#my dad is like idk you could probably get there in under 45 min from school! and im like ?? this does not seem like that lol

[ilostyou]

im so sjdjhgdkjfhgkfhgskjdhg mad btw i got free tickets to a concert monday night but i have SCHOOL

[jess-rewatches-prodigalson]

Bad Manners (S2, E5)

My time-stamped thoughts for this episode. As always I reference Malcolm’s mental health. A lot. So if that’s going to be a trigger for you, don’t keep reading.

SPOILERS AHEAD:

0:35 - Martin totally thought John Watkins abducted and killed Ainsley. Mark my words. 

0:44 - Holy. Shit. Ainsley is FIVE years old (or younger) here right? A five year old with that much determination?!?! She literally stayed silent in that clock for probably hours......and no one was concerned about this kid when Martin was arrested because...?

1:09 - Anyone else impressed with Malcolm’s aim here? Just me?

1:20 - Gil and Malcolm talking about sleep and murder is so freaking sweet. <3 Honestly, they’re acting like friends instead of co-workers and it warms my cold dead heart. 

1:29 - Does Gil become a grumpy old man when he doesn’t get 8 hours sleep? I really want to know now. 

1:39 - OMG. Gil pointing at Ainsley here is hilarious. He’s totally acting like some weird mix of a stern pissed off high-school teacher, and a step-dad trying to discipline an unruly teen. hahaha AND MALCOLM’S FACE. Look how done Malcolm is. He looks so so tired, sad, and exasperated. 

1:44 - Wow. Girl power. Ainsley has those camera guys bending to her will. I honestly would’ve thought they would just read the situation and turn the camera off themselves. 

1:47 - “It’s not a game.” Yikes. I have thoughts about this:

Malcolm is right - it’s not a game. 

Malcolm is a bit of a hypocrite for saying that to Ainsley. Although, to his credit even when Malcolm is excited/inappropriately happy about murder it’s always pretty clear that he thinks murder is wrong, and that he has sympathy for the victims and their families. 

Ainsley does not have that same sympathy for the victims. That much is clear later in this episode. 

Pretty sure the writers are trying to turn Ainsley into a serial killer this season. 

2:13 - “You know I like to share these things with my friends.” .....does this mean Malcolm thinks Dani and JT are his friends now? Last I checked (Ep 1x05) Malcolm didn’t have friends. This absolutely melts my heart. <3 I’m honestly so happy that Malcolm considers someone other than Gil to be his friend.

2:18 - “We lost Dani to vice.” .....What is vice? AND WHAT IS THE REAL LIFE REASON THAT DANI WASN’T IN THIS EPISODE?!? 

2:19 - Edrisa has a medical degree right? She has to know how dangerous consuming that much caffeine is right? Plus aren’t energy drinks super dangerous if you drink a lot of them (or maybe that’s just what adults in my neighbourhood told kids)?

2:30 - Edrisa SHINES in this episode. She’s so funny and awkward and I just love her. 

2:36 - hahaha Gil has adopted the whole team. Look at him throwing the “Dad warning stare” at Edrisa. 

3:31 - Why does Edrisa start bouncing around looking upset when Malcolm says, “rejection is a powerful motivator”?!?! Has she recently been broken up with or something? Is this a reference to how she has a crush on Malcolm (who doesn’t reciprocate)? I WANT MORE INFORMATION.

3:47 - TWIZZLERS!!! <3 Damn I love how this tiny detail about Malcolm’s character keeps coming up. 

3:55 - Ainsley is on a rampage this episode. She’s so determined ...actually she’s acting a lot like Jessica (think girl in the box bracelet). However, unlike Jessica, Ainsley’s motives aren’t about justice or the safety of her loved ones.  Ainsley is chasing personal gain (career) with a side of (a subconscious?) need to be exposed to murder and her father’s twisted world. 

4:05 - This whole interaction between Ainsley and Malcolm is really interesting. Ainsley is knowingly manipulating Malcolm to get the answers she wants. We’ve seen her do it in 2x4 and 1x19. She knows her big brother would do anything for her. It makes sense, they’re five years apart and after the trauma they experienced as children Malcolm felt responsible to protect Ainsley. He never wants to disappoint Ainsley. Not a burden he should’ve had to deal with but I digress. PLUS Malcolm looks weary of Ainsley here. He knows what she’s doing. He’s scared that she’s turning to the dark side. But he still gives her the answers because if he doesn’t - that means something has changed. He thinks that would make Ainsley suspicious and then she might remember what happened to Endicott. He’s scared of and for Ainsley. 

4:32 - OKAY. I’ll say it. The thing that annoys me the most about this episode is that it suggests that Ainsley was a debutant when in 1x6 AINSLEY TELLS MARTIN SHE WAS NEVER A DEBUTANT. She went to etiquette school - I guess that doesn’t strictly mean she also did debutant balls but it sort of suggests it in the context of this episode? Did she actually graduate from the etiquette school (there was bullying, maybe she was expelled/dropped out similar to Malcolm and Remington?)?

4:59 - “No stabbies” OMG. How is this show not classified as a comedy?!? Istg I laugh harder watching this ‘drama’ then I do watching most of the shows that call themselves ‘comedies’.

5:35 - It’s honestly kind of amazing that Ainsley and Malcolm are as ‘sane’ as they are. They were raised by a stubborn predatory psychopath and a stubborn rich meddling socialite. They had no chance of normalcy. Look at the amount of pleasure Martin is currently getting by throwing his son under the bus with regards to Jessica. 

 5:45 - “No actually, I cleaned it up.”.....does this have a dual meaning? Did Martin do something to make Malcolm dispose of the body? We already know that Martin has tried some sort of conditioning on Malcolm (remember ‘C’mon boy!’ from 1x14? The stabbing?). What if Martin said some sort of trigger word to control Malcolm and coerced Malcolm into getting rid of the body? What if this isn’t the first time?

6:05 - Ainsley is a sociopath. I’m calling it again. I called it when I first watched Q&A (1x7) because the way she treated Malcolm was more than just selfish/careless. It was cruel and she didn’t feel any remorse for literally broadcasting her brother’s private health details on television. That is messed up. I honestly won’t be shocked if the writers make Ainsley a full blown serial killers (although I’m not sure I want that because I don’t know how Malcolm would remain the main character if the story goes in that direction?). 

6:12 - Poor Jessica. I honestly feel really bad for her. Sure, she’s a headstrong alcohol dependant crazy rich woman. She also has a good heart. She’s been dealt a pretty shitty hand when it comes to relationships (minus Gil but she ruined that because she’s a MORON) and now she’s terrified that her own children have become monsters and she blames herself. She definitely hasn’t been a perfect mother but I don’t think she’s to blame for Ainsley and Malcolm’s obsession with murder. If these kids had a different bio dad, they would probably just have a low-key drug problem or some other common rich kid baggage. 

6:15 - “You know that’s not how cancer works right?” LOL. hahahaha

6:33 - Martin kind of has a point. There’s no rehab for murder. That’s why he’s been in jail for 20 years and he still wants to kill people. In my opinion, given what we’ve seen of Ainsley’s personality: as soon as she fully remembers that night - she’s gone. She’ll go full serial killer and Jessica and Malcolm will lose her forever. 

6:40 - Jessica’s little jazz hand finger twinkle as she spins on her heel and leaves Martin kills me. It’s so extra. It’s so funny. And it’s sooo Jessica. 

6:47 - Damn. Martin is pissed. I’m worried. That’s murder-level rage. If he escapes ISTG Martin is going to try and kill Gil. For so many reasons 1) because he hates Gil, 2) it’ll hurt Jessica, and 3) killing Gil will eliminate his ‘Dad’ competition. 

6:54 - Edrisa on caffeine is AMAZING.

7:43 - I love Edrisa but her blatant, unreciprocated crush on Malcolm is honestly getting a little creepy. 

7:52 - Gil spent all last season drinking out of a Yankee’s mug. Doesn’t that mean he’s a baseball fan? Why doesn’t he know this pitcher guy?

7:56 - hahahaa “Where is JT?” Because obviously JT is the team sports fan. 

8:22 - Does Gil get nightmares about cases? He always seems really uncomfortable around the dead bodies. 

8:45 - “And suddenly I’m wide awake” SERIOUSLY - is anyone else laughing every 60 seconds when they watch this show? Is my sense of humour just super dark and messed up?

8:54 - YES. The liquorice is BACK.

9:00 - I love Malcolm talking to JT about his obsession with candy. I love how Malcolm doesn’t even hesitate before giving JT an honest answer. Malcolm is acting like JT’s annoying little brother and I am here for it. One thing I did notice though - Malcolm specifically mentions candy+dopamine but doesn’t mention his depression/anxiety. Processed sugar can be a short-term (unhealthy) way to boost your mood. It’s why some people eat their feelings. I really want more backstory about Malcolm with the lollipops and licorice though. 

9:19 - “But you didn’t do anything wrong.” Awwww Malcolm is so soft here. I love how much he genuinely cares about JT. <3 I love how JT is comfortable enough with Malcolm to give him an honest answer. <3 THEIR RELATIONSHIP HAS GONE THROUGH SUCH A GLOW UP. <3 

9:32 - “Like toy dolls?” hahaha the way Malcolm perked up here. All I could think was “SQUIRREL!” hahaha. 

9:41 - Malcolm is doing better than he has been the past few episodes? I mean he’s still suffering and he’s still in a terrible mental state. BUT he also seems happier? IDK maybe he’s just entered the more manic nervous energy stage of his emotions as opposed to the depressed and scared stage. 

9:49 - “Deep childhood trauma”. So we’re looking for a debutant killer with childhood trauma who is chasing perfection? Debutant = rich lady culture. Like Ainsley. AND Ainsley went to the same etiquette school as the first two victims. The writer’s wanted us to assume the killer was Ainsley for the first 15 mins of this episode right? I’m not the only one seeing it?

10:04 - “My sister went there too.” ....why is there something super attractive about the way that line was delivered?

10:08 - I’m so done with this absolute tom foolery. Why does the team keep splitting up into two teams - where one team is JUST MALCOLM. The one who is unarmed and technically a civilian?!? This makes no logical sense to me (except for plot).

10:25 - Was Martin just about to say, “Just like the old days”?!? Is Martin referring to Endicott? OR is Martin referring to something that Malcolm’s repressed from his childhood?

10:30 - “I always root for the bad guys.” .....finally some truth from Martin.

10:40 - Soooooo I guess Mr. David doesn’t know? I promise you Mr. David has suspicions though. How could he not?!?!

11:24 - “It was brutal for Ains.” Look at how sad Malcolm is! Ugh. This hurts so much. He clearly loves his sister so so much and what she’s done is slowly killing him. I honestly think that part of the reason Malcolm helped Ainsley dispose of the body is that Malcolm doesn’t want to loose his sister. His sister is one of the only good things he’s always been able to count on. If word gets around that she’s a killer - Malcolm’s fragile world gets shattered a little more and I don’t know if Malcolm can recover mentally from that. 

11:36 - “Teasing made her capable of...stuff.” C’MON. There’s no way Mr. David doesn’t know. 

11:45 - Sooo is Martin saying that he recognized that Ainsley was a sociopath when she was a small child? Or did she just respond to his (or John Watkins’) grooming much ‘better’ than Malcolm?

11:56 - “Because she’s her mother’s” Okay. So I see the point. I can see that Ainsley is driven and stubborn like Jessica. BUT it feels like Martin is suggesting that Jessica is capable of murder? Which - I honestly don’t think she is. If anything - Malcolm is more like Jessica than Ainsley is.

11:59 - There was a look in Martin’s eyes when he was comparing Ainsley to Jessica that really freaked me out. I can’t figure out why. It makes me wonder if Martin still somehow views Jessica as ‘his possession’ (he refers to her as his wife all the time but I always assumed that was just to get a rise out of people?). Martin’s dream from 2x4 certainly suggests that he still wants Jessica romantically. I honestly think he’s going to try to escape and rekindle the romance with Jess; and it’s going to go very poorly when Jessica rejects him. 

12:06 - Preach JT. Preach. This is creepy af. 

13:00 - Ugh. Of course this creep has a history of indecent exposure. Now I understand why Gil and JT were hostile with the dude right from the start. 

13:12 - Man. People will use the Bible to justify anything. No wonder people hate Christians ( I say this as a practicing Christian).

13:18 - JT is such a good dude. I’m so glad he’s a dad now. <3 He’s going to be such a good one. <3

13:26 - “One phone call and this place will be shut down.” OH SHIT. GIL THAT IS VICIOUS AND I RESPECT THE SHIT OUT OF IT.

13:35 - I soooo thought that dude was going to sprint out of that room. 

14:30 - THIS. YES. This is why I have a problem with Ainsley’s enthusiasm for murder vs. Malcolm’s. Ainsley’s enthusiasm is centred on her nee to ‘get the story’. She’s obsessed with forwarding her career and as a result she’s treating crime like a competitive sport. Malcolm’s obsession (while it can border on creepy and reckless) is always centred on his need to find the killer and stop the murders. Malcolm is seeking justice and his heart is in the right place. I can’t say the same for Ainsley.

14:31 - “We’re brother and sister, everything is a competitive sport”.....whoever wrote this doesn’t have a sibling they experienced trauma with as a kid (and as a result was raised by a single parent). Seriously, my dad was abusive he lived with us until I was 10 and my brother was 7. Then my parents got divorced and my mom was a single parent (he didn’t pay child support or see his kids after the divorce). Are my brother and I competitive? Sure sometimes. But the way we grew up forced us to become partners. Annoyed with Mom? Let’s rant about it together. Is he struggling in math? I’ll tutor him in exchange for a Reese cup. Am I struggling at daycare because I have massive social anxiety? He’ll include me in whatever he’s doing so I’m not sitting alone in a corner. My point: siblings who experience trauma together don’t have the typical sibling relationships that are widely televised in North America. There’s a lot less fighting and competition and a lot more teaming up and commiserating. 

14:39 - “It. It’s terrible.” - Notice how Ainsley didn’t actually say how it made her feel? She gave the standard “TV response” to a murder “a terrible/horrific/tragedy has occurred”. She doesn’t feel bad that these women are dead. She’s too consumed with getting a story to even stop and let herself feel anything. I’ve been saying it since last season - the way Ainsley shows no regard for other people and their feelings when she’s obsessed with her job is concerning. 

14:50 - “Remind me of the people who cut us off after Dad’s arrest.” ...Are you kidding me?!? The whole fandom has been speculating about this since early season one and they’re not going to elaborate on that line?!? I’m going to need some more information about this and it better be in the upcoming episode where Jessica’s younger sister appears. 

15:40 - She thinks of her students as family? Sooo what does she think of Ainsley? Wasn’t Ainsley bullied at this school? Did she do anything about it? 

16:00 - this is like a ‘weekend/evening school’ right? Kids aren’t living in this house like a boarding school/summer camp?

16:01 - “Mr. Whitly” UGH. This bitch preaches etiquette and she doesn’t even have the common courtesy to call Malcolm by the name with which he introduced himself? Nah. I don’t like her. 

16:13 - Ugh. Ainsley, seriously? Why don’t you help your brother solve the case. AND PREVENT MORE MURDERS. Why are you indirectly but purposely obstructing justice?

16:37 - “Of course.” Huh. Do you think Martin might try and manipulate Ainsley into killing Malcolm? Ainsley definitely capable of it. She doesn’t actually seem to care about Malcolm nearly as much as he cares about her. 

17:17 - WTF?!? That’s creepy af. How did no one in this show think this assistant was a suspect? She has a super creepy doll that she ‘forgot’ on the floor the middle of a hallway. AND THE DOLL WAS STANDING UP. Not sitting, not dropped carelessly, STANDING UP.

17:30 - Look at Malcolm’s face. He’s definitely going to be having nightmares about that doll. 

18:25 - OMG. This was amazing. JT just totally bulldozed his way into catching that dude. Very badass. Also kind of funny (maybe that’s just my messed up sense of humour again?).

18:44 - Ugh. This dude has a thing for dolls. I don’t want to kink shame but - no. no. There’s something really gross about that.  

18:48 - I’ve seen some people say that this doll looks like Ainsley and how that’s supposed to be some sort of foreshadowing/symbolism. I kind of see it? I mean the hair colour is similar and if you pause the screen at 18:48 the angle kind of looks like Ainsley? It would be an interesting metaphor though - Ainsley played with dolls as a little girl. John Watkins gave her angel statues. She is Watkins’ and Martin’s doll’ in the sense that she was the object that murders manipulated/groomed. 

18:53 - Then again, pause the screen here and there’s something about the facial structure that looks like Dani to me. 

19:00 - Jessica lets Ainsley work in the murder office?!? No. No she doesn’t. This is garbage. Jessica would’ve forbade it. Jessica would’ve bordered up this room immediately after Watkins.

19:57 - Poor Jessica. She’s clearly terrified that she’s losing Ainsley and terrified of Ainsley. BUT Jess, sweetie, running to Europe won’t fix this. 

20:16 - “She wanted the dolls to look like her students.” AND PEOPLE SEND THEIR CHILDREN TO HER?!? WTF?!? NO. NO. NO. NOT OKAY. 

20:31 - HAHA look at Gil’s face when Trevor tells him he can make the ‘perfect woman’. Gil’s like WTF - can I arrest you for thinking you can fabricate a ‘perfect woman’?!!?

21:06 - Malcolm is having so much fun playing with Trevor’s doll head. Look at how excited he is. It’s kind of adorable but his manic energy is showing which is concerning. 

21:10 - Why is Trevor giving his doll fancy 1940s(ish) names? 

21:31 - Props to LDP. I honestly believed Gil was annoyed with Malcolm for barging in on the interrogation the first time I watched this. 

21:42 - “They got a word for everything.” hahaha OMG. This is so reminiscent of a teenager explaining some new tech to their tech-illiterate parents. 

22:00 - I can’t tell if Gil feels sorry for this creep or if he just thinks the dude is really gross. Probably a mixture. 

23:00 - Oh we’re bringing up the chloroform again. At least Malcolm knows not listen to Martin about this nonsense. 

23:25 - “It doesn’t feel fun.” - THIS. This is why I honestly don’t think Malcolm will ever become a serial killer. His guilt complex is just too big.

23:56 - Are. You. Kidding. Me? This is next level. Ainsley is so out of line here. AND SHE SHOWS NO REMORSE. SHE DOESN’T THINK SHE’S DONE ANYTHING WRONG. THIS GIRL HAS GONE DARK SIDE (she was already halfway there).

24:17 - I’m getting papa!Gil vibes when Gil is talking to Ainsley and I want more scenes of them interacting. Seriously, did Gil have a relationship with Ainsley when she was a kid? I MUST KNOW.

24:45 - Ainsley has no conscience. I honestly don’t think Ainsley has a conscience. 

25:00 - “Who is that!?” Malcolm is totally acting like he’s Ainsley’s father-figure right now. I’m here for it. 

25:22 - SORE LOSERS?!? I’m sorry. What? If you weren’t concerned about Ainsley you damn well should be now. That is seriously messed up. People are dead. This is not a game. Do you know who else thought murder was a game? Martin Whitly.

