#more crying over how much i had to compress the gifs (especially the last one) but i'm fine it's fine :')

[teenidlegirl]

⠀⠀౨౿  ׅ ۟   ֪ 𝓑eauty 𝓞f 𝓣his 𝓜ess⠀♡⠀𝓒hapter 𝓔ighteen ۪ ׂ   𓈒 ୭

꒰⠀⠀⟡⠀.⠀military!miguel⠀𝓍⠀fem!neighbor!reader⠀.⠀⟡⠀⠀꒱

⠀ ᰦ 󠄀 ྀ .⠀♥︎⠀summary.⠀you and miguel finally have your big conversation. he finally gets the chance to explain himself, you learn a heartbreaking truth, and figure out where to go next.

⠀ ᰦ 󠄀 ྀ .⠀♥︎⠀content.⠀fluff, angst, pregnancy, background stories, past character death, past violence, flashbacks, mentions of blood, trauma, emotional distress, sorta hurt/comfort

❛⠀ previous chapter⠀⋅⠀masterlist⠀⋅⠀next chapter ⠀❜

the smell of pancakes awakes you, filling up your senses. slowly opening your eyes, your remember everything from yesterday. after the stupid fight between joel and miguel, you took miguel back home to patch him up and demanded that he should stay the night. he obeyed like a puppy, no matter how many times he rejected the offer. you also realize this is the first time miguel has been in your home in two months. the last time he was here, miguel walked out and disappeared for three weeks. now, he’s back and making breakfast in your kitchen.

you snap out of thought when a white fluff ball walks towards your face. the sight makes you smile as luna greets you with happy licks and a wagging tail. after saying good morning to your dog, you get up from bed and put on a cardigan over your nightgown to shield you from the chilly morning air. sipping on your fuzzy slippers and scooping luna in your arms, you head to the kitchen and find miguel cooking. his broad back faced to you. that navy blue compression shirt hugs his muscles so perfectly. the way his back muscles ripple as he maneuvers around the kitchen.

goddamn that is a sight you miss so much. to see him again, in the flesh, especially in your home. just a cute domestic scene of the man you still love. you really miss miguel so much it hurts.

but the pain that he inflicted on you hurts still. although you’re happy to see him and have him in here after a long time, that doesn’t erase the heartbreak miguel left behind when he left you alone to deal with a life-changing situation for three weeks. those were the shittiest three weeks of your life. three weeks of crying. three weeks of pain. miguel caused that, the very same man cooking breakfast in your kitchen at this moment. now that he’s here, you have to know where the fuck he was during those three weeks. it’s the question that never left your mind.

as he serves a plate meant for you, miguel turns around not expected to see you there standing at the opposite side of the kitchen island. “oh buenas dias, amor. i was gonna take this to you so you wouldn’t have to get out of bed.” he offers a sheepish grin.

there goes your heart fluttering because of his kindness, against your opposing thoughts. “the smell of pancakes woke me up, i had to get out of bed.”

your joke makes him chuckle lightly. “you still should get back in bed, i’ll bring this to you.”

“no, it’s okay. i need to wash my sheets anyways. now gimme those pancakes, pretty please.” you hop on one of the barstools with much glee.

miguel couldn’t resist the cute smile of yours, a sight that he misses so dearly.

you enjoy your pancakes while miguel cleans up the kitchen. damn, those pancakes are delicious. you forgot how much you miss his cooking. you remember how great of a cook he is but damn do you miss eating the food he made. resurfaced memories of the mornings and evenings miguel would cook, either at your place or his, when you were dating. chitchatting and sometimes goofing around while cooking delicious meals. his food always hit the spot, even simple as pancakes.

moving on to a much more serious topic, you wanted to know of his condition and if anything improved overnight. the memories of those awful bruises still makes your heart squeeze painfully.

“how are you feeling?”

“a bit better but some places still hurts like shit but i’ll be fine. that asshole didn’t do that much damage.” he rubs the back of his neck with a hand.

“still, he hurt you enough.”

miguel notices the concern laced in your tone, his heart swells. “i’ll be okay, mi amor. i promise.” he leans a bit over the island to find your eyes, reassuring you that he will be fine.

your concerned eyes meet his serious yet reassuring eyes. you know he will be fine but you can’t not be still concerned about his health. no matter the circumstances, your heart still beats and aches for him. you simply offer a small smile then continue focusing on your breakfast.

miguel lets you eat in peace as he cleans up the kitchen, washing and putting away dishes. once he finished, he can’t help but silently admire you. your disheveled hair, slightly droopy eyes, and sleepy face. every detail of you is so precious. the gorgeous warm hue of the morning sun makes your figure glow beautifully, as if an angel sits across from him.

you are an angel, his angel.

god he missed you so much. to wake up and see you there in the same place as him. to have you there in general, you gracing him with your angelic presence. miguel misses waking up to find you beside him in bed. the softness of you against his roughness. your warmth smoothing him as he awakens, the only source preventing his nightmares. sharing these cute small moments with you while cooking, eating, cleaning, shopping, walking, just anything.

the longer he admires you in silence, realization creeps up to him. you two agreed to reserve the big conversation today after a good long rest from yesterday’s shitshow. suddenly, anxiety invades his body. miguel is nervous as hell to address the elephant in the room, mainly due to your reaction and fear that his reasons won’t be justifiable. he imprinted a large scar on you that will forever be there, it will never heal, not for a long time.

but this will only be his chance to explain himself. miguel can’t lose that opportunity, not when it can lead to a possible future with you and the baby. however, this cute quiet moment between you two right now does not mean things are back to normal. it does not mean it will be like that after the conversation. it will be your decision whether to forgive him or accept his reasons and determine the outcome. it will be your final word.

you also are nervous as hell. a much needed conversation yet you are afraid to discuss it. mainly because of what will be the outcome and future of your relationship. you desperately need to know his reasons. despite the quiet moment right now, the anger and resentment still lingers, bubbling inside you. the pain he left you remains in your fragile heart. the same heart beating with intense anxiety.

it’s the calm before the storm.

you finish your breakfast, which was absolutely delicious, and about to get up from your seat to out away the now dirty plate until a calloused hand stops you by gently taking the plate from your hands.

“hey, i got it.” you pout.

his heart flutters at that pout. goddamnit you’re so adorable. “i got it, preciosa. you stay there.”

