#maybe it's messy maybe it's boring and needs to be reworked

[rcseadorned]

when the thought of nuking her marvel verse came across my mind

[blondiest]

Asking here so tumblr won't eat your replies in the meronia tag. Do you have any headcanons for them (or for lawlight) in an omegaverse setting?

both grateful to you for the consideration bc UGH!!! WHY IS IT EATING MY POSTS!!! and mildly horrified that i am going to blast this at 8x as many people as i would be blasting it at on my sideblog.

100% kidding. i already spent, like, three separate posts talking about spit at this point, so i think any illusion of dignity i once held is long gone.

however. to be totally honest with you i have spent approximately zero moments thinking about the omegaverse, and i will say i don't have any original thoughts for lawlight ever & have no intention of writing them. i pretty much exclusively enjoy them bc of the immense talent of authors within the fandom; i don't think i would have ever warmed up to the idea of them together otherwise.

so, having it out of the way that my skull is completely empty on this topic, allow me to seriously entertain it. there are a few things that i think work well about the trope, and a few things i think could be tricky. for example— the most obvious upside is that the dynamics give an obvious, easy excuse for characters to act on their attraction to one another despite whatever hurdles stand in the way, which make it an appealing option in some ways for meronia given the somewhat complicated vibes going on there (& there's i guess an opportunity for continued complicated vibes since it could be written to have them hook up before actually sorting through any of the “Mello being bitter as all fuck” shit gets resolved). second thing that i feel like fits nicely for them is the possessiveness aspect because. uhhh. Mello is very abnormal about Near in a lot of ways and imo that's Definitely One Of The Ways He's Weird. third reason that i can, like, see the appeal is that there's the built-in intensity kind of inherent to the trope, which again could be made more interesting and fraught by a persistently messy dynamic between them.

to me what makes it less appealing is that the very basic default dynamic in omegaverse is not one i find particularly compelling for Mello & Near. not saying that it's Bad or Wrong or Incorrect Writing or anything, just that it's not, like, my thing for them. i think the dynamic probably Could be done in a way i would enjoy, i just think it would have to be executed in a certain way. also i am going to put this in the clunkiest way possible bc it's late on my body clock rn (<- excuse; i'm actually just stupid) but like. something about the idea of Near being submissive due to Biology Reasons just kind of bores me idk. i very much enjoy writing him being into Mello bossing him around but i prefer for him to be actively kinda freaky about it tbh, and something about the Innate Biology Stuff of omegaverse kind of dulls that effect for me. maybe there would be a way around it, but that would be a possible sticking point in terms of interest for me.

all of this being said i definitely borrowed a tiny tiny tiny bit from omegaverse for i'm lost and i'm lonely (i hunger for you only) [which is, by the way, not recommended reading as i feel like i need to rework mello's characterization now that i'm more used to writing him, but it's still a concept i like a lot. if you go into it with the knowledge that it's a bit OOC (suspension of disbelief: Mello having a single ounce of emotional intelligence & self-awareness at age 18) then i imagine it could still be kind of a fun, short, highly incomplete read].

i pretty much just borrowed the idea of like, biting & bonding (bc it's. about Near being a vampire. hehe) but it's a T rated fic (... for now) so it's, like. not a sex thing idk. that being said, if i was going to write omegaverse for them (i do not see this happening bc i have a lot of WIPs i find compelling already) it would probably be with the same sort of setup in that fic (mafia Mello coming back to Wammy's bc Near is mysteriously/suspiciously super fucking sick & shit is looking bleak)

anyways. i'm sorry if this isn't what you were hoping for bc i didn't give you literally any headcanons but!! it was a fun question to engage with still, so thank you for asking it. also, final thought, Light is an omega. GOODBYE

[dykedragons]

k not to flex but even though i literally did this sketch in 10 minutes my card base makes it look sooooo sexytown.

half-art and full-art trading card comm mockups respectively!! i uh. needed a full-art mockup. since nobodys ordered one yet. and ill be keeping both of these on my commission page since theyre helpful and look nice ^_^

nerd ass boring rambling under the cut lol

i actually spent the last like, hour or two fixing up my card bases LMAO at first i Just had the half art one prepped and the layers were kinda messy. fixed that. now all the asset layers are nicely organized and labeled :)

and then i made the full-art mockup, which took a while bc i couldnt decide where to put the description/credit at first. when it was in the center it disrupted the flow and made the art look too boxed in. i like where it is now tho

making this card base was also SO MUCH fun btw... and designing the elemental icons?!?!?!?!? i love doing this shit. ui stuff is so fuuunnn especially when its video gamey

like these are so sexy. maybe ill rework the Arcane and Light icons though. those were kinda rushed

tcg comms are some of my favourite to do, bc i dont have to commit to a complete full-body, i can practice dynamic posing and foreshortening and composition, and i get to come up with stats for peoples ocs and thats so fun :) i want to get someone to comm an edgy oc for their card so i can put in some over-the-top ability names like. Blackhole Storm or like. fuckin. Bloodsoaked Blazeblade idfk. some swag anime shit like that. charizard use bloodsoaked blazeblade lmfao

[eveninglottie]

All right so I finished Stormblood (somehow, oh my god those queues are a bitch huh), and I have thoughts.

First thought GEE I don't love being made to be a secondary character in Lyse's story about being promoted to a position she absolutely does not have the qualifications to take? Like, I get it, we need another character to be the funnel for the story because WoL necessarily has to be vague to allow the player to imprint. It was the same in Heavensward, but I felt it was far more seamless? I never felt like I was playing second fiddle to Ysale or Estinien or Aymeric. I was there beside them, and I wasn't just the one you send in to kill the primals and just kinda trail after them. Maybe it was just the framing with Lyse's narration, but the whole time I was just grimacing. It doesn't help that I just really do not like Lyse as a character. I find her to be super basic and uninteresting. I am here for her being an important part of the resistance and maybe rising to a prominent position, but it felt very Basic YA Protagonist who was slumming it in another kingdom until she was summoned back to take her rightful place as her father's heir? And that story can be done well! I mean, Hien had basically the same purpose (I know to mirror hers, it was intentional) but his story was just so much more compelling? Like maybe that's the fantasy monarchist in me but he was the prince, not just the daughter of a general (and not even the good general, I will add, because Raubahn is absolutely King Ala Mhigo for me thanksss). Also, I feel like there's a lot going on in that attractive head of his that doesn't come out. Lyse is so one-note. I know how she's going to react before she does anything. She feels like a lazy character to me, in a story of Super Complicated Characters, like literally everyone else has shades and layers and she's just Justice and Punching.

However. That final confrontation with Zenos was perfection so I will let the Lyse shit slide. Especially if she's not going to be super important moving forward since she's now the queen of Ala Mhigo or whatever and will have other things to do. But like...Zenos's death, the last thing he says about you being his only friend??? Also I know it was him trying to be a dick but when he was like "you and I could walk together if you would only accept me" I was already there baby turn into a crazy dragon that's very sexy of you. Just like...thinking about him being a test subject raised to be a monster and feeling nothing until you show up...it's very romantic. Man-Made Monster feeling joy for the first time in his life is like...peak. Absolutely top notch. He is absolutely insane but I really like him and I'm so glad he's grouped in with all the other scions for Endwalker which I am sure doesn't mean he's part of the team but he's there so that has to mean something and I am standing in this house of cards so please let him tag along or whatever I want Reformed Zenos. Or not even reformed, just like...present. I want him to be present.

But yeah, closing thoughts, I liked it, but if you would have put literally anyone else in the protagonist role I would have liked it a lot more. Lyse is super boring. I'm sorry to be that guy but I'm not really here for Revolutionary Barbie. Heavensward is still top dog, though I am curious to see how things progress in Shadowbringers. That's the one that made me wanna get invested in the first place, so I'm worried it might eclipse dragon elves. But yeah, it wasn't perfection like Heavensward, but it absolutely made me want to write a reworking fic to make it make more sense (also...let WoL be feral, just let them be violent and messy...please I am begging) which means I liked it a lot.

Aymeric is stil bae. (The TWO times he showed up I made The Noise of excitement.) Estinien, why are you not sticking around to say hello. Baby come back. Also, can we please let Y'shtola do shit and not be constantly knocked out or taken out of commission. I would like her to be around more thanks.

Anyway just gotta get through the post-Stormblood content and then it's Emet time babyyyyy.

[autumnslance]

You've been at this a long time lyn. How do you handle feeling like your ocs are too similar or close in design or concept to someone else's?

This is an interesting question, as it’s something I DO struggle with quite often. It’s not unusual to feel this way when writing and/or roleplaying OCs in a big open community--or even in smaller, closed ones! Heck, I even worry my own characters are too similar in too many ways, and that they’re boring iterations of each other (and myself).

You know me, I take a lot of time and words to answer these, so go below the cut for more:

(An older pic of Aeryn meeting up with @eremiss‘ Guinevere Ashe)

It can be especially rough with my WoL, who I literally based on the basic CGI concept for a woman Midlander Warrior of Light that could have been used instead of Meteor, so she doesn’t exactly stand out physically. Even many of her personality traits I came at from the starting point of “the WoL is a near-silent protagonist who opens up and expresses more over time as they develop” and it turns out I’m not the only one with that approach!

Some of the nervousness over such feelings can come from seeing what mutuals are doing; to be 100% honest, I feel like Eremiss and I sometimes have same-brain going on, as there are quite a few things I notice as superficially similar between Gwen and Aeryn, and we seem to see a lot of things about Thancred, the Scions, and our WoLs in similar lights. I’ve definitely had moments when reading her stories where I’m like “I have this same idea and wish I’d written this and oh man if I did now would I be copying and it wouldn’t be as good and--”

And then I tell myself to stop that. Consciously. Firmly.

For one thing, Gwen and Aeryn are NOT the same person, though they have enough common ground we agree that they’d probably get along as friends. I can’t write like Eremiss can, and she doesn’t write like I do. We focus on different aspects of characters and have our individual styles. Our characters look different, have different experiences even in MSQ and in dating the same NPC, and react to things differently.

Same thing when I fret that Aeryn and @phaedra-mero are both painters, or that Aeryn and Zoeya (by @anomaliewrites) are both on the Ace/Demi scale. These similarities are surface-level only.

And really, it’s likely a big reason why we’re all mutuals; we have similar tastes in characters, in writing, in fictional ships. We like the same food and can share it, and we’re lucky that way, really.

I can find inspiration from some of their stories and prompts, and consider how I would write it, how Aeryn would react in those situations. Maybe nothing comes of that, or maybe it develops into a story of my own that inevitably ends up in a different direction and/or different focus--because, again, I’m me, and they’re them, and we don’t write the same. We’ve certainly answered our share of the same prompts differently.

