#maybe i’ll make a big rambly post for no one to read

[mostspecialgirl]

growtopia is the funniest game of all time even if only considering that you can tell people “yeah man you can play as rayman in it if you pay like $300 usd to some guy in indonesia. No theres no other way to do it if you’re a new player” and it’s just true

[chastiefoul]

valentines gone wrong ft. childe, scara, and neuvilette

a/n: yes. you read that right valentines work on september!! this is just something random i wanna write one day when i'm lying down and ofc i can't wait until february next year (also how is it alr almost 2 months since i posted something???) tags: just fluff, light-read, and everything in-between, modern au (?) just don't think too much abt it hehe - summary: it's valentines and of course you have plans to give sweets to your lover. however because one thing and another, you had to entrust it to someone else in hope it will be handed safely to them. what happened when it didn't?

childe

you went home excited, anticipating his reaction to your handmade sweets, however what greets you at the door was a sulky childe, who avoided eye contact as if his life depended on it as he limits himself to a a sentence everytime you ask him something.

“something happened today, babe?” you asked him worriedly, the chocolate was the back of your mind seeing the state of your boyfriend in. “oh something definitely should have happened,” he quipped, his lower mouth sticking out slightly. “that sounds like a dig at me, did i forgot something?” you asked as you follow his gaze to what he thought must be the most interesting flower vase ever. he shrugged, refusing to give you more.

frustrated by his rejection to tell you what’s wrong, you held his face with both of your palm, turning his face to yours. although the move met no resistance, childe still refused to look at you in the eyes and only now his childish grumbles turned into such a sad expression.

“baby? please tell me what i did,” you were gentle with it, rubbing your thumb below his eyes. “...late.”

“what?”

“chocolate. where’s mine? i saw you gave your friends one so i don’t think im crazy to expect one too, especially as your boyfriend.” he pouted and you swore it looked so adorable and so out-of-character of him that you wanted to kiss him—wait.

“huh? but i did give you one!” you claimed, confusion rose inside you. “huh? but i didn’t get it...” childe’s face matched your expression. “well technically i gave it to scara to give it to you.. did he not... give it to you?”

“i wouldn’t be this insufferable if i got one, you know that, but no he didn’t say anything—and also really babe? scara? the guy who hates and made fun of me every chance he got?” he crossed his arm, raising an eyebrow, as he questioned your questionable decision-making. “hey give me a break, i was in a rush there thinking i couldn’t give you the chocolate in time. and he made me say please three times before he said he would consider doing it-oh i see how i was wrong there.” your line of ramble humbled you, the silence was loud.

“maybe he just put it in your bag or something?” you offered. “you really think he’s someone who’d do that?” he asked. “in desperate times i’d give even scara the benefit of the doubt,” you stated, opening childe’s bag. and there it was, put nicely at the very top, your chocolate for your lover.

you smiled, for all the shit-talk scara gave everyone on a daily basis you knew you could count on him. “see? i knew he’s actually a big softie for stuff like this.”

childe practically runs to your side. “my chocolate? aw babe so you really didn’t forget me!” he peppered kisses all over your face, then clasping the sweet to his chest like it’s a new-born baby. “of course i’d never. but maybe next year i’ll just give it directly to you.”

“yeah? please do, today’s event just wasn’t great for my heart.”

neuvilette

“welcome home, dear.” you greeted him cheerily as he just arrived home. it was quite late, and you had entrust the chocolate you were supposed to give to him at a reasonable hour so he could enjoy it instead of giving it to him at home.

he kissed your temple in return, a smile you’re still head over heels for on his lips. but it doesnt quite reach his eyes. 

“what’s wrong?” you asked carefully. “nothing is wrong,” he replied, somehow looking nervous. “yet it’s strange for you to be looking so fidgety. tell me?”

“well,” he paused a little, stroking your hair as he pondered the best way to approach the sentence he’s about to say. “i saw you today giving chocolates to navia and wriothesley.. i couldn’t talk to you because i was in a rush to deal with an urgent case,” he said, not looking at you on the eyes. “oh, did that bother you? it’s just they’re such good friends of mine and it’s only friendship cookies-“

“no, dear of course not. i know you’re a loving person who always appreciate those around you, it’s just..”

“just?”

neuvilette looked like he didn’t hear the rest of the words after that you did make some for the white-haired male. a smile bloomed on his face as he shook his head. “no problem i will ask them about it tomorrow. i’m just delighted you kept me in your thoughts.” a gentle expression was loyal on his features. “well of course neuvillete, you hardly ever leave my thoughts, don’t you know?” he chuckled. “i’m familiar with that you see, considering you never leave mine as well.”

the next sentence was almost audible as he spoke. “do i not get one..?” he asked ever so softly sounding a little sad, his calloused hand ran across your arm, tracing along your vein as it touched your fingers and you're sure there's something wrong in your head because all you could think about that second was how adorable the usual charismatic man was being. yet you held your smile.

“of course you do! did it not reach you? i asked the guard in front of your door because i afraid i’d bother you at work hours. sorry neuvilette, i promised i made some for you, and i was so proud of it too...”

scara

“no i’m not.” he said, with the worst frown you’ve seen on him for a while and that’s saying a lot.

“you’re definitely sulking,” you said. “shut up,” he grumbled. “hey i was supposed to be one who’s doing the sulking. we’re nearing the end of the day and you haven’t even mentioned about the chocolate i gave you today!” you retorted out of frustration but most of all confusion because you had no idea what made your lover fall into such a bad mood.

“what.”

“what?”

“say that again,” scara said, “that i gave you chocolate?” you asked. “no you didn’t, you liar!” he complained, his frown deepened if that’s even possible. “wait what? i swear i asked childe to give it to you earlier today! i was ambushed by customers today at the shop so i was scared i couldn’t give it to you on time so i asked him. did it not get to you?” you explained.

“i came home empty-handed didn’t i? also really, that dense fool?” his displeasure was obvious upon the new information you couldn’t help but chuckle slightly. “don’t look so disgusted, he’s not that bad.”

“sure, although you know what’s bad? that i don’t have my chocolates right now.” he crossed his arm, fuming almost looking like a child who got their toys taken. “alright enough of your pouting. we’ll interogate him later. for now, i seem to have leftover ingredients, i’ll make you a new one.” you approached him, combing through the back of his hair as you planted a gentle kiss on his cheek. he replied by pulling you closer as he nuzzled into your neck. “it better be good,” he mumbled.

at the end you didn’t even make it to 5 minutes before scara followed you to the kitchen, insisting that he made it together too because he was ‘watching over you so you don’t mess up’ but personally i think he just felt bad because you need to make a new one and wanted to help you any way he can. that’s something he’d never admit even if there’s a gun pointing at his head, though.

[tritoch]

Have you got any thoughts to share about Sphene? I saw your post about how misrepresented FFXIV’s female characters are, and I’ve been hoping to see anything more than the typical “Evil AI colonizer etc.” or “Tragic woman who can never change ever” or “Wuk Lamat’s girlfriend”. Maybe our interpretations will differ but I’ll be happy if you can provide anything more complex than those.

Sure! Throwing all this under a read-more for anyone who hasn't finished 7.0 yet. I think I'll probably expand on this more later but wanted to get initial thoughts down. (Note after writing: I meant this to be brief but uhhhh brevity is not my strong suit sorry. This take just sort of ends abruptly because I realize I'm rambling.) Again, spoilers through the end of 7.0 MSQ.

I think Sphene is the sharpest work the game has done yet in casting the antagonist as the noble double of the protagonist (a well it returns to a lot with Emet, and Zenos, and Golbez, and...). But because the protagonist here is Wuk Lamat and not the Warrior of Light, that's also a much more defined and interesting role. To me, Wuk Lamat is, above all, the Righteous Queen, who rules thoughtfully, wisely, and justly, and whose claim to the throne is justified by her moral clarity. Sphene, in turn, is also a wise and good queen, one who undertakes all her actions with her people first in her hearts, a sense of compassion towards all, and a clear eye for the consequences and costs of her intended course of action. And it leads to utter disaster, for her, her people, and the people of Tural. That rocks!

The first half of 7.0 is about justifying the fact that Wuk Lamat's going to be Dawnservant. Wuk Lamat is compassionate, curious, wise, and open-minded. She wins over rebels and malcontents not by asserting her authority or by strength of force, but by taking her obligations to them (as her subjects) seriously. She knows many of her subjects personally and takes a great interest in their lives, and she respects even those who openly oppose her.

And everything Wuk Lamat does, Sphene does to 11. Wuk Lamat respects her subject peoples and is curious about their cultures? Sphene forcibly annexes Yyasulani, but goes out of her way and expends Alexandria's limited resources to enable the remaining Xak Turali to live in their accustomed way if desired (…to the extent allowed by the new permanent lightning storms and the internal conflicts caused by regulator adoption). Wuk Lamat cares about her people not just in the abstract but as individuals? Sphene visits sick kids, knows them by name! Wuk Lamat understands the burden of rulership is too great and cedes half her power to her brother? Sphene recognizes her own weaknesses and makes a deal with the devil to keep Alexandria's culture alive! Wuk Lamat is willing to die for her people? Sphene will forcibly traumatize herself into being a better queen, if that's what rulership demands.

For an expansion that spends the first half being like "wow isn't this perfect candidate for the crown so likable and humble? wouldn't it be nice to be ruled by a good king?," it sure is funny that the final boss is THE QUEEN ETERNAL and she hits you with attacks like LEGITIMATE FORCE and ABSOLUTE AUTHORITY and ROYAL DOMAIN. This, to me, is Sphene's role: she complicates and questions the themes we've developed in the first half. Most importantly to me, she makes us ask: what is devotion to a people or culture even worth?

There's a thing I kept thinking of constantly during Dawntrail, not because I think it directly influenced the game in any way but because the parallels were so stark and startling. It's Jonathan Hickman's New Avengers #18 (2014). Truthfully, I'm not a big comics guy; I only know this sequence because Ta-Nehisi Coates cited it as inspiration for his Black Panther run on Twitter once (I also didn't read TNC's run, I was following him for politics talk). Forgive me, comics people, if I get any details wrong. The parallels are almost comical, though. It goes like this:

A superhuman secret society formed of some of the smartest heroes (and villains) in the land re-forms to oppose an existential threat caused by incursions from other dimensions that threaten to cause literal collisions between Earth and its alternate dimension counterparts. Seeing no other alternatives, they undertake work on a weapon to destroy these other worlds. T'challa—king of a fictional hyperadvanced nation called Wakanda, and also the superhuman Black Panther—meets with his ghostly predecessors, the previous Black Panthers/kings, for he fears the moral stain on his soul and the souls of the people of Wakanda, if they survive explicitly by killing their alternate counterparts, will be too heavy to bear. His ancestors are not impressed.

To them, there is no question at all. A king's duty may be complex in the execution, but it is simple in its conception. Your people come before all others. Always. This is, must be, the fundamental ethic of a good king. To do otherwise would be a betrayal of the social order on which this imagined good monarchy is built. In a situation like this, the only option is to do what you must to protect them. "Will there be a cost? Yes. Might the universe burn? Let it. . . . You will kill them all if it means Wakanda stands. The golden city must never fall."

