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lyinginmeadow · 16 hours ago
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Breakaway II. | hockey!Azriel x reader
It is finally here! Thank you all for being patient, hope the wait was worth it <3
Part I. Summary: Your brother finds out about your relationship with Azriel and he's less than fond of it. Will he come to terms with it before he ruins his relationship with his best friend and sister?
Word count: 2,7k
Warnings: Rhysand is an asshole in this one (I still love him, tho), swearing, angst, violence
A/N: I gave the reader a name, I couldn't leave her as Y/N, sorry. I tried to tag all of you, but some blogs weren’t found :((
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Going on the ice after everything went to shit was not ideal. The whole team was nervous, Cassian tried to make jokes to lighted the mood, but to no avail. Rhysand wasn’t paying any attention to him. But he was pissed. Azriel never saw him this pissed. It was clear as day that the teamwork they had built over the years had just crumbled as if it were a house made of carts. And it was his fault.
‘’What’s the matter, pretty boy? Girl trouble?’’ Taunted Eris while all the players returned to the ice. His eyes flickered between Azriel and the tribunes were you were sitting. You were not looking at him, which made Az even more anxious. Instead, all your attention was on Rhysand who was returning it.
‘’Fuck off.’’ Azriel snarled, not willing to pay him any mind. Eris was trying to get rise out of him. It was how he always played. Usually, Azriel didn’t take the bait but with everything going on, Eris was getting on his last nerve.
‘’Aw, if you need her off your hands, I’ll gladly be of service.’’ He continued. Azriel clench his jaw. Thankful for the puck being dropped in the center to mark the start of the last period, he tried to shake off everything that plagued his mind and focus solely on the game.  
The last period was an utter disaster. Rhysand completely ignored every advantage Azriel made. It was becoming absurd. He knew he fucked up by not telling him about the two of you, but this was just Rhysand being Rhysand. Insufferable. Rhysand was his friend and he made it clear that you were off-limits. But Azriel couldn’t help it when it came to you. You were like a breath of fresh air. He couldn’t imagine not being with you, not wanting and loving you.
Rhys loved you and Az knew he would never hold anything against you, except for the lying. Rhys hated lying with his whole heart. All you two wanted was to share something that was exclusively yours. He also knew that you two were just trying to avoid the inevitable which he regretted. The stolen moments now tainted with this ridiculous feud. Worst of all, Azriel didn’t know how you would react to the news and he was terrified. What if you wanted nothing to do with him in order to avoid ruining the relationship with your brother?
As Eris went for the puck, Azriel snapped out of it, flying after him instead, silent as the night. He was quick, but Azriel was quicker. Everyone knew that no one on that damned rink could outskate him. But that didn’t stop Eris from trying. The game was tied, and everyone was on the verge of their seats. Azriel smiled as he neared the player, just as Eris reached the attacking zone, Azriel skated right in front of him and crouched to bodycheck Eris. He went flying right over Azriel landing on the ice with a sickening crunch. ‘’Ups.’’
Eris screamed in pain as he clutched his injured hand. Azriel usually wasn’t one to hurt his opponents, he was not a defenseman, but with everything that went to hell that day, he just couldn’t let Eris mess with his head any more than he already did. Eris finally stood up with the help of his teammates who glared in Azriel’s way, leaving the Cavaliers without one of their best players.
It was a miracle he didn’t get a penalty, but he did get booed by Cavalier’s fans. Technically, the bodycheck wasn’t against the rules. It was just unfortunate how Eris landed on his hand with his whole body weight. Some could say it was his own fault he didn’t know how to stick a landing. But Azriel couldn’t act as if he was sorry, because he simply wasn’t. That bastard deserved it. He played dirty more than once, it was time for him to finally get a taste of his own medicine. Judging by Cassian’s expression he approved. Usually, Cassian was the one to brutally bodycheck his opponents. The nickname Lord of Bloodshed, which he earned from the fans, made Azriel chuckle more than once.   