Creative Convergence happens all the time; in professional publishing, they often get seen as trends (all the Teen Wizard books that came out around the same time as HP, all the Vampires and Dystopias, etc). I mean, I accidentally made a character my friends compared to River Tam before I ever heard of Firefly, but my character was a death wizard for a Mage: The Awakening game set in contemporary Boston, not a telepathic martial artist in a future space colony.

It’s also not a bad thing to look at something you’re feeling is too derivative or similar to someone else and consider if you want to change it. If it’s something small--or even something big!--it may be possible to retcon or rework. Or maybe, at least, reconsider the how/why; if both Becky and Sara are Ishgardian orphans who joined the Temple Knights, they might have very different reasons for doing so, and different end goals. Maybe Sara joined for revenge against the dragons and now doesn’t know what to do; maybe Becky joined because it’s the only family tradition she has left. That alone gives them different personalities and motivations and goals despite having a very similar basic summary.

But maybe, while both Becky and Sara are brunettes, Becky decides to wear her hair long and add bright highlights while Sara goes for a buzzcut. Maybe Sara’s player decides the brown was a dye job and makes Sara a redhead instead to distinguish between them more (and then gets to come up with reasons for why and if that has a story/character impact).

So in the end, it’s important to remember that those apparent similarities in concept are surface-level only, even if making an homage of another. You’re going to still tell a different story, in a different way, and the character’s own experiences will lead to their own reactions and results. If you need to make a change, you can make a change--it’s your character, your creation. Conversely, it’s your character and your concepts and your story, so keep it the same and tell it the best you can, in your own way.

And remember: The writer may see the messy drafts and what they did or didn’t do compared to others. The audience just sees and gets more of the type of stories and characters they already enjoy and look for in tags and on Ao3.

[areiton]

call & come (send up an SOS)

Read on AO3

~*~ 

1.

Rhodey gets the call in the middle of a date. 

Well. 

Not the middle. 

Rhodey gets the call when her mouth is around his dick, his balls tight and aching. Blonde hair is caught in his fist and she’s got a gleam in her pretty blue eyes, as he fucks her wet hot mouth, and he’s gonna come, jesus christ and--

His pager goes off. 

Carol comes off his dick with a wet pop and smirks at him. “You wanna get that?” She licks her lips and uses her hand to jack him off. 

She’s got these callouses on her hand from the joystick of her bird, and they drag over his cock in the most delicious of ways. 

“No,” he pants, and she laughs, and moves to take him back in her mouth, and he catches her by the jaw, pulls her up and kisses her, licks the taste of himself out of her mouth and pinches her nipple just to hear the growly little moan she gives up. 

“But I gotta,” he adds. 

He swipes it up, and three little letters blink up at him. 

SOS. 

He sighs, and glances at Carol. She’s sprawled against her sheets, a hand on her cunt and his mouth waters at the sight. 

The pager goes off again and he says, “Got a phone I can borrow, gorgeous?” 

~~ 

He scowls up at a fucking frat house. 

It’s a goddamn frat house, didn’t they outgrow this shit? 

He scowls, and it’s only a little bit because he left Carol biting her orgasm into her arm while his cock ached against his jeans. 

Most of it’s because Tony went to a goddamn frat house. 

He finds Tony quick. It used to surprise him, how he could always find Tony, like a compass pointing north. Now--now it’s just a skill he’s grateful for and let’s it pull him through the party to where Tony is holding court, surrounded by twenty undergrads who look like this might be the first time they’ve ventured out of the labs. He’s perched on a blond giant's lap, and there’s something frenetic about the way he’s moving, his words starting to slur. 

Rhodey once watched Tony defend a PhD thesis, drunk and running on two hours of sleep in seventy two. 

He doesn’t fucking slur. 

Rhodey’s gaze narrows on the hand on Tony’s waist, the way it’s too tight and holding him in place and he bites back a snarl that wants to rip out. 

He’s horny and his best friend is being manhandled and drugged by a fucking frat boy. 

“Honeybear!” Tony crows, and gives a happy little bounce in his new friend’s lap. Rhodey reaches for him, and--

Tony scrambles free and into Rhodey’s arms, tucking himself against Rhodey’s side like he belongs there, a smile brighter than the sun tilted up at him. 

“You’re drunk,” Rhodey says, patient. “Time to go home.” 

Tony grins and let’s himself be guided out of the fucking frat house and Rhodey has a moment, watching a pair of girls making out against the wall, where he regrets it, the way he left Carol, the way he’s still horny and annoyed. 

But Tony called. 

And he came. 

“You smell like sex, Rhodes,” Tony complains, and Rhodey growls, and drags him home. 

~~ 

2.

He's asleep when the pager buzzes. 

He only notices because it's tucked under his arm, near the pillow, and it sends him scrambling across the bed to get away from it, cursing and rubbing his arm. 

"What the fuck, what the fuck," he grumbles, and the damn thing buzzes again. 

It was his idea, is the thing. 

Tony was a walking disaster, and underage to boot, a messy twink with enough money to buy anyone's affections and Rhodey--

Rhodey took one week to realize that was the worst idea in a whole long list of bad ideas. He bought the shitty pagers and tossed one to Tony, and said, "If you need a rescue or a pick up or anything--send me an SOS." 

"I don't need you to play white knight, honeybear," Tony said, curiously staring at it and him. 

"I know you don't," Rhodey told him, even though he did. "But I want you to have that option. If you need help--" 

"Send up an SOS," Tony echoed. 

The thing is--Tony didn't ask for help. Not when he was drowning in assignments and SI work, not when his mom dragged him away from campus for a week in Tuscany, not when he got caught with coke on him at a party or when a boyfriend got too handsy. 

So Rhodey gave him the pager and prayed Tony would use it in emergencies. 

The first call was startling, and terrifying, and Tony had blinked at him over three boxes of donuts, seemingly as startled as Rhodey was that he'd used the damn thing, or maybe that Rhodey responded. 

It was never serious. 

But Rhodey always answered. 

He sighed and scrubbed a hand over his face, looking at the address that popped up and sighing. 

Studying would have to wait. 

~~ 

It takes him less than thirty minutes to dress and make his way across campus to the address, and he blinks at it blearily. It's a restaurant. 

A nice one. 

He groans, and wishes fervently for coffee before fixing a polite smile on his face and pushing inside. 

He sees Tony right away, sprawled messy and far too casual, across from Howard. 

He bites down on his curse, and scoots around the hostess busy with a nice white couple and approaches. Tony's gaze flicks to him, and his eyes brighten. "Rhodey!" he crows. 

"Hey, man. Did you forget we've got that lab this morning?" 

"Shit-" Tony breathes, jerking in his seat. His coffee sloshes and it's too creamy and sweet, but Rhodey eyes it anyway. "I gotta--Howard, I have--" 

"Go," Howard grumbles. "God knows you aren't actually listening to me." 

"Board meeting on the 3rd, new patents pending, rework the Icarus propulsion tech. Mom has a charity thing the 5th she wants me to attend. Anything else?" Tony asks, sweetly, but his smile has teeth. Rhodey huffs, reaches across the table, snagging bacon from Tony’s plate, and it makes the tension rising between father and son break. 

And there's bacon. 

"I'll see you the 3rd," Howard says and Tony tosses off a sloppy salute as he slides out of the booth and Rhodey crunches on his stolen bacon. 

"Let's go, Rhodey, wouldn't want to be late." 

Rhodey nods at Howard and follows Tony from the restaurant and back toward their apartment, and it's only when Tony sighs and the tension drains out of his shoulders does he bump his best friend companionably and say, plaintive, "But you're buying me breakfast, right?" 

Tony laughs, and it's star bright and happy. 

~~

3. 

Pepper's eyes narrow when she sees Rhodey in Tony's office. It's rare enough that anyone is there that he had to wipe a thin layer of dust from the top of Tony's desk. 

He's settling in real well as CEO, then. 

"You do not get to rescue him today," she almost hisses and Rhodey smile, all innocent and beatific. 

"I'm just here to see a friend," he says, spreading his hands. 

She snorts, patently disbelieving, and yeah, ok, that's fair. Rhodey's leave never comes as coincident, and for it to run smack into one of Tony's few visits to the East Coast and the quarterly stock meeting--well. 

He's only surprised that he hasn't been called yet. 

"When did it get started?" she asks, and Rhodey blinks at Pepper. She's been part of Tony's life, making sure it spins properly, for almost three years now, longer than anyone but Happy and himself, and it startles him that she doesn't know the origin of the SOS. 

"College," he says. Shrugs. "Tony was always gettin' himself into trouble. I couldn't babysit constantly, so I got us these pagers." He grins down at the clunky thing. Tony hates it but Rhodey refused to let him upgrade. "Told him that if he ever needed me, all he needed to do was call." 

"And he actually did?" she says, skeptical, and Rhodey grins. 

It took six months for Tony to start using the damn things, and then he used them almost obsessively. It was almost a game. 

He missed it, the calls for coffee, the time he and DUM-E got super-glued together, the petulant frown on Tony's face when he burnt his last box of mac and cheese. 

"Have you ever missed one?" she asks, and Rhodey blinks at her. 

"Of course not," he says, and Pepper's eyes narrow, her mouth opens--

And the pager goes off. 

Rhodey smirks and waves the little black box at her. "Duty calls, Pep," he drawls, and pushes himself out of Tony's desk chair, where he's been lounging like he belongs there, and strolls out of the office. 

She sees him a few minutes later, one arm around Tony's shoulders, the younger man talking animatedly while Rhodey steers him effortlessly toward the elevators. 

She watches them and wonders if either of them can see what she can. 

The fond smile on Rhodey's lips, the eager light in Tony's eyes, the way they tipped toward each other, the way they didn't seem aware of the world around them. 

She sighs as the elevator slides closed behind them, and straightens the files she prepared for this eventuality, and squares her shoulders, stalking into the conference room to finish the Board meeting. 

Rhodey, she thinks, ruefully, isn't the only one who comes so readily to Tony's rescue. 

~~ 

4.

"Sir, you can't come in dressed like that," the maitre d says, a little desperately. 

Rhodey spares her a second glance and the true this--he feels a little guilty. He's in a pair of sweatpants he stole from Tony, SI logo plastered down the leg. A faded, too thing MIT t shirt with holes in the collar. 

He was comfortable, reading a book Happy had suggested because for all that Tony liked to give Happy shit for his taste in TV and literature, the man had only ever passed on books that Rhodey enjoyed. 

He was comfortable, two beers into his evening and happy to spend it relaxed, when he got the call. 

Tony called. 

Rhodey came. 

Didn't mean he was gonna change out of his sweat pants to do it. 

"I just need to grab something," he says, flashing a smile, all the cocky self-assured ego that Tony had taught him. 

It works, and he finds Tony tucked into a corner of the restaurant, a bored expression on his face as he sits across from a gorgeous blonde. 

