#maybe i'll write it in more detail later but i needed it out now
Explore tagged Tumblr posts
babygirlsteddie ¡ 2 years ago
Text
i've been having a lot of thoughts about old retired steve who lives in new york because that's where a few of the kids ended up and he wanted to be close to them. old retired steve who gets up each morning and gets his latte from his favorite coffee shop where the baristas all know him by name. he walks to his favorite bench in central park and sits there for an hour each morning, sometimes reading a book, sometimes just people watching.
old retired steve who is joined one day by a younger man who says he's compiling people's love stories, and would love to hear steve's. steve, who in his old age has thrown caution to the wind, tells this young man about eddie.
eddie, the only person steve has ever truly loved. eddie, who died in his arms. he's vague about it, still mindful of the NDAs he's still signing every 10 years, but he spills out all the words and he's not even sure if he's told robin everything he's telling this stranger on a tuesday morning, sitting on a bench in central park.
steve pulls out his wallet and presents the stranger with a polaroid, cracked with age but still cherished, a grinning eddie munson pictured clearly. there are tears in steve's eyes as he talks about eddie, about the short time they knew each other. steve would have counted himself lucky if he only had three minutes with eddie.
steve doesn't make it out to be a sob story. there's been enough grief to last his lifetime and more. he tells the stranger about his and eddie's love, then continues. tells the stranger that he's still surrounded with love, from his mismatched family, full of brothers and sisters and not-so-little kids who call him uncle steve. he finds love every morning from the barista who makes his coffee, from his neighbors dog. he finds love in his dreams where he's 19 again, with eddie by his side.
it's a few weeks later when dustin's daughter shows him the humans of new york instagram page, where steve is pictured, smiling, glancing down at an old polaroid.
4 notes ¡ View notes
nikkento-writes ¡ 4 months ago
Text
Babysitter - Part 2
Tumblr media
Pairing: dad!Toji x babysitter!reader
Rating: Explicit – MINORS DO NOT INTERACT
Word Count: ~3.8k
cw: age gap (reader is 21, Toji is in his 30s), explicit language, cheating, pregnancy, smut – PIV sex (doggy style)
Summary: You deal with the aftermath of your summer babysitting job turned adulterous summer scandal.
Author’s Notes: Thanks for all the kind words and support on Part 1 of this! I hope you enjoy part 2, and who knows, maybe I'll write a part 3 one day lol. Thanks for reading! Divider credit to @/fic-dumpster.
Taglist: @scorpiosugar @diegojeanne @f4irygard3n @cvixmei @soniiyi - more tags in the comments
Tumblr media
“You’ve got to be fucking kidding me.” You blink away the tears in your eyes, holding the pregnancy test, hoping that somehow, you’ll blink away the second line indicating that you are indeed pregnant.
“No way.” Chiyo waits for you outside the stall, the apprehension in her voice apparent.
“Yes. I’m…” There’s a lump in your throat you have to swallow before you finish your sentence. “Pregnant.”
Your best friend’s silence on the other side only makes you panic more, but you don’t blame her. What can she really say to make any of this better? To stop your world from turning upside down?
She whispers your name quietly, at a complete loss for words. Then, she clears her throat, sounding as if she’s fighting tears herself. “I’m going to buy you a melon pan. Just…wait for me here, okay?” It’s the only consolation she can offer you in this moment, huddled in a public restroom of a convenience store; you appreciate the effort, nonetheless. You wait for her to leave, completely alone now. As soon as she’s gone, you sob into your hands.
It's not that you oppose being a mother. You’ve always imagined handing a positive pregnancy test to the love of your life with the biggest smile on your face, excited to raise a family together. Ideally, this would have happened sometime in the future, once you’ve established yourself as a full-fledged adult. Not like this: twenty-one years-old, less than a year until graduation without the slightest clue what you’re doing with your life. Worst of all, the father isn’t your husband, a boyfriend, even a friend. It’s Toji Fushiguro, the dad of the little boy you babysat over the summer, the husband of the kind woman who hired you. You still haven’t forgiven yourself for your adultery, the guilt eating away at you since the start of that lecherous summer fling. And now, you have this pee-on-a-stick to remind you how incredibly reckless you were to get involved with him in the first place. How undeniably irresponsible you were to have unprotected sex with a married man. Sure, it was the best sex you’ll probably ever have in your life. But was it worth it?
You wrap the pregnancy test in toilet paper, tossing it in the trash bin. Knowing that no good will come out of sulking in the 7-11 bathroom any longer, you finally exit the stall, washing your hands clean at the sink. Your phone vibrates in your back pocket as you stare at your reflection in the mirror, fixated on your belly, wondering what it will look like round and full of life. It buzzes again, snapping you out of your trance. When you check to see who’s messaging, you almost drop your phone out of shock.
Somehow, someway, the universe has it out for you. Because in the most perfectly disastrous timing ever, Mrs. Fushiguro decides to contact you.
~~~
A week later, you’re sitting on the train, heading to the Fushiguro household. Your stomach is in knots, both from anxiety and from the morning sickness. Sweat beads on your forehead, skin sticky against your clothing in this hot weather. The closer you approach your destined stop, the more and more nervous you get, almost convinced to call the whole thing off.
Believe it or not, Mrs. Fushiguro did not contact you to confront you about the dirty deeds you did with her husband. Instead, she messaged you in dire need of a babysitter once again. She spares you the details, asking if you could meet her in person to better explain herself. And for whatever reason, you agree.
You haven’t come up with a solid plan yet on what you want to do about your little predicament. So far, the only people that know are Chiyo and your parents, who, after the initial shock of it all, have been surprisingly supportive. They advised you to take the rest of the term off, which you were able to get arranged quickly through your school. This gives you several weeks to decide what you need to do. With one issue resolved, it leaves you with the next, and the most pressing: whether or not you should tell the father. The last thing you want is to break apart the Fushiguro family. You’re fully prepared to raise this baby as a single mother, which, with the help of your parents and best friend, seems doable. Besides, you’re not even sure if you want Toji to be involved considering his complete lack of interest in his other child, Megumi. Despite that, you believe that as the father, he has the right to know. Can you gather the courage to actually tell him?
Still lost in your train of thought, you hop off to walk to the house. When you arrive, you spot Mrs. Fushiguro already outside, leaning against her car in the driveway with little Megumi in her arms. They both smile upon seeing you, warming your heart. You take a deep breath, bracing yourself for whatever is to come. 
“Hello Mrs. Fushiguro,” you greet her, bowing politely, too shy to meet her gaze. “How are you?”
“Doing really well. Thank you for coming on such short notice.” She lets her son down, who steps towards you until he’s hugging your knee, cooing. “I wanted to talk to you in person about my complicated situation.”
“Is everything alright?” you ask, unable to resist kneeling down to meet Megumi at eye level, making funny faces at him.
She giggles. “Oh, everything is great! The divorce finally went through and I’m living with my new boyfriend now, who’s been the absolute best, especially with Megumi.”
You make a shocked expression, mouth agape, exaggerated for the kid’s entertainment, though you’re pretty much stunned yourself. “Divorce…?”
“Yeah! Toji and I have been separated for a long time now. I’m sorry I didn’t mention that over the summer. You’re still so young after all, no need to rope you into adult things.”
You almost bust out laughing at the irony, but you hold your tongue, continuing to listen to her.
She sighs, flipping her long, beautiful hair behind her shoulders. “That being said, I still care about the guy. I mean, he is the father of my child. Without me or Megumi there on a regular basis, the whole house has gone to shit. It seems like he’s actually taking this divorce pretty hard. So, I want to hire you as a babysitter for my ex-husband. Just for a little while until he can get back up on his feet.”
Another shocked face, which makes Megumi laugh while dread sinks into your chest. “Babysitter…?”
“Babysitter, housekeeper, whatever you want to call it. You did such a wonderful job with him over the summer, even while you were taking care of Megumi! I don’t know what you were feeding him. Whatever it was, he was definitely a little bit nicer when you were around.”
Lewd flashbacks replay in your mind of Toji eating you out sloppily, slurping up all your pussy juices in every room of the house. You focus on the ground, too ashamed to look at her. “Mrs. Fushiguro, I don’t know if I can do this.”
She squats to your level, reaching for your hand, holding it gently in hers. “I know this is a lot of ask. You’re the only one I can rely on for this. Please.”
A sense of déjà vu hits you. There’s desperation in her tone and it tugs at your heartstrings the same way it did when you first met her a few months ago. It doesn’t help that Megumi is now squeezing the index finger of your other hand, eyes full of curious wonder, grip surprisingly strong for such a young child. Would she be pleading with you like this if she knew the truth about you, Toji, and the baby? Even though they were separated during this whole ordeal, it doesn’t make what you did any better; you still decided to do it regardless of their marital status.
Maybe you can use this opportunity as a way to atone.  
You finally look at her, giving the most convincing smile you can muster, trying your best to ignore the wave of nausea washing over you. “Okay. I’ll do it.”
~~~
Mrs. Fushiguro asks you to start at noon the following day, giving her enough time to notify her ex about your temporary employment. When you use the set of keys she gave you to open the front door, you step inside cautiously, not sure what to expect. You’ve been dreading this impromptu reunion all night, wondering if you could even face him.
It’s a mess inside, heaps of dirty laundry scattered all over the furniture, fast food wrappers and empty ramen bowls littered on the kitchen counter. There’s a stench lingering in the stale air in here and you almost think the worse, but Mrs. Fushiguro had warned you about this. Seeing it in person is more heartbreaking than disgusting. Toji really is taking this divorce hard. It wouldn’t be right to burden him with more life-changing news, right?
You begin by gathering all the trash into garbage bags, flattening any cardboard to recycle. By the looks of it, he’s been living off junk food and protein bars for the past month. The refrigerator is near empty, aside from a questionable take-out container in the very back, which you end up dumping along with everything else. You make it your next task to get groceries after you load the washing machine.
When you return from the store, Toji remains absent. Nerves prevent you from leaning against the bedroom door to listen for any signs of him in there. His ex-wife mentioned that he goes out to gamble at the horse races whenever he’s short on cash, so it’s likely he’s there. Still, you’re anticipating his return, mentally preparing yourself for how you’ll behave around him. Given your current circumstances, you are serious about turning over a new leaf. No more funny business with him. Absolutely not.
It’s near dinnertime now and you’ve miraculously accomplished tidying the house and doing his laundry all within a few hours. You even managed to cook soup for dinner, full of hearty beef and fresh vegetables, something to provide nutrients compared to the processed food he’s been consuming lately. You’re stirring the pot when you hear keys jingle from outside the front door. He comes in, clad in a tight-fitting black shirt that accentuates his muscles and grey sweatpants that don't leave much to the imagination. A plastic bag is slung behind his shoulder, clearly from a convenience store. Despite his concerning diet, his physique is still impressive as ever. Just one glance at him has you fluttering below your belly, replaying the erotic memories you share together. You turn to face him, standing up straight, feigning confidence while you fret internally. He looks at you, brow raised slightly, a small smirk forming on his lips.
“Hello sir,” you greet him, bowing politely. Acting as if he’s a total stranger and not the man who rocked your entire world over the summer, now with evidence to prove it.
He sets the bag on the counter, revealing a couple of ramen packets inside. “What’s with the formalities?” he asks, grinning. “If I remember correctly, you were screaming my name nonstop the last time you were here.”
Heat rushes into your cheeks instantly, not surprised by his vulgarity, though still embarrassed. You clear your throat, trying to stay strong. “I’m here to work. Nothing else.”
He walks towards you, his stature casting a daunting shadow as he steps closer and closer, towering over you. His voice is low, borderline threatening to a point that has you trembling. “So you don’t want me to fuck you anymore?”
You swallow hard, composure wavering. “That’s right.”  Even you don’t fully believe it when it comes out of your own mouth, how can you expect him to?
There’s a strange look in his eyes, almost like he’s disappointed by your response. He turns his back to you, mumbling something about taking a shower. You watch him enter his bedroom, hearing him clear as day before he shuts the door with a dull thud. “I guess you don’t want me either.”
~~~
A week into being Toji’s live-in housekeeper, the two of you figure out a routine together that involves minimal interaction. You wake up in the morning to cook breakfast, eating it quickly and leaving the rest for him while you go out. You use this time to go for a walk, meet with Chiyo or your parents, do some grocery shopping, or just sit at the nearby park, enjoying the sun with your baby, who grows little-by-little each day.
Toji is usually gone the whole afternoon, either working out or gambling, so you’re able to do chores back at the house, like cleaning his room. He doesn’t return until dinnertime when tension seems to be at its highest. A big reason for that is because he’s made it a habit to eat right after his shower, shirtless and with his legs crossed on the floor, displaying a perfectly visible outline of his manhood. It’s distracting, to say the least. Chiyo mentioned the other day how you can have an increased libido during the first trimester. That’s definitely proving itself now.
Aside from the half-nakedness, something else surprises you about him. The two of you mostly avoid conversation with each other, eating in silence at the dining table while sneaking furtive glances whenever you get a chance. But he never fails to mutter, “Thank you for the meal,” before washing the dishes at the sink, retreating back into his room when he’s done. It’s the tiniest act of consideration that makes you wonder what’s going on in his head.
Tonight you sit across from each other as usual. You just finished eating the chicken katsu you made for dinner, along with a couple of side dishes you prepped earlier in the week. His abs look especially spectacular today and you find it harder than usual to stop peeking at them.
“You’re gonna burn a hole through me with the way you’re staring,” he says, chewing his last bite.
Shit, caught red-handed. You quickly look down at your empty bowl, mumbling an apology. “Sorry. I just…I can tell your hard work is paying off.”
“Yours too. The house has never been cleaner. And the food has never been better.” He’s looking directly at you, a genuine smile on his face. “Thank you.”
It’s no good. Your hormones are raging, sexual desire courses through you, all from that stupidly handsome grin and a silly little compliment. How did you ever think you could resist him?
You stand up, grabbing everything from the table. “I’ll do the dishes,” you offer, walking them to the sink, trying to calm down.
It’s no use, though. He sees right through you.
He gives you only a minute alone before he follows you, caging you between his big arms, your back to him, his mouth hot on your ear. “Let me help you.”
You let out a frustrated huff, already unraveling from his proximity. The smallest jut of your hips and there it is, his erection pressed to your ass, throbbing and even more massive than you remember it. “Toji, we can’t,” you whine, not making any attempt to separate yourself from him.
He slides his hands around your hips, pulling you in closer, rubbing his rock-hard cock against you. “I know you want it. I know you want me.”
And he’s right. You do. You want him with you, around you, inside of you. In all the ways he’s had you before, in new ways he’s never had but you’ve fantasized about. There’s no denying it anymore. You want him. You want him so fucking bad.
He takes you right there at the kitchen sink, bent over with your grip tight on the edge of the counter, pounding away at your wet, needy cunt. Neither of you bother to remove your clothes completely, Toji’s sweatpants shrugged down his thighs just enough, yours pooled around your ankles, soaked panties at your knees. “Fuck, Toji!” you moan, sticking your ass out to meet his thrusts.
His fingers find your clit, rubbing slippery circles around it. “Say it,” he grunts, increasing the pace.
Drools leaks out from the sides of your lips, too fucked out to process what’s he’s asking you. “What?”
“Say you want me,” he demands, massaging your swollen bud so deep, you feel it all the way down to your fucking toes.
“I want you. I want you, Toji!” you respond breathlessly, squeezing him tight with your orgasm.
“Fuck, I missed you. Missed my good girl.” He continues to fuck you, slowly now, relishing every second of being inside you. “Always so fucking creamy for me, fuck.” He pulls you up to embrace you from behind, fingers still pleasuring you, his other hand at your chin to face you towards him. The two of you kiss passionately, lips smacking, tongues swirling. So sloppy and wanton that it puts you on the verge of another orgasm, completely succumbed to pleasure.
You sleep with him in his bedroom after several more orgasms and a big one of his own, wrapped comfortably in his arms, with his cock and creampie inside you the rest of the night. For the first time in a while, you’re oddly at peace.
~~~
Your reckless decision making has led you into another troublesome scenario. Fortunately, you haven’t had any morning sickness the entire first week of your employment at the Fushiguro household. Unfortunately, it decides to come back today. There’s no way you’ll be able to make it to the bathroom near your room, so you have no choice but to hop out of Toji’s bed and run into his, clutching onto the porcelain bowl until it’s all out. You rinse your mouth off at the sink, hoping Toji didn’t hear any of it. But you know all too well by now that luck is never on your side.
He’s sitting up against the headboard, watching you come out of the bathroom. “Did you just puke in there?” There’s a hint of concern in his normally blunt tone.
You nod, bending down to retrieve your underwear and pants off the floor, avoiding his gaze.
