.

I’m not sure how much time passed before she started to stir awake. I waited patiently as she came to before she stared at me. Her face was blank as I waited for her to move.

“Hi.” I said softly as she stared at me.

“Hi…”

“How are you feeling?” I asked as she looked around the room for a moment.

“Like shit…”

“I can imagine…”

“Do we have to talk about it?” I stared at her for a moment before I sighed.

“No, but I think you will feel better if you do…” she was silent for a moment and I almost thought we wouldn’t hear anything before she spoke.

“I hate him…” she looked down as I waited for her to continue. “He makes me feel so small and he abandoned my mom…but somehow I still let him make me feel this way.”

“He’s your dad.” I said as she looked at me with tears in her eyes. “You can’t just turn that off.”

“I don’t want him to have that power over me.”

“I know, but we can’t help it…but I am telling you that he is wrong about you. You are the most extraordinary person I have ever met, and I am thankful everyday that I get to be a part of your life.”

“Really?”

“Yeah…you are so loved. I love you. Your mom loves you. Blake loves you. There are so many people who love you and want the best for you. You are the brightest light in all of our lives, and I can promise you my life would be absolutely horrible if you weren’t in it.”

“I love you too.” She said as I gave her a small encouraging smile. “I’m sorry our date got ruined.”

“It’s okay. How about we order some pizza and just find something to watch on tv?” she nodded her head as I smiled at her. I leaned in and kissed her forehead before standing up and going to order our pizza.

We spent the rest of the night in bed with each other. I did my absolute best to remind (Y/N) how perfect she was and how absolutely grateful we all are to have her in our lives. I knew that it wasn’t going to be easy for her to get over what happened, and that all I could do was just be there for her and try to offer her support. I had no doubt it was going to be a long and hard road, but I would do whatever I needed to help her.

To be continued...

[artificialqueens]

Tree House Kisses, Chapter 38 (Adorney) - Scorpio and Veronica

A/N: Click here for previous chapters. And thank you so much to @saiphl for the beta help!! XO!

Chapter Summary: The girls spend a summer apart, but then start their senior year, closer than ever.

Chapter 38: Feelings

Courtney’s dad had moved with his girlfriend to Berkeley earlier in the year, and both of her parents unilaterally decided that she should spend the summer with him for some “quality time.” She’d argued, she’d protested, she’d pleaded with Karen, she’d even cried; but in the end she had no choice but to go along with the plan, sullenly packing her things and boarding the train, defeated. Her only solace was that Roy was doing a summer program in Stanford for a month, which meant that at least they could still see each other on the weekends for part of the time she was there.

COURTNEY: JFC I’m gonna be sleeping on a goddamn fold out couch all summer. This is shit.

ADORE: Awww, so sorry, princess. Xx

COURTNEY: Lol, fuck you. You have no idea what this is like

ADORE: That’s true. I haven’t seen my dad for like ten years

COURTNEY: WAH WAH WAHHH YOU ALWAYS HAVE TO WIN

COURTNEY: ;)

ADORE: lol

The truth was, Courtney hadn’t really spent much time with her dad since the divorce. Sometimes it made her sad, thinking about how close they used to be. She tried to keep an open mind, but a big part of her was still angry about him having an affair, turning their lives upside-down, leaving her mom...leaving her.

Adore was right, though. As far as absentee fathers went, things could be much worse. One night, while he sat on the sofa (the one that doubled as the least comfortable bed she ever had) watching TV, Courtney wandered over and sat down next to him.

He looked up from the TV, surprised, a smile spreading across his face.

“Hey, kiddo.”

“Hi.” Courtney shifted slightly, tried to shake the horrible feeling that she was sitting next to a grown man that she barely knew. “Whatcha watching?”

“Just the news...if things go well this year, we can take both the house and the senate,” Peter told her. “And in 2008, that fucking shit-for-brains will finally be done and we can get the White House, too.”

“That would be awesome,” Courtney agreed, letting her head rest on her father’s shoulder. He wasn’t perfect, that was for damn sure...but when it came down to it, she supposed she was lucky to have him.

-

Meanwhile, Adore had gotten a summer job as a counselor at an arts day camp, and soon began spending her days surrounded by loud, attention-seeking child star wannabes. Every day, she came home and collapsed in exhaustion, vowing to never, under any circumstances, ever have children.

COURTNEY: How’s camp?

ADORE: The worst

COURTNEY: I’m sorry

ADORE: It’s all good. How’s the homewrecker?

COURTNEY: Weird

ADORE: Is she teaching you any good stripper moves?

COURTNEY: No, she just like, chain smokes and talks to her birds

ADORE: She has BIRDS?

COURTNEY: Yeah man, I told you. WEIRD

ADORE: What are the birds’ names?

COURTNEY: Something in Russian, I dunno. I just call them Boris and Natasha

ADORE: Lol you’re so corny

COURTNEY: I did meet some pretty cool anarchist guys down the block  

ADORE: What’s their band called?

COURTNEY: Who said they have a band?

ADORE: What’s their band called, Courtney?

COURTNEY: Pussy Whisper

ADORE: LOLOLOLOL

-

COURTNEY: Okay, so...this is going to shock you…

ADORE: ???

COURTNEY: The Pussy Whisper dudes?

ADORE: Oh jeez, what?

COURTNEY: They’re gross

ADORE: Yeah, no shit

COURTNEY: i just really liked what Tristan had to say about late stage capitalism

ADORE: Right

COURTNEY: And Grant said I was smart

ADORE: Well, that was your first clue

COURTNEY: HEY!!!

ADORE: Lol, not because you’re not. Because dudes in a band called “Pussy Whisper” that call you smart are up to some no-good shit

COURTNEY: Right. Ugh

ADORE: Bird lady still a fucking weirdo?

COURTNEY: Yeah. Although she did take me to a yoga class this morning, so that was nice. She’s actually maybe not the most vile person on the planet

ADORE: Awww, look at you, falling in love

COURTNEY: Shut up

-

Once Courtney got over her initial resistance, she had to admit that Berkely was somewhat cool. Certainly more her speed than the bland suburban wasteland she was used to. She spent most of her days wandering around used book stores, head shops, or combing through racks of cute vintage dresses. One afternoon, sunbathing in the backyard of her dad’s apartment building (which was a converted Victorian house that she also had to regretfully admit was pretty charming), she made friends with a very affectionate marmalade-colored kitten. Turned out, the cat belonged to their downstairs neighbor, and soon Courtney found herself fully enchanted with the older woman.

COURTNEY: Okay I found a much better new friend than the PW boys. She’s our downstairs neighbor and she’s like 70 and so cool. She has pink hair and all her clothes are made of hemp. She’s gonna take me to an Iraq War protest on Saturday.

ADORE: Oh jeez. You’re gonna come back with white person dreads, aren’t you?

COURTNEY: lol it’s a nice look

ADORE: IT IS NOT

-

ADORE: Abortion should be legal until the kids are like...12 years old, at least

COURTNEY: Campers getting on your nerves?

ADORE: If I snap, will you visit me in prison?

COURTNEY: Of course! I’ll bake a nail file into a cake for you and everything. XOXO

ADORE: Good cake or some bay area bullshit?

COURTNEY: Gluten free agave-sweetened carob cake, courtesy of Patsy

ADORE: Fuck off

COURTNEY: Don’t insult Patsy. She’s been protesting since Vietnam, she’s awesome.

-

ADORE: HEY CHEERLEADER THIS IS WILLAM! YOU’RE A SLUT AND WE MISS YOU!

ADORE: AND I’M VERY DISAPPOINTED THAT YOU DIDN’T FUCK THE PUSSY WHISPERERS

COURTNEY: Sorry bunny

ADORE: He’s high

COURTNEY: And you?

ADORE: Meeee? Whaaaaaat?

ADORE: Yes lol

COURTNEY: Lol, have fun

-

COURTNEY: Would it be really bad if I liked Katya?

ADORE: Omg are you gonna start calling her Mommy?

COURTNEY: Shut up!

COURTNEY: But seriously...it would be like, disloyal to my mom if I liked her, right?

ADORE: Are you gonna start adopting birds?

COURTNEY: No, I just think she’s kind of funny sometimes. I’m a terrible daughter

ADORE: Well, your mom IS the one who sent you up there for the summer. So…

COURTNEY: True

-

ADORE: So. Something happened last night that was...uh…

ADORE: Very

ADORE: ...

COURTNEY: ???

ADORE: Give me a minute...I’m processing...

COURTNEY: Tell me!

ADORE: Well, we started in Violet’s basement, drinking, and I’m not sure how but somehow it ended up being like 10 people

COURTNEY: Aww, was Violet sad I wasn’t there? Did she cry?

ADORE: lol, totally

COURTNEY: So what happened???

ADORE: Yeah, so...I went out to the backyard to smoke and Trin came and like...I’m not sure exactly how it happened, but I think I made out with her

COURTNEY: WHOA

ADORE: Yeah

COURTNEY: Is she gay???

ADORE: No, definitely not. We were just like, drunk and high

COURTNEY: Is everything cool between you??

ADORE: Yeah, I think so. We were laughing about it this morning. But like, I still feel a little bad.

COURTNEY: Why do you feel bad?

ADORE: I mean, I dunno. I don’t want people to think that I’m like, some predatory asshole, you know?

COURTNEY: No one would think that

ADORE: My track record might disagree

COURTNEY: The only thing your track record shows is you’re a ho

ADORE: WOW

COURTNEY: I WAS KIDDING!!!!

ADORE: lol, I know

COURTNEY: XOXOXOXO

-

As much as Courtney tried, and as much as she made her peace with her summer surroundings, by the time August rolled around, she began to get increasingly homesick. Missing her mom, her bedroom, even Grandma Muriel. But especially, missing Adore.

COURTNEY: I really miss you

COURTNEY: Like so much

ADORE: Me too

COURTNEY: No like SO much

ADORE: Are you high?

COURTNEY: No, are you?

ADORE: A little lol

COURTNEY: I’m not high. I just love you.

ADORE: Aww, thanks babe

-

“DORY!!” Courtney squealed, practically leaping from her car the second she pulled into the driveway. She’d texted Adore from her last stop for gas, but she was thrilled to see her best friend actually waiting for her.

She wrapped Adore into a tight hug, her excitement causing her to pepper Adore’s entire face with wet kisses.

“Hi, okay, stop it,” Adore giggled. “Nice car, by the way.”

“Oh yeah, I know, it’s pretty great. Peter gets a gold star for that one.” Courtney glanced back at the car, her dad’s old Honda Accord, shaking her new bangs out of her face. He’d surprised her with the keys just last week, and it had almost made her forgive him for leaving in the first place...almost. “It was kind of scary to do that whole drive alone, though. I’m very thankful to have made it in one piece.”

“Me too,” Adore said, with a grin that told Courtney she was home. “Now that you’re back, it’s gonna be a fuckin’ party.”

Courtney laid a head on her shoulder, sighing happily.

“You’re going to Darienne’s goodbye party on Wednesday, right?”

“Yeah, of course. Omigod! Dory! I wanted to make those peanut butter cupcakes that she loves, but you know I’m just absolute shit at decorating, can you help?”

“What on earth makes you think I’d be good at cupcake decorating?” Adore laughed.

“I dunno, you’re better at art than me,” Courtney said. “Plus, it’ll just be more fun with you.”

Adore pressed a kiss to her forehead. “Count me in.”  

-

School was going to be starting back up soon, and as Adore looked around the party at her friends, she couldn’t help but feel a little ambivalent. Summer had just been so nice, and having that small taste of freedom made her long to be done with school altogether.

Tonight, there was a big group at Pearl’s house--her usual friends as well as a bunch of the neighborhood kids, enjoying the pool and the warm evening air. Violet, Fame and Trinity lounged in the hot tub with April, watching the sun set. Pearl was standing at the grill, living her butch fantasy as she cooked up food for her guests, swatting Bob away with as he peered over her shoulder, trying to “help.”

It was a little bittersweet--Darienne had already left for Pepperdine a few weeks earlier, and Jamin for Cal Poly. Even though they weren’t as close as they used to be, it still felt strange, somehow, for them to be missing. Hell, it was even weird for Alyssa to be gone, the loudmouth head cheerleader now torturing people at UC San Diego, probably already sorority president.

A handful of people were dancing, including Courtney and Willam, twirling until they were dizzy and laughing.

“Ugh, I don’t want school to start!” Willam suddenly whined, reflecting Adore’s feelings exactly.

“I know, but this year we’re coming back as seniors, and we’re gonna rule the school,” Courtney said, imitating the line from Grease perfectly.

“Oh really? You think you’re Rizzo?” Adore challenged her.

“Why can’t I be Rizzo?” she demanded.

“Bitch, you are Sandy and you know it,” Adore laughed, grabbing a beer and sitting down on the back steps.

“I can be Rizzo if I want! Fuck you!”

“Yeah, lesbian! How dare you put cheerleader in a box! She can be whatever she wants!” Willam cried.

“That's right,” Courtney added, “I mean, I did spend all summer hanging out with a prostitute. What did you do? Day Camp?”

“I was a counselor,” Adore replied, laughing. She reached into the cooler and pulled out a bottle. “Here, have another drink. And I thought Katya was a stripper, not a prostitute.”

“You don't know her. It's a very blurry line,” Courtney explained, taking the offered wine cooler.

Willam grabbed Courtney’s hand and pulled her away, spinning her around and around. “Less talking, more dancing!”

Adore shook her head, watching them with a smile, lighting up a joint. Roy sat down beside her--the last of his class, since UCLA didn’t start for a few more weeks.

“Hey, Delano. How ya doing, man?”

“Good...bro.”

Roy flashed some dimples at her, then just sat for a minute, unusually quiet, as they both watched their friends dancing like fools. Willam dipped Courtney low to the ground and she shrieked and giggled.

“God, she’s so fucking beautiful,” he said.

Adore wasn’t sure if he was talking to her or himself. She nodded, leaning against the banister and sighing slightly.

When Roy spoke again, it was quiet. “I know, you know. How lucky I am.”

Adore looked at him, considering her reply. Finally, she just nodded and said, “Good.”

Roy gave her another smile.

“Make sure she stays outta trouble while I’m away.”

“I think I’m probably the least qualified person for that job,” Adore laughed, then held out the joint.

“Thanks, I’m cool.”

“Debatable,” Adore retorted, taking another hit.

Roy shook his head, chuckling.

“I’m gonna miss you too, Delano.”

“Aww...shut up.”

-

On the first day of their senior year, Courtney and Adore walked out of their fourth period economics class together, giggling over Laganja’s unfortunate new haircut.

“I feel bad for saying so, but it’s just so...”

“Hideous?” Adore supplied, and Courtney giggled some more.

“Yeah. Poor thing. Although it’s hard to say whether her hair is more or less tragic than Mr. Sutton’s awkwardness. He’s like a baby deer.”

“I know! But like, imagine trying to get the respect of students who are pretty much your age,” Adore laughed.

“How old do you think he is, anyway?”

“Uh, I don’t know, but I’m pretty sure he graduated with Kim and Angie. I think I remember him from when Angie did show choir.”

Courtney grabbed onto Adore’s arm, eyes wide.

“Omigod, you’re right! I knew he looked familiar!” she exclaimed.

It wasn’t until they were halfway down the hill that Adore noticed Courtney still walking with her. She hadn’t split off to go sit with the neighborhood kids like past years, simply walked beside her towards the oak tree, where Trinity and Willam already sat, sword-fighting with breadsticks.

“Are you...planning to join us?” Adore asked curiously, and Courtney bit her lip.

“Is that okay? I mean...it’s just a little weird without Roy and Darienne, so I thought…you can say no if-”

“Of course it’s okay!” Adore pulled her in for a side hug. “Everyone loves you, you know that.”

“Everyone?” Courtney asked, one eyebrow nearly to her hairline.

“Almost everyone.” Adore smiled ruefully. “And anyway, I want you here, so she can just deal with it.”

As it turned out, Adore was right. Everyone welcomed Courtney enthusiastically with open arms. And even Violet was unusually cool about it, containing her disapproval to some muttered asides to Fame, who promptly thumped her on the shoulder every time, akin to bopping a puppy on the nose with a newspaper.

Courtney didn’t seem to mind either way, cheerfully trading barbs with Willam and letting Fame “fix” her eyebrows, which were deemed “just too pale.”

“Are your pubes blonde, too?” Willam asked curiously, and Trinity began choking on her sandwich from laughter.

“Gross,” Courtney said, wrinkling her nose.  

“Actually, are they? I’m kind of curious,” Trinity said.

“Come on, cheerleader, just tell us!” Willam urged.

“You know, I quit cheerleading almost a year ago,” Courtney said.

“So?”

“He still calls me ‘New Girl,’” Pearl explained.

“Why are you stalling? Show! Me! Your! Pussy! Hairs!” Willam said, and Fame put her whole head in her hands, letting out a horrified groan before going back to Courtney’s eyebrows.  

“Careful, Bill, or you might get what you wish for,” Courtney sang, staring him down. “You really wanna see my pussy?”

“Uhh...no. Well, maybe...but no. Or…” Willam’s brow furrowed.

“Shit, you broke his little gay brain,” Pearl said, laughing.

“Omigod, that’s so much better!” Fame sat back on her heels, holding up a compact so that Courtney could see her new defined eyebrows.

“Oh wow, that is better! Thank you!”

After snapping the compact shut and handing it back to Fame, Courtney caught Adore’s eye, both of their faces melting into a grin. As Adore buried her smile into her sandwich, she couldn’t help but think about what a change it was from last year.

Maybe a sign of good things to come...or maybe the calm before the storm.

[stonecoldjerseyfox]

Jersey on my mind (part 31)

The smell of buttered, barbecue corn on the cobs mixed with the scent of burning firewood makes Mila’s mouth water like the cookie monster catching sight of chocolate chip cookies, as she and Juri make their way down the dark street.

“Can you smell that?” She asks Juri. “Smells nice, right?”

Juri nods eagerly and the blue eyes glistens hungrily. 

She’s holding a bottle of vodka in her right hand and Juri’s hand in her left as they struts down the street towards the bonfire and the sound of chatting people. Juri’s dressed up in a knitted sweater, sent from mama in Russia for his second birthday. The shirt was way too big for a two year old, so Mila left it in a drawer until they had to leave, to escape when all hell broke loose. It’s maroon with white, traditional pattern over the chest. 

“Are you excited?” Mila asks as they pass Jessie’s house, and a sad feeling overwhelms her. Poor Jessie. She shifts her focus from the now empty house to Juri, who nods at her. “Yeah. Me too. It might be fun. You remember the barbecues at Ellie’s and Joe’s?” Juri nods once again. Of course he remembers ‘grams’ and ‘gramps’. It felt weird to Mila that he knew her foster parents better than his real grandmother, whom he called ‘baba’. But baba was always baba. Juri gestures at her, expresses a feeling of longing for the three of them. “I miss them too, Malysh.” She smiles. “Think about the barbecue.”

That’s a thought that cheers both of them up. Mila loves barbecues. She has experienced several very different variants of the event during her short lifetime. Hot summer evenings at the Dacha at home in Russia, when the whole neighborhood gathered from the surrounding summer cottages in the largest garden and built a barbecue of old brick or sheet metal. Everyone contributed food and the vodka was lined up on a table. They danced, sang, there was always someone playing the accordion and some dexterous ribbons of wreaths. The smell of smoke settled deep in the clothes, but it did not matter, it was part of the experience itself. It was so easy and homely. In the wee hours, when half the vodka ration was consumed, there could be both hopak dancing and sniping. During the autumn harvest, people also grilled, especially during forest excursions and mushroom picking. Mama fried mushrooms over an open fire while papa boned fish. In the winter, they did the same thing, dressed up in several layers of clothes and fur hats. Their breaths stood like ice clouds from their mouths, but they didn’t freeze and the fire kept their cheeks glowing hot. 

In the States, she got to experience a different kind of barbecue, not as folksy, but still nice in that American, exaggerated way. Joe Galka owned a Weber grill, a piece as big as a piano, Mila thought, to which he was very attached. He could grill most things. In the summers there was a barbecue almost every weekend and friends and family were invited. Mila’s, Billy’s and Adam’s friends were always invited. Even in the States, people brought food to the festivities; meringue pies, apple pies, ribs dripped with sauce, mashed potatoes, salads and god knows what. Significantly less strong booze than the Russian festivities, but all the more pale beer; disgusting Corona and Budweiser, that the middle-aged men, gathered around Joe’s grill, wearing the same type of cargo shorts and short-sleeved shirts, happily sipped. And sniping was out of the question in the suburbs. When Mila met Jim and they went on hikes just the two of them, Mila went in childhood. They grilled over an open fire in the woods, or at a beach, using firewood and matches, an old frying pan and some simple tools. They brought food, coffee, booze and, God forbid, a big bag of marshmallows. Jim loved those grilled, melting sugar bombs, while Mila couldn’t stand them, instead preferring grilled fruit with a little honey and cinnamon. Then they picked out the guitar and the harmonica and sat there, playing and singing Creedence, country and other great songs, in the light of the fire, drinking booze, hearing the waves smoothly run into the sandy shore, the leves rattle in the breeze. 

