#my ahjussi meta

[morninginsp]

slippers, symbolism and budding romance in my mister

This show is rife with symbols and actions that have underlying meaning because these two characters have gone so long without expressing real emotions to other humans that they are super bad at it. One of the symbols in Dong Hoon and Ji An’s relationship is that of the slippers she gave him once her feelings had started growing beyond the platonic realm into something deeper and more romantic.

Dong Hoon knows deep down that to accept and wear these slippers would give a signal to Ji An that his feelings too are not those of merely a friend. But what is also curious is that he never throws them out or tries to return them to her. He simply lets them sit in his drawer as he contemplates what to do next.

When in episode 11 when Dong Hoon confronts Ji An about taking back the slippers, it makes sense that her main question to deflect his rant is, “would you have worn them?” These slippers are a physical representation of an intimacy their relationship probably shouldn’t have, which due to the narrative structure of how they both have reacted to the slippers is agreed upon by both of them. So what she’s really asking is: would you ever be able to proudly wear your relationship with me in the face of scrutiny?

So since Ji An believes that she has made Dong Hoon uncomfortable, she retracts her feelings, both verbally and symbolically, and what is interesting is how virulently opposed Dong Hoon is to her doing this. He tells her that he wants to maintain a relationship with her, that losing her is a bridge too far. He even uses the word “begs” when it comes to having her not give up on him. At the end, he demands that she get him some new slippers. Aka, he wants her to give him back those feelings of intimacy that she had started to share with him. He’s not sure where she fits into his life just yet, but he does want her there.

Therefore it is no surprise that he has another violent reaction when the slippers reappear, but she is gone. Because for Dong Hoon this ability to express his emotions has been building as the series goes on, and that Ji An gives him back the symbol of her affection but physically disappears at the same time worries him. Because he knows she cares deeply about him, but her actions trouble him and disrupt the expected flow of his life. What if he’s lost his chance to tell her that her feelings are reciprocated? That he truly appreciates what she’s given him.

How do we know these feelings are reciprocated symbolically: he starts wearing her slippers by the end of the episode. He has decided to confront his relationship with her head on, and he takes her side. He is no longer worried or ashamed at what other people think about them. He also probably wants to feel physically closer to her since she has disappeared, and the slippers offer the perfect vehicle for him to do so.

Which is a long winded way of saying: by wearing the slippers, Dong Hoon has accepted his feelings for Ji An are not those of a friend, and he is ready to confront the repercussions for his feelings once others find out about them.

@chiwawha @shadowofdarkness22 @parkdonghoons @leeji-ans

[drivingsideways]

Kdrama reviews/meta master list

Updated: 28th Dec 2021

Meta! 

In Search of a Better Dream 

Kdrama women I love and the fic that should exist for them Part 1 Part 2

Shows!

2020 Reclist (incl Life, Stranger/Secret Forest, Hyena)

Misaeng

My Ahjussi/ My Mister

Into The Ring

Beyond Evil

The Devil Judge

Melo is my Nature/ Be Melodramatic

Mine

Deserter Pursuit

Nobody Knows

Chief of Staff

2021 Kdrama Year in Review

If X were your Y: K drama edition!

If Kim Hye-soo were your girlfriend (with bonus if Kim Go-eun were your girlfriend)

If Koo Kyo-hwan were your boyfriend

If Jung Eun-chae were your girlfriend

[toraberaa]

2019 Recap

7 countries and 17 cities:

🇨🇳 Shenzhen, China

🇭🇰 Hong Kong, Hong Kong

🇲🇴 Macau,  Macau

🇧🇳 Bandar Seri Begawan, Brunei

🇲🇾 Kota Kinabalu, Malaysia

🇰🇷 Seoul, South Korea

🇰🇷 Suwon, South Korea

🇰🇷 Paju, South Korea

🇰🇷 Anyang, South Korea

🇰🇷 Sokcho, South Korea

🇰🇷 Ansan, South Korea

🇵🇭 Cebu, Philippines

🇵🇭 Bagac, Bataan, Philippines

🇵🇭 Guagua, Pampanga, Philippines

🇵🇭 Angeles, Pampanga Philippines

🇵🇭 Olongapo, Zambales, Philippines

🇵🇭 Manila, Philippines

4 mountains:

⛰ Mt. Kinabalu, Malaysia

⛰ Mt. Seorak, South Korea

⛰ Mt. Canumay (unclimbed), Rizal, Philippines

⛰ Mt. Sipit- Ulang, Rizal, Philippines

How was my trip this year?