“but i just wanted to—”

“no buts, i’ll do everything.” he cuts you off softly with a smile that makes your heart leap once again.

you know this is his attempt of making things up to you. it’s a small start yet it doesn’t change anything or erase the pain. miguel knows it as well.

“we need uh… we need to talk about… y’know?”

a heavy sigh escapes his lips. “we do… uh… let’s head to the couch to be more comfortable, ¿si?”

you nod, hop off the bar stool, and head to the couch. you sit on one end and miguel on the other, some distance between you two. luna comes up to snuggle with you on your lap. anxiety invades both your bodies. now it’s time to discuss this situation, learn the truth, and find a solution, or not. but nevertheless, you were ready to know the truth.

miguel is the more nervous reck, practically sweating his ass off due the anxiety invading his veins like a virus. this is his one and only opportunity.

“i regret what i did… it was a mistake i’ll regret for the rest of my life because leaving you was the stupidest mistake of my life.” his sad eyes meet yours. “i promised to never hurt you pero… i did the one thing i swore to never do… and i hate myself for it.” he adverts his gaze, feeling undeserving often look at you because of the shame and guilt.

you can only offer a pitiful glance. ever since he returned, you have noticed the self-loathing consuming him whole. the guilty and shameful glint in his eyes every time they meet yours.

“i deserve all of your anger and frustration. i hurt you and saying sorry won’t fix anything, it won’t take away the pain i caused you.” a heavy sigh left his lips as he bring up a hand and rubs the temples of his forehead. “i-i was scared… i was afraid that i—”

your brows furrowed in a mixture of confusion and concern. what was miguel afraid of?

another heavy sigh. “when you said you were pregnant, i panicked… i just… i just couldn’t believe it. i couldn’t believe i would be a father, that i would have a baby… i never considered it before and… i was so… scared.” he lowers his hand but never looks back up to face you, instead down at his lap, too afraid to meet your eyes. “i was scared of becoming a father and having a baby because… i would fail you both…”

your frown deepens. “fail us? miguel, what do you mean?” how could he fail you and the baby? it doesn’t make sense. now you’re more concerned.

he had to reveal the truth.

“gabriel… you know that him and i joined together?”

miguel didn’t need to look at you to see you nod, just from his peripheral. he feels his heart aching, proving how hard it was to talk about his brother because the pain and guilt are still strong. you can see him struggling. the way he’s hunched over as if he’s in pain. eyes screwed shut, brows furrowed deeply, fingers pinching the bridge of his nose, knees bouncing. you just want to scoot over and hug him. you almost do but he then continues.

“one mission… it was more intense than others.” he starts off quietly. “it all went wrong unfortunately, we were outnumbered, things went downhill so fast and…” a sob that was threatening to escape was bitten back down his throat as flashbacks of that mission infiltrates his mind. the closer he was to the memory, the harder it was hold back the tears.

flashback of the bullet striking through gabriel’s shoulder, hitting an artery. miguel’s heart stops as his brother collapses onto the ground while the rest of the team fight off the enemy. panic invades his veins as he rushed to his wounded brother, collecting him in his arms and seeking shelter behind a wall, ignoring the pleads of his squad.

“s-shit…” gabriel groans in pain. “definitely hit the spot.” a weak chuckle escapes his lips.

“you’re okay… you’re okay. you’re gonna be okay, hermano.” its also as if miguel is telling himself that, allowing the panic to consume him.

the younger o'hara shakes his head slighty, a weak smile on his lips that are slowly dripping in red. “i-i don’t think t-this time, pendejo…”

“no, no, no. you’re gonna be okay, gabri. ¿me oyes? you’re gonna be fine.”

but the red ooze dripping from gabriel’s lips and the color draining from his skin said otherwise. he was losing him, he was losing his baby brother.

“d-don’t worry a-about me…” a cough of blood makes miguel’s heart ache immensely. “i-i finally g-got to be who i-i wanted to b-be… e-especially contigo, hermano…”

tears swell in his eyes as miguel watched his brother take one final breath and heart beats one last time. a scream of agony erupts from his throat as he clings onto his brother and break into tears.

“miguel?…”

the angelic tone of your voice snaps him out of that horrific memory and looks to see your hand rested on his arm then up to meet your eyes. his own swelled with tears. miguel didn’t realized how close you are, now sitting right beside him.

seeing those gorgeous brown eyes swelled with tears breaks your heart. he was so lost in thought to the point of panicking. you didn’t hesitate to move over and comfort him, you were so worried. you just wanted to pull him into your arms and hug him. miguel shuts his eyes and turns away from you, concealing the tears and guilt.

“gabriel died in combat.”

your heart drops at the heartbreaking revelation.

gabriel died?… now it all makes sense why he was so hesitant to talk about his brother.

he lost him.

miguel fought hard against the tears but no avail, he allowed the dam to break. you don’t hesitate to wrap your arms around him and pull him into a tight embrace, which he accepts immediately. collapsing into your arms, holding you tightly, gripping onto the material of your cardigan as if he’s afraid to let you go, that you would slip out of his arms just like gabriel, as he sobs into your shoulder.

each sob of his breaks a piece of your heart, to the point of your own eyes swelling into tears. it hurts you to hear him break down but you are there to catch him. you embrace his sobbing, shaking figure tightly. digging your fingers into his hair, his grip on your tightens as a response. you don’t ever let go.

“lo siento mucho, miguel…” your soft voice whispers in his ear, making him embrace you tighter.

you feel utterly heartbroken for him. he lost his baby brother in combat, that is traumatic. by what miguel has told you, he and gabriel had a great sibling relationship. he was always by gabriel side for everything. miguel deeply cared about his baby brother. the one person who understood him.

eventually, miguel’s sobs die down and manages to catch his breath after releasing an infinite amount of tears. that left a large wet stain on your cardigan but you don’t care, miguel was all that mattered.

very slowly, his head rises from your now soaked shoulder and leans back to give you some space but still remains close. you look at him but his glossy eyes don’t meet yours. with such tenderness, you wipe his tears with your thumb as you cradle his face. miguel still doesn’t look back but gently rests his forehead against yours and closes his eyes. you simply sit there in silence, basking one another’s presence as miguel takes time to calm down.

after a few minutes of silence, you decide to break it by whispering to him. “you okay?…”

miguel nods slowly and exhales heavily, leaning into your touch as you continue caressing his face. he had to catch his breath to calm down but really you were what calmed him down. utterly melting under your touch, the softness and warmth of your body relaxes him immediately. you are his anchor.

