#maybe I'll talk about it more in the future

[imnotshua]

joke me something awful - jww

٠࣪⭑ pairing: jeon wonwoo x fem reader ٠࣪⭑ summary: it's 2002 and you ask wonwoo to take you home. later, he wonders why you haven't been doing this the whole time. ٠࣪⭑ genre: childhood friends to lovers, smut, fluff, angst, college au ٠࣪⭑ rating: explicit. minors do not interact with me, i'll block you. ٠࣪⭑ warnings: swearing, drinking, undefined relationships. not really a situationship tho, it’s very much mutual pining. reader and wonwoo are just stupid regular people who say and do stupid things, it is intentional, please love them anyway. wonwoo is down bad i'm so sorry friends, he is just!!!!!! occasional use of pet names (baby & angel from wonwoo. darling/sweetheart from others), no use of y/n or other variations, porn with plot mostly, ambiguous ending (sorry my beloveds). wonwoo could do with some more confidence ig. a bitter ex (oc) is mentioned and important for the plot! mentions of previous hook ups between wonwoo and reader. toxicity from the ex, but i don’t particularly think reader and wonu are! they just :(((((( feel free to correct me tho. ٠࣪⭑ smut contents: gendered terms, kisses, fingering (pussy + mouths), oral (f receiving), unprotected sex (it's 2002 college students were stupid then ok), dry humping lmao, cum eating, wonwoo on top, cum in pants, sloppy kinda, wet patches <3, soooo much hand holding, morning sex, neediness <333333, all in all they are quite soft and disgustingly into each other. if you think i've forgotten anything please let me know so i can fix my post! ٠࣪⭑ wc: 5.4k - complete ٠࣪⭑ a/n: i listened to fob's from under the cork tree on repeat for like 2 weeks straight and needed to do something with the feelings in my chest. this universe started in a different work that i'll post another time, this is the before. it is complete on its own, can be read without the others, but please note that future fics for this couple will be non-linear and feature different stages of their lives. the title comes from Fall Out Boys I've Got A Dark Alley–. Please consider listening to Air - Yeji, it's the feeling this couple gives me. ٠࣪⭑ thank yous: to my loves, @100vern and @starlightkyeom– thank you for putting up with my screaming over wonwoo, thank u for reading this over and telling me it wasn't gross. to jewel again, thank you for the banner. i appreciate u both so much. to everyone else, thank you for coming to my little corner, i hope you enjoy this one.

· · ─────── ·𖥸· ─────── · ·

2002

Wonwoo didn’t apply for the fellowship program, despite all your insistence that if you got in he’d be sure to, that he’s smarter than you’ll ever be. At the time he said it felt like too much work, but later he realised he couldn’t take the fear of rejection. This would’ve just been another failed start. Deep down he wondered if he’d even deserve it.

The celebratory dinner for new scholars is supposedly an elitist, snobby, and frankly, horrid affair so naturally you’re going. If only to foster those connections you’re making for your future career. Wonwoo turns his nose up but he agrees to be your date nonetheless. You don’t have to beg, just ask the question and say he wouldn’t embarrass you like the man you’ve been dating for four months, and that fills him with some strange sense of achievement. 

Of course, once that guy hears you’re taking Wonwoo instead of him, he dumps you without ceremony. And now Wonwoo sits on your bed in a rented suit far too expensive for him to feel entirely comfortable in, watching your reflection choose which earrings to wear, and he wonders if you’re even bothered. He doesn’t know how to talk to you about this. Partners are off limits, usually, but since he had some involvement in the break up, in some roundabout way, he thinks maybe he should at least check. He wets his lips.

“How are you feeling?” he asks. “Since Hongseok?”

You meet his eyes in the mirror. “Fine,” you say. “I don’t think it was going anywhere. He wanted something more traditional. I started to get the impression he was setting up to cheat on me, actually.”

Wonwoo is unsurprised, sounds like you are too. “You’re better off without him,” he says, picking at bits of fluff from your blanket clinging to his trousers. It’s one his mother knitted for your sixteenth birthday. “You’ll meet someone new in no time.”

“Yeah, I don’t know,” you start. “I think I’ll stay single for a while.” 

Wonwoo lifts his eyebrows in surprise and you catch him in the mirror. With a laugh you say, “Don’t look at me like that.”

“You’ve been a serial dater since we moved to this city and you’re stopping now?” Wonwoo’s lips twist into a grin. Teasing is easier than edging too close to real. “Just when you’ve hit your prime?”

You scoff. “Rude. I’ll hit my prime in my thirties. Just watch.”

Wonwoo watches as you apply your usual lipstick and thinks about the time you didn’t wear any. You were just kids but it didn’t seem so long ago. You’re almost the same. Eighteen years of your starkly different lives intertwined and somehow still as close as you ever were. Still the sharpest person he’s ever known, still the sweetest if only in private. Still his parents' favourite person, still his. (His stomach twists). 

You’re giving yourself a final appraisal in the mirror before turning to Wonwoo and asking how you look. 

“Good,” he says, with a nod. Breathtaking, really. “Pretty.” 

“Thanks,” you say, smiling relieved, moving to sit next to him on the bed and linking his arm. “We scrub up well, don’t we?”

“Mm,” he agrees, following your gaze into the mirror, pinpricks creeping over his skin. You look like you’re together, he thinks, as he notices you’ve chosen earrings that go with his tie. Anyone could make that assumption. 

“You look sad, Wonwoo,” you say, quiet and soft. “Are you sad?”

“No,” he says, throat tight and feeling like his back is pressed against the wall. “What would I have to be sad about?” He lets you slip your hand into his, lets you lean your head on his shoulder for a moment, because this is how you make him feel better. Because you know that he can’t be pushed to talk about things he hardly understands. Barely a minute goes by before he sucks in a breath and says, “Shall I call us a taxi?” 

“Sure, number’s in the book next to the telephone,” you say. “Want a drink? I need one for this.”

“Water for me, someone’s got to get you home.”

“Aw, come on. Don’t make me drink alone.” You laugh when Wonwoo rolls his eyes. “I’ll be on my best behaviour, I promise. My reputation’s on the line.”

“One beer,” he offers. You pout and he can’t stop his smile.

· · ─────── ·𖥸· ─────── · ·

It went like this:

Both of you had no less than three drinks before the taxi showed up.

Your peers kept thinking that he was your “elusive boyfriend” and upon correction that he was ‘just Wonwoo’ their eyes lit up and exclaimed “oh we’ve heard so much about you!” 

The way he blushed made you want to kiss him silly (you had another drink instead).

Drink five? Four? Everyone here is obliterated, no one notices you and Wonwoo readying to leave.

He looks so pretty like this, tie undone, glasses slipping down his nose, pulling off his jacket and draping it over your shoulders, watching your lips as you talk.

The taxi you pre booked won’t be here for another ten minutes but the room was so stuffy (in both the literal and figurative sense) that as soon as you tell Wonwoo you need to get out of there, he’s nodding and pulling you out into the street. It’s so busy– of course, it’s OT week– that you struggle to find a spot where you won’t be bumped into for a while, eventually settling against the wall of the building opposite, in good view of the road. The noise around you is hectic, and you’re desperate for something less bothersome. Wonwoo looks drunk, looks fucked out. Cheeks flushed and lips parted. Eyes closed, he tips his head back against the brick and exposes the column of his throat. Pretty.

