#more of a future with her bff than her ex lmao

[nerdyfangirlingbooks]

Is there a word for the opposite of internalised homophobia? When someone's normalised queerness so much in their head that they don't realise they're queer themself?

Like bi people not realising they're bi because when faced with homophobia their reaction is something along the lines of "who cares what gender someone else dates, why does that even matter to people? How is that a defining part of a relationship anyway? What are you supposed to do, just not like someone because of their gender?" only to eventually realise there's a reason they can't understand how gender could ever be a defining character trait for anyone in a relationship and it's because for them it isn't. But that is apparently not, in fact, the case for a lot of people

[petersasteria]

Sperm Donor - BFF!CEO!Tom Holland

Pairing: BFF!Tom x Reader (platonic), Pre-School Teacher!Haz x Reader

Requested? Nah.

This is inspired by a movie that I watched a month or so ago x

They're older in this one lmao

* * * *

Life is weird. It starts slow during your childhood and when you turn twenty, you get old really fast. Panic sets in and we all suddenly become aware that we haven't done anything significant or life-changing. That's the reason why people make weird and quick decisions like: dyeing their hair a crazy color or finally quitting the job they had since they were younger. Tom wasn't panicking, though. He felt like he's done everything and he's just relaxing while managing a company he inherited. You, on the other hand, were panicking. You're already twenty-seven and you haven't done the most basic shit in life.

You already traveled around, partied, made out with strangers, having one night stands and never seeing them again, dyed your hair, etc. But after your check up from the doctor, you realized that it was time for the next step; the more serious and mature part of life. Your best friend, Tom, was still stuck in the immature part of life and you didn't want that.

Both of you were really different. At this day and age, he still wanted to do all the things both of you did when you were eighteen. Meanwhile, you've been thinking about settling down. The only problem was, you weren't dating anyone. It was totally your choice to be single, but now you wanted that to change.

You invited Tom for lunch after your check up and he happily agreed. He hasn't seen you for a long time due to him being busy. He really missed you. You went straight to yours and Tom's favorite restaurant after the check up and ordered for the both of you while waiting for him. He was a little late, because he arrived when the food arrived.

"I'm so sorry I'm late, love." He leaned in a pressed a light kiss on your cheek before sitting across from you. He loosened his tie and smiled when he saw his favorite food. He glanced at you, "Thanks for ordering."

"No problem, Tom." You playfully rolled your eyes. You took a bite of your food and cleared your throat, "So, how've you been?"

Tom looked at you as he chewed his food and shrugged, "Busy as always, but I'll always make time for you, darling."

"What are your plans?" You asked.

"Plans? For what?" Tom furrowed his eyebrows. You took a sip of your drink and said, "You know, life plans. Are you planning on settling down soon or something? Are you going on dates?"

Tom scrunched his face and quickly shook his head, "Darling, you of all people should know that I don't go on dates. I prefer sleeping around with no strings attached."

"But surely you'd want to settle down, right? Like, get married and have kids?" You trailed off. Tom just looked at you and put down his utensils, "Alright, what's going on? What's with the questions?"

You pursed your lips and stayed quiet.

"Oh, you won't say anything? Then I won't stop staring at you." Tom challenged and Tom doesn't back down at any challenge. You just shrugged and ate your food. Tom gave you a sly smile and continued to eat his food too, his gaze not leaving you.

After a few minutes, you felt creeped out and groaned, "Fine! You win!"

Tom grinned in victory, "So tell me what's wrong."

"I want to settle down." You said sternly as you looked at Tom with a serious look on your face. Tom's jaw dropped in shock.

"Are you serious??" Tom asked.

You nodded.

He chuckled, "Y/N, darling, you're a teacher for kids and it surprisingly pays well, but aren't you sick of seeing kids everyday? Besides, if you settle down, I have no one to go to parties with!"

"But we're getting old, Tom!" You whined. "And kids are actually cute!"

"You despised kids when we were twenty." Tom pointed at you.

"That was seven years ago! People change, Tom." You sighed. "Why are you so against it, anyway?"

"Because you're my ride or die! You're basically my soulmate at this point." Tom said and you nodded.

"I don't see why that has to change."

"It will change, because you won't have time for me. Then when we finally hang out, you'll talk about your baby and shit." Tom frowned. "How can we attend that party in Prague next week, if you're settling down?"

"I mean, w-we can still go." You told him.

"How will you even settle down?? You're not dating anyone." Tom challenged again.

"Sperm donor." You told him boldly and he gasped. He was surprised, because he didn't exactly imagine you having babies that way. Heck, he didn't even imagine you having babies at all. He still thought that both of you wouldn't be settling down.

"Are you for real?" Tom whispered after a moment of silence.

"Yup." You breathed.

"Oh dear god, Y/N." Tom rubbed his face. "Are you out of your mind? Just get a boyfriend."

"No fucking way. I want kids now."

"Do you even have anyone in mind??"

"I originally thought it to be you-"

"No way! I hate kids." Tom glared.

"I know, that's why I changed my mind. I've decided that my sperm donor would be Harrison." You proudly claimed with a smile. Tom stared at you and laughed, "As in your colleague? Isn't that against rules or something?"

"There are no rules, Thomas." You rolled your eyes. "I'm doing this whether you like it or not."

Tom put his hands up in surrender, "I won't stop you. It's your body; your incredibly hot body. Are you sure you want to ruin that by having kids?"

"Tom." You glared.

"Alright, I'll stop. 'M sorry, darling." Tom snickered and continued to eat his food.

-

"Can you believe that she actually wants kids? It's so weird, Sam! You should've seen her." Tom said as he took a sip of his beer.

He was visiting Sam to confide in, because Sam was the first one to have a child. Sam looked at him and chuckled, "Kids aren't that bad."

"They're whiny and needy." Tom pouted.

"And so were you when you were a baby. All babies are like that." Sam said as he looked at his one year old son who was playing with building blocks on the living room floor.

"I don't like them. That's final." Tom huffed.

Sam raised an eyebrow at him, "Are you saying you don't like your nephew?"

"Okay, he's different. He's family and-"

"Yeah and your future kids will be family too!" Sam laughed.

"I just don't want kids, okay?! Why does everyone pressure someone to have kids anyway? I'll just be your son's undeniably rich and handsome uncle who's super cool and spoils him." Tom said.

Sam laughed so hard at his claim. Tom frowned as he looked at Sam. He meant every word he said. Sam wiped away the tears in his eyes and calmed down, "I laughed, because you thought you were handsome. Everyone knows I'm arguably the best looking Holland."

Tom snickered, "Calm down, Sammy boy. You're not mum."

"Touche."

-

"Tom! I'm so glad you could make it!" You smiled when you saw him through the crowd. Tom smiled and kissed your cheek, "You know for someone who's trying to get pregnant, you're not boring at all."

You playfully slapped his arm and pointed at the paper bag he was holding, "What's that?"

"A gift for you." Tom handed it to you. "It's weird how you're having a pregnancy party thing when you're not pregnant; not yet, at least."

You took the paper bag and put it on the gift table, "Well, it's not wrong to celebrate."

"That's true and we both no I love alcohol." Tom smiled and grabbed a bottle of beer.

"I'm surprised you're not an alcoholic."

"Same here, darling."

A few moments later, Tom was already drunk and he saw Harrison. He decided it would be best to formally meet the father of your soon to be child.

"Hey mate." Tom greeted with a big grin. Harrison looked at him and nodded.

"You don't talk much, do you?" Tom asked with a raised eyebrow.

Harrison chuckled, "I do. It's just that I can't believe this is happening."

"How'd she get you to do it?" Tom asked. "I'm curious, because if I'm being honest with you, even if she flashes her boobs at me, I'd still say no."

"Well, she and I really like kids. Then she brought up the idea and I thought it was cool. She then asked me if I wanted to do it. In my head, I said no, but the more I thought about it, the more I started to agree."

"And you agreed? Just like that?" Tom asked in surprise.

Harrison nodded, "Yeah. We even talked about the visitation arrangement and stuff and that she'd live with me when she's on maternity leave so I could help her around and stuff."

"Holy shit. You guys are prepared." Tom chuckled. "I'm actually impressed. Why don't you start dating and be an official family?" Tom joked.

"I would be lying if I told you that I haven't thought about it before." Harrison confessed. "But I thought she was dating you and I backed off for a while until I dated someone."

"Dated? As in like you're not with this person anymore?" Tom asked. Harrison just nodded. "Then you're more than welcome to date, Y/N! As her bestest friend in the whole wide world, you have my permission." Tom slurred.

"My ex and I kinda just broke up a week ago and it's still fresh and I don't want Y/N to think that she'd be a rebound." Harrison looked down.

"Oh." Tom said. "Well, thanks for not dating her, I guess. At least she wouldn't feel that she was a rebound.

"Yeah." Harrison smiled a small smile.

"Well, I'll go to the restroom, yeah? I'll talk to you later. As her best friend, I feel like I should get to know you more." Tom hiccuped as he stumbled away to go to the restroom in your apartment.

Tom finally made it to the bathroom and did his business. He flushed the toilet and washed his hands with soap and water thrice. No one knew why, but he's been doing that ever since he was old enough to go to the bathroom on his own. It kind of annoyed you, because whenever he was at your place, the hand soap you just bought is already half empty (or half full, depending on how you look at it). You had to get him his own hand soap whenever he was in your place. You even put a label on it.

After he was done washing his hands thrice with soap and water, he saw a little container with Harrison's name on it. He chuckled when he realized it was Harrison's... you know.

"So, these are his best swimmers." Tom drunkenly chuckled to himself. He clumsily took the container and opened it. "Did he fill it up or something?" Tom curiously asked as he took a peek. Due to being really drunk, he was unable to stand still and because of that, the container fell in the sink and Harrison's 'best swimmers' went down the drain.

Tom's eyes widened in horror and he panicked, "Holy shit! Fuck. Fuck. Fuck. Oh my fucking god! Y/N's going to fucking kill me."

He paced back and forth in the bathroom until he came up with a plan. A stupid plan at that. He could've made up some shitty excuse that the container fell on its own, but he didn't. Instead, he cleaned the container and sighed to himself. He sat on the toilet and took out his phone to look at something to jerk off to. When he found something, he did his business.

-

Once Tom was done with everything (including his thing of washing his hands thrice), he finally exited the bathroom.

"Tom, there you are! I've been looking all over for you!" You smiled at him and dragged him to the living room. Everyone was gathered around and Tom started to feel like he was in a cult and you were the leader.

"Okay so, I'd like to say a few words." You started. "Thank you all so much for coming to this party! I appreciate all the gifts already. It's like a baby shower, but at the same time it isn't, y'know?"

Everyone chuckled except Tom. He was already kind of sober and he couldn't comprehend what just happened in the bathroom. You were saying something, but he couldn't understand it, because he wasn't focused. He finally snapped out of it when he heard Harrison's name.

"Thank you so much, Harrison. If it weren't for you, my dream wouldn't come true." You smiled as Harrison chuckled.

'Oh god. I'm so sorry, Harrison.' Tom thought.

"Lastly, I'd like to thank Tom." You looked at him with a bright smile. He couldn't help but return it. "Thank you for being supportive about this. You're the best. I love you." You added.

Tom chuckled nervously, "I love you too, darling. I want you to be happy and if having a baby makes you happy, then who am I to go against it?"

You grinned and pulled him in for a hug. Everyone around you clapped. Tom hugged back, but his thoughts were running wild.

'Oh my god. I'm so sorry, Y/N. I ruined it.' Tom thought.

The next day, he didn't go to work. He went back to Sam's place which was weird, because it was early in the morning. Sam was awake anyway, because he was cooking breakfast for his fiance and son.

As soon as Sam opened the door, Tom went straight in. "Um, sure. Come in and make yourself at home." Sam said sarcastically as he closed the door. He followed Tom to the kitchen and asked why he was there,

"I fucked up." Tom said.

"You always do, but what did you fuck up this time?" Sam asked as he fried the bacon.

"Y/N's pregnancy." Tom bit his lip.

"What do you mean by that?" Sam questioned as he glanced at his older brother for a second before turning back to the bacon.

"I, uh, fuck. Um, I don't know how to say it."

"Just spit it out, man!"

"I'm going to be the father of her baby." Tom spat.

Sam quickly turned off the stove and fully gave his attention to Tom, "What? How? Why? I thought that guy Harvey-"

"Harrison." Tom corrected.

"I thought that guy, Harrison, was the dad?" Sam asked in confusion and slight panic.

Tom groaned and rubbed his face and crossed his arms, "I may or may not have accidentally opened it and it fell in the sink and his sperm is most likely swimming through the pipes as we speak."

Sam's jaw dropped, "Holy fucking shit. Did you tell her?"

"Um, no? Was I supposed to?"

"YOU FUCKING IDIOT. Of fucking course you were supposed to tell her!" Sam gasped. "Sometimes I even wonder why you got the company."

Tom glared at him and Sam shrugged, "You need to tell Y/N or she'll murder you."

"She'll get mad." Tom whined.

"She'll get even more mad if she finds out after the baby comes out and it looks like you!!" Sam pointed out. "Harrison's fucking blonde, mate."

"How'd you know?" Tom asked.

"Y/N showed me his picture after you told me she was getting a sperm donor." Sam explained but shook his head. "Wait, we're getting off-track. She'll be fucking shocked and confused if the baby won't look like Harrison."

"Oh my god. I never thought of that!" Tom bit his nails in panic.

"You idiot!" Sam shrieked. He still couldn't believe it. The two brothers stood there in silence until Sam decided to break it.

"So, um, welcome to fatherhood?" Sam said but it ended up like a question. "You know, what if it doesn't work the first try?"

"That could happen?" Tom asked, a glimmer of hope in his eyes. Sam nodded, "Yeah. It's normal. She could ask Harrison again if it doesn't work and then you're back to your bachelor life! For now, it's time for the waiting game."

"Alright. Let the waiting game begin." Tom sighed. It was selfish of him, but he really hoped it wouldn't work.

-

"Tom!" You smiled through the phone.

"What? I'm kinda busy at the moment." Tom said as he typed away on his laptop and put you on speaker. "You're on speaker. Just tell me the thing you have to tell me."

"I'm pregnant!" You squealed.

"Oh shit!" Tom said loudly and put his head in his hands. His life was officially over.

"Tom?" You said. Tom's eyes widened in realization that he said it out loud, "I meant- oh shit! It actually worked the first time! That's- that's cool! Because you know, sometimes it doesn't work... the first time."

He quickly put you off speaker and pressed the phone to his ear. "So, what's your next move?"

"I'm telling the dad, of course! He'd be so thrilled!" You swooned.

"Y-Yeah! T-That's... yeah, you go do that. I'm really happy for you! It's all working out." Tom said, hoping that he masked his nervousness well. Thankfully, you were too happy to notice and he was glad.

"How-How will you tell him?" Tom asked.

"I'll buy him a mug that says 'best dad in the world!' or something." You giggled. "Both of us have been wanting this."

"Well, why aren't you dating?" Tom questioned. "I mean, he seems like a great guy. I approve of him. He's better than all of your exes."

Tom really meant that. He liked Harrison for you. He thought that both of you would be a great pair. He'd be lying if he said he didn't have romantic feelings for you before, but he realized that it was just strong infatuation. Nothing else. What both of you have was simply platonic.

