#my blog will also get revamped too...at some point lol

[simsreaper]

Hiatus Announcement(long post sorry!! I like to yap) (TLDR at the bottom)

Hey yall, is it too late to say happy new year?? 🤨 I'm going on hiatus for some time, not entirely sure how long tbh. I've been wanting to fix my game and do a whole cc clean out of both mods and cc(especially cc) and give my game a good refresher so it can run good and decent and making playing it enjoyable. The simulation lag I experience sometimes pisses me off. I've also been playing a lot of sims 2 for the past 2 months and recently got back into sims 4 after updating the game and my mods so if you still want to see me active, feel free to check out my tagged blogs in my pinned post. I will still be posting on this account here and there(aka reblogging other people's posts) but I won't be doing any posts of my own until I'm satisfied with the state of my game.

I also want to add that I am officially retiring all my saves EXCEPT FOR THE HIX CHALLENGE, I literally can not abandon Pandora like that and I love her and the kids way too much. I'll most likely end up adding another save(JUST ONE, I SWEAR IT), it'll probably be a random legacy challenge.

Unfortunately, I'm most likely retiring my story saves, Wild Wild West and New Plum Grove, either forever or for the definite future. I wanted to work on the storytelling and plan them both out better and also make poses of my own that fit my stories better but never got around to spending time to do that so those will definitely not be coming back anytime soon(or ever???). My BACC is most likely going on hiatus but Cosmic Legacy and DITFT are definitely being retired, I am just bored with those saves and it's been quite some time so I don't think the energy is coming back for those. Maybe in the future I'll restart them.

I've also been wanting to redo my editing style for posts to be similar to how I edit my sims 4 gameplay and also how other simmers edit their sims 3 & 4 gameplay so expect when HIX comes back that it'll look a bit different in posting style than before.

I'm also back in school now and it's my last semester so I'm definitely going to be pretty busy and have low energy for going cc shopping and doing mod updates...but I'm going to hope that I'll be back by the end of the year! Fingers crossed!

TLDR: Going on hiatus for an indefinite time, I'll still be active on this blog with reblogging posts. My game needs the biggest refresh ever and I'm starting over with CC and some mods.

[uselesssomebody]

𝕤𝕥𝕠𝕠𝕕 𝕦𝕡 - post!d&w!logan howlett x reader

complete masterlist | logan howlett - coming soon!

words || 𝟚.𝟡𝕜

summary || in which the reader gets stood up, and logan consoles her - in more than one way

a/n || self indulgent :)) guess what happened to me guys !!

➵ i know i've been literally dead but i may be back! not sure fully yet lol but i've missed writing. shocker, college is in fact hard and i've spent a whileeee adjusting. that also means my writing is prob a bit shit here but i just wanted to get this out

➵ first time writing logan - i watched deadpool & wolverine and oh my godddd this man can fucking get it. haven't watched the x-men movies so i kinda had to guess his accent, sorry if it's inconsistent. this is set after the events of deadpool & wolverine

➵ shall i revamp the blog theme guys? i don't have any ideas but idk if you guys are bored by it haha

➵ send me requests if you have ‘em. enjoy!

warnings || fluff/smut/a wee bit of angst

➵ fingering

➵ age gap (not a plot point)

(tell me if i miss anything)

having 2 people in a one bedroom apartment was already cramped. 3 is insane. as much as wade tried, he felt bad for poor hugh's - *cough* logan's back for constantly swapping between the dingy couch and the mattress on the floor to sleep.

and the wolverine was never the type to ask for help, it pissed him off. they had been nearly atomized together for christ's sake!

another room on the floor had opened up, and as much as wade wanted to kick blind al off to that room instead, he knew the old lady wouldn't be able to pay the whole rent herself, and he had to make sure she didn't use too much fun-time sugar under fox's watchful eye. luckily, neither did logan have to live alone, as wade was quick to find a down-on-her-luck college girl who needed cheap rent.

so, now wade's stuck with an ornery old woman, and pretty-boy - well, man - logan got to have a cute girl as his roommate. just his luck. he checked in on his fellow invincible often, and as much as logan didn't talk, wade knew he didn't mind her one bit.

she tried to be a good roommate - cook breakfast for the both of them, pick up a sweet treat for him too if she was getting one for herself, and trying to keep to herself with the studying. but she couldn't help the little crush that she had on her roommate. like, come on.

older, mature, mysterious, downright yummy? what's a girl to do? she kept it to herself, but seeing him smirk or chuckle when she realizes she's accidentally been staring at him in that leather jacket or shirtless going to bed. at least she doesn't make him uncomfortable, but it feels pretty dismissive - how he sees her as such a fucking kid that he can't even take her attraction seriously.

logan took it very fucking seriously.

every day was a mental challenge - truly, god gives his worst temptations to his strongest soldiers. the liquor on his breath was still strong, not now because his life was ruined, but rather because his mind was.

this cute, young girl who looked at him like he was the solution to all her relationship issues, like his old-man body was good enough to fucking eat? it was a miracle that he hadn't taken her. and she just looked so beautiful as she got ready for bed, or as she bobbed her head to music while she studied, or as she buzzed around the small kitchen to cook her third cheap pasta for the week.

it didn't help how she'd always ask how he is, buy him little things to keep his mood up, and always offered to take the couch. he'd rather eat glass than let her sleep on the couch, but nonetheless, she offered every day.

fuck. it was impossible to sleep when she was just behind the wall, in her fucking shorts and tank. unbelievable. he needed a fucking drink.

some nights, he'll come home in the evenings to an empty house. it's rare - she doesn't have too much money to go out, but when she does, she'll usually warn him she'll be home late. he always makes sure to stay awake until she gets home, and even had the privilege of going into downtown to pick her up after the friends she was with had managed to lose her. she had hiccuped, tearing up in embarrassment as she watched him approach her drunk form leaning on a tree outside. she had thought the stern arch of his brow was because of her calling him so late, when really, he was just angry that her friends had the audacity to put her in such a dangerous situation.

"it's windy." he grunts, and she looks down at her short, strappy dress, ashamed.

"s-sorry. we drove here." she tries to explain, and logan relents, brow going from angry to grumpy.

"yeah." he finally sighs, walking with her back to their place. seeing her hands go to cradle her elbows, he places his leather jacket over her shoulders, and she swallows thickly.

"you don't have to-" but he's lighting a cigar as she speaks, in just his wifebeater he'd been lounging in. she decides to shut up, silent until they reach the house.

he helps her in and then waits outside to finish the cigar, and after she gets in, she sighs softly, carefully placing the jacket down. she starts trying to make logan some dinner as a thank-you, but passes out at the dinner table half-way through. luckily, she hadn't had the stove on, and logan's heart melts as he sees her, halfway through mixing a few eggs, head lolling off the chair as she drools a little.

cutie, he thinks, separating her fingers from the fork and bowl, and carrying her into the bed. as he tries to set her down, her fingers clutch his arm, and a small, sleepy whine leaves her.

logan's not a man to blush, but hearing that little beg for him to stay makes him fucking burn. he looks down at her, a hand running through his hair, and he gently tries to let her down again. she just holds on tighter, groaning, "warm..." a little mumble escapes her, and logan huffs. of course it's not that she wants him, she's just cold. he sighs, sitting down and letting her cuddle into his arm.

he had planned to leave once she'd passed out, but it was late, and he was old, so he had ended up just sleeping next to her anyways. the sun's rays the next morning pierce his eyes, and he sighs softly, waking up next to her. he swallows thickly, watching the way the sun hits her form, bathing her exposed skin in orange and amber.

the moment is broken by her startling awake. for a moment, she sighs happily, thinking that this was just a continuation of her dream about logan, where she wakes up next to him after a night of great sex, and they both live happily ever after. then she blinks.

his bicep feels bigger than in the dream, his face looks a little more real, he's- real?!

she squeaks, immediately sitting up.

"logan?"

"don't go getting any ideas in your head." he immediately defends, sighing. "you called me last night."

she bites her lip.

"you took me home?"

"put you in bed too. then ya fucking kept me on ya like a boa." he's joking, but she still struggles to tell between his grumpy voice and his joking grumpy voice.

"fuck, i'm really sorry, must have ruined your night-" she starts, and he gets up, ruffling her hair.

"it's okay. better knowing you were safe." it leaves her a little star struck, especially when he then goes to continue making the omelette she had tried to make last night.

he's cooking for her for once and she gets such a nice view of his broad back in that wife-beater. maybe things aren't that bad.

knowing how she always texts if she's out late, he's a bit confused to come home to an empty room. he huffs, trying not to panic, but he can't help how much he care for the girl. he leans back, lounging on the couch.

as an hour passes with no texts, he's about to get up and ... do something. look for her, call her - something.

just then, she walks through the door, purse dropping on the floor with a thud.

that's an attitude he hadn't seen before. she looks like a deer in headlights when she notices that he is in fact home.

"o-oh." she blinks, quickly picking up the purse, as if to console it. "wade said you weren't home." logan raises a brow, a little curious why the other man would say that.

"long day?" he finally comments, and she breathes out.

"shit day." she corrects. logan's brow furrows.

"hmm." he murmurs, stretching his arm out over the back of the couch. an open invitation. she hesitates but... he looks warm.

conservatively, she sits beside him, hands in her lap. she's not even paying attention to whatever channel logan has on as background noise.

theres maybe 5 solid minutes of silence.

finally, she sighs.

"i'm gonna go to bed." she murmurs softly, getting up. logan wraps his fingers around her palm.

"talk to me." he mumbles gruffly, and she knows that's a pretty big first step for him. she bites her lip, sitting back down, and takes a deep breath.

"got stood up." it's little more than a whisper, and she feels a pout forming on her lips, which she tries to reverse, to little avail. it's silent again, and she wonders if logan heard her.

of course, he did - spending a moment processing who the hell would stand her up.

"i'm sorry." his rough fingers press over hers, comforting, and she can't help but sink more into him than the couch cushions.

it feels nice, more right than the kisses she'd shared with the guy she'd been seeing.

"whatever." she tries to mumble, trying not to show her hurt.

"he's an idiot." his hand slips around her shoulders, and he can feel her pulse quicken.

"i'm an idiot."

"he's an idiot." he repeats sternly. "who was he?" she bites her lip.

"some... guy." logan suppresses a scoffing bark.

"not if he's got you like this." he looks down at her. she's ashamed to look up at him.

"i don't know... i just really liked him. i thought he liked me too." she feels a tear slip out, and logan's fist squeezes in anger as he sees her quickly wipe it away.

"he should be singin' his prayers that he even got your attention." that makes her giggle - strained, but there. he prefers the sound to her defeated mumbles. "look at me." he murmurs, taking her chin and angling it to face him. his eyes travel down to the cute dress she'd put on for her date - low cut, perfectly form fitting, "he's a fucking idiot." he whispers, hand slipping down to her waist.

"yeah?" she whispers, significantly less focused on aforementioned 'fucking idiot' now.

