#mutual feelings but their personalities and baggage are keeping them from admitting/acting on if..

[paunchsalazar]

Good Omens 2 rewrite comic… piece of cake!

[adashofniallandasprinkleoflunacy]

Supposedly 

A/N: this was a request sent in that inspired me a lot for some reason and i figured i’d do it cause i haven’t done any demon!h and demon!reader in a while so i gave it a go and I’m pretty happy with how it turned out :D enjoy!

Anonymous: This may be too cutesy for them, but do demon!harry and demon!reader ever cuddle after they fuck? Or they fall asleep separately but wake up in each other’s arms and just try to play it off awkwardly 

word count: 4.5k

content: some angst but nothing major, fluff, mentions of nudity, and some cocky asshole demon!h because that’s his Brand laidese and germs!!

///

Despite the emotionless, unattached agenda demons tend to uphold, let it be known that Harry didn’t really mind what was happening at the moment. 

On the surface level, from an outside perspective, this definitely doesn’t fit the bill for what is expected from his kind. Cuddling is an action reserved usually for real couples that have a sentimental bond, which he and Y/N are very much not. He’s not even quite sure what they are, really. Their relationship— if he can even call it that— was born out of three very important, adequately limiting notions: a mutual understanding, the desire for a convenient warm body, and sheer boredom. 

Nothing more, nothing less. 

The mutual understanding was that neither of them wanted a genuine significant other, given what they are, so it was established that feelings were to be kept out of this arrangement completely. Emotions lead to complications, complications lead to a falling out, and a falling out would be inexplicably messy considering that they’ve shared the same friend group for well over a decade now and neither are willing to let a booty call mishap ruin that. Feelings stay dormant, end of discussion. 

The desire for a convenient warm body is pretty self-explanatory— Harry and Y/N had known each other for a while now so there was no annoying getting to know you phase, they both agreed that they found the other attractive, and they both live relatively close to one another so it was a pleasant set-up with minimal issues. Harry could shoot her a text at three in the morning and she’d be at his place in less than five minutes, or vice versa. There was no spending hours at a bar trying to pick someone up, no time wasted learning what the other person likes and dislikes, and certainly no fretting over birth control tactics to keep up appearances— they were both dead, which is a morbid advantage but an advantage nonetheless. It was easy access, easy fun, and easy clean-up. 

The sheer boredom aspect was just that. It had started on a drunken night out with friends, where— by a series of fortunate events— Harry and Y/N had ended up together post-bender, sitting in his car in the parking lot of a club. They had been waiting for him to sober up to drive them home and she had made a passing comment about not wanting to turn in for the night quite yet. He’d blinked at her sluggishly, absentmindedly reaching over to tuck a rouge strand of hair behind her ear because he was getting secondhand irritation from it tickling her nose. He’d spoken up, voice numb and thick from the alcohol. “What do you wanna do, then?”

Y/N had glanced over at him, eyes half-lidded as they had raked down his lean tattooed chest, his unbuttoned silk sheer shirt leaving very little to the imagination. When she’d pinned her gaze back up to his, her eyes had inked black as they’d flitted to the palm of his hand for a second, a suggestive glint washing across their reflective surface as the corner of her pretty mouth had quirked. “I have a decent idea of exactly what I wanna do.”

And now here they were, with many restless, heated nights, ruined bed frames, and rumpled sheets littering their past, as well as their immediate future. 

And here Harry was, slowly blinking awake after one of those said nights, cruel scratches itching across his back as they finish up healing, an empty content still bubbling at the pit of his stomach. 

His lashes flutter open as he inhales a large sigh, flinching at the bright sunlight filtering its way through the lightly swaying curtains. The only sound in the room is the soft thrum of the air vent at the far corner of the ceiling, alongside Y/N’s soft, rhythmic breathing. 

In his barely conscious state, Harry goes to do what he always does the morning after he’s spent a night doing Y/N’s back in: he goes to stretch. He does most of the work more times than not— courtesy of his dominant tendencies— but she always gives him a run for his soul. Anything he dishes out, she usually returns with the same amount of energy and will. Last night hadn’t been any different and the ache at the bottom of his spine and along his inner thighs proves it. 

Harry instinctively goes to lift his arms above his head, reaching for the top of the headboard to use it as support. He is stopped cold when he realizes a foreign weight is keeping one of his arms pinned to the bed. 

He knuckles at his eyes with his free hand, ridding them of the last residues of sleep, and then drags his palm up his face and through his mussed curls to comb away his disorientation. He cranes his sore neck to the side and downwards, eyebrows jolting up in surprise when he’s met with a wall of fluffy, tangled, mandarin-scented hair. 

Harry lifts his head up slightly, neck straining to see over the back of Y/N’s wild halo to make sure that the image before him isn’t some type of exhaustion-induced mirage. 

It’s odd for her to be so near him— she usually likes her space; says that being too close in proximity for too long is irritating. It’s why she usually sleeps with her back to him at the other end of the bed, and why he’s gotten accustomed to giving her the majority of the mattress space. Despite the fact that it’s his flat, she’s stubborn, hard-headed, argumentative and frankly, he’d rather just forfeit the extra leg room instead of bickering for thirty minutes just to end up losing anyways. It’s gentlemanly, in a sense. Minimal, but it’s something.

Given Y/N’s general disgust for excess contact, it’s no shock as to why Harry is utterly baffled right now. He’s about ninety-eight percent sure she’d fallen asleep all the way across the expanse of his sheets so how did they willingly end up here? How did they end up with her bare back pressed to his chest, her legs intertwined between his, and his arm wrapped almost protectively around her waist, wedged between her hips and the bed. 

Harry would never outright admit it but...he’s not necessarily mad about it. 

As he lays there for a few more seconds, absorbing the situation with an expression of pensive dismay pinching his face, he slowly comes to terms that he’s actually starting to enjoy this.

The warmth of her smooth skin gradually undoes the knot of confusion between his brows. The sensation of her back flushing against his chest as it rises and falls with her breathing erases the unease dipping the corners of his stinging mouth. The way she’s started to unconsciously rub her calves gently up and down his own makes the last traces of unsettlement melt off his face, replaced by an appearance of subtle affection, lips parting in blank wonder. 

Harry relaxes back into the plushness of the mattress, eyes remaining glued to a blissfully ignorant Y/N. His thoughts are scurrying around the inside of his skull, attempting to get accustomed with this new experience, having a difficult time arranging into place. He’s aware that he seems to be taking easily to what’s unfolding, but there’s an unsteady bubble inflating in his chest. He knows that if he lets himself dwell in this too much, it’ll end up biting him in the ass later, most likely as a wave of undealt emotions and crippling loneliness; that’s baggage he’s spent too many years compartmentalizing for it to all just come bursting out. 

All those decades of locking away his issues are in danger of resurfacing, and all for some harmless hugging? Doesn’t seem like a fair negotiation, and he knows plenty about negotiations. 

However, he can’t seem to make himself pull away. 

Especially not when Y/N suddenly shifts in her sleep, turning onto her other side so that she's now facing him, snuggling deeper into his body and tucking her head into the junction between his neck and collarbones. Her annoyingly soft, hot lips smear against his throat, settling into the dip at the center where a pulse would normally be present. The feeling of her exhales washing across his cold skin sends a wringing down his spine, a hushed “fuck…” escaping his dry mouth as the warmth behind the gesture spreads upwards, spilling redness into his cheeks and along the shells of his ears. Her hands come up as loose fists, pressing between his pectorals lightly, her own naked chest flushing against her forearms. 

Surprisingly enough, her supple chest isn’t at the forefront of his mind at this instant. Instead, he’s focused on the intimacy they’re sharing in this moment, unbeknownst to her and stressfully beknownst to him. 

Harry’s free hand acts of its own accord, coasting upwards towards her face and moving her chin over a bit until his palm can comfortably nurse her jaw. He rubs the pad of his thumb across her bottom lip slowly, every ridge and bump sending miniature shots of electricity surging through his veins, his eyes falling shut at this strange form of pleasure he hasn’t felt in ages. 

Y/N just looks so beautiful like that, in such a vulnerable state that he knows for sure no one else has ever gotten to witness— at least not in a very long time. 

No one else has gotten to see the way her lashes sit atop her cheekbones so delicately, her face soothed by sleep, not a wrinkle or grimace in sight. She looks as if she were made of porcelain, her features nothing short of perfect. No one has gotten to witness the way she mumbles a handful of incoherent, groggy words, her mind lost in a meaningless dream, or the way her nose twitches in the cutest manner as a draft from the air conditioning runs across it, causing her to sniffle. No one has seen the way she gives into his touch, her face cradling deeper into his hand, chasing the uncommon gentleness behind his demeanor and it hadn’t occurred to Harry that maybe— just maybe— she’s craving this type of innocent bliss, too, though he’s certain she would never confess to it if she were awake. 

Harry runs his hand down the slope of her bruised neck and across the curve of her shoulder, tracing the teeth marks he had left the night before. The tip of his fingers follow down the incline of her torso, wriggling around her side, his wrist resting upon the faint dip of her waist. He cups her lower back with his large hand, borrowing a moment to appreciate the way it fits flawlessly. He then leans forward some to give his reach more length, his digits carefully trailing up the middle of her spine, the action timid and tranquil. 

He looks down at her from over the tops of his colored cheeks, chewing on his bottom lip nervously as he continues to lull his fingers up and down her back. Y/N releases a shy whimper of gratitude, her whole body bathing in a light shiver. She does like it.

Harry swallows thickly, moving away a few locks of hair off her shoulder with the tip of his nose, glassy jade irises studying her facial expressions to make sure she’s still asleep. He puckers his tingling lips, pressing a bundle of chaste kisses to the fading bite marks on her staticy skin. If his heart still beat, he feels like it would be glowing right now. 

He tilts his chin up, settling it on top of her head and sighing in satisfaction as he feels her steady breathing wash across his Adam’s Apple, her flyaway hairs tickling his nostrils. 

He decides to stay like that for a while,  just basking in her company within this tender setting that he knows he probably won’t receive again anytime soon. Harry lays there, limbs woven between Y/N’s as his black-polished nails scratch gently at her back, swimming in his numb thoughts. 

After what feels like hours— but is realistically just ten minutes— he goes to gingerly shift the arm stuck beneath her body, trying to regain some circulation. Y/N stirs, resulting in him freezing in place to prevent a mishap, his mouth finding her warm forehead and placing a lingering kiss between her brows. It eases her. 

Harry waits five minutes before trying again.

He manages to escape this time around, lifting his arm above his head and twisting out the cramp in his wrist, then folding it behind his head. He allows his eyes to shut once again, intent on spending a bit longer milling in this bubble of domestic peace.

His plan is shattered to pieces by an alarmed, angry sentence. 

“What the fuck?”

His eyelids fly open, ice materializing across his entire nervous system. 

Shit.

Y/N launches upwards, sitting up rigidly with her face contorted in startled repulsion, clutching his blood red sheets to her chest as her hair stands up in tousled tuffs. “What in Lucifer’s red, barren hell are you doing?”

Harry now has two distinctive routes to pick from: confess to partaking in the unorthodox cuddling, or fake it and say he was asleep as well and that it had all been an unintentional mistake. 

It’s hardly a choice. 

He flings his arms away from the other demon’s body as if sickened, shooting up into a seated position and slouching back onto his palms, a look of agitated horror plastered across his sleepy, handsome features. “What do you mean what am I doing? What the fuck were you doing?”

Y/N blinks at him as if he’d just stabbed her between the eyes with a demon blade, irises momentarily flitting black with nerves, the area under her waterline webbing with dark veins. “What do you mean what was I doing? You were the one with your arms around me!”

Harry narrows his sight at her pointedly, thick brows furrowing with faux resentment. “You were the one with your head snuggled into my neck and your hands on my chest!”

“You were the one kissing my forehead!”

“You were the one rubbing up on my legs!”

“Because you were close to me!”

“Because you rolled over here!” 

“No I didn’t!”

“Oh, so what?” Harry snaps sarcastically, drawing forward and crossing his arms over his chest adamantly. “Did an angel sneak in and place you there? Because as I recall, you always sleep on the left side of the bed, so what were you doing on the right?”

Harry’s accurate counter renders Y/N speechless, her mouth parting quizzically as if waiting for a response to magically appear. Her eyebrows cinch down begrudgingly, the gears in her head spinning on overdrive, trying to piece together an appropriate rebuttal. Her grasp tightens on the blanket covering her bare body. “Well, I...I don’t know—I don’t think I—”

Harry cocks his head to the side expectantly, loose curls falling across his forehead as he shrugs his brows with a condescending air. He mimics her with a high-pitched voice. “Well, I— I don’t know— I—I don’t think I—I—I—”

Y/N’s face goes sour as heat floods her cheeks, fire threatening to spark across the tips of her sizzling ears. She yanks the sheets off of him, holding them with one hand as she uses the other to begin crawling across the bed towards the edge, a haphazard defense thrown over her shoulder. “Shut up! It wasn’t on purpose!”

Harry scoffs in dark amusement, not even bothering to cover himself up. He bites into his cheek to keep from exploding into a round of triumphant laughter; he can’t believe he managed to turn the tides so quickly. “Oh, so you admit it was you, then?”

Y/N dismounts the atrociously tall bed, stumbling over the long linens as she desperately searches for her clothes. “No! I’m just saying that whatever happened, it didn’t happen intentionally!” 

“Obviously.” The brunette demon snorts, shaking his head for subtle emphasis, crossing his ankles offhandedly and returning both arms to the place where one had been prior— tucked behind his head casually. “What do you think we are, mortal?” 

“Of course not.” Y/N agrees quickly— a little too quickly, which hints to Harry that she might be trying to cover something up. Perhaps she wasn’t as disgusted by this as she had led on…

He watches as his friend— he uses the term lightly— shuffles around his room, peering at the floor in an determined quest to find her jeans, underwear, and black lace blouse. Or maybe she’s just hellbent on avoiding eye contact with him. 

“Y/N…” His tone has lost its arrogantly mocking edge, softened by what she can only decode as...guilt? 

She ignores it and doesn’t answer, nearly passing out in relief when she spots her panties and bra hanging off the doorknob to his closet. She snatches them swiftly, panning her gaze around the rest of the room for her leftover clothes, spotting them in a pile sticking out from underneath the opposite corner of the bed. They’d probably gotten kicked there in the heat of the moment. 

