#my brain is not working properly at this time

[tseecka]

I peel oranges neatly. The sections come apart cleanly, perfectly in my hands.

***

One day, Ximena buys Jayce a crate of oranges.

She hands it to him one Sunday morning; he still visits every Sunday, makes time early in the morning before the sun has even risen to find his way to the meagre Talis estate and let himself through the front gate and into her warm kitchen, where spiced chocolate is always steaming and waiting for him. She asks him about his work; she asks him about the Council, and about Hextech, and about the forge, and about Viktor and Heimerdinger and the Academy.

He asks her about her garden, and helps her remove and clean and oil the joints of her digital prostheses.

She tuts over a new burn or scrape on his hands--which have never been cared for properly, the skin red and inflamed around the site, a mild infection setting in. She finds the antiseptic and the gauze, withdrawn from the first aid kid mounted next to the kitchen sink, and does her best to clean it, and he indulges her. She is, after all, his mother. He hasn't needed her in a long time, but this is something he can do for her, let her mother him, and it's nice to sit in his childhood home with her fussing over his hand while the mug of chocolate warms his palm, a pleasant soothe against the sharp sting of disinfectant.

This is their weekly morning ritual; it does not typically involve oranges.

(Remaining fic under the cut, or you can read it on Archive of Our Own!)

"I know for a fact," she tells him mildly, digging out a sharp splinter of metal that got lodged at the base of his thumb two nights ago, "that you and that Viktor of yours don't eat nearly enough."

"Ma..." Jayce sighs, shaking his head. His tone is long-suffering, teasingly weary; but he can't say anything more than that, because she is unfortunately, right. There is an icebox in their lab, just a small one, installed in the corner next to the futon he liberated from his old bedroom. It's not wise to argue with Ximena Talis.

She clicks her tongue at him, and the sliver comes out, captured neatly between the precision points of her prostheses--more effective than tweezers. He winces, flexes his hand, and a drop of blood beads on his skin. He'd honestly figured it would work itself out, but she'd spotted it immediately.

"You're so busy, Jayce, I understand this; but you must eat, if only to give that brain of yours the nourishment it needs, hm? Coffee is not enough."

"Okay--but oranges?"

She tears open a small foil packet, withdrawing an antiseptic wipe from inside--a folded piece of damp towel, soaked with solution. She swipes it over the pinprick wound, wiping away the blood. "Your father always kept a crate in the forge," she says, her voice soft and fond. "He was like you--or you are like him. Always working, always moving, never a moment to stop and care for himself. But he liked oranges. The juice for his thirst, the pulp for his stomach, and the sugar for his energy. Convenient; clean." The towelette is set aside. She plucks a small square bandage out of the first aid kit, fitting the adhesive to the skin around the wound. The pale fabric stands out against his darker skin. "I used to come and sit in the forge with him while he worked and peel oranges for him." She laughs, "Useless man. For how fine his smithing was, he never could manage to peel them without smashing them to pulp."

Jaye laughs with her. He doesn't remember his father very well, but the recollection of a toddler brings to mind an enormous bear of a man, with strong, large hands. Maybe larger than they would have been in reality, memory unable to adjust to the passing of time, still remembering a palm and fingers broad enough to encompass the top of his head. It's easy to imagine hands as massive as that trying, and failing, in the delicate operation of removing a peel without damanging the fruit inside.

"Anyways," Ximena continues, folding both her hands over Jayce's one and smiling at him. Crow's feet wrinkle at the corners of her eyes; deep lines form from her nose to the corners of her mouth, etched by the years. "They were on sale. Take them with you and keep them in your lab. Then I will worry less, hm?"

"All right," Jayce agrees, laying his other hand on top of hers and squeezing gently. She is his mother; far be it from him to reject this expression of her love. At worst, they will turn green and fuzzy and end up in next week's trash. At best--a juicy segment of orange now and again does sound nice, against the dry acrid metallic taste of the lab's stagnant air. The bid for time doesn't go unnoticed, though, and he lingers a little longer with his mother today, seeing the gift as emblematic of her maternal worry, and doing what he can to assuage it.

She seems less sad when he leaves, the crate of oranges cradled in his arms. It is early enough still that he thinks he will reach the lab before Viktor does (unless his partner has stayed working through the night; he does that, sometimes, but if that's the case, Jayce was never going to beat him there). The aroma of citrus oil wafts into his nose the entire way to the Academy.

***

Of course they don't have fresh citrus in the Undercity.

It's not like Viktor doesn't know what they are, when he arrives at the lab later that morning (Jayce is pleased at the hour; it means Viktor likely got some real sleep the night before, and even if it was just because he was too exhausted from too many sleepness nights to fight it back any longer--a win is a win). His eyes land on the crate as he hooks his stool with his cane, pulling it over to him; he pauses, as it caught off guard.

"What...are those?"

"...Oranges?"

VIktor sighs impatiently, waving a hand at Jayce as though he's swatting at an insect nuisance. "Yes, I know what oranges are, Jayce. Why are they here?"

"Oh! My mother--a gift. She thought having some fresh fruit in the lab might encourage us to eat better."

Viktor's face shifts into a thoughtful moue, lips pulling down and eyebrows lifting as he considers, shrugs. He settles into his stool and sets the cane aside, leaning against the worktop. Jayce resists needling, asking if Viktor has had breakfast. He'll go for the oranges on his own time. It's irrational to think Ximena would somehow know, or sense, if her gift of care had been rejected. The two men settle into their work--Viktor pulling over an opened notebook and setting his pencil to the page, presumably picking up where he left off in navigating the complex mathematical proofs that have been occupying his mind, Jayce sliding his goggles down over his eyes as he turns his attention to soldering together a number of small components that, he hopes, will one day be capable of housing and conducting energy from a Hexstone. They work in a comfortable silence.

It's a couple of hours later, that Jayce--intent on his work, goggles magnifying the connections in the metal in front of him and by extension blocking out everything else in his surroundings--hears a pained hiss, followed by Viktor's huff of frustration. His back complains as he straightens--how did he end up slouched so far over--and he turns to look at Viktor. The magnification restricts his range of vision, and so it is that he sees--in extensive detail--Viktor's fingers digging like claws into the pitted skin of an orange. His index is buried in the fruit to the first knuckle; there is juice spattering the back of his hand. Hurriedly, he pushes the goggles up off of his eyes, and its in time to see the irritated embarrassment before Viktor wips it from his expression.

"...Doing okay there, Viktor?"

"No, Jayce," comes the exasperated reply. "I have citric acid in my nail bed, and this--impossible fruit refuses to come apart for me. And now my notes are covered in orange juice!"

Wordlessly, Jayce holds out a hand for the orange. Viktor drops it into his palm with another irritated eye roll, withdrawing his finger with a wet popping sound. His face twists in disgust, and he shoves his stool away from the workbench, grabbing up his cane so he can cross to where they keep the cleaning rags. Jayce listens to the retreating tapping of his cane as he considers the orange in his hands.

There are pale grooves in the skin, the pitted surface not quite scraped clean of zest, where Viktor clearly had tried to peel it; scratching at the tough exterior with blunted, chewed-off nails, obviously to no avail. He rotates it in his hands, unable to keep the bemused expression from his face as he notes the evidence of all of Viktor's attempts, culminating, finally, in a singular frustrated stab through the peel and into the flesh beneath.

"Viktor," he calls out, as he fits his own index finger into the wound and pulls, gently, teasing the pith away from the segments as the peel comes away, "what did the orange do to you?"

He hears the tapping of the cane as Viktor comes back to the workbench. He pauses next to Jayce's shoulder, watching as Jayce strips the flesh of its rind in large chunks, tugging away reluctant bits of the pith that refuse to come away cleanly. "Nothing," comes the reply. Jayce glances up at his face, then away; there's a faint tinge of pink to his cheeks, as Jayce peels the fruit with ease. "I just--didn't know the trick of it."

Which is how Jayce learns that, indeed, there are no oranges in the Undercity. And Viktor, for all that he lives in Piltover and has advantages he never could have enjoyed at home, is still staunchly loyal to the Undercity; he tends not to indulge in luxuries that are denied his compatriots. So he never had them at home; and never bothered to seek them out up here.

It's not the first time Jayce has unexpectedly run up against Viktor's rigid internal moral code, manifesting in unexpected ways in how he lives his life as a transplant from disadvantage to relative privilege. Privately, he adds this to his own list of grievances, which grows every time he learns some new angle as to how badly Piltover keeps the Undercity ground below its genteel boot.

