#most of the time we just dont have the ingredients to make things bc my mom is My Mom and kinda shit at feeding us

[wibble-wobbegong]

could a more perfect man exist

[metamorphiacreations]

i want to talk about Jjajang Cookie and cultural disconnection

bc its not the focus of the story but its important for her as a character

hi welcome back to Meta rambling at 3am again akandn

The dish of jjajangmyeon or black bean sauce noodles (which sounds so fucking good, i really wanna try some) was brought to Korea in the late 19th century by way of Chinese migrant workers and stems from the Chinese dish, zhajiangmian or fried bean sauce noodles

i saw a post from @/walnutcookie where he mentioned that unlike most other cookies, Agent Jjajang doesnt know how to make her own dish, Cream Puff Cookie knows how to make cream puffs, Latte Cookie knows how to make lattes, even Tanghulu Cookie's whole thing is going back and forth between hot and cold baths because thats what you do to the fruit to make tanghulu, but Jjajang has never made jjajangmyeon until she starts running the noodle shop and even then she doesnt get the hang of it until Olive (who ill call Oli for this post) shows her how to make noodles.

this could be interpreted as Jjajang representing children or descendants of immigrants that have one way or another, lost touch with their culture. the chances of it meaning to be that deep are honestly 50/50 because on one hand the story is a hardass of a government agent does average life work to track down aliens but at the same time the story so far has constantly brought up going back to your roots and homestyle nostalgia. in fact the reason the restaurant blows up in the first place is because Jjajang learned how to play to the aliens' favor by making the noodles taste like home to them.

the franchise doesnt need to say it out loud because its so obvious but a cookie's main ingredient is integral to their living and for a lot of cookies, that ingredient is like 98% of their diet. so the fact that Jjajang up until this point had been eating instant noodles rather than proper jjajangmyeon probably wasnt good for her.

we can see that slowly but surely she starts becoming more happy and comfortable making noodles and even catches herself taking pride in her work, although she tries to bring herself back to reality afterwards. she is a secret agent, not a noodle chef! but i wonder if she realizes that she's finally able to find some connection to her ancestors. given the dishes history, it would make Jjajang canonically Chinese Korean but she talks like she never had the chance to partake in her Chinese heritage.

i myself am afro-dominican. 2nd gen american born or however you say it. my great-grandmother, grandmother and great aunts moved from DR to New York and without getting too personal, i dont feel confident in my knowledge about Dominican culture. i dont know about the history of my country, i dont know about our clothing styles or anything specific but i do know about our food! we eat it all the time! i love sancocho, i love mangú, i love platanos in general. food just makes me feel connected to DR even though ive never been (yet!)

call it projecting or whatever but i feel like Jjajang is the same way, shes happy making noodles because it brought her closer to her family roots and even if that wasnt the intention with her character, i still think its a great aspect and wonderful, quiet plotline.

[rocksandboulders]

hey guys :) are you looking for more ways to manifest in your life and/or do you not have time to set aside for manifestations? even if you are not spiritual, these are great ways to build a healthier headspace for yourself.

my BIGGEST tip, which i use on a daily basis, is to turn your everyday tasks into a ritual. here are some examples to use or to find inspiration from:

1- CLEANING RITUALS (showering, bathing, brushing teeth, brushing hair, sweeping, dishes, etc.)

firstly, this is one of the easiest to come up with, and it makes large strides towards positivity, especially when it's something you dread doing. rather than thinking about how badly you want to be done with x task, take a breath and think about how you are doing x thing for y outcome. this can be something as simple as cleansing the space, both physically and energetically, but you can also get more complex with it if there's something with more steps irking you.

when i shower, for example, i use shampoo, conditioner, face wash, and body wash, and i use each item twice. this gets really tedious sometimes, but if i give a reason for why i am doing each thing, talking myself through the process, it slows my brain down, grounds me, and leaves me feeling much more fulfilled by the end. (ex: "i am washing my face to rid myself of any masks i put on that i dont wish to keep." "i am washing my hands to wash off any unsteadiness." "i am washing my chest to relieve my heart of stress.")

if you're interested in my very intricate shower routine, im absolutely happy to give a full outline of products, the intentions i use, the order in which i use them, etc.

2- FOOD AND BEVERAGE (herbs, teas, instant meals, restaurant meals, coffee, etc)

by preparing, ordering, or even grocery shopping, you create many, many different opportunities in which to manifest. in my personal life, i find it easiest to do when i prepare food or drinks for myself.

this can be something as simple as a singular ingredient, and as complicated as every ingredient and technique used! i think, most often, i use this when i make myself tea, because i can just think to myself a singular intention for the cup. "this tea is being made to comfort me." "this tea will slow down my racing thoughts." "this tea will make me sleep easier." etc.

i also like to ask my friends what they would like their intentions to be when i make them food or drinks. you can also set intentions if youre reheating something, re-seasoning something, or even just changing the plate or bowl it's served with.

3-ACTIVITIES (classes, friends, arts and crafts, music, sports, etc)

this is one that i think i overlook a lot, but im trying to make more space to manifest with in my life now. when in regards to activities, i personally spend a lot of time dreading the fact that i have to do anything (bc i would so love to just sit in my bed all day) (and im sure most of us would love that as well), but letting ourselves look at our opportunities negatively in the ways we do means that we push negative energy onto our experiences before they even happen. i, for one, have had my most fulfilling experiences when i have gone in with an intention of what it is for.

this does NOT mean the intention stays the same, or even stays at all. flexibility is key.

but i digress. if you friends are having a beach day and you spend the time leading up to it just dreading that it's going to happen, it's not going to go as well for you compared to if you spent your time being excited and happy. the flexibility comes in when your beach day is suddenly rained out. if youve been a party pooper, youre going to continue to complain, but if youve been optimistic and positive, youre going to work to find an alternative that is just as, if not even more fun.

this is also important in keeping you moving in classes. ("today i learn x." "i am going to x class because y." "my goal for today is to stay fully focused.")

CONCLUSION

this is so fun to me and if anyone wants to talk about it MESSAGE ME this is SO INTERESTING and i have SO MUCH MORE IWANT TO SAY

[noivysneverland]

a drunk, rambling (of both positive and negative sides) of pokemon scarlet (my pick) and violet. spoilers ahead under the cut. you’ve been justly warned

tl;dr up front, this game in terms of Story, Characters, Battle Mechanics, and new changes to the overworld far exceed the lack luster trash that I think gen 8 is. as i make my next sandvich to feed to the stupid lizard i named Heavy because of its addiction to said sandviches i think about what this game has brought to the table, and it’s got a lot of filling in it,but arguably its execution of has been for some funny, others an embarrassment, and others still, a blatant showcase of why first party pokemon games are going the Way of the Dodo in terms of quality. 

it has been Five days since generation 9 has had its rather divisive release into the public space, most certainly one of the most anticipated releases for the switch this year, and for a not insubstancial vocal contingency have been raking it over the coals for a lot of reasons, predominantly performance and graphics issues. its so hilariously bad on this front because the frame rate dips, shadow rendering and sometimes piss awful rendering speeds make the game look like something out of a goddamn steam greenlight submission (remember those????). now see i dont normally even care about that sort of thing or can just easily ignore it. except this happens so frequently i cant even go a few minutes without something getting choppy. and yea when it comes to a first party nintendo release fuck up should be a badge of shame we should put not on gamefreak but rather the fucking corporate investors that forced an obviously crunch-induced deadline. it has all the hallmarks of a game put under crunch, and while GF is quite famously press shy (especially after the dexit thing last gen), so we’ll probably not know the whole story unless someone does The Game Journalist and digs up as much of the story as they possibly can. 

 but alas i dont play pokemon for graphics. im mostly into battles and well, I was actualyl pretty surprised with some areas and parts.

i actually really like the idea of terrestalizing, and changing a pokemon’s typing to another thing. it opens up a lot of strat and team making that suddenly some mons which may have been held back by massive type weaknesses can now suddenly get a chance to shine in ways never before possible. the game really doesnt do it much justice since they basically treaded water for a majority of the big fights, but some notable outliers are out there. but some fights are a fucking joke at the point you reach them; WHY THE FUCK WOULD YOU PUT A FUCKING ***GOGOAT*** ON THAT PERSONS TEAM WHEN YOU LITERALLY COULD HAVE PUT ANYTHING. FUCKING. ELSE. ON IT I SWEAR TO FUCK I AM GOING TO CHOKE A FUCKER. that one battle (if you know you know) was so underwhelming bc of that team line up i still wonder who thought HM WE SHOULD DO THIS FOR THAT BATTLE. 

the real strengh of gen 9 is in its story characters in multiple fronts. After the fucking embarrassment of a rival that was fucking Hop, you’re greeted out the bat with a Champion rank trainer who basically just wants to Battle All the Things and wants a challenge again. This would be annoying as Nemona pops up all over the bloody place and at times much like the Hopeless Hop, but instead she tries to actually build the player character to reach her level so she can finally have the real challenge again.  it doesnt actually stop with nemona either, you also get introduced to Arven, a young man who is so Done with the Stupid Sanvich Addicted Lizard that he just gives it to you and now You have the unsubtle legendary which you can just ride in plain daylight and nobody bats a bloody eye. his line involves finding The Perfect Food Ingredient for personal reasons that also happen to be important for some reason. and then there’s the whole thing with Team Star, which as you progress you actually get a thing where, depending on how well your time in school was, you may very well understand and appreciate whats going on there.  unlike every other pokemon game out there, there’s no hard order for you to do things. if you wanna march right up to the strongest gym leader, the only thing there to stop you is pokemon well above yours in level, and the fact you will Get Your Shit Kicked In(ask me how i know). there’s rewards for talking to things and doing things unrelated to the main story line(s!) and taking a bit of time away from the battle and world to read things is a good way to get some decent rewards early game. and the final areas are actually p. gud in terms of what they bring to the table, its what happens after the main story where things get Meh and enough for me to put down the game for a few months.

The (non performance/bugs) weakness of gen 9 right now is the lack of a real postgame. even sword and shield gave you a Battle Tower to just keep doing things. but after you clear every thing leading to what i see as the final task, you basically only have the tera raids and a tournament thing to do. and let me tell you those tera raids at their highest levels are, at the time of writing, are impossible to solo for me. you gotta have Friends to do em afaik and one fuck up or RNG Bullshit.tm will halt a run instantly. i don’t enjoy em, and since I have seen all that i deem to be seen for now, I am back into Monster Hunter Rise/Sunbreak where i am now mercy-killing infected monsters. There’s obviously going to be DLC for this game at some point, but lets face it with the Amount of Bugs currently plaguing it, i dont see that happening any time soon. closing notes, i know some of the tunes are bugged, but some of them are really, really fucking good. one of them beats out the famed Gen 5 tune for that type of trainer. if you know, you know and i will die on this hill that gen 9s is better than gen 5s. fight me. i also have found three shiny mons after not encountering a single one since 20-fucking-10. a Summer Deerling, a Houndour and a Skrelp (oooo!)

final drunk noivy ratings Story: 9.1/10, probably one of the strongest ones since gen 5 Battles: 7.5/10, terrestalizing is a cool concept, but the game doesnt deliver on it well enough anD SOME OF THE FIGHTS ARE A FUCKING JOKE, FUCKING GOGOAT MY FUCKING GOD. but some of the fights are up there in difficulty graphics/performance: lol its better than sword and shield. and then some. that first bar isn’t hard to clear for me. but it does enough out side of the glaring bugs to convince me that yea it was ok purchasing it day one. probably won’t do that for gen 10.

[heartfelttry]

i am replying to JacFrostIsReal's video here (about the Joker, how fictional mysteries being unsolved are just as valuably and narratively important as fictionally solved ones, "Mediocre White Man Syndrome"™, how she loved Red Hood Joker, and a bit about Two-Face. intrigued? yes, good, go watch her tiktok, go give her engagement please) bc this got way too long for a comment, or even a comment thread wHICH IS SAYING SOMETHING FROM ME (I LEAVE COMMENT THREAD MONOLOGS LIKE NOBODY'S BUISNESS) but ill put it under a read more out of politeness

my reply's bullshit of a summary: but yeah, the below is a Joker headcanon about "the true Joker's identity" and how i personally reconcile with the three main Jokers types (not identities. but types. we got what i call "Adam West Joker", "Agent of Chaos Joker", and "Grim-Dark Joker". this trio. here. that's what i mean) with all this hullabaloo of canon trying so bad to go "but what's his name, what's his story??" and me smacking DC's hand away from this Schrodinger's Cat of a cookie jar labeled "Joker" with this hc, happily, every time. enjoy?

reminder that i am dyslexic and i havent REALLY edited this stream of consciousness, so, like, be nice when i inevitably mispell/make typos lol also this was originally going to be a tiktok comment-thread so some odd things like "dead" are censored here and there before i realized mid-way "this is too long. i cant do a thread this long" lmao rip im just too exhausted today to edit atm. disability, chronic illness symptoms, c'est la vie lol

omg i have had the most wild TOTALLY HEADCANON answer to this, all bc im like "i wanna make a Gotham OC fanfic (.......yes the one with Kaycie that's kinda the only other post in this blog, stfu, lemme finish), but im too sickly to do it rn. ill just plot it for now on and off" and part of my plotting was "how do i want to approach Joker and his 'true identity' bs??" bc taking what canon from where for this fic was important to me as it was part of the plot i want to do. but like?? there's some comics i love where i just.. ignore their idea for Joker's backstory. cognitive dissonance that. but i implement other canon from those comics. v much cherry-picking; idgaf, thats THE way to go about comics. so i was like "what canons am i cherry-picking for this fanfic version of Joker?" and my eventual idea became my hc foR ALMOST ALL CONTEMPORARY JOKERS EVER and ill share it, sure, i love to info-dump

bc i came up with an answer that (admittingly idk ALL OF THE INTERNET EVER so maybe i independently came up with the same idea as someone else, but, this is my pitch, totally original to me specifically as far as i am aware:) makes both all the "real" Jokers "canon" and also NONE of them canon, and instead re-inforces the mystery of nobody knowing who the fuck this guy is

and that's that he "heals quickly" by seeing Professor Pyg (at 🔫point probably) and just.. getting a new fucking whatever's-broken

leg-broke? amputate and replace. wrist arthritis? amputate and replace. so on and so forth

but we dont see scars or anything bc, in my hc, he brings some of that acid with him when he sees Pyg (from when he first fell. we know he likely knows its ingredients since, tons of comics, he re-creates it for Harley) (also i like how this idea brings Pyg more to the forefront by proxy. bc Joker's laughing gas and Pyg's "perfect" people are such traumatizingly similar victims who are done in by two totally different people. my squeamish heart is so glad Pyg isnt Well Known outside of comic fans, but the nerd inside me doesnt get WHY he hasnt been part of pop culture osmosis alongside Joker yet wtf). so the acid is like an Even More Fucked Up Version Of The Lazarus Pit but that doesnt grant you immortality and has more cons than it could ever be worth, but Joker loves his "daddy/mommy vat" (you cannot tell me he doesnt call that vat some cringe parental nickname lol, i just wont buy it). the acid does bizarro healing-fast, no-scars nonsense. and the Joker's upped usage of it explains why his skin tends to chemically paper-white and Harley Quinn's (who also fell in the vat in some stories) tends to be her in white make-up. so: his skin-tone then isn't make-up, it's his skin, all bc he keeps re-applying that acid shit, whereas Harley only did it ONCE. and it didnt fuck her up as bad since she doesnt come back for more when she could just let her bones heal. (plus, him doing this stuff?? to me, it connects him a bit further to "The Joker's Daughter", like him replacing bit of himself foreshadows how she wears his face as a mask...)

...anyway, BUT AS A RESULT, he is leaving DNA of all these other people that are "the true identity of Joker". but like. they both are not Joker (theyre victims of Joker and Pyg) and ARE the Joker (theyre part of him). so all those idenities?? none of them are probably the true og Joker who first went to Pyg with a body that was 100% his own (and was using white make-up at the time) with a small vat of the acid going 🔫 "i have a commissioned offer for you that i wont let you refuse, Pyggy". theyre probably just a List Of Victims. you could even then argue all these versions of "the Joker's backstory reveal" are then just forensics and profilers trying to piece together "how did [Name] become the Joker?" and sensationalizing their interpretation, and the comics are "people trying to canonize those theories as fact via their fictional adaptation of this theory" (im aware this is loopy in a multi-verse way buT SHHH SHHH SHH); all having no idea yet that every [Name] there was actually a victim of Pyg and Joker's. how could they know? how could they guess the "reality" within this hc is that the Joker is a personified Ship Of Theseus?? he's like a mosaic from the Byzantine era, of how many pieces of other people he has; or like a stain-glass sculpture; or like the Creature from "Frankenstein" if Viktor Frankenstein became the Creature himself bit by bit. maybe the Joker has even had parts of his brain replaced with other people's (to the point that it becomes "who knows whose brain this originally was" to which all "hey science doesnt work like—"/"iTS COMICS THO. WE HAVE THE LAZARUS PITS ALREADY, THE ACID CAN BE A FUCKED UP PROVERBIAL MEWTWO MAN-MADE VERSION OF RA'S AL GUHL'S MEW. LET THE PSEUDO-SCIENCE HAPPEN. IT'S COMICS. HE CAN SURVIVE THAT MUCH BRAIN TRANSPLANT ON REPEAT NOW" arguments are kinda nullified with) with this glaze of The Acid ontop to allow the blend to Work— bc he keeps using this acid, causing himself to potentially develop ťúmóŕś and needing them removed (and maybe Pyg does secret lobotomies or some shit and sees "what if i replace this part while im at it..??" to see if this makes the Joker "more bareable" to be around, idk). as a result of this absurd desire to never have an injury delay him: even upon his hypothetical autopsy, they'll never know his true identity. forensics and profilers who had been having debates analyzing evidence to "uncover" who the Joker is will be revealed to have had a vast misunderstanding of the dark truth

BUT SAYING THAT?? i still miss past Jokers. before people tried attaching a name to him (that's part of the motivation for me with this hc, just going "actually?? yOURE ALL WRONG, TO ME, SPECIFICALLY" lmao rip). like. for one, i miss shitty-at-villainy chaos "im literally the luckiest fucker alive" gremlin Joker (legit? Jason Todd's situation?? proverbially Joker being a "i am eating the chess pieces whenever Batsy isnt looking, and he is confused how i could be winning"). like he isnt a master-mind. he's lucky as hell, he is legitimately Murphy's Law as a bratty villain, the most legitimate "agent of chaos" a person could be, he has no plans, he's flying by the seat of his pants and keeps going "oh sick, im in THE most optimal place somehow so Batman cant kill me for what i just did". liKE WHAT DO YOU MEAN HE STUMBLED INTO BECOMING A DIPLOMAT AFTER JASON TODD'S ḌẸÄṬĤ?? HE GOT SO LUCKY, GOT IN THE PERFECT SITUATION SO SUPERMAN HAD TO RELUCTANTLY GO "dont do it, Batman, itll cause an international incident, ẃáŕ, Jason wouldnt want that, he wouldnt want civillians to ḍịẹ in his name" TO THIS GRIEVING FATHER—??? absurd. dont even talk to me about the Adam West TV show version of Joker (i miSS HIM AND EARTHA KITT CATWOMAN THE MOST), i miss when he was just a silly goofy guy even more than his agent of chaos phase, ugghhhh.. "Adam West Joker", this man was my Megamind before "Megamind" (minus the whole "happy hero ending with the girl" part). just a dude who never won, always was foiled, up to dasterdly Doofenshmirtz hijinks, no grim-dark wild shit yet. i loved him, i miss him

so my hc doesnt work as well on those variations of the Joker, predominantly "Adam West's Joker" as i sloppily label him (i know its oversimplification shhhhh). buT IT DOES WORK ON GRIM-GRITTY EVIL-MASTERMIND-4D-CHESSMASTER JOKER and thats probably all that matters to these Mediocre White Man Syndrome™ variants. idk

[[ quick, here's an edited bit from a DM where i realize i forgot a point i LOVE about the mystery of who the fuck "Adam West Joker" was: ]]

(which. i forgot to go into that i think there's at least one comic who mentions this brand of Joker in an existential "maybe he isnt a person, maybe he just appeared from the universe. maybe Gotham made bad luck personified" or some shit, im not a big fan of "he is not human"-Joker but i am a fan of "yes, people even thought of the Doofenshmirtz variety of the Joker as more myth than Once Possibly Mundane (even tho he's just a guy that no one knows and that that forensics tech just is incapable of recognizing. meaning this man was so normal before he became This that he was THAT off-grid and unrecognizable, like THAT harmless of a person, like what?? and now people in-comic-world are having such a hard time grappling with these unknowns that they're going "what if he is just not a fucking person. he's murphy from murphy's law. alive. how does anyone beat that" whEN HE IS JUST A GUY?? A GUY THEY JUST KNOW ***NOTHING*** ABOUT?)". i love that version of him. he was my Megamind before "Megamind" lmao (...anyway i might copy & paste this "he's just a guy. it drives them insane that they cant prove that he JUST A GUY that theyre mythologizing him— even before Red Hood lore and grim-dark shit got added" belatedly into that post now. but yeah i just forget from what comic exactly bc ✨️chronic memory loss✨️ + 🌈library🌟 lol rip)

but yeah. i do want to mention the Red Hood thing is kinda new, relatively, to Joker's lore; he was originally a true fucking mystery where we didnt get even THAT vague bit of Red Hood. he just.. showed up. what was his trauma? who knows. why is he like this, why does he look like this?? who knows. like, okay, that's badass and funny as fuck, good for "Adam West Joker", love that. i miss "nobody can find out SHIT about this man" version of Joker so badly; all we know is his "ɗīę laughing" thesis

but yeah. Red Hood (Jason) and Red Hood (Joker) is stiLL SO SO SOOOO important to me that, though im still like "Joker is a total mystery. forensics finds NOTHING on this lil Adam West co-star/pre-Megamind-before-Megamind-but-no-hero-ending of a guy" is a canon multi-verse version of Joker to me, i happily accept that Red Hood is a part of "agent of chaos" Joker's lore and "grim-dark mastermind" Joker's lore. 2 out of 3 aint bad. but my hc about Joker going all 🔫 "fix. me." to Prof Pyg works A+ in grim-dark Joker lore. and my hesitation about "agent of chaos Joker lore" is that, to MEEEE, my Pyg hc only works if its "agent of chaos Joker lore after Jason Todd đīēđ (or at least, like, if he started just before Jason ḍịẹḍ and was building up to Jason's said ɗęąţĥ); bc before JT ðıəð/before Joker started building up to brutalize Jason like that, Joker wasnt AS vîôłêňť as he became to be known as... (still massively violent. but not AS much, like he was a bit of clutching-his-punched-gut "they'll all see" type for a bit beforehand if i recall accurately.) but post-JT? yeah, my Pyg hc could quickly apply". so again: 2 out of 3 multi-verse variants? aint bad, ill take that happily

but yeah, feel free to adopt my hc for any time someone goes "he's Jack Oswald White/Jack Napier/Arthur Fleck/whoever-the-fuck", thats what i do. bc then, yeah, "they're all Joker" but also none of them are with this Ship Of Theseus hc. whos the victim, whos real? nobody knows. my preference is obviously "all the people science has found have only been victims; nobody has found the og Joker's true identity" bc i liKED THAT MYSTERY AND THIS IS ME RET-CONNING IT. but i gUESS if you had a favorite version of "who is the real Joker" then the og COULD be that one. but like. why would you?? the mystery is so much better (...tO ME, but whatever), like imagine a Spencer Reid type of guy coming out and "actually, considering the commonalities in how all these people disappeared? implies they were ALL likely victims of Pyg and Joker. for years, we were arguing and accusing the victims of being the murder; it's probably the Joker's biggest, cruellest joke. because, really, we're back where we started. nobody truly knows the real name of the man who 'collaborated' with Pyg for the first time. and we may very well never know". like? how does that not excite the fuck out of you so much more?? headcanons are headcanon, but yours baffles me if you prefer Knowing The Joker's True Name to any of the variant versions or my hc version of Nobody Knows Who The Joker Is Or Where He Came From. jac is so super right, i love her

anyway. uh. pray the universe gives me a medical treatment That Fucking Works at nullifying my chronic illness symptoms if you want this fanfic to ever be a thing so i can write this plot-twist of a hc about "who is the Joker" into a story. feel free to adopt the hc tho. i ask vaguely for credit if you want to copy my hc one-for-one, but MOSTLY what i want is to be @'ed so i can squeal and giggle and see what you made lmao

but i dont anticipate this hc will go viral or something. very unlikely, in my mind. im just saying that as a safety-net in this proverbial trapeze act of a post lol

buT ALSO THANK YOU JAC FOR EVERYTHING YOU SAID ON TWO-FACE, I COULD NOT AGREE MORE. i went from a Joker fan to ".....ew too many people like the Joker in ways i dont, i feel gross now, i need a shower" and came out the other side of that as a Bruce Wayne/Batman × Harvey Dent/Two-Face truther bc they are doomed yaoi in the silliest and most tragic of senses, theyre foils, your honor, i love them (also if we are gonna keep Catwoman × Batman going, imma need sO MANY MORE PEOPLE from both DC and fans being inspired by Eartha Kitt's Catwoman design bc Eartha Kitt is a badass, go look her up, find out why she got replaced as Catwoman on the Adam West "Batman" show, ive been obsessed with this woman since i was like 8 years old and the world neeDS TO JUMP ON MY BANDWAGON ALREADY. i need more Black, Eartha-Kitt-looking Catwoman in my life stat aND, BATCAT, MY LIFE WILL BE YOURS) ....anyway, go watch Jac's video, go give her views, comments, engagement, she's so great and i want to (a) see her do more Gotham FYP skits (tho the Mob Waitress one is so close to a Gotham absurdism that i am happy with that, Jac, dont think i dont get excited when that series appears on my fyp) and (b) do more Batman breakdowns, bc i love hearing women of all backgrounds talk comics, comic-movies, comic-shows— but esp girly-girls. it itches my brain. i need more of it. go give her love, immediately, please

[lemedstudent2021]

hi there! this is the best recipie that i could find that looks the closest to the real thing, but i have a few improvements/ additions to make it extra authentic as per where im from lol

disclaimer; the version i know and love can be pretty heavy on the oil (now you know why so many of us have health problems lmho) but its absolutely worth it :D

the link, my additions:

the vegetables are typically fried not baked, and they are cooked only half way ish so they dont dissolve while cooking within the pot with everything else. fry them (if u choose to) and set them aside on some kitchen towels and behold the amount of oil u will find (no srsly expect to be contacted by america)

can be made with chicken (what we do at home mostly) which can also be fried (for the colour) or boiled with spices and onions so u can use the stock to cook the rice

i personally cannot vouch for the measurements bc theyre typically eyeballed (this comes with years of practice lol… kinda like the 'keep adding till my ancestors tell me to stop' XD) but thats why i linked the recipie in the first place.

cooking meat may take forever, so u can use a pressure cooker to speed things up. alternatively u can go for chicken instead. never use fish or i will personally haunt u. you can use vegetables only of course if thats what ur looking for (aubergine, cauliflower, potatoes, carrots and courgettes are all popular options) but i dont know how it will taste with vegetable stock.

dont forget to wash ur rice! for the dust/ dirt and excess starch and its common to let them sit (after rinsing) in water for some time, though i have no idea why lol. i think so literally all the ingredients are somewhat cooked so it doesnt take too long in the pot?

once youve got everything, start layering sliced tomatoes/ sweet peppers at the bottom of the pot (even the best and most slow cooked of maqloobehs burn, so use something dispensible. the bottom of the pot is actually an entire genre of food here and is much loved by many. do with that information what u will)

layer the veggetables, choice of protein, and rice (nothing too specific, id reccomend rice- veg and chicken-rice) then the broth

when it comes to serving, uncover the pot, have a flat tray ready (metal trays are super common here, but literally anything can be used, be extrememly careful tho if u plan on flipping it with something like a ceramic plate tho just in case) heres a demonstration

another disclaimer; the pot will likely be hotter than the surface of the sun, only seasoned middle eastern mothers can accomplish feats like this so please be careful. i will not taking responsibility for any injuries sustained in the making of this dish.

nvm just found a yt short explaining it better oops :')

✨enjoy✨

lol. With Biden saying the word "intifada" is antisemitic, and this moron claiming the keffiyeh is Hamas attire, it seems all zionists can do is just lie and hope their audience is too stupid or uninformed to know any better.