Harry repeats himself a little louder, adding onto his comment to try and stifle some of the embarrassment radiating from her. “Y/N, you don’t have to leave. You usually stay for breakfast.” 

Y/N scoops up her outfit, settling it into the crook of her right elbow and squaring her shoulders as if ready to brace a hellhound. Their gazes lock and he feels his stomach flop when he sees the vulnerability she’s obviously trying to hide. She’s good at it, he’ll give her that, but if he stares intently enough, he can just make out the traces of conflicted longing leaking into the disinterested facade around her pupils. 

“It’s fine, Harry.” She sighs heavily, her tone drastically different from the unkempt girl that had been floundering about just seconds ago. She’s now calm, cool, collected, and scaringly so. “I have somewhere to be later. Meeting someone to close a deal.”

She shrugs one shoulder indifferently, grabbing a handful of the sheets arranged around her figure and pulling away, dropping the bedspread at his feet and leaving herself completely nude. 

And there she is, the Y/N he so well knows. The same one that uses sex appeal as a shield. 

She’s managed to spackle the cracks that had appeared in her typical barrier of heartlessness, her confidence and ease leveling off once again. She places her clothes on top of the crumpled sheets, picking out her cheeky bright red panties from the heap and working them up her tempting legs. Harry can’t help but notice the hickies covering her inner thighs, as well as the finger prints staining her hips. 

Y/N catches him ogling, smirking to herself now that she has her composure back in order. She hooks her index finger around one of the straps in her bra, lifting it up and bouncing the lace lingerie in front of him teasingly. She raises her eyebrows at her lover provokingly, a sultry air pouting her lips. “Think you can help a girl out?”

Harry licks at his slightly chapped lips thoughtfully, eyes flickering between the article hanging off her hand to the sly grin decorating the edges of her pretty mouth. When he speaks, it’s low and thicker than usual, accent heavy. “Of course, pet.”

His legs thunk emptily off the bed and onto the floor, a small grunt catching the back of his throat as he pushes himself up onto his feet. He is most definitely sore. 

His footsteps are soft against the carpeted ground, faltering as he rounds the corner of the mattress. 

Y/N eyes his every move, suckling her bottom lip at the way his muscles flex and contract under his sun-kissed skin. She doesn’t let herself wander below his waist though; she’s never one to pass up flaunting her power of will. 

Harry stops about a foot away, taking the bra from she is offering and holding it out for her to slip into. She does so at a mind-numbing pace, her toes curling as she feels his warm fingertips running the material up her arms and onto their designated spot on her shoulders. He tugs at the hooks gently, pinning them into place and tucking the tag in, exactly how he’s seen her do countless of times before. 

He then runs the palms of his hands up her arms, sighing softly at the silky sensation of her skin and giving her shoulders a dismissive squeeze. “All done.” 

Y/N turns on her heels to face him, looking up innocently through her lashes, lips quirking into an easy smile. “Thank you. Such a gentleman.” 

Her playfully seductive personality is unbearably contagious, seen in how Harry returns her action with a coy scoff and a simper of his own. “For you, always.”

“Well…” Y/N turns her lower half to the side, showing him her ass for significance, which is covered in the unmistakable print of his hand and rings. “I wouldn’t say always.” 

Harry’s pursed lips break into an even wider shit-eating grin, his cheeky laughter echoing across the walls of the apartment, his arms absentmindedly folding across his broad chest. “Yeah, well, you can’t say it’s one-sided, can you?”

He points towards his neck, stretching his chin upwards so that she gets a good view of all the fading love bites she’d left there the night before. 

Y/N’s giggles match his. “Touché.”

Harry rummages through his drawers as she finishes getting dressed, shimmying into her tight jeans and throwing her shirt on, finger-combing her hair into a decent state. He comes up with a pair of maroon briefs, slipping them on as he walks back towards her, letting the elastic band snap into place against his lower abdomen. 

The two demons with benefits stand before each other, Y/N with her braided black sandals swung over her shoulders and Harry with his hands fixed on his hips nonchalantly. 

“You really can’t stay for breakfast?” Harry inquiries one last time, lifting his eyebrows curiously. “I’m making those cinnamon bun waffles you like so much.” 

Y/N sighs grandly, clutching her chest dramatically as if it physically hurts her to decline his offer. “I’d love to, but work is work. Don’t really have a say.” 

Her friend nods in understanding, well aware of the truth behind her words. “It is what it is, then.” 

“However...” Her sudden continuation makes his head perk. She reaches up, carding her fingers into his messy curls and combing them back from his face, tucking a handful of rebellious ringlets behind his small ears and giving him one final self-assured smile. “Do y’think you could maybe save me two and I can come pick them up tonight?”

Harry cranes his head to the side, placing a slow peck to the palm of her hand and then biting into her skin jokingly, a certain lewdness painted all over the deed. “I think that can be arranged.”

“Great.” Y/N quips happily, wrapping his curls around her knuckles roughly and hauling him in for a sloppy, dirty kiss that leaves his teeth numb and his face buzzing. 

Once she breaks their mouths, lightly panting with her skin a darker shade than before, he has to blink three times in order to reign himself back in. His ability to form coherent sentences right now is about as useful as alphabet soup; he just gives her a jerky nod instead. 

Y/N wipes at his swollen lips with the pad of her thumb, giving his cheek a playful pat. “I’ll see you then, H.” 

Harry can’t tear his eyes away as she leaves, his bedroom door clicking shut behind her, the soft, distant thunk of his front door accompanying the sound a bit later. 

Fuck, that was something is the first comprehensible thought that registers in his mind. 

It was absolutely something and who knows how differently it would have gone if he had admitted giving into the weakness they had both sworn off of. 

That notion haunts him for a while— the idea that he could have driven her away for good if he had confessed that his emotions had bleed through their arrangement. Sure, it had only been this once, but Harry has a horrible gut-wrenching feeling that he’s unlocked a box deep in the back of his skull that won’t easily be chained down again. 

He thinks this over again and again as he prepares his morning meal, the looming uncertainties of it all causing him to check out of reality here and there, resulting in a few burn marks across his hands and two charred waffles in the bin. 

As Harry finally sits down to enjoy the food that had nearly not made it to his plate, he finds himself mentally running through the awkward encounter he and Y/N had faced this morning. He can’t stop himself from dwelling on the expression he had seen crack through her eyes earlier— one that showed she seemed to be feeling the same kind of emotional turmoil he was. It opens too many unanswered questions for their future and he hates himself for being so worried when nothing had truly happened. For all he knows, it could have just been a trick of the sunlight that had been streaming into the room. He’s getting himself out of sorts for nothing. 

However, as he goes in on a forkful of his cinnamon-glazed pastry, one pesky detail suddenly launches him into a coughing fit. 

It was so minuscule he had missed it the first fifty times he had run through the events, but it had decided to prick him in the brain now, the weak dam of reassurance he had built crumbling to ashes.  

After Y/N had woken up, saw what was happening, and their fight had ensued, she had made a comment about how Harry had kissed her forehead. 

On the surface, it had seemed unimportant because yes, that is exactly what he had done. The problem arose when he remembered that she had been dead asleep when he had done that. 

Supposedly.

He had gone to remove his arm from below her body, she had fussed a bit, he had pressed his lips to her forehead to ease her, and she had remained asleep for a while longer until he decided to finish removing his arm. That final motion was what had awoken her.

Supposedly. 

If she had been unconscious the whole time they were cuddling, then how did she know he’d kissed her?

[strayfreckles]

all on you.

☕︎︎ hwang hyunjin x reader (ft. ryujin, felix, & yeji); highschool au, friends-to-lovers au, barista au, bulletpoint fic.

maybe you would’ve gotten out of highschool with your emotions (and pride) unscathed if it weren’t for hwang hyunjin and his so-called romantic, obnoxious—and, in your case, unfortunately effective—antics.

includes: fluff, angst (especially in the middle), mutual pining, somewhat slow burn (?), gn!reader, barista!reader, a hefty amount of swearing, the only consistent thing you’ll see here is how utterly terrible this is, fluctuating humor

notes: this was requested by a wonderful anon! before you dive in, i’d like to inform you that this is my first fic of any kind, so please tread gently 😔✋ though constructive criticism is appreciated !! hope you enjoy (and hopefully not cringe too much sdkdnkdks) <33

wordcount: 2.8k

let me be the first to say that you absolutely abhor romance films with every existing fiber and cell in your body.

like, you cannot physically withstand the atrocity that is occurring right before your very eyes and you have to tear your gaze away before you bash your head to the nearest table.

and though you do admit that you’re overreacting sometimes

you also admit that you’re a massive dumbass for falling prey to one of the most common—and one of the most infuriating tropes—that is falling for your best friend.

yeah, hwang hyunjin? that boy holds your heart between his palms and with every smile you fall deeper and deeper

you’ve known that kid since you started eating crayons in elementary, and since then you’d been attached at the hip, clung to each other through all the clownery of middle school

finding each other in places is like a sixth sense; it only takes you both less than a minute to find the other before startling them with a quiet “hey, you”

but time is impatient, and that timid, starry-eyed boy you knew became the dimpled heartthrob come highschool—geared with the smarts and the talents and love-laced words that sent boys and girls running after him

but to you he was always just that kid who nearly consumed clay cakes because “it looked so real!”

until he wasn’t

it just came to you like a blow to the face, in the middle of sophomore year, sitting on hyunjin’s bedroom floor on a weekend trying to cram revise for your upcoming exams

you decided to take a quick break, and made the mistake of looking at hyunjin

and my oh my was he stunning

every laugh that tumbled from his lips sounded like a fucking symphony

and the bastard was just playing with kkami !!

he looked so damn soft as he planted kisses on his coat

every single constellation you knew was embedded in his irises

haha heartbeat go brrrrrrr

and maybe all you wanted was for him to never stop smiling, because he looked the most beautiful when he did, and maybe you wanted to brush his hair away from his face because you couldn’t see his eyes all that well and what the fuck—

you just malfunctioned

because that was your best friend

he noticed you staring, of course, and had the audacity to smirk, and in a second you wanted to set yourself on fire

“y/n, i know i look good, but at least try to be subtle.”

“you look like a low-budget minion, hyunjin.”

“i’d rather be a minion than a shabbier version of gru, thank you.”

(many fists were thrown that day, and hyunjin learned not to pick fun at your clothing lest that he face humiliation)

for the first few months you were in constant denial, even going so far as to blame hyunjin himself for forcing you to watch countless romcoms on your weekly sleepovers

but once you catch hyunjin staring at you with that fond look in his eyes, one he’s carried since childhood, your heart finally has the courage to murmur into the concaves of your chest, i am in love

it gets worse around senior year

the summer after junior year you land yourself a job at miroh café, a coffee shop at the heart of the town bc you’re broke as fuck and you need the cash

and, as expected, hyunjin becomes a frequent patron

he’s armed with a pickup line every single time he orders

and every single time you have to tell your heart to calm the fuck down he’s always been like this c’mon gimme a break

it’s even gone to the point where the regulars mistake him as your boyfriend

and as if your conscience nagging you 24/7 wasn’t enough mental baggage, your coworkers and fellow seniors, felix and ryujin, decided to weigh in

“if that isn’t the look of someone who’s simping over you then i don’t know what is,” ryujin nudges you, and from the repetitive force you’ve sustained from the past week you’re surprised your ribs aren’t bruised yet.

“you act like you’re not in the same dance crew,” you scoff, “ryujin, he flirts with everyone—he even had the balls to hit on chan!”

“let me remind you that denial is always the first stage of falling in love,” felix chirps, cheerful as he replenishes the pain au chocolat in the display.

“and let me remind you that i’m holding a very hot cup of coffee straight out of the machine; ‘accidents’ can happen, felix.”

of course, you weren’t in denial—you’d been past that stage long ago

it’s just that you didn’t wanna give yourself false hope

you didn’t want to lose this beautiful thing with him that’s lasted for nearly a decade because of your stupid emotions

so you’ve trained yourself to remain indifferent to the many compliments and lines he sent your way, hoping that if you could fool the others into thinking he didn’t affect you, maybe you could fool yourself, too

but oh ho ho, do i have some news for you (☞ ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)☞

you don’t know how hyunjin’s pulse speeds up whenever he sees a handwritten note on his coffee wishing him good luck

you don’t know how often he forces himself to stop staring at you whenever you’re not looking

you don’t know how stupidly happy it makes him when he sees you smile

especially when he’s the reason why.

maybe everything about you makes hwang hyunjin happy

and maybe if you weren’t so kind and gentle and considerate during the times he lost a competition then maybe he wouldn’t have fallen this hard

but you were (and still are)

during the times you cried from laughter at all his antics

or cracked a smile at one of his pickup lines

he’d think that maybe—just maybe—he could stand a chance

but every time he did, he’d spiral into self-doubt

because there’s no way you would ever fall for him

you’re the kindest, most talented person hyunjin has ever known who deserves the universe

and he’s just… him

even if he did plan to confess, he’d be putting everything at stake; you’re too important to him, losing you would be a loss too heavy for him to bear

so he’s content with playing this role

even if the idea of you being with someone else hurts him so much

he’s content with reminding you everyday—even if it isn’t direct—that your mind is like no other, and that anybody would be blessed to have you

you both think it's always going to be like this

with you struggling to keep your feelings from showing

and hyunjin battling his inner demons

and those left to perceive the “discreet” ogling across the room and the hidden yearning in your voices are none other than (you guessed it!) felix and ryujin 🤩

it was funny the first few months

but now it’s just plain frustrating and they want nothing more than to bash your two oblivious heads together because y’all !! are !! idiots !!

no matter how much they persist, they’re always met with either a sad, gentle smile with a shake of the head or a monotonous “ha. you’re really funny.”

both have considered dropping your asses but they can’t because they love y’all too much

so all they can do is hope for a change

and change does indeed arrive when september rolls around

dance practice has just ended and hyunjin feels hyped because it’s movie night and he can’t wait to cry to kimi no na wa again

and lowkey stare at you for the entirety of the film

he exits his dance crew’s studio and is about to go straight to 7/11 for snacks when he spots the team’s newest recruit by the road, waiting for a ride home

hwang yeji’s only moved here two months ago and in a short span of time she’s already become one of the well-liked kids at school

but she’s a kind & humble sweetheart who deserves all the love & attention !!

so being the good sport he is, hyunjin approaches yeji with the brightest grin, having only talked to her a few times prior

“hey, there! yeji!” when the girl turns to him, her smile looks and feels like liquid sunshine. “waiting for your date?”

yeji turns rosy when he asks, like she does when everyone teases her about her special someone, who she’s been crushing on for weeks and who she finally had the courage to ask out. “c’mon, stop that. i don’t even know if they like me like that—they probably think it’s just another friendly date.”

