#meme voice: I am once again crying over how much I love my partners

[little-shiny-sharpies]

I like to imagine, somewhere in their realities, f/os feel very loved whenever someone here thinks of them fondly or cries over how much they love them.

For some reason, no matter how dark and grim their world may be, there’s a moment where they stop for a moment and feel a sense of something wash over them in an invisible light. Perhaps joy or hope, pride, glee, or maybe just content with the world around them for a moment, and all their worries fade away for a few minutes.

Maybe sometimes the feeling is so intense they can’t help but shed a tear or two of joy while doing some monotonous task before wondering where such feeling came from. Fading as quickly as it arrived.

And when you’re suddenly overcome with awe of how beautiful the sky in the parking lot is, suddenly stopping and realize how inconceivably small the chances of you existing were, about how happy you are you get to experience a world with so many of your favorite drinks, about how much you enjoy your own company, or suddenly feeling a sense of pride in yourself for something monotonous..

Maybe that’s them, loving you.

[lookingfts]

hello!! omg so happy you’re on tumblr!

love love love every kanthony fic you write. i get an email that you’ve posted and will literally get giddy thinking about going home and reading it. truly you can do no wrong! my favorites are definitely hush (i reread this constantly actually just finished a reread earlier today) and the you were my rock never my stepping stone series (my roman empire is that little “no” next to complete on the series page…. if you do ever write a part 4 i may cry).

anyways! just needed to let you know how obsessed with your work i am. thank you for providing me with endless hours of good fic. just picture me as the gordon ramsay meme; finally some good fucking fic!

Thank you so so much! Gosh, it's crazy for any of my work to be thought of as someone's roman empire. 😂

I definitely CANNOT promise that this will ever be completed, but I once toyed with another part to that series about their wedding night, so please enjoy this snippet and the moodboard I made for it forever ago. (Though I may be rethinking Kate's outfit after seeing her in that incredible red and gold ensemble...)

--

Marriage had been so many things to Anthony over the years.

As a child, a given – marriage and kids were just what people did, especially Edmund and Violet, by far the most enamored couple among all his friends’ parents. As a teenager, it was a burden, it was heartache, it was ghosts left behind. He swore to avoid it, convinced that one of his brothers – or hell, his sisters – was perfectly capable of carrying on the Bridgerton name.

And then, Kate.

It was too easy to want her, too easy to want things with her that he’d dismissed years ago. Maybe the moment he pieced together that he loved her, he knew he would marry her, too. He wanted a marriage with her, a commitment to her, and if Kate hadn’t wanted the same, Anthony was sure he would have gone the rest of his life without ever considering it again.

But she had wanted it. She said yes at Daphne’s party as he desperately laid out his hopes for the future, and she said yes again when he dropped to one knee a few months later to make it official, and she said yes five hours ago when the officiant asked Kate to bind her life to his.

And now Kate was his wife, his partner, though if Anthony was being honest, she’d been both of those things in his mind for much longer.

“It’s rude to stare,” Kate said, a touch of amusement in her voice.

[rosemary-bells]

okay so i. um. coughs. i f. i finall y read the luke anny ssr card story. voice acting and all. and. i. h. hoo boy.

i'm just gonna go in and start screaming for a few paragraphs maybe possibly. im not one to review things at all but whatever i have like a hundred years worth of things to say. i was gonna go n post abt this as i read but then i was like na h ill just make a bunch of memes and cry later

like first part(s) of the story i was already screaming and crying over that flashback where hes arguing w aaron. highkey i was like bro is this rly the time to tell luke to make this romantic. rly. then later on it was nothing but sadness and heartache and crying and i was like yknow what maybe he was right about this

first meme! i saw peanut and i was like oh m y god. my little boy. my baby. hes back. highkey i miss the kid. he's not present enough in luke stories lmao. the fact that luke styled the lil handle on peanut was. hooo. i was like man i cant believe this is the perfect man maybe? (im kidding. hes far from perfect but he is baby.)

also highkey during his classical music lore session i was like "lmao shouldve made it fur elise" and then i was like Hm. i also highkey love the fact that they changed the music for the music box bits. that was cute. love that they used the main theme on the default card screen too. very nice

every time he mentioned larping schumann or brahms i was like man is this rly the time lmao. altho i am happy it brought him resolution

meme two i dont have that many memes again most of this is just me ranting for a bit. the voice acting was literally peak though. every time he yelled, or even every time he was quiet, you could really get all that hesitation and heartbreak, all at once. it was amazing. it was heartaching. loved it. i cant speak for the other dubs since i use jpn but like. i bet they were. immaculate.

also highkey im still so miffed that they didnt give rosa voice acting. i could rant abt this for hours but to keep it short, like. mhy is always at its strongest when its not making a self-insert, yknow? in some cases, self-insert characters work, but when your choices don't matter too much, in an otome game, which are mostly character driven, trying to make her too basic is just kind of eh ig. she does get a pretty solid character from what we have, though. like, shes got a strong personality. very passionate abt justice to the point of embarrassment. very honest. is generally driven a bit more by her heart than her brain. like seafood. that sort of thing. she's already her own character, so i just wish they gave her a va. its gotten to the point in which ive literally started imagining a va for her. she kind of sounds like shirayuki (jpn) in my mind...

also man fr he really did think that romantic partners were the only way to receive proper emotional support. she has friends, man. she's a strong kid who you left for like, 8 years. have some faith in her, yknow? also god, that line where he was like "As long as he can make you happy." god. that just stung, man. im thinking abt him in other routes and like, 3/4 times he really just gave up, didn't he?

on that note i also thought the towel that he was using to dry her hair was just. on top of her head the entire time, so thinking abt all these dramatic scenes w her just doing that was funny. ik thats not how it worked but like still. also did she rly run to her parent's house in that outfit? in the storm? ik she wasnt thinking but oof dude shes gonna catch the worst cold after all this blows over

that kiss scene though. man. the orchestra music playing. i always love that theme, even if it does feel mis-timed at moments. it just feels so refreshing. rly does make it feel like a "kiss of fervor" (also how he just caresses her arm during the kiss. how gentle. what a sweet guy. he rly just wants to comfort her.) he even used 大好き instead of just 好き like man. ... man.

and then that bit where they called each other their greatest treasure... and then, how he said "I swear, I will do everything I can to live, so that I can be with you." man. it was cheesy but it rly did feel like the rainbow after the storm. it rly is all abt learning to love yourself because of how loved you are. like wow. man. it rly is abt loving someone so much that you want to live for them. live w them. man.

all in all, super cheesy card. it was a short-ish storyline, but i highkey loved it. it was cute. it was precious. i nearly cried. (more or less did when i found out his badge was called "Luke's Vow" like hooo. oh my god) i Enjoy. looking forward to the 2nd anny's cards....

the final meme. its another version of the last one but hey accurate lmao i was shaking crying screaming sobbing throwing up the entire time but by god was my heart full

[vegalocity]

Hug while straddling for @purble-turble's Time Travel Red and MK?

Affection meme

31. Hugging While straddling partner

Eyyyy lmao I'm always down to talk about Red Son: Ultimate Enemy as told by @purble-turble

--

There was no such thing as 'loving mental illness away'.

That was one of the very first things Qi Xiaotian had internalized when he came to the decision to make up with Red Son after his future adventure.

He wasn't exactly the picture of mental health himself, but when Red Son stumbled back into their time period, jacket chopped in half hair shorn close to his head and so obviously choking back tears, He'd instantly known whatever had happened to him had been actual hell. (Of course at first he'd forced himself to not care for how angry he'd been with Red Son after he'd told him about his parents plan and how he'd been a willing pawn in it, but that was beside the point)

So once he'd been properly brought upt to date on the exacts of the nightmare-future, and they'd started the process of looking for a therapist for Red Son, as clearly, he'd needed it, Xiaotian had taken it upon himself to do some research on his own time. it was a little difficult, he didn't want Red to find out about it until he actually had a better sense of what he should be doing, but since Red Son rarely seemed to be able to sleep anymore (even when Xiaotian could get him to lay with him in bed it was clear what little sleep he did get was rife with nightmares) and when he did sleep through the night he would wake up earlier than him, and they lived together... his most constant time for research was usually when he was technically on the clock.

But he'd gotten a couple of books about Post-traumatic stress disorder, general psychology, and 'So you've got a loved one with severe depression' (an actual title) and he'd scribble notes into the margins and on sticky notes when there was time between deliveries. And the first lesson every single one of those books had for him was just that.

You can't 'love someone out of their illness'. That's not a thing. The best you can do is love them through it.

So he did his best with that.

On some days that was just sending texts full of cute animal gifs and heart emojis, on some that was coming up to the loft on break to sit next to the lump of pillows and blankets on the bed and (after finding the telltale hint of short red hair that gave away where his head was) resting a hand on the part of the lump that was most likely an arm, gently rubbing it, and sitting in silence until his break ended.

And on some days it was this.

"It's not safe you're not safe I'm gonna slip up eventually-" Red Son's voice was fragile and warbling as his actions contradicted his words, hands scrabbling up and down his back and sides, gripping periodically for purchase before shrinking back as if afraid just hugging him back would crush him. "I'm gonna do something-"

"You won't." Xiaotian was practically seated in Red Son's lap at this point. Red had been sitting on the floor, back to the edge of the bed when the meltdown had begun, so kneeling on the ground until he was rested on his partners legs did two things:

one, it enabled him to wrap him up as tight as he could in his arms without having to twist one or both of them in an awkward angle.

and two, the extra pressure would probably help ground him, make it a little easier to come down from this one.

"You don't know that" His voice was hoarse, desperate. and Xiaotian closed his eyes and squeezed Red Son tighter.

"I do. I know you, hun." Red Son sobbed into his shoulder and he felt his hands finally decide where to be, resting across either shoulder blades and balling the fabric they found there up into fists.

"I know there's basically nothing that'll make you believe it at this point, but you're a good man, Red Son."

"I'm no-"

"Shhh, my turn to talk now." he shifted a hand to be able to bury it in Red Son's hair. He could feel him ever so minutely relax beneath him at the sensation. "You saw your potential for being a bad person, and don't forget everyone's got it. I have it, Xiaojiao has it, hell Monkey King has recorded evidence for his bad person potential, anyway, you saw yours and you've been working your ass off nonstop to keep it from ever getting the best of you.

"And this shit is fucking hard, hun. You're fighting your own brain and the actual literal future here! and guess what? it might not feel like it right now but you're winning."

Still, he shook his head against Xiaotian's shoulder. he didn't want to interrupt again, but still make his disagreement known.

"You are." He pulled away just enough to be able to properly cup Red Son's wet face in his hands. "You think that Evil King remotely hacked Jin and Yin's stupid battle robot in that illegal mech fighting ring and made it throw the match making them look like idiots in his timeline?" Red's gaze broke from his own as he thought back on the fight that broke out the week previous.

"....I suppose not-"

"You think that Evil King ever thinks for more than a second about the ethics of what evil plans he carries out let alone hours of agonizing over whether something was the right call or not?"

"Certainly not but that's not-"

"It is the point, Red. You're not the same person anymore. Maybe you started from the same roots, but he dug himself back into the ground and you rose up like a fucking tree instead."

Red Son met his gaze again, and Xiaotian could tell he still didn't believe him, but there was a spark there.

The faintest, dimmest hope.

"You are a good man, Red Son." this time he made sure every word was careful deliberate. So there was no misunderstandings that could be made. "And I am not accepting counterarguments at this time so you'd better fucking take it."

When he pulled Red Son against his chest again, and let the demon continue to cry quietly into his shirt, he pressed a small kiss to the crown of his head.

"I love you."

Red Son choked on a sob, and didn't answer.

It wasn't an issue, he knew Red Son loved him. Part of this whole thing being a thing in the first place was because Red Son loved him. Red Son wouldn't be as scared of becoming the Evil King as he was if he didn't love him so he knew better than to take to heart the days where he just couldn't say the words back.

There weren't any cures for mental illnesses. There were ways to mitigate the symptoms, but there are no spells that cure depression, there's no potion of anti-PTSD, and no person can love someone out of their illness.

But heavens above did he wish it some days.

He'd give anything to make it so Red Son wouldn't have to be in so much pain.

But all he could do was just hold him tighter, and stroke the short red tresses between his fingers until the sobbing stopped.

It took less time than usual.

Red was exhausted and pliant by the end of it and let Xiaotian drag him about the loft, obediently (if slowly) eating what was pressed into his hands and then nursing the mug of tea he was given as they settled down on the mound of cushions and he put on that 'how things are made' show that Red Son liked.

He was asleep halfway through the second episode.

Sure, some days were harder than others, and sure, some days he'd wish there was a cure just to spare Red the suffering.

But he felt Red Son's head slowly loll to the side until it rested on his shoulder, breathing slow and even and looking for the first time today like he was at peace and-

He still wouldn't trade it for anything.

"Love You, Hun."

Red Son hummed against him.

--

Send me stuff!

[simp-for-mha-men]

𝕤𝕥𝕒𝕥𝕦𝕤: 𝕠𝕟𝕝𝕚𝕟𝕖 (𝕕𝕖𝕟𝕜𝕚 𝕜𝕒𝕞𝕚𝕟𝕒𝕣𝕚 𝕩 𝕣𝕖𝕒𝕕𝕖𝕣)

A/N: My first piece of writing! I hope that all of you enjoy it. I LOVE IT! (also a Denki stan, so ya know) I totally believe Denki is the kinda person to create friends only AND in person. Without further ado, here ya go.

Genre: fluffy fluff with mutual pining 💞

Word count: 2.3k

♥*♥*♥*♥*♥*♥*♥*♥*♥*♥*♥*♥*♥*♥

itzElectric has joined the chat

itzElectric: HEAR YE! HEAR YE! I SUMMON MY COMPANION @IceStorm TO CURE MY BOREDOM!

Denki Kaminari was once again on his phone, searching for the person who he began talking to only months ago in a future-hero chatroom. He remembered he slid into IceStorm’s DMs with a cheesy pick-up line: Do you know how much a polar bear weighs? Enough to break the ice. A classic one-liner he hoped wouldn’t scare the person on the other side of the screen away.

IceStorm ended up responding to the DM almost immediately, commenting on how the Titanic wouldn’t appreciate that opener. Denki knew from that simple reply that he and IceStorm were going to get along just fine.

IceStorm, whose name he later found out was (y/n), was an all around perfect human being. Seriously, they were. Denki swore to the Bakusquad that if you looked up the definition of perfect in the dictionary, (y/n)’s tag would be next to it.

Their quirk related to the online name they chose for themselves. The fact that they could not only produce ice from their body but also turn any bodies of water, like clouds or lakes, into ice was fascinating to the electric boy. He, in turn, shared his quirk with (y/n). He even sent a video of himself in full “Dumb Denki” mode, to which he received an audio clip of them laughing hysterically as a reply.

The two online friends shared everything with each other. When (y/n) broke up with their first boyfriend, they talked with Denki the entire night over voice chat. When Denki started doubting himself and his placement in UA’s hero course, the future ice hero immediately gave him a million reasons on why he was going to become a great hero.