"Tones," he says and smiles at Tony's friend. She is pretty. 

Nice rack too. 

From the confused little furrow in her brow and the blank look on Tony's, Rhodey thinks she probably has a bigger bra size than IQ. "I'm gonna need to borrow him, darling," he says. 

"Oh, are you going?" 

"National security," Tony nod sagely, and Rhodey rolls his eyes, and drags the smaller man out of the damn five-star restaurant. 

They take a shitty cab back to Rhodey's apartment without really talking about it and Tony strips down to a Air Force tshirt he steals from Rhodey's dresser and plaid pajama pants that puddle over his bare feet before curling against Rhodey's side and stealing his beer.

"Want me to order pizza?" Rhodey asks. 

"Chinese?" Tony says, hopefully, and Rhodey rumbles a laugh, adjust to the weight of the other man against his side and reaching for his phone. 

"She wasn't bad," Tony says, after he's ordered and Rhodey is reading again, one hand drifting through Tony's hair. He's laying quiet against Rhodey's side, uncharacteristically quiet, and the small admission draws Rhodey's gaze. "She was just--" 

"Not smart?" 

Tony nods, miserably and Rhodey sighs. "Why do it then? Why date the ones you know aren't smart enough to keep up with you?" 

"No one can keep up with me," Tony says, and he sounds so forlorn, so lonely, it makes Rhodey's chest hurt. 

"I can," he says, without thinking and Tony's gaze flicks up, wide and startled. Too open. It makes something in his chest go tight and aching and he smiles, a quick teasing thing. "If I can, you can find someone else who will." 

Tony grins and the moment slips past, but it doesn't go away, as they eat Chinese, as Tony sips his beer and listens to Rhodey read to him, as they curl together in Rhodey's big bed, and the darkness. 

He can't stop seeing the hope, copper bright and shining, in Tony's eyes. 

~~ 

5.

The thing is. 

The thing is, he’s been with Tony now--best friend, brother, keeper, something--for almost than he hasn’t. Tony is as much as much a part of him as his mama, as much as his uniform and his duty, and he can’t imagine a life where he doesn’t answer, when Tony calls. 

He can’t imagine who he’d be, if he weren’t the other half of Stark & Rhodes, of Tones & Rhodey. 

He doesn’t even want to imagine it. 

He does, however, wish he could sleep a whole night through, sometimes. 

He glares blearily at the phone that replaced the beeper two years ago, when Tony’s finally died and couldn’t be revived. 

Tony will never admit it, but Rhodey’s pretty sure even he misses the clunky relics of their childhood. 

The phone flashes, red and white, SOS bright in the dark and he thinks, just for a moment, of not answering. 

Of calling or sending Pepper or Happy or just pretending he hadn’t gotten it. 

He yawns, hard enough his jaw cracks, and crawls out of bed. 

~~ 

He pulls up to the club and send a text because he loves Tony, he does, he’ll chase him down and rescue him even in the dead of night, but there’s a limit and they are closer to forty now than thirty, and he’s not dragging him out of a club. 

He send the same text to Happy, and then slouches in his seat, rubbing at his eyes tiredly. 

It takes less than ten minutes, which might be a new record, before Tony is crawling into the passenger side of the truck. He smells of booze and sex, and Rhodey arches an eyebrow and Tony shakes his head. “Not mine.” 

Rhodey makes a quiet noise, and pulls into traffic. Tony is quiet at his side, long enough that Rhodey finally glances at him, and he’s a little surprised to see Tony watching him. He’s quiet, and there’s eyeliner smeared under his eyes, making them larger than normal, and he’s still. 

“You ok?” Rhodey asks, softly and Tony smiles. 

It’s a tiny smile, familiar and sweet,and it makes him ache, because that smile is his. 

Shy and boyish and so real it almost hurts. 

“Why do you come rescue me? I’m not an idiot child at MIT anymore, honeybear,” Tony says. 

“Why do you still call? You don’t need me to rescue you,” Rhodey answers, and Tony laughs. 

He reaches out, tangles their fingers together and squeezes. And even after twenty years of sharing space and life, Tony’s casual way of touching makes his heart flip and plunge and soar. 

“I’ll always need you to rescue me,” Tony murmurs. 

Rhodey squeezes his hand, and they lapse back into silence. And then, coaxing and sweet, Tony says, “Will you buy me donuts?” 

Rhodey laughs. 

~~ 

+1

 His fingers rub over his phone, compulsively. Taptaptap. Tap. Tap. Tap. Taptaptap. 

It’s been eighty-eight days. 

~~ 

At first, he’d tapped it on his leg, while he lay in a medic’s gurney, and demanded to know what the hell happened, demanded to know where Tony was. 

No one answered, and his phone was trashed, and by the time he had one again--they’d told him.

A bombing. 

Mass casualties. 

Tony Stark, missing. Presumed dead. 

Rhodey threw a fit, when they said that, a screaming raging thing that ended with him strapped back to his goddamn gurney, a needle in his arm. 

“You’ll hurt yourself,” someone said. 

He fucking hoped. 

~~ 

He stares at the night sky and he stares at the bunk above him, and he stares at the blank sky outside his plane window and the desert beyond the helicopter and the wide open sky that he’s always loved and hates now. 

Taptaptap. Tap. Tap. Tap. Taptaptap. 

~~ 

“I heard you’re still looking,” Stane said, and Rhodey stared at him, blank and unemotional. 

The older man--Tony’s partner, Tony’s godfather, Tony’s but not Tony--smiles, oil slick and cold. “You can’t keep looking, Rhodes. There’s nothing to find.” 

Rhodey smiled, regulation sharp and precise and empty. “Sir.” 

“You’re still looking,” Pepper said, and Rhodey stared at her. Tony’s friend, red-eyed and barely held together, and he squeezed her hand. 

“Don’t stop,” she said, fiercely. 

“Ma’am,” he breathed. 

~~ 

The dust stings his eyes, and he wants to close them and he wants to scream, and he wants--

Tony. He wants Tony. 

The phone is quiet in his hand, a dead talisman. Taptaptap. Tap. Tap. Tap. Taptaptap. 

~~ 

“You keep chasing a ghost, you’ll throw away your career,” his CO warned him and Rhodey stared into the middle distance. 

“Are you ordering me to stand down?” he asked. 

“Would you listen, if I did?” 

Twenty years and a thousand SOS calls, a thousand rescues when Tony never once needed him, and now--

His phone was quiet and still and his jaw clenched. “No, sir.” 

~~ 

“Colonel,” someone shouts, and Rhodey watches a patch of mountains explode on the radar and his heart squeezes. 

Taptaptap. Tap. Tap. Tap. Taptaptap. 

~~ 

He didn’t sleep. 

He didn’t sleep because when he slept, he dreamt, and Tony wasn’t missing there, he was dead, a bloody broken body with so many others, and Rhodey was too late, an unanswered call. 

He didn’t sleep. 

He just hoped.

~~ 

The helicopter blades thrum and all he can hear is taptaptap. Tap. Tap. Tap. Taptaptap. 

They bank and search and all he can feel is taptaptap. Tap. Tap. Tap. Taptaptap. 

“Sir!” 

He falls out of the copter and into the sand, stumbling, and his heart goes taptaptap. Tap. Tap. Tap. Taptaptap. 

~~ 

Tony clutches him, sobbing silent, and his fingers dig into Rhodey’s fatigues, into his skin, and Rhodey holds him close, presses Tony’s head to his chest, and feels it. 

Taptaptap. Tap. Tap. Tap. Taptaptap. 

He bites back his sob, and tightens his grip. 

“I’ve got you,” he breathes into filthy hair, into Tony, lips brushing over his temple. 

~~ 

Rhodey holds him, when Tony falls asleep against his chest in the chopper, heartbeat steady under his skin, and the rhythmic tapping fades away. 

He’s here. 

He’s safe. 

He’s home. 

[captaingondolin]

those are too many wips. 

here’s a list with brief summaries, and then you can tell me what to finish first because i am suffering from big time choice paralysis. anon is on. ask away.

ace Obi-Wan vague idea: what it says on the tin. it was going to involve teen Obi-Wan, friendship with Quinlan and Luminara. in which Obi-Wan is interested in sex... in theory. academically. he’s his suave, charming self, and will experiment for the hell of it. (i was slightly uncomfortable with the premise of, basically, a fic about an asexual character all about... well, sex. but i wanted to work some shit out and what better way than overprojecting over fictional characters?)

Anakin in lingerie: just polishing up an old tumblr post. modern AU.

Anakin in makeup obianidala: again from an old post with subskywalker. but i wanted to give it a structure

Ani5dala FIX IT: OH MAN I WAS SO EXCITED ABOUT THIS. i have tons of notes and no energy to proceed. in which Fox has a plan to keep Fives alive, Fives has a plan to keep the Republic alive - but Anakin is being a butt and Fives needs Pamé’s help. (probably Anakin and Fives were together before? + anidala open relationship, i was thinking, but idk yet)

AWOL Cody: oh boy, i started plotting this for my pod-together 2018 project with litra. in which Obi-Wan is declared KIA, but there is NO BODY and also suspicious footage/Ahsoka saw something and Cody is NOT having it so he goes on a solo mission to save him. codywan.

Darkness is but a passing thing: same as above, it was supposed to be written in 2018, good grief. post rots, sort of time-travellish, i’m not saying more bc most of the plot was litra’s and idk if she wants to share.

Detonate: translation into english of my italian obikin smut, which i promised ages ago.

enemies to colleagues to lovers codywan: this, but with a proper outline this is now being Properly Plotted. there are mindmaps. and a Scrivener file.

Jedi OC: from a prompt from last year’s rarepair exchange: Male Jedi Who Accidentally Keeps Causing Property Damage/Male Owner of Said Property (words written: 0, but the idea was funny)

Laurea traduzione: eng translation of my italian modern au obikin

Leia using the Force: a messy messy file with more than one idea in, actually. i wasn’t sure wether to go with child or teen Leia (post Princess of Alderaan plot) but then i got distracted with making Leia and Kaeden meet. Ahsoka/Kaeden.

million: from a fic exchange request in which someone said they’d read “a million words” of Bly and Aayla being disgustingly in love. just that. with a side of codywan (the irony of Bly being all like “ugh, THOSE TWO” fuelled the first few hundred words).

obianidala with nb Anakin: wait, isn’t this kinda related to the Anakin in makeup one? my plotbunnies are a mess. maybe from this or this post.

ObiBail Empire Era AND OR others: frankly. a disaster mess probably inspired by the beginning of Til the casket drops and Wild Space.