"He's not ready to date." You explained. "But that's okay, because I'll be having his gorgeous baby! AAAAHHHHH I'M PREGNANT!!!!" You excitedly screamed.

Tom had to put his phone away from his ear so that you wouldn't break his eardrums. He was really happy that you were happy, but he couldn't help but feel scared when you find out that the baby was his.

He put the phone to his ear and said, "Well, good luck on telling him." He smiled, because you finally got what you wanted.

"Thanks, Tommy. Love you!"

"Love you too!" He hung up and quickly texted Sam about the news. Sam replied and texted: "Oh shit lmao good luck, daddy-o!"

Tom sighed deeply at his brother's response before drowning himself in work.

-

The whole time during your pregnancy, Tom found himself constantly checking on you. Despite the fact that you're carrying his baby, he still didn't like the idea of kids. It was a personal reason and he didn't know why. He was confused.

He remembered the phone call he got from you when you found out the gender of the baby. You were so happy and every time he thought about it, he smiled.

"I'm having a boy." You said happily.

Tom looked at you in shock for a few seconds until his face broke into a smile, "That's great! Wow. A boy."

A son. You're carrying his son and he doesn't know how to feel about it. As your best friend, you kept sending him pictures of the ultrasounds and you told him everything you were feeling during the pregnancy.

Tom did everything to support you, but in a subtle way, of course. You still thought that Harrison was the father of your baby and Tom didn't want to outshine that. He knew that Harrison would be a better father than him, but Tom wanted to be a father to his son too. It was then that he realized he wasn't opposed to the idea of having babies. He was just scared of having them and not being a good father.

But now, he has a son on the way and his son was in his best friend's womb. The person he loved and cared about was carrying his son. He thought it was amazing and for once in his life, he was genuinely happy and excited.

As much as Tom wanted to stay in London and check up on you and the baby, he had to go to New York for business. He doesn't know how long he'll be gone, but he knew it'd be awhile. When he gets back, his son would probably be walking already.

You, Tom and Harrison were at the airport and you were bidding him goodbye. Tom hugged you tight, but not too much, because he didn't want to hurt you.

"I'll miss you!" You cried.

"I'll miss you too! In fact, I already miss you." Tom said, chuckling. He pulled away and wiped your tears away. "Don't cry or the baby will look ugly."

"That's not a thing. You're just saying that." You lightly chuckled.

"Yeah so that you wouldn't cry and it worked." Tom smiled. He turned to Harrison and pulled him in for a hug as well, "Take care of my best friend, yeah?"

Tom was kind of scared to leave you, but he trusted Harrison.

Harrison surprisingly hugged back and said, "I will. You can trust me, mate. I'll call you when I don't know what to do."

Tom chuckled and pulled away, "Feel free to call anytime, then."

Tom didn't have time to say anything else, because his flight was being called. You frowned and said goodbye to him one last time. He waved at both of you and left.

𝐅𝐈𝐕𝐄 𝐘𝐄𝐀𝐑𝐒 𝐋𝐀𝐓𝐄𝐑...

It's been five years since Tom left and you haven't seen him since. During those five years, you managed to do a lot of things. You gave birth, you started officially dating Harrison, you moved in with him, nailing motherhood, talking to Tom from time to time, etc.

Tom was doing well. He was really happy with all the photos you sent him. He would smile at the photos, but the fact that he was the father of your son was still at the back of his mind. It's been five years and he still hasn't told you. He didn't know what to do, so he called Sam. Only Sam knew his secret, anyway.

"Hey Sam!" Tom greeted with a smile through the screen. Sam smiled at him and waved back. Tom squinted and asked, "Is that Harry?"

"Yeah! Harry's back!" Sam grinned.

"Hey Tom! I missed you!" Harry shouted in glee. Harry has been traveling the world for photography and he decided it was time to go back and slow down, because he was already twenty-nine years old.

"I missed you too, man!" Tom grinned.

"So, Tom... why'd you call?" Sam asked as he fixed his hair and moved a bit so Harry could fit in the frame.

"First of all, I'm coming back home tomorrow." Tom said.

"That's great!"

"We could finally hang out again!"

"Yeah and that's not all." Tom gulped.

"What's up?" Sam asked.

"Um, I still haven't told Y/N." Tom bit his lip.

Sam's eyes widened, already knowing what he was talking about, "WHAT?? IT'S BEEN FIVE YEARS, THOMAS."

"Tell Y/N what? What'd I miss?" Harry asked in confusion.

Sam sighed, "Tom's the father of Y/N's baby and Y/N doesn't know that because she knows that the father this whole time was Harrison. I'm sure she's confused after the baby came out, because guess what, Harry!"

"What?"

"Harrison's fucking blonde! And I've seen her son... he fucking looks like you, Tom." Sam said and Tom winced because it was true. He saw the pictures after all.

"Oh my fucking god, Tom. Tell her." Harry said in shock. "If I were Y/N, I'd be pissed you didn't tell me before."

"Yeah, that's what I said five years ago." Sam rolled his eyes.

"Calm down, will you? I'll tell her when I get back. I'll tell both of them." Tom said, mentally preparing himself and his speech.

-

You and Harrison invited Tom for dinner when he got back and Tom was nervous. He hasn't seen both of year for five years and he just randomly tells you that you and him have a child together.

You opened the door and squealed when you saw him. You hugged him and let him in yours and Harrison lovely home. It was just right for raising a family and Tom mentally cringed when he remembered his speech that he prepared.

"I missed you, Tom!"

"I missed you too, darling." Tom smiled softly as he took a good look at you. "Oh my god. Please don't murder me, but are you pregnant, by any chance? You're glowing."

You giggled and nodded, "Surprise! I'm two months pregnant now and I'm engaged too. Harrison and I decided we wanted the little guy to have a sibling."

Tom nodded, "That's great!"

"Thank you!" You grinned as you led him to the dining area.

All three of you sat on the dining table and all three of you were happily eating. Or maybe just you and Harrison. Tom was just poking his food around.

"I have something to say." Tom finally said.

"Oh, okay." Harrison said.

"What's up?" You asked. "You look like you have a major problem."

"It's about your son." Tom said.

"Caiden? What about Caiden?" Harrison asked.

Tom took a deep breath and took a sip of water before clearing his throat. He looked at both of you, "Please don't be mad, but I've been keeping a secret from you for years now."

"What?" You were confused. Harrison was confused too.

"I'm Caiden's father." Tom said.

"What?" Harrison asked as he looked at you. You looked at Harrison and shrugged, "Thomas, what are you talking about?"

"That night. Your pregnancy shit party. My drunk self did something stupid and-"

"What did you do?" You asked. Tom couldn't read the look on your face.

"I took the container where Harrison's sperm was and I took a peek, because I was- I was curious if he filled the whole container up and-"

"Dude, that's fucking sick." Harrison looked at him in horror.

"I know, I know and I'm sorry!" Tom panicked. "And then I guess I couldn't stand straight because the container fell in the sink and Harrison's thing fell in the drain."

Harrison's jaw dropped and so did yours. Tom bit his lip and sighed before continuing, "And so I cleaned the container and- and I replaced his sperm with mine, thinking it would help."

All three of you sat in silence after that. It was some news. It wasn't good news and it wasn't bad news. It was just... news.

Harrison cleared his throat and said, "I thought Caiden didn't look like me, because of weird genetics or something science related. Because it happens, you know? I heard that there's a really really small percentage that a baby would look different from its parents. Like, being ginger or something like that. So I thought it was that, but now that you said it, it makes sense."

You didn't say anything, because it was hard to process and it was hard to think that he probably kept it for so long.

"Caiden even got your hand washing trait. He has his own hand soap in the bathroom too." Harrison added and pursed his lips.

"Wait. Really?" Tom asked.

Harrison nodded. He looked tensed and you didn't blame him. Harrison wiped his mouth with the table napkin and gave you both a tight-lipped smile, "I'll just, uh, I need- I need some air."

You nodded and Tom closed his eyes and let his head hang low. Harrison stood up from his seat and quickly left to go to the backyard. You looked at Tom and frowned, "I wish you could've told me that same night, y'know? Before I did anything."

"I know and I'm sorry. I'm really really sorry." Tom opened his eyes and looked at you. "You were just so happy and then you had that speech and- I didn't want to ruin that."

"I'm sorry I didn't tell you sooner." Tom said sadly.

"You know, Harrison was upset because Caiden didn't have ANYTHING that resembled him. But he convinced himself that it was okay and it was this science shit that he mentioned. He probably feels like shit right now and I'll just clear my head, okay? I'll talk to you; we'll talk to you." You sighed as you stood up. Tom did the same. He didn't feel welcome. If he were being honest, it didn't feel right for him to sit there after he told you both.

"Thank you for telling us, Thomas. If you'll excuse me, my fiance needs me." You said softly and gave him a small smile before going to the backyard.

Tom looked down and escorted himself out of your house.

-

Harrison was obviously upset. The son he thought was his turned out to be someone else's. He felt really dumb, but he realized that Caiden didn't have to be related to him by blood for him to treat Caiden like his own son. He didn't see why that had to change. He loved Caiden with all his heart from the second he found out you were pregnant until now. Caiden was still the same Caiden he knew and loved. The only difference was, he wasn't the biological father after all. It was Tom.

Harrison knew you were kind of upset that Tom told you years later, but Harrison knew you didn't regret anything. Harrison didn't regret anything either. He loved taking care of you especially now that you're carrying HIS child this time. Both of you were very sure of that, because you two actually did it.

You still haven't spoken to Tom and Harrison kind of figured out that both of you were stubborn. So, he took it upon himself to reach out to Tom. He asked for Tom to meet up with him and Tom agreed. What Tom didn't know was that Harrison was bringing Caiden with him.

Harrison asked Tom to meet up with him at the park. He asked Tom if they could go for a morning run and Tom said yes. On the other hand, he told you that he was taking Caiden to the park for him to play with other kids. Of course, you agreed.

Tom wasn't there yet when Harrison arrived and he let Caiden join the other kids at the playground. Three minutes later, Tom arrived and asked, "Are we here so that you could punch me in the face or something? Because I think I deserve that."

Harrison smiled and shook his head, "No. My love for Caiden will never change whether I'm his biological father or not. And even if the world turns upside down, Caiden will still know me as his father."

Tom nodded, "I understand and I'm not trying to take him away from you if that's what you're thinking."

"That's good to know, because I don't know what I'd do without him." Harrison smiled and offered Tom to sit next to him. Tom sat down and waited for Harrison's next words.

"I just want to know what your plans are, because he's yours." Harrison said.

Tom shook his head, "Caiden's yours more than he's mine. I'm just a sperm donor if you think about it. But I do want to be part of his life. Maybe when he grows up, he'll understand. I want to help both of you in raising him and I want to thank you both for raising him well. He wouldn't be who he is without both of you and I appreciate that."

"I guess I just want him to acknowledge me as his dad too? Is that wrong? Because I can back off right now and pretend we didn't have this conversation." Tom added.

"No, it's not wrong. You have every right to say that, because you're his real dad." Harrison assured.

"But I can't take care of kids. Heck, I can't even take care of my own nephew before. I've always been the bachelor or the playboy or whatever everyone calls me and I've grown to like it? Like, I genuinely love it and wouldn't change anything else in the world. Caiden's just the cherry on top of it. I hope you don't mind, but uh, since he's kind of my son too..." Tom trailed off and Harrison nodded for him to continue.

"I fixed some papers and signed them. All I need are yours and Y/N's signatures... I want Caiden to inherit my company." Tom said. "No one else will have that but him and I'll teach him the ropes when he's of age and- it would be really nice to have an heir and Caiden's my only heir. I hope you understand."

"I do." Harrison said. "As much as I want Caiden to acknowledge you as his dad, I don't want him to forget about me and to start comparing." He chuckled.

"I won't do that to you or Y/N. I'll follow anything you guys say. So how will-"

"Daddy! Daddy! I found a snail near the slide!" a tiny voice called. Harrison glanced at Tom and grinned before looking at the child. Tom looked at where Harrison was looking at and his jaw dropped. Caiden was a spitting image of him and it warmed his heart.

"Caiden, buddy, I want you to meet uncle Tom." Harrison pulled the four year old to sit on his lap and ran his fingers through the child's hair.

Tom looked at him and smiled and he teared up a bit, "Hey buddy."

"Hi! I like your shirt." Caiden gave him a toothy grin. Tom looked down at his shirt before looking at Caiden, "You can have it when you're older."

Caiden's eyes widened and looked at Harrison who chuckled, "What'll you say, Caiden?"

"Thank you!" Caiden giggled. "I'll play again. Bye!" With that, Caiden got off from Harrison's lap and went back to play with his new friends.

Tom couldn't believe what just happened. Harrison said, "He knows we don't look alike, by the way. He doesn't seem to mind, though. But I know we should tell him as early as now that you're his real dad."

"I'm not opposed with that idea." Tom admitted. The two of them watched Caiden as they changed the topic and talked about life.

𝐀 𝐅𝐄𝐖 𝐌𝐎𝐍𝐓𝐇𝐒 𝐋𝐀𝐓𝐄𝐑...

You and Harrison finally told Caiden the truth. Tom was present, of course. He wanted to see how Caiden will react. Caiden didn't see anything bad about it, though. He loved it even more.

"So, uncle Tom is my real daddy?" Caiden asked one more time and all three of you nodded. Caiden grinned and said, "I have two daddies?"

"Well... yeah." You said with a shrug.

"That's cool!" Caiden giggled. He looked at Tom and pointed at Harrison as he did so, "I call my daddy already. What will I call you?"

"Anything you want." Tom said, not really bothered if he still calls him 'uncle Tom' or not.

"I'll call you papa." Caiden smiled and hugged him. Tom looked at you and Harrison in surprise and both of you just urged him to return the gesture because he wasn't sure.

Tom hugged back and it felt nice. He felt great. He then made a mental note to himself to hug his nieces and nephews.

From then on, all three of you agreed that Tom would have Caiden during Friday until Sunday and on some occasions when you and Harrison were busy. All three of you also agreed that there would be days when all four of you would go out to really bond.

You didn't really wish to have a family like this, but you did and if you were being honest, you wouldn't trade it for anything else in the world.

* * * *

this is the longest fic I've written here so far omg but i hope y'all liked it

𝐓𝐎𝐌 𝐇𝐎𝐋𝐋𝐀𝐍𝐃 𝐓𝐀𝐆𝐋𝐈𝐒𝐓: @abrielleholland​​​​ @poguesholland​​​ @superheroesaremytea​​  @marshxx​ @ella-whyte

𝐆𝐄𝐍𝐄𝐑𝐀𝐋 𝐓𝐀𝐆𝐋𝐈𝐒𝐓: @marvelousell​​​ @justasmisunderstoodasloki​ @rubberducky-jrr​ @petersholland​ @osterfieldnholland​ @miraclesoflove

[carewyncromwell]

3 and 11 for Jackson, 11 and 17 for Ru 💜

Who named them? (Mother, father, or someone else?)

Jackson got his name from his mama Cassandra Knightly, as a reference to his asshole father, John "Jack" Eglinton. He got the middle name "Lucas" as a reference to Cassandra's favorite tutor from her childhood, a wizard named Lucas Burke.

