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goji-pilled · 3 years ago

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Okay @princekirijo you want an essay? Well here it is now, or as I like to call it Felix's "Asumari is great and this fandom has no fucking taste" rambling and infodump. Congrats fellas, thanks to Prince you ALL get an asumari essay. But before that I'll try to give you a rundown of Mari and Asuka.

(I'm also so sorry for putting this long ass post on everyone's dashboard)

(Spoiler warning for Evangelion 3.0+1.0 Thrice Upon a Time!!)

Alright on one hand we have Mari Illustrious Makinami. Her whole deal? She's a walking ray of sunshine, literally lol. Unlike any other character in the Evangelion franchise she doesn't suffer from her trauma, she's quite literally the only healthy and functioning human being, she's just slightly leaning towards "batshit crazy" with the stunts she pulls 🤷‍♂️. Other than that she just loves living, she loves being with people, she keeps moving forward, stays positive and decides to live life to it's fullest even after she experiences loss and multiple apocalyptic events (Second Impact, Third Impact, etc.) and she really just embodies the joy of living. That's all there is to her, or at least all we know.

On the other hand, we have Asuka Langley Shikinami who is... well it's hard to explain what she is to be honest. She's part-German and part-Japanese and part of a line of clones specifically made with the purpose to pilot an Evangelion and later on be used as a sacrifice to trigger another Impact (ITS COMPLICATED I KNOW-) Asuka is, unlike Mari, very much suffering from her trauma. She doesn't have her parents and has a very deep seated belief that she's completely alone, which she says doesn't matter as long as she can pilot the Eva. She also very much wants to fight and kill angels all by herself, and it's seriously messing with her when she can't achieve that.

Now we get to the more interesting parts (hopefully this so far wasn't too confusing, then again it's Eva and even I can't fully wrap my head around it all LMAO)

In the second Rebuild movie (Evangelion 2.0 You can (not) advance) we get introduced to both of them, Mari's introduction scene (in the original English dub) has her pilot an Eva and singing about how she'll take the world on by herself, while in the third movie's (Evangelion 3.0 You can (not) redo) opening scene she's piloting the Eva again but this time it's together with Asuka (in her own Unit 02 though) and during that Mari sings about how wonderful it is not to be alone. It's nothing big yet, but it's a really cute detail me thinks,,, you know what else I love about them? They bicker and they banter and it's genuinely so fun to listen to shskdhsuwj

(For a quick catch up: During the end of 2.0 Shinji (the protagonist) triggers another apocalyptic event, the Near Third Impact, and was only stopped due to Kaworu (the guy in my pfp) stepping in. Also between 1.0/2.0 and 3.0/3.0+1.0 are about 14 years (without Shinji bc he's like comatose) where A LOT happens AND we learn in 3.0 that Eva pilots don't age physically bc of "The curse of the Eva"... honestly Eva is wild lmao)

Okay okay I'll get back to it!

So one thing that happens is that Asuka during 2.0 develops a crush on Shinji (girl why-), unfortunately things take a turn for the worse. Asuka had volunteered to be the testpilot for a new Eva (Unit 03), she seemed happy at the time and it was a really sweet build up with the "I can smile, I didn't know I could still do that."-line. And then? Then it turns out the Ninth Angel had infected Unit 03 (Angels are basically the Kaijus they fight using Evas btw). The thing goes on a loose and Shinji is forced to fight it (With Asuka inside mind you), he refuses and his father uses an autopilot to destroy Unit 03. And boy did it destroy the angel, well it and it crushed Asuka between its jaws (you can actually hear her scream btw haha pain :)).

Asuka survived though, but the whole incident cost her her humanity and she ended up becoming an angel herself/she took the place of the Ninth. But despite that, there's one person who keeps believing in Asuka's humanity, who fiercely believes Asuka is still a human and tells her as much.

Yep, that one person is Mari and she keeps holding onto that belief until the very end when Asuka uses her last resort, which is using the power of an angel (Doing so was a guaranteed death sentence btw). Mari's own words (in the German dub) were, "Princess, you're giving up being human…" AND IT MAKES ME SO EMO GOD FUCK

While I'm at it, Mari and Asuka are a fucking killer combo as a team. They rely on each other for support in combat, listen to the other's orders and advice. Especially in Asuka's case it's kind of a big deal that she so openly relies and counts on Mari's support. Like these two trust each other with their damn lifes!!! Holy shit!!

Guess what though, they also have nicknames for eachother. Mari always calls Asuka "Princess" or "(Your) Highness" while Asuka calles Mari "Four-eyes" / "Four-eyed chrony (idk how you spell that tbh RIP" Even better though, in the German dub Asuka calls Mari "Brillerella" as in a combination of "Brille" (German for glasses) and "Cinderella",,,,Cinderella and her Prince,,,Brillerella and her Princess,,, man, that was a gay fucking move of the translation team. Spoiler: I owe them my life.

Funfact: There's exactly two times throughout the Rebuild movies where Mari uses Asuka's actual name. These two times being when she watches Asuka "die" and be used as a sacrifice for Gendo's selfish plan and when later on she begs Shinji, "So please the Princess… Asuka needs your help!" And the best part? That wasn't even the first time she did that. The mentioned line came from 3.0+1.0, but she did that too in 3.0 with the, "At least save the Princess!" line (although her tone was much more...pissed, like she was really angry lol)

Remember the crush Asuka had on Shinji? Well due to the Unit 03 incident a whole lot of other shit got mixed into that and her feelings for him in general became really bitter (understandably so). Now Mari being who she is sometimes teases Asuka about said old crush but she really does want Asuka to get closure and sort that mess out.

As an example for the teasing, in 3.0 there's a scene that goes like this (please imagine Mari with a literal :3 face while saying that):

"Unit! Are you back in the game?"

"I'm on it, your Highness. But first things first, how was our little puppy (Shinji)? Did he sit like a good little boy?"

"He's exactly the same! Same stupid face talking mayhem!"

"That goofy face of his, that's what you wanted to see? Riiiiight?"

"Shut up! I went there to bat him one!... And I feel better!"

There's also a very short bonus manga that was released in Japan for Thrice Upon a Time's release that has Mari trying to convince Asuka to come with her on the mission to get Shinji, given everything that follows, it's just another thing to prove my point. And the final bit relating to that is this:

"Feeling better now?"

"Yeah, I do feel better."

That's the exchange Asuka and Mari have after they talked to Shinji, it's nothing special but I think it's really sweet and this time Asuka actually sounded like she was feeling better instead of when she was screaming after she nearly broke pretty thick glass with her fist (If she had hit someone with that much force she definitely would've broken something omggg #violentimpulsesgang)

To get back on track though: I already mentioned it but during the second half of 3.0+1.0 Asuka "dies" (and honestly that entire scene is worth its own in-depth post because its just one huge parallel to The End of Evangelion), the point is: You can tell that the loss of Asuka honestly hits Mari hard. Not only because of how Mari screams Asuka's name but also because of her expressions. They're pained, like really fucking pained and Mari even apologizes to her that she has to fall back due to the fact that she's injured AND because eveything is going wrong.

After the events of Evangelion 3.0 these two got seperated from eachother, Mari was with WILLE (the organization both of them are with) and on board of Wunder (the ship WILLE basically operates from) while Asuka was in a Village full of (Near) Third Impact Survivors. When they do meet again it went like this:

Asuka, barely back, comes to the door and calls, "I'm back." And within seconds of Asuka stepping into their room after the door opens Mari already runs towards her, arms wide open and she says, "Welcome back, your Highness! Good job. I missed you so much!" And she says that while she literally nuzzles into Asuka,,,like,,,what the fuck gay people real!!!

Best part? Asuka clearly has enough strength to push Mari completely away if she were uncomfortable, but she doesn't. Asuka merely wanted enough space to look at the room (because Mari managed to horde even more books lol) and play her game. During their entire renunion Mari keeps hugging her, and part of me thinks that perhaps deep down Asuka actually enjoys the feeling of physical affection.

Before we get to the last point though, let me say that Asuka and Mari have scenes in 3.0+1.0 that parallel Shinji and Kaworu's from 3.0. (Fyi Kaworu loves Shinji (yeah, like that, and 3.0 was basically them being gay as fuck for an hour) so like...do I even need to explain?

And then of course there's also this, the "Take care of yourself, Princess…" line. That is the last time Mari talks to Asuka and as much as that line alone already is so much, it's Mari's expression in particular that kills me. Because this? This soft, almost bittersweet expression she has, as she basically says goodbye? Because she knows Asuka will finally be happy and safe? It just makes me feel so much actually. Man.

In the end it's a fact that Mari loved Asuka, wether that is interpreted as platonic or romantic by someone is up to them. But it is a fact that Asuka was loved enough that someone wanted to hug her, was happy to see her, to praise her, was hurt by her loss, wanted her to be safe, that someone told her "Take care of yourself…" Asuka was really and honestly so loved that someone would tell her, "I missed you."

But Asuka? Asuka was too hurt, too wrapped up in her own head to actually see how loved she was by Mari (and other people) that she genuinely believed she's completely alone and always will be alone.

It makes the "Take care of yourself" line hit even harder to me, because it's not only Mari's goodbye, but it's a goodbye during the one time Asuka allowed herself to be vulnerable and admit what she really wanted.

And honestly? All of this? Its makes me feel so many things and I just love them so much man.

#the felix talk #IM SO SORRY THIS IS SO LONG #HDMSGDMDGSJSGEH #3.0+1.0 spoilers

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buckyownsmylife · 4 years ago

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v e l o c i t y - chapter i

The one where John’s your true mate, but he doesn’t want you to be his.

In a universe where fate grants you a new mate whenever you lose yours, John has lived quite comfortably for many years with the knowledge that he was alone after Mary. That all comes crumbling down the second that he meets you. How could the universe choose someone so young to be his omega?

for general warnings and author’s notes, please go to the fic’s masterlist. It’s being constantly updated

Y/N’s P.O.V.

I could see Bobby moving around from the corner of my eyes, but I felt too tired to even just stop focusing on the bottle of beer I was holding between my hands. People were all around us - actually, exclusively men, but I didn’t really know them and didn’t really care to introduce myself.

A feeling of loneliness had covered me, like a blanket I wasn’t too sure I would be able to push aside. Because the truth was, I was alone. Now that my dad was gone, I had no one to really count on.

Just then, I felt someone squeezing my shoulder and I forced myself to smile, because I knew I was being unfair. I knew Bobby would never leave me alone, not when he was my godfather and had always cared so deeply for me. But that didn’t make any of this any less hard.

Breathing deeply, I forced myself to get up from the couch and stretch my muscles before deciding to escape through the back door just so I could get a bit of fresh air out on the porch. Too many alphas in a single house and any unmated omega like myself would start to get crazy, even when we didn’t necessarily have any reason to feel threatened. So I stood there for a bit, looking out into the plain field, just pondering about what the future would hold for me until I heard a commotion coming from inside.

Curious, I walked back into the living room just in time to see three men being warmly welcomed by the hunter community that had gathered in Bobby’s house tonight. I vaguely recognized the one who seemed to be the oldest, but his back was turned to me and so I could only really take notice of a well-used black jacket, until a strong whiff of men’s cologne took over me and I felt like I was about to faint. What the hell was going on? My insides were hurting and I thought I was going to melt, so I held myself in a tight embrace in the hopes of keeping myself together when Bobby noticed me and while he tried to move me closer to the newcomers, probably intending to introduce me to them, the smell grew stronger and stronger until I was quite literally salivating to the arome.

Bobby extended his arm to get the familiar man’s attention and I immediately stretched mine to wrap around his wrist, in need of support. “Bobby, I don’t feel so well.” I knew his head whipped to look at me but at the same time, the man turned around and the last thing I remember before fainting was looking at eyes the color of honey.

It was already morning when I came to be. The sunlight softly penetrated the thin curtains on Bobby’s guest bedroom I was already familiar with and by the sight of it, I had been quite unceremoniously dropped over the still made bed, still wearing the same clothes from last night. That much was expected, not only since there wasn’t a single female in the house and I highly doubted Bobby would have let anyone see me naked, but also since yesterday's reunion had a purpose. The hunters gathered in my godfather’s house had a strict timeline to follow, if they wanted to get rid of the vampires that had murdered my father.

So I didn’t think much about it, opting to get in the shower and wash away the sadness and confusion over yesterday’s events. I still wasn’t sure about what had happened - I certainly hadn’t ever fainted before -, but I supposed the heaviness of what I was going through had caught up to me. I hadn’t really been feeding myself properly either, I suddenly remembered. Yeah. That must have been it.

So I put on a yellow sundress that was my mother’s in the hopes that its color would cheer me up and prepared myself to get some breakfast, because by now I felt like my insides were clawing at me, begging me to get something to fill the hole inside of me. As soon as I closed the door to the room I was sleeping in, that smell hit me again. The same one that had threatened to suffocate me last night. What the fuck was going on? How did this perfume open up my already animalistic appetite?

By the time I reached the bottom of the stairs, I was certain I was wearing a scowl on my face, something I had never once before sported.

“Sweetheart…” Turning to my right, I found Bobby staring at me with a deep frown.

John’s P.O.V.

I watched Bobby try to get a hold of her from afar, and a small part of me felt smug about the fact that he feared what I would do if he touched what was mine. Then I remembered I didn’t care about this girl and made sure the best scowl I had was plastered on my face for when she looked at me.

It didn’t help that she smelled so… yummy. I wanted to eat her up whole. Still, I knew I couldn’t. Shouldn’t. Didn’t really want to - I forced myself to remember.

Fuck.

It had been too long since I’d had to deal with a mate and I forgot how strong the urge to bond can be. It didn’t help that this time I had two kids older than my omega trying not to laugh at me from behind their mugs.

“Stop that.” I slapped the back of Dean’s head, effectively making him spill a bit of coffee over his shirt, which in turn made me grin. Now we’re talking.

When my attention focused back on the girl and Bobby, they were a bit closer to each other, only on the other side of the living room, and they were talking in low voices. Suddenly, her eyes met mine and I felt it rise in me again, the need to pounce over there and dominate her.

But then she focused back on Bobby and I was left confused.

He was obviously explaining to her what had happened and that we were mates, so why didn’t she seem bothered by it? In fact, she looked as far from it as possible. If her expression was anything to go by, she was… bored?

Before long, they approached us again, and I was expecting her to throw herself at me or at least to acknowledge me as her mate in any way. That’s what I was prepared for. I knew what I was going to say to let her down as gently as possible. But what actually happened is that she went around the table and directly into the kitchen, turning on the stove.

“How about eggs and bacon for breakfast? Does anyone want some?” I swear I could hear fucking crickets singing outside, despite the fact that it was early morning. Was she really going to completely ignore me? “Hello? Eggs, bacon, answer me or you won’t be fed.” My boys jumped to action at the threat and I tried to make sense of what was happening while forcing myself to ignore just how cute she looked with her head tilted and a hand on her hip.

She cooked in silence then, not even granting me a look. I was beyond surprised by now. What the hell was I supposed to do about this?

As the plate of breakfast was laid in front of us, she took her seat next to Bobby, which just so happened to be to my left, but even then, she didn’t even glance at me, opting to munch on her food quietly. I took notice of the fact that she had a healthy appetite, instead of being one of those girls who tried to diet for the sake of impressing men, but my mind was still all over the place.

“Aren’t you going to say anything to me?” The minute the words escaped my mouth, whatever conversation my boys had been trying to maintain with Bobby immediately died down. Still, she didn’t look at me. The little girl had the nerve to seem unfazed by my presence and my question, even my irritation. She didn’t even raise her eyes to meet mine when she responded.

“Why should I?” The question caught me off guard, and the silence that followed revealed it to her. When no one intervened to break the ice, she chanced a glance up, her beautiful bright eyes meeting mine, and she sighed, at last dropping her cutlery before straightening up to talk to me.

“I’m sorry if that came off rude, but the truth is… It’s very clear that you have absolutely no interest on me as an Alpha, and since it is your responsibility to take care of me, even if it was to let me down gently, I don’t see why I’m the one who has to take your feelings into consideration and pay you the attention you didn’t grant me.”

God fucking damnit. She was already the most interesting woman I’d met in a very long time, and when I say a very long time, I mean way before she was born, when my wife - my first true mate - was still alive.

Y/N’s P.O.V.

John looked at a loss for words, and I took that as an indication that I could continue my meal without further idiotic demands. “Would you pass me the coffee, please?” I asked, pointing in the direction of the thermos, my eyes focused on my eggs. Dean reached out and poured some in my mug, which granted him a grateful smile.

“It’s huh… It’s very good coffee. Bobby tells me you’re the one who taught him how to make it like this.” That made me chuckle, and I chanced an amused glance to my godfather.

“Strong, you mean? Yeah, it’s the only way I know how to drink it.” Another uncomfortable silence. My absolute most hated thing. I quickly swallowed whatever food was left in my plate before pushing my chair away from the counter. “I have some stuff to do in the backyard… Leave the plates in the sink and I’ll clean them up when I get back. It was nice meeting you.” I nodded in their direction, stopping only to give a quick kiss on Bobby’s forehead, and left without another word or glance.

I was only able to breathe again when the back door was closed behind me and I was already a few good feet from the house. Fuck. Suddenly, I felt the urge to cry, and I knew that despite the distress I had been put under the last few days, it wasn’t only the death of my father or the refusal from my mate that was making me sad. It was those stupid omega hormones, trying to force me to go back there and beg for a forgiveness I didn’t really want.

Stupid fucking nature. I was stronger than that. I had to be. Even I had enough pride to stop me from throwing myself at the feet of someone who doesn’t want me.

I tried to distract myself from whatever the hell could be going on inside the house while taking care of the few things I could do outside of it. Granted, there wasn’t much. But anything was better than being stuck in that place, having to smell that mixture of gunpowder, scotch and cinnamon that made my head twirl. Fucking John Winchester and that delicious musk of his. I didn’t fucking need him.

It was with that thought that I popped open the hood of one of the cars Bobby and I had been working on, trying to focus on something other than my stupid body and its stupid wishes. After a few minutes of actually forcing myself to do so, I was finally able to zone out of my real-life drama and get lost in the world of carburetors and grease.

“Have you figured out what’s the problem with the engine?” The familiar voice brought a smile to my face, despite all of my current circumstances, and I found myself whipping around to stare at the boy towering over me.

“Jess!” The young beta smiled at me, always as excited to see me as I was. He’d been living near Bobby for years now, and I’d watched him grow up throughout my visits to my godfather. Now, despite being a year younger than me, he stood five inches taller, towering over my figure whenever he stood near.

“Hey there! Visitors?” He nodded towards the Impala, and I gave him a tight-lipped smile.

“Something like that. Bobby had some… friends over last night, and those are the only ones left. They’re supposed to be leaving soon enough, though.” I returned my attention to the car’s motor but the lack of sound from my usually chipper companion made me raise my gaze up to him once more. “What?” I inquired, inadvertently already smiling as I waited for his question.

“Do you hate them or what?” Chuckling, I crouched to search for one of my tools before going back to work on the engine.

“Why the question?” I didn’t really mind answering it, I was always just curious about how Jess’ mind worked. I wanted to know if I had any major tells. As someone who had seen me practically every day for the last month, could he see that I’d met my mate? Had that encounter changed me somehow?

“You don’t seem very happy to talk about them. And you’re usually excited about everything and everyone.” The idea he had of me made me snort. I tended to be someone who saw the brighter side of life, that was true, but after my father’s death, I didn’t really think I’d been able to keep up that appearance. Guess I was wrong.

“I suppose you’re right.” That’s all I said, sending a quick smile his way before returning to the task at hand. Jess helped, giving me the tools I needed when I asked for them, and I absentmindedly listened to him babble about his last year of highschool as I kept my focus on my manual work.

It was one of the reasons why I liked to help Bobby so much. When I was fixing a car, even if it was just a simple job, my mind was occupied with something else entirely. It was like my own form of meditation, only a bit dirtier.

