#my first was ponyo!! when i was a kid i had a best friend who had a japanese step dad and he'd give us CDs of these <3 (also damn just

[latejulys]

something about early july born befriending late july born hehe 😋 it's soulmatism, SO REAL THO shizuku's character is so relatable it made me feel seen </3 the whole seiji and shizuku being inspiration and motivation to e/o everything about this movie is so- and i found it at the perfect time too 😭 i don't remember what made me choose it, was going through the ghibli synopsis and woth stuck out to me <3 it's also the first ever ghibli movie i watched so that's also why it's v close to me

your meme game is so strong it never fails to make me laugh irl 😭😭😭

[stardustizuku]

The Avatar of Mestionora

~ Rozemyne Playlist || The Commoner Daughter of a Soldier turned Goddess

(This is a bit of a different playlist format. I wanted to add an explanation on why I included the songs. It’s sort of a huge post so feel free to just listen to the playlist if you’re not into that.

I’ve only read till Part5V7 so the last songs are more vague and less specific abt plot points)

Naughty - Matilda

This song is Myne at her most childish, her most inexperienced. Just as Matilda, her only context to interpret the world is through books. Referring Jack and Jill, Romeo and Juliet, or Cinderella.

She finds constant infuriation at the state of the world and desperately wants to change it - but unable to do much. Through her own “naughtiness” she attempts to change the world one invention at a time “We’re told we have to do as we’re told, but surely…Sometimes you have to be a little bit naughty”

Yes, she causes trouble. But even that is a necessary evil to make her life better.

Despite it all she ends the song with a very firm “But no one else is gonna put it right for me, no one else but me is gonna change my story. Sometimes you have to be a little bit Naughty” She will change things. Even if it lands her in trouble, she will make her books. Because if she doesn’t, no one else will.

Ponyo On the Cliff By the Sea - Noah Cyrus & Frankie Jonas

This mostly focuses on her relationship with Lutz. Or more importantly, how he sees her. It’s meant to highlight her attitude, more naive and cute - and yes. Childish. That of a well meaning but ultimately troublesome kid.

I particularly like the lyrics “Maybe I might love you, maybe I might love you. So hold on tight and hold me close, you’re my hero”. It’s mostly directed at Lutz, who she clung for so long as a best friend and ally.

Flowers in my Hair - Wes Reeves

This is a song I’ve used in other playlist.

This is to reference the hairpins that Myne makes and then uses as Rozemyne. They’re connected to her day as a commoner and how they remind her of her sister and her mother.

“Flowers in my hair make me wish you were here” those are her hairpins. And everytime she wears them, she shall remember Tuli and when she first made them.

“I had a dream of a boy who loved me and we danced in the leaves of an orange tree […] Then I went my own way, and you crossed the highway” Its a song that represents her connection to them yet inevitably the fact she’s gonna be separated.

This is the conclusion of part 1

When I Grow up - Matilda

As I’ve said before, to me, it sounds like Tuli, Lutz, Freida and Myne talking abt how they want to grow up to achieve their dreams. All of them dreaming of silly and simple things.

Yet, this is the first moment Ferdinand is also introduced. This is through Ms Honey singing “When I grow up I will be strong enough to fight the creatures that you have to fight beneath the bed each night to be a grown up” which is how he felt at the beginning of the story. Feeling as if it’s impossible to fight off Veronica or get rid of the High Bishop.

Then, Myne replies with the lyrics interrupts “Just because you find that life’s not fair, doesn’t mean that you just have to grin an bear it […] If I think the ending is fixed already, I might as well be saying I think that it’s okay. And that’s not right” which is a callback to the very first song.

While at the beginning it was a call to make books and defend herself, it would eventually morph into smth to say to Ferdinand. A call for him to stop accepting fate and fight. Even in part5.

Quiet - Matilda

This is the song in which Myne finds out she has the Devouring and tries to explain it. I like descriptions of the overwhelming sensation she can’t control, and trying to keep it in. Just for it to end up coming out as magic.

The lyrics “I’m not sure But I wonder if inside my head I’m not just a bit different from some of my friends. These answers that come into my mind unbidden. These stories delivered to me fully written” it’s a way to symbolize how hard it is to know - is Myne weird bcs she’s Urano or because she is Myne?

Once Upon a December - Christy Altomare

This is for when Ferdinand searches for Myne’s memories of Urano. Her explaining how she misses her days on Modern Japan, and yearns to go back to her mom, although knowing full well she’ll never be able to do as much.

She would often describe her memories as “Far away, Long ago, Glowing dim as an ember, Things my heart Used to know Things it yearns to remember”

Go Tonight - Krystina Alabado & Emma Hunton

The song is about loss. About Lutz/Tuli losing Myne. This helplessness about watching someone bigger and brighter than you, be forced apart from you.

It’s mostly Lutz/Tuli’s regret about how Myne was constantly pushing for them to do things. Become a merchant, become a Gilberta Seamstress. They followed her, and her crazy surreal ideas. But at some point that someone is lost.

The parts were you hear “if we’re wanna go, we gotta go tonight” is Rozemyne trying to get them to do what they want, and dragging them along her own adventures. It’s a bittersweet memory of someone bigger than the whole sky.

“When I was your orbit. And you were my star. But now you’re a black hole and I am left numb from the loop of these memories”

Two Orugitas - Sebastian Yatra

Two Orugitas talks about how our families eventually get separated by forces bigger than us, and we have to move on.

In specific, it talks abt how two orugitas, despite loving each other so much, must grow distant - separate - in order to become butterflies.

That’s essentially what happens at the end of Part 2. Myne gets separated from her family.

“Don’t look behind you, fly ‘til you find your way toward tomorrow. Ay, mariposas, don’t you hold on too tight. Both of you know it’s your time to go, to fly apart, to reunite”

Chiquitita - ABBA

Chiquitita means “little girl”, mostly referring to how small (physically) the person is. It’s an endearment mostly used by mothers to call their young daughters.

This is a song where the singers is constantly consoling their “chiquitita”. The singer sees them cry, but knows they’re far stronger than that. They tell their “chiquitita” how much they would rather see them sing.

It’s very obvious this is about Effa consoling Myne just as she’s leaving.

“Chiquitita, you and I cry. But the sun is still in the sky and shining above you. Let me hear you sing once more like you did before. Sing a new song, Chiquitita. Try once more like you did before”

Class of 2013 - Mitski

“Mom, I’m tired. Can I sleep in your house tonight? Mom, is it alright if I stay for a year or two?”

The Milk Carton - Madilyn Mei

This song abt a lost cat, yearning to go back home. It feels a lot like Myne just after she became Rozemyne. Desperately wanting to go back home, but no longer able to do so.

“I think I really miss my bed. Oh when, oh when will the nightmare end? I had it good, I had it good and yet I left and can’t retrace my steps”

But also having to brace herself for the dangers that come ahead in Part 3, with the lyrics “You’re gonna be eaten by a coyote. Run, little one, though the pack may follow. Two quite thin, their brother fatter. You can still win, just gotta be faster”

The last sentence driving home how a false move could kill her. She has to best faster, smarter, if she wants to win this race. It’s a strange and confusing song - just like Rozemyne feels

Family Jewels - MARINA

This entire song functions as Rozemyne’s brutal introduction to the world of nobles. Expected to fit into a role she was not born for, and to treat strangers like family.

I like the lyrics “Did I beat you at your own game? Typical of me to put us all to shame” as way for Rozemyne to retort to Wilfred during their first confrontation. To highlight how she’s often blamed by him, despite always trying to help.

Also the lyrics “Welcome to the family jewels. Coal to diamond, sold to fools” A commoner to a noble, sold to people who don’t fully grasp her potential.

She Used To Be Mine - Jessie Mueller

This one’s perfect for Rozemyne at the height of her depression for being a noble and fearing losing those she loves.

The song talks abt how the person singing has lost herself. How she once used to be a positive but reckless person but now is anything but. She mourns who she used to be, and how she’ll never be that again.

It fits Rozemyne, essentially mourning “Myne”, and the life she had as a commoner, with the words “She is messy but she’s kind. She is lonely most of the time. She is all of this mixed up and baked in a beautiful pie. She is gone but she used to be mine”

Belle - Beauty&Beast Cast

This one marks the beginning of Part4 and how people see Rozemyne upon entering the Royal Academy. Essentially a beauty, but a strange one, only interested in book.

“[…] That girl is so peculiar, I wonder if she’s feeling well. With a dreamy, far-off look and her nose stuck in a book. What a puzzle to the rest of us is Belle”

I can just imagine the looks of the other nobles as she runs around doing crazy thing after the other. Plus, Gaston’s bits can be interpreted as Lestilaut’s hints to her advancements.

Ancient Dreams in a Modern Land - MARINA

I like to see this song as Rozemyne’s interconnection of her former self Rozemyne and Urano.

“What’s your purpose? Why were you put on Earth? You could be lost, but you belong to the world” is interpreted as Rozemyne wondering why she’s been put in this world as Myne. Despite it all, she has to come to accept her place in this world.

“Ancient Dreams in a Modern Land, I’m trying to get back as fast I can. Back to a time before I had form. Back to a time before I was born” as in, she brings the stories from before she was born as Myne into the world of Rozemyne. She wants those inventions to help this world.

“You don’t have to be like everybody else. You don’t have to fit into the norm. You are not here to conform” is her willingness to push her strange ideas into the Royal Academy “I am here to take a look inside myself. Recognize that I could be the eye, the eye of the storm” is her recognition that she may be doing things off the book, but unable to stop - because that’s just how she is.

Téir Abhaile Riu - Celtic Woman

This is a song about arranged marriages. It’s an Irish folk song abt how a girl returns from a dance just to find her match has been made, and she debates if she should go through or not.

It’s supposed to be Rozemyne’s engagement with Wilfred.

“Go home with you, go home with you, go home with you, Mary. Go home with you and stay at home, because your match is made”

Fine On The Outside - Priscilla Ahn

This is upon losing her secret room. How had to learn how to look fine on the outside, cause never again could she let herself be vulnerable in front of Lutz and Benno inside her secret room.

“So I learned to be Ok with just me, just me, just me, just me. And I’ll be fine on the outside” to me it’s exceptionally heart breaking how she had to spend her last moments with Lutz pretending to be fine, just to stop him from worrying

How she had to learn to be alone and pretend to be fine on her own.

There’s also the lyrics “So I just sit in my room after hours with the moon And think of who knows my name” and really, who does? Is she Urano? Is she Myne? Or Rozemyne? At that point, who knows.

Francis Forever - Mitski

Yes, this is the moment she loses Ferdinand. I think it fits a lot. It’s a genuine song about yearning, about wanting someone not to leave you.

“I don’t need the world to see that I’ve been the best I can be, but I don’t think I could stand to be where you don’t see me” fits her cause she very much does not care for how others perceive her, she only wants to stay with her family. She just wants Ferdinand to still be by her side.

And I adore the lyrics “And autumn comes when you’re not yet done with the summer passing by”.

Ferdinand was set to marry Detlinde and leave Ehrenfest on Summer. But due to the illness of the Aub, he was told to leave in autumn. Alternatively, it can be interpreted abt how she was taken too soon from him.

Warrior of the Mind - Jorge Rivera-Herrans & Tegan Earley

Part 5 starts with Hartmut declaring that Rozemyne is, in fact, more than a Saint and closer to a goddess. This is the song perfect for that.

This is his exact reaction, assuring a very confused and skeptical Rozemyne, that she is the reincarnation of Mestionora.

“So let’s be honest, you are Athena! Badass in the arena. Unmatched, witty, and queen of The best strategies we’ve seen”

Idol - YOASABI

This is perfect for the image that Rozemyne portrays to the Royal Academy. An “idol” someone so perfect, but with so many secrets it’s hard to know her true intentions. “So unconcerned, although you brightly glow. Any seemingly unveiled secrets are as sweet as honey”.

Venus Fly Trap - MARINA

I love love love this one for Rozemyne - it’s literally her relationship with Dunkelferg in a nutshell.

It starts with Rozemyne clearly explaining that she does not work the same way other nobles would with “I never quite fit in to that Hollywood thing. I didn’t play that game for the money or the fame I did it my way, baby”

Then upon playing ditter with them, it shifts to “Don’t underestimate me 'Cause one day you’re gonna see you’re in a losing battle” because she throughly beat them in a game they were supposed to be the best at.

Also I can just imagine when the Aub was talking abt how much her “hobby book” was worth and Rozemyne answered with 15 large golds, this:

“I know that money ain’t important. And it don’t mean you’re the best But I earned it all myself and I’m a millionairess”

And when Lestilaut wanted Rozemyne he could only see her “I got the beauty, got the brains, got the power, hold the reins” and upon the Bride Stealing Ditter talk:

“They’ll shame you, blame you, pretend to even hate you. Take away your rights, pacify you with their lies” is how she sees the way that talk went. Dunkelferg stopping at nothing to get her hand in marriage.

Finally, the part of “Why be a wallflower when you can be a Venus Fly trap?” Is how as Urano she WAS a wallflower.

But by the time she plays the Bride Stealing Ditter, she is absolutely a Venus Flytrap.

Everybody Wants To Rule The World - Lorde

I like this version more than the original. The og has this whimsical tone. As if the fact that the “everyone wants to rule the world” is a childish but harmless statement. It’s way more cheerful.

Lorde’s version frames the same sentence as a selfish and cruel act. How everyone feels fit to rule, but rarely anyone fits the crown.

The most important lyrics “Help me make the most of freedom, and of pleasure. Nothing ever lasts forever. Everybody wants to rule the world” in the og, it’s very happy and dream like.

Lorde’s version it’s filled with a determination that feels akin to hatred. With the last words being almost spit out with a sarcasm undertone.

This reflects the royalty’s desire to rule, feeling as if they’re fit to do as much - but in Rozemyne’s eyes their senseless desire makes them the least fit.

Seventeen - MARINA

This particular song is on of my fav. Specially on how, Wilfred and other men start to see Rozemyne as a piece for political marriage, wanting her to marry.

But Rozemyne was raised with a mentality that refuses to bow and act like a wife. And anyone who feels embarrassed by her or cannot accept her for what she is, does not truly understand all the pain she’s gone through to be where she is

“Could never tell you what happened: The day I turned seventeen. The rise of a king and the fall of a queen”

It’s also a very good representation of how other men see her as a price but rarely seem to realize both how powerful she can be.

“You’re a rich little boy who’s had to work for his toys. You’ve got all the sensibilities of an upper class guy”

Or when Wilfred was utterly stressed out about how she kept making problem. Or angry that she wasn’t acting like a proper first wife

“Oh, you are embarrassed of me ‘Cos I use my tongue freely. Bet you wish I couldn’t speak ‘Cos when I do, you know I tell you why you’re being weak” she’s very much quick to call him out and coddle him.

My particular favorite line is when Wilfred tries to imply that she’s too bad to rule because of how she was raised.

“I felt you question the way I was brought up as a baby. Well you don’t know fuck about my family”

Labour - Paris Paloma

This song is meant to symbolize the archduke conference, and how Eglantine and Anastasuis were dumping all of the royal’s issues into Rozemyne.

The way she swallowed it all down, doing as they asked, unable to voice exactly what was going through her head…They not only tasked her to do the impossible and find the Bible - but also to solve their problems. It was a silent moment of pure rage, that couldn’t be voiced.

“The capillaries in my eyes are bursting. If our love died, would that be the worst thing? For somebody I thought was my savior, you sure make me do a whole lot of labour”

With the “love died” being the trust she stopped having on Eglatine and Anastasius after their little stunt.

