#might be slightly delulu
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dirtytransmasc · 1 year ago
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Loving the vibe of Izzy and Stede... I won't say their necessarily getting along quite yet, I don't want to jinx it, but like... they're getting along and it's fucking great.
the way he actually tries and help Stede out, in his own way (which is aggressive but very real and upfront, and it clearly shapes Stede), he helps him with the crew and the curse, gives him that little 👌 when he manages to scare the guy with the wanting shot, he stands behind him with the rest of the crew, showing his support of the new captain.
I think he genuinely gives a shit, if even a little one for Stede, and a massive one (though he'll never admit it unless his hand is forced, which I see coming in the near future) for the crew, and isn't just acting like a good dog/right hand. like I think he's genuinely healing, in the best way? absolutely not, but, it's definitely something and I love that for him.
also, him and Lucius getting along, in there own fucked up way, and Izzy giving him the shark and the advice, it's great. (loving the nickname twatty, it's killing me)
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xlysaaa · 1 year ago
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i've always wondered..
if these two mf helped instead of driving away, could there still have been hope? or or or
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anixknowsnothin · 11 months ago
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happy birthday to the music industry (aka taylor)!
Thank you for being the one thing that keeps my sanity intact! I've always loved your music since I was five, and when I joined the Swiftie community; it felt like a second family.
Your songs have carried me through various difficult times in my life, as well as some of the happiest moments! You write some of the most relatable songs—ones I can scream out loud with all my heart. All these songs serve as a reminder that I'm not alone and that you and thousands of others have gone through a similar experience.
There's so much to admire about you! You're smart, funny, talented, and incredibly creative (not to mention gorgeous). The music videos you've directed, your performances, the speeches you've given, and the rights you've fought for—all continue to inspire me. You truly are one of the most generous and extraordinary people in this world. If I could embody even a tiny fraction of your qualities, I'd consider myself lucky.
You may not know me personally, but I owe you so much—from the songs you've written to the people I've met because of you <3 (like my moots).
Thank you, Taylor, for everything! Have an amazing 34th birthday!
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dandyshucks · 9 months ago
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i get slightly annoyed when people make community posts that tell ppl to stop doing xyz and use the phrases "they're a FICTIONAL character, theyre NOT REAL" to justify whatever theyre saying because:
1) everyone knows that already, we're all aware these are blorbos from our media;
2) if someone is genuinely struggling to grasp that because of a delusion or similar, a forceful reality check is only going to cause harm rather than help;
3) it just feels so needlessly patronizing;
4) most of the time whatever I see people complaining about is either smth that I never see anyone doing or if it is smth somebody is doing then the block button is a very quick and effective fix for the issue (or even a quick convo w the person in DMs can resolve issues!)
(granted I keep my following circle very small and probably miss a lot but if i can do that then perhaps... perhaps other people can do it too fhfkdl like just prune back whatever u dont like seeing! unfollow or block as needed!)
#speaking as someone who has experienced and occasionally still experiences delusions!!!#reality checks do not help unless we ask for them directly! it's only going to make things worse if u force one on us!#also yes im aware of the hypocrisy of me making a post complaining abt things#but its often just this one phrase that i will see in otherwise decent posts that go around#and im not about to unfollow ppl just bc of this one phrase being used in a post or two that they might've rbed fhfjdl#also this is a niche thing to know about i think? like i dont think most ppl know a lot about delusions#.... as evidenced by ppl using delulu as a quirky meme word. god that one makes me tired and frustrated fjfkdl#but yeah normally i keep complaints and annoyances to myself but this one i figured might actually be helpful to talk about here#since i know theres probably a lot of ppl who have no idea that this is a thing that can actually make things worse rather than better#and like. theres bigger fish to fry i know that! this is a relatively small thing all things considered#but i feel like perhaps if i can make life a little easier for one other person who struggles w mental health then its worth it#if i can convince one person to be more mindful of their language to make the world slightly safer for fellow mentally ill folks then yay!#and i know the internet doesnt need to cater to us crazies but fhdkdl it'd be cool if ppl could just be a tad kinder or more thoughtful#again! not shaming or blaming and I'm not even upset w anyone#ppl genuinely just do not know abt this stuff unless a loved one or they themselves struggle w delusions or psychosis etc#and even then oftentimes its such a stigmatized topic that even ppl who struggle w it themselves might not know or realize it#anyways. climbing down off my soapbox like a kitten clumsily climbing off of a tall couch SBDJSKL#dandy.cmd
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why does the Tsuko G. version of Deja Vu sound like Luca Kaneshiro omg
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yaseraphinee · 16 days ago
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pick a card - who is crushing on you ?
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This is a reading I did back in April of this year. I made it with the energy of the Taurus new moon. Hope it resonates <3
PILE SELECTION :
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Pile 1 Pile 2 Pile 3
/!\ DISCLAIMER /!\ (for all the delulus - here's your anti-delulu pill)
A tarot reading is supposed to give guidance based on your current energies, it is NEVER a replacement for therapy. It shouldn't dictate your life choices but more so guide you while making the choices. At the end of the day, you are the master of your soul and destiny. Remember that you have all the power and the free will to take the actions you want. Use discernment . Also remember : energies shift, a reading might resonate with you today but not tomorrow.
PILE 1
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song - Ah W Noss by Nancy Ajram
Possible astrological placements :
Heavy Aquarius energy, heavy air and earth energy, Sun moon or mercury in aquarius (especially moon); Sun in Taurus, Venus in Aries, Mars in Aquarius / Aries, Capricorn rising ; Taurus, Aquarius and Aries personal planets; Chiron in the 4th house / the 10th house
Physical appearance : slightly under 6 ft , dark eye color, probably has eyebags or , looks mad 24/7, straight dark brown hair or jet black hair ; appears judgmental asf. might be skinny but still kind of muscular, has a visible scar on their face around their eyebrows or eyes or lips,
They dress casually , I see a lot of sportswear, neutral color, black, gray, white and maybe beige or marine blue
Tarot cards : 9 of swords, 10 of Pentacles, The Magician, The Tower, King of Pentacles, 3 of swords, Page of Pentacles, Ace of swords
MBTI : INTJ, INFJ, ISTJ
Who is this person ?
HUGE overthinker, career oriented, hard worker, well known in their field but prefer to work in the shadows, top grader, highly critical of themself and of other people, plans everything, a mastermind, ambitious, sharp mind, introvert, lowkey anti-social, overtly sensitive, might be in college, pursuing a master's degree; might be their last year as an undergrad, anxiety disorder, really anxious and sensitive to the outside world, a loner, might just hangout with 3 people max and they're always seeing together in the hallways or in the school's library, intimidating exterior, people are scared to approach them because they think they will disturb their peace lmao, deep voice, barely speaks, fierceful look, don't talk much, undercover hopeless romantic, might watch a lot of rom-com or romance K-dramas, might read slice of life romance oriented manhwas , watches anime, probably went on several friends trips to tokyo, kyoto, and bangkok with his friends.
Probably has a lot of family problems, is the "man of the family", has a part time job either as a waiter or something related to their field of study.
During lectures, either sits in the front or at the far back (to be in peace lol) and is really concentrated on the class, isn’t scared to asked questions even when there are a hundred students in the amphitheater looking at them
Might be a bit conservative or just religious, possibly muslim
might be a minimalist, a digital minimalist (James Scholz vibes)
Ethnicities/ Race : korean, pakistani, chinese, vietnamese, indian, afghan,arabic, north african,...
The effect you have on them ? 
This crush shocked them to their core. As they were on their way to become the King of Pentacles, you came and made all their plans crumble.
I feel like love is their blind spot and whenever they develop some type of feelings for people everything around them breaks down. They might have Venus in the 6th house or Venus in the 8th house, or Pluto might be aspecting their venus on their natal chart. I feel like they might have had a traumatic love experience when they were in middle school/ freshman year of highschool that left them deeply hurt and created deep emotional wounds. They’re still traumatized from this experience and them having a crush on you is sadly reopening their wounds and it’s obviously so triggering. Despite the fact that this crush is hurting them, they know it’s also healing them in a way ? Like their heart is not completely dead and in shambles and will not be forever. I am hearing "Your heart is broken , not permanently shattered.”
How do you appear to them ? How do they see you ? 
You appear peaceful to them. You might be an INFJ, ENFJ , INTP, ISFP or ISFJ.
You might have Virgo, Pisces or Libra placements (sun, moon, mercury, venus, rising,..). You could have 3rd/9th house placements, Moon in the 3rd or 4th house. You could be a scorpio or capricorn rising. You probably have 1st house, 6th house and 8th house synastry with them. (even 12th house for some)
You might have at some point awkwardly smiled at them in the school halls or library and it left a mark on them. They probably think about it often. Whenever they think about you, they can feel themselves calming down, slowing down. They’re probably really busy and therefore always stressed out but when you cross their mind, they can feel the stress disappearing for a short period of time.
They see you as a more relaxed version of themselves. They see you as being someone who is content with being alone. You could be a popular loner like you’re really well liked but you still enjoy doing your own thing. You probably are similar to them and they see that. They see the mirroring of you both. You have a really similar energy as this person and they sense it. But you’re much more confident, or content and laid-back/ chill than them and I think they kind of envy you for that.
You’re represented by the 9 of pentacles while they’re represented by the 10 of pentacles on their way to become a King of pentacles. Despite the fact that you’re “behind” them in the race of life, you don’t seem to be freaking out about it. Instead, they see you taking it easy. You’re taking your time because you have this deep trust in the Universe that everything happens in time and for a reason. They don’t understand how you’re able to just go with the flow while also  having somewhat of a plan and a pretty clear direction on where your life is headed.
PILE 2 (slight 18+ stuff)
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song - GOOD LOYAL THOTS by Odetari / EYES ON ME by Asteria
Possible astrological placements : 
Cancer rising for men, Virgo risings for woman/non-binary, Venus in Libra, Venus in Aquarius, Mercury in Libra, Moon in Pisces/Scorpio/Cancer, Moon in Virgo, 5th house placements, 7th house placements, the asteroid lilith (1181) could be prominent/ significant in their chart. 10th/4th house placements. Libra, Sagittarius and Cancer placements. Could be born in late November.
Physical appearance : if it’s a man : looks like those bad boys in these dark romance novels, 2019 e-boy/girl/enby vibes, angelic eyes, looks kind of innocent in a way, similar eyes to troye sivan (not necessarily the colour but just the energy they give). No matter their gender, they just look really androgenous, really nice and warm smile, rodrick heffley vibes, carrington vibes (the content creator)
Ethnicity/ race : If this person identifies themselves as male then they might be half white half latino (esp mexican) or fully white (i am getting english, american or even german some italian blood even). If not, then they could be any ethnicities honestly but I am heavily picking up on White (Eastern Europe), American. They could look really racially ambigous. Could be half asian (filipino or thai/ viet heavy) and white (icelandic, german, eastern europe in general)
Tarot cards : 4 of swords, 2 of Wands, Queen of Cups, 2 of Cups, The Emperor, 7 of pentacles, 10 of swords,  Ace of Wands
MBTI : this one is hard to pick up one exactly the energy is a bit too “mutable” in a way but I’d say surely an IXXP or EXXJ type. Picking up especially on INTP, ISTP, ENFJ or ENTJ
Who is this person ? 
Could be any ethnicities honestly, any gender, probably non-binary, trans, or just do not label themselves
Activist for LGBTQ+ rights, if they’re a man probably bisexual, feminist, anti-specist, probably anarchist > for sure politically inclined and left winged, even far left or marxist for some 
Might enjoy philosophy, history, metaphysics, poetry, travelling 
In their 20s, probably really young / I am getting 17/18/19 years old, if they go to college they probably are really popular on campus.
Might play the guitar, the drums, listen to indie music, indie rock, hyper pop, Artsy, paint their nails black, nails often painted with chipped nail polish, probably enjoys painting, cinema
They LOOOVE getting attention, compliments, being the center of attention. They are probably really charismatic and a lot of people tend to crush on them and they cling to them/ get addicted to their energy/aura. They’re really magnetic, a true charmer, a smooth operator, a smooth talker. I’ll be fully honest though , they are probably in their fuckboy/girl/enby era. Probably sleeps around, goes to parties every week. They’re probably always surrounded by women or generally speaking feminine energies LOOOVE them like they get addicted to them (especially true if they’re a man). Probably a womanizer too.
People might assume that they’re reckless and only there for a good time, not a long time. They are kind of the talk of the town. People see them as smart, artistic. People consistantly gossip about them and their every move, might also make terrible and false assumptions on them. Despite their f*ckboy/girl/enby traits they are deep down really sweet and sensitive. They honeslty hope to find their true love one day, they just have some kind of attachment issues that makes it hard for them to trust and settle. For now, I don’t think they're ready to delve into them (the attachment issues) yet. (it’s giving mother wounds and daddy issues lol)
Always attached to messy situationships/ friends with benefits situations, messy breakups, crazy exes, revenge,...
They're really nonchalant, cool dude vibes “you know i am a cool guy you can trust me”; probably thinks they understand women and the “female nature” (HELP-) “I understand women, I understand emotions,..” vibes
Generally don’t really walk the talk lmaoo (they’re kind of a p*ssy that pretends to be tough, too cool for school lol), light skin energy HEAVY, actually really funny and empathetic, really sweet too
The effect you have on them ? 
I’ll say it, they’re probably too prideful to come to you lol They’re used to people approaching them first. That's how almost all of their relationships started. They probably are like : I am attracted to pile 2 and I have the situation in control. They will probably come up to me like everyone else does anyways so it’s fine, no need to make the first move (the sagittarian ego lord -). They probably like you because they think  you’re naive, innocent and their paternalistic/ manspreading tendencies might tickle a bit for that reason. They assume you’re some kind of pure angel, and that you don’t know much about the world. They see you as a Page of Cups or Queen of Cups when really you are a High Priestess. You just pretend to be clueless/ or not as perceptive to protect your peace. They want to protect you and take you to outside world. Take you to art exhibitions, while they manspread their knowledge about a specific art movement and they imagine you being impressed by how perceptive and educated they are. (they don't have to be a man to manspread just to clarify lol). To be honest, they have a deep desire for recognition and it shows in what they imagine doing with you.
Honestly, they underestimate you quite a bit. You’re so much smarter than you appear to be .
I have a hard time knowing what kind of effect you have on them since they seem so self focused. You just feed their desire to provide and protect. This desire might come from some kind of daddy issues or complicated relationship with their masculinity/masculine side.
How do you appear to them ? How do they see you ? +18 stuff here
As I said above, they see you as a "princess" to be saved, an angel. They probably think you’re too pure for this world, that you’re "vanilla", innocent. They really like your body. They probably scrutinize it a lot looking at every curve. They love your chest area and your thighs/butt. Honestly, it’s getting really sexual lol They probably have a lot of dirty thoughts about you, dominating you but not in a mean way, really soft dom vibes. They would love to see you in pink/white lacy lingerie / really sweet lolita vibes (the japanese style). I won’t elaborate further on the 18+ description but just know they're really imaginative lol They also see you as really sweet and caring . They think you’re really selfless and empathetic. In their eyes, you seem to be really emotionally intelligent. If you’re hyper feminine or petite THEY LOVE IT.
PILE 3
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song - Feelin' Myself by will.i.am ft. Miley Cyrus, Wiz Khalifa, French Montana, DJ Mustard / French Montana's verse especially
/!\ While tapping with the energy, your resistance to this person was HEAVY. You probably know exactly who this person is and you probably are annoyed that they seem to follow you everywhere, even in a random tarot reading on Tumblr lmaoo I am so sorry for you. This reading could trigger you, annoy you or make your eyes roll, just to warn you.
Possible astrological placements : Libra rising, Leo rising, Sun, Moon, Venus and/or Mars in Leo, probably have many placements between the first and the 5th house, heavy on the 1st house, 3rd house and 2nd house, Gemini Sun or Venus, Mercury, cancer placements
Physical appearance : probably dresses like a 2013/2014 rapper (lmaoo sorryy guys), ages - 25 / but strong late 30s early 40s, millennial loser vibes (help-), ear piercing, eyebrow arch piercing, likes to wear Grillz, they’re probably not very tall like around 1m69 to 1m76 or something (5,5 ft, 5.7 ft). They could be skinny or just slim.
Ethnicity/ race : I know the moodboard only showcases black men, but I am picking up they could just as well be asian or White, arabic,...
Tarot cards : 3 of cups, The Emperor, 7 of Pentacles, The Sun, 4 of Pentacles,
MBTI : ESFP, ESFJ, ENFP, ENTP, 
Who is this person ? 
Their name could start with a P, Patrick, Peter, could have a similar vibe to Peter Kavinsky from To All The Boys I’ve Loved Before for some.
For a minority of you, they are still a student in college probably majoring in Business or economy. Probably skips many lectures, classes.
For most of you though, they are a real grown adult, who has taxes to pay and works either part time or full time at the same job as you.
You could work at a store like a 7/11 or just stores that you find in gas stations, or something like that.
You might meet them, see them at work and you probably find them annoying as hell. You think they’re childish and that they should grow tf up. They’re probably older than you which makes their immature behavior even more embarrassing. You probably see them as a scrub or a manchild (ain’t shit by doja at is coming up they really get on your nerves lmaoo). They probably hit on you the first day at your job and they never really stopped 
Always comes at work late, prefers to have fun, doesn’t like having too many responsibilities, doesn’t like rigidity, always cracking a joke, the clown of the class vibes, super extraverted, loud, really good on the dancefloor, might go to the club every week, doesn’t have much going on in their life, does the bare minimum at work, unstable financially, doesn’t have any career ambition, culture vultures, they remind me of the Miley Cyrus and Justin Bieber lightskin era, they love alcohol, hennessy, malibu,..
Really popular in your local community, probably has at least 500 followers on insta but I am picking it’s more than that like 1500 and plus, super active on social media, probably has snapchat, posts stories almost on a daily basis, they are known at work to crack jokes, loves 90s/old school rap, gangsta rap, 90’s RnB, jodeci, Boys II Men,  probably a sneakerhead,  that’s random but they might be attracted to milfs or women with character lmaoo, a millennial that hangs out with gen zers (help-), eternal teenage boy type of energy, childlike spirit, nice, really likeable, social butterfly, you just can’t hate them, might be the type of person to sing out loud randomly.
The effect you have on them ? 
They like you. They like the fact that you are hard to get. They love the chase. I think they’re attracted to the duality of your respective personalities. It’s probably an opposites attract type of situation in their head. They like your black cat energy. The effect you have on them is that you just entertain them in a way. They like the chase, the adrenaline that comes with it and since you’re guarded they see it as a good challenge. 
How do you appear to them ? How do they see you ? 
You might be an ISTJ, or INTJ. You might have Capricorn, Aquarius, Virgo or Taurus placements. You might be a Taurus rising. I am picking up too that you hate loud people and attention seekers. You probably don’t like dependent and clingy people too. You probably have a really cutthroat and no bullshit energy that they love (and lowkey find amusing they like to annoy you but in a flirty way that’s just the way they flirt I think). They think you’re too serious for your own good. You’re probably working part time while you’re still in college and they think you’re putting too much pressure on yourself. They think you should slow down and just enjoy the moment, live in the moment and let loose. They think you smell good, always look clean and put together. They see you as high maintenance. You’re probably like the high maintenance era of Saweetie. Icy Grl vibes (go to check the music video of this song this might be your exact vibes). They see you as a diva but not in a derogatory sense, they  actually like it. It’s giving Mariah Carey and Eminem's dynamic lol (enemies to lovers orr 👀 (i know you just gave me the biggest bombastic side eye lmaoo sorry)). “Boy why are you so obsessed with me?” but you’re like really mad and fed up lmaoo
Literally you : you're giving goddess energy ✨ go get your bag sis as you should the dusties don't even deserve to breath the same air as you period.💅
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remember guys : stay blessed <3 (and happy spooky season hehe best season of the year anyone who disagrees you can argue with the wall)
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duchi-nesten · 1 year ago
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smh imagine being so delulu. ANYWAY I am very excited to bring you the Shared Cujostody Comic that includes plot (no way!)
Better strap in, this is gonna be a slightly longer one WOOO! In the meantime you might wanna check out the other Cujostody posts cuz there's gonna be a Lot(tm) of references!
Shared Cujostody AU Masterpost
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cheesiedomino · 9 months ago
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Second Chances ꙳ ੭ * ‧
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synopsis: your old situationship from many years ago just moved back in town and of course, he has to text you. but it’s not just any normal text — he’s asking you out on a proper date this time. will you give a second chance to Cupid? or will you be left here feeling stupid?
genre: lee minho x fem!reader | exes (??) to lovers wc: 4.6k tags/warnings: fluff, some light angst, slightly suggestive but nothing srs, mild cursing, kissing, small mentions of crying T-T
now playing 🎧: from the start by laufey
[this is part of my valentine’s series where i write a short story for each member surrounding themes of love, newfound romance, relationship hardships & more.]
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“Why don’t you give Tinder a try already? I’m sick of hearing you nagging all day about being lonely!” Areum abruptly suggests mid-convo , resting her palm on the side of her face.
As you both casually wait for the food to arrive, you end up on the dreadful topic of dating again. You got into a real heated discussion with her, sitting in a booth at this new restaurant one of your coworker’s recommended. It wasn’t super well known but they wouldn’t stop raving about how delicious their breadsticks were. The place wasn’t too jam packed but definitely had a decent amount of people. What you weren’t anticipating on was seeing dozens of couples here, it kind of threw your whole vibe off since it only reminded you of your current sad relationship status. Maybe you were putting far too much thought into it but everything seemed so highly unfair. Glaring in envy while they all happily rub in your face that they’ve found their forever companion.
Life really can be cruel at times.
“You can’t be for real right now..” you instantly side eye your friend from across the table. Feeling personally triggered whenever she mentions online dating. You refuse to try it, never wanting to partake in such a vain concept where you swipe left and right based solely on looks. “That’s not the same as real romance. I want to meet someone naturally, wanna tell my kids when they grow up how I met their dreamy, hunk of a father in aisle 39 at Whole Foods.”
One could say it’s almost pathetic in a way— this burning desire you harbor within, longing for a pure, quaint, and beautiful love. Constantly catching yourself daydreaming about finding your life partner, the person you’re going to marry and possibly create an eternal family with. That day has yet to come unfortunately, but you still hold onto the thought of you someday meeting the one.
You thought you found them before, but thou shalt not speak thy names out into existence.
“Well, good luck finding ‘real romance’ in the big age of 2024-” Areum snorts in amusement, taking a pause to sip on her mango strawberry lemonade. “I need whatever drugs you’re on that’s making you this delulu so I can fantasize about my knight and shining armor that’s never coming!”
God you hate that word. Delulu. Why are you suddenly “delusional” for wanting a picture perfect romance? It doesn’t need to be perfect per se, but you want to feel adored, swept off your feet and embraced like the true queen you are. Was that too much to ask? Considering the current state of dating in this day and age, it might just be.
“I mean, let’s face it girl. You literally don’t know the first thing about love ___, it’s not all sunshine and rainbows like in the K-dramas y’know! Haven’t you only had like one boyfriend in high school? You barely even dated that guy for a month-”
“That’s because he dumped me to go move to LA and become a dumb YouTuber!” You snapped back, cutting her off to get all the facts straight.
It was hard not to grimace while thinking of such old memories. Dating a Minecraft streamer definitely had to be one of the most embarrassingly cringe choices you’ve ever made.
“Whatever that’s beside the point. What I’m trying to get at here is you don’t have the best track record when it comes to men. Remember that other guy you were seeing before we graduated? I thought y’all would’ve dated for sure but he turned out to be a dickhole just like the rest of ‘em…” Areum shakes her head in disbelief, recalling all those times you’d call in a frenzied panic about things not working out.
