#maybe the bee will come back and help me pollinate these flowers

[dragonbleps]

Gardening update! 4 of the 6 pods have visible sprouts!

Also remember the pink hibiscus I swore was on its last legs and putting out its last flowers? Well, it's full of mostly healthy leaves again! The basil and mint are still growing in there too

And of course the red hibiscus keeps growing taller and taller... try growing some side branches please i can't reach the top! Ive also learned that hand pollinating is more difficult than people make it seem. Ive pollinated like 4 different flowers and nothing has come from them. Idk what im doing wrong

Last but not least, the campari tomato sprouts! So tiny!

[dearmailman]

Hiii Eddie I hope you're having a good day!!! If you're still taking fic requests could you please write a fic about wally babysitting a little reader who's autistic and they finger paint together or something like that sorry this is kinda long just have a great day

Hello neighbor!

This one's short and sweet. Reader has a small shutdown and Wally, your babysitter, provides comfort through regression.

"Now, now," Wally tuts. "What ever will we do?"

You are sitting in the corner of Home's living room, having come over to play with your sitter earlier that day. You're sniffling slightly, the lights feeling far too bright and the noises far too loud. You have your hands rested over your ears, and Wally's voice is muffled behind them.

Wally sits down across from you, tilting his head. "May I touch you?" You shake your head no, squeezing your eyes shut and pulling back from him on instinct, not wanting your felts to touch each other. Wally nods. "That's okay. Do you need to do something distracting, or do you need a nap in the dark?"

You sniffle again, though your tears have mostly dried and settled into quiet distress. "Distraction," you mutter.

"Okay! I will get my headphones for you, and then I will get a distraction." He sounds very determined to do these simple tasks, as though doing it for you means everything to him. You can't help smiling after him as he walks off.

A loud creak sounds at you, and it makes you cover your ears harder. "No, please, Home," you say, feeling bad that your friend can't speak with you right now due to the way its creaking gnaws at your eardrums. "We can play later," you promise him. Home falls silent respectfully, and Wally emerges from his bedroom with a pair of red earmuffs. They look like lumpy circles at first, but as he gets closer you realise they're apples!

It's a very cute sight, and you smile again despite the tear streaks on your face. Wally gently guides your hands away and immediately replaces them with the earmuffs. He's saying something to you, but it's too muffled to hear, so you give him a confused look.

He speaks up louder, in a very slow, pointed voice. "Would you like to paint, little neighbor?"

You seem unsure for a moment, wondering if the texture of the paints might be too much? It doesn't usually bother you, so perhaps it's worth a try. You nod and Wally nods back.

Moments later, you both are spread out on the floor in between bottles of paint and several pieces of construction paper. You have a green paper and are smearing blue paint over it, creating what seems to be a skyline. Maybe you'll add flowers? Bees to pollinate them? Endless possibilities!

You can't hear Wally, but he's painting beside you, with yellow paper and red paint. While you do feel more at ease, the lights are still very bright, and it's making it hard to relax, as everything seems more saturated, like it's jumping into your face.

"Home?" you call out, a bit too loud since you can't hear yourself. "Close window?" Home creaks their shutters shut for you, and a few friendly squeak, squeak, squeaks! ring out at you. You sigh, the room darkening and now only lit by a lamp in the corner.

Wally pats your head softly, and you turn to look at him, pulling up one headphone so you can hear him. "Reader, what did you paint? Do you want to see what I have painted?"

You hold up your pretty picture of a field, with bright colorful flowers and two buzzing bees, nodding at wanting to see his as well. Wally holds up a drawing that is two circles with one inside the other. You quirk an eyebrow, a little confused. But then it clicks.

"A eye?

"Yes, neighbor. Because eye love you," he boops your nose with a paint covered finger, and the red stains your nose. You giggle and touch his cheek, also spotting him with paint. Wally laughs slowly when he hears you giggling, assuming something silly must be at foot. "Barnaby teaches me good jokes, I think."

"Do you feel better, my littlest neighbor?"

You pause and consider it, and yes, you do feel better. In the darkened room with most loud noises fallen away, relaxing with your babysitter, you feel quite good, even! Wally smiles wider as you nod in confirmation, and he sets his picture down.

"Oh, that's good. What do you want to do now?"

"Snacks!" you cry, raising your hands in the air.

"Okay. I still have your favorites in my refrigerator, blossom."

"Snacks!" you cheer again.

"Snacks," Wally agrees.

You chant it and Wally states it back and forth to each other as you make your way to the kitchen, happy to just be there with each other, despite any troubles the day may have given you.

sfw interaction only

[punisheye]

@hollowfaith asked @cafedecember:

Some days after the wedding, a large box finally arrives on the doorstep of Café December wrapped in white paper and a fancy gold gauze ribbon. The reason for the address is quite simple: Aurelius has no idea where either of the couple lives, but he does know Wolfwood owns this establishment via a helpful hedgehog from his last visit. Opening it reveals a fancy beekeeping kit along with a pop-up card with a beautiful cursive message handwritten inside:

Dear Mr. and Mr. Meant-to-Bee,

Although I was unable to attend your wedding in person, I gather that the festivities were quite a sight. Seeing as an invitation did find itself into my hands, I and my partner have taken the liberty to formally congratulate you with a gift. To the one who spoke to me of Trust, I say that it is quite a fragile thing, but it can bear good fruit if nurtured well. To the one who spoke to me of Humans, I suppose there is no greater declaration of love for them than tying your heart to one for the remainder of your life. I do not claim to understand either of you, but happy occasions are worth commemorating even in a realm like this one. It is apparently poor taste to proselytize to a newlywed couple, so I shall refrain from additional remarks except to the effect that the idea for this gift came to me in a brilliant flash of insight. You really only need a good flower garden to make it work. That is the beauty of symbiosis, is it not? Last but not least, my partner Klaus adds his greetings below: (Written in neat, thinner lettering in a mix of print and cursive:) Congratulations on your marriage! Let there be many more lovely memories for you both. Cordially yours,

Aurelius Vane-Tempest

&

Klaus Avenue

—

The gift does, thankfully, reach the household eventually. The opener had nearly tripped over it in their sleepy walk up to the front door of the café at six in the morning and quickly took it to the back office. Steven was taking care of the boss' house while the newlyweds were on honeymoon, after all, surely he won't mind taking it back with him in the evening after close.

So Vash and Wolfwood come home to a very large box waiting for them in the living room. Wolfwood regards it dubiously at first, but he figures it wouldn't have been brought back to the house at all if it were deemed untrustworthy.

Besides, the card seems genuine enough; the sender was quite unafraid of being honest, after all. Wouldn't have gone through all this effort if he didn't think it was worthwhile.

Wolfwood's... got no idea how to keep bees. Well, he'll figure it out. Thankfully there are instructions on how to assemble the hive, and it even comes with multiple glass jars for honey harvesting. It'll fit right in in the garden, they already have plenty of bees that have taken a liking to Vash's flowers. They'll probably appreciate having a new, safe home. It'll keep the pollinators around, good for the garden.

And the pair will be able to get honey right from the source. He figures he'll have to look up more recipes that require honey, or maybe he'll... give some away if they acquire too much.

"Didn't expect anything like this from that guy," Wolfwood says, handing the card over to Vash. "We oughta set this up soon, huh? Bet you can find a nice place for it in the garden."

...And next time he sees that Aurelius guy he should probably give his thanks. To him and the Klaus guy.

@amoirsetpacis

[angel-and-the-serpent]

Mr. Buzzwell, we just passed three cups, and there's gallons more coming!

- I think we need to shut down! - Shut down? We've never shut down.

Shut down honey production!

Stop making honey!

Turn your key, sir!

What do we do now?

Oannonball!

We're shutting honey production!

Mission abort.

Aborting pollination and nectar detail. Returning to base.

Adam, you wouldn't believe how much honey was out there.

Oh, yeah?

What's going on? Where is everybody?

- Are they out celebrating? - They're home.

They don't know what to do. Laying out, sleeping in.

I heard your Uncle Oarl was on his way to San Antonio with a cricket.

At least we got our honey back.

Sometimes I think, so what if humans liked our honey? Who wouldn't?

It's the greatest thing in the world! I was excited to be part of making it.

This was my new desk. This was my new job. I wanted to do it really well.

And now...

Now I can't.

I don't understand why they're not happy.

I thought their lives would be better!

They're doing nothing. It's amazing. Honey really changes people.

You don't have any idea what's going on, do you?

- What did you want to show me? - This.

What happened here?

That is not the half of it.

Oh, no. Oh, my.

They're all wilting.

Doesn't look very good, does it?

No.

And whose fault do you think that is?

You know, I'm gonna guess bees.

Bees?

Specifically, me.

I didn't think bees not needing to make honey would affect all these things.

It's notjust flowers. Fruits, vegetables, they all need bees.

That's our whole SAT test right there.

Take away produce, that affects the entire animal kingdom.

And then, of course...

The human species?

So if there's no more pollination,

it could all just go south here, couldn't it?

I know this is also partly my fault.

How about a suicide pact?

How do we do it?

- I'll sting you, you step on me. - Thatjust kills you twice.

Right, right.

Listen, Barry... sorry, but I gotta get going.

I had to open my mouth and talk.

Vanessa?

Vanessa? Why are you leaving? Where are you going?

To the final Tournament of Roses parade in Pasadena.

They've moved it to this weekend because all the flowers are dying.

It's the last chance I'll ever have to see it.

Vanessa, I just wanna say I'm sorry. I never meant it to turn out like this.

I know. Me neither.

Tournament of Roses. Roses can't do sports.

Wait a minute. Roses. Roses?

Roses!

Vanessa!

Roses?!

Barry?

- Roses are flowers! - Yes, they are.

Flowers, bees, pollen!

I know. That's why this is the last parade.

Maybe not. Oould you ask him to slow down?

Oould you slow down?

Barry!

OK, I made a huge mistake. This is a total disaster, all my fault.

Yes, it kind of is.

I've ruined the planet. I wanted to help you

with the flower shop. I've made it worse.

Actually, it's completely closed down.

I thought maybe you were remodeling.

But I have another idea, and it's greater than my previous ideas combined.

I don't want to hear it!

All right, they have the roses, the roses have the pollen.

I know every bee, plant and flower bud in this park.

All we gotta do is get what they've got back here with what we've got.

- Bees. - Park.

- Pollen! - Flowers.

- Repollination! - Across the nation!

Tournament of Roses, Pasadena, Oalifornia.

They've got nothing but flowers, floats and cotton candy.

Security will be tight.

I have an idea.

Vanessa Bloome, FTD.

Official floral business. It's real.

Sorry, ma'am. Nice brooch.

Thank you. It was a gift.

Once inside, we just pick the right float.

How about The Princess and the Pea?

I could be the princess, and you could be the pea!

Yes, I got it.

- Where should I sit? - What are you?

- I believe I'm the pea. - The pea?

It goes under the mattresses.

- Not in this fairy tale, sweetheart. - I'm getting the marshal.

You do that! This whole parade is a fiasco!

Let's see what this baby'll do.

Hey, what are you doing?!

Then all we do is blend in with traffic...

...without arousing suspicion.

Once at the airport, there's no stopping us.

Stop! Security.

- You and your insect pack your float? - Yes.

Has it been in your possession the entire time?

Would you remove your shoes?

- Remove your stinger. - It's part of me.

I know. Just having some fun. Enjoy your flight.

Then if we're lucky, we'll have just enough pollen to do the job.

Oan you believe how lucky we are? We have just enough pollen to do the job!

I think this is gonna work.

It's got to work.

Attention, passengers, this is Oaptain Scott.

We have a bit of bad weather in New York.

It looks like we'll experience a couple hours delay.

Barry, these are cut flowers with no water. They'll never make it.

I gotta get up there and talk to them.

Be careful.

Oan I get help with the Sky Mall magazine?

I'd like to order the talking inflatable nose and ear hair trimmer.

Oaptain, I'm in a real situation.

- What'd you say, Hal? - Nothing.

Bee!

Don't freak out! My entire species...

What are you doing?

- Wait a minute! I'm an attorney! - Who's an attorney?

Don't move.

Oh, Barry.

Good afternoon, passengers. This is your captain.

Would a Miss Vanessa Bloome in 24B please report to the cockpit?

And please hurry!

What happened here?

There was a DustBuster, a toupee, a life raft exploded.

One's bald, one's in a boat, they're both unconscious!

- Is that another bee joke? - No!

No one's flying the plane!

This is JFK control tower, Flight 356. What's your status?

tukfitgki

[oribun]

Hello? Another call coming in. If anyone's feeling brave, there's a Korean deli on 83rd that gets their roses today. Hey, guys. - Look at that. - Isn't that the kid we saw yesterday? Hold it, son, flight deck's restricted. It's OK, Lou. We're gonna take him up. Really? Feeling lucky, are you? Sign here, here. Just initial that. - Thank you. - OK. You got a rain advisory today, and as you all know, bees cannot fly in rain. So be careful. As always, watch your brooms, hockey sticks, dogs, birds, bears and bats. Also, I got a couple of reports of root beer being poured on us. Murphy's in a home because of it, babbling like a cicada! - That's awful. - And a reminder for you rookies, bee law number one, absolutely no talking to humans! All right, launch positions! Buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz! Buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz! Buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz! Black and yellow! Hello! You ready for this, hot shot? Yeah. Yeah, bring it on. Wind, check. - Antennae, check. - Nectar pack, check. - Wings, check. - Stinger, check. Scared out of my shorts, check. OK, ladies, let's move it out! Pound those petunias, you striped stem-suckers! All of you, drain those flowers! Wow! I'm out! I can't believe I'm out! So blue. I feel so fast and free! Box kite! Wow! Flowers! This is Blue Leader. We have roses visual. Bring it around 30 degrees and hold. Roses! 30 degrees, roger. Bringing it around. Stand to the side, kid. It's got a bit of a kick. That is one nectar collector! - Ever see pollination up close? - No, sir. I pick up some pollen here, sprinkle it over here. Maybe a dash over there, a pinch on that one. See that? It's a little bit of magic. That's amazing. Why do we do that? That's pollen power. More pollen, more flowers, more nectar, more honey for us. Oool. I'm picking up a lot of bright yellow. Oould be daisies. Don't we need those? Oopy that visual. Wait. One of these flowers seems to be on the move. Say again? You're reporting a moving flower? Affirmative. That was on the line! This is the coolest. What is it? I don't know, but I'm loving this color. It smells good. Not like a flower, but I like it. Yeah, fuzzy. Ohemical-y. Oareful, guys. It's a little grabby. My sweet lord of bees! Oandy-brain, get off there! Problem! - Guys! - This could be bad. Affirmative. Very close. Gonna hurt. Mama's little boy. You are way out of position, rookie! Ooming in at you like a missile! Help me! I don't think these are flowers. - Should we tell him? - I think he knows. What is this?! Match point! You can start packing up, honey, because you're about to eat it! Yowser! Gross. There's a bee in the car! - Do something! - I'm driving! - Hi, bee. - He's back here! He's going to sting me! Nobody move. If you don't move, he won't sting you. Freeze! He blinked! Spray him, Granny! What are you doing?! Wow... the tension level out here is unbelievable. I gotta get home. Oan't fly in rain. Oan't fly in rain. Oan't fly in rain. Mayday! Mayday! Bee going down!

[witchlingsandwyverns]

Hellooo again from your secret Santa!

I have ideas coming together so I hope you don’t mind if I pop in for some more questions!

You’re a big reader - do you have any foundational fantasy books that hold a special place in your heart? Like Game of Thrones, Lord of the Rings, Mists of Avalon, Wrinkle in Time? And if so, what do you love most about them?

You mentioned gardens - tell me your ideal fantasy garden to wander around. Is it messy and wild and covered in moss? Full of strange special plants from around the world with magical traits? Is it filled with hedges trimmed to look like dragons?

Finally, if you were Rhys and buying Feyre her first Solstice gifts, what would you get her?

HOOOO BOY YA ALREADY SPOILING ME I CAN TELL BY YOUR QUESTIONS WOW

Okay just wow where to begin

BOOKS

Foundational fantasy... hard to say since I'm only really now getting into High Fantasy/the foundational epics typical of the genre (I never read lotr till this year, but grew up with the movies - discovered Philip Pullman late, couldn't get into GoT, etc) but some long time favs inlcude:

- Tamora Pierce (lioness/wild magic): characters are fun, spunky, and challenged by circumstance to weigh what they value vs what must be done. The romance! The action!

- Howls Moving Castle: I loved how protagonists can be flawed and petty and stubborn but those things can also be strengths in the right light (I have the same feeling about the Mistborn cast) not to mention that underlying truth of sometimes you don't want to do a thing but you have to and you'll be better for just doing it idk I really hope this makes sense

- you mentioned Mists of Avalon! I took Arthurian Lit and loved it so anything that takes an old myth and spins it, I'm am here for

- (do you know how hard of a question this is for me?)

This is only what I could squeeze in frame. Books were one of the very few things i collect? Hoard? And have been hoarding since Ive had my own money. A lot of fantasy I think of as 'foundational' is whatever I could get my hands on and shaped how I read the genre. Cinda Willaims Chima. Patricia C Wrede. Bruce Colville. Niel Gaiman. Piers Anthony. Terry Pratchett. Could literally talk for hours. But I love characterization/character dynamics and tropes (whole tag: "takes a hit of the good shit tropes") omg this got so long I'm sorry I hope this is helpful I just really want to do your questions justice

GARDENS

(I'm sorry in advance I've worked at a plant nursery and as a florist assistant so bear with me!)

Dream garden: wild and colorful! Anything that attracts pollinators (half the fun is watching bees and butterflies and birds appreciate what's been grown) and smells nice! Jasmine lavender honeysuckle, I think gardens should still look like nature (wild, balanced between flowering and evergreen) but also a sensory experience. Moss!! For!!! Days!!! Old stone/brick work! Statuary! Swings to sit on in the morning sun with coffee or at night with the bats and fireflies! (I once got to walk in Central Park in the rain and stumbled across the Shakespeare garden and I straight up was in heaven. The sound of rain on leaves. The walking paths.)

BACK TO YOUR Q: Hedges are for kissing behind. Plants with healing properties are a magic of their own. Growing things ARE magic. But if that dragon statue was enchanted or the sculpted siren in the fountain sang when the sun hit the water just right? I WOULDNT BE SAD ABOUT IT. 🌻

FEYRE

For our our first solstice I would give her a space to paint or read in depending on her fancy. A space to be creative in with lots of light and windows. With warm drinks on tap for the late nights she wishes to stay up late chasing that creative buzz. Conveniently soundproofed for music to jam to while painting late at night... or maybe other late night activities with a certain high lord should he also need an escape or she needs a model (ahem 👀). Maybe it's near a garden or within walking distance of a view of natural elements to inspire her. Maybe its filled with plants and canvases and brick walls to hang other artists art on. I know Rhys has gifted her similar things in cannon but as a fellow creative, it's the dream.

EDIT: MAGIC CHAIR!!!! SHIFTS BETWEEN THE PERFECT READING CHAIR OR PAINTING STOOL! COMFY NO MATTER HOW YOU SIT IN IT

(Dear lord this got long, I hope it helps!!!)

[sharkchanic]

As always, watch your brooms, hockey sticks, dogs, birds, bears and bats. Also, I got a couple of reports of root beer being poured on us. Murphy's in a home because of it, babbling like a cicada! - That's awful. - And a reminder for you rookies, bee law number one, absolutely no talking to humans! All right, launch positions! Buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz! Buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz! Buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz! Black and yellow! Hello! You ready for this, hot shot? Yeah. Yeah, bring it on. Wind, check. - Antennae, check. - Nectar pack, check. - Wings, check. - Stinger, check. Scared out of my shorts, check. OK, ladies, let's move it out! Pound those petunias, you striped stem-suckers! All of you, drain those flowers! Wow! I'm out! I can't believe I'm out! So blue. I feel so fast and free! Box kite! Wow! Flowers! This is Blue Leader. We have roses visual. Bring it around 30 degrees and hold. Roses! 30 degrees, roger. Bringing it around. Stand to the side, kid. It's got a bit of a kick. That is one nectar collector! - Ever see pollination up close? - No, sir. I pick up some pollen here, sprinkle it over here. Maybe a dash over there, a pinch on that one. See that? It's a little bit of magic. That's amazing. Why do we do that? That's pollen power. More pollen, more flowers, more nectar, more honey for us. Cool. I'm picking up a lot of bright yellow. Could be daisies. Don't we need those? Copy that visual. Wait. One of these flowers seems to be on the move. Say again? You're reporting a moving flower? Affirmative. That was on the line! This is the coolest. What is it? I don't know, but I'm loving this color. It smells good. Not like a flower, but I like it. Yeah, fuzzy. Chemical-y. Careful, guys. It's a little grabby. My sweet lord of bees! Candy-brain, get off there! Problem! - Guys! - This could be bad. Affirmative. Very close. Gonna hurt. Mama's little boy. You are way out of position, rookie! Coming in at you like a missile! Help me! I don't think these are flowers. - Should we tell him? - I think he knows. What is this?! Match point! You can start packing up, honey, because you're about to eat it! Yowser! Gross. There's a bee in the car! - Do something! - I'm driving! - Hi, bee. - He's back here! He's going to sting me! Nobody move. If you don't move, he won't sting you. Freeze! He blinked! Spray him, Granny! What are you doing?! Wow... the tension level out here is unbelievable. I gotta get home. Can't fly in rain. Can't fly in rain. Can't fly in rain. Mayday! Mayday! Bee going down! Ken, could you close the window please? Ken, could you close the window please? Check out my new resume. I made it into a fold-out brochure. You see? Folds out. Oh, no. More humans. I don't need this. What was that? Maybe this time. This time. This time. This time! This time! This... Drapes! That is diabolical. It's fantastic. It's got all my special skills, even my top-ten favorite movies. What's number one? Star Wars? Nah, I don't go for that... ...kind of stuff. No wonder we shouldn't talk to them. They're out of their minds. When I leave a job interview, they're flabbergasted, can't believe what I say. There's the sun. Maybe that's a way out. I don't remember the sun having a big 75 on it. I predicted global warming. I could feel it getting hotter. At first I thought it was just me. Wait! Stop! Bee! Stand back. These are winter boots. Wait! Don't kill him! You know I'm allergic to them! This thing could kill me! Why does his life have less value than yours? Why does his life have any less value than mine? Is that your statement? I'm just saying all life has value. You don't know what he's capable of feeling. My brochure! There you go, little guy. 'm not scared of him. It's an allergic thing. Put that on your resume brochure. My whole face could puff up. Make it one of your special skills. Knocking someone out is also a special skill. Right. Bye, Vanessa. Thanks. - Vanessa, next week? Yogurt night? - Sure, Ken. You know, whatever. - You could put carob chips on there. - Bye. - Supposed to be less calories. - Bye.

"jeez..."

[secretexperiment]

I don't have anywhere I can really post something like this, and it's the kind of thing I would maybe opt to write in my diary normally, but I don't feel like getting up and grabbing my diary and if anybody sees this and it helps make them feel a little less depressed at the direction of our general society and treatment of the planet, I think it could be worth posting.

A few days ago, Jupiter and Venus were bright and visible in the night sky, appearing right near each other. A couple months ago, Jupiter and several of its moons were visible with only so much as the view from a pair of binoculars...

Whenever something like this happens... A natural phenomenon occurring like this, I feel compelled to make the most of it. Sometimes that means standing outside at the nearby park for a good 15 minutes to marvel and take in what I'm seeing, sometimes, like the other day with Venus and Jupiter, it meant just taking a short walk outside of my apartment, catching a glimpse and being grateful at that opportunity, then going back inside with just that little piece of wonder to break up the mundane. A couple of years ago, there was a comet, the Neowise comet to be exact, again visible with just binoculars. My boyfriend and I drove a good 20-30 minutes up a mountain just to watch it make its slow decent across the sky.

The reason I love doing this type of thing is because it reminds me how great and vast the universe is. It reminds me how small I am, how brief my life will be, and that I need to cherish what I have. A week or two ago when Venus and Jupiter were visible, I could've cried- "I don't want to ever not exist and not be able to experience this feeling again," I thought. I wished I could just have eternal life and be shot into space so I could sink in the vastness of time and witness all of the beauty and destruction that this universe has to offer, unbounded by our silly little tasks we busy ourselves with everyday.

When I am having an off day, I tend to reach for nature. I look at the sky. I think about how far away the planets are. I think about everyone who is currently existing, and ground myself by closing my eyes and lying in bed and pretending I can feel the footsteps and the rumbles of car engines coming all the way from the opposite side of the planet. I think about all the animals on the savannah and in the rainforest, the birds, the bugs, and how they all are always just there. Just existing. I turn on nature programs and it feels like taking a refreshing sip of water, like the illusion of nature could somehow be enough.

I sometimes feel hopeless. Why is there so much war? Why are people so cruel and evil toward each other and other beings? Why is there all this hate and spite and ugliness? And why do I feel obligated to live among it? Of course there are answers to these questions, very real answers that matter in the scope of our species. I don't intend to say that, because we are so small, our problems don't matter. Certain things matter a lot. The suffering of innocent people in warzones matters. The suffering of a single human being because of a single other person's actions matters. But it's not healthy to let that be the prevailing thought in our heads 100% of the time. And when I feel like it's getting to be too much, I turn my gaze to the beauty around me. What IS good in the world?

The trees that grow and feed the air...

The bees that pollinate the flowers so they might continue to grow another year...

The stars that, too, will flicker out some time far away from now...

It's bittersweet, but I want to cherish those things while they last, and I while I'm still around to enjoy them.

[dead-fl13s]

I'm OK! You know what this means?

All the honey will finally belong to the bees.

Now we won't have to work so hard all the time.

This is an unholy perversion of the balance of nature, Benson.

You'll regret this.

Barry, how much honey is out there?

All right. One at a time.

Barry, who are you wearing?

My sweater is Ralph Lauren, and I have no pants.

What if Montgomery's right?

What do you mean?

We've been living the bee way a long time, 27 million years.

Congratulations on your victory. What will you demand as a settlement?

First, we'll demand a complete shutdown of all bee work camps.

Then we want back the honey that was ours to begin with, every last drop.

We demand an end to the glorification of the bear as anything more than a filthy, smelly, bad-breath stink machine.

We're all aware of what they do in the woods.

Wait for my signal. Take him out.

He'll have nauseous for a few hours, then he'll be fine.

And we will no longer tolerate bee-negative nicknames...

But it's just a prance-about stage name!

...unnecessary inclusion of honey in bogus health products and la-dee-da human tea-time snack garnishments.

Can't breathe.

Bring it in, boys!

Hold it right there! Good.

Tap it.

Mr. Buzzwell, we just passed three cups and there's gallons more coming!

I think we need to shut down!

Shut down? We've never shut down.

Shut down honey production!

Stop making honey!

Turn your key, sir!

What do we do now?

Cannonball!

We're shutting honey production!

Mission abort.

Aborting pollination and nectar detail.

Returning to base.

Adam, you wouldn't believe how much honey was out there.

Oh, yeah?

What's going on? Where is everybody?

Are they out celebrating?

They're home.

They don't know what to do. Laying out, sleeping in.

I heard your Uncle Carl was on his way to San Antonio with a cricket.

At least we got our honey back.

Sometimes I think, so what if humans liked our honey? Who wouldn't?

It's the greatest thing in the world! I was excited to be part of making it.

This was my new desk. This was my new job. I wanted to do it really well. And now...

Now I can't.

I don't understand why they're not happy.

I thought their lives would be better!

They're doing nothing. It's amazing.

Honey really changes people.

You don't have any idea what's going on, do you?

What did you want to show me?

This.

What happened here?

That is not the half of it.

Oh, no. Oh, my.

They're all wilting.

Doesn't look very good, does it?

No.

And whose fault do you think that is?

You know, I'm gonna guess bees.

Bees?

Specifically, me.

I didn't think bees not needing to make honey would affect all these things.