"yeah, princess." he murmurs, hand gently running up and down her side. he knows he shouldn't, but he can practically feel the jump of her heart at the endearment. "you like that? princess?" his voice almost has a teasing lilt, and her lids flutter at the difference in tension from 2 minutes ago.

"a little." her face looks so bashful, so unsure. after that depressing feeling of not being wanted - god, he wants to pull her out of that so bad.

"should be treated like a princess." she shifts imperceptibly closer.

"got a guy who'll do that for me?" she teases, and logan scoffs softly.

"you know i do." his voice carries that gruffness even with how quiet he is, speaking into the small space between their lips. "you know, princess."

she breathes out shakily, leaning forward, when logan pulls her chin, pressing his lips to hers. she whimpers softly, finding her hands and placing them at his nape, not wanting to let go. it's not rough, but needy, his other hand slipping to the hem of her dress on her thigh. she hums into his lips, as he pulls away, a little breathless.

"don't - we shouldn't." he whispers, and a pout graces her lips - a proper one.

"why?"

"yer upset." he sighs, but doesn't move away.

"about?" she says playfully, having fully forgotten about her evening; she'd been waiting for this for so long. he lets out a gruff bark of a laugh, pulling her closer, and she adjusts, getting on his lap.

"come on, bub." he scolds again, and she hums, leaning down to kiss him.

"please?" she whispers, against his lips. he groans.

"jesus, what're y'doin' to me?" his head tilts back, and she giggles, exhilarated that she's got him like this. her hands trail down his arms - god, his arms - tracing the veins, somehow always bulging, as she gently leans forward again, kissing him. this time, theres a bit more tongue, and he pulls her closer roughly, gnashing their teeth together. she moans softly into his mouth, fingers finding his rough palm. he grips them tight - not enough to hurt, but just enough to show that he's holding back.

"i'm not made of glass." she teases, and he scoffs softly.

"i could snap ya'n half." his mumble finds his way back into her lips, and she has to control herself to not showhow much the little quip affected her.

"maybe i want you to."

"jesus." he flips her over, onto her back, "got this pretty little dress on, fuck, that guy's an idiot." his hands travel down her thighs, and she bites her lip, a massive grin on her face.

"you like it?" she murmurs softly, playing with the strap of her dress.

"whadya think?" he huffs, and she giggles.

"and if i told you i got it for you?" logan presses a hot kiss to the side of her thigh.

"i'd tell ya to get a dozen more." his lips move up her thigh slowly, and she lets out a shaky breath.

"god, logan." her whispers of his name are like music to his ear, and he leaves a small bite by the hem of her dress.

"gotta tell me if i hurt you." he mutters, more seriously, and she smiles.

"only fun if it hurts."

"i'm serious, princess." she relents.

"i'll tell you." he sighs in content, gently riding her dress off.

"this okay?"

"more than okay." she helps him, pulling the dress over her hips, her lacy panties peeking under the fabric. when he spends just a bit too long staring, she giggles, "you can touch." she affirms, and he barks out a gruff lap.

"could'a guessed that much." his fingers trace the hem of them, travelling down her inner thighs. her breath hitches, and she gently rolls her hips, desperate for more.

"please, logan." she whispers, breathing a bit labored. though he'd love to tease, he's getting desperate too.

"gotta tell me what ya want, princess." he murmurs, and she bites her lip, almost shy again. it's cute.

"touch me?" she murmurs, almost like it's a favor she's asking. he kisses her thigh again, before gently peeling the panties off. he lets out a soft groan at how slick she is, fingers catching her arousal as they travel down her slit. she lets out a shocked gasp - practically a moan - and he fucking loves it.

`'need them, princess?" he smirks at her, and she nods, almost pathetically.

"god, i do." he obliges, gently prodding her entrance with his middle finger. he slips in with little resistance, but jesus, he can feel how tight she is.

"fuck, yer gonna be the death of me, princess." he groans softly, and she lets out a breathy giggle.

"thought that doesn't happen to you?"

"well, never had a girl as pretty as you." he murmurs, slipping another finger in. she flushes, back arching as his fingers do, body warm as she rocks her hips in time with his ministrations.

"faster?" she begs softly, and he could never say no to those big doe eyes. he starts moving faster, her slick absolutely coating his fingers, and she moans louder, hips moving in a more stuttered rhythm.

"like that?" that teasing lilt is in his voice, and she nods furiously.

"j-just like that-" she stammers, mind already foggy, "god, i'm close, please don't stop."

"not in a million years, princess." she lets out a loud moan as she can feel herself unraveling, the orgasm so powerful that her thighs shake around him as she cums. she pants as he helps her ride through it.

"good girl, just like that, princess," he consoles, "so fuckin' pretty for me, ain't cha?" he grins, as she starts to come down. as her breathing slows, so too do his fingers, before slowly sliding them out of her. he gently rubs her clit, just to see her jolt at the stimulation, before chuckling, and placing his soaked fingers onto his tongue.

she lets out another moan as she watches him, with lidded eyes.

"i'll cum again." she warns, playfully, and he's gleeful. she tastes like fruit.

"i plan on it, princess." she feels her cheeks warm.

"that's the hardest i've cum in a while." she admits shyly.

"sounded like it." he teases, but before they can get anything else out, there's banging on the wall that connected them to wade and blind al.

"these walls are paper thin!" al's screech sounds a little traumatized, and her scolding make both her and logan whip around, embarrassed.

"for once in my life, i agree with her! shut up, lovebirds, i wanna fucking sleep!" wade's voice is equally exasperated.

there's silence, until she calls back a bashful, "sorry!" she turns to logan, almost laughing, but still flushed with shame. "maybe we should stop. he scoffs.

"nah, just means i gotta teach ya to be quiet."

safe to say, she's not thinking at all about her date tonight.

[justalost4girl]

Not a lost girl anymore, but I’ll still keep the nickname lol

Hi everyone,

I know I’ve been absent and stopped posting for a while, and I think you all deserve an explanation. The truth is, I recently had a heart attack. My heart stopped, I was resuscitated, and I also found out I have heart failure. Even though I can count on one hand who knows this in my personal life, I felt the need to share it with you. When a writer abandons their work, I used to get worried too, so I understand how you might feel.

Here, no one really knows me personally, so I feel more comfortable opening up. When your heart stops, you start paying attention to areas of your life that you’ve neglected. Back when I was writing, I was drowning in depression and burnout. The depression came from ending a cycle with someone who was very important to me, and the burnout from overworking myself in college, almost to the point of drowning in it all. Well, I did drown, in a way. Having a heart attack on the street, with no one around, waking up in a hospital with a broken phone full of notifications from worried people, because bad news travels fast… it changes you. One day, my heart will stop, and I want this blog to remain in everyone’s memory. I didn’t get a set date like they do in the movies, but I hope I have plenty of time to read and share my stories with you all.

Today, I’m doing much better. I’m getting treatment, exercising, prioritizing myself, and I’ve finally healed from that ending. I had promised to love that person until my last heartbeat, and well, after my heart stopped, I feel like I fulfilled that promise and freed myself. It hurt to go through this without her, but I’ve learned to let go of choices I didn’t make.

That said, I’ll be finishing my fanfics soon and will be revamping the site. I have some older works that I’ll be revising, and now I’ll be giving more attention to my writing, without just pouring my pain into the characters. By the end of the year, I plan to finish everything I’ve started and put my promises into action.

Thank you to everyone who read this far. I hope your journeys are light and filled with happiness.

With love, Nicolle (yep, that’s my name :) )

[seeyouonsaturn]

Hello! I've recentlyl found your blog and it's made me so nostalgic. You've managed to find fanart that I thought was lost to time. I was in love with prowl back in 2009 and these days he's a platonic f/o! I ship to optimus and bulkhead now! I'd very much like to hear about your oc! (selfshipping-haven)

AW THANK YOU!! God yeah he was my first real love tbh. I'd had little baby crushes before but Prowl unlocked things in me I didn't even know I had when I discovered TFA in 2011. I didn't even really speak English back then, I didn't understand half of what those guys were even saying but he was everything to me.

I haven't thought about transformers in over a decade until I recently made a new friend who's a fan, and at some point TFA came up and I sort of mentioned that I used to be in love with Prowl, so then one thing led to another and I looked him up just for nostalgia and oh. I remember him. We were in love. Turns out those feelings never left. So here I am.

Thinking back now I realized that there's a lot of things about my personality/me as a person that connect back to Prowl, because kid me wanted to be more like him, and I did, but I completely forgot where it all started. I do love that I succeeded to grow into a person he would like, it means so much to me. Coming back to TFA honestly feels like coming home. Returning to my roots.

Anyway, excuse the autistic rambling <3 I much appreciate this ask, it means a lot that someone actually cares enough to ask!! Looking at your blog though, I don't think you'd like Trixie very much, since her ship/story is pretty fucked up lmao.

I have two OCs I ship with Prowl (HEAR ME OUT LOL) mom said i could have two Prowl ships

So. The first one, Ash, I made when I was 13, and they were a very made-by-autistic-child-esque overpowered self-insert. They had a different name and gender back then because I did too but the concept remains sort of the same: Prowl falls in love with a human, all is good for a while, and then there is an accident that results in Ash nearly dying, becoming techno-organic to save their life, and sporting a huge scar. I thought it was awesome, then later decided it was cringe, and now I realized it's actually based af so I revived them. I am cringe but I am free. Ash is great.

Enjoy a preview. Kitty cat. I love cats more than anything and this is a self insert so of COURSE they have kittycat ears!! Probably processor over matter'd them into existence too through sheer willpower. Because they're neat.

But I did have a phase in I think 2019 where I briefly got back into TFA (but not deeply) and wanted a new OC, because I was in a very sad "noooo you can't ever make anything ✨️cringe✨️" phase. Dark times. I don't know why I let people convince me there could ever be harm in my joy. So I scrapped Ash and made a bot OC instead, because the whole humanxbot thing felt too self-indulgent to be allowed. And thus came Bird. (She also had a different name, but I revamped her completely in the past weeks).

I love Bird. She's honestly my main transformers oc. Bird starts out as a decepticon named PHANTOM-2918-4 (aka Phantom), who's tasked to spy on the Autobots, but over time she instead falls in love with Earth's nature and critters and realizes she wants to protect them, not harm them. Prowl decides to take a chance on her and train her (since Yoketron took a chance on him too). She changes her name to Bird because she loves birds most, since they can fly like her, but the ability isn't associated with evil.

Unlike Ash though, Bird x Prowl doesn't have a good ending because in Bird!canon, the finale still happens. She stays behind on Earth alone after everyone else leaves to protect it and honor Prowl's memory, but he's very much gone. She gets Yoketron's helmet. Their ship song is actually what this blog is named after (Saturn from Sleeping at Last).