“What was his name again? Min… Minwoo? No, that’s not it.. it was definitely Min something.” She attempts on remembering but keeps drawing a blank.
“Minho.” You answer almost instantaneously. His name still rolled off the tongue smooth as velvet.
It felt weird though. Saying it out loud after so many years of blocking it from your immediate vocabulary. A name you thought would never escape your lips again.
“Damn, you really still think about him don’t you?” She dares to ask, knowing how difficult it is for you to even talk about this anymore.
You only respond by nodding slowly, unable to bring yourself to look at her. It was far too intense; bearing the emotions of hurt and guilt from a past fling that meant more to you but nothing to the other. That’s how most of your tragic stories end— always too overly into them while they barely reciprocate any of that energy towards you. The thing is, you thought Minho actually liked you, even so far as wanting to date in the near future. Considering he brought you over his parent’s house (to hook up of course), and though you didn’t meet them you still think that meant something. Most men don’t just bring any woman they’re seeing to their parent’s place without somewhat thinking a potential relationship could happen down the line.
“So that’s why you should download Tinder and start swipin’ on some other cuties! It’ll at least distract you for a bit and get your mind off that asswipe,” Areum pitches her idea once more, “there’s plenty other fish in the sea ___. Not everyone online is some crazy serial killer, plus you clearly don’t seem to be having much luck out in the real world.”
You wanted to jump up from the table and erase that smirk from her face but instead you roll your eyes at that last remark. “I don’t need those shitty dating apps. I’m very capable of finding someone in real life for your information!” You quickly retort as a means to defend yourself. Even though she did have a point, her delivery could’ve been a little bit nicer.
It’s not easy being a hopeless romantic, you can’t help but yearn for that special someone to enter your life and change it for the better. You won’t feel wholly satisfied nor complete until you do. The sad reality of the matter was that you are still painfully single. No one’s interesting enough to cease your attention, let alone go on any actual dates. Areum’s had enough of your bitching and whining though, there’s only so many rants and tirades she can keep listening to about your vicious hatred for men before she loses it completely. Your nonexistent love life has become more of a nuisance as that time of year approaches— Valentine’s Day. A god forsaken holiday you’ve always loathed with a passion. Wanting nothing more than to be one of those girls on the receiving end getting flowers and chocolates. A day full of the utmost joy and pleasant surprises from your loving significant other.
Must be nice..
Speaking of surprises.. The buzzing in your ear echoes from your phone pinging loudly, indefinitely startling you. Grabbing it to check the sudden notification, your eyes go absurdly wide at the contact name displayed on your screen. Blinking numerous times from shock, you stare at your phone in incredulity; making sure your eyes weren’t playing tricks on you.
Lee Minho. The Lee Minho?
What kind of sorcery is being conjured where the instant you bring him up, he somehow texts you after all these years of not speaking? This coincidence was more than unsettling to you. A part of your inner thoughts still believes this is all some elaborate joke being played on you, waiting for a cameraman to pop out of some curtain to announce you’ve just been pranked. But nothing happens, life proceeds as normal. Now you’re left with the most puzzling notification you might’ve ever received.
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It was your last year of college and the pressure of your academics along with appeasing your family was getting to you immensely. You needed an escape from all of it, desperately. Which you found through none other than Lee Minho, the boy who worked as a barista at Cozmo’s; this coffee shop you used to frequent a lot. It was a cute, small family-owned establishment and they made the best matcha lattes— in your humble opinion. You’d pick one up almost every day along with a slice of freshly baked cinnamon bread. It started off as only playful banter with him in the beginning, then it lead to more as time went on. One day, as you reached out to pay he blocked your hand from moving any closer, letting you freely walk away without spending a dime. This soon became a regular occurrence, as you’d start seeing Minho outside of work, getting to know more and more about him. You remember so desperately wanting to date back then, pitying your past self for thinking there was even a chance.
‘Maybe he’s just texted the wrong person’ you psyche yourself into thinking, but when you unlock your phone to finally read the message — an uncomfortable lump forms in the pit of your throat.
Minho 🐈:
Hey is this still ___’s number?
You honestly don’t know why you still have his number saved, let alone allowing a whole emoji to be next to it. Though it never was like you to delete anything, no matter how painful it may have been. More lingering questions makes you want to seek out the possible solutions. Why would he text you of all people ? None of this adds up in your mind realistically. Furrowing your brows in concentration, you think of what to say as you draft out a response.
Yes… who’s this?
After a tedious struggle of typing out multiple paragraphs and immediately deleting them, you went over your words a few more times before sending a final reply. It would’ve been strange had you knew exactly who he was off the bat, that’ll just be dead giveaway you still had his contact info saved this whole time. But with that logic, doesn’t that make Minho just as odd for still keeping your number after all this time has passed?
Your phone dings again.
Minho 🐈:
Srsly -_-
Did you really delete my number??
Bet he didn’t see that one coming. He probably thought the moment he texts you, you were gonna kiss up to him like you’ve always done in the past. Mentally giggling to yourself at the image of him getting flustered by you not knowing who he was at first. Feels good to know you knocked his confidence down a peg.
Lol, chillax.. I know it’s you Minho :P
Not even a minute later, a flood of incoming messages appear. Biting your lip out of nervousness, your heart couldn’t stop beating so fast— anxiously checking your phone as the atmosphere around you suddenly gets stuffier.
Minho 🐈:
Better be lucky I didn’t block you after that ㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋ
Guess who’s back in the city btw. Did ya miss me? ;)
No need to answer that, I already know you did. You should stop by at Cozmo’s again sometime!
Also what’re you up to this week? I need you to clear out all your plans because I’m taking you out on a date.
You always knew Minho was the bold type but this was on another level. The sheer audacity he has to even ask something like this after not reaching out for almost 3 years was more than ballsy on his part. It felt like a surge of butterflies erupting in your stomach, getting lightheaded as you think about seeing him again. He really had an effect on you like no other.
Glancing up from your screen to finally pay attention to Areum again, you assure her everything’s going to be just fine. “Looks like I won’t be needing to download Tinder after all.”
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Later on that day you ended up going to Cozmo’s and meeting up with Minho. It never really took much convincing from him to get you to budge, though it was a hell of a lot worse back then. You used to blindly follow along with anything he said just to seek his approval, hoping that eventually he’ll see you as the girl he wants to settle down with. Alas, nothing ever blossomed into something more, and you knew deep down that this was headed nowhere— but that still didn’t stop you from fantasizing about a future with him. Getting lost into deep thought, head heavy in the clouds as you imagine the idea of Minho confessing his undying love for you. You’ll be so caught off guard as he gets down on one knee, looking at you with the entire solar system in eyes while he proposes in the most charming way. It really is pitiful how much you still daydream about a guy who wasn’t your boyfriend but would constantly act like he was, then up and leaves without mentioning a single word about it.
You convinced yourself he ran off with someone else to have a better life with, even hearing through town gossip that he’s moved to South Korea to pursue becoming an idol. Whatever the case may be it still weighed heavily on your mind that he never bothered to tell you anything, even a simple ‘goodbye’ would’ve sufficed the empty hole in your heart. The main reason you agreed on meeting up with Minho was to finally ask, why? Why did he pretend to like you? Why did he act like your boyfriend when he never had intentions on seriously dating? Why was he so good at making you fall so hard for him..?
“You look great.” You subconsciously blurt out, affixed in a daze as you stare in awe at the man in front of you.
It’s been a while since you came here— never able to fully bring yourself to try and go back. Though you knew this place first, and they really did have the best Mactha lattes in the universe. It reminded you too much of him and you sadly had to let it go.
You weren’t proud of it but you did go home quickly to change clothes and redo your makeup. Usually you wouldn’t care but this was the only guy you’ve been consistently crushing on for years, you had to feel good inside and out. Minho was just as gorgeous as you remembered, if not he looked even more ethereal — which seemed impossible in itself already. He’s grown up so beautifully, his facial features became more sharp, especially his jawline which looks so defined and sculpted by the Gods.
Minho lightly chuckles at your timidness, some things just never change. “You look way better.” His lips drew into a faint smirk as he admires your presence.
He meant every word of what he said, you looked really good, and it was making him even more frustrated that so much time has passed. Regretting the way he handled things so many years ago, wishing he could take it all back and do everything differently. Seeing you again made it easier for Minho to suppress the guilt he’s borne for so long. This moment feels like a second chance to make amends for his past mistakes.
You couldn’t help but blush when you hear his compliment, feeling your ears grow hot as you look at the ground. There was a silent pause between you that lasted for what seemed like ages. Weirdly enough the conversation flowed well after he finally broke the awkwardness, the chemistry was overall still there and were able to pick up right where it left off.
“I’m so glad you came ___, I’ve been dying to see you since I got here. I’m surprised you even still responded to my lame ass.”
Minho’s light confession puzzles you. If he really was dying to see you, why’d he wait so long to get in contact with you? To be fair, you don’t know the exact time he came back.
“Oh, is that so? When’d you come back? Also show me pics of Korea, I’ve always wanted to know what it’s like there.” You fondly inquire, leaning against the side of the wall as he’s still behind the counter. He mentioned to you he’s only working part time because his parents would rather mooch off their son for free labor than to hire and pay a new employee.
“Yesterday,” he quickly states before taking out his phone to scroll through his gallery, “guess my sister must’ve told you I went there huh?”
You shook your head, “Nah, I haven’t talked to Elle in a while. She’s tried hitting me up a few times though.. but I found out through Areum ‘cause she was seeing Hoseok back then.”
They were definitely “seeing” each other alright, but mostly in the bedroom. Areum didn’t want anything exclusive with Hoseok and neither did he, it was the perfect friends with benefits situation. Minho and Hoseok were good friends who’ve known each other for a while, so naturally he’d tell Areum everything and overshare at some point.
“Agh, there’s a customer gotta take this. One sec, sorry!” He briefly apologizes before bringing his attention to the new person heading inside. You nod, signaling he’s good to go. “I’ll be waiting over there,” you point to a small wooden table with 2 chairs in a corner.
Once Minho comes back you notice he’s no longer wearing his purple work apron; back in his regular attire now and sporting an oversized dark grey hoodie that was three times too big. He was holding a large cup with green liquid and a paper bag in his hand, that’s when it clicks for you— he still remembers your favorite meal.
He’s grinning the whole time he’s handing you the matcha latte and cinnamon pastry, smiling from ear to ear like a kid on Christmas Day. This was the most you’ve seen him be so enthusiastic about something, even back when you were “with” him you can’t recall him beaming with such energy like this.
“Awh, thank you. I haven’t had either one of these in years!” You wanted to give him the biggest hug but you refrained from doing so, feeling as though it may be too early for that.
“Of course dear, anything for you.”
Why does everything he says have to make you melt from the inside out? It’s not fair! >:(
Glancing down at your yummy beverage, you see a message written on the side of the glass with bold permanent sharpie. Tilting your head to read it, the words are bit jumbled together but you get the gist. You’re almost left speechless after it reads: ‘___, Will you be my valentine?’
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Your most dreaded and least favorite holiday is here, yippee! But, there’s a twist on this year’s turn of events; you actually have someone to celebrate this wretched tradition with. You should be excited but all you’re feeling is the sudden urge to vomit as you were nervous out of your mind. This was kind of weird to you, going on a date with your ex boyfriend who was never even your real boyfriend. Looking back on it now you shouldn’t have tolerated a relationship dynamic like that, Minho was clearly taking advantage of your passiveness by not explicitly saying what he wanted. On the contrary, you had no one to blame but yourself, you never spoke up or criticized anything even if it didn’t coincide with your personal morals.
The fact he never took you on an actual date until now speaks volumes, you obviously didn’t have enough self worth back to demand better treatment. It took you years of figuring out what a real, healthy relationship is supposed to be like through trials of therapy and that was an emotional rollercoaster in itself. All your uncertainties soon faded away once you became more secure and knew exactly what you wanted for yourself. It took every ounce of patience and acceptance to unlearn all your bad coping mechanisms and other toxic behaviors that were only stunting your inner growth. You’re happy to be in a position now where you’re able to express wholeheartedly what you deserve, it’s the best feeling ever to feel like you’re in control of your own life.
You spent almost 3 hours getting ready and your bedroom now looked like a war zone. The outfit you chose was super girly, a frilly white dress with pink platform heels— Minho’s going to drool in amazement when he sees you. When you sent Areum photos of you before heading out, she responds right way with a series of hearts and other sweet comments— hyping you up to no end like the best friend she is. She’s also able to help pull you out of your doubtful headspace, when you felt unsure if you could really go through with this she quickly psyched you out of it. Reminding you exactly who you are and why you are the prize, not him. ‘He should be the one who’s nervous, not the other way around’ you assure yourself over and over as a mini ego boost.
His jaw dropped when he spotted you walking up to his car, infatuated by how pretty and perfect you looked in every way possible. It angers him so much to know he took all this for granted, he didn’t appreciate all of you the way he should’ve but now he gets another chance to redo everything and right his wrongs. It’s a lot of pressure but he bravely accepts it, he could never mess up another opportunity like this again. The car ride was fairly silent in the beginning, you were vibing in peace as the only thing you could hear was Minho’s soft indie playlist as background music.
You ultimately chose to be the one to speak first, breaking the ice with a simple inquiry about the date. “So where are we going?” Looking out at the scenery from the window, all you is trees and more trees. If it’s something to do with nature you surely don’t want any parts of it, you’ve never been too fond of the wilderness.
“It’s a surprise, I can’t tell you.” He keeps a tight seal on today’s destination without dropping a single hint, forcing you to go completely blind into this. As he goes back to focus on the road, you sigh anxiously after hearing him refuse to disclose anything.
Did he seriously forget what kind of person you are? Anyone who’s close to you at all knows you’ve never been into those types of things. Ever.
“You know I hate surprises Minho,” you remind him, attempting to pry for more information. Even shooting him a doe eyed look along with poking out your bottom lip, but he doesn’t falter.
He simply nods, “I know but you’ll like this one, just have a little bit of faith me.” Flashing an innocent smile at you, he seems to be overly confident in whatever his plan consists of.
After almost half an hour passes the car finally comes to a stop, you scan the area and instantly notice a sense of familiarity among the place. Across from you was an ice cream parlor you thought didn’t exist anymore. But there it is, still standing with dozens of customers waiting in line. The small shop was famously known for its fish-shaped ice cream cones, you’ve always wanted to visit the place and try it when you were a little from seeing it on TV all the time. When you told Minho about it, you said how your parents would say it was too far but it actually closed down and they didn’t know how to tell you. From time to time you’d still think about that place, but you would’ve never thought they relocated. Being here with Minho brings an indescribable amount of happiness to your spirit.
“I mentioned this place like one time in passing, how’d you even remember?” You wonder in amazement, after all these years he still remembers something as minuscule as this.
“It may not have seemed like it but I paid attention to every little detail you told me ___, all it. Of course I know you don’t like surprises but how else would I have been able to take you here?” He sweetly expresses to you, not wanting to hold back anymore.
You wanted to cry right here, right now. All your emotions came crashing down at once and it’s hard to keep them concealed. A lot has changed within these years, things feel so different with him now, especially with how much he’s matured. You notice how he doesn’t act like the typical fuckboy in his early 20’s anymore, he’s much more interested in getting to know only person — that being you.
“I’ve rehearsed this in my head like a million times and I don’t think I’ll ever say it the right way I want but it’s time I start being as transparent as possible with you…” Minho takes a deep breath before continuing, “I’ve always liked you ___, from the start actually,” he keeps going, “I was just scared, of what I don’t know.. Commitment maybe?”
Slightly looking in another direction, your vision faintly blurs from tears welling up, “I- I honestly don’t know what to say..”
“Then don’t say anything at all, I don’t need you to. I may not know the first thing about how to love someone, but I want to learn all of it with you.” He feels all the remorse of leaving you alone for all these years, unable to process the pain you must’ve endured at him not getting into contact with you. “I’m so sorry ___. For everything, I’m going to make it all better I promise.”
Your eyes subconsciously flutter shut when he comes in contact with you. Connecting in perfect symmetry with your lips to sync together in motion. His gentle hands cupped your face delicately; his touch was so warm and inviting. Your fingers were deeply tangled in his brunette locks, relishing every minute as he tilts his head to capture more of you. He genuinely couldn’t believe he went this long without kissing these luscious lips again. His tongue grazed the bottom of your lip to subtly ask for entry and you comply. Dopamine floods both your senses like a series of fireworks going off, feeling intoxicated by each other’s taste. It was probably that vanilla bean chapstick you always wore— an old favorite of his and is still your go-to flavor of choice. He wanted to savor you in this moment for as long as he could, cherish the fact he has you in his hold again.
“Want to know something funny?” He asks out of nowhere, still smirking from that heated kiss that just happened seconds ago.
“Hm?”
“You’re the reason I ended up coming back here.” Minho states bluntly, no hesitation detected in his voice whatsoever.
You struggle to comprehend anything, overwhelmed by all his sudden confessions. “What do you mean?”
“I mean I never want to leave your side ever again ___. I’m staying here with you, I already made the biggest mistake of losing you once I can’t let the same thing happen twice.” He spoke tenderly from the bottom of his heart, it felt so genuine you couldn’t not believe him.
Going back to rewind time isn’t possible, but “do-over’s” are, and sometimes we’re able to get those second chances to make things right when we get them wrong the first time.
[End <3].
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koiiiji · 6 months ago
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threats
summary ; no-one dead au, Gapryong love his kids, him and Baekho thinks their youngster have crush on Jinyong’s daughter, while he being delulu and calls their sons wolves (Jinyong secretly cheering for Jake)
tw ; none, pure fluff and actually happy Kim family
pairing(?) ; kid!jake kim x kid!reader(?)
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The celebration at Gapryong Kim's mansion was in full swing,the occasion was significant - his birthday - the air thick with laughter, clinking glasses, and the warm glow of camaraderie. The adults, slightly tipsy and buoyed by nostalgia, sat around the large dining table and in clusters throughout the spacious living room.
Jake, with his boundless energy and cheerful demeanor, was busy running around the garden, making jokes and laughing. Jerry, more reserved and stoic, watched his friends with a calm smile, while you, being a bit moody yet generally happy, played nearby. Gitae, Gapryon’s oldest son, sat on the steps, brooding and occasionally rolling his eyes at the younger kids' antics. He was in that difficult transitional age where he felt misunderstood and often annoyed by everyone around him.
Inside the mansion, Gapryon and his right-hand men, Jinyong Park, Baekho Kwon, and other members of Gapryong's fist enjoyed the party. Gapryong, a fierce yet caring leader, laughed heartily with his friends, while Jinyong kept an eye on whole buster - trying to mesmorise warm moments with his dearest friends.
Suddenly, the door to the grand room burst open, and you ran in, tears streaming down your face. The room fell silent as you launched yourself into your father’s arms, sobbing.
"Daddy! Daddy!" - you cried, clutching Jinyong’s shirt tightly. - "Jake is threatening my life!"
The adults in the room exchanged confused glances. Jake, the sunny and optimistic boy, threatening someone? It seemed impossible. Moments later, Jake stumbled into the room, his face flushed and red as a tomato. His heart raced with a mix of embarrassment and panic, as he feared what you might say. - "I'm not threatening her life!" he exclaimed, clearly flustered. The room erupted in confusion at the sight of the two young children so passionately arguing. Jinyong petted your hair gently, trying to soothe you.
"What happened, sweetheart?" - he asked softly. You wiped your tears and took a deep breath, ready to present your case. - "Daddy, Jake said he wants to MARRY ME! Can you imagine?!"
Laughter filled the room as Jake, embarrassed and blushing even harder, protested, - "No, I don't!"
"Yes, you do!" - you insisted, sticking your tongue out and pointing at him with your finger. But Jake kept arguing and room filled with child's screams of "Yes" and "No"
"I'm gonna marry only my daddy!"
Gapryong, who loved you as his own child, chuckled and decided to tease you a bit. - "But doesn’t your dad already marry your mother, huh?"
You froze, shock and confusion crossing your face as you turned to look at your father, your eyes welling up with fresh tears. Gripping his shirt tightly, you asked, - "Daddy?... Is that true?" - Jinyong, trying to contain his laughter, nodded. - "You know, baby, your mother still needs a husband, right?"
"Traitor! Daddy is a traitor!" you declared dramatically, eliciting more laughter from the adults. Jake watched you, feeling a pang of resentment and a deeper, unspoken feeling. He had a childish crush on you, and though he didn't fully understand it, he knew he liked you a lot. The idea of marrying you seemed natural to him, even if he was too young to grasp its full meaning. Determined and full of childish resolve, you slid off your father’s lap and marched over to Gapryong. "Then... then..." - you stammered, trying to form your next plan. Gapryong, enjoying the moment, leaned down to your level. - "Then what, little one?" - he asked with a warm smile.
"Then I'll marry... Uncle Gapryong!" - you announced, much to the amusement of everyone present. Gapryong laughed heartily and scooped you up in his arms. - "Well, I'm married as well! And I’m afraid I’m too old for you, sweetheart."
As everyone in the room tried to hold back their laughter, you pouted, realizing your grand declaration might not work out as planned. But the genuine affection and warmth from your family made the moment one to remember. Jake, still blushing, sighed with relief and muttered to his father, - "See? I wasn't threatening her life..."
The room erupted in laughter again, the adults and children alike sharing in the joy and absurdity of the moment, making it a birthday celebration to remember. Just as the laughter began to die down, Gapryong, still smiling, said, - "How about Jake anyway, huh?"
You shook your head vigorously. - "NO!! Uncle Gapryong, don't you understand that Jake spends all his time with Jerry! And they're always hugging!" - You crossed your arms defiantly, misinterpreting their fights as affectionate embraces - "I don't want my husband to hug someone else!" - More laughter filled the room, but you remained serious, big tears still streaming down your cheeks. You jumped off Gapryong's lap, desperately looking for a solution. Your eyes landed on Gitae, who was brooding in the corner of the room. With sudden determination, you ran to him and clung to his neck.
"Then I'm gonna marry brother Gitae!" - you announced with a bright, triumphant smile. It seems that a clear vein of discontent appeared on your father’s forehead and with an innocent smile the glass in his bare hand burst with a crash.
Gitae, caught off guard and visibly annoyed, was about to complain, but you turned to him with the most serious face, as if you were already an adult. - "One wrong word and I will say that I saw how you smoked this morning." - Gitae swallowed hard. It wasn't that he was scared of his mother's reprimands about smoking, but he simply nodded, not wanting to cause more drama. - "Whatever, kid," - he muttered.
Jinyong, not a big fan of Gitae, still with his eyes closed and that innocent smile said, - "I will apply for divorce next morning, hun. Come back to daddy."
bonus :
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The adults had announced their departure a thousand times, each attempt to leave thwarted by another round of drinks, another shared memory, or another joke that sent the room into peals of laughter. Gapryong, at the center of it all, held court with his booming laugh and sharp wit, Jinyong Park matched his pace drink for drink. The room was alive with stories of old scars and forgotten battles, of triumphs and losses, each tale punctuated by hearty toasts and the occasional rowdy song.
In the midst of the adults' revelry, the children, worn out from their own antics, began to succumb to sleep. Jake had run out of steam, Jerry yawned widely before finally giving in, and you, found your eyelids growing heavier by the minute.
As the night deepened, the adults continued to assure one another that they really should be heading home, only to be drawn back into another round of drinks or another hilarious story.
Unbeknownst to the adults, the three of you sneaked out of main room to try to distract yourselves from the impending sleep and fatigue, and decided to play hide and seek. As the hours ticked by, the party showed no signs of waning. But eventually, the night began to wind down, and the adults started to gather their belongings, preparing to leave.