"I will do what I must" is Sphene's guiding principle. It is so important to her that when she recognizes that her sentimental attachments are making her waver in her duty, she severs them entirely, sacrificing her whole identity to the throne. It is also implicitly Wuk Lamat's position: she has no choice but to fight Sphene because to do otherwise would be to fail to protect her people. In fact, it's briefly even sort of the Warrior of Light's position, as when you tell Sphene before her trial that you understand what you must do, which is shut her down to protect others.

(One quick thought about the Warrior of Light: one cool thing about the antagonist this time being a double in a more exact way than Emet or Zenos is that it means other characters get a chance to relate to her differently than Wuk Lamat. The Warrior of Light, for example, is pressed into her service immediately upon your first meeting as the Queen's Champion, there to defend her if need be against all evil. This role is further affirmed by both robot Otis and Endless Otis, who essentially hand off their role as her knight to you, and reinforced when you flash back to the "might I call upon your aid" moment right before the end. Except, of course, you are loyal not just to her, but to the principles she represents, which her own acts betray, and so your ultimate act of aid is to essentially pass judgment on her and execute her. In a sense, you become the internal safeguard that a political system is supposed to have to protect against this very issue, and which Alexandria explicitly lost when it cast out/forgot Otis. Very Voeburt/ShB tank quests, it owns.)

But really, it's Sphene who embodies this sort of grim logic best. Aside from her transformation into the Queen Eternal, it's also why she suggests you simply become Alexandrians. It's the only way for her to reconcile her values and worldview, which have backed her into a corner where preserving Alexandria has come to mean a maximalist declaration of war on all life outside its borders because the kind of absolutely pain-free life she envisions for her citizens is completely unsustainable.

In this reading, one of Sphene's main beats is to unsettle what has preceded her in MSQ. In nearly all respects, she shares your values. She prizes life, is curious about other cultures, believes in the greatest good for the greatest possible number. But she is also a queen, and therefore irrevocably (in her eyes) tied to her state. Gulool Ja Ja and Wuk Lamat (and Koana) are the mythical wise rulers, thank god--but what if Wuk had inherited a Turali state that wasn't desperately in need of cross-cultural understanding, but one in a state of war? What value would her deep love for the people of Tural have held then? Sphene says, it would have held no value. If the survival of your people means harming the innocent, you harm the innocent. Kingship allows for no alternatives.

But she also concedes, in the very next breath, that she is still kind of wrong. Because what happened here was not inevitable, despite her programming (a brief note: to me Sphene being programmed is exactly the same as Emet being maybe-tempered, it's a fantasy gloss on the idea of social and cultural education. "I was programmed for this" is really no different from "I was trained and educated for this"), because the truth is that this kind of thoughtful, principled devotion to the state and its people is also a form of sentimental attachment, in the end. One that is maintained not because it is natural, and necessary, but because the monarch, too, likes it, and gets something from it.

In so many ways, in so many senses, the monarch is the state. Kings and queens may fancy themselves merely a reflection of their people's needs and desires, but of course even a cursory glance at history will tell you that far more often, states reflect their rulers. Sphene and Wuk Lamat both suggest that their conflict was inevitable, but was it? Or is the truth, as Sphene glancingly acknowledges here, that she turned her own fears and desires into the same policy goals that led to this tragedy? And if so...what does that say of our Good Queen, Wuk Lamat? Perhaps this could be different if they met earlier, says Wuk Lamat. But when? When did Wuk Lamat ever not love her people so dearly that she would not have sacrificed herself for them, or caused mass death for the sake of their survival? When did Sphene not believe the Endless to be people, or the preservation of Alexandria to be the most important thing? Maybe she means "had we met before you met Zoraal Ja," but of course, we the player actually saw their meeting. And we know that Sphene even then was not the hapless naif she'd like to pretend. She always knew exactly what she was doing.

We know the price of this kind of thinking, this Hobbesian view that states are engaged in a struggle of all against all. Living Memory lets you walk through it. To preserve Tural, we exterminate the Endless. We befriend them, learn about their lives, promise to remember them, and then we destroy them and their homes, leaving nothing but a bleak blank landscape and the sound of wind. This is what Sphene would have done to Tural and Eorzea. Indeed, it's what she's already doing to the people of Yyasulani, because no amount of well-intentioned aid can make up for trapping people under the dome for 30 years and systematically eroding their culture through the resonators.

To me, this is what makes Sphene really work, that way she has of forcing Wuk Lamat and the player to commit the same kinds of sins she has. We'd like to think ourselves better than her, but of course, we've already reconciled with and integrated Mamook's brutal eugenicist regime back into Turali society well before we ever met Sphene. At the end of our long "wow isn't having a wise queen cool???" expansion, we are met with "Legitimate Force" and "Absolute Authority" and see them for what they truly are: nothing but tools of violence. No longer does the idea of the Warrior of Light hanging around Tural as Wuk Lamat's advisor have the same attraction, now that we have been reminded of the way the putatively unquestionable logic of kingship can ultimately lock even the wisest and kindest rulers into a path of war and exploitation and destruction.

I think Sphene is FFXIV's most interesting and nuanced depiction yet of a leader. She really, truly, wants nothing more than to save her people and protect them from pain. But even seemingly loving and compassionate goals like these can readily lead us down dark paths. She's a "hard men make hard choices"-type character, a noble but misguided opponent, but as a loving and elegant fairy queen instead of a grizzled knight or extremely sad man. She fucking rocks.

[worldsewage]

🚧 I’m carny, (he/him, 19) but feel free to call me WorldSewage, World, Sewage, Gatored, any other iteration of it, as long as I know you’re talking about me. This is a side account!

Click read more and scroll to the ⚠️ section for a FAQ!

Some of my content WILL be suggestive. Please block #suggestive (or maybe even nsfw?) if you’re uncomfortable with this content! I can’t imagine that I’ll ever be drawing sexually explicit (exposed genitalia) nsfw content but block the tags NSFW just in case…

AU content will be rolled out slowly, I am not a very fast artist, but my ask box will always remain open, so feel free to ask questions (chances are it will be answered! Albeit slowly!)

I love my mutuals, do not be afraid to talk to me! I can’t promise I’ll be super chatty, but I want it to be known that I love a good conversation. I don’t know how to convey this so often I wind up drawing your characters.

If you bastards open up a white board, @ me! I want to join! (Joking)

Homerun Au / ABOUT ME / extra art / info under the cut! 📌

My agents:

Alligator : (she/her)

Saint : (they/them)

Valentine : (they/them) (and she/her? But sparingly, they’d prefer if you would begin with they/them, you can ease into she / her.)

July : (they/them)

My tags are formatted pretty clearly, but just in case:

Homerun au - pertains to all information / art that takes place in this au, my agents are all designed to fit into this au— BUT, can be viewed as canon compliant if you want :]

Most of my character tags are formatted like “Name ( thing they are )” — (examples: “saint (Neo 3) , fido (oc) , carny (sona) , valentine (agent 8) )

Carnying - off topic posts , I don’t usually vent publicly , but most of my rambling will probably be under this tag. I also tag off topic (ie non splatoon asks) with carnying at times.

EMERGENCY EXIT - name of my Splatoon Idol ocs, I still tag their names, but this is the name of the group.

My art - is my art tag… I usually always tag the characters featured in my art.

Doodles - a not very often used tag… I use it for WIPs or joke drawings sometimes? I forget this tag exists frequently … I do use it for WIPS.

Salmonids/Octarians/Inkling tags - usually for world building or headcannons…!

⚠️ I draw on JSPAINT or on Procreate: I use primarily custom brushes.

⚠️ catch me on my Main account— @gatored , and for warrior cats content: @rendside

⚠️ here’s my artfight to those who are interested! https://artfight.net/~Gatored

⚠️ I don’t currently have a toyhouse, when I make one, I’ll link it here!

⚠️ I do not take commissions (currently.)

⚠️ I don’t know how I pick colors, I just do. I would like to make a tutorial some say, but I have no idea what I’m doing!

⚠️ art requests are ok! I’m willing to do art trades, but as of right now, I am unavailable:)

⚠️ I’m okay with fan art! Please just don’t be weird! I’m okay with oc interaction fanart but only with my splatoon ocs!!

⚠️ Please mind the ages of my characters, any inappropriate comments made towards characters who are children / depicted as children (ie. Characters who are 18+ but in the post are under age) will be killed.

⚠️ He/Him. Refrain from using “they” to the best of your ability… I’m 19– January birthday, year of the rooster. I’m the guy who draws the bipedal salmonids.

⚠️ I work in the kitchen and get paid minimum wage and I love my job and life to bits, I am not a “professional” artist, but I work quite a bit, so my drawing time isn’t very long.

⚠️ I don’t believe DNIs work, but let it be known AI / transphobes / unsolicited critiques will be blocked. I abuse the block button, at times.

⚠️ feel free to tag me! I don’t mind! If you have questions Asks are the best way! I don’t respond often to Direct Messages.

⚠️ you are required to compare my art to various foods. (Joke. but I will smile big if you do this)

——

🥩— I can’t promise I’ll update the below as of posting this (3/6/23) so please check out the “HOMERUN AU” tag for all information, but here are some quick links for those interested!

I know this au MAY seem a tad confusing, but I’m updating it as I go!

Homerun World Building: X — X

SQUIDSISTERS X — Evil Callie + “MUD” — 🐙Octavio

DEEPCUT: “Return of the Mammalians” (designs) (designs + small information) (bigman comic)

[artist-issues]

every now and then I play with the exercise of "what if we're wrong" because sometimes I get bored and also as an actual exercise. I usually apply this to Christianity/religion, matters of the after life, or about other people.

So sometimes I poke at the big question, if Christianity isn't real, what does that mean? And I don't usually go the route of atheism or bad sci fi, just that the religion is proven to be fundamentally inaccurate to reality, so what does that mean?

Anyway it wasn't until I was reading a really good sci fi story, where this one dude explains to some aliens the concept of "Love your enemies, do good to those that hurt you" and of course the aliens are like what? (Because in the sci fi narrative the universe is functioning under a Dark Forest Theory) And the dude explains its from one of earth's greatest teachers. And the aliens are like, if the inhabitants of the universe could believe that, this universe would be a different place entirely.

And it was at that point where I realized bro... even if it's not accurate, practicing Christianity is still worth it, for a human being. Loving your enemies means loving them like humans. The Poor, the Meek, and those who mourn, those are promises and comforts that we shouldn't toss aside even if heaven isn't real.

I don't know, this is just a terribly simplistic because I'm not the best at putting my English thoughts into english out loud, but that crack gave me a touch of useful coping. I asked my dad, if aliens are proven to exist it doesn't automatically mean christians stop practicing and believing, right? And he said obviously not.

I don't know but have you ever engaged in such a question " what if we're wrong?" And if you ever have what answer had you arrived at?

EDIT: As @atwas-meme-ing correctly pointed out in the comments section of this post, who cares whether or not I’ve played this game: God answered the question through Paul in his letter to the Corinthians: “If in Christ we have hope in this life only, we are of all people most to be pitied.” 1 Corinthians 5:19.

There’s no “good moral teaching” to be found in Christianity if Christ wasn’t God, or if God didn’t exist, or if eternity weren’t real. My rambling logic is below the cut.

I mean, I play that “game” all the time about other things, and sometimes I do it for work. I’ll take two established characters and a setting me and my friends have agreed on, and I’ll “run a scenario.”

