#maybe hes just built different >_>
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Why would you—That's not—I just wanted to ask for help, why did you have to go and make it awkward???
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#poorly drawn mdzs#mdzs#wei wuxian#xue yang#Its such a relief to not have to draw so many characters once again.#Redrawing the specific font from the English translated mdzs books was surprisingly fun!#Maybe I'm alone in this...but I think characters switching to a different font of speech for *emphasis* is peak comedy#you can't communicate voice changes of sound very well in non audio forms so this is the best I can do.#Anyways...rip Xue Yang. You finally meet your idol and he brushes you off#Rather— he doesn't live up to the expectations you built in your head#Kind of an on going issue there Jester (I refuse to call him king or sir)#XY is constantly making people out to be the versions he needed them to be to feel justified in his actions#but struggles to pivot when confronted with the fact that these ppl are *more* than just one surface reading!#wwx doesn't actually think xy is flirting. He's just tired of all the fake fans + wants to get out of this convo.#button mashing the A button to skip the unskippable cutscene#Lan Wangji is in the next comic btw. I've missed him dearly. I'm sorry he's been gone so long </3#edit: poorly spelt MDZS strikes again. This is why I need more time to write my comics. So I can actually proofread B*(#edit2: I cast 'Power of Technology' and fixed my error. Everyone reblog this version instead please
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I just skimmed through the art part of your blog and holy bajeebus your LMK art is so beautiful and the headcanon ideas you come up with are so good I wanna steal em-
Kinda wanna see like a part 2 of the little angst you did between MK and Macaque a while ago. It's so interesting and I wanna see Macaque's reaction in your art style. (You don't have to of course, it's just a suggestion [idk if i spelled that right])
Thanks for reading and hope you have a good day/night!
Hope this is to your liking ^^
Part one here
#I’m sure there are some character nuances im forgetting but well 🤷🏽#I want their misunderstanding or whatever they have going on between then come to a head. literally just going ‘wait what’#for me I think it’s entirely possible that there was an actual fight and maybe tension leading up to that point#cause I feel like macaque is not just bitter about thinking he died to wukong but maybe some stuff that built up to that#maybe the fight was just the breaking point. maybe they’re idiots who don’t talk about it because they think they’re on the same page idk#chipper-smol wrote a cool theory abt them using macaques ‘you’re nothing’ line in s4ep1. from what I understand it could be a direct parall#parallel to when he said that to MK right before MK regained his nerve and hit macaque in the eye.. since flying bark foreshadowed monkey mk#waaaay back in season 1 (where his shadow is his monkey form in the opening) i think that could be deliberate#and they could have gotten billy to voice an entirely different line for that scene. but they reused his line from s3#in a very specific scene with wukongs narrative foil. hm#that aside I would have liked to hear billy voice the ‘you abandoned me’ line that would have killed me. but that’s just me lol#also looking at this I should have shaded the last frame to make it look more dramatic and serious but I ran out of time :(#if anything I want to see MK try and help them get back together. poor kid tries so hard to understand people so I think it would be cool to#see that happen. that’s what I like about him.. he asked macaque why he was working for LBD instead of accusing him of dooming everyone bc#he wants to and he tried to comfort spider queen by admitting he was scared of LBD too 😭😭#my art#myart#Lego Monkie kid#lmk#Monkie kid#lmk spoilers#Lego Monkie kid spoilers#lmk macaque#six eared macaque#lmk sun wukong#lmk swk#lmk MK#lmk xiaotian#lmk season 4#Lego Monkie kid s4
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can't believe herbert told gruber that he was like a father to him and that he really appreciates him and then the dude shoots up with their reagent right after and his face basically explodes in front of herbert like the poor guy must've been so traumatize like you wonder why he spends all of his time conducting research into perfecting his reagent like if bro ever took a minute to try to chill and gather his thoughts after everything he’s been through he'd probably start to spiral
#or maybe he’s just built different???#lmao#ramblings#source for that first part about herberts feelings towards gruber is the reanimator novelization btw#but like idk man its just gotta be hard watching someone you look up to die in such a horrific manner#like ya his health was already declining#and the results helped a bit#but witnessing that mustve been horrible for herbert#but he is a scientist and science prevails i guess#reanimator#re animator#re-animator#herbert west#dr herbert west
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The thing is... Ace has the same parents as Rimmer.
When he became successful, what do we think happened to their relationship?
Did they love him and treat him like they did his brothers, or even better? Did they still not see him as good enough? Did they continue to belittle him despite his success and heroics? Or did Ace grow to have enough respect for himself to cut them out of his life?
#red dwarf#personally I think it was a combination of a few things#where he became Ace all by himself while his family treated him like they did Rimmer. like shit.#and the moment they realised 'oh actually arnold is going to be somebody after all' it was too late. Maybe when he was a teenager.#they couldn't be redeemed and Ace had way better things to do than reconcile with a family that would just be begging him for things#connections. money. hook ups#because the thing about Ace is he is everything Rimmer COULD'VE been. and one of those things is BRAVER#and that's about his recklessness in the space corp#but it could also be about being bigger and braver in the face of the people who abused him#Rimmer would assume being Ace solved his problems with family. That it would make them love him. And it did#but in a way that was unfulfilling and false#Rimmer could not comprehend throwing that away. even if it was built on fakeness#He would take fakeness in a heartbeat if it meant he was loved#and that's the major difference between Ace and Rimmer in my mind#fmj#fmj: text#whole fuckin essay in the tags
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Sorta a continuation of this post.
