#momdate

[nolamusings]

Out with the boy for Smashburger. #momdate 💜 https://www.instagram.com/p/Bpxhm0AFYU_/?utm_source=ig_tumblr_share&igshid=4c6m75u3apw8

[lucegoods]

Yes Friday ! @fernbar.sebastopol #momdate #friday https://www.instagram.com/p/CTGbM5iFvyh/?utm_medium=tumblr

[anauseyourtelescope]

Because the only thing I was ever early for was my birth. (And we were recovering from disney tans the other day) ✌⛅👭 Happy mother's day (ya filthy animal) @oldcountryroses2 #belated #mothersday #adventuretime #rideordie #pic #partnerincrime #disneyaddict #disneyworld #qualitytime #shescute #momdate (at Disney's Hollywood Studios)

[katekatebear]

Motown mama 😎🎶💃 So much fun with moms & music at @hippodromebway @motownmusical! Only one request: please more numbers we're allowed to get up & dance to! #goodvibes #motown #motownmusical #broadway #momdate (at Hippodrome Theatre at the France-Merrick Performing Arts Center)

[scottaenator]

#momdate with my sweet girl and new inventory @bellemercantile head on over to #bellefontepa @explorebellefontepa and check out our new pieces!!! Have some #psu #diffuserearrings #mtnittanycreations (at Belle Mercantile) https://www.instagram.com/p/CGLPLfaAia1/?igshid=gpgthy5w4fzw

[happierthandignified]

Breakfast date with mom. 🍳🥓☕ #breakfast #momdate (at Mr Joe's Grill & Drive Thru)

[getwokegirl]

Five years we’ve known each other, since our daughters were still in their wombs, but tonight was the first time ever hanging out sans kiddos. #momdate #friends #friendship #winetime (at Twigs Bistro) https://www.instagram.com/p/B2lHWEsJoiJ/?igshid=qtr2itgy4ea7

[katbalogger]

My soul twin and I at dinner last night. Because @ocharleys lets kids eat free and they have free pie. So much fun getting to eat steak & hang with @anneycat & @thegrimmlynn #ocharleys #dinnerout #momdate (at O'Charley's Restaurant + Bar) https://www.instagram.com/p/B1xTE9uDC3_/?igshid=1xnzq96ozug4x

[runningkitten]

This year #focusing what matters to me. Trying to find #balance between #racing, #family, #work and my #personaltime is not easy. Though my #workouts have been affected I needed that #timeoff. Time to #focus on those #uncomfortable #moments again... #lamami #familytime #elotes #countyfair #momdate #wine (at Alameda County Fair) https://www.instagram.com/p/BzUcdiGADat/?igshid=krhowwe1pjf3

[oozeinspiration]

Have a damn fine #tacotuesday everyone!! I’d much rather eat the heat than be out in the heat! Yuck, 🥵 it’s too hot to go out today. I’m countering my negativity with #gratitude though. Today I’m grateful for AC, popsicles and delicious #mexicanfood .. . #pinktaco #shrimptaco #claseazultequila #stayingcool #begrateful #dailygratitude #selpreservation #eatwell #healthyfood #foodporn #healthychoices #momdate #healthandwellness #feelgood #happinesswins #colorinspo #eatwithyoureyes #oozeinspo https://www.instagram.com/p/BykyVStAYp1/?igshid=owk299dyh5kq

[thehollydoll]

Deez babes my faves 💛💗💙 @pinkbarbiemom007, @amberofages and I are coming over when I get home from la! #momdate #playdate #drinkinstarbucksandtalkinshit #mamagang #girlgang #tattooedmoms #allthecolors

[mikeyslifeondisplay]

So instead of being “ladies who lunch” like we do every Sunday, mom is coming to my place so I had to stop at the grocery store and get all the essentials that a proper #hostess should have. #igotchucovered #gayAF #momdate #instamom #boyswholovetheirmoms #mommasboy #IDGAF https://www.instagram.com/p/Bu1sQ0ZnB-LxTTR4YyyL57eM6ZJWkTbjL3u-Fs0/?utm_source=ig_tumblr_share&igshid=13jl3p0g7ww2c

[secondchancecourtney]

During this game we have started a business, found a new favourite lip colour and taken a lot of selfies.... and sometimes paid attention. #firstgameoftheseason #jays #momdate (at Rogers Centre)

[thefallofsydnitroy]

Great time at the pumpkin patch with my mom! #momdate #bestfriend #shesthebest #familyfirst #yomomma #fall #pumpkinpatch (at Kregel's Pumpkin Patch)

[moniikascott]

It's hard to control our excitement when we see food, especially brunch. ☕ Thanks to @chan.vinnie for taking cute pics for us 📷❤ #LifeofElisha #brunch #momdates (at La Forêt Bakery & Coffee) https://www.instagram.com/p/B0HDFLbgReZ/?igshid=1g9oxjd8f402p

[findingmyami]

The long road that leads to you (and the end of this post).

