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dokifluffs · 3 years ago

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You’re Safe | Sakusa Kiyoomi

Pairing: Kiyoomi X Reader (female)

Genre: MAFIA!AU, dad and husbando tehe, fluffy, action? thriller??

Author’s Note: mafia 🤝 protective 🤝 domestic father figure 🤝 SAKUSA

Warnings: k*lling, blood, vivid imagery, LONG, language

gif from @rivaillerose 🖤

“Y/N,” a husky voice spoke your name, pulling you from your much needed rest as life of being a new mother had been challenging though so far, it wasn’t anything you couldn’t handle

“Y/N, darling.”

You groaned in your sleep, not wanting to wake, to leave the warmth that you were so comfortable laying in

The edge of the bed shifted as a weight sat down beside you, making your body move toward the person

You brought yourself to open your eyes as heavy as they were, your vision clearing to find your husband sat beside you, his mask pulled down to his chin

The room was gloomy and gray though the curtains were open, not a bit of sunlight shining through as he looked down to you with gentle eyes

Despite his softer side with you, he was still the head of the clan - and his appearance matched him as well

He donned a black wool overcoat with the same colored turtleneck and mask

“What is it, Omi?” You asked sleepily as he cupped your cheek with his black gloved hand

His black gloves were always an accessory he had on him, whether he was wearing them or not

He had a thing with germs but he also saw no need to get his hands dirty when his men were always there to do the job for him

You nuzzled your face into his touch, very tempted to fall asleep holding him close but as your mind woke up more and more, you remembered what today was

What he had to do, where he had to go

“I’m leaving soon.. I’ll be back in a few days..” he whispered as he moved a strand of your hair from your face

You wanted to pretend you didn’t hear these words, that he never told you he had to leave or when he did

A part of you wished he left without telling you but an even greater part was so grateful that he woke you

“Do you really have to go again?” You squeezed his gloved hand as you sat yourself up straighter

“You know how my father is... He wants to make sure things are... under control.. I promise I’ll be back in two days.”

The way he spoke, the words fell so effortlessly from those lips, his voice low and cutting through the space yet he spoke at a volume as if he was telling you a great secret

“You said that last time and he kept you with him for a couple weeks...” you thought back to that time

You were seven months pregnant, almost eight, at the time and it was like he fell off the face of the earth

You couldn’t go anywhere or do anything but reside in the manor and you couldn’t even talk to him

You were alone again

“Don’t go...”

the nights in bed alone, the cramps, emotional rollercoasters, motion sickness, nausea

You at least wished he could have called you

The nightmares you had, the worst case scenarios playing in your head until you woke up with tears streaming down your face, only for you to cry yourself silently back to sleep as fear pooled and plagued you from within

He could see the sadness in your eyes and he could remember vividly the mental torture he was put under

No communication to you and all he could at most to see you was through the hidden cameras all connected to his phone

Even checking in on you had to be done in secret, all to make sure that he was strong enough to continue on the family business even if he had to lose you or be away for unpredictable amounts of time

It was unbearable then and it was still unbearable now

He never asked to grow up into the business of the underworld, let alone take it over from his father at the prime age of 20 four years ago

He never wanted your life to be taken away when you two had already been together when he was recruited

“I’m sorry, darling, but you know I have to,” he sighed. “You know how my father is.” He cupped your cheek and kissed your temple then lips before he stood

“Am I going to lose you?” Your voice broke the silence, breaking through the white sound of the downpour outside

But you had stopped your question early

“Am I going to lose you today? Tomorrow? One day?”

He stood frozen in his place before he could reach for the knob

“No, Y/N. You won’t.” His eyes paused for a bit on you as he thought about his response, the fatigue of being a mother was already showing. “I’ll be able to call you this time and I’m the head now. The only title my father has to me now is father.”

“You won’t.” He stepped back over to you leaned down to kiss you again. “Not today at least…”

“I’ll call you at supper time, darling. Have a good day.”

You did your best to hold onto his hand as long as you could, to remember his touch, his voice, his scent, the way he looked before he walked out those doors

Because some days or nights, you never truly know if you would ever see him again

And it terrified you

The sound of the rain only seemed to get more intense now that he was gone and you were here

But now your day was beginning now that you were awake

You slipped out of the king sized bed, leaving the warmth you had slept in as the soft carpet at your feet, your toes sinking into the fibers

Brushing your teeth, showering in the grand bathroom of the manor, it was a life you surely never expected but here you were

Kiyoomi’s father and his entire family had built their name from nothing to the global known corporation that it was today

You dried your body off, finding what to wear today through the walk in closet and once that was found, it was breakfast

“Good morning, madam, shall I bring you your breakfast to the master suite?” Your right hand maid had greeted you as you stepped out as she carried the laundry with her

“Oh, thank you, Olivia, but I’ll head down to the kitchen after waking D/N,” you smiled to the older maid that had worked for the Sakusa family for decades

All the staff that worked and lived in the estates on the property outside of the manor were trained security, men and women, whose jobs were to protect the main family, to serve them, and to keep others who would pose a threat away and out, even if it meant killing them

But you always tried not to think or wonder about how many people these staff have killed or beat up or anything whenever you interacted with them, especially when they greeted you with a smile

They were there to protect you and to make sure that nothing and no would would ever harm your life

You stepped into the nursery, the wide room decorated with warm lights and stuffed animals, some more than twice the size of your daughter

“Hi,” you smiled so brightly seeing your baby’s eyes already open, looking up to you as she sat in her crib, holding onto her blankie. “Good morning precious,” you lowered the front gate of the crib so you could kneel down to her level

Sakusa sat in the limousine as he watched the scene of you and your daughter in the nursery, wishing he could just turn the car around and to stay home

Things were in balance, he knew this already but his father’s orders were orders he still had to respect

He clicked off his phone, tucking the device into his pocket as he was to be in the car for quite a bit of time before he would get to his father’s

The biggest smile spread on her face as she laughed seeing you, her bubbliness seeming to make all the gloominess disappear

“Let’s get you changed~” you chimed as you lifted the baby girl into your arms, getting a whiff of her heavy diaper and finding an outfit for her day

“Olivia?” You called into the custom intercom by the nursery’s closet, though there was practically one in every room

“Yes, madam?”

“Sorry for troubling you, but could you actually bring breakfast for D/N and I up to the upstairs loft? You could even send it up the dumbwaiter and that’s fine too.”

“Of course, would you like the usual?”

“Yes please, thank you.”

You carried your little girl toward the upstairs loft, one of your favorite areas of the house since it was significantly smaller - well almost - than the living room downstairs

The loft didn’t extend all the way downstairs like how the ground floor’s living room ceiling extended to the second floor

More than ten thousand square feet of property, more rooms in the manor than you knew what to do with them

Four guest bedrooms with full bathrooms, a grand study and two story “little” library, two main bedrooms in addition to the master bedroom and a nursery

So much space, all sorts of technologies, gadgets and gizmos of all sorts in the house

All the systems in the house was made by the Sakusa corporation to ensure security

This even included your and Kiyoomi’s custom made phones

There was also the basement- all sorts of fun activities to be done: a pool, pool table, living room area that opened up to the backyard with the bar and barbecue, the fire pit

and finally, there was the cellar that was the only place Kiyoomi had requested that you never go - and you never did

You knew that look in his eye, that tone of voice and you knew he had requested this for your best

And most importantly, there were three safe rooms, all three upstairs with hidden entryways to protect you, official guests, and anyone in the family

Before you knew it, Olivia had made her way upstairs with the breakfast as you played with your daughter in the loft, bouncing her on your lap sat on the wide couch

The loft was brightly lit and open, toys of all types for your daughter to play with as the TV played the morning kids show

As filled as the house was with the special staff and things to do, it still felt so lonely and empty as you sat there

You had tried to chat and converse with them but they never loosened up, always keeping all the formalities but it was never any use

The storm outside seemed to be getting worse as your eyes gazed to the horizon, spotting the trees at the edge of the estate where all their branches had been swaying in the wind, the paler, underside of their leaves revealed

Thunder began to rumble in the distance with the occasional flash of lightning but both unbothered your daughter and you as the two of you remained in the loft

You watched as she rolled about on a blanket, playing with her stuffed animals and the other interactive toys that played music to keep her entertained while you watched the TV, finding nothing remotely as entertaining to watch

But just before you could change the channel to yet another disappointing channel, your attention was pulled to your phone vibrating beside you, your eyes lighting up as you saw the caller ID

“You seem so bored,” Kiyoomi’s deep voice sounded through the phone but he spoke the truth

You were tired and bored but you didn’t want to sleep - it would only make you unable to sleep later tonight anyways

“I am,” you sighed as you muted the TV. “How far out have you gone?”

“Actually, not too far. Only about half an hour since there was a major accident on the highway so we had to take a detour. But traffic is terrible so we were stuck for quite a bit before we could actually exit,” Sakusa almost groaned thinking about the terrible accident

How he was stuck in a single place for practically twenty minutes

“Wow, do you know what happened?”

“Well there was a…” his voice drowned out in your ears as you could hear something that didn’t sound like rain or thunder - they were too distinctly different

Loud bangs echoed in the distance, bringing your attention elsewhere though all you could look was outside the wall window to the dark skies

But you couldn’t see anything except the normal background of the property but it was just silent again with the white noise of rain washing down the glass, followed by thunder and a flash of lightning as the storm brewed closer and closer

“I’m sorry what? I missed what you said... I think I heard… something weird..” you spoke as you looked outside the windows that looked to the back of the property

You could hear echoes of movement downstairs, the bustling business of the special staff in the house but it sounded standard... or so you thought

“What did you hear?”

“..I don’t know.. maybe it was the storm and I’m just distracted...” you smiled into the phone as you spoke while your daughter happily crawled to you, laying her head on your legs, her puffy cheeks round as ever

“Well, you two were my only source of entertainment so far this trip,” the corner of his lips curled as he picked off small specks off his suit

“That makes one… of us-“ your thought died out in a matter of seconds

You heard louder, clearer bangs while the staff that had been stationed with you just outside the loft talked over their ear coms to another elsewhere

Before you could continue your sentence or call, the bangs only got louder and your body reacted faster than you could say or think

Clear gunshots began firing at the front entrance, echoing off the high walls and ceilings of the manor while the staff worked on securing the doors and all other entrances and possible ones

“Y/N?” Sakusa could only hear the subtle commotion happening but it was clear you weren’t on the phone. “Shit shit shit..” he stayed on the line as he changed to the security cameras he had access to he used to watch you and your guys’ daughter

Looking through the camera surveillance, he caught a glimpse of you disappearing with your phone in hand while your arms carried your daughter as you disappeared toward the bedroom

“Turn back now,” Kiyoomi howled as his driver did just that, not wasting a single second

You ran into the master suite’s walk in closet that led to the entryway of one of the safe rooms, your baby girl in your arms as she held on to you her whines already beginning before they would turn into cries

“Shh, it’s okay, baby, mama’s gonna protect you,” you smiled, whispering, your voice already shaky, lips trembling as you pressed a little kiss to the top of her head. “Even if it costs my life, precious.”

You moved, leaving the master suite and stayed low as you walked across the “bridge” that connected the loft to the other half of the house

Peeking down, you could hear groans of agony, puddles and splashes of of blood on the floor and walls, empty bullet shells on the ground, shards of glass and broken windows

“Search the house, find that bitch,” a deep voice yelled through the manor as for the first time since the loud bangs happened, it sounded so still, like any normal rainy day

But this was far from normal

You crawled across the marble flooring toward the library

There wasn’t any safe room here but the safe rooms were sure to be where they would look, whoever they were

They were able to get through the security, it seemed like the staff was dead

You silently stood as they scoured the lower levels - you could hear them and all the destruction they were havocking

The cars outside the window blurred into mere colors that passed as the limousine sped through the roads back towards the manor

To save time, they went toward the back roads — it was just the slightest bit longer but time could be shaved down since there were no cars anywhere

“Step on it!” Sakusa commanded as his men readied themselves. “Call in Unit 0,” he demanded as he kept his eyes on the cameras, trying to find you yet he couldn’t see you in the master suite’s safe room

Unit 0 being one of the few very highly trained professional assassins and killers who were at the disposal of the Sakusa family whenever needed

He scoured through the cameras, not even caring about all the destruction being done, all he needed to see was where you and your daughter were

You carefully entered the library, shutting the door behind you as you walked over the wooden floors carefully

Every step made your palms sweaty but your heart stopped after hearing a loud creak in the old floors

The worst part was that there was no way to lock the doors

outside of the door, you couldn’t hear too much but you could still clearly hear the storm as a great big window stretched from the floor to ceiling so all the lighting in here was natural

There was something about the walls surrounding the library that made it sound proof in a sense

You constantly bounced your baby girl in your arms to keep her calm as you tried to get a look outside as you approached one of the corners toward the window

“Search upstairs,” one of the men demanded as a handful of men ran upstairs. “Find her.”

The scoured through all the rooms, flipping every room apart, destroying things, tearing the curtains off, flipping the beds, wrecking the nursery

You peeked out the window that faced the front of the manor yet all you could see were broken things and to your horror, more lifeless bodies of the manor’s staff

But before you could look out any longer, a large rock was launched at the window, breaking the glass, shattering it

Your baby girl let out a loud cry in fear, making your heart drop

“No, D/N, shhhh, please, it’ll be okay, we’ll be okay.” You quickly pulled open the latch to the library’s hidden passage where the door was one of the bookcases

As soon as you closed the bookcase, you heard the door to the library burst open

Several men, guns ready

You scanned your finger print for the room to be safely locked however it wouldn’t let you. All you could do to make sure the room was locked was to see your body to keep the door shut and still

They walked through the wide open doorway to the library scanning the two open floors that was connected by two black steel staircases that wound their way up and down, connecting the two floors

“Shh, please,” you whimpered to your daughter as she cried into your chest as you stayed by the passage’s door so you could look out the peephole

They pulled books off the shelves, throwing them from the second level to the first, knocking the paintings off the walls, ripping them by sliding their knives through the canvas’, kicking them, breaking the frames

The ground shook as you heard a a loud boom, making you jump in your spot, the ground rumbling and shaking below where you sat

It sounded like a bomb went off on the lower level but you assumed it was the cars in the garage since you could hear the repeating alarm sounding off

Your daughters cries began to start back up at the loud noise, as you did your best to shush her

“Shhh, it’s okay,” you whispered to her as you wiped her tears, keeping her face to your chest as you stroked your trembling hand down her back as tears trickled down your cheeks and dripped off your chin

The limousine slid on the gravel outside the manor as Sakusa’s men sprang to action from the vehicle

Kiyoomi stayed in his seat, continuously scouring through the cameras but you were yet to be found

He couldn’t find a single trace of you

His men, as well as unit 0, entered through the blown open entrance, broken shards of glass crunching beneath their steps as they surrounded the estate the best they could, splitting up to eliminate the intruders

“Where are you, Y/N?” His heart hammered in his chest as he desperately tried to find you yet nothing

But before he could look any further, his heart dropped seeing the red system failure message. Whoever these people were, they were impressive, but not fast enough

Kiyoomi now meant business now that he had no access to actually see if you were okay

He ran out of the limousine as gunshots could be heard all throughout the house as half his men made their way to the upper level while the other half wiped out the intruders on the lower level

He followed behind unit 0, making their way upstairs

He clung onto his gun tightly in his hand, finger ready on the trigger as he barged into the master suite, firing two bullets into the chest and head of a large man as he was pillaging the closets

All the precious jewelry he bought for you were now stained in the pool of the filthy blood of the man who had the audacity to enter the premises

His heart almost dropped seeing him in the closet in the first place but it didn’t seem like the man noticed the entrance to the safe room behind the clothes on the hangers

As he pushed the luxurious wardrobe aside opening the door and to his fear, you were nowhere to be seen

More gunshots sounded off, echoing through the halls, sounding off the walls

He couldn’t focus, his thoughts incoherent, unfinished sentences running in his head as he just ran, killing those in his way to find you

A gun war was going off throughout the library as Sakusa’s men fired at the intruders on both levels but they had great firepower too

Both sides hid behind the marble pillars, the different bookshelves and furniture in the room as the rain showered in

Your baby girl cried loudly, her shaken cries sounding off throughout the passage

“No, no, no, please, baby.” Your heart raced as you dared to look out the peephole, only for it to drop as you saw a man you didn’t recognize yell something to another man near him

The man he yelled to fired more shots while the other one approached the passage entrance, banging noises coming through the bookshelf

“She’s in here! Hold them off!” The man yelled

“No, no, no.” Tears welled in your eyes as you did your best to keep the door closed but there was no actual way to since this was just a simple passageway

Your daughter cried loudly in your arms while you gave it your all to keep the door closed

Amongst all the shots being fired, Kiyoomi heard the words the man yelled and then it clicked

He knew where you were

“No.” This one word repeated in his head as he pushed through the front, racing past the bullets being shot towards him as he ran on pure adrenaline

“Boss, no!” His men yelled but this only got the intruders to focus on him, giving them the opening to shoot them all

Kiyoomi shot the man closer to him in the legs before letting his body move on pure killer instinct as he grabbed the man who had fallen to his knees by his jaw, snapping his neck

The other man changed his focus to Kiyoomi as he stood to his feet while the other struggled to pull his gun from his holster

Kiyoomi towered over him as his body moved on his own

He kicked the man to the wall, pressing the barrel of his gun to the man’s chin, pulling the trigger without a second thought

You squeeze your eyes shut, facing the other way from the door, bracing yourself

“I love you. Mama loves you, baby,” you whispered as you cried, a loud rumbling filling your ears as you felt the door being forced open

This was it

You were going to die

Your daughter was doing to die

you let out a blood curtling scream feeling the hands of whoever grab onto you, pulling you, kicking your legs to try to fight

“Y/N, Y/N, Y/N!” Kiyoomi’s familiar voice sounded louder and louder over the rumbling you heard in your ears from clenching and bracing your body and your daughter’s

“It’s me, It’s just me!” He soothed you as he turned you

You couldn’t explain or even begin to describe the relief you felt wash through your body, your heart racing and slowing down at the same time as you broke down, your cries mixing with your daughter’s

“You’re safe, I’m here,” Kiyoomi pulled you into his arms, your body shaking terribly in his arms as you cried into his chest, all the fear you felt flooding your senses

“I know, I’m sorry this happened, but you’re okay. Everything will be okay,” he whispered as he pulled you into his lap, keeping the passage door somewhat closed

You were already put through enough today and he didn’t need you to see the second degree murder crime scene he had committed right outside

“I’m here, I’m here.” He reached up and pulled his mask off as he kissed the top of your head all over, wiping away your tears with his thumbs but you couldn’t stop crying

But that was entirely fine

“But Y/N,” he held your face in his bare hands, his normal gloves off as he stroked his thumb over your cold, damp cheeks

“Why didn’t you go into the safe rooms, darling?” His own voice was unsteady, his lips quivered, eyes teary. “I looked for you and I couldn’t find you and I thought I lost you..” His voice broke off as he gathered himself the best he could, taking deep breaths

Seeing Kiyoomi like this, it broke your heart even more

“I’m sorry, I don’t know what… I was just scared and- and-“ It hurt you so much

Everything about today did

But just this moment was Kiyoomi, it also touched you

He was such a stoic man, usually one to show a softer, affectionate side with you but this was the first time you saw him shed tears

A man who had taken so many lives was now showing his true emotions for the two lives he would give his own live for a hundred times over if it meant you and your daughter was okay

“I know, I know, but you’re safe,” he let out a deep, relieving breath as he hugged your head closer, your body shaking uncontrollably in his arms

“And hey, shhh, it’s okay baby. Papa’s here.” He stroked your daughter’s head as she sort of calmed down as the two of you sat together, doing your best as parents to shoo away her sadness while his men did their best to first and foremost clear the bodies and blood

You absolutely did not need to see that after today

“You two are both safe.” He breathed as he pulled you two impossibly closer, letting the shakiness of his own heart disperse