Don’t Make Me - MALINDA

This is essentially seconds before her confrontation with Sisgwald. The subtle threat of perhaps not doing things as necessarily okay as she used to. It comes right after Labour since, given that Royals have successfully “killed” any affection or “love” that Rozemyne had for them.

Therefore, she decides to change the tactic towards them. Instead of simply agreeing to their demands, she takes the offense.

“I’ve tried to take you lying down. I clarified, tip-toed around. Was innocent, clear and defined. But you cross them every time” She’s telling them that she’s been nothing but nice, yet if they decide to abuse her trust - she has no issue squeezing them dry for all they’re worth. “Paradise lost, you’re fallen from grace” & “I can read you like a book and it’s getting old” perfectly reflect how easy it is for her to as much.

She keeps telling them not to “make her be the bad guy” aka letting her merchant side come out. However, she ends up being forced to do so.

Breakfast - Dove Cameron

The Merchant Saint. This is her confrontation with Sisgwald. How dealing with someone like him, is pretty easy, almost too easy - if they’re on the same level.

“Ooh, so you wanna talk about power? Ooh, let me show you power” is such a thing I can see Rozemyne thinking. Cause while, yes, Sisgwald has more power in the sense he’s royalty…

She has more mana, more money, is closer to finding the Bible they need, and she has the information to keep them on a stalemate.

To drive this home “I eat boys like you for breakfast. One by one hung on my necklace” Yes. She could negotiate with Benno. She was a cutthroat merchant capable of squeezing people for all they’re worth if she wants to.

Of course a pampered prince like Sisgwald would be breakfast for her.

After all, in the end, she won.

Hit Me With Your Best Shot - ADONA

This is mostly how Rozemyne appears in front of the royals after they’ve refused to help Ferdinand.

Threatening them with what she may be able to do if they hurt him. “Hit me with your best shot. Fire away”

The original song is a silly and upbeat song, cause that’s how Rozemyne’s POV is. This one shows the other side of the coin. As how, from the outside, Rozemyne words come off as an actually scary threat.

I mean, Sisgwald was very much scared of her during the negotiating scene.

“You don’t fight fair But that’s okay, see if I care” the Royals very much don’t fight fair, willing to sacrifice Ehrenfest for the sake of the Sovereignty.

“Knock me down, it’s all in vain I get right back on my feet again” because yes, Rozemyne is a relentless and stubborn person. There’s close to nothing that’s capable of stopping her.

Breathe - In The Heights Musical

Breathe is about her having to be adopted by the king.

I see this as Rozemyne with Elvira in her secret room, finally breaking down about how everything’s been taken from her, yet she’s expected to smile and be grateful.

The first part, when Nina is sing abt how her home, it’s Rozemyne reminiscent abt her days as a commoner, and everything she’s had to live through. Then the second part, she feels as if she’s failed to live up to what others asked of her. She’s not strong enough to protect Ferdinand and everyone criticize her for saving him.

“When I was a child I stayed wide awake, climbed to the highest place on every fire escape restless to climb. I got every scholarship. Saved every dollar. The first to go to college” I can just imagine Rozemyne screaming this as she remembers how she started as Myne. Clawing to get money and influence. “How do I tell them why (Respira) I’m coming back home? With my eyes on the horizon” and finally slumping forward, tired. After all, she lost Ferdinand. The family she was meant to protect.

Still she can’t lose hope and must continue to act like a noble, “Straighten the spine, smile for the neighbors. Everything’s fine, everything’s cool. The standard reply, “Lots of tests, lots of papers" Smile, wave goodbye and pray to the sky, oh, god!”

Product of My Own Design - Artio

From here on the songs are less tied to actual plot beats - cause this is as far as I’ve read in the LN. That said, these are more a general vibe or things that I think may happen.

This one in particular is for when Rozemyne finds out what’s happening in Ahrensbach.

I Can just picture her rage upon those who hurt her family/Ferdinand. Letting out her full political power and merchant skills to breakthrough and save him.

“Feel free to have your views, don’t force them all on me. The kid I was back then would never dream of being free” it’s how she pushes back from what noble society has taught her (be it the meaninglessness of commoners or the cutting of ties to those no longer near you)

“Get on your knees and pray to me. The problem child becomes the only god you’ll ever see” a call that others see her as a reincarnation. Yet, she’s fully aware that she is a problem child. It doesn’t matter to her though, when her family is involved. She will interviene and create problems to save them.

“You made me believe that I was never mine. I made my goddamn self, a product of my own design” Rozemyne was made to believe she wasn’t a commoner. Forced to take on the identity of “Rozemyne” The Noble. She had to build herself a new. And if someone puts in jeopardy that which she cares for, she’s more than ready to use what she’s built to fight back.

No Good Deed - Wicked Cast

If something ever happened to Ferdinand, this is how I imagine Rozemyne to react. With pure fury at those who hurt himself. At fate for putting him in harms way. And using every ounce of mana she has get him better.

“Let his flesh not be torn. Let his blood leave no stain. Though they beat him let him feel no pain” is almost like the desperate prayers she always says whenever she feels Ferdinand is in danger. “What good is this chanting? I don’t even know what I’m reading I don’t even know what trick I ought to try” cause she’s desperate enough to try anything for him.

To add to this, the lyrics express how much Rozemyne blames her own naivety and foolishness for putting him in harms way “No good deed goes unpunished. Sure, I meant well. Well, look at what well-meant did”

In general, such a raw and desperate cry begging for the healing of a loved on is very Rozemyne coded.

Safe and Sounds - Taylor Swift

Just seconds or moments after the previous song - this one. Cause I just feel like while anger may over come Rozemyne, she’s someone who is in tune with the emotions of others and herself. Therefore, after the initial pain, she’d hold Ferdinand and reassure him everything would be okay.

That she would fix whatever happened. That she would heal whatever hurt.

“When all those shadows almost killed your light I remember you said don’t leave me here alone. But all that’s dead and gone and passed tonight” if someone were to hurt Ferdinand, she would be the first to say that it’s all gone now. That no one can hurt him.

I’ve always been of the idea that while Ferdinand is more powerful than Rozemyne, emotionally he’s very weak. She’s the one who can actually read him, and the only one who can actually console him. “Don’t you dare look out your window, darling, everything’s on fire. The war outside our door keeps raging on. Hold onto this lullaby even when the music’s gone, gone”

“Just close your eyes. You’ll be alright. Come morning light. You and I’ll be safe and sound”.

Queen of Kings - Alessandra

This is mostly for when Rozemyne eventually gets the Grutrissheit. Therefore, she would be the “queen of the kings” aka, someone capable of (in a way) rule over those who want to be Zent - even if she doesn’t become one herself.

I like this description cause it rings quite similar to Rozemyne’s “Got raven hair, it’s dark as night. Icy eyes, outta sight, outta sight. Her heart, in spite, is warm and bright. Her smile awakes the Northern Light”

Hair as black as night, eyes as bright as light. A kind heart and a beautiful smile.

Once Upon a Dream - Lana del Rey

I know that there’s some time shenanigans going on in the later parts of the novel. I’m guessing at some point it’s revealed that Ferdinand and Myne met before. Likely it has to do with the gods, so I picked this more somber version of the song.

“I know you, I walked with you once upon a dream. I know you, that look in your eyes is so familiar a gleam and I know it’s true that visions are seldom all they seem. But if I know you, I know what you’ll do. You’ll love me at once, the way you did once upon a dream”

I think of Rozemyne staring at Ferdinand eye’s realization suddenly hitting her, crying a bit. Cause yes, Ferdinand would love her once more, as he did once upon a dream.

When you’re home - In The Heights Cast

If Rozemyne ever goes back to the lower city, or to her family, this is the song I can just picture her with.

Lutz as Benny, taking her down memory lane (likely with Ferdinand watching from afar) and reminding her of all the things they used to do and promise.

I can just picture her singing and looking all dreamy at the horizons like “I used to think we lived at the top of the world when the world was just a subway map and the one-slash-nine climbed a dotted line to my place”. It’s her remembering how her apartment used to be at such a high place.

And Lutz laughing, saying “There’s no nine train now” because so many things have changed.

I like the little talk they have, abt how her father would help him hide. It sounds so silly and cute, and just how Lutz and Myne would speak about their childhood.

“And that song you are hearing is the neighborhood just cheering you along” Lutz trying to cheer her up, just for her to break down.

“Don’t say that. Don’t say that! When I was younger, I’d imagine what would happen if my parents had stayed in Puerto Rico” imagining what would happen if she had stayed with them in the lower city.

“Who would I be if I had never seen Manhattan if I lived in Puerto Rico with my people. My people!” If she had stayed with her family. Her commoner family.

“I feel like all my life, I’ve tried to find the answer. Working harder, learning Spanish, learning all I can” how hard she worked to be able to be a noble, to fit in.

“I thought I might find the answer out at Stanford. But I’d stare out at the sea, thinking, where’m I supposed to be?” Her realizing she’s far from home, having lost commoner lifestyle.

“So please don’t say you’re proud of me, when I’ve lost my way” cause she’s done so many things wrong and she’s sorta become lost in the ocean of responsibilities she now has.

Then Lutz chimes in, cheering her up with “Now listen to me! That may be how you perceive it. But Nina please believe that when you find your way again. You’re gonna change the world and then. We’re all gonna brag and say we knew her when”

It’s him telling she did everything right and that even if she feels lost - they will always be family.

What was I made for? - Billie Eillish

I like this song as a question Rozemyne asks herself constantly. What was she brought into this world for?

This is mostly here because I do believe all the trauma she’s endured reflects

[i-am-brandon]

my life story chapter 11

When the Dodgers lose it really affects my brother Travis emotionally I don’t know if it ruins his day. My sister hope didn’t want to watch the movie Ponyo with me 2 times in my life. Did I mention that my grandma was catholic and had a big Mary statue Jesus’s mom in her backyard which seemed ok. My grandpa talks a lot but weirdly enough I like when he talks. But my grandma doesn’t say a lot. I said to my grandma are you catholic. She said 1 word to me and that was yeah. Then she started making food. My grandma makes really good gravy. My grandpa I think he was in world war 2, he said he survived D-Day I don’t know if that’s a lie or not. He doesn’t like to talk about it though. He said people were so good at shooting in world war 2 that they would kill anything that moved even their team mates. I think he said someone to the left of him died instantly. And at some point he had this look in his eyes like he imagined 1 of the worst things ever and he didn’t want to talk about it after that. But if I was gonna talk about it. I would say the ocean was red that day. My grandpa likes craps the dice game. I think i said to him what movie do you wanna watch? This may or may not be the dialogue. My grandpa said Patton there is a movie about that war I think he was 1 of the best war people I don’t know much about him. So yeah I have interest in a lot of what he says. I think he likes to make planes. And I think my grandpa liked to talk about planes. I think my grandpa likes the Kentucky derby. My grandpa likes this 1 comedian called Red Skelton. Let’s see a happy memory I don’t know if it was a log cabin or a snow e cabin I’m not sure what kind of cabin, my family was in a cabin when it was snowing, and I like that memory. 1 of my friend’s back then had a sega genesis, and i think he had the mortal kombat game, the 1st one I think it was, and for some reason i don’t know if i was a kid, so it was a bunch of kids trying to figure out the blood code but nobody figured it out. I think at some point they tried to make the game non violent and it didn’t sell as good, people for some reason wanted the violence. I forgot how sega found a way for mortal kombat I think it was the first 1 to be violent and not violent. Although you had a street fighter 2 fighting video game that didn’t have violence people liked that game. I didn’t try to mimic video games I didn’t want to hurt anyone as a kid. I still don’t want to hurt anyone in the future I should get a body guard. Mortal Kombat 2 had what was known as a babality they put that in the game for the parents instead of a violent finishing move you could turn your opponent into a baby that I believe cried and the game said babality, pronounced babe Al it e. Because the parents didn’t like the violence of mortal kombat, this is 90’s history. You had sonic the hedgehog it’s about a cute little blue hedgehog it’s not violent a lot of these games are jumping on the enemy but no blood sonic was a more family friendly game and this cute little blue hedgehog could run fast. But Mario always did better of the jump on stuff games it’s a game about an Italian plumber who jumps on stuff and he saves the princess from bowser who always tries to kidnap her. I was in the friend zone with a lot of girl’s back then, and I would assume they like the ocean but research now tells me girls like the ocean so now this confuses because in California no one ever went to the beach of beaches no one ever wanted to see the ocean and girls I’m assuming like the ocean, California, this state makes no sense. Rebecca in my teenage years when girls were inappropriate the most you get older and if they are inappropriate it’s not with me and they used to want to talk people don’t talk anymore I don’t get this generation. But anywho Rebecca did she have big boobs I don’t know and she did a dance that was known as the bounce e dance and teenage me was into it, and her sister would show up and be like stop doing that, and Rebecca would say why he likes it. She had clothes on though.

[brideofcthulhu10]

Alright I know, another unrelated post but humor me here, I need to get this off my chest.

I know this won't seem like a huge deal, but knowing this is a show for little girls it just feels so frickin' wrong for so many reasons. Hopefully this can be a warning for other parents/guardians/older siblings as well. Keep in mind I've never ever been a "cancel culture" type person just because something minescule bugs me, nor have I ever been some cliche Karen-style parent bitching to a company about "this is inappropriate so its your fault my kid was watching this!" Rather than take responsibility. I am the parent first and foremost, and yes, once I recognized the inappropriate nature of this I changed it immediately. At first I even thought maybe I was overreacting, I kept watching to see if maybe I was misreading the situation and I found it only got more uncomfortable. So yes, I did turn this off. However, it doesn't excuse that this show is still made for and marketed to little children, particularly little girls (I'm talking between 2 and 13). The purpose of this post is just a warning to other parents or people with younger siblings who may come across this show.

So today, I decided to put on a show called "Flowering Heart" on Netflix for my 3 year old daughter.

Keep in mind when I found this, it wasn't in the teens or adult section, it was on Netflix Kids. Specially the Netflix Kids page. I grew up on anime since I was little, so naturally I wanted to find some cute magical girl shows to introduce to my daughter (pass down the nerd torch).

Granted it appeared harmless enough. A cute magical girl anime from Korea about 3 best friends who meet a magical Prince from a different world, and together through the power of magical makeup compacts and friendship they work together to give people hope and fight the "hopeless energy". Seems cute enough, and I really wanted to introduce my daughter to magical girl shows, a lot of them are great for little girls. So it started off pretty good, even I was warming up to it at first.

AT FIRST.

To give you a little clarity about why I grew to dislike it rather quickly, first of all, the main character is a 5th grade little girl. A 12 year old. Now in some other animes they do have younger children as their leads. Magical Do Rei Mi, Glitter Force, Little Witch Academia, even Ghibli films like Kiki's Delivery Service or Ponyo, that's really nothing too unusual. But here is where I had a huuuge problem:

Her romantic interests? They are two teenage boys.

Yeah. I'm not talking a grade above or something. Supposedly the two male leads are 14 and 16. Even her rival? Also a 12 year old little girl, Shuela, who just so happens to be engaged to one of the magical princes (literally named Prince Trump) and is in love with him. The main character, Ari, joins her two best friends Suah and Min fight the unseen meddling of Shuela trying to create "hopeless energy".

By transforming into fully grown women.

