#max: ??????haha. funny. yeah you’re ACTUALLY a vampire

[flowers-that-sing]

i have a vision. lucas sinclair as a vampire. max mayfield who doesn’t believe in vampires. el who knows lucas is a vampire and thinks max does too but max thinks shes being fucked with.

every time lucas tries to tell her hes a vampire she thinks its either a joke or hes trying to test out if shed be ok with knowing hes bisexual

[writingsofwerewolves]

If you’re interested in my Incomprehensible Self Indulgent Werewolf Porn, here is the first section of it.

No sex in this preview. I spent a long time setting up the plot and introducing the characters lol.

~

 “We shouldn’t be out here without one of the others,” I told Max. “Why didn’t Samuels come?”

Max grimaced, “I didn’t ask him.”

“You’re not having a fight?”

“It doesn’t matter,” Max muttered, fiddling with his tent, trying to set it up. “Besides, it isn’t a full moon and we have vampire repellent.” Max indicated the garlic necklace he wore. “You should put yours on.”

“No fucking way, dude. Would this fight with Samuels have anything to do with the fact that you constantly smell like garlic?”

“Shut up,” he grumbled, “Fine, don’t wear it. But don’t blame me when some fanger bites you!”

“I won’t, don’t worry. Besides, it’s not vampires I’m worried about out here. Mr. Peters says they all live in cities. There’s other things, though, besides werewolves and vampires.”

Max shook his head, “We don’t know that.”

“Mr. Peters’ books—”

“He’s never seen any himself. Even a lot of the werewolf myths in those books turned out to be fake, so I’m just really not that worried about fairies and imps and whatever coming to get us.”

“Shapeshifters. The books talked a lot about shapeshifters.”

“Werewolves,” Max waved a hand dismissively.

“No, these are different. Shapeshifters can change anytime. In the books, it said they target people out in the woods. Alone.”

Max shrugged, “Samuels hasn’t heard anything like that and he’s really getting into the international werewolf community now. Did you know there’s a Facebook group?”

“Sounds… unsafe,” I commented, “He didn’t join with his real name, did he?”

“Nah, we both used our fake accounts.”

“You joined too? They didn’t ask for some sort of proof of… lycanthropy?”

“No, it’s working under the guise of being a bunch of people pretending to be werewolves. They let anyone join after asking a few questions.”

“Are… are you sure it’s an actual werewolf group then?”

“Yeah, Samuels knows a few of them for real. It’s pretty easy to tell the fakers from the real thing.”

“Okay…” I said doubtfully, “Sure. What time do we have to get up for this thing?”

“Before sunrise to prepare,” Max said, temporarily giving up on his tent creation to grab the book from his bag, “Mr. Peters wrote out simplified instructions for us. We probably should find a good spot before we sleep, so we don’t have to scramble last minute.”

“And this’ll work? This spell’ll create an anti-vampire weapon?”

“Mr. Peters’ mentor did it,” Max shrugged, “Besides, you’re the one that trusts these stupid books.”

“I don’t believe every word they say, I just think we should be cautious.”

“Well, this thing is worth a shot. If we miss this chance, we can’t try again for fifty years, so…”

“I didn’t say we shouldn’t,” I frowned at him, “Well, if you’re so sure that this spell is legit and confident there won’t be any monsters out tonight, how about you track down a good location and I’ll set up the tents?”

“Deal,” he agreed, putting the book back in his pack and grabbing his lantern, “You’ve got your talkie?”

“Right here,” I confirmed, “Check in often, okay?”

“Sure, sure.”

Max’s light was soon obscured by the thick foliage.

I starting undoing the shoddy job Max had done on the tent.

Of course, Max didn’t check in soon enough for me so I contacted him.

“Everything okay?”

“Yeah, fine.”

“Call more often,” I ordered.

“Fine! Sheesh.”

I rolled my eyes and got back to work. A few seconds later, Max called.

“Is this often enough?”

“Don’t be an ass,” I told him.

He laughed before the walkie cut out.

I got one of the tents almost completely finished before I heard from Max again.

“Haha, very funny,” he drawled.

“What?” I asked, confused.

“Stop creeping. I hear you.”

“I’m… at the camp,” I said slowly, “What do you hear?”

“You’re following me. Rattling bushes and crunching leaves. You’re so funny. Now cut it out,” Max sounded a little tense.

“It’s not me,” I told him firmly, “Head back here. Now.”

“S-sure,” he said, his voice shaking slightly.

I picked up the other lantern and held it out in front of me, watching the darkness of the forest for Max. It wasn’t long before I heard his quickly approaching footsteps.

“That wasn’t funny,” he berated, doubled over panting.

“I was here,” I indicated the nearly finished tent, “Whatever you heard, wasn’t me.”

He gulped and looked back into the trees.

“Maybe we should’ve brought Samuels.”

“Obviously. But it’s too late now. Are we still doing this? Or…?”

“We have to. Without this weapon, we don’t stand a chance against the vampires. We’ll get this done. No matter what’s creeping in the woods.”

~

We decided to look for the location to do the spell after we got some sleep. After setting an alarm to wake us up an hour before sunrise, we settled into our tents and attempted to rest. All night, I heard rustling around us.

“Just the wind,” I heard Max whisper to himself, “It’s just the wind.”

I fought the urge to say ‘it’s never just the wind.’ We had weapons, so we weren’t defenseless against whatever was out there, but neither of us were particularly good fighters. That was why we needed the weapon. Of our monster fighting team, only Samuels was formally trained in combat, having been in the military, but we couldn’t rely on him.

Both of us climbed out of our tents when the alarm went off. Max looked as tired as I felt and I doubted he got any more sleep than I did. But we had a job to do so we pressed on. With the supplies and lanterns, we set off in search of a place without a thick canopy of trees overhead.

We stayed close together, both keeping our eyes and ears alert for signs of danger. It made it difficult to focus on the task and I wished we had found the location before going to sleep. We had limited time to get set up.

As we searched, I didn’t hear anything that sounded larger than a rabbit. Max jumped at every small sound, though, and I wondered if he was just skittish. Maybe he hadn’t actually heard anything before when he was alone. And maybe the sounds as we attempted to sleep really were just the wind. It wasn’t impossible.

