#me about the whole 'brainwashing' thing: have you considered that the bullets are willing to die for chisaki's cause bc they agree w him

[kainagant]

what makes me kinda eyebrow raise about how overhaul is clearly portrayed as a one dimensional villain is the way that when his followers respect and care for him because he saved them when they were at their lowest points it's compared to "brainwashing", but when the league respect and care for shigaraki its described as "being a hero for the villains". like okay lmao. i see the double standard.

[baeklooming-day]

Fleeting 3 | Baekhyun

Summary: You lead a double life. For everyone else, you are the pretty girl with a great sense of fashion who works at Sephora. But it isn't your only job. For the other one you require only two things: the collection of weapons you keep in your closet - and zero emotions.

ft. Luhan

Genre: assassin!au, mafia!au, street racer!au, fluff, angst

Word count: 2.4k

A/N: little disclaimer: just to clarify the ages of the characters in the story, y/n is supposed to be around 19, Baekhyun is one year older than her, following with Luhan who is two years older. I know, I made a playlist for Fleeting when I was bored, however I would recommend to play Tian Di by Kris while reading this chapter. <3 I hope you enjoy!

The three of you exchanged looks before Baekhyun spoke up again.

”It started three years ago.” He looked at you briefly. Three years ago. That was the time where you first moved to this town and met him for the first time. ”I was seventeen when I got my driving license, so were my friends. In the evenings, or even at night if we were feeling like it, we liked to drive all the way over to the old football field and see who was the fastest from us all. The whole place seemed a little spooky, so there really was nobody, ever. We never had to worry about anybody discovering what we were doing. It was nothing back then, just fooling around with our cars. Until one time, when we saw someone watching. Or, more like were just talking by our cars after we finished and suddenly heard clapping from behind. We thought we were done there, but like we later learned, it was one of the people with quite a position in the illegal leagues.” Baekhyun brushed his black bangs off before continuing. ”He said he had been watching us for a couple of days now. Which only proves how careless we were, because we never noticed him before. Anyway, he said he was impressed with what he witnessed, casually asking us if we wanted to make some money. And we, careless students, without considering anything agreed just like that. And this is how I ended up going to my first actual race.” He straightened, letting out a deep breath. ”Without getting into details, because I don’t think this is the most important thing, I started racing regularly from that day. In these three years, I also managed to build quite a reputation. And in these three years, I lost only once.” He glanced at Luhan. ”Because of that, I was asked to join in the big race in Shanghai. And this is where Tao and Kris appear on the scene. I had frankly no clue that they were associated with mafia, because I was always told that they are not very likely to participate in events like this. Anyway, the first prize for winning that race was the Rolls Royce. I won. I thought everything was great and perfect, that I can just take the car and drive off into the sunset... Nuh-uh. Nothing more delusional. Like I later discovered, Tao and Kris had their eyes set on that car and couldn’t accept it that their men lost to a practical kid. I was lucky enough to disappear from there without them eventually sending a few bullets after me, but like we saw it today, in the end they came after me. And actually there is nothing more to it. That’s the whole story.” He finished.

There was a little pause before Luhan’s amused voice filled the air. ”I told you. Kris went crazy.” He shook his head, causing his brown hair to bounce. ”And it’s obvious that he somehow brainwashed Tao too. He wasn’t always that thirsty for blood like he apparently is now.”

You just sat there, trying to process all that information that’s been just spilled on you. Recalling the events which took place just a few hours ago in Cloud 9, you felt a little dizzy all over again. You would never think that there will be a day, where Tao points his gun at you. You would never think that it was Kris who sent him to eliminate you. And, you would surely never think that he wanted to do the same to Luhan as well.

Because once, you were all like a family.

”I-” You tried to say something, anything, but you could’t help feeling overwhelmed. Maybe you weren’t that good as you liked to give yourself a credit for. You didn’t care about people from outside, but if the matter had something to do with the ’family’, you weren’t able to neglect it.

You felt Luhan’s hand touching your shoulder, a gesture of comfort. ”I know what you’re thinking right now.” He put his lips in a tight line. ”Neither of us can go back to Shanghai. Not now. Not in the future. And very honestly saying, I don’t know when we will be able to.”

Baekhyun was still shifting on the floor where he was sitting. ”Wait, what do you mean by ’going back to Shanghai?’”

You looked at him with a blank expression on your face.

”This is just another story from the past.” You still couldn’t say what might be going on in his head right now. You already knew that he was beyond disappointed in you, but was he really willing to hear about your mess of a childhood?

Before Baekhyun could answer, Luhan was faster. ”Look, this is something very far from a healthy childhood story, so I would consider it if you really wanna hear it.” He huffed. ”I can imagine, you already think that we’re beyond sick, but I don’t guarantee that you won’t think even worse of us after hearing how we both ended up in... Yeah, you know.”

Baekhyun was looking once to Luhan, once to you. When he spoke again, there was something audible in his voice. Something you couldn’t name. ”Tell me.”

You gave Luhan a look, encouraging him to start talking. You weren’t really feeling like saying anything at all at that moment.

”Very well then.” He began. ”From the looks you gave me, yeah I saw it, I could tell that you’re dying to know what exactly is our relationship.” He pointed at you before going on. ”Looking way back, about 12 years ago. I think I told you that me and Y/N have known each other since we were eight. Precisely, she was eight, I was ten at that time. You need to know that we both originally come from families who were a little more than well off. It was early spring, we ended up being on the same ship, attending a fancy event with our families. It was the first time we met, being small children we instantly became friends. So far, everything was very normal. Until.” Luhan paused for a brief moment. You felt that. Recalling those events still made both your damaged hearts to ache. But life goes on. ”I don’t want it to become boring, all you need to know is that we ended up being caught in a feud between two different mafias. We still don’t really know why they were there, I doubt we will ever know. They were ruthless, they didn’t care at all about the innocent people on the ship. All I remember is that at some point they started shooting and eventually put the whole ship on fire. In the conclusion, me and Y/N saw lots, lots of people dying around us.” Luhan paused again. ”We saw how they pointed their guns at our parents. We sa-”

”Luhan.” You squeezed his hand. ”Don’t.”

He let out a breath. ”Yeah, basically. I already mentioned Xianmiao before. Well, his full name was Wen Xian Miao. He was the boss of one of the mafias who were there, a very powerful and influential one. I don’t know why he did that to be honest, but he picked us up from that ship and took us with him to Shanghai. Just to clarify a few things, his men weren’t the ones who killed-”

You nudged him.