He finishes peeling the orange for Viktor, setting the fruit on the pile of discarded rind, and shows him how to tease apart the segments so that they separate cleanly in his hands. Points out where the seeds can sometimes live, so that Viktor won't crack his teeth biting down on one. Viktor nods to him, offering a crooked little half smile, and turns back to his work, wiping away the splatters of orange juice on his notebook pages before turning over to a fresh one. Jayce waits, and watches for a moment, but Viktor seems uninterested in pursuing the fruit any further. Still--it's a good reminder to himself, as well, so he reaches out to snag his own orange from the box, rolling it along the countertop to loosen the peel before quickly stripping it down.

The taste bursts sweet across his tongue. Of course Piltover won't export oranges to the Undercity. They can't have Zaunites developing a taste for sunlight.

***

Viktor's hands are deft and skilled. Jayce knows this; has seen the evidence of his work, his elegant script in their shared notebooks, the fine detail work on the pieces and components of their creations. He has a light touch, deliberate and confident, and more than once Jayce has gotten distracted watching Viktor work. He compares Viktor's hands to his own, often; he knows his broad palms and thick fingers speak of strength, but Viktor's are no more delicate than his own, for all that they are lighter and more nimble. The both bear collections of small wounds; Viktor's nailbeds are often torn and shredded, red and inflamed at the corners where he nibbles off his hangnails and teases at flaps of loose cuticle.

And maybe that's the reason why--the remembered sting of citrus in an open wound making him shy of it--but despite his very adept hands, Viktor seems absolutely useless at peeling oranges. His nails, chewed bluntly down to the quick, can't pierce the skin; no matter how Jayce tries to help, showing him tricks of rolling the orange across a surface or digging in to the navel where it once hung from the branch, Viktor inevitably tears holes into the delicate flesh, juice squirting out in all directions as he craters into the skin. He tries, once, to bite through it with his teeth; Jayce can't help but laugh at the disgusted expression his face shifts into when the bitter oil lands on his tongue and gums.

He doesn't think Ximena would quite approve of the way in which they devour the crate of oranges between them, especially as it makes the need for trips out of the lab to the cafeteria or to the food carts on the streets outside less and less necessary; their diet dwindles down to primarily oranges, for 8 to 12 hours out of the day, when they remember to eat at all, both of them appreicative of the chance to fulfill their bodies' needs without having to get up from their work stations at all. But they're healthy, and its better than not eating anything at all, Jayce thinks--which has often been the case for Viktor, at least, unwilling to abandon his train of thought for even an hour to satisfy his body's demand for nourishment. And for all that trying to peel them frustrates the hell out of his partner, Viktor seems to have developed a taste for them.

Eventually, Viktor stops even trying. He'll reach for an orange and roll it about mindlessly on the table top for a few minutes as he thinks, or ponders a particularly challenging runic equation. He'll roll one of them back and forth between his palms as he stands at the chalkboard, eyes raking over their scrawled notes and diagrams. And sometimes, he simply grabs an orange out of their dwindling supply, and plops it next to Jayce's elbow without a word. In all cases, the wordless request is there; and every time, Jayce takes up the orange, peels it, and sets it back on Viktor's side of the table. Often--not always, but often enough--he'll get a quick smile from Viktor, a duck of his head in thanks, before he goes back to whatever he was working on or talking about.

Sometimes, he pushes the orange back to Jayce's side, and Jayce realizes that he has not in fact eaten yet that day.

Sometimes, when they get stuck, Viktor pushes his rolling stool a few more feet away. They bandy ideas back and forth, hypotheses and refutations, as they toss an orange to and fro across the lab; a break from the monotony, the bright scent of citrus oil sinking into their palms, waking up their tired minds, until one or the other has a sudden brainwave and they can get back to work.

Sometimes, in the time it takes for Jayce to peel the fruit, Viktor's mind has already moved on to something else; and the orange sits, bare and shining, skin slowly drying out in the staticky, dehumidified air of the lab. Jayce takes a certain kind of glee in pulling off a segment when this happens and waiting for an opportune moment--usually while Viktor is expounding on his latest theory, or ripping into one of Jayce's--to pop the orange into his mouth, interrupting him for a brief moment. Viktor's expression is always a delight--first the irate response to having food shoved in his mouth, but then, usually, a look of resigned bliss as he bites down, filling his mouth with a burst of flavour and brightness, and inevitably holding out his hand for the rest of his orange as he continues.

***

When Jayce visits his mother the next week, she doesn't seem surprised when he tells her, a bit sheepishly, that they've already worked through most of the crate. He tells her about peeling oranges for Viktor; he relays the series of misfortunes that Viktor has encountered, watching a soft smile spread, unconsciously, over her features. It makes him feel warm; he stumbles over the rest of his words, finishing the story lamely, but she doesn't say anything about it. Her hand rests over her heart, over the locket she wears around her neck. He doesn't know what her expression is saying.

She walks with him to work that day, forcing a detour to the produce market, where she insists on buying another crate and placing it in his arms. "You boys need to eat," she says, "and a mother worries. Oranges are better than a diet of coffee."

Its not until he kisses her cheek at the entrance to the Academy grounds and bids her a good day, tells her he loves her, that he realizes how similar his orange-story must sound to her own memories, peeling oranges for his father in the forge.

***

"More oranges, Jayce--!" is Viktor's exclamation when Jayce arrives, grimacing a little as he walks into the lab. The market detour made him later than usual. He thinks if he had gotten here first, Viktor probably wouldn't have even noticed the supply replenish, but it's hard to obscure an entire crate of fruit in ones arms.

"It's my mother," he explains, sheepish. "She is convinced we don't eat enough, and now that she knows we've been going through the oranges at a breakneck pace..." He shrugs, and sets the crate on the countertop. He tips the last few oranges from the week before on top, and tosses the empty rigid-paper crate in the direction of the door.

Viktor squints at him. "You are just enjoying my torment. You enjoy mocking me. 'Ah, poor Viktor, he is so incompetent he cannot even peel a fruit.'" The way his tongue rolls on fruit sounds like music to Jayce's ears; he can't help but laugh a little at it, which just causes Viktor's playful scowl to deepen further. "'I must continue to ply him with citrus, to keep him humble, in the hopes that he forgets that I am incompetent in everything but the peeling of oranges."

Jayce has already pulled out two oranges to approximate a breakfast for them both. He peels one in a long, continuous spiral while Viktor continues on his "tirade", plopping it down in one open palm as the gesticulations--a habit of Viktor's whenever he sets out to mock Jayce, exagerrating his admittedly expansive hand movements--come to a pause. Viktor looks down at the orange, then back up at Jayce, who grins, shrugs, and pops an orange segment into his own mouth. "You done?" he asks. "Because I can take that back, if you don't want it." Viktor's fingers curl around the globe, settling into the slight divots between the segments, cleaned of pith as best as Jayce can manage. "Mmm. That's what I thought." He turns away from Viktor, and pulls over a tray holding a pile of metal discs and a handheld grinder.

"Ridiculous man," he hears Viktor mutter; then again, the consonants shaped this time around a mouthful of orange, "absolutely ridiculous." It sounds affectionate, and pleased, and warm; like the sunshine in the orange is beaming out from Viktor's lips, washing over Jayce like a warm summer morning. Jayce shoves the remaining quarter of his own orange into his mouth, cheek bulging out as he chews, and begins notching gears.

***

It's not as though they only eat oranges. Jayce is well aware of his body's needs, to maintain his physical ability in the forge, to retain his muscle definition and physique; he takes pride in his body, he won't be ashamed of it. And, too, he is hyper aware of the needs ot Viktor's body; as it rebels against him, as it deteriorates, the need to eat a balanced diet and intake all of the essential macronutrients for survival becomes ever more present. Viktor doesn't thank him for the fuss, but Jayce keeps a careful tally of everything Viktor eats, to his knowledge, and tries to force himself out of his hyperfocused headspace when it's necessary to ensure they are both getting what their bodies need.

They still take short walks--shorter, now, than they used to be, and Jayce knows that Viktor knows even if he doesn't comment on it--to some of their favourite places, when the need to consume something that is not either coffee or an orange becomes strong enough to pull them away from the lab. When they have a breakthrough, they celebrate at a restaurant, rewarding themselves with a socially acceptable dinner (instead of digging into the work with even more fervour than before).