As the puck hit the ice once again, he didn’t wait for Rhys to claim the opportunity instead, when one of the opponents passed the puck, he interjected it, claiming it for himself. He glanced at the clock, realizing there were only ten more seconds in this match. He glided swiftly across the ice,  dodging other players as he reached the attack zone he smashed the puck with his stick. It wasn’t the clearest shot, but somehow it bypassed their goalie earning Velaris U a winning point. The horn rang announcing the goal. The tribunes erupted in cheers, but Az didn’t feel like celebrating.
When the Cavaliers went around to congratulate the winning team, Azriel grabbed Eris’s uninjured hand more tightly than was necessary. The player returned to the rink just for the handshakes, which Azriel did not expect. But he guessed that Eris was more of a diplomat than he believed him to be. ‘’Talk about her again, and I will break more than just your wrist.’’ He let go of his hand with a tight smile.
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Usually, a win made him feel proud. All the hard work they – he – put in paid off. He loved celebrating with his teammates, and the camaraderie that came with the territory. But there was nothing to celebrate. They barely won and it was his fault.
‘’I hope you packed because you’re benched till the end of the season.’’ Rhys snarled when they left the locker room.
‘’What are you talking about?’’ Azriel whipped his head around to find the source of the interruption. He didn’t want you to be subjected to any of this, even though he knew there was no way around this conversation.  That was what got them in this mess. That and Rhys being a complete asshole.
‘’Stay out of this, Velaria.’’ Rhys signed pinching the bridge of his nose. You looked between the two most important people in your life frowning.
‘’You kicked him off the team, didn’t you? Are you serious?’’
‘’Veli…’’ Azriel started. ‘’No, Az. He’s being ridiculous. He can’t do that!’’ You yelled in frustration throwing your hands up.
‘’I can and I already did. And I don’t want you anywhere near him.’’
‘’You can’t boss me around, Rhysand. I’m not your child.’’ She snarled poison seeping through your clenched teeth.
‘’No, but you’re my sister and I will not sit around idly watching you get hurt.’’
‘’I wouldn’t hurt her, ever. And I won’t leave her, not until she says otherwise.’’
‘’You will if you know what’s good for you.’’ They stared each other down. ‘’That’s enough. We’re leaving.’’ You shot daggers in your brother’s direction as you took Azriel’s hand in yours. He looked as if he wanted to object, but you didn’t give him a chance, dragging him out of the stadium.
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Mentally drained after last night's shit show, you were grateful for an empty apartment. Azriel went to pick up a few of his stuff from Rhysand’s house leaving you alone with your thoughts. You groaned loudly when you heard the doorbell ringing, so much for a calm morning.
‘’What the actual fuck?’’ Yelled a voice as soon as you opened the door.
‘’Don’t you yell at me. I didn’t want you to find out like this.’’ You turned around after closing the door of your apartment. Thankfully none of your roommates were home to witness this escapade that was undoubtedly about to unfold. Even if you would appreciate the support, you were glad Azriel wasn’t here either. The match was enough of a fiasco that you didn’t want him to be subjected to any of this. Rhysand was your brother and his hissy fits were yours to take care of.
‘’No, Velaria, you didn’t want me to find out at all.’’
’Well, I’m sorry. What else do you want me to say? I mean, look at how you’re reacting. It’s ridiculous. I am my own person, I’m an adult and I can make my own decisions. Who are you to tell me, that they are wrong, hm?’’ You were staring him down. This whole situation was blown out of proportion. But that was how Rhysand operated. Nothing concerning him was ever subtle.
‘’He sleeps around, don’t you remember how he went after Mor? Or Elain for that matter? He will dump you once you stop being exciting to him. Which I imagine will be soon now that your little charade is over.’’
‘’He’s your best friend!’’ You exclaimed.
‘’Exactly! That means I know him. You’re my sister. He’s not good for you!’’
‘’You don’t know him like I do.’’ You kept defending Azriel. It hurt you beyond belief to drive a rift between them. Ever since they met, they had been practically inseparable. You never imagined that Rhys could act like this towards someone who he considered important.
‘’He will break your fragile heart.’’
‘’My fragile little heart can take it. But what it cannot and will not tolerate is how you handled last night. I don’t want to see you unless you want to apologize.’’ With that, you pushed gaping Rhysand out of the door and smashed it in his face. He didn’t deserve any more of your time after the stunt he pulled.