”His men weren’t the ones. Eventually, he became like a father to us. He raised us. Cared for us. Gave us a home. During that time, me and Y/N became practical siblings, and it didn’t change until this day.” It was Luhan’s turn to nudge you lightly.

Yeah. The bond you built throughout the years was too strong to get broken, and even though you and Luhan didn’t share the same blood, you were always calling each other ’brother’ and ’sister’. Even though you weren’t biological, you were sure you had a much firmer bond than many of the regular biological siblings out there.

Baekhyun was listening carefully to everything what Luhan’s been telling. You observed his reactions, trying to read him. You wanted to ask him if he hated you. But you couldn’t just casually throw this question at him right now.

Luhan kept going. ”Don’t get the wrong idea, neither of us was forced into this dark business. I mean, ’tasks’-” He shook his hair off his eyes. ”It was our own choice. When Y/N was twelve and I was fourteen, I started training. At the beginning Xian wasn’t too impressed by my wish, but eventually he let me and he got me the best training I could receive. At that time Y/N wasn’t allowed anywhere near that stuff, seeing that she was still too young. Well, I mean, I was obviously too young as well but fourteen was the more acceptable age in Xian’s opinion. Two years later Y/N started training too.” Luhan looked at you, a visible question in his eyes.

That was the part you should tell by yourself.

”That’s right.” You began. ”After I was allowed to, me and Luhan were trained side by side. It wasn’t anything very particular at the beginning, we learned how to deal with all kinds of weapons and how to fight, just in case. We were prepared really well. When the time came, Lu was the first one of us two to actually take somebody down.” You paused. You remembered it very well. ”It was harder than anyone can imagine for two kids to be growing up around gunshots and cruelty.” You paused again, searching for the right words. If only the right words for such actions existed.

”If you think that it messed up our heads a little, then you’re right.” Luhan looked over to Baekhyun. ”It did. But living in a world like this, you become accustomed to it after a while. You could say we were... really unfortunate.” He intertwined his both hands, looking down. He always acted tough, but you knew him way too well to not see that it was breaking him inside just like it was breaking you.

When he didn’t say anything more, you continued talking. ”Later, when I was sixteen I got my first task. I was supposed to eliminate a traitor. A traitor, who had been selling our informations to the mafia from the other side of Shanghai. It was like a war between two concurrent families. I was chosen to complete it because I was already skilled more than good enough and being a fragile sixteen-year-old girl I wouldn’t be suspected of a crime like this. Plus, nobody knew who I was over there.” You let out a breath, looking anywhere but at Baekhyun’s face. ”I completed the task successfully. But after I did, I had to disappear for a while. And this is the point which leads us to where we are now.” You looked up. ”Xian’s cousin had an undercover corporation here. A corporation which connected... Uhm. Which connected the mafia, the assassins, the dealers, you name it. It was the connection between everyone in the family. His cousin had a son, Yixing. After he unfortunately passed away, it was Yixing who took the leadership from there. To assure I was safe, I was sent here. And that resulted in meeting you, Baekhyun. As well as meeting Sujin.” You finally looked at him. ”I was supposed to stay here as long as the things back in Shanghai were sorted out. I wasn’t allowed to contact anyone back home, including Luhan. We couldn’t risk anyone to track me down. In these three years I had no idea what was going on in China. All I still remember was that the hell broke loose after I took down that delinquent. I even thought that they could be all dead there. I thought that Luhan could have ended up like this.” You felt your eyes welling up just at the single thought of it.

Luhan squeezed your hand firmly. ”Before you flew away, I promised you. Siblings find each other again. No matter what and no matter how long. And look at us now. We are both here.”

You quickly wiped off the tear that was about to fall down.

Baekhyun, sitting still, looked at both you and Luhan seeming to not find any words to say. You could easily imagine that he expected many things, but not this.

Finally he spoke up. ”I’m... I’m very sorry for all you had to go through, nonetheless. I can’t compare it to my own situation.” He stood up, putting his hands in the pockets of his black jeans. His expression was unreadable.

You blankly stared into space. At that point you could forget the things with Baekhyun to go back to ’normal’ ever again.

”Well, I-” Baekhyun spoke again. ”I think I need to be alone for a while, so excuse me.” He turned around on his heel and walked out of the room.

”Baek-” You wanted to stop him, but you got interrupted by Luhan.

”Y/N, don’t. Let him.”

You let out a deep, shaky breath.

Everything was even a bigger mess now. Was it even possible?

Your eyes dashed back to Luhan.

”Lulu.” You said. ”Do you think he hates me now?”

”I don’t know if he hates you, but he clearly doesn’t like me.”

You lightly hit him in the shoulder. ”What are we going to do now?”

Luhan looked at you. ”I think I have a plan. First, I would say we find Yixing. Then we will see.” He paused, examining your face. ”You changed a lot, little sister.”

You smiled softly. ”So did you. You grew up so much.”

You just sat there, next to Luhan. You didn’t see him for about three years. You had so much to tell him.

He seemed to be thinking the same, because he turned to have a proper look at you in the exact same time as you did. ”So, ignoring the fact that our lives are very literally in danger right now, how have you been this entire time?”

That, that sibling talk was what you majorly missed in your life despite everything.

After all, Luhan was the one who would never judge you for anything you did.

”Where do I begin...”

A/N: I purposely concentrated this chapter on Luhan, because I wanted to make clear his sibling relation to y/n. I promise you more and more Baekhyun in the future chapters! thank you for reading and tell me what you thought of this one! and as always feel free to reblog if you want to! <3

[nellie-elizabeth]

Doctor Who: The Lie of the Land (10x08)

Ah. So we've arrived. The first truly disappointing episode of the season. Let's just get started with this.

Cons:

The Monks have taken over the world and rewritten history so that all humans will think that the Monks have been there all along, and that humanity needs to obey their benevolent overlords. Most people buy into the lie. Bill is resisting, hoping that the Doctor will be able to return and save the world. Nardole shows up, and he and Bill sneak in to find the Doctor, who is apparently working with the Monks and broadcasting messages about their benevolence. Bill shows up, and is horrified to find that the Doctor really does seem to be working with the Monks, and is not planning something to free the world. In despair, Bill gets a gun from one of the guards and shoots the Doctor. The Doctor then starts to regenerate, but it turns out the whole thing was a trick so that the Doctor could be absolutely sure that Bill wasn't under the Monks' influence. From this point on, we pivot and the rest of the episode features the Doctor, Bill, and Nardole working together to rid the world of the Monks.