But the thing is, once my brain picks out something that doesn’t make sense, or that wouldn’t be in-character for the characters to do, the whole scenario grinds to a halt and I have to start over. I can’t suspend my own disbelief once I notice that something doesn’t line up. Even if I really liked “where the scene was going” before I noticed that thing. Whatever I’m getting stuck on because of it’s out-of-character nature unravels the parts I like, too.

All that to say I can’t even run a scenario in my head where “what if all this isn’t true? What if it fundamentally doesn’t line up with reality?”

I can’t. Once or twice I have tried. But I hit snags immediately. I’ll go, “pretend all of this Christian religion really is just a centuries-old conspiracy humanity’s been patching up the holes in.”

But then that little simulation-checker in my brain goes, “then how do you explain people dying for it? That many martyrs aren’t likely to have allowed themselves to be tortured and murdered for something they knew was a conspiracy.”

And I go, “well, pretend they died because they didn’t know it was a conspiracy, they believed it.”

And the sim-checker goes, “but the original disciples of Jesus, ground-zero of the faith, were all martyred. Not just people who learned from them and came after them and could’ve been hoodwinked: the starting points, themselves. They would’ve had to know it was a conspiracy, if it was a conspiracy, and they still willingly died for it.”

Maybe I’ll pivot and go, “pretend there isn’t objective truth.”

And the sim-checker goes, “there isn’t truth…objectively?”

Maybe I’ll pivot again and try, “pretend that everyone really does just measure morality based on what they’re used to, what their individual society’s trained them to associate with pleasant feelings and reactions.”

And the sim-checker goes, “Okay, where did those societies get the training manual? Where did it come from? Why do so many different societies’ and people groups’ ‘association with pleasant feelings and reactions’ around the world have so many things in common?”

And the answers to all that leads me back to Christianity. Even if I go the longest way round I can think of.

And eventually I quit running those scenarios. Because guess what?

Where’d the ability to run scenarios come from?

How did I get that? How did you?

See, the thing is, we go, “what if all of this isn’t true?” But it’s right there in the question. “Where did you get that desire? The desire for “truth?”” Is it to keep yourself safe, like the natural animals have an instinct toward, or is it to keep yourself sane, because you need some sense in this life to make it through? Sure. Maybe. But why? What’s “sane?” What’s “safe?” Sanity presupposes order. Why do you, and all humans, naturally lean toward wanting things to be “the way they’re supposed to be?” Where’d that come from, that idea of “supposed to be?” And Safety presupposes good being found in avoiding pain and damage and fear. “Good?” Where’d you get that idea?”

The further you dig, even into your own psyche, the less you can run any scenario that has God absent entirely. And no wonder. He designed it.

One more thing.

“I am trying here to prevent anyone saying the really foolish thing that people often say about Him: I’m ready to accept Jesus as a great moral teacher, but I don’t accept his claim to be God. That is the one thing we must not say. A man who was merely a man and said the sort of things Jesus said would not be a great moral teacher. He would either be a lunatic — on the level with the man who says he is a poached egg — or else he would be the Devil of Hell. You must make your choice. Either this man was, and is, the Son of God, or else a madman or something worse. You can shut him up for a fool, you can spit at him and kill him as a demon or you can fall at his feet and call him Lord and God, but let us not come with any patronizing nonsense about his being a great human teacher. He has not left that open to us. He did not intend to.” - C.S. Lewis

I used to lean into the idea you’re saying here. “Even if it’s not true, I’m going to live like it is and believe it just in case. Besides, it makes me better, and makes the world better.” That’s not belief at all. That’s ends-justify-the-means thinking. The teachings that Jesus gave which “make the world a better place” are utterly worthless if they’re coming out of the mouth of a liar. Because why should anyone believe Him? Why should anyone “turn the other cheek,” or “do unto others?” Because it makes us “better?” Who gets to define “better?”

The answer, of course, is Jesus does. The One who taught those sayings. But only if He’s God. Only if He was telling the truth. If He wasn’t God, what right has He, to tell us to give away our possessions to others and let them abuse us and give our lives up? If He was a liar, all of those “good teachings” would be tainted and untrustworthy. Besides, like I just said, they’re all only able to be called “good” teachings if you accept that there is one objective, universal “good.” And we’re right back to “where did Good come from?”

All roads lead back there, to Him. But we humans like to do this thing with God where we pretend there could be any reality outside of Him. It sort of makes sense, how we got that way. After all, when was the last time you noticed oxygen? How often during the day do you consciously inhale and exhale? As often as it happens automatically? How often during the day do you notice oxygen touching your skin or moving your hair or drying your eyeballs? As often as those things happen automatically? No. But it’s ever-present. Without it, you couldn’t live, let alone notice anything. But oxygen has always been around and everything in our lives interacts with or can only exist WITH it. God is much more than that, but that’s as close as I can get to communicating: He’s so good, and He’s so constantly there, everything, all the time, that it’s easy for us to take Him for granted, forget Him entirely, then use our two-pound brain matter to say, “He might not exist.” You might as well say, “imagine a world with no matter.” 🙄 “Ohhhh kay. Then it wouldn’t be a world.”

[ecstasyhighway]

You & I | E.Williams

chapter i

CW, ellie is a pervert here she watches the reader masturbate… there is smut towards the end guys (im not good at smut but i tried my best) masturbation (reader and ellie) , stalking, y/n is used

this might be straight cheese ngl…im not good at ts 😭 but enjoy ig

wc: 1.4k

read the prologue here ch 2

———————

“Hi! Hello”

A voice chimes from behind her, she turns around, and a lump forms in her throat.

it's…you.

Ellie quickly clears her throat and begins to talk, her eyes scanning your features. She is infatuated with you, you’re gorgeous, ethereal even…

“hi sorry how may I help you?”

“Yes, do you guys happen to have 21’s new album?”

you ask so sweetly, Ellie watches you speak, your oh-so-beautiful smile just making her want to fall to her knees. Ellie signals you to follow her, heading back to the rap section of the store, her eyes scan the shelves as she looks for the album, She reaches up and pulls out the ‘American Dream’ and hands it to you.

“This one?”

You smile and giggle a little, “Yes! this is exactly what I've been looking for… I couldn’t find it anywhere else I've looked all over thank you um…?” You trail off looking for a name tag, “..Ellie, thank you”

Ellie smiles, her face feeling warm, she knows she's red as fuck right now and her feeling embarrassed about it is just making her even more flustered “Y-yeah no problem, is that all? I can ring you up over here” She chuckles softly trying to cover the anxiety in her voice.

You and Ellie head towards the register, she rings you up and you hand her your card. Ellie examines your card trying to get your name, she needs to know, she knows nothing about you, just some things like you like 21 savage and Tyler. But that’s not nearly enough, she needs to know everything about you, things even you don’t know about yourself...

“y/n? That's a really pretty name” She smirks and takes a mental note of your first and last name, she will most definitely be looking you up later.

“oh thank you so much!” you say with joy in your voice, “I might come back another time, I uhh really like music and I really want to learn how to play an instrument so maybe I’ll see you again?” you ask so innocently, Ellie, on the other hand, was freaking out on the inside, she just thought you were so gorgeous and she needed to know more about you and she needed you to come back

“yeah, uhm I teach acoustic guitar, and piano so if you ever want lessons just show up, I'm here pretty much all the time, haha yeah this store is actually my life and-“ She cuts herself off realizing she's just rambling about nothing. “sorry yes you will definitely see me again” she is mentally cursing at herself for being such a nervous wreck in front of you.

“awesome, I’ll see you laters Ellie” and with that, you turn around and focus your attention on your phone, a message dings and you begin typing away. Ellie noticed this and is already feeling a certain way.. do you have a boyfriend? girlfriend? Are you single..? its okay she’ll figure all that out.

Once Ellie’s shift was over she went down to her music room. She sat there for a second and put on some jazz, she grabbed her laptop and began her long and tedious search, y/n l/n, she scrolled through the search page filled with many other y/n l/n’s. she stops. ‘bingo’ she thinks to herself, she found you ‘y/n.oncam’ on pretty much everything. Luckily all your accounts are public, unluckily she notices that you literally post your entire life on the internet, ‘do you know how many creeps are on the internet? oh once I have you to myself no one will be able to ever know anything personal about you’ she scoffs.

Here's what she knows, you’re 20, you’re single, you like to read, and you lovee music.. you live in an apartment with a big window.

Wait, she knows that complex, yeah she knows where that is, it's right across the street from the bookstore Dina works at. Shit Dina! Ellie forgot that she promised to bring Dina a limited edition 2Pac vinyl she had in storage. Ellie jumped up, grabbed her jacket, went to the storage to grab the record. She gets in her car and heads to Dina’s bookstore.

‘D are you still at work?’

‘yes’

‘I'm bringing the record rn’

*Dinabina like a message*

Ellie arrived at the bookstore, the words ‘Hidden Pages’ flickering softly as one of the letters had gone out. Ellie walks into the store and walks up to Dina, who is reading.

“D, I got the record”

“yayy thank you Ellie” Dina walks up to her smiling and gives her a hug “I’ll give it back as soon as I'm finished listening to it”

Ellie said her goodbyes and left the store.

She looks around trying to find the apartment, she found it. ‘Havenwood apartments’ She walks to the tall building and examines it and she spots the only big window, no curtains, lights on, and a woman's figure dancing around. She gets closer to the building, not too close but close enough to see into the window. Sure enough, it's you, dancing and singing, oblivious to the world around you, if you would just stop and look out of your window you would see Ellie, watching you closely, biting her lip and just enjoying the view of you.

You had gotten tired, turned off the music and began getting ready for bed. Oh, but that feeling between your legs was getting stronger, you tried to ignore it, you’ve been pent up and so busy lately, mostly because of work and shit. ‘Fuck’ you curse quietly to yourself and you head to your couch, you slip your hands down your pants and begin rubbing circles on your clit, dipping your fingers into your hole and gathering your juices to add more lubrication. Your eyes close and as you add pressure to your throbbing clit, you feel yourself bucking your hips for more friction. Fingers pumping in and out of your hole. Your other hand fondling your soft tits, adding more stimulation ‘mmph fuck’ The noises coming from your mouth are almost pornographic, your neighbors could probably hear you as the walls are thin. You feel yourself getting closer so you begin moving faster your mouth forming an ‘O’ shape “Mmpfh shit’m gonna cum fuckfuckfuckfuckfuck” You get that feeling in your stomach and let yourself go, your orgasm hitting you like a truck, you continue rubbing your clit riding out your orgasm, legs shaking from the overstimulation. Once you’re done you sit up and head to the bathroom to clean yourself up and you go to your bed to watch a show, you feel so comfortable and safe in the warmth of your bed so, you drift off into a slumber…

Oh but little did you know. You weren’t alone. Ellie saw what you were doing, she saw your most intimate moment and you didn't even notice you were being watched. Like she thought you were oblivious to the world around you, a normal person would sense another watching them, but not you…or maybe you knew she was watching and you put on a show for her and only her. Ellie’s hand reaches to unbutton her jeans, reaches her hand into her underwear, and begins rubbing her clit to the thought of you, your body, your pussy just begging to be touched by her, your soft tits and your skin needing to be marked by her…she needs you so bad.. just as she’s about to come undone. an elderly opens the door behind her, luckily Ellie had her back turned so the lady didn’t see her pleasuring herself to you. Ellie saw that the lady had many bags and offered to help her.

