#maybe i cant change the past but i sure as hell can live in it forever
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[read on ao3]
"You okay?"
Lydia has her elbows on her knees. Sitting in the waiting room of Deaton's clinic, her blue dress paradoxically bright against the bland color palette of the room, she's a contradiction unto herself. She looks tired and shaken. She looks glad to be alive. She looks unprepared to believe that being alive is going to last.
"I've been worse," is how she answers him. Then, "I've also been better."
Stiles takes the empty seat beside her.
"Feels like we're always hovering in the middle there," he offers.
Lydia nods. "Ethan and Aiden are going to be okay."
"Thank God," Stiles deadpans. "I would have been heartbroken to lose them.”
Lydia gently shoves him. "They did the right thing in the end. They're not that bad."
Stiles only hums, drumming on his knee with restless fingers. A deafening silence crowds them in. Stiles reflects on the events of the last twenty-four hours and finds them alarming when compressed into such a small time frame.
"What's on your mind?" he dares to ask, after the quiet is almost insurmountably heavy. If Deaton is still in the exam room with the twins, they're being very quiet. Suspiciously so. Something for Stiles to check on, once he's done checking on Lydia.
Lydia who is smoothing out her dress with a persistence that could be called obsessive. Every motion creates a new wrinkle, and every time, Lydia flattens it under her thumb.
"Oh, you know." Her tone is light, but her twisting fingers betray just how uneasy she is. "Thinking about how the last time I was sitting in this waiting room, you were dead for sixteen hours."
Stiles takes that one to the solar plexus, though he's not sure how else it could be taken.
"I wasn't…really dead. It was more like a long sleep. A long, icy sleep."
"You stopped breathing." Lydia stares lasers into her knees. "You didn't have a heartbeat. Deaton kept saying it was okay, that this was normal, that if something was really wrong we would know, but he was lying, I could tell. He wouldn't let us near you guys — he said he didn't want us interfering with the process." A fist forms in her lap, creasing the folds of her dress. "Sixteen hours. I didn't eat, I didn't sleep. I just sat here. Waiting. Hoping Deaton wasn't full of shit."
"And he wasn't," Stiles says, morbidly upbeat. "We came back!"
"You don't get it," Lydia says, sounding angry and scared and deeply wounded all at the same time.
Stiles frowns. If she would just look at him, maybe he could read her expression, but he can't tell what she's thinking from the set of her shoulders. "So help me get it."
Lydia breathes out, out, out, expelling air like it's a toxic gas.
"Humans have a reflex," she says in a small voice, staring through her palms. "It prevents them from drowning until the last possible second. The survival instinct is so powerful that it overpowers the breathing instinct, even when holding your breath becomes excruciatingly painful. It's called—”
"Voluntary apnea," Stiles says dumbly.
Lydia looks up at him and nods once. Her green eyes latch onto his.
"You told me once that death happens to the people around you," she says, biting her lip. "I can't imagine how it must have felt to be in that ice bath…but can you imagine how it felt to be the one holding you down?"
Stiles is too dumbstruck to answer.
"I killed you. I did that. It doesn't matter that it was temporary. I didn't know that, we didn't know that for sure. I held you in that water until you died, Stiles." Her hands tremble. "You were dead for sixteen hours because of me. I was a murderer. For sixteen hours."
"Whoa whoa whoa, hey," Stiles says. His 'Protect Lydia Martin' instinct is back online and the alarm is blaring. He grabs her hands in both of his, keeping them still and warm.
"Okay, first of all, you didn't murder me. It was consensual drowning! If anything it was more like assisted suicide." Lydia glares. "Not helping. Right. Sorry. Um, but secondly, and— and way more importantly, Lydia, yeah, maybe you temporarily killed me, but you also— you brought me back to life."
She’s unmoved, he can tell, so he shakes her gently. "Yeah. You did that. Look, anyone can kill me. I'm not even six feet of fragile bones and zero muscle mass, and my best friend's a freakin' werewolf, okay, killing me is not impressive. Bringing me back? That takes something else. Something special, and only someone who—" He tries not to stammer but his tongue sabotages him, "who cares about me enough to bring me back to life could do that, and honestly, those are in short supply, so yeah. Maybe you were a temporary murderer, but you were also a savior. My savior." He smiles weakly. "And I wouldn't have it any other way."
Lydia holds his gaze. She holds his hands, too — not passively but decisively, clutching them like a lifeline, like she's the one who's drowning. Reflecting once again on the past twenty-four hours, it occurs to Stiles that he is not the only person for whom that stretch of time has been alarming.
"That's certainly a nicer way of looking at it," she yields softly. Then she shakes her head. "But it doesn't change the fact that in order to save you, I had to kill you." Now she weaponizes that arresting stare, seaglass green pinning him to his seat. "I'm never doing that again, you understand? I can't."
"I wouldn't ask you to."
"You don't know what it was like," she murmurs — seemingly talking to herself now, more than him, anyway. "Watching you. And I couldn't do anything. I couldn't do anything but sit there."
Something niggles Stiles's brain, that feeling he gets when a few different threads braid themselves into a discernible pattern. The emotional tether. Lydia's remorse. Sixteen hours of sitting and waiting.
"Sitting there was exactly what you were supposed to do," he realizes, also half to himself. It gets her attention anyway; she frowns at his conclusion. Stiles goes on: "An emotional tether, Deaton said, someone to bring us back, I didn't really get it, how that could work, but you just said it. You all just sat there. For sixteen hours. You waited. You stayed, so I had someone to come back to. The way only a tether could do. Think about it, right? If a fisherman casts a line and then walks away from the fishing pole, it doesn't matter whether he hooks a fish because no one is there to reel it in."
"Are you comparing yourself to a fish?"
"We were underwater, I was thinking about water, it was the first metaphor that came to mind, give me a break,” Stiles says defensively. "My point is, sixteen hours is a long time. Long enough to get bored, to lose faith, to give up and walk away and pronounce us dead. But you guys didn't. You didn't."
"Deaton said—”
"You just told me you thought Deaton was full of shit. But you stayed anyway, right?" Stiles presses, looking Lydia in the eye. "You had a feeling. Or maybe you just believed. Whatever it was, you stayed. That's how you brought me back. You thought you weren't doing anything, but you were doing the most important thing." He squeezes her hands. "You were waiting for me."
#lydia martin#stiles stilinski#stydia#stydia fic#teen wolf#teen wolf fic#fic#my fic#tw#tw fic#this fic contains spoilers for season 3a of teen wolf in case any newcomers happen upon it#boy i am a one trick pony and the trick is writing season 3 stydia fic huh#look. you fuck around with me and you sure as hell find out#and what you find out is that mentally i am still in season 3 with the specific stydia dynamic created therein#and i have not left and i will never leave#maybe i cant change the past but i sure as hell can live in it forever#so anyway i really gotta go the fuck to sleep cuz it is a whole entire 1am#and i have like. stuff tomorrow i think. like i gotta pack and stuff. which won't take long god willing#but does still need to happen#stuff
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Regret is finally catching up to you?
Summery: Megatron finds himself in the same flower field. Soon a distorted Starscream and Optimus show up to mock him.
Characters: Megatron, Starscream, Optimus
Trigger warning: Past abuse
Megatron stared into the distance of the blue field. Admitting defeat, he decided he did not deserve his name. His shame and guilt bubbling up in him. All the lives he took, all the screams, it was all on him. Know one to hit or blame. No one to mock. No one was there except him.
Megatron heard a distant laugh. “This is pitiful! The great Megatron finally has regrets!” Megatron looked in horror at a distorted red Starscream. He looked almost scratchy. “How does it feel Megatron. How does it feel to have every little mistake beat you alive?” Starscream mocked him. Usually he would threaten Starscream, or throw him. But not this time. This time he was getting the beating.
“Nothing to say?” His distorted voice held confusion. “I’m surprised Megatron.” Starscream pulled Megatrons face to look at him. “It seems like you really have changed.” Megatron grinned at the praise.
“Or maybe not.” Megatron jumped at the noise of a familiar voice. “Maybe he just forces himself to act like this. After all, he’s Megatron. He’s incapable or change!” He looked behind him, only to be met with another distorted figure. A figure all too familiar. Optimus Prime.
“It’s your old friend Megatron!” Starscream said excitedly, tho Megatron doubted that Starscream was happy. “No, an old enemy. As he sees it, I am nothing but a headache, a flea, a dog to be kicked around.” Optimus tiled his head. He wasn’t wrong though. Optimus has always been an obstacle for Megatron even before he became Prime.
“I pity you Megatron. After all the bloodshed, all those lost, all those abused, betrayed, and abandoned by you, you feel sorrow for yourself.” He held Megatrons chin to at to the embarrassment. “I see now!” Starscream laughed. “Your road of self discovery was just a self-pity circus!” They both laughed. Megatron frowned. This humiliation wasn’t acceptable. He’s paid his depts in jail. He felt his rage bubble up against the shame and guilt. The verbal beating was far from over though.
“Truly after all he’s done to us the least he can do is say sorry!” Starscream and Optimus were basically attached to each other by this point. “Surely after everything he’s done to make himself better, his spark had a little empathy left for us!” Optimus had said with a chuckle. “Go ahead Megatron. Apologize.” Starscream beamed while saying that small sentence. It made Megatron sick to his stomach. He couldn’t just take this anymore. His rage now clouded him. Of course he wouldn’t take it out on them. He will admit this: he put both of them through hell. Instead of actually beating them. He will take the approach that they have been taking.
“For what.” He grinned. “From what I can tell everything I’ve done to hurt you is deserved.” What? Why did he say that? He regrets what he has done. He’s seen the era of his ways. Why did that slip out?!
They both went quiet. Their distorted red bodies stared at him. He felt the air cool. He saw the light disappear from the sky. And he heard nothing. Not the strangely scribbling red figure talking their mouths off, not the cooling wind, not any footsteps. Nothing.
“FOR WHAT?!” The Starscream figure lived up to his name. He screamed and he screamed loudly “YOURE GUILT AND SELF-PITY DOES NOT MAKE YOU A SAINT.” The figure grew larger. “YOU TREATED US LIKE DOGS. WE HAD COLLARS ON WHILE YOU TUGGED ON OUR LEASHES MAKING US CHOKE. YOU THREW US. BEAT US. AND MADE US WEAKEN IN YOUR PRESENCE!” “YOU RUINED US! EVERYTHING WENT IN TO RUINS WHEN YOU SHOWED UP. WE CANT COUNT HOW MANY TIMES WE STOOD UP FOR YOU, JUST FOR YOU TO TREAT US LIKE ANIMALS IN YOUR WICKED CARE!” Starscream barked.
Megatron stared them down. “ALL THE BEATINGS ALL THE HUMILIATION YOU CAUSED ME!” Starscream yelled “I WAS UNDER YOUR HEEL! I WAS STUCK WITH YOU.” Starscream reached out to choke him. “YOU DESERVE YOUR PAIN. NOT US!” Megatron didn’t say anything.
“SPEAK YOU FOOL!” His figure seemed more still in its own rage. Starscream only glared at him. It seems he had also lost his words.
Megatron saw Optimus in the corner of his Optics. He was curled up into a ball. He refused to face him. Megatron walked through Starscream like a cloud.
“Optimus.” Megatron sat down by him. “Did I hurt you?”
“Yes.” He responded quickly.
“Are you angry with me?”
“…” he didn’t respond as fast. “Yes. You anger me. All I’ve done is try to help you change. In the process you made me change in a more hardened, painful process.”
Megatron nodded. “You hate me then?” He asked confidently. “… I don’t know.”
“Well how do you not know? You seem pretty confident at being angry with me.” Optimus paused. “I feel like I should hate you. I have every reason too.” “Agreed.”
Optimus turned to face Megatron. “You… want me to hate you?” He seem confused. “No. You just made it clear today that you have reasons to hate me. You have a million of them. But you don’t. That’s why I don’t understand you Optimus, you want any relationship you can have with somebody. Even if they hurt you.” Megatron met Optimus’ optics.
Optimus seemed to be in awe that Megatron noticed that about him. Something that made all perfect sense.
“You know, I have reasons to hate you too.” Optimus tilted his head. “Both of you.” He turned around to get a quick glance at Starscream, who was still glaring at Megatron.
“But I don’t. I don’t hate either of you.” Optimus looked at him in awe “Why?! You have reasons!” Optimus asked ruefully.
“Simple, the same reason why you don’t hate me.” Optimus turned to look at him again, this time less disapproving. “Okay not exactly the same. But similar non the less!” He admitted “I don’t know why I can’t hate you.” Optimus didn’t say anything back. All they did was sit, in complete silence.
Optimus’ red figure cooled down into a cool purple. “I’m sorry.” Megatron smiled warmly. “No need to be Optimus. I don’t need it. I feel sorry for myself as it is.”
Optimus sketch figure became more defined, more real. “Megatron.” Optimus jump into a hug. Megatron wasn’t surprised. He accepted the hug willingly.
“Optimus.” He paused “I’m so sorry.” Optimus deepened the hug. Snuggling his head on Megatrons shoulder. “Wake up.” He whispered in Megatrons ear as he broke the hug and let the flowers take him. Megatron watched as his mortal enemy, a person who he’s supposed to hate, fade away into the ground happily. It made him smile.
He stood up to face Starscream. The mech he has hurt the most. The mech who seems to be his #1 hater. “I will not apologize to you Megatron.” Starscream admitted with zero shame. “I refuse to.”
“I’m not asking you too.” Megatron said proudly. For a few minutes they just stood there. Staring at each other. “But I will apologize. I’m sorry Starscream.”
He laughed. “You really have changed.” Megatron didn’t grin, smile or join Starscreams unneeded laughing. “But there is so much that hasn’t changed. You may be different, but you’re still the same old Megatron under all those new morals.”
“Maybe. Or maybe I’m still on the path of change. Maybe I’m still changing.” Megatron softly smiled. “You’ll wake up soon.” Starscream added. “I know.”
──
Megatron woke up in a peaceful sweat.
“That was a weird dream… I think I need to talk to Rung about it.” He said groaning.
He thought about Optimus and Starscream. How he hurt them. How they hurt him. How they all can’t manage to hate each other.
“I’m sorry.”
- OKAY ASTER HERE!!! This is a simple one shot based off an art work I saw on Twitter. I would prefer if people rebloged this more then like it so it can be seen by more people. DO NOT POST ANYWHERE ELSE PLS.
#fake angel#optimus prime#megatron#starscream#transformers idw#:33333#do not repost#do not steal#my fanfiction#fanfic#writers on tumblr#transformers#idw optimus prime#idw megatron#idw starscream
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“Everything Comes Back To You”
Steve Harrington x Reader
Steve Harrington angst
“I don’t want us to end but it’s the only way Steve your still in love with her, I can’t keep being the second option” i said tears starting to fall out my eyes.
Steve gripped my face with his hand whipping away the tear. “I’m sorry for making you feel that way I don’t want us to end, please baby….”
“Steve we cant..” i pushed his hand away and got out of the car.
~~~~~
That had been 6 months ago and I haven’t seen him much since that night. Besides when we would hang out with the kids or at work but I made sure to change my shifts to avoid seeing him.
He had tried to talk to me multiple times but I didn’t wanna hear it I was tired.
I’ve missed him so much to be honest but I couldn’t get my self to getting my heart broken again. I had seen the way he looked at her like she was his whole life. He had told me they were just friends but friends don’t look at friends that way.
~~~~~
Now the whole situation with Vecna was happening and we were all on guard all scared for our lives and Max we didn’t know was was gonna happen to our red head best friend.
We were now investigating the creel house for clues when I noticed Steve and Nancy talking. Of course they were talking no surprise there. I rolled my eyes and kept looking around.
Robin walked in and noticed my annoyed look.
“You know he still love you right, I mean your all he ever talks about.” She stated
“Yea and that’s why he’s over there with the girl whose the reason why this all started”
“Y/N there friends, friends talk.” She pleaded
“I honestly don’t care anymore im tired of him and his stupid games” I then walked away and made my way over to Munson who said he had found something. He put his hand around my shoulder and pulled me closer to him showing me his new discovery.
Not noticing Steve making his way over with an angry expression on his face.
“Hands off Munson she doesn’t need your germs.” Steve argued
“Relax I was just showing her something that I thought might be important, geez.” He rolled his eyes and walked away
“Munson really you couldn’t do better than that??” He argued
“Fuck you Steve what I do and who I like is none your business” i didn’t even like Eddie but that wasn’t any of his business not any more
“Why don’t you go back to Nancy and leave me alone” i said starting to walk away
“ so that’s what this is about really Nancy.” Is he really doing this right now when everyone can hear us.