[chxna-cheeseycake]

So like at 12 years old I used to be a major and I mean MAJOR Zane fangirl. Zane Ro'Meave was my everything as a kid frfr like I would deadass defend his every action when I was 12. Like even in his MCD form you best bet that 12 year old me was using their every waking breath to stand up for Zane. I would see someone make a valid point about Zane being a dickhole for killing Jeffory and I guarantee you my 12 year old self would still try to find a way to defend Zane. That's just how much I was fucking in love with him bro. This man's straight up shaped my whole personality as a kid because his existence is why my main persona/online alias is Zana. Deadass before I gave her a heavy revamp, my persona was straight up just a female version of Zane 💀 And I always find it kind of funny because I created her long before we got canon genderbents so like... Jess you copying me gurl??/j Anyways, I was such a Zane fangirl that I even cut my bangs at 12 to try to look similar to him. I had wannabe emo bangs in 6th grade because of this fucker. He ruined my life I tell you. I never technically got rid of them either, I just let them grow to be the same length as the rest of my hair. No one in the present day will ever know about it but I will always remember. It's a memory of my middle school days that will never leave me.

And then there's the dramatic irony that after rewatching MCD and Mystreet now, Zane is no longer my number one fave anymore. It's fucking Dante now. Of course I will always love Zane, that bastard clearly holds a special place in my heart. But ultimately, Dante did in fact steal Zane's place as my number one favorite Aphverse character. He pushed Zane off the goddamn podium and snatched up the first place medal for himself. And I have no problem with that. But I just know my 12 year old self would be in pure shock if they saw that I ditched Zane for Dante lmao. Yet at the same time, I can't help but look at this in a poetic sense.

As a child I know I had such an attachment to Zane because I related a lot to him with being that person that was kinda seen as weird because I was quiet and wasn't a social person. I also had a few friends like Zane but just like him, I met some of them through a single friend that interacted with me first cuz I was far too socially awkward to speak to literally anyone. But now that I'm older, I don't really relate to Zane anymore. I'm not a full on social butterfly but back when I was 12, I couldn't even talk to people my own age that weren't friends because of my shyness and socially awkward personality. But now I'm not like that anymore. I would still say I'm a quiet person ofc but nowadays I don't freeze up and immediately get awkward when people I don't really know try talking to me. Sometimes it can still happen but I just don't really do that anymore. I don't think I actively made this choice though it just sorta happened. Growing up will just do that to you I guess lmao. And that's probably why I don't relate to Zane as much anymore and have now gravitated towards Dante. I grew up and now I find myself being more attached and sorta relating to Dante way more now than Zane. Zane's still cool to me but he's just not my fave anymore because I'm not the same person I was when I was 12.

That got way more deep than I was actually expecting lol. But I still stand by my point regardless. Zane was a huge comfort to 12 year old me but not anymore. I still love his character but he just doesn't bring me that same comfort like he did when I was 12 because I don't need that type of comfort anymore. Dante however is my new comfort character probably because I relate to him more now than I did as a kid. I barely paid attention to Dante when I was 12 but look at me now. He's all I ever seem to post about on this blog lmao. Honestly, seeing myself go from having Zane as comfort character in the past to now having Dante as my comfort character kinda brings me a peace of mind because I think it truly represents all the healing I've done over these past years. Even if it is a little silly to think about it in a deep and poetic fashion like this but I don't really care, thinking about this topic just brings me this sort of warmness I don't really know how to explain. I feel like maybe some people will understand what I'm trying to get it. Hopefully. Anyways, hope y'all enjoy my stupid thoughts and rambling because honestly I don't even know what I'm typing anymore skssjkdsdjknon

[princessrainbowpastel]

Happy New Year(‘s Eve)!!!

Just wanna say thank you to @the-weasel-king and @toasty-self-shipping for tagging me in your New Years posts! I love you guys so much!!! 🥰💕

I also wanna say thanks for all the support and love from my mutuals and followers on this blog as well as my side blogs!!! You all have been so kind to me and I’m so thankful to have you all as my friends even if we hardly speak or have never met irl. I don’t have any real friends to hang out with irl, so it’s really nice to have fellow weirdos (I mean that in a good way lol) interact with my posts and even chat with and befriend me!!! It makes me feel less lonely to know there are people out there that are like me and like the same things I do and enjoy the content I make! 🥰 Also please don’t be scared to reach out to me if any of you ever want to chat!!! I’ve made a lot of new friends through tumblr this year and it’s been an absolute joy to get to know you guys and chat with you about fandoms and characters and more! ☺️

I also just want to admit that it’s been a rough year for me personally and my family and I have been through a lot of crap (and we still are dealing with a lot of crap), but tumblr has been my safe space to help me escape from all that which is nice. I’m sorry if I’ve been slow on replies, asks, or even my works lately on my blogs (specifically @persephoneflowerpetals because I’ve been inactive on my tf2 blog lately lol, also planning on updating/revamping that blog at some point). Like I said, I’ve been dealing with a lot at home and we’re now understaffed at work, so I’ve been very drained because of the holidays and everything going on. I also work in customer service so I have a very emotionally, mentally, and most times physically (because I work in a busy pet store with lots of heavy items I have to lift and I’m always running around the store or chasing loose dogs) draining job, so I’ve just been way too tired to work on my stuff recently. All I want to do is eat and sleep when I get home from my shifts and if I’m not doing that I’m just watching YouTube or playing video games to relax because I have so many video games I haven’t had the time to play because of work lol. Of course, I’m not saying all this to make anyone feel sorry for me or anything like that, I just wanted to mention that because like I said, tumblr has been an outlet for me to escape my real life challenges for a moment and just be happy, but also real life crap has kept me from working on the content I enjoy making. Hopefully, once we get to next year things will be better and I’ll have the energy and time to write and do the things I want lol.

But yeah, there’s so many people on here I could tag and thank for everything, so I can’t tag ya all, so if you are a mutual or follower I hope you’re able to see this and know that I’m so so so greatful to have you interact with me and I love you all with my whole heart!!! I hope you all have a wonderful new year and that 2024 will be a good year for everyone ☺️💕

[estrelladeishtar-archive]

Catch me resurfacing after 5000 years only to (maybe) slip back away & into the void of space like some kinda cryptid

Also I updated the desktop blog themes for here & my personal bc it’s about time I got off my ass & did that

Anyway

I guess we’ve been long overdue for an updates post yeah? Last one I made was legit Nov 2021... I think I should at least leave another update post before seeing if I’m still around or end up vanishing yet again, lmfao But regardless, getting to the point...

Tossing shit under a read more just so that in case of a lengthy ass post it doesn’t clog people’s dashboards (dashboards? timelines? ...I’ve been mostly on twitter lmao so). TL;DR, life’s come swinging hard at me so it’s kept all of my focus mostly on personal matters, less on art, even with still creating things in the distance despite taking a lengthy hiatus (that’s arguably still ongoing? a semi hiatus now perhaps) so.

So I mean, for starters its kinda. Obvious that I’ve been more active on other social media sites rather than here, & tbh whether I really stick around here for long or end up disappearing back into the depths once more for whatever unforeseen reason is yet to be seen, especially since I only really use this place on occasion (for my mental health’s sake, mostly, whether that’ll change over time or will always remain in this “appears only occasionally” cycle is something we’ve yet to see, but for now... just don’t count on me really being consistently active here)

But even with being more active on other places I’ve still taken a semi-hiatus/hiatus, with a major part of that being attributed to uh. Health issues coming back with a vengeance & tryna crush me lol. I mean that’s, kinda par for the course with chronic illness I guess? But it’s put a heavy emphasis on me having to look after myself even moreso than before, & this amidst still processing some really heavy shit I mentioned in my last update that I won’t get into (bc it’s both deeply personal & very trigger heavy), on top of other things life keeps throwing at me (because of course it would), well I’ve just taken priority on taking care of that & making sure I’m fine &... thus not really being too present on here or anywhere really. Sometimes showing up on occasions because I engage with astrology related communities (since I’m learning more on that & other personal practices I won’t bore y’all with), sometimes showing up to support other artists, but yeah.

I do admit tho I’ve still been creating stuff in the background. Be it practicing with stuff art wise or working on other personal OC stuff or projects, I’ve had that still, & its one of the things that helps keep me afloat whilst also navigating, well, life itself. It’s admittedly been difficult navigating shit also tho because due to my health situation, I can’t really do comms (& I’ve been on break from them due to burnout), so income’s been... troublesome to say the least considering medical bills & all that. So trying to find ways to get that & sometimes getting help from others has been another thing that’s kept me away, but yeah.

Ultimately tl;dr of it is that I’ve just had life itself as a priority above all other things. & it’s bound to stay that way for a while, so yeah. But I still do want to see if, on occasions I’m on here posting art, I can maybe share some stuff around the OCs I’ve worked on/created/etc, as well as maybe lore for personal worldbuilding stuff?

I mean I need to share it on my toyhouse eventually anyway LOL, & AT LEAST on here I can make posts about OCs without being constrained to a fucking 280 char limit per post if I opt to do so 💀 Or see what else I choose to share as well as the art I make from time to time? Especially since I’ve been majorly revamping my own OCs & even with my sona I’ll soon be showcasing their proper ref in full with all forms of them/versions of em, both in & out of fandom but. yeah. Things to come.

Also- do expect more of this acct to start turning more OC focused or, IF I share fancharacters, its more centered around them... It doesn’t mean I’ll stop doing fanart no, since I do enjoy doing that on my spare time too, BUT I want my focus shifted primarily on OC content more since that’s my own personal passion anyway (be it OCs, fancharacters, self ship stuff too, or other’s OCs also) & cause I usually have more to ramble on about when it comes to OCs? So yeah. I plan to also implement other changes later into this acct but I’m presently just figuring that mess out while still being on semi-hiatus so yeah.

I hope all of y’all have been doing well & I do appreciate those who’ve stuck around still despite my routine appearing & disappearing bs lmao, & I wish y’all well also

...This update turned a lot longer than I anticipated but hey, least it’s not me updating at some weird ass fucking hour bc of being wide awake at strange times (my sleep schedule’s still broken as hell) (no its not ever going to improve probably) (Its been this way since 2010) (so don’t count on it improving)

[odukora-lore]

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Good day beans, this started out as a slightly more organized page for blorbo lore™ but I was crazy once they locked me in a room with blorbos so now I've singlehandedly coded a fucking site for them 🔥 which resulted in this blog becoming practically useless for archive purposes

I'm prone to recycling things ♻️🗑️ so I figured I'd revamp this place into some sort of ask blog just to cure my occasional boredom (also cuz I've never done an ask blog before and I wanna know what all the hype is about lmao)

Anyways some things to consider before you jump into the rabbit hole 🕳️

All my rambles here are for a fictional universe (Odukora) that I've been developing since 2018, spanning a single lengthy ass timeline and several stories and 200+ blorbos lol, it may seem overwhelming at first but if you wanna get to know them I'll usually start off talking abt my two main stories, all you gotta do is hit that BLORBO INQUIRY button ☝️

All my stories (especially my main stories) are a means of self-expression and exploration of morality through fiction (its practically a hobby for me at this point, I have no limits) hence my lore will have depictions of stuff including but not limited to: mature themes (strong language, suggestive themes) & dark subject matter (death, mind control, manipulation, abuse, trauma, murder, suicide ideation, violence). Do proceed at your own risk.