“Can you call a cab for me dear, they all just speed right passed me?” the woman asked kindly, and Ellie did what she asked, grabbing the cab’s attention and opening the door for her, all with a smile and her juices dripping down her thighs. The cab leaves and Ellie walks to her car.. “why were you touching yourself out in public while watching an oblivious girl masturbate..you’re so fucking weird.. fuck Ellie what the fuck, you need to be more careful, that could’ve not gone in your favor…” she whispered to herself, her cheeks red from embarrassment. She gets in her car and heads to her apartment….

——————————

idk what a tag list is but someone said “need to be in the taglist” and my gf said that means they wanna be tagged when the next part comes out so yeah

🏷️ @vqxen

[violettwrites]

Hi! Just read something you posted a few hours ago, and thing is I'm thinking I'm basically setting myself up for getting disappointed by just sending in this ask—not to say that I'm discrediting you writing- god no— but just the fact that this is a really big undertaking. Whatever, whatever, I'm rambling atp.

Uh I wanted to ask for a DBF!Farmer!Rick x reader fic. Where reader is barely nineteen,— most of this next part doesn't really hold any significance to the plot, but it would be nice to read— long, jet back hair, super dark brown eyes, cinnamon skin, reader also religiously wears sundresses as well as always having a cherry lollipop/popsicle in her mouth. And since her farm doesn't have horses, she decides to ask Rick for horse riding lessons! I don't want you'll do with this but god speed!

(the reference photo, just in case. Te he~)

riding lessons 🗡️ dbf!rick grimes

summary: reader wants to learn to ride horses, and her father’s best friend is the one she turns to.

author’s note: here you go nonnie ! apologies if you were after something different, but i hope you enjoy !

also just a little heads up for my readers, at this moment i don’t really write smut. i’m just not too confident with it at this moment, but as my writing progresses i’m sure it’ll be something i look into in the future. this is not directed at you either, nonnie ! i just never really brought it up and i’ve been meaning to 🫶🏻

warnings: age gap ig???

word count: 970

it was a busy saturday morning, and your father’s farm was alive with people travelling from all over for your father’s sale yard for the year. you were up early ( as per usual ), in your favourite sundress. you had a cherry lollipop in hand as you walked through the yard, looking for the older male you had fancied since you were old enough to understand what crushes were.

“hey, rick!” you called out once you spotted the attractive man, your voice slightly muffled by the cherry lollipop in your mouth. “can i talk to you for a minute?”

rick grimes, your dad’s best friend from high school, turned around to look at you, his forearms leaning against a fence as he watched the cattle being rounded up from the field, ready to be auctioned off. “mornin’, darlin’,” he nodded at you, his words making your heart flutter. he turned around to face you, hands moving to rest on his hips. “what can i do for ya?”

you took a deep breath, trying to steady the nervous excitement. “i was wondering if you could give me some horse riding lessons. i’ve always wanted to learn, but we don’t have any horses on our farm.”

rick’s eyes sparkled with interest, eyeing the way your sundress stopped mid thigh. “well, i’d be more than happy to help with that. the horses we have are gentle, and i’m sure they’d love to have you.”

a surge of relief and excitement washed over you. “really? that would be wonderful! I’ve only ever seen them from the fence,” you sighed, pulling the lollipop from your mouth.

“how about this afternoon? you come on over and i’ll show you the ropes.” he raised his eyebrow, his gaze lingered on you for a moment longer. “and who knows, maybe i’ll learn a thing or to on how you ride.” he smirked, making your heart jump.

you nodded quickly. “that would be amazing, thank you. i really appreciate it.” you grinned, lollipop going back into your mouth as you turned around, quickly making your way back to the house.

— — —

a few hours later, you made the trip to rick’s farm, eager. you were stood next to comet, a beautiful chestnut mare. rick had helped you through the basics of grooming and saddling, and now he was standing besides you, hand on your lower back as he explained the basics of mounting a horse.

“alright, ready to jump on?” he asked, moving to grab the rein as he looked at you. you nodded your head, moving to put your foot through the stirrup like rick had explained, pulling yourself onto the horse. you could feel rick’s free hand on the back of your thigh, steadying you.

once you were comfortably sat in the saddle, you looked down at him, his lips holding an encouraging smile. “look at you, you’re a natural already.” he chuckled, patting your thigh as he moved towards the front of comet, ready to lead her.

“alright, let’s do this.” you grinned down at him, feeling comfortable. rick nodded, clicking his tongue to get comet moving slowly and steadily.

“just relax and let comet guide you, okay? i’ve got you, but she’s a good horse. carl first learnt to ride on this old girl.” he hummed, smiling at you. “if you need anything, just let me know.”

rick walked alongside comet, offering pointers and encouragement. his gaze was appreciative, and you could feel the warmth of his eyes as he looked at you. “you’re doing great, darlin’,” he said, a playful grin on his face. “you know, i might start thinking about taking lessons from you if you keep this up.”

you laughed, a blush on your cheeks at the warmth of his words. “i’m glad you think so. i’ve always admired how you handle the horses. you make it look so easy.”

rick’s smile widened. “well, I’ve got to say, seeing you out here in that dress, it’s a pretty nice change of pace. makes me wish every day was a lesson with you.”

the flirtatious remark made your heart skip a beat. you tried to focus on guiding comet, but your thoughts kept drifting back to rick’s teasing comments. as you trotted around the paddock, the sun warm on your back, you caught glimpses of rick watching you with a twinkle in his eye.

by the end of the lesson, you were glowing with pride. rick patted comet affectionately, bringing her to a stop. he turned to you, his eyes soft and warm. “you’ve done real well today. keep practicing, and you might just become the best rider around here.”

you looked down at him, your heart full of joy. “thank you, rick. this has been amazing.”

rick tipped his hat with a grin, his eyes meeting yours in a way that made your stomach flutter. “anytime. i’m always here if you want more lessons. and who knows, maybe next time we’ll make it a little more... interesting.”

you blushed once again at his words, moving to get off comet, rick’s hands coming to your hips to help you down, the warmth of his hands on your skin made your stomach fill with butterflies.

once you had left the paddock with rick, the older male walking you back to your car, you offered him a smile before leaning in to press a kiss to his cheek. you noticed his cheeks turn a light shade of pink as he opened your car door for you, smiling down at you as you slipped into your car.

“i’ll see you later, darlin’. i look forward to our little lessons.” he chuckled, closing the door for you, waving as you drove away. you couldn’t help but think of him on your drive home, excited for your future lessons together.

[thewandererh]

bOO‼️

@if-you-heart @if-you-mind @if-you-soul

told heart this but i drew fanart of ya’ll’s sweet angular soul guy :]! i couldn’t not…look at his dumb face…..🥺

i have two versions because the lighting experiment came out ok-ish. t was originally blue (because it was coming from the left side lmao) but red looks better 🤷

it’s a little simple and the composition is messy, but it was a good stress relief + shading practice :D! im proud of it. i’ll definitely draw him (and the gang) more though if i can!! been getting better with hair recently and tested out my skills with this one :]. styling and keeping consistent with hair is tough, but oddly relaxing. did some lineart in the car somehow 👀??

he looks like such a,,,bro i can’t….. i love how stupidly spindly he is

i was attached to this stupid lanky fictional(???) man the *moment* i saw this post. absolutely bonkers. i was so charmed by this concept i shared it to all of my friends you don’t understandjshdkdhdgsgd /silly /but yeah i did do that XD

also you fazgang have been reblogging and liking my stuff 🐥 <- looks up at you like this chick

which,,,,thankie,,…🐥🐥😳💛✨

.-.

for you onlookers have some more posts by the fazgang (what the if-you-hms-gang call themselves) to gaze upon. you will not regret,,

.-.

i’ve noticed a trend that i often tend to write big paragraphs about a simple piece of art i’ve made, which is okay but i get the lack of interaction lol. im very proud of my art, and go on rambles on why i like it. the formatting i turn to aswell as the text and images almost turns the post into a collage? visually?? i love collages so it works out XD! but anyways,, im not upset over notes, i just like getting my art out there. so thank you to everyone whose viewed, read, liked, and followed for the ride :]. im glad you appreciate my stuff, it’s what i can offer <3. it won’t be consistently one fandom but im glad to not be alone in my interests. good god that sounded like a traumatized rant (maybe it was but:)

TLDR: check out if-you-heart/mind/soul :]! they are very cool and nice💛

[panlight]

hi!! i’m so sorry to keep sending you asks (if you get sick of it please just let me know and i’ll shut up i promise!! 💕💕)

so this is re: the cullens being in high school, as per the ask you answered a couple days ago! i also always thought it was super weird, and i’ve been thinking for a while now that a MUCH better cover story would for them all (even carlisle and esme) to be grad school housemates (i say this as someone who has now spent two years in grad school and is about to be there for another five at least lmaoooo)

here’s why i think it would work:

1. the age weirdness wouldn’t be as obvious bc people of all ages go to grad school (i started when i was 22 and had classmates in their 40s)

2. related to age, the visible/physical age also wouldn’t matter as much since some of my classmates (me included 😭😭) looked like we could still pass as high schoolers while others gave off huge “kids and a mortgage vibes” even if they were just like a year older

3. the whole looking “off” and tired thing is just like. the grad school Look™️. the shadows under the eyes and general gaunt-ish appearance honestly wouldn’t stand out that much and if somebody said something about them looking “off” or whatever, they could just be like “late night studying” and the other person would be like “lmao so true bestie”

4. if they pretended they were all renting space in the same big house (and carlisle and esme just acted a little less parental), the whole “dating each other” thing wouldn’t be that weird at all. i feel like it’s not that uncommon for couples who get along to rent different floors or sections of a house, and if they didn’t pretend to be one big weird family situation and instead just acted like they all met each other at school, i don’t think people would even bat an eye

5. people go to grad school forever. like. for so long (i vaguely knew of someone who was in the eighth or ninth year of her phd). esp if they picked something like a big state school where the “kids” could go to undergrad first, they could realistically do four years of undergrad, maybe a two or three year masters, and then a phd of indeterminate length (usually at least five). that would allow them to stay in the same place for at least 11 years

and this is not an official point, but i will note that for carlisle to still do his whole doctor thing, i think it would be perfectly reasonable for him to have already “graduated” or whatever, but continue to stay with his “friends” for financial reasons, or just bc the living situation worked for everyone

anyway, i’m so sorry this was so long, and honestly i bet someone has already said this somewhere before, but it just struck me when reading the “why tf are the cullens in high school” post that grad school would be such a great cover story for them

haha anyway thanks for putting up with my ramblings and thank you for all the lovely work you do on the blog!! 🥰🥰

I've definitely seen "just put them in college!" before (and I have made that argument myself) but I don't know if I've seen the grad school cover story specifically before!

It would allow Esme and/or Carlisle to be the 'peers' of their children rather than some sort of guardian or parental figures. They could, as you said, all be renting a house together and Esme could be studying architecture or getting a PhD in art history or whatever while the kids study who knows what. Maybe there's a medical school as well and Carlisle can go back (it still makes zero sense that Edward and Rosalie go "to keep him current' like how is that supposed to work? They come home and just recite from perfect vampire memory everything that happened in calls? Wouldn't Carlisle be keeping current by like, idk, actually being a doctor, reading journals, going to conferences, and continuing education?).