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The sound of a motorcycle pulled you out of your trance. ‘’Shit.’’ You gathered yourself from the floor wiping the tears and running to the bathroom to spray cold water on your face to help with the puffiness.
‘’I’m back!’’ Azriel yelled as you wiped your hands dry.
‘’Would you believe that he was not there? Also, Cassian says hi. He was very dramatic about me moving out.’’ You could hear the chuckle from your bedroom. He opened the door to your bedroom, his expression falling after taking just one look at you.
‘’Hey, hey…What’s wrong, love?’’ He crossed the room swiftly, his hands gently coming up to your face. You signed at your unsuccessful attempt to hide your emotions from him. He was always great at finding out other people’s secrets.
‘’I would imagine he was not there when he was here.’’ You whispered unwilling to hold his gaze, looking at anything else but him.
‘’What did he say?’’
‘’Pretty much the same as yesterday. He’s such a child, Az.’’ You said in a defeated tone. ‘’I’m so sorry, sweetheart.’’ He caressed your cheek finally making you lift your gaze to him to see the small smile he offered.
‘’No, it’s not your fault. Can we just…Not talk about this? Please. I want some sense of normalcy back.’’ Your tired eyes closed for a second to collect your thoughts.   
‘’Well, I did get you something I know you would like before coming back.’’ That made you open your eyes, eyebrows shooting up in surprise.
‘’Really?’’ Your eyes shined which in return made his smile grow even bigger. ‘’Mhm.’’ He nodded, turning to pick up the bag off the floor. As he took the items out, a smell of fresh pastries filled the whole room making you melt instantly.
‘’You got me strawberry shortcake?’’ You squealed like a little child on Christmas day.
‘’From your favorite pastry shop.’’
‘’But that’s on the other side of the city.’’
‘’And? I would go to the end of the world just so I could see this smile.’’ Your lips wobbled tears threatening to spill out of the corners of your eyes. You launched at him nearly knocking him to the floor. He laughed catching you in a tight embrace.
‘’Thank you, Az.’’
‘’Don’t mention it.’’ You looked up eyes filled with tenderness reserved just for him.
‘’I love you, you know that?’’ His thumb found your cheek to caress it. ‘’I love you too, sweetheart.’’ He kissed you deeply, and every worry melted away just for a while.
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It had been two weeks since the incident at the game and Azriel was still living at your apartment. The girls were not ecstatic at first, but his breakfasts with excellent coffee changed their minds rather quickly. You had fallen into a routine getting used to having him around and waking up next to him. It was nice, you could even imagine yourself one day living with Azriel in quiet suburbs.
‘’Velaria…’’ A voice interrupted the trail of your thoughts as you moved through the crowded halls of the campus. ‘’No, I don’t want to hear it.’’ You continued walking trying to ignore him. The day started great and you intended to keep it that way without Rhysand interfering.
‘’Please-, come on, stop. Please. You were right, okay? You were right and I want to apologize.’’ You halted, your eyebrows shooting up. Rhys had a personal problem with apologizing so this came as a surprise.
‘’I’m listening.’’ You sized him up not willing to give him anything for free.
‘’I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have lashed out like that. It wasn’t my place. I shouldn’t have said those things about Azriel. He is my friend and if anyone is right for you, it would be him.’’ He stopped as if he was gathering his thoughts. ‘’I…I want you to know, that I do trust your judgment. I was just scared. You’re all grown-up but to me, you’ll always be my little sister, who needed my protection from spiders and snails.’’ Rhysand, unlike you, always looked everyone in the eyes. It may have been an intimidation tactic in most cases. But not to you, never to you, in this case, you believed he wanted you to see the regret in his eyes. And it worked because your own softened unwillingly.  
‘’Rhys…You know I will always need you. But this whole thing. You can’t do that. Ever.’’
‘’I know. And I am incredibly sorry I did, I can’t take it back even if I wanted to. And trust me, I wish I could.’’ You simply nodded thinking over his apology. ‘’I think I still need time. It hurt me what you said.’’ Resting a hand on his shoulder you gave him a light squeeze.