I’ve been thinking more about reverse robins AU with Duke as the Dick/Nightwing parallel, and I have some ideas.
So like, Duke came first. He was the light to Batman’s darkness. I don’t know if he would start off with Signal or another mantle and become Signal later on, but he definitely had the bright colors from the start. Batman might be the Dark Knight but Duke was Gotham’s (K)night Light. Batman fought what hid in the shadows but Signal chased the shadows away, provided a guiding light home. He was the Sunshine when the never ending grey clouds got too thick. He was Gothams hope and inspiration for a brighter future.
But don’t forget he was also a menace. I don’t think it would go down exactly like it did in the comics, it was the early years for Batman-and for the villains as well. After Duke’s parents were gone (maybe by Joker still turning them mad with Joker gas in Joker earliest year, maybe year one for him or something else) he started planning. He started working harder in school, focusing on the sciences to one day make a cure but also would go out looking for his parents, like in canon. He would stumble into things way bigger, overhearing plots from villains and mafias and decided to become an inconvenience for them. Letting the airs out of tires when no one was watching, a fire alarm pulled right before an attack, door stoppers on the outside of each door to a warehouse trapping the villains who where planning inside. A sudden strong of bad luck befalling the main terrors of Gotham. It didn’t go unnoticed, especially by Batman. Duke kept his streak of being unseen until one night he crossed paths with the Bat.
Bruce for his part would have know about the little boy who lost his parents in the attack, and it would have also brought up some memories for him as well. He would have kept a small track of him, but noticed he was in foster care so didn’t do much until one day he came across the reason behind all the karma the villain have be having. Looking into the boys eyes and seeing the same fire that he had, blazing more fierce as Duke explains how he will find his parents and save them, and if he could prevent more bad things along the way he will. Something pinging in Bruce’s soul, this kid lost his parents like he did but not fully, and he still had hope among the need for justice, something that had faded so long ago for himself. He took Duke back that day, promising that he will find Duke’s parents, and kept a closer eye on him after the fact.
Duke noticed that after that day it became like clockwork, he would sneak out, search Gotham, cause a little chaos, get caught by the Bat and brought back to his current foster home. Bruce did some digging, looked for Dukes parents but also found out that Leslie Thompkins was the person in charge of Duke’s case. After a few weeks of the new schedule he met up with Dr. Thompkins. They talked about how Duke has been bounced around from home to home and sneaking out to find his parents almost every night. After a long conversation, and not as much convincing as one would expect, Duke found himself being driven to his next foster home, Wayne Manor.
Okay I’m going to leave this here for now. I ended up writing so much more than I though I would lmao. I have more ideas and will probably continue this soon.
#batfam#duke thomas#signal#signal dc#batman#bruce wayne#dc#dc comics#reverse robin au#reverse robins#leslie thompkins#this evolved so much as I wrote it#I didn’t realize I had this fleshed out of an idea lmao#Duke is just so perfect to be the first robin/sidekick to batman#because robin was originally the hope to batman’s fear#that sorta goes away with each Robin and you get a completely different vibe by the time we have Damian#like don’t get me wrong I love Damian#but Robin evolved so much from Dick to Damian#and he was the first sidekick#who not only inspired the city but also set the blueprint for other sidekicks#and set a hope for the younger generation#built a community#and as much as Damian is apart of that community in canon now he was a prickly little guy when he first arrived on the scene#Duke on the other hand is a literal ray of sunshine your honor#I also need a name for this if I keep writing#maybe ‘Duke First AU’#I dunno#the last post I made at like 3am but I feel like this might be more incoherent lmao#I also have ideas for Damian#I’m actually really excited to share it
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There is nothing funnier than the image of Price and his stereotypical pretty housespouse both going through a series of emotions when he brings home the human equivalent of a stray cat that is Nikolai, and realizing that a) Oh god he's hot and b) Oh god he's hot and I think I might like him
#pov: you are price's partner and now you're staring at an absolute brickhouse of a man going to town on the food you made for him#price either goes through a bisexual awakening or spends the next two hours googling cuckoldry#personally I'd cheat on price in a heartbeat if nik were sitting across from me but maybe im just built differently#pricenik#nikprice#nikpricereader???#nikolai x reader#price x reader#obligatory cheating is wrong#unless it's nikolai then yeah I get it#my friend called him a dirty russian scoundrel and that's how price describes him#this entire situation is just a romcom of price crying to himself bc he likes his wife/husband AND nik and his spouse going#“why not both” like that old commercial#mentally im off today and you can tell
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Kingdom Hearts Dream Drop Distance Items - Drop-Me-Not + Drop-Me-Never
#kingdom hearts dream drop distance#khddd#riku#my gif#they're not too different from one another but it's still something i wanted to see side by side#i noticed that items always take the appearance of a star when the player uses them. regardless if it's a potion or ether or anything else#you can see it just as he tosses it in the air#i've seen this in three different games so maybe it's consistent through all of them? i'll have to check#anyways i like making comparison gifs like this but i wonder sometimes if these would work better in a short video format#because they also have unique sound effects which obviously can't be captured through gifs. i just love the sound design of these games#idc if i'm part of the five and a half people on earth who care about what the items SOUND like. i think it's cool! i'm built different
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FAMILY TITLES AMONG THE HILL TRIBES
(ft. various linguistic notes and tangents)
In-universe Brakul’s self-given title of ‘Red-Dog’ is Brakul 'ne-Dainh' in his native language (Bict-Urbinnas dialect of the Highland language group) and Brakul 'Chin-Reyla' in Wardi. Ne-Dainh/Chin-Reyla is not something he treats as or considers an actual surname or identity, just a self-styled nickname. He already has a title.