Despite the fact that Mila sees herself as an established barbecue visitor by now, after exploring her way through several barbecue cultures, this is a new version. Post-apocalyptic barbecue. 

“Wonder what food we get, except for potatoes and corn.” Mila says. Juri chuckles at the thought of an all potato and corn barbecue. “Maybe some-” Mila thinks. “Green beans? Tomatoes? Oh, and what if they have found some broccoli! You’d like that.” 

Earlier in the day, Mila took Juri out outside the safe zone and went on a journey of discovery in a direction they had not previously gone. After 1,2 miles they came to an open field which Mila immediately recognized as a vast potato field. There were a few, ravaged plants sticking out of the soil, but the chance that there were a lot of potatoes hidden underneath was huge. She let out a roar of joy at the discovery and frightened a couple of birds that angrily lifted from the untouched, rugged earth, and flew away to calmer lands. Some distance away, a barn loomed and Mila purposefully steered her steps towards the grayish-brown building, where the paint had begun to flake from the walls. She pushed open the door and went in, made sure that no walkers were lurking before releasing Juri from the harness and instructing him to search for potato sacks, and other useful things. Mila found the potato sacks, while Juri found a rusty shovel. They returned to the field and Mila began scanning the earth for a potentially lush piece to start digging on. Then she started digging, while Juri began to scrape the ground by hand. The sweat evaporated from her forehead, but being out there in the big field with Juri, performing body work, created an endorphin surcharge within her she hadn’t known for a long time. She felt alive. The smell of the earth, the still breeze and the sound of the shovel shaft digging into the ground. It was agrarian, made her homesick for Russia, to the Russian countryside. Sure, it was barren and vast beyond infinity, but she loved it. Her strong, Russian soul needed an outlet right there and then. Mila started singing. A hair-raising, Russian partisan song, something her grandfather sang for her as a child. Then she needed to cheer up the mood a bit, so she started singing “Panic” by The Smiths instead. Whether it was merry was questionable, but the melody was catchy. She then went down on her knees and started to dig with her hands in the soil. Suddenly she felt something in the ground, and triumphantly she pulled out the lower part of a potato plant, where surely eight or ten potatoes were still attached, and they looked really good!

“Jackpot!” Mila exclaimed. 

While digging and tearing up cluster after cluster of potatoes, Mila and Juri talked about all the good potato dishes they could now make, making their mouth water with saliva. Potato gratin, fried potatoes with dill, moussaka with potatoes, one of their absolute favorites. They stopped digging after a sack was filled. Mila had to carry it home, and the sack probably weighed well over 30 kilos, so they stopped working and decided to come back another day, by car. 

“Sorry, malenkiy. Time to use your legs.” said Mila, hoisting the sack onto her shoulder, next to the rucksack. Well, time to use mine as well, she thought and felt the heavy bag weighing her down. If Grandma could carry two full buckets of water from the well twice a day for seventy years, I should be able to carry thirty kilos of potatoes back to Alexandria.

Thank goodness she had tough, lanky muscles. And they didn’t run into anyone on the way back. Soaked in sweat and back inside the Alexandria walls, Mila dropped the heavy bag in front of Carol in the kitchen. Carol looked as if she could not believe her eyes at the sack. Mila went and took a much-needed shower, while Carol and Juri started peeling potatoes. She then helped Rick chop wood. 

“Ya’ good at this.” Rick said as Mila, once again dripping with sweat after that very unnecessary shower, easily split firewood after firewood with the other ax.

“It may sound like a stereotype, but in Russia you learn this early in life, if you do not want to freeze to death.” Mila huffed and wiped her forehead on her arm. “Grandma and grandpa didn’t have electricity. Then you had to chop wood.”

She took a second shower an hour later, and got herself and Juri dressed up in, not fancy clothes, but clean ones, not covered in soil, dirt and potato peel. In front of the mirror she inspected the scar after the wolves machete. It was still red and bumpy, but had healed nicely, a slight miracle since she hadn’t been taking care of it nearly as well as Denise told her to. She then stepped into a pair of blue, worn jeans and ripped a top over her head. While Juri brushed his hair, Mila inspected him and cracked open a bottle of vodka. 

She’s accustomed to pre-parties and has been an avid supporter of the phenomenon since her teenage years; never arrive sober to a party, or a funeral, or anything really if you’re an alcoholic like Mila.

She looks at the brand new bottle of Russian standard in her hand, contemplating if she should sweep it at the spot to increase her chances of ‘mingle and jingle’. Before she turns thought into action Maggie comes up at her right side. 

“One could think everything was somewhat- I dunno, pre- all this.” Maggie says and lifts her eyebrows underneath the side swept brown hair.

“Feels odd.” Mila admits. “Nice, but strange. Be happy you don’t feel sick yet. The barbecue smell would kill you.”

Maggie looks down at the grey tank top underneath the checked shirt, smiles at the sight of her own stomach. It’s not prominently pouting yet, but in a few weeks it won’t be possible to hide the bump. 

“Can’t wait.” Maggie replies ironically and nods towards the vodka bottle.

“You’re prepared for disaster or what?”

“Mouth water.” Mila says simply. “Bad breath.”

“Might be because of the mouth water.” Maggie grins as they catch sight of the bonfire and the Alexandrians, gathered around it. Maggie sniffs in the air as a puff of grilled meat comes their way. “Okay, I’m starting to get really hungry. Holy moly.”

“Preggers cravings.” Mila teases at the same time as she sees Abraham walking towards them, dressed in a button down shirt for the occasion underneath his jacket. “Looking sharp.” She greets him as he reaches the three of them. His red hair burns even brighter in the light of the flames from the fire. 

“Gotta make the best of the opportunity. It’s a party.” He smiles and places a big, bearded kiss on her cheek and gives Maggie a warm hug before he squats and holds up his big palm towards Juri. “High five, little man.” Juri slams his small hand into the big man’s and looks really happy. “Heard ya’ found the potatoes.” Abraham says excitedly. “Great job, dude!” 

Maggie and Mila look at each other. Yup, Juri’s the hero and Mila’s the burro, carrying the goodies more than 1,2 miles back to Alexandria. Nah, I can handle it, she thinks as she sees Juri’s proud grin, being the potato boss for the night. 

“Come on, Romeo.” Mila starts walking towards the fire, that lures her towards its glowing sphere of heat and safety, awakening something primitive within her, a feeling that fire equals safety. 

All of the Alexandria residents seem to be attending. Even Carl sits on a log, dragged in front of the fire, next to Aaron and Morgan. His head is wrapped up and he looks a million times better than two days ago. The color has returned to his cheeks and the sheriffs hat rests homely at the brown curls. Mila smiles at the sight. Rick appears in her field of sight at the same time. He looks fresh out of the shower and as he approaches she clearly feels a faint scent of men’s perfume. 

“Carol’s over the moon with the potatoes.” He greets her as he stops in front of her. 

“Glad I could contribute.” Mila says. “Where’s Daryl?” She looks around, searches for the broad man on the other side of the bonfire and in the shadows, but he’s nowhere to be seen. “I haven’t seen him today.” 

Rick shrugs a little, as to say ‘who knows’. 

“Come on.” He nods with his head to the side. “Let’s get ya’ beer.”

“Great.” 

While Juri runs off on his own, around the bonfire to sit with Carl, Mila follows Rick over to a table, set with beer and soda. Michonne’s leaning up against the table top with a Coke in her hand, probably mixed up to a Jack and Coke if Mila knows her right, talking to Sasha and Eugene, who, judging by the strong scent, have bathed himself in shaving water. Carol, an Alexandrian woman and Denise sets the table with bowls of food. Mila’s astonished over the amounts of different dishes and sides they managed to put together for the evening. Sasha and Abraham went on a run and found an abandoned greenhouse, which hid all sorts of vegetables that miraculously survived on their own during the apocalypse. Another group of Alexandrians went fishing and also ran upon a few bewildered chickens, who had to sacrifice their lives for the sake of the festivities. 

“The wall’s coming along nicely.” Mila says as she lets her gaze wander to the wall, where the big gaping hole where the church tower crashed through about a week ago. The debris is all gone and the hole is temporarily fixed with a few cars, but the structure that's supposed to become the new, reinforced wall, is already appearing. 

“It’s gonna be solid.” Eugene says and nods, trying his absolute best to seem cool about it. 

Mila’s been amused by him ever since he introduced himself to her; he’s intelligent, awkward and quite strange, but he certainly entertains her with all his clumsiness and strange talking. Despite her nearly ten years in the States, language is still the biggest challenge. Mila’s still learning new words and expressions and Eugene has undoubtedly made it a challenge for her to understand what he’s saying from time to time.

“Yippie.” Mila preaches as Rick puts a beer bottle in her hand. She takes it and chugs the bottle immediately, feeling a sudden rush of intense thirst only an alcoholic can feel in the presence of beer and booze. The intellectual with the prominent mullet stares at her as she takes the last sip of the bottle and puts it away. His expression pokes at her shenanigan-nerve, fuck she has to mess a little with him. “I’m into some real kinky shit after five bottles.” She therefore says and grins wolf-like at Eugene. 

Eugene’s cheeks turn red like the fire next to him and he swallows. Michonne laughs into her can and both Rick and Sasha grins, struggling not to laugh. Mila reaches forward and pats poor Eugene on the arm.

“Just fucking with you.” She says and blinks. “Cheers.” And she opens the vodka bottle and offers him the first sip. “Here, it’s good for the nerves.”

“You’re a real tearaway.” Sasha says and breaks off the cap on a new Corona light.

“Extremely poor impulse control.” Mila takes back the vodka bottle and takes a bountiful sip, once again feeling the deep sense of thirst down her throat. “It gets worse with age, I notice.” She peeks behind Sasha at the table. “So, what’s for dinner?” 

Carol, who happens to hear her question, comes up to the group at the table, holding a pie between the oven mittens.

“A real feast, that’s for sure.” She explains and puts the pie down. “Ribs, chicken, fish, vegetables, potatoes. Daryl must’ve hit the jackpot, he brought back an entire forest.” Carol smiles and removes the checked oven mittens from her hands. “And pie for dessert.”

“Are we celebrating something?” Sasha says. 

“Being alive?” Michonne taps her fingers at the can.

“Anyone having their birthday soon, or just had? That could be a reason.” Eugene suggests. 

“Don’t even know what date it is.” Mila says and takes another sip of the vodka. “Mine’s in June.”

“Gotta celebrate something.” Eugene continues.

“How ‘bout-” Rick begins. “A party for those who can’t be here.”

“A death party?” Mila raises her eyebrows at Rick. 

“That’s morbid.” Sasha wrinkles her nose.

“Could work.” Mila continues. “Russian funerals often turn into parties. At first people cry something incredibly for hours and hours and hours- Then you drink until you can’t feel feelings anymore.”

“Sounds even more weird.” Eugene expresses. “I like Rick’s idea better.” 

“I’m gonna drink anyway.” Mila snorts and continues to drink. At least she’s dressed up somewhat properly for a funeral reception; black top, black leather jacket and, yeah the fedora might be questionable, but at least she wears black boots! 

They sit down and eat when Aaron, Glenn, Rosita and Gabriel have sliced the grilled meat and put it on the buffet table. Juri’s plate is filled with potatoes and vegetables as well as Mila’s and he’s got a juice box safely placed between his cute feet. They sit on a log with Rick and Carol; eating, drinking and talking while the fire crackles, the cicadas sing behind the wall. The sky above them is starry and the sparks from the fire rises towards the gleaming stars, millions of lightyears away. But Daryl is nowhere to be seen. Where the hell is he? Mila looks around every now and then, but Rick assures her that he’s alright. Why wouldn’t he? To calm her mind, she empties the vodka bottle and runs to get another one, just as the party attendants does a turn two at the buffet.

“Ey, look who’s back.” Rick suddenly says and looks at Mila- no, over her shoulder, behind her. 

Mila turns on the log and looks behind her. Daryl comes walking down the street towards them. In the warm light of the fire Mila can see that he’s fine, unharmed, but holds something behind his back. She gets up from the log, a movement that makes the others pause their conversations and laughter to look at her. Mila gets ready to give him a scolding, but Daryl’s facial expression makes her change her mind. It’s soft, somewhat gawky, but yet soft and not stern and grumpy. It strikes her there and then that he hasn’t looked surly at all lately, at least not while looking at her. She takes a step over the log and walks to meet him. The wrinkle created between her eyebrows softens as he stops in front of her in the light of the big fire. 

“Where’ve you been?” She asks and crosses her arms over her chest.

“Had a thing to do.” He says and screws a little, but keeps his back straight. “I’m here now.”

“Yeah, I can see that.” Mila looks him straight in the eyes. “But where were you? I was worried.”

Instead of giving her a verbal answer, Mila has come to understand Daryl’s idea, that words are unnecessary sometimes well by now. He takes out what he’s hiding behind his back, and holds it out for her. A guitar. An acoustic sunburst Epiphone, with engraved flowers on the pickguard. Mila stares at the beautiful instrument as Daryl hands it over to her; the shimmery pearly detailing in the maple neck, steel strings and rosewood details. She lifts her gaze and looks at Daryl in awe. 

“Though ya’d like it.” Daryl looks at her, not sure if she’s happy or disappointed. “Ya’ said ya’ played.” 

Yeah, yes she did say that. But she didn’t think he’d remembered. She can’t speak. Instead, Mila wraps her arms around his neck, with the guitar’s neck still in a firm grip. The last time she got a guitar, it was Jim who surprised her with one. He blindfolded her and drove her to the music store where he led her in, like a blind. Mila stumbled on the threshold and tore off her blindfold, red in the face with anger over his shenanigans. But the anger ran off when she saw where she was.

“Pick one.”

“Pick what?”

“A guitar.” Jim reached out his arms to his side, to the guitars hanging around the walls of the shop. “Whatever one you want.”

Mila picked a light sunburst Fender that time. It was left behind in Brooklyn along with Jim’s old, trusted Gibson. At least their guitars were together. 

“Thank you.” Mila whispers into his ear and releases her grip around Daryl’s neck.

It’s one of the finest, most thoughtful gifts she has received in a long time. She squeezes the neck and admires the wooden piece. He really went off and found her a guitar. Around them, the other inhabitants have paused whatever they’re doing, to look at them. Abraham is the one that finally breaks the silence, still chewing on a glazed rib.  

“Well, whatcha waitin’ for? Play it, Jersey.” He points at the guitar with the bone.

Her mouth turns into a wide grin. My God, she hasn’t played in awhile and the guitar isn’t even tuned. She takes Daryl’s hand, intervenes her fingers with his and drags him off to the overturned log, steps over it and sits down next to Juri, who looks overjoyed with the possibility of some live music. Her number one fan. Daryl sits down next to her and Carol hands him a plate of food. It’s like someone pressed ‘play’. Everyone starts talking to each other again, eating and drinking, just as before Daryl appeared with the guitar. While Daryl eats, Mila begins to tune the guitar, at the same time as she gets meaningful glances from both Maggie and Carol, who blink at her.

“I did not know you played guitar.” Says Carl and looks wide-eyed at the guitar.

“I'm full of surprises.” Mila smiles cheeky at him.

“Can you make requests?” Rick says and takes a sip of his Corona.

“Depends on the request.” Mila replies. She knows that Rick has a similar taste in music as she; they have more than once hummed along to the same country songs while working, so he won’t have to be disappointed. “I’m a little rusty.” And not nearly drunk enough to feel completely at ease with performing in front of these people, she thinks and looks around. For some reason this is different than before. Different from the bars and the family gatherings with the Galka’s and Jim. “I’ll punch you if any of you say Wonderfall.” Mila squints her eyes at her crowd as she tunes the low E-string, considering the guitar to be in playable condition. 

“Thought it was Wonderwall?” Glenn looks at Maggie, slightly confused.  

“I’ll punch you.” Mila places her fingers on the cold steel strings and strikes a loop of chords, searching for a melody. She quickly finds the sound she’s looking for; huh, she wasn’t that rusty after all. With her tongue in between her teeth she starts playing something random.  

The sheriff's tapping boot is enough for her to pick Rick as her target. 

“Come on, I’m not doing it on my own.”

Rick takes a sip of beer, chuckles a little. But Mila’s serious. As is Michonne. 

“Do it Sheriff.” Michonne bumps Rick in the side. “We got ya’ back.”

Mila doesn’t wait for an answer. He won’t be able to resist later on. She adjusts the guitar on her leg and starts playing a tune, praying to some higher power that her voice won’t break. 

“As long as I remember, the rain's been comin' down. Clouds of mystery pourin', confusion on the ground. Good men through the ages, tryin' to find the sun. And I wonder, still I wonder, who'll stop the rain-”

She gets chills down her spine as she manages to pull the Creedence classic off pretty decently, sitting at the log between the men in her life, surrounded by her new family. Just as when she performed it at that bar with Jim that first time she performed like that in her life, a couple of years ago. She vomited into a bin before going on stage, or more like a corner with a rug of the small, crowded bar in Brooklyn, but as soon as she had the guitar in her hands and started singing, she felt calm, secure. Jim used to say it was a miracle she learned to play the guitar at the pace she did, having only played piano and the violin during her childhood. Guitars was a dumb instrument, according to her papa. Pff, what did he know? Prison was for dumb people, and look where he was? Mila lets the chord die after the last “-and I wonder, still I wonder, who'll stop the rain?”, then continues with Springsteen.  

“On a rattlesnake speedway in the Utah desert, I pick up my money and head back into town. Driving 'cross the Waynesboro county line, I got the radio on and I'm just killing time-”

She notices Daryl’s gaze in the corner of her eyes, just as she notices Juri’s nodding head and Abraham saying, mids a chuckle of delighted surprise: 

“I’ll be damn.” 

It’s like inviting all of them into a very special place of herself, a place where she can be something else than a mom, a dental nurse and a girl with a broken past. With a deep, lingering gaze, she tries to communicate that to Daryl, as a way of explaining her trust in him. To her, music is medicine for the soul and the heart. A heritage she has passed on to Juri when giving him the walkman for his birthday. 

“The dogs on Main Street howl, 'Cause they understand. If I could take one moment into my hands, mister I ain't a boy, no I'm a man. And I believe in a promised land-”

She removes her fingers from the strings and the chord echoes out into the night, blends in with the cheering. She’s warmed up now, overflown with the rush of happy adrenaline playing the guitar causes her, just as the applause makes her blush. Okay, let's go with something happy, she thinks.

“Here’s a lil' something to cheer ya’ll up.” She says in her most convincing country-voice, puts her fingers into a ‘G’ and: “Daddy won a radio and tuned it to a country show, I was rockin' in the cradle to the cryin' of a steel guitar-”

It takes Rick ten seconds to hear what song it is, he knows his country music. He jumps into the chorus, at first doubtfully, but encouraged by both Carl and Abe, who have taken out a cigar from his jacket, he seems to think ‘what the hell’, and sings a little louder, with more feeling. And it’s fun.

“Singin 'in the bars and- Chasin' that neon rainbow, livin 'that honky tonk dream.' Cause all I've ever wanted, is to pick this guitar and sing. Just tryin 'to be somebody, just wanna be heard and seen. I'm chasin 'that neon rainbow, livin' that honky tonk dream- “

He continues to sing with her as Mila follows up with the Beatles “Rocky Raccoon”, but lets her continue on her own after that, with both “Thunder road” and a country version of “I’m on fire”.

“Your accent disappears when you sing.” Maggie says as Mila takes a few sips of vodka. 

“Yeah I haven’t figured the reason for that out yet.” Mila wipes her mouth on the back of her hand as she grabs the guitar again, her fingertips pulsating from having to work the strings again. “But singing country with an accent would sound weird, I guess? Okay, one last one.” 

She ends her one woman-show, which could just as well be seen as therapy for her musically starving soul, with Kate Bush’s “Running up that hill”, as the flames from the fire licks the now pitch black sky, sprinkled with millions, billions of stars.   

“Say, if I only could, I'd be running up that hill. With no problems…”

Taglist: @lonewolf471 @twdeadfanfic

[dis-easedfairy]

Oink The Stuffed Pig

WARNINGS: Swearing | Mentions of Sex (a dirty joke or two) |

Pairings: Kim Seokjin x Single Dad!Male Reader

Genre: Parent!au, neighbor!au, some angst (just a lil), fluff, humor 

Word Count: 11,838

Summary: Due to complications, M/n moves to a new city with his son. Though struggling, the two grow to like their new lives and new neighborhood, especially Kim Seokjin, their neighbor across the hall who is more than kind. 

A/n: IM ALIVEEEE! I suck at endings so like... my bad. I tried to get this out because I know a few of you were excited for this. Turned out a little more angst than I plan but uh... surprise? Again sorry it took me so long to finish it! 💙☀

I sighed and looked out the window as the train I was in, drove down the tracks. I looked at my watch it was around 7 pm and I knew it was going to be a long night. I looked over to my son, he was happily playing a game on an old phone of mine. I let out a sigh as my eyes trailed down to look at our backpacks on the floor.