‘’Could you ask Azriel to stop by? I want to apologize to him, too. But I can’t seem to get hold of him. It’s like he knows how to blend in with shadows.’’ You chuckled. Azriel did have that superpower. He told you he was trying to stay out of Rhysand’s radar to not cause a bigger rift between the two of you.
‘’I’ll try my best. If you promise to let him be on the team again.’’ You bargained knowing fully well that Azriel would probably refuse a couple of times, but eventually, he would relent. He missed the rink and his teammates way too much to not come back.
‘’That’s a given. I shouldn’t have kicked him off in the first place.’’
‘’Exactly. Now I would love to chat, but I do need to get to biophysics, or the professor will kick my ass.’’
‘’We wouldn’t want that.’’ He chuckled. You hesitated for a little bit before offering him a quick hug. ‘’I missed you.’’ He smiled, he wasn’t willing to let you go, but you weren’t there quite yet, so he reluctantly let go. ‘’I missed you, too.’’ He returned the sentiment as you hurried through the halls to get to your seminar.
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The last game of the season was in full swing. The winner of this game would take home the title of Champions and they were so close to claiming it. We were winning only by one goal courtesy of Rhys, but there was still one minute left and the opposing team was eager to score to at least tie the game, leaving their net empty. They were close to scoring, but then Cassian interjected their shot sending it to the middle where Rhysand was. He literally dived for the puck hitting the ice and barely pushing it with his stick in Azriel’s way who skated as if his life depended on, the other player right on his skates. He didn’t hesitate as he shot the puck into an empty net. The crowd erupted in cheers as did the commentators.
‘’They did it!’’ You squealed in cheer, jumping up, and hugging Nesta who was now on her feet as well. She smiled proudly hugging you back. ‘’Thankfully. I couldn’t handle their whining if they didn’t.’’ She rolled her eyes as you laughed. Looking back to the ice when Rhys hugged Azriel and Cassian ruffing their hair. You smiled fondly. Everything turned out great in the end.    
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Taglist: @lilah-asteria , @fourthwing4ever , @acourtofbatboydreams , @kylaisra , @starswholistenanddreamsanswered, @honethatty12 , @acrawford6173
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keymeadoww · 3 months ago
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Outed
Title: Outed
Pairing: Felix Graham de Vanily x m! Reader
Warnings: secret relationship, betrayal of trust, blurting out secrets, panic attack, forced outing, argument, angst, semi-sweet ending? Ooc Felix bc im a sucker for "bad boys" turned soft, Chloe is REALLY evil (this is def not something she’d actually do but for the plot y'know) reader likes boys but sexuality is not strictly mentioned
Word Count: 3.7k
a/n: Its long but tbh this is not one of my better works omg
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The night air shone in the sky as you stared into his eyes. He was on his side beside you, his hand trailing shapes on your arms as the two of you just stared at each other. A small smile grew on your face as you admired his eyes. The green shone against the pale red pillow case he was propped against. You were so happy that he was here for the weekend.
Felix returned the soft smile and moved his hand to cup your face. “Mon amour.” He whispered. This was the only time he was truly free. When he wasn’t with you, he was pretending to be someone he wasn’t. Everyone knew him as a bad guy, one who didn’t acknowledge others’ feelings, but he was more than that. He was an incredible person with such a big heart who just had some trouble showing it. “What are you thinking about?”
You were quiet for a minute, remaining star-struck by his eyes. “Just how beautiful you are.” You murmured, quieter than a whisper where only he could hear you. He laughed quietly, leaning over to press his lips to your nose for a brief moment. “I love you.”
“I love you.” He stared into your eyes for a moment longer. “I wanted to talk to you.” He said suddenly. You nodded, sitting up in the bed as he followed suit. “You know I love you a lot, right?”
You nodded, hiding a grin, “Yeah? This is an awful way to break up with me.” You joked.
Felix’s eyes widened and he shook his head, “No, no, no, nothing like tha-” He stopped when he heard your laugh. He blinked for a moment before rolling his eyes. “Ha ha.” His hands grasped yours suddenly. “Amour, I wanted to ask you a few things.” You gave him your undivided attention, nodding to his words. “I wanted to ask you to come over to my house for Christmas this year.” 
“Me?”