I was almost able to forget about John Winchester and his stupid scent. Almost. If it weren’t for the periodical cramps that I tried to ignore in order not to alert my company - I definitely didn’t want to talk about it with Jess - I supposed I would have been able to forget about the Winchester men before they disappeared from my life forever.

That was, of course, until they left the house and gathered in the Impala, catching the attention of my very hyper friend. “Oh, wow. Those are Bobby’s friends? I can smell them even from here.

A very unattractive snort escaped me, and it caught Jess’ attention. “Tell me about it.”

“Oh, did they try to disturb you?” I had to smile to myself at how cute he sounded, so defensive for me.

“Not really. I’m just glad that they’re gone.” And with one last look over my shoulder, just in time to watch John back up the Impala and leave, I added, “I hope I’ll never have to see them again.”

Chapter ii ➡

#john winchester reader #john winchester x reader #john winchester reader insert #john winchester fanfiction #john winchester fan fiction #john winchester oneshot #john winchester au #john winchester imagine #john winchester imagines #my series

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reidgraygubler · 4 years ago

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a different type of high (spencer reid/reader)pt 2

Title: A Different Type of High (part two)

Request: no

Couple: spencer reid/gender-neutral!reader

Category: angst

Content Warning: swearing, talks about drugs and the usage of drugs, drug use (oxycodone), drug abuse (oxycodone and dilaudid), attending narcotics anonymous, smoking (cigarettes), drug withdrawal, mentions of possible death (but no actual death),

Word Count: 3378

Summary: reader and spencer have become best buddies after attending NA together. Reader goes to a meeting and panics when she doesn’t see Spencer there. Worried that he might have done something wrong, she calls him in a panic.

A/N: this takes place in late-ish season two early-season three when spencer is going to the NA meetings. spencer was 26 around this time, reader is about 22 :) anyways, thank you all for the love and support! check out my masterlist! and here is a mood board/pintrest board i made for the series!

Previous Part�� Series Masterlist Next Part

{***}{***}{***}

I tugged my sweater tight around my body as I walked towards the community center. I stayed a fair distance away from the doors as people entered. There were way too many people entering at once for me to go in now. The way the small crowd entered the building, with a few stragglers behind, only made me a little nervous.

It was… chilly out today. The last of the warm days were behind us now as we were heading into Winter. That would mean I’d have to find a way to and from the community center and home sooner rather than later. I wonder if Spencer would help me…

“Hey!” A woman’s voice came from beside me as I neared the doors. I looked up from the ground and looked at her. Marie, who practically became my mother after my mom died, was standing at the doorway. “You walked here?” she asked as I entered the building.

“I don’t exactly have a car, Marie, you know that,” I shrugged as I buttoned my sweater up.

“As long as you’re here, that’s all that matters,” she smiled and wrapped an arm around my body. Part of me wanted to shrug her off me, but another part of me welcomed the embrace. “Go eat something, you’re skin and bones,” she rubbed her hands up and down my arms, as if she was warming me up.

“I do eat, okay. You don’t need-Is that Shephard’s Pie?” I cut myself off when a familiar smell hit my nose. She looked at me and smiled.

“Go eat something,” she winked before leaving me alone. I sighed and looked around the room, looking at all the people around. And just like before, people were standing around and talking to each other, or sitting down. Only a few people were eating what was made. The times when people who work for the community center make food were my favorite days. Granted, they only do it once a month, very rarely was it twice a month. The food they make is always so good.

So, with that knowledge, I walked to where they were serving the food and got myself a plate. I didn’t exactly know where to sit, mostly because I didn’t want to sit beside a bunch of strangers and eat. Actually, I didn’t want to be around anyone while I ate. That left me going to the hall where the bathrooms were to eat.

I could tell tonight was going to be different. Something about the feeling of everyone was… Off? I’m not really sure how to explain it. Maybe it was the fact that I was alone, and everyone else was with someone or talking to someone. And, I was just me, sitting in the hall to the bathrooms, poking at my Shephard’s Pie.

When I finally finished eating (I took my sweet time), I brought my plate back to the kitchen. The people around were sitting in their respective chairs, waiting for the group to start. I looked around at everyone one last time before I realized something… Spencer wasn’t here.

Now, I know Spencer is a busy guy with whatever it was that he did for work. And, I know I’ve only known him for a few short weeks, if not a month. But I couldn’t help but allow my mind to wander and race to the scary thoughts that I shouldn’t have. Like, what if he made a mistake… What if he was sitting in the bathroom at his home, overdosing? Shit, shit… Shit. Or, what if he already did overdose and it’s too late. It’s bad that I allow myself to think those thoughts. I really shouldn’t.

I’m not obsessed with Spencer. Okay? He’s just the only person who’s cared about me in a long time. And, he’s the only person (and thing) I’ve cared about since… Well, since I was 15. Of course, I’m worried about him.

I swallowed roughly as I looked over at Jacob, who was sitting away from the circle, reading over some papers (probably what he was going to say during today’s meeting). He’ll know where Spencer went. I mean, Jacob knows everything about everyone here. He’s gotta know where he is.

I pulled the sleeves of my sweater so my hands were pulled inside them. I looked at the ground as I walked over to Jacob. My heart was beating so hard in my chest it was actually scaring me. I shouldn’t be this scared.

I cleared my throat when I got to Jacob. He slowly lifted his head from the folder and looked at me. Glasses were perched on the tip of his nose, and his eyes were peaking from over the frame.

“Hey, happy to see you here,” he smiled as he closed the folder and placed it to the chair beside him, “What’s up? Did you eat?” he asked, looking around me to the table of food.

“Yeah, yeah, I did,” I nodded and looked back at the ground, “Uhm… Is Spencer coming tonight? He’s usually pretty punctual to meetings… And, he’s not here. I’m just… I’m scared he might have done something,” I whispered, keeping my voice low just in case other people were listening.

“Oh, no. Spencer’s not coming tonight. He had a work trip that he had to go on. He’ll be back next week,” Jacob smiled at me. I looked back up at him, keeping my eyes on his face.

“Do you… Do you have his phone number?” I looked away from him again, worried that I’d be doing the wrong thing or invading his life. “I do believe you, Jacob. I just…” I wiped my eyes because I didn’t realize I had started crying.

“Yeah, yeah, no I understand.” Jacob fumbled his pockets for his phone before finally pulling it out. “He might not answer. So you should wait till after tonight’s meeting to call.” he looked up at me as he wrote Spencer’s number on a slip of paper. “I’ll let him know you have his number,” he smiled as he handed over the paper. I nodded before taking the paper from him and pocketing it.

“Thanks, Jacob… I appreciate it,” I whispered before turning to go find a seat. I kept my head low as I sat, not really wanting anyone to look at me. I could still feel tears rolling down my cheeks, and at this point, I didn’t know why I was crying. I think it was just the overwhelming emotions that I was feeling in general. My emotions are just too much for me and I guess this is where I’m left off.

Jacob was standing up in the circle this time, doing the greeting and welcoming everyone to the meeting. I always hated that part. Where he acts like no one is actually here, dying off coke, or oxy, or meth. But, what can I say? He’s just trying to make a good time out of a shitty situation.

I was snapped back to reality when Jacob said my name, repeatedly. I looked over at him with wide eyes.

“Do you want to go first,” he offered. I looked at him and shook my head.

“Why do you always have me first?” I whispered, mildly annoyed that he always wants me to go first to share life over the last week. “I mean, I’m a month clean if that’s what you want to hear. I have my struggles.” I sighed and looked at him.

“Do you want to expand on those struggles?” He started. I bit my lips together before shrugging.

“Last week, uh, I had a bad week. And, I guess… I have some stuff leftover. Like, hidden away. I just really wanted to not feel anything.” I looked at my lap and shook my head. “I have a friend, though. He’s helping me with my struggles and stuff. I wish I could help him as much as he helps me though,” I sighed and looked back at Jacob. “It’s really hard, not taking whatever to get high to just not exist for a short time,” I explained. I wasn’t sure if it made sense to anyone, but it made enough sense to me. And that’s all that mattered, that I knew what I meant.

“But you’re working through those struggles, and that’s a good thing. Having a support system is really important. So, your friend that you have is really good.” Jacob smiled and nodded. I stared at him before slowly nodding.

“Yeah, yeah. It is a good thing. I’ve never had a support system like him before. He’s right alongside me.” I whispered. I never really thought of Spencer as my support system. It’s true though, he is. Even if I wasn’t his. “Someone else should share,” I muttered. I made sure my tone was annoyed, just so Jacob would know to stop having me be the first to share.

{***}{***}{***}

After the meeting ended, I walked to the laundromat that was a block or two from my apartment. They had a payphone there that I’d be able to use, which is nice because I didn’t have a cell phone or home phone to use. I’ve done it before, using the laundromat’s payphone.

I knew I had some change stuffed into the pockets of my sweater. I just hope no one would be in the laundromat. Well, it was late so I don’t expect people to be doing their laundry now. Unless it was someone who didn’t want to be seen during the day, like me.

A shiver shot through my body as I entered the building. I was happy to see that there was only one person here, and it looked like they were almost done doing their load. I glanced at them as I walked to the 3 pay-phones. I sat right at the second one, my hands jingling the change in my pockets. I pulled out four quarters and the paper with Spencer’s number. My eyes scanned the numbers that had Jacob’s sloppy handwriting on it.

I picked the phone up off the hook before dialing the number. I stared at the numbers on the pad as I held the phone to my head.

“This is Spencer R-” I slammed the phone back on the hook before he could say anymore. I stared at the phone with wide eyes. My hands were shaky and I could feel my head starting to get a little dizzy. It was just the nerves, anxiety, and everything of the day hitting me all at once. I stared at the phone. I pulled all the change from my pockets and placed it on the counter. 4 quarters, which means two more calls. I swallowed roughly before dialing his number again.

“This is…” “Hi Spencer, it’s me,” I bit my lips together and closed my eyes. I pressed my free hand to my face and shook my head. “I, uh… Sorry if this was inappropriate or anything. I just… I asked Jacob for your number… And, I missed you today, sorry if that’s weird,” I blabbed, my words trailing off.

“Hey! No, no it’s okay!” Spencer spoke. His tone was happy, like whatever it was that he was doing made him happy. “Sorry I didn’t come tonight. I had work stuff happening.” He explained. So, I nodded, even though he couldn’t see me.

“Yeah, that’s what Jacob had said.” I retorted and shrugged.

“But you didn’t believe him, did you?” Spencer asked, a certain amusement in his tone. I held back my laughter and nodded.

“Well, I told him I believed him. But I didn’t really believe him,” I rested my face in my hand and leaned against the counter. “A work trip?” I asked, changing the subject back to him.

“Yeah, yeah,” his voice got low, like he tried to not be heard by whoever he was with, “Probably won’t be home till the end of next week, though,” he sounded sad.

“So, you won’t be home for the next meeting?” I frowned and tried to make it so he could hear my frown. Assuming he did because he started laughing. “God, I fucking hate Jacob, I swear,” I sighed and shook my head.

“You know, at first I didn’t understand why you hated him… But I’m starting to understand why,” he laughed. I smiled and looked around the laundromat. The previous person was gone, leaving me alone. I was happy about that. I didn’t want people listening in on my conversation. Man, it’d be awkward if he worked for the FBI or something where someone is always listening.

“He always makes me go first to share, it’s getting annoying,” I scoffed and shook my head. “Like, is it because I’m the youngest one there? Because I’ve been attending for so long?” I shook my head again because of my annoyance.

“Maybe you’ll have to ask him. Could be because you’re young,” Spencer answered. On his side of the call, I could hear papers shuffling.

“God, that’s annoying,” I scoffed, “How was your week?” I smiled, asking the question that is usually first answered in group. Spencer cackled, not just a laugh but a cackle.

“It was good. Uh, work whisked me away and I wasn’t expecting it. But, here we are.” Spencer sighed. The image I had of him in my head right now was nice. He was just sitting at a desk, coffee in front of him while he read whatever papers he needed. Wait… “What about you? What phone number is this?”

“Oh… Uh, I’m at the laundromat down the street from my apartment… I don’t have a phone,” I bit my lips together and sighed, “Uhm, but my week was meh. I mean, like… Last week was pretty rough… Not gonna lie,” I rubbed my face and shook my head, “Uh, yeah, it was just. I don’t even know why it was a rough week.”

“You didn-”

“No, no, I wanted to though,” I slouched in the chair and shook my head. “It was really hard not going to my stash… And just taking whatever I had.” I shrugged.

“One minute remaining,” an automated female voice spoke. I widened my eyes and fumbled for quarters.

“Shit,” I muttered, nearly dropping them back to the counter. I also nearly dropped the phone too.

“Is… Is everything okay?” Spencer asked, legitimate worry in his words. I sighed once I finally inserted the quarters into the machine.

“Yeah, yeah. Yep, uh… I don’t use payphones, let alone actual phones, often. And I never have quarters on me for these things,” I shook my head in annoyance. “Sorry if I scared you,” I cringed.

“It’s okay.” He replied. I sighed and shook my head. “Now that you have my number, you won’t hesitate to call me, will you?” the worry was back in his voice as he spoke. It kinda scared me how much he worried about me. I’ve never had someone worry about me like this before. What if I disappointed him? Or he disappointed me? I’m used to being a disappointment and getting disappointed. So, what’s it going to do if I get disappointed one more time?

“It’ll depend on the time of day and where I am… If I’m able to get to the laundromat, then sure. But if I’m not near a payphone or if I don’t have quarters, I probably won’t,” I answered.

“Time of day doesn’t matter. I never sleep anyway. And I assume you never sleep either,” he pointed out the obvious. I laughed and nodded.

“Okay, time of day is no worry. Then, it’ll depend on if I have quarters for the machine,” I pointed out.

“I’ll figure something out for you then,” Spencer stated. I smiled again and nodded. “What time is it?”

“Almost 10… I had to walk to the community center, and then back here.” I sighed.

“You should go to bed,” Spencer spoke firmly. I rolled my eyes and smiled.

“You’re not my real dad,” I feigned a playful disappointment in my tone. That made Spencer laugh. “I thought you died… When you weren’t at group… My mind kinda wandered and I had thoughts that weren’t the greatest,” I wrinkled my nose. My stomach sank and my body hurt slightly at the thoughts and memories of all the previous thoughts I had of earlier today.

“Hey, hey,” Spencer’s voice was soft, like he knew I was visibly upset. The kindness he had in his voice made me feel better. “If I have you in my life, I can guarantee that I won’t die,” he had a small chuckle in his tone. I smiled.

“Accountability buddies?” I asked, raising an eyebrow. The smile that was growing on my lips was probably too happy for us to be talking about death and drugs. It was Spencer’s turn to be laughing.

“Okay, okay, accountability buddies,” he agreed, his tone being as happy as my smile was.

“You know that stupid step? The one about a greater power or whatever?” I asked, tapping my fingers across the counter. Spencer laughed.

“You mean Step Two ‘We came to believe that a Power greater than ourselves could restore us to sanity.’ or Steps Five through Seven?” He asked, his tone somewhat cheery. I laughed and shook my head.

“Honestly, all of them,” I wrinkled my nose and shook my head.

“What about them?”

“What if I don’t believe in a higher power or God?” I asked. I lifted my hand and looked at my fingers around the phone cord. And with that question, Spencer hummed. I wished he got to answer the question.

“One minute remaining,” the automated voice was back, causing me to frown because I knew our time on the phone would be over soon. I really didn’t want it to be. Spencer was someone I could trust, and he knew that. He was even a better distraction to stop me from doing anything stupid.

“Get some sleep?” Spencer asked, his tone only slightly begging. I smiled and nodded. “Okay, if you nodded, I can’t see you.”

“I’ll get some sleep. I promise,” I sighed, even though I knew it was a lie. I mean, I know Spencer isn’t going to sleep either.

“How many quarters do you have?”

“On me, 4. I’m sure I have more in my apartment,” I sat up in the chair and nodded, “I’ll call you if I need you, Spencer. Thank you for letting me call you,” I wrinkled my nose.

“Of course. I’d rather have you call me instea-”

“You’ll be home next week?” I asked, cutting him off. He didn’t really need to say anything further, I knew exactly what he was going to say.

“That’s the plan. Could be sooner.” He answered, sounding upset with his own answer. “I’ll take you to get coffee when I get back?” he offered, like that’d make me happy. Okay, yeah it worked. It did make me happy.

“Coffee?” I asked, raising an eyebrow because I wasn’t sure if he actually offered to get me coffee. “Y-yeah, coffee. That sounds good,” I nodded. I’ve never gotten coffee before.

“I’ll see you then. Goodnight,”

“Goodnight, Spencer,” I smiled before placing the phone back on the receiver. I sat back in the seat and looked at the machine. My eyes then shifted down to the quarters on the countertop. I really wanted to keep talking to him, mostly because I liked talking to him. And, if he was so willing to talk to me, I’ll do it anytime.

I stared at the payphone for a moment before finally standing up. I slipped the last of my quarters and paper back into my pockets before leaving. By the time I finally got back outside, it was cold, colder than before I called Spencer. I suppose that’s what I get for wanting to make a call late at night.

When I got to my apartment, I couldn’t feel my fingers or my toes. I didn’t want to take a shower, because I really didn’t want to get cold again after the shower. So, I just slumped my way to my bedroom, not like that’ll make me any warmer.

series taglist: @shameleswhorehourstm, @itsametaphorbriansblog , @bxtchboy69

if you want to be apart of the series tag list, just let me know :)

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the-dream-team · 4 years ago

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What I Would Do

Read it on AO3

“And if you come anywhere within spitting distance of my friends again, you’ll lose a lot more than your voice, Mulciber .”

Lily Evans stared down the Slytherin whose ability to speak she’d stolen with a well-practiced Silencing Charm. Unable to spit out anymore foul language, Mulciber narrowed his eyes and stormed off towards the dungeons, accepting defeat. She turned to Mary and gave her a small smile. That problem was taken care of. For now, at least.

“Oh, that was marvelous!” came a clear, familiar voice from across the corridor. “Evans, you’re one helluva witch, have I told you that yet today?” Jamie Potter grinned at Lily, one hand clutching her stupid stolen snitch and another combing through her tangle of wild curls. Sirius Black, Remus Lupin, and Peter Pettigrew followed close behind her, as they always did. She playfully swatted Sirius’ shoulder and tugged at her shirt collar. “Padfoot, you know I can’t resist a girl who stands up against those bastard Death Eaters-in-training.” Sirius barked out a laugh.

Lily rolled her eyes. “Knock it off, Potter, or you’ll be next on my hit-list.”

Jamie’s grin only broadened. “Evans, you drive me crazy, you know that? I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again, what I would do if you started flying for the other team…”

As Jamie and her posse sauntered off down the hall, Mary sighed.

“It must be hard for her,” she said softly.

“Hard for who, Potter?” asked Lily in disbelief.

“Yes, Jamie, ” said Mary. “Having those kinds of unrequited feelings seeing as she’s the only girl here who… y’know.”

Lily’s mouth gaped open. “Mary! There are no feelings involved. Potter just can’t let go of an old joke.”

Mary raised her eyebrows. “If you say so.”

Unbelievable. Lily crossed her arms and furrowed her brow the rest of the way to the Library. Unrequited feelings my arse, she thought with a huff. Potter had been acting out the same schtick for years. She loved boasting about her deep, dramatic attraction towards Lily (most often in public places) and calling Lily’s preferences into question. It made her uneasy, and Potter knew it. Jamie liked rileing her up.

Of course, she had to admit it hadn’t started as a joke. Their third year, during a particularly rowdy Herbology lesson, Lily and Jamie got into a row over the Leaping Toadstools they were meant to be picking in the forest. After some bickering over who would be in charge of catching the mushrooms and a bit of shoving back and forth, Lily eventually threatened Jamie with a Bat-Bogey hex if she kept getting in her way.

Before she could stop herself, in front of the entire class, Jamie practically shouted, “Bloody hell, Evans, what I would do if only you were into girls.”