I’m sorry we have to go this far.

I leaned forward, opening the side pouch of my backpack to take out my phone. I had muted it days ago and didn’t bother to look at it.

I unlocked it and looked through my messages.

Mom: Okay, just be safe, okay? The both of you.

Dad: remember to secure the new home. it will give everyone a piece of mind

.

Unknown Number: you cant just take him! I said I wanted to work this out!

I rolled my eyes at the last one, deciding just to message my parents since we were more within the city.

M/n to Mom: I found a nice little neighborhood, close to his school and there are some good jobs I can get for the time being, just until I save up a bit. We’ll be safe. Don’t worry too much.

M/n to Dad: I had a security system kit sent with some of our stuff. I’m going to go to the store tomorrow to look for tougher screws for the doors. We have a balcony so I have to figure something out! Safety is my second priority!

“Who are you talking to?” I heard my son’s small voice ask.

I looked over to him, his eyes were big, full of curiosity as he lifted himself up in order to look at the screen. I only smiled.

“Your grandparents.” He gave me a small pout.

“Why the pout?” I asked with a sad chuckle, “…Expecting someone else?” I asked dejectedly.

I swore I saw his eyes twinkle, “Aunt Hyejin!” My heart dropped to my stomach.

I tore my eyes away from his, prepping myself to lie, “Ha… Aunt Hyejin… she…” Oh god, what would be a good lie to tell him?

I glanced back at his perfect brown orbs, stabbing into me for an answer.

“A… Aunt Hyejin is not herself right now. So… I can’t talk to her right now, okay?” I wasn’t lying, but it sure in the hell felt like I was.

I could see the sadness enter his eyes, as well as those same eyes water. My eyes widened as I quickly held my hands up as if he were now holding a weapon to me.

“But why?” He asked, his voice sounding very upset.

“Junseok-ah, it’s complicated. BUT you’re going to make new friends and have your own room!” I tried to sway my son.

“I don’t want new friends I want Aunt Hyejin!” He was now crying, I grimaced.

I looked around the empty train car almost frantically, as to search for something to get my son to stop crying. I let out a heavy sigh.

“Listen, Junseok-ah, stop crying. Some people aren’t going to be in your life for the rest of your life. Some people have their own lives to live, some care dearly about you, and some will care only for themselves. It has nothing to do with your personality or who you are as a person. Aunt Hyejin… I have a feeling she only cares for herself right now. And right now, I have to care about you, and you have to care about yourself right now too.” That probably made no sense to him.

Oddly enough my son only nodded his head, using his sleeve to wipe his tears, I offered him a small smile.

“Don’t worry, I got us a place to stay and you have your own room!” Which I have no Idea how I’m going to pay for it.

“We live near a school you’ll be going too!” Some of your new teachers think I’m irresponsible for moving so late in the year and hate me already.

“I’m getting a new job, so new cool things!” You might not get anything good for your birthday if it's a low-paying job.

“Our new home is in a nice neighborhood with lots of kids so you’ll make friends.” You’re more extroverted than me and the families will more than likely hate me.

“It’s a little far from grandpa and grandma, but this is a better life!” I’m scared.

“…Okay. Can we get something to eat before we go to our new house?” He asked softly.

I nodded, not wiping the smile off my face, “We’ll get whatever you want. Just don’t be sad or scared. Just know that I love you with all my heart. Forever.”

Junseok sniffled a bit and moved closer to wrap his arms around my neck. I wrapped my arms around him, pulling him onto my lap to keep him closer. I could feel him relax in my hold as I moved my hand to rub his back.

“We have reached Hoehyeon Station.”

“So how have you settled in?” My friend Jeongguk asked, he was the one who convinced me to move to Seoul.

I could hear my son let out a scream as he ran around with a plushie pig toy and a Spider-Man toy, a throw blanket tied around his neck as a makeshift cape. I soon then heard a bump and something clatter to the floor. I was unpacking a box on the kitchen counter, taking out glasses and plates.

I let out a heavy sigh, “As settled as we can be I gue-,”

“NO! NO! NO! NO!” I could hear my son shout, making me snap into action as I threw everything I was holding down and ran to his voice.

He was in my bedroom, the window open and him half hanging out.

“Junseok! What are you doing!?” I demanded, running over to yank him away from the open window.

“I dropped Oink! I have to get him!” My son protested as I threw him over my shoulder to stop him from squirming out my grip.

“You won’t get anything besides a trip to the hospital hanging out the window like that!” I scolded, sitting him on my bed.

I pulled back to see his tear-filled eyes. I let out a deep sigh, “If I tell a friend of mine to look after you, will you behave while I look for Oink?” I can’t believe I was going to search in an ally for a stuffed pig.

Junseok quickly nodded his head, almost desperate to get his oldest friend back.

“Fineeee.” I groaned, walking back to the kitchen to get my phone.

“I can’t believe I’m doing this,” I grumbled, moving a trash bag out the way as I tried to look for a bright pink stuffed pig.

I let out a growl of frustration, “Where are you, you little bitch?” I grumbled, trying to think of new places to look.

I looked at my watch and sighed, I was in a hoodie and jeans but it was only getting colder as the sun was no longer in the sky. It was close to 11 pm and I didn’t want to spend all night looking for a stuffed animal. My son cherished that stuffed pig since it was his first stuffed animal but was it really worth it?

Yes, it was. My son loved it so I will find it.

I groaned at myself, kicking a trash bag and going back to looking for the lost pig.

I was ready to give up thirty minutes later until I saw pink fuzz that looked familiar. I quickly moved whatever was in the way and yanked the pig up into my view.

“Fuck yesss!” I chuckled in satisfaction as I began to dust off and examine the pig.  

I frowned when I noticed how flat and lumpy it was, it was less to it being dropped out a window, and more about the years of washing, drying and laying on it.  

“Mmm, you need a good stuffing, huh?” I asked the pig, examining it more for rips or stains.

“…Uhhh…” I heard a voice draw out behind me.

I immediately spun around to face the person. A man, he was a little taller than me, wearing a white sweater, dark sweatpants, and white shoes. He had broad shoulders and had the most handsome face I’ve ever been blessed with ever seeing. His eyes were wide as he held onto a trash bag, his eyes dropped to see the flattened stuffed pig and he let out a breath of relief with a chuckle.

“I…” He let out a very unique laugh that tumbled from his rose-colored plush lips, bending over, “I thought… Oh my god…” He tried to speak but only laughter came out.

He looked fairly young but I had no idea how I was supposed to address him, “S-Sir? Is something funny?” I asked, praying he wasn’t some guy who lost his mind and planned to murder me in an ally after I spent an hour and a half looking for a stupid stuffed pig.

He held up one finger as he continued to laugh. I assumed it was to give him a minute so I did.

“You have to understand,” He began, trying to catch his breath, “I just heard your words and saw your back and nothing more!” I saw red begin to bloom in his cheeks.

I tilted my head slightly in confusion. He took my confusion as the go-ahead to explain which he only did in few words, with a smirk.

“Fuck yes? You need a good stuffing?”

It slowly clicked together as heat began to rush to my face and embarrassment washed through me.

“I-I was just talking about a stuffed animal!” I raced to explain, which only made him cackle more.

“Wait! No! I’m not fucking the stuffed animal! That sounded wrong!” The man was now leaning against the building, trying not to fall to the ground from laughing so hard.

“M-My son dropped this out the window, he can’t sleep without it.” I explained nervously.

The man straightened up, trying to gain his composure, “You’re a dad?” He asked breathlessly.

I know I’m ‘too young’.

“Yeah. He’s four… This is an awkward way to meet… We just moved in today.” I gave the man a small smile.

He looked surprised, “Really? Nice to meet you! I’m Kim Seokjin!” He introduced himself happily, moving to shake my hand.

“L/n M/n.” I informed, shaking his hand.

“Welcome to the neighborhood, hopefully, there are no more… misunderstandings.” He joked.

I felt a wave of heat travel to my face again, “I hope not.” I agreed with a nervous giggle.

Seokjin opened his mouth as if he was going to say more but as interrupted by my screeching friend.

“M/N! WHAT IS OUR SON’S FIXATION WITH THE TOILET!? HE TRIED TO FLUSH MY PHONE!” Jeongguk shouted out the window.

Well, that was a nice moment…

I let out a deep sigh, “Sorry, I have to head back up. I’ll talk to you soon, Seokjin?” I questioned.

He nodded, seeming at a lost for words. I frowned a bit. He was so open a few moments ago. I walked past him, giving him a small wave as I began to jog back into the building.

I ran to one of the two elevators and pushed my floor number. Using the time to think of what jobs I could apply to and how to make sure ‘Aunt Hyejin’ didn’t come to visit my son while he was in school.

The ding of the elevator broke me from my thoughts and I went to my apartment door. Before I could dig in my back pocket for my keys, my door flung open to reveal my friend Jeongguk.

“He keeps flushing things in the toilet. You lost a roll of toilet paper. ” My friend informed me, crossing his arms, looking upon me in judgment.

“He’s acting out because he wasn’t very excited about coming here…” I notified, rubbing the back of my neck with the hand that wasn’t gripping the stuffed animal.

Jeongguk sighed. I could hear another ‘ding’ but took it as the elevator I got off of closing it’s doors and going back down.

“I know he’ll like it here, you will too. Did…” Jeongguk looked down, biting his bottom lip as he chose his next words carefully.

“Did Hyejin know where you were going? I don’t think it’s a good idea if she knew where we live.” Jeongguk voiced apprehensively.

“Don’t worry about her. I just told her I was leaving town. She tried to tell Junseok that he could stay at her place if he didn’t want to go.” I stated bitterly.

“Are you fucking with me? She literally doesn’t quit does she!?” Jeongguk scoffed, anger beginning to radiate off of him.

I shook my head, “I was just wondering how we would get him to school without her finding him.”

Jeongguk’s eyes widened, “Do you think she’d go school hunting!?”

“I wouldn’t put it past her.” I grunted bitterly.

Jeongguk let out a frustrated sigh, leaning on the doorframe and pinching the bridge of his nose with two fingers. After a few moments, Jeongguk looked up, sadness and sympathy in his eyes. He reached out, grabbing the collar of my hoodie and pulled me into a hug. He wrapped one arm around my waist and his other hand was in the middle of my back. He let out a long exhale as he began to rub my back. I wrapped my arms around him, fully accepting the comfort in my friend’s embrace, even going as far as to bury my face in his shoulder.

“We’ll figure this out together, M/n. I’ll introduce you to some friends of mine, we’ll settle you in, get you a job and support you for as long as you need, okay?” Jeongguk promised.

I felt a weight lift off my shoulders, knowing I wouldn’t do this alone. I was prepared to do it alone, but I knew Jeongguk wouldn’t let me. He was my best friend. I really counted on him and he counted on me.

The comforting resolve was disrupted by the sound of a flushing toilet.

Jeongguk let out an irritated growl. Jeongguk yanked away to turn to look into the apartment.

“WHAT DID I SAY ABOUT THE TOILET!?” Jeon demanded, grabbing my arm and dragging me into the apartment with him.

I made a wild grab to close the door behind us, trying to fight Jeongguk’s tight grip. I pushed the door closed and Jeongguk let me go, deeming me as the reason he couldn’t move fast enough to scold my son. I only chuckled, moving to the kitchen to throw the stuffed animal in the washing machine.

“YAH! NO SON OF MINE WILL FLUSH IRON MAN DOWN THE TOILET!” I rolled my eyes at Jeongguk’s words.

I could hear my son whine a response as I set the washer to quick wash. I heard footsteps and turned to see Jeongguk holding an armful of toys.

“Uncle Gukkie!” My son whined, trailing after him.

“No! You can’t have these back until you learn how to treat them right.” Jeongguk huffed, dropping the toys in an empty box and swiftly picking it up so Junseok couldn’t snag a toy back.

“Why all his toys?” I chortled.

They both looked over at me, my son with pleading eyes and my friend with the eyes of determination.

“Because our son needs to know what ‘stop’ and ‘don’t do that’ means.” He asserted.

“Stop calling him ‘our son’, people will get the wrong idea.” I giggled, moving to get the detergent.

“No! I’m helping you raise this brat, so he’s my son too!” I shrugged my shoulders. Fair enough.

“Any ideas for dinner?” I asked, starting the washer.

“Daddd!” Junseok whined in complaint of me not defending his toys.

I just knew Jeongguk made up his mind and I mostly agreed with him.

“We’ll order take out for now. Tomorrow we’ll have a better plan, we might be a little too busy for a sit-down meal though.” Jeongguk smiled, happy I wasn’t fighting him.

I nodded in understanding, “We’ll have to get some kind of ‘we are new to the neighborhood, don’t mind the screaming’ gift.”

“I think we’ll be fi-” Junseok cut Jeongguk off by jumping up and grabbing the edge of the box.

Junseok yanked down, causing the box to rip and toys spill out.

“JUST WHO DO YOU THINK YOU ARE!? I said you don’t get these back until you learn how to treat them!!” Jeongguk began and ‘our son’ began to argue back.

“I’m thinking baked goods.” I sighed.

“Jeongguk, you…” I growled, holding one end of the entertainment center as Jeongguk held the other.

“You what!? Finish your sentence!” Jeongguk challenged, stopping in the middle of the entrance.

“You soggy piece of toast! Stop pushing me! You’re making me lose balance!” I snapped.

“You’re so fucking slow!” He clapped back.

“You’re so fucking impatient!” Thus the best friend bicker began.

Soon it wasn’t even about the stupid entertainment center, it wasn’t anything too harmful, just us venting out the stress of the day, per usual. We even set down the entertainment center to argue better.

“NO ONE EVEN LIKES THAT RAMEN SO WHY WAS THAT ONE ON SALE?”

“MAYBE BECAUSE NO ONE GOT IT SO IT WAS GOING TO EXPIRE!”

“THAT MUST HAVE BEEN IT!” After a few minutes of this, we finally drew some breath.

“Okay, now we can get back to work.” Jeongguk exhaled.

I have a quick glance around, “Uh… where is Junseok?” I asked blankly.

Jeongguk quickly spun around to face the living room, “He WAS on the couch!??”

Jeongguk and I slowly met eyes as the realization dawned on us. My best friend and I jumped into action.

“CALL THE POLICE!” Jeongguk shouted as he ran at the door.

As soon as the door opened I could see the door across the hall slightly ajar. This led me to think that my son got curious as to what the door was because he’s never lived in an apartment before.

I tried to grab onto my best friend’s shirt to stop him but he was already out the door and down the hall to the stairs before I could say anything. I heard him shove the door open to the stairway and take off. I sighed, wishing he would’ve saved me the effort of having to call him.

I hesitantly closed my apartment door and made my way to the door across the hall. I lightly pushed open the door, caution pulsing through my veins. I could hear bad playing of a guitar flood the nice-lit, comfy apartment.

“Don’t go too hard on the strings or they will break.” I heard a familiar male voice softly instruct.

The air smelled like muffins and I could hear the sound of a tv. I entered the apartment as quiet as I could, taking off my shoes and taking a deep breath. I raised my hand up and tapped my knuckles on the wall beside me.

“Come in!” A cheerful voice chimed, making the place seem even more inviting.

I stepped forward out the entryway to round the corner. My son was sitting on the floor, holding a guitar WAY too big for his body. His tongue was sticking out, his eyebrows furrowed as he tried to focus on the cords he was strumming.

The man I met in the ally, Seokjin, was sitting on the chair with the stuffed pig on his lap. The pig was plushier than before. I assumed Seokjin restuffed the animal since he had a sewing needle in hand, mid-tug of the thread. Seokjin’s eyes seemed to widen at my arrival.

“I’m sorry if he interrupted your afternoon. He was on the couch one moment then he was gone the next.” I apologized, bowing my head in remorse.

“That’s okay! He hasn’t caused me any trouble.” Seokjin assured me.

I lifted my head up, “Really!? He’s been bratty since we arrived.” I was dismayed. My son listened to a complete stranger more than me!?

Seokjin’s plush lips pulled into a smile, “Yes. Your son has been well behaved!” Seokjin grabbed the scissors and snipped off the extra thread from the pig. Seokjin stood up, a new aura around him that was ignored by my son as Seokjin seemed to strut up to me.

“If you feel that bad about interrupting my afternoon, you can treat me to a better one this week?” Seokjin implied, his eyes whirling with confidence.

I almost choked on air. Did my attractive neighbor just ask me out?

“I… Well…” I was at a loss for words.

Seokjin’s small smile turned into a bigger one, almost cocky, “How about tomorrow? Here. At six.” He tempted, one of his hands moving up to fix my shirt. I’m pretty sure he could feel my heart going faster than it’s ever gone before.

Seokjin’s eyes playfully cast up, awaiting my response.

“So what did you tell him?” Jeongguk asked, getting himself a glass of lemonade and leaning against the kitchen island I was currently sitting at. Head in my hands as my body burned with humiliation. Junseok was on the couch, too emersed in his game to understand how badly I ruined myself.

“I shouted ‘I’m gay’ and ran out.” I grumbled.

Lemonade shot out from Jeongguk’s nose, spraying out onto the countertop. My eyes widened and I jumped up to get him some paper towels, grabbing a few myself to catch the liquid that threatened to ruin the floor. Jeongguk grabbed the paper towels and held them up to his face as he began to cough and sputter. I swore I heard slight chuckling in the distress.

“I-I don’t… I don’t think that line works in THIS scenario…” Jeongguk coughed as he moved his cup to the sink, having no desire to have lemonade again any time soon.

“I panicked!” I tried to defend myself.

“Do you want to go on a date with him?” He inquired.

I threw my hands up, “I don’t know! I hardly even know the guy!”

My best friend rolled his eyes, “Well, you won’t know him anytime soon with you shouting ‘I’m gay’ while running out his apartment like he was asking you if you knew his lord and savior Jesus Christ.” Jeongguk smirked.

“I didn’t say ‘I’m gay’ while running out! I said it then ran out. Get your shit straight, Jeon.” I dropped back down to my seat with a pout. I leaned forward, dropping my head so my face was against the cold countertop, groaning in defeat and embarrassment.

“Okay, I’m sorry.” Jeon tried to refrain from smiling, but was failing horribly, “I shouldn’t tease you about this. Maybe go over, see if the offer stands and if he was serious. He came on a little strong. You never know, he might be as freaked out as you.”

My head lifted up and my eyes filled with hope. “Will it be that easy? You think so?” I asked in ease.

“No. He definitely thinks you’re weird and probably has another date set up in your spot. When you get there tomorrow, you’ll be interrupting his date.”

There were a few moments of silence as my expression fell and his lifted.

“I hope that lemonade burned your nose.” I muttered, laying my head back on the island.

"But Uncle Jeonnnn." My son whined from the kitchen island the next day, after a busy morning.

"No. I said we'd get ice cream AFTER you put away all your toys." Jeongguk asserted, lightly kicking the large box of toys that had been taped up from being ripped.

I only shook my head as I loaded the fridge with groceries.

"But I already cleaned my room, helped dad in the kitchen and helped you!" My son bargained.

"He has been helping a lot today, Jeon," I informed with a small smile.

Jeongguk's head snapped to face me, betrayal written in his eyes, "Who's side are you on!?"

I let out a sigh. I had two toddlers now.

"I'm not picking a side. Junseok, he said after you put your toys away. But Jeongguk, you can't discredit the work he's put in today without being a brat or complaining once. " I resolved.

My best friend pouted, deep in thought. He then turned to my son.

"How about we get junk food and play video games for an hour as your reward?" Jeon suggested, making my son's eyes light up.

"Good, because I don't want to go back on my word. You only get ice cream when you put away your toys. Go get ready." Jeon chuckled.

My son jumped up and rushed to his room quickly as if Jeon would change his mind in under thirty seconds. Jeongguk stood next to me to open the fridge for a bottle of soda.

"Are you sure you're okay with this? I know you said you wanted to help, but I don't want you to be doing all this because you feel obligated to." I frowned.

Jeongguk raised his eyebrow and swallowed, "M/n? I'm only taking him to the convenience store and back?"

"That's not it, " I rolled my eyes, "You've helped me mostly unpack, arrange the apartment and even took a week off from work to get us settled in. You've given a lot in the past few days."

It was then my best friend's turn to roll his eyes, "Seriously? Friends help friends move. And BEST friends arrange your fucking apartment for you because you don't have your shit together. If I didn't want to be here I wouldn't show up. You and your son deserve some happiness right now, so if I have to call another customer service line to help me set up a shelf, I fucking will."

I smiled at how much determination filled his eyes. "You didn't have the right tool, like a dumbass," I recalled, trying not to cackle.

"The manual said I didn't need a hammer!" He snapped.

"Your voice got a little offended there. Did I hit a nerve?" I teased.

"Know what? Fuck you, " Jeongguk stated dramatically as he put down his soda and began to stride out the kitchen, "I'm leaving you! I'm going to stay with my parents and I'm taking our son with me!" He ranted as he walked into the hall.