“Are you sick?” he asks, the worry even more obvious now.
Shaking your head, you respond, “No, I just…I’m feeling a little nauseous, that’s all.” You walk towards the door, still not willing to look at him. “There should be leftovers in the fridge, so help yourself to breakfast. I’m going to lay down.”
He calls out your name. “Wait – ”
You ignore him, closing the door shut behind you, letting the tears fall down your cheeks as you retreat into your own bedroom, muffling your sobs into a pillow. After your wild romp last night, this bout of morning sickness has swiftly brought you back to reality. You’re still harboring the secret growing in your womb from the man who gave it to you to begin with.
There’s a firm knock on your door, startling you. “Hey, it’s me.”
In this split-second, you decide to stop with the lies and finally tell the truth. You open the door, Toji standing in front of you fully clothed in his usual attire, a serious expression on his face. “What’s going on? Talk to me.”
Eyes still puffy from crying, you take a deep breath. “I’m pregnant. And you’re the father.”
His mouth parts the slightest bit, no words coming out of it. The silence seems to linger on forever. You fill it by rambling all the thoughts that have been swimming in your head the last couple of weeks. “Before you start freaking out or anything, I’m telling you so that you know. I don’t expect you to be involved. I’m perfectly willing to raise this child on my own. And besides, I won’t be completely alone. I have my family to help me, my friends too. I’ll be totally fine. This baby is going to be well taken care of, I’ll make sure of it. I’m so sorry I didn’t tell you sooner. I just didn’t know how. But I feel better already because this has been stressing me out. It’s all going to work out okay? I think. I hope.”
After the long spiel, he stares down at the floor, jaw tight, mouth opening and closing, unsure how to respond. Eventually, he says, “I have to go.”
When he leaves the house, you crawl into your bed, bawling until there are no tears left for you to cry.
~~~
You wake up in the late afternoon to an enticing aroma wafting from the kitchen. It’s been hours since you’ve been in bed, moping about how poorly everything went with Toji. His reaction left you devastated. While you always expected to do this alone, hearing his negative response to it hurts more than you anticipated it to.
Curious, you make your way into the kitchen, shocked to find Toji standing over the stove, stirring a pot, the soothing scent of soup surrounding you. “What’s going on?” you ask, noticing a plethora of fresh vegetables laid out on the counter, along with a big bottle of prenatal vitamins and various snacks.
He turns the heat off, covering the pot with a lid. “I’m cooking,” he answers, facing you with a grin on his face. “Bone broth is a good source of calcium. And you need to keep eating lots of veggies so our baby is strong, like me. No more of this instant ramen shit.”
“I thought you were upset,” you say, stepping closer to him.  
“I know. I’m sorry I left like that. I was shocked at first, I’ll admit it. But I started to get excited." He takes your hands in his. "I have a lot of regrets in my life, but being a father isn’t one of them. Being a bad father is. I want to change. I need to change. For Megumi. For our new little one. For you.”
Strangely enough, you believe in his heartfelt declaration. You smile at him, letting him go to stand in front of the stove, taking a whiff of the comforting aroma of the hot soup he made for you, happy tears welling in your eyes. He hugs you gently from behind, nuzzling his nose to you. “I’m going to do it right this time, okay? I know I can do it with you.”
As Toji caresses your belly, kissing you softly along the neck, you feel the weight that’s been heavy on your shoulders ease up. Maybe this won’t be so bad after all.
1K notes ¡ View notes
ot8xbangchansgirlsblog ¡ 1 month ago
Note
Tumblr media
Don't mind me, just jumping into your asks. 😄
I had an idea/prompt for you! (Obviously you don't have to write it.) OT8 x fem is preferred but please, go nuts!! Thank you!!
*p.s. I am addicted to your writing works. I can't wait to see what you come up with!*
"His/their arms did what her sleeping pills couldn't."
Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media
𝕐𝕠𝕦𝕣 𝕞𝕪 𝕗𝕒𝕧𝕠𝕦𝕣𝕚𝕥𝕖 ℙ𝕚𝕝𝕝
Warning: Angst/comfort/fluff
Summary: Request!
✩₊˚.⋆☾⋆⁺₊✧
"Have you been sleeping?" Felix asks suddenly, breaking the comfortable silence in the kitchen. They were enjoying an afternoon snack that Leeknow had prepared for them after classes—a simple spread of sandwiches and fruit, but it felt warm and cozy.
Y/N sighed, taking a slow bite of the sandwich she was holding. If it weren’t for Lee Know insisting she eat something, she would probably be passed out from exhaustion by now. The weight of late-night studying and looming deadlines pressed down on her.
"Yes, I have. Just a lot of studying to do," she lied, trying to sound convincing.
"Hm? Are you sure?" Felix pressed, his eyes narrowing slightly. He knew her too well to buy into her facade.
"Yes, Felix, now drop it," she snapped, her voice sharper than she intended. Felix's face fell, and he pouted, his bottom lip jutting out in that adorable way that always made her heart soften.
"I was just asking. I didn’t mean to upset you—"
"Well, you are, so just leave me alone," she retorted, frustration spilling over. She knew she wasn’t angry at him; it was just that the exhaustion and irritability were clouding her thoughts. She hated taking it out on him.
"Fine," he replied, his expression clouding over as he frowned again. He stood up slowly, taking his plate with him, the sound of the chair scraping against the floor echoing in the otherwise quiet kitchen.
As he left, Y/N felt a pang of guilt settle in her stomach. She knew she needed to let him in, but right now, the weight of her fatigue felt like too much to bear.
She let out another frustrated sigh before putting away her empty plate and trudging toward her room, but she was soon interrupted by Seungmin, who playfully pulled her to the couch.
"Can you just listen to this?" he pleaded, handing her an AirPod. She sighed again, knowing she had just snapped at Felix and didn’t want to take her frustration out on anyone else.
"Y/N?" Seungmin called, snapping her out of her thoughts. She realized she had totally zoned out and barely heard the demo of the song he was working on.
"Did you like it?" he asked, his voice hopeful.
A pang of guilt washed over her, but she decided to lie again. "Yes, I did. It's amazing, Seungmin," she replied with a strained smile, handing him back the AirPod.
"That’s it?" he asked, looking confused. "Usually, you give me more details on where I can improve," he pouted, crossing his arms.
"W-well, maybe it’s just perfect, okay? Can we do this later, Seungmin? I promise I'll give you my full attention," Y/N begged. Her body ached, her head thumped like a bass drum, and her eyes felt like they were on fire. She could hardly keep herself upright.
"Are you sick? You look awful," Seungmin remarked, reaching out to check her forehead.
"Geez! Thanks. Means a lot," she grumbled, snatching her backpack and turning to leave.
"That's not what I meant—Y/N—wait!" But she was already in the hallway, refusing to look back.
It was as if the universe conspired against her because just as she was about to walk into her room, she was unexpectedly pulled into Hyunjin’s room.
"There you are! My favorite girl!" Hyunjin beamed, planting a soft kiss on her cheek. "How was school?"
Horrible. Disgusting. Tiring. Frustrating.
"Good," she replied flatly, forcing a smile.
"Great! So can I borrow you for tonight?" he asked, spinning her around and playfully carrying her toward the bed.
"Hyunjin..." she sighed, feeling the weight of the world on her shoulders. "I really wish we could go to the gallery, but I'm swamped with studying and—"
"Hey, baby!" Changbin interrupted, bursting into the room. "I was looking for you. Sorry to interrupt, but are we still on for the gym in 30?" His words hit her like a ton of bricks. She had totally forgotten!
Why does everyone want something from me today? she thought, feeling overwhelmed.
"Binnie..." she sighed again, tears welling in her eyes.
"God, I’m the worst girlfriend ever!" she huffed, her emotions boiling over. Without waiting for a response, she stormed out of the room and rushed to her own, knowing better than to lock it—Chan’s rules, after all.
She decided to lock her door and take a breather from everything. It wasn’t long before Changbin and Hyunjin knocked, but there was no response.
"Do you know what’s going on?" Changbin whispered to Hyunjin, concern on his face.
"No idea… maybe we should give her some space?" Hyunjin suggested, though neither wanted to leave her alone. They knew how she could shut down during tough times.
"I'll text Leeknow," Changbin decided, and they headed to the living room.
Meanwhile, Y/N felt overwhelmed. The pressure of school and her relationships weighed heavily on her. She tried to take a nap to recharge for the evening with her boyfriends, but sleep wouldn’t come. Her mind raced with thoughts of assignments, exams, and the expectations she felt from everyone around her.
"Forget this..." she whispered, pushing herself up and deciding to study instead. She shuffled to her desk, surrounded by textbooks and notes. Despite her exhaustion and the tears threatening to spill, she forced herself to focus on the pages in front of her.
Time slipped away, and she lost track of how long she had been studying when a loud knock startled her. "Y/N? You know I don’t like it when people lock doors," Chan called from outside, his voice a mix of concern and gentle authority.
It was 8:57, and she rubbed her eyes before reluctantly unlocking the door.
There stood Chan, looking concerned. Was he going to scold her?
"Hey, Y/N," he said softly, stepping inside.
She managed a small smile as he wrapped her in a warm hug. It felt so comforting that it made her wonder why she had been short with those she cared about. The weight of the world seemed to lift for a moment as she leaned into him.
"Channie... I’m so tired," she whispered into his shoulder.
"I know baby, shhh, it’s okay," he soothed, laying them both on the bed. He glanced around the room, noticing scattered books and an almost empty container of sleeping pills.
"Having trouble sleeping again?" he asked, worry in his voice.
"Mmhm," she sniffled.
"How long?" he continued, rubbing her back gently.
"Eight days..." she admitted, feeling shame wash over her.
"Eight days?!" he exclaimed, shocked that she was even functioning.
"I was going to tell one of you, but we’re all stressed with exams, and you have your comeback soon. I just couldn’t bring myself to do it," she cried, her voice breaking.
Chan let out a frustrated sigh. He cared deeply; that much was clear.
"What did I say about thinking for others?" he gently scolded. "What if I wasn’t busy? You can’t decide for me or the others when we’re available. Eight days isn’t healthy, and if I tell Leeknow, he’ll worry."
She lets out a whimper as the memory of how the last visit went. She had to be hooked up to many machines and monitors each monitoring her sleeping and to see what was wrong. She was exhausted for 12 hours straight in the hospital. "I’m sorry, please don’t tell him."
"Only if you promise to come to me whenever you’re struggling, okay?" he said, kissing her forehead and picking up the nearly empty container of pills. "How many have you taken? Are they not working?"
"It doesn’t work," she admitted, burying her head into his shoulder, feeling ashamed. "I tried taking three each night—"
"Three?! No way, Y/N, that’s not good for you, Please tell me you don’t feel sick."
"I don’t; I just feel cranky."
"Is that why you snapped at Felix?" he asked gently.
"Y-yeah. I should apologize to him," she said, avoiding his gaze.
"Hey, look at me," he said softly, kissing her cheek. "I know it gets tiring, but you have to communicate, okay? Wash up, and we can watch a movie downstairs. The boys are worried. Han's about to lose it. He's about to escape the restraints Leeknow put on him."
"Oh no," she giggled for the first time in a while. "Not time out!"
"I missed that smile," he said gripping at her waist.
"I thought I had to wash up?" she teased, feeling a bit lighter.
"Yah! Is it wrong to love my girlfriend? I already have to share you with those 7 idiots, Let me enjoy this," Chan said dramatically, pulling her close. He let her straddle his lap and both their core's lightly touched one another.
Another giggle escaped her lips as she leaned in for a quick kiss, feeling warmth spread through her despite her lingering exhaustion.
It did indeed take her longer to enter the shower, mainly because Chan was so committed to making her feel good. Basically she got the best head of her life. When she finally made her way downstairs to the theater, she was immediately tackled by Han, who showered her with kisses.
"I'm so sorry I didn't notice you felt this way! I should have paid more attention. I love you. Do you love me?" he exclaimed, his voice full of concern and affection.
"I love you, Han, and it isn’t your fault. I promise, bub," she replied, planting a gentle kiss on his forehead.
Changbin, who was nearby, chimed in, "I’m sorry for pushing you earlier, babe," as he handed her a takeout plate, realizing Han wasn’t letting go anytime soon.
"You don’t need to apologize, love. I should be the one apologizing for not communicating and just shutting down. I hope you all can forgive me; I haven’t been the best partner," she confessed, her voice a bit shaky.
"Oh hush!" Hyunjin interjected with a warm smile before giving her a kiss on the forehead and heading to his seat. "No need to apologize; we all have our moments."
"Yeah, he’s right. Totally forgotten," Seungmin added, snuggling into Hyunjin's side, a comfortable warmth radiating between them.
She turned to Felix, her heart racing a bit as she hoped he wasn’t angry. "Lix?"
"I could never be mad at you," he said softly, climbing by her side and planting gentle kisses on her cheeks. "I love you."
"I love you too," she replied, feeling her heart swell with gratitude.
The rest of the night was filled with lighthearted conversations and a movie. Everyone eventually drifted off to sleep, and she felt a profound sense of peace wash over her.
"Come on," Chan whispered, gently pulling her out of I.N and Han's grip. They let out little whines but soon settled back into slumber. She crawled onto Chan's lap, and he whispered soothing words to her while rubbing her back.
"Remember to always find me when your lost."
This was her happy place. As her eyes began to close and her breathing evened out, Chan placed a tender kiss on her forehead and held her close, ready to keep her safe until she woke up.
✩₊˚.⋆☾⋆⁺₊✧
Don't forget to reblog and follow! <3
A/N: Thank you @idoubleswearimawriter!!
Taglist: @ihrtlix@bowsnbang@katsukis1wife@thegingerthatwaited@thicccurls
@xxeiraxx @paleangelsweets @klaydohart @eastleighsblog @ivrespace
@galaxy4489 @purplepursepaint @catlove83 @sillystormsstuff @iwuberic
@cocofia143 @royal-shinigami @virluna148 @galaxycatdrawz @memersanonymous
@skz-stay13 @seungminsbest @hogwartslife64 @sinfulfic @hyunnesblog
@maisyyyyyy @cluelessred3 @leezanetheofficial @cocofia143 @lemonn015
@kkamismom12 @mei0packet @igetcarriedawaywithyou @hyuneyeon @iris-iiridescent
@mbioooo0000
(open: i believe i've added everyone but if you don't see your @ please comment down below)
311 notes ¡ View notes
hminnj ¡ 2 months ago
Text
Maybe In A Different Age
Senku/fem reader
cw: angst no comfort (i tried) ik this fandom kinda dead lowkey but I wanted to write this cause its so senku coded. Senku's an idiot (unsuprisingly). Not very good writing.
wc: uhh i wrote this in my notes, around 1k probably
-
Byakuya brings two strangers into their house on a random thursday.
"Senku, this is a close friend and her daughter, I'm sure you guys will get along splendidly."
"Ok."
Five year old Senku is harshly blunt when he meets you for the first time, staring at him silently as if you've never seen a human before. He doesn't have anything to say and it seems neither do you, so he walks off, deciding he has better things to do. Promptly ignoring the sigh and apology the older man lets out.
.
"So I got this new idea and I'm going through the basic logistics and research right now, might need your help later."
"I'll go get us some snacks and something to do while you work on it then."
Six year old Senku watches you dissappear from his doorway, absentmindedly humming while you head to the very familiar kitchen. Your family has been apparently busy as of late so he forcibly sees your face more often. You usually just eat his food, do your work, and ask him (dumb) questions. You're a friend now, he supposes.
.
"Hey dum dum, Byakuya got me new equipment, so I have some new ideas. So listen up."
"Course Senku!"
Seven year old Senku grins, you're always willing to help him out for whatever reason you have (something weird probably, in his opinion). In return, he always tells you what he's working on and his labor demands. So per usual, he excitedly gets into the details of the next project that he plans on working you and Taiju to the bone for.
.
"Hey Senku?"
"What?"
"I think I love you."
"Huh? You better not be catching feelings dum dum." He gives you a confused squint after hearing your words.
"Whatever you say." You hum
Eight year old Senku hears you say those three words for the first time, you don't say why and he doesn't know either. He thinks its rather idiotic, but he shrugs it off after you silently go back to reading. You've been picking up books more often as of late, not that he cares much.
.
"You're late for the test runs, Taiju and Yuzuriha already left."
"Sorry sorry! My teacher held me up a little later at practice today."
"Hm." His disappointed stare returns.
"Im sorry..? Love you?" You're sheepish with your response.
"How is that supposed to make up for anything? Now come help me carry this stuff"
"As you wish, princess Senku."
Nine year old Senku doesn't understand why you and Byakuya tell him that so often (or that stupid nickname sourced from his "feebleness"), but he moves on quickly to detail the results of the test and the numerous next steps. Much to his pleasure.