ObiBail obianidala Breha super poly dinner: this post, but in fic form

ObiBailRex: this one is funny. i found the first few sentences handwritten in a notebook and i have no memory of where i wanted to go from there, but damn, i liked those. Obi-Wan forces Cody to take some leave, and Cody forces Rex to play babysitter to his General and his Senator friend. shenanigans ensue.

storms: ahahah, another fic pending since..... uuuh...... the clone wars exchange from, again, 2018? (how much shit did i sign up for that summer? i was in the midst of moving!! why am i like this). sorry perspicacia, if you’re even still around. preparing for that fic was how i got in to obi/rex tho? and it still doesn’t have a plot.

unhinged Obi-Wan vs Grievous: this, but with a plot. if i can find the plot. why is plotting so hard? no plotting, only cool scenes. (sith/fallen!obi getting the 212th to follow him and go rogue?? maybe?) see “enemies to colleagues to lovers” above

when the numbers get to zero: a Rex/Padmé i love a lot but that, as usual with ALL my damn fic, has no structure. inspired by the blue shadow virus eps. (i posted a snippet ages ago - oh wait, here’s another one)

now onto the folders!

keep verse

untitled about other Clones finding out, and the consequences. “It’s Bly who finds out first through the GAR grapevine. Cody was supposed to be dead - and suddenly he wasn’t.”

Pilots (ot era)

Oblivious Pilots - The entire Rogue Squadron is made of oblivious disasters. They share one braincell, and Nawara is the only one who’s actually using it. 

Dark Imperial AU - Luke is raised by Vader. but when he meets Wedge and Tycho...

Skystrike Academy AU - Luke is raised by Owen, Beru... and Obi-Wan. And he signs up to train as TIE pilot as part of a Resistance plan

WedgeTycho - the tiniest spark of an idea. Alderanian philosophy, Tycho being pretentious, sad, grieving, and in need of a hug.

SitS - A Light from the Shadows

SitS stands for “the Sith in the Senate”, the working title for this epic I’ve been plotting since 2018 that might never see the light because I went “I want a well-adjusted, non traumatised Obi-Wan!”, build a whole new canon around that ......and then got bored of it, obviously, since I love to see Obes suffer. but there were tons of things I liked and maybe I should rework it somehow? (it was supposed to be obikin. then obianidala. then i think i got distracted and got Cody to flirt with Obi-Wan. who knows at this point. what if I throw in Jango)

soft now verse

parts 2.1 and 2.2 are there and almost ready and filled with clones feels (yes, this was a fix it obianidala fluff, but CLONES)

Space Dads Extraordinaire

Hope in Unexpected Places pt 2 and maybe 3 or maybe that’s a separate story? I have feelings about smol Boba interacting with Obi-Wan and learning to trust him, but don’t know how to handle them. There should also be the bit where they find Jango’s pet strill, which I promised to Lulu like a year ago.

the life and opinions

this is a cursed title, i started a fic with a similar title in another fandom almost 15 years ago and never finished it. it was supposed to be a biography of Rex and his rise through the ranks and into an AU where the vode have their own governing body. a shitton of Rex and Cody brotherly feels but maybe also ship? why can’t i pick a dynamic

Thrawn

browser history - Thranto moments told through Eli’s holonet searches

your silence is my favourite word - Emperor Eli angsty smut

new rules - Emperor Eli AU, but make it reasonably happy

see me like this - Emperor Eli AU, angst cranked up to the max

bb Thrawn - Thranto AU in which Thrawn is a weird child, the Chiss have some more contact with humans and Eli & Thrawn meet as kids

forgotten words - Thrawn growing up in the Empire, raised by Palpatine. 

[likedoves]

Hello! Not sure if you’ve been actively lately (tumblr needs a time stamp function) but if you are, can you pick two of your OC’s and tell me about them? I love hearing about others peoples ocs! What made you want to bring them to life?

hello!! i have been active actually!! i just started this blog like two nights ago lolol

also thank you for indulging me. this got a little longer than i anticipated so i’m gonna stuff it under a read more

edit: i linked their pinboards to their names also just for fun

ire orchid crouse (they/he/she)

they’re the main character of the wip i’ve started outlining (it has no title currently). i make a lot of like,, well-adjusted characters? and soft characters? and ire started as sort of a “i’m bored and i need something fresh” so i made a really messy person out of them. a fun mess, but a mess all the same. she “whores around” and uses sarcasm to keep people at a distance to protect herself, and struggles with alcoholism for a bit.

basically like at the core ire very much doesn’t like himself and doesn’t think other people like him either so he overcompensates by pretending to be a lot more cocky and confident than he feels–very much a fake it ‘til you make it type. and in a way it works? by being such a cocky insufferable little shit they can control the reason people don’t like them, and can pretend that people just don’t like the front that they put up (so they reject the persona and not…ire themself). by avoiding being vulnerable and real they’re able to evade an actual rejection. as a result they have a lot of acquaintances, but not a lot of friends.

their roommate (and best friend!!!) is a girl named cynthia. she’s super important in ire’s recovery process. they’re both super good and their friendship is important to me and i could go on for ten years about it but i’ll leave it there. she’s the only person who really knows ire aside from their love interest, and they really really care about her.

penemphriel (they/he)

soo pen and ire are kinda polar opposites lol. penemphriel is easily my favorite oc right now but i will try to keep this concise. they’re one of my handfuls of angel ocs from a collaborative wip i’ve concocted with my best friend. idk how likely it is that we’ll start it but we reaaaally want to. i brought penemphriel to life originally because i just wanted an angel oc but they became a commentary on individuality and love and learning to live for yourself and how much i personally dislike literary tragedies and religion as an institution along the way. it got slightly out of hand in a good way

anyways so they’re an archangel, and pretty low on the totem of power (i will not bore you with the 16 metric tons of half-baked lore i came up with at 3am yet). even though they aren’t the most powerful of angels, they are one of the oldest–they’ve been around since the very, very beginning. essentially their job was to be “mankind’s shepherd” as they would put it, to watch over humanity and, most importantly, not to interfere. generally speaking. they were meant to sort of,, gently guide people back to heaven and protect them from demons and that sort of thing. natural disasters, wars, etc.? out of their hands.

as such they were made with Love. like a lot of love. like god took a bucket of love and poured it into penemphriel, and that was the mistake. pen was made to love people and he just loves them too damn much! it results in a lot of anguish on their part because they’re very caught in between being obedient and letting themself…want things. their whole mission is to help people achieve happiness and peace. i’m in the process of reworking the entire storyline but here are the highliiiiiights

- maybe kinda sorta almost fall in love with michelangelo- adopt and raise a young cherub named raziel (their dearest little sister, the apple of their eye, she will always be a darling little fledgling in their heart)- maybe kinda sorta have their wings stolen by an asshole demon- from there they go to work at a bookstore run by a crotchety old woman, meet a much nicer demon, and i refuse to spoil the rest (cough but maybe they fall in love with the nice demon man and they get married and live a happy and fulfilled life idk)

i have a lot of feelings about them Aha,, there’s a lot more lore to them than to ire just because they’re immortal and have existed since the dawn of time so. there’s a lot i didn’t cover as far as backstory and general,, themes….i really could write an essay (or hopefully a nove someday). i might be posting snippets about them because i really love them!!

[niall-is-my-dream]

Songbird - Part Four

“When Erin decides to perform one of her favourite songs at a bar, she didn’t expect one of the singers, Niall Horan, to be in the audience. What started as an appreciation for her cover quickly turns into more than either bargained for.”

(Previously known as Fools Gold, this fic has been edited, reworked and finally finished!)

Thanks to @angryniall for being an amazing beta!

As always let me know what you think.

Em x

Catch up below

https://niall-is-my-dream.tumblr.com/post/184528124078/songbird-masterlist

3655 words

Erin's POV

You woke up the next day, with Niall's chest pressed up against your back and the covers wrapped tightly around you both. You still couldn't quite believe that you were laying in his arms. You laid there enjoying every moment, knowing that even if you were to carry on seeing him that these moments would be rare. He was busy with his job and he would be away for weeks at a time. You could feel your heart tightening at the prospect of that. You'd told yourself not to get too attached to him when you began texting each other.

But in less than 2 weeks you'd fallen for him. You held back your tears and let out a silent sob, your whole body trembling.

You felt his arms tighten around you.

"You ok darlin?" He whispered against your shoulder, as he placed soft kisses there.

"Yeah, just a bit cold." You replied pulling the covers up higher, and trying to compose yourself.

"It's nice and and warm under here." He said pulling your hair away from your neck.

"Mmmmm, it is." You said snuggling your body back against his warm chest, feeling his morning erection. You heard him moan against your shoulder as you brushed across it. You wiggled your bum against him again and he pulled your hips up so his cock was laying hard against your bum.

His hand soon wandered up under your top and he caressed your breasts, rolling your nipple between his finger and thumb. You started to roll your bum up and down his erection.

"Fuck......." He mumbled against your shoulders. "Want you so much."

You moved his hand from your breast and down between your legs, letting him feel how much you wanted him too.

"So wet for me." He whispered as he pulled your pjs and knickers slowly down. You pulled them the rest of the way off as he, in turn, took off his own boxers.

His hand found its way back to your hips and you lifted your arm up and wrapped it around his neck, running your fingers through his soft hair. You started to grind against his length and could feel the tip of his cock against your bum.

His hands quickly tilted you and you could feel him right at your entrance. His mouth was attached to your neck and shoulders, nipping and sucking. You moaned out as he slipped himself inside you bare. "Fuck you feel so good." He mumbled against your neck.

He used his free arm to bend your knee up, as he sank deeper and deeper inside you. Rocking his hips against you, and you felt his warm breath against your shoulder. You needed to kiss him, needed to see him. You brought your arm down and let him slip from inside you before rolling on your back and pulling him down on top of you. He used his knee to nudge apart your legs more, before settling himself in between them and slowly easing himself back inside you.

He used one arm to steady himself and the other to bring up your knee helping him sink deeper inside you. He began rocking his hips at an agonizingly slow pace, you could feel every vein and ridge in his cock inside you. His eyes met yours, and you began to feel totally overwhelmed by how right it felt.

Your arms were wrapped around his neck and you felt him shudder as you ran your nails down his back. He leaned down nudging at your nose, his gaze still never leaving you. God you had fallen for him. His lips travelled over your mouth and along your jaw and he buried his head in the crook of your neck.

He continued rocking his hips against you and you tilted yours to meet his thrusts. He hit your g spot almost instantly at that movement.

"God Niall, just right there..............don't..........stop." You whispered but you were unsure if he had heard you.

His body flush with yours, his pubic bone rubbing against your clit, while his chest hair was brushing across your already sensitive nipples.

You felt his cock twitch inside you, but you could tell he was holding back, wanting you to cum first. The thought of him being right on the edge made your body react.

"Niall........fuck......I'm........keep........there." You cried out.

Your body withering underneath him. The most intense orgasm you had ever had came tumbling over your body. He continued rolling his hips against you as you rode it out.

