#my dreams tend to be like thiss

[justaflyintooka]

Just fought a moss monster with two broken clothes hangers in my dream. Kinda used them like i was in a lightsaber duel. Also I‘ve ridden a bug, aliens built a machine to control sea currents and I‘ve made a plot to overthrow a medieval fantasy government. And that‘s just half of it.

[laissez-fire-oh]

Despite the fact that your profile picture is a sunflower you do remind me of a sunflower field or just thiss… vast area of clean existence like this:

I don’t have a question but I would like to get a message from my ancestors or whoever is willing or the most eager to reach out to me, thank you-Jsm🐰👒🍀

Hello dear!! Thank you, that is soo awesome<3

I think your message is about letting go and enjoying a but more the ride. You may have tended to be a little more strict and harsh in the last period with yourself? Take time for yourself, watch a movie, take care of your body and soul/emotions. Dreams may be important. You are aligned with your path and good things will come. Also, Virgo moon may be of importance? It could be an important or someone with those characteristics coming for you.

Take care<3

[dorotheian]

@ariaste

#good omens #nesting #wingfic #preening #erogenous zone: wings #escalated quickly #angels ‘making an effort’ #dubiously explicit???

Aziraphale preened—no, not in the sense that he basked in compliments. Though he did quite like giving and receiving compliments, that he couldn’t deny. No, at this moment he was running his fingers through the feathers of his wings with zenlike concentration, looking for any that snagged or were out of place, and plucking the ones that were nearly loose already, until his wings gleamed and the feathers rippled in patterns of perfection. The soothing activity tended to drive out any thoughts that might yet be lingering in his head.

It had taken long enough to become aware that the urge to preen intensified whenever he was around Crowley. He wanted to look presentable for Crowley, of course, but that didn’t fully explain it. Neither did nervousness. Crowley didn’t make Aziraphale nervous, though he certainly could have that effect on other people. It was true that Crowley sometimes gave him butterflies in his stomach, but he also gave him stomach flops, stomach drops, and stomach clenches... Life became very visceral around Crowley, mostly because Crowley had a talent for worming his way into tight spots that no mortal would escape alive, but Aziraphale had no fear of him. Only, when he dared to admit it, for him, sometimes, but it was rarely warranted.

On this afternoon they had eaten a substantial lunch at one of Aziraphale’s favorite cozy retreats that specialized in home-cooking. Aziraphale had started the preening procedure before he was supposed to meet Crowley, but he ran out of time to stall and prepare, and had been forced to stuff the erstwhile white feathers in his pockets or tuck them in his hair or the folds of his clothes. It probably made him look ridiculous, and he felt very flustered, but Crowley had seemed to like it. All he’d said was, “Had a nice molt?” and Aziraphale blushed and stammered “of course” though it was nothing of the kind. It wasn’t even the right season for it, but had Aziraphale told him that? No.

He wondered what he could say in a few years when he next noticed Crowley was about to shed his skin. It was an itchy process that, in human form, made his skin pinken and peel as if he was recovering from a large sunburn, and made Crowley even more tetchy and adorable until it all came off and his skin suddenly became lucent and baby-soft to the touch. On second thought...it probably wouldn’t be a good idea to draw his attention to it... Crowley could be sensitive.

Now Crowley was napping beneath an apple tree to sleep off the heavy meal, and Aziraphale was going mad over the state of his wings, which should have been perfectly, thoroughly groomed already, and hoped against hope that Crowley wouldn’t wake up until he finished. Aziraphale hated being watched. Grooming was personal, and this was getting...this was getting... absurd. Why couldn’t he stop?

When he came back to himself he shook his wings briskly to be sure that the ritual was well and truly finished. He didn’t quite trust the vague, smug sense of satisfaction he felt... the madness was just waiting to pounce on him again. Aziraphale sighed.

There ended up being an alarmingly large pile of feathers beside him and Crowley, who was just lying there on the cold hard ground. Aziraphale felt a wave of indignation. That had to be uncomfortable. He walked around him restlessly. If only he could prop him up without waking him. Well—for that matter, how much could he do without waking him?