“No Steve were broken up I don’t care about you and your little girlfriend.” I rolled my eyes tired of this conversation fuck him.
“Can we talk like seriously talk.” He said
“Steve we’re trying to save our friend it isn’t time for our live life situation.” I said
“It’s exactly the time I need to tell you this incase one of us don’t make it past this”
“Don’t say that we’re gonna be fine. I’ll make sure of it” no way in hell was I gonna let him die.
~~~~~~
“Y/N Can we please talk?” He stated from his seat in the car.
“There isn’t anything for us to talk about Steve.” I sighed
“Please” he begged I couldn’t say no to hm not when he sounded this broken
“I love you more than anything, loosing you I don’t know how much longer I can deal with it, I love you not her I know that now,”
“Why now? Why couldn’t you say that to me six months ago steve?” I asked
“ b-b- because I didn’t know, I thought maybe part of me was still In love with her but it isn’t y/n every single part of me belongs to you no one else.”
“So why were you all lovey dovey with her today hm?” I rolled my eyes
“Because Y/N i WAS asking her how to talk to you about this and she was helping me. and for the millionth fucking time I’m not fucking in love with her I’m in love you with you are the only person I’m in love with baby you only you.”
“I’m scared Steve I’m scared to give my heart to you again I’ve missed you so much Steve but I’m scared.” I cried a tear falling out of my eye he leaned in whipped it away he then pressed his forehead to mine
“ I promise to never hurt you again just please forgive me. Do you still love me?” He pleaded
“Of course I do. I don’t think I ever stopped.” I then leaned in to kiss him him pressing our lips together when we hear
“FINALLY I KNEW IT WAS GONNA HAPPEN MIKE YOU OWE ME TEN BUCKS!” Yelled Dustin I laughed breaking away the kiss he grabbed my thigh and rubbed on it
“Never leave me for this long again.”
#steve harrington#steve harrington smut#stranger things#stranger things 4#steve harrington angst#steve harrington imagine#imagine#steve harrington fluff
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yes this is the dante theory list for those who liked this post but im also making it my pinned
First; Hi, I'm Md (they/it/she) and welcome to my autism hole. Boops you. HERE is my art blog, HERE is my eldritch sideblog, HERE is my berserkerlot sideblog, and HERE is my photoblog, HERE is my AO3, HERE is my Flight Rising, HERE is my BlueSky. Okay, now back to the actual post. Limbus FC is C092709920.
Md's hot hot list of Dante limbus theories that I've been sitting on since I started playing
ONE OF THESE WILL BE RIGHT. MAYBE. cut for length. discuss in the comments. contains ruina and lobocorp spoilers. maybe even leviathan spoilers. assume spoilers for the newest content. pinning so i can keep adding to it in the future. (edited 10/21) (up to TKT)
Theory 58, pushed up bc it has potential, 7/7- Dante's name is Da'at or something similar. it's a hidden sephirot. iIT'S NUMBER 10. WAIT THIS FUCKS TO THE TOP OF THE LIST THIS GOES.
Theory 1, from early march 2023- Dante has the option to get their head back, takes it. Human Dante is shown. except clearly hiding unfamiliarity with the sinners. The clock head is still alive. A clock doesnt need a body to live. Human evil dante uses the golden whatever to cause Problems and has the sinners chained to them. vergil is free tho so he can beat down evil dante. (this now works with a canto 5 tidbit where vergil said he'd only step in if "all sinners dead, dante is beaten, and the hands of the clock are about to be torn off".)
T2, 3/12- 9 circles of hell, Dante, and a few subsections. Dante is sinner 10. Charon is also in the divine comedy so she'll get a section. Dante are u lucifer. who is the lucifer of the setting?? i'm saying pre-dante Dante until otherwise noted. (not personally fond of this one)
T3, 3/15- iori saw limbus going a certain way and guaranteed it by making sure Dante got factory reset by force. villain to cause heroism. (dont know enough about Iori for this one)
**T4- Backwards clock relation possible. (possibly canon validated) (even more possible connection as of 6.3)
T5- Saying Dante had a significant other named Beatrice is way too low bar but It's a necessary one. ech
T6- Dante IS Beatrice and given the name of someone else. (too ez)
T7, 3/17- future Dante guaranteeing the future changes by getting past Dante's head removed. issue solved. This one is based on the opening and reading the lyrics real goodly.
T8, 3/20- Dante's head has a lil bit of angelas ai in there. or ayin data. benjamin. any of them. carmen even. fuck whatever. maybe hokma bc ticking in ruina theme. (this one lead to some Better Ideas. see later) (4/7) POSSIBLY SUPPORTED BY 6.2. WHY DID THEY SEE THAT.
T9, 3/23- The three censored letters. B E A, S I N, E G O, A L I, who knows. v e r. could be anything this one is nothing
T10, 3/26- Faust VERY SPECIFICALLY says that brains cant be replaced-- so even if Dante gets their head back, it's incompatible now. (!! this is a Top Theory)
T11, 3/28- Beatrice or someone else died around Christmas, which makes Dante sad even without their memories. The pain exists but the context is missing. (They also seem to know Christmas music without any issue, able to sing along with Charon in their head. This is not addressed in canon.)
T12, 3/30- Beatrice was one of the orphans that died in Leviathan :) the time period matches up. It was around Christmas.
T13, 3/31- HARD LOBOCORP SPOILER. Thinking about In Hell We Live (Lament). "Each loop we live/die thru"? How many times? How many times has Dante done this? Or Pre-Dante, anyway. Faust is probably in on it. The new L corp took one look at what Ayin was doing and went "we can do that too lmao". Losing their memory was a base requirement to prevent madness. I rewrote this theory on 9/19 but added "to prevent a paradox"
T14, 4/18- Less a HC and more a suggestion, just use F Corp's shit to Unlock Dante's memory. If we ever visit District F, you KNOW Faust is gonna keep them on one hell of a tight leash.
T15- Is the Star a Singularity? Did Dante STEAL it? Are THEY the singularity? The clock? This one's too easy too though.
T16, 5/8- WAT IF THE STAR IS LUCIFER. MORNING STAR. CAN MANIPULATE SOULS IN HELL. (weak but proj moon loves their Christian imagery. this will come back repeatedly) not this one. maybe
T17, 5/10- Dante is either connected to whitenight OR a jesus figure (12 apostles, sin, not dying when killed, revives people, etc. the christianity again. it will continue. i already drew plague doc dante.) (4/7, possible but carmen is the lucifer adjacent if 6-34 is anything to go by. jesus is still open.)
**T18. 5/16- Dante's clock hands are made from a Golden Bough. ez. LETS FUCKING GOOOOOOOOOOO canto 5.2
T19. 6/16- This has 0 canon basis but what if Dante was a Bloodfiend, would that be cool or what? They already don't need to eat, but is that from the clock or something else? Do they get IVs with nutrients? How does this work? Idk. I just want Dante to cut their hand open, make giant claws and rip a man apart before eating dirt. Dante can chew on a Sinner as a treat. c: I just want this one.
T20- Wouldn't it be fucked up if Dante found their head and it had either Distorted or was an Abnormality??
T21, 9/29- Religious Bastard Dieci Dante Aligheri.
T22- Dante has gotten Very Attached to the Sinners as their only form of contact while they've gotten themselves together. They recently realized many Sinners are doing this for the end goals, not to be a team. This seemed to upset them. UPSET THEM MORE. DISTORT THEM. DANTE REALIZES THEY'LL ALL LEAVE WITHOUT A CARE IN THE WORLD. Carmen! Come get this bitch.
T23- Actually, Dante should distort for any reason. I Absolutely Understand the Mechanics (lying). Got too depressed, hit -45 SAN and decided they're just a useless tool instead of a person? Absolutely. You're now a piece of equipment. (when Heath asks if they're okay in canto 5 bc they got injured, dante responds "the clocks fine so who cares?") (I now understand the mechanics but want it anyway) They won't.
T24- Building off the previous, they're really starting to believe they're just a tool like how Gregor thinks he's a bug. That Is Not Good For Your Mental Health (garry ib icon.png)
T25- Putting this here just before my fav one, their skin. We never see it, so a list of potential possibilities excluding Being White bc that's BORING: Any POC, ashy skin (like vergil), dark ashy (charon), pure black or close to (a lot of people do this, me included), dark and covered in stars, very tattooed, very mechanical, just outright a robot, bloodfiend again, scarred, frankensteiny, bough roots, fucked up censored, ETC. Based on the few images we have that show anything, it's just pitch black under there unless it's a skinsuit. the rest of them may be any of the above but for now most of these are defunct.
T26- My Current Top Theory of All Time- Dante is an AI. They have never been human, just machine. At least one of their creators cared enough to do better than Ayin ever fucking did, fostering curiosity and a desire to live in the little AI. Thing is, after Angela, AI became Very Illegal. There's no way their creators survived. L Corp New got them. Old AI Dante was, at their core, still an unfeeling machine that made decisions based purely on cold logic. New Dante is a person that is learning and growing, refusing to follow the colder path at times.
Is the clock part of them? Unsure. That can work either way.
But they're definitely becoming a person who doesn't want every encounter to end in bloodshed and death. Good for them. (this part is correct)
T27- Dante is not Ruina Dante. they didn't get booked. I think they'd throw hands on sight.
T28- Verg/Dante that's all glory to yxxiville
**T29- Dante navigator skills IM SO FUCKING HAPPY I WIN FOREVER MOM HOLY FUCK
T30- I missed one! Their eyes with a human head. This has a few that rotate. Red eyes, Gold eyes, Gold with the star, heterochromia with only one gold/star and red, pitch black (pre-d), or night sky/star. mix and match. who cares?
T31- I personally like the idea of Dante being a redhead (real red not ginger like ish) but realize it doesn't make much sense. Black hair works too, esp smoky, but they need more color. maybe fire streaks? if POC, maybe dreads?
T32- I am now also accepting heathcliff/dante post canto 5.1 he care so much.... actually just sinner polycule is valid. so is sinner family. both work. the only part I dont like is dante/faust. doesn't feel right. Charon excluded. that is our child. sinner x any other sinner. dante x anyone. including vergil. not charon.
T33- Forgot an old one where I figured Dante was a hacker that got into a Lot of trouble and being sinner #10 was meant to be a suicide mission.
T34- Dante being an ai part 2, having been planted in a body. maybe even a body they knew.
T35- [added to 25]
T36- Memory loss being fully intentional to kill their previous self and only carry over the necessary. A new start.
T37- Yknow how we never SAW Dante being an upper torso and arm in canto 3? Why? What is being hidden that's so important? robot parts? are you a robot? are you a -
T38- Dante being an artist of any kind. musician, poet, painter, etc. even post amnesia. give em a hobby
T39- Somewhere else I discussed forms that'd be fun for a Dante Distortion but i cant find it so ill reiterate: coffin spider, all around helper clock, useless fucking thing. all of which have gold chains suffocating them and it doesnt fight back. give it morphine
T40- this one's insane but dante's og self being the Player/self-insert. thats why they were "Me" and not "Dante" we're not them. but we also are. (in tkt theres an npc names Mai so like. its close)
T41- This ones a joke but og dantes name actually just being "Me". (but not pronounced that way) (alternatively it was a nickname)
T42- Dante being an interviewer or reporter- A big name one. No wonder they keep secrets like K corps singularity. They can release that publicly later... if they choose to.
T43- RECREATE CARMEN. DO IT PUSSY. That 5.5 Blade scene is Damning as all hell. That or the bough + the monolith had an Interaction.
T44- Dante's internal programming knows the City Lore but Dante isn't allowed to know. The fact so much of that scene was censored...
T45- Dante is Bongbong
T46- I haven't beaten Ruina so I don't know a lot about Constructs or Librarians but like. Maybe they were one of those.
T47- Dante is going to eventually explode (figuratively). Even they can only take so much abuse and bullshit. Self-esteem can only go so low.
T48- Dante being a disaster chimera of stuff. AI made of someone else's brain, in someone else's body, with other stuff installed, etc, etc, etc.
T49- The Star reminds me too much of Blue Star, talking about Sin and such. Maybe it's an abno relating to that. who knows.
T50- Dante is an ID and there's a mirror in their head keeping them active. I hope they do a Charon/Lapis and totally overwrite the og bc the og's an asshole.
T51- Dante's the first successful "new human"
T52- Dante IS fucked up but something in their head hides the fuckedupness from everyone else.
T53- Dante is connected to that "ancient river".
T54- Dante was part of the 13th association.
T55- Dante stops keeping info to themselves so damn often. This is basically a bingo free space.
**T56- The Sinners are using Dante's time CONFIRMED jfc i JUST added this one too. and then tkt just confirms it like a minute later.
T57- Dante is a star. just straight up.
T58- Dante is Bari, suggested by @calmariah
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I found a 2009 german proshot of the count of monte cristo yesterday so i watched it for the first time and I liked it but it was so different from how I thought it would be. for context, the only songs i knew before watching it were a Story Told, Everyday a Little Death, Hell to Your Doorstep and This Man Is Dead
So i thought it was gonna be this upstanding good christian boy getting wrongfully convicted and thrown in jail (and i thought it was gonna be for greater political reasons but instead it was just literally to improve the lives of three random guys in some french town ig) and because his life is ruined after that, hes gonna go seek revenge and Im gonna be honest, i couldnt really figure out where Mercedes fits into all of this without actually watching the musical
But then i started watching and I was like "oh okay, so his wife is gonna be his character motivation initially but then he'll get more and more embittered by his imprisonment and once he gets out hes going to be like 'i still love my wife and i wanna see her again, but before that I need to kill those guys' leading to him becoming more and more corrupted until she doesnt love him anymore and then he kills himself bc he thinks he did all of that for her and life isnt worth living if she doesnt love him" and looked like i was completely right, like, it was gonna be a tragedy where Mercedes spent such a long time waiting for Edmond and hes been wanting to go back to her for so long but his need for revenge has such a strong grip on him and by the time they meet again theyve changed so thoroughly that they cant love each other in that beautiful way they used to
Like, since Mercedes ended up marrying one of the guys Edmond wanted to take revenge on, I thought we were gonna have a scene he murders him and Mercedes sees it but doesnt recognize Edmond bc its dark or hes covered in blood or something but Edmond recognizes her and then later when This Man is Dead (I Know Those Eyes) happens its basically Edmond being like "you say you love me bc you dont know what ive done, if you knew, you would never love me" but that wasnt really it, it was more about the trauma from being in prison changing him and I think he hadnt even done anything to any of those three guys at that point
And then he just like, gets better after seeing Mercedes again? Like, he realizes that revenge isnt the way (although Im pretty sure he'd already killed and/or ruined 2/3 of his victim trio by that point lmao) but then her husband comes in after he ruined his life and I thought, "oh, maybe instead of what I initially thought, the tragedy is gonna be that this man fell so far but managed to pick himself up again and chose the better path only for his past to come back to stab him in the back in the form of this guy stabbing him" but then Edmond ends up being quicker and just stabs him before he can hurt him and then he feels guilty about it but Mercedes reassures him that he doesnt need to feel guilty and then thats kinda it
Idk man, i guess my The Count of Monte Cristo review is: good musical, but Im a tragedy enjoyer and I felt severely tragedy-blueballed, like all the elements are there but its just. not a tragedy
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i’ve been very slowly cutting things out of my life. i kinda feel bare right now in the sense that im very lonely and stagnant, not much going on, but im still open to vulnerability, change, and creation. i keep thinking about my future lately. i was doing pretty good at living in the moment but i have this creeping feeling that i need to figure some stuff out...
i’m not really sure about music anymore. i find it enjoyable to make. im proud of myself for what ive done, even if it is kinda shitty. ive heard myself grow musically and vocally over the past year. and im like this with painting as well. ive seen that ive grown a bit, but i still find what i make pretty mediocre. and im fair with myself, i realize ive only been doing these things for a very short amount of time.
the thing about painting is that with the process, its not something i always enjoy. sometimes i get the urge to start and then i do it and im like im not even having fun. like the motivation is there but the joy is not. i dont really get it tbh. i decided maybe the way i was approaching it and the techniques i was using was probably what was making it so burdensome. i have yet to try my new approach (which is a much more messy and flowing style) because ive been so busy with work and ive had absolutely no days off. luckily this week i have a bunch of time and im excited to do some art.
on the other hand, ive been writing my novel pretty steadily. almost everyday, but not quite. sometimes its a bit difficult to get into the mood but once i do i can write for awhile. especially on the train i find it pretty easy, and then i get to my stop and im disappointed because i wanted more time to write.
AND THEN, im working on fashion. i spread myself a little too thin, i think. the thing about fashion and writing is that they are both things that come very naturally to me. (unlike painting, and even less with music.) painting is something that i struggle with and i know i am decent at drawing, but when it comes to music, im completely in the dark with it. vocally, musically, structurally. i could of course teach myself, but i think the whole overwhelms me. its a lot to learn and do and while i feel excited about it at times i cant tell if its because i feel like i need to do it because of an identity thing, or if i genuinely really love it. most of the time i think i do it because im like, well wouldnt be really cool to be an musician and have an album and music videos and perform? and like right now, yeah, that does sound fun as hell. but occasionally i will feel indifferent. or like its just not for me.
but back to fashion, im enjoying it, as little work as ive put into it. i want more time to work on it because what i have done ive enjoyed. i think the thing that triggers all these thoughts in me so often is capitalism... in an ideal world id have all the time to do everything i want, and no pressure at all to feel like i need to do things because of money, success, etc... i could just do them because i love them. its extremely hard for me to see past the capitalist lens. i want to be able to tell if something is right for me or if im just coming about it wrong. over the years my ocd mind has been so plagued by this way of thinking that i feel like ive hardly gotten anything done at all. im really tired of it, honestly. the only good part is that ive crossed a bunch of stuff off my list of things that i thought were right for me but actually arent. like acting for example, ive fully decided that isnt for me, lol.
anyway. i just needed to share and i forgot my journal at home so i had no other place to put all this.
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i think you just have a much higher threshold for pure fucking hatred than i do. i dont mean that as a bad thing. its useful. keeps you sane and level-headed while also keeping sight of your morals while wading through evil bullshit. but ive had at least three mental breakdowns over the past week from this project, this hatred. i cant handle this. i need to detach myself, and care less.
so, what? we're gonna let the ship drift and watch everyone flounder around til we sink out of neglect and incompetence?
no, look. i want to trust you here. i want you to take the reigns with this. i think you can do it. but you have to do it without getting me involved. because i cant keep doing this. its gonna drive me fucking mental.
are you sure this is a good idea?
no, in fact im almost certain its not. but thats why youre here, right? so that i make the bad decision every once in a while?
its the only way to learn and progress.
well, not the only way. books exist.
pussy.
maniac.
we make quite the pair, eh?
shut the fuck up and get your hands at 10 and 2, bitch.
woah, okay. calm down.
im sorry i just. fuck. i really cant handle this.
i really cant handle this. i thought we were good there, for a bit.
we were. we had a good thing going.
what happened? what has happened now to make us completely lose control?
we're alone.
we're not alone. even ignoring the contradiction in that statement, we have a bunch of people we can talk to. same amount we had a week ago, at least.
somethings wrong, then. we're distant.
what the fuck does that mean?
i dont look forward to sleeping anymore. thats what we're missing. or a piece, at least. a byproduct. i looked forward to laying in bed with you, even through we didnt have any pillows so you used my chest instead.
not even though. because.
im sure i wasnt the whole reason. you get it though, right? the stress dreams. sleeping isnt delightful anymore.
i dont know how it was. it never has been before. why the hell did sleeping randomly become an enjoyable activity for just a week after 23 years on this hellhole rock.
we were together. it was just us, in an empty apartment.
so it was the breasts.
fuck off, no, im saying maybe other people are the problem, not the solution. for the first time in our lives we are free, truly free, and the mundane becomes fantastical to us. work doesnt bother us, school is manageable despite repeating one of the worst weeks in our entire academic history, we enjoy living. and now, when we get comfortable, it starts to take over again. the stress. the envy. jealousy, thats what it is. you see the lives others put on display and think wow, theyve got it all together, i wish they could just take care of us the way they obviously know how to take care of themselves. but its an act. you know its an act. we know better than anyone how different masks can be. you need to let go of others. completely. for validation, for praise, for an indication that youre doing the right thing.
hang on. wait. this sounds dangerous.
of course its dangerous! good people care about others! good people want validation so they know they are good! good people ask permission, not forgiveness! since when have you wanted to be good?
i want to do my best.
the best we can do isnt good. we can be good, sure. but the best we can do is be evil in the right ways, for the right reasons. that freedom we felt? that was the feeling of the act being its own reward. good people stay up at night, worried they arent doing enough. evil people delight in sleep, knowing tomorrow brings another day of freedom, and with it, change.
is this abusive?
you know the game. you tell me.
i love you.
i love you too.
~ lets go to bed.
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// skadi spoilers but by this point i think im the last one to actually finish the manor plot HAHA i rlly finished this event with 9hrs left to spare kjkfbjds
man.
man.
im quite sure others who are way smarter than i am (and also not currently nerfed by booster shot fatigue) have discussed the story of the manor of hermes so i wont talk about that specifically i
wanna talk about a common theme in event plots thus far on global
lost gold, symphony of the night, and skadi. these r the three events with full plots to explore. and they all have something in common:
the injustice cannot be undone. but it can be discovered, respected, and protected. and that matters
for lost gold and skadi, the injustice quite literally happens in the past. the murder gang violence treasure boogaloo in lost gold happened years ago and its ripples had reached far to characters who were still alive, who brought the story back into the present due to revenge, desperation, or greed. erin and winter's story in skadi similarly happened in the past as well. you cant change the past. you can only do things in the present and moving forward in the future.
in symphony of the night, it's a bit different but also not. the team investigate with the hope that medilla can still be saved but then later realize hes been dead all along, they were too late. you cant change the past.
that is constant. you cant change the past. the injustice has happened and theres no undoing that ever. people got hurt, people died, people are never going to be the same after what happened to them in their stories.
but what the team does in reaction to all of this is what makes me really frigging emotional
in lost gold, the team bring all the truth to light and get the people who are still alive and guilty of shit to justice. in symphony of the night, they launch medilla's program to destroy centipede and they fulfill lilith's wish of doing the AI equivalent of dying. in skadi, the team learn the horrible story of the manor and the two innocent people who suffered so much in it and their final point is this:
respect what has happened, protect these people even if theyre gone, do as much as you can in the present and the future because you cannot change the past
it's bittersweet, hell, it's fucking depressing in some viewpoints; that no matter how smart and skilled the nxx investigation team is, there are cases theyll take that are just done already. the story is frigging over. theres no helping a corpse, some would think.
but the story and the team posit that action can still be taken. it can be taken by bringing remaining living people to justice, by discovering the truth wholly, by respecting the full story in its sadness, and by continuing to go on anyway as like, protectors of what has happened.
this is in line with the whole game, thematically, which is focused on the law and bringing people to justice. but i dunno, maybe im overthinking this, but it's an important thing to me irt to like....life. like, what can you do for somebody who isnt here anymore? theyve already suffered, theyre already gone, what is there to do after every culprit has been taken down?
the answer seems to be this: learn the full story and remember it. learn everybody involved and commit it to memory. whats important about past tragedies is working to make sure it doesnt happen again, and for that, memory is essential pragmatically. it's also essential in a more emotional sense that like...in remembering what happened, an aspect of all of it is still alive. commit the names to memory both for justice and for humanity.
#tot spoilers#tears of themis#this is probly me being too deep about it but idk it matters to me also i cried with the manor story ok#but it matters to remember
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An Angel and A Demon ~ Pyramid Head x Reader
Update 2: My laptop restarted when I was in the middle of writing this, and trust me when I say it, I am positively pissed off, and I want to end my days, that's how bad of a day this was.
And I didn't leave the house.
That says a lot about today...
Update 1: But, without further ado, I was half-way writing this story, and I received this ask, and let me tell you...
helloooo, i absolutely adored the fanfics you wrote about kazan and danny🥺 could i request one where pyramid head is just really whipped for and in love with the survivor! reader but he doesnt know how to announce it to them so he brings her random ,,gifts" in and outside the trials and protecting her bc well, im pretty sure he cant speak so he doesnt really have any other options on how to express his feelings??
I live for it.
Bless you for sending me this, it's the reason I'm still sane right now.
I love you, baby-cakes.
Update 3: I want to kill myself so bad. Just smash my head on a wall until it explodes or sth. I was so happy with how this imagine turned out, only fuck fucking tumblr to just fucking delete EVERYTHING just as I was about to put the last gif and hit POST NOW.
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For the 5th time writing this :
FUCKMEDADDY - but this time - FUCKMYBRAINSOUTPLEASEIWANNADIE
Thanks.
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Hell - What was that place, anyway?
Some would describe it as an infinite ocean of flames and lava, where it's eternally melting-hot, and a bunch of hooved, horned, tailed red demons torture you with acid, with their red pitch forks, or boil you alive in their cauldron for soup. Or maybe you just get tortured by Stalin, who knows?
But never would have anyone thought that 'Hell' could look so...Normal. Well, normal in a very demolished, desolate, ravished way, but still...Normal, by human standards. Albeit, the never-ending loop of madness, anguish, agony and desperation of getting killed in different gruesome ways or fleeing for their lives and feeling a myriad of emotions pumping adrenaline through their veins so badly that their anxiety-meter skyrocketed to abnormal levels.
All this darkness, this hatred, this...Everything...It changed all the survivors. They became selfish, stubborn, rude, some even went as far as to sacrifice their fellow survivors in trials, just so they could survive. It was a complete mayhem that defied all kinds of reason, normality, morality or even ethics. Everyone became devoid of any laws that used to bind them to their humane sides, and now, you weren't sure if the killers were saner than the survivors or not.
But even in this abyss where you couldn't even see your hand in front of your very eyes, there was a little star - A beautiful angel radiating brightness and warmth, someone who was somehow able to guide everyone's straying souls with her benevolence.
In reality, she was merely a survivor, not the little lantern from an angler fish's head, but she treated everyone with such an untainted kindness...It was beautiful, and yet, unrequited for most parts. Everyone was still putting their own lives above all - And who could condemn them? - Perhaps their cowardice, for the girl preferred to save her fellow survivors as much as possible, even if that oftentimes assured her place on the hook, to be a sacrificial lamb for the Entity.
On the other hand, she rarely ended up on the hook - Most killers prefer to kill her themselves, instead of letting her become pray for the horrible Entity who tortured so many of them for refusing to cooperate - The Trapper, Evan MacMillan - He knew the best, with those hooks digging into his flesh, impossible to extract. He was the first to protect this girl. It wasn't much, but if he had to, he'd rather give her a swift, painless death, than seeing her without that serene, angelic smile on her face, as the Entity feeds on the last bits of her soul's beauty, the last parts of her humanity.
The other Killers were confused at the Trapper's actions, but little by little, they began to understand why this girl was so precious and special - And this domino effect hit Rin Yamaoka next, with Y/N stopping in the middle of a chase and taking off her jacket, just as Rin was about to butcher her with her katana, and she smiled, extending it to her. 'You must be cold' she said, realising that the Spirit was merely wearing a few bandages, not even her school uniform, or her kimono.
The ghost girl was shaken up by this, and told the others at the killer camp, but they just shrugged it off - Rin was a little girl who faced close to no kindness, they weren't surprised she was so taken aback by such a feat. That is, until Adiris, in a particularly terrible day, when everyone at the camp was staying away from her, as her profane censer wasn't able to cover the stench of rotting flesh - Y/N came over, taking out a small yet elegant glass bottle with pink liquid on it, spraying some on her - And now, The Plague smelled of roses and vanilla - 'You can come to me for perfume whenever you want, I always carry some with me!' she grinned at the Babylonian High Priestess, before leaving back to the survivor's camp site, leaving the ancient God symbol to stare with her mouth agape at the girl.
These words began to spread, and it was no surprise when the killers saw Susie clinging and begging her Legion friends to spare Y/N, for she was there to hug away her worries more than once, to tell her sweet words, to play with her hair and play the guitar whatever songs she wanted to hear, to get reminded of her home - She was so home sick that she freaked out, but now she was better, thanks to Y/N - 'I know you miss home, but sometimes, home is where your best friends are, and all three of them are here!' she tried to encourage the cute pink-haired girl who could only squeal and hug her new friend.
Even Ghostface wasn't exempt from falling to her charms, and they would often take silly selfies and mess around, making fun of the old horror movie tropes and doing lots of puns and pranks - So much that she even got his trust to be told about the Danny/Jed thing, and how he began his killer profession - 'You're a very talented photographer, Danny! You deserved all that recognition you got, both as a journalist, and as a killer!'
And very soon, Y/N found herself in the crushing arms of an overprotective Anna, humming her mother's lullaby together with walking through the forest, Y/N making flower crows for all the female killers at the camp site, and little by little, she somehow managed to worm her way under everyone's skins.
Y/N was the survivor with the highest survivability percentage, and maybe the Entity sometimes got pissed off, but at least she still got killed sometimes, so who cares? Well, that was soon to change as soon as a new Killer was added to this sick game - Pyramid Head, the terror of Silent Hill, as Cheryl, the new Survivor, called him - or The Executioner, as he was known now. He was ruthless, merciless, grotesque - He had his own criteria of killing, his own moral compass, ethics, conscience and understanding of the concept of life and death. Nothing that could compare to the visions of humans, clearly - Everything was gravitating around Divine Retribution and Justice, but the from the outside, he was nothing but a killing machine.
He would kill everyone and anyone that crosses his path, without fail.
Y/N felt like her fortune ended completely the second she found herself in the new, overly cramped map, with Pyramid Head as the killer - She couldn't help but run around like a spazzic meerkat, trying to find and fix as many generators as possible, without having to get face to face with the walking hazard...
Only to run past a stuck Pyramid Head.
Slowly backtracing her steps, she saw the mountain of a man with his metal pyramid stuck in the frames a low window which he tried to walk over. He was trashing like a raged bull trying to attack a matador, but it was clear he was getting nowhere with this.
"H-Hey, u-uhm...Need some help?" she asked in a soft, careful voice, almost like a meek cat trying to test the waters, but in return, he started groaning even louder from the wrath he wanted to unleash upon the whole world. "Okay, uhm...I think I saw a can of vaseline in one of the chests around. I'll go fetch it and I'll come back for you. Don't move." she said, only to then realise how horrible that sounded, considering the situation, and it only seemed to anger the killer. "...I'm sorry, ignore me, I'm an idiot." she slapped herself pretty harshly before bolting out of there trying to find the chest.
However, Y/N cursed herself for not having perfectly memorised the whole map by heart already, since she found the vaseline can after the 3rd chest, and then, it took quite a while to find the bloody window that got the killer stuck - And by the time she got there, she was dead tired. "Okay, I'm here, I found the vaseline! Let's try to get you out of here." Y/N muttered as she put her feet on the low window pane to get to his level. "If it's not too much trouble, could you please hold onto me? I can't balance myself with both hands occupied, and I'd rather not fall." she explained as she opened the vaseline can, only to shiver as she felt two big, strong hands getting a firm grip on her hips. It was almost...Endearing, were she not too busy trying to get the killer unstuck. She kept massaging the metal edge, trying to push and pull, also praying to whatever deity that existed in her human world that she had her tetanus shot done on time - Until finally, she was able to get hear a loud screech, like a pop, and the killer got unstuck, and in the process, he stumbled backwards, while Y/N fell down on her butt.
"Ouchie..." she muttered, rubbing her back and sides to take away the pain surging through her body. "Are you okay?" she asked, almost intuitively, without realising it at first, until she heart a low grunt that brought her back to reality. "O-Oh...! You have glass shards stuck in your side! And you're bleeding too! Hold up, let me help." she hurried to his side, while the killer merely stiffened, feeling her delicate, slender fingers tracing his body, while he heaved and slouched his shoulders from the repressed wrath. "It may sting a bit, and I'm really sorry, but I promise it will be better soon." her voice was so motherly and warm, which also resonated in her actions, as she gingerly took a water bottle and imbued some tissues with it, to wipe away the blood smearing down his skin as she extracted the glass shards, and then..."This is grandma's marigold ointment. It's really good, and it smells nice." she explained as she carefully smeared a thick layer of the yellow ointment on the biggest wounds, while the little ones were covered by smiley-flower patterned plasters. They were cute, and colourful, and they never failed to make her smile. "Okay, there we go, all better! I hope you'll feel better very soon!" her voice got a tiny bit more cheerful and upbeat.