The heat burned so deeply on Lily’s cheeks that day, sometimes she still felt the licks of fire teasing her skin nearly four years later. The panic. The embarrassment. The fear. It all boiled up from her knotted stomach and racing heart, presenting as a disgusted expression that could only be painful for the receiving end.

Jamie’s usually confident smirk had been replaced with a gaping mouth and... were those tears welling in her eyes?

After the initial shock, Lily tried softening her expression, but the damage was done. In an instant, Jamie swiped a hand under her glasses, ran another through her fringe, and put on a forced lopsided grin. “So, er, you’ll keep me updated if anything changes, yeah?”

She let out a laugh, looking for the boys to back her up. They chuckled along with her the best they could while Jamie shrugged to the class and went back to their Toadstools, avoiding Lily’s eye for the rest of the lesson.

A stormcloud of guilt brewed in Lily’s chest the following weeks. Jamie had taken to staying in the boy’s dorm to avoid any kind of contact with her and the other girls. Sirius had stepped up, becoming extra protective of her and sending daggers at anyone who dared to even glance in Jamie’s direction. Lily tried getting her alone to apologize for weeks before eventually cornering her and Remus one day after Defense Against the Dark Arts.

“Potter,” said Lily, breathless as she chased her down the hallway, “please, I wanted to talk to you.”

Jamie spun around with a dazzling smile. “Evans! Coming to tell me you’ve finally changed your mind?”

The flirtatious wink sent Lily over the edge, her planned speech quickly abandoned. “Oh, you’re impossible!”

“Don’t worry, love,” Jamie casually laughed, “take your time, I can wait.”

Completely speechless and beyond flustered, Lily had no choice but to storm away. She was thirteen and emotional, and years away from controlling the way her feelings manifested themselves. So for the following weeks (and then years) as Jamie kept up the teasing, Lily responded emphatically with thunderous huffs and exaggerated scoffs.

By seventh year, their routine became so practiced, Lily barely noticed her heart skip anymore when Jamie shot off her endless string of compliments. Barely flinched when Potter suggested there could be a question of Lily’s tastes.

There weren’t any questions.

She didn’t fancy girls.

Had there been close calls through the years? Sure.

On a warm spring day down by the lake, when Dorcas placed an innocent hand on Lily’s thigh while laughing at a dumb joke, had Lily’s stomach somersaulted in a not-totally-unpleasant way? Yes. Had she spent the next few months secretly hoping it would happen again? Possibly.

Had there been times where Lily caught her eyes wandering to the hems of skirts or lingering on Jamie’s impossibly long eyelashes, only magnified by those stupid, round wire-rimmed lenses? It didn’t matter.

Those moments weren’t real. They never formed as full sentences in her head, mentally blocked before they took shape. The heat on her leg left behind from Dorcas’s touch didn’t mean anything if she didn’t give it a name. Ideas could float untethered around her mind as long as they never met the ground.

The thoughts she had about boys were real. Shared giggles with Mary about Sirius Black’s sharp jawline or Amos Diggory’s playful charm flowed with ease. Her crush on Remus Lupin during their fourth year terrified her to admit out loud, but there had never been a question about whether she was allowed to let her imagination run wild over his floppy sandy hair and pleasant quiet smile. Boys were easy.

The thought of liking girls never would have crossed her mind if Jamie hadn’t said those words to her in Herbology all those years ago. Lily hadn’t even known that was an option before. Perhaps if Jamie had kept her mouth shut, if she hadn’t spent the next four years poking and prodding at Lily’s very secure sexuality, then Lily would never have found herself repeating the whispered phrase in her mind,

Please don’t let me fancy girls. Please, please don’t let me fancy girls.

***

On one unusually warm and breezy day in March, Professor Slughorn called for Lily to stay behind for a moment after Potions. She waved on her friends, promising to meet them at the Great Hall later for lunch, and happily made her way to the front of the classroom.

“Miss Evans!” boomed Slughorn. “I had a favor to ask of you if you’d be up to it.”

“Of course,” she said. The Potions Professor had always been one of her biggest supporters at Hogwarts and she rarely passed up an opportunity to lend a hand.

“You see, I’ve completely run out of Flobberworm Mucus and I’ve got a lesson on Sleeping Draughts for my first years this afternoon.” He checked his watch and shook his head as a group of fourth years started parading into the dungeons. “And as you can see, I’ve got classes back to back until then! My dear, would you mind running down to Pippen’s Apothecary during your lunch break? I can write you a note and let Minerva know you’ll be popping down to Hogsmead for just a moment…”

“I’d be more than happy to,” said Lily, eager to get outside and stretch her legs. The prospect of getting to see the little village outside of the usually scheduled trips thrilled her.

“Wonderful!” said Slughorn, summoning a piece of parchment and adding his signature in a swooping, elegant script. “A tankard of mucus should do, and of course they know where to bill it to.”

Lily grabbed the note with a grin and spun on her heel to head out the door, practically skipping on her way out.

The moment she stepped outside the castle, her lungs filled with a humid air, fresh from the previous night’s rain. Puddles littered the pathways, serving as an extra reminder to enjoy the sunny weather when it managed to crash through the otherwise constant cover of clouds. With a squeal of excitement, Lily shrugged off her robes and rolled up her sleeves, letting the warm breeze wash over her skin and whip through her hair.

A rare taste of independence played on Lily’s lips, curling up the corners into a wide smile. She held onto the precious moment alone, briskly walking towards the village as she imagined what life outside of Hogwarts had in store for her. Adulthood approached as quickly as the little shops and bustling pathways of Hogsmeade Village, and soon she reached her destination.

Faint, tinkling bells announced Lily’s arrival as she stepped through the front door of Pippen’s Apothecary. Sunlight poured through the large front windows, soaking the rows of shelves with a golden glow. Bundles of herbs, jars of multi-colored liquids, and barrels of crystals lined the shop’s walls and overflowed into its hallways. And towards the front of the store, a knobly old man in a well-worn cloak stroked a mewing black cat with round, yellow eyes.

“Welcome to Pippens,” he smiled. “It’s not a Hogwarts weekend, is it?”

Lily ignored the disappointed pang of being recognized as a student and approached the front counter. “No, sir, it’s a tuesday,” she said. “I’ve just been sent by Professor Slughorn to pick up a tankard of Flobberworm Mucus.”

“Ah, of course,” said the man, squinting down at Lily’s note. “Old Horace runs through that mucus faster than a unicorn during a solar eclipse.”

She let the unfamiliar metaphor fall to the side with a chuckle and watched the shopkeeper shuffle back into his storage closet. The cat nudged Lily’s arm with a soft meow, unflinching towards the clanking and bumping sounds of the man pouring a thick liquid into a pint-sized container.

“I’ve put Horace’s invoice in the bag here,” said the man, handing over a canvas tote with the mucus lovingly wrapped up inside. “He knows where to find me!”

Lily thanked him with and grin and gave the cat another scratch behind the ears before turning to leave.

“Now you didn’t hear this from me,” called the man as Lily was halfway out the door, “but Fortescue’s brought his ice cream cart out for the first warm day of the year, and I hear he’s handing out free samples.” He sent a cheery wink in her direction.

“Oh, thank you, sir!” Lily beamed and she waved goodbye.

Ice cream sounded lovely.

The cart wasn’t hard to find, as a small crowd of villagers had lined up to take advantage of Fortescue’s deal. The giddiness of being surrounded by adults in the real world fluttered back as Lily queued with other shopkeeps on their lunch breaks and locals enjoying an afternoon on the streets. When it came her turn to order, she received a generous sample of the mint chocolate chip and a sweet smile from Florean Fortescue himself.

She couldn’t dream up a more perfect afternoon. Lily walked slowly through the streets of Hogsmead, determined to drink in as much of the gorgeous day as possible. The trees, just starting to bud, swayed back and forth rhythmically, and the grass, freshly watered, still smelled like a new morning’s dew. She watched the witches and wizards stroll down the pathways. A short man with a top hat chased after a yappy dog while a large wizard peered down at his comically small pocket watch, and on a bench across the street from where she stood, two witches took turns sharing an ice cream cone.

Lily’s heart skipped a beat as her eyes locked onto the women sitting together on the bench. They looked to be in their late twenties or possibly early thirties. Both wore fashionable cloaks with trendy hairstyles and one of the women was reading a well-loved book in between licks of chocolate ice cream, her feet propped up on the bench, and her shoulder leaning against the other woman. A warmth flooded Lily’s chest as her heartrate quickened watching the pair, shocked by how lovely she found the simple scene.

Lily watched as the reading witch, not taking her eyes from her book, angled her head to ask for another bite of ice cream, but instead of bringing the cone to her lips as she had done before, the other woman surprised her with a quick kiss. The overwhelming flood of emotions burst from Lily’s chest in a gasp.

She wanted what she saw before her. She wanted the lazy afternoon sitting on a bench, curled up with a book and an ice cream cone and a girl to lean against.

Her mind raced with thoughts crashing to the ground with such force that their echos reverberated through her entire body, making her knees week and hands tremble. Every blurry idea in her head racked into focus, each half formulated sentence allowed itself to be completed with an exclamation point. Lily stared ahead at the bench where the possibilities of her future blew open like a firework spreading across the night sky.

After what felt like ages of watching the two witches, Lily finally peeled her gaze away and forced herself to make her way back to Hogwarts. Every step felt like walking on clouds as she practically floated up the road towards the castle. That is until she came face to face with another girl wearing a school uniform and a stupidly happy grin on her face.

“Potter?”

“Evans?”

Jamie had appeared in front of her out of thin air.

“What are you doing at Hogsmeade?” asked Lily, praying her shaking voice wasn’t too obvious. She hadn’t been prepared to see Jamie while her emotions were this heightened. The pounding of her heart beat into her eardrums and threatened to leap out her throat. Jamie wore her usual crooked smile, so effortless on her soft features, mirrored perfectly in those mischievous hazel eyes.

“I could ask you the same question,” said Jamie, cocking an eyebrow. That feeling of anger Lily associated with Potter and her teasing bubbled up to the surface. But it wasn’t anger she felt. It was fear. A deep fear of how Jamie’s playful jokes made her stomach flutter and her cheeks blush. And now that Lily’s image of herself grew clearer in her mind’s eye with every passing moment, she no longer had the capacity to bottle up and explain away the fear she felt when looking at Jamie Potter, who had always made her feel this way.

Feeling so desperately alive, she had to do something.

“I’m running an errand for Professor Slughorn,” she said calmly, “but I can assume you don’t have an excuse to be outside the castle.”

“Ah, you caught me, Evans,” said Jamie with a chuckle. “Look, I was just popping down to Honeydukes to pick Remus up his favorite chocolate bars. I could’ve taken the tunnel- and I probably should’ve considering our little run-in here- but it’s such a lovely day that I said screw it and walked the path instead.” She shrugged her shoulders, not looking too disappointed about being discovered.

Lily narrowed her eyes and put all of her efforts into provoking Jamie. “Well, maybe I should just say screw it and give you a month's worth of detentions, Potter.”

It worked. Jamie’s eyes widened like saucers and her smirk grew into a proper grin. “Oh, Evans, stop that, you’re making me blush! Merlin, what I would do if you ever switched your fancies.”

Jamie had walked right into her trap. With a deep breath and a pointed stare, trying to convey every feeling exploding through her body, Lily responded, “What would you do?”

Jamie froze, clearly never expecting a reply to the scenario she so often suggested.

Lily ignored the flush spreading across her face and continued. “What would you do if I told you I fancied girls. If I fancied you. ” Her heart thudded so painfully against her chest, she thought she might be sick.

Jamie stood slackjawed, not breaking eye contact, like a deer in headlights. The girl who always had a quick comeback or a smart retort for every situation had been rendered speechless. The painful reality that Jamie’s previous words had no intent of action behind them crashed over Lily like a wave breaking in the middle of an ocean storm. And now the drops of saltwater spilled over, stinging the corners of her eyes.

“Enjoy your time in the village, Potter,” she said softly as she turned away from Jaimie, escaping the nightmare as quickly as possible.

The ground, which had felt weightless only a moment ago, became hard and cruel under her feet as she trudged back up the path to the castle. How could she be so stupid? Why did she allow her bursting adrenalin to make her do something so reckless?

“Evans!” Jamie shouted from behind, but Lily wouldn’t turn around, couldn’t let Potter see the tears welling in her eyes. “Lily, wait!”

A hand clutched Lily’s wrist and tugged back hard, spinning her whole body around in a flash. Two gentle palms grasped the side of her head and cupped her cheek while hazel eyes bore into her own. Jamie Potter’s face was inches from her own, dazed and flustered and looking for a clue.

Lily responded instinctually with the only clue Jamie needed. A laughing smile of uncontainable joy.

Jamie crashed forward, meeting Lily’s lips in an exhilarating kiss that set her nerve endings on fire. Soft and firm, the years of pent up emotion spilled between their mouths and hands and bodies as they drew closer to one another. Lily ran her fingers through Jamie’s wonderful hair and bumped her adorable wire-rimmed glasses with her nose. She never could have known how good this would feel.

When they finally came up for air, Jamie’s face glowed with shock and happiness under the sunlight, her cheeks flushed and eyes unbelieving. Lily couldn’t help but pull her into a tight embrace and commit the feeling of her to memory, never wanting to live in the dark ever again.

“Hey, Jamie?” Lily asked into the girl’s shoulder. “Do you want to go get ice cream with me?”

Jamie tightened the hug, nearly suffocating Lily in the best possible way. “Oh, Evans, what I would do to get ice cream with you.”

#fem!jily february #femslash february #jily #jily fic #dylan writes #fem!james potter #wlw #harry potter #fanfic

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sonia7atm · 4 years ago

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BRIDGERTON BOOK SERIES REVIEW.

So here it is, before I start I just wanted to say that I’m in no way shape or form an expert in english or literature for that matter. English is my third language and I’m studying science. Having said that, I have read all eight books in less than two weeks and I have a lot of opinions that I wanted to share so here they are. Obviously: SPOILERS AHEAD

The series in its entirety

The bridgerton series is probably the best written series that I have ever read. I loved the fact that it is made up of 8 books, but also the way the books are structured. In each of the books we focus on one of the siblings and their significant others, and even when the side characters are there, they are not really a main focus of the story. This means you can pick up a random Bridgerton book without having read the other ones and you would not feel like you are missing something. I really liked this because it meant that with each book you were getting to know a different sibling, thus you are never really bored and there wasn’t unnecessary drama happening with the already established couples, which is refreshing at the least.

However, it does have setbacks. In some of the books, you find that this side characters really change from the way they appear in the background or the other novels, and it can be difficult to digest at first. Another flaw that I found is with the brothers' books. When I was reading some of the books dedicated to the men of the family sometimes I found that we don’t spend enough time with them and when you finish the books you don’t have an understanding of who they are. Maybe I’m not making sense but I’ll elaborate in each book a little bit more.

But in the end, even these little flaws, I had a great time reading the books and finding out what was happening with the family.

My favourite book - AOFAG

I know some people have trouble ranking the Bridgerton books, especially, the favourite one, but I’m not one of them. I am obsessed with “An offer from a gentleman”, I love the story, I love Sophie, I love Benedith and I love Violet Bridgerton with all of my heart. This book is great from the start, even though b, the third book you know a happy ending is what the book is leading to, it still excites you and makes you wonder. AMAZING DARE I SAY.

Sophie is one of my favourite characters in all of the books. She has a strong morals system and you get really inspired by her. All of the things she goes through are horrible, but she still remains such a calm and kind individual that I cannot help but stan. HARD. She has very strong ideas and morals and she sticks with them even when they mean losing Benedict. I found this message really important and powerful because we usually see the opposite: people changing their views for their significant other, and I don’t think it's right. So, hereby I declare Sophie QUEEN of the Bridgerton clan.

Moving on to Benedict, I heard a little bit of criticism with his actions in this book and I see where they are coming from, but I don’t share them. I think Benedict is one of the brothers that suffers from a really deep female counterpart and as such his thoughts are not fully explored. In my opinion Benedict is tormented by the fact that he is the second Bridgerton and nothing more (similar to Colin and kinda Gregory really), and also by the fact that he lost the woman at the ball. On top of that, Sophie comes along and he starts falling for her and he feels guilty that he is falling for someone else, so he doesn’t fully commit to Sophie but also doesn’t really leave her. It’s a messed up situation and he doesn’t make the best decisions but I understand his actions and I support him. The only thing that really annoyed me about Benedict is that he doesn’t recognize Sophie at all. I wanted to hit him, hard, in the head, with a fucking piano.

Now the best of the best: Violet Bridgerton. She was the surprise character of this book in that prison scene. In the previous book you still see her and like her but she saves the day in this one, and I felt like I really knew her after that. She is not the typical ton mother, she really values their children’s happiness and takes everyone under her wing. She knows who she is and the importance her family has and she uses her powers for good. I gained so much respect for her. A surprise character and a great one.

To sum it up, Benedict and Sophie are perfect to each other, like this mellow entity. Two kind souls, always happy, always calm. Of course they live in the countryside, they could not live anywhere else.

Top tier books - WHWW, RMB, TVWL

WHEN HE WAS WICKED

This book wrecked me, I have to admit I was a mess, I could not deal. A tragic story with so much longing and guilt and despair, I love a drama, man this is great. I went in knowing the basics of it but I was not prepared.

The poor Francesca has the most devastating story in my opinion: she suffers from infertility, her husband dies, she doesn’t feel like she fits in her family, and when she falls in love Michael is sick, WHY?!. Throughout the book you get to see how strong she is, how strong-willed she is. We are not talking about this enough. She loves with all her heart and she suffers with all of it too. She and Michel have a really strong chemistry and it translates really well. I think she was really clever to wait and think before committing to Michael, and I see how she would need to see him in danger to really let herself fall completely. In the end, she knows what losing someone you love feels like and she doesn’t want to feel that again. I understand. Also, an important part of Francesca's journey is to realize that loving someone else doesn’t diminish her feelings for John, and I love how Michael acknowledges it.

Michael is a really interesting character who falls in love at first sight with the wrong woman. He is fully aware of this fact and it is really good to see that he doesn’t doubt his love for her, but is instead aware of the impossibility of doing something about it. Even when he can do something about it, his respect for his cousin is always present. The guilt he feels for loving Francesca both when John was alive and after he died is so different but so well written. It’s eating him up and It is painful to read to be honest. However, I found that said guilt disappeared rather quickly after his conversation with Colin. I may be the only one but I was a little bit put off by it, and that’s why this is not my favourite book in the series.

THE VISCOUNT WHO LOVED ME

The bees, I could talk about the bees for days after reading this one. This one has a lot of Bridgerton backstory, and it explains so much of the rest of the bunch even if not directly. So I would say not to skip it (but why would you skip any of them?).

Kate Sheffield is one of the best written characters in this series. She is complex, fierce but delicate, confident but self-conscious. I would kill for her, she deserves it. Her family dynamics are impeccable. You feel the love between these three women and the roles they have, and you get them really quickly: Edwina is the little sister, a little naive but good-hearted, Kate is the fierce older sister and Mary is the compassionate step-mother. I really enjoyed their dynamics. The introduction of Kate’s character is by presenting her goal for the season: defend her sister. When Anthony enters the pool of suitors, she obviously opposes and their back and forth shows she is very witty. But as the story goes on we get to see her insecurities and fears, in a way that it’s so in character but at the same time so different from the start. It’s amazing and I can see why she is such a fan favourite.

Anthony is a baby.We can see how Edmund’s death really scarred him, and those wounds are deep. He believes in his own demise so blindly that it is conditioning all of his decisions.He grows a lot until he is able to share them with Kate and they bond so beautifully over it. Getting to see that, was something that I loved and enjoyed so much. It makes you really connect with both of the characters and it explains so much of his behaviour, that even if he frustrates you, you can’t be mad because you understand where he comes from.

Newton is the guest star in this one and I would like to take our time to appreciate the captain of the Kanthony ship. This little dog is such a plot device, put there to cause havoc and bring Kate and Anthony together, it is so funny. He smelled Anthony and decided he wanted a new dad. Put a plan in march, probably alerted his friend, THE bee.

