#me: let’s use a cool line from the fic for this piece. how about—

[dfortrafalgar]

Special Delivery

(Sanji x Fem!Reader- Offscreen)

Sanji reaches out to Zeff for the first time in years.

I wrote this many, many months ago now, and it was the first fic i posted anonymously on AO3. I got a few requests after it was originally posted to write a second part, which I eventually did!

You can read Part 2 here! Original AO3 link

(I figured I should let my blog breathe a little in between the really heavy and emotional Law fic im writing, and what better way to cool down than some sanji fluff <3)

A sharp squawk awoke Red-Leg Zeff from his daze. With a grumpy expression and a low grunt, he peered towards the direction of the sound.

A messenger coo was seated on the railing of the Baratie's upper deck next to where Zeff stood slouched over with his forearms leaning against the wooden support. It cocked its head to the side as if it was deconstructing Zeff's appearance before reaching into its pouch and procuring a parchment envelope. Zeff found it strange. Messenger coos only usually delivered the newspapers or the latest bounty reports, very rarely were they put in charge of personalized letters. It must have been paid off by whoever wanted this delivered.

The gruff man took the parchment from the beak of the bird and watched as it took back off into the air, leaving a few molted white feathers behind in its wake. He looked at the envelope.

All it said on the front, in very elegant handwriting, was "Captain Zeff." He flipped the paper around, revealing a wax stamp holding the opening down, which he peeled off with a calloused thumb.

Tucked neatly inside the envelope was a white piece of paper, tri-folded over itself. Zeff slipped the paper out, unfolding it to reveal the written contents of the letter. The penmanship was impeccable, and the ink was very sleek. He knew immediately it was from Sanji, not many other pirates had handwriting as good as his. He had completely lost track of how many years it had been since the curly-browed boy left with that ragtag group of pirates to sail to the Grand Line, but Zeff had every single one of his bounty posters. He'd never admit it, but they were tacked up on the wall of his sleeping quarters. Every time Sanji's bounty increased, Zeff felt pride swell in his heart.

"How are you doing, you old geezer. It's been a little too long since we've had any contact, so I thought I'd write to you just to see how you've been. You're no slouch, I'm sure you've been keeping up with the world's events over the past however-many years. Do the Marines even bother to keep sending our bounty posters to the Baratie anymore? Well, regardless, I'm sure you can read right through me. I can't deny it, I miss you, old man. I'm happier than I've ever been in my life, and such a huge part of that is thanks to you and the guys back on that old cruiser. Every recipe I try to make, I imagine you screaming in my ear and telling me that it tastes like shit. Some days I really wish I could be back there, but most of the time I'm joyful. Life has been really, really good. A few years ago, I met someone. Last year, we got married, and soon after our lives changed so drastically. She's the most beautiful woman I've ever laid eyes on, and she's as sweet as an angel. I mean it, too. I know you'd probably think something along the lines of me playing up my affections again just because she's a pretty woman, but I mean it. You'd love her, Zeff. Living as a pirate is the most stressful thing anyone could ever do, but she makes every day worth it. The crew was discussing the possibility of returning to the East Blue a bit ago, and when we do, I'm going to introduce you to her. I've spent the last years talking all about you, how you taught me everything I know about cooking, and I can tell she's just as excited as I am to finally see you. This letter's gone on long enough and I don't want to use up all of Nami's paper.

-- Sanji"

Zeff felt a lump in the back of his throat. Sanji had grown into such a fine young man, eloquent with his words and his feelings. He knew how big of a deal it was for the boy to be so honest and open. But one thing in the letter caught him off guard. What did he mean by, "Soon after our lives changed drastically."?

Zeff peered into the envelope, where another, smaller envelope was tucked inside. He almost didn't see it. Pulling it out, he held the letter and original envelope in between his fingers while he opened the second. Sanji was thorough with his packaging, that's for sure.

Inside, there were three photographs printed on thin, matted paper. The first was of Sanji and you, the wife he wrote about in his letter, taken by someone else holding the camera. Sanji had his arm around you, holding you against him, and you had your face nuzzled into his neck. His other hand held a cigarette away from the two of you, like he was in the middle of telling a story. The two of you were smiling brighter than the sun, Sanji's eyes completely closed with the motion of laughter, and yours creased, your irises looking up towards him.

The second photo made Zeff's eyes water. A photo of you and Sanji on the deck of the Sunny, exchanging rings. Sanji was wearing a sleek navy blue tuxedo, while you were wearing a gorgeous white ballgown. For pirates, you cleaned up phenomenally. He could just make out tears in Sanji's eyes as the photo displayed you sliding a band onto his finger. A skeleton with poofy hair stood between the two of you, which Zeff found a little odd, but he chuckled at the absurdity of it all.

Zeff flipped to the last photo.

The tears that were welling in his eyes from the previous image finally slid down his cheeks in heavy, salty droplets. His lip quivered.

Sanji sat in a chair, beaming down at a bundle of cloth held gently in his arm. He was crying in this photo as well, and was reaching a finger over the top of the bundle, where a smaller hand was reaching outwards to grab onto it. A small glimpse of blonde hair could be made out from under the cloth securing the baby tightly. On the back of the film, Sanji wrote the birth date and the name of the baby.

Zeff used a sleeve to wipe his blubbering eyes. His lips quivered, but he couldn't help the smile that broke out on his face.

Was he allowed to call himself a grandfather now? He figured it was only appropriate.

[taralen]

"W-What's happening to me?!"

It started one morning without any prior signs or warnings. They first appeared as unusual bruises, but as the days passed, they swelled and inflamed. A searing, agonizing pain tortured his wrists. Spamton turned to the strongest painkillers money could buy and covered the painful bands with gauze wraps. He couldn't let his employees see. They were already scrambling to improve numbers for the Q4. How could he motivate them while dealing with this?! Days passed, and they could no longer ignore his bandages. "Sir, are you alright? Did you injure yourself?" they asked. "Worry about your own problems," he said. "We have only a month left. Work on those numbers, and don't worry about me!" [[He]] wasn't answering the phone. What was keeping [[him]]?! He needed answers! Spamton changed the gauze wraps daily as the strange wounds worsened and seeped blood into them. His skin was rotting somehow, necrotizing beneath what felt like tight invisible bands eating away at his flesh but with no rotten odor. Delirium consumed him, coming in waves as the feverish agony of his strange affliction fought against his painkillers. Large round bruises appeared on the outer edge of his hands, transforming into painful, stab-like indentions within days, amplifying this torture. What was this affliction?!

He started wearing black gloves to hide the wraps, using the excuse that he was unusually cold from this strange virus he was fighting off.

WHERE WAS [[HE]]? ANSWER THE DAMN PHONE, YOU PIECE OF @#*(!!!

"It hurts... It hurts..." Spamton uttered, surrounded by his faithful Minitons that served him gentle foods and cooled his forehead as he fought the feverish chills that came and went. The painkillers stopped working, so he downed them with battery acid.

Dazed and confused, he awoke one morning with a terrible throbbing around his jaw. Did he grind his teeth too hard? What was going on?

Spamton stumbled into the bathroom, his hands and wrists now so swollen and inflamed that the capillaries threatened to burst. "I-I can do this. I just need to wash up." He prayed mentally for [[him]] to answer the phone. Please [HEAVEN] let this be the day. Nausea overcame him as he flipped the light switch on. He hurried to the sink and wretched blood and some tar-like substance into it. Heaving, he brought his hand up to massage his aching jaw. When he raised his head, he gazed into his reflection, his stomach dropping as his thumb and forefinger ran down the lines extending from the corners of his lips to the bottom of his chin. They were bruises...

He trembled and then vomited even more blood and black ooze into the sink. With his fingers digging into his scalp, he screamed, "WHAT IS HAPPENING TO ME?!"

Started off as a doodle that I decided to do something with. This is a teaser of how I imagine the [very painful and slow]] transformation Spamton endures while becoming a puppet. I decided to write a small fic with it to give a better idea of the pure agony I imagine him enduring during this time. It's subject to change, but this is the best I got at the moment. LOL.

Though I drew this a while back, I was partially inspired by @keylee's short animation where Big Shot Spamton loses his @#$^ and vomits into a sink. Check it out here:

[bteezxyewriter12]

Where's Your Clothes?

Pairing- San x Named Reader

Word count- 5.4k

Includes- Oral, pussy eating, blow job, deepthroating, cum eating, cock riding, missionary, dirty talk, squirting, multiple orgasms, fluff

Tag List- @mingtina @jaxminnie @yeosayang @delightfulmoonbanana @tannie13 @y00nzin0 @marsstarxhwa

@yeosxxx @seokwoosmole @jjongsbebe @wisejudgedragonhairdo @meowmeowminnie @woo-stars @borntowalkaway @usagionthered @san-realblkwife @seonghwasstar @jejeyeppeo @soulseobi05 @kpop-bambi @prayerofthehaim @realisticnotes @pinkies-things @insomniacatiny @stephy-nicole13

Masterlists- check out for more fics

📝Masterlist 📝ATEEZ Masterlist 📝San Masterlist

J POV

Getting out of my shower, I turn to the towel bar and frown

Fucking hell

I forgot to put new towels before my shower

That is if I even have any more

I've slacked on my laundry

It's just that it's so goddamn hot outside and I'd rather stay inside in my air condition apartment than go out

And that means pj's all day

I'm so thankful I chose being a teacher

Paid summers off and I get to slack off in my AC home, napping, TV show binging, reading, YouTube binging and whatever else I feel like doing

But being in PJs means laundry isn't getting full with clothes, the towels pile up and I forget all about it

I don't want to leave the bathroom because I'm soaking wet and the AC is gonna make me freeze

I have it on in my bedroom and my living room

My best friend San is coming over today to hang today and we switch between hanging in my room and the living room

And he will complain if he has to wait for either to get cool

I check the time on my phone, groaning

He's coming in like ten minutes

I have to brave the cold to get dressed before he comes

Opening the bathroom door, I sprint to the linen closet, the cool air from the living room making me shiver, goosebumps rising on my skin

When I look in the closet I sigh

No towels

Great

How am I supposed to dry my damn hair?

Fuck

Whatever

Scrolling on my phone, I walk to my bedroom, opening the door as I walk in

I close the door, look up and shriek, jumping back

"Where the fuck are your clothes?", San gapes from my bed at the same time I land on my foot wrong, fall backwards, my back and head hitting the door as I land on my ass

All while naked

Fucking perfect

"Shit, Jo are you ok?", San asks, running over to me

"When the fuck did you get here?", I ask, rubbing the back of my head, as his arms move around me, helping me up

"Like fifteen minutes ago", he says, "I used my key when you wouldn't answer the bell and I heard the shower running. I just didn't think you'd walk around with no clothes on"

Right

I'm naked

With his arms around me, holding me

I see in his eyes when he realizes the same thing, his arms moving away, his gaze looking down

"Fuck", he says as he gets an eye full of my boobs, then averts his gaze to the ceiling

I stand frozen not sure of what to do

His gaze flits back to my boobs, slowly moving down more, biting his bottom lip hard

My brain is screaming to move, put fucking clothes on but I can't make my body move

I don't know what spot his eyes are looking at, I just know he's looking at my skin intensely

Almost as if he's in a trance, his hand moves, his cool fingers running softly down my tattoo that runs from my ribs to my hip

My skin shivers where he touches and I'm not gonna lie, I'm a little turned on

His gaze moves to my sternum tattoo, his fingers following, tracing the lines slowly in barely there touches

I notice his breathing changes, becoming more labored with every piece of skin he touches

His other hand moves to my hip, trailing behind me and gently up my back, feeling good

I don't know what the fuck I'm doing

I should tell him to stop, move away from him but I can't

More than can't, I don't fucking want to

I want his hands on me, touching me

It's something I've longed for awhile

So I let him touch me, his hands moving around my boobs, squeezing softly then running up over my shoulders, down my back, over my hips

His hand moves to my lower stomach, then slowly slides up

"So soft", he murmurs, his hand now in-between my boobs

It's taking everything in me to keep standing up right

He leans forward and I wonder what he's going to do when his lips land on my collarbone, pressing a kiss into my skin

I breathe hard, warmth and tingles exploding on the skin under his lips

His lips move to another spot, then another, peppering kisses all over my chest, collarbones and neck

"Should I stop?", he murmurs

"No", I whimper

It's like now that I have his kisses, I need them

His kisses travel down, around my boob until he gets to my nipple

His tongue moves out of his mouth, licking across my nipple, a moan coming from my mouth as I feel it get hard

His tongue licks again and again, soft groans coming from him

He likes this too

It's a shock

Moving to my other nipple, he tugs it into his mouth, sucking softly while his fingers play with my other one

My pussy floods with juice, throbbing as he keeps going, turning me on so much

He plays with my boobs for a bit and I just stand there letting him

His mouth starts it's descent down my body again, this time his tongue licking my skin before he kisses it

Fuck me, who knew San could be this soft?

When he gets to my belly button, he bites on my ring, tugging it softly then giving another kiss

He moves dangerously lower, his hands following the downward path on my back

He kneels as he goes down, his hands now squeezing my ass, his mouth kissing right above my pussy

And fuck I need him

When he's right in front of my pussy, I push my hips forward just as he leans forward, his tongue licking my clit, pleasure running up my spine, a moan escaping

He sucks my clit in his mouth, tugging and playing, my pussy even more soaked

"Fuck", I whimper, my legs shaking as he sucks on me, his hands kneading my booty and pushing me forward more, keeping me right against his mouth, my hands on his shoulder and in his hair, holding on to stay upright

He switches to circling my clit with the tip of his tongue, the pleasure insane

I had no idea San knew how to eat pussy

I don't see him much because he's an idol and we don't really talk about our sex lives

So all this is a surprise to me

"Mmm so good", he murmurs, "Pretty little throbbing clit, love it in my mouth"

That's so fucking hot

His tongue swipes a few more times, then he's back to sucking, my fingers twisting in his hair from the intense bliss

His eyes look up at me, watching me watch him, not tearing his gaze from mine

Goddamn, this is so fucking erotic

Her slurps on my clit repeatedly, making sure his tongue is right against my bump, licking at the same time

It's all so much and I'm right there

He slurps once more and I fall over the edge right into an amazing orgasm

"San", I whimper, his eyes never moving from my face as he sucks as fast as he can, pleasure running through ever nerve, getting me through it

I pull his hair, holding him against my cunt until I finish

When I do, he kisses my clit once, then stands, his face a mess of juice and cum, making me blush

He takes my hand, leading me to my bed

I sit at the edge and he gently pushes me back, opening my legs slowly

He moans, getting back down on his knees, his tongue licking right up my pussy

"Sannie", I cry, my body arching as he keeps sliding his tongue up

"So fucking good", he murmurs, "You taste so good. Sweet cream. Better than I thought you'd be"

Wait what?