.
"Wake up stupid. You fell asleep." Senku (roughly) shakes you awake from your shoulders, poking at your face a few times.
"Huh? Oh sorry Senku, I guess I'm just tired."
"Well you're not gonna wanna miss this." He grins while looking up, expectant.
"Hm. Hey the moons pretty tonight yeah?"
"It looks the same as it always does. Is that poetry getting to you and making you sappy?"
You wait before responding, "Maybe."
Eleven year old Senku keeps you up on certain nights for his projects or for nights like these where there's a meteor shower. He thinks you should stop reading so much of those books that make you sound like Byakuya. You should also get more rest, he adds.
.
"Happy Valentines Day Senku!! Got you a gift, heh."
"Must I tell you again?" Senku turns to a usual sight, you waving a gift in front of his face as if he were a dog.
"I'm good I just wanted to remind you."
"Right."
Twelve year old Senku doesn't see the point in meaningless feelings or holidays for said feelings. Nevertheless, he takes the homemade chocolate from you, skimming through the card which contents include exactly what he expected (a confession of sorts, again), and placing it to the side. Ignoring it in favor of the much more sensible chemicals in front of him. Like every year though, Senku keeps it. He doesn't know why.
.
"Taiju and Yuzuriha definitely have something going on don't you think?"
"And you're bringing this up why?"
You pause, you know why, but you know he wouldn't understand. "It's cute... wish I could have something like that you know?"
"...For the last time-"
"I know I know Senku, don't worry I'll try to bother you less."
Thirteen year old Senku doesn't see you as much anymore, mostly because of your practice that your mom wants you to perfect. You come over less nowadays, a shame (for his projects obviously), but your presence isn't any smaller of an intrusion at school. So much for bothering him less.
.
Around 21:00 is when he hears the familiar ringing of his doorbell. "It's late, why are you here?"
"Got out of training not too long ago and wanted to see you before I headed in."
"Your house isn't even remotely close to mine" A raised eyebrow is all you get in response to your grin.
"What does it matter when I'm already here, but gotta go before I get scolded. Goodnight Senku, Love you!"
"You know it's never gonna happen, as you know-"
"Yeah yeah, 10 billion percent illogical, I know, but I can't let my favorite person forget can I?" You flash another smile.
"As if I'd ever with how often you say it, now goodnight."
Fourteen year old Senku closes the door after you've cheerfully said your bye and faded from his sight enough. The lack of noise is strange, now that Byakuya has "ascended like an angel" (his words not Senkus) it's much quieter. The usual noise of a certain two people is absent more often than not. He let's the silence of the house sit in.
.
"Hey, can you get me something from the storage real quick? Need it soon but that bonehead forgot when he came up here babbling about confessing to Yuzuriha"
"Of course. I'd do anything for you. Always here. You know that Sen."
Fifteen year old Senku glances at your fleeting figure. The nickname is new, for sure. And he can't say he dislikes it, but the lack of a certain three words with your departure is strange. He brushes it off to your usual forgetfulness and peers out the window at Taiju and Yuzuriha. Thoughts preoccupied until a bright green light overtakes his vision and he can't do anything but think into the void.
So he counts.
And maybe every once in a while you pop into his head like you always do.
.
Three-thousand and something year old Senku wakes up to a world where theres a lack of civilization, a lack of his decency, and most importantly, a lack of you.
You would be useful right now, he supposes.
.
Three-thousand and something year old Senku spends his free time trying to find you and the rest of the "gang" (as you would say).
He finds Taiju, he finds Yuzuriha, he also finds a lion-punching maniac, but there's no sign of you.
He's ten billion percent sure you survived.
Right?
The concerned stare Yuzuriha gives him as they part is ignored.
.
(Physically) Sixteen year old Senku celebrates this birthday gazing into the sky from his new observatory. It reminds him of a lot of things, but he can't help but notice how empty it is, it's eerily quiet.
He doesn't like it.
Senku wishes you were here.
His first real birthday wish.
.
(Still) Sixteen year old Senku breaks when he hears his father's voice again for the first time in ages. It's not his voice that gets to Senku. He's heard it plenty enough in his lifetime. It's the mention of you.
"Just kidding! I know it's you on the other side of this Senku! And ____'s there with you right? Please tell me you're dating already or even better married so I can have grandchildren. Please please please Senku! Although you can't really tell me that but-"
Senku stops himself from showing vulnerability in front of the village, and he also stops himself from pausing the record right there and then. Opting to sigh and curse his dad out as a cover up, his fist lightly punching the table.
"Damn you old man."
The questions from the villagers about who you could be are forgotten in favor of an angelic voice. Senku's quick to tune it out. It reminds him of you.
.
(Mentally) Sixteen year old Senku sits by himself that night. It's been a long day. The constant repeat of a certain melody in the background, more work for the science kingdom, and a few questions about who you were. They stopped after a few radio silences from him, feelings are hard for the scientist after all.
It's cold.
He wishes you were here.
It's dark.
He wishes you were here.
It's lonely.
He wishes you were here.
The day he can always guarantee you're there has long passed. You should be here, is what his mind tells him. You owe him for the past 3000 years of missed birthdays after all.
It's funny, in his opinion. That you were probably most-definitely always there. And the one (multiple actually, 10 billion in his mind) time he looks for you, you're not there.
He doesn't think its funny.
"I'd do anything for you huh..."
Anything but keep your word.
He scoffs, but it's directed at himself. He would never blame you for this, or anything for that matter, he can't.
So he sits. And he stays. Like you would've wanted him too. He looks at the clear sky like you usually do. And he notes how the moon is pretty tonight. Just like you.
"I love you too."
He's 10 billion percent sure he does.
-
Thanks for reading, if you did :). Sorry for any errors not fully proofread. Senku is so right person wrong time coded when it comes to romance that i had to write this even if its lowkey bad
187 notes ¡ View notes
forpiratereasons ¡ 1 year ago
Text
i found a genre of longform videos that is just 8-10 hours of someone driving around freeways during thunderstorms and i have a lot of thoughts about this but also: stede the driver who films long pov driving vids and extremely stressed ed who gets addicted to his channel
it's meditative, and it reminds ed of being in the car with his mum, driving across aotearoa. he feels like she's there with him sometimes. but the more he watches, the more he becomes aware of the driver--a sigh here, the shuffle of fabric in the seat there.
there's almost no information about him on his channel, the gentleman driver, not even a name or a pic, and ed becomes a little fixated on picking up details about him. doesn't happen often, but once or twice ed catches the driver humming a few beats before falling silent again, clearing a throat, sighing, clicking his throat like he's talking silently to himself.
once, on hour six of a ten hour vid, ed's rewarded by the view of an elegant hand reaching across the screen to grab something that must be on the dash in front of the camera. four seconds ed plays over and over.
"is there someone in the car with you while you drive?" ed asks in a comment. "or is it just you?"
the gentleman driver writes back, "just me and the open road!"
maybe it's the format that makes ed ask, the anonymity. maybe he's just half asleep. "don't you ever get lonely?"
it's days before the gentleman driver writes back again. "do you?"
ed's not got an answer for that. or, he does, but not one he's willing to face head on. he asks instead how the gentleman driver chooses his routes.
the driver doesn't get very many comments and definitely not very many questions, and soon they're having little conversations in the comments of every video. ed gets another glimpse of that elegant hand, with a big turquoise ring, freckled forearm; hears another few bars of 'here comes the sun' hummed.
then the driver does something new: he stops at a rest stop.
and he leaves the camera rolling.
ed watches in rapt fascination as the driver crosses the screen in front of the car, goes into the rest stop. blond hair, broad shoulders, floral shirt. he's actually wearing jeans for an eight hour drive which is insane, and ed gets a glimpse of his profile as he smiles. insane.
if the driver's ever stopped before, it's been very carefully edited out. maybe he forgot this one. maybe he wanted ed to see. that's delusional, ed thinks, but he still navigates to the driver's about page and pokes around until he finds an email address.
nice shirt, he sends.
oh god, the driver sends back, and the video disappears from his page half an hour later. i forgot the editing. i'm sorry if it was distracting.
no, i liked it, ed tells him. it was nice to see the man behind the steering wheel. and then, hesitating only a bit, he adds: i'm ed.
hello, the driver writes. i'm stede.
the emails go on, and on, and eventually they turn into texts too, and promises from stede to check in on his longer drives, to "call if you ever need someone to keep you awake."
"i'm supposed to be sending you to sleep," stede argues.
"i'll sleep better knowing that you're safe," ed writes back.
the next video stede posts, he lets the camera run all the way until he's pulled into a parking spot at a roadside motel just outside of denver. the camera runs one minute, then five, and any reasonable person would've turned it off by now, but ed waits until he hears, very quietly: "safe and sound, now. go to sleep. goodnight."
is it stupid, to think you can fall in love with someone after just one sentence? is it still stupid, if that one sentence repeats at the end of every new video?
then one night the phone rings. it's late, dark out, and ed knows stede was doing a drive that wouldn't have him at his next stop until nearly one in the morning. he picks up. "hello?"
"oh, ed," the voice says. "you've no idea how good you sound just now."
it's a voice he's only heard before in hums and whispers, but it doesn't matter. lots of things about love are stupid, ed decides. this isn't one of them.
stede's blown a tire. "i'm okay," he insists. "i was just hoping for some company while i wait for the tow."
"where are you?"
"middle of nowhere," stede says, but when he names the spot, it's only two hours out. ed can be there faster than a tow probably would, and there's a note of anxiety in stede's voice he doesn't much like.
he's got his shoes on and his keys in his hand before he can think twice.
stede hems and haws but in all his fussing he doesn't actually tell ed not to come, and he stays on the line while ed piles blankets in the car and as he gets behind the wheel and as he sets out on the freeway. he stays on the line and they talk until they're both creaky with exhaustion and dry air, and then they're quiet, just like in stede's videos, but together this time. then ed crests over a hill and there it is: a car pulled off to the side with its hazard lights blinking. reminds ed of a lighthouse. 'i'm here,' the lights say. 'i'm here.'
he pulls to a stop behind, starts his own hazards. the driver side door of the car opens, and then there's a leg, and a body, and there he is. stede. he's still got his phone pressed to his ear; ed can hear him breathing.
"i'm going to get out," ed says.
"okay," stede says.
it takes another long moment, watching stede stand there in the dark, waiting for him. stede, with his hair and his voice and his hands and the way the quiet in him already feels like home.
"i might kiss you," ed says.
he watches stede swallow, hard. eyes widen. "okay," he says.
ed reaches for the handle. pops the door open. puts one foot out on the pavement and looks up to meet stede's eyes as his cabin lights come on, as the car starts to ding its door-open warning.
"oh," stede says.
ed takes a step. they both still have their phones in their hands, their breathes in each other's ear. ed takes a step and takes a step until he can reach out to take stede's phone from him. press the call end button.
"hi," he says.
stede kisses him.
after that there are other, shyer hellos, and other, more awkward ones too. there are ten minutes to a 24-hour macdo drive-thru for coffee and another ten to a motel and a late night that becomes an early morning by way of conversation. there's laughter, and more kisses, and careful fingers learning the planes of each other's faces. in the morning there's breakfast and a tow truck and an invitation to a place just two hours away.
and there's a long break in updates to the gentleman driver's channel.
when he comes back, weeks later, his update schedule isn't quite as frequent, and his drives don't usually go as far. there's giggles sometimes, in the background, like there might be someone else in the car with him.
"do you miss it," ed asks. "driving the long drives?"
"no," stede says. "i found what i was looking for."
*
@ kninjaknitter also podficced this one!
705 notes ¡ View notes
tlbodine ¡ 1 year ago
Text
Stuck? Try junebugging.
I don't know who needs to hear this, but we're 5 days into nanowrimo so maybe this will be helpful.
Do you want the safety and surety of knowing what happens next in your story but can't stick to an outline? Does knowing in advance what will happen suck the joy out of discovery writing? Do you try to wing it through plots but get tangled in plot holes or have a story that runs out of steam because you can't figure out what went wrong? Are you at your most creative when you have a little bit of guidance? Do you tend to under-write? Do you get ideas in your head for random scenes and snippets that drop from the sky without context?
If any of these apply to you, junebugging a draft might be for you!
What Is Junebugging?
Since you're on Tumblr, you might already be familiar with the concept of junebugging as it relates to cleaning. If not -- I think the idea was first introduced to me by @jumpingjacktrash.
The basic idea is that you tackle cleaning by way of controlled chaos. You pick a specific area you want to focus on, like your kitchen sink, and then wander off to deal with other things as they occur to you, but always returning back to that area. You end up cleaning a little bit at a time in an order that may not make sense to an outsider but which keeps you from getting overwhelmed and discouraged.
How Does Junebugging Work in Writing?
OK, so that's great, but how does this work with writing? Well. In my case, the general idea is to jump between writing linearly, outlining, and writing out of order. It usually looks something like:
Start free-writing a scene, feeling my way through it and enjoying the discovery process.
Thinking, ok, now I have this scene, did anything need to happen to lead up to it? Do I need to go back and add some foreshadowing? Does this scene set anything up that needs to be paid off? And then jump forward/back to make those adjustments.
I'll usually have a bunch of disconnected ideas of ideas that have popped into my head, so I'll write those down in a list somewhere and then try to figure out what goes in between them and what order it goes in.
I'll write what I call "micro-scenes" which is where I'll just sketch out a few essential elements of what's going on without worrying too much about details, description, etc. -- just he did this, she said that, the setting was this, real bare-bones script. Then I can come back through and flesh out each of those microscenes into an actual scene later.
Got a story that has a complex structure? No problem. Write through each storyline one at a time and then chop them up and weave them together afterward. Write all the B plot scenes first then come back through to do A plot and C plot. Move the pieces around like legos. No one ever has to know.
This method works for me because I can't "decide" story elements in advance. I have never been able to just sit down and "figure out" what happens in a story beyond a couple steps ahead -- I have to discovery-write my way forward. But at the same time, that gets really daunting. So I zoom forward with micro-scenes, roughing out the beats in the most bare-bones way possible, then when I run out of clear vision for what happens next I backtrack, flesh out those scenes, build in connective tissue, etc. and by then I will probably find more inspiration to jump forward.
It's basically folding drafting, outlining, and revising all together into a single phase of writing, which is chaotic and goes against everything people teach you, but if it works? then it fuckin works.
Anyway, sorry for the jumbled-up post, I'm dashing this off quickly while I heat up a pizza and I'm about to dive back into my WIP -- but I hope this was a little helpful. If nothing else, take this as my blanket permission that it's 100% OK to jump around, write out of order, write messy, outline sometimes, pants sometimes, and do whatever else it takes just to get through the story. You've got this. Good luck.
977 notes ¡ View notes
3hks ¡ 4 months ago
Text
How to "Copy" a Character (Step-by-Step Guide)
Have you ever fallen in love with a specific character's concept? Where you absolutely NEED a similar character in your story, but aren't too sure on how to mimic it? It's quite simple, really, so let's get into it! (Disclaimer: If this qualifies as plagiarism or anything similar, please let me know ASAP and I'll take this down immediately. I do not support plagiarism and I do not wish to be encouraging it, even if indirectly.)
1. LIST EVERYTHING
Once you have your chosen character, list everything you know about them. This especially applies to personality traits, habits, emotions, and thought processes. Make sure to include their negative qualities and any headcanons you have! Circle or highlight any defining characteristics of the character because it may be the same for your fresh one.
2. REMOVING AND REPLACING
Your list should be rather long if you were thorough. Now, strike out anything you don't want to be a part of your new character and include any original features you want to add. This altered list should have pretty much their whole personality and you can work from there!
3. WHEN AND HOW?
Now, let's put the personality to use! Adding onto your list of traits, add when/how they will show. This way, you are able to keep your character's character in check. Starting with the five senses is a good idea, but you can go from there! (This is kind of confusing so let's look at an example! ^^)
NAME
Affectionate: Physical
Relaxed: Verbal (Tone)
Stubborn: Verbal
Fashionable: Physical appearance
Anxious: Mental (Only shows in xxx situations)
Unpredictable: Actions/Physical
Does this make more sense now? There are many different ways of demonstrating one's qualities and to keep things organized, it's a good idea to know how they'll demonstrate it! And if you study your original inspo character, you'll see that they establish certain attributes exclusively by how they talk or act!
4. FINE DETAILS
Alrighty! Finally, let's include all the fine details about your character! This will vary amongst everyone, but there are a couple of things that I highly encourage you include!
Morals
People they're close to
Relationships between the people above
Goals
Love language
Habits
Backstory (This can come later, but it's good to have one at any point)
And lastly, list ALL the differences between your new character and the reference one! Maybe they both show passion but in different ways, or maybe they have separate speech patterns! It's always interesting to see how far you have gone!