Family names/surnames are not a native practice among the Hill Tribes (though some clans or individual families have adopted this practice), and all traditionally use titles that designate immediate ancestry, clan and tribe. These full titles are officially given when one comes of age and are spoken aloud in ceremony (with the entire direct male and female lines listed by name, with most traditions expecting 12 generations of each being named).
The function is to cement one’s sense of place in the world, and their place in a direct ancestral line, which puts the person under the full watch and guidance of their ancestors. It's also a critical method of recording lineage- the long held practice of each person memorizing at least 24 total direct ancestors allows for very long, largely accurate records of family history to be kept, with some people able to trace their ancestry all the way back to initial settlement of the Highlands (or even beyond).
Brakul’s full title is:
“Brakul virsum Kuligan et Borunil an Briyonis ne-Taig an Bict-Urbinnas”
Which dead literally translates to “Brakul son of Kuligan and Borunil of the Foothills (of) Red-Cattle, of the North (Urbin/Erubin) River Valley” but has a much richer meaning in the original language.
"BRAKUL VIRSUM KULIGAN ET BORUNIL"
The actual meaning here is closer to ‘Brakul, son of Kuligan and his father’s fathers, and Borunil and her mother’s mothers’.
“Virsum” means ‘child (son/daughter) of’ (the gender is contextual), but implies the person’s status as a descendant of a full male and female line of ancestors. A different word is used if you’re just saying ‘I’m so and so’s son”. The title describes him as a son of his father Kuligan and of Kuligan’s male line, and of his mother Borunil and Borunil's female line.
All ancestors (within this particular system of kinship, divided into one direct male line from the father and one direct female line from the mother, and not including husbands from the female line or wives from the male line) are invoked and credited with the word ‘virsum’. Speaking it as part of the personal title is part of the routine and necessary honoring of one’s ancestors, who watch over their descendants from the afterlife and can temporarily return to the land to guide and protect (and sometimes punish, or teach sharp lessons to) the living.
"AN BRIYONIS NE-TAIG"
The actual meaning here would be understood as ‘clan/people of the foothills where cattle are lit red by the setting sun'.
‘Briyonis’ is the word for ‘foothill’, citing his clan’s specific location being the foothills that form the slopes of the north Urbin river valley. He is of a lesser clan within the powerful North Urbin River tribe. His clan benefits from close affiliation to their more powerful ruling clans located directly in the river valley, which grants them access to a greater variety of cultivated foods, but their actual position in the foothills still renders them predominantly reliant on cattle for subsistence. Clan names referencing cattle or horses are very common, given their frequent centrality to life.
The ‘ne-Taig’ literally means ‘red cattle’, but the ‘ne’ color word for red specifically invokes shades of red seen in and cast by a rising/setting sun. This red cast is culturally regarded as a unique beauty and evocative (and part of the name) of the solar god Hraighne. The foothills his clan is physically located on are a vantage point from which the western horizon is not fully obscured by mountains, and they experience very striking sunsets and are directly touched by the light. This is fairly unique to this location, and is invoked in the clan name and identity. ‘Ne-Taig’ here suggests a visual of grazing cattle illuminated red by the sun as it crosses the horizon.
‘Ne-Dainh’ carries the same implication, a dog illuminated red by setting sunlight. The Wardi language does not have a comparable word for a sunlit red and ‘Chin-Reyla’ really does just mean ‘(orangeish) red dog’ (‘reyla’ is specific to orangey-red colors, which is the closest match he could get. There’s no way to impart the meaning of ‘sunlit-red dog’ in Wardi that is non-clunky enough to be appropriate for a name).
"AN BICT-URBINNAS"
‘an Bict-Urbinnas’ is fairly simple, Bict means ‘north’, and 'Urbin' is the name of the specific river that stems from a northern and eastern tributary. This river has a very ancient name (or a derivative of one) that predates settlement by the Hill Tribes, and its exact meaning is lost.
The root -(n)nas designates a river valley, but has strong implications of being an esteemed and bountiful place, rather than solely a literal geographical descriptor (as the river valleys are centers of power and trade in the highlands). It may be a loanword from the Wardi language family, as its usage is VERY similar in form and function to the Wardi -(n)nos, which also suggests a place of esteem and bounty (more specifically having connotations of a kingdom).