“You’re safe…”

~~~~~ Thanks for reading! Masterlist for more! Please do not repost anywhere else!

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chincilla-on-the-moon · 3 years ago

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My Whole World- Connor Murphy X Reader

Request: I am in desperate need of a fic where Connor finds that the reader struggles with self harm and where he helps them though such thoughts and just ends with some fluffy cuddles. Anything is better than what’s going on rn - Anon

Word Count: 1009

Warnings: Implied Self harm (cutting), Self-loathing, Self-hatred, Feeling like a burden

Authors Note: Hello! I know I’m literally the worst ever but honestly existing this past year has been really hard which makes doing the things I enjoy, like writing, really hard to do. BUT I do finally think I’m reaching a better place, (I know I say this like every authors note but I really think I am this time). Also saw the DEH movie last night and ended up sobbing over Connor I love him so much :((. Lastly and most importantly: if you ever feel like self harming there are alternatives! If you need resources about this feel free to message me or send me an ask! I’m more than happy to help <3 Thats it. As all ways thank you for reading and have a lovely day/night! :) <3

You were having an awful day, an awful week even. It seemed everything that could go wrong did. It just seemed the world was against you and you were tired of it. You were approaching your breaking point and fast. You could see this but you didn’t know what to do about it. You could reach out to your boyfriend Connor. But no he was doing so well recently and you didn’t want to burden him or bring him down with your negative thoughts. So you decided to do what you always did which was just distract yourself from your emotions because if you didn’t think about them they weren’t there. You put your earbuds in and put on one of the playlists Connor had made for you, once you got home and went up to your room without saying a word to anyone and plopped face down into your bed. For a couple minutes you were able to ignore all the thoughts racing through your mind but eventually the music stopped working and you were left alone with your thoughts.

You’re pathetic and a burden to everyone. Why would anyone want to deal with you, especially Connor? You’re probably the most annoying person on the planet right? With your constant pestering and need for reassurance every two seconds it’s truly a wonder that you haven’t been abandoned by everyone in your life.

You were angry at yourself. How could you possibly let yourself be this awful of a person? You wanted to do something horrible to yourself as a punishment, to force yourself to feel the pain you bring to everyone in your life.

The next time you had a coherent thought was at least a half hour later. You felt a stinging sensation coming from your wrists and started crying as you fully processed what you had done. Without realizing it you texted Connor asking him to come over. You just sat waiting staring at nothing until Connor knocked on the door to your room. You were broken out of your trance and weakly said “It’s open” so he knew he could come in.

Once Connor opened the door he knew something was up. The energy in the room just felt wrong. Then he saw your hunched figure on the bed and could tell something was up just by how you were sitting and approached the bed slowly so as to not startle you. Once he came into your field of vision you broke down even more feeling so pathetic in this moment. “Oh sweetheart,” he says softly. He sat down in front of you and took one of your arma in his hand and inspected the damage gently. He did the same with the other and once he was done he opened his arms and you crashed into his chest, violently crying at this point. He held you tight and pressed soft kisses into your head. He just let you cry it out rubbing soft circles into your back but while he was he couldn’t help but think how could the light of his life ever feel so bad that you felt you had to do this to yourself?

Once your cries had calmed down to soft sniffles every once in a while he said “Let’s get you cleaned up then we can cuddle. Sound good?” You nodded tiredly. “Okay let’s go to the bathroom,” he said, grabbing your hands to pull you up and guide you to the bathroom. Once you got there you sat on the counter and Connor got to work. He carefully applied antibiotic ointment and bandages to the affected areas and when he was done pressed gentle kisses to all of the bandages. After that he cleaned up his ‘workspace’ and led you back to your bedroom. The two got ready and had settled into your bed when he broke the comfortable silence that had settled between you two. “You know we have to talk about this right?” You nodded timidly. “Why?” he said simply. You explained how terrible this week had been for you and how it all got to be too much. The whole time Connor listened with his undivided attention on you, holding your hand and rubbing soothing circles with his thumb. At some point while you were explaining you had started crying, He sat up causing you to sit up as well. He grabbed your face, wiped your tears and stared deeply into your eyes. It felt like he was staring into your soul but you didn’t look away. After what feels like an eternity he finally spoke up and said “I don’t know how you could think all those awful things about yourself. You’re the most wonderful person I’ve ever met. Your kind, smart, compassionate, not to mention most beautiful person I’ve ever met. You’re not a burden to those around you, especially not me ever. Next time you feel like this, I want you to talk to me okay? I’m here to help you. I know you would do the same for me in a heartbeat so let me help you. I love you so much and I don’t want to lose you, you’re my whole world.” You were crying again but for the first time today they were happy tears.

“Thank you for always reminding me how loved I am. I love you so much Con,” you said smiling through the tears.

“I love you more Y/N/N,” he said, smiling sweetly at you. He gave you a tender kiss on the forehead and then said “You’ve had a long day we should get some sleep.”

“Yeah you’re right,” you said through a yawn. The two of you got cozy again, your head on Connor’s chest, his hands running through your hair. The sound of his heartbeat, the one he swore beat for only you, lulled you to sleep. The last thing you heard before you felt before you fell fully unconscious was a kiss being pressed to the top of your head.

#connor murphy #connor murphy fanfiction #Connor Murphy x Reader #connor murphy fanfic #connor murphy x you #dear evan hansen masterlist #dear evan hansen #dear evan hansen x reader #dear evan hansen fanfic #dear evan hansen x you #deh #deh movie #deh musical #x reader #Character x Reader #gender neutral reader

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laketaj24 · 4 years ago

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Roses and Iron: Geralt

Author’s Note: Alright here is the winner of the Poll fic form yesterday! Hope you enjoy!! Thank you so much for reading!! Let me know what you think!! Requests are open but I am slow! Shout out to @demivampirew for the gif!!

Pairings: Young!Geralt X Reader

Warnings: Smut

Masterlist

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You paced your room, your hands shook uneasily, and it was accompanied by the beat of your heart. Tonight was the night, the betrothal to a Witcher from the academy had been arranged from your father months ago, and tonight was the wedding. But, per his request, the affair was not grand, and the only people in attendance were the two of you.

“You will do well; this alliance is needed.” Your mother entered your room dressed in her gown. The roses garnished her black dress; the attire was typical for a family of your ranking—high Majesties of the Northern Realm. Black and red were the family’s colors. “There is worry on your face.”

“How will I know I am what he wants?’

“Men do not know what they desire until they have it. Turn.” She directed. Your mother resembled you; her strong features were all you, a soft jawline and almond-shaped eyes that spoke even when she didn’t. Her soft ochre skin balanced the depth of the black dress. She started to pull at your corset drawing it tighter.

“I do not understand why this alliance is even needed.”

“It is not for you to understand; it is only your path to do as you are directed and marry the young Witcher. Let us dress you and meet him.”

It didn’t take long for you to dress and enter the great hall. The Witchers had made their way into the hall and so had Geralt. Geralt stood in front of you with a poised demeanor and a smile. It looked genuine, and he looked nothing of The Witcher’s that stood behind him. His hair in dark curls that hit his back and his eyes crystal blue that only tinged with the amber of his kinsman. “High Majesty.” He said, bowing to you. “It is an honor to meet you.”

“And you.” You bowed, looking at him through the sheer red veil. “Geralt of Kaer Morhen.”

“Geralt is fine.”

“Are you both ready for the union.” The mage looked impatient; the incongruous pair was a waste of her time, you knew it, and she did as well. “Come forth.”

The low rumble of murmurs ceased as you two met the mage. Your heart no longer felt heavy; it pattered lightly against your chest as Geralt took your hand in his and walked you towards the mage. “Today, we are here join The Majestic High Elven Court of the North with Kaer Morhen. Before me stands Geralt, the youngest Witcher of Kaer Morhen and The high Majesty Y/N.” She pauses and takes your hand and his, placing them in the wooden bowl. “We dip their hands in the water, this ceremonial. This act washes away any disputes, bad blood, or malicious intent. This makes the union pure.”

The water was calm; you sloshed your fingers around it for a second and removed it, the trickles hit the wooden floor. “Nice.”

“You are a pure elf.” She smiled. “Your heart has good intentions, and surprisingly, so does the Witcher’s heart.” The mage exhaled. “Present the rings,” She pointed to her apprentices, and they came bearing the brilliantly silver rings. “Place these rings on the proper finger, as tradition would see fit the pearl in yours in white. Once defloration has occurred, the pearl will turn the color of roses, and this union shall be complete, and the alliance shall be recognized. May the spirits guide you.” She turned, and the murmurs reconvened.

Your mother appeared at your side. “It will be done by morning.” She smiled and turned to Geralt. “You two are free to leave. The ceremony has ended.”

It had no splendor like your brothers, no trumpets played, or flowers fell. They just dispersed, and you stood alone in the Great Hall with Geralt at your side. “Shall we retire?”

“So eager?’

“I have traveled for ten days.” Geralt added. “We can only sleep if you would like; I have no intentions of rushing you in this matter. It is your decision, but I am exhausted.” He stretched his hand to you, and you took it. “Our chambers are on the east end, from what I am told. Are you familiar?”

“I shall lead the way.”

The East End chambers had been yours before your brother had married, but when he deserted his position as King, he’d lost this wing, and it had become yours once more. You lead the way up the winding steps. The East Wing had been decorated for the event, rose petals sprinkled along the steps leading to the bedroom, and you did not want to sleep. You’d heard the tales of sex, how it could make a woman feel powerful or loved. You wanted both; you wanted to be worshipped even if you did not know what you were walking into.

Geralt looked at the bed; a smile covered his face as he unbuttoned the stuffy leather jacket he’d worn and shrugged out of it, hanging it on the bedpost and then taking a seat. “It is wonderful here; I slept on a stone bed at Kaer Morhen; anything is better than that.”

“I suppose.” You closed the door and looked at him. “Will you assist in undressing me.”

“It would be an honor.” He motioned you over to the bed with an amused smile on his face. Once in front of you, he started untying the corset and gently tugging the heavy dress down your body. “I find it odd that women go through such lengths.”

“You did not like my dress.”

“I loved it.” He rebutted. “But, does one really have to dress a rose to acknowledge its beauty? It is at its finest bare.”

“Perhaps that’s how I should present myself to you, like the rose I am.” It was a relief to feel the dress and the undergarments fall to the floor. You stepped out of the pool of clothing at your feet and then turned to face Geralt. “

Geralt’s eyes locked on you, “You’re a virgin.”

“I am.”

“So here you are before me, bare, beautiful, fragile. What am I to do with you?”

“Your worse.” You answered, placing your hands on his shoulders. “Please.”

Geralt is hesitant, moving you towards him, resting his hands on the nape of your ass. The pads of his fingers were rough, proof of his training he had yet to complete. “I do not know how to be gentle.”

“I wouldn’t expect you to.”

Geralt had not kissed you the entire evening; you hadn’t expected him to beings that you had only met a few hours prior. But right now, you craved for him to touch you, kiss you, and most importantly fuck you. He didn’t need you to vocalize your request, he met your lips with haste pulling you on top of him, allowing you to take the lead, and you did so eagerly. He positioned the two of you in the middle of the bed, and you started slow. You kissed his jawline, the one thing you had been looking at the entire day; you peppered the kisses until you met his soft lips, and then you bit him playfully.

Geralt reacted, nipping you back and cupping your mound; his fingers danced at the pillowed lips pushing them back, exposing the glistening pink flesh beneath the ochre brown. “Have you ever cum on your own fingers?”

“Every night this week.” You admitted.

“You have no need for that anymore.” Geralt’s index finger dipped into you, curling before it slipped out and then back in again. You were wet for him. He started to fuck with that finger, and then he added another, and you inhaled sharply. “Did it feel like this?”

“No,” You breathed.

“Better?”

You shook your head, and the small spasms started around his fingers. It never happened that quick for you. But usually, after it did, you were ready to sleep. You rested on his chest as the small orgasm took over. “That was great.”

Geralt chuckled and rolled you onto the bed. He stood up and began to shed the rest of his clothes, revealing the chiseled, lean body you knew was under the clothes. “We have only started, my dear rose.”

Geralt climber back on the bed and hovered over you. He was hard already, but curiosity got the best of you. You reached between his legs and gripped the thick shaft. He jumped in your hands. You were beneath him, adjusting the sizeable man atop of you and the feeling of his warm cock, stroking at your entrance. “Brace yourself.” He smiled as the tip slid into your entrance. “I swear I will not hurt you.”

It was pointless to respond to him, you spread your legs wider for him, and he took the queue and slowly pushed into you. The slight sting was tolerable at first, his girth stretched you for an inch, and he halted. “Keep going.” You wriggled beneath him.

“Impatient.” He laughed. He pulled out, leaving you empty, and then he pushed into you deeper. Your eyes snapped shut, and he kissed your lips, moving slowly and then pausing, allowing you to feel him once more. He was thick, and your body was adjusting, your pussy slickened, and you wanted him to not be gentle.

“Geralt.” You whined.

“I will give you what you want,” He groaned, pulling out and then back in nearly hilt deep this time.

Your breath was knocked from you for a second once he genuinely started to fuck you. Geralt’s strokes were deliberately planned for you to feel every inch of him, and at first, they were uncomfortable, bordering painful. However, the curve of his dick hit the right spot each time he pushed into you, and though it had the potential to feel great, you couldn’t help but focus on the pain of it all.

Your nails raked down his arms as your legs quivered around him, but Geralt did not stop. His hips clapped against yours, drilling you into the bed until you began to shake. Your eyes fluttered. What the fuck was happening? Still pain, but if he stopped, you felt you might perish. Your moans replaced the pained hisses from earlier. Mewls filled the room, and Geralt had found a pace that both suited you and allowed him to fuck you the way you both wanted. He lifted your body from the mattress bring your hips closer as he fucked into you, and then placed you on his thighs. You were upright, and he was deeper, still pounding into you.

“Can you take it like this?” He whispered in your ear.

The words were sensual; you answered with your body. You started to meet Geralt’s thrust, fuck pain, pain is what you wanted. You wrapped your arms around his neck and locked eyes with him once more. And then your body erupted in pleasure, your pussy spasmed, and he was soaked with a grin. “Fuck.” Your cum had gushed out on him, soaking the bed and shocking the hell out of you.

“You feel like fucking silk.” He growled. You shook, halting your movements and Geralt continued to fuck into you until you landed back on your back, almost hanging off the bed. His hips met yours over and over, and you continued to mewl. He lasted a few more strokes, spilling into you with a shutter and a cathartic moan that only made you want to again.

Henry Cavill Taglist: @oddsnendsfanfics @my-rosegold-soul @fallslikefeather @iloveyouyen @honeydulcewrites @thickemadame @taytayize123 @blackmissfrizzle @isthat-tyra98 @titty-teetee @yeet-me-out-tonight @inforapound @supernaturalvikingwhore @l-auteuse @alwaysadreamingoptimist @chaneajoyyy @october505 @boomhauer @sciapod @abrokencondomiswhyimalive @littlefreya @bianaguipa @therandomthoughtsofmsparker @therealcalicali @twistedcharismaaa @singeramg @angreav @magdelen69 @madbaddic7ed @pocimaginesaesthetics @ajspencer1892 @jovanaprime @zejess93 @sapphirescrolls @sparklemichele @justgrits @persephones24 @ieshaa96 @dangerous-like-a-loaded-pistol @mereka18 @cass-the-mess @angelic-kisses13 @sprinklesandsugarcubes @two-unbeatable-beaters @peakygroupie @sincerelysinister @rhys108 @madbaddic7ed @utterlyhopeful-fics @theemelanintrappp @ysmmsy @zealoushound @fandomfic-galore @a-dlv @littlebvbie @hellshedevil @kebabgirl67 @frozen-nipples @xxxkatxo @bichibibi @thecurlyintrovert @tigerlillyscorner @chiddybangchiddy @keiva1000 @namjoonswifeyy @amorestevens @sohoseb @amberangel112 @moonlacebeam

#laketa j writes #henry cavill fics #geralt x black!reader #geralt x y/n #geralt of riva #geralt x you #geralt the witcher #laketaj24 #geralt #Henry cavill

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mandoalorian · 3 years ago

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Borrowed Time [Din Djarin x F!Reader] SMUT

ੈ♡˳‧₊*: • Chapter 8: The Truth ✩࿐ ˚.✧

Summary: You are the princess of Mandalore, held hostage on your own planet by Moff Gideon and his army of Imperial troopers. Left with no choice, you send out a distress signal; a plea for protection— and who comes? None other than Din Djarin, a foundling of The Death Watch. He, by creed, is your sworn enemy. And where you have asked for his protection, he has been told by his mentor that he must marry you and gain the ability to restore Mandalore to its former glory.

Word Count: 2200>

Warnings: more angst and feelings! 18+ SMUT; unprotected p in v (wrap it before you tap it), f receiving oral, fingering… very soft sex andddd a praise kink because it’s Din’s first time giving oral :’)

AN: Please reblog to spread this around! It’s not showing up in tags! i think i’m still semi-shadow banned:(

Series Masterlist

Din didn’t say anything for a long time. He didn’t understand. Not the Manda’lor? How could that be possible? If you weren’t the Manda’lor, then... who were you? As if you were reading his thoughts, you closed your eyes and turned around so you were facing the brick wall behind you, and tried your very best to explain the truth. You had to at least make an attempt. You ignored the choked nervous knot in your throat. You couldn’t bear to look at him.

How could you ever even begin to explain this to him. You’d never spoken about what happened back on Mandalore to anyone. You’d kept it to yourself all this time. It was so painful. But you had to try.

“My mother was Duchess Satine Kryze, and I am, by technicality, the Princess of Mandalore. I always will be. When my mother died, fifteen years ago, I became heir to the throne. I became the Manda’lor, and... everything was fine. I had everything under control, and, dare I say, I was a good leader. Until one night, there was a planned attack by the Imperials on my city and they slaughtered everyone. They raided homes and killed children…” a single tear slipped down your cheek. “Moff Gideon came to see me. He wanted… the darksaber. So he had his troopers raid the palace and they found it. And once he wielded it, he became the rightful ruler of Mandalore. And, I still don’t have it back… I’ve-- I’ve never felt so helpless. And responsible for the murder of my people.”

You were crushed. You thought by admitting all of this, it would take the giant burden you’d been holding this entire time off your shoulders, but it didn’t. It only made you dread all the built up pain and anguish you had in your heart… for letting this happen and for lying to Din. You really had failed everyone around you, but most importantly, you’d failed yourself.

Bringing your hand to your wedding ring, you twiddled it around your finger and took a shaky exhale. “Din, I understand if you want nothing to do with me anymore. I can leave, and you’ll never see me again. I promise you that much. But I will get the darksaber back and I will be the rightful ruler of Mandalore. These were my people he killed. He stole it from me. And I won’t let the Imperial’s take anymore than they already have. Not without a fight.”

Compiling all the remaining bravery left in you, you turned back around to face Din and opened your eyes.

And your heart stopped.

His eyes were big and brown and sad. He had short, shaggy brown hair and a light stubble which grazed his jaw. His pink lips were parted slightly as he looked at you with his own eyes. No visor modifying his vision of you. This was raw, and completely him. He’d taken off his helmet.

You tried to ask him why, but no words came out.

“So that’s why the Imperials were chasing after you?” His jaw ticked but Maker, his voice without the helmet was as soft as silk. Rich and velvety.

He was handsome too. More handsome than you could’ve ever even imagined. In a rugged way, not in your typical Prince of Mandalore way. But you liked it a lot.

“Yes,” you swallowed thickly. “Moff Gideon imprisoned me in the palace and he never wanted me to leave. He made me promise to never tell anyone that he had the darksaber, because no doubt, any Mandalorian who found out the truth would venture after him to try and reclaim it for themselves. I was forced to live this lie. But I had to do something. That’s when I sent out the distress signal to coverts around the galaxy. That’s when you came for me, and helped me escape.”

Din tried his hardest to process your words. It… made sense. His gaze fell from your face and he looked down at the ground. He looked so sad and your heart ached. If there was a way you could fix this, you were pretty sure you’d do anything. In that very moment, you didn’t even care about the Mandalorian throne or the darksaber. You just cared about Din.

“Din, I’m so sorry.” you began, preparing to fully beg for his forgiveness, but before you could say anymore, his lips came crashing into yours.

He didn’t have anything to say to you, really. He was just so enamoured by you, that he didn’t care. You could lie to him a million times over and he’d forgive you, because you were just too perfect. You were, without a doubt, the most beautiful woman he’d ever seen. And he loved you.

He should be mad, he knew that much. But he couldn’t bring himself to hate you when all he could think about was just how beautiful your lips were. The entire time you were talking, he was fighting the urge to kiss you. Until finally, he just couldn’t resist anymore.

His mouth was soft and fit perfectly against yours. Your eyes snapped shut and a surprised moan fell from your lips as he took you in his arms and held you. You loved the way it felt… his hands on your body and caressing your skin. Was this… the first time he’d kissed? He was so passionate yet gentle, and Maker, you didn’t want it to end. He was absolutely gorgeous, and such an amazing kisser. When you thought he was going to break away, you raised your hands to his face and cupped his cheeks, swiping your tongue over his lower lip and signalling for him to continue the kiss. He did so, and you opened your mouth, granting him deeper access.

A minute or so later, when the both of you were practically gasping for breath, he pulled off you and rested his forehead against yours. If he was unsure about his feelings before, he knew for certain now.

“We’ll have to leave at dawn,” Din said eventually, huffing and looking into your eyes. His hands were still planted firmly on your hips and he nudged his nose against yours. “There’ll be less Imps around, the earlier we leave.”

You were baffled. “I don’t… I don’t understand.”

“We’re getting the darksaber back,” he confirmed. “You’re getting the darksaber back. You are the rightful ruler of Mandalore.”

You couldn’t believe it. He still wanted to help you, even after admitting to him that you’d been lying. He no longer had a duty to protect you, and yet he was doing this not because he had to, but because he wanted to.

“Are you sure?” you gasped, completely exasperated. “Are you sure you still want to help me?”

Din nodded his head wordlessly before kissing you again. “We should rest before our escape tomorrow,” Din breathed. “I have a room here.”

“Take me.” you begged, curling your body into his.

Din’s room at the covert was no different to the many other rooms that were habited by other Mandalorians. It was a small boxy room with a bed in the corner. At least it was a real bed though, and not Din’s poor excuse for a bed back on the Crest. He closed the door behind him and turned on the light, although it wasn’t bright whatsoever. It barely illuminated the room in this dull, amber colour, but it was just enough to cast your shadows on the wall.

You gulped, not tearing your eyes from him once. “I think you’re very handsome,” you blurted out, smiling when you noticed a rosy blush cross Din’s cheeks. “And I think it’s a real shame that you have to hide your face. I just know that those brown eyes could charm you out of trouble.”

Din chuckled nervously. “I think you’re very pretty too,” he said. “But you probably hear that a lot.”

You shook your head, the smile never leaving your lips once. “No.”

When Din kissed you, it felt like heaven. As the moment became more and more heated, both of you ended up undressing, and discarding your clothing and his armour into a pile on the floor.

Din carefully laid you down on his bed and hovered over you, planting kisses down your neck, along your collarbones and down your chest. He brought his hand over to your breasts and began with giving them a few experimental squeezes. He brushed his thumb over your hardening nipple and pinched it, earning a moan of pleasure from you.

Not taking his lips from yours, he dropped his hand down your body and to the hem of your panties, dipping his finger under the waistband and feeling just how wet you’d already become. He chuckled to himself, his thick and deft index finger tracing quick and tight circles across your clit. You arched your back into him, a foggy haze crossing your vision as he worked you into a complete state of euphoria.

You chanted his name like it was a prayer, caressing his biceps and holding onto him. After he drew out your first orgasm, he tapped on your thigh. You lifted up your ass so he could pull down your panties and take them off completely. You were an absolute sight to behold, there was no denying that. Your folds were slick with your arousal and Din done everything he could to contain himself. Licking his lips, he knelt down between your legs and began to lap his tongue around your bundle of nerves, even sucking occasionally on your sweet spot.

“Does-- does that feel good?” Din asked, briefly pausing just before you were about to cum again. Your legs were shaking with pleasure and Din just wanted to make sure you were alright. “I’m-- I’ve never done this before.” he confessed.

“Oral?” you asked breathlessly, rolling your head into the pillow.

“Mhm,” he confirmed, nibbling and pressing lovebites into the soft flesh of your thighs. “Never took off my helmet.”

You moaned something incoherent when the curve of his nose rubbed against your clit and you felt the warmth of his breath fan over your core.

“It’s good Din, so good,” you sighed longingly. “You’re doing so good. Please don’t stop.”

So Din kept at it until eventually you were a heaving, quivering mess, and he drove out your second orgasm. When he pulled away from you, a trail of his saliva pulled between your wet cunt and his lips, but he immediately licked himself clean and leaned over your body so he could kiss you again. The way you could taste yourself on his mouth felt so erotic.

You pulled his hard and leaking cock from the confines of his underwear and began to pump at his length. He was hot and heavy, and somehow, he was even better than you had imagined. Even as you stroked him, you yearned for him, and you could feel your cunt clench around nothing as you wished for him to fuck you already.

Din loved how you were a needy, squirming mess beneath him. He positioned himself at your entrance and slowly pushed his engorged tip inside of you, taking a few moments to allow you to adjust to his length. The wet noises as he thrusted into you were lewd and obscenely loud, and if you were with anyone else you might’ve felt embarrassed -- but as Din built up his rhythm and held on to your hips, you couldn’t even think straight enough to feel embarrassed.

“Din,” you cried out, letting your fingers curl in his brown locks of hair. “Oh Din.”

His own hips began to stutter and with a loud gasp, you felt his cock convulse inside of you and a spurt of his creamy hot seed rope your walls.

Din let himself soften inside of you as he caught his breath, eventually rolling off you and laying by your side. He wrapped his arms around you and spooned you, whispering sweet nothings into your ear until eventually, you fell asleep in his arms.

“You will reclaim Mandalore,” he whispered, pressing a chaste kiss to your forehead. “I promise.”

_________________________________________

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tarithenurse · 3 years ago

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Accidental Partners - 6

Fandom: MCU Pairing: Sam Wilson & fem!reader Contents: Cussing, description of nightmares, change in PoV. A/N: Just a little something inspired by a @writing-prompt-s prompt: “Two random strangers are in couples therapy together. They both decide to pretend they’re a couple, despite having met each other two minutes ago”.

6. The long wait

Your life has turned into a loading screen. All you can do is sit and stare until someone else does something or tells you to act. Like a puppet.

Still, you know you could be worse off. Restricted to the house and the immediate surroundings, the dream of going sailing has been put on halt...but you’re comfortable in your house arrest – food is great and there is company if you want it.

It has taken you a week to optimize the computer while trying to be sneaky. The keyword being “sneaky”. Well, the actual keyword being “trying”: one night while working on it, the little of the kids found you (he couldn’t sleep) and even though you got him to promise to be quiet...well, kids are kids and he was excited about the prospect of a better PC and so he over-spoke a few days later.

“One of the conditions was ‘no access to any type of computer’...rings a bell?” Sam sighs afterwards when he’s caught up with you by the willow.

“But I stayed off the internet! Isn’t that the point?”

“No!” He pauses at his own answer. “Well, yes...but not just. A judge won’t care whether you were playing minesweeper or hacking into the Pentagon. They hear ‘computer’ and they’ll think you’ve done something else bad.”

“Bad? ’Something else bad’?!” you gasp.