Aziraphale pulled out a handful of feathers from his pocket, shrugged to himself, and got to work. He tucked them under Crowley’s head, and edged them inwards all around his body. He had already made quite a foot-wide halo around him when Crowley stirred. Aziraphale froze, feeling as if he had been caught at something deeply forbidden, and fought the urge to run or explode back into the heavens. He hovered.

Crowley picked up a white feather between his fingers and squinted at it. “Errr...what’s this?” He patted the ground around him—soft—and sat up, looking confused. “A nest? Aziraphale?”

The world went soundless and quiet, except for the sound of Aziraphale’s heart beating powerfully in his ears. He dropped the remaining feathers in his hand where he stood, turned his back to Crowley, and drew his wings as tightly in as he could.

Crowley turned his head and said softly, “Angel?”

Aziraphale sat abruptly and wrapped his arms around his thighs, letting his legs cover his face.

A tentative hand touched his back. “Angel? All you all right?”

No, it was not all right. He did not know what he had been doing, only that it was important to him and his heart would break if Crowley rejected it.

The hand drew small circles on Aziraphale’s back, right between the shoulderblades and the point between his wings. Crowley touched with only the soft tips of his fingers. Slowly, Aziraphale let himself relax and he laughed at himself under his breath.

“If you’re done twisting yourself into knots,” Crowley said, his voice affectionate and sounding oddly far away, as if he had been dreaming of this for a long time, “would you let me...touch your wings?”

Aziraphale let them unfold at his request. Crowley picked through them at first rather clinically, rather like a vet, maybe, or someone leafing through pages of books, until he felt familiar and he found the right spot. He put his palm to the spot, underneath the feathers, and Aziraphale’s whole body sagged and tilted to the side. Crowley snatched his hand back hastily and cocked his head. “Perhaps, ah, would you rather lie down, instead? I’ve been napping like an inanimate lump here afternoon; you should make yourself comfortable.”

Aziraphale nodded and lay face down with his hands lightly set on the ground in front of him. Crowley straddled his back, and Aziraphale was suffused by a wave of pleasure. “Just let me know if it’s too much, if you want me to stop, or if you need more pointed pressure,” said Crowley. “I’ve never groomed anyone else’s wings before.”

Aziraphale made a tiny inadvertent groan.

“Yes, yes, of course I’ll get on with it. Angel.” Where Crowley stroked, Aziraphale leaned into the touch, the tips of his feathers quivering unsteadily.

“It shouldn’t feel this good,” Aziraphale whispered. “I’ve always taken care of—”

Crowley continued to knead Aziraphale’s upper wings and back, and said in a low, seductive voice, “That’s where you’re wrong.” Crowley must have felt provoked, because he pressed his lips possessively to the back of Aziraphale’s neck, and Aziraphale twisted and gasped, “No, don’t stop!”

“I wouldn’t dream of it, Angel.” Crowley pressed a row of kisses into his neck and down his spine, and stroked beneath his primaries at the same time. Aziraphale’s wings heaved and flexed. “I didn’t realize how...dynamic...”

Aziraphale let out a little cry.

“...staying on top of you would be. Ahh, you’re very powerful.” Crowley’s snake tongue flicked out, touching the top of Aziraphale’s ear, and Aziraphale’s hips bucked. Crowley wriggled and rolled with the movement, pushed himself up again, and buried his fingers beneath the feathers, gripping the wings firmly, and rubbed with both thumbs.

“Harder,” Aziraphale gasped, grinding himself into the earth.

“I’m afraid I’m ssstretched to my limit already,” Crowley admitted, “There’s only ssssso much I can reacccch— but I’ll try.” He adjusted his position, and squeezed.

“Unh,” said Aziraphale, collapsing, and seized hold of the grass before he bucked again and his wings nearly threw Crowley when they caught him by surprise.

“Good,” said Crowley, panting. He manifested his own black wings, fighting to stay on top of him. Aziraphale threw himself to the side, briefly pinning Crowley, and flung himself back again, slithering so they were face-to-face.

Crowley gripped Aziraphale by the shoulders. “Are you sssure? At thiss rate we’ll really...”

Aziraphale pulled his face down for a deep kiss and tangled their legs together, wings thumping wildly against the ground, throwing up dust, turning the pure white of his wings a light sandy brown. “Shhh.”