“Hey,” you say, slipping your arms around his waist. “Thanks for coming with me.”

Wonwoo hums. “Yeah, ‘course.” A pause– he wraps his arms around your shoulders. He’s so heavy but you like how it feels. “Anything for you.”

There’s a saccharine sweetness stirring in your stomach. You ask him to tell you the story of Baucis and Philemon again, press your body against his and hope he can still read you like he used to. It’s been years. Maybe he won’t want to.

“Why do you like that one so much?” he asks. You take in the smell of his soap. You know you shouldn’t want to go down this road again. “It’s hardly even a love story.”

“They’re the ultimate love story,” you insist, looking up at your friend to find him already watching you. “They’re precious to each other. I want that kind of love.”

It’s more than that. Baucis and Philemon have a timeless love. Their lightness oozes out of them, their love is both infectious and tender. So devoted they choose to die together. Never without the other even after they’re gone– turned to trees, and their branches and roots weave together so tightly that you can’t tell where either one of them starts and they stay like that, as relics of a lost ancient world. 

There is something ancient about Wonwoo, too. For as long as you can remember he has been older than his years, telling stories of places long buried, of deities forgotten about. You think maybe he was meant for then and not now, the cusp of the twenty-first century. He keeps echoes within him. Carries heavy stones to turn over in his hands and spend time memorising the marks. He is deliberate in the way he moves, no ill-perceived rush, and Wonwoo’s silence carries more weight than his words. 

So when his eyes flicker to your lips again, and he still doesn’t move, you know it’s on you. You know you’re going to have to be the one to shift the sands, change the direction of the tide. You’ve been lovers before. Neither of you have ever said never. 

· · ─────── ·𖥸· ─────── · ·

He’d been thinking about it all night but you were the one to press your lips against the corner of his mouth, eyes on his and holding the proximity. Are you thinking about it like he is? Is your heart thrumming in your chest like his? 

“I can feel you thinking.” 

“Uh huh.” His mouth goes dry. He can’t kiss you with a sandpaper tongue. 

You run a finger between two buttons on his shirt, eyes up, watching his reaction. “Can I stay at your place tonight? Hansol’s at his parents' house this weekend, right?” 

Wonwoo’s mind goes blank and he can feel the pink creep over his cheeks. “Did you squeeze your Pompompurin pyjamas in that little bag?”

Your lips twitch in an almost smile, lean in to ghost a kiss against his bottom lip. Wait to see if he pulls back– he doesn’t. His hands just slip down your back, touching the skin under the strap of your dress. Didn’t imagine when he helped you zip up earlier that he’d be the one invited to pull it off you. Has he hidden his desire so poorly? “Do you wanna fuck me in those pyjamas, Wonwoo?”

The street noise is drowned out when you kiss him properly, and it’s embarrassing the way he’s breathless, gripping at your waist and pulling your body closer. Humiliating that this is in full view of strangers, doesn’t want them to see how you lick into his mouth, doesn’t want them to hear your sharp gasp as his teeth drag over your bottom lip. He spins you on the spot, crowds you against the brick and blocks out the world with his shoulders. You pull on a button and slip your hand through the gap. The touch burns. Your kisses are suffocating, loves the way you smile into it, the way you make him chase your lips, run your fingers along the waistband of his trousers an– fuck– he’s gonna get hard in the middle of the street. 

Desperate, he pulls off you and whips his head around to look for the taxi, you’re already complaining. “Not here–,” he says, words rasped, catching in his throat. He can see the taxi rounding the corner, and in a beat he’s pushing off the wall and dragging you toward it by the hand. 

· · ─────── ·𖥸· ─────── · ·

He doesn’t touch you in the taxi. Hopes you know it’s not because he didn’t want to, he just doesn’t want to lose himself. His fingers flex eager on the leather seats, wanting something he won’t take. As the driver fiddles with the radio, you lean over to lay your hand across his, to whisper in his ear, “do you still lick your fingers after you’ve made someone come on them?” Wonwoo doesn’t answer, but he can feel the way you watch him swallow– thick– and stare hard out the window at the passing lights. He never did that with anyone but you.

Now you’re paying for it. He’s more confident in the privacy of his bedroom, in the dark. Cages you in his bed, doesn’t bother to turn on the lights before smothering you with his body. Your mouth on his– wet, and eager, and bruising. His hands move to your face, in your hair, angling your head to give his lips access to the tender spot behind your ear. He’s got your dress bunched up around your waist. Takes up all the space between your legs, still too much fabric separating you. One of Wonwoo’s hands cast over the swell of your breast, his thumb tracing circles over your nipple through the thin fabric. You melt into the touch, rolling your hips against him, he sighs into your skin. “Can feel how hard you are,” you gasp, hands pulling at his hair. Makes his skin electric. 

He moves faster, desperate, and you trap his body between your legs, angle your hips so his cock can rub against your clothed cunt just right. “Gonna ruin your trousers,” you whisper. Yeah yeah yeah, fuck it, he’ll pay for dry cleaning for once. The warmth, the wet, seeping through makes him insane. Needs it more than ever, needs you just like this, breath ragged and pupils blown. Needs you needing him so bad you can’t even get out of your clothes before you come. Needs you whining, needs you telling him how badly you want it. Won’t ask for anything, but you know what he likes. It’s always been easy with you. 

“Feels good,” you say. Wonwoo nods into your neck, the pressure building so fast it’s blinding. Hips thrusting rough, rutting like an animal against your clit, desperate for you to get off before he falls apart but he’s so cl–”Missed you so much, Wonwoo.”

“Ah, fu- fuck–” You’re sucking a mark into his neck and Wonwoo can’t stop. Comes hard, breath catching and his rhythm is all fucked up, so fucking embarrased that he couldn’t draw this out. You’re talking him through it– sounds like heaven whispering how good he is, how good this feels, how you love how he sounds when he forgets himself. Didn’t realise he was groaning. A mess of a person reflected in the cum staining through the fabric of this horribly expensive rental. 

Shit.

Needs to get out of this fucking suit. Needs to press his face into your cunt. Wants to ruin you for everyone else. Four years– you wasted four years with other people when you could’ve been doing this. Pushes away thoughts of you being someone else's not even a week ago. Some sick, possessive slice of him wants to reclaim you, mark you up and present you as his to the world. Wants to take the cum in his underwear and push it into your body. Look, see, she’s mine mine mine. Wonwoo’s chest aches.

Your clothes shed in silence. You lay him back against the pillows, kneeling next to him with spread legs, he loves when you let him see. You take one of his hands in yours and work circles into his palm as you pull two of his fingers into your mouth. Get them slick with spit, work your tongue over the tips of his fingers. He can hardly breathe watching you manoeuvre his hand down your body against your cunt, using him like a toy, until his remaining brain cells start to work and he takes over the movement. He’s half hard again already. 

“Shit, you’re so wet,” he rasps. Crooks his fingers and you whine. Wants to eat the sounds spilling from your lips. Needs to do something with his mouth so he doesn’t say something stupid. “Sit on my face?” he asks, obvious urgency in his voice. 

“N-no, like this first,” you say, almost like you’re begging. “Missed your hands so much.”

You look at him through hazy eyes as he works you quickly to the edge, pulling whimpers from your throat every time he plays with your clit. Feels you get impossibly wet when he slips his fingers in deep and moans unashamed along with you. You buck into his palm, head tipping forward to watch his soaked long fingers fucking into you agonisingly slow. Your breath stutters in your throat as he uses his other hand to tease your skin, trailing gently over the meat of your thigh, your ribs, cupping your breast and then dragging you over him to take a nipple in his mouth. Flicks his wet tongue over until it pebbles between his teeth, and you gasp. 