1. Which was your favorite place you visited?

Difficult question. Maybe traveling to South Korea during summer. Although it was my second time, it was a different perspective and vibes.

Seoraksan

Sokcho Beach

2. What surprised you the most about how people live there?

I was surprised about the people who live in Kota Kinabalu. It’s very much like Philippines, my home country, particularly Mindanao. The weather, the food and people were look like Filipinos too or they are REALLY Filipinos. Sometimes I used or spoke Tagalog there. In fact, Kota Kinabalu have Filipino Town. After all, Kota Kinabalu is just one sail away from Zamboanga city as they said.

3. Were you able to pick up some of the local language?

Well, we know Malaysian uses “lah” a lot in daily conversation as if it’s a period. Well at Sabah, under same country, if you were not yet aware, there’s a noticeable slang word. Instead of “lah”, they used “bah” word. My Malaysian friend also confirmed this. Maybe that’s where the name Sa-“bah” originated. Haha!

4. What was your favorite neighbourhood? 

Hmmm. Bandar Seri Begawan? It was very unique vibes. It shows how religious they are. It speaks for discipline. Some may say that Brunei is a boring country. There’s no nightlife here. Their night market closes around 8-9 pm already. Alcohol and cigarettes are banned here and strictly for drugs. Mall doesn’t offer much. Walking around midnight here is safe. It is quiet. No noise can be heard. It is said to par with Singapore and Japan when it comes to security. If what you are looking for are similar like those, then you are in wrong place. It doesn’t try hard for tourism. For what I saw, this place is for settlement. To build up a family with strong ties. To raise children under good social provision. Well, if you asked me, I like it to live this way.  Way of life is simple. They study, work, and gave their praises back to their god. After all it is called The Land of Abode of Peace.

5. Was the country/city like you expected it to be?

Macau for its bright neon lights, casinos, egg tart, beef jerky and etc. What you heard or read about Macau is what you get.

6. Did the places you visited remind you of anywhere else?

Hong Kong is a small bustling country like Singapore to me. While Disneyland HK matches with Universal Studios Singapore. Also, Brunei and Laos when it comes to serenity and religious people. Muslim for Brunei and Buddhism for Laos. Macau is to Las Vegas (as if I already went to Vegas) so.. maybe Pasay City near NAIA? Hahaha! Kidding!

7. What was the most memorable meal of the trip?

Shenzhen-Hongkong- Macau: Food trip with my Chinese friends

Every meal was memorable with them because there’s a story in every meal. One unforgettable instance was that every time I ordered some meal in the menu. I asked them if this was “traditional” food. So when we will order food, they will always say “traditional” like the word “Itadakimasu!” was replaced by it. It became our word for the rest of the trip. I don’t know. It is still funny when ever I think about it.

  Suprise birthday celebration for Tina. It was simple. But for the effort how we hide the wine and cake and how we planned and executed it was perfect. And how we crossed some miles to spend and celebrate birthday for her.

Sheng ri kuai le Tina!

Beef jerky fest at Koi Kei in Macau. Before we left Macau, we wanted to brought some souvenirs (pasalubong). We decided to buy beef jerky. There’s a lot of variation to choose. They offered free taste which was good. So good, that they offered so much, you can even try other products enough to fill up your tummy or until you give up.