[hyunverse]

my love please buy real food you deserve it 🙏🏼 especially on your period !!! that sucks so much you don’t have any sushi near you :(( maybe one day you can get some stuff to make like make shift sushi ?! gahhhhh ur so cute i cry <//3 ur just as much an angel baby 💗💗💗 AND IM SO EXCITED FOR THATTTT !!!!!! angst is life rn bc i LIVE for it

it’s pretty much just a story about these 3 sirens who lured these sailors into their deaths by their singing. i just rly like the way it’s written and the “lessons” behind it. those kinds of stories w hidden lessons or messages are always my fave !! YESSSS that fits hyunjin so well omfg. poor baby just wants love 💔💔💔. we are the same hyune 🙏🏼

andddddddd i’m tearing up :((. UR TOO KIND TO ME I CANT HANDLE IT !!! you have no idea how much that means to me :((((((. i say the exact same things about you, you are so so kind and such a good person. i feel like you’re the kind of person that could be easily trusted and i value that sm in people. you always make my days so much better as well, i look forward to all your responses and to your writing bc you just get it 💗. so thank YOU for being here in the first place. ur genuinely one of the most special and kindest and talented and thoughtful and smart and beautiful ppl i’ve ever met on here in all my years on this app 🙏🏼. you rly are a gem <333 i could go on for days about how much i adore you !! no joke !!!!!!! i’m very glad i came across your acc bc you and your writing have helped me through so much already <33

ahhhh yes you’re a smart one for that !! (i am not at all and just hope i find stuff in person, when i pretty much never do 😁) the holidays in your culture are so cool i’m always so intrigued by them ^_^

OOO HOTPOT W HYUNE YESSSS PLSSSSS !!!!!! you cant tell me would not only cook, but also feed you food. he’d just be like no you’re not lifting a finger and i’m doing all the work bc ur my precious angel who shouldn’t and won’t lift a finger anytime she’s with me 😇😇😇. yes pls !!!!!!!! i think i might have to write some soon bc i’m in such a fluffy mood lately. my fave is angst to fluff so maybe even that ?? i love big fights that turn into crying cuddle sesh’s mhm mhm. that w minho would make my year so maybe i’ll start w that 🤔

- 🐈‍⬛ even cuter pics gahhh ur so sweet :(( hugs and kisses i hope you sleep well my love 💗💗💗 manifesting hyune to sneak into ur dreams tehehe

yaaaa good idea!!! i’m pretty sure sushi ingredients can be found around here ^__^ thank u thank u i nvr thought of that <3 me?? an angel?? THANK U HEHE <3 i don't deserve it but thank you, darling. i'm sorry it took a while to talk to u, i've been swamped in assignments, i barely have any time for myself </3 eid break starts next week though, so that's nice hehe. hopefully i'll be able to talk and write more then!!

just read the siren story, omg their names are so complicated HELP... greek names, man. odysseus encountered the sirens during his journey home, right? if i'm not mistaken hehe.

i'm not being too kind angel, it's purely the truth. i'm flattered that you think of me the same, i could never picture myself to be even half as sweet as you T__T we're the same then because i could a 100% talk abt u all day!!

hehe i'd gladly talk abt my culture with u!! wait till eid, i'll drop fit pics here <3!! also wait did i ever show u my oddinary pulls?? i dont rmmbr if i did aaaa

RIGHT RIGHT HE WUD!!! HE'S THE SIT TIGHT PRINCESS, I'LL DO THE WORK FOR U KIND OF BOYFRIEND!!! i want him saur bad... omg i feel like he'd mix u the dipping sauces and stuff... i'll start crying at the thought of this. TENSION THAT FADES TO FLUFF >>> EAT THAT UP!!! I EAT THAT UP FR!!!

i have been dreaming of hyune lately tbh... it's been <3333 my dreams be so good. anyway! hope ure having a good week so far my sayang!!! (it means love in malay!!)

kithkithkith <3

[bellsliturgy]

sry for the lack of activity on my part here it’s been v stressful wrt the crimis season i’m dealing with a lot of small things and a couple really big things and it makes me want to eat my own hands more details under the cut if ur interested (tw mention of a horrible certain swamp scum transphobe author; fellow transpersons beware)

1) my gma is 85 and is on her last legs idk how much longer she’s got left in her and with her being in the hospital with afib (atrial fibrillation for those who dont know, basically her heart is beating 2 fast and out of rhythm (but afib can be any kind of heart beating speed, it just means it’s Not Normal) and the winter storm she is staying with us which means my mom is more Aggressive and Demanding and Hateful towards me and dad bc idk i guess hosting ur small quiet kind grandma calls for attacking your husband and child (very important ingredient cannot skip)(btw my grandma is fine she’s just very weak and is struggling to physically move around by herself but insurance company is refusing to let her go to a physical rehab center for treatment???? lol????? hashtag AICAB (all insurance companies are bastards)

2) speaking of whom i also came out to my mom as trans after an argument abt justa kunt r*wling (mom doesnt know anything abt how nasty of a creature wizard bitch is but i’m still like mom pls there are better authors out there with fictional work that isn’t harmful) book that she bought for my cousin’s step-daughter (she’s fucking NINE) and i was so triggered i was like i need to get this out it’s weighing on me (it was every time i wanted to come out to her and didn’t it was so damaging to me mentally) so that was wild and lukewarm but she didn’t kick me out of the house and says she loves me and wouldn’t reject me no matter what (unless grandma is around??? for some reason idk) so while that is a good thing it’s still been a very hard birthday month for ya boi greg

3) i’m also on the phones at work which in itself isn’t a bad thing because the calls i get are from ladies who work at the courts across the state and they are for the most part very nice and easy to work with but i have Big Phone Anxiety thanks to my time working at the call center for the same agency (i don’t even answer the phone at home anymore and i get scared when it rings, members of public are nasty and i hate them and they belong in a zoo) so that’s causing me anxiety at night andd also at work even tho when i’m actually talking on the phone it’s not really an issue it’s just the Anticipation of a Call

4) i’m in therapy!!!! with a transgender therapist and he’s WONDERFUL but we are focusing more on cbt (cognitive behavioral therapy) which is digging up a lot of pain for me and forcing me to deal with my emotions and my past trauma so THAT’s A LOT and now i have “I came Out to my MOM” for him for next time so that will be interesting (i need to just let myself cry in front of him i have a VERY hard time crying in front of ppl bc i was horribly abused for crying at a babysitter’s house but that’s 1) very heavy and 2) neither here nor there)

5) BEACUSE OF ALL THE STRESS and cold weather my lip split open and 2 canker sores formed in the split area so that’s been cool

6) christmas is just stressful for me and also my mom has been On One this whole month because murphy’s law keeps going into effect w grandma being in the hospital and her brother my uncle suggesting we have christmas separate because of covid (he and my aunt both had covid VERY recently), grandma being sick in the hospital, and the winter storm and i also have 3 cakes i’m baking so THAT’s stressful to think about and i just want it to be over lollll

[olivyh]

someone play big bank ft nicki minaj bc uh oh, back again

IM SO SORRY i am so in love with your writing

may i request someone falling into a deep sleep (either the reader or the character- it can be diff for every scenario if u want !!) and the other person has to perform True Love’s Kiss™ but it goes wrong (nothing too angsty pls im too weak)

like

that one scene between luz and hunter from the owl house, somebody falls, the cpr kiss between apple white and darling (man there are a lot of failed kisses in media) and any other shenanigans you can think of

with riddle, jamil, neige, ace/deuce, jade, and anyone else you want to do !

tysm in advance !!

A/N: OH MY GOODNESS THANK YOU SO MUCH??? AND PLEASE DONT APOLOGIZE I LOVE SEEING WHAT OTHER PEOPLE WANT TO READ!! I also have some spare time before stuff picks up later in the semester, so I'm getting most of my writing done now ;;;; I never watched any of those shows, so I just went with 'gone wrong after', if that's alright!

Riddle:

-He knew that mer was up to no good, especially when Floyd outright ASKED to be Riddle's partner

-Despite his gut instinct, he went along with it and, of course, Floyd threw in one of the ingredients sitting on the shelf, the entire jar sinking below the surface of the potion that threatened to bubble over and spill

-It never bubbled over, rather it EXPLODED

-Riddle would have lost his mind screaming if it wasn't for the way that his head began spinning and how quickly he seemed to be falling to the ground.

-Ace and Deuce, of course, were the ones who came to grab you, hoping to save their dorm leader

Outside of the infirmary, you stand with your arms crossed, glaring at both the boys. 

"Have you forgotten that I have no magic? I can't wake him up," Ace groans, rolling his eyes. 

"But if you do, he might feel, oh, I don't know, indebted? So he'll feel bad when he goes to collar us." You fight the urge to smack Ace and look to Deuce, who's staring at the ground in shame. 

"You too?" The blue haired boy doesn't respond and you sigh. "What do you want me to do?"

"Well, there's this fairytale thing..." Ace starts with, face breaking into a grin. "And it says it'll break any curse, so-"

"Are you talking about the-?!" You punch his arm, face flushing a bright red. "I knew you were up to something stupid!"

"You like him, he likes you! What, did ya want Deuce to kiss him?!"

"What the fuck, Ace?" Deuce shoves Ace, who cackles and turn to you, walking forwards quickly and making you stumble back into the infirmary, quickly slamming the door closed and yelling from the other side. 

"Good luck, Prefect~" Ace coos. "Oh, I also told Trey that you woke him up already. Won't wanna make our resident baker sad, would we? He told me that he'd make you something as a thank you~"

"Damn you, Trappola," More laughter as footsteps echo down the hallway and disappear, leaving you in the dimly lit infirmary. 

Just you. 

And an unconscious Riddle. 

You take a breath, sitting on the edge of the bed and staring down at his soft face. He was always boyishly handsome in a way that made your heart flutter whenever he looked in your direction, his stern gaze never failing to make you swoon, much to Ace's dismay. Now that he's asleep, calloused hands for once unclenched and relaxed at his sides, you can take a moment to notice the small things about him that you don't have the chance to normally see. 

Everything from the small freckle that sat upon his eyelid, to the dark circles under his eyes, to the way that his face, even in sleep, was still flushed a light pink. You slowly grab his hand and feel a wave of sadness to find it cold. You wonder if he's ever had someone hold his hand, if it was always this cold, if the scowl that was no longer on his face was how he would look no matter what or if it was an expression trained into his soft features.

Biting your lip, you look to the door and back, deciding to suck it up and kiss your crush from the beginning of the school year. 

You slowly lean in, lips connecting to his own slightly chapped ones before pulling away slowly. You notice how his crimson eyelashes flutter, his chest rising much higher than it had as he takes a deep breath. His cool gray eyes open to meet your own, thin lips forming a small smile as his half-lidded eyes take in your features. 

Until it sets in. 

His hand rushes to his mouth and he sits up quickly, making you lean back as to not bump his head. He gapes, mouth opening and closing as a bright red rises up his neck, soon covering his entire face. Riddle stares at you for a moment, terrified before making a sound that was something akin to a dying hamster, scrambling as far from you as possible and trying to get off the bed.  

Mumbling to himself quickly, mind seemingly in a frenzy to explain the situation, to find a way other than his first kiss was when he was asleep. 

He didn't seem to notice how the blanket got tangled in his and your legs, pulling both of you to the ground with a loud thud. He also didn't seem to notice Professor Crewel standing in the open doorway, the antidote in hand, eyebrow twitching at the scene before him. 

"You couldn't wait two seconds?!" The professor groans. 

Ace/Deuce:

-Both of them were dumb, and partnered up during potions class, accidentally making a potion that exploded all over them both

-What did you expect? You should have offered to separate the two rather than agreeing to Partner with Sebek during the joint lessons...

-Now you're stuck with two sleeping idiots while the professor works on a solution

-It's Epel who suggests that you kiss him to wake him up

"Oh, come on, Prefect!" Epel sighs. "It's not that bad! Besides, we all know that you like him!"

Ace route:

"Why would you think I liked him?!" You retort, frowning at the lilac haired boy, who shrugs. 

"You two are always together, even when Deuce isn't there!" Epel fights back. "And he was the first one you met here..."

"He's-he's Ace! He's a bully, and doesn't think at all, and is-is-"

"Just kiss him!" 

You scoff, looking down at the sleeping redhead, eyes tracing over the light freckles that crossed over the bridge of his nose. It was weird seeing his face look so... peaceful. For most of when you'd known him, he'd always have a shit-eating grin or a pout. He was always so expressive and seeing him look so still made something in your heart ache. 

For a moment, you think about what would happen if he didn't wake up. Epel was right about one thing- that he was your closest and oldest friend here. 

He may be annoying and a general menace, but he was still your menace. Ace was still the boy who would do anything to make you smile after Crowley runs you ragged, he was still the same boy who would steal stuff from Heartslabyul's kitchen if he heard that you liked it, dropping it off at your dorm before shyly asking to stay the night because he was sure that Trey had seen him do it and that Riddle was hot on his trail. 

He was the one who protected you during countless overblots, throwing his life on the line and using as much magical power that he had to keep you safe. The one who made sure you ate every day, and had enough spare madol in your pockets for when you didn't have the time or the money to eat. 

You look at him before frowning, making your resolve. You look at Epel nervously, who apologizes and averts his eyes. Your eyes scan his face once more, lightly brushing some of his ruby hair off to the side as you lean in and press a light kiss to his lips, leaning back and trying to ignore Epel's gagging and laughter. 

Ace sighs, eyes slowly opening when you notice your hand was still resting on the crown of his head. You pull it back and the boy laughs softly, moving to sit up, raising an eyebrow. 

"You're a perv-" He snickers, making you huff and shove him lightly. "H-hey!"

You rush out of the room, hearing Epel's laughter grow into cackling as Ace's voice sounds from the infirmary. "It was a joke! I meant in a good way! A good perv!" Epel laughs harder as your face flushes and you rush back to Ramshackle. 

"Dumbass..." You mumble under your breath. 

Deuce Route:

"And?!" You retort, making Epel snort. 

"And he likes you," Rolling his eyes, he puts both hands on your shoulders and frowns, looking deep into your eyes, making you gulp at the intensity of his expression. "Prefect, on behalf of every first year student who is tired of watching you both be pathetic around each other-"

"Okay, Vil~" He lightly smacks your arm.

"Shaddup!"

Laughing, you pull away from him, fighting the blush that creeps up your face as you stare down at Deuce's sleeping expression, lips slightly parted accompanying the soft rise and fall of his chest.

"And imagine how happy you would make Ms. Spade~" Ah, his secret weapon- Deuce's mother who had taken a liking to you due to how often Deuce tells her about you. After learning of your 'other world' situation, she began talking to you more and more often, checking to see how you were doing or if you needed anything. She even offered to allow you to live with her and Deuce over the duration of summer break should you still be here, already making plans to take you out to get clothes of your own (rather than hand me downs from your friends, as well as from the dorm leaders and the teachers). 

"Okay, okay, I'll do it..." You mumble. Epel pulls out his phone, camera on when you push him out of the room, huffing at his muffled laughter from behind his hand. "You could be such a bully sometimes!"

"Have fun!" You watch him disappear down the hallway and close the door to the infirmary, sighing as you sit on the edge of the bed, lightly toying with the flimsy sheet that covered the boy. 

Smiling, you attempt to fix the smudged spade that covered his eye with your thumb, only managing to smear the makeup further across his face and down his cheekbone. You can't help but rest your makeup-stained hand on his face, feeling how much his body temperature had dropped in his sleep. 

Normally when you would help him with his makeup his face was so warm as you held it in your hands, pleading for him to stay still and stop squirming so you can make the shape look neat. You can't seem to forget that same warmth that he would hold when you would both sleep on the floor during sleepovers, the two of you sleeping back to back in between the rest of the first years, legs barely intertwining with one another. 

And how his face would flush as you tutored him, feeling his labored breaths dust over your face as you backed away, realizing how close you had gotten to him while trying to explain the problem. The same flush that painted his face after you would thank him for everything, patching up his wounds when he would get into fights on your behalf, silently weeping about how he was doing so well and went back to his old ways. He would let you hold him close then, every ounce of shyness pushed out of his system as he sniffled and you reassured him that he was going great, that you were glad he was there to be your knight in shining armor...

You wanted to see that comforting shade of red again. 

Leaning in, you press a kiss just shy of his lips, the corners of your mouths connecting before you shyly lean back, watching his eyelids shoot open.

He gasps and you feel an immense pain in your stomach, winching and hissing as you grab the spot that you realized he had hit. 

"P-prefect!" His face pales when he realized that he just had his fairytale moment, and also that he had kissed- and, on instinct, punched- his true love. "I'm so, so, so sorry!"

The rest of the first years made fun of you both- Deuce on the verge of tears apologizing and begging for forgiveness and you with a massive bruise on your stomach, holding an icepack to the spot. He promised he would make it up to you later- or you could hit him back.

Ruggie:

-Ate something completely on accident. He was so hungry after his shift, and the fruits on that tree just looked so good... and don't blame him! They looked like normal apples, and they smelled and tasted the same, especially to his half asleep and starved self

-He was passed out in the forest near Ramshackle when you were making your way to Sam's shop, noticing the familiar pair of hyena ears peeking out from within a bush

-You pull him out with a little bit of a struggle, what with the branches getting stuck on his clothes and hair as you attempt to yank him out

-Finally, you manage to get him on his back on the ground, pulling the twigs out of his hair and noticing how, in sleep, his ears still twitch when you accidentally brush too close. 