See? In all honesty, it's really straightforward and just about breaking the characters down in order to rebuild them in the way you want!
Just an extra note, school has OFFICIALLY started for me! I'll still be uploading once or twice a week, but please stick with me if I'm a bit late! This school year already seems far busier than the one before, so I need to figure out how to re-balance things!
Thank you all so much for 700 followers!! It's crazy in all honesty (I haven't been giving out the best content recently, ik) T~T but I WILL WORK HARDER!
Happy writing~
3hks <3
179 notes ¡ View notes
cvnt4him ¡ 4 months ago
Note
hiii! would you be willing to write some Iida x older!reader? like a senpai from U.A., one or two years older. thank you in advance!! ❤❤❤
I would love too<33
Tenya is so underrated chat he needs more love SEND ME MORE TENYA REQUESTS.
Tumblr media
Being a third year at UA was interesting to say the least, you had a lot of respect from your younger classmen. However when people found out who you were dating they always gave you weird looks.
You walked down the first year halls at the end of the day getting glances and whispers from the first years crowing the halls. You brush it off and continue strolling to your desired destination.
You finally come across the class you were looking for; class 1A! The only class fit for your charming and adorable boyfriend. You peek through the door to see your midnight haired boyfriend tidying up and talking with his friends, it was so cute to see the way he mingled with them.
You knock on the opened door and the few people's eyes shoot to your direction, you offer a polite smile and a giggle as you head towards your boyfriend who had wide eyes and a bit of blush dusting his features.
"hey tenya, ready to go?"
You ask running your fingers through his hair, he was taller than you but everyone knew you were older than him, hell than everyone in that classroom. You were pretty well known however you didn't really dabble with titles or anything like that, you didn't care what people knew you as.
"ah! y- y/n.. you shouldn't be here at this time! I told you I'd text you when I was ready."
Tenya was embarrassed from the looks of his friends, a green haired boy had wide eyes and slight pink brushed over his freckled cheeks, he looked between the two of you before connecting the dots with a gasp. You look down to him and he blushed intensively.
You chuckle and swipe a quick kiss from tenya before putting the top of his head.
"I'll wait for you outside, yeah? Don't take too long love."
You say walking out and waving to his friends with a wink, the freckled one was still stunned and the brown haired girl was squealing and jumping up and down once you left. No one knew you and tenya were dating, everyone thought tenya was incapable of getting a girlfriend due to the way he acts.
The two of you started dating unintentionally. You asked for his number one day and he nervously whilst stuttering, gave it to you. You two talked a lot it was more of him asking for advice and if you could tutor him or if you'd like to study with him.
Tenya was smart sure but you were in a higher grade than him, he thought if you could help him out his work maybe he'd be able to easily understand your work as well. At the time when you two started hanging out more he didn't realize it but he actually enjoyed your company.
He thought you were funny, smart, eager to learn just like him! He found many similarities within the two of you and he liked he could be himself around you. When the stuff went down with his brother he accidentally ended up crying in front of you, tenya expected you to laugh or make fun of him but of course, you didn't. You held him close and made sure that he was okay.
Unknowingly, that's when he started catching feelings for you. He wanted to be around you more, talk to you more he just really liked you, your company. It took him a while to realize he liked you, but once he did he didn't know how to ask you out or if he even wanted to.
Eventually you began seeing the signs of him starting to like you, he was more brushy around you, more talkative. It's not like tenya didn't speak when you two hung out but now he was so eager to share every little detail of his life with you. It was rather obvious he had a slight thing for you, and you'd be lying if you thought that he wasn't cute.
To save him the trouble some time later you went ahead and asked him out on a date. Tenya was so flustered and confused, he thought you were psychic or something, he ended up telling you that he was planning on asking you out on a date officially as well. You two laughed it off over lunch and sooner or later just naturally started dating.
You two never really put labels on it until one time.he got jealous. You were hanging out with mirio and you two were getting quite close, mirios a naturally charming guy. He's funny, weird, and just honestly great company.
Tenya did not like that. Tenya never had a problem with mirio, he just disliked how close he was with you. Tenya tried to keep his distance from you as a punishment to himself for even letting himself slack off of hero/school work. He felt that he shouldn't have gotten a girlfriend, he shouldn't have fallen in love with you, he shouldn't have even talked to you or indulged in you.
However, tenya found.himself fidgeting and having trouble focusing on class. He hadn't talked to you in 2 days and it was driving him insane that you hadn't bothered to text him! Were you not worried? Did you not care about him? What was it.. were you cheating on him?!
He was never one to jump to conclusions but he couldn't help himself! The second that bell rang he zoomed out of the classroom to reach you, he headed over to the third years classes in search of you. Once he found your class he asked around for you.
"tenya? What are you doing here lover?"
"y/n.. I.. I..—"
He was at a loss for words. He didn't know why he rushed to you, he didn't know why he was jumping to conclusions.. you weren't known for being unloyal or untrustworthy. So why did he feel this fiery rage of jealousy burbling inside of him?
You pulled tenya out for the classroom and walked him to the outside of the school, the cherry blossom petals flying down to the ground d beautifully, they painted a sweet little walkway across the side walk, and all over the bench the two of you sat down at.
"tenya, what's going on sweetie?"
He loved when you had a variety of pet names to call him. He got quite flustered whenever you called him anything other than tenya.
You pulled his head onto your chest and brushed your fingers through his hair, he closed his eyes and let the breeze of the wind fly onto his face and through his hair.
Tenya sighs and wraps his arms around you holding you close, he couldn't find any words to say so he simply lived in this moment. You knew that something was up, but you'd ask again once he felt like talking.
Tumblr media
AN: this is the worst shit I've ever written. I love tenya iida but I have a hard time writing for him, others see him as this uptight dork but I do believe that he strays away from that robotness once like he gets a bit older. Just me? Okay.. I love him sm chat I need to get better at writing for him
151 notes ¡ View notes
anadiasmount ¡ 10 months ago
Note
what do you think an ideal date with jude be like?
a love for the books - jude bellingham x reader.
quick sum: request above!
wc: 1.3k | masterlist | jude’s masterlist
HIII MY LOVE!! i’m so sorry this was delayed but i’m posting this in honor of valentine’s day 😣🤍 ik this might be a little over the top, but knowning how jude is...🤭 HERE’S THISSS FOR YOU AND ANYONE READING!! like always, hope you enjoy bc it’s pure fluff 🤍🤍
“look so pretty for me darling,” jude said coming up behind you where you shyly looked away as you finished clasping your earrings on. “seriously, like how did i get this lucky,” jude kisses your temple and sighed in relief as he hugged your waist.
you smelled his familiar cologne, kissing his bicep that was bare as he wore a simple black button-up and some jeans. looking more boyfriend than ever. “i don’t know jude, you tell me. i’m the lucky one for being able to spend my weekend away with my boyfriend for the first time in weeks,” you say teasingly.
“you’re right. but i have a girlfriend who is patient, loves and cares for me, and planned this evening for the two of us. don’t worry i have something special in store for you later,” jude leans down and pecks your lips in a loving manner, a groan stuck in his throat as he tastes your sweet taste.
“cmon i wanna eat, i’ve been dying to eat for hours,” jude says pulling you to the door hand to hand. “jude wait hold, wait jude! i need my shoes and my purse,” you say giggling and rushed. jude sits impatiently as you finish final details, sighing in relief once you finished.
jude opens the passenger door for you, refusing to let you do anything and let him be the gentleman he is. he keeps a hand on your thigh but from time and time, he'll interlock hands and kiss the back of it gently, giving you a cheeky smile as he sang to his music.
he led you to your table at the exclusive and private restaurant, never letting go until he grabbed your chair and helped you get seated. his brows pulled in as he scanned through the menu, telling you different options of what he saw or what he was in the mood for.
"we'll take the roscatto red wine in a bottle, and bread rolls for starters," jude spoke kindly, his thumb rubbing your skin as you continued to scan in the menu, thanking the waiter when they brought and filled your glass.
"what's the surprise you mentioned," you asked curiously, leaning your head on your hand that rested on your table. "it won't be a surprise if i tell you," jude snickered, grabbing a small bite of the golden warm bread. "yes but i'm impatient and want to know," you moaned. "if you keep whining i'll blindfold you and won't let you see the entire ride there," jude raised his brow testing you.
"fine, now what are you thinking of getting?" you asked taking a sip of the red wine carefully. "maybe the honey garlic salmon with a side of stirred veggies?" he said slowly as he read the menu. you winced in a disgusted manner, shaking your head at the thought of seafood, "ew..."
"oh please," jude laughed at you, "i bet you'll order pasta or noodles of some sort knowing how you are," jude teased earning a dramatic gasp from you. "for your information, i was thinking of it... BUT i'm going to go with the steak with a side garlic parm zucchini bites and stuffed rolls," you poke your tongue out.
jude and you speak quietly among yourselves, laughing loudly as you remember old memories and remince those times where you first met, last minute dates because you had missed each other. going to random gas stations to get snacks, or stay up all night on facetime.
you could remember it all, write all the memories down on sheets of papers and turn them into a book if you wanted to. jude always tells you the day you have kids, and once they’re bigger, he couldn’t wait to tell them just exactly how you met. how his heart bang out his chest and saw everyone blurry and just you standing in the room.
how nervous he was trying to approach you. the eagerness inside him to hear you laugh or make you smile. how determined he was to get your number or any sort of contact because he knew. how much off a stuttered mess he was once he finally asked you if you want to go inside for a drink. how he felt like the luckiest man on earth, almost cried, when you told him the three words.
through think and thin. you were it for him. and he’ll never ever let go of you.
“cmon… we’re almost there baby…” jude said as he dragged you along the gravel road down into a wet trail. “jude when you mentioned surprise i though a movie night with a fort and a game off poker, not this! i just ate and all this walking is gonna make me throw up,” you laughed nervously, almost misplaced your step any a giant rock.
“funny you say movie night… what if we have a movie night here,” jude closed your eyes, then revealed the open setting. “we can star and moon gaze if we get bored, but we can have a movie night here with all these snacks surrounding us,” jude kisses your forehead, watching your mouth agape as you saw the laid out pillows and sheets, a small table containing the snacks and jude’s ipad.
“jude… this is so CUTE. I LOVE YOU! I LOVE YOU! you’re the best boyfriend i could ever ask for,” you squeal hugging him so tight he’s afraid you’ll break his bones. “only boyfriend you’ll have,” jude states in a possessive manner making you roll your eyes playfully.
“only boyfriend i know, unless for some reason henry cavil turns up single?” you shrug pouting your bottom lip, jude immediately frowning as he followed your steps into the sheets laid out. “uhm first off all were both english. second of all that won’t ever happen, i’ll make sure if it. third of all, you say all this after i do this for my lovely girlfriend?” jude speaks as hoe watches you set up the pillows and open bags of chips.
“i was just kidding… you’re the only hero in my life, and i can’t wait to make more of these memories with you,” you say after nagging an upset jude to lay down. he has one hand under his head, as the other one strokes your back, the bringing it up to tuck a curl back, brushing your cheek and leaning up to capture your lips.
you melt inside, feeling a burn sensation as he kiss your lips. this felt different than past times, the way he holds you, kissing you like a starved man, hands brushing and pulling you on top of him so he can further the kiss even more. your hearts beat quicker, not once pulling away, just in your own world with jude.
“as much as i want to fuck you against these sheets… i want to watch the movie with you,” jude pulls away breathless, smears of your lipstick all over his lips as he closes his eyes trying to calm down. “and what if i say i don’t want to watch the movie… that i’ll take that offer right now,” you whisper, kissing his jaw, making jude shiver.
“if you’re a good girl and do what i’ll say, i’ll gladly grant the wish, so turn around for me and press play…” jude’s voice then deep nudging to the ipad and watching you slowly turn and lay on his arm, feeling your nails gaze onto his skin as you traced his veins.
after a couple minutes of silence and just your breaths and watching the movie, you feel jude pull the strap of your dress down and pepper kisses all over your bare shoulder. “stay still, gonna give my girl the love and care she deserves…”
your love was definitely a story for the books.
366 notes ¡ View notes
sugdenlovesdingle ¡ 22 days ago
Note
can you write a story where Tommy hides a relatively minor injury from buck and when buck finds out he freaks out( angry) but everything turns out okay in the end
"You brought me here? You ratted me out?"
"Dude, look at the state of you. Don't you think your husband of six months would notice?" Eddie said, parking his car in front of Buck and Tommy's house. "I still don't know why you called me instead of him."
"You're a medic! I needed medical help. "
"Yeah, we have these great places called hospitals. You can go there if you need medical help and they give it to you. They can even give you painkillers or numb the area if you need stitches."
Tommy rolled his eyes.
"Enough with the sarcasm, Diaz. You could have brought me to your place. I would have been fine there for a couple of hours until Evan went on shift. I would have had 48 hours to patch myself up and he wouldn't have had to worry." he moved to try and open the passenger door without hurting himself more, but it was yanked open before he could do so.
"Tommy! What the hell happened?" Evan caught him just before he could faceplant onto the pavement.
"It's worse than it looks." Tommy said and then scrunched his face up. "Wait. No. It looks worse than it is." he corrected himself. "Rough landing. It's fine."
"It doesn't look fine. You look like you just went ten rounds with Mike Tyson." Buck said and turned to Eddie. "What happened?"
"I don't know. He just called me and asked if I could pick him up at Harbor." Eddie shrugged. "He wouldn't let me take him to the ER so I cleaned him up best I could with the med kit I keep in my car... but it's not ideal. That's why I texted you, maybe he'll listen to you."
"Traitor." Tommy said, annoyed. "You're supposed to be my friend."
"I am your friend. And I'm also his. And my ankle still hurts on rainy days so I'm not getting in between the two of you again."
"That was years ago!" Buck protested.
"Tell that to my ankle." Eddie replied. "You good with him on your own?"
"We're fine." Tommy said and tried to slam the car door shut while also keeping himself upright and not letting Evan know how much he was hurting.
"Yeah I can handle him. Can you tell Bobby I'm not coming in today? I'll call him later to explain."
"Evan you don't have to stay home to babysit me." Tommy said both both men ignored him.
"Sure. Let me know if you need anything. I can swing by if we have some downtime."
"Thanks." Evan shut the car door and took Tommy inside and deposited him on the sofa. He gently grabbed his chin and turned his head from left to right. "Did Eddie stitch up your eyebrow?"
"Yeah... I told him to just stick a bandage on it but he insisted. It's fine."
"You keep telling yourself that." Evan told him and sat down on the coffee table in front of him, looking him up and down, trying to figure out if he had any other injuries. "Want to tell me what happened? Without using the word fine?"
Tommy took a deep breath and tried to hide the wince when he did. Evan just raised an eyebrow at him.
"The new probie. I shouldn't have left him fly in this weather."
"He crashed?"
"No, no crash. Just a rough landing. We got knocked around a little. it's f- not so bad."
"You're going to be black and blue in a couple of hours. Have you taken anything for the pain?" Buck asked, accepting he wasn't going to get a more detailed answer right now.
"I was going to get something from the place near Eddie's house. Before he ratted me out and drove me here."
Buck rolled his eyes and got up.
"You're impossible, you know that? I'm getting you some ibuprofen." he gently kissed the top of Tommy's head. "You're lucky I love you."
----
send me prompts and I'll write you a ficlet!
121 notes ¡ View notes
kamiversee ¡ 8 months ago
Text
The F*ck List (semi-official) Breakdown.
Tumblr media
The following was submitted by my lovely ☃️anon, & I needed to make this it’s own post given how long it is, my replies & clarifications are written in between this breakdown & theory (Ex: A/N > Etc.). 
Here, you’ll find majority of details you may have missed & maybe even more to think about. Enjoy :)
(wc; 5.7k) (content; spoilers ofc)
Tumblr media
holy shit Kami. i literally had to take the entire day to process everything. before anything else, i need you to know that you've created an absolute masterpiece. TFL was the first fic i ever cared to keep up with and it has set the bar impossibly high for any other writer out there. please take your time with TFL 2, i'm so excited to read your other work!! also a break sounds like it would be so good for your mind considering how long you've dedicated yourself to this story 😭😭😭 you're seriously impressive. heads up, i didn't proofread this at all bc i finished typing this at 4 am LMFAO so forgive me if it's all scrambled and makes no sense.
┏━━━
A/N > Thank you for taking the time to write this breakdown, I seriously appreciate it so I wanted to take my time in responding to it & engaging with you :)
┗━━━
now, on to the yap. i deadass cracked my knuckles before typing all this out.