What did he- oh god

All thoughts leave my head as his tongue buries in my cunt, swirling everywhere, touching all the right places

"Yes Sannie", I moan

His tongue dips into my hole, wiggling in, making me gasp out in bliss

So good, so fucking good

He gently fucks his tongue into me, making sure he gets as much as he can inside, swiping in my pussy before he pulls out again

God, I never had this much pleasure from a tongue before

My hips move on their own, grinding into his face, his tongue not stopping

"Mm yeah baby", he whimpers between thrusts, "Fuck my face. God, you're fucking perfect"

Yeah right

No way

He's perfect

I'd argue but I'm in too much pleasure to speak

His hands hold my legs open, gripping hard on my thighs as he eats my cunt fucking perfectly

His tongue slips up, playing with my clit, his two fingers sliding in my cunt at the same time and I clench around them hard

"Yeah baby", he praises, moving his fingers in and out, his mouth sucking on my clit again, upping the pleasure

My hips still move on their own, fucking his fingers, taking them deeper

His fingers rub against a spot inside me that has me gasping and crying out, my body shivering

"Found it baby", he says, his fingers pressing and rubbing my spot

I feel another orgasm building and I'm shocked I'm gonna cum again

Normally once is enough or it'll take awhile

His fingers pound in and out and he murmurs against my clit, "Cum against my face baby. All over my fingers. Lemme swallow your sweet cream"

He sucks once more, his fingers pressing my spot and I lose it, bliss blinding me, my body shaking hard as I cum, shouting his name

My body arches as his fingers pull out, his tongue replacing them

I clench down hard on his tongue, the beautiful moan he lets out bouncing in my brain, adding to the pleasure

His tongue moves in and out as he swallows, the pleasure slowly tapering off as I finish

He gives me one long lick, then presses a kiss to my pussy, sitting back on his knees

I struggle to sit up, looking down at him in amazement

He meets my gaze, a small smile on his lips

I don't think, moving to the floor and kneeling in front of him

Moving my hand to his face, I softly stroke his skin, finally able to feel how soft it is under my fingers

His head leans into my touch, lips pressing a kiss to my palm, his eyes still on mine

There are a swirl of emotions in his eyes that I can't place right now but I also see want in them

And I want him

I move my hands to the hem of his shirt, pulling it slowly up his body, giving him time to stop me

But he does the opposite, eagerly helping me like he can't wait to get out of his clothes

The shirt is tossed away and I'm left with the San from the music videos

The hard muscular chest, the fucking abs, the muscley arms

I place my hands on his chest, the power and strength in him like a tangible thing

I slowly trail my hands down his body, feeling every muscle, his skin so soft, so perfect

I touch his abs, running my fingers over them, a look of pleasure on his beautiful face, his teeth biting his bottom lip

Moving my hands around his wrists, I trail up his arms to his shoulders then slip on his back

Leaning forward I kiss his chest again and again, soft whimpers coming from him, my fingers trailing up and down his back at the same time

His skin is baby soft, smooth, perfect

I kiss everywhere on his chest, then move to his shoulders, just wanting to kiss him absolutely everywhere

Placing my hands on either side of his neck, I move them up, cupping his face, his eyes moving to mine

I run my thumb over his lip and I can't stop myself

I lean forward, my lips against his in a world altering kiss

The floor tilts under me, butterflies burst in my stomach, my head dizzy and in the clouds

It's so much more than I expected, blowing me away

We move our mouths at the same time, our tongues against each other's, deepening the kiss

I'm on cloud fucking nine, wanting nothing more than to kiss him forever

I slide my arms around his neck, my fingers sliding in his silky black hair, his arms moving around my waist, pulling me against him

He turns us, laying me on the carpet, his lips never leaving mine as he moves on top of me

I fall into his kiss, never wanting to stop

This is the best kiss of my life

And my best friend is giving it to me

I should be surprised but I'm not

Not with the way I feel for him

His hands move down my body, fingers igniting a fire in every cell he touches

My legs move around him as he presses himself against me, his dick hard under his sweatpants

Oh shit, I made him hard

Or well, doing this with me made him hard

Either way, I've never thought this would ever happen

He moves his hips as his tongue plays with mine, rubbing his hard cock against my pussy

I moan in his mouth, feeling so fucking good

He leans on his arm by my head, his other hand gripping my thigh hard, holding my leg against him as he rolls his hips into me

"Naekkeo", he whines, my heart soaring at the nickname, "Can I take my pants off baby? Please?"

I nod, moving my hands down, starting to push them and his boxers off

He moves on his knees then stands, pulling everything down and kicking them off

I get my first look at his cock and oh my god, it's so big

Holy shit

He moves back down on his knees, his mouth against mine as he goes on top of me again

His hard dick is right against my pussy, rubbing against me, making me more wet

Fuck, I just want him inside me but I'm not sure he wants that

There is something else I can do though

Breaking the kiss, I push him back gently, panic in his eyes

"I'm sor-", he starts

"Let me taste you Sannie", I tell him

His eyes widen in surprise, "You want..."

"To suck your dick Sannie", I assure him, moving my hand down, wrapping around his hard cock, stroking him slowly, "Will you let me?"

He nods slowly, almost like he doesn't believe I'm going to do it

"Lay back baby", I tell him, softly pushing him down on the carpet

I kiss his soft lips then move to his neck, pressing kiss after kiss, trailing them down his hot as fuck body

I get to his huge dick, kissing all around his base then licking slowly up

Fuck, his skin is so soft but he's so hard at the same time

Getting to his head, I waste no time in wrapping my mouth around it, sucking softly

"Oh god"

I look up at him, finding his gaze already on me, watching me suck his dick, the pleasure on his face so satisfying

I'm making him feel good

Hopefully he'll remember this

Moving my tongue by his slit, I lick up the cum he's leaking in my mouth, moaning at how good he tastes

Like really, cum shouldn't taste this good

I take as much of him in my mouth as I can at the moment, sucking harder, faster, wrapping my hand around the rest of his cock

I squeeze gently, then move my hand up and down as I move my mouth on him, his gorgeous sounds so fucking erotic

I breathe in through my nose, preparing myself

Letting go of his cock, I slide all the way down, gagging but getting him all in my throat

"Oh my fucking god", he pants, his chest rising and falling so rapidly

My throat spasms around him and I swallow on his length to try and get under control

I've deepthroated before, it just takes me a minute to get used to a cock in my throat

Once I feel like I'm steady, I start to bob up and down his shaft, taking him all the way in again and again

His dick is so thick, stretching my mouth wide but he really does feel so good in my throat

"Baby, fuck. You're mouth", he pants, "So good. Fuck"

I smirk because yeah, I'm good at blow jobs

And I already like sucking his dick way too much

Bobbing up and down, I bottom him out each time, tears in my eyes, spit everywhere, the taste of his leaking cum taking over

Swallowing on his entire shaft has him yelling out in pleasure and I continue to do it when I have him all in my throat again and again

His cock throbs hard in my mouth and I think he's gonna cum

"Baby please", he begs, pulling me off his dick suddenly

Why?

Did I do something wrong?

Was it not good?

Why did he stop?

His fingers brush against my cheek, my gaze meeting his

"I...I think I need to be in your pussy. Can I?", he asks quietly

He what?

"Please?", he repeats and it hits me that he wants to have sex

With me

Oh my god, yes

"You can baby", I answer, nodding

He pulls me into his lap and I go willingly, straddling him

"Can you ride me?", he asks, his brown eyes gazing pleadingly at me, "Like you rode Yeosang and Wooyoung?"

I stare at him in shock

How the fuck does he know I slept with them?

I didn't tell anyone

It was once each

And it just happened

Yeosang happened during a practice break and Wooyoung happened when I was waiting for San to get back from the gym

It was nothing, just some fun

"They told me Jo", he says, softly, "They...they told me all about it. What you did with them. I...I want you to be like that with me. Want me like you wanted them"

I do want him like that

He's the only one I ever wanted

My whole life, it's only been him

"Can you?"

I nod, "Yeah Sannie"

I kiss him with him eagerly kissing me back as I gently push him back down on the carpet, going with him

Breaking the kiss, I run my fingers from his chest down to his abs, feeling his skin tremble and move under my touch

I like that a lot

Moving in his lap, I watch him watch me move his big dick under me, his breathing getting harder

Sitting down on him, I slide his head inside me, my pussy immediately clenching around him

"Fff .. fuck", he murmurs

Leaning back on his legs, I sink down on more of him, his cock so thick, stretching me wide open

Fuck me, he's massive

I wiggle my hips as I slide him in inch by inch, the feel of his cock gliding inside so fucking pleasurable

"Sannie, oh fuck baby", I moan, drenching his cock with every slip down

"Yes naekkeo yes. Feels so good, fuck", he murmurs, his eyes on my pussy taking his dick, "Pretty pussy opening for me. Fuck so good"

"How much more?", I moan

It feels like he's all the way in my stomach but if there's more, I can take all of him

I want to take all of him

"A little more baby", he pants

I nod, moving his hands to my hips

"Help me Sannie"

He nods, pushing me down his length, going in so much deeper

"All of you baby", I whimper, "Want all of you"

"Yeah naekkeo", he murmurs, stopping his movements, "There baby. All of me"

I clench down around him involuntarily, feeling him inside me, feeling him fill me to the brim

Feels so satisfying

"Fuck, you're pussy looks so good on my cock", he praises as I move my hips, rocking on him, his fat head rubbing my spot, "Fuck, wanted this pussy for a long time"

Wait what?

I look down at him in surprise but he's looking at my pussy around him

"Wanted to see how those pretty lips looked around my cock. Beautiful baby"

I raise my eyebrow in shock

He thought about us before?

He wanted me like this before?

When?

How?

"Fuck Jo, you look so pretty on my dick", he murmurs, his hands slowly sliding up my body, "So perfect, like you belong here, on top of me"

My head is spinning, dumbfounded at what he's saying

And wondering if he even realizes what he's saying

Or if it's just in the moment

"Ride me naekkeo"

"Yeah Sannie", I answer, pushing everything he said away

I can't obsess about it now

I'm finally with him and I'm going to make the most of it

Leaning on his stomach, I start moving, small bounces first to get used to him

"Oh fuck", he moans, "Fuck, so good"

He's right, it is so good

"You can cream my cock for me?", he asks as I slide slowly up and down his cock, "Please? Cream my cock baby, I know you can do it"

"Mmm", I moan, his cock hitting all the right places, head against my spot, feeling so fucking good

Best cock I've been on

"I know you can naekkeo. I heard Yeosang and Wooyoung talk about your pussy. How good you creamed them. You can do that for me?"

"Yes", I moan, moving faster on him

Every bounce I move further up his dick, bottoming him out until I slip all the way up to his head

"Down baby, please", he groans as my cunt squeezes his head

Dropping down, I take him all in one shot, his head slamming into my spot, stars blasting in my vision as bliss hits me hard

Oh my fucking god

"There we go", he murmurs, "So pretty"

I keep sliding up and down his length, my legs burning but fuck if I'm gonna stop

"Good girl. So much cream, your pussy is pouring it out. So pretty all over me"

"Uh-huh", I murmur, riding him harder

"The guys said it took you awhile for you to cream them like this. They had to work for it", he says, his eyes solely on my pussy swallowing his cock, "You're already creaming my cock so much baby. Do you like my cock better than theirs?"

"Yes", I pant

His cock is so big I can feel every inch drag out of me, then every inch spreading me open again, his head hitting my spot each time, sending shivers of pleasure through every cell of my body

His cock is better, hands down

"Does my cock feel better?", he asks, his hips lifting slowly as I come down, shoving himself in deeper than before

I can't, it's fucking amazing

I nod, taking his perfect cock inside me over and over, my mind starting to turn off

All I can feel is San

His dick inside me, his hands gripping my hips so hard, his sweaty but soft skin under my hands

He's taking over me and I'm letting him

"Don't you wish you creamed and rode my dick first?"

"Yes! Yes baby!", I shout, so fucking close, my entire body shaking

A few more bounces is all it takes, my body exploding in ecstasy as an all consuming orgasm wracks my body

"San!", I scream, "San! San!"

My brain shuts off, intense pleasure flowing everywhere and I know I'm squirting all over him

"Fuck, yes! Yes baby! Fuck don't stop", he cries, "Please naekkeo. It feels so fucking good, don't stop"

I can't even if I wanted to

Which I don't

The pleasure leaves my body slowly, shivers running through me as I come back to my senses

When I do, San is smiling so widely at me and I feel my face heat up

"That was so hot baby", he says, gleefully

I lower my gaze to his body, finding him completely drenched

His lap, his stomach, even some of his chest is soaking wet with squirt

"Sss....sorry you're all wet"

He raises his eyebrow as he sits up

"What? Don't be sorry baby. I loved it"

"You did?"

He nods, "Yeah. It was so hot. And you....you looked so beautiful coming on me. It's something I wanted to see for a long time"

Before I can even say anything, he pulls me to him, his lips against mine

I kiss him back immediately, his arms wrapping around me as mine move around his neck

He moves so he's sitting against my bed, his hands running up and down my back, his fingers heating every nerve inside my body

My hips move on their own, grinding and rocking on his hard cock still buried inside me

"Mmm naekkeo. Keep going baby", he murmurs, moving his kisses to my neck, "Love my cock this much huh?"

"Yes", I admit, trembling from his head rubbing my spot over and over

"Should of been on my dick first. Bad girl"

"Yeah", I agree

I should of

His hand touches my chin, making me look at him

"I forgive you for letting other cocks in here before me", he says, smirking, "But from now on this creamy pussy is mine"

My eyes widen at his words, wondering what they could possibly mean

Is he...saying he wants to keep sleeping with me?

"This pussy takes my cock only. Creams my cock only. Squirts on my cock only. Cums around my cock and no one else's. Understand?"

"Yes", I nod, shocked he's saying this and even more dumbfounded that he sounds like he means it

His hand moves down between us, his thumb pressing onto my clit and rubbing softly

Pleasure blasts in my brain and body, my hips automatically grinding faster on him

"My mouth is the only one who can eat your pussy. Suck on your clit. Swallow your cum. Drink your squirt"

I can't answer, the intense look on his face as he says these words adding to everything I'm feeling

"My fingers are the only ones allowed in your pussy. The only ones who can play with your little throbbing clit"

I nod, moaning softly

"If anyone asks, you tell them this is San's pussy. Understand?"

"Yes", I cry, my legs shaking hard around him, "Your pussy"

"Who's?"

"Yours!"

"What's my name?"

"San!", I cry, my orgasm washing over me, clenching repeatedly around his rock hard cock, bliss taking over, "San! San's pussy. Only San's"

"Good girl", he grunts, his fingers rubbing me through my orgasm

When it's over, I slump against him, his chuckle washing over me

"Aww naekkeo. I'm not done with you yet baby"

Holding me to him, he stands up, laying me on my bed

He moves on top of me, my legs wrapping around him on their own

His cock slides back inside, the pleasure making me arch off the bed, moaning until he bottoms out

My pussy takes him easily, gripping him hard, keeping him inside, pulsing around him

"Fuck", he murmurs, pleasure all over his face, "My perfect baby"

His arms slips around my waist, holding me against him as he starts moving

"I'm yours naekkeo", he tells me, "I promise my cock is only for your cunt. Fucks only your cunt. Cums inside your pussy only"

"Yeah baby", I nod, wanting that more than anything

Wanting him to just be mine

He keeps a slow steady pace, spreading me open so pleasurably on his cock, driving himself deep inside, his pelvis rubbing against my clit

His lips press kisses all over my skin, his free hand softly groping my boobs, playing with my nipples, sending even more ecstasy into my body

"Please baby, can your mouth be just for my cock too? Can you only suck my cock from now on, swallow my cum from now on?", he asks

"Yes Sannie. Yes", I promise him, keeping one hand on his back, the other on his side, feeling his muscles move as he fucks me

God, that's so fucking erotic and I love it

"And you're pretty hands are for my cock too? Only to be wrapped around me?", he pleads, "Only touch me?"