’An’ literally means ‘of’, but in the specific sense of describing the place and identity of a collection of people. ‘an Bict Urbinnas’ would be understood in speech as ‘of the north Urbin River Valley (people)’. The clans historically settled in and around the valley of the North Urbin River form the totality of the Bict-Urbinnas tribe.
The ‘Urbin’ word predates the contemporary Wardi name ‘Erubin’ for the river, the latter of which invokes the semi-mythological founding figure Erub, who himself was of a Wardi tribe located downriver to the south of the Highlands. The real historically extant ‘Erub’ was most likely named Urub after the river, with his cited name shifting over the centuries in folklore, and the Wardi name for the river shifting with it.
‘Erubin’ as a corruption of ‘Urbin’ functions very well in Wardi language due to ‘-bi/bin’ denoting something as a ‘gift’, usually in a more metaphorical sense. ‘Erubin’ is understood as meaning ‘(The river that is) Erub’s gift’, and the Erubin/Urbin river is a key tributary to the much larger Black river, one of the key rivers that feeds the region's wetter and more fertile west. This 'gift' meaning also occurs in the name of the southeastern Imperial Wardi city-state Erubinnos, which is understood as meaning ’((The kingdom that is) Erub’s gift’. He is considered to have conquered and taken the land (from the core city's actual founders, the Wogan people) and established a kingdom there in the early days of warring Wardi tribal monarchies.
#Just dropping this randomly because it's a pretty complete lore dump in my notes app#Family names are a big fucking deal in the Wardi cultural sphere and not having one is associated with being a bastard or otherwise#displaced or unwanted. If pressed Brakul either fully lies and says 'ne-Dainh' (which will just come off as 'oh it's some foreign name')#Or lists his actual title (not a family name but equally important). Sometimes listing all 24 generations if he's particularly annoyed.#It's only strictly necessary to memorize 12 ancestors in each line but it's considered good practice to be able#to cite associated non-direct ancestor husbands/wives/siblings/etc. That's where the tattoos as a mnemonic device comes in#It's easy to memorize 24 ancestors but very difficult to memorize 24 ancestors and at least some of their family members#And remembering and honoring the dead by name is of great importance- both puts you under the protection of more#ancestors (including non-direct ones) and ensures the dead's status in the afterlife is secure (it's believed that fully forgotten#dead leave the celestial fields and can no longer directly intercede with the living- though with some additional nuances to what#constitutes being fully forgotten)#Venerating and remembering the dead is a huge focus of cultural practice and additional methods are used to safeguard#ancestors (and other honored dead without descendants) whose names have been forgotten. There's one yearly holiday focused entirely on#the nameless dead where they are invoked and honored via little straw dolls that are burnt in bonfires high in the mountains so the#smoke is sent up to the Fields. It takes weeks of preparation and tens (maybe hundreds idk I'm bad with scale) of thousands of#dolls will be made each year across the Highlands for this purpose. Honoring them with effigy even without name is usually#considered enough to safeguard their afterlife for at least another year.#Also yeah kinship systems among the Hill Tribes (and very similarly among the Finns) follow a male line/female line system#Only father's father's fathers (...) and mother's mother's mothers (...) are considered direct ancestors (though all four grandparents#are sometimes honored as ancestors even if only two are considered DIRECT ancestral kin- this tradition varies)#Inheritance systems are somewhat matrilineal given that a wife is considered the owner and arbiter of property and a husband is#its protector and active manager. If a man and woman from different clans (or tribes) marry any children will be considered to be of#the clan/tribe of whichever spouse does NOT relocate in marriage.#Whether the husband moves in with the wife or the wife moves in with the husband is dependent on an arbitration process#and the husband (and his family) being able to provide a bride price (which is somewhat of a payment for the land/property#the wife's mother will be passing down to the new husband's management should he move in- and displays his ability to care#for and provide valued assets. A man who can provide a bride price tends to receive greater respect)#This is most commonly going to be livestock (and almost ubiquitously includes a single cattle to be butchered for the wedding feast)#But can include other valuables or assets like land or grain/seeds or etc. There is no intra-Highlands monetary system and the internal#economy is built on trade. So Imperial Wardi currency is mostly useless but is sometimes given in marriages between clans with strong
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( hello! this is the same anon that ask about ivan and his knowledge about the collar. and thank u, we will get through r7 TT )
seeing ivan’s schedule and the fact that he only sleep for like??? 4 hours???