“You know what I mean...” Leaning against the tree, he rubs his neck for a moment. “Listen, I know what you did was amazing and we’ve only just started dealing with it but I want to make sure that they’ve got nothing to pin on you that can weigh negatively. Makes sense?”

It does. But you miss your laptop and more importantly, you miss something to do. “But how am I supposed to prepare for anything like a trial or whatever?”

...and that’s how you ended up with musty old law books and a stack of transcripts of your own work.

...

There’s a crick in your neck and your left arm’s asleep as it’s tugged between your cheek and the book lying open on the table. Oooow. Carefully, you pull yourself free and test the joints of shoulders and elbows only to find then stiff and uncooperative. Glancing at the clock of the TV, you can see it’s almost four in the morning and reason that it probably is a good idea to go to bed. But something just woke me. Just then, a hand lands on your shoulder: light and warm, utterly scary, and making you jump in the chair.

“Sorry,” Sam says. He’s wearing a worn t-shirt and boxers and your bleary eyes are roving slowly up to his face. “Didn’t wanna scare you but uhmm maybe you should get some proper rest instead of sleeping in the books?”

“Hmmm-m,” you acknowledge with a heavy nod.

As you start to bunch the pages together, Sam stops you with a gentle hand. “Just let it be, babe.”

He guides you up to the room you’ve taken over after Barnes left for a so-called mission and it’s not until you’re lying in the bed that you realize that it’s the second time he’s called you by a nickname. An endearment at that.

“Sam?” you call out softly for him, thinking that maybe he hasn’t closed the door yet but there is no answer.

...

You don’t get to ask Sam the next day because he’s upped and left on a mission before you’re even awake, leaving you to tamper down the tight anxiety that suddenly blooms in your gut. In his place is a straight lipped agent that spends most of his time adjusting the tie of his black suit or polishing the sunglasses...that is until Sarah decides that there can’t be any freeloaders and guilt trips him into doing some of the chores that Sam normally would take care of.

One day turns into one week, one agent into a rotation of three, and you feel like screaming.

Listening to the TV or reading the newspaper is the only way for you to feel there’s a world outside your comfortable prison. You miss your computer and the availability of information and news, miss the personas you’ve come to consider as friends even though you’ve never seen them in your real life. How could you? They’re all over the world and some, though not most, have the same hunger that you have: the need to set some things right in a crooked world. But you don’t dare to go near the PC. Don’t even trust yourself to be around the boys when they’re talking about things from the online world but leave the room quietly.

The ankle monitor chafes on the humid days, making it almost unbearable to walk around with after an hour. More often than not, you spend time soaking your feet in a bucket of cold water or your legs up, hands busied with preparing something for the dinner in the evening. You need something to do. Something to keep your hands occupied now that the fingers can’t dance over the keyboard.

Mostly you need a way to avoid going crazy with worry.

“They aren’t gonna peel themselves,” Sarah’s voice calls you back to earth and you find yourself still clutching the same potato you picked up five minutes ago.

“Sorry.”

She grunts something uncommitted and disappears into the house again only to come back a bit later with a glass of ice tea. “What’s up?”

Where to start? You want to complain about your situation...but you did bring it upon yourself and you’ve almost accepted that by now. And to be fair, things could be worse. “Nothing...just bored, I guess.”

“Okay,” she nods, pushing a few stray leaves towards the edge of the porch.

Somewhere out on the road the school bus drops off two boys and you hear them laugh and yell as they rush towards the house. The current agent adjusts her tie over by the willow – far enough away not to hear a discreet chat, but close enough to keep an eye on you.

“You look the way I feel when Sam and Bucky are off,” your slightly involuntary host comments.

“I’m sorry wait what nooo,” you sputter, earning a knowing smirk.

Trust is...truth is she’s right. You worry about the guy. Guys. Definitely plural. Really, is it normal to be gone for that long? To not send any word back home that he’s okay. They are okay...they. Both of them. Not just Sam.

“I’d like to say it gets easier,” Sarah offers with a gentle smile that turns into a grimace, “but it doesn’t. I used to just have to worry about one idiot and now they’re two, riling each other up like little kids.”

Her actual kids have dropped their backpacks and are engaging in their favourite pastime activity these days: make the agent smile.

“I’m not worried about them,” you claim, heart clenching at the idea of Sam getting hurt out there somewhere.

“Sure you’re not...and I’m Oprah.”

...

You can’t sleep that night, the cicadas are too noisy and it’s too humid...and every time you do dose off, you see the charming, gap-toothed smile broken and bloodied.

Instead of wrestling with your nightmares in bed, you tiptoe out the room and past the current agent that’s nodding over their cellphone. If only I had five minutes with that thing! But no, you know better than to risk anything by swiping it.

Treading softly down the chairs, you avoid the step that creaks and make it all the way onto the porch where you plop down on the porch swing.

The air is lighter out here and lightning bugs are zigzagging underneath the trees. High above, the moon is hanging with its crescent to cast a bit of glow down on the world below but it’s not enough to create more than deep or deeper shadows.

...

You must have managed to doze off because you wake with a start at the sound of creaking. Several of the planks in the porch could use replacing and it’s on the to-do list...you just haven’t gotten around to it yet. Now it serves as an alert to the constant presence of one of the agents that have been tasked with watching you in Sam’s absence.

“Are you okay?” the agent asks in a gentle whisper.

You answer him with a nod. “Was just too stuffy indoors, y’know?”

“Be happy you’re not required to wear a suit and tie,” he sighs.

“I’m not gonna rat on you if you don’t.”

You can see him consider for a moment before the hand slowly rises to loosen the knot a few inches. “Thank you. I’ll...give you some time alone if you want it?” He doesn’t wait for verification before he slips back inside.

Lying back on the porch swing, you allow the gentle rocking to lull you back into a light sleep. It’s one that’s softened by images you adore of dark eyes with golden shimmers and wide smiles but equally twisted with the continuous nagging of what will happen later.

It’s a thought that occupies you as much as the predicament you face in general – as if it wasn’t enough to be on trial for spilling the truth a bit. But you can’t help shake the feeling that even if everything works out, you’ll still end up sad and alone. It’s not something you’ve worried about before...hell, you know you’ll still have your friends but a part of you want one specific person to be included and really, what are the odds of that?

I’m a pining idiot, you conclude, and I should know better. It’s only people in books and movies that get the happy ever after.

... Sam ...

It’s early morning, the sun barely peeking above the horizon, when they come home. Tired. Smelly. But happy with the result of the mission. Neither he nor Bucky have a need to say anything as they trudge down the road from where they got dropped off this time.

It’ll be good so see Sarah and the kids, Sam thinks, but it’s the image of you that floats in his mind until he pushes it away forcefully.

Hopefully Bucky’s just thinking happily about showers but the smirk on his lips says something else that Sam doesn’t want to consider all too often. So what if his sister and reluctant friend hook up? They’re adults! It’s still an odd thought though and he’s not sure who he’s the most concerned for.

A thin haze of dew is hanging in the air by the time the men reach the porch and spot the lone figure lying on the porch swing, curled up in a fetus position and hands tucked under the cheek. They stop at the sight of you but then Bucky pats his friend on the shoulder and tiptoes past, adeptly avoiding the creaky boards.

Oh man, she’s gorgeous. Sam doesn’t want to admit it, but once the thought has flashed through his brain, he can’t deny it.

Goosebumps are peppering your arms and legs that your sleepwear can’t cover completely. Somehow, you’ve managed to wrap yourself so tightly together that you only take up half of the porch swing, and he can’t help worrying that it must be from the only morning chill – although the night has been warm, the morning always lend a bit of needed refreshment – and he steps carefully over to the box with blankets, grabbing one to spread over you and as he does, he has to lean in close...close enough to smell the scent that he hadn’t realized he’s missed while he was gone.

But then the blanket is covering you and Sam has to pull away or it’d be weird. He doesn’t want weird. No...it’d have to be done right if ever...

#Sam Wilson #Accidental Partners 6 #Sam wilson x reader #sam wilson x y/n #Sam captain america wilson #fanfic #fanfiction #MCU fandom #marvel cinematic universe #MCU #writing #wip #Sam wilson love #Sam wilson series #captain america and the winter soldier #Sam wilson pining

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supernaturalgirl20 · 3 years ago

Text

Addicted to You

Pairings: Dave York x reader

Warnings: Smut 18+ explicit, p in v smut, little bit of dark Dave, unhealthy relationships, angst, fluff if you squint.

Summary: your an addict and he is your drug! Will you ever give him up?

A/N: ok so this is purely self indulgent. I just finished sex/life and it got me thinking about our favourite murder daddy!Dave. I’m sorry (no I’m not 😏)

*comments and reblogs really appreciated*

Addiction, the inability to stop using substances or engaging in behaviour that is harmful both psychologically and physically.

You knew that’s what he was and yet you still came when he called. He had worked his way into every aspect of your life, and you didn’t know how to let go.

There was a history between you, one that ran so deep you would always be connected. For one, you knew what he really did, you were the only one who knew. He trusted you, trusted you with his secrets, with his life and most importantly his heart. When you’d dated it was chaotic, it was reckless, it was hot. You had bared your soul to him, given him every part of you. Then he was gone.

It became a cycle constantly repeating itself over and over. Friends told you enough was enough. He was no good for you, it was unhealthy what you both had. They never understood.

****

Sex was amazing, out of this world. That had never been a problem. You would both fuck whenever and wherever you could. Sometimes you’d make a game of it, flirt with others, making sure the other was watching. You always won those games. He could never stand to see another mans hands on you. He would bring you into the bathroom, lock the door, and fuck you against the wall. It was rough, it was raw and it was possessive. “It’s so hot watching other men want you so bad, knowing your mine”.

There was only one problem, you loved him. He had loved you too. Or at least you think he did. He was never good with emotions. Maybe he did love you, but couldn’t show it. Maybe, he didn’t love you at all.

****

He’s married now. Two kids. Something he had never given you, yet when his name flashes across your screen, you still answer. You meet in cheap motels and he fucks you in ways he can’t with his wife. His favourite, fucking you from behind, hard and fast until he pulls you by the hair towards him. He wraps his arm around your waist and squeezes your breast. He tells you, your his and no one else can have you, that he will leave her, Carol. He says it with such conviction you believe him, every…damn….time. Not anymore!

****

Laying naked in bed after another vigorous round of fucking, Dave is asleep. It’s when he seems at his most peaceful. You watch him, longing for a life you know you’ll never have. Running your fingers along his jaw, he slowly begins to wake.

“What time is it?”

“After 4.”

The change is sudden, you’d barely notice if you didn’t know him like you do. Gone is the Dave you know, now it’s back to business as usual.

“I need to go.”

He throws the covers off him and stands, giving you a view of his muscular ass. He stretches, giving you time to move from the bed and snake your arms around his form.

“Do you have to go? Can’t you just stay this once?” You kiss a trail up his back, your hands moving from his stomach down towards his semi erect penis. Just as your fingers wrap around his length, he grabs your wrist and pushes it away.

“I can’t. We’ve been over this.”

Moving around him so you are face to face.

“Please, I only want one night, one night where your mine!”

His brown eyes soften as he looks at you. He brings his hand to your face and tilts your chin towards him. He kisses you and it’s so soft and gentle.

“I am yours.”

“No your not, you were once, but not now.”

“You know I don’t love her, it’s all a front, a lie.”

“Is it though? Then why have kids? When I wanted your baby you said you never wanted children.”

“I had to, it would have looked suspicious.”

“No it wouldn’t, you could say you can’t have children.”

“I’m not bringing my girls into this.” You could hear in anger in his tone. He was slipping through your fingers, you could feel it.

“Dave please, if you love me, even a little, please just stay tonight.” You can see the war raging in his eyes, hoping his love for you will win out. It never does. He pushes past you into the bathroom.

“I can’t.”

Sobs threaten to escape but you hold them back as you gather your things. Your dressed and at the door when he comes out.

“What are you doing, I’ve paid for the night, you can stay.”

“No! I’m done, we’re done.”

He snickers, putting his watch on.

“Your like a broken record baby. How many times is this now?”

“You don’t get to laugh at me Dave. I’ve loved you practically all my life, kept your secrets. I wanted a life with you, a family, one that wasn’t just for show. You wouldn’t give it to me, you gave it to her instead. I hate you for that.”

“No you don’t. You said it yourself, your in love with me.” He puts on his suit jacket, “same time next week?”

“You don’t get it, do you, I’m done. No more calling me when you want a good fuck, no more patching you up after a rough mission, it’s over. You’ve made your choice very clear and I can’t wait for you anymore.”

Dave stands there staring at you, for the first time in years, you can’t read him. He stalks towards you, grabs you around the neck, pinning you to the door.

“What makes you think I’ll let you go, huh. Your mine remember?”

“If you ever cared for me at all, let me go, let me have the life I want, the one you won’t give me,please baby.”

He relaxes his hold on you, kisses you passionately on the lips.

“If it’s what you really want?”

Your holding back the tears now. “It is.”

“Then go”.

You kiss him delicately on the lips before running out the door.

He watches you drive away in your car. She’ll be back, same time next week.

Tagging the usual and some who might be interested:

@lunaserenade @day-off-inkyoto @seasonschange-butpeopledont @librariantothejedi @anaaaispunk @loserrlauraa @javierpinme @thorins-queen-of-erebor @elinedjarin @maievdenoir @kirsteng42 @danniburgh @pascal-rascal424 @dihra-vesa @ikinmahlen @heythere-mel

#dave york x reader #dave york imagine #pedro pascal #pedro pascal x reader #dave york fanfiction

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rkived · 4 years ago

Text

━ CHASING PAVEMENTS 03 | JJK

↳ PAIRING: dad!jk/married!jk/bff!jk x reader

↳ GENRE/TAGS: f2l, angst, unrequited feelings, cheating, future smut

↳ WARNINGS: (for this chapter) time jumps, mention of divorce, blood mention ((but like nothing serious)), forced kisses, just sad stuff like this is sad guys lol

↳ WORD COUNT: 8.6k

↳ EXCERPT: ‘‘Jungkook doesn’t want to think this is the end, maybe it’s that stupid voice inside his head that always holds on to things that he knows he should let go of. But he can’t just let go of this and move on. He doesn’t remember what life was like before you and he sure as hell does not want to know what it’ll be like without you.’’

↳ A/N: getting this chapter out has been ((a pain in the ass)) tough !! & cp was supposed to end with this chapter but that was not realistic at all lmao but i do hope u like this n i’ll try to get pt4 quickly as possible <3 thx

01 | 02 | 03 | 04

‘‘Okay everyone, let’s switch to the upward facing dog!’’

You really don’t want to be here. There’s a lot of stuff running through your head right now that are more important than focusing on yoga positions. You wish you were thinking about grocery shopping or paying that month’s bills.

Instead, you’re still stuck on the downward facing dog as your mind tells you you’re an idiot, a homewrecker and most importantly, a terrible friend.

‘‘Y/N, upward facing dog!’’ The instructor, Namjoon, reminds you with a gentle smile as he notices you haven’t switched positions like the rest of the class. You nod and smoothly place your body as he had taught in the classes before.

The only reason why you came to your Saturday morning yoga class was because even with all that happened last night, you wanted to feel a sense of normality. Like you’re capable of going on about your life like nothing had happened.

That’s selfish and stupid because as much as you tried, every single moment since you woke up revolved around last night.

From the moment you opened your eyes, noticing Sunhi wasn’t sleeping next to you, snuggled into your chest like you had last remembered her to be before she fell asleep and you following soon after.

And as your heart beat faster at the thought of finding her in her dad’s arms instead, watching Saturday morning cartoons on the T.V in your living room; you instead found the place neat and tidy. The messy pillows on your couch where placed like they hadn’t even been moved to begin with, like no one besides you had been in the apartment the night before.

Somehow he managed to do all of this without you even noticing. You wondered at what time he woke up, cleaned up, took Sunhi without making any fuss and left, all before your 7 AM alarm could wake you up.

He even made you breakfast too. Some eggs, bacon and toast.

‘‘Y/N, your legs are touching the mat.’’ Namjoon notes as he stands in front of you, ‘‘Let’s focus, okay?’’

You nod once again, though this time a little more embarrassed. If only you could explain to your instructor why you’re so distracted.

No messages either. No text explaining why he had to leave so early. No sticky note placed on your fridge door about how he made you breakfast. No slight shake to your sleeping body to let you know that he’d be taking Sunhi. Nothing.

Would’ve you liked that, though?

You could say yes because he’s your friend and it’s only fair since you took care of his daughter the night before.

But it’s not right, because friends don’t kiss each other, let alone the way you had let him kiss you and touch you while his daughter slept in your room and his wife waited for both of them at home.

There was a war going on inside you between your brain and your heart.

Your heart, being a weak ass bitch, was telling you about how exciting everything was. How nice it felt to have Jungkook tell you that he wanted to be with you, that he no longer felt happy with his wife, how perfectly his lips encaptured your own and how you could still feel them on you.

But your brain, obviously being the logical one between the two, reminded you about how wrong it was. You had never wanted to be placed in a position of being ‘‘the other woman’’. That even though you might not like Jiwoo and had spent years hoping your friend would someday wake up and realize this too, this didn’t feel right.

‘‘Alright, let’s drink some water now.’’ Namjoon announces, clasping his hands together and showing off that dimple that most ─if not all─ of the students went heart eyes over.

You take the time to check your phone instead, you don’t need the water because you didn’t do shit anyway. There’s no text from Minji, who you’re scared will somehow, by the grace of everything that’s holy, find out about what you did. No text from Jungkook either and you’re wondering why he hasn’t bothered to send one.

Instead, there’s a text from Taehyung and you mutter a curse.

[8:34 AM] Taehyung: hey y/n! i’m sure you’re in your yoga class rn but i wanted to see if maybe you’d be up for lunch at my place? i’ll try and cook something nice :)

Ah, of course that throughout all of this you forgot about Taehyung.

The sweet guy who had stuck around only for you to pay him back by kissing your best friend, the one Taehyung had to pretend wasn’t bothered by his interruption that night a few weeks ago.

God, you do have a way to fuck things up for yourself.

You don’t know how long you stood there thinking what to reply to him, but it definitely was for a few minutes because you only came back to reality once you heard your name being called once by the instructor.

‘‘Y/N,’’ Namjoon repeats and you look over at him with a puzzled look, ‘‘we’re starting again, if you’d like to join us.’’ There’s that smile again. Bless his patience, you wonder if he’s actually this calm because of yoga or he’s just really good at pretending.

You look back down at your phone, the screen displaying a text that’s still waiting to be replied to.

‘‘I uhm─I gotta go, sorry.’’ You quickly reply, making Namjoon look at you with wide eyes, but he makes no effort to stop you either.

And as quickly as you can, you collect your belongings before you’re heading out the door without saying goodbye.

Either you quit yoga altogether or just apologize to Namjoon like a grownup next Saturday. Whatever it is, you’re not thinking about what decision to make about your little extracurricular right now.

There’s only so much you can handle at a time.

Jungkook is lucky that Jiwoo works Saturday mornings because with her away, he’s able to enter his house without having to sneak in.

He opens the door wide, making way for him and a slightly awake Sunhi in his arms. He drops the keys on the counter without caring about the noise it makes. He doesn’t even have to pretend like he’s walking on glass, his boots are allowed to hit the wooden floor without a care in the world.

The place doesn’t look much different from what he had left it like the day before. There’s only a dirty glass on the sink, a product of Jiwoo’s daily breakfast smoothies and since she’s always in a rush she never has time to clean it up.

‘‘Are you still sleepy, pumpkin?’’ he quietly asks his daughter and she nods, he doesn’t blame her since he’s the one who woke her up at 6 AM. ‘‘Alright, I’ll take you to your bed,” he says, a kiss on her head following shortly after.

He wonders if Jiwoo enjoyed herself last night. No daughter and no husband, sounds like an ideal night for her. It’s not like she was worried about their whereabouts either, considering she hadn’t even bothered to text him wondering why they hadn’t come home.

If Jungkook’s supposed to feel guilty, he isn’t.

He’s heard stories before about how there’s a voice in your head constantly reminding you about what you did and how wrong it is. That he’ll be unable to sleep knowing he cheated on his wife while she lies next to him. That he won’t be able to look at her again without feeling remorse all over him.

And when Jiwoo returns home at noon, there’s none of that at all. He offers her a nod of acknowledgement once she enters the living room to find him sitting with his laptop, watching through old videos that he took years back.

She puts her index finger up, telling him to give her a minute. She’s on a phone call with a friend of hers that Jungkook can only conclude is Hyeri, who he probably met at some point but can’t remember what her face looked like.

‘‘I know! Like, why do you have to be such a bitch about it? We get that you’re sucking the boss’s dick in private, so you might as well─’’

Jiwoo’s voice is too distracting and so, Jungkook places his earphones in to hear what this video’s audio is about. Once he does, he hits play and the audio is loud enough to drown out Jiwoo’s whining.

‘‘Guess who came to see you, Pumpkin?’’

Jungkook gasps as he remembers this was part of a series of videos he was supposed to show Sunhi once she was old enough to understand them. He recorded a few until he was drowning in work to even grab his camera again. It saddens him that he wasn’t able to continue.

He decides he’ll show them to her later because right now Sunhi is too busy playing with her dolls inside her room to even pay attention to him.

‘‘It’s auntie Y/N! And she came bearing gifts,’’ Jungkook smiles, switching the focus on you ‘‘is that a Fisher Price Taco Tuesday toy set that I see?’’ he wonders in a fake curious tone as you look at him with narrowed eyes ‘‘I wonder how she knew you wanted that, Sunhi. It’s not like your dad had it on his Amazon wishlist or anything.’’

‘‘Very funny.’’ You mumble, handing him the toys so you could go ahead and grab a tiny three-month-old Sunhi from the bed ‘‘Aren’t you the cutest little bean in this entire world? Aren’t you?’’ you coo at the little girl, who looks at you with wide eyes and you’re forced to blink a couple of times because she looks just like him.

‘‘Of course she is, she’s my spitting image!’’ Jungkook confirms your thought as he grabs Sunhi’s cheek gently with his fingers and squeezes, making the baby giggle.

You side-eye him and then focus your attention back on the baby in your hands, ‘‘No, you’re not, Sunhi. Your daddy is not cute at all.’’

‘‘You’re gonna make me put this camera down and have a discussion about this.’’

Jungkook chuckles at the footage, noticing how he made you smile because of his comment. The video isn’t long, it’s mostly you cooing to a then tiny Sunhi, giggling at the way you would nuzzle your nose into her belly as Jungkook laughed behind the camera.

‘‘Jungkook, look at her!’’ You practically squeal as Sunhi grabs your thumb with her little hand ‘‘Oh my gosh, I think I’m gonna cry.’’

He laughs as he does a close-up of his daughter holding on to your finger, until he hears the little sniffle you let out and the camera is now focused on you silently wiping a tear away.

‘‘Wait, you’re actually crying?’’ Jungkook asks in disbelief and you turn to look at him to find the lens focused on you ‘‘Sunhi, you’re Auntie Y/N loves you so much that she’s crying! How cute.’’

‘‘You’re so dumb, seriously.’’ you mumble with a frown, going back to gawking at the baby still holding on to your thumb.

Jungkook sighs, ‘‘I’m gonna have to bleep that out, y’know?’’

You laugh and shrug your shoulders, caressing Sunhi’s stomach. Jungkook whispers ‘cute’, so soft that you’re unable to hear it.

Once it ends, Jungkook is able to see his smiling face as it reflects on the black screen and it’s only then he realized he’d been grinning the whole time. Now his ears are filled with Jiwoo talking over the phone and his smile goes back to a straight line.

Jungkook closes the video and clicks on the next one, hoping that it’s one that involves you as well. He’s unable to press play because Jiwoo is suddenly standing in front of him, arms crossed and she’s no longer talking on her phone.

‘‘Yes?’’ He asks, removing an earbud to show her she has his full attention.

‘‘So, where were you last night?’’

Jungkook’s slightly surprised that she cares. He tends to forget there’s still some humanity left in her after all, ‘‘At Y/N’s.’’ he answers with a shrug, eyes going back to stare at the screen of his laptop.

Jiwoo scoffs and he’s forced to look at her again, eyebrow slightly raised. He hopes she doesn’t start because it’s too early and it’s a Saturday. But Jiwoo doesn’t like taking breaks like he does.

‘‘I thought you said that she wasn’t going to be able to take care of Sunhi on Fridays.’’ There’s bitterness in her tone, ‘‘so, what were you doing there?’’

Jungkook understands where Jiwoo’s curiosity comes from, but it’s strange. She’s never been the type to ask where he’s been, what he’s doing with Sunhi while she’s not around ─which is practically all the time─ and doesn’t care for your business either.

‘‘I just stopped by.’’ Jungkook mutters, stroking the nape of his neck in an attempt to not seem suspicious, ‘‘We hung out and Sunhi fell asleep, she didn’t wanna come back home.’’

And that’s true, Jiwoo narrows her eyes at him as if she’s debating whether or not to believe him and the excuse of their sleeping daughter. She doesn’t know Sunhi that well to conclude if it’s possible or not.

‘‘And what, did you all three sleep together in the same bed? Playing family, maybe?’’

Jungkook looks at her in disbelief. This is a first.

‘‘What?’’ Is all he’s able to muster because he’s genuinely shocked at her accusation.

Jiwoo rolls her eyes, ‘‘Oh, please. Like I’m going to buy that hanging out bullshit.’’ Jungkook looks like a deer stuck in headlights and she chuckles, ‘‘Is what I give to you not enough?’’

‘‘I─what are you on about?’’

He figures this is her picking a fight because he wasn’t around yesterday to attend her needs like he usually does every Friday night. But Jungkook’s mind is quick to remind him of what he did and it’d be really ironic if he denies Jiwoo’s accusations, that for the first time are actually true.

‘‘I carried around that girl for nine months, ruined my body because of her, all for you to pick someone else over me?’’ Jiwoo’s voice is raised a little higher and Jungkook can’t help but look over at Sunhi’s bedroom door and hope his daughter is not listening to anything coming from the living room. ‘‘I knew I should’ve never trusted her, I always knew your friendship with her was fucking weird.’’

Jungkook doesn’t want to raise his voice either. It’s not going to get them anywhere. But he can’t stand the way she’s speaking about his daughter and you, she’s never crossed those boundaries before.

‘‘Are you insane? How can you talk about your daughter like she’s nothing?’’ Jungkook spats out, ‘‘I’ve always been thankful for what you did, I know the shit you went through to bring her into this world.’’

But Jiwoo doesn’t care about how loud she’s being, ‘‘You’re so thankful you pay me back by fucking your best friend? While I’m alone over here waiting for you to come back?’’

Jungkook has to take a deep breath and close his eyes for a second, before he loses it.

He clears his throat, ‘‘Jiwoo, I have always chosen you. Always. I did back when I was a sophomore, I did it when I asked you to marry me, and I did it when I chose you to be the mother of my children. So, I don’t know what─’’

‘‘I don’t give a flying fuck if you chose me! I was supposed to be all of that either way, Jungkook.’’ She interjects.

Was she, though? Of course, she was his girlfriend then. It would make sense that she’d be the one to end up marrying him, having his kids and living the happy life everyone guaranteed he’d live alongside her.

But he hasn’t been thinking about the choices he ended up taking back then. Instead, he’s been wondering about the ‘what if’s and Jiwoo isn’t in any of them.

Jungkook’s been daydreaming for months now about how different his life would’ve turned out if he had never asked the pretty girl in his class all those years back and instead had focused his attention somewhere else. Or someone else..

‘‘Are you going to answer me?’’ Jiwoo’s stern voice brings him back to the reality he hates, ‘‘Were you going to pick me or was I a second choice?’’ She slowly asks, giving him an opportunity to digest every single word she spoke.

‘‘You weren’t a second choice,’’ he mumbles and his gaze has faltered and instead focused back on the screen of his laptop. Clicking on a video randomly, trying to distract himself from the situation at hand. Hoping that whatever he says is enough for Jiwoo to leave him alone.

It doesn’t help that the video automatically plays and it’s you on the first frame, a big smile as you hold Sunhi towards the camera, making her wiggle in your arms.

What if.

‘‘Show me that you love me, then.’’

The video still plays as Jungkook looks back at Jiwoo standing right in front of him, her arms are still crossed, but the look on her face is different. Her brows are no longer furrowed and Jungkook might be wrong, but he thinks her eyes look glossy.