"Alright, everyone, I think it's really time to go now," - Gapryong announced, albeit somewhat reluctantly. His words were met with nods and murmurs of agreement, though none made a move to actually stand up. Jinyong glanced around, suddenly realizing that the children were nowhere in sight. - "Where are the kids?" - he asked, a note of concern creeping into his voice. The adults exchanged worried glances and began to search the mansion, calling out names and checking every room. The once noisy and cheerful group was now a flurry of anxious activity, peering behind furniture, checking under tables, and opening every door they came across.
"Jake? Jerry? Where are you?" - Gapryong called out, his deep voice echoing through the halls.
It was Baekho Kwon who finally stumbled upon the scene. Opening the closet door, he found the three of you nestled among the fallen clothes, fast asleep. He couldn't help but chuckle at the sight before calling out to the others.
"I found them! They're in here!"
The adults rushed over, relief washing over their faces as they took in the adorable sight. You, still peacefully asleep on Jake's hand, throwing your head back and drooling on his arm, while he drooling on your shoulder and his arm protectively around you, Jerry's head rested gently on your lap, his calm, steady breathing a testament to the deep sleep only children could achieve. Gapryong smiled warmly at the sight. - "Well, would you look at that," - he said softly, his voice full of affection. - "Looks like they had their own little adventure."
Jinyong knelt down, carefully scooping you into his arms, not wanting to disturb your sleep. - "Come on, sweetheart," - he whispered, - "let's get you home."
Gapryong and Baekho followed suit, gently lifting Jake and Jerry, who barely stirred, their exhaustion too great to be roused by the movement.
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loool i love annoyed daddy Jinyoung so much!!
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blondwhxrewrites · 6 months ago
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hi! firstly, i love ur writing, it feels like cute little peaks into my delulu rs with mattheo riddle <3 could i request for one where he finds out that he’s the reader’s first bf? ie never kissed, slept tgt etc. (maybe prior to this, reader just kept avoiding the topic or never gave off the impression that they were an evergreen) thank u!
I always forget to add little notes when I'm writing 😫 thank you so much for the kind words!! It means a lot whenever someone comments on my writing it makes me feel all loved 🥰
He stares at you, amusement laced all over his expression. You slapped at his arm, and he chuckled, leaning away from you to escape your attack. "Stop being a smug bastard about this!" You pouted, your cheeks heating up in embarrassment. You knew telling him would be a bad idea. It wasn't like it was your choice to be so inexperienced—you just never had the opportunities most girls your age had.
"I'm not being smug; I'm simply surprised—I mean, how could no one want to snatch up a girl like you?" he replied, a teasing glint to his voice that made you want to wipe the smirk off his face. "How could I get so lucky, princess?"
You rolled your eyes, scoffing at his statement. Sometimes you wonder how he managed to make you fall for him, given how much of a shithead he was sometimes. You swore his ego was the size of the castle—maybe even bigger.
Seeing your clear annoyance, Mattheo grabbed your arm and pulled you into his lap. "I'm just teasing princess. You know I'm honored to be your first—well, everything. I promise I'll take good care of you, okay?" 
You closed your eyes, letting out a groan as your boyfriend pressed a sloppy kiss to your cheek. You pushed his face away from you and buried yourself in his embrace, your face resting in the nape of his neck. He chuckled, and wrapped his arms around you squeezing you slightly. "Ugh, you suck."
"Ohhh—I wouldn't say that princess or else I might need to punish you."
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talaok · 1 year ago
Text
Mornin', Birthday girl
Pairing: No-outbreak!Joel Miller x reader
Summary: it's your birthday, and Joel and your daughters have planned the perfect morning
Warnings: A bunch of overly fluffy smut (cause, as we've established, im delusional): Oral sex (f receiving), unprotected p in v sex, creampie.
a/n: Guess what, it's my b-day!!! And since I'm delulu I wrote myself a little birthday fic as a present (the fact that this is not my real life is such bullshit tbh) and i thought why not post it on here? maybe today's someone else's birthday too and that would be a nice surprise for them, no?
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Sleep was still holding you captive when Joel started positioning himself, making the bed creak with his every movement and cussing internally each time, until finally, he was where he needed to be, right between your thighs.
And what a place to be.
A soft smile pulled at his lips as he watched you peacefully sleeping, your mouth slightly parted, your chest slowly rising and falling... You looked like an angel even when asleep, and his heart filled with that warmth only you knew how to create.
But enough of that, he had to get to work before you woke up.
He gingerly placed his hands on the outer side of your thighs, before slowly, oh so slowly, leaning down to start a trail of small kisses from your navel down to your clit, feeling your body react to his every move.
You still hadn't woken when he glanced up, so for good measure, he flattened his tongue and licked your whole slit like an ice cream cone, and like clockwork, your eyes snapped open.
"b-baby?" your voice was more of a whisper as you finally found the source of your sudden awakening.
"Good mornin', birthday girl" Joel murmured, wasting no time before bending down to taste you again.
"oh my god" you whimpered, having woken from a dream just to get thrown into a new one.
Good morning indeed
"I might just get used to this" A breathy chuckle left your lips, as he licked and sucked your cunt like it was his duty.
"Oh yeah?" the vibrations of his voice made a shiver run up your spine as he answered "I might too" he smirked "I'll just start having you for breakfast"
Your ability to tease and speak quickly disappeared when two of his thick digits plunged into your heat.
"Oh f-fuck" you choked, your hand quickly reaching for his locks to have something to hold onto as he started curling and moving his fingers inside of you, and his mouth closed on your bud to suck on it greedily.
"O-Oh- baby" your back arched from the bed, as he groaned at the feel of your walls tightening around him.
"fuck, you're delicious darlin'"
but you could only hum a low "Oh god" as your legs wrapped around him and your hips started desperately grinding on his face of their own accord.
It didn't take long before your orgasm was approaching, and your legs were shaking.
"C'mon mama" he murmured "Give it to me"
And that's all you needed.
Joel watched hypnotized as you threw your head back, your left hand going to your tits as your right hand gripped his hair for dear life.
He didn't stop, letting you ride out your high until your breathing had become more even, and your fingers in his hair had relaxed.
A soft smile pulled at his lips as he crawled up to meet his lips with yours in a sweet kiss.
"Happy birthday, sugar" he beamed
"thank you, baby" you whispered, one of your hands reaching for his cheek to guide him down for another kiss.
And as the kiss grew hotter, and his hands started roaming every inch of your body, you reached for the bulge in his boxers you could feel rubbing against you.
He groaned into your mouth as you freed his cock and started slowly pumping it.
"fuck" he breathed, leaning down to reserve some attention for your neck "Today's only about you, darlin'" he murmured to your ear, as he took his dick from your hand "let me take care of my wife like she deserves"
You beamed happily at his words, closing your eyes as you felt him position his tip at your entrance until-
"wait" your eyes widened
"what, sugar?"
"is the door locked?"
Joel grinned "Yeah sweetheart"
"oh" you breathed a sigh of relief "ok"
You learned the hard, and very embarrassing way, the importance of a lock to your bedroom door when having two incredibly nosy children.
You tried to get back to your previous excitement when you heard a faint buzz coming from outside your room.
"Is that...music?"
Joel's head fell to your shoulder in frustration as a soft chuckle fled his throat
"It is" he answered, kissing your neck "I told the girls to put on some music"
You frowned "Why?"
A mischievous smirk pulled at his lips as he leaned up to look at you.
"So that you can make all those pretty sounds you love to make"
Your mouth opened to say something, but all you could do was grin like an idiot.
"You're the perfect man, Joel Miller"
"mh" he considered, kissing the corner of your mouth as he got back to positioning his manhood to your entrance "Only 'cause you're the perfect woman, sweetheart"
And with one slow thrust, he was filling you to the brim, and for once, you could cry out like you always wanted to.
"Jesus Christ" he groaned into your neck "always so tight f'me sugar"
"oh my god" you moaned, as he started to move, finding a slow but, oh so fucking deep pace that made your eyes roll to the back of your head.
"I love you so much baby" he breathed, as he hit that spongey spot inside of you with each thrust "I don't know what I did to deserve you, but-" he paused to take a breather as your pussy squeezed him so good it was getting hard to breathe "but christ darlin' I'm thankful for you every day"
"J-Joel" you whimpered as your eyes watered and your hands clawed at his back "I love you too, baby" you promised, "I love you so so much" you murmured, nestling your face in his hair as your breathing got more and more ragged, and the mixture of his lips on your skin and his cock deep inside you started to get too much.
The bed was creaking with every thrust, and the sound of his skin meeting with yours was filling the room, but your hearing had become fainter... like you were still dreaming and the only real thing was Joel's broad body hovering over yours, and your impending orgasm
"o-oh god" you cried,
"let go baby" he murmured, sucking on a spot just beneath your ear as he kept pounding you like he wanted to split you in half "Come for me"
And that was it. Your vision went blank and the world went mute for a minute as a wave of pure pleasure took over your entire body.
Joel kept going, trying to last as much as he could for you, but once you let out yet another breathy moan resembling his name, he couldn't do it anymore, and filled you up completely with his cum.
Silence spread as you both tried to learn how to breathe again, but after a good minute, Joel finally reemerged from the crook of your neck to kiss your lips.
"Let me clean you up" he spoke, pulling out of you and walking into the bathroom "I think breakfast is almost ready"
You nodded mindlessly, too fucked out to realize what he'd just said, until, as he reappeared from the bathroom with a wet cloth in his hand, you finally realized.
"Breakfast?"
__ __ __
"Happy birthday mommy!" Your youngest, Eva, came running towards you as soon as you stepped into the kitchen to hug you as tight as she could.
"Happy birthday Mom!" Sarah smiled, joining the hug just a moment after as Joel stumbled into the room to watch the scene unfold.
You bashed in the warmth of their embrace for a moment, before coming back to earth.
"thank you, babies" you murmured, stroking their backs with your thumb as a gigantic smile spread on your face.
"We made breakfast!" Eva announced as they both leaned away.
"You did?"
"We made birthday pancakes" Sarah explained, pointing at a plate stacked with them.
"Like you do!" Eva chirped
And your words got stuck in your throat as you took everything in.
They did all that. Just for you. Your two beautiful daughters.
"I-" you stuttered, as your eyes started to water.
"You did all that on your own?"
"yup!" 
A tear ran down your cheek faster than you could wipe it away.
"mommy, why are you crying?" Eva asked, concerned "daddy, why's mommy crying? Did we do something wrong?"
"N-no baby, you did nothing wrong" you smiled, as other tears fell from your eyes
"I think mommy's crying 'cause she's happy babygirl" Joel explained, coming in to help.
"Oh" her eyes widened "Are you, mom?"
"yes baby" you reassured her, crouching down to their level to be able to hug them again. "You're the most amazing daughters in the whole world, you know that?" you smiled, soaking in their scent "And I love you more than anything"
"go sit down now" you urged, getting back up as they ran to the table, clearly eager to eat their own creation.
But as they did, your eyes couldn't help but focus on the kitchen.
It was a complete mess.
"I'll clean it up, don't worry" Joel spoke, meeting you by your side, and taking your hand in his.
You smiled for what felt like the millionth time this morning.
"thank you" you beamed "for everything"
"It's the least I could do" he shook his head, leaning in to tenderly kiss you 
And as much as you were enjoying the kiss, you couldn't help but laugh as you heard the comments it was eliciting from the audience.
"Ew," Eva groaned, making a disgusted face.
"gross" Sarah agreed.
You and Joel chuckled as you took a step back for both their sakes.
"c'mon, let's go eat," he said "Breakfast's gettin' cold, mama"
~~~~~~
The fic is done this is just a bunch of other shit cause i feel like it, and id like to take a moment to thank my friends for supporting and feeding my delusions
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The birthday wishes a friend sent me
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And what has now become one of my favorite things I've ever been gifted, the Italian literary classic: Il fu Pedro Pascal
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darkficsyouneveraskedfor · 4 months ago
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Winter's King 27
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No tag lists. Do not send asks or DMs about updates. Review my pinned post for guidelines, masterlist, etc.
Warnings: this fic will include dark content such as noncon/dubcon, cheating, violence, and possible untagged elements. My warnings are not exhaustive, enter at your own risk.
This is a dark!fic and explicit. 18+ only. Your media consumption is your own responsibility. Warnings have been given. DO NOT PROCEED if these matters upset you.
Summary: You are a maid to the Duke of Debray, a lord of the Summer Kingdom. That is, until the king of Winter appears with his particular air of coldness. (Medieval AU)
Characters: Geralt of Rivia
Note: I missed our delulu king.
As per usual, I humbly request your thoughts! Reblogs are always appreciated and welcomed, not only do I see them easier but it lets other people see my work. I will do my best to answer all I can. I’m trying to get better at keeping up so thanks everyone for staying with me.
Your feedback will help in this and future works (and WiPs, I haven’t forgotten those!) Please do not just put ‘more’. I will block you.
I love you all immensely. Take care. 💖
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Vesemir is stoic as he faces the king. The younger of the man cannot be described as the same. A tick in his jaw tugs as his eyes move between the Lord and yourself. Finally, the wander to the other woman in the room, a maid like yourself; Ezme. 
“I am aware you have little time to spare before your departure, so you do best to let me speak plainly,” Lord Vesemir begins, “and so I will.” 
King Geralt hooks his fingers in his belt. His overcoat is undone and his hair messy in its tie. He looks as worn as you’ve ever seen him. You feel much the same. 
“There are whispers in my halls,” Vesemir continues, “they speak of the king and his queen. They stir with scandal and distaste alike. Summer lords are discontent and discontent is a virulent as a winter ague.” 
“You said you would be plain,” Geralt demands. 
“Ah, yes, but I hear less of king and queen than of king and maid, those whispers threaten to become a chatter,” Vesemir tilts his chin defiantly. 
“Don’t,” the king warns. 
“I must. You will not hear any others, even those speaking so venomously behind your very back,” the elder lord jabs his finger in the air, “you would risk your victory for what--” 
“You have no place to reprimand me on this,” Geralt walks forward, planting his hands on the table as he glares across at the other man. You can only assume by his stance the dark expression on his chiseled features. “You sit here with your mistress and would scold me for the same--” 
“I am no king. I am a forgotten soldier in his hold. No one might notice me. No, my liege, my lord, my king, I do not scold you, I warn you and I offer my assistance, not my defection,” the broad castle lord squares his shoulders as Ezme sidles towards you. You share with the maid an uncertain glance. “Let her stay. Go and settle your kingdom, balance your crown, sit the throne so all can see your right. When all is even, return, then yo might claim your pleasure but you need to attend your duty first.” 
The king is silent. He takes a deep, gritty breath and drags his palms across the wood, standing slowly. He exhales in a winter draught. He dips his head slightly as you wallow in the frigid lull. 
“I have put down a summer king, I have marched the lands from hinter to sunlight, I have overcome more than your fears, old man,” Geralt snarls, “I do not care for gossip on the tongues of foolish ladies and their thin-skinned husbands” 
“Yet, you should,” Vesemir insists. 
“Who are you to tell me what I should do? Lord Vesemir, you have served me well and loyal, I do not doubt you, but in this you have no place,” the king grits. “My wife has an heir in her womb, I have my victory, I have done my duty. I have bled, I have wept, I have given my very being for these people. Why should I be deprived of one sliver of selfishness?” 
“It is treacherous--” 
“My father had three mistresses at once. That was treacherous. He was clumsy and careless. I am not the same--” 
“She wears your cloak. You would flaunt it in the faces of all. How is that not careless?” 
“Your integrity stands by the hearth, watching us, and she will lay in your bed,” Geralt accuses, “why should I care what judgement you put upon me?” 
“I am a lonely old man, not a king with a new bride--” 
“Enough!” Geralt roars and grabs the table. He jerks it to the side, throwing it to the wall so it bounces and rolls onto its side, a split renting down the wood. “Lord Vesemir, we will leave your vulture’s nest and you will be sure that you shall not need to trouble yourself with your king ever again. Your dues are paid, keep your gold and your bedwarmer, and I will keep well my kingdom.” 
You stare stunned from the corner. Ezme winces as the furor of the king’s fury lingers in the air. That horrid bang echoes over and over in your mind. You can’t help but whimper in surprise as suddenly you are seized around your sleeve. The king moves quicker than you can think. 
He hauls you away from the wall and towards the door Vesemir’s sigh fans from his nose, “I tried, dove.” 
The king swings the door inward and urges you without. He does not close it as he marches down the corridor, his grasp tight around your wrist. You scramble to keep up, soles scuffing, fingers throbbing as his grip threatens to crack your bones. 
You whine, “your highness.” 
He carries on as your toes flutter over the stone. You can’t keep up. You will surely fall and your hand should fall off for the swelling of blood. You grab at his sleeve and speak louder 
“Your highness, please, I beg you, it hurts,” you plea. 
He falters and spins back to you. He stares at you with his golden irises and the angles of his face soften. His gaze meets the vice of his hold on you and he releases you all at once, hovering his hand, turning it to examine his own palm. He drops his arm straight. 
“My summer maid,” he breathes, “I apologise, I did not... I would never hurt you. Not with meaning. I was only...” He reaches sheepishly to pet your shoulder, “are you alright?” 
“Your highness,” you rub your wrist, “I understand. I was only afraid--” 
“Yes, yes, the lord does mean to sabotage us,” he growls, “I will not let him. You cannot stray. You will remain with me for the night and in the morning, we shall go.” 
“As you wish, your highness,” you accede and dip your chin. 
He sighs through his nose as he tickles your neck then slowly draws away, “would you stay? If he’d asked you and not me?” 
You keep your eyes down. You cannot let him see your doubt. Truly you do not know the answer but that uncertainty is as wretched as disloyalty. 
“I would go wherever you will have me,” you assure him. 
“Yes, I know, treasure,” he brings both hands to cradle your face, raising it up, “it is fates that prized me with a creature so loyal as you. I would not squander this good fortune which has brought us together. I will not risk it, I will not risk you. I will protect you forever, my treasure.” 
You try to smile but your cheeks tremor and your eyes glisten. Your heart is racing and you shiver for more than the corridor’s chill. You can sense the danger of his words and that very moment. 
“You fear me?” He searches your face. “No, you needn’t. It is those who wish to oppose us, who should ever dare plot against me who should fear me.” 
His thumbs run over your cheek bones as his lip curls and again, he pulls his touch away from you. He reaches for your hand, twining his finger through yours, and clings to you, firm, but much less painfully than before. He leads you onward and you can only follow. That is your only course from there on, to go where he bids. 
He is intent on his path, he does not waver. He takes you to the tower and points you up the twisted stairs ahead of him. You climb up to the chamber that greets you with the same ominous air. It feels a cell even with its blazing hearth. 
The king follows you in. The hinges whine, the hooped handle clangs on the wood, and you’re shut in once more. The winds wail outside the walls loudly. 
“Where is your cloak?” The king asks as he trods the wooden floor. 
“In... the chamber I slept--” 
“I will have it brought in the morn,” he assures, “you won’t need it until then.” 
He pulls his sleeves down his arms and sheds his overcoat. You linger by the door and watch him with dread. He is intent as he tugs the tail of his shirt free of his breeches, half of it is already untucked. He is dishevelled in his own way. You’ve always noted he is rather orderly in his appearance, even amid the dirt of the road. 
He strips his shirt off and piles it in the seat of a chair with his coat. He strides to the table and the basin of clear water atop it. He scrubs his face and hands, then his chest. He is intent in the act as you teeter on your feet. 
“Please, you will retire,” he insists without looking back, washing himself as fervently as he can. The noise of the water plucks in the air, “I will join you short, treasure. I only seek to scrub away the day’s filth.” 
“Yes, your highness,” you acquiesce. 
You sit to unlace your boots and peel off your stockings. Next, you remove your apron and loose the top of your dress. You fold it all neatly on the bench at the bottom of the bed. You approach the towering post in all but your shift and nestle under the blankets. You lay and listen to the king’s activity. 
Despite it all, the bed is warm. You can’t help but bask in the welcome of the layers of wool and linen. You’re startled as the king’s silhouette appears at the bottom of the bed frame and he lifts the end of the heavy covers, slipping a warm shape beneath. The hot brick radiates from the foot of the mattress nicely. 
He retreats and a sharp blow puts out the flame of the lantern. The hearth provides the only light as it flickers around his looming shadow. You stare at the door as you fold into yourself. 
He circles around the other side, behind you, and his weight jostles the mattress as he crawls in behind you. He moves close to you, his hand grazing over your shift, lingering on your hip and creeping up your side. He pulls you onto your back as he slides his arm beneath your head. 
You let him move you as he desires. He commands without words. The thick hair along his torso is still damp. He holds you against him, touching your cheeks, tracing your jaw and throat, admiring you in the dim glow. He purrs and presses his lips to yours. 
When he pulls away, he lets his head rest on the pillow. You feel his gaze still as he plays with the strings of your shift. He moves even closer and nuzzles your hair. 
“This is where you belong, treasure. Near to me,” he rasps, “I shall never let them take you from me.” 
⚔️
Sleep is chased away by the wind. That without keeps you awake, along with the hot gust of the king’s breath. His snug hold on you, his constancy even in his slumber, the heat of his body adds to your restlessness. 
You feel him stir and close your eyes. You feign the sleep you’re so desperate for. His breath rises from his nose like a wolf’s growl. He shifts cautiously, as if not to disturb you, and drags his arm out from around you. He leaves a doleful kiss on your cheek and sits up. 
The bed groans with his weight. You dare to peek through the slits of your eyelids as he turns to sit with his back to you. His flesh is ridged with scars, rippled with the battles fought and won, the years marked into his very body. He hangs his head and holds it in his hands. You languish in his rumination. 
The fire crackles softly. He looks over stiffly and stands with a heave. He is completely naked. You hadn’t realised. He goes to the hearth and feeds it. He groans at the effort and stands straight. 
His figure is lit by the amber glow as he watches the flames. You can see why he has no fear. He is built unlike any man you’ve seen. He is power incarnate. He is the king of legends. 
“I would lay down my crown in this very second for you, treasure,” he says.  
You squeeze your eyes shut. Does he know you are awake? You don’t move for fear that he only speaks to himself. 
“How cursed I am. I’ve won a kingdom I could not care for. Not if it would cost me you,” he murmurs to the fire. His voice is so low that he cannot possibly mean for you to hear. “How I dream of sweeping you away. We should steal a horse from the stables and secret our love away into the wilds.” 
He sniffs, “we would find a place in the hinter. I could build a house, you could mind the hearth, and I would hunt the elk... we could be just husband and wife. Not king and maid. We could be... happy.” 
He heaves as your heartbeat pulses behind your ears. You hear him moving, towards the bed, towards you. The mattress once more shifts and the blankets lift. He slips in next to you and lays back heavily. 
“My treasure, what you cannot know. How deeply I love you. I long for you with my entire being,” he lays flat next to you, rigid and hot as his arm presses to yours. You will yourself to stone; still as a statue. “I ache for you... to hold you, to kiss you...”  
His arm moves and the blanket ripples against you. You focus on your breaths, keeping them slow and deep, hiding beneath the facade of slumber. “...to have you under me...” the subtle brush of the blankets continues, tickling you, threatening to break your defence, “to have you touch me too...” his voice is strained as the bed shakes with the building tempo. 
What is it he does? Why is he so breathless? It is only his long groans that assure you of his elicit act. That he touches himself as he speaks of his desire. 
“I should like... to taste you...” he puts his hand on your thigh. You nearly flinch as he swirls his fingertips against your shift, “I should like to feel you around me. How delicate... how warm... how...” 
He moans and bites down, carrying on as his fingertips curl into your thigh. His words fracture around his grunts and he pumps himself fervently. You shield yourself behind your eyelids. You try not to hear, not to feel, not to be. 
When at last his voice piques and he spasms beside you, your name wafts from his mouth, silty and thick. His hand slips between your thighs and lays over your cunt. He lingers there, pressing down to feel you before he retracts his arm, rolling onto his side. 