i strongly believe he wore makeup to cover it cuz ain’t no way you have only 4 hours of sleep and don’t have at LEAST some eye bags. ( can confirm skull emoji help )
like,, ivan, that andrew tate’s ahh lookin schedule ain’t gonna hide it. you freak (affectionate)
It's genuinely strange how Ivan doesn't have any eyebags (one of the reasons why his sleep schedule was so unexpected)?? 😭
Makeup would make sense, yeah, he's a model after all. But the thing is he's been going through this routine ever since he was in the Anakt Garden, back when he was young (I assume all the intensive training junk really kicked up when he was around 14 or so, the age where students upgrade from a shared dorm to a single one as they're considered "teenagers"). Maybe he could have his own concealing substance that he applies every morning, but if he does I wonder at what point did he start to realize he needed it?? Did he ask to bring it into Anakt?? Maybe it's just really good skincare?? How the hell is this man hiding his eyebags so well. Till sleeps around the same amount yet his eyebags are such a prominent part of his character design. Is Ivan pulling some kind of method that condenses 9 hours into 4 and that's why he sleeps so deep?? 😭 are Till's eyebags only visible because although he sleeps the same amount he's a light sleeper/doesn't sleep?? Ivan I'd really appreciate it if you dropped tips because they'd be really useful
#you know what maybe ivan is just built different 😭 because how the fuck is he working out first thing in the morning before breakfast#alnst#alien stage#alien stage ivan#alnst ivan#asks#para.musing
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It took Arthur TWENTY MINUTES to recover from THAT betrayal and now he's adopting a pet owl with John I-
#truly he is better than me#I would be so much more petty about it#specially after what John said in the beginning like excuse fucking me?#20 minutes!!!#he's built different ig#or maybe he's just pretending which would make much more sense#malevolent#malevolent part 41#The windmill
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Wait, does the cheating thing on the bond always works? bcs that would be kinda freaky for R!Dipper like imagine you get pinned down by someone in the corner of a br or smthng and then said person kissed you and proceeded to explode into red mist and you literally have no idea what happened.
Also, would the constellation mark be a "cursed" Mark over the years, like you would give birth to a baby and the doctor says "😟 I am so sorry ma'am,,, I'm afraid your baby has the Cipher Companion mark. ( could also be something equally as science-y like Ursa Major, Constellation Calamation, etc idk)" And you just burst into tears.
Would that mean that dipper would get into a special program(demon wrangling program or smthng, demonologist? Maybe)? Or would the parents hide it away hoping that Bill would never take their child away?
(Sorry this au is just very interesting to me,,,, I hope u get more motivation, keep writing author 💪)
These are all options! The fun part of reincarnation AU being left ambiguous is that technically any of them could happen.
#Answers#Okay but for full transparency#I never really figured out what the 'cheating' consequence is#It's a nebulous concept since I've never had to write it happening#And left ambiguous because neither of these two are into anyone else - and as a writer I like to leave my options open!#I would assume that one of the few things they agreed on when making the contract was that unwelcome advances didn't count as cheating#But that the villain in question would get what was coming to them. Very Violently. They wanna step on a landmine? Let 'em have it#Dipper would have made a frowny face at the violence but agreed. Privately thinking well that's actually a *bonus*#A built-in defense system of sorts#(Something Bill was also thinking but absolutely phrased in the possessive aspect)#Whether or not the Consequences kick in before they meet again - their equivalent of their vow renewal - is up for grabs#Dipper trying to fend off someone only to have them burst into flames and/or blood would feel a terrified sense of relief#Who knows! Maybe Dipper has protection but has a chance for other actions before they meet again!#But the odds of that occurring are very slim. Partly due to his general awkwardness#And distinct hesitation on Dipper's part. Even though he *thinks* he should be enthusiastic#He looks at the person he's in bed with and just. It feels weird. Maybe because he hasn't (in his memory) done this before#Great job Dipper!! Someone in your bed and the best you can do is kinda grimace. Real sexy.#If he does ever manage to get up to something it's not even a tenth of the time he has with his husband#Dipper reincarnations are all very unfortunately attracted as hell to Bill Cipher and they're deeply alarmed by it#I do like the idea of different parental groups finding Dipper's birthmark and having different reactions#Perhaps a random incarnation of one of his family members ends up in charge of him one time#The results would vary *wildly* depending on who it was#On a scale of Mabel Mom to Ford Uncle how are you preparing this person for his invitable enhusbanding#(Stan remains pretty much the same but has a lot of bad marriage advice)#Wow that's a lot of tags even for me#I am going to queue this and sleep
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i think asura is very intriguing but in the like i love exploring how fucked up asura is as a character. Like.
We are given just enough about him to piece together how he got to the point where he is, but not enough to fully have a detailed backstory, but you don't need a detailed backstory to understand the basic facts of this god's life:
He was made, a full adult, and he just simply was. He did not grow up, he was not born, he was simply made.
He is afraid of all things, and many things. Asura's anxiety and paranoia has made him a very sad and pitiable man before becoming a kishin. He couldn't speak up properly and mumbled every single thing he said. He would cover his face in scarves, and wear six shirts. He was that afraid.
He ate his weapon partner eventually because of his paranoia.
He became a kishin soon after gaining the ability to eat souls after devouring his weapon partner.
From then on, he has enjoyed a more erratic and hysterical and manic personality, feeling the extremes of every emotion he couldn't feel prior thanks to his anxiety.
With all of these, it's not hard to put in the puzzle pieces with a few more breadcrumbs:
Asura was a fragment of Lord Death, mainly his fear, and that is why he was so afriad.
Asura was not one to make friends or get close to anyone, he has been very isolated his entire life and he was afraid of even his weapon partner.
He devoured his weapon partner, a very out of the blue thing for everyone because nobody knew how far he was spiraling then, and started descending into a way to defeat his fears, eventually becoming a kishin and finding that peace he's been looking for.
