#maybe i should take comms for these 👀

[lordrandreaming]

When you go manic at 12am and start making a small plush (by 4:00am he was done)

[the-kipsabian]

i got so excited about getting an email that my stamps have shipped

is this what being an adult is like?

[midnightdevotion]

Hang in There

Request: Hi I saw you opened and requests and I can’t stop thinking about Rooster finding fem reader passed out somewhere after training because she’s pregnant with Hangman’s baby 👀 Maybe she’s been off a while and hangman is still ✈️

a/n: hi guys! it's been forever since i posted something- i will update all my fics soon just needed some inspo from requests to get my mojo back. Thanks for understanding loves.

Pairing: Jake Seresin x female reader(Callsign Daisy)

Life has a way of kicking your ass in unexpected ways. After waking up sick for two weeks in a row you went to the doctors, only to find out you were pregnant. 8 weeks pregnant no less.

Now your approaching 10 weeks and you still don't know how to process that your pregnant, let alone tell your boyfriend. You know you want kids, but this is definitely not how you envisioned it happening.

The fear of telling Jake and losing him for this is something that has you up all night, every night. You can't help but thank you're lucky stars he's been on a mission for the last month because after waking up sick every day and hardly sleeping from the stress of it all, he would've figured you out. He should be getting home later today and you don't know what to do.

Logically, you know that while he plays the part of jackass cocky pilot, he worships you, and he would never be so low to leave you and your baby. His Texas roots would never let him. However, you're pregnant so your hormones don't let you settle the anxiety with logic.

Flinching as a door slams it knocks you out of the anxious spiral that has been your mind for the last few weeks.

"hey daisy you ready to kick some ass today?"

"when am I not" you send what you hope is a convincing smile towards rooster. You move around him grimacing as you walk into the sweltering southern California heat.

___

If there's one thing you can count on, flying is the one thing that gets you out of your head. It takes away all your fear and keeps you exactly in this moment. Nothing outside of being in the pilot seat matters. Not being pregnant, not every stress that comes with it being unplanned, and certainly no anxieties about what comes next.

There's no space for any of that. The second you climb that ladder, your life and everything about it falls away.

Today you are just running team trainings, and they are always your favorite. You have no upcoming mission scheduled so it's just to keep your skills refined and ready for when there is a mission.

"hey daisy, you know it's not fair when they team you up with Rooster, you should just let us win" coyote's voice crackles over the comms.

"Coyote how will you ever get better if I don't humble your ass every time i can?" your sarcastic reply echos back.

"C'mon just once! I've got a date tonight and I want to brag about being the winner"

"Tsk tsk you should know women don't want to hear you brag on the first date coyote. Maybe this is why you never get a second date."

"You can't seriously tell me the girl dating hangman told me not to brag right now."

Laughter crackles through from everyone, and you shake your head. Rooster gives you a signal and you move to his left ready to attack.

If there's one thing the dagger squad knows it's that when you and rooster fly together there is ultimately little to no chance for survival. Nobody expected the duo with callsigns rooster, and daisy to be such a lethal pair but you guys can read each others minds.

This is true on the ground too, which is why you've been avoiding rooster for two weeks. You know he can tell something is up, but if you avoid him, he can't figure out what.

"how quick do you think we can get them out today?" Roosters voice rasps.

"I reckon we will have them grounded in t-5 minutes"

"god not you too with the Texas talk" he groans.

"What you don't think it's charming?" he flips you off and you laugh.

Before you can respond you see coyote and payback flying. Dropping back to cover rooster you grin under the face mask. This is your favorite part of everyday.

Being up in the air with your best friends you feel invincible. Which is ironic considering this is actually a dangerous job.

"rooster, plan c"

"roger that" He goes shooting forward and you fall back. You laugh as you watch them chase rooster, it's symbolic in a way kids chase chickens and then get pecked.

You stay behind them until you move to get a shot. The sweet sound of missile lock rings out and payback drops off. Now that Coyote is onto you, the plan changes, and you become the bait.

You and Rooster know that he wants to air 'kill' you the most, which is why this plan will work. The temptation of you being right there will be too much for him to think about where rooster disappeared too.

So when rooster swoops in and gets the missile lock on coyote, you can't help but laugh. You and rooster devised this plan specifically for Coyote because he always complains when you two are teamed up together. So seeing it come to fruition and even better hearing Coyotes swearing, is the highlight of your day.

Grinning as you climb down from your jet, you search out rooster. You see him hopping onto the tarmac and walking over your way.

"roos we killed that!" you shout out at him. When you feet hit the tarmac, a rush swoops over you. Shaking it off you go to take a step and suddenly the world spins incredibly fast. Yet it feels like everything is going in slow motion, your vision goes spotty and you hear Rooster shout after you. The last thing you register before the world goes black is the sound of boots hitting the ground.

--

Rooster has never felt more scared to make a phone call in his life. How does he call Hangman and tell him that his girlfriend passed out, and is in the hospital bay when he has no idea why.

It's been four hours already, you haven't woken up and they won't give him any answers. His hair is a mess from stressing about his best friend not being okay while simultaneously worrying about how to tell the guy he knows would move heaven and earth for you.

His leg is bouncing up and down as he stares at the number dialed on his phone screen.

The fact of the matter is Hangman is probably still flying and won't be able to be contacted for a few more hours. The mission was a success, and then it was extended to have them run drills while at sea.

Bradley knows he has to make the call, but he's terrified that once he does it all feels more real. He's terrified to lose his best friend, He's lost enough already.

Sighing he rubs his hands down his face, picks back up his phone and hits the green call button. The ringing feels like the worst anticipation of his life. When it goes to voicemail his hands are shaking, and he doesn't know what to say so he just hangs up.

Next resort is to call the ship. A commander on board will contact hangman and deliver the bad news, and oh how he wanted to avoid it coming from anyone but him.

He feels a hand land on his shoulder, looking up and glancing at Mav he sighs.

"It's going to be okay Bradley"

"How could you possibly know that" Maverick sighs, and sits next to him.

"let me make the call." maverick opens his hand for him to hand him the phone.

"no- no I need to be the one.. just what do I say mav"

"you tell him the truth, you don't know yet what happened, she's stable but the doctors are finding out what happened and he needs to get back as soon as he can"

He swallows and it feels like steal is coating his throat. Nodding as he stands up he paces in front of mav.

"she's gonna be okay, she has to be okay. We take risks every day all day up in those jets, this can't be how she goes mav. She has to be okay."

"and she will be, but take a deep breathe and find yourself because when you get ahold of Seresin he needs you to be his rock, he doesn't need to hear you panic" Rooster sighs because Maverick is right. He grabs his phone and dials the ships emergency contact number.

It takes a few minutes, jumping through hoops, getting in contact with one person to be transferred to another. Rooster curses Jake for being so hard to get ahold of.

"This is warlock"

"Admiral, sir, this is Lieutenant Bradshaw. There's been an accident with Lieutenant y/l/n today and we need to get contact with Lieutenant Seresin."

"Jesus- is everything okay?"

"We're not really sure yet sir but Jake- he needs to know."

"He's in the air at the moment let me see if i can get him back on ship."

"thank you sir"

The minutes feel like hours as rooster is waiting. He hears chatter from his phone and he knows they are trying to get hangman back on the ship and available for the phone call but roosters not sure if he isn't ready to deliver the news or ready to get it over with.

What feels like an eternity later but is actually only twenty minutes he finally hears hangman in the background. He swallows hard.

"Rooster whats going on?" if there's one thing pilots know, they are never called down unless something bad happened.

"Jake. Something happened with daisy... she... she just passed out.."

"in the Air?!! Rooster tell me shes okay!"

"No no! not in the air.. we had just landed and i was walking over to her and she passed out. She's in the med bay now but we haven't heard anything about her condition yet."

"Fuck!..... Fuck!" in the background he hears jake asking how far from land they are. Ultimately needed to be there for you, needing to see you for himself. Bradley hears jake curse when the answer is still 3 hours out.

He hears a slam and then yelling before the line clicks dead. Rooster looks at maverick worried.

"what do you think he's gonna do"

"one way or another? getting a jet and flying here faster." is mavericks reply. Rooster can't help but agree, if he was 150 miles away from land on a boat that moves about 50 mph holding jets that move at 1,000 mph then he knows what option he would choose too.

----

It takes about 30 minutes for hangman to come rushing into the hospital bay.

"How is she, have we heard anything, what happened" He rapid fires off questions.

"the doctor came out and told us she passed out because she's sleep deprived and is showing signs of dehydration and that she hasn't eaten anything today."

"why- why hasn't, she knows she needs to eat- she's so good with drinking water... I don't understand." confusion crosses his fingers because none of that sounds like his girlfriend.

"when can i see her?"

"the doctor is going to come out soon and let us know what room she is in, they had to finish the tests to see if everything is okay."

Hangman nods and paces the floor where rooster paced about calling him. It only takes a couple minutes for a doctor to come out and call your name and everyone shoots up.

"Okay, well, I'm glad she has a support system but only one visitor at a time please, she does still need to rest and recover. She is in room 302"

Hangman takes off in a dead sprint towards the room.

---

Beeping is the next thing your mind registers, and it takes you a minute to open your eyes. Yawning you try to bring your hands up to rub your face but one is being held by something.

Looking over you see Jake studying your left hand.

"you know you scared the shit out of me today"

"Jake I-"

"why weren't you taking care of yourself?" this has you confused and furrowing your brows.

"I have been-"

"You were dehydrated, hadn't eaten and sleep deprived. It's why you passed out!"

"jake you've been gone! You don't know what I've been doing! I did eat breakfast and drink water this morning but I threw it up!"

"god darling daisy if your sick don't come to work!"

"I'm not sick!"

"some would say puking means your sick!"

"not when your pregnant!"

"you- you're pregnant?"

"Yes Jake! I've been throwing up for weeks because of stupid morning sickness and I haven't been sleeping well because oh my god I'm pregnant and that is the scariest thing, and I was worried to talk to you about it but I guess that's out now isn't it." Theres a silence that lingers on after your words, and it feels like ice pumping into your heart the longer it stretches on.

"oh- oh my god" your throat feels thick at his words, he's looking down at your still clasped hands and you watch him to gauge his reaction.

"we're having a baby?" he finally looks up at you and his eyes are welling with tears.

"yes- we're having a-" and your cut off by his lips crashing against yours. His laughter peels out of him as he pulls away.

"were having a baby!"

"wait... you're happy about it?"

"Of course I'm happy about it! You're the love of my life! I want everything with you. The house, the kids the marriage, the dogs the fights, and the stress"

His words make your eyes tear up.

"honey I hate that you were so stressed about telling me you weren't sleeping. I was sitting here, looking at your left hand thinking about how wrong it is that something happened and the doctors didn't immediately call me, that if something were to happen to one of us I never got the chance to put my ring on your finger." His words left you speechless.

"jake... what are you saying"

"I'm saying marry me."

"isn't that supposed to be a question?"

"No. Its a demand, marry me, make me the happiest man, have my babies and marry me and call me out on my shit and shoot me down in the sky I want it all. I know this is so not how i planned to ask you, but please, marry me." You laugh a wet laugh, because this makes sense, you two would get engaged in the weirdest way, and do it all out of order, but you love this man with your whole heart so you embrace the chaos.

"Of course I will marry you" and he kisses you with every emotion he's felt in the last few hours, but you both wouldn't change it. Even if he already has the ring at home in his sock drawer waiting for the perfect moment.

Tag list:

@alanadetigy 

@luckyladycreator2 

@multiplefandomsmess 

@tkmarvel-divergentbish

@ohh-to-be-a-frog

@roosterschanelslut

@americaarse

@malindacath

@atarmychick007 

@trikigirl271

@lustfulseonghwa

@smoothdogsgirl

@elenavampire21

@captainmarvelnerd

@averyhotchner

[starpains]

I'm curious about the AI Au 👀

gskfjdlsa

It's an AU that I started writing months ago, and was very excited about, but then suddenly I got very demotivated for various reasons. I still love the idea though, and I AM going to finish it one day.

The fic takes place in the GFFA, but Anakin is not a Jedi in it, or even human. In fact he's a very (very) realistic android. Obi-Wan is a jedi and gets stranded in space. It makes him find a planet in wild space nobody knew existed which is something out of Westworld (the HBO show), where realistic androids with feelings are made to be used however people like.

Since I've written around 5k of the fic already, I am able to share sth, which will be the very first bit of the fic:

---

So, this is how I die, Obi-Wan thought idly as he ate the last ration bar on his spaceship. He had one small canister of water left; if he really tried to conserve it, maybe he could last a week. Is there a point in prolonging this, though? He had been stranded in space for two weeks now, drifting in the black nothingness, completely alone save for R4, who was turned off, having run out of energy after failing to power up from the out-of-order ship. His comm devices weren’t working without power, and even before that, he had trouble getting any sort of signal in the middle of the nowhere he’d found himself in.

The possibility of anyone stumbling upon him in the wild space was so close to zero that he didn’t even dare to hope. Instead, he found himself meditating most of his time away, trying to accept the death that was likely to come sooner rather than later. Sitting cross-legged on the floor, covered head to toe in emergency thermal blankets, he looked like a golden cone with a tangle of unkempt ginger hair sticking out from the top. There was no one there to judge him. When they found his frozen corpse in two thousand years, he would be well past caring.

He kept having weird dreams, probably induced by the prolonged lack of sustenance, perpetual cold and overwhelming loneliness that he had no way of overcoming. He was a social creature, always had been, so it was no wonder that two weeks without anyone closer than lightyears away he was starting to lose his mind. The dreams were surreal, too abstract to make any sense of them.

Shadowy figures haunted him—black holes in the Force, alive yet dead at the same time. He could barely make sense of it. Every living thing had a presence in the Force, even plants, let alone sentient beings. But these figures, though humanoid in shape, had less presence in the Force than the grains of sand on Tatooine. Obi-Wan found them highly unsettling. How he wished he could go to the Archives and try to find some meaning in these visions. Were they just the deluded imaginings of a dying man, or was the Force trying to tell him something? For the first time in his life, he wished the Force would just leave him alone. He found no comfort in it anymore.

His one hope was that Ahsoka, his Padawan, wouldn’t be left to fend for herself. He wished that another Jedi Master would be assigned to her, allowing her to complete her apprenticeship and achieve the rank of Jedi Knight. His unfortunate demise should not stand in the way of her path to knighthood. She would make a magnificent Knight—he could only hope the Council would see that too.

He wondered if she was searching for him alongside the 212th Clone Battalion. It was possible, but they wouldn’t even have a starting point. His mission had been a top-secret foray into the Outer Rim, known only to Masters Windu and Yoda. That was before he’d made three separate hyperspace jumps, chasing his elusive target. In the end, his ship had been hit by some kind of weapon, leaving him powerless and stranded while his target escaped into the void, with no way for Obi-Wan to contact anyone.

The weight of his circumstances pressed down on him like a heavy shroud, sapping what little energy remained. Resigned to his fate, he drew the thermal blankets tighter around his body, seeking warmth that never quite arrived. The emptiness of the surrounding space felt almost alive, as if the stars themselves were watching, indifferent to his plight. He exhaled a long, weary sigh, his breath fogging in the cold, stale air. There was nothing more to be done, no strategies left to consider, only the endless stretch of silence. With one final glance at the inert form of R4, he closed his eyes, surrendering to the darkness that seemed eager to swallow him whole.

[vodika-vibes]

continuing the love for the skiratas….Kom‘rk? Maybe he and the reader are on a mission together and due to circumstances (a storm or heavy snow) they have to wait it out for a few days and while they are waiting they realize they have a crush on each other and find an….alternative way to pass time if you know what I mean 👀

Stormy Days

Summary: After a sudden storm causes you and Kom'rk to get trapped in a cabin, you find an interesting way to pass the time.

Pairing: Kom'rk Skirata x Reader

Word Count: 886

Warnings: None

Tagging: @trixie2023 @n0vqni

A/N: I probably could have kept going with the smut, but I wasn't feeling it today, so I stopped here. If you want Kom'rk smut, you can send another ask and I'll do it properly.

“Well, this is cheerful,” You say brightly as you wring out the sleeve of your robe, “Was this storm supposed to happen?” You ask, flickering your gaze over to Kom’rk, who’s steadfastly avoiding looking at you.

“This planet is known for massive storms,” He admits, his gaze darting over to you, and then away again, “Though the next storm wasn’t meant to start for another few days.”

“Well, weather does as weather does, I suppose.” You peel off the outermost layer of your robes and wring it out, “At least we found a dry play to hang out until the storm blows over.” You cast your gaze around the clean cabin.

“It was probably built for people like us.” Kom’rk says thoughtfully, “People who got caught in a sudden storm.”

“So long as the fresher works and the bed doesn’t have bugs, I think we’ll be okay. I’ve slept in worse places…as have you.” You grin at him, and he flashes you a small smile.

“You aren’t wrong about that,” He agrees good-naturedly, “Though I’m sure you’ve been to more planets than me, little miss jedi.” Kom’rk teases.

“My master once forced me to sleep in a tree. It was awful,” You hang your robe near the door and pull your boots and then your socks off, laying them out to dry. And then you move around the small cabin, “It looks like the fresher is fully stocked.”

“Only one bed though.” Kom’rk points out, nodding towards the bed in the corner of the room, “You can have that, I’ll sleep on the couch-”

“Don’t be silly, the bed is big enough to share.” You reply as you twist your soaked hair off the back of your neck with a grimace, “I promise I don’t bite.”

He exhales sharply, as if he’s biting back a comment, and then he flashes a crooked grin, “Alright. If that’s what you want.”

You shoot him an odd look, “It just makes sense. Besides, if either of us is going to sleep on the couch, it should be me, since I’m shorter than you.”

“We already said that we’re going to share the bed,” Kom’rk replies, “So don’t worry about it. Anyway, you can go and shower if you like. I’ll see if I can get a fire started.”

You grin at him, “Thanks, I’ll do that.”

You shower quickly, and change into what dry clothes you have, a tank top and some shorts that you normally sleep in. Not ideal, but it’s all you have.

You card your fingers through your hair, and step out of the fresher into the main room, a happy sigh leaving you as you notice the fire crackling in the fireplace.

“Fresher’s yours if you want it.” You say cheerfully.

Kom’rk turns to look at you, and very nearly drops his comm, “Kriff,” He mutters under his breath as he catches it and shoves it away, “Sorry. I was giving an update.”

“It’s fine. I don’t think I’ve ever seen you fumble with anything before.”

“Yeah, well…” his gaze flickers over you, “I’ve never seen you wear so little before.”

You frown at him, “Is that a problem?” You ask.

“Only for my sanity,”

You blink at him, startled. “I beg your pardon?”

“I…no…don’t worry about it. You said the shower is open, right?”

“Yeah.”

“Great, I’ll do that then.” He smiles at you, “The bed is clean, if you want to get yourself settled, the couch isn’t terribly comfortable, really.”

“Alright, thanks.” As Kom’rk moves into the fresher, you climb into the bed, and curl up on a pillow.

He takes a startlingly quick shower, and then sits on the edge of the bed, “You know, you don’t have to share a bed with me. I don’t mind sleeping on the couch.”

You roll your eyes, and sit up. You wrap your arms around him and pull him back onto the bed, and then snuggle against his side, “Huh…you’re warm.”

Kom’rk twists slightly so that he’s laying on the bed properly, and he laughs softly, “So are you.” Slowly, hesitantly almost, one of his hands slides up your side, and settles on the side of your neck. His rough fingers trace a shape against the base of your throat, and he just stares at you.

“Kom-,” you inch closer to him, and you’re not able to finish his name as his lips are pressed against yours and his tongue is sliding against your lips.

“Kriff,” He murmurs once he breaks the kiss, his lips hovering just over yours, “Wanted to do that for ages.”

“Why didn’t you?” you ask softly.

“Didn’t want to ruin our friendship,” He replies, he rolls so that you’re pinned under him, “Still don’t want to ruin our friendship, but, fuck cyare, I only have so much self control.”

You laugh softly, “What if I want you to lose control?”

Kom’rk groans and drops his head to your shoulder to release a shuddering breath, “Fuck, cyare.”

You smile at him innocently and thread your fingers through his hair, “I’m not made of glass,” You whisper to him, “You won’t break me.”

“Oh, cyare.” Kom’rk pulls back and crashes his lips against yours, “I’m going to ruin you.” He breathes out.

You grin at him, “Promise?”

“Cyar’ika, I guarantee it.”

[khaleesiofalicante]

But, out of all the people in the room, the one who looks most surprised is David. He blinks at Max rapidly, as if Max didn’t speak French, but grew two heads instead

I was waiting for David's heart attack when Max first spoke French and he did not disappoint

We should do a collab,” Kitty grins. “People will lose their shit.”

Max doesn’t say yes or no. All he knows is that he can’t say anything without the Comms team approving it first. “Sounds good. I just need to-”

“Perhaps we should start?” David clears his throat. “We do need to catch a flight to Marseille after this.”

The jealous David in this fic is off the charts and they haven't even slept together, this is the best jealous David has a special place in my heart

“I think it really depends on the genre we’re talking about,” David shrugs. “Max quite likes 80’s rock bands. You know, Metallica, AC/DC, The Smiths and the sorts. But if we’re talking more modern singers, he quite likes Kendrick Lamar, Frank Ocean, The Weeknd. He’s quite obsessed with Doja Cat these days.”

Max blinks.

Did…Did Anjali put all of that into his fact sheet? She must have. Otherwise, how would David know all of that? Anjali must’ve done it. She is very thorough after all.

I first read this and I though Anjali didn't put all of these in the spread sheet did she? And then I read about David's obsession with Max and oh I can't wait for Max to find out about it, I just know I'll love it!

He points at David who looks like a little murderous for no reason. Maybe he doesn’t want to attend Coachella either. Good.

Did I save and cherish every bit of jealous David I could find? Yes, what of it?

Why do you look pissed?” Max demands.

“You’re the one who sounds like it,” David replies.

“Yeah, because you’re pissed at me for no reason,” Max argues. “I didn’t even do-”

“Cameras,” Uncle Jace says from behind them just as the elevator door opens.

Max smiles. David does too.

Okay that was kinda sad, how they have to put on a mask immediately. But also kinda funny

Max takes off his hoodie and throws it away. “Go on. Take a picture. Actually, take several. I need to pick the best one.”

“Um,” David blinks at him.

Pour David is out there fighting for his life and Max has no idea😂 The way Max is so oblivious here is so hilarious, I just love their interactions so much

Maybe he can help his family win the Devlins to their side.

Nooo, trauma reaction was big here.Max, babe run. Run the other way. Run fast and hard and never look back

He will never be enough, and he will always be a little wrong

Nooooo Max nooooo, David come here and make your man feel better!

Random thoughts:

Okay, Max talking about the woman Rafael is gonna end up with when he is in Coachella only to get a text from Anjali immediately after? Amazing✨️

Also, Madeleine saying she loves Sabrina and Sabrina being her daughters cast? I see you👀

And of course, David never having someone to try and do things for him and Max never having someone willing to hear his thoughts. Them giving each other what no one else gave them. I am love them🥹

This "getting to know you" chapters was my favourite and I was sooo tempted to keep writing more scenes of it lol.

Also not Max learning all kinds of things about David and David be like 'I could write a book about you' lol. My stalker king 😇

[kyomon0]

Hi ! By any chance do you happen to have a commission sheet of some kind ? 👀

I don't take commissions! they stress me out lol, but you can still just send requests in asks or dms for fandom content, or if you ask rly nicely i can also do oc content.

Just no muscular people or non-human characters lol. And it could take a while,, I have horrible time management.

,,maybe i should make comm/req sheet anyway LOL, anyway, fell free to just ask！o(^▽^)o

[innytoes]

Sleepy prompts 👀 10 for Reggie/Carrie?

Set in the Nuclear Apocalypse Bunker AU.

After Reggie got better, things with Carrie got better too. Tía Victoria kept him under observation for another week, but she visited every day, bringing him food and talking to him. When it was just the two of them, she was different. Less tightly wound.

Reggie came back to the rest of the bunker and immediately got pulled into a Molina family group hug, and then another one with Luke and Alex (his parents frowning in the background). Even Trevor gave him a part on the back, smiling. Things were kind of weird between them, seeing as how Trevor kind of saved his life but also kind of broke the rules to do so.

So things settled down again. Reggie returned to his chores, returned to cracking jokes with Willie over the comms, returned to doing whatever he could to make himself useful around the bunker. But now, he got to joke and hang out with Carrie as well. And maybe even, you know, hold hands. They were taking things slow, since they literally had all the time in what was left in the world, but it was pretty awesome.

Which was why he was the one who was pulled aside by Julie. "Hey, have you noticed something off about Carrie?" she asked. For a second, he was offended, like 'she's suddenly likes you now' was something weird and off. But now that he thought about it, she had been more and more tired lately. And snappy, but not like before, not just to him. More like she was having trouble keeping it together with everyone.

"She's been kind of tired," he agreed.

"I'm worried about her," Julie said. "And I think someone should talk to her. Someone like her boyfriend."

He flushed. "Oh we... we haven't... it's not... We haven't labeled it yet." Julie gave him a knowing look. She was like the sister he always wanted, he loved her so much. "But yeah, I'll talk to her."

So, after dinner, that's what he did. Trevor was out... schmoozing, or something. He was usually over at the Mercers or the Pattersons or even the Molinas, or holed up in the comms room talking to people in other bunkers. So he could manage to slip into their pod pretty easily without anyone noticing.

Carrie was in her room. He'd never actually been in Carrie's room yet, and he smiled at how she made the sterile place her own, just like she'd made the pretty standard uniform her own. There were sparkly stars made from food packaging stuck to the walls and ceiling, and little paper origami flowers strung up, and all the sad metal railings had been draped with fabric.

Carrie herself was hunched over her desk in a posture Reggie was very familiar with. It was the same one she used to get in math class, before he started tutoring her. Frustrated but trying not to show it.

"Hey babe," he said quietly, and she whirled around, clutching... a science book to her chest? "Whatcha doing?"

"What are you doing here?" she snapped. But Reggie knew better than to be intimidated by that now.

"Just wanted to check in with you," he said, flopping on her bed. She looked like she wanted to say something about him messing up her bedding, but he just smiled at her. "Missed you. You've been holed up in your room after dinner these past few..." Now that he thought about it, almost as long as he'd been better. "Weeks."

"I've been busy," she said.

"Doing science homework?" he asked. They did get lessons, sometimes. A lot of it was improvised, between the adults here and adults from other bunkers when they had time. Music class from The Trevor Wilson kind of was the coolest thing ever. Ray taught them Spanish, Mr and Mrs Patterson taught them all kinds of stuff about history, modern history, politics... basically what lead up to them being stuck here. Like if the understood, they weren't doomed to repeat it.

The Mercers, when they could be torn away from their Top Secret Whatever in the Bunker taught them science-y stuff like chemistry and physics, and Tía Victoria taught them biology and medicine. But this book was way beyond what Victoria was teaching them. "You aiming for an internship with the Mercers?" he asked. If anyone could talk her way into that top secret lab, it was Carrie.

