#maybe i should make my friends write bad reviews so it gets fixed

[sheyri]

It's kinda funny how customers straight up don't listen to what I say.

And by funny I mean really fucking annoying.

So, I'm checking out customers, they want to pay by card and the thingy wants the PIN. Now, the device at my register is a little broken, it just takes some numbers twice sometimes, no matter how careful you are.

I tell the customer as much, them, yeah, k. Enter their PIN. It's wrong. Them, what? how? I know I entered the correct PIN!

My guy, I believe you, it's not your fault! But if you'd listened to me, you would've known to double-check every number you enter and that it's the right number of dots before you confirm! And if it's not, you correct and try again!

But of course paying attention to a lowly cashier is beneath you, so here you are, having to enter your PIN again. And if you fail two more times your card is locked.

Best example from today was this dude who acknowledge that I had said something, entered his PIN wrong, I told him again that it takes numbers twice, explain what that means even, it's wrong again. I say, our device is faulty. "How was I supposed to know that?"

BECAUSE I FUCKING TOLD YOU! TWICE!

(And yes, I said that to him. Minus the shouting and swearing, of course.)

Of course we don't just get a new card reader. That costs money, you know. Something a retail chain that makes thousands of euros each day and pays minimum wage just doesn't have.

[adoringsuga]

— ruin our friendship.

⭑ featuring. chigiri hyoma

⭑ content. fem!reader, chigiri gets jelly lol, kissing that gets a little heated so be warned, several isagi mentions (& cameo!) bc i love him, & cursing

⭑ word count. 2.3k

⭑ summary. chigiri hyoma, plain and simple, is your best friend in the whole wide world. your relationship is as uncomplicated as can be; yet, after you ask a presumably innocent question about a friend of his, something comes to light that changes everything...

⭑ notes. omg this is like my first post ever so…hello (≧∀≦)!! this is also like?!??! my first fanfic ever so... lollll... it's honestly so short so i didn't even know what to even write for the summary... anywho! hope u enjoy!! hopefully there will be more to come b/c super obsessed w blue lock rn ngl

“Your hair is so soft,” you murmur mostly to yourself, fingers combing through soft, cherry-red strands, gently untangling any knots you come across with a care reserved solely for the boy currently resting his head in your lap.

Hyoma only hums appreciatively, hyper-focused on the TV in front of you two, sporadically tapping his fingers on your thigh when something of note occurs on the screen. He had turned on some old football game of his when he had invaded your apartment—unannounced, you may add,—around an hour ago. And, before you could utter a single word of complaint about his choice of entertainment, he quickly began haughtily sprouting some bullshit about having to study his old match so he could be aware of what to improve on to better his techniques and what a shame it would be if his team were to lose because someone was to interfere with his review.

Personally, you think he only said that so you wouldn’t change it to this new movie—or, ‘the overly sweet and annoying chick flick’ as Chigiri has lovingly dubbed it—you’ve been dying to watch for weeks now.

Asshole Hyoma, you think a little bitterly, It’s your apartment, you should be able to choose what you can watch or not.

(But, as your eyes flicker to the intense concentration alit on his face, the way he scrutinizes every move, every pass, every shot with an acute focus you find weirdly endearing [and oddly attractive, to your growing horror], you can’t help but think maybe this is fine for now. Maybe.

Maybe football isn’t too bad, you muse, actively ignoring the infinitesimal flush that rises to your cheeks.)

Bored of simply threading your fingers through his strands, you begin to separate his hair into chunks, intertwining the strands once you’ve deemed you’ve parted the hair neatly enough for a loose braid.

You’ve always thought that Hyoma’s hair was inexplicably beautiful, much like the rest of him. Delicate features combined with a lithe yet toned body made him increasingly popular with the female and male demographic of soccer fans (and non-fans as well), especially as his popularity grew and grew with each match he was featured in.

You, simply, admired his beauty for what it was: graceful and elegant, never perceiving him in the lustful light most fans of his had taken to since his debut, (although you would be lying if you said a part of hadn’t slowly begun to see him in a light less than platonic since the start of the year or so).

(These feelings, truthfully, make you want to crawl into a hole and die).

Shaken from your train of thought when a loud cheer erupts from the speakers, your eyes flit up at the TV briefly, blinking in surprise when someone of note catches your eye. You can’t help but gape, fingers stilling from your steadfast braiding as you let out a low whistle, gaze fixed upon the TV.

Even though it makes your heart pang painfully in your chest, you know Hyoma will never see you the way you see him, so, you might as well try and get over him now.

And, without a doubt, you think that the forward on your TV can definitely help with that.

“Whoa,” you mutter, in genuine awe at the gorgeous boy on screen. “Hey, hey, Chigirin,” your words are coupled with a few pokes to his cheek, and he turns his head slightly to look up at you once you’ve finished your ministrations, letting out an inquisitive hum with a raised eyebrow.

“Who’s that?” you question as soon as he peers up at you, pointing at the midnight-haired boy with glimmering deep blue eyes on the TV, eyes gleaming with interest.

“… Why.” Is all he simply says once he sees who it is, voice carefully level and gaze clouded with something you can’t quite place.

“Because he’s cute,” you answer, immediate and truthful, with an almost ariose cadence to your words. You pause for a moment, intently studying the midnight-haired boy, who, at the moment, is currently celebrating a vivacious goal when it all suddenly clicks. “Hey, wait, isn’t that Isagi-san? And aren’t you playing his team next week? Do you think you can get me his number?”

(Embarrassingly, a part you blindly hopes that Hyoma will say say no, so you can overanalyze the meaning behind such an act and further fuel your delusions that Hyoma was definitely into you just as you were to him.

And, hey, who can blame you? Getting over a guy like Hyoma is an agonizing endeavor, so sue you for trying to enjoy your delusions for a bit more before it all comes crashing down and you’re once again stuck in the role of his supportive best friend.

Forced to be something you wished you weren’t. His best friend. Only his best friend.)

Hyoma abruptly sits up from your lap, and you let out a little yelp at the suddenness of it, eyebrows furrowed. His curtain of hair hides his face from your puzzled gaze, and you tilt your head a millimeter to the right, curious.

(The strands of hair you had been braiding loosen at the movement, and eventually unravel unceremoniously after a second passes.

You’re slightly dismayed at the fact.)

Suddenly, a chill runs down your spine, and, for some inane reason, you feel as though you’ve fucked up.

“U-uhm, Chigirin,” you begin awkwardly, suddenly frantic to fill the uneasy, growing hush because truthfully, Hyoma’s unexplainable silence is really starting to weird you out. You’re about to sprout some bullshit about something your statistics professor said the other day, when, all of sudden, you’re on your back, the air knocked out of your lungs and mouth agape in shock.

Pink eyes simply stare down at you, unblinking and almost bored.

“H-Hyoma…?” you manage to stutter out after a long moment, face impossibly red as the boy in question leans over you, the heat of his breath ghosting over your lips. You lay limp, hyper-aware of the fact that even if you did want to move, you wouldn’t be able to as your wrists are being held securely in place by one of Hyoma’s hands. You vaguely wonder if it’s bad that this mere fact gives you butterflies.

(You never use his given name, and Hyoma feels a sick sense of satisfaction curl in his belly at the melodic chime of it.)

You’re warm all over, yet Hyoma seems entirely unphased; even though if he were to only move a mere inch or two, your lips would surely touch.

The thought causes something to thrum in your stomach, makes it tighten in apt anticipation and your breath catch in your throat. I can’t do this, you think, nearly hysteric. It’s all too much, and you turn your face to the side, unable to meet his piercing gaze any longer lest you confess to something you know you’ll regret immediately. Though, with the movement, your gaze somehow catches the TV once more, and there, in all his spectacular glory, is Isagi Yoichi, grinning handsomely with navy blue eyes burning with unabashed determination, calculating and undeniably resolute.

His focused gaze is locked right onto the camera, and his eyes bore intensely into yours as if you’re right there in front of him, as if he could plainly reach out and touch you.

(Oh goodness. Your delusions are growing worse and worse by the day.)

Hyoma growls, seemingly aware of what has currently captured your attention, and purses his lips as though he has just eaten something rotten.

“Don’t look at him.” He demands suddenly, using his thumb and forefinger to gently yet firmly hold your chin, tilting it in a way that ensures your gaze is set on him and only him. “Don’t look at Isagi. Don’t look at anyone else. Look at me.”

“I… what? Hyoma… What do you… ?”

“Can’t you see?” he snaps, almost furious. “I’m in love with you. I have been since I met you. I was fine not saying anything before, but I refuse to lose you to Isagi too.”

Your heart stops. Everything simply stops. Have you been in an accident? And is this simply your unconscious mind attempting to soothe you with what you’ve always dreamed of most? But it can’t be, because you can feel the searing warmth that permeates from his skin, can count every eyelash and every light, scattered freckle, can smell the addicting cologne you mentioned liking to him offhandedly months ago because a guy in your class was wearing it, and so many other things that disproves your accident theory fully.

This is real. This is happening.

Chigiri Hyoma is in love with you?

“You’re in love with me?” you echo in disbelief and rose buds bloom on the crests of Hyoma’s cheeks as he nods adamantly, the hand grasping your chin drifting up to cup your cheek instead.

Somehow, it’s that second, silent confirmation that truly affirms it for you.

Chigiri Hyoma, the perpetual thorn in your side and your best friend in the whole wide world, is in love with you.

Your heart leaps, before it swells. Chigiri Hyoma is in love with you, and he says it as though it is an undeniable fact.

Chigiri Hyoma is in love with you. He’s in love with you.

You feel dizzy at the news, everything fuzzy and muddled except for Hyoma himself, who looks to be growing increasingly nervous and tense with each passing second of silence from yourself.

I should probably say something, you think in a haze.

But, you can’t think of anything that could adequately describe the emotions you’re feeling at the moment, so you simply lift your head and softly graze your lips with his, taking in shocked, pink eyes before crashing your lips together fully. Hyoma makes a small noise of surprise, before melting into it, letting go of your wrists and instead taking your face tenderly with calloused hands, rough against petal-soft skin.

He’s practically on top of you now, but you can’t find it in yourself to care- using your newly freed hands to run your fingers through his hair, to grasp at his face, his waist, and anywhere else you can reach.

It’s not the best kiss, per se- your teeth knock together more than once in a way that causes a dull ache, and mortifying sounds keep escaping your mouth at the most inopportune moments, but God, you don’t think you’ll ever get a kiss like this again.

Regrettably, you pull away after a few more glorious moments, Hyoma chasing after your lips before settling to simply press chaste kisses at the corners of your mouth instead. He trails down after a moment, beginning to nip lightly at the soft skin of your neck, insistent yet gentle as his teeth graze your pulse ever so slightly. You whine at the feeling, almost panting as you weakly push his head away as warmth blossoms under your ribs, settling in your stomach and wisping through your limbs in a hum.

He nips once, twice, before lifting his head, albeit begrudgingly, finally allowing you the chance to suck in a breath of sweet oxygen through parted lips.

As you catch your breath, you hazily gaze up at a red-faced Hyoma, his lips rosy and swollen from pressure and eyes blown and glassy. Embarrassingly, the sight causes your chest to clench with something akin to desire, and you nibble at your kiss-bitten lips in an attempt to keep those feelings at bay, if for the time being.

A beat passes.

“I love you too,” you admit airly as soon as the heat in your cheeks and the rapid beating of your heart calms down to a somewhat manageable level, and Hyoma simply laughs, eyes glimmering with adoration.

“I think I garnered that,” he grins, before capturing your lips once more, cradling your face as though you’re the most important thing to him in the entire world.

(“Hey. Isagi.” Yoichi turns at the call of his name, perking up slightly at the sight of familiar cherry-red hair tied loosely in a bun and long lashes. Putting down the small trinket he had been toying with, he opens his mouth, eager to greet Chigiri back when the other is suddenly right in front of him. Yoichi blinks, grinning openly before Chigiri abruptly takes and wrenches a large chunk of his hair harshly between thin fingers.

“Ow!” he hisses immediately, scalp throbbing hotly and already aching like a motherfucker. He’s surely going to have a headache later, and that realization, alongside the whole, you know, hair-yanking thing, puts a damper on his mood. “What was that for?” he exclaims, incredulous, angrily rubbing at the spot Chigiri had pulled with an ire Yoichi prays he’ll never experience again.

“For my girlfriend,” Chigiri states matter-of-factly, patting Yoichi on the head lightly and demeaningly as though he didn’t just violently violate his poor scalp. He gives no time for the older to respond, already swiftly turning from Yoichi and beginning to walk away, but not before brazenly declaring, “Oh. And we’re beating you too, so be ready for that.”

“Girlfriend? What the hell did I do to your girlfriend?” Yoichi sputters, blatantly ignoring Chigiri’s last statement and decidedly shelving it for a later discussion because what the fuck? What did he do to deserve to have his hair pulled again?

[What is with him and getting his hair pulled, genuinely? Do people just see him and instantly think, ‘Oh yes, he looks like he likes to get his hair pulled’?

For the record, he does not. He really does not, from the bottom of his heart.]

Chigiri simply laughs, the honeyed glow of the sun catching in his hair and making it burn a fiery red, and Isagi can only watch the other boy strolls away, left cluelessly standing with a stinging scalp and widened eyes.

“... Wait. Chigiri-san has a girlfriend?”)

[amechans-funny-tictacs]

🩷 AMALGAMATION by @/jiraiema (emalynski on Spotify/Bandcamp) album review!!!

I'll be listening to her music and write a honest review right after each song.

I hope this brings more attention to her album and be an entertaining post!

So, let's go!! Review under the cut :D

💥 LANDMINE

It gave me FEELS. It's sad, but energetic. The instruments and her voice sound really fucking good. It's still playing in my head as I write this and fix the intro part.

☆•°•☆

⏰ TIME WITH YOU

owowowiewoowieowie 😭😭😭😭😭😭

So, this song IS good. Good instrumentals and vocals again, and absolute feels. Though, at first it didn't quite "click" with me - nothing wrong, I just didn't fall in love with it. But as I'm writing this I'm replaying the part... "I don't care if you're sick, I don't care if you're poison". So I think this song may grow into me.

I have one honest criticism though. The vocals were, in my opinion, too quiet. Not her singing, but the mixing. The instruments drown it out too much.