Before I go in to the rest of the episode, there is just so much stupid shit to deal with in this first section. I was actually enjoying the story up until the point where we find the Doctor and it turns out that he's "really working for the Monks." There were a couple of different directions this could have gone. The stupid, boring, predictable direction is that the Doctor is faking and has a master plan. Ding ding ding! That's what they went with. Other possibilities include: the Doctor is brainwashed, or the Doctor is biding his time and doesn't really have a plan, and is pissed off that Nardole and Bill have shown up and put themselves in danger. Or the Monks had some way to replicate the Doctor and fake those TV broadcasts. But no. They went for the predictable outcome.

Even more egregious than that is the way this whole moment is played off as a joke. Bill actually takes up a gun and shoots the Doctor, okay? I mean, yeah, the bullets were switched out with blanks, but Bill certainly didn't know that! I'm not convinced that the moment was totally earned in the first place. Would Bill really have gone so quickly to the nuclear option like that? Regardless, the episode should have treated this moment with a lot more gravitas. I'm okay with the Doctor tricking Bill in order to test her true allegiances. Sure, it's a little tired and boring, but whatever. But in that case, the Doctor should have felt devastated at the necessity of the deceit. It should have been really hard for him and Nardole to put Bill through such trauma. Instead, the Doctor laughs about it. Bill spends two seconds getting angry at Nardole for the act. And then we breeze right on by. What the heck. I'm really annoyed about this.

Moving on from that point, the Doctor needs help to figure out how the Monks control the world. So, he goes to Missy, who he figures might be able to help. She does indeed have an answer. Apparently the Monks use a telepathic link to control the citizens of the worlds they are conquering. They do this through the person who first gave consent to the dominion. This means, basically, that Bill has to die in order to break the Monk's control. The Doctor is obviously not okay with that option. What bothers me about Missy's involvement here is that there are no real consequences to getting her help. We learn that she is making a sincere effort to be a good person, which, okay... but she gives them answers and then there's really nothing else. I didn't want to be disappointed in the secret of the vault. I even had high hopes when Missy was revealed. But as of right now, I'm feeling kind of... meh about her.

The buildup to the Monks taking over the world was so good, that it just makes this episode all the more disappointing in contrast. They take over everybody's mind to gain dominion over this world, but we never learn why they would want to do such a thing. At some point we learn that there are only a dozen or so of the Monks, and so their dominion really is entirely dependent on their control over the people's minds. Even so, it's very disappointing that the Monks turn and run the moment everybody wakes up to the truth. They ended up being extremely weak villains, which is so disappointing after all that buildup!

In the end, the day is saved because Bill basically plugs herself in to the machinery that is being used to control everybody, and she projects images of her mother, as she imagines her. This image is so pure and full of love or something that the Monks can't touch it. I don't necessarily have a problem with this, as cheesy as it is. What I do have a problem with is the Doctor over-explaining what's happening during the climax. I couldn't help but think that there was probably a more clever, visual way that Bill's strength could have been depicted. Instead, we get the Doctor explaining it to us with a big speech about how brilliant Bill is - and then he pivots and says something about how he saved the world by giving Bill those pictures of her mother. Yikes. Apparently Bill is fine once it's all over, which is something that's never explained. All those stakes being set up about Bill needing to die, and then... I guess not! She's totally fine.

I'm going to talk in the "Pros" section about Bill and the Doctor's relationship, and how much I like it. There was one moment that I disliked a lot, though. After the Monks are dispelled, the Doctor and Bill are talking about how humans are doomed to never learn from their mistakes. The Doctor says that this is an annoying thing about humanity, and Bill asks why he puts up with them. The Doctor says that every once in a while, there's someone like Bill, and "that's why I put up with the rest of them." NOPE. Sorry but NOPE. I'm okay with the Doctor being a bit of a grump, but the Doctor loves the human race. That's like one of his main things. I think I've just identified another reason why Moffat's version of the Doctor bugs me so much - he really does seem to think he's better than humanity, and he has no problem with that belief. Ugh. So frustrating.

Finally, before I stop my complaining, I want to say that this episode suffered from a pacing issue. We've had two episodes building the Monks up, and then they take over for just one episode and are quite easily expelled. It's a bit of a letdown, to say the least. We see bits at the beginning where a woman is being taken out of her home for resisting the Monks, we see the effect of a whole world believing the lie... but that's it. If we'd had a whole half of an episode to spend with Bill while she lives in fear and despair, and then maybe ended part one with the Doctor's first appearance, I feel like the stakes would have been better established.

Pros:

As you can gather from that extensive complaining session, I was really not a fan of this one. That's not to say that it was devoid of good ideas or moments.

As I alluded to, I actually liked the start of the episode. Bill was so discouraged and confused, the world seemed so desperately lost... and the relief I felt when Nardole showed up was palpable. The buildup was actually very good, it's just the payoff the failed.

Despite being a bit disappointed in Missy's role, I continue to think Michelle Gomez is amazing in the role. She really milks every second she's on screen. I liked her speech to the Doctor about how she's making an honest effort to be good, but she's never going to be sentimental like he is. She wants to save the world from the Monks, but she doesn't mind that Bill will need to die for that to happen. Does that make her evil? There's an interesting tension to be explored here. Missy doesn't have a great deal of empathy, but that doesn't make her irredeemable.

Also, like I said, I still do enjoy the relationship between Bill and the Doctor. Bill understands, pragmatically, that her death will save the world, but the Doctor is not willing to consider it. The Doctor says that he wants Bill by his side because it's the safest place in the world for her to be, and Bill remarks that this is how the Monks' plan will succeed. They have this exchange, which I found perfectly heartbreaking:

Bill: "I don't want our last conversation to be this."

Doctor: "I don't want this to be our last conversation."

The Doctor's desperation to save Bill's life was very touching. In some ways it still feels like we're in the introduction episodes for Bill, but in other ways I feel like the deep love between the Doctor and Bill has a strong foundation already. This episode only furthered that impression.

Ultimately, as I expressed at length in the "Cons" section, I was disappointed with this episode. How much cooler would it have been if we'd had to see Bill and Nardole struggle to save the world without the Doctor's help? Or even with the Doctor's active resistance? There were so many times when I could think of a cooler or more nuanced direction for the episode to go, but we didn't get any of that. I hope we get back to the good episodes next week. I suppose there had to be at least one complete flop in the mix the season.