Seoul

I didn’t ate a lot in South Korea. Don’t get me wrong. I love Korean foods. However, I didn’t felt any hunger when I’m traveling. Maybe so fascinated on my trips that I forgot to eat? or maybe just saving some Korean Won? LOL! Anyways, although I haven’t done food trip. Most of my memorable meal was in South Korea.

이모 – Imo (Auntie) of Gwangjang Market –  I was strolling and can’t find a food that enticed me.  Actually, the menu and price were same as the others that there’s no need for me to circled around the market twice. Until, I saw someone’s food that makes my tummy growled. Imo waved at me and happily welcomed me in her mini stall. The couple seated beside me was kind too. We had a chit-chat and talked that they went Philippines before (Boracay). There was another foreign couple seated beside me. (forgot where they came from but they are westerners)  I became their translator because I know and understand some Korean words. We toasted some makgeolli (Korean rice wine) together. Korean style!

Kamsahamnida!

TL;DR: Imo offered me some food and drinks for free. Just to “try” them. She was happy to saw that I ate it. To pay back, I said delicious in Korean. And that make her more happier. I feel like I’m a stray dog waiting for someone for me to be adopted and fed to perform some tricks. I felt bad because I felt cheated on a taxi on that day.  But이모 reminded me that good people exists too. Hospitality at its best.

Breakfast at my hostel – There were two Ahjussi (아저씨) that owned the hostel. They offered me free foods – rice, kimchi and ramyeun; and coffee. Just wash the dishes after eating. The best part was it wasn’t just free. But, they were also the one who cooked it for me. It feels like your parents served you a meal. They are sooooooo kind and friendly. It feels like home.

Lunch at Sokcho – Philippines is also rich when it comes to sea foods. But every sea food that I ate at Sokcho was my first time to try. Flounder fish, king crab, krill and lots of fish that I don’t know. Like what I also said before, best to eat with local so I ate it in Korean style.

Lunch with Jooyoung 🙂

Early Dinner at Songtan – It was my pre-birthday celebration. So my Korean bestfriend’s (Jooyoung) treated me. She also gave her gift to me.  Talking about how “memorable” it was. I slipped some noodles and stained my clothes.

8. What was the highlight of your trip?

I think climbing Mt. Kinabalu was the main highlight for this year’s trip. It was one of a kind experience. I had a good taste of what high altitude was. It was very challenging. All aspects of my body were challenged – Physically, mentally, emotionally as I climbed alone, spiritually as not to be confident to myself  but to be confident with God and financially as it was expensive.  It feels like a pilgrimage as it leads to personal transformation. Conquering great mountain like Kinabalu makes me feel like that every problem, no matter how big it is, can be overcome.

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9. Would you re-visit anywhere you went?

YES! Definitely yes, except Mt. Kinabalu? Kidding, might as well try Walk-the-Torq next time.

10. Will you go back to see other parts of the country?

Yes. There are still many to discover and to explore. And even if I already explored it. I will definitely go back to visit my friends from the other parts of the country.

11. Would you ever consider moving there?

Hmmm. Honestly, I have a thought before moving to and working at China and South Korea. But now, maybe the chance had decreased. Well, who knows.

12. Did you encounter any problems during your vacation?

Hong Kong

I was hold and interviewed when passing from Shenzhen to Hong Kong border. I remained composed and calm. I believed there was nothing to worry about. I just answered honestly any questions they throw. It was just a hassle to stay there for an hour.

At the borderline

Another one was when I was at the Disneyland. When we were waiting for the gates to open, a sad news was delivered to me. My auntie was in shock state or coma. Irony was that, I’m at the said happiest place on Earth yet I couldn’t hide my sadness and tears.

Brunei

I went to Brunei during Ramadan and you can’t eat nor drink in public during fasting month. So what’s the big deal about that? My trip in Brunei will began at Friday. And every Friday means that there will be a prayer (jumaat) from 12 pm to 2 pm. It is because Brunei is under Shariah law. So even you want to eat in private, most establishment were closed. Even if they were open, they will also be closed early.