“i was sacred…” barely a whisper yet laced with such remorse and regret. “i was scared of losing you and the baby like i lost gabriel.”

you look up at him with furrowed brows of concern but he still hasn’t meet your eyes.

“losing us? you won’t lose us, amor.” you reassure him in a gentle manner, caressing his cheeks as a way to make him look at you but no avail.

miguel leans away and finally looks back, frowning however. “i failed gabriel, what if i fail you? i failed to protect him, what if i fail to protect you both?”

you shake your head frantically. “you won’t, miguel. what happened to gabriel wasn’t your fault—”

“yes it was.” he cuts you off, turning away but you stop him by gently gripping his chin to look back.

“no, it was not.” a bit firm but still soft. “i know you blame yourself but it wasn’t your fault. just know that gabriel was happy to be with his brother, he wouldn’t want to be anywhere or anyone else but you.”

those glossy brown eyes soften a little by your words. perhaps you’re right, gabriel was at least safe in his arms during his last moments. at least miguel was there with him. it would have been worse if it was any other scenario and miguel didn’t want to think that.

“miguel, escúchame…” those same soft brown eyes look up at you as you cradle his face. “i know you’re afraid and now i understand why… but i promise you won’t lose us, you won’t fail us. we won’t go anywhere, we’ll always be here, with you.”

miguel swears he could cry once again. all he can do is just stare at you with nothing but adoration in his eyes. heart sudden refilled with love that you always provide. those ugly doubts and fears slowly fade away by your words of comfort and reassurance. he rests his hands on top of yours, gives them a gentle squeeze then brings them up to his lips and places a soft kiss to them as a sign of affection and gratitude. the act emits a soft smile on your face.

“i know we just had a heartbreaking conversation but… i still need to know what happened those three weeks.” you look at him hesitantly.

miguel knows you’re right. he admitted his fears and reasons but still hasn’t fully explained himself, especially during those shitty three weeks.

“i know…” his hands release yours as he leans away, turning away to run a hand through his hair with a heavy sigh. “i… i have this hidden cabin off the outskirts of town, that’s where i stayed during those weeks. i didn’t do anything. i barely ate or slept, always had nightmares every time.”

your brows furrowed concerningly. “nightmares?”

another heavy sigh escapes his lips. “of you and the baby… me dying in combat and leaving you alone with the baby… failing you both…”

another revelation that shatters your heart. his trauma has worsened to the extent of having nightmares of dying and losing his family.

this poor, poor man.

“my phone was completely off, i never received any calls or texts. when i did turned it back on, i saw your text about your doctors appointment and i cried…”

your eyes widen slightly in surprise. he… cried?

“you went alone… i wasn’t there for you… i hatred myself for that, i still do.”

the unpleasant memory of your first appointment flashed across your mind. how utterly heartbroken and abounded you felt sitting in the waiting area full of couples. how anxious you felt when you entered the examination room, learning about your pregnancy, and seeing your baby for the first time. how angry you felt when you mentioned to your OB that miguel wasn’t in the picture.

one last sigh from his lips before miguel turns to you with pleading eyes. “mi alma, i know what i did is unforgivable and i’ll forever regret it for the rest of my fucking life. no amount of sorrys could ever take away the pain i caused you. i hurt you and i will never forgive myself. you have every reason to hate me, i deserve it all.” very slowly, his hand gently takes yours. “but know that i love you, i never stopped loving you and never will. eres mi mundo, mi corazón, mi alma gemela, todo.”

it was impossible to not feel bashful by all the adorable endearments. every nickname miguel gave you, it never fails to make your heart flutter.

“i know i can’t go back change the past, i know i can’t take away your pain from those three weeks but i promise you that i want to be part of this.” miguel said sincerely, eyes boring into yours. “i want to have this baby with you, i want to be a father, i want to be a family and raise this baby contigo.”

sudden a rush of adoration flows through you, almost overwhelming but… in a good way? his behavior since last night proved how different he was, he’s still the same kind man you fell in love with and how he wasn’t against having the baby. the way his eyes widen then soften and smiled when he touched your baby bump for the first time proved to you that miguel already loved the baby. you want nothing more than for him to be a part of this family and have this baby together. but that doesn’t mean the consequences of his actions are ignored.

“i… i’m so happy to hear that, miguel, and i want nothing more than to do this together but…” your tone turns more serious. “i can’t forgive you, not yet.”

miguel expected that and he did not blame you one bit because he doesn’t deserve your forgiveness.

“you hurt me, miguel. i know it was bomb dropping news, it was a shitshow, i take part for being irresponsible about the pill, and that it triggered your fears but you hurt me real fucking bad.”

he did and miguel will never forgive himself.

“those were the shittiest three weeks of my life. you weren’t there when i needed you the most.”

he can hear the hurt in your voice and it pains his heart. he has caused so much damage.

“now that you’re here, i’m gonna tell you this.”

miguel’s attention is precise and solely on you, prepared for what you will say.

you look up straight in his eyes with pure sincerity. “if you want to be a part of this, you have to work for it. show me that you want this.”

miguel understands completely. prove his commitment to this family, to you and the baby. and goddamn he will, miguel will do everything he can to prove to you that he wants this.

“i will, i promise, mi amor.” his hands give yours a gentle squeeze, signifying his words.

you believe him.

this is the beginning of rebuilding your relationship. it will require lots of progress but you have faith miguel will prove himself and the love will soon be restored.

it’s a good starting point.