-You shake him a few times, getting more and more nervous when you realize that he wasn't responding

-You pinch his cheek, blow on his face, pulling his ears, you even dump half of your water bottle on him

-You call Leona in a panic, the lion grumpy about being woken up from his nap

-He tells you that he'll tell someone, which you highly doubt, and adds a second solution before hanging up on you

"-or ya can always kiss him."

"Leona, what do you-?!" The sound of a beep signaling the end of the call makes you huff, face alight from the prince's suggestion. You put your phone in the grass, mind racing about what you could do to help him, the kiss echoing throughout your skull and making your heart skip a beat. You fumble to make yourself busy as to get rid of the thought, a blush creeping up your neck at the suggestion as you peeked over to the unconscious hyena beastman.

You feel a stab of pity once you see his vacant expression, freckled and scarred face shifting every once in a while as a reaction to whatever dreams he was having. His brown hair streaked with blonde sways in the afternoon breeze, some of it blowing into his eyes. You hesitantly reach over to brush it away, getting to see the small details you're never close enough to notice. 

The heavy freckles that coat his entire face, thickly concentrated on his cheeks and along the bridge of his nose. The light scarring from scraps he'd told you about getting into growing up. You lightly run your thumb over the light nicks that lined right below his bottom lip, small white lines that indicate where he'd accidentally scraped himself while growing in his fangs- a common occurrence amongst beastmen. If your eyes traveled down, you could notice the thin, crack-like scars that creep up his neck and disappear below his collar from Leona's overblot. 

You also take a moment to notice just how... frail he seemed when he wasn't as active as he always is. The purplish-blue circles under his eyes that seem even deeper with how his eyes seemed to be sunken in. How narrow his face was, cheekbones prominent. You grab one of his rough, calloused hands in your own, noticing how large his hand was compared to the rest of his forearm. Frowning, you run your hand over his features, wishing that the boy would allow himself a break or at least accept your offer to take over his jobs for him. That he didn't think he owed you anything for trying to help him. 

You couldn't deny your crush on him, not even if you wanted to. His clever tricks and pranks never failed to make your heart flutter- and annoy you. No matter how much of an act you could put up, how angry you pretended to be when he stole your bag and wouldn't give it back until you shared your lunch with him, when he purposefully annoyed Grim and ran away, you were sure that he could see through it. 

You wouldn't undermine his intelligence so much as to think he didn't notice your nervous stammering, the surefire blush that would make it's way onto your face whenever he got to close. You're sure that only lead to him teasing you more to watch you sputter and try to regain your composure. 

Despite all of that, he was still one of your closest friends. He still checked up on you and often (jokingly) doted on you like a worried mother, trying to make you laugh during the times when the pressure of being alone in an alien world seemed to be too much. He would still take time out of his busy day to teach you some tricks about the world, how to get around and get things done with or without the help of magic. He even went so far as to share some of his food with you when he noticed how Grim seemed to be your priority, how you would put him before yourself, neglecting your health. 

Despite how he seemed to most of NRC, he was still one of the sweetest, most hardworking, earnest, caring boys you had ever met. 

And, you decided, you would not let him wither away here. Sleep curse or not, you were going to wake him up!

You lean in and press a small, inexperienced kiss to his chapped lips, sitting back in the grass and watching as his nose twitches a few times, groaning and sitting up. His light gray-blue eyes open and he gapes at you, jaw hanging open as he presses a clawed hand to his lips, eyes wandering down to your own. 

"Y-you..." He mumbles, face flushing. "Do it-...do it again?"

You pause and nod, heart pounding as you lean in, your hand landing atop his own as  you both lean in, opting to close your eyes as you feel his warm breath on your face and-

Then you feel a tongue run along the bottom half of your face. You pull back, staring at Ruggie, this time it's your turn to have your jaw dropped. The boy stares, droopy eyes laced with mortification as his ears sit flat atop his head.

You cover your mouth, shoulders shaking as you laugh. 

"H-hey! Don't laugh!" He yells, face flushing a brighter red than you had ever thought you would see on the normally laid back boy. "It was my first kiss! I don't know what I'm doing!"

You ended up going on an actual date after that, as long as you swore on your life that you would never tell anybody what happened.

Jade:

-He invited you to go camping with him

-Most people would turn him down before you even asked, but you were hopelessly in love with the eel, so...

-Here you were, atop one of the mountains near campus, backpack in hand, being tasked with the job of holding the glass terrariums that the boy would put his findings in and trek back to campus with

-That is, until he touched a particularly fascinating mushroom that exploded in his face

-He fell to the ground, unconscious, and you panicked, immediately dropping the terrariums to fall to your knees and shake him, doing anything to try to wake him up

-On the verge of tears, you call his brother, who laughs at the situation

"Just kiss 'im, dummy!" That makes your tears stop as you sniffle and wipe your nose with your sleeve. 

"W-what?"

"Yeah, you kiss him and he'll wake up. It's a magic thing, you wouldn't get it," The other twin, starting to sound annoyed, groans when you hear Azul's voice in the background beckoning him back to his work station. "I can't!" A distant 'why?' from Azul, clearly fed up with Floyd. "Shrimpy killed my brother!" A louder 'what?!' followed by Floyd's laughter rings from the other side. 

"I gotta go!" He hums. "Try to bring him back in... at most three pieces, yeah? Mama would be pissed if I came home without him," You pick up on his soft snickers before the call drops and you drop the phone in disbelief, watching the eel mer sleep. You fashion a pillow out of your jacket, propping his head up so it's not rested against roots and rocks and bugs. 

You take a second to run your hands through his teal hair, twirling the black strand around your fingers a few times. "It couldn't be that bad..." You mumble, face heating up at the thought as you stare down at him, sighing as you continue to play with his hair strand, mumbling and swearing to yourself as it gets caught on his earring that glimmers in the afternoon sun. 

You work to untangle it, feeling his warm breaths against your forearm, which doesn't hep to stop the shaking of your hands. You try to keep yourself balanced, ducking down to see exactly where the hair strands were tangled. 

He had let you touch his shockingly soft hair once before, when you had asked. You ran your hand over the cold sturgeon scale earring, glad that you could finally touch it. Jade had told you the story behind him and his twin's shared earrings as well as other stories from their childhood, which captivated you to no end. 

Living under the sea? Swimming with sharks on a daily basis? Having a tail (or tentacles) rather than legs? It all seemed insane to you... and Jade seemed to take great pleasure in telling you all about his hometown. 

He had promised to take you there someday, which made you so excited you nearly dropped the glass cup you were drying off after your shift at Mostro, the eel chuckling and lightly chastising you for your clumsiness. 

How did he not know that you were in love with him? Someone as observant as him surely would have noticed your reactions around him- his brother sure did. 

And Floyd never let you hear the end of it. 

He also told you that his twin felt the same way, often going out of his way to push you two together as often as possible. you were considering begging their childhood friend for his help, but you were worried that he would try to take something, despite having changed his ways after his overblot. 

You could deny it all you wanted, but you could not deny how his soft touches made you feel. Everything from the gentle way he would look at you when he didn't think you would notice, to the gentle way he held your hands when he was helping you pitch your shared tent, to the domesticity of cooking dinner with him over the campfire the night before. 

Without thinking, you slowly kiss him, pulling away once you realized what you had done, face turning a bright red. 

Jade's eyes peek open, finding your own as his mouth breaks into a wide, toothy grin, one more earnest and softer than any you had seen. He silently holds your hands in his, moving to sit up as you hear something snap and watch as his body sways to the side before he cascades down the hill and disappears into the bushes. 

"Jade?!" You shout, scrambling after him and hearing his muffled groans and swears as he continues to plummet down the hill. "Jade, I'm coming! Hold on!"

Floyd lost his mind when you both came back and Jade had his arm in a sling, finding it hilarious how you managed to bring his brother home in pieces after all...

Jamil:

-It was during one of NRC's family events

-It was heavily guarded, but that still didn't mean that something wasn't going to happen

-Being the son of a wealthy merchant does get you enemies, but it also gives you people willing to do anything to get involved in the family

-So when Jamil taste tested one of the carnival snacks meant for Kalim and fell to the ground, the noble girl throwing a fit about how that was meant for Kalim and how she should have been the one to wake him up with a true love's kiss, all hell broke loose on campus

-Kalim, knowing that you were incredibly close to Jamil, dragged you to the infirmary, pleading for you to kiss his best friend and wake him up

"Kalim, I really can't-"

"Oh, please!" The boy grabs your hand in both of his, eyes brimming with tears and his bottom lip jutting out. "She-she said that the only way to wake him up would be true love's kiss! And he really, really likes you, so it has to be you!" You flush at his statement, hoping to pass it off as just being Kalim's optimism kicking in during the bad situation. 

"He's asleep! I-I can't just kiss him!" You shake your head, trying to fight the blush that creeps up your neck. "That's wrong!"

"I'm sure he'd understand!" The boy practically wails. "Just try, please!"

You sigh and try to shake him off, begrudgingly agreeing to help your friend. Of course, you'd been harboring a crush on the boy since you first met him before the Magshift match in October, the crush only growing throughout the rest of the year. His snide comments, dark humor, and responsible nature warmed your heart. Even when he acted like he didn't want your help with preparing dinner, or to help clean up the gym after basketball practice, he still joked and laughed with you. 

Even when you noticed how he hung his head with every little compliment you attempted to send his way, suddenly pulling his hood further over his eyes. 

You walk into the infirmary, Kalim excusing himself to give you both some privacy. You sit on the chair next to the bed, watching his sleeping face. After the fall, some of his hair had fallen out of his braids and ponytail, cascading down his face. You couldn't deny that he was attractive- his charcoal gray eyes that twinkled with mischief, the way he would bite his lip when he was practicing basketball, toned arms shifting with every move, practically glowing in the lights of the gymnasium. You couldn't help but admire him more when you reached out and toyed with one of the bells that decorated his hair, smiling softly to himself. 

The first time you watched him dance, you practically had to leave the room. His long hair that would swirl around him as he spun and stepped, his sharp eyes meeting yours and grinning, baring his slightly sharpened canines. The thought of the moment makes your heart skip a beat as you fight the urge to trace a finger over his sharp features, opting to settle your hand on his cheek, cupping it and running your thumb on the space beneath his eye. With your other hand, you brush a strand of hair out of his face, his sleeping form on display. You take a breath, leaning in and pressing a chaste kiss to his soft lips, backing away and covering your face from the effort. 

You watch his face slowly contort into a grimace, groaning as his eyes slowly open, a hand making it's way up to his cheek to hold your own. His hand feels so warm over your own, matching the slow heating of his cheek as you gulp. He gasps softly, quickly sitting up and turning to face you, mouth agape. 

"S-sorr-" He cuts you off by practically lunging at you, lips colliding with your own as you yelp and scramble for balance as the chair begins to rock, tipping backwards. Jamil swears and you hold onto him for dear life, one hand pulling his hair and the other awkwardly wrapped around his arm, as you both plummet to the floor.

You walked away with a sprained wrist and he walked away with a sore scalp and a nasty scratch on his forehead, but hey, at least you got a date out of it.

Neige:

-When you're in the public eye as often as he is, you tend to have a few fans who are willing to go above and beyond to get any sort of interaction with you

-Neige was well aware of this, just just couldn't refuse when one of his fans gave him a box of homemade chocolates, begging him to tell them how it tastes

-He obliged, despite the feeling in his gut as he took a bite of the apple-shaped chocolate, a caramel-like substance leaking out of the side

-One of the volunteers at the event managed to catch him before he hit the ground

-You, being there to support him during the meet and greet, were the second person to get to his side, shaking him and yelling at someone to grab security and a medic

-That's how you both landed here, in the city's hospital. 

You sat in the uncomfortable plastic chair at Neige's bedside, the endless flowers and cards sent by fans piling up in the room, barely leaving enough space for you all to walk through. You had to go live on Neige's magicam account on his behalf to thank everyone for their well wishes, but also to kindly ask them to stop sending extravagant bouquets due to the lack of room in the hospital, joking that the nurses were thinking of kicking you two out. 

You couldn't help but let your eyes wander over the chat, countless donors and commenters telling you to kiss him. 

"True love's kiss, huh?" You said aloud accidentally. 

'Yesss!'

'Ofc'

'its like the story, right?'

'they don't know about it?'

'do u think its gonna work?'

'it has to!!!!!!!! THEY'RE BOTH SO CUTE TOGETHERRR!'

You can't help but blush at the comments, quickly thanking everyone once more before turning the live video off, setting his phone off to the side. You were both well aware about your... fanbase. After seeing you and Neige attend so many events together, some of his fans had taken it to the next level. 

Fancams of the two of you two together, countless edits of your small moments together that the fans are adamantly arguing is proof of your relationship. You have both received fanart of the two of you together- ranging from very cute (a small drawing of the two of you together having a picnic) to... borderline uncomfortable (pictures of you two and your 'children' named and given personalities by the fan themselves...). You had even been sent popular fanfiction about the two of you from Cater, who laughed like a madman when you called him immediately after he sent the text, flustered and annoyed. 

Neige didn't seem to mind, even going as far as to point out the good things about even the worst things you two have been subjected to. ("The anatomy is very well done!" "Neige, it's creepy," You pouted, earning a nervous chuckle from his end.)

You wipe the remainder of his stage makeup off gently, patting his face down with one of the towels given to you by the hospital. The light mascara had smudged in the fray, not having enough time to clean his face off until just now. You gingerly wipe around his eyes and under his soft cheekbones, sighing in defeat when you notice that his long eyelashes don't even flutter at the touch. 

Of course you knew what true love's kiss was (aside from the perfume brand that Neige had modeled for a few months prior). Neige had told you the story once after being compared to the infamous Princess by a fan- a girl with an evil stepmother, stepmother orders to get her killed, she runs into the forest and finds seven dwarves, she eats a poisoned apple, the prince kisses her, they wake up, and happily ever after. 

You can't help but be skeptical of the situation, especially coming from a world where there is no such thing as magic. 

But...

Seeing the disheartened faces of Neige's roommates made your heart sink. Those boys all cared so deeply for their friend, and were so worried when they heard what had happened. You remember Dominic asking if there was anything you could do, hinting at the true love's kiss once more.

You take a breath and lean in, pressing a chaste kiss to his lips before slowly peeling back, watching his dark eyelashes flutter as he lets out something that sounds akin to a whimper from the back of his throat. He gasps, deep brown eyes meeting yours and lighting up as he smiles softly, raising a hand to cup your face. You hold your hand over his own before both of your phone begin buzzing incessantly, making you both jump and breaking you out of the moment. 

There you see it. A screenshot of a livestream of one of the nurses raving about Neige LeBlanche being in her hospital. And in the background...

You, very clearly, kissing him awake. 

You sigh as Neige giggles. 

"At least we don't have to worry about telling anyone!"

And so your fanbase grew.