“I will wait,” he resigns, “but I shall claim you, my treasure.” 
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jujutsukaisenwriting · 18 days ago
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JJK Men Relationship Headcanons
Note: these are the hcs I believe would be true for JJK characters based on manga & anime!
Gojo Satoru:
Anxious / avoidant attachment type
Can be ignorant towards partner’s needs and is not the best listener BUT can learn
Is not familiar with the “compromise” concept
Kinda delulu about how life works due to his upbringing and powers
His love language is words of affirmation and quality time
Is very clingy due to his own insecurities and doesn’t understand why you’d need “alone time” if you two are together, duh
On a brighter note, is really caring and VERY loyal to the person whom he genuinely loves
Nanami Kento:
Though Nanami is considered a green flag, I have a feeling he might be a bit over-controlling or “I know better” type
Like, he’ll do anything for you but he might not consider whether you need it in the first place
Is SO GOOD at communicating though
Also, his kink is spoiling you
The first months of the relationship might be bumpy as he might try to do everything “by rules” aka “as it’s supposed to be”
DAD MATERIAL
Aoi Todo:
Honestly? One of the greenest flags (in addition to Yuji and Choso)
Loving, attentive, caring, protective but not possessive… I can honestly go on forever
Always looks and smells great (WHICH IS CANON BTW)
Knows what he wants and goes for it
Is also very respectful and is most probably a great listener
I see him as the most reasonable and reliable person to get into a relationship with and I’ll die on that hill
Toji Fushiguro:
Unpopular opinion but he is a) fine and b) actually ready for a relationship
Like come on, the guy was happily married
He will probably have trust issues at first due to trauma and it will take quite some time for him to open up
Over protective and might be hard to negotiate with, at least during the first half a year or so
Is falsely accused of not giving a shit or being too cold / distant. In reality, he is pretty caring and intense about his emotions
Choso Kamo:
Another unpopular opinion but I don’t really like when he is portrayed as super vulnerable, inexperienced, “baby princess” and etc
Choso is BADASS
Super protective and caring but also believes in people whom he loves and lets them go out there and test their limits
Meaning, he’d probable be worried sick for you but won’t lock you down in case of danger
Can be a bit too clingy and insecure in a relationship
A great listener and learner and is very grounded and reasonable
His best quality is that Choso is not afraid to walk up to people and ask questions if he has doubts about anything
Yuji Itadori:
My boy is another green flag
Yuji has a unique ability to see beyond one’s appearance and recognize inner beauty in people
He is very fun to be around but can be serious when needed
I feel he is great at communicating his feelings and thoughts and expects the same from his partner
Is very creative and takes initiative a lot
Might not take hints well due to him being extremely straightforward but that’s not really a flaw
Hiromi Higuruma:
Another overworking husband
Don’t hate me but I feel like Hiromi is slightly better in communication and the overall relationship thing than Nanami
He has this calm vibe of a good listener around him
I believe he’d actually care not to overwork too much so he can spend more time with his partner
Will buy you flowers regularly - but will use calendar reminders for that (which still counts)
Might worry too much about not spending enough time with you
Always makes you laugh
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bunnliix · 5 months ago
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When Eight Becomes Nine - Chapter Ten
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okie, this is a long chapter. I didn't mean for it to get this long, but here it is! Also I apologize in advance for the ending.
Pairing: Ateez x 9th member!reader  Summary: The aftermath of Hongjoong and y/n's little cuddle session, and a decision is made. wc: 3.3k AU: a/b/o  Genre: Fluff/Angst  warnings: yelling, screaming, Angst, Hongjoong's room, crying, aftermath of Hongjoong's room (it's nothing graphic or bad, but like someone gets in trouble and gets sent to Hongjoong's room and yeah. There are tears and sadness), name calling (idiot), Wooyoung being dramatic!, Seonghwa being done, Ateez being touchy feely, anxiety, self-doubts?, almost injuries? like injuries could have happened, but they didn't, zoning out, derogatory names and slut-shaming, use of the word slut in a derogatory way, y/n gets slut-shamed despite nothing actually happening, fighting, and I think that's it?? masterlist
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San woke up, finding that their pack alpha and omega were missing from the pack den. It wasn’t unusual for Hongjoong-hyung to go missing, but for Seonghwa-hyung to not be here was odd as well. Fortunately for the beta, the mystery of where the older omega had disappeared to, would be solved quickly as the omega in question silently opened the door and walked into the room. 
Seeing San awake, Seonghwa jumped slightly. “I didn’t mean to wake you up, Sannie sweetheart.” Seonghwa apologized, unsure of when the beta woke up.
“I woke up when you had already left, hyung. You didn’t wake me.” San replied, voice gravelly as he had just woken up.
“Oh, that’s good then. You can go back to sleep now.” The omega told him, smiling.
“Where’s Joong-hyung?” The younger man asked.
“He fell asleep in the living room. I couldn’t wake him up to bring him back in here, so I left him there.”
“Do we know if y/n is awake yet? She’s slept for a long time.”
“She was awake. She’s gone back to bed now, since no one will be up soon.”
“Is she okay?” San asked, voice filled with concern.
“I think she will be.” Seonghwa reassured him, before pulling the beta down into the nest with him, “Now, let’s sleep, shall we?” He asked, though it wasn’t really an ask at all.
San nodded, letting his head be pulled into his hyung’s neck, breathing in the calming scent of lavender and chamomile as he drifted back into dreamland once again. Seonghwa wasn’t too far behind him, and the two remained intertwined as they both slept peacefully.
Unknown to either of them, San hadn’t been the only one awake in the nest. Wooyoung had overheard their conversation, being that he was laid right next to Sannie, though now Seonghwa-hyung was right next to him instead. He pouted that Hwa-hyung had gotten to see and talk to his baby omega. He wanted to be the first one to see her this morning, and since she was awake not long ago, it shouldn’t be hard to wake her up again. He’s barely gotten to spend time with her - completely ignoring the fact that he’s monopolized her time since she’s arrived here - and he wanted to learn even more about her, about his new member and baby omega. (Honestly Wooyoung might just be more delulu than Atinys are)
He found that Yeosang had clung to him while they were sleeping, and though he tried to pull himself out of the alpha’s grip, he was unable to do so. He watched as Yeosang’s eyes fluttered open, locking onto him as soon as the other man was awake enough to realize where he was.
“And what do you think you’re trying to do, pretty ‘mega?” the fairy-like alpha asked.
Wooyoung chuckled nervously, “Nowhere, just needed to get a bit comfier, that’s all.” He said, and by the look on his friend’s face, he was nowhere near convincing enough.
“Sure. You definitely weren’t about to sneak out and try and see the omega sleeping in Hongjoong-hyung’s room.” The elder, though only by months, man said, completely unconvinced.
The omega pouted, looking away from his alpha pack mate. Fingers gripped his chin and turned his head so that he had to look at his friend. “We can go and wait in the living room for her to wake up. But I won't allow you to go in and wake her. She deserves to not be woken up by you jumping on top of her.” Yeosang told his friend.
And with that, Yeosang carefully pulled the two of them into a sitting position in the nest, before looking around to see if any of the others had woken up, finding that they were the only two awake. He then stood up, pulling Wooyoungie up as well and exiting the room silently. The two idols followed the smell of coffee and vanilla, just as Seonghwa had earlier, though there were other scents that were unfamiliar. Walking into the living room, they found their captain and their guest cuddling together on the couch.
“What?! Why does Hongjoong-hyung get to cuddle my baby omega, but not me!?” Wooyoung shouted, shocking the two on the couch out of their peaceful sleep. Yeosang immediately slapped a hand over Wooyoung’s mouth, but the damage had been done.
Y/n bolted up out of her sleep, knocking heads with Hongjoong and they both cried out in pain. The two turned to see that it was each other that they had bumped into, and blushes and stammered words were their responses to the situation they had ended up in.
“Look what you’ve done, you idiot.” Yeosang scolded Wooyoung, who pouted at being scolded, but ultimately looked concerned as to the pain the alpha and omega pair on the couch were in.
“Are you okay?” Hongjoong asked y/n, concerned about her.
She groaned but nodded, feeling disoriented from barely being awake and then the pain from knocking heads with Hongjoong. The alpha moved to check her head, making sure there were no bumps or anything to be concerned about. There he found the bruises from yesterday, and grew concerned over it, but he knew that it wasn’t the time to bring that up. Thankfully, she didn’t have any bumps from their little clash, and he sighed in relief before setting his sights on the omega who caused this to happen.
“Wooyoung, you better have a damn good reason for yelling.” He said, his voice almost a growl by the end. Wooyoung shrunk and hid behind Yeosang, hoping that the other alpha would save him from their pack alpha. Yeosang, being smart and not having a death wish, pulled away from his friend, leaving him in full view of their pack alpha.
“Sangieeee, how could you leave me to die?!” Wooyoung shouted dramatically.
“You did this to yourself. Deal with the consequences.” Yeosang said to his friend.
“Yah! You betrayed me!”
“And you woke y/n-ssi and I from our sleep. All because you had to yell. My room, now.” The captain said to the younger idol, with no room for argument. Wooyoung knew that, and started to slink off to Hongjoong’s room, dreading what was to come.
However, he stopped as the rest of Ateez filed out into the living room, having been woken up by the commotion in the living room. Their sleepy footsteps had gone unnoticed in the back and forth chatter, though all eyes looked to the remaining five as they took stock of the four who were already in the living room.
“Wooyoung,” Seonghwa started, his voice sickly sweet, “did you wake up Hongjoong and y/nnie?” He asked, though he already knew the answer.
Wooyoung started to back away, knowing he was already completely fucked. “Um, would you accept no as an answer?” He replied.
Seonghwa, ignoring everyone else in the room, stalked over to his baby omega, and grabbed the idol by the back of his shirt, pulling him away to Hongjoong’s room, calling out to the pack alpha as he did so. “Darling, we have an omega to talk to. Come on, don’t be late.” Hongjoong, knowing it wasn’t good to dilly dally when Seonghwa was in this type of mood, smiled down at y/n, covering her with the blanket before following behind the two omegas.
Yeosang approached the couch, as did the others, slightly crowding around y/n, who was still sleepy and confused about what happened.
“I’m sorry that Wooyoung woke you up, y/n-ssi.” Jongho apologized, voice a bit gruff from sleep.
“It’s okay. Will he be okay?” Y/n asked them, worried for her fellow omega.
“He’ll be fine. He just needs to be reminded about what we don’t do in this pack.” Yeosang assured her.
She nodded, still concerned for what would happen to Wooyoung-oppa in Hongjoong-oppa’s room. San moved to sit down next to her, Yeosang taking up the other spot on the opposite side of her, as the other three settled down around her as well. 
“Did you sleep well?” San asked, absentmindedly playing with the blanket on top of y/n.
“I did. I really didn’t mean to fall asleep on Hongjoong-ssi though. I’m sorry.” She said, bowing in apology after finishing.
“Why are you apologizing?” Mingi questioned, looking confused.
“I fell asleep on your pack alpha, I shouldn’t have done that.” She explained like it was obvious.
Yunho cut in, “It’s okay. If hyung hadn’t wanted you to fall asleep on him, he would have said something. And if he is okay with it, then we have no room to argue or get mad at you for it. It’s okay, truly.”
She nodded, still not really believing them. She knew different packs had different boundaries, and she herself had very limited experience with packs, outside of her own family pack, but it felt wrong to have done that, without any of the others permission.
San, sensing a bit of discomfort from her, reached out to grab her hand, his grip loose enough for her to slip out of it if she truly didn’t want him to hold onto her hand. He looked down at her, “Truly, it’s okay y/n. I can promise you as the pack beta of the Ateez pack, that none of us have felt uncomfortable by any of your actions, and Hongjoong wouldn’t have comforted you as he did this morning and last night, if he didn’t want to.” He told her, trying to convey to her the honesty in his words.
She looked up at him, and she could hear and see the truth to his words. To be frank, she never held any distrust in their words, it was more of a her problem than anything else. “Thank you, San-ssi.” She thanked him.
“No problem, and you can drop the formality. You can call me, San, San-oppa, Sannie, anything you want.” He told her, pulling her in for a quick side hug before pulling away again.
Y/n felt her cheeks heat up as San pulled away, unsure of how to react to how touchy everyone seemed to be now. Sure, some of them were touchy before, cough cough Wooyoung cough cough, but it felt very odd for the others to be so touchy with her. She shrugged it off as everyone was still trying to shrug off the last slivers of sleep.
Yunho felt his phone buzz in the pocket of his sweatpants, pulling it out to find a message from their manager, wondering where they were. He finally looked at the time and realized that they were scheduled to be at the company 30 minutes ago.
“So, we have to run. We were supposed to be at the company 30 minutes ago. I’ll get the three in hyung’s room. The rest of you, get dressed please. Yeosang, San, team up and find some clothing for y/n please. She doesn’t need to go back into the company in yesterday’s clothes, and we don’t have time to stop by your dorm. I’m sorry.” Yunho took charge, directing everyone and looking over to the smallest of them all, apologizing to her.
She waved off his apologies, telling him it was okay as San pulled her off the couch and led her away, Yeosang tagging along and walking behind the two. Yunho set off to get the remaining three on track to leave the dorm. Arriving quickly at the captain’s room, he knocked on the door, receiving a “come in” from two out of the three within the room. He opened the door to find Wooyoung with tear tracks down his cheeks, as he was held in between the two eldest members of the group.
“We’re 30 minutes late. We have to go, hyung is wondering where we are.” He informed the trio. Hongjoong immediately moved off of the bed, heading into his closet to get ready. Seonghwa wiped the remaining tears off of Wooyoung’s face, before coaxing the younger omega to slide off the bed as well, guiding him out of the room with words of comfort whispered in his ears. He stopped in front of Yunho, pulling one arm away from the younger omega to wrap around the taller man’s head, pulling him down to kiss his forehead. “Thank you Yun-sweetie. I know you wrangled the others for us. Now go get ready yourself. Joongie and I will handle it from here, okay?” The eldest told him, before releasing him and walking away with Wooyoung.
Yunho quickly left to his own room, and it wasn’t long before the nine of them all met back up in the living room, which still had the remnants of the late night activities of Hongjoong. The alpha in question quickly moved to pack up his laptop and headphones, as he would be bringing them with him today.
“Okay, are we all ready?” Seonghwa asked in his normal soft tone of voice, receiving many nods and other affirmative responses. He became the leader of the line of idols and y/n as they made their way to the door. Mingi once again, the sweetheart he is, knelt down to tie y/n’s shoelaces for her, smiling up at her once he finished before standing up and leaving through the front door. She didn’t realize how long she stared until Seonghwa came up to her, a gentle arm wrapping around her shoulders and guiding her out the door as well, pulling the door closed behind the two of them.
“Let’s get down to the car, shall we? The others are waiting, baby omega.” He said, his voice soft and kind as she smelt the same lavender and chamomile scent that was on the blanket. He must have been the one to find Hongjoong-oppa and her this morning, before Wooyoung violently woke them up. She nodded, and let him lead her down to the van waiting outside their dorm.
Seonghwa pushed her inside first, where she took the empty spot next to Jongho, while the taller omega took his spot next to Hongjoong and Wooyoung, the other omega still looking a bit rough, but it seems that he would be okay, like the others had said. 
The car quickly took off, before y/n was able to buckle in, and Jongho’s hand immediately shot out to prevent her from falling forwards and bumping her head on something. He pulled her back into her seat, quickly finding the seatbelt and buckling her in. “Be careful, we don’t want you getting hurt. It wouldn’t be a good look if management heard that we let you get hurt.” Jongho said to her, before pulling his phone out and texting someone.
Y/n looked away, pulling out her own phone, finally taking a moment to herself, even if she was in the van surrounded by all eight members of Ateez. She took a moment to look down at her outfit. Yeosang and San had managed to pull together an outfit that mostly fit her. She had been given a pair of Hongjoong’s sweatpants that had ended up in Yeosang’s closet, and her socks were from Wooyoung, while her top was from San, so it was a bit big on her in places. The hoodie she wore on top came from Mingi, who draped it over her head as he walked by the trio in the hallway. The scent of wood and leather was almost embedded in the hoodie, and she recognized it as one he’s worn on more than one occasion. She felt grateful that the alpha would lend her an item he clearly treasured, considering how much his scent surrounded it.
It didn’t take long to reach the company, or maybe y/n just got a bit too absorbed in her phone to realize how long or short the drive was. Her shoulder being shaken pulled her out of wherever her brain went, and she looked over to see that it was Yunho who was shaking her.
“Are you okay?” He asked her, looking concerned, “I can have the driver take you back to the dorm if you’re not feeling well enough to be here today.” He told her, giving her the option.
She shook her head, unbuckling her seatbelt and exiting the car, where she found the other seven were waiting for her, all of their eyes on her form. She looked down, avoiding their eyes for a moment until Wooyoung came by her side and grabbed her hand.
“Come on, let’s go inside already. There’s no use standing around out here.” He said, pulling her along as the others seemed to surround the two of them, almost like mini-bodyguards. It seemed that the older omega’s words broke the tension, and everyone started chatting, including her in the conversation as well, not letting her feel left out.
They quickly arrived at the meeting room that the boys had been told to meet at, where they found the entirety of the other auditionees as well as Ateez’s management team. They filed in, Wooyoung still holding y/n’s hand, and it seemed that all of the auditionee’s attention went to the two omega’s connection, before they looked away, speaking to each other. Y/n knew it most likely was gossip about her, and she tried to sneakily pull her hand away from where Wooyoung had gripped it, only for the older omega to hold her hand even tighter.
“What’s this meeting about?” Hongjoong asked, raising an eyebrow.
“We’ve set up a meeting to talk about the newest member of Ateez. Y/n-ssi, please take a seat over with the other auditionees.” One of the staff spoke up, before directing her to take a seat.
Y/n moved over to the group, doing her best to ignore the whispers they clearly wanted her to overhear. She sat down next to Aaron, the only person who seemed to be nice to her.
“Where did you go yesterday? You never came back to the dorms last night. And now you walked in with Ateez?” He questioned her.
“I happened to meet up with them in the foyer of the company, and since we were all heading to the same place, I came with them.” She said, ignoring the other question.
Aaron opened his mouth to try and pull more answers out of her, but was stopped by one of Ateez’s managers clearing his voice before speaking. “So, we’ve gathered here to talk about the ninth member of Ateez. Since we’ve had a couple days to evaluate your abilities, we’ve decided it’s time to come to a decision.” He explained.
“We think we’ve made our decision on who we want to be our final member. They have great dancing and singing skills, and they seem to get along well with others.” Seonghwa spoke.
“Well, maybe we’ve thought of the same person then. We wanted to present Aaron to you as the ninth member of Ateez. He’s got the qualities of what makes Ateez, Ateez. Plus, he’ll blend in well, being another guy.” The staff member spoke, seemingly very excited.
“What?! I was told that this would be our decision, not yours.” Hongjoong quickly spoke out.
“Well, you’ve clearly spent a lot of time with the omega of the auditionees, and maybe they would work well in a girl group, but the staff who have observed you all, think that Aaron is the best fit as the final member of the group.” The staff member continued.
“I think we have some say in who our last member is, considering that they will have to live with us.” Seonghwa said, supporting Hongjoong.
“Yeah! We want baby omega to be our ninth member!” Wooyoung cried out.
“Well, I guess sleeping with the members is one way to get what you want. But really, did you ever think the staff would be supportive of an omega slut becoming the newest member of Ateez? You omegas think that you can get whatever you want by flashing and giving away your body to alphas, but you won’t get away with it this time.” She heard in her ear as she watched the idols she had grown close to, fight their management for her.
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allur1ngs · 11 months ago
Text
✮ a whisper of our love ✮
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TW: don’t let the cute visuals deceive you this is pure ANGST to fluff, delulu bada strikes again, bada doesn’t know how to process her emotions but it’s okay she’s trying, reader is a chronic sweetie pie no one hate on her or i’ll find you, character death, guns, blood, descriptions of injury, grieving, emotional trauma, survivor’s guilt!! flashbacks in this fic are indicated by italicized text, sweet smut (dom & top!bada sub & bottom!reader, fingering–r!receiving, oral–bada!receiving, finger sucking–bada!receiving, scissoring/tribbing whatever you wanna call it–both!receiving obvs, tit sucking–r!receiving, a bit of spit… sorry, lots of praise & fluffy love–r!receiving) aftercare happens out of the fic
SUMMARY: bada confronts years of profound emotional turmoil to embrace the depths of her affection for you.
WC: 16.1k…no comment
A/N: find more information about this au on my masterlist! ...here it is!! the long-awaited official first kiss + first i love you, as well as first time together as a couple!! ngl i’m really proud of this one. many (not so obvious too) plot points come together this time so keep an eye out for them!! again–please ignore any spelling errors this is so long–& this one might be a bit heavy around the middle part so please take care of yourself!! but enjoy!!
DISCLAIMER: all characteristics portrayed are purely speculation and fiction, they are not meant to reflect bada or team bebe’s actual character, values, or attitudes. please keep this in mind!!
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Several months after the Seong incident, it finally felt like things were going back to normal. You got back into the swing of things, embracing your time in the Lee mansion, and rarely leaving unless you got antsy. You became much more vigilant while out, carefully observing your surroundings and never straying too far away from Hyo’s side. Malls, grocery stores, and casual strolls became few and far between, but at your behest. You gained a sense of normalcy staring at the same large walls and divots in your home—happy with your life as it is, everything felt complete.
Bada, on the other hand, who had become increasingly protective to the point she had been somewhat clingy, was finally starting to ease back into her busy work schedule, her visitations becoming rarer. Although you felt a bit melancholic at the fact that she was pulling away from you, you accepted that work would always be a large part of Bada’s life – whether either liked it or not. 
Thoughts such as these swirl in your mind as you get ready for a new day, rays of warm beige sunlight peaking through your mesh curtains and swirling in the air of your room. Every part of your body feels relaxed, muscles moving fluidly as you dress yourself up. Today, you’d invited your friends over – with Bada’s permission, of course – for a small get-together. A real one.
They’d been nagging you for days on end about seeing you again, and after finally breaking under the pressure, you invited them to come over and have breakfast with you, then take a nice dip in the infinity pool. You could practically hear the squeals of excitement through the all-caps text messages they’d responded with, all agreeing to your proposal and before conversing about what bathing suit they’d bring.
Now, on the day of their arrival, you get ready slightly earlier than you normally do, preparing accordingly for your friends.
“Good morning, Hyo.” You greet your bodyguard with a smile as you step out of your bedroom.
“Good morning, kid.” She nods. “Up and about already?”
“Yup,” you begin walking down the hallway, Hyo following you without a second thought. “The girls are coming over today for breakfast.”
“Right,” Hyo acknowledges. “You bought all those groceries yesterday for them.”
“Mhm,” you nod. “I need to get started on the cooking so that the food is ready for them when they arrive.”
“What a great hostess you are.” Hyo lightly teases you.
“Please, it’s just common courtesy.” You have a hand in dismissal. “Besides, knowing Jae, she’ll be crying about how she’s ‘so hungry’ the second she gets here.”
“Jae…” Hyo trails off, her mind wandering back to the day you’d been kidnapped, and how the woman had aided in your rescue. “I can tell you two care about each other a lot.”
“We do.” You turn into the kitchen, greeting the staff that’s already busy at work. "She's the first friend I made and the longest-lasting friendship I've ever had."
“How long?” Hyo asks, leaning against the counter as you begin to take out ingredients.
“Let’s see…” you pause, thinking to yourself. “about… fifteen years now, give or take a year or so.”
Hyo whistles loudly, sucking her teeth. “That’s a very long time.”