Public transport was rarely used in Brunei. Maybe because the price of oil was so cheap that they can also afford car. In that case, I have to walk kilometers to my next destination. To add a challenge, it was summer. It was too hot. Sometimes, I needed to go back again since the spot was closed.

It feels like I’m trapped at Brunei. Good side, I had a company to talk about our miseries.

South Korea

I guess, it was also South Korea who tops this round. It’s because not only during but even before the trip. I will list it down.

Before vacation

I thought my Visa will not make it. I mean it was just approved weeks before the flight. Whew!

Stated above, I haven’t book the flight to Jeju and the slot for DMZ (Panmunjom) was already sold out. It was a blessing in disguise as I have to explore Seoul more and booked DMZ tour on the day which was also the 25th Korean War Anniversary.

I had a bad dry cough. I brought my medicines to South Korea to get better.  I was worried that I might deported back due to my illness.

During vacation:

My flight was delayed. As usual.

Because my flight was delayed, I missed the last train (AREX). So I took late night bus. Good thing, before it left, I’m able to catch it. Bad thing was, the last stop was only at Seoul Station (still far from my hotel)

Since, my flight was delayed and missed last train ride. I took taxi at Seoul Station. I knew some taxi driver wouldn’t follow the meter. Like the last time I went here. When I rode a metered taxi, the Ahjussi told me to step out and referred me to other cab. (private car) Here, I bargained. Good thing, I knew some Korean phrases and got 25% off of the offered price. I didn’t argue much because it’s already late and I was tired.

My flight was delayed, missed last train ride, rode expensive taxi. Another problem arise. I already contacted the home keeper beforehand that my flight will be delayed. He said that he will just leave an envelope along with a key on the counter so I could self check-in. I searched the whole area, but there were no single envelope nor key I seen. I was worried I might suspected as a burglar. Anyways, I tried to call him again. No luck. I had ideas running at my mind. It’s either I will stay at PC bang (computer cafe/shop), noraebang (videoke) or jjimjilbang (water spa) or..stay at the living room with full of large mosquitoes. Yikes! Few minutes passed. Another guests arrived, from what I could tell, they were also Filipinos. Was the accent really noticeable? However, they said, I look like Korean. (well..) Anyways, we teamed up and thank God we were able to contact the house keeper and able to rest.

Got scratches and developed a wound on my feet due to back area of the shoe.

Almost missed the bus ride to Sokcho. We almost ran the whole city to catch up.

Thought it will not happened again, we almost missed again the bus ride back to Seoul. Some people really never learned lesson. LOL. 미안해

13. Did you have any bad experiences?

Hmmm. None. Only what I stated above. Looking at the bright side, it really makes my trip memorable.

14. Did you meet any interesting people? 

Too many!

Shenzhen

Finally met Tina’s girlfriend, Kris Lee? Oda Lee? She got a fierce aura.

Brunei – Stayed at the same hotel with me

Bob from Netherlands. My roommate.

Rose from Netherlands also. She stayed BGC (McKinley) for 10 years and have a brother married to a Filipina.

Lotha? (Didn’t know the correct spelling) from Netherlands too. She was proud to ate balut but doesn’t like chocolate peanut butter pie at McDonald’s.

Athena Zhang – Beautiful and sexy Chinese girl raised in Atlanta, US. Met her again at Kota Kinabalu at the same hostel also. Amazing isn’t??

Rachel Zhao (Yi Zhao) – Chinese girl from Tianjin. Same name as my friend. I love talking to her. She had a sense of humor and very interesting girl.

  Kota Kinabalu

The Escape Backpackers owner (Ate – I forgot the name) – She cooked breakfast everyday, listened to my stories. Even laughed at my funny (corny) jokes (HAHA!) and showed motherly love. She sometimes go to Philippines (Paranaque). She visit her Filipina best friend and do charity services. She gave school supplies to homeless children.

Valerie – The cute receptionist. What I know about her was that he go-to-go for dresses and gown is Divisoria. She said that dressmakers in Divisoria are better and the dress have cheaper price.