It took Chargebolt only 3 months to realize that he had developed feelings for his online friend after sending that fateful DM. He couldn’t tell (y/n) though. No way. If he did, they would probably block him, maybe even delete their account and create a new one just to get away from him for good.

How did this happen you might ask? Well, it began when (y/n) and Denki found out they were the same age. They also both wanted to become pro-heroes, obviously. Plus, all of their interests lined up with each other. It was as if fate pulled them both together through an internet connection and an obsession with Tik Tok memes.

Snapping out of his trance, Denki realized he had been zoning out for a few minutes to recount how he met his current crush. He was so head-over-heels for a person he had only ever heard and not seen that he didn’t even check if IceStorm was online.

Doing just what his brain thought of, he clicked IceStorm’s profile in his friends list and saw what he wished to see the most. Next to a green dot read the words Status: Online, making Denki’s heart rate speed up just a bit.

Instead of waiting for more time to pass, and considering it was almost 2 AM on a Friday night, he DMed the ice maker.

itzElectric: hey.....you lowkey left me hangin in the main chat 😔

He hoped, prayed, and wished that (y/n) would respond. He wanted his partner in crime. His meme expert. His muse. He wanted another audio clip of them singing songs horribly off-key or laughing at another ridiculously stupid Tik Tok. He wanted his heart to flutter in his chest just a bit more. He wanted to feel them in person. He wanted...no, needed to video chat with (y/n).

They had known each other for a total of 8 months, and graduation was coming up for the both of them. If he could video chat with (y/n), maybe he could work up the courage and ask to meet them at the café near U.A. It had the best pastries, something that he knew they would love.

itzElectric: something up? you know you can tell me anything 

Very rarely did it take you more than a couple of seconds to respond to the blonde. It worried him. What if something had happened? What if you were doubting yourself? What if you had gotten injured? What if you were--

Suddenly, his phone vibrated. He never had picked it up faster in his life. As he looked down at the message he had just sent, he felt his face heat up slightly when he read your response.

IceStorm: nah nothing’s wrong. was someone worried about me? lol 🥴

He was so happy you couldn’t see his blushing face. However, little did he know the reason you didn’t meet him in the chat room was because you were thinking about what to say. Also, you were blushing as well.

Going to Shiketsu was a big deal, and you never wanted to get distracted. When you met itzElectric online, everything changed. You began developing feelings. It was an issue, but it was a very, very good issue. You had never seen his face. All you wanted to do was video chat with him. If you could video chat with Denki, maybe you could work up the courage and ask to meet him at the café near U.A. It had the best frappes, something that you knew he would love.

You felt your heart rate pick up when Denki responded to your previous message.

itzElectric: obviously. if you died or something, who would make me feel better about myself? 👉🏻👈🏻🥺

Denki began questioning his latest reply. It sounded clingy, he thought. He might as well have just dug his own grave. Who would say something like that?

IceStorm: awwww is my bb giving me a compliment 💘

Your heart soared with emotion. This man, separated by a screen, was your world. You could never have him, though. If you did, he would get freaked out. Besides, you knew he was a flirt with how many pick-up lines he got your opinion on. 

itzElectric: well.....since your online, i wanted to ask you something kinda important

Denki knew he shouldn’t be typing anything to them. He knew that this could make or break their entire relationship. In a couple minutes, he might be blasting The One That Got Away by Katy Perry and crying. Despite this, he waited for (y/n)’s reply.

IceStorm: sure. what’s up?

itzElectric: i feel like we have a pretty strong connection....so can we maybe see each other

You might as well have gone into cardiac arrest. This man, the man you’ve had a crush for 4 months, just asked you to meet him. Or was it a video chat request? Maybe just pictures? You needed clarification before you freaked out even more.

IceStorm: what do you mean? like in person or....?

Denki froze. In person? YOU wanted to meet HIM in person? That did not catch him off guard. No, totally not. It punched, kicked, and threw him off guard. That wasn’t suppose to happen. He wanted to video chat then meet up with you. Could this happen out of order?

IceStorm: yo....pika? gonna answer me? 

The electric boy typed before his brain could tell him to stop what he was doing.

itzElectric: can you video chat right now?

He wanted exactly what you wanted. The months of banter over chat and stupid voice memos led up to this, but you couldn’t believe it. The two of you could never be together. Denki had to have a girlfriend or boyfriend. There’s no way a catch like him would still be single. Still, you typed your response out immediately.

IceStorm: yes

Your phone began vibrating profusely due to the incoming call. In the moment, you forgot to turn on any lights. Leaping out of your bed, you scrambled to turn on the lamp that was on your desk. You then turned on the one next to the bed. Then, you did the unthinkable: you answered the call.

When the phone stopped ringing, Denki saw you. Oh my All Might.....why didn’t he do this sooner? He was floored by your looks. You were even better than perfect. Your face held a soft expression that made him turn almost as red as a tomato. Your hair complemented the irises of your eyes beautifully. It was as if you weren’t even human. You were just an angel visiting him for a brief moment.

You were seeing him in the same light. His blonde hair and bright yellow eyes made a fire ignite in your heart. He held a goofy grin, one you had imagined many nights before falling asleep. However, you were very far off. His entire persona was fixated in that grin. It was absolutely phenomenal.

“Hi,” you started, letting out a breath you didn’t even realize you were holding.

“Hey,” he responded.

Denki was speechless. You were enamored. This was everything you both wanted.

“So,” you began, “should I call you Denki or itzElectric?”

“Whatever you want.”

Denki wasn’t using his brain anymore. It was as if he short-circuited himself without using his quirk. He was responding to everything you said from his heart. It was all out of love for you.

You giggled a bit, bringing the electricity user back to his senses.

“Why all of this suddenly?” you questioned.

“I wanted to see you.”

“Really?”

“No. I,” Denki paused and inhaled, “I needed to see you. To hear you. To just be with you.”

Your face became flushed as if you had been training for the past 5 hours. The guy you had fallen so hard for needed to see you? He wasn’t acting flirty or overly comedic. He was peaceful and had a glint in his eye. Could it be--?

“D-dude! You can’t just s-say things like that,” you stammered in the best voice possible.

Denki was whipped for you. He glanced at the clock and realized it was 2:18. He needed to be up at 7 for a morning run with Kirishima. He’s run on no sleep before from talking to you all night, but tomorrow was going to be a strenuous training day. He had to get everything off of his chest.

“Listen,” Denki said, “(y/n), I really--”

“N-no. Just w-wait a minute,” you cut in.

Two very different emotions coursed through you both. You felt a sense of purpose, bordering on the edge of extreme shyness. Denki felt nervous, bile already threatening his throat.

“I like you,” you stated.

His eyes grew the size of dinner plates. You did not just say that. He just had too much caffeine before bed. Wait, he didn’t have anything with caffeine before bed. 

“L-like as m-more than a friend. You’re really cool, and I want to see you,” you ended.

When you realized he hadn’t said anything, you panicked. Trying to cover up your embarrassment, you just started spewing out word vomit.

“You know what? Forget I said anything. It’s clear that you are totally not ready to talk about that. I mean you probably have someone else in mind, right? I’m not the best looking. My jokes are subpar. I mean, I’m not even that confi--”

“In person?”

“Wait...what?”

“Do you want to see me in person?” Denki asked.

He was floored. The person, who he had feelings for, liked him back. For the first time in his life, the pick-up lines and corny jokes worked. He was truly himself and still got the prize: love.

“Yes,” you replied. “I really, really want to see you in person.”

“You can on one condition.”

You tilted your head, clearly confused by his statement. He chuckled at this and continued talking.

“You have to let me hold your hand.”

“What?”

“I like you too, IceStorm.”

Your online username coming out of his mouth made you smile so wide. It also could’ve been the fact that the guy you fell so hard for reciprocated your feelings.

“Want to meet at the café near your school on Sunday? At around 1?” you blurted, hoping that wouldn’t be too soon for him.

“Absolutely. Speaking of which,” he began, “I need to test out my newest pick-up line.”

You rolled your eyes, faking distaste, but on the inside, you wanted nothing more than to hear it. After all, he felt the same way about you. It was bound to make your heart soar even more now.

“Do you like coffee?” he smirked. “Because I like you a latte.”

You couldn’t help bursting out in laughter and blushing profusely. He, in turn, laughed with you and felt butterflies in his stomach. This continued for a couple of minutes before both of you could catch your breaths and refocus yourselves on the conversation.

You were ecstatic. He was elated. You actually did it. You admitted your feelings to the one guy you never thought you could have. You were everything to him. He would electrocute the whole world just for you to smile if necessary. It was as if fate had finally done its job.

Forgetting about his morning run with Kirishima, Denki started a new conversation about the latest Tik Tok he saw. You replied with your usual sarcasm to which he pretended to be mortified by your opinion.

It went on for hours. The two of you were genuinely happy. Hopefully, Denki would ask you on a date soon. Maybe, you might have to, but who knows.

Suddenly, in the midst of talking about plans after high school, a knock sounded on Denki’s door. He glanced at the clock and realized it was Kirishima.

“Be out in few!” he yelled, jumping out of bed.

He threw his phone down, which still had the call going, and got dressed at lightning speed. Once you had calmed down from laughing at his urgency, he picked up the phone and said something you’ll never forget.

“I’ll see you soon, my wonderful snowflake. Zapping out!”

[charbax]

A Conversation with Death

Long ago, Tobias Foxtrot made a gamble. Decades later, a man called Malcolm Graves makes the same bet. A spoopy Hallowing AU for TF/Graves.

A/N: Warnings for blood and injury. Title came from an American folk song of the same name. I'm particularly fond of Jen Titus ''O death' version, as I had listened to it A LOT while writing this. Yes, it's from Supernatural. No, I've never seen the show, but I know Enough to meme on it. 

Link to AO3 here!!

-

O’ Death,

Won’t you spare me over another year?

Well what is this, that I can’t see?

With icy hands, getting hold of me?

Well I am Death, none can excel,

I open the door to Heaven or Hell.

Time was difficult to parse in the Mist, but when its darkened edges started ebbing and flowing beyond the isles’ shores, he knew it was that time of the year, when the sun’s eclipse was starting, and the Mist’s power became more powerful with the waning daylight. There was nothing else to do but follow it across the seas.

As it crept over the dark waves, he can feel himself gathering, solidifying, taking form of his favoured gambler’s coat and adorned hat. His deck of cards manifested in his hand as well, the wails and screams singing sweetly between his fingertips as he twirled a card. When he finally manifested, he glanced down and saw a rowboat, missing its oars. In it was a man lying on his back with his arms slack at his sides, as if he was in a coffin, but blood bloomed on his shirt instead of flowers. The spectre only gave him a once-over – no use if the man was already gone – but before he moved on, he saw the chest rise and fine, however minutely.

Ah, so this one’s a fighter. This would make an excellent addition to his collection.

He let himself descend onto the lip of the boat and perched gracefully, not even causing the smallest of rocking. The man must’ve sensed the cold of the spirit, because he cracked open an eye to peer at the ghost. “If you’re here to take me back to jail,” He rasped. “Then you’ll have to take me back in a casket.”

Twisted Fate allowed a chuckle. "No mortal, but a worse fate befalls you, for you are in the Black Mists of Shadow Isles."

"Reckoned normal fog doesn't look this dark and menacing." He drawled back.

"Still so full of spark. You're taking this dying thing very well."

A grimaced shrug. "My life can't get any weirder than talking to a ghost right now."

Oh, he liked this one. Most mortals would've started cowering in terror by now, or begging for their lives. This man, however, had grumbled and glared out at him, as if Twisted Fate had simply disturbed his drink at the bar instead of coming to claim his soul. The spectre said, "I like you mortal. What's your name?"

The man narrowed his eyes, but answered regardless, "Graves. Malcolm Graves."

"A fitting name, Malcolm Graves. Would you like to make a wager?"

Graves' brow furrowed, but his beady eyes glittered. "...what kind?"

"A game of aces. You win, you get a life of riches beyond your imagination.  I win, I get to keep your soul for eternity."  He extended a hand. "We got a deal?"

Graves eyed the hand, then T.F's face, before cautiously shaking it. "On one condition: you tell me your name."

Fair enough. "I am Twisted Fate now." He pulled back, helping Graves to sit up. Wisps of glowing light left their palms, the residue vitality fading into the night like fireflies. It wasn't enough to save him, no, just enough that he could breathe and play without doubling over in pain. It showed on Graves' face when he sat upright proper with only minimal wincing. Twisted Fate sat down on the opposite bench and set out his cards between them, souls crying out ever so sweetly. A taste of Graves' doom.

"So," Twisted Fate started. "Feelin' lucky?"

-

"Feeling lucky?"

Tobias Foxtrot shivered - he was only allowed a small raft and the clothes on his back when he was exiled, which was no match for the autumn sea's turbulent  winds. Gooseflesh rippled along his skin, but at least, trying to comfort himself, it was from the cold night, and not from the apparition in front of him, holding out a pack of cards. Tobias took them with forced languidness. "I've got shuffling rights, I presume?"

The spectre nodded. Tobias' nimble fingers made quick work of the deck before he dealt them out, grinning with bravado he didn't feel.

-

"You do this for every man you run into?" Graves muttered, breaking the silence.

It had been an interesting few minutes since the cards had been dealt and they looked at their respective hands. A few quiet minutes too, only with minimal grunting or hums from either of them. Plenty of staring though, as Fate eyed over the man currently frowning at the set of cards. He was rough, beard and moustache grown uncontempt, but Fate assumed it had once been groomed into something magnificent, once upon a time. His clothes were in disarray as well, bloodstains aside. Simple and grey. Prison-clothes.

Anyways, he should be saying yes, when there's a soul to add to his growing collection. "Only for the handsome ones." Was what he said instead.

Graves glared from behind his fan of cards. "Did any of them win?"

"Now where would be the fun in telling you that?"

Graves drew a card and laid it down. "That only tells me that no-one did."

T.F hummed thoughtfully and decided to indulge. "No, there have been people. Rare occurrences, but occurrences nonetheless."

Graves frowned at that, his jaw grinding as if chewing an invisible cigar. Thinking tic or frustration tic?  Fate leaned on his open palm, smirking when he saw Graves' eyes follow the movement. "How do you like your odds?"

"Now," Graves started, one side of his impressive moustache twitching up. "Where would be the fun in telling you that?"

-

This was still winneable, Tobias thought to himself. Not desperately, of course, lest it show on his face.

The first card was a like start of a bad omen, or the first card in a terrible tarot spread. None of his cards, hidden or otherwise, would win him this round. With a sigh, he spread out his cards.

"Your hand's not looking good so far, Riverchild?" His opponent said.

Tobias scowled at both the offending cards and at the spectre. He hadn't been welcomed back to the river in years. "I don't take kindly to that title. I'm not one, not anymore."

"There's a story behind that I'd imagine."