Besides, Max was right. Mr. Peters had never seen anything other than werewolves and vampires. Samuels and his new werewolf pals didn’t know of anything else either. I didn’t think I was wrong to be cautious, but I was starting to doubt anything dangerous was in the woods with us.

With not much time to spare, we finally located a decent place for the spell. The leaves overhead opened up to the clear night sky, revealing many twinkling stars and a half moon.

We quickly pulled everything out of our bags and set up the alter, placing a silver dagger in the center of it. Max turned off his lantern so mine was the only light source, then he held an amber crystal reverently, his eyes nervous.

“You have it memorized?” I asked.

“I could recite it in my sleep,” he confirmed, though I could tell he wasn’t feeling very confident.

“You’ve got this,” I assured him. “This type of thing comes naturally to you.”

“Right…” he held the crystal directly over the silver dagger, “It’ll take about an hour. You’ll keep an eye out for things?”

“I will,” I pulled out my retractable staff and extended it, “I’ve got your back.”

Max glanced at his watch and said, “It’s time.”

“Good luck,” I told him as I turned off my lantern, plunging us into total darkness.

I heard Max take a deep breath before he began speaking in Latin. Slowly, sunlight started to bleed into the night sky above. I turned away from Max and his work to keep an eye on our surroundings. It was still dark in the trees, but I could make out shapes. I could see trees and bushes.

As sunlight slowly filled the space, I realized… one of the bushes wasn’t a bush. It was a gigantic wolf laying down, watching us.

“Fuck,” I whispered.

Behind me, Max continued to chant the spell, clearly too focused to notice anything.

The wolf rose to all fours and I gasped at its massive height. I’d seen werewolves. That wasn’t a werewolf. It had none of the humanoid features and it was much larger. Werewolves, while tall, were thin and lanky typically, with long arms and legs and only a thin covering of fur. The wolf in front of me didn’t look like a normal wolf, it was too square and bulky, but it looked all animal. No human.

It took a step towards us and I raised my staff protectively.

It paused and tilted its head.

I frowned. It had clearly been there for some time. It hadn’t attacked. Maybe it was just curious.

Suddenly, I felt an odd compulsion. Slowly, I set down my staff and knelt to the ground. I hoped Max wouldn’t turn around and see. He had to keep doing the ritual. No matter what. And I didn’t think there was an immediate threat. The wolf hadn’t done anything yet.

The wolf took another step closer and paused, watching me carefully. When I didn’t move, it stepped again. I tried to keep my eyes down, a submissive gesture. I didn’t know how much that would mean to its kind, but it was worth a shot. As it got closer, I almost automatically tilted my head to the side.

“Indigo, what the fuck!” Max yelled.

“Don’t stop!” I growled at him, not moving to look at him, “I’ve got this!”

“That’s a werewolf!”

“The spell,” I turned my head slightly to hiss at him, “Do the fucking spell!”

His eyes were wide with fear, but he nodded and started speaking in Latin again, though I saw he kept his eyes on me. I turned back to see the wolf hadn’t moved.

I lowered my head, tilting it to the side again. I wasn’t sure exactly why. I wanted to say it was because I needed it to know we weren’t a threat. We had a task and we meant no harm to it. But I knew that wasn’t why I was doing it. Something in me wanted to kneel down and reveal my neck.

The wolf moved again. Behind me, Max still spoke Latin but I could tell from his voice, he was actually shouting at me.

“Don’t stop,” I told him, “No matter what.”

His voice as he continued chanting sounded very upset, but determined. We weren’t going to mess up our one chance to have an advantage over vampires.

The wolf continued to approach. Its black fur gleamed in the fresh sunlight. As it came closer, I could see its eyes were a deep black as well. I quickly dropped my gaze, not wanting it to think I was challenging it by meeting its eyes.

I held my breath as the wolf came so close I could hear it breathing. Behind me, Max’s chanting became quiet. As if he didn’t want to startle the wolf.

The wolf surprised me by licking my exposed neck briefly. I inhaled sharply and closed my eyes, expecting to feel a bite. But none came. I looked up at the wolf and found it looking down at me, gentleness in its eyes.

I swallowed hard and lowered my head again, tilting it to the side to bare my neck.

Again, the wolf licked me briefly before stopping. Since I was somewhat expecting it, the lick didn’t startle me. Instead, it sent a shiver down my spine.

“Indigo,” Max whispered.

“Don’t stop,” I said through clenched teeth without moving.

“It’s done.”

I turned and saw Max held the silver dagger. Except it was no longer silver. It glowed like the sun. He sheathed it and then looked at me and the wolf, swallowing hard.

“No sudden movements,” I whispered to him.

He nodded and didn’t move.

I looked up at the wolf again. It had a different expression on its face from before. Its eyes were scrunched up slightly as if it were… smiling?

“That doesn’t look like a werewolf,” Max whispered fearfully, “It’s not a full moon.”

“Shut. Up.” I told him through my teeth, keeping my eyes on the wolf.

The wolf gave a small huff and then nudged my shoulder with its nose.

“What does it want?” Max asked.

I groaned in frustration. “To eat me,” I snapped at him over my shoulder, “Now shut up.”

A deep sound startled me. I looked at the wolf again to see its body shaking somewhat. The sound was a laugh. It was laughing.

“Should I get my dagger? My normal one, I mean.”

The wolf’s eyes suddenly snapped onto Max, the laughter ceasing. Slowly, the wolf shook its head.

My eyes widened.

“What the fuck?” Max gasped. “It can understand us?”

The wolf nodded.

“What’d your books say about shapeshifters, Indigo?” Max asked urgently.

“Now you believe me,” I grumbled.

“There’s one right in front of us! It’s not a werewolf so it has to be a shapeshifter! How do we kill it?”

A low growl rumbled in the wolf’s throat.

“Oh, right… it can understand us,” Max said shakily.

At the sound of the growl, I dropped my head again, tilting to the side to show my neck.

Another sound came from the wolf. It sounded content as he licked my neck. Unlike the brief licks from before, it was sustained and repeated. I shuddered as I felt tingles go down my spine.

“Stay away from them, foul beast!” I heard Max pull out his dagger.

The wolf growled at him, but took a step back.

I whimpered in disappointment before catching myself and giving myself a shake.