You're free to ask pretty much anything blorbo related 🔥 I don't plan to rlly release the stories into the wild and I'm just here for the lore ride so spoilers aren't too big of a concern here, though some parts of the lore are best consumed bit by bit for maximum effect so I may or may not reveal everything straight away upon a single ask.

Any asks regarding fandom/personal life will be pretty much ignored unless I manage to relate it to blorbo shenanigans to make it relevant here. Otherwise it's a 50/50 gamble don't push your luck too hard lmao

If I'm not comfortable answering an ask then I'll just straight up ignore it don't take it too personally lol

I may not reply immediately cuz I'm a busy ass and prone to weekly to monthly disappearances, in the meantime you may check out my other blogs to quench your thirst:

✧ art archive — @mykz-artchive

✧ main art blog — @myxraeth-art

✧ alt acc for misc reblogs — @miscmykz

✧ alt acc for art reblogs —@musemykz

Once again here is the actual blorbo site on Neocities if you wanna dig more abt them (mostly WIP though)

- - - - - - -

[ughgojo]

—𝐒𝐔𝐍𝐀 𝐁𝐎𝐘𝐅𝐑𝐈𝐄𝐍𝐃 𝐇𝐄𝐀𝐃𝐂𝐀𝐍𝐎𝐍𝐒

ft: suna rintarou

synopsis: things i think suna does when you’re in a relationship.

content warnings: mentions of weed and making out.

note from the author: i’ve done this post on my previous blog but i’m revamping it into a better version kinda. i will come out with more original content soon! likes, comments, and reblogs are appreciated.

— he’s clingy, very clingy if you will. his stoic and nonchalant demeanour drops the second he gets around you. he always has to be touching you in some way. whether it’s a hand on your arm or him laying his head in your lap. if the boys tease him about it he just points out the fact that none of them have relationships.

— he doesn’t really mind pda but he also won’t go too extreme with it. a handhold and maybe a kiss here and there. but, if you are into pda he will try to accommodate for you.

— he captures every moment you two have together. and when i say everything i mean EVERYTHING. he has a whole album of photos that are just of you in your most ‘candid worthy moments’ as he would say. some are good, you smiling while he told you a joke in the middle of a date. and some are not so good, him catching you mid sneeze or while you are asleep, mouth wide open, with drool running down your cheek. yes, he uses these as blackmail.

— his whole instagram is dedicated to either singular pictures of you or pictures of you and him. sometimes he won’t even caption the photo, and will just post it and turn off the comments. he doesn’t want anyone commenting on how cute you are. he knows and makes sure to tell you every day in some asshole, sarcastic way.

— i see his love language being quality time and acts of service. since he doesn’t talk much and the few words he does speak are sarcastic banter, he believes actions speak louder than words. and as i said earlier, he loves to just sit and enjoy your presence. no talking, just the sound of you two breathing with the occasional laughter if he shows you a video he seen on tiktok.

— always gives you his jackets. but, he will complain first. will mumble something about ‘how you need to buy your own and stop trying to take all of his’ before giving it to you. on days he knows it’s cold and you’re going to ask for one, he brings two and sprays the one he’s wearing with cologne so it smells more like him.

— if he’s bored and he misses you he will face time you over the weirdest things. “hey baby, you left a strand of your hair over my house and i was wondering if you wanted it back?” lol just really annoying.

— when he knows you’re dead sleep he will whisper the things he likes/loves about you. one time you were awake while he thought you were asleep and he confessed his love for you. you never brought it up though just in case he got embarrassed and but you daydreamed about it for days.

— lives to tease you because he loves your reactions and it doesn’t matter whether you say something snarky back or you just get all shy on him.

— i don’t headcanon suna as a smoker most of the time since he’s passionate about volleyball and they’re very strict about no drugs and sobriety. but, there will be special occasions where he likes to let loose and smoke once in a while and he only likes to smoke with you, so you can shotgun which turns into make out session on his couch.

— also the type to not let you walk away from him without giving him a kiss, ever. he will definitely grab your wrist and pull you into his lap just to kiss him. and it doesn’t matter if he’s kissed you 10 times in the last 5 minutes, he’s just infatuated with you.

— has a picture of you on his lock screen, home screen, and in his phone case and he looks at all of them when he’s sad or misses you.

— you’ve met his sister before. she loves you and both of them try to compete for your time whenever you come over because they both just love you so much. rin’s sister has won more than he has and he sits in the corner and sulks until you pay attention to him.

[chadwickswidowspeak]

Death on the Nile...a very biased review

First off.. you already know why I went to see it (just take a look around my blog lol).

Somethings to get off my chest that really don’t have anything to do with the film--

- I understand (for reasons) why there was barely any promo, but I really would’ve loved to hear Tish talk about why she wanted this part, doing an American accent(!), her insights on the character,  and her thoughts on the fashions dahhling.

- Overall, it was really nice to see Tish on the big screen again!! It has been too long! She looked so good, plus it was nice to see her give us something new, something different. I like that she is switching it up.

My Thoughts on Her Character

The Lewks

- She looked really beautiful in the film. Cheekbones, jawline, and lipgloss was poppin.’

- The finger waves were really cute and soft. This was a totally different look for her and I thought she fit in well with the time period. They obviously took some creative liberties in revamping certain characters. This takes place in 1937.

- The melanin popped as much as it was able... One of my gripes was the lighting!! Sometimes ( in the gif above) you could really see the great job the make up team did (flash on obv lol), but other times it was dark af, but you could see the white people perfectly. (For another day, another rant we’ll discuss in general how the film industry refuses to light black people darker than a paper bag properly)

- Now, her character was the niece and manager of her aunt, the singer, Salome Otterbourne. So, understandably, her looks were more understated and conservative than say, some of the other women. I mean, she was gonna stand out regardless ( they were the only two black people in the main cast), but I still would’ve liked some more pops of color and different styles. The black and white dress a-line dress was my favorite. I’m also interested to know how old she was supposed to be---I’m guessing late 20s, early 30s? She didn’t give me some young girl. Plus, to be a manager of a blues singer? You need to have been in the mix for a bit.

The Character

- I liked Rosalie as a character---she was smart as a whip, observant (which you need to make it out of a murder mystery), and tenacious. In a sea of characters, she definitely stood out.

- Beyond just being her aunt’s manager, she also had a secret romance with this yt man. They didn’t really build up to that, kinda just told us they were in love with each other and *I* didn’t see any chemistry there but...

- However, this gives her character an emotional hook as the mystery and murder unfolds.

- Tish had some great moments i.e confronting Poirot for being a hypocrite, (like I love it when she gets angry and calls him out on his shit--he deserves it), she has a pretty big introduction sequence, where you kind of get a feeling that Rosalie doesn’t take any shit and knows what she wants and how to make it happen. ( the gif below is from that intro scene), also she stayed calling these yt folks out. lol

- Another thing on the romance storyline, it was hard to see it for them because we barely got to see them interact as a couple, romantically. I’m not sure if it’s like that in the book, or if some stuff was cut because off time, or what, but it would’ve been nice to see that explored more. It also would’ve made me feel more for them as a couple  when shit got real.

- The accent! Tish’s character had an American accent, with like a hint of southern belle? I don’t know for sure. Sometimes it worked for me ( like when she got pissed), and other times not as much.  I realize this movie was made several years ago, so I would love to see her revisit that accent now or at some point in the future. 

Final Thoughts

- Although, I only saw this to support Tish, I actually enjoyed the movie as a whole.  I really got into it once the murder happened. It was weird, I went into it convinced of who did it, but literally *everyone* was looking funny in the light tbh.

- The media has been really dramatic about this movie coming out and it is really not that deep. LOL. I hate them, for real.

- And I wouldn’t look at this role as indicative of where she stands now as an actress (go watch her in Small Axe if you haven’t, she kills it.) She definitely did what she needed to do at the end of the day (and wasn’t nobody giving Viola Davis/ Denzel Washington level performances on de Nile ok)

-Tish would be fun to watch in a horror movie. She has a really good scared/shook face LOL

- And if anyone else has seen/hasn’t seen the movie and have comments/questions, hit up my ask box! I’d love to hear your thoughts.

[chickenmcstucky]

FIRST OFF YOUR REVAMP OF YOUR BLOG?!?! *chef’s kiss* 😭😭😭 second... 👉👈 if you’re able to do requests 👉👈 can I request 40s!bucky advancing with reader on a date? Maybe before he gets shipped out? 👉👈 you can do whatever you want with it! Thank you for reading this AND I CAN’T WAIT FOR WHATS TO COME FROM YOU

ROSEEEEEEE you are my heart omg <3 seriously none of this would be happening without you. I did a little headcanon-style thing for this, I hope that’s okay and that you like it!! Also this got really long, its basically a full length fic in bullet point form lol

So because I love a soft, sweet Bucky, it starts like this -

You were on a first date with some guy your mother had set you up with, seeing as his mother and your mother were friendly

At first you were excited, you’d never really talked to him much but he was handsome and you thought maybe it could go somewhere

All your girlfriends were always going on dates and having a good time, while you usually preferred to stay in with a good book, and to be honest you’d never gotten as much interest from fellas as them but that was alright, you were happy as you were

So there you were, out on the first date with Freddie Jameson, and from the start it was...less than great

He picked you up late, didn’t even compliment your dress, did none of the things your girlfriends were always gushing over guys for doing

On your way to the cinema, he was absolutely talking your ear off about some stupid argument he had with some guys down at the docks where he did the books

You couldn’t get a word in edgewise, but honestly you didn’t wanna talk anyways because this guy was just not who you expected or wanted...some big macho guy obsessed with his reputation and single-minded to the point of barely paying attention to you? No thanks. You knew your worth

You were determined to push through the date, hopeful to a fault, so when you arrived to the cinema and he let you pick the film, you were surprised, but picked the new sci-fi film The Invisible Woman

From the way Freddie scoffed at this, and grudgingly bought the tickets, acting like it was an inconvenience, you should’ve known things would only get worse, but on into the theater you went

When Freddie realized the story revolved around a woman - one getting comedic revenge on her boss, no less - he gave you some choice words about how you were forcing this new-age mess on him, how he didn’t really wanna take you out anyways but had been “kind” enough to give you a chance, this that and the other thing until you were in tears and your face was so hot you were sure the temperature in the theater had raised a few degrees

When someone in the theater finally spoke up, it wasn’t even to defend you, but to tell you two to take it the heck outside and stop interrupting

Freddie stomped right out, and with your only other option being to cower in the theater, alone, for the rest of the film, you left too

By the time you made it outside, Freddie was long gone, and you barely managed to slink around the corner to the back alley before the tears started falling in earnest

Just your luck to finally go on a date, and get left in the lurch and embarrassed in front of a whole theater of strangers

As you stood against the brick wall in the darkness of the warm night, you tried to calm yourself down enough to catch the streetcar back home so you could sulk in the privacy of your own room

Suddenly you heard two male voices and your head jerked up because you really didn’t need more humiliation - or worse, danger - right now

But when you saw the two men come around the corner, you relaxed seeing it was none other than Bucky Barnes and little Steve Rogers, and you knew they wouldn’t cause you trouble, Bucky was an Army man after all, just back from basic training

You’d never really interacted with them except as children, knowing Steve could be a real spitfire and Bucky a sweet flirt, but they were good men without poor reputations relating to ladies

Still, you rather hoped they’d just pass on by you without noticing, because really, you’d had enough for the night

Just your luck, though, Steve noticed - he must’ve known how it felt to be sulking, defeated, in an alleyway and sensed your struggle

As you made eye contact with him, you saw him nudge Bucky, who had yet to notice, and gesture towards you, the two of them still a fair distance from you

They immediately turned course and walked right towards you, as you just stood there blinking like a deer in headlights, unsure how to act and stuck between embarrassment for your state and hope that maybe you could at least ask them to accompany you to the streetcar stop so you didn’t have to go alone in the dark

“Uh, you alright there?” Steve spoke first as they came to a stop in front of you, scuffing his foot against the dusty pavement as Bucky took in your appearance, you feeling his eyes run over you from head to toe

You sniffled, unsure what to say and not wanting to reveal to them the humiliation you’d suffered - though you knew Freddie had been a real jerk, it was your pride that would suffer the more people knew what had happened

Then a smooth, sweet voice broke the silence, “did something happen, doll? What’s a nice dame like you doing alone in some back alley at night, huh?”