25:31 - Okay. Ainsley has a point. Malcolm lecturing anyone about being reckless is pretty hypocritical. But at least Malcolm cares about her. 

25:54 - Heart. Shattered. Look at how terrified Jessica is. Look at how gentle and reassuring Gil is. UGh. WHY DID SHE BREAK UP WITH HIM??! I mean, I know why I just think she’s a moron for doing it. 

26:00 - Poor Gil. He’s so confused and so concerned. The whole Whitly family is acting crazier then usual and he doesn’t know why. 

26:11 - “Both you and Malcolm are at an 11 and I’ve never seen Ainsley like that.” FIND YOURSELF A MAN WHO CARES LIKE GIL AND NEVER LET HIM GO. <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 Seriously. The love and concern he shows for this family warms my cold dead heart. 

26:16 - “Her father?!” Oh shit. Now Gil knows there’s something BIG happening. Jessica would never run to Martin unless she absolutely had to. 

26:19 - annnnd Gil’s also being a prideful man who’s feeling are hurt. “You went to him?” He’s right to be though - the woman he loves went to a serial killer for advice before going to the guy who practically co-parented with her. 

26:33 - “I’m here. Whatever you need. I’m here.” <3 <3 Gil is the definition of a good man. <3 I’m in love with it. 

26:48 - “You were right on time for me.” ....*snort* subtle Gil (and in front of JT!!)

27:08 - Edrisa is hysterical on caffeine. hahaha. This whole scene is perfect. 

27:20 - You know someone is acting manic when Malcolm Bright is concerned about their eccentric behaviour. 

27:34 - Annnnnd Tom Payne was a split second from breaking character here. I don’t blame him. hahaha

28:05 - EDRISA flipping and dropping that pencil. HAHAHAHAHAHA

29:10 - “Absolutely not.” hahaha this is funny but also really sweet. Malcolm knows that Edrisa hopped up on caffeine isn’t safe to have near an active killer. Who knows what’ll happen. I wish he’d care that much about his own well being. Looks like calling for backup last episode was a one time thing. 

30:37 - I’ll give the writers one thing - Miss Windsor makes a convincing murder suspect.

31:22 - GIL. STANDING. UP. FOR. JT. IS. EVERYTHING. Where is O’Malley’s back up? Oh yeah, they’re not brave enough to defend him.

32:00 - Huh. Bright texted for backup. This is growth. I’m proud of him. 

32:15 - YES. This JT arc was handled right. Sure JT could’ve complained. It would’ve been episodes upon episodes of bureaucratic nightmares and injustice. This show isn’t about racism. They showed enough to portray that the system is broken and they had JT act like a responsible adult. It’s not fair that JT had to go through this or that he’ll likely experience something similar to it again. But the fact that JT is acting like a bigger person is perfect. JT will protect his family. Always. That includes Malcolm. So JT avoids putting through a formal complaint because he knows that will take time away from doing his job, from protecting others, from hanging out with his wife and kid. JT’s taking the higher road, it might not be gratifying or fair but I respect the hell out of him for taking it. 

32:28 - Gil is so so proud of JT. Look at him. <3 <3 

33:40 - Look, Miss Windsor is a bit of a stuck up bitch but she has a good heart. Look at the way she immediately tells Malcolm where Ainsley is when she realizes what’s happening. 

34:14 - This confused me during the first watch - Ainsley obviously didn’t drink any tea - so why is she drugged? (obviously I know now). 

34:17 - Big brother Malcolm frantically looking for Ainsley is so so sweet. <3 

35:42 - The music, the dolls, and Miss Windsor’s speech here. There’s something about this part of the episode that is strangely reminiscent of 5x16 of Criminal Minds.

36:20 - ......does Miss Windsor have some sort of mental illness? She’s talking to herself and ranting erratically. Is this just emotional stress or something deeper?

37:00 - This is why Malcolm’s not a serial killer. Even now- looking at a killer - he’s trying to sympathize with her. He’s trying to understand why. He’s trying to calm her down, diffuse the threat, and get her mental help. 

39:00 - Oh yeah. Ainsley was definitely going to kill without remorse. Again. I’ve seen some theories that Ainsley only ever tries to kill to protect Malcolm. I disagree. I think Ainsley’s trying to protect herself. Ainsley is pissed off that this girl tried to drug her and kill her because she thinks Ainsley is wicked. Ainsley was pissed at Endicott for whatever he did to Ainsley before Malcolm got there. I think Ainsley felt threatened and scared so she reacted. I don’t think this has anything to do with protecting Malcolm.

39:41 - Malcolm isn’t a killer. Look. He smells gas but he takes the time to carry an unconscious murderer (who literally just tried to kill his sister) out of the building. 

40:00 - The drama. Holy hell. What a weird ending to this case.

40:48 - Who gave Ainsley a police jacket and let her keep it?

41:14 - She almost died and she’s still obsessing over ‘winning’. This is seriously unstable behaviour. Way more concerning than anything Malcolm’s done since 2x1. 

41:45 - “My father was a serial killer also.” Anyone else super irritated by that phrasing?!?  Just me?!? Something about the ‘also’ feels super wrong to me.

41:53 - Oh sweetie. I’d argue that you are more messed up than Malcolm. 

42:06 - Jessica went to see Martin twice in one episode. THIS IS BAD.

42:15 - “Maybe even more so than Malcolm if that’s possible.” Jessica knows her kids. I’m on her side here. 

42:20 - Martin is way too happy about Ainsley showing signs of serial killing. 

42:30 - Jessica? You married an act. That man never existed. He’s always been a serial killer. You just didn’t know it. He’s manipulative and you were a victim to it. 

42:50 - “A partner.” OH THIS IS NOT GOING TO END WELL. ESPECIALLY FOR THE GIL/JESSICA ARC.

Okay....so definitely the weakest episode of the season so far. AND the fact that we got no mention of Tally and/or the baby this episode is a crime. 

BUT I’M SO SO SO EXCITED FOR THE NEXT EPISODE. It’s going to be a televised fanfic and I can’t wait. 

[beecherdrysdale]

Heyyyy my bbs, time to write about GREECE 🇬🇷 w our fav boys.

- first Brigid it is so cool that you have a greek friend can she please take me w her lol.

Airports in the morning just have that vibe, lmao I just excited. I usually have pretty early flights and I get there early, like my mom is always anxious for missing flights so we’d be at the airport at like 2:30 am for a 5:30 flight. And I always ask why? I could still sleep.

Ya let’s just say our flight is at 5:30 so we are there at like 3:45 lol idk times. Everybody is groggy or passed out in the car before getting to the airport so they’re just barely awake, other than Ryan, quinton, Dylan me and Kirby? Once we pass security which I will most definitely get beeped on, and find our gate, Ryan and quinton set off to get snacks for the flight. We might send Braden w them to keep Ryan in check lol. Also brigid lucky w the tsa pre check.

Jamie and Brigid just collapse on the chairs and just hold each other, and look a d o r a b l e. I’ll take some photos hehe. You two are just cocooned together.

Kirbs and kesh also cuddle up with each other, Kirby just chilling and playing w kesh’s hair. And kesh just sleeping. I can just see it. Some of the other boys just pull their hoods down and pass out on the chairs as well.

Meanwhile: I need a drink so I go to Starbucks w Quinner and dyl. I’ll get you coffee:) and kesh a stuffed pretzel cuz Ily . Maybe we can get Tims oooo.

I come back and see you passed out w Jamie 🥺 and I just give you your coffee and kesh her pretzel and go find the rest of the boys, because I need some snackssss for the flight. dyl is a bit jealous so he’ll just join us hehe. After that video of quinner I want his beanie so I steal it.

Let’s fast forward to boarding and everyone has gathered. Ryan and quinton have a mountain of snacks, and Brigid and Jamie are still passed out lol.

When they call our seat section all of us are just chaotic and getting our passports. The tickets are random lol so you’ll see who you sit with. Going through the tunnel and into the plane is so fun!!.

Ok on plane pt1.

Seating: Brigid gets lucky and is in a row with both Dylan and Jamie so she’s sandwich’d between them, but that depends on what part of the row you like, aisle, middle or window. Orrr maybe for the plane ride brigid is sitting w dyl this time and w Dylan c or something and Jamie’s trying to get Dylan c to switch seats w him so that he can sit w Brigid as well. Jealous boy....

Kesh and Kirby are automatically sitting together even if they have different assigned seats lol. Idk kesh can you sleep on planes, i never can. Wbu Brigid? So if you can you are still sleeping on Kirby and he’s making sure that you have good leg room and are comfortable.

Hehe maybe to spare Quinners feeling we will sit together in the same row. Maybe Ryan can sit w us and behind brigids row cuz the chirps never stop y’all. Since i never sleep on planes maybe Quinner falls asleep on me and I can play w his hair 🥺

The rest of boys are just asleep before take off

Still this flight is chaotic lol.

Pt 1. Is before take off. So pt 2 is the flight and getting to Greece 😍

Hope you enjoy:))

hehe sorry for the late response, i had a big history assignment i had to finish last night. anyways, long post ahead

ok i want to go to greece so bad bc it’s sooooo pretty, so going with the canada boys is like a dream. whenever my friend goes i try to convince her to let me come with but she won’t lol

yesss the airports in the early morning have the best vibes, bc there’s barely anyone there and you can do basically whatever you want. haha my dad’s the same, we have to be to the airport like 3 hours before our flight and our flights are usually at like 5:30 am. and i’m just like why? there’s barely anyone there, plus we have pre-check so we can get through really fast

anywayssss yes we’d get to the airport at like 3:30 so pretty much everyone is super tired and like about to fall asleep. and then we have to go through security and a bunch of us would get beeped lol. and i won’t have precheck bc my dad wouldn’t be there lol so i have to go through normal security with all of you guys, which i haven’t done in ages so i don’t even remember what to do lmao. don’t you have to like take your shoes off?

so once we all finally get through, we have to go find our gate so we can put all our stuff down. side note: do you guys check you bags? i never do bc both times my siblings have checked bags stuff got broken so now i just bring a carry-on suitcase and a duffel that i can put under the seat. anywayssss once all our stuff is set down ryan and quinton have to go get snacks and then braden decides to go with. honestly i feel like quinton would be the one keeping them in check lol while the other two are just going crazy with the food

meanwhile, me and jamie are just sleeping over by our gate. like usually i’m the one who’s super hyper for the morning flights, but since my swim practice keep getting pushed back later i probably wouldn’t go to bed til like 1 am the night before so i would be really tired lol. plus jamie would be wearing one of his hoodies and i would also be wearing one of his that i stole and he would be so warm that i would just fall asleep with him and we’re just cocooned together 🥺 also yes please take pictures i need a new phone background

and then kesh and kirby are just chilling together, kesh is passed out on kirby and kirby’s just playing with her hair while she sleeps bc he’s responsible so he actually went to bed early the night before lol. and some of the other guys just pull their hoods over their eyes so they can sleep 

then there’s you and quinner and dyl who are still tired but not enough to sleep, so you guys go to get coffee, either tims or starbucks depending on if we’re in canada or the states. and then you can get kesh her stuffed pretzel and then coffee for me, haha unpopular opinion i usually drink my coffee black. so then you can leave the pretzel and coffee for kesh and i and then you quinner and dyl go leave to find the other guys bc you want food lmao. good thing ryan isn’t there or else the two of you would be waking me and jamie up just to chirp us lol. anywayssss then while you guys are going to catch up with the other you steal quinner’s beanie and he spends a good 10 min trying to get it back before he just gives in and lets you keep it 😂

hehe then when it’s finally time to board it’s just chaos like trying to wake everyone up and get all your stuff and making sure everyone has passports. and then we’re all trying to carry all the snacks onto the plane bc there are so many, and everyone else is just staring at us lmao

so then once we get on the plane it’s even more chaos all trying to find our seats and everyone’s switching seats so they can sit with who they want to lol. and then i’m in a row with dyl but jamie’s not in our row, so he’s begging cozens to switch seats with him and ends up paying him like $50 just to switch lmao. so then i’m between dyl and jamie bc i really don’t care which seat i have and i’d probably be watching a movie (if we have them, idk my dad has a tonnnn of points saved up from traveling for work so we usually can get first class tickets free) bc i can never sleep on planes. and then kesh and kirby are automatically together, everyone would switch seats if they needed to have the two of them together bc they’re literally #couplegoals. and kirby’s just trying to make sure kesh is comfy and that she can sleep if she wants to. and then we have lexi in a row with quinner and ryan, and ofc they have to sit behind me for the sole purpose of lexi and ryan chirping me the entire fucking flight. but then quinner’s still tired even tho he drank like 3 coffees, so he falls asleep on lexi and lexi plays with his hair 🥺 and then half the other boys are already asleep again, like i don’t understand how they sleep sm? i could never

so anywayssss that’s all for part one, i love it and i’m so excited for part two. and i’m sorry i really didn’t add much but i’m braindead from the math test i just took

[low-budget-mulan]

1-155

This is going to be long. So it’s going under.

1: Full name

Sara [REDACTED]2: Age

22 1/23: 3 Fears

Caterpillars, rolly pollies, idk?4: 3 things I love

my niece, my job, my friends5: 4 turns on

nice, caring, strong, able to cook6: 4 turns off

any of the guys I have been in relationships with lol7: My best friend

I have many. Brandon, kelsey, renee8: Sexual orientation

straight 9: My best first date

I mean. All my first dates were ok? Like the last 2 guys I dated I had a lot of fun. We ate and laughed and talked about memes. 10: How tall am I

5 ft 6 in11: What do I miss

My niece12: What time were I born

*was         idk like 2 pm?

13: Favourite color

purple14: Do I have a crush

nah fam. Aint nobody got time for dat 15: Favourite quote

”be not afraid” 16: Favourite place

Mammoth/june mountain, disneyland, yosemite17: Favourite food

My grandma’s cooking. Always. 18: Do I use sarcasm

Nooooo. Why would I do that (i was being sarcastic. And yes) 19: What am I listening to right now

Slime rancher home screen music 20: First thing I notice in new person

face21: Shoe size

1222: Eye color

brown23: Hair color

^24: Favourite style of clothing

hobo with a job 25: Ever done a prank call?

yes27: Meaning behind my URL

brandon insulted me. I agreed 

28: Favourite movie

Totoro, book of life, home, Christopher Robin29: Favourite song

idk??30: Favourite band

WAL31: How I feel right now

Sleepy after getting off a 38 hour shift32: Someone I love

My niece33: My current relationship status

Married to my job I guess. 34: My relationship with my parents

There is one at least35: Favourite holiday

CHRISTMAS36: Tattoos and piercing i have

Be not afraid on my arm. No piercings 37: Tattoos and piercing i want

Verso L’Alto, and some others38: The reason I joined Tumblr

neighbor made me one 

39: Do I and my last ex hate each other?

I don’t hate him. I am hurt. But he decided to not want to be friends at all. I would have still loved to be friends with him, even though we didn’t work out. 40: Do I ever get “good morning” or “good night ” texts?

no41: Have I ever kissed the last person you texted?

My cousin? no 

42: When did I last hold hands?

idk? many moons ago 43: How long does it take me to get ready in the morning?

depends if I shower. If I shower then 30 mins. If not then 10 

44: Have You shaved your legs in the past three days?

No I don’t have to shave my legs. 45: Where am I right now?

in bed46: If I were drunk & can’t stand, who’s taking care of me?

My friend renee. But I have never been drunk before because I am not a lightweight and I also know how to say no. Why would I intentionally want to make myself sick. 47: Do I like my music loud or at a reasonable level?

depends where I am and how I am feeling 

48: Do I live with my Mom and Dad?

yes, because I make minimum wage as a first responder and can’t afford to live on my own. 49: Am I excited for anything?

Not being on night shift anymore XD currently dying from it and need a break.

50: Do I have someone of the opposite sex I can tell everything to?

Brandito51: How often do I wear a fake smile?

Whenever a patient or random person starts creeping on me. 52: When was the last time I hugged someone?

I hugged My niece so many times today 53: What if the last person I kissed was kissing someone else right in front of me?

I would tell him to go away. But like that’s just because I am mad at him. He can kiss whoever he wants. I don’t care. I don’t own him. He is his own person. 54: Is there anyone I trust even though I should not?

My friend Sam 55: What is something I disliked about today?

not sleeping all day 56: If I could meet anyone on this earth, who would it be?

idk?57: What do I think about most?

My niece and how much I miss her. and wanting to move out 58: What’s my strangest talent?

I don’t have any 59: Do I have any strange phobias?

caterpillars and rolly pollies 60: Do I prefer to be behind the camera or in front of it?

behind 61: What was the last lie I told?

idk? Probably something I said to a patient? 62: Do I perfer talking on the phone or video chatting online?

online63: Do I believe in ghosts? How about aliens?

no64: Do I believe in magic?

no65: Do I believe in luck?

no66: What’s the weather like right now?

sunny 7767: What was the last book I’ve read?

Emerald Dodge’s battlecry Series. 68: Do I like the smell of gasoline?

makes my physically sick69: Do I have any nicknames?

Low Budget Mulan, Sa’a, Scara, Hoe70: What was the worst injury I’ve ever had?

uhhhhhh My back? and also my wrists and neck. But this is all from work and having to lift heavy patients. 71: Do I spend money or save it?

both. But I need to start saving more 

72: Can I touch my nose with a tounge?

yea73: Is there anything pink in 10 feets from me?

bubble gum tape 

74: Favourite animal?

idk75: What was I doing last night at 12 AM?

working.76: What do I think is Satan’s last name is?

doesnt have one 77: What’s a song that always makes me happy when I hear it?

idk78: How can you win my heart?

memes, food, money79: What would I want to be written on my tombstone?

”guess I’ll Die”80: What is my favorite word?

idk81: My top 5 blogs on tumblr

i don’t have any 82: If the whole world were listening to me right now, what would I say?

Ambulances are not a taxi service and your stubbed toes are not emergencies. Pay first responders more. 83: Do I have any relatives in jail?

not that I know of. 84: I accidentally eat some radioactive vegetables. They were good, and what’s even cooler is that they endow me with the super-power of my choice! What is that power?

super sarcasm probably? idk? flight? invisibility? super strength?85: What would be a question I’d be afraid to tell the truth on?

this one 86: What is my current desktop picture?

default picture87: Had sex?

no, just waffles88: Bought condoms?

no89: Gotten pregnant?

no90: Failed a class?

many91: Kissed a boy?

yes92: Kissed a girl?

no93: Have I ever kissed somebody in the rain?

cant remember94: Had job?

many95: Left the house without my wallet?

yep96: Bullied someone on the internet?

just my sister97: Had sex in public?

no, just waffles98: Played on a sports team?

yes99: Smoked weed?

no100: Did drugs?

crack is wack101: Smoked cigarettes?

ew no102: Drank alcohol?

heck yea103: Am I a vegetarian/vegan?

no I dont hate myself104: Been overweight?

yes105: Been underweight?

no106: Been to a wedding?

yes107: Been on the computer for 5 hours straight?

yes108: Watched TV for 5 hours straight?

yes109: Been outside my home country?

yes110: Gotten my heart broken?

ye111: Been to a professional sports game?