“Ngkkkk,” said Crowley, squirming closer, and scented the air, flicking Aziraphale’s ear again. Arching, Aziraphale threw his head back. “All this trouble... just because you’re nessssting....”

“Is that what they....call it?” mumbled Aziraphale, letting his arms lie limp against the ground. “I had...no idea...”

Crowley nudged a knee between Aziraphale’s legs and grinned, showing his teeth. “I’m home to you. You’re home to me. You don’t....get out of thissss....sssssssso easssily....”

“You fucking rhymed,” Aziraphale choked, with unabashed delight, and blushed. “Oh, Crowley.”

Crowley thrummed his wings and hissed for good measure. “Sssshut up.”

“I love you,” said Aziraphale, and tightened his—her?—thighs around Crowley’s body. Aziraphale was making a special effort, and that signaled a change in intent, or desire…

Crowley’s wings clapped together and he shouted in surprise when Aziraphale flipped them over once more. “Ahh...more slowly?” Crowley said, from beneath Aziraphale, as he awkwardly straightened his wings against the ground.

“Yes,” said Aziraphale, beaming, and bent to kiss him. “Crowley, you are lovely.” She raked long curls askew, flinging them back from her face.

Crowley squirmed, more out of acute embarrassment at the compliment, and her attention, than the desire to get in a better position, though he did need that, too. “A-a-angel…”

“Yes?”

“Sssslower….” Crowley squirmed again.

Aziraphale flushed. “It’s the gender change, isn’t it? I-I-I got too into it, suddenly, and…”

Crowley shook his head, cutting her off with a finger against her lips. “Don’t! Don’t apologize.” Crowley lifted a hand to her breast, brushing his thumb across her nipple through her clothes, almost tenderly, and shook his head. “One thing at a time.” He felt pensive. “I need to think.”

“And I always said you were the fast one,” Aziraphale laughed, leaning closer, and Crowley brushed his other hand through her lengthening white hair.

“You want kids? Little angels? Is that it?”

“No! No, I don’t know what I want,” Aziraphale laughed. “Just you.”

No kids, then, if Aziraphale did not wish for them and open a womb. “A home, I think,” said Crowley, and kissed her.

“Yes, our home.” Aziraphale sat back, preening. “Where should it be?”

“Traditionally, amongst the stars,” said Crowley wryly. “Where this works better. Easier to concentrate on flying without gravity, or falling.”

Aziraphale laughed, bright and vibrant. “But it’s so much rougher and more rewarding here, contending with gravity! I had such fun!”

The struggle did seem to be part of the point. Crowley smiled. “Show me.”

Aziraphale did.

[cindeihf]

Goodbye 23, hello 24!

Hi. Today is 18 Sep 2021, a day before I finally turn 24 years old. I'm writing this a bit earlier that I usually do.

In the past, I write this letter to myself before midnight or a couple of hours before my birthday. However, this time I have a lot of time in my hands. I'm on the 10th day of quarantine since I got positive result from RT-PCR test. Yes, I got infected by the COVID-19 virus but rest assured I am well and getting enough rest. I had a very mild case of headache and that's just it.

Anyways, enough of the intro and let's recall the past year and what it was like to 23-yr-old Cindy. Hmmm I remember vividly, last time, I celebrated my birthday at Nature's Village, Bacolod. We were on a deployment, and of course I was sad on my birthday because again, I was away from my home. 🥺🥲 Nevertheless, my close friends were able to send me gifts and birthday which was enough to lift up my spirits. And days later, our team had a simple pool celebration for us, September babies. I kind of drunk myself 🥺 sorry. I just wanted to release the loneliness by having such a good time with the team. I behaved well, Kim was there to help me tend to my needs. She was such a strong drinker. Haha and honestly, I truly appreciated their small gestures of caring. I mean, it was a fun group. I kinda miss them now. I don't usually get attached to people knowing we would eventually go our separate ways, but with them I definitely had sepanx. 🥲🥺 I miss you guys. See you when I see you!

A month after my birthday, I broke up with him. I was finally free of a relationship that wasn't healthy for me and the other person.

"Thank you, still. And best of luck to you!"

