#mono is also pretty effective afaik
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ok 9 days
#this new date gives me more time#any clarity from last night is gone#it’s gotta be the ritalin or soemthing#my view of myself really does change everyday#i think i will have to get shoulder surgery i really don’t like this feeling#the issue is that if i really want to fully transition#without long wait times or having to look androgynous for ages#is to do estrogen mono therapy#which means ordering vials from eastern europe and injecting it a couple times a week#apparently high doses of estrogen can simulate growth plate closure so that’s my only hope of not getting taller#only other option is to convince parents to get it surgically done which i don’t really want#mono is also pretty effective afaik#and it also prevents the bone density issues#also if i go on e in early teens i should get decently feminine bones#i think for height i just need to stop wearing thick shoes#it’ll lose me an inch and that’s about enough#i’m still not final on my decision though#i think i’d rather be a decent looking man and hate myself than be an awful looking non passing trans woman and also hate myself#why is life so unfair
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