“M’close already,” you whisper. “Gonna come, Wonwoo.” He ruts his hard cock into the air, chasing heat that isn’t there. Fucking loser. You don’t even notice with the way he’s got your breaths coming in fragments. You come undone like lightning, cunt soaking and pulsing around his fingers, your body collapses on top of him, your forehead pressed into his chest. Wonwoo wants a taste but wants to work you through the aftershocks first. He teases slow circles over your clit until you fall apart with a sob, and have to drag his hand out from between your legs.

He waits until you sag to your side– catches sight of your cheeks, flushed and sweat sticking to your skin, your pupils blown out and breathing shallow, more beautiful than he’s ever seen you– before he brings his fingers to his mouth to taste you on them. 

“You’re indecent,” you laugh in disbelief. He almost feels gross until you’re babbling about how hot he is. How he makes you insane. You laugh again when he rolls you onto your back and settles between your legs. It’s been so long he needs to do this right. Starts by pressing a gentle kiss to your clit, ghosts more over your centre, waits for the sound of your gentle sigh before laving a thick stripe over you. Knows just the way to make you molten. He laps at your core until you’re almost sobbing. You jolt whenever his nose slips over your clit, and you’re begging for him to stop the tease. He’ll never deny you what you want. His tongue flicks fast over your clit, his face wet with you now. His moans sound muffled against your cunt when his name falls from your lips in staccato breaths. 

Things have hardly changed. Four years and now, it’s just the fucking same. Your fingers still find purchase in his hair the same way. Mouths at your inner thighs to give your cunt a break. Shit, you’re so hot. You’re clenching around fucking nothing. Pulls the skin between his teeth and you’re writhing, trying to get his tongue back where you need it. Love when you get desperate like this. 

Your nails drag over the nape of his neck and he’s close to losing control– fucks his cock against the mattress and almost cries at the pressure. You grind against his face, Wonwoo knows you’re close. Blacks out as he eats you like he’s been starving, his face so slick with spit and you it drips down his chin to the sheets. Doesn’t dare stop to breathe as he feels your legs begin to shudder over his shoulders. He watches the way you look down at him, brows pinched pleasure, waits for your lips to fall apart with a broken sob before licking into you so deep. He can’t tell who comes first, can’t tell who the enormous wet patch on the mattress belongs to, doesn’t fucking care, just wants to keep you. 

He moves over you when you’re done, pressing chaste kisses to the corner of your mouth, to your cheeks, to your temple, before you’re giggling and pulling his body next to yours. 

“Shift over,” he says, tapping at your hip. “Don’t wanna sleep in the wet patch.”

“Did you come again?” you ask, moving to the side to give him space.

Wonwoo nods, cheeks instantly flushing with heat. But there’s no need for embarrassment because you’re sucking in a breath. Seriously, you say “You have no idea how much I like that.”

He doesn’t reply, just fits his body against yours and presses a kiss to your shoulder. Lets your words wash over him. Sleep comes for him quicker than he wants it, but not before he slides his hand into yours, not before telling you he missed you too. 

· · ─────── ·𖥸· ─────── · ·

Mascara stains Wonwoo’s pillowcase but right now he doesn’t care. It’s still too early, still dark outside, but this room is hot, his breath is hot, your leg thrown over his waist is hot, and he’s considering just how monumental this is. It’s been almost four years since you touched him like this. In school it started with a ‘one kiss won’t ruin us’ and ended just before university with a ‘are we still friends?’ Way back then you both swore blind that you could just go back to your regular scheduled programming and nothing had to change. An agreement that those brief months you had (not quite) together in high school were just two best friends helping each other out. A mutual understanding that the love you share is completely and utterly platonic, and platonic friends can totally kiss/touch/fuck for a few months without it ruining something more special than sex. Except he didn’t really mean it. The trouble was that Wonwoo knew even then that he wanted something all consuming. Felt it with you. Wasn’t sure if you wanted the same.

Wonwoo is absolutely not spiralling. 

You’re still sound asleep (always are after nights like the last), and his arm is trapped. Back then he’d use this time to bask in you. With you wrapped up in him it was easy to feel like you were completely his. He used to feel like he could do anything to you, and you’d let him. You’d want it, even. Didn’t actually want to take you over but knowing that he could– the intensity of that scared him. Now that feeling doesn’t come, maybe because you’ve had the separation of time and different lovers, he doesn’t know really. He still doesn’t understand what happened before university. Doesn’t get why you stopped coming over when he was so close to unbottling the feelings in his chest. Just knows that the conversation took him by surprise even after a week of distance. Just knows how his chest ached even as he agreed that it’d be sensible to put it all to bed before leaving your sleepy town for the big city. Knows how his gut twisted sharp when you said that just because you were going together didn’t mean you should go together. Maybe he should’ve protested then, showed you how much he needed you. Impossibilities stretch out before him– if it went that way, last night wouldn’t have happened, he wouldn’t be tracing tiny figures of eight on the small of your back right now. If you’d been together then, young and stupid, would you have stood the test of time?

You stir, half roused, and Wonwoo swallows the lump in his throat, choosing to be grateful for the now. He pulls your waist closer, runs his hand under your thigh to gently adjust the weight. Your eyes are still closed but you make a soft sound of surprise. 

“What time is it?” you ask, voice thick with sleep.

“Too early,” he whispers back. “Go back to sleep.” 

“I was dreaming,” you murmur. 

“What about?” 

Your smile is lazy against his skin. “Can’t tell you,” you say. “You’d run away.”

Wonwoo thinks hard about this. “I don’t run away,” he says, quiet and serious. 

You blink open soft eyes to look at him, and Wonwoo feels too much. “Your face is all frozen, Wonwoo,” you say, gentle. “Are you okay?”

“Kiss me. Wish me good morning.” Wonwoo’s voice comes out with more edge than he intends. Doesn’t sound like his own. Feels cheap, something sleazy. Feels tragically guilty about it until he sees the look on your face. Like you want to eat him.

Your gaze is dark when you lock eyes with him. Push up with your hands, straddling his hips, his cock against your rear. You take his hands, larger than yours, place them on your ribcage, push them down down down, making goosebumps pebble along in his wake, until he’s using his thumbs to spread you apart. A little wet already, leaves a slick mark on his skin. He sighs at the sight of it. Your breath comes harder when he plays with your clit. You lean over, say– “Good morning, Wonwoo.” Press a delicate kiss to his top lip. “You’re gonna come inside me this time, okay?”

Wonwoo isn’t religious, but he feels like angels made you for him. Tells you so, and you gasp against his mouth. The way you kiss him this time is anything but angelic. Wet. Messy. Sharp teeth leaving imprints on his lips. It hurts. Nice in a way it shouldn’t be. A relief– the way the hurt makes his mind stop. You roll your hips against him and he makes a desperate sort of noise. Keeps his eyes focused on his fingers drawing circles on your clit. Your hands reach behind you to stroke his hardening cock and he arches into your touch. “Needy,” you chastise. Wonwoo nods. 