Eventually, we had to go back to Cebu to continue our deployment. There I met him. Idk but was it fate? Char, I wasn't really looking and I wasn't planning to be in a relationship or anything. We just enjoyed talking a lot and we had major similarities. He was like a male version of me but more behaved (🤪 because I'm not that good and kind, I'm just trying to be in everything I do) And honestly, I saw potential in him. 🥺 It was too early for anything so we had to take a pause and slow down. There was no need to rush because if it is meant to be, it will be. So far, I'm still behaved. I mean, sometimes I send replies to guys wanting my attention but I just get bored and eventually ditch them. 😅 It appears like I'm not interested in relationships for a while now. Or maybe it's because I'm only interested in him? Char Hahahahaha

Anw, after several months, I got back to Clark Air Base, and lived a normal military life in a military hospital. It was surprisingly good. I had new good friends and eventually got comfortable there. I actually saw myself staying there for a couple of years. One of my prayers was to have a good company, and God answered me. 🥺❤ Small group but definitely worth keeping. Special mention to this new friend, beshywap @Adie. Thank you beshywap. Hahaha honestly I didn't think I'll have another close friend yet I found myself opening up to you. 😁 big thanks!

And also I forgot to mention that my application with PAFOCC was an up and down situation. It got my hopes high then got rejected and finally was given a 2nd chance. Indeed, it was perfect for a birthday gift. 🥺🙏 Hoping for my application to go well. Always your will, Lord. Yours alone.

Soooooo it's time to say goodbye to you 23 yr old Synd. 🥺You don't get to usually hear thiss from yourself, so I'm gonna say it.

"Good job, Synd! Be proud of your accomplishments. Be proud of yourself. No one but you, can appreciate yourself truly. Learn to love yourself and accept your flaws because that makes you who you are. You don't need to be perfect in anyone's eye, because God has seen how imperfect you are and has loved you anyway. 🥺❤"

I realized that your biggest lesson this past year was not getting scared of taking risks. May it be in romantic relationships, friendships and career. You will definitely feel a rollercoaster of emotions but that's all part of the circus of life! Be happy, laugh out loud, get hurt, get drunk and cry to your hearts content. Just be your most honest and sincerest self. That way you will see, the genuine side of people and you will be less cynical. 😊

———

On the other note, step by step, malapit mo nang matupad yung pangarap mo. Isang hagdan na lang, nandun ka na. Ang amazing ni Lord, diba? Akala mo yun na yun. That's the end of your dream. Pero look at you now, you're given another chance. By His grace, at age 25, you will have reached your final goal sa career mo and ready to settle ka na for the next chapter of your life. It seemed like He has planned it all for you na diba? You just have to trust in Him.

But before that, yung dream mo to give your parents a comfortable life is on it's way. 🥺 Yun lang naman talaga ang goal mo sa life diba? To get back at them. To offer them a life you have always wanted for them. Thank you Lord, for keeping them healthy and safe. I could not ask for more yet youu showered me with more than I deserve. They aren't the perfect parents nor the best people in the world but the way they loved and supported me and my brother in all aspects of life, was enough for me to realize how blessed I am. 🥺 Lord, please keep them safe pa din, please? I'm almost there na.

Thank you for the past year, Lord. Another year is ahead of me. Adult na talaga. Help me make the right choices sa mga decisions ko in life, Lord. Bless me with your wisdom to always do good in everything I do. Give me the courage to face difficulties in life, still bounded by your love. Never give up on me, Lord. 🥲😓 Sometimes, I may go astray from you, question your will and go against you. Yet Lord, I am but your child, a mortal and a sinner, weak and lonely, easily tempted and angered. 😭❤ At times like this, show me the way back to you. 😭

Lead me, Lord. Lead me by the hands and face the rising sun, comfort through all the pain that life may bring. There's no other hope that I can lean upon. Lead me Lord, lead me all my life. 😭

Now I'm crying. :( Lord soothe my loneliness with your presence. I'm alone in the quarantine facility, celebrating my 24th birthday but you are here with me, and in that alone I am comforted. Happy birthday to you, Synd.

God bless you always and forever!