𝐓𝐀𝐆𝐋𝐈𝐒𝐓. ♡ @reverieblondie @nina-from-317 @kavimoo @aly29a2001 @lazyjellyfish300 @tojishugetiddies @aphinthestars @novelaaaaaaaa @imamexican @obessgurlll @deputy-videogamer @lovehadlovelost @agoddoesnotplead @saintdiior @whoopwhoppghost @tomalymme @skadiloki @asterrrrose @glossygreene @youcantseem3 @resident-clown @kutsipie @zuevcs @totorotales-08 @meowgirl1 @sukunash0e @sirendyes @leahnicole1219 @lisa-takeshi @yehet-moi-ohorat @slowlyshycomputer @wasitforrevenge @webshoootrz @f1-hoff @chaeriescola @espressopatronum454 @trocaderoisyummy @totallygyomeiswife @mcmiracles @celestialgarden23 @tatatida @whdhjfjvjvjfjdhsj @nocturne-light @xenop0p @juneonhoth @ghostsdoll @marshmallowsforever @ibelyss @imissubaee ( if you’re not tagged, age/age-range is require since this fic is 18+, context for reasons why )

© teenidlegirl. don’t steal, plagiarize, or translate my work. ♡

[a-force-dyad-in-space]

RED - The blood of angry men BLACK - The dark of ages past RED - A world about to dawn BLACK - The night that ends at last

"The ABC Café / Red & Black", Les Misérables (Enjolras's Lyrics)

And nothing bad happened ever and everyone got a happy end! 😋

Marius's Lyrics

[dabi-drift]

Villains’ S/O on Her Period - Incomplete:

If you want any characters adding here or to anything else I write, just drop me a comment or an ask!

Atsuhiro Sako/Mr Compress:

❀ You never let yourself show emotion, while at the mercy of the League. They'd taken you as collateral about four months ago, and every incident had been avoided (probably the stress).

❀ Until now.

❀ Compress couldn’t wrap his head around your sudden mood swings - the way you transitioned from cold and brooding to crying out an ocean, to the most affectionate girl on the planet. He couldn’t deny that the latter made him feel incredibly special, but at first he'd figured maybe it was an effort to feign loyalty or subservience, a ploy to lower his guard.

❀ Well, clearly it was something more serious.

❀ In the end, he consulted Toga. It must've been a girl thing, like an early onset of the menopause or something.

❀ When she reminded him that periods existed, his soul left his body. He hadn't even considered that. He wasn’t grossed out or anything - just concerned. He didn’t wanna directly ask you what you needed, so he just had Toga steal a bunch of sanitary products (watching him fret over you was way too funny, so she didn’t bother mentioning that she'd already got the stuff).

❀ Ngl, when Compress remembered why periods were a thing, he did get a little embarrassed. It was like his mind wouldn’t let him forget that you were indeed an adult woman, who could conceive (his children).

❀ The thoughts entered whenever he was alone, or close to the room in which you were being held. Simply walking past it was enough to add colour to his cheeks, and he didn’t have any clue how to handle that.

❀ Your rooms weren't too far apart.

❀ He hoped no-one could hear him through the walls.

❀ He'd taken a fancy to you since the beginning, make no mistake. And he definitely wouldn’t act on anything…unless you happened to insinuate that his feelings were reciprocated.

❀ Not that you ever would, being both a hostage and hostile toward emotions. Well, it didn’t stop the dreams.

❀ Toga would eventually tell you about Compress' concern, and after a few days, he assumed the role of tampon thief. This gave Toga a break and him an opportunity to grow closer to you, and to help you in your hour of need.

❀ This man will 100% be upset when it's over. You were vulnerable for once, leaning on him for support when the cramps kicked in, feasting on the chocolate he stole, as his loving gaze swept over you. He won't show this sadness though. He'll mask it under relief, being all 'Thank goodness you no longer have to suffer through that, my dear.'

❀ You'll feel so humiliated. But that won't last. Compress saw you at a very bad point - saw, helped…stayed. You won't fully trust him, but you let him a little closer.  

❀ He'll be absolutely over-the-moon.

❀ And if you ever give him your heart, make sure to treasure him, 'cause he's gonna spoil you rotten.

Touya Todoroki/Dabi:

❀ Dabi's gonna know you're in pain, but it'll take a lot of convincing and possibly bribing for him to help. He's likely to view it as a chore, no matter how much he loves you. It's one of those disgusting things you can deal with alone. Why would you need the aid of someone who neither understands nor empathises?

❀ Let's be real, this man knows nothing about periods. Although, it wouldn’t actually make a difference if he did.

❀ If you become more sensitive to the cold, he'll definitely warm you up, but that's a privilege he'll make you earn. He's rather hard-hearted, so cuddles are especially difficult to come by. He won't dish them out, free of charge.

❀ Not until you're together for a few years, at least. After this substantial time, he'll begin to grow more comfortable with you (that was a trial period). You'll see a gradual change in his attitude, toward both physical contact and your…monthly cycle.

❀ Still won't be seen dead in the sanitary section of a shop, though. Can and will make you buy your own stuff (with Endeavor's money).

❀ How does he keep getting that

❀ Seriously, you gotta stop him.

❀ Will let you use his hand as a makeshift hot water bottle. He looks annoyed, but don't fall for the deception. Just smile and rest your head on his shoulder. He'll melt in an instant.

❀ He's eternally thankful for your lack of mood swings. If he's being honest with himself, he'd probably just up and leave if that posed an issue. He loved you, sure, but he also loved putting as little effort into things as humanly possible.

❀ Sometimes he wishes you were a guy

❀ Will tease you mercilessly if he catches even a glimpse of a pad or a tampon. Because he's a total dick, he'll often hold or throw them out of your reach, or force you to search for them. If you don't kick him in the nuts, he'll give you their location on his deathbed.

❀ Chop them off

❀ It's 50% comfort, 50% dread. For both parties.

Geten/Iceman:

❀ Confused, panicked, a little irritated. Will not know what to do when he finds you clutching your abdomen, crying for the gods to take away your uterus. But in the next second, you're so angry?? It's like, just pick an emotion? Why do you have to be so difficult?

❀ Throw a pillow at his face and he might ask you what's wrong

❀ So much of your hostility is directed towards him, he'll think you've fallen out of love. You'll have to explain what you're dealing with, the symptoms and the unfortunate fact that chocolate is the only cure. He thinks you're being pathetic

❀ "You don't need any chocolate. You said you feel bloated."

❀ "Getennn!! You're my boyfriend, not my dietician!"

❀ He'll probably expect you to bear this burden alone. What does it have to do with him? It's gross and he wants no part of it. Completely unwilling to buy sanitary products. He draws the line at chocolate. Use your puppy dog eyes and cry at him for a while (and maybe beg, too). That might work.