“It is,” you nod, “but really, it doesn’t feel that way. She’s always keeping me on my toes.”
Hyo snorts, “I can tell.” You lightly elbow her in the shoulder before focusing back on the food in front of you. “So, how’d you meet the rest of them?”
“Through my parents and school.” You start chopping some of the fresh vegetables on a newly cleaned chopping board. “I met Min-Ji not too long after Jae. She was the class president, and I was one of the top students, so we naturally clicked. Our parents also were long-time friends, so that was another factor, of course.”
“Min-Ji… which one was she?” Hyo crosses her arms across her chest, trying to remember the faces of your friends from the party.
“She was wearing a black cocktail dress. She has long black hair–”
“Ah, yes.” Hyo snaps her fingers. “I remember. She had a very mature look.”
“That’s because she’s the oldest out of all of us.” You nod. “Da-Eun is the second oldest. She’s the sporty type.”
“Was she the one that almost attacked me for pulling you out of the house?” Hyo scoffs.
“Yes,” you laugh, “that was Da-Eun. But don’t hold it against her, she’s very hot-headed and protective by nature.”
“I won’t.” Hyo shrugs. “I think it’s important to have friends that care about you.”
“I agree. They’ve all got me through some tough times.” You move around the kitchen, pulling out spices and seasoning the food. “What about you, Hyo?”
“My friends…” she lets out a long sigh. “Are all the Bebe girls, Boss, and you.”
You give Hyo a bright smile, nudging her shoulder, “Aww, you really do consider me your friend.”
“Are you really that surprised?” She chuckles.
“No, I knew you couldn’t resist my friendly disposition.” you wink at her playfully.
“Right…” she trails off. “So what’s on the menu?”
“I’m making kimchi pancakes, and egg rolls.” You say, while beating the eggs.
“Do you need help, Ms. Lee?” The head cook suddenly cuts in, offering to cook for you.
“Oh no, it’s alright.” You kindly dismiss. “I’ve got it.”
The head cook lightly bows before returning to preparing Bada’s breakfast.
You glance at Hyo from the corner of your eye, motioning her to come closer. She raises her eyebrows, but complies. “I still find it a bit strange that all the staff call me Ms. Lee.” You whisper to her.
“Well, you are engaged to the Boss,” Hyo whispers back.
“But we’re not married yet.” You point out.
“In their minds, you already are. You’re the Boss’s wife.”
Hearing it said aloud makes it more real. Although you’ve been living in the Lee mansion, and getting to know everyone, it slips your mind that this large building will officially become your home in a few months. That all the staff will be working for you – though technically they already are – that Bada’s business will, in some ways, be yours as well.
You will have her last name. You will be her wife.
As if in a trance, you move about the kitchen on autopilot, cooking, and eventually cleaning once you’re finished.
And like divine timing, the doorbell from the very front gate sounds, ringing in the living room and kitchen, taking you by surprise. “They’re here.” You mumble, hurriedly plating the kimchi pancakes, egg rolls, and their drinks.
It takes them a few minutes to get past security detail – although Bada agreed to let them visit, her only caveat was that they’d need to go through extensive security, for your protection, of course. But the second they step into the living room, all of their eyes widen, stars in their irises as they take in the diamond teardrop chandelier, and the golden-trimmed decorations glittering in the morning sun.
“This looks like the inside of Buckingham Palace.” Jae awes, her hand covering her agape mouth.
“How do you know what the inside of Buckingham Palace looks like?” Da-Eun raises an eyebrow at the younger woman.
Jae playfully glares at her friend, smacking her on the shoulder lightly. “It was just an expression.”
“Control yourselves.” Min-Ji cuts in, trying to contain the look of utter shock and amazement marring her expression. “We’re in someone else’s home now, so no funny business.”
“Where’s unnie?” Ryung speaks up, looking around the vast living room for you.
“Sorry–” you walk in from the kitchen carrying plates in your hands, Hyo following close behind with some across her arms as well. “I would have greeted you right when you came in but I just finished plating the food.”
“Food?” Jae exclaims, her eyes lighting up like a Christmas tree. “You made food for us?”
“You really didn’t have to–” Min-Ji says humbly.
You give them lightly scolding looks as you place down their food on the long dining table. It’s decorated to perfection; a crisp white tablecloth draped over the walnut wood table. Lit candelabras that drip hot candle wax rest in the center and outermost edges, small vases with blossoming flowers accompanying them. And to top it all off, in front of each dining chair, fine china and crystal wine glasses with embossed detailing are set aside next to firmly polished silverware.
“I invited you all over for breakfast, did you really think I wouldn’t serve any food?”
“We thought you would just let the staff make it instead,” Da-Eun admits.
“No, they’re already very busy preparing breakfast for Bada and Bebe.” You wave a hand in dismissal. “I didn’t want to burden them with any more work.”
“That’s so sweet of you!” Jae practically squeals, throwing herself at you and squeezing you tight in a hug.
You let out a small “oof” at the action, but eventually laugh and hug your best friend back. You stay like that only a minute before the sound of tiny sniffles reaches your ears, making you take a step back with a worried expression. Jae stares back at you with tears in her eyes, and a distressed look on her face. “Jae?” You say softly. “What’s wrong?”
“Unnie…” she trails off, her voice getting gradually louder. “You scared me!” She lunges forward, holding onto you like a koala bear while she sobs.
“Wha–”
“When you got kidnapped I was so scared! I really thought I’d never see you again.” She practically wails.
You look up from your best friend’s figure, your eyes locking with the other girls. They all wear solemn expressions, either looking at the ground or staring at you hollowly. Your heart squeezes in your chest, the realization that you hadn’t seen your friends face to face since that day finally dawning on you.
For hours, they must have been waiting at home, terrified out of their minds, wondering if you were dead.
You pat Jae on the back, comforting her. “I’m so sorry I worried you all.”
“We felt like it was our fault,” Ryung speaks up, hanging her head. “If we hadn’t thrown that party, you wouldn’t have been kidnapped.”
“If I’d have just pummeled that creep when I got the chance–” Da-Eun clenches her fist.
“None of what happened was your fault.” You cut in, voice stern. “I agreed to go to the party, despite knowing it would be dangerous for me. It’s my fault.”
The girls seem to perk up at your words, but only slightly.
“And Da-Eun, if you’d punched Seong, you probably would have ended up being taken hostage like me, or worse.” You point out. “Now stop commiserating and eat the breakfast I made for you.”
The girls reluctantly listen to you, all of them choosing a seat before thanking you for the food once again and digging in. Conversation flows easily after that, the topic of Seong and your kidnapping left far behind. Instead, you talk about lighter subjects, like what the girls had been up to while you recovered.
Once you all top off your breakfast, you walk your plates over to the kitchen and place them in the sink to clean them.
“Ms. Lee, would you like me to wash the dishes for you?” The head cook pops out of the kitchen, standing in front of you with his hands behind his back.
“Oh, it’s alright, we should do it.” You say, the girls behind you letting out murmurs of agreement as well.
The cook once again looks surprised but nods, ducking back into the kitchen as you begin cleaning.
"Ms. Lee, huh?" Jae playfully bumps your hip.
You let out a long sigh while chuckling. "I haven't gotten used to it yet."
"Well, you'd better because, in a matter of months, you'll be Mrs. Lee, the wife of the most powerful mafia boss in Seoul." Jae looks up at the sky, a giddy grin on her face.
"When is the wedding, by the way?" Min-Ji asks.
"Ah, we still haven't decided on a date yet," you mumble, having finished cleaning your plate, "but I think sometime in December."
"Oh, winter." Da-Eun nods.
"That’s a beautiful time to get married," Ryung comments.
"You know,” Jae begins. “I always thought Min-Ji would be the first of us to marry,"
"Really?" Min-Ji looks around at you all, a flush painting the apples of her cheeks.
"Well, you've had a boyfriend for what," Da-Eun starts flipping up her fingers, counting. "five years now?"
"Jung-Hoon will make a good husband," Jae remarks.
"Why are you all speaking as if we're already engaged?" Min-Ji blubbers, clearly embarrassed. "We still have a few years before we should start thinking about marriage."
"Yes, you do, Min." You call your friend by her nickname, lightly nudging Da-Eun and Jae in their sides. "You don't have to get married early like I am. It's all on your time."
With your last assertion hanging in the air, you and the girls finish cleaning up before heading toward the infinity pool on the second level of the mansion. The excitement rises between your friends the moment you step onto the terrace, their expressions starstruck at the clear water rippling against the opal tiles at the bottom of the pool.
They hurry over to the pool chairs, set down their bags, and strip their clothes off, leaving them in the swimsuits they had underneath.
"The water's so beautiful." Ryung approaches the pool, dipping her fingers into the water. "Do you go swimming often?" She asks you.
"Yes," you answer while taking off your clothing, your swimsuit catching the morning light. "It's very relaxing on warm days like this."
"I would kill to have a pool this big." Jae grabs your hands, walking you over to the steps of the pool where your friends wait for you.
You all tread in, the water fresh as it cradles the skin of your legs and chest, making you let out a content sigh. There's nothing quite like taking a dip during stifling heat.
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As it turns out, wearing a suit during one of the hottest days of the week wasn't Bada's brightest idea. The black-tinted window in her office only manages to absorb some of the sun's unrelenting heat, leaving Bada still sweating in her clothing, huffs of annoyance escaping her mouth every few minutes.
"Ugh," she groans, pushing her work away and sitting back in her chair. She spreads her legs, finding her calves unnaturally stiff—hours of sitting will do that to you, she supposes. Standing up reluctantly, Bada immediately removes her tie and suit jacket, as well as undoes the first few buttons of her dress shirt.
She fans herself with one hand, the other reaching down to grab a glass of water she'd been given with her breakfast. She chugs the liquid down in seconds, sighing when she's finished.
Steeling herself, Bada moves to sit down again but finds her legs still stiff and grunts in mild pain. So she decides not to sit down, and instead paces around her office. She loops about five times before she grows agitated and walks towards the door. She'd been working for five hours, pouring through the ceiling-high proposal documents from another group and was frankly going stir-crazy from staring at the papers.
She opens the door and leaves her office, trudging down the hallway without a destination in mind. That is, until the sound of lively chatter reaches her ears, making her pause and look around with a confused expression. She follows the noises, worry and curiosity itching at the back of her mind.
She finds the source on the second-floor terrace and pauses at the entrance, half of her body hidden in the shadows. Her eyes snap over to the unknown women swimming in her pool, the confusion in her mind only doubling. But then she sees you speaking to them casually, a bright smile on your face as you splash water at the women, all of them retaliating back and causing a water fight.
Then, it clicks in her mind. Today is the day her friends were to come over, Bada thinks. She mentally berates herself for forgetting about it—too caught up in her piles of work to remember. Before she can linger on the thought for too long, your friend's chatter dies down into a calm conversation. Bada steps back from the entryway quickly, her back laying flat against wall. She knows she give you your privacy, but despite her better judgment, she stays rooted in her spot, listening.
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"This is so nice," Da-Eun mutters with a smile, relaxing so she's floating at the water's surface.
"So," Min-Ji swims closer to you. "What have you been doing all this time?"
"Not much," you admit. "Just... recovering. I had a pretty nasty bruise on my cheek. It just finished healing."
"Just finished healing?" Ryung frowns.
"But that was a while ago..." Jae adds.
"Seong had a heavy hand," you mumble, causing little ripples in the water by swishing your fingers back and forth.
Away from your view, Bada rests her head against the wall, her eyes staring up at the ceiling as images of your injury flash in her mind. She feels a pit form in her stomach at the memory, as well as a fire burning in her veins. Although she knows Seong is already long dead, it doesn’t stop the deep hatred in her heart from festering.
"At least it healed well," Min-Ji nods, pointing her finger at your skin, which is now free of discoloration.
"Yeah," you ghost your fingers across the skin of your left cheek, remembering how swollen it had been, as well as painted with yellow and purple hues.
Jae watches your movements closely, sympathy in her irises until she realizes something, and her eyebrows furrow. "Wait..." She reaches over and grabs your hand, holding it up to the sun. "Where's your ring?"
You give her a confused look. "What ring?"
"Your engagement ring," Jae says, looking at you expectantly.
Bada freezes in her spot, a feeling akin to a cold bucket of water being dumped over her head washing through her body. A ring.
 How could she be so stupid? She never presented you with an engagement ring (not to mention she hadn’t bought one in the first place), although you're both several months into your engagement. If her mother were alive, she'd scold her for her lack of manners and for being inconsiderate of your wants—what most women want more than anything—a beautiful and heartfelt piece of jewelry that encapsulates their spouse's devotion and feelings.
"Oh..." you trail off before Jae’s words fully register in your mind. "Oh. I don't have one."
"You don't have an engagement ring?" All the girls blurt out at once, their expressions a mix between shock and horror.
“I guess we never really got around to it.” You stare down at your empty ring finger, not exactly knowing how to feel. You hadn’t even realized that Bada never presented you a ring.
“Never got around to it?” Jae’s mouth drops. “How do you ‘never get around’ to getting your engagement ring?”
“I’m surprised you don’t have a rock the size of Seoul on your finger.” Da-Eun remarks, shaking her head.
“We’ve been very busy–” you try to explain.
“But it’s a ring.” Jae asserts.
You say nothing in response, lips pressing into a line and eyebrows crinkling.
The resounding silence marinating in the air makes Bada’s stomach drop. You must think of  her as an inconsiderate fiancée.
She berates herself in her mind as she speed-walks away, determined to make up for her oversight.
She’ll find you a ring befitting of your beauty.
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Bada quickly realizes that finding the perfect engagement ring for you is more challenging than she initially thought. She's scrolled through countless websites of high-end jewelers, observing the sparkle of gold, white gold, silver – every type of finery imaginable. However, every ring she inspects falls short.
"Too gaudy," she thinks as she scans a ring with a disproportionately large diamond and a small band. "Too simple," her eyes scrutinize another ring, containing the smallest diamond she’s ever seen, with an equally bland and thin band.
In frustration, Bada pushes away her laptop, pulling her glasses onto her head and rubbing her eyes. "Why are engagement rings so hit or miss?" she asks the open air, as if expecting an answer.
Funnily enough, she does get a response. "Engagement rings?" Tatter steps into Bada’s office, carrying a large stack of paperwork.
"Tatter, if you are about to hand me another day’s work of documents, I might just lose my mind," Bada groans.
"I’m not handing it to you," Tatter says sheepishly, "I’m placing it on your desk."
Bada only groans louder, dropping her head onto the desk and lightly banging it against the wood repeatedly. "Boss…" Tatter trails off, grimacing. "You’re making me feel bad."
"Good," Bada huffs. "You should feel bad for me."
"Why are you so stressed out?" Tatter sets the papers down before stepping back.
"The ring," Bada rasps.
"What ring?" Tatter asks, her face skewed up in absolute confusion.
"The engagement ring. The one I never gave to my fiancée."
"You never gave unnie a ring?" Tatter says incredulously.
"No," Bada hollowly laments. "Now I’m trying to find a ring for her, but none of them are suitable."
"Can I see?" Tatter asks, motioning toward her boss’s laptop. Bada pushes her laptop in Tatter’s direction, showing her subordinate the screen. Tatter scans the images of the rings, pressing her lips together in thought. "This one’s nice." She points at a ring with a diamond in the middle, and two smaller diamonds next to it, resting on a thin, gold band.
Bada looks at the ring, her eyebrows furrowing. "I guess. But it’s nothing special. Her ring has to be special–"
"You know, rather than stressing out about it, why don’t you just find out what types of rings she likes?" Tatter cuts her off.
"And how do you suggest I do that?" Bada asks monotonously.
"Reconnaissance," Tatter smirks. "And I know just the perfect people for the job."
Bada picks up her head, staring at her subordinate with a wry expression – not quite sure if she should be worried or relieved.
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The following day rolls around, the heat from yesterday having subsided into a comfortable chill.
"Hey kid, are you ready to go?" Hyo steps into your bedroom, her hands in her pockets as she watches you finish getting ready.
"Yes," you nod, voice quiet.
Your bodyguard frowns, stepping forward. "What’s with the sad look?"
You glance at Hyo, shaking your head. "I just have a lot on my mind. Sorry."
"It’s okay." Hyo places her hand on your shoulder. She guides you toward the doorway, but not before discreetly pulling out her phone and snapping a picture of your open jewelry box, your rings on full display.
"Why are we going out again?" You look back at Hyo, a dazed look on your face.
"You said you wanted to go for a walk and see the shops, remember?" She reminds you, tucking her phone back into her pocket.
"Oh, right." You nod, perking up a bit. "My mother asked me to pick up something for her at a store."
"Why doesn’t she pick it up herself?" Hyo steps up behind you, following as you begin your strides down the hallway and toward the spiral staircase leading to the first level.
"She’s packing for a trip." You sigh, "Can’t be bothered to leave her home for a second to pick up her designer dress."
"If you’ll let me speak a bit out of line…" Hyo trails off, her words pitching upward in a half-question.
"Yes, of course." You answer quickly. "We’re friends."
"...Your mother is quite the character." Your bodyguard asserts while digging out her phone from her pocket. She unlocks it while staying behind you and out of your line of sight, opening the picture she took of your jewelry box and sending it to Lusher.
She quickly types out, “Here it is,” with the picture attached to the message.
Seconds later, a gray bubble pops up, and Lusher responds. "Great, thanks!"
Hyo hastily sends another message, “We’d better get the ring ASAP. She’s been acting sad since yesterday…”
This time Lusher takes a few more minutes to respond, "Got it. Also, make sure to bring her to the right stores. Boss and I will be right behind you, so make sure to keep her distracted as much as possible."
Hyo texts back a thumbs-up emoji before closing her phone. 
"Character is an understatement." Your voice makes Hyo straighten up immediately.
"That’s the kindest way of expressing what I think about your mother. You are my boss, after all." Hyo points out, shoving her hands into her pockets causally.
"I’m not your boss." You say, turning back to glance at her with furrowed eyebrows. "Bada is."
"She’s ‘the Boss,’ but you’re my boss," Hyo explains. "She’s my employer, but my job is to watch over you when she can’t. You’re my superior."
"I don’t like how that sounds." You frown. "Can’t we just consider each other friends rather than deal with the semantics of superiors and subordinates?"
"If that would make you more comfortable." Hyo shrugs. “Anyway, what’s your mother packing for?”
"Her annual trip to Calivigny Island with my father," you sigh.
"Ah, in the Caribbean," your bodyguard whistles. "A private, luxury island that only accommodates fifty guests at a time."
"She usually travels during the summer, but she missed the trip earlier because she and my father were finalizing the deal between Bada and my proposal."
"Tragic," Hyo remarks sarcastically.
"Isn’t it?" you respond, a smile quirking up your lips as you finally reach the stairs and begin heading downwards. You quickly venture down them and out of the Lee mansion while Hyo heads to the garage, taking out your usual black sports car and parking it in front of the perron steps for you. She helps you in, closing the door behind you before pulling out of the driveway of the mansion and heading out of the open gates.
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The doors of Louis Vuitton glitter in the darkening horizon like a beacon of illumination meant to attract wanderers in the chilly night. And like a moth infatuated with the light, you step in front of the doors, your eyebrows creased together.
“I don’t know why I feel so nervous,” you mutter under your breath.
“Hold your head up high, kid.” Hyo grabs the heavy handle of the door, using her strength to crack it open. “You have more power and influence than anyone inside that store.”
You take in a deep breath and nod, stepping into the store, a small draft of warm air caressing you like a friendly hug. Inside, a whirl of earthy perfume paired with notes of vanilla, makes its way to your senses. All the decorations are painted with a yellow and beige light, the bags hanging from shelves are highlighted like jewels.
And like a newly cut diamond, you remain unseen for only a second before the older jewels notice your radiance, their eyes finding yours instantly. Women and men in their most elegant and finest clothing appraise you, their irises barely swooping over you before they widen to impossible sizes. They start to whisper amongst each other, your appearance surprising them and causing their eyes to glitter with excitement.
You stride forward, remembering Hyo’s advice as you approach a saleswoman–who is notably frozen in her spot when she notices you coming toward them–before someone steps in your path.
A man carrying a tray with a single bottle of sparkling water stands in front of you, his eyes glistening under the light, and a friendly smile stretching across his lips. “Would you like a drink?”
“Oh–” you breathe out, surprised. “Yes, thank you very much.” You take the water bottle, and suddenly the man is out of your view, circling around you and grabbing the coat keeping you slightly hot in the already warm store.
“Allow me to hang your coat,” he mumbles, tucking the tray under his arm as he gently uses his gloved hands to pluck the clothing off of you.
You look back at the man with a slightly dazed expression but smile. “Thank you.”
“It’s my pleasure.” He bows in front of you before exchanging a brief nod with Hyo and stepping back.
You gather your bearings quickly and walk up to the saleswoman, slightly clearing your throat as you hear the giddy whispering from the shoppers increase. “I’m here to pick up an order.”
The saleswoman seems to have gathered herself in the time her co-worker had taken your coat and offered you the sparkling water because now she’s standing straight and has a semi-nervous smile strewn across her lips. “Yes, of course. I can take you to a private room if you’d like.” She gestures to a room concealed by a curtain carrying the “LV” logo.
“Oh no, that’s alright,” you wave a hand in dismissal. “I’m just here to pick up an order, I won’t be staying long.”
“Please, it might take a while for us to find the order.” The saleswoman insists. “You can relax and enjoy some refreshments while we fetch it.”
You glance at Hyo from your peripheral, who looks like she’s trying her hardest to hold in a laugh. Internally rolling your eyes at her, you nod at the saleswoman. “Alright. Thank you.”
“This way, please,” she guides you toward the secluded room, holding back the curtains for you and Hyo to step in.
Inside, there is a glass coffee table, a large ceramic vase sitting at the center of it with white club chairs circling it. Behind, there is a lit wall with water beading down it, and a large mirror across from it.
You move to sit in the chair, but Hyo’s fast, pulling out your seat for you, an amused smile still stretched on her lips. You give her a light glare but mumble a “thank you” nonetheless.
The saleswoman, who’d stepped out for a second without you even realizing it, emerges again, though this time she’s carrying a golden tray like the man from before with refreshments and towels.
“Would you like a hot towel?” She holds it out for you using prongs.
“Sure.” You say hesitantly, grabbing the towel and feeling its warmth awaken your (somehow still) cold fingers.
The woman sets down the tray on the coffee table, presenting you with small cakes and snacks. “Please, take whatever you’d like, and let me know if you need anything else.”
You nod back, glancing at the delicious slices of cake with an edacious stare.
“And what name would your order be under?” The saleswoman asks.
You mutter your mother’s name, and the worker quickly nods, bows, then leaves the room. The second she’s out of sight, you hear a chuckle come from behind you, causing you to whip your head around with a glare.
Hyo covers her mouth with her hand, as she laughs.
“You’re evil, you know that?” You huff.
“Sorry, it’s really just so funny.” Hyo can’t hold back her laughter anymore, essentially all-out laughing at you. “You looked like a deer in headlights.”
“Because I was!” You exclaim. “I just wanted to pick up my mother’s order; why are they doing all this?” You gesture to the room in front of you.
“I told you,” Hyo briefly takes off her sunglasses to wipe away the small tears of laughter from the corner of her eyes. “You have more power than anyone in here. Of course they’re going to be kiss-ups.”
You sigh loudly, sitting back in your chair. “One order, that’s all I wanted… now I feel like they’re going to make me stay longer.”
“I wouldn’t be surprised.” Hyo agrees. “Just say in the nicest way possible that you want to leave, and they’ll let you.”
“You know, the least you could do is help me out.” You scoff lightheartedly. “I’m still new to this stuff.”
“I could do that…” Hyo nods while trailing off. “Or I could watch you struggle. It’s much funnier.” She bursts into a small chuckle at the end of the sentence.