But every week, Ximena buys a new crate of oranges, and Jayce brings it in to the lab. The space constantly smells of citrus, now--it's a clean, bright, fresh scent, combating the metals and oils and the ozone-copper tang of magic that suffuses their working space. Jayce feels more awake when he walks in each morning, the sharpness hitting his olfactory senses and sending a signal to his brain that makes him alert and attentive. He thinks it is having an impact on Viktor, too--his mood noticeably lightens, his sharp edges of frustration growing a little fuzzier, a little softer, whenever Jayce hands him a freshly peeled orange to combat an ornery mood. He starts collecting the peels, tipping handfuls of them into the jar of vinegar they keep for cleaning their work surfaces. The orange oil infuses into the sharp, acrid vinegar, balancing out the harsh scents with something bright and warm.

And Jayce's hands--they smell like oranges all the time, the scent of it lingering in the bits of zest caught under his nails, the oils worked into his skin. He is surrounded by it; he closes his eyes and feels sun-warmed, comfortable, memories of walking through orange groves flitting through his mind's eye. It's comforting in a way that feels strange until he makes the connection--his mother, peeling oranges for his father in the forge, then coming to gather him up from his minder with orange oil on her own skin. It awakens something in his subconscious, a feeling of home and safety and family, and he realizes--

It's a scent he's started to associate with Viktor, too.

Which doesn't quite make sense--after all, Viktor doesn't peel the oranges, isn't getting his hands and fingernails sticky with orange juice, doesn't have to pry clumps of rind from under his nails when he goes home every day. It makes Jayce a little sad, to realize that this smell he associates so strongly now with Viktor and with their lab might solely be from his perspective. That maybe Viktor doesn't smell of oranges at all. That they haven't left their mark on him the same way as they leave their mark on Jayce.

How many oranges, he wonders, does a person need to eat per day before the essence starts to bleed through their skin; before their cells are infused, like the vinegar in the jar, before that brightness is lent out to their fingertips and palms? If he breathed Viktor in, would he smell of sun-bright citrus, warm and energizing, waking up Jayce's senses?

If he kissed him, would he taste oranges on his breath?

The grinder slips, scoring a rough scrape along his finger, and he bites back a yelp as he is brought forcibly back down to earth from wherever his thoughts have been wandering. Viktor's head shoots up from where he has been working on screwing together the framework for a calibrator, eyes wide and alarmed. Their gazes meet, and Jayce feels a flush creep over his cheeks.

Where did that thought come from?

***

Ximena tuts over the scrape, spanning along the side of his finger nearly from the mound of his knuckle all the way to the tip. The antiseptic solution stings, entering his skin and contacting his nerves through what must be hundreds of tiny nicks, each grain of the rough sandpaper abrading away a tiny piece of his skin.

There is another crate of oranges sitting on the counter, waiting for him to take it to the lab with him when he leaves.

He wants to ask her a question; but he doesn't know how to put it into words. About peeling oranges. About infusion. About how long something can sit in solution with something else before they become inseparable, orange oil in vinegar. It's a silly urge; he is the scientist, after all, these are things he should know, but its less about the combination of molecules than it is about something...more. Something he has no experience with, but which he knows she does; knows it in the way he thinks back to that conversation about peeling oranges, the expression on her face when she spoke about care, her hand resting over the locket, over her heart, the way his foggy memories of both his parents sharpen whenever he first splits an orange peel with his thumbnail and feels that fine mist spray into the air.

He doesn't ask her anything about that, doesn't say anything at all as she tends to his hand, wraps it up with thing gauze to prevent infection. "You're quiet today, caro," she remarks when she's done. He offers her an apologetic smile.

"Sorry. Thinking through a hypothesis. I'm fairly certain I know the answer, but...I'm having trouble testing it."

She tidies away the first aid supplies, taking them back to their place. Jayce cradles his hand, still stinging, against his chest. When she returns to the kitchen table, she's carrying a small plate with half a dozen golden-brown muffins. Their tops are dotted with gleaming jewels of candied peel, and large crystals of sugar, and curls of pale yellow zest.

"Maybe you're not asking the right question, then," she suggests. "Or maybe your heads addled from too many oranges, and not enough of anything else. Are you actually managing to eat a balanced diet? Or did I condemn my son to a lifetime of nutritional deficiency?"

Jayce has to laugh, as he takes a muffin at her urging. "Well, at least you know I won't die of scurvy," he jokes back as he tears off a bite. Her comment sends him back, to long hours bent over schoolwork; the frustration of trying to sort through scientific procedure, of having to rein in his instinct and enthusiasm for something testable and repeatable, experimental design.

The muffin is sweet and warm, a little bitter from the copious amount of zest inside. He groans his appreciation, and she answers it with a beatific smile. "These are so damn good, Ma," he tells her. She swats his arm for swearing. "Can I take one with me? For Viktor?"

She looks at him, and he swallows as the weight of her regard falls on him. There's something significant in her even gaze, as it flicks down to the muffins, then back up at him. He knows, before she tells him--

Viktor made them.

***

Jayce does take a muffin for the road--for himself, seeing as Viktor likely has as many as he would want after having baked the batch. He tucks it into a corner of the box of oranges as he walks, his mind racing. It's not--it doesn't need to mean anything. Anyone can slice an orange in half with a knife, cut through the barrier to get at the flesh inside, juice it and squeeze it into a batter. It's just--the peel. Diced, and finely, but not enough to hide the pieces with a rough and ragged edge, distinct from the knife work on the other four sides. The way some of the little chunks, enrobed in sugary syrup, still have tiny shreds of pith clinging to them, encased like a bug in amber. That's not--if you cut an orange apart to get at the pieces you needed, or if you bought those pieces already prepared, those things wouldn't be--

And of course, it's not like Viktor is incompetent. One doesn't need a pristinely peeled orange for use in baking, it's not like it matters, he could massacre a pile of oranges and still get what he needs for the recipe, but--

If I kissed him, would Viktor taste of oranges?

"Maybe you're not asking the right question."

Do I...want to kiss Viktor?

***

Jayce feels himself moving slowly, when he pushes open the door to the lab. There is a reluctance to it; not fear, but hesitance. For a man normally so bold with discovery, it doesn't quite feel like him, but for all their talk of changing the world--this hypothesis feels like it could shake every foundation of everything Jayce has known, up to this point, more than any he has had before.

He sets down the box of oranges; there are none left to replace on top, and he's fairly certain there were some still in the box last night, which means the fruit in the muffins came from their supply. Viktor took them home; he didn't buy the ingredients pre-prepared. He takes out the muffin, and sets it, carefully, at Viktor's work station; in the space where he normally deposits his coffee mug. It's maybe a bit overdramatic; the morning sun slants in through the window and falls directly on it, setting the candied peel to glistening.

He takes a few moments to bustle about the lab, pouring clearning vinegar onto a rag and wiping down the stainless steel surfaces until they are gleaming, until the only thing he can smell is oranges. His pulse is pounding in his ears.

"Maybe you're not asking the right question."

Does Viktor...want to kiss me?

An hour passes; two. Jayce can't sit still; he grabs Viktor's notebook, and flips through the pages, reviewing the work from the last week, jotting down some observations in the margins and copying some thoughts down into his own collection of notes. He grabs a second book, comparing work from two months ago to the work they are refining now; finds an inconsistency, corrects it, copies it into both books so that they are each correct. He balances them in one hand and copies a few figures onto the chalkboard, the chalk screeching against the slate, his lines shaky.

Finally, he hears the door open ehind him, the tapping of Viktor's cane as it hits the ground with every step. He hears the unusual pause as Viktor comes intot he room, enough to see the muffin sitting in its beam of light--or where it used to be; the sun has moved, and the shaft from the window is creeping now along the very edge of the workbench and up the wall, putting the pastry back into shadow. Still, he knows he sees it. He thinks he can hear Viktor's brain calculating from here. The other man says nothing. The tapping of the cane resumes, and when he hears the creak of the stool settling under Viktor's weight, he turns on his heel, plastering a nonchalant, sunny smile onto his face.

"Good morning," he offers, and aims for casual as he closes Viktor's notebook, tossing it gently towards the the end of the workbench so that Viktor can re-shelve it in the stack of books and notes and loose papers accoring to whatever strange filing system he's adopted. "Everything okay? You were a little late getting in."

"I am fine, Jayce," Viktor says. He doesn't sound quite fine; his voice sounds a little strained. Kind of like his own. Viktor clears his throat. "Just had a rough start to the morning. Pain acting up; I opted to move a bit more slowly, and allowed myself some time to soak in epsom salts before I made my way here."