[loveylangdon]

If You Don’t I Will

Word count: 3.3k

JJ Maybank x Reader : showing jj subtle ways of how you care for him and John B is tired of him not seeing it

A/N: I wrote another JJ thing bc im a simp and I love him and this was also another idea thats been floating around. Fluff is you squint but you dont need to squint hard, next will def be angst bc I live for it Xx

 masterlist

*not my gif full credit to owner*

“Hey” you let out as you carry 2 bags of groceries into the cheateu seeing the boys lounging on the couch gathered around John B’s phone you hear a chorus of “hey’s” as you move towards the kitchen. John B looks up and hands his phone to JJ making his way out the front door sending you a wink. Rolling your eyes you follow John B outside to your car. 

“You didn’t have to,” John B says smiling at you grabbing a grocery bag from your trunk shooting you a look 

“I have no idea what you’re talking about” you smile innocently to him and make your way over to grab the last grocery bag. You reach past John B until you feel his arm wrap over your shoulder, putting his grocery bag down he wraps his other arm around your shoulder engulfing you in a full hug laying his cheek at the top of your head. You wrap your arms around his torso and give him a squeeze 

“Thank you really” he lets out into your hair. You just give him a hug, you haven’t known them for long but John B automatically became like your brother and JJ was definitely your confidant. When you heard about Big John and Uncle T leaving John B by himself, your heart broke. John B had to support himself and apparently JJ was a constant resident in the chateau and it got harder to support themselves even if they both pitched in. When you found out always being smart with your money you set some aside to help supply the chateau so the boys wouldn’t starve.

JJ broke down one night during a late night smoke sesh you two had to get away from everything. He ended up telling you about his dad and mom in its entirety. After that you guys were kind of inseparable.You told him about why you had to move to OBX and he told you where his bruises and split knuckles came from. You never would’ve guessed one of the most caring people you knew would have to go through that. After that you subtly did more little things that hopefully made it easier on him. 

When you joined the Pogues you fell for his blue eyes and wild personality instantly his careless but protective nature made you fall hard but there was the rule. No Pogue on Pogue macking. Still fairly new to obx barely being here for a year you didn’t know how real the rule was. Being extra nice to JJ consisted of bringing extra of his favorite beer or asking him to buy you joints even though you didn’t smoke often, you would let him keep them, noticing his favorite snacks and bringing them on boat trips. Kie gladly gave up the title of caretaker and let you take over the snacks and picnics for day trips. After JJ told you his secret he made it clear that he didn’t take pity or handouts, you didn’t pity JJ you loved him and just wanted to make sure he knew it. 

So you helped JJ whenever you could making it seem like you were doing it by pure coincidence, knowing that he lived with John B you helped out the house, in general, to make it less obvious. Claiming you all spent so much time there any way it wasn’t fair to not help stock the necessities. 

Breaking away from your thoughts “I’m here for you guys always” you squeeze John B once more after you feel him loosening his grip “Let’s go I got ice cream” as John B fist bumps you snort “Oh I also got a better first aid kit” handing John B the second bag you move to the passenger side of the car. Hearing John B go back into the house you grab the first aid kit and hear footsteps as you open the back seat door to grab blankets. 

“What are the blankets for,” JJ asks questionably moving over to you to help grab some and you see him eye the first aid kit before you tuck it into a blanket

“For movie night. You can’t have a horror movie night without tons of blankets JJ it’s like against the rules” You quickly come up with the excuse. In all honesty it was starting to get colder and knowing the Chateau has minimal heating capacity you were going to accidentally leave them in the house and let the boys use them. The last time you were here late you asked JJ to borrow a sweater or a blanket and he gave you the one he was wearing and soon realized it was probably the only one you’ve seen him wear ever. Noticing Kie always brought her own blanket you assumed they were more supplied for the warmer days. John B was a big boy he would ask for help when he needed it JJ, on the other hand, was stubborn as hell and would rather freeze then ask for anything to help. 

“Okay” JJ says questionably not believing you entirely but not questioning it further “Are you staying tonight?” He asks you can see a glimmer of hope in his ocean eyes as he leans against the car door

“Yeah I think so” you smile and nod at him closing the car up “Are you?”

“No I’m just asking you so you can share my bed with Kie” he deadpans and your cheeks flush 

“Sorry” you squint up at him and you see him smile his “sharky smile” “Are Pope and Kie staying too?” 

“I think so” he nods at you biting his lip and you know he wants to add something but doesn’t

“Can I share a bed with you?” You ask assuming that’s what he wanted to ask “if I have to share a room with both Pope and Kie I might jump off the end of the dock, plus I got those joints still and extra snacks” you chuckle out trying to bribe him like you even have to. You see relief and a cute smile grace his features and you know that’s what he was trying to ask without even asking 

“Yeah you can crash with me, I like you the most anyways” he winks at you and nods towards the house “Have you eaten yet?” He asks you softly as you walk up the driveway “Pope and John B went to help Heyward earlier while I went to work and apparently they ate already” JJ trails off and you frown knowing there hasn’t been food at the chateau in a couple of days and John B has been incognito

“I can make us food,” you say and he perks up “I haven’t eaten yet” you continue which is a lie but he doesn’t need to know that “I bought stuff to make that shrimp thing you were talking about the other day” and you see his face light up as you walk into the house you smile at him and you can see pink dust his cheeks at the fact you remembered that small detail. He puts the blankets down taking the ones in your hands as well and wraps you in a hug carrying you to the kitchen leaving you in a fit of laughter. You see Pope peek his head out over the freezer with raised eyebrows 

“What are you doing,” he asks confused as to why you’re wrapped in JJs arms 

“Get out Pope y/n is making our food” he throws a look at Pope as he sets you down making Pope return a hurt one 

“You guys suck” he huffs out going back into the living room 

JJ sits on the counter as you start to pull out ingredients to make his food, John B put the groceries away thankfully and you hum to a random tune 

“Thank you” JJ lets out in almost a whisper and you look up at him and see he’s playing with the rings on his fingers a nervous habit he has while looking at his lap not making eye contact 

“For what” you feign innocence even though his small thank you made your heart flutter knowing your efforts and little signs of affection didn’t go unnoticed by the blonde boy. Moving to the stove to heat it up JJ finally looks at you and he shrugs his shoulders softly before twiddling his thumbs in his lap

“For taking the time to care about me” he shrugs again like he’s not worth the effort, you go to say something and he cuts you off looking at you with his ocean eyes making you forget how to breathe for a second, sincerity is swimming through them and you can’t help the butterflies in your stomach “I know you had dinner with Kie already. She told me you guys were gonna eat at The Wreck during her break if I wanted to pass by before you went to run errands which I’m assuming was getting food for here” your face flushes at being caught lying about dinner “I also saw the first aid kit you bought, and Its a nice one. I almost stole one just like it from the pharmacy a while back and I know John B doesn’t need one that good” he goes back to looking at his thumbs “And I know the blankets aren’t just for the movie night” He shoots you a knowing look causing you to blush and smile at him, taking a moment in the comforting silence you assume the boys are outside messing around 

Humming you smile giddily not confirming or denying “Okay I’m gonna make you food now go away” you joke shooing him out of the kitchen 

He gasps in shock “You wound me” he clutches his chest with both his hands and falls back against the cabinets “Treating me how I treat Pope now that’s cold” He gets off of the counter still clutching his chest moving closer towards you 

“Leave” you squeal at him as he traps you in between his arms and the sink, he leans in and you think he’s going to finally kiss you, heart beating so fast you think he could hear it if he got any closer. His eyes flicker to your lips and back to your eyes as he licks his lips your breath hitches in your throat, he leans down to place a kiss on your cheek leaving the kitchen and going outside. Watching him retreat you finally let out a breath you didn’t know you were holding in. “Jesus Christ” you huff and go back to making his food with a big smile on your face 

____

“Holy shit” JJ practically moans at the smell coming in from the kitchen “I can’t even think of the last home cooked meal I’ve had what about you John B” You hear JJ ask as him as they walk back into the Chateau,

“Uh I think-” John B starts but is cut off by JJ 

“That was rhetorical bro shut up” you hear them walk into the living room and see them come into the kitchen “we know you have a secret kook family chill” JJ lets out referring to the fact that John B disappears some nights and during the day and no one knows why. Causing a laugh to come from you and a scoff from John B

“That smells delicious y/n” John B lets out which earns a mean look from JJ 

“You can’t have any” JJ says defensively “she made it for me and her you guys are all traitors eating without us” JJ winks at you “what happened to Pogues together for life” JJ adds pointing a finger at John B as you try to stifle a laugh grabbing plates 

John B looks at JJ with the most unamused look you’ve ever seen which causes a burst of laughter from you. Catching John B’s attention he gives you a look as if asking if JJ is serious, you shrug your shoulders as John B scoffs “I welcome you into my home JJ and this is how you repay me” He tsks opening a beer for you and placing it on the counter by your plates, he gives you a side hug and places a kiss on your forehead before retreating outside to help Pope and Kie with a projector she found in her garage. As he walks through the living room you hear “Eat your food dumbass, and if you don’t marry her I will” John B shouts out and you immediately turn to look at John B who has his beer raised in the air “Salud” and he walks out of the Cheateu. 

Turning to JJ his face is beat red and you let out a small laugh as JJ groans mumbling something about murdering John B “Here eat tough guy I’m gonna grab blankets for outside” you say as you place a plate in front of JJ. You’re about to walk into John B’s room when you feel JJ grab your hand 

“Stay please” he lets out a smile while tugging on your wrist gently patting the spot next to him, you can tell he wants to say something again but you can’t tell what its gonna be because he’s looking down at his plate of food. Your foot starts tapping the floor a nervous tick you have when you can’t tell how something is gonna play out. His head snaps to your knee placing his hand there gently to stop it and he looks up at you “Don’t do that, not around me” he lets out looking at you 

“wha-”

“You do that when your nervous or unsure of a situation” he squeezes your knee in a comforting motion giving you a small smile at your confused expression, “You think you’re the only one who notices things around here” he shoots you a look and his eyes go wide trying to cover up his confession with a chuckle 

“Do you JJ Maybank have feelings for little old me” you shoot him an amused look with a gasp. He opens his mouth to say something but nothing comes out and he looks at you sheepishly rubbing the back of his neck while pink tints his cheeks 

“Hey, Lovebirds we got the movie set up come on” you hear John B yell from outside. You move to get up and JJ stops you looking up at you with a look of concentration before he exhales

“I like you y/n a lot actually and it’s scaring me. I’m not gonna lie to you. I’m not used to this or feeling wanted, hell even wanting to be around one person constantly is new for me. You are this incredible person who came out of fucking nowhere and the first thing you did was make sure everyone is taken care of. I didn’t even notice what you would do for me at first because I was so angry at everything. John B pointed it out to me when we found more of my favorite snacks in the cupboard than his” he let out a chuckle and you did too “He told me to stop being stupid and I realized then all the small things you would do for me like when I wouldn’t eat with you guys you brought food, or extra snacks on boat trips when you knew I was going home after, you and Kie would go shopping and you literally got me a hoodie because you told me it reminded you of me. No one has cared about me in the way you have and I’m so sorry for not realizing it sooner” you squeeze his hand gently reassuring him noticing his voice waiver “you’re so strong and stubborn but god if it didn’t make me fall for you harder, and I wasn’t gonna say anything because there is no way in hell that I’m good enough for you, I mean seriously I don’t know what you see-” cutting him off you place a kiss to his lips to shut him up, he places his hand on the side of your neck holding your jaw melting into the kiss. This is what heaven feels like you think. This blonde haired blue eyed prince. JJ breaks apart and rests his forehead against yours smiling like an idiot 

“I like you a lot actually too, if you couldn’t tell” you whisper out causing him to let out a laugh placing a chaste kiss to your lips, pulling you into his lap, your back to his chest as he nuzzles into the crook of your neck before you move to face him “Oh” you let out and he looks confused, you shoot him a look and he smirks. Hitting his chest playfully “get your head out of the gutter” 

“I know exactly where I would like my head to be” he smirks placing a kiss to your pulse. Rolling your eyes at him you start off “If I hear you talk bad about yourself I will fight you Maybank do you hear me” you look at him knowingly and he raised his eyebrows as if telling you to proceed “That is a fight you will lose every time. I can promise you,” you look at him softly “you deserve the world and all the love that comes with it, you care so much about your friends you’re willing to do anything to protect them literally anything” emphasizing the literally he lets out a chuckle “You are so kind, generous always giving even when you don’t have much yourself that’s what I love about you. There is more good than what you define yourself as and if you have doubts I will be more than glad to fight them with you” you let out rubbing your thumb on his cheek which he nuzzles into until he crashes his lips into yours again. 

“I thought you were eating, you haven’t even started are you kidding? YOU GUYS ARE MACKING we’ve been waiting for like 10 minutes” John B lets out from the doorway of the house raising his arms in a what the fuck motion, causing you both to laugh “J I’m proud of you for finally telling her, but Jesus come on guys the foods all cold, we don’t even have snacks because you’re distracting y/n, we’re dying out here” he fake whines 

“Sorry John B” you let out a smile knowing you usually prepare the snacks for movie nights but got distracted

“My girlfriend is not your Slave John B get your own snacks” JJ jokes holding onto you tighter

“Says the guy she made dinner for but hasn’t even touched it yet!” John B says dramatically “honestly the disrespect happening in this house, everything is all out of wack,” John B says going to the fridge and grabbing a case of beer and candy making his way back outside before he turns around heading back to you and JJ “Actually,” he says out loud before taking JJ’s plate with food taking a bite and moaning at the taste John B continues “I’m serious y/n if he doesn’t marry you I will” he gets out with a mouth full of food, moving slightly to avoid JJ arms that are trying to swat him for taking his food. John B walks out of the house leaving you two alone again 

“I’ll get you another plate, grab the blankets?” you ask chuckling as you move to get JJ another plate of food but he stops you. 

Taking his pinky ring off his finger he places it on your fingers trying to find the best fit, finally, it fits on your middle finger, a little loose but not by much, he chuckles “maybe I’ll get you a chain for it” he states chuckling he kisses your knuckles when he’s done “Not an engagement ring but a temporary promise ring until we get you a real one so John B can stop trying to steal you from me.”

“I think its perfect” He smiles bright placing a kiss on your lips and you know that this is exactly where you’re supposed to be

________

A/N: so I wrote another jj thing bc who is not a whore for jj especially soft jj. Roughly edited but not really, this has been floating in my head for a while so feedback and commentary is again always welcome my inbox is always open I hope you enjoyed this as much as I did Xx 

[heyitsyn]

Keeping Up With Seijoh Ep. 1

a/n: this is a mini-series that are based off of your asks and once i,,,,, finish,,,, my seijoh phase, i will also do this for the other schools but pls take these offerings in the meantime as i work on the next part of my manager!seijoh and the time traveler au 

for more seijoh content, check this masterlist out!

anon request: 

Wow, your series of Seijoh managers is so cute.🥺👉👈 After starting to read, I can only think about Oikawa and y / n on a Saturday night seeing mean girls, painting nails, taking care of the skin and the another day Oiks rubbing the face of everyone who spends much more time with his dear businessman LMAOO Anyway, congratulations on your work 💕💕 seriously, I LOVE this series omg-

I MIGHT BE AN IWA AND KYO STAN BUT OIKS IS DEFINITELY THE MOST BEAUTIFUL AND PRETTIEST DUMPSTER IVE EVER SEEN

yep lets start the pilot

so basically, oikawa was being oikawa again

what might i mean, you ask

well, he was starting to work much harder than before since this was his last ever inter-high and his last ever chance on beating ushiwaka 

even though they finally have the team assembled avengers assemble! with kyo back on the team, he still felt lacking and wanted to use every single free time to work on becoming better

yall fun fact about me, oikawa is actually my favorite character bc of how hard he works and the pain i have in that once scene during the karasuno match when he slammed into the tables and was struggling to get up bc of his knee----NO IM SOBBING AGAIN

iwa noticed him doing this again so he sent you out to drag him out and distract him from this 

‘cmon oikawa-san-’

‘NO, Y/N-CHAN! I HAVE TO-’

‘no, the only thing you have to do is spend time with me bc i miss you and i want to have that movie you kept talking about’

bahahaha he is so whipped that a single ‘i miss you’ from you will literally make him break his back and bend for you

it was successful and you were in your room, your parents understanding oikawa and his antics since youve complained about it before, and he was sitting on your floor while looking through movies

‘y/n-chan, do you have no alien movies in here? or barbie?’