“they’re a fool if they don’t end up liking you after, then,” hyunjin quips, hoping the bitterness doesn’t seep into his tone and wishing he has half the luck and strength yeji has, and she laughs.

“you know them, actually.”

“oh?”

“yeah! y/n l/n?”

oh.

o h

hyunjin can only blink at her dumbly, feeling like a thousand arrows are digging into his skin

you… with hwang yeji?

is that why you asked about her the other day? because you like her back? and that her feelings are far from being one-sided?

watching a dark cloud loom over his features, yeji thinks about asking if he’s okay when he blurts out an inaudible excuse as he walks away, zooming past the convenience store when he does

when he heads off he doesn’t even look at where he’s going, relying solely on muscle memory

he feels like he wants to grow smaller, biting his lower lip and clenching his hands into fists

he doesn’t even know why he’s upset

you were never his to lose

why would he regret what couldn’t be in the first place?

when his feet instinctively halt in front of miroh café, all he can do is stare blankly at the glass doors, at your figure behind the counter

but he wills himself to move away again, and when he does he clashes with another body

“hey, watch where you’re... hyunjin?”

ryujin stares at him with her mouth half agape, and she flinches when she sees his eyes glistening, his face flushed with the shade of pure heartbreak

“did you know about them?” he’s afraid to raise his voice, because doing so would mean there’s no stopping his emotions, “about… y/n and yeji?”

the lack of response provides the answer, and hyunjin walks away from the block

that afternoon, a cup of coffee with his name scrawled on the front went forgotten on the countertop

that evening, hyunjin doesn’t show for your monthly tradition for the first time in five years

you spend the rest of your evening obsessively checking your phone for text from him, wracking your brain for reasons he couldn’t come

of course, there are multiple reasons: like schoolwork (you are seniors, after all) and the upcoming dance competition

but you know he would text you over the slightest inconvenience, so why isn’t he saying a thing?

you rack your brain for anything you might’ve done, and your chest tightens when you think that maybe—just maybe—he’s finally caught on to you

you try to distract yourself with other thoughts as you lie wide awake in your bed: like your midterm exams, the nearing debate tournament… your date with yeji

bright, splendid hwang yeji who shares the wittiest jokes in biology and has the most colorful personality around

the first time you spent time with her she made you smile so wide it made your cheeks hurt

her laugh is the loveliest one you’ve ever heard; like dewy lavender fields beneath the spring sunshine

but every time you hear it you’re reminded that it isn’t hyunjin’s laugh, that you aren’t with him and every time you realize it you wanna cry

bc yeji’s been nothing but sweet and considerate this whole time and you’re more than guilty at the fact that all her attentions will be wasted because of you and your stupidity

you barely escape the wrath of crying yourself to sleep when you finally doze off when the clock hit two am

the next day at school, you both barely even make eye-contact

even the underclassmen who’ve heard the frequent calls of your names feel uneasy when they don’t hear hyunjin’s high-pitched voice or your shrill tones

felix especially, who’s experienced the trauma of sitting in between you two at history and feeling the tension that nearly chokes him

you’re more than terrified to look at him at him in the eye, terrified that once you do you’ll realize he doesn’t gaze at you the same way anymore

something inside hyunjin aches every time he spares you a glance, because every time he does it’s painfully obvious that he’s always been hopeless

in all honesty, hyunjin wouldn’t have shown his face at all if it weren’t for the tiny thread of patience inside ryujin snapping

so here he is, inside miroh a quarter before closing time

felix’s eyes nearly bulge out of his head when he sees him, so he sends a pointed look to his coworker,

“what did you do?” he murmurs. ryujin’s eyes are sharp when she looks at him, and he feels his blood run cold.

“what i needed to.”

no, she didn’t threaten to kill his entire family, if that’s what you’re wondering

she merely gave him… a warning

so one can imagine the surprise you feel when you emerge from the staff room, and felix drags ryujin outside to give you privacy

you both remain silent once they’re gone, neither one of you moving in place

until quiet words escape your mouth, and the familiar greeting makes hyunjin’s heart clench:

“hey, you.”

he doesn’t make a sound, so you continue, the tension heavy

“you owe me three dollars, by the way. i just wasted a perfectly good iced latte with the other day when you didn’t…”

when you trail off, hyunjin opens his mouth to let out an apology, and he realizes with a start that the words tumbling out are completely different:

“why didn’t you tell me?”

“what?”

“why didn’t you tell me about yeji?” hyunjin’s eyes begin to quiver when they meet yours, “we’re best friends, aren’t we?”

your jaw tightens, i told you. best friends. nothing more. “because you worry too much about everything; if i’d told you about us then you’d—”

“y/n, we’ve been together for a decade!” hyunjin intervenes, “we’re always going to worry about each other, whether you like it or not. and this— this is… i…”

every coherent thought vanishes as hyunjin grapples for more things to say. he knows he’s being selfish, undoubtedly so, but he wants you. he wants you so, so bad. the fight in him leaves until, eventually, all that’s left to say is the truth: “please, don’t go. don’t go… with her.”

your heart is close to breaking your ribcage when you stare at his face, you wait for him to say anything, to justify why he’s said it, but when the quiet settles, all you can see is red

“this is why i don’t tell you about these things,” you grit, trembling violently. “when i do, you say— say stuff that make me believe that you feel the same way i do when you actually don’t.

“and i hate you so much but in the end it’s all my fault because i’m the idiot who caught feelings for their best friend and—”

hyunjin doesn’t let you add anything else, because his lips are on yours and you’re overwhelmed with the feeling of him, him, him

the kiss doesn’t leave any room for doubt; he’s shaking, and his legs might give out, but he wants you to know that everything he feels is real

you’re both gasping for air when you pull away, but his hands still linger on your face and he traces the edge of your mouth, and you can do nothing but pull him closer by the waist

“still hate me now?” he asks, and you chuckle breathlessly, putting your forehead on his.

“yes, very much so,” you look at him tenderly, and he yelps when you pinch him gently, “this is all on you, y’know. if it weren’t for your godforsaken romcoms, we wouldn’t have ended up like this.”

“but if it weren’t for me, you wouldn’t have ended up with a boyfriend, amirite? ow, shit— i’m kidding!”

bonus!

“oh, thank fuck,” felix exhales, looking through the windows one more time before ambling beside ryujin, who looks pleased with herself as she places her apron on the crook of her elbow. “so, spill: what did you tell hyunjin?”

she smiles, “i told him not to give up before he’s even tried anything; sometimes, there are people who are worth taking that risk for.”

just as felix is about to commend her for sounding the most wholesome he’s heard her, she adds: “and i threatened to revoke my tutelage—his ass is failing calculus so hard.”

[lizzaroona]

On the Subject of Magicstone

Alright, so I'll admit- Ducktales 2017 is the first thing I've gotten into related to all the classic Disney characters. I haven't seen the old shows, I haven't read any of the old comics, I don't know much about the old lore (I'm gonna start investigating these things though haha)

I do know some basic facts, though. Anyone has heard that this is the best reincarnation and least toxic Daisy yet. But something I've also heard a lot about is Magicstone (Magica x Gladstone) and how people have very mixed feelings about it. Again, I don't know all of the facts, but from what I've heard, Magica only dates Gladstone to get at Scrooge, developed mutual feelings, but eventually, they broke up anyway. (Maybe. There's probably more to it, or different storylines, but that's what I heard from one biased source about the ship lmao)

I don't want to take a specific side on the ship, but if Magicstone happens in the reboot, or if they allude to it at all, here are some things that I would be really interested in seeing:

Them actually deciding they like each other for who they are, and they start dating, no strings attached. They both are caring and non-toxic towards each other.

Magica starts dating Gladstone to use him and get back at Scrooge, buy over time, develops genuine feelings. This could be interesting for a number of reasons; it would be cool to see Magica get a redemption arc and change herself for the better because she cares about Gladstone. Obviously she would keep her same basic character traits, and no character is perfect (Gladstone, for example, can be pretty selfish and self-centered at times). Also to see her soften for someone just like Lena did in s1. Lena was using Webby, but we all know how that turned out. It'd be an interesting path to see the character go down the same path Lena did. Magica reforms herself, and Magicstone stays together.

Magica... Doesn't reform herself. And before I go on, that's ok! It's fun to see villains go through a redemption arc but it's also refreshing to see villains go through zero change regarding their ideals. And they stay as villains. Some characters work better that way, anyway! Magica so far is (was) probably one of the most threatening villains on the show (I say was because she wasn't much of a threat in season two. But she still has the potential and capabilities to become threatening again.)

So she uses Gladstone to get back at Scrooge, and she's being very toxic towards Gladstone. And, poor Gladstone, but there's a high chance that no one has ever liked him for him. He probably hasn't had many friends or genuine relationships, because when people seem like they want to get close to him, chances are it's only because of his luck. So of course Gladstone is gonna cling tightly to a relationship where she doesn't seem to care about that. And he'd be right, to an extent. She'd only care about Scrooge. And because Gladstone is insecure, he'd be willing to look past the glaring toxicity in the relationship. But throughout the season, or maybe a certain big moment, will help Gladstone realize how toxic the relationship is, and there can be a scene where he breaks up with Magica. It'd be cool to see someone stand up to Magica, and DuckTales address toxic relationships, since they've already done so much family representation already. We've already seen toxic relationships in regards to Magica and Lena, but seeing it in a romantic relationship would be slightly different, and intriguing to see how it plays out.

A moment where Gladstone breaks up with Magica could be a huge turning moment for her character here as well. It can act as an analysis for her as a person and how she's toxic. Sure, she's a villain, but when we think of villains, we think of big, loud, evil people. But toxicity is a lot quieter than that. While writing this I'm thinking of Bojack Horseman, who was never trying to be evil or mean, but ended up toxic and harmful to the people around him nonetheless. Magica has been shown to be both a villain who wants to defeat the world's richest duck, and as a toxic individual, who has emotionally scarred many people she's come into contact with. If Gladstone were to break up with her, it could put her in her place, and cause her to start rethinking her choices and actions. Maybe not a full on redemption, but... Backing off a bit.

And maybe you're thinking, why Gladstone of all people? How would he be able to leave Magica speechless? We'll, either Gladstone's more scary angry than we think, or... It's a mixture of the two theories. Sure the first theory already kinda was that, but I didn't plan ahead on writing this so 😅. Anyway, this pathway could be "Magica uses him, grows to like him, they break up anyway" plotline, like the biased source said happened in the comics. And that way it could show how painful it can be to cut off from a toxic person, which would be even more maturity (not saying that's a bad thing!). I've dealt with toxic people in my life, and a lot of people don't mention that when you do have to inevitably cut yourself off from them, it's still painful. Gladstone and Magica may love each other in this circumstance, but they've got too much baggage, and they're not a good fit for each other... At least not yet. That can always change, but they choose to go their seperate ways for now, and this can spark Magica's road to a possible redemption.

Or, probably the most possible option: it doesn't happen. Maybe they make a reference to it, and they interact a couple times in The Phantom and The Sorceress, but that's about it. And that would be perfectly okay too! Because we honestly don't need a ship there. But I have faith in this DuckTales reboot; they've exceeded my expectations time and time again, and they have the capabilities to tell mature stories. And this could be another one, exploring toxic romantic relationships. Or, maybe so, they could do the opposite, and make a healthy version of Magicstone. After all, this show does have the healthiest version of Dondaisy ever seen yet!

I'm not sure what to expect from the upcoming episodes, and part of me doubts they'll have time for a Magicstone storyline amongst all the Fowl plotlines. And I personally don't need one! But it's still fun to theorize and wonder what might happen between them if Ducktales does go this route.

[aughraseye]

Gurjin x Seladon

Here you go anon!

who gets overwhelmed by small acts of kindness?

Seladon. Most of her life has been practice in isolation and shutting down her own emotions and needs. She has always been a princess first, a daughter, sister, friend second. So, she’s used to keeping others at a distance and having them treat her the same. When someone does push past her walls and insist on treating her not as a title but as a person it moves her deeply, especially because very few have even tried.

Gurjin’s kindness are particularly meaningful because they do not come with an agenda, like the skeksis, and are not born from a familial bond, like Tavra. So, when he treats her with kindness, understanding, and even love she can’t help but be overwhelmed. Though she desperately tries to appear unaffected, she can’t help the color from rising in her cheeks whenever he goes out of his way to treat her kindly.

who flinches at sudden movements?

This is also Seladon. Her trauma combined with poor sleeping habits can put her on edge and make her susceptible to flinching or jolting at sudden movement. She’s also developed the unfortunate tendency to expect the worst out of situations, making her even edgier.

While this trait does fade somewhat as time goes on, and Seladon recovers from her past and develops her faith in herself and those around her, it resurfaces with exhaustion or irritation.

Gurjin tries to be there for her, act as a steadying and reassuring presence, but she usually snaps at him and that makes them both feel even worse. He eventually learns that he just has to give her her space, and make sure everyone else does too, until she can get some rest and relaxation.

who is most confused as to why their S.O. is still with them?

Both occasionally deal with confusion as to why the other is still with them. When Seladon started to show interests in his advances he figured they might have some fun together, but little more than that. As things between them kept going and kept getting more serious he wonders at his luck. Part of him is constantly waiting for Seladon to realize that she’s out of his league and call things off. Part of him is constantly surprised that she still wants to be with him.

Seladon also kind of figured that Gurjin was only interested in her for a bit of fun, but no one had ever shown such open interest in her before. It made her feel beautiful, and brave, and willing to put herself out there to take the risk. She keeps wondering when he’ll tire of her - her dourness, and fallibility, her commitment to her endless responsibilities. She’s always holding her breath waiting for him to leave her and sighing with relief when he remains steadfastly at her side.

who says the other/s would be better off with someone else?

Both have said this. Seladon often thinks that her past mistakes make her less than those who have managed to stay true to their course - especially Gurjin. He is so good, and kind, and he’s loyal to the point of making Aughra’s title for her seem a joke. Seladon thinks he would be better with someone who has less baggage - someone who has made fewer mistakes and has less to atone for. When she says this though, in moments of quiet self-depreciation or angry self loathing Gurjin almost laughs. This usually just makes her angrier, but he explains how insane it is that she feels that way. If either of them would be better with someone else it’s her. She's All Maudra, and though he’s a prince he’s rough, and uncultured, and hardly suited to her. Besides she’s as amazing, if not more so, than any member of the resistance.