It's nice, right now I'm not too into it but it might change :)

☆•°•☆

♟ TABLETOP

😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭 My heart

I found the beginning kinda funny, not in a bad way! Again this song is sad, but not because of a bad situation, rather it's about anxiety, fear of abandonment etc. in a relationship. I found myself smiling and singing- well, lipsync-ing along! It's making me think of a person and

Must I comment again on the production? It's consistently high quality! And I didn't find the vocals too quiet this time. I LOVED THE XYLOPHONE TOO (was it a xylophone? The cute sound)

Now please don't explode me with more feelings on the next one (I know she will)

☆•°•☆

😼 ASPIRING CAT

FUCK YEEEEEEEEAAAAAH A DARKER SOUNDING SONG 🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥 I REALLY LOVED THIS ONE MUSIC AND LYRIC WISE!!!! I WANNA BE A CAT GOING MAOW MAOW MAOW I WANNA BE A CAT GOINF MAOW MAOW MAOW SO REAL...

I have 1 criticism as well though. It's something I kinda noticed in the songs but this one stuck out to me. Ema, you should show more confidence and emotion in your singing! :3 I understand if you're anxious recording these but take this as a sign that you'll only benefit from going all in with emotion.

(As I'm re-reading this before posting, I realized that softer vocals might be a thing about the genre idk, feel free to ignore this suggestion, but I still think you deserve to feel confident and proud of your work.)

You should totally do more training to get more confident!! Because the talent, the technical aspects, are all ACED. You deserve to be proud and confident in your music and abilities because they're truly bangers. I see your potential is oozing just from these few songs I listened to. I just wish your singing showed more raw emotions like you're really feeling the lyrics. Which, I know you feel them, that's why I want it to reflect on your performance! The instruments show a lot of emotion already, and I'd like you to sing in uppercase when you see fit, because it's like everything is in lowercase right now. XD

☆•°•☆

I'd really love it if you remade or just "updated" this song in the future with more aggressive/louder singing. No pressure though! Only if you want to!! 💖 maybe you could take inspiration from Dead but Pretty by IC3PEAK, Aspiring Cat kinda reminds me of that song, and I really admire the singer's emotional range.

Well, I legit REALLY LOVED IT!!! The instruments were pure eargasm and I relate to the lyrics!!

☆•°•☆

👭 BEST FRIEND

This one was a happier one, except for the part about getting killed /j lol hey, I noticed more emotional range in the singing! Again with banger melody. And some parts of the singing like in the beginning are louder, but unfortunately some parts again sound like the instruments are "on top of" the voice and not vice versa.

☆•°•☆

🔪 BOX CUTTER

It was a good energetic song, but it just didn't click with me! </3 I REALLY fuck with the instrumental part at 02:00 though. 🔥

I don't think there's anything to improve, I simply didn't vibe. If I gave any "tips" here they'd essentially be me telling Emalyn how to change her style to better cater to me, and that just ain't it. The song had a specific mood and message, which it accomplished. And that's all that matters!

☆•°•☆

💊 LISDEXAMFETAMINE

Ok, I was hyped for this one bc of the title (I heart drugs) lol

So, sometimes I couldn't understand the lyrics because Emalyn's voice would be drowned out by the instruments, but that didn't happen in this song. Yippeee

I'm starting to realize maybe this specific genre isn't for me. But, I'm sure people who are into softer rock will LOVE the album.

Pump it up

Into me

Lisdexamfetamine :3

IT FLOWS SO WELL

☆•°•☆

1️⃣7️⃣ SEVENTEEN

I'm going to cry it wasn't even that sad theorically but it makes me think of something

Might keep replaying to make myself cry bc I haven't cried in a long ass time

☆•°•☆

🐈 SAM

I wish I could enjoy this song more but I got emotionally destroyed from the last one 😭 I believe Sam is the goodest boy though I have 2 cats myself and, one doesn't care about me but the other is my bestest friend forever and I love him so much

Score: 69/10 based

☆•°•☆

🙏 THANK YOU

Owieowieowiepwiwwoiowiewowioeowie

Feels

And her voice is so attractive

Like

This song and I think Lisdexamfetamine really highlighted the attractiveness for some reason

I'm not complaining :3

Might keep repeating only for the attractive voice <3

🩷 FINAL THOUGHTS

I'm still not over 17 I WILL repeat that song until I cry, Ema if you're reading this it's ok, I need it XD

Overall, this genre isn't for me, but on a technical level it's such a solid album. I have very few negative criticisms. I hope Ema makes more music and becomes popular!!!

[lovelystarg1rll]

Horikoshi is a professional mind fucker, he could be a virgin yet the way he writes fucks with the mind, I'M A VICTIM.

Endeavor s1, 2,3,4 = Referred to as a complete ASSHOLE, pushed his beliefs on his son (Horikoshi sucked his cock enough to make him nicer in the backstories) every piece of information we are given about this man in these seasons are that he's a dick, he fucked up his only family and then switched up once he became number one, or when he knew he'd be number one, it's honestly fuckin sad, and then in seasons 5,6,7 we see this always gentle, good helping guy, "çharacter development—" SHUT UP, WHAT SHOTO HAS IS DEVELOPMENT EVEN IF IT'S FUCKING SPEEDED ALONG.

Rei = She agreed and was sold off but when you're raised to be a of use to your family or to save your family and you don't really care, Rei has spoken up, she's tried, but she never has a position of power, she can't speak like she should but only could when Enji was in a hospital bed, she was in a mental hospital from the time she scarred Shoto to when he was in highschool, I'm sorry for to be there that long is horrendous and to be put in the same placement as the man that would hit you when you defended your children and hit those children and hit YOU in front of those children, baby I'd go insane too, "Oh but when she married Endeavor she knew-" If she knew she wouldn't defend her children, and she expected them to be raised into heroes but by beating them around the age of five and six was not in the review.

Bakugou = This is where the tomatoes come, and it's completely normal to like him even if I don't, he's a dick, all three seasons he's a dick, he simmers down because all mights retirement humbled him, it's not bad to give a downright dick a bad arc so you can put him through hell and fix him, that's not bad, but admit he was a bully, admit he's downright disrespectful a majority of times, the way he only gets nice to Midoriya is when they drag his ass to U. A, I hate hearing his inner dialogue about Midoriyas situation, if being a bitch until you need to be nice is character development then I'm not for it, and I don't mind when characters who are dicks get kindness but we have him dragging Midoriya and suddenly it's them against the world.

Shoto, poor Shoto, see he's very solid then he breaks apart, like ice that melts when hell is on him, no Im alluding to his parents And his connection with them, Shoto despite having a grudge is right through and through, his father drove his mom insane and then she was in a mental hospital, his rebelling is not wrong, it could be seen as him trying to oppose the abuser yet makes him slightly feel that he has to stop using fire for a bit until his mom is like it's all fine and you do you babes, he's always been a snark to Bakugou so it's really stupid to make him the resident punching bag, "Oh but Shoto sees Bakugou as a friend—" THAT'S FINE HOWEVER THIS TAKES AWAY HIS CHARACTERIZATION OF SEASONS 1,2,3 AND MAYBE 4, Bakugou being high and mighty only for Shoto be like fuck out of my way.

Hawks = I almost tricked my mind, he looks good but he's murdered twice and I'm saying that I don't give a FUCK about what Twice could have done, shit, I just don't like the fact they became friends and he just betrayed Twice, it's like if time came and you both are friends and he's hired to kill you for some reason, mf will kill you, he's tainted by the hero commission and it's sad, because his dreams were the advantage, he realizes that over time, he didn't kill just anyone that was a friend and that is backstabbing and then instead of him still seeing what he did as the right thing, just let him have conflict like a normal person unless we're revealed that he's a sociopath, I don't hate him but the anti tag makes me feel comfortable.

[danaedanette]

Final review of ACOTAR

Sooooo. I finished ACOTAR. Disclaimer, the pages referred here are from the French translation.

It's a massive review, (9k caracters and 3 hours, I really didn't think I would write something this long) so I put it under this "read more" thing.

I already mentioned in another post the book is really slow paced during, like, 70%, because it’s focused on Feyre and Tamlin relationship and budding romance. It’s not necessary a bad thing, but it get a little boring after a while. But I already read the book once ; I knew what was going to happen, and it certainly played a part in my boredom (is it the right word ??) so I’ll be indulgent about the pacing.

I picked up one little inconsistency toward the end of the book : on page 452, Tarquin is described as having “almost white hair, striking cristal blue eyes and warm ebony skin” (an rough translation back to English by myself lmao). And later on page 508, he is described having “tanned skin, a blue and green tunic, a roses crown on his blond hair” (still a rough translation). Honestly, it isn’t too bad, Tarquin isn’t an important character yet (or at all), he isn’t even named, only called “Summer High Lord”. I picked it up because Tarquin is more present in the following books and I frowned on the description page 508, and I remembered that he made another short appearance sooner in the book so I checked it up.

So onto the characters and what I thought about them !

Let’s begin with Rhysand, at least it’ll be done faster. No surprise here, I didn’t like him. I’ll admit all the seeds for Feysand are planted here so it's smoother on the next book, something I hadn’t saw on my first reading 7 years ago. But alas, Rhysand is desesperatly Rhysand, so all the signs of abuse that will (in my opinion) define the character and the Feysand relationship are all here too. Nothing new : the forced deal with the broken arms, the drugging and dancing, the eye that spy on Feyre,… I know it’s all explained (and immediately brushed under the carpet) in the next book, even if I don’t remember the details, and obviously Feyre forgives him, but I simply can’t condone Feysand with a history that heavy between them. Especially as we know that there will be… questionable actions on Rhysand’s part later on. Either he doesn’t learn of his past mistakes or they’re not mistakes at all and he knows perfectly well what he’s doing. I think (to no one surprise) that the latter is true, and here an example why : the first time Feyre is painted in preparation for her nightly dances, Rhysand shows her how, when the paint is damaged by contact, he can fix it with his magic. And later on, when Tamlin and Feyre are kissing and Rhys interrupts them, Tamlin has paint on himself and Rhysand made it disappear. Or maybe Tamlin does it himself, but either way it doesn’t matter, my point still stand : Rhysand can fix the paint on Feyre, he doesn’t have to kiss her to explain that the paint is blurred when Amarantha comes in the room. So Rhysand lied to kiss (read : sexually abuse) Feyre. He’s a dick. (Or it’s another inconsistency on Maas part, who knows ?)

Still, I liked him better in this book that I will in the next, because here we don’t have the narrative and Feyre telling him that he’s a poor, poor baby who never, ever did anything wrong in his life (or else he was forced and he didn’t want to do it :( ). Here, he’s still a villain/really morally grey character. (I keep making assumptions about what I’m gonna find in ACOMAF, and I should stop because I want to go in with an open mind.)

Amarantha is caricatural. That's all she inspired in me.

Then Lucien, because I wanna keep the two main protagonists for last. I remembered that he was one of my favorite characters, and so I was quite disappointed with my rereading. He is not nice with Feyre – which, understandable. She killed Andras, who was his friend, and he had to be at least helpful/civil toward her because they needed her to break the curse. That’s a horrible situation to be in. But all the times he insulted her… It was, at least 50% of the time, insults about her being mortal. To me, it feels like Lucien’s hostility toward Feyre was born of racism, and not of a personal history (her killing his friend). He did helped her UTM, but honestly with how their relationship was before that, I interpreted this help as him doing a favor to Tamlin/helping the only person who had a chance at freeing them from Amarantha. I do think that SJM intended for Feyre and Lucien to be friends, I just don’t think I read the book the way she wanted it to be read. And also, to be fair, Lucien wasn’t exactly really developed. Even his relationship with Tamlin was lacking, in my opinion. Lucien was sometimes (rarely) making fun of Tamlin, as friends do, or he was doing his report about sentry duty. Aaaand… that’s it. Tamlin reacted most of the time by being like “shut up, Lucien” and growling menacingly, which is, for one, not nice to threaten a friend, and two, all the time ? Come on, I understand the situation is really complicated, but be nicer to your friend, talk and joke with him, you’ll feel better Tamlin !

This will be our transition on Tamlin. He was quite nice during the majority of the book. I’m not exactly sure about UTM, but more onto that later. It was nice reading about all the efforts he kept making to get to know Feyre, and hilarious how bad he was at it. The Summer Solstice was one of my favorite scene, Feyre was so free and happy, and the idea of Tamlin playing violin for her on his knees… Yeah, I melt just thinking about it. He was a lot more anger-proned that I remember, but never toward Feyre, and she never felt threatened, and even if Tamlin did threatened Lucien, well,…  Lucien always came back to annoy Tamlin, and when Feyre, talking about Lucien’s eye, asked if Tamlin did it, Lucien was quite shocked, almost horrified, that she would think that. So I take it Lucien wasn’t feeling threatened or afraid of Tamlin, and therefore, despite being angry most of the time, Tamlin knows how to keep his temper under control and it wouldn't surprise me if he's the "quick to anger, quick to appease" type. (It’s still not nice to threaten people, especially friends).  About UTM, I don’t know what to think. Tamlin does know how to control his temper… to a certain point. He was never violent toward anyone during the book, but he did have difficulties to hide his anger, notably his claws which were almost always threatening to break out. And yet, UTM… nothing. He gives strictly nothing. No claws poking, no growling, nothing. I’m REALLY conflicted about it. It is, as Lucien said, a way, as small as it is, the only possible thing Tamlin can do to protect Feyre from Amarantha. But is it in character for Tamlin, who doesn’t seem to struggle to keep his poker face, even when he was an open book the whole time ? Was he so open with his emotions during the book because he was at home, with people he trusted and in a place where he was in control ? And so does it mean that UTM he wore a mask to protect himself and Feyre ? (this one should appeal to Rhys’s fans.) I DON’T KNOW. Maybe I think too much and it’s just an inconsistency/retcon on Maas part to justify Feyre leaving in the next book because “you did nothing to help me UTM”.

Either way, I liked Tamlin (and Lucien) less than I remember liking them the first time. But I have a theory : it’s quite possible that the unfairness and retcon that they both suffer in the two next books had me so offended on their behalf that I decided I would love them twice as much for every character who would treat them unfairly based on strictly nothing.

