#my boys deserve so fucking much they get no shit fuck this hell hole what the actuak fuck

[claynine]

Hi, I was wondering if you could write about Muzan in his final form getting pegged by the reader? And maybe add some pet play if that's okay for you?

Thought I'd do this ask as the first one back lol, hope you enjoy! (Btw I'm working on all the requests I have, dont worry! ♡)

Warning: bondage, pet-play, praise, pegging,

Embarrassed, he felt absolutely embarrassed yet... he couldn't deny that he liked it. The way your hands were squeezing his plump thighs, nails digging into his skin, leaving red stripes along the way. It felt delicious, making his mouth water.

"Tell me, Muzan-sama..." you purred, you're fangs showing as you smirked up at him. You gripped his thighs again, earning a grunt from him. "Are you... my good boy?"

He glared weakly at you, no, no, he's the demon lord. But... the thought of being a good boy, no, of being your good boy... it made his head spin into a mind space were he couldn't do anything else but say...

"Yes..." he said quietly, almost to soft for your liking. "I am..."

You smiled, pulling yourself up. He looked beautiful, his hands tied tightly to the headboard of his king size bed. His white locks creating a halo around his head, his face showing nothing but lust. Truly, a masterpiece.

"Good, I guess then... I should give my good boy a prize, right?" He tensed at your words, feeling suddenly lightheaded at what he saw.

You pulled your kimono off, showing your bear body, and a white, big strap on. He burned holes at you, hating the idea of being fucked by you instead of fucking you. He could easily break free from his restraints, kill you on the spot, yet... he couldn't. Fuck, he couldn't.

You grabbed his marked thighs, spreading them apart. You poked his entrance with the tip of the strap, looking at his reaction. He sucked in a deep breath, brazing himself, he didn't stop you, he couldn't stop you, not when he felt so good just by being weak against you.

"My good boy..." you leaned forward, and bit his exposed neck, he gasped softly as you begin to push inside him.

It was big, too big. Heck, maybe even bigger than his own. And that made it hotter.

"Fuck you." he glared at you as you pulled away from him, smiling. The darkness of his room enhanced the brightness of his red eyes.

"Muzan-sama, that's not nice." You pushed all the way inside him, he chocked on his spit.

"F-fuck-..." you leaned forward again, pushing one of his legs on your shoulder, letting the tip press directly on his prostate. He swore he was seeing stars.

"Especially since I plan on fucking you really good..." he looked down as you pulled out, almost entirely.

"Agh! W-wait... shit-" you thrust inside him fully, watching his stomach bulge at the size of your dick.

He moaned loudly, and you enjoyed the sound. Thrusting inside him roughly, rearranging his guts nicely and thoroughly. Making sure he felt as much pleasure as possible. And fuck he was feeling it.

"Y-yes... fuck yes...!" He moaned, his nails digging into his palm, drawing blood. His body felt hot, as if he was in hell right now, and still he felt like he was in heaven at the same time.

The room was filled with his moans, the sticky clap of your hips meeting his. Your eyes stuck to his face. Big red eyes rolled back, tears forming.

"More, more-" he tried to look at you straight in the eye, so he could demand you to go harder. But his eyes flew to the back of his head with every delicious hit the tip of your strap landed on his prostate.

"So cute, my little master, hm?" He didn't comprehend what you said anymore.

"Cum-... gonna- gonna cum-" he tried to alarm, as his pleasure weld up into a ball, ready to explode at any second, one more thrust, just one-

He looked at you in shock as you stopped. His eyes filled with tears, a weak glare directed your way.

"Do you deserve to cum?" You asked him, you thrusted into him harshly, he moaned out, on the brink of his orgasm. "I don't think you do..."

He felt like crying, even though he already was unbeknownst to him. He moved his hips desperately, looking for any friction.

"Don't- don't stop-" he finally used his force, breaking out of his restraints, but to your surprise he didn't use his freedom to kill you.

He gripped your hips, his tentacles appearing out of nowhere, they wrapped themselves around you.

"Cum, let me cum, I'm a good boy!" His deep, demanding voice now unrecognizable. "Please-"

You gripped his hips tightly, and began moving faster than before. Your lips twisted into a smirk, you kissed him, swallowing his moans.

Muzan on the other hand was crying. He felt too good, his senses turned to mush, electricity flowing through his body. He gripped the sheets, tearing holes in them. You pulled away letting his screams of pleasure consume the room.

"Cumming, Cumming, fuuuck-" his trapped your body as he came, biting your shoulder, you moaned in pain.

His stomach was stained white with his cum, he continued to twitch as you pulled out slowly. His eyes closed shamely as his cheeks turned pink. How was he going to explain this...?

Obviously the uppermoons heard, as the next day he clearly walked funny. And even though all the demons were quiet, a certain demon with rainbow eyes couldn't hold his giggles.

Don't copy.

Property of clay9z.

[dantakeyoman]

pls part 2 to neteyam defending you 🫡🤍 but this time i'd love a continuation to motherly neytiri tending to reader!! and her hinting at the fact she had seen them and their son share a kiss after trying to find out all the commotion once hearing overprotective jake lose his cool at ao'nung!

Jake Is Pissed At Ao'nung, and Neytiri Talks To You About Your Kiss With Neteyam After All the Commotion (SFW)

Part 2 of "Neteyam Defending You"

CW: my dude Jake goes crazy, starts talking really freely to the Olo'eyktan, Neytiri is so nice and caring, best wing-woman ever, jake x reader (platonic; father-daughter-ish)

"What the hell is the matter with you, boy?! I oughta fight you right now!" Jake shouted as his eyebrows furrowed, the boy doing his best to try and understand the angry, English words.

Jake always switched to English when he was mad.

It was instinct, and English had more expressive cuss words than Na'vi anyway.

"Mawhey, My Jake," Neytiri whispered, quietly stepping in front of her husband and resting her hands on his chest, her eyes flicking to the crowd of village people that started to form.

"Please. The people are watching."

The entire Sully family stood behind you and Jake, on one side of the walkway, while Ao'nung, his friends, and the rest of the Metkayina stood on the other.

It looked as if both sides were warring.

"Let 'em watch. This shit needs to be dealt with," Jake growled, carefully moving her out the way and getting ready to scream at Ao'nung some more.

"What seems to be the problem here?" Tonowari asked calmly, him and Ronal breaking through the crowd and stepping to the front.

His tone was calm, but you could see on his face that he was clearly angered with the fact that his on was injured, and the outsiders shouting at him.

"The problem here? I'll show you the problem," Jake whipped his head over to you, giving a firm nod.

You nodded back with a sigh, stepping in the middle of the clan divide and lifting your arms, putting all of your injuries on display.

The Metkayina gasped, and Neteyam had to be held back by Lo'ak and Kiri.

He hadn't realized the extent of the damage when he was carrying you, but looking at it now, he should've hit Ao'nung twice as hard.

You had hand-shaped bruises all over your arms, and one on your ankle from Ao'nung's demonstration.

Your face had a large bruise on it's right cheek, and a bloody nose from being dropped on your face.

And the statement piece of it all, the nasty, pillow-sized bruise on your side, which was leaking blood from Ao'nung's toenails.

"Your words. Treat these Forest people like brothers and sisters. I don't see this shit as very familial," Jake spat, pointing roughly at Rotxo.

"That little shit managed to squeal about everything done to (y/n). The grabbing! The kicking! THE KIDS DROPPED HER ON HER FACE FOR FUCK'S SAKE!"

Your breath hitched, silently thanking Eywa that the Metkayina did not have good English.

Ronal and Tonowari quickly turning to their son in anger, their gaze practically burning holes into the boy.

"Is this true?" the two hissed, no longer masking their rage.

And the look of absolute fear on his face was the icing on the cake.

It almost made you feel sorry for him.

....Almost.

"ANSWER!" Tonowari shouted.

"YES! It's true!" He admitted, hanging his head.

The entire crowd gasped, and Tsireya did her best to hold back tears as she looked at your injured form.

You were a very nice girl, and an incredible friend. You didn't deserve this in the slightest.

She could not believe her brother for doing such a horrible thing.

"My kids come back to me nearly everyday talking about how this kid is constantly harassing them-." "He calls us all freaks," Tuk sadly chimed, glassy eyed as she tucked her face into her mother's side, Neytiri taking deep, full breaths to keep her composure.

"But for the sake of peace, I let it slide. Well all that stops tonight! I want it to be made perfectly clear that if your son, or ANY of his little friends so much as lift a finger to ANY of my children, they will have to answer to me!" Jake finalized, resting a hand on your shoulder at the word children.

It almost brought you to tears.

You felt so loved, and protected, and safe. It me your heart swell with joy.

"Do I make myself clear?"

"Yes, sir!" Rotxo and the other boys frantically agreed, terrified that, not only did they witness Toruk Makto's anger, but were the direct cause of it.

Everyone turned to Ao'nung to hear his response, but he stayed silent, dazed.

"SPEAK, BOY!" Tonowari shouted once again, pushing the boy forward with his staff.

"Understood!" he cried, turning his gaze down to the floor.

"Good," Jake huffed, un-puffing his chest.

"You have brought shame to this family. Go to the marui. You are grounded," Tonowari glared at his son, pointing his staff back to their home.

Ao'nung nodded, quickly turning around and speed-walking over, Tsireya following behind, ashamed.

Jake scoffed at the display, before turning to you with a softened face. "Now you. Are you okay? Wanna go get patched up?"

"Yes, sir," you nodded with a smile, quietly wincing from the pain of your bruised cheek.

"If you would accept, I could heal your daughter for you," Ronal stepped forward, apologetically bowing.

"I believe your family has done enough for tonight. I will handle this," Neytiri glared, stepping in front of you.

Ronal clenched her jaw, but nodded, turning around to follow her husband home.