┏━━━
A/N > You’re so real for tht ngl
┗━━━
i reread the entirety of TFL from chapter 1 and my brain is so melted from analyzing that i'll prob find more details tomorrow after i sleep on some theories 😭 BUT HOLY FUCK YOU REALLY WEREN'T KIDDING WHEN YOU SAID YOU WERE HINTING AT GOJO'S OBSESSION SINCE LITERALLY THE FIRST CHAPTER??? the fucking hint being that "Gojo's desire for you is so strong it's almost frightening." GIRLLLLLL 🫵🫵🫵🫵🫵🫵
your foreshadowing and referencing is insane. idk if you intended a lot of it, but a lot of it caught my eye.
┏━━━
A/N> I TOLD YOU GUYS IVE BEEN DOIN IT SINCE THE FIRST CHAPTER !! Okay not exactly but like there was a vibe I had from the first chapter & when I later came up with the twist & went back and saw that everything would connect perfectly ^.^
┗━━━
chapter 7; the reader and Gojo have lighthearted banter about how the reader "started this" situation.
"I made a mistake." [reader] 
"A good one." 
"Bad one." You correct.
this was regarding a completely different situation but it baffled me how much it connects to the plot itself; the reader making the "mistake" of leaving her door open, and how it lead to months full of trauma and love. probably completely unintentional, but such a good detail.
┏━━━
A/N > Very intentional btw, it’s supposed to be known that, in a sense, Gojo x reader is forbidden :)
┗━━━
Choso's still staring at you intently, "What version of you would someone not like?" 
The way he words his question only furthers that little feeling in your chest. It's almost as though he were implying that any and all versions of you would be acceptable in his eyes. - Chapter 16
THE WAY WE SHOULD HAVE KNOWN THAT CHOSO WOULD STICK BY US REGARDLESSSSSSSS AAAAAA WE'RE SO BLIND!!! i just hope this stays true to the sequel :')
"No, I wish you didn't have to hate me." He says, shutting his eyes again and sucking in a deep breath, "B-But... it's uh, It's okay. I can live with you hating me." - Chapter 21
AAAA WE SHOULD HAVE KNOWN!!!! WE SHOULD HAVE KNOWN THIS WAS FORESHADOWING OUR FUTURE WITHOUT GOJO 😭😭😭 how he can live with the idea of the reader hating him so long as she's happy with Choso, especially considering his later revelations of how twisted his actions were and how if you stuck with him, he'd view you differently. fuck.
You despise the fact that he loves you. To you, it's almost entitled for him to feel like he has that right. How dare he hold such a strong emotion for you? If he felt this way, why is he forcing you to sleep with people for him? It makes no sense. 
Why would someone claim to love you and put you through so much? 
If he's been in love with you all this time, why start the list in the first place? Why couldn't he have just tried to win your heart from the beginning? Why the list? Why the blackmail? You don't understand him. - Chapter 23
i'm crushed. we didn't understand because we didn't know that Sukuna was involved. that could mean a million other things. i have some far-fetched theories about this but hear me out later!!!
the entirety of chapter 23 had me fucking floored while i was rereading. THE FORESHADOWING WAS EVERYWHERE!!! EVERY FUCKING WHERE
"No sweetheart, Sukuna's an asshole but..." His expression flickers and his smile fades away. He swallows and then clears his throat, "I'm pretty sure he'll satisfy you just fine." 
...
You narrow your eyes at him, "Are you sure?" 
...
 "Fuckin' positive," Gojo suddenly sounds pissed and you grow concerned. The arm around you gets a little tighter while he walks you through some crowds and you keep looking at the man confused. 
There's a vein popping out along his jawline because of how hard he's gritting his teeth.
of course he's aggravated because he knows that Sukuna is the one behind the list in the first place 😭😭😭 I'M SORRY WE DOUBTED YOU SATORU, FUCKKKK
——FIFTEEN MINUTES. That was the exact amount of time it took you to seduce Sukuna. The act was way too easy. Actually, it was suspiciously easy.
BECAUSE HE FUCKING KNEW 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭
"What all did you plan on doing tonight aside from getting harassed by strangers?" Sukuna suddenly questions against your skin. 
You ignore how close he is and the way his lips make you tense, turning your head to face forward. Chuckling at his last comment, "Same thing as everyone else here." You reply, slightly confused by his question. 
"Bullshit," He utters, "Nobody dresses like this without the intent of gaining my attention," Sukuna claims while his hands slide back down along your body.
this 100% could be just him being cocky and Sukuna, but the recent reveal just makes this feel like an extra demeaning interaction. but of course, it's Sukuna.
chapter 24 is so fucking shady too with everything we know. i know you addressed some of these points already bc i brought them up in previous anon messages, but these things still had me paranoid;
the way Sukuna leaves us and tells the reader to go to his room after a certain amount of time (i know he could have just been tidying up real quick but everything about this man has me on edge)
┏━━━
A/N> A lot of people are on edge about this but I’ll be honest, there’s nothing crazy that happens in between this time period. Not saying nothing happens but nothing crazy— it’ll be addressed later (in the next fic most likely)
┗━━━
the way he's been consistently on the phone since the reader entered the room, which is shortly after she messaged Gojo saying that she'll be able to cross Sukuna off of this list by tonight which he wasn't happy with at all.
no seriously, he kept diverting his attention to something in the bathroom and then came out, still on his phone. maybe he's talking to literally anyone else but STILL I'M PARANOID
┏━━━
A/N> This is to show the fact that Sukuna is a very socially active individual, & hints to the theory (I think you later state) that he has connections.
┗━━━
this happens in chapter 25 but the way he keeps smiling while the reader kisses him is just so smug of him especially considering the original reason as to why the reader's even interacting with him
then the spicy chapters with Sukuna…
the foreshadowing that the lack of knowledge of Sukuna's reputation will come back to bite her in the ass; first with the knowledge that he is abusive, and then her finding out that he is the curator of the list, knowing the full details of her blackmail and even threatening her again.
WHO DID HE FUCKING FIGHT HELPPPPP MY MIND IS BOGGLING there's no way it's Gojo, right? they're both too unscathed in these next few chapters for there to have been a fight between the two of them.
┏━━━
A/N > It’s not Gojo. 🙏
┗━━━
THE FUCKING MOMENT WHERE HE CONTEMPLATED SOMETHING WITH THE PHONE IN HIS HAND??? I FUCKING KNEW IT. I FUCKING CALLED IT WAS SOMETHING SHADY AS HELL.
┏━━━
A/N> The other Sukuna hint I was talking about is right before this moment btw, you’re welcome ;)
┗━━━
then he has the audacity to hold his tongue right afterwards?? it's such a big hint towards the fact that he knew about the list from the beginning UGHHHHHHHH.
the way he tried to humor the reader about her "job" even though he was in on the whole thing. UGH. SUKUNA WHEN I GET YOU SUKUNA?? 👊👊👊👊 especially with that "whore" joke right afterwards. i can't stand him. i know that it's implied that he has a twisted view on women from having abusive women in his life (his mom and his ex who he punched) BUT STILL. he's so lucky he's fictional and hot.
the fact that we're able to pick up on the fact that it's a "crazy coincidence" that he continues the whore jokes UGHHHHH HE HAS BEEN PLAYING US FROM THE STAAAAAARTT
Gojo got upset at something from Sukuna's party, he didn't want you to call yourself a whore all of a sudden, Sukuna seems to have believed that was your actual job, and you remember how pissed Gojo seemed as he thought about you sleeping with Sukuna- 
Holy fuck. Are the two connected somehow? Is something going on? What does Gojo owe Sukuna? Does Sukuna know you only slept with him as payment to clear Gojo's debt? Is-
GIRL YOU WERE ALMOST THERE!!!! YOU ALMOST HAD IT!!!
┏━━━
A/N > I love teasing in my narration by nearly spoiling things 😹
┗━━━
---
seriously though, these chapters killed me. the official end obliterated my heart. it's so fucking bittersweet i want to scream at the top of a high building. the reader ends up happy and with someone she loves, which is fantastic for her. she deserves that after everything she went through. Choso treats her so, so well.
but Gojo. with the theories i have, i feel horrible. i was so harsh towards him as a die hard Choso girly but these endings changed me. i just hope i'm right.
the fact that his healing journey is harsher than ours makes this ending sting so much. he's healed, and you can see it with his demeanor from the call and the way he interacted with the reader.
we were always made aware of the way he looked at us such deep attachment. the initial gleam shows that he's happy to see us, but that he's not reliant on us for his happiness anymore. he's finding that on his own, and it's a grueling process for him. i wished the reader gave him a hug, but that would probably make me feel even worse.
┏━━━
A/N> He gave her a lil side hug (with his arm over her shoulder) & was resting his head on hers at the end if that makes you feel any better 😅
┗━━━
"Through my blackmailing, I fell for you but I also did it because I loved you from the start." i'm gonna throw up bro i'm so sad. i'm proud of his growth. his obsession was so, so strong but he always prioritized the reader's happiness over himself. i know that being self-sacrificial is so core to his personality but it doesn't make it suck any less. i'm devastated. i started blasting mitski in the car on my way to work after reading this.
i thought i was ready for the journal burning. i was so ready for this tie to be severed, for them to finally move on. but i failed to realize that it could ultimately mean a life without each other. it makes sense as to why, but it still sucks.
kami i need that poly ending before i cry my eyes out at 4 am rn. you know i can't handle angst, but bittersweet endings lowkey hurt me even more. i need all my babies to be happy. i desperately need it.
but that alt ending... fuck. in a horrible, sick, and twisted way, i'm relieved. i'm a Choso girly from the bottom of my heart but i can't let this Gojo go omfg. even if he shows up for one more chapter, i think i'll be alright. BUT IT BETTER NOT BE FOR DEATH KAMI!!!! I HAVE A FEW EXCERPTS THAT SUGGEST DEATH FLAGS BUT I AM SIMPLY NOT LOOKING AT THEM. DON'T DO THIS TO ME KAMIIIIIII. i need this boy to be frolicking in a field of flowers or something. my heart can't take this.
┏━━━
A/N> I know I reference death a lot but that’s just to add a sense of how dramatic the characters are 🫶
┗━━━
---
okay, time for my mind-fucky theory. pls bare with me. if it wasn't obvious by my last post, i'm 100% on board with the theory that Sukuna's blackmailing Gojo, which started this whole thing. but the thing that is getting me is how this all connects. i have some assumptions that could make sense, but there are a handful of gaps. here's my thought process;
Sukuna's blackmailing Gojo by using his obsession/love against him.
we are already familiar with the fact that Gojo has liked the reader for years. there was a chapter where Gojo mentioned that it started off as a "crush" but he was so oblivious to his own obsession up until the reader mentioned it to him. it's to the point that he didn't understand what was wrong with the idea of hurting people for the reader. who's to say that Sukuna didn't catch him in some sort of heinous act regarding the reader like stalking?
┏━━━
A/N > You’re cooking with this one and I almost, almost had to go get the fire extinguisher :D
┗━━━
Gojo didn't understand the difference between love and obsession until later on in the story. this would be consistent with the implication that Gojo just loved her so deeply that his morals were askew as we have yet to find out how far his love goes.
what if Sukuna caught him in the act of doing god knows what, and brought up the fact that if the reader found out about this, that she'd get super freaked out and would do everything she can to get away from him (considering probably barely knew each other, if at all, at this point). but why would Sukuna devise such a plan over a money bribe? well, Sukuna's already revealed to be wealthy, and maybe he was bored. the same line that Gojo kept repeating to the reader whenever she questioned him as to why he did it. what if Gojo asked Sukuna why he's blackmailing him, and he said the exact same thing; "I was bored." we see how much Sukuna mirrors Gojo's speech by calling the reader "sweetheart" often, what if Gojo did the same thing? 
┏━━━
A/N > Gojo & Sukuna do have a few parallels in this story & they will be addressed more in the sequel.
┗━━━
we wondered in chapter 23 how Gojo reaches out to these men to ensure their debt is "paid," but considering how oblivious everyone else on the list is to Gojo owing them anything, it would make sense that he only reports to Sukuna as he is ordered to do so. but two things stumped me on this theory overall.
the reader said that she used to party a lot and get involved with boys before Gojo. if he was stalking her for so long, why did he wait so long to approach her?
what specifically would be the blackmail that Sukuna has on Gojo?
regarding the first point, it's been mentioned that Gojo has been "scared of women" and was shy when it came to approaching the reader. he knew of her for so long, but was able to constantly slip under her radar. considering how much of a pervert he is, it wouldn't have been surprising for him to sneak around and watch in on the reader hooking up with other guys. after all, these guys were probably complete strangers to him and all he cared about was you. remember how Gojo was basically able to tune out his own best friend, Suguru, when the reader was hooking up with him in their living room? it wouldn't be wild to assume that he was able to do the same for your other hookups as he spied on you.
to connect this with second point, what if Sukuna caught Gojo being a peeping tom on the reader during a party hook-up? while being so distracted in the act of spying, Sukuna spots him. the reader wouldn't be alright with the fact that someone who's barely an acquaintance (if that, depending on the time this occurred) to her has been perving around and watching her have sex without her consent. she would do anything to get away from Gojo, and of course that would crush him. Gojo tried to buy Sukuna's silence by any means necessary. so, Sukuna generated a list of people that he and Gojo mutually knew for the reader to fuck. the reasoning for it would be the fact that Gojo has to sit through the process of having the girl he likes fuck a bunch of guys besides him, and the fact that Gojo knew all these men would make it sting more. plus, he has a reputation for hookups. (chapter 8)
┏━━━
A/N > You’re like RIGHT there with it and yet not there at the same time omg 😟
┗━━━
but why would Gojo agree to this deal with Sukuna, and why would he also go with the method of blackmailing the reader? it's basically a guarantee that the reader would be scared away regardless. but again, we could recall that Shoko mentioned that he was too "scared of women" to approach the reader at first. this was his chance to finally approach her. plus, "once that video is gone, there is no excuse he'll have to be around you." (chapter 8)
---
but the more i thought of this reasoning for the two points, the more bizarre it felt. so what if instead of Gojo being a peeping tom, it was Sukuna. we get so many hints that Sukuna has eyes and intel everywhere. we get an indirect implication of this when he called us out for rolling our eyes during our phone call with him. yes, it could be completely by chance, but it's still a great hint that he "sees everything" and "knows everything." we get an even bigger hint towards this in the alt ending when he directly references The F*ck List.
┏━━━
A/N > Others have taken note of how Sukuna knew she rolled her eyes but trust me, that’s just to show that Sukuna knows the reader’s body language more than he’s let on & paid attention to her a lot during the time they were together. 
┗━━━
it wouldn't be too far fetched to assume that he has some shady videos taken of people without his consent, some possibly acquired through other people (like how Gojo was revealed to have sent Sukuna the video of the reader from the first chapter). what if Gojo caught Sukuna with the video, threatened him to delete it, and Sukuna counterthreatened to have it be sent and posted everywhere. it would be highly ironic, but consistent with the way that Gojo and Sukuna practically mirror each other at times. the reasoning for the list choices would still be the same for this theory, too.
---
my citations for these theories ☝️🤓
“You once asked me if I love you because I blackmailed you or if I blackmailed you because I love you and my answer is both,” Gojo confesses as he turns to meet your gaze, “Through my blackmailing, I fell for you but I also did it because I loved you from the start.” - Chapter 56
loved you from the start; his obsession has been consistent from the start (supports Gojo being a peeping tom theory) or he has always had a deep concern for you (supports him wanting to stop Sukuna from spreading blackmail of you instead).
“I’ve sacrificed everything for you, y’know.” 
“How? What’s everything that you’ve sacrificed, hm?” 
“You. I sacrificed the woman I love to make her happy.” Gojo admits, and of all he’s said thus far, that feels like the truest statement. 
“I could’ve been happy with you.” You remind him. 
He laughs, “Yeah well, I’m an idiot.” 
You scoff, “That’s all you have to say?” 
“Yup.” - Chapter 56
is he an idiot for being a peeping pervert instead of just approaching you normally? maybe. how does this make her happy? she ends up finding love through Choso, through the list, through the blackmail.
But deleting the video means ... he has no more leverage over you and can't force you to help him with the hole he's dug for himself. -  Chapter 8
the hole being the blackmail set against him by Sukuna.
Gojo's behind you cursing at himself for being unable to tell you the truth. 
He's so scared that you'll never help him without the blackmail and, well, he has every right to be because you're pretty sure that if it weren't for those videos he has over your head, you wouldn't be doing any of this. - Chapter 9
the videos he's referencing is the original video from chapter 1 and the fake video he lied about with Suguru, but he can't tell the reader the truth because it's too twisted and risky (supports Gojo peeping tom theory).
He silences himself in thought. There are so many ways he could go about answering such a question but the possibilities of how you may react are endless. Plus, you're drunk and if he's going to admit or explain anything to you, it'll be while you're sober. 