Yes, you heard right. These twelve year old little girls are able to transform into fully grown, adult women who take the power of whatever makeup disguise they use (ie police officer, stewardess, life guard, pop idol, etc.) that varies based on the emergency of the episode (mostly situations like a figure skater who lost her motivation, or her friend is having a hard time babysitting).

This also includes several romantic interactions with our lead Ari, and her object of affections, Prince Trump.

Prince Trump, mind you, is completely aware that Ari is secretly this "adult". He knows she's a 12 year old, and actively flirts with her.

At first I thought it was a little weird the boys appeared older than the girls. I thought maybe it was just a style choice, that they were closer in age than I thought- nope. Teenage boys. I mean they don't even try to hide the age difference by making them shorter or making the girls look older like Sailor Moon (who was 14 at the start). No.

These girls look and act like 6 year olds, including their very childish outfits to make them appear even younger- despite being 12. Meanwhile these boys act, sound, and appear to be in their twenties.

Maybe I could just ignore it, suppress the utter nasty of it all and just enjoy them kicking butt as magical girls if the romance itself was an after thought. Oh no no no! You see, this is the main focus of the anime!

A love triangle (er, square) between two ALMOST ADULT MEN and two 5th grade girls (and yes, they do clarify these girls are in 5th grade and that these boys are 17).

This extends to the other male love interest, Prince Chess, who jumps from being a chubby blue hamster dubbed "Tubby" who lives in the main leader's bedroom, and a very attractive teen boy. Now he is no better, including blushing when he holds hands with Ari, and being jealous of his brother Trump when Ari goes on the ferris wheel with him. Even commenting his cotton candy didn't taste sweet anymore because she had a crush on his brother. This wasn't "he met her in her magical girl form and fell in love but doesn't realize she's a child". Both boys met her while a child, and both boys are aware even in this magically made adult body, she is actually an underage girl.

Its just-EUGH! The more I watched it the more the situation dawned on me how nasty it was. They don't play it like a cute crush or just a fling (like how in Kodocha, Sana thought her bodyguard was in love with her, but he made it very clear he's an adult and that's not appropriate). Again wrong. This is portrayed as a serious romance.

I seriously don't get why they didn't make them late middle school or high school age?! Why a bunch of elementary students are being romantically shipped with high schoolers?! It really is a shame, because the art is very cute and pretty, hell most of the characters are pretty likeable with decently done voice acting. (Granted the plot drags on for a while) But I seriously cannot get past these underage children being romanticized with teenage guys. I'm amazed that's even on Netflix and Amazon Prime! So yeah, take it with a grain of salt if you'd like, I know there's gonna be some who disagree with me because the reviews have been very split down the middle (some adore this show, others say it's obviously inappropriate), I myself am still very mixed about it as it was a good show up until this main issue (I didn't even get to the love rival almost letting a child DROWN so she could collect the "hopeless energy"). If you disagree and enjoy this show, more power to you I guess(?), this is really just to give a heads up if you or someone you know have kids and were thinking about putting this on. My advice? Just opt for Magical Doremi or Hamtaro instead.

[agentnico]

Luca (2021) Review

Honestly, after seeing The Shape of Water where a woman copulates with a fish, I don’t see why there now any need for a film about accepting sea monsters. If we’re mating with them anyway we’re basically passed all the bases, right? Right??

Plot: A young boy experiences an unforgettable seaside summer on the Italian Riviera filled with gelato, pasta and endless scooter rides. Luca shares these adventures with his newfound best friend, but all the fun is threatened by a deeply-held secret: he is a sea monster from another world just below the ocean's surface.

Pixar’s last movie that they released was Soul. That film was absolutely phenomenal and arguably one of their best from their entire film library. It was its earnest and profound message of learning to enjoy the little things that makes it so touching to the, ahem, soul. So Luca never stood a chance at topping the heights of Pixar’s last entry, however Pixar being Pixar you still expect there to be a certain class and quality to the procedures. Expect for Cars 2. Remember Cars 2? It was like a Michael Bay film had a baby with Hello Kitty, with simultaneously talking down to the audience like they were 6 years old (adults watch Pixar films too ya know!!) while having forced action set pieces that felt like they were thought of first and then the rest of the plot was meant to justify their existence. So yes, just like Michael Bay. Also, doesn’t a car voiced by Bruce Campbell get burned to death in that movie? Pretty dark for such a kids friendly motion picture! Anyway, enough with the Cars 2 hate! I mean, not enough with the hate, I hope Reddit keeps annihilating that thing till the end of days, I’m just stating enough with the hate in this review, as I’m supposed to be talking about Luca and pasta Alfredo’s and Vespa's. 

Luca is evidently heavily inspired by Studio Ghibli films with Hayao Miyazaki’s signature style present in spirit in both plot and animation. The clear, blue-green seas, lush vegetation, idyllic village life, blue skies and giant white clouds: this is Miyazaki territory. Honestly if Pixar did the animation in 2D then Disney would have probably received a lawsuit from the Ghibli folks for copyright infringement and rightly so! Wait a minute.... *rustles through some Google pages* hang on, Disney bought Studio Ghibli?! By mermaid’s tale, they are literally buying out everything!! Ah, wait a minute again *further rustling* they don’t own them anymore. Some GKIDS company have them now instead. Phew, was about to lose my timbers on this one.  Anyway, ownership rights and capitalist bureaucracy aside, we have ourselves a Disney’s Miyazaki film! Similarities to the likes of Ponyo, Kiki’s Delivery Service and Porco Rosso are sprinkled throughout, with the latter even getting a near full on shout out with Luca’s village named “Portorosso” in homage. However Luca never reaches the heights of Ghibli’s greatest. Nor the heights of Pixar’s own for the matter of fact. The plot feels both muddled and over simplistic and also lacks enough exposition. Look, I’m usually the first to complain when a film has too much exposition, but here is the rare occurrence of the opposite. For example, it is never explained nor questioned how nor why these sea creatures are able to turn into humans when reaching the surface. There’s no origin to it and I’m sorry, it seems like quite a big thing not to explain. Also, everything that happens in this movie feels all too convenient. There’s no natural flow in the story progression, instead things just happen cause they need to happen for the film to reach from point A to Z. The film’s main villain is this Vespa driving Italian who’s entire personality is ‘to be a dipshit’, excuse my French. That’s it. There are zero layers to him and, again, no explanation to why he is such a prick; all that is stated is the evident fact that he is a prick. 

Luca has its lovely moments and the central kid characters are all well done and have plenty of personality/chemistry, though I must disappoint Call Me by Your Name fans, they don’t do what you expect them to do. As a whole though this movie is pleasant to look at, comes as a given with Pixar, but when it comes to the narrative I expected more. Still enjoyable nonetheless and if you have Disney+ anyway then there is no harm to watch it.

Overall score: 6/10

[tilbageidanmark]

Movies I watched this week - 50 

The Hand of God, my third Paolo Sorrentino’s film (After ‘The Great Beauty’ and ‘Youth’). Sheer movie making delights from the new Fellini, like current Amarcord but for Napoli in 1984, the year Maradona was transferred there. Interesting that the young protagonist is listening to his Walkman throughout, but we never find out what he’s listening to. Superb - 9/10.

✴️    

2 (and again) by Hiromasa Yonebayashi:

✳️✳️✳️ Yonebayashi worked for Ghibli for 18 years before leaving in 2014 to establish his own Studio Ponoc. It is obvious that he sees himself as heir apparent to Hayao Miyazaki, and deservedly so. Mary and the Witch’s Flower is the first film he directed there.

A psychedelic fairy tale about another young girl who becomes a witch combines the emotional twists from ‘Spirited Away’, basic story from ‘Kiki’s Delivery Service’ and Ponyo’s magic, together with Harry Potter adventures. The animation kept changing unexpectedly at least 10-15 times into new, phantasmagorical styles. Highly creative!

Together with ‘The Secret World of Arrietty’, I’ve now seen all three films he directed. One of my best movies of the year!

✳️✳️✳️ When Marnie Was There, seeing it once again after just one week. "I missed you. I kept calling you in my heart." Just beautiful.

✴️    

Antonioni’s 1960 rule-breaker L'Avventura. Visually & stylishly innovative, I loved the early part on the island, as Monica Vitti is looking for her disappeared friend. But I didn’t ‘get’ the changing focus of the story, as it moves later into the empty, doomed attraction between her and her friend’s former lover. (Photo Above).

✴️    

2 With Adrien Brody, Fisher Stevens AND Larry Pine: 

✳️✳️✳️ Season 3 of Succession, a modern day ‘Dallas’, about a despicable ‘King Lear’ mogul and his mediocre four kids. Tedious, brutal and fascinating dive into the depravity of greed, power and abuse. This repetitive season continued with the complete disintegration of ‘Dark Prince’ Kendall Roy, and of patriarch Roy Logan who keeps assuring that his children hate one another just enough to never take sides against him. Why is it so compelling to watch, when it’s clear from the get go that all four heirs are too incompetent to take over the father’s role?

“I’ve seen you get fucked a lot, and I’ve never seen Logan get fucked once...”

✳️✳️✳️ The French Dispatch of the Liberty, Kansas Evening Sun, Wes Anderson’s intellectual homage to The New Yorker magazine and to the mid-centrury Paris of Jacques Tati. It’s a really good movie for people who like that sort of movies.

(For me, I still can’t stand Owen Wilson). 6/10

✴️    

I’m going to go through the Steven Soderbergh‘s films I missed up to now. First watch: The Limey, a standard crime story with Terence Stamp, which unusually flashes back to scenes from ‘Poor Cow’, a much earlier Stamp film done by Ken Loach. 3/10.

✴️    

I Was at Home, But, an award-winning, SUPER-slow German film directed by Angela Schanelec, of the “First wave Berlin School”. The puzzling story of a grief-stricken, single mother with two kids struggling to keep it together two years after her husband died. It starts with a static, long shot of a donkey and a dog walking into an abandoned living room. Reminiscent of Bresson, Ozu and Roy Andersson. 5/10.

✴️    

Fabulous deadpan comedian Steven Wright X 2:

✳️✳️✳️ TV on YouTube: Steven Wright appeared on Craig Ferguson’s show 22 times. They both had a blast. 9/10

✳️✳️✳️ I never knew that he actually won an Oscar in 1988 for his offbeat film, The Appointments of Dennis Jennings. As if a disturbed inner dialogue from his stand-up, was made into a strange short comedy. With Mike Starr as the doorman / substitute psychiatrist, and Rowan Atkinson as his real, bored psychiatrist.

✴️      

Shadows and Fog,  Woody Allen’s misfired German Expressionist experiment, an idiotic  Kafkaesque indulgent, a-la Fritz Lang, Pabst and Murnau. One of his worst movies.  2/10

✴️

2 more re-watches:

✳️✳️✳️ San Junipero is considered by some as one of the best Black Mirror episodes, because of its unusual uplifting tone. But even after watching it a few times, I still don’t see it. Maybe because the dating scenes were too young for me, or because the simulated reality background is hokum, or because its “daring” same-sex happy ending story was mundane.

✳️✳️✳️ Guilty pleasure: The perfect Close Encounters of the Third Kind, with François Truffaut as Claude Lacombe. George Lucas was sure that the movie will be such a colossal hit so he traded points with Spielberg before the premiers. He gave 2.5% of Star Wars profits against 2.5% of Close Encounters.

(I remember taking David to the original viewing, when he was 7 in 1977.)

✴️    

Alan J. Pakula’s Presumed Innocent, a terrible court “drama” with Harrison Ford and Raul Julia. Uninspired piece of average trash. 1/10

- - - - -

(My complete movie list is here)

[peikonlainen]

Just a quick question but what often gets you inspired?✨

Oh boy ehhhhhh - here we go to the never ending rabbit hole!!

Sometimes small things gets my attention like e.g. squirrels paws, unique red face of a person at a cold day or seeing chair upside down on icy lake (honestly I am now working on long comic about trolls inspired by that chair).

Comic art and animations inspires me greatly! Lately I have been inspired by animations gems like the thief and the cobbler, treasure island from 1988 (and other Soviet Union animations) and the king and the mocking bird. The animation process fascinates me greatly, how can one make smooth and imaginative animations is wonderful! I can't get enough of it all.

Also concept of kindness inspires me greatly. I have gone throw...lets say a lot. I love stories that show kindness where it is needed, e.g. Tove Jansson's story of invisible child. The child was bullied by their family so much that they turned completely invisible and lost their own voice, eventually they found confidence and selfworth in themselfs thanks to kindness of Moomins. I want my feelings to be seen and heard but sometimes world or people are overwhelming. Kindness is important, otherwise we will fall apart or at least I do. I am still on my way to be kind and understanding of myself and othets but those qualities are more important to me than ever.

Couple weeks ago I started to collect stuff that inspires me or I find interesting. I will list most of them below. If I am not saying anything about certain box, it means I enjoy the show/comic/meme/animal but cannot put my finger on why. Usually those make me smile and give new pespective about life. Somethings might be there twice because I am forgetful baboon!

Junji Ito's horror comics are visually out of this world! But my fav is his humorous comic about his cats. It was so different from his other comics that I fell in love with it.

Emma manga made by Kaoru Mori. Usually I can't stand romantic stories but the characters but the story and the art works perfectly together in her comics.

Comics and animations of @cecameron are gorgeus and fun!

Tove Jansson's books, comics, art and life in general.

Rainbow Road from Muppets is my favourite song and I wish it would be played at my funeral one day. Its hopeful song that fills me with joy.

Entranta from Shera. She never gives up, I wanna be like her! I wanna see failure is part of the process and helps me get further little by little + its nothign to be shamefull of.

Ponyo's fathers frustration is relatable, also the whole movie is wonderful and colorful. Its maybe my favorite ghibli movie.

Scarr my beloved weirdo! The image was in the tarot pack of the grim adventures of Billy and Mandy and he is of course the hermit (which is my personality card)

@deep-dark-fears comics surprise me by giving new ideas to express fear.

Hugo Simberg was Finnish artist at 1900's. Symbolism and sympathetic characters of devils and death has inspired me since I was 8 years old.

Treasure planet is one of my favourite disney movies. The father son relationship between Silver and Jim is great and makes me cry everytime.

Hypnopotamus and Warren Stone from ROTTMNT. Their relationship is wholesome and inspiring + the show itself is fun, full of action and passion! I love it!

Tintin comics are almost religious in my family. It was one of the first comics I saw different from different parts of the world and how tintin could become friends even the most oddest (looking at you captain Haddock) people is marvellous.

The penguin my belowed ❤❤❤

Mörkövahti is Finnish children book that accidentally inspired me greatly. The world of troll like creatures, magical elements in the story and research of the creatures made me fall in love in the world of the books. I often love to read books for kids or teens, they are more interesting and I don't have to fear to be faced with rape, sexism and other nasty stuff.

Stop motion animation and expecially Arman animations have been always part of my life. I have soft spot for the pirates movie thanks to it's humor, naivety and animation style.

Adventure time is one of my favourite series and couple of things stuck with me. Some people are build different, you don't have to understand it but you need to respect them. I love this idea greatly and I try to live by it.

Pinsir is my favourite pokemon and it says a lot.

Mr Pogo and other smart ape characters inspire me greatly. No wonder new planet of the apes trilogy is part pf my movie collection. I am not sure why I love smart apes as characters but it always works.

Wander over yander whole concept is to be kind and help people out, I love it.

Peto was made for me by @elle-eedee at lgbtq trolls discord server. Peto ended up becoming my ultimate comfort character and I love to draw him and make stories for him. I loved the way elle-eedee combined my favorite things to create him ❤ also their colorful art inspires me everyone I see it.