Do they like their name?

Jackson has a complicated relationship with his name. He hated it so much while he was in his father's captivity, hating having anything to do with this Muggle man who'd stolen him away from his mother, home, and magical future just to enrich himself...but it was really thanks to Adelia expressing such kindness toward his name upon them first meeting that made Jackson decide that he didn't need to discard his entire name, just to give a good old middle finger to his father and everything he stood for. Instead Jackson discarded his father's surname but kept his first name, so as to always remember the gutter where he started and use it as motivation to take the world by storm.

As for Ru, they really didn't have a name prior to disguising themselves as the human Rudolph Ollivander. And honestly, Ru's never liked the name Rudolph. Whenever they say it, it ends up coming out as a nasally scoff, like a horse blustering through their nose and mouth. "Ru" suits the kelpie's sensibilities much better, if for no other reason than it's less masculine -- Ru may present male a lot of the time, since that way they don't have to wear corsets and such, but they're still genderfluid and they don't like being stuck in a gendered box.

What is their opinion on nicknames?

LMAO, Jackson LOVES nicknames. He gives nicknames to everyone, stranger or not. For strangers, it's most common for Jackson to call them "Mr./Ms. [surname]" or some variation of "my dear [fill in the blank]" or "my [adjective] friend." (Ex: Orla @nightmaresart is his "lady Vipertooth.") Once you become one of his close friends, you'll get your own custom nickname, such as "Addy" and "Lia" for his BFF Adelia. Jackson also has several nicknames he'll accept for himself -- Jack, Jackie, Jacko, and Jax are most common. He'll only call you by your full first name if he loves you -- a privilege only extended to his beloved husband, Montelimar Bloom. 💕 @cursebreakerfarrier

As for Ru, they are solely called by a "nickname," so they're okay with them. They're not really the type to give other people nicknames, though, just because they're not human and so didn't grow up giving others with special names or titles. Rather than giving their friends nicknames, or even calling their partner Estrid by a special pet name, they're more likely to call people by their surname until they admit to themselves and that person that they like that person's company. At that point Ru will start using their first name, making it very clear why they're doing so as they are ridiculously blunt and don't see a need to beat around the bush.

Name Ask!

[shidoukanae]

YGO! Questionnaire

Tagged by @cipher-wise​

Favorite series:

My favorite series based on what I watched and enjoyed would have to be Arc-V!!! It's honestly the series that got me to adore YGO when previously I'd seen YGO as, and I chilidishly quote, "uncool". Everything about Arc-V is pretty much wonderful: Yuya's presence as a "everyone MUST be happy" kind of character in a plot that discusses themes of war, revenge, and despair is absolutely refreshing (especially when Yuya's ideals of happiness are stripped from him and made a mockery of by, *coughs* one of my favorite characters in the franchise *coughs*). 

I love how the four Yuu boys are a wonderful combination of "protagonists" (/anatagonists) and how they each play off of each other's weaknesses and strengths, often acting as mirrors to each other in their individual dimensions while having amazing interactions (Yugo and Yuri, anyone? Yuri and Yuya?).

I admire how the endgame plot is a perversion of Yuya's ideals: he gets what he wants, showering happiness upon all, but that "happiness" is corrupted into the notion of entertainment. While Yuya seeks to provide people with smiles and laughter, to give them hope to work together through tough times and to stay strong in the face of adversity, his "counterparts" in the endgame are really good at acting as Yuya's mirror: showing that his style of performing can also be used to appease the bloodthirst of one's own self and that happiness can be corrupted into self-deserving power.

...Hard to put that into exact words without spoiling a lot of things but, gosh, let's just say that Yuri and ____ are the perfect mirrors to Yuya in terms of what his entertainment dueling style is meant to be.

The plot over all is pretty good! I won't lie and say it stands strong all the way throughout the story but the first half is amazing and there are some pretty strong episodes in the second half (Yugo and Rin, the parasite episodes in general, Yuri Yuri YURI). I can definitely say that the humor is there, the characters are amazing (if nothing else, watch for the Yuu Boys, the Bracelet Gals, and Shun versus Sora!!) and having come into the show around episode 104, I was pleasantly surprised by the trip Arc-V brought me and how it played with its protagonist, giving him hope, kicking him down, and toying with his mind - just like the way a warzone might to any idealistic individual.

In terms of other series, I like VRAINS but only up to like episode 19 (or the end of the Data Bank arc). It had potential and I kept hoping it would get better but the plot was constantly floundering, there are plot holes abundant (sewer monsters, ugh), character development is inconsistent not to mention very shallow, VRAINS has some of the best side characters but they're kicked to the curb by a bland protagonist and a villain that could've been so much cooler but they made him a sympathetic mess.

...I have a lot of gripes with VRAINS but, if it were to ever be rewritten with clear goalposts and plot twists in mind (not to mention development on ideas like Charisma Duelists because at the end of the show I still have not a fucking clue what a Charisma Duelists is or was) I would say it has potential to become my favorite series but Arc-V clearly beats it for me in every category lmao.

Zexal’s also really good too!!! I don’t get all the hate behind it because it’s actually really interesting and engaging (also IV’s definition of fanservice is literally the only type of fanservice I will ever accept) and I think I’ve even cried a couple of times during the course of the plot which is like,,, shocking considering it’s not a show I thought I’d cry over (I cried in Arc-V too but goddamn does tiny Yuya just want to make you tear up lmao). This show is really good emotionally and it’s literally so stupid how Kaito carries a lot of the early and middle game of the show yet most of the meat of the plot doesn’t begin to unravel until the second season.

Also, if you ever want to watch a show of 100+ episodes that is so masterfully written that there is foreshadowing for stuff in like episode 130+ on EPISODE ONE, please watch this. Literally there are so many hints of what is going to happen in the future in the early episodes and you won’t really be able to tell what those hints are until you’ve finished the show but goddamn when you go back and rewatch things it does indeed feel amazing how much foreshadowing they threaded into the show without you ever knowing...(please don’t search for spoilers if you intend to watch this. I went into the show knowing some spoilers tho not all and, while I was still pleased by what I watched, I honestly can agree the show is A Lot Better without knowing ANYTHING)

Favorite Protagonist: Yuya. For sure, out of all the series, Yuya. 

He’s a refreshing protagonist, especially considering he shines in a world of war and despair. He’s also someone who you empathize with right at the start and want to hope in, especially since he is the “happiness” in a word of “madness” and “sorrow”. He’s not someone out to save the world (not really, anyways), but his actions touch on the lives of others anyways, giving people in a hope in a world that is otherwise cruel and heartless. Also, it really helps that he’s able to pull you into his world of “egaos”, making you believe in him and root for him despite how cheesy his ideals may or may not sound.

Also love how, despite being the centerpiece of “happiness”, Yuya isn’t allowed to always be happy :> Not spoiling plot related things but if you like protagonists going off the rails insane at times, Yuya’s definitely a fun protagonist for that!!!

Favorite Rival:

Kaito Tenjou!!! Literally the best rival in the series that I’ve seen. Everything about him is literally perfect ngl. From the way he’s chillingly introduced, with the spine-tingling whistles and cruel, almost merciless nature, to the way he slowly becomes sympathetic while also remaining a terrifying presence whenever he appears...I love him????

Favorite BFF:

Does Shoichi count? Because like...he’s Yusaku’s closest friend and ally in the series and I generally don’t pay attention to the other BFF’s in the other series (or at least, the ones I can recall bc I know in Zexal that Yuma has a whole group of friends lmao).

But I like Shoichi!! He cares about Yusaku a lot, is pretty damn cool as a sidekick hacker, his sideplot with his brother was actually honestly endearing and I loved the mystery about him. His early-game jokes w/ Ai to tease Yusaku were also a good laugh.

Favorite GFF: 

Not a girl friend forever for the main protagonist (although she like...lowkey confessed to him...though that plot really never went anywhere so I still don’t know what the fuck THAT was about) but,,, Ema Bessho,,

If y’all knew me back in my peak YGO days when VRAINS was airing,,, this gal was and STILL is my favorite girl of the YGO series. Even though she was pretty much done dirty imo I still love her (even despite considering she’s been made a damsel-in-distress at least three times, she’s only ever won one duel on-screen despite being supposedly good at dueling, ngl they could’ve done so much more with her but tbh she’s mostly just an asset to solve problems at whim and barely gets character development/does nothing but watch and spectate stuff late-game).

Even though she’s like...the unfortunate side character who’s probably meant to be more fanservice than interesting, in the first 19 episodes (and even the Revolver vs. her fight as well as the one time she meets Aoi IRL early-game) made her out to be a lot cooler and complex than she ended up being. I mean,,, a hacker gal who’s self-serving, cynical, and cold-hearted taking on the tasks of her (potentially ex) boyfriend while being really nice to his sister to the point she baffles even herself,,, we could’ve had a really unique and cool character to play around with here but instead we got...cool-ass character with potential to be something more reduced to a spectator with nothing better to do than idolize the main protagonist and have a plot with her brother that honestly detracted from her character more than it added to it imo.

Also Ema could’ve been a female Yuri but,,, nope,,, they decided she was better as a background piece instead TwT

Favorite Villain: Yuri.

Literally Yuri.

I could choose the leather jacket w/ fluff boi in a certain series because hot damn was that guy convincing AF that he wasn’t an evil psychopath (and even while knowing that he was, I still got fooled into thinking he was a good guy somehow omg) however,,, I’ve always held a love for Yuri and the way he’s been portrayed.

Despite ALWAYS being the bad guy, the show has always made this purple fucker into the most entertaining character on-screen. He even beats Yuya sometimes in terms of how entertaining he is - that’s literally how good he is,,

Also his facial expressions are amazing, he’s a VERY VALID threat to the main cast (and his creeper levels are not only off the charts but literally called out by the main female protagonist herself lmao), and he acts as the perfect foil to Yuya, battling not to entertain others but to entertain himself.

Also, he likes killing people.

No this is not a joke.

He literally likes killing people. And is pretty sadistic about it, too.

(^^^^ for those who don’t get the joke, “Fusion” is pronounced “Yuugo” which sounds similar to “Yugo” which is what,,, Yuri is making fun of,,, more context is needed of course but this is a Great Running Gag)

Favorite card:

I don’t know if it actually exists as an actual card but...that crystal dragon from the YGO movie with the glass pyramid. Blue-Eyes Shining Dragon...it’s really pretty...I love it...

Favorite Episode:

I’m...too lazy to search for names of these episodes but I can give brief summaries of them,,, because I can’t choose,,,

Arc-V: Shun vs. Sora (ALL episodes). Hot damn if you have never watched YGO but want to try and see for yourself why people like it: WATCH THESE EPISODES. I can’t explain how amazing these episodes are and, while I admit jumping straight into them might have you missing out on some important context (such as who Shun is or why Sora’s battle tactics lead to revelation) it’s honestly an amazing fight regardless. The battle starts off plain enough - there’s obvious tension, it seems like a typical fight of a battle royale, etc. - my god does the battle ramp up in emotional tension and promptly kick you in the gut with not only how blindsided you’ve been, but it also showcases just how cruel these “entertainment duels” can really get.

Any episode with Yuri. Literally any episode he’s in. 

I think this is like...episode 8 of VRAINS...but whenever it is that Akira hires Ema to find the reason why Aoi just...straight up got knocked into a coma. Literally this is my favorite episode when it comes to Ema. The way she makes fun of Akira even while aware of his situation,,, her cruel selfishness and desire for money bubbling to the surface, the way she confesses how she can’t be trusted willingly and still asks Akira why he’s hiring her,,, god I love this episode in terms of what Ema could’ve always been.

Episode 13 (/14?) of Zexal!!! This is the episode Kaito appears and when the show REALLY picks up. Kaito is a fun bastard of a rival and tbh I don’t think I’ll ever stop getting chills of him walking in, debris frozen in time all around him, as he approaches his victim, whistling an eerie children’s tune as he gets ready to close in for the kill,,,,

Favorite Deck to Use:

I don’t...really play the game itself but...I have used a couple of decks and I guess you can say I really love Raid Raptors??? First of all, those warbirds make really fun sounds I love ‘em in the anime but they’re also just fun to use in general (even tho I used a,,, very basic deck for them,,, I love them still).

Fusion, Ritual, Synchro, XYZ, Pendulum or Link:

XYZ bc it’s really the only summoning method I’m used to lol :P. Also XYZ loyalist I guess???? 

Years in fandom: roughly five to six years iirc? I mean, I was a fan of the early day YGO and watched it as a kid but not active enough to be in the fandom for it lmao. Also not in the fandom atm because Sevens lost my attention (it’s a good show!!! I’m just unfortunately more a fan of things with serious plots and darker themes and it’s hard for me to stomach slice-of-life shows that don’t focus on a mature and engaging plot). However, Arc-V and Zexal holds a special place in my heart (as does VRAINS, begrudgingly) and so I occasionally find myself wandering back to these shows like right now,,, 

[awsugar]

Told you about this months ago but anyway anon who's mostly a gay dude now but was still dating a girl back then.

We 100% broke up by now (there was a phase where it was uh... Not 100% clear where we were but whatever that is a different story I guess) anyway she has flip flopped from yeah being friends is cool to I hate you so much you ruined my entire life and future (shes 22) and I will never be happy again or love anyone else. And like telling me she still after months just breaks down and cries on the kitchen floor for hours

Anyway we decided to take a break from talking. We decided that a couple of times but this time I haven't talked to her since march first directly. We both wrote in a group chat we're both in like maybe three times and she messaged me 3-4 times but I haven't answered those.

And like

I feel so free? I have talked more to my best friend this month than I have in years because I spent so much energy on this girl.

Talking to her got so exhausting towards the end I could only stand it for about ten minutes before I wanted to quit but of course the conversations always lasted longer than that so I avoided WhatsApp all together and thus all my contacts there.

Turns out talking to my bff is no problem I can still talk to him for hours if I don't have to talk to her too it's wow

Sorry this got long

I just don't know what to do after this month because I'm my ex's only fucking friend. She doesn't talk to anyone else really except for the people in the aforementioned group chat maybe but thats only active every couple months now and she always refers to them as being my friends and not hers.......

idk how long you guys were dating but it can definitely take a long time to get over it for some people and i think the things she’s saying to you aren’t fair but at the same time she sounds like she’s really going through it so i’d cut her a little slack i’ve been there and we all act a little crazy sometimes when our hearts are broken. i’ve 100% been the crazy ex before so while i think she’s acting irrationally i feel a little solidarity lmao. i think your best thing to do is try to ignore it/cut off communication like you are. the more you talk to her the harder it will be for her to get over it. ik you say you’re her only friend and that SUCKS like it really does and i’ve been in her shoes kinda but from your perspective like. i think you have to do what’s best for you. i don’t think it’s selfish, i think it’s prioritizing your own wellbeing and happiness and i think we all should do that, as long as you do it in a kind way. and maybe someday when she’s moved on you can be friends again if you’d want that/if you think it would work. 

besides that i’m really glad YOU feel better and that you’re able to talk to your best friend more. i think tons of people are guilty of ignoring their friends when they’re in a relationship so it’s good you’re getting that time in again now. <3

[kuronokiseki]

A Honest Review of Nostalgia? (feat. Romantica)

Took my time to gather enough courage to write this ^^;;

So here goes my unneeded opinions...

