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melyaliz · 5 years ago

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Canary 9

Canary Masterlist

Fandom: Marvel / MCU

Summary: He meant to clear the air... and now I’m drowning.

Pairing: Loki x Reader

Notes: These two... they are driving me crazy. I honestly want to give up! Stubborn little bastards.

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After that little comment I avoided Loki and he let me. Sitting sullenly in the corner like some rejected child, his eyes never leaving mine as I forced myself to smile and laugh with my teammates. Forcing myself not to show how much he affected me.

Not that this is anything new.

Forcing myself to hide how I am really feeling. Forcing a shield, shutting off all the parts of me I didn’t like.

Maybe Loki was right…

Ok, I said it. Just this once. But I’m taking that admission to the grave.

I think I just need to sleep…

But I can’t, so here I lay, my legs hanging off the side of my bed while I let my thoughts swim in while circles around my head like the music playing out of my stereo. The corus crashing around me building and swelling like my emotions, angry and twisted.

Twisted.

Yep, that sounds about right.

My emotions are so fucking twisted. Knotted up in a tangled mess.

“I have come to clear the air.”

I sat up so fast I got a head rush. The music dropping, crashing down to an eerie silence.

“And it looks like you have already done that.” he chuckled, the sound light and airy. Not the tone of a remorseful man. Adding to my tangle of emotions.

“Loki?” Honestly, it was getting a little annoying how he acted as if he could just come and go wherever he wanted. Hello, this was my ROOM. and it was three in the morning. I could have been sleeping.

I wasn’t… but I could have been.

“Did you have fun today?” Loki asked taking a few steps closer to me as he closed the door. Shutting us in. His eyes roaming over my body as if studying for my reaction. It wasn’t hard to tell, I wasn’t having his bullshit. I was tired and my head was a mess of… confusion.

“Yes why?” it would have been if you hadn’t been such a massive prick Mr. God of putting your foot in your mouth.

“You seemed to be, all laughs and smiles.”

“Those are signs of someone enjoying themselves.”

“It’s just a shame you were only mortal dancing.”

“Oh, and how do the gods do it?” the words came out before I could stop them. Me, the master of sound. Couldn’t stop the words as they flowed from my mouth like a bullet moving so fast I could only watch. My hand was up just a moment after, too slow.

But Loki’s wasn’t.

Reaching out over the end of my bed to where I sat his hand came over mine. The touch so unexpected I wasn’t sure what to do. Why did he just do that?

“Don’t” his voice soft but his gaze was intense, piercing into my very soul. “I want you to speak your mind.”

“No, you don’t.”

“Come” his hand tugged at mine ignoring my last comment. “I said I wanted to clear the air.”

“The air feels very clear to me.”

“Is that why the music stopped when I came in?”

As if on command to my total embarrassment the music leaked out my stereo. Mid-song. Guess my mastery of sound isn’t as… mastrey as I thought. Here we go, Loki was going to gloat, going to give me that smile of “oh look I got you.”

But he didn’t. The only reaction I received was a small eyebrow raise.

Maybe he really was trying to clear the air.

“Are you going to get up?”

Oh yeah, his hand was still on mine, “Ok” Gently I crawled off the bed moving so I was in front of him. “So what did you have in mind?”

“A moment.”

He turned and played with the stereo until a soft some started to play. Something I was unfamiliar with. The tune gentle and airy, like cold rain on a hot day. Refreshing and soothing.

“Now,” he said, his voice just as soft reminding me of being curled up in clean sheets on said rainy day. “I’m going to show you what a real dance looks like.”

Hands putting me in place, I couldn’t help but realize how long his fingers seemed as they enveloped mine. His touch was so soft his movements smooth as he slowly led me around the room, green eyes never leaving my own in a gaze that made me feel slightly light-headed.

I’m blaming that last part on it being three in the morning.

“It’s all about the near touch, that feeling of almost having something.” his voice was low soft and thick. Like coffee. Dark and beautiful but sending waves of buzzing energy through me. For a moment all I wanted was to steal the sound and save it somewhere.

But now was not the time.

And he was not the person.

He pulled away for a moment while I mimicked his motions our hands just inches apart. Eyes still locked as if they held each other in a deeper embrace than any our bodies could. His body took a slow step forward and mine took one back.

“Just follow my lead.”

“Ok”

“Say it out loud.”

I hadn’t realized I had turned off my sound. Just like I hadn’t realized I had stopped breathing until that moment. Letting out a long much-needed breath for air I nodded repeating myself this time so he could hear.