@alioutfit blog is blog of style choices of man named Ali. I want to find my own style like Ali.

The murder she wrote is nostalgic for me and I wanna get into that series again! The fact smart older woman is the main focus inspires me. I love Agatha Christi stories too so it checks out.

Hugs + rottmnt. I love hugs and the show has a lot of good hugs!

Don Rosa's Donald Duck comics are the best! Those who don't know, Donald Duck comics are big in Finland!

Heikko Peikko (meaning Weak Troll) was stop motion animation series in Finland at 70's. Its wonky, basic and charming story of Heikko Peikko's everyday life.

The meme that made me less depressed

@foxing_around had wonderful comic that made me think over my friends over my sad ass.

Squirrels, I like them a lot. They remind me of my grandpa who loved forest and nature.

My sandwich with a face

Monsters petting each others! My friend has a lot of arkham maddness board games that comes with monsters. I like to play with the figurines, they are so lovely monsters!

Concept art of toothless from how to train your dragon. Why toothless couldn't look like this little ugly thing??? I would have loved him from bottom of my ❤

Kingdom of lonely bananas sign was at supermarket. Little imaginative ideas like these are great.

Pasila series is good stuff, it was said to be Finnish South Park.

My photo of snail ❤

WoY faces are glorious

The snow queen movie from 1957 gives me live. Its one of my favourite Soviet Union animation movie.

My photo of my special secret place at summer

I know only these two from Transformers comics and their love is wonderful. Truly I haven't read the comics...I wish I could tho!

Sherlock Holmes books are awesome

New ducktales series had so many characters from the comics I couldn't believe it at first! Finally I had my favourite characters like Fethry on the show!

I love odd looking animals because I am one too

Animal Crossing is a game I thought I would never play. It looked like a baby game when my big bro gave the it to me at the time gamecube was new console. He bought it because it had a memory card and he know nothing about the game. I tried it and never looked back ❤

The ping pong animation is my favourite animation series from Japan. I got the manga even I can't read it since it's straight from Japan. It's more about the lifes of the characters and how they grow as people than the game itself (or at least it feels like it). The story feels real in a way, that the characters are three dimensional and their reactions are natural. Some charachters stop developing as players, some loose interest completely, some work hard to be the best, some forget why they played in the first place and some found new ways to live their lives. The story is good for my soul.

Comic of @catmilks made me realise there are other people like me. The feeling of the comic is relatable and hopeful, things will pass and life goes on + make sure you take care of yourself.

Comics of @ stuffnoonetoldme made me reflect my life and how I see myself.

@diva-humon has good points of life. I realised I have very christian way of thinkin even I am not religious or have ever been part of any religios.

Suomenlinna, I loved it!

[punkrockmads]

The Moment I Said It

Unspoken Words part 1

Sarah's bedroom is illuminated by the warm yellow glow of the early morning sun. It isn't often she gets to sleep in. She normally has to be up before dawn for whatever assignments she's been given that day but today, she and Jesse get to start their patrol a little later than usual.

A soft knock on Sarah's bedroom door wakes her up. Joel. She lets out a tired sigh, stretching and standing up to open the door. She reaches for the cold metal handle, swinging the door open. Joel chuckles at her appearance. Her hair is messy and tangled and she's still in her pajamas. Sarah shivers, the shorts and tank top not providing much warmth. She wishes she could crawl back under her warm blankets.

"You better have a good reason for waking me up the morning I finally get to sleep in." Sarah yawns, rubbing her eyes with her palms.

"Are pancakes a good reason?" Joel asks, leaning against the doorframe with a grin. Sarah puts a finger on her bottom lip, pretending to think. The answer is obvious.

"I guess." She says with a tired smile. "Is Ellie still here?"

Joel shakes his head. "No, she wanted to get an early start on her patrol with Dina. Jesse's here, though."

"Oh, cool." Sarah says, a little deflated that Ellie's already gone but happy one of her friends is here. Ellie's been more of a sister to Sarah than a best friend since the girls met. You'd think they were actually siblings if you didn't know their beginnings. Sarah's mother passed away while giving birth to her. Her father passed away before she was born, leaving her in Joel's care with nothing but a tiny stuffed lamb she named Gus and memories that will never be made. Sarah sometimes wishes she could've known her parents; wonders what they were like. But she tries not to think about it too much. It's pretty normal for kids to lose their parents nowadays. She can't complain, though. Joel's stepped up and treated her like his own daughter. She'd even tried calling him dad once but he told her not to call him that.

Sarah leans out of the doorway, hanging onto the frame with both hands. "Hey Jesse!" She calls.

"Morning!" Jesse yells from somewhere downstairs. Sarah smiles. Jesse always has this cheerful tone that can brighten anyone's day.

"Alright, scoot. Get dressed. Your boyfriend and I are waiting on you." Joel nudges Sarah's shoulder teasingly.

"He is not my boyfriend." Sarah groans, closing the door in Joel's face.

"Yeah, that's almost exactly what Ellie said about Dina at first, too." Joel says through the door. He can practically feel Sarah's eye roll as he walks back downstairs.

Sarah gets dressed quickly, not wanting to keep the guys waiting longer. She laces up her black steel toed boots and throws one of Joel's old flannels over her tank top before grabbing Gus. She hugs the little sheep for a moment before going downstairs, passing the kitchen and going to the door to put the stuffed animal in her backpack.

"You know, if you didn't carry that sheep around, you'd have more room in your backpack for supplies." Jesse teases, standing beside where Sarah kneels, zipping up her bag.

"You leave Gus alone." Sarah stands up, shoving Jesse back with a playful smile. "He is my child and he goes where I go."

"Yes ma'am." Jesse chuckles, putting his hands up in surrender. Sarah moves to punch his shoulder but Jesse dodges and grabs her fist. "Alright, let's eat. We've got an hour before Maria wants us to head out."

"What route are we doing?" Sarah asks as Jesse pulls her into the dining room. Joel joins the teenagers, walking out of the kitchen with a cup of coffee and sitting in a chair at the end of the table. Sarah sits in the seat diagonal from him. People don't get to eat meals other than dinner at home often, usually grabbing food from the diner before heading off to do their daily activities so it's nice when they get to spend the morning talking amongst themselves and connecting with their families.

"Creek trails." Jesse answers, sitting across from Sarah. "Should be pretty simple, there hasn't been many infected spotted on that route for a while."

"That route is really pretty." Sarah says, taking a bite of her pancakes. "Especially now since it's Spring."

"You know, you could probably pick some wildflowers for your room." Jesse says, shoveling bites of pancake into his mouth. "Replace those dead ones you've had for ages."

"Yeah, that's a good idea." Sarah agrees.

Joel smiles, hearing the two talk about simple things. It almost feels like the world hasn't gone to shit. It almost feels like how things were before the infected; peaceful. He clears his throat, suddenly feeling a bit nervous. "Sarah, I've got somethin' to tell you after patrol if you're not busy."

"Is something wrong?" Sarah asks, looking at him with worried eyes.

"No. Nothin's wrong." Joel assures, putting a hand up to signal her to stay calm. "Just somethin' I gotta tell you."

Sarah nods, hesitant. "Okay." She says, turning her attention back to her plate of half eaten pancakes. She wonders what Joel has to tell her that he can't say right now. Is he dying?!

"It's Dina's turn to pick a movie tomorrow." Jesse says, successfully distracting Sarah from Joel's previous comment. The four friends always have a movie night with popcorn and expired candy every other Friday. It's a way to destress and relax after a long two weeks as well as bond with one another. Dina always picks shitty sci fi movies just to watch the other three cringe and laugh at them.

"Oh no." Sarah chuckles. "Please tell me you hid the sci fi movies."

"Yep." Jesse laughs, the three of them finishing their breakfast. "She'll never find them." Sarah stands up, carrying her plate into the kitchen. Jesse follows, taking her plate out of her hands. She reaches for it but Jesse is a good three inches taller so he holds it up, just out of her reach. He uses his leg to kick her away and sets both of the plates in the sink, turning on the water.

"Hey!" Sarah tries to shove past him but Jesse blocks her. "Guests aren't supposed to do house chores!" Jesse laughs at her failed attempts to get around him to the sink. He knows she's more than capable of shoving him out of the way but, since they're simply playing around, she's not using her full strength. Sarah may be small, but she's super strong for her slightly toned build. She prides herself more on her agility, stealth and quick thinking.

Jesse places the dishes and silverware on the drying wrack. "Too late." He grins, folding his arms over his chest.

"You suck." Sarah whines, tugging a lock of Jesse's black hair.

"Well, you swallow! Ow! Hey!" Jesse yanks Sarah's hand away as she laughs at him.

"Jesse, don't say that in my house." Joel complains, walking into the kitchen.

"Sorry, Joel." Jesse says as the teenagers move out of the way. They walk to the front door, grabbing their gear and going into the living room.

"Do you have everything besides Gus?" Jesse asks, double checking the magazine of his gun. Sarah does the same, making sure her 9mm is loaded. She tucks the gun into the back of her jeans, adjusting her shirt so it rests behind the gun, making it easier to grab in a rush.

"Yes, I do." Sarah replies, putting on her backpack and grabbing her bow. "And Gus is just as important as everything else in here so you hush." After making sure they have their gear, the two go to leave for patrol.

"Stay safe, kiddo." Joel says, hugging Sarah.

"Always." Sarah says with a smile, turning and walking out the front door. When she's out of earshot, Jesse gives Joel a small smile.

"She's gonna understand." He says. "It'll take time... but she'll understand."

"I hope you're right." Joel sighs. The old man rubs at his beard, looking to the floor with nervous eyes.

"It'll be okay." Jesse says, turning to leave. "See ya." He waves, running to catch up with Sarah who's waiting at the end of the walkway. Joel waves back, closing the door as the two walk away.

"So, have you managed to convince Ellie to move into the house yet?" Jesse asks, walking beside Sarah to the stables.

"Nope." Sarah sighs. "Pretty sure she likes the garage because it's easier to sneak girls over in the middle of the night." Sarah chuckles, remembering the time she accidentally walked in on Ellie and her ex girlfriend making out. Sarah wasn't really a huge fan of Cat. She was just too... normal. Boring. She can't help but admit she's much happier that Ellie is with Dina now. Even Jesse knows they're a better couple.

"I should've thought of that when my parents and I got here. Too bad we don't have a garage." Jesse chuckles. The sun shines down on the two friends, making Sarah's hair look like golden, silky curtains, moving gently in the cool breeze. The yellow glow is warm, making the chilly air more tolerable.

"What were you and Joel talking about?" Sarah asks as they walk into the stables, her curiosity getting the better of her. She doesn't like being nosey.

"Joel was just reminding me to get you back safely." Jesse shrugs, taking his horse from one of the stable workers. Sarah takes her horse, following Jesse out to the gate.

"C'mon, Ponyo." Sarah commands the caramel colored horse. Ponyo has been hers since she came to Jackson with Joel and Ellie. Sarah taught her to understand different commands using words and special clicking sounds. "He didn't threaten you again, did he?" She remembers the first few times she went on patrol with Jesse. Joel made sure he understood the consequences that would come if she got hurt.

"Nah, just a friendly talk." Jesse says before mounting his horse, Cobalt. Sarah mounts Ponyo, tying her bow to the side of the saddle with the rope. The gates open and the two set off.

The light Spring breeze rustles through the treetops, green leaves creating a harmonious, music-like sound. Horse hooves trample through the creek waters, causing tiny clear droplets to fly into the air and shimmer like stars. Wildflowers rest along the edges, basking in the sun's glow. The water rushes, blending with the sounds of the birds and insects.

"I think you should get a cat." Sarah says, changing the subject. Jesse rides not too far ahead of her, both of them scanning the treeline for infected they most likely won't find. It's better to be safe, though.

"What?" Jesse laughs, surprised to hear something so random. "Why a cat?"

"I dunno." Sarah shrugs, grinning when Jesse turns back to look at her with a puzzled face. "I just see you with a cat. Like a teacup kitten! Did you know that's a thing?!"

"What the hell's a teacup kitten?" Jesse asks.

"It's a kitten that can fit in a teacup!" Sarah says, enthusiastically. "Duh!"

"No way." Jesse snorts in disbelief.

"Uh, yes way! I saw them in a book!" Sarah cuts in. "Man... I wish I had a teacup kitten. Hey, do you think I could find a kitten one day?"

"Didn't you say you saw giraffes once?" Jesse recalls.

"Yeah, with Joel and Ellie." Sarah confirms, rolling up the sleeves of her flannel.

"Well, if you can find a giraffe, I'm sure you can find a cat." Jesse says. "Probably be harder to find one, though. They're not as big."

"One day, I'll own a dozen cats." Sarah decides. "I'll train them to attack infected."

"That'll be interesting to see." Jesse says as they arrive at the first outpost. The two of them tie up their horses in an open section of the building and head to the pallet covering a hole in the wall. Sarah stays quiet, pondering what Joel had said earlier that morning. "You good?" Jesse asks, moving the pallet out of the way and crawling through the hole.

"Yeah." Sarah says, quietly. She follows him through the hole, still stuck in her own thoughts.

"You're lying." Jesse points out, climbing up the rope into the office.

"I am not!" Sarah argues, pulling herself up to the floor.

"Yes, you are. I know you." Jesse says. He's right. He knows pretty much everything about her. He knows her almost better than she knows herself. He can tell when something's off about her from a mile away. "What's goin' on in that head of yours?" Sarah avoids his caring gaze, signing the two in and reporting the lack of infected.

"I'm just..." Sarah stands up, pressing a hand to her stomach, just over the scar that remains there from a bullet wound. Everyone believes she was shot by hunters. Well, everyone but Ellie and the Miller brothers. They know that she was really shot by a Firefly when they were escaping St. Mary's. She kept going as though she hadn't been injured at all. Joel didn't notice until they were driving away and he glanced over to see the blood seeping through her shirt. "I'm worried about what Joel has to say."

"Why are you worried?" Jesse asks, taking a few steps closer. Sarah looks up at him, gripping her shirt in her fist.

"What if... What if Joel is sick or he decided he doesn't want me around anymore?" Sarah's eyes widen at the confession of her greatest fear. "I know, it's stupid. But I'm always scared that people will get sick of me and just leave me behind." She grits her teeth, immediately regretting her words. What a dumb fear.

"Hey." Jesse takes Sarah's hand away from her shirt, holding it in both of his. His hands make hers look even smaller. They're warmer than hers, too. "Being afraid isn't stupid. But you will never be abandoned, okay? Joel's not leaving, Ellie and Dina aren't leaving, and I will never leave. You're not gonna be left behind, I promise."

Sarah smiles, something that Jesse can't help but feel extremely happy about. His own smile grows wider when Sarah hugs him. "Thanks." She says as Jesse hugs back. He rests his chin on her head.

"You're welcome." He responds. "And, Sarah?"

"Hm?"

"Whatever Joel tells you... just remember he really loves you." Sarah purses her lips, not sure exactly how to respond. She settles for nodding, cheek rubbing against his chest.

"C'mon." Sarah pulls away, adjusting her backpack with a little bounce. "Let's get this over with so I can get those wildflowers."

Jesse chuckles, following her to the rope. "Lead on."

Sarah and Jesse return to Sarah's house later that day, the patrol being fairly easy. Joel isn't home, probably out on his patrol route. Sarah lets out a deep sigh, setting her stuff down by the stairs and kneeling to dig around in her backpack. She pulls out Gus, pressing him against her chest as Jesse sets his bag beside hers.