I’ve worked them 112: Broken a bone?

yes113: Cut myself?

yes114: Been to prom?

no115: Been in airplane?

yes116: Fly by helicopter?

no117: What concerts have I been to?

Many118: Had a crush on someone of the same sex?

no119: Learned another language?

pig latin120: Wore make up?

ye121: Lost my virginity before I was 18?

no122: Had oral sex?

ew no 123: Dyed my hair?

yes124: Voted in a presidential election?

yes125: Rode in an ambulance?

Bruh. I work in one. I drive that bitch126: Had a surgery?

yes127: Met someone famous?

Many famous sports people and some others 128: Stalked someone on a social network?

every day 129: Peed outside?

yes130: Been fishing?

yes131: Helped with charity?

yes132: Been rejected by a crush?

no because I never make the first move. And I never tell someone I like them unless they have said they liked me first 133: Broken a mirror?

lol ye134: What do I want for birthday?

money135: How many kids do I want and what will be their names?

many. Idk?136: Was I named after anyone?

no137: Do I like my handwriting?

sometimes138: What was my favourite toy as a child?

furby and my doll139: Favourite Tv Show?

idk140: Where do I want to live when older?

yosemite, june mountain, mammoth, japan 141: Play any musical instrument?

no142: One of my scars, how did I get it?

on my hand, My mom poured hot caramel on me. 143: Favourite pizza toping?

pepperoni144: Am I afraid of the dark?

no145: Am I afraid of heights?

no146: Have I ever got caught sneaking out or doing anything bad?

no 147: Have I ever tried my hardest and then gotten disappointed in the end?

My whole life148: What I’m really bad at

everything149: What my greatest achievments are

nothing150: The meanest thing somebody has ever said to me

some stuff my mom has said 151: What I’d do if I won in a lottery

move out and buy a house and save the rest 152: What do I like about myself

nothing 153: My closest Tumblr friend

brandito and kelsey 154: Something I fantasise about

having a family 155: Any question you’d like?

rood 

[bipolarwitchcraft]

Awnser all the questions of the post you recently reblogged.

Yeet 1. coffee mugs, teacups, wine glasses, water bottles, or soda cans?-water bottles. I like metal ones. 2. chocolate bars or lollipops?-lollipops3. bubblegum or cotton candy?-cotton candy4. how did your elementary school teachers describe you?-a pleasure to have in class and a creative writer. I wrote a lot of stories and was told by a few teachers I could be a published author when I got older. I hope they’re right. 5. do you prefer to drink soda from soda cans, soda bottles, plastic cups or glass cups?-cans the easiest 6. pastel, boho, tomboy, preppy, goth, grunge, formal or sportswear?-boho goth county would accurately describe me7. earbuds or headphones?-earbuds but not apple earbuds Bc they hurt8. movies or tv shows?-tv shows under 30 mins bc my attention span is 2 seconds (excluding the Orville and 911 bc those are amazing shows)9. favorite smell in the summer?-well water and main and tail shampoo10. game you were best at in p.e.?-volleyball. If I didn’t have to play 2 sports to be in athletics I would have played it in high school. 11. what you have for breakfast on an average day?-I don’t eat breakfast usually at school but when I work at camp I’ll usually have 2 eggo waffles and peanut butter maybe with a plum or something 12. name of your favorite playlist?-drive songs 13. lanyard or key ring?-key ring. I can’t stand having my keys on a lanyard 14. favorite non-chocolate candy?-Swedish fish 15. favorite book you read as a school assignment?-the secret life of bees and of mice and men. They are the only two I actually read all the way through and didn’t sparknotes lmaoo16. most comfortable position to sit in?-completely slouched in a chair with on leg crossed 17. most frequently worn pair of shoes?-my serape ariat cruisers or my berks 18. ideal weather?-70s to mid 80s with a nice breeze 19. sleeping position?-I’m a stomach sleeper lol but I usually try to fall asleep on my left side 20. preferred place to write (i.e., in a note book, on your laptop, sketchpad, post-it notes, etc.)?-note book. My favorite are the 5-star note books. College rule. One subject. 21. obsession from childhood?-dinosaurs and rocks. Still relevant today as a geology major22. role model?-don’t have role models. They always disappoint. Just be a decent person and do what you enjoy. 23. strange habits?-I rub the corners of blankets and pillows and such on and under my thumb nail. But only my right. I also poke my tongue out of my mouth a little when I’m riding. 24. favorite crystal?-I’m a sucker for amethyst. But quartz is also a favorite. I have natural quartz clusters all over my backyard at home. 25. first song you remember hearing?-besides like baby songs it was probably something my dad was listening to so I’m going to say Loser by Beck or Sweet Home Alabama bc those have been staples of my life. 26. favorite activity to do in warm weather?-ride and then immediately jump in the lake 27. favorite activity to do in cold weather?-read 28. five songs to describe you?-I don’t know enough about myself to know what describes me but my favorite songs rn are ‘99’ by Barnes Courtney, Colours by Grouplove, Pumped Up Kicks by foster the people, Talk Too Much by Coin, and Broken by lovelytheband 29. best way to bond with you?-talk to me 30. places that you find sacred?-nature, whataburger at 3am, and my room 31. what outfit do you wear to kick ass and take names?-I always feel badass when I wear my show chaps 32. top five favorite vines?-omg so many. Road work ahead, Adam, any from that kid that wear his hoodie and has his ears sticking out (snoooooooooop), well when life gives you lemons, you either kill your self or get killed what you gonna do 33. most used phrase in your phone?-lmaooo34. advertisements you have stuck in your head?-tide pods with gronk 35. average time you fall asleep?-midnight ish 36. what is the first meme you remember ever seeing?-ummmm it was probably some iFunny shit 37. suitcase or duffel bag?-duffle 38. lemonade or tea?-sweet tea 39. lemon cake or lemon meringue pie?-lemon meringue pie from Bluebonnet Cafe 40. weirdest thing to ever happen at your school?-some much. Some let a rooster loose in the main hall and no one could catch it, some left stink bait in the locker and the whole school smelled, some just showed up and gave my ag teacher a calf, we had a interim principal who we called Bernie Sanders which he hated and sent out a announcement video telling us to stop and we only got worse 41. last person you texted?-my mom42. jacket pockets or pants pockets?-jacket pockets 43. hoodie, leather jacket, cardigan, jean jacket or bomber jacket?-oof I’m a sucker for a cardigan 44. favorite scent for soap?-lavender 45. which genre: sci-fi, fantasy or superhero?-fantasy 46. most comfortable outfit to sleep in?-over sized t shirt47. favorite type of cheese?-mozzarella 48. if you were a fruit, what kind would you be?-I feel like I would be a strawberry bc im a strawberry blond/a redhead 49. what saying or quote do you live by?-sometime it just be like that 50. what made you laugh the hardest you ever have?-this video has my gasping every. Single. Time. If you’re sad PLS WATCH: https://youtu.be/23B017ZVIx451. current stresses?-finals and getting my wisdom teeth removed 52. favorite font?-I only use times new roman lol I don’t type a lot 53. what is the current state of your hands?-dry but my nails are getting long which I’m glad about54. what did you learn from your first job?-I worked retail so I learned how to handle people at their worst lol 55. favorite fairy tale?-I like the Disney Rapunzel, but I also like the original telling if the little mermaid 56. favorite tradition?-watching the 24hours of a Christmas Story during Christmas 57. the three biggest struggles you’ve overcome?-self harm -body image -fighting 58. four talents you’re proud of having?-creativity through writing, riding, baking, common sense59. if you were a video game character, what would your catchphrase be?-bro60. if you were a character in an anime, what kind of anime would you want it to be?-yoooo61. favorite line you heard from a book/movie/tv show/etc.?-I’ve read too many books to have a favorite line from just one lol, but I heard “I’m a grown up ass man I can do what I want” on AP bio which was pretty funny 62. seven characters you relate to?-Nina Zenik from Six of Crows. That’s it. She’s the only one. 63. five songs that would play in your club?-I cannot stand clubs or bars so none lol64. favorite website from your childhood?-fucking moshimonster.com and girlsgogames.com 65. any permanent scars?-yep. I got burned as a baby and still have the scars on my fingers 19 years later. I have a lot more as well. 66. favorite flower(s)?-I’m more of a succulent person so cactus flowers 67. good luck charms?-I don’t really have any 68. worst flavor of any food or drink you’ve ever tried?-I had ranch flavored soda once so that takes it. But I don’t like cheap beer either. 69. a fun fact that you don’t know how you learned? -a daddy long leg spider is the most poisonous spider but their fangs are too weak to pierce human skin 70. left or right handed?-right 71. least favorite pattern?-houndstooth 72. worst subject?-calculus 73. favorite weird flavor combo?-hot Cheetos and sour cream74. at what pain level out of ten (1 through 10) do you have to be at before you take an advil or ibuprofen?-575. when did you lose your first tooth?- 5 y/o76. what’s your favorite potato food (i.e. tater tots, baked potatoes, fries, chips, etc.)?-mashed 100%77. best plant to grow on a windowsill?-jade succulents 78. coffee from a gas station or sushi from a grocery store?-I like sushi from HEB 79. which looks better, your school id photo or your driver’s license photo?-school id80. earth tones or jewel tones?-earth times 81. fireflies or lightning bugs?-firefly 82. pc or console?-Uhhh idk??? 83. writing or drawing?-writing 84. podcasts or talk radio?-talk radio 84. barbie or polly pocket?-Polly pocket. Forbidden gummy 85. fairy tales or mythology?-mythology 86. cookies or cupcakes?-cupcakes with no icing 87. your greatest fear?-bugs crawling in my ear 88. your greatest wish?-to be successful and happy with a S/O and a daughter on lots of land89. who would you put before everyone else?-my parents 90. luckiest mistake?-There are no mistakes. Everything happens for a reason. 91. boxes or bags?-depends 92. lamps, overhead lights, sunlight or fairy lights?-sunlight93. nicknames?-my dad calls me sissy bug and my mom calls me bamber and my friends call my dumb bitch lol so 94. favorite season?Spring or fall. They’re basically the same in Texas. 95. favorite app on your phone?-social media apps96. desktop background?-I don’t have a desktop but my laptop is just a pre downloaded galaxy ones. 97. how many phone numbers do you have memorized?-mine, my moms, my dads, and my dads business 98. favorite historical era?-ancient Egypt and the 60s

[heartbreakcity]

87.5 RanDoM QuEstiOnS

okayyy, i’ve always wanted to do one of these !! hopefully you all know me a lil better afterwards

tagged by: the lovely @inspiredbynewt

tagging: @gilinswilkwhore & @maximoff-pan

♛ ♛ ♛ ♛ ♛ ♛ ♛

0.5) Name and age? Megan and i’m 16

1. Where do you live? Oxford, England. yes it rains, yes it’s cold.

2. One cool item you own? my record player, and i have my dads old band on vinyl (Faze Action - they’re the bomb.com) and my huge collection of photos clipped to fairy lights is cute

3. Moon or stars? moon

4. Places you’d like to travel to? E V E R Y W H E R E A N D A N Y W H E R E

5. Favourite song? a) A Sky Full Of Stars by Coldplay b) Isombard by Declan McKenna c) December 1963 (Oh What A Night) by Frankie Valley and The Four Seasons

6. Do you have any fears? Yup, it’s called Ostraconaphobia...and yes it’s ridiculous it’s the fear of...shellfish THEY TERRIFY ME I CAND DEal WITH IT

7. Do you feel different than you did last year? i’m so much happier, honestly i’m loving life

8. What is your race? White British

9. Pet peeves? loud and obnoxious people but that’s it.

10. Any siblings? a brother

11. Are you a gamer? depends on the game

12. Sexual orientation? straight

13. Does a broken mirror mean bad luck? oh hell yes

14. What do you feel is your mental age? ranges from a 3 year old to 50 year old

15. How old were you when you started dating? my first proper relationship where i was in love was at the age 15. some say it was too young but this guy was my everything and i saw my whole future with him. pity he said “you’re not good enough”, eh

16. Where do you do most of your online shopping? amazon or asos

17. Favourite animal? penguinsss

18. What’s one film from the 2000s that you like? hands down “13 going on 30” and the classic “Angus, Thongs and Perfect Snogging”

19. What’s your favourite scary movie? hate them with a passion but probs Incidious

20. Fun fact about yourself? i am probably the most musical person you will ever meet - i play trombone, bass guitar, flute, clarinet, piano, keyboard, saxophone, trumpet, baritone, cornet, drums, guitar and i sing.

21. Shoe size? 6

22. Which fictional character(s) do you relate to the most? Betty Cooper, she’s basically my spirit animal and Blair Waldorf

23. Where do you see yourself living in ten years? in america

24. Ever wore clothes that were just wayyy too tight? yes and i still have the scars lmao

25. What’s on your mind? ironic, but i’m thinking about the ex bf who said “you’re not good enough for me” bc hell i miss him

26. Are you religious? yes

27. How tall are you? 5’7”

28. Favourite band? 5sos, The Killers, The Hunna, Jackson 5

29. Do you remember 2009? no i barely remember 3 days ago

30. Cats or dogs? cat person here

31. Fruit or vegetables? veggies

32. Do you want to get married? 100% yes

33. Do you want children? yep, 2

34. Flamingos or peacocks? flamingos they’re so pretty

35. What superpower do you wish you had? mind reading or being able to change minds

36. Are you a germ freak? god yes

37. Did swearing baby, ghost car, or ghost caught on tape scare you as a kid? HELL TO THE YESSSS i had an awful friend who showed all of the above to me

38. Do you prefer sweet or salty? salt. tons of salt pls

39. Tea or coffee? dislike both but coffee cause i like Mochas

40. Are you superstitious? yup. i hold my breath when i pass lorries on the roads, i carry a luck stone with me and wear 2 rings every day in case of bad luck

41. Do you like stripes? i guess?

42. Favourite shows as a kid? teletubbies or the tweenies

43. Favourite shows growing up? victorious, icarly, wizards of waverley place, kickin’ it were the bomb

44. Favourite musical? Kinky Boots, Les Mis, RENT, Jersey boys, FOOTLOOSE HELL YEA

45. Favourite movie? shit there’s a list: Guardians of the galaxy, footloose, the breakfast club, star wars episode VI, the maze runner trilogy, ferris bulers day off, 10 things i hate about you

46. Birthday? 17 december (i’m 16)

47. Are you a grammar Nazi? absolutely. i’m so pedantic

48. Ever gotten drunk? yeah

49. Do you have a carrier bag? huh?

50. What would you do if you were the opposite gender for a day? tell a girl what makes her special

51. If you were the opposite gender what would you change your name to? i’ve looked at this question for 5 mins, idk i love Ashton (yes irwin)

52. What song is stuck in your head? “rent” from rent...

53. Celebrity crush? always = luke hemmings but rn = shia lebouf

54. If you could live in a non-English speaking country, where would it be? spain

55. Are you a good dancer? i like to think i am but really i look awful

56. Have any allergies? to nasty people

57. Any bad habits? i think things over at least 2784 times and then realise, maybe it really was nothing

58. Ever broke a bone? left elbow

59. Are you a city or country person? city, totally

60. Do you like your home country? love it

61. Sunflowers or daisies? daises. have so many memories involving daises

62. Tulips or roses? roses

63. Oak or maple? oak

64. Disney or Nickelodeon? refuse to answer

65. WYR be obese or anorexic? anorexic

66. WYR be over 6 feet or under 5 feet? under 5 ft

67. Rubies or sapphires? sapphires

68. Are you stubborn? look up stubborn in the dictionary you’ll see “Megan”

69. Have you been in scouts/Girl Scouts? yeah, in england you call it “Rainbows” then “Brownies” then “Guides”

70. What type of music do you listen to? EVERYTHING and i mean everything EXCEPT rap/hip hop/dubstep

71. Favourite vine? thomas sanders “narrating people’s lives” with the one about the guy stepping on a snake

72. Beaches or castles? beaches

73. Pick the closest book to you, and write the line for page 36, line 16 -“ - meant adding our own to the pile” it’s from Library Of Souls by Ranson Riggs

74. Anyone in the same room as you right now? nope i’m in bed

75. Which is worse; throwing up or diharreah? throwing up

76. Butterflies or lady bugs? butterflies!!

77. Do you say “K” when you’re not mad? i hate the letter so no

78. How do you react when purposely scare you? i’ll scream. i’ll always scream

79. Most overrated celebrity? the whole kardashian clan #sorrynotsorry

80. Do you have a globe in your room? i wish

81. Do you have a dream catcher in your room? nah

82. What do you see when you look out your window? my allotment, a play park, a graveyard, and fields and barns for miles

83. Have you been on an airplane? yes and i hate it

84. Do you believe in aliens? honestly i believe we can’t be the only ones in the whole entire universe

85. Do you believe in ghosts? in a scary way - no. in a comforting way/family/friends passed way - yes.

86. Do you believe in God? yes

87. Do you believe in yourself? i believe i can do whatever i put my mind to. so yes. i have confidence in myself

[hufflepirate]

Punisher - The Future Starts With Pie

Wow, that’s a terrible title, but in my defense I am very tired.  This is a Punisher fanfic, because apparently that’s a thing I do now.  I thought a lot of the show’s first season was kind of slow and boring, but then I caught feelings and I just really care about the characters and also about the fact that Frank definitely for sure went over to the Liebermans’ after his meeting at the end and then definitely for sure stayed the night/forever and idk if it’s an ot3 kind of situation or just a platonic whoops-you’ve-been-forcibly-adopted-by-a-family kind of thing, but everyone definitely lived happily ever after, of course.  I don’t make the rules.

Possibly some spoilers or whatever.  Nothing really major though, probably.  It’s just set after the end of the season.  I ship Frank Castle with happiness, health, and sleeping well at night for a change.

[This came out longer than I initially intended by a lot, so readmore.  It’ll probably go up on AO3 eventually but meh. Too tired.]

It was good sitting with Curtis and not talking.  He'd talked enough today, more than enough, and it was a relief to sit in front of the football game and just breathe.

He closed his eyes during the commercials, centering himself.  It had been good to talk, to admit to the things he didn't want to say, to work through the things Curtis had been nagging him to deal with for years.  It was also tiring, and he was still a little shaky.

When his phone buzzed, he checked it.  The number wasn't familiar, but it was pretty obvious who it was.  "We all ate 2 much 2 have dessert.  Gonna have pie in abt an hr if u wanna come."  The skull after the first sentence was a little dramatic, and he didn't see why she couldn't have written out 'pie' instead of using an emoji of one, but Frank half smiled at his phone anyway.  He just wasn't quite sure what to say back.

The phone buzzed again.  "This is Leo, btw."  He smiled for real this time.

"You talking to someone I don't know about?" Curtis asked.

Frank shook his head, still smiling faintly even as he blushed a little.  "Nah, just Micro's kid."

"Micro's kid has your phone number?"

"I guess," he answered.  He didn't remember giving it to her, but Leo was clever and he didn't really expect any kid of David's to be good about boundaries.

He put his phone away, not sure quite what to do about that.  The thought of going over there for pie was not awful, but that didn't mean it was a good idea.  Curtis was right about him.  He was a shit magnet.  If he went over there now, it would be the start of something, and starting something was dangerous.

The phone buzzed again twenty minutes later.  An unlisted number, not that that much mattered when he opened the message, either. "Just realized Leo stole my phone. Sorry. Invite still stands though."

Frank's fingers itched to say something.  Something about David not being an asshole for once, maybe.  Something about his family being good for him.  Something about his kids being assholes like him.  Something about how he could be there in a few minutes.  But he shouldn't.  He shouldn't.  He put his phone back in his pocket.

After another five minutes, it buzzed again.

"Don't be an asshole.  Just get over here."  Frank felt the corners of his mouth threatening to creep upward again.  A moment later, the phone buzzed again.  "Hope your meeting was good."

"Chatty kid," Curtis commented.

"This time it's her dad."

"Chatty family, then."

"I guess."

He shoved his phone back in his pocket again, hoping it would stop Curtis from looking at him like that.

"You gonna answer him?"

"If he wants to know where I am, he can track my phone."

It wasn't really an answer, but he didn't really have an answer.  Not one he could give without using more words than he had left after this morning.  He wanted to text back.  He didn't have the words for that, either.

Curtis laughed.  "You guys are a mess."

Frank grunted.  That was probably true enough.  Just another reason to stay away.   Didn't make it easier to tell the Liebermans that.

It was fully 45 minutes later before his phone buzzed again.  Sarah, this time.  "Need you to help with my asshole kid again. Zach wants pie, but David keeps looking at the door and telling him not yet."

Frank groaned.  At this point, it was all starting to look like a setup, but that didn't make it any easier to resist the impulse to fall into the trap anyway.

"Alright, spill," Curtis said. "You look constipated."

"They want me to go eat pie with them."

"So go eat pie.  Weren't you just talking about trying to build a life?"

Frank grunted.  He was.  Had been.  Should be.

Curtis rolled his eyes.  "Come on, man, what's the worst that could happen?"

“I’m a shit magnet," Frank answered.

"Yeah, well, so's Lieberman.  You might as well try to have his back."

Frank grunted back.

"Do you want to go?"

Frank didn't answer right away and Curtis half growled under his breath.  "Come on, man.  Don't overthink it.  I asked what you want."

"Yeah, I guess," Frank admitted.

"You don't guess," Curtis answered, "You're just scared.  Go anyway."

"What if they expect me to come over again after that?"

Curtis studied him for a moment.  "What makes you think they won't either way?"

Frank grunted again.  That was a good point, but it didn't make it less important to take a stand now.

"Frank, you said it yourself.  Your war is over.  Go home."

"I can't," he said, almost before Curtis had finished.

"Look, I'm not saying it'll be like having Maria and the kids back.  It won't.  But you've got to build something, and having people in your life who aren't me is a good thing.  Go."

His phone buzzed again, and this time he was sure it was a conspiracy.  Another number he didn't have programmed in, but the "I'm hungry" with 10 skulls after it had to be Zach.

"See, it's a sign," Curtis said.

"Yeah," he said, turning the phone toward Curtis's chair and pointing at the skulls.  "A sign that this is a bad idea."

"Frank, you spray painted a skull onto the front of your tach vest.  They might be a sign it's a good idea.  Not that the whole Punisher thing was a great idea, actually, but that worked out in the end, at least.  Kind of."

Frank grunted again, but Curtis just settled back into his seat, looking pleased.  He knew he'd won.

Frank pulled himself to his feet as he started working on his reply text.  "20 min."

Zach sent back another skull before Frank had made it all the way out to his truck, but Frank actually felt good about ignoring that one.

As he pulled up outside the Lieberman house, he thought about driving away instead, but then he was parked and he'd set the parking brake and he was here for good, somehow.  He got out, eyes locking onto the glow from the windows even as he closed his door.

On the porch, his fingers hovered beside the doorbell for a second before he thought better of it.  He knocked with his usual force, but it still wouldn't carry as far as the doorbell.  If they didn't hear, they didn't really want him, and he could turn around and leave again.  That would be safer, anyway.

The door flew open after only a few seconds and Leo barrelled into him, hugging him around the middle.  "I told you!" she said, "I told you he'd come!"

Frank hugged her in return, feeling a little awkward as he patted her on the back.  Sarah was laughing at him.  "Finally!  I thought you might actually be about to ditch us."

"Yeah," David agreed. "'Cause he's an asshole.  Good to see you."

"Can we please have pie now?"  Zach sounded impatient, but Frank noticed that he'd also stepped toward the door instead of toward the kitchen when he got off the couch.

Frank glanced toward the TV.  "Charlie Brown Thanksgiving, huh?"

"Yeah," Leo said, "We watch it every year.  But the rest can wait 'til after pie!"

He let himself be dragged into the kitchen, where Leo dropped her grip on his hand just in time for Sarah to guide him toward the counter with a light hand on his shoulder.  "David, get over here," she said, "You always cut the most even pieces."

David groaned and rolled his eyes, but the huge smile on his face proved he didn't mean it.  "I got it."

Zach squeezed himself into the space between Frank and David, reaching for the first piece of pie almost before David could get it on the plate, but Frank couldn't step back out of his way because Sarah was there, too close, and he had to take a deep breath to steady himself.  He felt a little trapped.

David shoved the second plate of pie into his hands harder than necessary and Frank put the pieces together.  They were worried he was going to leave, even though he’d just gotten here.

As soon as he'd figured it out, it made sense.  He was still a little rattled from the meeting, and he wasn't sure he'd remembered to smile.  Not that he was always great at making the attempt anyway.  But he might still have enough energy left in the tank to fake one good one, and maybe that would be enough.  Enough to convince them he meant to be here.  Except he wasn’t sure he did.  He just knew there was a part of him that wanted it, and Curtis had told him to listen to that part.

As soon as Leo had her pie he turned toward her, trying not to bump into Sarah in the process, and was surprised at how much easier it was to smile than he'd expected.  "Alright, so where should I sit?"

Zach was a few feet behind his sister, out of the scrum and already digging into his piece of pie, right there in the middle of the kitchen.  Sarah snorted lightly behind him, amused, but he didn't think Zach could hear.  "Zachary Leiberman, you wait for everybody else."

"But mom-" Zach started, mouth full.

"No buts.  Your dad's almost done."

"I think we should sit on the couch," Leo said, "So we can finish Charlie Brown.  Don't you think, mom?"

Sarah looked at Leo, then at Frank, the table, and Frank again, and then she said, "Sure, sounds good.  Just don't spill."

"Pie doesn't spill," Zach said, "It's not a liquid."

"Don't talk back to your mother," David said, the same huge grin wrecking the intensity of it.  It was weird to watch him happy like this.  It was good, too.

David handed Sarah a piece of pie and started cutting one for himself, and Frank found himself getting dragged off again, Leo's grip surprisingly strong for a little girl.  "Anyway," she said, "The dishwasher's been making this weird noise, so I thought we'd take a look at it after the movie, before we try to make it do all the Thanksgiving dishes.   Since it's gonna be such a big load, you know?"

He'd known it.  He'd known coming here was going to be the start of something he had no right to start, and now here he was, right up at the edge of it.

"I dunno, kid, your dad's home now, so I'm not sure I need to-"

"Fine with me," David interrupted, "It's not like there's anybody we can call to look at it on Thanksgiving anyway."

He could tell from the way David didn't quite meet his eyes that he recognized it as the betrayal it was, but he couldn't exactly get mad about it with Leo still looking up at him with those big little-girl eyes.

"Would you mind?" Sarah asked, "Leo's been bugging me about letting her open it up for a week, and it would be nice if she had some supervision."

Frank grunted.  For a moment, Leo looked confused, and he remembered that he'd usually forced himself to be a little more communicative as Pete.  And sometimes he hadn't forced it at all.  "Alright," he said, clarifying the grunt for her.  "Can't hurt to take a look."

It could hurt.  It could hurt all of them.  Somehow.

He wasn't surprised to be half-shoved into a seat in the middle of the couch, and he wasn't surprised when Leo sat close to him, but he was surprised by how close Zach sat on his other side, close enough that he was a little worried he might accidentally elbow the kid in the ribs when he started eating.

There almost wasn't room for Sarah to join them, but they all scooted over as she jammed herself between Leo and the arm of the couch, Zach sneaking a bite of pie as soon as his mother was distracted with fishing a throw pillow out from under herself.

Frank could swear David was practically laughing at him as he came and took a seat on the opposite arm, beside his son.  The longer Frank looked up at him, the more his eyes seemed to twinkle.

Leo reached forward and grabbed for the remote, restarting Charlie Brown, and Frank tried to calm himself down.  He wasn't trapped.  If he really wanted to leave, they would let him.  If someone came charging in and attacked them, they'd get out of the way fast enough for him to defend them.  They knew who he was.  What he was.  They'd get out of his way, if they had to.  Everything was fine.

He managed to eat his pie, because he didn't want them to know anything was wrong, but the movie was just noise in front of him, and he couldn't make sense of it.  Breathe in.  Breathe out.  Chew.  Swallow.  The pie was good, and eating it felt good, and the longer nothing went wrong, the easier it was to focus on balancing whipped cream and pumpkin and pie crust in every bite and to keep breathing.  Something tight in his chest started to unknot itself.  Nothing was going wrong.  That feeling that something was about to was probably wrong.  Nothing was wrong.

It was still a relief when the credits rolled and they could all get up off the couch.  It was good to have breathing room, and even better to have something to do when Leo dragged him off to fix the washing machine.

They ran the machine empty, so he could listen to the noise, but when he told her he had only half a guess about what was wrong, it didn't deter her at all.  She'd read the manual, after all.  And she'd googled some diagrams of washing machines.  She already knew how to cut power and water to the dishwasher so they could disconnect it.  She was sure they could figure it out.  He couldn't figure out how to tell her no, especially not with David beaming at her, pride written all over his face.

As he let Leo run across the house to pull the fuse for the kitchen appliances and shut off the water, he couldn't shake the feeling that this was a bad idea.  He was getting in too deep.  There was no going back from this.

David's eyes locked onto his for a moment, and he wasn't sure what David saw there, but his friend immediately stepped toward the dishwasher with a shrug and said "I guess I'll help, too.”

Frank couldn't decide if David joining them was a chance to escape this, or just another sign that he was in over his head.

When Leo came back, Frank pulled the dishwasher out of its cabinet so that they could get to it better, and it was too late.  Whatever this was, he'd started it.  It was happening.  Leo was halfway underfoot as soon as the back of the dishwasher was visible, and a little nagging part of him couldn't even be upset about it.

Somewhere between realizing they needed to disassemble a large portion of the dishwasher, realizing they weren't sure they could put it back together, and figuring out how to fix it, the feeling of impending doom went away.  Frank couldn't explain it, exactly, but as the clock ticked later and later and the day caught up to him more and more, it also got easier to accept that things might not be wrong.  They might not be awful.  They might be ok.

When it was all back together again, Leo beamed and David helped him slot the appliance back into its cabinet.  He'd have turned down the help a few hours ago, but the moment the project was done, he'd felt a wave of exhaustion wash over him, and David was probably the only person in the world he was actually used to letting help him when he felt that way.

Leo yawned as she walked out of the kitchen to turn the water and power back on, and David leaned slightly against him.  Frank thought he should probably shove the man over to lean against the counters instead, but then he'd have to lean against the counter himself, instead of letting David counterbalance him, and he wasn't sure it was worth it.

Sarah came in with Leo to listen to the newly fixed dishwasher and took one look at the three of them before declaring, "Alright, that's it for tonight.  I'll set up a bed for you on the couch, Pete."

"No, that's not-"

Before he could say 'necessary,' David interrupted, still leaning against his shoulder.  "Frank.  'S Frank."

"Pete's fine," Frank said, and then he hadn't said no to the couch, and he was too tired to do anything about it when Leo followed up another yawn with "It's alright, Mom, I can get it.  I know you wanted to load the dishwasher now that it's fixed."  She moved faster than the yawn had suggested, and then she was gone.

"She's a good kid," David said.

"Yeah," Frank agreed.

"You too tired to help, babe?" Sarah asked.

"Zach can help," David said, the best indication of all that he was feeling just as tired as Frank was. "His sister did all the hard parts."

"Zach's in bed.  It's almost 1 in the morning."

"Oh," David said.

"Why are you still up?" Frank asked, "You could have gone to bed."

"I had a few things to get ready for Black Friday tomorrow.  It's ok.  I'm used to running on three hours of sleep."

Frank stifled a groan at the thought.  He functioned perfectly well on little sleep, when he had to.  But somehow, for the first time in a long time, he just couldn't convince himself that he had to.  He'd been right about this whole pie thing.  Something was different now, and he couldn't get his head around it.  He just knew he felt something, under the exhaustion, and it was something good instead of something bad, and he didn't know what to do with that.  Didn't know how to name that.  Wasn't sure he knew how to feel it.

When Leo shuffled into the doorway of the kitchen with an armful of blankets, David started steering both of them toward the door to meet her, and Frank let him lead the way, finally stepping away from the other man so that David stumbled a little without the support of Frank's shoulder against his and Frank had to reach out and steady him.

This was funny.  It was like they were drunk.  But they weren't.  This was something else.  Something different.  The crash after the adrenaline, but he couldn't remember the last time he'd let go of the fight long enough for that.  Frank snorted, amused, and David swiped at him ineffectively.  "Asshole.  S'not nice to laugh.  I'm tired."

"Yeah, but we did it!" Leo said, "I told you we could!"  The encouragement was nice, but a little undermined by her third yawn in almost as many minutes.

"You should be getting to bed, too, baby girl," David said.

Leo shook her head.  "I'm almost done.  I already grabbed a pillow."

Frank hurried forward, half stumbling as he reached for the blankets.  "It's alright, Leo," he said, "I can take care of myself."

She tugged the blankets away from him.  "Yeah, but we can take care of you, too."

There was something there.  Something.  He wondered if they'd talked about him after he dropped David off at their door.  He wondered what they'd said.  They made it to the couch, and he stopped wondering because he needed to focus on helping with the blankets, untangling them and laying them out neatly so Leo would stop worrying about him and go to bed.

David tried to help too, and six hands were too many, and Leo giggled tiredly as they made a mess of it, and Frank felt the edges of his mouth pull up into a smile he was definitely too tired for, because smiling was work and he was done working.

"Stop smiling and go to sleep," David said, "It's late.  I can't believe you took apart my dishwasher."

"You're an asshole," he answered, only remembering after it came out soft that he was supposed to at least pretend he meant it.

Once the blankets were good enough, he pulled them back and collapsed onto the couch, a little harder than he might have let himself anywhere else when all he was was tired and not injured.  He reached for the blankets before David or Leo could pull them over him, not quite ready to be quite that - something.  Whatever.  Even this tired, that felt like too much.

David and Leo stood over him for a second, just staring, like they'd run out of gas, but then David broke the silence, sliding an arm around Leo's shoulders.  "Alright, help your old man up the stairs."  She did, the two of them stepping out toward the staircase. "See you tomorrow, Frank," he said over his shoulder.

Frank grunted back, but then realized that wouldn't do for Leo.  "Night."

She turned to look over her shoulder at him before she and David could start climbing the stairs.  "Night, Pete."

"Sleep well," he managed.

This time, she didn't answer, she and her father both too focused on the stairs in front of them.  That was good.  The lights were still on, but Frank didn't much want to get up and turn them off.  It wasn't like he couldn't sleep anywhere he set his mind to, anyway.

He was halfway asleep already when Sarah finished up with the dishes and came over to the couch to smooth the blankets over him.  He'd heard the dishwasher start, and he'd heard her footsteps moving toward him, and the only surprise was that it didn't bother him having her suddenly close to him, in his space, smoothing down his blankets.

"Shh," she said, before he could say anything, "Go to sleep."

He was too tired to nod, but he managed a grunt and her mouth quirked up at the corner.  "I'll get the light on my way past," she said, "You know where the bathroom is.  And the glasses in the kitchen."  He grunted again.  "See you in the morning."

Then she was gone.

The minute the lights switched off, he felt his eyes falling shut.  Just when it had become least necessary to keep them closed.  Her footsteps on the stairs got farther away, then the tone of them changed as she hit flat ground, then her bedroom door closed.  He should open his eyes again.  Should keep watch.  Should make sure everything was still ok.

He didn’t.  There was something missing in the middle of his chest, something that was meant to be telling him everything was wrong and everything was dangerous, something that wasn’t there and wasn’t doing that and everything - everything felt ok.

He drifted off, expecting Maria and the nightmares that so often followed her. Instead his sleep was deep and strong and dreamless, for the first time in a long time.

[surveysonfleek]

240.

1. Do you put anything besides cheese on grilled cheese sandwiches? ham and tomato. yum.

2. Are there times when you think your reflection looks amazing, but you take a picture and it looks like crap? all the damn time.

3. Would you rather sit in a recliner or a rocking chair? recliner.

4. Do you take advantage of calendars being on sale during the end of January, or do you just buy them for their regular price when they first come out? i never buy calendars. for diaries i like buying them for regular price coz i get too excited in filling out the new year.

5. Would you ever be interested in going scuba-diving? yeah but i think i’d be too paranoid to do it. i’m not the best swimmer diving-wise.

6. Have you ever absent-mindedly (or even intentionally) pulled apart the aglets (plastic at the end) on your shoelaces/hoodie and ruined the lace? hmmm pretty sure i did that as a kid.

7. Do you ever use natural lighting to light your house (aka open the blinds) rather than use a lamp? yeah during the day, obvs.

8. What is a hobby/activity that you find relaxing? Is this something you often get the chance to do? colouring.

9. Do you think cable/satellite is worth paying for when things like Netflix and Hulu exist? no. definitely not anymore.

10. Do you think greetings cards are a waste of money? yes. i grew up making my own damn greeting cards. more sentimental lol.

11. Is this the best year of your life? not the best, not the worst.

12. Is anything bothering you? nope.

13. Would you like things to “go back to normal” with a certain someone? nope.

14. What was the last thing you did before you went to bed last night? reading a summary on got.

15. Ever told your parents you were going somewhere but went somewhere else? haha who hasn’t?

16. Are you dating the last person you kissed on the lips? yes.

17. Three days from now will you be in a relationship? yes.

18. Have you kissed anyone in the last month? yes.

19. Do you like being home alone or does it freak you out? i’m fine with it.

20. Would you ever kiss anyone you texted today? yes, my boyfriend.

21. Do you have any bruises on you? nope.

22. How was 2011 for you? ummm. i actually don’t even remember 2011 that much. i went to philippines at the end of the year though, that was cool.