“Yes, you.” He chuckled. “My mother will be there. I- I want to introduce you to her.”
You blinked in surprise, “Introduce me to your mother? As your boyfriend?” 
Felix hesitated before nodding. “Yes, amour. I want to spend the rest of my life with you. To do that, you need to meet my mother.”
You stared at him. It wasn’t that you didn’t want to meet his mother; on the contrary, you were ecstatic that he wanted to tell his mother about you! It was just… you had never come out to anyone besides Felix before. It scared you. He noticed the way you were hesitating, immediately moving his thumb over your knuckles. “Please, don’t feel pressured. You don’t have to say yes.”
“Baby, I want to.” You replied, feeling horribly guilty. “I just- I’m scared. I haven’t come out to anyone yet.”
He smiled, leaning his forehead against yours, “Nor have I. We don’t have to tell everyone. Perhaps, just my mother? Then we can move on to your parents when you’re ready. Or, we can wait a bit longer before we tell anyone. I want you to be comfortable.”
You felt like crying. He was truly one of the most understanding people you knew. “I- I don’t want you to feel like I’m hiding you away.” You said in a whisper.
“I know you’re not. We’re in it for the long run, trust me.” He pressed his lips to your forehead gently. “We can talk more about it later. Let’s go to sleep.” He said, laying down beside you. You hesitated before following suit, facing him as you slowly drifted off to sleep.
The next few days were the same as usual. Felix had to return to London the next day, so you would wake up to an empty bed, go to school, come home, call Felix until you inevitably fell asleep on call, before waking up to do it all again. Throughout the days, you thought about what Felix had suggested. You truly did want to meet his mother. It was a huge step that you really wanted to take with him. But that overwhelming fear made you question everything.
Deciding to ask for some help, you pulled up your social media before switching accounts to a secret account. It was private, and everyone who was following it did not know who you were in person. There, you could rant about life as a closeted man liking men, ask for opinions, and share things you could never share with people you actually knew. 
You stared at the message you had typed to your followers, reading and rereading it over and over, trying to decide if you should actually post it. Glancing at the clock, you realized it was about the time Felix got out of classes for the day. After a silent debate, you sent the post, allowing your followers to see it before calling your boyfriend to talk about your day.
School the next day was boring, as usual. It was exhausting to go through classes that were so extremely boring, but it was a necessity to graduate. You went through the day, talking to friends as you passed them, but ultimately listening to music in the hallways between classes. At lunch, you grabbed a plate, turning off your music to find a seat beside your friends. Marinette greeted you with a grin as you sat across from her, between Alya and Mylene. 
“Hey! How’s classes going for you?” Marinette asked. Unlike the rest of the friend group, you were not in their class. You recounted the boring nature of your classes while joking about some funny incidents that happened (“Jorge tripped over the trash can and fell into the teacher! They both laughed about it in the end.” You added that last part when Marinette looked concerned.)
The trio around you laughed at your story as a loud fake cough echoed through the lunch room. You went quiet, looking around for the person who coughed. Surprisingly, Chloe Bourgeois stood on top of a table, holding her phone in front of her. “Ladies and gentleman, do I have a treat for you! One of our dear beloved classmates- one of our friends has been keeping a secret from us!” She called. The people around whispered about her statement. “I’m about to share those secrets!”
You saw Marinette froze and figured it was something about her and Adrien as Chloe pointed at our table. You froze however, when she said your name loud and clear. You thought about your life, secrets? You didn’t keep many secrets from your friends. The only one you could currently think of was your relationship and the fact that you liked men. Your eyes widened, praying it wasn’t that. How would she know about that!?
She sneered epically, “You have been fooling everyone. I know that at least some girls here have a crush on you.” Your heart stopped. Sure, you were attractive. Sure, you knew of at least two girls who seemed to like you more than a friend. You only told them you weren’t interested. “You act all flustered and tell them that ‘oh, I’m not interested!” She stepped off the table, stalking towards you. All eyes were on you now. “You wanna know why he wasn’t interested?” She asked the group. Chloe’s eyes narrowed, “Because he’s in a relationship!”