Brother John Bryan Dora & Sister Shirley Dora from Local of Kota Kinabalu who offered me a prayer for my guidance before I hike Mt. Kinabalu.

Bro. Levi of Local of Kota Kinabalu – Very kind man and entertained me. Who also assisted me to grab a taxi way back to hostel.

My Mt. Kinabalu tour guide – I thanked him for watching over me and helped me to reached Mt. Kinabalu peak.

My Laban Rata’s roommate – Sadly, I forgot their names. They are also Malaysians, but from Kuala Lumpur.  I befriended them. We shared same hardships on Mt. Kinabalu. One memorable thing, was that they asked me to lead a prayer before we sleep. Furthermore, my agency arranged that I could share the trip way back to hostel with them.

Seoul

The kind lady of Gwangjang Market

The two ahjussi of Isak Livingtel

Our tour guide for DMZ – Youn. She’s so professional and so cool. Lots of information I never read or heard from book nor internet. I learned a lot about Korea from her.

Bro. Alvin? of Local of Ansan  who also prayed for me for safe travel.

My brethren from Local of Seoul and Ate Christine who welcomed me and offered also a prayer. I feel like a celebrity like Kristel Fulgar when I visited there.

15. What souvenirs did you buy?

Keychains and ref magnets from different cities. Certificate of completion from Mt. Kinabalu was another treasure. Maybe one of the prized souvenirs I bought was the wire fence from DMZ and the shirt. As per my guide, you can’t buy it anywhere. Available only at DMZ. Another one was the train ticket to Pyongyang, North Korea. Additional item for collection was The Little Prince book perfume.

Thanks to God! Thanks my friends for the support, cheer and prayers. I’m still alive.

How to use it?

16. What was the best food you ate during your vacation? 

I can’t think anything particularly. Maybe the sea foods I ate at Sokcho.

King Crab

from top counter clockwise: Squid, oyster with sesame sauce, sea pineapple.

Shellfishes

King Crab Ramyeun

17. What was the most enjoyable thing that you did during your vacation?

I can’t say if climbing Mt. Kinabalu was the most enjoyable thing that I did. Haha! Maybe spending 10 bucks at the casino in Macau and felt like we were winning.

18. What was the most interesting thing that you did during the vacation?

I hunted down all I Seoul U location. If you are curious, you may refer to this link. Also, I searched some K-Drama locations and imitated their pose.

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19. What was the best trip you took this year?

Hard to say. Too difficult to choose. But you know that my theme for traveling this year is to visit and meet again my friends who resides from different parts of the world. So, to saw and met them again was already enough for me. Travelling together with them was a bonus treat.

20. Next stop on your bucket list?

To complete East Asia and South East Asia countries. Japan and Myanmar for next year. Perhaps Dubai. 🙂

A lot of memories flushed in after I answered these. I decided to post it separately. wait for it. 🙂 Thanks for this questionnaire. Without it, maybe I can’t compose anything.

Thanks for reading. Have a happy and prosperous new year. More travels for us.

Cheers!

Meet Me at World’s End 2019 Recap 7 countries and 17 cities: 🇨🇳 Shenzhen, China 🇭🇰 Hong Kong, Hong Kong 🇲🇴 Macau,  Macau…

[morninginsp]

Yo I’m gonna need that catalogue of scenes that make you think he’s fallen for her 🙌🏻🙌🏻🙌🏻🙌🏻

So I’ve gone back through and decided to narrow it down to 5moments (really you could say any time they shared air in episode 12 and thatwould be accurate) plus one that was completely unconsciously done before hestarted to grasp the situation he found himself in, and I’ll explain therationale behind each.            

Pre realization: When he goes to buy out her debt and endsup beating Kwang Il to a pulp (and in turn getting pummeled himself). This oneI would argue was when he was mostly unconsciously doing it because he hadgrowing feelings for her. I don’t think at this point he had any idea of thebreadth of his feelings for her. However, he did know that Ji An getting beatup by this jackass was completely unacceptable, and although I believe thiscould be completely platonic and more family oriented if the future momentshadn’t happened, there was some elements of him having complex feelings thatled to this moment.

