#monster lady Gaga voice don’t look at me like that

[ataraxiaspainting]

Careless Whisper.

Yan Gojo x F Reader.

Synopsis: After a long game of playing hard to get, Satoru finally gets you to go on a date with him. But you didn’t expect him to choose a farmer’s market of all places for it to happen.

Warnings: Yandere themes, threats of kidnapping, manipulation, and stalking.

Continuation of There is an Uproar.

Word Count: 1.6k.

Ten Songs Like This Piece:

This Could Be Us by Rae Sremmurd

Get Up by NewJeans

Supermassive Black Hole by Muse

Bathroom by Montell Fish

Hotel by Montell Fish

Money Trees by Kendrick Lamar (feat. Jay Rock)

After Hours by The Weeknd

Government Hooker by Lady Gaga

Do I Wanna Know? by Arctic Monkeys

The Walls by Chase Atlantic

“You’re killing me; don’t you see that you’re the winner of the game?” – Benét, Killing Eve

*~*~*~*

You hold onto the basket like a lifeline. 

You grasp the handle so tightly it leaves a mark on your palm and the inner parts of your fingers, and you can practically feel splinters impaling them.

They say the devil takes on many forms, and if it were said that the devil could take the form of a white-haired man with sunglasses in whatever religious texts you were given in your childhood, you would believe that without question.

The identity of whoever or whatever forced you on this little outing is not human. You know this. He can’t be. If he is, your view of humanity will decrease tenfold from where it once was.

Should you pray to all the higher powers and heavens above that he is or is not?

“Come on, let’s get moving!” They say monsters speak in either honeyed, calm, and sweet voices or grimy and croaky ones; but this one is neither. “I kinda want to pet a chicken.”

*~*~*~*

“There’s my girlie!” 

You were not surprised in the slightest when Satoru pulled up to your door with a Rolls-Royce. At the sight and the called-out nickname, you even roll your eyes and cross your arms, much to the driver’s amusement. The car is adorned with lamb's wool carpets, embellished with stunning wood and milled aluminum accents, and encased in box grain leather. Only the highest quality materials for the all-high and mighty Satoru Gojo. It is the topmost privilege for a mere mortal like you to even see it. 

“You ready?” As you ever will be.

“Yeah.” Your response is quick and to the point. “You still haven’t even told me where we are going for this… date.”

The smirk that appears on his face instantly gives you the impulse to slap it off. But he is stronger, and will most likely not let you, because he is the one in control and not you. So, as he beckons you closer, you close the car door behind you and sit down on the leather seat. The drive to hit him still stands for as long as you anticipated. You just look out the window and hope it goes away.

It is nice outside. Though if Satoru’s foot was not on the peddle, you would have liked it more.

It’s spring now. The grass is bright green and tall, and you could swear that you can smell it. Tiny circles of flowers are there now and then. Dandelions and daffodils mostly. You could count them if Satoru was not driving so damn fast you think he is speeding.

He put your purse and phone in the back seat because, of course, he would want no distractions to stop you from paying attention to him.

He starts talking about how nice your dress looks and how happy he is to have you as his girlfriend.

You want to puke.

It would take at least two weeks for the smell to go away. He would have to clean it up because you would refuse to. Any damage done to his ego no matter how small is a win in your book.

You could picture it now. Satoru, long plastic gloves on his hands and wearing an apron, scrubbing the expensive carpet stained with bile and looking disgusted with you. Maybe he would give up on you then.

You almost laugh at the thought but decide against it when he starts talking with a smile that does not exactly reach his eyes.

*~*~*~*

He is tailing behind you like a grim reaper.

The black turtleneck he is wearing you suppose could count as a cloak. His face is white enough to be a skull, his hair helping you see it in your mind. All the expectations he has for you could be considered a guillotine’s blade that is ready to be let loose at any moment. Maybe a scythe. Don’t lose your head. That is what you keep telling yourself as you go down the aisles of sewn aprons and freshly baked bread and chickens wandering not too far off from the butcher’s cutting board. Don’t lose your head.

So, you keep walking to not be the victim of Satoru’s wrath.

“They’re so cute!” He exclaims, bending down to get a better look at the rabbits that are trapped within the confines of the barbed fence. “I just want to take one home! It would be like having another you around!”

His cooing makes you want to stab your eardrums out with the plastic fork you were given along with a free sample of chicken pot pie.

But you can’t ignore him either, he yearns for your responses like an addict.

“I’m not a rabbit.” You roll your eyes. Satoru responds by turning his head at you and then turning it again to make a visibly confused expression. “I’m a human. Not a pet. Not something to… lock up.” As his countenance turns somber and a hint of amusement lingers, the playful aura dissipates. Your breathing hastens, and your heart races. Perhaps voicing your thoughts was an ill-advised choice. Maybe an alternate utterance would have been wiser. Any alternative, for that expression, is one you wish to never witness again.

As you struggle to catch your breath, Satoru's steady grip on your shoulder brings a faint awareness to your hyperventilation. He calls out your name repeatedly, trying to reach through the haze of tears in your eyes. However, his words offer no solace or relief.

“Come on! Of course, you are.”

Maybe you will puke after all. But not on purpose like you originally intended.

His smile feels like a stab to the chest. Everything he does feels that way.

“...What do you mean?” What exactly does he have planned for you?

How far back do they go? Days, months, years, decades?

“You’ll see. You’ll like them, I know you will.” His hand clasps over your free one like a noose. “Either when you first know them or further down the line. I’ll be with you every step of the way no matter what you think. But just know I only have your best intentions at heart, okay? I can promise you that at least.”

“...Mmhmm. Let’s just… get moving.” Once again, you are off within a labyrinth of stalls.

You liked farmer’s markets during the warmer months, with your family and friends during school breaks and vacation times. Is that why he chose this place? Maybe. Maybe not. Maybe he also likes them. However, you cannot process the words Satoru and farmer’s market in the same sentence.

You pictured him bringing you to some nightclub and forcing you to dance under disco lights and loud music until you nearly faint from exhaustion. As much as you don’t want to admit it, maybe this is the better option.

You can’t imagine any other option. It could be worse. Those threats of his can easily become true, he could just lock you up in his penthouse and refuse to let you leave.

So, you don’t complain. You don’t want Satoru to get upset, even if you haven’t seen him that way.

“We’ll eventually move in together. Get married further down the line. Maybe have a kid or two, if we are really up to it, though I don’t mind if it is just the two of us.”

For once, you hope Satoru chooses his initial thought. You don’t want to bring any child into this hell.

“Romantic, right?”

“Uh-huh.”

His finger traces the bridge of your nose downward and the tip of it presses on its end.

“Boop!”

“Sigh…”

He does it again.

“So cute…”

“Let’s just continue.” You try so hard not to seethe. “I heard at this specific market they have good lentil soup. Focaccia too. Let’s go.”

He nods.

“Okay! We’re off!”

There is no escape, is there?

“It should be by the coffee stalls if I remember correctly.” You don’t get to finish because of course Satoru found a brand new interest to fixate on.

Aprons. Specifically, the pink lacy one that he is holding gently like a baby. “[First]! Look! You should wear it. It suits you!”

You shake your head immediately. To this, Satoru frowns. You’re hungry after being hauled around from stall to stall for the past hour or so. Can’t he understand that?

He holds the apron up closer to your face.

You turn away from it. Satoru only puts it closer. He really can be stubborn. That is what got you in this situation in the first place. As stubborn as you sometimes are, you can hardly compare to him. But that is with most things. 

Money, power, influence, he will always have more than you will, won’t he? Damn it. No escape. Not from him.

Not from him.

But you can try, can’t you? You can at least try. “Come on! It would look so cute on you.” You shake your head. His frown only deepens and he sighs.

Then he shoots you a look again. The look demanding of you to be good or else. The look that gets you to obey him every time he uses it. Every time he puts his foot down. 

Don’t lose your head.

Evade the blade.

“Good,” He says, handing you the apron with the smile you unsurprisingly prefer over the hellish expression he just showed you. “Go.”

You do.

Damn it. As long as Satoru keeps toying with you, you won’t ever be able to find peace. No escape. Damn it.

You slip the apron on as he watches, grinning like the Cheshire Cat.

[omiiomiaaus]

Toji’s music taste

headcanons

Headcanons on what songs or music i think toji would like but it’s really just what i like bc i’m lazy and don’t wanna look up new songs.

warnings: none??? some mentions of sex but no details, not proofread, literally none??

☆ Just gotta say one thing… this man was in his prime life in the 2000s…. He was listening to songs that are older than me 🥸

☆ okay Megumi canonically listens to weezer so i think he got some of his music taste from Toji. (i think almost everyone that develops a liking for rock gets it from childhood roadtrips with their dad)

☆ Toji only plays his music in the car.. he can’t stand the radio. …100% played buddy holly and meg picked up on it

☆ it’s mostly alternative and rock with the occasional hip/hop songs but he doesn’t really like new music, he’s an oldie after all

☆ he definitely listens to Coldplay oh my god i think that would probably be one of his favorite bands bc their songs are soft and helps him fall asleep (literally me)

☆ his favorite coldplay song is clocks bc he’s a little basic but it’s the most classic song like??

☆ he taps to the beat of any song on the steering wheel and only mouths the lyrics bc he doesn’t like his singing voice.

☆Toji and deftones >>>>>>> he definitely went to their concerts (his favorite songs are birthmark and rosemary)

☆ Is the type to act surprised when a good song comes on and put the volume on blast while saying “Oh shit” even though it’s his own playlists

☆ his gym playlist consists of heavy metal or rock songs that get him in the mood to use all his strength. (and some phonk songs bc he likes to pretend he’s in a movie but he’d never admit that.) so a lot of Metallica, Type O negative, Pantera, and Slipknot

☆ I GET MAJOR TOJI VIBES WHEN I LISTEN TO ‘I HATE EVERYTHING ABOUT YOU’ BY THREE DAYS GRACE!!!!!!!

☆ as for hip/hop he likes in da club by 50 cent and and without me by Eminem. those real 2000s vibe songs. none of the new stuff. He actually really does like Eminem.

☆ like??? 3am by Eminem just sounds like him… real villain shit

☆ he also really likes outcast. so fresh so clean is his songgggg. He holds his fist up like a fake mic and says “don’t you think i’m so sexy i’m just so fresh so clean” then holds it up to your lips for you to say “so fresh and so clean clean” and he won’t move his hand until you say it. also quotes “the coolest motherfuckers on the planet” randomly.

☆ he prefers r&b songs for his sex playlist. slow and sensual songs. and one joke song that he plays Russian roulette with when he presses shuffle. It absolutely kills your mood but he laughs his ass off when you’re in the middle of fucking and all of a sudden the speakers are blaring “you get the limo out front… hottest styles, every shoe, every color.”

☆ This mf got a Hanna Montana song from your nostalgia playlist and thought it would be funny to include in the sex playlist…

☆ Okay Toji is the type of guy to not play music in the shower bc he’s a psycho and just takes 3 minute showers (we all know he doesn’t wanna rack up that water bill) BUT when he does.. it’s a quick playlist filled with songs he doesn’t really like so he can hurry up and get out.

☆ Okay the songs I feel like he’d actually listen to are way different than songs for the vibes he gives off…

☆ He gives off major ‘she knows’ vibes by Ne-Yo, and it’s because of that one edit on tiktok… lord bless those editors for taking two second clips of Toji and making it something so scrumptious

☆ ‘monster’ by lady Gaga is another vibe bc “he ate my heart” that part reminds me of him for some reason… he can eat more than just my heart :)))))))

☆ also ‘lights down low’ by maejor and ‘no hands’ by waka flocka.. literally frat boy vibes but its so fanon him right???

☆ any phonk song reminds me of him because tell me he wouldn’t listen to that shit just to get in the zone????

☆ the lost soul down (specifically the sped up version) is just so himmmmmm <33… again it’s probably because of all the edits but still!!

☆ shine dreams (also the sped up version) idk who it’s by there’s so many versions lol but just any song like that >>>

☆ I also think of him when I listen to ‘level7’ by OSAKA… idk something about it…

That’s all I have for now :)

[tokkiiecloud]

Okay so My mc / oc Tae Hyun I realized you don’t know much about him expect for that one post of him, that was my first post so…Here this small post to talk about them!

CW! Panic attack mention, scars mention and Soft NSFW

Tae Hyun :

They are quite the calm and unfazed type of person, and when they came to hell well…it was okay?

It’s not like they haven’t met devils before you know? Because before they had transitioned to male they had also formed bonds with other seven deadly sins (Obey Me! Characters)

So when they notified Satan they already knew what to do he was both shocked and impressed. What an interesting person.

Also Tae Hyun is more than the MC he is actually one of my beloved oc’s with a very different personality then this one but I’ll explain it in another post if you guys want to hear the ‘true’ lore and powers.

Relationships (Kings, and fav characters ) :

First Minhyeok , they like him a lot, would 100% date him they know them the best and they both take care of each other. And plus they did a bunch of stuff they had their first kiss and first time together and live together as roommates/ fuck buddies(they do act like a couple a lot though)

Second Satan : They get along well and understand each other kind of. Tae Hyun’s rage is another type that blooms inside of their chest but they don’t let it out so it’s a new refreshing taste than bursting anger that Satan is used to.

Third Mammon, a big teddy bear man, hang out well and think he is cute, Tae Hyun is experienced in combat so they both protect each other in battle.

Fourth Leviathan, started to a rocky start. But after learning more about him and him learning more about them they somewhat started to get along and talk to each other more often than before.

Fifth Beelzebub, still feels quite uncomfortable around him but they started to loosen up around him just a little bit. Their first meeting in the selfie card really is something they’ll never forget not in a good way. (They get mad that he called them a ‘powerless kid that hell doesn’t need.’)

Sixth Belphegor, honestly, no particular feelings towards him. They appreciate spending time with him they can both cuddle and sleep together.

Seventh Lucifer, he helped checking over their surgery scars and also helps a lot when bad memories and panic attacks struck.

Bael, love the man, and takes care of him because they enjoy that, helps him with the workload as much as they can, contact Beelzebub to work and helps him release all of the pent frustration (ifykyk)

Foras, he is quiet like them but that doesn’t stop them from acting sweet and caring towards him. He appreciates all of the kind gestures from them.

Bathin, consideres him like a good friend, talks about their travels and discoveries or just things they enjoy.

Ppyong, Father son relationship Tae Hyun treats ppyong with all the kindness and love they think he serves as if he was they’re own child

The abilities of Tae Hyun :

Tae Hyun has a lot of experience when it comes to magic. They can summon a weapon which is most of the time their trusty whip,

Their voice is soft and can charm lower ranked angels, Michael tried to kill them over the fact that they look and sound angelic and also because they are a child of Solomon.

They can recreate universes formula, so kind of also knows they’re way around alchemy. (I’ll develop way more on that in another post to talk about the OC Tae Hyun.)

And also regenerate themselves but that’s against their will.

Extra infos :

Height : 169cm (idk how much ft that makes them)

Fav songs : Monster - Lady Gaga and Diet Mountain Dew - Lana del Rey.

Favorite foods : raspberry tart ; chocolate cake and strawberry shortcake. (They have a sweet tooth)

Age : 24 years old

Most likely to : steal people’s un-surpevised desserts.

Kinks : Dacryphilia(giving and receiving) ; size difference ; Praise (giving and receiving).

Sexuality : Bisexual

That’s it for now! I hope I said enough and explained well. And if you want more information just ask me! I’d be delighted to spill the entirety of his lore!

Woah woah, finally posting this here after posting this on both twitter and TikTok lol My WHB!Mc (trans f!m Demi-boy) They’re my little cutie

[dontatmethanks]

Hear me out, I totally picture that in the modern world Hange would be a little monster(Lady Gaga fan) and they would sing and dance to Lady Gaga songs in the middle of the night and grumpy neighbor Levi would report them to the landlord at least biweekly.

I wanted to write something for this because it was too good 😭 thank you anon and enjoy 💜

—

Noisy

He heard the music as soon as he stepped out of the shower, hair dripping onto his neck and shoulders while the steam cleared around him. It wasn’t wall vibrating or window shattering, but still a nuisance. It was late, he was exhausted from his earlier shift at the firehouse and he wasn’t looking forward to being disturbed from his sleep.

Hastily, he dried himself off and securely wrapped a towel around his waist, then hurried out of the bathroom and into his bedroom to search for a change of clothes.

His stupid neighbor wasn’t going to get away with it this time.

“ I asked my girlfriend if she'd seen you 'round before- oh yeah!

She mumbled something while we got down on the floor, baby

We might've fucked, not really sure, don’t quite recall- oh yeah!”

Scratch that about them not not being too loud, because now he had the misfortune of knowing what they were singing along to. Yes, it was loud enough that he could make out their voice aside from the music and his window wasn’t even open.

A flash of moment caught his eye, drawing his gaze over to said window. Unfortunately for him, his window had a direct view into the neighbor’s. Normally he’d keep his blinds drawn to avoid peeping, but in his haste earlier, it had slipped his mind to do so. His neighbor on the other hand, never bothered to do so, and to add insult to injury, their window was wide open.

Levi’s eyes narrowed, and he tossed the shirt in his hand onto his bed as he crossed the room to pry open his window and stick his head out.

“Oi!”

“ That boy is a monster!” The brunette belted over his shout, and to his horror spun out in front of their window.

In nothing but their underwear.

He jerked his head back inside and ran a hand down his reddening face.

What were they thinking prancing around half naked in front of an open window? Anyone could see, just why did it have to be him? It was fine, he just had to tell them to turn the music down then he could cover his window up.

“I wanna just dance, but he took me home instead

Uh-oh, there was a monster in my bed-“

The raven stuck his head back out and pressed his hand over his eyes before trying again.

“Turn that shit down!”

“-We french kissed on a subway train

He tore my clothes right off,”

Of course it was drowned out once again, only causing his annoyance to spike. With a low growl, he ripped his hand away to glare daggers at his neighbor who was now doing a shimmy and waving their hips around. The heat on his face rose a degree and trickled down his neck and chest. He hated the way his mouth went dry at the sight. He meant to turn away but he couldn’t bring himself to peel his eyes from their bronze skin and black sports bra.

“He ate my heart, heat ate my he-AHH!”

Finally, they had caught sight of Levi watching them with a squinted glare through the window during mid spin. Their face flashed so red he thought it might pop, then they dropped down onto the floor and out of his view before crawling over to shut the music off.

“Heyyyy, Levi.” They greeted him, poking their head up and over the window frame.

“…Good evening, Hange.”

Chuckling awkwardly, the brunette pushed themselves up and leaned out of the window a bit.

“Did you need something?“

The audacity.

Levi’s scowl deepened.

“For you to turn that shit down and go the fuck to sleep at a reasonable hour like the rest of humanity.” He replied flatly.

“Are you worried about my sleep schedule?” Their eyes widened dramatically as they placed a hand over their chest. “That’s very sweet of you Mr. Fireman.”

He groaned, then made a move to turn away from the window but Hange stopped him.

“Wait, wait!”

“It’s almost midnight, four-eyes, quit screeching.” He scolded, facing his neighbor once more. “And for fuck sake, we’re in the middle of November, put something on.”

“Well aren’t you a hypocrite,” They snickered and jerked their chin at his bare torso, eyeing it up shamelessly. “Or are firemen immune to colds?”

“Is everything that comes out of your mouth pure nonsense?” Levi scoffed.

Hange didn’t miss the way that the flush on his face deepened under their prying eyes. Their lips curled up into a mischievous smile.

“Say, Levi, does my bare skin make you nervous?” They cooed, voice dipping into a low husk that sparked something involuntary within him.

A sharp bout of laughter spilled from their lips when he recoiled and jerked back into his room. He slammed his window shut and by then they were doubled over and wheezing out of their window.

“Sweet dreams!”

He was still very red in the face as he drew the blinds and dressed himself. Hange pulled themself together and wiped their teary eyes before shutting their window as well. After getting dressed, they flashed a fond glance over at his window before pulling their blinds together.

—

The next morning, a noise complaint was slipped under their door, signed by the landlord himself.

“Motherfucker!-“ They shrieked, “That short-ass fucking garden gnome!”