Doesn’t want it like this. Wants you under him, wants to fuck you slow. Tells you so, the words come anguished, almost– and you nod dumbly. You don’t drag out the build up. Lay on your back, open your legs for him, spread them wide and line his cock up with your wet heat so quick he doesn’t have time to overthink. He makes a strangled sound when he pushes inside. The slide is agonisingly slow. He’s being so careful, as if you’d crack like china - fragile beneath him. You clench around his cock, thick and scalding- God, it’s sweet torture. Wants more of it. 

You pull, desperate, at his waist, rolling your hips against him but he’s pulling out. This time he just slides the head in, hisses, teases, and back out. He does it again, and again, doesn’t know who this teasing is for. He’s licking into your mouth, pressing hungry kisses on your open lips, eating up all your noises, your whines, your soft moans. Things are still the same. He likes going so so deep into you, bottoming out and grinding his skin against your clit, likes when your moan comes muffled in his open wet mouth. It’s the same. Likes when your hands find purchase in the sheets, fist them in desperation, likes when you feel it’s not enough so you grab at his, intertwine your fingers and let him fuck you like this. Like you’re in love. It’s still the same.

“How do you feel, angel?” 

“Uh–” A pause to suck in a fractured breath.

“Tell me how you feel,” he says. Almost begging. Would be mortifying if he whispered that against anyone else’s cheek. Can feel the wetness there too. 

“Homesick,” you gasp. “I feel homesick.”

He fucks you harder then, driving into you so deep he could be part of you. Melt in, blend together, blur the lines, weave the fucking branches. You’re full of spells, he thinks. Made of magic. Doesn’t realise until after that he’s said it aloud. Wet starshine eyes on his as you come apart, pussy pulsing around his cock, impossibly wet, telling him come with me baby, babbling nonsense about how you want it inside, how you need it so bad, how he makes you feel so good. 

Wonwoo really looks at you before he comes. Takes a moment to commit your face to memory. Any time could be the last and he needs this– needs you– to stay with him. Doesn’t know if he’ll ever be the same. 

“Like that, Wonwoo” you’re saying, all breathy and high-pitched as he spills into you with a choked whine. “Like when you–” Cum slips out around his cock and he gathers it up on his fingers. Pushes them into your mouth to stop you talking. Can’t bear it. Can’t bear the way your pupils blow out and you lick the cum from his fingers. Can’t stand how his name sounds in your mouth, sweeter, more precious, because there’s something like love coating it. God, he wants to be yours. 

· · ─────── ·𖥸· ─────── · ·

Wonwoo likes your apartment better. Likes the way your sheets start to smell like him too. You’ve always carved out space for him but this time it’s deeper. Likes showering with you here, not to fuck, just to wash away the mess you make of each other. Likes holding you in his arms under the stream, running the lather across your skin, loving kisses pressed against your forehead. Lately he stays here more often than he goes home.

You haven’t said the words yet, neither has he. Doesn’t want to push too much too soon. 

It’s just after nine on Sunday morning, and you’re out of– well, pretty much everything. He offers to go but you insist he stays in bed, hair messed up, sheets pooling in his bare lap, glasses slipping down his nose while he rereads Kafka on the Shore. “Stay just like that,” you say it like a demand, but you’re smiling, pulling a scarf around your neck to run down the street to the shop, maybe stop at the deli for breakfast. “Back in a bit, don’t move an inch.”

A few minutes go by when the shrill of the telephone in the living room punctuates the silence. Wonwoo doesn’t get up to answer, it’d be improper, what if it was your mother? So he lets it ring through to answerphone, and when it clicks on it takes him a moment to recognise the voice calling your name. 

“Are you there? Pick up, darling, pick up.” Wonwoo knows Hongseok has been trying to get back together with you. You’d mentioned it a few weeks ago, how he’d sent flowers. You don’t even like roses.

“I saw you by the river yesterday,” he says. Wonwoo looks up, stares at the wall. You’d insisted on getting out of the apartment, pulled your bodies from soft sheets and into soft sweaters, and Wonwoo only complained a little bit. In truth he loved walking with you. That he can hold your hand in public and no one bats an eye. Loves that you can be his here, that you claim him too. “You’re with him now? How long, darling? Does he fuck you like I do? ” 

Wonwoo scoffs. Hongseok is just jealous. Wonwoo gets it. He does. Even if he’d never dream of saying it.

Hongseok’s voice turns nasty now. “Do you think he’ll stay this time? Does he know you’ve been in love with him this whole time? Everyone else knows. He won’t love you properly, you know. He’s just using you like last time, is he still keeping you a secret? You don’t deserve that, darling. You don’t deserve to be hidden–”

 Is that what you thought? That he hid you? Bile swirls in Wonwoo’s stomach. Does he do that? Did he hurt you?

“–he’s just gonna fuck you up again and you’re gonna be miserable. But he won’t let you be happy with anyone, will he? Selfish fucking prick, he’s so cruel to you. You don’t see it, do you? It’s pathetic how fucking dumb you are for him–”

Wonwoo didn’t think he was cruel. There is spit pooling in his mouth, his stomach churns. Is he cruel to you?

The line clicks off as Hongseok spits out every name under the sun, but Wonwoo doesn’t hear the rest as he retches into your bathroom sink. 

· · ─────── ·𖥸· ─────── · ·

Forty minutes later, you’re calling out to Wonwoo that you’re home as you kick off your shoes. “I got us bagels, do you want the salmon cream cheese or the egg and ba- oh! You’re up.”

Wonwoo sits on your sofa in soft sweats and a baggy white t-shirt. His skin and hair are damp from the shower. The whites of his eyes are bloodshot. “You okay?” you ask, tentatively. 

“Hmm,” he says. “Didn’t feel too good earlier.”

“Poor you,” you say. “Will breakfast make you feel better?”

“No, sorry,” he says, his voice uncharacteristically stiff. “I think I should head home. Don’t wanna give you a bug.”

You laugh softly, unpacking the groceries from the bags. “You spat in my mouth last night, if you’ve got something then I’ll have it in no time,” you say. “C’mon, stay. I’ll look after you. I’ll make soup.”

But Wonwoo is already standing, pulls a little money from his wallet and leaves it on the table. “What’s that for?”

“Breakfast,” he says. “Feel bad you bought all this and I need to go.”

You frown. “Stop being strange, I don’t care about the food, just get the next one.”

Wonwoo sighs. He’s annoyed, you realise. This is weird.

In the end you let him leave without drama, but not without a kiss to his cheek. He leans into it a little longer than usual. Closes his eyes as he hugs you goodbye. 

You eat breakfast alone. TV on, sound off, wondering what the fuck even happened before you notice the light of your answerphone flickering. 

New message, left 09:21: 

Hi Sweetheart! It’s your aunt’s birthday next week, just calling to remind you to send a card. Call me back, okay, love you, bye!

End of messages.

· · ─────── ·𖥸· ─────── · ·

sorry about the ending there :( if it helps, it does get better for them. thank you so much for reading! if you enjoyed, please consider reblogging so my fic can get seen outside my own little space <3 i love seeing your feedback. if you'd prefer to scream at me directly, feel free to send me a message <3 ily, goodnight!