Something about the softness in his voice enveloped you in safety, and you couldn’t help but blurt the truth, “oh, it’s just awful, I was meant to be on a date with Freddie Jameson and he was so coarse and he just humiliated me in front of everyone and then just left,” your voice broke on the last word as the tears threatened again

When you raised your head back up, you saw a cold look of anger come over both mens’ faces, “that Freddie ain’t nothing but a jerk,” Bucky harrumphed, and Steve nodded ferociously, a look of determination coming over his face

“Somebody oughta teach him a lesson, that ain’t no way to treat a dame,” Steve growled, and before you or Bucky could protest, he stalked off, presumably in search of Freddie; you never forgot how once in grade school he’d punched a boy for pulling your hair, he hadn’t changed at all of course

You couldn’t help but laugh, knowing he’d show up tomorrow with a split lip and a black eye, but endeared by his passion in defending you

At your own giggle, Bucky’s handsome face broke out in a soft smile, as you shared a moment of reprieve from your upset

“I’m real sorry, doll, you didn’t deserve to be treated like that - Freddie don’t know what he’s missin, alright?” he spoke gently, and you couldn’t help but believe he meant it, seeing something in his eyes that gave you sweet pause

“I guess I know that, it’s just - I never - finally a date and it goes like this,” you scoffed, shrugging

“You never had a date before, doll?” you were surprised to see some genuine shock on his face

“Well, not never, I mean, just nothin serious now that I’m out of school and all, I guess…” you trailed off - here you were admitting to one of the handsomest GIs around that you didn’t have dates every Friday night like the other girls

“Well, we’re gonna have to fix that,” Bucky’s head tilted up, as if daring you to protest, a confident expression on his young face

“Oh, can’t I just go home, Bucky? I don’t wanna see Freddie again,” you kept the whine out of your voice, but just barely, thinking he was gonna find Steve and Freddie and force Freddie to finish your date

“I, uh, I meant - well, how bout I accompany you home, pretty girl like you shouldn’t have to walk around alone,” he insisted, but the slight pinkness on his face confused you, soon realizing perhaps you’d misunderstood his statement

Relief washed over you, though the sting of Freddie’s actions was still fresh, you were glad to not have to journey home alone; explaining to your mother why you were home so early was going to be bad enough as it was

“Gee, Bucky, that’s so kind of you,” you smiled, and he offered you the crook of his arm

“You’re over at Sycamore, right?” he inquired, and you realized perhaps he had paid you more attention over the years than you’d noticed, as you nodded yes

Gently, you wrapped your arm around his elbow, the soft fabric of his handsome uniform rubbing against your bare skin, and with your manicured fingers pressed against his forearm, something so right seemed to click into place, an unfamiliar yet not unwelcome feeling

As he walked you down the avenue, you were at first quiet, still unsure how to start a conversation with someone who had found you in such a state and who was being so kind

But Bucky, ever the ladies’ man, kept the conversation going, and as he talked about the upcoming Stark expo after he saw your eyes draw to the colorful advertisement for it on the front of the ice cream parlor

you were struck by the fact that you and Bucky really shared similar interests - innovation, sci-fi, adventure...soon you found yourself enthusiastically talking to him about all your favorite adventure books and how you hoped to see Stark himself present at the expo when it opened next month

Before you knew it, you were in front of your family’s apartment building; you hadn’t even realized Bucky had skipped the streetcar and walked you all the way home

You were struck by how much you wished the walk was longer, or that you could linger outside, but you already felt like Bucky had done enough for you and you knew you should go inside and face the music, get it over with

You slowly pulled your arm from its perch on Bucky’s, but before you could pull away fully, he caught your soft hand in his larger one as he gazed into your eyes

“Well, guess you’re home safe now, doll, it was real nice talking to ya,” he laughed a little, but he didn’t release his grasp on your hand

“That was the most fun I’ve had in a long while,” you laughed at yourself, “tonight wasn’t so bad after all,” you smiled at him and squeezed his hand, his reticence to leave giving you courage as you flirted

“Thank you again, Bucky, you really didn’t have to do this but I’m so grateful,” the earnestness in your voice shocked even you; he had really saved you from taking the streetcar alone, and had chased your upset mood right away with his boyish passion in your conversation

“My pleasure, honey. Listen, I know you might not wanna after such a bad experience, but hows about I take you on a proper date sometime? I’d really like to get to know you more, and besides, someone oughta show you what Freddie failed at,” your heart thumped at the offer and the prospect of someone like him wanting you

You were still scared though, what if it was just pity that had led him to talk you home and ask you out? What if the date went just as badly, and it turned out you were the problem, and not Freddie?

You realized your silence after his question had stretched out an uncomfortable amount as you saw his sheepish look, his hand reaching up to rub the back of his neck nervously

Before he got the wrong idea, you finally found your voice, “I’d like that,” you said simply, shyness overcoming you once again

“Next Friday then, is it alright if I come pick you up? Say, around 7? We’ll have a real nice time, I’ll make sure, you deserve it doll,” Bucky was speaking so fast you couldn’t get a word in, but his charming nervousness was too cute

“Friday at seven,” you nodded, as he gave your hand one last squeeze before letting go of it

The whole week you were on edge, teetering between nerves and excitement at the prospect of your date, you were still so surprised at your luck that such a bad night could turn out so well, and that the handsome Bucky Barnes was so similar to you

Of course, in the back of your mind you knew he’d surely be shipping out soon, but all your girlfriends were dealing with that too, and you pushed the thought away, wanting to just enjoy the time you had

True to his word, Bucky knocked on your door right at 7, your father answering the door as you were still in your room finishing getting ready with your mother

You heard their voices down the hallway as Bucky introduced himself respectfully to your father; he really did seem like such a gentleman

Your mother put the finishing touches on your updo and sent you out to the living room to face your date

As you came into the room, your eyes went straight to Bucky, looking so dapper in his uniform - you loved that all the boys yet to ship out were required to wear their dress uniform while they were out, it was just so romantic

You saw a small bouquet of flowers in his hand and smiled shyly as you crossed over to him, taking the bouquet from his offering hands and thanking him kindly for the gesture

You went to hand the bouquet to your mother to put in a vase, but Bucky reached out and grabbed a single bloom first, tucking it into your pinned hair

“You look beautiful tonight,” he complimented you; you thought your mother might faint from excitement but you just looked down at your feet, a small smile gracing your face

“Thank you, Bucky, you’re very kind. Shall we?” you gestured towards the door and he led you towards it, his hand at the small of your back as your parents looked on

In contrast to his talkativeness from the previous week, Bucky was quiet at first as he walked you towards the main avenue, but it was a comfortable silence

“Oh!” he exclaimed suddenly, as though just then realizing where he was and what he was doing, “Jeez, look at me, said I’d take you on a proper date and I ain’t even held your hand,” he shook his head at himself and offered you his calloused hand, which you took gratefully

You found his sudden nervousness endearing, but it was soon gone as comfortable conversation began to flow; he asked about your week and didn’t seem to mind when you talked about your trip to the hair salon and the new dress your mother was having made for you, instead he was hanging on your every word like you were a new adventure book

To him, you truly were a new adventure, he’d talk about anything you wanted as long as he got to be with you

You talked with him about anything and everything as you made your way to your destination, him even joking to you about Steve’s rather unsuccessful attempt to defend your honor to Freddie, but you realized he never actually told you where you were going

“So,” you lilted at him, “where does a fella like you take a girl like me on a ‘proper date’ then?” you queried him, laughter in your voice because this was truly so fun, you’d be happy to just walk around talking all night

“Oh, I can’t tell ya just yet, sweetheart, it’s a surprise,” he winked at you and your knees went weak

Soon, though, you arrived at a cinema, not the same one as your disastrous date with Freddie thankfully

As Bucky walked you up to the ticket booth, you were excited to see what he’d choose

“Two tickets for the special showing, please,” he said to the boy in the booth as he handed over the dollar

Of course, he was expected to pay, but the way he was so confident in asking for the tickets and had the money ready made you feel like he was so glad to do it, honored, even

Bucky took the two tickets and steered you into the theater, but not before you saw the sign for the special event posted just at the door, they were projecting a special film about space onto the ceiling of the cinema - one of those planetarium experiences!

You couldn’t contain yourself, “Oh Bucky, wow! “A Journey through the Stars,” you read from the poster, “oh wow,” you repeated

“I hoped you’d like it,” Bucky said shyly, “let’s go on in, I want to get you a good seat”

The whole film, you were just enraptured by the narrator talking about cosmos and black holes, whole new solar systems

But Bucky was barely paying attention, his gaze drifting to your awed face

Sometimes you felt his eyes on you and you’d glance over, shy, but he’d look away just quick enough that you couldn’t be sure he was looking at you

As you walked out of the theater, he gently put his arm around you, and you reached up and grabbed his hand to keep it there; you felt so at home with him

“Bucky that was amazing, thank you!” you gushed as he led you down the street

“I’m real glad you liked it, doll,” he answered, “how about an ice cream?”