AND FINALLY FEYRE. Even if…, to be honest, I don’t really know what to say about her. She really is quite the typical YA female protagonist. She slayed the first challenge, it was one of my favorite scenes. And the last challenge was really poignant. Even if it was MORE than time that she used her brain. Seriously, this riddle was easy. Or maybe I read too much fantasy books, I don’t know. She was too complacent (not sure this is the right word, but nice is not right either soooo) with Rhysand. A guy that treat me like that, I hate him with all my guts, no matter what “helps” he gives me in the middle of all the abuse he inflicts on me. But well. Seeds for Feysand and all that. On that note, I think I read somewhere on Tumblr that Rhysand knew as soon as he met Feyre for the first time (on Calanmai) that she was his mate ? Not sure tho. In any case, it can’t be true because during their last conversation, just before they leave UTM, Rhysand says goodbye, then freezes and looks at Feyre with, uuuh, big surprise (stupeur in French). Sorry, my brain is melting, I have worked on this review for way too long. So I guess this is the moment Rhys knows she’s his mate. Which, now that I think about it, is really weird that he would be nice to her before that because let’s be real : Rhys don’t give a fuck about people not close to him. Oh, well. Either it’s a retcon, an inconsistency, or anything else, I’m done with this book. Next step : ACOMAF. Maybe I’ll find some answers. Maybe I’ll find more questions, more retcons, and a sudden want to cry. (Open-minded, Danette, remember that you must be open-minded).

To conclude, I was not surprised about Feyre and Rhysand, they were pretty much what I remembered/expected. Lucien and Tamlin were a little disappointing, but honestly not by much, because I knew my memories might be askewed and I know not to expect too much from SJM. This was a very mid read. Not too bad, not good either. 2, 2.5 stars.

Oh, and sorry for any mistakes. This post was long and I really don't have the strengh right now to proofread it. Maybe later, but probably not. I hope it's not too hard on the eyes.

[mistytpednaem]

wow!!! that was a year

as I begin to write this post I'm not even sure if I'm going to post it, lmao. I guess it depends on how much of a bummer it turns into. and if it helps me sort out some thoughts, then it won't have been a complete waste of time.

waste, huh...

on one hand, I don't... reaaaally?? want to talk about what's been going on in my life? but on the other hand, there's a part of me that's like "wow, Naem, that makes it sound like you've been struggling with some serious shit, which is straight up not true, do you just want people to feel sorry for you?" and then on the third mutant hand (I have a lot of those, it turns out) there is a different part of me that does acknowledge the way this other section of my brain jumps straight to accusatory self-flagellation is something many people do not, in fact, struggle with

I've been doing remote therapy this year! it's alright. my therapist has some wild ass takes from time to time, and it is perhaps one of my most substantial monthly expenses (note: yes I still live with my parents so, you know, I don't pay rent), but she IS insightful and a good professional so like. I feel, on the whole, it's working out well for me. a-aside from the part where I still can't seem to love myself consistently but unfortunately I don't think anybody else can fix that for me. I just... have to keep working on it.

speaking of therapy, maybe I should tell her in the next session "hey, cool new year, uhhh I keep finding myself thinking it isn't worth getting excited or feeling hopeful for anything because as time goes on there will only be more and more things to be sad about, because everything is finite and loss is a constant, and it's kind of bumming me out?" maybe I should. honestly, that was the thought this post was going to center around initially, but I've found other things to talk about, thankfully.

ah man. heck. I JUST narrowed down the exact thing motivating this post. "the dread I feel when i see everyone on social media post about their Year In Review." so much of this is about the unrelenting passage of time.

not everything is a huge bummer. experienced some good-ass media this year. Hi-FI Rush was really cool, Midnight Mass was so good it got me to watch it three times in spite of how bad I am with horror, Across the Spiderverse was as good as everyone said - speaking of Spider-Man, I think I've come to terms with adopting Curt Connors as a blorbo, which has nothing to do with Spiderverse but is, perhaps, a baby step in the direction of Accepting The Trash I Like. excited for more Jojolands. Jujutsu Kaisen S2 was really fucking good, so much so that I'm afraid no future arcs will grip me the same way. oh yeah, I got really into Will Wood this year, which is a bit embarrassing because his fanbase seems to be composed primarily of teenagers, but hey. sort of circling back around to me needing to accept what I like, I guess.

I've been taking other baby steps, namely towards Drawing More Often. I... have, right?? I know I haven't posted everything I drew, but it was definitely more than, say, two years ago. which is nice. hope I can keep that up or, even better, Do It Harder.

I don't have a habit of making New Year's Resolutions. I do have a couple of wishes, but I'm frankly not sure if they're anything I can control. Financial stability? Well, there are certainly efforts I can make in that direction, as much as I hate even looking at LinkedIn. To stop finding myself trapped in the middle of interpersonal conflict that I care about too much even when it doesn't directly concern me, resulting in weeks of heightened anxiety at a minimum? I think if it were within my power to stop that, I would have already done it, but uhhhhhhhhhhhhh

ah man. I should have found a nicer note to end this on. ummm.

I deeply appreciate all of my friends, not only for being generally rad people but also for seeing nice things in me when I can't. This goes quadruple for my girlfriend, who manages to do all that while also struggling with brains that are very mean and unfair to her.

I feel like I said this last year, but I hope I can learn to depend on you all a little less going forward. Not in a "get out of my life you LOSERS" kind of way, but in a "thanks for the support, here, I can stand on my own two feet, so don't worry about lending me another one" kind of way.

[hospitalterrorizer]

diary223

4/25-26/2024

thursday - friday

going in for closing tomorrow.

and i am staying up too late now. i should sleep soon, but today i went out, it was nice and fun, i almost read something in front of people but did not, maybe i should have but i was nervous about the people there, but the reading was nice, better than the ones we usually get to see. it's interesting what people who aren't in school for writing get up to.

i would have read that random thing i spat out a few days ago, the 'assemblage' which i still need to throw more into. i didn't really do any creative work today, i just relaxed outside of work, which wasn't so bad, terribly dull and a waste of time and life, but not exhausting especially. tomorrow might be, cuz i am closinnng.

doesn't matter though, soon this really will be all over.

i do need to get the cds i was wanting to get off discogs too, and then a birthday gift for my gf... i have something in mind.

beyond alll thissss, idk. tomorrow i might try to record. need to sleep soon to get to that at a reasonable time since i need to leave at 1 pm. and then fix my sleep again.

bluh.

thinking more about doing a reading of my own writing is exciting, it's nice that there's a place to do it and that i've got friends involved in that. one person who i really enjoy seeing/hanging out with/talking to.

i also read more agua viva, it is very specific, it reaches at such an internal point of me, and i think the act of living broadly, it is hard to transmit what it does, it can hardly transmit itself, it is a stumbling thing, the speaker says often, i want inconsistency, the inconclusive, the ability to not answer, the ability to dissolve, the cavernous, the flow of becoming. i too want this, to be near this flow. and to be near it, a source of pain, as much as the wanting is the pain too.

it is hard to write about but the more time i spend with it, perhaps the easier it will become, all books, the clots of writing and thought themselves, not authors, but the words, both in sound and play and in meaning or meaninglessness, these represent other ways of thinking and seeing i think, i believe that really, each one you open into something else, to contend with, another place to be, and in drinking in that, the delicacy and the voluptuousness of each, you do not leave it behind upon finishing but it is a new fold in a fabric along your interior, more studded grows the life we lead, textured and sparkling, attention goes to stranger places.

this is part of, i think, what the book reaches at. this painter character makes efforts to escape painting, nothing in plot especially, it is simply spoken, to enter into words, shirking off the act of painting. into, i am not sure, speaking, words, not an explicit poetry but one which is implied not by form but by gesture maybe.

anyhow, i do need to be sleeping, but one maybe embarrassing thing i was thinking about today, recently a favorite yt channel of mine uploaded an 11 hour playthru of illbleed, it was one of the first things he did on his channel, and something about the game but also his presence makes me very happy, it's somewhere a part of me that makes me feel consistent with myself, those images, that voice. another one, watching the infinite review and hearing owen/mechagamezilla. weird and pathetic becuz most yt stuff is so so so disposable and that's almost the point of what these people i like do, discard for the sake of it. there is just something there, they have i guess been parts of my life for like, a long time, mechagamezilla especially. i like that he now does videos about stuff that is not games, i always want gamers(tm) to get out of that, just broadly, it feels like part of why videogames seem stuck in lots of ways, as an art or whatever you want to call it. it's almost by design though, they so often take so much time, as hobbies. especially with the development of effectively infinite games, seasonal multiplayer, gambling simulation, infinitely randomizable games, a lot of roguelikes. it is weird.

anyway, i need to sleep actually, so

byebye!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[leekimdramas]

It's Okay to Be Sensitive 3 Review

For a drama with this name, it really said it's actually NOT okay to be sensitive.

A story about four friends trying to navigate through life and issues. Dating life, being an idol trainee, worrying about your siblings.

I have also reviewed the second season: It's Okay To Be Sensitive 2 (Every season is told with different characters, so you can watch it without seeing previous ones)

This review will have spoilers because I just wanted to rant about how I disliked it.

This season disappointed me so much that I don't even know where to begin... I'm pretty sure, the writer was changed because I have no other explanation.

The first episode talks about a scandal in which an idol had sex with someone. It is a good topic, but the way they dealt with it, was just embarrassing.

This episode has two points of view: that it's okay and it is not... And we never got to learn if it IS right or wrong...

This drama did not have to spell it out for the viewers but the other seasons are all about learning. For example what is considered sexual harassment, how women feel in those situations etc.

In the previous ones, they also talked about feminism and how it is okay to be a feminist. However, this season we're not really sure anymore???

Yes, they did say, they're all feminists at the end of the episode but it doesn't teach viewers anything.

The viewers just see 4 friends saying: "Feminism is bad because my date said so..." A second later it's good because that's what the second male said...

"Oh, we also sometimes feel shamed! Let's be feminists!" What is this writing????

This is such a current topic in S. Korea and all around the world, so why not take the time to teach something?

My only favourite thing was the whole drama with the idol trainee who got a sex tape leaked. It also was deepfake (I think), which is also an interesting topic.

Another great episode was when they said that a girl shouldn't feel pressured to have sex. That episode seemed like the old seasons.

The characters of the drama were.... Not that great? My favourite was the traine Do Eun and the men were okay.

But Ah Young was the most annoying person ever... They're 26 (around that age) but she's acting like a 5-year-old. Mostly it is aegyeo that she's always doing but she also seems to not have any thoughts.

After all of this, you would think that maybe, friendship would fix a tiny bit. But I'm not sure they were even friends???

Back to the first episode topic... They have a friend who was in a similar scandal (an even worse one). Why as a friend bring it all up??Especially than one of them is advocating that idols should not even love someone.

They also don't know each other's Instagram which I found weird... Again THEY'RE FRIENDS.

These are just two situations but there are more... At this point, they might be just strangers.

To sum it all up, this was a terrible season. Maybe, if you haven't watched others, it might be alright. However, knowing what this drama is supposed to be, makes me angry.

Just get a new drama with a new name.

2/10

[gemmahale]

Holy shit, Mads. This...this is something else. (Yes it's taken me 4 days to respond because I'm still reeling.)

The color coding is probably my favorite part of my entire set-up. I love color.

From your final notes: I shall not stop, for I cannot be stopped. 😘 Fics springing forth completely finished is more or less how I write. Little nuggets to nibble on, and eventually you'll get the whole thing lol. (Also thank you for comparing me to a deity, I think I shall swoon now.) And you should have less concern about your sanity because you're all caught up! 🤣 It'll be a lot slower now.

Anyway, I'm going to answer each review below the cut, because incoherent screaming doesn't cut it. 💚💚

Feylands Josie's my favorite of my OC's right now. She's such a smitten kitten. 🥰 (Also re: who Gary is - look up Roach's legal name. ����) I'm so excited to share more of this (when I get around to writing more, lol).

Call of the Wild As a wavy hair girl who's been doing too much research into how to style it, I love including small details that make my OC's/headcannon thoughts more human and varied - curly hair, hearing aids, etc.

(Side note: I think that prologue is actually from the Contract prequel. I might have it mistagged, that wouldn't surprise me. But yes, the sensations are so crucial to my stories too!!)

Corporal Distraction Augh, I need to get back to this one. I love the premise. Sleep-deprived Soap is a menace. 😎 The second take of this is one I like a lot more than my original attempt.

Flowers from My Love Eeee, I'm so glad you liked the casserole. I'm hoping I can use it to settle the 141's voices a little bit better. The moodboard was a riot to make, and Pepper is my baby. (I need to do a bit of background work on this one and more concrete plotting/plot solving, but I love it.)

Palace Hallways Ugh, I hadn't even thought of the D&D connotations until now! I mean, I sort of had, but I totally feel you on stories ending. 😭 Hopefully this one lives up to what I want to have happen.

Edge Dressing What if...I told you I had...hm...maybe a Laswell meeting Letty story in the cannon too? Hm? Maybe? (I make no guarantees it'll be Letty. It's a concept only at this point.)

Embroidered Secrets This one I have aspirations for. But I need to do more research. 🤓 I'm so glad you love it though, because that gives me motivation!

141 Studios I'm so glad you'd read a multiseries of this, because that's probably what it'll turn into! I love world-building and this leant itself so well to that. (And I have friends who have worked in the adult entertainment/porn industry that I can glean nuggets of info from.) This PS!Simon is suuuuch a big gruff teddy bear, I adore him. Also the lube thing - I had a partner that did lubed wrestling one summer at a kink retreat. I'm not surprised. 😂

Protege's Trust NOOOOOOOO. That peeves me (I know it was the accents that fucked it up - my phone autocorrects, my computer does not). Try this link if you want. Because it's SO GOOD. Enemies to ??? to lovers. Price/Gaz and Laswell/Compton reflections. What happens when your two protege's can't stand each other? You keep putting them in situations where they can't get away from it. (I think I've fixed the link now?)

Museum Muse You yelling about it in my DM's made me cackle. I'm glad you don't know what's going on, you'll find out.

Brix Annabeth is a goddess among mortals for being able to withstand that man's charms. (TBH I had totally forgotten about that scene because it did emerge fully developed - swear I was possessed writing that one.)

Squeamish Stitches Weirdest one-shot (maybe more) I've ever written. In the sense of "I don't know where I'm going with this beyond this one scene". Tbh, Ghost being a cock-block makes me laugh so hard because again, Gaz is down so bad for Glitz.