"Come, child," Neytiri smiled at you, carefully taking your hand and leading you to the marui, Tuk and Kiri following close behind.

They entered, and the boys tried coming in after, but Neytiri stopped them.

"We must talk. Alone," Neytiri knowingly looked up at Jake, who nodded.

"That's alright. I gotta talk to these two, anyway," he agreed, resting his hands on the brothers' shoulders and leading them to a more secluded part of the island.

When Neytiri turned around, you were already sitting down, Kiri preparing the salves for your bruises.

She walked over and sat criss-crossed in front of you, picking up a special leaf to clean off your blood.

"My (y/n), are you alright?" she calmly asked, lightly swiping the blood from your nose.

"Yes. It looks worse than it feels. Truly," you assured, the loud wince you let out when Kiri touched a bruise quickly debunking your statement.

Neytiri sighed, carefully lifting your arm to wipe the blood from your side.

She needed to lift your spirits.

"You know," she started, a smile growing on her lips. "You and Neteyam remind me of me and his father when we were young."

You practically choked on the air you were breathing, the coughing fit you were sent into not feeling the best on your ribs.

Though it seemed like perfect entertainment for Kiri and Tuk, whose uproarious laughter could be heard from the next marui.

"I am serious," Neytiri politely laughed, halting her swipes on your side with a smile so you could catch your breath.

"He may not act like it, but your father used to be just as reckless as Lo'ak, maybe a little more."

"Really?!" Tuk asked, amazed.

"No way," Kiri scoffed with a smile.

Out of all the times he had scolded that boy, he was just as bad.

"But he was strong. He had a strong heart. No fear. Almost never hesitating to fight if needed," Neytiri continued, starting to smooth the salve over your rib.

"I see this in Neteyam."

She glanced up from her work, looking you in the eyes.

"For me, I was always calm. I wasn't as quick to fight as he, but I was still strong, and determined."

She looked back down.

"I see this in you."

Your cheeks turned a dark blue hue, despite the splashes of purple and red alredy there.

"The Great Mother knows all, and I feel she did not make this resemblance for no reason."

Was she saying what you think she's saying?

"Neytiri, what are you-?" "I am saying you and Neteyam have my blessing," she smiled.

Your breath hitched.

"Oh! I didn't....we weren't.....I wasn't-!" "No sense in denying it, (y/n). The whole clan saw you swapping spit with the boy as you came over," Kiri shrugged with a smile, teasingly poking you in the cheek, wary of your injuries.

You groaned, hiding your face in your hands, embarrassed.

"Oh, stop," Neytiri chuckled, tucking a stray braid behind your ear. "I think it is cute."

bonus !!

Jake sat down on the sandy shore, Neteyam and Lo'ak sitting on either side of him, concerned.

"You two listen, and listen good," he started seriously, his tone leaving no room for games.

The two nodded, and the man continued.

"I want you two to watch that Ao'nung kid, and his little group of friends, too. Be nice for the sake of peace, but keep your heads on a swivel. If they say anything to your sisters or (y/n), you tell me, I'll sort it out."

Jake did a quick perimeter check, making sure no one was listening in.

"But if any of those little shits so much as touch a hair on their head, I give both of you full permission to beat the living shit out of each and every one of them. Don't worry about the repercussions, I'll take the heat. But that's gonna be the new protocol from now on."

The two boys nodded firmly, giving their father a serious look.

"Understood," Neteyam agreed.

He was glad his dad was giving him permission, but to be honest, he was going to end up doing this anyway.

Today, he made a silent oath that he was never going to let you get hurt on his watch ever again.

"Alright," Lo'ak smirked, cracking his knuckles with his fist.

"And as for you," Jake started up again, turning to Neteyam.

The boy gulped, bracing himself for a scolding of some sort.

"Who taught you how to kiss like that?" his father smiled, giving his son a proud pat on the back.

"Oh, yeah! Those two were going at it! They were like-." Lo'ak jumped up from his seat, hugging himself and making kissing noises.

"Aye!" Neteyam waved off with a smile, that familiar heat rising to his cheeks.

Jake chuckled at his boys' antics, throwing his arms around each one and pulling them into a hug.

This was what a family was for. Protecting one another, caring for one another, healing one another.

Jake had no doubt in his mind that his family was, and truly is, his fortress.

[suugarbabe]

Hey love, would you be open to doing a part 2 for soulmate Theo where reader actually fights someone that hurts him??

I know you have a lot of requests so no pressure or hurry (think this is like my 3rd in the last 2 weeks, im sorryy😭). Remember to look after you x

part 1

You were not often an angry person, but maybe being soulmates with Theo changed something in you. You were essentially boring a hole in the stupid blonde's head that was sitting next to Theo.

You and Theo hadn't quite had the conversation of if you were 'boyfriend and girlfriend' yet, but you both knew you were soulmates and were very much happy with that situation.

While you two haven't directly advertised that you were soulmates, or nearly dating, you two spend every moment of free time together, went to parties together, were basically always seen together. So why this bimbo girl thought she had any chance with Theo whatsoever was beyond you.

Pansy had tried to tell you that it was no big deal, that Theo looked disinterested during class next to her anyway. But when you saw the blonde girl touch Theo's chest after class, all you could see was red.

Before anyone could stop you, you were on top of her, swinging at whatever you could connect with. You had to give her credit, she did try to fight back, pulling your hair and getting a good swing to your ribs.

But you had to give Theo some thanks later, because any contact she made with you felt like a child. You hadn't even noticed you'd broken her nose until you felt warm blood on your cheek after a second blow.

After that all you felt were two pair of arms yanking you upward and away from the girl, you doing your best to flail and fight against their grip before you realized it was Mattheo and Theo.

Once they set you down your huffed, crossing your arms, "Why did you do that, I was going to stop. She deserved at least three more good swings."

Mattheo couldn't help but laugh, "Princess, please. She was bleeding so much she was turning in to a red head."

You rolled your eyes, "Good, blonde definitely didn't suit her. Or did it, Theo?"

Theo was rubbing the back of his head, "What are you talking abou-, Ohh...did you do this because you were jealous?" A smirk appeared on his face before it turned to one of pain, "For fucks sake, did she have to pull your hair that hard? Swear to Merlin 've got a fucking migraine now."

You couldn't help but laugh, "Serves you right. Not only were you blatantly flirting with her in class, but now you get to see how it feels every time you get in a stupid fight with some random kid."

You reached up and poked him in the ribs where you knew she'd hit you. "Bloody hell, y/n, don't do that. Fucking shit," Theo grabbed his side, taking a step back. You jutted out your lip in a faux pout, "Awh, Teddy, does it hurt?"

Theo scowled playfully at you, "You know you're cute when you're jealous." You took a step forward, trying to poke his side again, "Keep it up and I'll find another girl just to make you in more pain."

Theo held his hands up in surrender, "Okay, okay. I'm done. I swear. Only under special circumstances and even then I'll make sure he doesn't touch me."

You smiled at him, grabbing his face with one hand and squishing his lips together. "Good boy," you playfully mocked before planting a big kiss to his squishy lips. Theo actively ignoring the teasing from Mattheo on the nickname you just used.

[fartlovingblkguy69]

The Little Men’s Toilet Slave Part 2

And with that he turned around and I got to see the most magnificent ass. It was big and round, muscular with a nice layer of fat and hairy as fuck! I’ve never seen an ass so hairy before! This is the type of ass that I ordinarily would have wanted to bury my face deep in and rim for hours but given what I knew was about to happen I wanted to throw up! This was made worse by the fact that when he bent over teasingly, I was assaulted by a smell akin to hot sewage mixed with garlic and there were stains and dingleberries all throughout his filthy forest of a crack. As he backed up to my face he reached back and further spread his cheeks allowing me to see his hole underneath a thick ring of fur and his hole opened and pushed out, releasing a nasty sbd before slamming his hole down on my nose. Fssssssssshhhhhhhhhhhhh “Ah, I need to get rid of some more gas before I open the flood gates or else I’ll drown our new toilet bitch and then he’ll be no use to anyone! Let me see the footage we’ve shot so far while I relieve myself!” he said rubbing his aching, bloated stomach. He sat there farting away with his filthy hair hole sucking my nose in and constantly dripping a sample of the sludge that was about to fill my mouth into my nostrils. It was getting harder with each fart for him not shit all over me. I could tell, but he wanted to drag this out as long as possible and to be quite frank I was in no hurry to get to the main even myself. Finally after half an hour he slowly stood up and groaned “Open your mouth toilet! It’s time! I really can’t hold it anymore! If I smell or spill any of this I swear to God I’m gonna vomit all over your cute face and i don’t want that so after I make you swallow I’ll let Josh (the hot asf blond guy from earlier) and his boys stomp the fuck out of you! This can go easy or it can be extremely painful! Your choice!” He gently patted my stomach and started to sit back down. I reluctantly opened my mouth and watched in horror as before he was even seated his hole seemed to spasm and out pushed the biggest pile of slop I’ve ever seen! It was soft, lumpy shit, not quite liquid, but definitely nowhere near solid and it stunk like rotten eggs that had been left under the burning sun for days! It quickly filled my mouth and with much effort Kyle managed to pull his hairy hole shut. “Hurry up and swallow that! There’s so much more inside me and I will let it out all over your face if I have to! Don’t chew, just swallow! You can savor my shit another time! I’m in too much pain right now!” I struggled to swallow, my throat burning and closing, gagging and trying not explosively throw up the toxic waste that was in my mouth and nostrils and felt like it was penetrating every part of my being. He slapped my stomach and said “Round 2! Here it comes in 5 seconds and remember what happens if it doesn’t end up in your mouth!” I hurriedly swallowed and opened my mouth right as the next blast came bursting out. This continued for 6 mouthfuls over the course of the next 40 minutes with many wet farts in between each torrent of loose, sludgy shit. Finally he exclaimed “Damn that felt great to let out! I can’t believe how much better I feel! You can’t imagine how much pain I was in! Now lick me clean!” as I sat there and thought to myself, You were in pain? What about me you piece of shit! You narcissistic asshole! What the hell is wrong with you? But I knew better than to say any of that so I just lay there licking his entire crack clean in silence before moving to his disgusting hole. He smiled down at me and affectionately rubbed my very full, very bloated belly. “I think you deserve a reward for being such a good helper! I can’t wait to give it to you later! I think you’ll like it! In the meantime I gotta get back to filming! Anyone else need a bathroom break with the new toilet?” Of course there stood Josh with an evil smirk on his face. Here we go again! (To Be Continued)

[missuswalker]

Welcome!!! Could I please request a soulmate au with Kyle and a fem!reader? Maybe one of the ones where they share emotions / sometimes items from their rooms randomly spawn in the other’s / first words said to each other tattooed somewhere or literally anything that would be fun for you to write??? I literally love soulmate aus so I’m gonna gobble up anything u write no matter what. + I loved your Craig fic so much!!!! Thank you <33

thank you so much!! i love this so much, soulmate aus are so silly and giggly 🤭 (using the item spawning one 🤭)

is that mine? || kyle broflovski x fem reader (soulmate au)

My actually useful shit had been disappearing for weeks. I was constantly loosing pens and pencils as well as the book I was reading for school. What had I gotten from my soulmate? Socks. At least I knew my soulmate had big ass feet.