❀ Hates it when you hide under layer upon layer of bedsheets, then complain about being too warm. Secretly loves it, since you need him as close as possible to counteract the heat

❀ He'll fall asleep beside you, blotting out all memory of the talk you just had, and wake up in a panic when he sees you bleeding. He should've got you them pads

❀ Shakes you awake. "(Y/n)?? Are you still alive?!"

❀ And now you're panicked, and also crying. "I don't know??"

❀ "What do you mean you don't know??"

❀ Your headaches are vicious - like a thousand ice picks simultaneously raining down on you. Thankfully, your ever-so caring boyfriend is comfortable enough to buy painkillers. He'll also toy with the idea of buying pads or tampons, but the aisle that houses them is always overrun.

❀ Your little ice gremlin can't handle that level of humiliation. But if you really can't make it to the shop, he'll seek out Curious to go for you. Despite his drawn-out sighs and his complaints, he doesn't want you to suffer.

❀ He's relieved when your period ends. Until you remind him that you're due one every month. For now though, it feels like a weight has been lifted. Because it was so much worse for him

❀ He's shocked by the disparity between your personality on and off your period. In the days following the end of your cycle, you give him lots of kisses and snuggles, to atone for your prior behaviour. He adores this.

❀ He'll try to do better for you, to help you more in your time of need. You're always so good to him. He should be good to you, too.

❀ But if he finds bloodstains on your underwear, he's gonna have trauma flashbacks, so I hope you can handle the guilt.

[mediocre-writerr]

i lived [leah rilke]

leah rilke x fem reader

requested: Woooow feel something was literally the best thing ever. Could I pretty please request a third part (most angsty) where reader gets herself in the worst situation possible and her condition is so bad (her heart stops beating) once Shelby finds her, she’s hyserical and doesn’t realize she has to perform CPR so Leah being the protective girlfriend but if not evenly even more worried than Shelby does CPR and tells her not to give up. Later while they’re all taking care of reader and watching her sleep off the pain they talk about how much they mean to her (especially Shelby and Leah) this would be the best thing ever 😭😭

thank you guys so much for all the love on my leah imagine and just all my imagines in general! i’m going a bit out of order with these requests but this caused inspiration to strike. i’ll be back back on track soon, coming out with a shelby one next! but yeah i’m so happy you’re loving them! and i hope you enjoy!

Pt.1 & Pt.2

*not my gif*

Ironic isn’t it? Even though you’re taught at a young age to carry love in your heart, but in reality it could kill you.

“Where are you going?” Leah asks softly as you stood up from the sand.

You brushed off your pants before answering, “I’m just gonna go for a walk. See if I can find anything on the shore. Would you like to come?” 

It was a hotter day than usual out on the island. Sweat beads were forming on the top of your hairline. All of the girls seemed to be out of energy from the burning sun that laid upon the nine of you.

“Mmm no. I would much rather stay here in the shade, you could stay with me too. You don’t have to scavenge every hour of the day.” she says, grabbing your hand to try and pull you back towards her.

You smile at her softly, kissing her hand, “I’ll be back. It won’t take long.” you say.

She pouts, but you just chuckle before placing a soft kiss to her lips. 

Before you went off on the little voyage, you checked up on your blonde best friend, “How’s the leg?” you ask, examining the jacket bandage you made for her out of your own jacket.

“I’ve had better days.” she replies with a shrug.

“I’m sorry. But I know it’ll be healed up sooner than later, but until then you know you always have me to lean on.” you say, smiling at her, “I’m heading out to the shore to see if anything comes up, you’re free to join me whenever.” 

“I will later. Thank you.” Shelby says with a smile matching your own.

“Anytime.” 

And then you were off, walking slowly along the beach shore to see if anything washed up. It was nice though. 

The peace and quiet. The soft wet sand in between your toes as the cool water occasionally lapped over them. It was a nice distraction from the burning sensation that occurred in your chest or when you breathed.

It started after you went to save Shelby. And you just thought it would go away on its own, but it’s been almost 24 hours now and it wasn’t going away. But rather it got worse.

Each breath you took felt like you just ran a mile. But you didn’t want to worry the girls. They’ve already been worried sick about you and all of the stunts you pull. This doesn’t need to be another thing they’re worried about. 

You let out a fit of cough. The cough seemed to have lasted forever, but it finally stopped when you spat out a loogie. It wasn’t any loogie though, blood was on the yellow sand and you just stared at it in shock. Unsure of what to do.

You were about to start heading back when you noticed a bag at the end of the shoreline.

One last trek. We’ll bring the bag back and relax for a couple days. 

As you start walking to the bag, you can feel your heart rate rising even higher with each step. And it felt like you were walking on walls as the whole world seemed to spin faster and faster. 

All of your senses were heightened. The smell of the sea water invaded your senses. A ringing sensation filled your eardrums making it impossible to hear anything else.

“Leah...” you whisper before the bright blue sky went black.

Shelby decided to take your offer and go walk along the shore with you. Despite the pain in her leg, she thought it would be nice to walk around with her best friend. 

You’ve been so focused on not dying that you haven’t had time to just sit and talk.

Shelby misses going bowling and drinking 7/11 slurpees in the parking lot with you every Friday night. 

Or you coming to her beauty pageants even though you hated the idea of them. You wanted to come to just support her.

The two of you haven’t even thought about what you should do when you get back. There was Shelby and Toni and you and Leah. If news got out about that back home, you’d be burnt at the stake.

But the two of you don’t care anymore. 

Shelby look down at the shore to try and get a peek of how far you went. Until she sees a body was lying still face down towards the end of the shoreline. 

“Y/N?” Shelby mumbles quietly to herself.

She makes a full 360 trying to find any sign of her best friend. But came out empty. 

“No.” she mumbles and took off running.

Despite how terrible her leg felt she had to get to you. 

Shelby reaches your lifeless body and scooped you into her arms. She cradles you into her lap and cups your cheek gently.

“Y/N? Hey, hey...” Shelby whispers and your eyes flutter open for just a second.

“Shelb?” I whisper softly.

“Hey it’s me. What’s going on?” she ask frantically.

“There’s something wrong,” you mumble softly, “I’m scared.” 

“No, no, no,” she murmured, “You’re just tired and it’s hot out. You’re just exhausted. Remember that plane? It’s gonna come and we’re-we’re gonna get out of here. Together.” 