"Yes Sannie, only you"

He groans into my neck, thrusting just a touch faster

My hips have a mind of their own, moving with him, meeting his thrusts, making the bliss even more intense

"Can...can your lips only kiss me? Please naekkeo, I want your kisses to be only for me. Please?"

"Is...is that what you want?", I ask through the pleasure, wondering if he realizes what he's saying

"Yes. Fuck yes"

"Then yes Sannie. My kisses are only for you"

He lifts his head from my neck, looking down at me with an expression I can't place, "Are you mine? My girl? My Jo? My naekkeo? My girlfriend? Only mine?"

Is he...asking me to be his?

Like romantically?

Is he being serious?

"Yes", I answer

Of course it's yes

It wouldn't never be anything but yes

And even if it's just an in the moment thing, it's always yes

"Are you my one and only Sannie?", I ask nervously, hoping this is real, "My boyfriend. My baby? You're the idol who can have anyone you want"

He shakes his head, "You're the only one I want Jo. The only one for me. You"

His hand moves to my face, fingers softly stroking my cheek

"I love you", he says, gazing in my eyes

His words slam into my head, shock taking over

"Fuck Jo, I love you so much", he confessed, "I've been waiting for you for so long naekkeo"

Oh my god

He loves me

Happiness pounds into my body and I can't help the smile that bursts on my face

"I love you Sannie", I tell him, "I love you more than anything. You're mine"

He smiles as he nods, his adorable dimples on display, "I am. I am baby. All yours"

I pull him to me, our lips crashing against each other's in a passionate wild kiss

We cling onto each other, kissing desperately as we resume moving together, bliss roaring back in my body

"I love you", I tell him between kisses, moving my hips to meet him, taking his cock deep inside, feeling the pleasure of his head against my spot

"I love you", he murmurs, "I love you"

He moves faster, plunging inside, my pussy clenching him, soaking him, feeling him throb hard

"San", I moan, right there

He slams into my pussy hard, both of us screaming each other's names against our lips as we both cum

Stars blast in my eyes, my body wracked in ecstasy against his

His hands grip me tightly, holding me to him as his warm cum shoots inside my pussy

My cunt latches onto him, milking him for all of his cum

I want it all, the feeling of him filling me so fucking satisfying

"Yes Sannie", I cry, "All your cum baby. Give me all of it"

It takes awhile but when the pleasure finally tapers off, we're both breathing hard, melting against each other

"Mine", he whispers, "My naekkeo"

"Yours Sannie", I agree, "Always yours"

His eyes meet mine and I hold back a gasp at the love I see in them

He really does love me

It wasn't an in the moment thing

He really feels this way

His hand moves in my hair, running through the strands, his eyes on mine, a soft smile on his face

"I love you"

"I love you San"

He pulls me to him, kissing me softly

When the kiss ends, he smiles, "Can we cuddle? Nap maybe?"

That sounds absolutely perfect

"Yeah baby. Always"

Laying down in his arms, we settle in together, holding each other tightly

His fingers play in my hair while I softly rub mine up and down his side

His kisses the top of my hair, making me smile

As we snuggle together, I can't help but think that I'm so glad I never did my laundry

[bloodykora]

Drunk Walk Home

My first actual Viktor fic, yayy!! Summary: After a celebration at the lab, you and Viktor have been left together. He tries to plan a way for you to get home however will you make it there? Mentions of alcohol and drinking I try to keep my fanfic gender neutral, there's no fem or masc description and there's no use of y/n.

“You’re so pretty, do you know that?” The lab is quiet, streamers and confetti over the floor. Balloons beginning to droop down from the ceiling, the lights once bright and vibrant now dimmed down. “Remind me to tell Jayce when you are sober, never let you celebrate with him by bringing vodka.” A giggle escapes your mouth as you remain laid down on the cool floor, the brunette sitting as usual. “God, he is such a lightweight! I wouldn’t have brought such a big bottle if I knew he’d tap out at like what, 3 shots?” You reminisce about the night that had just happened, knowing it will be some of your favourite memories of the group for months to come.

“For someone who cannot get off the floor you do speak a lot of uh, what’s the slang you use? Shit.” You ignore his mocking mostly, deciding not shoot a line back at him. “You were supposed to drink with us but no. Mister, I am too good for that and someone has to be responsible in the group. Even Sky had a drink with us, but only a teeny sip of the champagne for you. Also, you deflected my compliment.” “Well, look who was the one that called transportation for the other two while you decided to take a seat on the floor.” You lift your head to look at Viktor who stays seated at his lab placement. The world around you swaying, almost to a hypnotizing degree. You narrow your eyes at him, setting yourself on a mission.

“Did you know that I can’t black out?” You state, while slowly getting up onto your hands and knees. Stumbling some of your way to the chair Viktor was sitting in. “Why is that?” He watches you, ready to have to bandage your face from falling but you surprisingly don’t even trip over your own feet. “I do not know! I have mixed alcohol types, had way too many shots, blah blah blah and nothing. I mean don’t get me wrong, it’s a talent and I appreciate it but I just want a fun story from someone about me blacking out.” You moan as you place your hand on his shoe as you reach him. “Blacking out is not what you make it seem.” Viktor mumbles to himself. “Viktor!” He looks down at you, as if he doesn’t know that you heard him. “Have you ever been, has the uhh minister, whatever yordle’s dude, has been blacked out before? How will the academy react?” The words ramble out of your mouth, every new thought grabbed onto and then let go as another goes by. “Heimerdinger but ‘uhh minister, whatever yordle’ also works.” “More like… Heimerslinger.” You mumble to yourself other rhymes of his name, seeing if any fit. “Hmm, good one.”

“Wait, you avoided the question.” You grab a piece of his leg brace, near the bottom of his pant leg. “Yes but that is a story for another time. When you’re sober.” “I am so sober, the soberest I have ever been.” You smile wide at him as he raises an eyebrow. “Yes, that is why you are holding my leg brace like how a toddler holds a chip.”

“Am I hurting you? Pulling on it?” Your eyes wide like a child’s, concerned about his safety and well being while hammered. Like you couldn’t even think to hurt him, even if it’s accidental. He feels your grip loosen, ready to let go at his command. “No.” You bite your lip subconsciously, smiling at him while doing so. A habit you had normally while concentrating but the alcohol made you not able to feel your teeth and lips. Tongue and gums also numb from the booze seeping through every vein of yours. “Now how are we going to get you home?” He asks himself, eyes looking away as he thought of the quickest and cheapest way. You make a pouty face at him, disappointed he wanted you gone that fast. Holding it too until you got to see his reaction to it. “You sick and tired of me Viktor?” His eyes look back to you, greeted by the look you had. He smirks lightly, eyes rolling at your feigned sadness. “Is someone a pouty baby now? Clearly you need to go to bed.” “Nooo, don’t call me a baby. Unless I’m your baby.” The line comes out before you even think about the implications. You chuckle a bit to yourself, finding it funny how naturally the flirts and teasing come out now.

“You are a handful. Do you know that?” You nod at Viktor, staring at his face to an unsettling degree. Taking in his features as he studied you back, wondering what you were going to do next. You think of going home, to the lonely and cold apartment the academy covered for you. Then you think of Viktor going home, if he would, “Are you going to stay here and work?” You abruptly ask him, not wanting the already overworked man to again over work himself.

“I had thought about staying here earlier today and getting some research done while you all were home but then something came up.” He pauses, thinking over whether it would be treacherous in the cold weather to make it home. It wasn’t like it was far or even intimidating at this time of night but it didn’t mean he’d enjoy the cool with his aching leg and back. “I could totally walk you home. Be like your really scary guard dog.” You suggest, sensing his hesitancy about going home. He was always so dedicated to learning and notes that you were semi surprised at his response. “Your comments as always are amusing. However, my first concern is getting you home.” You lift your hand to make a thumbs down at him, disapproving of his choice.

“What if I die on the train home?” You joke however honestly putting that fear into Viktor’s head. His brain now thinking of all the accidents that could happen, he lets out a sigh. You pick up on the signs and immediately feel regret for the comment you made. “Hey that was a joke, you ain’t gotta worry so much dude. Worst case scenario is me falling on my face but that’s like a 2 percent chance.” You try to comfort him, gently lifting your hand to pat his knee. Still sitting at his leg. “You could always just bring me home, walking home is safer in pairs anyway. I wouldn’t want anyone to snatch you up for your juicy brains.” You see him crack a small smile and feel a little relief in your chest. You sit thinking for a minute, wondering if Sky and Jayce had made it to their homes alright. Playing the thought of them walking out of the lab doors together, Viktor insisting they both take a cab together to save money. Your face begins to fall and your brows furrow together. Viktor realizes it’s been too quiet for too long and looks down at you.

“You okay? What’s wrong?” Your gaze moves to meet his. “Sky took my coat.” At a fun turn of events, Sky had forgotten to bring a proper coat to work, and you very knightley offered yours. To defend her from the cold and with all the sweaters you left in the lab you thought you’d be fine. “Yes, why is that bad?” He prompts you, encouraging you to spill it out. “My keys were in my chest pocket.” You state simply, looking up to him with slight glee on your face. You giggle quietly, bewildered you had gotten yourself into this predicament. “Are you joking?” He asks, stern in his voice. Clearly, not in the mood for joking about this topic. You shake your head no, dropping the smile so he knew you were not playing around. He takes a breath in and you feel like a burden.

“I can stay here, find a way to meet with her tomorrow.” You suggest softly, not wanting to bother the man any further. “No, it’s okay. I promised the professor after the good news that we would be out tomorrow morning which is why Jayce had planned this for us today.” He explains to you, you nod as you listen along. The info being sobering to you, you let go of his brace placing your hands behind you on the floor. “I can probably just find a friend’s house then, or something. I can figure something.” You mumble off again, wondering what you’d be able to conjure up this late in the night. Maybe sneaking your way through a window into your building, hoping the spare key was around somewhere. “No. You can come home with me, if you’re comfortable.” “I can’t Viktor, that's too personal and I don’t want to intrude on your personal home space.” “It’s too late for you to be able to call anyone or you won’t be able to get into your door. In these circumstances, you may come back to my home with me. I’m sure it may be awkward but it will be fine.” “I will be the best guest ever, I swear. I won’t be loud and I don’t think I snore and I won’t touch anything.” You say, springing up from the ground. Ready to follow him wherever he had planned to go.

“You’re so excited to leave, minutes ago you were whining.” You scurry to your desk, grabbing the nearest hoodie you could find. A blue thick wooly one, with a hood, perfect for the adventure ahead. You turn back towards him, lifting your hand and mimicking him talking with it. He chuckles at the action, rolling his eyes slightly. Leaning forward on his crutch he stands up, grabbing his things and readying to leave with you. “Do you have lab keys? Cause ha, we both know I do not.” You ask, walking up to him with your hand open to receive them. “I do not know if I trust you with keys at this moment.” You scoff and roll your eyes at his comment. “You’re right here, it’s not like I’m gonna chuck em.” You state, still waiting for him. You hear the familiar jingling that echoed yours, the cool metal being set into your hand gently. You smile and close your hand around them, bringing them close to your face to find the one that locks up the lab. 

You both walk out of the room, your pace being a little more slow than usual to not rush Viktor. You close the doors and lock it, wiggling the door handle before turning to Viktor. He had his hand out, similar to yours just moments ago. You shake your head while smiling, putting the keys into his hand which he slips into his coat pocket. The beginning of the walk is silent, getting out of the academy building as quietly as you could to not disturb students in dorm rooms. A blast of cold air hitting both your faces as you step out of the door frame, the wind was always colder coming off all the water around Piltover. Your breaths coming out in puffs of white clouds, like you were one of the pipes that came out of a building for the laundry dryer.

“It’s not too bad, but then again I probably feel it less than you right now.” You state, looking at the man walking beside you. “I am just lucky I brought a jacket today, honestly if the walk was longer I would have wanted a cover for my face.” He replies, seeing the change of your skin already with the weather. Your cheeks and nose begin to get just ever so slightly paler than the rest of your face. Your gaze meets his, the tips of his ears turning red at the coolness as well. “Do you ever cry in the winter?” You ask him, thinking of walking in the blistering cold. “Where the wind just howls straight at your face and you can’t see. Your eyes water up and begin to freeze on your eyelashes?” You clarify, imagining just a woman standing in the snow sobbing, at the way you phrased your words. Your eyes fall down to the sidewalk in front of you, watching your feet move along beside Viktor’s. “I’m not one to go out when it’s snowing, I normally stay at the lab when those nights happen. But on the off chance, yes it has happened to me.” He answers diligently, always working with him. Always on his mind, even when it’s not supposed to be. The thoughts of him circle your head, quieting the convo again.

You hadn’t been too explorative of Piltover when working at the academy, all the homes and lights illuminating the streets. The new places held a wonder and excitement, even alleyways and garbage cans had ignited child-like comments. “It’s so pretty here, I still sometimes am amazed that I can see the night stars. And everything is so tidy, and I know a part of me is supposed to be mad. I should be so upset that the Undercity is treated with ignorance, and annoyance but. I mean, look at the moon and the water. All the boats. I never imagined the place I had hated so much could be lovely.” The words flow off your tongue, you knew Viktor had been from the same place as you. Both lucky with the smarts to get out of the actually toxic home. Yet you still missed it, jumping in piles of leaves when the Upper city dumped them down, how when the snow melted it would wash away some of the muck that had been there for the year. Viktor admires you and your openness, not able to talk to anybody else about his home. He smiles, watching your gaze being locked up into the sky.

“I think I drew them the first night I was here.” He confesses to you, thinking back to the same excitement he had felt when he first arrived. The buzz of the city and the positive attitude of the people. Don’t get him wrong, people did give mean looks but they at least didn’t then trip you and steal whatever you may have had on you. Viktor recognizes his home, 2 blocks up the road from where you both were. “I have to admit, it may not be necessarily tidy when we arrive. I wasn’t expecting anybody.” He sheepishly says, now thinking of all the clothes and glasses around the place. “It’s okay, mine is pretty messy too right now. I’m not one to judge.” You reassure him quickly, knowing how busy the life of a scientist, an inventor can really be. 

You follow him up the front steps to the building, watching him use his keys to open the lock and get inside. You found yourself in a hallway, realizing it was an apartment building with neighbors. You remain silent as you follow him up another set of stairs and another locked door. You follow him into the apartment, closing the door behind you and locking it for him. Slipping your shoes off, the warmth overheats causing you to begin to strip off the sweater. Viktor peels off his coat, walking into the home and placing it on a chair nearby. Turning on a lamp nearby for you both to see. You walk in after, looking at the space. It was a lot bigger than what you had at home. And open as well, huge space for a small little thing, too big for it actually.