Marinette stood up behind you. “Why does that matter? Whoever the girl he’s in love with is, doesn’t matter to us. He doesn’t have to tell us who she is.” Marinette defended. You were still frozen to your seat, eyes wide as she unlocked her phone with a sinister grin.
“He posted this last night.” You couldn’t breathe. Your eyes became clouded. “Hey… i wanted your opinion with something, guys. I have a boyfriend… i know shocker. I haven’t told anyone yet. I haven’t told anyone that i like guys. But nobody that i know in person follows me on here so i think im good. Well… im terrified to come out. Im scared. But my boyfriend wants me to meet his mom. I want to meet his mom more than anything, but im scared to come out. He says its okay if we wait but i feel so guilty. I don’t want him to have to wait to tell his mom about me if he doesn’t want to, but i don’t know if im ready to come out yet. What do you guys think?” She reads from her phone. Word from word, it was exactly what you had posted last night.
You could hear yelling around you- some coming from Chloe, some from your friends beside you- but you couldn’t understand what they were saying. Your thoughts were loud- too loud. You could hear ringing. It was too loud to focus. Your mind was running rampant. You were frozen in your seat. You couldn’t move. You felt numb but also too aware. You couldn’t do anything and it scared you. A hand landed on your shoulder and you jumped, looking to the side wildly.
“Felix…?” You murmured, forgetting that he was in London and that his cousin (who looked an awful lot like him) went to this school. You saw Adrien’s eyes furrow in confusion before immediately shaking the thought away and hoisting you to your feet. You could barely move, but he helped you walk through the crowd and to the hallway. He kept beside you, helping you move farther and farther until he could no longer hear the arguments going on.
“Y/N? I need you to breathe.” Adrien said once he had found a place to let you sit down. “Come on, please. Here, I’ll count to four, and you breathe in. When I say four, hold it until I count to four again. Then release the breath for four seconds. It may take a moment.”
Without a word, you followed his instructions. You hadn’t noticed how low on breath you were, gasping as you took in your first full breath. After a few minutes, your breathing became regular. You were silent. Your mind still raced, but you could hear the building settling around you.
“Are you okay?”
You glanced up, looking directly at Adrien. “Adrien?” You murmured, “Y-Yeah, I’m-” You paused before your eyes teared up, “No. No, I’m not okay.” Your head fell onto your knees as you cried. You were horrified that your secret was revealed without your consent. You were horrified that everyone knew your secret. You were horrified that there was no easing into it (as one of your followers had suggested the previous night). You were horrified by everything going on. 
Adrien hesitated, “Yeah, that was a stupid question.” He moved to sit beside you. “Is- Is there anything I can do to help you? I know I can’t take the pain away, but maybe I can reassure you? Nobody is going to treat you any differently for liking guys.” He said. “It was absolutely disgusting what Chloe did. I don’t condone it in any way, but-”
“No, no but. It was a horrible thing to do. I feel… ruined. I feel like I can’t ever show my face anywhere again. My entire life has been invaded. My secrets have been shared with everyone. If Chloe sneaked into that account? She has every secret or feeling that I have felt since I made the account back in middle school.” You looked up, tears sliding down your face. “My choices have been taken away from me. I wasn’t ready. I’m not ready now. That was something about me that I was not ready to share with anyone besides my boyfriend. Now, everyone knows.” 
Adrien sighed, “You’re right. I’m sorry it happened. I wish I could have stopped her from saying that-”
“But you were curious what her grand secret was. I know how it works. You could have stopped her or at least tried to.” You knew it was unfair to pin some of the blame on Adrien, but your thoughts wouldn’t be quiet. You couldn’t pinpoint what you were thinking.
He paused, looking at you sadly, “I didn’t mean it like that.” He said quietly. “I just- I want to help you feel better.”
“I don’t think you can.”
Without another word, you stood up and walked to the front office. After seeing your face with streaked tears and fretting for a few moments, the receptionist called your parents, asking if you could go home early. Hearing how much you were crying, they agreed, worried about what had happened. 