“I hate you.” You groan.
“Oh come on, lighten up.” Hyo finally stops laughing, but her smile never leaves her. “Why don’t you try some of the snacks she gave you?”
You perk up at the thought, casting your eyes back on the tea cakes and tiny, but expensive-looking foods. You pick up what looks like a small slice of strawberry shortcake and eat it, the creamy filling and delicious jam making you smile widely. When you finish chewing–it takes less than a minute–you hold up the tray for Hyo to see. “Do you want some?”
“Nah, I’m good.” She shakes her head.
You move to place the tray down before she suddenly speaks again.
“Wait. Is there any chocolate cake…?”
Your trip to Louis Vuitton ended up yielding many revelations. Number one, Louis Vuitton has to be the worst case of sucking up that you’ve ever seen or experienced, and number two, Hyo is absolutely obsessed with anything chocolate flavored.
“How many free products do you think are in those bags?” You turn to look back at Hyo, who’s juggling three large Louis Vuitton bags in her arms–one of them your mother’s order and the rest filled with gifts–while trying to take a bite of the chocolate decorations she’d taken off of a cake.
“Too many to count.” She says, voice slightly muffled by the food in her mouth.
You laugh before turning back and walking down the sidewalk, passing by other high-end stores. You continue walking for a long stretch until you register the sound of heavy footsteps not too far away from you. You furrow your eyebrows; Hyo never walks with a heavy step.
You pause, “Hyo, what’s that sound?”
“What sound?” Hyo stops as well.
“Footsteps…” you trail off, looking from your left to your right, then behind. You don’t see anyone else trailing after you, your confusion doubling. Perhaps it was just your paranoia manifesting into phantom noises.
Hyo immediately snaps into professional mode, looking back as well. She reaches under her suit and feels for her gun holster, stepping forward. “Stay back a little, I’m going to check it out.” She advances quickly, her eyes scanning the area with calculating expertise.
When she reaches the corner of a store and an alleyway, she quickly turns into it, her gun held up.
Through the darkness of the night, Hyo is just barely able to make out the shocked faces of her Boss, and Lusher crouched next to the side of the building. “Boss?” Hyo whispers loudly, looking between Bada and Lusher.
“What are you doing?” Lusher whisper-yells back. “You’re supposed to be taking unnie into a jewelry store!”
“I would be if you weren’t stomping your feet behind us so loudly!” Hyo shoots back, lightly glaring at her friend.
“Yah, I told you to be quieter.” Bada scolds Lusher, nudging her arm. “You walk like you’re carrying one hundred pounds of extra weight.”
“Why are you two ganging up on me?” Lusher whines. “I’ll try to be more quiet–”
“Hyo?” Your voice breaks through the chilly night air, causing the three women to stiffen up. “Is everything alright?”
“Yup, yes!” Hyo steps out of the alleyway with a forced smile, giving you a thumbs-up. “Everything’s perfect! It was just some drunk stumbling around.”
You give Hyo a hesitant look before nodding and turning to stare at the passersby across the street.
She quickly ducks back into the alleyway, tucking her gun back into its holster. “Lusher, if you want to keep following us, either lighten your step or stay farther back.”
“Okay, I will.” Lusher pouts, receiving another nudge from Bada.
Your fiancée looks Hyo up and down, noticing the Louis Vuitton bags hanging from her arms. “You’re carrying her bags. Good.”
Hyo smiles widely. “Thanks, Boss.”
“Did the trip go smoothly?”
“Yes, she was a bit out of her depth at first, but she handled all the attention well,” Hyo reports back like a proud sister.
Bada smiles to herself, thinking about you awkwardly speaking to the workers in the Louis Vuitton store, not used to being attended to like a high-ranking socialite. Everything you do is endearing to her–she only wishes she was there to see you sparkling amongst snobbish shoppers. “That’s my girl.” She whispers to herself.
Hyo and Lusher barely catch what Bada said, but in response, they both look at each other knowingly and smile.
“Alright, don’t keep her waiting.” Bada cuts in, shifting her demeanor back to cold. “And make sure she stays warm.”
“Yes, Boss.” Hyo nods then steps out of the alleyway, approaching you with fast strides. “Sorry, I took so long.”
“It’s alright.” You shrug. “I was just doing some people-watching while I waited.”
“Right, well, the car is this way.” Hyo motions forward, only briefly glancing back to see Lusher and Bada’s head peeking out from the corner of the store.
You walk forward without a second thought, your head up in the clouds as you take in the beautiful starry sky, and the cloud of perspiration released when you exhale into the icy air. You walk in silence for the length of a block before Hyo breaks the silence.
“Oh, look, a jewelry store.” She tries to say casually as she stops right in front of it. “All of the pieces are beautiful.”
You pause where you stand, turning to face the store, a pit in your stomach growing. Your bodyguard is right, all the jewelry is beautiful. From teardrop diamond earrings to pearl necklaces and dainty bracelets.
But all you can look at are the rings.
The sign above them reads, “Two hearts, one love, forever in your ring.” You turn away from the store, a lump in your throat and a frown on your lips. Clearing your throat, you mumble. “Should we keep walking toward the car?”
Hyo glances to her right again, seeing Bada and Lusher motioning frantically at her to get you to go inside. “Uhhm, don’t you want to look at the pretty jewelry? Maybe pick something up for yourself?” She suggests.
“No–” You begin, but are cut off by a loud sound.
“Ow!” Lusher’s voice rings from behind the store, her hand rubbing at her foot. “You stepped on me–”
Bada slaps her hand over Lusher’s mouth, her eyes wide and her pointer finger coming up to make a “shush” motion. Lusher immediately calms down, suddenly realizing her mistake and wearing a mortified expression.
“What was that?” You take a step forward, about to head toward the sound before Hyo stands in your way.
“Probably just another drunk.” She says quickly. “No need to worry.”
You try to look over her shoulder, but she carefully pushes you forward and in the direction of the jewelry store. “Okay…”
“Well why don’t we go inside the jewelry store–”
“Actually, can we go home?” You ask, avoiding eye contact with the store and stepping back.
Hyo’s smile starts to twitch. “Come on, maybe just a peek–”
“Please.” You interrupt quietly, looking down at the floor.
Hyo sees out of her peripheral that Bada’s shaking her head and frowning, so she sighs and nods. “Alright, let’s go home.”
You turn and walk away quickly, eager to escape the thoughts plaguing your mind. Your bodyguard follows after you, having failed her mission terribly. Behind you, both Lusher and Bada step onto the sidewalk, the subordinate clutching her head in distress.
“She didn’t even look at the rings!” Lusher exclaims, deflated and looking dejected.
Bada remains quiet, watching you walk down the street, the wind whipping her coat around. “Something’s wrong.”
“Yeah, clearly! We’ll never find a ring for her at this rate,” Lusher says, expressing her frustration.
“No, I mean,” Bada pauses, placing her hand over the right side of her chest. “My heart. It hurts when I see her sad.”
Lusher stops whining, facing her boss with a caring expression. “What does it feel like?”
“It feels like I’m getting stabbed,” Bada admits, her face scrunching up in confusion and pain. “I want to rip my heart out and give it to her. I want to do everything in my power to make her smile when she frowns like that.”
Lusher lets out a deep sigh, sympathizing with her friend. “Oh, Bada…”
“I felt like this when she was taken by Seong,” Bada whispers. “But back then, I thought it was because I was worried about bringing her home safe.” She turns to face her subordinate, clutching her chest tightly. “Why do I feel like this?”
Lusher smiles sadly at her friend. “You’re in love.”
“...In love?”
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Love was not the answer, she concluded. No, love could never be the answer. Since you first arrived at her home, Bada made it clear to you that she’d never fall in love with you. So the mental and emotional anguish she’s been feeling for the past few days must have been due to the stress of her work… right?
Either way, whether it was unconsciously or consciously at first, Bada started to avoid you. She found that seeing you less would make the stabbing pain in her heart subside, and even if it didn’t fully fade away, throwing herself into her work was a perfect distraction.
But it wasn’t easy. Obviously, you began to notice that your already few-and-far-between visits from Bada became essentially nonexistent. So naturally, you started to make an effort to see her. You tried to bring her breakfast in the morning like you had during your first month in the Lee mansion but hit a wall.
“The Boss will be taking her breakfast alone from now on,” Lusher informs you, trying to hold back her frown when she sees the excitement in your eyes dim, and how you practically wilt.
“How long?” You whisper.
“For the foreseeable future,” Lusher says through gritted teeth. It’s taking everything in her to not just let you into Bada’s office. But at the end of the day, nothing is stronger than Bebe’s loyalty.
“Oh,” you take a step back, trying to wear a friendly smile but failing. “I’ll come see her later, then.”
Lusher hesitates. “Not to speak out of line, unnie…”
You perk up, looking into her eyes.
“But I think it’s best for your emotional state if you keep your distance,” she advises you, her tone gentle and full of care.
But of course, being the determined and stubborn woman you are, you don’t heed Lusher’s words… to your detriment.
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After days of only traveling between her office and her bedroom, Bada finally emerges from her work, having signed and looked over all the documents she’d been given for the week. In her desperation for a change in scenery, she left her office, completely forgetting why she’d been hiding away in the first place.
“Bada!” You call from behind her, a smile stretching across your lips.
The sound of your voice makes Bada freeze. The pain in her heart spikes, and a wave of regret flows through her. She doesn’t respond to you but stays rooted in her spot.
You run to your fiancée’s side, making quick eye contact with her. But the look she wears surprises you. Her dark brown, almost gray irises stare back at you like an impenetrable stone wall, hiding away any emotion she may be feeling.
For the first time in her life, Bada feels like she’s able to successfully hide her emotions. Because hearing your voice and seeing you makes every fiber of her body come to life. Perhaps it's because it’s been so long since she’s seen you.
The days she’d spent locked inside her office or bedroom made the sight of you even more irresistible. Your eyes, which she hadn’t met in what felt like decades shine under the light with an endearing gleam. Your body, which she hadn’t touched makes her fingers twitch, every digit aching to caress any and all of your flesh. Your lips…
Bada has to use all her willpower to stop herself from wrapping her arms around you and kissing you. The yearning her body has to embrace you and touch you drives her mad.
“Lusher was right.” Is all she can think.
…The realization disgusts her.
How could she be so selfish? How could she fall in love with you knowing full well all the torment and danger her feelings will bring you? How could she allow herself to fall victim to your every smile and caring saccharine phrases? How could she when she knows that she may end up laying in the street, sobbing, holding your cold body in her arms while you stare up at her, the light gone from your eyes, and crimson falling from your chest?
Your smile starts to slowly wither, a slightly timid expression encompassing your face. “Bada?” You mumble. “You finally came out of your office.”
A deathly silence echoes in the hallway, not a sound leaving Bada’s lips. She only moves her gaze away from you, instead staring straight in front of her.
“Uhm, I was going to ask you if we could maybe spend some time together?” Your voice comes out low, nervous, and like you’re unsure of yourself.
Again, that nasty tugging on Bada’s heart hits her, but this time she reacts to it by closing her eyes and breathing out through her nose. For her, it’s a method of calming herself down.
But to you, it relays a sense of annoyance you assume she’s feeling.
Once again she doesn’t answer you, making you shift uncomfortably in your spot. You stare at her with pleading eyes, begging her to say anything to you. Even just letting you know that she’s listening to you, and not acting like you’re a pesky fly on the wall, buzzing in her ear.
“I have work to do.” Finally, when she speaks, her tone is clipped, and full of ice.
You physically react, your limbs shaking at her phantom frost. Before you can even open your mouth again, Bada turns and walks in the opposite direction towards her office.
You’re left in the hallway, stunned and wondering if Bada was aware of the trail of heartbreak she’d left in her wake.
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And yet despite everything, you keep trying to get through to Bada.
You try because you care. You try because no matter how hard you remind yourself that your union to her was just business, you can’t stop yourself from falling in love with her.
She saved you from your parents, after all. She gave you a home that you could call yours–she introduced you to the Bebe girls, who you now considered your close friends. She brought you into a world of glitz and glamor, while still protecting you and watching over you with the utmost care.
How could you not fall in love with her?
So, with a world of fluttering butterflies nesting in the depths of your stomach, you take in a deep breath and knock on her office door. When you pull your fist away from the wood, you’re met with an uncomfortable silence. Swaying nervously, you play with your fingers, waiting another minute before mustering the courage to knock again.
This time, a small sound emanates from inside, perhaps a loud inhalation or the sound of an annoyed breath. Your stomach turns at the thought.
When you withdraw your fist from the wood, an uncomfortable silence engulfs the space. Swaying nervously, you toy with your fingers, mustering the courage to knock again after waiting another minute.
This time, a faint sound emanates from within, perhaps a pronounced inhalation or an exasperated breath. Your stomach churns at the notion.
"Who is it?" Bada's frosty voice compels you to stand tall, the butterflies in your belly fluttering wildly, creating a tempest.
“It’s me,” you speak cautiously.
For what feels like the millionth time, a hush falls between you and Bada.
“...I’m busy,” is all she utters in response.
You close your eyes and gulp, uncertain of your next move. On one hand, you don’t want to disturb Bada, especially when she sounds visibly irritated. On the other hand, the yearning to see your fiancée again is overpowering. Being separated from her renders the hallways of the Lee mansion colder, your life dimmer, and the world slower in its spin.
“Bada…” you trail off, your voice low and caring. “I haven’t spoken to you properly in days.”
This time, there's little dead air before a chair scrapes against the floor, and her footsteps approach the door. Surprised, you take a step back just before she opens the door, keeping it ajar so you can see her but not enter her office.
“I told you, I’m busy,” she says plainly, her gaze avoiding yours.
Your eyebrows furrow as you try to meet her eyes. “You should take a break; you've been working nonstop for days now.”
“I have to,” Bada defends her actions.
“I understand that,” you nod slowly, acknowledging the stress she must be under. “But it’s not good for your health.”
Truthfully, you didn’t want to say it aloud, but Bada looks exhausted. Bags and dark circles under her eyes, absent before, now paint a picture of fatigue. Moreover, the expression she wears hints at an imminent collapse.
“You should take a nap, or if you really don’t want to rest, we can relax and watch this drama together–” you start to grow excited at the idea, a smile forming on your lips.
Meanwhile, Bada confronts a dilemma. She acknowledges her love for you, plain and simple. She wants to eschew work, opting to watch a drama with you, to hold you close and sleep with the comforting weight of your presence. Yet, her mind brands her feelings as selfish, a slow-acting poison disguised in sweet wine—pleasurable until it brings forth your demise.
“You expect too much of me,” Bada says through gritted teeth, spitting the words out with venom that extinguishes the small smile you’d nurtured.
“What?” You breathe, confusion clouding your expression.
“You ask me to spend time with you, you want us to watch a drama together,” she lists. “These affections you are asking of me–” She cuts herself off, shaking her head with a bored expression. “It is inappropriate. We are not a couple.”
In just a few words, Bada annihilates your world. The meticulously crafted memories of your time with your fiancée crumble, collapsing under the weight of her words. "We are not a couple." The phrase echoes in your mind, torturing you until your ears ring.
You visibly flounder, opening and closing your mouth in genuine shock. “Where is this coming from?” You ask incredulously.
“I told you I would not fall in love with you,” Bada argues. “Our union was a tactical business move that benefitted me and your parents, that is all. You are nothing more to me.”
As if your heart could shatter further, it bleeds in your chest, oozes crimson red, and cries out to be spared. For a brief moment, you're left so shell-shocked that you almost lose all sense of self. Rooted in your spot, you stare into Bada’s eyes as every part of your body pulsates with insurmountable pain.
“We don’t act like we’re in a marriage of convenience,” you fight back, words a hushed and hurt whisper.
She doesn’t respond, simply looks ahead, acknowledging the truth. She hasn’t treated you as a friend for months, let alone an acquaintance for longer.
“Bada. Look at me,” you order, your voice gaining slight confidence.
Slowly, Bada shifts her gaze to meet yours. In her dark brown irises, a storm rages—a tempest of unspoken feelings concealed behind a sheet of ice. Staring into Bada’s eyes, you shake your head with a hurt expression. The woman in front of you is unrecognizable. She doesn’t resemble your fiancée and the woman you fell in love with; she's a shadow, an imitation.
"Who are you?" Your eyes question Bada.
“I don’t know,” her eyes confess.
You take a step back from Bada, tears welling in your eyes. “You are cruel, Bada Lee.” Without uttering another word, you turn and rush away, almost colliding with Lusher, standing around the corner with Tatter by her side.
Lusher watches you leave with a disapproving look. She glances at Bada, who stands stock-still, appearing as if she’d been stabbed in the heart.
Her boss makes eye contact with her. “What? Aren’t you going to tell me off?” Bada says harshly.
Lusher only shakes her head disapprovingly, looking away from her friend.
Bada scoffs, clicking her tongue as she brushes past Lusher and Tatter, heading toward the stairs and the door to the Lee mansion.
Tatter takes a step forward, a worried look on her face. “Shouldn’t we go after them?”
Lusher holds her arm out to stop Tatter from walking ahead. “It isn’t our place,” she says softly. “It’s time for Bada to face her past.”
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Blown glass casts colored shadows across Bada’s fair skin. Her grim expression contrasts with the bright colors, and the bouquet of sunflowers clutched between her fingers adds a touch of vibrancy. In front of her, a gold placard engraved with her mother’s name stares back at her.
“Hello, mother,” Bada murmurs into the open air. “I’m sorry; it’s been a while since I’ve visited you. I’ve been busy.” She shifts her gaze to the floor. “I met a woman.” She utters your name with reverence, “You would have loved her.”
She closes her eyes, envisioning your lively and beautiful countenance.
“You’ll be surprised to hear that I'm engaged to her now. We are to be wed in December.”
“You are cruel, Bada Lee.” Her mind echoes your words, and she opens her eyes.
“Well, perhaps not anymore,” Bada steps forward, exchanging the wilting flowers beside her mother’s grave with a new bouquet. The bright yellow sunflowers pop next to the gold, infusing the room with more color. “She made me feel strange emotions,” Bada confesses.
She thinks back to the first time she had a proper conversation with you. You’d come into her office and brought her breakfast, standing tall and confident as you poked and prodded, asking questions about her.
“When she’s happy, I’m at peace,” Bada reflects. Her thoughts then shift to Seong. “When she was taken from me, I was infuriated.” Her fingers unconsciously curl into a fist. She places her hand over her heart, feeling it beat wildly against her palm.
Her heart sings for you, no matter where she might be.
“But I know better.” Bada shakes her head. “I know better than to let myself care about her.” She thinks of the way she’d spoken to you an hour prior–how she’d lied to you– “So I hurt her.” She says, her voice low and full of shame. “I said whatever I could think of to make her hate me.”
Outside, the wind whips violently, thrumming against the mausoleum.
“...Because loving me is a death wish.”
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13 years ago 
A bright-eyed, 15-year-old Bada Lee steps out of her private school, her eyes scanning the myriad of luxury cars to find a silver Ferrari LaFerrari, the hypercar her bodyguard drives. Suddenly, the sound of a loud engine pulls up next to the curb of the school, right in front of where Bada stands.
“Ms. Lee.” Chung-Hee steps out of the car, a pair of black sunglasses covering his eyes. “Are you ready to go home?”
“Yes!” Bada nods excitedly, heading toward Chung-Hee. He quickly moves to grab her backpack before opening the car door, the silver sides of the car shooting up into the air like wings. “Thank you,” Bada says as she piles in, a wide smile on her face.
Chung-Hee simply nods as he sets her backpack in the front passenger seat before sitting in the driver’s spot. He pulls out of the driving lot with ease, heading away from the school. “How was your day today, Ms. Lee?”
“Very good.” Bada nods. “Actually, I was talking to some of my friends…”
“Seoyoung Lee, right?”
“Yes.” Bada smiles. “She and some others were talking about taking some dance classes after school–”
“Ms. Lee…” Chung-Hee sighs. “You are already very busy with your English and piano lessons, not to mention horseback riding and taekwondo–”
“I know that, Chung.” Bada huffs endearingly. “But this is something I really want to do, not just another hobby my father makes me take up so that I can find a husband.”
Chung-Hee lightly drums his fingers against the wheel. “You’ll have to ask both your father and your mother–”
“Yes, I know that.” Bada makes a cheeky expression. “That is why I’m going to speak to my mother right when we arrive home so that she can convince my father.”
“Ah, your mother is not currently home,” Chung-Hee informs her. “She is buying groceries for dinner tonight.”
“Then will you take me to her, please?” Bada begs, pitching her tone upwards.
“I was instructed to take you straight home–”
“Pleaseeee Chung?” Bada continues, staring through the rearview mirror so that her bodyguard can see her properly.
Chung-Hee sighs in defeat. “One of these days you’re going to get me fired.”
Bada squeals in excitement, practically bouncing in her seat. “You know that’s not true. My father considers you a close friend.”
“I guess I am lucky in that regard.” Chung-Hee breathes.
“Well, anyway…” Bada sits back, her smile never dimming. “How is your daughter, Chung?”
Immediately, Chung-Hee sits up in his seat, a bright grin overtaking his lips. “She’s great, thank you for asking. And she’s doing wonderfully in school.”
“You must be proud of her then.”
“Yes, I am,” Chung-Hee says fondly. “She’s so intelligent, it blows my mind.”
Bada smiles sadly as she nods.
“And she looks up to me. Says she wants to be just like me when she’s older.”
“She sounds wonderful, Chung,” Bada whispers.
The rest of the car ride continues in a comfortable silence, although Bada shifts her gaze to stare out of the window. She counts every passing minute, becoming more and more restless to see her mother.
Finally, the car eventually slows down across the street from a grocery store. Bada starts to grin, practically buzzing in her seat. Sensing her excitement, Chung-Hee parks the car and quickly exits, opening the door, only for Bada to practically shoot out of the car and rush over to the grocery store.
Chung-Hee only sighs. “Yah, one day she really is going to get me fired.”
Inside the grocery store, Bada barely pays attention to the way the shoppers gape at her, only intent on finding her mother. She uses her long legs to quickly make her way through the aisles until she spots a familiar head of hair near the fresh produce. Bada makes her way over to her mother, calling out to her.
“Mother!” She says, only a few feet away.
Bada’s mother immediately turns around, her eyebrows furrowed in confusion until she spots her daughter rushing toward her. “Bada?” She responds, a smile growing on her lips. “What are you doing here?”
Bada stops right in front of her mother, throwing her arms around her in a hug that the older woman immediately reciprocates. “Chung-Hee told me you weren’t home, so I asked him to drive me here.”
“And where is he now?” Bada’s mother scans the store, searching for a tall man wearing sunglasses.
“Oh…” Bada unwarps herself from her mother and then turns to look behind her, only now noticing her bodyguard is nowhere to be seen. “I must have left him behind.”
Her mother sighs and shakes her head disapprovingly. “Where are your manners, Bada? You have that poor man running after you all day.”
“Sorry,” Bada mumbles out half-sincerely. Her mother glances at her before gently patting her back, prompting her to continue walking. “Are you done shopping?”
“Yes, I have everything I need to make dinner tonight.” Her mother smiles.
“Why do you come to grocery stores anyway?” Bada asks. “The staff bring in fresh ingredients and foods every day.”
“They do, and while I appreciate all they do for us,” her mother walks over to the cash register, placing her groceries on the counter. “It’s important to never become lazy. As your mother and the woman of the house, it’s my responsibility to prepare you and your father’s dinner, even occasionally.”
Bada listens to her mother’s words carefully, nodding along in agreement. She watches her mother hand over a heavy golden credit card to the cashier, who is about to refuse the payment, but her mother’s bright smile and persistence makes him give in and take the card, charging her for the food.