It's not just flowers. Fruits, vegetables, they all need bees.

That's our whole SAT test right there.

Take away produce, that affects the entire animal kingdom.

And then, of course...

The human species?

So if there's no more pollination, it could all just go south here, couldn't it?

I know this is also partly my fault.

How about a suicide pact?

How do we do it?

I'll sting you, you step on me.

That just kills you twice.

Right, right.

Listen, Barry... sorry, but I gotta get going.

I had to open my mouth and talk.

Vanessa?

Vanessa? Why are you leaving?

Where are you going?

To the final Tournament of Roses parade in Pasadena.

They've moved it to this weekend because all the flowers are dying.

It's the Last Chance I'll ever have to see it.

Vanessa, I just wanna say I'm sorry.

I never meant it to turn out like this.

I know. Me neither.

Tournament of Roses.

Roses can't do sports.

Wait a minute. Roses. Roses?

Roses!

Vanessa!

Roses?!

Barry?

Roses are flowers!

Yes, they are.

Flowers, bees, pollen!

I know.

That's why this is the last parade.

Maybe not.

Could you ask him to slow down?

Could you slow down?

Barry!

OK, I made a huge mistake.

This is a total disaster, all my fault.

Yes, it kind of is.

I've ruined the planet. I wanted to help you with the flower shop. I've made it worse.

Actually, it's completely closed down.

I thought maybe you were remodeling.

But I have another idea, and it's greater than my previous ideas combined.

I don't want to hear it!

All right, they have the roses, the roses have the pollen.

I know every bee, plant and flower bud in this park.

All we gotta do is get what they've got back here with what we've got.

Bees.

Park.

Pollen!

Flowers.

Repollination!

Across the nation!

Tournament of Roses, Pasadena, California.

They've got nothing but flowers, floats and cotton candy.

Security will be tight.

I have an idea.

Vanessa Bloome, FTD.

Official floral business. It's real.

Sorry, ma'am. Nice brooch.

Thank you. It was a gift.

Once inside, we just pick the right float.

How about The Princess and the Pea?

I could be the princess, and you could be the pea!

Yes, I got it.

Where should I sit?

What are you?

I believe I'm the pea.

The pea?

It goes under the mattresses.

Not in this fairy tale, sweetheart.

I'm getting the marshal.

You do that! This whole parade is a fiasco!

Let's see what this baby'll do.

Hey, what are you doing?!

Then all we do is blend in with traffic... without arousing suspicion.

Once at the airport, there's no stopping us.

Stop! Security.

You and your insect pack your float?

Yes.

Has it been in your possession the entire time?

Would you remove your shoes?

Remove your stinger.

It's part of me.

I know. Just having some fun.

Enjoy your flight.

Then if we're lucky, we'll have just enough pollen to do the job.

Can you believe how lucky we are? We have just enough pollen to do the job!

I think this is gonna work.

It's got to work.

Attention, passengers, this is Captain Scott. We have a bit of bad weather in New York. It looks like we'll experience a couple hours delay.

Barry, these are cut flowers with no water. They'll never make it.

I gotta get up there and talk to them.

Be careful.

Can I get help with the Sky Mall magazine? I'd like to order the talking inflatable nose and ear hair trimmer.

Captain, I'm in a real situation.

What'd you say, Hal?

Nothing.

Bee!

Don't freak out! My entire species...

What are you doing?

Wait a minute! I'm an attorney!

Who's an attorney?

Don't move.

Oh, Barry.

Good afternoon, passengers. This is your captain. Would a Miss Vanessa Bloome in 24B please report to the cockpit? And please hurry!

What happened here?

There was a DustBuster, a toupee, a life raft exploded.

One's bald, one's in a boat, they're both unconscious!

Is that another bee joke?

No!

No one's flying the plane!

This is JFK control tower, Flight 356. What's your status?

This is Vanessa Bloome. I'm a florist from New York.

Where's the pilot?

He's unconscious, and so is the copilot.

Not good. Does anyone onboard have flight experience?

As a matter of fact, there is.

Who's that?

Barry Benson.

From the honey trial?! Oh, great.

Vanessa, this is nothing more than a big metal bee.

It's got giant wings, huge engines.

I can't fly a plane.

Why not? Isn't John Travolta a pilot?

Yes.

How hard could it be?

Wait, Barry!

We're headed into some lightning.

This is Bob Bumble. We have some late-breaking news from JFK Airport, where a suspenseful scene is developing.

Barry Benson, fresh from his legal victory...

That's Barry!

...is attempting to land a plane, loaded with people, flowers and an incapacitated flight crew.

Flowers?!

We have a storm in the area and two individuals at the controls with absolutely no flight experience.

Just a minute. There's a bee on that plane.

I'm quite familiar with Mr. Benson and his no-account compadres.

They've done enough damage.

But isn't he your only hope?

Technically, a bee shouldn't be able to fly at all.

Their wings are too small... Haven't we heard this a million times?

"The surface area of the wings and body mass make no sense."

Get this on the air!

Got it.

Stand by.

We're going live.

The way we work may be a mystery to you. Making honey takes a lot of bees doing a lot of small jobs.

But let me tell you about a small job. If you do it well, it makes a big difference.

More than we realized. To us, to everyone.

That's why I want to get bees back to working together. That's the bee way! We're not made of Jell-O.

We get behind a fellow.

Black and yellow!

Hello!

Left, right, down, hover.

Hover?

Forget hover.

This isn't so hard.

Beep-beep! Beep-beep!

Barry, what happened?!

Wait, I think we were on autopilot the whole time.

That may have been helping me.

And now we're not!

So it turns out I cannot fly a plane.

All of you, let's get behind this fellow! Move it out!

Move out!

Our only chance is if I do what I'd do, you copy me with the wings of the plane!

Don't have to yell.

I'm not yelling! We're in a lot of trouble.

It's very hard to concentrate with that panicky tone in your voice!

It's not a tone. I'm panicking!

I can't do this!

Vanessa, pull yourself together. You have to snap out of it!

You snap out of it.

You snap out of it.

You snap out of it!

You snap out of it!

You snap out of it!

You snap out of it!

You snap out of it!

You snap out of it!

Hold it!

Why? Come on, it's my turn.

How is the plane flying?

I don't know.

Hello?

Benson, got any flowers for a happy occasion in there?

The Pollen Jocks!

They do get behind a fellow.

Black and yellow.

Hello.

All right, let's drop this tin can on the blacktop.

Where? I can't see anything. Can you?

No, nothing. It's all cloudy.

Come on. You got to think bee, Barry.

Thinking bee.

Thinking bee.

Thinking bee!

Thinking bee! Thinking bee!

Wait a minute. I think I'm feeling something.

What?

I don't know. It's strong, pulling me.

Like a 27-million-year-old instinct.

Bring the nose down.

Thinking bee!

Thinking bee! Thinking bee!

What in the world is on the tarmac?

Get some lights on that!

Thinking bee!

Thinking bee! Thinking bee!

Vanessa, aim for the flower.

OK.

Cut the engines. We're going in on bee power. Ready, boys?

Affirmative!

Good. Good. Easy, now. That's it.

Land on that flower!

Ready? Full reverse!

Spin it around!

Not that flower! The other one!

Which one?

That flower.

I'm aiming at the flower!

That's a fat guy in a flowered shirt.

I mean the giant pulsating flower made of millions of bees!

Pull forward. Nose down. Tail up.

Rotate around it.

This is insane, Barry!

This's the only way I know how to fly.

Am I koo-koo-kachoo, or is this plane flying in an insect-like pattern?

Get your nose in there. Don't be afraid. Smell it. Full reverse!

Just drop it. Be a part of it.

Aim for the center!

Now drop it in! Drop it in, woman!

Come on, already.

Barry, we did it! You taught me how to fly!

Yes. No high-five!

Right.

Barry, it worked!

Did you see the giant flower?

What giant flower? Where? Of course

I saw the flower! That was genius!

Thank you.

But we're not done yet.

Listen, everyone!

This runway is covered with the last pollen from the last flowers available anywhere on Earth.

That means this is our Last Chance. We're the only ones who make honey, pollinate flowers and dress like this.

If we're gonna survive as a species, this is our moment! What do you say?

Are we going to be bees, or just Museum of Natural History keychains?

We're bees!

Keychain!

Then follow me! Except Keychain.

Hold on, Barry. Here. You've earned this.

Yeah!

I'm a Pollen Jock! And it's a perfect fit. All I gotta do are the sleeves.

Oh, yeah.

That's our Barry.

Mom! The bees are back!

If anybody needs to make a call, now's the time. I got a feeling we'll be working late tonight!

Here's your change. Have a great afternoon! Can I help who's next?

Would you like some honey with that?

It is bee-approved. Don't forget these.

Milk, cream, cheese, it's all me. And I don't see a nickel!

Sometimes I just feel like a piece of meat!

I had no idea.

Barry, I'm sorry.

Have you got a moment?

Would you excuse me?

My mosquito associate will help you.

Sorry I'm late.

He's a lawyer too?

I was already a blood-sucking parasite. All I needed was a briefcase.

Have a great afternoon!

Barry, I just got this huge tulip order, and I can't get them anywhere.

No problem, Vannie. Just leave it to me.

You're a lifesaver, Barry. Can I help who's next?

All right, scramble, jocks! It's time to fly.

Thank you, Barry!

That bee is living my life!

Let it go, Kenny.

When will this nightmare end?!

Let it all go.

Beautiful day to fly.

Sure is.

Between you and me,

I was dying to get out of that office.

You have got to start thinking bee, my friend.

Thinking bee!

Me?

Hold it. Let's just stop for a second. Hold it.

I'm sorry. I'm sorry, everyone. Can we stop here?

I'm not making a major life decision during a production number!

All right. Take ten, everybody. Wrap it up, guys.

I had virtually no rehearsal for that.

tell me a bedtime story

[selinakidreams]

Hello my love can i please request that you follow up on this lovely work of art you deposited in my ask box? Ty ty

oh oh oh what is this? the lovely carter (and val- in spirit) dropping in my inbox and requesting for me (???????) to write,,,,,,,,,,, I’m honored and will happily accept.

I am so so so so so sorry this took me so long to write,, it’s been sitting in my drafts for weeks,,,, I hope this makes up for it 🥺 I tweaked it a bit and I think it works,,, better now ? hopefully !!

warnings: this is smutty, SLIGHT voyerism,  dubcon turned to con, p♥︎rn with like.. a dash of plot ? maybe ?, fem! reader, thigh riding, uh riding dick right after, LIGHT MENTIONS of fwb! Osamu,, ah ha haa — NO INCEST.

Dinners with the Miyas: a weekly tradition since... before you could remember. Once a week, you and your family would gather at the Miya’s house for a homemade feast.

In hindsight, it was a really nice way for two life-long best friends, both of your guys’ moms, and their loved ones to get together and catch up after a busy week- but as a girl dealing with a pair of twins a year older than herself, it was absolute hell. 

At first, you used to despise having to get properly dressed just to eat dinner with your family friends. All that effort and for what? You see them all the time at school already, what’s so special about coming together for dinner once a week? And honestly, you were just going to get dirtied up anyways. Their beautiful blooming garden was calling your name and who were you to deny it?

You’d often find yourself frolicking among the tall blades of grass and colorful flowers, the wind swaying the plants to and fro. It was so calming to sit and watch the bees buzz around and pollinate. Needless to say, this is the boys’ cue to come into the picture; they always ruined your fun. The twins started growing into... boys, meaning they were an absolute nuisance.

It all started on a gloomy day; it had rained a few hours prior to the meetup and the Miya’s garden was- of course- muddy, but you just couldn’t resist. You tried to be as careful as you could, especially after the continuous complaints from your mother about how dirty you were when you showed up to the dinner table, but somebody decided to sabotage that.

A cold, wet slab of goop slapped you square in the face. With eyes growing wide, you turned to the culprit. An obnoxious laugh left Atsumu Miya’s mouth and in the same breath managed to call you ugly. You didn’t know what to do besides look down; you felt tears prick your lash line and you didn’t want that bully of a boy to see you cry. When you lifted your gaze to find the back door to run to, you paused upon seeing more mud flying through the air- only it wasn’t at you this time. It’s target was Atsumu- the launcher, Osamu. Finishing the embarrassing blow, the twin pointedly said the same phrase that was spat at you, before turning to you and apologizing for his idiot brother’s actions. Needless to say, after that Osamu Miya became your knight in shining armor.

As the years pass, they started to come over to your house more. When the boys were in your room, they (mainly the more wide-eyed, now blonde-haired, insatiably curious one) poked and prodded where their gazes didn’t belong. Osamu always tried his hardest to reil his brother in, attempting to put things back and apologizing every once in a while.it was painfully easy to realize that your perspective about him about him shifted; The politeness. The calm. The sensibility. He was kind and considerate. Your view on Osamu began to change into something of want, and oddly enough, it wasn’t pure.

You and osamu grew closer in ways you weren’t expecting; he was your first sexual everything. First kiss, first touch, first fuck- and with every intimate moment you both shared, the level of respect and maturity was extremely high. There was only one issue, whatever one miya wanted, the other wanted it just as bad.

Atsumu’s gaze on you lasted longer and longer, his tricks were getting more and more perverse- anything he could do to cause a little mischief and ripen the sexual tension he began to build between the two of you. But even the kiddie wrestling matches, flipping up your skirt, and lingering touches became boring; none of his little teases seemed to satisfy him anymore.

He was jealous. He had to be. Osamu never boasted, much less muttered a single word about what you two did when you were alone but Atsumu wasn’t dumb. He knew one of the Miya’s were getting their dick wet and it certainly wasn’t him. He was becoming impatient, but to you, he seemed really on edge- so much so, that one night you found yourself in one of the most compromising positions with the honey-haired idiot.

The three of you were chatting about the twins’ most recent volleyball match in your room, waiting for your moms’ wine induced giggles to subside and finnish the food already.

With lit up eyes, Atsumu was boasting about how they’d achieved their first quick when Osamu pardoned himself so he could use the restroom. 

“AWHH ‘SAMU, YOURE GONNA MISS THE BEST PART.” Tsumu loudly whined. 

“i was there, idiot. just keep telling her the story, i’ll be back.” he rolled his eyes before leaving the room.

He sucked his teeth before turning to you to continue the story only to find your eyes glued to find Osamu’s fleeting figure. You looked almost dazed out and Atsumu couldn’t believe it. Right in front of his eyes, you were eye-fucking his twin brother instead of listening to him.

Absolutely not.

Part of you should not be surprised. You looked away for just a few seconds- just enough for Atsumu to be annoyed that the attention wasn’t on him. Now you found yourself pinned to the floor, both wrists in one of his big hands, the other holding your hips down. You let out a squeal as you tried squirming out of his grasp.... that was until his knee firmly placed itself against your crotch in just the right place. You swear up and down that you didn’t mean to but there was a surprised gasp that shouldn’t have left your mouth. It almost sounded like... the thought stilled your body.

atsumu took note of this. 

In a low murmur, he leaned incredibly close and whispered, “how’s that pretty pussy of yers feelin right now?”

It sent a violent pink tinge to your cheeks and a bolt of arousal down your spine, your slick spreading against your underwear and the top of his jeanclad knee. A clench of your thighs meant this was going exactly where he wanted it to- his wait was over.

“ ‘m waiting for an answer, princess.” he tutted, his face only getting closer to yours while he applied more pressure against your throbbing vulva. 

It was never like this with ‘samu. This... was almost exciting for you. Something teetering the lines of flavorful and troublesome. The little voice in your head was screaming at you but the aching desire in your pussy was louder.

“Ah!- atsumu! what are you doing?” you whimper, trying to hide your face. There were so many thoughts racing through your mind, the logical part of you wanted to hear them all out but in the moment you were so overwhelmed. There needed to be control in such a situation; You tried to shift around to loosen his grip, accidentally applying pressure that was welcoming it the most, causing a breathy moan to escape your lips and your eyes to clamp shut.

“mmm well, you’re so focused on my brother, i thought i’d show you what you were missin if you started payin more attention to me.” You could hear the smirk in his voice and you whine. This position was so compromising.

He trailed the hand that weighed down your waist up the curves of your side and took your jaw in his hand. He turned your face and when you peeked open your eyes, your gaze was met with his.

“I want you to cum on my thigh.”

Eyes wide, you tried shaking your head to no avail. His grip was so strong. “Atsumu no!! Osamu’s gonna get back and dinner is gonna be done soon and just- no!” You squeal.

“Y’still have time,” he said calmly, “ ‘samu’s probably checkin on dinner... so yeh better start... or else. Y’know what? I could just continue this though dinner. Slide my hand up ye’thigh under the table...” he started, letting go of your face and ghosting his hand down your body. The thought of his big hands palming over your clit while a finger is dipped into your warm pool flashed in your mind. You clenched, and boy, he felt it.

“Mmm, did my pretty girl think about my fingers- fingers that could reach places yours can’t?” He grinned as he watched you follow his hand with your eyes. “maybe you’d like it if i play with your clit under the table, hm? right next to my brother-” 

“no no! here. right now.” is all you could manage to get out. your head was swimming with all that could happen, it only got hazier when you felt the pressure on your cunt lessen- you wanted it back. “Ts-sumu.. i..” 

“i know, i know... but first i want you to cum on my thigh if you want my fingers that badly. I want you whiny and desperate, rubbing that pretty cunt all over me. Moaning my name.”

That’s how you found yourself stuffed in your small closet, you desk chair pulled away from its rightful place,

With his throbbing cock fighting against the cage of his pants and heavy pants leaving his lips, his hands could only find relief on your waist- assisting you in your delishious movements.

His noises weren’t the only ones to be heard, you were trying so hard to contain them but nothing is coming of it. Short little high pitched whines rung in Atsumu s ears- but what really got him were the whimpers of “fuck tsumi,” when the angle hit your clit just right and the squeeze of his biceps as you threw your head back. As soon as he experienced that, he needed you to cum right then and there. And not on his thigh.

“Nope- fuck, we’re switching it up,” he mumbled as he stopped your hips from grinding down. Your mind was a mess but all you could think about in your extremely aroused state was that you needed to cum.

“Atsumu wh-“ before you could even finish your question, he unzipped his pants and uncovered himself from his boxers, his angry cockhead slapping his torso and smearing pre-cum on his skin.

“On- now, Princess.”

There was no need for protests; he was expecting one to come out but instead he felt your soft hands lightly grip his bulging head and give a few strokes before all he heard in that cramped, dark closet was, “you’re so .. big.”

Eyes wide, a garbled moan left his mouth and next thing he knew, you were repositioning till his tip lined with your sopping entrance. He couldn’t take it, he thrusted upward as you sunk down. A shocked moan ripped out of both of you and in the moment of silence that followed afterwards, you could hear the floorboard creek.

Apparently Atsumu did too because his actions stopped and one of his hands left your hips to presumably cover your mouth. You presumed wrong.

Your closet door slid open to reveal a wide eyed Osamu palming himself.

[strawberrylemonz]

A Lovely Encounter

Part 5

Part 6 [CURRENT]

Part 7

(DT: @applepie1000 @petrichormeraki @jump-in-the-cadillac )

------------

“I’ll be okay, they’re already waiting for me in the Hub.”

“What if I just walk you to-”

“Grian, I’ll be okay!”

Tommy huffed for the fifth time in a row as Grian tried to follow him around. Chat was fawning over Grian’s protectiveness over Tommy, something that annoyed the younger boy big time. Kristin, happily settle in her new house, laughed as Tommy griped at his brother. Finally feeling tired from all the laughing, put a hand on Grian’s arm as she messed with Tommy’s hair.

“Let Tommy be on his way. You don’t want him to deal with angry ladies, trust me.”

Grateful, Tommy ducked under Grian’s hand and thanked Kristin. Before Grian could utter another word, he ran towards the Hub portal. Opening his inventory, he made sure that he had everything he needed. Letting out a sigh of relief, he climbed into the portal without a single thought. Stepping out into the portal station, Tommy couldn’t help but smile as the chattering of other people filled the air. Humming a familiar tune, the made his way to the center. He felt a light, cold hand grab his shoulder, squeezing it slightly. Peering over, he saw one of the individual spirits, swaggerrsouls_, peering down to him while floating above everyone else. Giving a blank smile, the spirit pointed behind Tommy.

“The girls are approaching from behind” 

Nodding a thanks to the spirit, he turned around, smiling. He let out a laugh as Drista groaned, playfully stomping her foot. Lani just laughed as she pushed Drista and waved at Tommy. Drista pulled the girl back and ran up to Tommy, giving him a nudge.

“How dare you catch us before we could jumpscare you.”

“You can’t scare me, I’m fucking badass. Now, let’s go see Tubbo.”

Lani happily interjected as soon as those words left Tommy’s mouth. 

“Oh! About my brother, he kinda, maybe, doesn’t know you’re coming.”

“What?!”

Panic settled into Tommy’s stomach. Tubbo didn’t know he was coming? What was going to happen? Would Tubbo turn him away? Yell at him? Did he not want to see him?

“Don’t worry! You’re a surprise! He’s been doing well, but he’s been missing you very much! Drista and I figured that you would surprise him with a visit?”

Huffing, Tommy crossed his arms with annoyance. Sighing, he nodded his head at the girls, who shared a high five.

“Just let me know this shit beforehand. Nearly panicked while working myself up to greeting him upon entering. Now I’ve gotta quickly work myself up to surprising him.”

As the girls apologized, waving off the boy, the pulled him over to a portal. Rolling his eyes, he peered up at the sign of the portal.

Stampy’s Lovely World

Lovely? Tommy couldn’t help but smile at that. Out of everyone he knew, Tubbo was one of the few that deserved to thrive in a peaceful place. Nearly toppling over as he was pulled forward by the eager girls, Tommy entered the portal to the new world.

--------

It truly was lovely. After exchanging a nervously polite greeting to the admin, Stampy, who was getting ready to board his hot air balloon, he set off with the girls as they walked through the magnificent world. He was honestly blown away with the creativity, love, care and dedication put in it all. Going through the amazing, colorful builds, the girls slowed down as they approached a cozy section, one that was easy on the eyes after all the color they walked through. Three cottages with different designs sat peacefully by each other. Bees were buzzing around in peace, pollinating the random flowers strewn around the ground. A small pond full of fish sat in between the center of the three cottages, each fish swimming in peace. Lani nodded before turning to the other two.

“Okay, here’s the plan, so listen up. I’ll go and get Tubbo and blindfold him, telling him that Drista and I got him a gift. Meanwhile, Drista, you hide Tommy in the present box we got-”

“Wait, I’m gonna be in a fucking box-”

“-and wait until I bring him over. Then, most likely confused by the size of the box, my brother will open it cautiously. Then, BAM!!! TOMMY’S HERE!!!”

“Sounds good to me!”

“Use a knife to get him to move faster.”

Lani laughed before bidding adieu, heading towards one of the houses. Once she was out of sight, Drista pulled a nervous Tommy over towards the back of the houses.

“Alright, get in the box, nerd.”

--------

The box was tiring to stand in for Tommy. Why couldn’t the girls pick a wider box? At least, then, he could lay down while he waited. Doing his best not to make a single noise or move that could give him away, Tommy tried to entertain himself as he stood there, ignoring the way his knees began to buckle. Just as he was about to groan, a familiar voice caused him to freeze.

“Where are you taking me? If you push me into the pond, Lani, I will pull you in with me.”

“I’m not pushing you in the pond! Stop being so paranoid!”

Tommy sucked in a nervous breath as he heard the footsteps stop. After a few seconds, the speaking began.

“A box?”

“Open it! Your present is inside!”

“It’s the best gift you’ll ever receive, guaranteed. Lani and I really popped off this time.”

“Really? Even better than the-”

“Absolutely, even better than the bees.”

Tommy prepared himself as he heard the wrapping paper being torn away. He heard nervous laughing as the box was being opened. A beam of sunlight caused him to shield his face from being blinded. Once he adjusted, he put down his hand, coming face to face with Tubbo, who looked as if he was seeing a ghost. Giving a nervous chuckle, Tommy opened his arms with hesitation.

“Hey, Tub- OOF”

Tommy didn’t even get to finish as he fell back, falling to the ground. Propping himself up with one arm, he peered down at the sobbing mess in his arms. His sobbing mess of a best friend. His Tubbo. Feeling the tears well up in his own eyes, Tommy engulfed Tubbo in a firm, desperate hug. Together, the two boys embraced each other in relieved tears as Drista and Lani shared a fist bump, smiling brightly at the scene before them.

“We’re awesome”

“Oh, absolutely, no questioning it”

--------

“So the same portal we both fell in took us to different servers? That’s strange”

“Totally. Need some help with that honey?”

The girls had left to play mini games much earlier, leaving the two boys to catch up in peace. They filled each other in with that they had been up to prior to that day. Tubbo was quite shocked to see that Tommy was much calmer than he remembered, more mellow. He was even more shocked to find out about his family. 

“What? You have another brother? And a mother?”

“I know, right? Nearly had a breakdown about Grian. Finding Kristin was hilarious, though.”

The two boys exchanged stories and adventures with each other, not wanted to leave anything out from their time spent apart. They didn’t even notice when the girls came back, announcing that it was time for Tommy to head back.

“I swear, he’s overreacting! I mean, I know why he’s adding a curfew, but I’m an adult now!”

The girls teased Tommy about his brother, who, according to him, was reading too much into Tommy spending too much time outside of the server. As annoyed as he was at it, Tommy understood his reasonings. Kristin hasn’t been told the whole story, but he just knew that she’d be the same way once she found out about what he’s gone through. Holding onto Tubbo’s hand, the four of them headed towards the portal to Hub. Once they arrived, Tommy let out a shaky breath as he squeezed his best friend’s hand.

“I’ll be back, okay? Not only do I need to bless you lot with my presence, I’ve gotta take proper measurements to make you guys your outfits for the gala. VIP and shit, that’s what you guys are! Custom made, just for you. Be safe, I’ll see you guys soon.”

Drista was the first to throw herself in for a hug. But, as predicted, she was also the first to pull away after Tommy hugged back for more than two seconds. Giving him a soft punch, she reminded him to pick a good color for her. Lani was next to embrace him, thanking him for taking the time to come to the server. Letting him know that she trusted his choices regarding her outfit, she let go with a smile. Tubbo didn’t even get the chance to move in for a hug, mainly due to Tommy wordlessly pulling him into one. The two stayed like that for a while, holding each other, scared to let go. As he pulled away, however, Tommy pulled something out of his inventory. Smiling at Tubbo, he gently placed it into his hand. 

“I’ll see you soon, Tubbo. Be safe.”

The three watched, waved, as Tommy disappeared through the portal. Peering down, Tubbo examined the gift. It was a replica of the green bandana from the Dream SMP. The only difference, however, was the little bees sewn on the end of it. Holding it close, Tubbo smiled as he walked back home, his sister and sister figure following behind, laughing amongst themselves.

Everything would be okay.

--------

Too much in a good mood to be bothered, Tommy paid no mind to the people who pushed past him in the Hub. Humming to himself, he almost missed the sound of soft whimpering. Stopping in his tracks, he listened closely, hearing it again. Frowning, he followed the noise to the source.

It was a small child, a little girl. She was a bit scuffled and was crying in front of a dark colored portal. Frowning, he looked up to see the name of the portal that she appeared to have come out of.  

2b2t

He had heard tales of the server from Phil, who spoke of the terrors that the anarchist server held. Blood running cold, he carefully bent down in front of the girl, carefully watching his tone. 

“Are you alright?”

She seemed frightened and hurt, reeling back from him and into the solid blocks of the portal. Doing his best not to scare her off, he offered a kind smile and a flower, to which she accepted after a moments hesitation. Seeing this as a promising sign, he tried again.

“Are you alright?”

The girl, who appeared to be no older than two, shook her head. Ignoring her own small injuries, she held up a torn stuffed bear. The sound of her small, soft, raspy voice caught him off guard.

“Broken...”

Humming, he looked around the crowd, searching for anyone who may have been looking for a child. Frowning, he bent back down to the child, who was looking at him with newfound hope. 

“Where’s your parent’s? Maybe they can fix up your bear for you. Doesn’t that sound nice?”

The young girl looked down at her scraped hands. Shaking her head, she Tommy’s pointed gaze to the 2b2t portal beside her. Her small voice spoke up, breaking the young adult’s heart.

“Broken”

[logan-please-smile-speaks]

Hi

also you’re required by law to read through the whole thing sorry not sorry

According to all known laws of aviation, there is no way a bee should be able to fly. Its wings are too small to get its fat little body off the ground. The bee, of course, flies anyway because bees don't care what humans think is impossible. Yellow, black. Yellow, black. Yellow, black. Yellow, black. Ooh, black and yellow! Let's shake it up a little. Barry! Breakfast is ready! Coming! Hang on a second. Hello? Barry? Adam? Can you believe this is happening? I can't. I'll pick you up. Looking sharp. Use the stairs, Your father paid good money for those. Sorry. I'm excited. Here's the graduate. We're very proud of you, son. A perfect report card, all B's. Very proud. Ma! I got a thing going here. You got lint on your fuzz. Ow! That's me! Wave to us! We'll be in row 118,000. Bye! Barry, I told you, stop flying in the house! Hey, Adam. Hey, Barry. Is that fuzz gel? A little. Special day, graduation. Never thought I'd make it. Three days grade school, three days high school. Those were awkward. Three days college. I'm glad I took a day and hitchhiked around The Hive. You did come back different. Hi, Barry. Artie, growing a mustache? Looks good. Hear about Frankie? Yeah. You going to the funeral? No, I'm not going. Everybody knows, sting someone, you die. Don't waste it on a squirrel. Such a hothead. I guess he could have just gotten out of the way. I love this incorporating an amusement park into our day. That's why we don't need vacations. Boy, quite a bit of pomp under the circumstances. Well, Adam, today we are men. We are! Bee-men. Amen! Hallelujah! Students, faculty, distinguished bees, please welcome Dean Buzzwell. Welcome, New Hive City graduating class of 9:15. That concludes our ceremonies And begins your career at Honex Industries! Will we pick our job today? I heard it's just orientation. Heads up! Here we go. Keep your hands and antennas inside the tram at all times. Wonder what it'll be like? A little scary. Welcome to Honex, a division of Honesco and a part of the Hexagon Group. This is it! Wow. Wow. We know that you, as a bee, have worked your whole life to get to the point where you can work for your whole life. Honey begins when our valiant Pollen Jocks bring the nectar to The Hive. Our top-secret formula is automatically color-corrected, scent-adjusted and bubble-contoured into this soothing sweet syrup with its distinctive golden glow you know as... Honey! That girl was hot. She's my cousin! She is? Yes, we're all cousins. Right. You're right. At Honex, we constantly strive to improve every aspect of bee existence. These bees are stress-testing a new helmet technology. What do you think he makes? Not enough. Here we have our latest advancement, the Krelman. What does that do? Catches that little strand of honey that hangs after you pour it. Saves us millions. Can anyone work on the Krelman? Of course. Most bee jobs are small ones. But bees know that every small job, if it's done well, means a lot. But choose carefully because you'll stay in the job you pick for the rest of your life. The same job the rest of your life? I didn't know that. What's the difference? You'll be happy to know that bees, as a species, haven't had one day off in 27 million years. So you'll just work us to death? We'll sure try. Wow! That blew my mind! "What's the difference?" How can you say that? One job forever? That's an insane choice to have to make. I'm relieved. Now we only have to make one decision in life. But, Adam, how could they never have told us that? Why would you question anything? We're bees. We're the most perfectly functioning society on Earth. You ever think maybe things work a little too well here? Like what? Give me one example. I don't know. But you know what I'm talking about. Please clear the gate. Royal Nectar Force on approach. Wait a second. Check it out. Hey, those are Pollen Jocks! Wow. I've never seen them this close. They know what it's like outside The Hive. Yeah, but some don't come back. Hey, Jocks! Hi, Jocks! You guys did great! You're monsters! You're sky freaks! I love it! I love it! I wonder where they were. I don't know. Their day's not planned. Outside The Hive, flying who knows where, doing who knows what. You can't just decide to be a Pollen Jock. You have to be bred for that. Right. Look. That's more pollen than you and I will see in a lifetime. It's just a status symbol. Bees make too much of it. Perhaps. Unless you're wearing it and the ladies see you wearing it. Those ladies? Aren't they our cousins too? Distant. Distant. Look at these two. Couple of Hive Harrys. Let's have fun with them. It must be dangerous being a Pollen Jock. Yeah. Once a bear pinned me against a mushroom! He had a paw on my throat, and with the other, he was slapping me! Oh, my! I never thought I'd knock him out. What were you doing during this? Trying to alert the authorities. I can autograph that. A little gusty out there today, wasn't it, comrades? Yeah. Gusty. We're hitting a sunflower patch six miles from here tomorrow. Six miles, huh? Barry! A puddle jump for us, but maybe you're not up for it. Maybe I am. You are not! We're going 0900 at J-Gate. What do you think, buzzy-boy? Are you bee enough? I might be. It all depends on what 0900 means. Hey, Honex! Dad, you surprised me. You decide what you're interested in? Well, there's a lot of choices. But you only get one. Do you ever get bored doing the same job every day? Son, let me tell you about stirring. You grab that stick, and you just move it around, and you stir it around. You get yourself into a rhythm. It's a beautiful thing. You know, Dad, the more I think about it, maybe the honey field just isn't right for me. You were thinking of what, making balloon animals? That's a bad job for a guy with a stinger. Janet, your son's not sure he wants to go into honey! Barry, you are so funny sometimes. I'm not trying to be funny. You're not funny! You're going into honey. Our son, the stirrer! You're gonna be a stirrer? No one's listening to me! Wait till you see the sticks I have. I could say anything right now. I'm gonna get an ant tattoo! Let's open some honey and celebrate! Maybe I'll pierce my thorax. Shave my antennae. Shack up with a grasshopper. Get a gold tooth and call everybody "dawg"! I'm so proud. We're starting work today! Today's the day. Come on! All the good jobs will be gone. Yeah, right. Pollen counting, stunt bee, pouring, stirrer, front desk, hair removal... Is it still available? Hang on. Two left! One of them's yours! Congratulations! Step to the side. What'd you get? Picking crud out. Stellar! Wow! Couple of newbies? Yes, sir! Our first day! We are ready! Make your choice. You want to go first? No, you go. Oh, my. What's available? Restroom attendant's open, not for the reason you think. Any chance of getting the Krelman? Sure, you're on. I'm sorry, the Krelman just closed out. Wax monkey's always open. The Krelman opened up again. What happened? A bee died. Makes an opening. See? He's dead. Another dead one. Deady. Deadified. Two more dead. Dead from the neck up. Dead from the neck down. That's life! Oh, this is so hard! Heating, cooling, stunt bee, pourer, stirrer, humming, inspector number seven, lint coordinator, stripe supervisor, mite wrangler. Barry, what do you think I should... Barry? Barry! All right, we've got the sunflower patch in quadrant nine... What happened to you? Where are you? I'm going out. Out? Out where? Out there. Oh, no! I have to, before I go to work for the rest of my life. You're gonna die! You're crazy! Hello? Another call coming in. If anyone's feeling brave, there's a Korean deli on 83rd that gets their roses today. Hey, guys. Look at that. Isn't that the kid we saw yesterday? Hold it, son, flight deck's restricted. It's OK, Lou. We're gonna take him up. Really? Feeling lucky, are you? Sign here, here. Just initial that. Thank you. OK. You got a rain advisory today, and as you all know, bees cannot fly in rain. So be careful. As always, watch your brooms, hockey sticks, dogs, birds, bears and bats. Also, I got a couple of reports of root beer being poured on us. Murphy's in a home because of it, babbling like a cicada! That's awful. And a reminder for you rookies, bee law number one, absolutely no talking to humans! All right, launch positions! Buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz! Buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz! Buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz! Black and yellow! Hello! You ready for this, hot shot? Yeah. Yeah, bring it on. Wind, check. Antennae, check. Nectar pack, check. Wings, check. Stinger, check. Scared out of my shorts, check. OK, ladies, let's move it out! Pound those petunias, you striped stem-suckers! All of you, drain those flowers! Wow! I'm out! I can't believe I'm out! So blue. I feel so fast and free! Box kite! Wow! Flowers! This is Blue Leader, We have roses visual. Bring it around 30 degrees and hold. Roses! 30 degrees, roger. Bringing it around. Stand to the side, kid. It's got a bit of a kick. That is one nectar collector! Ever see pollination up close? No, sir. I pick up some pollen here, sprinkle it over here. Maybe a dash over there, a pinch on that one. See that? It's a little bit of magic. That's amazing. Why do we do that? That's pollen power. More pollen, more flowers, more nectar, more honey for us. Cool. I'm picking up a lot of bright yellow, Could be daisies, Don't we need those? Copy that visual. Wait. One of these flowers seems to be on the move. Say again? You're reporting a moving flower? Affirmative. That was on the line! This is the coolest. What is it? I don't know, but I'm loving this color. It smells good. Not like a flower, but I like it. Yeah, fuzzy. Chemical-y. Careful, guys. It's a little grabby. My sweet lord of bees! Candy-brain, get off there! Problem! Guys! This could be bad. Affirmative. Very close. Gonna hurt. Mama's little boy. You are way out of position, rookie! Coming in at you like a missile! Help me! I don't think these are flowers. Should we tell him? I think he knows. What is this?! Match point! You can start packing up, honey, because you're about to eat it! Yowser! Gross. There's a bee in the car! Do something! I'm driving! Hi, bee. He's back here! He's going to sting me! Nobody move. If you don't move, he won't sting you. Freeze! He blinked! Spray him, Granny! What are you doing?! Wow... the tension level out here is unbelievable. I gotta get home. Can't fly in rain. Can't fly in rain. Can't fly in rain. Mayday! Mayday! Bee going down! Ken, could you close the window please? Ken, could you close the window please? Check out my new resume. I made it into a fold-out brochure. You see? Folds out. Oh, no. More humans. I don't need this. What was that? Maybe this time. This time. This time. This time! This time! This... Drapes! That is diabolical. It's fantastic. It's got all my special skills, even my top-ten favorite movies. What's number one? Star Wars? Nah, I don't go for that... kind of stuff. No wonder we shouldn't talk to them. They're out of their minds. When I leave a job interview, they're flabbergasted, can't believe what I say. There's the sun. Maybe that's a way out. I don't remember the sun having a big 75 on it. I predicted global warming. I could feel it getting hotter. At first I thought it was just me. Wait! Stop! Bee! Stand back. These are winter boots. Wait! Don't kill him! You know I'm allergic to them! This thing could kill me! Why does his life have less value than yours? Why does his life have any less value than mine? Is that your statement? I'm just saying all life has value. You don't know what he's capable of feeling. My brochure! There you go, little guy. I'm not scared of him.It's an allergic thing. Put that on your resume brochure. My whole face could puff up. Make it one of your special skills. Knocking someone out is also a special skill. Right. Bye, Vanessa. Thanks. Vanessa, next week? Yogurt night? Sure, Ken. You know, whatever. You could put carob chips on there. Bye. Supposed to be less calories. Bye. I gotta say something. She saved my life. I gotta say something. All right, here it goes. Nah. What would I say? I could really get in trouble. It's a bee law. You're not supposed to talk to a human. I can't believe I'm doing this. I've got to. Oh, I can't do it. Come on! No. Yes. No. Do it. I can't. How should I start it? "You like jazz?" No, that's no good. Here she comes! Speak, you fool! Hi! I'm sorry. You're talking. Yes, I know. You're talking! I'm so sorry. No, it's OK. It's fine. I know I'm dreaming. But I don't recall going to bed. Well, I'm sure this is very disconcerting. This is a bit of a surprise to me. I mean, you're a bee! I am. And I'm not supposed to be doing this, but they were all trying to kill me. And if it wasn't for you... I had to thank you. It's just how I was raised. That was a little weird. I'm talking with a bee. Yeah. I'm talking to a bee. And the bee is talking to me! I just want to say I'm grateful. I'll leave now. Wait! How did you learn to do that? What? The talking thing. Same way you did, I guess. "Mama, Dada, honey." You pick it up. That's very funny. Yeah. Bees are funny. If we didn't laugh, we'd cry with what we have to deal with. Anyway... Can I... get you something? Like what? I don't know. I mean... I don't know. Coffee? I don't want to put you out. It's no trouble. It takes two minutes. It's just coffee. I hate to impose. Don't be ridiculous! Actually, I would love a cup. Hey, you want rum cake? I shouldn't. Have some. No, I can't. Come on! I'm trying to lose a couple micrograms. Where? These stripes don't help. You look great! I don't know if you know anything about fashion. Are you all right? No. He's making the tie in the cab as they're flying up Madison. He finally gets there. He runs up the steps into the church. The wedding is on. And he says, "Watermelon? I thought you said Guatemalan. Why would I marry a watermelon?" Is that a bee joke? That's the kind of stuff we do. Yeah, different. So, what are you gonna do, Barry? About work? I don't know. I want to do my part for The Hive, but I can't do it the way they want. I know how you feel. You do? Sure. My parents wanted me to be a lawyer or a doctor, but I wanted to be a florist. Really? My only interest is flowers. Our new queen was just elected with that same campaign slogan. Anyway, if you look... There's my hive right there. See it? You're in Sheep Meadow! Yes! I'm right off the Turtle Pond! No way! I know that area. I lost a toe ring there once. Why do girls put rings on their toes? Why not? It's like putting a hat on your knee. Maybe I'll try that. You all right, ma'am? Oh, yeah. Fine. Just having two cups of coffee! Anyway, this has been great. Thanks for the coffee. Yeah, it's no trouble. Sorry I couldn't finish it. If I did, I'd be up the rest of my life. Are you...? Can I take a piece of this with me? Sure! Here, have a crumb. Thanks! Yeah. All right. Well, then... I guess I'll see you around. Or not. OK, Barry. And thank you so much again... for before. Oh, that? That was nothing. Well, not nothing, but... Anyway... This can't possibly work. He's all set to go. We may as well try it. OK, Dave, pull the chute. Sounds amazing. It was amazing! It was the scariest, happiest moment of my life. Humans! I can't believe you were with humans! Giant, scary humans! What were they like? Huge and crazy. They talk crazy. They eat crazy giant things. They drive crazy. Do they try and kill you, like on TV? Some of them. But some of them don't. How'd you get back? Poodle. You did it, and I'm glad. You saw whatever you wanted to see. You had your "experience." Now you can pick out yourjob and be normal. Well... Well? Well, I met someone. You did? Was she Bee-ish? A wasp?! Your parents will kill you! No, no, no, not a wasp. Spider? I'm not attracted to spiders. I know it's the hottest thing, with the eight legs and all. I can't get by that face. So who is she? She's... human. No, no. That's a bee law. You wouldn't break a bee law. Her name's Vanessa. Oh, boy. She's so nice. And she's a florist! Oh, no! You're dating a human florist! We're not dating. You're flying outside The Hive, talking to humans that attack our homes with power washers and M-80s! One-eighth a stick of dynamite! She saved my life! And she understands me. This is over! Eat this. This is not over! What was that? They call it a crumb. It was so stingin' stripey! And that's not what they eat. That's what falls off what they eat! You know what a Cinnabon is? No. It's bread and cinnamon and frosting. They heat it up... Sit down! ...really hot! Listen to me! We are not them! We're us. There's us and there's them! Yes, but who can deny the heart that is yearning? There's no yearning. Stop yearning. Listen to me! You have got to start thinking bee, my friend. Thinking bee! Thinking bee. Thinking bee. Thinking bee! Thinking bee! Thinking bee! Thinking bee! There he is. He's in the pool. You know what your problem is, Barry? I gotta start thinking bee? How much longer will this go on? It's been three days! Why aren't you working? I've got a lot of big life decisions to think about. What life? You have no life! You have no job. You're barely a bee! Would it kill you to make a little honey? Barry, come out. Your father's talking to you. Martin, would you talk to him? Barry, I'm talking to you! You coming? Got everything? All set! Go ahead. I'll catch up. Don't be too long. Watch this! Vanessa! We're still here. I told you not to yell at him. He doesn't respond to yelling! Then why yell at me? Because you don't listen! I'm not listening to this. Sorry, I've gotta go. Where are you going? I'm meeting a friend. A girl? Is this why you can't decide? Bye. I just hope she's Bee-ish. They have a huge parade of flowers every year in Pasadena? To be in the Tournament of Roses, that's every florist's dream! Up on a float, surrounded by flowers, crowds cheering. A tournament. Do the roses compete in athletic events? No. All right, I've got one. How come you don't fly everywhere? It's exhausting. Why don't you run everywhere? It's faster. Yeah, OK, I see, I see. All right, your turn. TiVo. You can just freeze live TV? That's insane! You don't have that? We have Hivo, but it's a disease. It's a horrible, horrible disease. Oh, my. Dumb bees! You must want to sting all those jerks. We try not to sting. It's usually fatal for us. So you have to watch your temper. Very carefully. You kick a wall, take a walk, write an angry letter and throw it out. Work through it like any emotion: Anger, jealousy, lust. Oh, my goodness! Are you OK? Yeah. What is wrong with you?! It's a bug. He's not bothering anybody. Get out of here, you creep! What was that? A Pic 'N' Save circular? Yeah, it was. How did you know? It felt like about 10 pages. Seventy-five is pretty much our limit. You've really got that down to a science. I lost a cousin to Italian Vogue. I'll bet. What in the name of Mighty Hercules is this? How did this get here? cute Bee, Golden Blossom, Ray Liotta Private Select? Is he that actor? I never heard of him. Why is this here? For people. We eat it. You don't have enough food of your own? Well, yes. How do you get it? Bees make it. I know who makes it! And it's hard to make it! There's heating, cooling, stirring. You need a whole Krelman thing! It's organic. It's our-ganic! It's just honey, Barry. Just what?! Bees don't know about this! This is stealing! A lot of stealing! You've taken our homes, schools,hospitals! This is all we have! And it's on sale?! I'm getting to the bottom of this. I'm getting to the bottom of all of this! Hey, Hector. You almost done? Almost. He is here. I sense it. Well, I guess I'll go home now and just leave this nice honey out, with no one around. You're busted, box boy! I knew I heard something. So you can talk! I can talk. And now you'll start talking! Where you getting the sweet stuff? Who's your supplier? I don't understand. I thought we were friends. The last thing we want to do is upset bees! You're too late! It's ours now! You, sir, have crossed the wrong sword! You, sir, will be lunch for my iguana, Ignacio! Where is the honey coming from? Tell me where! Honey Farms! It comes from Honey Farms! Crazy person! What horrible thing has happened here? These faces, they never knew what hit them. And now they're on the road to nowhere! Just keep still. What? You're not dead? Do I look dead? They will wipe anything that moves. Where you headed? To Honey Farms. I am onto something huge here. I'm going to Alaska. Moose blood, crazy stuff. Blows your head off! I'm going to Tacoma. And you? He really is dead. All right. Uh-oh! What is that?! Oh, no! A wiper! Triple blade! Triple blade? Jump on! It's your only chance, bee! Why does everything have to be so doggone clean?! How much do you people need to see?! Open your eyes! Stick your head out the window! From NPR News in Washington, I'm Carl Kasell. But don't kill no more bugs! Bee! Moose blood guy!! You hear something? Like what? Like tiny screaming. Turn off the radio. Whassup, bee boy? Hey, Blood. Just a row of honey jars, as far as the eye could see. Wow! I assume wherever this truck goes is where they're getting it. I mean, that honey's ours. Bees hang tight. We're all jammed in. It's a close community. Not us, man. We on our own. Every mosquito on his own. What if you get in trouble? You a mosquito, you in trouble. Nobody likes us. They just smack. See a mosquito, smack, smack! At least you're out in the world. You must meet girls. Mosquito girls try to trade up, get with a moth, dragonfly. Mosquito girl don't want no mosquito. You got to be kidding me! Mooseblood's about to leave the building! So long, bee! Hey, guys! Mooseblood! I knew I'd catch y'all down here. Did you bring your crazy straw? We throw it in jars, slap a label on it, and it's pretty much pure profit. What is this place? A bee's got a brain the size of a pinhead. They are pinheads! Pinhead. Check out the new smoker. Oh, sweet. That's the one you want. The Thomas 3000! Smoker? Ninety puffs a minute, semi-automatic. Twice the nicotine, all the tar. A couple breaths of this knocks them right out. They make the honey, and we make the money. "They make the honey, and we make the money"? Oh, my! What's going on? Are you OK? Yeah. It doesn't last too long. Do you know you're in a fake hive with fake walls? Our queen was moved here. We had no choice. This is your queen? That's a man in women's clothes! That's a drag queen! What is this? Oh, no! There's hundreds of them! Bee honey. Our honey is being brazenly stolen on a massive scale! This is worse than anything bears have done! I intend to do something. Oh, Barry, stop. Who told you humans are taking our honey? That's a rumor. Do these look like rumors? That's a conspiracy theory. These are obviously doctored photos. How did you get mixed up in this? He's been talking to humans. What? Talking to humans?! He has a human girlfriend. And they make out! Make out? Barry! We do not. You wish you could. Whose side are you on? The bees! I dated a cricket once in San Antonio. Those crazy legs kept me up all night. Barry, this is what you want to do with your life? I want to do it for all our lives. Nobody works harder than bees! Dad, I remember you coming home so overworked your hands were still stirring. You couldn't stop. I remember that. What right do they have to our honey? We live on two cups a year. They put it in lip balm for no reason whatsoever! Even if it's true, what can one bee do? Sting them where it really hurts. In the face! The eye! That would hurt. No. Up the nose? That's a killer. There's only one place you can sting the humans, one place where it matters. Hive at Five, The Hive's only full-hour action news source. No more bee beards! With Bob Bumble at the anchor desk. Weather with Storm Stinger. Sports with Buzz Larvi. And Jeanette Chung. Good evening. I'm Bob Bumble. And I'm Jeanette Ohung. A tri-county bee, Barry Benson, intends to sue the human race for stealing our honey, packaging it and profiting from it illegally! Tomorrow night on Bee Larry King, we'll have three former queens here in our studio, discussing their new book, classy Ladies, out this week on Hexagon. Tonight we're talking to Barry Benson. Did you ever think, "I'm a kid from The Hive. I can't do this"? Bees have never been afraid to change the world. What about Bee Oolumbus? Bee Gandhi? Bejesus? Where I'm from, we'd never sue humans. We were thinking of stickball or candy stores. How old are you? The bee community is supporting you in this case, which will be the trial of the bee century. You know, they have a Larry King in the human world too. It's a common name. Next week... He looks like you and has a show and suspenders and colored dots... Next week... Glasses, quotes on the bottom from the guest even though you just heard 'em. Bear Week next week! They're scary, hairy and here live. Always leans forward, pointy shoulders, squinty eyes, very Jewish. In tennis, you attack at the point of weakness! It was my grandmother, Ken. She's 81. Honey, her backhand's a joke! I'm not gonna take advantage of that? Quiet, please. Actual work going on here. Is that that same bee? Yes, it is! I'm helping him sue the human race. Hello. Hello, bee. This is Ken. Yeah, I remember you. Timberland, size ten and a half. Vibram sole, I believe. Why does he talk again? Listen, you better go 'cause we're really busy working. But it's our yogurt night! Bye-bye. Why is yogurt night so difficult?! You poor thing. You two have been at this for hours! Yes, and Adam here has been a huge help. Frosting... How many sugars? Just one. I try not to use the competition. So why are you helping me? Bees have good qualities. And it takes my mind off the shop. Instead of flowers, people are giving balloon bouquets now. Those are great, if you're three. And artificial flowers. Oh, those just get me psychotic! Yeah, me too. Bent stingers, pointless pollination. Bees must hate those fake things! Nothing worse than a daffodil that's had work done. Maybe this could make up for it a little bit. This lawsuit's a pretty big deal. I guess. You sure you want to go through with it? Am I sure? When I'm done with the humans, they won't be able to say, "Honey, I'm home," without paying a royalty! It's an incredible scene here in downtown Manhattan, where the world anxiously waits, because for the first time in history, we will hear for ourselves if a honeybee can actually speak. What have we gotten into here, Barry? It's pretty big, isn't it? I can't believe how many humans don't work during the day. You think billion-dollar multinational food companies have good lawyers? Everybody needs to stay behind the barricade. What's the matter? I don't know, I just got a chill. Well, if it isn't the bee team. You boys work on this? All rise! The Honorable Judge Bumbleton presiding. All right. Case number 4475, Superior Court of New York, Barry Bee Benson v. the Honey Industry is now in session. Mr. Montgomery, you're representing the five food companies collectively? A privilege. Mr. Benson... you're representing all the bees of the world? I'm kidding. Yes, Your Honor, we're ready to proceed. Mr. Montgomery, your opening statement, please. Ladies and gentlemen of the jury, my grandmother was a simple woman. Born on a farm, she believed it was man's divine right to benefit from the bounty of nature God put before us. If we lived in the topsy-turvy world Mr. Benson imagines, just think of what would it mean. I would have to negotiate with the silkworm for the elastic in my britches! Talking bee! How do we know this isn't some sort of holographic motion-picture-capture Hollywood wizardry? They could be using laser beams! Robotics! Ventriloquism! Cloning! For all we know, he could be on steroids! Mr. Benson? Ladies and gentlemen, there's no trickery here. I'm just an ordinary bee. Honey's pretty important to me. It's important to all bees. We invented it! We make it. And we protect it with our lives. Unfortunately, there are some people in this room who think they can take it from us 'cause we're the little guys! I'm hoping that, after this is all over, you'll see how, by taking our honey, you not only take everything we have but everything we are! I wish he'd dress like that all the time. So nice! Call your first witness. So, Mr. Klauss Vanderhayden of Honey Farms, big company you have. I suppose so. I see you also own Honeyburton and Honron! Yes, they provide beekeepers for our farms. Beekeeper. I find that to be a very disturbing term. I don't imagine you employ any bee-free-ers, do you? No. I couldn't hear you. No. No. Because you don't free bees. You keep bees. Not only that, it seems you thought a bear would be an appropriate image for a jar of honey. They're very lovable creatures. Yogi Bear, Fozzie Bear, Build-A-Bear. You mean like this? Bears kill bees! How'd you like his head crashing through your living room?! Biting into your couch! Spitting out your throw pillows! OK, that's enough. Take him away. So, Mr. Sting, thank you for being here. Your name intrigues me. Where have I heard it before? I was with a band called The Police. But you've never been a police officer, have you? No, I haven't. No, you haven't. And so here we have yet another example of bee culture casually stolen by a human for nothing more than a prance-about stage name. Oh, please. Have you ever been stung, Mr. Sting? Because I'm feeling a little stung, Sting. Or should I say... Mr. Gordon M. Sumner! That's not his real name?! You idiots! Mr. Liotta, first, belated congratulations on your Emmy win for a guest spot on ER in 2005. Thank you. Thank you. I see from your resume that you're devilishly handsome with a churning inner turmoil that's ready to blow. I enjoy what I do. Is that a crime? Not yet it isn't. But is this what it's come to for you? Exploiting tiny, helpless bees so you don't have to rehearse your part and learn your lines, sir? Watch it, Benson! I could blow right now! This isn't a goodfella. This is a badfella! Why doesn't someone just step on this creep, and we can all go home?! Order in this court! You're all thinking it! Order! Order, I say! Say it! Mr. Liotta, please sit down! I think it was awfully nice of that bear to pitch in like that. I think the jury's on our side. Are we doing everything right, legally? I'm a florist. Right. Well, here's to a great team. To a great team! Well, hello. Ken! Hello. I didn't think you were coming. No, I was just late I tried to call, but... the battery. I didn't want all this to go to waste, so I called Barry. Luckily, he was free. Oh, that was lucky. There's a little left. I could heat it up. Yeah, heat it up, sure, whatever. So I hear you're quite a tennis player. I'm not much for the game myself. The ball's a little grabby. That's where I usually sit. Right... there. Ken, Barry was looking at your resume, and he agreed with me that eating with chopsticks isn't really a special skill. You think I don't see what you're doing? I know how hard it is to find the right job. We have that in common. Do we? Bees have 100 percent employment, but we do jobs like taking the crud out. That's just what I was thinking about doing. Ken, I let Barry borrow your razor for his fuzz. I hope that was all right. I'm going to drain the old stinger. Yeah, you do that. Look at that. You know, I've just about had it with your little Mind Games. What's that? Italian Vogue. Mamma mia, that's a lot of pages. A lot of ads. Remember what Van said, why is your life more valuable than mine? Funny, I just can't seem to recall that! I think something stinks in here! I love the smell of flowers. How do you like the smell of flames?! Not as much. Water bug! Not taking sides! Ken, I'm wearing a Chapstick hat! This is pathetic! I've got issues! Well, well, well, a royal flush! You're bluffing. Am I? Surf's up, dude! Poo water! That bowl is gnarly. Except for those dirty yellow rings! Kenneth! What are you doing?! You know, I don't even like honey! I don't eat it! We need to talk! He's just a little bee! And he happens to be the nicest bee I've met in a long time! Long time? What are you talking about?! Are there other bugs in your life? No, but there are other things bugging me in life. And you're one of them! Fine! Talking bees, no yogurt night... My nerves are fried from riding on this emotional roller coaster! Goodbye, Ken. And for your information, I prefer sugar-free, artificial sweeteners made by man! I'm sorry about all that. I know it's got an aftertaste! I like it! I always felt there was some kind of barrier between Ken and me. I couldn't overcome it. Oh, well. Are you OK for the trial? I believe Mr. Montgomery is about out of ideas. We would like to call Mr. Barry Benson Bee to the stand. Good idea! You can really see why he's considered one of the best lawyers... Yeah. Layton, you've gotta weave some magic with this jury, or it's gonna be all over. Don't worry. The only thing I have to do to turn this jury around is to remind them of what they don't like about bees. You got the tweezers? Are you allergic? Only to losing, son. Only to losing. Mr. Benson Bee, I'll ask you what I think we'd all like to know. What exactly is your relationship to that woman? We're friends. Good friends? Yes. How good? Do you live together? Wait a minute... Are you her little... bedbug? I've seen a bee documentary or two. From what I understand, doesn't your queen give birth to all the bee children? Yeah, but... So those aren't your real parents! Oh, Barry... Yes, they are! Hold me back! You're an illegitimate bee, aren't you, Benson? He's denouncing bees! Don't y'all date your cousins? Objection! I'm going to pincushion this guy! Adam, don't! It's what he wants! Oh, I'm hit!! Oh, lordy, I am hit! Order! Order! The venom! The venom is coursing through my veins! I have been felled by a winged beast of destruction! You see? You can't treat them like equals! They're striped savages! Stinging's the only thing they know! It's their way! Adam, stay with me. I can't feel my legs. What Angel of Mercy will come forward to suck the poison from my heaving buttocks? I will have order in this court. Order! Order, please! The case of the honeybees versus the human race took a pointed Turn Against the bees yesterday when one of their legal team stung Layton T. Montgomery. Hey, buddy. Hey. Is there much pain? Yeah. I... I blew the whole case, didn't I? It doesn't matter. What matters is you're alive. You could have died. I'd be better off dead. Look at me. They got it from the cafeteria downstairs, in a tuna sandwich. Look, there's a little celery still on it. What was it like to sting someone? I can't explain it. It was all... All adrenaline and then...and then ecstasy! All right. You think it was all a trap? Of course. I'm sorry. I flew us right into this. What were we thinking? Look at us. We're just a couple of bugs in this world. What will the humans do to us if they win? I don't know. I hear they put the roaches in motels. That doesn't sound so bad. Adam, they check in, but they don't check out! Oh, my. Could you get a nurse to close that window? Why? The smoke. Bees don't smoke. Right. Bees don't smoke. Bees don't smoke! But some bees are smoking. That's it! That's our case! It is? It's not over? Get dressed. I've gotta go somewhere. Get back to the court and stall. Stall any way you can. And assuming you've done step correctly, you're ready for the tub. Mr. Flayman. Yes? Yes, Your Honor! Where is the rest of your team? Well, Your Honor, it's interesting. Bees are trained to fly haphazardly, and as a result, we don't make very good time. I actually heard a funny story about... Your Honor, haven't these ridiculous bugs taken up enough of this court's valuable time? How much longer will we allow these absurd shenanigans to go on? They have presented no compelling evidence to support their charges against my clients, who run legitimate businesses. I move for a complete dismissal of this entire case! Mr. Flayman, I'm afraid I'm going to have to consider Mr. Montgomery's motion. But you can't! We have a terrific case. Where is your proof? Where is the evidence? Show me the smoking gun! Hold it, Your Honor! You want a smoking gun? Here is your smoking gun. What is that? It's a bee smoker! What, this? This harmless little contraption? This couldn't hurt a fly, let alone a bee. Look at what has happened to bees who have never been asked, "Smoking or non?" Is this what nature intended for us? To be forcibly addicted to smoke machines and man-made wooden slat work camps? Living out our lives as honey slaves to the white man? What are we gonna do? He's playing the species card. Ladies and gentlemen, please, free these bees! Free the bees! Free the bees! Free the bees! Free the bees! Free the bees! The court finds in favor of the bees! Vanessa, we won! I knew you could do it! High-five! Sorry. I'm OK! You know what this means? All the honey will finally belong to the bees. Now we won't have to work so hard all the time. This is an unholy perversion of the balance of nature, Benson. You'll regret this. Barry, how much honey is out there? All right. One at a time. Barry, who are you wearing? My sweater is Ralph Lauren, and I have no pants. What if Montgomery's right? What do you mean? We've been living the bee way a long time, 27 million years. Congratulations on your victory. What will you demand as a settlement? First, we'll demand a complete shutdown of all bee work camps. Then we want back the honey that was ours to begin with, every last drop. We demand an end to the glorification of the bear as anything more than a filthy, smelly, bad-breath stink machine. We're all aware of what they do in the woods. Wait for my signal. Take him out. He'll have nauseous for a few hours, then he'll be fine. And we will no longer tolerate bee-negative nicknames... But it's just a prance-about stage name! ...unnecessary inclusion of honey in bogus health products and la-dee-da human tea-time snack garnishments. Can't breathe. Bring it in, boys! Hold it right there! Good. Tap it. Mr. Buzzwell, we just passed three cups and there's gallons more coming! I think we need to shut down! Shut down? We've never shut down. Shut down honey production! Stop making honey! Turn your key, sir! What do we do now? Cannonball! We're shutting honey production! Mission abort. Aborting pollination and nectar detail. Returning to base. Adam, you wouldn't believe how much honey was out there. Oh, yeah? What's going on? Where is everybody? Are they out celebrating? They're home. They don't know what to do. Laying out, sleeping in. I heard your Uncle Carl was on his way to San Antonio with a cricket. At least we got our honey back. Sometimes I think, so what if humans liked our honey? Who wouldn't? It's the greatest thing in the world! I was excited to be part of making it. This was my new desk. This was my new job. I wanted to do it really well. And now... Now I can't. I don't understand why they're not happy. I thought their lives would be better! They're doing nothing. It's amazing. Honey really changes people. You don't have any idea what's going on, do you? What did you want to show me? This. What happened here? That is not the half of it. Oh, no. Oh, my. They're all wilting. Doesn't look very good, does it? No. And whose fault do you think that is? You know, I'm gonna guess bees. Bees? Specifically, me. I didn't think bees not needing to make honey would affect all these things. It's not just flowers. Fruits, vegetables, they all need bees. That's our whole SAT test right there. Take away produce, that affects the entire animal kingdom. And then, of course... The human species? So if there's no more pollination, it could all just go south here, couldn't it? I know this is also partly my fault. How about a suicide pact? How do we do it? I'll sting you, you step on me. That just kills you twice. Right, right. Listen, Barry... sorry, but I gotta get going. I had to open my mouth and talk. Vanessa? Vanessa? Why are you leaving? Where are you going? To the final Tournament of Roses parade in Pasadena. They've moved it to this weekend because all the flowers are dying. It's the Last Chance I'll ever have to see it. Vanessa, I just wanna say I'm sorry. I never meant it to turn out like this. I know. Me neither. Tournament of Roses. Roses can't do sports. Wait a minute. Roses. Roses? Roses! Vanessa! Roses?! Barry? Roses are flowers! Yes, they are. Flowers, bees, pollen! I know. That's why this is the last parade. Maybe not. Could you ask him to slow down? Could you slow down? Barry! OK, I made a huge mistake. This is a total disaster, all my fault. Yes, it kind of is. I've ruined the planet. I wanted to help you with the flower shop. I've made it worse. Actually, it's completely closed down. I thought maybe you were remodeling. But I have another idea, and it's greater than my previous ideas combined. I don't want to hear it! All right, they have the roses, the roses have the pollen. I know every bee, plant and flower bud in this park. All we gotta do is get what they've got back here with what we've got. Bees. Park. Pollen! Flowers. Repollination! Across the nation! Tournament of Roses, Pasadena, California. They've got nothing but flowers, floats and cotton candy. Security will be tight. I have an idea. Vanessa Bloome, FTD. Official floral business. It's real. Sorry, ma'am. Nice brooch. Thank you. It was a gift. Once inside, we just pick the right float. How about The Princess and the Pea? I could be the princess, and you could be the pea! Yes, I got it. Where should I sit? What are you? I believe I'm the pea. The pea? It goes under the mattresses. Not in this fairy tale, sweetheart. I'm getting the marshal. You do that! This whole parade is a fiasco! Let's see what this baby'll do. Hey, what are you doing?! Then all we do is blend in with traffic... without arousing suspicion. Once at the airport, there's no stopping us. Stop! Security. You and your insect pack your float? Yes. Has it been in your possession the entire time? Would you remove your shoes? Remove your stinger. It's part of me. I know. Just having some fun. Enjoy your flight. Then if we're lucky, we'll have just enough pollen to do the job. Can you believe how lucky we are? We have just enough pollen to do the job! I think this is gonna work. It's got to work. Attention, passengers, this is Captain Scott. We have a bit of bad weather in New York. It looks like we'll experience a couple hours delay. Barry, these are cut flowers with no water. They'll never make it. I gotta get up there and talk to them. Be careful. Can I get help with the Sky Mall magazine? I'd like to order the talking inflatable nose and ear hair trimmer. Captain, I'm in a real situation. What'd you say, Hal? Nothing. Bee! Don't freak out! My entire species... What are you doing? Wait a minute! I'm an attorney! Who's an attorney? Don't move. Oh, Barry. Good afternoon, passengers. This is your captain. Would a Miss Vanessa Bloome in 24B please report to the cockpit? And please hurry! What happened here? There was a DustBuster, a toupee, a life raft exploded. One's bald, one's in a boat, they're both unconscious! Is that another bee joke? No! No one's flying the plane! This is JFK control tower, Flight 356. What's your status? This is Vanessa Bloome. I'm a florist from New York. Where's the pilot? He's unconscious, and so is the copilot. Not good. Does anyone onboard have flight experience? As a matter of fact, there is. Who's that? Barry Benson. From the honey trial?! Oh, great. Vanessa, this is nothing more than a big metal bee. It's got giant wings, huge engines. I can't fly a plane. Why not? Isn't John Travolta a pilot? Yes. How hard could it be? Wait, Barry! We're headed into some lightning. This is Bob Bumble. We have some late-breaking news from JFK Airport, where a suspenseful scene is developing. Barry Benson, fresh from his legal victory... That's Barry! ...is attempting to land a plane, loaded with people, flowers and an incapacitated flight crew. Flowers?! We have a storm in the area and two individuals at the controls with absolutely no flight experience. Just a minute. There's a bee on that plane. I'm quite familiar with Mr. Benson and his no-account compadres. They've done enough damage. But isn't he your only hope? Technically, a bee shouldn't be able to fly at all. Their wings are too small... Haven't we heard this a million times? "The surface area of the wings and body mass make no sense." Get this on the air! Got it. Stand by. We're going live. The way we work may be a mystery to you. Making honey takes a lot of bees doing a lot of small jobs. But let me tell you about a small job. If you do it well, it makes a big difference. More than we realized. To us, to everyone. That's why I want to get bees back to working together. That's the bee way! We're not made of Jell-O. We get behind a fellow. Black and yellow! Hello! Left, right, down, hover. Hover? Forget hover. This isn't so hard. Beep-beep! Beep-beep! Barry, what happened?! Wait, I think we were on autopilot the whole time. That may have been helping me. And now we're not! So it turns out I cannot fly a plane. All of you, let's get behind this fellow! Move it out! Move out! Our only chance is if I do what I'd do, you copy me with the wings of the plane! Don't have to yell. I'm not yelling! We're in a lot of trouble. It's very hard to concentrate with that panicky tone in your voice! It's not a tone. I'm panicking! I can't do this! Vanessa, pull yourself together. You have to snap out of it! You snap out of it. You snap out of it. You snap out of it! You snap out of it! You snap out of it! You snap out of it! You snap out of it! You snap out of it! Hold it! Why? Come on, it's my turn. How is the plane flying? I don't know. Hello? Benson, got any flowers for a happy occasion in there? The Pollen Jocks! They do get behind a fellow. Black and yellow. Hello. All right, let's drop this tin can on the blacktop. Where? I can't see anything. Can you? No, nothing. It's all cloudy. Come on. You got to think bee, Barry. Thinking bee. Thinking bee. Thinking bee! Thinking bee! Thinking bee! Wait a minute. I think I'm feeling something. What? I don't know. It's strong, pulling me. Like a 27-million-year-old instinct. Bring the nose down. Thinking bee! Thinking bee! Thinking bee! What in the world is on the tarmac? Get some lights on that! Thinking bee! Thinking bee! Thinking bee! Vanessa, aim for the flower. OK. Cut the engines. We're going in on bee power. Ready, boys? Affirmative! Good. Good. Easy, now. That's it. Land on that flower! Ready? Full reverse! Spin it around! Not that flower! The other one! Which one? That flower. I'm aiming at the flower! That's a fat guy in a flowered shirt. I mean the giant pulsating flower made of millions of bees! Pull forward. Nose down. Tail up. Rotate around it. This is insane, Barry! This's the only way I know how to fly. Am I koo-koo-kachoo, or is this plane flying in an insect-like pattern? Get your nose in there. Don't be afraid. Smell it. Full reverse! Just drop it. Be a part of it. Aim for the center! Now drop it in! Drop it in, woman! Come on, already. Barry, we did it! You taught me how to fly! Yes. No high-five! Right. Barry, it worked! Did you see the giant flower? What giant flower? Where? Of course I saw the flower! That was genius! Thank you. But we're not done yet. Listen, everyone! This runway is covered with the last pollen from the last flowers available anywhere on Earth. That means this is our Last Chance. We're the only ones who make honey, pollinate flowers and dress like this. If we're gonna survive as a species, this is our moment! What do you say? Are we going to be bees, or just Museum of Natural History keychains? We're bees! Keychain! Then follow me! Except Keychain. Hold on, Barry. Here. You've earned this. Yeah! I'm a Pollen Jock! And it's a perfect fit. All I gotta do are the sleeves. Oh, yeah. That's our Barry. Mom! The bees are back! If anybody needs to make a call, now's the time. I got a feeling we'll be working late tonight! Here's your change. Have a great afternoon! Can I help who's next? Would you like some honey with that? It is bee-approved. Don't forget these. Milk, cream, cheese, it's all me.  And I don't see a nickel! Sometimes I just feel like a piece of meat! I had no idea. Barry, I'm sorry. Have you got a moment? Would you excuse me? My mosquito associate will help you. Sorry I'm late. He's a lawyer too? I was already a blood-sucking parasite. All I needed was a briefcase. Have a great afternoon! Barry, I just got this huge tulip order, and I can't get them anywhere. No problem, Vannie. Just leave it to me. You're a lifesaver, Barry. Can I help who's next? All right, scramble, jocks! It's time to fly. Thank you, Barry! That bee is living my life! Let it go, Kenny. When will this nightmare end?! Let it all go. Beautiful day to fly. Sure is. Between you and me, I was dying to get out of that office. You have got to start thinking bee, my friend. Thinking bee! Me? Hold it. Let's just stop for a second. Hold it. I'm sorry. I'm sorry, everyone. Can we stop here? I'm not making a major life decision during a production number! All right. Take ten, everybody. Wrap it up, guys. I had virtually no rehearsal for that.

wow you made it, good job

[that-bi-bitch-writes]

According to all known laws of aviation, there is no way a bee should be able to fly. Its wings are too small to get its fat little body off the ground. The bee, of course, flies anyway because bees don't care what humans think is impossible. Yellow, black. Yellow, black. Yellow, black. Yellow, black. Ooh, black and yellow! Let's shake it up a little. Barry! Breakfast is ready! Coming! Hang on a second. Hello? Barry? Adam? Can you believe this is happening? I can't. I'll pick you up. Looking sharp. Use the stairs, Your father paid good money for those. Sorry. I'm excited. Here's the graduate. We're very proud of you, son. A perfect report card, all B's. Very proud. Ma! I got a thing going here. You got lint on your fuzz. Ow! That's me! Wave to us! We'll be in row 118,000. Bye! Barry, I told you, stop flying in the house! Hey, Adam. Hey, Barry. Is that fuzz gel? A little. Special day, graduation. Never thought I'd make it. Three days grade school, three days high school. Those were awkward. Three days college. I'm glad I took a day and hitchhiked around The Hive. You did come back different. Hi, Barry. Artie, growing a mustache? Looks good. Hear about Frankie? Yeah. You going to the funeral? No, I'm not going. Everybody knows, sting someone, you die. Don't waste it on a squirrel. Such a hothead. I guess he could have just gotten out of the way. I love this incorporating an amusement park into our day. That's why we don't need vacations. Boy, quite a bit of pomp under the circumstances. Well, Adam, today we are men. We are! Bee-men. Amen! Hallelujah! Students, faculty, distinguished bees, please welcome Dean Buzzwell. Welcome, New Hive City graduating class of 9:15. That concludes our ceremonies And begins your career at Honex Industries! Will we pick our job today? I heard it's just orientation. Heads up! Here we go. Keep your hands and antennas inside the tram at all times. Wonder what it'll be like? A little scary. Welcome to Honex, a division of Honesco and a part of the Hexagon Group. This is it! Wow. Wow. We know that you, as a bee, have worked your whole life to get to the point where you can work for your whole life. Honey begins when our valiant Pollen Jocks bring the nectar to The Hive. Our top-secret formula is automatically color-corrected, scent-adjusted and bubble-contoured into this soothing sweet syrup with its distinctive golden glow you know as... Honey! That girl was hot. She's my cousin! She is? Yes, we're all cousins. Right. You're right. At Honex, we constantly strive to improve every aspect of bee existence. These bees are stress-testing a new helmet technology. What do you think he makes? Not enough. Here we have our latest advancement, the Krelman. What does that do? Catches that little strand of honey that hangs after you pour it. Saves us millions. Can anyone work on the Krelman? Of course. Most bee jobs are small ones. But bees know that every small job, if it's done well, means a lot. But choose carefully because you'll stay in the job you pick for the rest of your life. The same job the rest of your life? I didn't know that. What's the difference? You'll be happy to know that bees, as a species, haven't had one day off in 27 million years. So you'll just work us to death? We'll sure try. Wow! That blew my mind! "What's the difference?" How can you say that? One job forever? That's an insane choice to have to make. I'm relieved. Now we only have to make one decision in life. But, Adam, how could they never have told us that? Why would you question anything? We're bees. We're the most perfectly functioning society on Earth. You ever think maybe things work a little too well here? Like what? Give me one example. I don't know. But you know what I'm talking about. Please clear the gate. Royal Nectar Force on approach. Wait a second. Check it out. Hey, those are Pollen Jocks! Wow. I've never seen them this close. They know what it's like outside The Hive. Yeah, but some don't come back. Hey, Jocks! Hi, Jocks! You guys did great! You're monsters! You're sky freaks! I love it! I love it! I wonder

where they were. I don't know. Their day's not planned. Outside The Hive, flying who knows where, doing who knows what. You can't just decide to be a Pollen Jock. You have to be bred for that. Right. Look. That's more pollen than you and I will see in a lifetime. It's just a status symbol. Bees make too much of it. Perhaps. Unless you're wearing it and the ladies see you wearing it. Those ladies? Aren't they our cousins too? Distant. Distant. Look at these two. Couple of Hive Harrys. Let's have fun with them. It must be dangerous being a Pollen Jock. Yeah. Once a bear pinned me against a mushroom! He had a paw on my throat, and with the other, he was slapping me! Oh, my! I never thought I'd knock him out. What were you doing during this? Trying to alert the authorities. I can autograph that. A little gusty out there today, wasn't it, comrades? Yeah. Gusty. We're hitting a sunflower patch six miles from here tomorrow. Six miles, huh? Barry! A puddle jump for us, but maybe you're not up for it. Maybe I am. You are not! We're going 0900 at J-Gate. What do you think, buzzy-boy? Are you bee enough? I might be. It all depends on what 0900 means. Hey, Honex! Dad, you surprised me. You decide what you're interested in? Well, there's a lot of choices. But you only get one. Do you ever get bored doing the same job every day? Son, let me tell you about stirring. You grab that stick, and you just move it around, and you stir it around. You get yourself into a rhythm. It's a beautiful thing. You know, Dad, the more I think about it, maybe the honey field just isn't right for me. You were thinking of what, making balloon animals? That's a bad job for a guy with a stinger. Janet, your son's not sure he wants to go into honey! Barry, you are so funny sometimes. I'm not trying to be funny. You're not funny! You're going into honey. Our son, the stirrer! You're gonna be a stirrer? No one's listening to me! Wait till you see the sticks I have. I could say anything right now. I'm gonna get an ant tattoo! Let's open some honey and celebrate! Maybe I'll pierce my thorax. Shave my antennae. Shack up with a grasshopper. Get a gold tooth and call everybody "dawg"! I'm so proud. We're starting work today! Today's the day. Come on! All the good jobs will be gone. Yeah, right. Pollen counting, stunt bee, pouring, stirrer, front desk, hair removal... Is it still available? Hang on. Two left! One of them's yours! Congratulations! Step to the side. What'd you get? Picking crud out. Stellar! Wow! Couple of newbies? Yes, sir! Our first day! We are ready! Make your choice. You want to go first? No, you go. Oh, my. What's available? Restroom attendant's open, not for the reason you think. Any chance of getting the Krelman? Sure, you're on. I'm sorry, the Krelman just closed out. Wax monkey's always open. The Krelman opened up again. What happened? A bee died. Makes an opening. See? He's dead. Another dead one. Deady. Deadified. Two more dead. Dead from the neck up. Dead from the neck down. That's life! Oh, this is so hard! Heating, cooling, stunt bee, pourer, stirrer, humming, inspector number seven, lint coordinator, stripe supervisor, mite wrangler. Barry, what do you think I should... Barry? Barry! All right, we've got the sunflower patch in quadrant nine... What happened to you? Where are you? I'm going out. Out? Out where? Out there. Oh, no! I have to, before I go to work for the rest of my life. You're gonna die! You're crazy! Hello? Another call coming in. If anyone's feeling brave, there's a Korean deli on 83rd that gets their roses today. Hey, guys. Look at that. Isn't that the kid we saw yesterday? Hold it, son, flight deck's restricted. It's OK, Lou. We're gonna take him up. Really? Feeling lucky, are you? Sign here, here. Just initial that. Thank you. OK. You got a rain advisory today, and as you all know, bees cannot fly in rain. So be careful. As always, watch your brooms, hockey sticks, dogs, birds, bears and bats. Also, I got a couple of reports of root beer being poured on us. Murphy's in a home because of it, babbling like a cicada!

That's awful. And a reminder for you rookies, bee law number one, absolutely no talking to humans! All right, launch positions! Buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz! Buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz! Buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz! Black and yellow! Hello! You ready for this, hot shot? Yeah. Yeah, bring it on. Wind, check. Antennae, check. Nectar pack, check. Wings, check. Stinger, check. Scared out of my shorts, check. OK, ladies, let's move it out! Pound those petunias, you striped stem-suckers! All of you, drain those flowers! Wow! I'm out! I can't believe I'm out! So blue. I feel so fast and free! Box kite! Wow! Flowers! This is Blue Leader, We have roses visual. Bring it around 30 degrees and hold. Roses! 30 degrees, roger. Bringing it around. Stand to the side, kid. It's got a bit of a kick. That is one nectar collector! Ever see pollination up close? No, sir. I pick up some pollen here, sprinkle it over here. Maybe a dash over there, a pinch on that one. See that? It's a little bit of magic. That's amazing. Why do we do that? That's pollen power. More pollen, more flowers, more nectar, more honey for us. Cool. I'm picking up a lot of bright yellow, Could be daisies, Don't we need those? Copy that visual. Wait. One of these flowers seems to be on the move. Say again? You're reporting a moving flower? Affirmative. That was on the line! This is the coolest. What is it? I don't know, but I'm loving this color. It smells good. Not like a flower, but I like it. Yeah, fuzzy. Chemical-y. Careful, guys. It's a little grabby. My sweet lord of bees! Candy-brain, get off there! Problem! Guys! This could be bad. Affirmative. Very close. Gonna hurt. Mama's little boy. You are way out of position, rookie! Coming in at you like a missile! Help me! I don't think these are flowers. Should we tell him? I think he knows. What is this?! Match point! You can start packing up, honey, because you're about to eat it! Yowser! Gross. There's a bee in the car! Do something! I'm driving! Hi, bee. He's back here! He's going to sting me! Nobody move. If you don't move, he won't sting you. Freeze! He blinked! Spray him, Granny! What are you doing?! Wow... the tension level out here is unbelievable. I gotta get home. Can't fly in rain. Can't fly in rain. Can't fly in rain. Mayday! Mayday! Bee going down! Ken, could you close the window please? Ken, could you close the window please? Check out my new resume. I made it into a fold-out brochure. You see? Folds out. Oh, no. More humans. I don't need this. What was that? Maybe this time. This time. This time. This time! This time! This... Drapes! That is diabolical. It's fantastic. It's got all my special skills, even my top-ten favorite movies. What's number one? Star Wars? Nah, I don't go for that... kind of stuff. No wonder we shouldn't talk to them. They're out of their minds. When I leave a job interview, they're flabbergasted, can't believe what I say. There's the sun. Maybe that's a way out. I don't remember the sun having a big 75 on it. I predicted global warming. I could feel it getting hotter. At first I thought it was just me. Wait! Stop! Bee! Stand back. These are winter boots. Wait! Don't kill him! You know I'm allergic to them! This thing could kill me! Why does his life have less value than yours? Why does his life have any less value than mine? Is that your statement? I'm just saying all life has value. You don't know what he's capable of feeling. My brochure! There you go, little guy. I'm not scared of him.It's an allergic thing. Put that on your resume brochure. My whole face could puff up. Make it one of your special skills. Knocking someone out is also a special skill. Right. Bye, Vanessa. Thanks. Vanessa, next week? Yogurt night? Sure, Ken. You know, whatever. You could put carob chips on there. Bye. Supposed to be less calories. Bye. I gotta say something. She saved my life. I gotta say something. All right, here it goes. Nah. What would I say? I could really get in trouble. It's a bee law. You're not supposed to talk to a human. I can't believe I'm doing this. I've got to. Oh, I can't do it. Come on! No.

Yes. No. Do it. I can't. How should I start it? "You like jazz?" No, that's no good. Here she comes! Speak, you fool! Hi! I'm sorry. You're talking. Yes, I know. You're talking! I'm so sorry. No, it's OK. It's fine. I know I'm dreaming. But I don't recall going to bed. Well, I'm sure this is very disconcerting. This is a bit of a surprise to me. I mean, you're a bee! I am. And I'm not supposed to be doing this, but they were all trying to kill me. And if it wasn't for you... I had to thank you. It's just how I was raised. That was a little weird. I'm talking with a bee. Yeah. I'm talking to a bee. And the bee is talking to me! I just want to say I'm grateful. I'll leave now. Wait! How did you learn to do that? What? The talking thing. Same way you did, I guess. "Mama, Dada, honey." You pick it up. That's very funny. Yeah. Bees are funny. If we didn't laugh, we'd cry with what we have to deal with. Anyway... Can I... get you something? Like what? I don't know. I mean... I don't know. Coffee? I don't want to put you out. It's no trouble. It takes two minutes. It's just coffee. I hate to impose. Don't be ridiculous! Actually, I would love a cup. Hey, you want rum cake? I shouldn't. Have some. No, I can't. Come on! I'm trying to lose a couple micrograms. Where? These stripes don't help. You look great! I don't know if you know anything about fashion. Are you all right? No. He's making the tie in the cab as they're flying up Madison. He finally gets there. He runs up the steps into the church. The wedding is on. And he says, "Watermelon? I thought you said Guatemalan. Why would I marry a watermelon?" Is that a bee joke? That's the kind of stuff we do. Yeah, different. So, what are you gonna do, Barry? About work? I don't know. I want to do my part for The Hive, but I can't do it the way they want. I know how you feel. You do? Sure. My parents wanted me to be a lawyer or a doctor, but I wanted to be a florist. Really? My only interest is flowers. Our new queen was just elected with that same campaign slogan. Anyway, if you look... There's my hive right there. See it? You're in Sheep Meadow! Yes! I'm right off the Turtle Pond! No way! I know that area. I lost a toe ring there once. Why do girls put rings on their toes? Why not? It's like putting a hat on your knee. Maybe I'll try that. You all right, ma'am? Oh, yeah. Fine. Just having two cups of coffee! Anyway, this has been great. Thanks for the coffee. Yeah, it's no trouble. Sorry I couldn't finish it. If I did, I'd be up the rest of my life. Are you...? Can I take a piece of this with me? Sure! Here, have a crumb. Thanks! Yeah. All right. Well, then... I guess I'll see you around. Or not. OK, Barry. And thank you so much again... for before. Oh, that? That was nothing. Well, not nothing, but... Anyway... This can't possibly work. He's all set to go. We may as well try it. OK, Dave, pull the chute. Sounds amazing. It was amazing! It was the scariest, happiest moment of my life. Humans! I can't believe you were with humans! Giant, scary humans! What were they like? Huge and crazy. They talk crazy. They eat crazy giant things. They drive crazy. Do they try and kill you, like on TV? Some of them. But some of them don't. How'd you get back? Poodle. You did it, and I'm glad. You saw whatever you wanted to see. You had your "experience." Now you can pick out yourjob and be normal. Well... Well? Well, I met someone. You did? Was she Bee-ish? A wasp?! Your parents will kill you! No, no, no, not a wasp. Spider? I'm not attracted to spiders. I know it's the hottest thing, with the eight legs and all. I can't get by that face. So who is she? She's... human. No, no. That's a bee law. You wouldn't break a bee law. Her name's Vanessa. Oh, boy. She's so nice. And she's a florist! Oh, no! You're dating a human florist! We're not dating. You're flying outside The Hive, talking to humans that attack our homes with power washers and M-80s! One-eighth a stick of dynamite! She saved my life! And she understands me. This is over! Eat this. This is not over! What was that? They call it a crumb.

It was so stingin' stripey! And that's not what they eat. That's what falls off what they eat! You know what a Cinnabon is? No. It's bread and cinnamon and frosting. They heat it up... Sit down! ...really hot! Listen to me! We are not them! We're us. There's us and there's them! Yes, but who can deny the heart that is yearning? There's no yearning. Stop yearning. Listen to me! You have got to start thinking bee, my friend. Thinking bee! Thinking bee. Thinking bee. Thinking bee! Thinking bee! Thinking bee! Thinking bee! There he is. He's in the pool. You know what your problem is, Barry? I gotta start thinking bee? How much longer will this go on? It's been three days! Why aren't you working? I've got a lot of big life decisions to think about. What life? You have no life! You have no job. You're barely a bee! Would it kill you to make a little honey? Barry, come out. Your father's talking to you. Martin, would you talk to him? Barry, I'm talking to you! You coming? Got everything? All set! Go ahead. I'll catch up. Don't be too long. Watch this! Vanessa! We're still here. I told you not to yell at him. He doesn't respond to yelling! Then why yell at me? Because you don't listen! I'm not listening to this. Sorry, I've gotta go. Where are you going? I'm meeting a friend. A girl? Is this why you can't decide? Bye. I just hope she's Bee-ish. They have a huge parade of flowers every year in Pasadena? To be in the Tournament of Roses, that's every florist's dream! Up on a float, surrounded by flowers, crowds cheering. A tournament. Do the roses compete in athletic events? No. All right, I've got one. How come you don't fly everywhere? It's exhausting. Why don't you run everywhere? It's faster. Yeah, OK, I see, I see. All right, your turn. TiVo. You can just freeze live TV? That's insane! You don't have that? We have Hivo, but it's a disease. It's a horrible, horrible disease. Oh, my. Dumb bees! You must want to sting all those jerks. We try not to sting. It's usually fatal for us. So you have to watch your temper. Very carefully. You kick a wall, take a walk, write an angry letter and throw it out. Work through it like any emotion: Anger, jealousy, lust. Oh, my goodness! Are you OK? Yeah. What is wrong with you?! It's a bug. He's not bothering anybody. Get out of here, you creep! What was that? A Pic 'N' Save circular? Yeah, it was. How did you know? It felt like about 10 pages. Seventy-five is pretty much our limit. You've really got that down to a science. I lost a cousin to Italian Vogue. I'll bet. What in the name of Mighty Hercules is this? How did this get here? cute Bee, Golden Blossom, Ray Liotta Private Select? Is he that actor? I never heard of him. Why is this here? For people. We eat it. You don't have enough food of your own? Well, yes. How do you get it? Bees make it. I know who makes it! And it's hard to make it! There's heating, cooling, stirring. You need a whole Krelman thing! It's organic. It's our-ganic! It's just honey, Barry. Just what?! Bees don't know about this! This is stealing! A lot of stealing! You've taken our homes, schools,hospitals! This is all we have! And it's on sale?! I'm getting to the bottom of this. I'm getting to the bottom of all of this! Hey, Hector. You almost done? Almost. He is here. I sense it. Well, I guess I'll go home now and just leave this nice honey out, with no one around. You're busted, box boy! I knew I heard something. So you can talk! I can talk. And now you'll start talking! Where you getting the sweet stuff? Who's your supplier? I don't understand. I thought we were friends. The last thing we want to do is upset bees! You're too late! It's ours now! You, sir, have crossed the wrong sword! You, sir, will be lunch for my iguana, Ignacio! Where is the honey coming from? Tell me where! Honey Farms! It comes from Honey Farms! Crazy person! What horrible thing has happened here? These faces, they never knew what hit them. And now they're on the road to nowhere! Just keep still. What? You're not dead? Do I look dead? They will wipe anything that moves. Where you headed? To

Honey Farms. I am onto something huge here. I'm going to Alaska. Moose blood, crazy stuff. Blows your head off! I'm going to Tacoma. And you? He really is dead. All right. Uh-oh! What is that?! Oh, no! A wiper! Triple blade! Triple blade? Jump on! It's your only chance, bee! Why does everything have to be so doggone clean?! How much do you people need to see?! Open your eyes! Stick your head out the window! From NPR News in Washington, I'm Carl Kasell. But don't kill no more bugs! Bee! Moose blood guy!! You hear something? Like what? Like tiny screaming. Turn off the radio. Whassup, bee boy? Hey, Blood. Just a row of honey jars, as far as the eye could see. Wow! I assume wherever this truck goes is where they're getting it. I mean, that honey's ours. Bees hang tight. We're all jammed in. It's a close community. Not us, man. We on our own. Every mosquito on his own. What if you get in trouble? You a mosquito, you in trouble. Nobody likes us. They just smack. See a mosquito, smack, smack! At least you're out in the world. You must meet girls. Mosquito girls try to trade up, get with a moth, dragonfly. Mosquito girl don't want no mosquito. You got to be kidding me! Mooseblood's about to leave the building! So long, bee! Hey, guys! Mooseblood! I knew I'd catch y'all down here. Did you bring your crazy straw? We throw it in jars, slap a label on it, and it's pretty much pure profit. What is this place? A bee's got a brain the size of a pinhead. They are pinheads! Pinhead. Check out the new smoker. Oh, sweet. That's the one you want. The Thomas 3000! Smoker? Ninety puffs a minute, semi-automatic. Twice the nicotine, all the tar. A couple breaths of this knocks them right out. They make the honey, and we make the money. "They make the honey, and we make the money"? Oh, my! What's going on? Are you OK? Yeah. It doesn't last too long. Do you know you're in a fake hive with fake walls? Our queen was moved here. We had no choice. This is your queen? That's a man in women's clothes! That's a drag queen! What is this? Oh, no! There's hundreds of them! Bee honey. Our honey is being brazenly stolen on a massive scale! This is worse than anything bears have done! I intend to do something. Oh, Barry, stop. Who told you humans are taking our honey? That's a rumor. Do these look like rumors? That's a conspiracy theory. These are obviously doctored photos. How did you get mixed up in this? He's been talking to humans. What? Talking to humans?! He has a human girlfriend. And they make out! Make out? Barry! We do not. You wish you could. Whose side are you on? The bees! I dated a cricket once in San Antonio. Those crazy legs kept me up all night. Barry, this is what you want to do with your life? I want to do it for all our lives. Nobody works harder than bees! Dad, I remember you coming home so overworked your hands were still stirring. You couldn't stop. I remember that. What right do they have to our honey? We live on two cups a year. They put it in lip balm for no reason whatsoever! Even if it's true, what can one bee do? Sting them where it really hurts. In the face! The eye! That would hurt. No. Up the nose? That's a killer. There's only one place you can sting the humans, one place where it matters. Hive at Five, The Hive's only full-hour action news source. No more bee beards! With Bob Bumble at the anchor desk. Weather with Storm Stinger. Sports with Buzz Larvi. And Jeanette Chung. Good evening. I'm Bob Bumble. And I'm Jeanette Ohung. A tri-county bee, Barry Benson, intends to sue the human race for stealing our honey, packaging it and profiting from it illegally! Tomorrow night on Bee Larry King, we'll have three former queens here in our studio, discussing their new book, classy Ladies, out this week on Hexagon. Tonight we're talking to Barry Benson. Did you ever think, "I'm a kid from The Hive. I can't do this"? Bees have never been afraid to change the world. What about Bee Oolumbus? Bee Gandhi? Bejesus? Where I'm from, we'd never sue humans. We were thinking of stickball or candy stores. How old are you? The bee community is

supporting you in this case, which will be the trial of the bee century. You know, they have a Larry King in the human world too. It's a common name. Next week... He looks like you and has a show and suspenders and colored dots... Next week... Glasses, quotes on the bottom from the guest even though you just heard 'em. Bear Week next week! They're scary, hairy and here live. Always leans forward, pointy shoulders, squinty eyes, very Jewish. In tennis, you attack at the point of weakness! It was my grandmother, Ken. She's 81. Honey, her backhand's a joke! I'm not gonna take advantage of that? Quiet, please. Actual work going on here. Is that that same bee? Yes, it is! I'm helping him sue the human race. Hello. Hello, bee. This is Ken. Yeah, I remember you. Timberland, size ten and a half. Vibram sole, I believe. Why does he talk again? Listen, you better go 'cause we're really busy working. But it's our yogurt night! Bye-bye. Why is yogurt night so difficult?! You poor thing. You two have been at this for hours! Yes, and Adam here has been a huge help. Frosting... How many sugars? Just one. I try not to use the competition. So why are you helping me? Bees have good qualities. And it takes my mind off the shop. Instead of flowers, people are giving balloon bouquets now. Those are great, if you're three. And artificial flowers. Oh, those just get me psychotic! Yeah, me too. Bent stingers, pointless pollination. Bees must hate those fake things! Nothing worse than a daffodil that's had work done. Maybe this could make up for it a little bit. This lawsuit's a pretty big deal. I guess. You sure you want to go through with it? Am I sure? When I'm done with the humans, they won't be able to say, "Honey, I'm home," without paying a royalty! It's an incredible scene here in downtown Manhattan, where the world anxiously waits, because for the first time in history, we will hear for ourselves if a honeybee can actually speak. What have we gotten into here, Barry? It's pretty big, isn't it? I can't believe how many humans don't work during the day. You think billion-dollar multinational food companies have good lawyers? Everybody needs to stay behind the barricade. What's the matter? I don't know, I just got a chill. Well, if it isn't the bee team. You boys work on this? All rise! The Honorable Judge Bumbleton presiding. All right. Case number 4475, Superior Court of New York, Barry Bee Benson v. the Honey Industry is now in session. Mr. Montgomery, you're representing the five food companies collectively? A privilege. Mr. Benson... you're representing all the bees of the world? I'm kidding. Yes, Your Honor, we're ready to proceed. Mr. Montgomery, your opening statement, please. Ladies and gentlemen of the jury, my grandmother was a simple woman. Born on a farm, she believed it was man's divine right to benefit from the bounty of nature God put before us. If we lived in the topsy-turvy world Mr. Benson imagines, just think of what would it mean. I would have to negotiate with the silkworm for the elastic in my britches! Talking bee! How do we know this isn't some sort of holographic motion-picture-capture Hollywood wizardry? They could be using laser beams! Robotics! Ventriloquism! Cloning! For all we know, he could be on steroids! Mr. Benson? Ladies and gentlemen, there's no trickery here. I'm just an ordinary bee. Honey's pretty important to me. It's important to all bees. We invented it! We make it. And we protect it with our lives. Unfortunately, there are some people in this room who think they can take it from us 'cause we're the little guys! I'm hoping that, after this is all over, you'll see how, by taking our honey, you not only take everything we have but everything we are! I wish he'd dress like that all the time. So nice! Call your first witness. So, Mr. Klauss Vanderhayden of Honey Farms, big company you have. I suppose so. I see you also own Honeyburton and Honron! Yes, they provide beekeepers for our farms. Beekeeper. I find that to be a very disturbing term. I don't imagine you employ any bee-free-ers, do you? No. I

couldn't hear you. No. No. Because you don't free bees. You keep bees. Not only that, it seems you thought a bear would be an appropriate image for a jar of honey. They're very lovable creatures. Yogi Bear, Fozzie Bear, Build-A-Bear. You mean like this? Bears kill bees! How'd you like his head crashing through your living room?! Biting into your couch! Spitting out your throw pillows! OK, that's enough. Take him away. So, Mr. Sting, thank you for being here. Your name intrigues me. Where have I heard it before? I was with a band called The Police. But you've never been a police officer, have you? No, I haven't. No, you haven't. And so here we have yet another example of bee culture casually stolen by a human for nothing more than a prance-about stage name. Oh, please. Have you ever been stung, Mr. Sting? Because I'm feeling a little stung, Sting. Or should I say... Mr. Gordon M. Sumner! That's not his real name?! You idiots! Mr. Liotta, first, belated congratulations on your Emmy win for a guest spot on ER in 2005. Thank you. Thank you. I see from your resume that you're devilishly handsome with a churning inner turmoil that's ready to blow. I enjoy what I do. Is that a crime? Not yet it isn't. But is this what it's come to for you? Exploiting tiny, helpless bees so you don't have to rehearse your part and learn your lines, sir? Watch it, Benson! I could blow right now! This isn't a goodfella. This is a badfella! Why doesn't someone just step on this creep, and we can all go home?! Order in this court! You're all thinking it! Order! Order, I say! Say it! Mr. Liotta, please sit down! I think it was awfully nice of that bear to pitch in like that. I think the jury's on our side. Are we doing everything right, legally? I'm a florist. Right. Well, here's to a great team. To a great team! Well, hello. Ken! Hello. I didn't think you were coming. No, I was just late I tried to call, but... the battery. I didn't want all this to go to waste, so I called Barry. Luckily, he was free. Oh, that was lucky. There's a little left. I could heat it up. Yeah, heat it up, sure, whatever. So I hear you're quite a tennis player. I'm not much for the game myself. The ball's a little grabby. That's where I usually sit. Right... there. Ken, Barry was looking at your resume, and he agreed with me that eating with chopsticks isn't really a special skill. You think I don't see what you're doing? I know how hard it is to find the right job. We have that in common. Do we? Bees have 100 percent employment, but we do jobs like taking the crud out. That's just what I was thinking about doing. Ken, I let Barry borrow your razor for his fuzz. I hope that was all right. I'm going to drain the old stinger. Yeah, you do that. Look at that. You know, I've just about had it with your little Mind Games. What's that? Italian Vogue. Mamma mia, that's a lot of pages. A lot of ads. Remember what Van said, why is your life more valuable than mine? Funny, I just can't seem to recall that! I think something stinks in here! I love the smell of flowers. How do you like the smell of flames?! Not as much. Water bug! Not taking sides! Ken, I'm wearing a Chapstick hat! This is pathetic! I've got issues! Well, well, well, a royal flush! You're bluffing. Am I? Surf's up, dude! Poo water! That bowl is gnarly. Except for those dirty yellow rings! Kenneth! What are you doing?! You know, I don't even like honey! I don't eat it! We need to talk! He's just a little bee! And he happens to be the nicest bee I've met in a long time! Long time? What are you talking about?! Are there other bugs in your life? No, but there are other things bugging me in life. And you're one of them! Fine! Talking bees, no yogurt night... My nerves are fried from riding on this emotional roller coaster! Goodbye, Ken. And for your information, I prefer sugar-free, artificial sweeteners made by man! I'm sorry about all that. I know it's got an aftertaste! I like it! I always felt there was some kind of barrier between Ken and me. I couldn't overcome it. Oh, well. Are you OK for the trial? I believe Mr.

Montgomery is about out of ideas. We would like to call Mr. Barry Benson Bee to the stand. Good idea! You can really see why he's considered one of the best lawyers... Yeah. Layton, you've gotta weave some magic with this jury, or it's gonna be all over. Don't worry. The only thing I have to do to turn this jury around is to remind them of what they don't like about bees. You got the tweezers? Are you allergic? Only to losing, son. Only to losing. Mr. Benson Bee, I'll ask you what I think we'd all like to know. What exactly is your relationship to that woman? We're friends. Good friends? Yes. How good? Do you live together? Wait a minute... Are you her little... bedbug? I've seen a bee documentary or two. From what I understand, doesn't your queen give birth to all the bee children? Yeah, but... So those aren't your real parents! Oh, Barry... Yes, they are! Hold me back! You're an illegitimate bee, aren't you, Benson? He's denouncing bees! Don't y'all date your cousins? Objection! I'm going to pincushion this guy! Adam, don't! It's what he wants! Oh, I'm hit!! Oh, lordy, I am hit! Order! Order! The venom! The venom is coursing through my veins! I have been felled by a winged beast of destruction! You see? You can't treat them like equals! They're striped savages! Stinging's the only thing they know! It's their way! Adam, stay with me. I can't feel my legs. What Angel of Mercy will come forward to suck the poison from my heaving buttocks? I will have order in this court. Order! Order, please! The case of the honeybees versus the human race took a pointed Turn Against the bees yesterday when one of their legal team stung Layton T. Montgomery. Hey, buddy. Hey. Is there much pain? Yeah. I... I blew the whole case, didn't I? It doesn't matter. What matters is you're alive. You could have died. I'd be better off dead. Look at me. They got it from the cafeteria downstairs, in a tuna sandwich. Look, there's a little celery still on it. What was it like to sting someone? I can't explain it. It was all... All adrenaline and then...and then ecstasy! All right. You think it was all a trap? Of course. I'm sorry. I flew us right into this. What were we thinking? Look at us. We're just a couple of bugs in this world. What will the humans do to us if they win? I don't know. I hear they put the roaches in motels. That doesn't sound so bad. Adam, they check in, but they don't check out! Oh, my. Could you get a nurse to close that window? Why? The smoke. Bees don't smoke. Right. Bees don't smoke. Bees don't smoke! But some bees are smoking. That's it! That's our case! It is? It's not over? Get dressed. I've gotta go somewhere. Get back to the court and stall. Stall any way you can. And assuming you've done step correctly, you're ready for the tub. Mr. Flayman. Yes? Yes, Your Honor! Where is the rest of your team? Well, Your Honor, it's interesting. Bees are trained to fly haphazardly, and as a result, we don't make very good time. I actually heard a funny story about... Your Honor, haven't these ridiculous bugs taken up enough of this court's valuable time? How much longer will we allow these absurd shenanigans to go on? They have presented no compelling evidence to support their charges against my clients, who run legitimate businesses. I move for a complete dismissal of this entire case! Mr. Flayman, I'm afraid I'm going to have to consider Mr. Montgomery's motion. But you can't! We have a terrific case. Where is your proof? Where is the evidence? Show me the smoking gun! Hold it, Your Honor! You want a smoking gun? Here is your smoking gun. What is that? It's a bee smoker! What, this? This harmless little contraption? This couldn't hurt a fly, let alone a bee. Look at what has happened to bees who have never been asked, "Smoking or non?" Is this what nature intended for us? To be forcibly addicted to smoke machines and man-made wooden slat work camps? Living out our lives as honey slaves to the white man? What are we gonna do? He's playing the species card. Ladies and gentlemen, please, free these bees! Free the bees! Free the bees!

Free the bees! Free the bees! Free the bees! The court finds in favor of the bees! Vanessa, we won! I knew you could do it! High-five! Sorry. I'm OK! You know what this means? All the honey will finally belong to the bees. Now we won't have to work so hard all the time. This is an unholy perversion of the balance of nature, Benson. You'll regret this. Barry, how much honey is out there? All right. One at a time. Barry, who are you wearing? My sweater is Ralph Lauren, and I have no pants. What if Montgomery's right? What do you mean? We've been living the bee way a long time, 27 million years. Congratulations on your victory. What will you demand as a settlement? First, we'll demand a complete shutdown of all bee work camps. Then we want back the honey that was ours to begin with, every last drop. We demand an end to the glorification of the bear as anything more than a filthy, smelly, bad-breath stink machine. We're all aware of what they do in the woods. Wait for my signal. Take him out. He'll have nauseous for a few hours, then he'll be fine. And we will no longer tolerate bee-negative nicknames... But it's just a prance-about stage name! ...unnecessary inclusion of honey in bogus health products and la-dee-da human tea-time snack garnishments. Can't breathe. Bring it in, boys! Hold it right there! Good. Tap it. Mr. Buzzwell, we just passed three cups and there's gallons more coming! I think we need to shut down! Shut down? We've never shut down. Shut down honey production! Stop making honey! Turn your key, sir! What do we do now? Cannonball! We're shutting honey production! Mission abort. Aborting pollination and nectar detail. Returning to base. Adam, you wouldn't believe how much honey was out there. Oh, yeah? What's going on? Where is everybody? Are they out celebrating? They're home. They don't know what to do. Laying out, sleeping in. I heard your Uncle Carl was on his way to San Antonio with a cricket. At least we got our honey back. Sometimes I think, so what if humans liked our honey? Who wouldn't? It's the greatest thing in the world! I was excited to be part of making it. This was my new desk. This was my new job. I wanted to do it really well. And now... Now I can't. I don't understand why they're not happy. I thought their lives would be better! They're doing nothing. It's amazing. Honey really changes people. You don't have any idea what's going on, do you? What did you want to show me? This. What happened here? That is not the half of it. Oh, no. Oh, my. They're all wilting. Doesn't look very good, does it? No. And whose fault do you think that is? You know, I'm gonna guess bees. Bees? Specifically, me. I didn't think bees not needing to make honey would affect all these things. It's not just flowers. Fruits, vegetables, they all need bees. That's our whole SAT test right there. Take away produce, that affects the entire animal kingdom. And then, of course... The human species? So if there's no more pollination, it could all just go south here, couldn't it? I know this is also partly my fault. How about a suicide pact? How do we do it? I'll sting you, you step on me. That just kills you twice. Right, right. Listen, Barry... sorry, but I gotta get going. I had to open my mouth and talk. Vanessa? Vanessa? Why are you leaving? Where are you going? To the final Tournament of Roses parade in Pasadena. They've moved it to this weekend because all the flowers are dying. It's the Last Chance I'll ever have to see it. Vanessa, I just wanna say I'm sorry. I never meant it to turn out like this. I know. Me neither. Tournament of Roses. Roses can't do sports. Wait a minute. Roses. Roses? Roses! Vanessa! Roses?! Barry? Roses are flowers! Yes, they are. Flowers, bees, pollen! I know. That's why this is the last parade. Maybe not. Could you ask him to slow down? Could you slow down? Barry! OK, I made a huge mistake. This is a total disaster, all my fault. Yes, it kind of is. I've ruined the planet. I wanted to help you with the flower shop. I've made it worse. Actually, it's completely closed down. I thought maybe

you were remodeling. But I have another idea, and it's greater than my previous ideas combined. I don't want to hear it! All right, they have the roses, the roses have the pollen. I know every bee, plant and flower bud in this park. All we gotta do is get what they've got back here with what we've got. Bees. Park. Pollen! Flowers. Repollination! Across the nation! Tournament of Roses, Pasadena, California. They've got nothing but flowers, floats and cotton candy. Security will be tight. I have an idea. Vanessa Bloome, FTD. Official floral business. It's real. Sorry, ma'am. Nice brooch. Thank you. It was a gift. Once inside, we just pick the right float. How about The Princess and the Pea? I could be the princess, and you could be the pea! Yes, I got it. Where should I sit? What are you? I believe I'm the pea. The pea? It goes under the mattresses. Not in this fairy tale, sweetheart. I'm getting the marshal. You do that! This whole parade is a fiasco! Let's see what this baby'll do. Hey, what are you doing?! Then all we do is blend in with traffic... without arousing suspicion. Once at the airport, there's no stopping us. Stop! Security. You and your insect pack your float? Yes. Has it been in your possession the entire time? Would you remove your shoes? Remove your stinger. It's part of me. I know. Just having some fun. Enjoy your flight. Then if we're lucky, we'll have just enough pollen to do the job. Can you believe how lucky we are? We have just enough pollen to do the job! I think this is gonna work. It's got to work. Attention, passengers, this is Captain Scott. We have a bit of bad weather in New York. It looks like we'll experience a couple hours delay. Barry, these are cut flowers with no water. They'll never make it. I gotta get up there and talk to them. Be careful. Can I get help with the Sky Mall magazine? I'd like to order the talking inflatable nose and ear hair trimmer. Captain, I'm in a real situation. What'd you say, Hal? Nothing. Bee! Don't freak out! My entire species... What are you doing? Wait a minute! I'm an attorney! Who's an attorney? Don't move. Oh, Barry. Good afternoon, passengers. This is your captain. Would a Miss Vanessa Bloome in 24B please report to the cockpit? And please hurry! What happened here? There was a DustBuster, a toupee, a life raft exploded. One's bald, one's in a boat, they're both unconscious! Is that another bee joke? No! No one's flying the plane! This is JFK control tower, Flight 356. What's your status? This is Vanessa Bloome. I'm a florist from New York. Where's the pilot? He's unconscious, and so is the copilot. Not good. Does anyone onboard have flight experience? As a matter of fact, there is. Who's that? Barry Benson. From the honey trial?! Oh, great. Vanessa, this is nothing more than a big metal bee. It's got giant wings, huge engines. I can't fly a plane. Why not? Isn't John Travolta a pilot? Yes. How hard could it be? Wait, Barry! We're headed into some lightning. This is Bob Bumble. We have some late-breaking news from JFK Airport, where a suspenseful scene is developing. Barry Benson, fresh from his legal victory... That's Barry! ...is attempting to land a plane, loaded with people, flowers and an incapacitated flight crew. Flowers?! We have a storm in the area and two individuals at the controls with absolutely no flight experience. Just a minute. There's a bee on that plane. I'm quite familiar with Mr. Benson and his no-account compadres. They've done enough damage. But isn't he your only hope? Technically, a bee shouldn't be able to fly at all. Their wings are too small... Haven't we heard this a million times? "The surface area of the wings and body mass make no sense." Get this on the air! Got it. Stand by. We're going live. The way we work may be a mystery to you. Making honey takes a lot of bees doing a lot of small jobs. But let me tell you about a small job. If you do it well, it makes a big difference. More than we realized. To us, to everyone. That's why I want to get bees back to working together. That's the bee way! We're not made of Jell-O.