"Fuck..Erin." He mumbled into your neck as he released his sticky warm release inside you. He grunted as he rocked his hips a few more times, before stilling inside you.

He let your hip fall back down and used his hand to brush your hair out of your face, he didn't say anything but kissed you deeply, only stopping when feeling himself soften inside you. He reached over to your bedside table and grabbed some tissues for you both. As he pulled out of you he began cleaning you both up. He looking amazing kneeling between you looking thoroughly fucked.

"Want to shower then get breakfast?" He asked smiling as he leaned above you and kissed your lips.

"Mmmm, sounds good." You said smiling back.

Things felt different this morning with him. You took a long and lazy shower together, holding each other closely, not saying a word. You washed and got out when the water ran cold.

Niall started breakfast while you sat and dried your hair. You joined him ten minutes later as he was cutting your bacon sandwiches and placing them on plates.

You leaned in and kissed him as he handed you yours, a cheeky grin on his face.

"Care to share?" You asked smirking at him.

"Share?"

"Yeah, what your cheeky grin is all about?"

"Nothing, just happy this morning." He said squeezing your hip and that grin appearing on his face again.

You smiled shaking your head.

You laid on your sofa that morning, a thick fleece blanket covering you both. The tv was on, but you had your back to it. You were facing Niall, your noses almost touching as you cuddled up to each other.

"This is perfect." He whispered. "Could literally lie here forever with you."

"Yeah? You wouldn't get bored just lying around? I've noticed you're quite a fidget." You giggled as you stroked your fingers across his chest.

"Yeah, I am normally but............. I don't know, just like being with you all the time....... being close." He replied, stroking his fingers over your hips and up towards your back. "Been a while since I've felt anything close to this."

"Me too." You replied, not being able to contain your grin at the admission of his sweet words.

"I've got a lot of travelling this year with my tour." He said, and you dropped your gaze from his.

Your heart sank a little.

"But I've got a few breaks in between where I'll be in London. I'd really like to keep seeing you."

"I'd really like that too." You said looking back up at him. His eyes were the bluest you'd ever seen and to be honest, you would've agreed to anything he wanted in that moment.

"Maybe exclusively?" He asked.

"Exclusively?"

"Yeah, you know?......just you and me..... dating...... no one else." He replied and you could tell he was nervous.

You'd only known each other just over two weeks. But in that time you had spent hours in each others company. You had talked into the small hours of the morning about your families, funny stories of things you'd done. It had felt like you had know each other for years not weeks.

You blushed and tucked yourself up into the crook of his neck.

"I'd love that." You whispered.

"It won't be easy....... being with me. Some fans are quite passionate about my private life. We would need to keep things amongst our close friends and family. If that's ok."

"I'm happy with keeping things private, even if you weren't famous I wouldn't want to blab about it to everyone."

"I don't want you to feel like I'm hiding you."

"Niall, it's fine. I understand how difficult it can be for you. I'd really like to see how this goes between us."

"Me too." He replied.

You could feel his jaw stretch into a smile as he cuddled you closer. As much as you'd tried not to fall for him, you had.

You hoped he felt the same.

Both of you cuddled up under the blanket, and slowly drifted off to sleep.

A loud knock on your door woke you both up from your nap. You had no idea who it could be as you weren't expecting anyone. You managed to detangle yourself from Niall and straighten out your clothes. He sat up and did the same, trying to tame his messy hair. You reached the door, and looked through the peep hole, to see Michelle standing there.

You quietly took a step back and made your way back to the living room, your fingers pressed against your lips to silence Niall who was about to ask you who it was.

"Michelle." You whispered to him so quietly that you were surprised he'd heard you. But you saw him form an 'oh' on his lips.

Your phone began vibrating on the floor, Michelle's name on the caller id. You knew you couldn't answer the door to her. She'd want to come in for a catch up, and there was no way she'd be with you for less than an hour and you couldn't expect Niall to hide in your bedroom. Plus his stuff was scattered across your living room. His guitar was rested against yours and there were NH guitar picks on the coffee table. His coat, hat and boots were in the hall, two lots of plates and mugs drying on the drainer. Plus the flat just smelt like him.

She'd know straight away. You let your phone go to voicemail.

Niall looked up at you from where he had laid back down, he clearly wasn't sure what to say.

"That was close." You whispered sitting on the sofa next to where he lay.

"You ok?" He whispered back.

"Yeah I'm fine, I just can't deal with her. I can't trust her with this." You replied, gesturing between the both of you.

"You're quite a private person aren't you?" He asked.

"Yeah, I suppose I am. Just don't see the point in blabbing about everything to people. It's no ones else's business, but mine."

"That's kind of how I am. I share stuff with my fans, but not everything. I prefer to keep relationships private."

"Well I'm happy to keep us dating private."

"Not actually had the pleasure of taking you on a date yet." He laughed.

"No, you haven't have you?!"

"Might have to sort that out." He smiled.

"Think you should!" You laughed back. "Come on, let's get some lunch."

You stood in the kitchen making sandwiches together, before sitting on the sofa under the blanket again.

"So what's the plan for tonight?" You asked taking a bite.

"Pub with your brother?"

"You sure about that?" You said raising your eyebrows.

"Yeah.......why......... should I be scared?!" He asked a nervous laugh escaping his lips.

"Not of Ross, although he his protective. I just meant about going out in public with me."

"There's a group of us right?"

"Yeah Ross, his wife Amy and about 6 others I think."

"Do you want me to go with you?" He asked and you could tell he was nervous. He picked at his sandwich on the plate.

"I....um......." You reply not sure how to tell him your fears.

"Ah ok..." he said cutting you off.

"You're such an idiot." You say laughing. He looked over at you confused, and you suddenly felt the courage to tell him. "Of course I want you to come with me. I just know it's not easy for you, especially if we are pictured together."

He looked across at you. "It'll be fine if we are in a group, I'll just have to make sure I keep my hands to myself and don't kiss you too much." He said with a smirk.

"Just have to do lots of it before we leave." You say smirking at him.

"Oh yeah?" He asks with a smirk back and his eyebrows raised.

"Yeah." You replied as you placed your empty plate on the coffee table and stood up. He looked up, wondering what you were up to. You took his now empty plate from him and removed the blanket, before straddling his thighs.

"Wanna start now?" You ask him.

"God yes." He replied as his hands landed on your thighs, giving them a squeeze. His hands soon started wandering up your thin cotton pj shorts, his thumb wandering over your centre. You gave him a cheeky smile and he returned it with the same. "You are so beautiful Erin, can't believe how lucky I am."

You could feel the blush rise on your cheeks. "Love the way you blush like that when I compliment you." He whispered, as he reached up his hands, and ran his fingers across your pink cheeks. You gave him a nervous smile.

You had never in your life been complimented as much as you had with Niall. He was always saying things like this to you, or like in the shower this morning, he gazed at you not saying anything but the looks he gave you made your heart ache for him.

You had to keep reminding yourself to not fall too hard for him, but you were worried deep down you already had.

"Erin...." he whispered as he continued stroking your cheeks. You quickly snapped out of your thoughts. "What are you thinking? I can see your brain going crazy in there." He chuckled.

"Nothing." You replied biting your lip.

"Tell me?" He said his hands cupping your face now.

"Its nothing." You say, knowing your blushing cheeks have given you away.

"Can't be nothing if its making you look away like that." He said.

You looked at him now, really looked at him. His cheeks were a bit flushed themselves and you knew it was because he was turned on right now. You could feel his erection beneath you, since you were still straddling his thighs. You loved the effect you had on him, loved how by simply sitting on his lap like this, he was instantly turned on.

Should you be honest with him? The feelings you had right now for him were sending you crazy. You thought back to earlier when you were cuddled up to him, how falling asleep in his arms had felt so good, so comfortable.

"It's honestly nothing, I was just thinking how good this feels, you being here with me. ............too good to be true actually." You mumbled hoping he hadn't heard the last bit.

He shifted and sat himself more upright so that he could wrap one of his arms around your waist. He brought his other arm up and gently swept away a lock of your hair from your face, before stroking his fingers across your cheek again.

"I'm falling for you too Erin, and I don't want to stop." He whispered as he leaned in and kissed you.

Fuck.

Your lips moulded to his, and his hand was in your hair deepening the kiss. A soft moan escaped your lips as he moved his hips slightly and his erection brushed across your already sensitive clit.

You both moved your tongues to reach each other as the same time, both desperate to taste the other. Your hands that had been resting on his shoulders moved up and you wrapped your arms around him and stroked the nape of his neck. Both of you parted at the same time, panting as you rested your heads against each other.

His eyes searched yours, and you knew he was trying to decide if he had guessed your thoughts right. You gave him a smile and bit down on your bottom lip. Before you could even process what was happening he had pulled your legs tight around him and stood up, carrying you towards your bedroom.

You'd taken your time undressing each other, and he'd looked down at your body laying naked on your bed. He shook head and mumbled "so fucking lucky" before resting himself between your legs and kissing you again.

You stayed in bed making love for the next two hours, before falling asleep in each others arms again. You woke up and noticed the sun was setting. It must be around 4pm, you weren't meeting your brother till 8pm. You untangled yourself from a still sleeping Niall and went to get a drink, before sitting down on the sofa and picking up your phone.

Michelle had text. Great.

"Are you avoiding me? I haven't seen you for like two weeks and I called by yours today."

"Hey, of course not, it's just been a busy Xmas. I've been at my parents and working alot. Was out shopping today and didn't see your call."

This was not actually all a lie, you had been busy. You'd had a certain Irishman semi naked in your flat for the past four days.

"Oh ok then, do you have plans for tonight still? I'm having that party if you want to come to?"

"Yeah, I'm still out with Ross and Amy tonight. Maybe catch up this Friday at The Courtyard?"

You had no intention of going to her party when she'd asked you a month ago, luckily Ross had already mentioned the pub. You did feel bad about trying to distance yourself from her, but you knew you couldn't have a close friendship with her anymore.

It had nothing to do with Niall though. Since you'd moved into your own flat 5 months ago you'd only seen her every couple of weeks. You'd gotten closer to Kathy at work, and a couple of the other girls you worked with. Plus with Ross and Amy living nearby you often caught up with them and their friends, who had taken you under their wing and you'd joined their group.

It wasn't like you were a loner with no friends, as Michelle had once called you. It's just you couldn't be bothered to deal with the drama that came with trying to keep so many friends happy. In Michelle's friendship group there was at least 12 of you, and someone was always bitching about being left out and to be honest, you couldn't be arsed to deal with it. They acted like teenage girls rather than women in their mid twenties.

Even the lads of the group had stopped inviting you all out as it was always a drama. You just wanted a pint in The Courtyard on a Friday night, you didn't want to watch Michelle be slutty in some dingy club that she liked to go to.