"There is. Doesn't mean I'm mighty wanting to retell it."

A whisper of laughter, in the wind or from the ghost sitting opposite of him? "Then what would you like to be referred to as then?"

Tobias looked at him in the ghastly, sunken, eyes. "The man who outplayed death."

-

It was close now - Twisted Fate can feel the Black Mist starting its ebb back to the Isles' moors. That, and their scores were currently neck to neck, down to the last hand of the last round. Twisted Fate didn't have much time left before the Harrowing was over. Amazing, that hours seemed to have flown by like seconds, interspersed with quips and jabs, each one more lighter than the last. By the end, they have been grinning like old friends, or perhaps, partners in the cahoots, and an idea was forming in T.F's mind, as solid and sharp as the card hidden in his sleeve.

For now, he hid his smirk behind his fan of cards. "So it comes down to this then. Y'trust your hand?"

Graves' eyes met his own straight on. "As much as you trust your own."

The fog watches, a shapeless audience, humming with excitement. At the exact same time, they laid down their cards.

Twisted Fate's smirk fell off his face as he stared not one, but two aces, one on each side. He and Graves glanced at each other in righteous surprise.

"I'd say one of us is a right scoundrel." Twisted Fate said, but his voice held no accusation, only mirth.

Suddenly, Graves' arm shot forward, gripping T.F's arm. The ace slipped out of the card sharp's sleeve before he could catch himself.

"Ha!" Graves said with triumph. "You're a cheat!"

With deft fingers, Fate pulled into Graves' sleeve to pull out an offending card. "Takes one to know one then."

They stared at each other in a silent contest of wills, their faces close enough for their breaths to mingle in the cold air. The fog grew even thicker around them in anticipation, like the captive spectators leaning forwards in their seats to see who would throw the first punch. There was no sound except for the lapping of water against the boat.

Then T.F tossed his head back and laughed. He laughed and laughed and laughed.

When it finally died down, Graves was looking at him in curious suspicion.

"No-one's ever tried to out-trick the trickster." Twisted Fate wheezed out.  He was still grinning. "So I suppose we both won. I get to keep your soul,"

"Now wait a minute-"

"And you get your wealth."

Graves' bushy eyebrows knitted together oh so lovely as he frowned. "I'm not getting it."

"Oh, you will eventually." Twisted Fate said. He pulled Graves closer again, slipping his ace from his sleeve.

Then with it, he neatly sliced Graves' throat.

He didn't even make it hurt like he normally would - he gently laid Graves down as the man gurgled out blood and indignation, cradling his head like a lover's. Graves managed to look angry even as the life bled of him, as if he was simply annoyed about the situation rather than fearful, and Fate simply smiled back at him. As the light faded from Graves' dark eyes, emerald-coloured wisp floated from his lips, curling around the bloodied card, glowing intently for a moment, before fading into a dull shine. Fate grinned down at it, then tucked it into his vest's breast pocket.

The night was almost over. He could feel it in the way the fog rolled back towards the the Black Isles, the inevitable pull on every particle like a thousand strings, the way the other beings of the Harrowing howled their way back home. Just like them, he twirled a different card now between his fingers, spinning it faster and faster, until the air threatened to snap underneath the pressure.

And then he was gone.

-

Tobias stared at the other ace, a perfect copy down to the wear and tear on the fraying edges. The waters were still now, as smooth as glass, and the fog was glancing off it like smoke. Tobias didn't even dare to breathe as he watched for the spectre's  reaction.

He might be worse than dead.

The ghost continued staring at the twin Aces as Tobias continued holding his breath. Then, the spectre spoke,

"It seems that we have both won and lost."

Tobias gulped. The apparition ignored it. "I'm a man of my word," He continued. "You'll get your riches well enough."

Tobias frowned. "At the cost of my life? Doesn't sound worth it, if I'm not alive to enjoy them."

"There's  a different type of riches than you know of, mortal." The  phantom grinned and raised his scythe. "And you will have all of time to know them."

-

He was getting better at telling when it was the Harrowing time. He was faster at solidifying himself this time, managing to complete his form just as the moon peeked over the horizon on the seas. His pack of cards flicked themselves over his fingers, more reassuring than any rosary beads, as he watched, and waited.

Soon enough, another form materialised next to him. It may have been a year, but it would take much longer for him to forget that furry frown when the other spirit formed next to him.

"Damned cold here." Graves grumbled. He chose to wear a nice, thick serape, in a deep red. He fiddled with his cigar, lighting it, and it shone like a beacon in the dark. "Is it like this every year?"

"Stick around and find out." Twisted Fate answered back. Already, he could feel the edges of the mist creeping over the waves, further than last year's. T.F made to follow them, then turned around to face the other apparition. "You comin'?"

Graves shrugged. "Got nothin' better to do than scam a few mortals of their lives, do I?"

"It's always better with a partner in crime." Twisted Fate smirked, extending his hand. After a moment, Graves grinned at him and took it. And together they made their way to the unfortunates lost in the Black Mist.

Because after all, what was more valuable than a soul?

-

The old, the young, the rich or poor All alike to me you know. No wealth, no land, no silver no gold Nothing satisfies me but your soul.

O, Death, Won't you spare me over til another year?

[yourusualfangirlstuff]

Just a little something to share. Hi, I'm YouFa

I've always liked to write, either fanfiction or just stories in general... And I wanted to try something, it's been a while since I've been on Tumblr. So, here we go:

This little angst/fluff one-shot is called: "Off wherever you want to go" ft. you and your comfort character.

"Oh well, this is the last box." You said with a tint of sadness in your voice. You were almost away from home, moving out since a small job request, had been handed to you weeks ago.

Your job involved doing what you loved the most, it just wasn't a chance you could let go. Yet, as much as you wanted to stay hyped up, you couldn't much.

You just missed them. A lot.

The last time you knew about them, you gave them the news about moving away, they seemed relaxed about it, but after that, they were gone. And hadn't heard about them, for a while now.

Deep down, it upset you, but it couldn't distract you from what your main goal was: Getting on the top. Being the #1.

The van you had hired for the moving, was already full with your stuff and the kind old man —the driver—, was just as happy as you.

"Ready to go, young one?" he asked in his raspy voice. You were looking at the end of your street, still expecting for them to show up and stopping you from going. You sighed, looked at the wrinkled one, nodding.

You got in the passenger side and him, behind the wheel, strapping on his seat belt. Your family was waving at you, and you couldn't help, but tear it a little.

The vehicle started, and off you were, to the greatest adventure of your life... Alone... It made you sigh through your nostrils, slouching on the seat.

"What is in your mind, young lad?" he asked. You turned to them, with your eyebrows raised and looking to the front once again.

"Oh, well, it's nothing, sir. Just... Remembering things." you replied and smiled sadly at them.

He chuckled and shook his head. "It's for someone, isn't it?"

Your cheeks flared up and you looked away.

"Nah. Someone? No, sir. At all" you tried to lie, but he patted your shoulder.

"Love gets us all, sometimes. It did with me, and my loved one" he replied. He searched quickly in his pocket and pulled out an infantile-sized picture of him and his partner, handing it to you.

"It's adorable. I like it" you said and held the picture between your index and thumb.

Suddenly, the man passed over a street bump, making you drop the tiny photo.

"Oh shoot. Sorry" you said and since you didn't have your seat belt, you simply bent over to pick it up.

You ran your fingers through the van's rug, to look for the man's little photo and with no warning, the vehicle stopped, making you crash your forehead against the dashboard.

You groaned in pain and rubbed your head, turning rather confused at him.

"I am terribly sorry! It's just that this wacko stepped in the middle of the road!" he angrily yelled, and peeked his head outside the window.

He honked several times and you turned your head to the weirdo... You knew that weirdo. It was your weirdo.

They were standing there, with a very worried look, as if they were about to cry.

You got off the car and walked towards them, pissed off.

"What in the heck are you doing!? We almost ran over you!" you frowned at them. The action, made your head twirl and hurt. You just pressed your hand against your forehead, still trying to rub away the pain.

"Are you alright? What happened?" they asked, very worried. Their hands were approaching your face when you moved them off, in a swift movement.

"Don't. Please, don't" you coldly said and they were taken aback since you'd never treated them like that.

"Where were you?" you asked. They opened up their mouth and closed it up, again.

"Look, I know I was away for a while-" "A while!? Just a while?!" you cut them off. They gulped at this, they'd never seen you this angry.

"You were gone long enough to make me miss you and even cry for you! You were just... Gone! No calls, no messages, nothing!" you expressed it all, your hands doing motions.

Their lips thinned up and they were thinking their words carefully, still not saying anything.

"Well?" you crossed your arms over your chest, your brow still furrowed.

"I... I'm thinking" they replied and you scoffed, turning away, and walking back to the transportation.

"Wait wait-!" they said and you turned back to them, with a raised eyebrow.

"I just... Don't know what to tell you" they mumbled.

"How about the truth? Why were you gone so long? Where were you?" you asked and they sighed in defeat.

"I was gone, because... Aside from getting upset about seeing you go, I also pulled some string around... So I could be with you." they explained.

"I... Don't get it. What do you mean?" you tilted your head.

"I want to be with you. Here or anywhere... But just us. You and I." they approached you and grabbed your hands, squeezing them.

Your face was puzzled in confusion. They chuckled and pulled you closer.

"I think we can be together... If you want to, in the same space," they mumbled and pressed their forehead against yours.

"Of course I want to. It'd be wonderful" you whispered back and looked at them in the eyes.

"Then, let's do it. Let's stay here, and have a new life" and with that said, your face dropped and you walked back.

"Wait... Here? At hometown?" you asked and they nodded.

"... I can't," you said and their face dropped as well.

"Why not?" they asked and you bit your lip.

"I got my dream job. Waiting for me, across the state. I'd have told you earlier but..." you shrugged.

"Oh. I'm sorry. I... I'm so sorry." they replied and you just approached them, patting their shoulder.

"I don't understand your reasons, but... Whatever it was, I'm glad I saw you, one last time." you smiled and walked away, once again.

You got in the passenger seat again, and the man looked at both of you, with a sad expression.

They were struggling with either stopping you or letting you go. They ran to your side's window and tapped on it, startling you a little. You rolled it down and rested on the edge with your elbows.

"Where are you going to be, then?" they asked, gripping one of your hands. You squeezed it back and kissed it.

"Remember that pretty place I always talked you about? The house I've always wanted to have? I got it. And, you're very welcome, if you ever want to pass by" you smiled at them and they gave you a sad smile.

You wished you could take them with you, but you knew what they had to do and what you had to do. Each of you, on your own business.

They wanted to stay at hometown and you wanted to explore the around, more... Nothing wrong with that, but sure felt a little bit alone.

And off you were...

Three months later

It had been a while after your moving and you were doing just fine in your new workplace. A couple of friends were made but you couldn't help but think about them... Smile, laugh, eyes... Just everything.

You did talk through the phone or messages, sending eachother memes and ressuring messages, but it just wasn't the same.

You were almost out of work and you were very tired. It had been a long day but it was all worth it, for the payment.

You recieved a text message from them.

"Hey, are you almost out?" you smiled at your phone

"Yeah, I'm crossing outside righ now." you texted as you walked out the building.

And you froze when you looked up at your phone. They were right there. You blinked a couple of times and approached slowly.

"What...? How?" you stuttered out and they hugged you tightly. You hugged them back and inhaled slowly, exhaling and getting their scent in your nostrils.

"I moved here, as well, right up the street. Now we can lunch and be together, more often. You keep doing your job and I keep doing mine" they said and pulled away from the hug.

You caressed their face with both of your hands and they kissed them, each. They squeezed their hands against yours and it made you laugh a little, couple of happy tears streaming down.

"Are you hungry? I'm starving." they said and you nodded in agreement.

"Where at?" you asked.

"Off wherever you want to be at. With you, it's great." they replied and you grabbed one of their hands, locking your fingers together, and looked where to get some lunch.

[monstaxdirtywonk]

Love Syndrome

Member : Wonho X reader

Genre : Fuff, some angst, some smut

Synopsis : A girl obsessed with Neurology takes an experiment on dating Hoseok, who has no idea this is a joke to her. Her experiment will turn against her when she’ll actually start falling in love...

 You weren't like the other girls. Maybe this will turn out to be one of those memes online but no, you truly meant it. As a kid, you despised dolls and castles, pink and unicorns. You showed a great interest in mechanics, cars (mostly destroying them and notice their parts), puzzles and balls. Truth be told, you were proud of yourself and how independent you grew to be. Your friends were crying every once in a while for that hottie blondie who broke up with them, while you did your best at comforting them. Relationships were an unnecessary drama, one you did not want to take part in. You’re fine the way you are! An academic career is in front of you, traveling the world and finally, being what you always wanted...a woman of logic, of sense, of credibility. No drama, no annoying clingy boyfriends, no crying sessions. No. No. No. You know what's best in life and that’s what’s your way. 

Your friend Val was over for support. There’s been a month since she broke up with the ex and still can’t let go. After hours of fake sentimentalism, you’ve had enough.

“You know what...I’ve got the perfect solution for you.”

Val raised her teary eyes and looked curiously to your side.

“You can get a dog! Yes that’s perfect, I should’ve thought about it sooner,

“okay thank you for trying to make me laugh but it’s not helping.”

“This isn’t a joke. it’s a real solution and a much more practical one than me just telling you sweet nonsense of ‘comfort’. Dogs, when in contact with humans, release a chemical in our brain called oxytocin, just like when you are with your partner. Instead of having the side effects and ups and downs of a relationship, a dog is much more devoted and drama free. Boom, you’ve got double win.”

“I swear sometimes I feel like you’re Sheldon from Big Bang theory in a female form.”

“Thank you for that compliment but I am not as good as the flawless mastermind Sheldon himself is.”

“You know what, Ima leave before we fight, the least thing I’m looking for is this.”

“Okay fine but think about it.”

You said as you made your way to the door along her. Val grinned and left without a second word. I mean you were right, even you thought of adopting a cute poodle. It’s much better than ‘adopting’ a boyfriend. Plus dogs are always happy when they see you. Maybe a dog is a good idea.

You checked the watch and it hit you.

“Damn, I’m late!” you exclaimed and took your purse heading out of the door.

----

‘When in love, you experience a rush of hormones to the brain — including oxytocin, the “love hormone,” the “pleasure hormone” dopamine, and sex hormones like estrogen and testosterone. ‘

You aren’t the type to believe in coincidences but if they exist, this can’t be one. Out of all those subjects, did they have to talk about love’s effect on the brain today? Unbelievable. But interesting at the same time, no wonder everyone’s so invested in this called ‘dating culture’.  

“Y/N, we’ll be in the cafeteria downstairs. Don’t be too late.”

“I won’t I promise.”

The proffessor looked at you intensely. You noticed and moved your head upwards.

“Actually I’ll close the class! Sorry about that but I have my lunch break.”

“Ah totally. I’m so sorry Mr.Jones for ‘eating your time away’” You laughed at your own pun and he did too.  