[mcflymemes]

AS SAID BY KARLACH *  assorted dialogue from baldur's gate 3

i can't tell if you're flirting or threatening me. i'll take either one.

don't want the youths to think i'm not, you know, up with the times.

sometimes i look at you, and i just don't have words for this feeling. you are everything i ever hoped for. everything i thought i could never have. never deserve.

i just love listening to you speak.

i know i can make you melt.

i want all of you.

i don't think i have it in me to share.

will you stay with me? when it's time.

what the fuck is happening to us?

you know, [name], i'm not sure i can trust you anymore. you're... different. a bit scary, to be honest.

i'm sweating bullets. what if i blow our cover?

it's good to see you smiling, [name].

look at you. the years have been good to you.

we're in the city on some urgent business, but can i come find you when it's all settled?

whose idea was this? was it mine? am i insane?

i'll rip your tongue out, you liar.

you can't possibly believe this shit.

what i wouldn't give for another hour together. another minute.

i can't believe you saw that. you're too young for that.

once you start, it's hard to stop.

now there's a name i'd hoped never to hear again.

this is it. i can practically taste his blood from here.

you're asking a lot. but i can wait - for a while, at least.

i don't want to put you in harm's way either. i'll wait for now.

now you're speaking my language.

sorry i haven't visited. i've been... away. but i'm back now! and i brought friends.

i miss you so much. but i'm happy. and getting up to some really important shit.

i just want to understand. i just want to know why.

the fucker has to die.

this handwriting looks familiar.

do you know what you're doing?

sorry, i think you have the wrong person.

would you believe me if I said i've got to save the city?

i love good news.

glad to see you're so well set-up here.

if we can help them, we will.

could i see your wares?

you'll still be able to do your wizard thing, though, right?

i wouldn't mind doing a little shopping in the city.

to have someone who cares about you and throw them away... i don't know how you do it.

sounds like more your thing than mine.

i was just thinking the same thing, but less poetically.

you're good at staying in character. i'll give you that.

i was just being nice.

what a pesthole. can't wait to clear this place out.

i smell a fight brewing.

care for a dip?

it looks good on you.

good to know love is on the table though.

how could we let this happen?

let's just keep moving. i don't want to talk.

this place is absolutely beautiful. what a wonder.

hey, can i try something on you?

my heart isn't a toy, got it? treat it like one and you're going to get burned. badly.

my heart is telling me i love you.

if i didn't know better, i'd say you're falling in love.

will you excuse me?

you'd better step away before i do something i regret.

i'm glad you chose me.

you give me chills, baby.

i'm not going anywhere. i've got plans for the future, you know. and they involve you.

to be honest, i'm kind of shocked you chose me.

if i can have you back, i've got a place for you here. cozy. warm. safe. and you can stay as long as you want.

it sounds like you really meant it.

revenge sounds so sweet until you've taken it. then all you have is... no one left to blame.

you know, for a while there, i wasn't sure you'd come back. but look at you. you've done what few could ever do - created your own path.

is it almost time for dinner?

don't tease me. my lonesome heart can't take it.

you really are the best of the best. of the best.

you know i'd do just about anything for you.

if he lays a finger on you, i'll break it off. that's a promise.

what's on your mind?

you and me. let's imagine. we have a whole life ahead of us. what do we do?

i'd love for you to show me where you came from. hear your stories. meet your people.

no moment is guaranteed. except this one. and this one. and maybe this one too.

i'm going to live. i get to be alive. i get to stay.

i've never felt better. like i'm finally complete.

and here i thought you had half a brain. how wrong i was!

i love you. and i know you'll choose your destiny, and choose it well.

you're lucky i love you.

you hear me? you're all i could ever ask for.

come on. there's something i want to show you upstairs.

i will miss you. but i wish you luck.

[eemamminy-art]

Things took a turn for the worse today during her treatments and we had to put our kitty to sleep. Please don't ask me for details. We did all we could, but satisfying your curiosity isn't worth me recounting the details over and over to everyone who wants to know. Just know we had no other choice and it was frankly devastating.

I'm going to take the rest of the week off and get back to my comms on monday. It's been a long couple of weeks as it is and this week especially the days have been long. Tomorrow will be another long day to bury her.

some further personal stuff below the cut about death and loss

I feel like every time I lose someone else in my life I'm retraumatized and shattered into more pieces than I was before. My whole world broke completely when my mom died. Then 8 months later my dad died too, and I just remember getting the call to come to the hospital immediately because there wasn't much time left and thinking, "This can't be happening again." Getting the call today about our cat, it's all I could think of too. "This can't be happening again."

Since losing my mom in 2013 and my dad in 2014, I've lost all four grandparents, two uncles, and now my cat. I hate that it's such a familiar routine now. I feel so thoroughly soaked through by death that I will never truly get through it. Like I'm rotting away too, little by little.

I try to take solace in how my dad had this outlook of like, to not linger in the past or linger on the things we can't change. I try to do that. I try to just look forward. When I look forward though, sometimes all I can see is my own death waiting for me. I treat my body so badly when I'm in the thickest muck of sorrow and I know it just burns the candle of my life quicker, but what else am I going to do?

I hate having to tell everyone about it. Yeah hi me again. You'll never guess, someone else died. I know, you're sorry, thanks, it's okay. In the uber ride home I was writing to all my friends who have been checking in on me to tell them what's happened, trying not to throw up, and I'm instantly 22 again, calling my aunts and uncles and cousins at 6 am after being up all night to let everyone know my dad was gone.

I draw and write about these topics often because I'm trying so hard to heal from them and make sense of them. If I can write about fictional characters overcoming their trauma and grief and finding light and happiness again, it gives me some hope that I'll find that one day too. Still waiting, but maybe I'll find it. Though it seems I can't even have peace in my creative outlets when time and again I have people making it about stupid ship wars and antagonizing me and belittling me for what I'm making when I'm just trying to work through all the tragedies of my life through my art and writing. Life isn't fair and then stuff like that happens and I remember people don't care how much you've lost or suffered sometimes, they only care about themselves.

I'm sure this is all very worrying to read but ultimately I'm just venting after experiencing something terrible after a lifetime of other terrible experiences. I'll be okay. I always come through. I'm not a quitter. If you read all of this, then thank you. Please be gentle with me. My light will probably dimmer for the foreseeable future but I'll be okay. You probably noticed I didn't mention many details about my cat. That was on purpose. It's hard enough feeling her absence, trying to articulate all the things that made her so special and that I will miss in her is going to make me even sicker than I already am. So please don't ask. If I want to talk about her I will, but right now it's so difficult, and more than anything my body is just reacting to having the trauma of death coursing through it yet again.

[ot3]

tossed several hundred more words onto my big neopets post today and got distracted stumbling through jellyneos image database on a tangent. There's so much good and fun neopets art I'd love to talk about I feel like I could spend forever doing it. Gotta keep my eyes on the prize though and stay the course on the color rankings to finish it up. Maybe someday in the distant future I'll talk about the neodeck cards. In the meantime let's all look at chia phantom of the opera

[lynnie-s3all]

Two time x angel!reader maybe one associated with spawn somehow??? Perchance????

SHIT.

( i had to use a bit of chatgpt for some dialogues cause I'm trying to write good. I'm being honest in here.)

In devotion to save my own self...

Two time x Angel reader

Okay first of all, let's talk about respawning.

𝚋𝚊𝚜𝚎𝚍 𝚘𝚏𝚏 𝚖𝚢 𝚝𝚑𝚎𝚘𝚛𝚢:

Respawning is somewhat a belief where you can gain immortality from it. Once you die, your body can ressurect itself and gain back another life. Which means, no matter how many times you die, you would always go back to life. The process is painful on each step you die, and it will repeat itself.