Levi grinned from where he sat by his window sipping a fresh cup of tea.

-End-

[waywardimpalawriter]

Laundry Day (Bucky Barnes x Plus Size Female Reader)

Laundry Day

Pairing: Bucky Barnes x Plus Size Female Reader

Bucky Bingo Square: Domestic AU

Characters: Bucky Barnes,

Setting: two months from the ending of “Hey Bartender”, set in the Marvel universe but canon diverged the snap never happened.

Rating: M (Mature), +18 only please

Warnings: cursing, mature themes, angst, longing/yearning, idiots pining for one another,

Word count: 3,002

Summary: Sunday’s the dreaded laundry day when there’s not a stitch of clothing to wear except the man your currently crushing on, soft Henley shirt.

Notes: Bingo Square fill and written for the lovey @autumnleaves1991-blog​ and Write Wednesday prompt.

Tag list: @buckybingo​

You’ve heard it many time, how cool you own a bar. Can drink whenever you want. Let me drink for free. Last thought getting a snort from your lips while looking through the laundry pile. The main reason owning you a business sucked you never get a day off to do normal shit like the fucking laundry that seems to pile up before you know what’s happened. Wondering if like rabbits it multiples while mating.

Huffing out a resigned sigh, tossing the last article of dirty clothing back into the basket thankful you wouldn’t need to schlep the bags to a local laundromat. Instead could get a little light cleaning done while the built in laundry room, a big thank you too granddad for putting the room in, did at least part of the work.

“Fucking hate laundry day,” low growl leaving your lips and tugging on the only clean clothes left.

Hefting the plastic basket on to your generous hip, grabbing the towel off the bedroom doorknob to add and heading towards the small room just off the bathroom to the left. Dropping the basket down you go back out to put on some music. Grabbing up your cell phone happy to have brought large capacity storage so your whole collection could fit. Setting all of Lady Gaga’s music on shuffle ‘Monster’ flowing through the small speakers positioned around your living room in specific areas for optimal sound quality. Wide hips swaying to the beat black Henley brushing the tops of your thick thighs incased in shorts, knee high socks keeping the rest of your legs warm and helping you slide across the oak wood floors. Not caring what you look like at the moment, expecting no one to show up on an early Sunday morning.

Bright smile slides over your lips the song changing to ‘Born this way’ belting out the words thankful and not for the first time you don’t have neighbors. Owning the whole building does come with certain perks. Meaning it didn’t matter how loud you got no one would call the cops on you for excessive noise or lousy singing. With those thoughts in mind you head back to start sorting clothes getting a load going, grabbing the swiffers dust clothes, mop and bucket on your way out.

Leaving the last two by the kitchen island, spinning back body moving to the beat of the music. Picking up bits of trash making you frown for a moment, knowing you weren’t that messy but shrugging off the thought tossing the trash. Starting to dance around, straightening lamps, running the dust cloth over the expanse of hard wood furniture and nick knacks from your childhood. Getting into the rhythm, beat caressing your body, tingling your senses making you move in ways you wouldn’t show another living soul only these four walls.

Finishing up the living room, you stand back to catch a breath admiring your handing work when ‘Shallow’ starts to play. Bradly Cooper’s smooth tenor caressing your ears a soft sigh leaving your lips. Your body starts to move to the melody, slow and sensuous, arms wrapping around your tummy as you sway. Twirling as Lady Gaga’s voice takes over, stepping around the couch that faces towards the tv positioned in the middle of a brick wall. Bursting out to sing the chorus, you keep swaying picking the tempo up. Draping your body backwards over the couch careful not to knock a lamp off the side table. Grabbing up a remote to use as a makeshift microphone, singing your heart out to no one but the empty room or so you think.

Raising back up slowly to spin away still belting out the lyrics breathlessly, wide smile on your face happiness thumping through your veins. Feeling freer than you have in a long time all thanks to a song that comes to an end with loud clapping ringing through your apartment. Making you scream out and throw the remote towards the source of the nose. Squeak existing your breathless lips that hang open staring at Bucky Barnes’s imposing figure filling the doorway of your apartment.

Catching the black plastic wrapped remote in his flesh hand before it landed against his chest, smirk sliding over those oh so kissable lips. Not that you haven’t dreamt of at least a couple nights a week. “Fucking hell Barnes how long have you been standing there?” Quickly moving towards your phone to cut the music.

Turning to take in his rumpled appearance. Chestnut hair tucked back into a messy ponytail few wisps hanging out to frame his face. Sculpted by the finest artists all angles and edges begging for your lips to caress. That’s graced with shadows of a sleepless night of tossing and turning in a to soft bed and a floor too cold for comfort. Sold wall of muscle that is his shoulders and chest covered in a wrinkled green Henley top button open to bare just a hint of collarbone. You try not to lick dry lips at the peek of skin wanting to bury your nose in the hollow of his throat and nibble to see what sounds you could drag from those sinful lips. Snapping back to the present when he begins to speak before your wondering eyes could take in the bottom half of his fackable body. They lock with his for a moment longer than proper catching the dark circles and weariness he tries to hide behind that boyish smile.  

“Long enough,” clearing his throat to push down the arousal building up. In truth he tried knocking first, pounding followed with a couple of shouts of your name to accompany. Hearing the music spilling from behind the close door Bucky pulled the key you gave him last month out to let himself in.

Unprepared for the sight his eyes would land upon after pushing the old hard oak door open. Music hitting him square in the ears, not unpleasant a tune but a touch loud. However, that’s not what caught his eyes, no it’s the way you moved around the apartment to the melody. Body swaying, rolling and bending in ways that had him gritting his teeth to keep from stepping forward and pulling your soft body against his strong chest. Wanting to fill the spot of invisible partner, dipping you in his arms, wrapping them around your thick waist. Teasing the column of your throat with his lips after bending you backwards over his arm.

You’re a fucking temptation to his body and damnation to his heart and soul. One Bucky Barnes would gladly partake of if he didn’t feel so tainted, hands coated in invisible blood, mind splintered with nightmares of memories and lies. He wouldn’t saddle you with him as a burden. He’d push those feelings back bury them, accepting the friendship you offer and a shelter from a world he’s yet to fully grow accustom too.

Hands on your wide hips, scowl contorting your beautiful features, “I didn’t give you that key so you could barge in whenever you like Bucky.”

“I brought breakfast,” pointing towards the little white bags on the small wooden table by the door. Giving you the saddest puppy eyes he could which only makes you huff and roll your own.

Shaking your head, “You think you’re cute don’t ya Barnes?” Trying to infuse a touch of anger into your tone but it comes out more playful teasing than growling menace.

“Of course doll, you wouldn’t have me any other way,” wiggling his brow, scooping up the bags to follow you into the kitchen. Kicking something over he looks down teasing smirk slides over his lips before giving way to a playfully sheepish look, “Guess I finally kicked the bucket huh?”

Trying to hold back the laughter but it comes out on a snort that has a deep gruff laugh issuing from Bucky which in turn makes you giggle harder. Holding your stomach as it aches from the mirth lighting your features. Taking notice of the fact years have disappeared from the weariness he normally carries. Eyes sparkling in early morning sunlight shining in from the kitchen window. His beautiful steals your breath for a moment as you calm down, turning to start the Keurig, reaching for the pods of coffee you keep just for Bucky.

“Incorrigible Barnes, sit ya ass down while I make coffee,” couple of short giggles break free with another shake of your head.

Placing the bags down before dropping into his usual seat, “Two…”

“Spoonfuls of sugar no cream or milk I remember along with the dark roast that’s your favorite,” shooting him a smile. Grabbing your cell, changing the music to shuffle your whole library, turning the volume down so its more background noise than actually listening. “What brings you by this morning? Besides taking ten years off my life of course.”  

Snorting at your quip with trying to hide that he’s smitten by the fact you’ve memorized how he likes his coffee. “Hadn’t seen you in a week doll, thought I’d drop in with breakfast and see if you need help with anything down in the bar.”

Taking a few moments to actually looking over your plush frame. Big mistake because he notices how those shorts mold to your wide hips and thick thighs begging for attention. Knee high socks shouldn’t look so damn sexy but on you he’s shifting in his seat to take pressure off the erection building in his jeans. Eyes dancing to take in your upper half damn near choking on his own spit at seeing you wear his Henley. Stretched out with age and use from his days in hiding and a little thicker in build. The way it stretched over your lush breasts cupping the generous globes outlined for his eyes to devour. Flowing against your tummy he wouldn’t object to laying his head on while cuddling into your body. Wanting to place kisses and nibbles on the skin hidden from his widening cerulean eyes. Shocking him back to reality with you placing a steaming mug of coffee in front of him.

Palm going to his forehead, “Really doll, what exactly are you feeling for?” Glancing up to search your turned down face. Catching the soft scent of Egyptian musk, mixed with clean linen and something sweet added that he’s sure belongs solely to you.

“Seeing if you have a fever, you checked out on me there for a few moments Barnes,” gently pressing the pads of your fingers into his neck, counting a pulse and sending goosebumps to skitter across his body.

Taking the hand from his body, the urge to pull you into his lap strong with your warmth radiating into his. “I’m fine sweetheart honest just lost in thought of this beautiful dame I know.”

“Lucky woman,” slowly pulling your hand back tramping down on the hurt flashing through your body. Heading back to start your own coffee, “Make yourself at home as usual,” shaking your head watching Bucky toe off his biker boots and prop his mismatched sock feet into the closest chair. Rolling your eyes, “Way to comfortable,” exasperated quip leaving your mouth as you head back and change laundry over.

“What’s with the get up anyway?” Not wanting to shout, Bucky followed to lean against the door jam of the all to small room. Coffee mug hovering near his lips thankful for not taking a sip when you bent over to add cloths to the dry.

Plush ass on display for his eyes to map, flesh hand tightening around ceramic mug while vibranium plates whirl with a clinched fist at his side. Tempting isn’t even a word he’d use to describe the torture your presenting him with. Quickly averting his eyes to the ceiling, but not before catching the peek of silken looking skin his shirt bares while sliding up. Searching now for something to distract himself. Before he did a very stupid thing like pull you into his arms and see if you fit against him like he’s imagined one too many times. Burying his face in your neck and tease the tender skin with three days worth of beard wanting to see if you’re sensitive and ticklish.  

Brought back from those sexual thoughts when you speak, words tossed over your shoulder, “It’s all I had to wear, everything else needed washing. Price I pay for owning and running my own bar,” shrugging you bend to pick up the next load swearing you hear a groan from the man behind you. Yet when you turn he just gives you a smile that seems to make his cerulean eyes dance.

“Ah that explains why you’re wearing my shirt though not how you got it,” against better judgement, Bucky reaches out to tug the hem. Baring a briefest hint of cleavage to his desire darken eyes, with all three buttons open. He swallows harshly taking a bigger sip of his hot coffee than meaning to but the slight burning mouth pain distracts him from those thoughts that could get him into trouble. “I’m not complaining doll just curious if you’re stealing my clothes when you come over to my place.”

Snorting, “It’s not your shirt Barnes, your clothes wouldn’t fit my wide ass,” placing a hand on his shoulder to push him out the doorway. “If anything it’s from a pervious boyfriend and just stretched out.” Though you can’t help but glance down at the shirt racking your brain to remember who left it behind. Till you remember not having a boyfriend for the last couple of years and even then you didn’t let them keep stuff at your apartment. Only Bucky, who has his own key and drops by when he needs a break from the Compound and Avenging. Eyes widen in shock at the realization that in fact this shirt belongs to Bucky and must’ve got put in with your laundry one of the last times he stayed the night after a bad mission.

Deep in thought, you miss the low growl leave his throat at the mention of other men or the way he frowns when you insult yourself. “You have a gorgeous ass doll stop putting yourself down,” gently grabbing your upper arm to spin you around and face him. “And yes that is my shirt, there’s a stain,” swallowing hard but still brushes his fingers over the darken slightly yellow patch between your breasts. “Right here, it’s dripped mustard from a Coney dog about three weeks back remember. We went to Coney Island since you never went, sharing the cotton candy and almost getting sick,” soft chuckle leaving his parted lips. “You’re laughter at the corny shows, riding the Ferris wheel, I almost felt normal for once,” vibranium hand dropping back to his side, he heads to the table and plops down into his previous seat. Cursing his actions, head cradled in his hands hiding from his behavior and you. Wanting the earth to swallow him whole for his stupidity in voicing those words instead of keeping them bottled up. For touching you without asking permission, but God does he want a repeat and this time not let go.  

Frozen by his words, heart aching for how he still feels, the searing touch of those cool metal fingers, but most of all by the realization he remembered a day you hold dear to your heart. Eyes close for a moment to gather your thoughts, taking a deep breath and heading for your cooling coffee. “What’d you bring for breakfast?” distracting them both of you from the elephant in the room.  

Head popping up so quickly your sure he’s cracked his neck, half smile tugging at his lips, but not reaching his eyes, “Your favorites of course.” Reaching for the bags to pull out a small assortment of breakfast pastries.

“Trying to fatten me up Barnes?” You jest though back peddle at the scowl Bucky sends you. “Okay, okay I won’t do that again,” hands up in surrender but under your breath, “till your gone.”

Caught in mid sip, “You do know I have superior hearing right?”

“Your point Superman?” Bringing your mug with to sit down on Bucky’s left.

“I heard what you muttered,” grabbing the cream cheese kolache and taking a health bite while keeping eye contact with you.

Shrugging, “Then I’ll keep those thoughts to myself from now on,” picking out your favorite pastry to nibble on. “Oh and don’t worry I’ll get your shirt back to you once the rest of my clothes finish. I’m sorry it’s so stretched out.”

“One of these days doll,” muttering the rest to himself. Thoughts running through his mind on how much he’d like to bend you over his lap or better yet spread out for him to taste. Till you understood the beauty held in your countenance, the sway of your wide hips and plush body. Learning just what you do to his body and heat. But he knew those imagines held a deeper sway than you’d let anyone else see. Ones needing more than searing touches and intimate kisses but true actions to show you the truth.

Confident on the outside but tormented by dark thoughts and self doubts. That revelation skitters across Bucky’s mind like hot iron dunked into cool water, shocking his system to how similar though different as well, in ways he didn’t want to examine not yet. Registering the last comment Bucky looks up at you, tracing the features of your face, how your body looks in his shirt with golden sunlight bathing you in a warm halo. Speaking the words before his brain can shut them off, “Keep the shirt doll it looks so much better on you and by the way you didn’t stretch it out I did.” Flashing you his patent smirk before taking another drink of lukewarm coffee. Never so thankful for laundry day, stretched out shirts and the beauty sitting next to him.

[lover-of-skellies]

Song prompt with Connie?

Alrighty broseph, here ya go. I dunno if this really counts as horror, but hey. It's got angst at least, I guess

It's been a while since I've done any writing prompts like this, so I might be a little rusty ^^" gonna offer a tiny warning for nonconsensual kissing in the first part, and then character death toward the end

The song(s) that I used as prompts were "Bloody Mary" by Lady Gaga and "No Hero" by JT music

"Listen to me, Connie. Please. I'm not lying to you."

Conquest shook her head, her sockets wide in horror as she stared at the demon's outstretched hand. In his palm was a single black apple, and as he took one step closer to her, she took one step back. The demon let out a deep sigh, "Just eat the damn apple, will you? You desperately wanted everything to be perfect again, and this is how you'll get that. This apple will fix everything for you, all you have to do is eat it." Connie shook her head again, meeting his bright blue gaze, "No, I can't. I know what they really do, Othni. Retribution already told me about them, and I can't do this." Othni made a face, his tail flicking behind him in irritation, "Fine. Allow me to lend you a hand, then."

The rider stared at him in shock as he lifted the apple and took a bite of it. Before she even had the chance to run, brilliant blue magic pooled at her feet, and they felt as though they'd become rooted to the ground. Othni closed the distance between them, raising a clawed hand to firmly grip her jaw. As he leaned down, orange tinted tears began to prick at her sockets. The demon pressed his lips to her teeth and her sockets widened further. Conquest gripped his shoulders, her grip almost becoming painful as she squirmed and tried to push him away. His hand slid from her jaw to the back of her head, holding her in place, and she began to tremble, letting out a muffled sob as the chunk of black apple was pushed into her mouth.

Othni pulled back, narrowing his eyes at her when she refused to chew the mouthful of apple. He dug his claws into the back of her skull and she whimpered, still trembling as he hissed, "Eat it. If you don't start chewing, I'm going to break open your skull." She very hesitantly began to chew, visibly shaking as she watched the demon. Othni stared at her as she chewed, and when she stopped, he hummed, "Did you swallow it?" She nodded quietly, and his gaze hardened, "Prove it. Open your mouth so I can see that there's nothing in there." The rider opened her mouth as instructed and he peered inside, "...Good, it looks like you did. Now we can move on to bite number two." Her eye lights constricted in fear and she began to plead with him, "Please, don't make me do this! I don't want anymore! I don't want this, Othni, please st-"

He shoved the apple partially into her mouth, effectively silencing her. More blue magic gripped her wrists to keep her from resisting, and she shook as he covered her nose, murmuring lowly, "If you want to breathe, you'll start eating." Orange tears dripped down her face and she sobbed, sinking her teeth into the fruit.

Sleeping soundly in bed beside Geno, Death was oblivious to the shift in the atmosphere. There was an odd creak here and there, but the house was old, so the sound wasn't of any concern. Slowly stirring, Geno yawned and climbed out of bed, making his way to the kitchen for a glass of water. He grabbed a glass and held it under the sink, filling it halfway before shutting the water off. Turning to exit the kitchen with his drink, Geno froze, letting out a startled sound at the sight of a figure standing in the doorway. He drew in a shaky breath and tried to calm himself, "Death?... What are you doing out of bed? It's really late..." When there was no reply, he frowned, ".....Hello?"

A set of eyes opened, but only one golden-orange eye light could be seen. Recognizing the color, he furrowed his brow bones, ".....Connie? What are you-?" Behind her, a set of bright blue eyes opened, their owner noticeably taller than the rider. Geno took a slow step back, "Connie, what's going on?" Still shrouded by darkness behind Conquest, Othni purred, "I apologize, but she's not the Connie you knew... Not anymore, at least." Geno's frown deepened and he eyed the rider, setting his glass of water on the counter, "Connie, if you can hear me, I need you to say something." Finally responding, she let out a deep sigh, "What is there to say, Geno? You betrayed my trust and took Death from me, and that's that."

He blinked in surprise, "But... I thought things were ok with us now. What happened that changed that?" She tilted her head, her tone almost bored as a set of four tendrils sprouted from her back, "Nothing. I'm sick of having to talk to you every day, and just looking at you pisses me off. I should never have introduced you to Death." Geno stared at the tentacles in shock, unsure what to do. Othni hummed, "You should dispose of him before he tries to get in your way again. If you let him go, he'll only be a problem later on." Conquest made a sound in acknowledgment, "I know. I don't recall ever asking for your input though, Othni." The demon's content, vaguely amused expression shifted into one of confusion. What was going on? He'd done what he was supposed to, and he was told that she wouldn't give him any problems.

Geno swallowed the slowly forming lump in his false throat; Conquest was his friend. He had no idea what to do about her. He could try to fight her off, but he didn't want to hurt her. If he did too much damage, he could risk killing her. If she died, what was he supposed to tell Death? She began to walk toward him and he backed up. He could... Try to run, maybe? If he could wake up Death, then the situation might get back under control. As if Conquest could tell what he was thinking of doing, she hummed, her voice an octave or two lower than normal, "Don't tell me you're thinking of running from me, Geno. Surely I'm not THAT scary." Geno sputtered for a moment, trying to figure out what to say, "N-Nah, you're not scary. I just... Let me go get Death, and the two of you can-" "Don't." He yelped as a tentacle shot forward, curling around his neck. As he struggled to get free, she scowled, "I will face him when I'm ready. At the moment, I need to deal with you."

He stumbled over his words, desperately trying to breathe as the tendril tightened little by little. As Conquest stepped out into the light, Geno's socket widened and he froze. He took in her now goop covered form, the golden-orange tinted sludge covering one of her eyes. Atop her head sat a crown, likely the one that Retribution carried for a while. Her single eye light remained fixed on him and he shook; With the state she was in and the way she was looking at him, she gave 'fear' a whole new meaning. Conquest tilted her head in consideration, "Let's see... I could snap your neck. I could break your ribs and then shatter your soul though, too. Which one do you think I should do?"