Warning: Contains -

1. Opinions

2. Bad analyzing skills

First thing first, the premise. Just from reading the blurb I already knew where Nostalgia is heading, how things will not end up pretty... And it baffles me that many ppl are realizing it now? Your tyrannical boss turns out to be your ex and he wants to make you his again. Isn’t that just scary xD Then again, doesn’t trouble me that much bcs I don’t get the logic that queer relationships always have to be happy and healthy when relationships irl aren’t always sunshine and rainbows regardless if it’s queer or not. But yeah, that’s not the actual problem, instead some ppl can be uncomfortable with its portrayal and it may be triggering.

Moving onnnn to the first chapter, haha I did remember watching the sih anime but I can’t even recall what the hell happened in the two seasons. Reading the first chapter again for the second time I’m reminded once again of how boring the plot of Nostalgia is in general xD The beautiful animation and ost didn’t manage to fool me, heck yah~ I think 90% of the plot is just abt manga publishing + whatever happened 10 years ago. I tried so hard to like the characters but I can’t, I found all of them are one-dimensional as opposed to Romantica’s more quirky yet deeper cast. Like, sure Usagi loves Misaki too frickin much that without him he’ll die (lol) but his character arc isn’t limited to anything related to Misaki.

Even I saw some Japanese reviewers complaining how slow the plot moves , they even used the snail emoji bwahaha 🐌 When I thought Romantica can be repetitive and boring at times, but good lord Nostalgia has it even slower. If there’s another chapter abt senpai flashback again in the future seriously I will imagine there’s a wall in front of me and bonk my head against it (no way I would do that with a real wall it will hurt ;-;) Like c’mon. They need to stop fixating on the past. Of course Romantica has flashback chapters too but it’s to add something new, but in Nostalgia’s case it will hinder them to move forward hence the barely progressing plot

Now I would like to comment on the love rivals. Excluding An, all the love rivals are annoying me xD Why? Bcs their existence doesn’t do much other than for drama. Yokozawa is the typical jealous ex, Haitani is a Sumi copycat and Nao is just another Yokozawa but this time pursuing Ritsu. Lol Nakamura what just happened. As for Romantica’s love rivals, we know that their roles aren’t just to spice things up. Sumi kickstarted massive character developments of both Usagi and Misaki, yeah he’s approaching Misaki only to try getting into Usagi’s pants but hey he still cares genuinely for Misaki and they remained bffs after that. Won’t comment on Mizuki since he’s not rly a love rival. I’ve grown meh over Kaoruko so won’t talk abt her too. In Haruhiko’s case, him pursuing Misaki is just a small part in in his and Usagi’s already strained relationship, and it’s to show how the two brothers doesn’t rly differ from each other. As for Ijuuin... Lol I know he can be annoying but let’s be honest he acts as a perfect foil to Usagi and their banters  are so fun to watch (with Jojo-esque sound effects haha).

Now getting past the plot, characterization... It’s time to talk abt Takano and Ritsu’s relationship. Personally I still think that their relationship can still be fixed, especially on Takano’s end. He needs to give Ritsu some space, that poor boy needs time to carefully sort out his thoughts and feelings, I can tell how much Ritsu is confused with himself. He has to APOLOGIZE,  and put Ritsu’s feelings before his own. He can’t just do whatever he pleased and telling Ritsu what to do, given that they’re not even dating yet for now.

As for Ritsu... If he couldn’t voice it out, then he shouldn’t force himself to. There are lots of other ways to express your love and it isn’t just saying “I love you.” Believe it or not, it’s actually possible for a couple who haven’t said I love you to each other directly to still enjoy a happy relationship. Just ask Victuuri lmao.

Last but not least, my expectations of Nostalgia in future chapters. Uhh, I have to say that I’m pretty neutral on whether they will still end up together or they will break up but honestly the latter part seems impossible ^^;; Now that the countdown is getting close and Ritsu’s probably going to confess, but I will be quite disappointed if he does as soon he and Takano meet again. I don’t think that would be a right timing, given how things are going now. It should be done when things are properly sorted out between them and Takano not only apologized but turned over a new leaf as well. I do strongly think that the current Takano doesn’t deserve Ritsu’s confession as per now.

And that’s all my totally not-objectively-right opinions. Thank you for reading :)

[critlitcomwriter]

DISCLAIMER: None of the events in these letters are true. Any character or person mentioned is fictional. I do not own any gifs posted. This was written as a purpose for an English assignment.

Dear Mama and Pops,

I am writing this to let you know that I have left home for the summer to pursue an amazing opportunity. The group that recruited me is called the Illuminati. I know you have probably heard so many lies about the organization via social media and the news, but I can guarantee you that I will be so safe here. Please think of it as more of an internship, if anything. I will be learning precious life skills and will have many opportunities to network in the greater Los Angeles area. It will only be for a few months and then I can probably start working from home. Also, I don't know much about the scientology religion but apparently I will be needing to convert, but don't worry, I won't let them actually make me believe in that stuff. Dad, I will always live for our Lord and savior Jesus Christ. Mom, will you please make sure that my fish Dory is fed at least twice a day? I would really appreciate it. I love you both so much. I will send another letter very soon.

Miss you more than anything,

Your Lilybird

Alyssa,

If you have tried to contact me in the last 72 hours, my phone was taken from me so dont worry, I am not ignoring you. You are not going to fucking believe where the fuck I am right now dude. So basically, I was at the grocery store and I started chatting away with this really rich old guy and he basically handed me $100,000 (ok not really, it was venmo’d to me) to join the illuminati lmao. Idk dude, I’ve been trying to say yes to more things and I feel like this could really help me out in the future lol. I guess we’ll see haha. Anyways, so far I’ve met so many celebrities. I’m bunk mates with some girl from Twilight, apparently she's been a bitch to everyone here because her ex boyfriend is in the cult too and the people in charge force them to sit together at lunch. Hahaha get fuuuuuucked. I'll update you with details the next time I can send a letter but yeah. Fucking wild right? How's your summer going? Catch me up on everything. I miss you dude, promise this will go by sooooo fast, okay? Try not to think about me too much ;)

Your bff ALWAYS,

Lily

Dear Professor Mason,

Unfortunately, I will be unable to show my face via zoom for Finance 317 this summer. I have an amazing opportunity interning with a secret society and am banned from showing my current location. I also am only allowed to send physical letters when contacting others outside of the organization. I hope you find this as a valid excuse. I will be working directly under Steve Jobs, Oprah Winfrey, and Kim Kardashian. If you need any proof of documentation, I can have their people fax over my W-9. Please know that I wouldn't have agreed to this unless COVID-19 wasn't so prevalent. Like you said last week, the job market is so scarce lately. I’m afraid this will be my only chance to have any type of interning experience before I graduate. I do apologize for any inconvenience this may bring you. Let me know if there is anything you need from me. My bosses pay quite a bit more than Chapman and they are currently looking for a financial analyst.

Sincerely,

Liliana T.

[noablke]

Noah Liam Blake

hey, is that [ PENN BADGLEY ] in san amore? of course not, it’s just [ NOAH BLAKE ]. [ HE/HIM ] is/are [ 30 ] years old, identifies as [  MALE ] and has been a resident here for [ 2 YEARS ]. they keep themselves busy as a/an [ BARTENDER ]. though they may come across as [ + CHARISMATIC  ] and [ + METICULOUS  ], don’t be fooled too easily as they can also be [ - RECKLESS ] and [ - WITHDRAWN ]. i wonder what trouble they’re going to bring.

ok hi ya’ll i’m jess and are you ready 4 the ride of your life! i jk, noah is actually normal compared to how i used to write ..* looks off into the distance* ... a long time ago 

Age: Dirty 30

Birthday: January 12th, 1990

Place of Birth: Whitehall, Michigan

Hometown: Detroit, Michigan

Left handed

Sign: Capricorn

Ok so basics: straight male, vegan, loves popcorn

Parents:

Leanne Hall and Richard Blake

Mom died during child birth due to complications and sepsis

Father raised him till about the age of 5 then surrendered guardianship over to Leanne’s mother and father - due to admitting to being a young unfit parent and wanted the best for him

Father ended up getting married to his step mom when he was 10 and he now has two younger siblings.

Noah and his dad have an ok relationship... could be better tbh 

grandfather doug is his bff 5ever tbh

AGE AND MAJOR EVENTS THAT SHAPED NOAH:

5 Years of age

started school in Detroit when he moved to be with his grandparents

7 years of age

started showing signs of compulsiveness and agitation towards little things

8 years of age

diagnosed with bipolar disorder at an early age after months and months of evaluations, which wasn’t a surprise, his mother suffered heavily from it and was actually diagnosed at an early age

11-12 years of age

joined baseball to help with manic episodes and it helped manage it

14-15 years of age

manic depression started kicking in harder

16 years of age

discovered smoking cigarettes and marijuana, met his longtime girlfriend emily sullivan, quit baseball :( 

16 1/2 years of age

attempted suicide twice, failed, has a long scar on his right wrist up to his forearm

17 years of age

became a heavier cigarette smoker, his “pops” (his grandpa) helped him buy cigarettes till he was of age, his grandfather is a smoker as well and is not proud he developed this habit, but as long as it helps him control himself he supports him

18 years of age

barely graduated high school, and decided college wasn’t his thing so he continued to stay in the work force as a waiter at a small diner

19 years of age

Emily and him moved into a studio apartment together in downtown Detroit. They end up having a small wedding when they find out Emily is expecting.

20 years of age

They lost the baby at 25 weeks. Her name was going to be piper. Emily made bad decisions during her pregnancy which resulted in this. Noah’s depression got worse because he knew he could of prevented her from hurting their child. He started to draw himself away from emily which only led her to finally leave him because she could not deal with his mental state anymore. 

21-22 years of age

Noah decided to live back with his grandparents to clear his head since his grandmother found out she was sick. He ended up taking night classes at a community college. Everything was starting to look up. He saw a weekly therapist, and was stable on new medications. He signed papers to divorce emily from the stupid decision he was when they were teens. She was doing well the last time he spoke to her. She ran off with an older male.

23-24 years of age

Noah decided to live with his father for about a year in Vermont. His father remarried and ended up having two children. His father and him started to rebuild their relationship. Richard made Noah his apprentice at his bar. Working at the bar really seemed to help him focus.

25 years of age

Noah found himself back in Detroit. His grandmother passed away. Noah attempted suicide again and this time he almost succeeded. Spent almost two months in he was actually “safe” to be released.

26-27 years of age

Officially got a diagnosis of bipolar 2 disorder with more of manic depression than mania. Slowed down on smoking, he’s more of a social smoker now. Started living a more healthier life style to give him more energy. Dated a girl  for about a year (18 months). She had a vegan diet which inspired him to try it as well. It ended up sticking and he found that he was a lot more energetic. She just shed so much light in his cloudy life. They had to go their separate ways. They both wanted different things for the future. Mutual breakup. No hatred between them.

28 years of age

made his way out of Michigan finally after finding a new job as a few time bartender in a small town called san amore

29-30 years of age

still in town, his depression has stabilized, and things are better. He’s finally happy he can actually live his life~ (maybe >:) i jk )

Wanted connections

drinking buddy/town homie 

fwb because those are fun ok

a usual who comes into the bar and like they have a cute friendship

his therapist lmao

somebody who actually finds out he’s actually very not ok :)

that one person who he’s happy to feed these vegan cookies he likes to make (yes omg he cooks what a cupcake)

gym buddy

childhood bestfriend

maybe his cute vegan ex idk

I love plots and I love feels so come @ me ok

[partyinthemysterymachine]

🌻🌻🌻🌻 🚜 it's like a little garden!

hello lil garden <3 im gonna pick all the floweurs :3

there are like two dreams i remember pretty vividly: one, i had stigmata. (fun fact: i’m a jew) i woke up and i could feel the pain in my palms and feet. i was like. maybe in fifth or sixth grade. everything happens when i’m 13 or 14 because i have exactly zero memory and Bad Brain Disorder Origin Years just makes everything a sad mockery of mashed potatoes

the second dream i remember vividly was essentially that i discovered a door to Wonderland (and listen here u lil shits: i’m not a big Wonderland person, not even a Mad Hatter kinda gal despite whatever my past has said about me, and also my Jervis Tetch is super valid and prob one of the best out there you’re welcome) in this honestly gorgeous old mansion. the kind that’s just. tons of dark wood, narrow halls, winding and yet there’s a lot of natural light, like gorgeous. and i found a door to Wonderland and holy fucking shit

what i would give to actually find a door to that Wonderland, bye y’all peace it’s been a gas but i gotta run

so after i left i wanted to go back, and i had a rough time finding the portal and ok long story short it turned out i had to go deal with a unicorn cult (it was more intense than that but hey, cults amirite) in order to get the reagents to go back to Wonderland and i suddenly found myself falling in a huge cave and the spirit healer from WoW was there so that says a lot about where i was in my life at the time

still tryna go back to Wonderland

i made this guy in Sims4 and he’s really fuckin cute and i named him Lane Morgans. i’m gonna put his tag on this post so maybe you’ll go take a look at him and see how amazing he is but i’m just gonna jerk myself off here too

(also sidenote, Salutations (my farmer in sdv, also top notch) is his uncle and when i wrote up his first char sheet i fucked up his last name bc his last name can’t be Morgans, but i’ll give him another one Soon(tm) (no i won’t))

Lane is a retired rollercoaster engineer who is now writing romance novels. he’s doing absolutely amazingly and his twitter a mess in a good way. he wishes he was Chuck Tingle’s bff. his novels aren’t modeled after Tingle’s (hehe), he writes very well rounded, interesting, and diverse romance that doesn’t take itself seriously. because i do what i want, he’s pretty well known and on several bestsellers.

he’s like in his 40s by now i think and he’s a late transitioner. he’s a divorcee (he and his ex wife are really good friends it’s all good) and he had his son Ellis awhile back (who is just a whole dutch cookie tin of crayons and then some). at a singles mixer he met a gardener who would be his future husband and everything is amazing now

also side braids and ponytails run in the family i guess

(actually Salutations has been side ponytail like all his life and Lane was enchanted by it so he side braids. Salutations is very proud)

i still think about it honestly i was really into keeping up to date with junk food news and food product for a while there but the popular sites were starting to piss me off with their rating systems and reviews like holy entitlement and superiority complex, batman! so i dropped out of it, like the only one that is still super valid is onsecondscoop.com tho it’s been a real hot minute since

i have a lot of my parents’ vinyls and that includes The Beatles white album with some water damage bc i guess my dad knocked something over at some point but also the good stuff like Fleetwood Mac, Linda Ronstadt, America, Seals and Crofts, a lot of musicals, James Taylor, Gordon Lightfoot, Cat Stevens (now Yusuf), Earth, Wind, and Fire, Marvin Gaye and more!!! (and i left a whole shitload in chicago too) and it’s very telling about my musical tastes. 

i had ordered Arctic Monkeys’s AM album and it skipped on No. 1 Party Anthem and some other song and so i was like :\ and ordered another and you’ll never guess,

a few songs stand out to me:

Gordon Lightfoot’s Approaching Lavender 

Seals and Crofts’s Hummingbird

Fleetwood Mac’s Silver Springs

James Taylor’s Never Die Young, Line ‘Em Up, Shower The People

(the Fleetwood Mac and James Taylor songs are specifically the ones i was introduced to with, as in the Live versions of Silver Springs and Shower The People)

for those who don’t know i’m also a huge Enya fan (LOTR was good to me) and Dark Sky Island was sick af btw, and also Donna Lewis’s entire Now In A Minute album is pretty fuckin close to my soul

however probably my favorite song, most sacred to me, hard to explain it but just the. whew the memories attached is I Love You Always Forever

furthermore a song that still really creeps me out (that also has an origin story attached to it) is 98 Degrees a cappella cover of She’s Out Of My Life (yep! still no thanks)

i grew up around a cappella since my mom is like a lifetime member of the Sweet Adelines womens a cappella organization or w/e so yeah and i’m not ognna link this on bc it’s a bitch to find just by itself, but Lida Rose from The Music Man is also a fist clench...

now on a more depressing note but one i have mention, Spice Girls’s Viva Forever is uuuhhh hhhhhhhhh hhhhhhnnnnmmmmmmmmmmm 

anyway my dad used to travel overseas for work and when i was younger he went to Germany (and he’d go back there several times after) and he brought me back my first jar of Nutella. naturally i lost my entire shit, and imagine my surprise when Nutella got really big in America lmao he’d brought that jar home like. uh. 7, 9 years prior?? idk guys, ages and math, but it was funny to me

best fucking gingerbread recipe is by Nigella Lawson and i found it in her book How To Be A Domestic Goddess and it’s right fucking here ur welcome 

i’m definitely one of those people who picks a book with a cool cover, reads a couple pages and then decides if i’m taking it or not and that’s how i found like so many good books

ask me about The Passage series and how i am both in love with it and kinda mad (also lmao @ the failed TV show y’all fuckin dumb as hell)

[prongsmydeer]

Ayesha Liveblogs One Tree Hill S1

No matter how many times I watch the pilot I consistently forget that Nathan and Peyton used to date

“Don’t bother showering tonight” is that really your come-on Peyton I will never understand sports

Lmao @ Nathan and Peyton “OTP: Distracted Driving”

“You’re despicable, you know that,” said Dan, a literal future murderer

I’m always so thrown when ppl in shows start drinking at their workplaces like what kind of bold behaviour Whitey you work at a high school

“What are you wasting your time at now?” Nathan ur a terrible boyfriend

“I say that the people who pray here are wasting their time. God doesn’t watch sports” I know Lucas is pretentious as all hell but this is my favourite line in any sports show ever

Karen is such a good mom ahhhhh like she just wants Lucas to be happy and she knows he’ll put other people’s happiness first 

Dan calling Lucas ‘this kid’ like he’s not his wholeass son what a dick

It’s not lost on me that Keith telling Lucas stories about his father means that it’s Lucas’s grandfather Keith Scott is truly the only dad in this show who matters

“So why’d you just tell me all that” because he loves to monologue

“If I could [change the fact that Lucas exists], I would” Dan answer your door I need to send you a very rude telegram

I am in love with Moira Kelly and also I want Karen to punch Dan

The music of this show is really.... transcendent 

Djhfkjhfkjh since Lucas is implied to have like, five friends.... is that crowd of supporters hugging him just a bunch of people who think Nathan is a dick

I admire Lucas for deciding he was gonna put up with all this bullshit to do something he loves

Omg I forgot that Brooke wasn’t in the pilot she’s such a major character

“Nice hands” “Nice legs” Emo flirting in a jock setting lmaooooo

My inner 2007 angst awakens every time I hear Gavin Degraw. He is THAT bitch

“You ever think I might want to talk” Peyton and Nathan’s relationship is truly nothing but blind horniness they have nothing in common at all in this juncture of their lives

“I didn’t invite you to come in, I just asked if you wanted to” Peyton is so weird but I kind of want to marry her. Is this what Lucas feels like

Lucas’s economic status is really part of Brooke’s romance criteria at the age of 17 they teach the bourgeois early huh

Oh my god I cannot BELIEVE Jake recommended Atlas Shrugged to Lucas jhjhgjhgjh the undertones of this basketball show really are about capitalism

HAHAHAH Nathan’s word being “revenge” calm down Sasuke Uchiha

I haven’t said so yet but Haley is so very endearing she’s great

God. Lucas turning around to reveal to Dan that he’s cast away his name. HE is that bitch

Ghjkghjkgh Keith hissing at the rude Boosters mum. Love of my life

“Maybe he’s gay” “No, I think he’s just nice” who writes this dumbass show

“Do you even care that it’s slipping away” maybe it’s because I went away for university but the idea that someone is this deeply invested in their kid’s high school basketball career is. A lot

Nathan simultaneously trying to bother Lucas and pass English while about to fall in love: I can multitask!!!

Update: He also managed to trash Lucas’s favourite basketball court somehow in all his business. He really can multitask!

“If it makes you feel any better I called some woman a bitch the other day” [giggle] I love Karen and Lucas’s relationship

Haley is such a good friend to Lucas and hoo boy Nathan when do you grow a conscience

“You’re both so broody. You could brood together” that’s it, that’s Peyton and Lucas

These emails and VCR references are really dating this show

Nathan is a straight up sociopath in these early eps my god he humiliates Lucas publicly twice at this party and just pops over to Haley like “Hey cutie :) Idk why Lucas is so mad :) I’m rlly nice :)”

Nathan really taking his girlfriend’s car to hit on another woman how much of a crapbag

As soon as I said this he (drunk?) drove her car into a streetlight my god 

Deb and Karen having a nice lesbian coffee shop AU would be a pleasant turn in this show instead of literally anything that happens in either of their narratives

“Why would you even go there” “Because I loved getting dumped on” That is... accurate

“I’ll call you when you’re not so PMS” said Nathan, when his (ex) girlfriend rightfully lambasted him for crashing her car

I take it back Peyton and Nathan do have one thing in common it’s their disregard for traffic laws

HELL YEAH Keith IS your dad Lucas <3 <3 <3 <3 

Whitey talks a lot of shit for someone who advised Dan to abandon Luke 

I had been wondering why Lucas had the Scott name when Dan is such an ephemeral piece of shit and I guess there’s my answer thanks Karen 

Does Haley ever find out about the shit Nathan pulled at the party I feel like these are relevant details in her budding affection

“Dad send you to spy on me? Poison my drink?” This is the second time in two episodes Deb has been accused of being Dan’s spy I wonder if she still considers that a red flag 17 years into marriage

“One of the boys doesn’t have a father” BUUUUURN Dan

Rhkgjhgjkh the last moment of this scene:

Keith: There is enough room in my heart for each of my brother’s mistreated sons even the rude ones Nathan

Nathan, experiencing a split second of paternal love: :O

Ghkjghkjgh the Scott bonding in hatred of Dan continues with Lucas asking Nathan if he too would like to spite Dan:

Lucas: You will be receiving your “I Hate Dan Scott” Club invitation in the mail shortly Nathan, mom, Uncle Keith and I hold meetings biweekly

Nathan: Biweekly as in every two weeks or twice a week 

Lucas: Both! See you on Tuesday

“Does this mean we’re dating” yes it does the mixed CD is emo code

“Good luck with your game” “yeah, you too, Ma” hehehehe

Someone revoke this college medic’s license hoo boy

Ghjghkgh Lucas keeping his money tucked into his boxers what a doofus

I can’t believe Nathan and Lucas’s second big bonding moment is threatening dudes while in their boxers after beating on each other what a brotherly bond lmao

Okay but highkey if ur a lady and ur friends are gonna leave you alone and vulnerable at night get new friends

“I can live without my shirt” Nathan is thirteen shades of petty lmaooo

Dan is such a bad (abusive) father that Nathan literally would prefer to have none at all my god 

“Can I tell you a secret? I pretended too” just get marrrried 

“Thanks for cutting Lucas some slack” talk about accepting the bare minimum Haley kjhgkjhgkj

Brooke is really unbearable in this episode is it any wonder her, Lucas and Peyton’s relationship is as dysfunctional as it will soon become 

Hoo boy the one (1) time Nathan doesn’t do something douchey and he gets blamed for it 

LMAO @ Lucas approaching the one girl at this school with commitment issues with a bold “I wanna be here [in your heart]” hahaha

“Yeah, they can have their world,” said Lucas to Haley, about the two people they would literally go on to marry

The fact that Peyton doesn’t turn off her webcam and just covers it also really speaks to the era

This Gabe dude is really ready to assault a minor like he’s not just a r*pist he’s also a predator double KO 

It is not lost upon me that it looks like one pill has been popped out before so he is also a serial r*pist big fucking yikes

“What, you got a cellphone too, dawg? Things sure have changed” also quite dated hahahaha

They really went out of the way to redeem Brooke not only did she give Nathan and Haley a very very cute date she also saved her friend from being assaulted

“So you don’t have any brothers, do you” jhgkhgkhg Brooke please 

“Why are you only nice to me when we’re alone” a very legitimate question Haley

Nathan’s dating methodology: There’s nothing in life that can’t be solved with make-outs

Deb is really so nice but every time I look at her I think of her drinking a lot and sleeping with Nathan’s friends lmao

Haha that North Carolina sign explains the mild Southern accents 

Aieeeeeeeeeee you kiss that man and follow your dreams Karen

Even if Nathan is still A Lot this season him and Haley are so cute:

Haley, smiling: We can’t do this here right now

Nathan, giggling: We just did

Lucas says more to Dan by constantly leaving with a look of disgust than any words ever could

“My heart’s racing too. That’s what happens when I’m around you. (And on drugs. I’m very unstable Haley.)”

Lucas and Nathan’s very intentional “pressure from your dad” and “you don’t know anything about my dad” bc Lucas will not acknowledge that Senor Crabag Sr. is anything resembling a father bless 

Drunk tattoos with crush’s bff Lucas has decided to make all mistakes at once and I respect it

Poor Keith he is trying his best but Lucas just chose this week to hit his rebellious phase

YESSSSSSSSSS DEB KICK THAT ASS OUT OF THIS HOUSE

“Do you really think that Nathan would choose you over me” uh???? Are you not aware you are... the worst father in town

Brooke you were fully aware of Peyton and Lucas’s vibing and actively pursued him/interfered so you have no moral high ground to be like “:) I’d never choose a boy over my friendship”

Skillz and Mouth accurate “hoo boy don’t look” when ur friends start PDA

“Mom doesn’t want things to get back to normal, she wants them to be better” hell yeah Nathan gaining emotional intelligence

Lucas quit projecting your childhood issues onto Jake he too is a child let him decide how he wants to live Jenny’s 6 months old not like she’s gonna remember lmao

Damn Nathan LET LOOSE on Dan fuck that dude

JGFHJGFJGFJH I forgot Gavin Degraw had a cameo hahahahah

Did Luke.......... break into Jake’s house. His parents work at night how was he able to get into Jake’s coffee table

“You do not have to feel like a third wheel” The pure dumbass energy.... Peyton is literally CRYING do u really think her issue is “third wheel” you KNOW she and Lucas had a thing Brooke???????

Me watching this team form a brotherly bond over their mutual love of basketball: Mayhaps sports are... good 

Hahahaha Lucas threatening Peyton’s dad with a rake is weirdly endearing

“Hey you.” “Hey you, and you,” is a good summary of this seasons Brooke/Lucas/Peyton dynamic lmao

Why is Dan’s head... shaped that away. It is like a bar of soap

“I don’t mind you playing ‘Daddy’ to one of my offspring, but leave the good one alone, will you?” Dan. Meet me in the Denny’s parking lot at midnight and we’ll have words

“The whole Nice Guy thing is wearing kind of thin” foreshadowing for all the dick moves Lucas is about to pull lmao

“He’s got you skipping school now?” “Lucas talk to me when you get your tattoo removed”

Lucas:

Lucas is such a meddler lmao how many family dynamics is he going to alter

I don’t trust Dan being nice for a minute all he wants is the upper hand with Deb in the inevitable custody battle over Nathan

Props to Nathan and Haley for somehow, some way, being the only normal couple on this show despite their incredibly dubious origins lmao

Scott family dinners are bananas I count four (4) major revelations and they haven’t even revealed that Deb and Dan are separated

Lucas and Peyton are really hitting every fictional couple trope in this ep - road trip, bed sharing, hurt/comfort, truly the YA bases 

“The truth? In this house?” Props to Deb for drama lmao 

Brooke saying ‘I love you’ you’ve been dating for like two episodes but okay kjhgkjhg

I can’t say I understand Nathan’s logic lmao but I guess they have to bring him back to basketball sometime

Wow Lucas zero hesitation on that second kiss lmao u r a mess

This scene is the definition of “that escalated quickly” they go straight to undressing 

HAHAHAH NATHAN BEING SHIRTLESS IN HALEY’S DREAM FOR NO REASON 10/10 TEENAGE ACCURACY

“How do you explain being with me and not her?” “Because with you, I saw a future” that’s Dan code for ‘I’m a gold digger’

You’re literally macking on Peyton in the middle of the hallway while you’re dating the other most popular girl in school Lucas how are you this ridiculous and bold BREAK UP WITH BROOKE U DUMBASS

“So what are we going to do” I’ll tell you what you should do BREAK UP WITH BROOKE

Keith it is still daylight out stop bringing alcohol into this high school you have a drinking problem

“Can’t control love, you know?” THAT’S NOT ADVICE LUCAS BREAK UP WITH BROOKE

I really can’t handle watching Keith and Lucas self-destruct this episode how is Nathan the only Scott in a happy, healthy relationship

“You know that this is... wrong, so that makes it feel... deeper?” Lucas asks, as if he were not entirely in the wrong by carrying on with Peyton (who is not in a relationship) while dating Brooke

“I don’t want to hurt Brooke,” he said, about to start his third secret cheating makeout session of the week

“But then again our spouses aren’t here are they” [Deb opens door] COMEDIC TIMING

Gjjhgkjhg Nathan revealing his messed up intentions with Haley entirely by accident Scotts have no self-control whatsoever it’s their kekkei genkai

Lucas evading responsibility for his romance crimes by literally dying

Hahahah Karen’s confused vibes at Brooke are kind of the highlight of this episode 

How funny would it be if Lucas woke up to Karen scolding him about his tattoo

Hahahaha for such dysfunctional partners Nathan and Peyton are excellent exes 

AHHHHHHHHH LUCAS WAKING UP TO HIS BROTHER... MY HEART

Keith rlly was gonna propose after zero (0) days of dating I’m telling you no self-control is truly the Scott clan kekkei genkai

Ahhhh bless Karen’s compassion 

Dan is literally blackmailing his son into staying in his custody he is in Deb’s words an “abusive son of a bitch”

Fucking finally Lucas ends this sham of a relationship with Brooke

It’s wild that Nathan is the only Scott with a happy and healthy romantic relationship 

Nathan divorcing his parents is a real power move 

I’m glad Haley announced Sheryl Crow’s name because let me tell you I would not have recognized her on sight

“How’s my daughter” Lucas really chooses exclusively to hook up with people who have devastating emotional consequences for his immediate friend group huh

“Funny I didn’t know you were forgiving at all” Lmao Peyton is that really the position you’re going to take after cheating with your best friend’s boyfriend 

All the deodorant product placement lmao ‘this ep sponsored by Secret’ 

All things considered I think Lucas is handling Haley’s constant ditching p well 

Bfhkghghjg Keith buying a new shirt just to go to dinner with Karen stop

OH MY GOD THE EP REALLY WAS SPONSORED BY SECRET IT’S GOT SECRET ON THE CHEER COMPETITION BANNERS AND A LITTLE GIFT BAG RANDOMLY IN ALL THE CHEERLEADER CONFRONTATIONS JKGHKJGH

The comedic timing of “hungover idiots” panning to Karen and Larry kills me

“She used to be this totally original.... Haley” what does this mean????