This then had people being devoted onto it, making this a cult of believing that if you pray to the gods above, they would give extra lives each time you die. And it's unstoppable.

Well what about you? You're an angel, and you have little bits of knowledge about this belief, well i guess i would say you're associated with that.

Well little did you know that there's someone lurking and being interested towards you...

They looked at you with a smile, trying to say hello to your existence. You would guessed that they would have come from a cult. Which you did noticed that when you saw their shirt.

When they tried to speak themselves out, he would say it in some fancy type of accent. You barely know half of what he was saying but you didn't really understand him that much. Only a bit.

"Forgive my outburst, but I am truly enchanted by your radiant presence. I have never beheld such ethereal loveliness in all my days. Are you indeed real, or am I bewitched by the most splendid illusion known to mortal sight?"

Okay... probably not like that??

Two time: "Wow, I've never seen anything like you before. You're beautiful."

Angel: "Thank you, that's kind of you to say. But I'm just an ordinary angel."

Two time: "Are you real? I mean, I can't quite believe it."

Angel: "It's okay, I understand. Yes, I'm real. Don't worry, I'm not an illusion."

The two of you gradually begin to spend more and more time talking to each other. As the days go by, their conversations become more frequent and consuming until the point where they can no longer break free from one another's company. Their desire to be together becomes so strong that Two time starts to neglect the other cult members and disappears for extended periods just to spend time with you. This obsession with each other has reached a point where it has become risky to both their responsibilities and the cult they are a part of.

They would slowly grew more devoted towards you, such as through prayer, offering gifts, and expressing their loyalty and respect on you.

When they are deeply devoted to you, they might even sacrifice something important to them in order to please the deity or demonstrate their devotion.

And if they were to sacrifice someone to gain another life... They would need a host. Their closest friend.

Two Time: "I did something terrible. I sacrificed my friend to gain another life.

Angel: "I see... and how do you feel about what you've done?"

Two Time: "I feel guilty. I know it was wrong, but I didn't know what else to do."

Angel: "You made a very difficult and morally challenging decision. But there is always a choice, and you made the wrong one."

Two Time: "I know. I just wish I could take it back."

Angel: "Time cannot be reversed. But you can learn from your mistake and make better decisions in the future. Everyone makes mistakes, but it's your actions and choices going forward that define you.

Two Time: "I'll try to do better. I just don't know if I can ever forgive myself for what I did."

He was guilty. He knows that.

I'm not sure if i want to continue this to be honest...

[scoops404]

I enjoyed writing it but it's not going to go anywhere I don't think, so here's the first 1000 words or so of a centaur!Dream/humanprince!George fic that I will probably never finish. but if I do, i'll put it on ao3

The human king’s son intrigues him. After the week long debates and endless back and forth about land rights and who can do what on each square foot of the plains, Dream has tuned out the current issue to stare at the young prince.

Humans look so strange. If he didn’t already know of their prowess, the ruthlessness that they show that allows them to be the apex predators in their areas, he’d think they were just goofy looking. He’d think humans were incapable of hunting anything at all.

How can they run fast enough to catch a gazelle on only two legs? How do they not freeze in the winter with no fur to cover their bodies? How do they protect themselves with no back legs to kick?

Dream can’t figure it out, but he can’t deny their prominence.

The human leader, called a king, brought his son and more of his court in order to peacefully negotiate an agreement between their peoples. Too many centaurs had been slaughtered for “trespassing” on lands that had belonged to them for centuries. And, in turn, too many humans had been run down and stampled in retaliation.

It’s a good thing, these negotiations, they’re just endlessly boring. Dream isn’t the chief. He’s not even the foal of the chief. His father is a warrior with an injury that keeps him from his former profession, and his mother is one of the best healers in the village. But they aren’t important, by any means.

And yet the chief specifically asked for Dream to be here at these talks. He’s the youngest centaur by far. If humans age at the same rate as centaurs, then he’s probably one of the youngest from both parties. With the exception of the prince-ling.

Most of the centaurs have brown hair and matching tails. Their fur is brown, maybe with spots of white, but predominantly that’s what they look like. The humans, from what he can observe, are much the same. A lot of brown hair and tan skin.

The prince, though. His hair is dark—as dark as shadow. But his skin is as pale as the moon. The combination is striking, and Dream hasn’t been able to get him out of his mind since the first day of the negotiations.

Even in their breaks, when Dream sleeps, the prince is there with his pursed mouth and his slender hips.

In one of his dreams, the prince morphed into a centaur and Dream chased him on the open prairie in the way of their people—a courting ritual. When he woke up, his hooves were still moving like the chase hadn’t stopped, like he hadn’t caught him at all.

He hadn’t felt himself until they were back at the negotiation meets and he could lay eyes on the prince.

He never speaks. Though, neither does Dream. It’s clear both of them are not here for their opinion. They are not asked for it and neither offer it up freely. Dream can only imagine he’s here to make the centaurs look young and fierce. He knows he looks intimidating, though his heart is far from.

He’s big, even for a centaur. His legs are longer and his arms thick with corded muscle. His arrows fly farther and his words are quick off his tongue, clever and witty. He knows he’s impressed the chief over the years, but it’s an honor to be chosen to be here, to be the face ofthe future of the centaurs.

While Dream is cantering in his thoughts, the chief makes moves to end the meeting. He focuses his thoughts back on what’s happening to hear that they have been successful and there is to be a leaving feast tonight for their guests.

Dream’s eyes seek out the prince, a habit newly formed but he knows will be hard to break. There’s just something so beguiling about him.

In the break before the feast, Dream returns home to change out of his armor, per the chief’s request. They are no longer putting up a tough front, but now intend to show their hospitality. Centaurs pride themselves on the tradition.

Two boars have been carefully hunted and cooked, an impressive meal to befit a king. Boars are known to kill humans unless they have enough numbers to overwhelm the beasts. Centaurs, though, need only their own legs and a few arrows. They don’t usually hunt boar unless there are too many in the territory, as they always practice good stewardship of the land, but this occasion called for something special.

The chief greets their guests with less formality than the previous week’s interactions. Wine flows freely and Dream is even allowed a few sips. He doesn’t care much for the bitter taste, but he likes the way the alcohol rushes to his head.

Centaurs don’t sit to eat, obviously. But humans do. In order to accommodate them, without also making them feel lower than the hosts, the master craftsmen built a high table for them. It’s essentially a table set up on a raised platform so that the humans didn’t have to climb ladders just to reach chairs to be at the same head level as the centaurs, but it was still a feat. They didn’t even have tables before their guests arrived.

Why would they?

“Dream,” the chief calls when conversation has been ongoing for an hour or so.

Dream lifts up his head in acknowledgement, heart rate speeding up. He doesn’t care for the attention.

The chief points to him with a gesture of his arm. He’s talking to the king, the princeling on his right. Both of their matching dark eyes stare over at Dream. He shifts between his back legs with unease.

“Dream is one of strongest warriors,” the chief tells them in a boastful voice. “He is young, but has much potential.”

The king eyes him warily. There are streaks of gray at his temple. He doesn’t look like a man who has ever had fun before in his life. Such a shame.

“He looks powerful, indeed,” the king says when it’s clear the chief is waiting for an answer. Dream can feels his eyes tracking along his body, like he’s evaluating him like one of their horses! How humiliating. “What is he, seventeen hands?”

The silence is staggering. Dream recoils.