"Think Ellie and Dina are home?" Jesse asks, handing Sarah the wildflowers she'd picked on their way back to Jackson.

Sarah shrugs, taking the flowers from him. "Should be. Probably in the garage."

"I'm gonna go bug them for a few minutes." Jesse grins, heading towards the back door.

Sarah simply nods, standing up to move into the living room. "Okay. Wanna stay and watch a movie 'till Joel gets back?"

"Sure." Jesse agrees. "You gonna cuddle with me instead of that toy?" He teases, gesturing to Gus.

"You know, I would've considered it but you called Gus a toy." Sarah raises a brow, a victorious smile on her face.

"Damn!" Jesse exclaims, pretending to be upset.

"I'll think about it." Sarah chuckles at Jesse's grin as he goes to greet their friends. Sarah's smile fades a bit when he walks out the door. She holds Gus tighter, searching the TV stand cabinet for a good movie to watch. She settles on a movie she's seen a million times but still adores; Coraline. After getting everything set up, she sits on the couch, pulling her knees up to her chest and resting Gus on top of them, holding his little stuffed limbs in her hands. Before the movie can even start, the back door slams and Jesse runs into the living room.

"Do NOT go in the garage!" Jesse says with a mix of horror and disgust.

"Why? What's wrong?" Sarah asks, confused.

"Let's just say I may have walked in on something I shouldn't have." Jesse explains, sitting on the couch beside Sarah.

"Oh!" Sarah says, immediately picking up on the reason Jesse's face is a beat red. "Well, I guess they're not watching Coraline with us." She chuckles. Jesse groans, most definitely scarred for life. Ten minutes into the movie, Jesse gets sick of Gus getting all the attention. He reaches over and snatches him from Sarah, despite her protests, and pulls her into his side, an arm wrapped around her shoulders.

"You don't get a choice. You get cuddles." Jesse laughs. Sarah makes no attempt to pull away, burying herself further into his arms, instead.

"If you don't... give me Gus... right now... I will cut your hand off." Sarah threatens, voice low. Jesse hands her Gus, his other arm moving to wrap in front of her. She holds onto his arm with one hand, Gus in the other. Just as they've done for years.

"Hey, why do you think the Beldam chose buttons?" Jesse asks, watching the buttons change as the creepy Other Mother calls out colors.

"Cause she's crazy." Sarah mumbles, entranced in the movie. "She probably likes the pain she causes when she sews them to their faces."

"Kinky." Jesse jokes. Sarah elbows him in the ribs. "Ow! What is your deal with hurting me today?" Sarah just chuckles, forgetting all about Gus somewhere on the couch and wrapping her arms around Jesse's torso. She takes a deep breath and sighs, her flannel covering her like a blanket.

Joel comes back just before sunset, finding the two teenagers curled up on the couch, Gus laying by Sarah's feet. He can't help the fear he hides inside of him. He crosses his arms, clearing his throat. The two turn to look at him before being sucked back into the end of the movie. "Hello, you two." He greets with a smile.

"Hey, Joel." Sarah responds. "How was patrol?"

"Pretty good." Joel responds, sticking his hands the pockets of his jeans. "Sarah, I... I need to talk to you."

"Okay." Sarah says, standing and following Joel into the dining room. She watches as he sits in one of the chairs, gesturing for her to sit beside him. She does so, pulling up a chair and turning it to face him. She feels a bit anxious, looking at his worried eyes.

"What I'm about to say..." Joel starts, looking to the wooden floor. "I'm not sure you're gonna like it." This only makes Sarah more worried.

"Joel, are you sick? Did- are you infec-"

"I'm your dad." Joel cuts Sarah off, looking directly at her.

"Okay." Sarah snorts. "Funny joke." She chuckles before seeing the serious look on Joel's face. "You're not joking." Her eyes go wide, confusion mixed with so many other feelings. "Wait... how... what?"

"I didn't wanna tell you because I was afraid." Sarah blinks a few times, trying to piece everything together. Sarah just stares at him, a look of pure shock on her face. "Say something... please?"

"You told me my dad was dead." Her voice is almost too quiet to hear but Joel picks up every word. "You lied to me..." At that moment, Sarah's shock turns into anger and hurt. She stands up, almost shoving the chair backwards. "Do you know how many nights I stayed up wishing I had a mother or father and feeling stupid for even wishing it?! You let me believe the only thing I had left of my parents was a fucking stuffed animal!!" Tears slip down Sarah's cheeks. She gasps for air, suddenly finding it hard to breathe. She's confused. One hand goes to the scar on her stomach. "I even tried to call you dad and you shut me down!! You made me feel like you didn't want me!!" Sarah sobs, breathing heavier. It feels like no air is entering her lungs. It feels like she's drowning. "I felt horrible for wishing you were my real dad because I thought you'd never want me as your daughter!!" She doesn't notice, but Jesse stands just behind her, trying not to intervene and make the situation worse.

Joel stands up, reaching for Sarah. "Sarah, I-"

"Don't touch me." Sarah seethes, wiping her cheeks. A look of hurt flashes on Joel's shameful face. He never wanted to hurt her. All Sarah's yelling causes Ellie and Dina to rush in from the garage. Sarah backs away, bumping into Jesse before running upstairs to her room. Dina goes to follow her, Jesse close behind, but Ellie puts a hand up.

"I've got this." Ellie says, climbing the stairs to Sarah's room. She hears the sobbing and choked gasps, immediately knowing Sarah is having a panic attack. She wastes no time knocking, opening the door just enough to squeeze into the room and close it behind her. She finds Sarah curled up in a ball on her bed, desperately trying to get air into her lungs. She's only had a panic attack once before and it wasn't as bad as this.

Ellie rushes to her her side, sitting in front of Sarah and gently grabbing her shoulders. "Sarah, look at me." Ellie commands with a soft but worried voice. "Look at me."

"Ellie." Sarah sobs. Everything she believed about her past had just been completely changed. If Joel doesn't want her as his daughter, why did he tell her the truth? Does he feel bad for lying all those years? Does it keep him up at night? Ellie pulls her into a hug, holding her shaking body.

"You're okay." Ellie says, rocking side to side a little. "Take a breath. Breathe with me, okay?" Sarah nods, clinging to Ellie like a lifeline. "In...out...in... see, you got it." Ellie continues to take deep breaths with Sarah until her breathing evens out.

"Why did he tell me?" Sarah sniffles. Ellie grows confused. Why wouldn't she want to know?

"What do you mean?" She asks.

"Why would he tell me he's my dad if he doesn't want me to be his daughter?" Sarah pulls away, laying back on the bed.

Ellie immediately feels Sarah's pain. "Of course he wants you to be his daughter." She says. "He was just... he was scared."

"Ellie, the last time I called him dad, he yelled at me for twenty fucking minutes. He was so pissed I thought his head was going to explode. He. Doesn't. Want. Me! Why else would he lie to me?" Sarah cries, covering her face with her palms. "He let me believe I had no family." Ellie isn't sure how to respond. Sarah went her entire life believing she knew what happened to her parents only to find out it was a lie. She wants to be happy Joel really is her father but she can't get over the fact that he lied to her. It's silent for a moment before Sarah speaks again.

"So, you know... Who else does?" She asks.

"Uh... Tommy and Maria knew from the start. Jesse knew and now Dina knows." Ellie answers, fidgeting with her fingers.

"Jesse?" Sarah's surprised at first, remembering what Jesse said when ther were on patrol. "Of course." Joel had told him this morning.

"Is there anything I can do?" Ellie asks, wanting to be there for Sarah. Sarah rolls over, facing away from the door.

"I just need some time alone, please?" Sarah doesn't want to be mean to Ellie but she needs a moment to process everything.

"Okay." Ellie nods, rubbing Sarah's shoulder. "Do you want me to bring you some dinner?" Sarah simply shakes her head, closing her eyes. Ellie nods, patting Sarah's shoulder before leaving her be.

[almostkoo]

Taehyung on the Cliff (03)

pairing: taehyung x reader (platonic), jungkook x reader (platonic), taehyung x jungkook (platonic)

summary: after finding a new job taehyung finally gets into the swing of things being on the land and is starting to enjoy himself hopefully not all good things come to an end (ponyo au!)

word count: 1.2k

warnings: unedited, language, cliff hanger:)

author’s note: this took forever to get up bc of tech troubles, it’s originally a filler chapter but not in a bad way just a calm before the storm type way, anywho I hope you all enjoy

Taehyung living amongst the two of you had gone better than originally planned, his job at the antique store was bringing him in enough money to help out. Within the two months he had been staying there he already fit in like the missing piece of a puzzle.

On Friday nights he found himself wedged in between you and Jungkook to continue the tradition you two set of watching a movie and eating takeout. Most of the time it was just the two of you trading off back and forth on Marvel movies. This week it was Jungkook’s pick of Iron Man 3.

Halfway through the movie Taehyung excused himself to the bathroom, it had been about 20 mins since he had left and you were starting to get curious as to what was taking him so long.

“Jungkook, can you go check on Tae? He’s been gone for a while now.” You asked him.

Jungkook whined. “In the middle of the movie?”

“This isn’t even the best Iron Man and you know it. Can you please just go check up on him?” Jungkook stalled, not moving.

“Fuck it. I’ll go see what’s going on.” You got up off the couch making your way to the bathroom. You stood outside the door, taking a small breath before knocking quietly.

“Tae? Are you okay?”

“Yeah” his voice came from the other side of the door. His deep voice sounded raspy like he had been crying.

“I’ll be out in a second.”

You lowered your voice before speaking. “Taehyung, if you need to talk Jungkook and I are right here.” The door slowly creaked open revealing Taehyung there, eyes red and cheeks tear stained.

“I am okay. I just needed a moment to myself.” He said, dropping his head down.

“Are you sure you don’t wanna talk about whatever it is that’s bothering you?”

“I” Taehyung paused. “I don’t want to burden you with my issues.”

“You’re never going to be a burden to me so spill.”

“Spill?” Taehyung questioned.

“Tell me what’s the matter.”

“I miss home. But I know I can’t go back. I miss the familiarity and comfort that comes with being there. I know this is all a part of change but it doesn’t fix the hurt I feel in my chest.”

You sighed. Everything Taehyung had said to you, you understood. When you first started college you spent many nights crying yourself to sleep from homesickness. Missing your room, in your parents house, your moms cooking. If you didn’t have Jungkook you really don’t know how you would’ve made it through first semester.

“I know things seem rough now. But you have my support and Jungkook’s too. Hopefully having people around the transition from home to here will be easier for you.” You said, resting your hand on Taehyung’s shoulder. He let out a breath of relief pulling you in for a tight hug.

“Now tell me how to wipe that frown off your face.” You said.

“Can we go to a drug store?”

“What like Walgreens or something?” You asked. Taehyung nodded. You checked the time, it was only 8:00 you both could make it to the drug store a few blocks before it closed.

“Sure let’s go.”

The walk to Walgreens took about 15 mins and during the stroll there you still didn’t quite know what Taehyung wanted. He looked at the sky as you two walked keeping his thoughts to himself. You had left Jungkook resting on the couch finishing the movie, you knew he wasn’t about to get up any time soon.

You entered the store. Taehyung stopped and looked around reading the signs. He took off in one direction as you followed behind him. What made Taehyung dart off in the store, you would soon find out.

Taehyung stood in the middle of the aisle looking around. You followed his line of sight to see he was staring at the section of hair dye.

“Why didn’t you say you wanted to dye your hair?” You asked him.

“Because I’m nervous. Last time I was on land there weren't things like this available. But the other day at the store some kids came in asking me about my hair and that’s how I find out more about these hair coloring products.”

“Well it’s a limited selection here so choose wisely.” You said. Taehyung reached and picked up a container of black hair dye.

“Is this any good?” He asked.

“It’s black hair dye. It’s manic panic. I think it’s okay. You know if you go black it’ll be hard to lift it back up in case you want to color it again.”

“That’s okay. I don’t want to stand out anymore. Black will work.” He made his way up to the front, you trailed behind him quietly as he paid for the hair dye.

You quietly made the trek back to the apartment. Taehyung happily swung the bag in his grip. You had a question on your mind but had been hesitant to ask him but you couldn’t take it anymore.

“Tae, what did you mean you didn’t want to stand out anymore?”

“I just don’t want to be noticed anymore. I want to blend in. I just .. I feel like I get weird looks at the antique store. It makes me nervous so I’d rather just try to look less like myself.” You were confused by what Taehyung exactly meant by his words. But prying might make him feel bad so you didn’t want to continue. You got him to smile and that was the goal.

You got to the apartment back in one piece. Jungkook was still on the couch this time watching Captain Marvel.

“Fair warning” you said rummaging through the kitchen drawers “we're gonna need new kitchen gloves.” You grabbed the yellow rubber gloves out of one of the drawers.

“Wait what are you talking about? That’s our like .. 5th set this month.” Jungkook whined.

“Okay and I’ll make sure to get another pair. Tae wants to dye his hair and I’m gonna make sure it looks nice. I would like to make sure our friend looks nice.” Jungkook sighed.

“If I have to let my fingers prune up because you forgot to get gloves I’m gonna eat all of the fancy cereal you like to eat.”

“Try me and I will pour every container of banana milk that’s in the fridge down the drain.” You said, you walked down the hallway to meet up with Taehyung in the bathroom.

Just as you finished putting the dye on Taehyung’s hair there was a knock at the door. You heard Jungkook let out a loud groan from the living room.

“How do you like it?” You asked him. Taehyung examined himself in the mirror, looking over the blue now stained black locks. His signature boxy smile appeared on his face.

“I love it. It’s me, in a strange way.”

“Taehyung, you have visitors.” Jungkook called. You and Taehyung exchanged a glance. You walked ahead of him still wearing the stained rubber gloves. In the living room stood two tall men with colorful hair. Their lines of sight passed you and you looked directly at Taehyung who stood behind you.

“Hello brother.” One of the men said with a grin.

[miraphoenix]

Tagged by: @just-odradek; I think this is the first time I’ve gotten tagged in something like this on this blog??

Nickname: I used to have one, but it’s fallen out of use in my family because they’re all working on using my new name. The nickname was Bean, and it was used way more than my birthname when I was a kid, unless someone was very pissed at me.

Gender: None gender with left beef (trans agender)

Sign: Aquarius sun, Aries moon, Gemini rising; I’ve been told this explains lots of things about me, but I know jack shit about astrology so?

Song stuck in my head: Broadside Electric’s version of The World Turned Upside Down. It’s not at all connected to the H*milton thing, it’s a song about an English movement back in 1649, when a bunch of people tried to farm common land and got harassed and assaulted by the army, and eventually forced off the land by said army and legal suits. Oysterband and Dick Gaughan also good versions of the song.

Sexuality: Sex-repulsed bi, I think is the best way to frame this one. Labels are hard.

Favorite animal: Oh heck, I really do have too many? I don’t even know if I can narrow that down to favorite extinct one vs favorite extant one... 

Current time: 2:30pm when I finished this question, dunno what time it’ll be when I finish this thing.

Cats or Dogs: I enjoy both! I think I’m more likely to have a cat in the future, though, as I’m pretty picky about dogs that I would personally live with.

Last movie I watched: Ponyo!

Last thing I googled: The lyrics to a Dropkick Murphys tune (Worker’s Song, for the curious)

Other blogs: None anymore. (This blog is a remake after I got tired of dealing with an annoying abusive asshole, and left my old one.)