You were happy for the chance to extend the evening, not ready to leave his company

He took you to the same parlor you’d passed the previous week, even holding the door for you and helping you up onto a stool at the counter

“Oh, there are so many choices, I’m not even sure what I want,” you laughed, your eyes scanning the flavors on the blackboard on the wall

“Well, pick your top two, and I’ll get one and you get the other, and we can share!” he babbled, “I mean, if you want, that is…” he trailed off, but you just smiled

You picked classic vanilla, and cookies and cream to be adventurous, and he ordered for the both of you

You laughed and talked the rest of the evening, until finally the old man who ran the shop had to shoo you out so he could close

A little embarrassed at how you’d let the time get away from you, you hesitated on the sidewalk before Bucky offered you his arm again, and you took it, confidently this time

It being fairly late, he took you home via the streetcar this time, wanting to get you home at an appropriate hour so as to stay in your father’s good graces

It was still friday, though, no matter how late, so the car was rather crowded; he led you to the side of the car and grasped the bar running the length of the ceiling with one hand, wrapping your arms around his waist with his other hand so you didn’t have to reach up; once you were secured, he gently wrapped his free arm around your shoulders

Taking his lead, you rested your head in the crook of his neck as the car took you to your stop

The two of you were quiet, basking in the sweet comfort of each other; you kept thinking how right this all felt, and it seemed like something like hope had taken hold in your heart

The car lurched to a halt at your stop and Bucky’s arm tightened around you, keeping you steady, before he guided you onto the street and up the block to your building

You stood in the same place as a week ago, yet so much had changed; it was just one date, but there was a spark between you glowing bright

Slowly, Bucky took your hand, and you stepped closer to him as his thumb rubbed against your hand

“I guess it’s time to say goodnight then,” he spoke, regret coloring his tone

“I had a wonderful time, Bucky, thank you. First dates don’t seem so scary now,” you laughed, “thanks for doing this for me.”

“Happy to, but doll, I didn’t just take you out because of what happened. I just wanted to be with you, get to know you. I sure am glad we found you in that alley, I barely know you but...you’re changing my life, honey”

The adoration and conviction in his voice choked you up, no one had ever made you feel so seen, so wanted

“Oh Bucky, I feel it too, it’s so -” you shook your head, unsure how to vocalize the soaring feeling in your heart

“It feels like...coming home,” he whispered to you, his forehead leaning against yours in a lover’s confession

Instead of replying, you coasted on the wave of feeling that took over you, and kissed him softly, the taste of the ice cream still on his lips

Both your eyes fluttered shut as the simple kiss drove all other thought from your heads

He pulled away first, raising his hand to caress your cheek as he smiled softly, his eyes tearing away from your lips to meet your own sweet gaze

“So,” his kind cockiness returning, “next Friday?” he asked, his head tilting jauntily as he winked at you

“Next Friday,” you returned, your heart swelling

With a final kiss to your knuckles, he opened the door into your building for you, tipping his hat

You finally had a reason to be happy for Friday nights, a handsome fella to offer you his arm

And Bucky had a home to return to; no matter where the Army took him, he had the home you made for him in your heart

[toranekooo]

okay so uh. hello everyone! after several months of heavy contemplation, i've finally decided on what i'll do with this blog. my life has been a wild ride so far and i'm trying very hard to choose something that's satisfactory for me beyond anything. anw, just to catch you up, here's some of the latest happenings with myself and this blog!

TL/DR: im revamping this blog A Lot and am gonna stop trying to censor myself for the sake of my comfort, i'd just like to gain the freedom i achieve in other blogs. thank you for 300+ followers and all the kind words, i appreciate every single one of you!

i graduated!! big yay. top of my batch too so i'm still elated. school has been hectic for me this year and i'm glad it's over for a while now. which is why i wanted to get my thoughts clear and make a decision now.

this blog hit 300+ followers!! yahoo, i was genuinely not expecting that in the middle of my absence but it happened. im very thankful 4 the love and support as well as all the nice words i got!! i struggled w a shit ton of rude anons suddenly after hitting 200+ followers (which is. apparently some form of harrassment threshold bc my blog is Well-Known enough to shit on now lol) and seeing kind messages definitely helped put me back in the vibe. i doubt i'm mentally stable enough to hold an actual event soon but i'll try to cook up smthn to show everyone how happy i am!

i still have severe request burn out. but i do genuinely want to take more reqs and interact more, so i've decided to just. change myself up. for a while now, i genuinely felt like i was running this blog with an unrealistic personality, and as you can see im trying to be more open w myself by speaking how i want and expressing myself in ways that r more comfortable 4 me. i value all of ur opinions on me a lot but i also i cannot for the goodness of my heart risk harming myself further by acting like this.

and we reach the main point of this little message, i'll be revamping this blog. yes, i know i just came back from a revamp but i also want to have more creative and emotional freedom with myself here. the revamp will be big, i'll also be removing some of my sources and adding more stuff on my blacklist.

and, i will be changing my formatting and permanently abandoning the use of the text borders. i enjoyed them a lot and found their designs fun to employ but they're exhausting to keep up with. in all honesty, any consistent formatting is exhausting. i'll be mixing it up as per usual, i hope it doesn't jarr all of you too much. i've always envied how other blogs got the opportunity to be creative w their formats and captions, before i actually realized there is Zero reason for me to be fitting into this tiny little box that no longer makes me happy.

finally, i'm very happy with myself now, however my state is fragile and im on the verge of going back to being hospitalized if i get any worse. i just want to act like myself, i guess? @.hayasakari made me very happy because i felt more in tune to how i actually act and speak and while i doubt i'd be as loose-tongued as i am there in here, i'll probably employ a way of speaking that isnt so suffocating. this became less of a story but more of a rant but, thank you for reading.

[bumblebeesstudies]

I introduced myself once before but fell of the wagon once the new academic year started, so here I am... again, with a revamped theme & look. I´m Bee (22, she/her, scorpio) and I´m a Communications student from The Netherlands. The course is very broad, so I’m still trying to decide what I want to focus on, but at this point graphic design seems to be one of the top contenders. I’m also interested in PR and marketing. 

I’m mostly here to keep myself motivated and I found I do better with friends, so I’m definitely looking for some active blogs to follow and hopefully chat a bit! 

i n t e r e s t s 

- reading. i’m trying to get back into reading for fun. started in january but sadly haven’t picked up a book in months now, but i’m always looking for recommendations to fill my dauntingly long TBR.  - true crime. podcasts! documentaries! books! idk why, but it intrigues me so much. i think i’ve watched everything available on netflix.  - writing. when i was younger, i used to be full of stories and poems and dreamt about getting a book published. i don’t know how, but i think i lost that somewhere along the way. now, i dabble on some RP sites but nothing seems to come naturally anymore. one of my goals for 2021 is to find that creativity again! - music. i play piano and sing. i am mediocre at playing the ukulele and bought a guitar years ago that i still don’t know how to play. i also spend way too much time listening to hamilton on spotify. 

g o a l s 

- do better. i am struggling! results wise, i’m doing fine. my grades are great. i know i like communications. i have fought very hard to be where i am today. but it just doesn’t feel like i have any passion. i’m trying to find that. and writing it down and posting it here for everyone to see hopefully keeps me accountable. 

- be productive. study smarter, not harder, or, you know, longer. trying to find more ways to study, more places to find information. i’m also here for the masterposts lol. 

- find friends. being motivated is easier together. that’s why i’m here - to see everyone else trying their best as well. and maybe talk to some people! i had this idea of starting a group chat (on discord, probably) to stay accountable and talk to people who are also focused on their studies. let me know if that’s something people would be interested in :). 

i n s p o 

studyblrs i like are @study-van @diaryofastemstudent @thestoicstudent @problematicprocrastinator @boldlystudy 

[agustdiv1ne]

thank you + milestone!!

damn, never thought we'd get here, did we?

in all honesty, it's been a pretty shit year. march 'til now has felt like the same month on repeat with tiny tweaks to make it all so much worse. but i'm not here to complain about the worst parts of this year, i'm here to celebrate the best ones.

this was the year that i finally started writing, that i was finally spurred to open a google doc and just type away until a tiny work of fiction stared back at me. my first one was 1k words, a rant to get all of my emotions off of my chest with an idol as my muse. it felt...great, though it also felt a bit odd writing after being an avid reader for years. i always did prefer essays to creative writing, but this year definitely changed that perspective.

i wrote that first blurb along with another fic in late july, and in early august, i asked my friends if i should post them. om august 3rd, i changed this blog from a fic rec to a fic writing blog just like that. i regret none of it.

it's been nearly five months since i revamped this blog and i couldn't be more grateful for the support i have gotten from all of you, whether it be a kind comment, a like, a reblog, all of it. i never thought anyone would like my content, but i've been proven severely wrong by this community. from my irls that are on here, to my lovely mutuals and followers, to those i've talked to a lil bit on this hellsite, to the writers whose fics i absolutely adore, to those who have left a like or a comment on one of my fics, i want to say thank you from the very bottom of my heart ♡

have a happy and healthy new year! i love and appreciate every single one of you!!

though i'm painfully bad at writing letters and getting all sappy, i wanted to write them anyways hahaha let's goooo

to @hwaddict:

my irl best friend!! my partner in crime!!!! i love you sm carly, and there are not enough words in this world for me to describe the extent of my love. you have been there for me during my lowest moments, you've seen me cry, and i don't cry in front of many ppl. i trust you with my life and i'm so glad that we became friends back in middle school bc you are one reasons that spur me to keep going. i can't wait to see where life takes us and know that while i might not always be able to be there physically (especially with college right around the corner), i will always be there for you in any way i can be. again i love you and i can't wait to conquer next year with you ♡♡

to @hopejanaee:

hope!! hobi!!! one of my irls! though we just became friends earlier this year, it feels like we've been friends for ages. it's crazy how close we grew so quickly but i am so grateful to have you in my life. you never fail to make me laugh whenever we're together and you're so chaotic but in such a good way hahaha. you were the one who got me into writing with your own wonderful fics so thank yoi for that. i'm so happy that we became friends because you're so kind and caring and ahhhhhh i love u sm ♡

to @oikawasmilkbread:

we talked for like 0.2 seconds but you are so kind and hella cool!! it was nice having random conversations with you and i'm so glad you randomly dmed me bc i am shy and i have 0 idea how to start conversations with anyone lmao. i always smile when i see you in my notifs! i hope you have a happy new year!!! ♡

to @luthenia:

i know you're on hiatus but seeing you in my notifs always excites me hahaha. we never talk but you are so supportive of everyone in this community and i just wanted to shout you out for that! your memes are top tier LMAO and i can't wait for when you come back, happy new year ♡

to @starsforten:

we also talked for approximately 1 second but it was so fun talking to you about astrology stuff (virgo sun libra rising gang hahahaha) and those teuta matoshi dresses! you are so nice and easy to talk to and i hope your new year is happy and fruitful! ♡

i recommend every single one of these blogs for their amazing content!! i added some of my favorite fics as i'm a whore for great writing hahaaaa

@kinktae

waterloo — a masterpiece! taehyung is so bitter at the beginning and it's adorable seeing how y/n breaks his tough shell. loved this from beginning to the end ♡

hot rod — the 50s slang, the dynamic between hoseok and y/n...*chef's kiss*

@untaemedqueen

welcome to seoul land — werewolf!namjoon really got me going, 100/10 would recommend

graceful gods — this is one of my all-time favorites, greek god!jungkook has my brain going brrrr

@shadowsremedy + @therealmintedmango

support system — adorable!! this is a hybrid!yoongi fic i really enjoy, and the series isn't over yet! check it out~