He does not feel remorse, or regret. And from his perspective, why should he? Asura finally found peace after his entire life being nothing but fear, and anxiety, and paranoia, and now he feels free from those awful and terrifying thoughts that had a hold on him. Now he can show his face, speak confidently, he can smile and laugh with everyone, he's not afraid anymore. He's no longer afraid! It's a win, it's a win for him at the cost of everyone else and he doesn't care about everyone else so it's no biggie. I mean if I was Asura, I wouldn't wanna give that up either!
but his very existence is harmful now because of what he has become-- his very presence can drive people to madness and he does not care. So what if other people are afraid now ? Not his problem, not his to deal with.
my man's fucked up but let him be fucked up he's an interesting creacher that way
#kishin asura#soul eater#character thoughts#character analysis ???#maybe ?!?!?!#i just have#a lot of thoughts on this fucking guy#i also think the parallels he shares with kid is very interesting#and i wish wish wish the manga or anime built a bit more upon it#idk it'd be very interesting to see their two different ways of dealing with fear come to light bc like#Kid deals with fear by having people to protect#so he's more willing to do the scary thing to make sure the people he wants to keep safe are#yk#SAFE#but asura dealt with fear by giving into it and feeding into it#bc he wasn't given or taught any better !!! he doesn't know how to handle his fear because he's afraid of handling it#he's afraid of everything !!!#so ofc he's not gonna find a healthy fix he's going to go for the unhealthy fix just like lord death did#he wants to eradicate all his fear instead of learning to live with it
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i feel the warmth in my chest (and the chill on my skin makes it that much clearer)
(1,964 words)
Evan and Gregory, while waiting those few agonizing hours before Halloween can truly begin, go outside into the chilly weather and play in the leaves.
🎃🍫👻
It's a crisp Autumn afternoon when Evan steps out onto Gregorys porch. The screen door slams behind him, and the air transitions from warm to chilly in only seconds. The breeze washes over his face like a wave, and Evan finds he dosnt mind the cold that much in this moment.
It makes his nose numb and his fingers freezing, but unlike how he usually feels about the cold, he welcomes it. He takes a deep breath, smelling the scent of fallen leaves and crisp air and the pumpkins Evan had carved with Gregory last week sitting by his feet next to the stairs. It fills his lungs, and alongside the aftertaste of Aunt Chicas cookies on his tongue, the chill is pleasant, unlike how its usually so unbearing and biting in his own home.
It doesnt take long for the temperature to wash over him fully. By the time hes stepping down the stairs, his thin,white overcoat flowing behind him, its left his shoulders shaking and his teeth chattering.
But so like he's not used to, the deep, bone chilling cold only adds onto his excitement. It's that type of chill you can only get during Halloween, with that specific vibe and feeling coming along with it. Evan has never liked that unmatched feeling. All it ever told him was that Halloween was on it's way, and along with it, Michael and his pushing and pulling and jabbing and messing with. With the addition of the neighborhood kids jumping in if they'd see him walking down the street on the one night of the year it would be acceptable to scare him with scary masks and bloody fingers and camouflaging cloaks, it made for a pretty dreadful day.
He takes another look at his costume, a ghost, with white flowy sheer fabric that makes him look like he floated right down from the clouds. Underneath is a white sweater and pants, and his makeup is done to make him appear ghastly and, well... dead. Eyes sunken in with deep shadows and complection pale.
Gregory is matching with him, kind of. Gregory's costume is of a murder victim. Hes wearing sort of varsity jacket with a plastic knife stabbed in his gut, and his face is painted with bloody makeup and a faux black eye. Gregory hadn't explained the specific costume he called a 'Zombie Murder Victim High School Football Star', just gotten excited over the fact that they matched with their undead themes.
Its Evans first year matching with someone. His first year having someone to go trick or treating with. Theres something about this year. It doesn't leave him guessing. It doesn't leave him on edge, wondering who will strike first, all while being so uncertain but sure at the same time that something will go wrong. This year, he has Gregory and his family. This year, he has people who actually care about how he feels, and understand how to have fun.
This year, he knows Michael will be across town with his friends, and that his father will lock himself in his workshop. He knows that the neighborhood kids wont dare mess with him now, because of how many times Gregory has shown them a thing or two over the better part of this year.
This year, Evan isnt dreading the coming hours. He isnt hiding in his room, celebration or joy for the Holiday nowhere to be found, because he has to watch his back and sides. This year, he isnt considering running away for the night, even though he had always known he would never be brave enough to do it.
Instead, he's going trick or treating with his best friend, and he only feels excitment and anticipation, compared to the stark contrast of last year where all he felt was on edge and trapped in his own house.
The sun is only just setting by the time he steps onto that little pathway leading to the backyard from the front porch. Waiting for it to get dark has been agonizing. It had only gotten too much when he and Gregory were sat in front of a movie they'd seen a thousand times, makeup and costumes done, and unable to sit without wiggling or fidgeting, and Gregory had jumped up and gone "That's it! I can't just sit here anymore!"
That's why Evan's followed him outside. For the better part of the day Gregory has been more restless than a bored puppy.
Evan thinks the description fits when he finally catches up to Gregory and finds him digging through the shed in his backyard. Evan doesn't really know why he came out here. Theres much less to do outside than there is inside, but his intentions become clear when he moves to stand by Gregory's shoulder, and he goes Aha! while retrieving something.