I chuckled, shaking my head as I moved back to stock up the kitchen. After I loaded the pantry I looked around for the box with the plates. I walked more into the living room to examine the stacked boxes by the door but didn't find any more boxes for the kitchen. I frowned.

"Hey, Jeongguk?" I called rotating boxes, hoping I read them wrong.

"Yes?" He called back from my room.

"Do you know where the last box for the kitchen is?"

"Check the hall! There are a few boxes out there that just got delivered!" In the hall!?

I shook my head in judgment and walked to the front door and out into the hall. Sure enough, to the left of my door were two stacks of boxes, four boxes high. I jogged back into the apartment to get my box cutter off the kitchen counter and ran back out to get to work on opening the last kitchen box that conveniently sat on the top of the first stack.

After I cut the tape open, I retract the blade in the box cutter and shoved it in my front hoodie pocket for easy access. I opened the box and took out a plate to examine it for any damages.

I could hear Jeongguk and my son talking as they entered the living room, then the entryway to pull on their shoes.

"Off to get junk?" I asked, checking other plates.

"Yes! He even dressed himself." My eyes widened at my best friend's words, making me spin around to face my mismatched son.

He had on red pants, a white T-shirt, green converse, a pink hat, and a yellow zip-up hoodie.

"...Junseok...Why?" I wasn't disappointed or judging, just confused.

Junseok shrugged, "It's comfortable."

"I mean, at least that's what matters." I gave him a warm smile.

Jeongguk reached in his back pocket, "He's adorable, I should take a picture." Jeon froze.

"Fuck! I forgot my phone. Wait here, Seok." Jeon gave my son two quick pats on the head and dashed inside.

My son and I gave each other and look then shifted our gazes to the apartment to give my best friend a judgemental look he couldn't see. Once Jeongguk came back, he took my son's hand and gave us both a big bunny smile.

"We're off!" He announced, puffing out his chest.

"To see the wizard?" I teased.

"Off what?" My son questioned.

Jeongguk deflated, "Let's just go." He grumbled as I held back a chuckle.

"Bye, Dad!" Junseok happily waved and began to drag my best friend down the hall.

"I'll grab you the usual!" Jeon quickly told me as my son dragged him to the elevators.

I giggled, shaking my head. I turned back to the boxes and lifted up the kitchen one. I took the box into the kitchen, setting it down on the island and made my way back out to the hall. I grabbed the top box on the second stack, turning it to get a better look at what I had written on the side of it.

As I was checking I could hear footsteps behind me. I smirked, figuring it was my friend forgetting something, "Forgot your wallet now, Jeon?" I teased, turning around.

I was met with someone who wasn't Jeongguk.

Seokjin was looking down at the floor. It looked like he had been biting at his lips and his hands were shoved in his pocket.

"Hello, M/n..." His voice was awkward and I didn't expect it from the man who was so confident and straightforward yesterday.

"Seokjin! Hi! How is your day so far?" I asked just as awkwardly.

There were a few moments of uncomfortable silence. Seokjin let out a groan of frustration as he pulled his hands out his pockets and lifted his gaze.

"I wanted to apologize!" He stated, his chest seeming to puff up.

I pressed my lips together in an effort to not smile, "Apologize for what?"

"I came on too strong yesterday." -Seokjin looked down at the floor again- "You had barely met me and I thought if I made an impression, you'd be as interested as me. I talked to my friend about it and he called me a dumbass. I understand why though. You and your boyfriend seem to be happy together and have a son an-" I raised one finger up as I let out a small giggle of disbelief.

I knew it was rude to interrupt but I just had to.

"Y-You... You think Jeongguk and I are boyfriends?" I held back laughter.

His eyes widened slightly, seeming even more embarrassed, "Are you not??"

"Jeongguk is my best friend, he has a habit of calling my son 'our son' because he's been around him since birth and helped me a lot with raising him. I feel nothing but platonic feelings for Jeongguk and he feels the same. We're like brothers." I explained, a smile on my face.

So Seokjin was a softie. I should've guessed.

"I... I could've sworn... Well, that makes sense!" Seokjin threw his hands up and groaned, turning around so his back was to me and put his face in his hands.

"Seokjin? If the offer still stands I would love to go on a date with you. I just don't know if I can do it tonight." I smirked, feeling bolder now that I knew he was as awkward as me.

"I'll admit you DID make an impression. You made me so flustered I told you I was gay and ran." I added light-heartedly.

I heard Seokjin let out a small laugh and saw his shoulders shake a bit.

I pressed my lips together, thinking of how to make this situation less awkward.

“Would you like to have a drink with me? I’m kinda tired and need a break.” I smiled.

Seokjin nodded, only moving when I began to walk into my apartment.

“Woww!” He exclaimed in awe.

“What is it?” I asked, spinning around, full of fear.

“Your apartment looks so clean!” I let out a breath of relief.

I thought he found something bad. Like my son leaving a half-eaten sandwich on the floor or even Jeongguk forgetting my underwear on the couch because he insisted that he do laundry today.

Glad it wasn’t anything bad, I strolled to the kitchen to serve us glasses of lemonade. Seokjin looked around a bit before making his way into the kitchen.

“So, who’s your friend with the blunt advice?” I giggled, lifting my glass to my lips.

Seokjin smiled, “Yoongi. He goes back and forth between staying at my apartment and our friend Hoseok’s apartment. The day I did that was the day he was at Hoseok’s. He said I was like a toddler who he couldn’t leave alone.”

“Jeongguk says the same thing. He teased me endlessly for what I did,” I chuckled.

“Well, now we’re having a conversation like adults.”

“More like teenagers, because we’re having lemonade awkwardly.”

“Adults awkwardly drink lemonade too!” I laughed, only shaking my head.

“How old are you anyway? I want to say you’re my hyung, but the way you act contradicts that.” Seokjin pressed his hand to his chest in fake offense.

“I’m 26!”  

“So you’re a goofy hyung.”

“And you’re a rude dongsaeng!” Now it was my turn to be offended.

“How so!?”

“You should’ve asked my age when we met!”

“Well, I’m sorry I was distracted!”

“I know I’m handsome but please have manners!” My face pretty much heated up the whole room.

“It’s because Jeongguk shouted out the window! Then the second time you cornered me!” I defended my honor as best as I could.

“Ahh, I knew my handsome face affected you.” He smiled playfully, shifting his hand to blow me a kiss.

“…I will kick you out of my apartment.”

Seokjin let out a laugh, “Why?”

“Because you’re backing me into a corner!”

“If it makes you feel any better, I think you’re handsome too.”

“…Where is Yoongi-hyung when you need him.”

“Yah! Why do you automatically call him hyung and not me!?”

“Because I learned my lesson!”

“Why didn’t you learn it before me!?”

“…I’m sorry, Hyung. I’ll do better next time.”

Seokjin smiled bigger, “Ah,” He clutched his chest, his face scrunching a bit like he was touched and proud, “what a respectful young man I’m raising you to be.”

“…I’m kicking you out.”

Over the next few days, Seokjin and I would wave to each other and sometimes he would knock at my door just to hang out. Jeongguk and Junseok seemed to really like him. It wasn’t long before I gave him my number so he could just text me when he would come over so I could just leave the door unlocked and so we could talk more.

If he wasn’t complimenting himself or me over text he would be giving me horribly good dad jokes.

I settled in easily and got a job working at Jeongguk’s ‘assistant’ since he worked as a camera operator. I was supposed to be as qualified as him, but what ends up happening is him teaching me how to work the camera and then him judging me when I fuck up. I am getting better, and I’m happy to have my best friend working with me.

After work is usually when Seokjin invites himself over. Since Jungkook and I are mostly attached to the hip, we pick up Junseok and all go home to my apartment together, so we make a ton of noise.

I needed to clean my apartment and go shopping one day, so Seokjin agreed to watch Junseok. I thought he would mind at first but he said he ‘would be honored to teach this young man his ways’ if I just promised that I would feed him dinner too… I wasn’t sure if I should’ve left him with Seokjin…

I had Seokjin stay at my now clean apartment while he watched Junseok since it would be easier. It was just Seokjin and Junseok since Jungkook had to go back to his own apartment to clean up.

I looked at the two bags of chips, one was ‘original’, meaning salt and a ton of grease and other one was octopus flavored. Since I haven’t tried the octopus flavored chip, I figured ‘what the hell’ and dropped them both in my basket.

“Old habits never die huh?” I heard making me freeze.

Please don’t be her.

I spun around and felt my blood boil, “Hyejin, what the actual fuck are you doing here?”

She gave me an awkward smile, “It’s nice to see you too.”

“Drop the crap, what do you want.”

“You just leaving was cruel. He’s my son too.” I narrowed my eyes at her, fighting every urge not to explode in a semi-busy store.

“You wanted nothing to do with him because it inconvenienced your ‘perfect life’. So you can fuck off with that. You literally delivered him, then handed him to me and never even visited until a few months ago. ”

“Because I regretted my decision.”

“Because the party was over. The people who ‘knew you better than me’ decided you were expendable.”

She sighed, “Stop being so mean!”

“Stop pretending like you came to this decision yourself and like you actually give a fuck.”

“What makes you think that I don’t!?”

“What’s the name of Junseok’s pig?”

There was silence. I sighed at her look of panic. Maybe I was too harsh, but I didn’t want MY son to be hurt by an unreliable person who only cared about themselves.

“Listen,” I began, looking down at my hands, trying to think over my words, “We used to have something and I didn’t plan on having a son so soon. You basically took matters into your own hands and forced this on the both of us. You had him, then handed him to me and never even looked his direction. I moved here to start over with him. So he wouldn’t hear stories of his mother at least for now. You left us both. You can see where I’m coming from can’t you?”

I looked up at the end of my rant to see her fuming.

I guess she couldn’t see where I was coming from.

“You can’t just pick up and start over without me! I’m his mother!”

“A mother doesn’t give her child up for partying and people who don’t care about anyone or anything.”

“Stop bringing my friends into this! It’s YOUR fault!”

I let out an annoyed sigh. This was going nowhere.

“You’re obviously not mature yet. Please leave me and MY son alone. I would consider you visiting my son if you grew up a little bit because you obviously haven’t learned anything. He starts school soon, and if I see or hear of you stalking him there or waiting at the fucking gates, so help me I will get every lawyer I can get my hands on to MAKE you stay away. So I’m politely telling you to go fuck yourself.” I grabbed another bag of chips and began to push past her.

“You can’t take my son from me!” She yelled as I walked away.

“I didn’t! You handed him over!” I called back, trying to walk away in fucking style.

I couldn’t stop thinking about Hyejin on the elevator ride up to my apartment.

Maybe I WAS too harsh.

Or maybe she was too stubborn to take a fucking hint.

I kept wondering if there was a compromise we could come to or if something was wrong with my logic.

I was afraid she’d get bored like before then leave again. Play nice for a few weeks then leave.

I didn’t want someone like that in my son’s life but she was right, she was his mother and she had rights.

What if I DID have to involve the law?

What if they decided that I shouldn’t get my son?

What if it all went downhill because I was too stubborn to just let her see him??

What if I DID let her see him and she took him from me??

I was so stuck in my thoughts that I didn’t notice that I got out the elevator and shoved open my front door.

I didn’t snap out of it until I heard a male scream. My head snapped up to see Seokjin leap from the couch and frantically look around for something to defend himself. After finding nothing he, for some reason, settled on Oink who was laying on the couch, cocking his arm back like he was going to throw it at me.

"Whoa, whoa, whoa it's just me!" I held my hands up in front of me- "Put. The. Pig. Down!"

"You don't just walk into a man's home!" Seokjin scolded, shaking the pink stuffed pig at me in a demonstration of dominance.

“It’s MY apartment!”

“It was MY territory before you entered!”

“Like hell it is! I pay the bills!”

“I babysit and grace this place with my looks! Now tell me who REALLY provides for this family!”

As much as I tried to fight it, that made me smile. Despite me being too stressed and worked up to focus when I walked in, Seokjin made it all melt away in a matter of moments.

It was like 10 tons was lifted from my shoulders.

I sighed, letting my body relax, “You, Seokjin.” I smiled tiredly as I walked over to him.

He looked a little shocked at my words, still holding his guard up as I threw my arms around him to pull him into a thankful hug.

“You provide for this family more than you know.” I spoke, letting the silence hang in the air.

Then too much silence. It was only a few seconds of silence but it seemed like minutes. I was considering apologizing and pulling away, but I felt Jin wrap his arms around my waist and pull me closer.

It was now peaceful, comfortable, and reassuring silence.

It wasn’t like a hug with Jeongukk. Though it was filled with love and comfort, it felt like that but so much more.

I could feel my emotions pool in my chest and threaten to spill out. All from a simple hug.

“…I’m lost.” I admitted, hiding my face into his well-built shoulder.

Seokjin let out a small sigh, his arms tightening around me, “I’ll always be here to guide you.” He seemed to promise in a soft tone.

Maybe I could be willing to let Seokjin into my life more than I already had.

It really wouldn’t be so bad to let Seokjin be the person he wanted to be to me… Would it?

“So…about that date.” I began.

“Remember not to put the glass pitcher in the front of the fridge!” I called to Jeongguk as he was sat on the floor with my son.

I could hear their loud game continue, letting me know that they were far from listening. Their bowls of noodles sat behind them on the coffee table, untouched as they numbed themselves to the gaming world,

“Yah! Eat your food!” I snapped, making Jeongguk roll his eyes with an annoyed groan.

“Fine, MOM. We’ll eat.” He sassed, tapping my son’s side to get him to turn to the table.

I could hear a soft knock on the door that made me rush over to it. I pulled open my door, ready to tell Jin to just come in because I needed to wait for my socks to get out the drawer but my jaw dropped at the sight of him.

Black leather jacket, black shirt, dark jeans, and dark boots. A beautiful earring dangled from one of his ears, giving just the right amount of flash to draw attention.

I couldn’t help but stare in awe of the man I happened to snatch up by chance. I was taken by surprise by the outfit. He usually went for a more softer look. So my dumbass was wearing an oversized sweater and jeans to match his soft look but now that wasn’t happening.

Seokjin began to smirk at my obvious staring but just like that, it was over. The moment ruined with a noodle flying across the room, sauce splattering a bit on his face and my son cackling like the tyrant he was growing up to be.

My eyes widened and I quickly ran to get paper towels as Jeongguk began to scold my son about wasting noodles.

I made a mental note to scold my son for not only wasting noodles but ruining a perfectly good leather jacket.

“Sorry, Hyung! I should’ve warned you not to wear anything nice.” I let out a small awkward laugh.

“After all I’ve done to save Oink and THIS is how I’m treated!?” Seokjin mocked offense, a smile blessing his face, making me let out a breath of relief.

Seokjin the ran over to my son to ‘tackle’ him to the floor and wiggle his finger’s against my son’s side, causing my son to squeal with laughter. Jeongguk quickly picked a side as he jumped on Seokjin’s back to annoy him, causing Seokjin to yell at Jeongguk, but not causing him to stop tickling my son.

I smiled as warmth spread throughout my chest. Despite Seokjin’s attire, he was too soft for his own good and I loved that about him. He didn’t prod at my personal life, he didn’t push his boundaries, or judge how young I was with a son. Or even judge my relationship with Jeongguk. He just took it as it was and didn’t try to change it, he just wanted to be involved. He wanted to know me. He wanted to be a part of my life and take care of us.

“Yah! You’re ruining my date!” I complained, causing Jeongguk to blow into Seokjin’s ear as a form of rebellion.

“Stop giving foreplay!” I snapped at Jeongguk, causing his eyes to widen and for him to freeze in place.

Seokjin used Jeongguk’s pause to his advantage, grabbing Jeongguk to have him on his back so Seokjin could tickle him relentlessly too. Jeongguk let out a loud laugh as he tried to squirm out of Seokjin’s grasp.

“M/N! GET YOUR BOYFRIEND!”

“I don’t know, man. The way you were teasing him makes me think he’s YOUR boyfriend…”

“LESS SHIT TALK, MORE HELP!”

The date was not what I expected, but in a good way. Seokjin said he had a reservation somewhere and I thought it was a restaurant but after a few minutes of walking, he bought two bags of chips and some drinks as we casually strolled, which was gradually making my sanity decrease.

“So… Is this the date?” I asked as Seokjin’s eyes were trained on looking in his bag for the perfect chip.

“Would it be terrible if it was?” He asked, not bothering to look up.

“Not really, I just don’t really understand why we took an hour train ride to walk around.”

Seokjin only smirked. A moment of silence.

“So what do you think of koalas?” He tested.

“WHAT ARE YOU PLANNING!?”

Seokjin let out a laugh and kept walking. I glared at the back of his head, wondering if it would be too cruel to trip him.

Words can never explain how much I felt like a child as I hastily pulled off my shoes and put them away. I practically vibrated with excitement as Seokjin led me into the empty place.

A trampoline park.

No one else but us and staff.  

I was frozen in place, taken by surprise at just how huge this place was, “How did you manage to do this!? Are you rich or something!?” I gasped, “Am I your sugar baby now?” I asked as Seokjin un-glued me from my spot by pulling me by the hand.

“As much as I want you to think I’m perfect, my friend Taehyung works here. He offered the night to us.” He explained, stepping on the boarders of the trampolines on the floor so he could walk easily.

“…Are all your friends cool?” I asked, causing Seokjin to stop in his tracks and whip his head around to face me.

“Yah! Why do you want to know? I’m the coolest out of them! I’m the only 10!” I pressed my lips together in attempts to not burst out laughing.

Seokjin shook his head, “Let’s play a game! There are a few balls around, I go on one side and you go on the other, it hits the wall behind me, you get a point, I hit it behind you, you get a point.”

I could feel my competitive spirit spur in my chest, “Oh you’re fucking on!” I smirked, playfully pushing him to the side and rushing to get to the other side of the room.

“WHY DID YOU PUSH ME!?”

“PLAY THE GAME HYUNG!”

Seokjin decided to set a timer, 20 minutes, whoever got the most points in those 20 minutes was the winner. The loser had to buy dinner and the tickets back home. A few minutes into the game and I was only pulling 2 points ahead.

Seokjin was more athletic then I gave him credit for. Soon it got way too hot in the sweater I decided to wear. I was so used to playing these kinds of games with Jeongguk that I didn’t question it when I yanked off my sweater and threw it to the side to quickly get back into the game before Seokjin attempted to score.

However, that didn’t happen. Seokjin was walking with the ball, eyes too focused on me to the point where he stepped wrong between two trampolines, causing him to slip and the brightly colored borders to go directly into his groin. My hand flew up to my mouth as I heard the wind get knocked out of him painfully. I could feel second-hand pain in my stomach as he fell to the side, his hands cupping the now extremely sensitive area, his eyes watered.

“Holy shit! Hyung!? Are you okay!?” I asked, trying to run over but ended up losing my balance. Which ended in me doing a useless belly flop in his direction.

Seokjin let out a pain-filled chuckle, “Stop being cute I’m dying!”

“I’m sorry, Hyung!” I apologized quickly, getting up as fast as I could and stepping on the border so I wouldn’t lose balance again.

Before I could race to him Seokjin’s words stopped me, “YAH! Put on your shirt first!!”

I nodded rapidly and rushed over to grab my sweater, yanking it on and turning to sprint to Jin. Which made my impatient ass slip.

Again.

I let out a frustrated groan as I belly-flopped again.

“Oh just fucking forget it!” Seokjin murmured breathlessly, rolling onto his back.  

“How about I just walk?” I suggested.

“That would be best considering this place is a death trap.”

I stood again, moving to walk carefully on the borders until I got to Seokjin. I kneeled down beside him, petting his head in attempts to comfort him.

“…Thank you.” He muttered, staring at the ceiling, looking like he was questioning every choice he’s ever made.

“…This means I win right?”

“Gloat all you want but I’m never bringing you here ever again and I’m telling Taehyung that he tried to kill me.”

“…No one had you staring.” I tried to hold back the laughter that was bubbling in my chest.

“SO NOW IT’S MY FAULT THAT YOU GOT NAKED IN FRONT OF ME!?” Seokjin suddenly popped off.

“I just took off my shirt. It was too hot.” I defended.

“TOO HOT IS RIGHT! YOU CHEATED! YOU KNEW THAT WOULD MAKE ME FLUSTERED! I WANT A REMATCH WHEN I CAN FEEL MY LEFT LEG AGAIN!” Seokjin ranted.

I giggled, “Hyung, just admit that you like my body and you lost.”

“I didn’t lose! You cheated! How would you feel if I took off my shirt during a game?”

“I would like it very much.” I teased.

I could see color bloom in Seokjin’s cheeks and ears.

I could feel adoration fill my chest, “You’re so cute.”

“I’m a 26-year-old man. I’m not cute.”

“If I get you dinner can I call you cute?”

“You get me dinner and I charge you for getting to have a meal with me.”

“You called me cute, this isn’t fair.”