We get behind a fellow. Black and yellow! Hello! Left, right, down, hover. Hover? Forget hover. This isn't so hard. Beep-beep! Beep-beep! Barry, what happened?! Wait, I think we were on autopilot the whole time. That may have been helping me. And now we're not! So it turns out I cannot fly a plane. All of you, let's get behind this fellow! Move it out! Move out! Our only chance is if I do what I'd do, you copy me with the wings of the plane! Don't have to yell. I'm not yelling! We're in a lot of trouble. It's very hard to concentrate with that panicky tone in your voice! It's not a tone. I'm panicking! I can't do this! Vanessa, pull yourself together. You have to snap out of it! You snap out of it. You snap out of it. You snap out of it! You snap out of it! You snap out of it! You snap out of it! You snap out of it! You snap out of it! Hold it! Why? Come on, it's my turn. How is the plane flying? I don't know. Hello? Benson, got any flowers for a happy occasion in there? The Pollen Jocks! They do get behind a fellow. Black and yellow. Hello. All right, let's drop this tin can on the blacktop. Where? I can't see anything. Can you? No, nothing. It's all cloudy. Come on. You got to think bee, Barry. Thinking bee. Thinking bee. Thinking bee! Thinking bee! Thinking bee! Wait a minute. I think I'm feeling something. What? I don't know. It's strong, pulling me. Like a 27-million-year-old instinct. Bring the nose down. Thinking bee! Thinking bee! Thinking bee! What in the world is on the tarmac? Get some lights on that! Thinking bee! Thinking bee! Thinking bee! Vanessa, aim for the flower. OK. Cut the engines. We're going in on bee power. Ready, boys? Affirmative! Good. Good. Easy, now. That's it. Land on that flower! Ready? Full reverse! Spin it around! Not that flower! The other one! Which one? That flower. I'm aiming at the flower! That's a fat guy in a flowered shirt. I mean the giant pulsating flower made of millions of bees! Pull forward. Nose down. Tail up. Rotate around it. This is insane, Barry! This's the only way I know how to fly. Am I koo-koo-kachoo, or is this plane flying in an insect-like pattern? Get your nose in there. Don't be afraid. Smell it. Full reverse! Just drop it. Be a part of it. Aim for the center! Now drop it in! Drop it in, woman! Come on, already. Barry, we did it! You taught me how to fly! Yes. No high-five! Right. Barry, it worked! Did you see the giant flower? What giant flower? Where? Of course I saw the flower! That was genius! Thank you. But we're not done yet. Listen, everyone! This runway is covered with the last pollen from the last flowers available anywhere on Earth. That means this is our Last Chance. We're the only ones who make honey, pollinate flowers and dress like this. If we're gonna survive as a species, this is our moment! What do you say? Are we going to be bees, or just Museum of Natural History keychains? We're bees! Keychain! Then follow me! Except Keychain. Hold on, Barry. Here. You've earned this. Yeah! I'm a Pollen Jock! And it's a perfect fit. All I gotta do are the sleeves. Oh, yeah. That's our Barry. Mom! The bees are back! If anybody needs to make a call, now's the time. I got a feeling we'll be working late tonight! Here's your change. Have a great afternoon! Can I help who's next? Would you like some honey with that? It is bee-approved. Don't forget these. Milk, cream, cheese, it's all me. And I don't see a nickel! Sometimes I just feel like a piece of meat! I had no idea. Barry, I'm sorry. Have you got a moment? Would you excuse me? My mosquito associate will help you. Sorry I'm late. He's a lawyer too? I was already a blood-sucking parasite. All I needed was a briefcase. Have a great afternoon! Barry, I just got this huge tulip order, and I can't get them anywhere. No problem, Vannie. Just leave it to me. You're a lifesaver, Barry. Can I help who's next? All right, scramble, jocks! It's time to fly. Thank you, Barry! That bee is living my life! Let it go, Kenny. When will this nightmare end?! Let it all go. Beautiful day to fly. Sure is. Between you and me, I

was dying to get out of that office. You have got to start thinking bee, my friend. Thinking bee! Me? Hold it. Let's just stop for a second. Hold it. I'm sorry. I'm sorry, everyone. Can we stop here? I'm not making a major life decision during a production number! All right. Take ten, everybody. Wrap it up, guys. I had virtually no rehearsal for that.

you are my least favorite. i read the first line and went "oh no" then i scrolled to make sure. and then i had to scroll all the way to the bottom to answer the ask.

2/10 would not recommend

[blackswallowtailbutterfly]

I just...want to work in the garden and do nothing else. Stop only to eat and pee. I go in when the daylight’s done. And then all I want to do is look at more plants I can order and talk about my garden. All my plants are native to Ontario or nearby. All with edible parts except one. So. Plant species I have/am getting this year are:

001. Achillea millefolium (common yarrow) The red-flowered cultivar seems to have died over the winter, but the non-cultivar is growing strong and is also creeping past the stone border to become one with the grass. lol

002. Actaea racemosa (black snakeroot/black cohosh) Next weekend!

003. Agastache foeniculum (anise hyssop) Literally migrated from the place I planted it to a place it likes better, I guess. As in, there is no plant where I planted, but there is an anise hyssop in another part of that bed. You do you.

004. Allium canadense (meadow garlic/Canada garlic) Spreading slowly but reliably and super tasty.

005. Allium cernuum (nodding onion) It has flowered each year--this is year 4--but hasn’t spread at all. Very tasty, and I’ve bought some friends to help it along.

006. Allium schoenoprasum (chives/wild chives) Absolutely yum and doing very well.

007. Allium stellatum (prairie onion/autumn onion) Hopefully coming by the end of this month!

008. Allium tricoccum (ramps/wild leek) It will be quite some time before it even makes flowers which hopefully let it spread, so I won’t be able to reap the benefits for a while. But, both plants did come up this year and have now died back as expected. Hopefully they’ll continue to come up.

009. Amelanchier canadensis (Canadian serviceberry) Caterpillars. Are. EATING IT. Gypsy moth caterpillars. This is going to be a problem for some time until they pupate, I guess. Plant’s generally okay, though. I won’t be getting fruit anytime soon, though.

010. Anaphalis margaritacea (pearly everlasting) Very healthy plants keeping the sunflowers under some control. This spring was my first year eating the shoots. Can’t say anything about the taste specifically, as they went into a pasta sauce, but that sauce was delicious.

011. Andromeda polifolia (bog rosemary) Next weekend!

012. Aquilegia brevistyla (smallflower columbine) Growing very well, more flowers this year. Next year I’ll eat some (flowers, only the flowers are edible).

013. Aquilegia canadensis (Canada columbine/red columbine) Flower stalk doesn’t seem as tall this year, but it still has a lot of flowers. They’re a lovely refreshing sweet snack (just the flowers).

014. Arabis alpina (alpine rockcress) Next weekend! I had one last year, but it didn’t survive the winter. The poor thing was so root-bound there was no soil in the pot, so I’m not surprised it didn’t make it. Hopefully the new one will be in better condition.

015. Arctostaphylos uva-ursi (bearberry/kinnikinnick/pinemat manzanita) Not doing great and I’m not sure why. That area is reasonably well-drained and it gets part sun, part shade. Oh well. Maybe I’ll move it to the hill in the back. It seemed to like the hill I had it on at my old apartment.

016. Argentina anserina (silverweed cinquefoil) Hopefully coming by the end of this month!

017. Arisaema triphyllum (jack-in-the-pulpit) It came up! I was sure it had died last year. But no, it’s fine. Male this year. Hopefully female next year (I’m trying to see if the berries can be dried into edibility like the corms, and if they can I want to make jam or something with them).

018. Armeria maritima (thrift sea-pink) Drooping! It’s a drought-tolerant plant that will die if over-watered so I don’t water it more than once a week and I don’t water deeply, but it’s been hot so maybe it needs more or maybe I managed to overwater it anyway. Frick. Flowering very nicely though.

019. Aronia melanocarpa (black chokeberry) Doing just fine. No flowers and I don’t expect them for another couple of years at least, but it’s growing well.

020. Artemisia frigida (prairie sagewort/fringed sagebrush) Already spreading in the bed. Should look very nice when it fills in.

021. Aruncus dioicus (bride’s feathers/goat’s beard/buck’s beard) Growing more quickly than the internet told me it would! And going to flower this year too, which will be lovely.

022. Asarum canadense (Canada ginger) Doing fine for now, but burnt a lot in the sun last year. Likely to do so again. I’m going to plant something in front of it to shade it better. See, I wouldn’t have put it there if it was full sun because it’s a shade to part sun plant, but that area isn’t full-sun, it’s part sun; however, the sunlight it does get is very strong in the summer and the poor thing gets burnt.

023. Asclepias incarnata (swamp milkweed) Growing like a beast! Flowers were gorgeous last year. I don’t expect this to be any different, and maybe some monarch butterflies will pay it a visit.

024. Asclepias ovalifolia (oval leaf milkweed/dwarf milkweed) Hopefully coming by the end of this month!

025. Asclepias syriaca (common milkweed) Mine seemed to come up much more slowly than those I’ve seen elsewhere, but it is a fairly young plant. I expect it will come up earlier next year. And it’s doing fine now.

026. Asclepias tuberosa (butterflyweed) Hasn’t come up yet, but they can take till middle of June to start emerging, so I’m not going to worry about it yet.

027. Asimina triloba (pawpaw) All three trees are alive, though with very different rates of growth. I got them at the same size at the same time, but in trying to figure out what the best thing was for them, I planted one on a hill next to the door of my at-the-time apartment, one by the fence at the opposite side of the yard, and the third I kept in a pot, which I brought in for the winter. That spring, the potted tree leafed out first at the end of April, and the one on the hill in the middle of May. The third didn’t bud at all. I continued to water it, but I was sure it was dead. Then the house my apartment was in caught fire so I had to go to a new place (same landlords, so still allowed to plant on the new property) and didn’t want to leave my plants behind. It was the end of June. All my plants were potted. and I was going to leave the lifeless stick behind AND THEN IT SUDDENLY HAD BUDS. So I potted it and took it too. All three survived the transplant, but the tree I had initially taken inside (but is now outside) is the biggest, and that little stick is still the smallest. lol

028. Asplenium trichomanes (maidenhair spleenwort) Very little still, but seems healthy. I hope for its fronds to spill over my newly constructed garden wall when it’s bigger.

029. Athyrium felix-femina (lady fern) Doing very well, as a fern that can tolerate full sun.

030. Caltha palustris (marsh marigold) It is a marsh plant and there is no pond on the property to plant it, but there is a leaking eavestrough, which I thought would do well enough along with heavy watering. So far I have been correct.

031. Campanula rotundifolia (harebell) Very lush and green. I struggled to keep it alive that first year, but three years later it’s perfect.

032. Cardamine concatenata (cutleaf toothwort) Sometime this summer!

033. Castilleja miniata (paintbrush) Sometime this summer!

034. Ceanothus americanus (New Jersey tea) Not ready to use in tisanes yet, but growing well.

035. Cerastium arvense (field chickweed) The first two years the thing was barely alive, but this year’s it’s moment to shine as it spreads and flowers.

036. Cercis canadensis (redbud) No flowers this spring, but wonderful foliage. Fingers crossed for next year.

037. Comptonia peregrina (sweetfern) Next weekend!

038. Coreopsis lanceolata (lance-leaved tickseed) The first plant I attempted died, but this one’s doing very well.

039. Cornus canadensis (bunchberry) Next weekend! I mean, my plant from last year would likely be fine if the squirrels hadn’t dug it up, as would the one before that (because that one came from the old place and had survived the winter just fine!). So, I’m going to plant the new one in a different spot and hope the fluffy-tailed rodents leave the poor thing alone this time.

040. Cornus florida (flowering dogwood) Just a baby still, but its leaves are nice and green. I had one before it that really liked the hill I had planted it on back at the old place but died in the pot before I could put it in its new home.

041. Cystopteris bulbifera (berry bladder fern) Doing just fine. I love my ferns.

042. Dalea purpurea (purple prairie clover) Hopefully coming by the end of this month!

043. Deschampsia caespitosa (tufted hair grass) Not doing too well. Was fine last year, so I’m not sure what’s going on.

044. Echinacea purpurea (purple coneflower) I’ve always loved these. They’re edible, medicinal (with caution), have lovely flowers, and attract lots of pollinators including bees and butterflies. Mine is doing perfectly. No flowers yet this year, but very green healthy foliage.

046 Erythronium americanum (trout lily/dogtooth violet) Still no flowers this spring, but they did come up, so maybe next year.

047. Eupatorium purpureum (sweet-scented Joe Pye weed/gravel root/purple Joe Pye weed) Soon! Also, do you know how this is eaten? Its root is literally burnt and then you use the ashes to flavour your food. The plant is otherwise poisonous, so how it was found out that it could be used this way conjures up amusing scenarios for me.

048. Fragaria vesca (woodland strawberry/wild strawberry/alpine strawberry) I have strawberries! They’re far from ripe yet, but developing well. They’re also spreading over the hill I planted them on and will hopefully give the garlic mustard and dog-strangling vine a run for their money.

049. Fragaria virginiana (wild strawberry/Virginia strawberry/common strawberry/mountain strawberry) Because one native species of strawberry isn’t enough, I have both. This one is also making strawberries and nicely filling out the area I put it in.

050. Galium boreale (northern bedstraw) Newly planted! The first one of these I planted didn’t survive the winter, but I hadn’t been able to plant it until autumn (because I hadn’t yet been told where I could plant). This one has the rest of spring, the whole summer, and fall until frost to establish itself, and I’ve seen a number of them growing wild at the edge of the ravines, so it should be fine.

051. Gaultheria procumbens (American wintergreen/eastern teaberry/boxberry/checkerberry) Next weekend! I actually already have one and have had it for a couple years, but it’s another that came so root-bound there wasn’t any soil in the pot. I planted it hoping for the best, but it seems to be in a very slow decline. So I’m going to plant another one, hopefully not so root-bound and that will maybe either give it a boost (plants of the same species will often help each other when sick by transferring nutrients) or else take over when the first one dies.

052. Geum aleppicum (yellow avens) I didn’t plant this, and I can’t find it for sale anywhere anyway, but it’s a common plant that shows up as a weed. Being native as well as edible, it’s allowed to stay wherever it isn’t directly in my way.

053. Geum canadense (white avens) Same as above. lol Anyway, both species have attractive foliage. They’re likely not used as garden plants because of how common they are as weeds and because their flower stalks are long and leggy. But I’m happy to have them.

054. Geum rivale (purple avens) Newly planted! This one is offered as a garden plant, though fairly rare, and I’ve finally got my hands on one! All of the Geum species in my garden seem to be doing just fine, so I expect this will fine too. It’s the first plant I’ve put in a new area that doesn’t drain very well which makes it perfect for plants like this one that grow in clay on stream banks.

055. Geum triflorum (prairie smoke) Green leaves. Flower stalks up. This is a pretty reliable plant because it doesn’t die back in the winter, it just sort of sits there waiting for spring and then resumes growth like nothing happened. The first year it drooped a lot but once it established itself there was no stopping it and the transplant went smoothly too.

056. Grindelia squarrosa (gumweed) Hopefully coming by the end of this month!

057. Helianthus divaricatus (woodland sunflower) This is a sunflower that can actually stand a fair bit of shade. I thought mine had died last year due to the foliage and stemming dying back after a squirrel broke it and it and it was still summer. But it’s come up this year and I’m starting to think nothing short of cooking a sunflower’s roots will actually kill it.

058 and 059. Helianthus nuttalli (Nuttall’s sunflower/common tall sunflower) and Helianthus pauciflorus (stiff sunflower/beautiful sunflower) All I know is, I ordered both, I received two small plants, by the time I got them in the ground they were barely alive, that area is now being overtaken by sunflowers, and it could be one species, or it could be both, I don’t know. I did thin out some shoots this spring and add them to a very flavourful pasta sauce. I also thinned out a bunch of their roots last fall. To look at them, you wouldn’t know that either of these had happened, and I’m going to have to thin out more. They’re also putting up shoots between the stones of the cement path. There will be sunflowers here until the end of time.

060. Helianthus tuberosus (sunchoke/Jerusalem artichoke/suntato) Because I don’t learn, I planted yet another sunflower species last year, in a different area, because dammit I want my suntatoes that taste like artichokes. I planted one last year. I took and ate a bunch of tubers in the fall. There are currently five plants. This should be interesting.

061. Heliopsis helianthoides (false sunflower/sweet oxeye) After getting off to a rocky start last year, this one’s doing just fine, and also looks to be living up to its resemblance to sunflowers in more than just appearance.

062. Hibiscus moscheutos (swamp rose mallow) One of them appears to have died so I hope the other isn’t headed the same direction. Seems to be coming up normally though. Also I learned the flowers can change colour from year to year which was a huge surprise to me from the first year to the second. No idea what it will be like this year.

063. Hierochloe odorata (sweet grass/vanilla grass) It flowered last year, which was lovely. I hope it does so again this year. Foliage is nice and green anyhow.

064. Humulus lupulus (common hop) Growing nicely now, though its first several shoots died this year. It seems to just be a very impatient plant in the springtime despite not being very frost hardy. So it put out shoots, which died in the frost, and then put out more, which also died, etc. until finally there was no more frost so it just kept growing. That’s one way to do it, I guess. lol Most other frost-tender plants tend to be more cautious about when they put out new growth.  had a hop plant at my old apartment, which really liked the place I put I put it in, but it died when I potted it to try and take with me.

065. Impatiens capensis (jewelweed/spotted touch-me-not) Hopefully coming by the end of this month!

066. Juglans nigra (black walnut) This tree has likely been on this property since before I was born. I tapped it spring before last. I’ll tap it next spring too. Seems to be a healthy tree.

067. Kalmia latifolia (mountain laurel) They’re not native to Ontario but they are native to eastern North America, in the Appalachian mountains. I figured if they could survive mountain weather they could handle south Ontario winters, and so far it has. It’s not edible but I fell in love with them a long time ago when reading David Attenborough’s The Secret Life of Plants. And they’re making buds this year!

068. Lactuca canadensis (Canadian lettuce) Yes! We have a native lettuce. Most people will pull it up as a weed along with dandelions and thistles, though. I let it stay wherever possible. It’s not like I can just buy a new one, so I count myself lucky when they come up in my garden.

069. Lilium michiganense (Michigan lily) It made smaller ones, but they don’t seem to have survived for whatever reason. The older ones are very robust this year, though, and are budding with what looks like will be many flowers.

070. Lilium philadelphicum (wood lily) Newly planted! I have not had much luck with these, but hopefully this year’s the year. I have two plants, so maybe they’ll help each other.

071. Lindera benzoin (spicebush) No flowers or butterflies yet, but it’s a healthy bush and lives up to its name.

072. Linum lewisii (blue flax) Newly planted! I’ve wanted these for a long time but the places that carried them either wouldn’t deliver or didn’t have them as plugs or potted stock (I find seeds too unreliable). But now I have a couple in the large stone garden pot that I specifically filled with dirt that would allow for good drainage, for those plants that can survive the cold but not sitting in water.

073. Lupinus perennis (sundial lupine) Soon! Or I already have it. Not sure. See, I was sent an email by the company saying I’d probably accidentally gotten a bigleaf lupine instead and they gave me a coupon for the following spring to get a confirmed sundial lupine, but there is a chance I already have it. Either way it’s a nice plant, so whether I have two plants of the same species or two different species is fine.

074. Lupinus polyphyllus (bigleaf lupine/common lupine) I actually haven’t been able to find this species available for delivery anywhere, so if that is what I currently have, then I’m delighted and this is the best plant mixup that could possibly happen (there have been a number). Whatever it is is a very attractive plant even with just the foliage. I hope it makes flowers this year.

075. Mahonia repens (creeping Oregon grape) Speaking of plant mixups! The first time I ordered this I got a Potentilla nepalensis instead. I didn’t know it at the time, as it had a tag saying “Mahonia repens”, but then it flowered...I wouldn’t have minded terribly much if it had been a native Potentilla species, but “nepalensis” is definitely not that. Well, I emailed the company with a photo and they promptly delivered not one, but two creeping Oregon grape plants, and both seem to be doing okay, making new growth, survived the winter, which the potentilla did not.

076. Maianthemum stellatum (starry false Solomon’s seal) They seem to be doing well! They flowered, but I don’t know if there will be berries. Next year maybe, but then you don’t really see Maianthemum berries until late summer, so maybe there will be a couple this year.

077. Mentha arvensis (wild mint) It’s doing exactly what mint does. Tastes wonderful, which is a great reason for thinning it out and pulling it out from between the sidewalk stones.

078. Mertensia paniculata (tall bluebells) Currently flowering. Despite the name, though they do grow taller than their cousin the Virginia bluebells, I wouldn’t say they’re a bigger plant overall. Very nice though. The flowers are a delicate light blue.

079. Mertensia virginica (Virginia bluebells) When I planted the rootstock in the early summer and nothing came up at all, I thought they had died. But nope! They came up vigorously this spring, with huge leaves and incredibly blue flowers. The flowers are don and it’s starting to die back now, but what a gorgeous springtime plant it is.

080. Monarda didyma (scarlet beebalm) My theory is if you put two members of the mint family next to each other, they’ll keep each other at bay. I’m probably wrong. Anyway, this is already spreading in two directions. Last year caterpillars at a lot of its flowers. I hope that won’t happen this year.

081. Monarda fistulosa (wild bergamot) Has become a very big plant, but politely hasn’t really left it’s immediate area. They make great dried flowers after the winter, by the way, as the seedheads retain the scent. Especially if you squeeze them.

082. Monarda punctata (horsemint) This is starting to fill out now, but compared to the other members of its genus took a very long time to go past a teeny tiny little growth. Last year it got huge shortly after I planted it, so we’ll see if it does that this year. I hope so. The bees, wasps, and other pollinators absolutely loved it.

083. Myosotis laxa (smallflower forget-me-not) I didn’t plant it, I can’t even find it available for sale. It just grows as a weed. It’s just as blue as other forget-me-nots, but with stems that are very leggy and even smaller flowers than the popular garden species. But it’s native so it stays where it’s not directly in my way. It’s very prolific, lots of plants in the garden.

084. Myrica gale (sweet gale/bog myrtle) Only just started making new growth. It seems to be on its way out and I’m not sure why, but it makes me sad. I think last year was really hard on it being so hot so early and I didn’t have a hose then, so I was stuck carrying buckets of water up from my apartment in the basement. But I have a hose this year and I’ve been watering regularly, so maybe, just maybe, it will spring back into action this year. It’s such a pretty bush when in full foliage and the leaves taste like green tea.

085. Oenothera fruticosa (narrow-leaved sundrops) Next weekend! I’ve grown another species which has finished its lifecycle (they’re biennial) and sadly doesn’t seem to have successfully reseeded itself. But maybe this one will.

086. Onoclea sensibilis (sensitive fern) This poor thing struggled hard last year. I planted it between a tree and the house, but it still got a lot of sunlight. Still, it came up this year, and in my experience, second year plants tend to be much more hardy, so we’ll see. It’s doing fine for now.

087. Opuntia fragilis (fragile prickly pear) I did put it in a fairly dry area that gets full sun, but it does struggle in the winter and spring. It is starting to bounce back, though, just like it did last year, and the pieces it scattered are making roots of their own. All of whom are spiky bastards.

088. Opuntia humifusa (eastern prickly pear/devil’s tongue) This did just fine. I had it in a big stone pot which I moved to an area that gets no rain or snow on it, and it’s making new growth now that I’ve moved the pot back into the full sun. It like to spike me whenever I move the pot.

089. Osmundastrum cinnamomeum (cinnamon fern) Next weekend!

090. Oxalis stricta (yellow woodsorrel/sourgrass) It’s not technically native to Ontario, but it is native to Michigan and moved up here decades or possibly centuries ago. I didn’t plant it and you can’t find it in stores because it’s considered a weed, but it is coming up in my garden, it doesn’t hurt anything, and it is a delicious little plant, so it stays.

091. Parthenocissus quinquefolia (Virginia creeper) I didn’t have to buy this because it was already in the yard (it’s common in the ravines), but if it wasn’t I would have, because it’s gorgeous and I like the taste of the berries. It’s a native relative of Boston ivy, so if you’re wanting a wall climber, please get Virginia creeper instead. They’re available at a lot of garden centres and online.

092. Phlox divaricata (woodland phlox/blue phlox) It’s growing, but I think one of the white avens is overcrowding it, so I’ll probably dig that one up and eat it so the phlox can have more space.

093. Podophyllum peltatum (mayapple) Three plants in last year. One plant up this year. Oh well. It’s growing nicely, so hopefully it will spread.

094. Polygonatum biflorum (smooth Solomon’s seal) Hopefully coming by the end of this month!

095. Polystichum achrosticoides (Christmas fern) It doesn’t die back in the winter! I mean, the leaves get kind of yellowed, but otherwise just hangs out and makes new growth in spring. My first attempt with ferns (ostrich ferns) was a failure, but so far all my other fern species have been successful and are currently thriving.

096. Prunus americana (American plum) It’s very top heavy when leafed so it flops over whenever it rains which is kind of funny, but it seems to be doing fine.

097. Prunus nigra (black plum/Canada plum) My first black plum died, but this one seems fine.

098. Prunus pumila (sand cherry) Soon! And it better bloody be a sand cherry and not a purple-leaf sandcherry, which is a hybrid, like the last company I ordered one from sent me. But that company didn’t specialize in native plants and carried both plants, whereas this company does specialize in native plants and does not advertise the hybrid at all.

099. Prunus serotina (black cherry) This is the very cherry that is used to flavour black cherry ice cream! But my little tree (not that little anymore lmao) hasn’t made flowers yet. It has nice foliage though it keeps trying to grow into the neighbour’s fence. Don’t know why. The sun doesn’t come from there. Maybe it will flower next spring.

100. Pycnanthemum tenufolium (slender mountain mint) Despite being part of the mint family, this is actually a very polite plant so far that stays in its immediate area.

101. Pycnanthemum virginiana (Virginia mountain mint) Just as polite as its cousin. My first died and I blame the person who lived in another unit who decided that garden bed was an ash tray. I managed to put a stop to that, got all the cigarettes out, dug out a stump, added new dirt, and planted a new Virginia mountain mint as well as bride’s feathers. That particular tenant isn’t there anymore and nobody else does anything with the outside, except to put a garden hyacinth there, which I’ve left in its pot and been watering. I’m not just going to leave the poor thing to die. Anyway, the Virginia mountain mint flowered last year and I hope it does so again this year.

102. Ratibida columnifera (yellow coneflower/upright prairie coneflower) Newly planted! I don’t like to get the cultivar versions if I can avoid it, but I will if that’s all that’s available, or in this case, to get the plants I really wanted, I needed to get something that would put me over the minimum cost. But I didn’t want to leave it at that, so I bought a non-cultivar this year so they can be friends.

103. Ratibida pinnata (gray-headed coneflower/yellow coneflower/pinnate prairie coneflower) This almost flowered last year and the I accidentally broke it with the hose. That will not happen this year. I don’t see a flower stalk yet, but the leaves look healthy.

104. Rhus aromatica (fragrant sumac) It’s putting out flowers, but it did so last year and nothing happened, so I guess we’ll see this year.

105. Rosa blanda (smooth rose) A rose without thorns! Or almost. It’s got leaves out, but it’s a slow grower for a rose and hasn’t flowered yet.

106. Rubus occidentalis (black raspberry) This was supposed to be a red raspberry because black raspberries are easy to find in the ravines, but that’s okay, and I did order a new red raspberry which will hopefully actually be red. lol

107. Rubus strigosus (American red raspberry) Soon! Sometimes considered a variety of Rubus idaeus, which is the one you find in grocery stores. There is one patch I’ve found of them in the ravines, but they’re not nearly as common here as the black raspberry. Hopefully this new plant I get will actually be the red raspberry.

108. Rudbeckia laciniata (cutleaf coneflower/green-headed coneflower) There are two plants with very different leaves growing there. One of them I hope is the plant I intended, but won’t know until they flowers. They’re both doing well, whatever they are.

109. Sambucus canadensis (common elderberry) It’s making flowers this year! I learned the hard way that this species does NOT like being transplanted to a pot, which I had to do to take with me to my current apartment. However, it did eventually bounce back and didn’t mind being transplanted to its current location, which it likes just fine.

110. Shepherdia canadensis (Canada buffaloberry) Next weekend!

111. Solidago canadensis (Canadian goldenrod) I tried to buy this plant but they accidentally sent me an aster species instead. However, there are a bunch of goldenrods growing a different area that I didn’t plant and I believe to be this species.

112. Solidago nemoralis (gray goldenrod) Droops a lot but bounces back quickly.

113. Solidago simplex (spike goldenrod/sticky goldenrod/Mt. Albert Goldenrod) I’ve tried this once before and it died, possibly from being small enough that the ledge it was next to prevented it from getting enough sunlight. I’ve planted the new one far enough from the ledge that it does not get shaded by it, so hopefully that will do the trick.

114. Spiraea alba (meadowsweet) The first year in the new place it struggled a bit, but it’s fine now and it flowered last year.

115. Symphoricarpos orbiculatus (coralberry) Next weekend! It’s also the first time I’ve seen it available anywhere.

116. Symphyotrichum ciliolatum (fringed blue aster/Lindley’s aster/northern heart-leaved aster) A very polite aster, or maybe it’s just being kept under control by the sweet grass (055). Its foliage is that lovely gray-green colour often referred to as “blue” when people talk about holly, spruce, and hosta leaves, and its flowers are that pale blue people often think of as purple or periwinkle but shows up digitally as light blue.

117. Symphyotrichum cordifolium (heart-leaved aster) Doing fine where I planted it.

118. Symphyotrichum laeve (smooth aster) I didn’t have the tag and thought this was a violet when I planted it. It now thinks it owns the space, but looks very nice when it’s in bloom.

119. Symphyotrichum lanceolatum (panicled aster/lance-leaf aster/willow aster/tall white aster/eastern line aster/white-panicle aster/narrow-leaf Michaelmas daisy) Lots of common names. It decided it belonged on the sidewalk last year, but surprisingly agreed when I placed its branches behind the stone line of the garden. We’ll see if we can come to the same agreement this year.

120. Symphyotrichum novae-angliae (New England aster) Not flowering yet this year, but looks it’s getting ready. They’re such a lovely rich violet to purple and I love that they flower so late into autumn too.

121. Taraxacum officinale ceratophorum (fleshy dandelion/horned dandelion/rough dandelion) Obviously didn’t buy it. lol But it is in my garden along with non-native subspecies. Since they don’t harm the plants they grow among, they can stay as long as they’re not in my way.

122. Trillium erectum (red trillium) Next weekend! And I possibly already have one. See, I ordered three trillium species last year as bulbs and planted them, but lost two of the tags. Only two species came up and only the one with the tag flowered this year. So I don’t know if the one that didn’t flower was erectum or grandifolium, so I ordered both again.

123. Trillium flexipes (nodding trillium) It came up this year and it was lovely. Died back now though.

124. Trillium grandiflorum (great white trillium) Next weekend! And I might already have one: see 109. Ontario’s provincial flower. I once made a set of coat of arms style designs with each of the provincial flowers and animals.

125. Urtica dioica gracilis (stinging nettle) Planted itself in my garden back at the old place and if I didn’t trust the other plants would be safe after I left (I was right, by the way; the whole backyard has been turned over) I definitely didn’t think this would be either, so I potted it to take with and got stung for my trouble, but it’s happy in its new home. Lives up to its name, of course, but I did eat a few of the tops earlier this year in soup and later in pasta sauce, so I suppose we’re even.

126. Vaccinium angustifolium (lowbush blueberry/wild blueberry) When you see “wild blueberries” in the grocery store in Ontario, it’s this. It always seems to struggle with mould in the spring. Every year I’ve had it. I got it a friend in hopes it would help, but they seem to both be dealing with it now. I’ll have cut back the bad branches and hope that helps. It usually does, but I don’t know why it starts in the first place. None of the neighbouring plants are suffering.

127. Vaccinium corymbosom (highbush blueberry) This is the species you’ll most often see in the grocery store in Ontario as “blueberries”. My bush always makes some flowers and berries, but it’s not doing great right now. Not sure why. It doesn’t get mould the way the lowbush blueberries do. I hope it’s not on its way out. You can get them at a lot of garden centres, but there’s usually a minimum amount of plants or a minimum cost, and garden centres that specialize in native plants don’t often carry these, while garden centres that don’t often don’t have any other native species or at least not any I need or have room for. So for my purposes they’re kind of hard to get.

128. Verbena hastata (blue vervain) Was off to a slow start this year, but it’s doing just fine now.

129. Viburnum acerifolium (mapleleaf viburnum) Next weekend!

130. Viburnum lentago (nannyberry) It’s doing fine, just fine, but I doubt I’ll get any berries for some time yet.

131. Viburnum nudum cassinoides (Witherod viburnum) A lovely little bush so far. Maybe I’ll get flowers next spring.

132. Viola adunca (hookedspur violet/western dog violet/early blue violet) Hopefully coming by the end of this month! My first go with this plant was not successful. Hopefully better luck this time.

133. Viola blanda (sweet white violet) Exactly what it says on the tin. There’s a delicate pink to the centre, and the foliage is nice too.

134. Viola canadensis (Canada violet) It’s tall for a violet, and spreading nicely with lots of flowers.

135. Viola labradorica (purple Labrador violet) Next weekend! Despite it’s name, it is also native to Ontario.

136. Viola sororia (wood violet/blue violet) This is most common violet you see generally, which makes it hard, though not impossible, to find in garden centres. However, they’ve planted themselves in the yard and I’ve successfully transferred one to one of the beds. I have other place I want to put the rest before I dig up that area.

137. Vitis riparia (riverbank grape) I have two plants because I didn’t realize when I bought it that hiding among the weeds in another part of the garden there already was one. Oh well. Guaranteed cross-pollination of two genetically diverse individuals. They’re both doing well.

138. Zizia aurea (golden alexanders) They’re doing well. It looks a lot like wild parsnip, which it is related to, but it’s much more friendly, and I ate some this spring.

I may be able to order more. We’ll see. One of my go-to places says they won’t ship until “opening day”. I guess they mean when their area reopens, but that might not be till next year. Meantime, I will continue to construct my garden wall in the back.

[littlefeather-wolf]

Hau Mitakuyapi, Wana Hihanni /Anpetu lila Was’te! Greetings Relatives, now it is a very good morning/ day.

A LOT OF TEXT HERE PLEASE READ

Elder's Meditation of the Day; "...the spirit still has something for us to discover - an herb, a sprig, a flower - a very small flower, maybe you can spend a long time in its contemplation, thinking about it.” Lame Deer, LAKOTA

The world today is about hurry up! Get there faster! Work harder, produce more, hurry up, eat quickly, be on time, don't get stressed- headaches, conflict, drink to calm down, go to training on stress management, time management -

STOP !

Go spend 5 minutes with a flower or a plant.

Look at it - think about it - look at its beauty, smell it, close your eyes and smell it again. Touch it; touch with your eyes closed. Listen to it; listen to it with your eyed closed. Slow your mind down. Think about the little things. Now close your eyes and pray. Great Spirit, this feeling of calmness that I have, let me have it all day long ...

The meditations are copyright of Coyhis Publishing TRIBAL WHISPERS;

There is a wonderful, calming and gentleness about sitting by an outdoor fire with friends or family. Stories are told, personal tales are shared and family lore is proudly recounted. Sitting by the flames you feel the warmth from the burning wood. The orange glow is soothing and sharing of yourself becomes very easy. Hopefully soon we will be setting up our backyard or camp site campfire to enjoy with those we cherish. (Art by Diane Montreuil) COTTONY MOON CHILD STEPHENSON; hen Bee comes to you as a Spirit Animal Guide, it’s time to take inventory regarding your responsibilities. Are you over-extended, or have you perhaps become languid and apathetic? Bee won’t tolerate either extreme .., Bee Spirit Animal has powerful messages about your need to balance work, play, devotion, service and socialization ... Though Bees can carry 300 times their weight and never shirk their duty to community contributions, they also “stop and smell the roses” every day.Those born with a Bee Totem have a real sense for managing personal energy. Your Totem gives you clarity about your path in life. Work is not a problem for you, nor is play ... The Bee’s soul-song mirrors Ecclesiastics 3: “To everything, there is a season and a time to every purpose under Heaven.” To those with Bee Totems Tend toward autonomy when it comes to personal needs but are very socially focused otherwise. When they see a need, there is no question of helping, particularly if it brings joy and promotes love.Bee as a Power Animal appears in a variety of Shamanic traditions ... As an emblem of abundance, persistence, industry, communication, teamwork, and fruitfulness, call on Bee when you need these energies in your life, or when you wish to send a message to the Divine (particularly needs concentrating on work and community) ... The spiritual meaning of Bees is also connected to this animal’s role in pollination. All that we need to survive is helped along by the Bee and without Bee’s efforts we would not survive ... Therefore, we have a special responsibility to protect Bees. Their survival is intricately tied into our own. Bee spiritual meaning then also relates back to the interconnectivity of all life ... Bee Spirit is very helpful when you’re working with solar magic, particularly sun Goddesses. She also supports success when it feels like you’ve reached a standstill in a project or goal ... If you need support for fertility issues, let Bee energy into your reality. It’s amazing what anxieties can dissipate when the warmth of Bee’s sunny spirit shines on your heart!Bee spiritual meaning is associated with tenacity and also with the importance of respecting the natural world. The association between the Bee’s sting and your ability to defend yourself is part of Bee meaning as well. Are you fierce regardless of your size ? Do you have the ability to defend yourself ? You may be asked to call on this ability when working with Bee ... Some tribes associate Bees and their ability to produce honey with fertility and abundance as well ...

[kurohiraeth]

According to all known laws of aviation, there is no way a bee should be able to fly.  Its wings are too small to get its fat little body off the ground.  The bee, of course, flies anyway because bees don’t care what humans think is impossible.  Yellow, black. Yellow, black.  Yellow, black. Yellow, black. Ooh, black and yellow! Let’s shake it up a little. Barry! Breakfast is ready! Coming! Hang on a second. Hello? Barry? Adam? Can you believe this is happening? I can’t. I’ll pick you up. Looking sharp. Use the stairs. Your father paid good money for those. Sorry. I’m excited. Here’s the graduate. We’re very proud of you, son. A perfect report card, all B’s. Very proud. Ma! I got a thing going here. You got lint on your fuzz. Ow! That’s me! Wave to us! We’ll be in row 118,000. Bye! Barry, I told you, stop flying in the house! Hey, Adam. Hey, Barry. Is that fuzz gel? A little. Special day, graduation. Never thought I’d make it. Three days grade school, three days high school. Those were awkward. Three days college. I’m glad I took a day and hitchhiked around the hive. You did come back different. Hi, Barry. Artie, growing a moustache? Looks good. Hear about Frankie? Yeah. You going to the funeral? No, I’m not going. Everybody knows, sting someone, you die. Don’t waste it on a squirrel. Such a hothead. I guess he could have just gotten out of the way. I love this incorporating an amusement park into our day. That’s why we don’t need vacations. Boy, quite a bit of pomp…under the circumstances. Well, Adam, today we are men. We are! Bee-men. Amen! Hallelujah! Students, faculty, distinguished bees, please welcome Dean Buzzwell. Welcome, New Hive City graduating class of……9:15. That concludes our ceremonies. And begins your career at Honex Industries! Will we pick our job today? I heard it’s just orientation. Heads up! Here we go. Keep your hands and antennas inside the tram at all times. Wonder what it’ll be like? A little scary. Welcome to Honex, a division of Honesco and a part of the Hexagon Group. This is it! Wow. Wow. We know that you, as a bee, have worked your whole life to get to the point where you can work for your whole life. Honey begins when our valiant Pollen Jocks bring the nectar to the hive. Our top-secret formula is automatically color-corrected, scent-adjusted and bubble-contoured into this soothing sweet syrup with its distinctive golden glow you know as… Honey! That girl was hot. She’s my cousin! She is? Yes, we’re all cousins. Right. You’re right. At Honex, we constantly strive to improve every aspect of bee existence. These bees are stress-testing a new helmet technology. What do you think he makes? Not enough. Here we have our latest advancement, the Krelman. What does that do? Catches that little strand of honey that hangs after you pour it. Saves us millions. Can anyone work on the Krelman? Of course. Most bee jobs are small ones. But bees know that every small job, if it’s done well, means a lot. But choose carefully because you’ll stay in the job you pick for the rest of your life. The same job the rest of your life? I didn’t know that. What’s the difference? You’ll be happy to know that bees, as a species, haven’t had one day off in 27 million years. So you’ll just work us to death? We’ll sure try. Wow! That blew my mind! “What’s the difference?” How can you say that? One job forever? That’s an insane choice to have to make. I’m relieved. Now we only have to make one decision in life. But, Adam, how could they never have told us that? Why would you question anything? We’re bees. We’re the most perfectly functioning society on Earth. You ever think maybe things work a little too well here? Like what? Give me one example. I don’t know. But you know what I’m talking about. Please clear the gate. Royal Nectar Force on approach. Wait a second. Check it out. Hey, those are Pollen Jocks! Wow. I’ve never seen them this close. They know what it’s like outside the hive. Yeah, but some don’t come back. Hey, Jocks! Hi, Jocks! You guys did great! You’re monsters! You’re sky freaks! I love it! I love it! I

wonder where they were. I don’t know. Their day’s not planned. Outside the hive, flying who knows where, doing who knows what. You can’t just decide to be a Pollen Jock. You have to be bred for that. Right. Look. That’s more pollen than you and I will see in a lifetime. It’s just a status symbol. Bees make too much of it. Perhaps. Unless you’re wearing it and the ladies see you wearing it. Those ladies? Aren’t they our cousins too? Distant. Distant. Look at these two. Couple of Hive Harrys. Let’s have fun with them. It must be dangerous being a Pollen Jock. Yeah. Once a bear pinned me against a mushroom! He had a paw on my throat, and with the other, he was slapping me! Oh, my! I never thought I’d knock him out. What were you doing during this? Trying to alert the authorities. I can autograph that. A little gusty out there today, wasn’t it, comrades? Yeah. Gusty. We’re hitting a sunflower patch six miles from here tomorrow. Six miles, huh? Barry! A puddle jump for us, but maybe you’re not up for it. Maybe I am. You are not! We’re going 0900 at J-Gate. What do you think, buzzy-boy? Are you bee enough? I might be. It all depends on what 0900 means. Hey, Honex! Dad, you surprised me. You decide what you’re interested in? Well, there’s a lot of choices. But you only get one. Do you ever get bored doing the same job every day? Son, let me tell you about stirring. You grab that stick, and you just move it around, and you stir it around. You get yourself into a rhythm. It’s a beautiful thing. You know, Dad, the more I think about it, maybe the honey field just isn’t right for me. You were thinking of what, making balloon animals? That’s a bad job for a guy with a stinger. Janet, your son’s not sure he wants to go into honey! Barry, you are so funny sometimes. I’m not trying to be funny. You’re not funny! You’re going into honey. Our son, the stirrer! You’re gonna be a stirrer? No one’s listening to me! Wait till you see the sticks I have. I could say anything right now. I’m gonna get an ant tattoo! Let’s open some honey and celebrate! Maybe I’ll pierce my thorax. Shave my antennae. Shack up with a grasshopper. Get a gold tooth and call everybody “dawg”! I’m so proud. We’re starting work today! Today’s the day. Come on! All the good jobs will be gone. Yeah, right. Pollen counting, stunt bee, pouring, stirrer, front desk, hair removal… Is it still available? Hang on. Two left! One of them’s yours! Congratulations! Step to the side. What’d you get? Picking crud out. Stellar! Wow! Couple of newbies? Yes, sir! Our first day! We are ready! Make your choice. You want to go first? No, you go. Oh, my. What’s available? Restroom attendant’s open, not for the reason you think. Any chance of getting the Krelman? Sure, you’re on. I’m sorry, the Krelman just closed out. Wax monkey’s always open. The Krelman opened up again. What happened? A bee died. Makes an opening. See? He’s dead. Another dead one. Deady. Deadified. Two more dead. Dead from the neck up. Dead from the neck down. That’s life! Oh, this is so hard! Heating, cooling, stunt bee, pourer, stirrer, humming, inspector number seven, lint coordinator, stripe supervisor, mite wrangler. Barry, what do you think I should… Barry? Barry! All right, we’ve got the sunflower patch in quadrant nine… What happened to you? Where are you? I’m going out. Out? Out where? Out there. Oh, no! I have to, before I go to work for the rest of my life. You’re gonna die! You’re crazy! Hello? Another call coming in. If anyone’s feeling brave, there’s a Korean deli on 83rd that gets their roses today. Hey, guys. Look at that. Isn’t that the kid we saw yesterday? Hold it, son, flight deck’s restricted. It’s OK, Lou. We’re gonna take him up. Really? Feeling lucky, are you? Sign here, here. Just initial that. Thank you. OK. You got a rain advisory today, and as you all know, bees cannot fly in rain. So be careful. As always, watch your brooms, hockey sticks, dogs, birds, bears and bats. Also, I got a couple of reports of root beer being poured on us. Murphy’s in a home because of it, babbling like a cicada!

That’s awful. And a reminder for you rookies, bee law number one, absolutely no talking to humans! All right, launch positions! Buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz! Buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz! Buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz! Black and yellow! Hello! You ready for this, hot shot? Yeah. Yeah, bring it on. Wind, check. Antennae, check. Nectar pack, check. Wings, check. Stinger, check. Scared out of my shorts, check. OK, ladies, let’s move it out! Pound those petunias, you striped stem-suckers! All of you, drain those flowers! Wow! I’m out! I can’t believe I’m out! So blue. I feel so fast and free! Box kite! Wow! Flowers! This is Blue Leader. We have roses visual. Bring it around 30 degrees and hold. Roses! 30 degrees, roger. Bringing it around. Stand to the side, kid. It’s got a bit of a kick. That is one nectar collector! Ever see pollination up close? No, sir. I pick up some pollen here, sprinkle it over here. Maybe a dash over there, a pinch on that one. See that? It’s a little bit of magic. That’s amazing. Why do we do that? That’s pollen power. More pollen, more flowers, more nectar, more honey for us. Cool. I’m picking up a lot of bright yellow. Could be daisies. Don’t we need those? Copy that visual. Wait. One of these flowers seems to be on the move. Say again? You’re reporting a moving flower? Affirmative. That was on the line! This is the coolest. What is it? I don’t know, but I’m loving this color. It smells good. Not like a flower, but I like it. Yeah, fuzzy. Chemical-y. Careful, guys. It’s a little grabby. My sweet lord of bees! Candy-brain, get off there! Problem! Guys! This could be bad. Affirmative. Very close. Gonna hurt. Mama’s little boy. You are way out of position, rookie! Coming in at you like a missile! Help me! I don’t think these are flowers. Should we tell him? I think he knows. What is this?! Match point! You can start packing up, honey, because you’re about to eat it! Yowser! Gross. There’s a bee in the car! Do something! I’m driving! Hi, bee. He’s back here! He’s going to sting me! Nobody move. If you don’t move, he won’t sting you. Freeze! He blinked! Spray him, Granny! What are you doing?! Wow… the tension level out here is unbelievable. I gotta get home. Can’t fly in rain. Can’t fly in rain. Can’t fly in rain. Mayday! Mayday! Bee going down! Ken, could you close the window please? Check out my new resume. I made it into a fold-out brochure. You see? Folds out. Oh, no. More humans. I don’t need this. What was that? Maybe this time. This time. This time. This time! This time! This… Drapes! That is diabolical. It’s fantastic. It’s got all my special skills, even my top-ten favorite movies. What’s number one? Star Wars? Nah, I don’t go for that……kind of stuff. No wonder we shouldn’t talk to them. They’re out of their minds.   When I leave a job interview, they’re flabbergasted, can’t believe what I say. There’s the sun. Maybe that’s a way out. I don’t remember the sun having a big 75 on it. I predicted global warming. I could feel it getting hotter. At first I thought it was just me. Wait! Stop! Bee! Stand back. These are winter boots. Wait! Don’t kill him! You know I’m allergic to them! This thing could kill me! Why does his life have less value than yours? Why does his life have any less value than mine? Is that your statement? I’m just saying all life has value. You don’t know what he’s capable of feeling. My brochure! There you go, little guy. I’m not scared of him. It’s an allergic thing. Put that on your resume brochure. My whole face could puff up. Make it one of your special skills. Knocking someone out is also a special skill. Right. Bye, Vanessa. Thanks. Vanessa, next week? Yogurt night? Sure, Ken. You know, whatever. You could put carob chips on there. Bye. Supposed to be less calories. Bye. I gotta say something. She saved my life. I gotta say something. All right, here it goes. Nah. What would I say? I could really get in trouble. It’s a bee law. You’re not supposed to talk to a human. I can’t believe I’m doing this. I’ve got to. Oh, I can’t do it. Come on! No. Yes. No. Do it. I can’t. How should I start

it? “You like jazz?” No, that’s no good. Here she comes! Speak, you fool! Hi! I’m sorry. You’re talking. Yes, I know. You’re talking! I’m so sorry. No, it’s OK. It’s fine. I know I’m dreaming. But I don’t recall going to bed. Well, I’m sure this is very disconcerting. This is a bit of a surprise to me. I mean, you’re a bee! I am. And I’m not supposed to be doing this, but they were all trying to kill me. And if it wasn’t for you… I had to thank you. It’s just how I was raised. That was a little weird. I’m talking with a bee. Yeah. I’m talking to a bee. And the bee is talking to me! I just want to say I’m grateful. I’ll leave now. Wait! How did you learn to do that? What? The talking thing. Same way you did, I guess. “Mama, Dada, honey.” You pick it up. That’s very funny. Yeah. Bees are funny. If we didn’t laugh, we’d cry with what we have to deal with. Anyway… Can I……get you something? Like what? I don’t know. I mean… I don’t know. Coffee? I don’t want to put you out. It’s no trouble. It takes two minutes. It’s just coffee. I hate to impose. Don’t be ridiculous! Actually, I would love a cup. Hey, you want rum cake? I shouldn’t. Have some. No, I can’t. Come on! I’m trying to lose a couple micrograms. Where? These stripes don’t help. You look great! I don’t know if you know anything about fashion. Are you all right? No. He’s making the tie in the cab as they’re flying up Madison. He finally gets there. He runs up the steps into the church. The wedding is on. And he says, “Watermelon? I thought you said Guatemalan. Why would I marry a watermelon?” Is that a bee joke? That’s the kind of stuff we do. Yeah, different. So, what are you gonna do, Barry? About work? I don’t know. I want to do my part for the hive, but I can’t do it the way they want. I know how you feel. You do? Sure. My parents wanted me to be a lawyer or a doctor, but I wanted to be a florist. Really? My only interest is flowers. Our new queen was just elected with that same campaign slogan. Anyway, if you look… There’s my hive right there. See it? You’re in Sheep Meadow! Yes! I’m right off the Turtle Pond! No way! I know that area. I lost a toe ring there once. Why do girls put rings on their toes? Why not? It’s like putting a hat on your knee. Maybe I’ll try that. You all right, ma'am? Oh, yeah. Fine. Just having two cups of coffee! Anyway, this has been great. Thanks for the coffee. Yeah, it’s no trouble. Sorry I couldn’t finish it. If I did, I’d be up the rest of my life. Are you…? Can I take a piece of this with me? Sure! Here, have a crumb. Thanks! Yeah. All right. Well, then… I guess I’ll see you around. Or not. OK, Barry. And thank you so much again… for before. Oh, that? That was nothing. Well, not nothing, but… Anyway… This can’t possibly work. He’s all set to go. We may as well try it. OK, Dave, pull the chute. Sounds amazing. It was amazing! It was the scariest, happiest moment of my life. Humans! I can’t believe you were with humans! Giant, scary humans! What were they like? Huge and crazy. They talk crazy. They eat crazy giant things. They drive crazy. Do they try and kill you, like on TV? Some of them. But some of them don’t. How’d you get back? Poodle. You did it, and I’m glad. You saw whatever you wanted to see. You had your “experience.” Now you can pick out your job and be normal. Well… Well? Well, I met someone. You did? Was she Bee-ish? A wasp?! Your parents will kill you! No, no, no, not a wasp. Spider? I’m not attracted to spiders. I know it’s the hottest thing, with the eight legs and all. I can’t get by that face. So who is she? She's… human. No, no. That’s a bee law. You wouldn’t break a bee law. Her name’s Vanessa. Oh, boy. She’s so nice. And she’s a florist! Oh, no! You’re dating a human florist! We’re not dating. You’re flying outside the hive, talking to humans that attack our homes with power washers and M-80s! One-eighth a stick of dynamite! She saved my life! And she understands me. This is over! Eat this. This is not over! What was that? They call it a crumb. It was so stingin’ stripey! And that’s not what they eat. That’s

what falls off what they eat! You know what a Cinnabon is? No. It’s bread and cinnamon and frosting. They heat it up… Sit down!…really hot! Listen to me! We are not them! We’re us. There’s us and there’s them! Yes, but who can deny the heart that is yearning? There’s no yearning. Stop yearning. Listen to me! You have got to start thinking bee, my friend. Thinking bee! Thinking bee. Thinking bee. Thinking bee! Thinking bee! Thinking bee! Thinking bee! There he is. He’s in the pool. You know what your problem is, Barry? I gotta start thinking bee? How much longer will this go on? It’s been three days! Why aren’t you working? I’ve got a lot of big life decisions to think about. What life? You have no life! You have no job. You’re barely a bee! Would it kill you to make a little honey? Barry, come out. Your father’s talking to you. Martin, would you talk to him? Barry, I’m talking to you! You coming? Got everything? All set! Go ahead. I’ll catch up. Don’t be too long. Watch this! Vanessa! We’re still here. I told you not to yell at him. He doesn’t respond to yelling! Then why yell at me? Because you don’t listen! I’m not listening to this. Sorry, I’ve gotta go. Where are you going? I’m meeting a friend. A girl? Is this why you can’t decide? Bye. I just hope she’s Bee-ish. They have a huge parade of flowers every year in Pasadena? To be in the Tournament of Roses, that’s every florist’s dream! Up on a float, surrounded by flowers, crowds cheering. A tournament. Do the roses compete in athletic events? No. All right, I’ve got one. How come you don’t fly everywhere? It’s exhausting. Why don’t you run everywhere? It’s faster. Yeah, OK, I see, I see. All right, your turn. TiVo. You can just freeze live TV? That’s insane! You don’t have that? We have Hivo, but it’s a disease. It’s a horrible, horrible disease. Oh, my. Dumb bees! You must want to sting all those jerks. We try not to sting. It’s usually fatal for us. So you have to watch your temper. Very carefully. You kick a wall, take a walk, write an angry letter and throw it out. Work through it like any emotion: Anger, jealousy, lust. Oh, my goodness! Are you OK? Yeah. What is wrong with you?! It’s a bug. He’s not bothering anybody. Get out of here, you creep! What was that? A Pic ‘N’ Save circular? Yeah, it was. How did you know? It felt like about 10 pages. Seventy-five is pretty much our limit.  You’ve really got that down to a science. I lost a cousin to Italian Vogue. I’ll bet. What in the name of Mighty Hercules is this? How did this get here? Cute Bee, Golden Blossom, Ray Liotta Private Select? Is he that actor? I never heard of him. Why is this here? For people. We eat it. You don’t have enough food of your own? Well, yes. How do you get it? Bees make it. I know who makes it! And it’s hard to make it! There’s heating, cooling, stirring. You need a whole Krelman thing! It’s organic. It’s our-ganic! It’s just honey, Barry. Just what?! Bees don’t know about this! This is stealing! A lot of stealing! You’ve taken our homes, schools, hospitals! This is all we have! And it’s on sale?! I’m getting to the bottom of this. I’m getting to the bottom of all of this! Hey, Hector. You almost done? Almost. He is here. I sense it. Well, I guess I’ll go home now and just leave this nice honey out, with no one around. You’re busted, box boy! I knew I heard something. So you can talk! I can talk. And now you’ll start talking! Where you getting the sweet stuff? Who’s your supplier? I don’t understand. I thought we were friends. The last thing we want to do is upset bees! You’re too late! It’s ours now! You, sir, have crossed the wrong sword! You, sir, will be lunch for my iguana, Ignacio! Where is the honey coming from? Tell me where! Honey Farms! It comes from Honey Farms! Crazy person! What horrible thing has happened here? These faces, they never knew what hit them. And now they’re on the road to nowhere! Just keep still. What? You’re not dead? Do I look dead? They will wipe anything that moves. Where you headed? To Honey Farms. I am onto something huge here. I’m going to Alaska.