You brush her hair from out of her face, before smiling softly, “I think it’s more than exhaustion, blondie. I don’t know what’s wrong or how much time I have with whatever-”

“No,” Shelby says forcefully, “No, you can’t die. We’re supposed to go home together.” 

“I know, but each second that passes by it’s becoming harder and harder to breathe.” I whisper in between raspy breath. 

“We’re supposed to go back to Texas, graduate, and move the hell out of that place. We can get an apartment with Toni and Leah. And we’ll finally be happy. We don’t have to worry about our terrible parents or some higher standard. It’ll be us just like we always planned. Y/N, please. You can’t go.” I rant to her, telling her about the life we could have out of our normal lives.

“I’m right here,” you told her shakily, wanting to be brave for her, “Are-are you crying?”

You reached up to touch her face, and sure enough there were tears dripping down her cheeks.

“I-I haven’t seen you cry since-,” you say trying to finish the rest of your sentence, but as time goes by you could feel your heart slowing down, “Since Becs died.” 

“Please,” Shelby begged, grabbing your hand tightly, “Please...we need to go home.” 

“You’re...you’re the best friend I ever had,” you whisper, your breathing starting to come in short gasps, “My sister for a lifetime, I love you. And I need you to keep living the way you’re living right now. No expectations. Just be you. Tell Leah that I love he-”

You let out a harsh choking sound as you went limp in her body. Your heavy eyes now closed. 

Shelby places her fingers on your pulse point. Come on Y/N. Please.

“Please God. Don’t take Y/N away from me. You already took Becs. Please don’t take her. She’s all I have left.” she sobs out.

You had no pulse. Nothing. There’s nothing!

“Dot! Leah! Someone help!” Shelby yells as loud as she possibly could. 

The rest of the girls could hear her pleads from the campsite. All of them took one look at each other before taking off running towards her yelling. 

When the rest of the girls reach the shore. Shelby still has you scooped up into her lap. Leah let out a small gasp running to your side immediately.

“What’s wrong?” Toni asks.

Shelby was struggling for the words to say, “She uh she just...her heart just stopped. I found her collapsed on the floor and she was here...she was just talking to me and then she was-”

“We need to start CPR!” Nora says getting everyone’s attention.

Leah scooped you out of her arms and placed you flat on the floor. Tears falling down her cheeks onto your chest as she started doing the compressions. 

Toni took Shelby into her arms, trying her best to soothe her best friend. 

“Come on Y/N! You promised me! You told me you weren’t gonna leave me!” she yells.

Her compressions going out of rhythm, “Leah, you’re not doing it right. It’s not gonna help her if you can’t do it right!” Rachel yells, “Move!”

Rachel was about to start taking over when Shelby got out from Toni’s arms, “No I can do it!” 

“Are you sure?” Toni asks her girlfriend softly and Shelby just nods.

Rachel pushed Leah off of your body despite her screaming protests. Fatin pulls Leah into her arms. Leah’s head rested on Fatin’s chest as she ran her hands through Leah’s hair. 

Shelby’s compressions were surprisingly calm and even despite the sobs coursing through her body.

“You do not get to save everyone and not let us save you. Do you hear me?” Shelby whispers to you softly. 

Leah crawls out of Fatin’s lap and places herself lying next to you on the ground. She ran her fingers through your hair and placed her nose up against your cheek. 

Shelby was at for a long time. And at that point everyone started to lose hope that you were gone.

“Please Y/N. I’m not ready to say goodbye. We have a whole future left outside of this fucking island. Stay for me.” Leah pleads. 

Your eyes shoot open and your gasping for breath. Everyone releases a sigh of relief. All of the girls had tears on their cheeks, all of them thinking the worst. 

“You’re okay!” Shelby lets out a sob as she immediately leans down to hold you. You wrap your arms around your blonde best friend holding her as tight as possible, “You can’t die.” she whispers. 

“I’m right here Shelb. I’m not going anywhere. I promise.” you say, your voice raspy and tired. 

“Dude you really need to stop dying. It’s getting a little old.” Toni says, trying to ease the tense silence.

You laugh softly before giving her a fist bump. All of the girls stared at you with relieved smiles on their faces. Dot, Fatin, and Rachel gave you high fives and fist bumps. But much to your surprise Nora leaned down herself to hug you.

You turn your head slightly to face Leah, her nose still against your cheek not wanting to open her eyes. If she opened her eyes she would wake up and it would be just this sick dream. 

You rested your forehead on hers, the tip of her nose touching yours ever so slightly. 

“Hey, look at me.” you whisper and her deep blue eyes finally stare right back at you.

She smiles softly, before cries shake throughout her body. Her soft hand goes to cup your cheek, pulling your face unbelievably closer to yours. You weakly reach out your hand and wipe away the tears that were falling. 

“You’re still here?” she says, but it comes more out like a question.

“I promised, didn’t I?” you reply, before kissing her softly. 

When you broke apart Shelby scooped you up in her arms yet again carrying you bridal style. 

“Shelb, I can walk.” you say.

But she just shakes her head, her perfect smile appearing on her face, “I don’t care. I’m gonna carry you back.” 

All of the girls walk back to the camp. Leah sits down right next to where Shelby laid you gently on the floor. You rested your head on her lap as you could feel sleep slowly lull you into dreamland. 

The burning sun was now setting and the orange hue of the fire lit up the deep blue night sky. You were still fast asleep on Leah’s lap, soft snores coming from your mouth.

“You know she’s almost died 6 times?” Nora says, speaking up as all of you sat there in silence drinking your Diet Cokes. 

“How do you know that?” Dot asks, surprised at how she can keep track of all of it. 

“I journaled it. The first time was the plane crash, then the mirror, the overexertion, saving Fatin, saving Shelby, and then right now.” Nora rambles, showing us the chart she made.

“She really put herself before the group.” Rachel whispers, shaking her head, “I remember when I had my period accident on Dot, she came to talk to me. She made me a makeshift tampon out of her shorts. She literally cut off pieces of her shorts to make me a tampon.” 

Everyone laughs at the fond memory. Leah was there running her hands through your hair lightly, careful not to wake you up. 