“Don’t talk back to your hyung.”

“…My hyung just broke his balls…”

“And it demands respect!”

I half expected Seokjin to take me to a cafe or something, but instead, he was arguing on the phone as I‌ grabbed chips out of a vending machine.

“I set up that reservation three hours ago!”‌ My eyebrows shot up.

“How the fuck did you even do that in the first place??”‌ Seokjin pressed his hand to the phone as if to completely keep the person on the other line from hearing.

“Someone canceled and I booked it.”‌ He responded in a hushed tone.

The other person seemed to say something because Seokjin quickly removed his hand and snapped, “They DID cancel!”‌

I only shook my head as I looked around. There were a few small restaurants. One looked like it had some good looking noodles. Another one had shrimp wrapped in something that I first thought was noodles. It was more like a batter of sorts, it was all dipped in the deep fryer. I was more curious about what the hell that dough was than hungry for it.

I‌ did see one stall that stood out though. An older woman was making knife-cut noodles. She didn’t have many people since there was a constant battle of everyone one-upping each other.

I turned to Seokjin, who was still arguing with this person who wasn’t budging. I grabbed his hand and began to pull him towards the stall. He was too focused on bickering that he just let me drag him along. I pushed down on his shoulders to make him sit then turned to the surprised woman.

“Two bowls please!”‌ I‌ eagerly asked.

“Would you like chicken or pork in your bowl?”‌ She asked, mirroring my smile.

I frowned a bit looking over at Seokjin, still arguing. I wasn’t really sure what he would prefer.

“One bowl of each? He’s a little stubborn.”‌ I chuckled awkwardly.

She only nodded in understanding as she began to cook the noodles. I was excited, getting chopsticks and looking over the add-in options.

“Hyung, she has soybean paste!”‌ I exclaimed.

I didn’t hear a break in his stupid dispute.

“WHY TELL ME THERE WAS A CANCELLATION IF THERE WASNT!? THEY CALLED TO CANCEL THEY CAN'T JUST TAKE IT BACK!”

I let out a huff. Well at least I know he’s passionate about what he believes in.

I reached up and grabbed his phone, ignoring his appalled face as I ended the call.

“Yah!‌ I was winning! That was rude!” He scolded me.

“You weren’t winning!‌ You were arguing with a wall! Pay attention to me.”‌ I grumbled, moving to shove his phone in my pocket.

“Hey! Give me my phone!”‌ He tried to lunge for it but I held my arm out to just keep it out his reach.

“We came out to have a nice time!”‌ I whined.

“We are having a nice time!”‌

“You arguing about a table is not a nice time!”‌

Seokjin was about to retaliate but was cut off by the woman setting the bowls in front of us.

“Thank you!”‌ I smiled at her, successfully pocketing the phone.

“Pork or chicken?”‌ I asked, handing him chopsticks.

Seokjin wordlessly grabbed the chopsticks from me and slid the bowl with chicken closer to himself. A pout rested on his rose lips.

I‌ groaned, “Hyung, the reservation wasn’t THAT important to argue for twenty minutes.”‌

More silence.

I let out a sigh and pulled the pork bowl closer, mixing the noodles and beginning to eat. I looked over to the add-in options and got the hot pepper paste. I put a decent sized dab in my bowl and offered it to Seokjin, who just took it in more muteness. I only rolled my eyes and went back to eating. Who knew an argument could mean so much to him.

After about half a bowl of noodles, he finally spoke.

“I‌ wanted tonight to be perfect.”‌

I raised an eyebrow at him. He was only staring at his noodles in defeat.

“And it is so far… except for you arguing for twenty minutes then ignoring me for ten.”

Seokjin turned to me, sadness in his eyes, “But you finally said yes!‌”

His words slowly sunk in as he continued, “I didn’t get a lot of time to set this up, but I still wanted to blow you away.”‌ Oh great now I felt like a dick for not planning the date at a later time.

“I said yes because I wanted to know you more, not what you could offer me. I understand you want it to be perfect but I honestly feel more comfortable eating noodles at a stall than in a fancy restaurant that I have to get glares every time I laugh too loud. This IS perfect, Hyung.”‌

Seokjin looked back down at his bowl, “…If I would’ve known you were this cheap I would’ve had a picnic at the park.”‌ He grumbled.

“CAN WE!?”‌

Seokjin shook his head at me, a disapproving look on his face.

"I make a KILLER lemonade!"‌ I added with a proud smile.

I‌ saw Seokjin try to hold back a smile, "We'll have a picnic date next time."‌ He confirmed, lifting up a bundle of noodles.

We heard a clatter to the side of us. We whipped our heads to look towards the woman. She had dropped a spoon and looked a little... surprised?

"Ma'am, are you okay?"‌ I asked softly.

Seokjin only frowned, "Yes, we're on a date. I've even seen him without a shirt and I liked it."‌

My head snapped over to look at Seokjin, "Hyung!"

"We're planning on going home together,"‌ Seokjin added to my horror.

"OKAY!THANKYOUSOMUCHFORTHEMEALWE'REGOINGTOGONOW!" I yelled in one breath, frantically trying to pull my wallet out of my pocket.

"He even has a son so we don't need to adopt. We're going to raise a CHILD. TWO MEN."

"HYUNGSTOPTALKING!" I slammed the money on the table, just knowing I gave more money than was needed.

My face was way too hot and my brain was far too scattered to deal with what Seokjin just did.

I grabbed his hand and began to try to yank him away. It was useless. The man didn't budge.

"I'm going to use the belt tonight because he made me lose an argument."‌

World.

Just open up and take me now.

It wasn't just the woman who was staring now, it was others around the small market as well. I‌ wanted to melt into the floor.

“Hyung…”‌I‌ whispered, “If we leave now I’ll buy you cake.”

The ride and stroll home was by far my favorite part of the date. Even though I had to buy Seokjin a pretty expensive slice of cake –I’ve never seen someone shove a whole slice of strawberry cake in their mouth– we still talked the whole way home. Embarrassing stories of our childhoods, who our friends were and everything in between. It was amazing until the dreaded topic was brought up.

“What about Junseok? Does he talk to his mother?”‌

Fuck.

I looked down at my feet as we walked, thinking over my works. I tried to figure out how I was going to tell this story without being biased or have Seokjin thing badly of Hyejin.

Seokjin must have thought I didn’t want to tell him, “You don’t have to tell me if it’s too sore of a subject…”‌ He added, a little disappointed.

“It’s not that!”‌ I‌ quickly said, looking up as fast as I spoke.

I let out an awkward laugh from my outburst, “It’s just that I‌ don’t know how to really tell the story in a neutral or fair way. I only know one side of the story so it’s a little complicated.”‌

Seokjin let out a sigh. He reached over to grab my hand and dragged me over to some stairs close by. He sat down and patted beside him, “This sounds like it will take a while, so start from the beginning. We have the time.”‌

I looked down at him, shaking my head, “You just want to torture my best friend.”‌

“Looking after that well-behaved, future child of mine, is not torture.”‌ I raised an eyebrow.

“Future child of yours?”‌

“Just sit down and spill.”‌

I sighed, and plopped down next to him, this was going to be hard explaining this to someone who didn’t know Hyejin.

“I used to have two best friends. Jeongguk, and Hyejin. Hyejin was a girl and she kinda stuck around us,” I‌ began, trying to keep my eyes dead ahead so I wouldn’t have to look into his eyes. I‌ was almost afraid he would judge me.

“Jeongguk was in sports and had two other friends, Jimin and Taehyung. So sometimes Jeongguk and I couldn’t hang out. I‌ wasn’t mad about it, I mean I‌ didn’t expect him to not have other friends. But Hyejin made it seem like it was like he committed treason,”‌ I‌ scoffed at the ridiculousness, “She kept saying ‘if he’s having fun so should we’.”‌ I‌ mocked her stupid voice.

I could see Seokjin press his lips together to hold back laughter. I‌ sighed and began to rub my hands on my thighs nervously.

“I‌ was an art student. I‌ was trying to keep my grades above average and I didn’t care about having fun. But Hyejin kept going on and on and I knew that she wouldn’t stop until I gave in and went with her at least once. So I did. ” I‌ could feel my heart speed up at the thought of finishing the stupid story that seemed to affect me years later.

“Jimin had told me once that Hyejin was giving me heart eyes. I‌ told him she was our childhood friend, so he was wrong. Jeongguk and I talked about how she seemed to be the most unconvinced when I‌ came out, but I was too idiotic to think she would just let it go.”‌ I could feel anger begin to build and sting the back of my eyes.

“So sure enough, I‌ got black-out drunk and wandered upstairs. I just wanted to pass out and have someone drag me home in the morning. I‌ remember diving onto the bed and texting Jeongguk. I‌ remember Hyejin coming into the room and asking if I was plastered. I‌ remember saying something stupid like ‘I’m not plaster, I’m a person.’. I‌ remember her flipping me over and complaining about taking me home. I just remember her hovering over me. I‌ thought she was just going to complain more and take me home like a decent fucking human being would.”‌I nearly growled.

Seokjin scooted closer to me, wrapping his arm around my shoulders. He pulled me close but said nothing, allowing me to continue.

“The last thing I‌ remember was her stupid fucking face hovering over me. I‌ woke up next to her. Being the idiot I was, I‌ woke her up and told her we would keep it a secret. I‌ dumbly thought she was as wasted as me and we just happened to hook up. We didn’t talk about it and I told her that if she brought it up, we wouldn’t be friends anymore.”‌ Even the summarized version made my blood boil.

“A few weeks later, she called in sick to school. When Jeongguk and I called in to check up on her, we were yelled at by her mom. Well… I‌ was yelled at by her mom. I‌ was called a low-life player and a bunch of other stupid shit. When I asked her what the hell her problem was, she told me Hyejin was pregnant.”‌

“I had to explain to Jeongguk what happened. Of course, Jeongguk was pissed. My family wasn’t very stable financially. But Hyejin’s family was. I had to explain to my parents. They weren’t as hard on me as they could’ve been, but they were disappointed. Jeongguk was the first to say she did it on purpose.”

“I believe him.”‌ Seokjin’s voice was barely above a whisper.

“I‌ do too. I tried to get a job, I‌ mean I was going to have a kid. So I stopped taking school as seriously. I figured if I‌ passed just above the bar it would be enough for art school. Hyejin kept telling me that being a parent was a full-time thing. She wasn’t going to let me go to art school. I told her that I WAS going. There were plenty of fathers in college! I‌ tried damn hard to get above the bar while working. It’s was 8 months of hell with Hyejin. Jeongguk would invite me to hang out with him and his friends, only for Hyejin to somehow find us and tell off Jimin like he was trying to steal me away. I‌ told her to cut it out, only for her to tell me I was hers until the baby was born. Jeong–”‌

“Bitch.”‌ I choked on air.

Seokjin patted my back as I coughed and sputtered, “Are you okay!?”‌ He questioned, worry written all over his face. My choking turned into laughter as I leaned onto Seokjin’s lap.

“What!? I’m sorry, but that’s crazy stalker level bitchery!”‌ He defended, only causing me to laugh more. Literal tears.

I felt Seokjin’s fingers comb through my hair as he let out small laughs of his own, waiting for me to calm down.

It wasn’t so bad in Seokjin’s lap. It was warm and comforting. Just what I needed for the finale of the horror story. My laughter died down. He didn’t stop playing with my hair as my breath evened out.

“Jeongguk was going to move here. But he stayed until Junseok was born.” I‌ said softly.

I rubbed my face more against his thigh, “That was nice of him.”‌Seokjin’s voice was feather-light.

“She left us.”‌ I‌ stated.

Seokjin’s fingers froze.

“Her parents were insisting I should marry her. My parents would fight back. A few weeks before Junseok was born, her parents put us in an apartment to live together. My mother hated it. It was pretty high-end. A few days before Junseok was born, Hyejin and I got into a fight about us getting married. I wasn’t going to do it. I would support her and my child. I‌ would make sure he grew up right, but I wasn’t going to trap myself in a loveless marriage. So when Junseok was born. She ignored me almost the whole time. Only waking up to feed him then going back to bed. Jimin, Taehyung, and Jeongguk were more excited to see him than she was. It was no surprise that as soon as she was able to walk around, she packed her things, handed me Junseok and left everything to me.”‌

I felt wet hit my cheek.

After a moment of confusion, I looked up at Seokjin. His eyes were red, tears beginning to streak down his cheeks.

I‌ quickly sat up to cup his face, “Why are you crying?”‌ I asked, trying to wipe away as many tears as I would.

“He’s such a great son. Why wouldn’t she just give him a chance?‌!” I’ve never seen him so hurt and angry.

I let out a sigh, “She came back last year. She tried to act like nothing happened. She just kept coming over and saying I was the problem for not giving her a chance. He knows her as his aunt, which creeps me out. So I moved so she would leave us alone. She just knows I’m in Seoul.”‌ I sagged my shoulders and dropped my hands to his thighs.

“Well she can suck my ass he’s my son now.”‌

“WHY IS EVERYONE TRYING TO CLAIM MY SON??” I‌ demanded.

Seokjin chuckled, “I’m telling you, he’s a great boy. You did perfect.”‌ His voice was soft and comforting.

He placed his hand in my hair to ruffle it, “You and your son are perfect for me.”‌

He’s face was still blotched red. His eyes shined with the light and his nose was as red as his ears. He was beautiful. It hurt to see him cry, but I couldn’t help the fondness that built in my chest.

“You’re perfect for us too.”‌ I‌ whispered.

His eyes turned into crescents as his smile grew.

“You’re even handsome when you cry.”‌ I‌ smirked.

“Yah!”‌ The switch flipped.

Seokjin drew back to smack the back of my head, “I’m starting to think you only want me around for my looks!”‌

“That’s not true!” I rubbed the back of my head with a pout, “I keep you around because you cook and make dad jokes.”‌

“…Do you appreciate them?”‌

“Very much so.”‌

“…Then I will continue to stay.”‌

Seokjin and I walked into the apartment building hand-in-hand. I would occasionally swing our hands, being the idiot I‌ was. Seokjin had a thing for winking at people who stared, which I had to scold him for.

Upon exiting the elevator, Seokjin turned to me, “How about I hang out at your apar-”‌

A‌ loud shriek cut Seokjin off. Making us both jump and look down the hall.

“JUNSEOK GIVE ME THE BASKET OF TOWELS!!!”‌ I could hear Jeongguk’s muffled yelling from in the apartment.

“SECRET AGENT SEOK WILL USE THEM TO ESCAPE THE EVIL VILLAIN!”‌

“YOU USE THEM TO CLIMB OUT THE WINDOW AND I WILL GRAB SCIS- STOP TYING THEM TOGETHER YOUR FATHER WILL KILL ME!”‌

I let out a deep sigh, turning to Seokjin, “You still sure he’s a good son?”‌

Seokjin gave me a big smile, “He’s tormenting Jeongguk. He’s the best son.”‌

I‌ could hear Junseok scream.

“SCREAM ALL YOU WANT! YOU CAN’T GO OUT THE WINDOW!!!”‌

Seokjin let out a sigh of his own, his hand tightened around mine, “Let’s go handle our son, shall we?”‌

[creek-cryptid-deluxe]

Some of you guys may remember awhile back (but not THAT long ago) that I was kind of losing my shit because The Spawn was neglecting her dog duties that she agreed to do with my dad when Indie was brought into our household. Yeah? No? Eh, either way I have an update on that. 

Just a small recap for anyone who doesn’t remember or is new here (I’m still pretending that people actually read this like... for realsies): Way back in August I said no to The Spawn bringing home a dog 5 seperate times because I knew how it would end up. Then she went to my dad, who is soft, and my dad told me that he said yes, but under certain terms and conditions. (TERMS: The Spawn was to handle all expenses related to said dog, would handle all care, training, and exercise needs and at no point was responsibility for the creature to be put on me at all because I had already unwillingly taken on responsibility for Bailey via him bringing her home and I don’t need more.) I laughed and said “Yeah... sure.”

end of Sept we noticed something was wrong with pup’s left front leg. After numerous vet visits and lots of funds, Indie was put on one room, no jumping, no running restrictions from early Oct until the first week of December because her shitbag previous owner had broken that leg in 2 places and while it had almost entirely healed, it had clearly not been treated because one break was at her elbow growth plate, causing her elbow to grow out sideways. So there was an orthopedic operation to remove the already present buildup that causes arthritis, then shave down some bone and pin her elbow back together. 

Since December, The Spawn has been HARDCORE slacking off on her duties to exercise the pup, who as a rat terrier/chaos demon mix has an abundance of energy that if not properly channeled and expelled, leads to significant criminal activity. The Spawn was taking her for a 30 min walk MAYBE 3 times a week and not doing any other play. Meanwhile, my broken down ass was trying to make up for it by walking her or doing HOURS of laser hunting and fetch. Dad tried to help by walking her with Bailey every night, but about 4 weeks ago that ended with him getting a broken rib because the girls saw a cat before he did and he didn’t have time to brace himself. He has been publicly banned from walking the little one. 

RECAP DONE.

So me supplementing has been really wearing on me. The entire reason I don’t personally have any pets (despite very much wanting a bunny or a couple rat friends) is that I don’t have the energy to be responsible for their care. So for the last few months, every 2 weeks or so, I break down to dad, ranting and crying about how I can’t keep doing this and that he allowed this to happen, so it’s his problem and he needs to fix it like... NOW because if it continues, I’m going to get involved and I will not be nice. As in every day that she doesn’t exercise the dog properly, she will lose her tv for a day. No entertainment for her dog means no entertainment for her. He kept saying “no no no I’ll do it.” then not fucking doing it. 

2 days ago, I broke. No ranting. No anger. Just broken sobs. It’s just too much. He promised AGAIN to talk to her. Well yesterday there was an incident that was the last straw for him I guess. 

While he was at work, The Spawn went to walk Indie. When she does walk Indie, once for 30 mins, she’s been implementing training to get her to be better behaved on the walks because Indie suffers from barrier aggression. When on the leash, behind the fence that surrounds our yard, or behind the windows inside the house, if she sees another dog walk by she loses it. Hell when getting them ready for walks, once she is on leash, she will lose her shit on Bailey. SO The Spawn has been filling her hoodie pouch with treats and before they even leave, they go to the door, The Spawn says “Sit. Wait...Wait...” with the intent of Indie sitting until the door is open. Eventually there will be a command involved that gives Indie the all clear to get up and head out. 

So they go through that yesterday around 3 or 4 in the afternoon. They depart for their walk around the neighborhood and within a few minutes I hear Indie’s “I’m losing my shit” bark/snarl combo and The Spawn yelling commands at her. A minute or two later, The Spawn storms in with Indie in tow and says “Well since she decided she can’t behave, we aren’t walking today.” And I looked at her skeptically from across the room because dogs don’t work like that AND exercise is not a privilege for dogs, it’s a necessity. So not walking her because she misbehaved would be on par with me not allowing The Spawn dinner because she misbehaved. Then, seeing my face, The Spawn says “She needs to learn that there are consequences for her actions.”

Y’ALL. I involuntarily laughed, so I had to turn away from her and pretend I was coughing. Let’s talk about why I find this hilarious. This statement came from a 16 yr old child who a few weeks ago was asked to watch the dogs for a couple hours while I went to grandma’s to help her with something. I had been reminding her DAILY for a week that this was happening. As I expected, she tried to weasel out of it. I told her that it wasn’t up for discussion, she was doing it, and that I had phrased it as a question as a courtesy. She began to argue. I told her 3 times over the span of an hour that if she didn’t stop arguing that there would be consequences. She chose to continue, so she found herself grounded from her tv and car for the day. (At the end of that hour and after 3 warnings, all via text and verifiable, I finally just told her to bring me her keys. She chose, instead, to come downstairs, empty handed, and CONTINUE to argue, so she lost the tv too.) She threw a massive tantrum which ended with her screaming and crying to my dad about how abusive and mean I am. *insert eyeroll from both of us*  All over, what? The consequences of her own actions. 

So you see why this was funny. Anyway, I let her go upstairs and text dad that we needed to talk when he arrived and to text me so I could meet him out in the garage. 

I met him out there and relayed the events to him. He also involuntarily laughed about the dog needing to learn that her actions have consequences. Then he said “Ok, I’m talking to her tonight.” 

Now, my dad has a signature move for when he has to have tough or unpleasant conversations. He says “Let’s go get ice cream.” I think it’s meant to soften the blow while also catching the person off guard and being in public for less chance of a scene. 

Anyway, they talked. The overall gist was “we made a deal. the deal is not being upheld. Bailey is a much lower energy dog but still requires 2 seperate 4 mile walks a day, and your high energy PUPPY is getting 1/4 of that at best on most days and your mom and I have been picking up the slack as best we can but that has resulted in a broken rib for me and your mom is really at the end of her rope and has been unable to actually rest for a full couple days like she needs to recover from all the random shit she does for you like covering kettle corn and berries in chocolate.”