A group of friends renting a house together as a bunch of couples makes way more sense than two parents barely visibly older than their foster/adopted kids who all date each other.

And, honestly, it's probably a better use of their time to get actual advanced degrees rather than stopping at undergrad? I know because of secrecy how they use their knowledge and skills is somewhat fraught but like, publish papers under a false name or let someone else take the credit or something and you can still contribute to the world of academia.

[mylovesebastian]

Hello tumblr!!

This is my first post here, and it’s literally just going to be me rambling about why I love Sebastian from Stardew Valley. I started playing Stardew about 4/3-ish years ago and have over 550 hours on it so far and Sebastian is my favorite marriage candidate. Now I hope to post about all the marriage candidates and my thought on them, why I like them or stuff that feels off. Idk maybe I’ll make a tier list when I’m done.

Anyways! Sebastian, my love🖤 (can’t remember the name of the mod but thanks to my wife for providing the photo!)

So starting off with the basics, he’s emo. That’s hot… not much else to say.

People like to talk about how marrying the candidates can stop them from having the future they dream of, Alex being a big football(I know it’s different but y’know) player or whatever. However you don’t ruin Sebs plan, yes he says he wants to go to Zuzu city but that’s to move away from his family, and while yes it is not a big change he his still moving out. He is arguably much happier on a farm with a wife/husband/spouse that helps make money and treats him nicely than alone in zuzu city.

This isn’t as important, more of an observation. He has a gigantic hyper fixation on frogs. This man could sit there for hours and tell you about all 5,000-8,100 types of frogs there are (maybe, i don’t know and neither does google).

I freak out when people do fan art of him. Any fan art really, but specifically ones that give him facial piercings. They make me go feral, and I cannot describe the feeling that fills me when I see the art. He looks like he’d build legos for fun and display them on shelves.

Again, not important but I feel like he’d listen to Ghost and SleepToken. I’m totally not projecting but he doesn’t seem heavy metal all the way but likes songs and bands that go somewhere in between or have different types of songs. He also looks like he had a massive Greek myth phase but is embarrassed to talk about it. I mean not saying everybody who plays DnD had a Greek myth phase but he plays a game like DND… enough said.

Whenever I do a Sebastian save I feel like I have to do it with a cat. I think he likes all animals but would feel too tired having a dog. He’d like a black cat cause he thinks they’re underrated and over hated but he loves all cats.

Anyways, this started as more of a reasoning of why I liked him and turned into head canons I made up with my wife about him. I also hope to do this with all the marriage candidates and maybe even the other towns people and whoever, making different saves to get a full romance experience with the candidates but it might take a while. If you have a certain request for the next candidate please go ahead and give them, I’m happy to rant about one of my favorite games.

Thank you for reading!!🫶🏻🫡

[fukutomichi]

It’s review ramble rant tiiiiime! Decided to go on and post about my thoughts as the iron is still hot and my braincells are still firing. Lots of spoilers are gonna be in there and it’s looong as hell so you’ve been warned! Grab a cup of coffee or tea. Here we go!

Okay, the general feel about Season 2 is that it is slightly better than Season 1 for sure, better at some parts, but has shortcomings on others, BUT STILL, we got what we got and I think it was overall positive.

The first 3 episodes being aired was a direct response from the previous backlash that they had about Season 1 starting slow. And yes, those first 2 episodes were shaaaky as hell, but they found their feet in Episode 4 and then the series picked up with full steam ahead. This time to avoid this, they wanted to get the set up out of the way as soon as possible and then release at a weekly schedule. Was it a smart idea? It would have been. If the series was longer than 8 episodes? 

This latest trend of overblown streaming series with such small number of episodes, between A HUGE waiting period for each season, needs to stop. I get that the RoP crew would need more time, schedules with other actors, filming locations, building locations, writing, filming huge battle sequences, CGI. But I feel everyone is still chasing The Game of Thrones type of hype, and the studios need to realize that it ain’t happening anymore, not for a while. Just focus on making good stories with interesting complex characters and the viewers will come. Stop trying to make series be movies. I caught one of the directors in one of the BTS clips for Episode 7 saying “We’re not making series, we’re making movies” AND THAT’S THE BIGGEST PROBLEM. STOP DOING THAT. 

I would sacrifice all the big budget CGI sequences and wide beautiful shots for just a minute of conversation between Gil-galad and Cirdan. I don’t want “the Balrog shot that was 5 years in the minds of the showrunners”, I wanted people to see why Gil-galad respects Cirdan so much, instead of my non-reading Silmarillion friends asking me what’s his deal with him, and me having to explain that Cirdan is as close to a family member to the high king, that’s his adoptive dad. The series is very non-reading Silm friendly, but they somehow fail to explain some of the crucial relationships between characters. I KNOW there’s next season maybe they’ll expand on it, but some things like that need to be established IMMEDIATELY.

But with 8 episodes, what can you really focus on to adapt and show on the screen? This is why, AGAIN, stop making movies, we want a series. The biggest strength that a series has is CHARACTER DEVELOPMENT AND PACING. A series will always have the upper hand in that, and they are still trying to make a movie, cut in 8 parts. Please, arrange the pace for 10 episodes, so it doesn’t feel like one episode is laid back, and then the next one is rushing to the finish line. MAKE A SERIES, NOT MOVIES.

The thing that made Game of Thrones great those 4 first seasons was not the big battles or the CGI dragons. It was people talking in rooms. Their history and relationship with each other. Actors giving their A++ game with dialog which was moving the story. THAT made Game of Thrones worth the hype.

Learning about the fact that they have a change in the writers room can either be a good thing, with some storylines now being over and concluded so they might be preparing to change gears for Season 3, or with my mind going always in work corporate mode, writers not being payed as they should for their work so why stay…

The series did get a brush with the writer’s strike, which I will always support. YOU CAN’T HAVE A STORY WITHOUT GOOD WRITING! PAY YOUR WRITERS!! 

I think Episode 8 is where I felt some stuff were cut off and rushed, probably during the strike, that were set up in Episode 7, didn't land well. But I’ll get to that.

I started this in rant mode, but had to get it out of the way cause it bothered me the most. The series has SO much potential and it sometimes pains me to see fail on the most basic stuff. 

Okay, moving on with the juicy stuff now!

This season was The Charlies™ season, hands down. Absolute rollercoaster with Celebrimbor and Annatar/Sauron playing off each other on the screen. From the moment Sauron enters Eregion, to the final shot of him stealing Fëanor’s hammer. The showrunners were fully concentrated to that side of the story and, holy hell did they outdo themselves there. Charles Edwards as Celebrimbor needs to get some push for awards, or somehow ship one to him. I remember being a little a skeptic at first about his portrayal, since we got so little of him is Season 1, but as you rewatch it, you can see the foundations being set for his character. Season 2 is where he’s fully unleashed and, he is truly THE Celebrimbor. A sweet, sensitive soul that just strives to get out of his family’s shadow, by creating something unique that would be his legacy. A perfect victim for Sauron that finds his connection with Celebrimbor through that. I loved the fact that they filmed their scenes in order of the episodes and it shows the slow descent of both of their characters, helplessness and paranoia for Celebrimbor and Sauron barely managing his uncanny elf mask while trying to withhold annoyance and rage. Masterful acting by both. The last scene with them was MUCH more impactful than if we would have gotten the banner scene in the book. They started their pact alone in the forge, and they ended their manipulative partnership, alone in that same forge. With Celebrimbor getting the upper hand in death. Sauron AGAIN getting a knife straight into the heart, but with words instead of a pointy crown. Only this time, he won’t be able to get pay back for the insult. Because Celebrimbor in death, went where Sauron CAN NEVER go. The slow realization that he’s always gonna be a prisoner in his own cycle of violence. He has many names…And the cycle begins again.

Bless you Charles Edwards, thank you for being our Celebrimbor.

Charlie, be seeing ya next season you giggly perfect casting of Sauron’s messy character person you!

I was most excited to see were the elvish side of the story is gonna go after the end of Season 1, with the making of the three rings. And I think they did well! Robert Aramayo, I once again put myself on blast for ever doubting you as Elrond. My hubris must follow me till the end of this series. You have a shitty old phone, don’t know what a Brat Edit is and will never read this, but the universe will know of my foolishness. 

Elrond's feud with Galadriel HURT to watch. Those are two besties that want their best for each other and will protect each other no matter what. The rift that was going on between them and mending it in the last episode was so sweet, kudos to Morfydd as well for always bringing her A++ acting game. FINALLY we have a bit more of Gil-galad this season and IS STILL not enough. I ranted before about not a single blip of a Gil-Cirdan convo happening, but getting FREAKING BEN DANIELS for just a few scenes IS CRIMINAL!!! Also, still sad about that beard of his, he was already perfect damn iiiit.

I’m glad that we had this push and pull with the elvish rings, are they good are they bad, they are a new invention and the elves have no idea how to deal with them at first. Gil-galad and Galadriel’s visions were a nice representation of that. What are their power levels, what are they truly capable off. What I like to believe though, is that while Sauron had his hands on crafting the seven and the nine…guess who’s hands last touched the mithril that made the three. It was Elrond. With all his hopes and need to help his kind survive when he threw that nugget into the melting pot in the last episode in Season 1. And guess who wears those rings now? His closest family and the people he cares the most. When he finally decides to give Nenya a chance, we get to see the result of all his hopes and desire to protect those he loves the most in the last scene of this season. Rivendell. ELROND’S KINDNESS is the reason the elvish rings remain untouched by Sauron’s evil.

Galadriel vs Sauron. Oh! OH! I can only imagine Lúthien smiling and pointing at Galadriel, Sparta kicking him over the boulder. “That’s my girl! THAT’S MY GIRL! Wipe the floor with that bozo!!” If I’m being honest, spoiling myself with Bear Mccreary’s Season 2 soundtrack, listening to the track “The Last Temptation” gave soooo many vibes that something might happen to Galadriel that will leave me SHOOK, aka taking Sauron’s offer and Elrond being there to witness it, but Bear tricked meeee!!! She just fell through a tree! The clash was *chef’s kiss* though, Sauron constantly shapeshifting trying to mess with Galadriel’s feelings and even pulling the Halbrand puppy eyes card. But she wasn’t having it. Sauron gets denied, AGAIN.

Alexa, play Drive by The Cars for one dark lord. And conjure some of that sad rain again while you go waddle your way home to Mordor, you absolute clown.

HEAL YOURSELF. QUEEN.

We got more of the dwarves as well and the creation of the seven rings. I was a little disappointed that we got robbed of the Narvi and Celebrimbor friendship happening while making the Doors of Durin, but what can you choose to put in just 8 episodes, right? Sophia and Owain truly are such an amazing combo to watch as Disa and Durin, they did amazingly this season. I’m gonna miss Peter Mullan as King Durin, every scene with him and Owain was just beautiful and heart breaking. “Forgive me my son, King Durin”. I was choking in tears not even 5 minutes into the last episode. And will you look at that, forgiveness is the theme that starts off the episode, huh? 