He doesn’t act quickly enough and she takes the laptop from him, closing it before she can even notice what is it that has garnered his attention. Jiwoo straddles his lap and he jumps slightly at the action, placing her arms around his neck as she looks at him with innocent eyes.

If he didn’t know her, he would’ve believed them.

‘‘Jiwoo, let’s not─’’

‘‘I missed you yesterday,’’ she interjects in a whisper ‘‘show me that you love me right now.’’

Her lips latch onto his neck, biting and sucking on the skin as he tries to wriggle himself out of her hold, but her hands push at his chest so he can stay still.

‘‘C’mon,’’ she mumbles ‘‘show me.’’ She’s pleading by then.

He feels nothing. There’s no electricity in Jiwoo’s kisses. No tingles on his back, no goosebumps on his skin, no fireworks going off. If anything, everytime her lips meet his skin it feels bitter, like they don’t belong there at all.

‘‘Daddy, come please!’’ The muffled voice of Sunhi inside her room interrupts the one-sided moment and Jungkook is silently thanking her.

Jiwoo doesn’t make an effort to move as she keeps kissing on all the exposed skin he has to offer. Jungkook sighs in frustration as he forces her off him, making her land beside him with an astonished expression.

Her hands tighten into fists as she looks at him like he’s gone insane, ‘‘What the fuck is wrong with you?’’ She asks in disbelief.

Jungkook blinks, ‘‘Did you─?’’ He gestures with his finger over to his daughter’s room, ‘‘Sunhi is calling me.’’

His wife scoffs, crossing her arms over her chest again, ‘‘Of course, you always go running when it comes to her.’’

Contrary to his belief, there is no humanity left in Jiwoo at all. She’s just really good at pretending like she cares so she can get her way. This is the last time Jungkook falls for this trick.

Jungkook opens his mouth, but nothing comes out. He repeats this action a few times, to stammer something out. Anything. But there’s nothing besides the expecting silence of his wife as she chuckles incredulously. Jungkook ignores this and turns around, a second away from opening Sunhi’s bedroom door─

‘‘You’re a waste of a husband.’’ Jiwoo sneered.

His hand drops from the door handle and he sighs, taking a deep breath in and out.

He looks back at her, ‘‘You know what, Jiwoo? I wasn’t lying when I said you weren’t my second choice.’’ he informs and her eyebrow raises up ‘‘But you aren’t my first choice now either.’’

Jiwoo scowls and heaves in anger, ready to let hell loose on him ‘‘I knew that who─’’

‘‘It’s Sunhi,’’ he states and Jiwoo closes her mouth before she can even finish her sentence. ‘‘Ever since I knew you were pregnant with her, she’s been at the top of my list and she’ll always be there. I don’t care what you do or say to me, I really don’t. You don’t love me, Jiwoo.’’

At the accusation, her eyes soften and she’s standing up to argue that it’s not true, but Jungkook raises his hand in a motion to stop her.

‘‘You don’t love me and I don’t love you.’’

Jungkook expected her to start yelling at him like she usually did, but Jiwoo’s rendered speechless on her spot as she stares at him, blinking rapidly.

‘‘I don’t love you,’’ he repeats ‘‘and I haven’t loved you for a while now. I don’t remember the last time my heart raced up when I saw you or when I stopped enjoying kissing you. And I’m sorry, because I should’ve told you instead of pretending like I did.’’

Jiwoo’s motionless as she takes all of his words in.

‘‘But I did it for her because I didn’t want her to hate me if you ever left. But that was a dumb idea because you don’t care about Sunhi. And frankly, I doubt she cares about you either. She never speaks about you, never asks about you, she’s used to you not being here even if you sort of are.’’

Jungkook places his hand over the doorknob once again and Jiwoo grimaces.

‘‘I should’ve never begged you to come back. I should’ve thought about what you wanted and it’s always been clear to me what that is,’’ Jungkook swallows the knot he feels in his throat ‘‘and it’s never been Sunhi or me.’’

‘‘Jungkook.’’

He thinks she’s about to tell him how sorry she is. That she’ll recognize how heartless she’s been and how she not only failed him, but failed their daughter too. Maybe beg for a final try at their relationship as she promises she’ll change this time.

Jungkook hums and spares her one last glance.

Jiwoo has a stoic expression on her face and she speaks under her breath, but clear enough for him to hear, ‘‘Sign the papers when you get them.’’

You expect Minji to just jump at you any minute now because if looks could kill, you’d be dead already. Maybe you should’ve pretended like you weren’t home and let Minji knock on your door until she’d give up, but even you knew better than that.

It was better to face her now than to deal with her accumulated wrath later.

‘‘When were you going to tell me?’’ She suddenly asks and it takes you by surprise because it had been way too silent since you had let her in.

Minji works like a predator, she attacks when you least expect it and right now you definitely feel like you’re about to be eaten.

‘‘I─uh…’’

She sighs and you can see the disappointment in her face, ‘‘Were you going to tell me at all?’’

You nod instead, not trusting yourself enough to speak at the moment.

It had been a week since the event in your living room and it makes you shift uncomfortably in your chair as you stare at your friend, who’s sitting on the couch where everything went down.

‘‘Then why did I have to find out through Taehyung?’’ She asks in a disappointed tone.

You figured he’d tell her. It’s not like you asked him not to do so, but you had silently prayed that the universe was on your side on this one and by some unknown reason they wouldn’t bump into each other at work and Minji, like she usually did, wouldn’t ask him about you. Because if she did, then he’d have to explain how you had broken the news that you had made out with your best friend; the one Minji despised with her soul.

A sigh escapes your lips as you lower your head with shame.

You were supposed to tell her, but every time you took your phone and tried to dial or text her, your nerves got the best of you and ended up chickening out, promising that you’d do it the next day. Then the next day. And the next day.

It’s not like you’re scared of Minji─well, maybe only slightly. But you know the effort she put into getting you to go out and meet someone new, someone that’s not married and not a father. She’s known Taehyung for so long, probably even told him how much of a good girl you were to convince him to take you out, only for you to end up throwing all of that in the trash like it was nothing.

Minji’s also spent years pushing you to move on from your friendship with Jungkook. Not just because she doesn’t like him, but because she’s always felt like he’s held you back while he’s made his way in life. You’ve stuck behind him making sure that he’s okay and happy, forgetting about yourself in the process.

‘‘I’m not angry at you,’’ she speaks softly, making you look up at her with surprise. ‘‘I just─He gave you a second chance, Y/N. Why did you say no?’’ Her words are laced with curiosity and you know that she’s asking because even Taehyung wasn’t able to give her an answer to this question.

Your bottom lip trembles and you’re trying your hardest not to burst into tears in front of him. You can’t and you won’t. How even dare you to do that?

‘‘I’m sorry,’’ you whisper and your eyes shift down to the wooden floor of his apartment. ‘‘I’m sorry, Taehyung.’’ You repeat, knowing it’s not enough.

Taehyung gulps and his crossed arms quickly fall to his sides as he realizes that, whatever anger he felt when you told him about what you did, was no longer there the moment he saw how genuinely apologetic you looked.

‘‘I’m an idiot, I know.’’ You continue, rubbing your clammy hands into the material of your leggings and it does nothing to dry them. ‘‘I’m sorry, Taehyung.’’

He knows he shouldn't be so easily swayed by your apology, but he can’t help but want to cradle you in his arms. And when he does, your eyebrows raise in surprise as you gasp because you weren’t expecting this.

You expected anger, insults thrown out about how you’re a slut and being kicked out of his apartment with him telling you to never contact him again.

Taehyung’s still sweet even when his heart is getting broken.

‘‘It’s okay,’’ he whispers into your hair as one of his hands runs up and down your back ‘‘we can work this out, yeah?’’

You bite the tip of your tongue as you take his words in, feeling your heart speeding up even faster than what it was when you spilled everything out on him. Maybe you would’ve preferred him getting angry than his current reaction.

‘‘It’s not like we were exclusive, right?’’ Taehyung chuckles, but it feels like he’s convincing himself that that was the reason as to why it happened. ‘‘Let’s forget it, seriously.’’

A shaky sigh comes out of your mouth as your arms, that hadn’t reciprocated his hug, gain the strength to separate yourself from him. He looks taken aback, but he’s waiting for you to reply in agreement because, yes, you could work this out if you try hard enough.

But that’s not realistic. Pretending like you never kissed Jungkook is not realistic at all, because it’s sad to admit that you won’t be able to kiss Taehyung again without thinking about your best friend in the back of your head as you’re reminded that not only did you let him kiss you, but you reciprocated and not only did you reciprocate, but you liked it a little too much.

‘‘Y/N,’’ he speaks up, snapping you from your thoughts,‘‘please, let’s just try.’’ He silently asks─no, begs.

The barking of his dog, Yeontan, startles you as you come to stare at the little dog at the feet of his owner, who at the moment isn’t interested to see what he wants. You never told Taehyung, but the teacup pomeranian was extremely overprotective of him.

He’s barking at you like you’re hurting his owner and maybe you aren’t physically doing any damage, but you know that you’re about to break his heart all over again.

‘‘I-I…,’’ you blink as you try to focus on the man in front of you and not the dog on the ground, ‘‘I’m sorry, I can’t.’’

Yeontan’s barks increase and Taehyung is at a loss for words to beg you to stay and talk things through. You can still hear the dog’s incessant barking as you make your way down the hall and that’s when the tears you were holding finally fall down.

‘‘Taehyung’s a nice guy, Y/N. He forgave you and you just left?’’ Minji asks, disbelief in her tone. ‘‘I thought you liked him.’’

‘‘I do!’’ You finally speak up. You’re sure of it, you like Taehyung. Your friend gives you a puzzled look because she really can’t understand you right now. ‘‘I like Taehyung, I really do,’’ you mutter, ‘‘but it’s not fair to him.’’

Minji scrunches her face up because there’s only one reason you’re thinking that way. She’s tired of this narrative, it’s old and overdone and it should’ve ended years ago.

She lets out a breathless chuckle, ‘‘You love him, don’t you?’’ Another question that takes you by surprise.

‘‘No, I just─’’

Minji holds her finger up, interrupting you, ‘‘I’m talking about Jungkook.’’

This is the attack. Not the other questions she had asked you regarding her old family friend. Not the unannounced arrival to your apartment on an uneventful Saturday morning where you had chosen to stay in bed instead of facing the peaceful yoga instructor. Not the glaring looks she had been giving you for the last minutes.

And if you weren’t ready for any of those, this one definitely takes the prize.

‘‘I-I of course I love him,’’ you mumble, ‘‘he’s my friend.’’

Minji smirks as her eyebrows raise, ‘‘No, I’m asking if you’re in love him.’’

You’re sure that the feelings that you’ve had for Jungkook have always been platonic. You do love him because he’s your friend and you’re supposed to love your friends. But you know that the love that you have for him is very different from the one you have for anyone else. It might be the history between you two. You’ve been with him through it all, cheering from the sidelines as he accomplishes one milestone after the other.

‘‘Be honest with me,’’ Minji demands, ‘‘are you in love with Jungkook?’’ she asks once again.

Your eyes well up and your bottom lip is trembling as you look back at your intimidating best friend because your silence is deafening and you’re expecting her to throw the last blow. You think you deserve it. Minji has so much she wants to say, but you look so dejected and she figures that you might’ve just realized it.

‘‘Hey, it’s okay.’’ She comes up to you quickly, crouching down as she looks up at the tears rolling down your reddened cheeks. ‘‘Y/N, it’s okay.’’

You’ve been trying to tell yourself the same thing the past few days.

It’s okay that you kissed your best friend. It’s okay that you’ve slowly and silently started harbouring feelings for him. It’s okay that you just realized you’ve been in love with him for a while now. It’s okay that you’ve been resenting the fact that he didn’t choose you all those years ago. It’s okay that you take care of and love his daughter like she’s yours.

But...

‘‘No, it’s not.’’ You cry, ‘‘I can’t do that, Minji, he’s not mine to have.’’

Your mind quickly brings you back to the harsh reality, which is that Jungkook will never be yours. He probably only kissed you because he was looking for something that was capable of exciting him again after realizing how bored of his marriage he is. He doesn’t love you like that, he’ll never love you like that.

Minji can’t disagree with what you just said, but she also feels like right now is not the time to make you feel even worse when it’s obvious you’re already there.

‘‘I blocked his number, anyway.’’ You mumble out, wiping away your tears.

Your friend’s eyes widened at the revelation, ‘‘What?’’.

‘‘I freaked out after I talked to Taehyung because I felt so guilty and you know how I don’t know how to deal with shit ever, so I just─’’ You stop yourself from rambling and sigh as you feel Minji’s hand squeezing your knee as a sign of comfort, ‘‘I can’t see him again without thinking about it. I can’t take care of Sunhi knowing he’s going home to sleep with Jiwoo. I just can’t keep pretending anymore.’’

Minji can’t do much after that, you’ve become a sobbing mess and the tears seem unstoppable. She’s never seen you like this and it dawns on her that you’ve held all of this in for way too long.

It’s ironic because she’s always told you that you need space from Jungkook, thinking it’d be good for you to finally realize that you’re not part of his list of priorities anymore and hadn’t been for a long time.

But she hadn’t taken into account what the after effects of not having him in your life anymore would look like.

[12:03 PM] Jeon Jungkook: hi y/n

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[12:04 PM] Jeon Jungkook: hey???

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[12:07 PM] Jeon Jungkook: i wanted to see if you’d like to meet up for lunch one of these days? i feel like we need to talk

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[5:13 PM] Jeon Jungkook: does this work now??

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Jungkook groans in annoyance as he finds another one of his texts left undelivered. It feels like life is either against him or doing this for his own good.

Nonetheless, he wants to talk to you because it’s been a few days since he last saw and heard from you. He figures you’re mad, the last words you spoke to him didn’t sound friendly at all and he wonders if maybe leaving without saying goodbye that day was the right thing to do.

The small snores coming from beside him make him realize Sunhi is finally asleep and he can’t help but let out a sigh of disappointment as he watches her curl into a fetal like position, clutching her Dumbo plush toy and slightly drooling into his favorite pillow, making him pout because he knows he won’t be able to pry it away from her when he decides to fall asleep too.

Sunhi being fast asleep is supposed to bring peace to Jungkook’s tiring day, though the silence is extremely uncomfortable and these days he’s come to realize how much he rather have his daughter running around and yelling in excitement than this.

Complete and utter silence.

[7:13 PM] Jeon Jungkook: (1.jpg attached) sunhi misses auntie y/n!! she’s been asking me about you a lot

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[7:15 PM] Jeon Jungkook: i miss auntie y/n more tho…

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[7:17 PM] Jeon Jungkook: i hope ur alright :)

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‘‘Pumpkin, you can stop smiling already.’’ Jungkook chuckles as he looks up from his phone, noticing his daughter still holding the big smile he had given him when he requested to take a picture of her to send to you. ‘‘I already sent the picture to Auntie Y/N.’’ He informs and she sighs with relief, massaging her cheeks from straining them too hard.

Though his eyebrows furrow, noticing his messages have once again been left undelivered. He makes a mental note to call the phone company soon, because it’s been over a week since he last sent the first messages and those remained in the same state as well.

‘‘Daddy, unpause!’’ Sunhi demands, making him realize that he’s in the middle of showing her his favorite Pixar movie, Cars.

Twenty minutes had passed and for a majority of them Sunhi had only watched attentively and Jungkook looked over at her every other second just to make sure she hadn’t fallen asleep. Warmness spread throughout him as he noticed his daughter looking at the screen with those big doe eyes she had inherited from him.

Once the scene where Sally shows Lightning McQueen around Radiator Springs, Jungkook feels a tug at his sweatshirt and looks down to notice Sunhi’s little hand grabbing at the fabric, her eyes are still glued to the screen.

“Auntie Y/N likes this too?” She asks and Jungkook chuckles because his daughter can’t stop thinking about his friend even when doing anything completely unrelated to you.

Maybe that’s another thing she inherited as well.

[7:03 PM] Jeon Jungkook: so i called my phone company and asked them abt why my messages aren’t being delivered and they said that you must’ve blocked me

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[7:04 PM] Jeon Jungkook: yeah i guess you did

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Jungkook’s mind has gone blank ever since he got off the phone with the cellphone company.

The idea that you might’ve blocked his number had not once crossed his mind during the weeks of undelivered texts and phone calls sent straight to voicemail. It was obvious, but he didn’t think you’d be capable of doing it.

He wanted it to be a network issue or something else that he could put blame on instead of facing the realization that you had shut him out from your life. And that thought hurt, no─stung him.

The worst part is that he knows he deserves it. It was foolish of him to think that you had enjoyed the kiss too. Dumb enough to believe that you might’ve reciprocated the way he felt.

Jungkook doesn’t want to think this is the end, maybe it’s that stupid voice inside his head that always holds on to things that he knows he should let go of. But he can’t just let go of this and move on.

He doesn’t remember what life was like before you and he sure as hell does not want to know what it’ll be like without you.

[1:30 AM] Jeon Jungkook: i miss you so fucking much i’m sorry if i knew that kissing you would’ve fucked everything up htne i woudl’ve never done it y/n i’m sorry

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[1:31 AM] Jeon Jungkook: i really wanted to kiss you but it was selfish of me to do it i didnt think about what you must’ve felt im sos sorry

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[1:32 AM] Jeon Jungkook: sunhi’s been asking me about yoj and i dont even know what to say anymore

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[2:27 AM] Jeon Jungkook: i don’t even care if you dont wanna speak to me anymore i fucked this up for sunhi she loves you so much and you’re her favorite person ever and i ruined it for her just bc i wanted to see if you felt the same way as i do

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[3:50 AM] Jeon Jungkook: i miss you y/n i really do

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“Daddy, lemme go!” Sunhi whines trying to escape from her father’s hands as he finishes applying the sunscreen on her arms, “Daddy!”.

He gives her a stern look and the toddler huffs, sticking her bottom lip out in an act of annoyance. The playground games are waiting for her and she feels like her dad is just coming between them and her.

“Alright,” he pats his big hands on her tiny arms, “you’re good to—“ Jungkook isn’t able to finish his sentence because his daughter’s already running towards one of the slides, “Sunhi, be careful!” He reminds her, but she’s too focused on the rides than on her dad’s warning.

Jungkook sighs and relaxes into the bench.

“She’s precious,” She comments with a small smile as her attention focuses on the little girl having the time of her life going down the slide, “I’m surprised she’s yours.”

Jungkook looks over at the woman beside him and scoffs, but he can’t help but agree. Sunhi is too good and too pure, the best thing he’s ever done in his life.

“Yeah, well, it’s all her.” Jungkook admits, eyes focusing back on Sunhi, “She’s really great.”

There’s an uncomfortable silence between them and Jungkook has to clear his throat to gain her attention.

“I’m sorry I couldn’t meet up at a café,” Jungkook apologizes and nods over at his daughter, “she’s been a little misbehaved lately, you said you wanted to talk to me and I figured that if I took Sunhi to a place like that she’d just—“

She interrupts his rambling, “Hey, it’s okay. I have no problem, really.” She assures him and he nods slightly, “I haven’t been in a place like this in a long time.”

Jungkook scratches the back of his neck and glances over at the woman who’s looking at him with an expression he can’t quite pinpoint. It makes him so nervous that he quickly shifts his gaze to the ground.

“This is so weird.” He admits with an awkward chuckle and she raises her eyebrow, “I mean—you hate me, Minji, so I don’t know what you want to talk about.”

“I don’t hate you!” Minji laughs and Jungkook finally looks at her and she falters, “Seriously! I only dislike you and that’s saying a lot.”

He supposes that’s a good thing, considering how aggressive Minji used to be towards him back in college. Always letting him know how much she despised his guts, how he didn’t deserve to have you as his friend and even once threw a drink at his face during a party; though you swore to him she was drunk and that she didn’t mean it.

Jungkook hadn’t seen her much since, only a few times if it was your birthday and they managed to cross paths, because the girl made sure she was never in the same room as him. The times it happened, he felt like she was throwing daggers at him through her eyes.

“It always bothered me how putty in your hands she was for you,” Minji begins, crossing her arms over her chest as she settles back into the bench, “and how oblivious you were about it.”

Jungkook looks back at her and there’s a small smile on her face, most likely looking over at his daughter.

“How when we got together for study sessions, she’d be tired because she was taking care of you the night before at one of those stupid frat parties you loved dragging her to.” Minji recalls and Jungkook feels like his mouth has gone dry from the memory.

She crosses one of her legs over the other, “Or that whole Jiwoo ordeal, how you had practically put Y/N aside once you managed to date the ‘campus hottie’.” She says with air quotes and Jungkook sighs, remembering the beginning of it all.

He knows that he can’t turn back time and change it all. Even if he could, he knows he wouldn’t. If there was no Jiwoo, there’d be no Sunhi.

An excited yell startles him as he looks over at his daughter, swinging up and down. “Look, daddy! I'm flying!” She calls and he smiles at her.

“Jesus, that’s fucking precious.” Minji mumbles, but he hears her nonetheless and nods in agreement. “Anyway, I’m not going to act like a saint here and pretend I was vouching for you, because I never did.”

Jungkook knows. Back then he didn’t understand why Minji was so adamant about trash talking him to you, considering how he and her barely knew each other. Actually, whatever knowledge they had of the other was through of you.

But Jungkook’s done a lot of self reflecting for the past month and a half and he’s realized why Minji disliked him so much. Or, dislikes. Either way, it’s valid.

“I just wanted her to snap out of it,” she confesses, “and realize that there is a life beyond you. That there’s more than being your best friend and your daughter’s babysitter. That she’s capable of moving on and putting you aside, because if you did that to her then why shouldn’t she?”

Jungkook hadn’t thought about any of that at all. He had realized he had been a shitty friend, but the idea of just how much definitely hadn’t settled on him. He wishes you knew how much he’s cared about you, but that there were too many overlapping lines for him to ever express it.

“I thought that after setting her up with Taehyung she had finally realized it,” she continues “but you know how she is, she rarely lets up and I knew she wasn’t going to let you go that easily.”

Jungkook draws in a long breath, rubbing his now clammy hands in his jeans as he looks back towards Minji.

“I mean, she couldn’t let her go that easily.” She jerks her head towards Sunhi, still sitting on the swings, though she’s slowed down now. “She loves that little girl so damn much.”

Jungkook’s sure of this. He recognizes the immense love you have for Sunhi, how sincere and unconditional it is. It’s the way a mother loves her child, though he never expected it to come from you instead. He’s not surprised though, because it’s the same love you gave to him. But it’s louder, there are no boundaries that you needed to respect to show Sunhi just how much you loved her, unlike with him.

It dawns on him that cutting him off must’ve been hard. You probably wanted to do it for way longer and only stayed because of Sunhi and Jungkook doesn’t want to think about the dilemma you must’ve went through to finally do it this time around.

He runs his hands through his hair, letting out a shaky breath, remembering that Sunhi doesn’t have you anymore. That’s the reason as to why she’s been so misbehaved lately, crying way too often, throwing tantrums over the smallest of things. Jungkook could blame it on the fact that she’s soon turning four and maybe it’s something that comes with age, it might just be a coincidence that she’s acting this way during a time you’re no longer present in her life.

This is the thing Sunhi might not be able to forgive him for.

“Minji,” he finally speaks up and the woman beside him focuses his gaze back on him, “I miss her so much.” He mumbles, not trusting himself to speak up because he might choke back a sob.

“Only now?”

“No!” He says this a little too harshly and Minji jumps slightly at the tone in his voice, “I’ve always missed her and I’m fucking idiot for realizing too late.”

She hums and Jungkook’s chest rises and falls with rapid breaths, “She’s my first thought when I wake up and when I finally manage to go to sleep. Sunhi constantly reminds me about her, asking me where she is and when can she see her and I have to force myself to lie.”

Jungkook doesn’t realize Minji’s hand is now awkwardly placed on his back, hesitantly tapping as if to give him some comfort. It’s weird to see him like this, she had convinced herself that the guy didn’t have any feelings when it came to you.

“She blocked my number, I can’t call her and all my texts have been left undelivered. I’ve driven by her apartment building too many times with the plan to go up and talk to her, but I always back out because I’m an idiot and I know she’ll hate me if I do that and I—“

“Jungkook.”

“I just want to know if she still cares, I don’t mind if she doesn’t feel the same way. But I want to know that Y/N still cares about Sunhi and me. Do you know? Does she? Could you please—“

Jungkook’s ramble is interrupted by the crying sounds of Sunhi, who’s now on the ground as she sobs and he quickly stands up to go straight towards her. He blinks away the tears that had formed in his eyes because there’s only room for one crying baby here.

“Pumpkin, what happened?” He asks in a soft voice, crouching down at her level and she’s pouting as she points at her bloody knee. “Did you fall down?” She nods and he sighs, picking her up as he takes her back to the bench where Minji waits with expectancy to check on the little girl.

Jungkook places Sunhi beside her and looks through his daughter’s bag for the emergency kit he carried around. He cleans the blood delicately with a gauze and alcohol, making the little girl wince and yelp out an ‘ouch!’ as she holds tightly to Minji’s thigh.

“It’s okay, Pumpkin.” He reassures her with a smile, making his daughter nod because she trusts her dad, “It was an accident and accidents are part of growing up, right?” She nods again and Minji figures this isn’t a first for her.

Once the blood has been cleaned, Jungkook places a cute rainbow patterned bandaid on the wound in her knee.

“There we go,” he announces and Sunhi lets out the breath she’d been holding, ‘‘all done! Are you good now?”

“Yes,” Sunhi weakly replies, “daddy, I wanna go home.”

Jungkook’s eyebrows raise in surprise, but the look on her face tells him that she’s probably still shaken by the accident and most likely wants to take a nap to forget about it.

He looks over at Minji with an apologetic look and she gives him half a smile, “Go, it’s alright.”

Jungkook nods and takes Sunhi in his arms, which she gladly accepts and settles her head in the crook of his neck. Minji’s ready to leave, figuring there was no point in staying any longer.

“Minji, wait!” He stops her before she goes, making her turn around and offer him a curious look, “Sunhi’s birthday is in a few weeks and,” Jungkook reaches for something inside his daughter’s bag, “she really wants Y/N to be there.” He whispers, taking out a party invitation to hand over to Minji.

She smirks, looking at the personalized invitation for his daughter’s fourth birthday, “Just Sunhi?” She asks and he lets out a breathless laugh.

“Me too.” Jungkook adds and a small smile appears on his face as he says it. “Uh—thank you for talking to me, I know it must’ve been hard.”

Minji swats her hand in the air, “It’s alright, just wanted to make sure how you and the kid were doing. It’s all she talks about anyway.”

A gasp escapes his lips and he holds on to his daughter tighter as she nuzzles her face farther in.

“I’ll give her the card, but—I can’t guarantee if she’ll go.” She warns and he nods, understanding.

Though he does not like the possible outcome, he settles down with the idea that you’ll notice how even though you both haven’t spoken towards each other in almost two months, he’s still thinking about you either way. Every day.

#jungkook angst #jungkook au #jungkook smut #jungkook scenario #jungkook fic #jungkook fluff #bts fanfic #bts smut #f: chasing pavements

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revengeisourlullaby · 3 years ago

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If I Never Knew You Pt.4

Pt.1 Pt.2 Pt.3 Pt.4 Pt.5 Pt.6

Warnings:18+, angst, secret relationhsip, kinda royal au, arranged marriage plot

a/n: Part 4 everybody! I will be posting part 5 this evening bc this one is kinda fillerish so I don’t wanna leave y’all hanging for too long. If you wanna be tagged let me know! I’m sorry it gets a little bit more angsty before its resolves, but I promise it will resolve.

Word count: 1.7K

Loki x female!reader

Sun shone through the arches in Loki’s bedroom, the fresh Asgardian air whirling through the room. You rolled on your side to get a look at your lover to see if sleep had evaded him yet. His eyes were still closed, lids flickering back and forth causing a smile to form on your face because you were wondering what he could be dreaming about.

You returned to your back staring at the ceiling imagining that this atmosphere of serenity would soon be all yours to have until the end of days. Closing your eyes you tried to relish in it for a little while longer, but your thoughts would soon be rapping at your fantasy. Eating away at you with shame, guilt, and unfortunately a heavy dose of fear.

You grabbed the top silk sheet and pulled it over your exposed body. Sliding to the edge of the bed, you hang your head in disappointment. Knowing that in a few hours you would have to fight not only for your freedom but for your love. It was a nightmare come to life but you had to remember that nothing worthwhile in life came easy and if that meant losing in one aspect or another you felt that you could muster the courage to go through with it. You turned your head to gaze at Loki still sleeping and with a snap of a finger, your worries seemed to pale.