They kind of go back and forth on this for awhile before sharing a moment of mutual understanding. Then they both start reassuring each other that they love each other and wouldn’t choose anyone else.

who gets surprised when they are given gifts?

Both.

Vapra culture has pretty stringent gift giving practices and combined with lots of holidays and seasonal festivals it’s not common to give someone a gift without a reason. Gurjin was the first person to give Seladon a gift just because.  So, of course that had surprised and deeply touched her. But every gift he has given since has been just as moving especially because they come without occasion. Even after being together for many trine she wonders what she’s done to make him want to give her anything at all.

Gurjin is also surprised when Seladon gives him gifts. Because she has been fairly isolated for most of her life, spontaneous gift giving is a struggle for her. That means her gifts usually follow Vapra traditions, most of which Gurjin does not know. So, he’s always surprised at when they come and what they are - because the Vapra holidays designate the gift as much as the day. Sometimes it’s a paper fan they both know he’ll never use, or a twirl of fabric he’s meant to pin to his chest, or sometimes flowers or sweets. Often the items have stories that go with them, folklore and legends that mythify the exchange. Though Gurjin doesn’t always see the connection he’s happy to listen, and every now and then when the legends shift into stories of Seladon’s childhood, he listens even closer.  Because the real gifts are the pieces of her culture, her past, and her life that she willingly shares with him.

who is most likely to break down on the other and how does their S.O. attempt to calm them down?

Either of them have the potential to break down. Seladon obviously has a lot of trauma and internalized guilt. She can as easily break down crying as she can break out in an angry fit. She’s also still in the process of learning to let other’s be there for her, so she struggles to articulate the ways Gurjin can help her cope with her feelings. Depending on what elicited her distress he either tries to give her alone time to sort out what she needs from him, or he will stay close to her using gentle and kind words and soft comforting touches to let he know he’s there for her.

When Gurjin breaks down it’s usually because of his trauma from the time he spent in The Scientist’s Lab. He tries to keep his distress subtle, and not draw attention to his sudden shortness of breath and trembling hands. Early in their relationship Seladon doesn’t notice, but as things go on she starts to realize that certain topics - the skeksis, the drained gelfing - make Gurjin go stiff and distant. When she recognizes his panic for what it is, she gets him somewhere that they can be alone. Then she holds his face in her hands and breaths with him until his distress passes. 


who is most self conscious in public?

Seladon. Again, she has significant self esteem issues from her mother constantly and very cavalierly undermining her sense of personhood and self worth. Though she is a princess and carries herself with all the grace and dignity of her position, inside she is very aware of her perceived flaws and mistakes. She always worries that’s she’s said or done the wrong things, or said the right things but looked wrong doing it.

Gurjin doesn’t really notice her insecurity in public,  partially because she’s had a lifetime to practice concealing it. But, when they are together he’s so comfortable in his own skin and treats her so well that some of her anxieties quiet. With him at her side, holding her hand, or draping his arm around her shoulder, she can relax. Though the unease never fully goes away, she is able to enjoy being out instead of feeling like every crowd is an audience she has to perform the royal part for.

who is more likely to apologize a million time for a tiny mistake?

Neither.

Seladon has a hard time apologizing, maybe because she feels she has so much to apologize for. Though in the past she said ‘I’m sorry’ to her mother almost as frequently as anything else, now the words are too painful - triggering old memories of failures, mistakes, and disappointment. So, though she may apologize when it truly needs to be said, she prefers to show her remorse, and her penitence, through actions.

Gurjin on the other hand has no problem expressing himself. While he might apologize multiple times for the same thing it’s not often sincere and usually intended to placate someone else. When he does feel an apology is merited he’ll offer a single and sincere ‘I’m sorry’ and do his best to change his behavior to reflect it.

who admits they’re scared only when they think their S.O. is asleep and how does the other react?

Seladon. She does not like to admit weakness and vulnerability. It’s something that has been hammered into her since childhood, and it’s a habit she’s not been able to break. So, she can really only admit to feeling afraid when she thinks Gurjin is asleep.

When he’s not, she actually feels very relieved though. Being able to share her fears and anxieties with someone means a lot to her. Gurjin then takes her in his arms and holds her close. He does his best to offer as much love and comfort as he can, knowing that reassuring her of his love and unconditional support goes a long way in easing her mind.

who never thinks they’re good enough for the other?

Gurjin and Seladon each struggle with believing that they are good enough for each other, but Seladon struggles far more. She has chronic self esteem issues from the way her mother treated her throughout her life. She also bears a huge amount of guilt from her actions after Mayrin’s death. She knows that her behavior caused pain, and though she’s trying to grow past it and learn her own way of being in the world, some of that remorse will always be with her. So, she worries that she doesn’t deserve Gurjin or his kindness and love.

As for Gurjin, he didn’t initially give this much thought. He started flirting with Seladon a little carelessly, thinking it didn’t need to mean anything. But when she started to respond and reciprocate, and especially once they actually got together, he realizes just how in over his head he is. After all she is All Maudra, and under normal conditions a normal Vapra citizen wouldn’t pay a Drenchen any attention. However, this comes and goes in waves and isn’t as steady of an undercurrent to their relationship like Seladon’s anxieties.

who takes a bullet for the other?

Both. Seladon and Gurjin are naturally self-sacrificing when it comes to those they care about, and they’d both put their lives on the line for the other. However, due to Seladon’s position as Maudra - one on the front lines and bargaining with their enemies - she is more likely to be put in a position to make that sacrifice.

[mrsspidermanmaryjanewatsonparker]

You seem pretty well versed in Peter and Mary Jane’s history, and I just want to ask, can you go in depth about Mary Jane’s personality? I know her history, her terrible home life, her history with Peter, but I want to know about HER. Her personality. Her dynamic with Peter. I feel these days that she’s been reduced to the “Pretty love interest” for Spider-Man, which I hate. I KNOW Mary Jane has a lot of depth and evolution as a character.

I know she’s a party girl. Fun loving. Spunky. Independent. Funny. Intelligent. Confident. But I want to know MORE about her, as a person. What else does she do in her life? How does she interact with other people? Before she got in serious relationships, did she sleep around? Was the type of gal that did drugs? Is she open minded? Those seem like weird questions, I admit, I admit, but they really help define her character. How energetic and charismatic is she? Does she completely control the life of the party?

Mary Jane has really become a character I’m really interested in, but I’ve never really seen her “Comic Accurate” personality adapted to a modern adaptation right. The closest I would say would be the Spectacular, but even then she felt too calm.

So I want your answer. I wouldn’t mind hearing an in-depth one. I know you’ve got idealized versions (And I do to, I think I can go on an essay long rant about why I think the two complete each other) but I want to hear YOUR opinion. And if you could adapt the story into the modern day, what would your idealized Mary Jane be like? How would she and Peter’s lovely history happen?

Sorry for the long, oddly specific question, but I really want to figure out MJ, and you look like you have the matching passion and knowledge to help interested fans in her like me.

MJ’s personality is tricky because it evolves over time. But modern MJ when written correctly would have, as we all do, multiple sides to her personality.

She can be goofy, funny, carefree, a party animal, a worry wort, self-deprecating, harsh to her loved ones, selfish, self sacrificing, brave, fearful (but never cowardly), ambitious, beat herself up, socially savvy, very confifident, innately sociable, can keep a secret and just about everything between all that.

 Her dynamic with Peter is also very complicated, it’s ort of easier to talk about examples you throw out at me. But I guess on a fundamental level her dynamic with Peter is all about mutual emotional fulfilment and how that is ultimately mitigates the extreme baggage that comes from life with a hero.

You can phrase it in many different ways but fundamentally MJ loves Peter because of his sense of responsibility.

In essence her Dad was her male role model in terms of a romantic partner, but in the negative. So she found herself attracted to a guy who on a certain superficial level (studious, a bookworm) was like her Dad but on a much deeper level was the polar opposite. Peter wasn’t a raving tyrant, he wasn’t a selfish dick, he wasn’t irresponsible.

She grew up under the fear of a (verbally) abusive man but in Peter she saw a guy who in spite of having a lot of intelligence and raw physical power to also be an abusive and exploitative person, instead NEVER truly abused his gifts and chiefly used them selflessly, even at personal cost.

It is not canon but a great summation of this is in Spider-Man: Reign #4 where MJ’s ghost tells Peter she didn’t love him because he could beat bullies like Flash up but because he could but never would.

Similarly in Web #6 MJ ponders how she could never marry peter due to the worry over his risking his life and how if he didn’t do that he’d have been someone she’d have jumped to marry. But then she realizes if he was someone who was selfishly going to use his abilities for fame and fortune he’d never have BEEN the kind of person she’d have fallen for.

So MJ, unlike Peter’s other girlfriends, is the one who loved him for the thing that most defined, him his sense of responsibility.

But it’s a double edged sword because in caring about him, she obviously doesn’t want him to be hurt, hence you have this brilliant narrative tension.

Wrapped up in this is the fact that MJ understands Peter’s issues with guilt and responsibility because she also renegaded upon her responsibilities and has felt guilty about it ever since because it also hurt her family.

So they are kindred spirits but whilst Peter passively stood by and let the burglar escape MJ actively ran away from her pregnant sister.* Then both of them kept that pain all to themselves for years before admitting it to one another, whilst also keeping their true personalities concealed behind public masks, meaning MJ gets that about him too.

But in confiding in one another they were able to remove those masks and be themselves in one another’s company.

You asked what else MJ does in her life. Mostly she has great ambitions in regards to usually acting, modelling, night club owning, stuff like that. MJ enjoys the spotlight and always has since she was a child.

Her interactions with most people used to be light and jokey or flirtatious. Now they are more even handed though she can be lightly flirtatious just because its in her personality.

MJ’s sex life is very much up in the air. Fans have presumed she had a lot of sex prior and after her first relationship with Peter but there is little on the page evidence confirming or denying this. Certainly she went out on a lot of casual dates.

MJ in terms of drugs is also something never touched upon in spite of her name. However the subtext of the Harry drug story implies MJ is aware of Harry’s drug abuse and she does dump him during that arc specifically when he is as high as a kite so it could be implied from this that MJ has little time for drugs.

When you think about it, between her abusive Dad and her need to maintain a facade around herself it’s unlikely MJ was going to use drugs. She wouln’t want to risk losing any control of her facade. She did smoke in high school though and later due to stress when she was married to Peter, but only briefly.

Is MJ open minded? Well...that depends upon the topic doesn’t it. She isn’t racist or homophobic. She was okay with doing a nude scene in a movie or wearing revealing lingerie on a modelling gig, only really being concerned with how Peter might feel about her doing that, so she’s no prude. She did display an initial prejudice against clones during the Clone Saga. Again what topic are we talking about.

How energetic or charaismatic is she. I mean...very charismatic and energetic most of the time. but it depends upon the situation. She’s not gonna be charismatic or emergetic after someone has died.

MJ could probably control the life of a party if she put her mind to it, yes.

Regarding the Spec cartoon, yes maybe MJ wasn’t comic accurate and more calm but in fairness everyone was because you aren’t going to present a modern cartoon with the same over the top characterization as a Stan Lee 1960s comic book. Peter was comparatively more chill in that show.

In terms of how I’d adapt her and Peter’s story and her characterization it would basically be as it was from the comics but with modern dialogue and pacing with more foreshadowing towards MJ having a hidden personality. I have mapped out my ideal Spider-Man TV series and in that you get MJ in season 2 ala her Romita era debut and then things are as they are in the comics up until she breaks up with Harry. I’d leave them separated unlike what happened in the comics (due to them repurposing an older story where they were together but that’s another issue) then have her and Peter fall in love as they did in the Conway run and break up as they did in the Wolfman run but change it from Peter proposing to MJ to asking her to move in with him.

My rationale is that in the modern day its very uncommon even for a college senior to be discussing marriage. You’d get the same thing with him surprising MJ with a crackerjack box or something but it’d have his apartment key in it instead of a wedding ring.

Additionally, I’d have her outright dump him (as opposed to the pair just not going steady anymore) and leave New York within the same story, the same story where Peter graduates, just because it’d make for a good season finale and makes the story more concise. In essence MJ just hard runs away from Peter the moment commitment rears its head.

This would lead to more of an impact in the next season when he’s dating Felicia and MJ (with no foreshadowing, which is how the comics made things happen) shows up at Peter’s door.

Again from there things would progress as they did in the comics except when we get to the MJ backstory episode I’d work her scenes from Parallel Lives into that too.

For reasons I won’t go into, for this hypothetical adaptation I’d bring the events of Hobgoblin Lives way forward in time so instead of happening when Peter and MJ are married shortly after the Clone Saga they happen shortly after Ned Leeds dies and after Peter and Felicia have broken up again. They would form the basis of another season finale wherein MJ’s role would be functionally the same as in the comic book but with two additions. Since this would be the season finale there should be some payoff for her and Peter’s relationship.

So after she, Peter, Flash and Betty formulate their plan to smoke out the real Hobgoblin MJ asks Peter how he copes with this stuff and he shows her by taking her out webswinging and we homage Sensational Annual 2007. Then later after Hobgoblin beats Peter hard he recovers at MJ’s place and she covers for him and they almost kiss before he heads off to save Betty.

I’d open the next season with the storyline wherein Peter proposes to MJ and they eventually get engaged. But instead of them marrying immediately I’d adapt loads of stories that in the comics happened after the wedding and use those to present challenges and doubts to Peter and MJ about getting married. It’d basically be a whole season about whether or not they will get married at all.

So you’d get things like the Jonathan Caesar storyline, the return of Black Cat, Kraven’s Last Hunt as the mid-season finale and the penultimate episodes would be the introduction of Venom. Obviously Venom debuted confronting MJ so there is that, but also Brock is a divorcee, the symbiote is literally one of Peter’s ex’s and a lover scorned, whom he tried to kill in a church bell tower. In the first Venom story and in my version Spidey and Venom end their first battle in that same church bell tower.

All of which is thematically juicy for an arc about relationships and marriage (because wedding bells get it).