“Besides totally saving me from getting stranded in the middle of the ocean. When I was super thirsty because of the Takis, she gave me her water and let me take a few sips. She never got on me about not doing anything.” Fatin says smiling at your sleeping figure.

“And one day we played this cool game where we would pass the journal back and forth only making one line to create a drawing. It was beautiful.” Nora says softly, showing everyone the abstract drawing the two of you made together.

“We went exploring one day and I never told you guys this, but my pants ripped,” Dot begins to say and everyone bursts out into laughter.

“No way!” Toni exclaims, but Dot just nods with a smile on her face.

“Yeah and after laughing for a little bit, she took off her jacket and wrapped it around my waist so no one would notice.” Dot replies smiling a little bit, “Not only that, but back home when my dad was sick, she would stop by every other week to check on him and bring food.” 

“She did that?” Shelby asks.

Dot nods softly, a sad smile on her face, “He left an impression on her after our league soccer days. So when she found out, she wanted to visit him and make him feel normal.” 

“Wow.” Shelby mumbles, surprised at her best friend antics.

“When Marcus disappeared, I got a little sadder than I was supposed to about a mannequin. So she took the time to make a sandman to replace him. It was just a snowman made of sand and it was washed away by the tide shortly after. But it was the thought that counts.” Martha says and everyone’s faces were lit up by smiles.

Toni wrapped her arm around Shelby’s waist pulling her in a little closer, “One time we went scavenging together. And I told her about my basketball and how I used to play and she got so excited for some reason. In the middle of the jungle we played a small game with a rock and an empty Diet Coke can we had. I won, obviously.” 

“Back home, we went to the 7/11 we always go to every Friday night. And I didn’t have my teeth in because I was eating. Then a bunch of girls from our school came by and saw the dentures lying on the hood of her car. They started making fun of them asking who’s they were. And Y/N flat out said it was hers. No hesitation because she knew how insecure I was of them.” Shelby whispers shaking her head and smiling at the fond memory.

“I remember that! Everyone was calling her grandma, they still do...” Dot says.

“Yeah. She really took one for the team there, but she never expected anything back. She just did it, to do it.” she says softly, before clearing her throat, “And when our friend Becs died, Y/N made a whole concert filled with terrible dancing and singing for me because I wasn’t doing well mentally. It was the best concert I have ever been to.” she whispers.

She cleared her throat again, trying to fight back the tears, “She’s my best friend. She’s like a sister to me and without her, I don’t know what I’d do. Out of the gifts God has given me, I think Y/N is the best one ever. She’s a literal angel on Earth.”

“Well, I met Y/N at a strange time in my life. I wasn’t doing well mentally. And she may not have saved my life physically. But mentally she did. It’s like she just came out of nowhere, an angel in this fucked up island.” Leah begins, smiling down at the girl in front of her, “There was this time where I was on the verge of having a mental breakdown and she sang me a random song that she came up with in her head.” 

“Was it the one that went: dinosaurs eating people, dinosaurs in love...” Fatin starts singing.

Leah nods softly, “Dinosaurs having a party. They eat fruit and cucumber. They fell in love. They say “Thank you.” A big bang came, and they died. Dinosaurs dinosaurs fell in love. But they didn’t say goodbye. But the didn’t say good...BYE!” All of the girls sing loudly at the top of their lungs.

“I think after she sang that to you, she sang it to all of us when we were down on ourselves.” Rachel says and everyone smiles at the stupid song.

“God I’m so thankful for her. I think I would’ve actually lost my mind.” Leah whispers before placing a kiss onto your forehead.

“You’re so whipped.” Toni says teasing the other brunette.

“I know.” Leah replies, accepting the truth.

There was a comfortable silence that hung over the group. As they sat back and reflected on their time here in the island.

“Honestly, I don’t think we’d be here without our very own Supergirl.” Dot says and all of the girls nod in agreement.

“To Supergirl!” Toni says, raising her Diet Coke up in the air.

“To Supergirl!” The rest of the girls yell as they all raise their cans in the air.

[sweetblink]

I’m Sorry.

I’m Sorry.

___________________

Jay Halstead x Reader

Requested by: @megafandomsxassemble

#36 & #40 2nd prompt list. Do Kelly Severide or Jay Halstead and after character leaves she cries on the highway while driving and she winds up driving her car into the water and they have to do CPR and stuff to get her breathing again and rush her to Chicago med. Super angsty and feels.

#36. "Just please, give me another chance." ... "I'm done giving you chances, I'm done."

#40. "What are you so afraid of?" ... "Having my heartbroken by you, that's what I'm afraid of."

Warning: angst, car crash, Severide sister.

___________________

To say that things haven’t been going well between you and Jay, was very noticeable. Almost everyone could sense the huge tense silence when others were around the both of you. It didn’t help that Jay was constantly blowing you off, him preferring to hang out with is work partner, and it also didn’t help that your older brother, Kelly was making thing more tense, and picking fights with him.

Tonight, it was supposed to be your five-year anniversary, but he still wasn’t home. Letting out a small sigh, you just served your plate of food grabbed the wine bottle and made your way towards the dining table and started to eat alone.

You were about to finish eating, when the doorbell rang, and you let out a small frown, walking up to the door, grabbing the bat by the door, and peeked through the peephole, you let out a sigh of relief, when you saw that it was Kelly. Opening the door, you gave your older brother a fake smile.  

“Hey, what are you doing here?”

He just raised an eyebrow at you and walked in the apartment. “Don’t try that fake smile on me, you know better than doing that.”

Your face fell and just closed the door. “What do you want Kelly?”

He turned to you. “I just wanted to come and check up on you. I was at Molly’s and saw your boyfriend there and you weren’t, I thought something was up, so I came.”

You looked at him in the eye, tears already forming in your eyes. Kelly’s gaze softened up and he pulled you in for a hug, which only caused you to break down. “What am I doing wrong?”

“Nothing, you’re doing nothing wrong, baby girl. Jay’s is just an idiot who doesn’t know how to cherish you.”

You pulled away from the hug and wiped your eyes. “Today is our five-year anniversary, and I doubt he remembers that.” You admitted, looking away. You let out a bitter laugh. “I don’t think I ever felt much like a fool as I do right now. I should’ve known that this was going to happen.” You said, remembering the rough months that you went through when he lost a friend of his.

Kelly grimaced. “I wish there was something I can do to help.” He replied, rubbing your arms.

