#merry clitsmas

[vixstarria]

A night at the inn (part 2)

Smut galore!

Part 1 here - it's the build-up to this, but not required reading if you're just after some smut

Astarion x Tav x Halsin, Astarion x F!Reader x Halsin

18+, smut, threesome, porn no plot, dirty talk, oral sex, PIV, various kinks in passing, soft dom Astarion, Astarion being a little shit

Approx. 2,700 words (what the hell, how did that happen)

AO3

“Is it company or privacy you desire?” 

You and Astarion, who had been lying on top of you, one of your legs wrapped around his hips, turned your heads towards the druid, who paused in the doorway.  

Astarion turned back to you to give you a wicked look, as though to say it was your call, before untangling himself from you, with a final slow teasing roll of his hips.    

“It seems... Astarion desires a show…" You followed him with your gaze as he got up to pour himself more wine, searching for any signs of apprehension or anything that resembled a slipping mask. You saw no such thing. “...And I desire to indulge him,” you added, turning to look at the druid.  

“Only a show?” Halsin frowned, but stepped into the room, shutting the door behind him. “I am more than happy to accommodate that, only I thought you of all people would like to take part,” he added, looking at Astarion.  

“It’s... complicated,” said Astarion, sliding back onto the bed and letting you lean back against him. “Darling, would you care to explain our current arrangement to our friend?” he asked, trailing a finger down your neck, sending a tinging shiver down your spine.  

“Astarion has been taking a break from anything below the waist, for himself...” 

“Say no more, I understand,” said Halsin.  

Astarion raised his glass and nodded towards Halsin, glad to not need to explain himself any further, before taking a sip.  

"And you?” Halsin asked, his voice a low and sensual rumble, his eyes piercing through you. Now that the smaller details were out of the way, you suddenly realised just what you had gotten yourself into, and you found yourself at a rare loss for words.  

You’ve done this before, but never in such fine company. And never with the added complication of having to take anyone’s feelings into consideration. 

Astarion’s fingers slid further down, below your collarbone, and slipped beneath the fabric of your blouse, circling down to one of your breasts. 

“You are not taking any ‘breaks'?” Halsin continued, approaching the bed, breaking eye contact briefly to follow the motions of Astarion's hand, as he started to roll and pinch one of your nipples, before looking back into your eyes, quizzically.  

You'd hardly started, and already you felt utterly exposed, a heat growing beneath your stomach. You were completely overwhelmed. Articulating anything was impossible.  

“Darling..?” Astarion said, softly, when you did not reply. “Are you with us?” 

“No breaks, only insatiable cravings,” you managed, wetting your lips. You tilted your head back to look into Astarion’s wine-coloured eyes. “I think I need you to take control,” you murmured. 

“Oh? Getting timid all of a sudden?” he set his wine down to brush your lower lip with his thumb. “You want me to tell him how to scratch your itch? Make sure he does it right?”   

“I trust you,” you nodded, swallowing.  

Astarion breathed a quick soundless laugh and gave you a brief but tender kiss.  

“Very well...” he lifted his gaze to regard Halsin. “Her sweet lips are mine, but you can have free reign over the rest of her, unless she says otherwise,” said Astarion. “My love you will speak up if there is anything you don’t enjoy?” he asked, lifting your chin to make you look at him. “I can’t make every decision for you, pet.”  

You nodded. Halsin took it as a cue to finally break the distance between you. He started by lifting your leg to unlace your boots. 

“What do you want to see?” he asked Astarion. 

“Hmm,” he deliberated. “I think... No, I know she wants to be fucked senseless. Don’t you, pet? Tell us.” he urged with a devilish grin, his eyes still locked on yours, as you managed a weak ‘mmhmm’. “Let’s see that.”   

Halsin pulled off your boots and before you knew what was happening, one of your feet was in his mouth. You gasped as you felt his tongue swirling between your toes. 

“I knew he was absolutely feral!” laughed Astarion. “No no, let him do it,” he added as you squirmed. “But you are completely overdressed for all this, love.”  