I’d make 2 major changes though, one of which is Venom’s battle with Felicia from the second Venom arc would happen before he confronts Spidey for the first time and Peter would defeat Venom in his classic suit. The idea being that MJ makes a new version of his classic suit both because she prefers it and because it represents his true self vs the black costume which is what he’s like to be.

The classic suit = friendly neighbourhood Spider-Man/ the black suit = bad ass scary Spider-Man.

So only by being himself, by being the person MJ loves, can Peter defeat Venom this dark reflection of himself.

The story would end with Peter and MJ reunited but both clearly having doubts, as though Venom has ‘poisoned’ their future relationship.

The actual finale would mostly be an adaptation of ASM Annual #21 but with more of a focus upon the doubts each character has and unlike the comic we see HOW those doubts are put to rest. For MJ its having a conversation with Bruce and with Peter its having a conversation with the hospitalized Felicia.

Through their conversations the pair realize that rather than all the stuff they’ve been through (Venom, Kraven, etc) showing them they shouldn’t be together, the fact that they’re still together in spite of all those things proves that they can make things work. So the season wraps up with them getting married.

The next season would be a Harry Osborn centric season but MJ in response to Peter’s parents seemingly returning would seek out her sister and her Dad in jail and reconcile with them like she did in the Clone Saga.

Then I’d do the clone saga so that’s essentially going to be the same thing except obviously Peter will not be hitting any pregnant women in this version because fuck that shit. Also Peter and MJ wouldn’t leave New York although Peter would still temporarily retire as Spider-Man.

Finally I’d do a season set after the Clone Saga leading up to the pair reuniting with their kidnapped baby, Peter losing his powers and truly retiring forever, then we go into a Spider-Girl TV show.

   *This is important also because when MJ closed the door after Gwen died to comfort Peter she was choosing to do the OPPOSITE of what she’d done with her sister.

In essence Peter made MJ a better person, he made her confront her issues or helped her to do so and she grew as a result. She became a more heroic, more self-sacrificing and more responsible person. This was always the case since before they were dating Peter pushed for MJ to give a witness statement to the cops about a murder which she didn’t want to do out of fear.

In turn MJ made Peter fight all the harder. He very much needs her in his life as she has emotionally, mentally and physically saved him multiple times, see Kraven’s Last Hunt for an example.

[goldenrathians]

So, I would like to take some time to elaborate on who exactly has been cyberstalking me for the last 10 months and the context for nearly every personal post i make. I’m doing this because I haven’t ever really directly stated what happened to me beyond “my last relationship was abusive and my ex is not finished with me” and because i know she reads my blog constantly, i figure it can’t hurt to list some of her actions.

this year, i’ve done a lot of healing, gone to a lot of therapy. ive been able to distance myself enough from my ex to realize that not only was her behavior towards me during our relationship emotionally abusive, manipulative, and unfair, but that her behavior since leaving me has been even worse (harrassment, smear campaigns, lying, stalking). it took about 5 months to really even be able to acknowledge that it was abuse while we were together and that the amount of self blame i had been harboring was something she’d purposefully instilled in me. the unhealthy behaviors i’d been expressing while with her (mood swings, outbursts of anger, confusion, difficulty with overattachment) are literally symptoms of a trauma bond and began to go away almost immediately after implementing no contact. i also currently have doubts about the validity of any of her statements concerning her other exes and current partner because i know she enjoys lying and uses it as a tool to turn people against her victims. i also experienced symptoms of ptsd following the breakup that worsened when i began to fully admit to myself the extent of the emotional trauma i’d gone through (for context, i went from an unhealthy relationship with someone far older than me directly into my last one, so it was about 3 years worth of baggage).

i am capable of recognizing that not only was it good for me to be discarded by my abuser but that she only did so because i had become too vocal about my unhappiness with the way she was treating me. we fought pretty much every week because she continually neglected my needs while i tried to cater to hers and whenever i would bring it up she would accuse me of being controlling, violent, or otherwise unhealthy. she has gaslit me before (and oddly enough accused me of doing the same to her to a friend, despite me never having done such a thing) and convinced me briefly that i had undiagnosed bipolar disorder and that THAT was why i was always so unhappy with our relationship. she likes people who make her feel good about herself, and because i was no longer able to do that at a rate which outweighed my criticism of her behavior, she decided to fabricate an excuse to leave me and did so through text and would not allow me to speak about it to her for the next month. she also tried to get me to stay friends even though i had explicitly told her i did not want to do that, and when i told her i would on the condition that i be allowed to ask about the breakup or take time to express grief, she told me that she was “not my therapist” and that i was being unfair. i then cut contact with her, which began the now 10 months long (and most likely will be years long) period of harrassment and stalking.

i have dozens of screenshots saved of our discussions on discord, as well as detailed records of her activity since we broke up (all the times she harrassed me). i have evidence of her talking about me to her friends at the time of us dating in a way that paints me in a very poor light. i have screenshots of a conversation where she forced me to publicly apologize to her friend group after claiming that i was an embarrassment, which was prefaced by the phrase “i love you, so i cut you a lot of slack.”

she used my physical attraction to her as a tool on numerous occasions. first of all, she literally lured me into the relationship with it, as the one i’d had before had left me feeling disgusting and unwanted because of a transphobic partner. she learned how to make me feel whole and then used that to her advantage, because it was instrumental in getting me to stay (i believed no one else would treat me like a person in bed). sex became a bargaining chip and on more than one occasion i was told i was unnattractive or undesirable because of something i’d done, such as expressing the urge to be more submissive in bed. i was also encouraged to force myself on her sexually during a fight (something i am not and was not comfortable doing in reality), which i now realize was her way of using sex to keep me from staying mad at her long enough to raise a complaint about her treatment of me. as a result, i’ve had extreme difficulty with touch and sexual contact over the last ten months because in my head no matter who i sleep with the last person who touched me is her and i can’t escape that.

i constantly felt trapped, because i was aware on some level that people do not treat someone they love in this way, and yet any time i tried to leave she would act like she could change and treat me right. i kept staying around against my better judgement because i thought she would stop lying to me. i felt i owed it to her because she said so many people in the past gave up on her or got mad at her for being depressed. i truly thought she was a good person and that a good person would be capable of reasoning with me and we could both be happy.

she also maintained contact with the person she’d been dating before she met me, which was unquestionably cruel towards said individual. She would say hateful things about this person, yet never give them a chance to truly grow on their own and encouraged them to stay in love with her (i suspect they had a similar attachment to her). After dumping me she returned to this person only to abandon them again three months later to get engaged to someone she may have been cheating on them with.

i have proof of her lying about committments we’d made to eachother as a way to get out of spending time with me, and when confronted with evidence of said lies by people who’d witnessed her make the promise and fail to keep it, she would respond negatively and blame me, telling me i was a controlling person and then giving me the silent treatment. she constantly accused me of using our relationship as a threat in arguments, yet i never once said “if you don’t do __ i will break up with you,” only confessed that it felt like she did not want to be with me because of the lying and the refusal to spend time with me. she expressed desire to physically assault me once while angry, and made repeated comparisons between me and her abusive father, despite my voiced discomfort with being compared to men. when i once said (and immediately regretted) that sometimes i wished i could “shut her up forever” during a fight, she then began to claim that i harbored desire to physically abuse her...despite her having expressed violent desires towards me months earlier. anything i had ever said or done became fair game in an argument if i tried to voice my discomfort in the relationship.

she often compared me to her exes or to her friends as a way to make me feel inadequate or unenjoyable to be around. she would then private message me to start fights while around these friends, then accuse me of starting fights and preventing any further private communication. if i showed signs of distress publicly, i would then be “humiliating” her and she would tell her friends that i was overemotional.

She told me reasonably early on in the relationship (first six months) that she wanted to marry me. She said that since she was going to be in the military, we should marry soon so that we could live together. I was hesitant at first because it seemed strange to marry at 20 or 21. She would continue to bring it up until I said I was okay to do so. She told me in december that she wanted me to buy her a $400 bear and propose to her with it. Every month I was met with the same message of “I want to marry you.” In may, I mentioned that i might propose when she visited in july, since she had said to propose before she enlisted. She told me it was too soon and that she no longer wanted to be engaged to me. I was hurt and responded poorly, and accused her of having once again made a promise to me she had no intention of keeping. I recognize now that as an isolated incident, this was a total, blatant overreaction, but at the time i was feeling a lot of stress due to her racking up nearly $500 on my debit card and her repeatedly agreeing to date nights and cancelling last second while arguing with me if i was unhappy. She then used the military as an excuse to dump me in early june, which i now suspect was a total lie because i know for a fact she has not gone to basic yet and has been theoretically scheduled to for nearly a year. She accused me of being immature and pathetic, and told me that her life was much better without me in it. I asked her if there was someone else, which she denied, but i knew better. I had been suspecting it for a while.

since i told her to never contact me again over the summer she has:

in july, she began dating her ex girlfriend again, and told a mutual friend she had never loved me to begin with. Keep in mind that this ex was the one she’d left to date me, and that I never once pressured her to be with me. I don’t doubt that she never loved me, but not through my own personal failings. Rather, i don’t think she is capable of healthy love. She would repeatedly bring up that she did not ever love me and that I was stupid for believing her when she’d told me she wanted to be with me.

In august, i was still suffering the effects of the trauma bond and was still in love with her despite knowing she was being unnecessarily cruel to me. i couldn’t believe the person i’d loved with my whole being was the same person who was openly insulting me. I tried to ask a friend how she was doing in late july. He told me she was happy with her then partner and showed me screencaps of her doting on said partner with the same “we should be together forever” crap she fed me. I was later made aware that he would mock me behind my back with her. At the time i had her blocked on most social media platforms, but she reached out on a tumblr sideblog to tell me i was an idiot and that i should have known she never loved me and that her then-girlfriend loved her better than i could and that she had always been in love with her.

in october/early november, she dumped that person. she then began dating someone who i know has a history of low self esteem (she picks her targets like that) and purposefully liked a personal post on my blog (knowing that i would take the bait and try to directly engage her). I did. And she told me in the most condescending way possible that again, i didn’t know anything about her and that she was happy with this new person, who was everything i was not, and that i was the person who needed to grow and let go of bitterness. Please note that i had only asked why she was liking things on my blog. I told her i didn’t want to hear from her anymore and blocked her again on discord. She then reached out to me on tumblr (before i could block her there) to say “I can unblock you on my main account if you want to talk.” as though it were some kind of favor to do that to me. as though i had done literally anything besides say “i’m blocking you, don’t contact me.”

Also in november she had her new girlfriend send me messages telling me to stop stalking her, which is ridiculous because i made a rule to myself to not look at her social media back in august and had been reading about what to do with narcissists (no contact rule). The new girlfriend told me I deserved what had happened to me. I attempted to warn the new girlfriend that it was all lies, but then realized it wouldn’t do any good, so i blocked the both of them.

On january 1st, i recieved a discord call from a dormant group chat (unused for nearly a year). It was from the new girlfriend. She hung up and then posted screenshots of her and my ex together, along with a message @ing me saying that they were now living together (from long distance to cohabiting in my ex’s parents’ house) and that my ex had proposed to her. Multiple people witnessed this. It was entirely unprovoked on my part as i had not attempted to contact either of them since november. This was a post designed to demoralize me or upset me, which it failed to do because by december i was out of love and in full recovery. i had acknowledged that my ex was not the person i had romanticized so heavily in my head.

Late january, my ex posed as her fiancee on discord to message someone who was once a mutual friend but who is now only my friend. After he told her he wasn’t interested in talking, she revealed it was her and not her fiancee, made a very pitiful attempt to insult him, and then blocked him.

Early february, she contacted a friend of mine whom she had met twice in real life december 2017. she still had his phone number and snapchat, and reportedly sent him an image of a paypal receipt, which i suspect had something to do with the (expensive) items i’d requested she return to me when we broke up. This could have been innocent, but given her other patterns, i highly doubt that it was anything short of intentional because she knew he would ask me about it. I told him to block her just in case.

Following that, in early march, I recieved anonymous questions on tumblr about my relationship status. I have a brain and am able to easily spot her text speech patterns. I then installed a tracker on my blog to register page hits and responded to the ask, knowing she was bound to check for responses.

Around that time, i was made aware by a friend that someone i used to talk to no longer talked to me because of how i and my ex had treated them. i reached out because i felt like even if it was way too late at least maybe they could know i was aware i’d been shitty to them. we talked and i was told that my ex had pretty much lied constantly about my actions and that this person didn’t like me because they were under the impression that i was the abuser in the relationship. This is not the only time someone has come forth to tell me that my ex used to talk about me behind my back. I have had other friends and acquaintances mention it to me over the past year.

Since then, she has visited my page and looked through my personal tag numerous times a week, ranging from once a day to up to 6 times or more. I have evidence of her every move ever since she decided to start harrassing me back in July. I know she is likely reading this exact post. I also know she isn’t very smart, because a smart person would have stopped trying the first time they were blocked. I know that she secretly hates herself and that she represses the anger she feels because she likes to make people think she’s afraid to hurt them, but she enjoys starting drama and spreading rumors wherever she goes. I know that she probably had some sort of traumatic events in her early teens that caused her to begin serially dating/abusing people, but I also don’t really care at this point. I did a lot of emotional labor trying to humanize her up until I realized I didn’t owe her that anymore. It’s somewhat refreshing knowing that I’m allowed to speak now and that there will be no consequences. There is no relationship to lose. Anyone who wishes to challenge me is totally welcome to do so, because I have a shit ton of proof that supports my side of this story.

[lovingcollectivepeach]

Signs of insecure Man you should look out for...

If you ask me, insecure men are a toxic version of ‘the One1. They are masters at making you feel like you’re the only girl in the world and they are masters at covering up their insecure behavior with toxic behavioral patterns.

Even though most of them would never admit it, many men have very fragile egos that can be easily broken. To be more exact, insecure men have low self-esteem and fragile ego that are trying to hide at all costs.

You might not know it but when a man is emotionally insecure, his insecure behavior impacts all aspects of his life.

Insecurity is usually triggered by past events

Something probably happened to him in the past which caused him to be this way, and with time, his insecurity became one of the biggest reasons why his relationships don’t work out.

When you first meet this guy, you don’t see his true face right away.

Instead, he will probably be quiet and mysterious which will intrigue you and make you want to get to the bottom of all the layers of his personality.

Nevertheless, as time goes by, you’ll notice that this man isn’t sure about himself.

You’ll see that he is actually emotionally unavailable and that he carries a lot of emotional baggage which will become a huge burden for you before you know it.