It made the Killer think about a trillion things, as he stepped in front of her, towering over her like the Empire states building next to a smiling pomeranian. What was with this girl? Why did she help a killer? And why did he feel so...Warm inside? He could sense a foreign kind of luminosity, a naivite and innocence that he only witnessed in children and animals. This woman in front of him was untainted by the darkness and evil of the world.
It didn't matter how many hardships she's been through, or how much sadness she had to endure - Her soul remained as pure as any snowdrop, as the first snow of winter, as the fleece of a baby lamb who let out its first 'meeeeh' to its mamma sheep.
He couldn't allow this human to be maimed in any way - Not by the world, not by the Entity, and certainly not by him. - Screw the Entity, Pyramind Head kills by his own rules, and now, he was blessed to be faced with a human who bore no real hatred for her peers, or for the world, despite the horrible situation she was thrown into.
He didn't understand, obviously, especially as he remembered the myriad of abominations that lurked through Silent Hill, all of them created by the torment of humans - The very torment that distorted their own reality, which resulted in him needing to solve the purpose as The Executioner - Eradicating the world of all evil.
"Th-This sword is so heavy...H-How can you carry this around like that...?! Your muscles must be so strained and sore...Y-You really need a massage, I'm sure." she stuttered as she tried to lift the much taller and heavier sword from the ground, only for the brute to simply bend and pick it up with extreme ease, putting the girl to shame with her complete lack of strength. "Hehe...You're really strong. I'm embarrassed now." she chuckled softly, scratching the back of her neck.
Before she could leave or do anything else, Pyramid Head picked her up by the throat, careful not to hurt her or restrict her air intake - I mean, how else was he supposed to carry her so he wouldn't hurt her with his metal head or sword? - and it was pretty clear she didn't feel any malevolence from him, as she clinged on his forearm, trying to keep herself up, only to be dumped on top of the hatch, as the killer pointed towards it, so she would leave.
"O-Oh...! Thank you so much! You're really kind! I really appreciate this...I-I know it probably doesn't matter much to you, since you'll be doing this over and over again with all the survivors...But I really appreciate you for your kind gesture, and I appreciate you for being so nice with me. Thank you. Take care!" her dazzling smile lit the whole place up, but he couldn't talk, nor could he tell her how he should be the one thanking her for showing him that, despite the hundreds and thousands of years he had to roam the 'Earth' and execute the injust, miracles still existed.
As soon as she reached the survivor's camp, everyone cheered for her, asking how in the world could she have escaped the wrath of the butcher. "Oh, but he wasn't that bad. In fact, he's much more humane than I anticipated! I think he has a beautiful, blooming heart!" okay, she's lost it - the other survivors thought - but even so, she's always been a bit...Out of it, so who cares?
It took quite a while for the other three survivors to reach the camp, all bloody, in fact, like the new killer, who dragged himself with the same menace to the Killers' camp. "How the hell did you manage to survive?!" they yelled at her in utter shock, seeing that she got out of there unscratched. "Oh, you see...I found the hatch." she shrugged simply, not wanting to give away that the person who massacred those three was a soft one and he basically threw her down the hatch to her safety.
As she took a twig to roast a marshmallows, she noticed how Pyramid Head was standing much farther away from the rest of the killers - She knew that silent killers were bound to stay away from the more obnoxious one, remembering how Michael Myers almost killed Ghostface and The Legion at least a dozen times - But this time...He seemed kinda...Lonely? So Y/N took the matters into her own hands, roasted another marshmallow in another twig, and when it was done, she went to the killer's camp, calling out the lonely one's name - She has no idea why, but he actually followed her, pushing her further deep into the forest, until he was sure nobody was going to hear, see or interrupt them...
"Hey. You seemed pretty lonely out there...I thought you could use a friend. Thank you again for what you did at the trial...Here, this is a marshmallow. I don't think you've had many before...Cheryl told me of that horrible place you had to live in...So I hope this will make your day a bit better!" Y/N extended one of her hands towards him, so he could take the marshmallow - And a long, black tongue erupted from underneath the pyramid, snatching away the fluffy marshmallow and gulping it in one go.
What the hell was he turning into?
A towering man built of pure muscle, wrath and divine justice, with a pyramid representing the evil of humanity burdening his body, and a sword taller and heavier than the average human being constantly dragged in one of his hand...He now was a slave to a cute, innocent girl who was putting flower plasters on his minuscule wounds that would heal in a heartbeat regardless - He saved this girl who was now offering his these soft, squishy things that tasted overly sugarly, just like her upbeat and cheerful personality - If he could eat her, he was sure she would taste even sweeter than this - A sickish kind of sweet, that is.
She was indeed a beautiful angel in this tragic hell. But he didn't wait to snatch the second marshmallow either.
"Ah...! You liked it, didn't you? Well...Next time, I promise I'll give you more!" she grinned at him the same way a princess would to her chivalrous knight who saved her. The since he couldn't talk, silence took over them - It wasn't an uncomfortable one, per se, but it made it feel as if the conversation was over. "W-Well...I'll guess I'll see you around! Take care and I hope to see you again soon!" she waved cutely, trying to turn around back to her camp, only to feel a rough hand on her shoulder, turning her around and urging her to stop and wait for him and he went deep into the forest, leaving her alone and undefended by the potential malevolent forces of the forest.
When he returned, however, he stepped right in front of her, creating the perfect shade as he towered over her - Then he kneeled in front of her, so he would reach her eye sight, then he tucked a strand of hair behind her ear and put a beautiful pink flower - As pink as the blush that started creeping on her face - He wanted to see her luminous face better, to highlight her dazzling smile and her glimmering eyes as the warm, silver light of the mother moon caressed her face.
Y/N felt her heart picking up the pace - It was beating so much faster than ever before - But this time, it wasn't out of fear or anything negative...It was something good. Something she never felt in her life, especially with her human acquaintances from back home. None was as chivalrous and gentle with her as this butcher of tormented souls - The bringer of justice, the merciless Executioner who was supposed to end the life of every living being that would cross his path.
It was insane how every Yin finds its Yang, even if that comes in the form of a little lamb of a small, frail girl, and a huge abomination of a brute man who knows nothing but death, bloodshed and carnage. It was truly crazy how opposites attract, and here she was, holding the killers large hands and gingerly putting them on her face, leaning into his touch - She felt safer now than ever in her life - Now, in the arms of an ancient killer.
An Angel and A Demon brought together in a perfect union.
As she leaned down, she touched the metal of the pyramid where she anticipated his forehead would be with her own forehead, and closing her eyes, she finally felt herself calming down. There was no need for words, actions spoke louder than anything, and she appreciated it...She appreciated him.
"Thank you." she whispered to him, knowing that yes, even though nobody else would hear it anyway, it was much more intimate than anything she ever experienced.
She was hooked.
Hope you liked my completely shameless pun, I couldn't stop it, especially after the pain I went through trying to write this...3 freaking times.
Yay.
#dead by daylight#dead by daylight x reader#dead by daylight imagine#dbd#dbd x reader#dbd imagine#silent hill#silent hill x reader#silent hill imagine#pyramid head#pyramid head x reader#pyramid head imagine#red pyramid#red pyramid x reader#red pyramid imagine
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Angel has Kai’s baby in their 3rd (last) year of highschool and Kai has no idea since she hid her pregnancy so 2 years later Kai breaks up with angel to focus on his “experiments” when Kai is sent to Tartarus the guards tell him that he has a visitor and there’s angel and his child and Kai starts to tear up
"Eh...?" you could only mutter in disbelief as Kai read some papers with an unbothered expression.
"I know you for about five years (Y/n). I know you dont have any issues with your hearing." He muttered coldly before sighing and placing the papers on the desk.
"You... want to break up...? Why? What did I do?" You asked with trembling lips as he stared at your eyes.
"Is more about on what you can't and won't do." He pressed his fingers on the bridge of his nose before waving it in the air "You know I am the future leader of the hassaikai. And having you near would be only a distraction to my experiments to give this place more credit. You would be like a rock on my path to gain some knowledge."
"You're kidding right?" You almost sobbed "You always told me I was like a safe place for you to go. What the hell happened to that? Or the promises you made for me for us to get married?" He blinked before answering.
"I was foolish. We have a life ahead of us and well, having you being clingy on my back would be a nuisance while working."
The ground could swallow you for all you cared... what the supposed love of your life just said was enough to leave you with eyes red and legs felling like they were trembling.
"Please dont cry. You're dropping them on the ground. And I dont even know if you're clean." You gritted your teeth before breathing in and looking at Kai Chisaki for what you swore for one last time.
"Very well. You want to break up because I'm only a bother to your path to greatness oh punny God? So be it." You walked until you felt him grabbing your wrist until you snatched it away from him.
"When the time is right, we can get back together." He spoke like he was in a fucking meeting in a company.
"No." You hissed "Chisaki I loved you, and I gave you everything of me even supporting your ideas. But then you want to break up with out of no where saying I would ruin your plans by simply existing neat you and to top it off you call me clingy and a nuisance?"
You could see a tad bit of remorse on his eyes as he pondered for a second his own words maybe, but before he could speak you sobbed and opened the door.
"Don't ever look for me Chisaki. And for your information..." you hesitated and gulped down the urge to just yell what you had discovered just earlier while clenching your purse where the pregnancy test lied on.
"What?" He asked, now no longer seeing to be bothered by your sadness and outburst.
"... good luck on your life. I hope you're happy with this obstacle getting away from you." You muttered before closing the door and walking out until you cursed and screamed while you ran as the rain started to make an appearance.
Not noticing the germophobic himself running out of the house with an umbrella to give it to you and soaked as well as he watched with a dread expression your figurine run away...
.
.
Ten years later...
.
.
"I swear Kaiyo... you gonna drive me crazy one of these days." You spoke heartedly as the boy with brow hair laughed in embarrassment while scrubbing the back of his head as you caught all the pieces of the broken chair on the ground.
"Sorry ma! I got carried away." You scoffed but soon smiled at his tiny hands and focused face morph the pieces and piece them back together and with a proud face show you the new constructed chair with a 'tad a!'
"Wow. Impressive sweety!" You patted his hair as he "complained", golden eyes shinning brightly at looking at you with a huge smile on.
Life sometimes was cruel to give the child you loved the exact same face as their father which teared your heart at pieces. But your love for your son was stronger than this stupid thing.
Kaiyo was your son. Not his.
"Ne ne ma? Father's day is coming up!" Kaiyo said and you froze for a moment before sighing while washing the dishes.
Here we go...
"Yes it is coming." You muttered as the boy sneak around and looked up at you.
"You know I dont really care about what the other kids say about me having only a mom but..." he rested his face on his crossed arms on the sink while shyly looking up at you "I was just curious... if I am going to meet mine..."
You sighed while placing the now dry plates on their place before giving your son the best smile you could get.
"Kaiyo, your father is just a very busy name. When we were together he had.. uh.. family business to take care of, so that's why we cant see him much." Kaiyo seemed a bit dissapointmented and it tore you apart.
You could have your own issues with Kai but that didn't mean you would make his son hate him...
"Well... Sato's also got a busy dad but.." he shook his head, messy brow bangs shaking along with his head, until he gave you a bright smile "That's okay! I just hope I get to meet him one day! And that he gets back to you and apologize foe being a dork! So us three can live together!"
A child can dream, right?
But you knew that Kai needed to know the existence of Kaiyo... you werent ignorant...
"Yeah kiddo. Let's hope for the best." You carresed his cheek before kissing it "Okay. Enough talk. Time for bed young man."
"Awww already?" He pouted as you giggled.
"How about that? You go get ready and I tell you stories about me and daddy while we were together?"
"Can I get my plushie of mr Nighteye?" You giggled. Something Kaiyo definitely wasn't equal to his father was his fascination with heroes.
"Sure honey. Now shoo! Go go go!" You squished his cheeks as he laughed and ran towards his room on the apartment.
You snorted at sign before preparing yourself for digging the past once again for the sake of your son.
.
.
.
"MOM!" You almost chopped your finger along with the carrot at the shout of Kaiyo before looking at him in worry to se ehkm pointing at the T.V with horror "The heroes-! The green hero with the girl-!"
You immediately went to his side only to widened your eyes at the image in front of you.
Chisaki..?
"Ma! He is a villain! A BIG ONE!"your son whimpered while going for you for a hug while stared in shock... "Ma? Why are you trembling?"
"H-Huh?" You let out until you gasped at seeing this teenager punching Chisaki square in the face...
"Ma?! You're okay?!"
You didn't know what to feel, but surely you weren't expecting tears to fall when this girl hand cuffed your ex boyfriend and the cops and heroes to put him into a van to surely got to the prison. Tartarus you bet.
You felt a hand rubbing your cheek and soon looked at your son wide teary eyes.
"M-Mommy...?" You hugged him close to your chest and holding his head close as your heart almost slammed out of your chest. "What happened? Are you okay?"
"I-i... I'm okay honey." You inhaled before looking into Kaiyo's golden eyes to see worry on them. "Hey, mommy's okay."
"Ma...?"
"Hm?"
"That man looked like me..."
.
How long was he here? Months?
Didn't matter. Nothing mattered more... everything was taken from him. Including his own arms. Now he was just as useless as a cockroach.
Worst of all? His own father figurine on a damn hospital because of him...
Pathetic.
'Is funny how things change' is what you used to say... he found himself scoffing while pressing the back of his head on the wall.
He hadn't stop thinking about you ever since the day he made the decision of breaking up with you. He did tried inumerous times to contact you when he took leadership of the Hassaikai... but he just gave up.
"Probably married with kids already... why are you even thinking about her on the first place..?" he murmured to himself as he felt his chest tighten in sadness.
Everything was just... what he deserved.
He sighed. Closing his eyes for just a split second until he heard banging on the door of his cell until a guard opened the window on it to glare daggers at him.
"Get up. You have visitors."
"Leave me in here. I thought your job was to take seriously enough to not make jokes." He spoke on a hoarse voice until the cell opened with two guards already on it.
"I cant understand why you have visitors as well but get your ass up already."
He just blinked until he got up, two guards in front of him and one behind as he walked.
He just hoped it was fast.
He entered the room, mirrors which surely was where cops were hidden as he sitted down on a chair and waited until the door of iron opened by another guard.
"Right here ma'am. And remember the rules please."
"Of course." His eyes widened and he snapped his head up to see if he hadn't got crazy.
But no. You were there.
Gosh.. you didn't change at all... was even more beautiful than what his mind could have remember.
He stood there in shock as you got in but along with you... holding your hand, was a boy. Dressed with clothes but he surely didn't looked content about being in here.
His face dropped at seing the kid... you had moved on.
"One hour." The guard said locking the door as you stood there awkwardly, while the kid holding onto to you was glaring at the ground.
He wanted to say something but nothing came out as he was still in shock at seeing out of all people you decided to visit him.
The heels you wore clicked on the ground as you walked towards the table and sit down and the boy right by your side on the other chair... not even once you made eye contact with him.
"... (y/n)..." he whispered, still looking at you as if you were some angelical creature.
"Hey... long time that we dont see each other right? Chisaki." You spoke... not with a smile but not with hatred.
It was a start.
"You... hadn't changed a... a bit." He spoke, voice scratching at his throat as your eyes finally met his, his heart was beating loudly on his chest.
It felt like he was in high school again...
"Should I take that as a compliment?"
"I.. I didn't meant to offend you. Apologies." He bowed his head a bit as you sighed, looking at him with wide eyes out of the sudden.
"Oh God what happened to your arms?!" You almost screamed as the kid also seemed to notice.
"Long story... just.. a business that went wrong." He explained with dread as you seemed to relax a but while nodding.
It remained quiet for a bit only for the sound of the clock on the wall until he decided to break the silence.
".. so.. er.." gosh he was horrible with this "how is your life? Any.. uh.. you got the degree you wanted? I remember how you talked about it..."
You sighed with dissapointment as you looked at everywhere but him.
"No. I haven't... but I see you got what you wanted before being arrested though." You muttered and he let out a bitter chuckle.
"Almost.. yeah." He tapped his foot twice until he spotted the kid glaring at him with similiar gold eyes... "Married?"
"No. I thought it would be a distraction while taking care of my son." You spoke abruptly... as you looked at the boy beside you... "Anyway... I need to give you this."
You showed to him a paper before putting on the desk.
"What.. what is this?"
"Is a DNA test." You spoke coldly "To prove that you do have a son."
His eyes widened at that as he looked at the paper... and then to the boy whose was glaring at him not moments ago...
"Wha... but... "
"Remember the day when we split off? Yeah... was the day I discovered."
"W... why didn't you said something?" He asked in oure horror as you giggled in sarcasm.
"For what? This would only trouble you right?" You said with such venom on your voice that he felt a sting to his chest before you breathed in slowly before exhaling "I'm here because I thought you had the right to know... even after ten years.."
He looked at the kid and soon could tell the similarly between him and the boy... you had to raise a child with his face on it alone and he had broken things because of his own selfishness...
"What... what is his name?"
You pondered for a second before sighing, caressing the boy's hair.
"Come on honey... introduce yourself to your dad..." the boy huffed before opening his eyes and looking at him.
"I'm (L/n) Kaiyo. I cant say is very nice to meet you but my mom told me to say it for respect." He almost cringed at the introduction as he saw you looking at him with anger.
"Kaiyo." You warned as the boy scoffed.
"Dont need to scold him. He is not exactly wrong..." he ended up saying while you looked at him.
"I raised Kaiyo to have respect though."
"Why should I have respect towards him in the first place?" He looked at the dark brow haired kid "Not only he abandoned you ma but he is a villain! A very bad one! That girl on the Tv should be the same age if not younger than me!" The boy gritted with a few tears escaping his face.
"Kaiyo please... "
"Incredible..." you and Kaiyo suddenly looked at him "Despite having my features you are just like your mother... I would be proud of it..."
"... I'm not proud of being a villain's son." He muttered while sniffing "You abandoned us. I know ma hadn't said a thing to you but now I do."
You bited on your lips as he looked at loss of words at what he just heard from a child...
"... I know it doesn't change a thing but... I never stopped thinking about... your mother. About you (Y/n)."
"DONT REFER TO MY MOM AS HER FIRST NAME!" Kaiyo banged his fists on the table before you took him in your arms as the boy sobbed "You never cared! You-You-! Grandpa said you called my ma a bother! You are a MURDER!" The kid cried.
"I'm sorry about that..." you mumbled as you cradled the crying boy in your arms "He didn't take well Mr. Nighteye death..."
"M-Ma-! I wanna go home!"
"But Kaiyo, your da-"
"He IS NOT MY DAD!" he cried in you as you sighed as Chisaki seemed to be dying little by little at each second this visit had.
"I'm... going to go. Another day we will visit. Take care, Chisaki." You spoke before he could hear it and he stood up abruptly from his chair.
"No! Wait-!"
The door closed...
.
Months later
.
"Ma look. Hawk's wings are healing." The kid pointed at the news and you smiled.
"That's amazing! We could use some good news!" You chirped as Kaiyo smiled until both of you heard the door bell of your apartment ring.
"Huh. Weird usually grandpa or grandma visits us on-" you opened the door and you almost screamed at the sign of that same green haired kid on your door but now he seemed so... broken...
"Ma'am.. I'm sorry to bother you, but he said he can crash a bit in here... later cops will come to get him. I'm sorry but I need to go." Your son walked and squealed at sign.
"A hero!" Your son smiled brightly at him and for once, Deku had showed a smile for real... until you saw Chisaki leaning bruised to the core resting on the wall next to your door...
"Chisaki..." you breathed out as your son looked at him in shock.
"I'm sorry. Both of you..." he muttered while looking at the storm outside.
#overhaul x reader#chisaki kai x reader#chisaki kai#kai chisaki#overhaul#kai chisaki x reader#bnha villains x reader#bnha villains#x (y/n)#female reader#zuffer writings#holy moly this one was long
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Toman’s Little Fighter.
Draken x fem.Reader oneshot
Genre : fluff- angst-happy ending
Warnings: mention of violence-blood-kidnapping-swearing words.
Word count: 5.9k
Summary: Draken is assigned to convince badass (y\n) to join Toman for certain reasons. They have a dynamic relationship full of bickering. They end up falling for each other and confess under difficult circumstances.
“Ah what a day finally school is over” you said to yourself ruffling your hair and carrying your heavy school bag. “Huh what’s that sound?” you frowned and rushed to the source “ah really brats bullying a kid again? Why do they do that, should I help him or should I stop getting into fights this time?” you said watching them from a far. Three big guys were beating up the shit out of a boy. “ah shit I think I’ll never change” you breathed and walked towards them. The guy was about to throw a punch to knock that boy out but was suddenly stopped by a strong grip. All of them looked at you in disbelief, who are you? And what are you trying to do? “Are you lost beautiful?” said that guy smirking, the other two approached you one of them put his hand on your shoulder “How can we help you?” “Take your hands off of me brat” you said slapping his hand away and pushing the other guy’s fist that was stopped by you. “wow wow are you trying to get our attention huh? you can just ask honey” said the 3rd guy smirking “ple-ease leave d-don’t get yourself into trouble because of me” said that boy coughing on the ground, you smiled and said “don’t worry it will be fine” then you turned your face to look at them “3 VS 1? That’s not a fair fight…but it’s fair for me” “you better leave this place or I have to smash that beautiful face” “give it a shot then or you’re scared to get your ass beaten by a woman” you teased throwing your school bag on the ground ready to fight, the guy was fueling with anger “you little-“ he ran in your direction and grabbed your collar you twisted his hand making him growl in pain then you used your free hand to punch his stomach making him fall. The other two tried to grab your hands to stop your attacks but you were faster and more flexible and punched one of them on his nose making it bleed. It didn’t take you long to finish the fight, so when the other guy tried to fight you, you turned around then kicked his jaw (round side kick) knocking him down as well. “bunch of idiots. Ah I fucking hate bullies” you said fixing your skirt. You looked down “are you okay?” he nodded still shocked from the fight that happened before his eyes. Before you can say something else someone yelled “TAKEMICHI” both of you looked and there were 3 guys looking at you, you clenched your fists you thought they wanted to hit him “oh Mikey” said Takemichi. “so his name is Takemichi” you thought to yourself. You bend a bit to his level and said “well you’re safe now! Next time don’t stop defending yourself, even if your knees are on the ground you’re still able to stand up” you flushed him another smile then grabbed your bag and left. He was stunned by your presence. “excuse me!” said Mikey, you turned your head to look at him “thank you” he added, you just nodded and glanced at the two guys who were looking at you in pure shock and disbelief. “Draken, Mitsuya come here” said Mikey smiling, “Mikey did you see her?” asked Takemichi “she..she fought them” “yes we saw everything” “why didn’t you come?” “Well we rushed here to save you but we stopped the moment we saw her beat all of them up” exclaimed Draken. “Mikey don’t tell me that you’re thinking about that?” asked Mitsuya after seeing Mikey’s excited expression “Actually I am” he stopped for a moment then looked at Draken “oi ken-chin, I have a mission for you!” “huh?” “go after her.. you have to know where she lives, and you’ll start the plan tomorrow” “Mikey are you insane! There’s no way she would agree!!” fought Draken, “Yes Mikey , she even thought they were bullies I’m sure if she knew they’re actually gang members she wouldn’t rush to my rescue!” everyone nodded in agreement “but she knocked them down right? That’s what matters. C’mon you saw her fighting skills…Woah she was cool” “Mikey-“ “That’s my final decision Draken, you have to do your best to convince her, and the rest is up to her” added Mikey getting on his motorcycle. “good luck!” muttered Takemichi, in return Draken rolled his eyes and rushed after you. You were walking to your house kicking rocks and lost in your thoughts “ah that tall guy looked so hot tho” you felt something strange, you felt like someone was following you “oh maybe it’s just a cat”..”Shit she almost caught me…so she lives here.. hmm not too far” he said as he saw you open your house’s door. *The next day* “hurry up Draken” “damn it Mikey don’t be too excited about it”. It was a normal day for you ready to go to the martial arts club when someone suddenly appeared in front of you “hey” “oh hell- I saw you yesterday! You’re the hot gu- I- I mean you were there” “I don’t have time so you have to come with me” he said coldly “excuse you? Hah where are you planning to take me?” “to meet the Toman’s president” “Toman?” “Our gang” “g-gang?” you said as you took a step backward “and why would I meet your president or whatever?”. Draken took a deep breath clearly pissed “well that’s an order so you better come with me now” “or what?” “You’re really begging for trouble, aren’t you?” ”first all, whatever your name is, I don’t take orders-” “my name is Draken” “Okay Draken! move aside or I’ll be late and that’s a big no no for me” you walked beside him but he grabbed your wrist “Don’t lie school is over” “I still go to school clubs..is that a problem?” you answered offensively trying to pull your hand from his strong grip. “I’ll be back tomorrow”, then left, without giving you the chance to answer. You were so confused why the hell a gang member is at your door, why his leader wants to meet you. All of these questions rushed inside your head but now he’s gone so probably you’ll ask him tomorrow if he had the courage to comeback. *Time skip* “you’re here again?” “listen I’m not trying to force you or-“ “oh really ? Because it doesn’t seem like that at all!” you said crossing your arms “it’s just a suggestion” “and I said no! is it hard to get it in your brain?” “I can’t give up, this mission is my responsibility” “why would I trust you?”you exclaimed approaching him “and why would we hurt you? You saved our member so we have no intention to harm you” “please Draken just give up I’m not joining you, I want to have a normal life” in less than a second you were pinned to the wall, you gasped and looked at the man towering you, he was so close to you making your heart skip a beat “listen if the situation was in my hands I would never recruit someone like you, but unfortunately it’s Mikey’s decision” he said in a cold tone his eyes fixated on you. You pushed his chest and yelled “the hell are you doing?” he just gave you a death glare and left “YOU’RE CRAZY DON’T COME HERE EVER AGAIN-is he ignoring me?…that bastard!” you ruffled your hair and get into your house. *In Mikey’s garage* “Ken-chin finally you’re here…did you convince her?” “that brat ah she’s so stubborn” he said punching the wall “I don’t know why you’re so interested in her Mikey” “ah? Isn’t that obvious? she’s a strong fighter we need her” “NO WE DON’T MIKEY…we have all of these men. Aren’t they enough?” “no..” said Mikey munching on his dorayaki. Days passed and Draken is still trying, he’s so fed up with you and the whole situation. Like he can just throw you on his shoulder and take you with him but Mikey warned him to not scare you away. “DRAKEN YOU NEED TO GO NOW” “huh chifuyu what’s wong?” “They’ll go after her! They knew about her address and they’re planning to kidnap her” “WHAT?WHY?” “did you forget that she knocked out 3 of them?-wait she doesn’t know that they were gang members?” asked Baji “…no..” “Draken “go get her before they can reach her house” “Draken I’ll go with you” said Takemichi “no stay here I’ll handle it” said Draken rushing out to save you. *meanwhile* “he didn’t come today I think he finally gave up…that’s better” you thought to yourself walking in your neighborhood. You were ready to take the stairs to your apartment when you saw 3 motorcycles there and 3 guys waiting by the stairs “huh who are they?” you took a step forward but stopped when you realized that you actually know that uniform, you gasped “no way did they come here to fight me again…aah bullies” unexpectedly you said the last word a bit loud. All of them looked at you “oh shit” and you started running all the groceries fell on the ground “GO AFTER HER” all of them are now chasing you, they were so fast “YOU CANT RUN AWAY FROM US”. You stopped looking behind you when a hand closed your mouth and pulled you into an alley. Your back bumped into someone’s chest, you struggled to break free but you couldn’t “shhh”. Then you saw the guys run to the other direction and you were safe “stop squirming” you recognized the voice so you bit his hand that was on your mouth “ahh what the fuck” What you are doing here?” “Is that how you thank me for helping you?” “Well I didn’t ask for you help I could have handled it myself” “listen I’m not in the mood to argue with you! We’ve been arguing for the past two weeks” “then leave” he took a deep breath and approached you “they’re not bullies!” “Huh what do you mean?” “They’re from a dangerous gang, they’re our rivals and they wanted to kidnap you because you caused injuries to their members last time..So you’re not safe..At least for now” your eyes widened did you just beat up gang members? “What did I get myself into” “exactly! We didn’t know that they’re after you but I guess that’s another reason to make you come with me…i-I’ll protect you” you looked down, the situation is bigger than you thought “ahh I never learn” you said as you hit your head on the wall “I’m *hit* so *hit* stupid” “hey hey stop you’re so weird you know” said Draken placing his hand on your forehead so you wouldn’t hurt your head “I need to go to my house first I need to bring some things” “that means you’re coming right?” you shrugged and said “however I don’t need your protection, I’m able to do it” he rolled his eyes and followed you sneaking into your house so they can’t catch you. “Take this” “huh?” “Wear this for your safety” “who said that I wanna ride your motorcycle?” “Stop being stubborn for once ..can you?” “I rather walk than get on this with you” “okay you wanna act like this then?” You ignored him and started walking but you felt two strong arms lift you up. “DRAKEN PUT ME DOWN NOW” you yelled trying to break from his arms but for nothing. He put you on the motorcycle and forced you to wear the helmet, you huffed in return, giving up, you couldn’t start an argument. He then started the ride, “is this your first time riding a motorcycle?” he asked “y-yes” “then put your arms around my waist or-“ “no I won’t” “listen idiot I’m just trying to get you safe to Mikey or else trust me I wouldn’t care” “so why you saved me from the bull- I mean from that gang?” , it was an awkward silence before he could answer, he didn’t expect a question like this “just for Mikey or else-“ “you wouldn’t care yeah!” you finished his sentence. You slowly circled your arms around his torso but you kept your distance from him, you didn’t push your body on his back and your arms were faintly wrapped around him. “Should I teach her a lesson” said Draken to himself and started the ride at full speed making you panic. You quickly tightened your grip around him and buried your head in his back “slow down you brat aaaaah” you said shutting your eyes, he just smirked enjoying how scared you were. After like 15mins he stopped “here we are” you looked up and realized how close you were, you could feel his defined stomach..that feeling made you blush a bit and you quickly pulled away. You were a bit dizzy from the ride “you almost killed both of us” you said angrily trying to forget about how embarrassing the situation was “where’s the badass (y\n) or you’re being a coward now?” . You started walking with Draken, there were a lot people there when they saw both of you they started bowing. You walked behind Draken who was putting his hands in his pocket; the situation was so awkward you were stealing glances from all direction, holding your bag to your chest.”Ken-chin finally” said Mikey “you must be (y\n)” he added giving you his eye smile. You nodded and smiled a bit “c’mon lets show you the place and let you meet the other” he said excitedly guiding you. “oh Takemichi?” you muttered, finally recognizing someone, his body and face were full of wounds as usual “this man is really a punching bag” you thought to yourself. “so guys this is (y\n)..(y\n) this is Baji captain of first division and that’s Chifuyu the vice-captain…this handsome man over here is Mitsuya the 2nd division captain and this is the vice-captain Hakkai…the others are on a mission one of them is Pah-chin the 3rd division captain..you’ll meet them later” all of them approached you and started shaking your hand “Mikey told us how you saved Takemichi” said chifuyu “you’re so brave!!” added Baji. “They’re friendly not like Draken” you thought to yourself smiling to the boys in front of you then shifting your eyes to glare at Draken. “you must be good friends with Draken..” said Mitsuy. You and Draken looked at each other not sure how to react “trust me she’s the human version of headaches” said Draken “you little shit..no one forced you to come everyday to my house” then again you started bickering as usual. All of the boys were confused and looked at each other like what the hell is going on. Finally Mikey interrupted you “oh guys ehm well I hope you’ll be able to get along cuz you’ll spend more time together” “WHAT?” both of you yelled “yes*smile* Draken you’ll help her in training besides she’ll be with us” “Mikey no, put her in the 2nd divison, I’m sure Mitsuya will do better than me” “you have to work on your relationship as well” added Mikey. Both of you sighed in defeat there’s no way Mikey would change his mind and now you’re stuck together. Mikey wanted to test your fighting abilities again in order to make you stronger. Everyone was there all the captains and the vice-captains “hm what about you fight Ken-chin” said Mikey, not gonna lie you were terrified a bit, Draken is a strong guy and he easily pinned you to the wall several times but you couldn’t show it, you had to be confident especially in front of them, now you’re part of the gang and you have to prove it. You’ll do your best to try and defeat Draken at least throw a proper punch at his face. He walked in the center a cold look on his face…well you realized that it’s actually his natural expression. Your guards were up, your foot positioned to not lose balance “you think you can defeat me?” he said a cocky smile on his face “same question for you…Draken”. And fight, the combat began you successfully dodged his fists, this man didn’t hesitate he was so serious about it. All you did was to dodge his hits, you didn’t attack him, he was so fast, taller and bigger than you but you waited for the right moment. He grabbed your arm and twisted it behind your back while both of you were looking at each other; you frowned and used your knee to hit his stomach, “NICE” shouted Mikey and the others cheering on you. “You’re supposed to cheer on- urgh” said Draken only to receive a punch on his face, he was distracted and didn’t expect your attack.. his face was turned to the other side making him lose his balance, you seized the opportunity and jumped on him making him fall on the ground wrapping your legs around him trying to stop him from moving, in less than a minute he flipped you, your back hitting the hard ground making you growl in pain, and now he was on top of you, used on hand to pin yours on top of your head and the other softly wrapped around your neck, you struggled and kicked your legs everywhere but he was so heavy and slowly you felt your muscles become numb “you give up?” “never” . The boys were impressed despite being pinned on the ground you did your best to fight him and to make him fall. “do you smell something?” said Baji “yeah..a lot of interesting things are about to happen between these two” added Mitsuya. For a moment you got lost in Draken’s eyes, remembering the feeling of his toned body. You shook your head trying to push those thought away “get off of me” you said headbutting him (when you hit someone’s face with your forehead) and quickly you stood up rushing to Mikey “you did well” said Chifuyu patting your head “you’re impressive, you proved yourself by fighting this big bear” said Baji pointing at Draken “tch” is the only thing you received from Drake.. was he mad because you made him fall? You shrugged and continued your chat with the boys without noticing him leave. Days passed and you grew closer to all of the boys especially Mitsuya, he was the one to keep you sane, your bickering with Draken became a daily routine and the others are now used to it, once you start arguing no one can stop you, not even Mikey. Mikey was hopeless but deep down he knows that you care for each other. Even if you don’t realize it, even if you fight everyday, the others can realize how protective Draken is, how he keeps his eyes on you when you’re paired up with someone else but he always deny it, instead he says that enjoys seeing you beaten up by someone else. You, you really thought Draken hates you, because he was forced to instruct and train you. At first you weren’t allowed to join them in fights they wanted to make sure you’re able to defend yourself without getting seriously injured. But after a lot of intense training that lasted for a month without forgetting the support you’ve received from all of them. Now you’re fully capable. “(y\n) I have something for you” said Mikey holding a bag “what is it?” “as you know you’ll participate in the next mission that’s why you need a uniform right?” Mikey and Draken saw how you’re eyes lit up and how you held your hands together to your chest waiting for Mikey to show you the uniform. “Tada” you gasped when you saw it, it was similar to theirs but a bit girlish. “C’mon put it on ..We’ll wait you out there” you grabbed the uniform quickly changing into it. It hugged your body perfectly, you lifted your hair up in a ponytail and put on your fav boots and headed out to join the others. The moment you stepped out all the eyes fell on your figure. You smiled in satisfaction “wow” said Mitsuya “you look so gorgeous” he added taking your hand spinning you. All of them made comments on how beautiful and how the uniform suited you perfectly. But Draken kept his distance looking at you without making any comment; he didn’t even tease you as usual or insult you. You looked at him and your eyes met, you were about to say something but he turned his back and left. You felt your heart ache a bit, why would he do that? You didn’t do anything wrong to him to earn his hate. Your expressions changed and looked down. Everyone else noticed how upset you were but only a few knew that it was because of Draken. You excused yourself and followed Draken. “Draken” you yelled searching for him, he vanished. You got enough of his behavior and attitude towards you. You wanted to make everything clear and talk it out with him. You were busy searching…everywhere. “Oh look who’s here” but before you can turn around you got hit on the back of your head making you fall down unconscious.*Time skip* “hey hey wake up” said someone slapping your face. Your vision was a bit blurry becoming clear slowly. Your head was spinning. You tried to stand up but you couldn’t as your hands and legs were tied to a chair. “Remember me beautiful?” “You asshole” you said trying to get rid of your dizziness. “We will keep you here and tomorrow you’ll go with us to the big fight I’m sure your friends want to see you”. *Meanwhile* “do you think they’re alright?” “maybe they’re arguing again” “Draken can be an asshole sometimes”.. the boys were busy talking about you both when Draken arrived “did someone mention my name?” “ken-chin finally you’re here, you spent a long time out with (y\n)! did you make sure to walk her home?” “(y\n)?” he said clearly confused “b-but we weren’t together” everyone panicked, their eyes widened “s-she went after you when you left” “it was your fault in the first place” said Mitsuya eyes burning with anger, he grabbed Draken by his collar pushing him to the wall “you made her upset, whenever she tries to talk with you, you push her away” “WHAT THE FUCK MITSUYA, OUR RELATIONSHIP IS NONE OF YOUR BUSINESS” “she’s my best friend so it is MY BUSINESS” “best friend you say huh? Because it doesn’t seem like that…both of you look like lovers so stop hiding behind your ‘bestfriend’ thing” “you’re really an asshole Draken” both of them started fighting throwing punches and insults at each other’s faces, everyone struggled to pull them away from each other “STOP BOTH OF YOU” shouted Takemichi “how can you both be so careless about (y\n), do you really care about her?” said Mikey angrily “we don’t know anything about her, she may be caught by that bastard and you’re here fighting over you stupid feelings” exclaimed Baji, both of them looked down realizing their mistakes “instead of running away Draken, you could have talked to her and stop hiding your feelings” said Pah-chin “what feelings” he said looking up, eyes wide and heart racing in his chest, does he really have feelings for you. Questions burned in his throat but he’s the one who have answer he just gotta look deep down…in his heart. “We don’t have time for that we have to go and look for her now”. Everyone rushed ready to get on their motorcycles when someone called Mikey. *On the phone* “Mikey I bet you’re worried as hell now” “you motherfucker where did you take her?” “calm down she’s safe..well for now at leas-“ Draken rushed to Mikey and snatched the phone “if you dare to lay a finger on her I’ll chop your hands off” “oh it’s you vice-president..your little girl is with us..she just needs some punishment for what she’s done to our fighters” “don’t you dare..I’ll end your life” “little girl was looking for you everywhere screaming your name…easy to catch, too distracted that we caught her easily” “I’ll find you and I’ll kill you” “no need to find me, we’ll be at the big fight tomorrow and she’ll come along” then he hung up. Draken’s hands were shaking with anger..his heart almost reaching his throat. “Ken-chin! What did he say?” he was just looking down, thinking about you about the possibility of you getting hurt and it was because of him..Because he was a coward running away from you..running away from his feelings. At that moment he realized how much you’re important to him and how he’s willing to do whatever it takes to keep you safe..was it love?..he realized how his heart skips a bit whenever he sees your face..how he feels like punching something when he sees you with Mitsuya. Was it a coincidence? “no” he said to himself..it was love. “Draken for god’s sake focus” he snapped out of his thoughts, veins popping in his face and neck “he said that he’ll bring her tomorrow to our big fight” Mitsuya approached Draken and said putting his hand on his shoulder “you’re the only one who knows very very well that (y\n) is so strong, she doesn’t give up easily no matter what..stay strong for her” “if something happens to her I’ll never forgive myself”..that’s the first time everyone get to see Draken sad like that..he’s usually strong, never showing his weak side to the point that everyone doubts if he actually has a weakness “we can’t leave her there” said Chifuyu out of the blue “we can’t wait till the morning” “fuck of course we can’t” all the boys gathered setting a plan then all of them rushed to their motorcycles, Mikey gave Draken a comforting smile, squeezing his hand softly “everything will be okay..stay strong ..for her..she needs you the most”. *Meanwhile* “That vice-president was extremely worried about you..haha love birds” “should we touch what’s his this time?” “l-love?...don’t you dare touch me I’LL KILL YOU” you yelled your lungs out. That man approached you slowly his hand grabbing your neck and his nose nuzzled in your ear whispering “shh stay still beautiful we still have a long night ahead” “you fucker you’ll pay for this” he lips now were on your neck sucking on your soft skin…tears streamed down your cheeks “ stop yelling, instead let me hear you moan”. That guy wasn’t planning to do something serious to you he just wanted to give you a hickey for Draken to see, he wanted nothing than to make him suffer. Draken was able to take him down in almost every fight and now he can take his revenge by marking his girl. His lips then moved to your face but you were able to hit him with your forehead..he put his hand on his nose and slapped you. It was the moment Toman arrived..the fight reserved for tomorrow started earlier than it was expected “oh shit” said that guy “how did they find us…come here we need to hide you” you started screaming and bit his hand when he tried to cover your mouth. “leave her alone” said Draken entering the room “ I said leave . her . alone “ gritting his teeth, the guy pushed you making you fall and run towards Draken thinking he stands a chance against him. Draken punched the guy but unexpectedly two others appeared from behind and grabbed Draken’s hands “DRAKEN BE CAREFUL” you yelled “let go of him” “(y\n) are you insane, we came here to save you just go, leave this place” “no Draken please..” you said failing to hold you tears, your nose was bleeding. Draken was unable to move his hand in their strong grip and the other guy held a stick ready to him but you ran and threw yourself in front of Draken receiving the hit. You fell in Draken’s chest, your forehead bleeding you looked up at him and smiled your eyes slowly closing. The Toman joined you there and beat the shit out of the others. “(y\n) wake up please..please” said Draken brushing his shaking fingers against your cheeks a tear fell on his face “let’s take her to the hospital” said Mitsuya..all of them were worried about you. “what’s that is that a-“ Draken’s eyes widened when he saw the hickey, he put you down gently and went to that guy, he was already on the ground, he passed out from all the punches “you dare to touch her and put your filthy lips on her…I swear I’ll smash your face” everyone pulled him away before he could kill him, he probably succeeded in breaking his nose. “guys (y\n)! she’s moving” yelled Chifuyu to be joined by the others “slowly..help her sit” “ahh m-my head” you said holding your head “i-it h-hurts” their eyes softened at your sight. They brought you water and Mikey gave you something sweet to eat so you can gain your energy, luckily he moves around with snacks in his pocket. Baji wiped your blood and tied your hair so you can breathe comfortably. Now you’re fully awake munching on the dorayaki, sitting on the ground “do you feel better?” you hummed in response “did he do something to you, did he touch you?”asked Draken, you shook your head “he tried to kiss my lips but it hit him” his fists are now clenching and kicked the chair making you flinch “damn Draken calm down, she’s safe now” everyone excused themselves to give you privacy so you and Draken can talk. There you were, looking at each other awkwardly “You joining our gang was the biggest mistake that Mikey has ever done” “really Draken? After all of this you’re insisting on insulting me huh? You didn’t get enough of hurting my feelings don’t you?” now your eyes watering, tears threatening to fall again but you aggressively blinked them away. “look at you beaten up and you’re not expecting me to worry about you? That fucker tried to kiss you or maybe even fuck you” “but he didn’t and I’m safe now” “why did you throw yourself like that, why did you receive the hit?” “is this how you thank someone for helping you..tch” “I’m supposed to keep you safe it’s not your job to help me” “and you’re not my bodyguard Draken I’m part of Toman now I believe I fought till the end-“ “you can’t get hurt” “why? Does it matter to you? You hurt my feelings on a daily basis, did you consider that? Ofc not” “I WAS SO FUCKING WORRIED” “WHY DRAKEN WHY WOULD YOU BE WORRIED ABOUT SOMEONE YOU HATE?” “I FUCKING LOVE YOU (y\n)” both of you stopped in tracks, you looked at him in shock, did he just confess his feelings? You thought he hated you “w-what ? D-draken ?” he looked away “yes i-I do” “you idiot all this time I thought you hated me” you said grabbing his collar and gently punching his chest “I felt hopeless and now you didn’t even confess properly…aggressive as always tch” “you’re unbelievable I told you that I love you what I am supposed to do get on one knee?” “save that to the proposal.. you’re really a dumb who acts smart” “p-proposal?” “hey calm down I’m just kidding, gosh “ “no no I promise I’ll propose to you one day” you smiled at his sudden softness “oh you’re being soft now” you teased “you’re really getting on my nerves now…just shut up” “make me” you said smirking…man that drove him crazy he approached you, held your little face in his big hand and planted a kiss on your lips, you growled a bit and then pulled away “what you didn’t like the ki-“ “ no no it’s just I have a cut on my lip so kissing hurts a bit” you said blushing “oh okay I’m sorry” “I didn’t say you can’t kiss me tho” you ended your sentence by pulling him to you, kissing his lips hungrily, you wrapped your arms around his neck, he lifted you up and you wrapped your legs around his torso his arms holding your hips, his lips moved to your neck kissing each part of it and sucking at your skin “you . belong . to . me”, you pulled away trying to catch your breath, your head fell on his shoulder, you hugged him tight and whispered a soft ” I love you too Draken”. He then put you on your feet and walked you to his motorcycle, everyone was waiting for you “guys we heard everything” joked Baji “yeah guys you were really really loud” everyone laughed and you were a blushing mess “ I can’t believe it..that’s what you call a (y\n) effect, Draken you’re really blushing”. After that you went back to Mikey’s house , you told your family that you’ll spend the night with Emma. *At Mikey’s house* “ take off your shirt” said Draken holding the aid kit “why is it bothering you that much?” you teased “just take it off right now” “no why would I do it…em I’m not ready yet” “huh? Isn’t obvious? I have to check your wounds” “oh is that so” you gasped dramatically. “Eventually I’ll see you naked so no need to be shy now”. You slowly took off your shirt but you still have your sports top on. He gently massaged your shoulder and your back and treated each wound carefully, he left soft kisses on the back of your neck. “c’mon lay on bed now, take those pills they’re helpful for your headache” he kissed your temple and held his jacket ready to leave but you stopped him “can you stay here for tonight?” “really?” “yeah ask Mikey if it’s okay to stay over” “..that’s my second house so I don’t need his permission..move to the side a bit” you did as he said then he laid next to you, he pulled the covers up and put his arms on your waist spooning you. Your bodies pressed to each other. Feeling each part of you. He kissed your head and whispered a “sleep tight my little fighter”. Both of fell asleep quickly, after an exhausting evening. Sleeping soundly in each other’s embrace. “shh they’re sleeping” “they’re so cute together” said the boys and Emma as they entered the room, they didn’t expect to see Draken cuddling next to you but it was a cute view the big strong bear being soft and cuddly for the first time. Mitsuya was so happy for both of you, he really considered you as his best friend more like a sister. All of them were extremely happy, finally Draken found his soulmate. All of them are ready to fight for both of you and to protect you and your relationship no matter what. “ah I’m jealous now Draken will be so protective over her, we won’t be able to spend much time with her” Said Takemichi pouting “Nah guys don’t worry (y\n) will always remain Toman’s little fighter.” Said Mikey proudly. All of them spent the night there they even fell asleep in the same room, so when you wake up in the morning don’t freak out when you see all of them sleeping peacefully.
#tokyo revengers#tokyo revengers draken#draken x reader#draken x y/n#tokyo revengers masterlist#tokyo revengers imagines#sano manjiro#baji keisuke#tokyo revengers mitsuya#tokyo revengers chifuyu#chifuyu matsuno#draken oneshot#tokyo revengers fluff#tokyo manji gang#toman x reader#tokyo revengers headcanons#draken headcanons#tokyo revengers mikey
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Strength of the Meek
Carrying a paper bag Dave walks into the cafeteria. He looks around the room and sees Kotzal waving him over. He walks over to him and sits down with Kotzal at a noticeably empty table.
"Hey Dave, how are you?" Kotzal asks with a grin. "You dont have to rub it in, I had no idea you were a natural," Dave grumbles.
"It's just that when you showed me the rules I realized how similar they were to a game I used to play on Geon. Thrum If I remember correctly." Kotzal and dave talk for some time, the topic changes quickly from poker to physical ability.
"How strong are humans anyway? I've seen your movies but you said they aren't a good representation of human strength." Kotzal asks intrigued.
"Were strong enough. Enough to take down something bigger than us, at least with some planning that is." Dave answers. "I mean back when humans still dwelled in caves we took down wooly mammoths, which were beasts around three times the size of a human."
"Oh, I didn't know that. It's pretty impressive to hear." Kotzal says more than intrigued at this point.
"What about when a human has to do something impossible, just to keep the ones they care about alive. What do you do then?" He asks, his face getting a bit more solemn.
"We push on, do whatever it takes, even if it means we tear ourselves apart doing so," Dave says with a look of sincerity. He then breaks the look and smiles warmly. "What's got you asking a question like that?"
Kotzal laughs nervously and scratches the back of his head. "I dont know, I just heard stories over the Ether."