ROMANCING MR BRIDGERTON

The message of this book is amazing. The journey they both go through to re-know each other is beautiful. Penelope and Colin have known each other for years, and they both have a version of the other in their minds but as the story progresses they unveil hidden personality traits about each others and I love how it is acknowledge and developed into a clear message of “people are flawed and not the perfect individual you wish them to be, and that’s ok”. It is really necessary and it made me reflect on my own relationships and how I could improve them. Colin and Penelope have to be my favourite couple of the series, but, because they were because of the show and not the books, when I finished this book I was left feeling like I wanted more, and that is why it is not my favourite one.

This is the book where readers find out Penelope is Lady Whiseldown and it is a big plot line. However, this revelation is maybe halfway through the book and until then, Penelope's inner monologue doesn’t reveal anything. I would have loved to really focus on it and know from the start how she really did it but at the same time, we get to see so much of Pen’s growth anyways. She is shy and kind but when she is with someone she trusts (in this case Colin and Lady Danbury), she is full of wit and boldness. I see myself so much in these characteristics that I cannot help but make her my favourite character in the series (totally biased but it is what it is). She starts with a sense of discontent about her, she knows her fate and accepts it but, she doesn’t necessarily like it. She is trying to change the way people see her and Lady Danbury helps a lot with it. She and Colin spend a lot of the book kind of on opposite sides in part because of their own demons, she wants to prove herself and at the same time is faced with the realization that the Colin she made up in her mind is not the real one. It really makes you wonder if it’s a happy ending at the end of it, because they both have such strong points but they are so diverse. At the end, after they talk about it, their relationship is full of devotion and you feel how they are making each other focused and better. I would die for them.

Colin is such a tumultuous character and it is a stark contrast on how we get to see him in the previous and following books. He is used to putting the charm on and fooling everybody but, of course, in this book we explore his inner workings and now we know the truth. He is just a lost puppy, looking for something to do with his life, and he is so focused on this search and runnin away for his family that he doesn’t see that there is already something that he is good about: writing. His relationship with Pen is obviously key in all of this searching because it pushes his limits and makes him think. His realization, of both his vocation and his love are slow and steady. He sometimes jumps to conclusions and rushes things *ahem*the proposal*cough* but not love, and once he commits he does it fully. The “stay, stay, stay” scene is a monumental hallmark in the book. We see Colin really deciding and choosing Penelope and Lady Whistle down with all that it entails. And later on, he opens out about his jealousy over her work, but he does it when he is ready, and Pen allows him to come to her when he needs without judgement. They are so perfect it hurts.

The lack of Eloise is an insult to my soul but we get Lady Danbury as the guest star. She is on Penelope's corner helping her navigate the ton and her relationship with Colin, as a mother figure would. I believe she at least has a big suspicion that she is LW, but I might be wrong.

All-nighter books - OTWTTW, IIHK. ON THE WAY TO THE WEDDING

Gregory’s book is full of twists and turns that you just cannot put it down. Not the fact that the main female character is Lucy and not Hermoine, like Gregory thinks half of the book, just because you don’t. It is pretty clear that Lucy is our heroine so the fact that Gregory falls for her is not a twist itself because we (and Kate) already know. But in my opinion, the fact that it starts with Gregory interrupting the wedding and then it goes back and explains the backstory to you, so it is constantly leading up to it.

Lucy is not the most interesting of the female leads but it is part of her charm. She is a normal girl, her life is already arranged, so she doesn’t feel the pressure the rest of them do, she is just enjoying herself. She doesn’t believe in love, and it is so funny how in denial she is about it, until it all explodes.

Gregory’s life was influenced by her brothers before him and his big family but he feels so alone because of the age difference. He is trying to find his place in life and, because he saw all of his siblings fall in love he wants the same thing so badly, that he confuses desire with love. He is so precious, and must be protected at all costs.

The last few chapters are action packed, there’s an urgency in everyone's actions: Lucy, trying to save her family and Gregory, trying to save Lucy. I couldn’t figure out what was going to happen and that hooked me. The fact that the wedding actually takes place is the most shocking plot of all of the books.

To conclude, Gregory owns my heart and I trust him with it.

IT’S IN HIS KISS

This story is another “all-nighter”, because it revolves around a mystery and the search for Gareth’s grandmother lost jewels. This quest brings Hyacinth and Gareth together, with a lot of Lady Danbury’s help. It’s really interesting to read about the felonies they commit, all of them instigated by Hyacinth, who, in my opinion, is chaos personified.

Hyacinth is the most forward-thinking woman of this series. She is outspoken, confident, loud and apologetic. All of these traits really set her apart, because she doesn’t play by the rules of society, she does what she pleases, and she should. She is the typical little sister, a little spoiled but with a good heart. Her conversations with Violet are really touching.

Gareth on the other side, is not in a good place with his family, and it is endearing to see how shocked he is by the Bridgerton’s closeness. He has a severe lack of self love, and sees himself as an imposter, and not worthy of Hyacinth. But when he falls, OMG, HE FALLS. His attitude towards Hyacinth’s personality is amazing because he loves her exactly as she is, and knows he will be following her orders for the rest of his life. Adorable. (He is the “That’s my wife” meme).

Lady Danbury is again the guest star and it only helps to cement her as the cool grandma that we all aspire to be. An honorable mention is Anthony getting super-duper happy that all of his sisters are married and therefore he is free (my poor guy).

However, the main issue I have with this book is that the decision of getting married is really attached to Gareth’s need to vex his father, who is a horrible person, and it makes me mad.

Not my favourite books - TSPWL, TDAI

TO SIR PHILIP WITH LOVE

In this book Eloise decides running off to meet a possible husband is a great idea. Her brain, I can’t. Obviously the Bridgerton brothers follow her and force the two to marry anyways, although they were already falling in love when they found her. Phillip, Eloise's love interest is a loner and lives outside of the ton and I think that these traits really work with her because they are polar opposites but at the same time they fit so well. The relationship Eloise has with Amanda and Oliver is so cute, because you can see that these kids just need some attention and help navigating the world without her mother and Eloise is there for them.

However, even though I loved their storyline and I wanted to rank this higher I couldn’t. The other Bridgertons are a big part of this book and when I was thinking back on it the parts that I remember fondly the most are when Anthony, Benedict, Colin and Gregory arrive to kill talk to Philip, and then when Charles is ill and we get to see Benedict and Sophie as parents. So, I like this book because of side characters and not the main ones, even though I know there is nothing wrong with them. However, I do think the book is ok and I would recommend it nevertheless.

THE DUQUE AND I

I don’t have much to say about this book. The r*pe is completely unnecessary in my opinion. Daphne and Simon have terrible communication skills, but so do Kate and Anthony, for example, but still, the repercussions are not that severe. It is so much worse in the books and it has no consequences whatsoever. Up until that point, the enemies to secret dating to falling in love is such a classic thorpe that I usually like, but I cannot separate the two of them. In fact, I would advise to skip this one.

Hapily Ever After

Thank you to the heavens for this book. It is just a little exploration of all of the sibling’s future and an extra story for Violete.

Daphne’s story revolves around her last pregnancy. A surprise one when she is quite old. I found it really sweet and it looks like she and Simon are really happy with their life so good for them. Also, Colin and Penelope visit with all of their children so I’m obligated to like it.

The TVWLM continuation is a get together in Aubrey Hall for a Pall Mall rematch. I had so much fun reading it and getting to see all of the Bridgertons interact in a “relaxed” manner.

Sophie and Benedict’s story focuses on Posy and her search for a husband. She is lovely and I do want her happiness but getting to see Sophie and Benedict interact while actually together was a treat. I feel very blessed to see them be the balls of sunshine they both are.

Then we get to see how Eloise found out Lady Whisheldow’s identity. It was fun, and we get to see Pen and Eloise being friends, which we don’t get enough of in their respectives books. Colin and Penelope leaving the wedding early, was a gem. They are a couple of horny idiots and I love to see it. After that, we focus on Eloise again and we get to see a little bit more about Amanda and Oliver.

One of the main things about Francesca in her book is the fact that she wants a baby, and it is never resolved. In this one, we get to see how Francesca and Michael become parents and it's another heartbreaking one. We get to see how worried Violet is for her and also how Michael and Francesca talk and understand each other. They are one of the best relationships on this series, I said what I said.

In IIHK the diamonds are never found, but we find them here. It is great to know they were not missing and also a relief to know that Gareth was able to rescue the family even without them. The fact that Isabella actually finds them and proceeds to say nothing is hilarious. But when Hyacinth finds them the happiness she feels is so wholesome.

Then we get to see Gregory and Lucy’s twins be born (their 8th and 9th children). It is not an easy task and for a moment I was afraid for Lucy but it all works out in the end. It was filled with great moments but the one that I like the most is when Gregory says that Katherine gave him purpose in life, because he was meant to be a dad. I cried ngl.

And lastly, we meet Edmund. He is very present throughout the book but I was not expecting to grow so attached to him with this little story. It is divided in different stages of Violet’s life and obviously we get to see her romance with Edmund. I loved the little details, his behaviour reminded me of Gregory but he eats a lot like Colin so it is great to see where they get their traits from. The later parts, after he dies, show you how much importance Violet puts on remembering him and preserving his memory. They were truly soulmates, and it is such a shame that their time together was cut short.

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13uswntimagines · 4 years ago

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A Little Luck, a Little Courage and a Protective Streak (Lindsey Horan x Reader)

Request: lindsey horan imagine where during the game r keeps getting fouled and linsey goes after the player who keeps fouling her girlfriend??

Warning: Slight language/ homophobia

Authors note: Hey dudes, there might be a hint of Soran at the end, because I just couldn’t help myself. Let me know what you think, or if you have any requests or if you just want to say sup. I hope you enjoy!

You glared up at the sun as the coursing pain ran down the side of your leg. You had known that going against your previous team, The NC Courage, was going to suck, but you hadn’t thought it was going to suck this much.

You and Hinkle didn’t have a great past, hell she had tried to end your career on many occasions, but you had thought that between Crystal, Sam and Abby you would have been safe. But instead of staying in her very avoidable left-back position, she had taken to following and fouling you across the field.

You had spent more time laying on the pitch then trying to score, and it wasn’t even the first half hydration break yet. It seemed that Courage was going to retain their first place spot by incapacitating the Thorns, literally.

“You alright babe?” Lindsey asked, jogging up beside you and extending her hand to help you to your feet. She shot a glare over your shoulder at Jaelene Hinkle, as she assisted you to your feet.

“Fine, just a bruise,” You grumbled into her shoulder as she wrapped a protective arm around you. You felt fist clenched behind your back as Hinkle passed the two of you, sending a wink your way.

“If she tackles you when you’re nowhere near the ball again, I’m going to lose it,” She huffed into your ear, and a shiver went down your spine. You smirked against her neck. Was it the time to play this game, no, but nothing was going to stop Hingle Jingle from being an ass. So you might as well make the most of a shitty situation, you were always a bit of a brat.

“How’s your hip?” You inquired, running a hand lightly over the body part in question, veering over to skate over the edge of her bottom. Her hand grabbed yours with lightning precision.

“Don’t get smart with me,” Lindsey growled, her eyes flashing dangerously. You smirked back.

“What, you going to punish me, Daddy?” You hummed, batting your eyelashes at the woman, who just halfheartedly rolled her eyes at you.

“I think Mrs. Daniels is doing that enough herself.” She said sternly, raising her eyebrow and sending you her best ‘behave’ glare.

“You’re no fun,” You wined, pouting dramatically.

“Whatever you say, babe,” Lindsey smirked, placing a chaste kiss on your lips before jogging off to her spot.

“You guys are fucking disgusting. At least there aren’t any fans here for you to corrupt,” Hinkle said from where she was marking you 8 feet away, and though you knew it was childish, you stuck your tongue out at her and laughed at her glare. She had nothing on Lindsey.

——

Apparently, your sassiness had not been well received, because Hinkle seemed to get even more aggressive with you particularly after the first half water break. Lindsey did what she did best and sent you a beautiful cross, placing the ball directly at your feet, where you did what you do best and fired at the goal. However, you missed Sam Murphy’s diving save because were again brought to the ground by a very late tackle.

“Fuck,” You yelled out, grabbing the ankle that Hinkle had just taken out. You rolled on your stomach, holding the offending appendage and resting your head on the hot turf.

“Shit, you ok?” Sam’s voice broke through your internal monologue as a warm hand began to rub circles onto your back, encouraging you to turn over again. You complied with a groan, barely catching a glimpse of blond hair as your girlfriend sprinted past you.

“Stay the fuck away from her,” Lindsey bellowed, getting very close to Hinkle’s face.

“Just doing my job,” The woman smirked at your very irate girlfriend.

“Your job my ass, you’re fucking targeting her,” Lindsey snarled, stepping nose to nose with the errant defender.

You and Sam shared nervous looks. Sure Lindsey wasn’t opposed to getting cards, but this was a little excessive.

“Maybe I am. What are you going to do about it?” Hinkle spat back, shoving you Blond Middy backward. You watched in horror as Lindsey’s jaw clenched and she rose to her full height, taking a menacing step forward. Sam stood from her kneeling position next to you and rushed to wrap her arms around Lindsey’s middle before she could rip Hinkle's head off.

“How about I shove my cleat so far up your stuck up-“ Lindsey snarled, fighting against Sam’s hold. You knew that if you didn’t step in, your girlfriend was going to put Hinkle in the hospital.

“Linds?” You said quietly, but it was enough, her head snapped towards you, her eyes softening. Her entire being relaxed as you approached her, Sam relaxing as well.

“Watch it,” Lindsey threw over her shoulder before stepping into your embrace.

“You ok babe?” She questioned, holding you at arm's length, and looking you over. Taking in the way you favored your left leg. You rolled your eyes at her.

“Yeah, but we need a goal before you get arrested and she gets put in the hospital,” You grumbled under your breath.

Lindsey’s eyes darkened “Don’t even joke about that,” she muttered. You sent her a half-hearted nod, you weren’t joking considering that was where this whole thing was heading.

You glanced behind your girlfriend watching as the courage reset their defense, a smile stretching across your face as an idea hit you. A crazy idea that would render the Courage's backline useless.

“Send me a Volley?” You smirked, bumping Lindsey’s shoulder. Her wide blue eyes snapped to meet yours.

“You’re joking?” She said with a halfhearted chuckle.

“Nope.” You grinned back, watching the wheels turn in her head. “Unless you’re scared. I’m sure Sonnett would do it if she was here, what until she-“ You started with a taunt.

“I’ll do it, just don’t miss,” She interrupted, her eyes turning hard, her face stony. You and Emily were the pranksters of the group, and you were always making fun of Lindsey for being responsible. Bringing up your other girlfriend was always a sure-fire way to get Lindsey to try whatever crazy plan you had. Even this crazy crackpot plan.

“When do I ever,” You winked, jogging off to your position, but not before you heard her mumble a “Cocky little shit,” under her breath. At least you were her Cocky little Brat.

——

The ball was perfect. You watched as Britt sent the ball to Lindsey who kicked it high. You were standing just outside the penalty box, when you kept up, slamming your foot into the ball in a perfect bicycle kick, despite the body slamming into your own.

The next moment, you were laying on your back, staring at the sky and very confused as to how you got there. You placed a hand in your swimming head, rubbing your nose which had begun to throb. Your eyes widened when your hand slipped through a sticky substance on your face, your cheek stung. You placed your sticky hand on the ground in an attempt to sit up, only to be held down by gentle hands on your shoulder.

“Hey Y/n, try not to move alright?” Sam’s voice was quiet compared to the pounding in your head, her blurred face moved into your line of vision.

Lindsey was furious. Storming across the field when she saw Hinkle's knee landing solidly on your face. You crumpled to the ground, while the left-back stood up with a satisfied smirk, dusting herself off.

“What the fuck is your problem,” Lindsey roared as she got in Hinkle's face, shoving her backward.

“Just-“ Hinkle started, only to be stopped by another rough shove.

“Don’t give me that bullshit, you could have killed her,” Lindsey growled, advancing in the defender.

“I wouldn’t be so lucky, at least then she wouldn’t be able to spread your disease,” Hinkles smirked. Which both of you out of commission, Portland would be done for. The ref came sprinting over, already reaching into his pocket. It was too little too late for the card to actually matter, considering you had already been hurt.

“Now you pull out a fucking card” Lindsey spat in his direction, shrugging off the yellow he held towards her. She rolled her eyes as she turned to where the medics were helping you sit up.

“Babe,” she said hesitantly, placing a hand on your back as the Medics decided you could walk off the field. Your face was stained red, and Lindsey couldn’t tell if it was from your nose or the gushing cut on your forehead.

“I guess we’re both sitting out?” You mumbled groggily and disappointed. The only reason why the Chaos Cup was remotely enjoyable was because you got to play footie.

“Let’s get you stitched up first before you try convincing Mark to let you play, alright?” She said rolling her eyes. She was going to kill Kelley for teaching you that real players didn’t come off the pitch.

The Medics helped you stand, and Lindsey supported you as you made the way towards the bench, Sophia coming in for you and Morgan coming in for Lindsey. Mark nodded as you passed him and walked (were carried) towards the first aid room. You were almost there, hobbling along when you froze. You turned to look at your girlfriend.

“Did I score?” You asked, excitement leaking into your tone. It would be worth it if your Hail Mary scored. Lindsey rolled her eyes. Hinkle had almost killed you, and she had almost killed Hinkle, and all you were worried about was your shot. She sent you a halfhearted nod.

“I wonder if Sonnett will post about it on the Pride Stan account?” You smiled wide. Emily was for sure going to post about how great of a shot you just made. The world didn’t know that the three of you were a thing, but they for sure knew that Emily loved to complement all your crazy goals, even if they were supposed to be standing the Courage tonight.

“You two trouble makers are going to be the death of me,” She grumbled, and you laughed.

“But you love us” you singsonged, and Lindsey’s cheeks lifted automatically.

“I do. I really, really do.”

#uswnt x reader #uswnt imagine #uswnt imagines #lindsey horan x reader #lindsey horan imagine

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meanstreetspodcasts · 4 years ago

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Diamond in the Rough

“I was sitting in my office shooting paper clips at a King size horse fly. It was a little sadistic but he was bigger than I was. Well, about the time I had him down on his knees begging for mercy, the door opened…”

There’s nothing in Dick Powell’s early career to suggest he was destined to play hard-boiled private eyes. Had his bosses at Warner Brothers had their way, he’d have stayed in the song-and-dance roles on which he built his career. But thanks to a gamble by a director, Powell kicked off a new chapter to his career and the result were some great radio shows, including one of the medium’s best - Richard Diamond, Private Detective.

Powell got his start in Hollywood in the 30s as a singer in Warner Brothers musicals, including 42nd Street, and On the Avenue. He was frequently cast in the role of a boyish crooner, even as he approached his 40s. Despite his success, Powell was eager to expand into other roles. His efforts were resisted by Warner Brothers, who wanted to keep Powell right where he was, even if he thought it was the wrong place to be. He pursued the lead role in Double Indemnity, but it ultimately went to another actor pegged in “nice guy” roles - Fred MacMurray.

But later in 1944, RKO and director Edward Dmytryk gave Powell the role he’d been waiting for - Raymond Chandler’s Philip Marlowe in Murder, My Sweet, the film adaptation of the Marlowe novel Farewell, My Lovely. The film was a success, and Powell received rave reviews for his performance. In a flash, he had shed the crooner image he’d been desperate to shake and he embarked on the next stage of his career.

Powell recreated his role as Marlowe on the June 11, 1945 Lux Radio Theater broadcast of Murder, My Sweet, and he starred as private detective Richard Rogue in Rogue’s Gallery from 1945 to 1946. While it was a fine series, it failed to stand out from the crowd of hard-boiled private eyes littering the airwaves in the postwar years. For his next radio effort, Powell wanted to “make something a little bit different of a standard vehicle.” He recorded an audition show as “the man with the action packed expense account,” Johnny Dollar, but he passed on the series for a show that sprang from the mind of Blake Edwards. Edwards would later create the outstanding police procedural The Line-Up for radio, develop Peter Gunn for television, and would become a celebrated writer and director of film arguably most famous for the Pink Panther film series with Peter Sellers.

Powell and his producer, Don Sharp, asked Edwards if he had any ideas for a vehicle for Powell. Edwards said he did (a lie), and went home to write what would become the pilot for Richard Diamond, Private Detective. In Edwards’ original script, Diamond was a former OSS agent; he would evolve into an ex-cop. One trait he would retain as the script evolved was that Diamond was as quick with a quip as he was with his fists. This played to Powell’s natural comedic strengths, and it helped to give the show a unique voice in the sea of detective programs from the era. Unlike other radio shamuses, Diamond would keep up a friendly relationship with his old colleagues on the force - Lt. Walt Levinson, his former partner; and the oafish Sgt. Otis Ludlum, the long-suffering butt of Diamond’s jokes. Diamond flirted with every skirt that came through his office door, but he only had eyes for his Park Avenue girlfriend, Helen Asher. Shows would often close at her apartment, where Diamond would sum up his case and (in a nod to Powell’s old career) Helen might coax him to do a little singing.

Richard Diamond, Private Detective premiered on NBC on April 24, 1949. Powell was supported by Virginia Gregg as Helen; Ed Begley as Levinson; and Wilms Herbert doing double duty as Sgt. Otis and as Helen’s butler, Francis. Joseph Kearns, Peggy Webber, Bill Johnstone, Jack Kruschen, and other West Coast actors filled out the cast. Later in the show’s run, Frances Robinson would take over the role of Helen, and Ted de Corsia, Arthur Q. Bryan (Elmer Fudd), and Alan Reed (Fred Flinstone) would rotate in and out as Levinson.

The show ran without a sponsor for the first year before being picked up by the Rexall Drug Company (“Good health to all from Rexall!”) in June 1950. In January 1951, the show switched networks and picked up Camel cigarettes as its new sponsor. The show took its final bow on June 27, 1952 (although repeats popped up in the summer of 1953). Powell pulled the plug on the show as he entered a third phase of his career as a successful director and producer.

It was in this capacity that Powell brought Richard Diamond to television in 1957 for a four-season run starring David Janssen in the title role, minus the crooning of the radio series. Janssen would later star as Dr. Richard Kimble on The Fugitive. The Diamond TV show is perhaps best known today for its character of Diamond’s secretary, Sam, who was only shown from the waist down to show off her legs. The first actress to furnish Sam’s legs was a young Mary Tyler Moore.

In honor of his anniversary, here are ten of my favorite Richard Diamond radio adventures. Sit back and enjoy some sleuthing and singing with Dick Powell and company in these sensational stories.

"The Lillian Baker Case" - This one is a good showcase for Diamond's girlfriend Helen Asher, who gets to take a rare role in the case of the week. At a department store, Helen witnesses an elderly woman shoplifting. It turns out she's a wealthy eccentric, and later that afternoon she dies - allegedly after leaping from her balcony. (9/3/49)

"The Jerome J. Jerome Case" - Joseph Kearns plays the titular eccentric character - a man who claims to be a millionaire, a genius inventor, and a private detective. He wants to partner with Diamond, but as soon as the gumshoe tries to dismiss him it turns out the kook may have information about an actual murder. (9/17/49)

"The Louis Spence Case" - An unusual, but very exciting, episode finds Diamond racing against time to save his old friend Lt. Walt Levinson. A deranged bomber has escaped from prison, and he's taken the lieutenant hostage. Unless the mayor jumps to his death from city hall within the hour, the bomber will blow the precinct - and Walt - to kingdom come. (3/5/50)

"The Statue of Kali" - It's Richard Diamond's version of The Maltese Falcon (complete with Paul Frees doing his best Sydney Greenstreet). An ivory statue is delivered to Diamond by a dying man, and it's being hunted by nefarious characters from all around the world. (4/5/50)

"The Martha Campbell Kidnap Case" - Diamond is hired to deliver the ransom when a wealthy woman is kidnapped, but both he and the lady's nephew are knocked out, the ransom money is taken, and the kidnap victim is killed. Rick has to use some creativity and theatricality to figure out what happened. (7/26/50)

"The Oklahoma Cowboy Murder Case" - Diamond trades the bright lights of the big city for the clear skies of the plains in this episode that was later adapted as an episode of Peter Gunn. Rick heads west to investigate a suspicious death - a wealthy rancher who expired when he fell from his horse. (9/27/50)

"The Cover-Up Murders" - Rick and Walt partner again when a serial killer stalks the city. Part of his MO is to call the police and boast that he'll kill someone that night at eight o'clock. But what appears to be random madness may have a clear motive, and it's up to Diamond to stop the killings before more bodies drop. (11/22/50)

"Blue Serge Suit" - Jim Backus (later Mr. Howell on Gilligan's Island) is Diamond's new client - a tailor whose supply of blue serge is raided and stolen by intruders. When Diamond's own suit is snatched, he's on the trail of a gang of spies. (2/9/51)

"Lady in Distress" - A beautiful woman hires Diamond, and then she drops dead in his office. With nothing to go on - he didn't even know her name - Rick takes the case and tries to learn what had her so scared and what led to her death. It's a story that was recycled quite a few times. Jeff Regan and Johnny Dollar both solved variations of this script, but the Richard Diamond version is my favorite. (2/23/51)

"The Red Rose" - In another story later reworked as a TV episode of Peter Gunn, Diamond is hired to keep a client alive. The man hired a hit man to do away with himself, but he's had a change of heart. Unfortunately, the hit man is a committed professional and he intends to finish the job. (3/2/51)

Check out this episode!

#old time radio #golden age of radio

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justcourttee · 5 years ago

Text

I Won’t Try Again-Pt 32

Marinette was fighting for her life, the vine creatures swamping her, wave after wave.

“C’mon Beloved, we can make it out. Just push a little further.”

She couldn’t see the man but at the sound of his voice, she felt herself surge with strength. Row and row of the vines fell until she was standing knee deep in their bodies.

“Well down Marinette. I believe this calls for a celebration.”

Turning, she came face to face with a handsome man, his green eyes glistening with pride as he cupped her cheek, pulling her forward. Their lips were a centimeter away when a piercing pain knocked her backwards. Tears formed, sitting at the edge of her lashes as she looked down to find a vine sticking through her chest. Her eyes traveled back to meet the man’s, but he was nowhere to be found.

“Hold on shortie, Don’t die on me now.”

A dark haired woman appeared, helping the girl lower herself to the ground. Marinette tried to ask her what was happening, but it was as if someone had stolen her voice, only whimpers of pain escaped her mouth.

“Marinette. Marinette! No, no, no, please don’t go.”

She felt the warmth as the woman pulled her into her lap, her tears hitting Marinette’s forehead. Fear coursed through the girl as she felt the life slowly draining from her.

“I don’t want to die.” It pained her to talk, but it seemed to be the only thing she could say.

“Beloved, it’s too late. Just let go.” The man appeared once more, offering his hand to the woman, pulling her from the ground and into a hug. They both turned away, leaving the girl alone in a pile of vines.

“I don’t want to die. I don’t want to die. I don’t want to die.”

“Honey, please wake up. You’re scaring me.”

Marinette darted awake, gripping her chest, a sob tearing through her room.

“Oh, baby. It’s just a dream, you’re okay.”

Sabine gathered the girl’s shaking frame into her arms, allowing her tears to soak her night gown.

“It felt so real Maman. I thought I was gonna die.”

Sabine stroked her daughter’s hair, trying her best to get the girl to calm down. After she had revealed her double life, the woman was always sure to stay on alert for these night terrors. Marinette’s phone buzzed softly on her pillow, causing the girl to pull away to reach for it. Looking at the time, she frowned, putting the phone to her ear.

“Alya?” Her voice was still shaky from the dream, but it began to fill with worry. It was three in the morning, something had to be terribly wrong.

“Marinette?” The tears were obvious in the girl’s voice, Marinette could hear Alya choking back her own tears as she waited for an answer.

“Are you okay Alya?”

“It’s really you, oh god, Mari-” She cut herself off again, her crying becoming louder and choppier.

“Alya, Are you at the apartment? I’m coming over right now.”

She shared a knowing look with her mother as she moved to climb down the ladder. Alya didn’t respond, her crying turned into sobs, so loud that it surprised Marinette that neither of the boys were woken. Slipping on her shoes, Marinette gently woke Tikki, opening her bag for the kwamii to fly into.

“I’m on my way, I’ll be there in 5.”

She didn’t hang up as she pulled her mom in a tight hug, promising to be home in time for dinner.

“Marinette, Honey?”

“Yes Maman?”

“Happy Birthday Baby”

Marinette flashed her a smile, blowing her a kiss from the doorframe.

. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .

In no time, she found herself in front of her best friend's apartment, unsure as whether to knock.

“Alya? You still there? I’m standing outside.”

She heard some shuffling from the other side of the door as her phone line went dead. Slowly the door creaked open, Alya’s red eyes peeking through the crack.

“Alya?”

The door flew open as the girl crashed into Marinette.

“It worked, oh my god, it worked. You’re here, you’re really here.”

Her tears soaked the girl’s shoulder, crushing her in a tight hug. Marinette tried to rub her back in a comforting manner, she was clearly wasted, it had to be the only explanation.

“Let’s go inside, okay?”

Alya nodded, loosening her grip. Marinette made sure to close the door, locking up, before turning back to face her friend. Silent tears still fell from her eyes, her smile borderline hysterical as she grabbed Marinette’s hand, pulling her onto the couch with her.

“You have no idea how happy I am to see you. I didn’t think it would work but here we are. It’s your birthday again.”

The designer shook her head, giving Alya’s hand a light squeeze.

“Alya, what are you talking about?”

The girl gave her a cautious look, pulling her knees into her chest.

“Marinette, I need you to keep an open mind here. When I told Nino, he brushed it off to only being a bad dream, but it’s more than that. It actually happened, I’m sure of it.”

It was Marinette’s turn to give the girl a cautious look as she nodded. With a deep sigh, Alya pushed her glasses up her nose, looking at the ground.

“You died Marinette. I saw the vine pierce your chest, I held your dead body, I watched the life drain from your eyes. You died.”

Her eyes began to water again as she choked on her sentence. Marinette opened her mouth, but Alya shook her head, swallowing hard before she continued.

“I know how it sounds, but it happened. Your birthday passed, you took a job in Gotham that I secretly applied for, you met your soulmate, Adrien met his, you became Lady Rouge and when we attended the Gala near the end of your six-week trial, a Gotham Rogue attacked and you sacrificed yourself to save your soulmate.”

Her breathing was slow and laboured as she tried to avoid breaking down again.

“Alya,” Marinette tried to keep her voice level, she really didn’t want to set the girl off again. “If all that happened, why don’t I remember it? How am I sitting in front of you?”

“Sass! The kwamii said it wasn’t sure how far back we’d get sent, just that you would be alive! They also said some of us would lose all recolation of the account, which is why Nino doesn’t believe me! I promise, ask Tikki!”

The kwamii flew from Marinette’s bag, a perplexed look on its face.

“Alya could be right Marinette. I feel like something is unbalanced, like the time stream was messed with. Something new was created, a second chance.”

“But that would mean, the universe would take someone else in place of me, to keep the balance?”

The kwamii shook its head, a thoughtful look passing it’s face.

“Not necessarily, not with Sass’ ability. There is always a balance to the universe, but Sass’ scale is not as large as mine or Plagg’s.”

A sick feeling settled over Marinette’s stomach. Her face slowly paleing as she replayed Alya’s words.

“I had a dream Alya, before you called. A man with dark hair and green eyes and there were vines, vines were everywhere.” Her voice dropped as it all connected. “A vine pierced my chest.”

Alya nodded, slowly uncurling herself to face her friend. She opened up her arms, allowing the small girl to fall into them. It was Alya’s turn to comfort her friend as her breathing began to accelerate to the near point of hyperventilating. Her blue eyes were wide, tears flowing down her cheeks. Panic rolled off of her in waves as she gripped Alya’s arm for support.

“Focus on your breathing Marinette, you can do this. Four seconds in, eight seconds out. Four seconds in, eight seconds out.”

Within twenty minutes, both girls sat in silence, no more tears left to cry. Marinette curled into Alya’s side, adjusting her head to look at the girl’s face.

“Is he nice?” Her voice was soft, almost hesitant as she waited for her friend to answer.

“He is very generous, he didn’t throw his money around, but used it in a subtle way to make you feel special.”

Marinette nodded, the green eyes from her dreams burned in the front of her mind.

“Tell me more.”

“He loved you so much, even if it took him forever to realize it. He wanted to help people, he’s a vigilante in Gotham. He was way too smart for his own good, but only came off as condescending when provoked. He-”

Marinette closed her eyes, making a mental list of everything Alay said. She met her soulmate and lost him in less than six weeks, it was a cruel joke.

“What’s his name?”

“Damian Wayne.”

Both girl’s returned to the silence, lost in their separate thoughts. After a while, they both settled into the comfort of each other, slowly drifting back to sleep, both wondering the same thing. What happens now? . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .

Marinette stared at her wrist, rereading her new phrase over and over again as she leaned against the bakery counter. Alya had told her what her original words were, even explained the misconception behind them. It seemed like a lost memory to Marinette as she stared at the beautiful script. With a sigh, she picked up the broom, continuing to sweep the bakery floor.

She had just finished when the door opened, the bell sounding through the empty store. Without turning around, Marinette placed the broom back into the closet.

“I’m sorry, but the bakery is closed.”

“You can’t make an exception for me Angel?”

Her whole back stiffened as she sucked in a sharp breath. Slowly she turned to face the man, his green eyes shining with humor.

“Damian?”

“You remember?” His smile broke her heart as he raced forward, only for her to step back. She held up a hand, stopping him in his tracks.

“Marinette?”

A single tear fell from her eyes as she internally cursed. This was the most she had cried in her whole life and it had only been one day. Concern washed over his face as he put his hands in his pockets, trying not to scare the girl.

“I remember parts. I remember my death, I remember a dark haired woman, I remember you holding me as I died. I-” she paused, trying not to choke on her words.”I remember I love you, but I don’t remember why or how I fell.”

He slowly nodded, his expression completely shattering her as he looked as broken as she felt. As if instinct, she moved forward to cup his cheek, pulling his face toward hers.

“But if I have a second chance, I don’t want to waste it. Help me remember, please.”

His eyes were so sharp, she didn’t remember the gold flakes in them, but the longer he stared at her, the more she noticed. Finally, his face melted into a small smile as he carefully lifted her hand to his lips, pressing a light kiss to them.

“When do you want to start?”

Her stomach flipped as she felt a smile begin to grow.

“Now would be great.”

He stepped back offering his arm to the girl.

“Then shall we Miss Marinette?”

Something tugged at the back of her head, like a sense of deja vu, but she ignored it, accepting his arm with a fake curtsy.

“We shall Mr. Wayne.”

The two left the bakery, strolling down the darkening Paris streets, neither saying much, just relishing the feeling of being together again.

Tag List:

@amayakans @maribat-is-lifeblood @throneoffirebreathingbitchqueen @moonlightstar64 @myazael @anonymously-odd @zebrabaker @crazylittlemunchkin @moonystars14 @worlds-tiniest-spook-pastry @mandy984 @mysupporthyperfixations @smolplantmum @cutechip @mochegato @messymessyml @emotionalsupportginger @jabalem @fusser90 @thequeenofpotatoeunicornss @fontegagrilledcheese @maybemanymuffins @jardimazul @clumsy-owl-4178 @alessialeone6997 @pheonixashtree @kuroko26 @bluefyoto94 @novicevoice @dontbenddontbreak @noirdots @vixen-uchiha @floralfi @dast218 @achefisachef @miraculous-simmer7 @mermaidreject @corabeth11 @spicybelladonna @loveswifi @the-fusionist @bee-wrecker @theg0ddesspersephone @sassakitty @not-annoying @tog84 @zestyzealot @queenmj10 @redscarlet95 @bigpicklebananatree @valeks-princess @kae690 @fatimaabbasrizvi @jessigurl-design @toodaloo-kangaroo @kking13 @miukiiu @tis-i-beanbandit @mochinek0 @lemurbox @queengeorgiaaa @damianette-is-life @constancetruggle @colorfulmongerpsychicranch

#daminette #maribat #try again

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dannifielding · 3 years ago

Text

Supernatural Snippet

This has been in my head for a thousand years, so I’ve finally started to write the whole scene down. It’s not finished, but thoughts would be nice :)

It’s from Season 12, Episode 22 (Who We Are)

The song is Make You Love Me by JT Music (Doki Doki Literature Club warning for the song)

This is a little more grusume than I tend to write, so it’s not the best, but I thought I would share it.

~0~0~0~

Amelia frowned slightly as she looked around the large, endless, white space she had found herself in. It had been many, many years since she had died, but she was sure this wasn’t her heaven. She was sure that she should have been on a hill just down the road from her old house with Dean, when they were both much younger, rocking out to Cheap Trick.

She reached up and touched the back of her head. She wasn’t sure how she felt about being killed by that bastard Ketch, but she went the same way her dad had died, so at least that was something. She would have to go find him. She missed him terribly.

“Hello.”

She spun around, startled by the voice that greeted her from behind. Just down then… well, the endless void, was herself. Well, not quite herself. Whatever it was had her face, and her voice, but her clothes were very plain and she was wearing a skirt that Amelia wouldn’t have even given a second thought about in a store. In fact, the whole outfit screamed librarian, or church mom, and she wasn’t sure how she felt about seeing herself in that context.

“Hello?” she replied, a little more unsurely than her counterpart.

“I imagine this is very strange for you,” the other Amelia started. “But you don’t have to be afraid. I’m here to help.”

“Help?” Amelia repeated. “I don’t know if you’ve noticed, but I’m dead.”

The other Amelia nodded in some form of fake sympathy. “That is very true, yes,” she agreed. “However, I can change that, if you like.” She placed a hand on her own chest. “I’m you, but a different you, a you that happened to go down a different path.”

“And that makes you want to help me?” Amelia asked and she nodded. “But why? What’s it to you if I live or die?”

“I could go into the intricacies of cross universal existence, but we really don’t have time for that,” the other Amelia replied. With a wave of her hand the void flickered and, next to them both, an image appeared. An image of Ketch approaching Dean, who was still strapped in to the machine, trying to save his mom. “If you let me help you, you can save his life.”

~0~0~0~

Dean blinked, disorientated like he had been rudely awaking from a dream before he was ready. The world was a little blurry as he felt the drying streaks of tears on his cheeks. The first thing he saw was his mother still in front of him, still asleep, with the nodes still stuck to her forehead. He woozily looked around, trying to get his bearings, when he saw the British bitch on the floor, her neck cut. He blinked again, his senses quickly coming back as he looked for the other blonde he wanted to see. Just next to Bevell was Amelia, a bullet wound in the middle of her forehead. Dean shook his head once.

“No,” he breathed, as his stomach turned and he was overwhelmed by the devastation he felt at the sight of her dead on the floor.

“Oh yes,” a deep, British voice replied smugly. He turned his head and saw Ketch hovering above him. It wasn’t hard to put the pieces together and all the anger that quickly built up inside burst forward and he lunged at Ketch, hands around his neck. Unfortunately, being both dazed and injured, it wasn’t hard for the British man to fight him off and he chucked him into some of the bookshelves. Dean cried out in pain and his leg hit the stone ground.

~0~0~0~

Amelia had woken up in the void with not much knowledge of her death except that she was shot in the head by Ketch, and she’d not had time to give it much thought. Seeing him attack Dean, and so easily, had her chest tightening painfully and she couldn’t help but take a step towards the image. “He’s going to kill him!” she exclaimed in panic as Dean slammed into the bookshelf.

“Oh, most definitely,” the other Amelia replied calmly. “I can stop that, though, if you let me.”

“How?” Amelia demanded. “What even are you? Angel, demon or other?”

“I’m you,” she said, trying to reassure her. “But I can still help. I can help you save him.”

Amelia looked at Dean again as Ketch approached him with the swagger of a man who knew he was going to win. Dean tried to get off the floor by using a chair for support, but Ketch easily took him down with a swift kick to the knee.

“For what price?” Amelia asked. “What do you want to help me save him?”

“Nothing.” Amelia snorted, looking at her in disbelief. “No, really. I just want you to know that I’m only here to help. That’s it. And when you’ve saved your…” she looked at the image. “Well, shall we stick with ‘friend’ for now, hmm? When you save him, I’ll be gone.”

“Until you need a favour, right?”

The other Amelia smiled. “Isn’t that how all favours go?” she replied. “What do you say? Do you want my help, or not?”

~0~0~0~

Dean didn’t think anything had hurt like his leg did at that moment. It burnt deeply, and right up and down it, like someone was tearing it apart with their bare hands. He could barely see a thing as his vision went white and he felt like he was going to throw up. He couldn’t, though. He didn’t have time to do anything about it. Bevell was dead, Amy was dead, and he was the only thing left standing between Ketch and his mother. He couldn’t save the other two – he couldn’t save her – but he’d be damned if he let Ketch take anyone else.

“Oh what?” Ketch said, slowly walking over to him, his voice dripping with derision. “Thought you’d get your mum back?” Dean hated the sound of his voice then more than he’d ever hated it before. “Sorry, Dean, that’s not how this ends. This ends with me ending you.”

He took a swipe at his leg, sending Dean to his knees and then punched him straight in the head to send him to the ground. Stars exploded in his head, but Dean just snarled up at him. “I want to kill you,” Dean told him through panting breaths.

“You won’t,” Ketch replied, fists up, obviously in a fighting stance he’d learnt back in Britain. “But I’d very much enjoy it if you try.”

Dean pulled back, ready to take the first swing, when the whole room was illuminated by a bright light that took both of them by surprise. As he blinked away the spots in his vision he turned his attention back to Ketch, who was stood, eyes wide, completely still.

“As soon as you stepped in the room, I heard your heart go Doki-Doki.”

He knew that voice anywhere, and he looked over at where Amy had been lying on the floor. Instead, now, she was stood up. Her arm was outstretched in front of her, proving that she was the source of Ketch’s sudden paralysis, but that had become very secondary in his head. She was stood, yes, but it was like someone was propping her up. Her head lolled forward, her eyes were closed, and her arms and legs hung like she wasn’t bearing any of her own weight.

“Amy?” he called to her unsurely.

“Now who are you going to choose? Baby, take my hand and I'll make you love me,” she continued.

I promise, I’ll make you love me.

His gaze shot up. It had been years since any kind of voices joined her when she sang, just the once with Chuck, but he still would recognise the noise instantly. This was not that. The voices were broken, mixed up, like they couldn’t work together. It was if she was struggling to get them to come together under her control.

Amelia giggled – a noise that he definitely wasn’t used to hearing from her – and he looked back at her to see her whole body jolt as if she had been let go. She stood straight, under her own strength once again and her eyes snapped open to show the white glow of angels that none of them could mistake.

He shook his head, flashbacks of when Cas had controlled her when he’d decided that he was the new God, when they’d all seen her massacre hundreds for the angel. “No,” he breathed again, as this seemed so much worse that her being dead.

With a wave of her hand, she sent Ketch flying into the wall. He crumpled to the ground and she ignored him, like he was an afterthought. She smiled at Dean but it felt fake. She started to step forward and he did his best to move over to his mother. He wasn’t sure what was going on, but he knew better than to leave Mary unguarded until Amelia was at the front again.

“I've heard all about you, I'm so glad to have met you. Can I be the one that you're gonna sit next to?” she sang. “Read my poem full of dreams and hopes. I know you hang with Sayori but I'll show you the ropes.”

She turned her attention to Mary, her head tilted like she was observing something adorable but uninteresting. “Under the surface, no one is perfect,” she continued, reaching out to cup Mary’s face. “So don't you ever let your feelings hide, my heart's an open book, come take a look inside.”

Mary, with a gasp, woke up with wide eyes, completely disorientated. Whatever Amy had done had pulled his mom straight out of her head, a feat they had all struggled with, but she acted like it wasn’t even worth considering. “I can’t get you out of my head,” she sang, reaching up to her own head. She stuck two fingers into her wound without even a wince, wiggling them around. “A voice tells me I’ve got no choice.” She pulled out the bullet and chucked it onto the floor. Her movements were becoming more and more fluid, more and more natural, but the glow in her eyes definitely said it wasn’t her. “I've read your destiny and I'm at the conclusion. Free will and agency are all but illusion, because.”

She turned to face him, meeting his eyes so he couldn’t look anywhere else. “You're the very air that I breathe, if you leave, you're taking it from me. I hate how much you're making me make you love me.” Her eyes flickered and the neutral look disappeared. She frowned, looking at him for answers as her eyes dimmed. “Is it real, what I'm feeling?”

Almost immediately, before he could respond, or help, she flickered back and straightened, smiling at him once again. “Don't mean to rush it but you're a part of me. I can't promise that I won't succumb to jealousy. Why do you keep running, honey? You gotta trust me.” She reached out and cupped his face. “You'll come to love how much I make you love me.”

He’d been so entranced by her, trying to work out if she was dead, or alive, or possessed, that he hadn’t noticed Ketch stand up and move towards them. The anger that appeared on her face said she did, though, and she turned and held her hand out. He froze in place again and it was obvious that he’d really pissed her off.

“Literature gives us no definitive answers, so, how do you interpret cryptic words in my stanzas?”

She walked towards him, letting him go with a wave of her hand. Dean quickly turned to Mary and helped rip the nodes of her forehead. “What’s happening?” she asked him but he shook his head.

“I think- I don’t know,” he stuttered. “I have an idea, and we need to move.” He all but pulled her out of her chair and she helped him hobble to the back of the room. It was like watching some sort of horror movie as Ketch seemed to have lost all of his confidence and was now preparing to fight for his life.

“You must embrace your depression,” Amelia continued, her voice dropping, the angels that sang with her also changing to something much more sinister than he’d ever heard them. She reached up to her own face, dragging her fingernails down it and leaving deep, bloody marks in their wake. “Because pain can create an impression.” She didn’t flinch as her blood dripped down and instead of wiping it away, she let it trail down like war paint. “To suffer is the artist's true catalyst.”

The greatest agony is simply to exist

The deep, broken, eery voice that sang out around her proved to Dean that whatever was possessing her wasn’t the angels that she’d controlled before. It had to be demons, because the sound of them alone felt evil, and wrong.

Ketch whipped his gun out, but she easily took it out of his hand with a flick of hers and it reached the stairs out of the bunker. “Now you can't get me out of your head,” she continued, approaching ever closing to him.

How you want me

“A voice saying you've got no choice.”

And you love me.

Ketch pulled out a knife and took a swipe at her. She caught it with her hand, the blade going through the middle. She pushed down until she could wrap her fingers around his grip and his eyes widened as she didn’t even flinch. She used his hand to pull him closer. “I've read your destiny and I'm at the conclusion. 'Cause your autonomy is nothing but a fucking illusion, because.”

She flung him away and he took the knife with him. He hit the briefing table with a thud and tumbled over it with a cry of pain. Amelia raised her hand again, the blood pouring out, and he was flung against the wall again.

“You're the very air that I breathe, if you leave, you're taking it from me. 'Cause you keep my heart beating. I hate how much you're making me make you love me.” She looked over at Dean again, the brightness dimming. “Is it real, what I'm feeling?”

She was still in there, wasn’t she? Something hadn’t taken over her corpse, she’d allowed them in. That meant that she wasn’t dead. “Amy!” he barked. “That’s enough! Kick them out!”

She looked, for a brief moment, like she agreed with him. But then the light was back and she tilted her head away. “Don't mean to rush it but you're a part of me,” she continued, like she was singing to herself. The grin on her face suggested that whatever was inside of her was trying to convince her against fighting. “I can't promise that I won't succumb to jealousy. Why do you keep running, honey? You gotta trust me. You'll come to love how much I make you love me.”

She turned her attention back to Ketch, who had decided that his best option was to retreat. He was heading to the staircase out, probably to get some better weapons to take down the Winchester family. Amelia, evidently, had other plans and she disappeared from in front of Dean and Mary and reappeared instantly in front of Ketch. Her grin grew more manic and she backed him up towards the wall.

“I am the personification of your sickest obsessions,” she told him, the voices around her mimicking her with a horrifically creepy tone. “I am the manifestation of your darkest fantasies.”

The man’s back hit the wall but she didn’t stop until was stood in front of him. “But you're not evil, you're human, you're an animal.” Her features to feral and the voices, again, dropped down to match the evil, unnatural growl that came from her. “Now love me…” She punched forward and shoved her hand into his chest, ripping out his heart. “Love you until you die.”

He dropped to the floor, dead, and she held the heart out in front of her like it was nothing at all. The voices around them all disappeared as she stared at the blood-splattered wall. “I'll make you love me,” she sang softly.

Nothing happened for a moment and Dean looked down at his mom, who he knew had absolutely no idea what was going on. Not like he did, to be perfectly honest, but at least he’d had some experience with her angels in the past.

Amy looked at her hand, where she held the heart, then at the wall again. “Did-Did I pull a bullet out of my head?” she asked softly, timidly and it jolted Dean.

“Amy?” he asked, surprised, as he quickly made his way over to her, stumbling slightly until he reached her side. He could see her eyes were already starting to flash.

“I think- I think,” she started, her head twitching to one side, her neck snapping painfully, like she was a glitching computer game character. “I think they’re leaving.”

“Make them heal you,” he commanded, desperately, as he looked her over. She was alive, but her injuries were so severe he wasn’t even sure how they could heal her on their own. “Now, Amy!”

She looked down at her other hand, where there was hole from the knife she had caught. Then she turned to Dean, looking down at his broken leg. The hand started to glow but then she pressed it against him. He cried out in pain for a moment, before the familiar feeling of the absence of pain filled him as he realised that she’d healed him instead. The light finally faded from her eyes and she rocked on the spot.

“Can I- Can I drop the heart?” she asked meekly before she fell against him. Mary helped hold her up and Dean wondered when she’d come over – he hadn’t noticed.

“Let it go,” Mary encouraged gently and she did. They all ignored the splatter as it hit the ground. “We need to move her to the table,” she instructed her son. She knew the look of panic on his face and knew that someone needed to take charge. He took her instructions gladly and helped her over to the briefing table, where they sat her down. She was shaking violently and Dean sat next to her, her less damaged hand in his. She didn’t hold it back, but he just knew if he removed it she was grasp it back tightly with all the strength she had.

She was an absolute mess, with blood still dripping down her face from the scratches as well as the wound from the bullet hole. It was a miracle that whatever had possessed her had healed her up to some degree. Even now the knife wound looked painful and gruesome, but not as bad as when the knife was first torn through it.

“Dean!” his mother barked and he quickly snapped out of his thoughts as he realised that she had been calling his name a few times. “Go get the first aid kit,” she instructed. As the one who was normally in charge, he was glad for a moment where Mary had taken in the role.

As he suspected, the moment he stood up Amy’s hand tightened around his, even if she did nothing else but stare at the briefing table with barely any focus on anything. “I’ll be right back,” he promised her. “Mom will take care of you, alright?”

It took another moment but her grip loosened and he quickly rushed off to the infirmary to grab whatever he thought they would need to fix her up.

#amelia #snippet #make you love me

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cultofbeatles · 5 years ago

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beginners guide to the beatles

made one of these a long time ago but i'm surprised by how short it was. so here we go again. doing it right this time lol.

pov: you told a bad joke and now the beatles are judging you.

john winston lennon. later in his life known as john winston ono lennon.

born on october 9, 1940

i believe in astrology bc how does john just happen to be a libra

when john was four he started living with his aunt mimi who acted more as his mother figure

his mother, julia, remarried and would visit him quite a bit.

it was julia who taught john how to play banjo and piano. and she bought his first guitar.

they both had a deep love for music and rock n roll

he never really thought of her as his mother but more as a cool friend i suppose

aunt mimi was more rough on him and did the disciplining

his father was never really present growing up and his uncle passed away when he was young

he thought he was a curse for the men in his family

he had five half siblings. two of them, julia and jacqueline, he was pretty close to. the other three he barely knew.

fashion icon.

hated school but loved art

very early on he was insecure with himself

teachers always shit on him and said he would go nowhere in life

he met paul at a church fete on july 6, 1957

paul taught him how to play guitar properly.

once told paul that he didnt know how paul carried on after his mother died bc he just didn't think he could do it

john’s mother died from being hit by an off duty policemen. john was seventeen at the time.

he took her death really hard and became a bit of a recluse.

first serious relationship was with cynthia (we stan her)

once cynthia cut her hair short and he didn't talk to her for two days.

hate men. kill all men.

when he asked her to dance at a party she turned him down saying that she was engaged, and so he said “well i didn't ask you to fucking marry me, did i?”

slapped her once bc he was drunk and another boy was talking to her.

only time her hit her.

read cynthia’s books about john pls. i beg.

once a psychic told him that he would be shot in the states.

founder of the beatles and also came up with the name.

instruments he could play: guitar, harmonica, rhythm guitar, banjo, keyboard, piano, saxophone, bass guitar, and a little drums.

main songwriter in the beatles along with paul.

was more open minded to change in the beatles music.

was insecure in his relationship with paul after a while bc he thought he only needed him for songwriting.

would bitch about paul all day long but the second anyone else said something about him he’d be on their ass.

had a lot of issues and needed a good hug.

suffered from eating disorders, drug addictions, depression, insecurities, and questioned his sexuality bc of the time.

was super open minded and ahead of his time in many instances.

once he was called “the fat beatle” and after that he stopped eating as much.

truly loved his first son, julian lennon, and would buy him presents all the time bc he was excited to see him play with them.

“your famous ex husband”

he enjoyed playing monopoly.

he once claimed that he saw a ufo.

he had written three books but he always wanted to write a children's book.

the last song he ever performed in front of a live audience was “i saw her standing there.” with elton john.

he was afraid of the dark.

found out later in his life that he was dyslexic.

was also legally blind without glasses.

never could catch a break huh.

said that his best lyric ever was “all you need is love” i agree.

the first time yoko and john met was not at her art exhibit but actually when she approached him about giving away songs for free.

wanted to write a musical with paul.

once a friend dared him to masturbate ten times in one day and he managed to do it nine times.

would hold circle jerks with paul and a few other friends.

just dudes being dudes.

went on a holiday with brian epstein, who was gay, and told some people afterward that they did certain sexual things. but we will never know for sure.

yoko says that john was bisexual.

once in an interview he said that he would of married a rich man or woman if he wasn't in the beatles.

hated his voice on records. would always ask for effects on his voice for final recordings.

made a film with yoko where it was just his penis going from flaccid to erect for fifteen minutes in slow motion.

only beatle not to of become a vegetarian while he was alive.

murdered on december 8, 1980.

gave his autograph earlier in the day to the man who would murder him.

died at the age of 40.

“all my loving” was played while he was at the hospital.

and its spooky bc a lot of times in interviews he would say “when i'm 40..”

and it’s sad bc he was finally becoming who he truly wanted to be.

honorable john moments that i love:

“thanks for the purpler hearts” he says while receiving the silver heart

“you are the first person from liverpool that i've ever seen” “great”

eric lennon on my mind today

this come together performance where he messed up the lyrics lol

that interview where paul was sick and john keep checking on him

john lennon speaking nothing but facts

when he said that he could see the beatles going separate ways but that they'd always come back together.

SHUT UP

“shut up while he’s talking..”

this interview breaks my heart sometimes

and this interview is great as well

sir james paul mccartney

born on june 18, 1942

if you ever have spare time just check out this man’s natal chart.

idk how he’s still alive with his chart tbh.

he has a younger brother named mike and a step sister named ruth.

his dad thought he was the ugliest baby he’d ever seen when he was born.

when he was young paul would kill frogs in a way to prepare himself for the war if he ever was drafted.

the first instrument he ever learned to play was the trumpet.

I don't even want to list every instrument this man can play but trust me when I say it’s a lot.

but for the beatles he mainly did bass, vocals, and piano. sometimes playing the guitar and the drums.

the beatles was just paul moving really, really fast.

he lost his mother when he was 14 due to surgery for breast cancer.

never really learned how to cope well with loss of a loved one tbh.

had the cutest chubby cheeks as a kid tbh

met john and was accepted into his band

sometimes they'd ditch school together and either work on music or would visit art galleries.

went to paris with john and john bought him all the banana milkshakes that he wanted.

connected over their love and admiration for music, and bc they had both lost their mothers.

had a girlfriend’s mom who he would make comb his leg hairs.

was an ass to his first girlfriend.

kill all men again.

almost had to marry his girlfriend dot bc she was pregnant, but she ended up losing the baby.

was the one who introduced george harrison to john.

practically despised pete best and stuart stutcliffe bc they were bringing the group down.

got arrested along with pete best bc they lit a condom on fire in hamburg.

still felt awful and a little guilty when stuart died suddenly.

main force behind the beatles imo.

without him we’d have not as much beatles music as we do.

was dating jane asher throughout majority of the sixties.

when they first met they talked about syrup and paul fell in love.

they broke things off after she walked in on him sleeping with another woman though.

directed magical mystery tour and it was amazing and I don't care what anyone says ok?

when john divorced cynthia he was the only one not scared of john and went against his wishes of not speaking to cynthia.

was a little controlling at times.

has a good heart though.

mal evans had to drive him home once after a beatles sessions bc he was crying so hard.

was talking about getting the band back to touring when john said he was leaving the group.

everyone kind of turned against him when the beatles were breaking up and i hate it.

he just wanted what was best for the band.

married linda and had a nice little farm.

we love that story.

linda i'm free thursday if you want to hang out pls.

started up the whole “no meat monday” thing where you don't eat monday on mondays

food meat. not the other kind of meat.

children: james mccartney, stella mccartney, heather mccartney, mary mccartney, and beatrice mccartney.

rip martha.

WINGS!!

he lost linda in 1998 due to cancer.

cried for a whole year bc of it.

still has dreams about john and says they're nice.

wrote a sad song about john called “here today.”

really loved john. like..he truly, genuinely did.

want someone to love me like paul does john.

“think of me every now and then old friend.”

honorable paul moments:

his story about george’s dad

“john? he was beautiful. very beautiful.”

humpty dumpty rap

another story about him and george.

his google search video that I watch every week

this

george harrison

born: February 24, 1943

or at least we think

bc he use to say that his birthday was february 25, but later started saying it february 24.

why can't we change our birthdays its not like we picked it

he was the youngest child.

baby of the family and of the beatles awwww

two older brothers named harry and peter. one older sister named louise.

when george’s mom was pregnant with him she’d play sitar music.

his mom was super supportive of his career choice

when he was 16 he worked as an electricians apprentice.

his dad kind of hoped he would start a family business out of it.

george said nah

would ride the bus opposite way of his house just to spend time with paul

headbutted a kid bc he didn't think they were worthy of paul’s friendship

was brought into the band bc of paul insisting to john

would follow john around like a lost puppy when he first met him

once had an eight hour erection. don't ask me how idk he said it.

was 17 when he lost his virginity and the other band members were in the room watching and cheered him when he finished

most sex craved beatle tbh

once walked into a girls dressing room and asked if they could stand there so he could masturbate

he was the first beatle to go to america

got a black eye for defending ringo once

would make john and paul take turns sharing rooms with ringo when he first joined the band so that he felt more welcomed

when ringo left during the white album and then came back george decorated the studio with flowers for him

during the beatles first recording session he told george martin that he didn't like his tie

became a vegetarian at 22

favorite candy was jelly beans and purple was his favorite color

used the phrase “grotty” in the hard days night movie, hated it, but everyone else picked up on the slang

met his first wife, pattie boyd, on the set of a hard days night

was turned down by her at first

they married in 1966

wouldn't let her do modeling stuff and was kind of an ass

a stylish couple but not the best image for a healthy relationship

got into eastern religion around 1965

during the Hamburg days he would eat chicken on stage

had an affair with ringo’s first wife maureen

got a divorce from pattie in 1977

in 1978 he married olivia who he stayed with until his death and had one son with. dhani.

was the first beatle to hit a number one single and album.

was buddies with led zeppelin

inspired their “rain song”

smashed a piece of cake on john bonham’s head and then was thrown into the pool by him

he financed and produced films. had a production company.

tom petty said that george never shut up once you started talking to him

but he was often referred to as “the quiet beatle”

formed another band called the traveling wilburys

he’d answer questions online in the 2000′s and it’s the cutest thing ever and his answers break my heart too.

“what do you miss most about john lennon?” “john lennon.”

in 1999 a schizophrenic person broke into his house and stabbed him 40 times

thank god olivia was there bc she was the only braincell in the room

had to get a part of his lung taken out

died november 29, 2001 from lung cancer

ashes were scattered into the ganges river

honorable george moments:

this interview he did with ringo

“i'm sad bc i can't play guitars with john anymore. but i did that...i know we’ll meet again some day.”

when he invented reaction videos

“the wind was blowing.” “..blowing my girl?”

“what kind of girl do you like?” “john’s wife.”

sir richard starkey aka ringo starr

born on july 7, 1940

oldest member in the group

has no siblings

naturally was left handed but his grandma thought it was bad luck so he writes right handed, and plays drums with a right handed kit

but does everything else left handed

when he was 6 he fell into a two month coma

was a very sick child

when he was 13 he was in the hosiptal for tuberculosis and formed a hospital band

grew up poor

loves and looked up to his stepfather a lot

his step father bought him his first drum kit in 1957

wasn't that great in school bc he missed so much of it from being so sick

he worked for a britain railway for a while

also served drinks on a day boat for a job

loves dancing

Rory storm and the hurricanes

got his nickname from all the rings he would wear

replaced pete best as the beatles drummer

dealt with people hating him for a bit bc they liked pete more

had to style his hair in a bowl cut to be in the band and i'm still mad at them for making him do that shit

ringo i'm so sorry

george martin didn't really like his drumming and had a session drummer come in for the first album

in 1964 he had tonsillitis, pharyngitis, and high fever all at once and had to be in the hospital for a bit.

was worried the beatles would replace him for good

he’s a cancer don't worry

was the first beatle to try weed

drummers always go first huh

married his first wife, maureen, in 1965

she kissed paul, ringo, and george.

what a champ

honeymoon was ruined by reporters

was really insecure in his relationship and needed a lot of reassurance

had a great relationship with pretty much all the beatles

but a great one with john

john felt his most relaxed when he was with ringo

was once in a movie with roger daltrey

divorced maureen in 1975

his wife now is barbara bach who he married in 1981

had alcohol problems

once gotten so drunk that he beat barbara so badly that he thought he killed her

put himself into rehab after that

barbara lowkey looks like jan from the office

children: zak, lee, and jason

zak is the drummer for the band the who

peace and love

but don't send me fan mail anymore

peace and love

ringo starr and the allstar band (starting 1981)

was the narrator for thomas the tank engine

will play at paul’s concerts sometimes now for fun

mad bc he came on stage during paul’s last concert show and it was on my birthday and I couldn't go to it

honorable ringo moments:

“do you want me to come with you?”

stupid barbara walters

talking about paul

giving us a little dance

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professionalfangirl24601 · 3 years ago

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Tight-Knit Family

Aftg Falsettos AU, in which Wymack is Marvin, Stuart is Whizzer, Abby is Trina, Betsy is Mendel, Kevin is Jason and Andreil are the lesbians from next door.

Betsy adopted Andrew when he was seven. Then after finding out about Aaron and Nicky she adopted them too.

Nathan killed Mary when she tried running away with Neil. Stuart is a very successful businessman who killed Nathan and adopted Neil. The Moriyamas give permission to Stuart in exchange for him helping them for the next ten years.

Stuart does that from England, but after a while they need him in the US. He brings Neil with him since Neil's still a minor and Stuart's his legal guardian and they stay in Millport, Arizona. Neil goes to school there for a year.

Kayleigh went to Wymack with Kevin one day and told him that Kevin was his son. Then she disappeared and no one heard from her ever again. Wymack married Abby because he thought Kevin needed a mom.

Kevin recruits Neil the same way and he agrees right away. They haven't met before and Neil isn't on the run. He's always loved Exy. The reason he didn't resist going to the US was because of Exy.

It's Neil's second year of college, and everything goes more or less the same way, except Andrew never drugs Neil. There's nothing suspicious about him. He doesn't look at Kevin weirdly, doesn't have a large amount of money in his binder or pictures and articles of Kevin and Riko. He owns a normal amount of clothes and stuff.

The fic starts with Wymack and Abby sitting Kevin down and telling him about the divorce. Abby is bisexual and she has internalized homophobia. She says some homophobic things and they tell Kevin that he'll meet Wymack's boyfriend soon.

Kevin is very dramatic about it. He goes to his dorm and rants to Andrew and Neil about it. He's aroace and doesn't understand why people do stupid things, like breaking a perfectly "happy" family, because of love. He's kinda homophobic too like he believes Wymack was straight and whoever his boyfriend is "turned him gay".

His audience isn't impressed, though. Neil knows about Wymack and Stuart and says that Kevin shouldn't say those things, before meeting the boyfriend. Also, he tells him from experience that if there was no love between Abby and Wymack it was better for everyone that they separated.

Andrew says that you can't "turn" people gay. Also, Andrew and Neil are already together at this point, so they're really the worst possible people for Kevin to vent about it.

Kevin meets Stuart the next day and when he realizes it's Neil's uncle, he gets mad at Neil too. He expects Andrew to support him, but he takes Neil's side. He even refuses to give Kevin a ride to the court, let alone play with him to work through his anger.

Wymack goes to Betsy for therapy. He suggests to Abby that she go too since she's (understandably) very upset about the whole situation. Abby goes and she and Betsy hit it off right away.

Betsy is a terrible therapist. Worse than she's in the books. She's based on Mendel, after all. Abby doesn't notice that, though. So after she finds Kevin playing Exy by himself, she tries very hard to convince Kevin to see Betsy too. Kevin agrees only if Betsy goes to the court.

She goes and Kevin is like 'finally here's someone who'll understand me.' He finds out how wrong he was shortly after. Kevin says how he hates everyone, including Andrew. Betsy tells him that Andrew's her son. Then he says some homophobic things and Betsy's like 'I'm lesbian.' It's very awkward.

Kevin tries to find Kayleigh, but Andrew finds out and tells him that if she abandoned him she doesn't deserve to be his mother.

Kevin's therapy sessions continue because Abby forces him to go.

Abby and Betsy fall in love and decide to get married. Wymack gets angry because they're his therapist and ex-wife. Andrew threatens Abby that if she doesn't treat his mother how she deserves, he'll kill her. Betsy's there too and she laughs it off. She says something like 'they're crazy when they're teens, huh?" Abby says "isn't he 20?" and Betsy laughs like it's a joke.

Wymack overhears it and tells Andrew that he can't threaten Abby with death. Andrew replies that it's above his pay grade because Abby's nothing to him anymore. That hits Wymack hard.

Then the winter banquet arrives and Riko tells Wymack about Stuart's real work. Wymack breaks up with him, because a) Stuart's a danger to his team, and b) he feels like he can't trust Stuart anymore like he doesn't know who Stuart is anymore.

Stuart says that his debt will be paid by the summer. But doesn't mention why it exists in the first place. He goes back to England and takes Neil with him. Before they go Neil tells him about how Stuart got involved with the Moriyamas in the first place. Neil also says that Stuart is more helpful than dangerous when it comes to the Moriyamas. When Riko tried to get him on his team, Stuart made him back off.

Wymack starts to regret breaking up with him, but he doesn't have the time to think about it and lets Stuart go.

Kevin notices how similar Andrew and Wymack's behaviors are when their boyfriends are away. He understands that even though he doesn't feel romantic attraction, he still loves his family and friends. And if romance is what makes them happy, he'll do anything he can to bring it back to them.

So Kevin teams up with Neil and they create a plan. They decide that if Neil convinces Stuart to come with him to the US, Kevin will take it from there and get them back together.

It turns out, Kevin doesn't have to work as hard for that to happen as he imagined. He sneaks Stuart where Wymack is, as though he can see Neil playing Exy better. They don't need any more meddling and get back together.

Betsy starts working as a team therapist. Wymack's not too happy about that at first, but then he sees how much she helps with the Foxes, and starts respecting her for that.

Months pass by and their relationships gradually get better. They play the final game against the Ravens. Kevin and Riko didn't know each other until they were already in college and they're just rivals. Kevin is a better striker than Kevin and he's jealous of him. He can't do anything about it, though. Jean plays for the Trojans from the start.

The Foxes win, of course. When Wymack, Abby, Betsy, and Stuart are celebrating with them in the locker room, Riko somehow gets in there. He says something insulting about them, and Kevin stands up to him and defends his family.

#another long post about aftg musical au?#shocking I know #at first i really wanted to name it Unlikely Lovers because *gestures at the ships*#but the story's not about the couples #It's more Kevin centric and the focus is on family instead of romantic love #I don't really ship Wymack/Stuart and Betsy/Abby #but I couldn't imagine andreil in that situation #it's still ooc for wymack abby stuart and betsy but in a more fun way #i mean it doesn't make me cringe #betsy being a therapist like mendel gives me life #like in real life i'd hate it #but in fiction it's funny #and yeah she's not very good but she's what the Foxes need #like in the books #I wish i could write it but I don't have time :(#aftg #aftg fic idea #aftg au #falsettos

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bathroombreaks · 4 years ago

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gg 1x01 rewatch

the questions are from @pynkhues, you can find them here.

1. What was your favourite scene of the episode? Tell us why!

oooh it’s def the scene where the girls are getting ready to rob fine & frugal. i just find it hilarious that they’re about to rob a store and they’re talking about how their kids are doing in school?? like, what absolute lunatics!! and i think it sets up their dynamic very well right from the beginning, idk. everyone’s always saying that the three girls have a very lived-in chemistry and i agree and i think you can feel it right from this first scene of them together

2. Was there any scene that missed the mark for you? And if so, how?

idk?? i’m very bad at reading and watching things critically, i’m very easy to please, i think?? and this ep just makes me pleased as punch!! but i guess that the scene with beth and amber, while funny, doesn’t really hit the mark for me?? idk, the way she’s framed as a “beautiful dummy” and not as much at fault as dean kind of irks me. i totally get that dean is the married one, but amber clearly knew he was married and somewhat regularly saw his wife, i don’t think she should really be absolved of that. and, idk, i don’t like that she basically got a prize for cheating - like, “here, you helped my husband cheat on me, so take some money to go live your dreams” is such a weird response?? beth was very scathing in the delivery and i get the point was for amber to be out of their lives but, like, still?? why not just tell dean he has to fire her?? this just further proves that beth is an idiot and an absolute lunatic, which we already knew

3. Let’s talk about the Big 6 Character Intros – Beth, Ruby, Annie, Dean, Stan, Rio. What did you think? What did you like? What did you dislike?

oooh i really liked all of them!!!

i absolutely love annie’s, it’s so fun with the car speeding and then with her banter with ben. i love the way they set up their dynamic right from the get go!!

and then ruby and stan’s intro was also amazing!! you get right away that they love each other so much and are so supportive of each other!! the way they both gesture when sara is talking about the women standing next to the men is so cute!!! i love it!!

rio’s is also amazing, he’s a snarky little bitch right from the get go and they really did a great job of also surprising us, thanks to the camera angle, and really driving home that he’s the boss.

i think the one i liked the least is actually beth and dean’s?? i mean, they do a good job of immediately letting you know that beth is the overworked mother and dean is the lazy, good-for-nothing husband - i mean, she’s running around, taking care of everything, and then he just strolls in and asks the kids to go to the car, without even having his tie done. but i think it’s a little misleading and i think it’s one of the reasons why the fandom (including myself) maybe has a harder time accepting beth staying with dean (aside from the fact that dean is a fucking asshole and he deserves nothing less than a horrible death, i mean)?? it really sticks in your mind this contempt she seems to have for him?? and, of course, then you get the flashback to beth getting waxed for him, and so you understand that they were maybe going through a bit of a rough patch but she wanted to work through it, but what sticks in your mind is that first scene, where she’s full of contempt, not even able of saying a perfunctory i love you back. and since they seem to want to drag out the boland marriage as much as possible, i think they kind of failed there.

4. Ruby tells Stan to fix the damn door! Is Stan an amazing handyman? A terrible one???

i think stan is anywhere from ok to amazing, they’re just so overworked that he hasn’t had time?? idk, paired with the fact that he says he’s pulling a double at the beginning of the ep and that it doesn’t seem to be a new or uncommon thing, it just reads to me like a thing he really does want to take care of at some point but hasn’t found the time to do yet

5. Do you think Beth, Ruby or Annie had a way out of their individual financial situations that didn’t involve crime?

in short: nope. in long:

ruby and stan are desperate. they mention stan’s parents at some point, but i assume they just don’t have the money to help them?? and, i mean, they’re both working double shifts and they mention that they’ve had their gofundme page up for years. i think if they had any other way they absolutely would’ve already taken it, for sara’s sake.

we can assume from the flashbacks we get in 2x08 that annie and beth didn’t have as stable a home life as all that. i assume that either their parents are both now dead or they just have no communication with them. either way, they don’t have them as a safety net.

when it comes to annie, she’s working a minimum wage job, driving a very shitty car and her kid’s laptop has been broken for a month without her being notified, because said kid knows they don’t have the money to get a knew one. she does ask for help from the richest person the girls know later (that’s how i think they phrased?? i’m pretty sure), her ex, who promptly says no. so, yeah, it’s safe to say she doesn’t have a way out of her financial situation either.

and, in regards to beth, i think she would absolutely help ruby (and annie) if she could. so the fact that she doesn’t, paired with the fact that we get mentions later that this is not the first time dean has managed to basically bankrupt the car dealership, makes me assume that either the bolands were living close to paycheck to paycheck, but stable enough that she didn’t worry, or that she did think they had some spare money and did give that to them when she could?? because i don’t see how she would not give ruby the money for sara, if she thought she had it, especially when she does it later in the season.

so, no, i don’t really think any of the girls had safety nets or ways to get out of their financial situation. except for beth. she could’ve gotten a job. i know it would’ve been hard because of her lack of work experience, but she could’ve at least tried instead of immediately jumping to robbery!!

6. Is Beth’s backsplash dope? Or was Rio just being a dick??

both!! i mean, i personally like the backsplash, but rio was absolutely just being an asshole, whether or not he did believe it was dope had nothing to do with it.

7. Five major story locations were set up this episode – Ruby’s house, Beth’s house, Annie’s apartment, as well as Fine & Frugal and Boland Motors. Was there anything that jumped out for you about these locations in this episode? Do you think that they were well established given what happens in each across the course of the series?

ok so i don’t know enough about like tv shows and storylines and all that stuff to answer this, i’m sorry. but, like, i think it’s very cool that fine & frugal is robbed in the first and last episodes of season 1, it’s a fun full-circle type of thing, and i love that we’re introduced to boland motors via dean’s affair and beth’s destruction of it because it’s something that permeates the place throughout the whole time?? i mean, beth later “borrows“ one of the cars, rio smashes the corvette because of beth, it gets raided by the fbi because of beth’s illegal activities - beth is always destroying it, even when she’s not literally destroying something like in that first episode. and in season 2 we have beth fully realising just how deep dean’s betrayal was in the middle of the boland motors showroom. both of those things are always there!! it’s cool. and saying that, i mean, they kind of went the same route with boland bubbles, if you think about it?? we get dean cheating on her there, her fully realising how deep his betrayal is via gayle’s comments and then her clearly robbing the place?? boland bubbles really is just a continuation of boland motors

8. We met lots of supporting characters this episode too – in particular Boomer, Baby Tyler, Amber and Greg. Based off of what we saw of them in this episode, pick one, and tell us what you think!

i love baby tyler and amber!! i love that we’re introduced to baby tyler being all smiley and y’know a little bit ridiculous eating ice cream while on the job and maybe obviously inept because of it. and maybe you expect him to not do anything during the robbery because of that but then he really tries?? he thinks he’s facing off with 3 armed criminals and he really goes for it, he doesn’t cower like boomer!! he’s adorable!! and amber i already talked about and i know i was a bit harsh but i really do love her!! her oblivious comments are gold.

9. Screenshot and/or tell us about your favourite character look~ this episode.

frankly, this ep doesn’t really have any stand out looks for me?? the one exception is annie’s outfit when she picks up ben in the porsche. you can really tell how happy she is that she could one up nancy, that she’s proud of herself because she’s gonna get to give ben the laptop he needs.

10. This episode gives us some sharp character notes on Beth, Ruby and Annie – from Beth’s capacity for violence to Ruby’s visceral anger around being ignored, particularly when it comes to her daughter’s wellbeing, to Annie’s tendency to run a mile when given an inch. Is there a moment that stood out to you, particularly in light of future seasons?

ohhh i mean, there’s something to be said about beth’s capacity for violence uh? she keeps refusing to acknowledge it, because that doesn’t fit her stepford wife without a pulse image as annie calls it, but it’s always there - she’s always ready to blow up and throw some keys at your face. and ruby’s response to being ignored kind of screws her over?? she was very lucky jt only wanted her address for his nephew and didn’t become a second mary pat. idk, i’m sorry. like i said, not very good at critical thinking.

#stfu #txt #ggrewatch2020 #gg #nbc good girls #good girls nbc #omg this took me so long to write!!#also i didn't really understand the speed round which is why i ignored it.#when i see how other people do it i'll start doing it too

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rosesnink · 5 years ago

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The Viscountess, Prologue

A/N: I have been writing this for a while, the idea in my head. I really like the idea of such a theme that is so common and yet so unseen and poorly explored I just KNOW I had to write about this. More info below.

Book: Desire and Decorum, single mom AU

Pairing: Ernest Sinclaire x Nicole Donovan (MC)

Summary: Nicole finds herself a young widow with a young daughter and must start over after her husband’s death. New school, new job, new life. It’s hard without her dear husband, but her little Anne is worth it.

The night Alaric Donovan died, everything fell apart for Nicole. She just hadn’t left behind her heraldy of the Countess of Edgewater, but also his precious 2 years-old daughter, Anne. She was just too young to lose her father. She remembers calling her father in a hot mess of tears as he took Anne in as she decided to bury him with his family, the one he gave up to marry the heiress, who was then 19. Rushed, yes, but they were so in love. Alaric was only 25, but he was a blessing. They held a whole 10 years of marriage. In 2011, when Nicole was just 20, she fell pregnant. Alaric couldn’t believe it! His beloved, delicate wife was pregnant and willing to do have them.

Three weeks after her 21st birthday, she gave birth to a healthy, beautiful girl called Anne after Anne Neville and Anne Boleyn. Yes, Alaric and Nicole met in their history major class. They could talk from English royalty to Greek mythology and the use of witchcraft in the medieval era and the Worldwide II and the reality of living in the Victorian Era. They were the soulmates of the Oxford University, they were invincible!

After Nicole finished her studies early, they got married and lived happily.

But happiness is short, and soon the crisis came to England and Alaric found more difficult to be there for his family and the work. Nicole had to find a job as a waitress in a bar and with her daughter’s disability, the autism, it was all an impossible challenge. Soon, Alaric had to forgive his abusive mother so he could use her influence to find the best school for disabled children. It wasn’t easy, because the grandmother loathed entirely the kid, but wanted to win Alaric at all costs and get rid of Nicole. They argued nonstop and their plans to have a second child went to hell, for they barely spoke when they finally got the chance.

Alaric’s mom got him a job at the university of Cambridge, which made them move there. Poor Anne was just 4 years and found another school. She loathed changes, and cried over a week before settling it reclutantly.