23. Have you ever been told that you are amazing? yes.

24. Finish this sentence: “The last person I kissed is …” dwayne.

25. Waiting for something? to fall asleep.

26. Was last night terrible? nah.

27. Is tomorrow going to be a good day? i can’t wait until work is over tbh.

28. You think anyone’s thinking about you right now? nope.

29. Is the last person you texted single? no.

30. Someone knocks on your window at 5AM; what do you say? how’d you get up here?

31. Would you change yourself for the person you love? only if it would make me a better person in the long run.

32. Did your last kiss take place on a bed? no.

33. Do you talk in your sleep? no.

34. Are you currently looking forward to anything? yupppp.

35. Do you care too much/not at all/just enough? in the middle.

36. Where is the person who has your heart at the moment? at home.

37. Would you rather have roommates or live alone? either my sister, boyfriend or alone lol.

38. Will you be in a relationship next month? yes.

39. What have you done today? nothing. i was sick so i bought meds, slept allllll day, had sushi for dinner and now i’m chilling.

40. Do you trust people easily? no.

41. How many true friends do you have? under ten definitely.

42. Have you ever worn the opposite sex’s clothing? yes.

43. Is there a certain person that makes you feel safe? yes.

44. Have you ever slept in the same bed with the last person you kissed? yes.

45. Is your room ever clean? haha sometimes.

46. Have you ever told someone of the opposite sex you loved them? yes.

47. Will your next kiss be a mistake? no.

48. What’s a concern of yours right now? i just hope i’m not sick tomorrow.

49. Are you keeping a secret right now? nope.

50. What is you had a baby with the last person you texted? lol i’d keep it.

51. How many times is “A” in your full name? once.

52. Anything you’d like to say to someone? nope.

53. What size is the last bed you kissed on? a king single.

54. When was the last time you were sick? today :(

55. How many more days until your birthday? three and a bit months.

56. Do you have any good friends of the opposite sex? yup.

57. How many more years of high school do you have? i finished high school years ago.

58. Would you rather sleep with someone else or alone? alone. unless my bed was huge.

59. When will your next kiss be? thursday.

60. Who was the first male you talked to today? my boyfriend.

61. How long does it take you to fall asleep at night? depends how tired i am. maybe 30 mins.

62. Is there a night you would like to repeat and allow it to live on forever? hmm nope hhaa.

63. Did you ever build furniture forts as a child? yessss.

64. Would you consider yourself to be mature? yep.

65. Do you require a lot of private time? not a lot. but i need it sometimes.

66. Have you ever attempted to make anything crafty? yes.

67. What is your least favourite holiday? new years, my boyfriend and i always argue over where to have it.

68. What is your favourite book series, if you have one? harry potter for sure.

69. If the last person you kissed invited you to a family dinner, would you go? yes.

70. Has anyone ever told one of your secrets that they promised they wouldn’t tell? yup.

71. Do you think you could survive living by yourself for a month? i have.

72. Have you ever lent the last person you called money? nope.

72. How come you kissed the last person you kissed? it was a goodbye kiss.

73. Would you be able to live without the last person you fought with? yes.

74. Would you be able to tell me your mum’s favourite food? ummm. cake haha.

75. Has anyone seen you naked in the past forty-eight hours? yes.

76. Is there anything in your room your parents would be pissed about? not really.

77. Do you have any friends who never shut up about their boyfriend/girlfriend? no, thankfully.

78. Have you ever helped someone while they were drunk, puking? haha yes.

79. Would you rather have a pet snake or a pet cat? honestly neither.

80. Are you welcome at the last person you kissed’s home? yes.

81. Did you have any unread texts when you woke up today? yes.

82. Does it annoy you when you can’t find the remote? yes.

83. Can you sleep easier with the TV on or off? off.

84. Have you ever kissed the last person you texted? yes.

85. Is the last person you kissed black? he’s mixed with black.

86. Would you sleep in the same bed with the last person you texted? yeah.

87. Do you think it’s disgusting for girls to drink alcohol and get drunk? haha no. why just girls?

88. Has the last person you kissed ever seen you cry? yes.

89. Do you have a member of the opposite sex you tell everything to? yes.

90. Are you nice to everyone? generally. unless they give me a reason not to be.

91. Day been rough? just boring.

92. Will your next kiss be a mistake? no.

93. Your last kiss probably meant nothing, right? it did.

94. Would it be weird if the last person you kissed called you? no.

95. It’s two in the morning, and you get a text; who is it most likely from? my boyfriend.

96. Whose vehicle besides family were you in last? my boyfriend’s.

97. Will you sleep alone tonight? yes.

98. Do you know what the last person you kissed is doing right now? sleeping.

99. Do you think things will change in the next few months? hopefully.

100. Does anyone not like you at the moment? prob.

101. Has anyone put their arms around you today? yes.

102. Can you last in a relationship for six months? yes.

103. Has anything upset you in the last week? yes.

104. Anyone you’re giving up on? no.

105. Did you have a better day yesterday or today? today.

106. Does anyone call you babe or baby? yes, baby.

107. What do you bite more; tongue, lip, or cheek? lips.

108. Who did you have a meaningful conversation with last? my boyfriend.

109. Connection between you and the last person who texted you? boyfriend.

110. I bet you’re going to kiss someone tomorrow, right? no.

111. Last awkward moment? hmmm idk.

112. Are all guys players and cheaters? not all.

113. Do you wish someone would turn up at your front door right now? no.

114. Do you think anyone has feelings for you? yes.

115. When was the last time you received a hug? tonight.

116. Who were you with the last time you went to the mall? my dad and sis.

117. Have you ever been in trouble for something you didn’t do? yes.

118. Are you anything like you were at this point last year? sorta.

119. Who was the last person who said they loved you? my boyfriend.

120. Have you ever been called heartless? yes. i’m not though.

121. Would you rather go forward or back a week? forward.

122. Do you have a really big stuffed animal? yes.

123. What is your least favourite subject? maths.

124. What are you going to do after this? idk this survey started off strong but got boring as fuck. don’t think i can do another one right now.

[haught-at-waverly-place]

answer all of them

answers under the cut! only doing this cause im that bored

200: My crush’s name is: no one 199: I was born in: 1996198: I am really: bored197: My cellphone company is: wtf who cares?? 196: My eye color is: green/blue 195: My shoe size is: 6.5194: My ring size is: idk small 193: My height is: smol 192: I am allergic to: cats and all of nature in the spring and summer 191: My 1st car was: an hhr or as i liked to call it a poor mans hearse190: My 1st job was: an in home care taker aka i cleaned elderly peoples homes189: Last book you read: god i dont read188: My bed is: my best friend 187: My pet: is the loml 186: My best friend: she lives too far away tbh 185: My favorite shampoo is: i use old spice 2-in-1 like the basic bitch i am184: Xbox or ps3: ps3??? what year is it the switch is where its mfkin at 183: Piggy banks are: dope af 182: In my pockets: nothing cause im a broke bitch 181: On my calendar: nothing cause im a boring bitch 180: Marriage is: cool good on everyone who is married to their best friends 179: Spongebob can: new spongebob can die cause its garbage 178: My mom: is the best 177: The last three songs I bought were? who buys songs? 176: Last YouTube video watched: air crash investigations (dont ask) 175: How many cousins do you have? idk 174: Do you have any siblings? one sister 173: Are your parents divorced? nah 172: Are you taller than your mom? nah 171: Do you play an instrument? i used to play the violin and guitar but not anymore 170: What did you do yesterday? tried not to die [ I Believe In ]169: Love at first sight: idk maybe? 168: Luck: sure 167: Fate: yeah sure 166: Yourself: hahahahahahahahahahahahaha no 165: Aliens: fuck yeah 164: Heaven: ehhh no 163: Hell: no 162: God: not really 161: Horoscopes: lowkey160: Soul mates: every one has one 159: Ghosts: kind of 158: Gay Marriage: nah why would gays want to get married 157: War: war is p stupid 156: Orbs: wtf is an orb??155: Magic: no [ This or That ]154: Hugs or Kisses: kisses 153: Drunk or High: drunk 152: Phone or Online: online 151: Red heads or Black haired: black 150: Blondes or Brunettes: brunettes 149: Hot or cold: cold 148: Summer or winter: winter 147: Autumn or Spring: autumn 146: Chocolate or vanilla: vanilla 145: Night or Day: night 144: Oranges or Apples: apples 143: Curly or Straight hair: curly 142: McDonalds or Burger King: mcdonalds 141: White Chocolate or Milk Chocolate: this is dark chocolate erasure and i will not stand for it 140: Mac or PC: mac 139: Flip flops or high heals: neither both are garbage for the feet 138: Ugly and rich OR sweet and poor: im already sweet and poor sooooo137: Coke or Pepsi: where is my dr. pepper representation 136: Hillary or Obama: obama 135: Burried or cremated: cremated id like to go out in a burnin glory even if im already dead 134: Singing or Dancing: singing 133: Coach or Chanel: neither 132: Kat McPhee or Taylor Hicks: who are you people 131: Small town or Big city: big city 130: Wal-Mart or Target: im a lesbian so target obviously 129: Ben Stiller or Adam Sandler: neither 128: Manicure or Pedicure: pedicure only cause they message my feet and legs 127: East Coast or West Coast: west coast 126: Your Birthday or Christmas: xmas cause snow 125: Chocolate or Flowers: chocolate 124: Disney or Six Flags: disney 123: Yankees or Red Sox: neither who cares about baseball [ Here’s What I Think About ]122: War: men bein garbage 121: George Bush: why? 120: Gay Marriage: hell yeah we got it 119: The presidential election: we might as well have elected a crackhead 118: Abortion: let women get them safely so they dont fucking die its that simple117: MySpace: jesus is it 2006 again 116: Reality TV: its trashy but ill watch it cause im trash 115: Parents: love your parents kids (unless they are abusive) 114: Back stabbers: are awful just like maybe dont stab people in the back literally and metaphorically 113: Ebay: ive literally never used ebay in my life 112: Facebook: its p garbage i barely ever use it 111: Work: capitalism has killed workers and quality work 110: My Neighbors: they are there 109: Gas Prices: i havent gotten gas in like 2 months so like idk 108: Designer Clothes: why are they all like so ugly??107: College: stressful and only vaguely worth something 106: Sports: fun to play but boring to watch. i only go to sporting events for the alcohol 105: My family: is v dope and i love them 104: The future: stressful and i hate thinking about it [ Last time I ]103: Hugged someone: last night it was my dad 102: Last time you ate: last night lol 101: Saw someone I haven’t seen in awhile: probably back in december with my best friend 100: Cried in front of someone: oooof all the time 99: Went to a movie theater: like 2 wks ago 98: Took a vacation: january i went on a cruise 97: Swam in a pool: last summer i think 96: Changed a diaper: uhhh never…. 95: Got my nails done: god way back in high school when i thought i was straight 94: Went to a wedding: last friday! 93: Broke a bone: 3 wks ago haha 92: Got a peircing: i havent gotten a piercing since i was like 6 91: Broke the law: uhhh i plead the fifth 90: Texted: i texted my mom like 40 mins ago [ MISC ]89: Who makes you laugh the most: myself 88: Something I will really miss when I leave home is: my dog shes so cute 87: The last movie I saw: spiderman into the spiderverse 86: The thing that I’m looking forward to the most: a vacation to see my aunt in indiana 85: The thing im not looking forward to: going back to school 84: People call me: uhhh my name? 83: The most difficult thing to do is: rn? pretty much everything 82: I have gotten a speeding ticket: never 81: My zodiac sign is: im a leo 80: The first person i talked to today was: my mom 79: First time you had a crush: first time i remember was freshman yr of college 78: The one person who i can’t hide things from: my mom 77: Last time someone said something you were thinking: i dont remember 76: Right now I am talking to: nobody im a lonely bitch 75: What are you going to do when you grow up: hopefully something to do with neuropsychology 74: I have/will get a job: 73: Tomorrow: wtf does this even mean 72: Today: or this one 71: Next Summer: and this one 70: Next Weekend: and even this one 69: I have these pets: a golden retriever mix 68: The worst sound in the world: 67: The person that makes me cry the most is: hahaha myself 66: People that make you happy: my family and friends 65: Last time I cried: yesterday 64: My friends are: amazing wonderful people that i love 63: My computer is: my lifeline 62: My School: is small but good 61: My Car: is a lesbian wagon that looks like i live in it 60: I lose all respect for people who: cheat on their s/o 59: The movie I cried at was: i dont usually cry during movies 58: Your hair color is: confusing kind of blonde also kind of brown 57: TV shows you watch: she ra, killing eve, grey anatomy too many others to list 56: Favorite web site: youtube 55: Your dream vacation: to go to germany 54: The worst pain I was ever in was: idk maybe my post surgery foot pain 53: How do you like your steak cooked: medium rare the only way a steak should be eaten 52: My room is: always a disaster 51: My favorite celebrity is: taylor swift 50: Where would you like to be: idk 49: Do you want children: noooo 48: Ever been in love: yes i have 47: Who’s your best friend: we aint naming names on here 46: More guy friends or girl friends: girl friends45: One thing that makes you feel great is: playing with my dog 44: One person that you wish you could see right now: A43: Do you have a 5 year plan: god no i dont even have a 5 hour plan 42: Have you made a list of things to do before you die: nah 41: Have you pre-named your children: nope40: Last person I got mad at: myself39: I would like to move to: somewhere other than where i am now 38: I wish I was a professional: at being not depressed [ My Favorites ]37: Candy: bottle caps or ritter sports 36: Vehicle: subaru wrx hatchbacks with a wide body kit are b nice 35: President: who tf has a favorite president 34: State visited: oregon or washington 33: Cellphone provider: who has a fave cell provider???32: Athlete: none31: Actor: idk like chris pratt or something 30: Actress: rn jodie comer 29: Singer: hayley williams 28: Band: paramore 27: Clothing store: h&m 26: Grocery store: target 25: TV show: law and order svu 24: Movie: princess mononoke 23: Website: youtube 22: Animal: red panda 21: Theme park: disneyland 20: Holiday: halloween 19: Sport to watch: none they are all hella boring 18: Sport to play: softball 17: Magazine: none i dont read 16: Book: i dont read books cant concentrate for that long 15: Day of the week: idk saturday 14: Beach: ive been to a beach like 3 times and i barely remember them 13: Concert attended: paramore after laughter concert last summer 12: Thing to cook: cooking stresses me the fuck out so i dont have a favorite thing to cook 11: Food: pasta!! 10: Restaurant: uhhh i dont really have one 9: Radio station: its 2019 who listens to the radio 8: Yankee candle scent: i dont really use candles 7: Perfume: i dont wear perfume 6: Flower: peach roses probably 5: Color: red 4: Talk show host: i dont watch talk shows they are all boring 3: Comedian: john mulaney or iliza schlesinger 2: Dog breed: corgi 1: Did you answer all these truthfully? hahahahaha

[haphazardstudy]

92 Questions Tag

Rules: Answer these 92 statements and tag 20 people

I was tagged by the lovely lovely @seatudying and @colbystudies (and I feel like maybe someone else too? ahh sorry!), please follow them if you don’t already! 💛

I’m putting most of this under the cut because it’s SO LONG and also I feel like I always tag the same people in tag things so if you’re someone who likes to be tagged in things then please let me know so I can tag you!!!!! I don’t want to spam people who don’t want to be tagged!

Last: 1. Drink: teaaaaaa 2: Phone Call:  my mum, calling me to come get her and the dogs from the park because she didn’t want to walk the whole way home again 3. Text Message: my granny, asking if she needed anything from the shop lol 4. Song you listened to: teenage dream (glee cover bc EW katy perry) 5. Time you cried: I cry from laughing on a fairly regular basis tbh sooo yesterday, but if sad crying then I can’t remember tbh

Have you: 6. Dated someone twice: this implies I’ve even dated once lol 7. Kissed someone and regretted it: ahahahaa kissing... 8. Been cheated on: nope 9. Lost someone special: yeah 10. Been depressed: honestly not sure but I think so 11. Gotten drunk and thrown up: nope, no drinking for me thank yoouuu

List 3 favourite colors: 12-14: warm yellow, light pink, teal

In the last year have you: 15. Made new friends: yes!!! 16. Fallen out of love: nopeeee gotta be in it to fall out 17. Laughed until you cried: oh definitely! see number 5 18. Found out someone was talking about you: not that I remember 19. Met someone who changed you: nah 20. Found out who your friends are: what ???? 21. Kissed someone on your Facebook list: I’ve never kissed anyone lol sorry to disappoint

General: 22. How many of your Facebook friends do you know in real life: all of them except like 4 ppl I’m friends with and talk to loads but haven’t met irl 23. Do you have any pets: yep! 4 cats and 2 dogs 24. Do you want to change your name: eh, sometimes, because it’s so plain 25. What did you do for your last birthday: literally nothing wooo summer birthdays when everyone is busy/on holiday are just great 26. What time did you wake up: like 7:30 probably 27. What were you doing at midnight last night: sleeping 28: Name something you can’t wait for: going to uni!!!! basically getting to start a new and independent life 29. When was the last time you saw your mom: about an hour ago 30. What is one thing you wish you could change in your life: I’d love to lose some weight but lol I’m so lazy and exercise is hard 31. What are you listening to right now: a clock ticking lol 32. Have you ever talked to a person named Tom: yes 33. Something that is getting on your nerves: nothing atm 34. Most visited websites: tumblr, youtube, twitter 35. Mole/s: I got plenty (really tho I have loads of moles) 36. Mark/s: the dark mark 37. Childhood dream: I don’t think I ever rly had one lol how sad (maybe to be a singer? that’s still my dream tbh tho) 38: Hair colour: dark brown 39: Long or short hair: longish ??? 40. Do you have a crush on someone: nopeee 41. What do you like about yourself: idk I have good morals? like I don’t even have the capacity to understand why someone would do or say something mean or cruel 42. Piercings: none! 43. Blood type: I actually have no idea 44. Nickname: one certain friend calls me softie, my dad calls me dufus or snowflake 45. Relationship status: single 46. Zodiac: leo 47. Pronouns: she/her 48. Favorite TV Show: currently BBC Merlin 💛 49. Tattoos: not interested tbh I have a low pain tolerance and I’m indecisive so tattoos don’t sound like a good idea for me 50. Right or left hand: right 51. Surgery: no[e 52. Hair dyed in different color: no but I’ve thought about dying it like ginger or something lol 53. Sport: literally nothing how sad 55. Vacation: I’m going to London in August ye buddyyyyy 56. Pair of trainers: what ???? whatever idk

More general: 57. Eating: I’m not great at eating tbh like I have a small appetite generally BUT I could eat entire packets of biscuits and I rly want some cookies rn 58. Drinking: always water # don’t hate hydrate 59. I’m about to: answer the rest of these then GO TO SLEEP 61. Waiting for: my birthday wooooo 62. Want: books 63: Get married: I will eventually but not for a good few years yet I hope 64. Career: not sure tbh but I’ve thought about teaching physics

Which is better: 65: Hugs or kisses: HUGS ALWAYS. GET UR SLIMY KISSES AWAY FROM ME 66: Lips or eyes: eyes 67. Shorter or taller: whatever 68. Older or younger: older ??? but like not much either way 70. Nice arms or nice stomach: arms probably idk 71. Sensitive or loud: sensitive pls 72. Hook up or relationship: relationship 73. Troublemaker or hesitant: who would even pick troublemaker? are you okay????