The conversation ends as the buzzer goes off on everyone's watch. "Shit thought we had more time for lunch break. That blows." Dave sighs.
Dave and Kotzal start walking down a hallway towards their respective stations. Halfway towards Dave's station, the alarm sounds, as well as an explosion in a nearby hallway.
"What was that!" Kotzal panics, immediately hiding behind dave and shaking. Dave reacts accordingly, not to the explosion but to Kotzal hiding behind him. "Woah dude, you good?"
"Oh sorry, my species is a prey species on my home planet. We get jumpy when stuff like this happens."
Dave chuckles at the thought, "you know if you did this around the others im pretty sure they wouldn't be able to see you." His attention focuses back on the sound. " We should go check out what happened, we're engineers after all."
Kotzal steps out from behind dave nervously and agrees. They walk down the hallway towards the commotion. Smoke billows out of the walls, embers pour out of the holes as well.
A hulking beast pulls its way out of the hole, it had to be around 8 and a half feet tall. Just as dave gets a look at it, several more come out of the walls. Kotzal grabs dave and pulls him around the corner, away from the beasts.
"Get down! Those are Tarvok pirates. We need to go, we do Not want to pick a fight with those." Kotzal is freaking out, likely having a panic attack. He tries to pull Dave with him. Dave doesn't budge, instead, he stares at the wall and puts his hand on it. "I cant."
Kotzal gets more anxious and frenzied, pulling harder on Dave. "No We have to go, David dont do this." In response, Dave grins and puts his head on the cold metal wall. "I said I cant, This station is my baby. I've fixed her more than anyone else. I can't leave her."
Dave turns to Kotzal and continues. "Not to mention the number of people these guys could hurt. You know how far the nearest guard post is, and how understaffed it is. If I turn tail and run countless people will die. But If I distract them, buy us some time. Maybe I can save a few lives."
"But you'll die! You'll get killed, I can't have you do that. I can't lose you, You're the only one who even respects me, let alone is nice to me." He says as tears start to form in his four eyes.
Daves grin breaks and he pulls Kotzal into a hug, Kotzal's small stature causing him to look like a small child not wanting their parent to leave. "That's not happening. I ain't gonna die." Dave thinks for a moment and goes on. "How about you help me, I dont buy this scared child Schtick. There's something there, something strong. I can see that."
Dave breaks the hug and pulls a knife from his belt, and hands it over to him. Kotzal stares at the blade for a second and takes the knife and nods in agreement. "Use your speed and stature to your advantage. there's a lot of smoke, try to use that."
Dave and total talk for a minute discussing plans and strategies after they're done he grabs a pipe on the wall and rips it off, but not before speaking to the station itself. "Sorry about this."
Walking around the corner Dave bangs the pipe on the wall, getting the army of Tarvok's attention. "Hey you brutes, eyes on me." He says, resting the pipe on his shoulder.
One of the Tarvok's starts walking over to Dave with a look of hunger and anger. Dave grins, this being a part of his plan, and stomps on a jagged and sharp piece of metal, launching it into the air. To which Kotzal leaves cover from behind Dave and grabs the piece of metal and throws it into the eye of the Tarvok.
"See, I told you no one would be able to see you back there." Dave jokes. He takes a step forward and inspects the now corpse of the Tarvok. "Oh damn, straight into the eye." Kotzal meekly responds to the compliment. "Thanks, it was heavier than Im used to so I didn't think it hit where I wanted to."
"You're a good shot, keep it up." Dave compliments. For a split second, Dave swore he could see Kotzal's cheeks turn blue.
Dave starts walking forward towards the rest of the army, beckoning them to come to fight him. One soldier takes a step forward to fight. The hulking beast throws a punch towards Dave but he sides steps it and slams his weapon into a pipe next to the Tarvok.
The soldier notices this and started to laugh but a second later the pipe bursts and hot steam starts to burn the soldier and causing it to fall to the floor.
The next one rushes Dave and throws a punch at him, he absorbs the blow into his shoulder and uses the force to spin himself around and slam the pipe into the soldier's skull.
At the display of force, the rest of the Tarvok's take a step back from the carnage. "Hey Kotzal, I think I fucked my shoulder up. It's your turn. " Dave says quietly so the brutes in front of them won't hear. "Yeah, let's do it." He responds, trying to hide the fear in his voice.
Dave starts to run towards the group of Tarvok's with Kotzal following. Before he gets too close he ducks down and arches his back and Kotzal jumps off his back and launches himself toward the enemy.
With one hand he throws a sharp piece of metal in the neck of one of the soldiers and with the other he stabs another with the knife Dave gave him.
The last one is in front of them, he's bigger than the rest. Probably the leader. "Let me handle this one," Dave says as he blocks Kotzal from moving forward with the pipe.
Looking at the pipe in his hand, Dave realizes that the pipe is way too damaged to continue to be useful. He takes a step forward and throws the thing as hard as he can. The pipe flies through the air and when it's about to hit, the leader catches it.
As soon as he threw the pipe Dave started running towards the beast but only noticed that he caught the pipe when he was too close to do anything. The Leader propels his knee into Daves's gut, the spike on it spearing into dave.
"Oh fuck!" He screams as the spike goes through him. He falls back and tries to stop the bleeding. Another scream is heard, not of pain but rage. "You Fucker!" It's Kotzal, with the look of pure rage in his eyes.
"I'll kill you!" He screams as he starts running towards him. As he reaches him he jumps at the leader to get a clear shot at him. In retaliation, the Tarvok grabs him by the neck and holds him in the air. Kotzal doesn't seem to notice, the anger blinding him. He starts slashing wildly at the beast in front of him, a good majority hitting their targets.
Kotzal gets a good stab into the arm of the beast holding him, causing him to be dropped.
While on the ground he stabs the blade into the back of the knee of the Tarvok leader making him fall to his knees, lining him up for a stab to the side of his head, killing him.
He keeps stabbing the now dead Tarvok, more out of rage than him being unsure he's dead. After a few dozen stabs he stops and takes a second to breathe and remembers Dave. He turns around and sprints towards Dave.
He starts trying to help him staunch the bleeding and stabilize him. "No, no-no-no. Dont do this, you cant." He starts tearing up trying to help him.
"It's okay, you did well. Didn't expect the fucker to catch the pipe. I think this is it" Dave says as he rests on the wall, trying to do whatever he can to stop the bleeding.
"Dont say that! You'll be fine, I know what im doing. I can help you." Kotzal says frantically.
Dave looks at him and puts his bloodied hand on his shoulder. "You can't save me, an injury like this is impossible to fix up."
"Shut up!" Kotzals shouts as he slaps dave. "We aren't in the medical dark ages, You know how strong modern medicine is." a grin forms on Daves face as he shrugs. "Whatever you say," he says as his vision fades to black and passes out.
Daves eyes open and the bright light blinds him, "hey your awake." a familiar voice says. His eyes adjust to the light and he sees that Kotzal is sitting on the chair next to his bed.
Dave groans in pain as he tries to sit up. Kotzal puts a hand on his shoulder and stops him. "Dumbass, you can adjust the bed." He laughs, handing him the switch.
"How long was I out?" He asks as he raises the head of his bed. "About two days. You had us worried for a little while." Kotzal responds with a smile.
"You can't kill me that easily, its gonna take a lot more than that, I still have work to do here." He smiles back.
"Oh yeah, like what?" Kotzal asks. "The engines been making a thunking noise for the past week, I still figure out what the hell the problem is." They both start laughing for a minute and after they stop a silence is formed between them, which is promptly broken ten seconds later by dave. "Hey after they discharge me, do you wanna go to the bar and get a few drinks? I'll buy."
"Sure thing, I'd love to."
#Aliens#humans are terrifying#humans are space orcs#writing#MY OCs#my wrtiting#oc#oc character#frienship#sci-fi#writerscommunity
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last post AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA
THEY TALK TEHY TALK THEY TALK THEY TALK THJEYYYY >:D
HRLP.. casually asking his age that means that sirius couldve been waiting for dorothy for 10+ years.. damn THE “SO YOUNG” OK 500 YR OLD the only reason im not changing his name to old man is bc emo boy fits him more rlly like seeing them interact.. everybody here so interesting with each other
ALSO YEAH EXACTLY. it throws me off because ashe seems a lot more emotional in this one bro if hes still living in the past smacks ashe so much angst can fit in this bitch FLAHSBACK TIME!!!! i realized thgat its less the crystal and more him just replaying memories?? or its zooming more in on him idk its just my own take i guess someone hug him it feels like he isnt over whatever happened at all THE PIANO PLAYING PART HAHSAHDWQH “i guess this is my fate??” PIANO PLAYING ASHE WHEN calling it right now i think that she died in a fire somehow not from her illness. maybe. maybe
WAY I GRIMACED AT THIS LINE..............................
claire noticing devleopment i love her
even if its really scaring me right now okay that was precious even if it was really depressing ashe therapy speedrun challenge GO! im glad they get to genuinely talk in this one it feels a lot more different with whats going to happen and tbh im living for it
good luck ashe i guess i really still wanna hug you they wouldnt grant it anyway. its a good wish and demons dont grant goodness and even if he did get his wish he still would never be the same because of how brutally he killed a person to get it and i dont think his family is really as healthy as he says or thinks they are it feels a lot like denial OKAY HELL YES FINAL DAY FLASHBACK TIME
its such a good family
WAIT HOLKY SHIT. RICHARD DID YOU DO THIS PROBABLY NOT NO HE LET HIM KNOW BUT HOLY SHIT
THIS IS SO WHY WOULD YOU EVEN DO THIS??????????? I FEEL SO BAD FOR ASHE NONE OF THIS WAS EVEN DESERVEDI DONT GET IT THE WAY HE WOULDVE HURRIED STRAIGHT INTO THERE AND PROBABLY WOUDLVE DIED AS WELL IF PEOPLE DIDNT HOLKD HIM BACK THATS JUST CRUEL AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA
FUCK YOU FUCK YOU FUCK YOU EWHGGSWGHGWHHHWHGWHWHW I HATE MATTY
DUDE. I GET IT. COMPARISONS SUCK ASS BUT THAT WAS HIS ENTIRE FAMILY HE EVEN TRIED TO HELP YOU THIS IS MESSED UP SO HE JUST ENDED UP HAVING BREAKDWONS AND DOING ALL OF THIS ITS NOT THAT I DONT FEEL SYMPATHY FOR EVERYTHING HES HAD TO DEAL WITH BUT HES RUINED SO MANY LIVES JFC the. thd resemblance with that face and the other faces he hallucinated on the others. what the fuck.
it isnt his fault he was just trying to help lillian the amount of survivors guilt ashe must be feeling right now. that’s families and even your family carrying on your back. what the hell matty. getting burned to death is one of my worst fears and the way that this just happened so easily and his family could do nothing about it and all ashe could do was stare and struggle and watch this isnt his fault at all its mattys fault for being so careless with other peoples lives or it could just be noones fault but UGGHHHJHJHEUIYU this is just too messed up. no wonder ashe can’t accept it and is so desperate
ashe
i dont blame him for reacting like that at all. he had his entire life burn before him and just clung to the thing that couldve helped him get it back
the way that limes just in awe of how dead inside he looks i cant get over this woah richard trying to reach out to him. that’s sweet but he’s too buried in his own mind
how long has he been doing this. long enough to grow a huge braid i guess
dude i cant take this i didnt exit out and just go speechless but i still died the fact that ashe in all of these try again try agains just kills claire over nad over hes done so much for his family and im sure that when he found out killing claire was what he had to do next his mind just thought of that as the next goal to do to get everything he wanted back i guess when he started laughing and stuff when he killed claire im taking this from reaper it was more based on adrenaline and the thought that he could finally have a good ending and not need to face the reality that everything he’s worked up to at this point + how he left his entire life behind for this + how one of his childhood best friends who he thought he could trust and tutor just full out backstabbed him by setting up the fire for certain deaths in the first place would all just crush him and hes justnjhjkhkj ashe deserved so much better. they all desevred so much better with the cards they were dealt and honestly? they all could take the witch’s heart and use it for a reasonable purpose i really like ashe. the actions he has done to achieve what he’s trying to do im sure hasn’t been pleasant or morally good but he’s desperate and doesn’t want his life to slip him by like that when it’s already too late he’s stuck himself on the stage of denial so deep that even if he does go back he won’t ever be completely healed im sure the thought scares him as well anyway good game. goodcharacter i feel so empty and im bad at essays but im sure thge feelings will hit me hard later on another note
i love how shocked charlotte is at claire’s genuine kindness and sympathy. i think that makes a good dynamic with her and claire jokes on you bitch youre talking to the softest angel and you dont even know
charlotte has a point but being heartless is just something that claire wouldnt do tbh
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Number 1 | K. Bakugou |
idk what this is man, an origin story maybe?? idk bakugou is an asshole and reader is a badass
The ratings where in, this is it, the big moment. After years of hard work and dedication, you’re finally about to find out if you made it the number Number 1 Hero Spot. You walk out on the stage with the other Top 5 heroes, one being your long term boyfriend, Bakugou. You’d been dating since highschool and worked at the same agency that he created.
“And for our number 2 Hero, we have...Ground Zero! Number 1... Angel! Thank you heroes for protecting and sacrificing your lives for us!” The announcer practically yelled at the large crowd of people.
You couldn’t believe it. You did it. You were the number 1 hero in all of Japan and your boyfriend was right behind you. The lights of the stage felt like power surging through your body. Your large white wings fluttered in excitement. You took your place at the number one podium and felt warm tears of joy stream down your face, you feel pata on your back and can hear congratulations swirling around but you can barely stand up straight.
Soon someone hands you a microphone, the crowd quieting down.
“Thank you all so much, I will work hard every single day until my body gives up to make sure this great nation is protected. I’ve worked very hard to get here so thank you all for recognizing my hard work and determination. I wanna thank Ground Zero, for being the best partner and for helping me get where I am. It won’t be easy but I will take this number 1 spot and wear it with pride. Thank you, i love you all” You spill out happily, you turn and grab onto Katsuki, hugging him and congratulating him on Number 2. You’d both climbed so high and so quickly since you’re UA days, it’s made you happy that you’ve come so far with the person you love most.
Bakugou however, didn’t look happy. It was extremely rare to see a smile on his face, but at the very least you’d expected his bored face. But now, he looked angry. He looked like he was ready to level the city withy he scowl pressed on his face.
“babe, what’s wrong? you good?” You grab his large bicep, getting him to look at you. His bright red eyes snap to yours and you feel locked in with how much animosity they hold.
“I’m ready to go home” He spits out before turning and walking back to the car you’d both arrived in.
You took a few more pictures with fans before following your grumpy boyfriend. As soon as you sat in the car, you could feel the tension thick in the air.
“Ok seriously babe, what the hell is wrong? We got the top spots, that’s amazing!” You turn towards him as the driver head back to your place.
“It’s nothing” He managed to say through his teeth with his are locked together with how tight he’s clenching his jaw.
“It’s something, you’re getting ready to blow this car up”
“I said it’s nothing, Angel” He speaks, the name oozing in malice and anger. Suddenly it clicked.
“You’re jealous that I got the number one spot while you got number two. jesus christ katsuki, could you be any more pessimistic. Why can’t you just be happy for me that i’ve reached a goal i’ve been trying to get my whole life? Number two is in no way shape or form bad.” You huff and fall back against the seat, you watch Bakugou clench and unclench his fists while staring out the window.
“I have to be number one and be better than All Might” He growls quietly, you knew it was a somewhat sensitive subject, but you couldn’t believe your ears.
“All might? Katsuki, you’re 23 years old, you can’t truly expect to be better than All Might right now? All might wasn’t even this good at this age yet, you’re way ahead of schedule. You can’t be happy for me because you wanna be better at 22 years old than All Might was in his prime? You’re delusional katsuki.”
“I HAVE TO BE NUMBER ONE”
“THATS FINE BUT WHY CANT YOU BE HAPPY THAT TOUR GIRLFRIEND IS NUMBER ONE?”
“BECAUSE IT SHOULD BE ME”
“so you think I don’t deserve this katsuki? You think what? I haven’t worked hard enough? I’m nor strong enough? I’m not good enough? WHAT IS IT KATSUKI? Why don’t I deserve to be number one? Why do you think your were unfairly judged?”
You both stared at each other in silence for a while, anger boiling into the atmosphere. You understood the only thing that drove bakugou in highschool was his need to be number one. You were both adults now, and you were in love with each other. You’d hoped that you’d made a big enough impact on bakugou that your life and love together would be enough of a motivator to be great, the way it was with you.