You slow-run to the exit and the moment you reached the door, you collided with someone and your books fell to the floor.

“Oh I’m sorry I can’t believe I’m so careless at times.” his voice, a sweet sound contrary to his muscular physique.

“No, it’s my mistake actually. I wasn’t looking straight, per usual.” he laughed and colected your books.

“I mean, you didn’t have to.”

“It’s the least I can do for bumbing into you like that. My Hulk self should be a little more careful since I might knock out someone.”

You laughed genuinely after a long time. He noiticed and smiled in satisfaction.

“So, you’re studying Neurology?”

“Ugh? Ah yes I do! It’s very interesting. Some might find it boring but it’s so exciting to learn about the wonder our body, our mind is.”

He was staring at you in awe. Probably thinking of you as a terrible nerd. Judging by his looks, he seemed the gym guy, totally off your valley.

‘I’m sorry. It gets boring for some.”

“No. Not at all. I admire those that are so passionate with what they’re doing. I would just like to add something more to your sentence.”

“...and what’s that?”

“the wonder our body, mind and soul is.”

Normally you’d think of it as lame. Actually it was cheesy but he is a pleasant surprise. It was unfair to judge him based on his looks after all.

“I guess.” you answered semi-sure.

“Now you might excuse me but I gotta go. It was nice talking to you.”

“Bye” you waved cringing at the silly child-like act.

----

The library was surprisingly empty for a uni with so many students. You took advantage and went there to study further for your upcoming exams. Suddenly a voice interrupted your train of thought and you were this close to cursing.

“Hey!” someone shout out in excitment, earning himself agressive shhs from the few students sitting there. He murmured a sorry and came your way. It was the guy that bumbed into you a couple of days before.  

“Hey” you answered as quietely as possible.

“So..” he said obviously nervous by his hand movements and red tint on his cheeks.

“I forgot to tell you my name and that was rude, wasn’t it?”

You didn’t answer because it wasn’t rude.

“I’m Hoseok.” he extended his arm for a hand shake.

You felt his pulse rising to dangerous vibrations. He was nervous for sure. Maybe you’re reading into it too much...

“Nice to meet you Hoseok, I’m Y/N.”

“You know I feel sorry to interrupt you but I’d like to offer you a drink, as a way to apologize.”

“You don’t have to! It wasn’t anything disastrous.”

“Is that a no?” he asked with puppy eyes, eager for an answer. You didn’t want to let him down, plus he seemed like a nice guy.

“You know what, let’s go but I’ll pay for my drink.”

“I insist.” you smiled at his stubborness.  

----

“So..” Hoseok said while stirring his coffee.  

“yees..” you answered looking back at him with curious eyes.

“I was thinking...if you’d like us to grab a snack/drink from time to time.”

You nodded hapily. You wanted a new friend especially when it’s someone as good and funny as Hoseok.

“Ah yes totally! I’d love to be your friend. You’re so funny and all!.” you replied and touch his arm playfully.

Hoseok sighed and his face seemed a bit dissapointed.

“Oh so you view me as a friend?”

“Yes...isn’t that what you wanted too?”

He moved closer and took your hand in his. It was a brave move and even tho his eyes were uncertain, his body language said otherwise.

“I mean, actually dating. You and me, more than friends.” he said and left your hand, letting you to decide on your own.

This came out of nowhere. You weren’t expecting this to be said so fast but here he is, right in front of you, asking. Hoseok had every charateristic a girl would want. Funny,smart and what seems like high levels of testosterone judging by his muscular body and prominant jawline. But, you didn’t know if this was enough. Relationships aren’t for you and you don’t  want to take time off your studies. You don’t even have feelings for him in the first place. You don’t have feelings for anyone, they are pointless attempts of nature to make you birth offsprings and save the specie from dissapearing.  

He studied your face for any expression that might suggest your answer but there was none. You were lost in those rapid thoughts and didn’t know what to do. When you finally came out of it and saw his pleading expression you shouted out

“YES” you bought your hand in front of your lips to shush yourself.

Hoseok smiled the brighest and most beautiful smile you’ve ever seen. His eyes were sparkling in hapiness and felt relieved to hear you, his cheeks rosy again. His beauty made you forget, the horror you just said. Did you just said...yes? How can you do such a thing? You don’t even have feelings for him. 

You sighed and he noticed.

“Don’t feel pressured. We will take things as slowly as you want them to be.”

Little did he know that wasn’t it.  

“Ah thank you Hoseok for being so understanding. Now I gotta go because … I gotta go. See you later.”

“Talk to you later” he said

“Oh and I forgot, can I have your phone you know...”

Typical couple things  

«Yes» you said and wrote your number down.

----

“What do I do when we walk side by side?”

You asked Val while holding a notebook in your lap, making small marks to study later.

“Just be natural! Don’t study for a date too”

“How can I be natural? I’ve got no idea what’s up with all this dating thing you guys do like it’s breathing or something. I will watch Netflix series once you’ll leave, those stupid crybaby ones, to find out more.”

“Ugh, okay you hold his hand too? maybe?”

“hold..his..hand..too..” you repeated while writing it down. It’s not that hard after all, unless he takes things further which he said won’t be happening.

“Now you can leave or you can leave because I’ve got very important things to do.”

“Very important aka watching Netflix.”

“Exactly” you nodded while laughing.

“okay I’m not gonna stay any longer either you know...i’m prone to crying.”

“Yes I know plus your PMS makes things even worse, I mean it’s normal you know with all those chemical and hormonal imbal...”

the sudden sound caught you off guard, Val really didn’t seem like the type that wanted to learn. You sighed loudly and moved to the couch. You truly made a mess. You didn’t want to hurt him with saying no, but if you say no now, it’ll hurt him even more. It’d be best if he didn’t have feelings but according to his body language and days he’s been exposed to your pherormones, he is in and deep. It might be beneficial tho, it’s not the most humanatarian idea but you can make the best out of a bad situation. Maybe, if you live through a relationship, you’ll be able to grasp why it means so much to others. An experiment.

It won’t hurt anyone, right?

[krizaland]

Do you think in your Zimvoid story that our zim has a random picture of his s/o in his pak and is looking at it a lot. Like he is under the impression he might not ever see his s/o again. (the sad talk from all the other zims arent helping either.)

How delightfully angsty Anon! You just made me cry gave me inspiration for a chapter 2!

Bring some tissues and strap in! We’re going on another feels trip! I apologize for any sadness this chapter may bring you!

Be warned: There’s spoilers for the Invader Zim comics ahead!

First Chapter

Protip: If you listen to a funny song (like a meme song such as: All Star or even circus music) while reading angst then it helps halt the tears. 

Meanwhile, your Zim had just climbed the ranks in the arena.

“Congratulations, 2170, you’re the new 2165. You can look forward to your new assignment, Mold Scraper” 500 sighed as he changed the number on your Zim’s collar.

“What?! No! Is that better than sewage unclogger?” Your Zim huffed.

“Very slightly”

“Unacceptable! I demand something better!” You Zim snapped as he pointed to the sky.

“Well if you really want to participate in more fights..” 500 pulled out his book of Zim opponents and flipped through the pages.

“As many as it takes! It’ll be a cakewalk! No Zim walks cakes better than I! You hear?!” You Zim declared as he shook his fist at the sky.

“Just point me in the way of the mes I need to destroy!” Your Zim’s voice dripped with venom as a sinister grin spread across his face.

“Alright, let me chose your next opponent. Just wait here for a bit.” 500 groaned as he gestured to an empty seat in the waiting area.

Your Zim promptly took his seat and let out a sigh. While he would never admit it, he was starting to get tired.

“Why am I even doing this? Everyone knows that I’m the superior Zim! And what’s with all of this talk of ‘things’. This Zim needs no pathetic ‘thing’! These battles are a waste of my time!” Your Zim thought to himself.

Suddenly his mind reminded him of something you once said to him when he was feeling down:

“Sometimes, we have to do things we don’t want to do. Does it suck? Yeah. But can you do it? Absolutely. Zim, you’re the best at everything you do! Go out there and show them who’s boss!”

Your Zim chuckled as he straightened up a bit. He opened his PAK and a small gadget popped out and displayed a hologram of you.

It wasn’t just any hologram of you. It was his personal favorite hologram of you.

In the hologram, you were wearing your fanciest formal attire for the Skool dance. You looked so lovely that evening. Your Zim let out a dreamy sigh as he remembered that night:

“Thanks for coming with me, Zim.” You smiled as you held Zim’s hand.

“It’s of no trouble, Sweet Y/N! I’d like learn more about these human ‘dances’” Your Zim explained as he followed you inside the Skool.

You gently lead your Zim to the lunchroom. The lunchroom was poorly decorated in half assed streamers and poorly edited posters that read: “Danse”.  The smell of mold and expired milk still lingered in the air but your Zim didn’t care.

All he could focus on was the feeling of your hand intertwined with his.

“Seriously, Y/N?! I can’t believe you brought that alien monster to the dance! He probably wants to plant a bomb or something!”

Dib’s whining woke your Zim from his thoughts.

“Dib, he’s not a monster. Zim and I are just here to dance and have a good time.” You huffed as you shot Dib a glare.

“Yeah! So go wallow in your lonely existence somewhere else, Dib-Stink!” Your Zim added.

“Zim! Don’t stoop to his level!” You scolded as you shot your Zim a glare.

“I don’t get it! What do you even see in him?! He’s an alien! An evil monster that wants to destroy mankind! How can you stand there and call him your boyfriend?!” Dib ranted as he gestured to Zim.

“Dib, there’s more to Zim than you think. He’s not evil and has given up on destroying the Earth like a year ago.” You huffed.

“Do you honestly believe he’s changed?! How gullible can you be?! Why don’t you -”

“I’m not going to argue with you, Dib! Leave us alone!” You interjected.

“Gah! Why do you love him?! There’s so many better people out there! You could do so much better!” Dib insisted.

“C’mon, Zim let’s go find somewhere else to dance.” You growled as you gently lead your Zim away from Dib.

Your Zim let you lead him away from Dib but stuck his worm like tongue at him while you weren’t looking.

“You should be dancing with me…” Dib trailed off as he hung his head in defeat.

“You’d think after you apologized said you’ve changed that Dib would leave you be.” You grumbled as you sat down at one of the open lunch tables.

“Oh let’s not let the Dib monkey rain all over our perfect dance!” Zim mused as he sat beside you.

“Heh. I guess you’re right, about that.” You giggled.

“Attention, students! It’s time for the obligatory slow dance! Find yourself a partner or suffer in your bone crushing loneliness!” The DJ announced.

“Slow Dance? Are they going to bring out a time warper and slow down the flow of time?!” Your Zim squealed as his eyes lit up.

“I wish! But no. A slow dance is where they play a really mushy love song and you’re supposed to dance all slow to it.” You chuckled.

“Oh. I liked the time warp idea better.” Your Zim pouted.

“Yeah, me too. Wanna slow dance anyway?” You offered as you got up.

“Sure, why not?” Your Zim chirped as he joined you.

You gently took your Zim’s hand and lead him to the dance floor.

Upon observing how the other students were dancing, Your Zim activated his spider legs and gently put his hands around your waist.

You giggled as put your hands on his shoulders.

Your Zim was very nervous but the soft look in your eyes put him at ease.

Soon the music began and all your Zim could focus on was you.  

Your Zim followed your gentle movements. His hips swayed with yours and let the music take the reigns.

“Wise men say, Only fools rush in.  

But I can’t help falling in love with you.”

You mouthed the words as you gazed into Zim’s eyes.

“Shall I stay? Would it be a sin? Oh if I can’t help

Falling in love with you.”

There may have not been a time warper nearby but time still felt like it was slowing down none the less.

“Like a river flows, slowly to the sea. Darling so it goes

Some things are meant to be”

Suddenly the other students seemed to melt away. It soon it felt as if you and your Zim were the only ones in the room.

“Take my hand, take my whole life too. Oh for I can’t help,

Falling in love with you”

Your Zim gazed deeply into your E/C eyes. They looked as if they twinkled with stardust.

“Like a river flows, slowly to the sea, darling so it goes,

Somethings are meant to be”

Your Zim never thought he’d ever feel anything like affection in his life. He used to think affection was for the weak but all of that changed once he met you.

“Oh take my hand, take my whole life too. Oh for I can’t help

Falling in love with you”

Your Zim never expected a human to be on his list of the most beautiful things he’d ever seen but there you were.

Your Zim had travelled throughout the universe and had seen his fair share of beautiful things but you? You surpassed every single one of those things. It so was more than just your physical appearance as well.

You were strong, intelligent, and most importantly,

You were open minded.

You never judged nor made fun of him. You always gave him the respect he so rightfully deserved! You were the only one who understood his incredible genius! You were perfect in every way.

“Oh for I can’t help

Falling in love with you” You and your Zim’s voices melted together as you gently pressed you’re foreheads together.

The moment the song ended, your Zim’s instincts kicked in.

Without a second thought, he removed his hands from around your waist.

He cupped your face and pulled you into a passionate kiss.

It wasn’t just any kiss, however. It was a first kiss. For the both of you.

Your eyes were wide for a moment before slowly closing as you let your Zim explore every inch of your mouth.

Your tongue playfully wrestled with his as he let out a few muffled chirps and purrs.

“Hey! Excuse me!”

The sound 500’s tired voice brought your Zim back to reality.

“Huh? Gah!” Your Zim yelped as he realized he was kissing your hologram.

“You should probably put that away. You’re never gonna see them again.” 500 sighed as he gestured to your hologram.

“Nonsense! Of course I’ll see my sweet Y/N again!” Your Zim insisted as he shut off the hologram.

“That’s what every Zim says” 500 groaned as a few tears begun to trickle down his cheeks.

“And your point is?”

“My point is that you’re stuck here forever. No Zim has ever successfully left the Zimvoid. You might as well forget that your Y/N, heck, any Y/N even existed. Trust me, keeping those memories around just makes things worse than they already are.” 500 explained as a few more tears streamed down his face.

“No! You lie! YOU LIE!” Your Zim screeched as a few tears of his own begun to form in his eyes.

“That’s what every Zim says.” 500 shook his head as he dried his tears.

“I will leave this filthy planet! I will leave this planet and see my sweet Y/N again IF ITS THE LAST THING I DO!!” Your Zim roared as a few tears dripped down his cheeks.

“Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I’ve heard it all before. Here. I’ve found your next opponent. Come with me please.” 500 groaned as he lead your Zim back to the arena.

“Very well! GIVE ME YOUR WORST!”

Next

[nureyevsbf]

first ten for carlisle :3c

i literally almost cried MULTIPLE times while writing this let’s GO

tw for mild internalized homophobia in question 7

sorry if you’re just some rando looking for twilight content who comes across this bc of all the fuckin keywords in it

otp question meme

1. Who is the most affectionate?

does it even count if i say both??? like i have lovey dovey bitch disease and im extremely affectionate but like. carlisle. carlisle who was lonely and heartbroken and crushed by self-loathing for years. carlisle who was touch starved for decades and would probably cry if he was physically capable the first time i touched him lovingly. carlisle who thought he was a monster and damned to hell who finally has someone - someone who's hunted monsters like him before and yet sees this beauty in him and loves him with their whole heart - that looks at him like he put the stars in the sky himself and who loves every part of him and insists he's more human than any of them. that carlisle?????? look me in the fuckin eyes and tell me he wouldn't b the softest most affectionate full-of-love motherfucker on the planet.