Jayce makes a sympathetic noise, settling into his own chair, tossing his own notebook down onto the work surface. "I'm sorry to hear that," he says, and he means it. "You've been having a good couple of weeks; sorry that the pain's back."

"Eh. It is what it is. I will deal with it as I always do," is Viktor's reply.

"Is there anything I can do?"

The question is met with silence. Jayce tries to keep his hands busy, as though the question isn't loaded with weight and meaning, as though he hasn't placed an accusatory muffin right in pride of place on Viktor's work station, like he doesn't have a hypothesis buzzing in his head based on nothing more than instinct and disconnected observations. But his eyes flit to the side, trying to catch a glimpse of Viktor--his posture, his body language, his expression. HIs partner is extremely still, for a moment, then a moment omre.

Then he moves. Jayce watches as he reaches out, past the muffin, and snags an orange from the box. "I'm a little hungry," Viktor murmurs quietly. Jayce turns a bit more, swiveling in his seat to face him more directly. Viktor isn't looking at him; his eyes are watching the orange as he rolls it back and forth on the countertop, smooth, measured motions, flicking from it to the muffin and back again. The motion stops, the orange pinned between his fingertips--deft, nimble, strong--and the desktop. There's an orange tinge under his fingernails.

Then, decisively, Viktor flicks his fingers, sending the orange rolling to nudge up against Jayce's elbow. Viktor's eyes lift to his face, and there's a sweet, tentative half-smile there. Jayce isn't sure he's ever seen an expression like it, not on Viktor, at least. He can see the small gap in his teeth, the crooked line of his lower jaw. He's close; closer than Jayce realized. When he speaks, Jayce swears he smells oranges.

"Would you mind peeling an orange for me?"

***

When Emily peels an orange, she tears holes in it. Juice squirts in all directions.

"Kate," she says, "I don't know how you do it!"

Emily is my best friend. I hope she never learns how to peel oranges.

- Oranges, Jean Little

Peeling oranges 🍊🧡

[tojisteddy]

Yes, I do think Toji is canonically forgetful.

He’s forgetting the grocery list even though you wrote it for him so he wouldn’t forget but it gets lost anyway because he forgot where he put it. He’s going through the isles and getting what seems right because he can’t remember what’s in the fridge and can’t ask you cause you’re at work.

The list was in the back of his wallet.

There are always sticky notes around the house of random notes, ‘to-do’ lists galore. He always has to do a pat down of himself before he leaves the house, ‘keys, wallet, phone’ always in that order. He’s the type who’ll remember whatever he forgot once he was right outside and he’ll circle back in the house to retrieve whatever he forgot.

He plans out dates, but doesn’t remember the time. And is always two embarrassed to ask you because it’s something he set up for you. So he’s racking his brain as he gets ready, looking through the plethora of notes left around the house until it finally clicks. He’s running to meet you, buying a bouquet of flowers at the train station and dashing like his life depends on it.

Of course he makes it. 15 minutes late, but he makes it nonetheless.

Cursing up a storm at the up tight hostess to, ‘move out my fuckin way! My spouse is in there!’ Flowers slightly crushed in his hands, a little out of breath and he takes you in, who’s got an amused look on your pretty face.

“Shit, you look good mama.”

Toji is always going ‘huuh?’ ‘who?’ ‘mmh?’ and ‘what?’ Touching the top of his temple with his fingers like it’ll help him remember. It doesn’t.

And it’s a complete surprise, when he gets home and a confetti popper goes off in his face. Both of your dogs are barking, one with a Spider-Man suit on and the other with a pink party hat, the dinner table is properly set with his favorite food, he favorite wine to match, Panic by The Smiths playing from the living room, you’re in his favorite black dress that hugs your hips and your tits look perfect. And there’s a banner with a few painted paw prints on it, an angry mark and ‘Happy Birthday Toji’ in large bold letters.

Oh, his birthday.

Was it that time of year again?

He’s forgetting your friends names, nodding like he remembers but he has no fucking clue who you’re talking about until you bring up some memory of the two of them meeting and then he’ll remember.

And of course, he’s forgotten your anniversary and birthday before. It frustrated you, so you’d go on about the night like it was nothing. A birthday dinner with friends and some with their spouses but shit, it would’ve been nice for that ass hat to be there.

But then you’d get home, setting the gifts from your friends down and kicking off your heels. But there are candles burning, those damn sticky notes are scattered on the kitchen counter, all with your name and ‘don’t forget!’ written on them. And his journal, which you’ve only seen a couple times since you’ve been with the older man, was wide open with your birthdate written at the top of the page. And multiple lists of chicken scratch filled the two pages full to the brim and you’re sure they continued to the next page. All of things the man loved about you.

From your curly hair, eating habits he found cute, your pretty tattoos, your chestnut skin glowing in the sun light, from the way you fuckin blinked your brown eyes— all of it was there.

Toji was fucked up in the head, from his past to now— life wasn’t easy on him and it showed. From the way he reacted to things, to how forgetful he was. It came from the trauma. But you made life worth living. He’d be damned if he forgot even a minuscule detail about you.

You walked to the sound of your favorite playlist coming from the backyard. The dogs were there, both adorned with party hats and they came running at the sight of you and there Toji was. Plain black shirt and black jeans, muscles flexing as he fixed some fairy lights with a party hat tilted to the side like a fuckin idiot— just how you liked it.

You looked back at the clock on the oven; 11:43 pm.

A breathless laugh came out of you. Sniffing, fanning your face as tears danced on your water line because you paid a cute penny to get your makeup done for your big day.

Toji heard you, and made his way towards you. Words couldn’t express how sorry he was but he didn’t bother saying it. He knew it wouldn’t comfort you, fixing mistakes did though.

He was trying. You knew from this birthday set up to those notes he’d leave around the house, the multiple calendars— he was really trying. And sooner than later he’d get it right because he loved you and would do anything to prove that he loved you.

He grabbed the last purple party hat that read ‘birthday girl’ and set it atop your well defined curls that was parted to one side, you’d spent an hour trying to get right. Toji took your face in his large hands, gently rubbing at your cheeks, fuckin adorable.

A kiss to your eyelids, your temple, then your pretty dark brown lined, matte lips.

“Happy birthday Doll.”

a/n: couldn’t stop listening to Everything by Kehlani while writing this. On a really bad Toji kick rn.

[whiskis]

A/N: Hi there! For those who don’t know, first part is here. (If that link doesn't work, try suscribing for free to Patreon and check this one) Enjoy!

Orc professor (part 2): late for class

Orc x chubby fem!reader || power dynamics, dom/sub undertones, exhibitionism (kinda), oral sex, size kink, age gap, degradation, praise kink

“If you want to show me your pussy, my cum better be leaking out of it. Do you understand?”

His words still echoed in your brain when you were getting dressed the next morning. You were already wet, and you fingered yourself to the memory of his dick in your pussy last evening. You were a bit sore, but the fact that you could still feel him made everything more intense, hotter… sexier. And it made everything so much better.

You decided to wear your pencil skirt this time, and blame it on your bad luck, but you spilled your coffee all over it. Cursing yourself, you changed as fast as possible, but not fast enough that you could get to class early as you knew you should.

By the time you arrived, he was writing something on the board. “Good morning, sir,” you enunciated very slowly, looking at him for directions as you saw the other few students entering behind you.

He turned around and stared at you with such intensity you felt your whole body react. You were almost panting, biting your lip not to groan out loud. “Good morning. You can sit down while I go to my office for a second.”

The other two students nodded and he passed you on his way to the door. He looked at you in such a way that you knew what you had to do without him having to say anything. You let your stuff on your usual seat and smiled at the girl who sat next to you, mumbling about going to get some coffee before class. She nodded with a smile and you had to stop yourself from running to his office.

You arrived just in time for him to pull you inside by the waist, pressing you against the door and kissing you senseless just like he did yesterday, his tusks feeling incredible against your jaw. His hands were traveling up and down your body, groping your ass and your thighs as he grunted against your lips.

“Fuck,” he whispered against your lips, pulling back and passing his hand through his hair in a frustrated gesture. “You were late. And I thought you regretted what happened yesterday. I was freaking out, little human. And then you walked out like nothing happened looking hot enough to eat and smelling like me… Good goddess. Do you know what you do to me?” He pressed his hips against your middle and you moaned at the feel of his huge hard on.

“I- I can feel it,” you stuttered, your voice quivering when his hands squeezed your ass, parting your cheeks and letting one of his fingers rub over your lace covered asshole.

