#me: i dont have seasonalaffectivedisorder i love winter actually i hate summer
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#me: i dont have seasonalaffectivedisorder i love winter actually i hate summer#me: has spent every day this week crying over stupid shit#how are you all coping. usually i am okay. and i work best at night time so i always feel a little productive in winter#but its so so bad this time around. that or im just worse in general that could be q thing.#confession is i havent gotten out of bed all day. i took my dog outside thats all ive done.#i keep trying to draw but i just like CANT and its making me cry more. i am really overwhelmed.#i keep thinking oh maybe ill try reading (has been unable to get the stupid book thats just on the otber side of the room)#its so fucking ridiculous. i havent even been on my phone thst much and i havent been sleeping ive just been dissociating i guess?#other than my attempts to draw and play ac but my switch died lol. whatever#i honestly have no idea what ive been doing this entire time.#im gonna take melatonin and go to bed early or something i guess#desperately i wwnt to draw and being unable to is hurting like actually. tgis is so dumb.#and like every attempt I've made and started to be successful somebody has got to bother me and fuck it up#or give me news i dont wanna hear. dump stuff on me. etc. literally so exhausted. always and constantly
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