Othni perked up, slinking across the kitchen and taking his place beside her, "I vote for whichever is more painful." Conquest slowly shifted her gaze and looked up at him, almost growling in annoyance, "Did I ask you, Othni? No. I was asking him. Bother me again and you'll be next." The demon was momentarily taken aback, "You can't be serious. As if you'd ever do that to me!" She narrowed her visible socket, a second tentacle coiling around his throat and squeezing, "Do you really want to test that theory right now? Because I'm getting tired of you always trying to worm your way into things that don't concern you." He growled, beginning to claw at the tendril, "I made you what you are, you stupid monster!" She glared at him, "Maybe so, but keep in mind, I told you NO. Now do us all a favor and fuck off before I actually kill you."

He fell silent and scowled at her, and she turned her attention back to Geno. In a last ditch effort to get free from her tendril's grasp, he relinquished control of his body, allowing Error to take over. The glitch immediately reached for his sockets and Connie arched a brow bone in amusement, a third tentacle catching his wrists with ease. Error glared and snarled, "Let me go, you disgusting anomaly!" She rolled her eye light, "How about no?" The black skeleton's body glitched, and in that split second, he slipped his hands out of her hold. His hands flew upward to his face and he produced a multitude of blue threads, which quickly ensnared the corrupted rider. She cried out in surprise, and then hissed, narrowing her socket again, "If you really want to fight, then so be it. That's all you worthless glitches understand, anyway."

The tentacle that held Othni suddenly snapped forward, and he yelped, finding himself sailing toward the glitch. Error's threads went to work and ensnared the demon as well, and he cursed, stepping aside as another tentacle shot toward him. He bound it in blue threads, his body jerking as the corrupted rider began hysterically sobbing, her speech incoherent. He furrowed his brow bones in confusion, and then froze as he noticed Death standing in the doorway, his eyes wide in shock as he took in the sight before him. The reaper glanced at Error, taking in his uninjured form and choosing to go to Conquest, who continued sobbing.

Death cautiously approached her, taking in her new appearance, "Connie? What happened to you?!" She shook her head and cried, "Othni forced me to eat a black apple, and I turned into this. I came here to see if you could help me, and then I got attacked by Error!" The reaper glanced in Error's direction again, "Error, you need to let go of her." Error frowned and hesitated, "I can't! She's lying, Death! I'm only fighting her because she attacked Geno first!" Death's voice gained a sharp edge that caused Error to flinch, "Error, I'm asking you to let her go. Fucking do it already! We need to make sure she's not hurt!" The glitch reluctantly loosened his threads, and the instant her tentacles were free, her sobbing came to an immediate halt. One tendril shot toward the glitch again, and Death's eyes widened as it broke through the glitch's ribs. Error's eyes widened as well, as he began to glitch, looking down at his hand and watching in fear as it began to slowly fade. Rather than dust, scattered zeros and ones floated around it, and Death immediately understood.

He looked at Connie, tears in his eyes as he grabbed her shoulders and shook her, "WHAT HAVE YOU DONE?!" The corrupted rider looked up at him, her eye light constricting as she burst into laughter. When he didn't receive an answer, he backed away from her, summoning his scythe. Her tentacles captured his arms and neck, tightening until his grip on the scythe loosened and it clattered to the floor. He was dragged back toward her as she stood, and she sighed, reaching out to touch his face, "I did what had to be done. You came along and stole my heart, and then you got me pregnant, decided after a little while that you didn't want me anymore. Then to top it off, you left me for Geno, who was my FRIEND. I tolerated the pain because I loved you, but as of right now, I'm done playing nice. You played games with me, so now it's my turn to play games with you." The reaper stared at her, sky blue tears beginning to drip down his face, "Connie... He didn't have to die. Neither of them did."

She hummed, "No, I don't think you understand. They DID. Now they're finally out of the way." He tried to blink back more tears, his voice soft, "...What do you want from me? What'll it take to make you stop?" All traces of her amusement vanished and her grip on his face tightened, "I'm glad you asked... I want some apologies from you for all the pain you caused me, and I want you to admit how pathetic and useless you are. As soon as you do those things for me, I'll do something for you." He furrowed his brow bones, "Like what?..." The corrupted rider offered him a twisted grin, the warped happiness not quite reaching her gaze, "Well, you always complained about not being able to die and experience reincarnation, so I plan to fix that little problem. You do what I asked, I kill you, and then I take over your team. It's as simple as that."

[fruitcoops]

#18 for Coops??🥰

Three different people asked for this prompt and I am happy to oblige. Hope you enjoy! Credit for Coops and the OCs goes to @lumosinlove

Prompt 18: “Can I sit in your lap?”

Dumo’s living room was unusually quiet. Kasey was fast asleep on the couch with his head in Natalie’s lap as she scrolled through her phone; on the carpet below them, the cubs had fallen asleep beneath a pile of kids. Remus smiled as Katie cuddled up against Leo’s broad chest. Lily and James had left hours earlier because Harry had a case of the sniffles that they simply had to be home for.

Celeste’s birthday party was the ultimate holiday, if Remus was being honest. Each group brought a dish for dinner as a gift and Celeste made a booklet of each recipe to add to her collection. My gift is seeing you all and sharing your food, she said every time someone tried to protest. This family is all I need.

She and Dumo were slow-dancing in the kitchen to the soft sound of the radio—Remus heard snippets of laughter and low French singing every few minutes. His life was chaotic and messy sometimes, but moments like this made it worthwhile tenfold.

“Bonjour.” The back of his armchair dipped as Sirius leaned over it.

Remus tilted his head back with a smile, accepting a quick kiss. “Hey, handsome.”

“I have a present for you.”

“It’s not my birthday.”

“What, you don’t want it?” Sirius held up a butterscotch cookie. “C’est dommage.”

“Ooh, gimme.” Remus craned his neck back further and opened his mouth; Sirius snorted, but stuck the cookie between his teeth. “Mmm, tank ya.”

“You’re welcome. Are we the last ones up?”

“Nat hasn’t looked up in twenty minutes and Olli’s been snoring for five, so pretty much.” Remus bit off a piece of his cookie and groaned. “Lily has to give me her recipe next time.”

“Baby, you don’t bake.”

“I will learn to make these.”

Sirius hummed and kissed his forehead, then his nose. “Can I sit on your lap?”

“ ‘course.” Remus straightened up and patted his thighs. “Much cozier than the floor.”

Sirius settled down with a slow sigh, slinging his legs over one of the armrests. “Love you.”

“Love you, too.” No matter how many times they said it, hearing him say those words never failed to thrill Remus. Sirius pulled another cookie out of his hoodie pocket and started munching away. “Hey, Cookie Monster, you’re getting crumbs on my legs.”

“…Cookie Monster?”

“Yeah, you know, the Sesame Street character?” Remus frowned. “Shit, you didn’t watch cartoons as a kid. Remember the Muppets?”

“From the Christmas movie with the jellybean rat?”

“Exactly. Cookie Monster is basically a huge blue Muppet who’s always going—” Remus lowered his voice and flapped his hands around in Sirius’ face. “Grrr, cookies!”

“Very impressive,” Sirius laughed.

“Thank you, thank you. Do I get a prize?”

He leaned in, closing the short distance between their lips for one, two, three kisses. He tasted like butterscotch and home. Remus hummed and wrapped his arms around his waist, pulling him closer. “Am I crushing you?” Sirius asked quietly.

“Never.” How is he always so warm? Remus was sure the two of them could be stuck in the Arctic and Sirius would still be a happy little space heater. Talker mumbled something in his sleep from where he was sprawled in front of the fireplace and Remus had to tuck his face into Sirius’ shoulder to muffle his snickering. “Sorry.”

A trail of feather-light kisses made their way from his ear to the junction of his neck and shoulder, where Remus could feel him smiling against his skin. “I love hearing you laugh.”

“Yeah?”

“Mmhmm. It’s like there’s a little hiccup before you start. Very cute.” Sirius bit down gently and Remus flicked him on the arm.

“Easy, tiger, Dumo and Celeste are a room away and we’re surrounded by our teammates. I don’t think Nat’s looking for a show tonight.” Despite his teasing, Remus angled his chin to give him room to work.

Natalie didn’t even glance up at them. “By all means carry on. I’m not sacrificing precious Instagram time to be pervy.”

“Thanks for the support. The gay community owes you so much.”

“Look out Lady Gaga, a new bi queen is coming for your title.”

“Hey,” Sirius said, working his way back up his neck and ending with a kiss to each eyelid. “Wanna head home?”

Remus turned on his saddest puppy eyes. “But my lap will get cold.”

“Not for long,” Sirius shot back with a cheeky wink. “I’ll say our goodbyes if you want to get the car running.”

“Hell yes, scoot over. Oh, and make sure you grab me some cookies for the road.”

[winchesterwords]

“You and I” John Winchester x F!Reader

Summary:  Set before the boys raid the vampire nest to get the colt, John visits you to get insight on which vamps have it. Owning a bar, you are a highway of information for the supernatural and an “old friend” of johns. How will he react around you while his sons meet you for the first time?

Word Count: 3753

Warning: Swearing, Alcohol, lil steamy moment

Song I Wrote To: “You and I” by Lady Gaga

Note: This is a bit canon divergence but I liked the concept. I’ve mentioned before that I don’t write smut, but I hope this lil steamy moment was okay. I don’t see enough John fics on here or ao3 so I wanted to do something. I wish we would have gotten more of his character. Tho i think that’s just cause I love JDM so much. 

-------

In the dark of a lone American road, a 67’ Impala rolled along the rain-slicked street. 

“You have that look on your face again,” Dean Winchester said, looking over at his brother. Sam turned to him, confused. 

“What look?” he asked. 

“The look that says you want to either punch Dad or punch him twice,” Dean said with a knowing glance. 

“I just don’t get why he won’t tell us where we’re going,” Sam said with a deep sigh as he stared at the taillights of their father’s truck ahead of them. “He just has to make everything so damn mysterious.” Dean laughed as his thumbs drummed on the steering wheel. 

“You’re just realizing that now, Sammy? Dad has always been like this, but he knows what he’s doing. Always does.” 

“I’m not so sure about that,” Sam grumbled and Dean rolled his eyes. In their search for the colt, they had gotten word that the break-in was perpetrated by a nest of vampires. The problem was, they weren’t sure where to start when it came to the bloodsuckers. Then, John had mentioned he knew someone who could give them a hand. That was all he said before jumping in his truck and telling his boys to follow him. Sam and Dean had done what they were told and revved the Impala’s engine, but now, Sam was getting restless. 

----

John Winchester drove with an eagerness.

He knew where he was going.  He had the route memorized no matter which direction he was coming from. You were the kind of woman that he couldn’t forget even if he tried. There was something about the way you didn’t take any bullshit when it came to anyone. Then there was the fact that you handled a sawed-off shotgun as well as any hunter he had ever met. John always liked keeping you to himself, his own personal getaway when things were getting a bit too dark for his tastes. 

However, unfortunately, this visit would not be a social one. He needed your help and he was running out of options to find the colt. If anyone knew where to find a vamp nest with a desire for a mystical gun, it would be you.

John hit the gas and sped down the road, keeping Sam and Dean in his rearview mirror. He was actually nervous for once. There was so much of his life that he kept private from his sons. Dean knew a bit more than Sam, but they didn’t know about you. They didn’t know about how you had saved his life twice or that you had asked him to stay with you on multiple occasions, but he couldn’t. You always understood that he had a mission to complete. Not just for Mary, but for his boys as well and you respected that even when all you wanted was a bit more time with the man, just as he did with you. 

Turning off the highway, John rolled into a town that seemed like coming home. Dean followed him through the winding streets as John drove straight for your bar. You had owned “The Iron Outpost” since before you had met the eldest Winchester. The entire building was lined with pure iron to keep unwanted spirits at bay. Not to mention the devil’s traps at both entrances and holy water you added to all the drinks.

You were pretty lenient with most supernaturals such as wolves, witches, even the odd vampire on occasion, but demons was where you drew the line. They never got past the door and if they tried, they would be met by you or your business partner, Dawn, who was also a hunter. The two of you had become an information highway for everything going on in the supernatural world and that was why the Winchesters were now at your doorstep. 

Parking in front of the Outpost, John got out of his truck just as his sons pulled in. Sam still looked annoyed as he got out of the Impala, but Dean just looked confused. “Alright, Dad,” Dean said, “what’s going on? Who is this secret contact of yours.”

“Never said she was a secret, Dean,” John said, “I just said you had never met her.” 

“She?” Sam asked. 

“She’s a hunter,” John said, nodding towards the front door. “Sort of.” 

Sam and Dean exchanged a look before following John into the bar. It was pretty crowded for a Tuesday night. The low hum of conversation rolled throughout the room as drinks were poured and food was served. Dean immediately spotted the odd charms that hung around the main entrance, as well as the warding symbols carved into the door frame.

There were two levels in the place and people milled about on both floors, smiling and drinking their fill. It was a typical place to find hunters and Dean immediately loved it. Sam was still a bit skeptical but remained optimistic that this place would offer answers. 

John searched the floor for you, but could only spot Dawn as she worked behind the bar, smiling at patrons. Moving further into the bar, John kept his eyes peeled for you. “Is she meeting us here?” Sam asked. 

“She owns the bar,” John said, turning to his youngest. “She should be around here somewhere…”

“Closer than you think, Winchester,” a voice came from above and John visibly relaxed as your voice reached him. Looking up at the balcony on the second floor, he finally spotted you. Grinning, you turned and jogged down the stairs. John’s eyes followed you as you approached him and the boys. 

“(Y/N),” he greeted with a smile. 

“Heya, Handsome,” you said as you walked up to him. “I’ve missed you,” you whispered as you leaned up and kissed him on the cheek. John smiled down at you, taking in your face as if he was trying to memorize it. “And I see you’ve brought guests,” you said, peering over his shoulder. Though, it didn’t take long for the pieces to fit together in your mind. “Or should I say, family.”

“(Y/N),” John said, “these are my boys, Sam and Dean,” he introduced, gesturing to each of his sons. You shook both of their hands, smiling. 

“Wow, John, you never mentioned how tall they were,” you said, looking at Sam with amusement in your eyes. The youngest Winchester chewed on the inside of his lip, awkwardly. Turning back to John, you sat into a single hip, crossing your arms. “What are you doin’ back in my neck of the woods?” you asked. 

“Need your help on something, (Y/N),” he said and you recognized his tone of voice immediately. This wasn’t going to be one of your more...entertaining visits. 

“What’s wrong?” you asked, giving him your full attention. 

“We may need a bit more privacy for this conversation,” he said, glancing around and you instantly understood. 

“That kind of ‘something’, huh?” John nodded, “Alright, boys. Why don’t you grab a seat and I’ll start closin’ up early. I’ll send Dawn over with a bottle,” you said. John reached out and squeezed your arm. 

“Thanks,” he said. You sent him a wink and then disappeared to start clearing out customers. John led his sons over to the table he always sat at when he came to visit. Shrugging out of his coat, he leaned back and watched as you spoke to Dawn across the bar, gesturing to the three men in the corner. 

“Dad?” Dean said, gaining John’s attention. “How exactly do you know her?” John sighed, running a hand over his face.

“I met her a few years ago,” John began, “I was on a hunt not too far from here. Some large-scale haunting and I hadn’t realized there was more than one ghost. These were nasty spirits. Salt slowed them down, but every time I turned around, three more would show up. I was being cornered by at least four of them and I was out of rounds when (Y/N) showed up and showered them in salt,” John chuckled slightly at the memory. “Woman was like Rambo with a salt grenade and then she hauled my ass out of there.” 

“So you got your ass handed to you by a chick?” Dean asked, amused. John shrugged. 

“Twice actually,” he continued. “She came with me to salt and burn the bones when a vamp came out of nowhere. Freshly turned one too. I’ve never seen anyone move that fast with a machete.”

“But I thought you said she wasn’t a hunter,” Sam said. 

“I said she was sort of a hunter,” John corrected. “(Y/N) hunts when she can. Mostly local things to keep her town safe, but she has other...talents. (Y/N) is connected in the world of the supernatural. She always knows what is going on within the monster world.”

“What? Like having Wolfman on speed dial?” Dean asked and Sam kicked him under the table. Dean threw a glare at his little brother, annoyed. 

“Kind of,” John said, “it’s complicated.” Dean pursed his lips but didn’t press the issue as Dawn arrived with a bottle of bourbon and four glasses. She dropped them on the table. “Thanks, Dawn,” John said. Dawn grinned at him. 

“Good to see you, John,” she said. “Things have been a bit boring around here since you left.” 

“You know me, D, gotta keep moving,” he said and she rolled her eyes. 

“Right,” she said with a knowing look. “Alright, you guys have a good night, I’m heading out.” Dawn nodded to the boys and then gripped John’s shoulder as she headed for the back, ready to have an early night. Dean poured the drinks and handed them out, pouring an extra one for you as you finished up sending people home. 

John sipped from his glass as he watched as you dragged a very drunk psychic from the bar. “It helps me see better!” the woman complained, trying to stay on her feet. 

“Then go buy a bottle at the liquor store, Shay,” you said, hauling her to the door. “I got shit to do!”

“You are going to have a hard life, (Y/N),” Shay said, pointing her finger at your face. Then, the psychic fell over, trying to reach the door. 

“Bet you didn’t see that coming,” you quipped as she stumbled out the door. With a final dismissal of the staff, the Outpost was finally quiet. After locking up, you joined the Winchesters, gratefully accepting the drink John handed you. “Alright, fill me in.”

“Wait,” Sam said before John could begin, “how do we know we can trust her?” Dean rolled his eyes and John narrowed his at his youngest. You, however, had expected this. 

“Something tells me you have questions, Sam Winchester,” you said, downing the bourbon. “Ask away.”

“How do you get your information about the supernaturals?” Sam asked. You reached for the bottle again and poured yourself another drink as you spoke. 

“I have my sources,” you explained. “Not all ‘monsters’ are bad, boys. There are wolves that eat cow hearts from the butcher and vamps that drink blood-bags instead of people. If you know which ones are the less horrible ones, you can make deals with them. Offer them protection from other hunters in exchange for information. I don’t deal in demons though,” you assured them. “However, I do know how to summon one if the situation is that dire. Which it rarely is in these parts. Psychics and witches are also easy to find and very easy to bribe once you get to know them.”

“So you run a black market for information?” Dean asked. 

“That’s one way to put it, sure,” you said with a shrug. “I find that monsters are more willing to speak to you than other hunters. I offer them a deal and they usually take it.”

“What deal?” asked Sam. 

“If they prove to me that they don’t kill people and offer good information, I keep them protected and keep their secret.” 

“And if they break the deal?” 

“Then I kill them,” you said simply. 

“Just like that?” asked Dean. 

“Just like that, Dean,” you said. “Satisfied?” Dean hesitated before nodding. You looked at Sam and he did the same. 

“She’s good, boys,” John said and you smiled at him, gripping his shoulder. 

“So,” you began, “tell me what you need.” John turned fully towards you and you could see that he was exhausted. You weren’t sure when the last time he slept was. Then again, you hadn’t seen the man for months. A hundred different things could have happened since then. 

“We’re looking for the colt,” John said and your brows shot up. 

“As in Samuel Colt?” you asked.

“You know it?” he asked. 

“I do, but nobody knows where it is.”

“We did,” Dean interjected. “Another hunter, Daniel Elkins, had it, but it was stolen.” 

“By vamps, (Y/N),” John said. 

“What would vampires want with a gun like that?” you asked, confused. Everyone that knew about the supernatural was aware of the gun. It was legendary, but most people thought it was just a fable, a myth to tell monsters so they would be scared. You never imagined that someone you knew would be after it.

“We don’t know,” John said, “but we need it.” You sighed, placing your drink down. 

“I can ask some of my contacts, but I can’t make any promises. And as soon as I do, people, monsters, spirits, you name it, they’re all gonna know the Winchesters are after it.”

“We’re out of options, (Y/N),” he said. 