“Father,” the prince says, breaking the awkward silence. “Warrior Dream is not measured in hands. Our allies, the centaurs, measure themselves much the same way we do.”

It’s a gentle chide, but gets the point across. The king doesn’t admit he made a mistake, but he changes the subject to something else. But the prince’s eyes burn into Dream’s hot face. He looks back and falls deep inside his gaze.

[archive-of-the-lost]

Finally getting around to doing this XD I'm happy so many people mentioned me, I didn't expect this at all!

My birthday is on June 25. I'm a cancer!

My favourite ships!

@rav--en x Jade (The only matchup I've done for you so far. I would love to do a MHA matchup with you in the future tho! Perhaps a YLIF if you're up for it ^^)

@tillichan x Megumi (you clearly like him a lot and you both would look so cute together!), Atsushi (he could be tied with Megumi for my favourite Tilli ship), Yukimiya (the vibes are immaculate)

@alt--er--love x Reiner (you two were made for each other XD)

@sugutoad x Jesper (Maybe its because of the confession scene I wrote but I find this ship cuter despite thinking you and Percy are more compatible. Also, I'm still excited to do a BSD YLIF trade with you, but swamped with requests to finish rn. I'll message you as soon as I'm free enough to do a trade!)

@mysteriawrites x Denki (you guys are so compatible, I'll die on this hill)

@eternalera x Caitlyn (one of the few instances where I liked a ship with the childhood friends to lovers trope :0 ! ), Shinso (possibly the cutest matchup I've ever written I was smiling while writing it)

@lady-of-endless x Levi, Mirio (you guys are soooo cute together!)

♡ I enjoy doing matchups for all of the fandoms I do trades for! But for YLIF, I especially like BSD, MHA, PJO and Grishaverse. ^^

♡ I've been considering matchup trades for Squid Game, Mashle, Doctor Stone, Alien Stage and maybe Arcane but I'm not sure how well that would work out in practice. It'd also be great to find more people wanting to do Grishaverse and PJO YLIF trades. ^^

♡ I've got so many event ideas for this blog but it takes time and effort and college takes priority 😔 That being said, I do have an idea for an interview event like one of the YLIF options Tilli recently added. A whole event where characters talk about why they like the requester, what they think of them etc. For TWST specifically, I've got an idea for a merfolk AU where all the characters are merfolk in a research facility... But that idea will be harder to execute because I need to worldbuild and talk about the worldbuilding. Which means fanfiction posts to prep for the event itself. ✨

♡ Aurora x Akutagawa, stalker Nikolai heheh (BSD), Aurora x Nikolai (Grishaverse), Aurora x Jason (HOO) (Anna, you sold me on these ships so well), Aurora x Sae (BLLK), Aurora x Azul (TWST), Aurora x Geto (JJK)

Open tag! Anyone can join if they wish ^^

⋅˚₊‧ Matchup Tag Game ‧₊˚ ⋅

Good day, my dears! ૮₍´˶• . • ⑅ ₎ა I really want to get to know you all better and want to read about your matchup ideas! So I decided to do this little tag game, so we can get to know each other and find some new exchangers! Feel free to join or not answer, no pressure, dears!

♡ Your Birthday. Because I'm really curios and want to congratulate you!

♡ (mutual) x (character) is canon

♡ I always enjoy doing matchups/your life in fandom for (fandom(s))

♡ I really want to do matchups/your life in fandom exchange for (fandom(s)), but almost no one writes for this fandom(s).

♡ I have a writing exchange idea, please, do it with me! (describe your idea, maybe there are writers who would like to do it with you, me, for example x))

♡ My favorite selfships.

Aaand, I'm starting!~

♡ My Birthday is on 20 of July.

♡ @rav--en x Rafayel (LAD) This is my favorite match, I already hear wedding bells.

@archive-of-the-lost x Akutagawa Ryuunosuke (BSD) My badass Port Mafia couple. My second one is you x Gogol, our favorite stalker. x)

@ethereal-moonglow x Dazai Osamu (BSD) You can fix him, girl! x) Actually, my current favorite ship is you x Blue Lock character, but this is a secret now! x)

@loveaurdeepression x Sylus (LAD) My dear Mother of 109 Zone, I enjoyed doing this matchup!

@babulejka x Alexis Ness (Blue Lock) The sweetest couple! Can't wait to do Fluffy Valentine for you two!

@kittywhoo x Isagi Yoichi (Blue Lock) Match made in heaven princess x her whipped worshiper. x)

@alt--er--love x Geto Suguru (Jujutsu Kaisen) The most romantic matchup I've ever done.

@mysteriawrites x TBA (LAD) Because no spoilers for your matchup! x)

Ask me if you want to be added to this list! ♡

♡ I always enjoy doing matchups/your life in fandom for Love and Deepspace, Blue Lock and Jujutsu Kaisen!

♡ I really want to do matchups/your life in fandom exchange for Servamp and Fruits Basket (I'm really want to comfort every single character of this story), but almost no one writes for this fandoms.

♡ Currently I really enjoy doing extra headcanons for Your life in fandom! You can check options list here: (click). If you want to do something extra or have your original idea for Your life in fandom, just let me know! I'm always in!

♡ Tilli x Megumi Fushiguro, Okkotsu Yuta (Jujutsu Kaisen), Tilli x Xavier (Love and Deepspace), Tilli x Licht Todoroki (Servamp).

Tags: @frostfall-matches @archive-of-the-lost @kittywhoo @ethereal-moonglow @babulejka @mysteriawrites @alt--er--love (please, feel free to join if you want or don't do this! newcomers are always welcome!)

[ro-bee]

You say it can be rare for Goat to be kind to wolf Nari how does Goat usually act with wolf Narinder?

TOXIC YAOYURI!!

no but i think i said somewhere how complicated they are haha

goat has mixed feelings for wolf because they're still really angry at wolf for what happened in the past (they need someone to blame since the bishops aren't here anymore) but wolf is also the only person that knows them well enough that they feel kinda safe with him.

on the other hand wolf is really people pleaser... he feels guilty for what happend to goat and ofthen let them do and treat him ovewer they want without complaining (but i think he would react if goat really exagerate with their vendetta)

so yeah is this whole mess... maybe they can get fixed

but anyway

[satsuha]

i've been thinking about nahyuta's title as the "last rites prosecutor" because i think it's an interesting part of his character that's immediately apparent from his first appearance... in japanese it's written as トムライの検事 (tomurai no kenji) with tomurai meaning funeral/burial. this is pretty self-explanatory considering his tendency to pray for the victim but i actually think it's really interesting that the localization opted for the term "last rites" instead

last rites are a specifically christian practice of praying for the dying to absolve them of their sins before they die - in other words, prayers given to the deceased wouldn't be considered last rites (x)

this is a pretty blatant contradiction of the original's meaning and what nahyuta actually does in the game but i think it's interesting to consider that the person he might be praying for is the defendant (and under khura'in's DC act, the defense as well), not the victim... even outside of khura'in we see that those who are proven guilty in murder trials are executed, and we know that nahyuta has been acting as a prosecutor under ga'ran, almost definitely sending several rebels and defense attorneys to their deaths in the process.

it would just be really tragic if his habit of praying came out of desperation at being forced to send innocents or even former comrades/friends to their deaths... whether it being interpreted as a funeral rite for the victim arose from the people around him or as another act of desperation from nahyuta to cover his actual intentions doesn't matter as much since i think one would have led to the other anyway...