He was your strength, your rock, your whole world. He taught you more than you could ever have hoped to learn and most importantly he taught you how to be annoyingly persistent to get the things that you wanted in life. Not to say that you gave up easily but he showed you how to weasel your way into ensuring you got what your heart desired. Life is full of losing but he showed you how to make the best of it.

“Perhaps we should get someone to make you a personal statue of me so you can stare at it as long as you want.”

Loki’s voice pulled you from your thoughts and you felt heat rise up in your face.

“My apologies, I was just lost in thought. Didn’t mean to be staring at you as you woke up.”

Loki chuckled, finding your fluster endearing in the situation. Sitting up in the bed he patted the space on the bed where you were laying through the night. You scooted back into the bed making your way to Loki where he wrapped his hands in yours and stared at you.

A gentle seriousness cast upon his face.

“Understand that by mulling over the situation you dread to confront, you will make it harder in the process to assemble the resolution you seek. You mustn't fear what you fear, but rather take it head-on like a bull. And with the stubbornness you harbor, I know you have it in you.”

You snorted a little extra air out of your nose at his ending comment. Knowing he was always at the receiving end of your stubborn nature. At first somewhat annoying but became something he loved about you in a little time.

“I would run to the edge of time for you Loki. Even though it’s just my childhood home I’m going to have to run in and declare my objections, love, and fears to the people that brought me into this world. It feels like I’m running into a rabid lion’s den, but I would be lying if I didn’t say the preemptive catharsis I’m feeling is liberating.”

You squeezed his hand and looked up at him, his eyebrows furrowed and eyes soft. It looked as if he was about to cry.

“Not for nothing but I always figured I would be alone, especially in a romantic fashion. Then you came quite literally out of nowhere and I never grasped the thought that finding you in that garden a year ago would make that fear wither away. For that, I am eternally grateful to you.”

Your eyes and face softened from its initial confused form to that of warmth and admiration. You even failed to realize the tears beginning to prickle at your water line. Not of sadness but rather pure happiness. At this moment you knew that Loki was the soulmate you were meant to meet in this lifetime. The words he spoke struck a chord within you because you too felt the same way.

That loneliness was just a card in your deck you were left to bear, but Loki let the hopeless romanticism within you survive the trials of life.

“Eternally yours, Loki. I am eternally yours. Through all either of our falls, we are each other’s stone. Let’s rewrite this acrid end and finally enjoy our story.” Loki’s hands wrapped around your face, looking into your eyes searching for any falsity in your being and he found none.

You brought your hand up to his face and moved a strand of hair out of his face, allowing for him to be on full display to you. You opened your mouth to say words but they fell off, afraid that they would feel foreign on your tongue. You tried again and Loki’s mouth parted at the same time.

“I love you.” The words echoing from being said at the same time. The meaning ringing throughout each of your ears becoming fully aware that the truth was being shared between the two of you. Loki placed a tender kiss upon your lips and you relished in the sincerity of it. Pulling away you decided there was no better time than the present.

“I suppose I should be heading back home to face the one last hurdle for us.”

“Right. Let me fix your dress for you.”

Standing up from the bed you waltzed around the rail of the bed and found the shredded pieces of fabric that once was your dress.

“You sure you can magic this back together?”

You cocked your eyebrow unsure of the possibility of the repair of your dress. Opening his mouth, nothing but a squeak escaped from his throat realizing the predicament you two were in.

“I may have another idea. Just wait here for a moment.” Loki got himself dressed and left his quarters to head somewhere you knew not of. Before he left he turned his head behind the door to look at you.

“Help yourself to anything in the bathroom and get ready otherwise besides your clothing.”

You nodded your head and waved him off to wherever he was going. Walking to the bathroom you stared at your reflection in the large grandiose mirror that adorned one of the walls. You were glowing. Your eyes actually held something other than resentment and fear. You looked like yourself.

Something you hadn’t seen in years. Smiling you finished getting yourself ready and when you were getting ready to turn on your heel you heard the door open. Stopping in your tracks you hid in the corner, but soon hearing Loki’s voice you released a sigh of relief. Stepping out of the bathroom Loki had a midnight blue dress draped over his arm.

“I figured my mother would’ve had something she could spare and she did and I feel that it will suit you just right.”

Tentatively you reached out to grab the dress from his hands

“And you’re sure she’s okay with this?”

“Yes darling, she’s the only one besides Thor that is aware of what’s going on. I can’t wait for her to meet you. Now, go ahead and try it on.”

Rolling the dress up in your hands you pulled it over your head and wiggled your arms into the sleeves.

Letting the dress fall down to the floor after fitting it over your torso you were in awe. The color complementing your skin, the sleeves falling off your shoulders and the gold accents on the neckline was much more beautiful than what you were imagining.

“You look stunning. Well, you always do but especially today.”

“Thank you, Loki.”

You smiled and wrapped your arms around Loki’s neck.

“Wish me luck?” “Luck is for losers, I’ll wish you strength and perseverance.” “Good enough.”

Standing on your toes lightly you brought yourself to his lips and shared what you were to find out to be the last tranquil and harmonious kiss. You pulled away and smiled at him. Bending over you grabbed your satchel and shoes that you threw into the room earlier yesterday. Walking to the door, Loki sped up behind you to open it.

“What are you doing?”

“What kind of man would I be if I let my lady not only walk alone but to open her own doors?”

“Chivalry isn’t dead!”

You smiled at him knowing your sarcasm was endearing. Walking you out to the front of the palace where you came in yesterday you turned to look at him and little worry apparent in your features. You reached for his hand squeezing it in your own in search of some type of reassurance. Loki reached for your other hand and turned you to face him fully.

“Whatever happens Y/N, I’ll always be with you. Forever.”

Placing your hand upon his cheek, you thumbed his soft skin and placed a strand of hair behind his ear. Sighing you found your fire once again and you looked at him. Silently letting him know that you were ready.

“I’ll see you, hopefully, this evening Loki...and hopefully with good news.”

Removing your hands from each other you walked down the steps and your feet crunched the earth beneath your shoes. Getting one last look, you waved at Loki and you began the walk back to your home. Preparing for the worst but foolishly wishing for the best.

#loki #loki fanfic #loki x reader #loki laufeyson #loki laufeyson fanfic #loki laufeyson x reader #loki imagine #loki laufeyson imagine #marvel fanfic #marvel x reader

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candychronicles · 5 years ago

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catnip // h. shinsou

A/N: My take on the nsfw 7 minutes in heaven inspired server collab. Strap in folks, it’s a long one!

CHARACTER PAIRING: Shinsou Hitoshi x Reader

WORD COUNT: 3,043

WARNINGS: unprotected sex, choking, overstimulation, really just generally safe, kinky sex

SYNOPSIS: It seemed crazy, but against your better judgement, you signed up for a ‘steamy night with a local hottie.’ You weren’t expecting too much out of the whole situation but boy, were you wrong.

Want to enjoy another steamy story? Follow this link to the Masterlist !

your heartbeat pounded through your ears as you fully removed the lid. on top was a notecard with the address to what you assumed would be the meeting place with a date and time. just three days away and you’d be having the time of your life, or so the website said.

a sick feeling crawled up your throat and you almost threw the box away in the trash can. what were you doing? were you really about to meet up with some stranger, at a random location, to eventually go back somewhere and fuck? what if he was a murderer? what if he had bad intentions? sure, there was a background check involved, and the initial meeting place was a neutral location where you could feel each other out, but still, were you that desperate for a good dicking down?

the answer was a very resounding yes, and with a firm shake of your head, you pushed the worried thoughts out of your mind and removed the note with the sheet of paper. underneath was a… cat toy? and was that catnip? you were extremely, extremely confused, the object not doing anything to quell your nerves but only heighten them. but still, you were intrigued, and you’d be damned if you let nerves get in the way of a potentially good night.

the next couple of days felt like a blur. you had gotten your eyebrows done, whole body painfully waxed, moisturized like there was no tomorrow, and overall felt like a soft goddess. you had spent hours attempting to pick out the perfect outfit and more importantly, the perfect lingerie. you had little to go on: he was in similar age, had generally the same sexual interests and kinks and was supposedly not a total creep.

you had eventually settled on sexy yet simple: a lacy red one piece that clung to your body. overtop of your ensemble, you chose a simple black t-shirt dress with a cardigan. cute, appropriate for a normal bar, but easy to take off or push aside if it came down to it. very minimal makeup was applied: you didn’t want to sweat it all off and look like a gremlin. with a pair of kitten heels and a satin choker, you were out the door, palms sweaty.

the actual drive over went by in a blur, your mind too jumbled to even realize you had arrived. the instructions were to sit at the stool all the way to the left of the bar and order a whiskey, neat. typically, you weren’t a drinker, but tonight, you needed at least a pinch of liquid courage to follow through. a few tense minutes had passed, you swirling the thin plastic straw in the golden drink. a large, firm hand had gently placed itself on your right shoulder and you jumped, dropping the straw back in the drink.

“i’m sorry for startling you. are you (l/n) (y/n)?”

the first thing you noticed was his voice. it was deep, smooth, slow, much like the drink you were consuming. you were almost scared to look up, afraid his voice wouldn’t match his face, but you took one deep breath and looked up.

holy fuck he is hot. like really, really, really hot.

“it’s fine! uh, yes i am though. you’re Shinsou Hitoshi, then?” you squeaked out, your voice and raging blush betraying your enamored feelings.

a gentle chuckle left his lips and he removed his hand from your shoulder, choosing instead to sit down next to you and order the same drink.

“i am. to be honest, i was a bit skeptical about joining the site, but with a schedule like mine, it seemed like a good way to meet someone and uh, enjoy my free time.”

“oh my gosh, me too! i mean, i know the site does a lot to keep everything safe, but you’re still running a risk. and what if you get matched up with someone that you don’t find attractive? oh no, you don’t find me too ugly, do you?”

suddenly, you were very self conscious about the way you looked, tugging on the sleeves of your cardigan.

“no, you’re not ugly at all. in fact, kitten, you’re quite cute,” he assured, giving you a heart stopping smirk. “what about me?”

in that moment, you had realized a few things. first, you had understood why he sent a cat toy. second, you wanted him to call you kitten for the rest of your life. and third, you were dripping through your lingerie already. he was attractive, painfully so. sharp jawline with an even sharper gaze. it felt like he could stare through straight to your soul and honestly, you would bare all for him at that moment.

“cat got your tongue?” he teased, leaning forward and placing a warm palm on your thigh, rubbing small circles on your skin with his rough thumb. you could only imagine how that thumb would feel pressed against your clit and you let out an almost inaudible whine.

“you’re really, really attractive,” you finally breathed out, enamored by the way he was looking at you. you felt like he was the cat and you were just his toy but at that moment, you didn’t care.

“are you done with your drink? we can head back to my place. only if you want though,” he offered, knowing you weren’t going to refuse but being a gentleman anyways.

“yes, i’m done and i’d love to go back to your place.”

the car ride to his house was full of tension yet surprisingly comfortable. you had both chatted, talking about your mutual love of animals, how he was a pro hero and that’s why he turned to the website, how you were busy with your job but wanted to do something exciting for once, and other little topics that made you feel more at ease. his palm rested on your thigh again, so close to where you needed him but yet so far away.

you finally made it to the rather impressive house. you shouldn’t have been surprised; after all, he was a pro hero, but your mouth still gaped open in surprise.

while you were gaping, Shinsou had gotten out of the car and opened your door, smiling down at you and patiently waiting for you to exit. you hastily stumbled out of the car, tripping into his arms.

“careful. wouldn’t want my kitty getting hurt before the real fun began.”

he was looking at you like you were something fragile and he wanted to absolutely devour in the most delicious way possible. you had never been bolder in your life, but something about the way he was looking at you, the way he smelled, the warmth of his body, made you forget every worry or care you had and you reached forward, ghosting your lips over his.

“trust me, i can handle it.”

a low growl eminanted from his throat, and he practically dragged you into his house, grip firm on your arm.

“don’t say i didn’t warn you.”

the second the door closed, his lips was on yours, hot and inviting. his tongue slipped into your mouth with ease, finding no resistance from you. you were too caught up in his scent, that irresistible sandalwood and lavender smell that drove you mad, too caught up in the way his hands roamed all over your body, cupping your breasts, your ass, your throat, feeling the way you reacted just with a simple touch.

“while i’d gladly fuck you against this door right here and now, i would much rather take this to my room.”

“agreed,” you panted, looking up at him expectantly, waiting for him to make the next move.

he had put a hand dangerously low on your waist, gently guiding you up the stairs and towards his room. you had no time to analyze your surroundings before his mouth was on you again, nipping at the sensitive skin on your neck, no doubt leaving bruises.

you kicked off your heels, removed your cardigan, and placed your hands firmly on his chest, attempting to gain a sense of your surroundings, too wobbly on your feet from all the pleasure he was creating just with his kisses.

you felt his hands softly snake up your dress, a low hitch in his breath as he rubbed his hands over the lace. he flicked on the light with his shoulder, not letting his hands leave your body. you were able to finally look up at him, look at his messy hair from where your hands were, from his swollen lips, from the absolutely feral look in his eyes, and you knew nothing would ever compare to the experience you were about to have.

your dress came over your head and before you could register what was happening, he kissed you again with ferocity, his shirt now discarded in the pile of clothes on the floor. you placed your hands gently back onto his chest and moaned into his mouth, feeling the smooth muscle flex underneath your featherlight touch.

he pulled away briefly, looking you up and down, rubbing his thumb softly over the satin black choker around your neck. he stepped forward, forcing you to take a step back, and then again, and again, until your knees hit his bed and you fell onto your back. he came to rest overtop of you, dwarfing his body with your own, one knee pressed into your clothed cunt.

“you’re so fucking wet already. i can feel it through my pants.”

“maybe you should take your pants off,” you countered cheekily, reaching down towards his clothes.

“patience, kitten. we’ll get there soon enough. let me take care of you first.”

his hot lips peppered sloppy kisses all over your neck, your collarbone, your shoulders, chest, before he slowly slid one strap of your one piece down, then the other, exposing your breasts to him. the rough pads of his fingers played with one nipple, twisting and squeezing, eliciting breathy moans from you. his mouth came down to lick and suck on the other, flicking the nub with his wet, muscled tongue. your back arched off the bed, desperate for some sort of relief from the torture he was enacting upon your body.

“patience, kitten. i’m going to have to punish you even more if you don’t wait for me.”

your back laid down flat on the bed again, a whine leaving your open mouth, but you relented. you were absolute putty in his hands and he knew it. Shinsou continued his ministrations down your body, over your navel, around your hip bones, all the while pulling the lacy garment off of you.

finally, you were completely exposed for him save the satin choker, which he insisted you kept on. you were as still as a board, afraid that if you moved, you wouldn’t get what you desired.

“look at you. so fucking desperate for me to touch you. fucking slut. tell me what you want.”

“you, i want you,” you replied without question, wiggling your hips slightly, absolutely anguished.

“who do you want?” he asked again, blowing a cool stream of air on your pussy, watching as you whined and clenched around nothing.

“you, Shinsou, you, please fucking touch me!”

“you can call me Hitoshi next time,” he relented, dipping one finger experimentally in between your folds, coating it in juices. his finger rubbed soft patterns over your clit before finding purchase in your sopping cunt, curling slowly.

“please, Hitoshi, i need more, please,” you begged, frustration laced in your voice.

he complied, satisfied with how absolutely distressed you sounded, inserting two fingers, stretching you out just enough to satisfy you. the pad of his tongue came down on your clit, starting off with kitten licks, moving onto sucking and gentle biting. his whole face was buried in your pussy, squelching sounds emanating, you absolutely soaked from the combination of his fingers and tongue.

you felt the familiar heat pool in your lower stomach and you chased your high with resolve, so aching for release, hips grinding against his face and fingers white from gripping the sheets so harshly. Shinsou pulled away at your peak, your essence coating his face and finger, dripping down his chin.

he had climbed back on top of you, catching you in a searing kiss, the taste of you on him electrifying, before standing up and reaching into the drawer to pull out a condom.

“i’m on birth control,” you stated, grabbing his hand and pulling the condom out of it. while he was caught off guard, wide eyed and glistening from your juices, you dropped to his knees, unbuckling his pants and pulling them, along with his boxes, down around his ankles.

he was long, on the thinner side, with a slight curve to the left, and you were absolutely enamored, mouth watering in anticipation. you started off by giving him a taste of his own medicine, running your thumb in circles around his head, spreading the precum over the tip, using your hands to slowly pump him, but you were honestly delirious off of pleasure and couldn’t wait, slowly easing your mouth over his cock.

“fuck, you feel so good,” he hissed, letting one hand grab a fistful of your hair, gently tugging.

you took your time, leisurely moving your mouth down his cock until it hit the back of your throat with a gag. Shinsou gently bucked his hips, your saliva dribbling onto your chin, mirroring his own face.

without warning, Shinsou pulled you off his cock with a satisfying pop, pushing you back onto the bed, looming dangerously over top of you. you felt as if his entire presence was going to crush you whole, reduce you into a pile of mush, and you were completely, totally, one hundred percent okay with that.

“are you ready kitten?” he purred into your ear, softly fisting his cock and lining the tip with your entrance.

you could only nod and squeak out a quiet yes, head too fuzzy from everything that was going on. he slowly pushed his way into you, bottoming out deliciously on your cervix, stretching you out in ways you never thought possible.

he started his pace off slow and brutal, teasing you in the best way possible. you had attempted to move faster but his arms caged you down, making you suffer through his deliciously torturous stride. it seemed, however, that he too was frustrated and needed more, and so a faster and mind numbing pace was set. your legs were spread on either side of his head, pushed all the way back to your own head.

you were so pent up that the orgasm you had been chasing returned quickly with revenge. you began moaning and whining, clawing at his toned back, pulling on his soft purple locks, anything to ground yourself from the imminent feeling of pleasure.

Shinsou was quiet for the most part, small pants and grunts leaving his mouth here and there, so you were a bit startled to hear his voice.

“do you trust me?” he asked huskily, slowing his pace back down, lowering your legs.

“i do,” you answered honestly. though you didn’t know him too well, he showed you nothing but respect both in and out of the bedroom and you were eager to see where he was going with this.

just as you were about to ask, though, your mind went blank. you could feel Shinsou’s presence surround you completely and wholly. you could think of nothing except him, feel nothing except him. you were aware of the heat in your core, you could feel the sheer pleasure of his now fast pace, you could feel his hand grasping your neck enough to just slightly restrict your airflow, but that’s all you could pay attention to, was him. you weren’t really sure what was going on, but you didn’t mind. you were delirious for relief.

“come for me kitten,” he commanded.

in an instant, your whole body spasmed. white, searing pleasure shot through your core, down to the tips of your toes and to the top of your head. it felt like the orgasm lasted for hours. you weren’t sure what had happened, but when you came out of your pleasurable yet painful stupor, Shinsou was gently cleaning you up with a warm cloth.

“how are you feeling? are you okay?” he asked, concern apparent in his voice.

“i-i think so. can i have some water?” you asked, voice hoarse from probably screaming.

he helped you sit up, propping your body with his own, letting you take small sips from a glass.

“i don’t know what happened, but that was the best sex i have ever had. i don’t know how anyone else will ever compare,” you admitted with a sigh, finally feeling strong enough to stand up and stretch.

“did you have a good time?” you asked a bit self consciously, choosing to not look at him and instead walking towards the pile of clothes by the door.

“i had a really good time. a really fucking good time.”

his hand came out to grasp your wrist gently, pulling you towards him, grabbing your chin and making you look up at his face.

“i’d like to do this again sometime. genuinely. that is, if you want to.”

“are you serious? i mean, i’m not anything that special, i didn’t do too much and i…” you were cut off with a chaste kiss to your lips.

“i know we just met, but i really enjoyed our conversation just as much as what just went down. i’d really like to get to know you more,” he admitted, dropping his hands to awkwardly scratch the back of his neck.

“i’d really like to get to know you more, too, Hitoshi. really,” you assured, this time grabbing his face with your hands.

“but first, i want to sleep. mind if i crash here for the night? a couch will do just fine,” you asked hopefully.

“after what i did to you, you are definitely sleeping in the bed with me.”

“oh thank god. i’m really, really sore.”

#shinsou hitoshi #shinsou #shinsou x reader #shinsou hitoshi x reader #bnha shinsou #mha shinsou #boku no hero academia #my hero academia #bnha #mha #boku no hero x reader

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dancing-the-hellfire-rumba · 4 years ago

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Seen ✓ - 1

REWRITE OF “Can You See The Stars”

Pairing: Sam x Fem!Reader Warnings: fear of being kidnapped Word Count: 2.4k Series Summary: On her way home, Y/n finds an abandoned, cracked phone on the sidewalk. Anxious about the well-being of its owner, she picks it up and texts the first contact she finds; Sam. A/N:This is my second attempt at the story everyone loved, with an actual pllot in mind this time. So, attempt number two, better writing, better story. Have at it kids.

I have tagged the old taglist for this first part. Let me know if you wanna be removed/ added

Beta: The lovely @percywinchester27 . Thank you so so much hon :) Masterlist

Chapter One: you sure know how to fuck me up on a friday night

Y/n | Sam

The road to independence is uphill, and Y/n knows this better than anyone. She’s done it all. She’s gone through jobs at a similar speed with which she goes through books, worked two or more of them, while also studying for college… She knows how it works, and it’s really fucking difficult to balance emotional baggage the size of a city, an underage sister and college, while also trying to keep, not only yourself, but another person, alive, under a safe roof with food in your stomachs.

Currently, she’s only working one job, at a dive bar owned by a friend of a friend as a waitress.

It’s a difficult job, and Y/n has struggled with it, but the hardest part is not the endless knowledge one needs to mix drinks –on the nights Joel takes time off and she has to take his spot behind the bar- or the carrying up to twenty pounds of glasses and drinks and delivering them at the right table without soaking herself or anyone else with copious amounts of alcohol. Any minimum wage worker will tell you the same thing- clients of any kind fucking suck. Especially if you’re a young woman at a dive bar after midnight.

Another thing she’s struggled with is not having too much money, which is why she’s needed multiple jobs in the past, so she has to use public transport- buses specifically, to go to and from work. And that is exactly where she finds herself, a couple hours after midnight, at her bus stop, five minutes from the bar, when she finds a phone which, unbeknownst to her, will flip her world upside down.

It sits on the pavement of the bus stop, limp and sad. The screen is cracked a significant amount, and for a second she figures someone got rid of it and was too much of an asshole to throw it in the trash. But the second that thought crosses her mind, the screen lights up with a concerning text.

dude where the fuck are you?!

The contact reads “Sam”, and Y/n stands over the phone staring at it. She’s concerned. What if the phone’s owner is in trouble? The device may have fallen from their pocket on the pavement and cracked because they were running from someone and never made it home, and now whoever is texting them is worried for their well-being. Anxiety grips her heart.

It’s instinct that brings her to kneel down and pick it up. She can’t possibly know when the owner lost it, or how long the phone has been sitting there, but there’s an overwhelming urge to contact this Sam person and let them know what’s going on. Of course, the voice in Y/n’s head tells her that this all could just be a product of her anxiety, but it beats leaving it there and having it be stolen by a passerby.

Whatever, right? Best case scenario, she contacts the owner, who is perfectly safe and sound, and they take their phone back. She’s not really planning to pocket it. It’s fairly damaged anyways. Her own three year old, beat-up, 100$ phone is in better condition.

The bus arrives, and Y/n picks up the phone and boards it.

As she sits in her usual seat in the back, alone in the bus apart from an elderly man asleep with his head on a window and a cap on his head near the front, she starts speculating, eyes glued to the black device in her hands. Who’s the owner? Who is Sam to them? Perhaps a partner? A friend? How did the owner lose their phone? Why would this Sam sound so concerned, and most importantly, is the owner okay?

The heavy weight of dread weighs her chest at the thought of the phone’s owner being in trouble and without a phone. She must contact Sam immediately.

Hey, is this Sam?

As she awaits for a response, her curiosity is killing her. The intrigued part of her, reasons that she should snoop, it’s alright, she’s only looking for more information about the owner. Like whether or not they’re a woman or a man- which, sadly, matters when you’re walking alone in dark streets like the ones around this area- and perhaps their age –because, again, it matters if they are a teenager or a forty-year old adult.

The lack of passcode indicates someone older, with nothing to hide, or perhaps someone less technologically savvy, again, someone who may not be very young. The lockscreen is the most popular Led Zeppelin icon, and she instantly respects their music taste, and the home screen is some generic western movie from the 90s with Clint Eastwood. The chances of this belonging to someone younger further decline.

There’s a grand total of four downloaded apps in the phone. There’s an email app, a scrabble app, a microphone recorder and a dating app, no other sign of social media. Someone over 18 years old, definitely.

Soon, she’s tapping on the dating app, and opening their profile page. Holy shit, she thinks.

A guy, the tall, dark and handsome kind. Spiky hair and a smolder-like smile, sharp edges everywhere on his face apart from his gentle, olive-shaped and colored eyes. His lips are full, his nose straight, and his eyelashes long, dark and thick. He’s a real-life dreamboat, the kind you see in movies and Cosmopolitan articles about sex. He’s sitting on a black muscle car, a Chevrolet, with his thick thighs barely contained in blue jeans.

Dean Winchester, the app writes. 28. Male. Likes: old cars, beer, hard rock, westerns, she figured that much, bacon burgers. Dislikes: pop music, modern horror movies, uncomfortable beds. Not looking for anything serious, just a night of fun ;), and wow, okay, he sounds a bit like a dick. The very Red-blooded American Male kind, that enjoys BBQs and winking at women from across the bar. She’s had enough of those during her line of work; she can recognize them from a mile away.

Whatever the case, her moral compass couldn’t allow her to pass up on the opportunity to possibly help someone in trouble. She ignores her urge to roll her eyes, and scrolls a little, finding other pictures of the same guy, when suddenly two separate notifications appear, the phone itself vibrating. One is from the app, which has now received a picture from this girl, Jamie, one which she certainly doesn’t plan on opening, seeing as it’s followed by a winky face. The second one is from Sam.

jesus dean how drunk are you

yes it’s sam. your brother? remember?

No, this isn’t Dean, uh.

My name is Y/n. Your brother lost his phone at a bus stop, near a bar.

i should’ve figured. dean rarely ever uses punctuation.

nice to meet you i guess

Nice to meet you, too.

So basically, uhm, I thought you might help me return his phone to him? I got worried, because this was dumped on the sidewalk, I thought he may be in trouble or something.

knowing him he probably dropped it while being too shitfaced to function.

gotta admit i’m impressed though. most people would’ve pocketed it by now.