Have you ever: 74. Kissed a stranger: nope 75: Drank hard liquor: nope 76. Lost glasses/contact lenses: I lost my glasses for like 5 mins one morning bc I woke up and couldn’t see that they’d fallen under my bed somehow 77. Turned someone down: does it count if we were like 8 lol 78. Sex on the first date: no dating so no 79. Broken someone’s heart: not that I know of 80. Had you heart broken: nope 81. Been arrested: no 82. Cried when someone died: yes ofc 83. Fallen for a friend: no

Do you believe in: 84. Yourself: I try to!!! 85. Miracles: yep 86. Love at first sight: ehhh probably not 87. Santa Claus: no :’( 88. Kiss on the first date: I mean, yeah, people can and do do this

Other: 90. Current best friend name: I have like 3 best friends leave me alone 91. Eye colour: blue/grey BUT I have some goldeny brown in one eye wooo 92. Favourite movie: GIFTED 💛  Chris Evans and McKenna Grace are my favourite people and I sobbed like a baby for most of the film

[zahranamazi]

I was tagged by @jakemckenzie i literally have no friends yet

questions under cut

THE LAST:

1. Drink: water

2. Phone call: I'm literally face timing @jakemckenzie as I'm typing and she called me ugly. little does she know

3. Text message: also @jakemckenzie lmao asking her to keep my streaks on snapchat

4. Song you listened to: it was an arabic song, if you must know it’s called Enty and it’s lit

5. Time you cried: after I bought Sean’s idol and saw how he died. no shame. Sean is my babe

HAVE YOU:

6. Dated someone twice: nop

7. Kissed someone and regretted it: never kissed

8. Been cheated on: nope

9. Lost someone special: yes

10. Been depressed: honey

11. Gotten drunk and thrown up: nope

LIST 3 FAVORITE COLORS:

12. olive green 13. gold 14. maroon bitch

IN THE LAST YEAR HAVE YOU:

15. Made new friends: yep

17. Laughed until you cried: yep

18. Found out someone was talking about you: oh yes

19. Met someone who changed you: yes

20. Found out who your friends are: what

21. Kissed someone on your Facebook list: i don’t have facebook

GENERAL:

22. How many of your Facebook friends do you know in real life: see above

23. Do you have any pets: 2 cats

24. Do you want to change your name: not really

25. What did you do for your last Birthday: literally nothing

26. What time did you wake up: 7 bc 

27. What were you doing at midnight last night: tryna get my ass to sleep bc I play sports and you don’t wanna faint

28. Name something you can’t wait for: probably my dad & brother coming back to America

29. When was the last time you saw your mom: five min ago 

30. What is one thing you wish you could change in your life: where I live. really bad

31. What are you listening right now: @jakemckenzie typing endless summer fanfic

32. Have you ever talked to a person named Tom: no df

33. Something that is getting on your nerves: every form of oppression

34. Most visited Website: tumblr :)

35. Mole/s: nop

36. Mark/s: I have cats what do u think

37. Childhood dream: being an artist tbh

38. Hair color: brown like poop

39. Long or short hair: short

40. Do you have a crush on someone: I guess

41. What do you like about yourself: excuse me

42. Piercings: earrings

43. Blood type: B probably

44. Nickname: no

45. Status: single

46. Zodiac: Virgo

47. Pronouns: She/They

48. Favorite TV Show/s: too many

49. Tattoos: no

50. Right or left hand: both

51. Surgery: no

52. Hair dyed in different color: I put henna on my hair a lot but I've gotten highlights once. never again

53. Sport: tennis, basketball

55. Vacation: everywhere, and anywhere just away from where I am

56. Pair of trainers: tennis shoes w/ a toucan on them. they’re cuter than they sound

MORE GENERAL:

57. Eating: are you asking if I eat

58. Drinking: you die without water

59. I’m about to: take my final exam for one of my classes 

61. Waiting for: death

62. Want: everyone to be quiet 

63. Get married: maybe

64. Career: civil rights attorney

65. Hugs or kisses: hold me tight before you go

66. Lips or eyes: eyes

67. Shorter or taller: taller

68. Older or younger: older

70. Nice arms or nice stomach: if u have nice arms you have a nice stomach how do u not

71. Sensitive or loud: idc

72. Hook up or relationship: relationship

73. Troublemaker or hesitant: idc

HAVE YOU EVER:

74. Kissed a stranger: nope

75. Drank hard liquor: nope

76. Lost glasses/contact lenses: too many times

77. Turned someone down: oh yes

78. Sex in the first date: nope ya girl’s a muslim

79. Broken someone’s heart: probably

80. Had your heart broken: not yet

81. Been arrested: nope

82. Cried when someone died: ya

83. Fallen for a friend: no

DO YOU BELIEVE IN:

84. Yourself: what

85. Miracles: yea, 

86. Love at first sight: no

87. Santa Claus: no

88. Kiss on the first date: probably not

89. Angels: yes

OTHER:

90. Current best friend’s name: ugly. jk it’s jay @jakemckenzie bitch ass

91. Eyecolor: green 

92. Favorite movie: idk, heathers probably, Lucy, that movie is weird as fuck but man it makes you question your existence 

I have no idea who has done it or not and it seems like a bunch of people have done it but if you haven’t and want to just say I tagged you whateVer 

[jess-rewatches-prodigalson]

Alma Mater (S2, E3)

My time-stamped thoughts for this episode. As always I reference Malcolm’s mental health. A lot. So if that’s going to be a trigger for you, don’t keep reading. 

SPOILERS AHEAD:

0:20 - There’s no way Martin is actually going to escape Claremont until AT LEAST the season finale.

0:55 - Anyone else annoyed that Ainsley isn’t in Martin’s fantasy? I mean - it’s completely in character but it still pisses me off. 

1:49 - I’m sorry - what? How will pouring Malcolm a drink help this fictional situation?

2:00 - Malcolm ruining Martin’s fantasy dream is honestly such a mood. 

2:10 - “That little kill joy.” haha 

2:21 - Malcolm has a stationary bike. Of course he does. But why does he listen to the personal trainer lady (who I assume was a recording programmed on the bike)? Malcolm doesn’t seem like he needs praise or motivation to exercise. He probably does it the way I do - mindlessly as a habit. A habit built from the knowledge that if I skip a morning workout I will feel more unsettled and anxious than usual before lunch....and don’t even get me started on how quickly my depressive thoughts escalate. 

2:24 - ....I’m still convinced/hoping that this is a false memory Martin has planted in Malcolm. I’m all for Malcolm whump and Malcolm trauma...but the thought of Gil, the team, and Jessica finding out that Malcolm committed a crime terrifies me. I don’t want him to go to jail. I don’t want Gil and the team to turn their back on him. I don’t want Jessica to blame herself (more than usual).

2:39 - I love that the “Malcolm pretty much only feeds himself liquorice and lollipops” is still canon this season.

2:42 - OMG. That is not a helpful affirmation. Like maybe for anyone? If you’re traumatized/depressed/anxious “consider the past and you shall know the future” is not comforting or inspiring. It’s the opposite.

2:48 - I’m loving how confidently Malcolm has been shutting down Martin’s manipulation. #soproud

2:52 - Anyone else super upset that Martin is the person with whom Malcolm discusses his mental health the most honestly? 

3:12 - Check out the way Mr. David looks at Martin here. Does Mr. David already know about Endicott? Or is he just like, “Bitch, spit it out so I don’t have to keep guessing your current family drama.”?

3:17 - “Let’s have another session today.” .....Does Martin really think he’s Malcolm’s new therapist? DOES MALCOLM THINK THAT? IS THAT WHY HE ISN’T SEEING GABRIELLE? HAS MARTIN MANIPULATED HIM INTO THINKING THAT HE DOESN’T NEED GABRIELLE?!?

3:22 - hahahaha OMG. Mr.David is so done with Martin’s theatrics.

3:32 - Ok so two things:

Martin’s insight on Malcolm’s mental health/coping mechanisms is disturbingly on point. Almost like he’s an attentive, caring, father (which he isn’t). 

How long was Gil outside Malcolm’s door before he knocked? Do you think he overheard Malcolm’s side of the conversation? I kind of hope he did. But only if it means I get to see Gil asking Malcolm about it.

3:50 - “Put me on speaker.” I’m torn. Part of me is so proud of Malcolm for denying Martin’s need for attention....but part of me is living for a Martin/Gil showdown where they fight over Malcolm in front of Malcolm.

3:54 - Ok. So Gil was a jerk last episode but I forgive him. Gil just showed up at Malcolm’s apartment to tell him about a case instead of calling Malcolm. Gil knew Malcolm would be upset. Gil knew that Malcolm needed to hear this in person. <3 My heart is full. <3 

4:12 - Concerned!Gil is everything. Look at how much he cares about Malcolm and what this case will inevitably bring up for Malcolm. You can almost see how badly Gil doesn’t want Malcolm on this case. 

4:13 - “What if I said I need you?” Damn. Gil knows. He knows that Malcolm desperately doesn’t want to ever disappoint Gil. Gil is Malcolm’s hero and, when Malcolm is thinking straight, he’d do anything for Gil. 

4:17 - <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 Gil looks so sad when he notices Malcolm’s hand shaking. Can a heart simultaneously break and heal? 

4:23 - Oh yeah. Gil definitely wanted Brumback dead for what he did to Malcolm. He doesn’t even try giving Malcolm the “you’re being insensitive” look. 

4:42 - Wow. That school is nicer than my university. 

4:47 - Do you think Gil’s been to the school before? To visit and/or pick up Malcolm? ....I really want to believe he did. Gil looks like he’s leading Malcolm through campus. Gil looks like he’s familiar with the campus. Surely that means he visited Malcolm there. Right?

5:17 - So...was the “office under water” thing officially a prank? It’s brutal. Forget the murder, Brumback would’ve expelled kids for that prank. 

5:27 - I love how Dani looks at Gil for clarification here. She’s like, “Malcolm is upset, ranting, and making no sense. I’m not going to set him off further by asking more questions. But I need to know what the hell he’s going on about.”

5:40 - Soooo is JT texting Dani? Or is Tally? I really hope it’s Tally. I hope Dani’s texts are all reading something along the lines of “He won’t stop pacing and panicking. If he doesn’t calm down I’m going to slap him.”

5:43 - I love the look of disbelief that Gil shoots Dani when her phone goes off. haha

5:52 - hahaha Gil so heard Edrisa the first time. He was just giving her a chance to conform to professional social standards. 

6:03 - hahahaha OMG. Edrisa is a treasure.

6:56 - awww Malcolm, baby. :( This boy has so much trauma. I love it. 

7:07 - I’m assuming Malcolm’s ‘high school’ was grades 10-12 (not 8-12 which is common in the area of Canada where I grew up) so that means Tom Payne is currently being passed off as a 15-16 year old. It kinda works. But ngl - I spent most of this scene thinking “could they not hire a kid because of COVID?” 

7:12 - I’m not actually mad that Tom Payne was allowed to play high school Malcolm though. His performance in this scene is really moving. “Be someone new.” :( <3

7:45 - Sooooo Malcolm changed his name before he was legally an adult. If it’s his legal last name (we see “Bright” on pill bottles in S1 so it’s his legal name now at least) Jessica had to have signed the paperwork. Damn. I wish I was there to see that process regardless of when it became his legal last name.

7:49 - Baby Malcolm looks so comforted by Martin’s acceptance of his new name and new school. It breaks my heart. 

8:00 - Wait. There was a teacher who liked Malcolm at this school? The son a serial killer? AND the teacher recognizes Malcolm 15 years later?!? Nah. I don’t buy it. I love Malcolm but I feel like the teachers would’ve avoided developing any sort of relationship with Malcolm even if they didn’t have a problem with him. 

8:05 - Hold up. This school is so fancy. Are you telling me they don’t have outdoor security cameras? Surely those would’ve told you who the suspects for the desk thing were at least. 

8:15 - awwww poor Malcolm looks shattered here. :( 

8:31 - “Easy. Let’s keep an open mind.”  That is pure Dad!Gil energy and I’m here for it. 

8:39 - Of course. Of course Jessica is involved in the rich school. 

8:51 - I’m on Gil and Malcolm’s side here. Jessica is putting her reputation over Malcolm’s mental health. Shame on her. No no. I will not stand for this - and neither will Gil. Damn. Look at how pissed he is on Malcolm’s behalf. <3 So sweet. 

9:06 - “Pop-pop’s aquatic center”!?!? Soooo is Pop-pop Jessica’s grandfather or Malcolm’s? Either way give me more information about the extended family. Are they dead? Did they disown them after the Surgeon business? I WANT ANSWERS FEDAK. 

9:15 - I swear. Malcolm is the best son/brother ever. The sacrifices he makes for his Mom/sister are unreal. Also - how much do you want to bet that Malcolm was thinking about the Endicott murder coming out when Jessica said, “how soon until they connect that back to me?”. Malcolm looks so sad here. 

9:23 - Nah. I don’t like Delaney. Even on the first watch I was put off by him. Something about him just creeps me out. He’s showing a weird amount of affection for Malcolm 15 years after Malcolm finished school. IDK maybe I was just upset that someone was trying to mimic Gil’s relationship with Malcolm? 

9:27 - oooooooohhhhh Mom and Dad are fighting. hahaha Malcolm looks so uncomfortable. Gil looks livid. Is Gil pissed because Jessica dumped him or because she totally just neglected Malcolm’s well-being for her own? Probably both. Either way, it’s endlessly entertaining. 

9:53 - I’m on Gil’s side here. She dumped him (like a f**ing moron) because she “doesn’t want to hurt him” and because she’s “broken” and “cursed”. Yet - she manipulates her way into cases. Making her business Gil’s. Gil should be pissed - she broke his heart. Again. Like he’s literally been choosing to hang out with Malcolm, Jessica’s (let’s face it) broken son, for more than 20 years. Jessica’s crazy if she thinks that she’s going to get Gil killed or hurt just because she’s a Whitly. Malcolm’s technically a Whitly - Gil hasn’t died yet. 

10:15 - “Not usually.” Dang. That was icy.

10:50 - Yo this is one messed up bible study. Take it from someone who has attended many young adult/teenage bible studies. This is crazy. Usually it’s: read the bible for 5-10 minutes as a group, discuss how you interpreted it for 15-20 mins, pray as a group for 5 mins, then like an hour of tea/coffee, cookies, board games, and general chatting about normal stuff like romance, school, and personal drama. 

11:44 - “Poor Tally.” hahaha I’m willing to bet that Tally is texting Dani - not JT. I just can’t imagine a panicking, first-time father, texting his little sister with accurate medical details about his wife’s pre-labour experience. He’s probably way too panicked to remember the medical jargon that is “foley ballon”.

12:00 - I’ve watched this scene about 30 times. I’m in love with it. Tom Payne’s performance is haunting and I’m a sucker for emotional whump. I love how Dani is concerned about Malcolm but respectful enough to pry until he shuts down. I love Malcolm’s little speech about the hand tremor (even though it doesn’t make sense because baby Malcolm’s hand was shaking when Shannon interrogated him - but that’s a whole different can of worms I’m not going to rant about).

 12:39 - Does anyone else think it’s weird that there’s a bolt on the closet door? Why isn’t there a lock in the door handle like every other interior school door? I mean, I guess it’s because they can be unlocked from the inside and Nicky would’ve needed a key....but still. The things I forgive for the sake of plot. 

13:25 - Damn. Brumback was a real jerk. “I know what you really are.” Do you know how painful that would be for Malcolm to hear? Regardless of what he almost did to Nicky? Everywhere Malcolm goes people accuse him of being just like his father. Is it surprising that in a moment of weakness, with teenage hormones, Malcolm snapped and said, “Eff it. They think I’m a murderer anyways.”

13:26 - OMG. How bad were the kids at this school?!?! Brumback expelled so many kids. Holy hell. Also - Brumback is wearing a wedding ring. Did he get divorced before he died? Did his wife pass away before him? Why was his family not part of this investigation at all?

13:31 - Brumback writing “Malcolm Whitly” instead of Malcolm Bright is....ouch. I just. My heart breaks for Malcolm.

13:37 - OMG. Traumatized people going through PTSD flashbacks should not be unattended next to a pool of water. Honestly - I thought our boy was going to drown. Which the whumper in me would’ve loved but also I don’t think it was right for the plot on this one. 

14:38 - Martin is such a liar. He definitely thinks he’s God’s gift to the Earth. 

15:02 - Martin knows a lot about the security zones. Something tells me this isn’t the first time he’s contemplated escaping. 

15:04 - Oh shit. Daryl has an imaginary cell mate. I know that’s a serious mental illness and I shouldn’t laugh but OMG. The moment Martin realizes that Daryl is delusional is priceless. hahahaha

15:25 - How much to do want to bet Mr. David has a red key card? Martin’s grin confirms it. 

15:40 - Wow. The classrooms in this high school are really big. I would’ve thought this fancy private school would have smaller class sizes.

15:49 - YES. OMG. Malcolm walking into that classroom soaking wet is golden. *chef’s kiss* Look at Gil’s face - it’s a mixture of concern and disbelief. He’s soooo worried about Malcolm right now. <3 

16:07 - It’s a good thing Malcolm’s rich because that phone is never going to be useful again. 

16:20 - ahhahahaha OMG. WTF. Gil’s little twinkle-finger wave is hilarious. 

16:38 - This whole scene Gil is just staring at Malcolm with so much concern. It warms my cold, dead heart. <3

16:46 - Do you think Malcolm looked for his name in the book? Is it the same book? Do you think Brumback expelled enough kids that this is a new black book?

17:08 - Ok. So I immediately don’t like Louisa. That level of confidence and self-absorption is very unattractive. 

17:25 - Louisa volunteers in the library. That’s how she got access to the poison. 

17:35 - “Dude. You’re dripping.” “Yeah. Water does that.” Can Malcolm be this sassy every episode?!? I’m living for it. 

17:57 - “Boys right? Oof” haha I love Malcolm talking to teenagers. I want it in every episode. ALSO - the jock’s story about the two girls - I’m sorry, but I just don’t see how that an expulsion level offence unless the kid is leaving something out of the story. 

18:31 - Of course they talked about this before they came there. DELANEY WARNED THEM. But mostly to keep his little cheating ring hush hush. 

18:55 - And just like that we’ve been blessed with Malcolm in casual clothes. Wish I could’ve seen Gil question Malcolm’s swim though. 

19:26 - OMG. Edrisa is such a cute little nerd. <3 Protect her at all costs. 

20:00 - Gil and Jessica arguing is amazing. I’m loving it and hating it. Because I want them to live happily ever after in a fairytale world but I do enjoy the drama. 

20:06 - hahaha look at how Jessica just pushes Gil to the side and plows on to Malcolm. This woman is fierce.

20:11 - Yes. Yes Malcolm. Tell Mom she has unrealistic and insensitive expectations of you.

 20:18 - What kind of school is this?!? The board of trustee members are buddy buddy with the students?!? 

20:22 - “They’re all from impeccable families.” “So was I” Mic drop. Watch Malcolm drop the truth bombs. This is maybe the best line in this episode. 

20:30 - “And just like you - none of them is capable of murder.” .....well this sentence is going to come back and bite Jessica in the butt later this season. 