Coming home from school, I didn't expect to have anything new in my room, but I was wrong. A green notebook sat on my desk, the front covered in random brand stickers. I pick it up, sitting on the edge of my bed, deciding to flip through it. It's not like my soulmate would know that I was snooping.

The pages were filled with neat notes. Scanning over them, I realized they were just about the same as my history notes, just with a little more detail. So we have the same history teacher?

I had found out we went to the same school weeks ago, a South Park Cows sweatshirt winding up on top of my dresser, but I had no clue if we were in any of the same classes. As I continued to flip through the pages, I noticed a page with different handwriting accompanying my soulmate's.

It seemed to be a conversation between two people that went from messy to neat writing, drawings of dicks all over the top of the paper. I look more towards the bottom seeing my soulmate's writing with the words, "stop drawing dicks on my paper, kenny"

Kenny? Kenny McCormick? Well, damn. That crosses Kenny off of the list of possible people my soulmate could be. I was only slightly disappointed. Never once did I see my soulmates name anywhere in the stupid notebook. Tossing it to the side, I go to start on my homework that was due yesterday.

"Really?" I groan, noticing my favorite pen missing from its spot on my desk. I don't know why I liked it so much, it was just funny. It had a stupidly big pompom at the end, frilly ribbon around the rest of it. I end up just using a random pencil I found in the bottom of my bookbag, completing about half of my homework, before deciding I deserved a break.

After, like, three hours of going down a conspiracy theory video rabbit hole on youtube, I end up falling asleep, only to be woken up the next morning by my alarm. After snoozing my alarm multiple times, I finally pull myself out of bed, looking through my clothes.

Would I be insane for wearing my soulmate's hoodie? No, I like living in delusion. Pulling the hoodie over my head, I was quick to notice how clean it smelled. It smelled so much like laundry detergent, I was almost convinced it had never been worn.

Noticing I was already running behind, I finish getting dressed, grabbing my bag and rushing out of my house so I could get to school on time. I pull into the parking lot, deciding to just chill for a minute since I was already late.

Eventually, I ended up dragging myself into my math class, sitting down near the back. Pulling out my notebook and a pencil, I begin to doodle, not too invested in the lesson

"Dude, where the fuck did you get that pen," I hear someone whisper, a snicker coming from the same direction. Looking up, I notice a curly redhead holding a pen. My pen. What the hell?

"Is that mine?" I whisper, gaining the boy's attention. "What? No, it's my soulmate's." He replies, glancing at the hoodie I was wearing, his eyes widening. "That's my pen." I say, before looking down at the hoodie myself. "Is this...?" I begin, the boy nodding. "Mine. Yeah, that's mine."

I found myself just staring at him for a moment, before my lips tug upwards. He was cute. He gives me a bashful grin, handing me my pen.

"I would give you the hoodie, but I'm not wearing anything under it." I say, butterflies erupting in my stomach as I hear him laugh. "That's okay. You can keep it. Did you ever realize my name was on the tag?" He asks, causing my face to drop. "No. Damn, I would've found you a lot faster if I'd seen that," I mumble.

There was a silence, until he sighs, brushing his curly bangs out of his eyes. "Are you free after school?" My smile widens at his question, looking down to my shoes. "Yeah, you gonna ask me out?" I joke. "Maybe. You gonna say yes?" "Maybe."

a/n: GUYS I'VE NEVER WRITTEN A SOULMATE AU I'M SO SORRY, HOPING IT'S CUTE 🤞😍

[higuchisora]

As mentioned before, I'll be sharing my top 10 anime characters that could solo my beloved sweet baby boy Binghe. This is both serious and not at all serious. Disclaimer: I love him, he's my good son, but he also needs some competition to keep his head nice and deflated. I'm sticking with 1 character per show to keep things fresh. Also "anime" is a... loosely used term here lmao. Also also, manga/LN spoilers ahead for some shows.

Without further ado (and in no particular order):

10. Uzumaki Naruto (and friends)

Definitely the most obvious so I'm putting it first. Honestly the Naruto cast could've had its own top 10, but rules are rules. That Talk No Jutsu is fucking lethal. If he couldn't TedTalk Binghe into a reluctant friendship, he'd rock his shit first and THEN befriend him. Without so much as a filler episode.

I'm of the mind that any Kage-level character could wipe the floor with my son, Mano y Mano. But even a solid jonin team would have some serious hands for him.

9. Saitama from One Punch Man

I haven't watched the full thing, but ending careers with 1 punch is literally his job, so I'm taking this one on good faith that he'd also be fast enough to catch Binghe at all.

8. Yoriichi from Demon Slayer

The only thing that could defeat this man was his own sadness. He'd clap TLJ and then come for Binghe without so much as a snack break.

7. Hua Cheng from TGCF (yes I know it's a donghua shut up)

Call me biased, I don't care. Hua Cheng would obliterate this man without even thinking about it. He'd laugh, too, because he's an asshole. And then go home to bang Xie Lian.

6. Rimuru from That Time I Got Reincarnated as a Slime

I don't like this man or this show. But no one can tell me he wouldn't just. Eat Binghe. Like full vore, as is canon of his abilities. He's done it with physically larger targets and succeeded, he could do it for some pretty boy. Binghe wouldn't even be the first demon king he's fought.

5. Aang from The Last Airbender

I SAID WHAT I SAID. Specifically in his Avatar State, I firmly believe he'd clap Binghe if led to believe it was absolutely necessary. Like the literal world ending. He exorcised a man when he was 12, I think Aang at his peak could handle an emo boy in need of an exorcism.

4. Saiki Kusuo from the Disastrous Life of Saiki K.

He'd dust Binghe out of existence before homie even knew what hit him. Argue with the wall.

3. Yumiella Dolkness from Villainess Level 99

I don't even really like her, but considering she's taken on a demon king of her own before, and is capable of making black holes big enough to swallow cities without breaking a sweat, she'll at least be a worthy opponent.

2. Kumoko/D from So I'm a Spider, So What?

Literally a god. The world-ending kind, and that's when she's being chill about it. Hell, I wouldn't be surprised if she ended up being in control of the System tormenting poor SQQ and SQH. She's not as advanced in the anime, but in the light novel ending a world is literally light work. She's done it before and she'll do it again.

1. Mash Burnedead from Mashle

I haven't even caught up 100% with this show but I don't care. It doesn't even matter that Mash can't do magic. Actually, it's precisely BECAUSE he can't do magic that I firmly believe he deserves a place on this list because that just means this human dude is just Built Different. Binghe would throw a bunch of spiritual/demonic energy attacks at him and Mash would just bitch slap it out of the way. And then bitch slap Binghe. Worst part is that he wouldn't even realize they're fighting for real, which would permanently ruin Binghe's self esteem, IMO.

Honorable mentions:

Gabimaru from Hell's Paradise

I don't think he COULDN'T take Binghe on, just that it's unlikely he'd survive, honestly. Cultivation is real in their world kinda, and from what I've watched he's not yet capable of taking one on by himself 100%. But he's tenacious and skilled, so he'd at least get a few good ones in before Binghe smokes him. With a good crew and a battle plan, he'd be able to lock an average Binghe under a mountain.

Sailor Moon

The only reason she isn't on top 10 is because I'm not confident in her ability to take hits. She's great at dishing them out, but in the event Binghe manages to get a good whack in, I feel like it'll be over for her. I don't think she's fast enough to reliably dodge the whole time either. Plus, I barely remember the OG show, so it's kind of odd to be comparing her to stuff like Naruto, which I know well.

Hina from Hinamatsuri

Just offer a lifetime supply of red caviar and Binghe's a dead man. That being said, I don't think she'd walk away unscathed. This battle would mostly be dictated by how it starts. If she has the element of surprise, he's dead. If Binghe is suitably enraged (say, Xin Mo possession style), Hina's a goner. Hence she isn't strong enough to be able to beat him soundly in all scenarios.

Kaneki from Tokyo Ghoul

He's pretty cool. Also likes to eat flesh. I don't think he's as fast at it as Rimuru is, but then again I also gave up watching after the first season. Gets an honorable mention because he might actually be stronger than I think.

Goku

He's fucking Goku. I just have never watched this show so I didn't feel comfortable ranking him.

Kibutsuji Muzan + Upper moons from Demon Slayer

Any of them would be a solid threat. However, considering they get their asses handed to them by a bunch of human high schoolers and fold at the tiniest ray of sunlight, I figure the moons would be somewhat of a miniboss vs final boss in terms of power scaling.