I mean, it’s not much use to me with such a cracked screen haha.

yeah i guess.

i don’t know about getting it back to him though. i’m in kansas right now so i’m not close by. i don’t think i can help you.

he doesn’t use social media either.

Crap.

What the hell am I supposed to do with this phone then?

keep it probably.

You sure there’s no other way I can reach him?

i mean i can give you his email but i’m not sure he’ll respond.

I’ll take it. Thank you :)

no problem :)

As she looks up the bus stops, and she quickly realizes this is her stop. Throwing profanities loudly enough to wake the older man at the front of the bus, she scrambles for her things, haphazardly thrown in the seat next to her, and gets off the bus. She pats herself down, making sure she hasn’t forgotten anything as the doors of the bus shut, and starts down the road to her apartment complex.

She could probably navigate this road blind. There are many ways to reach the apartment she’s renting from the bus stop, but her favorite goes through the park. It’s a large area, full of big trees with thick foliage and leaves that brown in the fall. The paths are paved and winded, and the park benches are stained with dark wood stain and curve comfortably. She enjoys coming here in evenings she has off, watching the sun descend behind the top of the trees with a good book.

The air smells like oncoming rain now, and with headphones deep in her ears, she walks taking deep breaths and enjoying the clear atmosphere that seems so unlike the roads that surround the park. As soon as she spots the first raindrop falling from the sky, she pulls her hood over her head and smiles.

It’s minutes later, when single drops have picked up to a drizzle, that she gets a sinking feeling, her hair standing up on edge at the back of her neck, shoulders knotting closer to her ears. Someone is close to her.

With the wire pinched between her thumb and index, she pulls one earbud off and pays attention to the surrounding sounds. Sure enough there’s a second pair of footsteps behind her.

Fuck, if she gets kidnapped or attacked right now, she’s fucked. There are no witnesses, and at this time of night screaming for help would be futile. She checks her bag, but her paper spray is nowhere to be found.

Yeah. Definitely fucked.

Her hands go deep in her pockets, going for her phone, but as she hears the footsteps behind her picking up speed along with hers, she panics and grabs Dean’s instead. She doesn’t look for her own, there’s no time for that, so she does the first thing she thinks of.

She texts Sam.

I think I’m being followed.

what?

Yeah

wait what’s going on? are you okay? who’s following you?

I’m walking home from work. I can’t see who it is, but they’re definitely on my tail.

how are you even typing right now??

is there any buildings around? somewhere public to get in?

It’s 3 am. Everything is shut and I’m in the middle of a fucking park, Sam.

Fuck, I’m fucked.

what are you doing at 3 am in the middle of a fucking park then?!

A hand falls on her shoulder and she goes to scream, before she’s quickly spun around. Her free hand is curled in a fist, ready to fall on the attacker’s nose, when they speak.

“Y/n! I thought it was you!”

“Connor?!” She squints and pushes her hair away from her forehead, heart just about ready to fail out of the fright she’s gotten. “Fuck’s sake, dude, what the fuck are you doing sneaking up on me in the middle of the night like this?!” Rain still falls on her, grounding her to the present, the fact she won’t have to fight for her life and corporeal integrity sinking in slowly.

Her neighbor smiles a crooked smile, watching her place a hand over her heart and taking a deep breath. His fluffy blonde hair is damp under the light rain, light green eyes glowing under the street lights. She’s so angry at him right now, she legitimately thought she was gonna die for a second there.

“I’m sorry for scaring you,” he says, dropping his hand from her shoulder. “I didn’t think to call out to you.” A shrug.

“It’s okay,” it’s really not, but there’s no point in staying angry at him. Besides, she figures she’ll be a little safer with him walking next to her all the way back to their apartment complex.

On the way back, they catch up. Connor is back in town after a long week and a half at his sister’s wedding. He’s in a brand new relationship with the guy he’s been pining over for like 9 months now, and he got a job at the bookstore, close to their building, he’s starting next week. He was out for a drink, he offers as an explanation, and was returning home, when he bumped into her. The park is also his favorite route to take.

The key dangles from her hands and finds a home in the lock and twists, while Y/n waves at her neighbor.

“Have a good night, Connor.”

“You too, Y/n.” It’s delivered with a wink and a bright smile.

The motions of dropping her bag by the kitchen counter, dumping the keys in the small bowl and hanging her coat on the hanger are delivered on autopilot in quick succession. Shoes toed off, hair pulled out of her lazy bun, she falls unceremoniously on her thrifted couch, feet suspended on the hand rest. Emmy must be asleep, the only lights on in the house are the fairy lights over the couch, setting a soft glow over the furniture. Y/n sighs. What a day.

Seconds before she falls asleep on the couch, a phone vibrates and it’s definitely not her own. Her eyes snap wide open, and she curses, fumbling with Dean’s device.

The messages are seven, and they all share the same panicked tone. Upon reading them, Y/n facepalms and curses, guilt weighing her down. Poor guy.

y/n?

what’s going on?

are you okay?

y/n

what the hell is going on.

you’re not replying.

please text me if you’re safe.

My God, Sam, I’m so sorry.

It was a neighbor/friend, he sneaked up on me.

you sure know how to fuck me up on a friday night.

I’m genuinely so sorry, Sam, I had no idea it was him.

it’s okay

you were scared.

i am starting to question your choice in friends though.

Y/n grins for the first time that day. It’s wide and full. Sam sounds like a guy she’d hang out with.

Hahahah yeah.

I promise, Connor’s odd, but he means well.

well i have to go

but i’m glad you’re safe

Again, I’m really sorry to make you go through that.

it’s fine really.

Thank you.

Goodnight :)

Night :)

---

Part 2

A/N 2: Tell me how you’re liking the rewrite!

Old Can You See The Stars taglist: @shutupiminlooove @sammysgirl1997 @kymberlytorres @bambi95-blog @demonic-meatball @thekarliwinchester @littlekay15 @li-m-ii @thinspo-isuppose @carryonmywaywarddemigodwitch @ellen-reincarnated1967 @moonlitskinwalker @marichromatic @illuminatus42 @lazy-author @mirandaaustin93 @hauntedsiriel @pilaxia @devilgirlsarah @nobodys-baby-now @captiveties @calamitychaos @midiocris @wordswillscream

Sam taglist @kymberlytorres @theboykingsam @depressed-moose-78 @andi-mendes-barnes @captainmarvelcorps @nerd-in-a-galaxy-far-away @nellachain

#sam winchesterx reader #sam x fem!reader #sam winchester x fem!reader #spn fanfiction #supernatural #spn fanfic #sam x reader

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daveedfanfics · 4 years ago

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right person, wrong time (01)

DESCRIPTION: your new life has started, college, a new apartment, your roommate, your camera, and Oakland. what happens when your girls’ night out changes your life forever? Is it worth it? is this really where you thought you’d be in your future?

WORDS: 2.5k

WARNING: alcohol, weed, cursing

DAVEED X READER-

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“It’s our last day before school starts. Come on we have to have a girls’ night out” jasmine cried out of the shower. Jasmine has been your best friend since you could walk, it was always an adventure with her. She always knew how to get you out of your comfort zone, and that made you love her more. “exactly! What is worse than a hangover on your first day at a new college.” You shouted while curled up on the couch of your comfortable apartment with a blanket wrapped around you as you scrolled trough Netflix on your laptop. “your first class doesn’t even start till 3 PM, come on y/n. Please, for me!”. She had a point any hangover at that point would be bearable for class. “fine. Only cause its you”. You heard a loud scream from the bathroom, you just knew she was dancing in the shower because she got you to break after an hour of convincing you to let loose. About 20 minutes later she was getting out screaming for you to get ready. “dress slutty, but not too slutty if you know what I mean. Ooooo you know what you should wear? That dress your dad bought you for our 21st birthday party. Daddy’s money is gonna get you laid.”

She laughed as she pulled up her dress. You ran to your room searching through your closet for the dress. When you found it, you put it on, and you looked at yourself and agreed mentally with what jas said about it being perfect. You did light makeup because you knew you would need it because of the breakouts on your forehead. You walked out in the living room and you and jasmine stopped and looked at each other, “damn we are fine” you said cheerfully. You and jas did a few runway walks and considered each look to be phenomenal. Jas grabbed the blunt she rolled up while she waited for you and walked down to your car. You smoked it on the way to the club. As you stumbled out of the car you and jas promised each other to not get to drunk. “no shots, fruity drinks only, and we can get tipsy so we can be in the right headspace for the night.” You demanded as jas shot you a glared look and she started laughing but you knew it was only the high. “fine” she answered as you gave her a testing look. You walked in and the confidence you had at the apartment left as you saw all of the gorgeous woman dancing with their friends. You headed to a table while jasmine ordered some drinks for you. you could feel the music in your bones. When she sat down, she looked at you flustered. “what happened to you? You look like you could another blunt.” You said trying to make her ease up. “this guy, I mean a creep at the least. he looked 50 y/n. what does he think this is a nursing home?” you laughed at the remark she made. You sipped on your drinks as you scanned the room, seeing someone looking at jas. “someone seems to find you pretty.” You hinted at the guy. “he is cute” she said getting up walking towards him, leaving you alone to drink. You fiddled with your straw. You felt the seat beside you sink in and decided jasmine had returned. “so, what’s the deal, he thinks you’re too much?” you looked up and your eyes widened as you saw a man with dark skin smiling at you, his head was full of dark tight curls. “oh um, I’m s-sorry I thought you were someone else.” God was he gorgeous. You felt the heat rise in your cheeks whether it was from embarrassment or the man in front of you. “no, no I understand your friend is flirting with my bro over there. Thought she came back already?” he said with a reasonable tone. “so, what’s that name sweetheart?” he questioned you quickly with a grin. “it doesn’t concern you.” You said with a small smile. “oh, I think it does” he said with a smirk. “I’m daveed, now your turn.” Your eyes fell to the now known stranger’s arms in his Oakland t-shirt. His biceps were ripped. You could tell he spent his spare time in the gym. “take a picture it last longer”. He snapped you out of the daydream you were in. “I’m y/n”. you could feel the heat rise up to your face because he caught you starting. “nice to meet you Y/n”. “you as well daveed”. You talked for awhile and learned small things about each other. You felt your phone buzz and looked down at a message from jasmine.

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Text message

Jasmine🤪: hey so sorry but that guy, yeah, his name is Anthony. Mega hot 🥵. But so, I am leaving with him so see you at home tomorrow. Sorry!

y/n🥴: it’s all good i’m chilling with his friend daveed. So so hot, but it’s all good maybe i’ll get lucky too. USE PROTECTION

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You looked down with a face that could either be a smile or a frown. “what’s wrong sweetheart” he said pushing a piece of your hair behind your ear. “oh, nothing jasmine just left without me you know with Anthony. So yeah, I have to go home, and I am a little tipsy so I can’t drive, and my car is on the parking deck.” You said with a small frown. “I haven’t had anything to drink. I can drive you home. And I rode here with Anthony, so I don’t have a ride either. I can just uber home after I drop you off.” “oh no I can’t ask that of you. I’m fine I just need to call an uber and get my car in the morning.” “I can tell your new here, leaving your car alone in Oakland, yeah no not gonna happen. Let’s get you home.” “fine if you insist” you smiled up at him with a flash of red covering your cheeks.

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He walked you up to your apartment and helped you get inside. “thank you, you really didn’t have to do this.” You looked him in the eye. He seemed nervous, that was the first time you had seen him like that. “yeah I should get going though, I have stuff to do tomorrow.” You could feel a frown growing, you kind of wanted him to stay, your buzz from the drinks was gone so you couldn’t blame it on that. You genuinely wanted to spend more time with him. “you could stay if you wanted” you bit down on your bottom of your lip as his eyes widen at the statement that just left your lips. He walked toward you and rested his hand on your cheek and he moved closer to you. You could feel his breathe on your nose. He wasn’t lying about not drinking, his breath still smelt like mint. You stood on your toes to reach his lips and he pressed down on yours. I wasn’t hard, it was rather gentle. Perfectly passed, you knew were the night was headed as he tugged towards the straps of your dress.

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you opened your eyes adjusting to the sunlight. You were about get up and brew yourself a cup of coffee. You looked at the time. 2:16 PM. You started out of bed when an arm restrained you to the bed. “OMG daveed, get up I’m going to be late…daveed wake up.” You shook him until he groaned “what?!” “I need you to go now. I’m going to be late.” He raised a brow and checked the time on his phone. His eyes widen at the time. “fuck I’m late I was sup- I’m sorry y/n I shouldn’t have slept here anyway.” He jumped out of bed grabbing his jeans sliding them on and throwing his shirt over his head and walked to the door but then he paused. “I had a good time last night”He smirked and walked out the door and shut it. You just knew your cheeks were bright red after that comment. You rushed to the bathroom and cleaned yourself from the mess daveed made of you. You looked at all the hickeys covering almost every inch of your body, one way to high and to purple to cover. You jumped in the shower and washed your body and then threw clothes on and concealer to try and cover up the bruises. And left the apartment.

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You rushed into your class, luckily your professor was late for that class. You sat in what looked like the only seat left, which happened to be near the front. You grabbed your laptop out of your bag and grabbed your pen and a notebook and got ready for class. You were looking through your notification on your phone. “I’m sorry I’m late class, I’m professor Diggs.” You looked up at the oddly familiar voice and your eyes widen as you saw your professor standing struggling with his bag. DAVEED?! You started to sink in your seat, as he looked up to the class you saw a hickey that you left under his jaw and clearly you weren’t the only one to notice it. “Diggs nice hickey” a shout from the back of the class caused him to freeze. He looked around for who said it but instead all he found was you trying to hide your face, but more importantly the matching hickey on your jaw. His eyes widen at the sight of you. “yeah funny we get I have a hickey. Okay time for class. I know I am a lot younger than most professors, but I promise you I am qualified to teach you how to capture masterpieces through a lens. You will learn the difference between a good and great picture. Now let’s get started everybody take out your syllabus and let’s go over the Curriculum of the year”. His eyes seemed frustrated but confused at the sight of you in his class. He searched your eyes for an answer, but nothing was given. Throughout class you just avoided eye contact with daveed. As he walked through the aisle when he passed you, he slipped you a note. You couldn’t find it in you to open it, so you just slide it under you laptop.it felt like a lifetime before class ended and it was like living hell. You tried to hide your thoughts about last night and you knew you had to talk to Jas. When you packed your bag, you found the note and when people around you walked out you opened it. It read “meet me in my office we need to talk”. You finished packing up slowly and you walked towards his office. You had a lump in your throat when he told you “come in”. you expected a him to yell at you, to be pissed. “you left out a lot about your life when we were at the bar.” He chuckled. You looked up at him when he said this because it confused you. “well you did too, a simple hey I am your teacher, lets fuck. Would have sufficed.” He looked at you with a look you knew nothing good would come from. “y/n, I am sorry, I never would have come onto you if I knew you were my student.” He pleaded. “I wouldn’t have either if I knew you were my teacher” he laughed. “but this, us, can never happen again. It was inappropriate, and I could lose my job over this. I am sorry if made you feel uncomfortable in class at all. You have to understand I will not be able to be a good teacher to you because of this.” He demanded. You were confused. “you are my teacher, how am I supposed to pass if you won’t teach me. That’s unfair. You can’t let last night’s stupid mistake make you not teach me. I am passionate about photography. It is my everything.” He looked at you with frown, “you think last night was stupid mistake”. “ye- wait what”. “It was inappropriate, yes, but It was still fun. I really enjoyed it. I just can’t lose my job because I enjoyed my time with a student. Please understand. I will try my best to teach you, but I do not want to make you uncomfortable.” “I’ll be fine I just I have always gone to my teacher about stuff and I want to still be able to do that my teachers always helped me through my troubles, especially when it came to my classwork.” You laughed. “so, I’ll see you Thursday y/n”“yeah I guess you will, bye daveed… I mean professor diggs.” You were kind of embarrassed by the mess up. “if you want me to be there for you in your troubles, we will have to be friends so, its daveed” he gave you a smile. “i- yes sir” “no, none of that sir shit, I among old yet when I turn 60 you can call me that.” “I called you sir when you were fucking me, you didn’t have a problem then”. You joked. His eyes widen, “out! Now before we get caught.”

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“you slept with your teacher!” Jas screamed into her phone. “yes, now will you shut up before people hear you on my phone.” You looked around for people trying to nose their way into your conversation. “y/n when I told you to let loose this was not what I had in mind. Oh, by the way Anthony invited us to a party he is throwing with his friends.” “daveed isn’t going to be there right? Because I can’t end up in bed with him again. My legs can’t handle that again, I barely could walk this morning. And you should have seen what this man did to my skin, I have never had so many hickeys placed on me. I of course left some on him and he dint even bother covering them, a student called him out on one I left on his jaw, and the dude didn’t even hide what it was he just said ‘yeah I have a hickey we get it’ like the fuck.” “hey, I got to go Anthony is calling me.” “okay bye much love.”

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“hey, you’re that new girl in professor diggs class, right?” a guy ran up to you. “yeah why?” you worried he over heard your conversation. “look what we have here. Looks like diggs wasn’t the only one to get some last night.”

#daveed diggs #daveed x reader #right person wrong time #first time #fanfic #imagine #daveed fic #daveed imagine #hamilton #hamilsquad

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hecohansen31 · 5 years ago

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To Kill A King

Ivar+Saxon Princess! Reader

The Veiled Bride:

Though his grip is so tight And it's choking me I will find a way out Of this loyalty

“To Kill A King” by Hungry Lucy

First Chapter (1)

(A/N): Hello there, lovelies!

Since I got quite the positive feedback, I immediately felt like continuing this story and I hope that I didn’t displease you with this chapter that has a lot of infodump!

As always, feedback of any kind is welcome, any reblog (with something written)/comment and heart goes straight to my heart and to willingness to write more about these two.

Also I wanted to point out that there might be some historical inaccuracies for which I am rather sorry, and if you have any better suggestion to solve them please let me know!.

I hope you’ll enjoy this chapter, have a nice reading!

SUMMARY: The day of your marriage has finally come and now that your husband is not simply a stranger to you, you have yet to discover if he would make a good husband... or not...

WORDS: 11,6 K

WARNINGS: Arranged Marriage, Mention of Domestical Abuse and Rape, Violence and Strong Themes.

Your father had been the one who had put an end to the feast, eyeing the complete depravation the Vikings were slowly bringing in the room and even more annoyed by the gentle tone you were reserving for your soon-to-be-husband.

His eyes chastising every move and even more every touch, appalled by the fact that you were talking with the man in his tongue and not your glorious one.

But you had to admit that the feast had quelled a few of your fears, since Ivar had turned to be a proper man, with more strength than you would have given him account of and a mind that was as sharp as the dagger he held to his belt.

And although your husband had seemed much better than the rumors, you couldn’t put aside the thought that he was ‘heathen’, as he has admitted, and that he was a godless brute on the battlefield, who had killed many of your fellow Saxons.

This didn’t stop you from being feverish and dreamy for the entire time you rode back to the castle, being sheltered by your sisters who wanted to know about what Ivar had talked with you, if he had been gentle or arrogant and if he had shown any indication of being ‘an horrible husband’.

Abigail had quieted your sister’s worry with a little smirk, even more when you had blushed.

‘Horrible husband wouldn’t show themselves from the beginning… if they did, we, women, certainly would never ever marry’.

And this brought you back to think that to you Ivar was still a stranger.

A beautiful but dangerous stranger.

Even more when your father, once at the castle, reminded you that you would have to spy on your own husband and bring back the news.

Your father’s tone had been harsh and hadn’t admitted any reply, probably still a bit shaken by how easily you had let the heathen in your mind at the feast, but Alfred had softened the talk, thanking you again for ‘your sacrifice’.

‘A true martyr, princess (Y/N)’ he had even bowed himself to you, but you couldn’t help but shiver at his choice of words.

He had called you a ‘martyr’ as if you were doing this willingly and to defend the preciousness of anything holy, not to give your father and him a chance to defeat the invasion of Vikings who had come to avenge their beloved father.

In the end, they weren’t so different.

‘Goodnight’ you father had excused you, but had ordered two guards to follow you, enough to make you uneasy and unable to fall asleep, shielding yourself at the royal chapel connected to your castle.

Due to the late hour, there wasn’t anybody there, except the priest, the one who had baptized you and had known all your life, enough for you to make a smile shine on your face as Father Peter smirked softly at you, making you feel again as the child who asked him about your favorite saints.

“... ohh (Y/N), my child” he welcomed you, sending the guards a rather chastising look, as he immediately took in their weaponry “… and please don’t bring those weapons in my sanctuary”.

“But… we are meant to keep the princess under strict protection!” protested one, the younger one, probably wanting to make a good impression on your father, as the other quickly held him off, in order for him not to trespass the threshold of the sacred chapel, as you instead took a step forward to Father Peter, asking for a last absolution of all your sins.

‘… Father I sadly think that from tomorrow I won’t be able to worship God properly” you mumbled under your breath, as the old priest brought you to the confessional booth, bringing you far away from the guards spying eyes.

“True believers always find the chance to pray to our good and forgiving Lord” he replied sternly, because if you had known one thing about the old man was that his faith was faultless and what gave him the strength to go on with his small and wounded body “… and even if you can’t, God will accept you as a martyr of the faith, for what you are doing for this country”.

“So, you think that it is indeed proper for my father to send me off to a man I have never met, who worship the ancient gods and is known for his fury and recklessness in battle?”.

Although you knew the old priest couldn’t disregard your father’s orders you were looking forwards to somebody who wouldn’t simply tell you that it was your sole duty to the faith to get married and spy on prince Ivar.

“… is it proper and holy for God to give me a husband who is rumored to have killed many and many Christians?”.

“Oh, my child” huffed softly the man, as you arrived at the confessional “… didn’t our beloved Saint Orsola convert her pagan husband? She was also meant to marry a heathen, stranger to her customs, but they fell in love, my child”.

A blush covered your cheeks at the thought of your favorite tale.

Your mother had been called Orsola so when you were nothing but a child and she was pregnant with Abigail she would tell you the story behind her name and after she had passed away you had held onto that story with all your strength in an effort to make your mother stay with you.

“My father wants to make a martyr of me” you mumbled as you slipped in the jeweled confessional, a testimony of your father’s faith and wealth, and a secret deal with the old priest not to put religion before of his duty in the kingdom “… doesn’t martyrdom entail death? Why does God want to sacrifice me?”.

“We don’t know what God wants from all of us till he asks it” he replied, his tone stone cold and serious and you thought that maybe you had challenged him a bit too far “… but I don’t think that God is asking you to die for him, you survived and went through so many bad moments in your young life…”.

Your gaze became extremely caged at the memory of what the priest meant: your mother’s death and your father’s disinterest for you.

Father Peter had been always surprised by your curiosity and by the way you would be wandering in the chapel just simply to invent your own story of holiness and martyrdom.

“… I am scared, father” you mumbled, a chill running down your spine as you remembered the intense look you had felt on your back, when you had turned from Ivar to join you father to your horses, as the feast finished: there was a strange longing in his blue eyes, which you recognized in yourself.

It was the longing of a lonely child.

“There is nothing wrong with being scared, my sweet bird” he comforted you as he himself adjusted on the other side of the confessional booth “… marriage is difficult for various reasons, one that comes from a different culture has so many more difficulties, but you have the abilities to survive and cherish”.

You couldn’t help but feel like that was a lie, or at least you didn’t understand what these abilities Father Peter talked about were, exactly as you didn’t understand Ivar’s interest for you.

You were a dull portrait if you stood against your sisters’ beauty and livelihood.

You weren’t as smart as Kathleen.

You weren’t as nice and courteous as Abigail.

You just had your vast imagination and your gentleness, two qualities which wouldn’t have been useful in the kingdom of war.

“… now, my lost sheep, tell me all your worst deeds”.

Half an hour and five ‘Hail Mary’s later you were in bed, holding the covers to your chest as you already saw the pink dusk of twilight appearing behind the little holes of the heavy curtains in your room.

You couldn’t help but fall asleep with the thought that you hadn’t properly confessed all your sins to the old Pether, a bit ashamed for having kept to yourself the feverish emotion youhad felt towards the Viking prince, flowing through you in a sinful way that made you think that maybe… maybe you would have been a martyr in the throes of love.

---

You were waken up by two handmaids, smiling brightly and telling you ‘it was the great day’ and you were thankful that your father had accepted your proposal of having new handmaids for your day, since you were sure that the ones who had known you since you were a simple child would have cried alongside you.

These two instead did their job, chatting gingerly, probably not having been told who you would be marrying.

You just chatted back, although your voice didn’t hold any interested tone, since you couldn’t help but feel uninvolved by the entire process of your preparation as if it was a beautiful painting you were seeing and not yourself.

Your father had punished your arrogance of the previous night by not allowing your sisters to take part in the preparations, since they were busy ‘with their own dresses and jewels’.

And although you were a bit calmer due to having discovered your husband not to be monster and for Peter’s comforting words, you couldn’t help but feel a dreadful sensation in the pit of your stomach, hiding under your heart and slowly consuming it, speeding his beat.

Your hands grew cold and rigid and when you were helped in putting the dress you were thankful your father had also allowed you to wear a simpler dress to match the Viking ones, most importantly without a corset, falling tight onto your curves and ending up in a soft gown, all painted of white with small inserts of gold and silver silk to show your royal status.

Alongside the small crown that was pushed on your hand, entwinned with your mother’s veil.

Kathleen should have worn it before you, but Fate had wanted otherwise.

The veil was long and the only acceptable exception to the Viking model that had been allowed, falling down on your face and properly shielding it as it formed loose waves on your dress, almost shadowing your view and you had to be helped with it, both because of its length and both because of its thickness.

And once you were out you let it hang back, helped this time by your sister, so that you could properly hug them tight, feeling Kathleen release a light sob on your shoulder, as Abigail whispered softly about how beautiful you looked.

“You look like an angel” and you bowed lightly your head, red at the compliment.

You had to admit that you felt quite beautiful yourself, although you wouldn’t have compared yourself to an angel, feeling more like Sif, Thor’s beautiful wife with since the veil was encrusted with golden threads, that brought your hair to shine like wheat, exactly like hers.

“… you look like a beautiful prisoner” muttered beneath her breath Kathleen, making you take a sharp intake of breath which brought you to lower your head lightly, shifting your expression from happiness to sadness in a few minutes.

“ ‘Leen” you whispered lightly, meanwhile your sister refused to take another look at you “… it isn’t your fault”.

“But it isn’t also right!” she exclaimed, and you couldn’t help but agree.

But there wasn’t much that you could do about it, except accept your Fate with a smile and your hands open for whatever it brought.

“I know” your tone agreed with her, but your eyes were firm “… but talking like this won’t make this change… please, ‘Leen don’t make this much more difficult than it already is”.

And your sister succumbed to your last plead, hugging you lightly as you were brought apart by two guard, bringing a beautiful lady alongside themselves, a few years older than you and your sister, and you immediately recognized her by the expensive jewels she was wearing.