I don’t think Nathan and Haley are being entirely fair to Lucas bc he was only a dick once she ditched him twice (or thrice?) in one weekend 

This boy toy auction as a concept is so inappropriate on so many levels

“I get Nathan for free” Fhjkfhkfjh Haley pls

God I was so very concerned about whether or not Nathan and Peyton were gonna kiss 

“You’re not a mess, you’re just in love” [Ole Del Paso Girl voice] Why not both?

“She’s nine months old, just in case you forgot” to be fair I assume Nikki gave birth so she would remember that you can’t hold that one over her 

It must take Lucas some mental disconnect to assume Peyton and Nathan are cheating when he also kissed Haley

Fhjfhkjfhjfh Keith fulfilling my fave trope of ‘we are not even dating but how about we get married bc we’ve been repressed in love for years’

“You know I asked your mom to get an abortion,” said Dan, to his literal son

I really can’t figure where this pregnancy storyline is going bc I know Brooke doesn’t have a baby

Nathan and Haley really need to consider oral or smth there’s a middle ground between making out and having vaginal sex

“It all hurts just the same” Brooke really out here trying to say that cheating is in any way equivalent to faking a pregnancy (even if only for a week)

Peyton and Brooke are way more invested in each other than Lucas 

“I got you a high five” Hahahhaa I love Peyton 

Gary like: Wow Nathan it’s humanizing that your father is an abusive dick

“Maybe this is the one that changed him” Lucas joining Dan as the second and only non-Dan member of the Dan Scott Apologism Club

It’s wholly unreasonable that Haley expects her boyfriend not to look at p*rn lmao

I love all this Lucas and Nathan bonding but I hate that it comes at the cost of Dan being near them at all u stay away from those boys u manipulative fuck

Ah the foreshadowing about Peyton changing in front of her webcam finally pays off

I’m no legal expert but I don’t think that taking your daughter out of state will help you in the custody battle in the long term Jake - nor will dropping out of high school

“What do I get out of it” r u 4 real Keith u dont get payment for loving your family

“I’m leaving because I can’t look at you anymore without my heart breaking” I like you Keith but that sounds like a You Problem

This is a fun way to shoot this episode One Tree Hill has such good directing tbh

Nathan discarding the Scott name from his jersey just like Lucas did in ep 2: 

Haley: Having sex will solve all of my problems Nathan what are you talking about

I remembered that at some point Deb and Keith have sex and I’m glad they fuck things up early bc I could not deal if it was later on

“I’ll miss you too, little brother” 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭

KJKGHKJHGJHKJHGKJHKJ I CAN’T BELIEVE NATHAN AND HALEY GOT MARRIED JUST TO HAVE SEX THIS IS WHY THEY DON’T LET PEOPLE YOUNGER THAN 18 VOTE

[lallemanting]

Agree with jens reaction kinda?? I mean they said homophobic comments in the past and now he acts like 'so what' kinda ooc of him lmao. And one of my problem with this remake is that they really make the ex gfs like evil when they pretty much played by their bf, especially britt. I don't know about others cause wtfock is my 1st remake lmao but in skam Emma was a fling and here they was attached to the hip with their gf almost 24/7. Emmas outing isaks is bad tho

here’s the thing - id always rather a supportive coming out scene than not, but you’re not wrong when you say that reaction from jens seemed ooc. I mean I made a post about it but the way he just replied “so?” just felt like him not understanding robbe once again, like not understanding the gravity of what just happened, not understanding what it took robbe to get to the point where he could open up about it. that and the kind of flippant disregard of robbe being confused when he’s accepting really annoyed me. like if your friend is surprised you’re okay with it when they come out to you maybe reflect a little on why that is? say what you will about yann but one of the best things skamfr did was have their jonas apologize for all the insensitive things he said, actually take a moment and understand how he messed up and how he can do better in the future and honestly that’s something jens needs to do more than any other jonas before him. so we’ll see I guess (though I don’t have a lot of faith)

as far as the ex gfs I really can’t say that s3 has ever respected women properly. the cheating storyline has always bothered me and tbh they deserve more (and honestly the fandom’s reaction to the emma but esp sonja characters is really telling about some people’s opinion on women, but that’s not something I’m gonna get into). I actually think wtfock did something right here with robbe breaking up with noor before anything too serious happened with sander bc I don’t think that’s ever happened before and it’s the right thing to do. though I think the og was actually worse with sonja bc that was a 4 year relationship was opposed to sander’s 6 month one with britt.

but yeah the emma’s outing the isaks is always very bad like could do without that but sigh (though this leads to another wtfock plot question which is how does noor even know because you want to tell me sander told britt he kissed robbe, her bff’s bf who is also her ex-bf’s bff, and she’s okay with that and welcomes him back with open arms?? like I’m sorry but I refuse to believe britt is that dumb)

[giirlgone-blog]

( cierra ramirez ; she / her ; cis-female ) livin’ in the sprawl can be interesting for sylvia moreno . the twenty-one year old is a music student living in a campus dorm when i met them , they seemed kind of creative , but also kind of adventurous . who knows what they’ll be like ?

aesthetics : pleated tennis skirts worn with leather jackets . bubblegum . coca-cola flavored lipgloss ( specifically , cherry ) . fast 3 a.m. drives with the windows down . ripped fishnets . defending pop punk . neon lights . adrenaline rushes .

what’s up , i’m bibi , i’m 21 & i never fuckin’ learned how to write good intros !

alrightalrightalright , this is my gal sylvia and she’s .... well , she tries her best

so she’s born / raised in black sheep . how depressing , right ? i know . her parents , sofía and antonio , met when they were twenty back in the ‘90s . both black sheep natives & hated it , but neither had the means to leave . so they didn’t . instead , they got married three years later in ‘93 , and a year later had their first child : a son named santiago .

when santiago was three , a new addition to the growing family was added : sylvia . born in ‘97 on january 20th ( aka the capricorn-aquarius ‘ cusp of mystery and imagination ’ ) , she was far from the perfect baby , but that didn’t stop her parents from caring any less . they were ecstatic to have a little girl .

needless to say , the baby photos are ridiculous and sylvia never wants anyone to ever see them ‘cause the fashion choices were very fuckin’ questionable !

by the time santiago was six & sylvia was three , their mother gave birth to the final moreno sibling : another boy , francisco .

this makes sylvia the dreaded middle child , but honestly the middle child trope doesn’t apply to her ?? both parents were as loving as could be for raising three children in a cramped suburban home in this shitty fuckin’ town . the family solace ended up being church , for sure . as both sofía and antonio have always been p devout roman catholics , they brought up their children in the same faith . all children have been baptized , have had communion & were confirmed .

it was a strict upbringing , no matter how warm the atmosphere was , plain & simple . this is partially why sylvia is so reckless and overly-adventurous ; she wants to experience everything she can , no matter if she gets hurt in the process . always the kid with scrapped elbows , maybe a bloody nose , and dirty bruised knees --- prompting her mother to continuously have first-aid in the house & when they went on the go ( which , wasn’t too often , but regardless . )

sofía and antonio still work at the church they frequented ( and still do frequent , work or personal reasons . it’s also the church they met in & eventually got married in ! talk ab history , huh ? ) ; francisco’s only finishing high school this year , he’s so unsure of what he wants to do . santiago , on the other hand , got out of this hell & went to fresno state / craig school of business to complete his bachelor's degree from an aacsb . he also served two extra years of professional work in that time , and is currently doing full-time mba at ucla on a scholarship .

yeah , it’s a lot to live up to when it comes to business boy santiago . ofc the moreno parents are extremely proud of their eldest & they’re lenient of their youngest ‘cause hey , not everyone knows what they want to do at such a young age .

but then there’s sylvia , middle child & only girl . and she’s always loved music , and she’s always banging on pots & pans & whatever other usable surface / object she could find around the house to drive everyone else crazy , because she didn’t realize how awful it sounded at the beginning . she remembers her first set of drums when she was ten --- wasn’t even hers , honestly . was one of her cousins , a christmas gift gone to waste because he didn’t even use it . so eventually , they decided it would be better to just let sylvia take it .

they soon enough invested into drum lessons for her around her eleventh birthday , ‘cause it’s been like a year since & they knew she wouldn’t stop drumming away whenever she could , and her love bloomed more -- much to her parents’ dismay .

although supportive of their children , sofía and antonio wish sylvia took her life & education more seriously --- “ why couldn’t you become a nurse or something... less fickle ? ” // “ you won’t get anywhere with music , mija , please think ab your future . ” // “ we just want what’s best for you . ”

which is bigger bullshit than this awful town ! 

sylvia never told them what exatly she was going to college for , all they knew is that she was going . long story short : they were v upset she “ selectively told the truth ” ( because she didn’t tell them anything , so it couldn’t’ve been lying ! )

anyway , yeah . she still plays drums and she’s gotten hella good at it . also in between , managed to take some singing lessons ( singing at church wasn’t ever enough for her , honestly . ) ; she’s rooming with jade vandermeer , & they’re bff honestly alongside sage wells & nessa belfrey !! we stan iconic girl gangs . her & jade have a lot of jam sessions .

sometimes , said jam session is at 2 a.m. etc which annoys the fuck out of the others in the building , oops !

sylvia will make multiple playlists for friends , a real spotify queen

instagram hoe af , catch her modeling & posting videos all the time

despite her passionate focus on music , when sylvia was in high school she was actually captain of the girls’ volleyball team

to this day she still considers herself to be roman catholic , however it isn’t as intense as it was growing up now that she isn’t directly under her parents’ influence anymore

here is her pinterest board !! 

a true ride or die . she would lit put herself on the line for someone important to her , no questions asked sort of thing

probably programmed her siri to call her ‘ bubblegum bitch ’ once or twice , but then undid it because it went off in public & that’s just embarrassing

defends pop punk a lot more than one might think though !!! but like , wow does she stan lana del rey lmao what a fuckin’ aesthetic icon !

uhhhhh idk what else to write ...... mayb some wc ideas :

some exes / good , bad , mutually ended , etc . ( open to m/f/nb . )

friends with benefits ? no strings attached sort of thing ! ( also open to m/f/nb . )

music friends !!!!! friends in general anyway lmfao who am i kidding

maybe sylvia babysits someone’s kid or pet for some extra cash ??? she still a college student , the grind is real .

party friends

[lorelaisgilmoresarchive-blog]

- ̗̀ ❝ where they at now !!

a list from royalty - 1 x 1 ( because i’m bored and instead of doing my homework... i want to do this. ) anyway @ me hoooes LETS PLOT

royalty:

victor gabriel bartolome ( douglas booth ) — king of spain, doting father of a perfect little girl, who’s going to be queen someday. focusing on the new world, bc LAND TO CONQUER he wants to live up to his momma tbh. currently sharing his wife with his best friend because he died that one time it’s #complicated.

elizabeth penelope adair * nee of kent * ( adelaide kane ) — princess of england, duchess of kent & many more, eternally pregnant will probably die pregnant. married and stupid in love... literally making heart eyes at her husband from across the hall her family thinks it’s disgusting. if you can’t find her she’s having sex. mother of many children and cats. currently crying about donna, being fat and yellow lemons. 

sofia fatima adair * nee de andrade * ( selena gomez ) — princess of england, duchess of whatever her husband owns lmao, eloped because she and her husband have a sense of adventure.  working on the marriage thing and dealing with the fact that hubs has *wiggles eyebrows* past. ignoring her best friend bc she married french. thinks the king of england is god, prays to him daily and she steals all the flan in order to make elizabeth cry

maximiliano de andrade ( chace crawford ) — royal duke of burgundy, right hand of the spanish king, little brother who acts like the eldest. constantly worried about his sisters and brother. he married vg’s wife once because he died. currently figuring out how the sex works #lovetriangles

gabriel de andrade ( gregg sulkin ) — royal duke of ( what duchy was anne’s? lmfao ), married to the eternal bane of his existence he calls her hades for short. some people call her a princess but he thinks that’s a lie. they fight 24/7 but they are also in love 24/7. he built her a castle because they are little dicks that want to be alone, don’t try to find them they are always on vacation. annoyed at his family, and currently making friends in france, ( only one who went to annie’s wedding tbh. ) while working on the having kids thing.

beatriz de andrade ( maia mitchell ) — royal duchess of burgundy, no one knows she exists tbh. in fact she’s a myth because she’s always inside and her face is always hiding behind a book. does she talk? does she eat? nobody knows. 

dimitri fontaine iv ( bradley james ) — the vegan king of france, grew up a bastard until his father married his mom and legitimized him. not prepared to be king, noblest heart and he’s trying his best. loves his sisters more than life, ( he’s the face, they the brains tbh. ) newly wed and he still can’t believe it. completely devoted to his wife, it’s why france only eats meat when guest come to court. working on his country’s image and trying to open doors in other countries. also it’s france, let them eat cake!

gabrielle fontaine ( sophie turner ) — princess of france & duchess of bourbon, cooky inventor and military genius all she aspires in life is to lead an army. proficient in weaponry and other things v. educated, will stare down generals just about every day of the week. extremely proud of france and her siblings ( they are her life ) not entirely happy with the idea of outsiders even if she knows it’s necessary. currently refusing to accept any marriage proposals because she’s an independent princess who needs no man. ( rich can call her tho ) 

fairwood:

alexandra sophia ford ( dove cameron ) — jason ford’s favorite little sister ( she the only one, but she uses the title anyway ) literally pulled out of a disney fairy-tale with a prince to match. she’s v. in love ( first loves and all that ) experiencing the magic of sex before marriage for the first time while trying that whole long distance thing because she attends college at yale. her niece and nephew are the most important, she has bought out every toy store on the east coast.  currently ignoring her parents and student responsibilities bc english dick.

riley daphne moore ( katie stevens ) — crazy cupcake lady and momma bear. she’s all about protecting the kiddos, and will more often than not attempt to feed them cupcakes. owner of queen of tarts and in love with the grumpy diner owner... who’s heart she broke because she’s leaving. bakery in the works of becoming a franchise, but she’s currently v. sad. so it’s been closed and people think she died. 

gemma allegra ford * nee rhodes * ( amber heard ) — boss lady. ready to rule the world, a queen of an empire and a wife. she fell in love with her husband without wanting to so she’s in a constant state of discovering emotions. ( tbh she wants a refund, she hella lost lmao. ) don’t breathe near her kit, she’ll eat you. that girl is the other half of the heart she didn’t even know she had. dealing with the school teacher’s ever annoying presence and coming to terms with the fact that she might have to share her husband for the rest of her life. oh + she’s plotting to kill the village idiot on a now regular basis... &. yes she means finn. 