The Spawn tried to make excuses. “I’m in school full time AND working.” My dad responded with: “First of all, you aren’t in school full time because you do 2 hrs a day in person and then another hour online AT MOST 5 days a week, then work 4-6 hrs at night 4 days a week. Second of all, I work 13 hrs a day 5 days a week and yet I still find a way to make sure my dog’s needs are met via a 4-6 mile walk before work and another in the evening after dark, unless your mom is up to pokemon in the park, which Bailey comes with us for and gets significantly more walks. So that excuse is b.s.”

She mentioned that she tried that day but she misbehaved. dad told her that no matter how she is behaving, walks are not negotiable. Then he used my dinner analogy. She finally gave up trying to make excuses to be lazy and told him that on days she doesn’t have both work and school she will do 2 hrs worth of walks. (I mentioned to dad that this leaves 3 days a week where she is implying she doesn’t have to do anything. he said he will address that but not that night.)

To her credit, The Spawn has done 2 hour long walks today. She even came up with a plan. The first half of each is structured walk/training time and the second half will be at the dog park across the street so that she has unstructured running time where she can get up to full speed. Keeps her from getting frustrated and bored on the walk and allows her to get full speed runs in without killing The Spawn’s knees. 

We shall see how this holds up long term. Fingers crossed and all that. 

[aesthetically0b5essed]

Mom doesn't want you. Grandma takes you in.

No change.

Dad died. Mom gets lonely. She decides that you will do. So she takes you from grandma.

Mom can't afford her own place so we live with grandma and grandpa.

Mom makes you steer the car while she does her makeup in the rear view mirror.

Mom leaves you in the car while she spray tans and when you open a bottle of shaken up Pepsi she laughs at you and makes you feel stupid.

Her car only seats two people so you get shoved in this little crawl space.

This is her second car of the same model because she crashed the last one into a gas station.

We go on vacation to the Bahamas and she meets the perfect old fat man to take care of her.

He buys me stuff to buy my love. I barely even played Spyro. I'd rather play catch but my parents are too busy for that.

Mom gets pregnant and tells me how much I always wanted a sibling. I mention that I wanted one my own age but that's easily forgotten. I'm 10.

One fight got extra bad and if I didn't call the police he might have smothered my mother but we spent the next three days in a nice hotel in NYC so it was all good.

I started getting bad grades in school and not doing my homework. I ace every test but do no homework and nobody can figure out why.

I become a problem child. I rebel and hate authority. You have no idea why.

I am blamed and told that I will never amount to anything to make you feel better about your pathetic lives.

I am overweight and look different than most people in the neighborhood we moved to. I'm in love with someone with anorexia. So I develop an eating disorder.

Everyone compliments me and says how good I look. I love this. I drink it up. The girl I liked falls for me. This is who I need to be.

I don't deserve to be happy. She will leave me. I am ugly. I ruin everything before she can.

I still think about her daily.

You start going crazy after highschool. You aren't going to college because who would pay for it not your step dad.

You never liked drinking. Weed was cool because you don't get a hangover but it's not strong enough anymore. If you do coke you don't have a hangover though.

Sarah comes into your life and accelerates everything. She gets pregnant right before she cheats on you and then makes you hold her hand through the entire abortion process. I am 19. She ends up happily married to a soldier from California a few years later.

You are ready to leave. You cannot stand living here anymore. This place these people it's all too much. So you steal your friends girl that you liked and run away to Wisconsin with her.

She quickly realized I'm not an adult and cannot take care of her so she leaves. Spoiler alert she's pregnant too but neither of us know it was Christmas day.

You spend 2 months on suicide watch. She has the cops come and check on you. They smell weed so they search your house and charge you for possession. Yes. They came to see if I was going to kill myself and then thought I deserved a drug charge instead.

You run out of money so you crawl back to your mother.

You meet the worst woman in the world so naturally you fall in love with her.

She punches out your teeth but the blood tastes like love.

You break up and your friend overdoses. You get a job in Syracuse and think life might be starting again.

Then the worst woman calls you and convinces you to let her move in.

My boss realizes I'm not ever going to be sexually attracted to him so I am fired for no reason (I collect every dime of unemployment out of spite and refuse to help them with a $10K error that I could have easily solved).

You go on vacation and the worst woman goes insane. She destroys the entire apartment. You decide not to go back.

You decide to help take care of your grandparents to avoid the stress and drama. You work from home and things are fairly peaceful.

Mother calls your grandparents drunk and high all the time to talk to her parents but you play loud music so you don't have to hear.

I need to escape. I need to leave. I need out of here. Please.

[tfiolarry]

tfiol chapter two: pretty

summary: simply, the girls meet their grandmas and make a friend.

[one] [three] 

give us feedback :) 

A/N: gif not ours creds to owner

SATURDAY 

11:55 AM 

STYLINSON HOME - LONDON 

Louis and Harry already woke up, the girls fed them breakfast, gave them a bath. Now, they are getting them ready to meet their moms, Jay and Anne. 

HARRY: (putting Dani's hair in pigtails) Alright, so on the agenda for today is meeting with moms and then we’ll head to the park for a cute little picnic.

JORDYN: (Louis putting her hair in a pigtails also) What's genda? 

LOUIS: An agenda’s like a game plan, o’ tiny one. Like...all the fun stuff we wanna do with you guys today. (finishes her hair)

DANI: Fun stuff?

LOUIS: Yeah, like snacks and bubbles or...barbies, maybe chalk or coloring...but all that, plus picnic.

DANI: (tries to look up at Harry even though he’s doing her hair) For real?

HARRY: (nods and puts cute bows in her hair) Anything you guys wanna do, we will get it for you.

JORDYN: I like bubbles and grapes. (smiles)

DANI: Chalk too.

LOUIS: We can bring it all.

DANI: We can have grapes now?

LOUIS: (looks at Harry) Now?

HARRY: (looks at Louis and shrugs) I guess. But only a few, because we still have lunch later.

JORDYN: (claps her hands) Yay! 

HARRY: Alright Ms. Dani, you are all set.

DANI: (smiles a lot and touches it) Pretty. (gets down from her chair and hugs Harry) Thanks.

HARRY: (pouts and hugs her back) You’re so welcome.

JORDYN: (to Louis) I done too? 

LOUIS: Yes you are indeed, my little poppet. All done and just as pretty as Dani’s, I promise.

JORDYN: (smiles, turns to him and holds her pinky out) Pwomise? 

LOUIS: (smiles and pinky promises her) I promise, 100%. (boops her nose with his other hand) How about we get you guys those grapes now? Sound good?

JORDYN: (nods quickly and gets off the chair after letting go of Louis pinky)

They head to the kitchen with the girls and give them handfuls of grapes each. While they are eating the grapes there is a knock on the door. Wonder who it could be? 

HARRY: I got it. (goes to the door and opens it) Mothers! Hello! (hugs both at the same time) 

ANNE: (hugs him back and is a smiley woman) Hi lovebug.

JAY: (hugs back also) Hello indeed, darling, where are these adorable children of yours? 

HARRY: (lets go of them and opens the door more for them to come in) They’re in the kitchen eating grapes. Come in.

They join Harry and co. inside the house, making their way to the kitchen where Louis, Dani, and Jordyn are eating grapes - seedless green ones, red are for chumps. The girls are casually munching and Louis’ gonna get up.

LOUIS: Moms! How exciting is this? (goes to Jay first and gives her a big hug and then Anne) Lovely to see you guys, like always.

DANI: (while chewing) Who that?

JORDYN: (shrugs and eats more grapes) Moms?

HARRY: Dani, Jordyn, these are our moms who are now your grandmas.

JORDYN: (looks at Dani to let her know who they are) Grandmas. 

DANI: (smiles) Grandmas. (baby waves to them) Hiiii.

JAY: (waves back) Hello, you are so cute.

DANI: I know.

LOUIS: Dani…

DANI: (giggles) Thanks.

JORDYN: Hewwo (waves also) I Jordyn, (points to Dani) This Dani.

DANI: (nods and stuffs her mouth with grapes)

ANNE: (laughs a little) I’m Grandma Anne, nice to meet you both.

DANI: (tries to talk but she’s got grapes)

ANNE: (looks at Louis and Harry) I think...she’s got too many grapes. 

JAY: Yeah, I’ll second that.

LOUIS: Harry, it’s your turn to fix this. I fixed the plant situation the other day, so...

HARRY: (scoffs) How do I even fix this? (goes to Dani) Hey bub, you got too many grapes...one at a time, yeah?

DANI: (looks at him and then decides to fix this by spitting them out on a paper towel on the counter and looks at him) Okay. (gets a new grape now and does a little dance)

HARRY: Okay. (smiles at Louis, Anne and Jay) Parenting isn’t so hard after all. 

JORDYN: (drops a grape) No! (pouts and is almost about to cry because she was really excited for that grape)

JAY: Are you sure? 

LOUIS: Harry, it’s still your turn to be fixing this. 

HARRY: (is pouting but goes to Jordyn) Hey, hey. (grabs another grape and gives it to her) Look, don't be sad - there's more grapes.

JORDYN: But...(points to the one that fell)...I want that one. (pouts) 

LOUIS: That one is yucky, love, it’s on the floor. 

ANNE: (teasing) Thought it was Harry’s turn.

LOUIS: I’m...being a good person, sh.

DANI: No sad, just do like... (grabs a grape and wipes it off with her hands)... that.

HARRY: It’s still yucky, Dan.

JORDYN: (big baby sigh and grabs a new grape) 

HARRY: I’m sorry Jordyn, it’s just how life goes.

JORDYN: No.

LOUIS: But it is, Jordy, it is how life goes, sometimes life gives you yucky grapes on the floor, and you just have to accept it, why? Because big girls accept those things. And you guys are big girls for real, so just say bye bye to it.

DANI: (pouts) Bye bye.

JAY: Kind of depressing to tell them that’s life, isn’t it?

DANI: Who is pressing?

HARRY: Don’t worry about that. The better question is who is ready for the park? 

JORDYN: (gasp and raises her hand) Me! 

DANI: Me too! And...chalk too.

LOUIS: Yes, Dani, the chalk is ready for the park as well.

DANI: Good. You too?

LOUIS: Yeah, me too.

DANI: And grandmas?

ANNE: Of course.

JAY: Always.

DANI: (to Harry) You too?

HARRY: (laughs) Yes me too. 

•• 

SATURDAY

3:12 PM

NEIGHBORHOOD PARK

Jay and Anne came over earlier in the day to meet the girls before Louis and Harry rounded them up and got them ready to go to the park. They requested chalk, granted they went shopping for toys the other day and picked some up, so they brought it with them. At the park, Dani and Jordyn walk ahead of the adults. Louis is holding a bag of snacks, Harry has a cooler bag for drinks and stuff, and Jay is holding a bin of chalks.

ANNE: (looking at Louis and Harry) They’re really lovely girls, you two.

LOUIS: Of course they are, they’re being raised by us. We’re the loveliest of the lovely.

JAY: Debatable, at least for you.

ANNE: For sure, I agree. 

LOUIS: Hey! Harry, back me up here!

HARRY: (looks around and points, ignoring him) Oh! We should sit there! 

ANNE: That’s an excellent choice, my darling boy.

LOUIS: Wow, I see how it is. I just get bullied around here and get no back up, just pointedly ignored. Just rude. 

DANI: (goes to Jay and taps her leg) Grandma? Chalk please?

JAY: (opens it and hands her the bin) Be careful, okay? Try not to drop them, they’ll break.

DANI: (gasps) Oh no. (looks at Jordy) We be careful, okay? They break.

JORDYN: (looks at her) Why? 

DANI: Dunno. (looks at Jay) Why break?

JAY: Science?

LOUIS: Mom. Science? Really?

JAY: It’s a good answer, hush, you.

DANI: (looks at Jordyn again) That.

JORDYN: (makes an unsure face and looks at Louis) Why? What’s a...(struggles to say science). 

LOUIS: Science is the reason why everything is everything. Like why are you guys the cutest? Science. Why is grass green? Science. (joking) Why is Harry goofy looking? Science. 

DANI: (looks at Harry) Goofy? 

HARRY: (does the goofy laugh) 

JORDYN: (laughs a lot) 

DANI: (also cracks up but is careful because the chalk)

LOUIS: See this? The man makes our children laugh, I knew I picked the right guy to fall in love with.

HARRY: (smiles) I also picked the right guy to fall in love with - who else would be so down to risk being mobbed to get their kids chalk and bubbles? 

LOUIS: Approximately zero people, you lucky son of a gun.

JORDYN: (stops laughing and wipes her face) That funny. 

LOUIS: He’s a comedian. I mean...he is very funny.

DANI: (she’s done laughing too and puts the chalk bin on the ground and starts drawing with a green one)

Anne and Jay go to sit in the spot that Harry pointed out, and Louis follows (hopefully Harry too). They sit and supervise the kiddos from...close enough.

HARRY: Girls, we’re going to be over there. (points again) If you need anything, yell, got it? 

JORDYN: (nods) Got it.

DANI: Yes, got it. For real.

HARRY: Alright, good. (leaves them) 

JORDYN: (sits with Dani) You like dem? 

DANI: (holds up her chalk) Chalks?

JORDYN: (rolls her eyes) No! Hawwy, Lou Lou, and Grandmas?

DANI: Ohhh, yeah. (continues drawing) They nice. And funny, like goofy. You too?

JORDYN: Yeah, (picks up chalk) I happy. (starts drawing too)

DANI: Me too. Happy. 

Dani and Jordyn continue to scribble on the pavement, creating some incomprehensible images that would only make sense to their young minds. They encourage the family to come see when they have a lot going on, and they appreciate their creative efforts in full. While the adults relax and talk, making sure to check on them every now and then, a small boy - Chase - is riding his scooter near them. He is going back and forth, being sure not to ride through their drawing. He makes his way over to them though and looks at their drawings. 

CHASE: Hey.

DANI: (looks up at him from her spot on the ground and smiles) Hiii.

JORDYN: (squints at him like “who are you”) Hey. 

CHASE: I’m Chase. You?

DANI: Dani. (points to Jordyn) Jordyn.

CHASE: Okay. What’s that? (points to their art on the pavement)

JORDYN: Flowers. (keeps drawing)

DANI: (asking him for an opinion) Pretty?

CHASE: (nods) Pretty. (fixes his elbow pads)

DANI: (smiles) Thanks. What that?

CHASE: These, I have ‘cause I felled.

DANI: (nods) Ouchies.

CHASE: (nods too) Lots of ouchies.

JORDYN: (looks up at him) You felled on that? (points to his scooter)

CHASE: Yeah. But not scary, just...ouchies. 

DANI: Just ouchies. I try?

CHASE: Dunno. Maybe.

DANI: (pouts) Okay.

CHASE: (sits with them and touches drawings they did already) 

JORDYN: (offers him blue chalk) Draw? 

CHASE: (takes it) Yes, I help?

JORDYN: Yeah. (point above their drawing) Do sky. 

DANI: Do sky pretty, okay?

CHASE: (nods and starts drawing) Pretty. Okay.

JORDYN: Like Dani.

DANI: Me? No… (bashful smile) you.

CHASE: Both pretty. 

JORDYN: Both? 

CHASE: Yeah. Like...you two. Mommy telled me.

JORDYN: Thanks. You pretty. (nods)

CHASE: (smiles) Thanks.

The children continue drawing, talking about their matching ages, favorite colors and toys, and how Chase got a baby sister in their own baby way. He claims he got up and “mommy wasn’t big anymore”. Interesting. Meanwhile, the family keeps watch on all three of them, especially when Chase does let Dani try his scooter. It’s a fun day, in summary.

A/N: Thanks for so many notes on the first fic it really means a lot 🥺

[devastationwagon]

@aloveaffairwithlight found this MySpace survey and implored her cadre of sister-wives to participate. Since I've been inexplicably jumped into that gang of lovely weirdos, I'm obliged to comply.

1.My grandpa once: chased my little sisters around the house with a yardstick. He was such a gentle man that we all couldn't stop laughing. I mean, we all had to fall to the floor, just so we could start breathing again.

2.Never in my life have I: played red rover in a prison in Thailand.

3. When I was younger, I: thought everything in the world was made of magic.

4.High school was: a time to rebuild and discover. Also, there were still a lot of combs in back pockets.

5.When I'm nervous: I unfortunately catch myself humming to myself.

6.The last time I really cried was: when my daughter texted me last week. She had dropped out of college for a year, and she'd just finished her first term back. Her renewed energy for learning and her pride in her efforts and her 4.0 ended up making me cry. I'm such a nerd, but when she said, "Learning is cool!" I lost it. Seeing your kids happy and engaged with the world is about as emotional as I get these days.

7.If I were to get married right now: I would be arrested for bigamy. I mean, I think that's still a crime, right?

8.My hair is: thick and in need of a cleanup.

9.My feet are: neglected way too often.

10.When I was 5: I watched a kid get shot in the stomach with an arrow fired by a nice girl named Tessa. We were shooting arrows at cardboard boxes in the alley behind the junkyard, when these boys came running up between us and the boxes. They were teasing her, calling her two-ton Tessa. Her fingers slipped off the bow string, and suddenly this kid had an arrow sticking out of his stomach. Luckily he survived.

11.Last Christmas: I gave you my heart.

12.When I turn my head left: it looks like a nervous tic motion.

13.When I turn my head right: I see too many computer screens.

14.My life is not complete without: buffers of alone time jammed between social events or work, which, in my case, is a social event.

15.By this time next year: it will be winter again.

16.I have a hard time understanding: willful ignorance.

17.One time at a family gathering: My grandparents and all my grandma's brothers and sisters decided to try marijuana. It was one of the weirdest Christmas parties I've ever experienced. I was a little kid, but I feel high just thinking about my Aunt Emma's living room and those big windows and the tall white Christmas tree and the deep white carpet like a bearskin rug.

18.Take my advice: you are an idiot when you’re young, and only slightly less-so when you're older.

19.My ideal breakfast is: chorizo and eggs with refried beans and tortillas.

20.If you visit my hometown: you will be confused about which one to choose, since I moved around so much as a kid. You will statistically end up in a small midwestern town with corn and trailer parks with Dr. Pepper machines.

21.My friends are: mostly all in a band with me right now.

22.If you spend the night at my house: you will be provided pajamas, and you will stay up very late, listening to music and laughing. If it's not summer, there is also a 90% chance that you will be in front of a fire.

23.I would stop my wedding if: my betrothed didn't show up. Beyond that, nothing would stop me.

24.The world could do without: yield signs.

25.I'd rather lick the belly of a cockroach than: answer this question.

26.The most recent thing I've bought myself is: good headphones.

27.And, by the way: I don’t ever buy myself things.

28.The last time I was high: I got really fixated on writing a song about a man who spent his last days and money with a prostitute. Then I fell asleep on the couch.

29.In the past I shouldn't have been: so dishonest with myself and others.

30.Once, at a bar/club: is how way too many of my stories begin.

31.Last night, I: sat by the fire with my wife. We listened to music, while we talked and texted each other dank memes.

32.If I didn't have any obligations tomorrow: I would take a long walk in the woods, then walk to a neighborhood bar and enjoy a Guinness and a cheeseburger.

33.A better name for me would be: I have no idea, but I would have been named Leah, if I were a girl.

34.In the last 6 months: the signs of not exercising beyond taking long walks are starting to show. Also, my mom moved into my house, and that has been a real mixed bag.

35.If I ever go back to school: I would be a slower, but more diligent, student.

36.I bet you didn't know: I was wearing only underwear when I was introduced to the members of The Romantics.

37.I am: superman, and I know what's happening.

38.I read: less than I used to. I also I read more non-fiction than I used to.

39.Every birthday: I try to will it to go by unnoticed.

40.I regret: a few things, but I would not change them.

I tag anyone who wants to play along with this nonsense. XO!

[thewayiremember]

4.5 - PARENTS

           I’m five years of age, playing with my toys in our small and smelly apartment in Poland. I don’t know the man that mom’s brought home today. He whispers something in her ear and she smiles. I wonder what’s so funny. She never smiles! Their faces get too close to each other and my mom decides to stop this foolishness and gets up to show him the rest of the apartment. She shows him the bedroom first.

           I’m hungry. Actually, I’ve been hungry for a while now, but I don’t say anything in case mom gets emotional like she did the last time when I was complaining. She doesn’t like it when I ask her for things and then she starts saying bad words. I don’t know what is so fascinating about our bedroom, but they’re spending quite some time in there, so I decide to climb up the stool to have a chance of reaching the tabletop. I do. And what I find is beyond my expectations. I was hoping for some fresh loaf of bread, but I discover something way better. A beautiful cake with chocolate topping still slightly dripping off the edges. That’s what she was doing when she told me not to interrupt her while she was in the kitchen!

           I wonder if it’s for me. Maybe she wanted to surprise me and that’s why she didn’t want me to see it. I wish I knew how to read and figure out what those white decorative letters mean. But… we don’t know any people… Surely it can’t be for that guy in the other room… She barely knows him! And if it’s for me then I’m certain that she wouldn’t mind if I ate some of it now. I don’t like when my belly makes those weird noises. It hurts.

