#mloneshot

[minetteenfers]

Is There Any Life On Mars?

Warning: Suicidal thoughts, depression, anxiety, hurt and comfort ahead

Marinette sat in her bedroom with her head in her hands and her sketchbook open. Deep lines of blue ink raked across the page in a haphazard. Some of the lines cut deep through the pages like she had poured her anger and sadness into each gouge and cut. Tears coated the pages in places and she was so tired, exhausted, and her legs didn’t want to work. Her soul was heavy and her heart ached. Her faded blue eyes burned from hours of crying. She had no one. No one wanted to be her friend anymore, since Lila spilled the rumors about her. She didn’t feel good enough at her so-called talents. Didn’t have the motivation to try anymore.

She breathed in a shaky breath that rattled before silently crying again. She just wanted to end it, wanted the pain in her chest to stop. Wanted the claws around her throat to stop gripping it and making it so hard to breathe in one breath of fresh air. Her parents were upset at her, the school was upset at her, her friends hated her, and Adrien was with Kagami. Nothing mattered to her anymore. Nothing.

And one mistake landed Ladybug to be seen as a disappointment. She flung her head down into her folded arms and burst into silent tears again, unaware that she had more to give after hours of torment. Her stomach flipped as the tears stained her arms. She could just end it all. She could move away where everyone would love her. Where she could make new friends and maybe her old friends would love her again if she was successful. If she just sold everything and made a new life for herself. If she made up a new identity and dyed her hair. If she wore bolder fashion choices and was more outgoing. If she just tried a little harder to be like everyone else.

She gripped her hair and slammed her elbows down on her desk. The negative thoughts plagued her mind and kept doing circles. She was scared. Scared that she would end it right here and right now.

Marinette peered up at her ceiling with trembling lips, raking her hands down her face and gripping her forearms to dig her nails into her soft flesh. She wanted out. Wanted out of her life and body. Wanted to be loved like Adrien did Kagami. She wanted to be her. Wanted someone to accept her for being herself and at this point, she doubted that anyone ever would.

A light tapping on her skylight made her perk up. She quickly rubbed the tears away and sniffed, standing up and going to hide when she heard the small trap door opening.

“Princess?” A familiar voice called out and she panted beneath her desk with her knees to her chest. “Are you in here? Sorry to drop in, I was just- I heard that some people were worried about you.”

“ No one is worried about me .” Her voice came out groggy and weak.

“Well…” Chat leaped down and crouched down to smile at her. “I’m worried about you.”

“Why?” She kept her face buried in her folded arms. “Why do you care? I’m a liar and- and I screwed up.”

“You didn’t screw up, Marinette. And you’re not a liar.” Chat sighed and sat down on the floor with his legs criss-crossed.

“You don’t know that. You hang out with Ladybug, who screwed up, and now the world hates her too.” Marinette burst out into tears and flung her hand up, cursing when she smacked it against the underside of her desk. “Ow.”

“Well, I think I know you a bit and you are the most honest person I know.” Chat shrugged and gripped his shin. “Hey, want to vent about it? I won’t tell anyone. Scouts honor.” He gestured to solidify it and his ears went back when he noticed she didn’t giggle like she used to. “I’m sorry, Princess. Talk to me.” He leaned forward to crawl closer, poking her shoulder. “Please? I don’t like to see you so upset.” He purred and nudged her shoulder with his head. “Please?”

She shoved him slightly, “Would you stop being such a cat?”

“Not until you tell me what’s wrong.” Chat curled up beside her and peered up at her.

“I- Lila told the school that I was a liar and that I had done all of these horrible things. Like I had pushed her in the hallway and threatened her in the bathroom. That I had told her horrible things that I didn’t say. And- and instead of my best friends taking my side-” Marinette burst into tears and spoke with her hands. “-they believed her over me. BUT SHE’S THE LIAR! Not me.” Marinette poked her chest with her fingers. “-I got in trouble with the school and in turn my parents. And then- then I find out that the love of my life is dating this girl that has threatened me. I- my heart can’t take it. I’m tired. So tired. I can’t draw. I’m uninspired and all I wanna do is sit and cry. I’m empty and sad. I’m worthless. I-” She peered up at Chat with swollen red eyes and trembling lips. “-Tell me, is there any life on Mars?”

Chat stared at her with a sad expression, and she burst out with an irritated sound. “I could move away and make a new life for myself. I could change my hair color and name. I could get new friends! I could just end it all and no one would care. No one would care if I just disappeared. ”

Chat’s eyes widened at her last comment and he suddenly was up and yanking her into his lap. He held her and ran his fingers through her hair. “Never say that. Never tell me those words. You are Marinette Dupain-Cheng, amazing designer, and my close friend. You are not worthless or a liar and a whole… bunch of people would care if you were gone. Me included.”

“ I need help .” Marinette weakly admitted that she needed to see a therapist. She needed someone to save her from herself and she hated to admit that. She peered up at him with dark rings beneath her eyes. “ Help me .”

Chat Noir nodded and lifted her, taking her out the trap door and across Paris to a place that he knew would help her. She would be lying if she wasn’t scared of the bold name outside of the therapy building that seemed to try to promote hope. She'd be lying if she wasn’t afraid of what it meant to make an appointment there. That it would solidify the fact that she really was insane and needed help. That she-

Her thoughts got distracted as a familiar soft, leather-coated, hand curled around hers. “It’s okay. It’s okay to need help. We all need it. I’ll get help too. Just not today. Tomorrow morning.” He kissed the top of her head and nodded for her to step forward towards the door.

Marinette’s hand slowly fell from his as she nervously walked towards the door. “I’m scared.” The words fell from her lips in a trembled whisper.

“I know, but you’re gonna be okay. You’re not just the most honest girl I know? You’re also the strongest. It’s all going to be okay and they’ll help you. The real trick is… you need to want help for it to work and I think you do.” Chat weakly smiled and watched her nod and leave inside.

***

Marinette walked into group therapy, expecting it to be just as awkward as the day she first showed up. Her heart raced and her anxiety ran rampant. Thoughts spiraled again in her mind as she worried about everyone liking her. She thought they would all find her to be a liar anyway. She didn’t want to sit by anyone. She didn’t want to speak. She just wanted to leave and run away. She sighed and peered up from her shoes and froze in her spot. A familiar boy with golden hair sat in a chair and he seemed to perk up when he saw her.

She looked around herself, unsure of whether it was really her that he was talking to. I mean he was famous, he was Adrien Agreste, it could be anyone. She was wondering if she was dreaming. If this was even a reality.

He pat the chair beside him and she blushed, excusing herself through the circle of chairs to sit beside him.

She placed her hand between the chairs to grip the edge, a nervous tic she had picked up, as more people filed in. Adrien slowly took her hand into his and brushed his thumb along the back of her hand to calm her down.

He warmly smiled at her, catching her panicked gaze with his, and whispered words that she never thought would come out of the love of her life’s mouth. “Hey, Bugaboo. Is there any life on Mars?”

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Story inspired by this song that I’m obsessed with: