#maybe there’s something. i havent finished the game yet. *maybe* there’s something.

[quietwingsinthesky]

syndicate is just a deeply weird game in what it does and does not want to acknowledge about the systemic injustices of victorian london and how the assassin/templar conflict reflects it

karl marx is here but god forbid he advocate for violence. you can save children from factory work but we’re not going to bring up anything deeper about why child labor is so popular. we’re not bringing up sex workers until it’s time for the dlc about murdering them. you’re besties with the queen and churchill. what are we doing here, guys.

[harvestmoth]

been watching scene 0. i like this thing

[sea-buns]

the things my mind will do to NOT have to face the consequences of a traumatic story arc

"oh so and so died last week? and the new episode is tonight? hmm sounds like it'll be a good one...

.....y'know i've really been meaning to get into [absolute rabbit hole of a fandom]"

[anomalouscutie]

bold theory but im like 80% sure that the spiderman 2 story was a little lackluster because the dlc is going to be doing a lot more of the heavy lifting this time around

[freyito]

ᴛʀɪᴄᴋ ᴏʀ ᴛʀᴇᴀᴛ! ⨟ ɪᴅɪᴀ ꜱʜʀᴏᴜᴅ

✭ pairing(s): idia shroud x gn reader

✩ in which: he celebrates halloween with you.

✧ a/n: i got attached to this Guy overnight and i need to take a bite out of him. Anyways!

✦ taglist: @shinysora

→ trick or treat masterlist

🗒 cw: gn reader, just fluff :P, maybe a little ooc? (havent read ignihyde's chapter yet ((so many idia vignettes tho)), not proofread

✎ wc: 677

Trick

Well, for one, Idia is absolutely, positively, against any party whatsoever. He’s not here for the hype week, he’s in it for the candy and showing off his cosplay skills. As such, unless you are in his room at all times, he kind of sucks at communication during Halloween Season. Which means unless you want some alone time (or he kicks you out), you’re bunking with him quite a bit. No matter how much he protests.

You might get dragged into his games, especially with their Halloween events. If even one of them has a co-op or invitation event, you’re pushed into making a new account or joining him. And you must, at least, run dungeons with him 10 times a day. He has to stay at the top of rankings somehow! And you’re his key to that, one that he’s not necessarily willing to give up, either.

He also tends to buy extra candy. What, to give away? No! He’s hoarding this stuff like a dragon and it’s pile of gold. Sure, he’ll give you some, but if he has to play nice, he’s doubling his pay. In gummy worms. Oh, and he gatekeeps any gummies from other people. Not you, of course, you can take as much as you want (as long as you leave him some of the blue raspberry or cherry flavored ones). But, this leads to an excess of candy bags just… chilling in his room now. Not that he tosses them wherever he wants, he has a carefully crafted system, you know. But sometimes there is something known as too much candy.

Treat

Despite all of that, isn’t Idia the best person to hang out with during Halloween? With all his dedication to his costume, it comes out genuinely wonderful. He spent most of his time working on the finer details, one of the truest adaptations of… which character was it again? You’ve heard so much of this character that it feels like your brain has fizzled out. Regardless, his costume is still amazing, you’re a little jealous. And you’re sure you’ll hear much more about the character, and you’ll be subjected to watching the show regardless. Not that you mind.

You are in for a nice and cozy night, however. After the parade is done and Idia’s social battery is thoroughly drained, all he wants to do is either sleep (which he can’t because he’s gorged himself on candy), or finish up the events on his games to make sure he stays at the top of the rankings. Once he’s finally free of his costume (after about an hour…), he takes a couple of minutes in your arms, laying on top of you like a massive pillow, while he mutters something about his costume and what not. After about half an hour, he’s up and at ‘em, back at his game. Perhaps he’s realized how he’s neglected you over the month, and so he does his best to include you in his gametime, whether you choose to play with him, or simply sit on his bed and listen to what he has to say.

Before the sugar wears off, Idia is suddenly cramming in a last minute grind session, hopping from server to server to kill the event’s boss as the minutes tick down. Even as he’s fighting sleep, he’s kicking monster ass and topping the rankings. You can feel yourself slipping into sleep until he jolts you awake with a loud “YEEESSS!”. Almost immediately after that leaves his mouth, he’s apologizing profusely to you in a soft voice, completely forgetting about his game and slinking over with his hands out like he was calming down a scared horse.

With his win secured, he slips into bed easily. Which is earlier then he usually falls asleep, about a couple more hours before. But he’s won top ranking player during almost every event for three years in a row, and perhaps it’s time to celebrate (by sleeping early– and sleeping in even later), and also apologize for waking you up so abruptly.

© freyito, 2024 | masterlist | queue | kofi | discord server | star header by roseschoices DO NOT REPOST AS YOUR OWN, REPOST ON ANY OTHER PLATFORM, OR USE FOR AI/AI CHATBOTS.

[relgnira]

Uh week 2 of @shepscapades drawing challenge thing! Ive had this sketched for like a week and finally finished it haha

Its a Celeste au! Celeste is my favorite game ever if you havent played it please please please give it a shot its so good. These are just the first thoughts that came to me when I thought about this, so have my unrefined brain crystals ~

Transcribed the written text under the cut:

Part of Cleo (Joe)

• does actually have a “human” form but prefers to be a bird around people other than Cleo for the ~mystery~

• more helpful than Cleo

Old Woman (Cleo)

• elderly woman who lives on the mountain and seems to enjoy hasseling hikers

• very confidant in herself, once she sees how determined Grian is she helps him find his confidence

• they become good friends post mountain

Grian

• pretty much the same motives as Madeline

• heard about Celeste mountain from his best friend Jimmy

• can’t believe he’s actually doing this

Part of Grian

• extremely impulsive to the point of danger, but will begin an anxious spiral afterwords that causes the world to distort and eyes to open everywhere

• when accepted, he gives the triple jump ability with a flap of wings

Mumbo

• one of the civil engineers that worked on the now-forsaken city

• got unlucky and just died at his desk one day, but he hasn’t realized yet and keeps frantically trying to finish an already-abandoned city

• when he meets Grian, he thinks he is there to finally approve his designs and keeps trying to show him his models and plans

Scar

• claims to be climbing the mountain to get some painting inspo, but maybe he is trying to escape something as well…

• will show a fold-out wallet full of Jellie pics if prompted (or even if he isn’t)

[polish-art-tournament]

Hello! I want to follow more poll and tournament blogs and I thought you maybe have some recommendations since you are organizing one of them! Would you mind linking some of your favourite poll blogs? I love what you are doing here 😊

hello! i will try to list some of my favourites, but i'm afraid they are all quite famous and you probably already know them (so if anyone else has some recommendations, pls send?)

@historical-fashion-polls lets you vote for your favourite historical outfits from old fashion plates

@holmesillustrations is a tournament for old sherlock holmes illustrations (i reckon it should be a lot of fun even if you are not super familiar with the holmes books!)

@hotvintagepoll has many hot vintage actors, and lately some very fun polls for the redemption round

@napoleonic-sexyman-tournament to quote the op: What good is a European War if you can't objectify the people in tight pants and feathered hats? (now with a bonus latin america independence fighters bracket)

@haveyoubeentothiscity - what it says on the tin, i really like that they have a separate option for "i havent been but know of this city"

@whosthatsilmcharacter is a very fun game if like me you are Unwell about the silmarillion

@companion-showdown for doctor who tournaments

@couldtheycatchkira a classic, you just need to know a little bit about death note

@latin-literature-tourney sadly hasnt updated in a while but i hope it will be back

if you are familiar with polish language and/or culture there is @bitwa-lektur-szkolnych and @jedzonkopyszne (currently doing a polish cakes tournament)

and of course @incognitopolls and all of its sister blogs with anonymously submitted polls

i have many favourite tournaments that have already finished and would also welcome some recs, so if anyone follows something fun (especially if it has to do with art? 👀) please let me know!

EDIT. @polishpoems hasnt started yet but i am very excited for it!! (thank you to the person who reminded me abt it in the notes)

[thestrongestjewel]

Thoughts on the Project Spacetime Outertale fangame? I thought it was alright for the most part (except the parts when it completely misunderstands Undertale and butchers the lore :/ )

ok first off damn that sounds lowkey passive agressive-

but to answer your question I might as well go on a full rant!

I have a lot of thoughts about it, I havent shared a bunch because I haven't finished it and im not sure if I will! it feels unfair to critizise something If i havent finished seeing all of it, but there are many things that bug me about it!

before I get into that, I do wanna say that I am enjoying it a lot, i think the music is nice and it fits the vibes perfectly, the sprites are neat and the designs of the characters are super cute and I actually really like the added lore I think its vry interesting :DD

outertale is an au that I enjoy a lot as a concept and I think it has a lot of potential for a full fangame, and seeing ps!ot coming out is rlly cool :D

but like I said I do have some issues with it,,, most of them are personal and again, I have yet to finish the game

BUT

I think the way some of the dialogue is written, specially at the start(it gets better near the end of starton imo!) just feels very robotic and like its taking too much from the og game? but like i said, it gets better so it didnt really bothered me that much

I dont wanna get into spoiler territory too much, but if u wanna skip to my next point go ahead just dont read what is higlighted in blue!

there's a mechanic that makes you gain lv by being mean to monsters in acts, this is something i was not aware of and just realized because i had gone from lv 0 to lv 1, I think I accidentally fucked up my pacifist run?? Im not sure but it feels kinda odd that that's not something you would get warned about!

idk what it is about the way the areas where designed but I get lost really easily and they're kinda hard to navigate?? or maybe thats just me, thats more of a personal thing!!

anyway thats the end of my rant

idk i will try finishing the game

[shadowlinktheshadow]

ok fuck it im finally gonna write down ramble about the similarities between castle in the sky and spirit tracks rhghghrr

case #1: the characters

in my very private and running around inside my mind headcanons, I see a lot of close things between pazu and link

pazu is a sweet boy (maybe even naive) who helps those in need (like every protagonist) hes a very dedicated worker in the mines, and loves machinery

same could be said for link, who never talks in game but shows his shyness and and also sweet nature. (perhaps this is only around zelda,) you could take the fact that he doesnt even want to get up at the beginning of the game to take his exam because he dislikes the job, but this is where my headcanons come in. in short, hes a child genius and a perfectionist and works himself a little too much, and gets really eepy. so yes he loves machines (trains) as well

oh, and they are both orphans. (link is a bit difficult because hes usually always some type of parentless/guardianless child but anyways-)

and even other than personality and hobbies, their looks have similar parts too

of course, theyre not carbon copies of each other (such as colors being different) but the gloves and, especially to me, the cap is the one that sticks out. like. no other zelda game has him wearing a hat like that

(I just realized the gloves r the same color holy shit 💀) ((bruh and the posture lmao💀💀))

now I dont have much to say about sheeta and zeldas similarities (sorry) but they are both royals (well 1 of royal descent)

case #2: character relationships

spirit tracks zelink is what is keeping me alive so heres some similarities

I love love love the "hopeless romantic commoner falls in love with literal princess (she loves him back)" trope. which, pazu and sheetas relationship is a little different, but the vibes are the same

both couples? pairs? are so innocently in love with each other (maybe link shows it more) but just look:

they are so rhghghrhHRHFHFJJ HISS HISS HISS 💜💜💜💜💜😭😭🔥🔥💜

and finally the catching part in the movie

now you may ask "oh totk link caught zelda something something skyward sword falling blah blah blah" (im joking pls dont hate 💀) but this catch is different than those

they arent both falling, bro is already on the ground

you know who else is on the ground?

THIS BITCH

pazu may seem more.. graceful in catching sheeta compared to link, but (according to my dad) the whole joke of link dropping zelda comes from this movie (I havent finished it so idk) but I do know pazu struggles under the weight of sheeta after all the magic stuff goes away 😂

case #3: minor stuff

so I havent watched the entire movie yet, but heres some other things I saw

birds

they r both doves...... interesting....

though different, they also both play an instrument (link plays a panflute and pazu a trumpet)

also the design similarities in the robots and the phantoms, but ive run out of photos and time so that's kt

thanks for coming to my tedtalk (to the 3 people that will see this 💀)

[cloudcountry]

I wanted to ask why you hated Idia so much back then and the reason you adore him?

im gonna start telling people to pay me whenever they ask why i hate(d) idia because ive got this question easily 20 different times and frankly i'm losing money by not accepting payment

im not writing all that again i'm so tired of explaining it over and over ughhhh its not your fault min its just i seem to be a skipping record with how often i've had to repeat the same thing over and over and over for a YEAR and people just KEEP ASKING like ok you want to know about my relationship with idia shroud PAY UP!!!!!

anyways...i havent written about the things i adore about him yet so...

first first first!! the thing that made me gasp the softest gasp i have ever gasped in my life when i first saw it...his pink hair. its a bit superficial i guess but now that i like idia i think he's stunning. he's so hauntingly beautiful, especially when he's just a little bit flustered and the tips of his hair turn pink. what i would do to see his whole head turn pink PLEASE.

i also think his smile is so silly, even though it's usually accompanied by his smug ass voice "should'a leveled up more!" SHUT UP!!!!! i love his sharp teeth theyre so goofy nd silly but in a cute way. honestly i think his scowl is cute too, idk maybe i just like his lips but watching them twist up in annoyance when he rolls his eyes is attractive to me dont ask i dont know either. does that say something about me? maybe. i'm content with not knowing.

onto less superficial things...i just finished reading book six yesterday and it struck me how idia's heart is genuinely so beautiful. he loves so gently and fully, but with devotion that would destroy the world if he let it loose. being loved and treasured by idia is a privilege, because once he lets you in he would do anything for you (just dont fuck it up or i will beat you up im being so serious LEAVE HIM ALONE)

the extent to which he cares for ortho is so beautiful and so heartbreaking. "leave it to your big bro" im dead. everything he does is for ortho to have a safe and fulfilling life and honestly...it kind of seems like idia is trying to pay ortho back in a sense? like you died (because of me), now i will spend the rest of my life mourning you as punishment. he wants to give him the best life possible and thats just so ourgourgouhgohou,,,, his grieving is so complex and yet its so simple. heartbreaking i tell you.

on a lighter note, he's very passionate about the things he's into as well. one thing about figuring our how to like idia was turning my reaction to his condescending jabs from "oh he's such a know it all bitch what the hell people are literally just indulging in his interests what is wrong with him?" TO "oh he's just excited and getting an adrenaline rush, it's going to his head. he's happy. :)" and that was absolutely growth on my part because. ok AUBURN LORE TIME but i used to have a friend who was very condescending and a HUGE know it all (irl IRL IRL) and i think they definitely impacted how i saw idia because i saw bits of them in him. and since they hurt me so much i projected my experiences with them onto idia, so the first time i met him in game i wrote him off immediately and hated him after i saw what he said to others and how he acted.

but one of the many problems with that approach was that i missed the gentler sides of him. the way he goes back to school for ortho. the way he powers through the masquerade social for ortho. his idea of yuu being "valuable emotional support." his love of cats, regardless of how bad he scared grim. his love of star rogue and the way he made the sequel actually happen, albiet unintentionally. i spent so much time resenting him because "of course he's just another one of those." that i didn't stop to notice anything about him except for those bad moments. and of course, i'm not ignoring them now, i just see them differently. i see him differently.

of course i love that he's relatable, and that he's smart, and i love how when he's comfortable he loses his filter and becomes idia shroud instead of just being Scared of them, but i think that's just. social anxiety. and yk what ive said this before but even when i hated him i would NOT stand for anyone coming for his anxiety. like yeah i hate idia shroud but BITCH GET AWAY FROM HIM. YOU DONT KNOW WHAT ANXIETY IS LIKE!!! put me in nrc right now idia shroud needs someone who will yell at people for him and thats going to be ME. i dont care who you are you say shit you are earning my IRE. trey clover got yelled at. no one is safe.

can i just say i love how you said "reason" like there's only one JDSJSDJSD LMAO IDK IT WAS JUST FUNNY TO ME when i love someone i have multiple reasons and i love every part of them, even the bad annoying icky parts (in fact, if you can't love their bad parts too is it even love...? i dont know, we all have different definitions anyway. some might think tolerating their bad parts is love too and we'd both be right.) theres no one reason i just think he's lovely inside and out now. he's an angel, basically.

[gamenburger]

ALRIGHT EVERYONE, HERE'S WHAT IM UP TO:

Thank you for finding and following me. Periodically I like to give updates to keep me accountable for what I'm working on. Here is the short list of what You will see from me in the future: MID DECEMBER: UnSanctioned RECollection (Goblin Bunker Zine Jam #3) I run a zine jam in the GOBLIN BUNKER, which I hang out in regularly. This one was about emulation and piracy (vaguely)! I am drawing the cover and finalizing the order as we speak, so expect a release for digital and all printing formats before Christmas! Find older Zine Jam entries here! https://gamenburger.itch.io/ END/BEGINNING OF the YEAR: Every year I write a long blog about every impactful media and every game I played this year. It's quite a bit, and i draw a lot of pictures for it too. Expect it this year as well on my blog, Grim In Pink | Substack SOMETIME MID JANUARY: THE RETURN OF MOBIUS LOOP Some of you may have actually followed me for sonic related reasons. THats right, i run an archie sonic read-along in the goblin bunker too with discord user rist! They're cool... and do most of the real interesting work. Issue 8 will cover EVERYTHING we've read, so it will be a great way to catch up if you want to join! you can find older issues here: https://gamenburger.itch.io/

Soon AFTER, but in no particular order:

ANALYSIS OF THE KILLER: yes. I want to revisit the game and give spoilerfic analysis- i'm not ready to let go just yet. I'll keep you all posted when i draw stuff for it.

FROM THE DESERT SAND, WE BUILT A BURGER: My current passion project... I mean to put into longform words a giant analysis on the politics of food distribution, mcdonalds, and two terrible movies I hate to my core.

A MONTHLY ARTICLE YOU CAN HAVE MAILED TO YOU? MAYBE? I may have an opportunity soon...

Plussing my old articles/ reviews as zines so i can table them? Maybe? IDK? People like that koopa kids article....

Two zines, one about BEFORE THE GREEN MOON and one about 24 KILLERS. please play those games if you havent. They are excellent.

There is an article about Sonic 2's level layouts collecting dust. I swear I will finish it.

And much later, something else...?

Thank you for sticking around everyone.

[lunarleonardo]

Lunar! I read that M5 was partially based off of YTTD! Do you have any ideas between maybe a V3 x YTTD fic now that Nankidai said something about the development?!

If Nankidai has recently said something about development I havent seen it O_O last one I saw was from February, so if Im missing something i would LOVE to know

As for a V3 x YTTD fic... I have had thoughts like that before :P The closest I've come to that is dunking Kokichi and Shuichi into a YTTD-centered roleplay, but other than that I've been so focused on other things the thought hasn't crossed my mind. I LOVE writing crossovers, but I don't read them very often so I don't tend to post them on ao3 since theres so many other stories I want to finish and share :{ (i have way too many mha x v3 oneshots where shuichi and midoriya become friends do NOT get me started)

I would 100% be down to write a v3 x yttd crossover though. With games like these the crossover potential is WILD, because it can come in so many shapes and forms!! Is the YTTD cast put into a DR-typical killing game? Is the V3 cast put into the Majority Vote Death Game? Are they ALL mashed into one or the other? Or maybe Lunar just goes off its rocker and seizes its favorites by the throat to put them through The Trenches. Whos to say

However seeing as YTTD is still incomplete, I dont quite want to write a fic around YTTD since I dont have all of the details yet. We only have part of the story and, until that full story is given to us, I dont think I'd be able to accurately write the characters ｡ﾟ(ﾟ´Д｀ﾟ)ﾟ｡ So we can put that crossover on my "List of things I want to write but my 1 fic at a time rule keeps these all in a tiny little box until the right time comes" queue and wait and see what happens ^w^

[tapwater118]

gonna take you up on that whole “i give you: ramblings - you give me: approval/a number from 1-10” thing, liy related since i know shes on the mind. this wouldve been what that liy&one fic i vagueposted about in tapcord focuses on btw, chances of me finishing that are slim so i’m just gonna talk about it here!

liy’s been shown to be very inquisitive and focused on her adventures, see how throughout bfb + tpot 1 with how she reacts to the exit backdoor. and so a new mystery afoot? contestants disappearing left and right only to return with their limbs back? hesitant to discuss the things they did? thats prime for liy’s next adventure!

i always imagine her with one of those big investigation boards tying things together with pins and string, shes tying points together late at night but things just won’t make sense! atleast not until someone decides to make a special visit…

bam! shes in one’s lair, after some sort of frantic failed escape attempt, panic sets in due to the fact that she was caught by yet another blue number, cue angst thanks to exit ptsd, but worry not! one is here. she tells liy how theyve been watching eachother for a while, in a way, and how she’d like to make a deal!

liy’s an outcast - likely feeling some sort of inability to truly connect to people after debutting into tpot, even if she had made great friends with everyone on her team (bottle and pen atleast), the exit almost certainly took its toll, as represented through pencil. theres also her killing past, something which definitely still is present in her in some way. those who know her the best? foldy and stapy? they know about it! she cant escape it anyway. not to mention the looming threat of being eliminated again, who knows what’ll happen there! it definitely is something weighing on her mind constantly after the exit

all that to say she’s very vulnerable to a deal being made in ‘her favor’. unlike all the other contestants, she also doesn’t have the same loyalty to two that everyone else does, making her the prime candidate by one as her proxy in the game. she couldn’t do this with anyone else previously, but she could play, and win tpot through liy, getting two’s powers not through force but instead by pulling the strings from the shadows. she’d probably offer liy a fraction of the powers of two - heck maybe even some of one’s power upfront!

so yeah! liy signs the deal admitidly hesitantly, but it’ll bring her what she wants, she believes. whether or not this comes true? who knows! i havent thought about things more but thats where you could throw in your own thoughts if you like i’ve exerted enough brainpower here. liyone toxic yuri is real btw

9/10 the one point docked because you forgot the sloppy make out

[cod-thoughts]

Sorry you got some bad news, I hope you're doing okay <3 Numbers for the ask game; 4, 7, 38 please!

I'll be fine, it's just stuff on top of stuff on top of stuff so uhh not the best time and i have my finals starting in a few days too so its uhhh not great but i'll be fine it is what it is :O

Ask game in question!

4: How many fic ideas are you nurturing right now? Care to share one of them?

Oh boy theres a LOT, i use notion to like keep track of all my ideas cause it syncs nicely and its a good archive, i dont use it to write cause the spell check sucks lol but its good storage. The problem with that system tho is the moment i get an idea i jot it down there so theres currently 47 ramblings and ideas, some are similar so i eventually combine them! I did a random number generator to pick the idea lol and it was number 13: reverse dating trope, basically people not believing that a couple is together! Havent decided who yet but its probably gonna end up as a 5+1 knowing me lol

7: Share a snippet from one of your favorite pieces of prose you’ve written and explain why you’re proud of it.

This was hard, mostly cause i dont think most of my stuff is that good but id have to say this section from day 1 of ghostpriceweek and its probably the work im most proud of to this day, i just think it flowed so well and that their voices are really solid. Here's a part of it that i like for no particular reason:

"He’d finished heating up a tin of beans, stirring it absently before putting the lid on it to keep it warm, and set the kettle on for tea, knowing Price would be done soon. The small tasks felt grounding, almost domestic—there’s that word again, strange but, maybe, it was what had been playing at the edges of his mind for a while now. This rare ease, this strange new rhythm. Ghost found himself watching the steam rising from the kettle, a bit lost in the warmth that filled the air.

He wasn’t quite sure when it happened—when the lines between Price as a superior, a mentor, had blurred into something… more. It was a disquieting thought, one he’d been trying to keep at bay, though not with much success. And here he was, cooking up beans and making tea, so utterly settled in Price’s presence that the prospect of leaving, of returning to the job, made him feel something uncomfortably close to hollow.

He never imagined this was even possible for him. To be alive and wanting something so fiercely. To want a life outside of being a soldier. It was all he ever knew but as the kettle clicked and he made them a cup each, exactly how Price liked it, it hit him like a blow: this was it. This was what he wanted, more than he’d ever wanted anything.

The bathroom door creaked open, and Price emerged, towelling his hair. He’d discarded his usual gear in favour of an old grey t-shirt, soft and worn, that clung to his still-damp skin. He looked… ordinary. Beautifully ordinary. Ordinary was the wrong word entirely for that man, Ghost realised, because there was something extraordinary in the way Price took up space, in how naturally he filled the room."

38: Talk about a review that made your day.

OOO this was somehow even harder omg i love every comment or tag i get they all bring me immense joy, even if its just a bunch of emojis i love it thank you <33 but i will say that these in particular made my day as it was an absolute mess of a day and i was really doubting everything; about to delete said story but @nekrosmos the angel that he is dropped this in the tags and so did @jgvfhl (excuse the light-mode my desktop for some reason decided its in light-mode lol) and it made me literally light up and altered my brain chemistry for that whole day so thank you both genuinely <33 and sorry for the random tag whoops

[yurozo]

ali, angel, light of my life:

💖, 🏅, and 🧠 for the ask game!!

vi, my love, my sunshine, my erato. the carlos pic makes me visibly giggle at work in front of a customer

what do you like most about your own writing? i like to think i have nice prose! i'm a yapper to my core, and i need to set a specific mood and vibe for each piece, so i think it's the flexibility in my description that i really like about myself. maybe also dialogue? but only for certain characters

what is something you recently felt proud of in regard to your writing (finished a fic, actually planned for once, etc). honestly, just getting the balls to finally post my writing online. s/o to the many amazing re writers ive been stalking for months for inspiring me. i've been writing for a long while, but i was always scared of letting anyone else see it, so i'm very happy to have a nice lil community here! (also writing the monomyth still is my magnum opus. writing sex is so hard.)

what’s an idea you have that you can’t quite call a WIP yet? i've been studying 18th century literature for a good couple months now, and i so badly want to write a time/prose-accurate amorous fiction about leon. its just been swimming in my headspace but i havent written anything for it yet. maybe based off fantomina?

[estrophore]

Signalis Post (barely coherent thought vomit)

So I finished signalis on Monday and i think ive just about recovered enough for me to make a gush post about it on tumblr dot com, which i think i have to do cause i dont think any other game has really hit me as hard as this one. Spoilers obvs.