Signing off

AW Cindy Ela E Felix - 23

1412H 18 Sep 2021

[sam-does-art]

Thanks for tagging me, @keytomykingdom 

rules: answer 21 questions and tag 21 people

nickname: none

zodiac: aquarius

height: 175-180 ish cm

hogwarts house: ravenclaw

last thing i googled: free krita brushes

favourite musicians: Janelle Monae, Hozier

song stuck in my head: Cherry Wine by Hozier

following: 121

followers: 35

do you get asks: Not so far

amount of sleep: usually 6-7 Hours, unless I get a bit too immersed in a book and forget how late it is XD

what are you wearing: yellow T-Shirt, Grey Pullover, jeans

Dream job: Social worker is pretty much my Dream Job, but I´d like to be a writer/artist as well in an ideal world

Dream trip: I´d love to see Machu Picchu, I´d also love to go to Japan and/or Thailand

Instruments: I used to play the flute, but not very well, and tried to learn to play the guitar but the person who gave me lessons stopped doing that after a while and i never tried to find someone else

Languages: German is my native language, I speak English fluently and French very badly. I also took Latin for a few years and vaguely remember some of it and learned a bit of Spanish for fun.

 10 favorite songs as of now: Cherry Wine, Eden and To noise making by Hozier, Tightrope, Django Jane and Make me feel by Janelle Monae, Bohemian Rhapsody, Don´t stop me now and Crazy Little Thing called Love by Queen. I tend to listen to a few artists at a time, and right now it´s mostly those 3 .

If you were an animal: Hmm, a wolf or tiger, maybe. Although my fellow students at uni said I´d be a turtle when we had to assign animals to each other, and realistically it does fit me quite well.

 Favorite food: Sushi, but I don´t get to eat it often. I also love fried chicken and pizza.

 Random Fact: I used to do archery and horseback riding and I miss both a lot. One day I´d iike to own a horse and learn to do archery on horseback.

 My aesthetic: Messy, books and hot chocolate, scented candles, lots of blankets

I tag  @two-fac3d-d3mon @i-was-supposed-to-have-a-twin @am-bi-tchious @fakegamergirlcomics @what-even-is-thiss @wonderwoman-and-captainmarvel @captain-roslyn @gowak @adhd-alien @astarininazu @mossy-scaled-dragon @im-miss-ilovemyotps

I hope 12 is enough XD 

21 Questions Tag!

21 Questions Tag!

tagged by @taylorsgunnaslay and @camomille-tay (thank you guys! I’ve never been tagged in a question tag before omg) im taking this Very Seriously

rules: answer 21 questions and tag 21 people

nickname: Nandi

zodiac: virgo

height: 174cm

hogwarts house: gryffindor and ravenclaw

last thing i googled: cherimoya ( it’s a fruit apperantly )

favourite musicians: taylor swift and the 1975

song stuck in my head: ophelia by the lumineers

following: 205

followers: 77

do you get asks: no never ( at least, I think. my inbox doesn’t work and tumblr wont do anything about it )

amount of sleep: let’s not put a number on that. i have a hard time falling asleep (and waking)

what are you wearing: a grey top that’s too small so it looks cropped and high waisted baggy green pants.

dream job: i honestly have no clue, i don’t really want a job. i’m studying to be a sociologist though, so i guess that’s my dream job.

dream trip: go to nepal. everyone in my family has roots / memories there.

instruments: i used to play acoustic guitar. i’m terrible.

languages: dutch, english and enough french to get by.

10 favourite songs as of now: beautiful ghosts-taylor, graveyard-halsey, the archer-taylor, lover-taylor, breathe (2am)-anna nalick, mr. brightside-the killers, she lays down-the 1975, i really wish i hated you-blink182, sometime around midnight-the airborne toxic event, nashville-david mead/taylor

if you were an animal: I’d definitely be a cat 

favourite food: cheese 

random fact: i just saw frozen 2 and i loved it

my aesthetic: rainy nights, a tiny room stuffed with plants, lipstick, a glass of wine, books, the lamp is broken, candles. ( i have no idea what I’m doing )

i tag @acrazyobsession @jakeperalta @miserableandmagikal @cvrneliastreet @ericaheartstay @tayloralisonswiftlover @amadeupname @crabbybun @neladoesart @swiftsmiles @jasi-swiftie-13 @swiftxgrande13 @femmetay . @lightstheyneverblindme @david-the-starman-mccartney @tayloralisonswiftlover @rosalieswiftie @lynn-lucky13