“Put that away,” I ordered Max, “If he wanted to kill us, we’d be dead.”

“It’s a monster! It’s trying to eat you!”

“Your boyfriend’s a werewolf, dude. Maybe we shouldn’t judge these things right away.”

“Werewolves are different! They’re turned against their will and they’re only dangerous during the full moon!”

“We don’t know what he is,” I argued, “He doesn’t seem very dangerous.”

“Uh, have you seen him? He’s like seven feet tall!”

“I don’t mean he can’t be dangerous, I mean he isn’t trying to kill us despite the fact that you’re brandishing a knife. Put that away!”

Max grumbled to himself and tightened his grip on the dagger. I faced the wolf again. He had sat down on his haunches while Max and I argued and seemed to be listening intently.

“Sorry about him,” I said to the wolf gently.

The wolf inclined his head.

“Maybe it wants to lure us back to its litter of man eating puppies!” Max suggested.

The wolf heaved a heavy sigh and shook his head.

“I don’t think he has puppies,” I told Max.

“How do you know it’s a he?”

I looked at the wolf and tilted my head to the side, “I guess I don’t. Are you a he?”

The wolf nodded.

“Well, then. There we go. I’m a they named Indigo and that’s a he named Max. Do you plan to kill us?”

The wolf shook his head.

“Great. Then I’m gonna get off my knees, if that’s okay.”

The wolf gave a chuckle and nodded. I rose to my feet.

“Okay, so if it’s—”

“He,” I corrected Max.

“Fine, he. If he’s like… intelligent, why’d he bite your neck like that?”

My cheeks heated up and I mumbled, “He didn’t bite me.”

“Maybe he was turning you!” Max accused, “Making you an evil shapeshifter like him.”

The wolf sighed and shook his head.

“He says no,” I told Max.

“Well clearly he has some ill intent! And we can’t believe anything he says! You know how vampires lie about everything.”

“He doesn’t look like a vampire.”

“What’d you read about shapeshifters?” Max demanded, “What do they do?”

“The books weren’t accurate about werewolves, like you pointed out last night. I doubt everything about shapeshifters is accurate either.”

“Indigo. What was it?” Max asked, suspicious.

“They… The book said they steal people away to… breed them,” I mumbled, “To make more shapeshifters.”

“See! Puppies! I told you!”

My face burned.

The wolf shook his head.

“I’m not asking you,” Max said to the wolf, pointing his dagger in the wolf’s direction, “I don’t trust you.”

The wolf sighed and inclined his head.

“Clearly it just wants to drag you to its den to have its way with you!” Max said.

I turned away from both of them to hide my flushed face.

“It wasn’t like omegaverse stuff, right?” Max asked, his voice suddenly nervous, “Like… it wouldn’t want me for that? Mpreg’s only a fanfiction thing, right?”

My face had to be beet red. I was certain.

“You promised to never bring up the omegaverse,” I mumbled.

The wolf gave a chortle and got to his feet. Max stumbled back a step, holding his knife aloft. But the wolf turned and left. Abruptly, he just disappeared into the trees.

“What the fuck?” Max asked.

“I don’t know, but we should pack up,” I said, hoping I hid my disappointment well.

Max stood guard while I cleaned up the spell’s supplies.

“You have the vampire weapon?” I asked.

He patted the dagger sheathed on his belt.

“Good.”

With everything gathered, we headed back to camp. Max still held his normal dagger at the ready. I had my retractable staff in hand, but it wasn’t extended and I wasn’t ready to use it. I genuinely didn’t think the wolf meant us harm.

I hoped I wasn’t biased because I was attracted to it. Something about how it felt when it licked me… I wanted more. I tried to fight down those feelings. Besides, he was gone. We wouldn’t see him again.

Except when the camp came into view, he was there. Between our tents, he laid on his belly, head upright, watching us approach.

Max jumped in front of me when he saw, dagger ready.

“Put that away before you hurt someone,” I told him, stepping around him and fighting back a smile of joy, “Hello again.”

The wolf inclined his head.

“Stop,” Max told me, frustrated, “Seriously, Indigo. It’s a shapeshifter. It’s just trying to drag you to its den to breed you.”

I bit my tongue, attempting to fight the flush I felt in my cheeks.

Being bred by the wolf didn’t sound so bad. If its tongue felt good on my neck, I could only imagine how… No! No don’t imagine. Stop that.

I shook myself before saying, “It hasn’t dragged me anywhere yet.”

“Because I’m here to protect you! It knows it won’t win a fight without at least losing an eye or—oof!”

Suddenly, the wolf tackled Max, knocking him to the ground and sending the dagger flying. The wolf caught it midair in his mouth and turned to look down at Max, prone on his back.

The wolf dropped the dagger beside Max and backed away.

Max didn’t move for several long moments, looking stunned.

“Are you okay?” I asked him, aghast.

“Am I dead?” he whispered.

The wolf chuckled slightly and I said, “No, you look pretty alive.”

“My life flashed before my eyes.”

“Lots of comic books?”

“Lots of comic books,” he agreed, still staring straight up, his eyes wide.

“He didn’t kill you,” I offered tentatively, “Just… showed you that you don’t really stand a chance against him.”

“Uh-huh,” Max said, blinking a few times. He sat up and picked up his knife. He looked at the wolf for several moments before sheathing his dagger.

The wolf gave an approving nod.

“If he wanted us dead, we’d be dead,” I said as Max got up, “If he wanted to… drag me away… I’d be dragged away by now.”

“Okay, so the books were wrong,” Max mumbled.

“I mean, maybe there’re other shapeshifters that do that,” I shrugged, “Uh… are you a shapeshifter? Do you have a human form?”

The wolf nodded.

“Can you change now so I stand a chance against you?” Max muttered.

The wolf chuckled and nodded.

“Really?” I asked nervously.

The wolf nodded again.

“D-do you need clothes?” I asked, “Something to… cover up with?”

He nodded and moved towards my tent. He put his head inside and then emerged with my blanket in his mouth. He looked at me questioningly.

“Sure,” I agreed, my voice a little high. Something about him choosing my blanket made me feel a way.

The wolf dropped the blanket to his feet and then started to vibrate. His whole body moved and shifted. Eventually he became a human man, kneeling. He grabbed the blanket and wrapped it around his waist before standing.