IN MY CONTENT, IT IS CANON THAT OIKAWA LOVES THE BARBIE MOVIES FITE ME

you laughed from your spot on your bed and shook your head

‘no, oikawa-san. natsu took all my barbie movies and i get scared of alien movies’

he pouted but continued to look until his eyes literally lit up

it was like god took a picture of him and you saw the flash

‘MEAN GIRLS! Y/N-CHAN I DIDNT KNOW YOU LIKED THIS TYPE OF MOVIE!’

he shrieked but you shrugged

‘meh. katsuki, natsu’s boyfriend, gave it to natsu as a joke but he gave it to me instead bc he cannot stand regina george’

you reasoned while picking out nail polish colors and looking through the ingredients of your face masks

‘WE’RE WATCHING THIS! PERIODT!’

omg hes so loud but i am too so we compatible

ugh i hate my logic

then later,

as the movie played, you were arguing with oikawa as he refused to wear the unicorn and wanted the panda one, which was your favorite

‘OIKAWA-SAN, I LIKE THIS ONE!’

‘Y/N-CHAN I LIKE IT MORE!’

you sucked in a sharp breath before relenting bc you wanted oikawa to be relaxed per request of your beloved senpai

‘fine. but i get to paint your nails’

he nodded eagerly and you handed him the packet, to which he simply stared at it

‘y/n-chan, can you,,,, put it on me?’

he sheepishly asked and you gave him a confused and bewildered look

‘oikawa-san, have you never put these on yourself?’

he shook his head, cheeks flushing and eyes focusing on the blue blanket

‘my sister always put it on for me. or iwa-chan’

‘IWA-?! wHAT-?!’

but you nodded anyways and he made you sit on his lap to put it on

‘um, oikawa-san, this position-’

he smiled at you, a gentle and real smile, not the ones for his fangirls

‘nuh uh, its fine, y/n-chan. oikawa-san loves you so he likes you right here’

he mumbled, blushing and wrapping his arms around your waist to pull you closer making you giggle and nod

‘okay. close your eyes then, oikawa-san’

he excitedly nodded, expecting a kiss from you but you flicked his forehead making his eyes fly open and wince at the pain

‘so perverted, oikawa-san. pervert-oikawa-san’

you scolded and he pouted

he said something but you didnt listen, instead placing the mask on his face and smoothing it out

his fringe was about to touch the wet material so you hastily grabbed a clip and held his hair up

he looked so cute that you couldnt help but reach over and snap a picture of him

‘ara ara gomen did y/n-chan just take a picture of oikawa-san?’

he teased but you shook your head

‘no. what are you talking about?’

he did the same thing to you and now you were both painting each other’s nails, ofc staying loyal to your school mint green and baby blue on the ring fingernail

lmao dont blast me for not being exact w the school colors but it looks mint green to me

he finished yours first and omg?? hes so??? good?? like what???

you were holding his large hands with your small fingers and his heart started thumping really fast at the simple touch 

‘thank you,,,,, y/n-chan’

you looked up to him with large eyes, still unfamiliar with the softness of his voice

it was such a contrast compared to his usually loud and obnoxious, mocking tone

‘oikawa-san is not a really good captain since he burdens and bothers everyone but you always fix it all and keep everyone together. so, sorry for everything’

he mumbled and the eye holes from the mask let you see his sad eyes, genuinely sad about himself

you made the last paint stroke and capped the nail polish before leaning forwards, hands on his thigh so you could be closer

oikawa ofc freaked out because wow youre so much prettier up close and he doesnt?? deserve you??

your eyes blazed with anger and he stuttered your name but you cut him off

‘OIKAWA-SAN IS NOT USELESS. HE IS A REALLY GOOD CAPTAIN WHO LED HIS TEAM TO BATTLE THE ULTIMATE RIVAL AND EVEN THOUGH THEY LOST, THEY STILL WON IN MY EYES. YOU GOT KENTA-KUN TO COME BACK EVEN THOUGH HE DIDNT WANT TO BUT HE DID BC HE KNOWS HOW GOOD YOU ARE. HE WANTS TO PLAY ALONGSIDE A PLAYER WHO DESERVES TO BE ON THE COURT AND EVERYONE ELSE THINKS THE SAME THING. ME, Y/N, IS JUST A MANAGER WHO MIGHT NOT KNOW EVERYTHING ABOUT VOLLEYBALL OR THE TECHNIQUES AND ALL THAT BUT I RECOGNIZE YOUR TALENT AND YOU WILL MAKE IT BIG SOMEDAY, OIKAWA-SAN! I PROMISE! AND WHEN YOU DO, I WILL SUPPORT YOU AND COME TO YOUR GAMES BC YOU ARE MY CAPTAIN AND I DONT REGRET EVER MEETING YOU. SO DONT APOLOGIZE AND SAY SORRY TO ME, INSTEAD TELL ME YOU ARE HAPPY TO BE IN THIS TEAM AND SAY YOU LOVE THE TEAM AND YOU LOVE VOLLEYBALL AND YOU LOVE-’

but he cut you off, placing a chaste kiss on your exposed nose

yall really thought it was the,,,, speaking function part of your face

nahnahnah that is only for the doggie

oop what

 you stopped, flustered at the sudden action but oikawa smiled

‘i love you, y/n. i really love you so give me a chance, okay? i will wait, no matter how long it takes but,,,, let me catch up and for now, think about me, okay?’

BRUH HOW IS THAT RELEVANT TO HER LONG RANT LIKE WHAT---

you tilted your head to the side, confused

she is deadass naive like bls protect her

‘a chance for what? you want to catch up for what? youre already good, oikawa-san’

then he laughed

so much more different than the ones he let out in public

it was so,,,, beautiful

you found yourself grinning with him and he calmed down, brushing away the stray hairs that is in danger of getting stuck on your mask

‘come on, y/n-chan. lets go take this off’

he stood up and offered his hand which you took

after the moisturizing and final touch-ups for your skin, you finally settled on the blanket fort and dozed off, the movie still playing but you were too comfortable in oikawa’s arms that you didnt even notice the credits rolling

the next day, you didnt feel the need to mention it at all

but oikawa did and it was still truly an accident

iwa heard about him staying late again and you having to drag him out of there and he was hitting him and kicking him again

you were so used to this that you were just writing down your notes at the corner, oblivious to oikawa’s crying

finally, he had enough of it

‘SEE THIS IS WHY Y/N-CHAN DOESNT LET YOU SPEND THE NIGHT WITH HER! BECAUSE YOU ARE SO MEAN!’

um, sire what did you just say

that was completely taken out of context and everyone, omg, especially iwa and kyo just froze

‘what,,, did you just say?’

iwa asked in a dangerously low voice and you shrugged

‘you told me to distract him, iwa-san, so i did. he was happy and satisfied and thats all that matters, right?’

you shot them a smile and oiks had such a smug smile when iwa looked at him and he was about to hit him when kyo just came out of nowhere and YEETED the smile off of his face

oikawa screamed

just a wittle blurb about this bc i totally love this :( and he totally needs more love and some of my readers love oikawa and want oikawa manager content so here it is!!! feast on these crumbs!!!!

[25ana]

Some random harm reduction tips bc my nap failed

-lol ironically sleep more. Since you’re getting less nutrients you gotta prioritize that to conserve energy. Start a nighttime routine, it’ll also be a nice form of self care bc we need all we can get.

-if you have meds that require you to eat, find a safe food and take them with that.

-don’t take laxative pills I’ve talked about this before. I prefer senna tea if I’m really constipated but be careful with that too.

-watch caffeine intake.

-electroytes. Gatorade zero, electrolyte sticks, or even just some Himalayan sea salt in water with lemon. Salt is important

-vitamins. I’m getting athletic greens bc it’s low cal and got great ingredients. If you can’t spend that, take a multivitamin, or when you do eat make sure you choose nutrient dense foods

-have a metabolism day when you plateau or schedule them biweekly. My plan is in about two weeks to eat at the maintenance cals for my gw

-vary fasting hours for metabolism purposes. Your body will get used to doing only one thing

-maintain some type of connection with food so when you recover it’s easier to bridge that gap

-get help if you can and get out

-work out in the way you like to. I’ve talked about this before, but like the best exercise is the one you’ll do. Also this keeps a somewhat healthier perspective with exercise.

-weight fluctuates daily. If you have a period, binge, drink or whatever don’t freak, it’ll go away in a few days. Literally sleep can affect this too (another reason why sleep is important)

-I know some people are like be cold it burns calories but goddam wear a jacket in winter for gods sake or if you’re cold at work or school. Take cold showers in the morning if you want, this is plenty

-do research.

-try to find something you enjoy that doesn’t have to with any of this. Reading, video games, writing, drawing painting, instruments, Netflix (NOT WATCHING TRIGGERING THINGS LMAO). I know it’s exercise but I like yoga bc my brain can turn off for an hour

I also like reading and watching Netflix lol, or trying to find the best americano in the city 😂😂😂

-if fasting makes you binge then just don’t do it. It typically will after a while bc your body gets convinced it has to eat everything right away bc it doesn’t know it’ll get food again

-if you like milk or creamer in your coffee or tea then just have it. It may help you not binge later

-DONT START PURGING but if you already do, make sure you’re getting electrolytes. Drink throat coat tea and add some honey. You need something to soothe your throat.

-when eating out or at social events plan ahead so you’re not freaking out. I have a list somewhere of fast food safe foods I’ll post soon.

You may not be able to get calorie counts all the time so just eat the thing. It’ll likely prevent a solo binge later

-fermented foods are good for your gut: sauerkraut and kimchi are my favorites, and most are low calorie, but if you don’t like them take a probiotic.

That’s all folks

[soulwillower]

kool aid • richie tozier

(richie tozier x reader smut)   

requested: some daddy kink richie? 😳    +    okay, wait, but- richie with a daddy kink, i-  +  hi, can you do a daddy kink richie smut please! i love your stuff, it’s so good!

warnings: swearing, smut, oral sex (male receiving), daddy kink, dirty talk bc its richie, degradation, use of the word slut like once, shower sex, unedited

[losers + reader are 18+]

2.8k words

♡

in your defense, richie did this to himself and you. he was the one who had started this whole thing, who had planted that fucking seed in your head and unintentionally nurtured it until it sprouted into a full-grown desire.

the first time was so, so innocent. it meant less than nothing, and yet it threw you for a full 180.

you were at dinner with the losers and you and bill hadn't had enough money to get anything to eat. richie had insisted that the two of you both get anything you wanted. “daddy’s paying tonight.” he’d said with a smirk and a wink directed at you and bill. the two of you had groaned and thrown balled up paper napkins at him but he’d just laughed. you’d hoped your face wasn’t nearly as red as you felt it was, because that would certainly give yourself away. he can’t know how hot you thought richie calling himself daddy was. and he’d been doing it ever since. 

you’re still thinking about that day when your front door opens suddenly, making you bound over to the balcony on your stairs.

"y/n?" richie calls into the empty foyer of your house, making you chuckle from your spot on the banister. he looks up to where you stand and shoots you a grin as he toes off his shoes, gesturing around him. 

"am i supposed to be impressed that you’re here?" you ask teasingly, lifting a brow. he just shrugs, gesturing instead to himself as he walks up the stairs slowly towards you. "daddy's home. you're not excited to see me?"

you have to stifle your breath hitch by covering it up with a laugh. "not enough to warrant whatever it is you're thinking. this isn't even your home, trashmouth." you state, swallowing down your flustered cheeks with an eye roll and grin, ignoring the butterflies as his fingers graze your arms sweetly.

whatever you expect to come out if his mouth next, its not what he says. “y/n, can we make some cake?”

you blink at richie in confusion. “why would we do that? i know exactly how that would go down, rich.” you say with a playful glare as you pass him, walking down the stairs and maintaining eye contact with the boy. you both know you cant say no to him.

“what ever do you mean?” he says in a high, lilted voice. the slight british twinge makes you huff a laugh as you walk into the kitchen, pulling ingredients out while richie grabs a full pitcher of koolaid from your fridge and then sits on your counter.

“look at you, you’re useless.” you mutter, gesturing to him.

“mm, i’m not useless, sugar. i got this mouth. im keeping you company, am i not?” he reasons as you measure out the flour into the mixing bowl.

“well your dumb mouth is useless. fuck you and your trash mouth. i dont know why i’m doing this for you.”

your words are enough for him to slide off the counter and saunter closer to you. you try not to heat up under his gaze. “why dont i help, then?” he says sarcastically. you shake your head, eyeing him like you’re sizing him up.

“no, i change my mind. you’ll just fuck it up.” you stick out your tongue after and it makes him smirk, reaching for the bowl and tossing a pinch of flour at him.

he sputters as he watches you in annoyance and a grin. “oh, you’ve done it.” he mutters. your hands both shoot out to grab the bowl of flour and you struggle a bit, watching each other with determined eyes. 

it doesnt last very long though as he gets a better grip. he drops it on the counter though, and you only have a second to watch as his hand shoots out to grab the pitcher.

and then, he tosses the kool aid at you. you feel like you’ve been hit with the worlds most room-temperature wave of sugary water and you almost scream. “richie!” you hiss as you stare at him in disbelief, bright red and sugary drink coating your face and body. you can feel the liquid inside your shirt and he laughs loudly. you want to punch him.

“you’re fine. look, go take a shower. im sorry.” he says through a grin, grabbing you to bring you up to your shower. you push him, angry. “baby, come on. daddy’s sorry.” he says with a laugh.

your cheeks glow as you glare at him, letting him drag you upstairs, “i’m not your baby, rich.”

he just smirks to himself.

you’re still holding the half-full kool aid pitcher as you stand in your bathroom, richie watching you expectantly. “richie what are you going to do while i’m showering?” you ask him, your eyes watching yourself strain the kool-aid off your hair and into the sink.

“i’ll just stay in here.” he says, wiggling his eyebrows. you snap, grabbing the pitcher and tossing its contents up at him. he screeches like a child upon impact and stares at you, disbelieving, afterwards.

“y/n!” he says, mad. his eyebrows are furrowed, cheeks puffing out as sticky red kool aid sifts from the top of his dark curls.

“what? at least you wore contacts today, so you’re welcome.” you say with a cocky smile, happy that he’s riled up. he shakes his head, not even sure what you mean. “fine, you’re the worst. i’m showering, then.” he mutters, making a start for the tub.