The Uruk storyline…where do I even begin jfc. I went from Season 1 and loving Adar as an interesting unique character, to loving the entire Uruk story with its sad tragic end. Whoever was responsible for that, amazing job. 

I was sad when Jospeh Malwe left and his role was recasted. But HOLY SHIT, enter Sam Hazeldine and he just took that character to a new height. Adding more complexity, adding more black speech to his dialog, and being a representative of my favorite theme that I speculated is central to this season. Forgiveness.

The orcs being humanized was a great move imo. Because how else would we see the tragedy that is their entire kind being slaves to their own violent nature, that Adar sees past it, and Sauron can’t wait to exploit it. When Sauron tells Celebrimbor about the fall of Gondolin and the orcish blood rage I was FEASTING. THIS is how you introduce lore and expand on the history of the characters. They are a tragic invention of Morgoth, and yet are still sentient beings with names and feelings, that have been drilled and brainwashed about the fact that they’ll never be accepted by anyone, ever. Adar doing everything possibly wrong just to protect them, only to serve them right at Sauron’s feet as his new army. 

I’m sad that we couldn’t have had more of Adar’s character and he was absolutely full with potential, but he was doomed by the narrative from Season 1 and his actions had led to have little wiggle room for him to be left alive in the end. His last moments with Galadriel were beautiful. The very opposite of Sauron and Celebrimbor. He breaks from his cycle of violence and chooses forgiveness and peace. What happened after that though, was what we were supposed to be expecting about Adar's fate from the very first episode. Sauron never forgives and never lets a debt of insult go unpaid.

But what I DIDN’T like is the fact we never had a resolution between him and Arondir. Them stabbing each other and both of them still walking it off?? This is where the disconnect between episode 7 and 8 begins. Cause when they face off on the battlefield, you can see Arondir mouthing some words to Adar, but it must have been cut in the editing room. Adar was Arondir’s main reason why he lost everything and we will never have an appropriate closure between them I guess. Adar and Galadriel forgave each other, but he never asked Arondir for forgiveness. And we should have seen that. Instead, as one of my friends put it while we were gossiping about the last episode “And they just left Adar laying on that hill, huh?”

I want to believe he was Maglor, but hey, even with his elvish identity remaining a mystery, he still wanted the name he earned. I think that was nicely done.  They didn’t have the rights to the lore after all lol.

Sam Hazedine, I hope you get a huge bump up in your CV for playing such an amazing character and may you get other amazing acting roles in the future.

For now, what me and my friends group came up as a batshit “How do we still keep him in the series somehow” plan in 1am in the cafe drinking americanos, we figured he should apply to play as Glorfindel, but with a shaggy beard! Glorfindel is already half-maia at that point. He can get the wizard/elf vibes! Go with the grizzled dad look, no one will notice!! SEND YOUR CV, SAM!!

NÚMENOR!!! We’re slowly, but surely getting to the “and the island goes boom” storyline and ooooohhh I can’t wait. We’re getting hints of Isildur being the messy character that he is. As we slowly go through episode 3, we are hit with the biggest foreshadowing shot in the season, him basically seeing his own ending in the water. And what does he do there?? He steals from a dead man. He then meets and falls for a girl that’s already spoken for. What does he do? Tries to steal her too. Still riddled with guilt for the death of his mother, and using that to try to at least make up for it and cover his guilt with it. But this is Isildur we are talking about. Name a better combo than Isildur and bad decisions. But I love the fact that he was paired up this season with Theo. Similar experiences, both connecting through their loss. And I LOVE Theo’s arc so far, probably the character I’m most interested to see how his story will unfold. 

See, a friend of mine had an interesting theory that, while everyone is still going about Theo being either the Witch King or the King of the Dead…he might have another direction. What If Theo is Aragorn’s other side of the bloodline? Okay. Bronwyn falling for Arondir, human in love with an elf. Can you guess who has the same taste as well? Theo’s unknown lineage on his father’s side. It is almost as an open door to introduce the Dúnedain still living in Middle-Earth, and what better way to introduce them, then through Theo. A mainland Númenor vs. Númenor storyline? The paring of Isldir and him this season is also a hint. “The king’s hands are the hands of a healer”. And guess who’s the ONLY healer in Pelargir now? Theo ALWAYS choosing to stay with his people regardless if he’s been given a way out with either Arondir or Isildur…

Are we’re on to the showrunners or are they just throwing hints like this to lead people in one direction while they figure out his story? 

Back on the island, things are heating up for the Faithful vs. The Kings Men, and I’m here for the doomed story that is Miriel and Elendil. I’M HERE FOR IIIT!!! Pharazôn using both Kemen and Eärien as his tools to set himself on the throne was nicely done too. I was a little disappointed to see some Eärien hate going on though? Pharazôn, used her grief and anger for HIS means. After everything that her family goes through, she has the right to be angry and look for someone to blame. Why would she blame her father? He was under the queen’s orders, right? Grief makes you do terrible things and makes you blind, her respect for Pharazôn as the “smart” leader, falls right into Pharazôn’s hands in the right moment. And he uses it. He tries to turn her against her father too. BUT what does she do? SHE TRUSTS her father and goes AGAINST HERSELF to call the queen to help her save her Elendil, SHE KNOWS about their feelings for each other at that point, even if she doesn’t agree with it. Her love and loyalty to her family is stronger then everything Pharazôn threw at her. I never wanna see Eärien hate in the tags, as Galadriel says it best, heal yourself pls.

Kemen’s development on the other hand, I find really interesting. I get that he’s everyone’s favourite to hate right now, and Leon Wadham does an incredible job if people have such strong reactions to his character. Please don't be weird and don't harass him, he seems incredibly sweet compared to his RoP character. But there’s something really sad about him, you have this númenorian nepo baby that has everything on a golden platter, but the only thing he craves for is his father approval. And his father happens to be the worst person ever. He doesn’t want the scepter, he wants his father to have it. The moment he mentions to Pharazôn “us” he IMMEDIATELY cuts him off with a look and starts telling his own son how his dead mother had an ill prophecy about him. Cruel to the bone. And he blackmails him into telling it IF he does his bidding well. Of course, Kemen does a shit job at it, and we lost Valandil in the process, WHICH I DIDN’T EXPECT!!…BUT, I’m gonna take his death into advancing Kemen’s arc into a more villainous path, him arriving at Pelargir and seeing Isildur alive was such a moment, I had to cackle! The SINGLE PERSON RESPONSIBLE for the start of the domino effect of Númenor slowly going towards its downfall, turns up alive and is headed back home. Where Kemen killed his best friend, imprisoned his father, helped banishing his father, helped imprisoning Miriel and his sister is now target number one of Pharazôn. And Isildur saved Kemen’s life. Name a better combo than Isildur and bad decisions. 

Now, mentioning Valandil, I gotta rant about something else. And it’s about character deaths, especially for POC characters. Valandil dying, while not liking it, thinking it would happen much later when Númenor finally goes boom, it makes kinda sense for him to loose his life to Kemen, WHILE IN THE TEMPLE OF NIENNA. Lady of forgiveness, mercy and grief. Kemen even breaks her statue, which we should take as Kemen being beyond forgiveness. Advancing his character into a darker path. And then Nienna would be the first to forgive him lol.

But Rian?? Dying in the battle for Eregion like that? I get that her death represents a visual queue of the sheer evil and misery that is war. But, Vorohil surviving Boromor levels of arrows in his back, but not Rian? They couldn’t have switched their roles for that?? Rian being the messenger and Vorohil dying to protect his commander?? I’m kinda relieved that at least he survived from Elrond’s little party group, and Camnir is godknows where, but come on man. COME ON MAAAAN! Do better next time please, showrunners. If you introduce cool characters, at least don’t take them away like that, especially when they are POC.

And lastly…the Harfoot storyline. Oh boy. I don’t know if I’m in the minority, but for me this is probably this season's weakest point, A STARK difference from the previous season where I was invested the most. AND WE FINALLY GOT THE CONFIRMATION THAT HE’S GANDALF!! And it felt like, eh. We been knew.

This probably was the most cut storyline and felt like so many moments were missing. HAVING CIARÁN HINDS ONLY FOR A FEW SCENES!?! CRIMINAL!!! At least we got to see some Rhún scenery and got to see another clan of halflings. But the transition to the last episode felt like it lasted like 3 minutes, and then compare the previous season finale where everyone was still buttclenching if Halbrand or The Stanger was Sauron, right until the last conflict with the cultists! THAT was a nice ending of a climax. This season felt like they really didn’t want to bother with it anymore and now we have Gandalf going to Tom Bombadil, which is another perfect cast with Rory Kinnear, and Nori and Poppy leading the remaining Stoors, west. The gang is split. And it felt like a blip, compared to the goodbyes from the previous finale where emotions were high and you felt crushed and hopeful at the same time. But this storyline is now over, so that’s that.

I think that’s the overall general feelings for this season! Not going TOO much into detail, cause this will probably be a BEYOND long post lol.

Previous Personal MVP from Season 1 for me was definitively Daniel Weyman as GANDALF, having so little dialog, but using body language and emotions to act his way into the story. Season 2 MVP goes to Sam Hazeldine’s Adar. The dude swooped in and made the character his own and added so much more. To make me ROOT for the orcs? BLACK SPEECH making me emotional?! Unheard of!! Rest easy Uruk goth king, may you live in other people’s fanfics and be an inspiration for other amazing complex characters.

So…what do we expect now from Season 3 coming up?

Rivendell is coming up baybeeeeh!!! The first defensive bastion of the elves before the war with Sauron starts to heat up! Oh, that last shot was just beyond beautiful, BUT LIKE I SAID!! I would have had Ben Daniels just coming over and saying a few words than having that CGI shot. 

SO MORE CIRDAN NEXT SEASON, PLEASE!!!

I honestly have no idea where Galadriel’s arc is gonna be headed, but her connection to Sauron will always be there, now that she’s sort of marked? by his crown and the evil it’s made off, I wonder if it’s gonna come into play like Frodo when being stabbed by the Witch King’s blade. 

We didn’t get Celeborn as a surprise, and looking back, it was just impossible to get that. Season 1 and 2 are almost glued to one another and if you look at it from another side, it’s a full 16 episode season. This was basically Part 1….of The Rings of Power The Movie.

Hopefully more of the golden boi Gil-galad, give the man more twirling Aeglos moments, come on!! AND MORE GOLDEN FAM MOMENTS TOGETHER!! PLEASE. Some people still don’t know that Galadriel is Gil-galad’s auntie!! 

Sauron snatching Fëanor’s Hammer from Celebrimbor was VILE. And I loved it. He killed the only person talented enough to use it, and now he is left on his own to craft the final ring, by probably a) melting the hammer b) using it half-assedly and in the process messing up the One Ring so that’s why he ends up binding his entire life force to the Ring. BUT before he does that, he has the Nine Rings and he needs Nine Kings. So we’re on our way to seeing more Kingdoms of Men and that means we’re getting more casting announcements as the months go by. 

Pelargir!!! Theo being stuck with Kemen? Recipe for trouble. Hopefully Estrid gets some character development there, cause what we got so far from her was not enough imo. We’re already on our way to seeing the Ent’s promise getting broken. UGHH!! I don’t wanna see that, not when Episode 4 made me so emotional and is probably one of my favourites so far. We’re gonna get a clash with the Low Men vs Númenor for sure and this is where it starts.