“How is it, this is big.” You comment, slowly walking around a table that was placed and towards the black board near the opposite side of the room. “Oh uh, well. The owners found out I worked at the academy, and the landlord would always see my mess of papers. I desperately needed the space so I actually own both the apartments up here. I took out a few walls to open it, voila.” He talks while undoing his vest and red tie, getting comfortable after the long day. You continue to ponder around, looking at the writings on the board. A dark brown wood as the floor, almost no carpet except one little one under a coffee he had in front of a sofa chair. Books littered throughout the living room, even into the kitchen and dining area. His curtains pulled to avoid any peeks in, mugs scattered too. You approach the kitchen, dishes neatly organized in the dish dryer thing he owned. A window right in front of the sink, for what you can assume is the morning sun. Two little dishes sit on the sill, one full of water and the other empty.

“Do you have a kitty?” You turn to him, socks now pulled off and joined with the rest of the scatter. He lifts his head up to look at you. “No, just a stray that pops in from time. But she never lets me pet her.” He says, smiling at the thought of the skinny black tabby that visits his window sill. “I have a cat, her name is Barbecue.” You state before peaking your way around down his hall. You could see the door to his bedroom cracked open, you decide to sneak away while his attention was on something else. Creeping your way down to the door quickly, you could hear his voice. “Barbecue, why?” He pauses in his words before continuing. “Hello? Where did you go?” 

You barely hear it however, in his room and looking around. Clothes thrown around and his bedding all messy, slept in. The bed is soft, a comforter big enough to topple over the edges of the already king sized bed, the pillows being more than anyone could ever need. You reach down, following the steps of Viktor and taking off your socks. You knew this was surpassing a boundary but considering you had sat at his foot about an hour ago holding onto his knee, hopefully this wouldn’t startle him too bad. You creep into his bed, getting comfy under the sheets.

“Dude you have so many pillows!” You yell out, hearing the approaching footsteps. You watch the door frame, seeing his head look in and then at you. “They are for my body, I have heating and cooling ones as well. And you are not supposed to be in here.” He speaks, his shirt now untucked and the top unbuttoned. You smile sheepishly at him, wiggling in the bed a bit. “But it’s so cozy and so big.” A grin is plastered onto your face, and he looks too tired now to complain or argue. “You really are a handful, 2 handfuls.” He walks to the other side of the bed, throwing the top blanket back and crawling in. You could tell it for a moment was painful for him, his eyes closed and brows furrowed but his face soon relaxed. It remains silent between you two for some time.

“I can feel you staring at me.” His accent becomes heavier as tiredness takes over, he peeps open one eye to look at you. “Do you want me to turn off the light? Is there any pillow you want specifically?” You go into caretaker mode, making sure his comfort was met before you actually settled in. He smiles at your need to impress him.

“I’m fine but yes you can turn off the light, and for the morning. I have some pain meds in the bedside table next to you, feel free to take one when you get up.” He says and you nod, getting up to shut off the light before snuggling back in on your side. The room again dies down, sounds of crickets outside filling the room. You lay there smiling, too giddy to sleep yet you yawn. You blink your eyes, focusing on the sight before you. Easing into a state of rest and slumber, already planning for the adventure that had awaited you tomorrow. You hear Viktor’s breathing slow and you decide to close your eyes. Falling asleep with the man of your dreams. 

[nyxi-pixie]

Hiiiii.

Sorry to bother you, I wanted to know if you had any fic recs? Your writing is so good and your tastes are immaculate, and I am starving for any kind of good content. Please?

its not possible to bother me love dw <3

NOW. i dont actually read all that much anymore bc i am horrendously picky but this does give me an excuse to hype up the few authors that have satisfied my unreasonably specific tastes 🤩.

so. a few bsd recs for you (except theyre 99% skk because im horribly predictable forever). everyone go read all of these and tell the authors how wonderful they are in the comments please <3

anything @booksandpaperss has ever written is genius work and everyone should read it. could talk abt all of their stuff for hours (and i have🤩 they put up w so much of me bothering them godbless). also our brains do some accidental crazy mind melding shit whenever either of us write fic so if you like any of my stuff you will like theirs. thats the rules. <3

like twin stars in the dark (we collide)- dead apple skk porn as a vehicle for 22skk analysis. makes me salivate i have read it so many times. they get 22skk better than anyone🙏

my lies are for you to keep (my love for you to lose) - the only take on beastskk that matters to me ever. you can actually see me losing my mind in the comment i wrote on this fic bc of how fucking insane every single line made me. theres SO much packed into this thing its fucking crazy i NEEEEED everyone to read it. thats all <3

till death, I'll give you my breath - dazai death timeloop. this fic terrifies me so much i await every update with my teeth chattering and my heart pulsing so rapidly i should be hospitalised. the first scene of chapter 2 genuinely had me on the verge of tears im unwell about it.

(elli also has some jjk stuff thats REALLYREALLY good and if ur into jjk u should check that out too.)

NOW. aside from being a propaganda machine for my fav writer ever. Heres some other stuff i love.

the second perspective by @wildflowerteas. murder mystery/detective noir stuff w some time fuckery. the au of all time. mashes aspects of beast, canon, and some extra special niko sauce into a mixing bowl and goes crazy w it. just Such a genuinely impressive piece of writing. i could talk abt the technical brilliance of it for hours but i will stop myself. you gotta commit to this thing because it WILL make u crazy. also i loveee the sskk. its like if we had the beast first meeting sskk forever. SOSO GOOD!!!!

did fate guide the gun or did you? by @kanetheo. i read this pretty soon after chapter 109 and it genuinely fried my brain for months. the writing style is beautiful (as for everything they write AUGHH!!!) and the angst is delectable. the way it intersperses more fun silly skk moments with just. complete misery. GOD. it just hits. ive reread it quite a few times and it never fails to make me go crazy. srsly cannot rec this enough.

the decomposition of dazai osamu by @hella1975 this shot several bullets through my brain and i still havent recovered. i keep thinking 'oh i should reread that' and then i dont bc some part of my brain still concerns itself w maintaining whats left of my sanity. BUT its crazy good and everyone should read it and suffer at least once. EVERYONE LOVES YOU OSAMU!!!! EVERYONE EATS YOU!!! line of all time lets all kill ourselves.

smoke held conversations by feralrookie - i havent reread this in a while but it does cool stuff with nlh and the skkisms are really good in this too. ppl often write teen chuuya as less intelligent than he actually is. hes very observant, esp of dazai, and this fic gave me that 🙏

i called your name til the fever broke by forest_raccoon - vampire chuuya. biting is involved. i blacked out reading it. enough said.

[the-ninja-legacy-whip]

Lmao imagine something like this in book 3:

Harumi: but now that I'm alone, there's barely anything to do so I try to pass my time with writing

Lloyd: oh that's cool! What do you write?

Harumi: just some green ninja x reader one shots! They're surprisingly popular on the internet!

Lloyd: HUH?!

Lloyd beta reads the heck out of them and constantly makes "suggestions" to a) make sure they're accurate b), make himself cooler c), limit the amount of bashing of the other ninja, and d) he does like them khgfdfgd, and as Harumi values his opinion so highly she takes him up on everything. Otherwise he doesn't actually care that she's writing them since she's actually putting him in a good light, and the ~romances~ are hardly anything more than hand-holding or a kiss on the cheek. But holy smokes he cannot let the other ninja find out–

(ALSO IMAGINE SAMANTHA IS ONE OF HER READERS LMAO)

. . .

Lloyd: I like this plot point with the Green Ninja saving the reader from being crushed by a tank and all, but does the Fuchsia Ninja really need to die at the end...?

Harumi: It adds some ~spice~ to the otherwise basic plot. It helps sets me apart from those other X-Reader writers :3

Lloyd: But sometimes...a basic plot...is good!

Harumi: ...I'm keeping it e-e

. . .

Harumi: Any suggestions for this piece? I feel like some of the detail is a little lacking...

Lloyd: You should totally have the Green Ninja using more weapons in the fight scene, he really likes cannons and rocket launchers. And maybe have him say more nice, general things about the reader, I get the impression he's the type not afraid to tell people what he really thinks of them, but he could still be a little shy. ...And I think you should an explosion behind them as they sail away on the dragon mech instead of a sunset, sunsets are so over done

Harumi: Oooh, you're a visionary *edits*

. . .

Samantha: Oh heck yeah, SilentSister14 just put out a new GN x Reader fic!!! Everyone shut up I'm so reading it right now—!

Antonia: I cannot believe you just announced that.

Samantha: Hey, you would too if you read them! The author's super talented and detailed! It's like she knows the Green Ninja personally or something!!

Antonia: ...no way, send me the link!!

Harumi: *sweating, staring straight ahead trying to pretend she's an unrelated party*

. . .

Lloyd: ...also, why do you keep describing the Green Ninja with gold eyes?!

Harumi: Because that's what color they are, duh

Lloyd: *goes through five stages of grief and seven stages of panic*

. . .

Harumi: ...why are you looking at me like that?

Lloyd: I-I, uh, think you put in a typo in this one...

Harumi: Oh jeez, what?! Where?!

Lloyd: ...the line where the Green Ninja says "And I love you too, Harumi"

Harumi:

Lloyd: ...how many of these are actually about you—?

Harumi: IDONTHAVEACRUSHONTHEGREENNINJA—I mean, I was just really in the mindset while writing!!!! it's a good thing to do, Lloyd!!!!! You're not a writer; you wouldn't understand!!! What better way to understand your character than putting yourself in their shoes, obviously!!! IT MEANS NOTHING

Lloyd:

Lloyd: ......I mean, I wouldn't blame you if you did—he is a pretty heroic guy, and is probably super cool, and smooth, and strong, and awesome, and probably has an excellent taste in a dagger and knife collection—

Harumi: Oh my god, SHUTUP...!

Lloyd: *is going to have an ego the size of texas about this lmao*

[froglovemushroom]

This Ariel is a Headutt-er!

Pairing: Natasha Romanoff x alien!fem!reader (Mantis and Peter Quill's younger sibling)(reader is the same species as Mantis)

Warnings : A wee bit of violence

Summary: Instead of Prince Eric, it was Ariel herself who swept you off your feet.

Aurhor's note: everyone is alive in all my fics, except if a specific setting or timeline is mentioned

This is a fic requested by @fayhar ! I'm so sorry it took me so long to finish this, I got too caught up with classes. But it's summer break now and I can finally write again! Hope you like this fic! English isn't my first language so please point out the mistakes nicely, I'll fix it 🥲

It all started when Yondu handed Peter a DVD that he had obtained from Earth.

The cover of the DVD box read 'The Little Mermaid' with a picture of what looked like a girl who is half Terran and half fish with bright red hair.

It was the first time the gang ever watched an animated movie during movie night and everyone had different reactions. Drax made silly comments, Rocket complained about certain scenes, Peter would place a kiss on the crown of Gamora's head during the more romantic scenes, and she would cuddle closer to him, Mantis and Groot were gushing about the little details and Nebula, surprisingly, seemed to enjoy the movie.

And you? You were enchanted by the whole thing, from the dinner scene, to the little fair date and boat ride. From all catchy songs and romantic lines to the heartbreaking conflicts ang the heroic fights.

You laughed, you cried, and you were undeniably HOOKED.

And let's just say with a little bit of begging (and using your big black puppy eyes), you managed to convince your brother to get Yondu to find more of these wonderful films.

You would consume every single thing that Yondu could get his hands on in a crazy short amount of time. Mantis would find you huddled up into a little ball on the couch in the middle of the night, eyes gleaming like a little child as you watched whatever new DVD that Yondu had gotten his hands on.

From old Disney movies like Cinderella and Beauty and the Beast, to the more modern ones like Tangled and Frozen, you had seen them all.

But alas, 'The Little mermaid' is the one that holds your heart.

And as result of all the Disney that you've been slurping up, you eventually found yourself wondering if you're going to get your happy ending.

When is a prince Eric coming to sweep you off your feet? Take you on carriage rides and dancing at carnivals? Are you even going to get a happy ending?

Your brother told you there is someone for everyone in the galaxy.

"And when you meet them.....You'll know it."

He'd said, as he looked at Gamora with a warm loving gaze.

You found it hard to believe.

You'll know it when you meet them? How???

You were skeptical.

Until one day when the Guardians got invited to a party by Tony Stark himself, did you find yourself staring at a certain woman.

It was nearly midnight, the music was still blaring loudly and you found yourself getting a little too overwhelmed, so you decided to flee the scene to catch some fresh air.

You stepped outside, eyes closed as you feel the cool wind gently brush against your skin. You had expected that the party was going to be a little too much for you, but what you hadn't expected was for there to be someone else at the balcony.

This 'someone else' was a woman, and beautiful one at that. She was wearing a black cocktail dress, the fabric hugging her body in all the right places. Her fiery red mane was curled to perfection, the luscious tendrils framed her face like puzzle pieces that fell perfectly into place.

Ariel.

That was the first word that came to your mind.

Her eyes were closed, lengthy eyelashes fluttered in the wind, and she huffed out a deep sigh, seemingly bothered by whatever it is that's on her mind.

You reached out to place a hand on her shoulder, aiming to calm her down and maybe make her feel a little more at ease with the help of your powers.

But the slight brush of your fingertips against her skin was enough to make you end up on the cold ground. With your wrists pinned to the hard surface nonetheless.

Your antennaes tensed, the gears in your head were running miles per hour, one second you were reaching out and the next thing you know you had been headbutted onto the floor into a vulnerable position.

With your mind still spiralling, you spat out the first thing in your mind.

"H-hello! A-are you Ariel?"

What?

It looked like your question had taken the woman aback, her eyebrows furrowed in confusion. Did this bitch with antennaes just ask her if she was a Disney character?

"Am- Am I who??"

"A-ariel?"

You had no idea what's going on, but you were somehow very, very intrigued by the woman on top of you.

The woman looked at you up and down at your attire.

Party wear.

It took her a second before she realized that you were just one of the people invited tonight, and she quickly apologized.

"Sorry about that, my fight or flight reflexes just kicked in. And to answer your question, no, I am not Ariel. "

She chuckled in amusement when she saw you slightly deflate.

"Aw... Bummer"

You had mumbled to yourself, earning another chuckle from the redhead beside you.

You both stayed silent for a while after that, blocking out the muffled music playing inside and relishing in the peaceful night atmosphere outside.

"So...You're really not Ariel?"

Her head turned to look you, elbow on the balcony railing with her chin resting on ther palm.

"Sorry to dissapoint you, but no, I'm not."

The small pout that appeared on your lips made her smile.

The both of you started to pick on some random topics to talk about. Your jobs, hobbies, crime cases, outer space, everything you could possibly imagine.

Natasha could feel the click and so could you, the both of you felt a lot more settled than expected.

"So...Are you going to tell me your name"

You paused, you had completely forgotten to tell her your name. She let out a breathy laugh as you come to the realization.

"My name's Y/n, I'm one of the Guardians."

you shyly mumbled, hand fiddling with an antennae, a sign that you're embarassed, it's a little habit you've had ever since you were a young bug.

"Y/n huh? I like that."

The way your name rolled off her lips made you slightly dizzy, it sounded good, way too good, enchanting even.

"Don't you want to know my actual name?"

Your ears perked up at that.

"It's Natasha, Natasha Romanoff."

"Wow..."

It was even prettier than you expected it to be, and it fits her a lot. Her voice kept repeating in your mind, and it won't go away.