“no!” you yelp, grabbing him by the collar of his shirt and making him glare at you as the two of you wrestle for the shower handle. “it’s my house, richie!” “well you’re being quite a shitty host, toots.” he mutters as you fumble around each other. “this is your fault, rich! you’re such a fucking brat.”

then suddenly, you’re being slammed up against the wall and held by your hip and shoulder, richie’s face inches from you.

your stomach dips and sways as his breath hits your lips. he chuckles lightly, “i’m the brat?” he asks. “are you joking, y/n/n?” he asks, but you’re breathless. you cant tear your eyes from his lips and you dont want to admit to him that you’re brattier than him, so you instead thrust your hips forward slowly.

as your hips line with his, you feel his hardening cock against you and you bite back a whimper. his hands grab your hips as he watches you.

you do it again, seeing how much he likes it and desperate to feel him against you. “what’re you doing, princess?” he mutters lowly. you grin up at him, “nothing.”

and then his lips are on yours, kissing you fiercely. your hands grab him and pull him closer, his squeezing your hips before roaming. his tongue tastes like cherry kool aid as he licks into your mouth. he pulls back, “take off your clothes.” he orders, making your eyes widen at the dominance. you listen to him though, pulling off your shirt, watching him as he stares at you hungrily.

after you’re left in your underwear, you bite your lip and stare up at him. he turns on the shower and shucks off his shirt, watching you expectantly. “i thought i told you to take off your clothes, baby.” he whispers, pinching a lock of your hair between his thumb and forefinger. your stomach erupts, shocked at how your best friend is acting. 

you blush, unclipping your bra and watching as richie stares. you slowly slip off your underwear until you’re naked and he smiles. “good girl. you’re so pretty.” he mutters, kissing you and squeezing your ass. you whimper, feeling yourself slick your thighs with desire.

“get in.” he says, opening the curtain. you watch him with wide eyes as you step into the shower. is he not going to come in with you?

“are you coming too?” you ask meekly as you let the water rinse over your body. he chuckles as he steps in, making you smile in embarrassment with red cheeks. “so needy, arent you?” he asks with a grin, pulling you towards him. your eyes glance over his naked body and your stomach erupts in butterflies again. his cock is hard and up against his stomach and you squeeze your thighs together because he’s much bigger than you’d anticipated. his hands circle your bare waist as he steps under the stream of water with you. “its okay, baby. you’re getting your shower.” he mutters.

and he kisses you again, taking your breath away. he gently pushes you against the tile, the coldness making your hips jolt, consequently rubbing up against richie’s thigh. you whine into his mouth and he pulls away with a dark smirk that makes you shiver with lust. he guides your hips against his thigh again and his bare, wet skin against your throbbing clit makes you cry out.

he starts to kiss up and down your neck, sucking marks and making you moan. his hands tighten around your hips and move you quicker against him.

"fuck, daddy." 

it slips from your lips quicker than you even think (or don't think) it, and suddenly richie's hands on your hip halt their movement. "what'd you just say, princess?" he mutters lowly, not sounding quite amused but more smug and teasing  than you'd like.

his lips suck on the crook between your neck and shoulder and he gives you a gentle squeeze as the warm water cascades over your bodies. you sigh, cheeks bright red.

when you dont say anything, he looks up and grabs your jaw, rising to his full height in front of you. his eyes are hooded. “say it again.” he snaps lowly and you have to clench your thighs in order to relieve the desire pooling in your underwear.

you smile though, watching as water streams down his skin and you wonder if he’ll do this the way you will.

“say what, daddy?” you say, tracing a finger over his chest. the groan he lets out is holy as he catches your lips with his, pushing you against the tile again.

his hands ghost over your tits before squeezing, rolling your nipples between his fingers and making you whimper into his mouth.

“so needy for daddy’s cock, aren’t you?” he says with a smug grin, pushing your wet hair out of your face. you nod with your lip caught between your teeth. you want him so bad.

his eyes swim with something as you reach out, grabbing his hard cock as it lay against his stomach.

his eyes shut in pleasure but his hand quickly halts you as move to get onto your knees. his eyes are dark. “not today. if you don’t ask, you don’t get it.” he says and that makes you impossibly wetter at being under his control. 

“for that, daddy’s gonna fuck you until you scream.” he mutters, fingers ghosting down your wet body to flutter over your aching core. you whine. 

slowly, he rubs circles on your clit as he holds your chin with the other hand. “eyes on me, princess.”

he rubs slowly, the water spraying down on your bodies. he chuckles lightly. “look at you, i've only started using my fingers and you're already shaking." and he’s right, youre shaking and whimpering as pleasure spreads through your whole body. “god, look at you, so ready for daddy’s cock, rutting against me.” he mutters as you buck your hips on his hand.

you whimper out a weak “daddy,” as he slips a finger in and immediately sets a pace, curling his fingers slightly. he watches you with a smirk as you fight not to close your eyes in bliss.

when he adds another finger you gasp, the feeling of his fingers pumping into you making your legs weak. you briefly wonder if your legs are going to collapse. “you look good taking my fingers, baby. you gonna take my cock this well?”

you whimper, bucking into his fingers to relieve the coil tightening in your stomach. “yes, daddy. please, please fuck me.” you whimper, moaning as he pulls his fingers out of you and starts to pump himself.

“look at what happens when you ask like a good girl.” he mutters, lifting your leg to his hip, gripping his cock and teasing you, resting at your entrance.

“what do you want?” he asks, grinning. you want to glare at him but you’re so desperate to feel him that you sigh, muttering, “please, i want your cock inside me.”

and he pushes in at your words slowly, making you mewl. he’s halfway in when he stops, kissing you to give you time to adjust. “let daddy take care of you, okay?” he whispers in your ear and you nod, starting to move your hips, wanting more.

he slides the rest of the way in and you feel full and your toes curl as you look down, watching as he thrusts back and into you, setting a pace. “daddy, fuck,” is all that you can say as he thrusts into you, water cascading down your bodies and making you groan.

“harder.” you whimper suddenly, hands gripping his shoulders. “please, daddy, harder.” you beg. he smirks at you, kissing your lips. he tastes like kool-aid.

“love it when you beg for me like a desperate slut. you want to go harder? i’ll go harder.” he mutters, making you clench around him, nearing your high. he pulls your other leg up so he’s holding you and then he slams into you relentlessly, hitting spots deeper inside you than you knew was possible. he puts a hand on your stomach and he smirks as he fucks you into the shower tiles. “look so good with me deep inside you.” he mutters as you cling onto him.

“good girl, taking my cock. do you like me splitting you in half, baby? does it feel good?” he asks, hitting deep inside you and making your legs shake.

“yes, yes, yes,” is all that leaves your lips, your eyes scrunched up. “daddy, i’m so close. can-can i please-“

“no, you’re not cumming yet. not until i say so.” he says, slapping your ass. you squeal and drop your head onto his shoulder, trying your hardest to hold off as he fills you, his thick cock stretching your walls.

hes slamming into you so hard and hitting your spot perfectly that you rake your nails over his back, making him hiss in pleasure. after another minute, you’re whimpering and muttering nonsense, trying your hardest to wait for richie to let you cum.

“cum all over daddy’s cock.” he mutters as he fucks you into the tiles and you let out a loud moan as you clench around him, hitting your high and shaking in pleasure. your eyes roll back lightly as you hold onto him, already sensitive as you ride out the best orgasm you’ve ever had.

he keeps fucking you, his hands on your hips as you whimper. he mutters in your ear as he thrusts into you, “you’ve been a good girl for me. want me to fill you with my cum? or do you want to taste it?”

your eyes screw shut in pleasure and you whimper, “daddy, p-please let me taste you.”

and then he’s pulling out of you and making you gasp, still extremely sensitive. you slip immediately onto the bottom of the tub, knees shaky against it. you stare up at him as he pumps his thick cock, other hand opening your jaw. “let me see that pretty mouth, baby.” he mutters and you stick your tongue out, mouth open as you wait for him.

“please use me, daddy.” you mutter and thats all richie can take before he’s thrusting himself into your mouth, filling you up and immediately making you gag. 

your eyes well with tears as you stare up at him, his hips moving and fucking your mouth. he’s biting his lip in pleasure, the water slipping down his chest as it hits his back.

“can you taste yourself on daddy’s cock?” he asks and you moan around him, feeling his hips stutter. “fuck, such a good girl, takin' my cock so well.” you gag around him as you let him move against you and he grabs your head, making you moan again. “baby, fuck-“ he starts and then he’s spilling into your mouth ans you bob your head slowly, riding out his high and swallowing every drop.

you pull off him with a gasp and then you’re breathing heavily, richie pulling you up and into his arms. the water is pretty cold now and you shiver slightly as he pecks your forehead. “holy shit, doll.” he mutters and you let out a broken giggle, turning to kiss his lips. his hands soothe over your waist.

"maybe i should annoy you more often." you mutter into his lips as he chuckles, grabbing your shampoo. 

"you know, or just ask me, sugar." he mutters, massaging shampoo into your scalp. you smile, letting out a content sigh as your arms wrap around his middle.

[dreamychick]

Me and Tai have been Discussing Hogwarts again and were talking about classes. Obviously everyone would have their favorites and ones they'd be good at.

Charms would be my best and Favorite subject. It's mostly practical not theoretical. It's the most useful in everyday wizarding life. You learn a huge assortment of stuff from a knitting spell to a bubblehead charm. Like there are all different kinds of charms out there. And I feel like there's no end to what you can do. If something doesnt exist, you could make new charms and Prof. Flitwick would guide you along the way. He seems like one of the nicest teachers and most patient.

Even though I'd be a Muggle born coming into a world of Magic for the first time and I'd be excited for everything I'd probably hate HOM.Cuz like History of magic is taught by a guy who bored his own self to death. So thats probably a class id sleep through even if the subject matter were interesting. Goblin Rebellion sounds interesting as hell until you hear it being taught in a monotone voice and then you're suddenly being shaken awake and have a pool of drool on your face that you have to hastily wipe off bc it's time for the next class.

Divination is a wooly discipline. You have to have a given gift its not really something that can be taught. If you dont have an aptitude for it you cant hone anything. If you do have a gift for clairvoyance I think the class is a good one to take, it's not useless. Just useless to me. I'm not the sort who would have the sight. So prophecies and future and stuff is beyond me. So divination would be a waste of my time that I could spend doing something else.

Arithmancy is magic math who wants that?

Herbology is plants and I kill plants only these ones may try and kill me back. I think I'd find it interesting, I wouldn't be bored but I wouldn't retain it. It's used alot for potions ingredients. And I'd be fuckin useless at Potions.

Potions is cooking/science/math all in one. Anyone who has ever seen me try and do math or science knows I should not be allowed to create something that could potentially poison someone if done incorrectly. Also. Ive only been allowed to cook breakfast foods my whole life bc my sister runs the kitchen and doesn't let me try things so now I'm to lazy and don't want to. I cook rice in the microwave. It would be a miracle if I could scrape a passing grade for Potions at all.

Astronomy may be a good one. Staying up late. Learning the stars and the constellations. The placings. Charting and mapping. That would be helpful for adventuring, could navigate at night, by knowing where the stars are in relation to each other in terms of directions.

I feel like Id get super frustrated with Transfiguration bc id be over thinking it. To worried about the actual molecular structure of what im trying to transfigure. And stressing out cuz im not good at math and science. So i have no idea how to make it work. And when i do make it work its by dumb luck not bc i actually understand how im doing it. And when i TRY to understand it I just end up stressing out more bc i cant.

DADA I'd be good at. It's a practical class with practical application. Yes it requires some research for things like the creatures/beings you go up against, but once you've fought a Boggart you'll know how to fight it again. The situations may change but you'll know the spell. And it's something that requires action not as much sitting down and studying. My brain is broken. I need the classes I can move with.

Care of Magical Creatures I would love. New animals? Yes. Sign me up. I have 8 cats, 2 dogs and a turtle at home. But over my life we've had rabbits, lizards, hamsters, guinea pigs, fish, rats, birds and hermit crabs. I would love the hell out of new animals. My problem would be, like in the HP game now, I'd adopt these animals on the Reserve, take care of them and then it would be time for me to graduate and my ass would be like, "ok everyone into the magic bag, yup, yup once we get home Ill let you out. But come on, in you get." And Id take all of them.

Any muggle classes Id pass on, cuz I'm muggle born so that's a waste of time.

Ancient runes  is a book course. Like. All studying and memorization. Boring. I mean. It could be interesting I guess. But in the way that like studying Heiroglyphics is inyeresting. In that I think its interesting in theory. I think the subject matter is fascinating. Id love to learn more. But you put the book in front of me and my brain shuts off. I'm not gonna be able to focus on this man.

.....It has just come to my attention that in order to obtain my desired job of Curse-breaker I have to take

 Arithmancy and Ancient runes.

Well. Fuck me sideways.

I guess that makes sense, seeing as Curse breakers work for the banks most of the time but still. Can I be exempt seeing as how I'm a chosen one from Hogwarts? I've been finding Vaults and breaking curses for 6 years w/o this shit. May I be excused?

What do you mean no exceptions? But I have a recommendation from Bill Weasley! Plus! In a few years Harry Potter wont even Take his N.E.W.Ts but that bitch gets to be an Auror. Wtf.

Oooooh so you die ONE TIME for all of wizardom and you get a pass. Bitches.

Fine. Sign me up for both classes then.

I also MUST get an O on Transfigurations and Potions to get into the NEWT classes and an O or an E on Charms and DADA (The Classes Id probably pass with an O np) Luckily I only need to take the Arithmancy Owl no NEWT required. It doesnt say specifically if a NEWT is required for Ancient Runes. Or if Id need an O or E to get there. But lets hope I dont need it and that I can just take both with the OWLs and get an E. The NEWTS are Probably preferred but not necessary. So if I only just pass my OWL no biggie.

Someone better break out the Monsters and chocolate. And be ready to tutor the fuck out of me the week before exams to cram as much info into my head. Bc Im not retaining shit throughout the year.

[justsomefluff]

Okay this might be a lil weird but what about an ateez reaction to making frog bread together during quarentined :3

this is so cute, anon!! my friend made frog bread a couple weeks ago and it looked so good lmao

Also! None of the pictures of frog bread are mine, Google aided me on this one.

Hongjoong: 

He is gonna bake the cutest frog ever

He’s gonna knead the dough like the kitty he is

And then he’s gonna ask you to help him shape the lil friend

Also, there’s no stopping him, he’s naming this frog

This frog is going to be his illegitimate child okay

You’re gonna coparent like pros

I mean, until you eat the poor thing, of course

Joong is definitely gonna make sure to do all the stuff thats even kind of dangerous

Like you need food scissors to open a new bag of ingredients? Joongie will do it

Need to put the dough in the preheated oven? Joongie will do it

And while you guys are waiting for the froggie friend to bake, you will start making dinner to go along with the bread

Once everything is finished, and the oven timer goes off, Joongie is so 

excited to see the finished product

You open the oven and see your perfect lil frog baby (shout out to Frog Baby at my uni lmao)

I mean he’s a lil wonky but thats okay you still love him

You make sure to take plenty of pictures with your creation before you end up dipping his eyes in your pasta sauce O.O

Seonghwa:

Seonghwa’s frog is going to be perfect okay

Like he will take this project very seriously

He will sculpt this frog with the utmost patience and gentleness

And he won’t let you touch it

Like if you even try to help him he will shun you

Full kick you out of the kitchen without question

And if you try to distract him, he will send you the absolute dirtiest glare

Do not mess with Mama Hwa while he is making frog bread

But if you really want to be in the kitchen with him, he will allow you to start making your actual dinner 

Will allow one (1) back-hug when you pass by him

And once dinner is ready, he will be so proud of his froggie

He will make you close your eyes and make it a big reveal

Has the cutest, proudest smile on his face

And he will tell you to open your eyes and be like “isn’t my son perfect”

“Don’t you mean our son?”