"Oh very funny, Reginald," Carrie snapped, throwing the book at his head. He dodged, flinching. "We both know I'm not fucking smart enough for that." Part of him wanted to run, but then he saw the unshed tears in Carrie's eyes.

"Babe, you're plenty smart," he soothed.

"No I'm not!" Carrie shouted. "When you got sick I didn't understand a word of Victoria's explanation, and I can't do math, and I heard Mrs Mercer tell Mr Mercer that it was a good thing I was pretty and healthy, so I could be a good wife to Alex and have plenty of babies to keep civilization going, because I was never going to be a scientist." She burst into tears, and Reggie gathered her up in a hug.

"I'm just so tired," she sobbed as he stroked her back. "I don't understand it and I keep rereading the same things and I'm just so tired."

"Okay first of all, fuck what the Mercers think," he said. "They've been stuck in here for years and they still haven't realised their son is gay as fuck." Okay maybe they'd all been helping cover up Alex' conversations with Willie, but it wasn't like he was that subtle. "Also, just like, ew. To all of that." Carrie sniffled her face buried against his chest.

"And second of all, who cares if you're not gonna be a scientist? There's more to rebuilding civilization than scientists." Carrie opened her mouth, probably to say something about being a... a broodmare or whatever creepy philosophy the Mercers had. "You know how to talk to any of the adults here, like an equal. You're literally the only one who understands Mr Patterson when he forgets he's not giving a university Philosophy class, or when figuring out what Mrs Patterson means when we're dissecting what went wrong with the world and politics and stuff."

"But that stuff is easy," she said.

"Yeah, to you!" Reggie hugged her close. "Babe, you're not a future scientist. You're like, the future President. You know how to talk to people, and get them to like you, and you know how they tick." He didn't mention that when she used her powers for evil, like when she'd been mad at him, she was pretty devastating as well. He was pretty sure she knew that. "The world doesn't just need scientists. We also need leaders."

Carrie swallowed hard, rubbing at her eyes. "You mean it?"

"Of course," he said. He leaned down and nuzzled his nose against hers. "Besides, I have my hopes set on being First Husband." She laughed, before looking at him. He flushed when he realised the implications of what he just said.

"I think I can work with that," Carrie said, smiling at him. She sat up. "I should... I should make a list. Talk to Emily. See about connecting with all the other bunkers, start forming relationships with..."

"Okay, POTUS," he said, reeling her in and pulling her back onto the bed. "First, you are going to take a nap. You look exhausted, Carebear. The world, or what's left of it, will still be there for you to conquer tomorrow."

For a moment, he thought Carrie was going to argue with him. "Will you stay?" she asked instead.

"For as long as you want me too," he agreed.

[ageless-aislynn]

WIP ask game for the following: the blue lady ships it, au the war crime part out, and …or possibly like this on the condition 'heat' is something like Pon Farr and not omegaverse

boops gently

*rubs hands together gleefully* Thank you so much!

1. The blue lady ships it (Halo) aka "Untitled Cortana (and the marines) totally ship John/Kai" 😁 Sadly, this one ended up having large parts of itself "donated" to other fics and so would have to be redone if I ever decide to finish it but here's the original opening, for your reading pleasure, lol!

Cortana made sure to manifest her holographic self down at the bottom of the hill, well away from where John and Kai had just finished mopping up the last of the Covenant infantry. She'd learned the hard way that, if they felt like she was watching them, then they'd scurry away from each other.

And yet they're standing on a hill with a bunch of marines looking up at them and somehow that's not "being watched?" Maybe it's simply the distance, the false sense of privacy?

Or maybe it was because once, just once she’d appeared right next to them, practically with digital popcorn in hand, wanting a front row seat for The Big Moment?

Come on, Chief, take your helmet off. Show her those adoring eyes… she thought but was careful not to project herself into his auditory cortex. He hadn't responded well to that, either.

Kai took off her helmet.

Also acceptable. He can't resist when she's all battle-flushed. He removed his helmet as well, both of them going off comms. Not that it mattered because being literally housed in his head meant he couldn't actually shut her out; she had to choose to give him privacy. Which she was doing, thank you very much.

Watching from a distance didn't count. Ask anybody. Ask the group of marines next to her, none-too-covertly studying the Spartans and taking bets on who'd make the first move.

False sense of privacy was her favorite new thing.

2. I wasn't sure if I should make a funny scene out of a war crime 👀 Guess I'll have to AU the war crime part out, yep *nodnod* (Halo series)

Aka the completely awkward John/Makee sexytiems scene we all REALLY deserved. 😇😂 I totally, completely AU'd the war crime out of it, though, so now we can chuckle at all of the awkward, 10,000% guilt free! *nodnods* 😁👍 Still in progress, may even be completed and posted one day, who knows? Would also be my first posted John/Makee fic. 😁

3. Yeah so if Spartans went into heat, I’d probably write it like this... (Halo gameverse)...or like this (Halo gameverse, different game)...or possibly like this (Halo series) 🤷‍♀️🤷‍♀️🤷‍♀️

Technically, they're all variations on the same idea, which is why I probably won't ever write them. But they each have at least one distinct scene that lives rent free in my head, what can I say? Okay, so, with a wave of my hand, I've just given the gameverse Spartans the hormone pellets of the TV series Spartans. And with another wave of my hand and a little flourish of my fingers, I've added a condition to the pellets where, at certain times, to keep the pellets and the Spartans operating at peak efficiency, they have to go off of them.

And y'all know what I think would go on at that time. *coughcoughs in "Side Effect" NSFW* But imagine it as being more controlled than that, something scheduled, maybe a nice, out of the way place for Spartans on similar cycles to go and ahem, take care of each other, just an accepted part of being a Spartan and all that.

Annnnnnd in each of those 3 ideas, we get a pellet malfunction where game!Chief, Noble Team and TV!Chief ends up Trapped Alone With The Reader™. Not at the same time, not at the same place and not with the same Reader, I should mention. I mean, that would be one very tired Reader and quite a swingin’ Spartan party, woah, lol! 😳😂

I have a surprisingly well-defined, really more of an OC character for game!Chief, with a whole developed backstory and everything. And it's not ALL of Noble Team, just 2 of 'em. (That one actually came from a dream where the Reader was giving a report to Carter who is getting more and more flummoxed at how calm she is considering what all she's telling him. "And you're saying that you... handled them both. One at a time, right?" "Well, there might've been a one at a time in there but, honestly, it was just more expedient to double up." 😂) Then TV!Chief has a Reader no one has met before, someone who gives off this shy, reserved demeanor but who is an absolute wildcat underneath, who can give a malfunctioning-hormone-pellet Spartan a run for his money. I don’t know why but I want to see a scene where the rest of Silver Team finds them and they’re kinda running in like, “Okay, we’ve got to see if the non-enhanced human is all right. She might need medical aid!” and she’s all composed and walking out of the room like, yeah, he’s in there. And there’s John just totally worn out, asleep and snoring, lol! 😂 However, since John and Kai went through "Side Effect" together, I doubt this one would ever be written just because it's a rather close idea. I dunno. We’ll see! 😉

And *drum roll* there we have it! Thanks so much for asking! 😎👍

WIP folder ask game

[georgegraphys]

“He sounds like someone who fully knew that he is no longer the right person but is not willing to let go of the power”

Yeah Ari I have the same feeling.

I mean, I am no genius and far from being an expert, but I’ve been following f1 my whole life and I have seen something like this happen before.

Toto could let go of his TP position quite easily and be busy enough with the rest of his business work, but he doesn’t want to do it because he enjoys the power and benefits that come with it.

So he wants to remain TP for the wrong reasons (for the team), and if he really cared about bringing the team forwards, he would’ve already stepped down by now -or the board would’ve made him.

I don’t think the board is also sleeping on the team being on a back step again, right now. Big money is involved in the team’s performance discourse, so the less they bring home in a weekend, the shakier Toto’s position becomes.

Funny how Toto dodged the “do you still feel like you are the right person for this job” question. He didn’t openly say: yes of course I am!

He knows he is not, and probably the board does as well (and I hope they’ll finally act on it)

Sorry for ranting lol

TW // Christian Horner in the video ahead

If you watch the DTS S4E1, there is an interesting take made by Christian Horner (i am of no support for him but what he says here 👀)

But then i question his motivation. Money is out of the question since he'll still get $$$ from his shares even as a CEO only. But why still go for the Team Principal position? That is my biggest question.

But if I am allowed to speculate... From each generation of junior drivers, Toto seems to have his favorite or golden child. There is no doubt that from the first gen (Wehrlein/Ocon/Russell), George is his pick since he gets pretty much the whole attention. From the second gen (Vesti/Aron/Antonelli), it's even more obvious who's the favorite 🤣🤣 My guess is I think he wants to produce a world champion? George did mention Toto can't treat Lewis like he treats George because Lewis came established and is already a world champion. My guess is he wants to build someone from 0. A world champion. But at the end of the day, it's all speculative guesses from me.