The echo of her beautiful name.

Natasha Romanoff, Natasha Romanoff, Natasha Romanoff....

"Do you like my name that much?"

"Huh?"

"You've been saying my name in repeat for a while now."

yikes.

"And your face is all red"

double yikes.

Your antennaes drooped as you fidget in place, eyes looking anywhere but at her. Your mind was spinning, everything was going at full speed in there, you didn't know what to think, what to say, what to do, it was all so fast to the point where everything was a blur.

Seeing you panicking like this made her chuckle. Sure she knew she's got an effect on people, and she never really cared about them.

But what you're failing to see here is that you had just as much of an effect on her. The way you looked so attentively at her whenever she speaks, as if absorbing every single word with such care and warmth, the way your eyes gleam when you asked if she's Ariel, down to the way you're panicking at her teasing right now, everything about you made her feel all warm. Comfortable even.

You're odd, but it only made her want to get to know you more.

Her slender fingers reached out, gently lifting your chin to make you look at her.

"Do you know that you're very strange?"

The sensors on your head drooped even further at that, is it because you're not a Terran? Is it because you look weird and have antennaes?

"I'm sorry I'm not a terran..."

Her eyebrows furrowed.

"What?"

"I'm not like you Natasha, I'm not terran..."

You felt her hands move to cup your face, and oh how you wish you could lean on them forever.

"Y/n, you've misunderstood, I meant it in a good way, and you're strange because,well, you're you. You're unique. And it has nothing to do with having antennaes or not. Though they do add to your scale of cuteness."

She laughed as your face started to flush once more, releasing your face to lean on the railing.

You don't know if you wanna slap that cheeky grin off her lips or kiss her it off instead, but your mind was once again all hazy.

Gosh, you're down bad.

Leaning onto the railing, you closed your eyes to calm yourself down, focusing on the cool night wind blowing at your face.

It felt nice and calming. What time is it? It's probably way past midnight, and with the soft wind cradling you, your mind was starting to slowly fall into rest.

Unbeknownst to you, Natasha had her eyes on you this whole time, and your dipping head landed onto her waiting palm, stopping you from headbanging onto the railing.

She carried you as your knees started to buckle, carefully placing you on the couch in the living room. She watched over you until the guardians decided that it was time to leave, they thanked her and walked out into the night with you still fast asleep on Gamora's back.

The twinge of jealousy that appeared was something unexpected.

Why is she jealous? Was it the fact that you seem so comfortable the zenwhoberian? Was it because she wanted to be the one you snuggle into? The one you're most comfortable with?

Whatever it is, she knew she must meet you again.

You woke up in a daze the next morning. How'd you end up back in your room? Weren't you talking with Natasha?

Where's Natasha?

The sound of the door creaking open put your thoughts to a pause.

"Y/n! Breakfast is ready!"

Peter walked in with a glass of water in his hand, handing it over for you to drink.

"What's on your mind? I can see the gears in your head turning you know?"

You placed the glass down on the nightstand before turning to face you brother.

"PETER!"

"Wha- why the shout?!"

"What did you do before you married Mora?"

A blink.

Another blink.

"Oh, I proposed."

"What's proposed?"

And that's how Peter ended up telling you the whole story of him going ring shopping.

"I wanna buy a ring!"

Peter choked on his own spit. Whom for?? When did you find a lover?

"I wanna propose to Natasha!"

And the next thing he knew, he was already dragged out of the door.

The day somehow ended with you bouncing on your feet outside the avengers compound, a panting Peter Quill right behind you.

You had requested to meet Natasha, and was currently waiting for her to come down the multiple floors of the tower.

Peter was still trying to catch his breath after running around non-stop for the whole day.

"Y/n *pant* you can't just-"

He was cut off by the sound of the elevator door opening, revealing the gorgeous red-headed woman of your dreams.

"Hey Y/n, what's up-"

"Marry me!"

The whole floor went silent. Until Peter awkwardly spoke up,

"Sorry, I really tried to stop her, but she wouldn't listen."

When the redhead heard that you had come to give her a visit, she was much more excited than she would admit, her heart was pounding and she was in the elevator merely seconds after she heard the information, wanting to know why you were here again.

But a proposal from you was not something that she had expected.

"Marry me please Natasha?"

She looked at you standing there with puppy eyes, your hands presenting a red gemmed ring pop to her. This was certainly not something she gets to see everyday.

A hearty chuckle escaped her lips, and you deflated a bit, thinking that maybe she was mocking you. But your thoughts were dismissed when you feel a pair of soft lips pressed against your cheek.

"You're adorable you know that?"

You were frozen in place, did she just kiss you on the cheek?

What does this mean?

"As cute as this whole proposal was, I think I'll have to refuse it."

Your antennaes drooped in disappointment. You just got rejected.

"But instead..."

She placed her fingers on your chin.

"Let me take you out on a few dates first hm?"

Your mouth open and closed in wordless confusion.

"Date?"

"Yes date, we can go anywhere you'd like, how about that?"

Your eyes gleamed.

"Can we watch The Little Mermaid?"

She threw her head back laughing. Oh, could you be any cuter than you already are? But of course, she nodded and pulled you with her into the elevator. Leaving poor Peter to go back to the ship by himself.

Though he didn't mind, because seeing his sister so happy was worth it.

Maybe you'd have your happy ending after all, not with Prince Eric, but with beautiful badass Ariel instead.

And that's more than enough for you ❤️

Oh, and Thor asked for the ring pop, and you gave it to him. Thor is happy. Good job!

MASTERLIST

Tbh I deleted the whole thing halfway through cause it was a mess and I hated it, and so I had to rewrite it again😂

[birdmitosis]

Are you still dining the ask game? If you are what are your thoughts on the pristine blade

[ask game here]

LOL okay I will definitely do this one. This is a very cool ask actually and I am so excited to share my thoughts on the pristine blade itself!

First impression

This is just our implement. We had to have a weapon of some sort available to us to be able to slay the Princess, right? Mostly I just kinda dismissed the blade as a storytelling convention and that's about it.

Impression now

Much more intrigued, honestly! The pristine blade is one of the only parts of the Construct besides us, the Princess, the Narrator in our head, and the environment. It is almost always there (besides in The Wraith, interestingly enough) and it is always "pristine" -- even in the dirt or covered in blood. Is it a piece of us? A piece of the Princess? A piece that came from the messy tear that separated us? And does it have any connection to the Princess's chains -- the only other part of the Construct besides those things? What does its being "pristine" signify? There is definitely something about this blade...

Favorite moment

When you hold it the "cool" way by default if you take the blade in The Apotheosis. That combined with the swell of epic music and us facing down a Biblically Accurate Princess large enough to have her own gravitational pull just made me cheer out loud when I first saw it!

Idea for a story

This one's a bit harder. I haven't had any real ideas up to now, except to explore in various fic how the voices might choose to arm themselves post-Construct, who would continue to choose blades, or if they managed to have the blade when they left who would most often have it (or be allowed to)...

I could also, though, see a fun fic coming from the idea of "what if the blade was available in The Wraith?" Or maybe what if it wasn't available at all in The Den or The Thorn?

Unpopular opinion

IDK if this is super unpopular, but I think it is even more interesting and fucked up and badass of her if you go the route of screwing up so bad with Thorn that she swallows the blade whole. If nothing else, it really shows how much of Witch is still in her, and I love that!

Favorite relationship

I can't narrow it down to just one!

I love the relationship Cold has with the blade as almost an extension of himself, as both being weapons. I love Contrarian's dedication (until the Stranger ending) to throwing it out the window and also his insistence to hold it the other way that comes back in The Apotheosis even though he's not there! I love Hunted's relationship to the "steel claw." I love Paranoid's moment of "steel can't lie to us," and how she's perfectly willing to use it to slit our own throat despite desperately not wanting to die before. I love Skeptic refusing to let you not take the blade and being willing and able to stop your heart if you don't use it in the leadup to The Grey!

I also love Adversary wanting us to stab her with it. How Damsel is perfectly willing to let you chop bits of her off with it (how metaphorical), and accepts her death if you slay her with it with tears in her eyes, and has it firmly in her heart as the Burned Grey, and if you reach for it she gently holds your hand there. How Prisoner uses it to cut off her own head. Everything about Witch and Thorn's relationship to it, whether things go well or terribly. How in The Wraith it just disappears entirely, for the only time in the entire game!

And I love how desperately the Narrator clings to it, needs it to be there. And I love the relationship the Princess (Harsh, Soft, or Stranger) in Shifty's heart has with it; her line that since you chose to take the blade, it has to be used, just gets me right in the heart.

I guess if I had to chose, out of those three... "categories" I suppose? I'd choose Skeptic, Damsel -> Burned Grey, and Shifty's Heart.

Favorite headcanon

I mean, it's not confirmed, but I think I like the idea that the pristine blade and the Princess's chains are similar things. Only you can use the pristine blade to attack with, though the Princess can use it against herself (Prisoner and Thorn most obviously), she never stabs you with it even when she winds up with a blade of her own; you have very little effect over the chains, only being able to be trapped in them in The Prisoner, while Prisoner can attack you with them, several of the vessels can free themselves from them, and the ones you free from them plant the idea in your head first (Damsel, Tower). The chains, like the blade, are always in the same place until certain Chapter IIIs, where sometimes they disappear.

The pristine blade is tied to the Long Quiet in some way, may be a part of him, while the chains are tied to the Shifting Mound in some way. Again, not confirmed, but I really like the idea.

ETA: @salty-an-disco pointed out a thing that makes EVEN MORE sense and is super cool: the idea that the pristine blade is actually a piece of the Shifting Mound (a piece of death that you can use to kill with), while the chains are a piece of the Long Quiet (stagnancy trying to trap her)! So the pristine blade is actually tied to the Shifting Mound as a part of her, while the chains are tied to the Long Quiet likewise.

Again, not confirmed, but this idea rocks so much that I am immediately adopting it forever.

[tornoleander]

Wow, you're the beta reader for bbnb? I didn't know that. (So you can confirm that Hat is infact not dead because I haven't seen any activity from them in a while and my brain always jumps to worst case scenarios)

Anyway, definitely didn't forget to respond for like a week, but here are some of my theories/scenarios:

-I still think Cole's the one who'll remember bits and pieces because A. He's a ghost B. Hat used he/him when talking about who will remember and C. It would be incredibly emotionaly impactful

-HOWEVER, I think Pixal could also remember some stuff. None of the emotional stuff but she did technically die when Nadakhan erased her. Besides, it could be fun to see her try to let Jay or Nya know she remembers while still stuck to Zane.

-also Zane's falcon died but he was never mentioned in this fic so 😔

-Jay DEFINITELY has c-ptsd. Like, 100%, I'm sure the nurse/psychologist whose name I forgor would agree with me

-I'm pretty sure Wu just died by some falling island or something like that. Or he could've died by the storm, that would be cool.

-I know he said that swearing is a sign of weak verbal skills but I feel like Jay would start swearing more for comfort. Like, Nadakhan hated it but never truly did anything horrible to him because of it :)

most of the scenarios in my head play out with the ninja being captured again

-for example, Jay using his internal electricity to shock someone when they all have vengestone

-or them getting tazed and Jay sending the current back like he did in the electric chair

-or they're all traped and saying shit like "there's no other option" or something and Jay replying with "suicide's still an option" like that's a normal thing to say which obviously worries the others

And then there's the non captured scenarios

-something something Jay falling into autopilot after being told/asked to clean to ship and ends up also cleaning the hull "Why are you cleaning the bottom? We're in the air and you're not even tied to anything???" ".... trauma response?"

-or just straight up Jay having a panic attack out of seemingly sowhere (Cole said he wished he could eat cake again)

Anyway, those are the things I could think of right now, there's more but it's 3:39am and I'm tired :3

Hope it's not too long lol

Yep! As of ch 15. Me and hat have been chatting for a while and I bug them for feedback on Art accuracy so I help them with some writing corrections too!

I have been working on beta reading earlier chapters as well currently half way through 4. It is certainly an experience but now I yell my feelings into comment instead of just the void

*reaches through horrific horror to correct spelling mistake.

Yup Hat is alive! They were just fixated on something else for a while but they are back.

Ok now for scenarios

-Cole remembering bits……. I will refrain from giving my thoughts.

-Pixal and Zane’s falcon died pretty early so I do think they may remember up till then but It probably wouldn’t help understand much.

-I don’t think Wu died? But it’s not impossible.

-CPTSD?

I will ask hat about this one but seeing as bbnb events qualify as at least 4/6 of these causes of it AND ptsd is a tag I’m going to give it a yeah. Cause non complex ptsd is typically less prolonged.

-the swearing I do think he might do more but not necessarily for comfort

-For your head scenarios I am not sure all the ways hat is planned show how the events of the fic messed him up. But I know they’re a big fan of consequences for events…

From what I’m guessing he is going to be trying his best to hide everything and it’ll be somewhat canon compliant? But to be fair He is pretty consistently the most mentally unstable ninja. Take This with a big grain of salt I’m saving the analysis for my skybound video, but his behavior does generally line up well with SA surivers. the first time that Jays a prisoner post Skybound is when he says “You don’t argue with a man who’s navel is that close”

Which

Drives me insane by the way

Side tangent, I’ve been doing a lot of Skybound digging for my eventual video essay. And my current best theory on why this is a line has to do with SA of men being played for laughs.

Like older audiences are supposed to hear that and find it fucking funny. It’s unfortunately not uncommon in kids programming. My quest to best explain why S6 is so uncomfortable has been… enlightening. Terrified of approaching a controversial topic so I have been learning a-lot about approach and how to not be awful. But my fixation is being channeled led into the eventual Skybound video.

Hope I answered what you wanted to know and It wasn’t purely my Adhd rambling

[raynavan]

heavy spoilers for chapter 23 of Always by your side by @ingo-ingoing-ingone!! this chapter was so fantastic i. didnt have words for it. ended up doing 6 (nearly 7) drawings for it instead. i think this is my record- it took me roughly 7 hours. a fair warning! this is both art and a comment to the fic in one. so its rather long!

ok i had an Unreasonable amount of fun doing the background on this one. ended up looking up a lot of the celestial bodies mentioned in the fic, man are they cool! it was implied that Emmet didn't really have a body so! stars instead. the colors were fun- i dont often let myself just. color like this haha! this one was... reall amazing. a fantastic opener! i immediately latched onto the visuals and painted a picture in my mind. it was just so... astronomical?

i actually struggled with how i was going to position these two for a while. at first it was just them coloring in a clearing- then i made them watching pokemon, and then. this! idk- there just something sweet in how Ingo turns around to look at Emmet and... lighting was funky for this one- how a forest shades the things beneath it will always hold a special place in my heart. these two interacting is always so wonderful to read. the gentle ribbing and teasing and... just them chilling and talking was so nice. the fact that it was dragons was even better! dragons are the best. i felt a very sweet and gentle moment needed an equally sweet and gentle drawing. if i could, i might have gone for line less on Ingo and Emmet here as well.

right- this was the last one i did. i think its the only one that i didn't get specifically from what was written. i just... wanted to give Emmet cuddles alright? /lh i had another sketch exploring exactly what Emmet might look, but i think ill revisit that when i... haven't been drawing for 7 hours straight hgfireohgope. the one in this is more simplified. the horror of having your face show one emotion- not even the one your most known for... your voice is toneless and the only was you can show even a fraction of what you feel is by copying what you (supposedly) dead brother used to do. there is a quiet horror in that- and yet Emmet still goes on. he cant feel texture and yet... he deserves many nice things.

this one!!! was originally going to be an Entire piece with a more "realistic" drawing of Ingo sitting behind a fire just like this. when i sketched this out (in the middle of reading it) that was the plan. Jedi saved me by making Emmet draw it like this. you saved me probably an hour ghirepoghpeirh. i... still might draw it how i wanted at some point. also the lighting was added last minute! i thought it would look... more messy with the light of the fire shining on it. i think it looks nice. the scene was sweet and, like Emmet mentioned he did, i put emphasis (or uh... thicker more defined lines) around peoples faces to better define their happiness. it made me happy to read them being happy and then draw them being happy <3

them!!!!!! i do not think it is a secret at All how much i love this au. i was More than happy to draw them again. and!!! being happy!!! perfect. i remembered this was a dream, and decided to blur the background quite a bit of this one- lopsided like its not really being thought about. adored this one. them!! teasing each other!! just!! going through a day!! perfect. amazing. it was really fun the way the small details of their routine was captured. from Ingo just. turning to goop so he doesn't have to pick up his clothes to Emmet just. accepting everything that happened from the mental connection to the shared feelings.