Do I get asks: Nope. Although they are open!

Dream Job: I have better things to dream about than work.

When I created my blog: July 2019; my original blog was started back in March 2014.

Reasons for URL: It’s a contraction of “mirazin phoenix”, mirazin being the element of dreams from a now-private setting that a close friend and I share, and phoenix being... A gigantic fiery bird that dies and resurrects itself. So more or less, a big bird of dreams and fire that doesn’t have the good sense to stay dead. Which I feel like is a better representative of myself than my old url.

Following: 65; some of those are inactive, but are friends’ old blogs that it would feel wrong to not follow, yanno?

Average sleep: My body seems to just sleep 8 hours whether I like it or not.

Luck number: I’m fond of numbers divisible by three.

Currently wearing: The same thing I’m always wearing; tshirt, quick-dry zip-off shorts. I would dress like a goth palaeontologist, but I don’t have the money, and fashion is hard for my easily-overheating agender self. So I dress comfortably and try not to look at myself too long.

Dream trip: This is gay and corny, but getting to go out and see my dear friend again. I had wanted to go for their birthday this year, but +gestures broadly at the state of the US rn+

Favorite food: I mean, I would stab a guy for good feta, but past that I’m pretty flexible? It’s easier for me to list foods I don’t like. Like fish. Love working with fish, but the smell of it as a food... Big old nope.

Favorite song: So you might be able to tell by now that I’m real shit at picking single favorites of things? So I’m gonna give a few here. Adrenalin - New Model Army Born Feral - New Model Army Hurricane (Johnny’s Theme) - Lord Huron London Calling - The Clash This Must Be The Place - Talking Heads Blood Red Roses - Oysterband 100 Years of Solitude - The Levellers Lies Greed Misery - Linkin Park (also anything off of A Thousand Suns) My Way Home - Kirsty MacColl Beautiful Apocalypse - Kamelot Basically my taste in music is moderately eclectic and this isn’t even the half of it.

Instruments: I used to play French horn way back in the day. I want to learn to play the bagpipes one of these days.

Tagging: uhhhhh anyone who’s feeling like it? @kefnut-the-threski, have you done this one yet? @hookteeth, if you want to? No pressure, of course.

[sweetheartjeongguk]

ramen & company

pairing: hoseok x reader

genre: ponyo au, fluff, tiny angst (ponyo!hobi is a sensitive bean)

rating: pg

warning(s): mild mention of sickness, slight misunderstandings

word count: 2.7k+

summary: in which hoseok has a plan of revenge, but it doesn’t work out in the way he hoped it would.  

a/n: wow! it’s been what feels like forever! as an apology, here’s a cute hoseok piece to add to the studio ghibli au list! i barely edited this, so oops if there’s any mistakes.

also, disclaimer: i love park jimin and would gladly let him steal my ramen. 

masterlist | studio ghibli masterlist

In Hoseok’s defense, when he snatched your cell phone in the middle of the night to call your best friend Taehyung at 3 in the morning to tell him of his genius plan, Taehyung was all for it. 

As in he mumbled something unintelligible and Hoseok, being ever-so fluent in slurred Taehyung speech, translated “Hhgggh” into “Yeah, totally! Go for it!” 

That morning when you ask him why there was an outgoing call to Taehyung in your phone log, Hoseok simply shrugs and says “Maybe you did what humans call “buttock dialing”. 

Sure, when he asked the mailman for his advice, the mailman just shook his head and muttered under his breath about not being paid enough, followed by a very strange word that he’s never heard before. When he asked you for its definition, you cover his mouth with your hand and threaten him with a bar of soap. 

Hoseok shoves his face into his crossed arms, cheeks chubbing up as his lips draw into a cute pout. He wouldn’t be in this mess if it wasn’t for you and stupid Park Jimin. 

Park Jimin with the cool leather jacket, Park Jimin with the swoopy hair and cute smile. Park Jimin with the early morning coffees and breakfast burritos. 

Worst of all, Park Jimin with the at-home ramen dates. 

With Hoseok’s ramen. Hoseok’s.

If his citrus-colored hair could burn even brighter from jealousy (disguised as Shin ramen-fueled anger), it would compete in first place with the surface of the sun. You have barely noticed his grumpy behavior all week, being too busy with work and He-Who-Should-Not-Be-Named - you still think Hoseok’s talking about Voldemort, having overheard him speaking to himself in his room. It’s a miracle that you still haven’t been bothered by his incessant scoffing and stomping about his room.

Hoseok hasn’t been part of your life for that long, having taken residence in your shoddy house on the beach for three months. But the months that he’s been in your life has been some of the happiest you’ve ever had. You’d never expected that a tiny orange guppy washed up on the shore inside a mason jar would transform into the bright ball of energy living in your guest room. 

When you introduce him to people, you never know quite what to say. How would they react if you told them the truth about him being a “magic fish”? You’ve decided that you’ll just deal with the strange looks and hushed whispers about your “scandalous endeavours in the bedroom” and “penchant for living with strange men”. 

Martha from Accounting really does not know how to whisper quietly. 

Regardless of the stares and backhanded comments from your coworkers and family members, Hoseok’s completely and utterly in love with human life. Living sheltered in his underwater home by his father, he’s been adamant about trying everything all at once. You’ve tried to calmly remind to take one day at a time, but the sweet pout on his face is enough to shut your mouth and simply go with the flow. 

“Y/N, are you coming home early today?” Hoseok peeks his head around the doorframe into your bedroom where you’re getting ready for work. He tries not to flush too hard at the appearance of you in your silk bathrobe daintily applying cream and makeup to your skin. 

“Hmm, I might be. I’ll have to see first if I’m still on with Jimin for this thing later.” You answer absentmindedly, oblivious to the growing grimace on Hoseok’s face. “He asked for some ramen earlier before we head out to the skating rink so I might grab some packages for him before I head out again later.” 

“You hate skating.” 

You turn your head to look at Hoseok who’s busied himself with staring at the ground with a sudden interest. You shrug your shoulders. “I’ve never tried before.” 

“Yes, you have.” 

You raise an eyebrow. “When?”

“Remember when you told me that you tried when you were a kid and you said that you didn’t like it because you fell down and nearly broke your ankle?” Hoseok rushes out in one breath. Your eyes widen - you completely forgot about that.

“Oh wow, I completely forgot.” You laugh awkwardly. “I guess that I just threw that out of the window when Jimin asked me. But still doesn’t mean that I’m still not interested in trying again. After all, I was just eight when it happened.” 

“Well…” Hoseok stops himself before he could utter out his true feelings. “I hope...you have fun then.” 

You want to smile and thank the boy, but he’s already turning away and rushing down to his bedroom. You wince when you hear the door slam shut a little too roughly. 

“Just a bad day...I hope.” You mumble to yourself. You really hope so. 

Hoseok’s still in his room when you begin to make your way downstairs for work. You settle for a quiet knock on his door with a muffled message of “I’ll see you later.” It’s quiet inside, but you can hear his little feet across the wooden floor and a tiny knock from the other side. 

You can’t help but smile at the sound. Behind the door, so does Hoseok. 

The orange-haired boy watches sadly as your car pulls out of the driveway and onto the asphalt, disappearing into the distance behind the cluster of trees lining the road. Deep down, in the most selfish parts of Hoseok’s being, he wishes that you’d just turn back home and spend the rest of the day with him. Maybe your boss won’t need you for the entire day and instead send you home for an early vacation. Maybe (more like hopefully) Park Jimin will cancel on your “date” and you’d have to share the ramen with him instead! 

A comforting warmth blossoms inside his chest as he remembers the first time he tried ramen. It had been the second night of him staying at your house, and he still wasn’t accustomed to a human body. His limbs were too long on the small twin sized bed you provided him, and his stomach growled every two seconds after failing to be satisfied with the bland meal options you had in your fridge. 

Luckily, you had one last option left - two packets of ramen left in the back of your pantry, thankfully still early before its expiration date. He watched in awe as you cooked the noodles in the boiling pot of water, adding eggs and bits of ham into the broth. Hoseok had been too overly excited about the delicious and novel smell of ham that he had nearly burnt all of his taste buds off as he dug into the bowl. 

Since then, Hoseok’s been obsessed with the delicious noodle dish. He’s gained quite the collection since then, even having his own shelf in the pantry for his ramen pile. But ever since Park Jimin came barging into your life, that collection has slowly diminished.

All thanks to the stupid ramen stealer. 

“This will show him.” Hoseok whispers as he settles at the dining table and grabs his favorite pair of chopsticks.  “No more eating my ramen. No more stealing my Y/N.”

“No, really, Taehyung really said that!” You suck in a deep breath as you try to calm your shaking body from your laughter. “It took me an entire hour just to apologize to the customer and reassure that her son’s “big head” wasn’t a sign of a deadly illness. Taehyung just stood in the back laughing at me when her son kicked me in the leg.”

Jimin giggles cutely, nudging your side as you make your way up the stairs to your front door. “I have to meet Taehyung. I feel like he and I will get along quite well.”

“Ugh, don’t remind me. He’s going to make you into another one of him, and then bye bye to the Jimin I know and love.” You say sarcastically. 

“Hmm, is he cute though?” Jimin asks only half jokingly. “Because my last date that you hooked me up with, uh, didn’t make the cut.”

You wince. “I know, I’m sorry. I didn’t know he was going to bring his bonsai tree on the date. I thought Bonsai was the name of his dog or something.” 

“Uh huh, consider this ramen you’re giving me as recompense for your bad taste in men.” Jimin glares playfully. “Oh, speaking of ramen, are you sure Hoseok’s okay with me taking the last packages?”

You sigh. You still haven’t been able to figure out the cause of Hoseok’s bad mood today, but hopefully he’s cooled down since this morning. “It’ll be fine. I have to make a trip to the grocery store soon anyway, so I’m sure he’ll live. He practically has it for breakfast every week.”

Jimin follows after you as you open the front door and kick your shoes off. It’s eerily quiet in the house. Around this time, it’s normally filled with Hoseok’s excited shouts from his room upstairs followed by his rapid footsteps down the stairs to greet you. 

But now? Just silence. 

“Hoseok, I’m home! Jimin’s here too.” You call out, but there’s no response. 

“Maybe he’s asleep.” Jimin offers. You shake your head. 

“No way, his favorite show comes out at 9 PM, and he’s always up for that no matter what.” You answer, ignoring the curious look on Jimin’s face. “I’ll go look for him. Maybe he’s taking a nap.” 

You leave Jimin downstairs to check in his bedroom only to find an unmade bed and a scattering of clothes on the floor. Just as you make a mental note to berate Hoseok into doing his own laundry and learning the Marie Kondo way of folding, you hear Jimin shout from downstairs. 

“Y/N, he’s in here!” Your gut drops in nervousness when you hear the worried tone of his voice. 

Nearly slipping to your death as you race down the scarily steep stairs, you head in the kitchen where you heard Jimin’s voice. The lights are dim inside with only the small light in the tiny dining room left on. Jimin’s standing at the entrance of the kitchen with an uncomfortable smile on his face, blocking the view of your kitchen with his entire body. 

“Um, so good news is that I found him?” He cringes. “Bad news is I guess this means that I’m just going to have to buy my own ramen this time.” 

Your jaw drops open as soon as Jimin moves away, revealing the devastatingly large amount of empty ramen packages strung about the table and kitchen floor. Remnants of the seasoning lay sprinkled near the stove where Hoseok cooked, and eggshells and empty sliced ham containers litter the sink where Hoseok decided to throw them for the time being. 

Trailing your eyes back to the table, you stare in awe at the culprit of the mess. 

Hoseok’s whole body is sprawled about the surface, groaning quietly as in immense pain. You have no doubt that he most likely is, considering the amount of noodles and sodium he’s consumed in one sitting. You grimace at his pallid skin, slick with sweat and ramen broth. He’s just one noodle away from vomiting everything from his stomach onto your face. 

“Hoseok, honey, what did you do?” You try to ask gently, but it only comes out strained and slightly annoyed. “Were you trying to make yourself sick? What’s going on here?”

“N-N-No.” Hoseok moans. His stomach jumps even as he carefully lifts his upper body off the table and faces you, but he holds in the urge to throw up successfully. “I j-j-just wanted to-”

“Just wanted to what?” You frown.

Jimin’s still standing in the corner of the room, but once you make eye contact, he nods to the living room and silently makes his way there. 

“W-Wanted…” Hoseok looks down at his feet, crossing and uncrossing at his ankles and scrunching his toes up and down. He’s nervous, and having your eyes staring down at him with such heat is making him want to vomit from anxiety instead. 

“Hoseok, babe, you can tell me anything.” You assert with a sigh. It’s late at night and Jimin’s awkwardly waiting for you to finish, and you’re definitely not in the mood for beating around the bush about why Hoseok decided to consume a deadly serving of ramen noodles while you were away. “I won’t get mad at you, I promise. I just want to know why you ate all the ramen. Don’t you remember that I said I was going to give Jimin the ramen when I got home?”

Hoseok’s face instantly turns into a scowl. You mistake it for a look of “I’m-about-to-puke” and brace yourself with a stumble backwards just in case, but Hoseok just pushes himself around the chair with his back towards you. 

“Of course he’s here.” He grumbles almost inaudibly. 

“Excuse me? What do you mean?” You ask stiffly. “He’s my friend, why can’t he be here?”

Hoseok’s frown only deepens. “That’s the problem. He’s always here. It’s always him.” 

“What?” 

“Him. It’s always him.” Hoseok crosses his arms around his belly, cradling the tiny food pouch made from his impromptu mukbang in the kitchen. “You never have time for me anymore. Whenever I want to hang out with you, you always run away. But when he wants to do something, you’re rather quick about it.” 

You want to get angry. You want to shout at how it’s never always Jimin and that you try your very best to spend as much time with him as possible. 

But one look at his face, and you’re a goner. Kind eyes shimmering with tears, falling like jewels down his cheeks. Marred with sadness. Sadness that you created. 

“Hobi…” You try weakly. “Hobi, honey, how long have you felt this way? Why didn’t you say anything?” 

Hoseok sniffles. “Ever since you first left me to hang out with him. We were supposed to watch a movie together, and it was my turn to pick the movie. When I came downstairs to watch it with you, you were already out the door.”

You remember that day. It hadn’t been your intention to leave Hoseok all by himself that day. Jimin had an emergency he needed your help with, and it didn’t take much for you to get up your feet and rush out the door to help him. But in doing so, you forgot about someone else who means the most to you. Someone who you’ve been neglecting ever since and haven’t even noticed. 

“Babe, I’m sorry.” You lean forward to brush a stray hair from his forehead. Hoseok’s cheeks are flushed pink, but you simply blame it on the overeating. “I’ll try better next time, I promise.”

“You said that last time.” Hoseok whispers sadly, a teardrop clinging to his eyelashes. 

You wince. “I know I did. There will be times where I will say that but I won’t keep the promise.” Hoseok sighs deeply, but you continue. “But that doesn’t mean that I don’t care about you anymore and that I love someone else more than I love you.” 

Hoseok feels something tickling him in the pit of his stomach. He fights the urge to wrap his arms around his legs and squish his face into his lap to scream. 

“I know my best sucks right now, but I’ll try even harder, okay?” You smile when Hoseok nods. “In fact, tomorrow, you and I will go to the beach all day, okay? I’ll even bring an entire picnic. Any food you want, I’ll get it.” 