“You have no idea. And now I can’t even fuck you properly. I can’t ruin you the way I want because you were late.” He punctuated each word with a squeeze and a roll of his hips. You panted, so horny you were about to burst and he didn’t even touch you. “Goddess, you smell so fucking good…” He whispered, burying his face on your neck and inhaling deeply.

“I’m sorry… I- I spilled coffee on my skirt and had to change and then I forgot a book and have to open the door again and…” Your rambling was interrupted by his lip covering yours again, swallowing your explanation as he grunted, his hands massaging your ass-cheeks once again.

“What do you have after my class?” He asked, his breathing labored, almost desperate.

“A couple more classes,” you told him, mentally checking if you could skip any of them. But you knew you couldn’t. You knew you shouldn’t. You were a damn good student… Even if you were fucking your way through one of your subjects.

“Shit.” He passed his hand through his hair again, messing it up and making you want to whimper. “Okay, okay. I have classes after lunch, but I’ll be here around four-ish. Does that work for you?” You nodded fervently. “Okay, I expect you to show me how sorry you really are for being late and depriving me from what I was promised.”

“I can… I can give you my panties now,” you offered, feeling the lace sticking to your pussy lips like a second skin because you were that wet.

“I don’t want them. I want you to be feeling how wet I made you all day. I want you to be uncomfortable and thinking about my cock deep inside your pussy until you are so horny you are desperate to come. Until you know how slutty you really are…” You moaned, his words igniting a fire inside of you that made your brain short-circuit. “Now, compose yourself, we have a very interesting class ahead. I’m sure you are dying to know about the survival strategies of cacti,” he said with a laugh, making you let out a choked giggle. You weren’t expecting him to joke. Shit, why did that make him hotter?

The class was boring, but you didn’t even care about it. You didn’t care about anything but the feel of your wet panties against your pussy and his words resonating inside your brain. He made a point of looking directly at you a couple times, going as far as to ask you something about what he was saying, just to huff in annoyance when you didn’t answer correctly. But he smirked in your direction and that was enough to send you spiraling into a thousand of new horny thoughts.

You left his class as fast as you could, trying very hard to look normal when you passed him, but his knowing smile only made your clit pulsate harder, your core clenching around nothing and making you want to beg him to take pity on you and fuck you right then and there. But you were stronger than that, so you left his class on your way to the next one.

You didn’t take a single note the rest of the day, your brain filled with possibilities and images of his hard dick. The feel of his lips against yours, and the ideas of how would feel against your lower lips… Your brain was running a mile per minute, and you couldn’t focus on anything that wasn’t the rub of the lace against your clit. It was exhilarating and maddening at the same time, and by the time four rolled around, you were on the edge and you had to run to his office in need of release.

You knocked rapidly, and when you opened and saw him there, shirt rolled over his big green forearms and glasses pushed down on his nose you almost came right there. Fuck, he was so fucking sexy it wasn’t fair at all.

“Come on in,” he said as soon as you closed the door behind yourself.

You tried to lock it, but he shook his head… Oh shit, that made you even wetter. The idea that you could get caught. That somebody could just walk in and know how much of a slut you were, that you were fucking your professor for a good grade…

You moaned and he chuckled. “Come here, little human, I almost hear your brain short-circuiting.” You walked to him, your steps measured so you wouldn’t fall. Your knees feel like jelly, and your pussy is so wet you are sure he can hear it from the desk. “So… Did you think about what you are going to do to redeem yourself from not meeting your end of our deal this morning?” You nod. “Go ahead, tell me.”

You’d been thinking about it all day. Your whole brain occupied by thoughts of his cock inside of you, against you, spilling in and over you… But there was one thought that surpassed all others. “I- I want to suck you off, sir.”

He smirked, his tusks framing his plush lips in a way that made your clit tingle. “Is that so? But you have such a tiny human mouth, I don’t know if you’d be able to fit me…” He teased, making you blush. You gave him your panties everyday, and that’s what got you to blush, him teasing you… Incredible.

“I will. It will. It will fit, sir,” you stuttered. This orc made your brain so fuzzy you could barely process words correctly anymore. You could barely talk when he was close, especially now that you were moments away from sucking his dick down your throat.

“Prove it then, little slut.”

You dropped to your knees so fast you moaned when you hit the floor, the spark of pain focusing your brain for a second. But the second you touched his big-as-tree-trunks thighs, your brain disconnected again. Only heat and lust left behind. You pulled down his fly in a slow movement, staring up at him as he looked back at you with an indescribable look.

You took his dick out and gasped again. You already saw it, you had it inside of you, but it was nothing compared with the realization that you were about to fit that inside your mouth. Maybe he was right, and it wouldn’t fit.

His eyes were tender when he looked down at you. “Relax, you don’t have to take all of it, just whatever you are comfortable with. I like you submitting to me, but I don’t want to hurt you in any way. Do you understand?” You nodded, relief running down your body and making you even hornier.

“Okay,” you whispered.

And then you launched.

You pulled out your tongue and started mapping the veins of his huge shaft one after the other. His hands were gripping the arms of the chair with such force you could hear the leather breaking. You smiled against his dick and he grunted, one of his hands fisting your hair and urging you where he wanted you more. You complied, you wanted nothing more but to be a good girl for him, a good slutty human for him.

You took his head into your mouth, your lips so stretched it was almost uncomfortable, but you liked it. You loved the feel of his cock inside your mouth, it was exhilarating in a way you weren’t expecting. You weren’t one to like giving head in general, you preferred to go down on girls than guys, but definitely wasn’t your go to activity, but right there… You fucking loved it.

You rolled your tongue around the tip, teasing the underside where you knew he was especially sensitive. He moaned over you, his fist pulling at your hair and making you moan around him, which made him almost whimper and let out a series of curses that would make a pirate blush.

You kept going at it, you couldn’t get past a few centimeters, he was too wide for you to get him to the back of your throat, but by the glassy look in his eyes you understood it was enough. You were messy, your saliva getting everywhere as you bobbed your head up and down.

He was looking down at you reverently, and you couldn’t hold back a few more moans, who made him thrust up accidentally. You pulled back coughing, eyes teary and a few tears rolling down. He groaned at the sigh, and you felt your clit pulsating with your heartbeat. You were so close to coming, you wanted nothing more but to touch yourself. You threw your body to him again, but he stopped you with the hand tangled in your curls.

“I want to fuck your pretty face, would you let me, little slut? Would you let me use you like my personal fuck toy?” You whimpered, nodding against his thigh as he pulled your head back by the hair. “Such a good girl for me, already so needy and desperate. Look at you… You look so dirty like that. Remind me to take a pic so I can enjoy you later,” his words made you emit a guttural moan.

The idea of him taking pics of you like that, make up running and lips swollen… it made you feel hot. It made you feel so horny you could feel your juices dripping down to the floor under you, your panties so wet they couldn’t hold your gushing pussy anymore.

“You like that? You like me having pictures of how pretty you look all fucked up? Why do I even ask, of course you do, you are such a little slut for me. Now open up.” You obeyed and he directed his dick back against your welcoming mouth. “Tap my leg three times if it’s too much, okay?” You nodded again. “Words. How many times?”

“Three. I tap three times if it’s too much,” you repeat, breathless already.

“Good girl.”

And then he started a brutal pace. He used his hold on your hair to direct your movements, moving your head forward until you couldn’t take it further and then retreating. Repeating that process until something inside of you gave out and you felt him slip inside your throat. It was almost too much, you couldn’t breathe, but your eyes rolled back into your head at the sight of him in pleasure.

He pulled back to let you breathe, looking down at you with reverence. “You look so fucked out I want to ruin you. Would you let me ruin you, little human?” You nodded, unable to form words. “Such a good girl for me.” He pulled your head forward and started to fuck your mouth in earnest.

Your brain was fuzzy, your pussy so wet you could feel it dripping down, and your clit asking for attention. The weight of his cock against your tongue, his hand on your hair and his curses over you were driving you insane.

“Touch yourself for me, little human. Come around your tiny fingers. Show me how much you like sucking my orc cock,” his permission was enough, your hand traveling down your body and rubbing frantically against your clit, over the lace.

His pace became erratic, and your fingers rubbed so hard you were almost afraid to set your clit on fire. But it was so good, the combination of sensations so intense you were about to come.

“I’m about to come. Do you want it? Do you want to swallow my come or do you want it in your face, little slut?” You sucked harder, pushing your head further down, swallowing around him to indicate you wanted it. You wanted to swallow him whole.