He cleared his throat and said “My name is Vikram.”

Max’s eyes were wide as he took in the man’s appearance. I avoided looking at him, feeling my body warm.

“I’m sex—Max! My name’s Max,” Max exclaimed, “My name is Max.”

Vikram smiled kindly and inclined his head, “Yes, you told me your name earlier.” Then he faced me, “And you are Indigo.”

I nodded without looking at him directly. He was a good looking man, as Max clearly noticed.

“I apologize for disturbing your ritual,” Vikram told us, “It appears that it worked regardless.”

“It did,” Max said, puffing out his chest proudly, resting his hand on the new dagger.

“Is that something do you often?” Vikram asked.

“Yeah, I’m learning to do spells,” Max ran his fingers through his hair, making it stand up, “I’m pretty good at it.”

“Yes, it appears you are. That is a weapon against vampires?”

“Harnessed sunlight,” Max confirmed, “I’ve been working for months to memorize the spell.”

“You did well,” Vikram said, smiling warmly.

A giggle escaped Max’s lips before he caught himself, covering it up by coughing.

“Do you often fight vampires?” Vikram asked of me.

“Sometimes,” I squeaked.

“That is no easy task. Perhaps I can offer assistance?”

“Yes, please,” Max breathed before shaking himself, “I mean… Hold on. What are you?”

“A werewolf,” he stated.

“Clearly not,” Max scoffed, “It’s not a full moon.”

“I have learned to control my shifts outside the full moon. I still experience the full moon shift, but outside of that, I have control of myself.”

“So you don’t want to drag us to a den to breed us?” Max asked, sounding a little dazed.

“Shut. Up.” I growled at him.

“Werewolves are infertile,” Vikram stated, an amused smile on his lips.

“That’s not a no,” Max mumbled.

“Okay, we need to head back home,” I said quickly, “If we don’t get some head… I mean… start heading… uh… It’s a long drive.”

“May I ask where you call home?”

“We work out of a bookstore called Peters’ Books,” Max answered, “Hey, you should come visit! Mr. Peters would love to hear about how you change at will!”

“Maybe your boyfriend could learn how to do that,” I said pointedly to Max.

It was Max’s turn to flush.

“You shouldn’t out people like that,” Max said through clenched teeth.

“Indigo mentioned you had a werewolf boyfriend earlier, while I was shifted,” Vikram noted, “Though I do agree one should never be outed against their will, rest assured it is not an issue here. I am bisexual.”

“Really?” Max’s eyes widened excitedly, “My boyfriend and I are on a break.”

“How old are you?” Vikram asked.

“Twenty.”

“It is nothing personal, but you are younger than I feel comfortable with pursuing a relationship. I am flattered, however.”

“I can’t be that much younger than you,” Max frowned.

“I assure you, there is an uncomfortably large age gap. I would never dictate what other people can do, but I am not comfortable engaging with anyone under twenty-five.”

“See?” I demanded of Max, “I’m not the only one uncomfortable with that!”

“Fine, you finally found another weirdo like you,” Max mumbled, “Get a room already.”

My cheeks heated up again.

“Okay, we should head out,” I said quickly.

“Indeed,” Vikram agreed, “May I keep this?” He indicated the blanket around his waist.

My face was definitely red.

“Sure…”

“Thank you, Indigo. If it is alright, I do intend to stop by this book store. Perhaps I can assist in your fight against vampires.”

[madswritingvoid]

Say You’re Sorry

Pairing: Max Phillips x f!reader

Words: 3k (oops haha)

Warnings: SMUT. 18+ only. Oral (f receiving), unprotected sex, p in v sex, fingering, swearing, slight choking, first time writing smut should probably be a warning itself, sexism, Max Phillips is a warning probably.

You knew it was a bad idea. Well, actually, no you didn’t. Not fully. The voice in your head was just screaming at you to stop - there were other ways to get his attention. Other ways to make Max feel bad for what he did during the Synersavers presentation that didn’t require you stooping this low. Fuck it, you figured, if he can go around and do whatever he wants to get his way then so can I.

Fixing your hair and outfit in the mirror one last time, you went back into the office looking for the desk you usually avoid like the plague. Max Phillips, fuck you.

Earlier That Day

“So you see, Mr. Jacobson, our third quarter projections have us coming in on top by two million dollars and the fourth quarter is looking even better. I mean really champ, if these numbers were anymore amazing they’d be as hot as your associate there in that fetching skirt,” Max winks at the woman taking meeting minutes for your potential new client, causing her skin to blotch, “fucking unreal. Pardon my French,” he finishes, earning a big laugh from the CEO of Synersavers, the new bullshit placebo pill that was supposed to alter the brain’s natural neural pathways to promote synergy. You weren’t sure what dreams synergy was helping pathetic humans to achieve, but it meant a bonus if they signed on so you made sure that PowerPoint presentation was the best slides of your career.

You scoff, worried that if you roll your eyes they’ll get stuck. You know Max Phillips was quite the charmer, you knew better than anyone in the office. This past year saw him go from being just your hot vampire boss you had a crush on, to your hot vampire boss that was now your boyfriend. 

While you never made an official statement to your coworkers, you quietly signed the papers Amanda in HR needed signed and let the sound of you screaming Max’s name in his office while he was balls deep inside you let the rest of your coworkers know of your relationship. Overall, Max was a great boyfriend. Better than expected even - attentive, caring, protective to a fault, all while still being that loveable (?) piece of shit frat boy extraordinaire he had been at the beginning. 

You knew he still had to lay on the charm to close sales from time to time, never actually violating your relationship in any way, but after the fight you had this morning you didn’t think flirting with the only person in the meeting who did not actually control whether or not this partnership was going to happen right in front of you was the best move.

“Mr. Phillips,” Jacobson says, once again only acknowledging Max and completely ignoring you as he had been for the entire presentation, “you got quite the silver tongue. But I like that about ya, I think you get what our product is all about and I wanna make this partnership work. I’m surprised your presentation is as good as it was, because if you’ll pardon my French, if my secretary looked as delicious as yours does I’d be too busy fucking her left, right, and centre to even think about the fourth quarter anything!” He laughs and claps Max on the shoulder and you tense up, sure that Max is going to say something. Not even because he’s your boyfriend, but because he landed the sale and doesn’t have to be as sleazy as this dickhead is. 