You reach out to grab Hoseok’s hand, intertwining your fingers together and squeezing them tight. Hoseok takes in a deep breath, praying to the great sorcerers and witches alive to grant him the power not to sweat profusely from the hands. 

Hoseok’s mouth twitches into a weak smile, fiddling with your fingers absentmindedly. “That’d be great. But…”

“But what?” 

“No ramen, please.” 

“Are you sure he doesn’t hate me?” 

“Yes, Jimin, don’t worry! I already went over everything with him earlier. In fact, he’s the one who asked if you and Tae wanted to come with us! He’s been wanting to hang out with you guys all summer!” 

“Then, why is he staring at me like he’s ready to slaughter me and my entire family.”

“Oh, that’s because you still haven’t brought the food over yet. After all, Hoseok loves ham.” 

[cometothecatbureau]

ANSWER ALL THE GHIBLI QUESTIONS 😛

I should have known you had my back on this ^^

1. What was the first movie by them that you watched?

Spirited Away! This was when the English dub release came out in 2003. A friend of mine at school rented it from Blockbuster, and then came to school and subsequently got every little girl in the class obsessed. Looking at my old “drawing books” you can pinpoint exactly when that happened because I go from drawing Hamtaro and Pokemon to Lin, Haku and Chihiro for every day afterwards. 

2. Which movie is your favourite? 

I think my URL might answer that one! For anyone who isn’t familiar though, it’s The Cat Returns! I have the original manga story that the movie was adapted into, which was originally based off a traditional story called The Cat Returns The Favour. 

3. Which film would you like to live in?

Again, because it’s my favourite, probably The Cat Returns but My Neighbour Totoro and actually Ponyo are VERY close seconds. 

4. Which do you think is the most underrated?

Pocco Rosco, actually! Maybe because that one isn’t as “pretty” or whimsical as the other movies, it tends to get kind of tossed aside? Regardless, it’s got some of the best writing, humour and voice acting I’ve seen. Not to mention the overall idea itself is super creative, and the cast has some badass women to really flesh it all out. If you haven’t seen it already, go check it out! 

5. Which has the best looking food?

I’m torn between the breakfast scene in Howl’s Moving Castle, and the ramen scene in Ponyo as being top of my list. 

6. Who is your favorite character?

I haven’t mentioned her yet, but Kiki, from Kiki’s Delivery Service! I wasn’t permitted to watch this movie as a kid because super religious family and movies “promoting witchcraft” don’t mix, but saw it as a teenager/early adult and was absolutely blown away. 

I love Kiki’s optimism and spirit, and also the journey she goes through learning to fly again and how I can relate to that when applying it to my life in many ways, which is probably why this movie is still so popular. 

7. Best soundtrack?

Okay, this is probably the most generic answer I can give, but really, Spirited Away and Naussica, of the Valley of the Wind. The OST for Spirited Away transports me instantly back to a place of nostalgia and safety, while Naussica just reminds me of my brother in the most comforting of ways since that one and Castle In the Sky are his favourites. 

[flowerbeom]

50 Questions Tag

Tagged by my resident Kiwi, @prettywordsyouleft, thank you darling. 

1. What takes too much of your time?

Working, writing, dancing. 

2. What makes your day better?

Random things, honestly. Honestly, the other day I saw a man run after his kid after they got out of the car just to give him a hug before going to school - and I melted. But generally speaking, my family, my boyfriend, my pets and good music.

3. What’s the best thing that happened to you today?

Today? I’ve only been awake for two and a half hours, but maybe that I got my winged eyeliner right in one go. 

4. What fictional place would you like to go to?

World of Spirited Away, or Howl’s Moving Castle, or Ponyo, or anything Gbihli related it would seem... 

5. Are you good at giving advice?

Sometimes. Worse at taking it. 

6. Do you have any mental illness?

Mild depression and generalized anxiety. 

7. Have you ever experienced sleep paralysis?

Yep, not as often as I used to. But it’s fucking terrifying every time it happens. 

8. What musician inspired you the most?

Probably Queen and Michael Jackson growing up. Anytime anyone asks that ‘if you could have dinner with any musician” or “if you could see any musician perform live” its always Queen. Without a second’s thought, it’s always Queen. 

9. Have you ever fallen in love?

Three times exactly. 

10. What’s your dream date?

Something understated where we can get to know each other. Whether it’s something chill, like a cafe date, or something fun, like an arcade or carnival; if there’s vibes and chemistry, then I’m all for it. Don’t give me anything of grandeur on the first date, I’ll just think you’re a pompous asshole. 

11. What do others notice about you?

That I can be quite hyper and weird. First to break the ice in hard situations. Essentially the first to jump. 

And that I have a lot of love to give. A lot. You have 100% of my trust at the start, its then you’re job to keep it. 

12. What is an annoying habit you have?

I take on too much and don’t finish them to the fullest. And I don’t put away clean laundry straight away and end up with 2/3 of my closet in a pile. 

13. Do you still talk to your first love?

Well he recently got married, so that’s a hard no. 

14. How many ex’s do you have?

5

15. How many songs are in your playlist?

I don’t know. Probably close to 10k. My music taste is beyond eclectic and the music I listen to changes on the daily, hourly... you get my point. 

16. What instruments can you play?

Piano. Guitar. Bass and Ukelele. 

17. Who do you have the most pictures of?

On my phone? Lim Jaebeom.... 

18. Where would you like to go before you die?

I travel a lot and consider any place I haven’t been to a place I want to do before I die. Sans War Torn countries and New York... I really didn’t like New York. 

19. What is your zodiac?

Cancer

20. Do you relate to it?

I relate to my Myer Briggs more. ENFP  But I found this online and will highlight the things relevant to me..

Strengths: Tenacious, highly imaginative, loyal, emotional, sympathetic, persuasive

Weaknesses: Moody, pessimistic, suspicious, manipulative, insecure

Cancer likes: Art, home-based hobbies, relaxing near or in water, helping loved ones, a good meal with friends

Cancer dislikes: Strangers, any criticism of Mom, revealing of personal life

21. What is happiness to you?

My family, my boyfriend, my friends, my pets, succeeding in a goal and food. 

22. Are you going through anything right now?

Yup. 

23. What’s the worst decision you’ve ever made?

Not being better with money a few years ago. And now I’m really fucking suffering. 

24. What’s your favourite store?

There’s a strip of stores near my work that is practically Korean beauty, fashion and Japanese streetwear. And I frequent that strip a lot. (I seem to always be ironically dressed by Jaebeom, even though I’m older and have rocked my style for close to 16 years.... )

25. What’s your opinion on abortion?

It’s a personal choice. But I am of the camp of if you’re a firm believer that you won’t be able to take care of that child, or it’s absolutely the wrong time for you have a child, then you should not let that child suffer. I’ve had very long discussions with my partner about it, and we both believe that if it’s right, then it’s right. 

26. Do you keep a bucket list?

Not really. I’m more of the ‘if you want to do it, then do it’ mentality. I can be very narrow minded. 

27. Do you have a favourite album?

Hmmmm. Let’s dive into the back catalogues shall we?  A Night At The Opera - Queen Thriller - Michael Jackson A Fever You Can’t Sweat Out - Panic! At The Disco Verse 2 - JJ Project Focus - JUS2

28. What do you want for your birthday?

To have a big dinner with my family. I used to want a lot when I was younger, always useless things. But as I got older I just want to spend time with my family. 

29. What are most people’s first impression of you?

That I’m a conversationalist. 

30. What age do you seem according to most people?

At least 3-4 years younger than I actually am. I got voted as a 21 year old the other week. It made my 27 year old ass real happy. 

31. Where do you keep your phone while you’re sleeping?

Charging on the bedside table. 

32. what word do you say the most?

Like. But. Umm..

33. What’s the oldest age you would date?

I never really thought about age. I’ve been with my partner for 7 years and we met when I was 21. (he was actually my birthday present, but that’s a story for another time) and he was 24. We’re never going to date anyone else ever again, so this doesn’t really apply. 

34. What’s the youngest age you would date?

Again, doesn’t apply.

35. What job/career do most people say would suit you?

According to a lot of people: writer, journalist, comedian

36. What’s your favourite music genre?

RnB, Alternative, Kpop - but not all Kpop... like Kpop is an industry... I don’t know... 

37. If you could live in any country in the world, where would it be?

Japan.

38. What is your current favourite song?

Currently? LOL. Just One Day - BTS

39. How long have you had this blog for?

Some time in June, 2018

40. What are you excited for?

Heading to Auckland in a month for a dodgeball tournament. 

41. Are you a better talker or listener?

I sit in the middle of both. 

42. What is the last productive thing you did?

I meal prepped lunch for the week and wrote 4k words of Chapter 5 of When I See You. 

43. What do you want for Christmas?

No idea. I never know this early in the year. 

44. What class do you get the best grades in?

English and English Literature. 

45. On a scale of 1-10, how are you feeling right now?

7.33

46. What can you see yourself doing in 10 years?  

Ahhhh..... not being a financial fuck up...

47. When did you first get your heartbreak?

About 2 years ago, I almost screwed up my relationship with my current partner. I really hurt him and thought we’d never get through. But we did, and I’ll never forget what I did to almost end us. 

48. At what age do you want to get married?

Ummm.. I thought I’d be married by now. So let’s not have this conversation shall we... 

49. What career did you want to have as a child?

Teacher or Chef. 

50. What do you crave right now?

Sleep. 

- - - - - 

Tagging: @urlocalkpoptrash @sunshinesmilehobi @jacksonurs @pjmlog @juruwu @reveluv-army @got7-markjinson @ijustwantacue @katdefbeom 

[fymoanstax]

Monsta X as Professors

This was not requested but Admin Ponyo just,,,,,,thought of it. Hope you guys enjoy!

Shownu

Teaches Political Science

‘You can call me Hyunwoo or Mr. H I don’t really care just don’t call me sir because it makes me feel old’

Monotone voice makes you want to fall asleep during lecture

Gives direct answers to exams

If the question is like ‘when was the declaration of independence signed?’

On the study guide/exam review it’ll say ‘make sure you know the day the declaration was signed’

Easy A class

Doesn’t take attendance bc there are like 200 people in class

Every day is casual friday

Dresses more like a student

Arrives to class late sometimes

No homework

He’s the professor where you’re kind of like ‘should I be having these thoughts about him?’

Sometimes he'll just put on Law and Order™ because its it's too much of a hassle to actually teach that day

On the first day of class he asked in the middle if the students wanted to take a break for 20 minutes or just keep going and get out of class early.

Gives out candy on review days

Despite seeming like he doesn't care he wants his students to be socially aware and active in politics

Really raising the next generation of leaders 11/10 would take this class

Wonho

Teaches education courses

But he also Handles 1st year seminars

Makes people call him coach for no reason

Very inspirational

Female students swoon over him

Wears dress pants and dress shirts and dress shoes

BUT NO BLAZER OR JACKET OR ANYTHING

Rolls up his sleeves a lil

You know those biceps are LI VINg

‘I can be your mentor’ (du du du du du du du du, get it. Like,,,,,’i can be your hero’ okay nvm)

Always comes into class right on the dot

Lectures include a lot of uplifting quotes

Has powerpoints with cute animations, transitions and lots of videos

Stays behind after class and is surrounded by students wanting to talk to him

Has a good rating on ratemyprofessor plus a whole chili pepper bc lots of people take his class

No phones in class because he wants everyone to pay attention but newsflash they already are

No electronics in general

Says attendance doesn't count but passes around a sign in sheet bc he wants to make sure people that show up are rewarded

Minhyuk

Teaches nutrition courses

Wears tracksuits to class

Talks about staying healthy and eating well but shows up late to class with burger king

Has never been to a gym unless pokemon go counts

When people go to his office hours they find him playing overwatch

Gives a lot of extra credit

Makes twitter deals with his students

‘If this post gets 100k retweets our professor will give us all As’

Assigns homework randomly

Next class he has forgotten he assigned homework at all

Until a student brings it up

‘Did I assign that? Okay yeah hand it in then.’

Gives everyone As for the sake of not grading

Actually forgets to grade entire exams

Tells students when pop quizzes will happen

‘Well we’re gonna have a pop quiz this week and if its not today then it must be,,,,the only other time we meet this week.’ *wink*

Asks students to call him the Italian Stallion despite not being Italian or a stallion.

Asks everyone how their weekend was and really does want some stories.

*finished a chapter like 15 minutes early* “You guys want to stop here?”

Group work all the time

He likes it because even he learns from it

Kihyun

Math professor

High level math like calc 2 or smth

Wears suits to class

Doesn’t give study guides or do review days

Homework every week

Only 6 questions

1a, 1b, 1c, 1d, 1e, 1f, 1g, 1h, 1i, 1j, 1k, 1l…….you know

Has never cancelled a class

Gives you dirty look if you walk out of class early

‘We still have 45 seconds of class don’t pack up’

Syllabus is 15 pages long

No calculators allowed

‘You learned this in math 126 so i won’t go over it’ UH YEAH 3 SEMESTERS AND AN ENTIRE SUMMER AGO BOI

Asks for homework at the beginning of class

Before you even walk in

If it’s not in your hand no points for the day

Takes attendance daily + counts as 20% of grade

Only allowed 1 excused absence with note

Always bashes the rival university by using said university as the bad examples in word problems.

“Professor what does this have to do with math"

“Nothing I just hate (insert university here)”

At the end of the semester he said “I should have called you guys worms and then at the end said ‘congratulations you are all now maggots’"

Tough professor but everyone loves him still

Hyungwon

Teaches classes on law

ALWAYS has his hair styled and his suit looking pristine

Fashionably late is reAL for this man

Student: ‘I heard if the professor doesn’t show up for 15 minutes we can le-...’

Hyungwon: ‘You can leave whenever. Nobody’s stopping you’

*INSERT SASSY WALK AWAY*

Takes like 10 minutes to get settled before starting lecture

Carries a briefcase to class to look professional but its empty

Students fear him

His beauty AND his brains

Tells class that there will be pop quizzes

Never has a pop quiz in the entire semester

Mock trials every week

Will destroy his students during mock trials but its for their own good

‘There’s too much traffic so I’m cancelling class’

Helps students practice their law poker face by making memey faces at them

It’s part of the final

Laugh or smile is minus 10 points

During an exam he stopped everyone so he could show them a meme.

Jooheon

Teaches music appreciation

Students call him sir

He thinks its funny

One page syllabus and all you do is sign and return it

Asks his students for new music suggestions

Goes off on tangents about his life

‘Yeah, last week I adopted a new dog and his name is Bark Obama’

Will show you videos of his dog on FACEBOOK

When he goes off on tangents he stops mid story and says “why am I telling you this? I dont know”

Dances in front of the class

Will dance to anything

Gregorian chants

Clair de lune

Anything by Chopin

Always wears a hat to class bc he changes his hair color often but that’s seen as unprofessional

Is always down to sit and talk about some good songe

‘Appreciate the music’

‘Feel the music’

‘BE THE MUSIC’

Once his students walked in and he was playing All Star by Smash Mouth and he claimed it was “because if he didnt hear it now it would be stuck in his head forever"

Changkyun

Biology professor

Syllabus is riddled with biology puns

*walks into class* ‘The name’s bond. Hydrogen bond. Just kidding I’m your professor Im Changkyun’

Doesn’t know how to spell,,,,,,,,,,,,,proffesor,,,,,,,proffessor,,,,,,professor,,,,,,,,,

Sits on his desk at the front of the class while lecturing

Relates to his students

The professor you will accidentally run into on the street

Or at coachella who knows

Guaranteed to break at least one microscope or test tube during the semester

Shows the class he can rap the beginning of nicki minaj’s super bass perfectly

Won’t stop talking about his friends dog Bark Obama

Gossips about other professors

A genuinely great teacher

Cares about his students

Wants them to succeed

Wants them to thank him in their speeches when they win awards for ground breaking discoveries

‘All you have to say is I owe all I know to my old professor Im Changkyun. It’s not that hard Kenny.’