“No, you did nothing”

“YOU WOULDNT LET ME”

“BECAUSE HE IS MY MASTERPIECE”

But forreal his froggie is so perfect, unmatched honestly

Yunho:

Yunho is going to make this a competition okay

Who can make the best frog bread

So you both make lil biscuit sized froggie friends 

While they are baking, you are both having a very intense debate about whose will be the better froggie

Who will have the most attractive frog

Long story short, the oven timer beeps and you both whip your heads towards the sound

Like its so dramatic

You race towards the oven and fling it open

Cue dramatic heavenly music

Now cue a doom and gloom sound effect bc your froggie has flattened completely

Yunho is hysterical and laughing bc your frog has stuck itself to the pan and its entire underside is burned

And Yunho’s little biscuit is a little bit burned, but mostly perfect

You’re pouting at him bc your poor little froggie didn’t work out the way you had wanted

Then he feels bad and he carves a smile into his lil froggie’s face

Promises to share his froggie biscuit with you so that you won’t feel too sad that yours got destroyed

Yeosang:

Yeosang is turning this into the messiest arts and crafts project you’ve ever done in your life

Full on food fighting with you

Super cheesy and cute

Tossing flour all over the place

You both have so much flower in your hair that it just looks like bad dandruff at this point

You both take plenty of pictures of you laughing together and being covered in flour

It’s actually super cute until you remember that you’ll have to clean up when you’re all finished

Somehow the frog eventually gets in the oven

You pass the time waiting for the froggie to finish by cleaning up the kitchen

Once that timer beeps, both of you look at each other

You’re kind of nervous to see how he turned out, seeing that you guys had messed around the entire time

But surprisingly, the froggie comes out looking decent!

You’re both super excited to eat him though

Yeosang’s immediately like “should we eat his legs first?” Lmao

San:

San’s frog bread making experience is pretty much the most romantic baking date you’ll ever have

He’s singing softly the entire time

Laughing quietly whenever either of you cracks a joke

Will totally dance with you while you wait for the bread to finish baking

Like its so sweet and romantic the whole time

But then the oven dings

And you’re both so excited to see the finished product

The oven opens… and the romance is gone

Because both of you are literally rolling on the ground laughing so hard

Like its a recognizable attempt

Its just that, instead of frog bread, it looks like “a frog that got smushed bread”

He’s just really really flat

Almost fills the entire pan with his flatness

Tears are running down both of your faces as you cackle like Dr. Frankenstein over your creation

“FLAT BOIIIIII”

But he tasted good and I guess thats all that really matters

Mingi:

Okay so when you start out it actually looks pretty good right

Super cute, kind of cartoony frog child 

You and Mingi are having a blast while making it too

Playing music super loud and dancing around like maniacs

Literally screaming lyrics in each others faces

Just having a good time together and you’re both super happy

You kind of cool off a little and do some dishes while you’re waiting for your froggie to finish baking

When the oven timer finally dings you both rush over to see the finished product

“WHAT HAPPENED TO HIM”

“I DONT KNOW HE LOOKS LIKE THE CRAB FROM MOANA”

“AHHHH” “AHHHHH”

But then you’re laughing bc I mean look at him lmao

“We tried, I guess”

And you really did try, so you just giggled at it

forgive me froggie for we have sinned

Then you put your frog abomination on a pretty plate

And waited for him to cool so you could try a piece of the bread

Wooyoung:

Okay first of all

Wooyoungie is going to want to make a dozen mini froggies for all of his friends okay

He will make a dozen of these lil guys just to make sure he has enough to share

He will have you help him and you try to make them all as identical as possible

And after a painstaking hour of molding dough into perfect little froggie shapes: its time for the oven

While you’re waiting for the bread to bake, you do the dishes and he thanks you sincerely for helping him make these little treats

He’s really proud and excited about giving these to the members because he knows how much time and effort you had both spent to make these perfect

Once the oven timer dings, you guys pull the little froggie friends out and place them on a baking stand to cool down

He takes pictures of each one and will serve them up specifically for each member

Baker Wooyoung is just the softest baby okay

Jongho:

This boy is going to make an entire froggie family and you cannot stop him

Will end up being cheesy and be like “thats you and thats me”

“And these are our babies”

And he’s so excited

He will name the little baby ones

And he’s discussing with you super seriously

“What about this name? No? We can choose another one”

Will literally look up baby names for inspiration

Like oh its serious

Once they’re finished baking

He’s going to plate them up so that they look like a family and they’re all cuddled up together

And he will take a picture of them

Then photoshop the babies names on them

And he will be like “which of the parent frogs do you want to be?”

And once you pick the one you want to be, he will photoshop your names in the picture too

Then he sends a picture to the ateez group chat and of course the guys are like ewwwwnoooo until their girlfriends say that they want to do it too lmao

[magicflowershop]

one day kitty; Kita version

《inspired by movie A Whisker Away》

✿✿ you wished to be with the person you like and wish granted. whiskers, button nose, tail, four legs and ears on top of the head; you turned into a cat. with this, you are given the opportunity to be with the person you want to express your affections to. but as a cat. and only in one day.

― haikyuu characters x cat!reader imagines!

❀ masterlist ❀

the wheel of names have spoken.

kita was having a good time by himself in his grandmother’s rice fields, feeling the breeze like the precious farm boi he is,,, when he saw a cat sleeping on a wet patch in the middle of the field

gathering concern for the little cat, he brought him home and decided to clean it up 

then you woke up

you felt something scrubbing your back when you open your eyes you see a guy aiming a hose at you 

you scream bc obv, but that scream translated into a screech leaving your mouth and you see your hand

homie that was a paw

why do u have a paw?????

"stay still, you might hurt yourself”

and why is there a Kita Shinsuke spraying water at you lmao

you see that he’s kinda annoyed that you’re moving so much while he’s trying to clean you up but at the same time you arent sure since he isnt easy to read and that don’t know him too well rip so you let yourself be cleaned for free ig

but yo what the hell??? so you’re a cat now????

you try to remember what happened before all this and how in the world you suddenly turned into a cat and magically wake up in Kita’s place 

you dont know the exact location of his place so you have no idea how to get back home from here

Kita pulled the cat closer to him, and wiping the wet fur with a towel as generously as he could that the cat soon found comfort from his gentle caresses

okay maybe you could stay for a while yk huehue

“you’re having fun”

you hear a familiar voice from a mile away, you look back and see a fat, creepy cat standing on two of its hind feet

o wait

you saw that cat last night when you were watching the shooting star outside,,, you thought it’d be cute if you suddenly wished for something so you did then that thing appeared outta nowhere promising you that he can make your wish come true than compared to a stupid star

so he forced the wish outta you

that you wished to be closer to a guy you admired,, and you had a lot of crushes in your school ykyk,,, just that Kita takes the entire cake

“you have until midnight to remain as a cat. be sure to leisurely fulfill your desires, y/n.”

and so he vanished

while knowing full well you’re basically Cinderella now, you take consideration of your leisure time with Kita-sama

do you stay or do you go home first to check on your household

“oh what do we have here?”

Kita’s grandma entered the scene and you think that okay maybe this development is a little too quick since you weren’t ready to face his relatives yet

“i found this cat in the fields. it looked like it could get sick so i cleaned it”

o yea you were a damn cat

also Kita calls you freakin “it”

:) 

pennywise who

you chose to stay in Kita’s place bc grandma thought it’d be lovely to let you stay there for a while,, and that you looked like you were starving when you saw the food on the table

thank goodness you were a cat bc jesus were you actually drooling

so you spent time in Kita’s place big deal

but his place isn’t what you’re aimed for no?

“i’m leaving”

Kita says putting on his shoes, ready to leave and he’s wearing casual clothes,, you don’t think he’s going to school for volleyball practice

IS HE GOING ON A DATE????????????

lmao

as if thats actually true cmon Kita doesn’t even hang out with girls that much,,, even though he prolly has a bunch of admirers like the other Inarizaki Vball bois

but what if he swang that wae?

??????????

so you followed him right?

you wanted to find out where he’s headed also that he looked good in casual clothes you just want to keep looking at him like this 

Kita went to the grocery store

ah

and apparently he was buying ingredients to make food

ahh

so you begin to think that you were foolish for lowkey gate-keeping him

like sis cmon you’re a cat rn keep your head in the game,, what do you do with those paws of yours that cant even grab his hand and pull him away when he was about to bump into a girl as he was about to grab a bottle of tomato paste

heck you cant even get inside the damn grocery store and walk in between them cause you’re a fcking cat!!!!!!!!

you watch their mouths say sorries to each other

the girl was blushing

hm?

Kita looked worried that he couldve hurt her since the hag was coverin her face

hm

nani k

n̸̢̪̜͚͑́̾́̑̋ á̴̠̜̳͖̼̃͗̚͘͠ͅ n̵̼͙͇̻̹̓͜͜ i̷̥̲̻̪͈̞̙̩͛̾̅̓͝͝͠ ̶̨̡̜̞̟͆̿̈́͜ḵ̶̂̓̀̚ o̶͎͛̋̋̊͋̊̅̈̅ͅ r̶͙̮̱͊̎͠ ę̷̺̪͎͈̗̖̯̣͍͒͊̒͆͂̈́͛́̒̃

you started tapping the glass windows like mad SKSKD

and ofc since you’re a stray animal ppl wont let u get away with absolutely anything so one personnel saw you tapping the windows and shouted at you from inside the store

Kita and the hag saw you and yea that was enough embarrassment for the day, you ran away and let your feet take you wherever 

its a bit boring that since its a weekend there’s nothing to do,, you never expected that Kita’s weekends would be this boring too :(

so the creepy cat appeared

“what’s wrong you dont seem to be enjoying yourself anymore”

“turn me back to human i need to finish my homework”

maybe thats not the most liable excuse you have but it is true that you need to finish an assignment

“but i gave you a chance to be with the person you admire, no? is this not enough?”

“yea well its-”

“here you are”

you feel someone pick you up and you see that it was Kita:0he must’ve looked for you since you dont even know where you are

oh my god Kita Shinsuke looked for you ma’am eye- or mayhaps you took the route back to his house without knowing since you were busy staring at him when you were stalking him earlier ye

you watched how he looked at the creepy cat you were talking to and and judged it from head to hind feet lmao Kita

“do you have the same owner as this cat?”

he asked you and you gave out every ounce of your energy to shake your head as a no as well as to let out the most disgusted and disapproval meow you ever could-

“the hell would i want to be acquainted with that thing!”

a

what

no way did u just speak

so Kita stared at you for the remainder of the time but decided you speaking isnt physically possible and that he could’ve been real tired since he saw the Miya twins along the way

he took you back home since his grandma seemed to be real happy seeing a little animal in the house with them

but you didnt miss to see the little knowing smile from the creepy cat from earlier, you just knew from that alone that he was messing with you since as you said you were bored 

it was wrong of you to talk to that lil disgusting thing

since that moment you refused to speak with your mouth every again, if you were going to speak thought you would probably just purposely say meow only to not make anymore mistakes

also you’re spending a lot of time with Kita’s grandma than Kita himself

“i wonder what your future spouse is doing at this moment, Shin-kun”

Kita looked like he wanted to roll his eyes so bad lmao since he always hears things about his grandma wanting to see his wedding before she dies :c

and yk it makes you sad too just hearing about this

and you want to help 😔

and you would offer help 😌

they heard the cat speak and now you’re running away bc they heard you talk about wanting to marry Shinsuke 🤡

the day ended and you managed to go home before the sun set basically nothing happened and your transformation was all for nuttin, you were bamboozled by a demon cat you randomly saw one night

the next day you were back to your human self and it was a school day so ofc you have to live on normally in school as if nothing happened, as if you didnt just stalk a guy from your school but we’ll get to that

see, you’re friends are friends with a few of the guys from your school’s volleyball team,,, so you’re within vicinity of Kita’s attention 

when you explicitly did not want to see him atm

BUT THEN YOU REMEMBER YOUR FRIENDS KNOW YOU LIKE KITA

WHAT THE HELL DO YOU DO NOW

you decided to run away but you realize that’s useless bc you’re all going home together :D

now you weren’t the crowds type of person,, you had no idea how it come to this, you’re used to hanging out with your girlfriends yes but they were having fun altogether like this it was fun just watching them goof off and whatnot

“hey”

when i told you you’re almost dropped the second you hear Kita calling to you, you best believe

you said hey but in a different tone of voice bc it was too early for him to notice you had the same voice as the cat he saw yesterday,,, then you both walked in silence

you couldnt take it anymore and decided to go to the nearest convenience store since you had something you want to buy,, you went and whispered this to your friends but when they were asking you to let your voice out, you were deadass croaking

but then you clown yourself sum more bc Kita was concerned of you acting like this and asked if you were alright

now you’re stuck with him in the convenience store bc your friends and his friends thought it’d be a great idea for him to go with you :D

“you should eat something warm before going to sleep, and take a warm bath too”

:((((((

okay now you feel bad for actually making him worry lol

your alibi of getting sick works really well with not speaking at all around him so you used this till the end thinking you can escape him with this until it rained and you dont have an umbrella with you

aight y/n you’re one hell of a clutz

Kita was enough of a gentleman to buy an umbrella for you until its actually out of stock

you guys stayed in the convenience store for the time being

you were losing your mind

how much longer will you stay with him

you thought of an alibi to save you from the embarrassment so you told him you gotta jet and go back to school bc you forgot to bring your notebook with you 

but now you realize you realize you didnt have to tell him bc he’ll still follow you as if his life depends on taking care of you :(

after you randomly stormed out of the convenience store, he caught up to you and pulled you somewhere where there’s a roof over

“are you usually this reckless? or do you just like getting yourself sick?”

homie does not hold back

he pulled a spare shirt from his back and put it on your head,, proceeding to wipe your wet hair with it until he realized he’s subconsciously invading your personal space

he looked right at you, so you two were standing there,,, staring,, his hands on both sides of your head,,,,, both of y’all are wet hunni

he let go and turned the other way,,, the darkness wasnt dark enough to conceal his red cheeks and hunni you made him blush aight

“you reminded me of a cat i saw yesterday im sorry about that”

“you dont have to apologize”

o sis you did it now

you s p o k e

so Kita was beyond surprised to hear that voice again,,,, and this time from yOU,, ALL NORMAL,, NO FROGS

“i, i can explain”

he looked at you confused, hell was he so confused, that you sounded exactly like the voice he randomly heard yesterday which made him think that came from the cat,, he didnt think that was physically possible bc yk but the embarrassment from your face was enough for him to guess

“did you really say you’re willing to marry me”

gOD

“i mean,,, i don’t mind”

“grandma would be glad”

stay tuned for more!