Useful Girl I love teaching people new things! Tbh, I learned that from a professor who was whinging about the fact that basically no one came to class on a day right after a holiday lol. Secretary wasn't a direct line I'd made (tbh I can't stand the film, oops), but I can see the resemblance!!! (They WILL negotiate on screen though)

Highland Tartans That line tickled me to write - I'm so glad you picked up on it. Again, historical research needed, but also literary license ftw ;).

WIP WRITES RIGHTS NOW! I SAID WIP WRITES RIGHTS NOW

blahblahmaster rant list link blahblah dont look at me

PSA when you only just discover a moot is a prolific writer you run to read all her writing and comment in excruciating detail cc: @gemmahale

blorbo x named oc fans, this one’s for you (it’s me, im talking about me)

please see below a random and incomprehensive ramblelist of my stream of consciousness as I sampled from gemma's works:

Feylands WIP

I find the content warning tags extremely titillating (also I have not seen such a prolifically well organized tag list AND color coordinated to boot like gemma’s blog???? putting my outlook inbox/work docs/excel sheets to shame!!!) and I don’t even read/like fae stories (yes I never read ACOTAR and I don’t plan to anytime soon, I missed that booktok ship, most likely cos im not on the tikky tokky as the children like to say, i watch the reposts on instagram like a proper mlllenial)

Josephine’s heart pitter-pattered at the compliment, heat climbing up her cheeks as she mumbled a thanks, their eyes locking again. 

🥰🥰🥰NOT THE PITTER PATTER

my inquisitive ass is already like “what’s gary’s real name” and “hearing aid = soap b/c of all the damn bombs he blows up?” “but i headcanon gaz with freckles, maybe it’s gaz? gaz = gary?” “or maybe ghost = gary?” GEMMA GIVE US WIPS I MEAN HINTS PUT ME OUTTA MY MISERY

Call of the Wild WIP

I love the little note gemma included about this being inspired by @deadbranch (shoutout to branchy btw my beloved) - honestly floored at all the beautiful fic/headcanon/drabbles/askfills ive read that are the brainchilds birthed from love for other creators’ brainchildren

also equally floored at how many of writers here are like “this incredibly layered/moving/tender/spicy/nasty fic came to me in a dream”

also SUBVERTED TROPES SUBVERTED TROPES SUBVERTED TROPESSSSS

Kyle cleared his throat, shifting his stance. “She prefers to be called a wolf.”

AHAHAHAHAHAHA GODDDD THIS WAS A ZINGER

“Please!” Kyle called back, face half covered in shaving cream.

i need fanart of this right fucking now let me, i mean shannon, sorry oops but haha..unless? finishing shaving you bby

and FUCKING ROACH IS IN THIS FIC HOLD ME BACK OR YOU *WILL* GET CAUGHT IN THE CROSSFIRE OF ME TEARING APART THE BARS OF MY ENCLOSURE BECAUSE MY BRIEF HYPERFIXATION ON ROACH IS BACK WITH A VENGEANCE FROM THIS SMALL SNIPPET AND IN THIS 500 PG DISSERTATION I WILL-

also THAT PROLOGUE APPETIZER SLAYED ME

“The way I see it, you’re fucked either way. You don’t make it out of here, you’re fucked. You become mine, you’re fucked - but in the good way.”

this + the mention of bulge + damp cheek definitely brought a visceral IRL memory for me (affectionate/horny)

also sidenote: it’s the little things that matter and gemma i see you gurl and salute you - incorporating things like hearing aids, mentioning roach is HoH/using sign language, shannon using a shower cap for her curly hair - 😘👌

Corporal Distraction WIP

holy MOTHER OF FUCK THIS SHORT LITTLE EXCHANGE IS FUCKING HOOOOOOOOOT

The captain moved closer to her, gently lifting her chin up with his finger. “So you’re the bird that’s got my sergeant distracted.”

“Sir?”

“Been trying to figure out what’s got Gaz so twisted up lately. Figured it was a partner, didn’t think it was a Corporal under him.” He didn’t release her chin, now holding it between his thumb and finger. “Has good taste, at least,” he muttered, eyes shifting to the Lieutenant, who only huffed in response.

any premise that fucks with/frustrates/sleep-deprives soap has my heart 🥰

Flowers From My Love WIP

the bit where they discuss the casserole perfectly encapsulates each of the boys imho - price grunting out a response, soap eagerly asking about the food (such youngest of the group/im baby vibes), gaz picking up on the note and name/# left, ghost grumbling and ofc he fucking HAS to bring up manchester- 

and the MOODBOARD!!!! God I fucking love when writers flesh out a bit of their worldbuilding with related art, moodboards, face claims, etc etc etc i WILL lick up every crumb from the floor like a starving doggo- fun fact, one of my first interactions in cod fandom was requesting a moodboard from @the-californicationist (also shoutout to cali my beloved)

and PEPPER THE SERVICE DOG OH MY LORD PLEASE GOD IF THE 141 MEN CAN’T BE REAL LET PEPPSY BE REAL PLEASE GOD IF I HAD TO ASK FOR ONE THING FROM THIS CURSED HELLSITE-

Palace Hallways WIP

my mind blacked out at artificer soap and knight kyle and druid ghost - I also just finished a campaign with my homegroup IRL not too long ago and we’re taking a long break before the next game while our DM preps and this is making me miss playing with them ;-;

Edge Dressing WIP

KATE KATE KATE KATE KATE KATE that’s it that’s the tweet

“She did, did she?” Kate murmured, scratching at Letty’s scalp and smirking as the woman went boneless against her.

yes only natural, i too would also go boneless if laswell was scratching my scalp and giving me a massage mommy? sorry. mommy. sorry? mommy. sorry?

Embroidered Secret WIP

if someone told me a year ago when I wasn’t into regency shows/fics that reading some COD AUs - yes fucking CALL OF DUTY, the military propaganda first person shooter video game - would change my mind - well id be more shocked than if someone flashed some ankle at my victorian pearl clutching ass

also please i love every single trope listed here

141 Studios WIP

“Our sweet soft girl Samantha (plus size rep ftw!) finds her niche quickly as the resident camgirl - creating a new set of films called "Tip of The Tongue", where she (and others) commentate on the scenes being filmed in a behind the scenes way.”

fuck i would read an entire multiseries for this premise alone???

Crew scramble around to clean up the sweat and cum streaked across the couch to reset for another scene.

fun fact - i briefly interned as a PA in college and one of the producers i worked with mentioned offhand that he once rolled up to a set that was cleaning up after a porn shoot and claimed they were rolling away literal barrels of lube 👀

“You the new girl?” His voice was deep, rumbling like stones cascading down a mountain.

NEW GIRL, OLD MAN, BLUE BIRD, CLOWN WITH A BUCKET HAT, I WILL BE ANYTHING FOR YOU PS!SIMON

A Protege’s Trust WIP

The most titillating tag of all..an empty one! lol jk im just messin with ya gemmy but actually yes i don’t see any posts with this tag

Museum Muse WIP

ahem you already know my rabid thoughts on this but noticed this new post re: multiple timelines and tbh do I know what’s going on? absolutely not - do I want to dive into this museum muse multiverse regardless? absolutely yes

Brix WIP

Re: “If it’s a story about learning to be loved again after a series of devastating losses, can that story then end on another loss? (And should the epilogue soften that loss by allowing them some sort of reprieve?)”

YES! i need to be in a certain mood to read angst but GOD WHEN I AM IN THE MOOD DOES IT HIT THE SPOT/FEEL SO CATHARTIC

also re: these comments - “Also, a bit of catharsis for my shitty experience working in the orchard industry.”

“It's less of a love story and more of a healing story. It's also a bit of a middle finger to the orchard that nearly hospitalized me. 🙃 (It's healing not only for the characters lol.)”

i find these types of fics are some of the best ive read when the writers have IRL experiences bleed into their writing - just has a certain je ne sais quoi about em

also i could be knee deep in sewage sludge and if i sensed soap within a 1 mile radius i would throw myself at him, brb busy handforging a trophy for annabeth for having enough willpower to continue working while JOHN SOAP MACATAVISH WHINES ABOUT WANTING TO COP A FEEL

Squeamish Stitches WIP

✨GLITz!!!! ✨fucking love this name

“God, I’d die here a happy man,” he grumbles into your thigh as you adjust your balance. 

His hands wrap around your calves, grunting as the treads dig into his shoulders. “No, between your legs.”

Ghost interrupts. “Keep it tactical, Sergeants.”

THE FUCKING BANTER? GHOST COCKBLOCKING GAZ? FUCKIGN SCREAMINNG

Useful Girl WIP

you had me at “we gonna get nast-ay kink-ay” and also got strong “secretary” with maggie gyllenhaal + james spader vibes 

also i had to look up ‘brown bottle flu’ as i’ve never heard that term before! ✨i learn somethng new with fanfic daily✨

She felt the breeze as the door opened behind her, the whiff of cigar smoke and cologne causing her to shift in her seat and sit up straighter.

if you’ve ever smelled/heard someone before you saw them it is *quite* the experience

“It's the prickle of the mountain's oncoming storm. It's the flapping of the flag in the howling wind. It's the explosion of lightning hitting a tree, splitting it open, part charred and part living - two states diametrically opposed to each other. It's the sigh of relief when the clouds finally part and the rain pours out. It's the breath of fresh air when the storm dissipates and everything is left clean.

It's yearning so hard for something that it leaves one fundamentally changed when they achieve it.

...I really ought to make moodboards for this fic. 😅”

this was an incredible fucking paragraph to read, fucking poetry right here, also incredibly erotic? though that might just be leftover brainworms in my head from watching shogun and a scene where one of the main charas describes an orgasm as “clouds parting after rain” 

Highland Tartans WIP

She reached her hand into his wool, petting him. “He comes from a good line and all, he’s just young.”

MacTavish laughed, sliding his hands to rest on his waist. “Aye, young and dumb. I know the type.” 🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺

PLEASE GOD GEMMA

I CANNOT CHOOSE FAVORITES BUT SPARE A THOUGHT FOR MY FREE TIME AND WORK HOURS WHEN YOU POST MORE OF THESE AND AT LEAST SPREAD THEM OUT SO I CAN KEEP MY JOB AND PAY MY BILLS INSTEAD OF GORGING ON YOUR WRITING

anyway to sum up i am fully convinced the multiverse lives inside of gemma’s brain because goddamn i am convinced once day some god-tier epic space opera multiseries is gonna spring out fully formed like athena from the gemmamind (yes I compared you to zeus, a mythical god, deal with it)

[divinegrey]

h̲i̲d̲i̲n̲g̲ ̲i̲n̲ ̲t̲h̲e̲ ̲b̲e̲d̲r̲o̲o̲m̲ ̲/̲ ̲k̲i̲l̲l̲j̲o̲y̲ ̲x̲ ̲g̲n̲!̲r̲e̲a̲d̲e̲r̲

first killjoy prompt! sorry to my friend who waited ages for me to write this LOL SDJKHFSHJF

prompt: college au with killjoy 👀

words: 1200

warnings: mentions of alcohol

Oh, jesus. 

You need to get out of this room. There are way too many people stuffed into the cramped living room of a sorority house, and you regret ever agreeing to come to this when you should probably be studying for an exam you have in a few days. Far too late to do that now; you’re a few too many drinks in to think about reviewing the biological processes of the amygdala. 

What’s the amygdala again?

You stumble up the stairs, tripping on every other step. 

The amygdala is the almond-shaped mass of gray matter inside the cerebral hemisphere, involved with experiencing emotions. 

Maybe you don’t need to study for your exam after all. 

Walking in the hallway, you press your hand on the doors. Each one you try, they’re all locked, and you’re not super interested in accidentally walking in on people having sex at a sorority party. 

To your luck, though, the door at the end of the hallway is ajar and you don’t hear any suspicious sounds of fornication. Taking your chance, you step in and shut the door behind you. After twisting the lock, you let out an exhale. Finally, some peace and quiet away from the blasting music and beer pong. 

“Uh, hi?” 

“Oh, fuck me!” You nearly jump out of your skin, a shock of fear clearing your head of alcohol within a second. Your head snaps toward the window sill, finding a woman sitting in it, wearing a green beanie and a puffy yellow jacket. Hands on your knees, you hunch over and let out a breath of relief. “Fuck, man! You scared the shit out of me.” 

“Sorry,” the woman says, turning away sheepishly. She flips a small device in her hands, focused on the moving parts and the shifting pieces. Given that this might be the only safe room in this house, you decide to make peace with your room partner, walking over and flopping down into a chair by the window. The woman glances at you, then back down. 

“Hey, wait a minute. You’re… you’re Klara, right? I think we had General Chemistry chemistry together a few years ago, with Dr. Callas,” you say, straightening up in the chair. The recognition passes over the woman’s face, and she fixes her posture, head cocked to you. 

“Yeah, you’re Y/N! You threw the paper airplane at her during the middle of a lecture and actually hit her,” Klara says, pointing at you with the mechanical toy between her fingers. “I can’t believe she didn’t expel you on sight. She’s on the college board of directors!” 

“That’s because I was so good I didn’t get caught,” you reply, folding your arms over your chest. You sigh. “Damn, that was a while ago. Gen Chem is a cakewalk compared to advanced organic chemistry.” 

“Doesn’t Dr. Callas also teach that class?” Klara tilts her head to the side, folding her legs in her lap. 

“Oh my god, yes, but she’s not as bad as she was in Gen Chem, I swear,” you say, running your hand over your head. “She’s the last chemistry class I gotta take for my degree, thank god.” 

Klara laughs, but doesn’t ask any further questions. Taking that as your cue to shut the fuck up, you lean back in your chair, pulling out your phone. Your friend Sunwoo is texting you, asking where you are. 

Upstairs with this chick named Klara, she’s pretty cool. She was in Gen Chem with us in freshman year, you reply. 

Her reply is immediate. shit, ur w killjoy! tell her i said hi c:

“My friend Sunwoo says hi with a smiling emoticon,” you say. Klara looks up. 

“Is it the c with the colons?” Klara asks, and you nod. At that, Klara rolls her eyes. “Jett’s got everyone doing that one instead of the proper colon with parenthesis smiley face. It’s ridiculous.” 

“Jett?” You tilt your head to the side. 