Everything went wrong at a lab once when he was a TA and he got so done he just cancelled the lab. He had no fear of getting in trouble

Has puns on his slides that nobody understands.

‘Biology is the best science. Physics and Chemistry can choke but go off I guess.’

Sometimes doesnt wear shoes in class

[crispclown]

tagged by @aurorallura!

rules: answer these 85 things then tag 20 people

tagging @bladeofolympus @megasillyellie @theory-box @eztria and whoever else wants to (idk who did this yet so feel free to ignore me)

THE LAST:

1. drink: water

2. phone call: my dad 

3. text message: a beautiful photo of one of my amazing cats hanging out on the couch 

4. song you listened to: stay by knitting giant beanies

5. time you cried: idk, i don’t really keep track of that kinda shit my dude

6. dated someone twice: nah

7. kissed someone and regretted it: i haven’t kissed someone period

8. been cheated on: nope

9. lost someone special: yes

10. been depressed: haha.........

11. gotten drunk and thrown up: alcohol tastes gross as fuck dude

THREE FAVORITE COLORS:

12. blue

13. red

14. purple

IN THE LAST YEAR HAVE YOU:

15. made new friends: yeye

16. fallen out of love: kind of? it’s just like. more chill and barely noticeably now

17. laughed until you cried: ye

18. found out someone was talking about you: yeah, kids in my art class are assholes man. i almost punched the dude tbh

19. met someone who changed you: yes?

20. found out who your friends are: the fuck does that mean?

21. kissed someone on your Facebook list: i don’t have facebook tho

GENERAL:

22. how many of your Facebook friends do you know in real life: i..... don’t have facebook???

23. do you have any pets: two beautiful and amazing cats named thomas and bridget 

24. do you want to change your name: legal name, ya

25. what did you do for your last birthday: i watched beauty & the beast with my irl friends at the theaters

26. what time do you wake up: depends on season and if i’m currently have school or other plans

27. what were you doing at midnight last night: drawing some oc ideas after having a horror letsplays marathon 

28. name something you can’t wait for: being able to use mars instead of my real name next year in school, thankfully my parents don’t seem to notice i’m not cis somehow??? also being open about my gender without having to worry about being kicked out of my house haha

29. when was the last time you saw your mom: yesterday

31. what are you listening to right now: some cicadas i think

32. have you ever talked to a person named tom: yes but he was my mom’s coworker

33. something that is getting on your nerves: assholes, especially those who are super open about how much they hate the lgbta+ community 

34. most visited website: flightrising 

35. hair color: a dark brown

36. long or short hair: short

37. do you have a crush on someone: eh

38. what do you like about yourself: idk dude

39. piercings: none

40. blood type: i dunno never found out

41. nickname: lots but the most common one is mars

42. relationship status: single and wanting to take a nap

43. zodiac: pisces

45. favourite tv show: transformers prime

46. tattoos: don’t got any

47. right or left handed: right

48. surgery: not yet

50. sport: i played soccer for a while

51. vacation: somewhere not crowded as hell and pretty

52. pair of trainers: ????? 

MORE GENERAL:

53. eating: salt & vinegar chips and ramen

54. drinking: this one soda brand that’s in japanese but i’m on my laptop rn so i can’t type the name, rip

55. I’m about to: try to draw

56. waiting for: the day i can leave

57. want: adventures and happiness

58. get married: i guess

59. career: artist or biologist

WHICH IS BETTER:

60. hugs or kisses: hugs

61. lips or eyes: eyes

62. shorter or taller: either

63. older or younger: idc

64. nice arms or nice stomach: both are good for hugs

65. hook up or relationship: relationship

66. troublemaker or hesitant: hesitant

HAVE YOU EVER:

67. kissed a stranger: no?? why would i

68. drank hard liquor: idk i once sipped beer but decided never again

69. lost glasses/contact lenses: who hasn’t really

70. turned someone down: yes?

71. sex on the first date: nope

72. broken someone’s heart: i.. don’t know?

73. had your heart broken: ya

74. been arrested: not yet thankfully

75. cried when someone died: n..o?

76. fallen for a friend: yeah

DO YOU BELIEVE IN:

77. yourself: ha... ha........

78. miracles: kind of neutral on them

79. love at first sight: haha nope. maybe ‘wow they’re pretty’ but not love

80. santa claus: he’ll live on in my heart,,,

81. kiss on the first date: seems kind of rushed

82. angels: ....

OTHER:

83. current best friend’s name: autumn

84. eye color: brown

85. favorite movie: kubo and the two strings & ponyo

[highglossfinish]

Song of the Sea

AKA, the most charming tale of child endangerment, mythology, and animals without necks ever to grace stream night.

Welcome to the 'highglossfinish' room. Shockbox changed their nickname to TA. TA: Good evening. Thenightetc: Hello! Knock Out: Hello, everyone! Thebes: Hi! Thenightetc: ...What is this Knock Out: Art. TA: ..... TA: You're not wrong. Knock Out: How's everyone doing this evening? Thenightetc: Pretty good.  I crossed something annoying off my to-do list Knock Out: Excellent. TA: Geez. This is cute. Thenightetc: Oooo, so this is about selkies! Knock Out: Isn't it? Thebes: I remember hearing about this!~ TA: Such a soft art style. Thenightetc: So pretty. Thenightetc: oh no Knock Out: I like these creatures. They're fat. Knock Out: Oh, eat exhaust! Knock Out: So much for being the best big brother ever. Thenightetc: wow CaffienatedConfetti: yes CaffienatedConfetti: this is good Thenightetc: ...wooooow CaffienatedConfetti: NO CaffienatedConfetti: BAD Knock Out: You know, maybe she's better off with the seals. Thenightetc: Maybe. CaffienatedConfetti: well duh CaffienatedConfetti: i love this movie Knock Out: Dear Unicron! CaffienatedConfetti: yes it is CaffienatedConfetti: Sad Dad (tm) Thenightetc: that shadow CaffienatedConfetti: because following the little glowing lights is alwaqys a good idea Knock Out: She can only do better than where she is. CaffienatedConfetti: yeah the brother is kind of evil, but children are just that way CaffienatedConfetti: OH! SELKIE COAT Thenightetc: Ohhhhh my Knock Out: This is painfully pure. CaffienatedConfetti: yes, v pure Knock Out: Oh, the fat seals! Thebes: seeeeals CaffienatedConfetti: and now she seal CaffienatedConfetti: see? CaffienatedConfetti: ickle seal Knock Out: Nothing has any right to be this adorable. CaffienatedConfetti: it gets sad quick CaffienatedConfetti: and the owls come Knock Out: Of course they do. CaffienatedConfetti: and that witchy lady takes the coat, if i rmember correctly Knock Out: She smelled joy. It's what owls do. CaffienatedConfetti: oh, it was the dad? CaffienatedConfetti: huh CaffienatedConfetti: OH MY GOD CaffienatedConfetti: DUDE Thenightetc: ohhhhh dear CaffienatedConfetti: WHY DID YOU DO THAT Knock Out: Alright, we're solving this right ow. Knock Out: *now CaffienatedConfetti: lol Knock Out: Well, that accomplished nothing. Thenightetc: oh nooooo Knock Out: I see what you mean about this getting grim. CaffienatedConfetti: just wait CaffienatedConfetti: it CaffienatedConfetti: gets CaffienatedConfetti: worseeeeeeeee Knock Out: There we are. End of problem. Thenightetc: noooooo, the puppy Knock Out: Every animal in this movie lacks a neck. How is that so charming? CaffienatedConfetti: everything without a nexk is charming. why do you thik babies have survived this long Knock Out: Because your species keeps making them? Thenightetc: Because you go to jail if you throw them down a well Knock Out: Hmm, good point. CaffienatedConfetti: it's because they dont have necks you dumbo CaffienatedConfetti: it's virtually impossible to strangle them CaffienatedConfetti: ...did i type that out loud CaffienatedConfetti: mark my words, that parrot will be eaten CaffienatedConfetti: i think Knock Out: Ah, ah. Spoilers. CaffienatedConfetti: oh god, small child logic is coming into play Thebes: well it has to do with fairy tales, why not child logic CaffienatedConfetti: wrong coat, friends Knock Out: Ugh...owls. Thenightetc: shut up you're like ten CaffienatedConfetti: Big Bro the Exhaust Hole CaffienatedConfetti: ASSHATTERY BACKFIRED, I REPEAT, BACKFIRED Knock Out: HAH! CaffienatedConfetti: hey, KO, have you seen Secret of Kells? Knock Out: I haven't. Is it any good? CaffienatedConfetti: It's by the same people as this CaffienatedConfetti: and it is amazing CaffienatedConfetti: but very scary Knock Out: Owls ruin everything. CaffienatedConfetti: OWLS CaffienatedConfetti: QUICK, GRAB THE CRUCIFIX CaffienatedConfetti: WAIT, NEVERMIND! CUTE OLD MEN TO THE RESCUE CaffienatedConfetti: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO Thenightetc: oh noooo CaffienatedConfetti: ONE OF THEM IS LITERALLY A RAINBOW CaffienatedConfetti: anyway, secret of kells is amazing and beautiful! most of it is about this kid who wants to draw those beautiful book pages with the colorful patterns CaffienatedConfetti: and a forest girl CaffienatedConfetti: and a cat CaffienatedConfetti: and vikings CaffienatedConfetti: the evil older bro has a point CaffienatedConfetti: oh god CaffienatedConfetti: foreboding forest Knock Out: Well, this can only end with a couple of dead children. CaffienatedConfetti: more specifically, one dead child and a very annoyed little girl Knock Out: Even better. Thenightetc: IS IT THE DOG Thenightetc: omg CaffienatedConfetti: who is far more capable than her older brother CaffienatedConfetti: DOG CaffienatedConfetti: DOG Thenightetc: ...It looks like an owl CaffienatedConfetti: good job leaving your sister in the dust, afthole Knock Out: I'd be amazed if that wasn't intentional. Knock Out: The owl, not aft child. CaffienatedConfetti: if the girl dies i will be pissed Thenightetc: ...Does she still have the shell, though? CaffienatedConfetti: aww, he has some humanity CaffienatedConfetti: i think afthole took it CaffienatedConfetti: see, there it is Thenightetc: Ahhh. CaffienatedConfetti: CU IS BETTER AT OUR JOB THAN YOU, CHILD CaffienatedConfetti: HE IS A DOG CaffienatedConfetti: *YOUR CaffienatedConfetti: OWLS CaffienatedConfetti: EVIL OWLS Thenightetc: nothing bad had better happen to that dog CaffienatedConfetti: SCARY OLD MAN CREATURE CaffienatedConfetti: basically, magic human ratchet CaffienatedConfetti: except dorkier CaffienatedConfetti: except dorkier CaffienatedConfetti: lol double my bad Knock Out: And not existing between spark attacks. CaffienatedConfetti: dude CaffienatedConfetti: not cool Knock Out: But not wrong. Thenightetc: ...dude CaffienatedConfetti: seriously CaffienatedConfetti: anyway, Crazy Old Man Helps Knock Out: Thank you, Crazy Old Man and your hole full of hair. CaffienatedConfetti: that sounded dirty CaffienatedConfetti: oh my god Thenightetc: :< CaffienatedConfetti: my joke was smothered to death by sadness CaffienatedConfetti: OH CaffienatedConfetti: OWL LADY HOUSE CaffienatedConfetti: KNOCKOUT THE OWLS CaffienatedConfetti: SO MANY\ Knock Out: DON'T GO IN. Knock Out: THERE MIGHT BE OWLS. CaffienatedConfetti: hey hunger CaffienatedConfetti: they hunger CaffienatedConfetti: 3d galsses make you stronger apparently CaffienatedConfetti: OWL WITCH CaffienatedConfetti: OH MY CaffienatedConfetti: DON'T TRUST HER CaffienatedConfetti: SHE HAS OWL EYES CaffienatedConfetti: OWLS SUCK THE FEELING OUT OF YE CaffienatedConfetti: OH GOD CaffienatedConfetti: OH GOOOOODS CaffienatedConfetti: SWEET PRIMJS CaffienatedConfetti: BANISH THE OWL DEMO0N CaffienatedConfetti: SILENCED BY DOG BUTT Thenightetc: ...might have been better to get her coat first Knock Out: Probably, yes. CaffienatedConfetti: nice owl lady? CaffienatedConfetti: nice owl lady! CaffienatedConfetti: REDEMPTION Knock Out: Well, logically, he IS half selkie too. Thenightetc: Yeah. Thenightetc: good dog Thenightetc: best friend CaffienatedConfetti: this is what animation at its best looks like Knock Out: No arguments here. CaffienatedConfetti: i'm crying CaffienatedConfetti: literally CaffienatedConfetti: this is what i want to do when i get older CaffienatedConfetti: i want to tell stories like this Thenightetc: auuugh CaffienatedConfetti: akhjhkjbn CaffienatedConfetti: i want to hug my mom Thebes: that was so good CaffienatedConfetti: i mean, look at those painted backgrounds CaffienatedConfetti: the days upon months upon years it must have taken Knock Out: ...I mean, I would have taken immortality as a seal over life with a family who only started loving me twelve hours ago, but to each their own. CaffienatedConfetti: dude don't ruin this for me Thenightetc: Shhhhh. Thenightetc: That was amazing CaffienatedConfetti: the lighthouse reminds me of ponyo CaffienatedConfetti: i love this movie CaffienatedConfetti: speaking of ponyo- WATCH GHIBLI, KNOCKOUT Knock Out: I've seen that one! Impact likes it! CaffienatedConfetti: yes but has she seen CaffienatedConfetti: TOTORO Knock Out: Many, many times. CaffienatedConfetti: giant fluffy monster Thenightetc: ...*I* haven't seen that one. CaffienatedConfetti: i grew up on ghibli Thenightetc: *extremely sad look* Knock Out: ...Well, I know what we're watching next stream night. CaffienatedConfetti: ...OH! howl's moving castle! CaffienatedConfetti: castle in tyhe sky!!! CaffienatedConfetti: SECRET WORLD OF ARIETTY! CaffienatedConfetti: NOSTALGIA!!!! Thenightetc: (next stream night I'll probably have to miss because I'll probably have work, but) CaffienatedConfetti: PRINCESS MONONOKEEEE CaffienatedConfetti: cough sorry got carried away CaffienatedConfetti: you leaving, night? Thenightetc: (...Wait, actually, looks like I'm off at six on the ninth!) Knock Out: Beautiful! CaffienatedConfetti: yes CaffienatedConfetti: right stream oveer CaffienatedConfetti: augh CaffienatedConfetti: emotions Knock Out: Thank you all for coming! Thenightetc: Thank you for streaming this! CaffienatedConfetti: BYEEE Thenightetc: It was incredible :) Knock Out: My pleasure! I wasn't expecting to enjoy this one so much! CaffienatedConfetti: *LEANS IN* *WHISPERS* GHIBLIIIIIIII CaffienatedConfetti: SECRET OF KELLLLLS