5/10

[imaginesteverogerss]

How about one where Steve gets hurt and they try to use medicine to put him to sleep or numb the pain only for it not to work and for them have to operate or get a bullet put as he awake and the avengers have to hold him down when it's happening resulting in them seeing Steve has been holding back strength wise when he tosses them like salad

Heart pounding,Tony almost broke his own speed record. Would have, if not for allthe additional weight. Why is Steve so heavy? What did this guy eat?Tony had just come to a truce with Steve over the brainwashed Bucky.There were only a few people Tony considered real friends. He wasn’tabout to lose Steve so soon after getting him back.

Giving a softbreathy moan, Steve tried to shift. Tightening his grip, Tony willedhis suit to fly faster. When they found Steve, there was so muchblood and his skin was so pale. After stopping the bleeding, Tonyhefted Steve and shot into the sky. He flew them straight into themedlab, where Dr. Cho and her staff were waiting.

Most of the teamwas following in a quinjet. Minus Thor, who flew ahead. And Bucky,who Tony wasn’t comfortable fighting alongside yet. Barnes wassafely hidden away, living in a comfortable apartment in Brooklyn.

Gently lyingSteve on a gurney, Tony watched a cute nurse approach with an IV anda vial. Thor waited nearby. Once the IV was in, Tony’s view wasblocked by the swarming medical personnel as they began to wheelSteve away towards surgery. At first, Tony thought a nurse tripped,until he saw another nurse stumble away, then a third. Moving incloser, Tony found Steve pushing them back. He looked disoriented.His pupils were huge as he fought the staff. The IV dangled loose.

Glancing over,Tony saw Thor also moving closer. Holding his hands out, Thor triedto calm Steve. “Easy Brother. You need to lie back and allow DoctorCho a chance to heal your wounds.”

Steve was gulpinggreat puffs of air and trying to sit up. Tony put his hand on Steve’sshoulder and added, “Calm down big guy. You’re frightening themedical staff.”

Reaching up,Steve grabbed Tony’s arm and crushed the armored gauntlet. Thor’squick reflexes saved Tony from a broken arm. A shower of sparksfountained from the suit as Steve’s hand crumpled the metal like itwas paper. Next, Tony watched Steve grip the bed, and bend aside therailing along with the bedding. He seemed to give it no more effortthan pushing away the blanket.

Thor had hishands full trying to get Steve back into the bed. The staff hidaround a corner. Bravely, Doctor Cho moved closer, ready to giveSteve a different medicine. Holding Steve’s arm down, Thor tried tohelp Doctor Cho sedate Steve. Instead, he found himself hurledthrough a doorway, crushing a wooden desk. A nearby shelving unittipped, dumping books and photos on top of him. Doctor Cho narrowlymissed being hit by Thor as he flew past. Smartly, when Stevesnatched Thor’s arm, she flung herself to the ground.

Bucky sighed,“Steve. Is that any way to treat a lady?” he said walking up andhelping Doctor Cho off the floor.

Natasha hoveredin a doorway. “I thought he should be here.” She said to Tony’sraised eyebrow.

Steve slumped abit, “Buck?” he slurred.

“Man, you’rea mess. Looks like they’ve got you drugged up.” Bucky said toSteve and glanced over to where the nurses were tugging Thor from thedebris. “Okay, Stark. Looks like it’s you and me.” He saidgiving Steve a gentle push to get him to lie back. “Get his otherside.”

“What?” Tonysaid looking down at his now gloveless hand.

“Use your otherhand.”

“What aboutwhen he crushes that side?”

“Come on Steve.You gonna smash up Stark’s fancy suit?”

“No.” Steveslurred “Sorry Tony. I didn’t mean… I wasn’t trying… Idon’t know what I was thinking.” Steve sagged back into the bed,allowing himself to be held down by Bucky’s palm over his chest.Tony noted that he wasn’t even pressing down.

“Um.” DoctorCho cleared her throat, “Is he calm now?”

In the doorwaystood Thor picking bits of wood and glass from his hair. Four nursespeeked around his shoulders.

“Stark, you gothis other side?” Bucky asked, taking a firm hold of Steve’swrist.

Tony got intoposition. He stayed there for a minute, possibly two. Then, thescalpel came out and Tony woke up after the procedure was over.

Steve slept in anearby bed. His color was still a bit off, but he looked good. Crispwhite bandages covered Steve’s middle, and a wide square on histemple. Bucky sat nearby in a chair reading a paperback.

Rubbing at a sorerib, Tony said “They have this thing called a tablet. It lets youhold a whole library in the palm of your hand.”

Shrugging Buckysaid “Steve put his finger through it an hour ago, when I showedhim a cat video.”

“A Cat video?”

“It was funny.”

[rose-of-pollux]

The Deadly Admirer Affair (MFU fic), part 10/10

Title: The Deadly Admirer Affair Rating: PG13 (for action/danger) Chapter summary: Things come to a head as Napoleon has to make a quick decision. Notes: And, it’s done!  Thanks to everyone who read and supported this!

If you prefer reading on FFN, you can read it here: https://www.fanfiction.net/s/12338876/10/ If you prefer reading on AO3, you can read it here: http://archiveofourown.org/works/9472766/chapters/23174454

                                                Act X: Endgame

“Napoleon, please leave…” Illya pleaded again.  “The last thing I would want… is for you to get hurt somehow.”

“Funnily enough, the last thing I want is for you to get hurt, too,” Napoleon said.  He looked out the window once more, and then abandoned this idea.  It was true that he wouldn’t get very far, especially if he carried Illya with him.  He sighed and now turned to face the door of the room.

Trying to get the jump on Mills as he entered was one option, but one that wouldn’t work if Mills entered firing at anything that moved.  It didn’t matter that Mills was somehow obsessed with “saving” Napoleon from Illya—if something happened and Napoleon did get hurt or killed in the ensuing confrontation, Mills would somehow blame Illya for it and draw out his suffering all the more.

“Napoleon…”

“We need backup, but it’ll take them ten minutes to get here…” Napoleon said.  “How can we stall him for ten minutes…?”

Illya didn’t respond to this; while his rational side was ready to admit that he was in no condition to defend himself, his rarely-seen sentimental side knew that if there was anyone who could find a way out of this predicament, it would be Napoleon.  His partner would not let him die without a fight.