“It’s a joke— our entire friend group have codenames. We gave them to each other in the event that we all suddenly had to save the Earth from apocalyptic doom,” Klara explains, twisting the toy around in her hands until something pops out, and then she resumes fidgeting around with it. “Sunwoo is Jett, our friend Jamie is Phoenix, our dorm RA is Skye, so on and so forth.” 

“And you’re Killjoy?” You clarify. 

She rubs the back of her neck. “Yeah, I got that nickname because I do stuff like this. Hide away in bedrooms at parties I get dragged to.” 

Frowning, you reply, “That’s not a bad thing. It’s a smart choice, honestly. There’s enough dude-bro sweat down there to fill an olympic pool and it does not smell pretty.” 

“That’s what I said! It’s so disgusting, I don’t know how Jett and Phoenix deal with it. You’d think they’d learn to stop taking me to these parties, but they still do,” Klara says, and you can’t help but smile at the way she talks so animatedly, gesturing with the small toy in her hand. You’d be worried about her teetering out of the open window, but she keeps going on and on about how Jett and Phoenix are menaces to society, corrupting their poor freshman friend Neon. 

So you sit and listen to her, finding this to be the most refreshing thing about your night, sitting in this room with Klara. You catch up with her, talking about where you’ve both gone in the past years. Klara went into computer science and engineering, and you stayed the course of biology, hoping to eventually become someone important in the medical field. 

(“Remind me later to hook you up with my friend Sage! She’s a doctor, she could totally help you out, she’s super sweet.” “How’d you meet her?” “Uh… Phoenix ate shit on asphalt once downtown and Sage happened to be nearby and patched him up. It’s a whole story.”)

You learn that there’s a lot more to the surface than there appears to be with Klara— she’s shy at first, with the way you walked into the room and she said hardly a thing, but now that you’ve spent time with her, talking about the wackiest things known to mankind, she’s so energetic that its infectious. 

“Hey, this might be really forward, and you’re free to say no, but I know a ramen place that's still open. You wanna ditch the party and go?” You ask, watching the shock on Klara’s face happen in rapid phases. “It’s a ten minute walk from here, tops. I’ll even carry you the whole way.” 

You swear you see a blush on her cheeks as she tilts her head down, clicking the buttons on the toy rapidly. You’re about to rescind your offer when Klara gets down from the window and grabs your hand, pulling you off the chair. 

“You’re paying!” Klara says, but the words hardly register in your head when you look down at your conjoined hands. 