"Because..." Gojo's voice gets so quiet that you almost don't catch what he says, "...I don't have any other choice." - Chapter 21
if he didn't go through with his list, Sukuna would have went through with Gojo's blackmail, thus resulting in either you getting as far away from Gojo as soon as possible or Sukuna's video being sent around.
He let something slip abruptly, "W-Wish I c-could tell you everything, sweets..." 
Your brows furrow at that. 
Are you missing something here? - Chapter 22
YES GIRL!!!! SUKUNA'S BEHIND THE WHOLE LIST, HE'S BEHIND THE BLACKMAIL GIRLYPOP
"Anything," Gojo says, meeting your gaze. He's so serious that it's almost dark the way he looks at you, "I'd do anything for you." - Chapter 29
"I meant it when I said I'd do anything for you." 
You follow his motions and then end up right back in his arms, "Right..." 
"I'd sacrifice the very thing I love just to see you happy." Gojo claims proudly. 
You scoff, "Thought' I was the thing you loved?" 
"You are." 
His words bewilder you, "Then that makes no sense." 
"It won't." Gojo shrugs. - Chapter 29
🧍‍♀️
anything. even if it means putting your body, heart, mind, and career on the line. directly supports the theory that Sukuna initially had blackmail on the reader.
"We're the same, y'know..." He suddenly says, his voice breaking again, "We both want someone so terribly bad but our situations prohibit us from getting that person." 
"You could've prevented all this though..." 
Gojo sniffles and you feel a drop of wetness slide down his cheek and slip against your palm. The man was crying? Why? - Chapter 30
this whole time we've been told that Gojo and the reader share more similarities than the reader realizes. what Gojo is to the reader, the reader is to Choso. while Choso now knows of the men that the reader slept with, he doesn't know why. he doesn't know about you being blackmailed. you know that you had to sleep with these men. you don't know why. you didn't know it was because of Gojo being blackmailed.
"For loving me, Satoru. It's not a crime," You say, mocking a comment he made to you earlier, "You're allowed to love me. So, for that, and that only, I forgive you." 
Those words healed so many more wounds in his heart than you realized. It was like that was all he ever needed to hear. If Gojo's mistake was loving you and that's what caused this, then you forgive him. 
If in some twisted way, his feelings started the list, you forgive him.
COME ON NOW.
There’s so much going unspoken but the two of you knew what either was saying, you understood each other more than either of you realized. - Chapter 35
“Well,” Gojo sighs heavily and then draws your hands off his face, leaning down to you a bit, “Sometimes, sacrifices need to be made in exchange for one’s happiness.” 
“Are you telling me that all this was for the greater good?” You quiz as you raise a curious brow. 
“Something like that, yeah,” He shrugs. - Chapter 45
You tell him, “If I had one wish, it’d be that you did that from the beginning.” 
Gojo opens his mouth to say something but then he swallows his words down. He nearly fucked up. 
“All you had to do was talk to me,” Your shoulders raise into a shrug as you move a hand to the doorknob, “Things could’ve been different if you did.” 
“Even if I’ve been obsessed with you since the beginning?” He questions and he’s stepping closer to you again. He can’t possibly wrap his head around that possibility- 
You laugh a bit, “Especially if you were obsessed from the beginning,” You didn’t know it but that statement right there made the man feel as though his world was falling apart, loads of regret tumbling over him as he stares at you with wide eyes, “Satoru I think you forgot but, before all this started, aside from Shoko… I was lonely.” 
Gojo’s throat goes dry and he fails to form a response to that, “I…” 
“If you had just talked to me one time, and more than a hey or how are you,” The way your eyes soften, a slim sheer gloss of tears coating your gaze as you speak to him, “I would’ve fallen for you.” 
He grits his teeth, “Don’t tell me that.” 
“But it’s true.” You say. 
And just like that, Gojo was crumbling all over again. If only you knew how much he regretted everything after hearing you say that. - Chapter 46
if he had just spoke to the reader before all of this, maybe she wouldn't have gone to those parties, hooked up with those people, and caused whatever kind of blackmail Sukuna had on Gojo (or on her).
He wishes he could take it all back, his feelings for you included. If only he could go back and stop himself from ever being curious about you. That’s what started it after all. Because, at the end of the day, Gojo knew who you were before you knew who he was— hell, even before Shoko knew who you were. - Chapter 53
then what is the timeline of his obsession starting? has it been before Gojo? could his blackmail have taken place even before Shoko introduced you two, adding to the weight of the threat that Sukuna held over Gojo's head (regarding the peeping tom theory).
┏━━━
A/N > The timeline on Gojo’s interest, not obsession just yet, on the reader will be addressed in the sequel so this’ll be answered there <3
┗━━━
---
but there were certain parts that stumped me and my theories so i have some weird reasonings around them;
It's selfish of him and seriously fucked up but, he's said it before and he'll say it over and over again-- you're all he has. He made promises to everyone on that list, promises of delivering a woman to them at some point, and of course, he couldn't convince anyone he knew to do such a thing. 
So again, the situation with you just happened to be a coincidence. 
The problem is that Gojo hates that it's you. He hates that you're the one he ended up doing this to. - Chapter 8
Gojo's known to be a silly guy so it could make sense that he actually did promise these guys hookups for reasons unrelated to his blackmail. after all, he does have a reputation for getting people hookups. the coincidence is that Sukuna now has dirt on Gojo and wants to toy with him. by making the reader sleep with them the guys he coincidentally owes hookups to, he fulfills his role/reputation and relieves his debt at the same time. two birds, one stone.
┏━━━
A/N > As we later learn that some of the “debt” Satoru claimed to have isn’t real, we can also infer that his reputation & the promises he’s made to these men were done out of coincidence. Take Toji for example; tell me you can’t see an interaction between him & Gojo where Gojo gets a bad grade and wants to get it up so he taunts his professor with the idea of getting him a hookup & Toji would laugh it off considering Gojo’s reputation ;)
┗━━━
another thing that stumped me is why Gojo got so worked up with the reader referring herself as a whore, and the connection to Sukuna. my delulu reasoning is that once Sukuna threatened Gojo with blackmail by either of the two theories/methods i mentioned, Sukuna casually referred to the reader as a whore. that caused a major fight between the two, possibly even getting physical (which can refer back to the implication that Gojo has hurt people for the reader).
the fight could have increased the tension and severity of the situation, so Sukuna decides to add Choso to the list knowing how easily attached Choso gets. in chapter 5, the reader and Gojo were discussing the list and Choso specifically. Gojo was even noted to be relieved when the reader had mentioned that they'll just have to hope that Choso doesn't get attached, as he obviously holds deep feelings for the reader. Sukuna knows that by going through with the blackmail with Choso involved, Gojo most likely will not end up with the reader if Choso get attached and the reader reciprocates those feelings.
also, the counterargument that Sukuna and Gojo are actually friends/allies in this situation just doesn't sit well with me. it would make for a crazy twist but it just feels too out of character for Gojo. but then again, how would Sukuna specifically know about The F*ck List? but idk, it just feels so wrong to me. maybe i have too much faith in Gojo lmfao. after all, he has consistently shown a great dislike towards the guy since chapter 23. but maybe it's my denial speaking. i really don't want to think of Satoru going through this whole arc only for it to reveal that he truly is a piece of shit. pls don't do this to my pookie my heart cannot handle it </3
┏━━━
A/N > Remember, Gojo is a good actor & you go a long period of time in the book not realizing he’s not as much of a villain as he pretends to be 😉 
┗━━━
there's that moment after the reader fucked Sukuna that still messes with my brain. with my theories, my brain's thinking that he contemplated on collecting even more blackmail on the reader. for what reason? idk, to be an ass? to torment Gojo further and add more to his blackmail? but maybe he decided not to because he already has plenty of blackmail on the reader (if the theory of Sukuna having a video of her from way back then is true) and fucking her knowingly made Gojo pissed considering all the dirt Sukuna has.
so why can't Gojo tell her the truth now? why does he want to wait years in advance? maybe he's hoping that by that time, not only will you forget and not care about the situation overall, but maybe Sukuna will forget all about it as well. the chances of Sukuna holding on to the reader's blackmail for that long is slim and the reader would most likely be in a situation where she is completely separated from Sukuna depending on her job and living situation with Choso. the stakes are lower than if he were to reveal everything to you now, at a moment where your life is still so uncertain. it would go against his wish for you to end up happy.
┏━━━
A/N > Maybe Gojo doesn’t tell her the truth because he can’t, just as he said 🌚 Perhaps he’s not allowed to yet. After all, why would Sukuna even tell the reader he made the list in the end? ^.^ Just some food for thought!
┗━━━
---
regarding the future of TFL... fuck, bro. i have no fucking idea. i'm too caught up in the (presumed) past. i'm mourning fr. i love this fic sooooo fucking much. whenever you decide to pick up on the sequel, i will be there. if you choose to publish anything else in the meantime, i will be there. thanks for such a fun and memorable read, Kami. i'm excited to bookbind this soon 🤍🤍🤍 now, i need to watch blue lock to shove these feelings down.
yap fin (for now)
-☃️
Tumblr media
A/N > I love you sosoosooooo much for this. These theories are like reading an entirely new fanfic sometimes except, I know all the answers & what’s going to happen next, which only makes me more excited ^.^ Thank you for taking the time to make this, thank you for reading, thank you for supporting, just, THANK YOU.
This right here is exactly what I write for; people like you :)
To the others reading this breakdown & theory, thank ☃️anon because she’s a damn godsend & ilhsm ^.^ (definitely showing favoritism rn, sorry not sorry, ily all I swear)
Edit; Since you’re watching Blue Lock, I can’t wait to bring my Shidou fanfic here because a lot of the drama in TFL has inspo from that fic, which I wrote first ^.^ & I could totally see you enjoying it because not only is it a childhood friends to lovers than enemies & back to lovers troupe BUT it also includes Itoshi Sae x reader which ofc, adds hella drama :))
Tumblr media
P.S. It’s two am as I finally post this and omg sorry it took me a while, I wanted to answer other anons first before unpacking this badboy, again, tysm!!
162 notes ¡ View notes
queenie-avenue ¡ 1 year ago
Text
Tumblr media
Don't run. He'll catch you anyway.
💌 ⤻ THE ACADEMIC RIVAL, SEO MIN-JUN
—> what happens when you try to escape him?
⤝ reader is gender neutral, dark themes, invasion of privacy, taking photos without consent, bullying, manipulation, slightly suggestive themes, typical yandere red flagginess (duh), min-jun is just a freak honestly, not too detailed but a small fic, besides straight up gore I think this is the darkest thing I've ever written
notes: @moyazami , i am so sorry, but i lost your ask. thank god, i took a screenshot before i deleted it. you are such a sweetheart. thank you for the ask, and keep them coming! i want to do the first imagine, but don't worry, i'll also do the second one at a later date! honestly wasn't sure to write out the part where he approaches you again but if anyone wants it, drop a ask, honestly-
Tumblr media
The fact that you left was laughable to Min-Jun.
At first, he was shocked that you had actually left, and the reason was clearly because of him. Second, he was sad knowing he was the reason he would not see you anymore. Third, he was angry that you had left him. Who gave you permission to leave? Certainly not him.
Fourth, he projected that anger into scheming.
Sure, you left for another school. However, did you forget? Min-Jun's entire family was rather influential, perhaps not as much as the Samsung family in Korea, but certainly able to pull a few strings here and there. His entire family was full of ministers, civil workers, and some even celebrities with the power to topple the entertainment industry. Did you really think that transferring to another school would allow you to run from his grasp?
"Are you that idiotic?" He whispered under his breath as he schemed.
You leaving the academy was like inciting war and he was going to bring out the full arsenal to pull you back into his arms.
He would hire a private detective to comb through every aspect of your life; relishing in the intimate information the detective would give him. He honestly felt a bit bad about spreading it. Not because he worried for you, but because he wanted to keep all these secrets to himself, claiming ownership of you and every thought you had in the sickest manner. Still, he supposed he could part with this knowledge. After all, when he got you back, he'd be able to learn more about you.
As said before, rumours spread like wildfire. A simple strike of a match is all he needed to turn into a massacre.
Soon, not only people from your school but from your neighbourhood began to whisper about you behind your back. They talked about your nature, some even going as far as coming up with fake rumours about you just to entertain the masses.
It was hell on earth for you. Worse than when Min-Jun tormented you.
Then, it was only one person — a boy whom you had no idea was your academic rival — but now, it was your entire community that had turned against you.
It got worse when pictures of you leaked. How had someone managed to take so many pictures of you like that?
Some immature students even stapled your embarrassing moments to the school board, leaving you to clean them up during lunchtime.
Min-Jun had some friends in that new school you went to, so of course, he heard everything that happened to you. His poor rival, you must be so hurt by all the things happening to you!
Serves you right for leaving me, Min-Jun thought as he looked at the photos of you crying when you thought nobody was looking.
Just a bit more, and he would intervene. He wanted you to feel the pain he felt when you left him. Maybe about a week more, and he would come to your rescue one of these days.
For now, he would enjoy the delicious tears that streamed down your adorable cheeks.
Tumblr media
240 notes ¡ View notes
erinwantstowrite ¡ 1 month ago
Text
commissions interest :3
hey y'all! i haven't spoken about it much yet (i think i made like one post a while back?), but i am figuring out commissions at the moment. i've gotten a few asks about it here and there but didn't know what to say yet. well, now i have an idea of what to say, so i'm making a first post here to test the waters
please note that it'll be my first time doing something like this, so it might be a bumpy start. I hope everyone understands! the first round of comms i won't be taking on a big load (I'm thinking 5 slots) so i can be sure i'm getting it right. i'm thinking of starting commissions in November-December this year, and maybe have 2 rounds. if all goes well with the first round, then i might increase the amount of slots for the second round. we'll have to see how it goes. (the last thing i wanna do is get too big for my britches and rush/overload myself, and therefore mess it up for anyone who commissions me)
i'll have more specific commission details later in another post if there's enough interest here. i would also like to add that during commission batches, they will be my main focus because it is a responsibility that needs to be taken more seriously. however, i will be making a conscious effort not to forget my writing, art on the side, or posting on here. even if you see me slowing down, that doesn't mean i've stopped. this is my passion and i've been very fortunate for what i've been able to do so far. these comms will be making sure that i can still enjoy doing what i've been sharing with everyone while still being able to take care of myself and my people <3 thank you for your understanding :)
53 notes ¡ View notes
thelov3lybookworm ¡ 1 year ago
Text
Remember me? (Part 10)
Summary: Under the Mountain, Y/n met the High Lord of the Night Court, Rhysand. She was scared of him, but soon she found out that he wasn't who he pretended to be. Despite her efforts at not falling in love with him, she fails. It's not that bad as he loves her back.
But now he's gone, and she's left alone with nothing.
Except for a very adorable reminder of him.
•○●⛦●○•
Tw: secret pregnancy, none more that I can think of, so let me know if I need to add anything.
A/n: hello babies! Please ignore any mistakes if you see one because I duchy have time to edit!
Anyways, I might write a readers pov of what was going on towards the end 😏
Enjoy!
(I'll edit the links in later 😉❣️)
•○🌑○•
Feyre's pov.
She chased after the two giggling boys, a smile on her face as she ignored the constant hammering on the mental shields she had around her mind. Laughed as she ignored the constant tugging on the bond that connected her to a male far away from her, the distance of courts separating two weeping hearts.
It had been a month since Feyre had winnowed into the Autumn Court Palace's doorstep, the sentries guarding the huge wood entrance startling at the sudden and impossible appearance of the high lady of the night court, tears streaming down her face, clutching the hand of a grinning three year old boy.
•○●⛦●○•
The night court heir looked around in wonder, his eyes going wide at the trees surrounding the magnificent Palace, his grin fading into a little o at the sheer size of it, a place that was gigantic to the little boy's eyes compared to the house he was used to.
Feyre sniffled, trying to stop the tears and be strong for her little boy who had yet to realise his mother was crying.
The sentries stood at attention after their initial shock faded, an armoured male stalking forward at the commotion, his lips parting as he realised that Feyre had winnowed directly inside the wards.
"Did you break the wards, cursebreaker?" The male, who Feyre assumed was the captain of the Guard, spat the title out like it was a curse, something to be ashamed of.
And Feyre was beginning to think that maybe it was.
Feyre had just opened her mouth to respond, to clear any misunderstandings, but another voice beat her to it.
"The high lord gave her permission to enter."
The male froze, his head lowering in deference as he turned to look at the owner of the voice.
She stood in a simple silk robe, her shoulders thrown back, the chilled night breeze gently whispering through her unbound hair, her cheecks red.
Y/n.