DRAMATIC FORESHORTENING!!!! i almost wanted to play it up More but then i might lose Ingo's expression. the background for this was fun to do- emphasis! strong colors!! looks like something broke. like something was torn away. this whole bit is just. exactly what Emmet fears and its just. ough. Ingo would never do this- we know this, Emmet knows this two- he knows how ridiculous Ingo was being here. and then the climax with Emmet just... falling off... amazing. Ingo's horrified expression is what caught my attention here, though i had a few more ideas depicting Ingo leaning over Emmet. i figured a dramatic drawing here would fit.

so! there ya go. i had. so much fun doing this and! thank you so much for writing this and sharing with us Jedi. if you keep this up, ill just have to keep making more drawings!! i don't think words are enough- not even sure if these can properly express how i felt reading it all (i actual had to get up and pace around bc i got so excited) but! i think that your art inspired my own art is a very beautiful thing.

lets all keep making art with one another forever.

[termagax]

i hesitate to reblog my comic pages a whole bunch of times because i have a lot of personal gripes and things i dont think look very good or i wouldve done differently or reworked if i hadnt been so fed up with it ESP. the dialogue im so bad at dialogue and i worry that reblogging it a bunch is gonna let other people notice that especially so long after ive made it. but also there are a few panels tjat ARE so so so cute

these first ones especially look good and i KNOW thats because the entire comic was just to give justification to THIS SHOT i LOVE this shot i was havign DREAMS avout this shot i have 5 different abandoned attempts to write it out in a fic i spent days thinking of nothing except how badly i wanted to cut his hair and run my hands over it and kiss him on his stupid head and i think it REALLY shows. esp the angle of his head when its turned away from the camera like that looks SOOOO good to me.

this bits fine i think it couldve been laid out better and i wish i was good at lettering but the drawings themselves are fine. i DONT think i figured out how to draw this hairstyle like i dont think it comes across well unless you already know what hes supposed to look like. but its fineeee i like how square i made his head and i like the ideaaaa of making fun of him for being old so i think the interaction is cute enough to justify the jank

THIS PANEL ALSO. JUST SO CUTEEEEEEE theres a lot of jank w proportions and shape but again the interaction is everything to me i like the idea that he isnt really comfortable being looked at like that? like in my head hes not an insecure guy and clearly hes very very confident in himself and his appearance but i just dont think hes comfortable being. treated affectionately in that way ? if that makes sense? i know some people disagree with this but i just dont think he really dates or even really does hookups so i think hes just easy to fluster. hes a confident guy but the attention he gets is usually more people being scared or finding him weird or offputting or gross. scary dog. so i just like the idea that he gets embarrassed when they look at him or call him pretty. and also i like when he shrugs it off by being a dickhead.

i wish i liked the panels on the second page more but it was a huge struggle to figure out and id been working on it for like 8 hours and i was so annoyed and none of the panels were turning out and i couldnt come up with anything better than the PLACEHOLDER DIALOGUE. and the panelling is ROUGHHH like the layout is just not good and i dont think it communicates what i wanted to.

but THIS panel is so cute to me I LOVE THEMMMMMM my friends my best friends. you can actually see on the hand here and a few other shots on this page i was STRUGGLING w my lines and was trying out a different technique that my best friend nini suggested where you block in a sillouhette and then erase out the middle chunk. and it looks really cool i like the look of it but i think you can clearly tell which things are done that way and which ones arent so its a bit jarring. but i DO wanna use that more because it looks good it just kind of conflicts with my normal process so i have to find a Project. it doesnt work well w an undersketch so i tend to use it when a pose just is NOT coming together or when i can really see it in my mind and just cant get the structures to work out.

this shot is ALSO REALLY CUTEEEEEEEEEEEEE I LOVE HIS FACE. this comic was fun because i usually use his long hair to cover his face (because i think its cute and cheeky to not show his face as much as possible and esp. when hes younger i just like the idea that he sort of hides it even before he had the mask.) so i dont have to worry about his expressions as much so it was FUN to get to draw his whole face. but also it changes the balance of what details i have room for? idk if you guys have noticed but i try to keep my shapes really distinct and my art not too busy so there are pieces where i will fully leave out details i think are there especially his facial piercings (youll notice he doesnt have them in this comic) and sometimes even his scar if the piece is too busy in the head/torso region. and a lot of times between his bangs and the way i do his facial hair i just end up leaving the scar out or leaving it as light implication. but it is always there. so because his hair is out of his face i got to consistently include it (though not every panel - see the one i talked about earlier? i leave it out there because i think itd make the blush lines not read as well and i was trying to stick to black and white.) and that was interesting to proportion. BUT ANYWAYS. this panel is so cute i think everything came out really well and i kind of nailed the style i was going for with it like the tooneyness is just totally there. i struggle sometimes with figuring out the right way to do his jawline and i think this one just clicked so nicely and its exacltly what i wanted it to look like.

although if youll permit me to ramble EVEN LONGER i worry sometimes that going so cartoony means he doesnt look "like roadhog" like ovw has such a semirealist style which i hardcore struggle with sometimes (and u can tell in this comic when i do try for that it doesnt looook as good) and i worry that im abstracting the realness out of him and not communicating it as well as some of the artists i really look up to who are SUPER good at striking that balance btwn cartoony exaggeration and expression and realistic weight and proportion (im not gonna namedrop but youve certainly seen me gush about their stuff before). it wouldnt bother me so much if he had like a canonical face like i dont sweat it with rat everyone knows what rat looks like but this is a guy i made up in my mind so i REALLY WANT to be able to communicate what i think he looks like so i get nervous doing these abstractions. but ultimately i think those abstractions are the better half of my work they just look better and i basically only draw for me anyways so leaving details implied works fine for me (ie: when i see his face in my head i think he has a lot more signs of age. but i leave them out because it would clutter the place too much)

anyways sorry for the impromptu directors commentary i just think SO MUCH abt my art and every decision i make has like 900 years of thought behind it and i like to talk. thanks if you read this far i love you 🫶

[girlfriendsofthegalaxy]

tuesday again 10/10/2023

by dry volume, this post is 80% talking about gallery walls. tl;dr : do not buy or hang up things you do not like in a vague attempt to make your house look more grownup ONLY put up things you love, mat your art to give it visual room to breathe.

listening

had a playlist of the james bond theme songs on while i was deep cleaning my kitchen and the line "YOU GOT TO GIVE THE OTHER FELLA HELL!!! " from SPECIFICALLY the guns 'n roses cover of live and let die (even though the playlist had the correct mccartney version) has been THOROUGHLY stuck in my brain for forty eight hours.

-

reading

academic transphobia to follow:

an anti-reading section, for once. Retraction Watch (site that tracks academic paper retractions and major academic beef like when someone is stripped of tenure for fraud, formerly my beloved) published an op-ed by an anthropologist TERF who is Big Mad she got called out by her professional association for trying to submit a conference talk that amounted to hate speech against her trans colleagues in the name of the stupid fucking largely disproven sexing skeletons thing. the comments have devolved into the professor sock puppeting anyone who goes "hey RW why did you platform this?"

would be very interested to hear from RW about how a retracted conference talk has the same impact on the scientific community as a retracted paper, but we'll fucking see. i think RW provides an important service to the scientific community (they are the most indepth and thorough tracker of retractions, more so than the actual publishers) but this is a fucking weird move

-

watching

rewatched Who Framed Roger Rabbit? (1988, dir. Zemeckis) for fic research. GOD this movie is fucking good. it performs a minor animation miracle every thirty seconds.

-

playing

nothing to report

-

making

by popular demand (four people), some thoughts about gallery walls. some discourse on the method, if you will. i went with a gallery wall bc i like the look and i had an extremely large blank wall to fill bc this apartment is slightly too big for me. the string lights remind me very much of my dorm rooms but cool lamps have been few and far between down here.

how to get art (and why/caveats)

i honestly don't have a ton of direct collecting advice here other than "have you tried going to a lot of thrift stores". i cheat bc both my parents were architects who collected art, everyone in my family dabbles in fine art, and my sister has her bachelors in art history. so i am awash in paper, constantly. i grew up with a set of flatfiles and a closet full of spare frames. i recognize most people do not grow up like this.

with that caveat out of the way, how do i actually get my art? usually one piece at a time over a very long period of time. there's a postcard on my gallery wall i got in 2009. this is a game you will be playing for the rest of your life as you discover things you like and your tastes evolve.

it is VITAL that you love every piece on your walls. no filler ikea canvases unless you actually like them. the instant you start thinking "oh i need a landscape to look Grownup" you have to strangle that thought in the cradle. there are no rules, especially in art. put whatever the fuck you want up on your walls with no regard for the public's taste.

i feel like "i should buy and put up more art" is something that often falls into a vague Grownup Improvement Goal (like budgeting) bc it is an Grownup Improvement Goal and not bc they actually want to buy and put up more art. fortunately for everyone, you do not have to buy or put up Morally or Socially Improving art that will impress some vague category of grownups, bc we don't fucking live in victorian times.

most importantly you do not need to spend much (or in some cases any) money to put things on your walls. getting the effect you want (fancy washi tape, matching frames) may take some money, but using the printer at work and stealing some scotch tape is free.

how to get art (actual advice this time)

i feel a little silly typing this all out but i really like reading other chewsdayposters' processes, and it is really helpful for me a lot of the time to have someone say: actually there is this complete other way of doing something you have never considered bc u did not grow up with it

i ask you: do you have a stack of sentimental papers somewhere in your home? congrats you have some frameable items. a thing does not need to be Fine Art to be in a frame to go on the wall and make you happy. tape up a birthday card. put a quilt up on your wall. pushpin a label from a jar of pickled herring bc it reminds you of your grandma. frame a beloved tshirt. this is a martha stewart ass statement but things that are not traditional paper art on your walls will add variety and whimsy to your home.

other places for art that are not thrift/estate/yard sales:

i do believe that making your own art, including a $3 paint-by-numbers kit, will fix something in your brain. it's very similar to how i personally have to go stand with my feet in a body of water twice a year or THE SLUDGE smothers my brain

your favorite weird indie bands are almost certainly selling posters on bandcamp even if they're not currently on tour

i like the artists' co-op justseeds for art that deals with "social, environmental, and political engagement" like my beloved "fuck space tourism" poster

start a "good lines" or equivalent "art i like" tag on here and buy prints when u have the money. even if artists here don't have a shop open or don't have the specific piece u want as a print, ask if u can throw them an appropriate amount of money on venmo or something and get it printed locally or online. ive had good luck with vistaprint and they have rolling sales

do you like a piece of art in the public domain, like something from a museum? print it out. put it in a frame. no it's not as nice as a professional print but it's free if you do it at work and now it's on your wall

fuck around on wikimedia commons and the internet archive. i particularly love pulp magazine covers and little illustrative insets for out of date astronomy books

non- and semi-consumable supplies

if u put $25 into supplies u can use for many many other projects (i assume you probably have some of the following list), you can make any frame nice and save approximately a gajillion dollars.

good utility knife and extra blades

hammer

tape measure

level (comes with most command hook packs, you can also use your phone)

stepstool, sturdy chair, or patient tall person

assorted nails (you can buy a little tackle box with assorted nails from most big box stores)

little squeezy tube of DryDex spackle ($5) and putty knife or honestly old credit card to fill in nail holes when you move out

OR command strips and hooks

matboard that is white on one side and black on the other (~$8 at big box craft stores). you can use this to cut your own mats and/or replace a kind of weird back on an otherwise good frame

most printer paper these days is acid free. steal some from your workplace.

assorted small brushes

little thing of acrylic paint in whatever color you want your frames to be (~$1.50 ea). you can also spray paint your frames for a different finish but i don't have the space or patience in this apartment

sandpaper or sacrificial emery board

i would further recommend a little set of letter size desktop drawers/mini flatfiles like this to keep all the small stuff you want to frame in one place. i have sentimental art i don't want to frame in one drawer and things i do want to frame in the other. this has been very good for my brain bc it's all safely and flatly contained out of sight, and it's easy to flick through a stack of things i already love when i need one more small thing or one warmer thing to fill a gap

frames

the good news for us is that frames and art are a fucking bitch to move and people frequently give them away. your local discount and thrift stores are going to be fucking awash in small frames 8.5"x11" and under for under $3 each. when you are thrifting or estate saling or yard saling or generally gallivanting about on a weekend, pay little attention to any art actually in a frame. is the frame in okay shape? can you repaint it without too much trouble? will it clean up all right? does it have the glass? can you insert the glass from a different frame into the one you actually want without any thrift store employees noticing?

for weird sizes above 8.5x11 and outside poster size that cannot be easily found at thrift stores, the big box craft stores here in america have roughly quarterly frame sales and frequent coupons. do NOT get your shit professionally framed at michaels bc they upcharge by about 3x compared to other local framers (both on the east coast and here in tx).

i went through two periods of seriously buying frames (last year of high school and the year i moved into the original lair, when/where i thought i was going to stay for a few years) and ive swapped in out and between those dozen or so total. once you have built up a little stock of frames that fit the general sizes of art you tend to collect, ur pretty good for a while. the only new "frame" i bought for my gallery wall was a little floating shelf.

mats

the absolute biggest fucking thing u can do to make your art look nicer is mat that bitch, which gives it room to breathe. if your art does not have a built in border or a lot of white space (see 9, 12, and 13 in the gallery wall below, as well as 8 which has a ton of negative space with the car door), you need a frame bigger than your art. you can google the suggested proportions yourself or decide with your heart.

i am a big fan of a very slapdash floating mat, which means cutting a piece of printer paper to size or flipping around the paper that tells you what size the frame is and slapping your art right on top of that, sometimes with a lick of gluestick to keep it in place. generally a floating mat means a sort of 3D matting technique but we don't have time for that. do not do this printer paper technique long-term with a particularly beloved or expensive piece of art.