           Mom’s always in a good mood when her guy friends are coming over. This time is no different.

“Call me,” she whispers to him while they’re saying goodbye to each other at the door.

“Mhm, sure,” he doesn’t sound sure. But she’s pleased either way and after she closes the door and turns around to face me, her smile fades away.

“What’s that on your face?” she asks. Her voice is shaky. She slowly passes me by carefully examining my face from a distance and eventually enters the kitchen. For a while, she doesn’t say anything, but then she grabs the phone and dials a number. “I’m sorry Mrs. Kamińska, but unfortunately your order won’t be ready today… yes, I’m really sorry for the trouble.” She hangs up and goes to the bedroom again. She’s been very tired lately. I think it might have something to do with me…

           I’m five years of age, but later. When you’re only five the time goes slower, so it feels like a lot more than just later. My mom is on the phone with her mom.

“Please, can I leave him with you? Just for a couple of months, to get started.” You already had this conversation with grandma, remember mom? They took the cat last week. I don’t think she’s pleased with the answer, because she hangs up and starts crying. She must have really loved that cat. I’m sure they will take care of him just fine.

           I’m still five years old, but more six than five. Mom got a new place for us, but everything here is so different. It’s always sunny, and people use words I’ve never heard before. We’re like on a whole another planet. Mom calls it America.

           Our new apartment is even smaller than the one we had back in Poland, but at least it doesn’t smell. I have my own bed now, and I’ve never realized before how much it affects the quality of sleep. That’s the nicest change so far.

           I’m six and all grown up. Mom has a new guy friend, David, who I guess called back as he promised because he keeps coming back from time to time. He likes telling stories my brain doesn’t comprehend that well, perhaps because of the language barrier, but my mom is fascinated by them. She earns money by making sweets now. I’m surprised I’m not fat yet after all the cakes I’ve been having for breakfast lately. Sometimes she takes me to her bakery so that I am not home alone, but there are always so many people and I can’t focus on doing my homework. I’ve been a freshman for only a month and I already have so much work. School is brutal. I don’t understand most of it, but my teachers are pretty forgiving. For now. Even Mrs. Garcia who doesn’t have the best reputation among kids sees my struggle and patiently waits for me to adapt.

           I’m six and a half and I call David “dad”, now, so I guess he’s staying for longer. Sometimes he wants to play soccer with me after school. I’m not good at soccer. I’m not good at anything. He doesn’t like it. He says I should be good at soccer and that he doesn’t understand why the only activity I like is gymnastics. You don’t have a team, you work alone, what’s not to like? No one can blame you for messing up. But every time mom’s with him her mood comes up so I go along and play with him every time he asks because I don’t want to scare him away.  

           David works as a history teacher at my school, but I think someone forces him to do it since he always comes home annoyed. Much like mom used to when she worked in retail or as a waitress. I don’t blame him, teenagers are even worse than kids my age. I overheard David and mom talking about him quitting his job and getting a new one at the museum. I think that’d be great. The less angry people in this world the better.

           On Christmas Eve David tells mom he has a present for her. “It’s a big one,” he says. We get into his car and drive for a while. For the whole ride, mom can’t stop trying to guess what it is, but when we finally arrive at the planned destination it turns out none of it was correct. He bought her a house as a present? What is he, rich?

“Let’s move in together, what do you say?” he asks, and mom indeed has a lot to say as she jumps around from excitement. I don’t think I’ve ever seen her so happy.

           The house is enormous. Big enough to get lost inside. The bathroom has both a bathtub and a shower cabin. Like in the movies. Mom is the most thrilled about the kitchen. And no wonder she is, it’s the size of our current living room. And it has a dishwasher! We’re going to live like rich people.

“Wow, there are even more rooms above us? Do I get my own?” I shriek from anticipation in my poor English as I walk up to the stairs, but I quickly regret my question when I see the look on David’s face.

“As a matter of fact, yes, you do, but you’re going to have to behave from now on,” he uttered. What does he mean? When have I not behaved? I wait for him to elaborate, but he doesn’t. I think when he said “Let’s move in together,” he really meant just mom and him and I’m just a necessary price that comes with it. I hope that by behaving he meant getting out of his way. That would be easy.

           My room is huge! And not just because it’s still empty. I think even when we get some furniture and the biggest bed in the world there’ll still be plenty of space to do… whatever people do in their own rooms. I’ll figure it out.

           We move in a month later leaving the apartment life behind us. I have to get used to the silence but I think that’s for the best. No more covering my ears when “grown-ups are talking”, no more listening to “mind your business, Ian”, and no more going to bed before 8:00.

          The neighborhood seems to be nice. Perfect families with smiling parents everywhere you look. Each house competing in size and the amount of Christmas decorations still hanging up at the end of January. Just like you see on TV.

          The house across ours stands out in its normality. It almost looks weird compared to the other ones. They also must have moved in not that long ago because they keep bringing more boxes inside. It’s a small family, like ours. Mom, dad, and a boy. He might be my age.  

          I wonder if he has made any friends, yet. I haven’t. But that’s okay. Maybe when my English gets better I’ll start saying “hi” to people. For now, I’m embarrassed that I’m six years old and don’t know how to speak. But I’m not worried, it’s all going to fit into place eventually, isn’t it?

[snarkythewoecrow]

Frayed Ties

by @snarky-drabbles and @heatherica45

Summary: Bucky never went looking for his family, afraid of what he’d find or what they’d think of him. He thought if they were out there, they would be better off without him. It wasn’t until a little boy who shared his name ducked into the coffee shop to hide from a fight that his feelings changed.

Read on Ao3

The bell above the door to the coffee shop chimed, and Bucky looked up just in time to see a kid no older than ten barreling through the door.

Setting his coffee down, he eyed the kid over. The boy had a mop of brown hair and brown eyes to match. His lip was split and bleeding, his knuckles red, and he was peering through the window of the door as if he thought he’d been followed. It was clear the kid was in trouble, and given that he was the one hiding, Bucky assumed he wasn’t the aggressor.

“Buck?” Steve said, making him turn to his friend. Steve had a brow up, a piece of muffin held close to his mouth.

Bucky nodded his chin toward the boy, and Steve followed his gaze, his brow furrowing upon seeing the kid.

The boy turned away from the door, his eyes quickly searching the small coffee shop before he paused on Bucky and Steve.

“Hey, kid,” Bucky said, “you alright?”The kid licked his lips and then pulled a face when his tongue hit the blood. Touching a finger to his busted lip, he shrugged a shoulder and pulled himself a little taller. “Yeah, I’m okay.”

Bucky raised a brow. “That busted lip says otherwise. Why don’t you sit and we’ll call your mom or someone to come get you.” He gestured to open chair at their table.

The kid’s hands flexed in and out of fists for a moment before he nodded and walked over. “I’ll sit but no calling my mom. I promise I’ll be fine—I’ve had worse.”

Steve shifted in his seat, a frown touching his face. “We really should call someone.”

The kid scowled the best he could, but the swollen lip ruined the look. “I ain’t calling my mom. She’ll just get mad that I’ve been fighting again, and it wasn’t even my fault this time.”

“You do this often?” Steve asked.

The kid slumped back in his chair, touching a finger to his lip again. It must be hurting. “Only if they have it coming. Maybe if they’d leave my friend Corey alone, I wouldn’t need to get involved.”

Steve huffed a laugh, shaking his head a little. “Well, I can’t fault you there. Looking after your friends is important, but you should be careful. You sure there’s no one we can call?”

The kid deflated with a sigh. “Not really. Everyone’s working but Grandma Becca, and she never hears the phone.” He looked down at his hands, knuckles still red. “I’ll be alright. It’s already feeling better.”

“If you’re sure,” Bucky said, noticing the way the kid kept glancing at the door, “but why don’t you hang here for a bit longer and make sure whoever’s after you is gone?”

The kid glanced up at him, brows pinching together. “I won’t be bugging you?”

Bucky picked up his coffee, taking a sip. He shrugged. “We weren’t doing much anyway. It’s no problem.”

The kid relaxed back in his chair a little and began fiddling with a loose thread on his shirt.

“So,” Steve started, “since we’re sitting together, why don’t we introduce ourselves. I’m Steve and that guy there is my best friend Bucky.”

The kid started, his head snapping up and turning to Bucky. “Your name’s Bucky? Like for real?”

Bucky’s brows lifted, figuring like most, the kid thought it was a funny name. “Yeah, is that a problem?”

“It just weird—”

“Look, kid,” Bucky interrupted. “Weird or not, it’s my name.”

The kid shook his head, eyes wide. “I didn’t mean to offend you. I just meant it was weird because I never met another Bucky before.” He paused, licking his lips. “That’s … uh … my name, too—well, my nickname.”

That surprised him, even Steve looked a little taken aback.

“Oh, well, you’re the first Bucky I’ve met, too,” Bucky said. “It’s nice to meet you.”  

The kid blinked at him and asked, “Is it a nickname? Like me?”

Bucky nodded. “It’s short for my middle name. What about you?”

“Same, I got my real name from my great … uncle? I don’t know. He was my Grandma Becca’s brother—she’s actually my great-grandma. Anyway, she says he died during the war, that he was a hero, but I don’t know what war it was—just that it was a long time ago.”

Steve glanced at Bucky, and Bucky could see the gears turning in his friend’s head. Steve wasn’t the only one whose mind was quickly jumping to conclusions, conclusions that didn’t seem possible. Bucky couldn’t entertain those thoughts. He didn’t want to get his hopes up like that. The odds seemed impossible.

Steve eyed him for a moment longer before commenting slowly, “Well, do you know who they were fighting? The Germans?”

The younger Bucky frowned at that and tilted his head. Looking at him now, the way his brow wrinkled, Bucky could see his little sister in the boy. “Umm… maybe? I remember she said something about him fighting some really bad people who were killing for no reason—lots of people died,“ he finished quietly.

Steve ran his thumb over the rim of his cup, nodding lightly. “And you said his name was Bucky? Like you?”

The kid nodded. “Yeah, James Buchanan Barnes, same as me,” he said proudly, “except I’m not a Barnes. I’m a Proctor.”

Bucky froze, his limbs tensing then locking as he stared at the little boy in front of him. He could see it. Just add a couple of freckles along his cheeks and nose, add a pair of braided pigtails, and the boy was the spitting image of Becca.

He swallowed thickly and started in a voice just shy of trembling,  "You know, I think my grandpa might have fought with your great uncle in the war.“ He paused, looking to Steve for strength. His friend nodded. "Do you think—do you think I could meet your Grandma Becca, to pay my respects?”

“What’s pay respects?”

Steve cleared his throat. “It’s when you give condolences for someone’s loss.”

The boy seemed to chew on the thought for a moment before coming to a decision. “Okay, I guess. She doesn’t live far from here, so we can walk if you want.”

Bucky’s body seemed to be vibrating with nervous energy. He was hopeful and scared at the same time. He’d hoped his sister had gone on to have a family but he never dared to dream that she was still alive.

What was he going to say? Would she even recognize him after all these years?

He decided that even if she didn’t recognize him, it would be enough just to see her again. It had been so long since he heard her laugh or seen her smile. All he had left was fragmented memories—wisps of things that he could barely hold onto. The chance to see her again meant everything.

Before he could talk himself out of it, he got up, waving at the kid to lead the way. Giving Bucky a bright smile, he scampered out, making the older Bucky walk faster if he wanted to keep up.

The boy was right. It wasn’t that far away, maybe a couple of blocks. It didn’t feel like enough time to prepare. Soon they came to a stop in front of an old brownstone. It was well taken care of and in a nice neighborhood. There were a few steps leading up to the door, wrought iron railings on either side.

The kid didn’t pause long at the door, only taking a second to dig a set of keys from his pocket and unlocking the door. “I come here after school sometimes, so dad made me a key,” he said over his shoulder. “Come on, she’s probably in the kitchen.”

Bucky and Steve exchanged a look before following the kid into the house. They could hear the younger Bucky calling to his grandma from down the hall. Steve nodded in the direction the boy had gone, a supportive hand coming to rest on his shoulder.

With a quick look at the pictures on the walls, Bucky followed the excited voice of the kid.

The floorboards creaked under his feet as he walked toward the doorway at the end of the hall. He could hear Steve behind him.

The walk seemed to take an eternity, yet was passing by in seconds. All too quickly, he was standing in the doorway to the kitchen, staring at a scene he could only dream about.

The younger Bucky was sitting on the kitchen table, legs swinging as he talked animatedly, but the woman he was addressing couldn’t see his wild hand movements as her back was turned. She was stirring something on the stove, every so often a little huff of laughter escaping her at his comments.

Her hair was white but still long, braided loosely. There was a curve to her back that wasn’t there in her youth. But even without seeing her face, he knew this was Becca.

His breath hitched and Bucky took an involuntary step back only to run into a wall of muscle. Steve pressed a hand to his shoulder and murmured just quiet enough for him to hear, “It’s okay.”

Bucky gave a curt nod and stepped fully into the kitchen, placing his hands in his jeans pockets. Clearing his throat, he asked quietly, “Becca?”

The woman paused and glanced over her shoulder at them, her hand stirring the pot faltered and her eyes widened.

“Oh yeah,” young Bucky’s voice cut through the room, “this is Bucky—he has the same name as me! He said his grandpa fought with your brother. Said he wanted to pay respects?”

Becca’s eyes glistened as she stared at the older Bucky, and for a moment, it was like time stood still. He drank in the sight of her. She’d changed so much yet not at all. Beneath the years of laugh lines and touches of age, she was still the same girl he’d looked after growing up. His chest ached with so much emotion he felt like he would drown.

“I’d say he took his time getting here.” Her voice shook a little as she spoke.

Bucky swallowed. “I never meant to be gone so long.”

She raised a frail hand to wipe her tears. “I’m sure you have a story to tell.”

“It’s not all good.”

“The best stories never are.” Her head tilted slightly. “Is that Stevie behind you?”

“Hey, Becca,” Steve said, his voice warm.

She shook her head with a smile. “I almost wouldn’t believe all this if it weren’t for seeing you, too. The two of you were always joined at the hip. Good to see some things never change.”

Opening her arms, she motioned Bucky closer. “I’ve been waiting a long time to hug my big brother again, don’t keep me waiting.”

With tears in his eyes, Bucky crossed the distance and let his sister’s arms wrap around him. He was careful not to hurt her. She felt so delicate in his arms.

“I missed you, Becca. I’m so sorry. I should have come sooner.” He whispered into her shoulder, fighting his own tears.

She chuckled and slapped his arm, thankfully the flesh one. “None of that. You have nothing to be sorry for.”

Bucky grunted in disagreement. “I wish that was true.”

She pulled away, placing a hand on his cheek with a little shake of the head. “It is, James. Whatever’s happened, you’re home now.”

Bucky placed his hand over hers, holding it to his cheek. “I missed you, Becca.”

The elderly woman smiled softly, but before she could respond, a young voice piped up. “Wait—what?”

The adults turned to see the boy gaping at them. Becca chuckled. “Well, young buck, I’ve told you about my brother, the one that died in the war.”

The boy nodded.

She reached down and took Bucky’s hand. “I thought I’d lost him, but, there are many strange things in this world, more than when I was a girl, things we can’t always explain.”

She glanced at Bucky, her lips curling into a smile before looking back to the boy. “Buck, meet your namesake and great great uncle—Bucky Barnes.”

[honeyjaez]

Maze of Miroh- Chapter 1: The Day That Starts It All

The piercing sound of an alarm clock woke Minho up once again from his restless sleep. He groaned in annoyance as his brain registered what was happening and he pouted as he pulled the covers up over his head. His muscles felt weak from his adventure yesterday and he did not have the energy to get out of bed and face the day. Maybe if I stay here and hide, then Jiwon and the other factory leaders won’t bother looking for me and I can be a hermit the rest of my life.

But right as he thought it, a familiar loud knock echoed throughout his small studio apartment, and once again Minho found himself groaning in an accustomed annoyance.

“Go away” he huffed.

“Now Minie, I know you most certainly do not have a death wish.” Hyunjae responded as he continued to knock. Minho snorted, pulling the sheets away from his body but still making no move to open the door “Bold of you to assume I don’t.”

Minho could hear the faint click of disapproval come from Hyunjae as he opened the door finally. “Not funny Lee.”

Rolling his eyes, he motioned for Hyunjae to come in as he began pulling clothes over his body “I don’t know…I find myself pretty hilarious.” This earned a chuckle from the older boy as he began to fiddle with the various objects on top of the dresser. “You’re the only one.”

Minho gave him a look of mocked hurt “Rude!”

Hyunjae snorted in response and bumped the younger in the shoulder “So is making me late waiting for your dumbass. Remember what happened last time we were late for the start of the Work Shift?”

Looking down, Minho suddenly lost his appetite for sass. He remembered the last time they were both late to the start of the shift very clearly. It had been Minho’ fault, he had been helping Jeongwoo look for his sister and was so engrossed in helping this boy that he totally forgot about the time, and it was Hyunjae who found him, Hyunjae who brought him to work, and it was Hyunjae who took the blame for it saying it was his fault. The agents of The Order took him and locked him in a room with no food or water for 2 days as punishment. Minho remember the day so clearly because he had never cried so much when they released him, a wide grin plastered on his face as he looked at the bawling boy. That was the day he learned just how much Hyunjae meant to him.

“-nie. Oi Minie!” Hyunjae snapped his fingers in Minho’s face, bringing him back to reality. “I was only joking, but for real let’s not be late day dreamer.”

Minho just stared at him, his eyes slightly wide as if he just woke up. “Y-Yeah.” Rolling his eyes, Hyunjae grabbed for Minho’s hand and the two friends set out to face the day.

 The outside of Spector was always the same. Loud, cramped and stuffy, causing Minho to scrunch his nose up in mild disgust. How he wished he could live out in a clean world, away from The Order. He thought back to Felix’s story yesterday and how nice that seemingly impossible world would be. Green Trees. Carefree. A life without worry. And most importantly;

A life without The Order.

But alas. Such a world would never exist. Not for him or anyone.

“Hyung!” A familiar voice yelled farther down the street. Minho smiled as he saw Jeongwoo’s bright eyes and smile as he looked at the pair. His felt a familiar pang in his heart as he realized that Jeongwoo would also never have the worry free life that a 12 year old boy like him deserves.

Hyunjae affectionately ruffled the boy’s hair as he came up. “What’s up little man?”

Jeongwoo let out a small giggle as he looked at them with a sparkle in his eyes.

“I got another tip hyungs! This person saw my missing posters and said he saw my sister a few weeks ago!”

Minho’s smile faltered slightly as he listened. Jeongwoo at the small age of 8 was orphaned after their parents went missing one night. People assumed they just up and abandoned their kids. But Minho remembers the night their bodies were recovered along the river. Agents blocked off the entire area but Minho has caught a glimpse of one of the bodies and to this day still shivers at the memory of it. Whoever. Whatever killed them had a lot of rage in them. Those bodies were not human anymore. But The Order wrote it off saying that the killer got away and Jeongwoo and his sister Sejeong were left to fend for themselves.

That is. Until 2 years ago when Sejeong herself went missing.

Since then, the neighborhood started to take turns in caring for the orphaned boy. He spends every day looking for his sister while the boys are at work. Then when it gets dark both he and Hyunjae cook him dinner and spend some time with him as boys do. Sometimes he sleeps with them. Sometimes he goes to Auntie Gayoon’s house. But either way. Their small neighborhood is in agreement that they are all collectively Jeongwoo’s family.

 “That’s awesome Little Man!” Hyunjae picked up the little 10 year old who broke into a fit of laughter. “Just be careful ya hear?”

He put Jeongwoo down who nodded once “I will Hyunjae hyung!” He turned to Minho and surprisingly He felt awkward with the young boy.

“What Hyunjae Hyung said. Be careful and don’t forget dinner at my place tonight!”

Jeongwoo jumped up in the air in excitement “Alright! Minho hyung is cooking!”

Minho snickered at Hyunjae who looked somewhat offended “Why do you never act like this when I cook?”

“Because Hyung” Minho snickered “You cook as well as Grandma Yoo”

“But Grandma Yoo is terrible!”

Minho and Jeongwoo both cackled loudly as they held onto each other. Wiping tears from his eyes, Minho smiled at the blonde haired boy “You said it hyung. Not me”

“Tch. Whatever brat. See if I ever cook for you again.” His words were harsh, but his face was anything but. Jeongwoo tore himself from Minho’s grasp and started to move past them both.

“Bye hyungs! Don’t be late to Work!”

Hyunjae waved back as Minho mimicked the action. “See you little man! Don’t forget! 6               pm at Minie’s here!”

“Hyung!” Minho protested at the use of the nickname in public.

 Little did they know that they would never get to meet for Dinner as the day would separate these three souls forever.

 The walk to their factory was dull and uneventful as the two friends walked in comfortable silence. The quietness was never a problem with Minho, he loved it, and it allowed him to be with his thoughts. But at this current time, he found his thoughts unwelcoming as it constantly faded back to a certain red haired boy and his weird words.