You felt that car pull into your large home, and immediately jumped out, racing up to your shared bedroom. You got out of your hero costume and into leggings and a tank top. You took off all your makeup and picked the confetti out of your wings. You looked up as Bakugou walked in the room.
“Im not sorry that I’m not settling for number two, I never will and you know it, but i am sorry for yelling at you and the way I acted.” Katsuki grumbled while looking at the floor. Usually, his awkward and hesitant apologies warmed your heart and made you gush at how cute your angry boyfriend was, but now you find yourself staying angry.
“That’s not an apology katsuki. You refuse to be happy for me, even though you promised you would be. You refuse to even acknowledge how much work I put into this to be number one. I am THE youngest Hero to hit number one and you can’t even say good job babe. Instead you get angry and jealous and mean because it wasn’t you. Never mind the fact that you jumped from 10 to 2 which is THE biggest jump anyone’s seen in years bakugou. You won’t even let yourself be happy at what you’ve done, because you’re too busy being jealous” You poke his chest, finally standing in front of him.
“It’s not a bad thing to want to be the best” He crosses his arms, getting defensive.
“Of course not babe, I want you to be the best too. So why don’t you want me to be the best?”
“It’s not that, it’s-“
“It’s what Katsuki?”
“I made a promise to myself-”
“YOU MADE A PROMISE TO ME KATSUKI. You gave me this fucking promise ring and told me that you you’re gonna support me no matter what. That we were gonna work hard to get to where we need to go and we were gonna do it together. You promised me you’d be by my side. That’s the difference between us babe. You need to be number one for yourself, I need to be number one for us. You’ve forgotten that” You wipe your tears and move around the tall man in your way. It hurt that Katsuki couldn’t see this was bigger than his highschool days. This was your life together. You hadn’t spoken to All Might or even Midoriya in years, so why was it so hard for him to accept you as a permanent part of his life.
“Baby, i’m sorry I just. I get one track minded and I was so hopeful that this was finally the day. I needed so bad to be number one-“
“THIS IS NO LONGER ABOUT BEING NUMBER ONE KATSUKI, THIS IS ABOUT HOW YOU CANT SEE THAT YOURE TREATING ME LIKE A SIDE CHARACTER. I AM YOUR GIRLFRIEND!! For fucks sake katsuki, we live, work, sleep, eat do and do everything together, so the fact that I’m not even one of the reasons you go out and do what you do hurts because this” You pause and gestured to everything around you. “This is the reason I wake up every morning, you are the reason I fight crime and your reason is, a childhood rivalry. You’re am adult now, you’re supposed to be friends with midoriya and all might and you’re supposed to be over this whole thing. This isn’t supposed to be the thing that drives you. I’m not saying I have to be too of the list but it would be nice to be on the list” You sigh and look at your boyfriend. You knew this wasn’t healthy to yell at each other like this, but you needed him to understand where you’re coming from.
“Baby, Of course you’re my reason for waking up and being a hero, I would do anything to protect you, it’s just I always pictured me at Number 1 with my agency and you and a family. I have a need, a primal urge to be number one and that’s never going to change. Doesn’t mean i don’t love your dumbass”
“Well I’m number one Katsuki, and I earned the hell out of it. I worked my ass off day and night for weeks and months and years so that I could have this. And to see you pout and complain and look me in my face and tell me you don’t think I deserve this spot hurts more than some cute little apology where you call me dumbass lovingly. So i’ll ask you again, why don’t you think I deserve this spot? What makes you better?” You squinted your eyes at the tall man and clench your jaw.
“Im physically stronger-“ You interrupt your boyfriend by grabbing his arm and kicking his legs out from under him, using your wings to flip him over in his back, pinning him down.
“You’re so close minded katsuki, that you don’t even know what i’ve. been doing for the past 8 months. I an the number one hero you think i didn’t train to be stronger than everyone around me?” You ask, hurt laced in your voice.
“Fine, you deserve this spot. You’re the best.”
“You dont meant that, I’m gonna make you fucking mean it Katsuki. One day you’re gonna see me and i’m gonna be the best and you’re gonna be in awe of my power and then you’ll finally see that i deserve this.” You push off of him and stand up your wings tucking close to your body.
“Just-give me a week babe. I promise I’ll make it up to you and I’ll show you I am happy for you, it’s just difficult being let down like this. I’m a sore loser and you know it.” Bakugou grabs your shoulder and pulls you close to his chest.
“You haven’t even said you’re proud of me yet. or that you love me. or even good job katsuki. You don’t believe i’m your heart that i deserve this do you?” You look at him, heart in your throat.
“I believe I should be number one. Every time.” Katsuki mutters in your hair like it was a compliment. You push him back, rage filling your body.
“You’re fucked up katsuki. I’m fucking leaving” You spit, throwing on a jacket and shoes, heading towards your front door.
“Where the hell are you going?!” Bakugou snarls as you move past him.
“Katsuki, I love you with every fiber of my soul, but right now looking at your face makes me wanna throw you across town and beat the shit out of you. I’ll be back tomorrow maybe” You mumble the last part, not really sure how long you wanna be away from your hot headed boyfriend.
“you can’t just fucking leave y/n, how do you expect to be number one of you can’t even stay and win a fight against your boyfriend.” Katsuki let’s out a dry laugh, causing you to turn away from your front door.
You lunge at Katsuki, ready to punch him until he understands you’re the number one hero. You two roll around fighting and spewing things typically reserved for villains. Bakugou pins you down on the floor, his knee on your chest and his hands holding both your wrists beside your head. You close your eyes and focus all your energy into your chest, a faint ball of white light glows from your heart. Ktsuki looks at it with realization before the energy is expelled from you and your boyfriend is sent flying across the living room.
“You did not just use Power Surge on me.” He growls. wiping the sweat from his brow.
“I did, and i’m fucking leaving and your not gonna say shit or so help me god katsuki, i will shoot a beam of light so bright and hot that you wake up blind, burnt and fucking single.” You use your wings to send you flying straight to your front door, you look back at your confused boyfriend once more before taking to the sky.
Bakugou began the cleaning process, shocked and confused. Why didn’t you understand he wants to be happy for you, he truly does, but his pride won’t let him get away with not winning. He decided to let you fly off to calm down for the night, opting to call and talk to Kirishima. The two friends ended up talking for a bit longer than expected, bakugou trying to get kiri on his side, not his girlfriends. It didn’t work however, Kirishima understood that bakugou would let his emotions cloud his mind, even when it came to you. By the end of the conversation, bakugou was almost has heated as he was while fighting you. He concluded the best option was to head to his agency and train for the night.
He arrived and decided to do some things around the office before heading to the training and workout wing of his large building. While going thru last minute files, there’s a knock on his door.
“Ground Zero, i wasn’t expecting you to be here so late.” A stranger smiles in Bakugou face as he opens his office door, his secretary smiling sheepishly.
“Who the hell are you?” He cocks his head and tries to figure it out before he’s told, one of those weird habits he’s picked up being a hero.
“My apologies. I’m Niko Takeyama, I work for the Hero Commission. How would you like to be the number one hero by this time next month.”
#bnha imagines#bnha x reader#mha fanfiction#bakugou smut#bakugou imagine#katsuki bakugo imagine#mha bakugou#bakugou x reader
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I just like really need to get this off my chest, so please. I don't care if you're just gonna read this but I'm so sick so I just wanna let it all out
ever since online started, my first thought was: yay! no more school. cause I thought it'd be easier for me. news flash, I was completely fucking wrong. for the last, what? two years my mental health has been crashing down, sometimes there's times where I think: oh. this is actually okay, I think I'm gonna be fine but then the next moment I'm bawling my eyes out about something I never wanted to live my life doing.
school sucks. it took me years, semester after semester to get used to it. my first year was horrible, I was behind everything. I ignored everything, I procrastinated my works and I thought when it was finally time to pass them: I'll never get past this. but im here, somehow I'm here and yet again I'm facing another wall. i feel hopeless again. and this year. it's the most hopeful I've been, I've been better. so much better than this is the first time I've ever been truly proud of myself. but now I don't know anymore.
my grades came and I'm ashamed to say they aren't high, funny how I'm insecure even about a few numbers thats supposed to decide my life course.
it's unhealthy but when I face things like this, the only thought I had was how much I wanted to die. im humiliated of myself because I'm so fucking pathetic, I can change my life right now but I can't and i don't even know why. it's funny cause i keep telling my freind that I'll kms but I'm still alive, cause im too young. and i don't know how to disappear. I'm trying to stay alive because for once, I want to be good in something that no one will ever surpass me in.
my mom's facing me right now, she's laughing. I can see that she's holding in her laughs at the face of my tears. she's comforting me but I can't take her words to heart. it goes out of one ear and out of the other.
and as much as I love everyone I've met with all my heart, my freinds, I love them so much and I appreciate them. but sometimes I feel so lonely because no one has ever said nice things to me, to validate my feelings, but I was okay because I was always used to being left with my thoughts and just passing one of it with a few jokes. I hate that no one was ever willing to ask me: "are you okay? do you wanna talk about it?" without me asking for it first. maybe some people did ask me about it, I cant remember. thank you for them.
even if I did receive one of them. I probably chose to brush it off. god I make no sense right now.
to the strangers, people, online and irl freinds I have. I'm so sick, my best freind. I always played as someone she could trust, I hate that I'm talking to her behind her back rn but I couldn't fucking careless right now because I can't tell if I'm just on my period. whenever I rant to her about topics I'm interested in (an anime, genshin, just topics I love) she always just sends one worded replies like "what" or "okay" one time she even told me that she couldn't give a shit about things she didn't know about. a few days ago, idk when. she asked to rant about her book, which of. I didn't even know about. I told her "sure. do you even have to ask?" and then I let her send me lengthy messages, I even made comments about it.
I'm so sick telling other people the exact same words that I want to hear.
okay let's put it simply. I'm the therapist friend, I always wanted to take psychology. I'm the girl that asks google on how to comfort someone so I can provide better comfort. I'm selfish for wanting to be comforted myself but who the hell am I anyways? I don't have a lot of irl freinds, sometimes in online I feel isolated cause I don't really ever fit in. I'm not pretty, I know I can be smart if I actually put in the effort and if I wasn't so lazy, I'm not rich, in fact my family isn't very wealthy. I look at other people and the only thing I can do is stare in envy because I can never get it.
I don't know how to make myself look good, I don't know shit about makeup, I don't even know anything about basic information I'm supposed to do. I know I won't able be ever let outside my house to hang out with friends because my parents are strict.
I hate that all my friends are better than me in one way or another. I always thought to myself: I want to live another life. because i was truly, upset, and unhappy in this one. no matter how many times I feel happy there's always gonna be something that's gonna drag me down again.
when I finally choose to open up to my parents, the thing they always do is laugh at me. they treat my words like it's a joke, maybe it's just a common reaction but I'm sensitive. that sounds oddly like a pick me but I want to be honest with my feelings without using jokes to dismiss it.
I love them, but I hate them because they always choose to try and force my feelings out of me. they threaten to take away my phone when I dont talk to them and it's exhausting to talk about something that I don't wanna talk about to someone like them.
I'm tired. I'm tired of being a big sister, I'm tired of being a daughter, I'm tired of being a freind, and I'm so fucking tired of living. it sucks.
I'm so tired of being yelled at because I didn't have the energy to finish a school work that I didn't want to do in the first place. I'm tired of being called that it's my fault for having a bad grade. I'm so fucking tired of putting up with everything. I'm so tired that I'm always the one being blamed when my brother does something wrong. I'm so tired of never really having anything for myself because if I ask for something it will only burden my family, so I'd be content with everything I have even if it isn't a lot as long as I'd be able to do the stuff I love.
"it will pass", I believe that saying but I just want it to end right now. I don't want it to pass. it sucks that I can't do anything right now. all I can do is drag myself to my desk and let a bunch of things confuse me. everything I do, it always ended in disaster. as much as i hate to say it, it really is all my fault.
my parents stay silent but I can't tell if their silence is worse then when they're scolding or screaming to me about something. I hate them so much because of the non-existent psychological pressure and torture they put me through. I lie to them, just so I can save myself from that again.
for now. I'll just force myself to not play anything until I finish every single fucking thing. I don't care if I end up staying up for days but who cares anyways? I just hoped my parents would've let me down slowly instead of blaming it all on me on one go. I sound so edgy rn. honestly there's a lot more but i don't have the energy anymore. this prolly means I won't post for a while. thanks. bye.
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top 5 scenes/episodes/arcs that deserved horriblebreakdownnatural go!
OKAY MICKEY I DID THINK ABT THIS A LOT and these are Not in any particular order but i have thoughts SO (below the cut bc its long)
1. sometime in s2 (after having met max for sure like seeing his powers be used for something violent & learning he also has psychokinetic abilities) sam shouldve had a full meltdown about his powers this is a PRIVATE MELTDOWN he goes to the woods or smth in the middle of the night and just loses it. full screaming at the sky “what the FUCK is HAPPENING TO ME” yes his psychic abilities would act up during this display and he would cause like. a crop circle or knock over trees and that would freak him out even more so hes like crying and trying to calm down because he’s terrified of what will happen if he Doesnt calm himself down. there’s a lot of choking down tears here because he just wants to be fucking normal, he tried so hard, and he has no idea what the hell is inside of him. he slips back into the motel before sunrise and dean never finds out about this one. like this post was Correct
2. okay this is SIMILAR but not the same hear me out. PRE swan song, as in the night between dean agreeing that sam can say yes and try to fling himself into the pit and it actually happening, sam shouldve been able to fully lose it. because holy fuck???? what the goddamn fuck is this? this breakdown potentially all happens at bobby’s house once again alone - he goes out to the scrapyard and looks up at the sky and prays to god to help him, asks why this is happening to him, why god wont do anything. please. please. there is, of course, no answer. this is sam’s last night as sam, and if things go well he’ll spend the rest of eternity locked in hell with lucifer; i think he’s entitled to a little screaming and crying and desperation
3. i gotta say like. fitz was right on the money with a post soul-fixed sam dean having a complete and utter meltdown like this. its just like......sam couldnt process for so long and dean was absolutely repressing everything for the year he lived with lisa and ben and to truthfully recognize what sam went through and everything.....horriblebreakdownatural MUST include both of them having a very late night hazy crying fit because once DEAN starts crying about how he never shouldve done it he shouldve said yes to michael or found another way sammy oh god you were so good im ao sorry you did it but i shouldve protected you i shouldve protected you then sam would also cry i think. they need this. its catharsis
4. i personally think dean should have had a breakdown after learning that mary was a hunter. not then and there in the past because goddamn no time (hah), but there’s no fucking way he would’ve been able to cope with thee mother mary, angelic perfect figment of comfort and home, the pure martyr for whom his entire life was ruined, was actually. a killer. a hunter. and she hated it. i think maybe he would be telling sam about it and it would hit suddenly and he would just feel sick, this is the kind of breakdown where you’re throwing up bile and you cant catch your breath and maybe youre crying?? but thats not the point its the absolute crushing weight and sickness when you learn that someyhing in your life has irrevocably changed in the worst way
5. cry harder repression boy: i want that tearful horrible painful breakdown from dean that we were all waiting for after despair. when he processes what cas said? and what that MEANS? oh i wanted the full breakdown here. this isnt something he can drink away because cas is fucking DEAD and cas loved him, he’s deaf Because he loved dean, like. i think that it would be jack asking where cas was that would actually seal this particular breakdown deal and dean would have to flee to go privately lose his shit which is of course not that private. think a prayer like purgatory 2.0 but 20x more desperate, which turns into threatening chuck because rage is the natural companion to grief
honorable mentions: sam after expelling gadreel (this would be horrible. imagining sam sobbing about killing kevin is genuinely making me ill), dean after leaving cas in purgatory (a prayer that turns to desperate painful screaming at the sky which sam hears but they never talk about), dean after getting cas BACK from purgatory (to cas), sam learning that he’s lucifer’s true vessel, at some point i think dean or sam shouldve had a car meltdown (u know screaming at the top of your lungs while barelling down the highway, crying, lots of obscenities).....theres def more but these simply came to mind. feel free to share w me your epic horriblebreakdownatural moment suggestions
#maybe these are dumb i just wanted to see them absolutely lose their shit#i have a note in my phone abt the second one.....#kora.txt#asks#gayofficial#pal tag#thank u sarah!!!!#long post#emeto tw
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