“See that’s where you’re wrong Jacobson, it’s almost like I’m working double to avoid her. Just doesn’t get the mojo flowing, y’know? Maybe we should switch, what do you think sweetheart?” He looks over at the still flustered secretary, “Come on and work for me and we’ll work on some new ways of making synergy happen,” he wags his eyebrows and you’re surprised this poor woman hasn’t slid right off her seat. You’re stunned. Even as Mr. Jacobson laughs and brings a laughing Max into some sort of capitalist bro hug, you can’t bring yourself to move. It isn’t until you hear the squeak of the wheels from the chair Mr. Jacobson’s secretary was sitting against the shitty meeting room carpet that you snap back to the present and shut everything down. By the time you finish everyone is long gone, leaving you to stew in your rage.

A hesitant knock on the meeting room door makes you jump as you’re met with a sheepish looking Evan in the doorway. You were never a big fan of Evan when you started, kind of thought he was a wimp but he was nice enough. After getting with Max and learning their shared history, you couldn’t stand Evan, but were able to be far more professional when needed until Max.

“Oh, sorry, I didn’t realize anyone was still in here after Max and the Synersavers people left,” he shrugged. “What the fuck do you mean Max left with them?” You asked through clenched teeth. Scratching the back of his neck nervously, Evan took a deep breath before telling you, “yeah, um. They left for a late liquid lunch from what it sounded like, Max said you would be too busy learning how to make a paper clip bracelet to join them… Sorry, he’s such an asshole. You don’t deserve that, especially not from that bastard,” He couldn’t meet your eyes. Even though he still tried to tell you to leave Max every single day, you appreciate him being there this time.

There were many things you could be mean to Evan for, but deep down you knew he didn’t deserve the wrath of your anger this time. 

Later That Afternoon

After taking the elevator up to the office to mentally cleanse his mind from that mindless lunch with that absolute creep Jacobson, Max was trying to come up with the best apology for you. He knew he didn’t have to be so forward flirting with that secretary, what the fuck was her name anyways, in order to win the sexist CEO over. But he was feeling petty after your fight while you were getting ready for work he figured it wouldn’t hurt to remind you that many other women find him quite the catch.

“You’re lying! You have to be lying!! There’s no way that happened oh my god,” Max stops dead in his tracks as he hears your giggles from inside the office. “It is! I totally saw Tim practising the dance moves the day after that Kelly Clarkson concert in the men’s washroom. I didn’t even know she had dancers, but from what I saw it really must have been a hell of a show,” Evan says as you throw your head back and let out another over-the-top cackle. You’re sitting on top of Evan’s desk, resting your hand on his shoulder as he sits in between your open legs, clearly enjoying the attention. 

You’re hamming it up, he knows that, he knows that’s not what your real laugh sounds like - the laugh he gets to hear when he really does something that you like. He knows you don’t mean it but he’s immediately flooded with anger and guilt. He obviously didn’t realize how much the day had taken a toll on you and now you must be really mad if you’re going to Evan to get back at him.

“Oh my god Evan that’s too funny,” you giggle and place a hand on his shoulder, “you just made my day! I won’t tell Tim anything, it’ll be our little secret,” you wink. Evan’s blush deepens at the touch, maybe you weren’t so bad after all and if Max (and Amanda at this point) didn’t look out he would maybe ask you out for a drink sometime soon. Bring you back to the land of the living.

Deciding he’s absolutely had enough, Max quietly comes up behind Evan and slaps both hands on his shoulders after seeing you move yours back to your lap, causing him to freeze and let out a little squeak. “Slugger, I’m sure whatever’s going on here is just too funny, but didn’t I ask you to finish up that presentation for tomorrow’s meeting with NuevaWeight?” he pouts, “I really thought you were taking this job seriously buddy, but maybe I should just get Andrew to take over…”

“N-no Max, sorry. Yeah the presentation is almost done, it’ll be ready before the end of the day,” Evan stammers. Max finally meets your eyes and smirks, “and you can meet me in my office. Apparently you think you can stop doing your job and distracting my employees.”

You can’t even speak, your jaw set and eyes burning from the absolute rage you feel right now. Yeah you’ll meet him in his office, but it won’t be so he can lecture you about whatever bullshit he’s already thought of. “Of course Mr. Phillips, meet you there,” you manage to snap back, calmly making your way to his office. Anyone walking by you immediately gets out of your way, your anger coming off in waves making your undead coworkers shiver.

Clapping Evan on the shoulder one more time, Max saunters over to his office, ready to make you beg for his forgiveness after that little stunt. As soon as he opens his office door he realizes that won’t be happening.

You’re sitting in his chair, legs propped up on his desk in a way that makes your skirt ride up and expose more thigh than what HR might deem office appropriate. “Ah, Mr. Phillips, so nice of you to make it,” you smirk. “Sweets, I think there must be some sort of misunderstandi-'' you cut him off with a dark look and stand up. Walking up to him you close his office door and push him against it, “No champ,” you sneer, “I think you’re confused here. I’m not the one who decided to be a very, very bad boy by flirting with someone else and insulting me in front of new clients.” Chest to chest, your hand slithers up to grab Max’s throat. Even though he is a vampire who could toss you around like a ragdoll, you know he’s letting you be in control. He likes it.

“While you were out entertaining I’ve been thinking about what I could do to make you really sorry, baby. You were already on thin ice from this morning, but now you’re drowning,” you squeeze a little harder on his throat making his eyes roll back. “What are you gonna do? I’m so sorry,” he whispers. You take a moment, just looking into those eyes you love so much, before answering.

“Maybe I’ll sit on your cock. Let you fill my pussy up but not let you cum, because only good boys get to come, you know that Maxie. Maybe I’ll just use you like my own walking, talking dildo. If I’m so replaceable you won’t mind not getting to fill me up? Right?” You smirk again as he whines, his hands clenching because all he wants to do is make you feel good now. 