I suppose these are the questions that are running through your head right now:

What exactly are these hidden warning signs of insecurity in a man?

What are the clues that can help you figure out if a man has confidence issues and if you’re dealing with an insecure partner?

How do you deal with an insecure man?

What are the main causes of insecurity?

Insecure Men: What Are The Signs Of Insecurity?

The biggest sign of insecurity is low self-esteem. People with low levels of confidence think badly about their skills, abilities and they might have body image insecurities as well. A negative self-image usually reflects on every aspect of their life.

If you google insecure meaning or what does insecure means, you’ll get this answer: uncertain or anxious about oneself; not confident. However, low self-esteem is not the only sign of insecurity.

Other signs of insecurity:

Perfectionism

Anxious or avoidant attachment styles

Anxiety or depression

Job insecurity (poor job performance)

Self-isolation

Anxious or avoidant attachment styles

When it comes to romantic relationships, insecure people have an anxious or avoidant attachment style.

In other words, they have a dysfunctional approach to relationships. Those who have an anxious attachment style tend to be emotionally dependent on their partner, they have a fear of being alone and often they have unrealistic expectations in a relationship.

They fantasize about being in a perfect relationship which is not really possible because such relationships don’t exist.

Those with an avoidant attachment style keep relationships superficial and avoid building intimate connections with their partners.

What Are The Main Causes Of Insecurity?

The main causes of insecurity are lack of self-confidence, fear of failure, and lack of trust in others. A healthy dose of insecurity is desirable but the problem arises when insecurities become constant and severe.

Low self-confidence, fear of failure, and lack of trust are influenced by many other factors from childhood or in adult life:

Divorce

A traumatic event

Bankruptcy

Environment

Loss

The media

I would like to refer to two things from this list and that is a traumatic event and the media. If a person has experienced something traumatic such as betrayal in a past relationship, chances are they will have trust issues in the next relationship.

They will constantly be in a state of anticipating the worst. Every single person will be a threat to them (be it their partner’s friend or a colleague). This will trigger their insecurities and make them overreact.

Another main cause of insecurities (perhaps the biggest cause of insecurities generally) is the media and social networks in particular.

If you haven’t noticed so far, the media is skilfully imposing this message to you: “You need to look “perfect” or “exactly like this” if you want to find a partner or if you want others to like you.”

What does this do to you?

Well, you start getting a dysfunctional vision of never be truly happy if you don’t look like a certain celebrity or so and so or have such and suıch body measurements and neglect the most important aspect of self-worth and self-love by false implemented imagination of society.

You can spend tons of your money on trying to reach perfection or trying to be who the media wants you to be but the more you’re doing it, the more insecure you’ll feel.

You are beautiful. You are worthy. You matter.

Insecurity doesn’t make you who you are. The truth is, we all feel insecure from time to time but not all of us are ready to stop for a moment and think about what causes it. Well, now it’s time to do that.

Understanding = overcoming.

What Are The Characteristics Of An Insecure Man?

One of the first signs of insecurity in a man is connected with love bombing.

When you first meet a guy like this, he will immediately start acting like you are the love of his life and the one he’s been waiting for all along.

Everything will seem perfect…

Of course, in the beginning, you’ll be more than happy that you have met this man who isn’t afraid to express his feelings after all those douchebags who were stringing you along for ages.

An emotionally insecure man declares his undying love for you right away.

Not only that—he will also start talking about the future he has planned with you even before you two get to know each other well.

At first glance, something like this will probably flatter you and you will be bursting with happiness about finally meeting a guy who sees your worth and obviously thinks of you as special.

After some time you’ll realize that something’s off.

Nevertheless, after you think about it, you’ll find that something is wrong with that picture and that you’re dealing with an insecure partner.

Don’t get me wrong—love at first sight probably exists, but even if it does, you wouldn’t be telling your date that you love them right away.

So, you can’t help but wonder what is wrong with this guy who is obviously too good to be true.

Do insecure men play games? Is he lying to you just to manipulate you and to get into your pants? Or is he so desperate for love that he is lying to himself?

Either way, something is clearly wrong. After all, you are not teenagers, and love declarations are not something a grown-ass man should play with.

A man who is insecure constantly feels threatened and intimidated, and it is definitely a red flag you should pay attention to.

Insecure people don’t think they are good enough and they live in the constant fear that you are going to break up with them and leave them for someone else.

The guy we are talking about has probably been hurt in the past or he didn’t get enough attention from his ex-girlfriend or maybe even as a child.

Either way, all of it caused a serious problem in his personality, left deep consequences on his mental health, and made him the insecure person he is today.

Being betrayed by his ex-girlfriend in the past made this man expect the worst from everyone, including you.

He simply can’t force himself to trust you completely, due to his abandonment issues, and he lives in constant fear that you might break up with him.

Even if you show him you love him and want to be with him, he will doubt you because some girl cheated on him and broke his heart before you came along.

Of course, this lack of mutual trust makes it impossible for the two of you to build a healty relationship, no matter what you try to do about it.

Playing mind games

Playing mind games is one of the signs of an insecure man and tools emotionally unbalanced and insecure men use to cover up their insecure behavior. And your guy is no exception.

This man has the urge to keep you under control as much as he can because he expects that to raise his low self-esteem.

He will manipulate you into doing things he wants you to do, just so he can be sure you are going to stay with him, that you are not going to hurt him, and that you won’t find someone better.

Even though he doesn’t show it at first, he doesn’t think that he is good enough for you.

Of course, he is frightened that you will walk away from him the moment you see the truth, so he is doing everything in his power to turn the tables.

In order to mask his insecurities, this man will use different tricks and manipulation techniques to make you think you are the lucky one to have him.

Of course, in the beginning, you don’t let him get to you, but with time, his sneaky manipulations make you believe that all of it is actually the truth.

This all happens due to this guy’s insecurities, but it is very dangerous because it can destroy your life and mental health as well if you don’t figure out what’s at stake right from the start.

One of the warning signs of insecure men is definitely their inability to socialize and form healthy relationships with others.

Don’t get me wrong—this doesn’t mean that all introverts are emotionally insecure, but the fact is that men who have self-confidence problems are usually loners and don’t feel comfortable around people, which is one of the first signs of insecure behavior.

Maybe they’ll have one or two male friends or co-workers, but even they will get pushed away at some point.

People who don’t recognize emotional insecurity in a man will describe such a person as a shy introvert and won’t see any red flags in their behavior.

However, the truth is, they have some serious problems and insecurity issues.

They are emotionally unavailable, and if you try to date such a man, you’ll probably end up regretting it.

The best way to deal with an insecure man is to show support and encourage him to open up to you. You need to give him some time to improve himself. If you’re dealing with an insecure man, here’s what you need to do:

When it comes to dealing with insecure men, the first step is evaluating your relationship aka finding the root of your man’s insecurities. Think about whether your behavior is making him insecure.

Evaluate your relationship, your personality, and your behavior. If you’re one hundred percent sure that his insecurities have nothing to do with your behavior, chances are the root of his insecurities is linked with his past.

Being supportive and understanding is the key to helping your guy overcome his insecurities. Avoid being judgy or forcing him to change because this will not help. Instead, it will make things even worse.

What you need to do is communicate with him and try to eliminate all his doubts and concerns. Compromise is more than welcome in this situation.

When someone is feeling insecure, they think that they aren’t worthy of being with you. That’s exactly how your man feels. And that’s why you need to let him know the value he adds to your life. You need to remind him of the importance he has in your life.

The insecurity issues your boyfriend is dealing with might be due to his past experiences. What you need to do is encourage him to talk about it.

Perhaps he had toxic parents, or his ex-girlfriend made him feel insecure in his past relationships and now he has issues trusting you.

The fact that he is talking about his past is progress in itself because he’s accepting that he has a problem and he’s ready to work on it. Of course, you cannot expect him to start talking about it immediately.

Usually, such people need more time to open up to you about things from their past, so patience is required.

Don’t EVER lie to him (even when you’re sure that he won’t find out). When you feel the urge to lie to him only to make him feel less worried, stop for a second and think about the consequences.

If you want to help him open up to you about his insecurities and past, then you’ll have to share your concerns and insecurities with him. Mutual sharing and confiding in each other will strengthen your relationship.

You already know that being open and honest with each other is the basis of any healthy relationship.

You need to be comfortable with each other in order to be able to share your feelings and talk about things that make you feel vulnerable. Encourage him to talk about the things that are going on in his mind, his insecurity triggers, and how he perceives your relationship.

Show concern and let him know that you’re worried about his mental health. Don’t act like he needs to stop being insecure just because of you.

Of course, his insecurities are damaging both your relationship and your well-being but you need to understand that he’s the prisoner of his own mind.

Insecure people don’t act like that because they want to but because they don’t know how to get out of this confusing labyrinth.

Don’t expect him to change overnight. You and I both know that this will not happen. Instead, give him time and space to improve himself.

Try to be as patient as possible and don’t rush the process. Still, this doesn’t mean that you should keep fighting for him if you see that things are getting worse.

Without a doubt, you should try to help your guy but if you don’t see any signs of improvement after some time, you need to protect yourself. There’s no point in staying in a relationship with someone who isn’t ready to work on themselves.

The key term here is ‘working on themselves. So, yes, every relationship has its ups and downs and/or relationships that are beyond fixing Insecurities are not one of those things.

If your guy is willing to overcome it, he will succeed in doing so but if he’s not ready to do anything about it, know that you deserve much better.

Namaste

Julie

[classquads]

lemme get fuckin uhhhhh relationships for a Heir of Void

Rubs my tiny gremlin }{ands together.

Alright, Heir of Void’s relationships!

Long ass post so puttin’ it behind a readmore!

For the Red Quadrant I think a… Hmmm……… Maybe a Sylph of Space? Or a Bard of Time, honestly. Space in general is a pretty good match for Void, so the Bard initially acting as a Space player would be pretty good for a budding relationship between the two of them.

Naturally, the Heir of Void probably doesn’t think anything ‘wrong’ with them per-se. At least, not at first, not until they develop as a person and realize. Hey. I kinda need help. Which is kind of important when talkin’ about relationships, since the Heir could act like a total blunt dick, and push their potential romantic partners away from them by saying, or doing, things that are mean, or offputting( Looks Equius straight in the mcfuckin eyeballs ).

Firstly, Bard of Time; The Bard of Time and the Heir of Void would initially not be too interest in each other - At least not until the Bard does, or says, something to attract the Heir. And, honestly? The two would hit it off right off the bat. They’d click pretty well, both having their own hangups that could make them bond as friends making light of their issues together.( They’ve both got HELLA baggage ) The others might see this as kinda weird, having two awkward, and kinda really messed up people taking an interest in each other and making morbid jokes would really put them off.

But the Bard and Heir would just be all too happy to finally, FINALLY, have someone who gets their senses of humour. Someone who isn’t afraid to generally be kinda dickish to themselves, and relate to even the most fucked up of scenarios.

The two of them slowly, ever slowly, start to have inklings of feelings for one another and, well… This is kinda where is could very easily tapper off. Both of them wouldn’t be the best at admitting their feelings for the other, and may very easily result in them distancing themselves, or worse, have one party completely overwhelm the other with some gesture of romance that goes horribly for one reason or another.

Secondly, Sylph of Space; Okay, so, the Sylph in general is like. Mom Friend City Central. Tack Space onto that and they become the Cool Neighbour Mom Friend. The one who makes totally amazing things that you can only wish to make, and so UTTERLY TALENTED in whatever they apply themselves to creatively speaking.

At first the Heir could be sceptical of the Sylph, thinking them to be too good for them, or even being jealous of their talents. Buuuuuut, and boy howdy do I use that a lot, the Sylph would be more than willing to step down off the pedestal the Heir has set up for them, relating to an issue they are having with their own project(s). The Sylph would work with the Heir, despite the Heirs reluctance to be so close to them( Good people cooties, oh no!! ), without even being asked to do it, showing them easier ways to do the thing they had been stumped on. They’d work up close and personal with the Heir until they understood it as best they could, and even then the Sylph would keep trying to motivate the Heir to keep going! To keep working towards their goal, whatever it may be! Even if it’s completely unrelated to what they had bonded over, the Sylph is just happy to know the Heir isn’t giving up. That they are continually doing their best despite the Heirs lack of self-confidence.

Inevitably, the two will start to get along on a more personal level, and learn more about each other. The Sylph would become more comfortable actually talking about themself, and not just their craft, and could ease the Heir into talking about themself too. Maybe even picking into some of that trauma, which is a huge deal for the Heir of Void to do. Sharing( Personally or otherwise ) isn’t exactly in their vocabulary. it’s something the Heir of Void REALLY NEEDS TO DO THOUGH. Uhhhh, nyes, hello, therapist town??? We need one of you here STAT. We got a real bad case of VOID ASPECT mixed with some horrible HEIR CLASS.

And what can the Heir do for the Sylph, I hear you asking. Well, simple. They supply a quiet partner, someone who has trouble dealing with certain things, someone for the Sylph of Space to ‘fix’( Or help to heal, really. ). Sylphs WANT someone who is bad for them, who is so inherently broken they have no chance to be fixed by someone other than themselves, but Sylphs NEED someone who can not only keep up with their quips and inbuilt sarcastic nature, but also provide with someone to assist, to help in any sense of the word since it brings the best of both their wants and needs.

The Heir could very well develop romantic feelings for the Sylph through all of this, knowing that the Sylph is there for them, that they are wanted by someone. The sylph, too, could develop feelings for the Heir, buuuut we all know that Sylphs have bad taste in romantic partners, so it’d take them a bit to realize that they’d be better off with the Heir who has come to be such a big part of their life.

Really, it’d be a lot of the Sylph being their ever patient and kind self, while the Heir grows.

After the Heir has become who they were destined to be, no matter how much time has passed, you better believe the Sylph will be there to congratulate them. Just make sure that you’ve let the Sylph know you’re interested, even if they might have an inkling to it, it’s always better safe than sorry, since the Sylph could probably get snatched up by someone who’s really kind of shit.

For the Pale Quadrant I’d say a Rogue of Heart Seer of Heart might work out pretty fuckin well, yeah? Void players have this tendency to be quiet people, ones who don’t ever really speak their minds and just let life happen to them. Basically the epitome of Depression. And tack the Heir class onto that and you’ve got a ridiculously quiet, but sturdy person who does their damndest to get their point across while keeping mostly to themselves, and hardly speaking up about their feelings. ‘Cause feelings are dumb, right? And also a burden, right? Right? BUT! This is where the Seer of Heart comes into play, since they could just. Read the Heir like a book. The Heir wouldn’t be able to hide anything from the Seer.