“I’ll do my best,” you said. 

“Aren’t you gonna ask why we need it?” Dean asked. 

“Not my business,” you said. “When you’re in the business in making deals and keeping secrets, you tend to learn to not ask questions. Excuse me,” you said as you got up and headed for your office upstairs. The three men watched after you. 

As soon as the door to your office shut, John turned to his sons. “Really? Did you have to interview her like a suspect?” He didn’t wait for them to answer as he got up and followed after you. 

“How well do you think they actually know each other?” Sam asked, watching after his father. 

“You don’t think…?” said Dean and then he cringed. “Not an image I needed, Sammy. Not at all.”

-------

Slipping into your office, John shut the door softly behind him. 

“Your boys are a lot like you,” you said from your desk as you texted away on your cell phone. John walked around the room as he looked at all the memorabilia you had from various hunts and adventures. Some he had even joined you on. When his eyes fell on the leather couch in the corner, he couldn’t keep the smirk off his face. 

“Sam is like me,” John eventually said, “but Dean is more like his mother.” John turned and walked back to you as you set your phone down and walked around to lean against the desk. John met you there. You reached out and ran your hands up his chest and then over his shoulders. 

“You look tired,” you said softly, looking into his hazel eyes that stared back at you through thick lashes.

“So do you,” he pointed out. You shrugged. 

“It can be hard in my line of work. Never know when someone is going to need me up at three in the morning.” John nodded as his hands slid around your waist under your shirt, his large hands gripping you tighter. His thumbs rubbed along your skin. “I was hoping you’d visit soon,” you said quietly. 

“I’m sorry it took me so long,” he said, stepping closer between your legs. 

“I heard you mention the haunting we first worked,” you said as your hands crept up his neck and into his hair. 

“It was a tough one,” John said. “I should have done my research and of course, listened to the local bartender who told me the history of the place.”

“Yeah, probably would have helped,” you said with a grin. 

“You know,” John said, leaning forward to trail his lips along your jaw ever so slightly. “I never did thank you for saving me that night.” Your eyes fluttered closed as he nipped at your ear, your hands tightening in his hair.

“I remember you did,” you breathed out. 

“Oh?” John asked, innocently. Pulling back, he looked down at you with lustful eyes. “Would you mind reminding me?” With a hard tug, your lips met his and he grabbed your hips, placing you on the desk. 

John kissed you hard as he tried to make up for all the time lost between the two of you. You gripped him tightly, letting him take control. His hands moved from your waist to your hips and then your thighs as he took charge of your body. 

Sliding your hands from his hair to his waist, you ran them up his stomach beneath his shirt, feeling his hard chest beneath your fingers. John pressed in closer, gripping the back of your neck to tilt your head back for better access. When he parted your lips, a small groan echoed from your throat which only made him more eager.

There was nothing better than kissing John Winchester. He was the only man to ever make you feel like this and the second he walked out of your bar, you craved him until he returned. 

Your nails raked down his back as he let go of your lips and moved to your jaw and then down to your throat. Leaning back on the desk, you let him mark you, feeling electricity flow through your veins. You gasped as he bit down just above your collarbone. Keeping one hand on your neck, he used the other to grip your thigh. Your leg came up and between his legs. John pressed his body against yours harder at the movement. 

You were flush against him, feeling his body fit perfectly against your own. He dragged his teeth along your throat, eliciting another moan from your mouth. “You’re gonna cause trouble if you keep doing that,” he whispered against your skin. “Not that I’m complaining,” he said as he lay you back on the desk, running his hands along your body as he leaned over you. 

“Don’t be a tease,” you warned as he grinned, wrapping your leg around his waist. 

“Wouldn’t dream of it,” he said with a smirk as he trailed a finger across your chest.

 “John,” you breathed out as he moved back to your lips, swallowing your whispers. 

Just as his hand began to move towards the waistband of your jeans, your phone rang. 

“Fuck,” you groaned as he paused. Detangling yourself from his body, you slid off the desk and grabbed your phone. John stood back, trying to control his breathing as he smoothed down his shirt. You fussed with your own clothes as you picked up the call. 

John didn’t listen as you spoke to whatever contact you had reached out to. Instead, he tried to come down from the high he had just experienced in that small moment with you. He had almost forgotten what it had felt like to have you in his arms, to feel you respond to his touch. His heart jumped in anticipation at the thought of having the opportunity again, he knew it was unlikely. They still had a job to do. 

“You’re in luck,” you said, grabbing his attention as you pocketed your phone. John turned to you. You wiped at your mouth with the back of your hand and smoothed your hair. “I have the location.”

-----

Once the two of you had made sure you didn’t look like horny teenagers, you rejoined Sam and Dean. 

“I got it,” John said, raising a piece of paper in his hand. Your vampire contact, a nomad who you had crossed paths with occasionally had heard about two humans who had been taken by a nest. A nest that was gloating about getting the jump on some guy named Elkins.

“Just like that?” Dean asked. 

“I told you,” John said, “she’s good.” Sam still looked skeptical, but Dean seemed to be alright with how things turned out. 

“Do you guys need anything else?” you asked, trying not to let the sadness on your face show. You knew he had to leave now and you weren’t sure when you would see him again.

“We’re good,” John said softly and you nodded, crossing your arms. 

“Well, don’t any of you be a stranger, okay?” you said. “And for god’s sake be careful so I don’t have to hunt you down cause you got turned.” 

“We’ll do our best,” John said with a longing look that Dean caught immediately. 

“We’ll meet you outside, Dad,” Dean said as he grabbed his brother’s jacket. “It was nice meeting you, (Y/N),” he said and you nodded back to the both of them. As soon as the door closed behind them, you grabbed John’s arm. 

“You’re going after it, aren’t you?” you asked. “The demon. That’s what the colt’s for.” John grimaced and you sighed. He had told you about the yellow-eyed demon the second time he had come to see you. To most people, a conversation like that would seem like bad pillow talk, but it was normal for the two of you. 

“You know I have to,” he said, reaching for you. His hand came up to hold the side of your face. 

“I know,” you said. “He’s not gonna know what hit him when John Winchester shows up with Samuel Colt’s gun on his hip,” you said as you pulled him closer, your hand resting on the place his gun normally sat. You pulled his lips to yours and you kissed him fiercely. He melted into the kiss and you felt as if this was finally goodbye. You didn’t know why, but something about the way you held each other spoke volumes. 

Pulling back, you looked right in his eyes and tried to memorize those beautiful hazel irises. “(Y/N), you are...it’s been you for so long,” he whispered and you fought back tears. You kissed him once more, letting your lips linger for just a few seconds before letting go again. 

“Go get the bastard,” you said. John smiled at you. 

“Yes, Ma’am.” 

[platonicteenwolf]

Wolf Moon (S1E1) Part IV

Teen Wolf x Reader Series Rewrite

A/N: Hey! Thank you all for the positive feedback! Sorry the schedule has been so slow, I’ve just recently started my last year of school so there’s a lot going on for me. I appreciate all of your patience!

They/Them Pronouns Version

He/Him Pronouns Version

Next Part / Masterlist

Warnings: none

Scott comes out of the bathroom with a towel wrapped around his waist when someone walks into his room.

“Is this a party or a date?”

Scott jumps, startled. His Mom has the car keys held out in her hand.

“Maybe both.”

He reaches for the keys, but she pulls back.

“And her name is?”

“Allison.”

She hands him the keys.

“We don’t need to have a talk do we?”

“Mom, I’m not having the safe sex talk with you.”

“Oh, oh my god, no I meant about keeping the tank full. Give me those back.”

“Are you serious?”

“You bet your ass I’m serious. I am not going to be on some reality show with a sixteen year-old pregnant girl.”

—————

Scott pulls up to the curb outside Allison’s house. Drumming his fingers on the steering wheel in anticipation, the front door of the house opens and Allison steps out. Looking absolutely stunning under the glow of the streetlights, she approaches the car while pushing a strand of hair from her eyes.

Suddenly realizing he’s still in the car with his mouth hanging open, Scott scrambles to get out and open the door for her.

Driving, Scott and Allison sit in silence. Absolute and agonizing silence.

“Is it okay if I turn on the radio?”

“Uh, yes. But you can’t,” she gives him a confused look as he continues, “Sorry, it’s broken. We’ve been meaning to get it fixed.”

“No worries. You mind if I put on some music anyways?”

Now it’s Scott’s turn to give a confused look. But Allison has her phone out. She turns the volume up and puts it on speaker.

“Nice taste in music.”

“What? You think all girls listen to is Lady Gaga?”

“I listen to Lady Gaga,” Scott mutters.

She does a double take. He’s serious. And she laughs.

“So do I.”

She puts her hand over his on the middle console, their fingers intertwining. Scott tries to hide his smile to play it cool. But he can’t. For just a moment, everything is absolutely perfect.

—————

Teenagers jam the outside of the house by the pool. Some already drunk, some high. Scott and Allison walk through the crowd. But Scott pauses when he hears a dog barking. A huge Rottweiler in the yard next door just beyond a chain link fence. And it’s barking at Derek.

He stands behind the fire pit, staring straight at Scott. But then he shoots a look at the Rottweiler. The dog stops barking instantly. Eyes locked on the animal, Derek gives an almost imperceptible nod. Tail between its legs, the Rottweiler submissively lowers to a sitting position. Satisfied, Derek turns back to a surprised Scott.

“You okay?” Allison asks.

“What? Oh... Yeah. Fine.”

When he looks back, Derek is gone. Movement catches his eye and he glances up to the roof of the pool house where a shadowy figure seems to disappear just past the chimney. Scott steps back, trying to see if he actually did just witness Derek leaping twenty feet off the ground. But there’s nothing there.

Allison then holds her hand out to Scott. Letting his fear go, he takes her hand with a smile. In the crowd, they start dancing. As they come closer and closer, as Allison starts to smile back at him, the usually timid Scott begins to let go.

His hands reach around her waist with the other teens pushing them closer. Bodies pressed against each other, her cheek brushes lightly against his.

Then through the crowd, Scott notices Lydia dancing with Jackson, grinding close to him, her fingers wrapped around the back of his neck. She presses her lips to Jackson’s locking him in a passionate kiss. As he eagerly kisses her back, sliding his hands down past her waist, Lydia opens her eyes and looks right at Scott.

Staring at him as Jackson goes at her neck. Unused to the attention of one beautiful girl, much less two, Scott finds himself dumbstruck until the bodies of the dancing teens push together to leave him alone with Allison again.

As Scott peers into her eyes, he realizes they’re about to kiss. Then the music begins driving almost like the quickening of a heartbeat. Scott’s heartbeat. The sounds around him intensify. His fingers clench back, veins at the surface of his hands as he presses against the fabric of Allison’s shirt. His upper lip pulls up momentarily to reveal a sharpened incisor.

Lights glaring in his eyes, Scott’s breathing tightens, sweat at his temples. He steps back, pulling away from her.

“Sorry... I... I’ll be right back.”

“Are you okay?” She asks for the second time tonight.

But he hurries past her and into the house.

—————

“Yo, Scott, you good?”

Hearing Stiles’s voice I look over and see Scott stumbling through the house, hand holding his head in pain.

As he makes his way towards where I’m at by the bathroom I try to get his attention.

“Scott? You all right?”

But he doesn’t answer, continuing to push through the crowd. I look towards Stiles searching for an explanation but all I got was a worried look. Is this the full moon? Is Scott about to turn into a werewolf?

—————

Finally, shoving past everyone, Scott charges out the front door. When he turns the corner, he glances up to the sky where the full moon shines brilliantly in the night.

Gasps now starting to sound like animalistic growls, he reaches his mother’s car. Just getting the keys from his pocket seems an almost colossal effort.

A second later, the car tears away from the curb as Allison comes out of Lydia’s house, looking around. No idea where Scott is.

“Allison.” She turns to see Derek coming toward her.

“I’m a friend of Scott’s. My name’s Derek.” He steps under the street light his deep black eyes, strangely hypnotic.

—————

Scott stumbles into his darkened bedroom, slamming the door shut and flipping the lock. Sweat at his brow, Scott charges into the bathroom. He flips the cold water knob on the shower, letting it pour over him. And then he notices something... his fingernails. Seeming to tear free, bone-like claws pushing them out from the tips.

Terrified, he stumbles out and to the mirror where he wipes away the steam to reveal rapidly growing fangs and two glowing, yellow eyes staring back at him.

—————

I stand in the upstairs hallway of the McCall house as Stiles pounds on the door of Scott’s room.

“Scott, it’s me.”

“Go away!”

Scott voice was laced with panic. I could only imagine what was going on out there. Footsteps could be heard inside the room and suddenly Scott had unlocked the door but only allowed it to open an inch.

“Scott, let us in,” Stiles urges.

“Come on dude we can help! Whatever it is.”

“No!” Eyes burning yellow, he stays hidden behind the door, face shrouded in darkness as Stiles tries to peer through.

“Listen, you have to find Allison.”

Remember seeing her when Stiles and I were running out of the house I reassure Scott, “She’s fine. I saw her get a ride. She’s totally fine.”

“No, I think I know who it is.” I could hear the pain in his voice as he continued talking.

I know Stiles could hear it too because he kept pushing the door open harder.

“Just let us and we can talk.”

“It’s Derek. Derek Hale’s the werewolf. He’s the one who bit me. He’s the one who killed the girl in the woods.”

Wait- Derek? But he’s.. “Scott... Derek’s the one who drove Allison from the party,” I say.

The weight of realization falling on him, Scott slams the door shut, locking it.

Realizing he can’t get in Stiles starts to bang on the door more urgently.

“Scott! Scott, wait--“

—————

Through the open bedroom window, Scott launches himself out from the second story. The full moon looming in the sky behind him, his hands slam down on the wet pavement.

Now, Scott’s crouched figure slowly draws up to reveal he’s no longer struggling against the transformation. He’s given into it.

Not a hulking beast but a leaner, more human monster. Both powerfully muscular and strangely seductive with gleaming yellow eyes, incisors reformed into fangs, ears tapered to points over thickened, wilder hair and fingernails grown to razor sharp claws.

The sixteen year-old boy is gone. Scott is now a werewolf, charging down the driveway and then suddenly up, leaping to the branch of one tree, hurtling to the next and then finally into the dark of the woods. In search of Allison and the danger she faces.

—————

Down winding roads and through twisting paths, flashes of moonlight briefly illuminate the outline of a figure moving impossibly fast.

At the tree-shrouded entrance to the Beacon Hills Preserve, Derek’s black Dodge Challenger sits in the parking lot.

Scott leaps down, landing right on the roof of the car. He peers through the windshield to see the vehicle is empty and then leaps off in search of its owner.

Charging out from the shadows, Scott lands on a moonlit fallen tree. Clawed hands resting on the dead trunk, his breath comes out in steamy gasps. His crouched and silhouetted body twists around, trying to catch a scent in the air.

—————

Stiles’s jeep skids to a halt just outside Allison’s darkened house. A second later, he’s scrambled out of the drivers seat and heading towards the steps to ringing the bell as I follow in hot pursuit.

Stiles‘ pounding on the door, finally stops when lights come on inside. The door clicks open and Mrs. Argent looks at us, confused.

“Hi,” Stiles starts, “We’re friends of Allison’s and this is going to sound kind of crazy. Actually really crazy. Actually crazy doesn’t even begin to--“

As his rambling continues on I cut him off to explain. “We’re looking for Allison.”

After giving me a warm smile, Mrs. Argent turns back inside and calls Allison from her room.

Stiles opens his mouth to speak again but then stops, Allison walks out of her room facing us from the banister. Wait, so if she’s fine then...

As a distant howl can be heard, Stiles and I turns to the sound, a look of understanding shared between us. It’s not Allison Derek was after.

It’s Scott.

—————

Racing into a clearing, Scott slows, looking up to find an unexpected and very strange sight-- a jacket.

It’s Allison’s. The jacket she was wearing at the party, now used to lure him here.

Something moves in the shadows. Scott whirls around, launching himself up as Derek comes out of the darkness and drags him back to the ground. They almost look like dogs grappling as they go up and then slam back down to the leaves and brush below them.

Derek holds him down, one hand wrapped around Scott’s throat. He’s unchanged in the full moon, except for a strange blue tint to his eyes.

“Where is she?” Scott’s voice is deeper, strangely demonic.

“She’s safe. From you.”

“What did you do?“

“Quiet,” His voice comes like a knife into Scott’s head, making him wince. Derek glances up to the woods around them, listening. “It’s too late.”

Scott’s yellow eyes flick left and right as if he senses something else in the woods as well.

“They’re already here,” Derek turns back to Scott, a hint of fear in his eyes. “Run.”

A second later Derek is on his feet, moving so fast he’s almost a blur. Scott barely has time to react when something comes soaring out of the darkness.

An arrow lands in the trunk of a nearby tree. The bolt explodes with a brilliant flash. Scott stumbles back, yellow eyes blinking furiously. Something about the flash has perfectly compromised his vision. When he looks up, Derek is gone. In his place, three figures emerge from the shadows. Silhouettes at first, they approach with purpose.

They look like hunters. One carries a Remington pistol grip shotgun. Another chambers a round in a Glock 21 handgun. The third and obvious leader of the pack, wields a much stranger weapon, a crossbow. Steel-tipped bolt pulled back and ready to fire.

Practically blinded, Scott can barely see a thing. Until his eyes focus on the determined face of the Leader, raising the crossbow to fire again. Scott tries to turn and run, but the arrow soars, tearing through the darkness and right into Scott’s forearm, pinning it to a tree.

As Scott howls in pain, the leader lowers the crossbow, allowing himself the slightest of satisfied smiles. Turning towards the other hunters he orders,

“Take him...”

The first Hunter comes forward, but then a large figure comes barreling towards him. Clawed hands grab the first Hunter by the back of his jacket and hurl him into the air, easily tossing him into the second Hunter.

The Leader retreats back, calmly and quickly redrawing his crossbow as Derek tears out of the shadows toward Scott. In one swift motion he snaps the shaft of the arrow in Scott’s arm and pulls him free.

“Go!” Derek shouts.

Scott charges forward, racing out of the clearing and back into the woods with Derek right behind him.

A shotgun blast fires just over their heads followed by a volley of gunfire.

“Faster!”

But Scott eventually slows and underneath his damp hair, his face has returned to normal. He’s back in human form. He staggers to a stop in the woods, gasping for breath.

When he looks up, Derek steps out of the darkness to face him. He doesn’t breathe hard at all, seemingly in perfect control of his abilities.

“Who were they?”

“Hunters. The kind who’ve been hunting us for centuries.”

Suddenly, the severity of the situation hits Scott. His anger level spikes as he realizes this is all Derek’s doing. “Us? You mean you. You did this to me!”

“Is it that bad, Scott? That you can see better, hear more clearly, move faster than any human could ever hope? You’ve been given something most people would kill for. The bite is a gift.”

“I don’t want it.”

“You will. And you’re going to need me if you want to learn to control it. You and me Scott. We’re brothers now.”

—————

The morning sun beating down on an empty tree-shrouded road. As Stiles and I drive down the highway, I notice Scott walking down the middle of the street.

Rolling down the window, I call his name, trying to get his attention.

“Scott? Are you okay? We’ve been driving all over looking for you.”

Exhausted, Scott slowly turns towards us as Stiles slows down next to him.

“You guys were right. About all of it.” As I clamber into the back-seat so Scott can sit in the front, Stiles tosses a jacket towards the wolf since he’s still only clad in pajamas. “You know what actually worries me most?”

Stiles scoffs and turns towards his best friend, briefly taking his eyes off the road.

“If you say Allison, I’m going to punch you in the head.”

“She probably hates me now,” Scott retorts.

Looking up at Scott from where I’m sitting in the back, I could tell he genuinely cared for this girl.

“I doubt she hates you dude. You should probably apologize though for ditching her the other night and come up with an explanation why.”

Butting in, Stiles adds on to my suggestion.

“Yeah or just tell her the truth and revel in the awesomeness of the fact that you’re a freaking werewolf.” Scott gives him a sideways glare, head still hanging low with disdain. “Okay, bad idea. We’ll get through this. If I have to, I’ll chain you up myself on full moon nights and feed you live mice. I had a boa once. I can do it.”