finnley gray ( richard madden ) — resident village idiot, ex trust fund brat who gave it up bc he has a passion for literature and teaching. a best selling author he’s still rich but like not at his family’s level ya feel? the best best friend you’ll ever have, just ask his. neurotic, don’t look at the mini me’s bc he’ll eat you. currently sexing it up with his ex fiance... the lady at the bar while in love with a brunette at least he thinks he is. man whore who won’t ever change or will he? dunno don’t ask me... he should be in jail he’s mr. fitz

athena margaret pearce ( carlson young ) — ex wild child who is now in a committed relationship with her best friend. thea’s had a dramatic year, you know going from slutting it up with everything that moves to falling in love with the one person she’s known her entire life. people can’t believe that it’s her tbh. basically she’s v. gay for her bff... + don’t breathe in cassie’s direction because she’ll STILL eat you.

james cunningham ( grant gustin ) — still summer’s life partner, ubber nerd. he got into all the ivy leagues but he decided on MIT. he’s best friends with satan, and he still does her homework so he’s basically double majoring. never got his bike back from fish and he’s still mad about it lmao. oh and he still don’t know what flirting is. 

tree hill:

natalie evans ( virginia gardner ) — jailbait, sixteen... and completely and totally her father’s twin. that’s the reason clay won’t forget her. pain in the ass to her eldest brother, secretly into music. trying to be a touch bitch but she really just want to sign the toaster strudel song. she shares everything with sawyer, from food to boys.. they’ll share the clap one day and call it boding. currently still crushing on chris k jr... but he refuses to take her seriously. he still her boing thoo.

james lucas scott ( luke mitchell ) — golden boy, future NBA star like his daddy. momma’s boy, going to school and shooting hoops that’s his life. he does what he’s supposed to when he’s supposed to because that’s what’s expected of him. he’s gotta learn to live a little and he really needs to put on his big boy pants and ask madison out again. fighting his little sister 24/7 because she drives him insane and a man can only take so much.

andrew chase adams ( matthew daddario ) — hates everyone and everything... broods 24/7. only reason he ever goes anywhere is to keep an eye on his little sister. 

davis baker ( daniel sharman ) — the smart baker, total nerd... collects action figures and is totally into the superhero thing. loves his cousin sawyer like a sister... and has a crush on laney but he’s afraid to talk to her so he hides from her. she thinks he hates her, but he just don’t know how to talk to a girl.

dionne taylor ( candice patton ) — girl genius, 1000% woke, she’s cultured bc she has a mixed family she knows how white people live too. no one ever knows what she’s talking about except her brother bc they are basically both jimmy neutron. 

ayto: 

bailey anderson ( adelaide kane ) — resident southern nut job, a man eater at least that’s her label but tbh it’s more like a people eater bc she’s gonna steal someone’s girl. fun and adventurous, basically an alcoholic with loads and loads of intimacy issues. she wants to win the million dollars

fitzgerald ‘ fitz ‘ matthews ( matthew daddario ) — friendzoned, doesn’t know how to tell a girl he likes, that he likes her so it’s just so ???? needs someone to set him straight and he needs to find love.. he don’t cur about the 1 mil.

suburbs:

lena harris ( zoey deutch ) — her ex came to pick up their daughter... they had mind blowing sex and tbh that’s STILL what they are doing. she lives and breathes for her daughter tho... basically everyone knows that she and aaron are still in love with each other except thai lmao.

william preston collier ii ( joshua bowman ) — ceo, is cleaning up his dad’s mess of a company. christian vasquez’s business partner... and in love with lissa. did he leave lily yet? is he going to? idK where we at here. 

holly rose fisher ( danielle campbell ) — still throwing phones at christian’s head. the ER knows them by first name by now.

oliver paige ( aaron taylor johnson ) — marrying and divorcing bobbi... if he married he’s the happiest in the world and totally in love. if he divorced he’ll be telling ‘ how i found out my wife was satan stories ‘ to anyone who is willing to listen. rich af, spending his trust fund and hasn’t worked a day in his life bc #lazy

charlotte vasquez * nee moore * ( ashley benson ) — married mr. vasquez, she is christian’s step mom. a lady of leisure.. spending her millions and looking fab while doing it.

forties:

alexandra frederick * nee garroway * ( danielle campbell ) — 1/2 of the bitter squirt squad. was married to a fat head and they had a daughter who is three years old. her name is alison vivianne frederick ( sabrina carpenter fc. ) bobby died a year ago, she’s still angry about it and tbh avoids talking about hubs because she’s pissed as f at him for dying. his hero flag? it’s rotting away in her closet and she might burn it at some point bc she’s insane. still has 10 dogs, lives with ruby now... and rubes is the only person she talks to... you know outside of her brother ( cause she can’t make nathan scared of her... she tried tho )

theodore ‘ teddy ‘ gallagher ( nathaniel buzolic ) — went back to the air-force after you know that whole we blew up a house  fiasco... so he got his wings back... did more things for his country and he’s had enough of war to last him a life time so when he was given the chance to leave he did. he got real involved with helping soldiers with ptsd and he runs a center for it now. idiot is in love with juliette, told her on new years she said thank you and now he’s just like ???? still sticks around tho bc like that’s his crazy ya feel?

roxanne luz * nee wade * ( amber heard ) — cougar, met the love of her life at a bar... went on a few dates and then married her man in a foreign country... not even sure it’s legal but whatvs. they had a kid... his name is bacon. bat shit crazy, while being a hippie is a new concept and she’s working on it. always traveling the world and seeing exotic places. sends everyone post cards. only comes back to see her spice... aka juliette bc crazy bitches gotta tough it out together. 

panthers: 

lyra hahaway ( lily collins ) — at yale, no longer the virgin mary... because she and the bf did the sex. she had a blast, doesn’t remember what purity means. still the blakes #1 fan. visits texas to see them all the time, and is the best god mother anyone will ever meet. oh and she stalked jeremy from a bush once she’s not allowed to hang out with tizi because of it.

samuel calhoun ( grant gustin ) — moved to california, is at UCLA...still getting knives and anything that’s dangerous thrown his way. dating laura bc he has a death wish, and he’s working while getting his degree and taking care of his younger siblings bc their mom is in a psychiatric wing 

ophelia ferro ( nina dobrev ) — FBI, she and cj haven’t seen each other in years bc he’s now wanted ( idk that was the plot. ) still hates dillon... matty still mad at her about the drake joke. she’s in a committed relationship with her gun. 

southern: 

amelia nichols ( lily james ) — gave a cowboy a lap dance, then had sex in his car... gave him another lap dance on new years eve and almost killed him bc of it. her dad wants her to go back to the city so she can keep working on her brilliant medical career, but her crush on said cowboy won’t let her.

gale hawthorne ( richard madden ) — modern southern hero who needs no princess, except he does in love with shawn but won’t tell her bc she has her real prince charming. ( can’t even hate him bc he’s too good ) had a chicken named gabent and it died.. he and bentley had a funeral for it and the entire town came.

edward nichols ( max irons ) — still has no idea that his wife? is it wife? wife to be? point is he still don’t know that she was married once before or who gale is. loves his twin sister mia and is basically in town bc shawn is there. also he’s that annoyingly nice guy in all the movies that you just can’t hate bc he’s too good.

1 x 1: aka the jess verse basically

dr. josephine blake ( karen gillan ) || v.crime — forensic anthropologist, woman genius... digging up bones and eternally taking out her sexual frustration by fighting her partner 24/7. she owns a v. big gun

dr. riley scott ( nina dobrev ) || v. hospital — emotional mess, doesn’t know how to do relationships but she wanted to... and then she kissed the love of her life on new years and his wife showed up. she’s currently bitter and mad at the world. oh and she pretends not to care about her kid sister but she’ll eat you if you look at her.

caitlin sullivan ( adelaide kane ) || v. pride and prejudice — grad student with a youtube channel dedicated to hating carter. 

daniela echavarria ( selena gomez ) || v. hollywood — married to the love of her life, is v. happy for now.

name to be decided ( matthew daddario ) || v. star wars — basically gonna be male leia... i will pick a name someday LMFAO.

[restless-rainfall]

first semester of junior year

okay while i’m here i might as well do my class rundown for this semester lol. i usually try to do them at the end of the first week and at this point i only have three weeks left of these classes but why not do it anyways lol i like documenting stuff.

advanced drama- okay so last year my friend convinced me to sign up for tech in this class with her but then she dropped it because the director called her stupid so it was just me for a while. it was a bit awkward because the class is meant for actors and i was the only kid there for exclusively tech. i knew a couple people, and i would kind of sit near them but they all had other friends so it was rough. about a week in, my friend dropped the class that she had this period, so i convinced her to join the class with me. that definitely saved me, because i can’t imagine doing the stuff that we do in that class alone. i’m confused most of the time so it really helps to have her around lol. we did tech for a show at the beginning of the year, but at this point it’s basically student aide work. i feel like it’s probably good experience for future jobs. the class is usually my fun period because most of the time my friend and i are given separate tasks from the rest of the class. we also do some stuff with the stage manager, which is fun because she’s kind of like a mentor to us now. there’s a famous actor in this class which is kind of weird ngl lmao.

ap language- THIS CLASS MAKES ME WANT TO DIE OMG. the teacher is highkey crazy and the workload is insane. if i have to annotate one more article i might have a stroke. the class relies heavily on timed essay writing, which is not good because that’s definitely my weakness. i probably won’t do very well on the ap exam. to make matters worse, the other ap lang teacher (whom i had for american lit last year) is super chill, and the class is pretty much an easy a for his students. for some reason my teacher likes me, which is good lol. in august she named me the student of the month and then just,,, didn’t do it again for the rest of the semester so i guess that makes me student of the semester lmao. in the beginning of the year i sat with one good friend, two sort-of friends, and my good friend’s friend whom i did not know. less than a month into school, my good friend moved, which really sucked, but it made the rest of us a lot closer. also i have a crush on one of them now whoops. they’re all a lot of fun and somehow keep me laughing despite my ever building anxiety.

acc precalc- this class has been unexpectedly easy. i was kind of stressed before it started, but i have pretty much breezed through everything. sometimes i get a bit stuck, but it always turns out alright. i had the teacher freshman year for geometry, and she’s nice. there’s really no way to make math exciting lol. she gives a little bit of homework every night, but it’s never too much and i feel like it’s necessary to learn the content. i have a group of five in this class, which consists of me, a friend i met in algebra II last year, someone i hung out with in middle school sometimes, a girl who has always gone to school with me but we never talked a ton, and my best friend’s ex-bff. that last one is a bit awkward but we just like,,, ignore it. it seems like we both understand that we’ll never hang out outside of this class lol. anyways, acc precalc is overall pleasant.

honors us history- oh boy what a ride. the original teacher was one of my favorite teachers at the school. i had her for preap human geography freshman year and she’s SO GOOD omg. unfortunately, she was pregnant so she was only there for about a month. a supply teacher took over, and she was alright. she knew what she was doing and she was nice, but it’s hard to compare to the original. BUT THEN she got a full time job somewhere else so she left and we got ANOTHER supply teacher. this woman is nice and all but sometimes i feel like i know more than she does yikes. also, it’s never fun to learn history from a republican. i’m surviving, but i feel like i haven’t learned much this semester so hopefully the eoc won’t kill my grade. i have a nice corner of friends in this class. two of my best friends and three other pals lol. my crush is also in this class and he sits kind of close but we don’t interact a ton. the actual teacher of the class comes back in about a week and i’m soooo excited to see her again omg.

[lu-luna17-blog]

1. Four years ago, I was 11.

2. She was my neighbor, and one of my best friends. My older cousin was teaching me about LGBT community at the time (bc I had no idea of anything about it) and then it just came to my mind like a mailman sliding a mail card into my brain "you like her, you like girls" and I was like "oh, ok".

3. Nope.

4. Yas:(

5. I love her so much, she's my only close (girl) friend, the rest of them were fake, bad persons or just stopped talking to me one day for no reason, but she's the only one that always have stayed since I met her. She loves me a lot and we had "something" but it didn't work very well because of the distance. I'm waiting for the day we move to the same city and can see each other. She's so smart, beautiful, sensitive, she worries a lot about me and always listen to ALL of my stupid problems, she has such a really really cute voice that makes me smile every time I hear it, and she has like this attitude and image of bad girl, but inside she's like a baby pink Teddy bear filled with love, and the cutest thing it's that I'm almost the only one who knows that side of her.

6. Femenine, and androgynous a little bit.

7. So femenine.

8. It's hard for my gaydar to activate, but sometimes it's just OBVIOUS and it makes ping. It works more easily in gay men.

9. Tall. 😍😍

10. Both, but I like more the intimidating girls, I think it's such a sexy attitude.

11. You can't make me pick. I choose both.

12. Physically I like brunette girls, long hair, white skin, taller than me, and femenine/androgynous style. Mentally, to like me, a girl has to be cultured, secure about herself, good sense of humor and I like sassy girls, like those who aren't afraid of saying what their think but also can turn you on without shyness.

13. Idk lol, maybe that I'm creative.

14. Already said it. ☝☝

15. EvERyTHinG. I can't imagine a straight life.

16. A lot. My 2 ex's and the ex of one of them(?), the girls who like me, my Bff's in my classroom (I know the first girl since 10 years ago, and the other one 4 years ago, and they were Bff's and now they're a couple AAAAHH I ship them so hard), my ex-friends, my crush... My world it's a gay antro LMAO.

17. No:(

18. Sure, why not.

19. It was so magical and cute. I was almost 13 and my crush was 14. We were in an abandoned park (with these like playground for kids but completely dismantled) so we sat there, looked at each other, and she told me "if I do something, you wont tell anyone?" And I was like "Of course I wont... *I WILL BUT OMG SHUT UP AND KISS ME I'VE BEEN WAITING 4 MONTHS*" and she kissed me, and we smiled in the middle of the kiss, and then she hugged me. It was really cute. But it's sad now bc that girl was so important to me and today we don't talk anymore, she hurt me so much.

20. 1 word: CAMREN. But when I was little I thought Gabriella from High School Musical was so pretty, that was the very start.

21. Idk I've been watching series but haven't seen a movie before *pls don't kill me*

22. Maybe Lauren Jauregui. Idk if YouTubers count but I'm in love with Calle & Poché and Dulceida.

23. Sometimes. I love it but I don't know almost anything about makeup.

24. My cousin and my first girl crush (huge mistake with my crush).

25. Omg, a bunch of friends, and also my cousin, he's like my older brother.

26. I think so(?) I have a lot of LGBT friends in real life, and on internet it's like a gaytransqueerwe'reallweirdwohoo party.

27. Idk 😵 the YouTubers I mentioned.

28. I don't like labels, but I identify as a femme.

29. Would say Camren BUT CAMREN IS REAL, so Rilaya (girl meets world).

30. Going to pride, be in a relationship, getting married, moving with that person and having A LOT OF PETS (they're gonna be our children). And maybe in a future I will adopt or try to get pregnant by insemination, but NO BABIES 4 A WHILE, THANKS.

soft wlw asks

1. how long have you known you liked girls?

2. talk about the girl who made you realise you liked girls

3. are you in a relationship at the moment?

4. do you have a crush at the moment?

5. describe your crush!