He could've just wanted the position because he loved some power. Or he could've just enjoyed Formula One world and its intricate politics 🤷‍♀️ But back again anon, since Kallenius is promoted as CEO, there are always talks about the TP replacement somehow. I've searched on infos regarding other Mercedes' side of board members and no info at all about their stance (maybe i should try searching in Deutsch instead of english since they got a lot of tea 👀) but yeah it's obvious with the current result, he's on a hot seat. But one thing I admit as someone studying comms is that this man is VERY good at speaking and is very charming.

[dells-bells]

delllllllllllzzzz! any chance of a wip snippet? we're on tenterhooks for you to grace us with your lovely, brilliant content!!

🥺

babes! 🥺😭💙 this is so sweet to find in my inbox, thank you so much!

I do not have anything recently written—life kind of derailed about September-ish, in extremely good ways and some not-so-great ways too. BUT. I have ventured into the archives of my Google drive for you and found you this and I am hoping I have not shared this before

(for context, young!padawan Anakin is having trouble sleeping and comm’d Obi-Wan for help, who directed him to wake up Master):

“Whatever, Obi-Wan.” Anakin dragged himself out of bed and left his bedroom, padding across his quarters to Qui-Gon’s door. It was open as it always was, and the only sound inside was Qui-Gon softly breathing. Anakin hesitated at the doorway, reluctant to disturb him. “Do I have to?” he whispered into the comm.

“Yes.”

Obi-Wan’s voice through the comm seemed especially loud in the quiet of Qui-Gon’s room than it had in Anakin’s, and Anakin panicked and shut the link down before it could wake Qui-Gon. It was difficult to tell, but Qui-Gon’s eyes didn’t seem like they’d opened, and his breathing was still slow and even. Coming here had been a poor idea; there was no need to bother his master. Anakin turned to leave, but before he could make a single step away, he heard Qui-Gon say, “Ani.”

Anakin stopped and turned back, feeling sheepish. “Sorry, Master.”

Qui-Gon stretched his arm out towards Anakin. “Come.”

It was a hard gesture to resist. Anakin stepped forward into the room and came to sit on Qui-Gon’s bed. He attempted to try the mature thing of just sitting there, but Qui-Gon reached out and pulled him into his arms, allowing no choice in the matter. Anakin snuggled against his chest like he was ten years old again, just a small thing in need of a good cuddle. He was far too old for it now, but Qui-Gon didn’t seem to be willing to negotiate the matter.

“Trouble sleeping still?”

“Obi-Wan won’t take me for sweet ice,” Anakin explained sulkily.

Qui-Gon chuckled. “At this hour? Did you truly expect him to?”

“He should.”

“It’s too late for sweet ice.”

“You sound just like him,” Anakin complained. “It’s never too late for sweet ice, and ten is too early for bed.”

“Ten is a perfectly reasonable time for bed, especially for padawans who disobeyed their bedtimes the night before.”

Anakin pulled a face. “I’m not disobeying tonight, Master. Really. I just can’t sleep.”

“Would you like to talk about why?”

Anakin shook his head. He knew that question was coming, but he still didn’t want to answer it. “No.”

“All right. What would help?”

“Sweet—”

“Besides sweet ice,” Qui-Gon added, his tone mild and amused. “Tea?”

Anakin made the same repulsed noise as he has on the comm with Obi-Wan when he had suggested the same thing.

“You may find it helps more than you’d expected,” Qui-Gon offered. “You won’t know unless you give it a try.”

“Tea is disgusting. No thanks.”

“All right.” Qui-Gon hugged him. “Then close your eyes and rest here.”

“Master, I’ve tried. I think I’m just not meant to go to sleep this early. I should sleep in the day and be awake at night.”

“That will not be happening, little one. You need your rest, and as you have many activities and lessons and training during the day, you will have to sleep at night in order to be rested for all of your commitments.”

I am also writing a little fic for a winter exchange that I will hopefully finish! 🤞 It’s not Star Wars though (although 👀 I’m having Thoughts™️ 👀 so if we’re lucky maybe I’ll write a SW thing before Christmas🤞)

Thank you so much babes 🥺 I hope to get my life together enough to have time to write again—I miss it!

[howl-fantasies]

A/N - A glimpse of Y/N past and Jim learning a few new things here. 🤔

------------ 1 New Message --------

Jim Gordon

I found your old record. The one Oswald ordered to burn when he became mayor.

--

Y/N

What are you? A stalker? Already have one. Two in fact with Scarecrow.

--

Jim Gordon

I was just curious.

--

Y/N

Like what you saw?

--

Jim Gordon

Were you really arrested first at 10?

--

Y/N

If it's in my record I suppose, detective. I don't remember it though. What was the reason?

--

Jim Gordon

... You stole a cop car, and drove it full speed straight into another one. You killed two agents that day.

--

Y/N

Ah! I just remember the hospital, a concussion and the money I won. Should have been one hell of a show!

--

Jim Gordon

You were also arrested at 12 when you cheated in a clandestine casino in the Narrows.

--

Y/N

Oh I remember that one quite well. I was counting the cards while playing blackjack with some wanna be mafiosi. They caught me but I had the time to contact the GCPD to make them rush and close the establishment. Also called Carmine, he was faster than cops and his second in command threw me at GCPD to buy time and allow them to flee. I think I shot him in the knees a bit after that. Not sure when.

--

Jim Gordon

You shot someone at 12?!

--

Y/N

Well a few actually, even before I was 12 dude. Had to practice and start somewhere you know.

--

Jim Gordon

You were supposed to be at school!

--

Y/N

Mommy was sick and daddy a drunkard, had to bring bread on the table at a young age 🥺

--

Jim Gordon

Is it true?

--

Y/N

Well it's always the true reason in movies. Makes the villain look humain and the protagonist has some sympathy for them. Did it work?

--

Jim Gordon

... Not anymore. But now I'm curious about your parents.

--

Y/N

Ask the Waynes then.

--

Jim Gordon

The Waynes? Like in Thomas and Martha? They are dead.

--

Y/N

Precisely.

--

Jim Gordon

... Ok. No other family?

--

Y/N

Dude, you're annoying. If you wanna chat about my personal life and try to understand what happened to me to become some sicko assassin just arrest me, or do your own research or ask Harvey.

--

Jim Gordon

Harvey? He knew you when you were a child?

--

Y/N

Well since he was already a cop, yes. Ask him why the tables in interrogation rooms are sealed to the floor. Pretty sure he's still ashamed about how I table flipped it right in his face. Poor thing kept a bruise for weeks.

--

Jim Gordon

He never told me about knowing you though.

--

Y/N

He tried to bring me back to the good side so many times, a bit like you actually. It was funny to see him so frustrated.

--

Jim Gordon

Sounds more sad than funny in my opinion...

--

Y/N

Because you weren't here to see his livid then red angry face. Always made me think of a human traffic light.

--

Jim Gordon

It's also terrifying to learn you were already a sadist.

--

Y/N

You can also ask Butch.

--

Jim Gordon

What about him?

--

Y/N

We know each other for a long time.

--

Jim Gordon

Would he talk since Victor tortured him?

--

Y/N

That's what I'm curious about. Please arrest me and let me witness it I want to laugh.

--

Jim Gordon

You're insane. How could have you let Zsasz torture him when you knew him for such a long time?!

--

Y/N

It was business, nothing too personal.

...

Plus, and I am so disappointed I still have to tell you this but : it's Gotham, Jimbo. That's how it works here.

--

Jim Gordon

...

Can't belive it makes sense.

--

Y/N

You wanted to be here, now you have to play by the rules and accept them. Like French people say : à Rome fais comme les Romains.

...

Who knows maybe one day you'll have to arrest you boss or your partner. Since it's Gotham you're never too sure so don't get too attached.

--

Jim Gordon

Thanks for the advice I suppose?

--

Y/N

You're welcome.

...

Gotta go Jimbo. Take care and always be ready to be stabbed in the back 👋

--

Jim Gordon

Sure...

...

Don't do anything illegal!

--

Y/N

Sure, nothing you can ever prove, detective. Bye bye 👀

[marley-manson]

If you're still doing the ships meme: Count D/Leon (because I've been reading fic of them lately lol) and/or Fraser/Ray (because I'm curious 👀)

Thank you!! Especially for giving me an opening to talk about Fraser/Ray lol.

Send me a ship and I’ll answer three questions based on if I ship it or not.

D/Leon

Ship It

What made you ship it?

I read Pet Shop of Horrors because I knew I'd be into it, but what made me shift from 'they have a fun vibe' to 'oh they're in love in love' was D running away because he doesn't know how to love a human and Leon running after him.

What are your favorite things about the ship?

Bickering frenemies who get really attached and fall in love. Leon coparenting his kid brother with D while still regularly accusing him of every felony under the sun lol. Going on a family vacation together. The hilarious "...him?" factor of mysterious supernatural being D falling in love with Leon of all possible people. The epilogue with Chris' drawing of them as a family as the thing Leon wanted to find D to return to him ��

Is there an unpopular opinion you have on your ship?

Idk I vibe with the fic pretty well. Mmmaybe my semi unpopular opinion is that D's the one who needs to change to make a relationship possible, not Leon. I'm not really into fic concepts where Leon has to like, spend his time tracking D down bettering himself to be worthy or whatever. And I also got the vibe from the sequel (mediocre as it is lol) that part of the point is D changing and coming to like humanity more at least on an individual scale, and I dig that.