Astarion pulled your blouse off over your head, exposing your breasts, and began to undo the lacing on your pants. Halsin attempted to pull them off but they got stuck around your knees. For the first time since you've met him, you saw exasperation on the druid's face, as he struggled. 

“I would outlaw clothing if I could,” he growled.  

This seemed to amuse Astarion to no end, as he fell back onto the bed, pulling you with him. You somehow ended up being flipped onto your stomach and into Astarion's arms by Halsin, in his fight with your trousers. You giggled as he finally managed to pull them off.  

”Are all your dirty dreams coming true, darling?” Astarion whispered to you, kissing your neck below your ear. 

You felt Halsin's bulk lower himself onto you, holding himself up over you and Astarion with his arms to either of your sides. He left hot, open-mouthed kisses down your back, starting from the opposite side of your neck. You were caught between the coolness of Astarion's skin and the heat that was radiating from Halsin's body.  

“This is impossible,” Halsin groaned as he realised that you were still in your smallclothes. Having run out of patience he resorted to simply tearing them off you in a swift and deliberate motion.  

You let out an involuntary squeal as Astarion wedged a knee between your legs and used it to spread them apart for the druid. 

“Be a good girl now and don't cause any more trouble,” he purred. You hummed your assent and lifted your hips up, your face buried in Astarion's neck. 

Halsin's tongue plunged into you, lapping up your wetness, making you let out a moan.  

Astarion tangled his fingers into your hair at the back of your head, near the roots, and pulled on it to lift your head up. 

“I want to see your face while his tongue is in you,” he whispered. “He’s being good to you, isn’t he?” You held Astarion's gaze as Halsin continued to lick between your legs. You tried and failed to stifle another moan and arched your back further, as he dipped lower to tease your clit with his tongue. Astarion moved his hand to caress your face, before parting your lips with his thumb. You caught it in your mouth. “Yes, I can tell he is... But you want more, don’t you?” You sucked on his thumb and nodded with a whimper, looking into his eyes. “Don’t be shy... Tell us what you want...” You grazed Astarion's thumb with your teeth and giggled, shaking your head. You knew he wouldn’t let it slide though.  

“You brat,” he smiled, his eyes narrowing, before looking past your shoulder and raising his voice. “Don’t give her anything unless she asks for it, nicely. In fact, you should stop what you’re doing now.”  

To your dismay, the druid lifted his head from you. 

“It would be my pleasure to help teach her manners,” he said. He stroked your wet slit with his fingers in place of his tongue, but it was only a tease that made you crave more.  

“Beg him,” Astarion said, grinning, pulling your hair to turn your head sideways, so you could take in a view of the druid over your shoulder. 

You shot daggers at Astarion with your eyes. You were glad he was enjoying himself so much, but this man, who had been flicking his tongue over your asshole just seconds prior, was supposed to adhere to your authority at tomorrow morning’s itinerary discussion meeting.   

“Please...” you managed.  

“Please what?” smirked Astarion.  

“I may have a hunch about what she wants,” said Halsin, slipping a single finger in, shallowly, just one phalange deep, and sliding it in and out of you, teasingly. “Is this it?” 

“No, no, she needs to say it herself,” interjected Astarion.  

“I want more...” you moaned. 

“More?” Halsin slipped a second finger in, keeping it agonisingly shallow. 

“Your cock! I want your cock deep in me... Please...” you were too frustrated to care anymore.  

“Good girl...” purred Astarion. “I’m going to remember this, you know,” he added with a smirk. “Next time you get too sassy with me, I’ll just recall our fearless leader begging for dick.” 

“Listen here, you-” you started, exasperated, but were cut off by him pulling you into a deep kiss. He trailed his hand down your stomach until his fingers reached your slit, dipping in. You moaned into his mouth as he began to gently roll your swollen clit between his fingers the way he knew you liked.  

You heard Halsin discarding his own clothes behind you, and were about to turn to look back, but Astarion held your chin.  