Instead of heading straight home, you made your way to the Parc Monceau, where you had found a bench hidden behind some trees and bushes. It was a place where you could just release your emotions. The bench felt cold beneath you as you sat down. You breathed deeply at the feeling. It helped ground you. Your phone buzzed beside you as a text from Felix came through.
baby
this reminded me of you, so i bought it for you
(image attached)
The picture was of a very expensive watch (when you googled it later, it was 288€ [319$]) with an infinity sign behind the hands of the clock. It was breathtaking. You stared at the picture, praying it would make you feel better- less exposed. It did nothing to help your current mood. Without replying, you closed your phone, closing your eyes as you leaned back on the chair. You felt horrible. You felt another wave of emotions cloud over you. You felt like crying again. Why did this happen to you? You thought you were so careful when allowing people to follow your account. You made sure you didn’t know any of them.
After a few minutes, your phone buzzed again. Another text from Felix. You distantly remembered that he was out of school today for some reason.
baby
so far, today is going great. I got you so many
gifts while i was out. can’t wait to tell you��
about it
The sentiment made you tear up and cry once again. It was exhausting. You didn’t know what to do. You were a mess right now. You knew, you shouldn’t be alone during this time. But the idea of seeking someone out horrified you. What if they had heard about what Chloe did? What if they hadn’t? You didn’t know which was worse in this scenario. You felt overwhelmed and scared. Could you call your boyfriend? No. Though it seemed like a good idea, you felt horrible to bother him. He was having a good day, he said so himself. He didn’t need you to bring him down. He didn’t need to know how much of a mess today was for you. And, though you knew you wouldn’t truly be bothering him (he would walk out of an important board meeting for you), you couldn’t bring yourself to press the call button on your phone.
You sat in the park for hours, crying off and on. At one point, you had fallen asleep until a goose squawked from behind you, scaring you. When the sun had slowly begun to fall, you glanced at your phone again. Without you noticing, Felix had called five times and sent a multitude of texts, as well as two voice messages. You sighed softly, feeling even worse for ignoring him. You clicked on the texts first.
baby
yeah so many great things for you
and for both of us. I got us some matching rings
oh yeah i also have a surprise to tell you about! call
me when you get out of class
Then, hours later.
baby
did you get detention or smthn? you’ve never been this late to a call.
its okay lol just lmk 
are you okay? its been a little bit, you’re definitely out of
class or detention now
my cousin called me saying you called him felix at lunch
he refused to elaborate, and just asked me to check on you and asked how you knew who i was 
what happened? mon amour, i can see that you read my previous messages.
talk to me or im coming down there. 
You frowned, internally cursing your blonde friend for involving his cousin. You sighed softly, clicking on the first voicemail. “Y/N? Seriously, it's okay if you don’t want to talk, but you have to tell me. Just let me know you’re okay and safe. My father made quite a few enemies that traversed down to me. I just want to make sure you're okay.” The second message was clicked as you stared at the grass below your feet. There was rustling in the background. “Hey, just call me? Text me? Anything?” There was a lady in the background asking for his passport. After a rustle, he returned to the voicemail. “Mon amour, I’m heading to Paris. I hope I’m not being too rash, but you haven’t missed a call the entire time I’ve known you, much less when we were dating.”
Tears welled once again and you cursed yourself for being so sensitive. You went to stand up, only to feel your phone vibrating in your hands. You glanced down. Felix was calling. With a deep breath, you answered. 
“Oh, thank god.” You immediately heard him say with a deep sigh. “Where are you?” He asked, his worried tone coming through clear as day.
“At the park.” You said quietly, trying to hide the fact that you had been sobbing all day. “I’m heading to my house soon, though. It’s okay.”
“Are you okay?” He asked. You could hear a door open and close from his side. “Which park are you in?”
You breathed out deeply, “It doesn’t matter. I’m going to head home soon. Just a little longer.”
“It does matter. Tell me what park, please, mon amour.” You could hear the desperation in his voice. You had never heard him like this before. He was extremely worried, it seemed. He noted the sudden silence. “Y/N, please. We don’t have to talk if you don’t want to. I won’t even approach you if you don’t want me to. I just want to make sure you're safe.”
“I’m fine.” I repeated. My voice rose a bit, allowing a voice crack to interrupt my words.
The call went quiet, the rustling of clothes was no longer audible- he had stopped moving. “Are- Are you crying? Let me help you. Tell me which park you’re at before I search them all.” 