And finally, the tiniest smile is coaxed out of Scott.

—————

Waiting on a bench outside school, Scott jumps to his feet when he sees Allison come out the double doors.

“What happened to you last night? You left me stranded at the party.”

“I know and I’m sorry. I really am. But just trust me on this... I had a really good reason.”

“Did you get sick?”

“I definitely had an attack of something.”

Exasperated with his lack of answers, Allison asks, “Am I going to get an explanation?”

“For now... could you find it in your heart to just trust me?”

“Am I going to regret this?”

“Probably.” Scott takes a steps closer to her. “So are we agreeing on yes to a second chance?”

“Definitely yes.”

Then, just as it looks like they’re about to kiss, a horn beeps. An SUV pulling up to the front of the school.

“That’s my Dad,” Allison explains, “I better go.”

Scott nods, turning to head back. But then he pauses, head tilting up with an intake of breath. He’s caught a familiar scent. Glancing back, he sees Allison’s father. The face is instantly recognizable. It’s the man with the crossbow. The leader of the hunters.

He throws Scott a friendly smile, clearly not recognizing the boy as his prey from last night.

With the full weight of realization hitting Scott, the father of the girl he loves is also now his sworn enemy, his face clouds with dread, darkness surrounding him.

END OF EP 1

—————

Tag List: @linkpk88 @mochminnie @im-a-stranger-thing

[dathen]

TMA 166 Liveblog Dump

I finally got through an episode without my twitter getting locked for spam good for me

OH GOOD THEY'RE GONNA TALK ABOUT THE THING

Domain of the Buried oh I was not expecting that

"look down" and then helen shows up IS SHE PUTTING HER DOORS ON THE FLOOR..

I wish Martin had wanted to talk about the Implications of Jon killing vs. the "how"....like...does the "how" matter..?  everything is fairy tale logic

Helen trying to put Jon at the same level as Elias for having a difficult time describing stuff >:|  fucking helen

oooh this is GOOD LORE though Helen describing herself as a manifestation on par with the Not!Sasha is EXACTLY what my theory was (vs. a Helen-the-person becoming a formerly-person avatar)

Jon being able to shift someone from being The Feared to The Afraid [eye emojis] I am dying for this to happen to Jonah I am DYING

"I don't see why you were being so coy about it--" "Because I'm ashamed, Martin!"  Jonnnnn ;;;A;;; Also said in the EXACT same delivery as "because I'm afraid, Martin!"

hhhh this Martin characterization is exactly what I felt was the context of the end of 165; he's so used to being in a position of powerlessness and having to play these dangerous games to stay safe, power is EXCITING

it's weird to hear the words "go full Kill Bill" and "get our murder" on coming from his mouth, but the idea of him supporting Jon in avenging himself on those who hurt him and killing the torturers of the new world is..not as surprising to me as it could be

(I hate that this conversation is happening in front of Helen though.  Helen is the one of the worst influences I could come up with for either of them right now, and I genuinely expect some level of spying/sabotage from that direction if they're too open)

[presses face to glass]  Martin honey you've been doing great with relationship stuff so far and this is probably your first one but you might have not learned the "have delicate arguments in privacy and security with boundaries vs in front of a Monster Jury" bittttt

I think Martin realized he fucked up a bit, his voice gets so soft asking if Jon needs anything after Helen leaves ._. 

I can't get over Jon's ramble about why he's ashamed that he still blames himself for this, and hates that he has less pain and more freedom than those he considers more innocent, and even hates that he has the power to defend himself now. I'm SO SAD but I love him so much

once again I get where both of them are coming from; Jon feels it's WRONG that he's not suffering and can kill things that try to hurt him or Martin while Martin sees Jon as a victim regaining agency Jon is back to being eight years old and blaming himself for escaping Mr Spider

oh man oh man this buried statement coming after Jon's confession of shame and guilt  "He never knew something that could be called freedom, even if he had choice" That sums up so much for these characters from the moment they started working in the Archive

"while his feet could turn left, only turning right let him scrape out a meager living"  I REALLY love the explorations of the tyranny of poverty this season; with the show as a whole working as an effective metaphor for capitalism, it makes me wonder what the ending message is

this statement is a jon metaphor all the way through  "If it moves like a worm and thinks like a worm.." for the self-dehumanization of the victim compare to "if it lives like a monster and feeds like a monster" for him

(I'm having a little ADHD trouble following statements this season--I think it's because they're less of a personal story format)

"forces of paper and ink and decimal points" go OFF

hhhhh this also feels like a parallel to how Jon feels about the very journey they're taking if even THAT is the pinprick of light at the surface Martin's hope of fixing the world?  does Jon even have that tiny spark of hope?

me:  for this statement to really parallel how the characters in the show are trapped, it would have to include something about how they turned on each other when they couldn't escape statement:  [does exactly that] me:  surprisedpikachu.jpg

Jon's "god, I hate the Buried" and struggling to catch his breath after... .________.   retraumatizing himself over his own stay in the coffin....  I'm so SAD

Martin:  Man I wish I had some magazines Martin:  *imagines Leitner magazine*  ACTUALLY NEVERMIND

ohh I do NOT like Martin seeing a spade and then giving in to using it I do NOT LIKE THAT AT ALL where is my boy who refused to pick up the telephone

LKSJDFLSJF I KNEW THAT WHEN WE HEARD FROM ANNABELLE THE VOICE WOULD BE UNDERWHELMING  listen it's impossible to top "Jon reading a woman's statement" voice that is just maximum appeal to me it doesn't get sexier than that

I am seething this entire conversation but Martin starting out with refusal and telling her to stop calling him is giving me my scraps of validation against the "Martin's been working for the Web the whole time" idea

"does he even need you at all" Annabelle........is that really the angle you're gonna try............are you kidding me.......

okay what is Annabelle's angle here at all Trying to convince him that Jon doesn't need him...and she does? Offering him help...to do what? She's obviously trying to hit some nerves or pull some strings but it felt very hamfisted fhhsdfh

I'm going to make Martin hanging up on Annabelle and telling her to never contact him again my ringtone

*adds Telephone by Lady Gaga to my TMA playlist*   it's a Martin song

[dykehaus]

Chromatica first listen reactions

Chromatica 1 - Orchestral opening, very cinematic like she threw a Hans Zimmer wig in the ring here for apparently no reason other than to maybe suggest a video game/scifi movie opening? I’m getting opening credits to a Square Enix game circa 2005 so. I’m good with it.

Alice - MY NAME. ISN’T ALICE. Straight into the dance beats… yes god. Verses may be forgettable and the lyrics/conceit of the song isn’t that interesting but I’m really loving the chorus sound and the modulated voice in the bridge - Judas teas!! Other than the bridge, kinda filler? Remains to be seen on second listen.

Stupid Love - I didn’t love this when it leaked or was officially released. I almost let the dumb video sour the potential of it. Is it the greatest song here? No it’s just as dumb as its video. But it’s actually more enjoyable when you just accept that it’s dumb and don’t try to fight against it. It’s got some crisp BTW B-side sounding production and corniness to it and we can get behind that! After school special pop. Not sorry, I’ll listen to Stupid Love.

Rain on Me - Has gay sex in public while this plays. Someone meanwhile smokes a cigarette in a Brooklyn warehouse and sips a matcha cocktail. Next.

Free Woman - KNOCK OUT in my opinion. Like an upbeat So Happy I Could Die I would argue… Also might be one of the lezzier items on offer here. Which is among my priorities in listening to any Lady Gaga output. You really get the texture of her vocals here and Gaga’s voice is one of her real selling points. There are no girls who make this kind of music that have her intonation. Periodt. I’m a Free Wuhman!

Fun Tonight - Is this the ballad? It’s not a ballad. It’s a dance song. But it has Gypsy from ARTPOP vibes. The Gaga equivalent of a torch song. This is the song you put on when you’re having a little early 00s white girl in a romcom sad montage moment and there’s certainly a time and place for that! This is definitely about Christian and for that reason I wish it were angrier lmao. (Fuck him)

Chromatica II - More moody strings! I definitely get more of a video game feel from this than cinematic necessarily. Feels like an album version of a cut scene.

911 - Heavy bass! Chanting robot voice! Would’ve given myself a wettie through the car speakers with this if I were still driving on the regular. This vocal is of kin with Madonna’s on Madame X. The lyrics here are GARBAGE  but it might get the Heavy Metal Lover treatment where I’ll eventually love every bit of it.

Plastic Doll - This is Barbie Girl but played straight. Right now I don’t love that but given enough to drink I will think it’s transcendent art. She rhymed ‘saga’ and ‘gaga’! Someone will inevitably perform a genderqueer drag act to this.

Sour Candy - I don’t pretend to know actually anything about Kpop. Their presence here gives me unrelenting early 00s vibes. Is that a big reference point for Kpop groups? I have no idea. I think this one might have real commercial value considering the crossover event of it all. The production here is really just. fine. Capable. But I LOVE the Gaga vocal!! My favorite other than Free Woman thus far.

Enigma - She put some effort into the lyrics here! Thanks G! Killer, signature soaring Gaga chorus. The enigma thing is technically self promotion for her never-ending Vegas residency (which costs about a billion to attend). This has 70s disco sparkle to it and it’s really enjoyable.

Replay - (Shawty’s like a replay?). When the electro-hook kicks in here, I just want to get up and dance. This whole section of the album actually after Chromatica II (should we call it Act 2?) feels like it’s trying to ramp the energy back up after a dip. “Your monsters torture me!” Me looking up at my Fame Monster merchandise.

Chromatica III - OK like the cut scene before the final boss! My favorite of the three orchestral songs. Makes sense considering what’s to come in Sine From Above.

Sine From Above - FUCK. For me, the best song on the album on first listen. This has the most “narrative” and “build” as I would say in a reader’s report at work. Elton John actually brings even more gravitas to this. Let’s spell it out kids: W-I-G! Before there was love there was silence!!!

1000 Doves - It’s depressing me a bit how plaintive she is on this album. But somehow this song is still uptempo? Reminds me of the original version of Dope. But like, listenable. Much as we valorize ARTPOP was oddly prescient for its release year, there were legit duds on that album. Dope was one of them.

Babylon - You can serve it to me ancient city style! She said lemme ham it up real quick to finish this ditty off. The Lady Gaga equivalent of Liza Minnelli turns off a lamp. Gossip! Babble on! This is what I’ll put on to get dressed and, nostalgically, it gives me a little of Disco Heaven closing The Fame. This might start up shit with Madonna again like the good old days :)

OVERALL THOUGHTS: This is the most homogenous album she’s released since The Fame. It’s also one of the snappiest, smoothest listens as an album. Sometimes Gaga albums are better taken in bites... One of the upsides: that homogeneity makes it automatically more cohesive than say, Born This Way or even Joanne (cowboy crap aside). Do the complaints that she’s playing it safe hold water? Absolutely and that’s just as I expected. But this is the album she frankly needed to make at this stage. Just as Madonna needed to make Ray of Light when she did. After such massive and unexpected success basically under the guise of ANOTHER character (this one a basic girl in the Ally/SiB character), she needed to ease back into the Gaga machine.

BEST SONGS: Sine From Above, Free Woman, Enigma, Babylon

Anyway, I’m putting Sine From Above on repeat now!! 

EDIT AFTER 24 HOURS: best songs are enigma, 911, babylon, and rain on me. and i stick by really enjoying sine from above in all its 2012 edm hangover in ibiza-ness. alice is really a grower on several listens. fun tonight, 1000 doves, and stupid love round out the bottom for sure. 

[deadcactuswalking]

REVIEWING THE CHARTS: 13/02/2021 (Digga D, AJ Tracey, Cardi B)

It’s not as big of a week as it is just a confusing one, so there’s no pre-amble. Olivia Rodrigo spends a fifth week at #1 with “drivers license” and let’s start REVIEWING THE CHARTS.

Rundown

I started writing this a bit later than usual so I just want to rush through most of what’s here. The songs dropping out of the UK Top 75 are either debuts from not long ago like “Notorious” by Bugzy Malone featuring Chip and “Lo Vas A Olvidar” by Billie Eilish and ROSALÍA, or songs that have been here for a while, like “Monster”  by Shawn Mendes and Justin Bieber, “Holy” by Justin Bieber featuring Chance the Rapper and “Dynamite” by BTS. We even have some #1 hits dropping out of the Top 75 this week, like “Dreams” by Fleetwood Mac, “WAP” by Cardi B featuring Megan Thee Stallion and “Shallow” by Lady Gaga and Bradley Cooper. In terms of fallers, we have, seemingly, some of the older Winter cuts being replaced, as we see “Sweet Melody” by Little Mix getting a harsh streaming cut down to #30,  “Whoopty” by CJ down to #33, “Levitating” by Dua Lipa and remixed by DaBaby down to #34 (although this could rebound given the album release), “you broke me first” by Tate McRae at #37, “SO DONE” by The Kid YAOI at #57, “All I Want” by Olivia Rodrigo at #61, “Looking for Me” by Diplo, Paul Woodford and Kareen Lomax at #62, “Train Wreck” by James Arthur at #63, “See Nobody” by Wes Nelson and Hardy Caprio at #64, “Take You Dancing” by Jason Derulo at #65, “Therefore I Am” by Billie Eilish at #68, “Before You Go” by Lewis Capaldi at #72 and “Golden” by Harry Styles at #73, as well as some more recent debuts, including the entirety of Fredo’s album impact from last week, as “Money Talks” with Dave is at #11, “Ready” with Summer Walker at #31 and “Burner on Deck” with Young Adz and the late Pop Smoke at #32. “Skin” by Sabrina Carpenter and “Apricots”  by Bicep aren’t faring that well either, at #51 and #56 respectively. When I said these songs are being replaced, I wasn’t overestimating anything as we have our new crop of hits seemingly all surging, as “Martin & Gina” by Polo G is at #54, “Be the One” by Rudimental, MORGAN, TIKE and Digga D is at #49, “Best Friend” by Saweetie featuring Doja Cat is at #42, “My Head & My Heart” by Ava Max is at #35, “Love Not War (The Tampa Beat)” by Jason Derulo and Nuka is at #27, “Heat Waves” by Glass Animals is at #24, “Your Love (9PM)” by ATB, Topic and A7S is at #23 (it’s honestly starting to grow on me), and “Blinding Lights” by the Weeknd is somehow back up to #20. Speaking of the top 20, we also have “Friday” by Riton, Nightcrawlers and Musafa & Hypeman dopamine re-editing itself up to #16, “Save Your Tears” also by the Weeknd at #15, and two new top 10 hits, both songs with basically the same chart run and genre. “Goosebumps” by Travis Scott, remixed by HVME, remixed by Travis Scott is at #10, becoming HVME’s first and Travis’ fourth top 10 hit here in Britain. We also have “The Business” by Tiesto grooving up to #7, becoming Tiesto’s fourth top 10 hit. I honestly feel bad for the still completely uncredited vocalist. We also have a third new top 10 entry but that’s a debut that we can discuss later. I should also note that “Roses” by SAINt JHN and remixed by Imanbek is back at #74, and a winning Eurovision song, “Arcade”, by Dutch singer Duncan Lawrence is also back at #39 off of the back of some TikTok traction. I think this is the most streamed Eurovision now – I’d watch out for this being a big hit. Welp, time to get into our really, and I mean REALLY, varied and weird crop of new arrivals, starting with...

NEW ARRIVALS

#75 – “Roadtrip” – Dream and PmBata

Produced by Banrisk and Perish Beats

Okay, so this is a song by Minecraft YouTuber Dream, or at least that’s who I think he is. I think there was some kind of scandal related to him, and a couple people got involved and someone got doxed... listen, I don’t care. Not only is this song really not worthy of reviewing on the principle that unlike Wilbur Soot a couple weeks ago, Dream has never been a musician, which is clear from how involved no-name singer PmBata was in this, but I care for my private information not being made public so... What ridiculous excuse do I have to not review this? Okay, 1997 reggae-rock classic “Doin’ Time” by Sublime returns to #75 after Boris Johnson made a TikTok in the Houses of Parliament where he says “Pogchamp, Brexiteers, I just got tested for COVID-19” with the song in the background, and Joe Biden is on a Zoom call with him a few seconds later visibly annoyed because he prefers the New Radicals. Sure, let’s go with that. What was this entry about again?

#71 – “Goodbye” – Imanbek and Goodboys

Produced by Joris Mur, Imanbek and Goodboys

Everyone’s favourite Kazakh house producer Imanbek is finally back on the charts with his collaboration with British pop trio Goodboys, who you may know from their carbon-copy hits made with MEDUZA. After listening to that EP he made with Rita Ora, I’m slightly less impressed with Imanbek’s production, but that EP’s impact, if any, will be seen when the lead single featuring David Guetta and Gunna debuts low next week. Yes, seriously, all four on the same track. Anyway, this song, “Goodbye”, is actually pretty okay, with a generic deep house groove and fake hand-clap effectively saved by the Goodboys’ really intriguing vocal delivery and processing, which ends up in a Travis Scott-like Auto-Tune harmony that’s honestly pretty endearing right before the anti-climactic slap-house drop. The song’s lyrical content probably isn’t worth talking about, but it’s about a generic struggle with a break-up, and how hard it is for one of these good boys to say good bye. The build-up with the pre-chorus before the blue-balls second drop is kind of genius, and that’s probably my favourite part of the song outside of the abrupt vocaloid drop at the end. For what it’s worth, it takes more risks than most of these house-pop songs, most notably by having only a single verse in the middle of the song, and being really short, clocking in at less than two and a half minutes. It’s not as infectious as “Piece of Your Heart”, but this is fine. I’m glad it’s here if it’s going to give Imanbek another non-Rita Ora-assisted hit.

#60 – “Little Bit of Love” – Tom Grennan

Produced by Jamie Scott, LOSTBOY and Daniel Bryer

Tom Grennan is an English singer-songwriter who released their debut record in 2016 and was crowned by the BBC as the “Sound of 2017”, before dropping off the face of the Earth. He was brought to fame by a guest feature on a Chase & Status song that didn’t even do that well and now he’s back with the lead single from his upcoming sophomore effort, and his highest ever charting song. Well, is it any good? I mean, I like OneRepublic too. The rising strings here in the intro and chorus are pretty cool, and I’ll give it to Grennan for having an interesting voice but the odd level of grit in it does not fit well for this plastic production, which quickly devolves into vaguely danceable synth-mess that’s just not interesting. The content is mostly about unconditional love, particularly one that feels not particularly reciprocated, although some of the detail in the second verse feels like it’s going somewhere. I’ll admit, the chorus is catchy, but this mix puts way too much emphasis on a flawed vocal take from Grennan, which really detracts from the pathetic excuse for a bridge. I do enjoy how this feels like a flash-back to the mid-2010s, where happier, synth-based pop was this prominent, and I do love how the strings come back in the outro, but good production can’t do much to save a song that just feels under-cooked and definitely under-written. The OneRepublic comparison feels particularly fitting here too because their stuff tends to be just as stagnant, not to mention the lyrical riffs off of “Counting Stars”. I mean, when you start your first verse – in the first 10 or so seconds of the track – with the most recognisable part of a very recognisable song, I think Ryan Tedder deserves at least some royalties.

#58 – “Astronaut in the Ocean” – Masked Wolf

Produced by Tyron Hapi

Masked Wolf is an Australian singer and this song is actually from June 2019, just gaining enough traction, presumably off of TikTok, to debut on the charts this week. The song got a 2021 reissue and I assume a remix and, well... for God’s sake. The Kid LAROI should not have been an entry point for Australian trap, because outside of a second or two of distortion in the intro, this is far from unique. It has a guitar-based trap instrumental with dark 808s that even Gunna would pass up on, and an Auto-Tuned delivery from Masked Wolf, clearly trying too hard to replicate Drake in the intro and bridge, Kid Cudi in the chorus, G-Eazy in the first verse, Eminem AND Kendrick on the second verse, to the point where he even directly references Kendrick Lamar’s much better music. He suffers from the same problems as all of these artists combined, with lyrics that seem like they’re building up off of something interesting about depression before going into aimless flexing like a mid-tier Kid Cudi track, flows that sound as meandering and checked-out as Drake’s, the failed attempt at some kind of white-boy swagger that G-Eazy hasn’t pulled off successfully since 2016, the substance-less content hidden behind fast flows from Eminem and... oh, my God, this guy’s just like Australian Logic. I don’t like American Logic, why do we need this guy too? Yeah, this is bad, and there’s not much worth nitpicking in this mix or even the lyrics to even point out. I guess the worst bar is when he says he believes in G-O-D but not a T-H-O-T. So he’s a slut-shaming NF now? Jesus Christ, I’d take a full album from The Kid LAROI over this.