“Ah-ah, no peeking! Let’s keep it a surprise.” He looked over your shoulder. “A very... big... surprise.” 

You felt Halsin start to work his way in with his cock, in slow, rolling thrusts, gradually filling you, inch by inch. You were completely soaked, and stretched to accommodate him, but gods he felt huge. Exactly as big as you would expect by looking at the sheer size of the druid himself. 

You whimpered as he filled you completely and began his deliberate, rhythmic thrusts.  

“More than what you’d bargained for, darling?” Astarion whispered in your ear, continuing to rub your clit. “But you’re taking it so well, my good girl...” All you could do was whimper and moan, as he continued to stroke you and whisper obscenities to you. “That huge cock, all for you...” 

“She’s starting to quiver around me already,” groaned Halsin.  

“Is she now?” Astarion removing his fingers from your clit. “Do we need to talk about manners again? You don’t want to be rude to our friend by coming so soon and all by yourself, do you?”  

“I’ll be good, just don’t stop, please” you whimpered. You could not handle another interruption. 

“You have some catching up to do,” Astarion directed at Halsin.  

Halsin’s thrusts sped up to an infernal pace, as Astarion pulled on your hair again to lick and nip at your exposed neck, running his tongue over your fresh puncture wounds, where it still felt so sweet for you.  

“I’ll be generous, I know how much you want it,” Astarion rasped in your ear. “I want it too.” 

He resumed rubbing circles around your clit and you found yourself falling to pieces, a mewling mess. 

“Don’t get shy now... That’s it... Let us hear how much you like it,” Astarion continued, hoarsely. 

You felt the first ripples of your climax coming on, your moans mounting louder and deeper with each wave.  

“Fuck her through her orgasm. She likes that,” Astarion threw over your shoulder.  

Halsin’s thrusts somehow got even harder then, and you screamed into Astarion’s neck as your pleasure completely overtook you. The sound of skin slapping on skin had already been loud enough to hear halfway across the inn, if anyone in the adjacent rooms had been sleeping through that, they were awake now.  

Halsin’s penis slipped out of you and you collapsed, melting into Astarion’s embrace, no longer able to keep yourself up.  

“Still enjoying yourself, my sweet?” he whispered only loud enough for you to hear. “Do you want more?” 

“Gods, yes,” you answered.  

“We’re not done yet,” he said louder, with a grin, as Halsin pulled you off the vampire by your waist, flipping you onto your back on the bed.

You spread your legs as Halsin settled between them, sitting up. He couldn’t have been far himself, as he entered you again, with quick, needful thrusts, lifting one of your legs onto his shoulder. Your breasts bounced with every thrust, and you raised your hands to hold them, pinching your own nipples. 

“What a sight you are...” purred Astarion, off to your side. “Let us enjoy the view better.”  

You let go of your breasts and raised yourself on your elbows, eager to enjoy a view yourself as you watched Halsin’s cock ram you, slick with your wetness.  

Suddenly you were distracted by Astarion unlacing his pants to release his pulsing cock. Unable to contain his need any longer, he began to stroke himself. You couldn’t look away. 

“Can I have it in my mouth..? Please..?” you implored.  

There had to be a delicate balance to your pleading.  

You knew he didn’t want to feel pressured. Not even by your need and desperation.  

You also knew how he wanted to be wanted. He loved to hear you beg. He revelled in it. In the knowledge that he had such a grasp on your arousal. He would often tease you relentlessly. Usually, he would allow you to find your release eventually, whether with his fingers or tongue, or just from grinding against him. A few times, you pleasured yourself for him, while he watched. But sometimes, it was just a ‘no’ despite the teasing he had initiated himself. Being in control was another thing he revelled in.  

“Desperate, are we?” he breathed. 

“Astarion, please... Anything... Just a taste.” 

He lifted your chin, angling your face toward him. 

“Just the tip, with your tongue. I’ll take all your treats away if you get too greedy.” 

You hadn’t done this since before your talk about wanting something real together. Your heart just about leapt into your throat.  