“You wanna run that mouth, Phillips? You wanna make everything think you’re so fucking special when I know you’re really just a scared little vamp, huh?” You say with a pout. Grabbing his hair, you force his head up so you can look right into his eyes that are now almost completely black from lust. “Come on big shot, if you wanna be a big boy then you gotta show me that mouth can do something other than just spew bullshit, slugger.” 

That’s all the permission he needs. He hoists you up in his arms and thanks to vampire speed you’re now sat on his leather couch, skirt up around your waist, underwear ripped clean off, fully exposed to his hungry eyes. “Baby, I’m so sorry,” he pouts, “let me make you feel good. I just want you-” You’ve heard enough, pushing him down so his mouth finally reaches your core. Moaning at finally tasting you, Max wastes no time taking your clit and sucking hard, already teasing your entrance with one of his long fingers. 

“Y-Yes Max, fuck! Be a good boy and make me cum just like this,” you moan and clench around the finger inside of you, knowing you’re absolutely dripping onto the couch underneath you. He adds a second, then a third, making you arch your back until you’re almost sitting up from how good he’s fucking you with his hands. His mouth doesn’t stop, sucking and licking, spelling out his apologies against your body. Knowing you’re close, he starts focusing on that spot inside of you that drives you wild. 

“Oh! Oh, Maxie yes. Such a g-good boy,” you pant, meeting his hand thrust for thrust trying to reach your high, “make me feel so good please please please baby I’m right there, I-” you can’t finish that sentence as your vision goes white and all you can do is let out a strangled moan that sounds like his name.

Once your legs start shaking you pull both of you up, undoing his belt and pushing him onto the couch so you can straddle his waist. You wrap a hand around his neck and start nipping at the area, rocking your soaked pussy along his aching cock that was now free from the confines of his dress pants a few times before sinking down on him. A wicked grin stretches across your face as his moans get louder. He chokes when he feels you gush around him, not expecting you to come again so soon but you were still sensitive from his mouth, the hair above his cock rubbing deliciously against your clit, but you wanted more still. 

Picking up the pace, you squeeze around his throat again and start taunting him, “You gonna replace me baby? Yeah? You gonna find a pussy that takes you this good? Be my guest. Go right now and find something better, or show me how goddamn sorry you are.”

Granting him permission to take over, Max flips you on your back, making sure your head is supported by one of the couch cushions. He immediately wraps your legs around his waist, angling one leg to let him sink even deep inside of you, your moans mixing together as you both revel in the feeling of him finally being inside of you. Wanting to prove himself he wastes no time pulling out just to start slamming back into you. 

You moan and clench around him, making him hiss and he doesn’t let up. Watching him disappear inside of you over and over again, he starts babbling his apologies. “N-Never baby. Could never replace you. Never gonna find a pu-pussy this fucking good. Look at you, so perfect, so so perfect taking my cock like that. I’m sorry. You’re so good. I don’t deserve it, it’s- fuck it’s so fucking good. Best pussy of all time,” he moans as you clamp down on him, your third orgasm ripping through you. 

“Yes - yes Max, that’s fucking r-right. I’m the best pussy you’ll ever have,” you moan again from being so full. You know he’s sorry so you decide to let him finish after all. Taking your hands off his shoulders, you start tangling your fingers in his hair and bring his face close to your so your lips are almost touching, “you did so good Maxie,” you coo, “you cock made me feel so fucking good I know you’re sorry now.” He shudders at your words but keeps his steady pace, trying to make you cum again, still holding back his own impending orgasm. “Thank you baby, ‘m so so sorry, I love you and I just wanna be good for you-” “shhh shhh Maxie, I know I know. You did good baby, now show me how good you are and cum inside of me.” 

That’s all he needs. 

Something between a groan and growl comes deep from within Max as he finally lets go, pushing himself as far as he can inside of you as he starts painting your walls. Coming down from his high, he nuzzles his face into the crook of your neck as you start peppering him with kisses wherever you can reach, carding your fingers through his hair.

“I’m really sorry baby,” you hear him mumble into your neck, “I love you.” He kisses along your throat and you hum, moving your head to give him more access. “I know Max, I love you too. I forgive you. But try that again and I’ll cut your dick off in front of the whole office,” you laugh.

He chuckles too, continuing to shower you with love. “As much as I want to stay right here forever baby, let’s go home and I can keep showing you how sorry I am,” he suggests, wiggling his eyebrows to earn a giggle from you, “sounds good Maxie, you’re lucky I’m just sooooo forgiving.”

Untangling from each other and making yourselves as presentable as you care to be, you leave the office hand-in-hand, ready to see what the rest of the night has in store.

[maskeraith]

big eldar scrolls on line post about what i thought about it

may have some spoilers for the morrowind storyline and sidequests idk also I am inevitably gonna compare it to ffxiv a lot as it’s the only other mmorpg I’ve played good luck

Writing this after finishing writing the rest wow this got too long there is a tldr though haha

so the first thing I will say is that eso’s overworld exploration and sidequesting blows ffxiv away completely, there is so much to do and fun to be had in eso simply by exploring around! the enemies feel cool to fight, there are delves and solo dungeons to just stumble across with quests in there, skill points just lying around if you look hard enough, gathering spots that you can just gather from without having to be a specific profession or something, WORLD bosses that you need a group to battle just OUT there it’s really cool! Ffxiv does have some really beautiful environments but in terms of actual stuff to do, there’s literally just fates and they’re pretty shit to be honest, and i guess the sightseeing log??

and sidequests! all my time in the game was spent in the morrowind area (vvardenfall I think? my eso lore is zero watch out) and every sidequest I did had a really engaging storyline. They do mostly amount to fetch quests and slay monster quests in terms of gameplay with some puzzle moments sometimes, but the storylines were captivating enough to justify most of what you had to do. compared to ffxiv which is BLOATED with boring fetch quests with uninteresting storylines eso has it figured out. the characters you meet and their dialogue is great and sometimes you can even make choices which affect the final outcome of the quest which is always fun (your character having the personality of a brick aside). I actually think I enjoyed certain sidequests more than the main story of morrowind they’re that involved

Also there are world events but I didn’t really get into them, there was like a huge tornado which spawned some enemies that give you massive exp, but my horsey was too slow and I only got there at the tail end because they’re great for farming so every player in the world goes there and kills them instantly they seem cool though

in terms of lore, I’m not someone who is super interested in the lore of the elder scrolls universe but I found myself learning a whole lot of very crazy stuff from the friends I was playing with who DO know all about it, and I will say that if the lore of the elder scrolls universe interests you in any way you’ll love this game! so I learned that there are Eras in this universe, and eso takes place in the second era I believe. The other main series games all take place in the third or fourth I think, so eso is able to like set the groundwork for those games and explain the history behind stuff going on in all the main games, which I think is a really good idea, perfect for fans of the lore and stuff. Like I remember the funny talking dog from skyrim and he’s like the primary antagonist of the morrowind main story like woah

The combat is where I think the game started to fall off for me, again with the ffxiv comparison but it just wasn’t reaching levels nearly as interesting as the combat in that game for me.