“Tell me one thing,” Napoleon was saying.  “You said that Mills would taunt you during his attacks?”

“Da…” Illya murmured.  “His ego is quite large.  But I fail to see what that has to do with anything.”

But Napoleon was looking as though the proverbial light bulb just had gone off over his head.

“Illya, I’ve got an idea.  I promise you, you’ll be safe through the whole thing, so just go along with me on this.”

“What about you…?”

“Well…” Napoleon sighed.  “There’s quite a bit of risk to me, but I’m willing to take that chance if it means stopping Mills.”

“Nyet…!”

“Aside from the fact that I am more than willing to pull rank on you right now, there isn’t really anything you can do to stop me, is there?”

Illya, though very much against the idea, was too exhausted to protest as Napoleon now began to set things into motion; even with his own condition as it was, the Russian could only think of his partner, and hope that Napoleon’s attempts to protect him from Mills wouldn’t end with him getting hurt in some way.

                                       ****************************************

Once the outer door had been breached, a quick ransacking of the other rooms in the apartment had been audible from the bedroom until the bedroom door was soon kicked open.  The lone figure in the bed shuddered, facing out the window, not daring to look back.  The figure was tightly wrapped in a blanket, with part of the blanket raised up as a hood to keep out the autumn chill.

But it wasn’t the chill that the figure in the bed was trembling about.  His breath nearly stilled as the intruder approached him from behind.

“Turn around and face me,” Mills ordered.  He wasn’t bothering to disguise his voice now that the jig was up.

“N-nyet,” the figure in the bed stammered, quietly.

He flinched as Mills kicked him in response.

“Speak English!” Mills yelled at him.

The prone figure didn’t respond; he continued to lie there, not daring to move as he heard Mills search the room, and then the bathroom and closet.  There didn’t appear to be anyone else in the room.

“Glad to see Solo finally ditched you,” Mills said. “Did he finally break free from your brainwashing?  Or did you realize that it was finally time for you to die, and you didn’t want Solo to hear the truth?  That doesn’t matter; I’ll make sure he knows all about your treachery.  There won’t be any mourners at your funeral, Kuryakin—just revelers, celebrating your death.  You see, no one mourns the wicked.  Now turn around and face your end like a man!  I want to remember the look on your face forever.”

But the figure in the bed did not turn.

“Why…?” he whispered, weakly.  “Why… are you doing this…?”

“Why?” Mills repeated.  “You have the nerve to ask me why?  You know exactly what you did!  I was next in line to be Solo’s partner after his last one had failed.  I had applied for a transfer to Section II, and I would have been a field agent fighting by Solo’s side.  But instead of me getting the chance to work alongside him, you muscled your way in and got the position that should have been mine! I was certain that you would fail—that you would be sent back to Europe after all your gross failures.  But, somehow, you manipulated everyone into letting you stay—and that was when you brainwashed Solo, wasn’t it?  You bamboozled him into signing your transfer!”

“Nyet…”

“You did!” Mills roared.  “It’s the only explanation for how an all-American man like Solo would be seen in your company repeatedly!  And all I could do is watch helplessly as you got Solo to follow you around like a dog on a leash!  I would have liked to see him pull free of your control and fight back.  But I’ll have to live with this.”

He kicked the prone figure again; the figure grunted in pain again, but still refused to face him.

“And you weren’t satisfied with all of that, were you?  Not only did you put Solo under your power and used him to further your career for the last seven years, you muscled your way into Section VIII to hog more glory there, too!  Do you know what it’s been like, having to share space with a traitor and watch him steal the glory there while not being able to do anything about it because he has the CEA brainwashed as his personal attack dog?  It’s frustrating, having to put up with something like that, day in and day out!  But I saw through your little scheme right away—now that Solo is no longer of any use to you, you’re going to kill him on some mission and make it look like THRUSH did it.  And then your next plan is to get rid of Waverly and take over the New York branch and make us all march to the beat of your communist drum!  And I’m the one who gets to stop your nefarious plan!”

The figure didn’t respond this time, and Mills was too enveloped in his twisted fantasy to notice.

“I’ll be a hero once I stop you,” he said. “And I’ll actually look after Solo, unlike you.  I’m so glad I stopped you before you really did succeed in killing him.  I just wish Solo was here right now to see this moment.”

The figure in the bed now finally turned, revealing Napoleon in the bed, his Special raised and pointed at Mills; he fired once, knocking the weapon that Mills had been holding out of his hand.

“Be careful what you wish for,” Napoleon hissed, an angry fire burning in his eyes as he glared daggers at Mills.

Mills’s entire countenance changed from smug satisfaction to abject horror as Napoleon now aimed his Special squarely at his chest. He never imagined this—his “idol” pulling a gun on him, and with such anger.  Mills just couldn’t understand it; after everything he had said and did to expose Illya as a traitor, why was Napoleon upset!?

“Solo!  Solo, I’m so sorry!  I didn’t realize that Kuryakin made you take his place!  That fiend!  He wanted me to kill you--!”

“This was my idea,” Napoleon said.  “And after everything you put Illya through, consider it a miracle--and undeserved mercy--that my Special is loaded with tranquilizers and not bullets.”

“Solo!  Solo, please! Just listen to me!  Kuryakin--”

BANG.

Mills dropped to the floor like a rock; just as the tranquilizer took effect, he could discern Illya’s weakened form under the bed, watching him with an unreadable expression.  Illya’s weary expression lightened, however, as Napoleon now knelt down and tenderly lifted him out from under the bed and placed him back on it, tucking him in once more; this was all punctuated by Mills’s defeated moans just before he fell unconscious.

“It’s over, Illya,” Napoleon said, softly. “You’re safe now.”

“You blockhead…” Illya murmured.  “He could have shot you…”

“I was going by what you said about him taunting you,” Napoleon said, now handcuffing Mills’s hands behind his back before returning to Illya’s side.  “I had a feeling he’d do that before trying to finish ‘you’ off, so I did my best to keep him talking.  The original plan was to wait for backup to get here and then I’d have tranquilized him while he was distracted by their arrival.”

“You went ahead and shot him anyway…” Illya observed.

“…My emotions got the better of me,” Napoleon confessed.  He sighed. “Well, tell me something—if our situations had been reversed, and it had been me lying wounded and poisoned, and you were the one holding the gun on the one who had done it to me, what would you have done?”