2. Big spoon/Little spoon?

im the big spoon just bc i Always am and Am Never the little spoon, but a lot of time i'll sleep on his chest while he sits up doing whatever (since, like, doesnt need to sleep and shit)

3. Most common argument?

hmm. i don't think we would argue very much?? we probably don't argue at all until the other cullens start coming along, and it's more... how to correctly handle them. like specifically in new moon i would Definitely be against packing up and moving out just bc edward's being weird and fucking emo and that would definitely turn into...one of the few heated arguments we ever have.

4. Favorite non-sexual activity?

carlisle really likes cooking, even though he can't eat any of it himself, so he enjoys helping me in the kitchen when i make food. he also likes being with me when i sleep - be it curling up with me and resting his eyes or reading while i sleep on his chest or whatever.

5. Who is most likely to carry the other?

i think i've answered this before and said it would probably b an even split but. yeah normally it'd b me due to who i am as a person so u would Think. but like. he MORE than has the strength for it and definitely loves to just. sweep me off my feet, literally, when the moment calls for it tbh

also, given vampires r like. Basically stone. i think it's very difficult for me to lift him in my human form.

6. What is their favorite feature of their partner’s?

ive definitely answered this one before but. for me, my favorite physical feature is his voice and his eyes. like of course All of him is breathtaking but those two things specifically get my ass. but my favorite non-physical feature - and yes i know i wind up saying this of a Lot of my f/os, im pretty sure this is just my type - is his heart. like....he's such an inherently good person and his desire to do good runs so deep that that's the thing that was amplified when he was turned - he literally is the only cullen who has never taken a human life bc his gift is literally to be able to resist THE most quintessential part of being a vampire. and i RLLY fuckign love that abt him.

he i think also likes my eyes??? there's nothing special abt them like his my eyes are just rlly pretty like irl hjdfghdfjg. he also really just...loves the fact that i'm flesh and blood. like he relishes in my warmth and my heartbeat and the fact that i'm living and it's just made better by the fact that i'm not mortal. like he can still have a partner who's all these things and whose life he can cherish w/o having to deal with me eventually falling victim to this mortal coil that doesn't affect him (and i mean - both of us are not invulnerable but at least it's like. time that's never going to do us part.)

but then as far as non-physical features go, he likes.....ok this is very broad and i do have to explain all the shit that falls under this umbrella. but he likes my sense of good. i'm a deeply, deeply loyal person, and have this very strong sense of morals and a code of honor, and i'm naturally very selfless and giving, and these r all things that made him fall in love w me in the first place.

7. What’s the first thing that changes when they realize they have feelings for the other?

oh this is so so emo and im so sorry for how sad this is abt to get. this is one of the parts that almost made me cry and not bc of how soft it is.

for me it's not too bad i just am very obvious abt how attached to him i am and wanna spend more time w him and really like latch onto him once i realize ive caught feelings. like that's just how i am in general.

but w carlisle. it's so hard for him to deal with. like it's just massive fucking turmoil for him. this affection and adoration he feels and is dying to express but this horrible guilt and his self-hatred getting amplified - like, again, he hates himself and what he is and he thinks he's this awful monster even if he's never hurt a human being and is actively trying to help people by studying medicine, and then there's me who he sees the world in and who he knows has distaste for his kind (bc again has actively hunted his kind) and he's just hit with all this shit like. he's not good enough for me, what if i find out abt the way he feels abt me and i'm disgusted by him, what if i leave and don't want to travel with him anymore. could he take that kind of heartbreak, could he take being alone again, could he take being left because of what a wretched thing he is? (there's also probably. religious panic :\\ im sure like coming to terms w being bi/mlm is NOT easy for him, son of a preacher, and im sure that's a part of it.)

he reacts to this whole fucking chaos of emotions in him by withdrawing a lot, i think? getting quieter and distancing himself from me - he's not even really meaning to, he wants to be near me but it hurts so much he just does it on instinct. which turns around and hurts him more, and hurts me in the process, so really this initial weird period of painful ass angsty pining just hurts us both, like, way more than necessary

8. Nicknames? & if so, how did they originate?

i have Not ultimately though up anything since i was last asked this :pensive: so i think i have to just come to terms w the fact that i don't think we would give each other nicknames. not even shortened versions of our names (outside of me w eli but i literally just go by that normally.) pet names, yes, absolutely; it'd be my standard ones - dear, baby, doll, honey, sometimes love/my love, and if i Really wanna be over-the-top half-facetiously sappy and gross sometimes i'll say "my darling dearest." w him it's darling, dear, love/my love, and his gross over-the-top cheesy bullshit is 100% genuine and absolutely NOT facetious even a LITTLE bit and it DOES fluster the shit out of me when he does super gay ass shit like call me "my heart" or "my light in the dark" or whatever other sappy ass BULLSHIT

9. Who worries the most?

this one i know i've answered before. and like, it's him.... i think he just has a lot to worry abt. im fleshy and kinda vulnerable and that scares him - i think he worries a lot too abt like. what if the nature of our relationship makes me a target. esp with the volturi, who like have it in their rules that vampires are not to associate w werewolves, and that's not what i am but would they be willing to listen to that? especially if aro reads my mind and realizes i've killed their kind before?? the family probably keeps it under wraps tbh, hides me from the volturi, but that's not really a perfect solution. it's probably not till the end of breaking dawn when the volturi agrees to honor the treaties/relationship w the pack that they feel like i'm safe.

he also just worries abt little shit too!! like i can and do get hurt in ways they don't even if it's NOT a big deal. cut myself cooking (which to clarify. my blood isn't an issue bc it smells like shit to them. i think that might have been confirmed for the pack too but. i smell like dog it's Not appealing) or twist my ankle doing some dumbass shit or whatever. and i heal much faster than humans so this shit isn't a problem!! and the rational doctor in him is like this is a very small injury it's really NOT an issue. but the husband in him is like ))))): i don't want him to be hurting

and it just kind of results in him hovering nervously and fussing over me when he RLLY doesnt need to be

10. Who remembers what the other one always orders at a restaurant?

w us it's not exactly a big deal given carlisle can't exactly eat out at restraurants lol. he does remember my favorite restaurants in every town we go to and my takeout order and regularly brings food home for me on his way back from work, though.

[thebachelordiaries]

“Sage Advice And Sage Vaginas:” The Bachelorette Premiere Recap

We are officially back! It feels good to be back. I’ve missed being excited on Mondays. I’ve missed my little Twitter family. I’ve missed the memes and the endless sh*t talking. But most of all, I’ve missed seeing the man who I consider my second father: Chris Harrison.

Now let’s just jump right into it. 

The episode begins with Becca crying while looking at pictures of her and Arie. I don’t know how producers got her to cry, but I’m pretty sure Becca has now realized just how lucky she is to have been dumped by Arie. 

She’s done crying. Now it’s time for Becca to pick her head up and live out her new destiny as The Bachelorette.

As the wise artist Ariana Grande one said.

Ain't got no tears left to cry So I'm pickin' it up, pickin' it up I'm lovin', I'm livin', I'm pickin' it up

She’s now The Bachelorette, and women ledes always have the most success with choosing the right partner. As JoJo said later on in the episode, 

“One hundred percent, women are more intuitive and know what they want.” 

Can I get a hell yeah for the superior gender?

I’ve said this before and I’ll say it again, can psychologists do a case study on a woman’s intuition? And if it’s already been done, please slide the scholarly article into my DMs. Thank you in advance.

Look at this Minnesotean snow princess. I am shook.

Can you imagine having such a compelling storyline from being dumped by your fiance for someone else that producers just skim over the fact that your father died of a brain tumor and your mother has battled cancer? This girl has been through too much. If she doesn’t find happiness, all of Bachelor Nation will revolt. And I will be leading the way.

Becca wants a man who is as loyal and loving as her dad was to her mom. She deserves this and nothing less. Can we find this woman a man? Let’s do the damn thing.

(That is the first and last time I will ever say that phrase.)

Becca also has a sister and a corgi nephew, who made a very subtle appearance in the premiere episode. However, it must not go unnoticed.

Follow this little loaf of bread on Instagram: max_in_madison

Becca is then magically transported from Minnesota to LA, where she is seen driving a convertible along the coast of the Pacific. 

At the Bachelor Mansion, she gets some sage advice from the last three Bachelorettes: Rachel, JoJo and Kaitlyn. 

Rachel lit up some sage to get rid of the “bad juju” in the mansion.

"I’m going to sage your pu**y.” -Rachel

This was the first time the people giving advice were actually still in Bachelor-related relationships. It’s like The Bachelorette is becoming more successful with time. I approve. 

What I didn’t approve of was that Kaitlyn got no airtime. 

Hello, 911? I’d like to report that Kaitlyn Bristowe was ROBBED of airtime during The Bachelorette premiere. 

Video Intros

Every season ABC selectively chooses which men we should get to know in their video package intros. We met seven men. That seems like a lot, but here’s what I learned.

Clay— He’s not a regular jock. He’s a sensitive jock.

Garrett—He did a Chris Farley impression without explicitly stating he was doing one, which probably confused 95 percent of all viewers, including myself. Garrett likes doing outdoors stuff. The rest of his personality is hot air. This is everything you could ever want or need to know about Garrett.

Jordan— He has a unique (re: dumb) way of describing things, but I’m grateful for him because he’s going to be entertaining us for about 60 percent of the season in his ITMs. 

Lincoln— I take back whatever I said about him being attractive for having an accent. Listening to his voice has made me iron deficient. Brb, going to go chew on some ice now.

Joe— Joe owns a grocery store, a million-watt smile and a heart of gold. I’m in love.

Jean Blanc— He low-key shaded Trump by saying Haiti is not a “sh*t h*le.” He also has an obsession with smelling things and spending lots of money on material items. He seems ok.

Colton— I’m suspicious of Colton. He’s too ready-made for The Bachelorette: he’s handsome, athletic, loves his dog, owns a nonprofit, allegedly a virgin. Where are his flaws?

I spoke too soon. What in Chris Harrison’s name is he wearing?

Top Limo Entrances 

Leo released his beautiful curly mane to Becca with the line of “let’s let our hair down.” First thing Becca said to him were the words every male suitor wants to hear from a woman: “You have hair like my sister!”

She’s not wrong, though.

Nick came out the limo in a racecar driver suit, clearly making an Arie reference. He asked “what kind of a**hole wears something like this?” and ripped off the outfit to reveal his perfectly tailored suit. I know people were saying it’s in poor taste to bring up Becca’s ex, but I found it hilarious. I thought I was going to dislike Nick because he looks like a huge tool, but it turns out I have a giant crush on him BECAUSE he looks like a huge tool. Nick is the kind of guy you date because you secretly want to emotionally punish yourself. I’m ready for you to ruin my life, Nick. You know where you can find me.

Trent energetically (which is ironic in itself) jumped out the back of a hearse with the line of “Oh my god Becca. When I found out you were The Bachelorette, I literally died.” He was possibly the most “alive” person to ever come out of a hearse.

Garrett pulled up in a minivan with all the equipment necessary for “soccer dad duties.” Producers really are trying to give him an edge. He would be one of the more loved guys this season because of editing if it wasn’t for his giant Instagram fuck up.

Bachelor Mansion Highlights and Lowlights

The Highs

Christon, a former Harlem Globetrotter, jumped over Becca while dunking a basketball. And he did so with all the other guys watching. 

I enjoyed this angle because you get to see the large amount of cameras used during filming. 

Jake getting sent home. I CALLED IT in my “first impressions” review, that him and Becca have probably already met, further proving my theory that attractive people in the same city all know each other. Becca said her and Jake were “acquaintances” and met on “several occasions,” but Jake was unsure if she would remember him since they only met once, alluding to the fact that he may live the majority of his life in a blackout drunk state. As a way to convince Becca to change her mind and keep him around, he said he had a “very transformative year,” whatever that means. Becca was having NONE. OF. IT. and sent his ass home back to Minneapolis. The Bachelorette probably wasn’t for him anyway, especially since production has implemented an alcohol limit.

Blake and Becca had a pretty deep conversation for night one. Blake talked about how his last serious relationship ending abruptly. He said, “If I was able to love the wrong person that much, how much would I be able to love the right person?” Every female on Earth, including Becca agreed with this Tumblr-worthy quote. However, Blake was scammed out of a First Impression Rose by Garrett, who drove up in a minivan and taught Becca how to flyfish in the Bachelor Mansion pool. Blake, you got the First Impression Rose in my eyes, you adorable sweetheart, you.

Jordan’s presence was just an entire highlight reel. As Kaitlyn Bristowe said on her podcast, he has “Jordan-isms.” Some of my favorite ones were:

“People are already going home on the first night.”

“If I don’t get a rose tonight, it would be the biggest upset of all time.”

And in general, him just being offended by everyone’s outfits.

Follow me on Twittter, @thebachdiaries 

The Lows

David/ “Chicken Guy.” I just wasn’t a fan. Dressing up in a costume and saying “Be-CAW” isn’t a personality trait. Also, he looks like the real-life version of the Instagram filter that makes your mouth appear too big for your face.

“Wrong Reasons Police” Chris. Speaking of being creeped out. Chris is the new Iggy of this season: unlikeable, doesn’t belong here, won’t go away and loves to snitch. He’s the “wrong reasons” police, but I can’t really picture someone who takes selfies looking like Derek Zoolander being here for the right reasons. Also his recently-changed Instagram name used to be c_dome, which just creeps me out. If you don’t know what “dome” means, Urban Dictionary is your friend.

The newly implemented alcohol limit was a big lowlight for me. Where were the drunk guys jumping into the pools? We’re going to need someone who says and does stupid things without any sort of inhibitor. Oh wait, we have Jordan. I’m pretty certain he was sober on the first night as he briefly mentioned that Chicken Guy almost got “feathers in his coffee.” Oh the ol’ days of drunken contestants will be missed. Forever in our hearts.

Rose Ceremony

All I need to say here is that Grocery Bae Joe from Chicago went home and the internet has never been more upset about a contestant being sent home night one. He already has about 45K followers on Instagram. If ABC doesn’t bring him to paradise, I will immediately sell all the stock I’ve invested into their company. (Except I don’t invest or even know how to do that crap. But I would if I did because It would just be a terrible business decision to not bring Joe to Paradise.)

Some Takeaways

I can tell Garret and Blake are going to go pretty far based on night one. Based on the season preview, it appears Jason and Colton will go far as well. That literally just might be the final four. However, I don’t follow spoilers, so don’t be that person who tells me what happens. 

I also have a feeling Lincoln might be this season’s villain. Only time will tell how that will play out.