“Why do you do that?” he asked, his voice still slow, no sense of anger or frustration. I bit my lip focusing on following his lead making sure our hands never touched, keeping them just a whisper apart.

“Do what?” it was innocent but I knew what he wanted to know. He had been fighting for this conversation for weeks now. Leading up to it. I already knew his question and my answer.

“Mute yourself around me.”

Because I don’t want to say the wrong thing.

“I’m sorry.”

“That’s not an answer.”

“I don’t know” I pulled my gaze away from him faltering for a moment. Hand moving away as my feet stumbled slightly. His finger gently moved to my face pulling me back to him.

“You don’t do that with Steve.”

Steve doesn’t make me nervous like you do. Even when I was crushing on him, he never made me feel the way I do around you.

No one has made me feel the way I do when I’m around you.

“Steve is my friend.”

“Oh Canary! I’m hurt.” he paused from the dancing hand on his heart in mock shock, “you consider the boy scout friends but detest my company enough that you mute yourself?”

“I don’t detest your company!” there it was, that weird pitch, that offbeat tune that I hated so much. Why couldn’t I have a cute voice, one with sweet tones that didn’t break under pressure? Why can’t I just mute myself? Change my tone. After all, I’m a master of sound there has to be a way to keep myself from doing that.

“So I make you nervous” Loki was getting a little too close to the truth at this point. His voice like an arrow to my heart. Deadly and true. The sound of that heart was picking, so loud in my ears, I was sure he could hear the thudding.

Slow down, girl. Catch your breath. But then again, maybe honestly was the best.

“Yes”

He blinked as the truth fell from my lips, that gaze of his studying me, looking for the trick, the lie. The sugar-coated truth.

But there was none. Just honest clean truth.

“Why?”

His voice barely a whisper now, delicate and soft. Flowing over me like a summer breeze, yellow and warm.

“Why do you care.” it wasn’t defensive, it could have been. I could have deflected again. Could have pushed him away. Shut off. But I’m done shutting him out. I need to know. Need to start untangling this web we have built.

“Why do I care that you make me nervous.”

“Why do you care about any of this, why do you want my laugh, why do you hate it that I mute myself, why Loki? Why are you here right now?”

“Because I have never met anyone like you before.”

“What?” his words took me by surprise I took a physical step back. Confused. Why would a god care about a mortal? Especially a mortal like me. A million thoughts flying through my head, swirling through me like a whirlwind.

Loki just stood there watching me, that smile on his face, that look of amusement. “You don’t see it do you.”

“See what?” What was he talking about?

“How beautiful you are.” his hands waved around us and that was when I realized the music that had been playing was flying around us. Tangling up in his words. Dancing with them. Spinning around and around. They had become their own thing as if forming the feelings spilling in my head coming to life in notes and tones.

“You are like a work of art, like a song that came to life.” he stood over me his very presence so tall and strong I felt like he had enveloped me in his very being. “And yet you hide it like it’s a poison.” A slender finger brushed against my face pushing away a strand of my hair from my face. “I keep trying to make you open up because you are too beautiful to hide away.”

He was so close to me I could feel his breath across my face. His lips so close to mine couldn’t see anything but them. It was as if the whole world stood still handing in mid-motion waiting.

My eyes fluttered slightly.

And then he pulled away coughing slightly pulling at his shirt.

The spell was broken and all I could do was stand there feeling empty and confused.

“Goodnight”

Turning he left. His movements so abrupt that they seemed to push me backward. Hard and real as if someone had dumped a bucket of ice water on me.

My breath came out as a gasp for air. The empty feeling filling me like water in my lungs. Drowning. I was drowning in total and utter confusion.

Falling backward bounced slightly as I hit my bed. Eyes studying the white of my ceiling. My head swimming, drowning. Getting pulled under into the deep abyss.

Pulling the sound around me I screamed in frustration.

I think I’m falling for that infuriating man.

Gasping for air I ran my fingers over my face ready to let out another wave of fury when my door opened again.

-GET TAGGED!-

Tagging: @royslittleharper @the-shadow-of-atlantis @coffee-randomness @daisyboobear @smolwithpurpletols @jason-redhood @hello-i-lovespiderman-blr @ocelysium @pinkwitch21 @tomhncharliep

Loki: @wayward-hell

Canary: @baybay123455 @rizanendoza808 @dragonrosegardens @6-daughter-of-a-witch-6 @califorina-grown @2s0uls @oh-no-a-whovian @it-jinxed-us @pixiehex1985

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