Fraser/Ray V (lmaooo okay so you didn't specify which Ray, because obviously you don't know that Ray was replaced by a character with the same fucking name, so I'm doing them both.)

Ship It

What made you ship it?

SO I'd heard about Due South because back in like 2005/6 when file sharing comms got popular on LJ there was a burst of fandom activity in a lot of old fandoms as people shared the episodes around and they got easy to get into. Due South was one of these because it was very homoerotic and had an ending that involved Fraser and Ray riding off into the sunrise together. I was like, sounds fun, I should check it out!

It was playing in reruns on tv so when I checked it out to give it a shot the first thing I ever saw was the last five minutes of the second episode of season 1. The scene was Ray V handing Fraser a wolf license, and Fraser being shocked and overjoyed. "I only mentioned it once, and you got it for me?" "Well yeah, you asked for it right?"

And I was like, okay, I'm on board, let's go.

I only realized about halfway into season one that there were two Rays and the ship everyone talked about and hyped up was a completely different ship lmao, but it was too late, I was already sold.

What are your favorite things about the ship?

I absolutely love their mildly fucked up dynamic and the show's self-awareness about it. Fraser's central character trait is his devotion to duty at the expense of himself and his personal relationships, and Ray's is his devotion to Fraser at the expense of himself, and there are multiple episodes that exist to examine it - a little imperfectly, maybe, and without full resolution, but very intriguingly.

Ray took an explosion for Fraser in the first episode and then crawled out of the hospital and flew to the NWT just to tell Fraser something he realized about his father's death. He mortages his house for him, he takes a bullet for him - twice - he carries him on his back through a forest, and nearly every time Fraser fucks him over in return, and Ray knows it, and he keeps sacrificing himself anyway.

I also think there's some deliberate classic gay subtext there, from certain lines and relationship parallels to the overarching themes. The first season is about Fraser being on a pedestal and Ray like, looking up at him in awe, and getting real, real weird about the possibility that his sister slept with him towards the end of the season, which reads as jealousy but also a sort of rejection of the idea of Fraser being touchable. And then he confronts his sister about it, and her response is to tell Ray that he's afraid to dream and reach for what he really wants. Which, I mean, come the fuck on, there's literally only one thing that could possibly apply to. And then the finale happens and that's all about Fraser falling off his pedestal and turning out to be human after all.

I also like that season 2 puts them on a bit more of an equal footing. They hash a lot of this out in the first chunk of season 2 after the season 1 finale shitshow, and Ray sees Fraser's flaws more clearly and Fraser starts to appreciate Ray more. By the end of the season they're pointedly very in sync. But their issues are never completely resolved either, which makes it like, perfect for fic imo - you can see how their relationship would develop further and how those flaws could be fully resolved with Fraser's continuing growth as a person.

Oh also I love Ray's constant constant bitching in contrast to his extreme loyalty. He will do uncountable amounts petty dumb annoying shit for Fraser and whine about it the entire time, but also if it's serious, he'll do it without ever saying a word about it. I love that Ray will bitch Fraser's ear off about having to drive him around the city during a basketball game he wants to watch, but he'll sing duets with him while carrying him around the Canadian wilderness.

Is there an unpopular opinion you have on your ship?

Hmm. Idk, I think most people who ship it have a similar take on their relationship to some extent. Well, I don't think this is unpopular (but it's maybe not the most popular interpretation), but I really like the idea of Ray's stupid intense loyalty to Fraser easily overcoming the internalized homophobia he'd have from his roman catholic upbringing and abusive father. Like flipping a switch - oh Fraser is dtf, well then no problem, not even an issue, what's a sexuality crisis after nearly dying for this guy fifty times?

Fraser/Ray K

Don’t Ship It

Why don’t you ship it?

I tried, I genuinely really did lol. I really wanted to like it so I'd be able to enjoy all the fic, and I knew I might have a loyalty issue wrt Fraser/RayV so I specifically started watching the RayK seasons while I was still going through season 2 the first time to try to combat that.

Didn't work. My problem isn't the ship, really, it's the whole show. I don't like how it changed after Paul Gross took over - even mid season 2 has some of these problems tbh, though not quite as bad. But yeah I don't like season 3/4's tone, the themes completely shifted to basically the exact opposite (let's just say Fraser returning to the Canadian north would not be a happy ending according to season 1), the scope got way too big, the magical part of magical realism got too excessive, and, frankly, the writing got kind of shitty lol. I legitimately consider Due South season 1 to be the best piece of episodic storytelling I've seen. Season 2 is mostly fine. Seasons 3+4 just get purposelessly wacky and weird.

There's one episode I legitimately thought had to be a fucking dream sequence when I first watched it because it was so nonsensical and weird, and that's about when I knew I wasn't gonna be able to get into it.

What would have made you like it?

Better writing probably lol.

Despite not shipping it, do you have anything positive to say about it?

Facilitates Ray/Ray which can be pretty good.

[ladyylesbian]

“Got one of you, Romanoff.” Tony chuckled through the comms - listen i know i shouldn’t wanna be a black widow but like….

Staring. That was the only thing you can think of to do to stay calm - accurate. i’d do the same

They’ll find you, they always do in the end no matter how many times you disable your tracker. No matter how many times you ran and hid - I TRIED TO RUN AWAY 😭😭

‘normal cuffs’ you thought to yourself as you finally looked down at your hands. Well this will be easy - my confidence

she finally moves and places stronger metal cuffs around the other pair holding my hands down to the table - ah rude

You knew right now you were screwed. There's no going back now. - no going back? that sounds like we’re gonna do something stupid

the panic in your mind began to shout at you to move to do something - well yes it’s a mysterious drug that’s about to be put in me

slight cracking could be heard - 👀 cool

“You could have just asked me to come with you, you know? No need for sedatives Natalia.” - i feel like we wouldn’t have and also using that name cannot be good

before you could even say anything everything was black - yeah sounds right

Time felt like it hadn't even passed, wait how long had passed? - ah shit

You knew exactly where on your body would cause the most damage - of course i do

it was like you had your brain back and you had no clue why or how - :( this is such a a good sad

you just knew you couldn't do any of it, this life has drained you - yeah..

That's even if you can call yourself you anymore - :/ hmph

Dropping your zipper in a panic you felt arms wrap around you. “Why the fuck would you do that y/n!” - ….i’m tired..

behind you is Natasha, she looks panicked, sad, scared, like she didn't know what to do - no no natty don’t be here

you're safe - shut up

Help, Safe, Trust. Three words you don't even remember hearing for the longest time - ouch

this universe has been harsh to you and you have had todo things at such a young age that no child should ever have had todo, it all dwelled on you. Maybe it’d be better off if the world was rid of a person like you - i want to be hugged and also give someone a hug but also i don’t wanna be touched at all

You were too scared to tell Natasha, you felt like you were reminding her of her past too much and you hated the idea of even the possibility of making her upset - yeah sounds like something i’d do. not talk to the one person who could understand and help me out of hear of causing them some negative emotion

the first time hearing you laugh genuinely - 🥺🥺 i’m feeling emotions

it didn't feel like you were constantly drowning anymore and little did she know she felt exactly the same - stop….ow. i wish more than anything to feel this one day

the same nightmares plagued your mind over and over - fun fact i rotate between the same 6 nightmares every night so i relate

“FRIDAY, can you keep me updated on y/n’s sleeping state and vitals please. Let me know if there are any signs of distress.” she called out to the AI - this is like so sweet to me

putting one of her hands on your cheek turning your head to look into her eyes. The other hand, takes one of yours and puts it over her heart holding it there tightly. “Look at me y/n/n look at me! Follow my breathing, feel my heart, follow me. - no i wanna cry. imagine someone helping you like this

That's how you felt with Natasha, safe. - accurate. she’s my comfort character

please let me sleep.” - yeah so i’m totally not doing good rn

Looking into her eyes you see them flicker to your lips but they're gone so quickly you're not even sure it was real, but you're willing to take that chance. - YES

I'll protect you, I always will. Even from the nightmares.” - i’m just gonna laugh through my pain

I knew someone who said they knew you very well.” Natashas face dropped from your statement - my yelena baby

“So you’re telling me Yelena lied?” - AHHHHHH

// the emotional rollercoaster i went through from starting to read this then my phone glitching and losing it to finding it again to feeling like i was getting punched in the gut to the softest happiness to grace me to shock. wow honestly this was AMAZING!! beautifully, beautifully written!

NONE OF THIS WAS MEANT TO HAPPEN

NATASHA ROMANOFF x BLACKWIDOW!READER

SUMMARY; You grew up in the Red Room. What happens when The Avengers manage to apprehend you on a mission when shots are fired at The Black Widow and they decide to take you in.

WARNINGS; mentions of abuse, swearing, suicide attempt, self doubt, mental health.

-PLEASE READ WITH CAUTION-

WORD COUNT; 4.4K

im sorry that this is extremely long I got carried away.