“Lady Claudia!” you bowed lightly as she did the same, right as she was in front of you.

She was the concubine of your father’s main advisor, a beautiful girl that looked like a jeweled princess whenever she would show herself up at court.

She had bore the advisor a son, enough to make her a lady with the blessing of your father.

Still you didn’t understand her presence there.

Was she being sent to wish you her congratulations?

Your marriage had been kept a secret, since your father secretly disapproved the thought of one of his ‘blessed’ daughters marrying a heathen, so you highly doubted she had come there without your father’s “suggestion”.

“Princess (Y/N)” she welcomed you as well, saluting your sister and then gently moving closer to you, in order to speak with you more privately and you allowed her, moving the veil away from you “… I wanted to come and congratulate on your wedding, and… discuss about some private matters which might concern your first night of marriage”

You immediately blushed, lightly nodding your head, meanwhile you adjusted the veil to shield you.

“Lady Claudia I’ll gladly enjoy a talk with you, although I don’t think that we could use too much time…”.

“I won’t take too much of it” she immediately replied, adjusting her hand onto your waist to lead you back inside but as your sisters stepped in to join you, they were promptly locked out by the lady.

“What…?” you asked worried, looking at the lady, who smirked softly at you, before sitting on top of your bed as you felt your sisters pounding against the doors.

“What I am going to say is meant to be heard only by future brides” she smiled at you softly, caressing the soft fabric of your bed “… I wouldn’t want to taint your sisters’ innocence”.

“And what about mine?” you muttered, not knowing whether you should trust that woman or not.

“if I can speak freely… that is something that your husband will do, tonight”.

The knowledge brought your face to quickly move itself in a frown, making you still in your steps as the other woman took in your nervousness.

“… princess (Y/N), it’ll be over sooner than you can expect” she promised you, but you weren’t in the slightest convinced, although you pushed yourself to sit beside her “… it won’t hurt you too much, if you do as I say”.

And she had told you about how it would go, how it was meant to hurt you because it would breach something inside you and that was when you would need relax your legs and body.

‘Don’t tighten around him, it’ll only make the situation worse’ she had continued, and then suggested ‘… once he is done and his seed is in you, make sure to keep something under your waist and your legs pushed up, so that it could take its seat in yourself… and soon you’ll be pregnant”.

The sole thought of finding yourself pregnant froze you even more on the spot and the grip of your fist tightened, as the tips of your fingers became white.

And Lady Claudia saw through this.

“… if you don’t want to end up pregnant, there is an herb that you might use: boil it as tea and it’ll make you bleed…” but Lady Claudia didn’t seem convinced “… but being pregnant might actually help you: men don’t hit pregnant women”.

You knew from indirect experience that wasn’t true, but lightly nodded, still you noted down the name of the herb.

You felt too young to marry, a child… it seemed so sudden that you would have preferred to bleed than to carry it.

Even more in your father’s damned plan.

“… if you don’t have any questions, I’ll blow you my goodbyes and will go to pray for you, my princess” she said, as she gripped your hands and pushed them in her lap, welcoming them there, as you felt yourself shift at the sudden contact “… it isn’t always so painful, sweet child”.

“How was yours?” you hadn’t meant to be so blunt, but the other woman didn’t seem to mind it, softly leaving your hands and getting up, adjusting her dress as she smoothed its wrinkles and pushed away the dust.

“Painful, I didn’t do it with a man that was kind with me” she spoke and you couldn’t help but see a bit more than the algid woman she had shown herself to be for the entire conversation “… he took it from me, without asking”.

There was so much pain in her words, that you gently held a hand out to her, in a small attempt to console her.

“I’ll pray that prince Ivar will not be like that with you”.

“I am not… he was gentle and kind with me at the banquet” you couldn’t help but feel a bit flustered at that memory, those beautiful blue eyes hunting for your smile, as you chastised him for his teasing ways “… but he is a Viking”.

“… and my first mas was Christian” she surprised and you couldn’t help but feel a bit shocked of the revelation: you knew that also Christian men were awful, there wouldn’t be wars, if they weren’t, but to denounce one so openly.

It took courage.

“Thank you again, lady Claudia” you muttered softly, as you made sure to look at her in the eyes “… and I am sorry if I…”.

“Your curiosity is not a fault, my dear” she simply replied, looking at you sweetly “:.. it is what makes you stand out, never ever let anybody make it a fault”.

And with a silent swish of her dress she ran out of the room, leaving you with that dreaded feeling of nothing biting your chest even more painfully.

And the surprises weren’t over.

Once the veil was again on adjusted on your head you were meant to ride in a chariot till the settled camping and there you would be married off according to Ivar’s gods.

And you were meant to be escorted there with your sisters and your father, but the man didn’t seem to be anywhere near and as you asked the guards they didn’t answer to you, till an handsome man appeared and moved to you, revealing himself to be bishop Heahmund.

You had thought he would have been too busy fighting the few rebel Vikings eft, but he was there and he looked at you, bowing and kissing your hand, although you didn’t understand his purpose there.

“Princess (Y/N), you look as gorgeous as your mother the day of her own wedding” you couldn’t help but be choked by the way he mentioned your mother “… we shall go, shall we not?”.

“I… we were waiting for father…” it was a weakness to call him ‘father’ and not ‘king’, but you thought you could be allowed to show yourself to be weak before you left your kingdom for… ever.

“Your father sadly won’t be walking you up the altar” proclaimed Heahmund, making you almost stumble on your own feet “… he has been taken aback by some important matters with king Alfred, I’ll be the one walking with you, your father thought it would be more fitting”.

And there you understood: your father hadn’t simply punished you withholding your sister, but also his presence.

Although you hadn’t a steady relationship with him, he knew how much it would have meant for you to have him walk you down the aisle, and he must have thought that he would punish you through leaving you alone, on your wedding day.

You were thankful for the veil as it shielded you from letting Heahmund see your hurt expression and you nodded and quickly got yourself in the chariot, adjusting the dress all around yourself, in what seemed like a loose hug of fabric, but still left you cold.

“… I’ll also remain with you, my princess, your father has told me about the plans to have you spy on prince Ivar…”.

That brought you to painfully swallow a breath, meanwhile you set your eyes on the window, hoping that it would bring you out of that akward conversation, to a place where there was no prince Ivar and you weren’t a princess but a beautiful bird, flying away from humans who wanted to cage you.

“… he thinks that you might need a friendly face there, alongside somebody who’ll protect you…”.

“It’s generous of him, isn’t it?” your voice dripped with sarcasm but Heahmund didn’t seem to mind it too much attention, adjusting himself beside you, in a small seat, since most of it was taken by the silk of your gown.

“… whenever you’ll feel unsafe, my princess, you can come immediately to me”.

You just wanted to turn to him and roll your eyes, but you simply pushed the tiny crown holding the veil further your hair, meanwhile you shifted away from him in the chariot, remembering that it took you at least two hours to arrive there, last night, according to the way the sun had shifted.

And two hours of Heahmund talking were your worst nightmare, in that moment.

You almost wished not to have forsaken the thought of bringing a book with you, worried about where you might leave it, so that you could have at least used it to calm your nerves.

“…I’ll obviously let you confess all your sins to me, if you have any need”.

“I already did, last night, and I don’t think that this morning I sinned more than simply wanting for a drop of milk more”.

Heahmund tried to laugh at your grim comment, as you shifted yourself to face the empty seat in front of you, imagining Abigail and Kathleen with you, in the carriage.

You had never been truly apart from them and the thought that from tomorrow you’d be forever apart…

It hurt you much more than you were willing to admit.

And then alongside your sister, shifted the image of Ivar: he had been a rather talented host, making you laugh and frown at him, as he made small talk with you, with the premise of exercising your Norse, although he laughed out loud whenever you would mispronounce a word.

Would he have been a good husband as much as he was a good host?

You hoped so, as you clutched your fingers tight in your hold and Heahmund finished his discourse, unaware you hadn’t heard half of it, as you fantasized about what it would have felt to be somebody’s wife.

Maybe you should have confessed him that feverish rush that went through you at that thought of the Viking prince.

“… your mother would have been proud of you” uttered Heahmund, the tone softening as everybody’s did whenever they talked about your mother: she had passed away a year after she had had Abigail, some complications appearing during her last pregnancy had brought her in a tired state that had obliged her in bed for entire days.

You were barely five and you didn’t understand much other than seeing your mother becoming as white as snow whenever she would be left alone, and although you hadn’t understood back then concepts such as ‘illness’ and ‘death’, you had known deep down that something horrible was going to happen to her

“I don’t know” you dared to speak up “… mother would have wanted me happy on my wedding day, married to somebody I loved and who respected me”.

You didn’t know where this aggressive streak had appeared.

Kathleen had always been the one who would have fought even a chair for bumping into her, whereas you were nothing more than the child that hid in the royal library till the end of your father’s rage.

Heahmund turned to you, surprised. and moved to take one of your hands, probably to comfort you, but you moved them away, gently passing them onto the leather of the seat.

“… maybe she should have been the one who lived and not my father”.

“That’s pure blasphemy!” exclaimed the bishop and you turned to him, finding that he had a boiling rage under his eyes, but unlike your father his hands stuck onto his body and didn’t dare to threaten you.

You weren’t sure if it was because he was an honorable man, or he had been instructed not to give the prince ‘spoiled goods’.

“… my mother would have been there beside me in the chariot and would have fought against the heathens” you spoke out again, but your voice more a whisper, lost in a fantasy you knew would never come true “… she would have loved me”.

And this time the bishop wasn’t able to reply.

Because in the end, it was the truth.

---

As you arrived, you were helped out of the chariot by Bishop Heahmund and rid onto a horse with him, since the chariot was to be left a bit away from the actual place to ensure the heathens’ and your safety.

The horse ride was silent, something for which you were thankful, and it permitted you to feel the air on your face in one last illusion of freedom you would lose as soon as you would dismantle from the horse.

You were glad that the Saxon court hadn’t been invited and only your sisters and the bishop stood as the last memory of a culture you wouldn’t belong anymore by tomorrow.

The crowd of Vikings already made the place too crowded.

And your dress became painfully tight around your chest, as Heahmund brought his hand in yours, gently gripping it.

You let him lead you through the small natural clearing they had chosen for your marriage, the open air reddening your cheeks, as you moved attentive to your long dress to avoid stumbling into it.

Ivar waited impatiently on his crutches, something told you that not only that wait was boring but also painful for him and tried not to drag this too long since you felt like he had already suffered enough.

And pain made men angry.

And he wasn’t an exception.

His gracious smile was now twisted in an annoyed frown and you couldn’t help but think about what you had displeased him in, as you always did when your father had a similar frown.

Beside him stood his brothers: the big bear, the two who had escorted you in and then beside them were two figures unknown to you, although you remembered them from the feast, but hadn’t heard of their names.

They were both men of your father’s age, their faces inked with tattoos, one with longer hair in a beautiful braid and a small crown atop his head.

He wore ceremonial clothes of a daunting color, whereas the one beside him matched him in some traits, enough to also make you perceive them as brother, but he had something darker to his brother’s arrogance.

Again, you thanked the veil which hid your small investigation, moving your gaze to your side where your sister stood, both in elegant Saxon fashion, although Kathleen’s gown seemed to be lighter than it was intended, almost matching yours.

She had a small smile on her face, although you knew it wasn’t of happiness, and Abigail had a more naïve smirk, looking at you amazed again.

Probably she was imagining that you were indeed an angel who had come down on Earth to convert a pagan prince.

Sadly, it wouldn’t have gone that way.

As your eyes shifted away from your sisters, the sight too painful for you, you moved onto the woman who would be officiating the ritual, something which surprised you.

From what you had gathered from your northern servant, Vikings allowed women alongside men on both the battlefield and positions of power, but you hadn’t expected them to also officiate ritual-

The woman that officiated yours was dauntingly beautiful, although old age wrinkled her face a bit, in a gentle way that made you take a sharp breath as you saw what was next to her, in a small basin: blood.

You had known something about the bonding ritual, and you had also been taught that blood was an important ingredient for an healthy ‘Viking wedding’, but you hadn’t expected to see it shown that bluntly, but tried to stand your ground as you were finally in front of the rudimental altar.

You couldn’t help but think about a completely different wedding, set up in the most beautiful chapel of your reign, everything golden and painted in a mixture of saints and devils: that’s how a Saxon wedding would have looked like.

And looking back at the beautiful nature you didn’t certainly regret it.

The ritual finally started as Heahmund lifted your veil from your face, pushing it onto your back, creating a beautiful tray as your crown lightly shone when it caught the light of the sun.

Ivar wasn’t wearing any jewelry, but he didn’t look any less handsome or regal than you and you couldn’t help but feel as always as a pretty doll with heavy jewels.

Heahmund sent you a last look, leaving your hand as he shot you a meaningful look which you didn’t know if you should have taken as ‘be careful’ or ‘do what you can do to make us win’, and then moved his eyes over onto Ivar, this time his gaze wasn’t as soft as with you, and you caught with the tail of your eyes his dark eyes painting themselves of a battle fury.

And with the smirk he gifted him, Ivar certainly hadn’t mistaken the message.

You faced softly the woman officiating the ritual, nodding lightly, and she started, as if she was expecting you to begin, chanting lightly in Norse, the pronunciation too fast that you couldn’t help but lose yourself a bit, but kept on remembering yourself to keep your body steady and hide any emotion, since the veil wasn’t hiding your face anymore.

You tried to relax yourself, as you moved around your feet in a more comfortable position, stealing glances to Ivar and tried to understand whether he was in pain or not, but he had modeled his face in a frown which you didn’t understand.

You couldn’t help but almost feel ashamed that he had shut you out.

The woman continued the discourse slowing it enough that you finally were able to follow her, and were amazed by the tells she told, before proceeding to link the two of you together, reaching out for the blood in the basin, gently splashing a bit on Ivar’s face, who was emotionless, except for a little bow to the woman.

And then she moved to you, a light smirk on your face and you commanded your body not to shrink at the liquid which accidentally also went in your mouth, making you grimace at the taste of it, but you willed yourself not to choke on it, proceeding to sink your nails in your palm, to keep calm.

There was this strange conviction going through your body, one last moment of faithful desperation, that if anything went smoothly and perfectly, Ivar’s gods and yours would have awarded you.

So, you kept yourself upright and nodded to the woman who then proceeded to dip two rings in the blood, as you spied Ivar’s family, trying to understand whether your ‘courage’ had won you any favor and both the big bear and the bigger of the other two seemed to have a genuine smile of happiness, meanwhile the smaller had a bored expression on his lips, making you smirk lightly.

At least you weren’t the only one dreading this wedding.

As Ivar took the ring, the slippery consistence of the blood brought it to slip, indeed, between his hands, falling on the grass.

Although you were well aware of the unholiness of such an omen, you immediately rushed to raise it, not wanting Ivar to tire himself, but a scream of frustration immediately stopped and you were impaled by Ivar’s anger, shining as brightly as a well-kept sword, and you immediately raised from your crouched position, justifying your distance from Ivar as a move to keep your balance.

But in reality, you were scared.

Lady Claudia’s story flashing through your eyes, and for a moment you just wanted nothing more than to turn again and run as fast as your legs would have taken you, because in Ivar’s anger there was a predatory stillness that brought fear coursing through your veins.

You swallowed a tight gulp as Ivar painfully crouched down and pushed himself up, his moan of pain the only sound in a crowd that had grown still and silent since the falling of the ring, which was placed without any grace on your finger, a gesture which hurt you even more than the careless contact.

Would he have touched you like that on your first night?

A shiver brought you to gently envelop yourself in your arms, some blood lightly dripping onto your dress staining, but you didn’t give it too much thought, stilling your hands to help yourself to put Ivar’s ring onto his finger.

If you had also failed …

…you didn’t know… what would have happened…

As you focused your gaze away from Ivar, you stole the sight of the other two unknown men on his side: the first one hadn’t dropped his arrogant smirk, but the other…

… the entire posture of his body had seemed to be still in the position of helping Ivar with the ring, meanwhile his eyes searched your face and for a minute you met them, a pity glance was sent to you.

And you moved your head to divert the fact that you had caught it, immediately slipping the ring on Ivar’s finger, with trembling lights, retreating them soon enough in your safe hold.

The woman smiled at you both and then a scream raised up from the crowd, effectively shocking you as every man and woman joined in in something that almost felt like a calling to you.

And then you understood that you had just signed yourself over to all of them.

---

You were secretly thankful for the banquet, since you couldn’t help but feel weakened by the absence of food in your body, again fasting due to nervousness.

But the feast was also useful to look around for who the Vikings truly were.

They almost seemed like Saxon in their joy.

A hand brought you back to the reality of the noisy exchange of food as your sister Kathleen gently sent you a worried look, probably since she had called out to you and you hadn’t answered her.

She had discarded the gown she was wearing the moment the ‘run of the bride’ had been announced.

Turns out you hadn’t been the only one informed about Norsemen’s traditions, and she had been burning up for a chance to prove to them that you, Saxons, weren’t weak creatures, and had done so when your father wasn’t there to witness her own savagery, challenging the brothers of your husband.

She had won, obviously and she had been sat on your right, meanwhile at your left sat Ivar, matching the hand where the bloodied ring was still shaking lightly on your finger, bringing a memory of the ceremony whenever the cold metal would clink against the table or burn with its coldness your hand.

“… is everything alright?” she asked softly “… we could tell them that you aren’t feeling well… and….”.

“Thank you for the concern, but I am perfectly alright” you comforted her, brushing softly your hand against hers, as you searched the inked man who had witnessed your wedding’s accident.

You still didn’t understand if his pity was a good thing or not.

But with no alleys you couldn’t be picky.

“… I might have to call the servants to bring us more water” joked Kathleen making you smile lightly, meanwhile your gaze continued its search, focusing on Abigail who was speaking to a Viking woman, congratulating her on the food.

Then your eyes focused on their own on Ivar and you couldn’t help but let out a small breath as you adjusted yourself, still burned by his coldness.

Somebody might have thought that you had almost slapped him with the way he had reacted when the ring had fallen on the ground.

You hadn’t meant to disrespect him and the childish withholding of any words towards you made you even more nervous, even more at the thought that you would have to share a bed with him very soon.

As if attracted by your gaze he came back to the table, having had to cheer up with some older Earls, who turned to you and raised their horns to you, as you did the same, with a small smile, knowing exactly how Ivar had justified your absence with them.

‘My wife is shy, wouldn’t want to scare her’.

Well he had.

And he seemed to realize it as you lightly moved a bit closer to Kathleen when he sat on the chair again, a scowl again forming on his face, but you were beyond relieved when he finally spoke to you, just as you were turning to Kathleen to ask her for more water.

“… you look gorgeous” the whisper burned the fear away from your veins and made you turn slowly to him, trying to keep yourself composed, not wanting to seem like a puppy happy at the first compliment he gave you.

Even more when he had been so downright awful with you.

“… like Frejya?” you mumbled, adjusting the veil behind you”… because I personally thought I looked more like Sif”.

“Are you comparing me to Thor?” he replied, although he was still scowling it wasn’t difficult to guess he was hiding a light smirk under that frown, mirth in his voice.

“No, husband you are Loki” you retorted, and something sparkled in those eyes, which lightly moved onto your lips.

He hadn’t kissed you after the wedding and you had been relieved by it.

But you wouldn’t know what you would do if he wanted to kiss you right now.

The conversation had certainly warmed your heart, but you didn’t feel any comforted after Ivar’s show.

“… then you are Sigyn, Loki’s faithful wife” he spoke, making you quirk an eyebrow in interest at him, as he slowly came to realization you didn’t know of Sigyn “… apparently I found something your servant hasn’t told you”.

“There is much she hasn’t” such as the fact that Vikings men could have a discreet silver tongue.

Your sister beside you grew agitated and you softly caressed one of her knees under the table, shifting your attention to Ivar, as if you were expecting the story, but the sweet moment was quickly destroyed by the presentation of gifts.

Each Earl and warlord had something for both you and your husband: the most common gifts were weapons for your husband and clothes for you, alongside jewels, and you were relieved that at least that hadn’t changed from your culture to the Viking one.

Then came the turn of the family exchange of gifts: your father and Ivar had agreed that your sister would give their gifts to him, whereas his brothers would take care of yours.

Your choice had quickly moved on weapons, knowing all too well that it was both a useful and welcomed gift: Kathleen had in her arms almost lulling it a wonderful exemplar of sword that she had claimed for herself the same moment she had seen it and had muttered.

‘Why do we have to give it to the barbarian? He’ll make a sacrilege of this beauty’ and you hadn’t known whether she was more annoyed with giving up the sword or the fact that it would have been probably left unused.

Beside her Abigail had a throwing axe, this time costumed the way Vikings used it, thanks to the collaboration of many soldiers who had described the cruel weapon to them in order to recreate it, preciously decorated with gems, hence a gift that couldn’t be used for anything more than show.

A clear sentence from your father to Ivar: I’ll have my peace and you’ll have your own treasure.

Ivar seemed to appreciate both of them, thanking your sisters in your tongue, meanwhile you shifted, as his brothers approached you, bowing in a teasing attempt at imitating the bows your sisters had donned to you and Ivar.

“Princess (Y/N) may you like our gifts” and the taller one moved first offering you what looked like an elegant cloth, still thick enough to be warm and soft e under your touch as you were unable to stop yourself from tasting with your fingers “.. my wife says that one thing that can never lack in a new home is warmth, and this is a blanket I hope will keep you and my brothers that”.

He had a smug smirk that clearly inquired that the blanket wouldn’t be the only thing that would keep you warm, but you smiled graciously, thanking him, thankful that Ivar also joined you in your thanks finally revealing his name to you: Ubbe.

And after him came Hvitserk, his present was definitely smaller and you were surprised as it revealed itself to be a book written in old Norse, which you found difficult to read since although you were able to speak, the different alphabet brought you a bit of difficulty, but you appreciated the challenge.

“… this is a warm welcome from our culture, sister” the way he said the last word was warm enough and the smirk that belonged to it was blissfully gentle, and you couldn’t help but feel a bit comforted and thanked him as well.

His name sounded foreign on your lips and Ivar laughed lightly at your pronunciation, gently repeating the name for you, as you clashed your teeth for the harsh syllables in it

Ivar laughed again, his laugh making you feel a bit ashamed of your ignorance, as Hvitserk seemed fighting with himself about whether he should have joined his brother or his newly acquired sister.

“Just call him Hvitty” suggested Ivar once his laugh quieted and Hvitserk sent him a light glare as Bjorn moved to present his gift “… or dog, since he is like one of those”.

Although you had nicknamed Bjorn ‘big bear’, you didn’t find any similarities between a dog and Hvitserk, but simply mumbled a quick apology to Ivar for your mispronounce, as the man turned with a light smirk to you.

“I was laughing because it’s adorable” and with a squeak he mimicked your tone, making blush lightly, meanwhile you retorted ‘that you sounded nothing like that!’.

He simply laughed louder.

And the sight of it brought relief to your heart.

“… I see that you already fight like an old-married couple” spoke Bjorn, the ‘big bear’, making you lightly push away from Ivar to face him, with your head bowed in a silent apology, as Ivar stood straight against him and you followed attentively the exchange.

“Would you know something brother? What about your marriage? You never let your bride grow old… don’t you…”.

Bjorn didn’t let the suggestion hit him and gently focused onto you, offering the elegant casket he had with himself, the wood a dark black that got you to examine it with trembling hands as a beautiful smell appeared from under it.

And when you opened it you found it to be revealing a beautiful glass of bottles, jeweled with a closing of gold as a pinkish liquid was inside of it, smelling deliciously, as it was set under a set of silk fabrics, big enough for three dresses at least.

“… one of the beautiful treasures I found during my travelling, I hope that they’ll be of your liking, princess” he spoke curtly, as you gently took the bottle in your hands, opening it to let a delicious smell flood through the entire table, enough to make your head spin, meanwhile your other hand softly touched the precious silks.

“This is truly…” although you were a princes you were used to luxury but… you weren’t used to exotic gifts the ‘big bear’ had brought you “… magnificent, thank you from the bottom of my heart”.

“I hope that your husband will find them to his liking once you wear them for him” he muttered, again the innuendos making your head spin even worse than the perfume “… the women from where I bought them told me that they would surprise their husband with nothing more than the perfume on their bodies…”.

“I think we got the idea, Bjorn” Ivar’s voice was harsh and he gently pushed an hand around your waist, surprising you enough that your knee stumbled against the table “… don’t scare my Saxon nride… they are shy and fearful of God”.

Bjorn didn’t look certainly displeased with the blush in your face and you were more than happy to simply hide yourself in Ivar’s chest, feeling his heart rushing through his cold words.

Next should have come the two inked men, but Hvitserk stopped them, having another little present in his hands, contained in a leather bag, which he pushed in front of his brother.

“Another gift… brother you flatt…”.

“It’s from Floki” something glacially cold appeared in Ivar’s eyes and he moved them away from his brother quickly, but you caught the melancholy in his eyes, disappearing in a flash “… he gave it to us, in case you got married… we weren’t certainly expecting…”.

Ivar impatiently stole it from Hvitserk’s hands, and you tried to steal a glance to what it looked like, what this mysterious Floki had gifted your husband, soon finding out it was nothing more than a small cube of wood.

Ivar seemed more surprised than you, before muttering:

“That old cunt…” you blushed at the course, but gently pushed your hand onto the cube, breaking the trance in which Ivar had fallen and you were almost scared he would have a similar reaction to the one he had when you had moved to reach for the ring, but he seemed more surprised you were interested in it.

And you quickly realized as you moved your hand onto it that it wasn’t anything more than a well-elaborated enigma, one of those games that were created for the sole purpose of making their owners crazy.

You didn’t understand what it meant for your wedding, but still thanked Hvitserk for remembering about it, as your hand slowly brushed against Ivar’s and you examined the small box in search of any secrets, but the rush and emotions of the entire day were making your brain hazy.

You gave out as Ivar did, eventually pushing it back in the leather bag and gently moved it to your side of gifts, something that made you almost smile, aware that he had caught your curiosity for it.

Next came the two inked men and the one who had sent you a pity gaze kept his eyes away from you, focused on his feet, meanwhile he let the man beside him speak, as he bowed to you both, but he didn’t look any less regal than Ivar.

“Prince Ivar and princess (Y/N)” he rolled out your name on his tongue as a foreign one “… may you have a blessed wedding”.

“Thank you, king Harald, are your blessings our gift?” Ivar seemed impatient and you gently adjusted one hand onto his chest to calm him, but it had no use, meanwhile the other man, the one who looked at you moved his eyes onto your hand, as if he was analyzing it exactly as you were doing with him.