So the next two songs are ones I’ll actually need to somewhat lump together, as they are consecutive on the chart and both from the same album, and the same washed-up band.

#53 – “Waiting on a War” – Foo Fighters

Produced by Greg Kurstin

We have two songs from Dave Grohl and friends here from their latest album, Medicine at Midnight, technically three if we count the entire top 100, which means, yes, the UK just had a Foo Fighters album bomb. I’ll focus on the album as a whole with the next song because this is easily the worse track here and the worst track on the album purely out of how misguided it is. Dave Grohl wrote this song because he felt inspired by the current hell-scape of the political climate, reminding him of his own youth when he was surrounded by rising Cold War tensions. His young daughter asked him if there was going to be a war and naturally this song came out of it, reflecting on the fears he and his daughter have and that everyone deserves a future and a lifetime not taken away from them by conflict and fear. This is a good song idea but it absolutely does not work, and that’s partially down to the production. When I first heard this track on the album, I genuinely grimaced at the vocoder-mumble that Grohl takes on against the scratchy acoustic guitars. The whole point of the instrumentation is that it builds tension with rising strings, multi-tracked acoustics and eventually some electric guitars and powerful drums, yet because of how slow-paced the song is, it fails to mirror the rising tension of the prospect of there being a war. Instead, it’s a slog and its pay-off by the end feels unwarranted in the most boring way. Sure, the squeals of the guitars in the back of the mix sound good, but surely a song like this should not end like any of the Foo Fighters’ other pop-rock anthems, especially not as abruptly as it does. Wouldn’t you want a more subdued outro to comfort your daughter’s fears that at least right now, everything’s okay? That would make the most sense to me, but that’s thrown out of the window, with pathetic songwriting, with verses that play word association with the blandest of rhymes, seemingly irrelevant pop-song-generator filer and a chorus that is mind-numbingly repetitive but ultimately fails to build tension because of the content asking us to wait, constantly, even when it gets into its heavier rock tone. We’re supposed to wait for something that is only implied to never come, because there isn’t finality. Sure, that could work as a way of saying that Grohl is just as uncertain and scared as his daughter is about political conflict, but that would imply this song gives off any further emotion than the fact the Foo Fighters felt the need to cut a vaguely political track out of necessity. As a song, and as an album, Dave Grohl is utterly confused, and “Waiting on a War” is way too slow and non-specific to act as a protest song, as well as being way too on-the-nose for it to work as a ballad. Let’s talk about this next single.

#52 – “Making a Fire” – Foo Fighters

Produced by Greg Kurstin

What the hell is Greg Kurstin doing here? This is the first track on the album and is supposed to make some kind of gripping impact but is instead just a snoozefest. The choral female vocals sound bored, but at least it’s not as strained as the struggling Dave Grohl trying and failing to yelp over a stiff groove which has its momentum killed by drumming too slow and mixed too oddly to make this pre-chorus even coherent, not helped by Grohl’s butt-rock delivery and non-descript lyrics. There could be a guitar solo here, to make this track feel memorable, but no, it’s hidden under a pre-chorus with an extended gospel bridge that doesn’t build up effectively to a chorus that just comes crashing in and hence has no effect. Maybe I just can’t listen to arena  rock in a quarantine context, but I can’t even imagine this making much of a fuss in a packed stadium without desperately needing tweaks in the songwriting and especially the production, because this just sounds stunted. It’s telling that Grohl made his best tracks as the Foo Fighters on his own and those first two records, alongside a pretty decent 2014 comeback in the form of Sonic Highways, are still great. I’m not denying that Grohl can write a good song, or that the Food Figures can’t play, because they’re all talented guys. This is just one album in many that leaves me with the feeling that these guys just can’t do much more outside of their comfort zone than fail miserably. These songs won’t stick around, and thank God for that.

#50 – “Believe Me” – Navos

Produced by Tom Demac and Navos

Another week, another... okay, but we already had a generic pop-infused deep house track from a couple EDM randos, do we really need another? Okay, well, this one is even less interesting than Imanbek’s effort as it doesn’t even try for a verse, instead going for a deep house groove I’ve heard countless times before, drowned out by some square synths and, yes, you guessed it, 90s piano loops and an uncredited female vocalist repeating basically the same couple lines over and over. This is made for the clubs, but I feel like even regular club-goers would tire of this vocaloid drop and cloudy production two minutes in. There’s nothing worth discussing here, because this probably took as many minutes to make as it did to listen to. I have no idea why Navos debuts a song so high, but I’ve got to assume TikTok’s to blame. Apparently this guy makes tech house, where’d any of that skill or intrigue go here?

#21 – “Up” – Cardi B

Produced by Sean Island, DJ SwanQo and Yung Dza

Anyone else surprised at how such a big name gets production from people I’ve never heard of before? Not that it matters, it’s just odd. Anyways, this is Cardi’s new single, presumably from that ever-elusive second album, debuting around 20 spots lower than it will in the US, and it’s going for a more gangsta-rap content than the hyper-sexual “WAP”, but does she keep the same energy? Well, yes... in fact, after all the mediocrity, I’m glad to have a genuinely great song debut this week. This is a great, bass-heavy beat that gives a Memphis phonk feel in the dark keys as well as the hard-hitting 808s and spacey percs and sound effects that add some needed distortion, even if there’s going to be some brief clipping along the way. Cardi brings some necessary energy from the brilliant opening lyrics and continues with a fast-paced, chanting flow that accentuates some of her funnier lyrics with her charisma that she always brings to a trap track like this. I’d say that this is maybe too repetitive – with very little of the verses to speak of – or even somewhat derivative of her previous song, “Money”, but there’s a lot better lyrical content in this one, not to mention how well she complements a more straight-forward but still killer beat. Oh, yeah, and Cardi’s stacks are Shaq-height as she dismisses haters with an impressive level of swagger and confidence, that carries the refrain, but that’s not to say the lyrics aren’t really great in the verses. There’s genuinely funny and sexy wordplay here, especially in the second verse, and also some great liners: “hoes speakin’ cap-anese”, accusing her haters of having pink-eye and their breath smelling like “horse sex”. This is a short, probably underdeveloped song, but it’s the type of surreal, high-energy trap I kind of really love and I hope this sticks around further in the UK.

#19 – “Latest Trends” – A1 x J1

Produced by ShoBeatz

A1 x J1 are a British rap duo with no other songs. Yeah, something’s fishy here: this is their only song on Spotify that blew up from a 15-second clip on TikTok, and their Spotify bio is trying to decide whether they’re the next D-Block Europe or the Beatles, as well as really emphasising how the song grew “all organically”, even though they’re already signed to Universal... yeah, there’s nothing subtle here, so I won’t buy this TikTok fame schtick, but does it matter when the song is good? Well, not really, and honestly, I’m kind of into this guitar-based drill-R&B fusion in the beat, but it doesn’t really help the fact that J1’s Stormzy impression is janky and unconvincing, especially if he’s going to try for some shallow wordplay, and that A1’s Auto-Tuned croon is just boring, reminding me a lot of A Boogie wit da Hoodie, but with a less recognisable voice and delivery, even if the first verse contains a funny line about a woman making that ass clap “for the NHS”, although he totally took that from Swarmz anyway. Yeah, I’m not a fan of this fake attempt at an organic pop-drill crossover, but unfortunately, I can very much see this working, though I’d be happy if the British public will see through this dishonesty as soon as possible.

#5 – “Bringing it Back” – Digga D and AJ Tracey

Produced by TheElements and AoD

Now for a rap duo that makes more sense to debut this high and are actually, you know, separately successful rappers, therefore they debut in the top five, which is impressive. The whole concept of this song is that Digga D and AJ Tracey are using old flows, those that would be nostalgic to their deeper fan base, to spit bars on a new track called, fittingly “Bringing it Back”. The flow AJ Tracey brings back is from his overlong “Packages” freestyle, a five-minute track from 2016, that works more as a freestyle than it does as a song, where he uses a familiar UK drill flow to go off for a really long time, and, yes, it is pretty impressive but the flow becomes stale too quickly. Digga D uses his flow from his “Next Up?” freestyle from 2017, a similarly badly-mixed UK drill freestyle but with a much more palatable length. Digga D’s flow he uses in that track is arguably slicker but honestly one that I see used a lot in UK drill and by Digga D, so I’m not sure it’s not worth “bringing it back” when you could come up with a new, catchier flow. I’ll admit that “Bringing it Back”, however, is a pretty damn good song, with Digga D’s more technical and fluid flow allowing for a lot more intricate internal rhymes that sound really great over the triumphant, string-heavy drill beat, as he trades bars with AJ Tracey’s slower but more confident, laid-back flow, which allows him to spit some more specific, interesting bars, some of which really hit, like when he says he “locked up the food for the kids like Boris and then I let it go like Rashford”. Hey, I respect it, I haven’t heard a more clever way of intertwining political commentary with cocaine smuggling since Pusha T last released a record. The way AJ Tracey and Digga D play off of each other’s lines is really smooth, and especially how Digga D plays with the beat, as while his lyrics may be less interesting, they mash perfectly with the beat’s frantic fades in and out, especially in his last lines before the first chorus, where he asks for the track to literally be turned off... and it is. So, yeah, I’m pretty damn happy with this debuting so high off the energy alone, even if Digga D is going to pronounce “LOL” like a one-syllable word. I’d say this is actually a really good starting point for people who want to get into more UK drill because it has a lot of the grit and menace of the genre in a more accessible, catchy form, even if it may run a bit too long for my taste.

Conclusion

Wow, what a weird, weird week... and a lot of it was straight garbage. I’m giving Best of the Week to “Up” by Cardi B, with an Honourable Mention to Digga D and AJ Tracey for “Bringing it Back”, though Worst of the Week is pretty much a toss-up. I’ll give it to the Foo Fighters for “Waiting on a War”, with a Dishonourable Mention tied between “Astronaut in the Ocean” by Masked Wolf and “Believe Me” by Navos for just both being worthless. Anyways, here’s our top 10:

The UK Singles Chart is honestly kind of chaotic right now – even more so than usual – and I don’t see that changing. Even if I don’t like all of the songs, it’s at least compelling. Anyways, thank you for reading and you can follow me @cactusinthebank on Twitter if you want. I can’t really make any predictions for next week other than Taylor Swift re-recording her own music and I guess some impact from Rita Ora and Imanbek, or hopefully, slowthai. Regardless of what happens, I’ll see you next week!

[keatondj]

My Personal Ranking of Lady Gaga’s Discography

The time has come. The day has arrived. I am so excited to finally do this list!

Lady Gaga is one of the most influential, innovative, and incomparable artists of this generation. I think her to be one of the greatest musical artists to ever live. Her impact on pop culture as a whole cannot be ignored, and her talents as a singer/songwriter is limitless.

I remember first seeing her perform on So You Think You Can Dance with that iconic bleach-blonde, sharp-edged wig and those LED glasses with text on them and being absolutely mesmerized. Ever since that performance, I had been a casual fan, but absolute admirer of her music. Around 2016-2017 is when I decided to listen to pop music more regularly, and the first artist I knew I had to add to my library was Gaga. It was then that I listened to all her albums and officially became a Little Monster.

Each one of her albums is so incredibly unique, yet so undeniably Gaga at the same time. With the recent release of her sixth studio album Chromatica, I can now finally give my ranking of her incredible discography. I will only be covering her solo studio albums, so A Star Is Born and Cheek to Cheek will not be included.

A new thing I want to add to each album review is add a superlative that the album possesses to showcase its respective strength in the discography as a whole.

Reminder: this is my opinion. Everyone has a different ear, and certain sounds and songs resonate with different people. I’m just sharing my personal thoughts and experiences with these albums.

6. Joanne (2016)

This feels like pure blasphemy to put this album as the lowest ranking on the list when it is objectively one of Gaga’s strongest and more mature albums. It showcases her versatility as a songwriter to the nth degree, and she is the most vocally ferocious on this album. 

It is incredibly top-heavy for my taste (the first seven songs are absolutely sublime to listen to). It’s unfortunate, but from “Sinner’s Prayer” to the end, the album becomes borderline unlistenable to me. Gaga’s vocal delivery on the last few songs seems over-dramatic and unauthentic, and also technically not up to par with what I know she can do.

I think the big concern about Joanne is the feigned nature that I think I’m listening to. Gaga has always been theatrical and performative with her music, but with Joanne, I don’t seem to buy it as well. It suits a more dance-pop and electronic feel that we know and love her for. Maybe that’s the gay sensibilities in me talking; that’s just how I feel. 

She was far more successful with the A Star Is Born soundtrack in terms of writing for this genre. I applaud Gaga for going out on a limb with this massive genre shift, and it worked well, for the most part.

Favorite Songs: “Diamond Heart” through “Million Reasons”

Superlatives: Most Stripped, Most Diverse

                                           ---------------------------

5. Artpop (2013)

I have very conflicted feelings about this album. At its best, it is exploratory, imaginative, and audacious. At its worst, it’s ostentatious, inaccessible, and clumsy.

It undoubtedly has some of Gaga’s sickest and coolest production to date; she really amped up the electronic feel for this album. She also experimented with several contemporary genres (hip hop, R&B, dubstep, trap, rock, etc.) quite skillfully on various tracks like “MANiCURE”, “Do What U Want”, and “Swine”. However, the production does go overboard sometimes, creating a heavy and clunky sound (”Swine” often becomes very harsh to listen to).

Lyrically, I find that it can be very distant, boastful, and vain. Certain songs like “Donatella” and “Fashion” are very specific to Gaga’s lifestyle and obvious love for high fashion, but it is not relatable to the common listener (or at least not me). The extravagant nature of the songs, and even the album as a whole, is hard to really dive into.

I still love this album a lot, but more like as a guilty pleasure. I see many people regard it to be her underrated masterpiece, and I understand where they are coming from, but find them to be misguided. It’s a strong piece of work, but Gaga just shot for the stars and went a little too far for her own good.

Favorite Songs: “Aura”, “Venus”, “G.U.Y.”, “Sexxx Dreams”, “ARTPOP”, “Applause”

Superlatives: Most Experimental, Most Bold

                                       ---------------------------

4. The Fame (2008) 

It truly pains me to put this album so low because it’s the record that introduced us to the brilliance of her work and it features some of my absolute favorite Gaga tracks on it (”Poker Face” still hits hard even today). I cannot let the nostalgic nature of the album cloud my judgment, though. This only goes to show how incredibly strong her discography is; we are really splitting hairs at this point.

What Gaga did for the music industry back in 2008 is insurmountable and outrageous. She brought back the four-to-the-floor sound to the radio in a campy and edgy way that we had never heard before. She will most likely be the biggest juggernaut of an artist I will ever see in my lifetime; she will define my era of music as a child. This is the era I mainly associate with the iconic nature of Lady Gaga. 

It’s comparatively tame to her other work since she was still testing the waters and figuring herself out as an artist. But by 2008′s standards, terms like “disco stick” and “bluffin with my muffin” were totally out-there and controversial. Songs like “Paparazzi”, “LoveGame” and “Poker Face” pushed the envelope and influenced many artists for years to come.

Besides the lead singles, many of the songs on the album are not too remarkable and probably the closest thing you can classify as “filler tracks”. They’re inconsequential, generic, and uneventful compared to the powerhouse singles. 

While these songs also deal with fame and the opulent lifestyle like the ones I mentioned for ARTPOP, they were written from the perspective of someone who was not yet famous. The whole idea of the album is playing with the universal dream and fantasy of what fame is like. In turn, that make the album so much more relatable, universal, and engaging.

This is one of the greatest debut albums ever produced, and it paved the way for Gaga’s career and artistry. I’m happy to say that it basically gets close to pop perfection from here on out.

Favorite Songs: “Just Dance”, “LoveGame”, “Poker Face”, “The Fame”, “Starstruck”

Superlatives: Most Revolutionary, Most Iconic

                                            ---------------------------

3. Chromatica (2020)

This is the first album of her work that I was eagerly waiting for as a proper Little Monster. I was absolutely ecstatic when the first information about the album was coming out, including the singles. It was the album that I had been waiting for for a long time... and it absolutely delivered. It was everything I needed it to be and more.

Vocally, it is Gaga’s most impressive work to date. Her voice has matured so beautifully over the past 12 years, and she has learned to use her upper register in the D5-F5 range more healthily, powerfully, and consistently than before. There were several moments throughout the album that I was gobsmacked at the force of her voice. 

I will admit it is the most “tame” of all her works in terms of the outlandish and campy nature with which we know her for (just ahead of The Fame). Instead, she writes with more sophistication, finesse, and honesty that has come with more experience. On first listen, it seems rudimentary, but as time goes on, the inner complexities of the album start to reveal themselves.

For being a straight-up dance album through and through, it is brutally honest and personal. There is real pain and heartache that is displayed through much of the album, and Gaga is using music as a means of catharsis to release the pain. It makes the album incredibly relatable and accessible, allowing the listeners to dance through the pain. Released in a time when the whole world was faced with such uncertainty and worry, this album is definitely a great outlet for those looking for comfort.

Being as huge of a fan of artists like Kylie Minogue, Robyn, and Carly Rae Jepsen as I am, this album truly delivers on the dance/dance-pop department. The production is impeccably done and spearheaded by Bloodpop (who I hope is Gaga’s main collaborator from now on). Even the Chromatica interludes are stunningly gorgeous and inform how the next act of the album will go. In my opinion, Act I of the album (Tracks 1-6) is absolute pop perfection; I wouldn’t change a single thing about any of those tracks.

The album may run a little short, and it’s tamer compared to her earlier works, but it is still brilliant nonetheless. With a collaboration with the reigning Princess of Pop, Ariana Grande, you know it has to be amazing. This will absolutely go down as one of the best dance albums ever written. This is Gaga’s return to form, and we have been so blessed.

(Ok, but Chromatica II into 911 is THE serve. She did THAT. Do you know what she did? THAT.)

Favorite Songs: “Chromatica I”, “Alice”, “Stupid Love”, “Rain On Me”, “Free Woman”, “Fun Tonight”, “911″, “1000 Doves”

Superlatives: Most Cohesive, Most Personal

                                       ---------------------------

2. The Fame Monster (2009)

I’m gonna be perfectly honest here: it took the longest time for this album to grow on me. Even longer than ARTPOP. But with time, I was finally able to see just how sleek, crisp, and perfect of an album this really is.

This was Gaga’s expansion to The Fame that she wrote based on her experiences with touring, fame, and the toll that can take on someone. It is a concept album with each song being based on a personal fear of Gaga’s that I am sure were all amplified with the high intensity of being a pop star. 

You can immediately tell the difference between this album and its predecessor. It’s darker, it’s sexier, and it’s candid. Where The Fame was written from a place of imagination and wonder, this was written from a place of truth and fear. The amount of growth that came from just a year on the road is staggering.

It is undeniably her most polished album in terms of production and composition. It took the ambition of sonic perfection that The Fame was going for, and amped it up even more. Each song has its own feel to it, but they all work together so well as an album.

There is one song that makes this album imperfect and keeps it from my number one spot, and the song will make tons of Little Monsters angry: “Speechless”. I just don’t like it, no matter how many times I’ve tried to get into it. It’s written in C major (my least favorite key), it’s overly sentimental and hokey, and it disrupts the flow of pop that keeps the album together. I know it’s an incredibly personal song for her, but it is just mediocre to me; I skip it everytime.

Other than that, I think the album is absolute perfection. “Bad Romance” is one of the most iconic and influential songs in her songbook and even the Great American Songbook, and the non-singles are just as powerful, if not better. This album is the standard to which Gaga is held, and any album in the future will struggle to hold its own against this amazing work. Except one. ;) 

Favorite Songs: “Bad Romance”, “Alejandro”, “Monster”, “Dance In The Dark”, “So Happy I Could Die”

Superlatives: Most Polished, Most Dark

                                         --------------------------- 

1. Born This Way (2011)

Is there really any other option?