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The Avengers were out on a mission tracking down an enhanced individual that they had been tracking for months now. They were all in position, had eyes on the target just as Natasha went to intervene a bullet flew past her head just nipping her cheek and leaving a cut. Tony had eyes on the shooter, flying straight up a building to arrest said shooter.

“Got one of you, Romanoff.” Tony chuckled through the comms causing Natasha to lose eyes on the target, lucky enough Wanda had managed to throw her wisps straight towards the enhanced knocking them down in seconds. Going out to catch one, coming back with two. Maybe nearly getting shot in the head was worth it? Who knows.

Back at the compound the enhanced was put in a controlled cell and left to be dealt with by Fury. However the mystery shooter sat in an interrogation room. Behind the one way glass stood, Nat, Steve and Tony. They all stood in silence, all trying to figure out what was going on. “What did you mean by one of me?” Nats voice coming out strong and steady. Tony turned to look at Nat then back to the now noticeable young woman sitting staring back through the one way glass straight into Natashas eyes, it was as if the young woman knew Natasha was standing right there. “She has your hourglass on her belt. I thought the Red Room was gone and destroyed, Romanoff?” He turned back to Nat with a questioning look on his face. They knew where she grew up, knew the type of programme it was, they didn't know the ins and outs but they knew enough. They knew what they needed to know. “I-I don't know what to say Tony. I thought it was but I’m clearly wrong if I’m staring at another widow” Natasha stutters at first but the aggression in her tone starts to pick up, Steve deciding to definitely stay quiet clearly seeing the anger and confusion in Natashas eyes.

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Staring. That was the only thing you can think of to do to stay calm. This wasn't part of the plan, this wasn't the mission. ‘Kill The Black Widow, Natasha Romanoff at whatever cost even if you die in the process. Do you understand?’ His sickening yet scary voice sounded round in your head like it was a song you had memorised and one that you'll never forget. They’ll find you, they always do in the end no matter how many times you disable your tracker. No matter how many times you ran and hid. They still found you and the punishment that followed it was never something you could ever truly escape from, something you knew you would NEVER escape from even if you were stuck in a building with The Avengers.

Just as you finally snapped yourself out of your own thoughts she walked in staring right at you as you continued to stare through the glass. Already cursing at yourself inside for thinking about them instead of looking for a way out, already forgetting your basic training. How could you be so stupid right now. She approached the chair sitting across from you, just the table separating you. Your hands in cuffs tied to the table, ‘normal cuffs’ you thought to yourself as you finally looked down at your hands. Well this will be easy. Maybe she knew you’d have some sort of serum going through your veins, things have changed alot since she was in the Red Room, but also not by much. You go to pull your cuffs until she finally moves and places stronger metal cuffs around the other pair holding my hands down to the table, great blockers also magnetic, quite a smart move really, definitely not easy now.

“He sent you to kill me. Didn't he?” You knew she would know why you were here but why not have a little fun. “I don’t know who HE is Miss Romanoff” a smirk crawling across your face. Part of her knew you’d play this game, no widow would willingly out anybody else from the Red Room especially with the fact that SHIELD up until this point didn't think it existed anymore. “Does he control you? Messing with your head? Telling you to do things but your body and mind are pulling at different sides on what to do? Like your mind is telling you not to but your body is just going along with it?” to say that Natasha caught you off guard in that moment did not shock you at all, you knew she was going to try and feed in what she experienced and what she saw others go through. You knew right now you were screwed. There's no going back now.

Another man entered the room at this point, you and Natasha staring into eachothers eyes. Anybody would think you were having a telepathic conversation. You were the one who broke eye contact, looking at the man. Average height, brown messy hair, glasses. Dr Bruce Banner, the Hulk in other words stood right in front of the door needle in hand turning to Natasha and getting a quick nod to continue what he came to do. He started to make his way towards you, the needle in his hand coming closer, the panic in your mind began to shout at you to move to do something , to do anything. Just as he was close enough you jumped from your chair keeping in mind your hands were stuck to the table and swiftly kicked him in the chest sending him flying into the wall beside you, slight cracking could be heard. You weren't quite sure if it was his skull or the wall but who cares. Natasha made her way to Bruce picking him up and taking him outside the room, it was clear to her you weren't going to corroborate she should have known to take the needle filled with sedatives and done the job herself.

You stay stood, eyes burning holes into the door waiting for another person to come. You could see the needle in your peripheral vision, you knew you couldn't reach it, it was just out of touch. She entered again not even bothering to share a glance with you and went straight to get the sedatives, you knew she was skilled, you knew you wouldn't win against her. She wasn't known as the BEST Black Widow to ever exist for nothing, she was a traitor, but she was still the best. “You could have just asked me to come with you, you know? No need for sedatives Natalia.” The name you chose to use clearly struck a nerve because before you even knew it, you were in a headlock; needle pinching into the side of your neck, vision already going blurry and before you could even say anything everything was black.

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1 week later,

You woke up with a bounding in your head, the good thing was the cuffs were gone. Bad thing you were in a glass cell. Time felt like it hadn't even passed, wait how long had passed? Looking around quickly despite the pain pulsing through your head, trying to figure out a way to get out of this box, but nothing. No way out. Growing frustrated you threw yourself at the glass, relentlessly smacking your head and fists against the glass screaming to be let out. You didn't even know if this was still SHIELD, he could have got to you. They could have been waiting for you to wake up to begin your punishment and well that was way worse in your head. Continuing your assault on the glass blood starts to seep from your knuckles and head with the amount of force you were committing too, you didn't know what to do. Looking down at your suit that was still clingy to your bones, hourglass gone and widow bites gone but the suits zipper still there you quickly made way to ripping the zipper off leaving you with the zipper in hand, you didnt realise it would be this sharp but you knew it would do the trick. You knew exactly where on your body would cause the most damage, maybe they should have changed you out of your suit. Your head didn't feel blurry anymore; it was just as if it was when you were younger. Well from what you could remember, the buzzing in your head wasn't there anymore like it normally was, it was like you had your brain back and you had no clue why or how. Maybe this was a trick, you couldn't let them trick you. You needed out and this was a way to get that no matter where you are, in the Avengers compound or Red Room that didn't matter anymore you just knew you couldn't do any of it, this life has drained you. That's even if you can call yourself you anymore.

Holding the zipper straight to your wrist and quickly pulling harshly down blood already seeping from your new wound an alarm started sounding around your room. Dropping your zipper in a panic you felt arms wrap around you. “Why the fuck would you do that y/n!” the voice shouted from behind you. Wait, how did they know your name? Trying your hardest to wiggle out of the person's grip, you whip your head around towards that voice and there behind you is Natasha, she looks panicked, sad, scared, like she didn't know what to do. Finally getting out of her grip you move yourself as quickly as you could due to the blood still seeping from your arm over to the other side of the cell. “NO GET THE FUCK AWAY FROM ME STAY BACK! THIS ISN'T REAL! YOU’RE NOT REAL! HE IS TRYING TO TRICK ME! I KNEW HE WOULD FIND ME HE ALWAYS DOES! STAY BACK!” Your outburst worried Natasha even more, why would he trick you with her? None of this made sense, she just knew she needed to keep you calm so she could help you. “Hey Y/n no come on I’m real, I know you think I’m not but he is NOT tricking you, you're safe here. He doesn't know where you are. We got your tracker out, we got out whatever he was putting in your head, you're safe. I need you to try and trust me I'm not here to hurt you, I'm here to help, we all are, ok?”

Help, Safe, Trust. Three words you don't even remember hearing for the longest time, but part of you wanted to. She knows what they do there, she can help. You think so anyway, but if you stay here you know you don't have long until you start getting even weaker and your body starts to lose way too much blood, do you risk this?

Do you risk your inevitable death or do you reach out into her arms and be safe? Do you risk the chance of a ‘normal’ life but be constantly looking over your shoulder waiting for him to appear and take you away again. You couldnt do this, this universe has been harsh to you and you have had todo things at such a young age that no child should ever have had todo, it all dwelled on you. Maybe it’d be better off if the world was rid of a person like you. Your mind is racing at this point the dizziness starting to settle in your body from the loss of blood. Looking down to your wrist and back at Natasha, you didnt know what todo. You was stuck, you didnt want this life anymore but the fear in her eyes showed you that if she let you die, she would never forgive herself. You might not have known Natasha personal but you for sure knew someone who always looked up to her growing up and if that person knew you chose death over being safe, you dont even want to think about the way she would hate you for that. Picking up your head you finally look back at Natasha, so many different emotions could be seen through your eyes.

You hesitantly moved back when she tried to slowly make her way towards you, she saw the resistance, she reached out her hand letting you know it was safe. You eyed her for a second before reaching out to hold her hand, she felt warm. A stark contrast to how you felt, cold. She rose to her feet, you following closely behind. She sat you down on the bed and grabbed some gauze that was laying next to her pressing it to your wrist. Hissing sharply she let out a small sorry. “I-I should be the one saying sorry.” the hoarseness from your voice making her look at you concerned. “No, no honestly y/n. You weren't in control, that wasn’t you. It was him in your head.” you decided to stay quiet after that, everything still being blurry in your mind. You knew it would still be some time until it was somewhat clear again.