The king smirked at Ivar, although you felt in it an edge of cruelness but he gently exited a beautiful bow from his back, as his brother moved himself to let him show the beautiful weapon: the riser and the bending made of bone, but it had been worked to be as flexible as wood, a bit heavier, but it might have helped as a shield if needed in battle.

You couldn’t help but admire that gift with your curious eyes.

You had never felt the need for a weapon for as long as you had lived, but you couldn’t help but be enthralled by the extreme beauty of that creation…

… and were even more dumfounded when it was moved towards you as the two men bowed to you.

You sent a look to Ivar, who hid well his surprise but simply sent you a small glance to tell you accept it.

You almost made it fell, since you hadn’t realized that it was so heavy but immediately stabilized the weight as you adjusted your feet on the chair, being smitten and you saw all the details in the bow.

And surprisingly on the riser there was a beautiful sculpture of a woman.

“I… this is a beautiful gift… king Harald” he smiled smug at your compliment, daring to put his hand onto yours.

“You are now the protector of the house, beautiful princess (Y/N)…” you couldn’t help but feel like that was implying much more than expected in your role as a royal pawn “… you’ll have certainly to take care of the house, but also to defend it, hence you need to learn how to fight”.

The sole thought of fighting was something that sent a chilled shiver through your spine.

You didn’t like the thought of it, but proceeded to thank king Harald again, promising him that you would have learned how to fight, although you couldn’t help but find it difficult to find somebody who would have taught such an art.

And beside you Ivar was sending dark looks at Harald, and it was unknown to you whether he meant them to scary the man off or because he had been personally offended by the gift.

You loved it, but what it entailed scared you and you were even more careful to handle it.

“Now you may as well as join the other guests” mumbled Ivar as the two tall men stood straight and with no intention to move, as again the older one provoked Ivar.

“Oh, but we want a kiss!” he mumbled softly, clapping his hand together “… you hadn’t had one and you are supposed to be a married couple”.

“… again my bride is shy…” tried to excuse yourselves Ivar, but it didn’t seem to work and you couldn’t help but blush at the insistence of king Harald, joining Ivar in his excuses.

“I don’t think that it would be proper…”.

But the entire crowd was looking at you expectantly, and Ivar decided to try, gently pushing his lips onto your cheeks in a bare caress that flustered you even more, as you adjusted yourself in the chair, one hand seriously reaching for your horn.

“… oh c’mon, Ivar! That isn’t a kiss!” protested Harald and you felt that also the crowd was displeased with your small exchange “… we want to see your pretty lips on hers, c’mon! Are you scarred her holiness will burn your lips?”.

The taunting was slowly getting to Ivar and you felt the rage reappearing in his gaze, as you moved yourself in your chair and did what you thought would cease all of this, completely shredding any embarrass you previously had.

You had heard of kissing from your servants: once hiding in the library, you had caught a group of them talking secretly about their lovers, and how they kissed them, making you aware that there wasn’t only a use of lips but also of tongue.

You didn’t dare with Ivar, pressing almost violently your lips against his and stealing, effectively, his breath, as he stilled at your sudden movement, and for a moment you were almost scared he had taken it as a personal offense.

But then he softened against you, circling your waist with one of his hands, meanwhile his lips adjusted against yours, separating from them as your noses brushed clumsily together.

A war cry was sent to the sky, as the crowd erupted in laughter and other ceremonial cheers and you were more than happy to shrink yourself away from Ivar, embarrassment painting your cheeks of red, meanwhile Ivar’s voice was barely roughed by your contact as he spoke about the blessing he had been given, having you as his bride.

The two inked men didn’t seem satisfied in the slightest of Ivar’s gesture, but they didn’t do much more than bow, a light annoyed gaze onto the older one, meanwhile the other smirked at you, and curiosity shone in your eyes.

He was curious about you.

Which might come indeed handy.

“… and since this day has proved itself to be so beautiful but yet so tiring, I think that me and my wife will retire to our chambers”.

The phrase stole all the breath in your lungs and you sent an immediate panicked look at your sister, Kathleen having a similar one, as Abigail tried to reassure you with a small smile, as Ivar held out his hand for you to grab, getting himself up with his crutches and you felt like throwing up all you had eaten.

You still didn’t let his offer linger too much, well aware that if the kiss had sated the hungry wolves, after the failure of the ring, you couldn’t dare a mistake and elegantly you moved behind Ivar, as he rumbled with his guards about what to do and you waited impatiently, sending guarded looks at your sisters.

Kathleen looked like she was solely stopped by Abigail’s tight grip from barging and pushing you in her arms and for a moment you wanted her to do it desperately.

Then Heahmund came at your back an evident reminder that you had a duty to finish.

Although that duty froze all your limbs and made your boiling blood disappear from your veins, replaced by utter fear.

You moved forward mechanically, almost as if you were being pushed forward by a rope wrapped around your hands and kept between Ivar’s.

Which was partially true.

Ivar suddenly turned around and you were petrified on your stand, his gaze piercing through you almost painfully and you expected him to tell you to run away, but then his features became lighter, till he had a simple annoyed look on his face.

“Why are you walking behind me, wife?” he asked, making you blush “… are you afraid that standing by my side might shame you”.

“No absolutely!” you couldn’t help but be instead the one annoyed by Ivar’s insinuation “… a wife always walks behind her husband in my culture”.

“I do think that is humiliating”.

You smiled lightly agreeing and he offered his arm to you, which, again, you didn’t hesitate to take, joining him, as he had a more satisfied expression, but you were well aware that your trembling didn’t stop as you were linked.

You quickly matched Ivar’s movements, which were quite fast for a cripple, but you were thankful because keeping a pace helped your mind off the entire situation.

A coldness had taken home in your bones and you couldn’t help but shiver lightly as you moved to your demise.

As you came to a stop, Ivar’s huge tent and you felt your stomach become taunt, as your breath was frozen by your own coldness.

Heahmund made a move to come nearer to you, but Ivar’s guards stopped him, as the crippled prince turned to him with a small smirk.

“It is in our tradition that the first night of weddings is witnessed!” spoke the bishop, making you blush, but the presence of a familiar face would have made you feel safe: he would have stopped Ivar if he had tried to take you too violently.

But Ivar simply shook his head, gently pushing you a bit closer to him by his hand.

“But you are not in England anymore” it wasn’t a simple remark, but it was an evident comment about how much the Vikings had conquered “… I think that it would make us feel more at ease to be left alone”.

You sent a desperate look at Heahmund who tried another time to get past the guards, but it was useless, so you just bowed your head and turned to follow your husband, till a scream brought you back.

Kathleen had managed to escape Abigail’s hold and had meant to come for you, but Heahmund had caught her again, and she was screaming all the worst she could, threatening Ivar against even scratching one hair on your head.

Ivar simply smirked, coming closer to Kathleen and you tried to stop him, but it was of no use, and you couldn’t help but fear for your sister’s life as the prince came close to him and your stubborn and beloved sister stood at him, challenging him openly.

“I won’t hurt her” Ivar’s tone was solemn, and it seemed to make Kathleen question herself, as he continued in perfect Saxon “… she is my heart and my queen, I wouldn’t do anything to displease her”.

And now that silence was again obtained, he marched inside the tent with you by his side and once inside you lost completely any intention of fighting back and realized that you could never go back.

“… would you like something to drink?” offered Ivar as he disappeared in the enormous tent, which surprised you as you took in a clean inside with an elegant assemble, weapons everywhere but what soon caught your attention was the enormous bed, shielded from anything else by a gracious wall in perforated iron.

As you saw it, you immediately remembered lady Claudia’s words.

‘Lay down the bed, immediately after shielding your clothes, but keep on your nightgown and wait there till he comes to you, you either will do this or he’ll do it for you, and believe me if you show to men that you are obedient they’ll treat you better…’ she had explained, and you raised away from your body a few layer of clothes, till you were left with your nightgown, following her suggestion ‘… keep your legs closed, men like whores and pious women at the same time’.

You gently laid onto the bed, adjusting yourself in a comfortable position as you closed your eyes, waiting for him as other words about your first night flew into your mind with lady Claudia’s soft voice.

‘… if he is a good and experienced man, he’ll realize that he needs to prepare you for it: he’ll kiss you and take his time, till your nest will be wet enough for him to slide easier inside you’ that’s when you had started to blush desperately, as a tingling sensation settled in your stomach.

You wouldn’t have pushed away the thought of Ivar kissing you: the memory of your last kiss came back and you were able to enjoy the softness of his plush lips and his shy movements.

‘… if he isn’t a good and experienced man, he’ll take you dry, maybe using his spit to slip inside you, in this case, it won’t be pleasurable’ any romantic scenario you had set up in your head vanished completely at that notion ‘… in that case, think of being elsewhere, with your sisters in the castle or in a beautiful magical land. It’ll make time pass faster and the pain will only take your body not your own mind’.

And you couldn’t help but keep a tighter grip onto your head as you prayed to your God one last time for your husband not to be that man, not to touch you with violence, forcing himself in your body.

Tainting it, not with his heathen seed, but with his heathen violence.

You waited and you counted, and you prayed, but you couldn’t help but feel like nothing was happening and sneakily opened one eye to find Ivar looking at you sat on the small chair beside the perforated iron wall.

“Is my bed comfortable enough for you, princess?” his mocking tone made you tremble due to embarrassment and you shot him a warning look, although you were well aware of lady Claudia’s suggestion to keep yourself ‘tamed’ for your husband.

“… wonderfully comfortable, my prince” your voice was mostly docile, but Ivar didn’t seem to ignore the sarcastic undertone smirking lightly “… why don’t you join me?”.

“(Y/N) we are not going to have sex”.

You didn’t know what sounded stranger, as you immediately pushed yourself up again in a seated position at his words: your name with the way his light accent distorted or the news that you wouldn’t be having…

“We are not… ahem…?”.

“No we are not” Ivar’s voice had gone quickly from cheery to grim and immediately you realized that he was quite prone to mood changes “… I think that you have heard the many rumors about my inability to… raise up to the occasion”.

Your eyes set again on your hands and you didn’t know whether it was to hide your knowledge of his ‘flaw’ or because you were ashamed of the entire talk.

And weren’t able to feel relief at that confession, as if the realization that you wouldn’t be tainted by a heathen hadn’t still fallen onto you.

And almost as if you were almost disappointed nothing would happen.

You should have definitely talked with Father Pether for your sinful thoughts.

“… that is why I didn’t allow them inside” he explained, meanwhile he also avoided looking at you in the eyes “… and this is why we need to settle down a few things about this marriage”.

Your attention immediately perked up.

“I am well aware this isn’t something wanted by both parties” and he sent you a meaningful look that petrified you on that post and you weren’t able to simply do nothing more than silently swallow your breath “… but I hope that if we can’t have love for each other, we can at least have respect between us”.

You couldn’t help but think that he spoke like your father did when he was making administering decisions, but with a tone that you couldn’t help but detect as lightly awkward and shy.

“…what I ask of you as my wife is simple support and honesty: don’t go behind my back and I won’t bother you” it almost felt like a threat and you couldn’t help but stand a little bit taller on your own as if you had taken it like a personal challenge “… that is all I ask of you, (Y/N)”.

He wanted you two to be cordial strangers as many royal couples were in reality, at least in yours.

There was such a sadness in his offer that you couldn’t help but feel your heart tighten as your stomach became relaxed and it finally proceeded the realization that you were safe… for now.

“Then I do think that we have a deal, Ivar”.

He seemed surprised by the way you spoke back his name, but hid it, quickly as he moved from the chair towards the bed, although he settled far away from you, almost as if he was the one scared by you.

You wanted to ask him more about why he had chosen you, if he had known that you would have never loved him.

The contract he had made with your father wasn’t certainly profitable for him as it was for your father, and you weren’t certainly the typical beauty that had made thousands of boats turn.

“… now we have another problem” he spoke slowly as he exited a blade from his belt and you couldn’t help but still in your movements a small rush of fear appearing in your eyes, meanwhile Ivar tutted lowly his tongue at your scared face “… I told you that I wouldn’t have hurt you without a motive, little princess, haven’t I?”.

“I am just not used to men holding blades this close to me” this time you were definitely sarcastic, although anything in you screamed for you not to tease the beast, who crooked his eyebrow at you as he smirked, moving the blade away for which you were thankful.

“I am not going to hurt you, but they will be disappointed if they don’t find blood, because it’ll mean we haven’t consumed the marriage”.

You were grateful he hadn’t mentioned the other option: that you might have been sent to him impure and already spoiled.

But what he was saying was true: you had to prove the consummation or both your rules and his would have made the marriage illegal, hence it would have been annulled.

And if he didn’t intend to do his job you had to succeed in other ways.

Painful ways, as Ivar sliced his palm in a quick motion, not even seeming to perceive the pain as you rushed to him, worried, but he pushed you away, instead motioning for you to throw away the blankets and fur in order for him to release the blood onto the mattress.

And a few drops fell, although you were sure that they wouldn’t have been enough, but you immediately saw the way Ivar’s eyes hazed as blood flooded freely from his veins and without too much knowledge you took a small part of your wedding dress and lightly pushed it against the cut, closing it with a quick knot, the pressure stopping the blood from flowing.

You also remembered yourself to try to wet it and clean the wound, in order for it not to get infected.

You always did this to Kathleen whenever your father would hit her.

It was in your nature, according to her, to care for others.

Ivar looked at you surprised and then at the small portion of blood, a sign that it wasn’t enough, and you realized that if you wanted this relationship to work, you had to sacrifice a bit.

You took his blade from the hand and cleaned it carelessly onto your nightgown, where you ripped a long strip of fabric for later, before slashing also your palms.

Unlike Ivar you moaned in pain and the cut was less precise, but it managed to fill the small stain on the mattress, immediately trying to cover the wound with the fabric.

With the way you had cut yourself, you were pretty sure there would be a scar on it.

But what burned in you was Ivar’s expression.

You didn’t know whether he was looking at you with curiosity or with respect, but he was completely smitten with you.

And you quickly got yourself up, unused to such intensity, the red on your cheek matching the red onto your nightgown, which caught your eyes.

“May I change into something other than this nightgown?” you asked softly, and Ivar quickly nodded.

“I could ask for one of the guards to grab you another nightgown…” but this would mean waiting with the stain of blood that lightly brushed against your legs and the sight of it alone made you a bit dizzy “… or I could lend you a tunic of mine”.

And although you were aware that it was rather inappropriate, you nodded at his second idea.

You tried to justify as an attempt to mimic their freedom.

Ivar gently pushed himself onto the ground and there, without the help of the crutch he had left unattended on the other side of the bed, and he crawled to a small wardrobe, slithering around like a snake, although you didn’t fear him, in the slightest.

He gently pushed the tunic in your hand, as you crouched lightly to take it.

“… thank you” you mumbled, meanwhile he ignored your words, simply gesturing you to the small separated area where he told you would have water and a bit of privacy for which you were extremely grateful

You changed taking quite your time, finally able to have a moment alone.

And there you couldn’t help but break down, as you lightly crouched down, feeling your body release all his tension as you hugged your legs to your chest, compressing all the air in your lungs to let it out in a deep breath as you counted the time passing.

Counting always helped you to stay focused and this was enough to allow you to calm down a bit, as you reminded yourself that you were now safe, and Ivar wouldn’t have touched you.

You were away from home, but tomorrow you would have seen your sisters…

… one last time.

But it was enough to hold you tight and with your head high and you slipped the tunic over your head, pushing the dirty one away as you washed at last your hand.

You left some water for Ivar, bringing it with you as you joined him in the main room, but he was already asleep, in the bed and you didn’t have the heart to wake him up, alongside the fact that the thought of doing it… made you nervous.

So, you carefully just adjusted the water basin on the table and sat yourself down on the chair beside it, using partly your dress as a blanket.

You gently adjusted it onto your body, as tiredness took over you, in a peaceful slumber.

One day had passed, now all eternity remained.

---

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wonwoosthetic · 5 years ago

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Goddess Of The Underworld | Part Two || Geralt of Rivia

My masterlist is linked in my bio :)

PART ONE is advised to be read before this :)

Jesus guys, I got so much positive feedback from the last part, THANK YOU!! It genuinely made me soooo happy, so I hope that you will enjoy this part just as much! :)

Request: Hiiiiii can I please request a Geralt fic, where the reader is like Yennefer but more powerful

!!A/N!!: I’m thinking about re-naming this series, I’m not too happy about it... just don’t feel like it fits the way that I want to take this story, so if you have any suggestions, please let me know! :) I’m sure, you guys are a LOT more creative than me, when it comes to this!!

Warnings: cursing, slight mention of blood

Word Count: 2.198 words

She was born as Hella, the Gentle, but after that fire, her hair turned black and suddenly she was known as Hel. No one knows why.

Goddess Of The Underworld | Part Two: What’s Lost Is Found

Even though the last day he had spent in the village was fairly warm, the way through the forest was a lot colder than he expected. On his way he came across a few villagers sitting around fires they had built themselves or snuggled up under big furs – it interested him how the temperature could change that quickly, but he was thankful that he couldn’t feel the cold. Day one of his journey was slowly coming to an end, Geralt noticed the colour of the sky changing into a warmer tone. The pathway became harder to see, so the Witcher reached behind him in search for his Cat* potion. He dived his hand deep into the bag, rattling it around hoping to feel the glass bottle but without success. “Fuck”, he breathed out in annoyance, I should have remembered to get another few bottles, just in case, he thought. With the sun slowly setting, he could still find his way around as much as any other human being could, in a forest they had never been to. Roach was getting tired as well, noticeable by the way he held his head and his slow steps, either that or he could feel something coming. After travelling a little further, always making sure to follow the dirty earth-path, Geralt stopped his horse, “Hold on, Roach”, he jumped of its back and went around its frame to come face-to-face, gently running his hand up and down the space between the eyes, “we should take a break, you’re tired, it’s okay. Tomorrow’s another day.” He grabbed the rope he always kept in one of the backs attached to the saddle, made a knot around one of the reins and tied the other end around a big, strong-looking tree, next to a free space where Geralt decided to rest for the night. After giving the horse an apple as a good night snack, the Witcher walked around the spot, that had weirdly no grass growing, to look for something like a wooden log to rest his head on and use as a sort of pillow. Within a few minutes he had found one a couple feet away from Roach. He was walking back when a sound of a bush rustling rushed through his ears – it sounded like something or someone was watching him, he could feel it. The Witcher dropped the piece of wood, reached to his back to grab a hold of his sword... that was supposed to be there... Quickly he patted his back with both of his hands to feel if it maybe had moved, but no, there was no longer a sword attached to him. He turned around as a gush of wind went past him, “Show yourself!”, he shouted in an angry voice. How could he not have felt something taking it from his back?

It had already gotten so dark, he wasn’t even able to see his companion anymore, only suddenly hear him whinnying. The white-haired Witcher was quick on his feet, trusting his instincts to get him back to the place he had left all of his belongings before, but without luck.

Geralt was stood in the middle of nowhere, with no sword, no potions, nothing but him and his armor, and his instincts that he felt like, he couldn’t trust anymore.

Accompanied by another subtle wind, a high singing voice echoed through the woods. He turned his head in all directions, looking left and right as a sense of paranoia spread in his stomach – this was more than just unusual for his kind. As soon as the voice stopped, the wind stopped as well and Geralt was left alone with the thoughts running through his head. He was only able to hear the sound of a few leaves scrunching beneath him while turning around in circles, trying to make things out in the dark.

“Who are you?!”, his voice got a lot deeper. A whimpering sound emerged from behind a bush, “Please, no! I-I just-“ “Just wanted what?! Steal all of my stuff?”, the Witcher interrupted the much smaller creature. “No!”, it stood up straight and with the help of the moonlight, Geralt was able to make out the silhouette of a small-looking boy – he couldn’t have been older than twelve years old.

The older man looked at the kid in confusion, “What are you doing out here? Alone.” “My family is over there”, he pointed somewhere in the dark, “but I wanted to warn you”, there was a slight shake in his voice. “Warn me?”, Geralt wanted to know more. “Yes”, the boy got closer to the Witcher, “You shouldn’t be here... it’s not safe for... your kind.”

“So, you know who I am”, his deep voice sent chills of slight fear over the young boy’s body. “Of course. Everyone does. You’re Geralt of Rivia, THE Witcher. Word travels fast... even for elves.”

The last word made Geralt’s head shot up, “Elves? You’re an elve?” And as quick as the young elve showed up, he was gone again. He got scared and sprinted back to where he came from. “No, wait!”, in annoyance, the Witcher puffed out a big amount of air through his teeth.

Great, his stuff got stolen and all he knew was, that he definitely was not welcome here but why... he didn’t know. Deciding, there was not much else to do, as he was still not able to see much, he got down on the floor right next to Roach and tried falling asleep.

The sound of a singing voice woke him up a few times during the dark night.

Sleeping was hard, Geralt wasn’t able to get a good rest – that explained his even worse mood the next morning. After feeding his horse with a few apples, he got on his back and found a small river just a few minutes into his journey, where they stopped and Geralt filed his water bottle while Roach enjoyed the water right from the creek.

Last night’s encounter with the elf kept the Witcher uneasy – and the fact that he had no potions and no weapons anymore.

After a while on the horse’s back, he decided to walk for a bit after finding interesting “foot”prints on the mudy ground. Geralt had never seen any like that, normal feet but with dark prints, possibly ash, and something that looked like a trail that dragged right behind the footprints. I must be getting closer, he thought. He continued the rest of the journey through the woods on his feet.

As soon as the trees stopped growing, the footprints vanished as well. Geralt’s eyes trailed the path further into the distance, only to come to sight with dead trees and bushes. Not one green growing thing in sight... The ground turned from a muddy brown colour to deep black, raven black. He crouched down to the floor, dipped his fingers into the ground and smelled them right afterwards.

Ash. He was right. He was close.

Whatever was beyond this border of death was not going to be safe for Roach. Therefore, Geralt looked for a big tree and tied the horse’s reins witch the rope around it, said goodbye, and gave him one last apple before continuing the walk on his own.

After a few minutes of walking, the Witcher noticed that he was no longer able to see his own feet, from his knees downwards everything was covered in thick dust. The sky had also turned from its normally blue into a white colour, probably covered in clouds. The dead trees had become less and less, slowly there was absolutely nothing anymore. Suddenly, a cold shiver ran down Geralt’s back. He quickly whipped his head around to see what had caused it, but there was nothing. Absolutely nothing. Everything was gone. The path he had been following, the few dead trees – everything.

He turned back around, only to see the exact same emptiness. The only thing he was looking at at that moment, was the colour white.

And there it was again. The singing voice from the night before. It startled Geralt, “What do you want from me?!” But he got no answer. His first instinct was to just run, and so he did. He tried following the voice, but it came from everywhere around him. He ran and ran, his pace quickened but he was going nowhere. There was no point. The singing became louder, slowly and slowly. Geralt ran even faster. The voice followed him. With every step he took, the singing became louder and most importantly higher. The Witcher’s ears started hurting as the voice was almost just an incredibly loud and painful whistle. He had to stop and hold his ears. His knees gave in and he fell to the floor. The voice didn’t stop. Geralt started feeling a warm fluid coming out of his ears as it trickled down his neck. The ringing became louder and his vision darkened.

The first thing he felt were warm hands and something wet on his left ear. The person was very gentle but yet it startled the Witcher. He shot up from his lying position and stood straight with a furious look on his face, “What the fuck are you doing?” “I-I’m sorry, I-I-I swear- I didn’t m- I just wanted to help you.” In front of him, on her knees, next to the bed he had just been lying in, was a young woman, maybe even a girl. She had raven black hair and piercing eyes. Her clothes were just as dark as her hair... this could be... “Who are you?”, he didn’t want to wait. She reached forward to a blanket lying on the bed and handed it to the Witcher because what he didn’t notice was, that he in fact, was butt-ass naked. She contemplated for a short while whether or not to tell him who she really was, “Hella.”

Geralt’s face softened up a slight bit as he looked her up and down, “You? You are Hella?”

Uncomfortably, she crossed her arms in front of her stomach, “So... you’ve... heard of me...” Her eyes drifted everywhere but to the Witcher, who scoffed at her answer, “Yeah, you burnt down an entire village”, he stated in disbelieve. “I didn’t!”, she shouted, startling the man in front of her slightly, “It wasn’t me!”, her breathing quickened and tears threatened to spill out of her eyes, “I swear, I didn’t do it.”

She looked so fragile and lost as Geralt looked closely at her. Her arms, her neck, and even her feet were covered in scars – they looked like burns, terrible burns. Looks can be deceiving, but this girl... no, there was no way.

“How did you find me?”, he wondered, as he realised that there was nothing around him when he passed out. “I was looking for some berries and all of sudden you were laying there”, she calmed down, she didn’t want to cry in front of a Witcher, “You looked dead”, she made the bed and then walked over to the small kitchen, where Geralt was able to lean on the counters, “I couldn’t just leave you out there.”

There it was. Way too kind. Just as he was about to answer, a neighing came from outside. No way. He knew that sound only too well. “Oh yeah, your horse is not-”, Hella wasn’t even able to finish her sentence as the Witcher was quick on his feet and ran through the entrance door outside, holding the blanket around his waist. “Roach”, he breathed as a burden fell off his shoulders. The horse turned his head to where the sound of its owner’s voice came from and bumped his nose with Geralt’s face making him smirk. “I know. Good boy.” His hands went up stroke its neck.

“Why did you leave him alone?” He didn’t notice the young woman following him outside with an apple in her hand to feed Roach. “The path looked too dangerous, I wanted to go alone first”, he explained before turning his full body to her, “how did you find him?” “I didn’t”, she started, “he found me. After finding you, I brought you here and he was just suddenly... also... here. I saw the crest”, she pointed to it, “Witcher.”

“Thank you”, he said and truly meant it.

With a smile, she was about to turn around and go back in, when a thought stopped her, “Wait, you... you said the path looked too dangerous... what did you mean by that?” “Are you serious? There was nothing in sight, everything was dead-“, he stopped as he had just gotten time to look around where he was. Still in the woods. Everything was green, not a dead bush or tree in sight. “Wait a second, how-“, Geralt wasn’t able to process everything fast enough, it didn’t make any sense... There was no possible way of... “Oh no”, the small voice from the young woman next to him brought him back. “What?”, he scrunched his eyebrows as he noticed her shaking form.

“They got you too”, she stated and looked at him in fear.

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Sooo, this was part two, I hope you enjoyed it :), I’m sorry that it took me so long, but I took part at a musical and had the lead, so I had quite a lot of work to do... hihi

TAGLIST is also still open!

Thank you for all of the love you’re showing towards this series! <3

Hope you have a great day/night! :) <3

#Henry Cavill x reader #the witcher x reader #geralt x reader #geralt of rivia x reader #Henry Cavill imagine #the witcher imagine #geralt imagine #geralt of rivia imagine

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