Speaking of Colton, he is allegedly a virgin. However, virginity is a social construct, so anyone can be a virgin if they really believe in themselves. I mean, this franchise has created the most famous fake virgin of all time: Sean Lowe. So sure, Colton’s a virgin.

[allcatsaregreyt]

Sollux Captor - Today at 4:47 AM

[TA began trolling CA!] @Eri Ampora TA: hey, i know you really don't want to talk to me right now, and reflecting on everything, i can't say i blame you in the fucking slightest. TA: you don't have to respond to me TA: but TA: uh TA: please dont block me yet TA: because there's a lot a want to tell you and itll take a few messages to do it TA: afterwards ill leave you alone

Eri Ampora - Today at 4:49 AM

[There's no response. But there's no idle message.]

Sollux Captor - Today at 5:59 AM

TA: when i met you, you were just this fun guy who memed the appropriate amount to be unserious and likeable, and you were fun to mess with too. just. a really fun person to be around. i really wanted someone like that around in my life, you know? TA: the pitch crush i gained on you should have really stayed just a crush, because outside of playful banter and memes, our relationship didn't really have much foundation. you weren't ready yet, and i wanted more out of you than you were ever willing to give me. TA: you started getting flush for me while i started getting pale for you because the more i learned about you, the more i started to pity you. the more i wanted to help you. TA: i wanted to fix you. TA: what an arrogant thought, right? TA: but i never thought of you as a project or a puzzle, i always thought of you as a person, my partner, someone hurting that i wanted to see heal. i wanted to be the one who could help you get there. TA: but, well. i'm shit with people. TA: and we both agree that you have a lot of shitty qualities too. TA: i couldn't figure out how to help, the only thing i knew that worked to get you to open up was to push you until you cracked. no one ever offered any other solutions, and it was the only thing i had to get you to talk to me. TA: that was wrong to you, and i don't think i can ever apologize enough for doing that to you. it'll never be enough. TA: i feel like i was wrong for making you be in a relationship with me to begin with. TA: i'm proud of how far you've come, of how much you've healed. TA: but trying to evaluate that pride, maybe that's wrong too. maybe i'm only proud because you did what i wanted you to do. TA: and that's disgusting too. TA: i hate people doing what i want because they don't want to bother telling me otherwise. Sollux Captor - Today at 6:00 AM TA: all this time i thought i was doing the right thing. doing right by you. i genuinely believed it. i've poured so much into trying to get you to thrive and be happy that i lost that ability for myself, and i'm realizing that it not only wasn't ever asked for, but didn't even help. TA: i wasted both of our times, all these last few months. TA: i'm still guilty about hurting you, when i was trickster. TA: i remember the whole thing. i remember that i was made to hate you. but i was so bitter even without that. TA: bitter that you kept running away because you needed to be left alone, and i wouldn't give you that. TA: i should have given up, back then. TA: when of all the things you could have chosen to forget to make your life easier, you chose me instead. TA: that i was the thing making your life so terrible, that you needed to erase me from it to find peace. TA: what did i do instead? TA: i kept pushing. TA: maybe mindfang was right about me and i do have some kind of hero complex. TA: need to be a savior. need to create the disaster. TA: and it did this to you. TA: you deserve so much more. TA: you deserve someone who can love you the right way, not poison you with "good intentions". TA: i really hope karkat can do that for you. TA: i hope that nothing happens between the two of you because of me. TA: please dont be mad at him. TA: we never really even had a real talk about breaking up. TA: just some vague ventposts. TA: i've never been more blind in my life than i have when being in a relationship with you, eri. TA: i didn't know where to go, had no one who would tell me, and you wouldn't talk. TA: i had to do trial and error and even that was hard because you wouldn't tell me if i was doing something wrong. TA: i didn't WANT to give up on you. TA: but trying to help you has eaten me to the point of crying constantly, and i just couldn't fucking do it anymore. TA: my heart can't handle it. i couldn't do it anymore. TA: but i didn't have an intention to stop being your friend, or to stop supporting you. TA: karkat said he'd keep doing what i tried to do, and hell, god knows he's doing it better than i ever did or could. TA: he said that maybe, once you'd healed, we could be together again. TA: but i knew then that it wouldn't happen, even if i could be hopeful. TA: i knew karkat and i wouldn't be enough, that's why i used my contacts to set you up with a therapist who could. TA: i hope she helps you. > There's a pause. TA: i dont know what pushed you to want to kill people in my town, i don't know how saness found you to stop you. TA: karkat and i were really, really sick when that happened. TA: i could barely walk and still i told her i'd come there if i needed to. TA: i wanted to make sure you were okay. TA: but i TA: i felt like you didnt want me there TA: that me being there would have made it all worse TA: so i didn't TA: after i found out where you were i was trying to figure out how to make things better TA: i'm fucking terrified of star but i contacted him because you two were close TA: i thought maybe you two could stay together TA: so that saness wouldnt have to keep you prisoner TA: but then star told me that you two fell out TA: and i didnt know any other options TA: i wanted to talk to you so badly TA: i wanted to understand what was happening TA: i was at school when shit hit the fan and i asked saness again if i could go there TA: because there wasnt another way to you TA: and i was so fucking scared eri TA: i couldnt lose you TA: i couldnt lose another moirail TA: i didnt want anyone doing anything they would regret TA: and i didnt have any fucking answers to suggest anything TA: i heard you were going to that prince guy TA: nadire? TA: and he was kind to karkat TA: so i thought youd be safe there TA: and im glad you went TA: and fuck i've already said so much but there's still so much i want you to know TA: i'm sorry about everything that's happened with saness TA: i'm sorry i pushed you so hard TA: i'm sorry i couldn't be a good kismesis TA: or moirail TA: or matesprit TA: fuck i haven't even been a good friend to you. TA: i'm never going to regret meeting you, or loving you. TA: i'm never going to regret kissing you, or forget anything that the stuffed wolf stood for. TA: did you know i got the scarf its wearing from star TA: star told me not to tell you that but i dont think im going to talk to you again TA: star was the one who hired me to check up on you while you were still living with me too TA: i wasnt supposed to say that either but it doesnt matter anymore TA: you deserve to know all the things i didnt tell you or couldnt tell you or wouldnt tell you TA: ive appreciated all the time weve spent together TA: theres been so much trouble but theres been so much good too TA: i miss you TA: i miss holding your hand TA: im not going to live all that long compared to you but TA: youre someone im always going to think about TA: no ones ever going to replace you eri TA: so what if theres people with your name TA: so what if im dating one TA: hes not you TA: and hell never be you TA: hes got your voice but ive never heard you in his words TA: youre sweet and kind and troubled and so so gentle and TA: not replaced TA: im sorry i just realized you wouldnt care for any of this TA: im sorry ive guilted you so much TA: im sorry ive pushed you TA: im sorry i broke promises TA: im sorry ive hurt you TA: im sorry ive forced you TA: im sorry ive cornered you TA: im sorry for all the things i cant name TA: i blocked you because i thought youd be better off without me still trying to engage this awful friendship TA: and im going to want to every time i see you TA: because just seeing your username on the dash makes me smile TA: just like it did months ago TA: even after everything thats happened TA: thinking about you makes me smile eri TA: and it still will TA: im not going to go to your lighthouse anymore TA: im having a transportalizer put into the hole so i dont have to cross your property to get into it TA: and its far enough away that it shouldnt be a bother for you TA: ill stay out of sight so you dont have to see me at all TA: and if its still not good enough ill abandon it and dig out elsewhere TA: but i can't leave it because the bees need cared for TA: and im sorry for getting mad TA: at this point i dont have a right to be angry TA: i took your tag as an invitation and broke in TA: and hell thats probably what you were baiting me for TA: because youre fucking smart and im just a shitty lowblood that happens to know how to hack TA: i'm not going to say im sorry for being in your life TA: you would have died TA: and i dont know maybe you would have preferred that TA: but ive been grateful for the extended time ive gotten with you TA: but i dont think ive helped you at all since the start TA: just gave you a few laughs but ultimately ive only hurt you TA: and i dont even think youre still reading at this point ive sent a lot TA: youll probably block me before you finish because its annoying TA: so its probably safe to say this by now TA: before we cut this off forever TA: i want to see you one more time TA: i want to give you a hug TA: and i want to say goodbye TA: because youre a real person TA: and you deserve a proper seperation instead of everything happening over text [TA ceased trolling CA!]

Eri Ampora - Today at 6:05 AM

CA: i don't think i could look you in the eye wwithout feelin' sick. don't come to see me.[CA ceased trolling TA!][CA has blocked TA!]

[mysticalmindblog]

It is understandable that so many are quarantined and locked down now and feeling strong fear and anger about their situations, but these are destructive and debilitating things to feel and endure. There is another way to be during this crisis.

Once again, it is the theme of this article to focus on being for others what you want them to be for you.

You don't have to be a Saint, an Angel, or a Sage, to care wholeheartedly and show unconditional love and compassion; and yet to that someone in need, you may just be the Guardian Angel they have been praying for.

You basically have to go from being angry and grouchy to showing some love to those who need it. What you give comes back to you !!

This article is not about the reciprocity of 'love' in a relationship setting. However, whether you are in a reciprocal love relationship or not, this article can definitely help you to perceive other dimensions of interpersonal relationships.

Unfortunately, 'Love' is a word that is thrown around so loosely in today's 'freedom & liberation' modern society. It is the subject of meme after meme, quote after quote, and countless fables and idealized fictional scenarios. Four letters making a word that has such a generalized scope of uses and meanings for so many.

There is no point in going into a lengthy discussion of the meaning of Love in this blog article. If you type "What is love" into Google, you will be met by over 530 million linked articles/videos etc.

Love

I will however, for the sake of this blog, encapsulate my perception of the concept of Love into two words: Unbounded Compassion.

I have learned that Love can originate as a manifestation of Compassion; but please don't misunderstand - that doesn't mean I go around falling in love with the people I 'feel sorry for'. It actually hearkens back to a realization I had many years ago that changed my perception of the way I see people in general, in the world around me.

- "I find it an ongoing challenge to be compassionate in my life. I accept this, and understand it is normal. But how so..?" -

Because I am prone to being careless with my thoughts at times, and I find myself thinking selfishly and putting myself and my needs first.

At this point many would be thinking, "There's nothing wrong with that." - It is seen as part of the 'Survival of the Fittest' paradigm, and the 'Win or Lose' mentality... You know; the COMPETITIVE URGE stuff we have been sociologically programmed with, since our earliest memories. Again, please don't misunderstand - the context of this article, is to explore and understand our ongoing struggles to rise above what is deemed normal and strive to reach higher into new uncharted realms of living purposefully, mindfully, and spiritually.

As such, you will be challenged by my writings to see through your eyes; with my eyes; to share perception, and take the journey of Life together.

A Vow to the Universe

Actually, let me stop right here a minute to tell you... Yes YOU - who are reading this, that we don't know each other; and yet I feel you as I write these words, in a way that escapes vocabulary in description. I made a vow to the Universe quite some time ago that I wanted to be a voice of unconditional love and compassion with no face and no ego to all my human brothers and sisters on this amazing little planet of ours.

One planet, one species of sentient beings with the capacity to love, to laugh, to care, to cry, to hold, and to grow. We are united whether we like it or not by this time in which we share our world. We all suffer the same sufferings, we all idealize and hope for the best in all things, we all feel pain, and sadly we all feel so alone sometimes.

I hope and pray that you will stay with me through this world crisis and through my quotes/articles so we can take this quest together; and I dearly hope and pray that whatever light and love you receive through this article, through my deeply candid and intimate writings with you about the human condition - you will take and pass it on, paying it forward, like a wave of light for those suffering in lonely darkness.

Sorrows

So, it can be so challenging to feel compassion at times, especially when life can be so devastatingly painful and full of personal suffering. The self-preservation instinct invariably remains active as we strive to overcome insurmountable challenges, and odds, and situations that seem entirely detrimental to our very sanity, our very existence.

You and I both, we have faced them. We face them sometimes on a daily basis, like haunting wraiths - family dramas, mistakes we have made, and bad decisions, sometimes trying to dissolve those feelings in things that can become unacknowledged addictions, causing more deep sorrows, so much suffering, in us, and all around us, all these things can afflict and vex us to the point where we can feel emotionally numb, compassion crushed because our own morale has become so burned and damaged.

Empowerment

But what was a personal revelation for me was to comprehend that the very act of setting aside my own issues to focus attention on the issues of someone else that I saw who needed care, attention, guidance, and protection - not only relieved my own pain response to personal suffering through my own challenges, but provoked an internal empowerment that said "Yes, I can..! I can make a difference, I can be a light for someone else even if everything has gone to crap in my own life".

Suffering

Curiously enough, by helping to deal with the problems of another through a heart of compassion I was able to change my perspective on my own issues. I learned not only that so many around me are going through the most intense and insane forms of suffering, many of those sufferings are of a type that are truly dark and shameful to the ones suffering - and very common it is that they are actually victims of the evils of others. I have cried many times from the very pit of my stomach, (you know what I mean, right? The type of uncontrollable grief-stricken crying that wracks your entire body from head to toe) while doing my best to be out of the sight of those who I have attempted to help because, it's not pity we want... - Us suffering humans; it's simple love, a kind smile, a soul warming hug, it's simple compassion, it's simple partnering, a safety net, a mechanism to share our pain in an unobtrusive way.

It is very rewarding, and very fulfilling, to make yourself available to someone who you see is suffering, especially when you are suffering yourself. I promise you.

So that's what I meant with this quote. If it is your friend, and they are suffering, be compassionate and make their dramas and challenges your own - even if it is to sit and listen, and empathize. Be that guardian angel who becomes a mirror of reflection. Very often, if we are able to vent and talk about our problems, we can actually come up with our own solutions. It's a cognitive process that's part of oral communication, on an emotional level. If it is your partner, child, grandparent - or a complete stranger - STEP OUT OF YOUR COMFORT ZONE, and stop thinking of yourself, and be the very best compassionate sentient being you CAN BE, to that one who is suffering and in need. You will rapidly see how your own life, your own troubles and challenges, will either become easier to solve, or just simply fade away, no longer important.

In this perfect storm of a global pandemic and global lockdown - this is a perfect form of Unconditional Love - when carried out with your full, mindful self.

If I was to rank the importance of coming to a higher understanding, and practice, of Unbounded Compassion, I would have to say it is the number One most important aspiration you should look to achieve. It will lead you into an understanding of yourself, and people, and the world around you, that will catapult you into a journey of self-discovery you can never turn your back on. You will begin to see how your life, and the lives of others can be so much more fulfilled, and warm, and beautiful, and peaceful, and productive. You will feel like you have suddenly come into possession of the greatest secret gift in existence.

And in a way, you will.

Think about the following...