You just looked down to your feet. “Can I stay with you?” you whispered.

“You don’t even have to ask, baby girl, you know I will say yes.”

You just nodded and looked up at the ceiling to keep yourself from crying and made your way towards yours and Jay’s room. “I’m just gonna pack some things, I need time away from here to figure out what I want to do.”

Kelly helped you pack some things. “What do you want to do?”

You paused and looked at him. “I don’t know.” You whispered.

Kelly just nodded and gently wrapped an arm around. “It’s all going to be okay in the end.” He muttered. You just nodded and the both of you started to pack most of your things up, by the time Jay finally came home, most of your stuff was gone and all he could do was just stare at the empty side of his bed when it came time to finally sleep.

*************************

The following two days were past in a hazy daze, spending most of your time, thinking about what you were gonna do with Jay and the whole somewhat mess, that was your relationship. Sighing you just let out a groan, and Kelly turned to you.

“Still can’t figure it out, huh?” he asked, as he gathered his bag, to head off into his shift for 24 hours.

You turned to your older brother and shrugged. “I can’t continue being unhappy, Kelly. I love him so much, but what he’s doing, it hurts.” You admitted. “And I can’t allow myself to go through that pain, that he’s putting me through.”

Kelly just nodded and watched as you grabbed your bag, phone and keys. “Wait, where are you going?”

“To Jay’s place, I need to get the rest of my stuff, and tell him that we’re through, I love him, but I got to think about my own happiness.” You replied, making your leave.

About a long drive towards Jay’s place, you looked out of the car window, and saw that the lights were on, taking a deep breath in, you got out your car, and started to make your way inside the building. Your nerves were acting up, and finally you reached the apartment door that belonged to Jay and knocked on it.

You can hear someone letting out a groan from the inside. “What?” Jay snapped, answering the door. He froze when he noticed that it was you standing. “Y/N.”

Giving him a tight smile and small wave. “Hey.”

“Came to get the rest of your stuff?” He snarled. Your jaw tightens.

“You would assume.” You replied coolly.

Jay just snorted and stepped aside allowing you to enter, you let out a small scoff and entered, looking around the place. “Came here to judge me or something?”

“Can you stop with that tone?” you snapped, taking a deep breath in, you looked away from Jay’s intense gaze. “I actually came to talk about us.”

Jay didn’t reply for a second and then looked away. “Why do you always leave? It’s just like last time.” He paused, waiting for you to answer, but you didn’t respond. "What are you so afraid of?"

You stared at him, while you processed the question he just asked you, "Having my heartbroken by you, that's what I'm afraid of."

Jay just stared at you, and you can see the anger rising in his eyes, you just let out a small bitter laugh, trying to resist the urge to cry, because it was happening, you guys were finally going to call it quits, you can just feel it.

“God, Jay, you don’t get it. All the small stunts you’ve been pulling, hurts me. Wanna know what the final straw was?” You ask, now crying. “You not being here on the night of our five-year anniversary. Jay’s face crumpled a bit.

“I’m sorry.” Jay replied softly. “I just- I’m really am sorry.”

You let out a sob and shook your head at him. “Wanna know what’s the worst thing about all this?” Jay shook his head. “It feels like whatever we do, it’s never going to work out.”

Jay froze. “Are you breaking up with me?” he whispered.

“I don’t want to Jay, but this? It’s hurting me a lot, I can’t let you break me, I love you, but I love myself even more, and I’m not going to put myself through more pain, when you won’t change on how you act towards our relationship.”

Jay took a step forward, his face morphed in desperation. “Y/N, please. Just please, give me another chance."

You shook your head. "I'm done giving you chances, I'm done."

Jay had tears rolling down his cheek. “Please.”

Shaking your head, you just turned back and ran out the front door, ignoring his cries. Crying you just kept on running, until you got into your car, quickly you turned on the engine, and basically sped out the apartments parking lot, not even daring to stop until you got near the highway.

Now fully sobbing, you were feeling around for your phone in the passenger seat, no being able to find it, you let out a small desperate cry, you took your eyes off the road, and searched for your phones, when you heard a loud car honk, gasping you managed to swerve the car, and let out a loud yell when your car managed to hit the curb and flew over into the huge canal of water.

****************************

Kelly’s heart pounded, as he was doing CPR on his little sister, Y/N, while Gabby was getting the bag ready. He really didn’t think that this was how he was going to start his long hours shift, as he continues to compress his sister’s chest, as he heard one of her ribs break, and he finally felt of his tears roll down his cheek.

“Alright we got a pulse, let’s go!” Gabby yelled. Kelly just nodded, and bit his lip to keep it from trembling. Kelly helped the girls load his sister up in the ambo, and then he turned to his Chief.

“Chief.” He began, but Boden beat him to it.

“Go, we’ll catch up.”

Kelly nodded, and he got in the back with Gabby, who was quickly handing him stuff and telling him what to do, as Sylvie quickly closed the ambo doors and rushed to the driver’s seat and quickly rushed them off.

Kelly looked down, and pressed his forehead against yours. “Please, don’t leave me.” He whispered as he gently kissed her forehead. Gabby glanced at him for a second and went back to checking Y/N’s vitals.

They quickly reached the med, and Kelly saw that Ethan, and April were outside ready to help them, Kelly had gotten off, about to help when he heard Jay screaming out his name, he ignored him and watched as they rushed you in the ER.

“Kelly, how is she?”

Kelly turned and stopped him. “She only went to go pick up the rest of her stuff and talk to you, what happened?” he growled out. Jay paused and stared at him.

“We had another argument, and she broke things off, she took off upset, and crying.” Jay admitted.  

Kelly rubbed his forehead. “You didn’t think to stop her? You know how Y/N gets when she’s upset.” He growled out. Jay tried to say something but shut his mouth, but he stopped before he got another word out. “You know what, go home Jay, I don’t want to even see you right now, and I don’t ever want to see you near my sister.

Jay just watched Kelly go inside the hospital, and he let out a sigh. He knew that this was all his fault, especially since he screwed up everything with Y/N. he let out a small sigh, and turned to walk towards his car, walking away from the future he could’ve have.

__________________________

Sorry this was crappy, I’m trying to do this while balancing my adult responsibilities. :)

Was this any good?

Masterlist.