Evan stares blankly when Gregory pulls out a rake, turning to face him and grinning at him. "Want to build a leaf pile and do cannonballs in it?"
He doesn't even have to ask.
It's not long before they're trekking through backyard, browning leaves crunching under their sneakers as they head to that big tree in the middle of the yard. When they get there, they waste no time grabbing the big rake and making the inklings of a pile on the flattest bit of ground.
The rake is heavy, and Evan can barely control it, if how it swings around and almost hits Gregory in the face is any indication. The handle is ice cold on his fingers, but it only makes Evan that much more aware of the excitment thrumming through his veins.
With Evan using the rake, Gregory takes to getting on his knees and shepherding the leaves to the pile with his hands. Gregory laughs over the dirt under his fingernails and how the still-damp leaves from the light shower earlier are chilly on his hands, and it makes Evan abandon the rake and get on the ground with him.
It takes longer than it should to finish the pile. They keep getting caught up in throwing the leaves at eachother like snowballs and using their hands to push waves at eachother like they're in a pool. The leaves end up more scattered than the were originally, and Evan has to get the rake again.
By the time they finish and theres a huge pile of damp leaves sitting in front of them, the sky is a dark, deep blue with the horizon a yellow. The sun is only barely peeking through the trees, and it's enough for the automatic porch lights to come on.
With the lack of sunlight, it's gotten that much colder. Evan's shivering enough that it makes his laughs warble, but he doesnt care. He doesnt care about the cold.
They only take a short break before they jump in. Evan lays flat on the ground, damp excess leaves and ice cold dirt underneath him. His throat is dry from the chill and how much he talked, and laughed, and his cheeks are sore from smiling too much. His nose is numb, and the thin, cheap Spirit Halloween costume does nothing for keeping him warm, but he doesn't need it.
Through the cold, it makes the warmth blooming in his stomach that much clearer. It makes the laughter bubbling in his chest and the excitement that the fun isnt even over, yet, he still gets to go trick or treating with Gregory after this, that much more apparent.
He has the warmth that spawned inside of him from spending time with his best friend and having fun with him to keep him toasty. So unlike his own home, where the chill is all there is. No warmth or comfort to adhere for that fact.
It's only now that Evan thinks that maybe, he doesn't really dislike the cold. Just how the cold is what comes with his unfeeling house and unpleasant family members and uncomfortable atmosphere.
Because here, right now, as he lays on the freezing ground, sky darkening above them and the last bit of leaves on the big tree in Gregory's backyard fluttering in the chilly breeze, he realizes he likes what comes with the cold, and not what the cold comes from.
With the cold comes the awareness of the warmth unfurling in his stomach. With the cold comes drinking the delicious, steaming hot chocolate Aunt Chica made. With the cold comes bundling up with his favorite sweaters, cuddling up under a fuzzy blanket, and watching a movie with Gregory.
With the cold comes those agonizing few hours before Halloween truly begins, and making a leaf pile with your best friend.
Evan knows his all-white costume is dirtier by the time he finally gets up, the knees of his white jeans brown and dirtied, but he doesnt have time to dwell on it when all he hears is a breathy laugh before hes shoved face first into the leaf pile.
Even through the leaves submerging his head, he can hear Gregory cackling. He sputters when leaves get in his mouth, and while regaining his footing after rolling around a few times, he wastes no time shooting up and grabbing Gregory by the shoulders.
Gregory yelps when hes yanked down with Evan, and all Evan is aware of when his eyes shut in glee from how hard hes laughing is the soft, scratchy, earthy leaves beneath him, the breeze in the air that just screams Halloween, and Gregory's body fallen on top of him.
Gregory grabs some leaves and smushes them into his hair. All Evan can do is screech at the wet chill before grabbing his own fistful and doing the same. Leaves fall over them like a wave when they roll around, wrestling in the yard.
They only stop when they get too tired to keep going. His costume is definitely dirty by now, damp like the leaves and dirt. The scent of wet earth and the cold and Halloween washes over him, and all he can find in himself to do is grin, and giggle breathlessly and chatter with Gregory as he lies on the ground, shoulder to shoulder with him.
Its almost pitch black by the time Freddy opens the door leading to the backyard, stepping outside, Frankenstiens monster costume and all. "Kids? Are you two ready to go? Its almost time for trick or treating!"
Evan only shares a fleeting look with Gregory before they both shoot up, previous exhaustion from their little fight completely gone. Evan runs side by side with Gregory to the door, his costume with the mud stained hem flowing behind him, and all Evan can feel in this moment is warmth, despite how his nose is numb and his shoulders are shaking and theres this chilly, floaty feeling in his chest.
He knows that there are definitely leaves in his hair when he steps inside after Gregory, and when the heat of the home blasts him in his face, making his freezing face tingle, the warmth prickling and sharp, Evan finds that with the cold can come the warmth, and maybe it isnt so weird that Evan feels nothing of the sort when it comes to his own house, and his own family.
It was never about the cold.
Just like how the warmth with Gregory and his family has never been about the temperature.