u can also buy pre-cut mats at Michaels or Joann’s for not too too many dollars, or cut your own with the acid-free matboard ($10 for a poster board sized piece) and a new utility knife blade and a steady hand. or, if you're lucky, it comes with the frame.

gallery wall specific advice

there aren't any rules. actual galleries and museums tend to put the center of a piece or group of pieces at 57" from the floor. you may want to fuck around with that depending on your own height, the space you have, and the pieces you own.

a gallery wall does not need to be 24 pieces like this one. it can be any number.

this is the first one i have done mostly by myself and it is the most color-restricted one i have ever put up. it is also the one with the most successful repeating motif (circles). usually i grab the art i want most to go together and send pics to my art historian sister who will then arrange it for me and say shit like “do you have another small blue thing for the top left” or “do you have two pieces that are warmer and larger” or "different frame for the middle left"

look at a lot of other gallery walls. personally i like the ones that have non-framed and non-square things in them. ideally mine would have photographs and taxidermy in it for maximum weirdness. but u cannot go wrong with a grid, or all horizontal pieces, or all vertical pieces. for a full wall puzzle piece like this, u do not generally want an american southwest four corners meeting situation. stagger it. lay everything out on the floor and move it around eighteen times (this is the worst part). the gallery wall as a whole does not have to be perfectly aligned to the ceiling or the back of your couch or what have you. it can be sort of an organic blob shape along the top and bottom edges.

my wall

this soothing blue and green wall with wood tone pops has pieces from almost half my life. it skews later in college/recent acquisitions, as i sharpened my taste for limited-number prints and had a car to go to thrift stores with, but that’s just how this specific wall came together

the list below should tell you what each piece is, how much i paid for it (and the cost of the frame if applicable), and when i got it. this wall has most of the Nice Art in my collection that is signed/numbered/in some way slightly fancier bc it is the wall i stare at when on my couch.

embroidered Scorpio constellation hoop, birthday gift from my sister (free, came with hoop, i used some makerspace felt and batting to properly back and finish it much later so free with my tuition), nov 2016

numbered and signed print of an italianate cityscape, $5 and came with the frame and mat from an estate sale, i put a new back on it with scrap matboard so the back of the print wasn't just naked, fall 2021

signed print of a new england landscape, came with the frame and the mat but is stained right over the signature :( $2.50 from salvation army, one of the last things i bought in spring 2023 before i moved

signed original multimedia on board collage by my sister from her like second ever gallery show, $69 in winter 2022 for the art, the frame was from a free pile i gave a new acid free back with scrap matboard. that was such a good free pile i got a huge pile of frames from that

magazine page (idk which one either) i saved in high school (i graduated in 2013) or very early college, frame was from a free pile by the side of the road in summer 2021 and repainted with some white acrylic paint. it is float matted with printer paper. maybe a dollar for the paint? i definitely did not buy the magazine

this is an out of print poster by one of my favorite living artists (Josh McPhee) so i emailed him and asked if i could get it printed myself if i threw him $25 and he said yes. i think it cost $22 to get it printed professionally, the frame is basics by studio decor ($20 for a 2-pack) (i spent so much money and time on this one bc i wanted a very specific look for a very specific space in my kitchen in the old apartment), feb 22

signed numbered woodcut by Roger Peet ($20 in august 2020), another studiobasics frame that was i think $8 in summer 2022. float matted with acid free matboard and not printer paper.

gigantic fuckoff unsigned unlabeled poster i bought bc she reminds me of the Barnes & Noble murals, $10 at goodwill (came with the frame, half off) sep 2023

star chart from the US Naval Observatory that was on a free shelf at Amherst College when i was taking a class there in fall 2018, another studiobasics frame (idk when i bought this one) so under $10. float mount on acid free printer paper.

plaster frog mirror from an estate sale in spring 2021, i do not remember how much i paid for it but it was not more than $5

oh goddamnit this is a new block so of course it restarted the numbering. fatal off by a power of ten error, very typical for astronomy. poster from a show i went to in college spring 2015, do not remember when i bought this sub-$10 studiobasics frame either, float mount on acid free printer paper.

signed poster from my roommate-at-the-time’s cousin’s band in fall 2014 (i can’t actually find the receipt but i did find an email from her cousin letting me know he shipped me and my roommate’s orders together lol) let’s say $20, another sub-$10 studiobasics frame of mysterious provenance.

moon map out of an old science book in high school, let’s be generous and say $10 for both the book and the frame (another studiobasics)

numbered but unsigned new year’s print from a local-ish print shop in massachusetts, $12 at savers with the frame, fall 2022

cover of a very fragile vintage paperback copy of raymond c/handler’s The Long G/oodbye i acquired in high school (could not have been more than a dollar or two), with a frame and mat that came in an ikea multipack my dad bought me in high school bc i had a set of l/ackadaisy miniposters i wanted to hang, looks like the closest modern equivalent is the EDSBRUCK, a single will run you about $12 today

postcard inherited from my grandpa’s collection of loose paraphernalia in 2010 (free but at what cost etc), frame is a studiobasics that come in a pack of 6 for $20 (less if you have a coupon) so let’s round down a smidge and say $3. don’t remember when i bought this frame either, it is matted with real matboard bc the postcard and the back of the frame are so thin

“my heart is a fish” cross stitch (a reference to the imperial radch trilogy of books) i made this and did not date it but i know i blogged about it on here at some point between 2014-2018, i remember having to buy five colors of thread but owned the hoop already, again back and finished it properly much later with maskerspace batting and felt, let’s say $5 not counting my time

postcard from @believerindaydreams last winter in another studiobasics frame and float mounted with acid free matboard.

tiny moon mirror from salvation army in early spring 2015, under $5

CD mirror from Vapor95 ($125? preorder in fall 2021), came with velcro command strips which was very nice of them

a $300 original multimedia collage (the first one my sister ever made, when she was in middle school) i bought in spring 2021 from her first show, sitting on a $5 acrylic shelf from five below i bought last month

22-24 are national geographic maps, 50c each at an estate sale last month, had to buy $7 worth of binder clips and pushpins to put them up bc i don’t fucking know what box they’re in and didn’t have time to rip the whole closet of boxes im ignoring apart

a slightly longer tl;dr: do not buy or hang up things you do not like in a vague attempt to make your house look more grownup ONLY put up things you love, thrift and repaint your frames if possible but you can get very cheap studiobasics ones if you want them all to match, acid-free mat your art for preservation and to give it room to breathe, keep a little drawer or box of stuff you love and might want to frame

[pradaxstyles]

All Gone (The Promise)

Pairing: Ellie Williams x Female Reader 

Word count: 1.6k+

Warnings: Mentions of Abby, swearing, she’s angsty, no use of y/n, Ellie leaves Reader to avenge Joel, this does not have a happy ending, if I missed anything please let me know!! 

Alexa’s notes✨: Hiiiii my lovely friends!! I tried writing this fic a little differently, so let me know if you like it! I’m really proud with how this turned out and I hope you enjoy reading it! Please come chat in my inbox or let me know what you thought!! Reblogs mean the world <3 

•·················•·················•

Ellie knew.

She knew that she couldn’t keep doing these things without any repercussions. The bitch named Karma was still very much alive and she was coming with a vengeance. You can’t do the things Ellie’s done without looking over your shoulder, wondering if this is it.

Wondering if today is the fucking day that she would see the sun. If it was the last day she would see your face.

Gosh, your face. You were Ellie’s light in everything. Through the horrors and endless sleepless nights in Seattle, you were right there. Consoling her and reminding her that she was safe and that you were right there. Right there within her grasp. Even when she left for Santa Barbara, you were ready to go with her without a second thought.

“I can’t ask you to come with me”

Ellie stood against the kitchen counter, her arms crossed tightly over her chest. She tried to mask her face of any emotion, but found issue almost immediately. Ellie didn’t want to leave you, but she couldn't ask you to come with her and risk your life again. She risked a glance up at you and found a surprised look covering your features.

“Ellie, you know I would go with you in a heartbeat”

She shut her eyes so tightly she saw stars. Ellie didn’t want you to come with her. She couldn’t let herself corrupt you with her vicious need for revenge. She was afraid it was already too late.

It was eating her alive, the constant feeling that it was breathing down her neck, waiting for her to make a move.

“I know you would, but you can't. I need you to understand that. I can’t risk putting you in danger again for something that’s my problem.”

Ellie dropped her arms from her chest and ran a clammy hand on her jean clad thigh. Joel’s old jacket felt too warm and far too tight on her body despite the cool, early morning air.

You took a step towards her, “Ellie... you know your problems are mine too. We’ve discussed this alr-”

“I know we have, but this is something that I need to do on my own. If there wasn’t a high chance that I would die out there, I’d let you come with me, but I can’t risk that.”

You scoffed lightly, “Oh, so you can just go out there and die with no qualms about anything? But I have to stay here and wonder if you’re dead?” You pressed your lips into a thin, tight line as you shook your head slightly.

Ellie’s emerald eyes never left your face as she exhaled deeply. “That is not what I’m saying and you know it.” She needed you to understand. She didn’t know how to convey the fact that she couldn’t bear to lose you too. After Joel, you were the one to piece her back together and if she didn’t have you, Ellie wasn’t sure who she was. She couldn't do this life without you.

“No. No, Ellie. That’s exactly what you’re saying. Do you even hear yourself?” You waved a hand around in exasperation. “After everything, how can you just tell me I can’t go with you? I’m an adult just like you.”

Ellie couldn’t meet your heated gaze. She couldn’t look at you because you were right. You were always right it seemed. You were perfectly capable of handling yourself, but Ellie couldn’t live with herself if you died while helping her get revenge again, and hopefully for the last time. She opened her mouth to speak but she was cut off.

“You know what? You go. Go and just fucking kill everyone out in Santa Barbara until you find Abby. That’s what you want right? To be the one to finally, finally kill her. You want the accolades? Then go.”

Your breaths were labored now. You could feel the tension in your shoulders from the frustration, the tears threatening to fall from your eyes. How could she just leave everything you’ve built for someone like Abby? Why did she get to be more important than you and your life together?

Ellie looked down at her hands and let out a quiet sigh. This is the last way she wanted to leave things with you. She had an inkling it was coming eventually, there was only so much of her shit you could take, and Ellie thinks she’s finally pushed you over the edge.

She looked back up and met your pained gaze. She wanted nothing more than to smooth out the wrinkles that have made a home in between your eyebrows. Ellie could see right through your anger, right to the sadness she inflicted. She was always able to see right through you, read you like a book. “I’m sorry,” she whispered, defeat looming over her like a dark cloud.

You turned your body away from her and braced your hands on the counter. Wiping a stray tear, you closed your eyes. “If you’re going to go, just please go.” Your voice wavered, cracking slightly. Sniffing, you reached for the dish towel that was laid against the sink and wiped your eyes. You dropped your head slightly and took a deep breath.

Ellie moved so she was standing behind you and placed a soft hand on your shoulder. Your breath hitched slightly, and you leaned into her touch subconsciously. “I’m sorry, my sweet girl. I’m so sorry.” She ran her hand down the expanse of your back as if to memorize every ridge and line in your skin. A small sob left your chapped lips and you shrugged her hand off.

Ellie slung her backpack onto her shoulder and took her gun off the wall. She began the long trek to Santa Barbara alone and with the soft sounds of your cries replaying on a constant loop in her mind.

•·················•·················•

Ellie had made it to Santa Barbara.

Her thoughts were dangerous. Everything she had been through since she was a young girl was bubbling over, a menace that had made a home in a far tucked corner in her mind. Or maybe it was karma bidding her hello.

Either way, whatever it was, Ellie was ready to end this for good. She needed to put a stop to the deprecating thoughts, the endless feelings that whatever she did was never enough. They taunted her, always feeding her what she deemed to be true.

‘You’ll never evolve’

‘You are not enough’

‘You don’t have the will’

‘Might as well give up’

Ellie was exhausted. She was tired of  pretending that everything was okay. She hadn’t felt anything since Joel died and she thought that if she could finally end things here, that it would be okay. That she would be okay, made whole once again.  

Abby and Ellie fought bare, everything laid out before each other. All the scars, the pain, the back and forth that ravaged between them, it was finally coming to an end. Years of anguish, years of sorrow, years of torment, had finally led to this moment.

The murky ocean was up to Ellie’s knees and it threatened to knock her off balance. The gash on her side wasn’t aiding in anything, only making her feel more woozy.

There was a split moment where she saw Joel. She saw their life that once was and realized that she had never been more wrong. This wasn’t the end all be all. This would be her end if she went through with it. There would be no coming back from this. She could see karma waving in the distance, waiting for her to finish it.

Ellie had never felt so alone in her 21 years of life than she had in this moment.

She couldn’t do the same thing Abby did to her, take away her family.

So she let the girl go. Ellie couldn’t kill Abby. It wouldn’t bring any peace if another person’s blood was on her hands.

It wouldn’t bring Joel back. It wouldn’t bring back his stupid jokes, or his nightly guitar shenanigans. It wouldn’t do anything except haunt Ellie more.

Maybe karma wasn’t going to kill Ellie. No, that would be too easy. It would be too quick of an end for the immense amount of blood she has shed. The sticky, crimson blood that was now a ghost against her cracked and bruised hands.

No, karma wouldn’t do that.

Karma would slowly worm its way into Ellie’s mind. Plunging its sharp claws into her delicate memories, the ones she holds dear. It would remind her of everything she had and what she gave up in the frenzy for revenge. She’d feel every damn thing all over again and kick herself for it, praying to anyone above to make it stop.

Karma would break her down and torture her with everything she’s always wanted.

A future.

A home.

You.

You were everything Ellie’s ever wanted.

Ellie was sat on the beach, sobbing and gasping for the air her lungs so desperately needed. The dark ocean surrounded her as if she were her own little island, lost adrift. The sticky blood mixed with sweat and Santa Barbara’s salty ocean water had coated her skin in a thick, grimy layer.  If Joel could see her now, she thinks he’d be disappointed.

“You know better than this, kiddo.”

If Ellie closed her eyes long enough, she could hear his raspy voice. Almost like a whisper against the crashing waves.

That was what karma would do. The universe never made it easy for her, was never kind. It took and took with no apology.

It took Joel, and now it’s taken you.

It’s the last thing Ellie wanted, and it was the first thing she did.

[wetcatspellcaster]

Hi! Sorry to bother you again, I'm the one who asked you a while ago if it was okay to ask for some tips on writing dialogue. Thank you so much for your availability and time 🙇‍♀️ I'm mostly curious about how you structure your dialogues and how you manage to build chemistry between the characters through banter. Do you follow a particular set of rules or does it just come natural to you? You write so many ideas and cool dialogues, how do you manage to come up with so many? In general, if you have any tips for a fledgling "writer", they are super welcome. No pressure, of course, I really don't want to intrude/steal your time. P.s. I forgot last time to tell you that I also really loved your AU fic, Party Favours. I was hooked from the first lines and I had so much fun reading it. It was a really comforting and entertaining read, like drinking a hot chocolate in winter. Honestly, thank you so much for gifting us with such a warm and funny story. 🥰☕

Hey! Thank you for being so nice about my writing and the strengths you think I have - I didn't know I had them, so it was interesting to see my work from someone else's perspective.