20:44 - The fact that these kids think Edrisa is a freshman is actually hilarious to me. 

20:50 - OMG. “Welcome to boarding school. Bitch.” I was ready for Louisa to die right here. She just punched Edrisa and then called her a bitch. No no no. Edrisa is a quirky treasure and we must protect her. 

21:00 - Damn. I wish we got to see the team’s reaction when they found out one of their teenage suspects assaulted their favourite M.E.

21:10 - Why is it soooo attractive when Malcolm wears casual shirts under a suit jacket? 

21:53 - “My vote is for Louisa. The girl’s got a heavy fist.” hahaha I love Edrisa. SO SO much. 

22:05 - Soooo is Jessica some sort of consultant now? They used her to interview cult extractors and now rich, teenage murder suspect. Is she the “rich person investigator” now?

22:11 - Does Louisa know that Malcolm is Jessica’s son?

23:04 - Louisa is a bad liar. 

24:15 - Delaney should be ashamed. He told Nicky who Malcolm’s dad was. He is the reason that Malcolm got locked in a closet for 3 days. He is the reason Malcolm is claustrophobic. This man should have his teaching license seized and be charged with child abuse. What he did was absolutely despicable. 

24:35 - “My mom’s sending a car.” It’s nice that Malcolm doesn’t always refer to Jessica as “mother”

25:00 - This is heartbreaking. I hope Nicky got expelled. If he didn’t - Malcolm experience a bigger injustice than we were lead to believe. Look at Nicky walking away from Malcolm. That kid has no remorse. I don’t blame Malcolm for seeking revenge. Malcolm keeps getting burned by people. Something had to give eventually.

25:30 - The biggest crime this episode committed is that we only saw Malcolm getting comfort from DELANEY. Honestly. Where was my papa Gil moment?!? Or a Dani+Malcolm moment?!?

25:51 - I doubt Delaney tried to stand up for Malcolm. He probably encouraged the expulsion. 

26:05 - “Please.” Yikes. This has been torturing Malcolm for years. Who sold him out? Who ruined his last chance at a happy childhood? Who allowed him to be traumatized further? Who gave him the hand tremor (assuming we’re ignoring the S1 canon). 

26:38 - What. A. Getaway. This school is full of crazy rich kids.

26:55 - “This time”?!? Doesn’t Martin always root for the killer?

27:05 - I love everything about this interaction between Martin and Malcolm. I love how upset Malcolm is. I love how Malcolm calls out Martin for being a bad dad. I love that Martin just sits there and takes it. Martin even looks a little sad. It makes me wonder - did Martin know about Delaney’s cheating ring? Did Martin manipulate Delaney into thinking Malcolm was a threat and convince him to get Malcolm expelled? I can see Martin doing it. If for no other reason than to tarnish the “Milton legacy” at Remington. 

28:04 - UGH. I want to see how Malcolm got out of that closet SO BAD. Who found him? How close to death was he? PLEASE TELL ME IT WAS GIL. Why didn’t Jessica investigate when Malcolm didn’t show up at the Hamptons as planned? 

28:13 - “How you wish that were true.” Ouch. Martin is a real asshole. He knows just how to destabilize Malcolm’s confidence. 

28:56 - Even now, Martin is trying to manipulate Malcolm. Their relationship is so dysfunctional, beautiful, heartbreaking, and complex. I could watch them interact forever. 

29:31 - Look at that little head shake from Mr. David. Martin’s cell is not soundproof. Mr. David heard everything. Mr. David always hears everything. Mr. David knows about Endicott. Istg. 

30:12 - Delaney is a scumbag. He might not be a serial killer but he’s another male, adult asshole who gained Malcolm’s trust and then stabbed him in the back. 

30:37 - OK. So I know, I’ve been hypothesizing that Mr. David is an ally to Martin’s crazy schemes, or that he worked for Endicott, or that Martin is going to try to kill Mr. David. BUT YO. IF MR. DAVID DIES I WILL THROW HANDS. HE’S SUCH A GREAT CHARACTER. 

31:40 - This is a weirdly fancy room for video games. Also I miss JT. He should be here. I wish he was here. He would’ve been so good in this episode. Can you imagine his facial expressions and comments when he finds out little tidbits about Malcolm’s teenage past?! It would’ve been comedic GOLD. Couldn’t Tally give birth during a less interesting episode?!?! 

32:15 - I’m convinced that Malcolm isn’t actually upset that Delaney’s crime is running the cheating ring. I think Malcolm’s upset because he just realized the only positive male role model (aside from Gil) that he had as a teenager was a manipulative liar who betrayed him. Malcolm just realized that this dude never cared about him and he’s crushed.

32:27 - Wait. Does Delaney make the kids pay him for the answers? Because that actually makes sense. 

33:08 - This whole scene where Molly runs out of the back room and Dani says, “who are you running from?” is really cringey to me. 

33:19 - Oh great. Now the guy who betrayed Malcolm is touching the back of Malcolm’s neck. JUST LIKE GIL DOES. Well....something tells me that’s going to taint how comforting Malcolm find’s that gesture coming from Gil for a while. Malcolm just isn’t allowed to be happy. Even for a moment. It’s a shame. I also love it. 

33:40 - Awww...poor Malcolm is claustrophobic and he gets locked in the vault with a dying man. Look how desperate he is to get out of there - to save Delaney and to save himself more mental distress. 

33:53 - Look at Malcolm panicking here. He tries to hide his panic as concern for Delaney but he’s clearly freaking out about being trapped in a smallish space. 

34:25 - Yep. Malcolm didn’t think he could trust Daryl because Daryl is delusional. SO Martin threatens to murder Daryl and then metaphorically stabs the dude in the back. This is perfectly in character. 

35:25 - Damn. Louisa is seriously mentally ill. She has zero empathy. 

35:57 - Malcolm projecting his mental issues on the killer du jour is always simultaneously cringey and amazing to me. 

36:26 - I’m not going to lie. Daryl screaming “He’s a Judas” as he was dragged away was hilarious. 

37:04 - Holy shit. This took a turn. I’ll be honest - I don’t blame Malcolm for almost killing Nicky. But it does scare me. 

38:35 - That story must have been haunting Malcolm for 15 years. I bet you he’s never told anyone not even Gabrielle. He’s had nightmares about it. Because he knows he’s capable of murder. Just like Martin. That terrifies Malcolm more than anything in the world. 

39:12 - sooooo Delaney just heard that whole confession. Delaney lives. Something tells me this is going to be a problem for Malcolm when Endicott’s murder is investigated later in the season.

39:35 - “Are you insane?” “Maybe.” That’s it. That’s the show. 

40:00 - Two questions: 1) Where is Dani? 2) Why does Gil not know where Malcolm is right now?

40:22 - Look Fedak screwed us over. We didn’t get to see Gil find Malcolm half-dead on the floor of that library vault. BUT this scene almost makes up for it. 

40:24 - Malcolm wrapped in a blanket is so so cute. I just want to hug him. I want Gil to hug him. Ugh. <3 

40:28 - I love that you can tell that Malcolm and Gil have had this sort of discussion about Malcolm’s sense of self-preservation numerous times in the past. Gil looks sooooo pissed. And concerned. 

40:35 - Malcolm’s imitation of Gil makes me so so so so happy. I just. Ugh. It’s adorable. Look at how exasperated it makes Gil. Look at Dani’s reaction to it. This might be the greatest “found family”. scenes this show has given us to date. 

40:55 - “All in a day’s work.” Oh yeah. Gil is super concerned about Malcolm’s mental state. Gil is Worried. I want to see more of it. 

40:57 - I love that Dani just can’t wait anymore. She’s so precious. Look at how excited she is about JT’s baby. <3 I’m in love. She’s so soft here - it’s beautiful and rare for this show to let the audience see this side of Dani. 

41:00 - GIL’S REACTION. <3 OMG. I LOVE HIM. HE LOOKS SO HAPPY. I HOPE JT AND TALLY DUB HIM THE BABY’S UNOFFICIAL GRANDFATHER. 

41:02 - MALCOLM’S FACE. <3 <3 <3 IS THIS THE FIRST TIME HE’S EVER SEEN A BABY? HE’S SO ENAMORED WITH THIS CHILD ALREADY. LOOK AT HOW MUCH MALCOLM ALREADY LOVES JT’S KID. <3 <3 IT’S SO SOFT. I LOVE IT SO SO SO SO MUCH. 

41:22 - I can’t decide about this scene. On one hand - I think it’s really mature of Malcolm to apologize to Martin. It’s a courtesy that Martin doesn’t deserve. ON THE OTHER HAND - I wonder if Malcolm is only apologizing to throw Martin off balance. I wonder if this is Malcolm’s attempt to manipulate Martin for once. Either way - I love it. 

42:25 - Martin always gets the last word. He always worms his way into Malcolm’s brain and screws with Malcolm’s sense of self. I hate it. But I also find it so captivating. 

43:05 - Sooooo is Martin committing the murder next episode? Or is he just manipulating someone else to commit a murder? Either way - I’m excited. 

If you read this far - I’m flattered. I also think you’re a little crazy. But thanks for hanging out. 

[droppingthebasssince1997]

Even though its January 14th and new years was 14 days ago i just feel the need to talk about some stuff thats happened. Im not the kind of person to talk about things that happened. I’d rather keep it in and figure it out myself cause i guess I'm just used to it and also its so hard for me to voice out my emotions at some times. I just can never put it into words. 2017 was honestly the hardest year of my life and i know there are people out there who have it way worse but it was pretty shitty. So many things happened. I fell in love with an abusive, angry, self indulged coke head who made me hate myself and made me feel like everything i did in life was stupid. I stopped believing in myself, slacked hella in school, skipped school to basically be his fucking maid. all i did was clean, cook, sleep, drink and repeat this entire cycle. and if he was having a rough day well that just meant that id get yelled at for the tiniest things even if it means us arguing over who could get a can of pop. I guess thats when i stopped caring about everything, my mental health and physical health, my relationship with my family and friends (the 2 friends that i had lol) and my education. I was so lost and confused that I had pretty much given up on everything. I stopped trying to be positive or doing everything with a smile like i usually do. Long story short I had a little slip on june 9th. that was the day when i decided to end everything. fortunately enough i got stopped and long story short i got slapped with a record for trying to call out for help. Instead of saying its okay for wanting everything to stop in life for once, the first thing the psychiatrist told me at 12pm (after being taken in at 4am and being kept there) was that i was slapped with a criminal record. After he said that i guess i just shut down as usual. why the fuck would you consider someone a criminal for trying to kill themselves. Till this day i can't put the pieces together or come up with an idea of why they would do so. yes i had empty blow bags in my wallet and maybe its because i was drinking that night but still it made no sense in my head. It made me feel unimportant and unworthy despite everything that i had just went through. I didn’t talk to anyone for 3 days and funny story even tho i was told to stay away from alcohol my ex and his fam still got drunk and drank around me the entire night. the same night i got out of the hospital. I spent the first night alone because well everyone was partying and I didn't have any good friends to talk to. I lost kalli because i was dating a jerk and i lost kayla well basically because she had a busy life. long story short my parents found out i was lying about doing summer school and i went back to live with them beginning july. i really broke their hearts and my dad didn't talk to me or even look at me for 2 weeks. My dad is a sweetheart and in my 20 years on this planet he has raised his voice at me once and he apologized 30 minutes after. I really hurt them and I guess i waS still to dumb to see how i was still hurting them. i was still with josh the entire summer and i would come home hammered and coked out at 3 in the morning way past my curfew and fight with my parents. it got so bad once to the point where my dad and i got almost got into a physical fight. I was trying to leave the house and he grabbed all my stuff and chucked it. It was a horrible night. that was also the night i came clean to my mom about everything except coke because i don't think i could ever come clean about it. long story short i decided education was what i wanted to do for the rest of my life esp after having a great time during the summer being a summer camp leader. So i went back to kelowna to start year 2 well kinda. I was on probation cause i fucked year 1 up hard. i was still with that jerk but my good friends that i lived with made me realize what he was doing to me. he had me shoved up against car doors and walls while being right up in my face yelling at me. or getting made and pushing me because i accidentally lost cocaine. well i finally got the courage to break up with him for good. It was probably the hardest thing i have ever done. I never thought i could break up with him or get out of that abusive relationship. and sometimes it still hits me that I'm done with his bullshit for good and I'm okay. Im safe and I'm never going back there and he can never ever hurt me again. I guess I'm just scared and so fucking angry at myself for not seeing everything and the larger picture. I called myself a feminist for the longest time and would be like “how can girls stay in abusive relationships?” and now i know how. Being manipulated and controlled is a real thing. You are completely blinded by everything. your sense of power and identity get ripped away from you and your abuser becomes the only thing you have and find comfort in. Its weird and some people might not understand it. But i sure do and i finally realized all the things he had done to me. mentally and emotionally. anyways this is where 2017 got better for me. I started talking to my old friend edwin again. Josh made me ghost him when we got together. we talked everyday. it was like nothing had changed and within 2 days of talking to him i basically told him everything that happened in a year and 7 months. it was a lot tbh and i never actually noticed haha. but he stuck thru everything including my wild drunk nights out. I turned into something else and hoed around. I guess it was my way of dealing with stuff and found comfort in seeing guys? Because i didn't know who i was and my confidence was so used to being dependent on a guy for security and empowerment that i couldn't do it alone. I couldn't empower myself and thats mainly the reason to why i slept around. anyways edwin and i talked 25/7 day and night and we got so close without even realizing it. we gave each other relationship advice as he was seeing a couple girls and so was I. when i came back for reading break he kissed me and thats when i realized he had feelings for me all this while. I was so blinded by all these fuck boys to see he was right under my nose the entire time. and when he was flirting with me he actually was flirting with me and not joking about it. well i made a mistake after but long story short i liked him in an instant. i liked him more than like. i loved him but i knew it was too soon. i was scared to get serious so fast considering its only been a couple months since i broke up with josh. anyways he asked me out and i said yes in a heartbeat. He is not like any other guy and i know it. he’s far from them and he;s never going to hurt me. he didn't even have to say that to reassure me i just know. and I'm dating my best friend like how much better could it get. he helped me get sober and i could be 5 months sober but i had slip up. so its been 2 months fully clean and i couldn't feel anymore cleaner and pure. end of 2017 started to look better for me. I started dating my best friend, got sober, got out of probation, got a job in kelowna and my relationship with my parents got so so so strong. My mom and I haven't been closer and its honestly the best. little did i know we are the same person esp when drunk haha. But then some stuff with my little sister when down and i ratted her to my parents because it was the only way to get her out of that situation. anyways she doesn't talk to me anymore or ever. And i guess I'm so hurt and thats why i decided to write everything out because I'm hurt. I lost my best friend since 2013. yes she is my sister but she is also my best friend. If you ask me who i want as my bridesmaid id say shalini right off the hook. without thinking because when we moved here we had no one but each other. we moved half way across the country and left everything and everyone behind just because I  was failing school in singapore. we got close i guess after only having each other and it just stings a little that she can't trust me cause who do i trust now.I know i have edwin but its different. she’s my sister she just knows me like no body else. we were fobs together and we matured and grew together. i don't have any other girl friends i trust besides her. i don't have a girl best friend and i guess I'm just sad over that. I lost all my girl best friends cause of josh and the others are back home half way across the fucking world and i just don't mean as much as i used to to them. distance and time difference can play a part lol. I really don't know what got to me to talk about everything or at least a couple things but maybe its just cause i finally got my period after 3 months and I'm super emotional and hormonal? sighs anyways i know 2018 is going to be my year and so many things are happening this year its defs gonna be a year to remember. I just wish for my best friend to come back or for me to find a good girlfriend who's on my level and wants to talk to me about her date or texts me while she;s on her date or something or comes over to nap or eat food or netflx or maybe go shopping with idk. i know i already have a friend./ twin sister  like that, hanna, but she’s half way across the country and boy have we distanced. anyways i took like 45 mins typing this out and crying so i think its time to toughen up and get back to reality and life. Im a strong girl who’s been thru a couple things and with that experience of being hurt, used and manipulated I'm gonna make a change and 2018 is going to be waaaay different. I got this, all of it.

[la-princessaa]

92 Questions Tag

I got tagged by @perfecthurt !! Thank u!!! gonna put these under a readmore

THE LAST: 1. Drink: Water

2. Phone call: My.. grandma I think?

3. Text message: Since I don't text my last skype message was to lilac

4. Song you listened to: Silver Spoon (Baepsae, whatever) - BTS

5. Time you cried: Like... Tuesday I think. If not then, then Saturday

HAVE YOU:

6. Dated someone twice: Yeah

7. Kissed someone and regretted it: Technically no bc I haven't had a first kiss yet

8. Been cheated on: At least twice, if not 3 times

9. Lost someone special: Sadly yes

10. Been depressed: LOL.....

11. Gotten drunk and thrown up: No but man I got WICKED stomach cramps once

LIST 3 FAVORITE COLORS:

12-14: Pink, red, navy blue?