Muzan probably would've gotten a place on the list if not for Yoriichi. Also, as said, anyone that gets clapped by a bunch of high schoolers in their own home gets a permanent L. Shine a lamp on him and it's over for bro.

Hashiras from Demon Slayer

Not a single one of them can 1v1 any upper moons. That being said, they still managed to body all of them. They go down with them though, so I'd say it would take all of the hashiras (maybe including pre-canon ones) to take down the average Binghe. And they'd all die doing it.

Hero of Time/Hero of the Wilds Link from Legend of Zelda

Is this an anime? No. Do I care? Not really. Fighting opponents wildly out of his league but ultimately winning anyway is literally his canon lore. All Link needs is a slingshot and an ocarina and he'll fight the fucking moon. He's no slouch in recent games either; a beef bowl and a stick is all it takes for him to take on the immortal demon king possessing the castle in nothing but his goddamn boxers.

This was my list!!! Very long, but a lot of fun. Let me know what your own lists are, I'm curious lol.

If I've not mentioned a show, it's probably because I've never watched it lol.

[bloogers-boogers]

Hi I know its been awhile but I need to ask is how do you ship Adam and Lucifer

Since they only interact with one episode and Adam dead ??

Agsisgskwushs dude where have u been??! Missed u💕🥺

Anyways, the whole reason why i shipped Adam and Lucifer is just their small interactions made it easy to imagine many possibilities, alternatives, hcs, etc. Mostly based on their funny dynamic alone (like Lucifer being a tease and Adam pissy about the whole cheating thing i was like agdjwgekwhe funny af and then THE joke of fucking him sealed their dynamic for me as my favorite from the show right there and there) and also to picture what it could’ve been? Like, there’s so many holes you can fill in there. That’s what got me so stuck with it, that you can add so much to their backstory, also, the fact that they use Adam being an asshole and stuff as a joke bc he was the first man so ‘it makes sense or whatever’ blah blah so my mind immediately goes, oh, so he’s like the punching bag of the show? Bet bet I love him. When they’re like the ones doing all the bad shit, villains, does the crazy stuff (Cartman for example) or taking the shit of everything/being the joke (Meg from family guy for example) I immediately just like them for no reason, I love my failure characters. It’s interesting cause I was so nonchalant about Adam when I first saw him on screen, if im being honest. I didn’t even blink an eye when he got killed off but then, I saw him without the mask and I was like, he’s hot agdosgslabxlshxos like i was more shock that there weren’t more people who agreed with that than him dying. But still, he wasn’t like a character that I thought of while watching the show.

BUT ANYWAYS to responding ur answer?

I just liked Adam. His personality is funny, his character is interesting. I like him. The same happened with Lucifer. He’s goofy and sad. His backstory is drawing but there’s so much left out that makes you wonder more about him. I love him.

It’s was all based on their funny dynamic alone that drawn me to be like, ay? Im gonna look them up and see what I can find. And OH BOY i was sucked in immediately agdkwdhwosueuo

And the fact that Adam’s dead could’ve made me not consider the ship at all, but the show is about redemption and ALSO hell and heaven. Aka souls. Meaning they already died. Soooo the possibility is there and we have a dead character and he was an angel but was very awful! And deserved to be in hell. Sir pentious could redeem himself (a sinner) so it only makes sense that winners can go down there too! If they’re deserving of it and obviously Adam was deserving of it agrlwbdkwdbwj

My brain works like that it’s silly but

Adam/ bad winner+ dying = sinner

Sir pentious/ ?? (This is a whole other rant I don’t want to dive in to abdoabdwksk) I do believe Sir pentious could’ve gotten to heaven regardless, but I feel it could’ve been written off better just cause … i mean, yeah, he sacrificed himself but like u can still sacrifice for the people that matter to u and STILL be a bad person/do bad things?? Im just saying ok??

Anyways, he’s now dead (again) and a winner.

Point be told. In this show it’s possible for him to come back (I don’t care if he was killed with angelic steel im ignoring it everything’s possible skgdakdvakvdw) and it doesn’t even matter if he doesn’t return in the actual show. In this universe u can still picture a sinner Adam and it would make sense??

Cause it’s hell and heaven we’re talkin’ about. And it’s fiction too so u can create your own story and it just I REALLY LOVE THEM.

Also other ships weren’t interesting enough for me to get stuck on them. I initially shipped Alastor and Lucifer the moment they were on screen and bf they got popular! Bc i thought their dynamic FUNNY/INTERESTING. Thats what gets me into shipping. It must be funny but also u can add some lore into it. I think I’ve mentioned this before with kyman.

But yeah, don’t get me wrong I like radioapple but once the popularity hit off and different hcs and the thousands of interpretations of the characters started coming out, i dunno i couldn’t keep up and I just kinda just stirred away from it. I ship basically everything on that show, it doesn’t even matter skgdwlshow so I’m open for any ship there is on there but adamsapple? MWAH. Always.

Sbdowosbdk thennnnnnn I started reading amazing fics about them and boi u can imagine how good they were!!

Anyways sorry for the long rant. In short. Adamsapple for the win 🥇💕💕👏🏼👏🏼

[mrstsung]

Plot hole here. I just discovered this. Ok but hear me out. Going by shang tsung mk12/mk1 tower ending....

If in mk1 they said that he doesn't need souls to live(avoid aging and dying) none explicitly stated. But its assumed.

And he's gained more mastery over them in an organic way. Incorporating magic qnd alchemy to serve him. Which isn't horrible. Kinda nice. Shang doesn't have that handicap. And honestly that's pretty sexy of him.

But

HOW DOES THIS STOP HIM FROM BECOMING OP AS FUCK?!!!!

The handicap was there for a reason. You dumbass liu kang you had one job!

But also if this is true. Then shang tsung in mk12/mk1. Definitely can't die then.

Whos to say he doesn't become a god in his own right?!

Which essentially he always and already is.

Like holy shit y'all nothing is stopping him.

I mean i want him to have a Win But holy shit not like that!

Like his tower ending is cool but it has plotholes. And the storymode has plot craters.

If this shang is not cursed but simply is a young master of soul magics. Then there is no way that he can be stopped.

Shang tsung is by definition and character for 30+ yrs of mortal kombats existence.

A fucking survivor and master strategist. He is not someone to take lightly. He is fucking dangerous and ambitious as fuck (love him for that) but like as much as i want him to win and beat the ever loving tar out of everybody.

I want it to actually make sense and flow naturally. Have something be a hindrance and a trade off for his new found power and stability from His beloved island domain. Where he rules like a god emperor he is.

That's why the collection of souls as a nessicary evil to live was a good thing. Not just narratively but it just makes sense.

Unless they pull a thing of "the gods cursed him by tapping too much into the soul well and by gaining power he went mad?" I guess but it feels too convenient. And too easy of a trope. And kinda boing and predictable.

This also kinda let's slide all the shit hell that the god/titans and liu specifically put him through. And i dont like that.

So either way. It's riddled with plotholes.

Shang tsung being op as all fuck. I hate it. But I'd take it over making him another bitch boy for plot and to make our "heroic" characters look better when they really aren't any better.

Im sick of that fr.

So shang tsung if he is gonna be op then he needs to have something to counterbalance with him.

So i propose.

Shang tsung doesn't age like he did before. No curse. Just gaining soul power. Blah blah you know the story by now.

But....lemme suggest. That like the gods. The further away from your dominion,the weaker your hold on your powers is.

Aha!

So if shang was in outworld. Away from his island fortress and home. He wouldn't be as strong. Nor would his powers or attacks. His magic essentially would be at its base lvl.

Which is pretty powerful dont get me wrong. But it's not on the lvl to best a god. So you could have a chance.

However unless he is near....a soul well...or vat. Hee hee. Then he can siphon it and gain strength that way. Or take piece by piece from an opponent like he always do.

But on his island? His home? His base? Fuuuuuck no! You're in his dominion now!

He's dangerous as fuck.

But i feel that is the ONLY WAY that would make sense.

Adding that rule. Would make it feel better.

But this is also applied to LIU KANG TOO! he on shang's island,is absolutely fucking weaksauce. And he has no power nor dominion.

JUST LIKE RAIDEN HAD. the rules still apply.

So curse my baby or add god dominion rules to him. Otherwise it's fucking annoying.

But you know what?! At this point im like fuck it! Make shang op as fuck. Make him have an easy win. He deserves it.

Have him gain a shitton of power. At this point im like,nah shang tsung you deserve to be op.

Fuck the narrative.

[stannyramirez]

𝐛𝐮𝐫𝐧 𝐟𝐨𝐫 𝐛𝐮𝐫𝐧, 𝐬𝐭𝐫𝐢𝐩𝐞 𝐟𝐨𝐫 𝐬𝐭𝐫𝐢𝐩𝐞, 𝐰𝐨𝐮𝐧𝐝 𝐟𝐨𝐫 𝐰𝐨𝐮𝐧𝐝

“I need some salves and shit for intense body beatings!” “Look, my husband got the living shit beat out of him and it’s all my fault!” “Help me take his pain away, pronto!” “You’re a fucking idiot. That’s what you are.” “This ain’t fucking Jurassic Park.” “I am so embarrassed for you because I am a professional martial artist.” “Come on. Let’s just you and me hang.” “Well, you know I love a sibs-free hang sesh.” “I’ll rip your asshole out and eat it and kill you!” “Get this pillowcase off my fucking face!” “These fucking animals snatched me straight out my whip!” “I figured out the part about the cousins being involved, maybe you can find some fucking clues, too.” “Let me guess, you were sitting there quitting, giving up.” “I am in no mind space to be teased right now.” “We have been kidnapped, you fucking bitches!” “Puke on yourself and eat it, please.” “Is that you in here screaming like a bitch?” “Well, we’re going to ransom you to your daddy for money.” “You deserve this life, dude!” “I can’t see you, but I can smell ya.” “Why don’t you laugh in my face, you motherfucker?” “It’s not funny to do jokes like that.” “And how can I help you on this blessed day?” “You ruined my life. You didn’t think I was gonna make you pay?” “Five million a head.” “You must think I’m fucking stupid.” “I sure do think you’re stupid, but what does that have to do with anything?” “Oh, no. You got your facts mixed up.” “You’re a self-righteous asshole.” “It’s filthy as fuck in here.” “Chicken doo-doo is getting all ground into my fuckin’ seduction dress!” “How can you eat in this dirty-ass heat?” “When that door opens and the little one walks in, I’m gonna slay him, cut his fuckin’ face off, and wear it as a mask.” “Sounds insane and not doable.”