That was all it took. He growled over you and pushed his dick as far as he could before you felt the first shot of his come in the back of your throat. He pulled back a little to avoid chocking you, the final spurs of his release filling your mouth to the brim, some of it dripping down your chin.

The second he opened his eyes and looked down at you, his dick still in your mouth, you were done. You flicked your clit one last time before you melted, pulling back and spilling the rest of his come over your boobs as you cried out your own release.

Your vision whited out, your ears ringing as you felt your body moving as he pulled you up onto his lap, his hands caressing your back as he whispered sweet nothings that your brain couldn’t process.

He took some tissues from the box on his desk and carefully cleaned your messy face. “You didn’t take the pic,” you told him.

“We didn’t talk about it beforehand. I wouldn’t risk stepping over your possible boundaries like that.” Your heart skipped a beat. “But don’t worry, we’ll have more opportunities if that’s something you’d enjoy…”

“We will?” You asked, a bit confused but a spark of hope blooming inside your chest.

“I’m not letting go of your sweet, sweet slutty pussy anytime soon,” he told you, kissing your forehead as his hand traveled down until it met your dripping panties. “I would like this panties now, thank you,” he whispered against your ear, you could sense his smirk on his tone, making you laugh so hard you snorted.

Reminder that you can find all my other stories over @monstersflashlight

[horoscope1078]

:)

Gavi had made many bad decisions in life, like challenging Lewandowski to a shooting contest, drinking three espressos before a match, and once thinking he could cut his own hair. But none of them compared to agreeing to a second driving lesson with you.

Yet, here he was, sitting in the passenger seat of his car once again, watching you adjust the mirrors, this time not to check yourself out, thankfully.

“Alright, Gavi, I’m ready.” you declared, placing your hands on the steering wheel.

Gavi folded his arms. “We’ll see about that.”

You smirked. “Still don’t trust me?”

“After last time? Absolutely not.”

You sighed dramatically. “You act like I crashed the car.”

“You almost killed me.” Gavi corrected.

You giggled. “Then why are you here again?”

Gavi opened his mouth, then closed it. He had no good answer. The truth was, you had looked at him with those big, pleading eyes and said “Please, Pablo? I’ll be so good this time.” And, well… he was weak.

“Let’s just get this over with.” he muttered, adjusting his seatbelt like it was a life vest.

You started the car, this time actually easing onto the road without giving him a heart attack.

Gavi let out a small, surprised nod. “Ok… not bad.”

You gave him a smug look. “See? I told you I-”

HONK!

You shrieked, swerving slightly. “WHAT WAS THAT?”

Gavi clutched his chest. “It was just another car!”

“Well, it scared me!”

“It’s a road! There are cars on the road!”

You huffed. “You didn’t warn me about that.”

“Oh I’m sorry.” Gavi said sarcastically. “Would you like me to warn you every time we see a building too?”

You stuck your tongue out at him and kept driving.

Gavi relaxed a little, watching as you navigated a turn surprisingly well. “Alright, that wasn’t bad.” he admitted.

“High praise coming from Mr. Perfectionist.” you teased.

Gavi rolled his eyes. “Ok, now try switching lanes.”

You signalled, checked your mirror, and started to move over.

“Slowly, slowly- NO NOT INTO THE OTHER CAR!” Gavi shrieked, gripping the handle above his seat.

You corrected yourself, just narrowly avoiding disaster.

Gavi exhaled sharply, rubbing his temples. “You have to check your blind spot.”

“I did!”

“You turned your head for half a second! That’s not checking, that’s glancing.”

You giggled. “You sound like my grandpa.”

Gavi shot you an offended look. “Excuse me? I am twenty years old.”

“Could’ve fooled me.” you teased.

Gavi groaned. “Why do I even try?”

You smiled innocently. “Because you love spending time with me.”

His mouth snapped shut.

You smirked. “No denial?”

He coughed, looking away. “Focus on the road.”

You laughed but did as he said. You drove in relative peace until you reached a quiet street.

“Ok” Gavi said, regaining some confidence. “Now let’s try parking.”

“Easy.” you said, pulling into an empty spot.

The car was diagonal. Practically in two spaces.

Gavi stared. “What is that?”

You blinked. “Parking?”

“Parking where? In two different countries?”

You pouted. “It’s close enough.”

Gavi threw his hands up. “Close enough? You can’t just park wherever you want!”

You turned to him with a playful smirk. “Oh, really? Is that a rule, Professor Gavi?”

“Yes! That’s literally the law.”

You giggled and purposefully leaned closer to him. “And what if I don’t listen?”

Gavi’s brain short-circuited.

You were too close. He could feel the warmth of your shoulder brushing against his. His usual furious glare softened, and his ears turned pink.

“I... I...” he stammered, gripping his seatbelt. “Then you’ll get a ticket!”

You tilted your head. “But you’re my instructor. Wouldn’t you get the ticket instead?”

Gavi blinked. “Wait, what? No! That’s not how it works.”

You burst out laughing. “Oh my God, you should see your face.”

He scowled. “Not funny.”

You reached over and poked his cheek. “It’s a little funny.”

Gavi swatted your hand away, ears now fully red. “Just park properly before I actually lose my mind.”

Giggling, you corrected your parking, and this time, you actually did it right.

“There.” you said proudly. “Perfect.”

Gavi exhaled. “Finally.”

You turned to him with a smirk. “Admit it. I did well.”

He huffed. “You almost killed me again, so no.”

“Oh, come on!” you pouted. “I did way better than last time.”

Gavi crossed his arms. “Fine. You were less of a disaster.”

You gasped dramatically. “That’s the nicest thing you’ve ever said to me.”

He rolled his eyes. “Don’t push your luck.”

You leaned in closer again. “Or what?”

Gavi’s entire body tensed. “Or I... I” he turned away, covering his face with his hands. “Ay Dios mío...”

You laughed. “You’re blushing!”

“I AM NOT!”

“You totally are!”

Gavi groaned, sinking lower into his seat. “This is worse than the driving lesson.”

You giggled and patted his shoulder. “I think we should have lessons every week.”

“Nope. Not happening.”

“Oh, come on, Pablito” you teased, batting your lashes.

Gavi looked at you for a second. Big mistake. Because the second your eyes met, he felt his heart skip in the dumbest, most embarrassing way.

“Fine...” he mumbled.

You grinned. “See? I knew you couldn’t say no to me.”

He crossed his arms. “I hate you.”

“No, you don’t.”

“Ok, fine, maybe I don’t...” he muttered.

You beamed, leaning in to kiss his cheek. “Thanks for the lesson, Coach Gavi.”

His whole body stiffened.

You pulled away, smirking. “Still hate me?”

Gavi, now fully red, turned to the window and muttered “Start the car before I change my mind.”

You laughed, starting the engine, while Gavi sat there, utterly defeated. He was never winning against you. And honestly? He kind of loved it.

[weekendviking]

Oh fuck yeah.

One time I was on a remote exploration drilling and field mapping job in the Yilgarn Craton in West Australia (Kimberlites! Diamonds! Archaen Banded Iron Formations!), and with just me, the driller, and two offsiders, so all hands on deck, all the time, both due to the work, and just the extreme environment and living difficulties in a desert camp, several hundred km from Paraburdoo, the nearest town. Not uber remote, but definitely outback, and if you fuck up, dying is extremely possible.

Anyway, in the first week, the driller suggested that we could even the workload by bringing out a friend of his who was an experienced camp cook, and at face value, this seemed like a good idea, and within the budget for the job, freeing us up from some of the camp domestic tasks to concentrate more on the drilling for them, and on the core logging for me, and my field mapping work (not required, but I did it anyway because I was suspicious the Joint Venture partners had falsified their data, which they had, but that's a different story!)

However, new drill team staffer was not doing well. Yes, she could do the work, but was clearly mentally in a bad state, and even though the Driller was trying to keep a lid on it, we could all see that she was in severe distress.

It came to a head after another week or so, when, as was my schedule, I'd go out and do the field mapping work in the mornings when it was cool, come back to camp around 11 to catch an early lunch, and then head down to the drilling site to log the core in the afternoons when it was too hot to be running around the hills.