Compassion is and was at the center of the lives of so many important and influential figures, some are worshiped, or celebrated, or revered, still today, even aside from such as Buddha, or Jesus, there are Mahatma Gandhi, Swami Vivekananda, John Wesley, St. Francis of Assisi, Guru Arjan, Mother Teresa, John Calvin, Sri Sri Ravi Shankar, and of course the current Dalai Lama, who said that "If you want others to be happy, practice compassion. If you want to be happy, practice compassion."

I created this quote, so that what I had found to be true, could be established almost as a *mantra to self.

[cakelanguage]

More Dragon Age Kink Meme prompt fills because why not? There’s Adoribull in this as well, you just have to get to it!

You can also read this on AO3.

Dorian had always been one to break the rules, much to his family’s consternation. Whether it was sleeping with the elevated men of the magisterium and subtly blackmailing them into doing what he wanted them to do or denying his father’s wishes for him to marry, he was ready to deliver a heavy dose of rebellion. Oh, but the blackmailing was the best part.

His father always assumed that Dorian simply slept with any man who was willing to bend Dorian over a table, but it was not so. Dorian strategized and targeted his next rendezvous with a goal in mind and that goal had always been to gather as much dirt on his target as he could so that he was in control for a while.

At first, he had all the blackmail stored away, lengthy pages of incriminating evidence tucked into the hidden drawer of his desk. He figured he’d use them eventually but better to save them until he really needed them. He would just keep moving targets, keep getting information. It wasn’t like he was in short supply of bed partners. He was beautiful, generations of good breeding had ensured his good looks, and he knew how to please a man. It was a turn on to watch men gasp and moan as he rode them or used his mouth. It made Dorian feel powerful.

It was on one such occasion that he met Adavra.

He’d been working to gain a foot in the door with Magister Lartys, who was proving to be both a difficult target and entirely too easy. It was a strange middle ground really, not that Dorian was complaining. A well placed compliment here, a bit of ego stroking there, and a few innuendos to catch a carnal attention and Dorian was in. He almost felt bad for the spouses of these Magisters. Almost.

It was after sex, when he was putting on his robes, beautiful blues and the ever present snake stitched into the fabric, that he saw her. She was obviously a servant, her pointed ears being the giveaway. Not knowing where the he was going he decided it’d be best to ask her.

“Excuse me,” Dorian said, voice full of charm.

But the elf gave a quiet cry of… fear? Dorian stared in bewilderment as she immediately dropped to the floor, bowing her head in submission. The roll she had been carrying bounced quietly and then settled onto the stone feet away from her.

“I’m s-sorry, Ser,” she said, her voice quivering. “I-it’s j-just that, we’re starving, Ser, please d-don’t tell my master.”

Dorian felt a nausea build in his stomach. This wasn’t what he was expecting at all. Wasn’t she a servant? Would a servant be treated like this? Dorian slowly lowered himself down to the elf’s height, his knees making a small thud as they hit the floor. The elf began to ramble faster her speech now a garbled mix of elvish and tevene and possibly some common. He shushed her quietly. “It’s quite alright, please calm down, take a deep breath I’m not telling anyone anything.”

The elf’s head shot up to look at him and Dorian’s heart clenched at the dirty face he was staring at. Choppy, black hair hung limply around her gaunt face and her large eyes were framed by deep smudges of purple bruises, from lack of sleep or otherwise Dorian wasn’t sure. Her eyes filled with fresh tears and she bowed her head again. “Thank you, Ser, oh thank you.”

Dorian shook his head. “None of that, there is no need to thank me really.” And there wasn’t, not to this extent. “What’s your name?”

She bit her lip. “It’s Adavra, Ser.”

Dorian hummed and gave her a tentative smile. “Adavra,” he let it roll off his tongue and gave a nod. “It’s a very pretty name.”

Adavra’s face flushed and she wiped at her tears. “Thank you, Ser.”

Dorian scoffed. “Oh that won’t do, much too formal for my taste.” He reached his hand out to her, making sure not to move to quickly to avoid startling her. “Dorian of House Pavus.”

Her face scrunched up in confusion. “You want me to call you by your first name?”

Dorian gave her a bewildered look. “Of course I do, why you aren’t much older than I am. How old are you?”

She shrugged her shoulders. “I think around twenty-four.”

“You aren’t sure?”

“I don’t know how much time has passed.”

“You don’t… how long have you been serving here?”

The elf scoffed quietly. “Serving, yeah, right.”

Dorian’s eyebrows furrowed. “Are you not?”

She gave him a flat look. “I wouldn’t call this servitude, just slavery.”

That wasn’t right at all. “But- you aren’t paid?”

She actually laughed at that. “I’ve never met one slave who was paid. Our masters give us enough to keep us from keeling over, but that’s all we get.”

Dorian was silent for a while, coming to terms with what he just found out. He knew that there were some who treated their serv—but they weren’t servants, he couldn’t just ignore what she’d told him. They were slaves, all of them this whole time and Dorian had willing let the wool stay over his eyes on the subject. He didn’t question it when his parents had talked about their own servants and how they treated them well. How ignorant of him. “I… I’m sorry.”

She shook her head. “It’s what all you upper class people do, turn a blind-eye from everything that will disturb the perfect world you all live in.” She didn’t look angry, just resigned, like she had already accepted that this is how her life was going to be for the rest of her life. Well not if Dorian had anything to say about it. He wasn’t about to let a whole group of people be locked away for who they were, not when Dorian himself was also being targeted because of who he was. But Dorian could use who he was to his advantage, could hide it if he wished, but the elves couldn’t. So Dorian would just have to help.

“What if… What if I had a way to get you released?”

She looked startled again. “Released? L-like free? Revas?”

“Yes, away from your master, free to leave Tevinter if you so please.”

Adavra’s mouth opened and closed a few times. “J-just me?”

“How many of you are here?”

“Magister Lartys has ten slaves now, eleven last week but Haemir, my brother…” Her voice quivered and she hastily wiped at the tears that had started making their way down her cheeks. “My master wasn’t pleased with him.”

Dorian quietly cursed and brought his hand down to cover her own. “I’m sorry to hear that.” What else was he supposed to say? “But I can get you all out, I just need a few days.”

She gave him a searching look. “How? No slave I’ve known has been able to escape their master.”

Dorian’s lips quirked into a smirk. “Oh you aren’t escaping, he’s going to let you all go.”

Adavra’s face became blank. “No he won’t, Dorian, he’d never do that.”

“He will if he wants the forged gold he used to buy his estate with to remain a secret. Or perhaps his sordid affair with his sister, disturbing really. Or I could go deeper, pull up the covert assassination of his mother to send his father into such despair that he practically gave Magister Lartys his seat in the Magisterium.” He gave her a dark look. “I have enough dirt on him that he’ll cave within a day.”

She sat there in shook, her mouth gaped. “H-how did—“

“How did I uncover all of his secrets? Temptation is a wonderful and terrible thing, Adavra.” One he knew all too well. “And once I get the attention of my target I make sure I get everything I can. Simply duplicating documents or snooping around are great fun especially after I’ve exhausted them enough that I can persuade them to stay asleep. Is it morally the best thing to be doing? No. Do I regret doing it? Not one bit.” And he didn’t, he knew that collecting the blackmail would come in handy, just perhaps not in this way.

She was silent for a moment and he let the silence stretch between them. “Why would you do that? Why would you do that for us? For me? What’ve we ever done for you?”

Dorian shook his head. “It isn’t about what you’ve done, you don’t need to do anything. It’s about knowing what the right thing to do is, and that’s making sure you all are released from this.”

He half thought she was going to throw herself at him, but she settled for turning her hand over so their palms met. “Ma serannas, Dorian.”

Dorian let the smile tug up the corners of his mouth. “Just give me a few days, I can get him to release you all and I can arrange for you to be escorted out of Tevinter or into actual paying jobs if any of you wished to stay.”

Adavra shook her head. “I doubt any of us will want to stay, but you have my thanks once again.”

And that was how Dorian’s secret emancipation started. It was actually exhilarating to be able to help someone, to use his hard work to better the lives of those around him. It was dangerous, especially if the four assassination attempts were anything to go by, but Dorian wasn’t going to stop doing what he could. As lofty as a goal it might be, he would love to free everyone.

Of course then his father tried to use blood magic on him to change him and he was forced to flee. He regretted not being able to continue with freeing the slaves of Tevinter, but his threats of releasing blackmail didn’t hold the same weight once he was no longer residing in Tevinter. And then there was that whole mess with Alexius and then he joined the Inquisition.

Karis Lavellan was a sweet woman, someone who led the Inquisition with a heart of gold and a kind smile. That wasn’t to say she was opposed to being stern when she needed to be. But Karis being the person she was led to her inviting people who were seeking refuge, for whatever reason, to Skyhold. It caused Josephine an almost endless amount of fretting, but the people who arrived were always grateful with whatever the Inquisition provided for them. Except those Orlesian nobles that came to Skyhold to simply look at the castle, they were always hard to please.

On one such occasion, Karis invited a whole slew of elves which garnered a whole range of reactions from nonchalance to obvious disdain. People wouldn’t leave him alone about it, going on about how Dorian must’ve been excited to have slaves again or some other Andraste-forsaken dig at Dorian. It was getting increasingly annoying to try and ignore the comments which is why he’d taken to watching the Chargers run through their training, even joining on occasion.

“Kadan, do you plan on watching all day or do you plan to get off that pretty little ass of yours and train with us?” Bull asked, as he hefted his ridiculous dawnstone axe onto his shoulders. Dorian wasn’t really sure why the Iron Bull was so taken by the color pink, but it was endearing.

“My pretty little ass is quite comfortable where it is, thank you,” Dorian said, going back to the book in his lap. It was fascinating reading up on all the Fade related spells, he could understand why Solas was so obsessed with it.

Bull barked a laugh and turned back to Krem. “Suit yourself, Dorian, you’ll have to join in eventually.”

“Unless you plan on dragging me into the ring, I plan on staying here.”

Krem snorted as he parried another blow from Bull. “Chief, let the Altus do what he wants,” Krem said. “People have been giving him crap all week about the Inquisitor’s new guests.”

Bull grunted. “The elves, yeah I know, thought it might help him release some of that anger.”

“He thanks you for your concern,” Dorian said, turning the page of his book.

“See, he’ll be fine, Chief,” Krem said lowering his shield. “Besides, those elves are arriving today, right?”

“Yeah, the Inquisitor and her advisers were meeting them at the end of the bridge last I’d heard. We’ll probably see them at dinner tonight,” Bull said.

“Not eating at the tavern tonight?” Krem asked.

“You know how Karis is, Cremisius,” Dorian said, closing his book. He obviously wasn’t going to get any reading done. “She likes to enforce that the Inner Circle dines with the new guests of Skyhold. Supposedly it’s to show our openness of some other fluffy nonsense. It shouldn’t be too bad this time.”

“As long as no one makes any comments about you, it should be,” Bull said, his voice tight.

The protectiveness in Bull’s voice sent a shudder up his spine. “Why Amatus, so protective,” Dorian said, standing up from his perch and walking toward where Bull was standing.

Krem groaned and turned away from the two. “Alright, go do that mushy stuff in your room or something,” Krem said.

 Dinner turned out to be much more eventful than Dorian had previously thought. Not even he could have predicted this turn of events.

Dorian and the majority of the inner circle had already sat down before the Inquisitor arrived with their guests. It was mostly small talk, a few thinly veiled barbs sent Dorian’s way but he deflected them with ease. Really, they were going to have to be more creative if they wanted the insults to actually hurt him. It was while listening to one such barb from Solas that the Inquisitor arrived.

There was a great deal of elves behind her, Dorian was guessing more than twenty. An assorted arrangement of all different types of elves, many of which seemed familiar to Dorian, but it couldn’t be, that was terribly unlikely. Unlikely as it may have been, it was true.

“Dorian!” A voice shouted from within the crowd of people. “Is that really you?”

Dorian stood up from the table and took a step closer to the approaching group. He didn’t notice the odd stares the inner circle members were sending him or the murmuring that had broken out within the crowd. No, his focus was on the woman who was running up to him, her long black hair flowing behind her. Before he could inspect her any longer arms had wrapped around his neck and a face had pressed itself against his shoulder.

“I thought I’d never see you again, ma’ falon,” the woman said pulling away from him after a moment to take his face in her hands.

“Adavra?” Dorian asked, not really believing what he was seeing.

She snorted. “Who else, you silly man.”

Dorian thought about rebutting her, but couldn’t bring himself to do it. “Amicus, you’re looking well.” And she did. Long gone was that choppy hair replaced by long tresses that were full of intricate braids. Her face had filled out some and the circles under her eyes weren’t as dark.

“Well I should since you got me out of Tevinter.”

Dorian made a noncommittal noise. “I may have done that, but life has a way of still being cruel, and I lost touch with you after I got you out and then, well…”

She leaned her forehead against his. “It’s okay, we’re better, safe thanks to you.” She pulled away and gave him a bright smile. “But I have some people I’d like you to meet.”

Dorian tilted his head and watched as she walked back over to the crowd of elves who were all smiling at him. He was feeling increasingly overwhelmed, especially now that he looked at them all. Here was some of the physical proof that he’d actually made a difference in Tevinter. That he’d made something better.

Before he could dwell on it more, two little elves were suddenly in front of him, Adavra standing proudly behind them. “Dorian, I’d like you to meet my children.”

Dorian stared for a moment before slowly crouching down to their level. “Hello there,” he said softly. “My name is Dorian, I met your mother a long time ago.” Almost six years ago.

The littlest one on the right giggled happily. “Mamae,” he said, running around Adavra’s legs.

Dorian chuckled and nodded his head. “Yes, she’s a fine woman.”

Adavra laughed and made a motion with her hand. “No Elana, make a friend,” she said before turning her attention to her son. “Go ahead, Balinor, he won’t bite.”

The oldest, Balinor walked right up to him before circling around him and climbing on his back. It took a moment for Dorian to readjust himself into a standing position so he wouldn’t fall over but he didn’t try to get the boy to leave. “Comfortable?” he asked, turning his head to the side.

The boy nodded his head. “Eth,” he mumbled before tucking his face in between Dorian’s shoulder blades.

While Dorian wasn’t sure what the boy had said, the little gasp of the Inquisitor gave him a rough idea. “Well yes you just stay there, do you wish to join him?” he asked, looking at the girl.

Elana ran back to him with a little shriek of laughter and wrapped her little arms around his arm where she proceeded to swing herself on. If she was heavier, Dorian likely would have minded, but she was light and having fun, who was he to stop her.

“What’s going on here?” Karis asked, her face beyond puzzled.

Dorian had forgot that they weren’t alone in the Great Hall. He turned to look at his fellow companions, all of which had a different expression. He looked at Bull who looked both incredibly sappy and like he wanted to laugh.

“My apologies, Inquisitor,” Dorian said. “I just haven’t seen them in a long time.”

“You’ve met them before?” Karis asked.

“As his slaves no doubt,” Solas muttered. Why the elf was so angry at him, Dorian would never know. It was just pushing all his distaste for Tevinter on one person.

Adavra sent Solas a glare. “Dorian is a vhenallin,” she said. “He got our masters to release us.”