“Serves you right, trying to argue with me.” “You know, literally, that is the thing that pisses me off the most about you. Every single time I suggest anything, you’re so eager to just jump down my throat, punch holes in my shit.” “Homeboy, like you’re not trying to always argue with me.” “You’re constantly acting like I’m gonna mess everything up.” “You do mess everything up.” “I will fucking kill you!” “I demand to be held captive in a private silo right now! ...Please!” “I wondered what that was, but I thought it rude to ask.” “Stop crying! Ain’t nobody gonna ransom you!” “That’s a good job with the voodoo dolls.” “Please, let me help. I’ll sacrifice my life and my body if need be.” “We’re gonna get more money than we know what to do with!” “I mean normally, yeah, I could, but you know, I am malnourished right now.” “Wanna see this? Freak athleticisms?” “Just do it. What’s wrong with you?” “Boy, your daddy didn’t leave you with much, did he?” “Your daddy threw money at you instead of raising you right.” “Fear of God is the best chance you got.” “If you don’t have the stomach for it, hell, I’ll do it.” “I don’t mind killin’. It ain’t nothin’ but a thing.” “Do your dumps, boy!” “He thinks that I don’t have it in me to hurt you.” “You don’t run nothing but your mouth.” “He chafes real bad, and a burnt rectal from cheap TP could make him very despondent.” “I bet no one’s gonna miss me.” “I don’t want my kids to be one of those kids that loses a parent like somebody in a fucking Disney movie.” “I don’t want my sons to be Bambis.” “I never want to be treated any differently than you guys just ‘cause I’m a lady.” “He ain’t following any sort of rules about ladies and mens.” “Kill the biggest one ‘cause he’s tough to handle.” “I know I get on your nerves, always riding you and shit. It’s just because I feel like somebody needs to make sure everything’s gonna turn out okay.” “You do get on my nerves, but if you get murdered, I promise to try and avenge you.” “Make sure that my wife and kids have a good life, watch after ‘em?” “Yeah, I feel like your kids are old enough to take care of themselves.” “I’m just gonna go into beast mode and start biting faces and dicks.” “If I die, please don’t remember me that way.” “Oh, god. Oh, shit. This is happening.” “I came all this way to bust you out of here.” “I’m sure that little dick would love to see me murdered.” “I mean, he might not mind you dead, but he wouldn’t want to see it happen.” “Did you call your mama and tattletale on us?” “Your brother there, he’s a big dope.” “You try stopping me, I’ll put another hole in your face.” “Kin don’t mean nothing.” “Family’ll turn on you on a dime. You gotta treat ‘em like you treat anybody else.” “Get the fuck out of the car.”

[illarian-rambling]

Thanks for the tag @mysticstarlightduck!

Oc in 15

Well, I'm still on my Honor's Outcasts kick, so let's get in protag number 3, Izjik (Ižik) Meautammera! For most of this book, she's the backseat driver to a godeater who's taken over her body, so a lot of this dialog is her talking to it. Telepathy is indicated with <>

<You are fucking filthy. You're wearing pajamas, you haven't eaten for nearly a day---hell, I'm not sure you've blinked in all that time! Tell me, End, do you feel a pain in you're gut? You feeling lightheaded? Cause you've got about three days till that feeling kills us both.>

<They’re Skysheerians, like that hot doctor chick back on Fabeail. Huh, I wonder how she's doing? Spirits, I faked at least five migraines back there just to see her. I reckon she thought i was a medical mystery. >

"Don't shit your britches, let me get some recon in first. ...Alright, I am done, but not because you told me or anything."

"My name is Izjik Meautammara and I'm not at all wanted by the wealthy Devaris family of Unity. They won't give you money for my safe and unconscious return."

"What I am is End's avatar. It speaks to me, it controls my actions when it wishes. I have killed spirits and Chosen under its command. Immortality shatters beneath my washava. I've come here to ask for your help in our ultimate endeavor; destroying the gods and all life on this planet. You, your kid, your dog---it'll all be dead and gone. So, uh, who's with me?"

<I fully believe you can and will take the both of us out with one chicken kebab.>

"Silly stories are my favorite."

<Are you ignoring me after threatening to kill my family? Cause that's real fucking mature.>

<Farewell, Chosen of the Nabafyrian ancestors. Kavity ek biryo torip. Atak viyu. I... I'll remember those words. A man deserves to have his last words remembered. A man deserves to not have his temple desecrated either. A man killed in cold blood deserves vengeance on his behalf.>

<A pair of boys, huh? I'm sure that was a handful. Were they in school? School can be a pain, even though it's nice to see your kids making friends. I remember when Twenari’s school hosted a dance; the poor thing was so nervous, but she managed to pull together a group of friends to go with and had a hell of a time. I'll bet your boys were brave too. I'll bet they had lots of friends.>

<Don't you fucking dare! Unless you want to be on bed rest for the rest of the year because you shattered my damn legs, you're going to climb your happy ass down that ladder like a normal person.>

"That's fine. All I need is a dagger. I don't care if that fucker's unkillable---I'll find a way."

"And stay out! Out of my head! Off this fucking planet! Come back and I'll kill the rest of you! I'll rip a bloody hole in the sky!"

"I razed her temple, killed her friends. Fucking hell, the least we can do is give her a ride."

"I, uh, don't know much about god-stuff. Maybe that makes me a shitty vessel of primordial evil, but that's ok."

I'll tag @haunted-orange @the-octic-scribe @hallowedfury and @autism-purgatory!

Have a bitchin day <3

[sleepersinger860]

Nightmare hell

(HE'S LAYING ON THE FUCKING NEWSPAPER,MY BOY DESERVES BETTER!)

Human/Past! Freddy Krueger x Reader(uses they/them pronouns)

Idea:Freddy gets nightmares about his past,so Y/N helps.

THIS STORY MENTIONS MURDER AND SHOWCASES ABUSE AND ALSO HAS CURSING IF YOU DON'T LIKE PLEASE LEAVE!!

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"FREDDY!!" A man called out his name in anger,holding a belt in his hand as he gritted his teeth,waiting impatiently for the boy named Freddy to come downstairs. A boy with dark auburn hair came down the stairs,bruises colored his face.His ocean blue eyes became dull as he came down the stairs waiting for his beatings.This boy is Frederick Charles Krueger,and his supposed guardian,Mr.Underwood was beating him for whatever no reason. "You,made my life a living hell and now,its time to take your medicine." Ah shit,its the fucking past,he would've tensed up,but why fear the pain when you can enjoy it,the pain was inevitable after all.The first belting came smack down on his face as he fell."Thank you sir,may I have more" the boy says,in a deadpan tone.He was taught to say this,but now he had enough.He smiled and chuckled,as the beatings got harder and harder.Freddy caught the belt,"You wanna know what's the secret to pain Mr.Underwood?" Freddy asked as he cocked his head slightly."What.Boy." Underwood had said slightly curious and now pissed off. "If you just stop,you feeling it,you start to enjoy it.(I literally forgot the fucking lines,I'm so fucking stupid😂) The boy smiled and stabbed Mr.Underwood with a razor,killing him.A man in the dreams smiled,"Good ol' memories" before the man got sent to the bad memories,his personal hell.

-

"SON OF A HUNDRED MANIACS! SON OF A HUNDRED MANIACS!"

Fuck.This was his most hated memory,his school life.He hated that place,more than life itself.He turned around meeting his former students and teachers.He hated them too,when he looked at them for help,they either laughed at him or scoffed and continued to do their work,Freddy always wanted to burn this school down to its fucking ground.The kids crowded around him as he stepped back,he fell through a hole,but at the end was a light as he fell through it.He woke up with cold sweat on his face as he got out of bed."Damn I need a smoke.." he said as he patted the bed.Where the fuck was Y/N,they're gone..THEY'RE GONE!!! Scenarios raced in Freddy's head as he thought the worse,he rushed down the stairs and yelled out,"Y/N!? Darling where are you?!" "I'm here Freddy,don't worry honey" Freddy sighed. "There you are" He said as he went over to you and wrapped you in a warm embrace."Hey Fred,something wrong?When your voice gets lower it means the something's wrong." Fred's eyes widened at the fact you could read him,but he wasn't surprised."I'm fine dear,why are you up?" he asked you,"Meh,I just woke up in the middle of the night,so I just pulled an all-nighter,plus I don't have work tomorrow.What about you Fred?" How could he explain his nightmares when it was the sole reason he killed all those kids of his bullies,he knew that you knew that he was a murderer and you were fine with it!You even hide bodies with him,but what if he thinks that you'll say its petty and stupid?He doesn't want to kill you..you value too much to him.