Pull up to camp, Cook is sitting at the table under the awning, slightly slumped. I get out, walk up, and she's bleeding from the back of both wrists. The Back, mind, across the veins, not the arteries, so oozing badly but Not Actually Going To Die Soon. She was clearly embarrassed to be discovered in this state by 'The Whitecollar Guy', and produced a poor excuse of having cut herself prepping the days meals, and I didn't gainsay that, as one is clearly not going to further stress or question someone partway through a suicide attempt, just deal gently with them and help them. I pulled my field medkit from the car, and started to prep to treat the cuts, with both of us doing the 'We know You know I know this was a suicide attempt but lets just put that aside and not talk about it' dance, but she did at this point say 'Oh, I'm hepatitis positive' so at that point I Paused Bigtime and gloved up properly, (and also mentally 'Then why the fuck are you allowed to be the (admittedly tiny company) company cook' was running through my brain).

Treated the cuts, got her cleaned up and had a quiet chat, then got on the radio to the drill site and got the driller down to camp, and had a quiet chat with him, to whit 'Ok, I don't know what you were thinking but you need to get her safely off site and back to Perth and to a good facility because she's clearly going through it bad'

Turned out that she was his partner, and had been having difficulty getting clean off intravenous drug use (hence the Hepatitis positive) and he'd thought 'If I get her out in the bush where she can't get the shit maybe that will help her dry up'. So the poor lass was going through a hard cold turkey withdrawal while stuck in a tent and caravan camp in the middle of fucking nowhere while having to do a Job on a lax, but still corporate, work site. Don't do that, guys.

We had her offsite and on a plane back to Perth that evening. I hope she recovered, but I never did hear any further news.

Aspencore

[m-to-z-andbackto-m]

No you don't understand, it's not just a hyperfixation, IT'S LITERALLY THE REASON I'M FUNCTIONING 😭

I don't like staying hungry or eating when I'm not sure if I'm hungry or bored because Horror exists, he's been through a famine, tf am I doing???

I get upset about my hypersomnia and I try really hard to not to let it happen because many skeles are associated with narcolepsy

I'm pretty sure consuming skeleton content cured my depression over a few years???

God, I'm literally so dependent on them, I LOVE THEM SO MUCH THO!!!

I try to avoid toxic behaviors when I can identify them, and it's easier to because Nightmare is a toxic guy canonically, I've consumed enough content to know what's right and wrong in the long run

On the other end, seeing content where one or more of them gets comfort helps me navigate some situations because generally I'm not amazing at giving comfort

They also have me think about my philosophy and general beliefs, a lot of them have been done wrong so they do wrong, therefore I believe we should always try to understand each other because communication can avoid huge issues (DreamTale), and I think it's okay for people to take revenge, even to the extent of killing an abuser if the circumstance just happens to be that way (I'm not gonna specify what irl situation I'm thinking of but I do not advocate for murdering people in general guys, but it's only fair to see the motive, people aren't born criminals and sometimes the extreme feels like the only way out one way or another. Essentially, see people for more than their crimes. Of course some people are just disgusting assholes, but you get the idea.)

Having to memorize the lore and world building, along with creators, characters, interpretations, AND variations, doing all this helps me practice organizing thoughts and articulating difficult information

They actually boost my creativity and keep me happy, when I'm stressed, opening Tumblr to my favorite sillies literally takes my mind off whatever was bothering me, like I actually need them to lower any anxiety levels and keep me regulated

However on the downside they can make me very hyper, sometimes so emotionally so that I shut down for a bit because I physically cannot express my adoration for them and it's overwhelming but I never shut down for too long, I love them, they keep me going y'know!

They help me explore diversity and character writing, putting depth and thought into a being, helps me with my own creations <3

Actually, I'm too shy to look at × reader/self insert/(Y/N) content most of the time unless it's platonic (Might just be me being aromantic honestly) BUT I Have seen stuff where they affirm body types and "Flaws" and stuff like that and I think if I was less of a prude I could look at that stuff and it'd make me feel better about my insecurities, but for now my partners are doing a good job at keeping me normal

Essentially I just need all my sillies to work properly!!! 💕 (I'm so sane, and normal, and not senile about them :3)

(CW For Next Bit: Mental Health, Paranoia, Panic Attack Discussed)

Actually about that, my obsession with the skeletons used to be SO bad that I felt like they were always watching me and my brain would involuntarily make me feel paranoid and bad about myself (Possible ODC symptom where you're afraid of being judged for your thoughts/actions?) and I can't tell if it was a panic attack I had a couple years ago where I couldn't keep caring what they "Think" and I just had to scream and sob because you literally can't hold it in during one (If it was this, I guess I sorta pushed them away D:), OR my partners replaced my brain sillies so I feel them to a lesser extent

(Insecurity, Self Care Issues, And Gay Talk 😭 Oh and also mention of paranoia again but not so bad)

Like it used to be so bad I couldn't get up because I felt yucky, but I couldn't take a shower because they were "There", but now it's like, if my partners are my brain sillies, they like me, we'd probably take showers together when we live together and shit like that, it's okay if they're "Watching" me, actually, they're actual people somewhere else, doing something else, they don't just exist because I think of them the way the silly skeles do, they're actually defined and aren't actually around, it's just me thinking about them, it's okay, I don't have to feel so bad or weird about it, of course I still do a bit because insecurity is hard to scrape off, but I think I'm getting a little better and that's all that matters

Anyways point is, I need my wives, both skeletons and real, to function properly or I'm literally DOOMED

[xfriki26]

THE PEOPLE HAVE SPOKEN

(two specific people but that's cool, thanks @lolipoptheclown and @fymo-blogs )

🍮 Diabeticdivorce (Candy Dealer x Dolores) 🍭

Ah yes, the old divorcees

Their dynamic in the past would be something partners in crime style, they were young, stupid and foolishly in love.

Now their relationship is more...

You have screwed up my whole life but for God's sake I would still fuck you.

You know what, this song fits them a lot LMAO

💉Deadfigther (Agatha x Patty)🥊

Their love language is acts of affection, since they do not worry about their own health, the other person makes sure that they take care of themselves.

They also have a "How can you love me?" and "How could I not?" relationship

Also, Agatha has horrible rizz, Patty thinks its adorable.

GRRR I'M GOING TO DO MORE OF THEM, PREPARE YOURSELVES FOR TOMORROW.

[paintedcrows]

Preparing for your first holiday season with your griblings is hard. Especially when your grand niece insists on celebrating Every. Single. Holiday.

[collophora]

Do yourself a favor and go read the entire fanfic work of @fanfoolishness

(In order: Under sun and shade, Blind Side, and Breathless (patching up is one of my fav too, I just had no cool sketch idea for it)

[daeyumi]

Ruined Town 🪲⚡️

I’m actually super proud of this piece, I wanted to push myself out of my comfort zone to do something dynamic & complex with hopefully a somewhat interesting composition, and I really worked hard on it. I’ve been feeling kind of down on my art recently tbh, like I’ve stagnated a bit, and this piece really helped me to experiment a bit more & try out some new brushes & techniques. Can’t wait to experiment & draw more soon! 🩵

[tapakah0]

Animation commission I guess...

Um... ha-ha, okay, it has been stuck in my head for the whole month, but if I will keep it any more I will explode, I need to busy my brain even more I'd like to take an animation commission. Like, a fully colored, shaded, with lightning, with in-betweens, with the clean line (and background). Up to 5 seconds depending on what you want to get I guess the price may start from 250$ and be higher or less depending on complexity of the details, character or movement (<- of course everything will be negotiated) I never took such commissions before so please be patient with me since I might spend even months ha-ha (really wanna beat this fear of taking something more complex) But I will do my best since it will be first experimental time for me 1. Payment via Boosty after acceptance of the sketch animation (very rough idea) 2. I think I can draw mostly anything (but won't 18+, guro and I can decline something if I feel like I will not like to do it) 3. You must have a reference of the character, I'm not ready to work with something that doesn't have a ref to start working right away 4. Please, properly think of what you'd like to see, I will not make 3 different rough animations of different ideas because you suddenly had another idea ;~;; 5. Note me in dms if you'd like to take commission... (I'd like to move to discord later since it's more comfortable in here) Uh... I have only this as a more or less proper example (it was based on amazing storyboard by yeye23)

Okay, I'll just leave it here if someone really will be interested and will delete if it if it will be decided.... I just feel like my brain is dying if I don't have an enjoyable/stressful more complicated work on a side that demands an attention from me. Have a nice day

[elodieunderglass]

Do you have more Moby Dick: Modern Translation chapters anywhere that certain interested parties (me and everyone with taste) could read?