We’re getting Khazad-Dum’s Game of Thrones!! NOOOOOO!! I don’t want them clashing with each other uughhh, especially family, but their fate is already written and it’s not gonna be a happy one. We will see if Durin will be tempted to use his father's ring as well. He did leave it to his son. So hoping they go for the emotions in that storyline. And in the mix there’s also the rift being open again between Durin and Elrond. And is it gonna get wider, or are we gonna see it mended next season? QUEEN DISA PLEASE PULL THROUGH!!

NÚMENOOOOR AGAAAAIN!! GOD there’s gonna be a lot of pain in there. And I was off with my prediction, we’re not getting Anárion this season, but we’re DEFINITIVELY getting Anárion next season!! Isildur coming home is gonna cause some chaos I’m sure, finding out pretty much like the pizza burning meme gif that A LOT of shit has happened during his absence. Are we gonna see a rift between Eärien and Isildur though? Her actions pretty much stem from his “death”, so it will be interning to see if the siblings clash or try to settle things first and find their dad and other brother. Pharazôn slowly setting himself up for the arrival of someone special AKA Sauron. We’re maybe still too far off from that plot, but as much as I enjoyed The Charlies™ and their scenes together, I CAN’T WAIT to see Charlie and Trystan being a combo act on screen. I LOVE Trystan’s portrayal as Pharazôn, he just oozes those charming but menacing vibes when he’s in his act. And to pair that up with Charlie? Which mask will he choose to manipulate him with? OH! CAN’T WAAAAIT!!

And then again lastly, as each season and episode, the Harfoots and Gandalf. It was nice to see that we’re getting the lore about how the halflings find The Shire, so we’ll probably gonna follow them on their travels to the west, and hopefully they meet some of the other key characters from the series. At some point, most of the characters HAVE TO HAVE A BRIDGE to meet up, instead of getting multiple separate stories. Hopefully Season 3 is that. Gandalf being mentored by Tom Bombadil in Rhún while the other wizard is still on the loose. The showrunners did confirm that Cirian is not Saruman, so that makes him one of the blues that failed their mission. They can go aaaanywhere with this storyline, but they better bring it up closer to Sauron and Galadriel. If they wanna show us the connection between Galadriel and Gandalf, and why Gandalf fears Sauron so much, I think Season 3 is the best point to start.

And that's pretty much it I guess.

Now the painful wait of TWO FREAKING YEARS begins for Season 3.

I'm gonna try to stay as active as possible with my gifs and plan out some sets, maybe including some of the other acting gigs of the other RoP actors, like my "Hazeldine cope mechanism for Thursday" sets, if my time allows it. But time is all we have now.

September flew by for me with this series. Like, 28th of August was two weeks ago, right?

So what are we doing next Thursday?

[acidichcl]

My babies

Was playing around a lil with how i draw them

Anyways, im bored so below is just me rambling about my tmnt fan iteration

If ur gonna read it, be warned, it’s long 💀 i tend to yap alot. I’ll make a clearer post once i figure everything out lmao

I guess i’ll start by explaining the background of it all

Baxter stockman found a crystal near an alien crash site and he found it super pretty, he wanted to give it to april’s mom, who he fancied. At the time, he didnt think much of it. He just thought it was a regular pretty crystal that was probably formed because of the crash impact or something.

(Little comic about this) As baxter gives the crystal necklace to april for her to give to her mom, april ends up giving it to Leo instead because april doesnt like her mom and refuses to give any gifts to her. Leo wears the crystal necklace in gratitude for April and on that night, leo had something happen to him. It’s like something from the necklace is taking over his body. That something is basically the crystal’s energy getting embedded to his body, this includes a hologram being (like an AI i guess) that is part of that crystal

This hologram being is what u call a Chronix. Chronixes are blue hologram AI beings that usually take a dragon-like form. Chronix doesnt immediately show itself to Leo, as just like any other virtual assistant, it only shows up when needed. When the crystal’s energy was embedded to Leo, he just thought that it was somehow Donnie’s mischievous doing. Maybe he was experimenting with things and Leo got caught in the way. Leo quickly dismissed it and went on with his day after Donnie gives Leo a device that would help tame the energy surge.

One day, a bunch of utroms have been spotted roaming around the town. While April was still sleeping, an utrom managed to get into april’s place through an open window and climbed onto leo, causing him to freak out and accidentally spawn a holographic whip that would break April’s shelf of her beloved figurines. Leo begged Donnie to fix everything and he also tells Donnie that the device he gave isnt working. Donnie agreed to fix the issues and he tells Raph to distract April, and Mikey to help clean up the mess a bit. While Donnie is fixing up his device, Leo is sitting alone in his room, wondering what actually is happening to him.

Prompted by Leo’s question about what’s happening, Chronix appears and tells him that the energy surges he’s getting are because he’s not used to it yet. His body is not trained enough to be a container for the energy nor to gain better control of what he spawns. Chronix explains further about what it is and where it came from: The utroms have a very advanced living condition and what keeps their conditions alive is a sun crystal that powers everything in their planet. It is linked to everything there and it casts virtual assistants to serve the utroms. As they were fleeing their planet that’s about to be taken over by shredder, the utroms took the big crystal with them as its huge energy source is believed to be able to form a new world and Shredder will have his own loyal army. When the utroms fled with the crystal, they crashed to earth, causing the crystal to shatter to multiple pieces. Those who came to check out the crash site notice these crystal fragments and take them, either its for collection, or for profit purposes, or for research, whatever. Ppl just like shiny things. The utroms are trying to gather all the pieces to form the crystal whole again to restore their home planet, while shredder, and other alien invaders, are also actively trying to seek out for this crystal for power.

As Leo is one of those who is in possession of the crystal, he is now a target, hence why an utrom climbed up onto him that morning. Now knowing that he’s not supposed to be in possession of the crystal, he tries to take off the necklace but he is now bonded with the crystal so he physically can’t take it off. The crystals dont have the same effects on other living things tho. I'll tell why eventually in future posts.

To avoid any more accidents, he asks for chronix’s guidance on how to make his body stronger to contain and be more in control. Chronix tells him that he just needs to train n stuff. For better guidance, he tells his brothers. And then april, who then mentions that there’s a dojo nearby and thats where they meet casey jones and his grandpa who owns a pet rat, Splinter, who shortly gets in contact with an utrom and gets mutated. Also the grandpa’s pretty old so he passes away not very long after. Casey is still too young to continue his legacy, but splinter is now an old wise rat who knows of the grandpa’s techniques. So splinter takes the sensei role to initially train only leo and casey, but the other turtles and april also wanted to join in just to have something to do

Yeah

[scarlet-cookie]

Doksoo short angst fic (51!KDJ and “HSY”)

Based on the third part of this post by @lialox

[Kim Dok ja]

The fourth wall’s voice came in and out randomly, as if it was also running out of things to converse about.

Which regression turn was it, now?

I couldn’t remember.

I closed my eyes. A blurry vision of Yoo Joonghyuk sleeping soundly on a quiet night with his companions surrounding him came to mind.

He was asleep, huh..

My sight returned back to the empty subway. 

I thought about Yoo Joonghyuk’s companions around him again.

…

Deep down, did I wish my companions were here, as well?

It would hurt them.

My stories were still slowly floating out the window. Perhaps, by the end of this turn, I would truly forget all of my memories.

A tingling sensation began to creep up my chest. It was a thought.

[N ot a go od ide a]

The fourth wall spoke, as if knowing in an instant what I was going to do.

I let out a faint chuckle.

“But if I don’t do it now, will I ever be able to say those words again?”

The comments I wanted to make on the Ways of Survival one last time.

I slowly drew in a deep breath.

[Bookmark “Director of the False Last Act” has been activated!]

The memories I recalled about Han Sooyoung. Both of the one I knew, and the one who saved me. Tls123. The memories I had of them began to slowly float up to the surface of my consciousness.

“Who do you think…”

“A very big baby..” 

“You, you…”

“You better read it…”

“Even if it’s over three thousand chapters…”

Some memories I recalled vividly, some I weren’t sure if it was just my imagination. Nonetheless, all those moments began to converge into one single avatar.

A figure slowly materialized in front of me. A tiny portion of my stories sank into that figure.

A young woman of short stature, her dark hair flowing down to just about her shoulders. A beauty mark beneath her right eye. The white coat that fitted over her body. 

I stared up at that figure’s dark eyes.

[Due to the “Most Ancient Dream”’s blessing, the skill’s application period has been changed to infinite.]

I wished this moment could last forever, too.

“Hey, why are you crying!?”

The avatar behaved exactly like how I expected Han Sooyoung would. She removed the lemon candy sticking out of her mouth and shoved it hurriedly down her pocket. She then picked out another one from somewhere.

“Hey..”

That lemon candy wasn’t forcefully stuffed in my mouth. Instead, she simply bent down and handed it to me.

One of my hands was still holding onto the phone, and the other was covering my face. Han Sooyoung’s concerned expression deepened.

“Tch.. guess I’ll have to do it myself.”

She carefully unwrapped the candy and waved it over my mouth.

“Say ahh.”

Was it because I looked like a child now? I couldn’t help but get slightly annoyed. Nonetheless, I decided to play along.

I opened my mouth as she placed the candy on my tongue.

The lemon candy had no flavor.

Han Sooyoung threw herself onto the seat next to me with a thud, patting my hunched over back softly.

[The fourth wall is shaking!]

[The fourth wall is shaking..]

[The fourth wall…]

After a while, the messages slowly disappeared. Maybe that guy decided to go away for a while.

“What’s wrong, huh?” Han Sooyoung asked, snapping me out of my short trance. She looked down at the phone in my hand.

“You’re reading it again?”

This time, instead of sounding annoyed, she sounded rather gleeful.

I nodded softly. “Yeah.”

Han Sooyoung smirked.

“It was a really great story, isn’t that right?”

The phone I held fell onto the cold floor with a soft thud. Tiny pieces of glass broke off from the screen, but I couldn’t care less.

I’d said something like that before, didn’t I..?

I nodded again, biting down on my dry lips.

“Yeah.”

“What do you think about it?” 

I couldn’t stop myself now. The words began to flow out of my mouth like water bursting out of a broken dam. The words I’d always wanted to tell her, the author. The comments I could no longer write. 

As I kept rambling on and on, her expression shifted along with my energy. She laughed when I got upset, and sarcastically consoled me at the parts that saddened me. 

One thing was consistent, though.

She would smile whenever I mentioned I loved this story more than anything.

I couldn’t tell how much time had gone by. I kept talking as my stories kept floating away. Is this what they mean when they say “time flies by when you’re having fun”?

I’d stop at certain points to catch my breath. Whenever that happened, I’d notice our reflection on the subway window. A young woman with a child whose clothes are too large for his body, both wearing the same white coat like a bring-your-parent-to-school day silly getup. Han Sooyoung would notice what I was seeing, too.

“You look horrible in that.”

But in my eyes, all I saw was a child talking away happily to his guardian.

I smiled.

“I know.”

As the time kept going by, I began to grow tired.

Of talking.

Even though I still had a million more words to say to her.

Han Sooyoung’s soft hand rested on my head, hastily brushing away my loose hair. Without another word, she pulled my small head down to rest on her lap.