Soon, Nicole noticed how tense Alaric was around her and how passive he was with Nicole. He was still a good father, he still helped her with the homework, made her soup when she was sick and loved her, but something was clearly on his mind and wouldn’t tell Nicole. She asked, begged him to tell him what was with him, but he shrugged it off saying that they’d talk in the morning.

But that morning never came.

The 27th of July of 2014, the police came at Nicole’s door at 3 a.m, announcing that Alaric died in a car crash in the middle of the storm and the drunk driver was nowhere to be found. Nicole dropped on her knees, wailing and screaming, holding her chest, clutching it.

Three days later, the funeral was made and it was the worst day of her life

“This wouldn’t have happened if he hadn’t married this whore!”

“Need I to remind you that this ‘whore’ is the mother of your granddaughter? Don’t you have a little of humanity?!”

“That little, stupid brat is a big mistake that should’ve never existed. You should be the one in that coffin. The world is better off without you, Natalie”

She slapped the woman, hard as she broke in tears “My name… is Nicole Donovan, you bitch!”

She grabbed her daughter, bid her goodbyes to her husband in the coffin and left as no-one defended her.

The next few years, she applied again in the university, graduated and got a job as a librarian in a cozy library in London, decided to make a new path for herself, for the sake of little Anne. She spoke to her father so it’d be Anne who, when she were 16, she’d be the Viscountess and soon heiress of Edgewater instead of her. She just wanted a life with her daughter, bonding over anything and being a small, happy and healthy family, with no toxicity around.

She worked her way up to find a fitting school for Anne without her former family-in-law’s influence, and they all accepted her for old time’s sake and to honor Alaric’s memory. Working her path as Nicole and not just Alaric’s widow wasn’t easy, but she was strong and determinated young woman. She owed that to her little Anne, who was now a 9 years-old girl: smart, driven, curious and stubborn, just like Alaric.

She wrote a story bed, called The Grand, Bold Alaric, telling epic tales of a time traveler called Alaric where he met gorgeous women and lived many lives and wrote them down to that woman who he’d marry. She wrote more and more, because her little Anne liked it.

That morning, she got a call from an unknown number

“Yes?”

“Good morning, are we talking with Nicole Donovan?”

“Yes, that’s me. Who’s asking?”

“We’re the Marie Curie Academy for Disabled Children in London. We wanted to comment you that the school of your daughter sent us her whole story and we were so fascinated for her and her abilites that we want to give you an interview! We’re just in the middle of a neighborhood where schools are normal, like the presitigious Cornfield Secondary School. We believe we could do of your girl the best at what she can and make her a rightful path to this world and let the rest know that disabled people are actually able to be great! What do you say? Will you stop by and give us a chance?”

She took a deep breath as she looked to her daughter, who played in her tablet to some math game and said, determinated

“I will. When and where do we meet again?”

Footsteps were sounding in the big, fancy halls of the academy as Anne beamed of how fancy it was as Nicole sighed, hoping it’d impress them. She was wearing an elegant suit for kids with her fanciest shoes, while Nicole wore a white shirt with a blue navy blazer and some jeans.

“Nicole and Anne Donovan?” The woman called.

“Ready, kiddo?”

Anne nodded as she got in confidently and Nicole followed suit. They looked at the woman before them, in an elegant attire, her hair in an elegant bun and a white suit.

“Please take a seat. You want any drinks?”

“Water, please”

As the paperwork was settled down, the principal introduced herself

“My name is Principal Donna Bowman. Now, I’d like to ask you a few questions, Mrs. Donovan” Her gaze softened and smiled at Anne “Anne, why don’t dazzle Mr. Chambers with your drawing skills while you Mum and I talk?”

“It’d be an honor to see you draw, Anne” The man who was apparently Mr. Chambers beamed. Anne followed him to the door where a lot of stuff for kids was there

“Now, Mrs. Donovan, even if your daughter is an impressive, bright and clever girl, there are a few things that concern us about you”

“M-me? I thought this was about Anne”

“Yes, but there are a few things we’d love to clear up with you. Like, for example, the father’s presence in Anne’s life. Are you a recent divorcee?”

The memory of Alaric hit her in the chest as she took a deep breath and nodded negatively “No, ma’am. Alaric died when Anne was 2”

“I’m sorry for your loss, Mrs. Donovan”

“I- Thank you”

“Now, tell us about your place work. Even with a scholarship, it is for some people difficult to maintain”

“Well, I have a History degree and major and I work in a library a few miles away from here. I have an agreement with the boss to prepare Anne for school, drop her and collect her”

The woman nodded as she revised some papers before asking her

“Last question: Why do you think Anne is worth it? To be here, I mean”.

She took a deep breath “Anne might see as a silent, shy little girl, but she’s actually intelligent, driven, with potential and can adapt at any situation. She’s stubborn. She’s not a quitter. She is strong, resilient and adapts in many other situations quickly and better than any adults I have seen. She has a keen mind and even if she’s a woman of few words, it makes every word she says worthy. She is kind, with a very open mind for such a young age and loyal to the bone. She is peaceful, the voice of reason and the most supportive kid I ever witnessed. When I was struggling at work, her words kept me sane. That’s why she is worthy and with due respect, it’d be a big mistake not to accept her because of my money rank”.

The woman nodded as she scribbled in the notebook before breaking into a smile.

“I’ll be damned, Mrs. Donovan, I’m sold. Congratulations, your daughter is accepted. I will start the proceedings. Here, have the school number”.

In a minute, the kind man called Bart emerged with Anne giggling and observing a drawing, unusual thing of Anne. She grabbed her mother’s hand and pointed excitedly to her drawing. It was her dressed as Wonder Woman and Anne was Wonder Girl. Nicole smiled at her and bid her goodbyes. They both emerged from the school, beaming as they watched London’s sun setting, making a peaceful and unusual afternoon. It was surprising that it hadn’t started raining just yet. Anne was collecting different leaves and went to collect one and she observed. She was about to snap a photo when someone crashed into her, making her wobble and almost fall! A pair of strong arms grabbed her in the act as she grabbed the shoulder by instinct. She looked up to see who saved her from falling: a rather tall man, blue eyes and a slight beard, his expression stoic and his brown hair messy. He helped her steady as she cleared her throat “Look, I appreciate your saving, but you should watch where you’re going”.

“Apologies. I did not see you at all”.

“Mommy!” Anne called. She glared at the man before rushing towards her daughter.

“Anne! What is it?” She asked, worried.

“Are you okay? That rude broody man almost dropped you”.

She chuckled at her before kissing her head, comforting her “It’s nothing Mama cannot handle. Let’s go”.

When the classes started, Nicole looked at her daughter, proud of her as she braided her hair. She kissed her forehead and observed the herd of children running to the school and how peaceful and noiseless Anne’s future classmates were. She looked with curiosity to the school beside Anne’s and found that broody man again, waving goodbye to his daughter. She was older than Anne, maybe two or three years older, with long, black hair in a low ponytail and intense blue eyes like her father, a rather tall girl and a serious expression. Like father like daughter she guessed. She did heard that both schools collaborated together to show that disabled people and ‘regular people’ could get along and respect each other.

“Excuse me, miss?” She turned around to see a tall, black handsome man behind her, a shy smile on his face, scratching the back of his neck “I hope I am not bothering or being too forward, but I wanted to say that I like your style and you have a beautiful daughter”.

“Oh, thank you! You’re very kind and sweet…?”.

“Luke. Name’s Luke” He introduced himself.

She gave him a polite smile “I am Nicole Dono—Ahem, Foredale. Nicole Foredale” It’s been so long since she used her maiden name, that it felt weird, but last thing she wanted was some stranger knowing her as a widow. It was time to leave that habit behind. Alaric would have understood.

“My friends and I saw you here lonely and wondered if you wanna join us and have some beers together, get to know the schools and neighborhoods. Alas, our only female friend is sick of us, a bunch of men”.

“I can’t blame her. I actually have a day off, so… I’m in, I guess”.

He smiled relieved as he indicated her where they’d go, his hand close to her back in case she needed guidance. They ended in a cozy, warm bar. It had some fancy seats of multi people there and here, people chatting and charging their phones and a welcoming décor. Luke waved at some group and headed with Nicole to them.

“Guys, this is Nicole Foredale. Nicole, these people are Bart, Yusuf, Annabelle, Hamid and Ernest, even though he’s so silent and stoic that sometimes he looks like a furniture. Say hi, guys, and be nice to her! Not all days I can persuade a beautiful woman to join us!”.

The woman there stood with a beautiful, tan skin, black, curly hair and grey eyes. She smiled at her as she greeted her with two air kisses “Hm, I like this one, Luke. The shocking thing is that she acceded to come with you” The woman teased.

The other man, with Muslim features smiled at her widely as he greeted her with two air kisses too, a casual but extravagant look “A pleasure. It’s been long since we had the privilege of such a beauty to sit with us. No offense, though, dear Annabelle”.

The other men, Bart and Yusuf, a very adorable gay couple, greeted her with beaming smiles as they praised her too and she felt welcome. When she turned to greet the so called Ernest, she froze in her place. That was the man that almost made her fall!

“You… are the jerk that almost trampled me”.

“I’m sorry?” He looked a bit puzzled, but then his eyes lit with recognition “Oh… right. I didn’t notice you then”.

The whole desk looked at them, amused and shocked.

“Well” Bart commented, enjoying the scene “this lunch will be interesting”.

#playchoices fanfiction #desire and decorum #desire and decorum au #single mother au #ernest sinclaire #oc: nicole donovan #the viscountess

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lovinmullen · 5 years ago

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the pacific: part one, live blog because i said so

he looked so pissed when he has to make the sign of the cross to mary..... I KNOW ITS BECAUSE HES FALLING AWAY FROM HIS RELIGION but all i can think is undercover protestant????? i hate that i find myself funny stfu tom like he’s some angsty protestant like ‘this is fucking bullshit why the fuck DO THEY PRAY TO MARY’ which..... is a huge missconsperion but i’m not gonna get into that right now but hey if anyone needs an rs teacher? i got you

are you telling me i could have heard the most BEAUTIFUL monologue about the saint mary’s church and her plans for the day as well as being able to see that sweet sweet smile on vera’s face for longer but it was cut short because bobo went ‘i joined the marines’ GOOD FOR YOU BUT.....

rOBERT...... you really gonna give her THAT look...... IN GODS HOUSE is this allowed? is THIS ALLOWED???? if you don’t say it in the voice of the vine we can not be fteejssn sorry i don’t make the rules

#BOB: i wanna catholic girl that go to church AND READ HER BIBLE (is that even right??? omg i can only remember the jewish one *in the voice of ryan reynolds severely slowed down* FUUUUUCCCKKK)

on a real note this man saw her at church ONCE and his ass went finna wife up like........ take her out to dinner first. OR AT LEAST ASK HER HOW SHE IS IN THE LETTERS like we get it you’re emo, the aussie won’t shag you anymore and you keep pissing your pants. i understand it’s a hard not life or how ever that song in annie goes but bro.........(this is obviously a joke i am dumb of ass please ignore me i love you m8 and i’m sorry you’re gonna embarrass yourself in front of everyone but chuckler shifts to momma mode so you good)

can we please acknowledge jon’s acting..... sir? PHENOMENAL he’s not even saying anything??? he’s just looking at the lt yet i’m near tears

gentle reminder i love the basilones🥺🥺🥺 the way they are so supportive even though they don’t understand and they are scared for him but they accept and respect that john wants more, needs more and they’re putting their own fears aside so he can spread his wings for no better turn of phrase.

‘just get the job done, and come home to us’ the way his head falls and he has to stop his voice from breaking. i’m s fucking bitter

THE HAND HOLD MY GOD

leckie:((( look hes a bastard and he pisses me off but no matter how much i bully him i do love him a lot and the complete disregard and uncaring nature from his dad breaks my heart. a handshake then gone just like that? HIS FACE BEFORE ‘there’s a war on everybodies got to make sacrifices’ he looks so hurt and broken baby

GENE MY SWEET SWEET BABY GOD THIS SO SAD ALEXA PLAY DESPACITO. my baby just wants to do his part :( CUT THE CAMERAS DEAD ASS I WILL CRY BABY PLEASE DON’T CRY JUST WAIT A FEW MORE EPS my heart really do be looking like: <eugene3

‘gene, supper’s ready’ ma’am i’m sorry but he does not give a shit

SIDNEY MY SWEET SWEET BOY get in a pram if you’re going to be so baby. look while i love him so much and i know he didn’t mean it to be !!!!! he’s just small of brain !!! but when he says “i wish we where going together” that lowkey rubs it in man......... like he’s already heartbroken PLEASE STOP but the “yeah well you take care of yourself greaser” - “you don’t have to worry about me” IM SOFT🥺

“wOWoWOoOOO COME ON GUYS I WORKED HARD FOR THESE ORANGES”

“guadal...kenel...guadal BLEEHHH” didn’t realise hoos was recreating the audience of my english speaking exam. LOOK I REALISE NOW TALKING ABOUT STOICISM TO A BUNCH OF 15 YEAR OLDS WHO DON’T CARE WAS A BAD IDEA BUT I GOT A DESTINCTION SO FUCK YOU TO THAT ONE KID

chuckler baby..... i’m in love with a dumbass. also the hit across the head. i’m soft (lads lets take a shot every time i say i’m soft in this liveblog ITS GONNA BE A FUN NIGHT jk drink responsibly and all that jazz or be dick winters that’s cool too!! heck do a babe heffron and get yourself a caprisun you deserve it)

“professor leckie” please don’t fuel his ego HE DOES NOT NEED IT

HOLD UP I NEED TO SWITCH FROM THE TV TO MY LAPTOP TO SCREEN CAP THIS SHIT LEW MY SON HAVE YOU BEEN BITING INTO AN ORANGE LIKE IT IS AN APPLE??? I WOULD BE MAD BUT HE LOOKS SO CUTE on a real note though can you eat the skin???? will he be okay?????

okay two hoos things: 1.) he looks SO DONE and i’m living for it 2.) can we talk about jacobs nose..... IM DYING TO TALK ABOUT JACOBS NOSE

okay the boats scene give me saving private ryan flashbacks i came out here to have a good time AND I AM NOT HAVING A GOOD TIME oh wait never mind runner just went ‘i could really use a stiff one right now’ i hate that but he saved the day with his dumbassery so thank you good sir i love you with all my heart

fun fact my how co ranking goes chuckler, runner, hoos, leckie

OH FUCK I FORGOT SID SJAKSJSJ y’know for someone who talks about how much they love sid i forget about him a lot. thank you for blessing my screen with your pretty face it helped me remember you exist LMAO guys my memory is not okay i’m actually concerned...... but more importantly i’d put him between hoos and leckie in the ranking :,)

call it what it is. babyism. y’all better stop before i cuddle you LOOK AT THIS SHIT THEY’RE ADORABLE

runner is the only bitch i respect in this house he’s so fucking funny

‘they’ve? poisoned? a? billion?! coconuts?’ that poor son of a bitch BLESS HIM don’t shoot the messenger okay? he seems like a sweet bean

that shot of hoos, leckie and chuckler looking down at the camera into the bunker? my sexuality. my left brain: tomas stop thirsting it’s an intense and serious show. my righ brain: but?? they’re pretty?? me nodding smugly and in agreement: BUT THEY’RE PRETTY.

THIS MAN AND HIS GUM I CAN’T why is that me. i am the gum man at my school that sounds so weird ajsksjsj i just always have gum. ALSO spearmint is superior to normal mint. NORMAL MINT BURNS LIKE ITS SPICY BRO. bubblemint is superior superior but that’s more expensive rip😭😭😭😭😭😭

‘it’s like the fourth of july’ nice to my boy sufjan getting some rep he is king of the gays after all mr i can’t explain the state that i’m in the state of my heart he was my best friend. we all owe him EVERY parallel on this goddamn app. jk there’s one other king of the gays and that is demon! shane (bfu). no this is not up for debate

the shot of the ships is phenomenal. that’s one thing i do have to credit hbo on. the special effects and cinematography are beautiful and so fucking impressive like???

‘we’re killing them’ - ‘where’s the navy?’ / ‘gone we lost four cruisers’ GOD I HAVE SUCH A LOVE HATE RELATIONSHIP FOR FORSHADOWING LIKE SOMETIMES ITS SO SEXY AND OTHER TIMES IM LIKE PLEASE FOR THE LOVE OF GOD GO AWAY

WHY DOES SID LOOK OVER HIS SHOLDER BEFORE TAKING THE WINE SIR NO ONE IS GONNA TELL YOU OFF AT WAR FOR DRINKING UNDERAGE like???? i don’t think an 18 year old having a swig is their biggest problem bless his heart

‘can’t fight em drunk don’t fight em at all’

bill if you are reading this i’m free on thursday night and would like to hang out. please respond to this and then hang out with me on thursday night, when i am free😌😘🥰😳🥺👉👈😤💘💓🙄🥴

FUCK I FORGOT HOW LOUD THE GUN SHOTS WHERE THINK I JUST WOKE THE WHOLE NEIGHBOURHOOD JC

‘skipper? skipper are you okay?? goddamnit he’s lost it come on’ :(((((

god the shots in this show really are phenomenal. i know it’s very gory and very hard to watch at times but it definitely has the best shots of the three en mi opinion. i’m a slut for the close up of dick screaming ‘move out’ with rounds flying. like who’s ever call that was? outstanding but like that’s just one? the pacific has so many emotive and excellently shot scenes.

JOG ON. STOP. IM SO SOFT IM GOING TO CRY THIS IS NOT OKAY. MOMMA CHUCKLER I CAN’T🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺

how seemlessly the scenes flow one after the other despite being opposite ends of the spectrum i DID NOT GIVE TP ENOUGH CREDIT like yeah it makes me sad as fuck but from a production point of view the writing? the acting? the cinematography? DAMN

how visibly torn and pissed off hoosier looks over the other marines tormenting the japanese soldier, stringing out his death when he’s obviously in a lot of mental as well as physical pain? the only bitch i respect in this house.

okay so like? while the shot is scarring both for him and the audience to see that kind of effortless murder it was the right thing to do? it’s better then have him be tormented and it will help leckie in the long run? how broken he looks though? like the distance is his eye and the way he swollows....... WHO IS CUTTING ONIONS HUH???? brilliant james BRILLIANT

the way i just said ‘if biology would have permitted it i would be asking you to have my babies’ at the sight of a man shoving smokes up his nose....... now ladies theyzies and gents, a prime reason to show why you should do your work. this is tom. tom didn’t do his work. with nothing to do all day tom became bat shit..... don’t be like tom. okay like it is cute though COME ON

HOW PROUD AND SMUG AND HAPPY HE LOOKS AT HIS PREMOTION ‘yes ma’am i am a corporal’ HE IS SO BABY AND FOR WHAT. oops sorry lads looks like i dropped this:

the shot of leckie swimming in the water fading off to the shot of the dead bodies mirroring his movement but obviously a life less version OOOH IMMA SUE

god love me some men with black lungs LECKIE DO BE LOOKING GOOD LIGHTING THAT CIG DAMN

“i have a girlfriend lucky me” HOOS IS LIKE MY GAY ASS YOU SURE????

“you guys step aside the real marines are here now” “AND I’VE BEEN HERE FOR SOME TIME” that shuts iconic even i said wahayyyy

also runner..... i am looking RESPECTFULLY👁👁

you’re not special leckie we all want hoosier

sister👀👀👀👀👀👀👀👀👀

baby gene :,( YOU GINGER LIL BEBE I LOVE YOU SO FUCKING MUCH

can you really call yourself a hbo war an if you don’t sing along at the end... ITS A TUNE also hoos’ voice...... its about the drawl.......

#god ive missed these idiots #im so glad i rewatched #im a bit scared for the rollercoaster that is the rest of the series however asjsksjks #enjoy me being an idiot #thank you to the beauties that told me how to do the keep reading thing you da best xxxx #the pacific #hbo war #eugene sledge #bill hoosier smith #lew chuckler juergens #robert leckie #sidney phillips #wilbur runner conley #john basilone

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