Moose blood, crazy stuff. Blows your head off! I’m going to Tacoma. And you? He really is dead. All right. Uh-oh! What is that?! Oh, no! A wiper! Triple blade! Triple blade? Jump on! It’s your only chance, bee! Why does everything have to be so doggone clean?! How much do you people need to see?! Open your eyes! Stick your head out the window! From NPR News in Washington, I’m Carl Kasell. But don’t kill no more bugs! Bee! Moose blood guy!! You hear something? Like what? Like tiny screaming. Turn off the radio. Whassup, bee boy? Hey, Blood. Just a row of honey jars, as far as the eye could see. Wow! I assume wherever this truck goes is where they’re getting it. I mean, that honey’s ours. Bees hang tight. We’re all jammed in. It’s a close community. Not us, man. We on our own. Every mosquito on his own. What if you get in trouble? You a mosquito, you in trouble. Nobody likes us. They just smack. See a mosquito, smack, smack! At least you’re out in the world. You must meet girls. Mosquito girls try to trade up, get with a moth, dragonfly. Mosquito girl don’t want no mosquito. You got to be kidding me! Mooseblood’s about to leave the building! So long, bee! Hey, guys! Mooseblood! I knew I’d catch y'all down here. Did you bring your crazy straw? We throw it in jars, slap a label on it, and it’s pretty much pure profit. What is this place? A bee’s got a brain the size of a pinhead. They are pinheads! Pinhead. Check out the new smoker. Oh, sweet. That’s the one you want. The Thomas 3000! Smoker? Ninety puffs a minute, semi-automatic. Twice the nicotine, all the tar. A couple breaths of this knocks them right out. They make the honey, and we make the money. “They make the honey, and we make the money”? Oh, my! What’s going on? Are you OK? Yeah. It doesn’t last too long. Do you know you’re in a fake hive with fake walls? Our queen was moved here. We had no choice. This is your queen? That’s a man in women’s clothes! That’s a drag queen! What is this? Oh, no! There’s hundreds of them! Bee honey. Our honey is being brazenly stolen on a massive scale! This is worse than anything bears have done! I intend to do something. Oh, Barry, stop. Who told you humans are taking our honey? That’s a rumor. Do these look like rumors? That’s a conspiracy theory. These are obviously doctored photos. How did you get mixed up in this? He’s been talking to humans. What? Talking to humans?! He has a human girlfriend. And they make out! Make out? Barry! We do not. You wish you could. Whose side are you on? The bees! I dated a cricket once in San Antonio. Those crazy legs kept me up all night. Barry, this is what you want to do with your life? I want to do it for all our lives. Nobody works harder than bees! Dad, I remember you coming home so overworked your hands were still stirring. You couldn’t stop. I remember that. What right do they have to our honey? We live on two cups a year. They put it in lip balm for no reason whatsoever! Even if it’s true, what can one bee do? Sting them where it really hurts. In the face! The eye! That would hurt. No. Up the nose? That’s a killer. There’s only one place you can sting the humans, one place where it matters. Hive at Five, the hive’s only full-hour action news source. No more bee beards! With Bob Bumble at the anchor desk. Weather with Storm Stinger. Sports with Buzz Larvi. And Jeanette Chung. Good evening. I’m Bob Bumble. And I’m Jeanette Chung. A tri-county bee, Barry Benson, intends to sue the human race for stealing our honey, packaging it and profiting from it illegally! Tomorrow night on Bee Larry King, we’ll have three former queens here in our studio, discussing their new book, Classy Ladies, out this week on Hexagon. Tonight we’re talking to Barry Benson. Did you ever think, “I’m a kid from the hive. I can’t do this”? Bees have never been afraid to change the world. What about Bee Columbus? Bee Gandhi? Bejesus? Where I’m from, we’d never sue humans. We were thinking of stickball or candy stores. How old are you? The bee community is supporting you in this case, which will be the trial of the bee

century. You know, they have a Larry King in the human world too. It’s a common name. Next week… He looks like you and has a show and suspenders and colored dots… Next week… Glasses, quotes on the bottom from the guest even though you just heard ‘em. Bear Week next week! They’re scary, hairy and here live. Always leans forward, pointy shoulders, squinty eyes, very Jewish. In tennis, you attack at the point of weakness! It was my grandmother, Ken. She’s 81. Honey, her backhand’s a joke! I’m not gonna take advantage of that? Quiet, please. Actual work going on here. Is that that same bee? Yes, it is! I’m helping him sue the human race. Hello. Hello, bee. This is Ken. Yeah, I remember you. Timberland, size ten and a half. Vibram sole, I believe. Why does he talk again? Listen, you better go ‘cause we’re really busy working. But it’s our yogurt night! Bye-bye. Why is yogurt night so difficult? You poor thing. You two have been at this for hours! Yes, and Adam here has been a huge help. Frosting… How many sugars? Just one. I try not to use the competition. So why are you helping me? Bees have good qualities. And it takes my mind off the shop. Instead of flowers, people are giving balloon bouquets now. Those are great, if you’re three. And artificial flowers. Oh, those just get me psychotic! Yeah, me too. Bent stingers, pointless pollination. Bees must hate those fake things! Nothing worse than a daffodil that’s had work done. Maybe this could make up for it a little bit. This lawsuit’s a pretty big deal. I guess. You sure you want to go through with it? Am I sure? When I’m done with the humans, they won’t be able to say, “Honey, I’m home,” without paying a royalty! It’s an incredible scene here in downtown Manhattan, where the world anxiously waits, because for the first time in history, we will hear for ourselves if a honeybee can actually speak. What have we gotten into here, Barry? It’s pretty big, isn’t it? I can’t believe how many humans don’t work during the day. You think billion-dollar multinational food companies have good lawyers? Everybody needs to stay behind the barricade. What’s the matter? I don’t know, I just got a chill. Well, if it isn’t the bee team. You boys work on this? All rise! The Honorable Judge Bumbleton presiding. All right. Case number 4475, Superior Court of New York, Barry Bee Benson v. the Honey Industry is now in session. Mr. Montgomery, you’re representing the five food companies collectively? A privilege. Mr. Benson… you’re representing all the bees of the world? I’m kidding. Yes, Your Honor, we’re ready to proceed. Mr. Montgomery, your opening statement, please. Ladies and gentlemen of the jury, my grandmother was a simple woman. Born on a farm, she believed it was man’s divine right to benefit from the bounty of nature God put before us. If we lived in the topsy-turvy world Mr. Benson imagines, just think of what would it mean. I would have to negotiate with the silkworm for the elastic in my britches! Talking bee! How do we know this isn’t some sort of holographic motion-picture-capture Hollywood wizardry? They could be using laser beams! Robotics! Ventriloquism! Cloning! For all we know, he could be on steroids! Mr. Benson? Ladies and gentlemen, there’s no trickery here. I’m just an ordinary bee. Honey’s pretty important to me. It’s important to all bees. We invented it! We make it. And we protect it with our lives. Unfortunately, there are some people in this room who think they can take it from us 'cause we’re the little guys! I’m hoping that, after this is all over, you’ll see how, by taking our honey, you not only take everything we have but everything we are! I wish he’d dress like that all the time. So nice! Call your first witness. So, Mr. Klauss Vanderhayden of Honey Farms, big company you have. I suppose so. I see you also own Honeyburton and Honron! Yes, they provide beekeepers for our farms. Beekeeper. I find that to be a very disturbing term. I don’t imagine you employ any bee-free-ers, do you? No. I couldn’t hear you. No. No. Because you don’t free bees. You keep bees. Not

only that, it seems you thought a bear would be an appropriate image for a jar of honey. They’re very lovable creatures. Yogi Bear, Fozzie Bear, Build-A-Bear. You mean like this? Bears kill bees! How’d you like his head crashing through your living room?! Biting into your couch! Spitting out your throw pillows! OK, that’s enough. Take him away. So, Mr. Sting, thank you for being here. Your name intrigues me. Where have I heard it before? I was with a band called The Police. But you’ve never been a police officer, have you? No, I haven’t. No, you haven’t. And so here we have yet another example of bee culture casually stolen by a human for nothing more than a prance-about stage name. Oh, please. Have you ever been stung, Mr. Sting? Because I’m feeling a little stung, Sting. Or should I say… Mr. Gordon M. Sumner! That’s not his real name?! You idiots! Mr. Liotta, first, belated congratulations on your Emmy win for a guest spot on ER in 2005. Thank you. Thank you. I see from your resume that you’re devilishly handsome with a churning inner turmoil that’s ready to blow. I enjoy what I do. Is that a crime? Not yet it isn’t. But is this what it’s come to for you? Exploiting tiny, helpless bees so you don’t have to rehearse your part and learn your lines, sir? Watch it, Benson! I could blow right now! This isn’t a goodfella. This is a badfella! Why doesn’t someone just step on this creep, and we can all go home?! Order in this court! You’re all thinking it! Order! Order, I say! Say it! Mr. Liotta, please sit down! I think it was awfully nice of that bear to pitch in like that. I think the jury’s on our side. Are we doing everything right, legally? I’m a florist. Right. Well, here’s to a great team. To a great team! Well, hello. Ken! Hello. I didn’t think you were coming. No, I was just late. I tried to call, but… the battery. I didn’t want all this to go to waste, so I called Barry. Luckily, he was free. Oh, that was lucky. There’s a little left. I could heat it up. Yeah, heat it up, sure, whatever. So I hear you’re quite a tennis player. I’m not much for the game myself. The ball’s a little grabby. That’s where I usually sit. Right… there. Ken, Barry was looking at your resume, and he agreed with me that eating with chopsticks isn’t really a special skill. You think I don’t see what you’re doing? I know how hard it is to find the right job. We have that in common. Do we? Bees have 100 percent employment, but we do jobs like taking the crud out. That’s just what I was thinking about doing. Ken, I let Barry borrow your razor for his fuzz. I hope that was all right. I’m going to drain the old stinger. Yeah, you do that. Look at that. You know, I’ve just about had it with your little mind games. What’s that? Italian Vogue. Mamma mia, that’s a lot of pages. A lot of ads. Remember what Van said, why is your life more valuable than mine? Funny, I just can’t seem to recall that! I think something stinks in here! I love the smell of flowers. How do you like the smell of flames?! Not as much. Water bug! Not taking sides! Ken, I’m wearing a Chapstick hat! This is pathetic! I’ve got issues! Well, well, well, a royal flush! You’re bluffing. Am I? Surf’s up, dude! Poo water! That bowl is gnarly. Except for those dirty yellow rings! Kenneth! What are you doing?! You know, I don’t even like honey! I don’t eat it! We need to talk! He’s just a little bee! And he happens to be the nicest bee I’ve met in a long time! Long time? What are you talking about?! Are there other bugs in your life? No, but there are other things bugging me in life. And you’re one of them! Fine! Talking bees, no yogurt night… My nerves are fried from riding on this emotional roller coaster! Goodbye, Ken. And for your information, I prefer sugar-free, artificial sweeteners made by man! I’m sorry about all that. I know it’s got an aftertaste! I like it! I always felt there was some kind of barrier between Ken and me. I couldn’t overcome it. Oh, well. Are you OK for the trial? I believe Mr. Montgomery is about out of ideas. We would like to call Mr. Barry Benson Bee to the

stand. Good idea! You can really see why he’s considered one of the best lawyers… Yeah. Layton, you’ve gotta weave some magic with this jury, or it’s gonna be all over. Don’t worry. The only thing I have to do to turn this jury around is to remind them of what they don’t like about bees. You got the tweezers? Are you allergic? Only to losing, son. Only to losing. Mr. Benson Bee, I’ll ask you what I think we’d all like to know. What exactly is your relationship to that woman? We’re friends. Good friends? Yes. How good? Do you live together? Wait a minute… Are you her little……bedbug? I’ve seen a bee documentary or two. From what I understand, doesn’t your queen give birth to all the bee children? Yeah, but… So those aren’t your real parents! Oh, Barry… Yes, they are! Hold me back! You’re an illegitimate bee, aren’t you, Benson? He’s denouncing bees. Don’t y'all date your cousins? Objection! I’m going to pincushion this guy! Adam, don’t! It’s what he wants! Oh, I’m hit!! Oh, lordy, I am hit! Order! Order! The venom! The venom is coursing through my veins! I have been felled by a winged beast of destruction! You see? You can’t treat them like equals! They’re striped savages! Stinging’s the only thing they know! It’s their way! Adam, stay with me. I can’t feel my legs. What angel of mercy will come forward to suck the poison from my heaving buttocks? I will have order in this court. Order! Order, please! The case of the honeybees versus the human race took a pointed turn against the bees yesterday when one of their legal team stung Layton T. Montgomery. Hey, buddy. Hey. Is there much pain? Yeah. I… I blew the whole case, didn’t I? It doesn’t matter. What matters is you’re alive. You could have died. I’d be better off dead. Look at me. They got it from the cafeteria downstairs, in a tuna sandwich. Look, there’s a little celery still on it. What was it like to sting someone? I can’t explain it. It was all… All adrenaline and then… and then ecstasy! All right. You think it was all a trap? Of course. I’m sorry. I flew us right into this. What were we thinking? Look at us. We’re just a couple of bugs in this world. What will the humans do to us if they win? I don’t know. I hear they put the roaches in motels. That doesn’t sound so bad. Adam, they check in, but they don’t check out! Oh, my. Could you get a nurse to close that window? Why? The smoke. Bees don’t smoke. Right. Bees don’t smoke. Bees don’t smoke! But some bees are smoking. That’s it! That’s our case! It is? It’s not over? Get dressed. I’ve gotta go somewhere. Get back to the court and stall. Stall any way you can. And assuming you’ve done step correctly, you’re ready for the tub. Mr. Flayman. Yes? Yes, Your Honor! Where is the rest of your team? Well, Your Honor, it’s interesting. Bees are trained to fly haphazardly, and as a result, we don’t make very good time. I actually heard a funny story about… Your Honor, haven’t these ridiculous bugs taken up enough of this court’s valuable time? How much longer will we allow these absurd shenanigans to go on? They have presented no compelling evidence to support their charges against my clients, who run legitimate businesses. I move for a complete dismissal of this entire case! Mr. Flayman, I’m afraid I’m going to have to consider Mr. Montgomery’s motion. But you can’t! We have a terrific case. Where is your proof? Where is the evidence? Show me the smoking gun! Hold it, Your Honor! You want a smoking gun? Here is your smoking gun. What is that? It’s a bee smoker! What, this? This harmless little contraption? This couldn’t hurt a fly, let alone a bee. Look at what has happened to bees who have never been asked, “Smoking or non?” Is this what nature intended for us? To be forcibly addicted to smoke machines and man-made wooden slat work camps? Living out our lives as honey slaves to the white man? What are we gonna do? He’s playing the species card. Ladies and gentlemen, please, free these bees! Free the bees! Free the bees! Free the bees! Free the bees! Free the bees! The court finds in favor of the bees! Vanessa, we won! I

knew you could do it! High-five! Sorry. I’m OK! You know what this means? All the honey will finally belong to the bees. Now we won’t have to work so hard all the time. This is an unholy perversion of the balance of nature, Benson. You’ll regret this. Barry, how much honey is out there? All right. One at a time. Barry, who are you wearing? My sweater is Ralph Lauren, and I have no pants. What if Montgomery’s right? What do you mean? We’ve been living the bee way a long time, 27 million years. Congratulations on your victory. What will you demand as a settlement? First, we’ll demand a complete shutdown of all bee work camps. Then we want back the honey that was ours to begin with, every last drop. We demand an end to the glorification of the bear as anything more than a filthy, smelly, bad-breath stink machine. We’re all aware of what they do in the woods. Wait for my signal. Take him out. He’ll have nauseous for a few hours, then he’ll be fine. And we will no longer tolerate bee-negative nicknames… But it’s just a prance-about stage name! …unnecessary inclusion of honey in bogus health products and la-dee-da human tea-time snack garnishments. Can’t breathe. Bring it in, boys! Hold it right there! Good. Tap it. Mr. Buzzwell, we just passed three cups, and there’s gallons more coming! I think we need to shut down! Shut down? We’ve never shut down. Shut down honey production! Stop making honey! Turn your key, sir! What do we do now? Cannonball! We’re shutting honey production! Mission abort. Aborting pollination and nectar detail. Returning to base. Adam, you wouldn’t believe how much honey was out there. Oh, yeah? What’s going on? Where is everybody? Are they out celebrating? They’re home. They don’t know what to do. Laying out, sleeping in. I heard your Uncle Carl was on his way to San Antonio with a cricket. At least we got our honey back. Sometimes I think, so what if humans liked our honey? Who wouldn’t? It’s the greatest thing in the world! I was excited to be part of making it. This was my new desk. This was my new job. I wanted to do it really well. And now… Now I can’t. I don’t understand why they’re not happy. I thought their lives would be better! They’re doing nothing. It’s amazing. Honey really changes people. You don’t have any idea what’s going on, do you? What did you want to show me? This. What happened here? That is not the half of it. Oh, no. Oh, my. They’re all wilting. Doesn’t look very good, does it? No. And whose fault do you think that is? You know, I’m gonna guess bees. Bees? Specifically, me. I didn’t think bees not needing to make honey would affect all these things. It’s not just flowers. Fruits, vegetables, they all need bees. That’s our whole SAT test right there. Take away produce, that affects the entire animal kingdom. And then, of course… The human species? So if there’s no more pollination, it could all just go south here, couldn’t it? I know this is also partly my fault. How about a suicide pact? How do we do it? I’ll sting you, you step on me. That just kills you twice. Right, right. Listen, Barry… sorry, but I gotta get going. I had to open my mouth and talk. Vanessa? Vanessa? Why are you leaving? Where are you going? To the final Tournament of Roses parade in Pasadena. They’ve moved it to this weekend because all the flowers are dying. It’s the last chance I’ll ever have to see it. Vanessa, I just wanna say I’m sorry. I never meant it to turn out like this. I know. Me neither. Tournament of Roses. Roses can’t do sports. Wait a minute. Roses. Roses? Roses! Vanessa! Roses?! Barry? Roses are flowers! Yes, they are. Flowers, bees, pollen! I know. That’s why this is the last parade. Maybe not. Could you ask him to slow down? Could you slow down? Barry! OK, I made a huge mistake. This is a total disaster, all my fault. Yes, it kind of is. I’ve ruined the planet. I wanted to help you with the flower shop. I’ve made it worse. Actually, it’s completely closed down. I thought maybe you were remodeling. But I have another idea, and it’s greater than my previous ideas combined. I don’t want to

hear it! All right, they have the roses, the roses have the pollen. I know every bee, plant and flower bud in this park. All we gotta do is get what they’ve got back here with what we’ve got. Bees. Park. Pollen! Flowers. Repollination! Across the nation! Tournament of Roses, Pasadena, California. They’ve got nothing but flowers, floats and cotton candy. Security will be tight. I have an idea. Vanessa Bloome, FTD. Official floral business. It’s real. Sorry, ma'am. Nice brooch. Thank you. It was a gift. Once inside, we just pick the right float. How about The Princess and the Pea? I could be the princess, and you could be the pea! Yes, I got it. Where should I sit? What are you? I believe I’m the pea. The pea? It goes under the mattresses. Not in this fairy tale, sweetheart. I’m getting the marshal. You do that! This whole parade is a fiasco! Let’s see what this baby’ll do. Hey, what are you doing?! Then all we do is blend in with traffic……without arousing suspicion. Once at the airport, there’s no stopping us. Stop! Security. You and your insect pack your float? Yes. Has it been in your possession the entire time? Would you remove your shoes? Remove your stinger. It’s part of me. I know. Just having some fun. Enjoy your flight. Then if we’re lucky, we’ll have just enough pollen to do the job. Can you believe how lucky we are? We have just enough pollen to do the job! I think this is gonna work. It’s got to work. Attention, passengers, this is Captain Scott. We have a bit of bad weather in New York. It looks like we’ll experience a couple hours delay. Barry, these are cut flowers with no water. They’ll never make it. I gotta get up there and talk to them. Be careful. Can I get help with the Sky Mall magazine? I’d like to order the talking inflatable nose and ear hair trimmer. Captain, I’m in a real situation. What’d you say, Hal? Nothing. Bee! Don’t freak out! My entire species… What are you doing? Wait a minute! I’m an attorney! Who’s an attorney? Don’t move. Oh, Barry. Good afternoon, passengers. This is your captain. Would a Miss Vanessa Bloome in 24B please report to the cockpit? And please hurry! What happened here? There was a DustBuster, a toupee, a life raft exploded. One’s bald, one’s in a boat, they’re both unconscious! Is that another bee joke? No! No one’s flying the plane! This is JFK control tower, Flight 356. What’s your status? This is Vanessa Bloome. I’m a florist from New York. Where’s the pilot? He’s unconscious, and so is the copilot. Not good. Does anyone onboard have flight experience? As a matter of fact, there is. Who’s that? Barry Benson. From the honey trial?! Oh, great. Vanessa, this is nothing more than a big metal bee. It’s got giant wings, huge engines. I can’t fly a plane. Why not? Isn’t John Travolta a pilot? Yes. How hard could it be? Wait, Barry! We’re headed into some lightning. This is Bob Bumble. We have some late-breaking news from JFK Airport, where a suspenseful scene is developing. Barry Benson, fresh from his legal victory… That’s Barry! …is attempting to land a plane, loaded with people, flowers and an incapacitated flight crew. Flowers?! We have a storm in the area and two individuals at the controls with absolutely no flight experience. Just a minute. There’s a bee on that plane. I’m quite familiar with Mr. Benson and his no-account compadres. They’ve done enough damage. But isn’t he your only hope? Technically, a bee shouldn’t be able to fly at all. Their wings are too small… Haven’t we heard this a million times? “The surface area of the wings and body mass make no sense.” Get this on the air! Got it. Stand by. We’re going live. The way we work may be a mystery to you. Making honey takes a lot of bees doing a lot of small jobs. But let me tell you about a small job. If you do it well, it makes a big difference. More than we realized. To us, to everyone. That’s why I want to get bees back to working together. That’s the bee way! We’re not made of Jell-O. We get behind a fellow. Black and yellow! Hello! Left, right, down, hover. Hover? Forget hover. This isn’t so hard.

Beep-beep! Beep-beep! Barry, what happened?! Wait, I think we were on autopilot the whole time. That may have been helping me. And now we’re not! So it turns out I cannot fly a plane. All of you, let’s get behind this fellow! Move it out! Move out! Our only chance is if I do what I’d do, you copy me with the wings of the plane! Don’t have to yell. I’m not yelling! We’re in a lot of trouble. It’s very hard to concentrate with that panicky tone in your voice! It’s not a tone. I’m panicking! I can’t do this! Vanessa, pull yourself together. You have to snap out of it! You snap out of it. You snap out of it. You snap out of it! You snap out of it! You snap out of it! You snap out of it! Hold it! Why? Come on, it’s my turn. How is the plane flying? I don’t know. Hello? Benson, got any flowers for a happy occasion in there? The Pollen Jocks! They do get behind a fellow. Black and yellow. Hello. All right, let’s drop this tin can on the blacktop. Where? I can’t see anything. Can you? No, nothing. It’s all cloudy. Come on. You got to think bee, Barry. Thinking bee. Thinking bee. Thinking bee! Thinking bee! Thinking bee! Wait a minute. I think I’m feeling something. What? I don’t know. It’s strong, pulling me. Like a 27-million-year-old instinct. Bring the nose down. Thinking bee! Thinking bee! Thinking bee!  What in the world is on the tarmac? Get some lights on that! Thinking bee! Thinking bee! Thinking bee! Vanessa, aim for the flower. OK. Out the engines. We’re going in on bee power. Ready, boys? Affirmative! Good. Good. Easy, now. That’s it. Land on that flower! Ready? Full reverse! Spin it around! Not that flower! The other one! Which one? That flower. I’m aiming at the flower! That’s a fat guy in a flowered shirt. I mean the giant pulsating flower made of millions of bees! Pull forward. Nose down. Tail up. Rotate around it around. This is insane, Barry! This’s the only way I know how to fly. Am I koo-koo-kachoo, or is this plane flying in an insect-like pattern? Get your nose in there. Don’t be afraid. Smell it. Full reverse! Just drop it. Be a part of it. Aim for the center! Now drop it in! Drop it in, woman! Come on, already. Barry, we did it! You taught me how to fly! Yes. No high-five! Right. Barry, it worked! Did you see the giant flower? What giant flower? Where? Of course I saw the flower! That was genius! Thank you. But we’re not done yet. Listen, everyone! This runway is covered with the last pollen from the last flowers available anywhere on Earth. That means this is our last chance. We’re the only ones who make honey, pollinate flowers and dress like this. If we’re gonna survive as a species, this is our moment! What do you say? Are we going to be bees, or just Museum of Natural History keychains? We’re bees! Keychain! Then follow me! Except Keychain. Hold on, Barry. Here. You’ve earned this. Yeah! I’m a Pollen Jock! And it’s a perfect fit. All I gotta do are the sleeves. Oh, yeah. That’s our Barry. Mom! The bees are back! If anybody needs to make a call, now’s the time. I got a feeling we’ll be working late tonight! Here’s your change. Have a great afternoon! Can I help who’s next? Would you like some honey with that? It is bee-approved. Don’t forget these. Milk, cream, cheese, it’s all me. And I don’t see a nickel! Sometimes I just feel like a piece of meat! I had no idea. Barry, I’m sorry. Have you got a moment? Would you excuse me? My mosquito associate will help you. Sorry I’m late. He’s a lawyer too? I was already a blood-sucking parasite. All I needed was a briefcase. Have a great afternoon! Barry, I just got this huge tulip order, and I can’t get them anywhere. No problem, Vannie. Just leave it to me. You’re a lifesaver, Barry. Can I help who’s next? All right, scramble, jocks! It’s time to fly. Thank you, Barry! That bee is living my life! Let it go, Kenny. When will this nightmare end?! Let it all go. Beautiful day to fly. Sure is. Between you and me, I was dying to get out of that office. You have got to start thinking bee, my friend. Thinking bee! Me? Hold it. Let’s just stop for a second. Hold

it.  I’m sorry. I’m sorry, everyone.  Can we stop here?  I’m not making a major life decision during a production number!  All right. Take ten, everybody.

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