It’s the album that debuted at #1 on the Billboard charts. It’s the album with 5 of her most iconic and successful singles (the title song, “Judas”, “The Edge of Glory”, “You And I”, and “Marry The Night”). It’s the album that was unabashedly open about its advocacy, and gave voice to anyone who ever felt cheated by life or counted out. Of course it has to be in the number one spot.

This is Gaga at her freest, her most courageous, her most daring. She went all out in this record, and the results are absolutely remarkable. I am a massive fan of the 80′s in all aspects (especially the music), so the influence of 80′s rock and pop on the album satisfy my sensibilities swimmingly. The ingenuity and artistry which she demonstrates in the composition of this album is just mind-blowing.

“The Edge of Glory” is her best song. Hands down. No question. Bottom line, cut, and dry. The first time I heard it back in 2011 was so impactful to me. I learned just what an impressive singer Gaga is, and how powerful of a songwriter she is. It is one of the most euphoric, devil-may-care, and joyous songs ever written, and one of the most important songs in my life. The fact that it perfectly closes out the thrilling roller-coaster ride of Born This Way is the cherry on top.

It might be a little messier and imprecise than The Fame Monster, but it’s lows never get as low, and its highs are astronomically high. The arc that this album takes me through is astonishing. It is an album about celebrating life, loving others and yourself, and throwing caution to the wind. Who can’t relate to that and find comfort in it?

I could go on for ages about this album, but I’ll keep it simple. This is Gaga’s magnum opus, and one of the best pop records ever created. I am so unbelievably grateful for what it has done for my life, and it will forever be one of my favorite albums ever written. It taught me that I am unequivocally born this way, and that I should strive to be on the edge of glory.

Favorite Songs: The whole tracklist   ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

Superlatives: Most Daring, Most Adventurous, Most Creative

                                        ---------------------------

I have been wanting to do this list for so long, and I am thrilled to finally get my thoughts out in a post. Lady Gaga is one of the best and most iconic musicals artists ever, and I am eagerly hopeful for the future of her music. I recently uploaded a reaction video of me listening to Chromatica for the first time if you’d like to watch. I am an absolute dork in it, and completely got my life on the first listen. I’ll include it as a separate post on my page as well. Enjoy!

https://youtu.be/zdEH2RRc3DE

[laylacooke]

Back To The Future || Mina & Layla

timing: during the weeks the carnival was in town  parties: @drowningisinevitable & @laylacooke summary: Mina and Layla decide to visit the Hall of Mirrors at the carnival. warnings: death mention, domestic abuse, emotional abuse, self harm, & animal cruelty [proceed with caution!]

Why Layla had wanted to go back to the carnival after the past three experiences was beyond her, but there was just something that continued to pull her in. Something about the mysteriousness of it all, and instead of making anyone else experience her own twisted curiosity, she opted to go alone yet again. However, this trip she would be avoiding Hanyo, the Merry-Go-Round, and the Mime Fun House, as it seemed time spent at the hellish carnival didn’t offer much in the way of fun. At least not on those last three goes, but there had to be at least one thing, and she was determined to find it.

Paying to get in, Layla stepped past the gate and began scanning the area. It was, once again, filled with many townsfolk both human and non-human as her nose alerted her to, but they all seemed to be having a good time, which was making it hard for her to register where not to go. Seeing someone walk by, she spoke up hoping for some advice of what to try, “I’ve been here three times already, but I always seem to choose the wrong thing. Any ideas on what could actually be fun around here?”

In hindsight, if Mina were to look back on it all, coming to the carnival was a terrible idea. She’d only barely made it through the gate before she was filled with the overwhelming desire to turn around and leave. For one, it was far too crowded. Several people bumped into her in a matter of seconds, causing her to call out a rapid, “Sorry! Sorry! Sorry!” as they walked away. Second, there were Fae around. She could feel them, though she didn’t know where or who. If there were Fae, then there were probably other supernatural creatures, peoples. She was trying to do better about thinking of them as people, not monsters. It was a work in progress. Still, she was reminded of her father, her promise, and the fact that she hadn’t brought any sort of weapon with her into the carnival. She should leave.

Instead, Mina walked further in. The smell of strange, fried foods filled her nose, causing her to wrinkle it a bit. Everywhere she looked, there were families with laughing children, friends playing games. People looked happy. Perhaps that was why she kept walking in; Mina wanted, just for a moment, to feel that joyous and free. She just walked for a bit, taking everything in, when she heard a voice. Mina turned to face a redheaded girl. She rubbed the back of her neck a bit, looking sheepish. “Ah, well, I’ve actually never been to a carnival before. I wouldn’t even know where to begin.”

The sounds surrounding her had made her ears perk. The first night she had gone, Layla was on edge. The noises of people screaming for various reasons and bb guns being fired at tin cans had left her nervous. It’s partly why Hanyo had been the only thing she had stuck around for. The next time she had Rio with her, but even then, it seemed as though chaos just couldn’t leave them alone, even on a Merry-Go-Round. And if the Mime Fun House, ironically with Nell, hadn’t been enough, she was back one last time to see if this carnival was as cursed as it had seemed from the beginning (aside from winning her beloved Catfish Monster plush, of course).

“Really? Well, I can tell you three places you don’t want to go.” She eyed every single one of them suspiciously, before looking back to the girl in front of her. “I thought I’d give this place one final try if you want a buddy. Otherwise, I’m thinking I might turn around and go home. Which is probably the smartest move to make.” Layla laughed, but a hint of nervousness was apparent in her voice.

Following the other girl’s eyes, Mina made note of the places she seemed to linger on. None of them seemed like her cup of tea, anyway. She hated the kind of motions that merry go rounds went through, mimes just reminded her of her doppelganger that had tried to kill her, and the people gathered around… was that a jar of mayonnaise? How strange. It was a bit too crowded for her taste, though. Instead, she gave the girl a smile. “I wouldn’t mind a friend to help at all. I’m afraid I’d get a bit lost on my own.” She was already incredibly turned around just from walking into the carnival. Knowing this town, as well as herself, she’d likely get herself lost and in trouble if she was left on her own. At least with another person around, she would have back up. And, Mina was learning, she always seemed to do better with other people around. Whether they were pulling her out of danger, or she was doing the same for them, it helped to have another person. “My name is Mina, by the way. It’s very nice to have a carnival buddy.”

Layla nodded in agreement, “You know, at this rate, I would be afraid to venture any farther into this place by myself as well.” She had been lucky the last few times she had come, if you wanted to call it that, but even having a stranger by her side was better than no one. However, when the girl mentioned her name, Layla’s eyes grew wide, “Mina...Like Broadway/West End loving Mina that has never listened to Lady Gaga?” A smile spread across her face, “It’s me. Layla. We’ve talked on the internet a few times!” White Crest really was a small town and knowing that she remotely knew her carnival buddy had eased some of the worry that was in her mind. At least if something bad happened the pair had already built somewhat of a trust between one another. “It really is a small world.”

“I don’t blame you”, Mina mused. “Are all carnivals like this? It seems… odd.” Maybe it was just her. Too many people always tended to break Mina out, scales forming on her arms under her sleeves. She was alright, now, though, especially when the other girl told her that she was Layla. Mina smiled brightly, pleased with her luck. “That would be me! And you’re Layla who loves Lady Gaga and wants to travel one day!” This was good. It couldn’t have turned out better, really. Layla seemed so nice online that she had to be similar in person. “It is a small world, a small town, really, but I think I’m quite thankful for it, this time around.” There were perks, she was realizing, to getting to know people. She was basking in the feeling of relief at being at the carnival with someone that wasn’t a total stranger when something caught the corner of her eye. Sunlight glinted off the sign for the hall of mirrors, drawing Mina in. She’d never really liked mirrors, not really, always picking apart her flaws, especially the more monstrous aspects of herself after a long swim, but… it could be fun? In any case, it certainly couldn’t be dangerous. “Would you like to try that out,” she asked Layla, motioning towards the entrance with the carnival worker waiting with a patient smile.

She thought for a moment, “Carnivals are a mixed bag, but nothing like this one. I mean there’s usually creepers at carnivals, but this place is just creepy.” She gave it a once over, before turning her attention back to Mina, “That is totes me! Oh, thank goodness you’re here, because honestly I was having second thoughts.” The minute Layla stepped through the gate, she had thought about turning around and leaving. Why did she keep doing this to herself? Why did any of these people, unless the residents of the town just liked pain. But humans who were unknowing about the supernatural had to have seen the world differently. She did when she was little, until she had found out about things that went bump in the night. She could remember the day her parents told her that werewolves and things were real. And it became solidified in her brain when she became one. “I think the fates were watching out for us this time.” She laughed nervously, until she noticed what Mina was suggesting. The Hall of Mirrors. While looking at herself in passing, unless she was getting ready, what would it hurt seeing herself in all different shapes. It could be fun, and she had needed a good laugh, “And okay, yeah. Let’s do it. Lead the way, Friend.” She had already had the crap scared out of her twice by moving animals and mimes. Call her skeptical, but she was going to approach this little adventure differently, instead of just diving in headfirst.

“It does suit the town, though,” Mina murmured. Of course, it made sense that things in White Crest wouldn’t be similar to things in the rest of the world. It could be such an awful place, she thought, remembering the mime version of herself that tried to kill her. But she’d also met a lot of nice people, Layla included, it seemed. So, Mina smiled at the redheaded girl and agreed. “I think you’re right. Fate seems to be kind today.” She decided to lead them into the Hall of Mirrors, avoiding the way the worker watched them all the way in. Truthfully, and she tried to always be truthful, Mina had never been in a hall of mirrors. She had no idea what to expect. But, as they stepped into the area, she startled a bit at seeing her reflection before she started laughing. Her body was stretched and twisted in ways that were silly to look at. Most of the mirrors were like that; silly in appearance, strange but amusing to look at. But when she looked in one… Mina had to peer in closer. The version of herself in the mirror was much younger, maybe eight, her hair pulled back tightly. There was an iron wound on her arm, both bloody and burning, and in her hands were claws. She was trying not to cry. Training exercise. She looked away, only to see herself a few years older, leading a glaistig woman into an alley while her father was lying in wait. “No,” Mina said quietly, eyes darting around wildly, as she realized the mirrors no longer seemed silly but sinister. She looked over to Layla, hoping the other girl wouldn’t notice the scenes playing on repeat.

“It really does.” With Mina leading the way, Layla followed her inside. Eyes narrowed at the worker watching them go in, the redhead couldn’t help, but turn back to get one last look at him, before they had entered. As she stepped into the deceiving room, she found a mirror that had made her look super tall and really skinny causing her to laugh, before moving to one that made her look short and round. So far things were going well. You mean there’s actually a normal carnival attraction to participate in around here? The thought settled in her mind, but before long, she had come across a mirror, except she wasn’t tall and skinny or short and squatty. She was a little older than she was now. Maybe late twenties, early thirties. There was a smile on her face as she held someone’s hand, but she couldn’t quite see who it was. Suddenly, running around behind her, Layla noticed a little boy. Out of reaction, she turned around to see if he was behind her, but when she realized he wasn’t, she looked back into the mirror. It wasn’t long, however, that the images in the mirror started to fade into something sinister. With nightfall lingering in the reflective glass, Layla noticed a full moon in the top corner, but it was the screams following it that caused her breath to hitch in her throat. And when the image shifted again, she noticed a woman...Frankie, maybe? Standing over a motionless animal with red fur. Layla. The unknown woman was sobbing; blood on her hands.

Tears coming to the teenager’s eyes, she gasped and stepped back. Was this her future?

Eyes shifting to Mina, she noticed the girl, too, had a shocked look on her face, but was it for some other reason? “Uh, maybe we should move onto the next room?” She quickly wiped the tears from her eyes hoping her new friend hadn’t noticed.

This was no longer fun. Mina was no longer enjoying the hall of mirrors, and all she wanted to do was get her and Layla out of there. The other girl was crying, clearly distressed by whatever was going on in the awful space, and Mina hated seeing other people upset. “Yeah, let’s, ah, let’s get out of here.” She led them away, only to encounter more mirrors. Lovely. Mina saw herself, years older, eyes bright and teeth sharp, looking at her in the window. A nix, not a girl. The nix winked, and the next thing Mina knew, she was drowning someone, their short, curly hair disappearing beneath the water. She looked away from the monster that she feared she would be, the creature she knew her mother and her kind and herself to be. Glancing at another mirror, she saw another, older Mina, this one with a knife in her hand, iron burns bubbling on her skin. A fae, one that seemed both impossibly old and you, trembled before the mirror version of herself. Mirror Mina raised the knife, and Mina snapped her eyes shut, unable to watch anymore. Scales broke out on her hands, nails extending into claws. She balled them into fists, skin breaking on her palms as she threw a solid punch at the mirror in front of her. It shattered. It didn’t stop the pounding in her ears, the tightness in her chest. She refused to let herself become that. Either of those things. She turned to Layla, a bit dizzy, realizing that she probably looked a bit crazed. Hopefully, her nose wasn’t bleeding. “See an exit?” she asked, her voice higher and a bit out of breath.

Following Mina to the next room, Layla wanted so badly to avoid the mirrors, but something caught the corner of her eye. Something she hadn’t seen in quite some time and left her heart racing. Moving forward to another mirror she saw the reflection again and quickly checked behind and around her, only to find an empty room aside from Mina. But the image, the person, was still there. In fact, when she finally looked at the mirror, she noticed two very familiar people staring back at her; her parents. By now Layla was on the verge of having a panic attack, and then her eyes went to a smaller version of herself. Her mother had a tight grip on her hand, one that felt like the bone was being crushed. The small child was screaming with tears fiercely rolling down her cheeks as she was pulled outside and into the backyard. “Kill it.” The words echoed in her mind as she refused and continued to cry, “I said kill it, Layla.” The words were firm and scary and as little Layla tried to pull away, she soon felt her mother pressing her down closer to the animal, “I swear to God, Layla Elizabeth, if you don’t do as you're told…”

Slowly, and with shaky hands, picking up a nearby knife laying near a cage that held a small rabbit, the redheaded child crawled forwards, but as she went to do as her mother was telling her, something deep inside stopped her. “Dammit, Child. Why are you so difficult?” Snatching the little girl up, she laid a firm hand on Layla’s cheek, before pushing her back to the ground. Taking the knife herself, Eliza opened the cage up and grabbed the rabbit. As both child Layla and the present version of herself watched in horror, a cry slipped from her lips leaving her sinking to the floor as suppressed memories seemed to come flooding back.

It was the shattering of glass and Mina’s voice that pulled Layla out of the place she was in. Wiping her eyes with her arm and remaining quiet, she got up off the floor. Through hazy hues, she scanned the room finally seeing an exit sign, and without saying much, began moving towards freedom, “This way.”

Claws retracting, webbing fading, scales nothing more than a few errant patches on the backs of her hands, Mina follows after Layla carefully, concern casting shadows over her features. The other girl seems even more shell shocked than Mina is, whatever she saw in her own mirrors just as if not worse than Mina’s visions. Mina reached out to touch Layla’s shoulder before she noticed her hands were covered blood and decided against it. Instead, she waited until they finally exited that hell of a hall of mirrors, her eyes blinking in the bright sunlight, before she turned to Layla. “Are you alright?” Layla didn’t look alright, and Mina was highly aware that it was a stupid question, but she had to ask it anyway because she certainly wasn’t alright, either. This furthered Mina’s dislike of mirrors, and it was likely that she’d managed to get herself cursed after breaking a magic one. What was the saying? Seven years of bad luck for breaking a mirror? Was it doubled if the mirror was a sinister creation designed to torment the minds of those that looked in it? Tripled? Quadrupled? At least other mirrors just showed her present flaws, not past or future ones. “This, ah, isn’t quite what I expected from a hall of mirrors.”

As the bright lights of the carnival overtook her sight, Layla found little relief in being outside. The visions of both the past and future had haunted her greatly. Mina’s question went through one ear and out the other, before she could fully process it, but when she finally did, she forced out a small lie not wanting to worry the girl next to her. But it was evident by the smell of blood coming from Mina’s hand, that her new friend wasn’t okay, “Uh, yeah. I’m fine. You might want to go get that looked at though.” She scanned the area for a first aid tent, before giving one last glance to the hall of mirrors, “I don’t know what kind of sick fucking joke that was, but whoever cursed those mirrors...let’s just say karma’s a bitch.” She forced back the anguish she was feeling as she spotted a tent with a cross on it, “Looks like medical is over there.” She pointed in the direction, “Do you want me to go with you?” Layla looked back to Mina waiting on an answer. 

“Medical?” Mina asked. Honestly, she hadn’t even been thinking about getting her hands treated. She’d planned on just wrapping them up until the next time she went swimming, which, most likely, would be after she left. But she was in public. “Ah, right, probably.” She willed the remainder of the scales to sink below her skin. She looked completely human, even if she wasn’t. “That was cruel and incredibly uncalled for, those mirrors.” She had no idea what the other girl might have seen, but it clearly affected her more than she was willing to say. Mina didn’t want to leave her alone. “You can come with me, if you’d like. And then perhaps we could grab some food here? The food can’t be bad, right?” 

The images from the mirrors had dredged up memories she thought she had repressed. The only thing holding her together was the fact that she was standing in front of Mina in a public place. Glancing around the carnival, Layla’s appetite and mood had gone out the door. Instead, she had just wanted to be home snuggled up with Indy. She looked back to the brunette and spoke, “I, uh…” She didn’t want to be rude, and she knew she hadn’t been the only one to experience whatever heartache the mirrors had revealed to Mina, “Sure.” With a soft, sad smile, she began walking further into the carnival. At least she wouldn’t be there alone and while the night had been horrific, so far, at least she had made a new friend. Nothing like bonding over traumatizing experiences brought on by cursed mirrors to get a friendship going, right?

[nodesiretogrowup]

alright, round 2

Quack Pack!:

Damn, they just throw you into the sitcom. I love it. All the overacting and over the top poses/reactions are great

Dewey’s entrance is great

Is the bear the one from the last episode?

“I’ve shenaned-once, I’ll shenan-again” BEAUTIFUL

And then he just one-legged hops up the stairs backwards

I liked the Della and Louie are both wearing green. It’s a cute thing to tie them together

ON THE MOOOOOOOOON

Louie totally did this scheme with Dewey in Della’s place at some point

The fact that Scrooge stops to entertain the idea is great

 “We’ve got about...30 mins” I love when shows make allusions to the actual runtime

Beakley and Webby had the BEST ENTRANCE! They must have seen the Lady Gaga halftime show

That dangerous agent stuff is probably gonna come back. Next week is the spy episode so...

“I’m not a spy” I wonder how that worked in the plot of the fake show. Did Beakley do spy stuff? It just doesn’t make sense for a sitcom

From the get-go Huey could tell things were off

WHY DID DONALD HAVE TO MAKE SUCH A SEXY FACE AT THE CAMERA?! I DON’T WANT TO HAVE A CRUSH ON DONALD! CURSE THE DT CREW FOR MAKING DONALD HOT! AND THE SEXY VOICE!

I wish they had just used the Quack Pack intro for the theme this episode

I want Launchpad’s band to somehow exist. I liked the girl’s design a lot

INTRODUCING DELLA!

“QUACK PACK WAS TAPED IN FRONT OF A LIVE STUDIO AUDIENCE.” Oh 90s sitcoms

When you rewatch the episode you can see they foreshadowed the twist. Donald looks directly into the camera an awful lot for someone that doesn’t know there even is a camera

Knox Quackington? Even for a show full of punny names, that is a ridiculous name

His outfit looks more “ace reporter” than “eccentric photographer”

“He’s a spy” Do you think Gene was trying to pretend to be a spy for the wacky misunderstanding of the episode in-universe or he just didn’t know how photographers act?