6. do you tend to like more masculine, feminine, or androgynous girls?

7. do you look/dress more masculine, feminine, or androgynous?

8. what’s your gaydar like?

9. tall girls or short girls?

10. intimidating girls or kind girls?

11. hugs or kisses?

12. do you have an ideal ‘type’? what would they be like?

13. what’s your favourite personality trait of yours?

14. what’s your favourite personality trait for a girl to have?

15. what’s the best thing about liking girls?

16. do you have any friends who are wlw?

17. have you ever been to pride? if so, what was your first pride like?

18. do you like the lesbian flag?

19. what was your first kiss with a girl like?

20. who was your celebrity/fictional gay awakening?

21. what’s your favourite lgbt+ movie?

22. who’s your favourite openly wlw celebrity?

23. do you wear makeup?

24. who was the first person you came out to (if you have)?

25. has anyone ever come out to you?

26. have you found a community of lgbt+ people?

27. do you have any older lgbt+ people you look up to?

28. do you identify with butch/femme labels?

29. who’s your favourite fictional wlw?

30. what experiences are you looking forward to having in the future (kissing a girl, going to pride, etc)?

[fuckinnproblems]

1-150 if ur not a pu$$y

1. Do you bite or lick ice cream? •lick def2. What is home to you? •home is a lot of things to me. Home can sometimes be my actual house. Home is my family in KY and the little house my nana lives in and the farm my grandpa own. Home is Bowling Green , which is connected to the same family. Home is the softball field I grew up on. Home is hunter’s arms. Etc. 3. What was the last lie you told? •idk I don’t lie?? But i think I did tell someone I would call him back and I had no intentions of doing so lmao 4. Does everyone deserve the truth? •woah tf …. uh. I’d say so yes. Yes. 5. What is the creepiest toy ever made? •those fuckin dolls like idk what they’re called but good god 6. Describe a moment in which you did something unacceptable in a bad situation. •oh good heavens. My mind is really going to this one time when I accidentally dined and dashed but idk if that’s what this question is asking. 7. List two things that are more easily done than said. (No, I didn’t mix them up.) •giving directions, like I would much rather show you where than try to tell you. And idk I think it’s easier to show someone how much you care for them instead of just trying to find the right words (in most scenarios)8. When was the last time you worked really hard to achieve something? •few months ago 9. How many all nighters have you pulled? •not a ton tbh I’m weak 10. If humans didn’t evolve to laugh or smile, how would we express our happiness instead? •with our hands11. How many romantic “things” or “flings” have you had? •wtf does this mean um well as far as girls go,l I’ve had 3, including hunter right now. Guys… lmao …. let’s just say 3-4 roughly lmao. 12. What is your paradise? •a gorgeous beach with bright blue water with sailboats and white soft sand 13. What is your favorite background noise? (Ex. Water dripping, people talking.) •I personally love piano music in the background tbh OR waves crashing 14. How many hearts do you think you have broken? •well I don’t make it my goal to have a running count of broken hearts , I want to say 1, maybe 2 , let’s say 1.515. What is the most important thing about electronics? What does this say about you? •I think electronics are an amazing way to keep in touch with not only your close friends and family, but the world and it can allow you to educate yourself and learn things. I guess this suggests I’m a pretty progressive person lol and I’m all about learning. 16. Why do people care about celebrities? Do you care about celebrities? •People care about celebrities because everyone likes to have someone to “idolize” or to “mimic.” I don’t care about them on this level because they’re just people, but if there are celebrities doing really good things with their “power” then I’m here for that And if they’re acting ridiculous then sometimes I gotta catch up on the beef. 😌😌😌17. What is the most annoying thing someone can do to you?•sit there and crunch on some food and chew obnoxiously 18. Do you overexaggerate? What are the pros and cons of this? •oh yes all the time, I’ve gotten bad at it but you can always tell I’m joking so I mean I never do it to cause harm. 19. Have you played any instruments before? Which instruments? •yesss clarinet 3rd chair wooooooo & I had a brief date with the piano 20. Do you like taking selfies? Why or why not? •uh well sometimes I do and then other times I hate it because when I decide I wanna take them it’s usually Bc I feel like I’m lookin good and then I take a selfie and I’m like AHH WHAY A MONSTER21. List 3 things you like about yourself? •my eyes, my smile , my arms22. What is the best advice someone has ever given you? •I have received a lot of amazing advice over the years honestly, like I could @ a lot of people right now and I’m truly blessed to have had that and on so many different aspects. It really depends! But honestly the most recent advice was just generally how to not let people walk all over me (although it was said much prettier)23. Do you have what it takes to raise a child? Why or why not? •well not now but I like to think I will eventually. 24. How do you cheer yourself up after a bad day? •who said I cheer myself up 👀👀 nah jk, a lot of the times if I’ve had a bad day I treat myself to some Starbucks 25. When was the last time you felt awkward? •like an hour ago . Basically 24/726. Are you introverted or extroverted? Or a mixture of both? •introvert all the way. Like literally took a test in psych and I got a perfect 10 in introvert and not a single point in extrovert. 27. What constitutes a good friend? •this is tricky. There are different levels of friend!!! Lmao. Honestly a GOOD FRIEND will support you and never try to change who you truly are. Like above all. 28. Would you rather have a lot of friends to hang out with or just one best friend? •one bff29. In a regular day, what do you not want to hear? •Idk what this means like I’m taking that three different ways 30. What is your dream job? •right now an orthopedic PA 31. Is it better to be lazy but smart or hardworking but unintelligent? •hardworking 32. What is a truth about yourself that others find hard to believe? •33. What have you always wondered about the other gender? •LMAO many things but honestly how you ride a bike with a dick34. Which fantasy world would you like to visit the most? •I don’t do fantasy N/A35. Describe the worst friend you have ever befriended. •IVE HAD SO MANY WINNERS. Honestly the cake goes to the most recent someone that was my close friend for an entire summer, learned me, talked about serious stuff with me, cared, etc and then suddenly dropped me and then talked shit and then told lies and then told people I was gay and her reasoning for why she thought I was gay (when she had literally made me feel so safe months before) and the reason was an extremely personal story. :) but honestly there’s another one that prob beats her but I just can’t even rn. 36. Imagine that you have switched bodies with someone you don’t know. You can’t switch back. What do you do? •make the most of it I guess idk 37. If you found the recipe for immortality, would you sell it or would you burn it? •I have mixed feelings on this because I’ve always wanted to live forever while at the same time I think that would be miserable so 38. What is the most important, applicable class you have ever taken? •I took a finances class it was good 39. Name the last book you read. • I think “love anthony”40. Imagine that you are unable to express emotion. How would this affect your world? •it would suck not being able to show people I was happy to be with them and it would suck being trapped in my own mind 41. When was the last time you made the first move? • @ hunter have I ever 42. What is your opinion on electronic music such as dubstep or trap? •I’ve listened to both. I don’t shut down either. But I’m not some big fan. 43. What was the last movie you watched? • I watched a documentary the other day about the NCAA I can’t remember what it was called 44. Do you like and appreciate your life? •rn I do like my life and I appreciate life in general 45. Do you like and appreciate yourself? •I suppose. 46. When was the last time you cried? • 4 or 5 days ago I think 47. What are you scared of? •death, heights, spiders etc 48. What is the most embarrassing, cringe-worthy thing you have ever done? •there is so many tbh but the one in mind rn is when I walked right by this sweet sweet Spanish teacher as a senior and she said “hola, coma Estas?” And I looked at her…. smiled…. and walked right by her. KMS on that one 49. What are some of your hobbies? •photography is my biggest tbh 50. What is a superficial yet annoying mistake you constantly make? •I don’t know but I’m sure it’s something 51. Are you a good friend? What makes you a good friend? If not, what makes you a bad friend? •I think I’m pretty good I’m pretty chill I give lots of chances I give advice etc 52. Do you honestly learn from your mistakes? •some better than others but at some point yes 53. What have you learned the hard way? •not to stay with people that are bad for you just because you think you owe it to them 54. What is the most important thing to have in order to attain happiness? •respect for yourself 55. Which medium do you use for expressing your artistic emotions? (Singing, writing, etc.) •writing or photography 56. Are you a creative or a logical thinker? •I feel like logical 57. What is the smartest thing you have ever done? •I don’t know lol58. What is your ideal meal? •pasta is always a go to but idc I’m not picky 59. What is the worst thing someone could do on a date? •not speak or be interesting 60. Do you like animals? Which kind is your favorite? •love them. Love tigers a lot and sting rays 61. If you could turn one legal thing illegal, what would it be? •62. Do you have any guilty pleasures? •yes 63. What is the best thing that the internet has ever created? •the ability to search for wonderful tutorials 64. Do you like playing video games? Which video games? •yes imma fuq u up on Mario kart 65. What is your opinion on beauty in today’s society? •it’s twisted and fucked up and honestly fuck society 66. Are you a morning person? When do you usually wake up? •no and between 930-10 usually 67. Do you have a favorite Disney movie? Character? •I love me some finding dory or finding nemo 68. Would you rather live in the city or in the countryside? •I go back and forth on this one. 69. Would you rather live near the ocean or in the mountains? •ocean 70. What are the best things about winter? •getting to wear hoodies !!! 71. What scares you most about the future? •inadequacy 72. What makes you feel old? •little kids I played with as a kid that are suddenly about to enter high school , movies I loved as a kid 73. How many hours do you spend on the computer or phone on average? •eh i dunno. I check my phone all day but I don’t really sit downnnnn on it but a few times a day74. What are some of your New Year’s resolutions? •to better myself, workout gains, and as always , grow 75. What is your life story in 6 words? “Struggle, fight and the come up 76. Describe yourself in one word. •shy77. What bad habits do you do? •bite on pens, pick nails, etc 78. What genre of music do you listen to? •literally everything except country tbh 79. Most prominent childhood memory?rn my head is going to rolling acorns down my grandpas steep driveway idk why 80. Imagine if you had an older brother. If you already have one, what is it like? If you don’t, how would this change your life? •I feel like it would change how I didnsports and how I interacted with people 81. Spirit animal? •tiger or panda 82. Do you believe in horoscopes? •eh whatever they’re fun 83. What is the worst advice you’ve ever been given? •once you’re not s teenager, this will all get better”84. List the 3 most important people in your life right now. •hunter, kayla, Avery/alex85. Favorite memory of your family. •too many to choose rn 86. What do you look for in a relationship? •not controlling behavior lmao 87. Do you have a role model? Why or why not? •i do and mostly because of the time I was going trough and how they were for me 88. What is your opinion on social media? •it can be super good it can be super bad 89. Are you a pessimist or an optimist? •eh sometimes both 90. List some things that you think are overpriced? •feminine hygiene products tf, bottled water, real necessities 91. What is your worst memory or creepiest experience? •I’d rather not 92. What superpower would ruin the world? •WTF IDK PROB INVISIBILITY 93. What is something you swore you would never do when you grew up, but you did anyway? •I swore I’d never ever even date in high school but I totally did 94. What lessons have you learned from movies and which movies were they? •idk the movies but really just to not ever give up 95. If you could travel anywhere, where would you go? •I wanna do lots of traveling so anywhere 96. How do you approach people? •I let them approach me :)))) or I do it prob awkwardly 97. What is your opinion on first impressions? •they can be impactful even falsely, and I’m awful at them 98. What are some things you did as a child that you no longer do? •I used to collect those pressed pennies 99. What languages can you speak? •English barely 100. What do you think society will be like in 30 years? •at this rate a fuckin DISASTER 101. What do you do on your lazy days? •I spend time outside or I read 102. What ended your last relationship? •extreme jealousy and controlling abusive behavior 103. Favorite food? •idek im not picky I love pasta 104. What is the most terrifying dream you’ve ever had? •school shootings 105. When was the last time you got seriously angry? •few months ago. Prob either February or April. 106. What was the last friendship you broke? •few months ago also 107. Do you have any pet peeves? •TONS108. Who was the last person you gave a hug to? •coach terry109. When was the last time you got seriously stressed? •today 110. What part of your personality do you want to change? •how forgiving it tends to be 111. Who is the most positively influential person in your life right now? •hunter tbh like she stays giving me fire advice and helping me out and is my best friend 112. What is your biggest motivation? •those who doubt me 113. What did you want to be when you were little? •this is funny but I went from wanting to be a “baby doctor” (basically OB/GYN) to the flag waver at NASCAR races (I don’t even watch NASCAR) 114. What are some things that you are good at? •I’m good at sporty things usually, photography I think, etc 115. What is one thing you want to be good at? •piano 116. What distracts you the most, especially when you’re trying to work? •noise 117. How important is privacy to you?•I like privacy tbh so I guess fairly important but in the right times 118. If you could create one social norm, what would it be? •acceptance 119. What’s the craziest lie you’ve ever told? •I used to be a cheerleader 120. What story do you like to tell about yourself at parties? •nothing ?? Idk121. What is the lamest thing that you have seen someone do? • idk I see some dumbass shit on insta daily 122. What is the stupidest thing you’ve done to impress someone? •pretended I was into things I wasn’t 123. What is your morning routine? •I wake up and eventually go in the bathroom and brush my teeth and wash my face and pee 124. What’s the last thing you did that is worth remembering? •last night w hunter 125. If karma was coming back to you, would it help or hurt you? •I’m sure hurt me idk 126. What is your opinion on playing “hard to get?” •tf even stop it 127. What are the pros and cons of straightforward? •it can be good because you know straight off the bar but it can also mess with people who have been thru stuff or are quiet or unsure and it could spook them 128. What do you consider “leading” someone on? •letting someone believe they have a chance when really they don’t 129. Are you the friendzoner or the friendzoned? •friendzoner130. What do you admire most about your friends? •their passion for their interests 131. What do you admire most about your family? •their humor 132. What is your opinion on “going with the flow?” •it’s a great concept how do you do it 133. Do you enjoy talking or listening? •listening 10/10134. When is it time to end a friendship? •when it is no longer benefiting you and making you question yourself 135. What is the worst excuse you’ve ever come up with? •my phone was just on the fritz tbh 136. If GPA didn’t matter, what courses would you have taken? •some AP history 137. What are your favorite baby names? •I love girls with “boy” names, so like Carter or something. I also love the game Jay or Alex or 138. When was the last time you had a deep conversation with someone? •today kinda 139. What instantly ruins a conversation? •no longer conversations but TELLUNG 140. Biggest turn ons and turn on offs. •check the anon tag tbh. Turn on: lip biting , apparently aggressiveness and teasing and hair pulling etc Turn offs: bad breath, weird talking 141. Biggest disappointment. •shit myMom did 142. Do you have any self-restraint? •yes143. When did you last do something outside of your comfort zone? •it’s been a while 144. Prized possession(s)? •idk that I have one tbh. 145. What is your opinion on second chances? •well I seem to give them out like candy so . But nah they can be worth it for sure 146. Text or call? •text unless you’re hunter then I don’t mind a good call 147. What do you like about the 21st century? •technological advancements 148. What advice would you give to yourself 5 years ago? •this sucks and I know you don’t like a whole bunch right now but this seriously will get better and you don’t have to believe everything you hear and you can learn to love yourself and you don’t need to let people manipulate you. 149. How organized are you? •very150. Favorite mode of transportation. •car for the naps but don’t mind planes these days