“Neh Hyung?” he said suddenly, not looking from the ground as they continued their walk.

“What’s up Minie?” Hyunjae asked casually and Minho groaned out loud, once again annoyed with the use of the nickname.

As if he could read Minho’s thoughts the older boy chuckled, placing an arm around him. “Get over it Minie. I’m going to call you that until we die and then some.”

Minho decided it was no use arguing and accepted his fate. He turned towards his hyung slightly, his brown eyes curious. “What do you know about Felix?”  

Hyunjae’s own eyes widened slightly as he was caught off guard. “As in Lee Felix?” he seemed to ponder the question a bit more as he placed his hand on his chin in thought. “I don’t know Minie….I mean he just started at the factory 3 months ago? He is a little weird, but other than that nothing out of the ordinary I’d say.” He peered at Minho “Why do you ask?”

Minho shrugged “I’m not really sure myself…. I guess I just was curious.”

Hyunjae grabbed Minho’s cheek and cooed at him “Aww! Does my Minie have a crush?” Minho scoffed in response and moved his hand away. “As if! I’m just curious about the guy!” Hyunjae chuckled but the smile seemed to fade from his face as his eyes glassed over like he was thinking back to an old memory.

“I don’t know the guy personally, he wouldn’t give me the chance. But… I remember one of his first days. I asked him how he was adjusting to Spector. He was completely fine. And then I made the mistake of asking him about his hometown. For a split second I could suddenly see unbearable sadness in his eyes. But before I could ask what’s wrong he excused himself and disappeared the rest of the day. My guess is that the guy has had a rough life up until now.”

Humming in response, Minho suddenly felt guilty for asking. Hyunjae for all that he is has only ever wanted to take care of people. Especially those younger than him. He probably wants nothing more than to become friends with Felix and help him through whatever shit he is going through but alas not everyone likes to accept that help. And Hyunjae hates it. That is just who he is. And yet, Minho can’t help but think back to yesterday and how he saw with his own eyes Felix’s personality split. He acted so bubbly at the park, but when talk of The Order came up, Minho for the first time realized that he could never quiet see the smile reach his eyes when they spoke. There was sadness in Felix, just like there was sadness in himself.

“Maybe I’ll invite him to eat with us today”

Hyunjae hummed in approval before flicking Minho in the forehead lightly. “Dumbass there won’t be a lunch break if you don’t pick up the pace.”

“Why are you attacking me like this?” Minho groaned dramatically holding his head in pain. “We are here.”

The walked into the building was as ordinary as any other work day, but Minho felt the hair’s on the back of his neck stand up immediately. There was tension in this building. And a lot of it. He silently cursed his over sensitive empathy for those around him and looked to Hyunjae who mirrored his worry. His brows were furrowed down and he grabbed out for Minho’s arm. “Stay close Minie. Something isn’t right”

Minho gulped and nodded, not daring to speak.

The two of them made their way through the hallways until they came across the open space of the production floor and Minho stomach dropped at the sight before him.  

There, lined up in a single row were all his co-workers and friends. Standing in front of them however, were a bunch of suits who all wore the symbol of The Order’s watch dogs on their forehead. Agents

“Jiwon. What the hell is this?” Hyunjae demanded.

At the sound of his voice, their boss Jiwon, with this pulled back black hair turned and looked at the pair, irritation plain as day on his face. “Doesn’t matter! Just get in Line!” he hissed. They both did as they were told, getting into line next to a guy that Minho couldn’t remember the name to but knew he was a quiet guy with no real qualms. Once they both stood still, Minho squinted his eyes to see an induvial stand out from the Agents, as he was much shorter than the others, but held twice as much power in his gaze. He ran his hand over his bald head like he was annoyed.

“Now that everyone is here we can begin.” His voice was like nails on a chalkboard to Minho and suddenly he wanted the man to shut his mouth. “My name is Kwangsoo, and I bet you are all wondering why you have not started the Shift for the day.” he began to walk down the line, looking at each individual intently. “Well…The Order put me in charge of defectors and other rebels to keep our streets safe. And today” he paused, looking at the mass of people “I am here to tell you that one of your fellow workers here is a member of the extremely violent terrorist group S-K-Z!”

Hushed voices exploded in the line as workers as they whispered quickly to one another.

“S-K-Z?” he heard one voice murmur “You mean THAT radical extremist group that has been fighting against The Order here in Spector?”

“I heard that one of their men killed at least 20 agents last week in an explosion”

“They can’t be that stupid to thing they can fight against The Order.”

Minho jumped slightly as he felt Hyunjae grab his hand, holding tightly, his gaze unreadable.

“It’s true!” the short man continued, holding up two objects too small for Minho to see. “We found this pin, the pin of said terrorist group along with this piece of carbon steel. Last time I checked due to the rules of our great leaders only the factory workers, and military personal get to handle such fine metal.” He sneered at Jiwon who just stared back in anger “and last time I checked you were the only Carbon steel factory in Spector.” He began to spin the small object in their air while whistling. “So I’ll give you one chance to give yourself up and we will take you to headquarters where The Order will punish you accordingly.”

Dead silence filled the room.

“Orrrrrrr” he began, nodding towards the Agents who immediately pulled out guns, pointing them at the scared crowd “I can start executing your friends”

Minho froze, his brain stopping all thought as he tried to grasp the situation he was currently in. Being at the end of the row, no guns were pointed at him yet, but it was only a matter of time.

Suddenly he felt movement beside him and a squeeze of his hand before the feeling was gone. He looked over and his stomach dropped as he saw Hyunjae step forward, holding his hands up in the air.

“All right you got me.” All eyes and guns changed to the boy as he stared back, his gaze hard.

Minho spurted, knowing full well it was a lie. “H-Hyung! What are you doing?” he hissed.

Hyunjae turned his head slightly at Minho, sadness sparkled in his eyes. He opened his mouth and mouthed the form of an apology to him and Miho felt his knees almost give out as he was reminded of his thoughts from earlier.

That is just who Hyunjae is.

“Oh ho. So the rat exposes himself” Kwangsoo chuckled humorlessly. “Honestly I expected more of a fight. We brought a lot of ammo just for the occasion.”

Hyungjae walked forward until he was a few feet away from the shorter man, and raised his arm over the rest of his fellow factory workers.  “Leave them alone.” He seethed “You have me now. Isn’t that what you wanted?”

“Oh ho!” Kwangsoo “The rat has teeth.” He waved his arm and suddenly all the guns were ready and aimed at Hyunjae’s head. Minho watched as his best friend flinched slightly at the sound. And he found his legs running forward without much thought. “No!”

Minho ran out in front of Hyunjae, placing his body in a way that protected the older boy from the multiple guns aimed in his direction. The shorter agent smiled, like he was expecting this to happen. “Looks like there is someone stupider than you rat.”

He felt Hyunjae’s body tense and immediately Minho was pushed off of him. “Minho what the hell are you doing!?”

“What the hell am I doing? What the hell are you doing?!” he yelled back, tears threatening to fall down. “We both know you aren’t a member of some terrorist group! Why are you lying?!”

“You don’t know anything Minho!” he hissed back. Hyunjae looked back at Kwangsoo, his momentary break in character over, and his eyes held strength again.  “I am a member of the S-K-Z. Kill me if you have to, but leave the others out of it!”

“Why do I suddenly not believe you boy?”

“Hyunjae!-“

“I mean I can kill you both if it helps the situation” Kwangsoo said simply, looking at Minho’s desperate face. There were now guns aimed at both Hyunjae and Minho, and an arm raised to signal the shooters.  Minho could sense Hyunjae was about to charge the man in blind suicidal rage in hopes to spare him, but before anyone could move, there was a rather loud cough behind them.

All attention was turned towards the noise and Minho’s eyes widened as he saw the red hair of a familiar individual step out from the crowd; Felix.

The bright eyed, freckled boy held two types of smiles on his face. The first was a soft, warm smile, directed at Minho and Hyunjae, almost like he was thanking them. The second smile was when he turned to look at Kwangsoo, in an almost smirking like way.

“Hello Pint Sized Agent man! You aren’t gonna shoot either of these guys understand?”

Kwangsoo momentarily froze at the nickname, but recovered himself as he scoffed. “And why the hell am I going to do that?”

Felix walked forward fearlessly, his smirk never leaving his face. “Because if you kill those two, then in the commotion you’ll let the real rat get away.” And Minho watched as he raised a single wrist up to his face, rolling down the sleeves to reveal a tattoo similar to that of the pin. The mark of the S-K-Z.

Kwangsoo smiled evilly, turning his whole body towards Felix.  “Finally, a rat worth killing.”

But before Minho say something in hopes to help his new acquaintance/friend, a rather loud explosion shook the whole factory as the ceiling began to fall down. There were screams everywhere as people began to run out of the danger. He felt Hyunjae immediately grabbed at Minho, telling him to follow him, and follow him he was going to do before turning back to see Kwangsoo aiming a gun at Felix. The agents had all ran away, as did the other workers, but Felix and Kwangsoo stayed still, almost like they were sizing each other up in the midst of the crumbling building.  He felt a weird sense of protectiveness over the younger boy who just sacrificed himself for them and in a weird act of courage he yanked his arm free of Hyunjae’s grasp.

“Go! Help the others!” Minho yelled at Hyunjae. Hyunjae looked like he was about to refused, but the cry of an older man, the man Minho had stood next to broke Hyunjae down and he nodded once at him.

“Lee Minho I swear to god. You get out alive or I will bring you back just to kill you again.”

And with that the two best friends broke apart. Hyunjae running to help his fellow workers, and Minho running to help someone who up until yesterday was just a stranger. Just then, a rather large piece of the ceiling fell on top of one of the machineries, cause another large explosion. Minho’s eyes stung through the dust but he managed to find his way through the clearing.

All of a sudden fire red hair popped up into his view and he ran straight into the boy he had been looking for.

“Felix!”

“Minho hyung?!” Felix hissed “What are you doing!?”

“Saving your dumb ass. Now come on!” He turned towards what was considered the exit and sighed in relief as he watched Hyunjae disappear though it, an injured man at his side. He pulled Felix towards the door. “Come on bef-NO! “

He was interrupted by a loud bang and an immense pain that now was burning in his side, screaming at him. He turned and saw Felix’s eyes wide with shock and it took him all of 3 seconds to realize that Kwangsoo shot at Felix, and that Minho, without even thinking, stood in front of him taking the bullet himself.  Suddenly the realization that he had been shot made the wound scream even more and he doubled over in pain.

“Shit. Shit!” he hear Felix chant over his head. “Minho? Minho can you hear me?!” but Minho’s body was in too much pain from the bullet wound to respond. He opened his eyes briefly to see Kwangsoo being rushed away by some of his agents as blood poured down from his shirt. “Was he shot? Who shot him?”

But the pain broke Minho back down from his thoughts and he started to feel very dizzy, his vision blurring. There were other voices above him, some he recognized, and some he didn’t. They were screaming and he felt a pair of strong arms hoist his body up and began running. His side screamed at him in protest and he tried to break free of whoever was handling him roughly.

“Yah! Stay still!” a harsh voice yelled at him “We are saving you dumb ass!”

“H-Hyunjae hyung” Minho murmured and he felt a pair of soft hands grab his in response, as they continued to run away. “He is okay Minho, he got out. But you have to trust me. We are going to help you” he had never heard a voice so soothing before and soon he felt his body finally give out from the loss of blood, drifting off into a painful unconsciousness.

Well guys. These were the first two chapters. Tell me what you think! I haven’t written something like this since like 2013 so I’m a little rough. I promise as the story gets on my writing will stop sounding so awkward lmfao.

Mini confession: I’m starting to become really whipped for Hyunjae and I don’t even stan The Boyz. (I’m starting to tho)

Lots of other groups will be making appearances as well so stay tuned!

[coeurdastronaute]

Essays in Existentialism: Halloween

"my kid unknowingly tricks or treats at your house and it turns out he's wearing the costume of the character you're famous for playing in film/tv" thank you for the great stories!:)

The street was absolutely inundated with people. All shapes and sizes and ages and levels of joy ran up and down, ringing doorbells and shrieking with joy. Cobwebs hung from palm trees while tall hedges were riddled with skeletons and gigantic spiders and all manner of monsters and creatures.

While the streetlights burned bright orange, different houses had different noises mingling with the joys of the kids and their parents trying to keep them from running all over and into everyone. Parties littered the block, with Monster Mashes and ghoulie songs wafting through open windows and doors and pools.

It was purely orchestrated chaos, driven by kids and the fun that came in a little fear.

“Do we have to do another block?”

“Yes please!” a little voice responded, happily tugging on a hand, carefully lugging a much too full bag of cavities.

With a sigh, Clarke took the first few steps toward the new block while her five year old practically skipped in search of more food.

“We shouldn’t have come to Grandma’s neighborhood. It’s so big,” Clarke complained.

“But Gramma’s friends give out the big candy,” Maddie argued, proving her point.

The real reason they were trick-or-treating in the opulent neighborhood across town was that Clarke had just got off work, and Grandma was babysitting, but her daughter didn’t have to know that. At any point she could, Clarke tried to make the struggle seem effortless. It was a losing war, but she won some battles, even if it meant schlepping up and down long driveways and up and down long blocks of giant mansions.

Her daughter was happy, and that was all she needed.

“This is the last one, and then we’re going back to Grandma’s house. Grandpa will check the candy while we take a bath.”

“I can eat all of my candy?”

“You can eat two pieces.”

“Five pieces?”

“Two.”

“Fine,” her daughter sighed, adjusting the helmet that sometimes slid into her vision. “But you guys can’t eat it all like last year.”

“We won’t,” Clarke lied, standing back as the little astronaut from her favorite movie ventured forward to another door.

Very slowly, as the made it down the final street, the crowds inevitably thinned as dusk settled and the darkness came out more clearly. Wearily, after over sixteen hours in the ER and another one trudging around, the porches graced Clarke with the escape of being out of candy.

“Looks like we’re all done,” she smiled, swinging her daughter’s hand. “Did you have fun? Feels like you got a lot of candy.”

“That one! We still can go to that one,” Maddie pointed to the house on the corner as they finished their loop and tried to return home.

“We don’t--”

With a tug, the precocious little girl was on her way across the street, and her mother could do nothing but agree, because it was ending soon.

The decorations were minimal, but an effort was made. The pumpkin on the front porch was hand-carved and had a very poorly fitting stem, and misshapen eyes, but the house itself was gorgeous. Slowly Clarke followed up the walk while her daughter skipped ahead, eager for her favorite phrase.

“Trick or treat!” she squealed, just as excited the final time as she’d been at the first door.

“Well, this is incredible. You look like--”

“You! You’re… you’re… MOM!” Maddie shrieked just as Clarke climbed the few steps. “It’s Commander Flare! MOM!”

“Okay, don’t yell,” Clarke chided the hopping girl.

She smiled and prepared herself to apologize until she looked up and met very familiar eyes. The problem being only that they were familiar because a certain DVD played non-stop in their house about a badass space crew and their adventure across time and space. A global phenomenon, it was slated to have a sequel in a few months already. Maddie wouldn’t understand what it meant that Lexa Woods was currently smiling at the miniature version of her character, but Clarke sure as hell knew that a megastar was handing out Twizzlers.

“Commander, it is an honor to meet you,” the actress clicked her heels together and saluted, immediately at attention.

Maddie did the same, her hand bumping the large dome around her head as she misjudged how to hup to.

“How has your mission gone tonight? Lots of candy?”

Kindly, Lexa bent down near the little girl, appreciating her costume and smiling at the idea of seeing a little person dressed like herself. It wasn’t that the movie wasn’t particularly meant for kids, but it had some scary aliens in it. Clearly, this one was a badass.

“Yes ma’am, Commander Flare, sir. Are you on a break from your missions to the stars?”

“I am,” she nodded, quite seriously. “Are you thinking about joining Light Force when you get older?”

“I’m already five, but my mom said no until I’m at least nine,” Maddie explained, casting a look back at her mother just to confirm that she still couldn’t enlist for a fictional army unit based in deep space.

“Hmmm,” Lexa nodded, meeting the stranger’s eyes once again, her face changing slightly before it returned to the little girl. “I think your mom is right. But I promise to put in a good word for you. What’s your name?”

“Maddie,” she chirped, all smiles and dimples. “Maddie Finn Griffin.”

“That’s a strong name for a space explorer. Do you eat your vegetables?”

“Sometimes.”

The actress looked over the little astronaut for confirmation and gave her a wink.

“And do you brush your teeth?”

“All the time.”

“And do you help people whenever they need it?”

“Yes.”

“Do you listen to your mom and dad no matter what?”

“I listen to my mom. I don’t have a dad.”

Slightly taken by surprise with that answer, Lexa furrowed for a second and regained her composure after sharing another look with the amused mother who instantly went into panic mode. To think of her daughter and the situation Finn left her with… it was sometimes too much.

“Well, that still counts,” Lexa promised, deep and honest. “I’ll send my report along to Fleet Commander.”

“Mom! Did you hear that? I can go to Mars!” Maddie smiled, her own jack-o-lantern smile of missing teeth glowing brighter than any other that night.

“When you’re nine,” Lexa reminded her. “In fact,” she whispered, “I think twelve is the cut off, but I’ll try to pull some strings for you.”

“Would you? Promise?”

“Of course,” she nodded, finally standing up. “It’s nice to meet a fellow explorer.”

“Thanks for… that,” Clarke nudged her head toward her daughter who stared intently at her hero in the flesh. “I’m Clarke.”

“Lexa.”

With an extension of her hand, the actress made Clarke come into the light on the porch to shake it, and she faltered slightly when she realized what she was looking at. For a moment too long, they shook hands, holding onto each other while looking back and forth into each other’s eyes.

“I swear, we didn’t know you lived--”

“No, no, I know,” she dismissed it, finally letting her hand drop. “It’s Halloween. I haven’t see a better one of my costume though. Did you make it?”

“It’s her favorite movie. I could do it from memory with how many times we’ve watched it.”

“Wow,” Lexa nodded, looking once again at the little girl who pushed up her visor to look at her with a toothy grin. “Maddie, would you mind taking a picture with me? I’d love to show the rest of the group.”

“Can I, Mommy?”

“If you want,” Clarke nodded.

Instantly, she earned approval, and Lexa picked up the five year old and fished in her pocket to hand over her phone.

“This is the best night of my life,” Lexa sighed contentedly.

“Count of three say cheese. One, two, three!”

The chorus rang out and Clarke snapped a few different ones before Lexa put her daughter back on the ground.

“I know your mom might get mad at me for this, but…” with another wink, something Clarke was becoming incredibly angry about because who in the hell actually did that and how in the hell did it actually work, she slide the rest of her candy bowl into Maddie’s waiting candy bag. “You’re not only my last customer, your my best one, and my trainer will thank you from stopping me from gorging and watching monster movies.”

“What do you say?” Clarke prodded as her daughter leaned back against her, happy and bashful and overwhelmed and tired.

“Thank you, Commander.”

“You, are very welcome,” the actress offered with another salute. “Be good out there.”

“Yes, sir!”

“Thank you for this, seriously,” Clarke sighed. “I can’t imagine a better ending.”

“If you want, I could send you the picture, and you could have it, for her or you, or whatever,” Lexa offered, the mysterious bravado she had when performing for a five year old all but dried up. She scratched the back of her neck and swallowed, avoiding Clarke’s eyes until the last minute.

“Yeah, yeah, of course, I’d love that.”

“Cool, cool,” she nodded, fiddling quickly with her phone before handing it over for Clarke to enter her information. “So you live in the neighborhood?”

“My mother does,” Clarke explained. “We decided bigger houses meant bigger candy, and I just got off work.”

“I thought it was a costume,” she grinned, nudging her chin toward Clarke’s outfit.

“Nope, I’m a doctor over at General,” she nodded, embarrassed slightly by her dark scrubs. “Busy day today, so I came straight from work.”

Maddie busied herself staring at the actress and rummaging through her own candy bag in search of her five treats she would have after her bath. Clarke handed back the phone and Lexa glanced at it before smiling.

“Must be nice to have a built in back up plan.”

“Doesn’t hurt,” she grinned.

“I can’t imagine.”

An awkwardness settled between them, and neither really knew how to address it, so they blushed and cleared their throats and shifted their weight back and forth.

“Mommy, can Commander Flare come home with us?”

“Yes, can I?” Lexa smiled, wide and innocent.

Clarke found herself stuck with two sets of puppy dog eyes and no real defense against it.

“The Commander has a busy night and monster movies to watch. Maybe another time.”

“I’ll hold you to it,” she taunted.

“You have my number,” Clarke shrugged. “Come on, baby. Say thank you again.”

“Happy Halloween, Commander,” Maddie waved as they made their way back into the street and the remaining stragglers from the river of exhausted trick-or-treaters.

“Happy Halloween,” Lexa waved back, empty candy bowl in her other hand as she watched the most peculiar twosome walk away, and suddenly feeling very different about it.