When I was 25 years of age, one day before my wedding, I discovered I was pregnant. It was a shock, which is not to say it wasn’t planned. I had been told that, due to a recent emergency surgery removing an ovary and fallopian tube, it  would take me longer than the average bear to conceive. This turned out to be categorically untrue and and my one ovary continued to be a powerhouse that has since helped create two more beautiful, healthy beings. 

After taking in the fact that my body was capable of such a thing, the reality of my new life set in. Despite the overwhelming joy felt by our family, I felt alone in my journey. As far as my friends went, I was a pioneer on the family frontier: first to buy a house, get married, and have a baby. I felt old before my time. The loneliness was palpable. 

I consider myself an introvert. The energy I need to expend in order to socialize effectively leaves me depleted. I recharge alone. But a village is not built by hanging out with your dogs and watching Bethany Getting Married (my pregnant brain is not sharp enough to take in complicated story lines). I needed to put myself out there. How?

Enter Meetup.com. The modern age is really quite a thing. Technology divides us and isolates us but also brings us together, in the most practical of ways. Meet people who share your interests! But of course! How did our parents do this? Who cares?! I’m so happy to have these tools at my disposal, I can hardly take the time to romanticize the way our forebears playdated. 

As a good friend advised me before we moved to Miami, “Say yes to everything.” And then of course, show up. That is the tricky part, and also the most crucial. I forgot how hard it is. Here I am, almost 7 years after my first baby, having to make myself vulnerable all over again. That’s how community is built. You say yes, you show up, you bare your soul, and then you love your butt off. 

6 years ago, with a new baby, I showed up and showed up and showed up. It takes a long time to find your people. 

Some were too far. I traveled many miles from my home for a lot of events because I didn’t think I would find my people close to home. Spoiler alert: I was wrong.

Some were too different. Different is amazing and necessary, don’t get me wrong. I don’t care about your economic status, or where you live, or what you wear. I care about what’s in your heart and what you are willing to show. As I’ve grown to know myself, I know I need people who wear their heart on their sleeve, at least once in a while. Life is too short to pretend to be who others want us to be, and to not share our truths. If we can’t be real together, I just ain’t got time for that.

So I continued to make plans, and sit through discomfort and sometimes boredom. I listened and I shared. And it happened. I found my people. I hit the mom friend JACKPOT. 

Meetup.com. That old gem. Tom and I once used it to meet fellow husky owners. If you have an interest, no matter how weird, there are people out there who want to discuss it and share it with you. I found my zany, enthusiastic, loveably weird dog people. My mom people had to be out there, too. 

The Church Hill Meetup was a couple of towns over, in the highfalutin community of Norwell, Massachusetts. My hopes were not high. However, I have had great luck in church basements before (friends of Bill W. will understand) so I braced myself and entered with an open heart.

Stacey radiated love and kindness. I had never met anyone like her. She was practicing service and she didn’t even need to. I only do service because I need it to stay alive and sane. There are people who do service because it’s right and good. Incredible! 

My first thought was, Wow. Followed by, why? Why would someone like her want to be friends with me? Middle school self esteem rears its ugly head again! I was very pregnant with Lou Lou, flanked by my little Delia who was close in age with Stacey’s son, Nolan. I met kindness with kindness and opened myself up to love.

Emily came on the scene soon thereafter. Her kids’ names alone told me she was my kind of gal. Here was someone who knew who she was. She was unapologetic. She was interesting, fun and so, extremely funny. I’ve been hooked ever since.

I am thinking of these two friends especially today because they left Miami days ago, visiting me, as part of a surprise birthday gift schemed with my husband, and I am still bursting with gratitude over the whole darn thing. We shared some meals, some tears and so much laughter. The memories will get me through many of the lonely days that inevitably come with living in a new place. 

Friends are not just company or therapy, although those things are great. To me, it’s about having witnesses to our lives. I am existing in this crazy world, raising little people, doing the next right thing, and there are people who acknowledge this and appreciate it. It’s validating and life affirming. My greatest fear in moving to Miami, was that this would cease to happen. And in turn, it’s almost as if I would cease to be. My feelings, my baby’s milestones, my first grader’s travails, my preschooler’s first friend, my marriage, decorating our beautiful home, leaping into new adventures- would all these things be happening in a vacuum? 

Now I feel certain that my friends and I are imprinted on each other in ways that defy distance. I’m so glad that I showed up, and they showed up, and we all continue show up (even if it takes a plane ride and a sketchy Lyft driver!) and that we all took a chance on each other.