“Besides, the staff deserve to rest every once and a while, don’t you think?” Bada’s mother continues.
“Yeah.” Bada remains in awe of her mother’s humility and kindness.
“What made you so eager to see me that you came all the way here, by the way?” She asks her daughter, helping the worker bag her groceries, despite his insistence that he should do it himself.
“Ah,” Bada suddenly smiles nervously, grabbing two of the heaviest bags to help her mother carry out of the grocery store. “Do you remember my friend Seoyoung?”
“Of course I do, she’s your oldest friend, isn’t she?”
Bada nods. “Well she and some of my other friends wanted to take some dance classes after school, and maybe join a dance club afterward–”
“I see.” Her mother nods. “So you came to ask me to convince your father to let you, is that right?”
Bada stares at her mother with a sheepish expression. “Yes.”
“I don’t know, Bada. Won’t you be much too tired after school? And don’t forget you have piano lessons right after–”
“I promise I can handle it.” She says with conviction. “I’ll do all my lessons and taekwondo every day even after dance.”
“You’ll be exhausted–”
“I won't,” Bada argues with a small pout. “Please, mother: I think dance is something I could be very good at.”
The older woman pauses, turning to look into her daughter’s eyes. She sees them shine with confidence and pure hope, which makes her smile. “Okay,” she nods. “I’ll speak to your father about it.”
“Yes!” Bada cheers, side-hugging her mother the best she can with her hands preoccupied. “Thank you, thank you, thank you!”
The older woman laughs, leaning into her daughter’s side. “Of course. If dancing is something you think you’ll enjoy, then I fully support you trying it out.”
That evening, under the warm Seoul sun, Bada experiences her last moments of pure happiness, unencumbered by worries or fear. She simply laughs with her mother, her heart bursting at the seams with love for the woman who cared for and nurtured her.
Her happiness blinds her to the moving figure across the street.
Ji-ah, Bada’s mother’s bodyguard has his head down as he crosses the street. Her mother smiles at him, greeting him again with a wave. But her eyes catch something, a glint of silver clutched in his right hand and almost completely concealed from her by his suit jacket. Her smile fades, confusion stretching across her face until she spots another man peering from the corner of a building, a nasty smirk on his face.
A blur of motion crosses Bada’s eyes before a loud popping sound fills the air.
The neighborhood falls into silence after, Bada jolting at the noise in shock. She looks around the street blearily, her mind still trying to catch up as her ears ring.
“Mo–” Before Bada can call out to her, the body of her mother falls into hers. They collapse in the street, grocery bags broken and food spilling out onto the concrete as Bada lets out a small huff of pain and surprise. She looks down, finding her mother splayed across her lap, a gunshot wound in her chest. “M-Mother?” Bada stutters in shock, her eyes growing wide in horror as she wraps her arms around her mother’s body.
In her daughter’s lap, Mrs. Lee breathes heavily, her eyes glazing over as pools of crimson fall from her chest, staining Bada’s hands bright red.
“No, no, no.” Bada breathes, placing her hand against her mother’s wound. “Ma… ma please stay awake.” She pleads, tears beginning to fall from her eyes as her heart pounds in her chest, a stabbing pain puncturing the organ. 
“Are you hurt?” Her mother barely manages to choke out, raising her pale hand to clutch the side of her daughter’s face.
“No.” Bada shakes her head, now fully sobbing.
A few feet away, Chung-Hee finally arrivies near the grocery store, having been held back by a group of men. He recognised them to be lackeys of a rival of Mr. Lee, and swung before they got the jump on him. He managed to beat them all to a pulp before rushing down the street, his mind racing with thoughts of Mrs. Lee and Bada being in potential danger.
Before he could make it to them he spots Ji-ah brandishing a gun, and holding it up in their direction. He fires without a second thought, hitting Mrs. Lee. 
Chung-Hee pulls out his gun quickly, shooting at Ji-ah across the street. He manages to hit him in the chest, then quickly fires again, emptying five more rounds into the traitor before Ji-ah falls to the concrete, dead.
Bada, unable to focus on the chaos around her only stares at her mother while sobbing, rocking back and forth. “Umma,” she cries, “Umma please, stay awake!”
Mrs. Lee only smiles, brushing her thumb against her daughter’s cheek. “You are beautiful.” She utters, her eyes filled with pure love and adoration. “I could not have asked for a kinder, gentler daughter.”
“Umma,” Bada closes her eyes, shaking her head as her tears grow hot, their salty liquid burning her cheeks.
“I love you.” Mrs. Lee whispers.
With the last of her strength gone, her eyes glaze over and her hand falls away from Bada’s cheek, hitting the concrete with a thud.
“No, umma!” Bada practically screams, clutching her mother’s body close to her chest as her frame starts to physically shake. “I love you too, please don’t leave me! Please, umma!”
Chung-Hee rushes over to Bada’s side, trying to separate her from her mother’s dead body. Bada only shoves him away, her eyes full of pure sorrow.
The sound of fast-approaching cars–her father’s men– just barely registers in Bada’s mind, reminding her of the shooter.
Bada shifts her gaze to the dead body across the street, her eyes going ice-cold at the sight of Ji-ah sprawled across the concrete.
Poison.
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“Would you hate me for what I’ve done?” Bada speaks to her mother’s headstone. “For pushing her away?”
The wind thrashes against the windows.
“Because I do.” Bada admits.
The sunflowers next to her mother’s headstone quiver withthe breeze.
“I don’t know what to do with myself.” Bada places her hands over her eyes, feeling tears build inside them. “I should be happy that she hates me. I should be happy that she’ll stay away from me and be safe, but–”
The tears she’s been holding in finally break through. For what feels like the first time in 13 years, Bada Lee cries.
“I hate myself. I want to tear myself apart for all the things I said to her.” She confesses, sobbing. “I love her. I love her more than anything.”
The sunflowers shake.
“I want to be with her. I want to tell her that I love her. I want to spend the rest of my life with her.” Bada’s heart races in her chest as she heaves. She tears her hands away from her face so she can see her mother’s headstone. “I wish you were here to guide me–to tell me what to do–”
Suddenly, the violent winds from outside cause the door to the mausoleum to whip open, the strong breeze blows past Bada, swiping the tears from her cheeks and rushing toward the sunflowers. The sheer force of the wind sends flower petals into the air, making Bada stare up at them in shock.
Then, a memory comes rushing back to the forefront of her mind.
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22 years ago
Six year old Bada races through the garden next to her father’s office, giggling at the small birds nesting in a tree above her. She tries to reach for them–but although being very tall for her age–she can’t touch the branch they reside on.
Bada tries to stretch her legs even further, standing on her tippytoes as she reaches her arms up–but she immediately loses her balance, making her wobble until she falls back.
Unfortunately, Bada’s excitement made her blind to the fact that just behind her lied a bushel of roses, their thorns giving her a painful greeting as her back and arms get caught on the spikes.
“Ouch!” She hisses, quickly removing herself from the flowers. She now has a few cuts and scrapes littering her arms, which makes tears rush to her eyes. She starts to sniffle, about to begin crying–
“Bada.” The sound of her mom’s voice distracts her, making the young girl look up.
“Umma.” Bada says tearrily.
“What happened?” Mrs. Lee rushes over to her daughter’s side, her eyes filled with worry as they take in the small cuts all over her arms.
“I fell into the–the thorns.” Bada hiccups, pointing at the offending flowers.
“Bada, I told you not to play near the roses.” Her mother softly scolds her, gently picking her daughter up and placing her in her lap.
“I’m sorry umma.” Bada sniffles, wiping her tears away with the palm of her hands.
“It’s alright, sweetheart.” Mrs. Lee looks over her daughter’s injuries. “Thankfull, none of the cuts are too deep, but I’ll clean them–”
Bada, now much less emotional, shifts her attention away from her mother, instead staring up to find the birds in the tree above them. They rub their beaks and heads against each other, their eyes closed as they rest in their nest.
“Umma.” Bada suddenly interrupts her mother.
Mrs. Lee pauses, noticing her daughter is looking upward, and glances up as well. “Yes?”
“What does being in love feel like?”
Her mother looks down at her in surprise, a small smile growing on her lips. “Why do you ask?”
Bada looks away from the birds and at her feet instead. “Some of my friends were talking about love because Valentine’s Day is coming up. They said we should give chocolates to boys we love.”
Mrs. Lee’s smile widens, “Ah, I see.”
“But I don’t feel anything when I think about the boys in my class.” Bada mumbles. “So I want to know what I should be feeling.”
Mrs. Lee caresses the top of her daughter’s hair, completely endeared by the young girl. “You’re still young, Bada. You might not feel such strong emotions yet.”
Bada looks up at her mother, her eyes wide and pleading.
Mrs. Lee sighs, then nods. “Alright.” She moves her daughter around in her lap so she’s facing her. “When you’re in love, all you can think about is your partner. You wake up in the morning and your mind instantly goes to them. ‘What are they doing right now?’ ‘Have they eaten breakfast yet?’ ‘Did they sleep well?’” Bada’s mother mumbles. “When you’re with them, you smile very wide.” She reaches over to pinch her daughter’s cheeks, stretching her lips into a smile. Young Bada giggles at the action, her lips easily forming a grin.
Her mother laughs along with her, removing her hands from her daughter’s cheeks.
“And when you’re away from them, you’re very sad.” She makes a small frown, which Bada mimics cutely. “You want to be with them every waking moment.”
Bada glances down at her lap, her eyebrows furrowing. “And what if I can’t tell if I’m in love or not?”
“Oh, you’ll know.” Mrs. Lee nods.
“How?” Bada pouts.
Her mother thinks for a moment before smiling. She grabs her daughter’s arms and slowly starts to place kisses on her small cuts. Bada looks at her mother in surprise, a few giggles slipping from her lips at the action.
“You'll realize you're in love when you see your partner hurt, and all you want to do is make them feel better,” her mother mumbles. “You wish you had magical powers to heal all their wounds–” She places a kiss on Bada’s last cut. “So, you end up kissing every injury to help them heal.”
Bada breathes in wonder, her eyes glittering under the sunlight. “Is that why appa always gives you a kiss when you get hurt?”
“Yes.” Mrs. Lee nods, grinning widely. “He helps me get better, and it’s his way of telling me he loves me.”
“But what if one day you get really hurt, and appa isn’t there to give you a kiss?” Bada asks. “Will you not heal?”
“In that case, I’ll have to be strong and get better on my own.” Her mother whispers softly. “Although I wish I could, I can’t always rely on your father to take care of me. I need to be independent as well.”
“I think I know what it means to be in love now.” Bada smiles. “I’m excited to fall in love!”
Mrs. Lee laughs warmly. “That’s good, sweetheart. You should be very excited to find someone who will also kiss your wounds.” Together, mother and daughter sit in the garden, their heads and hearts filled with love. 
A strong breeze suddenly whips around them, plucking a few sunflower petals from the bushel next to the roses. They dance and flutter in the air, making both Bada and her mother stare up at them in amazement. 
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As yellow sunflower petals fall onto the mausoleum floor, Bada smiles widely. She closes her eyes and nods. “I understand now, mother.” Opening her eyes, she glances at her mother’s headstone. “I know what I must do.”
She says one final goodbye to the resting place of her mother before racing out of the private cemetery, and toward her Porsche 918 Spyder. She’s about to pull out of the parking lot when her eyes catch a store across the street. She freezes in her spot, mesmerized.
There, on display, a misty gem sat atop a golden band surrounded by small diamonds, with flower-shaped gold holding onto the gem. It’s a unique, but beautiful ring.
“Perfect.” Bada breathes.
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Arriving back at the Lee mansion, a cloud of sorrow and heartbreak fills the halls. Bada winces as she trudges up the stairs, guilt causing her throat to close up. Her feet take a mind of their own, leading her on autopilot to the place where she longs to be most, with you.
Bada stares at the wood of your door, suddenly feeling immensely nervous. She wonders if you’d felt this way when you bravely knocked on her door hours prior.
She raises her fist to knock, her ears just barely picking up the sound of small sniffles behind the door. Her heart screams in her chest.
She waits a few moments with no response before grabbing onto the doorknob, and twisting it open. Bada steps into your room hesitantly, her eyebrows furrowing at what she sees.
You’re sitting in your bed, your hands covering your eyes as you silently weep into them. Lusher sits beside you, rubbing your back soothingly as she tries to calm you. She looks up at the sound of Bada coming in, her eyes moving to Hyo who stands next to the door.
Hyo does nothing, simply glances between you and her boss while gnawing her bottom lip.
Lusher casts her disapproving gaze onto Bada, but her friend quickly shakes her head. Bada steps forward and walks to your side, kneeling next to the bed.
“Hey,” She says to you softly.
You don’t look up at her, only inch closer to Lusher.
Bada closes her eyes and swallows a lump in her throat. “I’m sorry.” She whispers sincerely.
Your cries seem to slowly die down at her words, now becoming small sniffles.
“I’m ready to tell you everything if you’re willing to listen.”
You finally take your hands away from your face to look up at Lusher. She stares back at you and smiles, nodding kindly. You take in a deep breath, “Okay.”
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Sand crunches below you, and the sound of ocean waves whipping against each granule soothes your nerves. The night is cold, which makes you regret wearing the beige, glittery dress you’d chosen. You clutch at your arms, feeling goosebumps rise from your skin.
Bada notices you shivering and takes off her black coat. “Here.” She whispers, draping it over your shoulders and rubbing her slim hands up and down your arms to warm you up.
You stare at Bada, hating how your heart leaps in your chest at her tender care. You want to stew in your anger and hurt, but the way she looks at you with so much warmth and regret makes you melt. You’re weak.
Bada, now in a simple black shirt and brown slacks steps back. “Is that better?”
“Yes.” You mumble, looking at the sand pooling under your feet.
Bada nods, breathing out deeply. “Okay.” She looks incredibly nervous in front of you, and you almost want to soothe her worries. “I’m not sure how to start this…” She trails off. “But I want you to know that I’m sorry.”
You look up from the sand to stare into Bada’s eyes.
“The things I said to you were disgusting lies.” She admits, shame encompassing her expression. “You are more to me than just a business deal. You have been from the start.”
In the background, the ocean waves begin to calm.
“I never told you this, but…” She shakes her head, a ghost of a smile on her lips. “the day that we met, I came to talk to your parents to break off the deal.”
Your eyes go wide, and a look of confusion grows on your expression.
“I’d been having second thoughts about our engagement.” She closes her eyes, remembering that day vividly. “I was going to tell them that I wanted to call it off, but then–” her smile turns soft. “You walked in.”
Suddenly, you no longer feel cold, the heat of Bada’s coat and confession making every part of your body burn.
“And you were so beautiful. Like nothing I’d ever seen. So beautiful, and so smart.” She opens her eyes, taking your hands into hers. “I knew then and there that I had to go along with the deal. That I had to make you mine.”
You squeeze Bada’s hands, tears beginning to flow into your eyes.
“But I was terrified. I was so terrified of my feelings.” She starts to tear up as well. “If I were to let you fall in love with me, I would be putting your life at risk. I told myself I was being selfish.”
You want to cut in and deny everything that she says, but you let her talk.
“When my mother died…” Bada chokes on her words–she has to close her eyes and steady her breathing to continue. “She stepped in front of a bullet for me.”
The tears you’d been trying to hold back release, your heart aching in your chest in sympathy for your fiancée.
“Her bodyguard betrayed us... he was aiming to kill me but–” She takes another deep breath. “My mother took the shot.”
“Oh, Bada…” You whisper, throwing your arms around her to pull her into a hug.
Bada breaks down in the comfort of your arms, sobbing violently, and finally releasing 13 years worth of guilt. You hold onto her the entire time, rubbing her back and whispering sweet nothings into her ears.
"I should've been the one to die that day," she cries. "My parents could have had another child—a son. Someone they could be proud to pass on the business to."
“Bada Lee, you are the most hardworking woman I’ve ever met.” You insist. “Your parents would be so proud of what you’ve made of their business.”
Bada tightens her hold on your waist. “I’m sorry.” She slowly unravels herself from you, wiping her tears as she steels herself. “There’s nothing I want more in this world than to wake up next to you every morning. I want to stay by your side for what little time we may have together.”
You bite your lip, trying to stop your sobs from passing beyond your lips.
Bada takes your hand and suddenly starts walking toward a faint light in the distance of the beach. You give her a confused look but follow her anyway until you finally see what she’s bringing you toward.
Rose petals are scattered on the beach sand to create a makeshift walkway, lanterns with burning candles lighting up the sides of it while a small arch in the shape of a heart lies beyond the petals.
You instantly clasp your hands over your mouth, breathing out in shock and awe, turning to face Bada who only smiles at you. She takes both of your hands once again, then slowly starts to lower herself onto the sand, taking one knee in front of you.
“When I look at you, I see my future in your eyes. I know who I am with you.” She places a kiss on your knuckles. “I am selfish. I am a woman who will devote her every waking moment to caring and protecting you.”
She slips her hand into the pocket of her brown slacks and pulls out a black box. You start to openly sob when she opens it and reveals a beautiful engagement ring.
“So, will you allow me to be a selfish woman, and love you until the end of my days?”
“Yes!”
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A mess of kisses and wandering hands, you and Bada trail into her private beach house. It’s small but cozy and intimate, exactly what you two need.
Bada guides you in the direction of the master bedroom, never separating from your soft lips. She huffs, her hot breaths caressing your skin as she opens the door and walks toward the bed. It’s decorated in even more rose petals that you crush when she lays you down, and hovers on top of you.
“I’ve said some terrible things to you today,” Bada whispers. “So let me make it up to you.” She places her hand over your right breast, squeezing it and making you moan. “Will you let me?” She asks. “Will you let me…make love to you?”
“Yes.” You breathe. “Yes, Bada.”
Bada smiles, closing her eyes in bliss at the way you alluringly say her name. “I love your voice.” She trails her slim fingers down your body before bringing them up again, and carefully helping you peel your shining dress off your body.
You’re left in your panties and your bra, heaving, passionate breaths making your chest rise and fall in quick succession. Bada stares at your breasts unabashedly before dragging her eyes over every inch of your body. She looks in complete and utter awe, taking in a sharp breath.
“I love your body.” She continues, lowering her hands to your panties, slowly pushing them aside. She finds your pussy glistening with slick, her eyes drinking in the sight with fiery irises. Bada parts your lips, watching carefully as strings of wetness cling to them, revealing your pearly, throbbing clit.
As if in a trance, she brings her thumb up to it, rubbing it up and down with varying degrees of pressure, studying how you cry out in pleasure at each motion.
“Do you like that?” She whispers, staring to trial kisses on your neck and breasts.
“Yes.” You immediately respond, losing yourself in the simple pleasure your faincée gives you. All the months of being untouched have made you so sensitive–so, so sensitive to the point that you’re releasing ridiculous amounts of slick onto Bada’s fingers.
“I want to feel you,” Bada confesses, moving her fingers away from your clit and to your hole. She traces her finger around it before gently inserting one in, your pussy sucking her in without any complaint. “Ah,” she breathes, closing her eyes. “You’re so warm.”
You let out a strangled moan at her words, begging her to continue.
She does as you ask, pushing her finger in deep before dragging it out–again and again she does this, slowly building up her pace until she’s driving her finger into you at an incredible speed. “You’re so warm, honey. So wet.” She repeats, stars in her eyes as she moves to kiss you passionately, all tongue and spit.
“More, please.” You ask again.
“Of course.” She whispers against your lips. Bada takes another finger and inserts it into you, the almost painful but pleasurable stretch makes you cry out, grabbing her unoccupied hand to squeeze it. “There you go.” She says fondly. “Make as much noise as you want to, honey. It’s just us.”
So you let yourself go, practically moaning like a porn star as Bada pounds her fingers into you, your slick sloshing against them and pruning up her digits. She doesn’t seem to care at all, instead changing their position to crook them upwards, dragging them along your walls, indulging you in sexual gratification like you’ve never felt before.
“I want you to cum all over my fingers.” She breathes, the words so heavy you can barely make them out. “Cover me in your juices. Do it.”
Driving her point, Bada lowers her face to your pussy, licking her long tongue against your clit. She flicks it, then takes it into her mouth, swirling her tongue against it.
You immediately cry out in pleasure, your mouth gaping open and eyes closing shut as your fiancée smirks against your clit. She continues her pace, pistoning her fingers in and out of you until she brushes your sweet spot–
“Oh my god!” You scream, your eyes almost rolling back in sheer bliss. “Right there, right there!”
Bada opens her eyes–her lids heavy as makes eye contact with you. “Right here?” She pushes her finger in once again, crooking it up perfectly so that it hits your g-spot perfectly. “Oh yeah, that’s the spot, isn’t it?” She mutters to herself, a proud smile finding her lips.
That, coupled with one long, hard suck and swirl from her tongue on your clit makes your eyes roll back, insurmountable pleasure flowing through you as you cum.
“Soak me.” Bada guides you through it, holding onto your hand tightly to ground you as you embark on a world of bliss, her fingers and mouth never slowing down until you start to whine. 
“Please–” you choke out, your pussy sensitive from her touch.
Your fiancée slows her fingers and pops her mouth off your pussy, licking her lips before she fully pulls out her digits from inside of you. When she does, a gush of cum follows in her wake, trailing down and falling onto the linen sheets. She smiles at the sight, lifting her fingers to her mouth and sucking on your juices.
“I love the way you taste.” She separates her fingers to show you the beads of her spit and your slick combined into one debauched substance.
You sit up from bed, crawling over to her with a mischievous look. You grab her hand and bring it up to your lips, sucking on her fingers gently, moving your head up and down in a sensual motion.
“Fuck.” Bada watches you in awe, her cunt pulsing against her boxers and layers of clothes. “How are you so effortlessly alluring?”
You look up at your fiancée, dragging her fingers out of your mouth. “Bada…”
“Yes?” She asks, using her clean hand to brush her thumb over your cheek lovingly.
“Can I touch you too?” You drag your hand down Bada’s chest, stopping just before the waistband of her slacks.
Bada smiles and nods, grabbing your hand and beginning to take off her black shirt. She pulls it off of her body easily, letting it fall to the floor as her hand moves to remove her sports bra as well. You take the time to also remove your bra, now fully exposed while Bada takes off her slacks.
You try your hardest not to stare at her, but with every movement she does, her lean abs move, and her muscled arms strain. Bada Lee has an amazing body, and you can’t help but gape.
Your fiancée, unaware of your stare finally strips herself of her boxers–which she notes are wet with slick–and moves back onto the bed.
“You’re so pretty.” You whisper to her bashfully, moving your fingers up and down her abs.
The action makes Bada release a heavy breath from her nose, your feather-light touch making her abdominals stretch. “Thank you.” She smiles, leaning in to place a warm sweet kiss on your lips. 
You break away after a moment, leaning your head down and motioning for Bada to lay back. She does so immediately, encouraging you to do as you please with a hand on the back of your head. 
You slowly lower your head so you’re face-to-face with Bada’s cunt. You notice a few beads of wetness fall from her folds, making you smile proudly. She’s just as riled up as you.
Without a second thought, you part her lips like she had yours and place your hot mouth on her cunt, making her hiss. She throws her head back, once again her abs stretching as her long hair falls against her face. “Ah, fuck.”
You move your tongue inside of her, eyes going doe when she stares down at you with burning irises, so full of passion and heat that you unconsciously rub your thighs together, slick building between your legs again.
“You’re so good at that, baby.” Bada moans, grabbing your hair with enough force so that she can move you while still keeping her grip painless. She has to hold herself back–remember that this is about making love not fucking. Her full strength could truly hurt you. “Fuck yeah.” She curses, moving your head up and down as she uses you to pleasure herself.
You slip into a submissive role, allowing Bada to move and use you in any way, happy to bring her the same amount of ecstasy that she’d given you. You move your tongue in and out of her hot, gummy walls, slick running down your chin and the column of your throat until it dribbles in between the valley of your breasts.