-

"Freddy?" Your voice brings him back to reality as you give a concerned look towards him,putting a hand on his shoulder as he looks at it and squeezes it."I'm fine dear,you do not need to worry about me.Let's get you to bed inste-" "Not until you tell me what's wrong with you!" You interrupted him.No one really interrupted him unless they wanted to go missing by next morning.But like he thought,you were valuable to him and he was shocked you were about him of all people.He stopped in his tracks and turned back to you in shock,but then he sighed."Well,if you insist,It was a nightmare"

-

"A nightmare? If you don't mind me asking Fred,was what it about?" "..." should I tell them? Maybe they'll understand,sure I will then. "Y/N,come sit down with me on the couch will you? I said as I patted the couch seat next to me. You came to the couch and sat next to me. "It was about my past memories,my most hateful ones,how it led me to be a murderer.It was dark and abusive,kids at my school made fun of me,my past "father" [I said using two of my fingers and flexing them up and down to show quotation marks] hated me and abused me.Reminds me of my mother and the three years i lived with her.So I went downstairs to take a smoke,but I couldn't find you,but now I did and now we're here.I stretched out my hands and put it around you."Wow,that must've been a lot,look I'm sorry that had to happen to you Fred but I'm here,and hey,even if the memories come back,I'll be here to keep ya comfort! they said as they kissed me on the lips."Thanks dear,now you want to watch a movie or kill?" "Movie,I wanna lay with ya in the moment!" They said as they laid against me,rubbing my chest.Y/N makes me feel and do things and they make me go so fucking crazy.That's why I love them.

[londonspirit]

I wonder what it says about a person* when their COMFORT ‘Go-To-When-Feeling-Shitty’ show is a fucking post-apocalyptic drama series that rips your heart out every fucking week and leaves you in shambles and sobbing on the floor for five (six in 24 hours) weeks straight! (Probably a field day for therapists!) 

-

-

* me, A PERSON is me

I did NOT expect this. NOT ONE FUCKING BIT!

I mean, I very often trust my Twitter (and Tumblr) when it comes to new stuff, new shows, new films. And I very often check them out - not always when they come out, but often enough (especially when MY shows are on hiatus don’t have an airdate yet).

And the hype was/is HUGE. I do understand that. Taking something that’s so beloved is always tough to get right. So people will love it WHEN they do. 

So yeah, I did see the promos and the tweets and since it’s one of the very few shows that are on SKY here at the same time as in the US, I was like, why the hell not.

Monday’s are my day off, so I didn’t think much when I hit ‘play’ on the first episode of The Last Of Us on it’s first day!!! 

I knew shit about it, NEVER played the game, and never heard about it before the show started to gain buzz.

Watched the first episode and was like ‘okay, yeah, looks okay enough, maybe a TAD too close to home these days, but hey, we made it more or less so lets see how they fare’

Watched the second one. Did a rewatch of the first one to better understand it. Impressed with how it was made, and I knew I would be sticking with it  - if only because it was something to watch on Monday mornings/noons.

And then the third episode came out. 

OH BOY!! 

I had an INKLING, maybe like wishful thinking when Bill fished Frank out of the hole. But I’m also too traumatized by too many shows to have actual HOPE of a queer episode. I full on expected the usual: some looks, some touches, some ‘im not queer’ excuses when the person is clearly interested/horny. 

HAHAHAHAHAHAAHAAAAAAAAAAA!!!! (And again, this all would give a therapist a fucking FIELD DAY with everyone!) 

That was the most beautifully written/executed episode since ‘You wear fine things well’!!! I’ve lost count of the rewatches, and I will root for every fucking award show that episode will be nominated for (yes, the rest deserves some love as well but THIS ONE IS THE FUCKING PINNACLE OF EPISODES!) 

After that I started listening to the podcasts going with the show. (I NEVER do that!) 

E4 came out and I fell a little more in love with Ellie and Joel - I can’t even say what it was: his NEED to protect her, her softening up beside him… 

I just knew it was soo different from what I expected from a show/pairing like that. Easier, maybe? Them opening up (sort of) to each other without all the usual tropes of prying it from their cold hearts and rigid souls?

And then Joel laughs. He tries soo very hard not to, but he can’t help himself. (Sidenote: I was curious as to how they translated that particular pun into German - they didn’t. They used a different one that (naturally) wasn’t as funny as the original one). 

It’s dark, it’s scary, it’s not safe. And he lies there in the dark, giggling with all he has about a stupid PUN. Oh my heart (Hell, I'm grinning TYPING this, just thinking about it so yeah…)

Safe to say: I was HOOKED! 

(also: EYE CRINKLES. That man has laughed A LOT in his life, and it shows. I leave it up to you whether i mean Joel or Pedro!) 

And then there was the sniper scene in E5!!! 

ARGH!!! I don’t even know why, but I fucking LOVE that scene soooo freaking much!!! 

Ellie, among all those Infected, KNOWING that Joel will have her back after only knowing him for a few days (?). 

Joel, watching her like a hawk, not wasting ammunition and only taking out anyone that comes too close to HER! 

Her BLIND trust that he watches over her and takes care of her. 

His laser focus on HER, not caring what happens to him, the deep NEED to protect her. 

GUH!!! If I could give out awards for spectacular SCENES, this 10, 15 minutes would get ALL THE FUCKING AWARDS!!! 

So yeah. Now Im sitting here, on this grey, wet Sunday morning, about 14 hours away from episode 6, eagerly awaiting to get my heart ripped out AGAIN, typing away the things I feel about a fucking VIDEO GAME ADAPTATION SHOW!!! 

*shakes head at self* 

(That happens when MY shows go on hiatus - I fall in love with all the GREAT NEW SHIT that HBO puts out! Soo soo happy that they already got a second season so no need to worry about that! Still miffed that OFMD had to wait and worry for soo long. Ah well.) 

And since it’s me, and I don’t do shit by halves, I'm also falling in love with the cast. 

Yes, mainly with Pedro because DUH. Have you seen the man’s interviews? His SNL epicness? THAT SMILE??!?! I dare you NOT get all giggly and gooey when he starts cackling out of the blue about his own silly jokes! And I'm not even trying to resist, it's too damn late for that anyways! He's too fucking charming, and these days anything that brightens my days is very welcome!

The love and adoration he has for Bella is adorable. Their chemistry is insane. She’s soo young and yet so mature, and he treats her like an equal which is amazing. 

And I can't wait to watch ALL THE INTERVIEWS running up to the show. I’ve got lots of catching up to do. 

(I’ve also listened to a few podcasts already, and DAMN, he’s another DAMN GOOD EGG. Humble and funny, VERY down do Earth despite the (quiet) success he’s been having for YEARS now! I’ve been making a list with all the things I need to watch… and I’ve seen him in soo many things already. Just never really noticed. *sighs heavily* 

Silly silly me!

POSSIBLE SPOILERS AHEAD

-

(Im also slightly [read: HORRIBLY SO] terrified because once you get into the show, you also get spoilers from the game -it’s unavoidable- and even though i do NOT know for sure (and won’t actively look for it) I fear for his fate. I KNOW they deviated before with Bill and Frank, and they may do it again with others, so I still have hopes, but the bits I’ve seen… well.

And i will prepare myself for the worst - just in case. Not that it’ll help much but I can lie to myself for as long as necessary.)

-

SPOILERS DONE!

So yeah. 

You know the drill by now: New Obsession coming up. 

Tags will be on posts so feel free to blacklist. 

Or join in. It’ll be heartbreaking and terrifying, beautiful and shocking, and I cannot wait for the last 4 episodes to drop. We’re in for a damn wild ride, so buckle up!!! 

[nate-walsh]

super relatable

So, I'm super scared of people. And most things. I assume that's obvious?

See, that's part of the problem right there. In addition to just the general blind screaming terror when I'm around another person, I also have a huge blind spot about my own social energy

It's like – teeth. I used to have pretty crooked teeth (they're still kinda crooked), and I was very self-conscious about them. And so I started paying attention to everyone else's teeth, to see where I stacked up, and just how poorly I was ranked, anyway. [I still do this. Crest Whitestrips are realtively cheap and available, I'm just sayin'.]

But, like, it's kind of the same thing socially. I know I'm bad at this, so I've been studying up. I've read books, and I pay very close attention to people's subtleties – tone of voice, emphasis, body language, eye contact. But, like, it's studied. right? I actually have reasonably good social insight and intuition, I think – I can honestly probably give you some legit authentically legit good advice, either through harsh experience or decades of over-processing. Just not at all remotely as it relates to myself.

I just feel inherently repulsive – like, people can feel my anxiety and fear, and just kind of organically stay away, possibly even out of kindness. But also, like, I'm a lot of work, and what are you getting out of that? I think if you can look past my rat's nest of neuroses, I actually have a number of pretty good things about me. It's just – there are much much easier people to connect with. And I don't reveal what's special about me until at least like the 12th separate encounter.

But also, I could be wrong about all of this, is the problem. People say I'm fine socially and that I'm capable enough and loved by some at the very least. I hear them, but believing them is another story.

I actually think I'm very lovable. In preparation for my move back to the Bay Area, I bought this book – 21 Days To Fall In Love With Yourself – because, yeah, that's the type of person I am. But, like, I think I'm pretty OK already, as it turns out. I've got tons of shit, but ultimately, I like what I'm doing and think I'm a pretty good get. I just deeply truly believe that no one else could like it, and they're barely tolerating me.

And, well, after a hypnosis show back in Vegas, I kind of went down a rabbit hole that night into Manifestation Tik Tok. And, like, I don't believe in the woo-woo magical part of manifestation, but I think there is actually a simple rational logic to it: If your reasons and beliefs are aligned with your intentions, then your energy and actions kind of follow. If you're really really focused on falling in love, and you believe you deserve to fall in love, and you know what you want out of love, turns out love comes out the woodwork. Because you're just throwing yourself at it properly. But if there's any discrepancy or misalignment, it gets all fucked up. You want love, but really it's to fill some emptiness in you, and you'll take what you can get, and you just want validation, you will probably get stuck with some turds. I got stuck with some turds (but also some very great ones – both teams hopefully know who they are). Or when you're around people, you self-fulfill your prophecies, and you're dark and complainy and unpleasant to be around. And who the hell wants that.

I bought a magic rock recently. Yeah, exactly, that's how bad things have gotten. But, like, Instagram was pushing pretty hard on this one particular rock, across multiple weeks and instances, and anyway, boy, wouldn't it be great if your problems could just be solved by a rock? But anyway, it turns out it's an intention thing, too. You're supposed to think about the rock, and imagine it's reshaping you or bringing our your best qualities, and just in doing so, you start to move in that direction, you get positive feedback, you move more in that direction, etc. I see through your shit, magic rocks. But also, absolutely correct.

But, like, there's a little, hm, prayer is the wrong word – invocation? – that you're supposed to say multiple times per day to ~ activate ~ the rock. And I was noticing today that it says something about achieving your goals. And I was like, hey wait, what goals?

I don't have a lot of deep intent, it turns out. [Unless it's a crush, then I'm a fucking serial killer.] But mostly, I don't have a lot of wants. I don't want more things – frankly, the things I have are already way too much and intense and complex. If anything, I would like the absence of things. A little peace and quiet. Room to breathe. Not too much to process or be scared of. I guess that feels like anti-goals to me – you should want an abundance, not an absence.

[But, that being said, and we shouldn't should anyway, a super abundance is also acceptable. I take drugs and listen to devastating fuzzy guitars, because that's kind of what it feels like inside all of the time, and so, you know, at least it's something relatable?]

I don't know. I need to sit down and write some goals. Get the magic rock aimed the right way. I guess I mostly feel reactive – I have the one basic goal of survival (mostly), and I'm just trying to keep enough on top of shit to keep going. There's no room for want, it feels like. It feels like. But, like many of my feelings, it's probably not accurate to the rest of the reality.

So yeah – gonna write some goals. This weekend. This weekend.

Manic-depression is funny. You honestly get just the best of both worlds. I have so much energy for shit like this – I could write you a million billion unproofread paragraphs of rumination – but the muster for anything, like, tangible? Use a dating app, go exploring bars, watch a movie, go for a run, shower, unpack my shit? Nah, b. I'm too tired. Work is too much. I'm worn out by the move and Cat almost dying. Etc. Etc. Etc.

I just wish I could change my core feelings about things. Like, I've laid so much intellectual framework around the feelings, trying to manage and understand and compensate for them, but I wish I could change the core thing itself. I guess it's like any disability. Like, if I didn't have a leg, I'd be super focused on the lack of a leg and why don't I have one and how dare the universe and what can I do to make up for this. Or allergies. Or cancer. It's just like – this one feels like it should be in my control, is what's annoying. I can't control my cell mutation or a terrible car accident that happened. But it's my own damn brain. I should be in charge, damn it.

Anyway, I'm coming to the realization that, sure, yes, I've been trying. But it's been kind of bad trying, because I'm fighting against my fear and negativity and this invented perception that people think I'm a chore and a downer and too much and not enough. They haven't been authentic efforts, and people can feel that inauthenticity, and it's gross, and they stay away. I have to get right by myself, and what I really want, and why I really want it. And if there's fear, well, the fear is the same part of the whole rest of my team, good and bad. The same way I got blue eyes and a weird thing on my foot it looked ever grosser to remove. It's all on the team, and we've just gotta work with what we've got.

[This is called Mindfulness-Acceptance Therapy, and I was definitely taught about it by my therapist, and did a whole book about it, and explain it to others. But in the moment of crisis, my mind goes blank, and all the little tips and tricks go out the window. I totally forgot about this shit until now. Yeah! We're a team! Exactly!]

I kind of want to be like the guy in Memento, where just key bits of mental health reminders are tattooed all over my body. "Gotta love everything, even if it's going to be gone someday." "Gotta have experiences." "Kindness can overcome anxiety, if you remember to do it." I actually do have the one tattoo – it's a symbol reminding me to stay positive. But you forget to look at them after a while.

I need routines. I need to get back in the habit of certain things. Meditating. Running. Guitar. Eating. The only thing I pretty much absolutely consistently do everyday is Duolingo, because I don't want to let down Dúo the Owl. I need a Dúo for all the basic functions of my life.

OK, but this isn't rumination. [Which I would define as overthinking that doesn't go anywhere.] This is level-setting and problem-solving and goal-setting. I'm kind of recognizing where I've been of late, and why. And self-pity isn't moving the needle one goddamn bit. These are my feelings, these are my handicaps, this is the hand I've been dealt. Deal with it. Everyone else does. Just do the stuff. Not in spite of the feelings, but with them, as part of your package.

Fwoof. Have I mentioned how tired I am, though?

It feels like I'm trying so hard to just be a person, and I'm not even any good at it. And just, I wasn't built for this. But again, self-pity isn't helping.

I just – I don't think I'm a very strong person. Like, if you grew up in an abusive household, some people are a mess, and they repeat the pattern. But some people work in opposition to that energy. Or they see it as the gritty surface that shaped them into the cool person they are now. That's what I need to be doing. It's just – I don't want to.

Like, think about zombie movies. Everyone is fighting so hard to stay alive. And it's like, why? It's so much work, and it's scary, and there's so little good left in the world, what are you still going for? Basic biological impulse. Well, my biology is fucked, and it tells me to give up and give in all the time.

Like, if we talk about manifestation, if we really go to the heart of who I am, I am not super committed to this reality. So, like, how is anything ever going to align? OK, no wait, this is rumination.

And just – I can't talk about it with anyone too much, because I already talk about it too much, and I'm a downer and a drip and a discomfort. And, well, no, this isn't me gearing up to off myself or anything. I've committed myself to hanging on. But, like, I'm going off of other people's faith on that. When your gut is constantly telling you unhelpful things, you can't trust your guts. And so what? You have to trust other people, when so many of them are liars or deluded or uh shall-we-say strategic. I don't know. It's really an issue of love. I have to love the people I love, and I have to believe they love me, and I have to trust them when they say that I'm OK and I'm loved and life is worth it and dying before my time would be a waste and a devastation. I just wasn't raised very faithful.

It's not that everything's terrible. It's just a lot of it IS bad, and I can't help but notice. I'm bad at thinking around it or compartmentalizing or distracting. There are good things, and I try to be grateful for them, because that's supposed to help. It's just – a lot of work for the good things, and are they really that good that they're worth the effort?

Anyway, I'm fine. The random dice roll in my brain that is my daily mood just came up snake eyes today. Maybe tomorrow will be a lucky one. Maybe you can load the dice.

Well, I'm not editing this right now, that's for damn sure. Unless people somehow still be checkin' they RSS feeds, this will probably go unnoticed. I don't know. I can't write freely about things. But yes. I absolutely can. It doesn't have to be public. I just kind of want it to be.

[bytedykes]

Ask game anon. Im stupid. Five/Eleven questions 2, 3, 8, 9 and 30 djdjdjcn

kajdkss no worries anon i felt that

im gonna do both <3 five first

2. When I think I truly started to like them (or dislike them, if you've sent me a character I don't like)

ok see the thing about five is that he is such a compelling character to me. INSANELY compelling. i mean come on, kid who lost himself in the literal apocalypse at THIRTEEN and his whole family was dead, and then he spent DECADES working his ass off and then working as an assassin all to get back and save his family but when he does he fucks up and is an old man stuck in a child's body? i ate that shit RIGHT UP. he's a bitch he's an old geezer he's a cranky weirdo he kills people and his morals are fucked as all hell. i LOVED five right away he was so cool

HOWEVER. HOWEVER. if u were in tua fandom circa 2019 u know what a hell hole it was. u know that no one could be normal about any fucking thing. the amount of victim blaming accusations at the siblings were ummm. yeah. it was hostile back then and to some degree it still is probably adkdsjds. so after a while that kind of ruined five for me a little bit because. no one GOT him u know? no one got him right and it was frustrating + all the five stans were the weirdest most rabid people around back then. so that began to put me off the character as a whole. plus aidan gallagher was being so rampantly silly (derogatory) back then too

but actually i do still like five. i think that his story is really interesting and his love for his family is so integral to the central plot of the whole show and he deserves to retire and have a chill relatively normal life. i didnt care for season 3 but even after all that yeah he should get to just hole up somewhere and idk do normal old man things. also five is funny as hell like im sorry but 13 year old boy losing his absolute shit 24/7 because he's actually a 58 year old adult man with the worst life in the world is never NOT gonna be funny

3. A song that reminds me of them

UNIVERSE EXPANDED BY FRANZ FERDINAND......... it is SO fivecore it is so him in the apocalypse trying to get back home. especially the parts that go "I'll meet you coming backwards, Yes I'll meet you coming back, When the universe has expanded, Time will contract, You'll come back" like . ARGHHHH. also not so much anymore but in my prime of tuaposting "lucky ball & chain" by they might be giants made me think of five and dolores every time without fail

8. Your favorite outfit of them

ok i actually do love fives s3 outfits. like it may not have been as good as the first two seasons but it DID go off with finally letting five wear things that arent a plain suit or an academy uniform. i love his stupid hat i love it when he rocks up to the family gathering decked out in old geezer swag

9. Your least favorite outfit of them

GRRR THE UNIFORM... listen i KNOW its iconic i KNOW he spends two seasons wearing it but AGHH FREE HIM!!!!!!! FREE HIM

30. The funniest scene they had?

every other scene he's in is so insanely fucking funny i cant pick. lets see tho umm big fan of when in s2 he rocks up to elliott's house and starts acting like he owns the place, big fan of his return scene in s1 where he's making the world's worst sandwich and calls diego stupid for not understanding quantum physics, also i liked the whole worlds biggest ball of twine subplot in s3. OH ALSO when he was making his list of who he needs to kill in s1 and luther was like "thats murder you cant do that" and he was like "oh my fucking GOD, luther, grow the fuck UP" there are so many fucking things wrong with him

OK THIS GOT LONG so ill put el in a separate post <3

[summaryi]

A Court of Mist and Fury - Sarah J. Maas (Book 2)

oh my heart

SPOILERS BELOW

MY HEART FUCKING BROKE. YOU KNOW WHEN IT BROKE. YOU FUCKING KNOW.