“You are truly a paragon of mercy, Napoleon, for I would have used the actual bullets,” Illya admitted.

“I wanted to.  I really wanted to.”

“I doubt anyone would have faulted you, as Mills had the gun on you first,” Illya said.  “But, perhaps, I am glad you did not.”

“Really?”

“I would not have wanted you to change your ideals on my account,” Illya mused.  “One of us has to be the noble soul, and I have already taken on the role of the ruthless one.  I am known as the Ice Prince after all…”

“That’s a load of--”

“Napoleon…!”

“They don’t know you like I do,” Napoleon said. “You are anything but an ‘Ice Prince.’ You may hide your emotions well, but I can see them.”

“I let you see them.  I am a very private person.  I understand that this leads to my reputation, but until this fiasco with Mills, I had not thought that it could have ever come to something like this.”

“Mills isn’t a typical case,” Napoleon admitted. “He was stewing in jealousy for so long, he began to see things in a way that just weren’t true.  I don’t know where Mills got the idea that he had ever been in the running for my partner; something about him hadn’t felt right, and I never even considered accepting any of his many requests—in spite of all those gifts he tried to give me.”

“Yet you gave me a chance,” Illya mused.

“I consider myself able to read people very well,” Napoleon said.  “And besides that, I could tell that you were genuine.  Not only are you honest, but you don’t shy away from saying what you believe to be the blunt truth.  And that’s exactly what I needed—along with someone I could trust, someone I could enjoy spending time with…  All of those things.”

“Perhaps that’s what I was looking for, as well,” Illya mused.  He sighed, closing his eyes.  “Forgive me, Napoleon, but I am still very weak.”

“You don’t have to apologize,” Napoleon said, gently. “You just keep resting until you get your strength back.”

“Mmh,” Illya responded, and he was soon fast asleep. He didn’t even stir when April and Mark finally arrived with backup, taking Mills away and congratulating Napoleon on catching him alive whiling inquiring as to how Illya was.

Napoleon handled everything in stride, and he calmly waited for everyone to leave before reactivating the traps on the door and returning to Illya’s side.

Illya was sleeping peacefully, albeit deeply, and it was as Napoleon reached over to brush some strands of blond hair out of Illya’s eyes that he froze, staring at his own hand, which was suddenly shaking.

Napoleon frowned, trying to grab at his right wrist with his left hand, but not even that seemed to stop the tremor, nor did anything he try succeed in stopping the suddenly-swelling emotions in his chest.

With the danger gone, all of the adrenaline that had kept him going over the last two days was going away, leaving behind the very tired and worry-stricken agent who, despite being normally all smiles and confidence and usually handled adversity so well, was suddenly coming to grips with how close he had come to losing his partner.

He allowed himself a moment of weakness—burying his face in his hands for just a minute before returning to his normal, stoic self.  He glanced back once more at his partner.

It was the slow but steady rise and fall of Illya’s chest that gave Napoleon comfort.  Whatever remained of the poison was being fought back by Illya’s body.  Despite his pessimistic attitude from earlier, Illya was still fighting.

Napoleon sighed, recalling Illya’s words from before.

“Not even you can save me all the time…!”

He glanced at his partner once more, and managed a wan smile as he watched him peacefully sleep.

“Just let them try and stop me, Tovarisch,” he said, softly.  “It’s a challenge that I accept.”

His hand, no longer trembling, now resumed his original task of brushing Illya’s hair away from his face.

Some things, Napoleon decided, were worth fighting Destiny for.

                                                      Epilogue

Illya’s recovery was slow but steady; it took another couple of weeks before he was able to return to work, and, of course, Napoleon stayed back to look after him.  Illya had been quiet and contemplative throughout his recovery, and though he did talk to Napoleon about his thoughts, things clearly remained on his mind.  But it was to Napoleon’s concern that, upon Illya’s return to U.N.C.L.E., after warmly greeting Baba Yaga, Illya requested to go down to the morgue.  It was a bit more than Napoleon could stomach, so he waited outside the morgue with Baba Yaga as Illya opened the drawer holding the body of Colonel Nexor. It was more than a bit unnerving to look into the face of a dead man and seeing his own, but he pushed the thought aside and spoke aloud.

“So…” he said.  “Here we are.  You, still here.  And I very nearly joined you.”  He glanced at the other drawers before turning back to Nexor.  “What I’ve got to say won’t take long…  But I’ve got to say it.  You’ve brought me a great deal of trouble—but I suppose I can’t blame you entirely.  Mills would have found some other case to blame me for if it hadn’t been this one.”

He sighed, looking around the room once more.

“It strikes me as ironic,” he continued. “You and Gurnius had so many followers—countless people who either shared your horrific beliefs, or those you charmed and deceived into following you.  They swore fealty to you and your twisted vision.  As for myself, I don’t have very many I consider myself close to—certainly no followers to speak of.  But I have a very small group of people who mean a lot to me.  And though you and your followers outnumbered us by many, your supposedly loyal followers weren’t able to keep you or Gurnius alive—those who survived more or less abandoned you to your deaths, and yet, that small group of mine would have been ready to move the foundations of the Earth if they thought that it would have saved my life.  I have had a lot of time during my recovery to think about a lot of things, one of which was whether or not it would have been wise to resign—find some line of work in Little Russia where I would not be scrutinized as I am now. But then I thought of my little group—how I couldn’t leave them to fight evil such as your lot without me…”  He glanced out the glass panel on the door, looking at Napoleon, who was still waiting patiently for him.  “How I couldn’t bear the thought of not being by Napoleon’s side.  I belong with him—with them.  I suppose I can dare to say that some good came from all of this—that I understand the importance of my being here, for they would not have fought tooth and nail to keep me safe had I not been important to them.”

He turned back to Nexor’s body once more.

“This experience was still, nevertheless, extremely unpleasant, and, therefore, I cannot thank you,” he said, matter-of-factly. “But I will carry the lessons I have learned from it for a long time.”

His piece said, he closed the drawer back up and headed outside, nodding to Napoleon that he was finished.

“I never did give Mr. Waverly the mission report,” he realized, as the two of them, with Baba Yaga in tow, headed back to their office.  “I suppose I have a lot of paperwork to catch up on?”

“I’ll help you with it,” Napoleon promised, as he opened the door to their office.  “But, before that, I have a little something I’ve been planning…”

“SURPRISE!”