"Friday sounds good."

"See you then." You replied.

You quickly opened a new message and started to text Ross, when a sleepy and half naked Niall walked into the living room.

"Hey sleepy head." You smiled before continuing your text.

"Hey you." He replied before getting a bottle of water from the fridge. "Needed that nap, you wore me out." He smirked.

"Well, you're completely insatiable Ni." You said smirking back and placing your phone on the coffee table.

You looked over and gave him a wink.

"Think it was you who started it actually, straddling my legs like that."

Yeah it was totally you who'd started it, but you just shrugged your shoulders and smiled at him.

"What time are we going out?" He asked.

"Meeting them about 8." You replied as you stood up and wandered towards him. "Was just texting Ross to confirm."

Niall nodded. "I am going to go back to mine and get some more clothes and stuff. Is that ok?"

"Yeah of course it is. You know I want you here with me whilst we are both free. But I don't want you to feel you have to stay here though."

"I want to be here with you." He replied and he pulled your arms up to wrap around his neck. His hands fell to your bum, the t shirt you were wearing had ridden up as you'd raised your arms up. He stroked across your bum and he let out a moan.

"See totally insatiable!" You smiled as you leaned down and kissed him.

"Well, stop looking so fucking sexy all the time then." He whispered against your lips.

"Sorry!" You laughed and you heard your phone beep. "Oh Michelle text while we were asleep."

"Oh, was she pissed you didn't answer her earlier?" He asked as he released you from his embrace and let you go get your phone off the table.

"Yeah, but I lied, and said I was busy. Left out the bit about being busy being naked with you, obviously." You smirked and he laughed.

"Plans still the same, meeting at 8 at The Falcon." You said, reading the text you had just received from Ross.

"Did you tell him you're bringing me?" He asked.

"No I didn't actually." You replied as you picked up your phone and replied to Ross.

He replied straight away and you laughed. "What?" Niall said.

"He's asking if you're my pretend date?! Like an imaginary friend. Cheeky Shit!"

"Don't think imaginary dates can make you moan the way I can." He chuckled.

"Oi!" You said as you walked back over to him and gave his arm a gentle punch.

"Oh don't be all shy now!" He said as he wrapped his arms around you and kissed you again.

Thanks for reading!

Tag list @awomanindeniall

Please let me know if you would like to added to a tag list.

[likeshipsonthesea]

Hello! I really love your writing and was wondering what your creative process looks like? I'm trying to get in the habit of writing a little everyday, trying to be a lil' more disciplined with my time and efforts but it's, y'know, hard! Anyway, I was just curious because I'm always so impressed with you as a writer!

Oh wow this is such a wonderful message! I wish you luck in your journey to be a more disciplined writer but man, my deepest apologies, I am not one of those people.

Writing for me, a lot of the time, is me working through my own emotions via ridiculous hockey boys. My ficlets in particular are a lot of me feeling an emotion at 1 in the morning and getting that out through Nursey and Dex. Working in smaller contexts, like a singular scene as most of my ficlets are, helps me condense what I want to express, and it’s something of a writing exercise as well as a way to vent.

When my writing is not that, though, it’s usually me just really wanting to read a certain story until I have to write it myself. Most of my longer fics and original fiction fall into this category, though a healthy mix of both is good for most writing.

The process of doing this is messy, long, and as my expansive WIP folder can attest to, usually does not end with a finished fic. Still, if you want to know what I do when writing a longer fic, I’ll put the whole thing below the cut.

My creative process tends to be thinking of an idea– usually a “what if” like what would happen if Dex was secretly a stripper or what would happen if Nursey worked with the theater department when he had the cast in his junior year (and what if Dex was already working there???), which are both AUs currently in my WIPs folder. If it’s not an idea for a story, it’s usually an emotion thing I want to play with– Bitty and Dex having a close relationship, maybe, like what I did in love made visible, or writing out Nursey’s ~emotional~ journey at Samwell, which is another WIP I have.

After the initial idea, I’ll either think about it a whole lot for like 24 hours until I can get to a Word document or, if I already have access to one, I’ll just start writing. Usually these are my most densely packed writing days, as when I’m excited about a story I write nonstop. Depending on the intensity of my excitement, I’ll write anywhere from six pages to thirty, and eventually peter out as I get out the initial idea.

Recently, that’s been where I start to plan out what I want the story to be emotionally. I’ve been trying recently to have my fics (and stories in general) have an emotional point, have my characters learn something or grow as a by-product of the story. This tends to change the more I write, but keeping in mind what I want the characters to be feeling and where I want them to go helps keep me focused when I get held up or distracted by ridiculous hockey boys.

As far as the timeline of how I write things, well…

Sometimes I write a whole lot in one week, like what happened with Forever Stained, and somehow reach a conclusion, but more often than not I will write a bunch for a week or two, peter out, and then stop writing for a few weeks or months even. With most stories, I try not to push myself to write if I’m not feeling inspired, as I think that my writing doesn’t turn out well under that kind of constraint.

I tend to come back to my stories after a long time and reread what I’ve written and, if I like it, I’ll get inspired to finish it. If I don’t like it at all, I’ll throw it in my abandoned folder, and if I like the idea but not the writing it goes into my rewrite folder. So, really, it all depends on how well I write the first time around whether or not the fic gets finished.

When I am inspired to write a fic, my writing/creative process is more consistent. What I’ve been doing with my recent kid fic, for example, is that I’ll write out as much as I can one night and the next day I go back to where the new stuff has been written and reread, editing as I go. Usually, if things work out, by the time I get back to where I left off, I’m excited/inspired to write the next bits. If not, sometimes that means reworking what I wrote the day before or taking a break until the inspiration hits.

After a lot of the above and frequent breaks, I reach the ending, which I have historically had a lot of trouble with. I tend to rush endings for a variety of reasons, which is why when I reread my AO3 fics I tend to stop before the last chapter. I’ve been trying to amend this recently but I don’t know if I’ve combated it successfully yet. Again, trying to keep in mind the arc/goal of the story helps keep me focused.

Editing is usually pretty easy for me, as I can identify where I get bored/annoyed with an alarming accuracy, but recently I have had the help of some wonderful betas who, I think, have been making me better writers. I went a long time without showing anyone my writing outside of a fic context, where criticism wasn’t asked for, and while it kept me secure and shit, I didn’t exactly improve. So, betas are a big help.

Now if you’ve made it all the way here, I can’t really tell if you’ve gleaned anything from my rambling. But if I had to summarize, my advice for writing is that, while you need practice to get better, I think forcing yourself to write can be somewhat counterproductive. So much of writing (imo) is tied to your emotion and inspiration as a writer and if you have to force yourself to write, I think it shows in the final result.

Try your best to have fun with it, because it is supposed to be fun, I think. If you want to write more and don’t have inspiration, try finding whacky drawings or weird one-liners and try to write something for that. Let people read it and give constructive criticism, but yeah, most of all have fun :)

[mandareeboo]

Unfinished Work #24: “Opposite Axes”

Wellll this is less ‘unfinished’ as it is ‘I’mma have to rework the SHIT out of this bc of the special and I can’t NOT put my beautiful Sunstone and co in there somewhere’ so I’mma probably scrap this part of my third in line of the Steven and Fam Fusion Musical Show and redo from step one.

Title: Opposite Axes

"Absolutely not. There's growth and then there's insanity."

"Oh, let's give it a chance, Yellow," Blue pleaded, one hand cupped over her mouth thoughtfully. "Steven's already brought us so many interesting proposals. What's wrong with this one?"

"Interesting?" Yellow repeated dubiously. "Era 3 has been a massive failure so far. Production has gone down by over forty percent!"

"Yes, but they're so much happier."

"They won't be happier when we have no more planet to live on!"

Steven's ears were ringing as the Diamonds' voices began to lift. He puckered his lips and whistled. "Look, I know I'm no good at stats like Pearl is- who, by the way, really wanted to do this presentation, and the fact that you won't even let her in the room is extremely rude-"

"Do you know how undignified it'd be if we-"

"But," he plowed over her. "This will expand production enough to make up for lost time. Pearls are far less destructive to create, and they can be beneficial in so many fields! Just imagine how many happy faces with pointy noses we could make!"

Yellow sighed and pinched the junction of her nose. "It concerns me that we've come to a point where this is making sense," she said wearily. "Listen, Steven. Having an Era 3 Pearl being made without typical refineries and allowed to run wild can cause a lot of trouble for all of us. Especially compared to the older models. We could face a full-on revolution."

"It'd kind of be one we'd deserve, don't you think?"

"Perhaps. But you know as well as I do that there are many Era 1 and 2 Gems who would still leap at the chance to be shattered to protect us. We'd be causing dustshed all across Homeworld."

"I wonder," Blue said, "What an unrefined Pearl would look like?"

"It doesn't matter what they look like," Steven stressed. "What matters is that this is the safest option- for us and for the rest of the galaxy."

"How do you know what's safe or what isn't?" Yellow challenged. "I understand that you were raised with different values, but you can't force change overnight and expect it to right everything."

"I've been working with Homeworld for three years!"

"Three years?" The Diamond stood up, running her fingers through her hair. "Stars help us, it's only been three years. How did we manage to go from galactic superpower to galactic embarrassment in three years?"

Blue took her arm. "Perhaps we should adjourn for now."

"That might be for the best," she reluctantly agreed. Yellow clapped her hands. "That will be all, Steven."

Steven saluted the typical Earth salute, turning away. Frustration bubbled just below the surface, but yelling at Yellow and Blue rarely seemed to do much good. It usually just made it all drag out more.

"He's so different from her," he overheard Blue murmur on the way out. "Yellow, what if he never remembers being Pink?"

Yellow's eyes fluttered shut. "I'm not willing to consider that option, Blue."

Overall, Steven spent the least amount of time on Homeworld as physically possible. As important as maintaining connections was, especially as the fully realized Ambassador of Earth (and, as some Gems felt the need to tack on, Keeper of a Diamond's Stone), there was something about the hard planes and structures that had never quite sat right with him. Unfortunately, Steven couldn't stay away very much anymore, seeing how pivotal his voice was for Era 3.

It had been two weeks since he'd stopped by the beach house, and it was of very little surprise to him that no one else was around when he warped inside- save for Bismuth, of course, who even after almost half a decade of peace refused to even contemplate returning to Homeworld. She tended to the house while they were away, drawing up plans and designs for various Gem machines designed more for safety and protection than war. Not that her impressive sword collection ever had the slightest chance to grow dusty, as she built and sculpted them in her free time.

"Hey," she said, sequestering over half the couch with her size. "How'd it go?"

Steven groaned. "Politics are horrible."

"Yellow being a butthead again?"

He flopped down beside her. "I get why she does it. I do. She asks the questions, I answer, nobody can pull them out later and blindside us. But does she have to be so mean about it?"