@bratkook

tear you apart — demon!taehyung...holy shit. i was speechless

@tatertotthethot

the doms next door — THIS SERIES OMG, i've read each part at least five times already. taekook got me acting UP

scream (posted to @yandere-society) — a really cool take on the movie scream with jungkook, yandere fics don't always appeal to me but this one absolutely did

@ateezmakemeweep

broken — the immense ache i felt in my chest while reading this, but i loved both parts with a burning passion. san is so sweet in this :')

@atinybrew

dirty free for all — the ULTIMATE demon!san fic. the writing is absolutely immaculate and this is the first fic that had me blushing down my mf ARMS

rice milk lattes and bryophytes roads — another san fic admittedly because i'm whipped for san lol. anyways, this was cute and hot at the same time and best friend!yunho made my double biasing ass that much happier

@seacottons

pan — an adorable peter pan!hongjoong fic, it had my heart going achhfhsjfjsjf

sir kiss me — circus au with san holy hell i loved every twist and turn of this

@actuallythatwaspromise

bad romance — one of my favorite yunho fics ever, punk rock!yunho x nerd!reader has my entire heart

aurora garden center and desire ink — florist!mingi had me uwuing for the entire fic, this was adorable and i loved it sm

@yeonjuncore

every single fic on this blog is an absolute masterpiece, i swear

the devil's little angel — THIS IS ONE OF MY ULTIMATE FAVORITES, demon!yeonjun had me screaming and it was just so fun to read and i loved every single second of it so much that i've read it nearly ten times now. so go read it, you won't regret it!

the boy with the horns — another of my ultimate favorites (i told you, their writing is just that amazing), woodland fey!soobin just had me going so soft :(( i literally sobbed at one point, that's how invested i was

bleeding heart — the tension between vampire!yeonjun and vampire slayer!reader had me screeching

curtain call — i have a sad crush vampire!soobin

i love you, always — this felt so..bittersweet? taehyun loves y/n so much, i lowkey cried while reading this

@angelfic

the art of (mis)communication — i am a whore for both reconciliation and yeonjun, 100000/10 pls read this i beg of you

@angelictaehyun

growing pains — ahhh once again a yeonjun fic, my chest hurt a lil bit at some points but it was so sweet!!

@neovisioned

bed of spiderwebs — spiderman!mark has my heart screeching, i loved every second of it ♡

eddie ate dynamite — johnny suh coming for my throat yet again

cupid victorious — cupid!jaehyun :'))) definitely one of my favorites!!

@domjaehyun

quarantine chronicles — ok if you haven't read this or the part two yet then you're missing out big time!! the tension, the buildup, every single part of this fic was just *chef's kiss* but multiply thay by a million

all these years — every single moment of this felt so nostalgic and the ending was so sweet :')

@caiuscassiuss

muse — i keep going back to this one constantly, the angst in this phenomenal and i love artist!taeyong sm here

@neoct-zen

loverboy — HOT, AMAZING, I SCREAMED. the blurbs that accompany this are also top-tier i recommend reading each and every one!!

@moondustis

pink + white — i'm so soft for mark i stg, this was the cutest thing ever

@loviejaehyun

can't avoid this feeling — hockey player!mark is the best thing ever

all tied up — i just- screamed as i read this bc professor!jaehyun is too hot goodbye

@hopejanaee

incapable — this is one of the best yoongi fics i've ever read ngl, it's not completed quite yet but the parts that have been posted are top tier!!

breathless — THIS. I LOVED THIS. yuta is just so hfjshhfhshfnsn and i love this sm

@hwaddict

melting point — big boy mingiiii, 100/10 would recommend

@okayau

house next to mine — frat boy!yeonjun rly got me going, cute and hot at the same time ahhhhbfnsnnf

youth — ADORABLE, yeonjun's confession is peak i love it here

run away — how many yeonjun fics can i fit in this post? (answer: a lot) definitely one of my favorite harry potter aus!! it was awesome seeing how their relationship changed throughout the years and perhaps i teared up a little at the end :'))

@starrychannies

baby steps — ONE OF ALL-TIME MY FAVORITE FICS ON THIS SITE, every single part is so well-written and ahhhhhfhdhhf chan makes me feel some type of way

my stupid — another yeonjun fic! angsty but v cute at the end :')

@baekhvuns

this youth of craziness — 40k words of pure gold, this fic is absolutely one of my favorite san fics ever!!

replacement — prince!ten makes my brain go brrrr, i love how the y/n just speaks her mind here

@masterninjacow

untitled project — i saw soulmate au with mark and i knew would already love it, and i did! pizza boy!mark at that, amazing and i adored it

more amazing blogs!!: @galaxteez, @poutybinz, @lustjoong, @bloominghigh

these are just a few of the fics and blogs i found this year, find more on my fic rec blog @agustdiv1ne-recs!! (my thumbs are starting to hurt i'm so sorry bfjshfhsh)

wrapping up each month since august since that's when i actually started posting LMAO

☆ august

03: good enough — chan

03: bloodsucker — seonghwa

04: cutie — san

09: veloxrotaphobia — mingi

19: want — changbin

21: numb — yunho

100 follower special — i reached 100 followers towards the end of august, my first ever milestone :') also my first ever time taking requests, 'twas very fun ♡

☆ september

03: on camera — jungkook

☆ october

27: oh, worm? — namjoon

31: demon days — san

☆ november

10: a letter to my love — xiaojun

23: bad for u — jaehyun

27: home sweet home — yeonjun

☆ december

christmas bash 2020 — my brain went hey what if you did this- and i listened so here's 17 holiday fics hahahaa (not all of them are out yet but i'm working on it!!)

things i plan to release in 2021!!

☆ sunflower — jimin

☆ cross — yeonjun

☆ landslide — seonghwa

☆ nice save — san

☆ red — hyunjin

☆ a secret series (that will be revealed once i plan everything) — ateez

☆ 4 unrelated secret fics oOoOoo — will i reveal them? you'll just have to wait and see ;)

there will definitely be more posted! these are the ones that are going to be my priority at first, but my imagination is always churning so expect a lot more :)) check out all of non-secret wips here!

i hit 500 followers a couple days ago! i nearly screamed when i saw that LMAO. thank you so much for liking my content because i work hella hard on it :') sometimes i feel like i don't deserve y'all really, but @hwaddict will yell at me if i say that so ig i take it back hfhshhdhg

a post for celebrating this milestone will come as soon as i finish up the rest of my christmas fics!! sorry that i'm so slow :( (hint: my requests will be open, so look out for it!)

so yeah!! that's it, sorry for the painfully long post (i'm sorry to my thumbs for typing this whole thing out </3). thank you to everyone who read this far!! i hope everyone has a happy and healthy new year, and in the words of txt's cover, fuck 2020. may 2021 be a much better year for all of us!!!

much love,

ashlee ♡

[flashfuture]

I’m a bit of an outsider but it seems like the 90’s were a very paradoxical time for dc because from everything I’ve read Wally and Kyle’s runs are right bangers but like...I’ve also heard...other things about how other characters were written thats...less than flattering.

It’s okay the thing is lol that it depends on the character itself. The 90s was actually going to be a swap over and retiring period that well it didn’t happen. So here is my character break downs of the take over characters.

--

The Flash

Wally was a silver age character. He was Barry’s legacy and Flash was already a legacy from golden age Jay Garrick. Wally took over in the late 80s. Barry was gone and Wally took up his mantle. The Flash Team knew this was coming.

He got an entire series about himself settling into his own without really anyone to help him. Rudy and Mary were terrible. Barry and Iris were dead. It was Wally and some friends he made.

Wally remained the solo Flash until 2010 ish when they brought back Barry. But Wally is currently the Flash again and hopefully DC will stop harming my baby boy. 

--

Batman & Robin

Dick Grayson was growing up. And post crisis Bruce went from a overprotective father who Dick wanted space from to an abusive manipulative father who Dick was essentially running from.

Nightwing was Dick coming into his own. Connection to Clark’s mythos. At this point Dick was both a legacy to Bruce and Clark.

But Robin oh Robin. That was a symbol that didn’t fit with their new dark(er) Knight. So Golden Age Robin had to die. But Dick is busy.

Well who was just Robin right before Crisis? The Dick Grayson copy- Jason Todd.

So they bring back Jason and give him a quick revamp. They make him all chirpy and happy so Golden Age. But dark enough that he’s similar enough to NTT age Dick. Then they kill him. Like okay people say it was the vote but DC always wanted Jason or more accurately Golden Age Robin dead.

Which paved way for Tim Drake’s Robin. Someone who was made for this new darker Bruce. But would have also been paired with Dick’s more efficent Batman. However this failed when Azrael fucked hard with Tim’s character and bolstered Tim’s importance beyond the normal Robin levels. 

He was there to validate every bullshit thing Bruce was doing. He was there to validate child soldiers and reset the narrative from partner to general and soldier.

The issue for many fans comes from Tim’s character being a dork who siphoned off Dick’s chip on his shoulder colder more analytical mind.

Tim was just super eager and happy to help. (His backstory was pretty much just Bette Kane redone as a friend pointed out to me)

So Dick started to morph into happy big brother here. But the Batfam was changed in Crisis so the Batfam angle didn’t fit.

Dick wasn’t as hostile to Jason as some people would think but they weren’t close.

Dick was very close to Tim. I think original Tim paired with non altered Dick was a very good pair who worked well together.

It’s just when Tim became more and more popular he was given the traits that made Dick so popular and work so well.

Dick gave back the mantle to Bruce and Tim well Tim get siphoning more and more of Dick as time went on. 

Barely recognizable to their 90s and before counterparts

--

Green Lantern

Kyle is actually more controversial than I might lead people on this blog to believe lol. Due to my undying and biased love for him.

He came in as a character who was going to put a new spin on Green Lantern. He was younger and fresher faced. But Hal’s Parallax arc as many might not know was quick as fuck. He just turned evil after Coast City and went for Genocide. 

Kyle was yeeted the ring and he went in to try and help save the world. Kyle was the one who talked down Hal. Hal handed him the ring and said you’re the green lantern. The passing of the torch really. 

But Kyle wasn’t beloved by everyone. Many people found his entry too quick. They thought he was too good with the ring too quick. They didn’t like his character. Thought he was too emotional to be a GL not enough Will. Lot’s of different takes. 

Also Guy and John were there and many people would have preferred to see them if it wasn’t gonna be Hal. 

Kyle and Donna was another thing that was alienating. Many people would have preferred to see her with Roy (plus I hate her with Kyle but that’s me) 

Kyle remained the sole GA until 2005 ish so about 10 years. And he continues to be a major player to this day.

--

Green Arrow

Chuck Dixon hated Ollie and wanted him dead. So in came Connor Hawke. Ollie’s bastard son and a really talented martial artist that Ollie met at the Ashram. 

Ollie acted ooc as fuck during this run but he died in a plane crash. 

And Conn took over his place as the Green Arrow. Roy was doing Checkmate and Titans stuff anyways but no one asked him. 

Connor is my baby boy my favorite DC character. But he also wasn’t that popular. 