Bada watches every movement and groans loudly, turned on out of her mind. She moves your head up and down faster, feeling every drag of your tongue and the pressure of your nose against her clit.
She’s so close, right there–
“Wait–” She breathes, letting go of your head. “Wait.”
You instantly shoot up, worried you’ve done something wrong. “Wha–”
Bada flips your position so you’re below her again. She takes your leg and crooks it against her hip, placing her cunt just inches away from your pussy. “I want to cum with you.” She heaves.
You stare up at your fiancée, your heart swelling in your chest to the point you’re worried it’ll burst. You grab her unoccupied hand and nod, smiling sweetly at her.
She smiles back, running her thumb over the engagement ring resting on your ring finger. She places a kiss on it before she uses her strength to lift herself up, and slowly lower her pussy against yours. She lets out another kiss, her cunt still sensitive from her almost release just minutes prior.
She starts out slow, rubbing up and down and positioning herself so that her lips meet the parting of yours. She encourages you to move with her, using her grip on your thigh to help you gain a rhythm in rubbing yourself against her.
You’re both so wet that loud squelching noises fill the air, your skin parting with strings of juices touching each other’s skin lewdly. Bada then starts to speed up her pace, rubbing up against your pussy as she sighs blissfully. She drags her hand up to your breast, grabs your nipple between her fingers, and starts to rub.
You let out a small moan which makes your fiancée twist your nipple with a bit more force, and then angle down enough so that she can flick her tongue against it. She takes your breast into her mouth, sucking rather harshly to pull out a louder moan from your parted lips.
She pops off your breast to smirk, pushing both of them together. “I love your tits.” She spits on them, then flattens her tongue and drags it across your nipples.
“Bada…” You trail off, tears of pleasure falling from your eyes.
“I know baby,” she mutters, her voice hitching when she angles her hips down at the perfect spot and applies just the perfect amount of pressure–she does it again. A mix of her groan and your cry ringing in the air. She slaps her pussy against your own, the shock of bliss shoots up her spine, and makes her curse. “Fuck, cum with me.” She closes her eyes, losing herself in the pleasure. “Fucking cum with me, honey. Let go and give me your all. I want it.”
So you give her what she wants.
Both you and Bada cum seconds later, both of your eyes closed tight in ecstasy as your pussies still rub against each other’s, riding out the high until you no longer can.
Your fiancée is the first to pull away, gently letting go of your thigh and stretching it onto the bed. Exhausted, she flops beside you, breathing heavily.
“How do you feel?” She checks up on you, her eyes finding yours in an instant.
“So good.” You admit with a smile.
Bada grins back at you, scooting closer to you until her body is pressed against your side. She flips you around so that you’re facing her as she wraps her arms around your waist. “Hi.” She mumbles sweetly.
“Hi.” You mumble back, holding back a giggle.
Both of your bodies are hot and shining with sweat, but neither of you cares. You stay tangled together, simply staring into each other’s eyes.
This time when you look into her irises, there’s no storm brewing–no icey wall keeping you separated from her. Just her pretty, dark brown irises. This is the woman you’d fallen in love with.
Your fiancée’s eyes say, “I know who I am.”
“I’m glad,” yours say back.
Bada leans forward, rubbing her nose against yours in a sweet gesture. Then she moves to place her lips inches away from your ear, whispering, “I love you.”
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❝ the pain of grief is just as much a part of life as the joy of love; it is, perhaps, the price we pay for love, the cost of commitment. ❞
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taglist:
@aericrys, @somerandomtinyperson, @bluebada, @dallaji, @luvjanexx, @hyejuwu, @diana-rose-25, @jjlovesbada, @cephox, @prilux, @youknow1234, @fae-the-wanderer @mightymyo, @aein-tings, @badasgirlfriend, @onlyyou-metanoia, @wiselight @badasoneandonly, @multiliker, @badabonita, @randomhoex, @justaharmlesspotat0, @sporadicfacebasement, @4bada, @seungxstar, @urlovebot, @neuftaeng, @hyunsllvr, @aixicl, @itzmy
(if your name is crossed out i wasn't able to to tag you)
want to join the taglist? send me a message or comment saying you'd like to be on it, and i'll add you!
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608 notes · View notes
puppym3 · 4 months ago
Note
heyaaa!!! if u still do requests, i have a request for minho! if u also havent done this one, but what if u do their song "i like it" about minho ??
☆ ★ ✮ ★ ☆
── .✦ 'i love that i like you, but i don't wanna love'
minho x reader
wc: 4.1k
warnings: MDNI! 18+, situationship, fwb, angsty, one-sided pining, minho is an asshole, "i can fix him" reader, awkward, reader is so delusional at the start it's funny, hurt comfort, late confessions, fluffy at end, i heal ur wounds dw, (lmk if i missed any)
a/n: omg anon ur trying to break my heart, as a hopeless romantic this might be my first ever sort of angsty piece. but either way i love "i like it" its literally been on repeat its probs one of my favorites from the album. i loved writing this so much you have no idea, THANK YOU for suggesting!
reminder to not be too delulu, these are just fictional stories that i write to show off my creative writing!! also i have a taglist if you're interested!!!!!
☆ ★ ✮ ★ ☆
☆ ★ ✮ ★ ☆
The city lights glimmered through the window, casting a soft glow across Minho's apartment. The hum of the city outside was a constant reminder of the world continuing on, regardless of the turmoil within. You lay on the bed, staring up at the ceiling, Minho's arm draped lazily over your waist. The familiar scent of his cologne lingered in the air, a mix of comfort and longing that you had come to know too well.
"Hey," Minho's voice broke through your thoughts. He propped himself up on one elbow, looking down at you with those piercing eyes that always seemed to see right through you. "You okay?"
You forced a smile, nodding slightly. "Yeah, just thinking."
He sighed, brushing a strand of hair away from your face. "You know you can talk to me, right?"
That was the problem. Talking meant opening up, and opening up meant risking the fragile balance you had. Friends with benefits, a situationship, whatever it was, it worked because there were no labels, no expectations. At least, that's what you kept telling yourself.
"Minho," you started, hesitating. The words felt heavy on your tongue, a mix of hope and fear. "What are we doing?"
His expression softened, but there was a flicker of something—uncertainty, maybe?—in his eyes. "We're having fun, aren't we?"
"Yeah, but..." You sat up, pulling the sheets around you like a shield. "Is that all this is? Just fun?"
He ran a hand through his hair, a habit you had come to recognize as his way of stalling for time. "I like what we have, you know that. I just... I,"
You swallowed hard, the words stinging more than you wanted to admit. "And what if I want more?"
Minho's gaze dropped, his silence louder than any answer he could give. 'I like you'—if only it were that easy.
"I can't do this forever, Minho," you whispered, your voice barely audible. "I need to know if there's a future here, or if I'm just fooling myself."
He looked back at you, his eyes filled with a mix of regret and confusion. "I'm not ready for anything more right now."
The words hung in the air, a painful confirmation of your deepest fears. You nodded slowly, the ache in your chest spreading. "I understand."
As you got dressed and prepared to leave, Minho reached out, his hand catching yours. "Wait, don't go like this."
You paused, looking at him one last time. "I need to go think."
With that, you slipped out of his grasp, each step away from him feeling heavier than the last. The door closed behind you, the finality of it echoing in the empty hallway.
That night, you cried until your eyes were raw and your head ached until there were no tears left and all that was left was an empty feeling in your chest.
"What are you doing here?"
You saw your best friend standing in your doorway, her brow furrowed with worry. "I needed to see you, you didn't pick up any calls."
You felt the tears starting to form again as she pulled you into her arms. "I'm an idiot," you managed to say in between sobs.
She gently patted your back. "You're not an idiot, he's the idiot."
"He's not an idiot," you said softly.
She held you at arm's length, looking into your eyes. "Then tell me what happened. What has your eyes all puffy at 9 in the morning?"
"He wants to be just friends, that's all." you sighed.
"What?" her brows furrowed. "I thought you liked each other? What's stopping him?"
"I asked what he wants to be, and he said 'he's not ready for anything'."
She groaned, "he doesn't deserve you"
You let out a deep breath. "He doesn't, does he? But, I like him."
"Why are you putting yourself through this?" She said with worry in her eyes as she traced circles on your back.
"I wanted to fight for him, but every time I end up in his bed, I hurt myself more."
"Fight for him?"
You nodded slowly, your resolve hardening as you said the words aloud. "I'm going to fight for him."
She rolled her eyes, a small smile tugging at the corners of her lips. "And how are you going to do that?"
You hesitated, realizing that you hadn't thought that far ahead. "I guess I'll... call him? No, no that would be awkward... maybe I'll just stop by his apartment and—"
She raised an eyebrow, looking at you pointedly. "And what, you're gonna sleep with him again? What would that do?"
Your cheeks flushed. "Okay, no. Maybe I'll take him out to coffee? No, that's too casual. Maybe dinner?"
"Dinner would be good."
"Dinner would be good," you agreed, a hint of nervousness creeping into your voice.
Your best friend put her arm around your shoulder and gave you a reassuring squeeze. "You shouldn't be doing this, but I support you."
"Thank you."
She shook her head, laughing softly. "If it doesn't work, we're gonna eat so much comfort food tonight."
That afternoon, you paced around your apartment, phone in hand as you tried to muster up the courage to call Minho. Your best friend's words echoed in your mind, reminding you of the risk you were taking. With a deep breath, you hit the call button.
As the phone rang, you felt your heart pounding in your chest, your palms growing clammy. After what felt like an eternity, the familiar sound of Minho's voice filled your ear.
"Hey, it's me." You paused, gathering your thoughts. "I wanted to apologize for the other night. I was upset and I shouldn't have taken it out on you."
You could hear the hesitance in his voice as he replied, "No, it's alright. I'm sorry, too."
"Can I take you out for dinner? I think we need to talk about things." You held your breath, waiting for his response.
"Yeah... I think that'd be okay," he said after a moment, "When?"
"I'm free tonight," you offered, trying to hide the hopeful note in your voice.
There was a long silence before Minho spoke again, "Okay, I'll see you at 6."
You hung up, the finality of the words hitting you. Was this your last chance?
The minutes passed by slowly, your anticipation building with each passing minute. Finally, 6 o'clock came around, and you made your way to the restaurant. You took a deep breath, steadying your nerves as you pushed open the doors.
You spotted Minho seated at a table, and made your way over to him. He stood as you approached, smiling.
"Hey," he said softly, his voice sending shivers down your spine.
"Hey." You swallowed, trying to find your words. "I, I've missed you."
Minho looked away, a mix of emotions on his face. "It's been a day."
You laughed, trying to ease the tension. "Oh, right."
There was a moment of awkward silence before Minho finally spoke again, his voice barely a whisper.
"I think I missed you too."
You looked at him, the realization dawning on you. He had missed you too. It was something, he at least thought about you during day. "Minho—"
He looked up, meeting your gaze. "What is it?"
"I just..." You took a deep breath. "I don't want to lose what we have. But if that means being friends, then that's what we'll do. Because I can't stand losing you completely."
He stared at you for a moment, his eyes filled with surprise. Then he nodded slowly. "I don't want to lose what we have as well."
Your chest ached, but you smiled anyway, grateful for the small victory. You would be fine with it. You could be fine with it if that's all you could ever get.
"But," you started, an idea coming to your mind, "if I get a boyfriend, we'll stop whatever this is."
Minho blinked, the words sinking in. He took a moment, contemplating. Then he nodded slowly.
"Okay," he said. "Okay."
His expression was unreadable, was he upset? Or was he fine with the idea of never speaking to you again?
Your heart sank at the thought, did he really feel nothing at all for you?
You forced yourself to smile, trying to hide the ache in your chest. "Thank you," you said softly.
Minho smiled, but you could tell it was forced. You excused yourself and went to the washroom to splash cold water on your face, trying to stop the tears that threatened to spill.
You had to leave, you had to get out of here. You made your way outside, the cool night air helping to calm you.
You leaned against the wall, taking a shaky breath as you tried to hold back the tears. You closed your eyes, taking deep breaths, trying to calm your racing heartbeat.
You forced yourself to come to reality with all of this, you ran home without thinking twice. You had to end all of this now and leave before you ended up in his bed again.
You slammed your front door shut, locking the deadbolt and falling on the ground crying. The tears wouldn't stop flowing, it felt like a river of emotion that was overwhelming you. You were so scared of losing him, of not having him in your life. You sat on the ground for what felt like an eternity, trying to make sense of your emotions.
Getting rid of him now was the only way, the only way you'd survive without being broken-hearted. You dragged yourself to bed and cried yourself to sleep, clutching the pillow and blankets like they were your lifeline.
A week had already passed. You did your best to stay busy, trying to distract yourself from thinking about Minho. You had blocked his number, so you had no idea if he had tried to reach out to you at all.
Your best friend had been beside you to keep you from losing your mind completely or unblocking his number.
The two of you decided to watch movies all weekend long to take your minds off the situation, which helped for a while, but now that it was Monday and you were back at work, you felt like a walking zombie.
Your thoughts drifted to Minho throughout the day, wondering what he was doing, if he had moved on yet, or if he still thought of you at all.
You pushed the thoughts out of your head, trying to focus on your work. But it was no use. He was constantly in your mind, even though you knew there was no point in thinking of him.
You closed your eyes, letting your mind wander back to when things were still good between the two of you, the feeling of his tender hands on your body and his soft lips against yours. You remembered his words, 'I like what we have.' Did he mean it? Did he still think that after everything that happened? Or were they just words?
You opened your eyes, tears forming again as you stared out the window, lost in thought.
The clock seemed to move agonizingly slowly, but eventually, your workday came to an end, and you gathered your things to head home. You took a deep breath before heading out the door, bracing yourself for another long, lonely night.
You walked slowly through the dark streets, lost in your thoughts. You came across a familiar intersection, and you hesitated, memories of Minho flooding your mind.
The two of you used to take this route back to your apartment when he would walk you home from work. You stood in the middle of the empty intersection, staring at the stoplight, debating on whether to continue home or take the long way to your apartment, the way the two of you used to take.
You shook your head, trying to clear your thoughts. It was silly, getting hung up on someone that didn't even care.
You crossed the street, heading in the direction of your apartment. You glanced down the familiar route, memories of the two of you talking about the stupidest things.
You closed your eyes and sighed, a pang of longing hitting you. You missed him so much, more than you had ever expected.
You kept your eyes closed, your mind replaying memories of Minho as you walked home. It hurt to think about, but it also hurt not to think about him.
The two of you were inseparable, even when you fell in love with him, he enabled your feelings, kissing you, touching you, and sharing nights with you.
He was so easy to love. And he was so easy to lose.
You opened your eyes as you reached your apartment, the familiar surroundings providing you with a sense of comfort.
You trudged up the stairs, feeling more drained than you had all week. You reached your apartment, the familiar walls surrounding you like a warm embrace.
You threw your keys onto the table, slumping down in a chair and closing your eyes.
You breathed in the comforting scent of home, the ache in your chest still lingering, but you felt a sense of calm wash over you. You were home.
You sat for a few minutes, just enjoying the feeling of being at home after a long day at work. The quiet was comforting, a contrast to the busy, loud environment you'd spent your day in. You sat with your eyes closed for a few minutes, allowing your thoughts to settle.
You heard a faint knock on your front door. Your heart stopped, and you shot up out of your chair, hesitantly walking to the door.
You paused, taking a deep breath before opening it, knowing you couldn't keep it locked forever.
"Minho." The word slipped out before you could stop it, your voice a mix of surprise and pain.
Minho's face was somber, his expression unreadable as he spoke.
"I think I love you."
His voice was soft, the words tinged with sadness. You looked into his eyes, seeing the pain there.
You took a deep breath, your heart aching. You opened your mouth to reply, but he continued, the words pouring out of him.
"I'm sorry. I didn't think it would feel so painful to not see you, or hear your voice, or touch you. I just couldn't stop thinking about you, about how you made me feel."
You couldn't hold back the tears any longer as his words filled your ears, your chest aching more than it had in a long time.
You bit your lip, trying to stay calm. Is this real, or are you dreaming? Did he come back to fuck with your feelings?
Your heart pounded in your chest, a mixture of pain and happiness flooding you as you looked into his eyes, trying to see if he was sincere.
His face was pained, his expression vulnerable as he stood in your doorway. You hesitated, trying to find the words to say.
He stepped closer to you, closing the space between you, the proximity causing your heart to skip a beat.
"I liked what we had, that part is true. But I never realized how I felt until you disappeared from my life."
You tried to breathe evenly as he reached out to take your hands, his touch gentle as he spoke again.
"I know I've been selfish this entire time, but I miss you. I miss everything about you."
His words pierced through your heart, leaving you speechless. You were frozen in place, trying to comprehend his words.
Minho closed his eyes, a small smile forming on his face. "I missed you."
The two of you stood in silence for a few seconds, his hands holding yours tightly as he stared into your eyes, his gaze softening as you finally managed to reply.
"I missed you, too."
Without hesitation, you grabbed his face and pulled him in, crashing your lips together as his hands pulled you close to him, holding you as if you would disappear any second.
Your hands moved from his face to the nape of his neck as the kiss grew deeper, his lips parting as the two of you explored each other's mouths.
Minho's hands roamed your body as yours did his, a familiar warmth spreading through your body as you gave yourself to him once again.
You broke apart for air, panting as you tried to catch your breath. The two of you stood there in your doorway for a moment, catching your breaths and staring at each other, neither one wanting to let go.
You were still unsure of where your relationship stood, but as Minho's hand reached for your waist once more and pulled you close, his lips capturing yours again, all your worries seemed to disappear.
He guided you into your apartment, shutting the door behind him and backing you against the wall. Your hands found the back of his head once again as you melted into his touch, his kisses filled with longing.
His hand wandered up your back and into your hair as his other hand rested on your hip, a soft groan escaping his lips as the kiss grew deeper. You wrapped your leg around his, your body pressing against him as you held him close, trying to convey the emotions you couldn't put into words.
After a few minutes, you finally broke the kiss, looking into his eyes as you both panted softly. Your chest was pounding as you looked up at him, trying to read his expression.
He smiled softly at you, his face flushed from the intensity of the kiss. His eyes met yours and held your gaze, a small smile tugging at the corner of his lips as he took in your flushed cheeks and disheveled hair.
He reached up, gently tucking a strand of hair behind your ear, his thumb caressing your cheek as he leaned in and pressed a soft kiss against your forehead.
You felt a familiar warmth spreading through your chest at his touch, a small smile forming on your lips as you reached up and wrapped your arms around his neck. You leaned into him, your chest pressing against his as you hugged him tightly, your cheek resting against his.
He hugged you back, his arms wrapping around you as you nuzzled your nose against his neck, breathing in his familiar scent. The two of you stayed like that for a few moments, enjoying each other's warmth and closeness, the silence broken only by the soft sound of his heart beating.
The two of you stood in each other's arms for what felt like an eternity, but could have been minutes or hours. Time didn't exist anymore as the two of you held onto each other, neither one wanting to let go.
Finally, you reluctantly pulled away, looking into his eyes as you spoke. "We should probably talk properly."
His eyes searched yours, his expression serious as he nodded, a hint of hesitation in his voice. "Okay," he said softly.
You nodded, stepping away from him and moving to the living room, the distance between the two of you growing again. You sat down on the couch, your hands resting in your lap as you stared down at them.
Minho sat down next to you, his body tense as he watched you.
You looked up at him, meeting his eyes as you gathered your thoughts. You opened your mouth to speak, but the words seemed to get caught in your throat, your voice coming out barely louder than a whisper. "I've loved you ever since we started sleeping together."
Minho's eyes widened slightly as he stared at you, his mouth slightly agape as your words registered with him. You felt a familiar pang of sadness in your chest as you remembered that time.
He looked down, his voice barely above a whisper. "Why didn't you say anything?"
You bit your lip, struggling to find the right words. "I thought you knew. I would always bring up going further with you, but you dismissed me."
You looked down, fidgeting with your hands as you tried to hold back tears. "I just thought things would change if we put labels on things."
The silence in the air grew deafening as you looked up, your heart pounding as you saw tears forming in Minho's eyes. He reached out and placed his hand on your shoulder, his touch light and reassuring.
"But I want those labels now, all of them," he whispered. "I'm so sorry I made you feel that way."
The tears that had been threatening to fall finally began to trickle down your cheeks as you looked up at him. "Minho, I thought you felt nothing for me."
He reached out and gently brushed the tears away from your face, his eyes filled with concern as he stared into your eyes.
Minho took a deep breath before continuing. "I know I've hurt you, but I never want to see you cry again."
Your chest ached as you tried to process his words. It was as if everything you had gone through since the 'break-up' was suddenly erased, as if none of it had mattered. You stared into his eyes, trying to figure out what to say.
Minho's lips curved up into a small smile as he cupped your cheeks, wiping away the tears with his thumb as he gazed into your eyes.
You reached up and wrapped your hands around his, holding onto them tightly as you felt a familiar warmth spreading through your chest at his touch.
"I want to try and start again, as your boyfriend," he said softly, placing a soft kiss on the back of your hand.
You felt your heart racing as the words left his mouth, your chest tightening as he looked into your eyes, searching for your reaction.
You took a deep breath, your eyes closing for a second as you tried to steady yourself, the words that left his mouth feeling almost unreal. "Minho," you breathed. "Is this real? Are you serious?"
A smile broke out onto his face as he nodded. "If you'll let me, yes."
Without saying a word, you grabbed his shirt, pulling him into a kiss as your heart raced, the tears on your face now dried.
Minho kissed you back with equal intensity, his hands cupping your face as your hands tangled themselves into his hair. The kiss was soft and filled with longing as the two of you lost yourselves in the moment.
As your lips parted, you felt Minho's forehead pressed against yours as his hands traced down to the small of your back, holding you close. You closed your eyes and smiled, relishing the feeling of being in his arms once again.
You wrapped your arms around his neck as he held you, the two of you taking in the feeling of each other. It had only been a week, but it felt like a lifetime had passed.
"I'm your girlfriend now?" you asked hesitantly, still not sure if this was all real.
Minho laughed softly as he nodded. "You're my girlfriend," he confirmed, his voice filled with affection.
You laughed and leaned back, taking in his expression and memorizing the look in his eyes, feeling a warmth in your heart you hadn't felt for a while.
He suddenly wrapped his arms around your waist, picking you up with ease as you shrieked in surprise. He carried you to the bed and gently placed you down on the mattress as if you were made of glass, the mattress shifting from the weight of his body as he moved to lie beside you.
"What do we do now?" you asked softly as his hands cupped your face, his thumb brushing lightly against your lips as he leaned in for a tender kiss.
When he broke away, you found yourself expecting more, but he simply smiled at you as he laid back down and pulled you closer, wrapping an arm around your waist to hold you.
"This is all I want to do," he whispered, nuzzling your neck and kissing it lightly. "I want to fall asleep holding you and wake up beside you in the morning."
His words were tender as they reached your ears, making your heart melt.
"Okay," you breathed, pressing a kiss on his cheek and turning around so your back was facing his chest. You snuggled closer to him as he pulled you close, his hands resting on your abdomen and holding you tightly as he buried his face into your neck, kissing it.
You breathed in deeply, his scent surrounding you as your heart swelled with affection.
"Good night, I love you."
His voice was soft, but you could feel the emotion behind the words. You let out a soft sigh as your eyelids fluttered shut, the feeling of Minho holding you lulling you to sleep.
☆ ★ ✮ ★ ☆
taglist for my beauties : @loverbangchan, @reignessance, @imperfectlyperfectprincess1, @armystay89, @ihrtlix, @jiyeonslays, @lovestaysblogs, @jeyelleohe, @celebration88
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