Illya stopped in his tracks, blinking as he saw the sight in their office.  Dozens of people were there, from all sections of U.N.C.L.E.—and even Janet was there with a visitor’s badge on, standing with April, Mandy, George, and Mark. Waverly was there, too, standing beneath a large “Welcome Back” banner.  And on the desk was a tray of bagels of all kinds, with cream cheese and other toppings for them (Baba Yaga hungrily eyeing the lox).

“We never had our bagels,” Napoleon said. “So I came up with the idea of a welcome back bagel party for you.  The others brought the idea to life, though.”

“…You didn’t have to do this…” Illya said, clearly taken aback.

“We wanted to, Illya,” April said, sincerely.

“Napoleon told us about his idea, and we all agreed that we wanted to show you our appreciation for everything that you do here,” Mandy added.

“And not just here,” Janet said.  “I mean, you helped me—and I’m sure you’ve helped so many other people.”

“You aren’t kidding,” George said.  “If we invited all the innocents you’ve helped, they’d have violated the building’s fire codes…”

“So, this little impromptu gathering had to do,” Mark said, and he turned to Waverly.  “Anything to add, Sir?”

“Just a hearty ‘welcome back’ to you, Mr. Kuryakin,” Waverly said, with a nod.  “I think you’ll be pleased to know that Mills is slated for deprogramming before his imprisonment—and we’ve decided that Mr. Solo will be the one to do it.”

“It would be my pleasure, Sir,” Napoleon said, with a nod.  “Can Illya be present?”

“If he so chooses,” Waverly said.  “Now, then, before we have this little party, I think it’s only appropriate that you say a few words in recognition of your partner’s return, Mr. Solo.”

“Ah…” Napoleon said, and he took a moment to gather his thoughts before continuing.  “Well, no one is more relived and happy than I am to see Illya back here, of course.  Illya has been my partner for seven years now, and, well…  I can only say that, ever since day one, it’s been an adventure—one that I’ve been enjoying every minute of.  That includes both the good and the bad; I know we don’t like those bad times, but even the bad times help me realize just how much he means to me. And, believe me, this latest fiasco has reminded me of that a lot.”

He looked to Illya now, ignoring the crowd listening to him, and just looked into his partner’s eyes.

“Just after I’d been able to take you home, while you were resting and I was encouraging you to get better, I said that I didn’t know where I’d be without you.  Well, I’ve done a lot of thinking about that these past couple weeks, and…  It turns out that’s not quite true,” Napoleon admitted. “I do know where I’d be—and it’s not a pretty place.  Lost. Alone.  Probably dead, so that’s technically moot.  I’ve always known that I was a lucky person, and I don’t think there’s any greater example of that than knowing that you’re my partner, always having my back.”

“You know that I am dubious about things such as luck,” Illya said now.  “But I do agree that I am a better man on account of knowing you, and having you as my partner, as well.  And I do hope that this team of ours continues to do what we do best.”

“I know we will,” Napoleon said, and he drew the Russian into a tight hug, which Illya returned.

And even though the room broke into applause (led by Waverly, no less), the two of them were practically oblivious to it until they broke apart, and the party began.  And as Illya, Napoleon, and their circle of friends took part in the bagels, they both realized how lucky they were, indeed.

They had each other—and even more, too.

                                                     The End

[ruffsficstuffplace]

The Keeper of the Grove (Part 72)

The dining hall of Manor Schnee had been temporarily turned into a combination situation room/planning area/mess hall for the space and the slapdash nature of their operations.

Among other Queensguard, Agent Gumshoe waited there, pulling out a Fizzle Stick from her breast pocket, putting it into her mouth, and lighting it with her antique Zippo. The tip of the candy started to crackle, the sugar inside it melting and pouring out the other side, and she began to chew.

“They say we were all lucky that we came when we did, guns blazing and putting all kinds of holes in the plans of the Heralds and whoever the hell the ‘Council’ are,” she said. “Poor bastards don’t realize we Queensguard didn’t have the winning numbers on our tickets, and probably never will.”

Used to it, and with their own eccentric quirks beside, none of the other agents commented.

“It’s a hard life, being a Queensguard.

“You got your personal issues, your awful pasts, and your honest desire to make a difference in this world and help people out by putting holes in others, wondering if you’re a fuckin’ hero who deserves a parade, or just a gun with two legs someone else is throwing into the fray for them.

“Then you join the program, and everything goes to even deeper shit.

“Physical training that’ll make the Old World’s Marine Corps weep. School, the kind of eyebrow burning usually done by people lookin’ to tack some fancy letters to their name, have people callin’ em Dr. Whoever-The-Fuck. And don’t get me started on the third part of our training…

“Psychological Conditioning’ they call it, if only because ‘Mental Torture’ doesn’t sound as nice.

“They build us up, then seni through straight through hell and back, then send us back for however many go-arounds it takes before we break. Then they pick the pieces up, glue ‘em all back together best as they can, rinse and repeat, until they either wash out, or they come out the other side one certified Badass Motherfucker who can take on goddamn anything.

“You can’t do something like that without leaving plenty of scars, though, some of them more obvious than others.

“Take Agent Qi, here. Fuckin’ obsessed with the number 7, and his fancy revolver.”

“Seven is life,” Agent Qi said. “Six bullets, one barrel—seven.”

“Won’t say no to a mission that doesn’t have anything—and I mean anything—about it that is or adds up to seven, be it the time the shit’s going down, the letters in the name, or even the coordinates on the map.

“But if it does, you can be sure as shit he’s going to coast through all that with a smile on his face, like he’s the luckiest man in all the realm.”

“Then there’s Agent Gwendolyn, AKA ‘The Knight.’

“Lost her whole team in a mission where she was shadowing all the other functioning nutcases we call ‘Queensguard Agents.’ Almost died along with them—had actually, for a few seconds before her suit’s revival protocols kicked in and zapped her brain back to life, but either something went wrong in the process, or it was that particular moment that she cracked like the rest of us Rank 7’s did, got it in her head that the only way she was going to get through this and more if Gwendolyn died, and was reborn as someone better.

“So now she goes around narrating everything like me, except she calls herself ‘The Knight.’”

Everyone stopped as a new agent walked in, carrying a tray of food in her still armoured hands.

“Hello everyone,” Winter said.

Gumshoe pulled out the free seat next to her.

“Thank you,” Winter said as she sat down, and began to eat.