"Sounds rough, buddy." Bismuth leaned over to nudge his shoulder. "Hit me up if you ever get sick of hurdles, alright? I'll make you something nice and sharp."

Steven smiled. Homeworld seemed like it was constantly moving in some way or another- hustle and bustle, destruction and construction, who White Diamond was not pleased with that particular day- but the Gems themselves didn't change. He hadn't changed. "Thanks, Bismuth."

He doesn't recall falling asleep.

Connie's official title was Protector of the Ambassador- which is overtly long and means almost nothing to anyone; but, in Homeworld's defense, the Gems have always gone by their type. They've never needed official titles before the Crystal Gems brought them home with them- but most of them just referred to her as The Connie. At thirteen, that had bothered her greatly. At sixteen, she hardly even noticed.

But a lot had changed in three simple years. Connie had nearly tripled in height, finding herself at the same height as Pearl. Her arms and face held a scattering of scars from various violent exchanges as debates had gone on- scars that Steven could have healed up, of course, but Connie had demanded they stay, noticing that the discolorations intimidated Gems. Maybe they were reminded of Jaspers when they saw the scratch that went from her lip and over her eye, or the deep line on her shoulder she had tattooed over with a single star- and, if so, they'd have every right to be frightened. Her sword, made by Bismuth, was swirled with pink and white like a Cookie Cat, tapered to her specific height, and hung carefully from her hip.

Another sign of change was the Gems who met her at the door- not Agates, but an Amethyst and a Ruby, who gave her a respectful salute and sheepish smiles. Connie saluted them back with the signature diamond shape before going inside.

"Diamonds," she greeted, not particularly worried by how they both snapped to attention as she strolled into the room. Connie felt bad for interrupting whatever private moment they'd been sharing, but duty is duty. "I just wanted to stop by and tell you Steven's gone back to Earth for a visit."

"Of course," Yellow said, bitter, as she rubbed at her eyelids. "Make a big speech before vanishing off the planet to goof around with his rebel friends. That's so typical."

"He wants us to bring Pearls into the workforce," Blue explained, as if Connie didn't already know.

"I'm aware, ma'am."

"You were trained by one, correct? What do you think of all of this?"

"I give the proposition my full support, ma'am," Connie said firmly. "No one has the right to tell anyone what they should be, and that's what Homeworld's done for centuries now. If you really wanna change, you have to go all the way."

"Where does that put us, then?" Yellow challenged. "Diamonds are created to rule. If we break all the barriers, what happens to our system?"

"No one ever said it wasn't going to be messy, ma'am."

Yellow seemed to sink under the weight of that statement. For once, it's Blue who says that's all. Connie saluted again and walked back out, wondering with a shake of her head if there had ever been a point to any of this.

Lion seems to enjoy hopping between her and Steven, taking random Ruby ships from Homeworld to Earth and back. Today he's waiting for her outside the palace, eager to get back to what could technically be called an apartment, if apartments didn't require rent or have basic plumbing. In it's own right, it's an honor they even built a room semi-suitable to human cohabitation in the first place for them. It was just a shame that they had such limited knowledge.

The apartment is a perfectly set rectangle in the wall of one of Homeworld's many spires. It's an ugly, washed out shade of blue- like the ocean but ten times less beautiful- and contains exactly one lump that she expected was supposed to be a bed or couch or both. Her parents had insisted on getting her a comfy armchair, which was a brown smudge in the corner. The cherry on top of the horrifyingly ugly color-nightmare was Captain Lars, snoring in said ugly brown chair, in said ugly blue room, his pastel pink skin glaring.

"Back from shipment?" she asked, dismounting Lion.

"Hmm?" Lars tipped his head back, reluctantly opening his eyes. "Oh. Hey. Yeah, I'm back."

"You sound ever so pleased about that."

"I'm bored. Whatever happened to cool boss fights and daring space chases?" He flicked his cape over his shoulder dramatically. "Now I just haul cargo. You're basically a door-holder, and Steven spends his days telling giant Diamonds that maybe people should be allowed to actually think for themselves."

"The cool boss fights and space chases didn't do as much as we hoped, I guess." Connie shrugged, setting her sword aside. "It just kind of evolved into this."

"Hey, I got my buddies to Earth just fine."

"I know, and it was awesome." A giggle erupted from her, remembering her involvement fondly. "They still tell stories about you in the public octagon. Especially the Emeralds."

Lars clicked his tongue and shot some finger guns her way.

[amorentia-quibble]

Smoke, Screens and Other Illusions - A (Messy) Rundown

This is gonna be long, convoluted and will run off on so many different tangents you won’t even remember what this post was about in the first place. YALL READY?

Good cus I’m not XD

Before I get into this all, I will let you guys know that I got up to 30,000 words! It’s not the 50,000 I had hoped, but factoring in work, school and directing a small play with less than compliant children, it wasn’t a shabby effort. I was going to have a break before returning to the editing process, but my lovely old friend, and former editor for the local paper, has hooked me up with a newly published author who’s interested in looking at my work and giving me pointers. Which is super exciting!! But I have to get in quick as she’s living between here and the UK, and she wants to meet in person to talk. So, I need to finish writing and polish my mess of a manuscript before then. I don’t have a date yet, but I want to just get it done asap. Hence why I’m talking here! Getting ideas down and out into the world, whether for critique or just for others to see i have been doing things this month!

Alrighty, back into it. The first thing you guys might notice is the big title change, if you’ve been following my NaNo process. What once was Praese is now Smoke, Screens and Other Illusions, or SSOI, as I’ve been abbreviating it to. Praese just didn’t have enough of a link to the story for me to use it, and it’s got really awkward pronunciation. Is it Praise? Praeese? Pras? I don’t know, and if I dunno then no one will XD SSOI was actually the title of the little oneshot book I planned for this book AGES ago, way before NaNo and this story was considered novel-worthy, and I just sort of latched onto it while on the hunt for better title names. If anyone’s interested, I have a good list of the potential titles I had planned, but none stuck like this one for me.

Now, onto the actual story!!

A lot changed over the course of last month, particularly the outlined plot. Because of lack of time, thanks to school, and because I was still very, very new to the concept of writing a novel in a month, my plot outline was... Well, flimsy wouldn’t begin to explain it. I had a vague idea of where things should sort of be after a while, then which character should maybe turn up after that... And then the ending and the beginning were pretty set.

At first.

As I went, things weren’t adding up for me, I was finding the characters I’d made weren’t fitting into the world I was creating and the plot was running away into something I loved, but not something I’d planned for. Characters like Veda were reworked to change how she fits into the plot, villains altered and recreated, conflicts changed, and with that, some characters are sitting on the chopping room floor. That’s not to say I wont find ways to fit them in, since I still haven’t finished the novel. Being only 30,000 words in, and with a fair amount of those also easily able to be culled as I had this really annoying epiphany in the middle of writing, I’ve got plenty of work to do. 

Two characters I really, really want to somehow work back in are Zahara and Phoebe. Zahara was supposed to be my homage to my little brother, and to children with Autism and display that, make it more normal. It was something that worked in the old story, but I’m struggling to find where it would fit now. I considered making her an adult, but it doesn’t feel right. Especially considering her living on another continent, something that was fine in the first plot, is now a major barrier that I can’t really change for this new plot. I’ve considered scrapping her all together for this story and making an entirely new one for her, but she feels like she has a home here in this one, just... Buried away. Phoebe’s another one who had a major part in the plot before it changed, and not only did I find her Quirk cool as fuck, her interactions with the characters were very unique and, I thought at least, important to their development. It was just very hard to find a way to fit her in with how the story evolved. But, with the pacing issues I know I’m having right now, I may find a way. It’s all a matter of tweaking, and a lot of rewriting.

A character who really appeared out of nowhere, and is the whole reason I found this new plot, was Manuel Lavien (Damn you Lavien!). I really, really can’t say much about him because of his importance to the plot, but he is the Governor for Environmental Affairs for Osmayee on The World Institute of Governing. Long title, right? Yeah, he uses that to his full potential, if you can’t remember it now, you’ll remember it by the time you finish reading the novel (in its current form, at least).  What I can say that’s not really a huge spoiler is that he is the key to everything our main gals, Mora and London, need, but he’s kidnapped and framed to have tried to create artificial natural disasters. A lot spirals off from there, and boy do I love him as a character, but damn it man, you couldn’t have given me all these plot ideas before I got 9,000 words of worthless stuff down??

What is fun about this story, that I wanted in it, but didn’t know how it would work until this new plot came to me, was the higher stakes. At first the plot was sort of just a travel across continents, chasing this mystery man and get him to help, but I quickly realised my fatal flaw when I planned on him being a government official. How would they not know where he is at all times, not know what he looks like until their first meeting? He’s high-profile! And Mora’s this detective person, it’s too easy for her to look these things up! So he was just kidnapped instead, and it starts this whole chase and more action, and presents situations for my characters I wasn’t expecting. It’s fun and I’m glad that’s what came about because of the change. What was once a weird mishmash of genres between action, romance, mystery, horror, fluff, i dunno every genre ever really, is now far more narrowed into an action-packed mystery. It has its subplots, but it’s also more focused, and that’s absolutely what I needed.

At the moment, with how much of a mess this manuscript is (seriously it’s horrible, I’m terrified of having to read through this thing.) I don’t know where i’m gonna be at with it in the near future, just that it’s... a lot. I know I said I’d update a lot last month, and really, really didn’t, but I will try updating more on where I’m at. 

Until then, I hope you guys weren’t bored to death by my rambling (with very little point, might i add, but it helped me out a bit, at least) and I hope you enjoy the few lil artpieces imma just throw up after this post lol

Thank you!! 

[blenderknight]

Still Alive, here’s some images and lots of text

Hi guys, I just wanted to say I’m not dead, I’m just doing the boring parts I need in place for the upcoming animations. Also I’m trying to focus on school a bit more. 

I’ll answer your asks in a bit, but first, here’s an update:

Right now I’m working on the Kanker sisters’ room. It basically looks like it did in the show, just less pink and less messy

In the show, their whole room is a solid pink, which I toned down since I don’t think pink suits them that much. Kept the pink bed sheets though. And did you guys notice that they actually have two mirrors opposite of each other in the show? Could make for some interesting shots. The room is maybe half finished, I need to sprinkle a little mess around the room, fix the materials, and polish.  

I’ve also completely redone both Lee and Marie’s hair. In all these comparison images, the newest model is to the left, oldest is to the right. Here’s Lee: 

You can see a little hint of her eyes in the new one. The old one used my HD-ified version of the original textures, but for this new one I just completely remade both textures and mesh. I’m doing that with all the other meshes too. Throwing away all the Fusionfall assets, that was a failed project I never should have used any of their textures or meshes. 