And also don't worry, it's not a bother to answer this question. Although I'm not sure how helpful I'll be as I have no formal training and that might mean my explanations aren't useful!!

I'll try to answer as best I can :)

I don't really have rules for chemistry, I'll be honest, but my favourite dynamic (as is fucking obvious from many a fic I've written) is overconfident flirt/straight-laced practical killjoy. Luckily for me... there are a lot of these in media (Howl/Sophie, Tamaki/Haruhi, certain flavours of Buffy/Spike, Jude/Cardan from The Cruel Prince, Labyrinth fanfiction, whatever was going on with Emily Wilde's Encyclopedia of Faeries)! So I guess, if I was to give advice on that... I'd say if you really like a certain dynamic, go and look for examples of how they work elsewhere. Work out what it is about the pairing that makes your brain itch, or examine how these characteristic interactions play out, if there's any kind of formula to them - for instance, in Party Favours, the bit where Astarion is actively and overconfidently faking while talking to Threnn while Rose gets more and more flustered, was based partly on a fake relationship episode of Buffy lol. Like I didn't copy it word for word or anything, but it was an idea I saw elsewhere that I knew would be good for the pairing. .

Coming up with ideas... again, idk how idiosyncratic my process is. I maladaptive daydream a lot, and I really like scripting arguments (see above about what dynamics in fiction work for me, lmfao). i just love to hallucinate bickering, apparently. If I have any lines of dialogue that occur to me in any situation, I tend to put them into my notes app on my phone, to revisit later. If I have a scene with a particular purpose, I might look through my dialogue on my phone and try to find a series of quotes that work. Other times the maladaptive daydream for a few days might be the scene, and I'll write down any notes on what I want to happen and let it percolate for a few days before I actually write it. Sometimes pieces of dialogue will come to me before the scene does - Astarion's speech in chapter 7 of pieces happened before any of the rest of the fic, and then I was like "fuck. well. now i've got to get myself there." Mostly, this seems to just be a result of having these people live in my head rent free, but I'm also pretty autistic and so I script conversations a lot in social interactions anyway. .

Dialogue. I think dialogue comes naturally to me (see above comment about autism) and as such, I don't really follow any strict rules, I'm afraid... but these are some things I do formally try to do-

If a person is talking at someone (again, see how much I fucking love writing people bickering), you need to make sure it's not just a wall of text. Adding in paragraph breaks, even if it's a monologue, is kind of essential (speaking as someone who did not do this in the beginning, and it shows, particularly when you're reading my earlier fic on mobile rather than desktop). Often I will break it up with a one sentence interjection, a false start from the other person trying to get a word in edgeways, or a stage direction. I had a problem with one pairing I wrote for where one of the characters just would never speak... I needed to engineer lines for him to say even if it was completely superfluous. Sometimes, now I look at my writing, I feel like these are obviously fake and unnecessary... but they help break up the text and give the reader pauses. So they must be helpful, even if they're kind of just... there. it makes the dialogue a dialogue, with two people involved and reacting to each other. -

Similarly, speeding stuff up can be useful when creating banter, to keep pace and avoid people monologuing at each other. The key ways I tend to speed stuff up is usually a) characters finishing each other's sentences (derogatory or affectionate), b) interrupting each other (you'll notice my repeated 'Astarion-' is often used to get Astarion to just talk quicker and at more length and in more detail until Rose loses her goddamn mind), c) quicker back and forth where you don't need dialogue tags or stage directions bc characteristic voices will make it clear who is speaking. -

I read everything aloud as I post. This is how I proofread. Reading aloud helps me find spelling errors/sentence errors, but it also means that I have to speak all my dialogue aloud to my own wall like a crazy person. If I'm speaking it aloud in a different way, like the phrasing changes subconsciously to what's more natural in my mouth, I will often edit the dialogue to reflect that. I speak it, to see how it is spoken. -

Second to the above point, if you have a character who's voice you struggle with, listen/watch clips of their voice. I do not think I can write Lae'zel (or Gale tbh, and I'm now writing a whole fic from his pov so I clearly hate myself). I watch back clips of them all the time, and then I go to my dialogue, and see if I can hear it in their voice. If I can, I keep it. -

...Be brave enough to tell jokes. I genuinely can't tell you how much I don't think I'm funny. Every joke I write in my fic, I have no idea if anyone else will enjoy it, or if it only makes me laugh. But I put it in there, for me. I'm lucky, bc now some people tell me they found a joke amusing, and I'll know it landed with someone else other than me. But you tell jokes with your friends, presumably, and you're playful with them. So allow your characters to joke with each other, even if you're scared that no one else will 'get it'. If no one else finds it funny, at least the characters are having fun! -

Anyway, those are my main 'tips', I don't know if any of them are helpful!!

My other one main piece of advice is... read. Seriously. Even if the media you want to write for isn't a literary novel, read other people's writing, and I do mean both fic and published books, because published books (if they're good) have an editor. I read a lot of books/webtoons/manga before I ever wrote a fic... like for 12 years or something. I was a big reader, and reading good writing is useful - it's inspiring, it's also just technically helpful. These writing tips might be useless, because lot of what I've done in my own writing I've learned through osmosis - just by reading a fuck tonne of books, good and bad. I'm not saying you have to read 60 books a year or w/e, but read like, a few good books!

(also, just write a bunch. I am only becoming a 'read' fic author on my 11th project??? basically??? so I've had a lot of practice at this point, and grown in confidence. The more things you finish, the more ambitious you get. I couldn't have conceived of Pieces when I was writing my first fanfic, bc I thought plot was my main weakness... now I'm writing an almost entirely original premise and that's bc I've learned a lot since I started writing!)

[iaus]

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ANYTHING YOU LIKE I WOULD LOVE THE DIRECTOR’S COMMENTARY ON ANYTHING!!!

oh. i know. i know. okay. this is gonna be kinda wild because i'm gonna reference a few of my other fics for this but i feel like it's important for how the scene got written but.

epilogue. my beloved.... chapter 9. let's get some magic going.

i feel like i mentioned in a reply to a comment once that the scene where jace steals the spell in chapter 9 that how i wrote the magic was greatly influenced how i wrote magic in my darkest dungeon fic (thinking about this because i reread the fic that inspired this). i remember, later, i was like. i forgot to mention how gale bg3 affected this whole thing. so bear with me. i'll bold the part where i start actually going over the scene if you wanna skip this talk <3

so to preface this scene. i put a lot of physicality into writing magic. this is partly influenced by damian (the flagellant) from darkest dungeon. damian is a fanatic of the light (the catholic church. it's literally the catholic church.) and uses his body and faith to cast magic. his entire kit is built around using blood, taking wounds from other characters, and sacrificing himself. if you have a flagellant die in darkest dungeon he will stun enemies so your other characters have an advantage against an enemy.

so, for context. that's where a lot of my gnarly magic descriptions come from. that's where the idea for my spell thief mechanic came from because, while i know it's hard to do in dnd, i think magic literally taking a toll on your body is so cool. especially if, like jace, you're pushing yourself to the limit.

but in addition to that gale bg3 is my favorite romance. and, uh, well, spoilers for gale if you haven't played the game, he literally has a piece of the karsite weave in his chest and has to consume magic items so he literally doesn't detonate. the game doesn't really play into this as much as i like. i think he should look haggard and unhealthy or at least have dialogue options about it because there are some dialogues that imply this takes a huge toll on his body. which i mean. makes sense. the karsite weave feeds on magic. there's also further gale meta where i think he's actually a sorcerer who was trained as a wizard BUT I DIGRESS. i wanted to mention this before i got to the scene because it really effected my approach to writing jace.

i love sorcerer as a class. i think it's so interesting and there's so many different ways to play it. we're. not going to get to my jace frustrations though.

BUT. now we can get to the scene from chapter 9 of epilogue.

so, we're now learning more about this power that jace has.

we've only had it kind of alluded to before now. we had the flashback of the bleeding tiefling in chapter 6 and now we're seeing the power in action. the thing that got jace blacklisted from adventuring. (or well. what he says is the big thing. not the. y'know. assaulting a party member with modify memory and then leaving him with brain damage.)

we're gonna start here:

It has been years since he’s attempted this—much less when he’s been pinioned by a god. Porter would have never. Even on his worst days.

i know i structured epilogue to be purposefully vague and a little confusing about what's going on with jace but i want to start with this line because it really shows how much he resents ankarna. and honestly? he is resenting her for something that his grief is causing. grief is such a powerful thing and jace refuses to look directly at his grief. ankarna has never "pinioned" him. she truly was offering jace a gift. she wanted him to have a full, whole life where he could make his own choices without porter's influence. she did not take his magic.

jace is stifling his own magic with the immense weight of the grief and longing he cannot imagine. but, of course, he is going to make this into an ankarna vs porter thing. ankarna will never be able to win as a goddess here. he's going to pick porter every time because jace truly, wholeheartedly believes porter is the only one there for him.

even if he is unsure if porter loves him.

He can feel the strange hollowness—that hungry, infinite well that’s sunk deeper and deeper into him since he reanimated—, but beyond that is the cold font of magic he’s always drawn upon. Familiar. He closes his eyes, focuses upon it, can see the shimmering, pale gold of it gathering just beneath the surface of his skin.

the idea of innate magic is so interesting to me. here's this thing that jace has always known, always connected to. it's familiar. even if he sees it as cruel (and... that also begs the thought. is his magic actually cruel or is it adapting to what jace feels it is). and it's there. it's still there, just hidden. by his grief.

Divinity has always been his favorite—he’s always known the taste and feel of it, intimately.

divine magic is all he knows. his own.... porter's own sort of divinity.... even if porter's divinity... is not all his... epilogue jace is a divine sorcerer... interesting that he's ascending someone. interesting that... maybe the divinity porter has isn't... ankarna's. things to think about for this universe....

NOW. we get into the actual magical casting. my intent with this scene was to really hammer home how much effort this takes jace. at this point he is still sick with resurrection sickness. mechanically resurrection sickness is honestly not that big of a deal. you're worse off with levels of exhaustion (which, honestly, i've been more looking at those rather than the disadvantages of raise dead.)

but we also have our first glimpse of jace earnestly casting something that isn't a cantrip and it's taxing.

He slits his eyes open, to watch the curl of his own fingers, the flex of veins and tendons beneath his skin. Evocation magic has always felt particularly uncreative to him. This feels no less brutish, but even he can make evocation magic something more. The weave around him bends—groaning like an old, cantankerous creature, but slowly it gives way. The air parts, ripping open at the seams. Crackling energy heats the air with a whistling whine. Jace can feel sweat soaking through his undershirt, can feel the way his body shrieks in protest, a new fever already beginning to burn through his body, he smells blood—can feel it dripping down his mouth from his nostrils. He continues, drawing strands of magic from beyond.

you also get to see some of jace's biases. he thinks evocation magic is brutish-- ironic considering what jace is doing right now could be considered brutish. but then he turns it. he says even he can make this brutish thing this brutish kind of magic more. he's better than other casters.

and he immediately feels the effects. he is sweating and bleeding. also, i see jace as a very electric caster. i know we all have our opinions on his preferred damage types but i see him loving electricity and psychic. especially epilogue jace who is... such a strange beast.

and now we get into my favorite part of this chapter. i really liked doing shorter lines for the end of this. jace is on the verge of passing out. he's expended himself for a chromatic orb. a first level spell. as a level 20 caster that's... quite a way to be brought low.

It always hurts the worst before it works. (His God taught him that, intimately.)

epilogue has jace growing-- becoming someone who takes. he doesn't have porter with him. so he'll take porter's teachings to heart to fill that hole.

With a screeching whine and a loud pop, a sizzling ball of vibrant lightning curls in his hand. A weight lifts from his chest. The crushing well of him feels less empty. Blood trickles down his nose, over the triumphant curl of his lips. He can almost hear Porter’s voice in his ear, warm and heavy with fondness, That’s it, sweetheart—there’s my Saint Stardiamond. Jace laughs. See, he thinks as he cradles the stolen, volatile spell in the cup of his shaking, bleeding hand, I could never be yours. And then he collapses.

and the culmination of his efforts.

jace steals a spell. something he should never have. his grief, for the first time, breaks. he pays for it with blood and sweat but he's rewarded. he gets his magic. he can picture porter's pride.

and then. he decides. that's not enough.

he uses this to show ankarna: you'll never be enough for me.

i'd argue this is the moment in epilogue when jace takes his final turn for the worst. he's going to take what he needs. by any means necessary.

[bettsfic]

I feel like you've answered something similar ao sorry if it's repetitive!! Do you usually work with, like "bolt from the blue" ideas, or do you sit and plan something out? As in, thinking up a story to write and laying the groundwork etc.?

I ask because I usually have a sudden idea, more or less formed, but I always run out of steam with them. I'm passionate about them but they're easily "damaged" in a sense, and fall apart eventually. I haven't had an idea like that in maybe 4 years. Recently I sat down and actively tried to come up with a story from scratch. It feels less passionate and exciting and I hope that stuff comes later once the basics are mapped.

I was wondering what your personal experience with starting out is, and your perspective! Ty 💗

well i used to be able to have an okay idea, sit down and write it, and be decently happy with it. but as i've improved as a writer, it goes more like: find a vibe, write a meandering 10k to figure out the story the vibe conjures, rewrite it knowing that story, and go from there. the benefit of this is that i end up being very happy with the final product rather than decently happy, and it also makes revision easier because it becomes easier to see a piece's true potential. the drawback is that everything takes a million years to write.

here's an example:

the other night i couldn't sleep. i ended up staring at my ceiling for 4 hours thinking about a one piece fic idea. it came to me fully formed, like i knew how it started, how it ended, and more or less how to get there. it would be a one-shot, maybe 8k. was it a good idea? no. did i start writing it anyway? yes.

i also had another idea, far more amorphous. in fact all i had was a single image and i was trying to figure out what story could be told around that image (this is how i finished my novel recently too, except the image i had in my head didn't end up making it to the final draft at all, but that's how it be sometimes). no matter how hard i thought about it, no story developed. so i started writing it anyway just to see what would happen. i was seeking just a general feeling of a character's intense yearning and self-loathing; i was curious about how he would develop in this specific AU.

i have about 6k of both fics. the first one did what you mentioned: i got to a certain point and lost steam. if i put my mind to it, i could barrel through and finish it, but i'll probably never be super happy with it. in other words, it'll get the job done, but the job itself is not very good.

the second one is just a pile of random thoughts completely unstructured, but it has legs. the former can't be revised to be better than what it is, because i set the ambition too early. the second one can become something really cool, but that requires me to follow it until an actual story arises, and when that happens i'll have to go back and rewrite it knowing what the story is. it'll take longer, but it'll be better for it. it might be a small thing that sparks a much larger thing down the line.

there's nothing wrong with the first method. i wrote and published a number of stories by knowing what the thing was before i began writing. but the second method is more fulfilling and keeps me engaged for longer.

so i guess what i'm saying is, maybe know less about what you want to write. let yourself draft to explore. don't be afraid of rewriting. pay attention to the paragraphs and sentences you really like, because even if they don't make sense now, you'll find a place for them later.

if you want more concrete advice, i talk more about drafting and setting ambition in an issue of my newsletter.