So much for going to a party, you think to yourself, hand in hand with Klara, bumping into each other’s shoulders as you go down the stairs and exit the house. 

~~~~~ A/N: KJ is very cute i love her lots

[nellie-elizabeth]

Bob's Burgers: Cheaty Cheaty Bang Bang (13x11)

I started watching Bob's Burgers a couple of years ago, but per my own self-imposed rules about reviews, I am just now getting to write my very first review about the show, having caught up to current episodes airing! This is a fun show, a distraction for my brain, good vibes and calming colors. I might not have a ton to say week to week, but let's dive in!

Cons:

I think of all the stories happening here, Gene's was probably the least interesting to me this week. He has a song stuck in his head, a jingle about fish delivery, and he keeps singing it over and over. The only real "punchline" here is that by the end, Louise has the jingle stuck in her head too, which Gene thinks of as a victory. It's not bad, it's just a background gag that didn't really do much for me.

Pros:

I like the concept in the A-plot this week, where Tina is worried about being accused of cheating. It's the kind of scenario I totally remember happening to me in high school, where maybe it was a thing where you sat right next to your friend and you could easily see their answers, and it wasn't so much that you were copying off of them, but maybe you took reassurance from the fact that you both got the same answers... but then what if some other kid who doesn't really know you, saw you doing that? Tina in full-on anxiety mode is always so funny. One of the things this show does really well with the kids is immerse them in their fantastical scenarios very fully. So Tina thinks the "bad kid" who told on her is some sort of terrible criminal, including making a comment about not having the number to "whatever burner phone she's using right now", which I thought was great.

Louise and Gene got to play sort-of supportive little siblings this week, coaching Tina through what she should do about her dilemma, while hiding it from their parents. I like that they're engrossed in Tina's drama to some extent, but also caught up in making their blanket fort and drinking hot cocoa, really enjoying their break from school and the restaurant. Probably my biggest chuckle came from Gene, when he and Louise knock on Tina's door and announce their presence by saying "Tina, it's your brother and sister... you know, from childhood?"

Then meanwhile, the heater is broken in the apartment, and Bob is struggling to get it fixed, while Linda tries to keep warm through such methods as warming up crackers and putting them on her face. Another comedy highlight was Bob and Teddy's phone call, where Teddy tells Bob to stop razzing people so much, as he cheerfully announces that he's lost control of his truck driving on the icy road. Bob is, as always, bewildered by Teddy's conception of his personality being so out of line with what we see him to be. But then Bob keeps accidentally insulting the "sensitive" repairman that Teddy recommends in his stead, leading Bob to worry that he won't come, and his family will freeze to death in the apartment!

In all, this was a solid, typical outing for Bob's Burgers. I always have so much fun hanging out with this family, they put a smile on my face every time.

8/10

[ca-3]

please tell us about cons and pros of p5! i'm really curious

I'm only halfway through the game so I can't really give it a definite review yet 🥲maybe I'll further write about my thoughts when I finish cause wow this game is WAYYY longer than I thought.

The game play itself is good and I don't have any real complaints there. I've been playing the game on hard mode and I'm still having a good time, the only times I lose a battle is cause I make a careless decision or simply cause I'm a newbie who didn't know what to do at first lol

Also I love a lot of the dialouges and interactions with other characters, some of it is really funny too.

All my grievances so far mostly comes from parts of the writing or how some characters are handled to sum it up. Also there are some problematic elements too... for example your character is a teenager and you're able to date any of your female friends and also grown women (including your teacher btw) but God forbid you date your male best friend who's been with you since the beginning, or any of the other guys who do seem to have some actual interest in you.

You can apparently even say you prefer men in a specific dialouge option; yet you still can't be gay??? Like make it make sense?? omfg

Game would be ranked even higher for me if I was allowed to be gay lol

Fanservice isn't too bad in this game and most of the girls thankfully aren't excessively sexualized except for poor Ann so far, like it's too the point I feel bad for her cause she used for that a lot when she's actually not like that at all, and is actually a real sweetheart.

I'm playing Persona 5 Royal to be exact which is the better version of the game it seems and I heard the game changed some pretty homophobic dialouges and one scene in particular from back in 2016(?) that was apparently controversial...but apparently the way they fixed it wasn't that much better either and I didn't even know about it until now :/

Edit: Also one personal thing for me exclusively, I kinda get overwhelmed on how to spend my free time in the game because how much you can do. Like I get caught in wondering if I should go raise social stats that could potentially really benefit me later or when theres like 6 different text messages in game and I don't know which character to hang out with, especially when it's multiple characters I really like. Jobs and many areas to walk around in and shop at and then other small mini games and activities you can do... I get a tiny bit overwhelmed yet I still can't put it down 😅 so my brain sometimes feels exhausted while playing. This is only a personal me thing.

But yeah tldr;

Pros: I have mostly positive feelings, game play is fun, I like most of the characters and I like being able to hang out with them, and I'm invested in the story and I can't wait to find out what happens next.

Cons: Don't have a lot bad to say. Just some of the writing and some details/aspects in it are kinda annoying/problematic or just a really weird choice in my opinion and it makes me a little bitter because I do like the game.

My feelings might change when i actually finish the game, but who knows lol

[fubukiswifenoimnotjoking]

One Punch Man ship reviews bc I’m bored

WARNING: BIG ONE PUNCH MAN WEBCOMIC AND MANGA SPOILERS

GenoSai: do I even have to say it?? They compliment each other so well and are already besties. They make me so happy and I love their love. Genos literally came into Saitama’s life and brought so much new life and excitement when Saitama thought he’d never get any. Genos gives him love and appreciation all the time and never abandons him. Saitama isn’t connected to his feelings, but he cares about Genos and would do just about anything for him, to keep him safe. Genos constantly teases Saitama and Saitama grumbles and takes it with some banter, Genos is super emotional and Saitama does his best to comfort him, they fucking love shopping together and just hanging out period, they talk about the dumbest shit and somehow they still understand each other with the one brain cell they both share. It takes Genos forever to realize his feelings are deeper and Saitama has to be TOLD by their friends that he should fucking realize his feelings already. Just...I could keep going but I’ll stop! 2718873737839439/10 (let’s not talk about the age gap btw, 6 years isn’t bad and Genos is a legal adult.)

FubuSai: the stereotypical straight ship ppl gravitate to. Eh. I can see it, but at the same time I feel like they don’t completely compliment each other. Are they a hot couple? Duh. But I feel like their pride and communication issues would get in the way. 4/10

TatsuSai: hnghhhh. Someone mentioned this before, can’t remember who, but Saitama literally thinks she’s a child in canon. So that just....makes it gross. Same problems as FubuSai but worse. I’d rather see them as hesitant friends w a weird bond. 0/10

SonSai/SonicSai/idk the ship name: eh, toxic. Cant see them getting past communication issues and pride, again. Plus Sonic wants to kill his ass. Also, I just feel no romantic tension?? Even in fanfic it just falls flat for me. 3/10

MumenSai: a favorite!! Wish I saw it more, it’s very cute. Mumen is so kind and would absolutely be there to help him w self esteem and just help him be a better person period. And Saitama would have a cute little kind guy to tease and open up to. I could maybe see Mumen’s kindness getting on Saitama’s nerves when he’s in a bad mood bc Mumen almost never snaps and Saitama feels shittier, or maybe Mumen being mad at Saitama for being kinda lazy at home while Mumen is working his ass off and he’s like babe I just got home, please stop playing the fucking game and pay attention to me I have a concussion again. Prob too nitpicky on this one, heh, but 8.4/10

Genos x Sonic: wtf? As a crack ship, sure. That’s hilarious. But as a serious ship, 1.3/10 bc I could MAYBE see them bond over their love of my chemical romance or sum.

Anyone x Puri: -128382839287473828739219833468282/10. Fuck Puri.

TatsuKing: eh. Indifferent on this one too. I can see them getting along and Tatsu being the mean but supportive gf in public, but a sweet gf in private. King could be like her calm oasis of video games and sweet blonde shy bf. I sway more towards ace/aro King and queer non binary Tatsu, but this is still good. 6/10

FubuPsy/Fubuki x Psykos/idk: hell yeah!! This series NEEDS more wlw ships, both for me to project onto and to cry over. Prob my fav Fubuki ship, cuz they’ve known each other since they were young and had a tenuous friendship. I didn’t use to ship it until I saw that scene in the wc after the MA arc (u know the one) but here we are. They’re big personalities so any interaction is bound to be chaotic at first, but I really think they’d work. Pride put to the side, Psykos could be someone for Fubuki to finally rely on other than the Blizzard Bunch, someone to confide in, a badass partner to fight monsters with, talk about nothing for hours with, be a super fashionable #girlboss couple with, and someone who would really see her for who she is-especially w Psykos knowledge of her from the past. Hell, Psykos might even know her better than Tatsumaki. Fubuki could be an anchor to her like she currently is in the wc, providing a quiet comfort and making her open up little by little. Would prob be toxic at first bc of the MA arc and their desire for power, but is a very good ship I think. 9/10

Speedal/Sonic x Mumen: an old fav! Sonic would have a hard time not hating Mumen at first bc he’s the picture definition of a hero, sum he hates. But hanging out with him would show him Mumen is a GOOD guy genuinely and he’d be like ohhhh shit I’m in love w this man. Mumen would thoroughly appreciate someone to make him live a little, break some rules and stand up to ppl when they talk over him. He’d DEFINITELY be upset when finding out Sonic is an assassin, but would prob be conflicted bc he knows Sonic is a good person despite that. Would prob make Sonic give up on killing for them to be together. Sucks bc of the assassin thing and bc they haven’t met in canon! So we’re not sure how they’d interact with each other, sigh. 7.4/10

Okamaitachi x Bushidrill: a very underrated ship! To be clear, I headcanon Kama as a trans woman and so does most of the fandom. Anyway, very sweet and already built as a friendship bc of their partnership under Atomic Samurai. I can’t remember who writes fic and makes art of them on tumblr but AAAAA it’s so good! Very sweet. Basically depicted Bushi as a nervous himbo who’s honest about his feelings but scared to say them and Kama as a sweet lady who’s crazy about Bushi. Very sweet. Want more of them!! 6.1/10

OneZon/Zombieman x One Shotter: never even thought of the ship till I saw @megidolan art work! Very wholesome, and from what little we know of Shotter we know he’s a sort of nervous yet strong willed guy, and Zombieman would totally help him calm down bc he’s so chill. I could see them sharing cigarettes and talking shit on heroes while cuddling u know? 7/10 only because I don’t see enough of it but very good concept.

Mumarou/Mumen x Garou: a lot of ppl are gonna hate me for this but....I don’t like it. I’ve tried! I just—idk. I’ve read so many good fics about them that make me like it a bit, but the concept is just eh. I think their relationship is, in most reps, really cliche angsty stuff. I wish I could elaborate I just...gah! Basically, there’s better ships for the both of them imo. Sorry!! 4.3/10

Sonic x Flashy/SonFlash: yes!! Prob my fav Sonic ship. They have soooo much tension, it’s almost worse than Genos’ tension w Saitama. Flashy LITERALLY poisoned Sonic so that he wouldn’t be forced to kill him at the ninja graduation. He cares. They’ll never say it out loud, but they care. They have someone who understands what they went through in each other and someone they’re both so similar to, yet so different from. Sonic is more vocal about his expressions and let’s people know it while Flashy often keeps things to himself, they could really influence the other to be more this or that. I could see a lot of comfort with these two, and not much is needed for relationship development; they already have so much unspoken between them after meeting for the first time in years. Love it. Wish I saw it more! 10/11

KingSai: wonderful! Out of the few ppl Saitama is close to, def my second fav pick for a ship for him. There’s a post saying how Saitama doesn’t cut King off when he’s going on rants about games and stuff bc he’s talking TO Saitama, not at him like Genos tends to do on accident. They’re already great buddies! Saitama could find a shy gamer man who he can talk to about manga and stuff and also a passionate bf who could break out of his shell w Saitama and be himself with no lies. King can have someone to protect him, duh, someone who finally understands his weird sense of humor, and someone to shower him in the love and kindness he deserves when Saitama is in the mood to be all out like that w his affections. Plus he’s Saitama’s anchor and brings him back down when he’s super anxious and depressed and tells him what’s up that he needs to fix without sugarcoating it. Would def have a bunch of inside jokes and go on dates that are just staying inside playing video games all night. Domestic af. 10/10

Fubuki x Mizuki: my first wlw Fubuki ship! Hard to find but very good. Mizuki is this big ball of kindness, energy, and raw power that would make Fubuki go ‘Ohhhhhhh, big pretty lady make brain go brrr.’ I could see Mizuki grounding Fubuki when she’s in over her head, giving her random gifts bc she saw sum and thought of her, doing a marathon run and wildly waving at Fubuki in the crowd, and all around being a dependable woman confident in herself and in love with a mysterious esper. Prob a little shy when it comes to anything physical bc she loves Fubuki so much and is overwhelmed by the realness of being w her. Fubuki gives Mizuki advice on ‘acting like a proper hero’ or whatever and though Mizuki thinks she doesn’t need it, Fubuki still helps her a lot w her career and being taken more seriously by others. Would give Mizuki someone who loves her for who she is and would go wild on her in private when she can be open about her affection, would be someone Mizuki could exercise with and listen intently to Mizuki’s physical knowledge, and would absolutely bandage her when she’s all banged up. Hnghh love this ship. It’s only behind the FubuPsy ship juuuuust a little bc they haven’t met in canon so we can’t be sure about their interactions and stuff. 8.8/10, I love WOMEN

Batarou: how could I go this far without mentioning them?! They have SOOOO much tension in the centichoro fight, like come on. Both snarky assholes who are huge softies one the inside, Badd being the more logical one (still a himbo, tho) and Garou being the more chaotic one. Probably take forever to admit their feelings bc they’re so prideful and stupid <3 flirt through constant wrestling matches and it takes Genos saying ‘they should kiss already, they’re getting on his nerves’ for them to finally realize what’s up. (@rayadraws has a great au where Garou Genos and Badd are a chaotic friend squad and Genos is the only brain of the group, haha. Very good au y’all check it out!) Would constantly pick on each other affectionately and switch into concerned SO when the other is hurt like the big teddy bears they are. Raise Zenko together for sure. Garou would fumble being romantic and Badd would find it both hilarious and cute. 11/12

Zombie mask/Amai x Zombieman:

So. I don’t like Amai Mask and I used to hate him, BUT the webcomic and fic have really helped me calm down on him (he’s still a dick tho), so it’s easier to want to ship him and stuff. Bc of Amai’s anger issues and controlling behavior, I could see this relationship being super toxic and icky—but I think they have some form of understanding that pulls Amai back from being a complete dick, you know? Start off as fuck buddies and slowly form something else from spending companionable time together other than screwing. Zombieman pulls Amai back from his angry fits and soothes him over with his logic. Talk maaaaaad shit about heroes, but only when they’re alone because Zombieman knows Amai will talk loud af about the heroes they’re roasting and Zombie doesn’t wanna stop a fight from happening. Zombieman loves making Amai flustered and has a secret check list in his head of all the things that get Amai red faced. Loves to listen to Amai rant about things for hours and loves to watch his face go through almost cartoon like expressions as he talks. He won’t admit it, but Zombie loves to be spoiled by Amai’s shit tons of cash and often takes rides in Amai’s limos when he wants to smoke and think to himself. Amai has a hard time realizing how his feelings have changed, but gets hit hard with it when he wakes up to Zombie making them breakfast one morning while wearing Amai’s underwear. Amai also loves to spoil Zombie and takes him out to restaurants and buys him cool new weapons on the weekends. @batneko has pretty much gotten me into this ship and I strongly suggest looking at their works! 7.9/10

DemonKnight/Genos x Zero/Drive Knight: I’m pretty sure this used to be a crack ship before the past like 10 manga chapters—and now here we are! Not a fav bc 1. ZERO LEFT GENOS TO SELF DESTRUCT AFTER THEY COMBINED TO FORM THE FUCKING JET HE WAS JUST LIKE lol bye SO LIKE if he left him to die that’s super hard for me to forgive and ship grrr 2. Disregarding the manga’s canon and looking at the wc, while I love the little trip they went on where Zero demonstrated his abilities and helped Genos kill monsters, it’s super sus. He knew alllll of this info on Metal Knight and was super supportive and understanding when Genos said he needed time to think. Like,,,what are his intentions? We know so little about him—is he trying to trick Genos or was he being sincere? THAT STUFF ASIDE, they’re a really fun ship. They’re both huge fucking nerds and can keep up with their talk on robotics for hours, they’re both cyborgs so they understand each other’s pain, and they’re both super cool and angsty. I think they could really settle into a deep bond that can go platonic or romantic, just depends. Genos needs more ppl in his life so hell yeah! Plus, he can really let go with Zero bc they don’t have that teacher/student relationship and Zero, if he’s really a sincere and kind guy like in the wc, can be there for Genos and listen to him. Don’t have much to say on this ship other than @wellthisisembarrassing makes GORGEOUS art of them! 6.3/10

Webuiko/Suiko x Webigaza: YEAH I KNOW THEY HAVENT INTERACTED IN CANON AND WE DONT KNOW MUCH ABOUT THEM BUT HEAR ME OUT. Webigaza—cool af determined cyborg idol who’s surprisingly down to earth when talking with Child Emperor. Suiko—sassy and honest fighter who doesn’t take shit and is very passionate. Suiko would go to talk to Web then immediately freak out bc aaaa she’s way prettier than she thought, she can’t do this! Web would have to gently encourage Suiko to talk and at first is like ‘ah man, must be an adoring fan, ugh I’m so tired. At least she’s hot’ but when Suiko snaps out of her shyness Web is like oh! She’s super cool wtf. Always bump into each other during fights and help each other get fixed up, Suiko using her muscle power to lift Web’s pieces (and give Web a great view of Suiko’s muscles holy SHIT) and Web would patch Suiko up. Not to be stereotypical, but they’re def a masc/femme couple. I love the idea of this ship soooo much and I really hope they interact! 6.6/10 only bc they haven’t met 😭😭😭 look them up on here! There’s some great art of them by a few blogs