It seemed like a month in the autumn court had done her good.She looked more beautiful, making it unable to look away from her. Or maybe she had just become more confident, the worries weighing down her shoulder gone as she stood straight backed, her clear and bright eyes unblinking and unflinching as she stared down at the guard whose head was still lowered.
"The cursebreaker you are talking to is a friend, and you would do well to remember that."
Finally, Feyre looked away from Y/n long enough to glance at the new arrival, and had to resist the urge to cock an eyebrow.
Eris stood next to Y/n, his eyes blazing, hair sticking up in places as if he had been tugging at it and then hastily smoothed it back. He was shirtless, leaving all the mouth watering expanse of smooth, pale skin covering the rippling muscle underneath on display.
Though that was not what made Feyre curious.
The hand he had wrapped around Y/n's shoulders was.
Feyre met the eyes of her friend, who glanced at Eris for a long moment before shrugging out of his grip. He reluctantly lowered his arm, hurt flashing over his russet eyes before he covered it up.
Now Feyre was intrigued. Though the drilling of all the details Feyre wanted to know from Y/n would have to wait.
"Uncle Eris!" Nyx giggled, sprinting towards the red headed male, who tore his eyes from Y/n, grinning and opening his arms for the boy.
"Hello Nyx. How are you?"
"I'm good! Where is Fin?"
"He is sleeping. Come, I will take you to his room. I have already placed a bed next to his, so you can sleep in his room."
Nyx squealed happily as Eris carried him away with a last look at Y/n.
Feyre turned to Y/n, who approached her with a sad smile.
"I had hoped this day would never come." Y/n whispered, reaching out to grasp Feyre's hand.
"Me too."
•○●⛦●○•
Fin turned a corner, screeching in happiness, and Nyx followed.In the whole month Feyre and Nyx had been away from the night court, Nyx had never once asked about his father, so busy was he in spending his time with Fin.
His brother.
Feyre also followed the little boys, skidding to a stop when her eyes landed on a sight that she would describe as... funny.
Eris had his head practically shoved down a vase, inspecting the flowers potted in it, while Y/n stood a few feet away, caressing her fingers along the wall next to her in the alcove she was standing in, as if the wall felt lonely and she was soothing it with a gentle touch.
And both their cheeks were red, and the only way to describe the color was the red of an angry fire.
Y/n turned to her son and his brother giving them a dazzling smile as they ran up to her.
"Auntie Y/n! Do you want to play with us?"
Fin jumped eagerly at Nyx's question, and Y/n nodded, sparing a glance at Eris, who still couldn't find the brain he had dropped into the vase.
"Come, we have a few hours before dinner time, so we can play."
The children cheered, then grabbed each of Y/n's hands and began dragging her away.
With a last glance at Eris, who now stared at the retreating form of Y/n with a look Feyre couldn't decipher, she followed the kids and her friend.
She would have to pester Y/n for details of what was going on between her and Eris soon.
•○🌑○•
Taglist: @holb32 @awoa1 @cleverzonkwombatsludge @luvmoo @we-were-beautiful @eerievixen @zoe2 @fussel9913 @j-pendragonx @thesnugglingduck @jesssicapaniagua @devilsnight @esposadomd @littleffawn @mandowhatnow @bubybubsters @eos-princess @nightless @bigcreatorwombatdreamer @princesslolaasworld @asemkta @cat-or-kitten @txzii @bunnyredgirl @theofficialmadman @leeknows-wife @aria-chikage @amygdtjhddzvb @azriels-mate123 @inky-clover @kemillyfreitas @12358 @justdreamstars @cuethedepession @princessvesta @fides25 @nocasdatsgay @acourtofbatboydreams @stained-glass-eyes0708 @glaciuswduo @wallacewillow0773638 @cassie6392 @quackitysdrugdealer @txzii
254 notes ¡ View notes
nyarlathotep-thecrawlingchaos ¡ 5 months ago
Text
Oh look another chapter
We'll I'll be damned.
Mihawk has yet to grace us with his presence here, but I always love writing Garp's unhinged unpredictable ass, and I'm quite enjoying portraying Bogard for the first time as well. There's just something about a tall mysterious dude with a signature hat that I'll always enjoy.
A few notes this time:
I've determined that Mihawk would be around 28/29 years old in this timeline.
I'll be operating under the assumption that zoan-type devil fruit users aren't able to communicate with actual animals.
Can't find any actual source regarding Bogard's Marine rank. There is speculation that, by his coat, he is likely a vice admiral himself in the canon timeline. I'm operating under the assumption here then that, as Garp's right hand, he was likely promoted after Garp, so at this point in time I'm going with Rear Admiral, one rank below Garp. If anyone knows otherwise for a fact, please tell me so I can correct it, because I'm a chronic canon-junkie.
Reader is 21 years old; having consumed a devil fruit at six years old, and fifteen years having since passed.
It's not specified exactly when Mihawk took up residence on Kuraigana Island, from what I can tell. I could be wrong, and there could be some slight deviation from canon in that respect, but I'll let that slide this time for the sake of narrative. At this point he's not necessarily living there, but he has already used it as a hideout and is considering the idea. So while it's not exclusively his territory yet, he's essentially the only person who's bothered with the place.
This is looking like it's going to be more than three chapters for sure. Maybe five or six? I can at least promise that Mihawk will be in the next chapter.
Inserting obligatory Mihawk gif for tax reasons
Tumblr media
dreamy sigh
what was I doing...?
o right uhhhhm
Flight Risk
Young!Mihawk x Marine!AFAB!Reader
Ch. 2 of like five or something idk
Previous Chapter Link , Next Chapter Link
SFW for now, but not in later chapters
Possible trigger warning for bullying. Possible future trigger warnings for imprisonment, mild torture (definitely psychological, maybe physical)
Tags: Enemies to lovers, eventually NSFW, idk maybe more later
Word Count: 3,794
♫♬Shotgun Shoes — The Fratellis♬♫Well I don't need your or your psychosisI can get to crazy by myself
Tumblr media
You weren’t given any further details just yet. At your firm acceptance of what was perhaps the most insane idea you had ever heard, Garp immediately placed a call back to headquarters to inform Fleet Admiral Sengoku, quite smugly, that he would be going forward with Project Macaw. Still feeling borderline delirious, you barely heard yourself saying something about how gray parrots weren’t technically classified as macaws before Bogard, pinching at the bridge of his nose, jerked his head toward the door, indicating for you to follow him out of the office. It was difficult to truly wrap your head around the gravity of the situation yet. None of it quite seemed real.
Bogard pulled the door shut after them in the hallway outside, muffling Garp’s jovial gloating. For a long moment Bogard frowned down at you, arms crossed, clearly far less pleased. Several seconds passed before expelled an irritated sigh.
“You’ll need to pack your belongings immediately, cadet. Come on,” he said, turning on his heel and heading down the hall, not bothering to glance back and see if you were following. You had to force yourself to move, your feet feeling as if they had been replaced with lead weights. “Should any of your comrades ask, you are to tell them no more than that you’re being transferred to another base for reasons you are unable to disclose.”
“Can…I tell anyone where?” you asked. He did glance at you at this, his gaze sharp. “Not—just—my mom. She writes to me every week.”
“You are being transferred to a base in the Grand Line, where you will be receiving special training to hone your devil fruit powers,” he said curtly. You nodded quickly, not keen on pressing the subject too hard when the officer was already clearly annoyed. “She will be able to write you once we’ve arrived there. Should you release any information to anyone regarding the nature of your mission, you will be discharged from service at best.”
“A…and���at worst…?”
“You could be charged with treason and executed.”
You opened your mouth to respond, but all that left your throat at first was a strangled sort of squeak. The matter-of-fact way he had just told you that letting any details at all slip could lead to your untimely death didn’t help the surreal feeling that this was all a ridiculous dream. After pulling in a deep breath, you managed to force out weakly, “Understood, sir.”
Silence fell as you followed Bogard in the direction of barracks. Most of the other cadets would still be in the mess hall for dinner at this hour, and that left you with at least the comfort that you wouldn’t have to contend with too many questions—or too much taunting. The closer you drew to your destination, the more that surreal feeling seemed to float away to be replaced by the horrific weight of reality. You had been enlisted for only a few short months, made into a laughingstock when your fellow cadets discovered your devil fruit powers, and now you were being carted off to use those exact powers to assist in bringing down one of the deadliest men in the world.
A small part of you felt a degree of pride at the prospect that, for once, someone thought you might be remotely useful, but that part was a tiny whisper among the screaming terror occupying your head. Even once you reached the blessedly empty barracks and set to quickly and haphazardly packing your few personal belongings, as Bogard loomed silently beside the door waiting with his arms crossed, you couldn’t shake Garp’s reasoning for all of this coming down to that one ridiculous claim.
Let’s face it—pirates like parrots.
You swallowed as you stuffed your spare uniforms into a trunk, glancing toward Bogard, drawing up enough resolve to speak to the tall, imposing officer.
“I…is the vice admiral always so…”
“Barking mad?” he offered dully, and your mouth snapped shut. You weren’t sure whether to agree with such a harsh statement about such a high ranking Marine. Bogard saved you the trouble. “Yes. He is.”
“Ah. Right. Great.” You swallowed, turning your attention back to packing your belongings. You had nearly finished now and there would be plenty of time for questions later once you had gathered your thoughts. Right now, it was better that you try to finish before—
The door to the barracks opened and you froze for a moment in folding your dress uniform, your eyes darting to the door as a few other cadets filed in. They spotted you immediately, taking no notice of Bogard’s statuesque form standing to the side, already snickering as they approached the side of your bunk.
“What’s this? They finally decide to send you packing, bird brain?”
“Figures. We missed you at dinner. Brought ya some snacks.”
You only rolled your eyes as one of them pulled a small pack of crackers from their pocket, opened it, and crumbled them over top of the contents of your trunk.
“Aw, cat got your tongue, Polly?” You still held your tongue as he pulled your trunk across your bunk, rifling through it.”Where the hell are you going, anyway?”
“Your fellow cadet is being transferred to the Grand Line at the request of Vice Admiral Garp.”
The three of them froze when Bogard spoke up behind them, before slowly turning their heads to look over their shoulders. You had to bite your tongue to keep from laughing as they all immediately turned around and stood at attention. Bogard didn’t budge an inch, arms still crossed, still leaning against the stone wall beside the door, his sharp eyes flashing between each of them from beneath the brim of his hat.
“I’m afraid none of you are of high enough rank to be provided further details,” he said in a clipped tone. “Nor likely will you ever be, should you continue to treat your own brethren with such blatant disrespect.”
They remained speechless as you closed your trunk, looking rather as if their souls had evacuated the premises of their bodies. Bogard stepped away from the wall, straightening out his posture as you dragged your trunk off of the bunk mattress.
“Come along, cadet.” He was already turning toward the door. “Garp doesn’t like to be kept waiting.”
You hurried after him without a glance back at them, dragging your trunk along behind you. You only looked back over your shoulder once you were several feet down the hall—and, at the sight of the idiots standing in the door, whispering amongst themselves and watching your departure, you quickly turned your gaze forward again. Even with your things now packed, none of it seemed real. As much as you would have loved to derive some pleasure from their stunned expressions, you found it impossible with the way your head was spinning.
You remained silent the entire way back to the door of the office. Bogard instructed you to wait there before stepping inside and shutting the door behind him, and you could do nothing more than stand there with a dumbfounded look on your face as you stood there in the empty hallway, still wondering what the hell sort of mess you had gotten yourself into.
How it all stemmed back to that day fifteen years ago, when you and a couple of your friends had ventured out to look for a crow with an injured wing that had escaped from your mother’s aviary. When you found it at the edge of the woods, pecking at a strange fruit with a swirling pattern across its skin sitting at the base of a mango tree, and the three of you speculated how it might be a devil fruit and spent the afternoon daring each other to eat it after returning the bird home.
How you had been the one to finally pick the thing up and take a bite out of it to end the argument.
How nothing had happened for almost a week, until you were startled by a particularly surly cockatoo attacking your hair while you were helping feed the birds and, to your mother’s horror, promptly transformed into a gray parrot.
It had taken some time for you to learn to control your ability to transform, largely for the simple sake of not turning into a bird every time you were startled. You had found little use for the ability otherwise, apart from pulling the occasional prank on your mom or your friends. The ability to fly was definitely a perk, but apart from that it really had seemed to be an absurd ability to gain in exchange for the curse of forever being unable to come into contact with the sea.
You jolted a in surprise, startled from your thoughts when the office door opened and Bogard emerged. You had taken a seat on your trunk while you waited, looking up at him as he shut the door quietly behind him.
“Garp will be with us shortly,” he said shortly. You nodded, watching him lean against the wall next to the door, lowering the brim of his hat over his eyes and crossing his arms once more.
You lowered your own gaze to your knees, your stomach churning as your thoughts returned to the here and now. Swallowing, wringing your hands in your lap, still trying and still failing to wrap your head around the reality of all of this.
“Your abilities were leaked by Petty Officer on base.” Your breath caught when Bogard spoke up amid the silence. You glanced up, but his eyes were still concealed in the shadow of the brim of his hat. “He’s been bumped back down to the rank of Seaman as punishment for divulging confidential information.”
“O…oh.” You weren’t sure of exactly how else to respond. You had assumed that something of the sort had happened a few weeks ago, when everyone was suddenly privy to your powers. “That’s…a pity.”
“You’re not interested in who it was?” His tone remained short, level, and you lifted your eyebrows. Of course you were curious. You had wondered since it happened. But at the same time…
You shook your head, lowering your gaze again and huffing out a small sigh. “It’s not important,” you said. “I figured it would happen eventually anyway. Doesn’t really matter who spilled the beans.”
 “And you have no interest in revenge?” Your eyes shot back up to the imposing officer at his blunt question, widening.
“N…no,” you said, shaking your head quickly. “That...wouldn’t accomplish any…”
Your mouth turned down in a frown as you carefully considered your words. The past few weeks had been hell, sure. You had considered giving up more than once, going home, forgetting that you ever even bothered trying—but you had forced yourself to stick it out. You hadn’t enlisted to make friends, you had enlisted because you wanted to make the world better, safer for everyone. The same reason your father had enlisted.
“I don’t care about a few morons throwing crackers at me and calling me stupid names,” you said finally, shrugging a shoulder. “If I wanted things to be easy I wouldn’t be here. I would have stayed home and helped my mom.”
“I take it you’re close with her.” You swallowed, giving a short nod. “According to your file you have no other family. You’re aware that should you die in the line of duty, she will be—”
“I know,” you interjected before he could finish, flinching as your reminded yourself that you were speaking to a superior officer. “I—sorry, sir, I—” He waved a hand dismissively, and you heaved a sigh. “I…knew that when I enlisted. So does she. It doesn’t change anything. If I…if I die in the line of duty, at least I lived for long enough to try to make the world better.” You slowly lowered your gaze, closing your eyes. “My dad always said there was a difference between living and surviving,” you continued on quietly. “I…guess I’m starting to understand what he meant.”
“Hmm.”
His short hum betrayed no more emotion than his brief and curt manner of speaking, and it remained the only communication between you for some time. Long enough for you to realize that no matter how much you had hated enduring the endless ridicule of your fellow cadets, no matter how terrified you were of this mission, that there was no room for doubt. That you could have declined without any consequence, and you hadn’t. That given the opportunity to change your mind, you wouldn’t.
You would do everything in your power to help take down Dracule Mihawk before he could further his career of bloodshed and terror, even if it was the last thing you ever did.
“Then perhaps the old moron was right.”
You glanced up at Bogard at the quiet statement, but before you could so much as wonder what he meant, the office door flung open and Garp, the old moron himself, stepped out into the hallway. He stopped in front of you, looking down, grinning as broadly as he had when you first accepted this mission.
“On your feet, cadet.” You quickly pulled yourself to your feet, straightening your posture into a salute. He gave an amused snort at the display, clapping you on the shoulder. “We’re bound for the Grand Line.”
You had to nearly jog, dragging your trunk along behind you, to keep up with the vice and rear admirals as you wound through the corridors of the small base you had come to briefly call home over the past few months. They spoke amongst themselves in hushed tones as they walked ahead of you, occasionally glancing back to ensure you were keeping up. You mostly kept your head down, your heart racing in your chest the whole way out to the docks, onto the deck of Garp’s distinctive battleship, with its canine figurehead that so many pirates had come to fear.
You were told that the journey to the base in the Grand Line would span the better part of a month, shown around the ship, given a rundown of your duties and your new training schedule. It felt no less surreal as the ship left the dock, as you sat at the edge of your bunk in the ship barracks and stared at the opposite wall, barely registering the slow swaying of the vessel beneath your feet as it sailed west.