He continued to stroke himself as you swirled your tongue around the swollen head of his penis, licking up his precum, looking into his eyes.

“I’ve missed this too, my sweet” he murmured as he watched you through his eyelashes, his voice thick. 

Halsin was being a complete menace, rubbing your clit and licking the arch of your foot, and you started to get carried away, close to climaxing again, and wrapped your mouth around the tip of Astarion’s cock. 

“Ah-ah! Make sure she behaves,” Astarion said to Halsin. 

Halsin pinched your clit, just enough to make you jump and distract you. You moaned and continued with just your tongue, as Halsin pounded into you.  

“Shall I go easy on her?” Halsin asked.  

“Absolutely not,” said Astarion. “Just a little longer, love. You can hold out longer for me, can’t you?” he asked you, stroking your cheek with his hand.   

This was becoming impossible. Between Halsin’s incessant thrusts and stroking of your clit, and your added arousal from finally being able to taste Astarion, you were losing your mind. But you did not want to come before he did.  

“I can’t!” you gasped between strokes with your tongue. “I can’t...’ 

Halsin took some mercy on you then, pausing the circles he had been drawing around your clit, as everything else continued. 

Astarion was breathing harder, stroking himself faster.  

“You can come for us now... Come for me...” he rasped. 

Two more firm strokes of Halsin’s thumb, and you came undone again, your walls clenching around Halsin, your legs shaking, just as Astarion’s cum filled your mouth, some of it spilling and leaking down your chin and the corner of your mouth. You were completely spent, as you swallowed what you could. You barely even registered Halsin pulling out his cock to spill his own seed all over your chest and stomach. 

Astarion knelt down next to you, trying to regain his breath, and pressed his forehead against yours briefly, before drawing you into a kiss, tasting himself on your tongue. You felt his lips breaking into a smile as you kissed.  

A short while later you lounged on the bed, your head on Astarion’s stomach as he played with your hair, your legs thrown across Halsin’s lap. Halsin was fiddling with his herbs and pipes again.  

“Care for more catnip?” he asked Astarion. 

“I’m never going to live that down, am I?” Astarion rolled his eyes. “But yes. ...Only to prove that it’s not going to do anything this time!” 

Sure enough, a minute later Astarion once again sat with a ditsy expression, on the verge of breaking out into inane giggling. 

“Gods, I’m not sure I can handle him like this again,” you sighed, shooting Halsin a reproachful look. 

“This is a beautiful, glorious thing - he is embracing the opportunity to get reacquainted with nature,” the druid shrugged. 

“Tell us about the bear you fucked again,” Astarion tittered.  

~~~

Part 3

AO3

Hope you enjoyed, check out my other work

[lesbiansovereverything]

Merry Clitsmas (╯°□°）╯︵ ┻━┻

[jonnyrocker420]

Merry Clitsmas

[mikkouille]

[cicaklah]

Pairing: Michael Burnham/Ash Tyler.

Rating: Merry Clitsmas.

Summary: Loyalty must be demanded; Loyalty must be demonstrated. (aka: the mirror universe made them do it, and I thought a lot about the logistics of them doing it.)

A SELECTION OF TAGS: Michael Burnham is a virgin who can't drive, cunnilingus, punishment in theory but they both really want it in practice, pretending not to be crazy for each other, ash tyler proving his loyalty on his knees on the bridge, deus ex leggings

--

The mirror universe is pretty wild, friends, and I cannot lie, I have watched 1x10 three times and I didn’t even think I was Into Them, but turns out that I am REALLY into how devoted Ash is to Michael, and how much I love both of them and just want them to be happy, is that so much to ask? Is it? Oh. It is?

This is as non-dubconny as the mirror universe and ‘x made them do it’ can be, I think, but reader discretion is advised.

Also this is my 50th fic on the AO3! 

[shamwowguyatchurch]

New. T-Sex. Album. Soon. Merry Clitsmas. "Writing" Begins Now.

[mikkouille]

merry clitsmas lol