Dr. Kuseno x Bang: pretty sure @baldyborg came up with this one! Super cute. Just two old dudes finding a nice friendship in each other, maybe after Bang helps carry Genos to Kuseno’s after a day of fighting. Bang would find Kuseno to be a very cute little nerd man and would be sooo impressed by Kuseno’s mad scientist skills. Kuseno would be super impressed when seeing Bang in action too. They’d prob talk as soon as they meet each other and Genos would be in the background like you guys it’s been an hour, please fix me I’m on the verge of death 🧍🏻Bang would give Kuseno advice on training techniques to teach Genos and advice on making his bodies more martial arts ready or sum, meanwhile Kuseno would give his take on how to be kinder to Garou so that Bang would learn to repair the relationship with a gentleness he’s seemingly lacking (yes I’m talking about the chapter where he and Garou start fighting and Bang is just not doing enough to reach out to Garou, he’s being a callous old man! So yeah I’m still mad about that). Genos and Saitama would prob be out on a date and Saitama would be like oh theres Bang, wonder what he’s doing? Then Kuseno would walk up and kiss Bang and Genos and Sai would be shocked like SIRS 👬 Genos would tell Bang he doesn’t need another adoptive dad and Bang would be like....ok.... I see them retiring in a cottage together and Bang would become a huge softie. Yes I’m actively ignoring chapter 141 of the wc, shut up. 7.6/10

TankTop master x Mumen: they have a nice friendship going on in the manga right now! Just bros supporting bros. Tank is the picture definition of a muscly himbo and Mumen is his cute passionate bf. Also workout buddies af!! Don’t have much to say other than pretty good ship, just not a fav. 5.2/10

To sum it up—

GenoSai: 2718873737839439/10, Batarou: 11/12, SonFlash: 10/11, KingSai: 10/10, FubuPsy: 9/10, Fubuki x Mizuki: 8.8/10, MumenSai: 8.4/10, ZombieMask: 7.9/10, Dr. Kuseno x Bang: 7.6/10, Speedal: 7.4/10, OneZon: 7/10, Webuiko: 6.6/10, DemonKnight: 6.3/10, Okamaitachi x Bushidrill: 6.1/10, TatsuKing: 6/10, TankTop Master x Mumen: 5.2/10, Mumarou: 4.3/10, FubuSai: 4/10, SonSai: 3/10, Genos x Sonic: 1.3/10, TatsuSai: 0/10, anyone x Puri: -1283828319833468282/10

If there’s any ships I left out, it’s bc I don’t know them, don’t wanna talk about them, or just don’t have an opinion strong enough. Also, I know there are some poly ships like Genos x Saitama x Fubuki, but I’ve read only one fic about that (it was pretty good, here’s the link https://archiveofourown.org/works/5406992 ) so I don’t feel like talking about it. Hope no ones offended! All my opinion here :)

[histrionicwoman]

‘Girl, Interrupted’ Isn't a Good Movie, You're Just Fifteen

This is a piece of writing that I am going to release on my Medium page in the near future. Link in my bio to follow me there.

I know the title of this might be a little presumptuous of me given that I myself am a seventeen year old, but I’m just going to have to ask you to hang in there with me for this one.

Last night, I stayed up a little later than usual (4:00 am) and watched a movie that had been on my list for quite a long time: Girl, Interrupted. I had some pretty high expectations for this movie, being not only a teenage girl, but also one strangely invested in the “indie sleaze” scene. The movie was not good. I know that might upset a few people, namely the ones plastering edits of the movie all across my TikTok For You page along with a Fiona Apple or Radiohead song, but I think I have some good reasoning for my opinion.

The movie was just… dumb. That’s really the only way I know how to portray it. Girl, Interrupted was like if someone tried to make a Harry Potter movie, except for instead of magic wands and owls the girls had varying mental illnesses and severe individuality complexes. I can’t express to you how frustrating this movie was to watch. 

So why are teenagers so fixed on it right now?

I’d like to propose two theories on that front: Fashion and sadness.

If you’ve been on TikTok recently, preferably the “indie sleaze” side of TikTok that I mentioned earlier, you’ll know that sadness is never efficient on its own anymore. There has to be a glamorous twist; a haunting Lana Del Rey song in the background, your $450 Marc Jacobs outfit fully in view, a full face of makeup melting off your face as you cry. This is the way to be sad. This is the way to portray your mental illness, this is the way to let your followers and peers know that you, too, experience a range of human emotion and aren’t like all those other ogres showing only their happy sides on their public accounts. A part of me kind of feels proud of these people on TikTok, strangely, because they have achieved some semblance of openness, something I haven’t really been able to do. But another part worries for them and everyone in the audience, because feeling like you can’t cry unless you have your $30 mascara on can’t feel great, can it?

I’ve got to give the movie credit where it’s due, though; Girl, Interrupted really nailed the whole “depression chic” thing. I mean, look at these girls’ outfits: Jolie’s emaciated t-shirt look (a popular thing right now, strangely enough; I could write a lot more about this if I was so inclined), Winona Ryder’s quintessential 90’s hipster getup (why??? It’s set in the 60’s), and Brittany Murphy’s complete serve-a-thon with her 60’s housewife-chic looks. I have to say, I am a bit biased for Murphy’s outfits. They were great, and that’s something I think a lot of other teenagers are attracted to in this movie; it somehow has all of the current trends encapsulated while also being a vessel for some semi-relevant piece of “commentary” (if it can even be called that) on mental health for girls. The bad thing about it, though, is that the commentary is just… bullshit. It really isn’t anything. If I had to try to pick out a meaning of the story, I’d say something like, “Don’t make friends with the girl who’s been in the psych ward for eight years,” or “If you’re a ‘sociopath’, you should really sit down and think about your actions instead of being so mean to everyone all the time”. As a viewer, you don’t get much closure at the end of the story and it just seems like Susanna got better and left everyone else to go be normal again. 

The thing that truly perplexes me about the current fascination with this movie is the question: what are people getting from this movie that I’m not seeing? Is there some message that I didn’t receive? In my Letterboxd review of the movie (shameless plug: tinymandarin on letterboxd), I said something along the lines of “Maybe I just don’t like low-rise jeans enough to understand this movie”. I would love to believe that a part of me is just missing the point of Girl, Interrupted, and that it’s a really good movie. But I really don’t think it is. I think the people who are loving it right now are younger teenagers who need some sort of relatable mental health story for people like them, who need their pain to be wrapped up in a coat of fashion and glamour, like a pet taking medicine. I’d like to end this by saying: If you’re a parent whose child likes this movie and wants to buy baby tees and low-rise jeans, by all means let them do it; but also check in on them and maybe show them a better movie to project their emotions onto. This one’s not very good.

[kashimos-hajime]

fragrance | a.h.

summary: Plato said, “The god of love lives in a state of need. It is a need. It is an urge. It is a homeostatic imbalance. Like hunger and thirst, it's almost impossible to stamp out.”

WARNINGS: LMAO SMUT (18+), oral (m!receiving), swearing, drinking, nervous and awkward y/n and hotch heehee pairing: college!aaron hotchner x fem!reader word count: 4.8k

a/n: lmao so i watched a tiktok of THAT SCENE in love and human remains so i am legally obligated to write what inspired me. ok but @venusbarnes,,, it happened,,,

part of the bitter end universe but not required beforehand to read this. takes place in their second year of college

In retrospect, you know you’re freaking out over nothing.

You just showered, changed outfits twice, tried to fix your hair, inspected your makeup constantly since you’ve finished, and tried to figure out a way to call it off to pass the time.

Why are you even worried? Ever since you’ve gotten off the plane, which, in itself, is a step you cannot backtrack since you are merely a college student with limited funds, your knees have been weak and you feel like you don’t really have a stomach.

Why? It’ll be fine.

You’ve been over Aaron for two-and-some-months years, now. The distance did you good, did you both good. Namely, you’re quite damn sure you don’t feel anything for him anymore besides the occasional flicker of irritation, the excited burst in your stomach, the absolute terror of seeing him again.

How has he changed? It feels like it’s been so long.

You glance at the clock.

9:55

You said 10AM. You have five minutes at the most to get yourself together and just run down the staircase, shove yourself into his presence before your nerves can tell you to turn back. Taking a deep breath, you look at your reflection in the mirror one last time before heading to the desk and grabbing your wrist watch. It’s worn down leather is soft to your touch and you feel an overwhelming sense of calm overtake you.

This will be fine.

As you fasten it to your wrist, you glance at the face. Time seems to tick by slower as you pull on your ankle boots, swipe a finger over your lip, and grab your room key. As you descend the cold stairwell, memories grasp at your consciousness, tease you, but you push them away and instead focus on putting on foot in front of the other, focus on gathering the courage to stand in front of him again.

Before you know it, you’re opening the door and walking over to the pacing figure you only know to be your best friend. His hair is still long, but he’s wearing a leather jacket, so that’s new, and he’s frowning to himself.

And it makes you smile, because that’s him. Aaron Hotchner, master frowner, broody boy. His hair is still long, his eyes still so dark. He hasn’t changed.

God, what will you say to make him laugh?

“What’s the deal with the jacket, George?” you say without thinking.

“George? And here I thought I was John,” he replies just as quickly, matching your tone and your entire heart lurches into your throat as your smile grows stiffly.

Crap. 

And that’s when you realize that, quite frankly, that convincing yourself that you’re over Aaron Hotchner is going to be a lot harder than it looked at first.

You’re fighting the urge to let the whole facade drop, but you can’t because this is Aaron, your best friend you haven’t seen in forever and although you’re so fucking happy to see him, you know everything is easier said than done.

He’s just your best friend, and you’re… you’re… feeling great. Your stomach is a bundle of nerves but that’s because you’re excited to spend time with him. Right?

“So, where to?” you ask, feeling quite exposed as he looks at you strangely. “I’m starving,” you say, an overwhelming need to explain causing word vomit to spill out of your mouth, “so, I was thinking we could get some breakfast, first. I’m in the mood for anything really.”

“Oh,” he says. “I have a place in mind.”

“O-okay. Lead the way, then. It’s kinda chilly out, isn’t it?”

“Uh, yeah. Do you needa grab another coat?” he asks as you step closer and they begin to walk to the door. He opens it for you and as you slip past him, your entire system shuts down. Your mind heads straight for the gutter, vivid images, voices, feelings from your dream flashing through your head.

Cheap beer, smoke, sweat, and a cologne you can’t forget.

Shit. Shit. Shit. Shit. Shit.

“N-no. I’m okay. Are you, uhm, are you going to be okay in just that jacket? It looks great, by the way.” Are your hands shaking or is that just the swelling throat and the hard lump in your gut’s fault?

Shit. Holy shit. Shit. Shit. SHIT.

“Thanks, and, uh, no. I’m okay. Are you okay?”

You nod and smile shakily. “Great. It’s just… I’m really glad to see you.”

He stops for a moment, stares as if he knows or maybe you just feel naked in your own skin, and then matches your timid smile. “I’m really happy to see you too.”

Right. What did you say again about nerves?

[TWENTY HOURS EARLIER]

“You guys better behave,” Aaron sighs. “I’m not gonna be responsible if I have to deck Carter.”

“Woah there, Hotch,” his roommate comments, sliding off his bed and slinging an around his shoulders. “You have a girlfriend.”

“We’re on a break, actually.”

“I thought you don’t believe in breaks.”

“Well, we’re just talking things out with the long distance thing. It’s not like when she was in high school. She just needs to adjust to her first year, and we’re still talking. So, it’s more like… an intermission before we resume after mid-terms.”

“So, you’re single.”

“Technically, but I’m also not looking,” he retorts, just in case his roommate tries to set something up behind his back, but the guy merely shrugs.

“Whatever you say, Hotch-o.”

He scowls, getting up and running a hand through his hair before grabbing his jacket off the hook. “I’m just trying to say that Y/N’s been there for me since before you guys and before Haley.”

“I get it,” his roommate, named Earl, says as he flips the collar of his varsity jacket and grabs the room key. “She’s like a sister to you, right?” Aaron doesn’t say anything to that and Earl doesn’t prod him any further as he grabs his backpack and slings it onto his shoulder. “Don’t worry, Hotch. I’ll spread the word to the guys. They won’t try anything.”

“Yeah, thanks, Earl.”

“I’m heading to class, but it’s the bar tonight, right? You’ll pick her up from the airport?”

“Yeah.” The door opens and closes with a click and Aaron lets out a sigh, turning away from the mirror so he can stop pretending he’s trying to fix whatever Earl thought was wrong with his appearance. He just wanted to stay busy so his friend could leave him alone to his messy thoughts.

He had received your last letter on Monday, confirming your flight for the Thanksgiving weekend. You’d be here with him and his friends for three days.

It wasn’t his idea, nor yours. Sort of like… a mutual epistolary understanding that enough is enough and one of them should just… go.

You had volunteered for that. You had always wanted to see Harvard’s gorgeous campus, according to your last letter.

Aaron runs a hand through his hair and sighs. He has one day off to catch up on the work assigned, get ahead of the reading, and just relax before his friends drag him off to hang out until the sun rises for an entire weekend. He’s sure you’ll love it. You’ve always loved staying out at night where it’s light, watching the sunrise and going to sleep to it.

Despite everything, you enjoy the solitude the night, the contemplative silence of it. Just like him. 

He can’t wait to see you again.

Sitting in the RA office and watching time tick by, he can’t help but feel like something is chaining him down. A heavy weight sits between his shoulders and he stares at the clock for what feels like a short eternity, unable to focus.

The day is slow in its passing, and a growing, unwanted hollowness begins to fill his soul as he half-heartedly finishes his criminal causation theory assignment, reviews for the quiz on Tuesday, and reads the next chapter on the foundations of the criminal justice system. He doesn’t really pay attention to any of it, though, and he feels like his head is stuffed with cotton as he gets up for the first time in hours and stretches, glancing at the time.

Your plane is supposed to land at 6:30.

It’s 6:00 now, and he was supposed to eat dinner before going to pick you up.

Shit. He’ll just have to eat at the bar.

Gathering his books and papers into his bag, he slings it onto his shoulder, trying to ignore the cold sweat clamming his hands up just as the phone in the RA office rings. It’s so jarring her starts, turning to the device and his heart pounds in his throat as he goes to grab it. Duty to the job means he has to, even if he might be late. You’ll understand, right?

“Hello, Resident Assistant speaking,” he says with a sigh.

“Hey.”

“Y/N?”

“Yeah, it’s me. Student Services was kind enough to reroute me.” A car beeps behind you and he frowns, holding the phone closer to his ear as he adjusts the strap on his shoulder to sit more firmly. “I’m calling from an airport payphone, but bad news. My flight got delayed, so I can’t come to the bar tonight. I’ll be arriving, like, dead in the morning. Two or three AM.”

“Damn. The boys will miss meeting you,” he says, unable to help the unhappy but forced smile. It comes across as a grimace but he hopes you appreciate the effort. It’s what you’d say if you were here.

“The boys?” you echo, amused. “Well then, tell the boys that they’ll have to wait until morning.” More seriously: “I’m really sorry, Aaron. I was so excited to see you tonight.”

“Yeah, me too. It’s—it’s okay. Don’t worry about it, Sunflower.”

“Sunflower?” you repeat and Aaron feels his throat shrink to the diameter of a needle. “You don’t call me that unless you’re genuinely sorry about something bad. Like, death-bad.” Then, a bright laugh that shouldn’t bat away the dreary disposition overcoming him, but it does. “Aaron, it’s not that important—just one night. Look, let’s meet up at 10AM in the hotel lobby tomorrow morning and make up for it, okay?”

“Yeah.”

“Great. See you in a bit, Hopscotch.”

“Bye.”

He heads to his room, your voice echoing in his head. Freshening up with a splash of cold water and a rake of a comb through his hair, he explains the situation to Earl as they head down to the bar near campus where some of the other guys are already drinking.

“That’s too bad. Would’ve been nice to meet her.”

“Tomorrow, Earl. She isn’t cancelling.”

“I know, but y’know, it would’ve been fun to beat her in darts.”

“You’re awful at darts.”

“Bigger opponent pool. C’mon, cheer up, Hotch. It’s just a delayed flight, you said so yourself.” More grumpy silence. “Hey, I know what’ll cheer you up. First shots are on me.”

.

His cheeks flushed with heat, he grabs at the shot blindly and throws it back, laughing as his friends get on the dance floor. The bar seems to haze before him. The darkness is pierced by blue lights and red as the shadowed patrons swing to and fro on the floor. Everything is gauzy, edges blurred as the lights flicker and filter through the crowd. Aaron slouches against the booth, smirking at the way Earl’s trying to lay the moves on a girl who merely walks away and he flashes a sympathetic thumbs up before his friend simply rejoins the rest of the guys on the floor.

Everyone had chipped in to buy him round after round in order to get him to loosen up, and it’s hard to admit, but it’s worked. Everything is ethereal, and he feels like he’s floating through life.

He wants to dance, but he doesn’t think he can stand on his own two feet, to be honest. His entire world is tipped and the silly smile on his face isn’t going to disappear any time soon as a figure makes her way through the crowd, making her way towards him. It catches his eye, the way she moves around people, keeps her head held up.

He can’t quite see her face but even then, he knows that he knows her.

“What are you doing here?” he asks before he can stop himself, like he isn’t in control of his mouth. He gapes as the woman sits down beside him. Her skin smells like sweet fruit and the sting of tequila as she slings an arm around his neck, and his entire stomach flips as she leans over, her arm bent and her fingers playing with the hair by his ear. “You’re not… you’re not supposed to be here.”

“Why not?” she asks, twirling hair around her finger as she gently trails her other hand down his chest. “You don’t want me here?”

“No, no, I’ve missed you, I just—” Her palm runs lower, over his stomach and further. His head whips towards her and he catches the sweet, dulcet notes of warm vanilla spice shampoo. It calms him, sweet in his sinuses and he watches her indistinguishable face. Despite not seeing quite clearly, he knows she’s beautiful with an unintentionally seductive smile, a tentative charm to her movements.

The hand stops and a heat burns through his chest, following the trail she’d carved into him and he feels blood drain from his head so viciously it leaves him lightheaded.

“Just what?” she asks quietly, yet still so loudly over the pub’s pounding music and he groans softly, head tilting back.

“Shit. I just didn’t expect you here. I should introduce you to my friends—” He wants to get up but finds his entire body moving through molasses. He can barely lift a finger and, through the blurred streams of the conscious and the subconscious, he knows he doesn’t really want to.

He doesn’t want to share.

“Oh, then let’s go.” Her hand lifts but, like a flash of lightning, his fingers wrap around her wrist and keep her firmly against him. “Aaron.” Chastising this time, like he’s a housecat, and she, the exasperated owner. Fingers thread through his hair as he grins at the woman.

“I’m not keen on sharing you right now,” he admits, eyes falling to lips that press into a wondrous smile. “I don’t feel keen on sharing you ever.”

“Is that a fact?” she asks, and he nods, his nose brushing against hers as she leans down to kiss him. Her mouth is warm ecstasy, like cider on a cold winter day that burns through his blood, and his heart is beating everywhere at once—in his throat, in his fingers, between his legs. Fingers card through his hair as his hand finds the curve of a hip and he pulls.

Immediately, as if sensing his intentions before he even thinks it, the woman swings a leg over his hip and straddles him, the dress riding up luxurious thighs and he chuckles to himself as her hands find his neck, thumbs brushing over the sharp cut of his jaw. Her mouth opens against his, breathing into the next ferocious kiss again as his hands trace the shape of her, the swell of her legs, the cool heat of her skin against his burning hands.

“What do you want from me, Aaron?” she whispers, leaning in close enough that he can feel her lips against the shell of his ear, and then down his neck. He gasps, breath catching in his throat as her hands gently squeeze his throat as if reminding him of her previous question but he can’t quite speak. She kisses down past his collarbones, pulls down the neck of his shirt teasingly and peppers kisses to the skin that she can reach. Her fingers are pressing into his pulsepoint, the other hand travelling down his waist again and he knows she can feel it, the hard bulge pressing up between her legs. 

She trails back up again, her kisses teasing the corner of his mouth and he turns, trying to catch the elusive minx only to delight in her light laughter when she pulls back.

“Tease,” he mumbles, eyes shut tight and only then do her lips find his again just as fingers pull at his belt buckle and he sucks in a breath as she glances down with him, curiously running her knuckles gently along the curve of it. His Adam’s apple bobs when he swallows down his gasp and he hears her chuckle. As if he’s a mere bystander to his own actions, Aaron watches his hands trail up the sides of her and slowly find purchase on her shoulders.

With the gentlest of pressure, he pushes down, and it’s like she melts between his hands, legs sliding, entire body sinking as his legs open wider to welcome her. Her breath is warm as she unzips his jeans, fingers prying his boxers down until they brush against it, pulsing and hard against his abdomen.

“Jesus,” she whispers but he hears it so clearly, her breath teasing the tip as fingers wrap around his dick. A strong, warm tongue follows, from the bottom to the tip, tracing the vein and every single ounce of oxygen leaves his body when she goes down on him, endlessly warm and wet. Hands wrap around what isn’t in her mouth and his fingers find her scalp, grabbing fistfuls of hair as his head hits the wall behind him.

Swallowing tightly, a lopsided smirk crosses his face and he lets out a soft sigh when she tilts her head, takes him in until she’s gagging on it. His hips twitch but a hand against his pelvis stalls him, a firm pressure that makes him open his eyes and look down to see her already staring back at him. Eyes dark, lips shining in what light there is, he nearly loses it right there as she swallows him down, making his entire body clench. His jaw tight, he lets out a hissed moan and the hand not on her head grabs his thigh, trying to stave off the desire to fuck her mouth.

The bass beat of the pub beats in his head as the hand on his hip finds the hand on his thigh, traces the tense veins along the back as her head slowly draws up, teeth grazing, tongue flat against his cock.

And then, down again, heavy breaths against his navel through the nose, and he’s in fucking bliss as the woman just goes on and on, deeper and deeper and when she gags, it almost makes him lose his already ill-tempered control because her fingers dig into the back of his hand, the other one squeezes the base of his cock, and stars explode behind his eyes as he chuckles breathlessly, blindly to the ceiling.

A ringing splinters through his skull as he groans, the need to thrust growing too powerful but she squeezes his hand, telling him to stay still without ever lifting her mouth off his cock. He can hear it, the sounds of her wet mouth rising and falling, sucking and licking and fuck, if he’s not going to come down her throat—

Her tongue drags along the underside of his cock as she pulls away, hollowing out her cheeks and dragging her fingers up his painfully hard erection, through the wet slick her mouth left behind and she pulls herself up, back bending underneath his hand, chest pressed flush against his and he can taste her again; the sweetness of vanilla, the sweat the pub brings all its occupants, the desire that fizzles so wantonly against his tongue.

“Am I still teasing?” she asks, lips brushing against his chin before he’s lifting his head again. Her hands run over his chest, find the planes of his shoulders, the cord of his neck, and he chuckles, squeezing his waist as she climbs into his lap again, sits squarely so that his erection rubs against her stomach. He bites back a groan and her smirk tells him all he needs to know.

“Seeing as you didn’t let me finish…” he trails off, just as humorous and she laughs, mouth ghosting his, and he almost reaches for it before she’s drawing back, always just out of reach. Never his. Never. “C’mere.”

“You’re no fun,” she mutters, but her smile betrays her faux displeasure and as his hands down and under her dress, skirting along the waistband of lacey panties, he chuckles huskily. “I love you, you know that?”

“I know. And do you know how much I want you? How much… how much I need you?” His fingers hook on the waistband and begin to tug just as she cups his face and leans down. His eyes flutter shut and everything seems to melt away as her breath tickles his nose and he grins, pulling down, down, down…

“You could show me, if you’d like…”

Her laughter is the only thing he can hear. Well, that and…

And that ringing—

Holy shit, what is that ringing?

Opening his eyes, there is nothing. Reaching blindly in the darkness, his hand collides with his alarm clock and he slaps the button, turning it off as he groans, turning the digital numbers towards him.

5:45AM

When did he get back? God, his head is pounding, and… he has to get up. Shit. His thoughts are a disorganized mess as he gets up, throwing off the blankets and it’s only then he’s painfully aware that he got… more than excited about his dream.

His dream that’s fading from his memory the longer he’s awake that he can barely remember any of it. Iit was at the bar last night? When did he even get back to the dorm? 

Swinging his legs off the bed, he flicks the light on the nightstand, spotting a glass of water with a dissolving alka selzter tablet and a note. Grabbing it, he squints against the light as he reads the messy, uneven scrawl.

Stayed by your side all night because you sulked and got hammered. Like blackout drunk. Even outdrank me, buddy, which is fuckin impressive.

Wake me up for breakfast. I’m drunk.

Goodnight. And you’re welcome.

-E

Shaking his head, he downs the water despite how much his head throbs at the movement before he gets up and awkwardly palms the front of his boxers, trying to ignore how much it physically hurts that he’s not doing anything about it.

He needs to shower and take care of this.

Grabbing new clothes, Aaron glances at his snoring roommate and curses his routine of waking up so damn early. He collects his toiletries, and as he heads for the shower, he tries to think back on his dream, but it’s dissipating quicker by the second.

It was definitely at the bar, he thinks. Something about… he doesn’t know but something smelled and tasted sweet. What was I even doing at the bar?

Well, by the erection against his thigh, it’s safe to assume what he was dreaming about.

The question is more about the who.

.

Your eyes fly open and you lurch up on your bed.

Your whole body is burning as the remaining wisps of your dream begin to fade and you glance around yourself, disoriented. You could’ve sworn you weren’t in your bedroom for a second, but as you glance around, you know you are. You’re no longer in that dark place with blue lights that swung, figures blurry. That someone who was crouched in front of you, you think, is gone and his hands which had pulled your legs apart with gentle hesitation hadn’t left scorch marks, but they might as well have.

The sensation still lingers.

God, it feels like you haven’t slept a wink and as you slowly wake, your body rebooting, you become more filled with dread. Sighing heavily, you rub at your eyes and touch your cheeks, trying to remember what you did before sleeping.

I showered, went straight to bed. Didn’t go out… then… What’s happening? What was I even dreaming about?

It’s only then you become acutely aware of between your legs. The soaked, uncomfortable sensation, the strange tightness of your thighs.

Holy fuck. And about who?

Running a hand over the cold sheets, you shiver and get up, grabbing the unopened complimentary mini bottle of water you’d gotten from the plane from your bag.

As soon as you take one sip, you’re chugging it down, trying to alleviate the sweat gathering at the nape of your neck, slipping down your back. You feel oily and strangely empty, your heart racing as you toss the empty plastic into the trash can and head back towards the bed, reaching blindly for the light switch. Turning it on, you glance at the clock. 5:47 in the morning.

Charming.

In less than five hours, you’ll have to be heading down to the lobby and facing your best friend.

Why does that thought suddenly fill you with a terrible concoction of nerves, nausea, and cold shivers?

Trying to grasp the last remnants of your dream, you head for the bathroom to splash some water on your face and change your underwear, too bone-dead tired to even think about showering. Then, you head back to bed to try to get some sleep, but the heat seems to be more than skin-deep because despite the amount of splashing and patting of freezing water against an exhausted face, a terrible, sinking feeling twists your gut, making your knees weak.

What on Earth were you even dreaming about? You can’t even remember now except you feel utterly exhausted in the wake of it and the only hint of the content is the slick between your thighs.

Your sleep-addled brain eventually convinces any part of you still awake to just try to sleep, and as you slip into the covers, the faint but entirely unique scent of cologne, beer and smoke clings to your senses.

[THE PRESENT]

Really, it should be okay. 

The hotel isn’t too sketchy, the lobby smells vaguely of lavender and cinnamon from one of those bath shop candles, and he shouldn’t be worried.

Why is he worried? His guts have been in knots since he’s woken up, his head feels like it's been dunked in water for hours and everything is swimming as he sits in the lobby, his palms sweating. Maybe it’s the hangover, but it feels heavier than that. Yes, his head is hammering, but there’s a strange upset in his gut, too.

Must’ve been something about that dream he can’t quite place. Just thinking about it makes his head beat even harder.

But, you had said ten o’clock.

Ten o’clock.

He looks at his wrist watch.

9:57

Time seems to be passing so slowly that he’s not sure the seconds even tick by as his knee begins to jiggle, his hands run flat against his jeans. When he can’t take the nervous ticking inside his chest, he gets up to pace, eyes darting to the staircase where you’d be coming down from.

Is he nervous about seeing you or excited? Is it both? Neither? Something else?

Aaron thinks he’s going to throw up. What if it’s awkward? After all, years between the last visit and now—in the summer, somehow they always just miss each other or there’s money problems or some other plan—things are bound to change.

It’s nerves. It has to be.

The door opens and he turns around to see you there, walking over to him with a dark jacket over a green shirt. It clashes wonderfully and you’re smiling like the sun lives in your heart and you’re smiling at him.

“What’s the deal with the jacket, George?” you tease, gesturing to his leather jacket.

“George?” he repeats easily, too easily. An overwhelming flood in his chest and you arch an eyebrow, grinning still, and it’s like no time has passed at all. “And here I thought I was John.” Your smile only grows and he feels like he can’t breathe and that’s when he knows he’s fucked.

As you adjust your own jacket, compliment him on his, and ask where he wants to go for breakfast, Aaron can’t help the terrible ache in his chest.

Shit. Shit. Shit. Shit.

Shit.

He opens the door and you walk by, the smell of shampoo invading his entire space and he reels back, blinking. His breath hitches, his entire body stiffens.

Warm vanilla spice.

Oh, shit.

a/n: so, uh, sex dreams for the win? to be decided ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) dont forget to reblog if u liked loves ❤️ 

TAGS: @withyoutilltheendofthismess @thebriarpatch @joemazzello-imagines @thisiscalm-andits-doctor @sera-wonderland @pity-mee @duvetsandpillows @roses-and-grasses @stainedpomegranatelips @angelsbabey @sansonnette @xxlovingfandomsxx @rachelxwayne @kingandrear @simsvetements @emery--nicole--morrison​ @genevievedarcygranger @mooneylupinblack​ @sercyan​ @forgottenword

[hugthepanda12]

Bobo rant

Ok, @narvana27 this one’s for you coz I’ve mustered up some motivation to finally write some analyses just like you or @medeaminte​

This one will cover our beautiful Brazillian boy Raimundo Pedrosa. Some spoilers are inevitable to mention, but the main focus is on the episode titled ‘The Return of Master Monk Guan’.

1.1 short synopsis of the episode:

Master Fung, seeing how the forces of evil grew in power, decides to send monks to another temple for their training. It turns out the new master that is destined to teach them is Master Monk Guan. 

As for his methods, they are surprisingly cruel. Our heroes are not allowed to take breaks or even ASK QUESTIONS! Guan becomes that horrible general in military school who likes when cadets are blindly following his orders and train to the point they collapse due to severe exhaustion. 

Rai, of course, sees that the way Guan treats his students is unfair and stands up for the rest. Which ends up bad for him. Guan punishes him with additional training and what is worse humiliates him through giving him insulting nicknames! Later on, the audience learns that this disrespectful behaviour of Master Guan was intentional. What is more, Raimundo knows about it as well. It was a part of the agreement between them, reached off screen without the knowledge of the other monks. The main goal of such a strategy was to lure Hannibal Roy Bean out of his hiding, let him believe Rai is ready to turn to the Heylin side (again) and snatch the Treasure of the Blind Swordsman from his little evil vines. 

As the episode reaches its end, this plan as well ends in success. Bean is mad as hell and promises Raimundo that he’ll pay for it. Yeah, yeah happy ending. Cool. Rai gets one of the Spears of Guan as a gift for a succesfull colaboration with Master Monk Guan bla blah 

BUT!

Even if it was all the play on Guan and Rai’s part throughout the whole episode, in my opionion Guan was too harsh anyway. I get it. He had to be plausible, but man... Rai literally cried when he banished him from the temple!  

And this is an issue I wanted to talk about. 

1.2. Let’s look at all ‘nicknames’ Guan came up with for Raimundo. 

1. Young prince 2. bobo

3. someone dark, ruthless, shady, rebelious

I WANT TO PROVE RAI. IS. NOT. ANY OF THESE. 

1.2.1.The insult ‘young prince’ (or princess) is often used when a young person is too lazy to finish chores or he/she is not willing to do them at all. Maybe it was Raimundo in s01, although he had never said ‘no’ to master Fung. He just wanted to go easy way, like swiping the dirt under the sofa instead of getting rid of it in a proper way. But mind you, it is season 3 and this boy has changed a lot. Sometimes you don’t have to work hard to get your task done. All it takes is an adequate situation assessment and good organisation of your work.

 It looks as if Guan just doesn’t get it. Just like how vital breaks are in order to rise productivity. 

Rai made a right decision to stop training and lay on the grass. He knows what’s good for him and he stands by this intention to REST. Life is not ALWAYS about saving the world. He’s just a kid. Just like Omi, Kimiko or Clay. He’s defending his boundaries, but it appears no one’s respecting that choice. 

1.2.2. What about Bobo? Up to this day I thought that Guan wanted to underline that Rai acts like a clown, so he gave him a clown name. However, I came across this site. And guess. Bobo in Portuguese means ‘silly.’

And my question is: Did Guan know? Hmm!? Did you know about it, Guan? If yes, I’m very disappointed in you. ‘Silly little clown boy’ - this is what Rai is? No, it’s not like he was the only one brave enough to fight Mala Mala Jong... or EVEN OMI when he turned heylin!

It’s not like he has feelings or something... He’s the fun guy! Always chill! Not allowed to cry! His purpose is to entertain the rest, righ?

NO. Rai is not only a capable warrior but also a very dedicated friend, who can sacrifice ANYTHING in order to save the rest. Let’s ennumerate how many people he saved throughout the series. People who live near the vulcano in Brazil, that Lady who turned out to be the Bird of Paradise.... OMI. The rest of his team a couple of times... 

And what is more, every encounter TAUGHT HIM SOMETHING or had left some scars. He was possessed by Wuya, got beat up, and constantly he is accused of having EVIL TENDENCIES. What? Because ONE TIME he betrayed them? And that betrayal was justified because he felt hella ineadequate? 

But yeah, Guan. Go on. He is just silly to get all the punches for the team. It’s not like he isn’t bothered when the forces of evil are victorious.

Not at all. 

1.2.3. Ok, I agree Rai is rebelious, but as I mentioned earlier - HE HAS REASONS to be that way. He feels something is wrong - he exclaims why this is wrong and tries to FIX IT with the help or without it. The thing is, in s1-2 prefers facing problems alone due to that inadequacy he’s often reminded of by his peers. It’s sad to see that monks never realised Raimundo feels that way. Luckily, in season 3 Rai grew as a character. He displays more and more leader characteristics. He comes up with better strategy and is ore connected to his friends. As a result their cooperation during fights is on a higher level, just like in the last showdown in that alternate timeline. 

DARK, RUTHLESS, SHADY. - those are lies and I won’t comment on that

He can be ruthless only if someone hurts his family and friends. They’re gonna pay for that. Respect Rai for that. 

2. My opinion on  ‘ The Return of Master Monk Guan’

2.1. Guan’s behaviour - this post is about it. Just wanted to add he is very inconsistent as a character and writers probably had no idea how to write him so they just randomly threw him to some plot points in order to give episodes smooth flow between scenes. 

But yeah in that particular ep Guan is a jerk. First kidnapping Dojo, then overworking children only to kick out the most responsible one outta his temple with numerous sculptures of him, Dashi and replicas of his fav spear.

2.2 Monks’ behaviour - wanted to help, turned out bad. Omi as always was questioning Rai’s value and laughed at him bc of his new nicknames. Very mature of the chosen one, really. 

2.3 My review

This episode was good because:

1. It's rai-centered

2. He put to use that clever brain of his and gave master Guan the idea how to retrieve the most powerful wu from Bean

3. He can KICK ASS, only refuses to use that against his friends. 4. good preparation for cheeseball to reconsider he's NOT ALWAYS THE BEST and should be aware of Raimundo's skills

2.4. Summary

Raimundo Pedrosa has one of the best character developments in animation history but most importantly he is the complete opposite of those things the other characters tell him he is. He learns from his mistakes and utilises the knowledge for his benefit to protect what he believes is right. He’s very compassionate young man, who can do great things and he WILL with guidance of his temple family.

But most importantly, he well deserved the position of the Xiaolin Leader. His name is not Bobo. Only Raimundo Pedrosa. Good friend, leader, warrior, the future hope for making the world a better place.