In reference to this translation of Moby Dick into insufferable modern idiom, in which Ishmael is suddenly shown up in a startling light as a person we’ve actually met and knew well but didn’t really like:

I’m sorry, I haven’t written any more of that! After chapter 1’s mad rush of energy, the book tackles more tricky, boring and unfunny content, including passages that are just uncomfortably problematic in any time; and, like, entire chapters about listening to a church sermon.

A line translation (and that is mostly a very faithful line translation! The only thing I regret not doing was perfectly capturing the fart joke!) apparently has a lot of educational value, and helps to reframe the whole novel. That’s worthy work! But i simply wouldn’t want to do a line translation on the next few chapters. My brain is picking daisies instead, already. I would say: “sorry, I’m abridging this for my own mental health. You’re eligible for a free refund.” In which case the educational value is negligible (you can just read the plot summary online. There’s a really big whale in it.)

Anyone else who wants to take a stab at it (FROM HELL’S HEART) would be welcome and I’ll gladly promote your efforts. It’s just. I am going

🌼-🌼-🌼-🌼-🌼-🌼-🌼

- come here let me measure your head

[bottlemandx]

award for most neurotic 13 year old goes to...!!!!

(LOW-EFFORT FUNNIES UNDER CUT)

[brainrot-yumm]

hello, dogman enthusiast/fellow overthinker here who owns a lot (but not all) of the books, and I have very few answers but still that's better than nothing aint it

I'm very sorry if at any point I start coming off like i'm "um, actually"ing you, I'm just having fun treating the questions like puzzles

There are significant spoilers below so I'll block it to be safe

one) ''silly and unrealistic unless they're projecting'' is crazyyyyy

two) I'm pretty sure the implication is that Greg the dog is significantly more sapient than Knight. It was emphasized a whole bunch that Greg had a ''supa smart'' brain (at least one that was smarter than Knight by a lot). And despite having dog instincts, he still is fully capable of making plans and understanding complex conversations and gestures (ex. he becomes Chief's wingman after a certain point so he understands human displays of romance enough to help replicate them) so I'm like 95% certain that if Knight's head had been decapitated juuuust a little higher up for Greg to have the human vocal chords, that would've been a talking dog. if he had opposable thumbs he woulda been the one driving the cop car.

two point five) THE MOST SPOILERS HERE. the Petey redemption arc takes a lot longer in the books. like in the book that the movie took most inspo from (tale of two kitties). they don't team up at all. Petey just watches and goes "eh, I'm evil, whatevs". He still sacrifices himself by going in 80HD but he isn't pardoned at all, it takes like 5 more books before he actually turns to good and starts properly coparenting Lil Petey. Movie just had to super quickify it for runtime reasons. So is Dogman a little dumb for befriending the murderer of his bestie? maybe. but at least it wasn't an instantaneous thing

three) You're so right he absolutely does not see that human body as his. Lol to him. But also, while animals absolutely can experience loss, being able to understand the why's and specific memories of his past to grieve over should absolutely be counted as a sign of intelligence. Also buying a doghouse from the real estate lady. Dogman pays taxes. Dogman DOES taxes.

four) thinking about it, I'm pretty sure he does most things via muscle memory. Cause the thing with Knight was that he had kung-fu skills, right? that's a very mental thing to be able to do. He had to be trained for that. So if Dogman can still do kung-fu or whatever, than either it's because there's a little chunk of Knight still left in his head, or the muscle memory of the body carried onto the dog. I'm sure he probably still needed physical therapy of some kind though, cause like, as you said, brand new body he's working with. My guy has a new center point of balance. He doesn't even have a tail to balance with, for pete's sake. poor dude. It makes more sense as time goes on and he gets used to the change, though

five) George and Harold are reading stuff like Wuthering Heights at this point. If they were allowed to canonly age any more we would be subjected to the most thought provoking psychological material ever. They're gonna make it big in their world.

six) what's Dogman's lifespan looking like? Will he age by human years or dog years?

seven) what about illnesses? How did Dogman's immune system not reject an entire new body? How did Knight's immune system not reject a new head?! Is he more likely to contract dog diseases or human diseases? Could he potentially accidentally be the best place for viruses to mutate?

eight) what would be the most ethical, if Dogman fell in love with Knight's ex-girlfriend, Petey, or Sarah Hatoff's dog Zuzu? That's a fun puzzle to think about.

nine) no idea about the food one. I just. ionknow. Dogs and people are both omnivores. Das all I got

that is all

I've never wanted someone in-universe to look at a character and go "what the fuck did they do to you" until now

(Minor dog-man spoilers but nothing that wasn't seen in a trailer until stated otherwise)

I'm pretty sure everyone's gone through the "I just thought of the concept of dogman for more than two seconds and have decided it's fucked up" phase but its destroying my mind at the moment

Now I know I'm not supposed to read too into it because George and Harold's writing is generally silly and unrealistic unless they're projecting but i'm going to do it anyways.

How does dogman even make noise?? Are the stiches attached by the top of his neck or the base?? Because that drastically changes his vocal range if it's one or the other. I'm assuming it's he's attached to officer knights body at the base of his neck so it makes sense that he can't speak.

Does he need physical therapy??? I'm pretty sure the human body isn't supposed to move like a dog's. We've all seen him move like he would if he was still normal but no matter how natural it feels we're bipedal and he's forcing his body to do quadruped. Would he have to curb his dog behaviors in order to not harm knight's body? (Note: In my eyes, he 100% doesn't see officer knights body as *his*, even though he controls it. It is one of the last things he has of him after all.)

But he does have moments where he just doesn't do that at all and walks and runs like a human should + whatever fighting style he uses. Is he doing these things off of muscle memory from officer knights body?? If so, what the hell happens if he wants to learn something new??

What does his diet look like? We've seen him eat dog food but I'm pretty sure that's not healthy in the long run for a human's body. I don't know anything about serious about biology, but dogs can't eat chocolate because of their stomach, no? So can he taste chocolate for the first time? Does he inherit Knight's allergies??

[Spoilers below the cut, but the general idea is questioning if he can be counted as sapient or not, so buh bye if you haven't watched it yet!]

Most importantly to me, because I really want to enjoy the Detey ship but there's always this question ringing in my head, did he get smart enough to be counted as sapient? The procedure was vague as George and Harold fumbled the specifics but there had to be some neural surgery from his brain to his body right??

It was cute and all, but his interactions with petey, especially after becoming his friend after he recently killed his best friend was a bit concerning in the mental department. I know most of this can be boiled down to "the middle schoolers aren't Shakespeare" but come on lemme overthink about this

I NEED ANSWERS THAT I WONT GET GAAAAAAAAAH

[quibbs126]

Do you think if Starscream kicked D-16’s ass (and also Sentinel’s forces didn’t show up like 5 minutes later), he could have been undoomed from the narrative?

I feel like that’s the encounter that solidified or at at least encouraged in D-16’s head that brute force and violence is the solution to his problems

[trainerethan]

I wonder. Would red be a light sleeper, since on mt. silver hed need to be on guard for any wild pokemon or anything else. I already said i imagine him having a very consistent sleep/wake cycle so he usully goes to bed and wakes up without an alarm since...yknow he didnt have one on the mountain. That said deviating heavily from his routine could probably throw him off. If he didnt get enough sleep hes groggy and a bit annoyed by whatever made him lose out on his precious sleep time, whether it be wild pokemom or a particularly strong storm or whatever. Since he sleeps lightly to stay on alert, these things do wake him up and can throw him off a little for the day. Thankfully he lives on a mountain so its not like he had any plans that would be thrown off by it, just his own annoyance with his routine being foiled.

Perchance when he was on the mountain and he slept lightly for self preservation or whatever, now that he and green live together hes become a deep sleeper who could sleep through a lot bc he can finally relax and trust that he is safe and doesnt need to be watching out for any potential problems he could have as mountain man. Green is here now, and red knows he can be vulnerable and relax around her.

Green is extrmely touched by this, but also its a little annoying when they have plans and reds sleep/wake cycle made of netherite makes it difficult to wake him up before he usually would. He can but then hes groggy and doesnt want energy drinks or coffee so he takes awhile to fully wake up on his own lol.

We win some (complete trust and love for your wife and the happiness of the proof of how reliable and safe they see you as) and lose some (your beautiful wife trusts you so much he now sleeps through alarms and must be woken up by you specifically or you have to wait until his usual wake up time) im sure they figure some middle ground out after awhile but at first reds dedication to getting a full 9h of sleep is certainly annoying sometimes.