Moment one: When Ji An’s grandmother tells him how gratefuland at peace having him in Ji An’s life makes her feel. This was definitely thefirst, oh shit moment, he had. Dong Hoon is not a dumb man. He has known fromthe beginning how this relationship might be perceived from the outside, whichis why he told her that he shouldn’t keep eating meals with her, but I don’tthink he had to come to terms with his own feelings on these perceptions untilnow. Beyond the communication gap, I do believe he was momentarily stunned bythis perception, and how it didn’t completely fall outside his own feelings forher that led to him just accepting it instead of trying to refute what wasbeing said. (Yes there’s also an argument that he just didn’t want to break hergrandmother’s heart, but he was a little too struck by the statement at thetime, in my opinion, for that to be the main factor which keeps him quiet.)

Moment two: The entire engineered scene by Ji An where shebaits him into hitting her because she confesses her feelings for him. Irewatched this scene earlier this week, and oh man, it is really reallyuncomfortable to watch. There are a lot of emotions at the surface and theviolence in this show is always so realistic that I was highly disturbed on therewatch. YET, if he didn’t feel anything, he would not have reacted like that.She struck the nerve that had been exposed by her grandmother earlier in theepisode and played him to a tee. But if you watch his face when he realizeswhat is going on, it is clear he wants to run as far away as possible fromthese emotions. Oh she does like me, I was planning on dealing with my emotionshere by burying them so deep they never see the light of day like I always do.DONG HOON DEAL WITH YOUR EMOTIONS IN A HEALTHY MANNER THAT DOES NOT FALL FORTHE MECHANISMS SHE WANTS YOU TO. Especially since it involves violence. Anyway,if he didn’t reciprocate, I could see him being very gentle with the let downhere. As he’s not, I would say there’s something going on under the surface.

Moment three: (God this is getting long; I have a lot offeelings clearly.) Oh hey that scene where he tells her that he won’t fire hereven though she wants him to. I’m just saying, he gets really worked up oversome slippers you guys. I mean, I too would get very worked up over theslippers that my totally platonic friend took back after a nasty conversationwhere I didn’t handle myself very well and then demand she re-gift me some. Andreally this scene is just an extension of that moment when he realizes they aregone, and it clearly upsets him. Which is to say, he doesn’t want her out ofhis life and he desperately needs her to realize that. When he demands she buyshim new slippers, I was like O-KAY THEN. You are in no way telling her that youdon’t want to throw away your relationship and that it might mean somethingmore than you’re willing to actually say at this moment as you’ve realized shemeans a lot to you. Ji An being the champion that she is totally falls evenmore for him because of this.

Moment four: When after reliving the events of his wife’sconfession in his mind and his subsequent emotional breakdown he physicallyreacts to her presence on the street corner. If at any moment his response toher should be at its most muted, it would be here after thinking about how muchhe is hurt by his wife, and yet he follows her with his eyes (I’m not gettinginto the scene on the train but THE WAY HE LOOKS AT HER that she then callsout, oh my god, Ji An my darling, how are you still standing??) and actuallysits up to maintain eye contact. The yearning; it was so real. Their connectionwas so palpable in that scene, and he plays such a huge role in it. Even as heleans back, it’s like oh wow, I am IN THIS. This girl is living under my skin.Yes Dong Hoon, have emotions, they are not evil.

Moment five: It’s actually much smaller than the othermoments. When he’s scanning the area for her outside Joon Hee’s bar hoping she’llturn up when he’s chatting with the neighborhood boys. That was when I waslike, you’re not even trying any more sweetie. You’ve accepted your fate. He sowanted her to appear and that aching feeling is so delicious; and again, if itwas strictly a platonic relationship, his face wouldn’t have been quite ashopeful and distracted as it was. Concerned, sure, but that mixture of longingand hope, not so much. (Props to Lee Sun Kyun’s face which gives so much awayin minute expressions totally in line with his reserved character.)