With a sigh, you relented. “Parc Monceau.” You heard him pause on the other end, his clothes rustled as he spun a few times before beginning to walk again. “You don’t have to come to me.”
“You’re upset.” He stated as if it was obvious, “Why wouldn’t I come to you? Don’t hang up the phone.” 
“Felix… this is all my fault, you don’t have to pity me.”
Felix scoffed, “Pity you? Is that what you think I’m doing? Why would I pity my boyfriend? I don’t pity you. I want to help you feel better because when you hurt, it hurts me. I love you. Just let me in.” You stayed quiet, thinking over his words. You felt… bad. You wanted to let him in. You knew you should. You sighed softly, not replying to his statement. “Do you want to tell me what’s going on?”
“Not particularly.” You replied, closing your eyes. “I don’t want to think about it.” He was quiet for a moment until there was another rustling on his end.
“I’m at the park. Where are you?” You gave him your location with another deep sigh before hanging up the phone. Your eyes scanned the area in front of you before you saw the leaves on the bush in front of you shake lightly. You closed your eyes tightly as you heard his footsteps come closer before you felt him sit beside you.
“Mon amour?” He whispered quietly. You took a deep breath, trying not to break out in tears again. “Look at me, my love.” After you refused, he slowly lifted your head with his finger. “Please?” Your eyes opened slowly to meet his green ones. His eyes held nothing but love and concern for you. “What happened?”
“I-” You hesitated before lowering your eyes once more. This time, he let you look away. “I had a bad day.”
He scoffed, “You think?” You laughed sadly and shook your head.
“Yeah, uh, after we talked a few days ago, when you asked me to come over for Christmas to meet you mom.” His brows furrowed in concern. “Well, I’ve been thinking about it a lot since then. And- I have a private account that I use to help me figure things out, right? Well, Chloe somehow found the account and followed me without me realizing it was her. And, when I posted my dilemma about whether I should come out or not because I don’t feel ready but I want to tell your mom about us.” He nodded along. “Well, Chloe saw the post and decided to read it out loud for everyone in my school to hear.” You saw his eyes harden and his jaw clench.
“What?” He hissed, “She did that to you? I’m going to make her life hell.”
You shook your head, tearing up again. You felt like a crybaby. “No, no. It’s- it’s okay. I mean, it's not okay. But she felt I was keeping secrets from everyone, so maybe it was a good thing? I don’t- I don’t know.”
Felix cupped your cheeks, pressing his forehead against yours. “My love, that was not okay. It was not a good thing. You should have been able to come out whenever you felt comfortable. You shouldn’t have been forced to tell anyone about your sexuality.” He wiped your cheeks where tears were falling. “I am so sorry this happened to you.”
You didn’t respond, opting to stay quiet and close your eyes. You felt his lips press against your cheek as you sniffled. “I think… I think we can tell your mom.”
“Are you sure? We really don’t have to. I will wait as long as you want me to.”
You nodded softly. “Yeah. There’s no use hiding it anymore, eh?” You laughed through your crying. He pulled you into his chest, hugging you tightly. “I love you.” 
“I love you.”
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lyinginmeadow · 16 hours ago
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Welcome to my hopefully growing masterlist Currently obssessed with Azriel, so you will mainly find acotar fics here
I don't take requests rn
You can find my fics only on tumblr under @lyinginmeadow. Please don’t repost my work without permission <33
English is not my first language, so please excuse any mistakes.
Angst ❤️‍🩹 Fluff 🌸
Additional warnings about content always included in the individual fics
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Azriel x reader Breakaway ❤️‍🩹 - hockey AU
II. ❤️‍🩹🌸
Shadows will guide you home ❤️‍🩹🌸
Summer days 🌸 - WIP
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Paul Lahote x reader
Look at you now ❤️‍🩹 - WIP
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lyinginmeadow · 2 days ago
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I’m so sorry to keep you waiting for part 2 of Breakaway.
But I come bearing good news! Pt 2 will hopefully be out by the end of this week. ❤️
As a working uni student curently writing bachelor’s thesis, I don’t have much time to write which honestly sucks.
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