“You’re welcome, doll. If’n you don’t mind, I’m gonna continue my whole shtick with you.”

“Go on ahead, Gummy, it’s not like it isn’t all over the Info-Grid,” Winter replied.

“Thanks, doll.” Gumshoe replied. She chewed what remained of her fizzle stick for a few moments, then continued.

“And then there’s Winter.

“You’d think the name was her call sign, seeing as she’s got a reputation for keeping her cool through everything; melting her walls and becoming the warmest damn person you’d ever met in your entire life if it’d serve her mission well to butter you up before she cut straight to your heart like a hot knife; and being more than a little bit of a bitch, but no:

“That’s what her grandma named her, like she could see in the future and decided to save a future lover the trouble of nicknaming her their own version of ‘Frosty the Snowbitch.’

“So what’s wrong with someone who sounds like the mythical Queensguard Agent that makes it through training completely intact? Even someone who looks about as well-put together as can be like Ironwood has got his issues.

“Five words: The Keeper of the Grove.”

Winter choked on her food. Gumshoe picked up her drink for her, she took a long swig then sighed in relief.

“You need me to stop, sweetheart?”

“I’m fine...” Winter whispered.

“If you say so. Anyway...

“As Fear is a pretty helpful emotion for getting your ass in gear when you need it to, she didn’t beat it out of her so much as she made it so that she was scared of as few things as possible. Maybe she might get startled or uneasy, but never shitting-your-pants terror.

“It had seemed like a good idea at the time: she was already pretty well and tramautized from a horror show way back when she was still a sweet and innocent kid, and what would be the problem with being scared exclusively by someone that only existed in myth, pop culture, and really bad costumes on Eve of the Ether?

“When it turns out they live in Reality too, that’s what!

“As the Keeper was terrorizing her and her little sis in this very mansion, us crazies in the Queensguard thought Winter had finally broken for good, that this time, there would be no picking the pieces back up and gluing them back together. All we thought we were doing when we hauled her conked-out ass back to base was fix her as much as possible before we set her up for a nice, quiet civilian life with a hefty pension and a whole lotta perks beside.

“Then we all watched the Keeper 86 her sister on live holovision, and it turned out that the only thing in little tiny pieces that couldn’t be put back together was what we thought was reality.

“Nothing new, really, considering all the other crazy shit that happens in Avalon that necessitates an even crazier bunch of loons willing to protect it—AKA the Queensguard—but it still caught us all off guard.

“By the time we realized our big mistake, her sister was dead, the rest of her whole family was in the ground or may as well have been, and since she only ever kept working for us to keep her sister safe, she had pretty much lost everything she ever gave a fuck about.

“And what do you do with someone with nothing to lose?

“Give them everything to gain—namely, the Shepherd Suit Mk. IV, the latest in the line.

“First, Piper’s gearheads strapped guns and sturdy pieces of scrap metal to exo-suits originally made for hauling boxes around, then we started slapping armour and weapons designed specifically for getting shot and shooting right back, and then we shrank it down so you if you wanted to enter a building, you’d only have to duck to avoid banging your head, than break down the door and take a good chunk of the wall while you were at it.

“So where do we go from there?

“You make it smaller, faster, and strap some wings and the very cutting edge in energy-weapons to it, is what you do.

“There’s only three things that are keeping the Big Guys Upstairs from equipping every single trooper with these:

“One, it’s expensive as hell to mine, refine, and use this much Exanite and a shit-ton of other super-rare metals that all the armour, the weaponry, and the wiring needs.

“Two, it eats up power like a bus full of relapsed alcoholics at last call for Happy Hour, which is why it’s a damn good thing it can take out entire armies in the blink of an eye.

“And three, once you put it on, you can’t ever take it off—unlike its older siblings, the spine-jack on this thing becomes part of your actual spine.

“We thought we were just making the best of a very bad situation like usual, squeezing out some more use out of someone we thought we were going to have to put out to pasture, and who didn’t want to go there yet, either.

“But it turns out, the timing couldn’t have been better, because now the little sister turns out to be a whole lot less dead than we thought, we’ve got a messiah gone missing and possibly rogue, and a whole bunch of loonies with alien magitech and animal ears running about the whole realm causing hell and talking about something they call ‘The Truth.’

“You could be blind, and still read all the signs pointing to the one place that has the answers to all the latest mysteries Avalon is throwing at us:

“The Viridian Valley.

“So how many of us loons are going with you out there, soon as it gets dark and we don’t get turned to people-jerky soon as we step out the barrier?” Gumshoe asked.

“None,” Winter replied. “I’m going in with two Tinmen, and that’s mostly for recharging my core.”

Surprise came over all the agents faces.

“Seriously, doll?” Gumshoe asked.

“Yes, seriously,” Winter replied, her serious expression the most serious the others had ever seen.

“Sure you won’t end up putting your waste-management subsystems on overdrive when you eyeball her?” Gumshoe continued.

“I’m sure,” Winter replied. “I may have been absolutely terrified of the Keeper for almost all my life, but that ends now, because the face of my nightmares has kidnapped my little sister, brainwashed her, and seduced her.”

She raised her fists to the sky and started screaming.

“DO YOU HEAR ME, KEEPER?!

“YOU SEALED YOUR FATE WHEN YOU ‘KILLED’ MY LITTLE SISTER ON LIVE HOLIVISION, AND I’M ONLY MORE DETERMINED TO UTTERLY ANNIHILATE YOU NOW THAT YOU’VE KISSED HER ON LIVE HOLOVISION, TOO!

“I’M SCORCHING YOU WITH MY LASERS LIKE BOTH THOSE SCENES WERE SCORCHED INTO MY BRAIN—ESPECIALLY THE SECOND ONE!

“SERIOUSLY! WHAT THE ACTUAL FUCK?!”

Winter sighed and got up from her seat. “Excuse me, everyone, I need to go get some last-minute repairs and upgrades before my big mission...”

“You do that!” Gumshoe yelled, as she and all the other agents were gathered up at the furthest corner away from Winter as possible, holding up their guns and projecting shields.

Winter left the dining hall, the agents slowly returned to their seats.

“Turns out there’s a fourth downside to the Mk. IV!” Gumshoe muttered as she chewed the last of her fizzle stick, pulled out a new one with shaking hands. “If it turns out the person you put it in is STILL pretty batshit insane, getting them out of the suit is going to be a LOT harder than putting them in…

“Like I said: we thought it was a good idea at the time...”