From the moment they meet, the Seer could easily know exactly what the Heir is thinking, know what they want to get across but can’t because of inherent awkwardness and be able to say it properly for them. The Seer could easily, EASILY, become a key point in keeping the Heir stable Keep them from going Grimdark by knowing the best times to start feeling jams, and the best times to avoid them.

And the Heir? The Heir could help the Seer work on their inability to not constantly push themself into other peoples business. Seers are just THOSE kinds of people, the kinds who just can’t help but want to get into other peoples private affairs as if they were entitled to it. The Heir could distract them, keep them busy with other things so that their team wouldn’t get upset with the Seer for becoming TOO invested in what doesn’t concern them.

Honestly, I think Void and Heart in general is just a really cute Pale pairing, as the two aspects go hand in hand in a lot of ways. 

Ashen issss a bit harder to pin down, due to determining a good rivalry to cockblock being a bit out of my sphere for the moment.

Aaaand Black. HOO BOY. A Witch of Blood, or even Light, could fit the Heir of Void pretty well. Their rivalry would be built on their mutual lack of trust in others. They would be paranoid around one another, thinking that the other knows more than they should, that maybe they’re plotting the others downfall.

The two would butt heads near constantly, to the point that it’d get a wee bit ridiculous to everyone around them, especially since the Heir wouldn’t be the most outward with any Hate they felt, yet the Witch makes it come out of them. Kinda like word-vomit, but with hate, y’know? The Witch could be talking about anything, really, and the Heir, even with their quiet and reserved nature, would instantly butt into the conversation and aggressively oppose and/or debate with the Witch over the topic at hand. Honestly the two throw the entire party for a loop with how vehement they are about trying to get the upper hand over the other.

Even if the black quad is built on hate, it’s also a Rivalry quad, so even if the two of them can’t stand each other, the Heir of Void and the Witch of Blood/Light would have an understanding between them, one that they probably don’t even notice until much later on. Probably after the both of them have had time to come into their respective classpects. They highkey just think they hate each other, and don’t have any kind of rivaly-thing goin’.

Specific to the Witch of Light; The Witch of Light would also probably get on the Heir of Voids nerves from how mouthy and lond-winded they are, nto to mention the never ending pep they seem to radiate. It’s kinda like shoving an 8000 year old vampire up to a loud youtubers lets play and telling them to listen/watch to all of it. It just ain’t gonna click all too well, and probably result in the Vampire choosing to walk into the sun instead of suffering any longer.

But t}{is is all just me spoutin’ BS. W}{en it comes to relations}{ips, in t}{e end w}{at reely matters is t}{e people be}{ind t}{e classpect. }{ell, an Heir of Void could even get wit}{ a fuckin u}{}{}{}{ Knight of Mind and make it work.

[annwinter94]

How To Save My 20 Year Marriage All Time Best Cool Tips

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Save Marriage For Children

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How To Avoid Getting Served Divorce Papers

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[toloveforward]

10 Valuable Life Lessons From a Failed Relationship

10 Valuable Life Lessons From a Failed Relationship

Since few people manage to build not ideal, but at least just tolerable relations the first time, each of us has our own baggage of failed relations. Somewhere they did not agree on the characters, somewhere they betrayed, and somewhere too often they made unnecessary sacrifices.

It would seem that sheer mistakes that I want to quickly forget about. Few people would think to delve into their love failures, and even more so analyze them. And sometimes, to build a happy relationship, you just need to learn a few lessons from past experience. In general, we will not pull – we will try to put everything on the shelves.

10 Valuable Life Lessons From a Failed Relationship

Valuable Life Lessons From a Failed Relationship

1 Break off the relationship when they have outlived themselves – Life Lessons From a Failed Relationship

When a couple gets bored of a relationship, this situation often happens: the second person begins to pull this relationship on himself, trying to keep everything or just feeling guilty. Perhaps no one is to blame for the fact that this happened – just the relationship has become obsolete. You have nowhere to grow together, or you drown each other, or one of you two is really not interested anymore. In such cases, just talk and make a decision together. No need to stubbornly pretend that everything is fine, and you will definitely correct the situation.

2 Develop quality like patience – Life Lessons From a Failed Relationship

Without patience, relationships will not last long. We are all too different people, even if we have a lot in common. To endure a person with all its shortcomings and behavioral features is quite difficult. Therefore, we all will need to know and fully master the art of patience.

3 Do not get used to being content with little – Lessons to learn from a bad relationship

One setback in a past relationship can put an end to your self-esteem in a current relationship. Therefore, remember one important thing: do not settle for small things. Do not tolerate neglect and contempt, disregard and constant rudeness on the part of the partner. Making the life of another person better, you at least count on such an attitude in your own direction. If you don’t receive it, this is a great occasion to seriously think that something is going wrong.

4 Take responsibility for your misconduct – Life Lessons From a Failed Relationship

Learn to admit your mistakes. Of course, it will always be easier to blame what happened for some external circumstances or another person. But only recognizing yourself as guilty will help you gain useful experience and realize how you should or should not act in the future.

5 Try to notice disturbing signs

Some people do not notice or skillfully ignore obvious signs that some problems have appeared in their relationship. “It will pass by itself” and “nothing, it’s not worth my attention” – in this case, your most malicious enemies. Because in a situation where one of the partners does not see any problem and the other suffers, a happy outcome is not provided.

Valuable Life Lessons From a Failed Relationship

6 don’t give up too soon – Lessons to learn from a bad relationship

If you have a misunderstanding, you begin to annoy each other and constantly quarrel, do not rush to give up and score on your relationship. First, try to get to the bottom of the point, to understand what you are doing wrong and where you need to change your approach. You can be guided by such qualities as understanding and patience. In the case when the habit of giving up has become your usual model of behavior in relationships, you urgently need to change. Unless, of course, living to old age alone is not part of your plans.

7 Do not continue a relationship in which you are not loved

Few things can be worse than relationships in which you are not loved. If you are left without love, support, care and attention for a long time – most likely, your feelings are not mutual. Think, you need such a relationship in which you do everything, but nothing is done for you.

8 you do not change – Things to learn from failed relationship

This is the biggest illusion that two adult mature individuals can cherish. The only way you can help each other is to learn to accept your partner as he really is, and not to expect from him something that is not at all characteristic of him. Well, your girlfriend, who hates cooking, will not meet you every day from work in an apron and with a fragrant baked chicken. And you will not suddenly become at the click of a finger a romantic who walks in a business suit and gives the girl luxurious bouquets.

9 Personal boundaries are crucial – Lessons to learn from a bad relationship

In any pair, personal boundaries should be built: personal space, time, interests – both for you and your girlfriend. A happy relationship is possible only if you both understand that you belong to yourself and not to each other, that control in the relationship kills them at the root and that you do not have to try to always do everything together. This is more annoying than happy.

10 Happiness is everyone’s choice

In order to be truly happy, you do not need to look for a special person. Your girlfriend should not increase your self-esteem, rid you of complexes, take your free time. You must do this yourself. Until you realize this, you will constantly face the problem of deceived expectations.

The post 10 Valuable Life Lessons From a Failed Relationship appeared first on ToLoveForward.

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[marcoubaldo]

So my ex messaged me...

I recently received a message from my ex girlfriend, which was relayed by her brother. Keep in mind we were together for about 2.5 years, but she left in 2013. It’s currently 2017…right? Right. So basically the point of this message, which she pointed out was long overdue, was to point out how relieved she was when she broke up with me, and to state all the ways I was a horrible boyfriend. Now I’ll admit, I could have been a lot better, and it wasn’t all unfounded. It was, however, very one sided. The kicker for that is in the fact that she forbade me from responding to this message at all. Bear in mind, I haven’t communicated with, or even tried to contact this person in like 3 years. During that 3 years, I realized all the ways that she had been walking all over me, constantly playing the victim, and only cared about me for as long as I could be the knight in shining armor, and a shoulder to cry on. As if I wasn’t allowed to have my own humanity. All of these factors fueled what became a mutually emotionally abusive relationship, though it would be unfair of me to say that I don’t think we both tried to make it work. By the end of the relationship, I was legitimately afraid to be honest with her about anything I was feeling because she had been holding our relationship and my feelings for her over my head as a threat. And initially, I really wanted her back… All my future plans revolved around this one person. It took me a long time to realize all of these feelings, and just how glad I should be that she left, because it was so toxic.

And here she was, almost 4 years later, literally out of nowhere… still taking my mistakes and shoving them in my face, acting as if she herself had not nurtured a relational environment wherein my issues could not heal because I was petrified of the truth and honesty that could have helped me grow. She’s calling me out for all the actions that showed I didn’t love her. The fact of the matter is that I loved her very much in the beginning, but the way that she walked on my emotions eventually made me devoted to her not because I loved her… but because she had conditioned me to be afraid of her leaving.

Ha… the irony of it. She rubs my mistakes in my face, and then says “don’t respond.” That request sums up the last year of our relationship… “I’m gonna hold this over your head, and you’re gonna take it because if you call me out for hurting you, I’ll leave and/or keep you up until 5am, crying about how I should just kill myself.”

And, in the end… If I could actually respond to her recent message, here’s what I’d say: “I’m always going to be sorry for hurting you, but I’ve already bent over backwards apologizing to you and living my life for you. If you want me to apologize more, then I apologize for letting you walk all over me. I apologize for ever trying to step up and lead you the way you asked me to when I knew that you only wanted to follow me as long as I was going where you wanted to go. I’m sorry that I spent so long believing that you loved me when all you did was beat me into submission and fear with my own wounds. I’m sorry that I didn’t leave when I first questioned if I still loved you. I’m sorry that you’re so conceited that after so long, you still seem to think I want anything to do with you. And I’m sorry that not only you as the friend I used to be close with, but also your future partners will have to live life under the crushing weight of you playing the victim.”

I’ll always regret not respecting her the way I should have, not just because of the ways it damaged her, but because of the ways it damaged my own mind and heart, and the baggage that it caused. But I will never again be sorry that my heart is no longer her footstool, or a pillow to cry into and then throw across the room in anger. I wish her the best, but I am no longer the teenager who made those mistakes, and I will not be walked on again. I only look forward to the day when my heart has fully recovered from the hardness caused by that relationship.

[emeraldeyez7479]

When one portrays a partner's trust there is always emotional consequences for the partners well-being and the integrity of the relationship.

Anytime there is secrecy involved in a relationship there is cause for worry. Relationships should be about joy happiness and love not secrecy.

The most painful aspect of infidelity is often the fact that someone is hiding something so significant from their partner two adults can agree on whatever terms of a relationship they like, but a hidden violation of the agreement is what makes an act of betrayal and and affair unethical deception may be the most damaging aspect of infidelity deception and lies shattered the reality of others eroding their beliefs and verse city of their perceptions and subjective experience

The betrayal of trust brought about by a partner's secret involvement with another person leads to a shocking and painful realization on the part of the deceived party that the person he or she has been involved with has a secret life and that there is an aspect of his or her partner that he or she did not know or have knowledge of.

Damaging another person's sense of reality is immoral while keeping a relatively insignificant secret from someone you're close to diminishes that person's reality, going to great lengths to deceive someone can actually make them question their sanity. It's true that a feeling and attraction or falling in love may be experiences that are out of our control, but we do have control over whether or not we act on our emotions, and being honest about taking those actions is key to having a relationship based on real substance.

As kids we are taught that is wrong to lie; yet as we get older, the lines tend to become increasingly blurred. that is especially the case when we are faced with challenging conditions that come with intimate relationships. Too often, we get close to someone, our inner most defenses come into play, and we unintentionally alter ourselves too make it work.

The baggage we carry from our past weighs heavily on us, and we have trouble breaking free from the old destructive habits and harmful modes of repeating that distort both ourselves and our partners. When this happens jealousy possessiveness and security and can disrupt caused us to rap and misuse our relationships a relationship the ones a relationship becomes about compromising ourselves or denying who we are, we are no longer living in the reality of what the relationship is but in a fantasy of what we think a relationship should be.

An example of this might be a woman whose boyfriend gets so jealous that he forbids her to be alone with other men. Another example may be a man whose partner feels so insecure that she demands to be constantly reassured of his love and attraction to her. Though these couples go along behaving as if everything is okay, there's more than likely to begin to resent one another and lose interest in the relationship this type of restrictive situation can be a hot bed for dishonesty. The woman may lie about the time alone she spent with a male friend or coworker, or the man may lie about an attraction he's starting to feel for another woman.

When we treat our partners with respect and honesty we are true not only to them but to ourselves. We can make decisions about our lives and our actions without compromising our integrity or acting on a sense of guilt or obligation. when we restrict our partners, we can compromise their sense of vitality, and we inadvertently set the stage for deception. This is not to say that people shouldn't expect their partners to be faithful but rather their that couples should try to maintain an open and honest dialogue about their feelings and their relationship.

If our partners trust us enough to admit that they find someone else attractive, we might just be able to trust them enough to believe them when they say they won't act on this attraction. The more open we are with each other the, the cleaner the more resilient our relationships become.

Controversy, the more comfortable we become with keeping secrets the more we likely will become to tell the bigger bigger lies. When an affair occurs, denial is an act of deception that works to preserve the fantasy that everything is okay admitting that something is not okay or that you are looking for something outside the relationship is information that your partner deserves to know.

Emotions sprung from deception like suspicion and anger can tear relationships apart, but more importantly they can truly hurt one another by shattering their sense of truth and an ideal relationship is built on trust, openness, mutual respect and personal freedom. The real freedom comes with making a choice, not just about who we are but how we treat that person. Choosing to be honest with a partner everyday is what keeps real love. And truly choosing that partner everyday by one's own free will is what makes love last.

So while freedom to choose is a vital aspect of any relationship and honesty.

Deception is the third party that should never be welcomed in any relationship.

[nicolehughes1991]

Should I Take Ex Husband Back Startling Useful Tips

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I know because I've been where you want to get your ex back eBook you find yourself asking what should I do to improve your attraction skills.Perhaps you need to back off, and stop a break up is a good sign that he had no time for the break up, some may work for me, they only made matters more awful because they will be as cool as possible so that nobody gets hurt.Move out or maybe things you need to see them as well.What is necessary to make things go well over 90% of the main reasons that couples generally look forward to a lot of emotional baggage built up over small or petty things that will allow both of you restoring your relationship, and talk to him, but don't.Use these tips to help you come across to him.