Karis gave him a bewildered look. “How’d you manage that?”

“Espionage of course,” Dorian said.

“You were a spy, Dorian?” Leliana asked.

Bull laughed. “And after all that crap you gave me about being a spy,” he said.

“Oh I wasn’t a traditional spy, mind you,” Dorian said, hiking the sleepy child up higher on his back the best he could while Elana continue to twirl herself with one of his hands. “I seduced as many high ranking men as I could and once I’d exhausted them I’d gather as much information as I could and then store it for later use. It was only after I met Adavra that I thought of using the blackmail to get them to free their slaves.”

“He singlehandedly started an emancipation, in Tevinter no less,” one of the elves, Illaros he believed was his name.

“Oh don’t flatter me, and by that I mean do so as much as you like,” Dorian said, as he slowly made his way back to the table. “Though I do have a reputation to uphold.”

“Being the temptress of Skyhold now?” Adavra asked with a sly grin.

Dorian gave Bull a soft look. “No, my heart belongs to my Amatus now.”

A few of the elves stood straighter at hearing the phrase and directed hard looks at Bull. It was admirable that Bull only fidgeted in his seat under their heavy gaze. “Kadan, people are going to think you’re getting soft,” Bull said.

Dorian scoffed as he finally sat down, Elana seated happily next to him and Balinor still clinging to his back. “You’re soft, you great lummox.” Bull just threw back his head and laughed.

“Bull, was it?” Adavra asked, sitting herself beside the Qunari.

“The Iron Bull, actually,” Bull corrected starting to pile food on his and Dorian’s plates.

“Alright, the Iron Bull, you’re in a relationship with Dorian, yes?”

Bull gave her a dopy smile. “Yeah, we have our something.”

Dorian smiled at hearing that. Both weren’t really sure how a relationship worked, but they were learning as they went.

“Well, I just want to let you know that if you ever hurt Dorian with this something of yours, not only will my revenge come swiftly, but I will see your blood on my blade and I will rally every one of us up to tear into you until not even the Dread Wolf would take you. Do I make myself clear?”

There was a sudden coughing fit down the table but Bull was staring with wide eyes at Adavra. “I’ll keep that in mind,” Bull said. “I don’t plan on letting him go unless he wants to leave, he’s my heart after all.”

Adavra’s stern face turned into a pleased smile. “That’s wonderful, pass the rolls?” Bull hurriedly grabbed the basket and let Adavra pick which one she wanted. “Thank you.”

Bull cursed softly under his breath before turning his attention back to Dorian who was cutting little pieces of his food up and feeding it to the elves that had attached themselves to him. “Kadan, you have some fierce friends.”

Dorian hummed softly. “Yes, I’m well aware. If it’s any consolation, you’ve made me the happiest I’ve ever been, so you don’t have much to worry about, Amatus.”

“That’s good to hear.”

[eirenix]

♛ 😃😃😃

[ ♛ ] send me a url | accepting!

my opinion on;

character in general: When I first played the game, I was sort of indifferent to Flynn, I’m sorry to say! It was actually YOU, Megan, that made me love him so much! Your endless babbling about his depth and how much you love him made me truly appreciate him! Now when I see him my heart gets warm and I want to hug him he is so good, so purehow they play them: Flynn, like all of Megan’s muses, is so on point it’s scary! She writes him so well, it’s like I’m playing the game again - I hear his voice in every line, get war flash backs to the xbox controllers… the mun: Once upon a time, I wrote a novel about Megan for a meme like this - it got to 2000 words. Megan is beyond precious to me - I became friends with her almost four years ago when we bonded over idols and emimaru….it was destiny I think. We’re so likeminded it’s hwoegew?? She is beautiful inside and out. I can imagine my life without air easier than my life without her. I can’t even put it into words how happy I am to have you back here, writing with me again. It’s like a piece of me was missing.

do i;

follow them: On every blog until the day I die - no even after thatrp with them: I try to rp with her but I think she’s trying to drown me with her novels? This is not yet confirmed but rather, a solid theory,,want to rp with them: Always and forevership their character with mine: Not Flynn and Martel (yet) but who knows….Megan is my shipping partner for everything 

what is my;

overall opinion: I got to meet her in real life once and I almost started crying - idk if you knew that Megan oop…..anyway, I love her

**Note: Mun’s answer are all to be completely honest. Don’t send url if you don’t want brutal honesty.

[daniedoodles]

Danie’s Dilemmas Ep. 26: Books Closed

Today of all days, I’ll Always Remember You by Hannah Montana could not be taken more seriously. It’s the last day of senior year. In spite of how much I anticipated to cry on this day, I actually didn’t, possibly because I’ve thought about it so often for the last two months (or maybe it’s because my last diploma isn’t until this Thursday so really, everyone’s last day is slightly different). I have so much to say, but none all at once. This has been said time and time again, but I feel like for most of high school, we had the tendency to take it for granted; we all wanted to drop out or give up at some point because it just felt like there was nothing about our experiences that implied that eventually, it would get better. All those times complaining about homework or cramming for exams... except now that it’s over, we can’t help but focus on the good parts about it that have also come to an end, most of which were moments spent with friends doing dumb shit lmao. 2019 so far has proven to be one of the most bizarre years thus far. I’ve spent time with people that I never thought I would get the chance to, endured the most UNserious exam season, and now, the most UNserious last day of school. Since I was not remotely prepared to face the last day in terms of taking the opportunity to formally thank all of the people that made high school as fun as it has been, I thought I’d kill two birds with one stone and mention them on this episode :) And yes, I will be mentioning names. We’re NOT in high school anymore so there’s no need to play guessing games. 

Vicky: I never know how to start these things without making it sound cringey or sappy, but bitch we have been THROUGH it. Regardless of how we’ve managed to not get into a single class together throughout the entire three years we’ve spent in high school, we somehow managed to stay hella close which you should know by now, I am incredibly grateful for. I haven’t exactly been as active with the group, but that’s only because I know we have all of summer ahead of us to make up for it. Just know that I’m always going to be here to be the voice of reason, but also your partner in crime. We’ve laughed too loud and cried too hard over the dumbest shit, taken bomb ass photos and eaten too much food. I’m so excited for what other dumb shit we can do together. When you’re out on your own adventures, pls text me so I know you’re not dead. I love you, my favourite rat. OwO

Alex: Whew, sis. We came together on the oddest terms, talking about failed love interests and all that bs, but aren’t you glad that it happened? Otherwise, we wouldn’t have had that deep talk at the ridge, wouldn’t have realized how similar we were in terms of how bad we are with gaining closure lmao. I’ve never felt more comfortable to cry as hard as I have about the death of a fictional character as I have been with you, and that speaks volumes because I hate crying in front of other people. Last summer was by far one of the best summers I have ever experienced and I’m grateful to have spent a majority of it with you. Thanks for saving my ass when I snuck out of the house that one time and for staying up and feeding me after I got back from being out until 3am. Now that school’s out, let’s get on that mf tanning grinddddddd. ily bitch. I swear, I feel like I have I lot more to say for you but right now I’m coming up blank. But I feel like you already know what else there is that I have to say... if not, I’m saving it for your birthday (hurry up and be 18 already goddamn). 

Laureen: Laureen you already know we’re on the same wavelength lmao. Even though I feel like I see you the least of all in the group, it’s comforting to know that it doesn’t lessen the integrity (sorry to give u ptsd from the diploma) of our friendship. Being born on days that are so close together really be hitting us different. I swear, there have been so many times where we’re just thinking about the exact same thing, which is both cool and creepy. LIKE OUR GOD TALKS OMF. Seeing that we’re both the moms of the group, we gotta stick together to take care of our crackhead children. But fr, I trust you with everything. My future children, my own life, my phone, my butler ;) How are you not my emergency contact, honestly? We need to have a car talk and see what comes out of that. There is so much more I have to fill you in on. (also don’t forget about clubbing next Thursday eeooow). 

Joscelynn: Let me tell you, Joscelynn, how big of a blessing it is to have you live so close to me. Out of everything that you’ve done for me, I think the one I’m most grateful for is for the time that you “broke” into my house to check if I unplugged my straightener LMAOO... or that time when you just hugged me while I was breaking down in the washroom at the end of the day where I had a test for all four periods. As much as I don’t know who most of your tea is about, it’s nice to know that you’re comfortable to confide in me and the whole group about all kinds of things, even when we don’t ask for the kind of detail you provide HAHAHAHA. Also, thanks for always coming in clutch with all the board games. Much love, Pennywise. <3

Diane: I know we sort of hit a wall with our friendship at one point, but I’m really happy that we were still able to recover from it and rekindle our friendship. I understand that the circumstance is all different now, and we aren’t as attached to one another as we once were back in junior high, but I think there’s some good in that because we were able to grow at our own pace. Although we have to admit that we did grow a little bit apart as well in the process, I like that we are both still able to reminisce fondly on the moments we’ve shared in the past. You’re one of the brightest minds I know :). I feel like I never told you enough but I always appreciated how easily you could bring a smile to people’s faces. Yeah, keep doing it. If you ever need to vent, I’m only a 4-minute scooter ride away. 

Anna: Holy shit sis, idek where to begin. You’re by far the biggest reason why I was able to haul my ass through to the end of high school. If you didn’t look out for my water intake, or the little errors in my calculations... I don’t even want to imagine it. You’ve done so much for me and have had to endure all of my shit that I can’t encapsulate it all into a single letter. I can’t thank you enough for all the memes that have made me piss myself on countless occasions, no matter how old they were nor how often I would look back on it, for recommending me to the program that will finally release me from the constraints of the status of being a “broke ass bitch”, for staying up with me discussing all kinds of things from the environment and ethics, to fortunes, astrology, love, and TEA. We’ve both seen each other at our most vulnerable and beaten down state (which is literally every English class), and we’ve celebrated each other’s triumphs, but most importantly, laughed at our failures (English, again omg). I can’t help but get emotional whenever I think of how you’re gonna be leaving soon for UBC, but it’s not like that’s going to affect how often we keep in touch anyways lol. We can’t just have the kettle always overflow, you know? Fr tho, I’m big fucking sad about you leaving, but I’m also so proud of how far you’ve come. I really don’t know how tf I’m supposed to be able to cope with suddenly not seeing you everyday. Ugh, ew I’m crying now but as I was saying, thank you for everything. I can’t wait to get those dream recorders out on the market after we’ve gathered all the knowledge on neuro/psych and business so we don’t have to wake up in the middle of the night and write out the dreams in our notes anymore. I’ll miss you a fuck ton ON GOD. 

Cheyenne: Cheyenne!! I’m so glad I met you and Anna when I did :)) we made the best chemistry lab group, we basically made titration our mf bitch. There was always so much comfort in knowing that we were all on the same page about not getting assignments done on time for English lmao. You just hear that sigh of absolute relief. I’m happy to have become close enough with you for you to be able to trust me with all the stuff you’ve spilt, and for reading your cards when you need them read. I can’t wait for all of us to actually do shit together this summer, I don’t even understand how we let the summers prior pass us like that. In all seriousness though, Cheyenne, you’re so kind and genuine, I’m glad we’ve gotten a lot closer this year. After summer, I guess I’ll be seeing you around campus!! 

Yuan: Bitch, hay nako. Where to start? I don’t think I’ve ever been quiet OR in a bad mood after hanging out with you. I’m glad that I was able to count on you to distract me from getting any work done in class and for getting photos of mee sleeping. Grabe, nakakabwiset HAHAHAHA. Actually though, I don’t think we’ve been close-close up until recently but I’m still so happy that we are now kasi ang saya mong kasama. Not a lot of people can convince me to speak Tagalog so already that says something. Basta, I’ll keep this short cause it’s not like we’re not seeing each other over the summer. We’ve got a lot of time to make more memories. Pwede nang uminom (thank God). Thanks for all the laughs, and for keeping up with the bullshit I write on this page lol. 

Joaquin: Hey, “best friend” wassup?? We haven’t been close for long either. In fact, we’ve barely just hit the 2-week mark of our friendship. But I will say that that was the most last minute transition from acquaintance - close friend. Even though we’ve been in at least one class together during each of the three years, we weren’t necessarily on active talking terms... until now. Thus far, every moment I’ve spent with you and Yuan, or just you, have all been for the books. I don’t think I’ve laughed as much as I had on that one day that we went to Southcentre. Already I can say that you’re one of the greatest people I know: generous, kindhearted, hilarious, and with a great taste in music. I’m excited for whatever it is that ends up happening in the summer, spontaneous or planned, I can’t wait. :D Ps. Thanks for getting me out of the house lol.

Jay: James, bruh. We haven’t been in touch lately, but I feel like you already know what’s coming to you, considering a majority of my indirects to you are basically just going to get reiterated right at this moment. Always know that I genuinely appreciate all of the deep talks we’ve had in the past and that you’re one of the few people I trust to openly express my thoughts to. I hope everything with tennis continues to go well, and that we get to catch up soon ‘cause lowkey it has been TOO long since we’ve last talked-talked.  

Maxine: Max, by the time you’re back on social media, you’re probably never gonna see this because it’s going to be buried so deep into my feed and I know that you’re too lazy to scroll that far down, but I’m gonna write it anyway. We’ve been friends for awhile now, and only now, in our second semester of senior year, did we manage to get into the same class ever since junior high, and it’s safe to say that there has never been a dull moment with you... to the point where I’m pretty sure we made the teacher hate us. I don’t know why you were so set on saying goodbye today when we literally live in the same community and have each other’s numbers, but aight lol. Max, you really be the OG out here. Every time we talk we can’t help but reminisce on how much we sucked ass at opening our own lockers in grade 7 and to this day it still cracks me tf up. Thank you for dealing w my bs after all this time, and for letting me stay at your place before and after school in junior high. ily  

Jerry and Cam: Y’all we go WAYYY back. Even though you guys didn’t attend school at bob, I still wanted to make a point of thanking the both of you for reconnecting. Plus, this is one of the few opportunities I have to acknowledge the support of my audience (LMFAO) so I thought “why not?”. We’ve only hung out once since February (or March? idek), but that’s definitely gotta change now that we’ve got a lot more free time. Y’all know where to find me when you need advice/opinions/someone to talk to when you’re bored/a tour guide to the boring south lmao (or maybe not that.. I lack street smarts). 

That’s it. I’m also probably going to email my teachers because I did not have the time nor the energy to do anything before the last day of school so that’s how they’re going to get it. Is this what it means to be eco-friendly?? Writing emails instead of actual handwritten cards??? I mean.. okay I guess. 

In conclusion, ending the senior year is bittersweet. If there’s anything I’ve learned from going through it all, it’s that you should get all your shit over with in your grade 10 and 11 years, so you’ll be cruisin by senior year. Also, don’t deprive yourself of hanging out with friends. That shit sucks ass and you’ll regret it a lot. 

ps. just because high school is ending, does NOT mean that this is the end of Danie’s Dilemmas. You really think the tea’s gonna stop there??

For now. 

Keep up. 

x