[bowshaowow]

hi!! this is super random but i remember you posted about an AU some time ago, i was wondering if there's anywhere i could read more about it?? thank you for all the food btw!

thank you very much for the ask!! omg i cant believe you actually remember the AU thank you........ 😭😭😭 thank you for always looking at my art too, i'm glad you're enjoying them!

(this is the link to the AU post btw if anyone is wondering)

it's basically a really self-indulgent double identity AU thingy that i've been working on for a little while now! basically they play instruments but also live an assassin / politician lifestyle hehe... but they meet as normal people who just so happened to have a common interest in playing music, and that's how they started to know each other

tbh i've actually been trying to write an actual story about it but i haven't really been satisfied with the direction of some sections OTL... but this is the basic premise of it for now...!

(i posted it before in the dark corners of read-more LOL but here it is again if you missed it; but honestly i love the idea of assassin nagisa too much asdhjk)

here's a couple of doodles i did a little while ago about this AU too since i posted them on twitter as well... it's just some several snippets into this AU but i hope you like them 🥺

[serpentface]

Do you conlang? I was wondering if you had naming languages (or possibly even more developed ones) for pulling the words you use. I tried to search your blog but didn't find anything, wouldn't be surprised if the feature is just busted tho. Your worldbuilding is wonderful and I particularly enjoy the anthropological and linguistic elements.

Ok the thing is I had kind of decided I was not going to do any conlanging because I don't feel like I'm equipped to do a good job of it, like was fully like "I'm just going to do JUST enough that it doesn't fail an immediate sniff test and is more thoughtful than just keysmashing and putting in vowels". And then have kinda been conlanging anyway (though not to a very deep and serious extent. I maybe have like....an above average comprehension of how language construction works via willingness to research, but that's not saying much, also I can never remember the meanings of most linguistic terms like 'frictives' or etc off the top of my head. I'm just kinda raw dogging it with a vague conceptualization of what these things mean)

I do at least have a naming language for Wardi (and more basic rules for other established languages) but the rudimentary forms of it were devised with methods much shakier and less linguistically viable than even the most basic naming language schemes, and I only went back over it LONG after I had already made a bunch of words so there's some inconsistencies with consonant presence and usage. (This can at least be justified because it IS a language that would have a lot of loanwords and would be heavily influenced by other language groups- Burri being by far the most significant, Highland-Finnic and Yuroma-Lowlands also being large contributors)

The 'method' I used was:

-Skip basic construction elements and fully move into devising necessary name words, with at least a Vibe of what consonants are going to be common and how pronunciation works -Identify some roots out of the established words and their meanings. Establish an ongoing glossary of known roots/words. -Construct new words based in root words, or as obvious extensions/variants of established words. -Get really involved in how the literal meanings of some words might not translate properly to english, mostly use this to produce a glossary of in-universe slang. -Realize that I probably should have at least some very basic internal consistency at this point. -Google search tutorials on writing a naming language. -Reverse engineer a naming language out of established words, and ascribe all remaining inconsistencies to being loanwords or just the mysteries of life or whatever.

I do at least have some strongly established pronunciation rules and a sense of broad regional dialect/accents.

-'ai' words are almost always pronounced with a long 'aye' sound.

-There is no 'Z' or 'X' sound, a Wardi speaker pronouncing 'zebra' would go for 'tsee-brah', and would attempt 'xylophone' as 'ssye-lohp-hon'

-'V' sounds are nearly absent and occur only in loanwords, and tend to be pronounced with a 'W' sound. 'Virsum' is a Highland word (pronounced 'veer-soom') denoting ancestry, a Wardi speaker would go 'weer-sum'.

-'Ch' spellings almost always imply a soft 'chuh' sound when appearing after an E, I, or O (pelatoche= pel-ah-toh-chey), but a hard 'kh' sound after an A or U (odomache= oh-doh-mah-khe). When at the start of a word, it's usually a soft 'ch' unless followed by an 'i' sound (chin (dog) is pronounced with a hard K 'khiin', cholem (salt) is pronounced with a soft Ch 'cho-lehm')

-Western Wardin has strong Burri cultural and linguistic influence, and a distinct accent- one of the most pronounced differences is use of the ñ sound in 'nn' words. The western city of Ephennos is pronounced 'ey-fey-nyos' by most residents, the southeastern city of Erubinnos is pronounced 'eh-roo-been-nos' by most residents. Palo's surname 'Apolynnon' is pronounced 'A-puh-lee-nyon' in the Burri and western Wardi dialects (which is the 'proper' pronunciation, given that it's a Kos name), but will generally be spoken as 'Ah-poh-leen-non' in the south and east.

-R's are rolled in Highland-Finnic words. Rolling R's is common in far northern rural Wardi dialects but no others. Most urban Wardi speakers consider rolling R's sort of a hick thing, and often think it sounds stupid or at least uneducated. (Brakul's name should be pronounced with a brief rolled 'r', short 'ah' and long 'uul', but is generally being pronounced by his south-southeastern compatriots with a long unrolled 'Brah' sound).

Anyway not really a sturdy construction that will hold up to the scrutiny of someone well equipped for linguistics but not pure bullshit either.

[dribs-and-drabbles]

You can't tell me that this

doesn't have the same energy as this

Nor that this

doesn't have the same energy as this

And similarly this

doesn't have the same energy as this

In that, whatever we think we're being shown in a trailer doesn't necessarily mean what we think it means.

Because surely you remember that this from the BBS ep 12 trailer

became this in the show

I don't for one second believe what we're being shown in the Last Twilight ep 12 trailer...apart from the colours, of course...because as we've seen umpteen times before, the colours don't lie.

And both Night and their mom are wearing Mhok's blue here, alongside Day who has a mixture of Mhok's blue, his own green...and Night's brown.

I haven't had time to properly write about the design of this show (oh there have been so many things I've wanted to mention) but I do think Night is colour-coded brown, as shown brilliantly in ep 10's dinner scene, with Day wearing Mhok's blue in front (because he had plans to go and see him) and Night's brown behind...because as has been shown time and again, Night has always had Day's back.

And with Night in a very vibrant blue at the end of ep 11, I firmly trust that he will have both Day and Mhok's back in ep 12, and that whatever the trailer for ep 12 is trying to make us think will happen will turn out to be another one of Aof's cleverly crafted ruses designed to make us lose our minds for a week.

Must I remind you?

NEVER TRUST A THAI TRAILER

AND CERTAINLY NOT AN AOF NOPPHARNACH EPISODE TRAILER.

[spark-circuit]

woe,

[nectaric]

something something and sex for zeus is about connection. and sex for hades is about control, and sex for poseidon is about stimulation, and sex for ares is about devotion, and sex for athena is about emotion, and sex for hera is about vulnerability, and sex for makaria is about attention, and-

[scarlettfevor]

Decided to start watching teen wolf because why not, and I'm literally only 3 episodes in and I already suspect that Scott is probably going to be my favorite, and I know that there's a thriving shipping scene for this show so I took a quick peak at the top ships on ao3 and it......Derek and Stilies...? I think that once I get over his kinda cringey early 2010's humor I could grow to like Stilies, but Derek? To me he just seems like every other sad bad boy in every twilight/Buffy-inspired teen show from the 2000's - 2010's, there is 0 chance I'll actually like him, so it's no surprise really that he seems to be fairly popular.

[fairymint]

mmm, the cheese cravings have begun™️...