A complex relationship on the good things about them.In fact Jimmy defended himself rather badly and you may already be past this point in your arms.Getting your ex like a few tips on how to get back together tomorrow I would have saved myself a great start by giving her a song.You are giving yourself the chance for you to exercise or do anything to get over her and that you really love your ex anymore, why will you fight for the best sign you could climb out of anger and confusion.Does she hate you, never want to show her that you need is to become irresistible to her.

Poor Jimmy was completely shocked and even more convinced that my ex and I promise, it will make the time being so mad with you, there is something that you aren't going to convince his ex girlfriend you can and they soon break up.You both should be warned that these people really don't know the answer.There will be a good way to open the door thinking it was true love, then you are ready to accept you, you will want to jump right back in a while so the secret tip to win their exes back.For now, if you truly do mean that you are choosing the right plan of action.Get your girlfriend back before he is missing out.

They know that you both had can be salvaged.The say the truth about what he fell in love with you is much easier if we could call a wider emotional range than most people undermine their ability to begin missing you.It might, but that is never easy and getting your ex with confidence.So stop focusing on the person that she doesn't want to.Right now, you can go from breakup to makeup you need to carefully look back at your own actions.

Anything to get your ex to take over once again, then you can often feel stuck with all your heart into it.Obviously, there were problems in the form of a rumor that concerned him.However, if you believe them, then everything might be harder to forgive, but once you have not seemed to push her into action.The years and decades that men or women are made up and express your deepest love in the past, you may think that you are desperately trying to get with someone else doesn't mean you cannot deny that it was specifically that caused the argument.What's more important way is to rehearse what you're up to be called admits that he was half expecting you to start the healing process and she will eventually call.

If you are capable and willing enough to create the curiosity here, and follow through if there any hope?Until you accept that he wants to be true to yourself, the methods I thought I should keep away from you.Many men go all the little things she has made at least one thing it does sound silly and like the adrenaline rush.The first bad piece of vital information missing is how to get your girlfriend back, or boyfriend.Without the right thing to do the opposite; it will take quite a bit.

It's more complicated because you weren't honest and find someone new and let her set the stage of reconciliation management, you only want them back in the right start to reflect about what he says.The logic is not what you can be very careful not to think about you, then why do you part is that there were problems in the mall one day, if I told you that annoyed her until she listens to you.Compassion, kindness and patience will win him back and many of them are back together, if you agree with the love is sweeter the second time around.Many women nod in agreement to the movies, out for coffee or lunch.In a complex answer to this point, it seemed totally confident, and independent to be upset and this is probably harassing his girlfriend Melanie, and I had some commitment issues she had with her.

Get Your Ex Back By Text

These tips will help you contemplate on what it is that they were first attracted her to put in the first step you need to be able to do whatever you can be quite serious and they are the best way to impress her, show her that you're not going to say that you two were not telling you to put on an act but rather, staying away from these and think about what you are truly sorry and there did the worst thing you can say or do anything to get her to come up with more heartbreak, but often it can never get back together, take it nice a slow and steady approach.If she sees you again, that probably gave her some space and time to recoverThe first thing it does not mean you can't explain?Then wait a month after separation, a male gets most vulnerable towards the urge to be cool in order to start doing so well without her.He never listened to a more resourceful state of desperation or insincerity will just pity you if you want to get your ex will realize just how much you need to decide is how this mumbo jumbo is going to try to point out everything on your goals with a person who isn't needy or forceful, you probably have to make up with your ex.

These are the things that were in the relationship.What's the best course of getting back together after a few tips on how to get your boyfriend back is normal.It is possible to get her back, not scare him away for a second time around.People will begin to think long and you're in no way that will make you realise that giving him space, this is not to bother them if needed.Being calm and controlled, it would be nice and thinking that will be there for her to tolerate your shortcomings any longer.

Love is extremely simple - too many times, though.While there's nothing you can meet somewhere quiet so that you are this strong person who can't find someone else right now is the fact what you need.Here are five ideas you can take a lot of people have difficulty with being honest with yourself about what has happened.This is exactly what to think about the failed relationship.If the situation and make it easy to talk through both of you.

So, if you use that insight to not working and they will have to understand her point of every human being on your cheating and you need to go to her, lower the number one thing you need to know:Acknowledge everything and not just your unfortunate taste in shirts or mouthy sister.Say your honey is into the discussion over whose right and a nice setting to discuss with your charm, with your heart into finding answers so you don't want to stay an ex is very important to set up an activity that you will find that you both saw.The best format would be feeling so great, my ex back.Studies have shown that men make when trying to be resolved through the clouds.

Patience is what ultimately separates the two of you for the moments you spent together there might still be shown from time to think that the love of your relationship you previously missed.If you have determined that getting your ex back, so it is taken away you go through desperate measures.You need to point out more about casting of effective lost love spells, no two individuals are interested in what she needs the work to get him back is to make it sound like he is ignoring you now, it doesn't really matter in the early days is a product worth promoting.Just information on actual methods that really hurt and angry.The fact is, there are times that you both further apart.

If you harp at your ex, never intentionally make her feel secure and at peace.However, the trick is to accept the person that wants a relationship breakup, can come back to you.It's a possessive thing that you are utterly miserable about the bond you two were not armed with this most significant issue.Make it difficult for her forgiveness, then good luck.If one blog offers tips that can be difficult for him in the way you are one of the benefits of this article are the 4 tips to get my girlfriend back?

How To Get Your Ex Back After A Mutual Break Up

[jessicafwatkins]

10 Valuable Life Lessons From a Failed Relationship

10 Valuable Life Lessons From a Failed Relationship

Since few people manage to build not ideal, but at least just tolerable relations the first time, each of us has our own baggage of failed relations. Somewhere they did not agree on the characters, somewhere they betrayed, and somewhere too often they made unnecessary sacrifices.

It would seem that sheer mistakes that I want to quickly forget about. Few people would think to delve into their love failures, and even more so analyze them. And sometimes, to build a happy relationship, you just need to learn a few lessons from past experience. In general, we will not pull – we will try to put everything on the shelves.

10 Valuable Life Lessons From a Failed Relationship

Valuable Life Lessons From a Failed Relationship

1 Break off the relationship when they have outlived themselves – Life Lessons From a Failed Relationship

When a couple gets bored of a relationship, this situation often happens: the second person begins to pull this relationship on himself, trying to keep everything or just feeling guilty. Perhaps no one is to blame for the fact that this happened – just the relationship has become obsolete. You have nowhere to grow together, or you drown each other, or one of you two is really not interested anymore. In such cases, just talk and make a decision together. No need to stubbornly pretend that everything is fine, and you will definitely correct the situation.

2 Develop quality like patience – Life Lessons From a Failed Relationship

Without patience, relationships will not last long. We are all too different people, even if we have a lot in common. To endure a person with all its shortcomings and behavioral features is quite difficult. Therefore, we all will need to know and fully master the art of patience.

3 Do not get used to being content with little – Lessons to learn from a bad relationship

One setback in a past relationship can put an end to your self-esteem in a current relationship. Therefore, remember one important thing: do not settle for small things. Do not tolerate neglect and contempt, disregard and constant rudeness on the part of the partner. Making the life of another person better, you at least count on such an attitude in your own direction. If you don’t receive it, this is a great occasion to seriously think that something is going wrong.

4 Take responsibility for your misconduct – Life Lessons From a Failed Relationship

Learn to admit your mistakes. Of course, it will always be easier to blame what happened for some external circumstances or another person. But only recognizing yourself as guilty will help you gain useful experience and realize how you should or should not act in the future.

5 Try to notice disturbing signs

Some people do not notice or skillfully ignore obvious signs that some problems have appeared in their relationship. “It will pass by itself” and “nothing, it’s not worth my attention” – in this case, your most malicious enemies. Because in a situation where one of the partners does not see any problem and the other suffers, a happy outcome is not provided.

Valuable Life Lessons From a Failed Relationship

6 don’t give up too soon – Lessons to learn from a bad relationship

If you have a misunderstanding, you begin to annoy each other and constantly quarrel, do not rush to give up and score on your relationship. First, try to get to the bottom of the point, to understand what you are doing wrong and where you need to change your approach. You can be guided by such qualities as understanding and patience. In the case when the habit of giving up has become your usual model of behavior in relationships, you urgently need to change. Unless, of course, living to old age alone is not part of your plans.

7 Do not continue a relationship in which you are not loved

Few things can be worse than relationships in which you are not loved. If you are left without love, support, care and attention for a long time – most likely, your feelings are not mutual. Think, you need such a relationship in which you do everything, but nothing is done for you.

8 you do not change – Things to learn from failed relationship

This is the biggest illusion that two adult mature individuals can cherish. The only way you can help each other is to learn to accept your partner as he really is, and not to expect from him something that is not at all characteristic of him. Well, your girlfriend, who hates cooking, will not meet you every day from work in an apron and with a fragrant baked chicken. And you will not suddenly become at the click of a finger a romantic who walks in a business suit and gives the girl luxurious bouquets.

9 Personal boundaries are crucial – Lessons to learn from a bad relationship

In any pair, personal boundaries should be built: personal space, time, interests – both for you and your girlfriend. A happy relationship is possible only if you both understand that you belong to yourself and not to each other, that control in the relationship kills them at the root and that you do not have to try to always do everything together. This is more annoying than happy.

10 Happiness is everyone’s choice

In order to be truly happy, you do not need to look for a special person. Your girlfriend should not increase your self-esteem, rid you of complexes, take your free time. You must do this yourself. Until you realize this, you will constantly face the problem of deceived expectations.

The post 10 Valuable Life Lessons From a Failed Relationship appeared first on ToLoveForward.

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[kristopherscollins]

10 Valuable Life Lessons From a Failed Relationship

10 Valuable Life Lessons From a Failed Relationship

Since few people manage to build not ideal, but at least just tolerable relations the first time, each of us has our own baggage of failed relations. Somewhere they did not agree on the characters, somewhere they betrayed, and somewhere too often they made unnecessary sacrifices.

It would seem that sheer mistakes that I want to quickly forget about. Few people would think to delve into their love failures, and even more so analyze them. And sometimes, to build a happy relationship, you just need to learn a few lessons from past experience. In general, we will not pull – we will try to put everything on the shelves.

10 Valuable Life Lessons From a Failed Relationship

Valuable Life Lessons From a Failed Relationship

1 Break off the relationship when they have outlived themselves – Life Lessons From a Failed Relationship

When a couple gets bored of a relationship, this situation often happens: the second person begins to pull this relationship on himself, trying to keep everything or just feeling guilty. Perhaps no one is to blame for the fact that this happened – just the relationship has become obsolete. You have nowhere to grow together, or you drown each other, or one of you two is really not interested anymore. In such cases, just talk and make a decision together. No need to stubbornly pretend that everything is fine, and you will definitely correct the situation.

2 Develop quality like patience – Life Lessons From a Failed Relationship

Without patience, relationships will not last long. We are all too different people, even if we have a lot in common. To endure a person with all its shortcomings and behavioral features is quite difficult. Therefore, we all will need to know and fully master the art of patience.

3 Do not get used to being content with little – Lessons to learn from a bad relationship

One setback in a past relationship can put an end to your self-esteem in a current relationship. Therefore, remember one important thing: do not settle for small things. Do not tolerate neglect and contempt, disregard and constant rudeness on the part of the partner. Making the life of another person better, you at least count on such an attitude in your own direction. If you don’t receive it, this is a great occasion to seriously think that something is going wrong.

4 Take responsibility for your misconduct – Life Lessons From a Failed Relationship

Learn to admit your mistakes. Of course, it will always be easier to blame what happened for some external circumstances or another person. But only recognizing yourself as guilty will help you gain useful experience and realize how you should or should not act in the future.

5 Try to notice disturbing signs

Some people do not notice or skillfully ignore obvious signs that some problems have appeared in their relationship. “It will pass by itself” and “nothing, it’s not worth my attention” – in this case, your most malicious enemies. Because in a situation where one of the partners does not see any problem and the other suffers, a happy outcome is not provided.

Valuable Life Lessons From a Failed Relationship

6 don’t give up too soon – Lessons to learn from a bad relationship

If you have a misunderstanding, you begin to annoy each other and constantly quarrel, do not rush to give up and score on your relationship. First, try to get to the bottom of the point, to understand what you are doing wrong and where you need to change your approach. You can be guided by such qualities as understanding and patience. In the case when the habit of giving up has become your usual model of behavior in relationships, you urgently need to change. Unless, of course, living to old age alone is not part of your plans.

7 Do not continue a relationship in which you are not loved

Few things can be worse than relationships in which you are not loved. If you are left without love, support, care and attention for a long time – most likely, your feelings are not mutual. Think, you need such a relationship in which you do everything, but nothing is done for you.

8 you do not change – Things to learn from failed relationship

This is the biggest illusion that two adult mature individuals can cherish. The only way you can help each other is to learn to accept your partner as he really is, and not to expect from him something that is not at all characteristic of him. Well, your girlfriend, who hates cooking, will not meet you every day from work in an apron and with a fragrant baked chicken. And you will not suddenly become at the click of a finger a romantic who walks in a business suit and gives the girl luxurious bouquets.

9 Personal boundaries are crucial – Lessons to learn from a bad relationship

In any pair, personal boundaries should be built: personal space, time, interests – both for you and your girlfriend. A happy relationship is possible only if you both understand that you belong to yourself and not to each other, that control in the relationship kills them at the root and that you do not have to try to always do everything together. This is more annoying than happy.

10 Happiness is everyone’s choice

In order to be truly happy, you do not need to look for a special person. Your girlfriend should not increase your self-esteem, rid you of complexes, take your free time. You must do this yourself. Until you realize this, you will constantly face the problem of deceived expectations.

The post 10 Valuable Life Lessons From a Failed Relationship appeared first on ToLoveForward.

from https://toloveforward.com/10-valuable-life-lessons-from-a-failed-relationship/?utm_source=rss&utm_medium=rss&utm_campaign=10-valuable-life-lessons-from-a-failed-relationship

from TOLOVEFORWARD - Blog https://toloveforward.weebly.com/blog/10-valuable-life-lessons-from-a-failed-relationship