Being pre-transion, with that associated depression and closing off from oneself, ive always found it difficult to get out my feelings, even in private with just myself, and yet signalis has filled me throughout with its beautiful romantic melancholy and left me genuinely sobbing for the gay robot and her space girlfriend (almost worried that if id played this game on estrogen it might actually have just killed me on the spot). the only other times i can think of where i really cried were playing We Know The Devil near the beginning of the year, which really fkin hit the part of me that struggles to accept myself, and that time i rewatched the last episode of she-ra after reading the ‘Word War Etheria’ fanfic, which brings the characters so much more to life i fell for them all over again.

Signalis is a game that calls back to a lot of classic horror like resident evil and silent hill, which i havent got round to playing any of yet, but i think nostalgia works both ways sometimes and i’ll be playing them sooner now. sometimes horror gets stereotyped as all death and violence, some games fill themselves with skulls and corpses, and big ugly monsters and basically shout ‘DEATH!’ in your face repeatedly and it all just comes off as a bit garish and ridiculous and not actually very scary really. Signalis sits at the other end of that scale (with some of my other fav horror games like soma, cry of fear) where its environs are most usually just… quiet. Still. Muffled. Sad. just as often as theres tension or creeping fear because of this i find theres a strange kind of comfort too. Maybe its just that in most other genres of games theres so much of music, UI elements, pickups and interactibles with vibrant design. Here, theres room for your mind to just occupy the space. A soft fog. A dimly lit room. An empty train. Snow out a window. Liminal spaces that dont expect anything from you.

Signalis is a game thats just simply, unapologetically gay, and i dont think i would have been quite so invested in Elster and Ariane’s relationship if they were a straight couple. Its why representation is important, if art’s way for us to explore our emotions then its important to have media that we can relate to. Even Adler’s role isnt typically masculine. Our replika characters are manufactured, designed for certain roles in the base. Notes from the tough Stars and Storchs in the shooting range, the dollish Eules with the fairy lights and music player in the dorm. I couldnt help but think of groups of Eules sat around chatting, together, and im yearning for that feeling of togetherness, of understanding a friend that closely. I somehow missed the couple in the mineshaft (next playthough, ill find you v_v ). Despite the harshness of life in the Eusan nation (especially for the gestalts) the characters in it are defined by their feelings of belonging and hope. With the obvious parallels to east germany, i think of posters of cosmonauts and space travel from the time. Propaganda, sure but also made with the genuine belief in something greater. When the events of the game take this away, well, we find the last Kolibri, whod rather lose herself than lose her [ah. Im not sure theres a word here to properly describe the relationship they embody]. Its a game defined by loneliness.

We dont lie up at night scared by some corrupted android. We arent stuck with horror at the flesh everywhere, not on its own. We lie awake thinking about Elster and Ariane’s love for each other, the horror of their decline, the futility of trying to hold on forever. Its existential horror done perfectly. It shows an ending postponed and stretched far beyond its limits, and so squarely reminds you that you do, in fact, have to die one day. You’ll break down. One day you’ll say your last words to the people you love and you wont even know you have. Ariane’s final few diaries arrive with the full force of the narrative behind it, like a spear through my heart. For the record, I got the promise ending. Im still sad. It's a game about raging desperately against an unfair ending. I might think about this game for the rest of my life. I would sincerely say its an artistic masterpiece, by the sure definition of video games as art.

I like that the story leaves a lot open and abstract. I think it makes the emotional themes takes centre stage more. And i havent had nearly enough time to sift through it and come up with my own takes, we’ll need a few more playthroughs for that. And theres so much more to say that cant go in just these few paragraphs! Signalis is a game about two girls who had to run away from everything to find someone they belonged with. The universe may be cold and bleak, but you have to try, you might just find something beautiful, even if it doesnt last forever. I think if anything, we should all have the chance to find love and happiness like that, and we shouldnt have abandon a world that doesnt work for us to do it.