Firstly, there’s no tab targetting (unless there’s a setting in the menu somewhere i missed?) you actually aim all your attacks, single target, aoe, whatever. for me this made it harder to be able to gain a situational awareness, and I have to keep my camera aimed at the boss and I’m not able to move it around to see if there was anything else going on. I do see how aiming your attacks could actually make the game more appealing to some people, though, as it does give a sense that you are more actively participating in the battle and not just standing there pressing buttons, but for me this sort of thing doesn’t make any difference

The second thing was the amount of abilities you have at any one time - you have 10 abilities and 2 ultimates slotted at any one time. Five and one ult are active at a time, and you have to swap weapons (it’s as easy as the press of a button) to switch to your second bar with the other 5 and 1 ult. This does make the game a lot more accessible I think, but it also means the stuff you get to do is just gonna be a lot more straightforward and spammy compared to the interesting and involved rotations you get in ffxiv. as a tank, I set myself up to put three dots and a debuff on the enemy and then spam my one damaging attack, until I had to reapply the stuff again, and that was basically it. I had some tank cooldowns too like a shield, heal, a grab and so on. I did look up the Most Complicated Rotation to see how hard it could get, which seemed to be stamina nightblade, and even that has “Ability x11″ or something in its rotation

Simple rotations would be fine for me if the bosses themselves were more difficult or complicated to compensate, but honestly nothing was any more difficult or involved than ffxiv. On youtube I’ve watched like 5 dungeons and a trial on the hardest Veteran difficulty, and the dungeons don’t look like anything more than what you would get in other mmos. The trials looks like really great content honestly, but there’s no party finder for them as far as I know so you have to manually gather 11 other people which is never something I enjoy trying to do in multiplayer games lol

i also didn’t super appreciate that the game wanted to like hide a bunch of info from me by default? like a few hours in I complained that it was impossible to know when my dots and self buffs ran out because all I had was like little particle effects on the enemy/myself to go off, and my friends were like “oh yeah you need to turn on these tooltips in the options” like huh?? I need to know this stuff come on

There is some really cool stuff in the combat though! Every player has like a basic bash attack, which can interrupt certain attacks, and then a basic heavy attack, which can knock down staggered enemies (they get staggered if you interrupt them) so there is more to do than just your abilities.

One thing I will mention though, is that I think a huge part of the combat is resource management - you spend stamina/mana on your abilities and if you’re not careful it’s easy to run out. As a tank, blocking takes up stamina, and sometimes I would not manage it correctly and run out and be unable to use my anything for a bit. You get it back by doing heavy attacks (contrary to every game ever) and other like passives unique to whatever build you might have going on. A lot of the game’s difficulty in harder content might come from this, but I didn’t get that deep into any of that sort of thing

I think the way you pick your abilities is really cool - you level up a whole bunch of different skill trees at a time, and you can slot any ability from any tree at any time (other than weapon skills specifically, you must be weilding that weapon) into your 10 slots. Your class has three unique trees, then there’s like a tree for every weapon type, for mage and fighter’s guild, this weird guild called the undaunted, werewolf and vampire, probably more I forgot about. All of them have 5 skills that you unlock as you level that tree, and all of those skills can be morphed into one of two “strong” versions of that skill once you level that specific skill. So there is a huge amount of player choice in how you build your character! I remember getting loads of advice from my friends but also just thinking to myself “but this skill though...” (i am so sorry). There are loads of passives too but they’re kind of lame and you just sort of put your excess skill points in them to make yourself passively stronger. I am sure there are Optimal builds, but playing casually you can literally just do anything

I do think levelling them can sometimes be a pain though because like, if you want the fifth ability in Skill Tree 1 but you don’t really use any of the first four, well actually you do have to start using a bunch of those skills you don’t want because you gain more exp for that skill tree the more of its skills you use, sort of a minor thing I guess

Finally I will talk about how I really do not like the execution of the loot system... So you get armour sets in this game and if you wear 5 of them you get a very significant passive, like whenever you crit you summon a big ghoul to shoot acid, or all of your aoe abilities also taunt. I think this is a super cool idea in theory, and it allows for even further personal customisation of the kind of character you want to play. However..

So the max level is 50, but the real max level is like 180 or something because at 50, you continue to level up but each level just gives you a point to put into these big huge bonus passive skill trees which continue to increase your stats up to the 180th point or something like that. In eso, though, you can go anywhere and do anything and all the enemies are scaled to you. But, it’s actually that you are scaled to the enemies - while below level 50, you get an invisible buff that makes you as strong as a level 50 character. This means that every level you gain, you actually get slightly weaker, if you’re not updating your armour.

Armour drops at whatever level you are, up to the cap of 180 where you are the strongest you can be. So ultimately what this means is every piece of armour you get up until you reach the level cap will quickly become obsolete. Every time I collected 5 pieces of a set and got a cool passive, all I could think was “this will be fun for about 4 levels” because I knew I’d need to swap it all out for stronger stuff. Essentially I felt locked out of seriously farming for the gear sets I wanted until I reached Max Max level, which made everything I collected seem pretty pointless to me.

Also, always being as strong as a level 50 character did kind of make it feel like I wasn’t really levelling up at all? It’s why I broke my rule of “I will get to level 50 before stopping” because I actually was level 50 all along, I got all the abilities from my skill trees that I wanted and ran a bunch of dungeons with them and I was in the 30s, but there were no other skills I could really see myself swapping out so I was essentially “max level”, as far as I was concerned.

so yeah tl;dr these are my two main opinions:

This game is an awesome time running around and exploring the environment, doing quests and running dungeons! If you’re a fan of the elder scrolls world and lore it is absolutely a must play!