Bonus: WHEN HE FUCKING SMILES AT HER WHEN SHE CALLS HIM AGOOD PERSON AND LOOKS BASHFUL. Sorry that was unacceptable. DONG HOON. You knowshe’s fallen for you, her heart eyes alone squeeze my heart painfully (also let’snot discount the heavy lifting IU does in her micro expressions in this dramabecause they SLAY me), and yet you think it’s acceptable to blush like a schoolboy over her sweet compliment while you’re eating and drinking together. Do youwant me to fall for this nonsense? DO YOU???

Anyway, those would be the main moments that I think suggesthe’s probably fallen/falling for one Lee Ji An, and he has no idea what to doabout.

Other worthy moments: when he says that she knows him and itmakes him sad, when he calls her a good person for caring for her grandmother,when he refuses to fire her after the incident with the assistant manager, allthe moments he refuses to say anything about their relationship while beingprepped for his interview, when he realizes she stayed in the office withouthim to help the team finish the report, and then when they have theirconversation that includes intense eye contact before she runs off due tophotographer dude, and then he FUCKING CHASES OFF THAT PHOTOGRAPHER DUDE ANDHOVERS PROTECTIVELY OVER HER LIKE A BAMF and then walks her home despite herprotests she’d be fine. And the actual concern that plays across his face inthe split second we see it after he finds out she got called in for theinterview. To like name a few more.

Final thought: these moments are building now more quickly.I don’t think that’s just a coincidence.

[morninginsp]

let’s talk about dong hoon and ji an post episode 7

Oh wow, so I just finished rewatching episode 7. And I have some THOUGHTS. (If you’re obsessed with this show, and not rewatching it, get on that because you’re going to see so much more than the first time around.)

This episode is incredibly pivotal to how the rest of the series shakes out, and I’m going to glance over a couple important plot points that don’t revolve directly around our leads’ relationship and then dive into that.

In this episode we have the following important plot points to not really talk about: Joon Young is threatened by exposure of the affair by Dong Hoon which ends up with a confrontation on the rooftop that Ji An overhears, Yoon Hee finds out that maybe her idyllic affair isn’t quite as rosy as she thinks courtesy of our girl Ji An, Jung Hee lies to the brothers about her finding a new place to live and in general we start to see some of the depth to her backstory, and then Ki Hoon and Yoo Ra are like fighting? I don’t know. I honestly could care less about whatever is going on there, and I fast forward through their scenes.

Let’s start with Ji An, my precious murder princess, who goes through a whole host of emotions over one Park Dong Hoon in this episode. Ji An starts out this episode realizing she is falling for him, and when he gets all paternal on her, she shuts that shit down quick. Ji An is not here for you to give her some paternalistic pity shit. I think she heard alarm bells going off between the advice about her grandmother and then him accepting her demand for dinner so quickly. So that she forced him to truly state his intentions in a way that gave her credit, and not him, I think pushed Dong Hoon to reconsider any unconscious choices he was making in regards to her (MORE ON THAT LATER).

However, she is initially relieved when she is given a break on her assignment to spy on Dong Hoon because at this point, she has fallen onto his side of this spat so hard it’s almost comical that Do Joon Young doesn’t figure it out for like another two-three episodes. Her snips in the car when he rescinds his request to back off about having better things to do than listen to Park Dong Hoon were both precious and super defensive. You literally chased this man around the city last episode on your day off to make sure he didn’t do anything rash. Look at your life, look at your choice, Ji An.

She’s very careful in how she presents her information, and when she actively realizes how this could blow up in Dong Hoon’s face after Dong Hoon and Joon Young fight on the roof, she takes steps to mitigate the damage by finding a way to end the affair without Dong Hoon getting involved by physically getting hit by Yoon Hee to drop the truth bomb about Do Joon Young on her.