After a long moment, you pulled your trunk open, digging past the cracker crumbs and uniforms, finding a pad of paper and a pen, steadying your hand and your mind the best you could to write something coherent.
Hey, Mom!
How are things going? I’m being transferred to a new base for special training around my feathery little problem. I can’t really say much about it, but I’ll be sure to give you an address once I have it. It’s on the Grand Line. I’m a little nervous, but I feel like things are going to be a lot better now. Like I know what I’m really here for.
And I won’t have to deal with the idiots anymore, so it’s kind of a win either way.
It’ll take about a month to make it there. I’ll write you any time I can. Tell everyone I miss them.
Love you, and miss you most.
You signed your name at the bottom, tearing the paper off and folding it, staring down at the brief letter for a long moment before standing to make your way out of the barracks and send it off.
You hadn’t expected your duties to cease or lessen simply because you were traveling, and you were right in that assumption. Between regular daily drill and duties aboard the ship, you spent the vast majority of what would have been your free time training in both combat and studying espionage. You were expected to be awake hours earlier than the rest of the crew, to fall into your bunk hours past when everyone else had gone to bed for the evening. Most mornings you felt dead on your feet, but you persevered, reminded yourself that this was the easy part.
The hard part would be the mission itself.
Beyond exhausted at a few weeks into the journey, averaging less than six hours of sleep a night. The last thing you wanted to deal with was being unceremoniously awoken before morning.
And yet, at the sound of your name being spoken sharply, your eyes snapped open.
You squinted against the dim orange light bathing your corner of the barracks, barely registering for a moment that it wasn’t the light of the morning sun creeping in through the rounded windows. The sky outside was still inky black and speckled with stars, and you frowned as your eyes found the source of the light—a lantern. A lit lantern, which Bogard was holding up, looking no less disgruntled about being there than you were at being awake. You grunted as you rubbed your eyes, sitting up.
“What time’s it…?” you grumbled.
“Late,” he said. “Vice Admiral Garp has requested your presence on the quarterdeck. No need,” he added over you groan of protest, when you reached down toward your trunk to grab a uniform to throw on over your tank-top and shorts. “This isn’t for training.”
“What’s he want, then?” you said, grabbing a pair of sweats instead. “Does he even sleep?”
“I’ve worked alongside Garp for the better part of two decades,” said Bogard, leading the way out of the barracks. “I still have no idea what goes on in that thick skull of his most of the time.”
You couldn’t help but wonder whether anyone did.
The main deck was empty save for the handful of Marines working the graveyard shift, all but silent with the exception of the rolling waves below as the battleship cut through the relatively calm waters. You wrapped your arms around your torso when the chilly night air hit you, rubbing at your arms as Bogard gestured for you to go ahead and left you to whatever business Garp had cooked up for you. You yawned as you climbed the stairs to the quarterdeck, where you found the man standing at the port side railing, staring out toward an island in the distance.
“Kuraigana Island,” he said as you stopped next to him. “Ever heard of it, cadet?”
“Ah…no, sir,” you responded blankly, looking out at it yourself. It was difficult to gauge the distance in the dark, but it had to be at least half a mile away, if not more. The landscape appeared to be covered largely in dense forest, but standing above the dark treetops was an old castle, silhouetted in the silvery moonlight.
“I guess not many have,” he said. “It was home to a small kingdom until recently. They had little contact with the outside world so it’s hard to say what happened. Most likely a civil war wiped out all the previous residents. Only supposed inhabitants now are a race of violent primates that attack anyone who ventures into the forests.”
“O…kay,” you said, slowly, wondering where this was going.
A small part of you wondering if you were about to be dropped off on the island to see if you could fight your way through. Your ability in combat had improved over the past few weeks of grueling training, but the mental image of being surrounded by an army of angry gorillas still flashed through your mind and caused you to give a wary glance toward Garp.
His gaze remained fixed on the island.
“We’ve received a few of reports about a small vessel anchored near the shore on a handful of occasions,” he said. “One matching the description of Hitsugibune.”
You froze, your eyes widening as your gaze slowly turned back toward the island. A few weeks ago, the name would have meant nothing to you. Now that you had learned more about the target of your mission, you knew exactly what Garp was referring to—the small, coffin-shaped, one man vessel of Dracule Mihawk. You swallowed, nodding briefly when you found yourself unable to speak.
“We’re not sure what the situation is,” said Garp, “but there’s a fair chance he’s using the ruins as a hideout. I suppose if anyone could get past the apes…” He leaned forward against the railing, scratching at his beard. “Well then. Think you’re up for a test?”
Oh gods, here it comes…
“Do I have a choice?” you said, and expelled a resigned sigh at Garp’s bark of laughter. “What do I need to do, sir?”
“That’s the spirit,” he said, straightening out, crossing his arms and looking down at you with a grin. “How far d’ya think you can fly with your devil fruit powers?”
You were suddenly a great deal more awake now.
“Further than I can walk,” you said slowly, lifting an eyebrow—you weren’t sure of exactly how far, but flying expelled a great deal less energy than walking.
“In that case,” he said, gesturing toward the island, “go get us a bird’s-eye view. See if there are any signs of life. I’d focus around the castle. Avoid flying too low over the forest for obvious reasons.”
“For obvious reasons,” you repeated in agreement, grimacing—the last thing you wanted was to be snatched out of the air by a pissed off gorilla. “Right…” You rubbed the back of your neck, looking out toward the island. “Should I go right now, sir?”
“No time like the present,” he said, grinning.
There was nothing else for it, then. Garp took a step back as you transformed, shrinking down into a gray parrot on the quarterdeck of the ship. “You’re to be gone no longer than half an hour, or I’ll have no choice but to send in reinforcements,” he said, looking down at you, watching you flap your wings a few times and fly up to the railing, perching there as he relayed the orders. “Should you see Dracule Mihawk, you’ll keep your distance. Fly over and return immediately. Reconnaissance only, no contact. Understood?”
You nodded, and lifted one of your wings, moving it to your head to mime a salute. He gave a snort of laughter at the sight.
“Good bird,” he said dryly, and made a shooing motion. “Now go ahead. Get moving, cadet.”
Before a single thought of trying to find some way out of this nonsense could form in your mind, you lifted off from the port side railing, and circled around in the air until you were heading out toward Kuraigana Island.
Previous chapter link again, for your convenience
Next chapter link again, for your convenience
95 notes ¡ View notes
russellsppttemplates ¡ 1 year ago
Text
Making do (George Russell)
George moving to Monaco has a bigger impact than you anticipated
Note: english is not my first language. This is my attempt at getting back into writing, I hope this is half decent at least.
Thank you so much to everyone who likes and reblogs, your feedback is appreciated 🤍 and I'm taking requests so if you have any ideas or concepts you want to share, feel free to do so as I'll try to get to them the best I can!
my masterlist
Tw: long distance relationship
Tag list: @myloverjk-blog
"Did you have a big day today?", your friend, "Actually, let me rephrase that. How big was your day today?", she chuckled. "I finally handed in the last paperwork so HR can process my transfer from departments, so hopefully in a week or so everything will be sorted, like accesses and all that", you explained, "but it's been good, you know? I've worked a lot towards this and to finally get it, it means a lot", you said, hearing your phone beep with a notification from your boyfriend, "is it your man?", your friend asked, smiling knowingly.
"Yes, George wants to go and have dinner to celebrate", you blushed, "he just texted me the details of the reservation so I can get ready on time", you said, setting your phone down after quickly replying to him that you would be ready by the time he would pick you up back at home.
"Whenever you need to go, let me know, but for now, I have this gossip I want to tell you, you'll never believe it", she smiled, warming her hands in her cup of coffee as she told you a out the latest rumours she heard in her office.
When the time came, you both said goodbye as you made your way to your and George's shared apartment, leaving your shoes and coat on the hallway closet and heading straight to the shared bedroom, taking your clothes off so you could shower. While the dinner wasn't a fancy occasion, you still wanted to dress nice and look good since it was a celebration still. Picking the dress from your wardrobe, you fastened the delicate zipper and tied the belt, looking at your self in the mirror as you soothed out the wrinkles.
It didn't take long before you heard George arrive, the clicking of the lock on the door catching your attention as you walked to the hallway, "hey, darling", George greeted, grabbing your hand and making you do a little spin, whistling after kissing your lips, "you look gorgeous", he complimented, "are you ready to go?".
"I'll just freshen up in the bedroom and then we can get going then", George said, quickly styling his hair and spraying on some extra cologne, "even though I don't think we need this, I want to say thank you for doing this", you mumbled against his hand laced in yours, kissing his knuckles as you walked out, "you deserve to be celebrated everyday, Y/N".
.
The monegasque sun was shinning despite the cold breeze caressing your skin. You and George had gone out for a run before you both had work meetings, deciding to stop in a little cafĂŠ to have breakfast out of the house for a change.
"It's still a nice day today, maybe later tonight we can plan something, hm?", your boyfriend suggested while you sipped your juice, "That's a good idea, yes", you smiled, looking at the crescent buzz, the city becoming alive as more people got up and headed on with their days.
"You have something on your mind, I can tell", you held your hand out on the table, his fingers finding yours and playing with them, "I do, actually", George cleared his throat, "I've been thinking a lot about this recently, and with the meetings I had last week, it became a bit more obvious to me where I am standing on this. I've been waiting to tell you once I had a more set opinion and I knew how things would play out, and I obviously care about your thoughts, too. I've been thinking about moving here", he stated, his eyes looking for your immediate reaction, "and I'd like you to move here with me, too".
It had always been a conversation the minute things started getting more serious, so it wasn't a shock per se. Most of his colleagues either lived in Monaco or spent a good part of the year there. The question wether you'd be sble to join him, however, was not such a sure topic.
"Obviously, I don't want to rush your decision, even though I'd love to have you here with me, and there are a lot of hoops to go through, but it's something to think about", George added, squeezing your hand in his, "yes, something to think about definitely".
.
"I can't go". That's what George heard from you as you sat at the dinner table. On his way from the factory and after he had sorted a few errands down on the new apartment in the principality, your boyfriend picked up your favourite take-away, and now you had dropped your decision. "I just got a work promotion, my friends are here, my family is here, too. I can't just leave, at least for now", you explained. "And I love you, so much, George, but I can't go, I can't leave here", you gulped, finally looking up to meet his eyes.
"That's okay, darling. We'll make this work, right?", he nudged. He didn't want to lose you, not at this expense, not ever, but right now, this seemed to have triggered a new fear.
"We'll do our best", you tried, "it's either making this work or breaking up, right?". The sentence left your mouth in the most innocent and naive way possible, but the words resonated with you and George.
"Can you promise me something?", George asked and you nodded, "you'll always talk to me the minute anything feels off, and I'll do the same with you", he stated, getting up and making you get up too, pulling you flush against his chest, kissing the top of your head.
"Deal", you smiled, resting your chin on his chest, "but you'll have to let me help decorate".
.
"The apartment feels lonely, I have to admit", George said over FaceTime as you both had dinner, him in Monaco and you in London. It had become the only time in the schedule where you were able to speak to eachother that wasn't in text form.
"It's the same here", you admitted, "feels way too big without you here, but we're making do, right?", you smiled, rolling the spaghetti on your fork.
.
You were making do until you weren't, that's what you thought as you drove to the airport to pick your boyfriend up. He was flying in today for the first time in a month, and the butterflies in your stomach weren't all just anticipation to finally see him. You had promised eachother that you would tell the other when it wasn't working and when you felt like things needed a change, and tonight would be exactly that. To prove yourself that it was just the distance and not something else entirely.
George walked through the terminal with his small carry-on bag, the buzz of the families gathering their children in one place and people collecting their bags behind him as he walked as fast as he could without running into anyone. He missed you loads, and part of him wishes you missed him like that, too, despite not liking the idea that, like him, you had spent nights up thinking about your relationship or that your work meetings were also interrupted by nagging thoughts and doubts about how you were doing the long distance relationship.
It didn't take him long to see you amongst the crowd. The later flight meant a lot less people in the airport when you compared to other situations where you picked him up, making it easy for him to reach you, "hey, darling", he hugged you, "I've missed you so much", he whispered into your hair.
Inhaling his scent brought you to a calmer state of mind. George was home and his presence alone would always make you feel at home no matter what, and maybe that was hard to admit, but equally necessary, "I missed you too, handsome. How was your flight?", you asked, hugging his waist as you walked to the carpark, "it was good, not too bumpy".
The ride to the apartment was filled with comfortable conversatiom, George's hand on your thigh as you drove while you chatted about what you heard on the radio, parking the car in the garage and heading up.
"I didn't know if you had eaten enough on the plane, so in case you were hungry, I made some extra food for dinner", you announced, "it's in the fridge if you'd like", while you stored your coat away in the hallway closet.
"I'm good, thanks. I've been thinking about some cuddles though", he mumbled, kissing your forehead and circling your waist, "to the sofa?", he wondered, guiding you both to sit against the soft pillows.
The feeling of being in your boyfriend's embrace after such a long time must've triggered your emotions, soon enough bringing tears to your eyes, "darling, what's the matter? Is something hurting you?", George asked, his thumbs coming up to wipe your tears.
"I know we promised to tell eachother right away, but I also wanted to give it time", you hiccuped, "and it wasn't the best idea, because I feel like this", your lip trembled.
George rubbed your back now, hoping to get you to breathe a little slower and calmer, "what have you been wanting to tell me?", he asked.
"We said we would be honest, so this is me being honest. I don't know about you, but I'm not enjoying being away from you. I knew it wouldn't be good, but I didn't think it would be this bad. And it's not fair to ask you to move back here, nor it is fair for me to have to go to you, so this is a big big whole mess", you explained, looking at George's somewhat stunned expression.
"I have to admit that I don't like it either, but it's like you say, it's not fair to ask either of us to move, not like this anyway", he tiptoed around the subject. He wanted you to be with him so badly he has most likely considered all of the possibilities to solve this situation, and very few of them actually seemed doable.
"So what do we do?", you asked, afraid of the answer you'd get, remembering the small joke you made about breaking up a few weeks ago, "darling, I love you so much, but we need to sort this out", you yelped.
Shuffling in his seat, George looked at the situation clearly, "I want you to feel comfortable, Y/N, and if this situation isn't doing that for you, then it needs sorting out. If there is anything we can do to make it better, I'm in. Darling, I'm all in of it helps us", he pleaded.
"I need to think about all of these things, all of these situations", you said, getting up, "I'm sleeping in the spare bedroom, okay?", you checked with George, "I love you and I need to figure this out on my own", you tried, hoping he would understand.
Nodding, your boyfriend noted his understanding, "of course, whatever it is to help us, I meant it", he got up, his hand brushing your hair behind your ear, "I love you, Y/N".
Walking to the spare bedroom didn't feel as lonely as you thought it would, most likely because you had grown accustomed to sleeping on your own, but knowing George was on the other side of the wall helped. He had been understanding and supportive, and to know that he was giving you time to think this through without any judgement or pressure.
It was weird for some people, but making a list of pros and cons for situations like this helped you decide. The written words and the way you weighed them in according to the different criteria allowed you to think about it. You saw your future with George in it, that was a no brainer, so there had to be wiggle room. Because you had a good relationship with your boss, the later hours on the clock didn't keep you from sending her an e-mail, her answer being one of the confirmations you needed.
Grabbing your phone, you checked the last time your parents had been online, pressing dial when you saw they were still awake, "hey guys, I have something to ask you", you began, "how bad would it be if I spent a little less time here?".
.
George woke up alone like he had fallen asleep. After getting ready, he headed to the kitchen, hearing a small noise from the spare bedroom as he thought you were just getting up, almost recognising which step you were in your routine by the noises.
"Good morning", you said, catching your boyfriend's attention as he buttered some toast, "hey, darling, did you have a good sleep?", he asked. He wanted to know if you had made a decision or reached a conclusion, but asking upfront wasn't the smoothest idea, he thought.
"I did okay", you fumbled with your feet, not knowing how to approach the situation, "I got an email from Anna", you said, seeing George's puzzled expression, "I asked her if I could work remotely, pop to the office every now and again, but mostly remote, and she said yes", you explained further, seeing his smile.
"I'm not doing this out of obligation, I'm doing this for me and for you too in a way, but because I want us to be okay, I want us to be good", you grabbed his hands, "and I'll still spend some time here, but it will be sporadic".
"This is great, you have no idea how much this means to me", George hugged you, "you're incredible, Y/N Y/L/N, and I'll never stop saying that".
"Only one thing, though", you tapped his nose, "my parents demanded that, since we're moving, that they can visit and whenever we're back home, mum wants to have dinner", you shrugged your shoulders as your boyfriend laughed, "Oh, what a bother to have to eat your mum's delicious cooking and your father's cheesecake"
202 notes ¡ View notes