IN THE LAST YEAR HAVE YOU:

15. Made new friends: Ye!

16. Fallen out of love: Nope

17. Laughed until you cried: I have indeed

18. Found out someone was talking about you: Nope

19. Met someone who changed you: Nope

20. Found out who your friends are: Oh... ohohohoho... haaaaah... WOO.

21. Kissed someone on your Facebook list: Nope?

GENERAL:

22. How many of your Facebook friends do you know in real life: Moooost of them?

23. Do you have any pets: 2 puppos and a cat

24. Do you want to change your name: I do not!

25. What did you do for your last Birthday: Technically I went to an anime con

26. What time did you wake up: Like 2:40pm

27. What were you doing at midnight last night: Watching bts stuff on youtube,,,

28. Name something you can’t wait for: I have no idea?

29. When was the last time you saw your mom: Like 20 mins ago

30. What is one thing you wish you could change in your life: Honestly I don't know

31. What are you listening right now: Blood, Sweat, and Tears - BTS

32. Have you ever talked to a person named Tom: Ye!!

33. Something that is getting on your nerves: Nothing really?

34. Most visited Website: Probably tumblr? Either that or youtube

LAST QUESTIONS. I JUST PUT IN RANDOM INFO ABOUT ME

35. Mole/s: I have a lot but the one most notable imo is the one on the back of my right handbc it’s like RIGHT in the middle

36. Mark/s: I have a scar on my left hand from picking my cat up by a mirror and accidentally cutting it, uhh.. freckles? I have scars on both my knees from skinning them 6 and 3 years ago

37. Childhood dream: I wanted to be a singer or a doctor

38. Haircolor: My natural hair is brown, but it's dyed rn

39. Long or short hair: Kind of long? It's curly it's hard to judge anymore

40. Do you have a crush on someone: Uh if celebrities count then yes....

41. What do you like about yourself: Idk

42. Piercings: Just normal ear piercings. Debating on getting a lip one though...

43. Bloodtype: Not a damn clue

44. Nickname: Sma/Sna, Sam, Sammy, Samster

45. Relationship status: Single pringle and oh so grateful

46. Zodiac: Cancer

47. Pronouns: she/her

48. Favorite TV Show: Law and Order SVU tbh

49. Tattoos: No tattoos but I want one,,,

50. Right or left hand: Right

51. Surgery: None

52. Hair dyed in different color: It's a darker (like way darker) than my natural brown, it's closer to black

53. Sport: Nothing I'm lazy (though I am trying to learn some dances and I did gymnastics when I was little)

55. Vacation: ?????

56. Pair of trainers: Are trainers just shoes in general...? idk???

MORE GENERAL:

57. Eating: I ate yogurt earlier

58. Drinking: Water. Stay hydrated, kids

59. I’m about to: No idea. Probs surf youtube

61. Waiting for: Tomorrow I guess? Gonna hang with the irl crew

62. Want: To sleep. I'm weirdly tired rn

63. Get married: I'd really like to

64. Career: Honestly I don't know. Wanted to be a therapist but... Dad kinda opened his mouth and.. ruined it

WHICH IS BETTER:

65. Hugs or kisses: Hugs r the best

66. Lips or eyes: Eyes but recently I have been looking at lips more often

67. Shorter or taller: Taller (not hard to be taller than me)

68. Older or younger: Older

70. Nice arms or nice stomach: Don't really matter?

71. Sensitive or loud: Uh..

72. Hook up or relationship: Relationship

73. Troublemaker or hesitant: Probably a troublemaker

HAVE YOU EVER:

74. Kissed a stranger: Nope

75. Drank hard liquor: Probably not

76. Lost glasses/contact lenses: NOPE AND I'M PROUD

77. Turned someone down: Yeah

78. Sex on the first date: I haven't even had a first date but no regardless

79. Broken someone’s heart: Not sure, maybe

80. Had your heart broken: Oooooh yeah

81. Been arrested: Nope

82. Cried when someone died: For like a week straight recently

83. Fallen for a friend: Yeeeeeeeeah.... yeah

DO YOU BELIEVE IN:

84. Yourself: No

85. Miracles: Yeah

86. Love at first sight: Yeah...

87. Santa Claus: Mhm!

88. Kiss in the first date: For me? Not really. Do whatever u want tho

89. Angels: I do

OTHER:

90. Current best friends name: Makaylia

91. Eye color: Dark brown

92. Favorite movie: Howl's Moving Castle honestly

I guess if u read this far then u get to do it now. Sorry I don’t make the rules

[sleepinbird]

do all the "send me a number, yo" asks!!!!!

You got it dude.

Under the cut bc its long!

1: Let’s start with a tricky one; what is the real reason you are confused right now?I’m afriad that im making the wrong long term career decision. 

2: Do you ever get “good morning” texts from anyone?

No, but I wake up right next to her so we say it in person

3: If your significant other smoked pot, would you care?

Nah as long as she’s safe about it.

4: Do you find it easy to trust others?

Depends on the vibe I get from them.

5: What were you doing at 11PM last night?

Playing BOTW

6: You’re drunk and lost walking down the road; who is with you?

Hopefully my partner

7: What would you do if you found out you had been cheated on?

I dont even know. I would be so crushed and angry. 

8: Are you close with your dad?

Nope

9: I bet you kissed someone last night, right?

Yep! My girl.

10: What are you listening to?

My partner tapping her foot to music

11: You can only drink ONE liquid for the rest of your life - what is it?

Blue gatorade

12: Do you like hickeys?

Love ‘em

13: What time do you go to bed?

Between 1 and 3am

14: Is there someone who continuously lets you down?

Nah

15: Can you text as quickly with one hand as you do both?

Nope

16: Do you always answer your texts?

For the most part

17: Do you hate the person you fell the hardest for?

No. She’s the best thing thats ever happened to me.

18: When was the last time you talked to one of your best friends?

20 ish mins ago

19: Is there someone that makes you happy every time you see them?

Ye, my girl

20: What was your last thought before you went to bed last night?

“God my hip hurts”

21: Is anyone else in the room with you?

Yeah, several. I’m at school.

22: Do you believe what goes around comes around?

I hope it does.

23: Were you happier four months ago than you are now?

No. I was at the beginnings of a depressive episode.

24: Is there someone you wish you could fix things with?

Sorta?

25: In the past week, have you cried?

Yeah.

26: What colour is the shirt you are wearing?

Maroon.

27: Do people ever call you by your last name?

Nope.

28: Is anyone ignoring you right now?

Not as far as I know

29: Do you have a best friend?

Several

30: Would it be hard seeing someone else kiss the last person you kissed?

It’d be devastating considering I’m dating the last person I kissed.

31: Who was your last call/text message from?

Both from my Mom

32: Are you mad at anyone?

I’ll always be lowkey mad at my dad.

33: Have you ever kissed someone older than you?

Yes, once

34: How old will the last person you kissed be on his/her next birthday?

23

35: How many more days until your birthday?

87

36: Do you have any summer plans yet?

Work

37: Do you have any good friends of the opposite sex?

Ye.

38: Are you keeping anything from your best friend(s) now?

Nope

39: Do you have a secret that you’ve never told anyone?

I dont think so

40: Have you ever regretted kissing someone?

Lowkey, but not really.

41: Do you think age matters in relationships?

To an extent, yeah.

42: Are you available?

Nope!

43: How many people have you had real, strong feelings for since high school ended?

Since it ended? One. And Im with her now.

44: If you had to get a piercing (not ears), what would you get?

Probably a second lip piercing. Maybe tongue.

45: Do you believe exes can be friends?

Depends on the circumstances but yes.

46: Do you regret anything?

Yeah but not so much that I would want to go back and change it

47: Honestly, what’s on your mind right now?

My health

48: Did you ever lose a best friend?

I feel like I sorta half lost one. We still chat, but its not like it used to be and its probably my fault.

49: Was your last kiss a mistake?

Not at all.

50: Why aren’t you pursuing the person you like?

I already did and it was a success. : )

51: Has the last person you kissed ever seen you cry?

Several times

52: Do you still talk with the person you LAST kissed?

Every day

53: What was the last thing you ate?

Apple slice

54: Did you get any compliments today?

Not yet

55: Where are you going on your next vacation?

God I have no idea. Maybe Idaho Springs?

56: Do you own anything from other countries?

I mean most things are made in China so???

57: Are most of your friend guys or girls?

Most of them are outside the binary, but lean towards female.

58: Where have you lived most of your life?

Colorado

59: When was the last time you took a long drive?

Can’t remember

60: Have you ever played Spin the Bottle?

Nope

61: Have you ever TPd someone’s house?

Nope

62: Who do you text the most?

Either my Mom or my partner.

63: What was the last movie you saw?

Would You Rather

64: What’s preventing your current boyfriend/girlfriend from going back to their ex?

Idk, they love me I guess?

65: How many boyfriends/girlfriends did you have in 2011?

None.

66: Is the last person you kissed younger than you?

Yeah by like a year ish.

67: Do you curse around your parents?

I try not to

68: Are you happy with where you live?

Decently so. Its messier than I’d like, but 4 college students live there, so what can you do?

69: Picture of yourself?

Will post separately.

70: Are you a monogamous person or do you believe in open-ended relationships?

I prefer monogamy because I’m easily jealous, but under very certain circumstances, I’d be willing to try polyamory.

71: Have you ever been dumped?

Nah. 

72: What do you most like about making out?

Tongue ;P

73: Have you ever casually made out with someone who you weren’t seriously involved with?

Kissed, yes. Made out, no.

74: When you kiss someone for the first time, is it usually you who initiates it or the other?

I’ve only done it once, and I initiated.

75: What part of a person’s body do you find most attractive?

The crease where thigh meets butt, hands, neck, legs lol

76: Who was the last person you talked to last night before you went to bed?

My partner

77: Had sex with someone you knew less than an hour?

Nope

78: Had sex with someone you didn’t know their name?

Nope

79: What makes your heart flutter and brings a big cheesy smile to your face?

When I wake up to her smiling at me

80: Would you get involved with someone if they had a child already?

Depends on the age of said child

81: Has someone who had a crush on you ever confessed to you?

My current partner, yeah.

82: Do you tell a lot of people when you have a crush?

Nah, only like one person

83: Do you miss your last sweetie?

I always miss her 

84: Last time you slow danced with someone?

Probably about a month ago in our living room

85: Have you ever ‘dated’ someone you’ve never met?

Nope

86: How can I win your heart?

Someone already has it. But personality is everything.

87: What is your astrological sign?

Libra

88: What were you doing last night at 12 AM?

Getting ready for bed

89: Do you cook?

Not as much as Id like

90: Have you ever gotten back in touch with an old flame after a time of more than 3 months of no communication?

Not really an old flame, but an old friend yeah

91: If you’re single right now, do you wish you were in a relationship?

Not single

92: Do you prefer to date various people or do you pretty much fall into monogamous relationships quickly?

Monogamy

93: What physical traits do you look for in a potential interest?

Physical traits dont really matter. Its more a personality thing for me

94: Name four things that you wish you had!

A dick, the willpower to lose weight, a higher wage, another iced coffee

95: Are you a player?

Not really.

96: Have you ever kissed 2 people in one day?

I dont think so

97: Are you a tease?

Yeah, but only with her

98: Ever meet anyone you met on Tumblr?

I think so. Probably at a con

99: Have you ever been deeply in love with someone?

Currently am

100: Anybody on Tumblr that you’d go on a date with?

Only the gal Im currently dating

101: Hugs or Kisses?

Hugs

102: Are you too shy to ask someone out?

Most of the time yeah lol

103: The first thing you notice about the opposite sex?

Idk, voice? Smile?

104: Is it cute when a boy/girl calls you babe?

Ye

105: If a sexy person was pursuing you, but you knew he/she was in relationship, would you go for it?

NOOOOOOOOO

106: Do you flirt a lot?

Kinda lol

107: Your last kiss?

My gal

108: Have you kissed more than 5 people since the start of 2012?

Nope

109: Have you kissed anyone in the past month?

Ye

110: If you could kiss anyone who would it be?

The girl to my left

111: Do you know who you’ll kiss next?

Absolutely

112: Does someone like you currently?

I hope so!

113: Do you currently have feelings for anyone?

Yes indeed

114: Do you like to be in serious relationships or just flings?

Serious only. I dont see the point in a fling.

115: Ever made out with just a friend?

Made out, no, kissed, ye.

116: Are you happier single or in a relationship

It depends. Id say Im happier with her than I have been in a great long while.?

[mimiceon]

answer all of them

When I said I would block you,,,, There’s a lot more than one way to get blocked. Anyway, I’m putting this under a read more bc I hate you and it’s long. If you want to know more about me than strictly necessary then click read more, rip in pieces to those on mobile.

Also: I W I N

200: My crush’s name is:No one,,, or is it (lol it’s no one)199: I was born in: Ireland, 1998198: I am really: Annoying, probably197: My cellphone company is: 3 mobile196: My eye color is: Blue195: My shoe size is: 5194: My ring size is: IDK?? I have my Cladddagh ring but I don’t remember193: My height is: 5′‘2192: I am allergic to: nothing191: My 1st car was: I can’t drive190: My 1st job was: babysitter189: Last book you read: Foster (it’s shit)188: My bed is: A double bed?? really comfy?? I have no parameters here187: My pet: I don’t have one186: My best friend: Emma, a certified Dork185: My favorite shampoo is: Elvive, it has glitter184: Xbox or ps3: Xbox183: Piggy banks are: Cool??182: In my pockets: I’m in pajamas181: On my calendar: nothing all week save Graduation on Thursday180: Marriage is: Coolio 179: Spongebob can: be happy, levae him be178: My mom: is coolio177: The last three songs I bought were? Decpacito, Issues, and Horns176: Last YouTube video watched: Vine compilations, sue me175: How many cousins do you have? Too Many, family reunions are wild174: Do you have any siblings? 4 bothers and one sister173: Are your parents divorced? Yes172: Are you taller than your mom? Yes171: Do you play an instrument? *Flashbacks to recorder practice* It’s required in Ireland so yeah170: What did you do yesterday? Went shopping and bought my graduation outfit[ I Believe In ]169: Love at first sight: yes (I’m a mushy person don’t drag me)168: Luck: yes, Luck of The Irish, I’ve never had it, but it’s there167: Fate: Yes, it’s fate I’m gonna kick ur ass166: Yourself: N O165: Aliens: yes, I wanna fuck superman, I have to believe164: Heaven: ??163: Hell:???162: God:?????161: Horoscopes: yeah I’m a Leo (August 19th, mark your calender)160: Soul mates: Yes 159: Ghosts: Fuck yeah, my firends house is haunted158: Gay Marriage: I’m a bisexual,,,, so Y E S157: War: No (?)156: Orbs: *flashbacks to fanfics* … don’t…155: Magic: Y E S[ This or That ]  (I’m bisexual,,,,, why u asking me to choose) 154: Hugs or Kisses: Kisses!153: Drunk or High: Drunk152: Phone or Online: Online151: Red heads or Black haired: Black hair 150: Blondes or Brunettes: blondes149: Hot or cold: Cold148: Summer or winter: Winter147: Autumn or Spring: Autumn146: Chocolate or vanilla: Chocolate145: Night or Day: Night144: Oranges or Apples: Apples143: Curly or Straight hair: Straight142: McDonald’s or Burger King: McDonald’s141: White Chocolate or Milk Chocolate: Milk Chocolate140: Mac or PC: PC139: Flip flops or high heels: High Heels138: Ugly and rich OR sweet and poor: Sweet and poor137: Coke or Pepsi: Coke136: Hillary or Obama: Obama135: Burried or cremated: Buried, I’m taking part in the skeleton war134: Singing or Dancing: Singing133: Coach or Chanel: Coach132: Kat McPhee or Taylor Hicks: Who (???)131: Small town or Big city: big city130: Wal-Mart or Target: I’m Irish129: Ben Stiller or Adam Sandler: Ben Stiller128: Manicure or Pedicure: Manicure127: East Coast or West Coast:I’m Irish126: Your Birthday or Christmas: Christmas125: Chocolate or Flowers: Cocolate124: Disney or Six Flags: Disney (tf is six flags??)123: Yankees or Red Sox: I’m Irish[ Here’s What I Think About ]122: War: My brothers are all in the army, this is v Yikes121: George Bush: Did 9/11120: Gay Marriage: Let us marry!!119: The presidential election: Stupid118: Abortion: Let them have it, it’s not my decision117: MySpace: Oldie but goodie116: Reality TV: Stupid, but entertaining115: Parents: Love my step dad, I’m a daddy’s girl lmao114: Back stabbers: [eye emojis]113: Ebay: Don’t use it much112: Facebook: Good, I guess111: Work: I’m a lazy binch110: My Neighbors: Nosy!! They look in our windows when we’re out109: Gas Prices: I don’t drive108: Designer Clothes: Look fancy107: College: I plan on going to one106: Sports: Quidditch I love, not so sure on everything else105: My family: OK, a little nasty sometimes, v petty, esp my brothers104: The future: The what???[ Last time I ]103: Hugged someone: Like this morning?102: Last time you ate: I’m eating an apple rn101: Saw someone I haven’t seen in awhile: Last week I saw my aunt100: Cried in front of someone: Last Thursday 99: Went to a movie theater: Lke a week ago98: Took a vacation: way too long ago97: Swam in a pool: Years96: Changed a diaper: Not long enough ago95: Got my nails done: Ages ago94: Went to a wedding: Last year93: Broke a bone: 5 years ago (my school shaded me, another story for another time)92: Got a peircing: 3 years ago91: Broke the law: I downloaded music illegally yesterday90: Texted: yesterday[ MISC ]89: Who makes you laugh the most: My friend Molly88: Something I will really miss when I leave home is: My Coffee machine87: The last movie I saw: Gaurdians Of The Galaxy Vol. 2 (I was forced)86: The thing that I’m looking forward to the most: The end of my exams85: The thing im not looking forward to: My exams84: People call me: Abbey, Abbs, Dabbey Hufflepuff (100% real)83: The most difficult thing to do is: Study82: I have gotten a speeding ticket: I don’t drive81: My zodiac sign is: Leo80: The first person i talked to today was: My mum79: First time you had a crush: I was like 8, he was my brothers best friend, he gave me a valentines card and I told him to go away bc I couldn’t handle it78: The one person who i can’t hide things from: My mum77: Last time someone said something you were thinking: Idk??76: Right now I am talking to: The GC75: What are you going to do when you grow up: something stupid, probably74: I have/will get a job: IDK??73: Tomorrow: School72: Today: Study71: Next Summer: Exams, then England for a while70: Next Weekend: Dying slowly, from a hangover69: I have these pets: None68: The worst sound in the world: ‘moist’67: The person that makes me cry the most is: Myself binch66: People that make you happy:my mutuals (yes even u you shitstain)65: Last time I cried: last Thursday64: My friends are: a little mean, v condescending63: My computer is: HP62: My School: Is becoming a gaelscoil and I can’t deal lmao61: My Car: I don’t have one60: I lose all respect for people who: Shout at me/fake ask ppl out59: The movie I cried at was: Lion King, Marley and Me58: Your hair color is: Brown with some blonde57: TV shows you watch: Shadowhunters, Avatar, Legend of Korra + many more56: Favorite web site: This blue hell, or youtube55: Your dream vacation: America54: The worst pain I was ever in was: When I broke my arm, that shit hurt53: How do you like your steak cooked: Well Done52: My room is: Messy, kind of51: My favorite celebrity is: I can’t choose don’t do me dirt like this50: Where would you like to be: America!49: Do you want children: IDK48: Ever been in love: Hah nooooo47: Who’s your best friend: Emma46: More guy friends or girl friends: Girl friends45: One thing that makes you feel great is: Sleeping44: One person that you wish you could see right now: My niece, Ella43: Do you have a 5 year plan: No, I don’t even know what I’m doing in 5 mins42: Have you made a list of things to do before you die: No41: Have you pre-named your children: No40: Last person I got mad at: Myself, my friend Mia 39: I would like to move to: America38: I wish I was a professional: Sleeper[ My Favorites ]37: Candy: Chocolate36: Vehicle: IDK35: President: Mary, she was good34: State visited: i’M iRISH33: Cellphone provider: 332: Athlete: N O31: Actor: NO30: Actress:also no29: Singer: again no28: Band: I HAVE NO TALENTS OKAY27: Clothing store: Penneys26: Grocery store: Tesco25: TV show: Shadowhunters24: Movie: I don’t have a fave, don’t do me dirt23: Website: This blue hell, or youtube22: Animal: A Sugar Glider21: Theme park: ???20: Holiday: I’d like to go to America19: Sport to watch: Quidditch18: Sport to play: none lol17: Magazine: none16: Book: Harry Potter15: Day of the week: Saturday14: Beach: Loch Luch13: Concert attended: none12: Thing to cook: Pasta Bake11: Food: Curry10: Restaurant: Blue Ocean9: Radio station: Today FM8: Yankee candle scent: Lavender7: Perfume: Princess- Vera Wang6: Flower: Violet5: Color: Purple4: Talk show host:Ryan Tubridy3: Comedian: Darragh O’Brien2: Dog breed: A Newfie!! We used to breed Newfoundlands!!1: Did you answer all these truthfully?  Yes (kind of)