He only has time to grab his candy bucket (shaped like a mummified teddy bear) before he and Gregory are shooting through the front door, racing to Freddys car. He smiles even wider when the cold air rushes across his face again, and he can hear Gregory's footsteps next to him and Freddy and the others' voices behind them.
ao3 link
#feel like having a family that actively is out to get you and hates you would be awful on holidays.#in a way it makes you feel worse because maybe nothing is different#but the fact that its a holiday and youre supposed to be having fun but youre sitting here on edge and scared and miserable as usual just#makes you more upset#with evan its not even just the usual#really.#its the combination of having your mood soured because everybody is having fun celebrating and decorating with their families#but your family just. doesnt do that.#plus michael probably notices evans mood and gets his tons of scary masks he now has access to because of the halloween season#and torments evan times two. and now he has all of the tools at his disposal with multiple masks to choose from to target evans phobias#but anyway hes chilling now! literally.#he has people who love him and have built him up all this time and its not perfect#but man is evan happy he has them.#he gets to be a kid and relax and it makes his house a little more bearable when he knows thats not it for him#flashlight duo#gregory and evan#pandas writes#oneshot#halloween#fnaf gregory#evan afton#flashlight duo modern au#my fics
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now that i've taken in the entire show and am about to rewatch simply because i can............... i'm so pissed that dave erickson got fired because damn........
#i just think that s4 would have been insane.#i presume frank still would have wanted off the show and so naturally that chasm dave built between maddie and nick would've been... yea#idk- i think it would've been good tv. maybe. he doesn't talk too much on it but he says enough to give an impression.#i'm also inherently biased because he also said madison was the one character he saw making it all the way to the series finale#which ultimately. she does. but the story would have been much different for her. she would've felt More Madison#additionally.. of course there are characters born from the switch of writers that i'm glad we got and may otherwise have not got but....#i'd pay a pretty penny to have been able to see what dave had in store for the characters we had with us at the end of s3.#and to see what he would have done with 3b had he not wanted to wrap up certain loose ends of his creation before his departure.#the first 3 seasons of fear are the best ones. imo. for so many reasons. which i think had a lot to do with dave.#he separated ftwd from twd in big ways that i'm not going to get into but so much got jammed in s4-s8 that. it felt like the new writers#were mostly trying to pay homage to twd than to the characters and the story lines that made fear what it was. y'know.#the entire tone seemed to shift in the show. they subjected it to all the crazy time jumps. etc etc etc. which works in some ways on twd bu#they didn't do the same service to ftwd.#maybe that's just me.#dave Got the vision.#and i think it would've been really beautiful to get to see him ride it out (even if for another season or two)
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On one hand, I want a final fantasy 6 remake, because the game is criminally underrated and the amount of fan content (which is all absolutely fantastic btw) is Not Enough for my neurodivergent, hyperfixating brain.
On the other hand, that would inevitably encourage more people to join the fandom, which would be great, except it seems these days the bigger a fandom gets the more toxic it becomes, and I really like what we have going on over here in our little corner. We all just love the game and its characters and nobody fights about who should and shouldn't date who or who you shouldn't like because they're ~problematique~. Nobody's trying to make one ship morally better than another, nobody's calling anyone names or threatening to doxx people who don't agree with their opinions. It's so peaceful and I love that for us. We're just vibing. Moisturized. Unbothered. In our lane. Flourishing.
#as someone who was in an extremely toxic and chaotic fandom and lowkey still traumatized#to the point where I'm afraid to mention which fandom it was/what my ship was#i have to say#i genuinely love it here#i was nervous at first sharing my ships and headcanons but everyone is so chill i was worried for nothing#thank you to everyone I've interacted with who has made this fandom a healing experience for me#i shudder to think about what some of the people i interacted with in a previous fandom would do with ff6#probably would take edgar's flirting at face value and call him problematic for objectifying women#instead of considering the narrative and what we know about him and the way he actually treats women#my man drinks loving and respecting women juice he's not a creep#or that weird moment with relm that admittedly made me double take before i realized what he meant#theyd have a whole campaign against him lmfao#bc those people boil characters alive until they're just a formless pile of tropes and stereotypes#and seem to disregard all positive aspects of a character they don't like which is fine#but then they go and try to force other people to think like they do and ugh#theres a lot of silly moments in the game and aspects of these characters that make them well rounded and realistically flawed at times#and i fear that would get lost in the chaos if the floodgates opened after a remake#maybe im just jaded lmao#im jaded and i have anxiety so im always thinking about The Worst Case Scenario#the collective positive spirit of the dwellers in this fandom might actually foster a positive space if more people were to come in#ff6#my post#i was gonna say maybe this is bc we're mostly adults#but that falls flat when i remember how some of the most toxic and immature people in some fandoms are grown ass adults#who bully each other and younger fans#and some of the most mature and cool people were actually younger#maybe ff6 fans are just built different lmao#also idk how old anyone else actually is there might be teenagers here i just don't think about it a lot
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i love watching anime movies in theaters bc i feel like every time there's always funny comments. anyway this time was when nezuko sacrifices herself and kicks tanjirou away and is fully in the sun, and in the complete silence someone down the row said "she dead"
#me and my friend knowing she was about to conquer the sun were saying like “no baby she's fine just give her a minute”#i did laugh about muzan because he spent all this time being soo pathetic and nezuko just prioritized & is built different 💅#maybe if he applied himself#personal
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