Customising your character’s skills and armour sets is a lot of fun, but I do think it comes at the expense of not having a really finely tuned, coherant combat style, it feels a lot like I’m Just Hitting All The Buttons.

The end lol

[magiquemalec]

3x21+3x22 reaction I guess

and so it begins..rip me in advance I guess you're a snowflake, jonathan, congrats THIS IS THE HUNT (oh god this is the last time aonkg don't make me cry I'm getting emotional)

Alec has a wedding to plan he doesn't have time for angst THE RING :(( alec bby take care of yourself, eat something pls (and then get your man back) YES YOU DO PLAN THAT WEDDING magnus on that throne fuck the way he's looking at his ring DOUBLE FUCK "your word" his face lkansgmsgd god I love him OOF YES MAGNUS GET THE HELL OUT OF MY HOUSE oh right jordan deaded F I guess am I suppossed to be sad about this? is this how they're sending her off then? aw man :/ good for her though he's going to be a shadowhunter again? I mean, it was kinda in the trailer but still? Maia sendoff - check Sizzy - check Izzy???? WHAT THE FUCK SHE'S ON FIRE (my brain: THIS GIRL IS ON FIIIIIIIREEEEE) klsdmg I've already seen this like 10 times but it's still funny "Something happened" yeah y'know she just randomly caught on fire no biggie rip Sizzy that didn't last long LMAO ALEC Izzy stop lying ALEC WHAT THE FUCK I mean I get it he just wants to get to Magnus but they better not turn him into a vampire jonathan's going through it alliance rune time woop lbr Alec's on board with pretty much anything at this point boy was ready to get turned into a vampire for Magnus ew ok lady beauty truly is in the eye of the beholder I suppose oh we don't even get to see him turn back I think I liked him better as a lizard alec has no chill today don't test him Lorenzo LMAO are you sure about that Clary? are you reaaaaally sure zoom zoom WHAT THE FUCK THEY PAIRED ALEC WITH LORENZO WHAT THE FUCK THEY BETTER FIX THIS LATER ON (alec with magic is dope though) oh great now they're all separated just shut up lorenzo pls uhhhhhh Alec? oh shit HE USED THE RING TO CALM HIMSELF DOWN I'M EMO wow, that's great, yeah that's awesome lorenzo jfc he's unbelievable I love it HAHA HE CAN'T LIE OMG I DIDN'T EVEN THINK ABOUT THAT is this foreshadowing it's foreshadowing isn't it oof yikes she's so pretty sorry his hair is white now that means he's super evil (is it white or just blond? I can't tell with the lighting and coloring) Meliorn skjdnbggk   what happens to a demon when it dies in edom IZZY freeform? favorite network? what drugs are these people on I don't know how I feel about this fuck off Scott (is that his name? I don't remember) AJABSFJADGJK MALEC I'M CRYING HE'S WILLING TO STAY IN EDOM I BISCUIT izzy's like what the fuck is going on with you you're being too nice is Izzy going to die? it feels like it's headed that way no meliorn :((( he better not die also what kind of plan was that ohh that was kinda cool how the fuck does Alec's bow work it just randomly morphs into the 5 arrow bow when needed they can do that? idk if any of this makes sense but you know what I don't even care oh boy well that's one way to fix that problem I guess OH SHIT RIGHT INTO 3x22 ok

bit of a weird transition but WE HAVE MALEC SO WHO GIVES A SHIT OIAKNKGLSGNKDKGSNKDSOGLNN THAT'S THE SOFTEST FUCKING THING I'VE EVER SEEN FUCK OFF YOU ARE CORDIALLY INVITED  JNKSDG JKSDKGK IT'S HAPPENING ALEC AJHBSGJ ALEC TRULY IS THE ONE ?????? what is this seelie queen/jonathan madness what show am I watching well, rip he's so happy I'm emo 3b Jace is the best Jace I actually kinda like him now wow where was he all this time Clary's so nervous aw this is sweet are THEY FINALLY GONNA TELL US UNDERHILL'S FIRST NAME I NEED TO KNOW still don't know how I feel about sh!luke, but he seems happy so good for him I guess oh good she's hallucinating that's great wat is it really tho? told ya she's going to make an immortality rune I'm calling it O H M Y G O D lorenzo and his fucking paintings sjkbgdkk is this...character growth I'm seeing? incredible magnus got her a dress that's so sweet robert who ksgk sorry but the actor for max has aged like three years when in the show like 3 months have passed like..this timeline man ok but why? I'm so confused oh ok he's just on a killing spree jonathan's finally gonna be a real threat, for all of like..10 minutes I feel like they constantly change how portals work but there's only like 45 minutes left so w/e I guess will the power of love save the day? probably not oh damn why does she have wings what the fuck is going on well that was easy MORE TIME FOR THE MALEC WEDDING I GUESS I mean you knew that was going to happen Clary so...does that mean no immortality rune? I can't even write anything I'm too busy sobbing fucl MY STREAM SKIPPED AJKBDJKBJKGLÖJBKD my stream skipped and I missed part of their vows but that was still the most beautiful thing I have ever seen oh god they're so- perfect I'm crying does no one notice that her angelic rune is gone? Clary :( fuck me that was emotional heline! ANDREW HIS NAME HIS ANDREW WE FINALLY KNOW everyone already knew lmao I mean to be fair they really weren't subtle this music choice is...odd- scratch that, it's bad. I'm sorry, but- yeah no, it's bad. ??? clary ??? I'm sorry but this song choice is actually horrible oh shit she's losing the sight damn they really did that it's almost over I don't know how to feel I've been through so many emotions over the last two hours I'm not ready for it to end oohhh time skip ok WHAT THE WHAT EXCUSE ME INQUISITOR???? WHATR THEY MOVED TO ALICANTE?? JKSNDG HE JUST THREW THAT SHIT I LOVE MAGNUS BANE TO US AND THE DRINKS I LOVE PARALLELS was Taki's a book thing? aaaand my stream broke...that's cool...................................... that's it it's over I don't know how to feel I think...I'm gonna go cry now ok bye