IT BROKE WHEN TAMLIN LOCKED HER IN THE HOUSE.

GOD FUCKING DAMN

OKAY SO

Feyre pre-Amarantha needed her Beauty and the Beast moment. But she went through fucking SHIT in Amarantha’s bullshit trials and DIED and CAME BACK TO LIFE and Tamlin, I SWEAR TO GOD I KNOW YOU’RE FUCKED UP TOO, LIKE GODDAMN, A LOT HAS HAPPENED, YA BOI NEEDS THERAPY

WHERE’S THE FUCKING FAE THERAPIST

IT SURE AS HELL ISN’T IANTHE

AND HE

WELL

HE’S FUCKED UP TOO I GET IT

THEY’RE JUST

THEY’RE JUST NOT COMPATIBLE WITH EACH OTHER AT THIS MOMENT

AND IT

FUCKING HURTS TO SEE

I don’t doubt that he loves her. I don’t doubt that she loves him. They’re also - at this point - so very different than when they first met. 

Tamlin needs to rebuild (or try to) whatever vision he has for the Spring Court. He wants to pull inwards and deal with whatever lies outside the Spring Court’s borders with an overabundance of caution.

Feyre cannot look inwards, or else the fuckery she’s still recovering from and processing will pull her into its black hole.

God. It hurt so much when he. Stupid bubble. You know.

And Lucien. Fuck. I liked Lucien a lot more in Book 1. I just feel like. I don’t know. It’s a hard situation for him, too.

I love Rhys. I’M SIMPING UWU

The shit he went through with Amarantha. IT FUCKING HURTS ME TO THINK OF BABY RHYS, CASSIAN, AND AZRIEL GROWING UP TOGETHER. THE SHIT THEY WENT THROUGH. THE LOVE AND TRUST THEY HAVE IN EACH OTHER. GOD.

I do love that Velaris, for me, in MY PERSONAL READING EXPERIENCE, was mostly townhome. It truly is the secret getaway where Rhys and his Inner Circle get to be themselves. Not High Lord, or General, or whatever.

Honestly, I didn’t understand why Feyre was mad that Rhys didn’t tell her they’re mates. Like, when did he have time girl. WHEN DID HE HAVE A MOMENT. WHAT WOULD HAVE BEEN CONVENIENT FOR YOU?

When he ran into you at Calamnai? HuH???? When the only thing you wanted was Tamlin and you weren’t even able to tell him you loved him?

Oh, Under the Mountain? I’m sorry, when you were busy trying not to die and Rhys was trying his damndest to keep you alive???? Oh, by the way, when you were doing all that shit for Tamlin? Should he have told you then?

Or what about when you were reeling from trauma and trying to piece yourself and your world back together? When you couldn’t eat or sleep? Should he have been like hey howdy hot stuff, it’s me, ya boi - we mates - see ya next month!

Or when he whisked you away from your wedding TO TAMLIN? yEAAH, that would have gone so well. SO LIKE. I DON’T KNOW. IS IT JUST ME. I DON’T KNOW WHY SHE’S SO UPSET HE DIDN’T SAY ANYTHING SOONER BECAUSE IT SEEMS TO ME THAT THERE WASN’T EVER REALLY A GOOD FUCKING TIME FOR THAT KIND OF CONVERSATION

Not a big deal, actually, she gets over it pretty quickly. Am I the weird one, for not understanding why she gets mad? Not to like. Invalidate her feelings. You do you girl. Your emotions are valid. But also you are a fictional character and I’m dumping my own emotions and thoughts here. So like. I don’t get it. Like, he wasn’t telling you but also. When could he have. It’s not like he was like “hey i’ve been hiding a really big secret about like - how you can undo every bad thing that happened to you and there are no negative consequences.”

I hated that Rhys shared Velaris with the human queens. I hated that. I hated that. I get it. I understand it. It hurt me. IT HURT ME.

AND TAMLIN’S FUCKING BETRAYAL. HE SOLD THEM OUT TO HYBERN FOR WHAT? FEYRE? DOES HE ok so like

me? projecting? maybe. tamlin = fictional? absolutely

does he still love her (purely) or does he just want her back in this weird desperate hope that once she’s back everything will click back into place and give him the life he thinks he deserved and wanted and his happily ever after will occur and the rest of eternity will be happily ever after

So like

ya

what da fuck boi

I can see the angle of “keep your enemies closer” and “i would’ve been able to spy on Hybern’s plans and movements if I let them use my lands” but also like

dis some fucked up shit and idk if your reasoning is that sound my guy and is the price worth it and like - you are dealing with HYBERN here they are FUCKED UP, bro, like come ON, is any deal you make with them going to be worth it fr fr sheeeeesh

Lucien being like Elain is my mate kinda like

out of left field for me

very you get a mate, and you get a mate, and you get a mate, everybody gets a mate energy and i like

idk

it was a lot

i want a hot Fae mate too T_T (NOT THAT MY CURRENT PARTNER ISN’T FABULOUS I LOVE THEM VERY MUCH but like also Fae magic isn’t my current reality and i wish it was)

Feyre, High LaDY OF THE NIGHT COURT?

wig SNATCHED

i love this for her

fuck it UP, Rhys!!!!!!!!!!!! we stan a woke hot boi

[flatstarcarcosa]

"I thought I'd find you here."

The voice causes Reese to turn. In the moonlight, and out of the corner of their eye, for a single moment he looks so much like his father it makes their heart skip a beat and their brain cease to function.

Seeing the expression on their face, Zuko raises an eyebrow. "What?" he asks.

"Nothing," they turn back to the hot spring, feet dangling in the warm water. "When'd you get so damn tall? Seems like just yesterday I was taller than you."

Zuko snorts. "I'm going to be honest, I don't think you were ever taller than me."

"Hey now," says Reese, leaning back and looking up at him, "you wouldn't be the first fire lord I tried to drown in this spring."

He says nothing for a moment. "Can I ask you something?"

"Why is it when people lead with that it means they're gonna do it anyway, so you may as well prepare yourself?"

"Why... didn't you ever kill him?" he asks. "If anyone had ample opportunity over the years...it was you."

"This was such a pleasant conversation fifteen seconds ago," says Reese.

"I'm serious," says Zuko.

"I know you are," they say with a sigh. "But I don't have an answer for you. If we're asking, why didn't Aang kill him in the end?"

"Because Aang's not a murderer," he says, unfaltering. "He never would have, no matter how much it was deserved."

Reese barks a laugh, grinning with teeth. "But I am, is what you're not saying."

"Are we supposed to pretend you've haven't killed better people for less?"

"My own survival was never less," they say, sharper than intended.

Zuko pauses, and finally plops down next to them. "That's not what I meant," he says. "You know I've never held your past against you. If I did, I wouldn't be able to have you on my council because I wouldn't be able to trust your advice."

"Still not your most popular decision since coming to power," they drawl. "Everyone either thinks I'm a spy for your dad and whatever schemes he's cooking up to get out of his hole, or they think I'm just the fool he kept around for amusement."

"Neither of which are wholly wrong," he says Zuko, "just as they're not right, either."

In fact, Reese has been spying in regards to Ozai. This many years after the war, they are now the only person who reliably engages him in conversation. Solitude, and the enduring horror of being reduced to naught but a normal man in a cage has made him overly eager for feedback on any idle thought that crosses his mind.

All of which Reese reports back to Zuko. Usually the former fire lord's rants and ideas aren't more than bluster; still, it eases him to have regular updates about what his father manages to get up to from inside his cell.

"It sounds exaggerated to say, but I think about it every day," they finally say. They lean back on their hands, looking up at the stars. "Being here full time, I'm acutely aware of every instance I could have killed him inside these walls. Fuck, if we wanna get to the bare bones of it, I could go do it right now."

"Not without my authorization, of course," Zuko says lightly, nudging them with an elbow.

Reese cuts him a glance. "Boy, your daddy could barely authorize shit when it came to me, and if you think you got a chance in hell of taking over that leash, you got hit in the head too many times."

Silence falls. Reese fishes out a cigarette, lights it with a finger tip. They get off a single inhalation before Zuko plucks it from their hand, dips in the spring, and flicks the waterlogged remains towards a trash can.

He misses.

Reese laughs.

"Is that why you could never do it?" he asks, now also tilting to look up at the sky. "Because that's how you saw yourself, how you still see yourself? The attack dog at the end of his leash, lashing out at everything that comes near, but too conditioned to bite back?"

Maybe, they think.

"I never knew if it would change anything," they say. "I've done enough assassination to know how destabilizing a power vacuum can be. What if I'd done it, and with you still banished, Azula took over?"

"Horrifying to consider," he admits.

"I never ascribed to the fates, or destiny," says Reese, "but I do wonder if maybe things had to go down like they did. That it really was up to Aang." They pause. "I think, sometimes, the madness that comes from not fully knowing why I could never go through with it is like... my penance for my hand in things. I made the damn bed and now I have to lie in it whether it's charred and bloody or not."

Zuko hums. He stretches, and then stands.

"I guess we'll never know for sure," he says. "But I do know one thing..."

"Which is?" They turn to look up at him, and once again, the angle and shadows make him look so similar to his father that they feel their heart jump back to their throat.

"You can always ask the new fire lord for a new bed," says Zuko. He smiles, and winks at them, and the resemblance vanishes. "Good night, Reese."

He turns to leave, pausing long enough to pick up the discarded cigarette and deposit it into the trash can.

"Night, kid," they say as the door quietly slides shut behind him.

fic incoming in rb when i finish it i don't wanna ping the search