“YOU’RE SO SMALL! But so STRONG!” Webby has probably killed a man

The screen wipes are GREAT, though that feels more like an anime thing than sitcom. Sitcom scene wipes usually were establishing shots of the house they live in or the city. I’ve watched far too much tv

Louie’s lie speil was great and solid logic

“Time is money, kids, and I’d rather spend time because it’s not money” Inspirational

Donald sure cares a lot about the lighting. How would he know the office had the best lighting, hmmmmm

Something about that hand movement makes me think 90s but I’m not sure why

Dewey doing the dance that the triplets do in Mr. Duck Steps Out is cute

The blank pages made me think about how people can’t read in their dreams

“On the moon we had this old saying-always check your pockets” To be fair, that is good advice

Poor Huey just CAN’T catch a break! First he hallucinates a talking guidebook (THAT BURNS TO DEATH AND COMES BACK AS A GHOST) now reality is SHATTERING BEFORE HIM. Yeah...this season’s gonna do a number on this kid. Hopefully he gets a break next week

“Since when are YOU a hairstylist?” “SINCE THE INTERNET” Now THAT is a quarantine MOOD right there 

So we learn later that SHABOOEY is Gene’s catchphrase, is Dewey saying it because he’s being controlled by Gene in that moment? 

Donald looks into the camera again

SOMEONE HELP THIS CHILD! HIS WORLD IS SPINNING OUT OF CONTROL

THE FUCKING PEP COMMERCIAL! GOD IT WAS SO 90S AND BEAUTIFUL!! I NEED THE SONG TO BE RELEASED! 

Maybe because it was a soda ad in a Disney Afternoon-based show, but the commercial made me think of Coo-Coo Cola from Rescue Rangers

Ducktales-the ONLY Disney show with an in-universe “and you’re watching Disney Channel”

I love Huey dearly but....it’s really fun watching him MCFRICKIN LOSE IT

Dewey can’t throw...because he’s a theatre kid

Donald looks at the camera again

Louie’s wipe DEFINITELY looks like something out of an anime. Is Louie secretly a weeb? I mean he is in a different show

Gene doing his best not to break character. A true thespian through and through

“Yo” *all the ladies cheer*

All of the sudden BAM Launchpad has a band. Is he the Uncle Jesse?

I love that we don’t get to hear them play

“Trapped in a mystical prison that’s constantly laughing at us” I call that my brain :’)

“WHO ARE THOSE LITTLE GUYS?”

“I figured if anyone would crack, it’d be Dewey” Huey seems WAY more likely to snap imho

“But that was from soul-crushing loneliness” Della, you wanna talk about that? With a professional perhaps?

“We need some wacky hijinks!”

“HOW DID I GET HERE? WHY AM I DANCING?” Huey gets SO MANY great lines this episode

And once again we have Donald looking directly into the camera

“Cute girl stuff” Della probably went around with a meat tenderizer as a kid, so it’s normal

Goofy seemed to be aware of the cheering. HMMMMMMM

AAAAAAAAAAAAND.....GOOF TROOP POSE

I’ve been calling DT17 Goofy Chibi Goofy because of how short he is compared to how he normally looks. They probably made him shorter so he and Donald fit in a single frame easier. I know a lot of the boarders/animators for the show have a hard time doing scenes with Launchpad and the kids because of how MASSIVE he is compared to the kids

Goofy knew something was different about Donald. HMMMMMMM

The way Don delivers the line “You CAN help” has a weird inflection, at least to me

I want Goofy thinking to become a meme and people put random sounds over it like those are Goofy’s thoughts

That face-slap was loud

AND DONALD LOOKS INTO THE CAMERA LIKE HE’S ON THE OFFICE

Where was Dewey that whole time? He kind of just...disappears for a bit

Oh Launchpad, you MAJESTIC himbo. And Gene smiles, too cute

“Getting the lid off that peanut butter jar was an adventure” In that household it probably could have

Donald using Louie and Della’s names when he could have just said you broke your mom’s vase or something like that

You look pretty nervous there, Donny-boy

“I don’t mean the last episode” Good, because you kinda lost your mind in the last episode

Wow, flashbacking is TRIPPY

“EVERYONE, TILT YOUR HEAD TO THE LEFT THEN SCRATCH YOUR CHIN” So that’s how you do it

“We should really get back to the plot, I mean problem”

Why don’t you want to flashback, DONALD?

lol Goofy does it too even though he wasn’t present for that event

Gene’s just blankly staring in the background

“REMINISCE HARDER” What you tell yourself as you take a test and are trying to remember what you studied

Yay, the journal is brought up!

“How many lamps did this jerk have?” Excellent question

Webby looks INSANE and Huey FULLY SUPPORTS HER

DONALD HAS PTSD AND NEEDS HELP

I feel like Gene took some MAJOR liberties with Donald’s wish. When I think normal family problems I don’t think of sitcoms. In fact that is the FURTHEST THING from what I think of as normal. Then again Gene is played by Urkel, so that might be his normal

Speaking of, does Gene know that they are all ALREADY in a tv show? How far does this rabbit hole go?

“EVERYONE STOP CATCHPHRASING!” “Is ‘I’m not a spy’ seriously my catchphrase?” You deserve better, Beakley

Of COURSE Dewey’s cool with it...because he’s a theatre kid

DEAR LORD, SOMEONE HELP THIS MAN!

Gene just trying to sneak out. I don’t think he wanted to deal with all that family drama

“HOW MANY MORE SECRETS DOES THIS AGENT HAVE?!” Oh Launchpad. Next week you’ll learn all about secrets and agents and secret agents

Gene feels like what would happen if all of Genie’s pop culture references were limited to the 90s. I LOVE IT

“AGES! The long ago year of 1990!” Well I feel old (born in 91). His eyes after he says it are just AMAZING

Gene being so knowledgeable about what makes great tv is hilarious. Clearly he should have directed the Darkwing movie lol

Seriously though, this really gives us a good look at Donald’s psyche. The guy just wants his family to be safe. But it’s even deeper than that. He wants to be normal, which includes him having a voice that’s easier for people to understand. He’s got a lot of baggage and trauma that needs to be dealt with, mainly how he views himself. Like, fuck

The HURT you see in Della’s eyes when Donald talks about why he likes it there BROKE ME

Huey’s line about adventuring being who they are got me teary eyed

Goofy just shrugs as he walks out

Of course Launchpad was gonna get the multiple dates plot. We’re ALL thirsty for some Launchpad

“Probably at least 3 seasons, plus spinoffs, and I assume they’ll reboot the show eventually.” Lines like this make me think Gene is very aware he is in a tv show

WHY THE FUCK WERE THE AUDIENCE HUMANS?! IS GENE AWARE THAT HUMANS EXIST AND ARE WATCHING THE VERY SHOW HE’S ON?! WHAT IS REAL ANYMORE?!

 “HORRIBLE, FLESH-FACED MONSTERS!” Not gonna argue with that

Dewey is SUCH a drama queen

I don’t like how Scrooge called Gene genie. He told you his name, there’s no need to be rude

POGS

Ok the study date girl kinda reminds me of Laura from Family Matters, but that might just be because Urkel is there lol

How old is Launchpad supposed to BE in the sitcom? I don’t think a 30-something is going on many study dates

“You all seem real nice, I feel bad about the mix-up” LAUNCHPAD YOU BEAUTIFUL HIMBO

OH GOD THE LAURA DUCK IN THE BACKGROUND. JESUS

Beakley and Della telling the dates to find themselves and to be independent SLAYED ME. I was NOT expecting that!

“AH, MY PET SNAKE!” “Louie why would you have this?” “THIS IS A POORLY CONCEIVED STORYLINE!” “Eh, everyone’s a critic.” Louie’s right though, DEWEY would be the one with an exotic pet. Or any pet

Tiny Johnny and Randy

WHY ARE THE HUMAN KIDS’ PROPORTIONS SO MUCH WORSE THAN THE ADULTS?! THEY HAVE GIANT FUCKING HEADS!

 PUT SOME PEP IN YOUR STEP

The ENTIRE SCENE of Goofy and Donald together was SO HEARTWARMING and something we could NEVER GET before this series!  Having Donald and Goofy talk about being parents is WONDERFUL! It’s something we’ve never seen before with these characters. Donald just wants to be normal and Goofy giving a beautiful speech about how there really is no normal so enjoy the candid moments in life. I LEGIT CRIED

OF COURSE Goofy would have the wallet overflowing with pictures, he is THAT DAD. Seeing Max was great. I thought we might see PJ but I SQUEE’D when they showed the picture of Max and Roxanne! I hope they show up for real later on

We get a hint at the OTHER twist here with Goofy actively encouraging Donald to put things back to normal while everyone else that aren’t the Duck family are trying to keep them there

Also, Goofy’s ears have bones

DON’T MESS WITH DONALD’S FAMILY. It will NOT end well for you

Goofy just starts snapping pics, like the true photographer he is

SAX TIME

“LET’S GET QUACKING” It’s no “I AM THE STORM” but still good

AVENGERS CAMERA SPIN

“A lamp in a lamp?” I can’t tell if that is BRILLIANT or lazy. Or BRILLIANTLY LAZY

“YA HA HA HOOOOWIIIIIEEEEE” It wouldn’t be a proper Goofy cameo without the yell

The scorpions got bored and left

 “The sound of no one laughing never sounded SO GOOD”

“BEST EPISODE EVER!” Definitely in my top 5

“Gawrsh, that’s sweet.” *does a cute wave* “Wait, Goofy was really here this whole time?”

Ok, but where was Goofy before then? Did Gene poof him away from something important? I WANT ANSWERS!

I bet they had this bit so people wouldn’t freakout like they did with Darkwing

I love Launchpad just being confused and waving at Goofy. He’s never met the dude before so it’s understandable. But I NEED they to have a proper interaction. THING OF THE PROPERTY DAMAGE!

“Magic’s got NOTHIN’ on a big name guest star” YOU KNOW YOU’RE IN A SHOW!

Lowkey want that Goofy lava lamp

The little Maxes flying over Goofy’s head...ADORABLE

PLEASE TELL ME THEY GOT GOOFY HOME SAFE

Donald using his last wish on the picture made me tear up. He could have had ANYTHING. He could have wished for a normal voice. But he used it for a family memory

Donald and Beakley both looked into the camera for the picture. WHILE FIGHTING DEMON HUMANS.

I can’t lie, THIS was the episode I was most excited for even before we got the premiere date. I was excited for the 90s cheesiness. Then we found out Goofy was gonna be in it and I got even more excited. Goofy is one of my faves, especially Dad Goofy. I was expecting it to be balls-to-the-wall insanity nonstop but they got me in the feels too. I want more of this Goofy and Donald. The two of them being single parents who lost someone close to them. Like I said earlier, this episode is in my top 5 for sure.

[musicreviewbfox]

Chromatica

The Album Chromatica is Lady Gaga’s newest album. It’s a new album not only in the sense that it marks her return to being an Enigma to the general public again. But this album also uncovers how the artist behind Lady Gaga has been feeling and hopes to reach out to people. She hopes to reach out to her fans. The album its self is almost a love letter to not only Stefani the woman behind the mask of Lady Gaga. But Chromatica is an album to let others join in on her own self-love affair. Chromatica has three string arrangments that are key to dividing up the album from Resentment and depression to Entrapment and PTSD and lastly ends in a blanket of upbeat pop rhythms where Stefani assures herself that she is making an everlasting impression on not only her fans but the music industry itself. 

 I didn't ask for a free ride

I only asked you to show me a real good time

I never asked for the rainfall

At least I showed up, you showed me nothing at all

The beginning lyrics of Rain on Me by Lady Gaga and Ariana Grande form a beautiful entry to the depressive side of Chromatica after Lady Gaga drops us into Chromatica with Alice and ensuring that Chromatica runs on everlasting Stupid Love. Rain on Me is different from its predecessor in which Stefani admits that the love-filled joy trip she had has finally come to halt and she is left yet again broken-hearted. She dissects the struggle she now faces being alone and admitted by herself in interviews “A fountain of misery for tears to pour out of”(Spotify). This everlasting presence continues with the lyrics.

It's coming down on me

Water like misery

It's coming down on me

I'm ready, rain on me

We are reminded that this is the mesmeric miserable state that Gaga and Ariana are in with the lyrics but the beat in the background of Rain on me is a heavy bass and beat to carry the singers on and be able to channel that miserable energy into fighting dance styles as displayed in the music video that they both appear in. Gaga leading the front of the pink tribe and Ariana with the purple tribe. Both singers are seen in Mad Max outfits which is the setting of Chromatica. A dystopian world where all ideas are challenged and the only way to survive is to dance away the pain or love you feel. Which carries us to Ariana’s lyrics 

Living in a world where no one's innocent

Oh, but at least we try

Gotta live my truth, not keep it bottled in

So I don't lose my mind

Baby, yeah

I can feel it on my skin

It's coming down on me

Teardrops on my face

Water like misery

Let it wash away my sins

It's coming down on me

Let it wash away

 Ariana comes in with massive vocals and is able to quickly catch up to Lady Gaga in terms of performance. In an hour-long interview with Zane Lowe this was one of the hardest parts of the song for both Ariana and Gaga. Ariana reportedly felt overwhelmed and felt like she couldn’t keep with Gaga until Lady Gaga pulled her out of the booth, determined Gaga said “you are gonna sing as you’ve never done before, while I dance in the corner”. That’s exactly what happened and Ariana outdid herself with many fans and critics saying that the high notes Ariana not only hit while in the studio were astounding but the high notes she hit on the VMA’s matched up to why the duo worked so well together on this record. This now brings us to some closing lyrics

I'd rather be dry, but at least I'm alive

Rain on me, rain, rain

Rain on me, rain, rain

I'd rather be dry, but at least I'm alive

Rain on me, rain, rain

Rain on me

I hear the thunder coming down, won't you rain on me?

Rain on me

I hear the thunder coming down, won't you rain on me?

Rain on me

The final lyrics of Rain On Me show how Ariana and Gaga are prepared for any more trials to come in the future. The duo is prepared for whatever comes their way and are ready for the misery that the tears of regret and broken love may give them. Love being a recurring theme is Chromatica so far in the first section means that it won’t be overplayed and overdone as you the reader will see which is really one of my only criticisms of this album.

The next song that we’ll cover on the Chromatica album is Replay. The song Replay has a lot to do with much of Lady Gaga’s PTSD and Trauma responses to the violent attacks she suffered at 17 and 19. The middle of Lady Gaga’s album is much more of her pained past and how she chooses to come through the other end is with music. Lady Gaga heals as reported is through music. Lady Gaga reported in a Spotify/genius interview. “I refused to not allow this song to be on the album. Sure, I’m the “boss. But really chromatica cannot exist without an abstract explanation of what it’s like to be triggered if you have PTSD.”. So with the explanation of the reason why the track exists at all, it’s now to dive into the lyrics of Replay. 

Am I still alive?

Where am I, I cry

Who was it that pulled the trigger, was it you or I?

I'm completely numb

Why you acting dumb

I won't blame myself 'cause we both know you were the one 

In the beginning Lady Gaga questions if she is still alive much like how she reports in her song 911 at the beginning of the second act of Chromatica is if she is still sane and can’t escape the voices in her head during a manic episode. She again feels trapped but an outer source forcing her to relive a traumatic experience that she feels undeserving of. The questions of why does my existence amount to this, why was I the chosen out of so many people, why can’t I escape this anguish and misery. Gaga takes all of these questions and puts them as a side focus to have the answer put in front of people. Lady Gaga believes she isn’t a savior but rather looking to take the pain she’s delt and expresses it through music cause in the same interview Gaga says “ And the very thing that plagued my mind for years, trauma, is precisely the thing that now powers my lifeforce to be braver. I.e. this voice I hear- continue to make music although your brain feels it’s breaking sometimes.”. This brings us to the next set of lyrics 

Every single day, yeah I dig a grave

Then I sit inside it, wondering if I'll behave

It's a game I play, and I hate to say

You're the worst thing and the best thing that's happened to me

What Lady Gaga is trying to submit here is with her vocals radiating up and down a registry key is that she is condemning herself for feeling the pain and relieving the trauma she is experience. She continues to feel this pain and she questions is it her or the monsters that have been created in her head that force her to feel this way. She questions if she even cares about the damage being done to her mentally and physically and if she is paying the price for a much higher power for being the way she is. 

Psychologically, it's something that I can't explain

Scratch my nails into the dirt to pull me out of pain

Does it matter, does it matter? Damage is done

Does it matter, does it matter? You had the gun

You had the gun

You had the gun

You had the gun 

In the last lyrics of Replay, we the audience get a full picture described to us of how Lady Gaga is fighting the monsters in her mind and how she is trying to break free from a fire zone. A red zone in which every step causes pain and misery but Lady Gaga fights this torture by dancing and singing against it. She uses her music to help balance herself once and remind herself that she is ready to keep going and fight these monsters every time they replay.

I need you to listen to me, please believe me

I'm completely lonely, please don't judge me

In the sing 1000 Doves we get a different side of Lady Gaga, the side she’s sheltered and kept away from the world, aside she is ready to nourish and feed love again. That side of Gaga is Stefani. Lady Gaga put an alter ego in the spotlight and hid away Stefani the person and mind behind Gaga away from the world. She kept Stefani away and in this song she tells Lady Gaga she finally gets to meet the person who had the hard path and tough road to ride to fame and fortune. Stefani the woman who stuck around whenever everyone left her. Stefani endured many hard times and never got to fully understand and put into motion how her Trauma and battles against those that deposed her especially at her time in NYU Tisch. The next set of lyrics describe the passion and love that Stefani has for Lady Gaga.

When your tears are falling, I'll catch them as they fall

I need you to listen to me, please don't leave me

I'm not perfect yet but I'll keep trying

When your tears are falling, I'll catch them as they fall

In these sets of lyrics, Stefani is the singer and at the reigns. You can tell that this is Stefani coming through because she is saying she is always ready to catch Gaga’s tears as she falls apart no matter where and or why. Stefani has healed and is always ready for the net challenge. She was born ready for fame because of the humiliation she faced growing up. Misunderstood and abused was Stefani and so she took all the pain and formed an alter ego to protect from the world which is Lady Gaga. which is complex because the song seems like a love ballad to another person she vows to protect but in reality, it is a love letter to Lady Gaga from Stefani and how she is ready to combine to the two and have them heal one another.

I've been hurting, stuck inside a cage

So hot my heart's been in a rage

If you love me, then just set me free

And if you don't, then baby leave

Set me free

In these final lyrics, we get a showcase of what it was like for Stefani to finally meet the creation she helped launch into stardom. A woman she doesn’t know almost because of how long it been since shes played a role in Gaga’s life. Not since the Artpop have the two been in hand deep of creating music as Stefani has had the reigns in the last couple of years with Cheek to Cheek, Joanne, and A Star is Born. But Stefani knows the woman who brought the stardom and first captured the world’s attention which is Lady Gaga. So at the end of this song, the two recollect and remember how hard it was for Lady Gaga and Stefani to receive the credit that they’ve held onto for over a decade now.  

A thousand do-o-o-o-o-o-ves

Oh-oh

Flying, flying, flying like a thousand doves

A thousand do-o-o-o-o-o-ves

Flying, flying, flying like a thousand doves

Flying, flying, flying like a thousand doves

Flying, flying, flying

With these lyrics I abid you a good morning, afternoon, or night on our journey of Chromatica. Overall the main takeaways of Chromatica as an album are that Lady Gaga wrote this album as a self-love note much like in the ways of Ariana Grande did with sweetener, Kesha did with Rainbow, and what many artists do with self-titled albums or more depending on how long they’ve been in the music industry. But the core points to take away from Chromatica is that hardships are expected and what you can expect for Stefani or even Lady gaga to do with those hardships is to write music and dance the pain away. Either is be a traumatizing experience in Replay, a broken heart in Rain on Me, or even a question of self-worth in 1000 Doves. Gaga will and forever make music for those who feel like an underdog and had many crazy experiences.

 Links:

https://genius.com/Lady-gaga-1000-doves-lyrics

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CZXBF9t32zA

https://www.rollingstone.com/music/music-features/lady-gaga-chromatica-making-of-bloodpop-axwell-1007139/

https://genius.com/Lady-gaga-and-ariana-grande-rain-on-me-lyrics

https://genius.com/Lady-gaga-replay-lyrics