There was no familiarity in this feeling. It was strange.

“Sleep, Kim Dokja.” She muttered, slowly removing her hand. My legs were still folded up on the seat awkwardly. She shook her head, as if disappointed. “Stretch your legs!”

I did as she told, letting my legs stretch along the seats. I remember counting the seats each time I was in this position. Originally, it was roughly five seats. Now, it was barely three.

Her dark eyes glanced at me again.

“Seriously…” she grumbled. “Do you need a lullaby or something to sleep? Why am I asking this.. but you’re a child, after all.”

She seemed to direct that last line as a joke.

I shook my head.

Han Sooyoung chuckled to herself, resting her chin on the hand that wasn’t caressing my head.

“Of course you don’t. You’d listen to stories. And only one, for that matter. How stubborn..”

Then, she began recounting the tales of Ways of Survival.

Did Han Sooyoung used to do this?

I had asked myself that question numerous times over since the moment I began talking to “Han Sooyoung”.

If the avatar was truly generated from my memories, then..

Then…

Then how could she be doing things I don’t even expect her to do.

My thoughts came to a halt when she began to recount my favorite part.

Whatever it was, I’d rather relish this moment, even if it’s just for a second more.

I slowly fell asleep listening along to her voice.

…….

When I woke up, the subway was empty again.

I must’ve unknowingly deactivated the skill when I was asleep.

In the dream, I continued to watch Yoo Joonghyuk’s regression turn.

But this time, “Han Sooyoung”’s voice accompanied me.

The author that originally breathed life into this world.

Just to keep a single person alive.

I stared down at my hands, the ends of it still breaking away into the distance.

My stories were leaking out at a much faster pace than before.

[Sl e pt we ll?]

The fourth wall’s voice returned. 

I couldn’t answer it.

In a way, it must’ve been one of the best night’s sleep I’ve ever had in my life.

I opened my mouth to say something, but no words came out.

The fourth wall sighed.

[St i ll c ry ing]

…….

Han Sooyoung, who was now in the 1865th turn, was standing guard for the other companions as they slept out of exhaustion. She stared up at the night sky, trying to find the star that shone the brightest.

Just now, she had a rather silly thought, that perhaps that guy would’ve created another avatar to accompany himself in that train. Maybe that avatar would look like her. Maybe that avatar would be patient enough to listen to his ramblings about the story he loved the most. Maybe that avatar would’ve taken care of him in her stead, at least for now.

She felt a small tear forming at the corner of her eye.

“What am I thinking…” 

She shook those thoughts off.

“But that guy would definitely do such a thing.”

[deardiary1899]

king of new york is a catchy af song but i like to think it emphasizes something about race

i always found it as something that represented their wants and are somewhat expressions of them internally--

Race: A pair o' new shoes with matchin' laces <- Race wants something practical? I mean, in some productions, his socks don't even match!!!!!

Romeo: A permanent box at the sheepshead races <- Surprisingly, Race was supposed to have this line but was changed in the Broadway production. It's one of the main things I found interesting in the lyrics.

and, honorable mention to Davey:

Davey: A regular beat for the star reporter!

Davey's kindness is shown here. He prefers to move the attention to Katherine, and what he wants is never really mentioned

Anyhow, Ive read from another post that the boys are sharing these things according to what the other person likes, and that, is very cute and i love it, but I unfortunately cannot see it that way myself when it's with Race. Romeo may have said that line for Race, but, the lines Race sings in Carrying the Banner sort of correlates with his lines in KofNY. The said Race's lines in CtB are as follows:

Curdled Coffee / Concrete Donuts / Sprinkled with mold / Homemade / Biscuits / Just two years old

I am a true believer that the lines characters are chosen to sing are important to who they are, and I will find it endlessly curious as to why these are the specific things Race would list out, when most of the newsies at this part, something they want/that's currently happening/general observations or whatever. It's just so,,, curious to me how he speaks of THOSE things?? they're definitely not something they want, and it's poetic as FUCK??? like WHO hurt you mr higgins

It makes me think of Race as someone who is somewhat practical. I mean, outside of being sort of rowdy, excitable and the like, he's, without a doubt, smart af and like his historical counterpart, quite aware.

Race: Am-scray, punk / She's the king of New York!

Katherine: Whod'a thunk! I'm the king of New York!

Newsies: We was sunk, pale and pitiful

Katherine: Bunch'a wet noodles

Katherine & Newsies: Pulitzer's poodles!

Les: Almost about to drown in the drink

Buttons: When she fished us out

Race: And drowned us in ink!

Am-scray is one of my favourite parts here. Maybe because it was sung by Race but It’s Pig Latin.

I have NO Idea how common it is to learn that in the 19th century– but considering in Newsies (not as historically accurate) the boys don’t get a proper education other than Davey (but in a more historical perspective, they did. somewhat.), It’s EXTREMELY important to me how he knows such words like ‘Hoi-polloi’ (GREEK!!!), Am-scray and Gratis (LOOK i dont know how common words like that are, because im not a native english speaker and DAMN i don't know the usual 19th century lingo, but to me, it was a big big word)

Even more, his wit is shown well in the line ‘and drowned us in ink’. I’ve been obsessed with that since I heard it, and I’ll never get over how it is a BEAT that you can skip to in writing. It’s such a smooth and witty way to say that Katherine’s writing had helped them, and that ‘drowning in them in ink’ led them to get the fame they got (front page of the papers).

It’s also bitterly sweet to note that seeing their faces on the front page was more than enough to have them all tap-dancing, and although they may be forgotten the next day, it was all the worth.

this is all over the place, and moreso a ramble, but I REALLY wish we got more of Race because these specific things keep repeating in my mind ALL the time. I would ALSO like to state that Race was a HUGE driving force in this. I could write a WHOLE essay about him but kiss his ass and slap it because after getting hit around by oppressors and police, he knew they needed at least a moment of relief !!!!!!

TL;DR: I have a crush on Race Higgins and I need him real NOW

[delineate-creates]

With the recent DDOS attack on AO3, I’ve seen some people sharing epubs of the fics they’ve downloaded. I’m a BIG fan of downloading fics — not just for situations like these, but for the pure fun and convenience of it! I love highlighting and making notes for all my favorite parts, and if the mood strikes me, I’ll even bust out Calibre and transfer them to my kindle with their own little custom covers.

The day before my last big road trip, I decided to do some very quick cover art for a few fics I had in my downloads. I wasn’t originally planning on posting them, but I thought maybe if someone else had saved these fics recently, then they might wanna use them too. These are all tomarry and all fantastic! ☺️

Fics pictured:

Kisses Cursed by @paper-ramblings

What Souls Are Made Of by Emeralds_and_Lilies

Lover’s Spit by @pinktom and @k3uuu (note the content warnings but PLEASE god read this one!!!! 😭)

***If any of you authors actually prefer not to have your fics downloaded, please let me know and I’ll edit this post. Don’t wanna step on any toes! 🖤***

[polkadot358]

I made some sprites and boss battle animations heavily based on the content made for the john loves you au by @zzoupz and @salmonandsoup . Big props to them for creating and expanding this au along with every other contributor who helped get my creative juices flowing! 

I have tagged it but just in case !!FLASHING LIGHTS!! for the gif below

Details, ideas and ramblings on the sprites are below the read more!(I am warning you that it is long and that this is my first time posting)

All sprites are facing to the right and are supposed to be the walking downwards sprites.

John: 

For John and Gary I just swapped around their bodies and kept their arms so that their silhouettes would be the same (or at least similar) to the ones in the Faith game. This made them a lot easier to design alongside the fact Zoup gave them distinguishable features (thank you!). The first sprite is John cloaked, second is uncloaked and third is his ‘action move’ like the one in game when he holds up his cross. 

For his phase 1 transformation I like to think this is when Gary and Amy are properly kicking his ass and Buer does not like that so John starts to fervently pray to his “angels” to save him. They do but start to transform John as they feed off his fear of failing his “God” and of being killed by Gary and Amy. As the protagonists deal with the “angels” John escapes (to mirror canon!Gary’s fight and highlight John’s cowardice) and prays in his private sanctuary where he can directly speak to “God”. 

Amy and Gary catch up, leading to John’s phase 2 transformation where Buer has had enough and directly possesses John at the peak of his terror, fully transforming him. You may notice in this transformation that John’s blood forms a cross, I did this because of  ~symbolism~. The flashing yellow references when canon!John first received the golden cross from Father Allred in the Martin house when his faith was strongest. For swap!John he is literally being given the cross directly into his chest and his faith is also at its strongest, although it’s out of pure blind faith to his “God” from fear rather than it being a conscious decision. It’s kinda mocking the canon flashing but its use still means “John” is becoming stronger. Also, the reason the antlers move is cuz I read an interview with Airdorf where he said he liked to keep his demons abstract to allow the human mind to make it horrifying. I know he was referring to the shapes of the demons but I took it and made the antlers move to allow people to think “oh, are those antlers or bloody hands?” Clever, maybe, I dunno.

Gary:

I’ll repeat what I said above but I just swapped John and Gary’s bodies and kept the arms the same. I made Gary look like he was wearing a cassock, gave him his hat and cane and voila, it’s his first sprite. His second sprite is his ‘action move’ where he whips out his bible and leans on his cane. salmonandsoup said how the AU would be a two player game, I could see this being done by giving Gary and Amy individual strengths and weaknesses. Gary would be a slow mover but would be the only one able to fully kill demons with his biblical knowledge. Amy would be speedy and could hold items but would only be able to stun or ward away demons.

Amy:

Humans in the Faith game all have that stick figure look outside of Garcia and Allred who get to be a bit knobbly. This is why Amy has a pretty basic look but I gave her some knobbly-ness in her arms as reference to her canon design and attempted to give her some shoulder length hair, this is her first sprite. Her second and third sprites give light to the idea I talked about in Gary’s section where she would be the item keeper. These aren’t her ‘action moves’ though cuz I imagine her swinging the crowbar around and maybe lifting the lamp higher.

Lisa:

The first sprite is based off of canon!Amy and canon!Lisa designs. I gave her that hanging hair that canon!Amy has and used canon!Lisa’s skinny and less connected arms to inform the rest of her limbs to make her more demonic looking. For the second sprite I made it closer to Zoup’s design for Lisa, giving her more wild hair and clawed hands.

Miriam: Another original look, I wasn’t too sure if she was a nun in this AU but gave her the mask that salmonandsoup mentioned based off of her face in her canon design. I decided to give her a nice grandmotherly silhouette, making her shorter than her canon sprite, giving her a bun and a nice dress to tie it together. Overall, just a sweet old lady with good posture. 

Garcia:

The least inspired of the bunch. I just took the hooded design of canon!Gary and slapped Garcia’s arms on there. I gave him his canon colouring even though the cloak should be blue because his grey head did not mix well with the blue clothing in his second sprite. Sorry, Garcia, at least he looks kinda like the grim reaper.

Last thing, I promise! I thought about the themes that the swap AU game could explore that would contrast those made in the OG Faith game. The AU game could explore how limiting faith that is too extreme can be or how faith can become twisted compared to the originals message that through strong and pure faith anything can be overcome. These are ideas that salmonandsoup and vendettapandav have talked about I just think they deserve to be key themes.