This is actually two haircuts in one!  A little trivia about the old model: under all those curls, there’s what seems to be a short, cute little haircut.

I thought it was a cool little detail, so I kept that when I remade her hair. I didn’t include her face here, because I’m really happy with her eyes and I want her face reveal to be a little more special.

Here’s Marie:

Marie’s hair actually went through two iterations of remakes. First one (the one in the middle) was a fairly faithful remake of her original haircut, second one had a bit more personality. I want the girls to look a bit more grown up, so I feel their hair should look like it has more thought put into it. 

You might notice she’s got earrings too, since I’m also working on remaking their clothes and accessories. Here’s what their new clothes look like: 

Since I’m remaking everything from scratch, I thought I’d change their outfits. I think the high heels may look a little slutty, but at the same time I feel like that fits her character. 

On to Lee: 

Polka dots are weird, I was thinking of dropping her polka dots all together. Maybe for my next rendition of the Kankers. Thinking of making a milf series of them later. 

I’m not including May here, since so far I’ve only remade her textures. Maybe I’ll edit in an image of her when I’m done. 

If you want to see how their clothes looked before, you can look at this (NSFW) post. 

Other than that, when it comes to the Kankers, I’ve just been tweaking their shapekeys, reworking textures, I remade their teeth, remade their rigs, bla bla. Not very exciting stuff, but still pretty important. 

I mentioned a while ago that I made a male model that I haven’t shown you yet. I haven’t worked any more on him but I think I will soon. I’ll make a separate post for him. 

Also, I’m working on a new girl, or, woman rather. I don’t know if I want to show her to you yet since she has literally no textures, but maybe you can guess who it is based on these

[defender-of-mankind]

Assignment 1: Rube Goldberg Machine

Friday, May 31st

1:30pm

Alrighty so we just sat down and opened Unity and I’m just gonna jump into this project. My plan is to get familiar with the software a little bit since I don’t know Unity…like, at all. There’s gonna be a lot of failures and frustration but we’re gonna make it work.

Once I have the most basic handle on how to make things fall and roll, then I’ll start throwing together a design and then put it all together in the program.

I’m coming into this assignment with no knowledge of the software, the coding language, the physics, or the controls, so let’s get going.

2:30pm

So, one hour later and things are moving! One thing, actually. I made a ball roll.

Needless to say, I’ve been struggling. Full on the struggle bus with this one.

The biggest problem I kept running into is that I don’t know Unity, so the first hour of this project was just me constantly trying to run the game to see if something would change and it would magically work because I didn’t even know where to start.

Google has been my best friend and I have, like, 25 tabs open right now.

I feel like an explanation of what I had to go through during this part wouldn’t do the process justice, so, here’s a list of some of the things I Googled while trying to figure out how to make this machine:

how to add objects in unity

unity ball asset download

unity ball asset download free

how to make a ball roll down a hill in unity

ball not falling in unity

why won’t objects move in unity

what is a rigid body in unity

how to add a rigid body to a ball in unity

ball going through objects in unity

how to add colliders in unity

why aren’t colliders working in unity

After frustration and countless test runs, I finally figured it out. Not only do you need a rigid body on the object that is falling, but both objects also need to have colliders and all colliders and rigid bodies need to be of the same dimension, meaning you can’t have a 2D rigid body and a 3D collider on the same object.

Also, I made my design. It’s got a lot going on and I’m thinking I might have to download some 3D files online for the parts that aren’t basic shapes like spheres and cubes. I’m really excited about the funnel part of it. I wanted it to be like one of those funnels that you see in museums for donations where you can slide a coin down it and it circles its way down to the bottom, and hopefully the ball will be able to do the same thing. I also have a catapult in there, not sure if that’s gonna work because I’m definitely gonna need to find a 3D model (or make it) but it needs to have a spring-loaded action in order to make the ball catapult since I can’t click it to activate it or anything. Maybe I’ll get lucky and find one that works, who knows.

I’m moving on now to the rest of the build, hopefully, we won’t have any more issues….

6:00pm

Well…we ran into more issues.

My original design was made with no knowledge of the capabilities that Unity has involving collisions and rigid bodies, so after my brief, self-taught crash course on the basics, I felt that I had a good handle on how and why we need collisions and thought the rest of the process would go fairly smooth.

Boy was I wrong.

I thought the funnel was going to be easy enough, just add another collision and it would just work, but I didn’t realize that since it’s such an irregular shape, you need specific kind of collisions otherwise the ball just goes right through. The problem is, that kind of collision is considered a 3D collision, not a 2D collision.

Since I had used 2D collisions for all of my blocks and the balls, I wasn’t able to make the irregularly shaped funnel collide with the ball, since you can’t mix 2D and 3D collisions and I needed to add a mesh collision to the funnel because it’s a complex and irregular shape, which is a 3D collision. So, in my efforts to make this work, I changed all of my collisions to 3D collisions. 

The issue with this was that I had adjusted the gravity for one of the blocks that fell and slingshotted another ball into the funnel thing, but with 3D collisions and 3D rigid bodies, you can’t adjust the gravity in the same way as you can the 2D ones without scripts which I don’t know how to use. 

So I ended up changing all the collisions back to 2D collisions because I read somewhere that there is a 2D collision option for irregular shapes, the polygon collision tool, so I thought that would make it work the way I wanted it to with the gravity change and everything, but it didn't go too well...

I think this tool could definitely be really helpful in situations like this or when you just need a collision on part of an object and you want it to be more accurate than just the box colliders, but I was just having so much trouble grasping how to make it do what I wanted it to, so I tried to rework my whole design in order to have the slower falling block (since I can’t change gravity, bummer) bump a ramp that would send the ball rolling into the funnel, but the ball ended up rolling too slowly and just went straight down the funnel instead of swirling the way I wanted it to, so after all the work of changing the collisions and rigid bodies, I was still stuck.

I think I might have to ditch the funnel idea, which is unfortunate because it would’ve been so cool if it actually worked the way I wanted it to but without the scripts to help it move the way I want it to, I don’t think it’s gonna look good. I also realized that the 3D collisions are more limiting than the 2D collisions, so I want to keep using the 2D collisions in hopes that some of the later stuff in my design will work the way I want it to.

I might change the funnel into something like a basketball hoop just to make the transition to the next part more interesting and try to keep the same idea that I was going for, but I’ll probably have to rework everything again because I know the catapult is not going to work the way I want it to, mostly because I can’t find an asset anywhere that has something like a spring-loaded catapult that doesn’t require scripts, so I’ll save that for another day.

Saturday, June 1st

10:00am

Alrighty, we’re back at it after last night. I got distracted with dinner and decided it was better to sleep on it than getting more frustrated trying to figure out my design. I did more research about collisions and trying to get a mesh collision to work with 2D collisions, but it seems like that’s just not something the software can do. I am still kind of sad that I couldn’t find a way to make the funnel work the way I wanted it to, and the catapult is definitely not going to work either because of the intricacies of the program that I didn’t know when I first designed it. Basically, I wanted the machine to catapult one of the balls through some hoops that would set off the next chain reaction, but that’s been taken out now.

Hopefully, this will end up working better. I’m still trying to keep the same kind of elements in order to get to the end goal and not make it super boring, but for now, I’m going to finish what I can and we’ll check in when I get stuck again (because we all know I’m definitely gonna get stuck again at some point.)

12:00pm

I lied! No more stucks!

I finished the final design that I had with minimal changes and it actually works!! I’m still kind of upset that I had to change some parts of it like the funnel, and the basketball hoop idea turned into a tube but that didn’t work either because I ran into the same issue with needing collisions but the ball wouldn’t interact with the tube the way I wanted to unless I used 3D collisions, so I changed it to this ramp down/step idea thing. And then the other part that didn’t work was the catapult and since my design needed a way for the reaction to get higher than it already was, I placed some dominos up a staircase and that finished the machine!

To be completely honest, I wish that there was more to it, so I’ll probably end up adding more, but I saved the file as is so I have that as a back up if something goes wrong. I really like the way I did then end because in a lot of Rube Goldberg Machines, it kind of just “ends” but I had it end by giving the last block a purpose: to finish the tower. I’m really happy with the way this turned out and I learned so much in the process about basic physics in the game and what needs to be applied in order to make that happen.

One part that I’m particularly proud of is the tiltey ramp thing close to the end where the block falls and makes the ball roll down from the other side. I first tried making that just with normal cubes in Unity, but quickly discovered that with the rigid bodies and collisions that I needed that the whole thing fell apart as soon as I ran the simulation, so I decided to design it myself. I used Shapr3D which is an iPad app that is just the best 3D modeling software I have ever used. It’s way more hands-on than just a mouse and keyboard because I actually get to track around the object and design it with my pencil and hands. In my opinion, it makes designing so much easier. So I’m really happy with the way that one turned out.

I’ll probably end up fixing the middle section where the ball falls down the little ramps because I think it looks kind of messy and it could be a much more interesting section, since it was originally supposed to be the funnel/basketball hoop idea, but overall I’m super proud of myself with how far I’ve come using this software in just under a day, and I can’t wait to see what I’ll be capable of by the end of the course.

Monday, June 3rd

1:45pm

RED FREAKING ALERT!!! I SCREWED EVERYTHING UP!

I was talking to one of my friends who knows Unity well and asking how to export the package and when it all came up I realized there were a lot of assets that were in the package that I didn’t use, so in my effort to clean everything up a little bit, I started deleting asset packages that I didn’t use.

OR SO I THOUGHT!

I accidentally deleted all of the platforms and ramps from the WHOLE THING because I didn’t realize that the asset was in one of the packages that I deleted. I tried to troubleshoot and get the package back, but I totally ignored the warning that once you delete a package it can’t be undone.

So long story short, I had to remake the ENTIRE PROJECT from scratch. rip.

It went pretty quickly and only took me about 2 hours to redo the whole thing and it actually gave me time to rethink some of the designs and potentially add some more components. I ended up keeping most of what I already had but I changed the end a little bit to make it a tad more exciting. I also increased the gravity on all moving objects to make them fall a little quicker because my parents said it was a little slow to watch. I also added one massive feature to the end that I quite enjoy. It serves little purpose other than to give me a chuckle, but still. (I had to put the video in a separate post)

So, now I think I’m actually done and I learned my lesson to only upload the asset packages I need to the project and to NOT DELETE ANY OF THEM EVER.

This process took me over 8 hours of working time to fully complete, but I learned a lot and made a lot of mistakes that I know not to make next time. While I was so frustrated that I completely deleted most of my project, it actually showed me how much I’ve improved just in the few days I’ve been working on this project and how I can be much more efficient and work faster now that I (kind of) know what I’m doing.

Below is the Google Drive link to the Unity Package:

https://drive.google.com/file/d/1GuA92kmZMyIdXKUJx5-FQTk_MYUpXr3E/view?usp=sharing