Obviously racism. They couldn’t even agree on a skin color. Many people were turned away by the perceived ‘preachiness’ of you know bringing up real world issues. 

A lot of people also didn’t like Conn being presented as a better martial artist than a lot of the Batfam (the fanon bias has always been strong) 

He was main GA until 2001 when Ollie came back. 

--

Superboy

Okay we got Kon way back when Clark ate it and then he was sort of here. Younger than the above kids but obviously the intended take over for Clark. 

But then Clark came back. And it was just the take over didn’t happen here. 

[fipindustries]

list of comics i made so far

i already shared the list of all the novels i tried to write throughout my llife so i see no reason why not to do the same with the comics i tried to work on. no i should clarify, with my lists of novels there was a clear cut distinction between what was a novel and a short story so to parse one from the other was an easy task. it should be known that i wrote hundreds of shorts stories that i havent shared with anyone. now a similar situation occurs with my comics, i have done hundreds upon hundreds of little comics, short jokes, little skits and short lived strips through my life, so in order to give this list some weight and not make it longer than the bible the criteria i used was that it had to be something i did on a regular basis or that tells a self contained story with a beggining middle and end.

now without further ado, lets begin!

spike Vanderville (age 7)

you can tell i was way more into comics than i was into novels from a young age. done with pen and folded paper, it was the story about a young kid called spike, whose design was heavily inspired by bradley from sticking around, who had magical powers which allowed him to manipulate reality. it was a mix of harry potter and a series of illustrates short stories that came in a magazine in argentina. his best friend was a scarecrow with a pumpkin head that he had brought to life, his archnemesis was a fat bully.

curiously enough i was so passionate about this project even though i had no idea what i was doing and no talent that i actually did like three full colored issues of it. my family was really proud of me. sadly those comics are completly lost to time

andrew and the monkey (age 10)

this was the classical story about a boy and his best friend the talking animal. one page comedy strips done in pen and paper. nothing too clever, just a way for me to try lame jokes mostly stolen from spongebob squarepants. not much else to it. i tried to do like a revamp in 2014 but it was short lived, as you can see the jokes didnt get any less lame

FIP industries (age 17)

mostly done in digital. yes as you can see fip is something that has followed me my whole life in quite the variety of mediums. there were as a matter of fact multiple attempts to make this comic a real thing but time and again they would peter off as i saw that my skill was just not up to the task. i think i have talked more than enough about fip industries on this blog, one interesting thing is that if you follow the link you will come across a lot of proto ideas that i had before they cemented and took their definite shape in the novel (and even after the novel i kept retconning and retooling things over and over again, fip industries is an ongoing thing that will probably last my entire lifetime)

Disregarding Reality I (age 20)

the first iteration of disregarding reality, a humorous strip done in pencil and paper, a fairly short lived affair, lasting no more than 3 months. the entire premise of the comic was an MRA activist and a feminist live together, they are friends, they argue a lot. remember 2013 guys? back when this whole politics bullshit truly kicked off online? this was before gamer gate, mind you. but by that point i had seen more than enough of it on tumblr and i was like “someone should do some scathing commentary with wit and penache” and that someone had to be me. mainly inspired by commics like f@nboys and el goonish hive and a thousand billion others that were so popular back in those halcyon days.

i got bored of it pretty quickly and it wouldnt be until three years later than i would finally decide to re-start the project but until then...

Strangers in the forest (age 21)

here comes a rather productive era in my ouvre, ink and paper, based on a short story i wrote, its about an eldritch monster pretending to be human and a ghost girl, killed by her father. they have a dispute because the monster wants to eat the corpse of the girl but the ghost doesnt want to give up her bones because its the one thing that tethers her to the mortal plane. they eventually resolve their dispute. by this point i was actually, unironically trying my best to do comics which i felt looked professional.

Song of a nightmare (age 21)

another one based on a short story i wrote. ink and paper, a private detective wakes up in the middle of the night and sees a mermaid lying in bed next to him. he spends most of the comic trying to figure out how the hell is this possible. still one of my favourite ones and certainly one of my family’s and friends favourites as well. a rather poetic tale, strongly inspired by argentinian fiction and their propensity towards magical realism, i was reading a lot of cortazar back then.

Aika (age 21)

as you can tell i was on a fucking roll that year. ink and paper, this was a story based upon a simple and basic idea that i had in my mind for years and years. i always liked the concept behind the movie “the kid” where bruce willis mysteriously comes across himself as a kid. so of course one day i came up with the idea, what if you recieved a visit from your future self... but she was a woman?

this is probably the most aggresively trans story i ever wrote in my life, it is literally about a guy realizing they are trans and breaking down over it. here is the giant kicker, i did not realize at all what i was doing. i was completly unaware of what was going on here, i was still deep deep in the closet and not even realizing i was there. it really is astounding the honesty and the rawness with which i wrote this comic and it went all over my head. a perfect example of “im such a great ally lol”

oh also there is time travel i guess. my main impetus (beyond whatever my subconcious was forcing me to do) was my desire to make a complete clusterfuck of a story, i was a huge fan of homestuck, i had read fleek and demon, i wanted to do my own take on a hypercomplicated time travel puzzle plot. other things came out on top of it but i didnt noticed them. fucking hilarious

Hello Agatha (age 21)

a comedic strip about a wacky pixie dream girl having wacky adventures with her wacky friends, one of which is a man with a toilet for a head. what a gut buster, what a knee slapper!

there is not much to say about this one, wacky surreal comedy was always my favourite and so time and again i would try my hand at it but it is surprisingly hard to do!

The /co/ ventures! (age 20 - age25)

an ongoing project done in multiple mediums. i think i said more than enough about this in here and here. it was me practiscing comics, practiscing my humor and adding my tiny grain of sand to the 4chan culture. i am proud to say these comics were actually very well liked there and that i would be recognized without a name or signature of any kind, just on the strength of my style.

the vest kind of madness (age 22)

probably one of the projects in which i put the biggest amount of effort to make it look professional. traditional inks and digital colors. a crossover that i cant believe never happened in comics considering how obvious it is. Rac Shade, the changing man and delirium of the endless, the two flagship vertigo characters associated with madness. clearly a match made in heaven.

to this day im flabbergasted i seem to be the only one to think of this.

Disregarding Reality II (age 23)

another work where i have already spilled rivers of bytes explaining my thought process behind it. after having a no good, terrible, very bad day, finding my self aimless and without purpose, deep in denial and depression, i decided to give my self a big project to have something to get me out of bed every day. these three guys came from the depths of my mind to save me.

this time leaning a lot more on silly humor and surrealism than political commentary, still insanely proud of how much i managed to make this last, almost three years, well over 200 pages! and in here i found the inspiration and the creative energy to tackle all sorts of diverse projects of which we are about to see all about.

Mama Bird (age 24)

my masterpiece.

by far the best comic i ever did. a kid with a bird for a mom. hilarious, touching, heartbreaking. it was a concept that i had come up with when i was 21. back then it was supposed to be exclusively a humorous comic strip but then i found a dramatic angle for the story and that was when everything clicked into place. that was when i realized this was a comic i had to do. and i did it. it took me five months but it was well worth it. still insanely proud of this one

Soft boys (age 25)

a weird experimental little story where i decided to sit down and deconstruct one of the most popular superpowers. super elasticity. more akin to me just mashing my toys against each other than me trying to tell a serious story. i am actually really happy with some of the art here and some of the sequences presented. particularly the final one where a brick joke twenty pages in the making finally pays off.

Hexen Snatch (age 25)

a semi spinoff to my novel FIP industries, we focus on a side character that managed to survive after the events of the novel and how they’ll manage to survive further beyond that. insanely soaked by the magical world of pact by widbow i wanted desperatly to share my own take on magic, every page is accompanied by a little text where i expand upon the lore and the way magic is supposed to work on this world. i really like the prose on those snippets and the ideas they work almost more that the comic itself with which i was not happy at all when i was working on it. i didnt like the character design, i didnt like how the art in general was coming out, i didnt like the pacing of the story or how superficially we were getting to expore this world in the comic proper. i had to take a very long hiatus just to accumulate the will to finish the comic and once i did i feel it really petered off without much of a satisfying payoff.

on some level i blame the exhaustion and frustration that i came out of this comic with for the fact that i ended up quitting disregarding reality soon afterwards.

Maxplosive (age 26)

another project that has followed me across multiple mediums. came up with an idea for a videogame back in 2015. saved it on the back pocket for a while, used it as a story within a story on my novel fan.tastic, practisced a couple of animations with the characters and eventually decided that, if my skills at videogame making were not enough, i had at least more than poven myself as a comic artist so maybe that was the definitive medium in which this idea would have to exist.

the original idea was to tell the story in two parts, the first half would introduce the character and the videogame as if the comic was a playthrough of the game. all fun and childlike and innocent. then the second half was meant to explore the life of the main character as an adult, how being “a videogame protagonist” had ruined her body, her mental health and her life. i tried all sorts of weird stuff with the format here, using reciclable assets, static camera angles and generally presenting the whole thing as if it was a videogame.

sadly the project got too big for my breaches, i was fucking exhausted back then, swamped with a bunch of other projects, my job, other responsabilities, unsatisfied with the story and with no idea where to take it. eventually i got tired, decided to skip a day, then the day became a week and then the week became a month and by then i had to face the facts, i was just no longer able to continue the comic. and so i quit not only maxplosive but disregarding reality all together.

i still did the occasional comic here and then but it wouldnt be until the very end of 20-fucking-20 that i was finally inspired to tackle a new project, my newest one, my last one....

Lapsarian (age 27)

an interesting experiment, i decided to do the whole comic in one sit and then post it chapter by chapter on a weekly basis. a surprising result of this was that i managed to do in one month the same amoung of pages that would have taken me 5 months back when i started disregarding reality, is good to see that after al this time i still got it.

took me a while to get the hang of it again and find my own style once more but once i armed up it was smooth sailing for 40 pages all the way to the end. but what is this comic even about?

its... weird, with full disclosure and no shame, it is mostly a fetish story about big lizard creatures commiting vore. the milkman had already shown me that i could do those types of stories and no lighting would come from the heavens to strike me down so i said, why not as a comic? i like to think that beyond the fetish content it is still a decent story in its own right, an interesting feedback that i got from this is that people are suprised how earnest it is, one saying something like “this is the best pitch for a fetish that i was never interested in”

Conclussion:

looking back on this im surprised, turns out i was a lot more prolific and working a lot more regularly than i expected, in here are documented ten years of creative output that never seems to wane. it was fun to do the roundabout trip and see how my style, my technice and generally my work ethic evolved through the years. another nice thing to see is the multiple formats, the multiple tools and mediums i experimented with, i find myself constantly trying new things, new methods, new angles, new interesting ideas for how to make a comic (without even getting into what to make a comic about).

something i always knew about myself was that drawing is a fundamental part of who i am, it is something that just cant be taken away from me and that will always be a part of my life one way or the other, is good to see it so plainly, in black and white, on this list. here goes for what i might be able to do in the future