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You had finally been at the compound for three months now. To say it was hard to adjust to the lifestyle was unbelievable. The only people who understood were Natasha and Bucky. Natasha having cycled through the Red Room herself and Bucky having been controlled by HYDRA, they knew how you were feeling just by your facial expression.

The hardest was sleeping, not being used to the cuffs that sat harshly around your wrists secured to the headboard not being there anymore. You were too scared to tell Natasha, you felt like you were reminding her of her past too much and you hated the idea of even the possibility of making her upset. She was surprised but understanding when you finally opened up to her one night 2 months ago.

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You couldn't sleep so you had made your way down to the training room to hopefully tire you out so you could finally sleep. Stepping foot into the training room turning the corner you were met with Natasha throwing punches at the punching bag, a light sweat rolling down her head, dressed in pyjamas and not training clothes. “Bad dream?” your voice sounded so loud in the silence of the room, it startled her causing her to quickly turn around tense shoulders visible, you made your way over take hold of the back of the punching bag giving her the indication she can carry on punching. She didn't reply to you, so you decided to take a leap of faith and go with your gut.

“I get them too, you know? Well obviously you know that, it would be weird if I didn't right? Poor depressed girl taken as a toddler trained to become a ruthless assassin, growing up under cruel punishment and killing more people by the time I was 11 than I have ever had hot dinners. Would be weird if these things didn’t haunt me but they do.” she stopped punching as you slowly quietened down realising what you had just spilled, she looked at you with an understanding gaze, you hadn't been so open yet and she never wanted to push to get you to open up. She wanted you to willingly do it yourself and you finally did and she understood every word you had said. “Yeah you're right it would be sooo weird.” is what she decided to voice back smirking at you, a chuckle escaped your lips. “Come on y/n/n lets go to my room and watch a movie, might help us forget about our perfect childhood aye.” you laughed at her because of that, the first time hearing you laugh genuinely. She couldn't help but smile back and put her arm around your shoulders to lead you to her room. After that movie nights became a must in both of your schedules, and for each movie you both opened up more and more. It felt nice like so much was being lifted off of both of your shoulders, it didn't feel like you were constantly drowning anymore and little did she know she felt exactly the same.

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The bad nights of trying to sleep still continued and when you finally managed to fall to sleep the same nightmares plagued your mind over and over until you woke up in a sweat gasping for air. You hated it. It felt like it was the only thing you weren't able to control and you felt so powerless. The constant getting out of bed and having to sneak past Natashas room to either go down to the training room or down to the living area, worrying in case you woke her up knowing she was struggling too. You knew that Natasha knew you were not sleeping well, it was obvious. The dark bags under your eyes worsened every day you went without sleep, training during the day started to feel like a mission itself, barely being able to dodge the punches and kicks coming at you, giving up on simple tasks because they took too much effort to complete. Sleep was the thing ruining you, not the trauma or the flashbacks, it was just the fact you weren't sleeping.

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After spending most of the morning in the training room you finally decided to make your way back to the kitchen and get a snack, then maybe go back up to your room and try to nap. You needed too, you felt so drained. Walking into the kitchen, the familiar light laughs of everyone filled your ears, it brung a small smile that danced across your lips as you walked into the room and over towards the fridge. “How was training?” it was always Natasha, well not always but mostly. “It was good, feeling a little tired just gonna grab an apple and water and lay down for a bit. I'll come see you when I wake up, ok?” grabbing what you needed and watching for Natasha to send you a quick nod you made your way back up to your room. Already have eaten your apple and thrown the core in the bin, you couldn't even find the effort to shower and change just getting straight under your covers and closing your eyes hoping to fall into a peaceful sleep for once.

Natasha was happy you were willingly going to try and have some sleep. It gave her some peace knowing you were tired in hopes of it taking over you and just letting you forget everything even if it's just for an hour. “FRIDAY, can you keep me updated on y/n’s sleeping state and vitals please. Let me know if there are any signs of distress.” she called out to the AI also still worrying but knowing she has to try and do something about it now. “Yes Miss Romanoff.”

Heading down to the training room herself with Steve to spar, she couldn't help but worry that you weren't ok. “Nat she is ok, she is just sleeping. You'll know if something is wrong FRIDAY will notify you ok. Let's not get distracted.” Steve knew to keep it sweet and simple. Simply just wanting to get in a quick sparring session and then continue on with his day. Stepping onto the mats and starting to spar, Natasha let her mind drift away from you and to the task on hand making sure to get Steve down.

Just as Natasha was putting Steve on his arse for the 5th time in 20 minutes, FRIDAYs voice came blasting through the speakers of the training room. “ Miss Romanoff, Y/n is showing severe signs of distress in her sleep, heart rate is 205bpm. Breathing is erratic. It seems as though she can't wake up.” as soon as FRIDAY stopped talking Natasha sprinted to your room in a hurry not caring about the people she ran into on the way to your room. She burst through the doors and the sight made her choke. Tossing and turning in the bed barely breathing, it looked as if you were trying to fight somebody off of you, Natasha sped over quickly shaking you trying to wake you up. “Y/n I need you to wake up, it isn't real. Whatever you're dreaming about isn't real. WAKE UP” her voice becoming more panicked and louder the longer she spoke, the last time she saw you like this was when you had finally woken up a week after they sedated it, it broke her break.

You finally sat up in a hurry getting straight off the bed holding and clawing at your chest, struggling to catch your breath. It felt as if someone was strangling you and they wouldn't let go, you turned to Nat. Panic radiating your face, she sprung into action coming over to you putting one of her hands on your cheek turning your head to look into her eyes. The other hand, takes one of yours and puts it over her heart holding it there tightly. “Look at me y/n/n look at me! Follow my breathing, feel my heart, follow me. In and out slowly...yeah that's it you've got it. Calm breaths. I'm here. I'm not going anywhere.” the panic starts to settle in your chest, the hand that felt like it was around your throat loosening and finally letting go. Looking intently into Natashas eyes you fall into her arms sobbing. She takes this motion and slowly lowers you and her to the floor, she holds you safely in her arms. That's how you felt with Natasha, safe. Like no one and nothing can or will ever hurt you, like she is your guardian angel. Your sobbing continues and all Natasha does is softly shush you while stroking your hair and kissing the back of your head. “It-it-it was like he was there, he is always there holding me down and no matter what I'm not strong enough to get him off me he won't budge. Just one minute he is on top of me hands around my throat then he has me pushed against the wall whispering in my ear how he will have control and I wont keep running away and then it's back to his hand around my throat Nat. He wont let me sleep, please let me sleep.”

The sobbs continue into even more tears losing control of your breathing all over again, Nat continues her praises of following her breathing while this time picking you up and placing you in between her legs on your bed. Your head resting on her chest as she strokes your hair telling you over and over that it isn't real, that he isn't going to get you anymore. Your crying finally comes to a stop, the last few tears rolling down your cheeks onto Nat's chest. The feeling of being exhausted rolling over your body, you feel so weak the only thing keeping you grounded is Natasha who you are laying on top of, still continuing stroking your hair. You go to move to look at her and you can't help but to look at her the smallest bit differently. Love. The one person who finally cared about you and proved to you that she will keep you safe. Looking into her eyes you see them flicker to your lips but they're gone so quickly you're not even sure it was real, but you're willing to take that chance. You lean into her slowly preparing for rejection and when you finally reach her lips you're surprised when they softly kiss you back. Moving your hands to wrap around your neck and moving to straddle her, you hear the smallest of a moan in your mouth. The kiss continues to be soft and it's everything you could have ever wished for, gentle and sincere. You both finally pull away when air becomes an issue, still staring into eachothers eyes you lean your forehead softly against hers moving your hands slowly to lay at the top of her chest, feeling her heart beating beneath your fingertips. Nothing can describe this feeling. You slowly shuffle yourself down laying your head on her chest as your final position, it's comfy. You enjoy being in her arms. “He isn't going to get you anymore y/n. Not when you have me. I'll protect you, I always will. Even from the nightmares.” you send her a soft hum letting her know you were still listening even though your eyes were closed leaving yous in a comfortable silence.

“You know Tasha.” you finally broke the silence, your voice coming through so soft and gentle as you try the new nickname out for the first time. Looking up at Natasha you see the smile on her face, finally convincing yourself she likes the nickname you continue. “I always saw you there when I was growing up, being younger and being in different stages of the programme, I didnt know you but I knew someone who said they knew you very well.” Natashas face dropped from your statement. You felt her tense underneath you which lead you to move slowly from her arms, apologies falling from your mouth with your moments. Staring at her as she didnt move to meet you eye, you hated yourself all over again for bring up her past in the Red Room. You slowly grew quiet not knowing whether to continue or to leave the room and give her space, you continued to eye her carefully until she finally looked at you. “Hey no Y/N/N its ok, you just took me by surprise. I didn’t know anyone there. People made friendships and that only caused pain and we couldnt feel that. I couldn’t feel that. I stayed alone you must have seen that if you saw me. I carried myself. Everyone there would have stabbed us in the back you know that.” her whole settlement threw you off, you looked at her sadly but still with an element of shock. You knew your friend knew her she had proof. Your reply caught her by shock again she didnt expect these words to come out of your mouth.

“So you’re telling me Yelena lied?”