We also get her twisting around her relationships to try and get Kwang Il to back off, and you can’t tell me that when he asks if she’s gotten an older man to take care of her she’s not thinking of Dong Hoon instead of Joon Young who’s actually giving her the money. That Kwang Il then sees them sharing that meal at the end of the episode only adds icing to the cake of Ji An’s less than platonic affections for this man.

Not that I think she was in any way wavering in her support for Dong Hoon for a while now, but when he gives her credit for saving him from Joon Young’s schemes and then buys food for her grandmother after their not-date, I think it’s safe to say, there’s no way she’s not head over heels deep in love. He actively disarms all of her defense mechanisms, and it is truly a delight to watch.

That she immediately recognizes the significance of him asking after her and then running to him. Top Five most romantic moments in this show. GAHHHH.

OKAY let’s talk about Park Dong Hoon who had a bit of a roller coaster of emotions in regards to Lee Ji An this episode. So I do think that some part of him is and always has been intrigued by her, but I do think that moment on the subway was one where he was like, she is young and a bit inexperienced and that halted a couple things for him for a hot second. Even the way he talked to other office dude about her was a bit more paternalistic than some of the other actions we’ve seen out him. He is definitely playing a bit of a hero at the beginning of the episode for her.

I also tend to believe if she wasn’t so forthright on making him consider why he’s helping her on terms that do not allow him to play the savior, he could have unconsciously built a wall around her that doesn’t allow for any blossoming romantic feelings to flourish. Since she stops that shit in its tracks and continues to make him consider her as a full fledged person and not just someone to save, I do think that lays the groundwork for him to consider her as something more to him. (I see him throwing out that he “saved her” a last ditch attempt by his brain to fight off her not fitting into the appropriately “safe” category it would prefer.)

This is one of the first episodes where I noticed a decent amount of unconscious straying to her on his part. Like he’s becoming more and more aware of all of her actions and very much tracking her with his eyes in a way that is clearly not intentional.

HOWEVER, let’s come to the end of the episode and where we can all safely lie to rest any fears that Dong Hoon doesn’t think of Ji An in a romantic context. He has just finished an intense conversation with his boss where he essentially dares him to ruin his life. Take away my marriage, take away my job, take away any respect anyone has for me, and who will I be? Ji An, bless her soul, goes about immediately counteracting these rash declarations, but Dong Hoon doesn’t know that.

So where does his mind stray when he goes to contemplate the end of his life as he knows it: to Lee Ji An. Subtle foreshadowing she is his future is actually very subtle. When he asks if she’s stopped in, he’s asking, has she thought of me? Has she thought of me so much she would come back to where we shared a moment? Because I’m thinking of her, and he’s given an out to not elaborate on who he’s looking for, but he just keeps going. (He also acknowledges she’s pretty out loud and in general reveals that he pays a lot of attention to her physical appearance.)

When she shows up at the door, he looks struck. She’s out of breath because she ran to him; he’s out of breath because she came. And then if they don’t share some of the sweetest moments, I don’t know what you’re watching. The way they keep sneaking glances at each other and soak in the silence and comfort just having the other one near provides: it’s very platonic obviously.

Just the way they both react when they catch each other’s eyes at the end, okay maybe a bit amusing if it wasn’t followed by them both looking down at the table and blushing like they’ve never had a crush before. This whole scene is out of some middle school handbook on flirting just with alcohol.

He likes her. He finds her attractive and intriguing, and she consumes his thoughts to the point that he actually verbalizes to another human being that is he is wondering about her and if she might have given any indication that she feels the same way. He’s obviously not as taken with her as she is with him, but how could he be? She has this huge advantage on getting to know him, and yet, he’s still falling for her because he feels a connection with her that is soul deep.

So when I think of them as soulmates, I think about how even before they truly got past each other’s defenses they had this connection that overcomes a million obstacles to get them to share a beer and smile shyly at one another while not knowing exactly why they were so drawn together and a matching set as of yet. All that other stuff, that comes later, but this moment, this is purely about their connection and how they bring peace to one another in a way that is both foreign and magical to the other.