#moms pain was so bad she couldnt do the dishwasher today ha. dad doesnt really do much of anything anymore. which. fair.

[sunshine-in-a-bottle]

Venting. Yay. You guys want to go out for ice cream?

What's the point of all this, man. I am in Semi Constant Pain, I'm exhausted, and when I'm not exhausted I'm manic, and sometimes I'm both at the same time. Music is my favorite thing in the world and yet I don't want to touch my schoolwork. Family's grumpy because I can't tell them what job I'll get with my degree and how much money it'll make. I can't take care of my parents, or my sister, or my beloved like this; I can barely take care of myself.

I feel fucking terrible being envious of the little block gamers, but. They have money. They own their houses. They get to play a game I love with their friends. They get to talk to people as a chat or on a zoom instead of feeling terror from being surrounded.

I don't want a mansion or a bazillion dollars. I just want to be safe. I want everyone I care about to be safe.